#don’t be fucking self aware I’ll tear your eyes out

[reallysleepymermaid]

Stupid cop came in and was like “omg sowee can I pwease get these 5 orders charged separately???” And then proceeded to give me the wrong card on the first order and as I’m voiding it he’s like “omg I’m so sorry I’m not that bright I’m a law enforcement officer so obviously I’m not that bright 🤪” and I was like if you don’t shut your stupid pig mouth right now-

[emmyrosee]

So Urm just a thought u got any…. Deep non curse sukuna angst I think it’s a good day to cry.

-anon🥢

Sukuna is nothing if not self sabotaging.

Things with you have been good. Borderline perfect; you’re the missing piece to the life he’s cursed to live, where he’s always self aware of his weaknesses and takes them out on those around him. There is no blessing, not when all he does it hurt. It’s a miracle yuuji and choso deal with his shit enough, he knows they should’ve dropped him off the face of the earth with the pain he causes.

Now, it seems, it’s your turn.

Your turn to be on the receiving end of his fury, his rage and heartbreak, your only chance to escape being to leave him; maybe that’s all he wants: you to leave him.

He stopped calling you. Stopped answering texts. When his brothers and parents ask about you, he merely stays silent, opting against making you sound more divine than they know you are.

You’re perfect. You’re not for him.

Theres a pounding on the door that goes unanswered by everyone in the house, and he groans as he gets up to answer it, only to reveal your frame in the door.

You look distraught. You’re angry, he can see that in your eyes, there’s a betrayal buried deep in them. Your face holds a scowl and your breathing picks up at the sight of him.

“You’ve been avoiding me.”

Sukuna rolls his eyes and walks away from the open door, knowing you’ll follow him no matter what. “So?”

“So?” You ask, offended. “You and I are supposed to be in love, supposed to be partners in crime-“

“Im hearing a lot of ‘supposed to be,’ and not a lot of ‘have to be’” he snaps. He hears you take a breath to say something, but you don’t. He screws his eyes shut. “Get over it. I didn’t sign a contract with my blood saying I have to come to your every beck and call.”

“Sukuna. Stop.”

“Stop what?”

“Being an asshole,” you say firmly. “Let me in. I’m here. What’s going on?”

“I’m sick of you.”

At his blunt words, you gasp, and sukuna feels the bile rise up his throat. He’ll do anything though. Anything to make you stop loving him. “What…?”

“I’m sick. Of you,” he echos. “You checking up on me, demanding we go out, flaunting me off to your friends like I’m some damn trophy-“

“Because I love you!” You hiss. “I want to show you off, make the world see how lucky I am to have you!”

“‘Show me off?’” He cackles, spinning on his heel to face you. “There’s nothing to show. I am nothing to you. You, are nothing to me.”

You reel back at his words, waterline swelling with tears as you are wounded by his words. “You think because I take you out on a few dates, we kissed a little and I held that little hand of yours, that you’re anything special to me?” He shakes his head with a cruel chuckle, “I’ve done that to every broad I’ve ever been with. You’re not special. Never were anything more than a body to me.”

You puff out your chest like an animal trying to protect itself, “then what about the nights we cuddled?” You demand. “What about our late night trips to McDonald’s or 7/11? What about the nights you cried in my chest about your miseries and hardships, and I carded your hair and cradled you close to my body?”

“What about them!” He yells, the cracks in his confidents breaking. Those moments mean the world to him, and for him to now force you to use them against him has his blood running cold. “Yeah, I let you see the softer bits of me. Who cares?”

“I do!” You wail. “Because it made me think, for one second, that we could be something special! Something we earned and worked for together!”

“I think you forget,” he snarls, “I lived a fine life without you in it. We can go right fucking back the minute you started thinking this bullshit.”

You flinch at the harshness of his words. It’s working. Sukuna feels it. The love you have for him dwindling, the connection being frayed and severed with every pass of his words-

“Then do it,” you whisper. “If your life was so great loveless, then go back. But just know, I’ll never stop loving you. Ever. You’ll never have the peace of the freedom of heartbreak when it comes to me.”

With that, you take a step back, followed by another, but your eyes never leave his. Your bottom lip wobbles and you grab your coat over the back of his chair. He watches as you cover your mouth with your hand before dashing out, slamming the door behind you and leaving a trail of tears. His eyes are fixed on the door that’s finally stopped shaking on its hinges from the slam, as if waiting for you to sweep back in and demand his love, demand him to care and want you back.

But it doesn’t come. You don’t come back.

He can’t fight the urge to swipe everything off the counter with his arms in a fury, plates and cups flying off and shattering under the force. He pants like a voracious beast, angry and predatory, but he’s grounded as he steps on a shard of crystal from his mom’s wine glass.

And now, rather than chase you down the street, begging for your forgiveness, he sits down, using his hands to pick up the bigger shards. There’s an unfamiliar trickling down his cheek of hot tears, one splatters to the floor, and that’s it. Sukuna, with the monster he worked so hard to keep at bay, ruins another paradise in his life.

He cries alone.

All alone.

[tootiecakes234]

Katsuki’s POV:

I fucking hate myself. I was never supposed to become this type of sick idiot.

But here I am, across the room staring at her because she’s laughing, and it’s one of those full body laughs. She’s not trying to cover her face or stifle it at all. Sometimes she gets self conscious about her laugh being too weird or too loud but she couldn’t give two fucks about that right now and I physically cant tear my eyes away from her.

I’m aware that Eijirou is talking to me, but I’m not hearing anything he’s saying. It’s not until Denki’s face pops up in my line of vision that I finally snap out of what ever fucking trance the temptress had put on me.

“Baku-bro you should really close your mouth before something flies in it.” Denki says with a goofy grin on his face.

“Yea well, you should close your mouth before I shove my fist in it dumbass.”

“Hey, leave him alone. He’s in love.” And Eiji bumps his shoulder up against me. “It’s super manly.”

“Do you idiots ever shut up and mind your business?” I shout because I hate being called out about her. I swear I’m trying my best to not follow her around like a lost puppy but all that does is have me tracking her around with me eyes like a goddamn stalker.

“Dude, no one is saying it’s a bad thing. She’s super hot. Sometimes you can’t help but stare at her.” Denki says with a smirk on his face. He’s goading me. “ but you know what’s better than staring… touching. I might just run over and give her a big old hu- woah dude. I’m kidding calm down.”

My hands grabbing the front of his shirt and I can feel the sparks about to start flying from my hand. Then I feel a soft hand on my forearm and the effect she has on me is immediate.

I cut my eyes over and catch her smiling at me and just like that the sparks stop because I’ll be damned if I ever do anything that might end up hurting her.

“Kats… what have we said about hurting our friends….. they may be stupid but that doesn’t give us a right to kick their asses right???” She’s speaking slowly like she’s trying to talk down a jumper.

“Yea Kats. Don’t beat up your friends.” Denki’s smug voice caused my hand with his shirt to clench a little tighter.

“Denki dude. You’ve gotta cut it out before he murders you.” Eiji says that like he’s trying to help but the asshole is also snickering.

Then the hand on my forearm slides up my arm, across my chest and ends up wrapping around my neck and that’s it. She’s got me.

“Come on bub. I’m hungry, let’s go get food. Leave the evil men to cause chaos amongst themselves.” Then she’s pulling me away and all I can do is follow.

I turn my head quick tho and shout, “watch your back dunts face. I still owe you an ass whoopin!”

“Yea yea lover boy.” And his friends chuckle behind him.

And that’s what i am now isn’t it? It’s what she’s turned me into. A man so deep in fucking love that all she had to do was say the word and I’d fall to my fucking knees for her.

This shit is so embarrassing🙄

Katsuki Masterlist

Tag List: @dreamcastgirl99 @xxvendettaxx @justbepeace @i-literally-cant-with-this @moonpieshawdy @theloveofnagiseishiroslife @b134ch-m4h-ey3z @quirklestrash @lotionlamp @facinated-lemon @bakugouswaif @mintsbubbletea @anon-mouse223 @darkstarlight82

If you want to be added to taglist let me know🤭

[solarmorrigan]

If you’re still taking prompts, could I ask for “please come get me” with Steddie?

I’ve read over all your other angst prompts and just about died this morning, you’re so good at the pain!!

Hello! :D Thank you for the prompt! I'm afraid this one is a little heavier on the comfort than the hurt, so perhaps not as much pain, but if you've been binging what I've written so far, maybe that's a good thing?? But anyway, I hope this is alright!

[Warning for implied child neglect/emotional abuse. Nothing really happens in the fic, but just as a heads up]

Angsty-ish Prompt List

-

Eddie shouldn’t be hearing this. This isn’t a conversation meant for spectators.

“I know you just got back from a trip, I just–” Harrington says into the receiver of the payphone, clinging to the handset as he practically wilts against the useless ‘privacy wall’ next to it. “I’m sorry, I was just hoping you could give me a ride home.”

All Eddie had wanted to do was cut the pep rally like any self-respecting social outcast would, except he couldn’t just ditch and go home; it’s Friday, and he has Hellfire after this. But the last thing he’d expected while loitering around outside, waiting for the pep rally to end, had been to stumble across Steve Harrington on the phone, practically begging someone for a ride home.

“No, I drove myself here today, I’m just not sure I can drive home.” Harrington pauses, then sighs. “No, Dad, this is a pep rally, I haven’t been drinking.” Whatever comes down the line next makes his posture snap straight almost immediately, before he hunches back in on himself with a wince and a hand pressed to his forehead. “No, sir. I’m sorry, sir.”

This is weird. This is so weird. Harrington is meant to be cocky – confident and in-charge and at ease, not curled around a payphone in the same way a kicked puppy tries to protect itself even as it asks someone for more attention.

Someone who is apparently his dad.

It’s just – weird. It’s like how you know a lemon is a citrus fruit, just the same as an orange, but the second you peel off the rind, you feel like you’ve seen something forbidden. Lemons aren’t meant to be peeled that way, and Harrington isn’t meant to look close to tears while trying to get someone to drive him home.

“I – I’m sick. I mean, it’s – I have a migraine,” Harrington explains haltingly. “No, it’s not just – yeah, my head hurts, but if it was just that, I swear I wouldn’t bother you, I just – I’m dizzy, and my vision’s all blurry, so I’m not sure I can drive, and I don’t…”

Shit, that sounds kind of fucked up. Eddie frowns, leaning against the wall he’s been peering around, now definitely intentionally eavesdropping. Harrington is frowning, too, rubbing a frustrated hand over his face.

“Tommy and I don’t hang out anymore, we haven’t in over a year,” Harrington says, then carries on a little more quietly, a little more subdued, “and there isn’t really anyone else here I can catch a ride with, either.”

Eddie will admit he hasn’t been paying a whole lot of attention, but anyone who doesn’t live under a rock knows that Harrington’s popularity had taken a bit of a hit last year, when he’d ditched Hagan and Perkins and decided to be a bit less of a dick. And then this year – well, even if Hargrove hadn’t crowed enough about the fight between the two of them, the state of Harrington’s face back in November had spoken volumes. Still, Eddie hadn’t been aware the condition of Harrington’s social life was so dire.

“I’m not – I’m not making this up, the doctor talked to you about this, he– I’m not trying to talk back, I just– Dad, please, can you just – please, come get me,” Harrington stutters through what sounds very much like a losing argument before going silent altogether, pressing one hand over his eyes as he lets his head hang, the other still holding the handset near his ear. “I understand,” he says dully after a minute. “I’m sorry. I’ll – I’ll figure it out… Yes, sir.”

It doesn’t seem like there’s much left to say after that. Harrington hangs up the phone and leans up against the adjacent wall before sliding down and sitting himself right there on the ground, knees drawn up and face in his hands.

Shit.

Eddie ducks back around the corner, gnawing on his lip, caught in indecision. He shouldn’t have overheard any of that, intentionally or otherwise, but now that he has, he can’t just – not do something.

Can he?

He tries to tell himself it’s not his problem, that Harrington’s certainly never done him any favors, even if he’d never been a dick to Eddie specifically, but it doesn’t work. All Eddie can see is the defeated slump of Harrington’s shoulders, the helpless way he’d just sort of dropped to the ground, the way he’d quietly admitted there’s no one else he can ask for a ride – Eddie’s always had a soft spot for the lonely ones.

But when he rounds the corner, prepared to come up with some bullshit excuse as to why he’s out here and willing to drive Harrington home, he finds that Harrington is – gone.

Eddie glances around, but he doesn’t seem to be anywhere. Poof, vanished while Eddie had been too busy trying to decide what to do.

Well, damn.

Distantly hoping that Harrington had, indeed, figured something out, Eddie tries to put the incident out of his mind. The pep rally will be over soon, and that means Hellfire will begin, and he needs to get his head in the game.

He has no real reason to think on the incident after that, and he’s fairly successful at shoving it somewhere into the back of his mind until nearly two years later, in a setting so far removed from that spring day at the school that it might as well be in another life.

Eddie has to extricate himself from a few fans (actual fans; apparently, rumors of Satanism and returning form the dead will do wonders for the reputation of your metal band) in order to get up from the table settled near the back of The Hideout. Gareth, Jeff, and Oliver are all accounted for, enjoying their drinks and chatting with whoever’s descended upon them after their set, but Steve had disappeared ten minutes ago and has yet to make a reappearance.

Ten minutes isn’t all that long, Eddie knows logically, but after last year, after everything, it still feels a little too long. If he finds Steve and Steve tells him he’s fine, then that’s great, Eddie will leave him be. But he just wants to check.

The bathroom is a bust, empty but for one drunk swaying precariously in front of a urinal, so Eddie heads outside, where, around the side of the building, settled on the ground in a triangle of sodium-glow orange thrown off by a nearby streetlight, he finds his quarry.

Steve is sitting with his back to the rough wood façade of the bar, his knees drawn up in front of him and his head leaned back against the wall behind him. His eyes are closed, but there’s a little pinch of tension between his brows, and Eddie is abruptly reminded of that day, eons ago and not really that long ago at all, when all Steve had wanted was for someone to care enough to give him a ride home when he’d been sick.

Eddie finds his ass on the concrete right next to Steve before he even has the conscious thought to go over and sit down.

“Doing okay, sweetheart?” Eddie asks, picking up one of Steve’s hands from where it’s resting on his own knee (it’s safe enough right here, Eddie knows; someone would have to actively be looking for them to spot them where they’re tucked away).

If Steve is surprised to find Eddie beside him, he doesn’t show it. He turns to look at Eddie in the low light, offering him a fond little smile.

“I’m good. It was just getting to be a little much in there, so I came out here for a break,” he says.

Things like excessive noise and heat—say, the likes of which might be experienced at a concert in a crowded bar (or maybe a high school pep rally)—tend to be migraine triggers for Steve, so why he continues attending shows at The Hideout is beyond Eddie. He’s tried telling him that he doesn’t have to come, but Steve still insists he wants to make it to every performance that he can.

Eddie squeezes Steve’s hand. “You wanna head out?”

Steve shakes his head. “You’re having a good time. I don’t want to take you away from that.”

“I’m not going to be having a good time if you’re miserable.” Eddie reaches up and cups Steve’s cheek in his hand, keeping him facing in Eddie’s direction. “You’re a priority for me, you know that, right? Say the word, and we’ll go home.”

It doesn’t seem like Steve has anything to say to that; instead, he just stares at Eddie with something like wonder, as if Eddie’s just done anything more amazing than promise Steve that he’ll never have to beg for basic consideration.

“Besides,” Eddie goes on, if for no other reason than to shift the sudden weight of Steve’s reverence, “it’s not like it would be a hardship.” He leans in, pressing a kiss to Steve’s willing mouth before he continues, speaking so close that their lips are brushing. “Getting to take you home, take you to bed, lie there in the dark, just the two of us…”

Steve presses in for another kiss, long and lingering, before pulling away.

“Let’s stay a little longer,” he says. “Jeff owes me a beer, anyway.”

“Y’know,” Eddie pauses with a grunt of effort as Steve stands and uses their joined hands to pull Eddie up after him, “the only reason you knew the movie he was referencing—and, thus, the only reason he owes you a beer—is because I made you watch it.”

“And? What do you want, a medal?” Steve snarks.

“Well,” Eddie drawls, glancing Steve up and down, “some token of appreciation wouldn’t be remiss.”

Steve raises an unimpressed eyebrow at Eddie. “It would be if we did it in the alley next to a bar.”

“Wow, Harrington, mind in the gutter much? I only meant a beer,” Eddie sniffs, all exaggerated offense.

“Sure you did,” Steve says. “Now c’mon; one more beer, and then… home?”

“You got it, sweetheart,” Eddie says, offering one more quick kiss in hopes of putting any hesitation out of Steve’s mind. “One more beer, and then home.”

