#does she not think she can beat Maeve now

[acourtofquestions]

And because he was the only person who saw everything she was and did not walk away from it, Aelin said, "I wanted that fire to be for Maeve."

"I know." Such simple words, and yet it meant everything-that understanding.

"I wanted it to make things ... better." She loosed a long breath. "To wipe it all away." Every memory and nightmare and lie.

"It will take a while, Aelin. To face it, work through it."

"I don't have a while." His jaw tensed. "That remains to be seen." She didn't bother arguing. Not as she admitted, "I want it to be over." He went wholly still, but granted her the space to think, to speak.

"I want it to be over and done with," she said hoarsely. "This war, the gods and the Wyrdgate and the Lock. All of it." She rubbed her temples, pushing past the weight, the lingering stain that no fire might cleanse. "I want to go to Terrasen to fight, and then I want it to be over."

She'd wanted it to be over since she'd learned the true cost of forging the Lock anew. — Had wanted it to be over with each of Cairn's lashes on the beach in Eyllwe. And all he'd done to her afterward. Whatever it might bring about, however it might end, she wanted it to be over.

She didn't know who and what it made her.

Rowan remained silent for a long moment before he said, "Then we will make sure the khagan's host goes north. Then we will return to Terrasen and crush Erawan's armies." He brought her hands to his mouth for a swift kiss. "And then, after all that, we'll see about this damned Lock." Uncompromising will filled his every breath, the air around them.

She let it be enough for both of them.

Tucked away his words, his vow, all those promises between them and extended her palm in the air between them.

[gucciwins]

Y/N just wants Harry to like her.

Word count: 5964

A/N: Friends!!!!! I am sorry to have disappeared but I am back. Yes, I am aware this is a Halloween/October story but you're getting it now mid November (that has been going by fast). I won't work on any holiday stories because I have no idea what to write. So if you have an idea and want me to write it feel free to shoot me an ask.

Now happy reading! I love you

+

Many people go to work ready to return home, but not Y/N. No, she walks in every day with a smile and a pep in her step. She greets her coworkers by name and occasionally brings baked goods she knows everyone will enjoy. Y/N loves her job, and she’s happy to go every day.

Y/N went from working in a job she hated because it was filled with men constantly belittling her and gaslighting her that she was doing her job wrong when she was actually excelling. It all got to be too much, and Y/N decided to quit. Thank goodness she did because soon into her job search, she received an email from Carla Crain asking her if she’d be interested in joining her company. Y/N went to the interview, and after basically being pitched her dream job, she accepted and entered as head engineer. 

She’d be lying if she wasn’t nervous starting, but the people Carla had hired all shared the same values on work and life. Y/N knew she’d be in safe hands. The company is small but slowly growing. It allows for every employee to get to know each other and everyone to remember that together, they can be successful. Y/N had been at the job for two years and, with time, brought new coworkers. 

There is Estrella, who loves to talk to you about astrology, ironically enough. She states that the invisible string theory is real and that if everyone tracked it, they would notice just how small the world is. 

Carmy has a tough exterior, but once anyone gets him talking, he never stops. He loves chatting about his family and his pet Pitbull named Daisy. 

Maeve is petite, and every other month comes in with a new color in their hair. Y/N enjoys it when everyone in the office places bets on what it will be. 

Tatum is from Scotland and loves to remind everyone when they all go out for drinks on the weekend. 

Chessy is the only one who works remotely, but when she comes in, she is always laughing in the office. They also all get a basket of fresh fruit and vegetables from her garden. 

Overall, Y/N knows she had the best coworkers and wouldn’t change her job for the world, but as their company grows, so does the need in their team. The newest hire is Harry Styles, who has come in as a computer technician to help develop their website and also help with any internal security. Honestly, all she knew was that it was a complex job. 

Harry was on the quiet side. She tried to start conversations with him, but he always seemed to brush her off. At first, Y/N wondered if she should take it personally but soon learned he did that to everyone. Even though he didn’t open up to them, they still invited Harry to join them. 

The thing was, he rejected all their dinners. Y/N loved going to a Korean BBQ Maeve introduced them to, and Harry claimed not to eat meat (not that she didn’t think it wasn’t true. Chessy was vegetarian, after all.) They would go to a bar and share a few drinks when they knew they would all be having a long weekend off. Harry always claimed he had an early morning. It didn't matter if they offered to meet earlier. Y/N’s favorite nights were trivia nights that happened at a local brewery. Y/N was a beat, especially in history. Harry declined, and this one hurt her the most.

 Everyone would ask Harry to join. 

Karaoke. Can’t hold a tune.

Bowling. Too loud. 

It seems there was an excuse for everything.

Everyone began to stop inviting him out, and while Y/N didn’t enjoy being told no, she would send notes to the office with the time and place of what they would be doing. She’d always keep an eye on the door, but Y/N went home disappointed each time.

The thing was, Y/N was determined to make a friend out of Harry. She soon learned large public settings must be overwhelming for him and decided to find a new way to approach him. Everyone took lunch at the same time in the office except for Harry. Sometimes, they all ate at the sub shop across the street. Most times, Y/N brought food from home, and she cooked. While she liked eating out, Y/N preferred a home-cooked meal. She caught Harry taking his lunch half an hour later than her and used that to her advantage. 

They had a conference that always remained empty as everyone preferred the main lounge. Harry went in there every day for his lunch hour. One day, Y/N walks in, smiles at him, and sits as far away as she can. She made sure to only be there for ten minutes. The next day, she stayed for twenty and wished him a nice lunch when she left.  

Slowly, Harry begins to spare her glances, but Y/N keeps to herself until the day she sits across from him. 

“Hi, Harry. Is it okay for me to sit here?” 

No answer. 

“I’m going to take that as a yes.” 

He fidgets with his fork. 

“I saw a lime bike out front. Did you ride that today?” 

Harry looks at her briefly before staring back at his plate. 

“I’ve always wanted to try one, but I’m honestly scared of being hit by a car. Chessy lets me ride hers when I go down to visit her. She’s got beautiful trails. You’d probably enjoy it.” 

Y/N thinks that’s enough for today and excuses herself. She doesn’t realize Harry noticed she didn’t take a bite of her lunch. When she goes back to her desk after using the restroom, she finds three chocolate chip cookies sitting on her desk. Y/N rushes to try one, doesn’t even think of who delivered them or that a green-eyed man was standing right outside waiting to hear her reaction. 

With time, it seems Harry is coming to appreciate Y/N’s presence. He has never expressed it, but she knows because he nods when he agrees to something she says or tightens the hold on his fork when Y/N shares something upsetting. Y/N had not gotten more than two words out of him. At this point, Y/N felt like Harry knew everything about her; all she knew was that he had the most beautiful eyes, and his hair always looked soft. 

One day, after many lunches together, she finds Harry reading a book. Y/N knows he might want quiet, but her curiosity gets the best of her. 

“Any good?”

Harry looks up and grimaces. “Think it’s really boring.” 

Y/N laughs because she wasn’t expecting that response. “Then put it down.” 

He shakes his head. “Don’t like not knowing the ending.”

Y/N shrugs, “if you don’t like a book, I wouldn’t put myself through the torture of it all. Skip to the end if you're curious.” She understands she spoke too much and excuses herself. 

The next day, Harry is sitting in his usual spot, but this time, a new book is in his hand. Y/N bites back a smile. 

“What’s this one about?”

“My sister recommended it,” he defends. 

Y/N isn’t halted by his harsh tone. “What’s it about?” 

“Well, it’s Pride and Prejudice.” He shows her the book cover. 

“Like the movie?” Y/N asks.

Harry laughs, and Y/N feels successful. His laughter rings in her ears. It’s a lovely sound, and she wishes to hear it more. “Yeah…I like the movie.” 

“Me too,” she gushes. “Do you think I’d like the book?”

He frowns, “if you like Jane Austen.” 

“Might have to pick it up next time I’m in the shops.”

+

Their interactions are solely during their lunches but sometimes spills out during work. Y/N seemed to have an issue with her computer and radioed IT. She needed to submit her document, but her desktop appeared to freeze whenever she opened a new file. Harry knocked on her door, and she welcomed him in. Y/N explained the issue, and Harry was quick to get to work. It was only a few minutes when she noticed that her document was open and her computer wasn’t having a meltdown.

“Thank you so much, Harry!” Y/N cheers, knowing he saved her. 

Harry shrugs because it’s his job. “You have a nice photo.” He’s pointing to her picture frame on her desk. It’s a picture of her and a dog in Iceland at the end of her hike. It was taken back when she was nineteen years old. 

“Thank you. I took that on my first solo trip.” She bites her lip, hoping Harry takes the bait. 

“Where to?” He asks curiously. 

She silently cheers, “Iceland.”

“Is that your dog?” 

“I actually found him mid-hike and took him back with me. I hoped to see his owner on the trail, but there was no luck. He didn’t even seem worried. Once I returned to the car park, his owner was there. After that hike, I decided I liked the company of a dog and returned home to adopt Tutter, a Jack Russel Terrier who loves to play fetch.”

“Why isn’t Tutter on your desk?” 

Y/N feels her face flush, “now, don’t be mean. I love my son, but that trip taught me I can do anything I set my mind to, whether alone or with company.”

Harry gives her the slightest smile. “I-I learned Italian because I always dreamed of having an Italian home.”

Y/N’s eyes brighten. Harry is opening up to her, and instead of pushing, she offers more of herself. “I’ve dreamed of visiting. The Amalfi coast is my dream to swim in. Silly, I know,” she brushes off, trying to downplay her excitement. 

Harry doesn’t let her. “You’ll make it.”

He finally excuses himself. Y/N is happy for the rest of the day because she realizes Harry is allowing her in.

+

September means the preparations for Halloween have begun. It starts with little things, from coasters and mugs to the occasional treat. One day, a tiny spider sits on his desk for a second. Harry believed it was real until it began to glow purple. Harry kept it on his desk next to his sticky notes. He doesn't do anything about it; there’s no need. By the second week, the office is entirely decorated. Harry admits a few decorations have scared him, especially the skeleton in the corner of the restroom.

It’s a quiet day when he’s walking by the break room on his way to the secluded office to have lunch when he hears people talking. Harry pauses because he hears Y/N’s voice mixed in with everyone else. 

“But it seems like he doesn’t like us,” Harry hears quietly. 

“It’s hard,” Y/N defends. “You’re all extroverts. It can be overwhelming.” 

Harry knows she’s trying for them to understand.

“But Carla is all about unity in the office. This is a concern.”

“It’s not, Carmy.” Y/N shuts him down, clearly upset she had to defend him.

Harry decides he’s heard enough and decides to eat lunch alone in his car. He’s thankful it was a sandwich and nothing he had to heat up. For the entire lunch and the rest of the day, all he thinks about are the words of his coworkers. 

Y/N looked for Harry, excited to talk about a book she started, but Harry was nowhere to be found. She wouldn’t have been concerned, but it’s clear no one saw him since before lunch. She wishes Harry could confide in her even if a fraction of what she shares with him/ 

The next day, everyone walks into the office at their usual time, everyone making their rounds together to the break room to prepare their coffees and store their lunch in the fridge. When Y/N walks in, she sees her coworkers huddled around the table and peeks around them to see what has captured their attention. There on the table is a box of Halloween cookies from a bakery uptown with a note attached. 

Enjoy - HS

Y/N lets a smile take over her face. She knew Harry cared about them but understood why he finally did something. She tells her coworkers they owe him an apology, and they all agree. Y/N makes sure to head to Harry’s office and thank him for the cookies. Harry tells her it’s nothing. She bounces away to her office, where Estrella, Carmy, Maeve, and Tatum are standing outside her door. 

“Can you come with us? Feel like he likes you.” Tatum tells her. 

Y/N sighs and tells them to follow her. Once again, she knocks on his door, and they all file in when he welcomes her in. Harry looks at them confused. 

“Uh, is there an issue?” Harry asks, concerned. 

Carmy starts, “we want to apologize if you overheard us yesterday.” 

“Right,” Harry sighs, knowing it might be a good time to share with them. If he trusted Y/N and she trusted them, he knew he could also start to. 

“It was wrong of us,” Maeve continues. “Y/N raves about how smart and nice you are, but we don’t get to see that. We’re sorry.” 

Everyone else repeats the sentiment while Harry looks at Y/N, who offers him an encouraging smile. She must know his anxiety is through the roof. 

Harry takes a deep breath, “right, uh.” He looks down at his shoes, untied lace on his black Adidas. “I struggle with social anxiety and new environments. It’s better than when I was a kid, but it’s easy to get overwhelmed even more when being the new guy.” 

“No worries. We get that,” Tatum expresses. “Estrella gets bad migraines.” 

“Don’t air other people’s personal stuff,” Y/N reminds them. 

“We’re sorry,” they offered one last time. “Thanks for the cookies.” 

After that, they hurried out while Y/N stayed behind. 

“I wanted to apologize,” he begins.

“You don’t–” Harry cuts her off. “You’ve made me feel comfortable.”

Y/N sighs, letting her shoulders drop. “Not enough, it seems.” 

“It can just be too much sometimes.”

“I-I get panic attacks.” Y/N shares, surprising herself. “When I overwhelm myself, it can happen. It’s uncommon and has not happened at work, but I understand.” 

“Thank you for sharing,” Harry tells her honestly. “Lunch?” 

“See you in a bit then.”

+

Through September, Y/N and Harry have lunch together every day. They read together, Harry more into classic literature, and Y/N loving to devour a juicy romance that has her pausing every few minutes, trying her best not to scream because the love interest brushed hands. Some days, Y/N will do a sudoku game while Harry does the daily crossword. Y/N likes to solve the Wordle of the day and most times asks Harry for help if she fears she might not get it. Some days, Y/N brings in her laptop during lunch because she is behind and needs to catch up. Harry reminds her to relax. He knows it’s easier said than done, so he tells her about the book he’s reading or asks about her dog and the snacks he eats. 

Before she knows if they’ve made it to October. One of the best months of the year. Y/N loves planning events, and this is one she wishes Harry would say yes to. She knocks on his office door, and Harry freezes, staring at his computer screen. He glances at the calendar; it's the first Monday of the month, and Harry knows they’ve planned a fun event. 

Harry is practicing his excuse when Y/N walks in with a bright smile, wearing a “Great Pumpkin” shirt with Snoopy and Charlie Brown. She has told him it’s her favorite movie to watch during the month and “The Conjuring” Harry wasn’t sure how the sweetest girl he knew could handle a horror film like that. He had told her she was fearless.

“Hi, Y/N, pretty shirt.” 

Y/N looks down at it as if she had forgotten what she was wearing. She beams at his compliment. “Thank you, Harry!” 

Harry asks how her day is going and shares how there was traffic on the way down and how she didn’t have time to stop by her favorite coffee shop because there was a line out the door. “Pumpkin spice isn’t even that good, H. I mean, it’s okay, but I wanted my coffee.”

He laughs at her pouting and promises to make her one during lunch. She perks up at his mention of their shared time together. 

“Speaking of our time together. We plan to go to a haunted pumpkin patch in the next town over if you want to join us. It’s two weeks from now, so it's the 21st.” Harry could hear the excitement in her voice and didn’t think he could say no to her.

“Everyone is going?”

“We invited everyone, but only Carmy, Estella, Maeve, Tatum, and myself are going. Carla was not for it. Dan is warming up to us but still says no. Though he did agree for trivia next week.”

Before he can stop himself, he says, “yes.”

“You will?” Y/N answers surprised. 

“Mhm…uh, it sounds like fun,” he says unconvincingly.

Y/N’s smile brightens, “I’m not hung on haunts, but they’ve got amazing apple cider you’ve got to try with me.” 

“Happy to join,” he tells her honestly. “Let me know the ticket cost or if we need to purchase our own.”

She nods eagerly. It’s clear Harry has just made her day. 

+

The day comes faster than he’s ready, and while a part of him is excited, Harry feels his nerves will get the best of him. Y/N had told them no one was dressing up in costume and even went as far as to send him a photo of her outfit to assure him she wasn’t playing a joke with him. She was wearing bell bottoms with a Mickey Mouse in a pumpkin shirt. She told him it was his favorite to wear each year. 

Harry knew it would be cold, so he wore a simple Halloween shirt in his closet and loose-fitting jeans. His jacket in his car he knew would keep him warm throughout the night. He wasn’t trying to impress anyone (only Y/N) but also wanted to look nice outside of the office for once. When Harry parked, Y/N told him she’d wait by the entrance for him, and he couldn’t miss her as she had a cute pumpkin headband on.

It seemed Y/N spotted him, too, because she rushed towards him. “Hi, Harry,” she greeted with a cheery smile.

“Hi, you look lovely,” he offered her a small compliment that made his hands sweat.

“You’re too sweet. Come on, we were waiting on you.” She grabs his hand and pulls him along to where everyone else is. 

Everyone offers their greeting, and he receives a few compliments on his tame outfit. It’s an old Halloween shirt he got at a vintage shop in New Orleans five years ago. His sister went on a trip and asked him to join. Harry could never say no to her. 

Harry notices everyone begins to drift off into conversations, but Y/N stays by his side. He takes the time to admire her as she looks around at all the decorations. There are a lot of people, but it seems they are heading to the pumpkin patch. There are stalls selling sweet treats, and he keeps in mind to buy Y/N a cider, remembering she mentioned loving it. Harry has always thought being in a relationship to be intimidating. He loves love but struggles to put himself out there, to allow someone else to get to know him, but here is Y/N, who managed to worm her way into his life, knocking down all of his walls. 

Harry likes Y/N.

It’s something he took a long time to figure out, but when he realized the excitement of seeing her each morning, he looked forward to it. He let it consume him, but he had no idea if she could feel the same way. 

“Did you drive here, Harry?” Y/N asks, breaking their silence. 

“I did,” he answers. 

“Do you think you could maybe take me home?” She brushes her hair out of her face. “I came with Tatum, but she’s been wanting to take the time to connect with Estella, if you know what I mean,” Y/N gestures to them kissing on hay bales. 

Harry had no idea that there were feelings between them. “I can do that, Y/N.” 

“Great!” She cheers gratefully. “I owe you an apple cider, then.” 

Y/N eagerly walks them to the stand, and before she can pay for both, Harry slips the kind older lady a twenty walking away with their drinks. Y/N stays behind, shocked, but quickly catches up, pouting at Harry. “Harry, I was going to pay.”

He shook his head, “my mum would have my head if I let you pay.”

Y/N bends her head, careful to take a sip of the warm drink. “Well, thank you.”

Maeve bounces over to them. “Hi beauties, we’re ready to start if you all are.” 

Harry eyes Y/N, waiting to see her response. Y/N offers her friend a large grin, and Harry agrees he’s ready. He throws away their ups, and once he finds Y/N with the group, he slithers to stand behind her. Y/N offers him a tense smile as the group tries to decide who will lead. 

“I can go in front,” Harry offers, sensing no one wanting to make the first move. Everyone thanks him and heads to the first maze. Y/N informs him it’s once based on the catacombs in France. 

“There’s a movie based on the catacombs,” Y/N shares as they walk together.

“As Above So Below,” Harry says. “It spooked me.” 

“You’ve seen it,” she laughs, holding onto his arm for a second, unable to contain her excitement. “It’s one of my favorites.”

“It’s a good one,” he agrees. 

They fall into silence as the chatter of their coworker fills the air. Harry sees Y/N get fidgety, but she’s smiling as she leads the way to the short line. “I’m actually really nervous,” she tells Harry. 

“We’ll be fine. I got you,” he assures Y/N.

Harry extends his hand, and she accepts it. He intertwines their fingers and pulls her along as the line moves slowly. Y/N does her best not to think about the feeling of his hand, but it fits perfectly between hers. She feels her hand begin to sweat and wants to pull it away, but Harry has a firm grip on her. 

“Is it okay?” Harry nods, gesturing to their hands. 

“Safe, uh, I feel safe.”

The worker asks how many, and Y/N peeks behind Harry to tell her six. Harry is grateful Y/N knows when to take charge because while he can lead a scary maze and knows everyone is dressed in costumes, he still feels nervous speaking to strangers. Harry squeezes her hand once in thanks. She gives him two quick squeezes in return.

Harry guides them in. Y/N lets go of his hand to hide behind Harry, her hands on his shoulder as she peeks behind him. There is a group ahead where she can hear the people in front screaming, which allows her to prepare for the scare, if that is even possible. 

Her eyes widen in amazement as she takes in the darkness of the building. Everything is covered in black cloth. She can see the spots where actors will jump out. Y/N mumbles an apology to Harry for holding on to him tight. Estella is behind her, screaming at everything that moves. Harry steps through the curtain, and she feels her hold on him loosen. As she is stepping closer to reach him, a man screams in her face, making her rush forward and propel Harry into a wall. 

