#don’t google the lyrics it will hurt more :)

[k-ky]

后来我总算学会了如何去爱，

可惜你早已远去消失在人海。

后来终于在眼泪中明白，

有些人一旦错过就不再。

[starlightnorris]

tuesdays - charles leclerc

word count: 1.2k

warnings: some french using google translate but not a lot

lyrics from tuesday by jake scott <3

flashbacks in italics

Two years this summer I knew it from the day I saw her We were gonna be together

"deux ans," charles says as he looks at you, a tone of disbelief in his voice. he knew from the moment he met you that he wanted a future with you, but to be here two years later was mind-blowing to him. “happy anniversary, mon amour.” his words are quiet and his fingers mindlessly trace over your skin, bringing warmth to you.

“can you believe it?” you ask, a soft chuckle leaving your lips. thinking back to when you had first met, how you were still in a relationship and charles did everything to make it known that he liked you but never crossing the line because it wouldn’t be fair to your boyfriend.

“charles, i’m sorry but i’m in a relationship,” you said, a nervous chuckle leaving your lips. you appreciated his attention, and if you were being honest with yourself, the feelings between you and your boyfriend seemed to be drifting away, something that you had never pictured happening before. you accounted the change to the chaos in both of your lives, he had recently started a new job and you were finishing up university, so the two of you were just incredibly busy at the moment. but you knew it was more than that.

so you did the thing you knew what you had to do. you ended the relationship, and after the conversation, you realized the feelings were more mutual than you thought. and while you didn’t find it to be fair to move on so quickly, you didn’t want your moment with charles to pass, so you contacted him a week later, thinking it wouldn’t hurt to see where it led.

“remember when you broke up with your ex-boyfriend so you could be with me?” charles asks, and you let out a disbelieving laugh at his words.

“it wasn’t exactly because of you, leclerc,” you say, a giggle escaping your lips as he pokes your side. “but i’m glad it happened.”

That's why I'm here to see her She doesn't know I'm in Virginia But I know she's mine forever

So I'm askin' for your blessin' And maybe just one lesson He said, "27 years, and here's my takeaway"

“charles, it’s good to see you,” your dad says, shaking his hand.

“it’s good to see you, sir,” charles says, and his heart is racing as his prepared speech runs through his mind. he’d been preparing for this moment for weeks now, but really it’s been years at this point. he’s known for a while now that he wanted to marry you, but now that he’s here to ask your father for his blessing, all the rehearsed words have just left his mind.

“sir, i want to ask y/n to marry me,” he says, the words rushing out of him, all the careful thought out words leaving his mouth in one jumbled sentence. “i came to ask for your blessing, but even if you don’t approve, i know i want to spend the rest of my life with her.”

charles’ eyes widen as he realizes what he said and he says, “i’m sorry, sir, that was incredibly rude. i respect your opinion very much, sir, but i love your daughter and will do anything i can to spend the rest of my life with her.”

your dad looks at him was an amused look, recognizing the younger man’s love for you, having felt similarly for your mother for countless years now. “you have my blessing, charles. just continue to treat her right if you know what’s good for yourself.”

“thank you, sir, i promise i will,” charles says, emotions flooding his mind.

“welcome to the family, son.”

It's not just picture perfect dancing in a white dress

“our first dance as husband and wife,” charles whispers as the two of you dance around, your family and friends watching the two of you. it had been the most perfect day, getting to marry the man you had grown to love so much. and being here with him now, getting to officially call him your husband… the feeling was unmeasurable.

“i can’t believe we’re actually married,” you say, shaking your head with a soft laugh.

“well believe it, mrs. leclerc,” he says softly, pressing a soft kiss to your lips which elicits a cheer from the people around you.

It's not just rainy days when nothing stops the fighting

“i’m not in the mood for this conversation, charles,” you say, an exasperated sigh leaving your lips. “i’m tired and i don’t want to deal with whatever bullshit excuse you come up with now.”

“y/n, i’ve been working! i am barely here during the season, you can’t expect me to want to clean around the house during the short time i’m here,” he yells, making you flinch.

“that’s the problem, charles! you’re never here but when you are, you make the house a fucking mess and then expect me to be the one to clean it.” you run a frustrated hand over your face, feeling the tears welling in your eyes. you quickly try to blink them away, but charles catches the change in your demeanor, quickly moving over to you.

“mon ange,” he whispers softly, using the pad of his thumb to wipe away a tear that had escaped. you wanted to move away from his touch, but instead you leaned into it, a soft sigh leaving your lips. “i’m sorry, i’m just frustrated with the team and not winning, but that’s no excuse for me to treat you like this.”

“it’s okay, charles.”

“no, amour, it’s not,” he says, gently pulling you into his arms. “i will clean up first thing in the morning, but can i just hold you right now? i think we both need that.”

you nod wordlessly, leaning into his hold. marriage was hard and the demands of charles’ job had taken it’s toll on the relationship at times, but you both knew that these lows were worth fighting through, because at the end of the day, you knew that you were soulmates.  

It's not just highs and lows, and champagne toast I've come to know that love's not only the best days Or the worst days Love is the Tuesdays Yeah, love is the Tuesdays

“good morning, amour,” charles says softly, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead before pulling you closer to him. “i missed you.”

“you’ve been home all week, char,” you say with a laugh, pressing a soft kiss to his shoulder.

“i know, but i still missed you, i missed just waking up with you on a day where we don’t have anything to do.” his eyes travel to your lips and he slowly moves to kiss you, his hand going behind your neck to pull you closer. “i miss these moments when I’m away.” he continues to press soft kisses to your lips, and a giggle falls from your lips.

you loved these days more than anything. a day that it was just the two of you, nothing planned, just getting to spend time together. “i love you,” you whisper against his lips, feeling him smile as he hears your words.

sorry this was kinda all over the place

[kentuckyfriedmegumi]

i analyzed the songs that gege akutami assigned to the first year trio and i how i think they relate to their characters

for the record, we are talking about the songs that gege had said he thinks would be the theme songs for each member of the trio (like island in the sun for megumi)

this was a 20 page document in word, hope you enjoy more of my ramblings...

YUJI’S SONG 1: HEART NI HI WO TSUKETE by 9MM PARABELLUM BULLET

I think what really makes Yuji’s song so beautiful is the way that it highlights two people trying to heal and overcome some sort of trauma. They are wondering if they will be able to fight through and it keep fighting while finding comfort in each other.

The narrator is addressing someone in pain who makes a lot of self-destructive decisions. This is inherently interesting because we know that Megumi has a tendency to look down on himself and not see the value in his life. This is especially true in the manga and specifically in the chapter where Yuji tries to communicate with Megumi, but Megumi tells him that he gives up.

But the narrator is in just as much pain. They are HURTING and they cannot bear it alone. THIS IS SUPER INTERESTING BECAUSE OF CHAPTER 266 WHERE YUJI TELLS MEGUMI “It’s lonely without you, Fushiguro”!!!! Mind you, this was chosen as his song be Gege a longgg time ago.

In this part of the song, we see that the narrator and the person they are speaking to have found a comfort in each other, but it also leaves them feeling a bit empty. Neither of them have fully healed yet and they are far from that path in the light that they are trying so desperately to get to. But the narrator still cannot stand being alone. While this isn’t necessarily related to Yuji or Megumi, it still parallels Yuji’s desire for companionship after everything that has happened and what he has gone through.

This is the end of the song, and it’s especially interesting because we’re seeing repeat themes with the “don’t turn to ashes” and themes of burning and fire. Fire in media can represent a lot of things, but in this song I think it’s meant to represent purging. The narrator is begging this person to please keep going, please keep standing by their side, don’t let your trauma consume you.

And then there’s this last line, a question of whether or not the narrator and the unknown person will be able to find love and comfort in each other, or will their pain consume them and burn them from the inside out. We know that JJK touches a lot on themes of love, romantic and platonic arguments being set aside right now. This last line ties in directly with that theme while also calling back to the pain that these two people are feeling.

YUJI’S SONG 2: ITSUKA DOKOKA DE by KUCHIRORO

I actually had first discovered the wrong song with the same name and realized that the song that’s meant to be Yuji’s is like 13 minutes long. I will not include the lyrics, but I will highlight and quote the ones that I find tie in with Yuji’s character. This song also switches from first to third POV. In this analysis, I am only addressing the first person POV.

This song overall seems to be a sort of conversation that the narrator is having with an unknown person. There is mentions of belief, love, and a desire for a simple, mundane life. There is also a lot of counting in this song, having to do with time and time running out or time flying by.  

Wow this is going to be very hard, I am struggling with Google Translate here. From what I am picking up, it seems that the narrator wishes for love, but isn’t sure what that looks like, all the while they feel that time is running out. I think with Yuji, this could relate to his character in that he wants to surround himself with good people, people that he loves and people who love him, but he feels like he doesn’t have time. This is most likely in part due to his execution.

In this part, it seems that the narrator is putting a lot of pressure on themselves, as they struggle to do their best. Yuji is constantly in a state of growth ever since the beginning of the series where he says that he wants to get stronger, especially after the detention center. “I met someone who was doing it” may even be hinting at Megumi or someone else that Yuji heavily admires. Skipping over the third POV stuff, these lyrics also hint that the narrator just wants to live a mundane life, maybe even with someone as the “I’m thinking of you, you dream of me” lyric.

The narrator is alone at night and we see a lot of references to time and its passage. “Am I moving forward?” The narrator feels stuck, lost in their thoughts and the only thing that grounds them is the thought of seeing someone soon and every single day after that. While this isn’t exactly related to Yuji, I think it’s interesting to note their worry about time running out and the only thing that is keeping them from spiraling is companionship.

MEGUMI’S SONG 1: HAKUJITSUMU by UCHUJIN

In this song, the narrator not only speaks about wanting to save someone, but also battling with their own internal struggles as they try to navigate their trauma. This is really cool because it can be applied to Megumi’s relationship with Yuji and his relationship with Tsumiki—both being people that Megumi has compared time and time again.

These lyrics immediately make me think of Megumi’s relationship with Tsumiki. We see him admire the goodness in her throughout the series and he’s often remembering her with a smile. Not to mention “there’s always an exit somewhere” which reminds me of his revealed desire to create a life away from jujutsu sorcerer where Tsumiki isn’t threatened by the dangers of his word. Or, comparatively, this could also apply to Yuji and their first time saving each other. Megumi decides that he is worth saving and is willing to go against his rules and morals to do so.

Here we see the narrator’s internal struggles and their own discomfort with themselves. This is related to Megumi as we see that he struggles with his self-worth and seeing the value in his life.

These lyrics first made me think that the narrator was giving up and giving into hopelessness, but upon reading it further, I think that this is actually where we start to see a push back. There’s a fight that’s coming through and leading up to the rest of the song, which we can see with “you are no longer inside me.” In my mind, this is being said to Sukuna by Megumi.

The finale of this song is a final banishment and an honest “screw you” to the darkness that is plaguing the narrator. This was first touched on in the second and third paragraphs (stanzas?) and we see now that the narrator has finally overcome it and does not want anything more to do with it. This could be directly related Megumi’s internal struggles with his own value that he’s placed upon himself or with Sukuna. You decide.

MEGUMI’S SONG 2: ISLAND IN THE SUN by WEEZER

This one is probably the most analyzed that I’ve seen since it’s in English and is a somewhat well-known song. This song is about a narrator and their desire to run away with someone and live a peaceful life, away from their troubles so they will “never feel bad anymore.” I think once again, this is so applicable to both Tsumiki and with Yuji, ESPECIALLY after 266.

The narrator’s desire to better understand the person they’re addressing, along with their thoughts and feelings, is really interesting to me because we see that Megumi doesn’t quite understand his sister or Yuji. He respects and admires them and appreciates their ability to see the goodness in the world, but he has such contrasting views that he just doesn’t get it. We see him even refer to Yuji’s ideas as naïve. But there’s a desire to learn and understand.

Then there’s the obvious chorus bit with a desire to live a peaceful life, one where they are together and that’s the only happiness Megumi could ask for. I will not be including the chorus after this point, since it’s pretty repetitive.

In this section of the song, we see the narrator pointing out how the person they’re referring to has little wants or needs. They have a desire to just be, as if all they need is a place to belong. This section here is what makes me think of Yuji the most.

Going back to my overall analysis, this song really is just a desire for a normal, peaceful, and happy life. One where the narrator (Megumi) and the person (Tsumiki or Yuji [or both]) they’re talking to are just able to live their life. We see in 266 that all Megumi wanted for his sister was for her to just be able to live. We also see that Yuji is the only person that he thinks truly deserves to stand alongside them.

NOBARA’S SONG 1: SEISHUN KYOSOKYOKU by SUNNY DAY SERVICE

The first song for Nobara’s selection reminds me heavily of her flashbacks with her friend in her hometown. This song is all about the desire to catch up with an old friend (maybe a lover? But we’ll say friend because as far as we know, Nobara’s relationship with her friend was strictly platonic), reminiscent of a connection that they used to have.

In this initial set up, we see how this person is feeling lonely and heartbroken. Immediately followed by “What about you? Are you doing well?”, we see that the narrator is going about their day and desires to know about this unnamed person. There’s a feeling there that they haven’t spoken in a while. There’s a desire to know what they’re up to now, what is life like for you, what funny stories do you know?