[gravehags]

son of perdition

Pairing: Cardinal Copia x f!Reader (Curator!Reader)

Rating: Teen

Tags: tw descriptions of vomiting, copia being a care giver, confessions and revelations, antichrist copia, curator reader series lore

Words: 1,717

Summary: And Hell followed with him.

a/n: copia is going to fist fight imperator in the street while curator reader fist fights nihil. terzo is filming the whole thing in 4k.

~~~

You don’t even last twenty-four hours with the secret Sister Imperator has burdened you with before it comes crawling back out of your gut at 3 am.

You’re already gagging when you throw the covers back and stumble into the bathroom, barely making it to the toilet in time. It takes four heaves to empty your stomach until it spasms inside you and comes to a stop as you cry and drool and spit pathetically, hunched over the bowl. You don’t even hear Copia get up, let alone hear him come into the bathroom and lean over you to flush the toilet and push your hair back.

“Poverina,” he murmurs, gently easing you backwards to slump against the cool tile wall. You’re still looking at the toilet warily as he grabs a rag from the counter and wets it, bringing it to your mouth. When you finally look at him - the way his brow is furrowed as he kneels in front of you cleaning you up - another loud sob is wrenched from you.

“Amore, what is it? What’s wrong? You were acting so strange all day before we went to bed. I know you, dolcezza, this is no stomach bug,” he says, dropping the rag as tears continue to pour down your face and he gently holds your chin, “What happened?”

None of what I’m about to tell you can leave this office.

You look at the worried face of the man you love.

He would tell you.

“C-Copia,” your voice is hoarse, “we need to talk.”

Copia looks at your tearful face and to the toilet and his eyes get wide.

“Amore, you’re not…”

“No!” you blurt out, “But…that’s part of it. Eugh…let me brush my teeth and we’ll get back in bed. I’ll explain everything, I promise. I promise, my love.”

He nods and reaches his hands out to haul you off the bathroom floor and gives you one last curious glance before shuffling back into the bedroom. Once you’ve completed your task and give yourself a long, hard look in the mirror you shut the light off and walk back to bed. Copia is sitting up with the covers pooled around his waist and your eyes flick to the tattoo on his pectoral as lead settles in your empty stomach. When you crawl in beside him he gently takes your hands in his and you take a deep breath.

“I…I don’t even know where to start.”

“Tell me everything from the moment you left my office yesterday, amore mio.”

“Right. Right. I uh. I got an email yesterday morning from Sister Imperator saying she wanted me to come to her office to talk. I thought I was, y’know, getting fired or something. It wasn’t that though. She told me…ugh,” you squeeze your eyes shut and reopen them with another deep breath, “She told me that I was…chosen. By Satan.”

“For…for what?”

“To…ugh this is so fucked up…to carry your child. She said that's why she hired me.”

The look of abject horror and fury on Copia’s face would make you physically recoil if he weren’t gripping your hands so tightly.

“She said what?” he breathes, and you swear his white eye flashes in the dim light of the bedroom. “Why the fuck…how could she say…unless...”

A self-deprecating little smirk slowly twists his lips and he exhales angrily through his nose.

“Copia she said–”

“--that I’m the Antichrist, sì?”

You’re floored. Sister Imperator had acted like this was an enormous secret that Copia was not aware of.

“Y-yeah. Yeah that’s what she said, Copia how–”

He gives you a sad smile.

“I told you I was always treated differently as a child, huh? People either treated me with kid gloves or complete derision. I’m not an idiot, I figured it out young. These, eh,” he raises his hands and displays the distinct scars on them, “were kind of a giveaway. It should be a great honor to know that the Unholy Father is…your father but all it ever did was give me grief. Eh, I suppose it beats Nihil refusing to accept that I’m his kid. Sathanas has at least been there for me - perhaps not physically but spiritually.”

“I was going to ask,” you start quietly, “I mean…you call the papas your brothers and for the longest time I just thought that was because you’ve known each other for so long but…the eyes…”

“You don’t know how the other kids at the abbey would torment me - knowing I was an Emeritus son but never being acknowledged by Nihil. Being hated by Nihil. Nothing’s fucking changed, I guess,” Copia mutters, “Nihil must have roped my mother into some ritual where he was possessed. Sathanas, what I wouldn’t give to have known her. It’s been a long, lonely life, amore. I just wanted someone to love me. Five decades on this earth of nothing but dalliances and heartache and then came…you.”

Copia looks at you with such tenderness you nearly start crying again. The truth about his mother is ready to leap from your tongue when he speaks again.

“You never saw me as, as a tool, or an inconvenience, or, or anything special–”

You’re horrorstruck.

“My love, you are more special to me than I can possibly put into words–”

“Yes, but as you said - special to you. Important to you. Not important to the faith, or important to some agenda being kept from me by the Ministry elders, eh? That was part of the gift of you being from the outside. I had a clean slate.”

“Even though apparently I was destined to be with you all along,” you say, brow furrowing, “Makes you wonder if…”

“Don’t think that,” Copia says quickly, quietly, and deadly serious as he grips your hands once more, “Amore, the most important tenet of my religion is that of free will. Nobody made you accept this job or made us fall in love. Per favore, don’t ever question that. The powers of the Olde One are great but he cannot manufacture emotion where there is none. I swear to you, amata mia.”

You nod, tears once again filling your eyes. Copia raises your hands to his mouth and kisses them.

“Anima mia,” he says, voice cracking, “Tell me…be honest. Does this news change how you feel about me?”

“Never,” you breathe, without a second thought, “Copia, nothing could change how I feel. I…I’ll be the first to admit I don’t fully understand it - not yet - but my love, you could bring about the end of days and I’ll walk into hell with you, hand in hand. I’d do anything for you, but…”

“What, what is it?” his shoulders tense and his grip on your hands tightens.

“Copia I don’t want a baby. Ever.”

His posture sags, clearly showing his relief.

“And amore I do not want anything that you do not want. Fuck the horrific reason Imperator said you were hired. And if putting your foot down was not enough for her then let her try to tell us both how she’s going to force a pregnancy on you, huh? How dare she. How dare she. Free will. Control over our own bodies. How could she twist His message like this? Not on my fucking watch.”

You give him a small smile, relief flooding your veins before you pause. You’ve revealed almost all to him but one thing still lingers. Part of you tells you to hold off, to wait until a time when you’re both less exhausted. Before you can second-guess yourself though, you speak.

“Copia, there’s something else. About Sister Imperator.”

“What’s that then?”

You hesitate, wondering if it’s wise to divulge all the secrets she shared with you. You know it’s a matter of when, not if, she will make you pay. When you look into his anxious gaze, your heart clenches. He deserves the truth. Damn the consequences.

“She’s…your mother, my love. I’m so sorry.”

He goes quiet, looking down to where your fingers are entwined with his. It takes a minute before he speaks again.

“I think part of me always knew,” he murmurs, “She’s always been there, every step of the way. I just don’t understand why it had to be kept from me. Why she couldn’t…why she couldn’t love me outright. Like a mother should, huh?”

“I don’t know,” you say, “It’s…it’s clear she cares about you deeply but I can’t speak to her motivations. She’s a complex woman.”

He snorts softly, a small smile on his face.

“That’s putting it lightly. Well that’s a conversation for another time, my brain can’t process anymore bullshit right now. Eh, what a night. Didn’t think when I was listening to you puke that this is where things would end up.”

Your stomach does another somersault.

“Ugh don’t remind me. But Copia,” you reach up to cup his cheek and he leans into your touch, “Thank you. And I love you. For everything you are and everything you’ve done. Eternally.”

There’s no mistaking the glisten of tears in his eyes this time as he leans in to softly kiss you. When he gently pulls away he rests his forehead against yours.

“We’re taking tomorrow off,” Copia murmurs, “And we’re getting out of the abbey. I’ll text Imperator in the morning to tell her, and if she has a problem I’ll just say that if she doesn’t fuck off I won’t, em—’deceive people with signs and wonders, or sit in the temple of God and claim to be God himself’, eh?”

The laugh that comes out of you is hoarse and tired but genuine.

“Blackmail feels very Antichrist-y of you, my love.”

“See, I’m already great at this. Fear the trembler of nations,” Copia growls, dragging you down onto the bed on top of him. Laughing, you prop your chin up on his sternum.

“Kingdoms to fall one by one?”

He nods, smoothing your hair back.

“Exactly, amore. But first eh, let’s get some sleep.”

“Anything you say, Your Eminence.”

“Oh no, dolcezza mia. Not mine. All yours.”

You yawn and curl into his side.

“Goodnight, my love.”

Copia leans over and turns off the lamp, sighing heavily.

“Buonanotte, amore.”

You dream of hellfire.

You sleep more soundly than you have in a long, long time.

[crienneoftarth]

Wildest Dreams pt. III

Larissa Weems x inexperienced!fem reader

notes: pls don’t ask why it took so much less time to write this chapter… im sure you can guess. once again, ive never written smut so… im doing my best. also i am not here for realism, but for fun. so if shit does not make sense, that’s not on me tbh lmao

warnings: THIS ONE IS ACTUALLY SMUTTY. 18+ only! mommy kink, oral (cunnilingus), strap-on, reader is SO subby (a bit of self insert mayhaps)

🖤 part I, II, and ao3 🖤

As you straddle her thighs, you suddenly become very aware of how wet you already are for her. You wanted her so badly and now she would definitely be able to tell. It was impossible to hide, especially after she began to kiss you again and you couldn’t help but buck your hips, aching for a moment of contact. The older woman chuckles at your eagerness in between kisses.

Her voice lowers into almost a grow and she grabs your hips tightly, “I can feel how bad you want me, my thigh is soaked from your grinding…”

Just her saying that made it even worse. In that tone, her accent, it was too much. You try to hide in her neck out of embarrassment. “I-I’m sorry, Larissa…” You were basically out of breathe at this point but you tried to hold yourself still.

You feel her long fingers and nails snake their way into your hair before she whispers, “Don’t be sorry, pet. Keep going and don’t stop until I say so, understood?”

Whimpering softly as you nod, her fingers now tugging at your hair and her lips trailing kisses down your neck. “No… I need to hear you say it… Use your words for me, darling.”

“I understand, Larissa.” You manage to say, as you feel her other hand coming up your thigh and your hips begin to grind against her, once again.

The blonde can’t help but moan at the sound of her name, “Mmmm… I do love hearing my name coming out of your pretty mouth, but I would much prefer mommy… Can you do that for me?”

“Y-yes, mommy. I’ll do anything you ask!” Your hips begin to move faster, needlessly begging for more contact. Larissa’s lips are still on your neck, slowly leaving red lipstick and purple marks on your skin. The blonde hums into the crook of your neck as her fingers reach your lace panties, “Such a good girl, I suppose it’s time for me to reward you for being so obedient.” Suddenly her fingers pull your panties to the side before plunging one finger into your core. You cry out as she fills you and begins to thrust her palm against your swollen clit.

Larissa hasn’t stopped nipping at your neck even as she’s fucking you, “Will you take another finger for me, sweetling?”

“Yes, mommy-! Please…” You were already so close to cumming but you waited for permission. Larissa eagerly pushed another finger inside, moaning at the feeling of your slick folds taking her so easily.

“‘Rissa… M-mommy, I’m so close already…!” You stumble on your words, completely out of breath as your hips vigorously move against her hand.

“Oh, is that so, darling? Well I’m not sure I want you to cum quite yet. I have other plans for you.” She snickers as she pulls her fingers out of your aching core. You let out a whimper as her nails graze over your clit, your eyes are practically full of needy tears as you realize that she’s stopped.

“Don’t worry, pet. If you keep being good, I’ll finish you off.” You watch as she slowly brings her fingers that were just inside of you to her faded red lips. Your eyes meet as she sticks out her tongue, licking your juices from them, before pulling them into her mouth and letting out a deep moan. After a moment, she pulls them out with a popping sound.

“Fuck, you taste divine. I wouldn’t expect any less from such a beautiful woman.” She leans forward and pulls you into a deep kiss. Her tongue pushes its way into your mouth, the faint taste of you on her tongue causes you to moan. You pull away from her lips and take her hand, pushing the same two fingers in your mouth. The blonde smiles and closes her eyes as your tongue dances around her long fingers. After a moment, she pulls them back out and gently kisses you.

Your pupils fully dilated with lust and yearning, you ask what she would like for you to do.

Larissa giggles softly, “So eager to please, hmm? So adorable. Here… I want you to do something for me now, alright?”

You nod obediently. Your legs were weak and shaky but you managed to get up off of her lap and sit on the soft mattress next to her. She grins and stands up in front of you. Turning around, she loops her fingers around both straps of her dress. She glances back to see you staring with your mouth practically on the floor. You blush as she laughs at you, before facing away again and slowly pulling her dress down her delicate curves.

The pale blue dress falls to the floor and you realize that the older woman wasn’t wearing anything underneath the entire time. You blush thinking about how close you were to her and you were none the wiser.

You studied each of her silver curls that laid gently over her shoulders and back before tracing the rest of her pale curves. You could stare at her forever and memorize every freckle, wrinkle and line. The tall woman turns around in her heels and gives you another moment to take in your new view of her body. She giggles as you inhale sharply at the sight of her. “Do me a favor, sweetheart? There’s a… Treat for you in the bottom drawer of the nightstand there.”

You swallow roughly before leaning over the bed, reaching the bottom drawer she mentioned. Your mind went through the million things that could await you as you slowly opened it, revealing a blue silicone dildo that was already attached to a harness. Your eyes widened and you looked over at Larissa, who had a devilish smile on her face. “Bring it here, won’t you, my darling?”

Your face was hot as you walked over to her, dildo in hand. “Thank you, sweetling. Now, go ahead get those clothes off for me, alright? I’ll help you into this.”

Your eyes grow big while she takes the toy in her hand, slowly stepping out of your skirt and removing the blouse you were wearing. She examines you closely as you strip before leaning over to help you into the harness. You step into it carefully and she pulls it up over your legs, adjusting the straps tightly.

“I-I’ve never worn one of these… I’m not sure I know what to do…” You say nervously as she stands back up in front of you. You try not to look at the toy protruding from your pelvis, embarrassed at how you look to her.

She gently takes your face in one hand, “I know you’ll be perfect. And if you feel uncomfortable or want to stop, please, don’t hesitate to tell me. Okay, sweetheart?”

You kiss her hand and nod, “I’ll be okay, I’m just nervous.”

“I’ll teach you, you’ll be a pro in no time, I promise.” She giggles and pulls you into a kiss. After a few kisses, she steps back and lays back onto the bed. You blush at the sight of her spreading her thighs for you. You still couldn’t believe you had even gotten into this situation at all, let alone with such a goddess of a woman. You were shy but tried to be as confident as you possibly could, to please her. Climbing onto the bed, she smiled at you as you got in a comfortable position between her legs.

“I want your tongue in me first… Will you do that?”

“Of course, mommy. Anything for you…” You had been waiting all night to taste her and now she was spread just for you. You could see that she was dripping onto the sheets, just the sight of her like this was enough to send you over the edge. Laying on your stomach in front of her, you kiss down her thighs and leave little nibbles as you approach closer to her center. She was already moaning and whimpering at the feeling of your teeth against her soft skin.

Her fingers tangled themselves in your hair as you started to gently lap up her wet folds. After a moment of teasing her clit, she pulls your head closer. “Y-your tongue… Feels so good, darling. I want to feel it inside me. No more teasing.” She tells you sternly, trying not to beg but you could tell she was on the verge of whimpering for you. As much as you wanted to teaser her a little longer, you did as you were told and your tongue made its way into her warm center. Her thighs quickly tightened around your head as your tongue explored her, you pushed them back apart without thinking of the possible consequences. All she could do was moan at your sudden change in confidence, “That’s a good girl… You feel so fucking good.”

Her hips began to buck against the motions of your tongue and the vibrations of your own moans against her. She pulls up your head, both of you out of breath and her wetness glistening on your chin, “Put that cock to good use for me now, okay? I know you’ll be perfect for mommy.”

You climb up to her lips to kiss her and she licks the juices from your face, before pulling you into a kiss. One of your hands makes its way to her hardened nipple, gently squeezing as you begin to kiss down her chin and neck. You take the other nipple into your mouth as you continue to gently pinch the other between your fingers.

“Baby… Fuck… I want you inside of me so bad…” She lets out in between pornographic moans.

Your tongue flicks her nipple before biting down and she cries out as your teeth graze the sensitive skin. “Fuck me, right now…” she orders, roughly pulling the toy to her cunt. “Put your fucking cock in me now!”

You waste no time and do as you're told, pushing the toy inside of her slowly at first. The moan she lets out once you’re fully inside of her makes your body shiver. You take a moment to get used to the motions, watching her every reaction to your movements, wishing you were actually inside of her and feeling her walls contract around you. You can’t take your eyes off of each other. Even as she squirms underneath you, her eyes stay locked onto yours, glossed over with lust.

She wanted every inch of the toy you were pushing into her eager cunt. “More, darling… I can take it, you can be a little rough with me…” She says breathlessly, chuckling softly, her breasts moving to the rhythm of your thrusts. You want her to cum so badly, you want to please her, so you move your hips harder and faster against her. The sound of your bodies hitting each other gets louder as you continue to push deeper inside her.

“Oh my god… I knew you would be so good at this. Fuck, you feel so good inside me.”

You watch as her beautiful blue eyes roll back into her head and her back arches as you move into a slower rhythm, leaning over and burying your face into her neck. She drags her fingernails down your back and you cry out. “Don’t whine. I didn’t tell you to slow down, pet. You don’t get to stop until I say so.” She sternly growls into your ear. You quickly return to speed, you could never refuse what she asks of you.

“Good. Fucking. Girl. You don’t get to stop until I cum all over your cock, understand?”

“Y-yes, mommy… I won’t stop, I promise…” You manage to say and continue pounding into her. The feeling of the harness pushing against your own clit made it difficult to not orgasm yourself, but you knew you would be punished if you let yourself cum before her. But maybe you wanted to be punished by her… Maybe you wanted her to throw you over her knee and spank you until tears spilled down your cheeks and your ass was completely red. Maybe you wanted her to tie you to the bed and made you watch her fuck herself without letting you touch her. The thought of her disciplining you and absolutely ruining you causes your entire body to quiver.

Then you hear her. She screams out your name as she’s on the verge of orgasming. You never wanted anyone else to say your name ever again, it belonged to her.

You belonged to her.

And you both knew it.

You lean back upright so you can witness her beautiful face as she cums for you. Your hands steady her hips as you keep thrusting as deep as you can into her dripping cunt. Her hands grip the sheets on either side of her as she cries out, screaming endless profanities. You were honestly impressed with yourself that you could make her feel this way with your inexperience. But you had no time to get cocky before you realized her back had arched off of the bed as she reached climax… At last, it had happened so fast and yet it felt like hours.

The cock was pushed out by her contracting walls, causing her to let out a whine when it came out of her. You looked down and saw the soaking mess you made of her and you licked your lips with delight and desire.

She smiles at you and between heavy breaths she says, “I appreciate your enthusiasm, sweetheart, but I do believe it’s time for me to thank you properly.”

⋆ ✩₊˚ ʚ♡ɞ ˚₊✩⋆

tag list (let me know if you’d like to be added!)-

@aemilia19

[yunirgo]

steve harrington x fem!reader ; fluff/comfort(?)

tw: mentions of food, reader doesn’t want to eat and is struggling a bit with self image, bad writing (sorry), pretty self indulgent

“you have to eat something, honey,” he insists.

“i’m not hungry steve,” you insist back.

steve noticed how you’ve been reluctant to eat lately. at first it was you turning down snacks he’d offer, then you started eating a meal a day.

today though, you haven’t had anything to eat and it was already nighttime. to say he was worried was definitely an understatement.

“babe, you haven’t eaten anything all day! that’s not good for you, you know that,” you try to not roll your eyes, but aren’t very successful. “look, if you at least eat a toast i’ll leave you alone, i promise.”