“I’m sorry. I’m so so sorry.” Y/N apologized repeatedly as Harry rushed them to finish the maze. She felt her heartbeat in her throat and knew she needed to calm down. One look at Harry, and he rushed her to a dark corner, not concerned about their friends. 

“Y/N? I’m okay. You’re okay.” Harry tried assuring her.

She repeated it in her head. They were okay. They got out of the dumb maze, and Harry wasn’t hurt. It took her a few minutes to realize she had a panic attack. Y/N had not even felt it coming and didn’t think a haunted house would trip her into one, but with all the overthinking she had been doing, it made sense it led to this.

“I’m sorry, Harry.” Y/N bashfully looks away from him. She can’t believe she embarrassed herself in front of him like this. 

“No apologies,” he brushes her off and doesn’t ask her any questions, only to ensure she is okay. 

They rejoin the group after ten minutes by the looks of everyone's sympathetic smiles. She knows they saw her freak out, but they’re her friends. She knows she’s in safe hands with everyone, especially Harry.

“What’s the next maze?” Y/N asks cheerfully. 

And so they continue on. 

The next maze is much smoother than the first. Carmy leads, tucking Harry and Y/N in the middle with Tatum and Estella in the back. That order seems to comfort Y/N for the next few mazes. Each worker makes her scream but then falls into giggles when Harry traces comforting shapes on her hand. It takes her mind off these scarers trying to get her to scream and instead focus on the gentle touches of her crush. 

While doing the mazes is fun, Y/N is soaking up talking to Harry in line. They’re in a new environment where they do not need to discuss work. She feels free to ask him anything, but sometimes she is unsure where to start. Y/N doesn’t know if she wants to hear about his weekend plans or ask him about his favorite movie or who his favorite Muppet character is? 

Talking to Maeve and everyone else is easy because she’s gone out with them. She knows them personally, but with Harry, he always kept that guard up, and now she’s unsure what to do if he decides to keep it up. 

To her surprise, Harry always starts the conversation with her. Harry shares about a new show he started watching and how it makes him anxious for the main character when they do something out of character. When he asks Y/N if there is a show she recommends, her mind goes blank, and the first thing that comes to mind is “Fleabag.” 

“It’s the saddest but most comforting show I have ever seen,” Y/N gushes. 

“With Phoebe Waller-Bridge?” 

“Mhmm…the second season has Andrew Scott. Irish treasure.” 

“Paul Mescal,” he adds. 

“Hozier.” 

“Saoirse Ronan,” they say in unison before falling into fits of giggles. 

“You’ve got taste, Styles.” 

“As do you.” 

The line moves, and they change conversations to talk about the best musicals they’ve seen. Y/N swears “Waitress” is the best thing created, but Harry tells her “Moulin Rouge” is his favorite. Y/N loves how easily the conversation with Harry seems to flow. He feels like a long-lost friend. Someone who once was in her life has now found his way back to her. 

Not only is he getting along with her, but everyone is getting to see the Harry she had come to know. The one who makes cheesy jokes and loves to hear every detail of the story being told. It turns out he and Maeve frequent the same record store. There’s a Stevie Nicks vinyl Harry is on the hunt for, and Maeve promised to keep an eye out for him. Tatum learns Harry can play guitar and asks him to show them sometime. Something he agreed to with pink cheeks. Y/N knew tonight was a big step for Harry, and she was glad everyone made him feel comfortable.

As the night was coming to an end, the maze lines got shorter, and the more Y/N screamed. It made her laugh right after, but still not her favorite part of the night. Before the cold can settle in, they all call it a midnight night. Tatum and Estella head out hand in hand. Y/N can’t wait for the details of that on Monday. Carmy is telling Harry a story, so Maeve uses the opportunity to remind Y/N to make a move.

“It’s now or never, girlfriend.” 

Y/N rolls her eyes, “please don’t pressure me on this.” 

“Y/N that man is, head over heels for you. If I was antisocial this is not an event I would ever do. Unless someone I fancied asked.” 

Y/N toes her food in the sand and, in a low voice, asks, “do you really think he likes me?” 

Maeve smiles, brushing Y/N’s hair out of her eyes. “That man lit up every time your eyes were on him. I don’t know Harry as well as you do, but I can notice a guy with a crush from miles away. Trust me on this.” 

Y/N backs down, relaxing, “okay.” 

“Good. Now text me when you get home. Carmy’s got me.” Maeve gives her a tight hug and then pulls Carmy away from Harry. 

He walks over to her with a shy smile on his face. “Have a good time?” 

“The best,” she tells him. “Though I might need another apple cider. Think my heart needs it.”

“By all means, lead the way.” 

After getting one last warm apple cider, they reach Harry’s car. It’s an electric car because he’s conscious of his environmental impact and knows one person can go a long way into the future. Harry opens Y/N’s car door and waits until he sees her seated and buckled to close her door. As he gets ready to drive off, he turns on the heater, knowing if he’s cold, Y/N must be too. 

The car ride starts off quietly, Y/N guiding him every so often when to make a turn. Y/N sees her favorite coffee shop and knows she is almost home. “That was fun,” Harry starts. “I’m happy I went.” 

“Mhmm…it was a good time. Glad you joined us,” she tells him honestly. 

Harry notices at a red light that she’s fidgeting with her hands and thinks he might still be cold. “Do you need me to turn up the heater?” 

Y/N shakes her head, “no, sorry, I’m fine.” 

Harry drives down a few more streets when Y/N tells him to turn left. “It’s the third one on the right.” 

He parks right outside her driveway. From here, he can see her decorations hung up. It’s decorated charmingly. It’s clear no scaring would happen here. She’s got two pumpkins outside her door. One has stars carved all around; the other is a cat on a witch’s broom. Bat lights are hanging up the railing of the steps. She even has a few inflatables. His favorite has to be the one of Mickey Mouse as a vampire.

“Thank you for driving me home. I appreciated it.” She smiles at him, and he returns it. Harry gets out of the car and opens her door. 

“Let me walk you up.” 

Y/N feels her cheeks burn and leads the way. 

“We’re planning trivia soon,” Y/N says, testing the waters. 

“Hmm…only if you’re on my team.” 

“We would all be on the same team,” his flirting going over her head.

Harry’s face turns pink, “uh, right.” 

She laughs, placing her hand on his bicep. “Only joking.”

Y/N pulls him in, whispering good night, except when she pulls away, she locks eyes with his emerald eyes, and it’s like she’s in a trance. She feels herself leaning in closer, and before she knows it, Y/N presses her lips to Harry in an airy kiss.

She pulls back, shocked. “Sorry,” she breathed out. “I-I should have asked.” 

“Ask me,” he pleads. 

“What?” Y/N isn’t sure if she heard him correctly. 

Harry doesn’t care anymore. He raises his hand to rest on her cheeks. “Can I kiss you, Y/N?” 

She feels how close he is. She can feel his breath mixing with hers. “Yes.” 

When their lips meet, Y/N swears she feels time stop. Harry is starting slow as he begins to learn what she likes.  Y/N places a hand on his chest, needing to have a secure hold as she feels him take her breath away. Her emotions are all over the place. His lips are smooth as they move against hers in a dance that feels like they’ve done a hundred times before. Harry deepens the kiss, pushing her up against the door, making Y/N grab a fistful of his shirt, not wanting him to pull away. Y/N lets herself get wrapped up in all her feelings because she knows that a kiss this special means it won’t be her only one, and she finally allows all her feelings to pour into the kiss. 

Y/N isn’t sure how long they spent kissing outside her door. It seems she’s lost track of time since she got a taste of Harry. “I don’t want you to go,” she mutters against his lips when she feels him begin to pull away.

“I’ll see you Monday,” he promises. 

“Too far.

Harry laughs, “you can call me tomorrow when you wake up.” Knowing she likes to sleep in, he would rather not wake her up. 

“Okay,” she whispers in defeat. 

“Good night,” Harry takes a step back. 

Y/N bites her lip and gives him a wave. “Do you want a kiss goodbye?” 

Harry can’t say no.

+

Monday morning, Y/N walks in with a large smile. It makes everyone stop and stare. She makes her rounds, wishing everyone a good morning, and saves Harry for last. 

“Hi, Harry.” She chirps. 

“Morning,” he answers timidly. 

Y/N pouts because he didn’t even look at her. She wanted to see his beautiful eyes. “So I was thinking…” she trails off. 

Harry turns, giving her his undivided attention, and Y/N’s smile widens. “How does a date sound to you?”

“A date?” He echoes. 

“With me,” she giggles.

“Best thing I've heard all day.”

Y/N claps her hands together, “wonderful.” 

“How does this weekend sound?” 

“Too far,” she teases. “Saturday?” 

“I’ll pick you up,” he promises. 

“Good. Good.” Y/N lingers by his door. 

“Yes, love?” 

Y/N feels her cheeks heat up but doesn’t look away from him. “Are we still on for lunch?” 

Harry gives her a dimpled grin, “I’ve got a new book for us to discuss.” 

Y/N tells him she can’t wait and walks away. Harry watches her go, and as if she can feel his stare on her, she turns around and gives him a wink. Harry knows he’s way in over his head with someone as amazing as Y/N, but he can’t wait to prove each day to her how much he deserves to be with her.

[mistydeyes]

hello! can you please do headcanons of 141 boys with nepo baby!reader?

ahh thank you sm for requesting! this was so creative and UGH i totally wish in another life i could be a nepo baby with all of life's luxuries

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summary: When the 141 met you, you had done an amazing job keeping your repo!baby status under wraps. What happens when your starstrucked boyfriend finally finds out?

pairing: Task Force 141 x fem!nepo baby!reader

warnings: swearing

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John Price

Surprised but happy you aren't one of those stuck up ones (*cough* *cough* Kendall Jenner *cough* cough*)

"Hey love, these came in for you today," your boyfriend, John, said as he heaved in a large bouquet of flowers with an ornate envelope attached

You groaned loudly as you opened the envelope and the room filled with the aroma of fresh red roses

You skimmed over the letter before tossing it back onto your kitchen island

"Something the matter?" he comforted as he wrapped his arms around you

"They just want me to walk for Victoria Secret," you said as if it was an inconsequential request, "something about how my mum's wings and outfit would fit me perfectly."

At this, you felt the palpable silence and turned to see the bewildered look on John's face

"What I'm getting from this is that you are a model fit for their show and also have a mother who used to be a model for them?" he almost whispered and you nodded in response

He whistled quietly as he pulled you back into his arms

"I knew you were gorgeous but it's nice to hear that others think the same," he joked and you lightly smacked at his chest

"My mum always wanted me to get into modeling but after my last show as a teenager, I decided civilian life was more for me"

He nodded as he put aside the letter and put the flowers in a more respectable place

"Well I am glad you chose that," he replied, "don't think I would be able to meet a world class model."

You cocked an eyebrow and laughed slightly at his response

"You're telling me! I'm lucky for a shot at the respectable military captain who looks absolutely dashing in a bonnie hat"

With that, he gave you a soft kiss and you giggled as his facial hairs tickled you slightly

"Although, if I get sent any brand deals for shaving cream and beard care, I know the perfect person to give it to"

Johnny "Soap" Mactavish

Overall he is the most excited to find this fun fact out about you

He realizes when you meet with your sister at a local coffee shop

You ran up to her with Johnny closely following behind you and you hugged her excitedly

"Maeve! It is so good to see you again," you smiled, "this is my boyfriend, Johnny"

Your boyfriend did a double take as your sister shook his hand and sat down at the table

"Do I know you from somewhere?" he asked quietly and you and your sister shared a look before laughing

"Hmm what project are you working on now?" you asked her as Johnny just watched the interaction

"That's a secret for now," she said mysteriously, "I will tell you we're premiering the show on Max"

Once she said that, it was almost as if a lightbulb went off in his head

"Oh shite," he said a bit too loudly, "you're Maeve! You did that show on Netflix!"

She nodded as she sipped her matcha latte casually

"Wait so if that's you," he said before turning to you, "does this mean you're parents are those famous spy movie directors?"

You nodded as he finally understood but before you could reply, your sister beat you too it

"She was always the studious older sister, chose to go to university here instead of pursuing an acting career," you sister proudly replied as you leaned into Johnny's chest

"To be fair, dad's films were always too ambiguous for me," you joked, "he always loved those off plot twists."

You laughed at the memory and both Johnny and Maeve joined in

After that, you had a pleasant lunch but you definitely needed a tea with lemon and honey after answering all of Johnny's questions

Kyle "Gaz" Garrick

You were not a nepo baby by conventional means

No, you didn't have parents who were famous actors or singers

You were the worst kind of nepo baby for Kyle

You were the daughter of a General in the British Army

Maybe he should've been clued in by your surprising knowledge of military history and traditions

In fact he did look at you a bit skeptically when you adjusted his ribbons of decorations/medals

"You're a natural at this," he said as he kissed your forehead. "My dad and the internet taught me all I needed to know," you smiled back.

Kyle never did get to ask you who your father was until you were at the Army ball

When he saw one of the decorated Generals making his way to you, he could feel a lump in his throat

Kyle immediately saluted the man and almost lost it when he saw him hug you and spin your around

"Pleasure seeing you here, dad," you beamed at him, "didn't know you could make it to this one!"

As Kyle was putting the pieces together, the small talk ended and your father turned to him

"Sergeant Garrick-" "Yes, sir, that's me" he said, fumbling over his words and causing you to laugh loudly

"I've heard much about you and the missions," your father spoke highly as you looked over anxiously, "just make sure you come back home to my daughter."

With that, he gave Kyle a firm handshake and hugged you before returning back to mingle amongst the other officers and soldiers

Kyle stood there for a moment looking at his hand

"Did that just happen?" "Congratulations Kyle, you survived meeting my father!"

Simon "Ghost" Riley

He does not put the pieces together until something forces him to realize who you actually are (more like whose daughter you are)

"Keep your head down, I think someone's following us," Simon warned you as he lead you down another aisle in the grocer's

For the past hour, there had been a man with a camera had been following you and trying to snap pictures

Simon had been more than observant and was running through scenarios to lose this man without any unnecessary violence

"Oh, they're probably trying to figure out where my parents are staying while they're in town," you said nonchalantly, "probably trying to get the best pictures before the premiere."

At this Simon, pulled you aside and look at you bewildered

"Are they in any danger?" he said as he pulled out his phone to make an urgent call

You giggled a bit before taking his phone from his hand and smiling

"No, no, they're probably just preparing to be harassed by the paparazzi. Nothing they're not used to," you said as you typed a few things into his phone's search browser

"Here, you might have heard of them before from all those superhero action movies," you continued, giving Simon back the phone so he could look at the Wiki page

"So you're saying that you didn't think this was important information to tell me when we started dating?" he asked as he looked back down at you

You rolled your eyes before pulling him along to continue you're shopping

"I honestly didn't think it was that important, Simon," you mumbled, "besides would it affect your decision to date me."

He shook his head as he tried to understand the whole situation and how you were the daughter of two very famous and successful actors

"For such a smart military man, you are a bit dense sometimes," you joked before turning and blocking the titular shot from the camera man with a cereal box

"Not this time!" you yelled triumphantly before Simon took the opportunity to plant a kiss on your cheek

"That's why I dated you."

[lovelyladyabsinthewrites]

My hc as being the daughter of SB and sister to HL:

Soldier Boy/Daughter

His feelings towards having a daughter I would say is very “neutral” given his behavior towards women, he’s more or less pretty awkward about it because now he’s like “Do I have to not act like a dick with this “thing”?”

But surprisingly he TRIES to be less vulgar and does try to protect you in a sense that he knows how men think

One of his main phrases with you is “A lady shouldn’t act like this” basically overall EXTREMELY MISOGYNISTIC sadly you don’t know any better growing up

You learn about womanhood through his various lady friends, don’t even bother asking him because he’ll probably kindly tell you to fuck off KINDLY

Awkward hugs, like “there, there”

Any bully that you may have depends on whether they are male or female

Male = beats the shit out of them, then their dad, then fucks their mom and will probably steal their bike to give to you as a Xmas present, it’s July btw

Female = acts all nice and when no one is looking tells them this “If you keep fucking with my kid, I’m gonna fuck your mom and ima gonna be your new daddy..now give me $20”

He’s gonna keep the $20

Homelander/Sister

SISTER COMPLEX

He did pretty much raise you the minute SB brought you home

Your the only consistency he has in his life, growing up he tries his best to protect you from everything SB related (doesn’t always work)

When SB brings home a lover HL tells you that’s dads special friend and if they are too loud which is all the time he gives you ear muffs and plays the quiet game with you

SB is passed out in the hallway? Oh he’s sick he’ll be fine (probably)

Isn’t particularly happy when the team Payback is around but is glad that they are under SB’s foot

Doesn’t mind Black Noir, both you and HL are pretty attached too him growing up

But as you grow older and venture out and try to make new friends, HL gets extremely jealous wanting to be your ONLY BSF

Calls your friends “sluts” for trying to erase his influence over you and if you get a bf he will totally SNITCH to SB

His fondest memory of you both is when you were kids and trying to avoid SB because he was in one of his moods and you and him were under the covers, you pinky promised him that you’ll never leave him and he’ll never leave you

His “friends” are your friends and doesn’t see anything wrong with that Bc he’s your big bro and he could always use Maeve and Starlight as a scapegoat

SB would hold his baby girl at arm's length, unsure of what to do with this delicate little thing.

first few years of your life he'll dress you up in boy clothes cuz he doesn't want to deal with baby girl clothes with all the pinks and frills. Homelander will be the one to pick you up a yellow onesie with a big sun on the front from a thrift store with his money from being a paper boy

Soldier Boy will find himself growing softer the longer he cares for you. When it's just the two of you at home, he'll even speak softly to you with a lilt of using a baby voice. he'll outright deny it though if Homelander catches him using the voice

the way you learned about periods? one of SB's lady friends left her purse out in the living room and you rifled through it, finding not just her cigarettes but some funny looking torpedo things. she informed you how it worked. literally terrified you because bleeding for four days straight is not normal and SB sure as hell wasn't going to teach you about feminine hygiene.

and from the Crimson Countess you learn that some women also wear the flimsiest underwear.

"Did you see her underwear? It looks like it's made out of floss!" you'd giggle while HL can only flush and tell you that's not what proper ladies wear and steer you the other way

really, the only member of Payback that you and HL liked was Black Noir. he'd draw with you or take you and your brother out if everyone was being too. . . rowdy

Buster Beaver's Pizza Restaurant becomes a favorite

really, Black Noir is the only male HL feels comfortable letting you be around

even his male friends he trusts to a certain degree. never would he leave his sister completely alone with any of them. more like they're his little spies who tell HL of any other bugs scuttling around you

he doesn't like it when you make your own friends who try and pull you away from his side

will do anything to turn you against these 'sluts'.

both of you have bonded through the trauma of growing up with Soldier Boy. huddled under the blankets to ignore the outside world. Homelander holding you close and promising it will always be just the two of you against the rest of the world. and you full heartedly believe him because he'd never lie to you. not your beloved big brother who carries the sun on his shoulders just for you. even if he doesn't like your friends that aren't his. after all, he was just trying to keep you safe. that was his main goal in life.

and frankly, as bad as HL sister complex was, your big brother complex was even bigger

as you were Homelander's only constant, he was your's as well.

@theeonlyroman thank you so much for sending all these HC 😭❤️ i look forward to every single one of them and get so giddy and excited to answer them ❤️

[super-hero-confessions]

i wanna say that the idea that maeve could have gotten pregnant from her time with butcher is stupid. because it is:

sex ed aside that unprotected sex doesn't always result in pregnancy (not an invitation. use protection if you don't want venereal consequences people. just a reminder that plenty of couples try for years with no results and some never succeed and as popular as one night stand pregnancy stories are, they aren't exactly rooted in realism.) and the donor being remarkably unhealthy (taking hard drugs and alcohol can be like a mini nuke for testes, butcher admitted to having done everything and who even knows what temp v could have done in addition to his past. that doesn't even touch on his age). maeve also kinda went through the ringer after that happened (captured and gassed with an unknown chemical a couple times) and it would be kind of a miracle for her reproductive system to survive at all after getting blasted with enough radiation to get the v burnt out of her system. on top of falling from a tall ass building and breaking a ton of shit and again add in the fact that she's older? even if an embryo somehow managed to survive all that brutal beating, i really don't think a now human maeve would survive a pregnancy in the condition she was left in. this is a very unrealistic theory to sprout from one offhand comment about an old guy being drunk and stupid. safer to bet on butcher being sterile.

but. i'm also gonna say the outright hatred of this theory is really fucking stupider and pretty baseless. as much as the show aims for realism within the setting, it's still a crazy show based off a crazy comic in a fictional world where even if something is kinda dumb or seems illogical it can still happen, much like in the real world. whatever, who gives a fuck, let it be, let people have fun. if you don't like the idea, fine. if you like the idea, fine. but obvious petty jealousy over a fictional dude and what his fictional swimmers do is obvious and gross.

now to put my own hat in:

given all of the conditions and factors at play and because butcher had taken temp v. i'd much prefer the idea that the comment does mean something in light of him and maeve creating... something. horrific. i like the idea that their messed up situations and conditions led to the creation of an actual monster. maybe something like that resident evil fetus creature or a tentacle demon much like the one roaming butcher's body. or maybe even something like the cannibalistic baby creatures from the 1974 it's alive horror film. now that. perfect sense and epic.

