#don't even come at me for misinterpreting this narration.. i know

[allthegothihopgirls]

'affectionately' 'OUR lives' ???? ok jason 'this isn't a team' todd, what happened to solitude and darkness??? you finally found a twink boyfriend to be solitary and dark with??? i'm going to be sick

[ephemeralinstance]

Why is Rook so uncurious?

I've seen people complain that Veilguard changes Solas' motivations. And that's sort of true, but really it doesn't so much change them as just try really hard not to look at them. All of the things we were shown in previous games about the ongoing and serious harm done by the Veil still remain completely true, it's just that Rook is never allowed to ask or think about any of this stuff. Which is frustrating because it significantly weakens Rook's character: they end up coming off as determinedly ignorant and uncurious.

Take the information we're given about why taking down the Veil is bad - which seems entirely limited to Varric's claim that it would 'drown the world in demons.' Rook is constantly parroting this line, treating Varric as the ultimate authority on the matter. But this claim makes very little sense, because it surely cannot be the case that Solas wants to create a world filled with nothing but demons. From Inquisition we know he's greatly distressed every time a spirit becomes a demon, so that can't possibly be the outcome that he's expecting.

Of course, Solas could be wrong; he's certainly been wrong about many things before and he's not thinking very clearly. But even so, why on earth would we take Varric's word over Solas' here? Solas is an ancient and knowledgeable mage, the only person around who lived before the Veil, and he literally made the Veil. Whereas Varric is not a mage, has never studied magic or spirits, and is canonically frightened of the Fade and spirits: in the Lighthouse he mentions several times that he finds this 'Fade shit' weird. How could he possibly be in a position to know better than Solas about what would happen if the Veil came down?

Maybe I as a player can just accept that because Varric is The Narrator he must be right about all this. But Rook doesn't know that Varric is The Narrator. So it just feels like Rook is either incredibly ignorant or so devoted to Varric that their ability to think for themself has completely shut down. It's such an odd, anti-intellectual, anti-expert framing: don't do research or talk to anyone who has knowledge on the matter, just accept unquestioningly what your friend says.

Equally frustrating is the absence of any critical thinking about Solas' reasons for doing what he's doing. The only thing Varric and Harding tell Rook about this is that Solas is doing it because the ancient world was beautiful, but what does that mean? And is it really plausible that Solas is doing all this just because of aesthetics?

Rook hears Solas say 'The Veil is a wound on the world,' and never once thinks to ask - what did he mean by that? A wound is something that causes harm, that causes pain. What is the Veil harming? What pain is it responsible for? (From previous games we know the answer, of course. It's harming spirits, mages, and perhaps elves. But Rook never bothers to ask Solas, or to ask anyone else, or even to try to think about for themself about it.).

There's a moment right at the very end, where Solas is finally permitted to mention that he's doing this partly for the spirits. But in a perfect encapsulation of their whole dynamic, Rook immediately interrupts him. Doesn't even let him finish his sentence. Rook is so completely confident that they know best for the spirits and that this person who literally was once a spirit couldn't possibly have any insight into the matter.

At the beginning of the game Varric comments that he chose the name 'Rook' because Rook tends to think in straight lines. Which struck me as odd at the time, because 'thinks in straight lines' sounds like Varric is saying Rook isn't very smart. I thought I must have misinterpreted it, because why on earth would you choose to impose as a requirement on all players that their pc must lack critical thinking? But looking back I can see that's kinda exactly what they did, which - maybe they thought it would be more relatable? Still, if you're going to impose a fixed personality on the main character of a game, it's baffling to me that you would pick 'absence of critical thinking' as one of their main features.

[nabi-unveiled]

Hiii!

Several times lately you've said my personal weatherman is a comfort show.

You do realize it's an abusive relationship don't you?

I'm not sure why you would find comfort in abuse, but it may be something to reflect on or talk about with someone.

I say that with the upmost kindness.

Hello Anon!

I do love My Personal Weatherman. I take GREAT comfort in that show. It's not flawless by any means, but it makes my synapses buzz in the best possible way.

That doesn't mean it's a comfort show for everyone.

I am fully aware that many find Segasaki/Yoh's dynamic to be problematic or consider it an abusive relationship. If you see it that way, I can certainly understand why you wouldn't find it a comfort show. It's a valid response to that interpretation.

Before I go further, please know that I do not want to negate anyone's personal experiences or opinions in this post. You are more than welcome to disagree!

But on MY blog - I will defend these characters with everything in my being.

In short - I do NOT see it as an abusive relationship. I see it as two people figuring out how their life together is going to work. Which is HARD and ONGOING. Especially for two introverts who keep a lot of their thoughts in their heads. I feel that struggle in the core of my being.

Thanks to some of the subtitle/scripting issues, many people misinterpret how long they've "lived together". (That post has a pretty great timeline if you're interested.) They didn't start living together until Yoh graduated, and they've only been living together a few months. They are still learning a lot about each other and their relationship. Even if they'd been living together a long time, figuring life out together is a process. It's not an easy one.

Do I think either character is a green flag? ABSOLUTELY NOT.

Are they very flawed people? Yes.

Are they crap communicators? Yes.

Is there a power imbalance? Yes, but only when Yoh allows it. Yoh enjoys the power play. Yoh IS allowing it. No question in my mind on that score.

It's VERY important to realize that Yoh is the epitome of an unreliable narrator and partial viewpoints/perspectives are in play. For anyone not familiar with it, that means Yoh's perspective is misleading us to a degree in the early episodes. His words in particular cannot be trusted. Before someone comes at me about dismissing a character's words or belittling their feelings, this is an actual literary and narrative tool.

I love Yoh. He's processing best he can. He doesn't know the best words to use. He struggles to figure out what his emotions mean and how to read other people. Like most of us in life, he's figuring crap out.

And Segasaki is figuring his crap out too. But they're TRYING.

Now do I think their relationship is a role model for "BDSM" as it sometimes gets labeled? Please. Dear God. No. Just no. That requires GOOD communication and clear negotiation. See earlier point. They're crap at that...so very human.

However, I do think this is a lifestyle dominant/submissive relationship. By that I mean they have naturally fallen into these roles based on their personalities and preferences. It's more common than you might think, but that's probably an entirely different post.

Actually, if you're interested in the dominant/submissive aspect, LutaWolf had a whole series of posts about this show.

There is also a fabulous amount of language analysis for this show that dives into what the language usage says/depicts about their relationship.

And yes, I've read every one of those posts. Most of them multiple times. I read them when they were WROTE. I have an entire folder of posts about this show BOOKMARKED on my computer, because I didn't even have a Tumblr account at the time.

Where was I? Oh right - why I find comfort in it. Like many things I like or love, I don't really know. Why do I find pangolins adorable? Why do I love sweaters? Why do I enjoy asymmetrical earrings? I don't stress over it. I just accept that I love them.

Is it because I think the sexuality embedded and a rain soaked Yoh are BEAUTIFUL? I'm sure that is 100% part of it. It's a valid reason to indulge.

Is it possibly a result of me growing up in a hierarchical community with a heavy amount of toxic masculinity that I enjoy seeing dominant/submissive interactions? Maybe. That would not make my enjoyment of the show less valid.

Is it possibly a manifestation of untreated trauma or personal struggles of some kind? Maybe. That would not make my enjoyment of the show less valid.

Is it possible that I see either myself or my own relationship in their relationship at times? Yes, that is absolutely true. Still a valid reason to enjoy it.

Regardless, here's what I know without a doubt.

🍛

Segasaki eats the curry. Every. damn. time. And Yoh makes it. Every. damn. time.

There's an entire essay in why that's so very very important for both of them.

🔆

Yoh wants this relationship. Badly.

There's an entire essay in why I think that too.