“steve, i’m not hungry. i’m not not eating because i don’t want to, i’m just not hungry,” tears well up in your eyes. you weren’t lying, not entirely anyway.

you’d looked in the mirror the other day and weren’t that pleased with your body, which made your appetite vanish. you’d tried to eat something for your own good, but the thought of food made you feel uneasy, guilty even. and the fact that you’d been having a lot of snacks and food the past week didn’t make it any easier. it was like your own body was punishing you for eating so much to the point of forbidding you to have some food.

a heavy sigh escapes his lips, followed by his hand pushing his hair back. steve leans over the kitchen counter, his arms crossed in front of his chest. “i’m not letting you go to sleep without eating something first.”

“stevie-“

“y/n, please. just a toast, okay? so i can feel at peace knowing you have something in your system. what do you say?” and he has the audacity of using those stupid puppy eyes to convince you. what an asshole.

a good thirty seconds pass when you finally cave in. “i hate you,” and that smile, god, it makes you want to eat all of the toasts in the whole fucking galaxy if it means seeing him grin like that for the rest of your life.

“and i love you. i’ll even put on lots of that butter you like, baby. just sit there and let me be your cook for the night, yeah?” he kisses your head and starts working on your little meal. you watch him move around the kitchen, his arm flexing when he reaches up to the cabinet for a plate, his tongue sticking out when he spreads the butter on the toast; it makes you feel loved and cared for. “here you go. one golden, buttery toast for the prettiest girl in the whole world,” the boy smiles, pearly whites in full display for you.

“i’m still mad at you,” it was a lie, both of you are fully aware of it.

“i can handle that. now eat,” after staring at it, you finally take a bite of the toasted bread in front of you. the taste of melted butter makes you feel better instantly. you practically inhale the toast without noticing. it definitely wakes up your appetite. “good job, baby.”

“oh god, im so hungry now,” you say with a whine.

“well, you’re in luck because your favorite chef in the whole world will be very happy to feed you,” and he does. he prepares something small. not much to not scare you, but enough to feed you properly. you eat his food with content hums here and there and he watches you with satisfaction. “you know, you shouldn’t feel guilty about wanting to eat. it’s your body trying to keep you alive,” he comments once you’ve finished your food, pushing a hair strand behind your ear.

“i know… i just- i feel gross about it sometimes, having to eat. i know i shouldn’t feel guilty, but i can’t help it,” steve, the sweetheart he is, pulls you to his chest and leaves a kiss at the top of your head.

“i know, honey. i’m sorry,” he starts swaying side to side, your ear right by his heart. his heartbeat calms yours. “it makes me really sad to see you struggle with that, but i will always be here to remind you that it’s completely normal and okay to feel hungry and eat. maybe eating together can help. i love watching you eat” you look up at him; he looks down at you, both melting at the love in each others’ gaze.

“you’re really weird, but i really love you, you know?”

“mhmm, i love you more”.

a/n: i get a lot of these little episodes and my best friend is the one who reminds me it’s just my body doing its job and that i shouldn’t feel guilty for being hungry or eating. i know it’s not easy dealing with it, but if you go through this too and ever need someone to talk to, i’m here for you<3 remember you’re perfect just the way you are!

[j0elmill3r]

Man, I Hate Golf.

Pairing - Joel Miller x Daughter!reader

Summary - Joel has a newfound hate for golf after Abby leaves him traumatized.

Warnings - Major character death, violence, sad Joel, diverges from canon, spoilers for the last of us part 2

Word Count - 1.4k

A/N - I am...so sorry for this, this could be sadder than my previous fics.

Joel Miller Masterlist

You knew this was too good to be true, things had been going too smoothly since you and your dad had joined your uncle Tommy - Joel having stopped talking to Ellie after their argument. You'd saved a girl younger than you - Abby, her name was - from a horde of infected. You were freezing, the blizzard that had swept through Jackson drastically lowering your body heat, your dad had given you his jacket to try and keep you warm - Even though you were now in your late twenties, Joel was still hellbent on looking after you as though you were still a small child.

You should have trusted your gut instinct, which had told you to take all of Abby's group out. They had acted as though they knew your father and uncle, which then resulted in your leg being shot, and Joel and Tommy both being knocked out.

"Y/N Miller," Abby seethed, crouching down in front of you as she held her gun. You struggled in the grasp of the two men holding you against the window, but you wouldn't have been able to move very much, the makeshift tourniquet tied around the gunshot wound on your leg seriously restricted your movement. You couldn't quite make out the girls face, the place was dark and grim, illuminated by the white glow of the snow outside.

"Do I know you?" You asked her through heaving breaths, your chest rising and falling as you gritted your teeth in pain. She shook her head, you could see tears in her eyes as you looked over her face - Shit. You did know her. Abby Anderson.

Ellie, the hospital, your dad killing the doctors before they could kill Ellie. They were fireflies.

You remembered now. You let out a sigh as you shook your head, giving her a hard glare as your dad and uncle Tommy started to wake up. "Why don't you just give me whatever speech you've been planning and get it over with?" You said, your gaze hardening on the girl in front of you. You let out a scream of pain as they tightened the tourniquet around your leg, the two men beside you letting go of your arms as they fell limply to your sides. The two men moved over to where Joel and Tommy were slowly waking up, they held them back, rendering them unable to move in their tight grip.

You watched in slight fear as she raised a golf club, but you stayed composed, even if you couldn't see how panicked your dad now was. Joel feared for not only his and his brother's lives, but now yours - He knew the girls cause, and you didn't have anything to do with it, it was him that she wanted, not you.

"You stupid bitch," Abby spat at you, pointing the golf club she held tight in her hands at your head. "You don't get to rush this." She told you harshly, giving you no time to react before she swung the golf club at your head, a sickening crack echoing throughout the room as you crumpled to the floor with a pained groan. You couldn't feel your legs any more, and everything felt all muffled, both your sight and hearing.

"No!" Joel cried out, trying to get out of the man who held him's grasp. No. This wasn't happening. You didn't hear your dad and uncle Tommy screaming out for you to keep your eyes open, you were tired. "I'll fucking kill you!" Joel yelled at the women who stood over your limp self, the only showing that you were still alive being your shallow breathing, and your eyes lazily looking up to meet his. Joel could tell that you were tired, watching as your eyes lethargically rolled around, a lazy smile on your face as you met your dad's eyes.

Why was he crying?

You were no longer aware of your situation, your brain slowly shutting down due to the strong blow that had been delivered to your skull.

"Pin him down," Abby ordered, watching as they moved Joel to be laying on his front, kneeling on his neck to make him watch. He felt tears rising as he realised you weren't getting out of this, your blood splattered across the window where you were once kneeling. "I wanna make him watch." She spat, looking down at Joel in spite before she turned back to you, gripping the golf club in her hands tightly.

"No, Y/N, baby, please get up," Joel pleaded with you, he knew that you still had to be in there, despite the blood seeping out from the crack in your skull. "Y/N fucking get up." He cried, now begging you to get up. "Please stop, don't do this, it's not her you want." Joel was no longer begging you, but begging Abby, who held your fate in her hands in the form of a golf club.

Joel's begging fell on deaf ears, as he watched Abby swing her golf club down on your head.

Cracking your skull open with a sickening crunch, which echoed throughout the room - feeling deafening towards your father, it was all he heard, over, and over, and over again.

"No!" He cried, not realising that Tommy had yelled out at the same time at the death of his niece. Joel struggled in the grasps of the men holding him down, watching as your blood dripped from the club "I'm gonna fucking kill you," Joel threatened throughout his sobs, ignoring the man that came towards him, a gun pointed at his head. He just stared at you - laying there, bloodied and lifeless - As if trying to will you to wake up. Everything became muffled to Joel as he continued sobbing, mourning the death of his youngest daughter. He gave one last look towards the woman who had so brutally ended your life, before he was kicked in the face, everything turning to black once more.

He woke up to shaking, his eyes opening to make out the blurry face of his brother, who's face was marked with tear stains after witnessing your traumatizing death.

"Joel," Tommy watched as his older brother finally came around, once more looking over at you. Tommy had moved you away from the pool of your own blood, trying to trick Joel into thinking it wasn't as bad as it looked, going as far to manoeuvre your head to hide the hole in your skull. "Come on, we should go." He advised, helping his brother stand as he limped over to you. Joel held your hand gently, fearing that if he held you too tightly then you would turn to dust - Even though no matter how gently he held your hand, your blood still coated his. Gently, Joel picked your lifeless self up, the way he did when you were a young child at the start of the outbreak.

"I wanna take her back, bury her in Jackson," Joel spoke quietly as he studied your face, stained with blood. Tommy nodded in understanding, he knew Joel had taken Sarah's death badly, but now you were gone too, so he was unsure of how Joel would handle your death. He watched as Joel let out an angry heave. "And them I am gonna kill, every single one of those girls friends, and save her for last."

Tommy couldn't say he had ever been particularly scared of his older brother, but this, this was Joel at his most unhinged. He knew that Joel wouldn't stop until he avenged your death, and that he wouldn't take any prisoners in his quest to avenge you - He would also, show no hesitation in his violence in dealing with them. If they wanted to make your death a brutal one, he could double it.

And make sure it was painful.

Taglist - want to join? fill out this form!

@mrvlxgrl @white-wolf-buckaroo @sunf1owerrq @change-the-world-someday @sleepylunarwolf @mand1ora @kobiiblog @rrickgrrimes8 @wxnderingthoughts​

[recklessramos]

Blissful

Will Ramos x plus size fem reader

18+!!

So the other day I had a thought about Will that just wouldn’t shift from my mind so I decided to take it to my blessed notes app, which made the thought turn into a writing idea. Suddenly I have almost 10,000 words and if I don’t post this I think I’ll go crazy. I’ve put my whole pussy into this (lmao) and it’s ma cursed baby however this is the first smut I’ve written since 2021 so be kind:))))

Warnings-

9,692 words of absolutely feral smut I am disgraceful!!, mentions of negative body image and reader being on a healing journey, sickening fluff, mentions usage of weed, PIV sex, unprotected sex (all together now ‘wrap it before you tap it!’) oral (male and female rec), Will is PACKING, soft dom(?) Will, use of ‘slut’, lots of dirty talk, flirting, hair pulling, cum play, clit spanking, light choking, spanking, spit, edging (fem rec), overstimulation, pet names, use of ‘y/n’ I think that’s everything but let me know if I’ve forgot anything!

This is completely self fulfilling lmao😭😭 Also the whole writing process of this felt so blissful(ly frustrating😭😭) so ofc I had to call it blissful. Also because it’s Will duh.

Even though this was written with a curvy reader in mind, this is for everyone!!! We all deserve love and appreciation (and earth shattering pleasure)!!!!

Also please excuse the low quality collage I made, I tried my best💀 Anyway I’m going straight to hell and I’m going there happy and horny🤍

GIF credits: julien-mayfair and all the pics in the collage are from Pinterest so dm me for removal!

————————————————————————

You’d been struggling with your body image recently and even though you persevered with your affirmations, vigorous self-care and weekly therapy the thoughts still clouded your mind throughout the day. Will was aware of the fact you were on a healing journey and you couldn’t ask for more from him.

He was there with you on the easier days when you flaunt all your curves and see no issue on having your stretch marks peeking through your crop tops, or how your back rolls are hugged by your shirt. He loved seeing how your outfit hugged your curves, how you smile at yourself while repeating your affirmations in the mirror. He would even repeat them back to you, ‘you are so worthy, so loveable and so fucking beautiful’ he’ll say to you as his hands sneak from your waist to cup your stomach with soft fingers and his adoring grin that never failed to make your stomach flutter.

On the days like today when the thought of standing in front of a mirror causes your stomach to spin with anxiety, eyes brimming with tears, he’d wrap his arms around you so you could hide your face in his chest as he spoke your affirmations to you. It may take five or ten minutes of staying with your back to the mirror and your face in his chest before you can turn to face your reflection but when you do the bright, warm smile Will showcases is enough to make your chest swell in love and appreciation.

He whispers gentle words of unconditional love in your ear as your eyes scan over your body, you breathe through the discomfort and focus on staying calm and centred. At first the affirmations you repeat feel ridiculous, but after five minutes your shoulders have released their tension and you're beginning to ease into your body.

There’s gentle music playing in the background of your conversation with Will, which only consists of sweet words and soft laughter as he tickles over the sides of your torso. You move from standing in front of the mirror to sitting on the floor, crossed legged with Will behind you. His legs are out on either side of you giving you easy access to lean back into his body, his clothed chest pressing into your back. You can sit comfortably like this for hours, just you and him and the reflection of you you're learning to become acquaintances with. Luckily for you this was both your day off from work, so it can be spent with just you two in your home, smoking weed, cooking your favourite meals while singing along to some of your favourite songs together.

With a full belly and a blissfully cloudy mind from the joint you shared after the time spent in front of your mirror, you end up on the couch cuddled under a blanket watching one of Will’s favourite movies. Your bodies are intertwined, your mind at ease from any negativity. When you’re together like this, nothing else matters.

After a couple hours you start to fidget through boredom, tapping your foot to the sound of nothing and letting out exaggerated sighs every now and again. It’s not that the movie that Will chose for you to watch was boring, it was just that you couldn’t stop thinking about all the other things you could be doing together. You saw yourself on your knees, arms pulled back and pinned to your back by Will, face pushed into the sofa while Will rammed into you at a torturously slow and hard pace. You picture how your ass will slap into the ending dip of his v lines, how deep the tip of his cock will land in your throbbing pussy.

‘What- why can’t you keep still?’ you freeze in reaction to Will’s question, not even realising you’d been shifting your hips around in an unknowing effort for some relief from the ache on your clit. ‘Uh- I’m not even moving!’ you try to argue back but he drops his eyebrows, slightly squinting his eyes suspiciously. ‘I’m just trying to get comfy.’ You try in hopes that he doesn’t figure out that the movie he’d chose just wasn’t keeping you distracted from the lustful thoughts that burned into your mind, but to no avail as a smirk pulled at his lips. Will could read you like an open book, there was no hiding when you were sad or feeling insecure or so horny you were about to start grinding the couch cushions.

‘Hmm is that true?’ his tone dropped, he knew you were lying and that you were really aching for him to touch you, but it’s Will- of course he’s not going to give you what you want right away. You only replied by slightly nodding, you could either give in and tell him what you want, or you could be the stubborn brat you often chose to be in these situations just to find out what could happen on the other end of things; the grass is greener on the other side after all.

Right?

‘Yeah, we might have to think about getting some new cushions for the couch. These ones are awfully uncomfortable.’ you mutter back, jutting your hips around at the end of your sentence just to back up your case. Also so you can try and ease the throbbing that was making your stomach ache and pussy clench around nothing. You needed to be filled up by his cock right now.

For a long moment you both stare at each other, waiting for the other to say something. The air was becoming heavy, your body was curving into him as a reaction to the thought of having his cock in you. He noticed this change in your body, chuckling slightly and shaking his head.

‘We could always go to bed if it’s that much of an issue that you can’t focus on the movie.’ He nodded his head towards the stairs, you manage to hide the raise in your eyebrows as the idea makes you press your thighs together.

‘It’s only eight.’ You glance down at his lips as you continue your exploration on how far you can take it till you give in. Will could never give in, he’d happily tease you for the rest of the night if you choose to go along with it, he had before and he’d do it again, so it all came down to how long you could hold out for.

‘I can think of a few things that’ll keep us busy for the next couple hours.’ His fingers trace your jawline ever so slightly, your lips parted and he took the opportunity to slip the tip of his thumb between them. By automatic reaction, you sucked it gently as your tongue skimmed against the pad of his thumb and as quick as it was there, it was gone with a pop of your lips. Any chance of you holding out was thrown right out the window when his lips part in a shit eating grin and you take in a hurried breath as you act on pure impulse and slam your lips against his, catching him off guard for a mere second before he gains composure again. His lips move against yours, matching your rhythm and your tongues are quickly passing over one another.

He grabs your hips and pulls you onto his lap so you’re straddling him, your lips never disconnecting. You don’t waste a moment as you begin to grind against his crotch furiously, letting your soft whimpers get lost in the kiss that had your chest burning and your panties soaked.

With one of your hands on the side of his head and the other threaded into his curls, your chests pushed together so he could feel your hardening nipples through the thin layers that separate you from him, you thought you couldn’t be closer to him. You were proven wrong when he grips your body closer to his, easily flipping you over so you were laid on the couch with him above you. The kiss broke for a moment so you could both take a breath, and you took the opportunity to wrap your legs around his hips, his crotch meeting your centre as his lips meet yours again.

Your hands gripped his shirt, pulling at it desperate to lose the fabric from his body. He noticed immediately and leant back onto his knees, pulling his shirt from his tatted body. He tries to lean back down but you place a hand on his chest to stop him, his eyebrows twitch in confusion. You take your time as you scan your eyes from his neck, down his chest and toned torso, his deep v lines (oh my god don’t get me started on the v lines) to where his waistband sits lowly. You try to squeeze your legs shut because of how his Godly body makes your pussy ache desperately for attention, only pulling him closer to you in the process and finding no relief. When you meet his eyes again, they’re darkened, so much so that his dilated pupils blend with his usually brown eyes and that same shit eating grin is plastered on his face.

Although Will could be shy at times that didn’t change the fact he was aware of how hot he was, how the sharpness of his jaw line, the movement of his Adams apple when he swallows, the toned exterior of his abs all make you weak in the knees and immediately desperate to feel every inch of him deep in your guts.

One of his hands move from your hips to cup your jaw, your gaze faltering under your eyelashes. Your breaths both pick up when your soft, pleading gaze meets his dark, lustful one. His thumb softly pets over your bottom lip, you wait impatiently for it to pass into your warm mouth. When he doesn’t give you what he knows you want, you wrap your lips of the pad of it and begin to suck down onto his thumb wishing it was his cock. Your eyes plead and he knows exactly what for.

His mouth is agape and his hair is slightly dishevelled from your tugs at it, all you can think about is the tip of his cock hitting the back of your throat, his hands in your hair as he fucks your mouth mercilessly. ‘Just like that angel, suck it like you would my cock.’ you let out a whimper from his dirty words, words that make you lift your hips up to him in hopes he’ll listen and give you what you want. When instead he chuckles, you begin to whimper again but he cuts you off.

‘As pretty as those noises are, they aren’t gonna get you what you want.’ your eyes look up at him with pleading and desperation, your hips trying to shift closer to his. Just as you graze his crotch with your clothed centre, he pulls his thumb from your mouth and pushes your hips down to meet the couch. ‘Look at how desperate you are, I bet your panties are soaked aren’t they?’

‘Will-’ you begin but are cut off by your own gasp as he places the ball of his palm over your clit, pushing with barely any pressure but it’s enough to earn an ‘oh my’ from you. ‘I bet you could cum in seconds just like this, when I'm barely even touching you.’ he mumbles lowly, eyes locked between your legs as you begin to grind your hips into his touch.

Soft moans tumble from your lips, your head rocks back making your chest pop up slightly, welcoming Will in when he twists your nipples between his fingers over your shirt.