[astarab1aze]

🩵 [ Loux and Maeve <3 ]

muse relationship headcanon game

who curses more?

lol loux. every other word out of his mouth is 'fuck' or shit'. he's got maeve beat on this one 100%, he's so vulgar. how she can deal with it is beyond me

who is more patient?

i'm going to say maeve. loux has a lot of patience, but she has even more if she can tolerate him. he's such an ass (who does horrible, horrible things), gets into trouble, mouths off and sounds like an idiot half the time- and yet. gotta be maeve.

who does the driving?

iirc maeve doesn't drive? it's all public transportation and walking, things like that, and loux is the exact same except he's also got his mirror. so between the two of them, no one's doing any driving, but how about maybe they take turns paying for public fair--

who is louder? who is quieter?

definitely loux, as the louder one. but i do imagine maeve getting giddy and excited about all the things and loux being on the quieter side on some occasions, since he sometimes plays an observer when on outings or dates just to get a feel for whether she's enjoying herself. hmmm. i'm gonna say 50/50 actually. all contextual.

who is more physically affectionate?

loux 100%. i don't know that i need to elaborate on this point, cos you already know he's a bit of a menace. he loves to touch, feel, kiss, and...well, hold hands, grope, dance, etcetc so he's probably always going to be touching maeve in some way. very handsy, and not always in a horny way.

who is more likely to tease the other?

maeve pulls one over on him all the time, i bet you. she's got a playful, mischievous streak in her. not to the same degree as loux, but it's there. and she gets him back for all his tricks

who is better with time management?

i'm going to say loux but only because he got lucky and has magic at his disposal. his days are always packed with all the things he's gotta do for 'work' right, but he always always makes time, schedules properly, the whole nine, and can make it work because of his little mirror and magic.

who wins the arm wrestling matches?

i'm gonna say 50/50 here. he wins some, she wins some, they both lose sometimes. loux's not a strength-oriented guy, shines best when it comes to magic and sleight of hand. arcane trickster type.

who controls the music in the car ride?

they walk everywhere or take ye olde pocket mirror, and i imagine they talk basically the whole time. at home? different story. but there's no car to play music in.

who covers dinner when they order in?

loux and he'll hear nothing about it.

who is more outgoing? who is more shy?

i think they're both pretty outgoing? or at the very least, maybe not very outwardly shy. shy in ways, but that's only a little part of it. they're both friendly and talkitive? final answer: they're both outgoing, social. maybe bashful? at times. but not retreat into the safety of my hovel shy. having a hard time articulating what i mean sksksk

who has the more outlandish fashion sense?

loux, 10000%, and i've got his wardrobe right here--

who starts the tickle fights? who ends them?

i feel like both of them would start them, but maybe loux would end them. as he does. with sloppy gross kisses like a puppy, which he kind of his now that i think about it...

who has the darker/more "edgy" sense of humor?

loux by an entire 30 miles. he's a total edgelord 99% of the time, just thinking about it makes me want to throttle him. nuke him from orbit. he's gotta tone himself down a bit cos edgy humor is OUT--

who is more competitive when it comes to games?

they're both at least somewhat competitive, so i can totally see them going ham, no holds barred, in carnival games, interactive street...events in salem's crossing or belle's hollow, at least until one of them wins the whole thing. they get to take home double prizes sometimes, i bet. in terms of video games, loux will just end up breaking the controller, not out of frustration but like. because he's genuinely that bad with technology.

who has the bigger appetite? the bigger sweet tooth?

i have no doubts they can both put away a lot of food, but loux's gonna have to take the cake here i think. he's a walking garbage disposal and will put just about anything in his mouth. relatively low appetite, but when he eats, he eats. a lot. burns through a lot of calories existing, just sitting there. sweets? i thiiiink...loux, still. the guy can put away 60 cupcakes in one sitting and will.

who is more likely to get in a confrontation in public?

loux. oh loux 100000%. if it isn't sorciers, it's some asshat who disrespected him or maeve in some way, and he is not afraid to speak his mind in any way, shape, or form. he can talk the talk and walk the walk, and there may be an occasion or two in which he proves that. he won't apologize either, it's an honor/principle thing for him.

who hosts the parties/hangouts? who organizes them?

i think they take turns setting things up but in the beginning, it's definitely loux, trying like hell to spend as much time with her as he can, and they sort of bounce ideas off of each other. like when they went out for coffee and then their trip to salem's crossing after. mhmm. it's like a game of pong and the ball they bounce between each other is date ideas sjdfksd

who is better at cooking? do they ever cook for each other?

they can both cook, but i'm going to say loux because of how nuts he is about it. homie's like, gordon ramsey the second he sets foot in a kitchen. a complete perfectionist, maybe not about methodology but certainly about the final product, so i imagine him doing a lot of cooking. but also enjoying when maeve does the same for him. 50/50 on who cooks and when, but it's definitely a both situation.

who is more likely to engage in dangerous and/or illegal behavior?

:I LOL loux.

who is more likely to notice when something is wrong with the other?

it depends, but i think they'd both be able to spot something amiss with each other relatively quickly. loux isn't as quick to solve anything that isn't physical, but he does try. i maintain that maeve is probably better at dealing with it all than he is.

who does the talking in public settings (i.e. to the waiter at a restaurant)?

50/50 on this one. i think it depends on the context. if they're in salem's crossing, or any of the nightfolk locations, then until she's sort of used to them, loux'll probably do most of the talking, for a few reasons. not to limit her or anything, but as a precautionary measure. everywhere else? i don't think it matters. they both talk and for themselves when ordering food, checking out, whatever.

who is more likely to extend a helping hand & provide emotional support?

gonna say maeve on this one. loux has his ways and yes, sometimes he does help other people with emotional things, but he's no good with his words, so it's much easier for him to physically fix a problem. maeve, on the other hand, is more sensitive to the emotional needs of others, more attuned to that in general. i think loux would be there for her 100%, but i think maeve would know best how to identify and navigate it. and be better at it.

who is the bigger prankster? do they get the last laugh or do they suffer for it?

maeve pulls one over on him all the time, i bet you. she's got a playful, mischievous streak in her. not to the same degree as loux, but it's there. and she gets him back for all his tricks. it's gotta be something of a vicious cycle between the two of them, but lots of good fun too. they get some laughs out of it, no suffering omg. unless suffering can be taken to mean something else, in which case yes maybe lots of that to everyone's chagrin--

[silkiemae]

Empire of Storms by Sarah J Maas

My Rating: 3.75/5

So I know I’m supposed to be all rooting for Aelin to get to her throne and rule over Terrasen, but I was cackling like an evil witch when Darrow was rejecting the shit out of her claims. While he said some things that should’ve earned him a swift kick in the ‘nads, he also made some super-valid points. As far as all of Terrasen knows, when EoS begins, Aelin has been MIA for the last ten years. She shows up out of nowhere with a surprise assassin background; she has been living in luxury right under the king of Adarlan’s nose, boning the crown prince and the captain of his guard, who were at the time both considered enemies of her country. After killing the king of Adarlan and claiming the credit for destroying Rifthold, she threatens to kill all of the people in Rifthold if they step out of line. I’m sorry, but that would not win you any points anywhere. I don’t know why she’s so shocked that they don’t acknowledge her as queen. I don’t understand why she’s so surprised she has to earn her throne. 

I like that people are calling out Aelin for the almost tyrannical way she’s been behaving. She has no advisors teaching her how to act as a queen. All she has are warriors at her back who do not have the proper ability to counsel her. She needs people who know what the fuck they’re doing to teach her how to behave. Sure, Aedion and Rowan can teach her about war. Aelin knows how to fight. But she has absolutely no idea how to rule and can’t just expect to walk in the door and have the throne handed to her. A year ago, she was blowing all of her money on gowns and books when she should’ve been saving it for that dream house. A year ago, she was blabbing all her secrets to Nehemia, a spy who betrayed her. A year ago, she was making out with Dorian, the son of the man who murdered her family. I’m sorry, but Aelin is not fit to be queen. 

And yes, even though Rowan and his cadre are hundreds of years old and have far more experience in warfare than any of Aelin’s court combined, they never once advise Aelin, nor does she allow anyone to advise her. This is one of the things I find most infuriating about Aelin. Every time someone rightfully calls her out for being a show-off, rude, or manipulative, she turns around and somehow makes that person feel like an idiot for ever calling her out. If you talked to your companions and informed them about just one thing, this might not happen. If you can’t trust the people willing to fight and die for you, then why should they trust you?

Also, Aelin got much more powerful in this book than in the previous ones. She exhaled a breath of air, and then a man crumbled into ash. Since when has she been able to transport her fire like that magically? It’s always had to come directly from her. She seems to be able to do all sorts of things with her fire now that never was before a possibility. I don’t like that Aelin is so powerful that it’s almost as though she cannot be defeated and that Maeve had to construct this elaborate plan to get her into a weak spot. And with every battle, Aelin beats everyone with barely a scratch on her or anyone else. 

The battle at Skull’s Bay was far too easy, and sure Deanna took control and made things go awry, but everyone still made it out completely fine. Lysandra should’ve died tbh. Not that I want her to die, I like Lysandra, and I want her to survive, but if SJM wasn’t so afraid of killing off characters she liked, then Lysandra would not have survived her fight with the sea wyverns. When the 500 ilken show up, Aelin takes out every single one of them in a single blast(with a little help from her friends), and it’s just like…really? 500 liken? That makes for literally zero challenge except to deplete her magic so that there can be barely a fight at the end when Aelin is taken. 

SJM did basically the same thing she did with ACOWAR in this book. Every time they think they’re about to lose, a new army shows up to save the day. First, Ansel shows up with her Melisande army. Maeve’s armada turns against each other because Rowan told his cousins about how he got a new girlfriend. Manon’s Thirteen show up because Abraxos went to find them, Ganon and his armada, and Silent Assassins from the Red Desert. Like, yes, it’s much more thought out and planned, and we know that all these people owe a debt to Aelin somehow, so I did like that bit. Still, the fact that she was so unwilling to share any of this information and by the end when she’s taken Aedion is so guilt-ridden for ever questioning her and thinking her this amazing self-sacrificing goddess and like…no! Aedion, you should be mad at her! 

Not only did she not trust you enough to tell her a single one of her plans, but she also took your blood oath and gave it to her new boyfriend without considering you once; she made your new girlfriend lie to you behind your back for months and then set up a plan without your consent that you would have to be breeding stud for her while she posed as YOUR COUSIN. Aedion has every reason to be mad at Aelin, and I hate that because SJM is so in love with Aelin that every other character is also in love with her and won’t ever dare stay mad at her for longer than a chapter or two. 

Even Lorcan, who I liked because of his hatred for Aelin, CRIES OVER HER because of her self-sacrificing bullshit. It’s hard to take that prophecy seriously when SJM removes the gravitas behind anyone’s sacrifice. She did it with Rhysand and Amren. She did it with Feyre. Chaol should’ve died two books ago, but SJM couldn’t do it. It will not surprise me when Aelin survives forging the Lock and lives happily ever after. 

Now that I’m done complaining about Aelin. 

I enjoyed this book for the most part. This is SJM’s best series in terms of being well thought out regarding the plot. I like the build-up to most of the relationships, but once they get together, it falls flat. I mainly think it’s due to SJM’s penchant for unbelievably cringy dialogue and poorly written sex scenes. 

Aelin and Rowan getting secretly married did nothing for me. Their relationship does nothing for me tbh. I don’t care about them and want Aelin to die or get an entirely new personality in the next book. But if Endovier didn’t make her lose her entitlement, I doubt her time with Maeve will. 

Lysandra is my favorite character. I think she’s a bad bitch; I love shapeshifters who can turn into literally whatever they want. I liked the relationship between Aedion and Lysandra up until the end, and now I hope they never get together. If I were Aedion, I would not be so willing to forgive Aelin or Lysandra. 

Elide and Lorcan’s journey was fun, and I enjoyed it for the most part. I really wanted to like them together, but there was such an emphasis on their age gap and the fact that Elide was ‘barely a woman’ made it feel creepy to me. It comes off as pedophilic when a 500-year-old man thirsts after ‘barely a woman’ and constantly talks about how young and dainty she is. Talking about how her cycles are regular and shit, like…come on. Still, when they finally kissed, it was sweet, but then Lorcan showed just how pathetic and male he was when he crawled to Maeve and cried over Aelin. 

So, I know it’s not going to happen, but I’m going to dream that now that Elide wants nothing to do with Lorcan, she’ll realize that she is in love with Manon, and they’ll run away together on Abraxos’ back. Seriously, I don’t see why Manon likes Dorian at all. I get it as a distraction while she’s stuck on that boat, but he is so bland and not good enough for Manon, sorry. Manon and Elide are my OTP in this book, goddammit. 

Two more things to mention, and I think that’s it. 

I wish SJM would go a different route than making her villains sexual offenders. Erawan and Maeve are rapists, and it just feels so unneeded. They can be evil without also having to rape your characters. The fact that Maeve uses her blood oath to force the men in her service into her bed is so fucked up. And then Erawan uses and abuses Kaltain for so long that she also kills herself to be self-sacrificial. I think her death was a waste. That bitch ate a whole demon and took back control. She could’ve been so cool. 

And my last question. 

WHERE THE FUCK IS FLEETFOOT? WHY DOES NO ONE GIVE A FUCK ABOUT THIS POOR DOG? ( I know she’s with Evangeline, but Aelin doesn’t think about her dog once. I knew she didn’t deserve that dog when she started demanding that other people take care of her for her.)

[painofhumanity]

⭐️⭐️ (for Jason) ⭐️⭐️ (For Henrietta)

For each “⭐️” I get, I’ll write a headcanon about our muses.

Jason & Reid

Jason likes to read the same books as his dad, so that they can talk about them later. Though because he still struggles with his dyslexia, he usually listens to the audiobook instead of reading them. Some of them go over his head, but even when he doesn't understand them (or doesn't even like the books), he still likes discussing the books together, because it's a way for them to connect. Sometimes he feels like they understand each other better because they have their little two-person book club.

Jason doesn't remember, but when he was little, he asked to get shoes like Daddy's, so Maeve went out and bought his first little pair of Converse. He still wears them as a teenager (now in various colors), but he doesn't think much about the fact that his dad wears them, too. It's just something he's used to.

Hen & Reid

Henrietta often talks to Uncle Spencer about the frustrations of not understanding how to "be normal", or why people get annoyed with her for talking "too much", or missing jokes that everyone else gets. He's the reason she started reading books on profiling and psychology, because he told her that they helped him to understand people better--even if he's still a little off-beat in most social situations.

He was the first person to catch onto her special interests when she was little and start engaging in them with her; he helped her parents engage with her, too. He memorized facts about the things she was interested in (namely birds and Bowie), so that when she started infodumping about them, he could actually share some fun facts of his own. Every time he does, Henrietta lights up, because it's like someone finally speaking her language.

[marinerainbow]

Here is the reblog I promised! Also, I did touch up on Poppy, Shiny, and Moony. Though Henry's, Terry's, and Ben's (though I am considering making Terry indian as a human. If so, I'll have to change him too 🤔), but these three needed some touching up.

For Shiny it was mainly her eyes and colors. Also, as you can see, I also made Shiny when she doesn't have her makeup on (her freckles are supposed to be speckled over her shoulders and back as well)

The left picture is just the transition between Shiny and Poppy. I loved how the eyes looked abd she kinda looks like another character XD the left, Poppy's hair is more full/fluffy looking (I think). And just in general her features feel more balanced out here? It could just be me though (if this app had oval shaped glasses, I would have added that for her reading glasses. But this only have the big, round glasses)

And the one I like most, Moony. I think I failed to rough him up in his previous picture, but I found a scar! I also tried to make him look taller/muscular with the portrait by squaring his jaw and extending/thickening his neck. That is an earring in his ear, but I tried to color it so it looked like another scar, or better yet a tear, in hus ear. Also, of course, the eye highlights giving his eyes more depth ^^

Alright, now that the new looks are out of the way, here are the era accurate headcannons for my OC's. Be warned since these do contain racism and homophobia, as these guys would live in the early 20'th century. It is not portrayed as a positive thing whatsoever. My friend helped me with these headcannons, but I do apologize if I get anything wrong.

For starters; Shiny's human name is now Maeve, not Miriam. If I'm correct, it's an irish name with various spellings that mean intoxicating or she who rules. That's important later.

Marcus has to put in a lot of effort to control his anger issues and strength here. He has had people call the police on him for simply looking too threatening. So even if he comes off as a chill sort of guy, it's mainly to keep people off his back. And that doesn't mean he'll tolerate anyone trying to pick a fight with him. He'll just try to de-escalate the situation before it gets out of hand (though, he has been known to lose his temper and knock out a racist or two). He tries to live his own life even if the odds are stacked against him.

He was really pushed over the edge, however, when he found out his father had been ganged up on his way home from the store. He was fortunately still alive, but he had to retire early due to massive damage done to his knees. Marcus wanted to find who did it and teach them a lesson, and grew more frustrated when his father told him that that would only make things worse. He knew that, but how can he just stand back and let his father take a beating?? For a while since then, Marcus was very distrusting of white people.

When he met Sophie, he didn't like her at all and tried to shrug her off. They met after his crew was hired to rebuild a burnt down set in the studio Sophie worked in. She looked scared and hurt around him, and he figured it was because of his race, and tried to just avoid the actress. It wasn't until an accident that caused a slash down his eye did he see her show genuine concern over him. From then on, the two had started to develop a friendship that eventually led to them falling in love after Henry left her.

Unfortunately, their relationship didn't last long. When Marcus saw people starting to treat Sophie horribly because of their love, he decided to end their relationship for her. He lied and told her he fell out of love with her, believing that to be better and help her move on, even as she clung onto him and begged him not to go. As we know, they did move on and remain good friends. However, Marcus does still hold love for her in his heart.

While Marcus is trying to avoid trouble, Maeve doesn't care so much. She has committed genuine crimes, however her record also contains 'crimes' where she refused to be pushed around. She's sat at the front of the bus, she's used 'white' bathrooms, etc. Maeve, like Marcus, has had to face so much prejudice her whole life and has reached the end of her rope.

Maeve was born to an irish woman named Cara. Mallie didn't see her father much, but that was because he and Cara thought it was too dangerous to stay together. Both blacks and whites would have hated their union, and there were already rumors spreading about them (all true, but still). So they thought the best decision was to live apart. Drew tried to visit Mallie as much as possible, but with his job at sea and trying to keep his family safe from discrimination, it was difficult to do so.

Even though Cara never said a bad word about her dad and was honest about everything, Maeve couldn't help but resent the fact that he wasn't around. Especially when she had to witness her mother having to bear hatred from their neighbors. Kids at school were ok, until their parents taught them to stay away from her. As much as Cara taught her to be strong and to know who she is, not listen to what everyone else said, Maeve was still struggling.

It really came to a head when Cara died in a car crash when Maeve was 12. And since her parents weren't married, Drew couldn't take custody of his daughter, and Maeve was forced to live in an orphanage. Her resentment towards the world grew, and she chose to run away just a year later. She managed to pick up a job at a diner after lying about her age.

Years later, Maeve also kept getting in trouble for being open about her sexuality. She didn't care to hide who she was despite facing disgust and rage everyday for it. The club that she now currently works at was her safe place, however. Being owned by a man who was in a lavender marriage himself, this club was practically the only place around Maeve could be herself. And that's why, despite the rowdy crowd and having to deal with patrons who try to take more than they paid for, Maeve still works as a dancer and waitress there.

Speaking of which- Maeve has heard plenty of comments about her 'exotic' features. Calling her a rare beauty and seeing her as an object rather than a person. Even though she expects it by now, she's still not very happy whenever she receives a comment like this.

Eventually, Drew was able to find her and, even though the separation was hard on Maeve and it took a lot of time for her to trust him after her life had been turned upside down, the two were able to bond again. Even if Drew still has his job at sea, their relationship has been repaired by now.