🌀

Segasaki NEEDS Yoh. Yoh is his safe space. The one place he can relax and be himself.

There's an entire essay in that one too.

I haven't thought about this show just a little. I've lived and breathed in this show. I could write books on this show.

But frankly, feel free to worry about me if you want. If that's what you want to spend your energy on, have at it. I won't be stressing though. Because as much as I enjoy this show, Segasaki is not who I want.

I know the real dream when I see it.

It's Manju's husband. If only. Manju is the one living my dream here. Fully accepted for her nerdy, kinky, fangirl self.

[uhohbestie]

Please don't take this as hate; I don't mean it as a baseless negative remark against your fic, I mean this genuinely. I recently read TAMN and it personally wasn't for me, but given the popularity I want to know if I'm misinterpreting something or if maybe this just isn't my cup of tea (which, again, for the record is of no grievance to you, that would just be my own issues lol).

I think my biggest gripe with it was Grian as a character. Throughout the whole story, even as he justified his own actions and the narrative explained his reasoning, I hated him. And obviously, this was the point. We were meant to hate him, he's kind of a peice of shit. However, later in the story it kinda felt like there was a narrative push for Grian to be "redeemed" in his own way (namely around the time of the bite and beyond), but it still didn't feel justified to me. Scar had developed a toxic dependance for Grain, which was reasonable, given the circumstances, but Grian made efforts to course correct that, at least to me, paled in comparison to what was done. Still, the narrative forgave him, Scar forgave him, and I'm wondering if it was meant for the reader to forgive him too? The narration repeatedly explains that in any other circumstances, Grian would not have been forgiven. But is he meant to become a character we understand for his flaws? I feel like the resolution was too short for me to fully be able to rationalize that, and the main conflict wasn't resolved until what felt like the final moments. For all the bad stuff that occurred I wasn't sure. Again this isn't meant to put down your art, I'm just legitimately wondering. Thank you for your amazing contribution to so many's lives /gen

Hi! Really glad you sent this ask actually, cuz it gives us the space to talk openly about this! I'm gonna address the start of this generally and then move into TAMN in specific, just for clarity's sake. (And fwiw, not all of this is directed at you Anon, but more-so your ask being used as a jumping point to talk about this topic in general!)

So, putting TAMN (and our own biased feelings as the authors of it LOL) aside: I think that most people who've been in any fandom for a long enough time know that just because something is popular, doesn't mean it's good. And at the same time: just because something is good, doesn't mean it will be popular. What people tend to gloss over, though, is: just because something is popular or good, or maybe even both at once, doesn't mean you have to like it.

You are allowed to dislike or even hate a fanwork Just Because™️. You don't have to have a reason for it! In fact, if in trying to find a reason, you end up hurting people who do harmlessly enjoy it, maybe you're better off leaving well enough alone, you know?

All that to say--Lock and I knew when we started writing TAMN, that it would be an unpalatable/unpleasant topic for a lot of people, and we made our peace with that. It was our first fic ever in this fandom, with a controversial topic (cheating) we wanted to expound on, in a genre (zombie AU) that not everyone likes, so we knew not everyone would find it to their tastes. And that's okay! People are allowed to be disinterested in what we've written, and to dislike it for its contents! (Not that anyone needs our permission in the first place LOL) That's simply a given with any work you put out into the world, difficult topics or not!

So please don't ever feel like you have to read or have to like something just because others do. Not just when it comes to TAMN, but in anything in life! It's better for all of us if we engage in things we enjoy, and ignore/pass over the things we don't without trying to either: 1) "fix" ourselves to make ourselves like it, or 2) "fix" the thing we don't like to suit our tastes better.

Not everything appeals to everyone and that's okay! :D 💜

Now to get into the specifics of TAMN and the things you've discussed--

Grian is a complex character in TAMN, and it does take quite a while to unravel him. That said, Grian didn't start changing after he got bitten. He started changing the moment Scar caught him cheating.

It can be hard to see plainly because the fic is primarily in Scar's POV for Arc 1 (and Scar is admittedly extremely uncharitable towards Grian in that part), but Grian is constantly trying to make things up to Scar. Keeping him safe from zombies, lifting the heavier objects so Scar doesn't have to push himself, going out into danger so Scar won't have to; it may not seem like much, but Grian does start making an effort to course-correct his behaviour the second he truly processes how badly he messed up.

Later on, Scar himself admits that he brushed aside everything Grian tried to do for him at the start of the fic because he was blinded by his hurt and anger. Scar is imperfect. He let his anger take over, so he lashed out at Grian multiple times (setting Ariana on fire; accusing Grian of coercing him even though it was untrue; etc.) when he shouldn't have, and when it was unfair to. He was petty and unkind several times when they were with KSQ and Grian felt insecure. Scar had his own growing to do, his own character arc, and while you could argue that Grian "deserved" the way Scar treated him, it's important to keep in mind that he was already trying to be better, and Scar (and thus, the reader) couldn't see it until the initial anger, betrayal and, yes, hatred, had passed.

Secondly, I wouldn't really say TAMN is a redemption story. TAMN is more-so about exploring how a damaged person can rob themself of any happiness when they get stuck in a spiral. It's about how Grian kept telling himself that he needed to change and Be Better, when Scar had always loved him for who he was, flaws and all. The only thing Grian really needed to do was apologise, something Scar pointed out to him several times. Trying to completely upend who he was, was a stipulation Grian put on himself, because he couldn't fathom why anyone would or could ever love him the way he was.

Finally, while we definitely intended the narrative to take on a neutral stance on whether Grian should be forgiven or not, I can see where it might seem like the narrative insists on Grian being forgiven. (Probably unconscious on our parts as authors, since we do love Grian sooo so much.) That said, Scar in-text does not forgive him by the end of the fic. He pretty explicitly says that, while he wants to forgive Grian, he's not quite there yet. He asks for time, because while he loves Grian and doesn't want to be without him, forgiveness isn't linear and he can't promise to Be Okay again all at once.

The progression of TAMN isn't "Grian cheats, becomes better through the clarity of death, and Scar forgives him," it's "Grian cheats, learns that his flaws and vulnerabilities don't have to define him, and he and Scar agree to work on their relationship together." TAMN ends with hope--that Grian and Scar have discovered that (for better or worse, depending on who you ask) they'd rather be together, and even if they're not 100% okay right now, maybe, with some teamwork and effort and elbow grease, they could be in the future. We like to think that makes it hopeful, without being too reductively "and they lived happily ever after." :")

As for whether the reader is meant to forgive Grian or not--that's entirely up to the reader. Everyone has different levels of what they can or cannot forgive, and just because one person might forgive someone, doesn't mean everyone can or even should. You can love or hate Grian for what he did, the narrative is just there to tell you that he made an effort. He broke down and let himself be vulnerable, and came out better for it, albeit a little worse for wear. While some might need to see him work at it more and really earn forgiveness, others would be fine with this, or even less. Stories are inherently up for subjective opinion and interpretation.

As far as TAMN is concerned, though, the place that Grian arrived at was enough for Scar, and that's why TAMN ends where it does. Their journey is not over, and it's something we want to continue writing about and exploring, but narratively we had to find an end-point for TAMN, otherwise we'd still be writing it to this day!

Anyhow, I could ramble about TAMN!Grian forever and this has already gotten long enough. I hope this explains some of our thoughts as the authors, but please understand that by no means is this us trying to coax you into coming around on our fic. By the sounds of it, it just might not be for you and that's totally cool! We have plenty of other fics you might like where the characterization is more Hermitcraft and less The-Darkest-Take-of-Life-Series-Imaginable LMAO, and we're so lucky that this fandom is full of incredible fanfics to read.