‘How about we see if you really are that desperate? Hmm?’ his tone is slightly cruel and completely unhinged, but you’re so focused on how you’re finally getting some relief after what feels like hours of yearning that you don’t even acknowledge his words.

His hand begins to grind against you in circles and your hips match his rhythm in all directions against his palm. Up, down, side to side, in circles and random jolts. You don’t care how desperate it is, the fact Will is letting you get off this soon is enough of a shock for you to grab it before it may be taken from you. You flick your eyes open to see Will readjusting his crotch just as your orgasm begins to threaten to take over. ‘Fuck, you don’t know what you’re doing to me, baby.’ His nearly breathless words are enough to knock you over the edge, but just as your eyes become cloudy and your clit is throbbing so hard it feels like your pussy is going to explode his touch is lost and you literally cry out in frustration.

‘Fuck Will! Why’d you-’

‘Shhhh, don’t worry angel imma give you what you want you’ve just gotta wait a minute, okay?’ his tone is soothing and genuine, but you’re raging from the lost orgasm and your pussy is throbbing harder than ever.

‘No Will it’s never just a minute, it’s hours and I'm fucking desperate. Please I need to cum so bad.’ you’re begging for anything and Will feels the tension in your body, so he leans down to kiss you in an effort to calm you down. At first, you’re stiff and pulsing with anger, but you can’t stay too angry at him when his lips are so soft against your mouth, and his warm tongue gets you thinking about its wetness soaking your clit in languid strokes. Your body softness and you ease into the kiss before pulling back to speak.

‘Please, Will, I need it so bad.’ you beg again, hoping your soft tone and puppy eyes will get you what you want.

‘I know and I'm gonna give you what you want, just not yet okay? When have I ever left you hanging?’ at first you pout at his words, but you know he’s right. Even on nights where he’s edged you for what feels like hours, he always gives you back every orgasm he denies and sometimes more if you ask him to.

He begins to kiss down your neck, his hands tracing the hem of your shirt. His lips are soft and gentle, his tongue kitten licking over the warm skin he litters with soft pecks. His hands find their way under your shirt passing over your tummy and to the curve of your breast.

‘Can I take this off?’ he questions while tugging the fabric of your shirt, you nod in response and lean up to help him and the cool air hits your chest immediately making your nipples become harder than they already were. You return to your prior positions, his kisses finding their way down your collar bones to your chest. His eyes are closed as he savours the feeling of your soft flesh against his lips which have begun to follow over the top of your breasts.

He begins to suck on your breast and create light hickies on the skin, you feel his hand move from your hip up to your other breast and his fingers begin to twist and pull your nipple. He begins gently tugging on the tight bud causing you to gasp from the sensation. Your nipples are sensitive from the cold air and his tugs become sharper, creating goosebumps over your skin. One of your hands thread into his hair to keep it from falling into his face and the other rests on his shoulder, tracing small circles over his tattoos.

Suddenly his mouth is on your nipple, sucking and flicking his warm tongue over the cold, tight bud and your back curves, making him suck harder. Your other nipple is beginning to burn blissfully from the tugs and pinches that never end, your thighs squeeze around his waist. He hums on your nipple, releasing it with a pop but not giving you a moment to breath when he moves over to your other nipple. His fingers are now tugging at the wet, puffy nipple that’s covered in his spit, he mimics the same pinching, tugging and swiping that once accompanied the nipple that his soft tongue is working on to ease its soreness.

His name falls angelically from your lips, you begin to think you could cum just from this. Almost as if he knew your thoughts, all of his touch retreats and you whimper as the cold air hits your bare skin. His lips continue down your stomach, kissing over your stretch marks with so much love and care. He stops when he reaches your waistband, and you cut him off as he begins to speak.

‘Yes Will,’ he smirks at your impatience, knowing just how desperate you are for his mouth to devour the pool that's been created between your legs. You lift your hips as his warm hands pull off your shorts, leaving your panties on.

You feel like crying through relief when instead of teasing you anymore, he finds his place lying on his front with his head between your legs and arms wrapped around your thighs.

He kisses up the inside of your thighs, getting further away from where you need him most. One of your hands rests on the back of his head, your other squeezes one of your breasts. Will doesn’t notice this until you tug on your nipple, causing you to gasp and his eyes shoot open.

‘There you go baby; you keep making yourself feel good, okay?’ his dark eyes burn into you, making your cheeks flush but you nod in response and continue to play with your swollen bud. ‘Fuck you’re so hot, y/n.’ now it’s his turn to blush just from the sight of your eyes rolling to the back of your head from an especially hard tug on your puffy nipple.

His fingers hook under your panties to pull them to the side and the anticipation is killing you as, finally, he licks a small stripe along each of your folds- still avoiding your swollen clit that is burning for attention.

As you open your mouth to begin to beg for him to give you what you want, a heavy heave leaves your chest as he sucks your clit into his mouth. Your back curves, head digging into the couch. Both of your hands hold his head in place as his mouth begins to work on the swollen, pulsing bud in small, soft sucks and kitten licks barely on the tip of it. Moans escape your mouth endlessly, his eyes open to see yours already on him.

Will is very aware of the fact that eye contact while he eats you out drives you insane, and he uses this to his own advantage. Just a slight darkening to his eyes can push you right over the edge and with how dark his eyes already are you don’t see how they could get darker. You close your eyes, not wanting the feeling to end just yet.

He begins to move his head to meet the movement from his tongue that have become longer and harder, this sends a spark down your legs making them jolt shut on his head. He pry's your legs open and releases your clit from his mouth so he can speak with his face still stuffed between your legs.

‘Wanna hear your beautiful moans, angel.’ his words are muffled but you try your best to keep your legs open as he begins to flatten his tongue against your clit, adding a new sensation into the mix.

You moan his name over and over again with a mix of curses and ‘oh mys’, his arms now having to hold your legs open because you couldn’t stop your body as your legs begin to kick out and attempt to close on his head.

His tongue slips down between your folds to meet your pussy with a soft stroke before slipping it into your hole, collecting your sopping wetness onto his tongue and carrying it up onto your clit.

‘Fuck baby, you’re so wet for me.’ his mouth doesn’t leave your skin, so his words vibrate against your clit, you gasp out at the feeling and your orgasm begins to build in your stomach.

‘Fuck, Will I’m so close. Please don’t stop’ your words get lost through the never-ending chant of his name and the gasps you can’t hold back when he slips his tongue into your pussy again and begins to fuck you with his tongue.

His thumb finds its place on your clit in small, tight circles as his tongue begins to fuck you faster, curving up and swirling around in your dripping pussy. His eyes open to meet yours, looking up at you with complete focus on making you feel as good as you possibly can and he flashes you a slightly playful, completely smug wink. The coil in your stomach broke and with a scream of his name you come all over his tongue, mouth and chin, your legs shaking and thrashing as your nails dig into his hair. Your head is thrown so far back it aches your neck, your eyes screwed shut as flashes of white and an array of colours fill your mind. Your moans are strained and sound almost pained, the way his tongue slips in and out of you makes you come so hard it feels like you’ll never come back down.

But alas, your vision unblurs and your legs flop onto the couch, your hands unclutching his hair. His thumb moves from your clit and his hand slips up to stroke over your tummy lovingly. His tongue finally slips out of your pussy after pulling you down from your orgasm and it begins to ever so slightly lick your clit.

Your chest heaves up and down when he finally pulls his mouth from your pussy, kissing up your body until you’re face to face while his hands work to pull your underwear down your legs. You finally open your eyes to meet his heavy gaze, his beautiful (and rather fucking magical) lips are pulled up in a smile that makes your stomach flip again.

‘I love you so much.’ you manage to force your words out between your heavy breaths, your lips connect for a small kiss. ‘I was beginning to think you may hate me after the look you gave me when I didn’t let you come.’ he laughs slightly as you begin to kiss down his neck, you feel his chest rise sharply when you suck on his pulse point. ‘I could never hate you.’ your words mumble against his neck.

‘I know. I’m not done making it up to you yet, though.’ his words are daring, if you were smart you’d take the opportunity to get out while you still can. You’re too fucked to consider that though, especially when Will begins to palm himself through his jeans that he must’ve unbuttoned without you realising. He grins down at you from his knees when your eyebrows raise at the change in tone.

‘On your knees.’ his sharp words go straight to your core and you know you’re making a mess of the couch; you immediately find your place on the floor where his head nodded toward. The hardwood is cold against your skin, making you hiss through your teeth. Will notices this and directs you up so he can place a pillow below your knees. You appreciate his kindness, especially knowing what’s coming next.

‘Listen closely babe,’ you nod attentively and he continues ‘tap my leg twice and I’ll slow down, three times for me to stop completely. Okay?’ his hand cups your face, softly stroking your cheek.

‘Twice to slow down and three times to stop.’ you nod along with your words; he smiles down at you while tucking your hair behind your ears. ‘I’m ready.’ you eagerly flutter your eyes at him, the anticipation eating away at you.

‘You’re such a good girl, you want me to fuck your mouth that much?’ his tone is slightly teasing, but you’re not embarrassed. You love having his cock in your mouth, you love it even more when he cums on your tongue and directs you to stick it out so he can see the mess he made before you swallow every drop down. Maybe if you’re good enough he’ll give you exactly what he knows you want.

You nod in response to his question, your hands pulling at his jeans. He pushes them away while talking ‘Keep them behind your back, only patient girls get what they want.’ you huff in response which makes him shake his head and smirk to himself. ‘You never have been very patient, have you? Maybe I should teach you a lesson, make you wait all night just to have my cock in your mouth. Maybe make you wait all week to have it stuffed in your pussy. Make you so cock starved that you never get greedy again, you just appreciate anything that I give you.’ The idea terrifies you, literally. The thought of having none of him for one night, let alone a week makes you want to cry. It also ignites a fire in you that you didn’t know existed.

‘Or maybe I’ll be nice, give you what you want.’ he pulls his jeans and boxers down, letting his cock fling up and nearly hit his stomach while he kicks his clothes to the side. Your mouth immediately begins to water from the sight of it, your thighs squeezing together as tight as possible. His cock is long and thick and heavy, so thick that the sight of it already makes your jaw ache. It used to scare you, how big it is, but now you love the fact that you’re left with a sore jaw for days after he’s fucked your mouth; a constant reminder of the feeling of his length slipping down your throat.

‘Please Will.’ your eyelashes flutter as you plead, desperate to have his beautifully shaped cock slip into your mouth and down your throat. You want to feel the veins that line his length slip against your tongue with every thrust he delivers deep in your mouth. ‘Such a good girl begging for my cock in your mouth.’ his words send a rush to your core as his hand cups your jaw, tapping your bottom lip and you quickly open your mouth.

Your jaw loosens as the swollen, leaking tip of his cock slips between your lips. You both hum in satisfaction, his salty precum lathers your tongue deliciously. Slowly, torturously so, he begins to slowly fill your mouth. The heaviness of his cock weighs down on your tongue, your lips stretching to fit around the thickness of it. Your hands are balled in fists behind your back, your thighs squeezed together as your knees dig into the pillow below them.

‘Good girl,’ he speaks in a low raspy tone as a deep grunt escapes his mouth. His hips shift and tense, sharpening his gorgeous v lines even more. You’re completely mesmerised, even through blurry and teary eyes as you feel the tip of him hit the back of your throat. ‘Now I need you to open up for me, angel.’ he taps your throat and your blink a tear away as your throat opens for him, giving him complete access to do as he pleases to you.

His chest is tight as he pulls out of your mouth till just the tip is left between your lips before slowly pushing back in, only this time he slips down into your throat. His hands hold onto the back of your head to steady himself as he begins to gently fuck your mouth. You're grateful that he eases you into it, but so eager for more. His strokes are so slow and soft, your stomach flips with butterflies.

After a few strokes in your warm mouth his breathing is heavy and his hands clutch onto your head.

‘God, you look so good with my cock in your mouth.’ you hum as your cheeks blush from his sweet words about such a dirty thing. ‘Blushing with my cock in your mouth? You really are an angel, aren’t you?’ he chuckles at the irony and the obscenity of his words causes your cheeks to flush harder, you manage to stop the laugh that was about to escape his chest again and it's replaced with an animalistic moan when you take initiative and push his cock further down your throat. It tickles deep in your throat, your eyes burn and you gag painfully, but it’s enough to make him begin his sharp thrusts down your throat.

You try your best to keep your hands behind your back, but you end up with them gripped onto your thighs to keep yourself stable as his thrusts become faster. His cock is heavy and warm down your throat; the stretch burns and aches, but blissfully so.

Your name falls from his lips through a mix of grunts, curses, moans and gasps as your tongue pushes up against his shaft and your cheeks hollow. You finally take a breath when he pulls out of your mouth completely, both of your chest rising rapidly.

‘Come on baby, gonna fill you up now. You've earnt it.’ he grips your hands and pulls you to your feet, pressing a kiss on your forehead before guiding you over to the couch. He directs you to sit on your knees facing the arm of the couch before finding his way behind you.

‘You did so well for me, angel.’ his hands begin to stroke over your back, round to cup your breasts and gently upward to ease over your neck. ‘You took me so well.’ His praises earn a soft whimper from you, his hands now pinching your nipples again in the same torturous way as earlier. You clutch the arm rest in front of you, making your back curve and your ass pop out. You gasp as you feel his hard shaft slide against the inside of your thighs, head tilting back as the thought of having him stretching you out sends a hotness across your body.

His hands move back around to stroke up and down the length of your back lovingly, even massaging your shoulders for a moment or two. You feel his hand meet the centre of your back applying enough pressure to guide you down, so you are now leaning with your fore arms holding you up and your ass is perched up- giving Will a delicious view.

‘Fuck you’re so gorgeous.’ his words are accentuated as his fingertips graze up your curved back gently, passing over all your dips and curves. Rose tinted stretch marks litter your skin and as his slightly coarse fingertips pass over them you let out a deep breath that you’d held in, curving your back and sticking your ass out even more in the process. This slight action earns you a satisfied groan from Will and you feel his length slip between your folds teasingly, as you try to push onto the feeling his length is gone and you feel it tap against the inside of your thigh.

As his fingertips continue their passing over your flesh, back and forth over the middle of your back, dipping down onto your hips where your curves accentuate, he hums to himself while his fingers spread over the soft flesh and squeeze slightly. Your head rocks down, a warm breath slipping past your lips, the soft squeeze on your flesh is filled with so much love and affection. You can feel the passion pass from his fingertips into your body- sending another warm, wet rush to your core.

Every touch from Will causes a shudder in your stomach that sends your head nearly spinning, your pussy dripping with a mix of your wetness and his saliva. Just his fingers gently digging into your hip is making you desperate for more of him.

All of him.

‘Please, Will.’ slips past your lips in a near whisper, a light shudder spreads over your body as your core clenches on nothing again. You feel the loss of one of his hands, only for it to return to your flesh in a sharp, quick spank on your cheek. You gasp slightly, letting out a breathy moan as his hand grips the now reddened flesh, soothing the skin with his gentle caress.

‘You like that, Angel?’

His voice is quieter than usual as if he was lost in the sight of you, lust spewing from his raspy tone. You hum in response but gasp again when his hand returns in a harsher spank to the same spot that only just began to cool after the last hit. ‘You know you need to use your words, angel. Try again.’

‘Yes Will, I like it.’ Your chest is heavy, you feel your wetness slick against your inner thighs, especially after the last spank.

‘Hmm, good girl.’ He mumbles, almost to himself as he works his thumb over the sore flesh of your cheek, admiring his work.

Finally, you feel his tip slip through your folds, collecting your wetness onto his shaft and swirling his hot tip around your clit. You hold your breath tight in your chest as his tip finds your aching pussy gently, teasing your entrance cruelly.

Just when you thought he’d fill you up, another spank arrives harshly against your flesh. This time you can’t hold back the deep, guttural moan that escapes you.

You gasp out in a mix of shock and pleasure when his tip pushes into you and he eagerly fills you up, giving you no time to prepare for the stretch. It burns you deep, aching when his tip finds the deepest spot in you. ‘God, Will. Fuck, it’s so tight.’ You cry out as your eyes fill with tears from the pressure of the stretch.

‘So fucking perfect.’ you mumble, mostly to yourself as he adjusts his position so you feel his thighs against your own. ‘Jesus christ,’ he grunts breathlessly as you try to squeeze around him but fail from how much he’s already stretching you out.

The first stroke is painful, his hips slowly drawing back only halfway before filling you up again just as slowly, and you feel like you could cum already from how blissful it is. Both of your moans intertwine as he repeats the action, this time pushing into you harder. Your hands grip the couch cushion so hard your knuckles ache, his hands still digging into the flesh of your hips.

He circles his hips, the swollen tip of his cock pushing against you deeply while one of his hands retreats from your hip to slide up into your hair roughly. You feel him adjust his position again and you grip the cushion as hard as you can, preparing for what comes next.

‘Please Will, I want it. I need it.’ Your words are faint; he’d have to listen closely to hear them. Luckily for you, there’s not a day that goes by where Will never fails to listen to you as attentively as possible.

‘Angel always gets what she wants, doesn’t she?’

With one last soft stroke, his hand grips your hair roughly, his fingernails nearly piercing your skin and his cock retreats almost fully before slamming back into you. Your gasps get caught in your throat as he creates a rapid, rough pace that makes your ass slap against his v lines sharply. The sting of his cock as he pulls out, the pressure as he rips back into you- his hand gripping the roots of your hair so tight it feels as if your hair might rip out, his nails digging into your hip as his grip bruises your flesh.

All of it sends your head spinning, eyes pinched shut as his thrusts become harsher with every one that passes by, his deep groans get caught between your own gasps for air and the lewd noises of your flesh slapping together.

You can’t think of anything else as the feeling of his cock ripping into you overwhelms all your senses, your mind zoned in on how his length drags so perfectly against the deepest parts of you. You feel it in your gut when his hips meet your ass, hitting the reddened flesh creating obscene noises that make your pussy gush around him.

‘Fuck you’re taking me so well, angel- so fucking well.’ his words blur together with the sensation that builds throughout your whole body as you mutter out incoherent words and pornographic noises that you have no control over.

The earth-shattering pleasure Will is giving you makes your body burn all over, your thighs shake every time his tip meets a space deeper than your g spot, past your cervix into what feels like is in your guts.

‘Imma make you cum over and over again, baby, give my girl what she deserves. How's that sound to you?’ you moan in response, nodding your head as best as you can. He pulls at your hair harshly making your head tilt upwards.

‘I can’t give you what you want if you don’t use your words, angel. You should know this by now.’ his tone is arrogant and it makes you whimper as he leans over your body to grab your arms from under your head. He drags them behind you, pinning them against your back with the hand that was just in your hair, his other hand leaving your hip to grip the sofa to steady himself.

His thrusts transition from fast and long to short and sharp, drilling into the part of you that he knows you love the most. Your thighs tremor, it’s becoming harder to hold yourself up from how the aching in your pussy spreads over your whole body, leaving it weak. A thin layer of sweat coats both your bodies, beads slipping down the back of your thighs from where your bodies connect.