Similarly, we know that Nobara never got a chance to see Saori again after leaving for Tokyo. We know that she looks back on that time fondly, and even from Saori’s POV, we see that Nobara only cried twice in front of her—once when Fumi moved away and again later when Nobara moved away.

There’s a sense of hopelessness that you sense from the lyrics here as it seems like the narrator is only able to speculate about the person because they feel they may never meet again. There’s this desire to know how they are doing, but they are in a situation where they won’t get to know, hence “there’s nothing I can do about it.”

We know that Nobara never really wanted to go home, but she did extend an olive branch to Saori by telling her that they should all meet up in Tokyo one day. But we know with how the events of the story took place, them meeting again is unlikely.

However, there’s still a sense of hope within the narrator as they think about what their conversation would be like should they ever meet again. This is interesting since we know that Nobara thought of Saori in her last moments and we see that imagery with Saori sitting in the chair across from her.

NOBARA’S SONG 2: ANO DEPAATO by NATSUKO NISSHOKU

This song is about the desire to return to simpler time in one’s childhood as they go through the struggles in adult life. There are several references to things that you experience first as child, as well as just the simplicity of youth. This song is really tragic for Nobara because we know that she always wanted to just grow up and leave her hometown when she was younger, but she also never got to be a kid by the time she became a sorcerer.

The first part of this song is calling back to a place the narrative used to frequent as a kid, and how they would look to the top of the building and never knew what resided up there. It wasn’t until they were older when they finally learned that it was a beer and coffee shop, whereas before they only knew it to be a store and a place to get soft serve ice cream.

We then learn that now, years later, that building will be gone and the narrator finally learns the nature of the rooftop shop. However, they dismiss the “bitter taste of adulthood” and instead turn back to ice cream, like they did in their childhood.

I think making this song Nobara’s theme song is what makes her death in the series a lot more tragic. We know that she is a kid, and maybe she has childlike qualities, but at the end of the day she is a jujutsu sorcerer who must be able to fight and face death. But there’s this desire for more mundane things. We know that she became a sorcerer because she wanted to live in Tokyo. We know that she loves trending things, shopping, and even trying trendy foods.

This part is about returning to your roots, despite your experiences as you grow and change. This makes me think about how Nobara last thought of her friendship with Saori and her childhood, and that no matter what, there would always be that part of them within her, even if she moved away and never saw her again.

However, in the end we know that they are still living separate lives away from that department store and their childhood memories. This song leaves with a bit of a sad ending, highlighting that store will no longer be there anymore. So, no matter how much the narrator wishes to go back and relive those memories, they will never be able to because that building will be gone.

[spaceshipellie]

hi erin cutie angel baby ♡૮₍ ˃ ⤙ ˂ ₎ა

can I req for Abby + fluff and angst, like hurt/comfort + modern au, maybe like a high school or uni setting with the lyric

“and home’s not home unless you’re there”

fuck I love ethel cain, she is a creative and lyrical genius

“and home’s not home unless you’re there”

pairing: abby x reader

summary/warnings: modern university au, fluff, hurt/comfort, toxic friends

hi sugar darling, thank you for the req ♡ she is a genius!!

being at university was a breath of fresh air. it was the first time in your life you’d ever felt happy enough to truly be yourself. you felt harsh admitting it but your friends back home never seemed to really understand you and what you wanted out of life. you’d known them for years and over that time it seemed that they had all stayed close but now only spoke to you when they wanted to mooch off of your generous nature. and you being the people pleaser that you were, gave in to them more often than you wanted to admit. the life you had made for yourself at university felt more like home than your actual hometown ever had, and more specifically, she did.

you had been head over heels in love with abby ever since she’d flashed you her winning smile from across the room at a house party about eight months ago. she had waltz into your life with so much unexpected charm and warmth, it really showed you that there was more to life than making yourself amendable for others.

on this particular day, however, you’d been receiving messages all day from these friends and it had knocked you into a pretty bad mood. it was your one of their birthdays and you had suggested a spa weekend which everyone thought was a great idea but now, no one was helping to organise anything. they expected you to be in charge of booking it, driving everyone there, picking up the cake, and even though you had asked twice, half of them hadn’t transferred you the money for their share yet and it was this weekend. you were exhausted by it all and wished you’d never even bothered to suggest anything. the worst part was, the situation seemed to be causing some friction between you and abby. nothing major but you were so consumed with trying to do everything perfectly and had spent so much time anxiously planning out this birthday thing that you had barely spoken to her and when you had, you’d been quite short and inattentive.

later that day, you were sat at your desk, face in your phone, furiously flicking between the group chat and google. abby was leaning against the headboard of your bed reading. well, half reading, half looking over at your frowning face.

“do you wanna watch a movie?” she asked.

“mm maybe,” you responded, half-heartedly.

“or go for a walk and get a coffee? it’s really sunny out.”

“yeah.” again, your tone was as unenthusiastic as could be, eyes still glued to the bright screen like you were being brainwashed.

abby slammed her book shut and sighed, shifting down so her head hit the pillow.

“what’s wrong?” you asked.

“oh you’re listening to me now?”

you looked up at her. “what?”

“you’ve been ignoring me for…well, days. honestly how much more planning does this weekend need?”

“it’s not my fault they’re making me do everything,” you said defensively.

“you don’t have to, you know. tell them to do some of it, and have they even paid you?”

“no… but i can’t i’m already doing it now, it’s fine.”

“it’s not though. they’re walking all over you.”

“abby, i’m already super stressed about it i don’t need you making it worse.”

she propelled herself up at your frantic tone and stood behind you, placing her hands on your tense shoulders to start lightly massaging them.

“i’m sorry for stressing you, i understand it’s difficult but they shouldn’t treat you like that. it’s wrong, friends aren’t supposed to treat you like that.”

when she noticed you not relaxing into her touch like you normally would she bent down to press a kiss to your temple.

“maybe put the phone down for a bit, yeah? you can always reply later after you’ve had some time away from it.”

you slowly nodded, knowing she was right and placed your phone on the desk. you stood up and faced her, her hands now rubbing your arms comfortingly. you took one look at her sympathetic eyes and started to tear up.

“sweetheart,” abby cooed, hugging you tightly whilst you sobbed into her chest.

“i hate it, abs.”

she started rubbing your back with her warm hand. it pained her to see you like this. she loved you so much and wanted to make sure you were always happy. even though she knew that was impossible, she’d be damned if that would stop her from trying.

“come here,” she said softly as she removed one arm from you to fluff up the pillows, gesturing for you to lie down. you both climbed onto the bed and she immediately bundled you up in her arms again.

“you’ve done more than enough. i truly admire how sweet and caring you are about people,” she kissed your head, “but people should reciprocate the same kindness for you and if they don’t, you shouldn’t feel so obligated to go to those lengths for them.”

“i know, i just don’t want to let them down.”

“you won’t. despite everything, i hope you have a nice weekend, but if you need to call me at any point, do so. please? if you need picking up even, i’m there, okay?”

you nodded against her chest and held her tighter. “okay.”

“thank you. i love you, angel.”

“love you too, abs. thank you.”

[xeenybobean]

"Feelings."

Pavitr Prabhakar x Reader

Prompt from anonymous on google forms: Y/N returns to their hometown and realizes they still like Pavitr. 

Word Count: 3k

Tags: @bluenotes75

Note: To be honest when I thought about writing this I instantly thought about the little mermaid's original back story where the prince falls in love with another girl and the little mermaid was tasked to kill him to stay human, if she couldn’t she’d remain a mermaid forever, but since she loved the prince so much she couldn’t bare to do it so she jumped into the ocean. To me, I feel like the lyrics of the song just match this whole idea about feelings and Pavitr doesn’t feel the same way. 

Lowkey don't see barely any stories on my lovely sweetheart darling Pavitr so here you go, my baby! :)

Summary: you've liked the cute boy Pavitr for quite some time ever since you guys became friends you instantly started to like him with his wide smile, his warm positive energy, and the way his family accepted you into their family with open arms just made it better. Having tea time with Pavitr and his aunt just made your day. You thought you guys had something serious together, but you couldn’t have been more wrong than you’ve ever been in your whole life. Soon your heart was crushed you found out you were moving and that you might not ever see the man you love ever again..the day you left was heartbreaking for both you and Pavitr, he was heartbroken and didn’t want to let you go, he loved your company and you were his only friend from his universe, he couldn’t bare to lose you. But yet you slipped through his fingertips like quicksand... 

You never thought you’d come back to your hometown until it was summertime, just to be heartbroken once more like the night you left just to come back to your hometown to see the one you love with someone else... 

⚠Warning!!⚠: Sadness |Lots of angst|Sadly no fluff |Moving on to some type of closure?|Maybe? I’m not sure lol|

How long has it been since you left your hometown? The man you loved to the moon and back? It's been 4 years. Ever since your parents got a new job and you got accepted in the most prestige school ever and in those 4 years you’ve learned proper etiquette, manners, ways to respond to certain situations, learning to correct your posture, learning the difference between a desert spoon and a soup spoon. And throughout all those 4 years you’ve changed from a carefree person to a more strict and proper young lady but in those 5 years there was only one thing and one thing only that made you push harder towards your goals, it was him. 

Pavitr..he made your heart race, he made you, you,  he was hurt the other half, well you’d like to think of it that way at least. The night you left just tore a hole in your heart as you hugged your best friend and your long-time crush as he cried into your shoulder holding you as close as he could ever hold anyone. He begged over and over again begging you to stay with him, that you needed to stay, he offered you to stay at his parent's place but you couldn’t accept, not because you didn’t want to but because your parents didn’t want you to stay here in the first place. 

“Please don’t go N/N” you heard your best friend begging you to stay as his hold squeezed around your body. You didn’t know what to do o say, your words were stuck in your throat as they grew dry all you did was hold your best friend not knowing when you could ever see him again. Here is his voice. Seeing his smile. Feeling his touch. This was the final time you’d be seeing all those things and hearing all those things. 

That night still haunts you to this day as you walked out of the train station with a language in your hand as you dragged it off the train as began walking to find the nearest cab. You were finally home. After 4 long years, you couldn’t wait to see him. After so long you missed playing with his hair, holding him close, seeing him smile, laughing with him, smiling with him, and heck even talking to him!! Even though you were now proper you knew you could loosen up all those 4 years of hard work in one second when you saw him. 

You scrolled through your phone through your old texts with Pavitr and you found the address he sent you a while ago. You walked out of the crowded station and called for a taxi cab and to your surprise one came right away, something was looking up you could feel it in your stomach as butterflies emerged from them filling your body with joy and excitement.

The only reason you were back home in the first place was that you had a 6-month break and you couldn’t wait to spend it with your best friend who was still a crush you’d longed to see for so long.. Even though you both texted here and there it wasn’t the same... The taxi driver took your leagues as you sit in the back seat of the fresh-smelling cab handing him the addresses and he began to drive and of course traffic. But you couldn’t help but smile you missed every single detail of your home town from the food, heck even the traffic that you hated the most living here made you smile! You were in such a good mood nothing could stop or change your feeling. 

You looked out the window falling in love with the city you grew up in all over again as you decided to rest your eyes to pass the time and to your surprise you were now in front of your favorite place in the whole city his home. You got out of the cab and tipped the driver as he handed you your belongings, you thanked him and bowed slightly as you quickly ran up the stairs to knock on the door only to be greeted by the woman who’d watch over you the most. 

Her eyes widened as she quickly pulled you into a huge tight hug not even letting you speak as she held you close to her pressing kisses all over your forehead. 

“Welcome back N/N! It's been so long! How was the flight huh? Did you get here safely?” she pulled away and cupped your face moving your face back and forth. 

“My you have gotten prettier over the years I see! Does Pavitr know you here? he’s going to be thrilled!” she said as she squeezed you tighter. You smiled and hugged the Pavitr’s aunt tighter as you both pulled away she quickly took your stuff. 

“It's nice to see you again aunty..” you spoke softly as you walked in taking your shoes off as your body melted with the scent of the species you’ve missed so much. You finally felt at home again as you closed the door behind you gently as Pavitr’s aunt put your stuff near the couch.

“He’s on the balcony per usual! I’m sure you know the way hm?” she said flashing you a smile as she went back to the kitchen, she knew you had a thing for her son but she couldn’t bare to tell you her son has fallen in love with the police captain's daughter Gayatri. She couldn’t bare to tell you the sad news since you knew it would crush you like a rock...

You quickly nodded as your heart began to race faster and faster with each step you took up the stairs you found yourself practically running up the apartment complex’s stairs to the main balcony where you saw the man you loved and missed the most. You smiled widely, you were going to say his name but you stopped. Your eyes grew wide as you saw him kissing a girl.

The man you loved... For the longest time even when you were apart were kissing another girl. You bit your cheek harshly as you stood a good distance between the two of them watching them. The way he stared at her. The way his hand was placed on her cheek caressing it ever so gently like she was the most precious thing in the world was what you’ve wanted all your life. You were conflicted with emotions. You've waited so long to tell him. You waited so long, 4 years for god sake just to come back to your hometown to see him kissing another girl. How you wished it was you.

You didn’t even notice the tears running down your cheeks as you touched your cheeks to wipe them gently. You didn’t know if you wanted to call out to him anymore but.. God you missed him so much. You shifted slightly causing his spider senses to go off as he turned around to see you.