Her being open about herself has encouraged her coworkers and some regulars to do the same. In fact, that's how she meets Terry and Sophie in this AU; Terry had heard whisoers that this club was a haven for homosexuals like him. Even though he didn't intend on outing himself to the crowd, he chose to go and take a look. When he saw Maeve openly flirt with another woman before heading towards his table, he knew right then and there that this was going to be his favorite spot. Sophie came later, after befriending Gabriel, and he insisted on taking her to one of his favorite night spots. Seeing Sophie with her frenemy, Maeve chose to see what kind of woman the former actress was. It wasn't long before the two women became great friends, and more in the future.

Terry, unlike Maeve, tries to hide himself as much as possible. He's seen what people do to 'his kind', and is genuinely terrified of what will happen to him if his coworkers find out he's gay- especially since he works with so much dangerous equipment. He has made some work friends, but he doesn't trust them enough with his secret to share, and he never printed flyers for a roommate. It's a lonely life, but he's gotten used to it. It's much better than getting killed in your own home. He genuinely admires Maeve, and fears for her, for letting people see her true self despite the risk. He thinks she's crazy, but he'll stand by her side if someone tries to mess with her.

Now for Sophie, she was born to a French woman and an American. You already know her troubled history with her parents, her mother trying to make her a star and not caring how it ruined her childhood in the process. Being dragged into any stage play or audition during her teen years, it isolated Sophie from her classmates, and she hardly had the energy to figure out what she wanted. By the time she's an adult, Sophie completely forgets what her own dream was because of how focused she was on her parents' dream.

Sophie's mother quickly married her father in order to be a legal citizen of America. It was a loveless marriage from the start, and Sophie could recognize it even as a young child. She and her mother once had a loving bond, especially with their shared love of the piano. But those memories have long been tarnished by now.

Sophie and her mother were able to pass for white. So, other than being taught to keep her French heritage to herself, Sophie didn't face the same prejudice that people of color did. The first time she was exposed to racism however, was when she overheard her parents both make comments about a Mexican person at the store. When Sophie asked why they were being mean, she was told that the guy wasn't a 'true' American. And when she pointed out to her mother that she's not an American herself, she was swiftly silenced and told that they were 'different'. It greatly confused Sophie, but as she grew older she started to understand.

Even though Sophie didn't conciously agree with her parents, she still avoided people of color out of fear of angering them. She has remained silent in the face of injustice before at her school and around her parents. It wasn't until she started to pull away from her parents did she realize what she was doing and put a stop to it. Sophie feels immense guilt for it now, and won't hesitate to stand up for someone if she sees them being harassed. This was especially hammered into her when she started to date Marcus, and got a front row seat to how black people were treated.

Sophie didn't really realize she was bisexual until much later. When she started to question her sexuality, she became more confused and scared. She was so sure she was straight, and she had seen news articles of what happens to homosexuals at the time. The only person she opened up to about it was Marcus- and that was how she found out he was questioning his own identity as well. They both of course agreed to keep their bisexuality to each other. It was scary for her, but knowing she had Marcus to support her helped a lot.

When Sophie got to meet Maeve, it was a huuuuge raging alarm in her head; she definitely liked women xD even though it was obvious Maeve was swung both ways, Sophie didn't open up to her until after a while they had become friends. She was a little surprised at how calm about it Maeve was- not overly excited or anything, just calm- but she greatly appreciated it too. Maeve helped Sophie figure herself out and feel comfortable in her new identity.

When they fell in love and got together however, Sophie was still very much afraid of being open about them. She was scared of Maeve getting hurt, and acts like they're just friends in public. It contradicted greatly with Maeve's lack-of-fucks-to-give attitude, making her go in for a kiss or call Sophie a pet name in public (which made Sophie really struggle because she loves PTA. She had to fight hard to not return the affections). They did have to have a long talk about it. It was one of those things where no one was in the wrong, with mainly Sophie stressing out about how they always put themselves in danger when they do that. Maeve, although was initially hurt, did understand Sophie's point of view. But she wanted Sophie to not live in constant fear, either. They managed to figure out their own system; at home, in front of friends, or at the club, they can love each other as much as they want. In public though, they would pretend to just be friends. Until it is safe for them to be open about their love.

Also, not that important, but Sophie's skin is sensitive to the sunlight. Which is a shame since she loves strolling through the beach or the park xD she packs a lot of sunscreen, and even has a parasol at home. (*psst @slashingdisneypasta Imagine any of Poppy's/Sophie's S/O's helping her apply the sunscreen. Ok bye-)

That's what I have so far. I hope I got these accurate, and that you enjoyed reading ^^

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!! Omg I'm so happy you like them!!! I glad I got your OC's right too ^^

Ok ok. Remember, other than Poppy, these are mainly me spitballing ideas until I find a design that works best. With that out if the way, let's get to it in alphabetical order ^^

Ben Cottontail/Ben Cooper

This is the second one I feel most assured in design. I want him to look as plain as your typical perfect school boy looks. Basically, you can tell that he values too much in the wrong things just by looking at him. I was trying to go for a strawberry blonde look, though I doubt I succeeded 😅

Henry Foxworth/Henry Worthington

Henry on the streets VS Henry being blackmailed into marriage by you-know-who. He is meant to have a more dirty, cheating Flynn Rider look. Or, as you perfectly put it, a fusion between Nick Wilde and Prince Hans. I want his hair to stick up anime style like your drawing of him showed, but this app didn't have that option XD

Moony Wolf/Marcus Wheeler

Moony's design I'm having the most trouble with. Both as a toon and a human (as a toon, I want him to look scary while also keeping the 30's-40's cartoon style. As a human, how can I humanize Moony if I don't even have his toon design fully developed? 😅). I do know I want him to be African American at least, though. And I want his eyes to be a reddish brown to best replicate his red eyes as a wolf. I tried to make him look roughed up while simultaneously make him look like he's actively taking care of himself. I still have a lot to figure out about Moony's design.

Poppy O'Hare/Sophie O'Brian

You already know what Pops looks like, but I still wanted to include her... Not to mention the blood effect did make me think of how, as friends with gangsters, she had to have witnessed at least one murder...

Shiny Weasel/Miriam Hill

I was originally going to make her Augurn, but then I realized she started to look too much like Jessica Rabbit. So bright brown hair it is XD she is also supposed to have freckles... But I forgot XD (she does wear foundation at work, though. So we'll say that this is her club look). I'm thinking about making her African American as well, or mixed race.

Terry Ratt T./Terry R. Jordan

Terry's was simultaneously fun and frustrating to do. I needed to make him look as ratty as possible XD I think this one is my favorite most of all.

Now, the most important question... Would Rena smash or pass? I'm kidding I'm kidding XDD (unless... 👀)

MOONY, my wolfy husband,

IS EVEN H O T T E R

THEN I THOUGHT.

ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME?? 'roughed up while simultaneously make him look like he's actively taking care of himself'- I'm looking at him through this excellent lense, as well, and ohhhh boy ❤💕❤💕❤💕

I love how Ben has such an angel face XD And HENRY OH MY LORD- you wnat me to throw away my morals dont you?? You want me to throw off the Hunt?? Call Greasy and Bugs off the search for him dead or alive??? I refuse!! No! XD But he is hot 😅XD Oh my lord.

Poppy, of course ^^ She's so pretty ^^ And now that we have the guys looks, I'm having a lot of fun picturing that sweet lady with them!! Her and Moony are p a r t i c u l a r l y cute! XD

SHINY IS B E A U T I F U L !!! I love her hair and eye make up! Its not what I was expecting at all but its different and unique and so Her!! Kinda like a beautiful and colourful, dangerous bird or plant-- which is SO SHINY!

And... I just love how ratty Terry is XDD Love him definitely XD

~

Omg is that a real question??? THE ANSWER IS YES. RENA WOULD SMASH THEM ALL. So would Ryan (Well- Moony, Poppy, Terry and Shiny (though she and her drama are on thin ice- he already has Kingston and his drama's to put up with) at least. Platonically XD If they needed it and simply asked.).

[the-diabolist]

37 Hours

-part 2-

c.w: more suggestive/explicit language, very dialogue-heavy, alcohol. ~1k

As you walk into the kitchen, two kids run out, giggling. Maeve turns on her heel to follow them with nary a word of parting for you - which is fine, as far as you're concerned, because the conversation you're planning to have isn't going to be kid-friendly.

Your best friend is at the island counter, making a tray of snacks and sipping a glass of what appears to be a coke (but is probably mostly rum). You hop up onto a stool across from her and she glances up from her ants-on-a-log.

"Gwendolyn, I wanna climb your brother-in-law like a tree," you say in lieu of greeting.

"Oh honey no," she winces, "dear god. He's a mess."

"Good, I like 'em messy," you grin, waggling your eyebrows suggestively. She laughs. "Tell me what you knowww."

"Ugh, fine. As usual, your taste is terrible," she says, before taking a hearty swig of her drink. "He's 45... no, 46, I think? Whatever, mid-forties. He's a cop."

Your face scrunches up as if you'd just caught a whiff of something putrid.

"I know," Gwen continues, "but if it makes you feel any better, he's apparently quite a slacker. He's not, like, fueled by an all-consuming passion for justice or anything... not that I'm trying to sell you on this terrible idea," she reasserts.

"Hmm," you rest your chin on steepled fingers, considering. "Not necessarily a deal-breaker then. Go on."

Gwen rolls her eyes.

"Never been married, no girlfriend right now - as far as I know, anyway. Dylan says he's always been a player, never really gets serious, tends to have several girls on the hook at any given time."

"Casual works for me. And if I have to beat out a little competition to be his favorite, so be it. I like challenges. Proceed."

"He's moody, often cranky, not as emotionally mature as his age would suggest. His shit is not together in the slightest - his lifestyle basically hasn't changed since high school. And this is all coming from Dylan, I haven't spent much time around him myself."

None of the information she's spilled so far is grounds to terminate your plans for a fling, so you press on.

"And he just moved back here recently, right? I think you mentioned that a while ago."

You steal a sip from her glass while she arranges the platter of snacks in front of her. (You were right: rum.)

"Yeah. It's been a few months. He comes over every so often."

"He seems fairly decent with Maeve." You comment. Gwen shrugs.

"He's not bad. Apparently he doesn't usually like kids, but he's partial to her, I guess. Wish he'd stop smoking around her though."

You start laughing with a snort, nearly spitting out the handful of m&ms you'd just popped in your mouth.

"I uh. May have taken care of that for you," you snicker.

"No shit?" She raises her eyebrows, grinning. "Good girl. He needs someone to knock him down a couple pegs."

"I can definitely help him out with his pegging situation."

Gwen, who had just taken a swig of her drink, immediately does a spit take into the sink and starts laugh-coughing.

"Oh god, I love you," she cackles. "Listen, if you can manage that -- I'll give you fifty bucks."

"I'll do my best, trust me," you smirk. "But first I'm gonna sit on his face."

Your conversation is cut short as the glass door slides open and Maeve bounces back in, holding a folded piece of paper in one hand, which she extends to you.

"Uncle Jack said to bring you this," she says seriously, then begins to wreak havoc on some cookies. You silently meet her mother's eyes conspiratorially, then unfold the paper.

It's his portrait. You furrow your brow in confusion, wondering why he would send it back to you. You notice the corner, where you'd put your number, is torn off - then you flip it over and see he's written something on the back.

Keep this for your spank bank. - the big bad wolf

---

He watches you walk back to the house, admiring your form with even less restraint than his ravenous gaze had possessed while you were sketching. He thinks about how good you probably taste and nearly licks his lips. Finally, he looks over the drawing you'd left with him. It's a good likeness - you're clearly talented - but he does think you've exaggerated his attractiveness a bit. You must be just as smitten as you'd seemed.

They aren't jackal ears, but that would be an absurdly specific request for a child to make - and anyway, they look much the same, and it's uncanny enough as it is. His eyes travel down to the corner, where you've signed your name... and number. He smirks.

You'd left your supplies behind; he grabs a pencil, rips off the corner with your number, and scribbles something down before folding the picture into quarters and handing it off to a nearby Maeve.

As she runs off again, he lights another cigarette and leans back in his chair, visions of you flickering through his mind. The pretty arch your spine would make if he bent you over the back of the couch; the maddening way you'd moan for him, breathless and begging for more; the prefect view of your bouncing tits he'd have if you rode him.

If he walked inside right now and dragged you into the bathroom, would you let him stuff you full of his fingers? He saw how your thighs had pressed together in response to his lascivious comments - he was dying to know how wet he'd made you.

He bets you'd put up a good fight if he chased you. He bets fear looks really good on you. He bets he could get you to scream.

He's going to have a lot of fun with you.

[leahblackk]

Twin Flames

Summary: Emily, Garcia, Spencer and Morgan finds a little journal/Diary from reader and decided to read it, but that lead them to find her obscure secret leaving Spencer Reid with a broken heart.

Little note; This is a universe where Maeve didn’t have a stalker and goes and visit Dr. Reid at wok and not being officially a couple, and this is also a world where JJ haven’t met Will yet.

Couple: Spencer Reid x fem!reader

Type: Angst mostly.

Warnings: Just someone talking about their feelings so I guess not but if you find anything please let me know!

Hello! I’ve been having a really strong hit of inspiration and I own a diary/journal myself and the word by word we see in here might or might not be on my journal/diary word by word as well, but I’m just saying. Someone once told me that you have to use your own pain as a way to lead you to find the right path, as Taylor’s Swift songs, people have broke her heart and look at her, she’s the queen of my heart. So I’m gonna go for the same path as my queen hoping I honored the writers with broken hearts. This might or might not be two or more parts so have fun finding who reader is talking about! And thank you to my bestie for being the first one to read this @junoscorner also tagging someone who wanted me to tag them on my post @measure-in-pain

Also I’ll be tagging these people who tagged me on their writing and I want to do the same @samuel-de-champagne-problems and @ssa-m-187 hoping they keep tagging me! (I think they did or I just confused things lmao my brain is not that good after all)

The air softly entered the bullpen, moving all the way to the team's skin, touching and caressing them, moving strains of hair and some papers on desks. Emily and Morgan worked in front of each other, sometimes looking up to say something and then laugh about it, having a joking manner while their hands moved through their paperwork, wanting to finish it soon as possible so they can finally leave for their plans for the rest of the day, not having cases in that week, something rare but fortunate.

Spencer and Y/n, working next to each other on the other side of the room, Spencer sipping the coffee his dear lovely friend, Maeve Donovan, dropped earlier to make her matutine visit talking with Spencer in the process and making Y/n’s heart mashed a little because of their interaction.

Y/n didn't hate Maeve, she actually thought that she was a sweet and clever girl, and the team liked her, so why would she hate her? Of course, it was stupid to do, but that didn't mean she didn't feel something breaking inside her because of their little interactions. Besides, Y/n never met someone so perfect for Spencer than Maeve.

Y/n was about to finish her pile of paperwork, being tired of that day and being tired of life in general. It has been a really rough week, and she only wished to go home and watch Doctor Who without having to worry about her feelings towards a specific doctor.

For a while now, she had been in the team having a solid and beautiful friendship with Spencer, yet her heart insisted on making an appearance, making her develop feelings for him. Having her heart beat faster and faster until the oxygen in her lungs couldn't make their path and was hurtful and difficult to breathe.

The way her hands shake or sweat when he was around and the way she finds her staring at him more than once, hoping he didn't notice.

She tried to look at those little details no one noticed in him. The way his jawline is more prominent when he's distracted, how he slightly opens his mouth when he's reading or when he is concentrated. How he often bit or licks his lips, and the little nose scrunch he does.

His face was something she couldn't believe, it was soft, and he had moles around it, making it look like stars in the sky. His skin will glow in the sun even though he's sensitive to this one. The way he always has messy hair, Morgan making it massier with his little tease.

She finds Spencer Reid, without doubt, a masterpiece. And not in the way of beauty standards, but because of those little details he had that made him… Spencer Reid.

Her thoughts were shaking out, making her get out of her head when JJ made her way to Spencer's desk sitting on the edge and directing her gaze towards him, Y/n having a view of the back of her white blouse.

Spencer directed his eyes to meet JJs, smiling at her. Y/n looked down at her desk, wanting his eyes to be on her.

"Do you have plans for tonight, Spence?" JJ asked with a soft tone.

Spence.

Her heart ached at the thought of it. JJ brought that nickname for him, the way her tongue rolls to make the words out of her mouth all the way to Y/n's ears and then to her heart to be squeezed in a hurtful way, making her cut her breath which was making its peaceful way to her lungs to keep functioning.

But she didn't hate her either. JJ was the mother of the team, caring for Y/n as well, making sure she was okay, so no, she couldn't hate her.

But she was human, and it hurt.

"No, I do not. I guess I'll watch some documentaries today. I was reading about this new scientist experiment…" he started rambling about his new discovery of the week.

"Spence," JJ cut him off  "Do you think you can change your plans and come with me tonight?"

Y/ns heart stopped.

"I-uh, I-I don't know, i'll think about it."

Why wouldn't he go with her?

JJ was definitely fun to be around, she was great company, and she was so beautiful, so perfect for him.

JJ kept talking about something Y/n didn't hear too well, the blood making echo in her ears making it hurt.

She closed the files and left them there, on her desk. She started putting everything in her bag. Then, with the files in hand, she got up and started walking towards Hotch's office, leaving the files on his desk in his empty office. He already finished his day wanting to spend more time with Jack after a week of just seeing him at bedtime.

She made her way back with JJ still on Spencer's desk, and she took her bag, putting the last things there. Morgan looked at her in confusion, "Are you already leaving, baby angel?"

She looked up at him and gave him a fake smile, nodding, "Yes, I already finished my job, so I can leave now," she said with counterfeit excitement.

"Do you have plans for tonight?" He asked in a flirting manner, moving his eyebrows up and down with a smirk on his face. Y/n heard Spencer cough but didn't look at him.

"Yup, I have my date," she took her bag and made her way out, "With Doctor Who so please do not interrupt me unless it is an emergency. Goodbye," she exited the building hearing some laughs from her coworkers.

Y/n needed to get out of there as soon as possible as her heart was hurting, and the tears of sadness and pain were making their way out and down on her cheeks.

…

Ten minutes after Y/n left, Spencer noticed a scarlet red book with black and brown in the corners, medium size and what seemed like a hardcover in Y/n's desk. His eyebrows almost touched each other when he frowned. Then, he got up and stretched his hand, taking the book in his hand, realizing his statement of the hardcover was correct.

His fingers traced the patterns with a soft touch feeling the fabric and the cold of the book. It didn't have a title on the cover, being just the colour and the pattern. His confusion was increasing now.

He delicately opened the book and looked at the first page full of golden glitter with Y/ns initials. He smiled at the slight touch. He knew that was something she did every time she got a new journal.

So his confusion fades away. That was her journal.

His curiosity begged him to keep reading, but his heart being faithful to her and her trust, didn't want to keep reading because he knew her journal was something personal, and he knew her that well to know that in the next page, there were threats to those who dared open her secret book, so he flipped the page and chuckled when he was right.

"Belongs to Y/n Y/L, and if you find this book either because of coincidence or because you figured where I hide it, I will let you take a minute to consider your well-being and your life and stop reading from here."

He flipped the page again, knowing what it was there.

"Seriously, stop being so nosy and stop reading. Consider your life and take a minute to breathe in. If you keep reading, it might be the last time you do something as simple as that without pain <3."

He laughed this time at her intentions of keeping her privacy and knowing her all too well. He closed the book and put it on his desk.

Y/n was his best friend, and he wouldn't read it because he knows it was her privacy, and if he wanted to know something about her, he would ask, and she trusts him so she would answer his questions, and he doesn't want that trust to fade away. Besides, he owns a journal/diary as well, Y/n introduced him to that world, and he wouldn't want someone reading his.

Even though neither Y/n nor Spencer writes really dark and deep secrets in their journals, knowing someone can read it and both having trust issues, they just write down their thoughts when the weight of them is too much, or maybe when they have an idea of something or to remember.

But Morgan didn't have those intentions when he walked where Spencer was, just the minute after he put the book down and tried to keep it for his best friend until he saw her again after leaving so fast today.

"What do you have there, pretty boy?" Morgan asked.

Spencer looked at him and tried to grab the book to keep it safe from Morgan's hands, but it was too late. "That's uh-t-that's something I've been reading this week," he lied. Derek looked at him in disbelief and smiled, shaking his head.

"Nuh-uh, let's see. Without a title, that's interesting," he looked at the cover and opened it looking at the page with glitter, "This definitely not a normal book, and it's not yours either."

"Just because it has glitter doesn't mean it's not mine," he answered, already annoyed by Morgan's behaviour.