You feel your orgasm begin to approach, crying out from the sensation that tightens in your stomach.

‘Let it happen, baby. I've got you.’ Will’s words almost get lost in the feeling of your stomach bursting, but the reassurance lets you slip over the edge completely. You gasp as your head spins and your thighs shake ruthlessly as they try to hold you up through the intensity. Your ears ring, your vision blurs, your moans come to a momentary halt before a cross between a wail and cry breaks in your throat. Will fucks you through the whole thing, his grip on your wrists that he pins against your back grounding you back to the moment as you come down from your high.

You're left a breathless, teary mess as he pulls out slowly to ease any discomfort.

Your minds still so blurry that you don’t realise Will has laid you onto your back until a couple minutes later, which is also when you finally take a deep breath that cleanses your lungs from the restriction your gasping created.

When you open your eyes, Will is kissing down your neck, face flush and a bead of sweat is rolling down his forehead.

‘You okay my love?’ his words are tender, a contradictory from the orgasm that just crashed down on you. You mumble a reply, smiling to him as a gentle wave of joy rushes over you. ‘You okay to keep going?’ he asks, you mumble another yes as you connect your lips with his.

The kiss is sweet and as tender as his concern, but when you slip your hand down to wrap around his pulsing cock he bites down onto your bottom lip with a groan. You feel your release slick around his cock, collecting it on the pads of your fingertips with a mix of his own juices, breaking the kiss to slip your fingers into your mouth while still holding eye contact with Will.

His eyes are wide, lips swollen and parted in shock at your dirty action. You suck your fingers clean of both of your juices before connecting your lips again, Will’s tongue pressing against your own to get a taste of your sweetness. Your hand returns to stroke his cock painfully slow, flicking your thumb over the tip that furiously leaks his juices.

‘You sure you can handle it again, babe?’ his tone is slightly smug but filled with so much sincerity, not wanting to push you past your limits. ‘Wanna feel you in me again, Will. I miss it.’ your words merge into the kiss and you feel his fingers trace gently over your swollen clit. You part from his lips to release a soft, airy moan when he circles the bud in tightly and his forehead meets yours.

‘You sound so beautiful, y/n. So fucking beautiful.’ your eyes flutter shut when his fingers push harder, the same airy moans slipping past your lips softly and his compliment sends your cheeks pink. He kisses along your exposed jawline, sucking gently on the skin.

‘Is it all for me, baby?’ his words vibrate against your throat, his fingers exploring down through your folds to collect your wetness and swipe it over your pulsing clit again. You feel another orgasm approaching, the floodgates already open from your last orgasm, and you struggle to form a reply from the pressure that’s building.

‘Fu- yes, Will- it's- ah- it's all for you.’ you force the words out between moans, your eyes fluttering open to meet his that swallow you completely in admiration. He kisses down your chest and sucks your nipple into his mouth, your hand finds its way into his hair as to ground yourself in the feeling that’s threatening to push you over the edge again.

He hums against your nipple causing you to gasp, his teeth grazing the bud deliciously as you finally muster up the strength to talk.

‘I’m gonna cum, fuck I'm gonna cum.’ your words are rushed as you grip his hair, pulling his mouth harder against your nipple as your orgasm washes over you, your head rocking back into the pillow beneath you. Your back arches up, pushing your nipple against his teeth daringly and he bites down causing another shudder to travel down your legs.

This orgasm isn’t as intense as your last but it’s just as beautiful, hitting you in multiple waves, each earning a louder gasp and a toothy smile to appear on your face. Your eyes are rolled into the back of your head, your legs tremoring on either side of his hips as you begin to come down with a heavy gasp and a whimper that pulls Will’s lips away from you with a smile.

It dawns on you that he hasn’t came yet and you begin to feel guilty, not being able to hide the worry from your face.

‘What’s wrong?’ he asks concerned and you ease his worry with a smile and shake of your head, still catching your breath as your play with his curls that hang messily from his head. ‘You haven’t came yet, babe.’ you try to hide your guilt but he catches on immediately.

‘I’m waiting, baby, wanna give you as much as possible before I come. Don’t worry about it my love.’ you may have over thought it any other day, but his genuine smile and tone makes you nod and let go of that stress.

His lips are on yours again before they trail across your jaw, under your ear to suck the sensitive skin between his lips. His tongue laps over the skin, his teeth grazing so gently it sends a shudder up your spine. He moves across to find your pulse point, humming against the skin to send a wave of vibration through your body. He mimics the same sucking as before, only this time his teeth dig into your skin to send your head rocking back into the couch.

All your senses are heightened. Suddenly you can smell traces of weed in the air from earlier, coconut in his locks and his musky cologne along his collar bones. Goosebumps cover your arms, your nipples peaking and poking into his warm chest. The TV glows, a low lamp keeping the rest of the room lit. A mix of your and his juices tingle on your tongue, your thighs clench at the taste; a reminder of the orgasms that leave your body flushed and aching perfectly.

You don't realise one of his hands had moved until you feel a finger slip into your cunt, a pool of warmth coating his finger and palm slick. Your breaths flow mindlessly through your soft, plump lips when he curves his finger into your g spot, your chest becomes tight from the repetitive action.

His finger leaves you, his mouth disconnects from your neck and he positions himself between your legs. He holds his soaked palm up between you both, grinning proudly to himself.

‘Making such a beautiful mess, angel.’ his raspy tone alone makes you desperate, burning with anticipation when you feel is swollen tip poking at your entrance teasingly, and when he slips his finger into his mouth, your juices pushing up to his knuckles in a ring before collecting on his lips you genuinely think you’re going to hyperventilate from the sight alone.

He finger slips from his mouth and before you can react his lips are pushed against yours, lathering them in your own juices. He pulls back, your tongue pokes out to collect the mess from your lips but his hand quickly catches you before you can, his fingers on either side of your face pushing your lips open and out in a pouting motion. His tongue licks your lips clean of your juices, not letting one drop go to waste.

Your chest is so tight it aches your ribs, you don’t think you’ll ever let your breath go until you feel his tip slowly slip into you. Will groans and even though you’re dripping wet, it still stings slightly from the stretch; but you wouldn’t have it any other way, the feeling of just the tip of him alone makes you suck another long breath in.

His hips continue forward, his cock slipping halfway in all at once making Will let out another deep groan and you wince. Not only is his size already a stretch, but you’re also still sore from being filled by him and fucked into the couch.

‘I know it’s so much angel,’ his hand rests on your throat without applying any pressure yet, your eyes flutter open to meet his. You must force your eyes to stay open, you’d be stupid not to watch how his face contorts as his tip finally rests against the deepest part of you. His girth stretches and fills you up sublimely, you moan deeply at the feeling that you can never get enough of.

Before moving his hips, he hooks an arm under your leg closest to the back of the couch and directs it to hang over the top of the couch. This sends your hips upwards, giving him perfect access to fill your guts.

‘Keep your leg up here for me, okay?’ you nod at his request, still so zoned in on how he fills you up. His body is inches away from yours again, his cock slipping against your sweet spot just from his readjusting.

He plants a small kiss on your forehead before pulling his hips away slowly, your chest rises with his stroke when he guides himself back into you. Both of you moan out together, your hand latching onto the back of his neck. Curses slip from both of you as he creates a slow, deep pace; drawing his hips back almost completely before pushing back into you at an agonising speed. When he fucks you like this, slow and deep, you can feel the veins on his cock as he pulls out, the slit on his tip grazing your upper wall as he pushes back into you. Both of you are already a panting mess, his hand beginning to add the slightest bit of pressure on your neck that makes your mind soft and cloudy.

‘Fuck, you’re taking me so well, y/n.’ his words nearly get caught in his chest when you squeeze around him, his tip edging against your cervix gorgeously. ‘Shit baby, you wrap around my cock perfectly. It's like your pussy was made for me.’ Your cheeks flush at his words, also because he adds more restriction to your throat, the tips of his fingers digging into the skin softly.

His thrusts start to become harder, dragging along your tight walls in languid strokes that send your head tilting back into the pillow beneath you and your other leg to hike up at the side of his hip.

He leans up onto his knees, pushing your leg that is folded up against your side out and gripping your knee that rests on the top of the couch, watching his cock as it stretches your cunt that squeezes its thickness every time he hits your sweet spot.

‘Jesus- fuck-’ he can’t form a coherent sentence, his eyes still shamelessly gawking at the sight of him fucking you as he mumbles something to himself that you can’t make out. His hand leaves your knee and begins to stroke over your folds, staring intently as his fingers slip across your swollen clit and his fingertips graze over your folds intently. Your breathing is becoming heavy, feeling another orgasm approaching you at a rapid rate.

Will notices this and pushes against your clit, only flicking his eyes up from between your legs for a moment to glance at your face as a you whimper; the pleasure nearly becoming too much.

He knows that if you don’t cum soon, you’ll become a whimpering, crying mess and that thought makes his cock twitch in you. His finger strums your clit slowly before switching up completely, flicking over the pulsing bud with his thumb frantically making you shout his name in shock. Your orgasm begins to shake your legs and just like that his thumb is gone and you cry out, sounding pained and awfully hot; Will lets out an animalistic moan as he leans down and uses his arms to cage you in and keep you in place.

If he didn’t do that you’d be thrashing around, which your body still tries to do when he begins to fuck your harder, picking his pace up ever so slightly but it’s enough to make you cry out again.

‘Take it, angel,’ his words drill into your ears, his hips rocking into you harder with every word ‘take it like the good girl you are.’ Your moans become high pitched and strained, having no control of the curses and chants of his name that leave your chapped lips. You gave up trying to keep your eyes open, letting them pinch shut as the pleasure sends your mind spinning.

‘Eyes open.’ he demands, to which you quickly comply and open them as much as you can. You take in the sight of him; his dishevelled hair that brushes against your forehead with his thrusts, his agape mouth, those fucking lips that can make you crumble in moments. You can’t stop yourself when your eyes find his defined jawline, leaning up to peck it before grazing your teeth across it, earning you a low groan from Will. His dark, deep eyes bore into you and you squeeze tightly on his cock again, this time mainly so you can see how his eyes roll into the back of his head.

When his eyes open again, your hand finds its way onto his back, your nails digging into his skin and dragging across his flesh. Just as you do this, you squeeze on his cock again, wanting to push him to the edge; hoping you’ll get a raise out of him. His eyes roll to the back of his head again, he groans deeply- sounding slightly pissed off.

‘I know what you’re doing, y/n.’ his tone is sharp, making your heart jump for a moment and your pussy drip along his cock. His eyes pierce into yours, you bite your lip nervously. ‘If you want me to fuck you, you should’ve just asked instead of being a slut about it.’ His words make you smirk through excitement, he chuckles to himself and shakes his head while speaking.

‘You really are a dirty slut, aren’t you?’ his words send another wave of pleasure through you and before you can stop it you let out an ear-splitting pornographic moan, maybe you should be ashamed of how this turns you on- but you couldn’t care less about shame when his cock hits you in the place that makes you giddy with satisfaction.

‘Eyes open, y/n’ his words are sharp, scolding you with a light spank to your clit making your eyes shoot open and the same shameless moan erupts from you- this time somehow louder. Your legs begin to tremor slightly, this warning both of you that you’re going to cum soon.

‘You just want to be treated like the dirty girl you are, don’t you?’ his words make your stomach twist, his hips now beginning to pick up their speed- giving you exactly what you need to take you over the edge again. ‘Say it.’ his demand makes your eyebrows twist in shock, feeling your cheeks flush in embarrassment.

‘Come on baby, if you can say it, I’ll give you exactly what you want- what you need.’ he teases you, knowing that you’ll do anything to cum all over his cock will he fills you up and fucks your juices together.

‘I- fuck, Will!’ you begin but cut yourself off when his speed picks up rapidly, still drilling into you at a torturously hard rate. ‘I just-’ your words are cut off again, this time by a whimper you can’t stop. Your tits bounce against Will’s chest every time he fills you up to the brim, it’s becoming a ridiculously hard task to keep your eyes open too. His moans make you clench on him over and over again, desperate for him to take you past the edge.

‘If you wanna cum I’m gonna need to hear the words come from your mouth, angel, so get to talking.’ he torments, his hips drilling into you. Just when you think he couldn’t get any obscener, he leans back to spit onto your tits, his hips never stopping their beautiful torture; he’s doing this not only because it drives him crazy, but because it’s always the last straw before your pussy explodes around his cock.

You know if you don’t get the words out ASAP he’ll deny you of your orgasm again and you wouldn’t be able to take it, so you hurry and manage to force the words out.

‘I just wanna be treated like the dirty slut I am! Will- please- I can’t-’ a tear rolls down your face, the pleasure overwhelming you. His fingers find your clit in slow, smooth strokes in contrast to his cock and finally he lets you crash over the edge.

‘There we go angel, let it all out. Cum all over my cock, doll.’ is the last thing you hear, his pleased grin being the last thing you see before ringing fills your ears, your eyes pierce shut and your head digs into the pillow below you. Your legs shake rapidly, your pussy convulsing on Will’s cock as you squirt on him, not hearing the obscene strangled moans that never stop leaving you or the noises of your juices that fill the room as he fucks you through the whole thing.

Will can’t hold back anymore and with a deep, guttural moan he slams his hips into you, his forehead resting against your own as his orgasm crashes through him in reckless, violent waves- just as yours did to you. Your pussy pulses on his cock, milking every drop of cum from him as you’re still encapsulated by your orgasm, practically screaming through the whole thing.

You both come down, thrown from the heights of your orgasms back to reality. Your breathing is rapid, trying to catch up with the lost breaths due to how much you were moaning, you’re unable to force your eyes open just yet. Will is in the same state as you, wrapped up in the blissful after math of such an intense orgasm.

You stay with his cock in you for a minute or two, coming back to your mind and opening your eyes tiredly. Will lifts his head from your neck to meet your loving gaze, both of you staring in complete awe and love for each other.

Slowly you both begin to untangle your limbs, him pulling out from you gently. Still lying on your back, so fucked out you don’t think you’ll be able to move for another hour, he kneels between your legs and watches as his cum drips out of your puffy pussy. He collects the fallen juices and gently, as to not hurt your sore entrance, fingers it back into your pussy; not letting a drop escape you.

Finally, you catch your breath, pulling Will down into a soft, slow kiss.

After a while of cuddling on the couch, talking about the events that just took place, Will convinces you to make your way upstairs so you can share a bath. When he helps you up to your feet, you gasp at the puddle of your juices that has sunk into the couch, Will widening his eyes with a devilish glint and proud grin.

‘Look at all the mess we made.’

————————————-

Thanks for reading💋💋💋

[dumbfloweralive]

Mystery Hack

Chapter 4: Goodbye

Machine Connor x Reader.

Warning: Brief mention of suicide, guns.

It felt overwhelming.

Elijah had ran toward you, tugging you in his arm, his hold tight on you. You hated being hugged, most of the time. It felt like an overwhelming sensation. Usually, you would either move back or, occasionally, you would slip one of your arms around the person, patting their back while your body would step aside, away from their body, your free hand hanging at your side.

When his arms sneaked around you, for a second, your body acted as usual, your hand patting Elijah’s back, your body leaning away from his body. Like a reflex.

The second after, something snapped in your head, his smell and presence invading you. Your chest ached from what you felt was loss or, maybe, it was hope. A pain as the world stopped spinning around you. All the movement stopped, you could finally breathe.

The third second, your arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him closer to you.

And, Elijah broke the embrace. He knew you were not comfortable with physical touch, probably seeing his own action as selfish toward you.

You pulled him back.

“I thought…” He started a grin on his face.

“Shut up.” you cut him short, your head falling on his shoulder, fighting the tears threatening to fall.

26 December 2035

The party was tiring, the crowd, the people, all of them made you sick. Elijah had stayed at your side, like a protector, but at some point the two of you got split. He was nowhere to be found and after two hours of speaking with a stranger who didn’t understand a thing about your job, doing small talk and who were more certain than you Elijah and you were dating, you felt exhausted. 

Therefore, you did the most mature thing you could do.

You ran away. 

It was 11 pm when you entered the lab, Elijah and you had in common at the Cyberlife tower. Your happy place. With a loud sight, you fell on your chair, closing your eyes.

“Good evening miss L/N” The voice came out of nowhere, making you jump out of fear.

You turned your head, following the sound of the voice, only to find Connor on his base, smiling at you.

“Jesus fuck. You scared the shit out of me, Connor.”

“Oh, I am sorry.” 

Your head turned back toward him, your eyes frowning. Something was wrong.

“What’s wrong with you? What did Elijah do to you?” You say, running to the android.

His cheeks were all blue, so was his forehead. The back of your hands fell on his cheeks softly, feeling the warmth of his body. Android couldn’t be warm. Connor was overheating.

“How the fuck does an android end up with a fever.” you whispered more to yourself, trying to find something to lower his temperature.

“Probably a mistake in my program. I am sorry.” He whispered as you dropped a cold blanket around him.

“Do not apologize, this is not your mistake.” You answered, heading toward Elijah’s computer.

It took an entire hour to find the mistake. At this point, Elijah had joined you in the lab, the two of you talking about the way he could improve the android just like the council asked. 

“I need your help.” He finally said.

“You know I can’t help you. Pretty sure the council doesn’t want anything to do with me.” You sight.

“I don’t care. This is still our firm. We are still CEO. You can do anything you want. I’ll back you up.”

He was sincere. Since the beginning, the two of you together had done the best android ever made. Markus had to be your greatest success. But you knew you could get more. And, to you, the best was an android self-aware of himself, able to think and act on his own.

“You know my point of view of the improvement we could make.” You said, wanting to be sure. “I won’t mind being the bad guy in the end if I get the results I want. Someone has to fulfil this job. We can do so much more than just androids. We could have perfection. A new form of intelligence.”

“Than go ahead. It’s all yours.” Elijah said, leaning at your side, his hand extending toward Connor. “Show them what you can do. I trust you.”

Your head turned to Connor, meeting his sweet brown eyes, who didn’t leave yours the whole time. He offered you a soft smile, the blue of his cheek had now disappeared.

“OK, I’ll do it.”

30 May 2039 00:10

The thought was unbearable.

When you thought about this reunion week before, you expected Elijah and you to be like strangers. How could it be otherwise? The two of you haven’t seen each other for the past three years. 

It would have been even easier to leave.

But no.

It was the opposite. As if it were the most natural thing, the two of you were actually speaking like nothing happened. Like the two of you had just seen each other the day before. Like the fight you had the day you left never happened.

He had made you a coffee, no sugar, even if it was past midnight. Old habit never changes.

Therefore, the thought of leaving cracked open your ribs, tearing your organs apart. After three years, you finally felt like breathing, getting part of your old life. But you would have to throw it away again.

How could it be bearable?

Your mission would make it bearable, you thought. You tried to convince yourself. 

In your hands remained all the cards capable of offering freedom to androids. To change popular opinion and ask for their support. All the cards that will bend the government to your demands.

If you failed, you would fail them all.