His eyes grew wide as he rubbed them thinking you were just an illusion but no you were real. He quickly got up on his feet as his girlfriend Gayatri looked at him in confusion she then looked forward to seeing you. She's heard about you through Pavitr. 

“N/N?.. Is that..really you?..” he asked as he felt a lump in his throat as he started at you from a distance. You couldn’t form words all you did was cry as you opened out your arms for him widely and boy did he run.. He ran like no tomorrow..he tackled you to the cold hard ground as he cried his heart out. He was so happy to see you again. To hold you..to hear your voice. To smell your sweet scent. He’s missed everything about you.

You lost your balance when he tackled you to the ground, you instantly wrapped your arms around him hugging him tightly as you humanly possibly could as he dug a hole in your neck laughing slightly as tears rushed down his eyes as your hands made their way to his hair as you ran your fingers weakly through them. 

“I’ve missed you so damn much you have no idea how long I’ve waited to hold you again..” you mumbled softly as you felt him hugging you tighter, he didn’t care that his girlfriend saw him like this he just cared about you right now. You chuckled slightly as your tears ran down your face faster, you felt like you were in a dream. Not the best dream but you were glad to hold him so close to you all over again. 

“I’ve missed you more. I-i thought you’d never come back again..” he whispered into your ear as he looked at you and wiped your tears slightly as he pressed his forehead against yours as you both laughed, just happy to be in each other presence after years apart. Well everyone except you, boy were you crushed.

You were crying for two reasons. One because you were happy to see the man you liked for years but you were sad and crushed..like a building had fallen on you and crushed your whole heart because his heart doesn’t belong to you.

He noticed that you were still crying as he continued to wipe your tears then getting off of you and helping you up. You got up and saw his girlfriend walking to the two of you. She looked nice and had a warm smile on her face, you noticed Pavitr walking away from you to wrap his arm around his girlfriend's waist as he introduced her to you. 

“Babe this is my beast friend Y/N! The girl I told you about!” he said smiling widely at you as she did the same extending her hand out to you. God, you wanted to slap it away and run but you maintained composure and smiled weakly

“Hey, my name is Gayatri it’s nice to finally meet the girl my boyfriend has been talking about nonstop!” she said chuckling slightly as you shook her hand gently and then pulled away. You felt your stomach in knots, that was supposed to be YOU not HER, YOU. you inhaled gently and tried to put a smile on your face but god was it so hard. 

“Nice to meet you... Didn't think Pavitr could manage to pull someone as beautiful as you.” you teased slightly as the three of you laughed slightly you being the last one to stop as you looked down to the ground, Pavitr and Gayatri noticed this as she kissed his cheek telling him she’d be downstairs with his aunt. 

“It was nice meeting you Y/N” she spoke softly as she left the balcony leaving you two alone. When she left you instantly felt a pair of warm hands caressing your face making you look up. You met his warm gaze and god that was your breaking point... You couldn't help but cry as his expression turned into a worried one as he moved closer to you continuously wiping your teasers trying to calm you down. 

“Hey hey... What's wrong... Talk to me..” he said softly. Now was your chance to tell him how you felt for him after all this time..you inhaled sharply as your eyes grew red and puffy, and you bit your inner cheek harshly as you looked away from his warm gaze you’ve missed all of this time. You took a mental note and tried to hype yourself up telling yourself you could do this, this was your chance to tell him how you truly felt. Here it goes... 

“I love you,” you spoke quickly as you moved his hands away from your face, your back turning to face him as he stood there making sure he heard correctly. 

“Y-you love me N/N?..” you heard his voice and his tone sounding confused like he never thought you would ever like him, you were like a sister to him, and he never thought those moments spent with you were because you had romantic feelings towards him. He placed a hand on your shoulder gently and made you look at him and his heart broke, he could see the pain and anger in your eyes... You were a mess and you knew it. You didn’t know if you could even say another word to him without breaking down as you put your lip harshly trying to hold your tears back. 

“Yes, I love you, you idiot! Who wouldn’t love you? You are so sweet, kind, and caring, you always know how to make me laugh! Cheering me up! Being by my slide!..being you..” You looked away as you wiped your tears, his gaze fixated on you made the knot in your stomach grow, you felt like you were going to throw up right here right now. Pavitr didn’t know what to say but all he did was stare and try to process how much you loved him... He moved his hands from your shoulders to hold your face in your hands as he stared into your glossy eyes... He could tell how bad this was eating you up. 

“I love you so much... But.. but you have someone else..someone who you love and it’s not me..” You got out of his grasp and he hesitated... He wanted to hold you so bad but you slipped out of his hands like grains of sand like the night you left... He felt a knot in his stomach as he saw your back facing him. 

“She loves you..and you love her. I’m glad you are happy you deserve it, my love..” you mumbled softly as you completely broke down you needed to leave now. 

“I need to go,” you said quickly as you ran off of the balcony onto the staircases your hands gripped onto the railing to support you as you were now downstairs, Gayatri looking at you with sadness in her eyes.. She felt bad but decided to say nothing. Pavitr chased after you and watched you grabbing your luggages. No, he couldn’t lose you again. He stood in front of the door blocking it as your eyes met his. There was no way in hell he would lose you and not do anything... He refused to go down that path once more but you knew deep down you needed to get out of here..you shook your head. 

“No. I am not losing you again N/N..please.” His cheeks were stained with tears as you looked at him your heart just broke into a million pieces as you tried to pry him off of the door he wouldn’t budge..his voice was cracking as he cried, and he stared at you begging for you to stay. 

“N/N I can’t and will not lose you again. Please... I-i’m begging you.” you stared into his eyes searching them as your own grew glossier by the second... You couldn’t bare to see him like this... You caused his pain and you just couldn't live with someone you loved knowing you still had feelings for him. You knew deep down he will never love you, not in any universe were you two together..and you knew it... You were destined to love him and he was destined to love someone else...

“I’m sorry Pavitr... B-but it’s for the best. I-I’m sorry I love you with all my heart..” you said as you placed a kiss on his forehead. His eyes grew wide as he stared at you. He was about to say something but before he knew it you knocked him out with a combat technique he taught you a while back before you left your hometown. You watch him falling to the floor as his girlfriend rushed to his side.

You gathered your belongings and rushed out of the apartment tears stinging your eyes as he quickly gained consciousness once more and got out of his girlfriend's grasp as he chased after you calling out your name over and over again but nothing. He tried to grasp your hand but you were too quick to get into the cab as he watched you drive off... He lost you again...

Even though I am not happy... I'm happy to see you happy..even though it is not with me... 

[abiiors]

A FIC ABOUT TAKING CARE OF ROSS OH PLEASEEEE GIVE ME THE HURT/COMFORT AWHILE BACK I REQUESTED ABOUT COMFORTING /HIM/ INSTEAD OF THE OTHER WAY AROUND (and you wrote it and it was amazing) ITS MY FAVORITE TROPE

SORRY FOR YELLING IM JUST EXCITED!

it's quite short but it's sweet <3

you watch ross with a frown on your face. which is not how it usually goes—usually, you watch him absolutely enamoured or with a huge grin on your face. or sometimes, when you’re busy belting out the lyrics and shredding an air-guitar, you don’t even watch him at all. but today, (rather, in the last few days) the frown has been making a more and more frequent appearance. 

you know he’s been in pain and you know how much he keeps minimising it with frequent reassurances of “i’m fine,” and “you're worried over nothing.” and sure maybe you are, but you don’t like the way he keeps shaking his hand and scruntching his face in pain after every song. especially now that they’re done with most of the set with only two more songs left. 

so you sit backstage, restlessly tapping your foot and waiting for him to come back. 

fifteen more minutes, and you hear the tell-tale sounds the cheers and whoops and laughter—matty’s giggle the loudest among them all but ross is laughing along too. 

he looks perfectly fine when he comes into view. exactly like he does every day except for the hint of a blue tap peeking out from under his sleeve. well this is new—you didn’t know he had to put it on. 

“did you enjoy it love?” he asks, placing a kiss on your head and immediately makes his way to his bag. 

you mumble a non-commital yes and watch him dig through it until he finds the familiar pack of ibuprofen and looks around in search of some water. 

“ross…” you sigh, holding out a bottle of water which he takes gratefully and swallows down two pills. 

he’s oblivious to you watching him—from the way he can’t open the cap of the bottle on the first try to how he constantly flexes and unflexes his hand, almost subconsciously at this point while he jokes around with polly about something. 

so when you get a minute with him alone, you pull him aside. 

“you’re hiding it from me.” your tone is slightly accusatory which makes him frown in confusion. 

“hiding? babe, what…”

“your arm. you’re hiding the fact that it hurts to play!” you poke his arm lightly, just a graze of your finger against his wrist but ross looks away guiltily.

“i am not hiding!” he grumbles but his shoulders slump a little as he gazes at the ground. the guilt in his eyes is evident, but he's not ready to admit it fully just yet. "i just don't want you to worry, that's all. it's no big deal, honestly."

you can't help but roll your eyes at his stubbornness. "ross, you're in pain. you're wincing and fidgeting on stage. it's obvious to me, and i'm sure it's noticeable to the fans too. you’ve got a tape wrapped around it. do you honestly expect me to believe it’s because you’re “not in pain”?”

he lets out another sigh, rubbing his temple as if trying to chase away a growing headache. "i know, love. but i’m handling it, okay? i can’t exactly take a break though, can i?”

that softens you a bit—enough that you step forward and cradle his face between your hands. “i know it’s a lot at the moment… but can you let me take care of you at least? icing it can help, right?”

he nods and you make a mental note to google all the ways to lessen his pain because yes, unfortunately taking a break is not an option. 

so till then, it’s ice packs, and tapes and ibuprofen. 

“something warm helps too,” he volunteers, cheekily pulling you closer. “a bath when we get back to the hotel?”

you roll your eyes at him again, trying and failing to suppress your smile. “anything else, babe? a sexy nurse costume to go with your treatment?”

“i mean if you’re offering–ow!” he laughs at your attempts to smack his chest. 

despite the pain, you’re glad to see him back in high spirits again and finally willing to accept being taken care of. it’s not ideal—the injury, the schedule. anything really. but at least now you can properly devise a plan. 

[axel-skz]

Though I reach out my hand, there’s nobody to hold it.

Part 1

A/N: I will not lie, I cried writing this. All up in my feels and whatever. Anywho, you will hate me now… for hurting you with how this ends… and I would apologise but I’m not sorry 😆 not everything gets better, not everything ends well. Some people are genuinely temporary. Enjoy them while they last but don’t hold onto them because they will leave. One way or another. Now, song roulette time, we got sunshine. I can’t say I have listened to it much but I googled the lyric translation and bro, thats so cute 😭.

Chan messed up too much… what happens now?

You and chan had been living separately for a while. It had been so long since you talked to each oher. Chan tried calling a couple times but even he knew there was no way of redeeming himself. There wasn’t really much to say now. The trust was gone.

The other guys seemed to find out very soon that you guys had a fight because it only took 2 days for them to start spamming you with apologies.

You couldn’t describe the amount of pain you were in. Not only to find out what chan had actually thought of you all this time… but the boys too?

They had warned him of you? How the hell were you supposed to come back from that? What was so bad about you that they all had wanted you gone so bad? That they needed to pass out warnings?

Now they were apologising. Whats the point of apologising now? What could they even say? ‘Sorry, you suck and we noticed’ or ‘we want the best for chan and… you arent even close.’

You had tried your best with them. You cared for them so much and to your face, they had been caring too. There were times where you felt you had no one but them. They were so important to you. It ripped everything in you to shreds even thinking about how wrong you were.

You couldn’t afford to take time off work, you had used your savings to get a new apartment. It was a miserable existence. Every day blurred together and any time you were home, you wouldn’t leave your bed. Any holidays or days off were spent getting all the tears out so that when you did re-enter civilisation the next day, you wouldn’t fall apart.

Days passed, then weeks, then months… you slowly got better, life started to move again. Little things made you happy again… but for a little while, smiling about those little things made you cry. He would call you immature in your head. Again and again until you could hear ringing in your ears and the tears wouldn’t stop.

You had very little confidence in yourself growing up. It was a hard thing to have and you had been doing so great. Self love. What a freeing concept?

It was all gone for a while. Not a speck of it in sight.

Until slowly, you go it back. Slowly, you appreciated yourself. Started liking how simple things made you light up. You got in touch with old friends and your life started to feel whole again. Everything was going and the pain didn’t hurt so bad. It was disappearing.

But that all came crashing down one night when someone was knocking on your door. You opened it, expecting your pizza but there in all his glory, stood a very drunk Chan with an even more drunk Felix.

Tweedle dee and tweedle can’t-stand-on-his-own were singing tik tok songs. They looked surprised when you opened the door. As if they had no clue you lived there.

‘Hey!? How are you??? It’s been ages’ Chan said as they both sauntered in.

‘What are you doing-‘

‘WOW! I like your new place. You should invite me over for a sleep over sometime,’ Felix interupted.

You rolled your eyes as you looked out into the hallway, making sure there weren’t any more drunk stray kids dawdling around. (I’m hilarious, I know)

You closed your door and got them a water bottle each as you sat them down in the living room. There wasn’t much room to talk to them because they kept bouncing gibberish off each other. When your food arrived, you gave them two slices each and they were basically knocked out after that.