Spencer got up and tried to grab the book, but Derek wouldn't let him. Emily and Penelope walked where the boys were with curiosity. "What are you two doing? I didn't know you could play freezbeewith a book," Garcia joked.

"Pretty boy here was hiding this incredibly interesting book from us."

"Naughty boy," Emily said with a smile.

"Alright, it's not mine. Is Y/ns but please do not open it or read it. It's her personal journal, and she left it here, and I don't think it's a good idea to read it."

"But you were reading it." "I-I wasn't. I was looking at the first pages to know if it was truly hers, and if you look at the following page, you would know she doesn't want anyone to read it."

Morgan looked at him in a joking manner. Then he opened the book and read the first pages. Those Spencer read minutes before, "Well, you weren't kidding with not wanting to read her diary part. Jeez," he said, amazed by the way she threatened them.

"It's not a diary, it is a journal, and if you don't mind, I would want her book back so I can return it to her," Spencer inclined to take the book out of Morgans hands, but he didn't let him bringing the book to his back and laughing at Spencer's face.

"Come on, pretty boy, are you gonna tell me you don't want to read pretty girls journal?" He said, emphasizing the "journal" part after being corrected by Spencer.

"No, I really don't. If I want to know something about her, I'd ask."

"There are secrets that can't be shared," Emily said, looking at Spencer, interfering in the conversation for the first time, with Garcia by her side looking quietly at the group.

"See? Emily agreed to read the journal."

"Uh, excuse me," The brunette said, standing from the edge of the desk where she was. "I never said that. I am only saying there are secrets people can't share, and I know for sure Y/n has them, but that doesn't mean it is a good thing to read her journal."

"Still, I'm curious, so I will read it, and if you three don't, then it is your problem. It is not like I want to know baby angels dirty secrets, but I do want to know what is in that head of hers because I am a good friend, and apparently, I am the only one who has been noticing how she's been acting all weird, and I want to help, and I know she won't say anything but here," he said shaking the book in spencers face. "Is the truth of her behaviour."

Spencer sighed, knowing he won't stop Derek from reading the book. He sat at the edge of his desk with guilt filling his bones, feeling like he was betraying his best friend's trust, even if he wasn't the one holding the book, wanting to know what was written on its pages.

Morgan opened the book and passed pages and pages with his large fingers, trying to look at something recently. He actually didn't want to read her journal and know everything inside of it, but he wanted to help her, and she was a stubborn person who wouldn't admit what was going inside her head.

His eye scanned the letters in her messy handwriting when he found the most recent pages when after those, everything was blank. He smiled to himself for finally finding what he was looking for. He cleared his throat as he was going to give an important speech, but in reality, he would regret reading the journal, making one of Y/ns fears reality; Exposing her heart to what was really in it.

Her messy handwriting said some things 1. She wrote it from her heart. 2. She was shaking when she wrote it as the letters got out of the lines. 3. She was crying when she wrote it. The little dry tears in the soft white paper said so.

Morgan began to read out loud,

"Today, I finally realized things, the ones I wanted to keep away and don't open the Pandora box. The things I wanted to keep believing like the romantic hopeless in love that I am. Because I love love but does love loves me?

Sometimes our hearts fall for the wrong people at the right time, I know people say they find the right person at the wrong time, but it's all the way around for me. I have found the wrong person at the right time, and don't get me wrong, with the wrong person, I do not mean he's bad or anything. He's everything but that. I like to say that men are bullshit, and romantic movies and novels have sold us a standard of men they can't reach. Like Mr Darcy, everyone knows Mr Darcy, right? And why is he perfect? Because he was created by a woman who knows what other women want, and they spend their entire life looking for their Darcy, and some of them have found them. Lucky them.

Why do I say he's the wrong person at the right time? Because he's Mr Darcy, but he's not my Mr Darcy. He's everything I have ever dreamed about someone, what I have wanted, what I have dreamt about and at the right moment? Because I have never wanted someone like him more in my life like these days when I feel alone and when I don't know what to do, he knows when I'm feeling bad, and he was the audacity to look too pretty, too cute, too perfect to remind me he's everything I ever wanted and everything every person have wanted on someone, as a partner for life. To share life with them because he has the best soul someone has ever seen.

But… he's soul is already attached to someone else, and spoiler alert! It's not mine. I have watched him fall in love with someone else so hopelessly that it reminds me of a certain someone. It's actually funny to see someone falling in love the way you have fallen in love with them but with another person… It hurts like hell too.

I have always loved the stories of soulmates and twin flames. I guess I have never believed someone would love me the way I am, so they have their soul connected to mine, and they don't have another way out… or maybe it is just the beauty of it. The beauty of finding someone so perfect for you… too perfect to be real.

I loved love, I have watched love, and I have fallen in love as well. I have made couples, and I have played the role of Eros, and when they didn't believe their soulmate was out there, I always told them that it was because I felt it, because I knew it, because my soul and heart told me so. I have fallen in love with someone I could never have, nor will I even if I tried to. I'm not gonna say the typical "he wouldn't be with me because for who I am," no, he wouldn't be with me because his soul loves somebody else, and I have to watch it every single day of my life, every single day I step in for the job I watch him hug her and laugh with her and looking at her the way I look at him, and it hurts, but I'm not selfish. God! I wish I were I fucking wish I could hate her and make an evil plan to take the man with me,  but my heart knows he's happy with her, and I could never take that away from him because if someone in the world deserves to be happy it's him because he has been through so much and because he had helped people he has… he has helped me. So I know perfectly he deserves it, and her? God, she's the prettiest person, and casually, she's perfect for him.

I loved stories of soulmates and twin flames, wondering if someday mine would come and that someone would love me how the movies and novels talk about. The way the man will do and kill for them. But I realized that I don't have a soulmate. I do not have one. And I thought I would be sad about it. Why am I not sad about it? I don't feel anything at all.

And that doesn't mean I would not get married. I probably will, but not with my twin flame… that person who loves the way I love.

And I always encourage my friends when they doubt their soulmates, but I have never encouraged myself. I have made couples realize the love they hold so dearly for each other.

As the Eros curse has been on me. Eros cannot throw an arrow to himself, and neither can I.

Why do I have to watch the person I fell in love with being in love with someone else and all this pain? What do I do with the pain I'm feeling? Why do I feel this? How can I stop the pain from my heart?

I can't do anything about it. I just have to watch him fall in love with someone else, ignoring the screams my heart is giving because I fell in love with him too."

The bullpen and the four people who were in it fell into silence, those uncomfortable silences. The quiet almost ruled the place, but no, the true king in that situation was the tension. Once held with comfort, the tense air now squeezed them, taking the air out of their lungs.

But mostly Spencer Reid's air. He felt trapped, he felt fear, he was scared. Why was he scared? Why his heart decided to beat so fast like he runs to save his life as the main characters in horror movies?When death is behind them, chasing them, He loved the tension and fear in those movies, but he didn't love how it felt now.

His hands started trembling, so as his legs, he tried to grab the desk, hold onto something, and pretend he didn't hear the words his friend wrote from her heart directly to the paper once it was empty, and Spencer wished it stayed that way.

His heart dropped, feeling an awful pain like knives digging profoundly in his heart.

But mostly, he felt guilt. To know that secret, and because he didn't notice before.

He though… He thought she told him everything, because he does. Or that is what he tries to do. He wants her to be part of his life, but why didn't she let him in?

Why didn't she tell him what she was feeling? All that pain?

Spencer frowned at the thought of her going through that alone.

And mostly, who was the man?

Spencer's heart wanted to know so badly so he could kill him for hurting his... His best friend.

He got up from the desk, Morgan still shook and the girls as well. Not knowing what to do or say, is not like they could talk to her about it because she doesn't know what they have done.

Spencer took the book from Derek's hands, this time being successful. He grabbed his bag and started walking out of the building, ignoring Derek's calls.

He runs all the way to the metro. He wasn't a fan of driving, even if at that moment he want to. The ride to his best friend's house way too long and exhausting. He knew the path too well, counting the number of apartments before arriving at hers, and he used the stairs, wanting to calm down before confronting her. He read the pages in the journal, the ones Morgan read before, over and over again, the pain increasing with every letter or messing ink in the paper.

Finally, Spencer was in front of her dark brown wooden door with the number "13"  above the peephole.

He knocked three times, waiting anxiously for her to appear. And she did.

The door opened painfully slowly, and there she was. With red puffy eyes, as well her cheeks and nose, she has been crying but also sleeping so people wouldn't know the truth behind those hurt eyes. Those eyes he found comfort in now were looking for comfort as well, and he wanted to give her that. He would kill for her to feel that, to feel him there, and he wouldn't leave her alone.

"Hey Spence," her voice broke his heart.

"Why didn't you tell me?" He asked straight to the point.

She frowned, confused at the word leaving his rosy lips.

"Tell you what?"

He didn't have the strain enough to confess his crimes, so he lifts the evidence looking at the panic filling her precious eyes. "Why-why did you? How did you-?" she murmured, not completing the sentence she wanted to give.

"You left it on your desk."

"And you decided it was a good idea to read it, Reid? What were you thinking? Just because you are my best friend doesn't mean you have the right to step on my privacy," she said, angry but not raising her voice, feeling way too tired of everything. She took the book out of his hands and brought it close to her chest, wanting to keep it close to her and impossibly trying to reverse what he had done, but the damage was already there, printed on its pages and the intrusive and unknown hands that had filled it like poison.

Reid.

She never called him that, not even in teasing because she had told him she felt weird doing so, and now he knows he had messed up so badly, but he won't tell their friend was the one who did the damage in the first place, "I-I know it wasn't right, but I wanted to know what was wrong with you in this week, and all weeks before. You have been acting weird, leaving work when you can, not hanging out with anyone—watching Doctor Who without me? I-I didn't know what to do," he explained. It was true he felt that way, but he also used Morgan's excuse.

"There's something that 's called communication. I don't know if you ever heard of it? Like asking and talking?" She asked with obvious sarcasm. Sarcasm was her weapon in that battle, and all battles when it comes to feelings, to her feelings.

"Like you would've told me, right?" And sarcasm was also his weapon. "If someone ever asks you what's wrong, even if it is me, you always turned the topic and didn't talk about it. Keeping your feelings in secret doesn't make it any better, and I thought you trusted me enough to say what's wrong and what you are feeling."

"Yeah, I trusted you until you decided to read my journal without permission."

His heart dropped.

Trusted.

"I know it wasn't right, and I'm not proud of it either, but it is not right to keep your feelings and not to talk about them as well."

"Yeah, because you are the best at talking, right?"

"At least I told you about it."

"Yeah, Spencer, but for some, it is not easy."

"Why? Why wasn't it easy to tell me you were in this pain and someone broke your heart in that way, and he is from work! My god Y/n. You would've told me," he looked at her with exasperation wanting to know why she didn't tell him.

"Because it is you, Spencer, alright? It's you the one who broke my heart, happy?"

He didn't thought his heart would break more than before.

Yes, his heart has broken because his best friend’s was. And because someone broke it, but to know you were the one who caused that pain? It wasn't something easy.

He always wanted her to be happy, and if someone breaks her heart, he will break his legs, but… He broke her heart.

His stomach dropped, and his legs turned into jelly. He looked at her with tears already forming in his eyes as well in hers. He broke her heart.

Those words were going to haunt him forever.

"W-What?" he said in disbelief, wanting so desperately not to be true. "Yes," she said. Her voice breaking. She didn't want to tell him because he deserved to be happy, and because she knew he wouldn't feel the same, she didn't want to ruin their friendship, but mostly because even if he didn't feel the same, breaking her heart was something he wouldn't forgive. "I hope you got the answers you were looking for," and with that, she turned around and closed the door, almost collapsing into the floor with all the pain her heart was feeling now.

Spencer stood there without knowing what to do.

He broke her heart.

[homelander-rp-blog]

"ah I don't know about all ladies" he chuckles softly "tonight I'm only looking for impressing just one lady alone" his eyes not leaving Lucy's face as a fond smile forms on his lips, he brings a hand up to gently caress on her elbow, letting his hand stays, he boldly trails it up until his fingers graces the skin over her bare shoulder, moving his thumb back and forth, his blue eyes twinkling bright with mischievous shine to them "want to try something?" his voice light and breathless, like they both are teenagers in a prom party and he's asking for a dance from his old crush but he swears he can hear his heart beat in his ear. In one swift move he scoops her up between his arms, careful not to spill the drink in her glass, careful not to put much pressure on her because she's a mere human.. fragile and delicate like a rose flower and will break under his super strength, doesn't matter how excited he is, he has to be cautious with Lucy. The other guests standing in the balcony gasp and some of them pull out their phone to take picture while smiling, it's like a very sweet move to have Homelander carry you around while flying and Lucy is the first woman Homelander wants to be seen with in public. no.. no she isn't like Maeve, she's.. she's different. I really like her. a deep part inside him hopes Lucy likes him as much as he does, he doesn't want to lose her because she was afraid to be all over the media with Homelander.. "hold tight, miss!" it's his only warning before he hovers up in the air, slightly tightens his hold around her, not too uncomfortable but just to make sure she won't fall if she thrashes from the sudden surprise. "you're safe with me, don't worry!" he rushes to tell her and smiles when seeing her reaction, slowly, he turns and navigates his way through the air toward the city, just flying above it for now and watching lights like little stars shining underneath them, a pleasant breeze playing with their hair and God.. she looks so beautiful like this, up here with only two of us.. it feels so intimate and John thinks it's okay if she says no to my offer.. I just want to be with her. He lands above the highest skyscraper, the only source of light here is a red light, warning airplanes and the moonlight, illuminating around them like he's in a dream.. He's still holding her hand when he sets her down "careful!" and looks pointedly toward the edge, the wind gets aggressive this high up and he doesn't want her to... to.. fall. He moves closer and God, why her eyes are so beautful and round? like a baby deer.. "I'll catch you if you fall, don't worry when you're with me, Lucy"

"Well we are at a work function," she jokd lightly, taking a drink.

A shiver ran through her with his touch. A chill crawled up her spine. She suddenly felt unsure of his interest in her, the air growing thick around them. While she'd hoped it had only been her good looks and personality he was interested in, it soon became apparent she had been a fool to think Homelander hadn't had an ulterior motive for inviting her along to the soiree.

Then there it was.

Her father.

Of course he would have recognized her name. "I don't really know," she admitted freely, purposefully avoiding his gaze. She feigned interest in the view of the city. "He kept a lot of his work from us," she added truthfully, taking another drink - a fact she'd only recently found out since his disappearance.

Lucy's gaze finally found his once more when he pulled her closer. The air seemed to be vacating her lungs as the space between them disappeared. Everything around them seemed to fade to nothing until it was just the two of them.

"I don't -- That's not --" she cut off her own words as he continued, gently shaking her head.

When she'd taken the job at Vought it hadn't been with the intention of climbing the corporate ladder - even though the name Maclean held weight there. Nor had she wanted access to some super army. She'd only been trying to find her father and what better place to start than where he hid the most. Althought she knew Homelander was unpredicatable, ruthless, and dangerously ambitious, she never expected him to use her for his nefarious deeds.

Before she could process his offer however, he effortlessly returned to their initial flirtation. "Oh, uh, you know. Just normal complaining about upper management," she said with a nervous, soft chuckle.

Dangerous as it may have been to deny his offer of promotion, she felt somewhat safe being in a crowded room of their colleagues. She took one last drink of her champagne, finishing it off. She needed all the liquid courage she could muster.

"Um, no, I haven't," she continued after swallowing thickly, pushing a smile to her face. "But if it is anything like this, then I'm sure it is beautiful. I bet you get to see it a lot since you can..." she added with one more light laugh, gesturing to his ability to fly. "And I would also risk a wager that it impresses all the ladies," she went on, letting her smirk soften.

[parkerslatte]

Things We Bury [Chapter Twelve]

Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 5.4k

Part Summary: Y/N was abducted by Iain and Spencer does everything to find her.

Warnings: slight torture, injury

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A/N: This is the second to last part and I'm getting emotional that this series is ending soon. I'm actually proud that it's my first series that I have (nearly) completed and I love it. But I can't wait to move onto all the other series I have planned :)

***

CHAPTER TWELVE: ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING

When Spencer’s phone began ringing, all attention turned to him. They were in the middle of working on a case; five women have gone missing over the last three months and the BAU were now called to inspect it. Spencer fished through his pocket until his hand came in contact with his phone. Normally if his phone rang while they were working a case, he would hang up instantly, however once he saw Y/N’s name on the screen, he excused himself. 

Spencer was confused, Y/N was on a date so why would she be calling him unless it was an accident. Once he stepped out of the round table room, Spencer answered the call.

“Y/N?” He questioned.

“Hey mom!” Y/N said, happily, “I forgot to wish you a happy birthday earlier, I was just busy and it completely slipped my mind.” 

Spencer was confused, “Y/N, did you phone the right number?”

“Of course I did,” She said, “How could I ever forget your favourite?”

“Y/N, are you alone?” Spencer asked, his concern growing.

“No, I don’t think Chris will be able to make it, he’ll probably be out on his date.” Y/N said.

Spencer felt his heart drop slightly, “Y/N are you with your date?” Spencer said, by now his entire tone was full of concern and worry. He began to pace slightly, waiting for a response. 

“Yeah I think that’s probably a good idea.” Y/N said.

“Are you safe?” Spencer questioned. By now his heart was beating out of his chest, he wanted her to be safe because if she wasn’t he would stop at nothing to make sure she was.

There was a small pause on Y/N’s end before her reply came through. During that pause, Spencer could hear the soft sounds of her breathing and the sound of the car she was most likely sat in.

“I don’t think so, dad said that it wouldn’t be ready by then.” Y/N responded.

“Do you know where you are?” Spencer questioned.

“Not exactly.” Y/N responded and her voice was less confident than before. Over the phone he heard shuffling before her voice sounded out again, “I’ve got to go now,” she said, “I love you.”

“Y/N! Wait-”

Y/N hung up the phone before Spencer could say anything else. He remained standing in the same position, his phone still pressed against his ear. Spencer didn’t know how long he was standing there for until someone placed their hand on his back. 

“Reid,” Derek said, “You okay?”

Spencer turned to face Derek. His face was still one of shock and deep concern and his eyes were glossy with tears. Derek’s eyebrows furrowed together at the sight of Spencer.

“What happened?” 

“It was Y/N- she, um, she called me,” Spencer said, his voice cracking, “She’s in danger.”

“She’s in danger,” Spencer said, more clear than before, “She was meant to be going on a date tonight and I think they’ve taken her.”

“Taken her where?” Derek questioned.

“I don’t know,” Spencer said, letting a tear fall down his cheek, “All I know is that I need to find her before…” Spencer took a deep breath, “I need to find her before this ends up like it did with Maeve.”

“Alright,” Derek said with sympathy, “We can have Garcia track her phone.” He placed a hand on Spencer’s shoulder and led him  back into the round table room.

When they both stepped back through the door, all eyes were on Spencer once again. This time they were all looks of concern about how distressed Spencer looked. 

“Spence, you okay?” JJ questioned.

Spencer shook his head, “No, it’s Y/N. I think she’s been taken.”

“How do you know this?” Hotch questioned.

“Y/N had a date tonight and she just called me and she called me and she sounded...off,” Spencer explained, “She called saying happy birthday to her mom, I thought she had the wrong number until she said that she hadn’t. I asked her if she was safe and she said no. She doesn’t know where she is. Hotch, I need to find her.”

“Oh my poor girl.” Penelope piped up. 

“Garcia, can you track Y/N’s phone?” Hotch asked. 

Penelope nodded and Spencer felt himself zone out. If only he had told her how he actually felt the night previous she might have cancelled the date, none of this would’ve ever happened. He could only think of what was happening to Y/N at that moment, he didn’t want to think of it but he couldn’t help himself. She could already be dead for all he knew. 

“Got it!” Penelope piped up. 

“Okay, Reid and Morgan can go,” Hotch said before turning to Spencer, “Only if you’re feeling up to it.

“I’m feeling up to it.” Spencer replied. 

***

Y/N groaned as she finally gained consciousness, her head was pounding in her skull. Her body still felt weak and exhausted. Opening her eyes, Y/N stared at the ceiling of what looked like an abandoned warehouse. Y/N tried to move her body but found that she couldn’t, something was stopping her. Looking up as much as she could, Y/N saw that she was restrained to a cold metal table. 

Shuffling around, Y/N tried to move however the restraints remained in place. She let her head fall back to the table and sighed. If only she hadn’t gone out on this date, she wouldn’t be in this situation. Trying to move again, Y/N moved her arms in the restraints. They dug into her wrists though she didn’t care, all she cared about was getting out of the warehouse and going home to Spencer. 

“It’s no use Y/N,” Iain said walking into view, “I made sure you can’t escape them.”