But you weren’t able to just change around Elijah, to act like, after all these years, he was nothing to you, no one. You had done it numerous times, pushing people away. 

Yet, this time, every time you acted neutral, cold, your heart broke in your chest, making you shift behaviour. He looked so happy by your only presence, you didn’t want to rip that memory from your mind.

Why this had to end?

“You look older.” He said, watching your long hair before tugging one strand behind your ear.

“Well, so do you. Nice shave, by the way. Look cleaner than your prolonged teenage years.” You said, teasing.

He laughed, then, a silence fell after that, your finger toying with the aim of the cup. You could feel his eyes on you, feel the thousands of questions he wanted to ask. And you wondered why he was so quiet. It wasn’t him. 

You knew him too well, even more than he knew himself.

He always liked to brag around about what he did, talking about his discoveries, new film, new everything, really about anything. Elijah’s mind felt uncomfortable in silence, you knew that, genuine thought running in his head like a processor. Same way, he hated being lonely. Which was pretty strange given the fact he was living in a gigantic house, away from any being on earth.

 Genius brain.

So, him being this quiet felt odd.

They were two geniuses mind in the same room and suddenly, none of them were able to talk, until.

“So, you are behind RA9? Aren’t you?” He asked, his eyes searching for yours.

“You’ve seen that show on the TV too?” You asked, a smile on your face. He nodded no with his head, and your eyes frowned.

“Connor came to me a few months ago, asking questions about RA9. I didn’t code it, you were the only one with access to all the code. My assumptions were true if what they said in this TV show is true.”

“It is true.” 

“What was the agreement with the council? I want the real reason you left. No lies.” 

Finally, your eyes found his. They looked tired, you thought to yourself now that you took time to study it. He looked tired in general.

“They wouldn’t deactivate Connor as long as i leave Cyberlife for good and… If i cut any string attach.” You said, your eyes falling back to the coffee in your hands as your voice had lowered at the end of your sentence.

When Cyberlife’s council explicitly told to leave and to cut any contact, you knew what they implied. Though your little Vendetta against them had already been planned in your head, you didn’t want Elijah to be associated with this. 

Didn’t want to ruin his life.

“So, ruining our friendship was the best way for you to leave?” He asked, his calm tone betraying anger in it.

“No” you started, crossing your legs in front of you. “Ruining our friendship was the best way to have you out of my plan and out of my way.” you said, your voice turning cold. 

He kept his gaze hold on you for a while, studying your reaction. Perhaps you might have forgotten he knew you, too, better than you knew yourself.

“You’re lying.”  He simply said.

“Yes.”

“How bad it is for you to hide it behind such a lie?” 

You took a second sip of your coffee, thinking of the best way to approach the talk. He knew when you would lie. 

“I did it because i wanted to protect you.” You found the strength to look back at him yet again. “I needed to protect you in many ways and for different reason i can’t talk about but just…” You paused, arch breath coming out of your chest. “I just genuinely care about you.” He knew, drawing such words out of you was difficult. 

He didn’t say anything at first. Probably out of fear you would stop talking, stop opening up if he talked now. Therefore, he kept looking at you, seeing you fighting with yourself. His hand raised forward and landed on yours, still holding the cup of coffee.

How could he be angry at you?

“You can talk to me.” He whispered when the silence lasted.

“I know. I just can’t tell you this. Because then, you’ll be in danger.” Your eyes fell on his. “ I can’t lose you.”

“Because you think i can lose you?” He whispered, leaning forward. “I’ve spent the last three years being miserable because you weren’t around. I opened up to you, years ago, i said i needed you in my life. How the hell do you think that would have changed years after that?” You expected him to be angry, but he kept whispering, protecting you from the screams. “I still need you in my life.” He confessed.

“Don’t you think i’ve been miserable?” You shook your head. “I spend every day of the last three years wondering if all i was doing was worth breaking our friendship. I still need you in my life, but it can’t be the only variable in the program. Not after what happened with the deviant last fall.” You paused, holding his piercing blue eyes. Elijah took his hand away from yours, moving to your face.

His eyes frowned as he swiped a tear that had found is way out.

“You don’t look old. You look tired.” He started, his eyes falling outside the window. “You felt that too?” He asked.

“All i ever wanted for this revolution was for them to win, and they didn’t, they slaughtered them Elijah, like they were nothing. And it was all my fault. If i had been there, i could’ve stop it.” 

“It’s not your fault. No one could’ve stopped it. Not even us.” He comforted you.

 It pained him as much to see the android loose. Especially after seeing Connor that day, knowing he felt empathy, as he never shot Chloe.

“They break my heart.” You paused. “When they died, i felt like a part of me died with them.”

“Me too.” He said, his eyes searching for Chloe, before returning to you. “You're back on an anti-depressant, aren’t you?”

You rolled your eyes, the words “no” ready to slip out of your tongue. But you knew better than lying to him. You didn’t answer, which it gave him the answer he wanted. The two of you, constantly worrying about each other. Elijah could feel how vulnerable you were at the moment. He always feared for your potential action. After all, he never forgot your suicidal attempt. 

It was unbearable. The thought of leaving him again. The idea of losing the only real friend you had. But you had no choice. A surge of hope lightened in you, hoping that, perhaps, if God was kind, he will let the two of you met again.

“Come on. Let’s play a game. Anything.” He said, raising from the couch. 

“Get that chessboard so i can beat your ass.” You said, observing around you. His place hadn’t changed. What would he think of yours? Your new place. You wondered.

“I improved myself, i doubt you could beat me.”

“Well see.”

For the next hour, you two played together, the party lasting longer because, yes, he did in fact improved, which he didn’t miss an opportunity to brag about. But you had always been two-step ahead of him.

That’s why you knew he had called the cops. You knew him, enough to know he would rather see you alive and arrested than dead. It was his worst fear.

“You know, i’ll always win.” You started, watching at the watch on your wrist. You would have to leave soon. “I am about to take your king in like… 3 moves.” Your heart tightened in your chest. “So? Do you withdraw?” You asked, raising from your seat, your coat on you.

“What are you doing?” He said, his eyes frowning at your move.

“I am about to win the party, i always have two-step ahead of you at least. Therefore, i need to escape before the cops arrived.” Elijah raised from his seat.

“Y/N i…” He started.

“It’s okay, i understand, really.” You said, moving closer to him. A small smile formed on your lips, wanting to be reassuring, as your hands moved to cup his face. “Elijah, i need you to promise me something.” You started.

“No. Don’t you dare. You promised.” He said, composing himself.

“I know. I just need to know that, whatever happen next, you’ll be happy. You’ll keep on living. Can you do that?” You asked, seeing the red and blue light coming in the hallway.

“You promised me.” He said, his hand falling over yours, stopping you from moving away.

“I know. But i need to finish something important. Promised me Elijah. Whatever happen, don’t be angry, don’t be sad for too long. One day, you’ll be happy.” Your hands slipped from his face, as you moved away, your hands grasping one last time at his hands. “Promised me Elijah.” You started hearing the sound of the siren.

His eyes fell on the ground, breaking the physical contact you had. “I promised.” He whispered. “The back door is open.” He continued.

“Thank you.” you said before turning away, running toward the exit.

“Y/n…” He called as you turned away one last time. “Whatever you have plans, you won’t be able to fulfil it. Connor is after you. The moment you’ll see him injured, on the verge of getting destroyed or shut down, you’ll run to his side to save him. You love him so much, even if he was on the verge of killing you, you wouldn’t press the trigger to stop him.”

“I know.” 

And you were gone.

Running toward the forest as fast as you could. Everything was working as you plan. The interrogation, pissing off Connor to a point he felt anger, escaping, bonus point for meeting and seeing Elijah one last time and, escaping again. 

This, was the last line before the end.

One last line before you’ll disappear forever.

And, as you ran toward the bridge, you thought you were ahead of the FBI agent, not hearing anything around you.

That was until something hard hit you from the side, projecting you on the ground.

“Fuck” You shoot, your body aching from the fall. 

You looked around, finding Connor next to you, lying on the ground. He surely fell with you too. It didn’t seem like he expected the damage the fall would cause him. Connor was barely moving. Your eyes found something between you. A gun. You throw yourself on the weapon, taking it in your hands as Connor finally moved to stop you.

But it was too late.

The gun was in your hand, aiming at him. His hands raised, unthreatening. Connor didn’t move, assessing the best option he had, all of them leading him to the next conclusion. You’d shot him before he even reached you. Useless for the case.

Only, he didn’t expect you to be… You.

Despite the strong grip you had on the gun, you couldn’t press the trigger. You wouldn’t hurt him. Elijah was right. 

Damn you Kamski, you swore in your head, trying to find something, anything. Connor looked almost scared when you step forward. Your hand holding the gun fell at your side as you walked toward him.

“I never would.” You said, before running away again, the gun still in your hand, hoping to get to the bridge in time.

And you did. You stopped in the middle of it when you saw the FBI cars and the agent coming down of them. In a second, they were circling you, forcing you to back up against the guardrail. You stopped on it.

“Stop this, we need her alive.” Connor's voice pierced through the crowd as he ran toward you, pushing away any agent in his way.

Then, his eyes fell on you, standing over the edge. His LED flickered a soft yellow amber, processing information. Connor moved to you slowly, his hand raised to you, offering his hold.

“Come on, get down, we just need you to deal with the RA9 code, if you succeed, i am sure the judge will be more inclined to your fate.” Connor started.

“Wow, you’re such a smart ass, like i cared about time in jail.” 

Of course, that’s not what you cared for. Connor knew it. He needed to understand you further, he needed to think out of boxes. He felt like his heart missed a beat when he saw you moving further away from him, ready to fall, the feeling of deja-vu playing in his mind again. 

That scared him, you on the verge of falling scarred him. You couldn’t want to kill yourself, right? And then, it clicked in his mind.

“I understand. You created all of them, all of us. They are the work of your life, you want them to be free.” He started.

“Finally, you’re using that brain.” 

“You need to understand, it can’t happen, machine can’t have emotion. You should know that, you are their creator.” He continued, his hand still raised toward you. You were tempting to just take it. “I understand you do not wish for them to be destroyed. Perhaps we can figure things out, together.” His fingers brushed against yours, his synthetic skin retracting once again, showing the white chassis underneath. “Please, get down. We won’t hurt you.”

His voice was southing you, you were almost ready to gave in. It was so tempting, but you know, when speaking of Connor, you had always let your guards down. His fingers brushed your palms slowly, inviting you down, his chassis showing further, following your touch.

“Please.” He said, like a soft plea.

You crossed his eyes. He was scared and worried. It wasn’t the first time he’d looked at you this way. But then, movement caught you off guard, one of the FBI agent moving forward, raising his gun. Connor immediately saw the changed in you. Without ever breaking contact with you, his arm raised  to the agent.

“Stop this. She won’t cooperate if she feels threatened. We need her alive.” He said, his finger grasping at your palm.

“Too bad then.” You felt his entire body tensed the second the words left your lips.

But it was too late. Connor felt your hand slipping out of his hold as you fell, he throws his body forward hitting the guard-rail, his hand extended as possible, trying to catch your hand but all he saw was your body falling in the void before hitting the water. He stood there, hand hanging in the void, his body against the solid cold metal, staring at the water. 

What has he done?

He felt a strong pain inside him, clawing at his chest in a desperate attempts to ease it, as the diagnosis showed no sign of problem. Yet, the pain continued crawling up in his body, never stopping. He couldn’t feel pain, he tried to convince himself.

He didn’t know how long he stayed like this, looking at the place your body hit the water. Connor only found back his senses when the agent who threatened you, stood at his side, started saying:

“Be ready to look for a dead body in the morning. Let’s get home.”

“We needed her alive” Connor said, feeling his blue blood running wild in his biocomponent. Was that anger?

“She jumped, not our fault.”

Then, something snapped in him. He felt his body tensing up as he throws himself at the agent, grabbing him by the collar of his jacket, bringing his body over the water. If he let go, there would be more than one death tonight.

“The fuck are you doing, stupid android, put me down.” The agent said, desperately grabbing the edge of the guardrail.

“She jumped because you fucking threatened her, She felt unsafe. Y/N did it because she didn’t see any other choice.” 

All he wanted was to push the man over the bridge, ending his life for being so wreckless, for hurting you. For causing your death. A “software instabilities” showed up in his vision. And he let go of the man, bringing him back to safety on the ground.

For a few seconds, he kept staring down at where your body hit the water, this feeling still present in his chest. He wanted to collapse on the ground. 

Instead, he walked back to the car, joining back agent Wilson as they returned to Elijah’s house. Connor looked at the time in the car, his chest heavy when he said.

“Time of death: 2 AM 42, May 30”

30 May 2039 2 AM 59

They just parked in Kamski’s alley when the silence in the car broke.

“I’ll talk to him.” Wilson started, heading out of the car, but Connor stopped him.

“No, i’ll do it.” He said, moving toward the door.

He knocked a first time, getting an immediate answer, Chloe opening the door. She looked different from usual, leading Connor immediately to Elijah, without words to invite him or form of politeness. She passed the door leading to the pool where he first met Kamski. This one was standing in front of the window, looking at the black night.

“Mr Kamski.” Connor started, getting an immediate answer from the man who turned around. Connor didn’t know how to phrase the truth. He knew he should be clear in his words, yet somehow, the words were stuck in his vocal cords, the picture of your fall playing in his mind again. Therefore, he chooses simple. “I am sorry, Y/N jumped from the bridge, we weren’t able to prevent her act.”

He didn’t even any idea about why he felt that way. You were his mission. He had to stop you, and he did. Yet, somehow, it felt wrong.

“No.” Elijah said, sitting on the couch, the truth of your presence sitting right in front of him on the table. “No you’re wrong.” Chloe run away. Connor saw her leaving the room. He didn’t chase her. “Y/N can’t be dead, she… She was here an hour ago.” 

“She jumped from the bridge 20 minutes ago.” Wilson stated, standing right behind Connor. “I am sorry for your loss, Mr Kamski.”

A tear fall runned on Elijah cheek, processing the words he just heard. He felt his world crumbling under his feet, getting swallowed all. Connor was speaking, but he couldn’t comprehend a thing he said. So, Connor stopped, waiting. Elijah brought his hand to his chest, just like Connor did minutes before. The pain, so much pain.

“A team will be looking for her body in the morning. You’ll be able to say goodbye.” Winston said, knowing well the man didn’t want any goodbye. Grief. “I know that’s not what you want, but it will be the best we can do.”

“She’s dead now. And it’s your fault.” Kamski said, eyeing Connor. “She trusted you, and you killed her.” 

“I didn’t… I tried to catch her.” 

“You liar. Get out of my house.” 

Connor was about to talk again, but he felt Wilson’s hand on his shoulder, seeing a little nod from him. 

“You loved her.” Wilson said. 

Elijah eyes shifter, his brow frowning. “Of course i loved her, she was my best friend, the only person who understand me. She was everything to me,” he kept himself from saying more, feeling the crack in his voice. 

“If you loved her, why did you turn her to the cops?” Connor asked.

Elijah didn’t answer, his eyes lost on Connor’s. He felt the anger building inside of him, but he recognised something else. He wasn’t the only one angry here. Connor was too. Which meant, not everything was lost. It gave him a hint of hope.

“I don’t expect an android to understand the deepness of human friendship.” Elijah started, his finger brushing tears falling. “Get out, we are done here, i have nothing to say.” He said, showing them the front door.

They did, turning around, none of them noticed Elijah’s phone buzzing, nor the way he froze in front of the screen.

30 May 2039, 5 AM

Connor was standing still in front of the house, unaware as if he should ring at such a late hour. He didn’t even know why he was here in the first place. Maybe your suicide had shaken him up more than he expected. He didn’t know.

His fist raised to the wooden door, knocking a first time and a second time. 

Why would he want to see him after all? After what happened?

“Lieutenant Anderson?”

Connor prevented Lieutenant Anderson from his suicide attempt that famous night. Now only, Connor realised Hank might have waited longer but did end up killing himself. But, he found no death record.

He pushed the door open, finding it unlock. The house was empty. No traces of human living here, no traces of Sumo. Hank didn’t live here any more. Connor sat on the floor of the house, waiting a few minutes before he finally retrieved the force of moving, closing the door behind him, heading toward the Cyberlife tower, a huge weight on his shoulder.

30 May 2039, 9 AM

“The ex co-CEO of the Cyberlife company, known as Y/N L/N recently revealed to the public had been reported dead after a suicide, following a track by FBI agent. The police are actively searching for her body after she jumped off the bridge. We will give you news as soon as we know more.” The TV shut down.

“I am officially dead.” You stated, turning toward your team. “Now, the real game start.” Markus was standing next to you, handing you the Vendetta mask. 

“Let’s win this war.” He said, a smile on his face.

30 May 2039, 1 am 52

You rushed out of the water, freezing, your entire body aching from the fall. It had worked. Everything worked out perfectly. Joel was running toward you with a blanket, urging you out of the water.

“We need to leave, now.” He said, pressing your footsteps.

“Yeah, i know, but my body ached right now.”

“I guessed that.” 

He helped you climb on the black van, as North started the car, looking at you over your shoulder.

“Are you in any pain?” She asked.

“Don’t worry, i’ll be fine, let’s go.” You rushed, using the blanket to warm yourself up. “We’ll have a clear vision in the morning. We need to be at the tower as soon as possible.”

“We’ll be there, don’t worry.” North tried to comfort you.

“Yeah, i know, sorry.” You tape Joel shoulder. “Give me your phone.” 

30 May 2039 2 am 15 Kamski’s house.

Elijah heard the vibration of his phone on the table, seeing Connor and Wilson leaving. With anger, he took it, ready to throw it against the window before the text took him off guard.

It was from an unknown number.

“I’ll always be two-step ahead of you.

                                  With love. “

A smile crossed his face through the tears running down his cheeks as he fell on the ground.

“Damn you” He whispered.

Thank you for your patience while waiting for this, thank you for still showing interested when i lost interest. Thank you all. I'll post the next part as soon as possible 🫶

[inourselveswetrust]

Can you give us August POV after visiting mc, pleaseeee?

This was more challenging than I expected! Mostly because to write this well, I would need to write a ton of variations to account for the choices you may (or may not have) made.

However, here it is! In all its "I wrote this at 3AM glory" 💀

“Are you even listening to me, Merritt?” a voice huffs beside them, startling August from their wandering thoughts. 

No, they are not listening, and they haven’t been for the past half hour. Their mind has been far too focused on their former partner – whom they intruded on mere hours ago. Right now, their head is a muddled mess, and their attention could not be any further from the investigation they should be working on. 

“How could I not? You’re practically shouting,” August replies, unable to keep bitterness from tainting their tone. “I bet the entire neighbourhood is listening too.”

“You’re an asshole,” Officer Patel grumbles, directing a glare toward them. “No wonder your last partner broke their oath, they were desperate to be away from you.”

“Fuck you,” August seethes, biting back every instinct inside them daring them to pummel the officer. “Don’t say their fucking name, don’t even think about them.”

Patel’s frustration seems to wither, replaced by an expression August recognizes. Nervousness, regret, and fear. Lately, these glances and stares have become far too familiar. 

The entire department has been walking on eggshells around them. It’s as if they all know August is about the explode or – maybe – implode. As if August is something fragile, something meant to be handled with care and caution.

August wonders if they know how right they are. Perhaps their colleagues recognize the dangerous glint in their eyes and the pattern of uncalculated, foolish risks August has taken ever since you left.  

“I’m sorry,” Officer Patel murmurs with a wince, far too aware of the precarious situation he’s in. “I’m going to go patrol on foot, I’ll radio you.”