At the end of the day, TAMN is a fic Lock and I wrote self-indulgently for one another, and we completely get that a fic that we planned out with just OUR tastes in mind might be seriously out of the scope of being considered enjoyable for other people. We're always surprised and so grateful that it's gotten the reception it has, especially because we know what a difficult read it is.

Thank you for reading our fic even though it wasn't your thing, and thank you especially for sending such a polite, non-judgmental ask about it. :") 💜

[sturnsdc]

ART CLASS AU!

pair: Carl Grimes x fem!reader

synopsis: Yn has feelings for her classmate, Carl, but she never does anything about it. However, things seem to work in her favor when they have to work on a project together for the art class.

warnings: no TWD scenes, just fluff, slight angst, somewhat obsessive behavior ??

words: 2,4k

A/N: to make the narration clearer: at all times, Yn is writing in her diary, which is why at times she will speak about Carl, and at other times it may seem like she’s speaking directly to him (but she’s not)!! For the most part, it’s just a bunch of fragments from her diary, as she explains a bit at the end.

this came to my mind suddenly; i apologize for it being so short.

the words in italics are the lyrics of the song !!

dividers from: @cafekitsune ! ♡

main masterlist carl masterlist

YN´S POV

you look pretty good today

is it me or did you shave?

sometimes i wonder if it's normal, if it's real. With each passing day, he seems to become more handsome, and like a magnet, he keeps drawing my gaze again and again. It feels like i can't control it.

i notice when he wears a new shirt, or when he’s wearing the same pants from a few days ago. I notice when he forgets something, when he’s focused, or when he gets distracted.

i just can’t stop noticing him.

good, you've been looking at me twice as more

so i can see your face

when we make eye contact, i feel like i’m going to die. My heart races, my cheeks turn red, my hands sweat, and i stop breathing. Even my stomach tightens, my whole body tenses up. The first time it happened, i thought i was having an attack.

secretly, i enjoy it because when i feel his gaze, i have an excuse to turn my head, look at him, and smile. I don’t even know where i find the courage, but he smiles back at me, with tight lips, then looks away after a few seconds.

my friends told me not to overthink it, that maybe i’m just misinterpreting things. They say if “i keep analyzing every time we make eye contact”, i’ll end up falling for him, and then he’ll break my heart by not feeling the same way.

you sit across from me in the classroom

but do you even know my name?

then i tried to avoid him. He probably doesn’t even know who i am. Does he even know my name? i doubt it; they hardly ever say it out loud in class. I don’t even know everyone else’s names.

but then everything seems to align, and the teacher walks to that side of the room while giving the lesson, as if she knows i’m following her with my eyes. And there he is, on the other side of the classroom, in his plaid shirt and with those pretty eyes, taking notes on everything she’s saying… while i lose my breath and forget what i was listening to.

Carl... i do know your name.

if you want to ask me how i am

don't hesitate

it was a couple of days after the teacher announced the final project. The art class would have to hold a fair, showcasing our own works, from paintings to ceramics. It had to be in pairs, but we couldn’t pick our usual partners. We had to step out of our bubbles and take a risk.

i thought about him, but my embarrassment consumed me, so i let the days pass. And just two days before the next class, i ran into him in the hallway. He seemed surprised. His blue eyes looked at me in a strange way, almost like he was unsure of something. Then he made a move to come closer, and i started to get nervous.

he did it; i didn’t expect him to. He spoke to me, asked if we could pair up, and all i could do was say yes, with a dazed look and stumbling over my words. Then he smiled, like i’d never seen him smile before. His face lit up, and he walked away, happy.

did i do the right thing? how am i gonna focus if i could barely even speak to him?

'cause you're my cru-cru-crush

and i like you very much

i have to admit, Carl Grimes is a special guy. I can’t stop thinking about him, about the little details i’ve noticed, about the brief interactions we’ve had. It’s like my world is starting to revolve around him.

he’s a gentleman—so masculine yet so gentle. He speaks to me with such care, even though i’ve seen him outside of class, joking roughly and arguing with his friends. He’s the complete opposite.

i like this side of him, when he focuses all his attention on me, asks for my opinion, and smiles at me. I haven’t seen him talk like that with anyone else. 

should i get my hopes up?

and i'd appreciate if you'd like me back

but it's okay 'cause you make my heart

we started talking about the project.

he’s so smart, coming up with amazing ideas, and i stress over not knowing which one to choose. however, he doesn’t seem worried; he waits for my answer patiently, as if we had all the time in the world, which isn’t true since we have to submit the work plan by the end of the class. but he doesn’t pressure me—he asks for my opinion on each idea and helps me weigh the pros and cons.

we chose one together, and then i started writing our plan.

but… something… feels off. We keep making eye contact, and i smile like a fool, watching as he does the same. Is this really happening? i feel like we’re in a bubble. time no longer exists, air isn’t even necessary—just us.

and then i find myself hoping that he feels the same, because i love how it feels to talk to him, to be the center of his attention, even if just for a moment.

an art class

an art class

art class used to be my escape from other subjects, a room where i felt safe. Then i saw him, and it became more than just that. Thinking about art class sends tingles through my body and instantly puts a smile on my face. My heart races like crazy, and i’m filled with excitement. And it’s all because of him.

now, art class has become something that makes me genuinely happy, motivating me to go to school.

even with the project, i’ve never been this excited to work on an assignment before, but now that i’m at his house, meeting his dad and his sister, and then heading to his room to start working on our project… i feel like i love classwork.

why do you always stick to smiling

and sit still being so quiet?

i feel like he's in the hallways more often now, because i see him every day. Sometimes i'm just turning a corner, and there he is, with his group of friends, laughing and being the smiley guy i used to see only once in a while. 

he's everywhere, all the time. What's going on?

now it's impossible not to notice him, because he's always there. Sometimes i don't even have to see him, because i can hear his laugh, or his friends', and i know we’re in the same place. 

how can he be so loud, but so damn quiet in class? i don’t get it.

it's like a completely different version of him, but i don't mind at all, it's just... weird. 

i've been pretty distracted for some days

and it's ruining my diet

the days go by, and each time i get to know him more and more. He's amazing, funny, super smart, mature, and adorable. I've also gotten to know his family better, and i understand more where that calm and controlled side he shows in class comes from.

everything seems wonderful, and i know my feelings are only growing with each passing minute, but he's starting to occupy my mind all the time, and that's becoming a problem.

my friends talk during lunch, but all i can think about is our conversation from the day before, when we got sidetracked from the project, and he started explaining the story of one of his comics. I can remember how his eyes lit up as he told me about it, and i just kept asking questions, even though i already knew the stories. I love the passion with which he spoke about it. I remember his tone of voice, the way he moved his head, and how his eyes looked at me so attentively. I recall almost every word, but then, when my mind is at its peak, i see my friends getting up from their seats, looking at me with puzzled and concerned faces.

lunch ended, and i didn’t even touch my food.

Carl Grimes, i need to figure this out soon.

if you don't take the hint already

i'm afraid i'll start a riot

i’m trying to figure out if it’s just me, Carl, but i really don’t understand—do you look at me the way i look at you?

now i try to avoid looking at you if i don’t have to, but then i feel a constant gaze, and when i turn my head, there you are, trying to look away as quickly as you can. Am i imagining this?

i feel the frustration building inside me, Carl. I need to know.

today, i try wearing different clothes, the ones i save in my closet for occasions outside of class, the ones i wear when i feel confident. But this time, i don’t feel that way. This time, i’m scared. I want you to notice. I want to know if you care, if you’ll say something.