“Why are you doing this?” Y/N asked, pure hatred in her voice. 

“I just wanted your attention and you never gave it to me.” Iain said, crouching down so his face was right next to hers. Y/N turned her face away to stare up at the ceiling, not wanting to even look at Iain. 

“When I bumped into you outside that cafe, I knew that I needed to have you,” Iain explained, “I did loads of things to try and gain your attention, I stopped by your cafe multiple times but you never gave me a second glance, just a quick smile before you moved onto the next customer.”

“That’s how a business works,” Y/N said, gritting her teeth, “I serve you and you move along. I’m not going to stand there and talk with a customer endlessly while there are others in line.”

“But what about Dr, Spencer Reid,” Iain said, “You always have time for him.” Y/N went silent. “I struck a nerve there didn’t I? Mentioning Dr. Reid.” 

Y/N remained silent while Iain continued to speak, “I saw the relationship you two had so I knew I had to do something else to gain your attention,” He spoke, “I began to come in more regularly but that was when you decided to hire more people and you were never working.”

“The cafe was getting too hectic, I had to hire new people.” Y/N said. 

“But you should’ve been working there with them, not galavanting around, clinging onto Spencer Reid at any given chance!” Iain raised his voice, causing Y/N to flinch. 

“Is this what this is about? You were jealous of mine and Spencer’s friendship?” Y/N questioned.

“You and I both know that it is a lot more than friendship going on,” Iain said, “Like what happened between you and him at his apartment only last night.”

“What?” Y/N asked, shocked, “You were spying on us?”

“I’ve been spying on you for a long time Y/N,” Iain said, “I know everything about you,” He reached his hand up to gently caress her face. Y/N tried to move away but there was only so far she could go.

“Don’t touch me!” Y/N snapped.

Iain acted like he hadn't heard her and continued to talk while gently caressing her face. Y/N felt like she could throw up at the feel of his skin on hers. 

“I knew I had to do something to get your attention, that’s why I began to kidnap and kill those women. And they looked exactly like you.”

Y/N felt sick to her stomach, “You killed them?”

Iain nodded, “Yes I did.” He was oddly calm, this only caused Y/N to feel even sicker. 

“You killed them because you wanted my attention?” Y/N questioned, turning her head to face him for the first time since the conversation started. 

“You wouldn’t give me attention any other way.” Iain said.

“How about actually talking to me like a normal functioning human being? Not a psychotic lunatic-”

Y/N suddenly felt a searing pain in her cheek as she was struck in the face by Iain’s hand. Her head snapped to the left so she faced the wall. The lighting was dim, so Y/N wasn’t able to see much. The only thing she could see on the other side of the room was a large metal table that had different knives and other objects that would cause severe bodily harm on top of it. 

Iain stood up to his full height and towered over Y/N, “I knew I could never have you while Spencer Reid was in your life, so this is the next best thing.”

***

The closer Spencer and Derek got to the location where Y/N’s phone was, the more agitated and nervous Spencer was getting. The more they drove, the further they were from the city and they were surrounded by nothing but trees. Spencer’s foot bounced up and down as he tried to keep everything bottled up inside. He needed to find Y/N, if something happened to her, Spencer wouldn’t know what to do. He knew he loved her, more than he ever loved Maeve. From his reaction to Maeve’s death, he couldn’t begin to imagine what he would do if he lost Y/N. 

“Reid, you can talk to me about this,” Derek said, breaking the silence that had ensued ever since they both sat in the car, “You don’t have to keep everything bottled up.”

Spencer sighed, “I’m not, I just want to find Y/N.” 

“I know and I do too, but you can talk to me about how you feel, you don’t have to suffer in silence.”

“I love her,” Spencer admitted, “I need to find her and tell her that, I’m not letting this end up like Maeve.”

“It won’t get to that point Reid, we will find her.” Derek said.

Spencer looked out the windshield before his eyes widened, “Stop!”

Derek abruptly slammed on the breaks causing the car to come to a screeching halt. Immediately Spencer jumped out of the car and lightly jogged over to the abandoned car that was pulled over on the side of the road. Spencer looked around before his eyes came across a bag on the floor, it’s contents scattered across the road. It was Y/N’s bag. 

Spencer continued to look in the car. Both doors were wide open meaning that Y/N had somehow escaped and her date had run after her or her date stopped here and took her somewhere else. Looking inside the car, Spencer’s heart dropped once he saw that there were small drops of blood scattered in the car. All of his thoughts were immediately put to ease when he came across Y/N’s bloodied keys, meaning that she had stabbed her date and had gotten away.

“She could have gotten away or her date might still have her, we can’t know for sure,” Derek said, “But what we do know for sure is that this is definitely the work of the guy we’ve been looking for. Everything matches, the family said that their daughters were going on a date and they never came back.” Derek said, examining the car further while Spencer continued to stand there. 

“We should get back to the BAU and tell Hotch what we found, we can get a search party here, if Y/N did escape then she and the unsub haven’t gotten far since that phone call.” Derek finally turned back to Spencer who remained in the same position looking into the car, “You okay, Reid?”

“I need to go to Y/N’s cafe, there’s a possibility that Hazel or Patrick know who Y/N was going on a date with.” Spencer said, walking back to the SUV. 

“Who’s Hazel and Patrick?” Derek questioned, following behind Spencer. 

“Her coworkers.” Spencer answered, climbing back into the car. 

***

Y/N didn’t know how long she was laid on the table for. Her concept of time had completely gone out the window. Occasionally Iain would come back into the room and mock Y/N and get too close to her, making her extremely uncomfortable. Of course, she only hoped that Spencer and the rest of his team would find her and lock Iain up for good. 

Y/N heard the sound of Iain’s footsteps once again, causing her to tense up. He had left her alone for a while now and she hadn’t heard anything from him. Once again, Y/N began to struggle against her restraints, she heard Iain tut.

“Y/N you know that’s no use,” He spoke as he approached Y/N and hovered over her, “You can’t go anywhere.”

“I like to at least try,” Y/N said as she continued to struggle, “I don’t plan on being here for long.”

“You believe that Spencer will come and save you?” Iain stated, walking to the other side of the room.

“He will come to save me, his whole team will and I can’t wait until you’re put in handcuffs and locked up so you’ll never do anything like this again.” Y/N said, gritting her teeth.

Iain chuckled slightly, approaching Y/N once again and leant over her to whisper in her ear, “That’s a plan, or I could kill you before they even find out where you are.”

Iain stood up again and held a small knife over Y/N’s body so she could see it. He gently began to move the blade up and down her arms and across her collarbone. Y/N tried not to show any fear but her eyes said it all. Y/N was scared to die, she was scared she would never see her family again, she was scared that she will never get to live her life. Y/N was scared that she would never see Spencer again. 

“They’ll find me,” Y/N said, a single tear falling from her eye, “They’ll find me.”

“If you say so.” Iain said before slicing Y/N’s skin across her collarbone, making her scream out in pain. 

***

Once Spencer and Derek got back to the BAU, they explained all of their findings to Hotch and the rest of the team. Spencer nearly felt his heart drop when a picture of Y/N was added to their investigation board. Funnily enough the picture that was up on the board was one Spencer took of Y/N only several months ago. 

“Spencer you seriously need to upgrade your phone.” Y/N said as she handed it over to him. 

“Why?” Spencer said frowning, “I like my phone.”

“You may like it but if you upgrade it to modern technology, you can do a lot more on it than call and text, you can play games on it, take photos that are of semi decent quality,” Y/N said, “And overall it would make your life so much easier.”

“I don’t need a new one,” Spencer said, “I’m perfectly content with the one I already have.”

Y/N sighed, “Then I guess I shouldn’t have gotten this?”

Spencer frowned in confusion as Y/N stood up from the couch and circled around it to collect something out of her bag. Turning his head to find out what she was doing, Spencer’s eyes widened when he realised what Y/N had in her hands. A new phone.

“I know you said you didn’t want anything for your birthday and not to make a huge fuss over it but I couldn’t help but get you something.” Y/N stood behind the couch as she handed it to him.

“Y/N I can’t accept this.” Spencer said, trying to hand it back.

“You are,” Y/N said, “I already have a phone so I’m not going to use it.”

Spencer sighed and let his head flop back against the couch, looking up at Y/N, “Thank you.”

Y/N leaned down and pressed a quick kiss to his forehead, doing it completely on impulse due to her flustered reaction afterwards. Spencer lifted his head back up from the couch, a slight red tinge to his face, and watched as Y/N circled around the couch. 

She sat down next to him and helped him set up the phone, Spencer only watched as she did with a smile on his face. Everything she said about the different functions of the phone went on one ear and out the other. He was distracted, she was so animated and he couldn’t help but admire her. He only paid attention when she began talking about the camera.

Taking the phone out of her hand, she pointed the camera to her. 

“What are you doing?” She questioned, a smile growing on her features. 

“Taking a picture.” Spencer responded. 

Y/N only smiled as Spencer took the picture. After it was taken Spencer smiled down at it with pure adoration in his eyes. The next day at work he asked Penelope how to change the background on the phone.

“Spence!” JJ said, shaking Spencer’s shoulder. 

He snapped out of the daze he was in and turned to her, “What?”

“Are you ready to go?” JJ asked softly. 

“Yeah I’m ready.” Spencer said before turning back to the picture on the board one last time.

JJ noticed this and placed a hand on his shoulder gently, “We’ll find her Spence.” Spencer only nodded before heading out of the room with JJ ready to go to Y/N’s cafe. 

Once they got there, Hazel was ready to lock up. The lights were off and she was standing outside the cafe, keys fumbling in her hands. Spencer and JJ approached her.

“Hazel.” Spencer said, making her stop fumbling with the keys to look at him.

“Spencer, hey,” She greeted, “Y/N’s not here if you’re looking for her. She’s on a date.”

“She’s not on a date,” JJ spoke up, flashing her FBI badge, “We have reason to believe she has been abducted by the same person who’s been abducting women for the last three months.”

“What?” Hazel said, almost dropping her keys, “Y/N’s been abducted?”

“It seems like it,” Spencer said, his voice close to cracking, “Did you know anything about the man she was going on a date with?”

Hazel nodded, opening up the cafe letting both Spencer and JJ inside, “He’s been in here a lot.” Hazel said.

“Was he in here a lot when Y/N was?” JJ questioned. 

“No,” Hazel answered, “He came in normally when Y/N was on her day off or had a later shift, but whenever he came in he did ask where Y/N was. I just thought he was interested in her.”

“Did he begin to ask weird questions?” JJ asked.

Hazel thought for a second, “There weren’t any questions that were weird. He pretty much only asked when Y/N would be working next. I couldn’t really answer that since Y/N has a habit of coming in when she’s not supposed to or asks one of us to cover shifts sometimes. Neither me nor Patrick minded since Y/N was always overworking herself.” She explained.

“Do you know the name of the man she was going on this date with?” Spencer questioned.

“I think his name was Iain.” Hazel answered.

“Hazel, do you have any security footage of Iain?” JJ questioned. 

Hazel nodded, “We have it all recorded. We have three cameras.”

“Can we see it all please? It’ll be the easiest way to ID him and get a last name.” Spencer answered. 

As Spencer and JJ reviewed all of the security footage, JJ couldn’t help but let her gaze cast over to Spencer every once in a while. Whenever Y/N showed up on the security footage, he clenched his hand into a fist. She felt for him, she really did. His first love was killed in front of him and there is a possibility that the woman he had unintentionally fallen for could be next. 

Hazel stopped the footage and pointed out a man, “That’s Iain, the guy Y/N went on a date with.”

All Spencer wanted to do was punch a hole in the screen. He obviously didn’t do it for two reasons, one being that it was equipment that Y/N had spent money on and two being that he probably wasn’t strong enough and would only end up hurting himself. 

“Are you sure Hazel?” Spencer questioned.

“Positive.” 

***

The pain in Y/N’s collarbone had lessened but it still stung. After Iain had cut her collar bone, he thankfully placed the knife back down. That’s when Y/N thought it was all over but of course Iain had slapped her around a bit. Y/N was sure she would have bruises scattered over her body. 

Y/N was freezing cold and exhausted, every time her eyes closed she fought the urge to go to sleep. She didn’t want to give Iain the satisfaction of her passing out from the pain he had inflicted on her, because she knew that once she passed out there was a possibility that he would kill her. 

The restraints that held her arms and legs in place remained and there was no way to get out of them without someone else’s help. Y/N had found that out the hard way. While she was struggling to get out of the restraints, she had somehow twisted her arm at an awkward angle causing it to throb with pain. That injury was the only one Iain didn’t cause directly. 

Once Y/N heard the footsteps of Iain once again, she wanted to yell and scream at him but she kept it all bottled up inside. Iain pulled up a chair and sat where Y/N could easily view him. 

“If you wanted my attention, you could have spoken to me like a civilised person.” Y/N said calmly. 

“I tried that but you were too busy having eye sex with Dr. Reid,” Iain said, “And besides, where’s the fun in that.”

Y/N shook her head the best she could, “If you’re going to kill me just get it over with already, you’ve come in this room multiple times just to mock me.”

“I don’t want to kill you just yet,” Iain said, putting up his feet, “I’ll just wait until Dr. Reid is here to witness it. Isn’t that what happened last time? With his girlfriend Maeve?”

“How the hell do you know about that?” Y/N questioned. 

“I might’ve overheard a conversion you had with him before. Obviously this was all before you were even interested in him. I wasn’t going to do anything with that information, I would’ve even taken it to my grave, but now, why not torture him a bit.”

“You want to torture him just because you can’t have me?” Y/N said, “You would’ve never had me in the first place because if you ever thought I would of even gone out with you, you’re incredibly stupid.”

“You did agree to this wonderful date.” Iain stated.

“But I didn’t want to come,” Y/N said, “I only did because I didn’t want to upset you and feel bad about it.”

“You know what Y/N? You’re a really good person,” Iain said leaning forward, “Too bad that you’ll be dead soon enough.”

***

“His full name is Iain Montgomery,” Penelope started as she managed to get a positive Id on Iain, “He is thirty-five, currently unemployed but was a former surgeon. He quit three months ago.”

“That’s when the first woman was abducted.” Hotch stated. 

“That’s not all,” Penelope said, “There were numerous complaints of him acting strange toward women, and these women all look very similar to our Y/N.”

“He’s obsessed with her,” Derek stated, “All the women he abducted had a resemblance to Y/N as well.”

“Garcia, does he own any properties close to where Y/N phoned Reid from?” Rossi questioned.

“It doesn't look like it,” Penelope said, “But there is an abandoned warehouse a mile and a half from where Y/N’s belongings were found.

Everyone nodded as Penelope gave them the location. One by one they all headed out of the room. Spencer only had one thing on his mind and that was Y/N. They were going to save her and she was going to be okay. 

***

Y/N felt herself fighting the urge to fall asleep. Her whole body ached and she was exhausted. Iain was still sitting in the chair facing Y/N. He hadn’t moved the entire time and only watched, probably waiting for when Y/N eventually did pass out. 

Y/N knew she was strong enough to fight the urge to drift off to an unconscious state, but she was beginning to question that. Every time her eyes shut, she felt herself begin to drift off before she forced herself to open them again. 

“You can fall asleep you know.” Iain stated.

“I’m not going to.” Y/N mumbled.

“I’m not going to kill you if that’s what you’re worried about.” Iain said. 

“I’m not worried about that at all, I just want to know when Spencer, Derek, JJ, Hotch, Rossi and Alex come to arrest you.”

“They’re not going to find us anytime soon.” Iain said. 

Just after Iain said that, sirens were heard coming from outside. Y/N smirked despite her injuries, “Guess again bitch.”

Iain jumped up from his chair and ran over to the table where all the knives and weapons were. He picked up a gun before running out of the room without a second thought. Y/N sighed in relief. She was safe, Iain was going to get arrested and she was going to be okay. 

Y/N let her head fall back against the metal table and she let out a small laugh. Iain was going to get what he deserved. Shuffling was heard coming from the direction Iain had disappeared to. Y/N wanted to lift her head up to see who it was but she didn’t have the energy anymore. 

“Y/N!” JJ shouted, rushing over to the table.

“JJ?” Y/N said, closing her eyes. 

“Y/N, keep your eyes open.” JJ said.

“I’m fine,” Y/N said, “If I pass out I think it’ll be a good thing. I’m too exhausted to move.”

“You’re safe now.” JJ said, working on the restraints that were around Y/N’s legs.

“I know,” Y/N said breathlessly, “I know. You’re all here now so I know I’m safe.”

Closing her eyes, Y/N felt herself drift off into an unconscious state, knowing that she was around people she trusted.

***

When Y/N awoke, she no longer felt the cold metal of the table, nor did she feel the restraints keeping her body to said table. The only things she felt was the feeling of a bed underneath her body, a pillow under her head and a warm hand in hers. Opening her eyes, Y/N looked around the hospital room she was in. Spencer was sitting in a chair, head resting on the side of the bed. His fingers entwined with hers. 

Y/N looked down at her chest where there was a bandage placed over the cut Iain had given her on her collarbone. It didn’t sting anymore, in fact she didn’t feel anything at all. The only thing she really felt was Spencer’s hand in hers. 

Squeezing his hand, Y/N chuckled as his head snapped up from the bed. At first he looked confused but once he noticed that Y/N was away, a wide grin broke out on his face. 

“You’re okay.” Spencer said, gripping onto her hand a little tighter. 

“Thanks to you and the rest of the team.” Y/N states. 

Spencer only moved Y/N’s hand closer to him so he could press a kiss to her knuckles. Y/N smiled before she removed her hand from his and caressed his cheek briefly. 

“I’m so glad you’re okay,” Spencer said, “After you phoned me all I could think of was the worst possible outcome.”

“Well that outcome never came to pass because I’m here with you.” Y/N siad, her thumb lightly brushing his lips before she held his hand once again. 

“Did you get him?” Y/N questioned, “Iain?”

Spencer went silent for a moment, “Not exactly.”

Y/N tensed up, “What do you mean not exactly?”

“Don’t worry,” Spencer said, pressing his lips to her hand again, “He can’t do anything to harm you or anyone else again,” Spencer sighed, “We managed to corner him while he was escaping, there was no way he was going to let himself get caught. He shot himself in the head.”

“So he’s dead?” Y/N said and Spencer nodded. 

Y/N sighed, “Good, I know I shouldn’t wish death upon anyone, but after what he did to all those women and me, I’m glad he can’t do it to anyone else.”

“You’re safe now.” Spencer responded, his thumb rubbing the back of her hand. 

Y/N gave him a small smile before looking down, “I just can’t believe that the reason those other women were killed was because of me.”

“Hey,” Spencer said, causing Y/N to look up to him, “Don’t think like that alright?” Spencer shuffled so he was sat on the edge of her bed. He placed a hand on her cheek and his thumb brushed over her cheekbone, “You didn’t get those women killed, you had nothing to do with it.”

“But they looked like me, the only reason why Iain killed them was because he couldn’t have me.” Y/N said. 

“I know,” Spencer said softly, “But you can’t keep thinking like that, you can’t keep feeling guilty over something you had no control over.”

Y/N sighed before leaning into Spencer’s hand slightly and pressed a kiss to his palm. Spencer smiled sweetly down at her. 

“I’m so glad you’re okay.” Spencer mumbled.

“As you’ve said.” Y/N smiled.

“No seriously,” Spencer said, “I don’t know what I would’ve done if we couldn’t find you or if-”

Spencer stopped speaking as he felt himself getting choked up. 

Despite the ache in her body, Y/N sat up and wrapped her arms around Spencer. Spencer’s arms snaked around her waist gently as he buried his face in her neck. Y/N held the back of his head as her fingers gently ran through the curls on the top of his head. 

“Spencer I’m here and I’m safe.” Y/N mumbled. 

They both pulled away from the hug before they pressed their foreheads together. Neither of them said anything but both of them understood what the other wanted to say. They both found the words hard to say, especially to one another. 

“Y/N, I-”

“There she is!” Penelope said as she walked into the room. Spencer and Y/N pulled away from each other and he sat back down on the seat, taking her hand in his once again. 

“I was so worried about you,” Penelope said, “But you’re okay now.”

“I’m okay Penelope.” Y/N chuckled. 

“Good, good,” She said, “I brought you an array of snacks. They have to keep you in the hospital until tomorrow to make sure everything is okay but I wanted to make sure that you’re well fed for tonight.”

“Thank you Penelope.” Y/N said. 

“You’re welcome.” She responded. 

After Penelope left, Spencer and Y/N were left alone in the hospital room once again. The mood they had created was completely gone but neither of the two minded. They both knew that there was another time they could talk about it. For now, all that mattered was that Y/N was safe. Holding tightly onto her hand, Spencer stayed by her side the entire duration she was in the hospital room.