You grabbed a blanket and put it over them. This gave you a chance to really get a look at Chan. He never got drunk. He didn’t like drinking. This was out of the ordinary for him. That and the fact that of course he looked even more tired then usual. As you looked at Felix, you noticed he looked tired too.

You couldn’t understand why you were being so nice. You had no reason to be. When they eventually woke up on a sidewalk somewhere, after their drunken adventures, they would have no reason to even think of you. Let alone blame you for not helping.

But here they are, fed and passed out on your sofa. You couldn’t stand to look at them anymore so you got up and went to your room. It was harder to sleep knowing they were in the next room. He was in the next room.

But eventually, with a few tears and a hint of heartbreak, you fell asleep.

You were woken up by whispering, loud whispering. If you wanna whisper, why do it loudly? Does that not defeat the point of whispering?

You opened your eyes to Chan and Felix talking to each other. When they both looked back at you and saw you awake, they both jumped. Then started apologising profusely for having come here.

‘What are you doing in here?’ You asked groggily.

‘We um-we made you breakfast,’ Felix replied.

‘We were gonna wake you up but you looked so peaceful…’ Chan added on.

‘You didn’t need to do that,’ you said as you fidgeted with your hands.

‘We did! You had no reason to look after us last night but you did… we really appreciate it,’ Chan said.

‘It’s nothing. Look, I have to go to work so you guys should probably leave now.’

They didn’t think too much and apologised again as they started getting ready to leave. Just before they left though, Chan asked if he could talk to you… alone. You were hesitent and honestly? The mere idea instilled a world of dread in you. But he kept insisting on atleast talking once so you gave him a chance. You guys decided to meet at your apartment again the next day. You would have gone to his but… that place held every memory of you both together.

The next 24 hours were uncomfortable and you couldn’t get anything else done.

The agonising time seemed to come to an end finally though as you heard the knock on your door. You stopped and looked in a mirror to make sure you looked okay. Then you felt stupid for doing that because he didn’t deserve your effort.

You opened the door and really looked at him today. He looked good… more then good… he was wearing your favourite shirt.

You looked away as you let him in. Not even registering that he had said hello to you.

He went over to the sofa and sat down as you sat in an armchair. There was an awkward silence that you definitely did not plan to break. So inevitably, he did.

‘I don’t want to beat around the bush… I want to say I’m sorry… I was terrible for what I said…’

It angered you that this was what he thought was wrong… what he said? Really?

‘What? That all? Not sorry for lying about liking me the whole time? Not sorry for knowing there was something ‘wierd’ about me but still stringing me along? I’m too immature and self involved for you but you’re sorry for what? Letting me know? Letting it slip how you really felt?’

‘I was stupid for saying that because I didn’t mean it… I might’ve had those thoughts come to me in the first week of knowing you but it was stupid and I never actually thought you were those things… what you did hurt me and I… wanted to hurt you back…’

‘I get that… but actually… I don’t. I know what I did was wrong too and I’m sorry but… what you did… there isn’t any way to undo that. I can’t trust you anymore. And even if I could magically get over what you thought, the fact that the other guys told you not to be with me? I can’t even begin to unpack that. I can’t be around any of you anymore. I would have to hate myself to subject myself to that.’

He didn’t know what to say as he looked down. Tears welling up in his eyes as he said sorry again for the millionth time.

But you both sat there, in the silence, knowing these were your last moments together… this was it…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: 😈

This is you rn:

This is me:

I’m sorry 😂 it’s ok though, I just got rejected by my cat so I’m sad too.

The Hyunjin story part 2 hopefully is next to be published. I’m having a hard time writing it but we’ll get there

Please reblog (with hashtags if you can pls) and like and gimme feedback. I’ll see you next time :)

[creat0r-cat]

Iplier Egos Head Cannon - What Song in "Encanto" Did They Get Emotional During?

Darkiplier

Surface Pressure

Deep down he really does care about his “brothers”

He thinks he needs to keep up the tough guy act to make them think he isn’t afraid

He is

He REALLY is

He’s worried about the space/time continuum, keeping order, and making sure the ipliers’ existence stays a secret

He tries not to let the others see the tears that involuntarily start to fall as Louisa sings about her struggles as the strongest sister

Wilford

He probably heard all of the songs before watching the movie

He wouldn’t really cry for any of them in particular (feeling that he doesn’t necessarily relate to any of them)

However

He would look at certain egos to watch their reactions during different songs

He would notice the small things that happen and slowly learn more about his “brothers” based on the musical numbers and their lyrics

After the movie, he’d probably go and visit the egos that had the worst reactions (who got the most emotional or those who would straight up leave the room)

He did get a little bothered listening to “Dos Oruguitas” though

He didn’t get emotional per say

But watching Pedro die with the love song in the background kinda reminded him of when he lost Celine

Fortunately, he opted not to dwell on it too much

Actor

Waiting On A Miracle

This boy is INSECURE because of his breakup with Celine

Is he good enough?

Has he done enough?

Is he really worthy of anything?

He wants to be better

He wants his life to be better

But everything seems to slip through his fingers, coming back to resent him later on

He just wants someone to open their eyes and see that he’s worth their time, even if that person is Dark

Mirabel dancing on screen, singing about how she wished to be noticed as part of the family, made Actor tear up, wiping them away before someone could see them

Eventually, it got to be too much (especially seeing how Mirabel was pushed away by her family after trying to help them) and he left the room, using the excuse of getting more snacks

As soon as he entered the kitchen, he had a silent breakdown

Googleplier

Surface Pressure

I can’t really hear Louisa sing “I’m pretty sure I’m worthless if I can’t be of service” without thinking about Google and his first objective

Yes, his secondary objective is relatively important, but the first one is.. Well it’s his PRIMARY objective

If he can’t do anything other than hurt people, then what is the point of him being there?

His optics widen and his mechanical heart speeds up

“How do you feel?” survey pops up and he clicks on one

“I’m in this picture and I don’t like it”

Bingiplier

What Else Can I Do?

He’s imperfect

That’s all I really need to say, but I’ll continue

He’s always compared to Google and he knows deep down that he’s worth more than his search bar abilities

He doesn’t want to be perfect like Google

He just wants to be himself, which is hard when everyone is always doting on him for every mistake he makes

Isabella creating spiky plants and beautiful flowers in front of him makes his optics widen and he slowly smiles, feeling an odd mixture of happiness and sadness as he watches her accept her imperfections in spite of her family’s expectations

Dr. Iplier

He doesn’t really get emotional during the songs

However

When it’s revealed that Bruno has been shunned by his family because of his gift, he smiled sadly

“How unfortunate,” he thought, “for someone to be abandoned because of something uncontrollable and never be spoken of again for fear of taboo”

He’s seen patients in the hospital who never have anyone visit them

He always feels sad when he finds out that someone has been abandoned

He secretly makes trips to animal shelters for that reason, to visit the abandoned animals and give them some love

He gets happy again when Bruno is reunited with his loved ones who welcome him back with open arms

Yandereplier 

Dos Oruguitas

He wouldn’t relate to any of the English songs enough to have a real reaction

He gets emotional during certain parts of the movie because he recognizes a lot of what’s going on in the Madrigal family (Toxic family roles and stuff like that)

He feels bad for the characters (especially Mirabel and Bruno)

But when “Dos Oruguitas” starts playing and we find out the heartbreaking truth behind Abuelo Pedro’s death

WHOOOO BOY the tears start FLOWING

He hates to imagine the pain Abuela went through, losing the love of her life

Yandere, being a very romantic man, can’t stand the thought of his own senpai leaving him

Like, she’s everything to him!

He’d become very protective of her after watching this movie, afraid of anyone taking her away from him

He’s fine with the movie though, loves the music for the most part

Yancy

Friggin ALL OF THE SONGS

He loves music and finds each of them so amazing

He also kinda relates to each of the English sung songs in their own way (except “We Don’t Talk About Bruno”)

WOAM: The want to be extraordinary and help others

SP: The need to be the tough one and look out for his fellow prisoners and weaker “brothers”

WECAD: The want to live life how he wants without being the picture perfect civilian that the world wants him to be

He thinks very highly of this movie and loves it to bits

He does eventually become frustrated with how often “We Don’t Talk About Bruno” gets sung by people both online and in real life

Like, he gets that it’s a catchy song, but still, give it a break

Illinois

Waiting On A Miracle

Yes, Illinois is a special adventurous and flirtatious boy 

But not everything is really as it seems with him

His whole “Everyone falls in love with me” act is a facade

He’s trying to convince himself that he’s loved / cared about by someone

He took up adventuring to be different

To be a conversation starter

To be interesting so that somebody

ANYBODY

Would look his way and want to be around him 

After all..

He wasn’t special or cool enough growing up to have many / any friends

He sees way too much of himself in Mirabel and ends up leaving the group for a few minutes to cry in the bathroom

Engineer Mark

Waiting On A Miracle

What else needs to be said?

If given pictures of Engineer and Mirabel everyone would say they were the same image

Insecure

Feels unwanted

Wants to be impressive and help those around him with his talents and ideas

Hides behind a false persona of happiness

THEY

ARE

THE

SAME

PERSON

He’s close to leaving the room but stays put, activating his space helmet which is also soundproof so no one can see / hear him start to cry

Poor man can’t hear “Waiting On A Miracle” without having a breakdown

[mothgardens]

im back again with another lyric analysis <3 this edition is for Sastiel (my beloved).

State Of Grace by Taylor Swift (preferably the acoustic version)

All Sam has known for his whole life is touch and go. He has never been in one place for more than a few months at a time (other than his escape to Stanford).

He also has been more aware and open-minded than Dean his whole life; he has a changing mind when given new information, like how he learns to understand that the ‘monsters’ they fight aren’t always evil, and that he can empathize with them. He learned this far before Dean.

He has always loved whole and hard; his love always bleeds, he has been hurt so much through losing the people he held dearest. They fade away.

“You come around and the armor falls” <— is literally the Gadreel grace retraction scene. Cas telling Sam “The only person who has screwed up things more consistently than you, is me.” !! So delicate and intimate.

They have each other. Even when Dean is missing or gone, even when they feel like they have messed everything up, they have each other. They don’t let go, they can’t, they won’t. <3

“Just go to my room and turn on Netflix, you will figure it out” is such an important line to me (even though i couldn’t find the real quote). Sam feels comfortable enough with Cas to let him be in his room, his private space, alone. Cas feels comfortable enough in Sam’s room to take his beloved trench coat off. They trust each other; when they are together, everything is wiped clean.

THIS IS THEM !! ^^^

Cas was never a saint. He didn’t succeed as God. He didn’t succeed as an Angel of the Lord. He didn’t succeed in Dean’s eyes. (“Something always goes wrong, Dean”; “Why does that always seem to be you.”).

Sam loved a werewolf. Sam loved a demon. Sam loved a witch. In Dean’s eyes, Sam always loved in shades of wrong.

They learned to live with the pain, separately at first, but, they also learned to live with each other’s pain. Cas literally told Sam, “I was lost until I took your pain”.

According to Google, Mosaic is “an individual (especially an animal) composed of cells of two genetically different types”.

Sam and Cas are systematically different on a surface level, obviously, as angel and human, but Sam also has demon blood running through him. It’s part of him. Sam and Cas, on an inner, biological level, are opposites. They’re LITERALLY “Mosaic broken hearts”.

When they’re together they’re brave. Especially when Cas is looking for Sam, or protecting him.

- “Who are you, and where is Sam?”

- “You wont take Sam Winchester. I won't let you.”

- “You come near Sam Winchester, and I will kill you.”

But, also, their love is wild, they have such s chaotic energy as a duo. They are unhinged, but also mean well.

To me, grace is literally their entire theme. (I am a bitch for the grace drinking ‘purification’ idea, too.)

Cas believes Sam is a worthwhile fight: “Nothing is worth losing you”.

This last line, to me, is totally post-Jack era. They have a family together, a son, that they both would die for. They love each other. Sam sent so many texts with Cas left, he was so worried. When Cas showed back up in the bunker he looked at him like he could make his world continue spinning.

Lastly, the chorus:

Sam never thought Cas would come into his life. A real angel. An angel who would later become one of the most important people in his life.

Cas never expected Sam to be this important to him. He thought of Sam as the ‘boy with demon blood’, an abomination. But, Sam proved himself to be so much more than that.

Neither of them would ever be where they are without each other, and they will never be the same.

———————

Okay :3 that is all.

[somany-fandoms-solittle-time]

“What’s so Special About the Moon?”

Jamil Viper x MC(insert character Mac)

(Ch. 1) – Ch. 2 – Ch. 3 – Ch. 4 – Next – Previous

This was originally supposed to be, like, a single chapter hurt/comfort before my OC (Mac) and Jamil as a song fic where they berate him and then sing a song referencing the moon… but then I had feelings and it’s becoming a more in depth character study between the two. Don’t worry! By the end of this mini series, there will be song lyrics and more sappiness… it’s just now that I’ve finished both Book 4 and Book 5, I need to reorganize the events and specific and whatnot. Some quick housekeeping as always: I tried to make Jamil to encompass both his dark & mysterious villain persona ALONG WITH him practically being a fucking child so that’s why I wrote him like *this* so yeah… I’m moving around the timeline so that Yuu/MC (aka Mac) has the weekend to GET THEIR SHIT TOGETHER LOL, Mac is about 19-20 (haven’t decided yet) and uses mixed pronouns as a heads up, Ch. 2 has a 1st draft written put still needs to be typed up and edited. If you see a typo NO YOU DIDN’T!!! This one of my first times trying a different writing doc that isn’t Google (cuz fuck Google) and it’s a little weird to get used to and edit stuff. It’s beta-d in the sense that licking the spatula while your mom bakes cookies and claiming that you helped… literally only a few paragraphs were checked over y’all.