'cause you make my whole world go crazy

yeah, your smell just sends me flying

and you did, Carl. You told me i looked good, then you got nervous and said i always look good, just that this time i looked different. If you only knew how much that meant to me.

since then, days have gone by, and i feel like you’re paying more attention to me— or have you always done that and i’m just now noticing?

you also started wearing a new cologne; it’s stronger and lingers in the air when you pass by me. Is that on purpose? now i can’t stop thinking about how good you smell, and that alone is enough to keep me floating, my mind in paradise, thinking about how much i like you.

'cause you're my cru-cru-crush

and i like you very much

today i told my friends how i feel about you. They looked at me with pity and talked to me like i was a little girl. They say you don’t feel the same, that i’m imagining everything, and that i’ll end up hurt if i keep this up.

am i really that out of my mind? they say i’m obsessed, that i’m seeing things where there aren’t any.

but they were the ones who told me the first time you looked back at me.

and i'd appreciate if you'd like me back

but it's okay 'cause you make my heart

i've spent some nights crying, and now i’m trying to avoid you. It's so hard when we still have to keep working on the damn project.

i’m scared of getting my hopes up. I started this on my own. you’re not to blame, but now i wish i didn’t have to see you for a couple of weeks.

an art class

an art class

and yet, that day of the week arrives, and along with the anxiety, i can feel the excitement trying to break free. My heart races, my hands sweat, and i can’t catch my breath.

“art class,” says the sign on the door, and just that is enough to shake my entire world and bring back the feelings i’m trying to ignore.

all my days

been trying to find a reason to stay

i keep hearing my friends' words every time i see you, and now i feel guilt, embarrassment, and a horrible pain in my chest that settles in my heart, right next to the happiness you bring me. It makes me feel sick and confused.

you've asked me a couple of times if i'm okay, but how could i answer you with the truth?

say my name

and i'll go ahead and pick a date

i'm okay

if you understand that this is fate

the day of the exhibition arrived, and i’m nervous, and you notice it, so you take my hand and smile at me. You told me everything would be fine, that we did great, and that we would do really well.

you were right. Of course you were...

we spent the whole day there, answering questions and receiving compliments. We really did a good job, and everyone keeps saying that.

now i feel exhausted. All day i had to manage my emotions—the mix of anxiety, the pain in my chest, happiness, satisfaction... and love, the damn love. I feel like handling all that drained me more than talking to so many people and repeating the same words over and over.

finally, we can leave, but then you take my hand again and make me look at you. This time you look more serious, and i start to get scared, but you don’t say anything bad.

“i’m going to be honest, Yn, i loved working with you on this and getting to know you better. Since i saw you in class, something about you caught my attention, but i didn’t know how to approach you. This was the perfect opportunity, and i took it. I understand if you don’t feel the same way i do, but if you do... i’d like to get to know you more and see what can come of this.” that’s what you said, your face blushing and your eyes looking everywhere but at me.

if you only knew that when i got home, i cried, feeling so happy, kicking my legs on the bed like a tv character, and squealing into my pillow so no one would hear me. with my face red and a huge smile.

now we’re going on a date, and i just hope this turns out well.

Carl Grimes, what have you done to me?

art class

art class

i don’t even know when i started smiling, but i finished reading aloud and looked around. Carl, beside me, was smiling widely, and our two little ones had tears in their eyes; apparently, they were moved by the story of how it all began.

i recently found my diary from when i was a teenager, and i told Carl about it in front of the girls, and they both begged me to read it to them. Of course, i paused at the perfect part, at the true beginning of our relationship, but within those pages is everything, including the story of our first time and countless anecdotes from our school days.

i will always be grateful for that class because that’s how i got to know the man who makes me happy.

Carl Grimes is more than my words can describe, but i think i did a good job explaining how i fell for him.

who would have thought that a couple of years later, this would be our life?

in the end, maybe it was part of our destiny.

taglist: @jamiesturniolo

[writingdevil]

hello hello hello hello. do you have any tips for writing paranoid? i get the feeling that i never do my wife any justice whenever i slap him in anything and that is such a tragedy.

i know i rant about him a lot, but it's so hard to put that into practice, and i'm slightly afraid of misinterpreting his character. especially because of all my bias lol

if you do feel like answering, it would also be pretty great if you can add something about cold or contrarian. these two are very dumb too.

Oh gosh me? I know I write a lot of STP stuff, but I am literally never confident in my writing, but for you, neverpathia, I will try, because I also love your wife.

I like to interpret Paranoid in a way that-assuming this is a situation where the voices all have their own bodies- that he still has the instinctive need to worry about everything to keep the flock safe.

I agree with what was said about Paranoid absolutely not being able to cope in the real world, where there is no looming Narrator or a princess that we have to slay. So that forces him to lean back on the others, because he can't take control of their nervous system anymore and keep them alive, so he has to look out in other ways.

I like to write him as someone that worries a lot about the others and sometimes snaps at them, but it always comes from a place of care, even if he goes so far as to distrust someone-he just wants to look out for the others.

He snaps at Contrarian to stop messing around because they need to focus and if they focus then they can't be surprised and they won't be attacked-that sort of thing.

Because of that, I think he gets frustrated, a lot of times at himself, because he knows that he can't control what the others do anymore and he knows that people find him difficult now, but just because the situation's changed doesn't mean that Paranoid has.

I think that's why he snaps and even lashes out because he's trying to look out for them, and he can't just change the way he feels and why don't the others get that? Why can't they see that he's trying to help them, just like before, in the Contrust?

I touched on this in Tongues and Teeth, where Paranoid feels useless in his own body, because he felt useful when they were inside of TLQ, but he realises that he still has skills that are extremely important to the others, even if he can't protect them against a nightmarish princess anymore.

I think if you just nail down the why of characters, then I feel like you're off to a good start.

Why does Paranoid not trust the princess? Because she could harm them, and they don't know what she's capable of, then they have to assume the worst to be sure and safe.

Why does Oppy switch sides so much? Because he craves safety and power and the only way to get that is by figuring out who can ensure that, whether slaying or saving the princess is what that person wants, all the way up until he gets to hold the power himself.

Also, don't feel bad if you misinterpret a character! You just have to keep writing them and reading about them until you have a good grasp of them. Hell, half the time I feel like I write the voices wrong, especially Cold and Broken, but I'll never get better if I don't keep writing them to understand them.

For Cold and Contra, I still don't feel very confident in how I interpret them. I don't write a lot of Contra but I know there's more to him than just being a funny little gesture, that he has a lot of self loathing that he covers up with jokes. With Cold, I feel like I lean too heavily on wanting to experience new and exciting things, and not on the actual feeling numb about pointless things, and I think he actually cares a lot, just in his own Cold way.

Hope this helps! (Even though it's probably a load of nonsense)

[cherry-pop-and-rain-clouds]

Wednesday Discussion : Why the Wednesday / Morticia conflict is stupid.

(Show only)

I, among many other fans of the original Addams family, really dislike the route Netflix took with Morticia and Wednesday's relationship in their 2022 adaption. Similar to the (awful) animated movie, they decided to make Wednesday hate her mother for seemingly no reason. The explanation given to us by Wednesday, is that Morticia is trying to 'force' Wednesday to be more like her, a mother and a wife. But this isn't backed up anywhere in the show by Morticia. She never once tells Wednesday that she needs to become a wife and a mother, that she'll be more fulfilled if she does, that it's tradition, nothing like that. She essentially lets her daughter run wild and only interferes when it puts the life of a human boy on the line, and decides to send her to a school that she believes will be able to reel in her daughters bloodlust just a little bit to avoid legal trouble.

While yes, it's possible that the route Netflix was attempting to take was that Wednesday is an unreliable narrator, I believe this was lost in translation and poorly backed up since we spent too much time with two boring love interests instead of Wednesdays internal thoughts and emotions.

Netflix forgot that the Addams Family was built on the foundation of a good, supportive family that were seen as 'strange' because they didn't represent the type of family that was popular during their conception. Morticia would support her daughter no matter what, which includes not wanting to be exactly like her.