----------

PERMANENT SPENCER REID TAGLIST

@spenxerslut  @averyhotchner @drayshadow @moviequeen51 @spencer-reid-am-i-right @ssavanessa22 @amurderofcrowsinatrenchcoat @mbjackie @jklemps @reformedmoneyshovel @nomajdetective @jesuisbenny @jooniehomie @spencerreid-187 @onyourfingertips @uhuhuh @rubyhi208-42 @archer561 @c0rpsecore @sweetandsunny @zoeygraygubler @algonsa @jswessie187 @shemarmooresfedora @kaz-2y567 @alfonsais @aikrus @nani-2305 @death-becomes-her  @sarejane  @isabelle-558  @measure-in-pain @the-nerd-gang @manuosorioh @luredwithpretzels @ceeellewrites @totallyclearwitch @jekkles @this-is-doctor-and-its-calm​ @sarahpaulsonlov3r​ @periwinklemax

SERIES TAGLIST

@findmedontlooseme @thatsonezesty13 @papapasta-187 @rathersuspiciousbumblebee @sleepretreat @bunnyhoplollipop @thebasassbitchqueen @sparklykeylime @ickleronniekinsemotionalrange  ​@werewolfbanshee-love @its-9pm @morks-watermelon ​ @reidsfish ​​ @allybatch  ​​@stacie-marie-bloom

[jaedore]

𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐨𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭 | 𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐫

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: jaehyun x reader

𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: mythology!au, angst, romance

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: swearing, suggestive (just making out lol), mentions of alcohol, violence (mentions of choking)

𝐚/𝐧: if you are uncomfortable with these themes then i highly suggest you no longer interact! also, thoughts/emphasis are italicized. I'll just put the header on when I have the patience bc I felt like this is long overdue

[4.5k words]

You woke up finding your body was stiff and sore. It overpowered the pain in your wounded knees that stung with every movement of your limbs. Yesterday seemed like days ago, it felt like a fever dream. No, a nightmare. All you wanted to do was just curl up in bed, but then you remembered that your mother and you were having dinner at Jaehyun’s place. You’ve never gone to the Underworld, you didn’t hear many good things about it and that terrified you. What if Cerberus ate you? What if a wandering, lost soul stole your soul? The questions were endless and it sent you down a spiral of nervousness.

“Y/n?” Your mother softly came in, an apron hung around her neck and the aroma of breakfast food seeped into your room.

“Morning, mom,” you croaked.

“How are you feeling?”

Your mind flashed back to yesterday; Jaehyun in your room, tending your wounds, being flirtatious, or whatever. You remembered it as clear as the Fountain of Youth.

“I’m fine,” you answered, swiping the sheets away from your body to peer at the wounds.

You gently peeled back the bandage a bit only to see that the wound was almost gone. It held a faint discoloration as it was in the process of healing, but you were impressed nonetheless.

“So,” your mother began as she sat on the edge of your bed, “tonight, I was thinking about bringing a pasta dish. Or should we bring a cake? A pie maybe?”

“We can just pick up a pie from the bakery,” you brushed your hand in the air, dismissing any ideas, “it’ll be easier anyways.”

“Ah, yes. Hades does like his spicy chocolate pies,” your mother hums as she smoothes her palm against your bedsheet.

“Ugh, I don’t know how he eats that stuff,” you grumble, swinging your legs off your bed.

“Well, he is the God of the Underworld,” she raises both of her eyebrows at you, “so, what will you be doing today? It’s super nice out.”

Peering at your window, the sun shines brightly in the sky. The sky is bare of clouds and it does seem like a beautiful day today. You can imagine yourself sitting in the grass with a book in your palms. But you had more important things to do today, like beating the shit out of Maeve.

Your shoulders slump as you reply, “I’m going to go train with Mark.”

“You’re always training with that boy,” she narrows her eyes at you, “are you in love with him?”

“Mother!” You raise your voice, snapping your head to her, “No, I am not.”

Athena only laughs at your reply as she gets up and makes her way out of your room.

“Hey, Y/n?” her voice stops you before you step into the bathroom.

“Yes, mom?”

“You know you can tell me anything right?” she asks, her voice sweet and loving.

You nodded, recalling the things that happened last night at the beach. You haven’t told her and she must be worried, but you’re too drained and confused to spill it. So you spare her a small smile as you walk into the bathroom, not saying a word about what happened.

--

“Come on! You can hit harder!”

Annoyed at Mark’s ‘words of encouragement’, you purse your lips as you attempt to hit the boxing pad with your mitts. You were beginning to get tired, your arms burned from the repetitive movements and your knees ached as it chased after your feet. Mark hasn’t given you a break since you’ve gotten here and it’s almost been an hour of constant hitting.

Growing frustrated, you shouted in protest, “I’m done!” you throw your mitts on the dirt.

Mark sighs, seeing the frustration in your eyes, “Okay, what’s really going on?”

You exhale a short breath, “Nothing you’d be interested in,” you answer him sharply as you walk towards one of the rocks to sit on. Mark follows you closely, but quietly afraid to set off the fuming bomb of anger you always held.

“You know,” he starts, “I’ve heard a lot of mysterious things about you,” he plops right next to you.

You curl your legs up to your chest as you stare forward at the waterfall, “Like what?” you mumble, really not interested in what he’s heard because it’s all been bad stuff.

“You tell me,” Mark shrugs.

You tighten your hold on your legs, “I think someone’s out to get me,” you whisper.

Mark leans in to hear you clearer, “Maeve?” he whispers back.

You shudder, her name bringing back awful memories, “Yeah, but I’m not sure why. I have nothing that has to do with her. Sure, I provoked her on the first day, but...it wasn’t severe to draw it out this far.”

Mark’s eyebrows furrow, “What do you mean?”

You explained what happened last night at the beach party. You quivered as you retold the story from your perspective. It was a vivid nightmare that you didn’t know how to wake.

“Where is Lucas now?” Mark asked.

You fumed at the male’s name. He hasn’t texted or called you since last night. He would be the key to all of your answers, but he wouldn’t answer any of your messages or calls. Lucas was friendly, always nice, and shined bright like the sun. You just wondered what he was up to.

“I don’t know,” you sighed, picking up the mitts from the ground, “come on. We came here to train. Plus, I want to forget it all.”

Mark quickly jumps to his feet, “do you think this has anything to do with the feud between Hades, your mother, and her’s?”

You tilted your head to the side, “What feud?”

Mark smirked, “Guess you don’t know then.”

“Mark,” you lowered your voice when he dismissed your question, “what. Feud?”

“I’ll tell you if you can beat me,” he said, picking up the other pair of mitts that laid on the ground.

--

Storming into your house, you shouted, “Why didn’t you tell me about the feud you had with Hades and Eris?”

Taken aback, she looked at you with wide eyes, almost dropping the spoon she held, “w-what are you talking about?”

You inhaled, “Why didn’t you tell me that after the Titan War, Hades, and apparently Zeus, imprisoned Eris in Tartarus? And that you were helping them and now she’s after me, possibly because of it?”

“Who told you that?” your mother calmly put down the spoon and rubbed her palms on her thighs.

“Does that really matter right now, mom?” your voice rose in anger.

“Sit down,” she wipes her hand on a napkin, discarding it as she walks towards you, who begins to be seated at the dinner table.

“Eris and I were good friends, we trained together as kids. She was good, almost better than me, but there was always the tension of competition between us. One could only be good in the eyes of Zeus so we grew up and trained with that mindset. As we got older, we were still good friends, but there was always that silent tension between us. When the Titan war came to be, Eris rebelled and fought against us,” your mother sighed, anguish tainting the streaks of her face, “I tried everything in my power to persuade her to fight with us, to be on our side, but that’s when she said all of the things that were never said. That I was the favorite, I was the best only because I was the favorite, I was only fighting along Zeus because he favored me more than her. Not because I was good or tactful, she disregarded our training together...our friendship, the bond that we had growing up. It was stupid really, but eventually, we beat their army and imprisoned her. According to Zeus, she did more damage during the war that I wasn’t aware of. That’s why she’s imprisoned in Tartarus. I haven’t asked because she’s...she’s dead to me really.”

You leaned back in her seat, realizing that Maeve probably was only acting out of feeling because of the relationship between both of your mothers. Her mother was imprisoned in the deep abyss below the Underworld, while yours lived a perfect, rewarding life.

“Is that why we’re going to the Underworld tonight? To talk to Zeus?” you quietly asked.

Your mother nodded, “I know I should’ve told you. I’m sorry. I just didn’t think of the possibilities of her coming for you through her daughter because of me.”

You shook your head, “It’s fine. I just want this to stop,” your fingertips brushed against your neck.

“Well,” your mother sighed, peering at her watch, “you don’t really have time to get ready, so why don’t you rinse your face from the sweat, and then we’ll pick up the pie and head on down.”

Head on down. You whimpered as you stood up. And it wasn’t because of your sore legs.

As you washed your face, you wondered if Jaehyun would be eating with you guys. You recall that Hades said Jaehyun was always at the Mourning Fields talking to the souls that wandered there. There, holds the souls that wasted their souls on unrequited love. Does Jaehyun love someone? Or does he not? Then you remembered how he took up space in your room last night. His fingertips sent icicle daggers through your skin that you felt their phantom as you wiped your face on the nearby towel. With the hopes of Jaehyun not speaking to you tonight, you braced yourself on the journey of walking down into the Underworld.

--

You jumped back at the sound of barking. Cerberus. The three-headed dog barks at both you and your mother. No matter how powerful your mother, Athena, was, she had no power over a creature created to guard the gates of the Underworld.

“Why isn’t he coming? I rang the doorbell like five minutes ago,” your mother grumbled.

As if on cue, the gates opened and the growling sounds of Cerberus silenced in question.

“They are not the enemy or the dead, Cerberus. They’re our guests.” a voice rang above you. You found out later that the voice belonged to Hades, but you saw Jaehyun stepping out from behind the black, iron gates.

“Good evening, sorry for the wait.” Jaehyun bowed to you both.

Your mother paused, regretting the comment she made before as she saw how handsome Jaehyun was, “You’re Jaehyun, right? You grew up so well.”

“Thank you, ma’am.”

Tch “ma’am”. As if you actually had manners. You rolled your eyes at his sense of poise. You wonder where he learned such acts in a short amount of time.

Your mother nudged you, “do you have anything to say?” she whispered.

You inhaled a sharp breath, narrowing your eyes at the prideful male in front of you, “Thank you for having us,” you mumbled, barely nodding to him.

“Please, this way.”

Jaehyun led your mother and you towards Hades’ Palace, the stone tower tall enough to peek through the rising fog of the evening. Across the path to the left stood the Judgement Pavilion. Several souls lined up waiting for their next home where they’d be trapped forever. One of the souls snapped their eyes to you as if they knew where you stood, who you were. Their eyes were full of darkness and fury, almost consuming you into a tunnel of doom.

Jaehyun snatched your arm, his grip vice-like, “Don’t look at any soul who hasn’t been through the Judgement Pavilion, it’s their last chance to steal a living being’s soul before they’re judged into exile.” You hadn’t realized it but it was only you and Jaehyun who stood on the pavement that led you to Hades’ Palace.

You looked ahead not seeing her, “Where’s my mom?”

“She already went in. We didn’t even notice you were gone until she asked you something to only find you not behind us.”

You inhaled a sharp breath, “How long have I been standing here?”

“Around five minutes, you didn’t hear me call you?” Jaehyun’s eyebrows furrowed.

Shaking your head in denial you said, “No, I didn’t until you grabbed my arm,” you eyed down to your arm seeing that he still held you. Jaehyun’s grip loosened as he also realized that he hadn’t let go yet.

“Come on, let’s go,” his hand tightened around your arm once again as he dragged you towards the stone palace.

“I can walk myself,” you snapped at him, attempting to yank your arm from his clutch.

Jaehyun turned to you, his eyes cool and icy, sending chills down your spine, “I know,” he lowly said, “but I’m not taking my chances,” he gripped your arm again, leading you to his home.

The moonlight barely shined against the copper stone of his palace, creating sheer darkness looking like it hadn’t been touched for centuries. As unwelcoming as it felt, you could smell the complete opposite; a small scent of mint, the natural smell of tree bark, and the faintest feather of lavender. You glanced forward at Jaehyun, he hadn’t spared you look as you two made your way towards his home.

Jaehyun led you past the Asphodel Meadows, only tugging on your arm harder to bring your senses back. He was right to do so because looking at it was hypnotizing. You were even surprised that the ground-up dirt was able to grow flowers, and not knowing what kind they were, they were the most beautiful you’ve ever seen. The trees that sheltered them were bare of leaves and plants, creating a haunting aura, but it didn’t alarm you enough to look away.

“Come on,” Jaehyun tugged at you once again, this time gaining your attention.

You glared at him making you feel like some child that wasn’t able to concentrate. “What’s down there?”

He glanced back at you, mirroring your expression, “You don’t want to know.”

“Yes, I do.”

“No, you don’t. Now hush, we’re almost there.”

After a few more steps, you both came to face his home. The palace was bigger than you expected as it loomed over you. It felt like you were walking into your own exile.

“I thought you got lost,” your mother called to you as you walked in with Jaehyun behind you.

“She almost did,” he mumbled as he passed you to sit at the dinner table.

“She’s always been a curious one,” your mother laughed.

“That could get you in some serious trouble, girl,” Hades walked into the room with spoons in his hand. The high-pitched cackling sound of the spoon hitting the dishes made you wince, “come sit, it’s almost time to eat.”

Obeying Hades’ words, you idly sat next to Jaehyun with shame settling in your bones because you felt embarrassed that he had to drag your ass back to his place. The skin where his hands once grasped your arm felt tingly and you couldn’t burn it from your mind. It’s not like you and Jaehyun had many encounters, or rather, pleasant encounters, but you can’t help yourself but stare at him from the corner of your eye. Jaehyun sits with poise and pride, but you can see the burden he carries in the way he slightly slouches and the exhausted sigh that wriggles from his lips.

As everyone eats, you can’t help but think what Jaehyun’s thinking about. You can tell he’s thinking about something from the tension in his brow and the small pout coming from his bottom lip. From time to time, you ignore the small moments where his arm or leg brushes against yours or when you both reach for the same dish. And there’s a sort of tension over the table as everyone silently hides their comments as their food reaches their lips.

Hades is the first to speak, “So, I’ve heard you’ve had quite the events lately,” his tone low and cautious.

You clear your throat, “Um, yes.”

You begin to tell him everything that’s happened from the start of Maeve to the event in the Phantasms Forest. Not leaving out a single detail, you didn’t even notice your hands tensing up until you felt warmth from another on top of your chilled skin. Turning to your mother, she nods to you in comfort, letting you know that you’re doing well and you’re strong for facing what you’ve been through. Hades listens closely, not reaching for his food and feeling the slight disgust from those who caused you harm. Truth be told, he knew what was happening and why it was happening to you. Slightly nodding at your mother, they both lifted themselves from their seats and walked out the door leaving you and Jaehyun alone.

You turned to the male to your right, “Where are they going?”

Jaehyun shrugs, grabbing the nearby plates, “Probably to Tartarus.”

“What?” You snapped up on your legs, immediately following him to the kitchen sink, “Why?

“I’m sure you know that’s where they’re keeping Eris,” Jaehyun spares you a glance as he begins soaking a sponge in soap.

“Yeah,” you crossed your arms, “but why are they going down there? To talk to her? What is she going to do? What are they going to do? How long is this going to take?”

Tired of the overload from your questions, Jaehyun turns to you. Unbeknown that you were leaning forward towards him as you spoke, your eyes widened as you came face to face with the hot-headed male. His eyes were a pool of darkness with a hint of brown like melted dark chocolate. You stood in front of him with your feet glued to the ground. Heat radiated off your body as you parted your lips. Jaehyun’s eyes flickered down. He sharply inhaled to only let it out as he turned away and began scrubbing the dishes again.

“Bring the dishes to me and I’ll wash them,” he said before you could turn away from him.

You clutched the collar of your shirt. What was that? Your fingers trembled around a plate when you realized that he didn’t even answer any of your problems.

Setting them on the counter next to him, you snapped, “You didn’t even reply to my questions.”

“You talk too much.”

Stunned, you purse your lips and walk away. He can clean the kitchen by himself. You sat yourself in their living room, plopping yourself on the couch. If it weren’t for the dim lamp that flickered in the far corner of the room, you would’ve walked around blindly. The walls were painted in black, the rug was black, and even the couch you sat on was black. Everything was black like a fire had torn through the palace. The only color that caught your attention was the pictures that sat on top of the unlit fireplace. Making your way towards the photos, you found family photos of Jaehyun and his parents. It looked like a regular family you would suspect in the human world, a mother and father playing with their toddler son in the park. Except it wasn’t a park and it wasn’t a regular family. The field Jaehyun played on was the Field of Asphodel, but it was beautiful, there was greenery, grass, and beautiful flowers that bloomed around little Jaehyun. You wondered what happened to the breathtaking scenery. Your eyes landed on a particular picture that made the corners of your lips lift in the slightest. There, laid little Jaehyun sleeping peacefully in the embrace of Cerberus who also laid in slumber around the little boy, sheltering him from the rain that penetrated to the Underworld. Cute. The faint blur of a finger covered the corner of the picture, you wondered who took this photo. You thought that maybe it was his mother, Persephone, who no one’s heard of for years. The last thing you heard was that Hades kidnapped her after eating six pomegranate seeds and she was forced to live six months in the Underworld and six months in the mortal world, Earth. But she hasn’t returned from her six months on Earth. And it’s been 20 years.

“No, I don’t know where she is, nor do I really care,” Jaehyun said beside you.

Jumping, you didn’t even realize he was there. Holding your chest, you panted, “I didn’t even say anything this time.”

“I know,” he glanced at you, his gaze flickering back to your lips, then lower to your neck, “but you were thinking it.”

“I-”

“Come, I might have some ointment left for your neck,” Jaehyun doesn’t even give you a chance to protest.

Grabbing your wrist, you obediently follow him back into the kitchen.

“Sit,�� he commands.

You look around in question, “Where the hell am I going to sit?”

Jaehyun reached up to the upper cupboard, the bottom of his shirt slightly lifting with his shoulders to reveal his back, “on the counter, of course,” you averted your eyes somewhere else when he turned to face you, “unless you want to sit on my lap,” he smirks.

You shake your head, lifting yourself on the counter. Even if you sat on the counter, you were only tall enough to meet him at eye level. Snapping the cap open, the familiar smell of mint and ginger filled your nose as he dipped two fingers in the gooey substance. A very sinful scenario flashed across your mind as he pulled those fingers back out, his digits drenched in the healing fluid. Squeezing your legs together, you cleared your throat as he crept closer to you, but that only led to Jaehyun sliding his free hand around your nape to pull you closer.

“I don’t bite,” he whispers, that smirk returning.

“I didn’t ev-”

You tensed as Jaehyun’s fingertips brushed on your skin to apply the ointment. Both of your bodies were so close to each other, the only blockage being your knees that dug into this stiff abdomen. It also didn’t help that Jaehyun’s face was incredibly close to yours. With one movement, your lips would’ve met.

“Relax,” he whispers, his eyes switching up to meet yours.

Chills shoot down your spine, a sudden heat pooled at the bottom of your stomach at the breeze of his breath. But eventually, you relaxed. Until you felt his hand on your neck rubbing circles. He repeatedly dipped those long digits of his in the ointment and reapplied it to your neck. To be honest, you thought it looked fine, it was still sore and hurt in certain places but it felt like he was lathering you in it. Once in a while, you’d wince at the pressure Jaehyun’s fingertips pressed against some of the bruises.

“Sorry,” he’d murmur. You’d thin your lips but relax as soon as he apologizes, his voice sounding sincere and gentle.

Slightly turning to the side, you let out a troubled breath, sharply inhaling another, repeating those steps over again and again until Jaehyun slowly pulled away. His warm hand slipped from your nape and your breath trembled, the cold air settling on it as soon as he pulled away. You watched him set the ointment back where he got it from, not missing the flutter of his skin that revealed the slight muscles in his lower back. Oh boy, you sighed.

Jaehyun turned back to you, “You alright?”

You nodded, “Will it still be there by tomorrow?”

Jaehyun walked to you as you stayed glued to the counter, he hummed, “Considering that you almost met death twice in the span of two days, it’ll take a few days,” he was closer once again, “just be careful,” his voice in a low whisper.