Quick shout-out to @krenenbaker and @twst-beam for inspiring my writing thus far (and sorry for taking so long to post this lol!)

I’ll be releasing some type of overview of my OC eventually, but take these snippets as they go while I fall back in love with writing. You’ll meet Mac in full when xey are good and ready… anyway, please enjoy Chapter 1 of my new fanfiction, “What’s So Special About the Moon?”

“Here. You can use this one,” Jamil directed towards the plain (compared to the rest of the dorm) laundry… mat? There were several industrial sized washer and dryers, a couple moderate-sized one’s that would fit a regular apartment complex, and a long wall designated area for hand washed items. Jamil was keeping the door prompt open with his hips; his slight frown of concentration and the flick of his Magic Pen were the only signs of the current spell he had going. Turning around, MC was slightly surprised by the massive piles of fabric that was being corralled in via multiple a massive sheet tied to multiple brooms. They still couldn’t fully grasp the concept (and power) of magic and seeing it so casually performed on a day-to-day basis was kinda daunting.

“Thanks again for letting us use the space along with showing me how to properly clean all these fancy duds and whatnot.” the Ramshackle Perfect awkwardly trailed off. Their focus was split between stealing peaks at the Scarabia Vice Warden, not wanting to bother the already busy Sophomore, and surveying over the dusty, damaged antique pieces the two stripped from the halls of the previously abandoned dorm. Rugs, carpets, curtains, furniture covers (in varying state of disrepair) dulled of their once rich and vibrant color. The patterns were a mix of stuffy academia and the quiet comfort of a grandparents cottage living room. Both extravagant, yet understated. It’s a style lost to time, but not quite a revived ancient aesthetic.

At this point MC was fully lost in thought; they desperately needed to clean, fix, organize and decorate the dorm in preparation to host so many guests. Even with his limited memories, they had a feeling they’d never hear the end of it from his parents.

“Don’t worry about it much.” Jamil said, interrupting their musings. “Honestly, I’m doing this as much for myself as I am helping you.

With a flick of his wrist, Jamil organized the seemingly random crumbled piles of fabric by condition, color and use. His movements while cleaning were quick, smart, and efficient-- all while patiently showing Mac which order to start in along with the best way to clean them.

“Ya’ know…” MC broke the relative quietness between the two workers, “Even with everything thing that happened over break, I understand why Kalim still trusts you; I almost can believe that you’re not that bad of a guy.” Jamil gave xem a startled (and exasperated) look, but they continued before he could respond: “I fail to see how helping the person who ruined your ‘world domination’ plans—”

“They were hardly World Domination level!” He quickly snapped. His embarrassment led to him tugging his hood further down his face, teeth slightly clenched, and dilated eyes as MC continued listing all the ways he’s “helped” them out.

The magic-less Perfect laughed to themselves the more conflicting emotions flew across Jamil’s face. Eventually those same emotions were compressed behind a cold, smooth mask. Limestone slabs and stiff mud brick walls were swiftly constructed between the two working-class students. Something about it didn’t sit right with Mac.

“Hey I’m not saying what you pulled wasn’t a dick move! But you’re also not the first overly-traumatized teen boy I’ve had to deal with… and between what you’ve said about yourself, plus thing’s I’ve heard and seen, I’m starting to think you’re not nearly as complicated as you think you are.” The longer they argued *to* him, the more Jamil’s mask began to crack; there were a few holes in his walls he didn’t account for. Xe’s a tad more observant than I remember, but weirdly just as persistent, Jamil internally rolled his eyes.

“I could still change my mind and send you back to deal with the Pomefiore Wrath(tm),” He mumbled while gracefully lugging the newly cleaned (and damp) furniture coverings into an empty drier. Despite his harsh threat, MC still remembered him assuring the other this laundry room was only ever used by him after Kalim’s parties.

The large machines and larger working space was specifically added for the servant to clean and repair any decor or Asim Family Treasures when Kalim’s recklessness caused a larger mess than usual. This meant that Mac and Grim (who was originally supposed to be helping… where the hell was he anyway?) could do as many loads needed without worry. On top of the borrowed space, the Housewarden himself had cheerily has assured them, his Oasis Maker would replace all the water used ten times over!

Mac’s thoughts were interrupted once again as Jamil relented, “I told you, I’m doing this to help me.” After receiving an unconvinced eyebrow raise, Jamil began to explain, “Kalim might’ve announced us as equals but I still have a job to do. If he got sick while spending Allah knows how long in a dusty, dirty, shabby condemned building like Ramshackle I’ll never hear the end of it.”

“It’s not nearly that bad anymore!” the sole-human resident of said dorm argued, but was quickly shut up with a tired gesture towards the untouched loads of laundry left to be done.

“On top of that,” Jamil smirked “Even a common peasant like myself wouldn’t sleep in a rundown garbage heap if I can help it.” His smirk slowly slide off his face from his face as the insulted Perfect almost ripped the handful of soapy doilies, that they were previously scrubbing by hand, as xey prepared a retaliation.

“OK, first of all! This whole Inferior-Superior shtick isn’t going to prove your point. If I’m being totally honest, I’m pretty used to the bratty, arrogant attitude of teenagers by now (even if I wasn’t Leona is a thousand times worse).” They turned their full body to face the 2nd year boy before continuing the assault. “Secondly, even just doing the bare minimum would’ve been fine, considering I’ve slowly been deep cleaning them place room by room. This is just last minute cleaning considering I wasn’t expected to host six extra people in two days.”

The shock of Mac’s care and attention to detail couldn’t win over Jamil’s newfound freedom to be right… and sassy while doing it. “Keep in mind you wouldn’t be the only one having to deal with Vil. His expectations are much higher than my personal standards—”

“Getting there!” MC interrupted again. “It’s not like Vil and whoever else couldn’t magic things better or get things done over at Pomefiore.” However, their fire started to die down with their obvious lack of understanding of magic. Not that Xeir level of intellect ever stopped them from talking out of their ass during debates… even if this wasn’t exactly shaping up to be anything like Debate Club back home.

“Not the point!” Mac built back their steam after thoughtlessly shaking off any internal distractions. “Third of all,” Jamil groaned not-so-quietly, “third of all, you didn’t have to show me how to do it. Nor did you have to continue helping me. There’s only so much I could pay you back in favors and it’s not like you’ll make back the time and energy spent. You’re obviously a bit of a piece of shit but I don’t totally blame…”

Jamil suddenly gave Mac his full attention. He smoothed any emotional tells from his face and readied himself to actively dissect what ever left xeir mouth and any messages in between the lines. The silence prompted Mac to drip extra sincerity as they begin to ramble without thinking.

“… I get why you did what you did. You’re not totally forgiven, but it’s not like I’ll hold a grudge over you forever. Whenever I joke about Winter Break I thought you knew it was just that: a joke.”

The two stared at one another for a few beats. Jamil betrayed nothing that he was thinking, but Mac could practically feel the exasperation flooding off of him in great waves. The disbelief pushing and pulling off of him, despite remaining stone cold to zeir admission. So, of course, they continued with slight for fever:

“Yeah, okay, you held us all prisoner, enslaved via hypnosis your entire dorm, and nearly killed multiple students. Twice.” Mac cringed at their own blunt statement, “… But why would you go as far as you did, if you didn’t care! What your parents, and more specifically your culture, put you through wasn’t fair—but you obviously still love and cherish them!”

At this, he seemed to get even more guarded. It felt patronizing to be hold how he supposedly felt or why he should feel a specific way. They hadn’t been there. They hadn’t grown up as a Viper in the Desert, constantly reminded by Kalim’s Mirage of wealth what he could never have. They didn’t know the FIRST thing about the Scalding Sands—!

“… How do you know anything about my parents? Did Kalim--?!” He choked out infuriated at the mere implication.

“Relax Viper! It’s all in the Secret of The Ooze™”

“What?”

“Never mind…”

The usual absurdity of MC’s references (much to xeir chagrin that no one seemed to understand them) Jamil allowed himself a shadow of a smirk. Right about now they’d drop what they were saying and instead empathize with him over terrible bosses. They’d both fall back into a familiar pattern of quiet understanding while making playful small talk; maybe Xe’d make a remark over how “hellish” the desert temperature is and moan about being “a poor Northern forced into the sun” before dragging them both off to grab an abominably sweet drink that Kalim would still put sugar in. Xe had always been could at mediating with the other students at NCR.

However, they didn’t drop it. They continued to push him… especially when they realized that he expected the conversation to have ended and started to relax. Xey pushed and pushed and pushed. Finally, they had circled back to him rebelling from his status.

“What? You think I’d be Happier staying a lowly servant?! I’d rather cut my own tongue out than remain bending to Kalim’s will for the rest of my days.” He huffed, still not stopping his assault on the pile of laundry in front of him.

A frustrated sigh left Mac as Xey tried to get their point across, “THAT’S NOT WHAT I’M SAYING!… Obviously, you don’t love being forced into child labor or having to pretend to be something you’re not, but that doesn’t mean you’re totally being honest with yourself either. Rebelling adolescents often do a complete 180 of who they once presented as in an extreme action to feel validated.”

Jamil scoffed in indignation at the impromptu therapy session he’d been forced into.

“Just because you were forced to lie sometimes as ‘Servant Jamil’ doesn’t mean those memories or feelings weren’t authentic!”

“My Childhood, my Pride, my ENTIRE LIFE was stolen from me before I could even open my eyes, Mac! Who could cherish that sort of future?”

“I’m not disputing that! I’m not trying, in any way, to imply that what you went through didn’t fucking suck. But just because you’ve started saying the quiet part out loud doesn’t mean you’re being totally honest either. Switching one mask for another just means nothing has changed but your ability to bitch about-it to the kid you literally Grew Up With, Jamil.” A tired resignation was growing in their eyes as they headed to the end of xeir rant.

It was clear MC was starting to speak in circles and xey weren’t going to be able to get through to them. A heavy weight sunk deep in their chest, slowly sliding to xeir stomach the more he misunderstood the magic-less student. I saw him drown in the depths of his own helplessness and self-pity, but even after he’s been pulled out it’s like he can’t help but dive back in for a swim. It was a suffocating thought while Mac watched as Jamil once again went stone-faced… Like what he was about to say would be his final shield before walking away. It’s a shame that the Ramshackle Resident had become too used to throwing bombs over walls and blowing verbal shields to smithereens after months of being stuck in Twisted Wonderland.

“I’m not sugarcoating or bowing down to anyone anymore. I won’t bite my tongue. I won’t put on a Happy Face to Kalim’s idiotic, half-thought out ideas again. I’m slowly gaining my freedom, something you clearly don’t understand. Just because you’re as blind as he is doesn’t mean anything! What more could you want from me?!” He hissed his final insult before finally stepping away from his station. Not leaving the room, he aggressively got himself a cup of water from one of the sink and gulped the unfiltered water down.

“Just because you’re not hiding your bitter, knee-jerk reaction from an unfair world doesn’t mean you aren’t still hiding away and lying about your more vulnerable emotions.” Mac whispered in an emotionless tone. “Cutting a part of your past off and pretending it was never there is doing yourself a disservice and lying to those that still care about you… And there sure-as-shit isn’t much that I hate more than a Fucking Liar.”

. . . . . .

The lacy doilies sat in a sudsy basin, left forgotten as the two students stood a mere paces from each other—both maintaining an uncomfortably intense eye contact. The sloshing thump of the washers and stirring hum of driers harmonizing were the only song to accompany the two’s stare down. A short hiccup as Mac took a drawn out breath was the only reaction between the two of them. The combined heat of Scarabia’s sun (barely past 10am) and the humidity of continued use of machinery didn’t help the suffocating air in the wide laundry room. Not to mention the loud, stifling silence to boot.

MC usually held back such honest commentary (not that they weren’t blunt) unless Xe deemed it necessary: think high stakes and a sense of urgent drama. But something about Jamil and Kalim’s situation reminded them of himself. The two’s intertwined dance of class, history, loyalty and betrayal, friendship and loss, and such overwhelming guilt reminded the dimension hoping stranger of home. Whatever that meant.

But this was no time to get lost in their own problems and Trauma’s. They’d went too far (again) and that means xey should be the bigger person (again) and deescalate the situation before he hated them (AGAIN). Which means, MC would be the one to break the silence and run away again.

“Ya’ know what? Grim’s probably burned the school down already. Don’t worry about,” Ze gestured blindly to the numerous stations they’d started, “this mess. I’ll rope my little Rat Gremlin and the Freshies into finishing this up. Hell, I could probably convince Rugs to pitch in for lunch or something. Bully the Music Club with helping in exchange of random sheet music I still remember from home.”

Their rambles became more spastic as they noticed Mr. Sugar, Spice and Not-So-Nice break out of his own trance and try to reply. “Seriously! Just enjoy the break… Not that it’s my place or responsibility to be butting in anyway. I will be back in, like, 10 minutes and from here-on-out minding my own damn business. Sorry. Whatever. See you sometime after Sunday, I guess?” Their entire monoluge Mac was slowly backing out of the room before turning around in xeir spot and just short of sprinting their way out of the dorm. A few passerby Scarabia students stopped to eavesdrop on xeir muttering… watch them leave.