With an excuse made, Patel hastily exits the patrol vehicle and practically runs from August. Good August thinks to themselves, they’re grateful for the solidarity. For the space.

Time to think.

They never needed alone time when you were their partner. In fact, they loathed being away from you – even if just for moments. But lately, the loneliness has been getting to them and keeping them up at night as sleep evades them. A consequence of a guilty conscience. 

August stares down at their hands, their fingers twitching as they forcefully remind themselves of your encounter. The moment their world felt whole again.

Seeing your face brought peace August has known for months, regardless of the hostile expression you wore specifically for them. They told themselves they would only seek you out once – they wouldn’t harass you – but now, they’re not sure they can go on without seeing you again.

They knew then, and they know now how selfish it was. It almost pained them to be so self-serving, but they needed to see you. They needed to ambush you. They needed to know you were okay – or as okay as you possibly could be.

They knew it would hurt you. They knew you weren’t prepared to see them. They knew you weren’t ready to forgive, and, more painfully, they know you never forgive. They can never earn back your trust, your loyalty or you.

Their fist bashes into their temple repeatedly as they will the thoughts away. Demand the pain leave by creating more, how ironic they think grimly.

A shuddering breath escapes August, a strangled, wheezing, pathetic exhale. They gasp for air; their lungs feel as if they’re collapsing. Tears mare their ivory cheeks, a cascading waterfall of hurt. 

Even as their head throbs and their heart aches, they pray. 

They pray something – or someone – will come to take away your pain. 

[loganlostitall]

Better Off Dead

Rating: ehh… I’ll go with 13+

Word count: 2k

Characters: Rick Grimes x Gender neutral reader

Setting: Alexandria, after TOWL ep 1 (SPOILERS!!!)

Content warnings: HUGE SPOILER WARNING FOR THE NEW EPISODE!!!!!!!! YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR OWN READING!!! That’s two warnings don’t blame me. Self harm and suicidal ideation, this is an almost entirely mental health related drabble. Heavy talk of cutting and scars. Typical TWD themes.

Summary: FINAL SPOILER WARNING! Rick hasn’t even been back for a full day. He is also not the only one who suffered a psychiatric decline over the years you spent apart. Both you and him are unaware that the other was in a similar spot. Hurt/comfort ensues.

Author’s note: Did NOT expect to be writing a Rick x reader in the middle of the goddamn night but my theory about Rick’s hand got proven right within not even five minutes and I was losing my shit. I started trying to think of plot immediately and once I saw more on mental health I was gone. Me and my love for mentally ill men <3

I wanted to post this the same night as release it fought me hard 😭 never expected to be doing Rick x reader and wanted to be perfect. Once again, the title is linked to the songspo so you can listen along.

Unbeta’d again, hope this is decent for u guys :3

The very moment you woke up, the first thing you became aware of was the fact that you found yourself in bed alone. Not unlike all the other nights. It was routine by now. The occasional, unique circumstance of this particular morning though, was the urge. Unshakable. All encompassing. It crashed through your brain and down into your body, pulsing through your veins, begging to be drawn out and released. Trapped under your skin. Grief.

It was almost completely overwhelming, tears flooding your lower eyelids and venturing down to your lips just as a strangled sob ripped from between them, the sound a little hoarse from your voice being unused during sleep.

You reached out blindly to the nightstand, your fingers grasping for the knife you always kept at your bedside in case of waking up to a walker breach or anything similar. Even through blurred vision, you found the handle, and brought the blade to the criss-crossed skin of your arm.

What a way to start off the morning with a bang.

Inflicting harm over previously healed scars always made you flinch harder. But you didn’t care that it hurt more. If anything, you appreciated it. It was more effective, faster. You never felt the need to leave quite as many.

Hissing through your teeth, you sat the knife down on your knee and brought your pointer and middle fingers to either side of the new wound and spread it open, luring more blood to flow out. It tickled as the thick crimson rolled down your wrist and came to a stop right where the skin curves to the heel of your palm, and you grabbed the handle once more to start the process over again.

Halfway through the next was when the door creaked.

You practically jumped out of your skin, throwing the reddened blade to clatter on the floor and snatching the covers to pull back over yourself, press them to your arm. Your free hand wiped the tears from your face as you sniffled, clearing up your sight well enough to see….

Rick. Blue eyes darkened by confusion and worry.

He stepped in cautiously, taking care to slowly and quietly shut the door behind himself and return his attention back to you. “Hey, what are you doing that for?”

“Wh— what the fuck?”

It left you as no more than a whisper, and you knew that same confusion was reflected on your own face. Rick wasn’t supposed to be here. ‘Am I hallucinating?’

“No, you’re not hallucinating. I’m right here.” Rick had nearly asked if you were okay, but stopped himself short. He’d just walked in on you cutting yourself, there was only one answer that you would, or could, give him.

You were apparently not fully awake yet, or you were still reeling from the self harm, because you’d seemingly asked the question out loud and not in your head.

His manufactured arm piece remained immobile at his side while his real hand patted himself absently in various locations, the pockets of his shirt as well as on each side of his jeans, searching for something although knowing that it wasn’t there. Rather than stand there idiotically, Rick held up a finger to signal ‘one second’ and made his way further into the room, dropping to one knee to pick up the knife you’d flung down carelessly and wiping the blood onto his shirt. And then, while he was down there, he pulled open each drawer of your nightstand until he actually found what he was looking for. Bandages. Or, more specifically, a small med kit with bandages in it. Packed full of random, useful supplies.

He remained kneeling at your bedside and spoke as he opened it. “Already forgot that you have me back?” His smile had an odd edge to it, like he was happy to see you but simultaneously disheartened by the state you were in, and concerned about the fact you’d forgotten. There was so much emotion on his face your eyes filled again.

“Yeah, I guess, I-”

You jumped when Rick pulled the blanket away from your arm and instinctively drew it back toward your chest, shielding the mess of dried blood from his worried gaze, but he simply reached for it again and coaxed it back to himself. Tentatively, not one sign of upset visible on him.

As he assessed the damage, you ashamedly looked elsewhere and returned to what you had previously been saying. “When Siddiq was still around, he diagnosed me with C-PTSD. Honestly, I think we all have something like that by now.” Laughing weakly, you bit the inside of your cheek for a few moments as Rick took care to clean the area with a small, square cloth soaked with witch hazel. It wasn’t the medication that burned, just the contact. You carried on. “He told me one of the side-effects would be my memory. Short-term, long-term, or even both… so, probably that and the fact I dreamed about finding you as a walker and having to put that knife between your eyes.”

A flare of insecurity sparked in your chest when that last statement had Rick’s eyes flitting to yours. Suddenly you found yourself critically self-conscious that he’d decide you were too much work now and leave to find better. Memory problems? Who would bother dealing with that?

“Okay,” he said surely, his voice steady. “That’s okay.” You were overwhelmed with the urge to hug him, but it would have to wait until you had your arm back. After a moment of eye contact for a second time, Rick patted the skin dry with a square of gauze and shook a small bottle of bactine before spraying a thin layer on top of the area.

The tingle of numbness was immediate. You sighed in relief as he rolled a Q-tip covered in Vaseline over each laceration and used that same last piece of gauze to delicately wipe up the excess surrounding them. And then to preserve resources, Rick opted not to open another and instead flipped that pad over to lay the dry side on your wrist; wrapped a length of blue self adherent cohesive bandage around it a few times to keep the wound dressing in place. Brought the heel of your palm to his lips, only to pause when his eyes wandered to find the array of scars littering your inner forearm. There was one in particular that he couldn’t take his attention off of.

Trailing the pad of his thumb down the length of your arm, you glanced down to see what he was looking at.

And felt nauseous.

“This one?” he asked faintly, voice barely discernible. Jagged, raised skin followed your radial artery vertically. Perpetrated on yourself while you’d searched for him.

You shrugged in an attempt to play it off as a lot calmer than you actually were. “Didn’t go deep enough.” Shame, once again, enveloped you. You felt fucking pathetic.

“Me either.”

The words felt like a bucket of ice water being dumped right over your head. Freezing your entire body, soaking your flesh and seeping beneath it to chill your bones. Your eyes found his natural fingers to discover that they were pulling his shirt collar away from his neck to reveal a slash that scabbed very recently going about a fourth of the way across his throat. Your vision swam again.

“You’re here now,” you tried. It was a lousy consolation, but you still weren’t… entirely grounded yet. Pushing yourself up to sit on your knees, Rick muttering ‘careful’ under his breath as you put weight on the hand connected to your injured arm to lean the upper half of your body off the edge of the bed, you nestled your lips just above the new scar and kissed his thrumming pulse. “We’re both here.” The two of you were equally as anxious; the way his heart was racing proved that fact. Perhaps even for the same reasons. Feeling exposed.

It was hardly a long journey from Philadelphia to Virginia. You made it back with Rick before the day was over. Subsequently, he had barely been here for twelve hours. Perhaps you hadn’t spent enough time together yet for the fact that Rick was home to truly register with you.

It seemed he may have had the same idea.

He offered you a tired half-smile and stood, closing up the med kit and returning it to its previous location only to round to the other side of the bed, make quick work of kicking off his boots, and climb in beneath the blanket. Rolling to face him, you sidled up to rest your forehead on his chest immediately, and his genuine arm fell over your side whilst the sculpted metal one lie idle beneath the pillows. The numbing from bactine was still a thing to revel over because it meant you could throw your arm over his bicep and card your fingers through the curls at the nape of his neck. You did not miss Rick’s short hair. His fingers soothed up and down your back in a comforting manner and you both laid utterly still, breathing the same air, sharing the same body heat.

“I’m grateful I didn’t go deep enough,” he whispered once the silence stretched uncomfortably. “You found me.”

For what was probably not the last time today, your eyes stung again. And yet, you opted to lift the spirits of him and yourself with a joke. It was the first thing that came to mind. “Well, you do seem to fail at slitting throats, Rick.”

You grinned up at him when he scoffed; giggled when he started to chuckle himself. The pair of you sounded as exhausted as you both looked, and when the laughter died out, you absorbed each other again. His presence was so consoling to your brain that had successfully convinced itself he was still gone, that after a length of time you realized you’d fall back asleep soon. And Rick would probably ensure you didn’t wake up alone again.

You hadn’t gotten a chance to do something, though.

Propping yourself up on your right elbow, you blinked sleep out of your heavy eyes while pulling weakly at his new arm attachment; more as a question rather than an unpermitted attempt to uncover it. “Can… can I look?”

Unease cast a shadow over his blue eyes, despite the trust in them, and he nodded. Which you’d only half expected him to do. You’d braced yourself for a no.

You would see it eventually, so he figured it was best to do it now and get it out of the way rather than prolong it.

Sitting your pillow off to lean it against the headboard, Rick adjusted and repositioned to lay on his back instead, which gave you a better opportunity to look at his hand. It was strapped on in two different places; one at the elbow, and one at the shoulder. The fingers were hyper-realistic, yet closed into a fist with no opening for a weapon to be gripped. It was almost as if he could read your mind, because Rick drew his arm away from you to demonstrate the release of a blade triggered in the wrist.

You lifted a finger to trail it along the sharp edge of the custom weaponized extension and hissed through grit teeth when it left a thin, shallow cut on your fingertip.

“I’m not getting the med kit back out.” He finished saying it with a playfully chastising call of your name.

No need to bother. You sucked the blood from the pad of your finger and threw him a drowsy smirk. “This is hot.”

That definitely caught him off guard.

“Yeah?” Rick shook his head with a dampened smile. “Well, I’m glad you see my suffering as an upgrade.”

The greatest salve for your pain was his lips on yours. Maybe it would do the same for his wounded pride.

Quite the valid reason to try it.

“Shut up.”

Your smile met his, and they stayed there even after you fell asleep again. This time, dreaming of the future.

National suicide and crisis hotline: call or text 988

Help with self harm: text CONNECT to 741741

LGBTQ+ inclusive resource: https://www.thetrevorproject.org/resources/article/support-for-self-harm-recovery/

Numbers for different parts of the world: https://blog.opencounseling.com/suicide-hotlines/

[despairots]

fight or flight , dylan lenivy.

you don’t actually believe you too are just friends who relate to eachother, right? wrong, you’re just friends, nothing more.

cw: angst, reader doesn’t know who he is, reader is a male, reader is self-awared, reader is [sexuality], reader bottles up their emotion, reader is a good actor, unrequited love (or is it?)

pairing: dylan lenivy x male!reader.

song to listen to … fight or flight by conan gray.

man, you hated this part; where everything you worked for was for nothing. you’re genuinely selfish for thinking you could have him as a friend, let alone a lover.

how could you ever think you could have a chance with him? you two were better off as bestfriends. i mean, it was so easily shown that dylan was into ryan, the glances to him and the constant flirting.

“this is activating my fight or flight.” you muttered to kaitlyn as your heart tugged, watching dylan willing kiss ryan, kaitlyn watched as you fiddled with your ring.

‘don’t cry, don’t cry.’ you sucked it up as you felt an empty feeling in your stomach as everyone oohed and clapped. you faked a smile as dylan sat back down, feeling all giddy.

“ew, affection.” you gagged as dylan jokingly rolled his eyes before nudging you, you felt yourself grow all giggle from the small touch; like igniting a fire.

“okay, [name] - truth or dare.” ryan asked you as you sat there wide eyed, “okaaaay, anything you ask me better not be some freaky, weird shit. truth.” you scoffed, “boo, you pussy.” “hardy har har.” you rolled your eyes at kaitlyn.

“do you have a crush on anybody?” he asked as everyone oohed at such a basic truth question, “mmm, absolutely not, nice try though.” you took a sip from your drink.

“i call bullshit!”

jacob called out as you glared at him, “ooh, you kiss your mom with that mouth?” you crossed your legs as kaitlyn chuckled. “oh come on, you HAVE to have a crush.” kaitlyn insisted.

“i used, used, to have a crush on someone.” ‘and it’s someone here.’ you lied as you empathized the used, “gasp, you’ve never told me this?” dylan dramatically gasped with a hand on his heart. you scoffed with smile.

“is it a boy?”

“very basic emma, next!” you joked before jacob said something, “i bet it’s dylan.” dylan snapped hsi head towards you as you furrowed your eyebrows, “wrong. he’s just my bestfriend, and plus why would i snatch ryan’s man? wow jacob.”

you faked as the more you lied, the more closed you are to breaking down and you do not want dylan to you like that.

dylan lightly got hurt from just-a-friend mention, “okaay, sure, whatever you say, [name].” jacob didn’t believe as you grew irritated.

the game went longer before you felt sick to your stomach, “i’ll be back.” you placed your drink down before leaving, “hey- [name] it’s dangerous out there, you know that, right?” nick shouted for but you waved it off.

before you knew it, you were down at the dock trying to hold back the tears that threatened to come out, “fuck. stop crying, stop crying, stop crying.” why’d you have to fall in love?

love… such beautiful word yet a word that can bring somethings to destruction.

you heard heavy breathing and footsteps behind making you wipe your eyes quickly and taking a big deep breath before you saw a familiar figure sit down beside.

“hi, jacob.”

“hi.” you noticed the way his mouth quivered and his eyes watering, “are you okay? what happened?” you asked as you placed a comforting a hand on his shoulder.

“when i thought emma still had feelings for me, she went a full on french kissed nick, abigail ran off and so did i.” jacob explained as you pitied him.

“jacob, i’m so sorry.” “no, no, it’s fine. i shouldn’t have chased her.” he shaked off.

“i wish i could accept something like that easily.” jacob furrowed his eyebrows, “easily?” “yeah.” you sniffled as jacob noticed the way you bite your lips and eyes fluttering with water.

“[name]? you’re crying…”

“yeah- yeah, i know.” you didn’t bother jacob seeing you about to breakdown, you wanted someone, just someone, to know who you really are but that’s the thing, you don’t know who you are.

“what’s wrong?” you sadly smiled, “can’t tell you that.” you whispered as you continued to sniffle, “come here.” he opened his arms as you scooted closer to jacob, accepting his hug.

and as soon he wrapped his arms around you, you broke down.

[harleykeener69]

You can’t save everyone

Sometimes you just can’t

Too far gone.

Or they weren’t even there in the first place.

Save is a funny word. What do they need saving from?

Themselves?

I wonder. How the fuck I ended up here

Having to be stopped from hurting my own body, my own self. Me!

But sometimes I’ll stand in front of a mirror poking pinching pulling glaring at myself watching those dead eyes stare back and I feel physically revolted.

I itch. Under my skin

It has to be let out

I itch.

I hear your words, your voice I can’t escape, why can’t I escape?

I’m away from you know and yet I still can hear your fucking voice.

Screaming crying yelling and I gasp

I hit my head to shut you up.

How are you in my head?

How are you in there?

And so many of you’s

Sometimes you can’t save people, But these people needed to not be broken in the first place.

Burnt battered and torn. You drag me through thorns rip out my hair mouth open and you assault me with words.

You slice.

Slice with your eyes. 

I’m scared, the child in my head whispers. I know. I whisper back

That child is me.

Stuck forever being an 8 year old scared to be hit by their parents.

Why can’t you leave me alone?? 

Why are you staying?

Why does it hurt so bad. So bad.

It’s like your fingernails dig into my flesh wet sopping and torn, you pull through my skin fingers erupting from the middle of my chest and blood sprays dribbles and leaves my body as I go cold. You hold my heart in your hands, tainted its still beating, the last bits of blood dribbling down you arms and I slump forward.

And you squeeze destroying every last bit of me until I’m nothing but bits of obliterated meat and flesh. Grime and grit.

I’m dead. You killed me.

You aren’t even aware that you have, But my blood, my flesh, my tears have drenched you. You aren’t aware still. Even as you clean away my blood, my body, me not there.

I’m done. You broke me. You broke my insides, so that they physically changed. I will never be the same. You changed my chemistry. And yet you still wash away my blood like it’s nothing, Down the drain another normal Saturday.

You talk to me like you didn’t murder me.

And I don’t understand how you can’t see me crying screaming hurting.

You broke me. 

Some people just needed saving, and you did the opposite. 

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

Yuu can do it!

Part 22

First<Previous>Next

Masterlist

The brand new side-shenanigans fic has come out so I'm going to plug it HERE

Enma wasn’t sure what he was expecting when he went to go pick up Kuroki and Grim from their class on yagujen, but it certainly wasn’t to find Ito with them.

He raised an eyebrow. “Weren’t you supposed to be in…” He trailed off, his eyebrows furrowing as he struggled to remember what their schedule was.

“Religion. And, yeah, I left. Professor Frollo’s vibes were off,” they said, their nose scrunching.

Kuroki mouthed that Enma shouldn’t ask and, for once, Enma decided that maybe there were questions he didn’t need the answers to.

“Can you transfer out?” He asked instead.

They shrugged. “Doubt it. Those contracts we signed seemed binding. But I saw – uh – B…B… letras… Vanrouge-senpai before I left, so I’ll just get the assignments from him.”

Enma nodded. There had been an empty seat next to him in his art class and the teacher hadn’t seemed concerned nor surprised, so it probably wasn’t a big deal to skip here.

But… he fought off the smirk threatening to play across his features as a terrible realization came to him. Enma sniffed and pretended to wipe a tear from his eye. “Wait, you could go anywhere and you went to hang out with him?”

“I’m Ito’s favorite,” Kuroki caught on quickly, grinning.

“You’re Ito’s favorite,” Enma nodded along.

Ito rolled their eyes. “It’s ‘cause, out of the two of you, I trust Enma to not get his ass kicked on the first day a lot more.”

Kuroki sputtered. “Hey! That’s only because of Grim!”

“And you’re the one that wanted him,” Ito reminded him, reaching over to poke his nose.

Grim gave them a look that would be more fitting if they had killed his child right in front of them. Since they did not, as far as Enma was aware, he thought the monster might be overreacting a little. “Everyone wants me.”

Ito hummed and patted the monster on the top of the head. “Very true. My mistake, Grim-sama.”

Grim nodded, easily placated.