Here is how I would've written things of Wednesday was my show;

Instead of having Wednesday hate her mother for her wanting Wednesday to be more like her, make her misinterpret the situation, and be angry at BOTH parents for 'sending her away'. She's angry at Morticia and Gomez for sending her away to a boarding school for 'freaks' as punishment for defending her little brother from being bullied. The car scene would've gone a little like this;

M = Morticia G = Gomez W = Wednesday

M : "Darling, how long do you intend on giving me the cold shoulder?"

W : "Lurch, please remind my parents that I'm no longer speaking to them."

G : "I promise you my little viper, you are going to love Nevermore."

W : "What is there to love about being sent away?"

M : "We're not sending you away."

W : "Yes, you are. You're punishing me, punishing me for defending my brother who was, might I remind you, being bullied."

G : "It's not a punishment if you got expelled and had to move schools anyway."

W : "That's-"

M : "And, we aren't the ones who got you expelled, darling. That boys family was going to press attempted murder charges. How would that have looked on your record?"

W : "Terrible. Everybody would know I failed to get the job done."

*Moment of tense silence fills the car as Morticia takes a deep breath.*

M : "I think that Nevermore will be better suited for you compared to all of the normie schools you've attended before now. You'll meet similar, like minded people. You might even make some friends."

W : "Don't make me nauseous."

G : "Let's make a deal my viper."

*Wednesday raises an unimpressed eyebrow.*

G : "One month, stay at the school for one month. And if you really hate it, we'll put you somewhere else."

M : "Gomez-!"

G : "Come on Tish, you know she'll love it."

W : "Fine. I hope you're ready to come pick me up in a months time then. I won't be staying here long."

At this point, Wednesday isn't aware that her parents attended the school. This is something she would discover while exploring the Academy through things like the fencing group photos and the Nightshade Library. She would subconsciously follow in her mother's footsteps while trying to uncover the mystery of the Hyde and of Goody, and it would eventually come to head during Parents Week.

W : "I'm not like you, mother."

M : "..."

W : "I tried fencing, you captained the team. You were part of the Night shades, and now it's just an abandoned library for idiots to hook up in and party. You led the Poe Cup team to victory three years in a row, I barely won one, I don't want to be a wife and-"

M : "Wednesday."

*Wednesday turns to her Mother, unaware that she had begun rambling. Morticia puts her hand very lightly on Wednesdays shoulder.*

M : "I don't want you to be like me."

W : "Isn't that why you sent me here? To follow in your footsteps?"

M : "No darling. We sent you here because Nevermore allowed me and your Father to meet, and to become who we are today. I knew it would help you too, in your own way."

*Wednesday stares up at her silently.*

M : "I know you won't be like me. And I'll always support that Wednesday."

I want them to have a good mother daughter relationship dammit :(

[sincerely-sofie]

Chapter 4 of Sofie Plays "Slay the Princess": The Wild (Part 1)

I can hear what sounds to be a crying woman in the background music amidst ethereal vocals and I am not happy about this.

[ Beginning ] - [ Previous Part ] - [ Next Part ]

Okay wait wait wait WAIT. I'm really latching onto that last line but hear me out as I ramble for a bit. The Princess is not human. As far as I know, she can't even die--- though that might just be my bad luck and decision making at play. She describes herself as having no beginning and no end. This game tinkers with the concepts of time being cyclical, and the Hero and the Princess's memories are both untouched by time looping, unlike the memories of the Narrator...

... Is she the reason time is looping? The Princess is without end and beginning. In other words, a circle. Is she the embodiment of a time loop?

Alternate theory is that this game is a surreal allegorical story for man's quest for immortality. The Narrator is somehow a representation of the fear of death, and the Princess's imminent threat of destroying the world isn't as pressing of a threat as the Narrator makes it seem. She's inevitable, but she's not in a rush to end things. She said in the first chapter that she likes the world--- though that might have been a lie, come to think of it. The Hero might be a representation of an individual's struggle with death, and how oftentimes when we fight against it, we only draw closer to it. Maybe the whole "this is a love story" line hints at the Hero accepting the inevitability of death, and therefore falling in love with life?

Y'all I'm just slapping things at the wall and seeing what sticks. I don't think either of these theories will prove to be true, but they sure are fun to speculate over!

Okay yeah no I'm definitely playing an allegory for accepting death aren't I. Mankind trying to fight against death and prolonging lifespans past that which would be natural seems to be the symbolic undercurrent of that line.

Narrator are you even listening? It's the wifey talking. But in a disconcertingly neutral, mystically monotone voice that concerns me.

I wasn't even asking myself that second question before now and now I have MANY CONCERNS.

OH MY WORD the narrator's memories are affected by the loop but he's aware of its existence. That's what this means, right?

... I might have disobeyed the entire premise of the game? Just a little bit?

Okay okay this implies that the Hero, if my "allegory for the inevitability of death" theory is true, doesn't represent mankind. But if he doesn't, then what is he?

YOOOOOO NEW PARTY MEMBER!!!!

I'm picturing an exchange like the following:

Hero: Do you ever want to talk about your emotions, Hunted? Hunted: ... No. Broken: I do. Hero: I know, Broken. Broken: I'm sad. Hero: I know, Broken

I mean, there are probably worse things to be... eaten alive, for one thing.

Reading this and thinking about how "this is a love story" and losing my mind and losing my mind and losing my mind and---

Asked the Princess why she was being nice to me after the whole, y'know, swallowing me whole thing, and she's a bit touchy on the subject. She just as quickly resumed the otherworldly calm front, though. Does she have multiple Princesses like I have multiple Voices?

Ah. Hm. Well then.

If I'm going to be assimilated into the world around me and the being I'm struggling against, I'd like to do so after acknowledging the repressed fear I carry. It is time to ponder the orb--- I mean, terror in my heart.

Hahaha thinking about Twig/Ark's early relationship and not crying whatsoever rn :))))

Got a little worried that maybe I actually was a magic all-encompassing forest and had grossly misinterpreted the situation, but hearing the Broken express reluctance to leave a situation in which he's playing pretend at everything being okay makes me feel much more confident in the decision! Nice.

... Are we the same being, but divided in two? That definitely doesn't sound right, but this line makes me wonder...

OKAY ONCE AGAIN I KNOW THIS IS A SERIOUS SCENE BUT I'M JUST SITTING HERE THINKING ABOUT THAT DOG IN MONSTER HOUSE

Broken sweetie you read uncomfortably literally as someone who's been through a very bad relationship and I think you need therapy even more than the Hunted does.

I'm really tempted to see what would happen if I actually fulfilled the premise of the title... but I'm really curious about where that first dialogue option will lead.

We cut her free.

The Narrator threatening us for letting the Princess go is something very interesting and I don't know what else to say other than I'm worried.

Hey chat why are the borders of the screen turning red?

Hey chat why is everything going dark?

HEY CHAT WHAT'S WITH ALL THE ARMS THAT SWALLOWED THE PRINCESS UP AND DISAPPEARED INTO THIN AIR, LEAVING NOTHING BUT A MIRROR BEHIND?

I barely got a screenshot of the last frame of whatever that was and nearly threw my mouse across my room in the attempt.

I am once again coping with humor:

Hero: I'm sorry I'm such a handful. Princess: I have two hands. Hero: I--- look. If you want to play semantics, fine. I'm sorry for being a hundred handfuls. Princess: Hero: Princess (while sprouting several hundred arms): Try me.

(Ran out of image uploads. See you in the next post!)

[darklinaforever]

This person is talking about this video :

For those who know this video, it's precisely a video analyzing tons of moments / events from the Atla series... And not just a girl talking about "vast misinterpretations" for two hours (for those who don't know it, I highly recommend it). There are literal scenes used to prove / support the point of view, exactly as this anti want.