Without getting a word in Jamil stood unmoving, watching the Ramshackle Perfect leave swifter than the desert wind shifting the dunes. Almost on auto-pilot, he simply left to go back to his room and do as he was told; enjoy his break. His day off. The day he could do what he liked and didn’t necessarily have to prioritize work. A day he spent working to help and assist the pitiful, magic-less loser that was dropped-kicked into another reality and forced to play nice with a University filled with overpowered and hormonal teenagers while having no way home… And in return was insulted, psychoanalyzed, and thrown aside before he could get a word in edgewise.

“Son of a STREET RAT!!!!!” It was clear he’d need a few hours to calm down before he could even think of trying to enjoy the rest of his Saturday off.

[touloserrrr]

Since I am totally very normal about Six… I have decided to overanalyse all the lyrics: Don’t Lose Ur Head

Grew up in the French Court

Initially I thought this meant Boleyn was French, but a simple google search actually reveals she was born in England, but did part of her education in France as a maid of honour (lady in waiting) to the French queen.

Oui, oui, bonjour

“Yes, yes, hello” in French to indicate her upbringing.

Life was a chore so (she set sail)

1522 came straight to the UK

Boleyn returned to England that year to marry a distant cousin. This was planned simply in the interest of her family for some land.

All the British dudes, lame

Epic fail

This engagement was broken off at some point, though there is nothing to suggest a specific reason. This has left Boleyn a single woman in England.

Ooh, I wanna dance and sing

This could be a reference to her character in the musical as she had become a singer here, however, this could also reference the fact Boleyn was known for singing and dancing rather well.

Politics, not my thing

Ooh, but then I met the King

Boleyn became a maid of honour to Catherine of Aragon, which led to her meeting Henry. In 1526, he became interested in her and attempted to seduce her.

And soon my daddy said, "You should try and get ahead"

Might be about trying to get ahead of her sister Mary Boleyn, who was Henry’s past mistress but nothing more. Additionally, this line sounds like “get a head”, hinting at her eventual loss of a head.

He wanted me, huh, obviously

Messaging me like everyday

This is of course as in sending letters, but could be a parody of the trope of the cheating husband messaging his lover on his phone every day and having to be secretive about it to his wife.

Couldn't be better, then he sent me a letter and who am I kidding

I was prêt-à-manger

I do not speak any French so had to use google translate; “ready to eat”. I was confused at first why this line would be used, but I figured it may be one of these possibilities: could be literally referring to royal food as Henry was very wealthy and ate better than anyone else at the time; ready to eat up all of the love she is given; or it could be a sexual innuendo.

Ooh, sent a reply

Ooh, just saying hi

Ooh, you're a nice guy

Surface level, seems like Boleyn is saying she believed Henry was a decent man. However, overanalysis kicks in! This possibly could be a reference to the modern use of the term “nice guy”; a man who acts nice to a woman but believes he is entitled to something, so if something does not go his way, he flips.

I'll think about it maybe, xo baby

Here we go

(You sent him kisses)

I didn't know I would move in with his misses

Boleyn, Aragon and Henry were living in the same palace due to Boleyn’s position in court, but later she was moved to her own lodging to be closer to Henry.

(What?)

Get a life

You're living with his wife?

Like, what was I meant to do?

Once Henry made up his mind, the woman in his life had little control over the next events. This is later proven in ‘I Don’t Need Your Love’. Boleyn did not have many options in her situation.

Sorry, not sorry 'bout what I said

Boleyn was known to have some rather controversial things (at the time) when angered, one of the most notable examples being “Ainsi sera groigne qui groigne”, which means “Let them grumble; that is how it is going to be”, this being her motto. This line could possibly also be about the things she said to Henry which led to him annulling his marriage with Catherine of Aragon, and becoming supreme head of the Church of England.

I'm just tryna have some fun

Don't worry, don't worry, don't lose your head

To ‘lose your head’ means to lose self-control or panic, but it also obviously refers to the fact that Boleyn was beheaded, so she literally was the one to lose her head.

I didn't mean to hurt anyone

LOL, say oh well

The use of modern language that has been popularised with social media contrasts with the time period these events took place. Additionally, this language is rather casual, so it shows the character’s attitude to the whole situation.

Or go to hell

This is another major contrast - the line before this was rather innocent-sounding, and suggests she had no ill-intent, yet this line is the complete opposite as the Tudor times were very religious so this would’ve been taken rather seriously.

I'm sorry, not sorry 'bout what I said

Don't lose your head

Three in the bed and the little one said

This is a reference to the famous (at least in England) nursery song ‘Ten In The Bed’. In this bit the character of Boleyn points to herself in reference to “the little one”, which could also be highlighting how Anne Boleyn was around 10 years younger than Henry, and more than that than Aragon.

If you wanna be wed, make up your mind

Her or me, chum

The letters Henry sent to Boleyn indicate she refused to sleep with him for most of their relationship before marriage, likely because it was looked down upon if a woman wasn’t a virgin before marriage. This likely was a factor in why Henry decided he wanted Boleyn to be more than just another one of his mistresses.

Don't wanna be some

Girl in a threesome

Are you blind?

Ooh, don't be bitter

Ooh, 'cause I'm fitter

This shows a sort of conflict between Aragon and Boleyn, which may represent how civilians of England would show support to different queens (mainly Aragon) as a new queen was a rather large change at the time.

Ooh, why hasn't it hit her?

He doesn't want to bang you

Somebody hang you

This might refer to a quote by Anne Boleyn, where she said would “rather see her hanged than acknowledge her as her mistress”.

Here we go

Your comment went viral

This is relevant to social media today how certain things can ‘go viral’, and can lead to cancel culture, like how Boleyn became hated by most of England, mostly because Aragon was a beloved queen.

I didn't really mean it but rumours spiral

Wow Anne, way to make the country hate you

As I stated before, Boleyn was hated and unpopular with a lot of the English population, and that led to some riots against her.

Mate, what was I meant to do?

Sorry, not sorry 'bout what I said

I'm just tryna have some fun

Don't worry, don't worry, don't lose your head

I didn't mean to hurt anyone

LOL, say oh well

Or go to hell

I'm sorry, not sorry 'bout what I said

Don't lose your head

Tried to elope

But the pope said nope

At first Henry actually asked the pope to annul his marriage with Aragon in order to marry Boleyn, but this was obviously refused. Henry had the court meet to discuss this matter, but nothing really went from there. The two of them ended up getting married in secret.

Our only hope was Henry

He got a promotion

Henry pushed the Act of Supremacy, which made him the supreme head of the Church of England. This meant the pope held no religious authority over England, and he did divorce Aragon as he had wanted for a long time, not only because of Boleyn, but also because he wanted a son.

Caused a commotion

Set in motion the C of E

The C of E is just a shortened phrase that refers to the Church of England, whom Henry was the head of.

The rules were so outdated

This likely refers to how many times Henry’s annulment to Aragon was denied, which didn’t allow for Boleyn and Henry to marry.

Us two wanted to get x-rated

In order to sleep with one another, couples were expected to marry first, so this line is a reference to that.

Soon, ex-communicated

Everybody chill, its totes God's will

Boleyn was a Catholic and was rather religious, but not as religious as some of the other queens.

Henry's out every night on the town

Just sleeping around, like what the hell?

Henry was known to have lots of mistresses during his marriages, and his marriage to Boleyn was no exception. She already knew he used to sleep with her sister while he was married to Aragon and had a son with another woman. Historical sources claim that he had started courting Jane Seymour during this marriage.

If that's how it's gonna be

Maybe I'll flirt with a guy or three

Boleyn was known to be rather flirtatious and was later charged with adultery. One of the men believed to have been a lover of hers was Mark Smeaton, who confessed to this accusation, however, this was likely after being tortured or promised freedom, so it is difficult to say if this was an accurate accusation. There were a few other men who Henry claimed Boleyn had romantic affairs with, but there is not that much evidence for those, which is why historians often theorise Henry made up these charges in order to get rid of his wife in order to marry Seymour.

Just to make him jell

Henry finds out and he goes mental

He screams and shouts

Like so judgemental

You damned witch

Boleyn wasn’t actually charged with witchcraft, but a lot of people over the years spread the rumour of her being a witch, claiming she had a sixth finger - and deformities like this were associated with witchcraft in the past. There is no real evidence to suggest she did have this.

Mate, just shut up

Women weren’t expected to stand up to their husbands, so Boleyn telling Henry to “shut up” would have been very much looked down upon.

I wouldn't be such a b-

Throughout the entire musical, curse words are censored mostly by the other queens interrupting.

If you could get it up

Here we go

(Is that what you said?)

And now he's going 'round like off with her head

(No)

Yeah, I'm pretty sure he means it

(Seems it)

Of course, this is referring to how Henry decided to have Boleyn executed, specifically by beheading. The phrase “off with their head” became popularised by Lewis Carroll, who published his original books on Alice in Wonderland, which is said by the Queen of Hearts.

What was I meant to do?

(What was she meant to do?)

Like what was I meant to do?

(What was she meant to do?)

No, but what was I meant to do?

Sorry, not sorry 'bout what I said

I'm just tryna have some fun

Don't worry, don't worry, don't lose your head

I didn't mean to hurt anyone

LOL, say oh well

Or go to hell (she's going to hell)

Sorry, not sorry 'bout what I said

Sorry, not sorry 'bout what she said

Sorry, not sorry 'bout what I said

Don't lose your head

Haha sorry

In a fit of anger, Boleyn would say things she regretted, which is reflected by the fact she apologised only at the end.

EXTRA: After this song, the character of Boleyn attempts to perform a solo song titled ‘Wearing Yellow To A Funeral’. This is a reference to how after Catherine of Aragon died, Henry was happy to hear the news, and attended her funeral with his new wife Anne Boleyn. They were both wearing yellow, which was a colour that symbolised mourning in Spain (Aragon’s country of origin), but joy and celebration in England.

[alba8688]

💔Love hurts 💔

Chapter 61

Word count:451

Warnings:A lot of mentions of blood I won’t say anything else but yeah blood.No minors here please.

A/n was listening to Experience from ludovico Einudi writing this chapter so i would recommend listening to it too ..also I’m Really sorry please don’t hate me …

(Pic from google)

💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

November 27

Today was the first day Dani was going to be alone with Lyric and Nate .Today was back to school for

Dustin and Eddie after Thanksgiving break.

Mrs.Henderson had an early shift at the hospital so it was just Dani ,The kids and Ozzy.

This morning Dani felt lonely so she decided to take a small trip to visit Eddie during lunch at Hawkins University to have lunch together as a family .So Dani got lyric and Nate ready to head out .

She made sure she had Lyrics bottles and all her necessities for the trip as well as Nate's backpack with his charger for his tablet and other snacks he might want.She also check for Ozzy's water bowl

And food bowl .Making sure everything was there .

She put ozzy's service dog vest on and got herself ready while Lyric was napping and Nate was busy watching his tablet .She lock the door to her room and took one look at Nate who was sipping on a juice box and laughing at a video he was watching .

Dani walk over to him And place a kiss on top of his head and headed to her closet to choose her clothes for the day she wanted to look pretty but also she wanted to feel comfortable.she decided to wear black ripped jeans with an oversize black and white sweater with her combats boots and her hair up in a high bun.She did her makeup simple and got her purse and her keys to her rented car .She hasn't gotten a new car because her and Eddie were supposed to go together to the Car Dealership .So she rented a car for the moment while she received the check of her car from the insurance .

Dani got the diaper bag then look over at Nate who was smiling hugging one of his favorite plushies.

"Hey baby it's time to leave come on ." She said sweetly to her son .Nate got up putting on his shoes and grabbing his backpack after he was done he smiles at Dani and hugs her tightly .

"I love you momma." Dani hug him back tightly ,Nate was never like this so Dani enjoy the moments when he was lovable to her .

"I love you too baby ." She place a kiss on top of his head then grabbed the car seat and headed outside to the car .

First she made sure to turn it on ,then she strapped the car seat making sure it was safety buckled then she checked on Nate's and Ozzy seatbelt and close the back door then got in the front seat putting on her seatbelt.

While driving off the driveway a black pick up truck got her attention it was park on the corner of the street she didn't think anything of it and drove off to meet Eddie .

On the stop light Dani noticed the same truck on back of her she couldn't see who was driving it but again she didn't think much of it and drove off to her destination.

On her way over to Eddie she called Eddie letting him know she was on her way to meet them at the restaurant they were planning to meet.

"Ok sweetheart see you there love you ." Was what Eddie told her before hanging up .

The drive to Hawkins University was about 30 min from The house so it was taking them a while and Dani started to get more anxious because the same pickup truck was following them for the longest time and this wasn't a coincidence at all now.Dani kept checking the rear view mirror more than she had too feeling nervous and scared .Because now she knew the truck was actually following them .

Dani prayed whoever it was for it to be a coincidence but she look back discreetly once again and saw the truck still following and caught glimpse of Nate taking off his seatbelt .