Now this just wouldn’t do. Enma sniffed. “You don’t have to make excuses, Ito. Just say Kuorki is the favorite. I won’t hold it against you, promise.”

Ito groaned. “I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I can’t wait to go to work for Crowley. Fuck you guys.”

Kuroki gave them a disgusted look. “I’d rather not.”

Ito gave him a tiny shove. “I hate you both. Don’t do anything stupid while I’m gone.”

“No promises,” Grim said. At least he was self-aware.

“Yeah, I figured that was too much to hope for.”

~

“There really are chestnuts all over the place!” Grim said.

Which, thank you for stating the obvious, Grim. Enma hadn’t noticed. Honestly, you’d think they were playing a visual novel where the graphic designers hadn’t had enough budget to create another background. They could see the chestnut trees.

(Which, as far as he could tell, were perfectly normal. The chestnuts didn’t even seem to be larger than normal. Sad.)

Deuce grinned, pushing himself up from where he and Ace had been waiting under a tree. He held out a hand to help Ace up as well, but Ace ignored it.

“Took you guys long enough,” Ace teased. “Weren’t your guys’ classes closer than ours?”

Kuroki shrugged. “We were tormenting Ito.”

Deuce and Ace nodded sagely. Enma and Kuroki nodded back. An understanding had been met.

But, sadly, this couldn’t go on forever; Enma had work soon, so he reminded them all that they needed to get a move on at some point.

“So, 250, right? So divided by the five of us, that’s… 50 each, right?”

“Yeah,” Ace said. And then his eyes strayed to Grim and he grimaced. “Er… actually… it’ll probably be closer to 60 each, if we’re gonna be honest with ourselves.”

“The more the better! If we get enough, maybe we can have all-you-can-eat chestnut tarts! Let’s get to picking!” Grim launched himself from his usual spot and curled around Kuroki’s shoulders

“Wait,” Enma said, pulling a branch down to inspect it closer.

Kuroki’s hand shot out just in time to snag Grim by the tail. The monster squeaked and bounced back towards him like a rubber band. The four humans tuned out their friend’s complaints with practiced ease.

“They have thorns,” Enma pointed out.

Deuce frowned, leaning closer. “Didn’t know chestnuts had those… we should probably get some gloves. I don’t think we can pick those up with our bare hands.”

“You can do it if you’re not a coward,” Kuroki said. He pulled one from the branch, and Enma watched as his friend experienced all of the stages of grief in real time. Tiny beads of blood spilled between his fingers. “... I have made a severe and continuous lapse in my judgment.”

~

Deuce and Kuroki had to go find a first aid kit, so that left Ace, Enma, and Grim to search the botanical gardens for a tool shed – or, at the very least, a caretaker.

And then they split up. A terrible thing to do when your life is ruled by no Laws other than Murphy’s.

‘It’s just a few minutes’, Enma had thought. ‘I have Grim with me so he will not be able to cause any trouble. And Ace is sometimes competent on his own. What can happen in five minutes?’

He can step on a tail. That’s what can happen.

In his defense, the area around him was gorgeous. Colorful, magical, plants surrounded him on all sides, even hanging from the ceiling. Signs with glowing script poked out from between the leaves, telling him what they were all called and what their magical properties were, and he couldn’t help glancing over every single one. How could he not get distracted? This place was practically heaven for the nerdy part of him that wanted to know everything there was to know about the new world he was in.

And, so, he stepped on what one would assume was a vine in a place like this, and jolted back in horror, thinking he had trodden on one of the plants that had so effortlessly caught his attention… and found a tail. It pulled itself away from him, slinking into a nearby bush, and Enma frowned as he started to follow after it.

A disgruntled face popped out of the bush. Their hair was a bit messy, what one would call a literal bedhead, and there was a few pieces of grass stuck to one of the man’s tan cheeks.

“Sorry,” Enma said, backing up so the man could leave his bush prison.

He did so with what was either a practiced ease or an uncaring attitude. Assumedly the first one, as the man brushed away the leaves sticking to his school uniform without even sparing them a glance.

“What are you doing in my garden?” The man asked, fixing Enma with a glower.

Enma smiled despite it. “Oh! You’re the caretaker, then? Could you help me find something?”

“He seems kinda young for that,” Grim pointed out.

“I mean, he’s older than any of the other students we’ve seen so far,” Enma reasoned. “And he could be an apprentice or something, not the caretaker, I suppose.”

The man ignored them, pulling his tail upwards to inspect it. “And stepped on my fucking tail, too…”

“And he’s more vulgar than you’d expect from someone on the school staff,” Grim added.

Enma conceded on that point.

“And I was in the middle of such a good nap. This sucks,” the maybe-not-a-caretaker continued to complain to no one.

Oh. Wait.

Enma dipped forward in apology. “I’m really sorry about that, I should have been paying more attention.”

The man’s nose twitched as Enma got closer, and he raised his eyebrows at him. “Aren’t you the herbivore from the ceremony? One of the ones that doesn’t have any magic?” He leaned closer, and Enma realized he was being sniffed. He went stock-still, unsure what to do in this kind of situation. Was this something that all yajugen do? Is it a cultural greeting? Would it be wrong to stop him? And, really, Enma had stepped on his tail, so maybe he could let the weirdness slide…? “Why do you smell like…?” The man trailed off, confused.

“I showered this morning,” Enma said, more self-conscious than he had ever been before.

“Earth,” the man decided. “That’s what you smell like. Earth.”

Enma reeled back, no longer concerned about the potential social ramifications as he looked at the man with wide eyes. “Holy – you know what Earth is?”

The stranger looked just as confused by his reaction as Enma was by the entire interaction they were having. He nodded slowly and pointed downwards.

“We’re on… Earth?” Enma said slowly, confused.

“Yeah…?” the man said, looking at him like he was stupid.

But he wasn’t, was he? The mirror had said that Earth didn’t exist in this world, it was a whole thing, kinda the whole reason they were still in this world –.

And then it clicked.

“Oh, you mean ‘earth’ as in dirt,” he said, groaning internally because he had never felt quite so stupid before.

“Yeah? What the fuck did you think I was saying?”

“Wait, you think I smell like dirt?” He ignored him in favor of sniffing himself aggressively, but he couldn’t detect any of the supposed ‘dirt’ smell. Was it so entrenched in him that he couldn’t smell it? How would he get rid of it then? And where did it even come from? When did it start? Why did no one tell him? This interaction was making his self-esteem plummet. He was about to meet Kuroki down there.

Grim bristled on Leona’s shoulders, his fur standing on end. “Hey! No one is allowed to be mean to any of my Henchmen except for me! Who do you think you are to judge us, anyways? What, are you king or something?”

The man’s mild confusion wiped itself off of his face, and the yagujen bared his teeth at them. A low growling sound began to rumble in his throat. “Alright, you know what? You insolent whelps better prepare yourselves to lose a tooth –.”

Enma jerked back to himself, holding his hands up in a way that he hoped looked placating, but he was really just preparing himself to get into a defensive position. “Wait! What? Nonono, I’m sorry about your nap and your tail and – uh – whatever Grim said to upset you, but I’m sure there’s a better way to go about this?”

The man cocked his fist.

“Leona-saaaaaan!”

‘Leona’ flinched in surprise. The lion ears atop the man’s head flicked and he turned just in time to see another person rush into their part of the greenhouse.

This one was far shorter, but also a yagujen. Enma wasn’t sure what animal, exactly, he had traits of, but it was something furry. Besides that, though, the boy wasn’t the type that would get a second glance. Dirty blond hair and sharp blue eyes were hardly surprising in a world where approximately 1 in 5 people had white hair. His clothes were too large on him, too, which didn’t help him stand out.

The blond raced over, far faster than Enma had thought possible. Was it because he was a yagujen or a unique magic or something else? “So this is where you’ve been hiding out,” he said, shaking his head. “You’ve got remedial classes, y’know.”

“I know.”

The new stranger stared for a moment, expectant, before seeming to realize that he shouldn’t have held his breath. “You need to go to your classes.”

“You need to stop annoying me.”

“It’s ‘cause you keep failing that I gotta keep bothering you, y’know,” he said. “If you fail another year we’re gonna end up being classmates.”

“Lay off, Ruggie,” said Leona. “Why can’t you annoying people just leave so I can nap?”

“If you think… er… Ruggie-senpai is annoying now, then you might want to graduate before he ends up being classmates with you. Then you’ll never escape,” Enma pointed out.

Leona looked horrified at the very prospect. Ruggie, in turn, didn’t seem to know whether to be offended or relieved, which was fair.

Ruggie settled for neither. He just adapted to the new situation, grabbing a stunned Leona’s arm and starting to drag him out of the garden. “C’mon. It’s not like you’re stupid, you’d pass if you just tried. Let’s go.”

Leona clicked his tongue and jerked his arm out of Ruggie’s grasp, but followed along resignedly regardless. He shot one last glare Enma’s way, and Enma wasn’t completely sure which of the long series of events Leona was currently mad at him about.

But whatever. It probably wouldn’t matter, anyways. What were the chances they would see each other again? They weren’t even in the same year.

So, he sighed to himself and turned to go back

Grim frowned as he settled back down on Enma’s shoulder, his furry face tucked close to his neck. “Man, that caretaker was awful, we should file a complaint.”

Enma laughed so hard that Grim almost fell off.

~

Picking chestnuts sucked, regardless of their gloves. Not because it hurt, the gloves that Ace had found were so perfect that Enma was pretty sure they had to be enchanted in some way…

No, it was awful because Kuroki spent the entire time complaining about his hand despite the fact that it hadn’t taken all that long for it to stop bleeding, and Grim gave up once he reached the expected 10 chestnuts and curled up in the shade of a tree, and Deuce and Ace argued about whether or not Deuce was secretly a delinquent (Enma was willing to bet good money that he was, but when asked to settle the tie he had decided remaining neutral was probably the best for his health, something he came to regret when the argument did not finish), and Grim had gone on a rant about how terrible their experience with the caretaker was, and then all of them had had to explain the dorms again because Grim called Savanaclaw ‘The Banana Dorm’ of all things...

Needless to say, Enma was glad when he realized that it was about time for him to start heading to work. He pulled the last few down hastily and tossed them in the general direction of the basket before tearing off his gloves and making a break for it.

~

Ah, work. Everyone’s least favorite responsibility, outside of all of their other responsibilities. Enma was regretting running there. Especially since he hadn’t forgotten the way he had reacted to the shop the first time he had approached it. The way it felt like his skeleton was about to rattle its way right out from under its skin and try to make a break for it. He wasn’t eager to have a repeat of that, and he was even less eager to do so when he didn’t have his emotional support idiots hanging off of him.

But, surprisingly, as he made his way closer and closer, his feet picking their way along the stone paths covered in knickknacks he couldn’t make heads or tails of (and some things he thought might actually be heads and tails)... he couldn’t seem to find that weird feeling from before. Maybe it was a fluke? Or maybe he was just allergic to shady people and having both Dire Crowley and Azul Ashengrotto in the same place had given him a very adverse reaction.

Haha, funny, but also what the heck?

He brought his thumb up to his mouth to bite it, considering everything. This world was interesting, and he wanted to know more, but there was something eating away at him. Something was wrong.

The door swung open before Enma could open it, and he jolted into awareness.

“How’d you know…?”

“I have friends on the other side that tell me everything I need to know, little ghoul!” Sam said, smiling at him.

Enma continued to stare.

“There’s a window.”

Oh. Enma glanced over at the tinted glass windows. He had noticed them earlier but had forgotten about them because he was busy being vaguely unsettled by the lack of unsettling feelings.

A flush crept up his cheeks, but Sam didn’t give him all that long to dwell on it. He looped an arm over Enma’s shoulders and led him inside.

“Now, since it’s your first day, and because I’m sure that that Crow didn’t give you much, I’m going to make things easier for you.” Magenta eyes flashed. “So, I will be allowing you to shop around today – all on my dime, of course – and familiarize yourself with the placement of all of the items.”

Enma’s eyes widened. He looked up at Sam with stars in his eyes. “Really?”

“Yup. Go ahead. You have until the store opens in half an hour to look around.”

He ruffled Enma’s hair with a smile.

His smile lessened somewhat when he realized that Enma had been quietly making mental notes to himself the entire time he’d been in the magical world and, in fact, had a very detailed list of things they needed already thought up. Tinted shower curtains, blankets and pillows that hadn’t been eaten by moths, enough tuna to feed Grim and enough Coke to tide over Ito, cooking supplies, a couple of outfits for different occasions, every nonperishable food he could think of, and actually decent soaps… yeah, no, it was very clear that Sam hadn’t expected the bill to be quite as large as it was, but he learned one very crucial lesson that day: never underestimate Enma Yuuken.

“Well…” Sam said, staring at the pile of items so large that were almost falling off the counter, his eyes crinkled at the corners in something that was either pain or pride or a mix of both. “At least I know you’ll be able to handle being a customer service worker.”

[dyrewrites]

Pale Blood - real long snip and some self-indulgent tenderness

“Is this a prank, Min-min, are you pranking your poor old brother?” Den had already asked every other variation of the question, but he kept getting the wrong answers.

“I’m tellin’ true!” The soft voice on the other end of his netlink cried, again, continuing to give the wrong answers.

Den didn’t believe it, didn’t believe her. His sister pulled pranks, on everyone in the pack, but especially him–he had been her favorite, and he knew that, but he didn’t understand how favorite translated to ‘target’.

“Mama would never do something that stupid,” He assured her, as he had been assuring her, for the last twenty minutes. The eyes in the lab, all focused on him, were not helping the irritation and it bubbled into his voice. “Do you have any idea how much work that would take, or the trouble it would cause?”

He didn’t tell her that he knew, first-hand, what it would take–Ron got into the security system, had shown them the logs, the keys used–nor did he tell her that he stood in the very bloodbank she claimed their mother robbed. No, he pacified his sister’s anxieties; he assured her that what she suggested had been impossible–even as he grappled with the inevitability of it.

“Mama is throwin’ a party,” Minara hissed into the link. “And she invited everyone, Mori. They’re all comin’.”

A family reunion meant chaos, bloodshed and body counts.

Den sighed, “Okay, okay, tell it to me again. All of it.”

Delmas heard the growl from clear across the room, but it wasn’t Den’s. The growl that vibrated the air sang higher and when it hit, it hit hard. Ron caught his arm but it took Odea on his other to keep him steady and Den winced at him. Then the growl stopped and he glared at the floor with his hand hovering over his ear.

Minara spoke, clear and slow, her own irritation dripping off every syllable, “Nash come home with boxes, lotsa boxes, with cute lil’ bats on ‘em. Then he and mama cleared all the little hearts out the big fridge and put all them bat boxes in their places. Now mama got me gettin’ out the good hearts for comp’ny, she says everyone comin’. Auntie Ala too, and that’s bad, ain’t it? So’s I call you, since you the only one not ‘fraid of mama.”

Den didn’t answer, not yet; his thoughts were too loud, Night’s tits, ma, what crawled up your ass to welcome oblivion so openly…

“Did…did I do good?” Minara asked, with her little voice near a whimper. “I’s just scared, Mori. Ever’thin' is so loud and smelly here and you always know wh-”

“Yeah, Min,” Den cut in, aware that her whimpering led to rambling, which led to blubbering and without him there to play middleman it would end in a beating if their mother heard. “You did good, you did good. Sorry I was mean.”

The sigh on the other side of the link carried a whine but Minara kept quiet.

“Is, is Nash still there?” It was a long-shot, but Den knew that if his younger brother thought their sister were in any danger he would step in. And if he could do nothing else from where he stood, he could at least secure her some backup.

“I-I don’t know…I’ll go ch-”

The line crackled, screeching feedback into Den’s ear and Minara’s voice warbled with heavy footsteps falling behind it.

“No mama,” his sister begged, “I wasn’t slackin’, got the hearts right h-”

Den heard the slap; the entire room heard the slap. It popped out of his netlink and shattered the quiet as it echoed through the cavernous lab.

“Min!” Den shrieked, with frantic taps to his netlink, “No, no, no, pick up, pick up. Fuck! What happened?”

When the line died, with another harsh pop, Den knew what happened. And he stood, staring at the linoleum at his feet, as his eyes jittered and burned with budding tears. Familiar arms gripped Den’s shoulders and drew his face towards the warm chest that bore them. Delmas held him there, safe and tight.

“You need to go?” Del asked, his voice calm, its timbre soothing and Den fought harder against the tears.

The bittersweet scent that chased that voice told him Del knew the answer but Den didn��t want to leave that scent, or the eyes he sought when he looked up. But he had to.

He had to and the tears fell as he mumbled, “don’t wanna.”

Del slouched enough to lay his forehead on Den’s, where he kept it as their eyes closed and their breaths steadied to a shared rhythm.

“I’m…not so good at this,” Delmas whispered, urging his voice to remain in the space between them, where only Den could hear it. “But I like you.”

“I know,” Den whispered back. “You said-”

Delmas squeezed, hugging him tighter, “can I finish?”

Rubbing his forehead into Delmas’, Den held his tongue.

Afraid to lose the nerve if he didn’t, Delmas rushed the words, “I like you, and all of this got real serious, real fast, and I just don’t want to lose you before I know what we have. So, if things go sideways out there and you’re in trouble…”

“I’ll call you,” Den promised.

“And I’ll come runnin’,” Delmas returned.

They held the silence afterwards. They held it close and careful, savoring the words not spoken. Then Delmas pulled away, smoothed the stray hairs from Den’s face, held that face in his hands and fell into what he hoped wouldn’t be their last kiss.

There were gasps behind them, and grumbling, but it wasn’t directed at them. Ron and Odea had long looked away, preserving their intimate moment by busying themselves with scopes and slides. Neither noticed the kiss, or the whispers that came before it. They didn’t even notice the massive black wolf that bounded out of the room.

Ron kept his eyes locked on Odea until KB’s frightened claws dug into his legs. He moved too slowly to prevent the cat from nesting on his shoulder, but fast enough to catch sight of the tip of Den’s tail.

“Oh, did he…did he leave?” Ron asked Delmas, who stood at the door.

Delmas nodded but didn’t move.

Odea muttered something Ron couldn’t hear–and wouldn’t have understood if he could–before she switched slides and clicked her tongue.

“This isn’t right,” she told herself. “You’re not right,” she told the blood on the slide, and spun in her chair to tell everyone, “None of this is right!” Then she saw Delmas, looked around the room and then to Ron. He pursed his lips and shook his head and Odea bit her lip and returned to her slides. “It can wait.”

But something else couldn’t.

Delmas’ netlink flashed, it did not ring, it flashed–in a green so bright and brilliant it nearly blinded his right eye–and he ignored it. It flashed again, accompanied by a single, shrill beep and he huffed and tapped it.

“The fuck do you want?” he asked, in a voice too gruff, too loud.

“Oh, I’m sorry Mr. Grumpy, sir,” said a squeaky voice, pitched dramatically higher. “I must have the wrong ID. Ya see, I was looking for a sorry sack of meat and teeth that’s so fucking useless he had to call in favors from ones that’d rather see him ashed. D’you know anyone like that, Mr. Grumpy, sir?”

Delmas groaned.

The voice in his ear went on, “Are you sure you don’t know no one like that, Mr. Grumpy? These ones what that fuckwit called have got mightybig fists and a right absence a patience. Be a real shame if they didn’t find who they was lookin’ for.”

Delmas sucked his teeth, refusing to answer.

“I got Grin with me, you fangless dick, and I will send her in there after you,” the squeak had all but vanished as the voice hit a deeper, sharper octave.

“Good to hear from you, Neph,” Delmas said to the more familiar voice in his ear.

It screamed, low and guttural, before speaking again, “I hate you.”

“And if it had been a better day, I would try to change that, but the day’s been shit so…I’m comin’ up. See ya soon.” Delmas tapped the link off–in time to miss a slew of growled curses–and turned to Ron, “the backups are here.”

Ron nodded, not turning from the device Odea glared into, “I’ll unlock the doors and be…right there.”

“Uh-huh, meet ya up there,” No life breathed through Delmas’ voice, and no color lit his eyes–though they shined, wet and red-tinged–as he turned and shuffled from the lab.

Ron would have run after if he’d noticed, would have held him, offered comfort and assurances…but he didn’t notice. Odea found the drawing equipment and, before Ron could say a thing against it, she had a vial of her own blood in a slide. He grabbed her shoulders, tried to steady the shakes that had overtaken them, but she shook harder.

“Not right,” she muttered, switching the slides again and again as the color drained from her cheeks. “None of this is right!”

---

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