But obviously, this anti will never bother to watch this video, while pretending to know what she is talking about. But, that's the whole principle when we talk about Zutara. We talk about their scenes in the series. No scenes from our imagination ! Wtf ?!

Let's be clear, if I generally post or send this video it is to prevent me from wasting my time unnecessarily sending messages to people who will not change their minds anyway. For what ? Because this video is essentially a summary of my opinion on the Zutara question with the arguments very well illustrated and supported by the scenes of the series and or its narration with the explanation of the character arcs, etc.

What I like the most is seeing people proud to affirm that they don't watch or read Zutara analyses, and then try to pretend they know what we're talking about in our analyzes dedicated to the Ship.

How everything we say is just fantasy, our imagination. That we are actually talking about events that never happened ! Or everything is misinterpretations because Zutara makes us horny. This ship is only based on thirst and the superficial pairing of the color blue and red in addition to their physical appearance ! Nothing deep ! (Thank you again for confirming that you have probably never read or watched Zutara analyses)

I don't understand why it's so hard for people to understand that canonical events aren't always good (especially for the characters) or well done in a story. We have to stop the bullshit. There are tons of examples of series with poor writing choices. Stop pretending that having a different opinion from canon is inherently wrong. (Or the show Atla is perfect)

Especially when your only arguments are to say that the opposing team's analyzes are like this or that, when in fact, you don't even look at them ! You have no credibility.

To say that we like a certain relationship because we are superficial / horny, and that if we like it is because we have understood nothing about the series, to see frankly that in fact we do not like it and that we do not like the characters, just because we don't accept certain choices of creators, is essentially admitting to not having any arguments in my opinion.

The anti Zutara piss me off with their fucking condescension.

Also... saying the Zutara fandom is dead ? Make me laugh.

Also, if you actually like Zutara for these reasons, namely the fire / water, red / blue pairing, the fact that these characters physically fit together and you find them sexy, well there is no does nothing wrong, because it's fictional. But the fact is that I've never seen Zutara fans like this ship for these things (except for the fire and water aspect, but generally in its context of Yin and Yang, therefore complementarity, which is in fact each time associated with the characters, their behaviors, relationships and arcs. So always in a deep and not superficial perspective). In fact they are never even named in the analyzes which I come across. Quite simply because generally, Zutara fans are very intelligent people with remarkable analytical skills regarding the Zutara relationship, canonically a friendship, but also clearly with a romantic connotation of very / too many times... But I won't dwell on that since the very video on this post already talks about it.

Kisses to all Zutara fans. And fuck anyone who comes and tells me, or even thinks, that I don't have a brain.

Merry Christmas to everyone.

[writingduhh]

you were looking for suggestions i see... smirks..

yumi fic about him misunderstanding your tone while hes streaming?? like, hes streaming and you ask for him to come over for a minute and he gets mad because he misunderstood your tone, then the reader gets upset and he comforts them?? kinda like fluff with a lil bit of angst :3

HERE YA GOOO! I hope this is what you were asking for 🙊

Yumi || Misunderstanding

Yumi had been streaming for a few hours, immersed in the game and engaging with his viewers. The excitement in his voice was evident as he narrated his moves, jokes, and many frustrations with the game. You were in the next room, finishing up some work and enjoying the background noise of his stream. After a while, you really needed his help with something, so you decided to call out to him.

"Yumi, can you come here for a minute?" you asked, trying to sound calm but slightly urgent.

Yumi, caught up in the intensity of the game and not fully processing your tone, felt a flash of irritation. He thought you were interrupting him for something trivial.

He muted his mic, turning to the direction of your voice. "Can it wait? I'm in the middle of a stream, and I don't have time for something stupid right now," he snapped, his voice sharper than intended.

His words stung. You hadn't meant to bother him, and the urgency in your voice was because you genuinely needed his help. Feeling the tears welling up, you took a deep breath and retreated to the living room, trying to hold it together. You didn't want to make a scene or disrupt his stream, but the misunderstanding hurt.

A few minutes later, Yumi finished his game and noticed the silence from your direction. Realization dawned on him. He replayed the moment in his head and understood that he had misinterpreted your tone. Guilt washed over him, and he quickly ended the stream, apologizing to his viewers for the abrupt end.

He walked into the living room to find you sitting on the couch, your eyes red from holding back tears. His heart ached at the sight.

“Hey," he said softly, sitting down next to you. "I'm really sorry. I shouldn't have snapped at you like that. I thought you were just... I don't know, interrupting for something small. But I realize now that I was wrong."

You looked up at him, your eyes filled with hurt. "I just needed your help with something important, and the way you spoke to me... it really hurt."

Yumi wrapped his arms around you, pulling you into a comforting embrace. "I'm so sorry. I should have listened better. You mean the world to me, and I hate that I made you feel like this. Please forgive me."

You leaned into his embrace, feeling the warmth and sincerity in his apology. "It's okay. I understand you were caught up in the moment. Just... try to be more mindful next time, okay?"

He nodded, holding you tighter. "I promise. I'll do better. How about we spend the rest of the evening together? No games, no work, no streams, just us.”

A small smile broke through your sadness. "I'd like that."

Yumi pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead, relief flooding through him as he felt you relax in his arms. The misunderstanding had caused a brief moment of pain, but the love and comfort you shared overshadowed it.

Yumi got up and extended a hand to you. "Come on, let's make some dinner together. We can try out that new recipe you found."

You took his hand, letting him pull you up. "That sounds perfect."

In the kitchen, you both moved around in harmony, chopping vegetables and preparing ingredients. Yumi kept glancing over at you, making sure you were okay. Every time he caught your eye, he smiled, and you could see the sincerity in his eyes.

As you worked together, the atmosphere lightened. Yumi cracked jokes, trying to make you laugh, and you found yourself smiling more and more. The tension from earlier slowly dissolved, replaced by the warmth of shared moments.

After dinner, you settled on the couch with a blanket, Yumi's arm wrapped around you. You watched a movie, but neither of you paid much attention to the screen. You were too busy enjoying each other's company, talking softly, and sharing quiet laughter.

At one point, Yumi looked at you, his expression serious. "I really am sorry, you know. I never want to make you feel like that again."

You reached up, cupping his face and in your hand. "I know, Yumi. I forgive you. Let's just focus on this moment, okay?"

He nodded, leaning down to kiss you gently. "Okay."

[ceaseless-rambler]

Okay in regards to this poll I'm going to do some Doc Carmilla analysis because I don't like having back and forth conversations in tags. This is long, I couldn't really find a way to cut it down

The biggest thing that fucks me up about her is Brian's morality switch. The concept of a morality switch at all is horrifying to me, taking that control away from someone. Brian's about page on the mechanisms website says the reasoning was because Doctor Carmilla found it "amusing" which. Makes me hate it even more. @x-ca1iber pointed out the fact that Jonny is an unreliable narrator, which is a good point. However, I doubt Jonny wrote everyone's bio and I don't think either morality mode would really let Brian lie about it, lying is wrong and I can't come up with ends that would justify it. Brian could be wrong about reasoning, of course, but I'm not sure why he would be. Because a lot of that second half is speculation, *please* let me know if there's anything to agree or disagree with any of it.