"Hey Nate put in your seatbelt on please." Dani told him

"Momma lyric drop her bottle ." He answered and the moment Dani looked back the unexpected happen from the corner of her eye she saw the same pick up truck accelerate and hit them on the back and Dani lost control of the car and the only thing In her head was her kids and Ozzy .When she got control of the wheel once again, it was too late the truck hit her again making them flip over twice .Everything happened in a matter of seconds .The screams of her son,the cries of her daughter and ozzy's little cries was what was in her head when they flip Over .She tried to help Nate by taking her seatbelt off she knew Nate had taken his seatbelt off to get his sister's bottle but she wasn't fast enough on the last flip Dani flew off through the broken windshield .The last thing she saw was her car flipped over on the road and Nate unconscious bleeding , Ozzy unconscious and the cries of her daughter still on the car seat. with her last strength she tried to crawl as close as she could To the car, that's when she saw two people getting her daughter's car seat with her daughter inside .she tried to scream but nobody heard her the people continue walking with the car seat.

"Lyric!!" She scram but nothing "lyric!!" She scram once again .

"Nate!!" She cried but Nate didn't wake up.Nate was still in the car with his plushie in his hand.There as blood on his face.Nate was unconscious Dani's heart beating faster than normal .Wanting to reach her son needing to know if he was ok .

Dani scram like she had never scram before she was feeling hopeless she wasn't able to move .Her whole body hurt She didn't know what to do.

From The corner of her eye she saw Ozzy chasing the people That took her daughter and the was the last thing she saw before falling unconscious.

Meanwhile Eddie was barely getting to his Car calling Dani but she never answered ,he even called Nate and no answer .

He checked Nate's location and they were close to the campus .

Eddies chest started hurting but not in a bad way but in a bad feeling kind of way .He called once again but no answer so he drove off following Nate's location.Then he heard sirens and saw ambulances and firefighters passing by him.His heart started beating faster by the minute .He continued following Nate's location and it was the same way the ambulances and firefighters were going .He was about to cry about to scream he didn't know what he was feeling he wanted to get as fast as possible to his family .

But he couldn't get any closer to where Nate's location was because they had close the street the same firefighters and ambulances where there .

Eddie stop and park his car on the side of the road and got down with his cellphone on his hand still following Nate's location.With Tears on his eyes ,he didn't even know why he was crying .

"Sir ,you can't be here ." He heard a muffled voice tell him,but he didn't listen and continued walking that's when he saw a red Altima flipped over .

"Sir ." He heard once again but ignore the voice following Nate's location that stop in the car that was flip over .

He tried to run but someone stop him.

"Let me go!!" He shouted

"You can't be here ."the police officer that was restraining Eddie told him .

"That's my family." He sobbed "that's my kids!!" He shouted falling to his knees .

The police officer let go of him and tried to calm him down but Eddie wasn't listening he got up and ran to the car where he saw the paramedics getting Nate out of the car unconscious bleeding from his head .He had other injuries in his arms and legs .

Eddie ran to him but the paramedics push him

Away ."Sir you can't be here ." They told him once again.Eddie couldn't understand why they kept telling him that .If that was family .

"Nate!!" He shouted but Nate wouldn't wake up ."what's wrong with him?" Eddie asked but the paramedics couldn't answer his question .All they knew was that he was alive but wasn't waking up .When they pick up the stretcher The plushie Nate had holding fell to the ground.It was stain with blood .Eddie saw it fall and pick it up hugging it tight.He didn't care it had blood on him.

Everything stop for awhile Eddie saw everyone around him moving .He saw paramedics running around he saw officers with dogs running towards the forest.Then his eyes were back to Nate's Paramedics performing cpr on him.

"Nate !!" He shouted but someone stoped him

"Sir ,you need to calm down." He heard muffled voices tell him. he turned around to face the officer next to

Him."M-my fiancée m-my daughter ." Was all Eddie said through sobs .

"He needs to be taken to the hospital as soon as possible ,there's internal bleeding." Eddie stared at the paramedics attending Nate .He gasped when he saw the paramedic lift up Nate's shirt he had a piece of glass on his side of the stomach and was bleeding too much even he knew that wasn't a good sign .All he saw was she paramedics rushing Nate inside the ambulance .

Eddie hadn't realized he was crying until A detective that was on the scene saw him and walked over to Eddie trying to calm him down and explain to him What had happened .

"M-my daughter ."

"Your wife is in the ambulance paramedics are making sure everything is fine but she has some serious injuries and your son is in critical condition and what do you mean by your daughter ?" The detective asked

"My fiancée was meeting me for lunch with my kids and dog ." Was all Eddie said

"There was only two people in the scene your fiancée and your son." The detective told him.

"No,no ,no."Eddie shook his head "They were ." He sobs ,By now Eddie wasn't crying he didn't know what was going on with him he couldn't comprehend what was going on what do they mean they don't know about their daughter and Ozzy .

Eddie ran to the car  kneeling down in front of the car he crawl inside screaming lyrics and ozzy's name but they weren't there .He kept Nate's plushie on his hand not wanting to let go of it .

"Sir you need to get out please ." He heard someone say .But he wouldn't get out .He heard firefighters telling him. It wasn't safe that there was a leak and the car could Explode ,But he couldn't understand why his daughter and Ozzy weren't in here .

He felt someone grab his legs and pull

Him out that's when he saw Lyrics bottle and grabbed it .

The paramedics pull him out screaming a him god knows what because Eddie wasn't listening he was hysterical .

"T-this is my daughters ." Was all he said

The detective took the bottle from Eddie and ran over to another person .

Eddie got up and ran towards the ambulance that was still there and saw Dani in really bad condition her beautiful long hair a mess dirty with her blood .

"Sir you can't be here ." Once again they told

Him.

"She is my wife !!" He shouted

"Sir I'm gonna need you to calm down ,we are heading to Indianapolis hospital you can meet us there your son is on his way already ." Eddie ran back to his car putting Nate's plushie in the passenger seat and drove off to the hospital thinking maybe his daughter and Ozzy where there already .

He drove as fast as he could ignoring the stop lights .The whole way he was a mess,Eddie was trying his best to calm down .He dialed Steve's number .

"Hello." Steve answered

"H-Harrington ." Eddie sob

"Munson what's going on ?" Steve ask panic

Eddie couldn't make words and this was scaring Steve .Steve was now thinking the worse.His heart started beating faster and the first thing that came to his head was Dani and the kids .

"What happen to Dani and the kids ?"

"They were in an accident t-they are taking t-them to Indianapolis hospital ."

"On my way ." Steve said and hung up and jump

Over the counter ,he was working at the moment .He didn't care Keith was there he just jumped over the counter not caring if dropped anything to the ground.

He ran to his car and drove to the hospital .

When Eddie got to the hospital nobody knew anything about his daughter and Ozzy the only thing they told him was that Dani and Nate had to go into surgery .

"Surgery?" He asked

"We don't have a lot of information right now but as soon as we do we promise to come back and let you know ." A nurse told Eddie and Eddie just nodded .

Eddie was a mess he didn't know how everything was ok then turned into a mess he walked over to the waiting area where he leaned against the wall and slid down to the ground crying covering his eyes with his hands sobbing Nate's plushie still on his hands .

"Mr.Munson ."he heard the same voice of the detective

Eddie didn't pick up his head ,he continue crying not caring who saw him .

"We found your daughter's car seat ." When Eddie heard that he got up so fast like never before .

"Where is she ? "

The detective looked at him Then look down then back at him With a sad looked "we found her car seat but she wasn't in there ."

"What do you mean she wasn't in the car seat?" Eddie asked not understanding how they found his daughter car seat but not his daughter .

"We also found this ." The detective handed ozzy's service dog vest to Eddie which had stains of blood .

Eddie thought the worst and once again felt to the ground hugging the vest that belonged to Ozzy and Nate's plushie crying his heart out .

"Eddie !! Son !!" He heard that familiar voice that always soothed him When he was at his worst .

"Wayne ." Eddie looked up hair a mess tears stained cheeks .

"Son" he knelt down next to Eddie wrapping his arms around his nephew "I'm here ,I'm here ."

"My f-family ." Was all Eddie said .

Wayne looked up At the detective "what happen ?" He asked

"We think it was a hit a run ,but in my opinion it was intentional ." The detective answered

"Why would you say that ?" Wayne's asked still hugging his nephew tightly while

He cried in his arms .

"We found writing in the side of the car that said this ." The detective gives a picture of the scene to Wayne with his free hand Wayne gets it and he sees in big letter the word "WHORE." Written in the red Altima

Wayne gasped seeing the condition the car was in and the blood on the ground .Tears escape his eyes seeing all that blood wondering who it belonged too .

Eddie got the picture from Wayne's hand and stared at

it .He hadn't realized that he never saw the letters in the car .He was too worried to even care about anything else .

"We also found this ."

The detective hands Wayne a piece of paper .

"Whores like you don't belong In Hawkins ,whores who committed sin don't belong here we told

You to leave but you didn't listen,it didn't have to be this way ."

Wayne read the words over and over again but couldn't understand why people Would do this to Dani and his nephew .He couldn't understand why they would treat them like criminals .

Eddie got up snatching the letter from Wayne scrunching it into a ball and throwing it to the ground.

The detective picked it up he didn't say anything to Eddie he understood what he was going through .

After 30 minutes Liam,Mrs.Henderson, Dustin and Steve ran into the waiting area asking for questions Wayne was the one who answer her questions because Eddie wasn't talking to anyone he was just staring blankly at the wall.

Eddie's eyes went to Mrs.Henderson when she heard her cries she was inconsolable especially with Knowone telling them information about Dani and her grandkids .

Liam was being strong but tears still fell

From his face his son and Dani where in bad condition he tried asking everyone for information he asked the nurses but nobody knew anything because they where still in surgery he felt useless .

He sat in the waiting area wiping away his tears waiting for answers waiting for anything.

Steve sat next to Dustin hugging his small friend who was in tears .Steve was also being strong for Eddie and the Hendersons but it was too hard right now his best friend and his nephew were in critical condition and they couldn't find his niece .

As the minutes passed they started to get more frustrated with no answers ,uncle Wayne started worrying about his nephew because he wasn't crying anymore but just staring blankly at the wall and not letting go of Ozzy vest and Nate's plushie .

Nobody knows how much time has passed but it seem like hours.

"Mr.Munson." The same detective walked into the waiting area and Eddie got up so fast and so did everyone else .

"Did you find my granddaughter ?" Mrs.Henderson asked "Chief Hopper did a search and rescue and they found a trail of blood so we are heading that way ."the detective told them.

"I'm going with you ."Eddie said "and I'm not taking no for an answer." He said but before leaving he handed Liam Ozzy's vest and Nate's plushie .Liam looked down at the two things in his hands and started crying ."Go find lyric." He managed to say and that's what Eddie did Him ,Steve and uncle Wayne all went in Uncle Wayne's  truck following the detective back to where the accident happen .liam had stayed with Mrs.Henderson and Dustin making sure they will be ok .

When they arrived at the site ,Hopper was there already with a few other people who had done a search and rescue .

When Eddie saw him he ran up to him wanting to know answers .

"D-did you find my daughter ?"

He asked voice shaky trying his best not to cry and be strong .

"Sorry kid we haven't but we did find a trail of blood leading to Rick's house ." Hopper told Eddie and in that moment Eddie didn't care about anything he ran and ran and ran not caring how far Rick's house was he didn't stop even when he heard his name being called .

Hopper didn't want him to go afraid of what he was going to find .

Wayne got in his truck with steve and driving off to Rick's  house .uncle Wayne tried to drive as fast as he could he didn't want his nephew to be alone if something had happen to his granddaughter .He wanted to be there to console him.But he prayed that his granddaughter was safe .

Steve was  in Tears already praying to God that his niece was ok he wasn't a believer but now he was, he was putting all his faith in God praying that Dani and her kids to be ok Even Ozzy who Steve knows Nate loves to death .

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Back at the Hospital Liam and the Hendersons haven't gotten no answers from the doctors only that Dani was out of surgery and in recovery but nothing from Nate .

Liam couldn't believe what was happening he couldn't believe what people Could do just for a mistake Dani did .For falling in love with her student .At this moment Liam hated even more Eddie because of him his family was in here because of him everything happen .

If Dani hadn't set eyes on him none of this would have happen everything was his fault .But Liam couldn't blame everything on Eddie because he knew Dani had fault in this too she wasn't force to date him she did it because she loves him.

Liam held tight ozzys vest and Nate's plushie on his hand crying not caring anyone saw him.He didn't care because he was hurting and he was scared not knowing if his son was ok .

Nobody understood how people could be so cruel .

————

Eddie ran until He couldn't, he stop trying to grasp for air the night had fallen already and it scare him even more because it started getting colder and his daughter was alone out there in the night without him and Dani .

Eddie ran again when he felt he was ready but tripped with a branch falling to the ground,that's when he saw blood in the ground .he got up fast following the trail that lead him to Rick's house and into the boat house where the door was open he ran towards the boat house and inside Was Ozzy curl up and shivering.

Eddie approached him slowly wanting to know if he was ok but Ozzy growled as if he was trying to protect something or someone .

"Ozzy it's me boy " Eddie said softly trying not to scared the poor dog .But Ozzy growled once again as he was protecting something or someone.

Eddie  slowly reached Ozzy to tried to calm him and let him know he was ok .The closer he got to Ozzy he could see he was the one bleeding from his back leg.

Eddie then saw headlights and that scared Ozzy even more. Then footsteps approaching the boat house made Ozzy growled .

Eddie turned around to see who it was .

When he saw the detective ,hopper, his uncle and Steve he told them to stop where they where that they where scaring Ozzy.

"His injured ." Eddie told Hopper

Eddie then turned back to Ozzy who curled up even .When he move his paw Eddie saw something that caught his attention .

"Lyric." He gasped

Hopper and else else tried to remained calmed ,praying that lyric was fine .

"Ozzy,c'mere boy."Eddie said softly Ozzy then started wagging his tail and got up slowly limping over to Eddie .That when Eddie saw Ozzy's back leg still bleeding .

The trail of blood was ozzy's all this time it look as if he was shot .Eddie got closer to Ozzy who seem to relaxed when he realized it was Eddie.

Eddie pet Ozzy softly and then signal Steve to come get him.

"Steve ." Eddie said softly ,trying his best not to scare Ozzy .

Steve walked in slowly approaching Eddie "get Ozzy he is injured ." Eddie told him .

Steve approached Ozzy slowly trying his best not to scare him but Ozzy seem Like he knew they where there to help Him so he walk slowly limping towards Steve.Thats when Eddie got lyric and carried her and started checking her, but she only seem to have some scratches and bruises .

Steve carried Ozzy out of the boat house carefully not to hurt him.But Ozzy started barking when they heard a branch break thats when Steve saw someone crawling away and shouted for hopper .

Hopper ran to where Steve saw the person and that's where he found a man wearing a black hoodie injured in the ground bleeding from his leg apparently Ozzy hat bitten him bad and he shot ozzy .

"She made do it ,I'm sorry ." Was what the man said ..

~~~~~~~~~~~

Steve and hopper drove Ozzy to the local veterinarian to get checked .while Eddie and uncle Wayne drove back to Indianapolis hospital to get lyric check .

When Eddie and uncle Wayne arrived at the Hospital the nurses rushed to check on lyric .Taking her from Eddie's arms at first he didn't want to let go of her.

"Son it's ok they are going to check her ." He said softly to Eddie trying his best not to trigger him.

"Ok." Eddie said softly and handed lyric to one of the nurses and watched her taking lyric .

"Let's go get you wash ." Uncle Wayne grab Eddie by his arm leading him to the man's restroom where they spend at least 30 minutes washing off the blood Eddie's hands and Eddie crying his heart out .

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As the morning approached still There was no news about Dani and Nate and now lyric's.it has been 7hrs since the nurses took Lyric and there was nothing yet nobody could tell them anything yet .

Around 10am a doctor walked into the waiting area where The Henderson ,Liam ,uncle Wayne and Eddie have been waiting .

"Munson ."The doctor said and everyone stood up fast ."For Danielle Henderson and Nate Dornan?" The doctor asked

"Yes,I'm his father ."Liam answered

"Dani is my fiancée ." Eddie said softly

The doctor nodded and instructed Liam and Eddie to follow him to his office .

They both follow quietly not saying anything to each other .

They quietly enter the office and sat down in the chairs they waited patiently for the doctor who was stopped by a nurse right outside his office .

When the doctor came into the office ,he sat in his office chair behind his desk "I just got some great news your daughter lyric is doing perfectly fine just some scratches and bruising but we want to keep her for another two days to keep an eye on her ." Eddie felt a great relive hearing this but now he needed to know about Dani and Nate .

"What about my son and fiancée ." Eddie asked

The doctor took his glasses off and pinch the bridge of his nose "your fiancée just got out of surgery a few minutes ago she has a broken leg ,broken ribs she was stabbed by a tree branch in her leg, she also had a concussion,she hit hear head pretty hard"Eddie felt his heart breaking he wish he could take all the pain away .

Liam was broken too hearing how hurt Dani was .But he also wanted to know about his son .

"H-how's Nate ?" Eddie was the one that asked

That doctor sigh and stood up and sat in the desk looking at both Liam and Eddie .

"Nate is a strong boy he has a broken leg also a broken arm and broken ribs he also hit his head pretty hard he had some internal bleeding but we were able to stop it ,he also has a big cut on the side of his stomach he was cut by a pieces of glass from the car and lost a lot of blood ,we where able to stabilize him."the doctor pauses and looks at Eddie then at Liam ."The boy is in a coma ." That was the last thing Eddie and Liam heard before they blocked out everything.

Next chapter

[1800titz]

Hi! I’ve read everything you’ve posted and I’m on patreon and your stuff is very *chefs kiss* and such creative story lines! I had one thought the other day and I mean this as like. Helpful critique one writer to another. Like in the way that you don’t have to take this advice but I mean to help not hurt. You’re really fantastic at using creative imagery and unique words and you write very poetically. And most of the time it’s so good. But every once in a while it feels like a bit much - like I just want to know where he’s actually touching her or what they are actually doing. Like sometimes it takes a while to get to the actual action or narrative. Other times it’s really beautiful and flows so nicely and you create a really wonderful rhythm with it as well. You use it as a great narrative tool. But yeah in a *critique* way not a *complain/mean* way, you might want to consider pulling back and occasionally putting in some simpler more direct language. Especially at like the climax of a scene when I’m thinking “hurry up I want to know what happens next!” Bc you’ve told such a good story and I want to know! In the same way that the poetic language is a wonderful tool for some things, I think the simpler more direct language can be a great tool for other things. And by incorporating both it might make it more interesting to read. I had a professor talk about how when you change the style of language the reader doesn’t always notice that, but they do notice that the mood is different.

Again I LOVE your work and I intend this to be helpful not hurtful and you know yourself and your work best so if you don’t want to do anything with these thoughts that’s so valid!!

Hi! This is totally valid and I want to thank you for the support and for writing this in such a polite, friendly manner, because other times people don't do it so nicely.

I think I can understand where you're coming from. That being said, I also definitely make purposeful, lyrical prose choices. I'll probably never be able to understand why when you google "purple prose," the first thing to come up is "how to avoid purple prose," because to me, most literature that I enjoy borders on purple prose, if it already isn't. Like, genuinely, the kind of prose that other people hate and actively try to avoid, I will actively look for. It's just a preference thing. It's what I enjoy reading from others, it's what I enjoy writing. I think writing and reading stylistic decisions/preferences are entirely subjective, and I can also agree with you that a line of "he smiles" or "he holds her hand," as opposed to a chunk of flowery narrative, can add a delicate touch of simplicity here and there that I can appreciate. I think, as writers, we're always evolving and experimenting with our stylistic choices. I also am totally down with re-writes, and going back months later to edit things, and add new things, and take whole chunks out altogether, because I feel like that is the essence of writing, and I've done it before for sure! I go back, and I rewrite, and I put things in, and remove things, even if they're already uploaded. I've noticed a lack of ~simplicity~ in the earlier patreon posts for sure, which is why I go through, and edit here and there, and add things, and take things out. That being said, I purposefully avoid depicting actions a lot of the time, unless it's in a passage of smut (where it's mostly touch and movement and it makes sense to spell things out), because those things kind of unfold on their own in my opinion, if that makes sense. You can illustrate the movement occurring in a scene in three or four words if you wanted to, but you can't sense the depth of an emotion/turmoil/context in the same way, which is why that is a massive, massive part of my passages. I absolutely do not claim to be a pro in anything by any means, in any shape or form. I'm well aware that there are people out there who don't like my writing style at all. I just write things the way that I would enjoy to read them, and the way that make my brain happy. The fact there are people out there who enjoy it enough to subscribe and support me is unfathomably flattering, and I am really grateful for that.

But yeah! I totally get what you're saying, and I am no stranger to changing things and trying new things and growing out of/into new things. I agree that direct, simple language here and there can add a nice touch, and I'm totally open to incorporating a "he smiles" or "he holds her hand" here and there. The flowery metaphors and imagery along scenes are just a purposeful stylistic choice that I couldn't ever bear to part with.

Thank you again for supporting me and sending this in a really kindly worded way! <3

[waugh-bao]

i’m really sorry you’re going through such an awful situation with your google account. i genuinely hope you can get your account back! 🙏

to get your mind off everything: 6, 15, and 24 for the ask game! <3

Thank you <3 A friend is trying to help me (crazy scheme attaching a new SIM to the GiffGaff account I apparently never deactivated 6 years ago), so I’m hoping that pans out. It’s a very good lesson to back everything up from now on in multiple places and to make sure all my 2 factor authentication info is up to date.

6. is there/what is a song that you secretly love but you hate to admit it?

“Cœur d’occasion” by Marc Lavoine. I don’t hate Marc Lavoine by any means, and he seems to be a pretty solid person (hugely involved in charity and that video of him crying when Enrico Macias sings “Le Gens du Nord” to him kills me), but his music tends to be too pop and produced for me. That said, I actually quite like the lyrics of the song and the music video is a guilty pleasure for me, in a kind of very French girl power sort of way.

15. what is a song you are obsessed with at the moment?

“No Wicked Grin” by John Hiatt. I saw him at the start of June (hate that that was already more than a month ago) and he was spectacular. Particularly for an elderly guy who had a TBI only about a year ago. I adore so many of his songs, but this was the only one he played in his 2 hour solo acoustic set that I didn’t know and I fell in love with it. It’s gorgeous and it doesn’t hurt that it gives me real Keith-Charlie vibes.

24. How many hours a day would you say you spend listening to music?

It depends a lot on the day. I absolutely can’t listen to music when I’m doing homework or PhD work, unless it’s something very mindless like organizing documents in Trophy, and I tend to listen to podcasts more when I’m walking to school or doing errands. But a lot when I run/am in the gym, write fic, and as a pleasure in itself. So probably 1 hour minimum and up to 10 or 12.

[imtalkin]

***Spoilers***

Do not read if you don’t want Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind spoiled for you!

First of all here’s the plot ->

“After a painful breakup, Clementine (Kate Winslet) undergoes a procedure to erase memories of her former boyfriend Joel (Jim Carrey) from her mind. When Joel discovers that Clementine is going to extremes to forget their relationship, he undergoes the same procedure and slowly begins to forget the woman that he loved.”

1. The switching and jumping around the timeline made the whole thing really confusing for me. They try to remind you of where the movie is by the color of Clementine’s hair but I still felt confused half the time. The movie needs to be watched at least twice I think to really absorb everything.

2. The movie has obvious science fiction elements to it because of the memory erasing. There’s a place you can go to get someone erased from your brain and a whole procedure is done. In the new teaser for Ariana’s next single, she’s clearly at that place or something similar to it. She signs her name Peaches and I think that’s just a reference to Clementine (fruit names hehe). She’s actually wearing a coat extremely similar to one Clementine wears at one part of the movie!

3. There’s genuinely so many meanings you could pull from this movie that it’s difficult to narrow it down. When you just google the meaning of it it says, “Relationships are worth it despite the pain”. I really think since Ariana said this will be a concept album that that’s the message she’ll be trying to send.

4. There’s a part near the end where an employee sends everyone’s files back to them because she finds out she decided to have her own memory erased. She realized she was happy before it even though she went through some pain. She wanted everyone else to remember their relationships or whoever they’ve decided to erase because it’s just worth it. Life is worth feeling even if it hurts. Trying to forget someone almost hurts more than just processing your grief and remembering that there was some happiness. Just like the Taylor swift song, Happiness -> “there’ll be happiness after you but there was happiness because of you too”.

4. I’m really really excited for the album now! I know I spoiled some stuff about the movie but it is 100% worth watching and just know it’s going to be really painful but worth it I think. I’m gonna post the track list picture again because I think the lyrics scribbled on the side are very relevant to the movie! Specifically, “Now I can’t just go where you don’t go”.

The last thing I’ll say is this quote from the movie ☀️

“How happy is the blameless vestal's lot! The world forgetting, by the world forgot. Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind! Each prayer accepted, and each wish resigned.”

TLDR : the movie is about how any relationship is worth the pain you might go through. I think any ariana fan should watch it before listening to her new album. She’s stated that it’s a concept album loosely based on this movie.

[cantankerouscatfish]

tagged by @sad--ghost--kid ✨

rules: tag 10 people you want to get to know better

relationship status: single! I don’t play well with others.

favorite color: #006688. teals and blues in general. also orange. :)

song stuck in my head: Gregory Alan Isakov - In Tall Buildings. it’s a cover but I like it more lmao

last song i listened to: Matthew Good - Los Alamos. been hopping around on youtube, listening to him for like 3 days now. this happens sometimes. help.

three favorite foods: jeez uh. 1. this one soup made from roasted eggplant, tomato, onion, and garlic. you put goat cheese on it. it’s SO fancy but so filling. 2. corned beef & cabbage idk. everyone’s making it now and it’s tasty. 3. just like. baked squash or sweet potato with some butter on it maybe. orange goop. 👍

last thing i googled: the lyrics to Los Alamos lmao

dream trip: before covid, my mum and I planned to drive up through Michigan in October to catch the leaves changing and hopefully see some parks and stuff before they closed down for the winter. we’d done the same out to Boston and Bar Harbor in years previous. uhhh but now that is on indefinite standby. :(

anything i want right now: my back to stop hurting?? idk. nothing pressing atm.

tagging if you'd like to share!

hi @neriad13, @dashingdetectivetimelady, @roshi-no-tabi, @blujayonthewing, @cynicalwindmill, @processintegrated, @ragsy, ? ?? idk sorry if this bothers anyone