The two other things that make me not willing to chalk all of anti-Doctor Carmilla sentiment up to unreliable narration and character misinterpretation are the end of this video and near the end of Lashings. The first video shows Jonny cut the music and, sounding somewhat frantic, ask Carmilla what she's going to do about being thrown out the airlock. When she doesn't respond, he backs away and accuses her of planning something. This is something that isn't attributable to unreliable narration because the premise there isn't that it's a retelling but an actual event occurring. Also, the way Jonny is on edge, expecting her to do something but not knowing what/when and having to just kind of act like it's fine really makes me read it as a bad relationship for him. The end of the Lashings performance shows Nastya stressed about various other things and Doctor Carmilla coming up behind her and hugging her. Nastya visibly tenses and remains as such for the entire interaction. I've seen people argue that this was due to the aforementioned various other things, and it could very much be that! This is definitely my least compelling piece of evidence. But it's worth noting that Doctor Carmilla doesn't back off from the hug and remains sort of in Nastya's face until Nastya steps away. The situation is either Nastya being generally uncomfortable with physical contact at that moment (or in general) and Carmilla not caring, or Nastya being distrustful of her in general. Either way doesn't reflect well on their relationship.

None of this is to say that I think she's trying to cause them harm. She does see them as her kids, in her own way. The only other close relationship she had that I'm aware of is Lorelai (please let me know if you have any more information on this! I'm always open to corrections) and that wasn't exactly healthy. She could very well not know any other way to treat them, and I really do think she meant well. The problem with meaning well is that is doesn't change the ramifications of your actions. The best of intentions don't change the fact that you hurt people. This is, in my opinion, especially prominent in parental figures, which she is.

That is all about her as a person, though. As a character? She's fantastic. Trans lesbian vampire scientist with dubious ethics? Great!!! And all of the things I just talked about that make me dislike her as a person make me love her as a character. That disparity is what makes it really hard to answer the poll I linked at the beginning, because holy fuck morality switch but I love her as a character

Tags that inspired this under the cut

[kandisheek]

FIC REC WEEK 29 - SOULMATES

SERIES: The Importance of Dynamics by haemodye

Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: M Words: 50,372 Tags: A/B/O, Forced Bonding, Angst

Summary: A soulmate a/b/o AU with Austenian influences. Includes mutual pining, the perils of social mores, and a lot of misunderstandings.

Reasons why I love it: This series isn't finished yet, but I couldn't help myself, I HAD to rec this one. From the first fic I was completely emotionally invested, I mean – the angst, the glorious angst! It's so good! I love everything about this one, so I hope you give it a shot! Since the last fic isn't finished as of now, I won't include it here, but just know that there is even more gloriousness than I'm mentioning in this rec.

This series consists of:

the groundwork of disapprobation

Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: T Words: 1,517 Tags: Misunderstandings, Pre-Slash, Light Angst

Summary: Steve and Tony don't touch skin to skin until their first handshake at Bethesda Fountain. There, in front of Bruce and SHIELD and everyone, they discover that they're soulmates. Neither of them quite know how to feel about this development.

Reasons why I love it: Right from the start, it's misunderstandings galore. I love how haemodye leads us into the conflict, especially because I can totally understand Tony's reasoning in light of his total lack of self-worth. The first time I read this, I couldn't wait to see how it continues, and I bet it'll be the same for you, so I hope you check it out!

the inconsistency of all human characters

Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: T Words: 3,749 Tags: Touch-Starved, Steve Feels, Daydreaming

Summary: Steve knows Tony's not ready to complete their bond. He understands why. But that doesn't prevent him from aching to touch his soulmate every waking minute.

Reasons why I love it: I really, really love the insight into how much Steve is struggling to adjust to the social norms of the 21st century here. The A/B/O dynamics are really interesting, and Steve's almost desperate attempts to be closer to Tony are as sweet as they are heart-breaking. I love this one so much, and I hope you check it out!

I have faults enough

Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: T Words: 6,888 Tags: Tony Stark Feels, Infidelity (sort of), Unreliable Narrator

Summary: Tony's handling being soul bonded to an old-fashioned alpha who can't stand him about as well as you'd expect.

Reasons why I love it: Oh Tony, you are so blinded by your insecurities that it makes me physically hurt. Poor Steve, he has no idea just how much Tony is misinterpreting every one of his actions, and how much deeper he is inadvertently digging the hole. This fic hurts so good, it's amazing.

how insufficient were all my pretensions

Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: M Words: 19,851 Tags: Catholic Steve, Intersex Tony, Misunderstandings

Summary: Steve is doing his best to adjust to both the future and having a soulmate that is unlike anyone he's ever met. Tony is doing his best to cope with his deteriorating mental health and adjust to having a soulmate that's still unlearning the gender and sexuality politics of 1940. Bruce just wants his stupid friends to kiss and make up. Sometimes your best just isn't good enough.

Reasons why I love it: Oh my god, the Steve feels in this are enough to make me cry. He's so pained and troubled by not just his relationship with Tony but his place in this century. I just want to give him a hug, and oh my god, Tony, please just – I don't even know, I want to shake him and hug him at the same time. This whole series just gets me so emotional, and I want all the happy endings for them. Come and follow along to suffer with me, if you haven't read this already!

[tremendouskoalachild]

trials of the jedi chapter 2 reactions:

(thank you Charles for teaching me the word cancellarial)

Regulations in the Republic Defense Coalition are more like suggestions,

this book is so memey? or maybe the beginning is? or maybe my brain is rotten by the internet? but i'm having a great time

neat callback to the Eriduans putting down Kassav lol

is it just me or is there a minor conflict with the Mask of Fear book that came out earlier this year? when Mon muses that the Senate pods are a relatively recent innovation as of the prequels? or did i misinterpret either that passage or the look of the Senate chamber in high republic books

i'm just gonna say it, the Koorivar design is stupid looking even for star wars aliens. but i like the opportunity for horn innuendos. yeah Lina i wonder how he gets his horn so shiny

Marchion films himself shirtless in tight leather pants and sends it to the government? that's so Marchion

also i half-remember him using the patterns tattooed on his chest as a secret key nobody can discover without actually coming face-to-face with him. i don't think that works if you then send thirst traps with your shirt off to your enemies. i guess he doesn't need it anymore

i haven't read/listened to Tempest Breaker but from what i've heard i'm assuming he got stabbed in that right before this. but probably not right right before because the twins were in the previous chapter and i'm pretty sure they're in the audio drama too. i know nothing i guess

during this chapter Lina Soh starts referring to Marchion exclusively by his first name in the narration. Elzar (somewhat understandably) and Marchion (infuriatingly) both call her Lina. Elzar also calls him Marchion. everyone so casual in this chapter!

we now know the beginning of TOTJ is only several weeks after the end of TOTF. i wonder whether the timeline will cohere by the end because phase 3 has been all over the place tbh

[evelhak]

Hey Eve!

Wanted to drop a few words for that “3 things in others writing that you like”.

I haven’t read the bulk of ToT yet but I think I’ve read enough of it and its universe’s works to be able to offer my opinion.

I honestly admire how progressively in character you make the canon characters, not only for the moments adjacent to the canon events, but you develop and ‘age’ them in a way that feels so organic that nothing feels out of place, or appeared out of nowhere. And how you sprinkle them with your own flavor that adds a certain angle that wasn’t there but was added with such care that makes complete sense.

I love how you can spin a tired trope in a way that makes you go ‘huh, this is unexpected’, and proceed to enjoy the smut that feels like luxurious velvet cushion but it’s between old friends so the sheen is gone, it’s seen better days, yet now perfectly adjusted to your body, and it all just clicks. And it’s a small piece but you pack it with atmosphere thru characters in a way that portrays a full picture with backgrounds and tiny pieces of lore that seem irrelevant but then come together.

And this brings me to my last point is the way you craft the narration. It kinda reminds me of big oil paintings where when you come close, you get lost in the amount of tiny strokes, the way how they at times seem irrelevant, or disconnected, but when you take a few step back, all of it comes together in the final piece.  The things you mention or the way characters act can stay with you, and then you circle, or rather spiral it back and it all makes perfect sense.

And lastly, I truly cherish the insights you provide as a writer when you read others works. You have a beautiful brain, and it sees such things that even authors themselves didn’t notice, and I think it takes a trained, skilled and loving eye to see those things. And by loving I mean the love of the craft of writing itself, so that you enjoy it many ways, as a reader and a writer, and help others to do so.

Thanks a lot for being who you are, and sharing your works, and helping others to get better, or just share thoughts about characters, themes, headcanons, etc. You definitely enrich every fandom you participate in, and it’s a joy to have you around, and I cherish our friendship a lot. ^_^

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Holy shit fuck I'm way too emotional for this right now, but at the same time it came at the perfect time, because my book is about to go to print like, tomorrow, or the day after tomorrow?? Which is the point where I always feel like a total utter hack, because I keep obsessively proofreading my text with a magnifying glass (and I STILL never catch all the mistakes and weird shit and slight contradictions) and right now I feel like I made a major mistake in putting my worst story first in this collection because why would anyone read beyond it, no one's going to reach the stuff that might have a little bit going for it in comparison.

*Takes a deep breath* But this is just a mandatory low point in the process. Sucks, because it will probably take a year or so for it to wear off after such close and obsessive editing, for me to be able to see my original idea and why I wrote it, again. I just have to trust past me right now, which isn't always easy. I'm too familiar with the text at this point. Too close to see it.

But this is why what you said about the oil painting hit so fucking hard right now, and gave me such peace of mind, thank you so much. 😭😭

(Btw I can't unsee how ToT is a crying face now. It's crying with me.)

How did you manage to tell me that I succeeded in all of those things I wanted to do in my fics, like they come off how I actually intended them?? The nuance is detectable?? That is so precious to me I don't know how I should be. I don't know why, but maybe I just have a chronic fear that nothing I write comes off like I intended. Yeah I guess it's from being misinterpreted too much in my life hahaha. I'm sorry I'm such a mess right now, but seriously your words here are not only the best thing I could hear on a normal day, it's really grounding to me right now in a time of need.

ALSO CHOOSING THE WORD SPIRAL rather than circle how on earth could you get me so accurately. That's exactly the point. Jhdsdhlljg. You're a gem.

Thank you so much. 🩵 I never could have seen this much love coming my way tonight.

Pretty much me right now:

In a positive way, obviously.

Huh. I guess I really don't feel so insecure right now. Like, I may not need to go to bed feeling like "my book is shit but I'm not going to back down". Maybe it's not shit. Maybe some good things that you see in my fics, will also reach someone in my original stories.

I feel like you poured me a bath of honey. Thank YOU for being such a wonderful friend and a deeply thoughtful person.

[takeariskao3]

I also read it and what striked me the most was ginny saying harry treated her like an afterthought and then the riddle in her mind says he always treated her well. low blow. reminds me of that discussion in your blog recently, about how people write harry being really dismissive of her feelings/treating her like a prize. I hated the last scene in dh when instead of going to ginny he 1. had a scene with luna 2. looked primarily for ron/hermione.

it was like...wow...you don't really care about her at all isn't it. rest assured I love harry, im just in the mood of defending ginny today

in that fic specifically, i do think there is a level of … unreliable narrating (?) happening with ginny right now. HOWEVER that doesn’t mean she’s misinterpreting harry’s attempt at connection as polite obligation. he flat out admits “sometimes it’s like i don’t know how to talk to you.” and that’s GUT WRENCHING. and i think there’s a couple of ways it could go but i don’t want to guess and be disappointed.

and i think—generally speaking—when it comes to harry’s intentions concerning ginny and him setting her aside vs actively seeking her out, it’s very much up to interpretation. and i’m probably more forgiving than most when we actually sit down and think it through because i like to think harry’s lack of communication comes from a place of not wanting to do something wrong and somehow mess things up. he doesn’t want to pop the bubble that keeps them from living in reality when they’re with each other. because reality hasn’t been kind to him, and he wants to keep what he has with ginny as far away from reality as possible out of fear that it will end.

that was a tangent sorry WE’RE DEFENDING GINNY TONIGHT

our girl deserves—NAY, SHE DEMANDS nothing less than first choice. she’s not sticking around if she’s playing second fiddle. she’s not gonna dawdle until someone finally decides she’s worth their time and effort. even mr hjp himself.

she’s not going to go gentle into that good night, she’s gonna be a total bitch about it! and we love her for that!!

[melon-mastermind]

Kafka and Trailblazer

I think as the game progresses, more and more people need to realize that Trailblazer and Kafka are not really written as a mother and her child. I can understand the confusion, seeing as I used to feel this way too, but some of you must not have finished the companion mission “Letter from a Strange Woman,” or misinterpreted it.

Since photos seem to grab people's attention the most, this is a photo that Kafka can send to Trailblazer in order to confirm that it is her who is messaging them.

The main focus of this image is what you think it is. You aren't being gross for noticing it. It's literally the focus of this image. You see only a fraction of Kafka's face, but can see everything underneath it. This is not something that a parental figure would—or should—send you. The act of sending images like this is not viewed as platonic.

Secondly, a common misconception is that Trailblazer is made of Kafka's DNA due to what she says in Truth and Lies, but this has been confirmed to be the lie. The truth is this:

"One day, Elio handed you over to me. He said that if things continued to transpire according to the future possibility he foresaw, you would eventually change me and I would change you.

In other words, you and I are each other's destiny.”

The phrasing of Kafka's last line isn't quite platonic either. If you think of the phrase by itself, and not in relation to Kafka and Trailblazer, you'll likely think of a couple more than a parental figure and their child—adoptive or not. There's so many romantic quotes out there that have something to do with destiny, and although destiny can be viewed platonically, as in you are destined to befriend someone, that doesn't seem fitting for Kafka and Trailblazer's relationship.

Additionally, after fighting Yanqing, Blade will come to thank Trailblazer, mentioning their old relationship with Kafka.

“You once followed Kafka, didn't you? There was a time when she was on a mission — you were next to her. I remember.”

In order for Trailblazer to have been on a mission with Kafka, Kafka would have to see them as an equal, or at least trust Trailblazer not to get hurt, even when she did her best to keep them alive. This trust can be hard to obtain in parent-child relationships, since it's typically a parental instinct to make your child avoid danger in the first place. For Blade to be involved, it was obviously a bigger mission too.

Since Trailblazer's memories would be erased, I don't think it's crazy to believe that Kafka really did just want to spend time with them in some way.

Later, in “Luofu Myths: Haunted House,” Trailblazer will encounter a wanted poster of Kafka in a seemingly haunted house. One of their first thoughts can be that she is beautiful, to which the narrator will confirm, but say that now is not the time to be saying such things. Immediately pointing out someone's beauty doesn't feel platonic, not when Trailblazer knows who Kafka is, and not when Trailblazer has been known to flirt with other characters through such compliments.

Things can be seen a lot earlier too, like in "Stars Sun, Prescience Sprung,” where Trailblazer finishes finding clues. When March 7th voices that Kafka is probably loving the chase, Trailblazer can say that she sure is a Stellaron Hunter, to which March 7th will reply:

“Ugh, why don't you go and marry her, huh?”

Even if March 7th doesn't know the relationship that Trailblazer and Kafka share, it would be in really poor taste to include this line if their relationship was that of a parent and a child.

Now, I personally don't ship Kafka and Trailblazer, but I really don't want people to be so surprised if Kafka and Trailblazer's relationship gears towards something romantic. They have to change each other, and it seems like the threat of losing Trailblazer will be what let's Kafka finally feel fear.

If you acknowledged my previous points but still want Trailblazer to have a mother figure, Himeko is right there, and she's amazing. You'll probably get the angst you crave too, if you know anything about the previous games.