You could feel his breath brisk your cheeks. You didn’t know if it was your own heat warming you up or the faint warmth of the words that escaped his plump lips. You felt his abdomen on the curl of your knees like before and there wasn’t a way to bring them closer because it’d reveal to him what you were thinking...or feeling. Maybe you weren’t thinking clearly, maybe you were just lonely. But the longer you stayed in front of him, your desire to kiss him grew. He’s been nothing but cold and mean, but he’s been so kind and taking care of you despite his spiteful aura. You sucked in your bottom lip, stopping whatever trembling words attempted to escape from the cage of your tongue.

You sucked in a sharp breath when Jaehyun’s hands slid to your waist.

“Don’t do that,” Jaehyun brought him closer to you, prying your legs open to create space for him.

You sucked in another sharp breath, “Do what?”

“You know exactly what you’re doing.”

Jaehyun seemed to be drawing closer to you, his gaze occasionally glancing at your lips as both of your breaths began to weigh down. Closing your eyes, you swore you felt his lips brush yours until you realized he wasn’t kissing you at all, but instead lifting you until you were back on your feet. With bodies still closer than the stars were to the moon, you tipped your head up to meet his gaze. Already looking at you, Jaehyun let out a heavy sigh.

You should’ve inhaled another breath because the next second, you found yourself against Jaehyun’s lips. Those lips that were so pink and so inviting met yours. It felt like Olympus was on pause and it was just you and him. No Maeve, no darkness, nothing. A heavy sensation of peace settled in the curve of your palms as you dragged them down his chest. You gasped when he bit your lip, sucking and, licking it for permission of entrance and you immediately complied, not giving it any thought at all. Those calloused hands of his wrapped around the small of your back, pulling you closer flush against his body, against his hips. Jaehyun’s tongue danced with yours, a gasp revering the way he held you close to him, the way with each stroke, you moaned enough to satisfy him. Until he pulled away.

With panting breaths and blinking eyes scattering across yours, you could see the panic in his eyes. You could see instant regret that pooled in the darkness of his eyes, yet you couldn’t help but inhale when he stepped away, the heat of his body replaced with his familiar coldness. Your eyes follow Jaehyun as he runs out of his home. Not saying anything to you, but leaving you alone in the darkness of his home. In the Underworld. Standing alone in his kitchen, you could hear the loud beating of your heart penetrating your ears, blocking the sound of droplets from the faucet, the hum of the house, and the confusion in your breath. Your fingers fly to your lips, the feeling burns yours like a scar. Was it something you said? Was it something you did? Gulping, you frantically searched the cupboards for a cup of water, thirst reaching your throat, but instead you found a section that opened up to bottles of whisky and wine.

Even better. Finding a drying cup in the sink, you poured yourself a glass of the bronze liquid, not caring for it’s age or make. You winced as the liquid scorched your throat, coughing at the slightly burning sensation that warmed your mouth, but anything was better than the searing feeling of his lips and the pain of when he pulled away.

[idkthisisjustforfanfic]

that makes four.

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PART 2

The first days of Harry staying at your house were overshadowed by Maeve’s 5th grade spelling bee victory. The fake gold medal was a mainstay around her neck for a new nights at the dinner table until she eventually forgot about it.

Luckily enough, neither of your daughters seemed to be thrown too off kilter by his presence. Maeve was just young enough to not know much about who Harry was or the band he’d been in--though she was ready and willing to brag about having a celebrity around.

CeCe--in true sibling rivalry fashion--decided to draw her own medal with crayons and ask you to cut it out so she could wear it around the house. If Maeve gets one, so do I.

With potholders on and the oven door open, you apologized. “I can’t right now, honey--give mommy a few minutes and I’ll help you.”

Harry materialized at the bottom of the stairs, eyebrows raised when he said: “What do you need, CeCe?”

“I have to cut this out!” She said excitedly, running over to the drawer where the scissors were kept. She whipped them out and turned around quickly, Harry’s eyes bulging out of his head when he hurried over to grab them from her.

“I’ll cut, you watch,” he laughed, exchanging a look with you when CeCe climbed up to sit at the island. She hummed in agreement, handed over the paper and watched as he lined it up to start snipping.

“CeCe,” he said her name inquisitively. “Is CeCe short for anything?”

“Cecilia Rose L/N,” she smiled. “Pretty, right?”

“Very pretty,” he smiled. “Same last name as your mum.”

The last part of his sentence was a statement, a quick glance in your direction when you turned off the oven and shouted towards the stairs. “Maeve! Dinner’s ready!”

Your call went unanswered into the big house--you had no clue where she was or if she’d heard you. When Harry finished cutting out the paper medal, he handed it to CeCe who beamed with pride and put it around her neck.

Hands on your hips, “CeCe, will you please find your sister and tell her dinner is ready?”

She took one big breath and then screamed, “MAEVE!”

Both you and Harry flinched at the noise but laughed. She held onto Harry’s arm when she hopped down from the stool, shaking her head in disappointment. “Good god that girl,” she huffed, heading to climb the stairs when she yelled again: Maeve!!!! Dinner!!!!

“She’s a handful tonight,” you said, almost feeling guilty as her footsteps stomped on the floor overhead. “Thank you for that, though,” you said, motioning to the scissors in his hand. “Want a glass of wine?”

“S’not against the rules?” He teased.

When you shot him a look, he smirked and let out a laugh. “I’ll gladly take one. It’s fine, though. She was ready to stab someone flinging the scissors around like that.”

“They just had scissor safety in art class not too long ago.” You told him, pulling the cork from an already open bottle of red. “Sometimes I think she barely listens to anyone--she just does her own thing.”

“Not the worst way to be,” he smiled, picked up the glass when you slid it over on the granite. An awkward beat when he took a sip, smiled in your direction when you did the same. You could hear Maeve and CeCe fighting upstairs, offered him another guilty smile, but then he asked: “do you plan on changing your name?”

“My last name?”

“Yeah--L/N is your married name, right?”

It felt a bit nosy, a bit intrusive for the fourth night he was sleeping under your roof. You shrugged your shoulders casually, unsure how to answer. “Just haven’t gotten to it.”

He’d been quiet so far, out most of the day once the girls were gone for school and he’d return before dinner. Kept to himself--or at least out of the way--and was always helpful when he could be. Bringing groceries in? He carried a few. Needed a hand with clearing plates after dinner? He would gladly help.

Maeve and CeCe came rushing downstairs and were more willing to do the gratitude thing than they usually were, forks in hand when Maeve turned to you. “Oh, by the way, Auntie Shelli is taking us out for dinner tomorrow night.”

“She is?” You smiled at Maeve. “I haven’t heard about that.”

“She promised last week, she said Friday.”

“Okay, well I can check with her.”

“Are you doing anything tomorrow night?” Maeve asked.

“Not a thing,” you said, shaking your head. You’d been looking forward to it all week--maybe a bath and a glass of wine, maybe even a movie if you were feeling adventurous. Zoey was typically after you to do something: dinner, come hold Benny for an hour while she took a shower. You were totally up for helping a friend, but it’d been a minute since you had some me-time and if Jeff’s mom had already offered to babysit, you weren’t going to say no.

CeCe turned to Harry excitedly. “What are you doing tomorrow night? Are you coming to dinner?”

He smiled in her direction but shook his head. “I’m actually going over to a friend’s house.”

“What friend?”

“CeCe,” you laughed, embarrassed by her prying. “He doesn’t have to run everything by you, you know.”

“I know,” she said simply as she shrugged her shoulders innocently. “Just thought maybe it was one of my friends. I don’t know if we have the same friends.”

Harry laughed at this and smiled when you rolled your eyes. “I don’t think you know her.”

You watched Harry for a second, wondered if it was a girlfriend or something of the sort--Jeff hadn’t mentioned anything like that. Why couldn’t he stay there, with that friend?

“Well you should come with us and Auntie Shelli one day,” Maeve said. “We usually get ice cream and she lets us get a bunch of toppings and she doesn’t even care if we’ve had dinner yet.”

You let out a short laugh, the details of their time with family members always slipped out when you least expected it. “He’s busy, girls, remember?”

Harry shrugged, “we could get ice cream soon.”

You looked up at him, forked into a bite of dinner and said quietly: you don’t have to.

He didn’t--Harry didn’t owe you or your daughters anything except common decency and kindness. Helping you clean up after dinner or bring in the groceries was enough of a repayment for a guest room and his own bathroom.

“Maybe next week?” He ignored your comment and smiled at the girls.

“Next week!” CeCe chirped back, brushing her hair out of her face with a grin.

You figured they’d forget--swept up by the excitement of something else by the time next week rolled around and Harry would be off the hook. You smiled in his direction, apologetically and pleading, but it wasn’t until the next night that you realized he was serious.

Jeff’s mom had picked Maeve and CeCe up, you had just poured a glass of wine and went to sit in your office to go over any unread emails when he knocked on the door.

“Hey,” he offered a smile, leaned against the wall and put his hands in his pockets.

“Hi,” you turned to see him, unsure what he wanted or why he was popping in. “What’s up?”

“Uh, just wanted to let you know that my plans fell through--so, I’m just gonna be home--here I mean.”

His correction was quick, a subtle misstep through words.

You pressed your lips into a thin line, nodded slowly as you took in the information. He’d be here--in your house and just hanging out. While you had planned for a quiet night, having one other person somewhere in the house wouldn’t kill you, right? Maybe he’d lock himself away in his room and leave you to your emails, then you’d slip upstairs and end the night with a bath before your children returned with a sugar high and stories for days.

“Okay,” you said. A pause when he nodded, looked at you and then down to the floor.

“Do you want to have a drink?”

“I’ve got one,” you lifted your glass and then faltered. “Oh, together--sure, yeah.”

He held back a laugh, motioned for you to lead the way once you stood up from your desk. He trailed you back through the living room and into the kitchen, got himself a wine glass when you found the bottle you’d already started on the counter.

Was this weird? You couldn’t tell. The house was quiet and for a moment it felt like neither of you knew what to say when the only sound was the cork coming out of the bottle.

“I can venmo you for groceries, too, since m’drinking your wine.” He lifted it and poured, you watched the liquid rise in the glass until he looked up at you, waiting for a reply.

“No, it’s fine.”

“M’eating your food, drinking your wine, sleeping in your house,” he let out a laugh but put the stopper back in. “I feel like I could at least pay you back for some--” he looked down at the bottle and studied the label, “cabernet.”

You pulled out a barstool and sat, a sigh when you waved him off. “S’fine--I’m still making my way through the sorry your dad died and sorry your husband left you bottles.”

His lips pulled up at the side when yours did too. “Where do they make those grapes?”

“Somewhere far away from here,” you nodded, a long sip from your own glass when he moved to sit beside you.

“So how much did Jeff have to beg you to let me stay here?”

You looked over at him, hesitant to admit your own reluctance. You knew he and Jeff were close--you’d long been hearing stories about their nights out or big wins as a team. You’d even been invited to the release party for Harry’s first solo album, but you couldn’t find a babysitter and back then your ex couldn’t be bothered.

“I got a few pleading text messages after he first brought it up,” you smiled.

He laughed and nodded. “Well, it’s a big help. My house is over in Malibu but s’not ready yet--the only guestroom in Jeff’s house shares a wall with the master and something about that felt...weird.”

You narrowed your eyes at him playfully. “You didn’t want to hear Jeff and random women hooking up?”

“Not in the slightest,” he shook his head and bit back a smile. “Figured I’d stay with his parents for a bit but then Irv and Shelli told me they loved me but their rules are strict: their children, grandchildren, and your children. Those are their only guests.”

You nodded, it wasn’t news to you. “One time my dad stayed over after a party and Irv almost hit him with a golf club in the morning because he’d forgotten who was on the couch.”

“Yeah, so, sounds like a good idea that I’m here.” Quiet again when he moved the glass around, then he said: “you know, I would be happy to take them to ice cream or something one night--give you a minute to yourself.”

You smiled, the offer was sweet and apparently he had no idea that he’d just ruined your one chance this week to have that. “You really don’t have to--I’m sorry that they’re so...fascinated by you.”

“No, they’re great, very sweet. Maybe I can tag along when Jeff watches them next and learn the ropes.”

You nodded, reassured by his understanding that watching them would take skill. “There’s a lot to learn, they can be quite the handful sometimes.”

“Yeah?” he tilted his head. “Tell me more about them.”

The way he looked at you stirred a feeling in your chest that you couldn’t quite place. Maybe it was just the fact that he seemed interested enough to ask about them, he already seemed more invested than their father had been over the last year. You also would never turn down an opportunity to humble-brag about the tiny humans you'd created.

“Well, Maeve is pretty straight-edge. She’s always cared a lot about school and she likes it--which is weird, cause she didn’t get that from me and she definitely didn’t get it from my ex-husband. Like, she actually gets excited to come home and do her homework.”

He laughed, sipped from his glass and said: “Right, I’m sure she didn’t get her drive and determination from her mother who started her own successful business.”

You brushed off the compliment with a roll of your eyes and a laugh. “The weird preteen-angst thing is new, though. I have no idea if that’s because of losing my dad or losing hers,” you picked at a thread on your sleeve.

He was quiet for a moment, like he didn’t know what to say to that.

“And CeCe,” you saved him the trouble, “she’s a fireball. She is so strong-willed it actually makes me nervous about when she’s a teenager. She might actually drive to Vegas and get married or something. It’s just her world and we’re living in it.”

His dimples appeared on his cheeks when you shrugged. “Well, you’ve clearly done something right with them. Jeff's always loved being an uncle."

“I appreciate that,” you said honestly, a pause before you admitted: “My ex was never that hands on.”

“Right,” he nodded. “Is that why things ended?”

You let out a short laugh, again unsure if you were sharing too much. Would you wake up and regret the fact that you'd poured a glass of wine, and apparently your deepest secrets, all out on display?

“That, along with the fact that he was cheating on me for a good 18 months, I think.”

“Wow,” he nodded slowly, his lips pushed out in thought when he dropped your gaze. “What a dick.”

“Yeah, better I found out now than later on, I guess.”

“So that and losing your dad this year--”

“Yeah it’s been shitty,” you cut him off, another sip of your wine to avoid having to say more. He looked at your glass, now nearing empty, and reached for the bottle.

“Then you definitely deserve another one of these,” he laughed, fingers pulling the cork out again. “No wonder you got so many sympathy wine bottles.”

He poured himself another too, eventually he followed you into your dad’s old office when he asked what hid behind the mystery door on the first floor.

It was the only room you hadn’t redone yet, something about keeping his records on the book shelves and his papers on the desk felt like it kept him here. He’d chosen the green for the walls and you apologized when Harry’s eyebrows shot up at the sight.

“Great man,” you nodded, turning on a light switch, “terrible decorating taste.”

Harry nodded slowly, wine glass still in hand and a smirk fighting it’s way onto his face. “S’a bright color, yeah.”

He let out a laugh when he made eye contact with you, a disapproving look on your face when you walked over to the desk. “All these strewn about--probably some important information about you over here somewhere.”

He came over and lifted a paper. “Harry Styles is one of the most thoughtful, caring, and funny people I know.”

“Really?” You tugged at his arm to get a better view of the paper. Your dad’s handwriting was almost illegible, a date scribbled on top and another few words halfway down the small notebook page, nothing about Harry and nothing that seemed all that important.

“I hope that’s what he thought of me,” Harry smiled, his eyes flickered to where you still had a grip around his wrist. “Your nails are digging into me.”

“Sorry,” you pulled back immediately. “Sometimes I have to grab CeCe like that in the store or she runs off.”

He kept your gaze for a second, but it felt uncomfortable and made you nervous, so you cleared your throat. “Feel free to come in here and use this stuff,” you motioned over to the piano and the guitars he had in stands. “No one uses it, so--it’d be good for it to get played.”

“You don’t play anything?”

You shook your head. “No--he’d started to teach me guitar when I was young but then my mom died, just never picked it up again.”

You were thirteen when it happened, a car accident on the 405 and you didn’t go to school for weeks. Your dad had always been your main support--they divorced when you were ten--but after that you grew even closer, which is why losing him was so hard. He’d been a friend and a parent and the best grandfather who helped pick up the pieces when things with Luke started to crumble.

Harry was quiet, a simple nod when he went over to the piano and sat. You felt the need to shift the topic of conversation to something less depressing than the unfortunate events of your life.

“Are you writing a lot for the album still?”

“Yeah--we’ve got a few things written that might end up on it, but, mostly just experimenting with some new sounds.”

He pressed a chord down on the piano and looked up at you. “How do Maeve and CeCe seem to be handling it all?”

“Which part?”

“Both.”

You shrugged. “They’ve asked a lot about where their father is and why he hasn’t visited. And they understand that their grandpa is gone, but they’re sad, I think. CeCe’s had more nightmares than usual.”

He smiled a little. “And how are you doing with all of it?”

You let out a tiny laugh, mostly out of discomfort with the sudden seriousness in his voice and the way he already pulled more out of you than you’d planned. “I’m fine.”

He lifted his brows but played another progression of chords. “Wouldn’t blame you if you’re not.”

You took a sip of the cabernet and watched as he hummed along to whatever he played. When he looked up at you and waited for a reply, you smiled. “Some days I want to pull my hair out and others I need a good glass of wine. I kind of oscillate between those two lately.”

“Well, I’m always happy to split a bottle with you.”

You nodded, tried to fight the smile on your face when he laughed but then gave in. “Good.”

**

You woke up the next morning with a bit of a headache from the third and unexpected glass of wine. The girls were home by 9pm and unfortunately for you, the weekend was busy with play dates and birthday parties and grocery shopping.

Monday had you back in the office and recounting the first week to Tristan over an iced latte and a breakfast sandwich you’d grabbed after school drop off. Now it was cold and you were approaching the mid-day slump you were all too familiar with.

“I just can’t believe you’re alive still, to be honest. You know--seeing as you thought he’d be a serial killer or something.”

You looked over at him with narrowed eyes. “I didn’t think he was a serial killer.”

“Just a pedophile?”

“Alright,” you waved him off. “I can admit that it’s been fine--good, even. It’s only been a week, though.”

“Right,” he shrugged. “Halfway there. Maybe week two is when he goes crazy.”

You ignored the teasing from your friend and looked back to your computer. “Do you know if Kailee ordered the new bottles for the matcha face mask?”

“Yesterday afternoon,” he nodded. “And we also got the labels in for them as well. They ship off to the packaging plant on Tuesday.”

“Good, and numbers are up from last quarter which is really good. The meeting with the investors should go well.”

“Yeah, I mean, our entire profit has doubled since this time last year,” he smiled in your direction, a subtle reminder that the late night emails on top of the worst year ever had already proven to be worth it. “You should be very proud.”

“I am,” you admitted. “Of us. All of us.”

“Yes, what kind of boss would you be if you took all of the credit?” He teased.

“A bad one, but I’m also the type of boss that leaves at lunch time to go home and change since I have a meeting this afternoon that I forgot all about.”

He looked you up and down when you stood.

“It’s with people from Anthropologie about carrying some of our products in store--so I don’t think I can wear athleisure.”

He laughed and kept typing. “Fair enough. See you at 2pm, though, for the website meeting?”

“Yes,” you promised as you grabbed your keys. “Please don’t let the place burn down while I’m gone.”

“Might throw the match myself,” he waved you off, a laugh at his own joke when you headed for the elevator.

You were proud of the company you’d built and the office you’d been able to purchase two years back, but you were more proud of the energy that buzzed through the halls and the people who made work feel less like work and more like the adventure of a lifetime. You tried to be the cool boss who brought enough coffee for everyone, gave good time off but still expected hard work and drive to be the core of the business.

It took a while to settle into the role, though. At first you were sure you’d be seen as a spoiled rich kid who got a loan from her father to start a company--but it only took one year to repay him when you started getting placements in health food markets across LA. When Kourtney Kardashian posted something about your raspberry toner, the rest was history.

You’d always been passionate about making people feel good about themselves and focused your entire brand on building people up, not tearing them down. The world had enough of that as a mother of two daughters, you hoped it’d be something that would change that narrative, at least for them.

The drive home was quick and the sun was shining, which put a pep in your step as you hopped out of the car in the driveway and headed for the side door.

Harry’s car was still here--you’d left earlier than usual but didn’t expect him to be home. If anything, you figured he’d left shortly after you and planned on staying late in the studio. Jeff had mentioned something about laying down new tracks.

“Hello?” You called into the kitchen and looked around, he wasn’t in the living room or out by the pool. You found a laundry basket at the top of the second floor and figured that maybe someone had picked him up, but the sound of muffled singing pulled you down the hall and closer to his guest room.

The door was cracked only a bit, the sun streamed in from the windows and you could hear the running water of the shower. It was wrong, maybe, but you pushed the door open and stepped inside, smiled to yourself at the fact that he was singing a Carole King song that your dad used to play on repeat when you were a kid.

The room was clean--you hadn’t been in it since you’d pointed out the linen closet in the bathroom and showed him how to use the TV remote. His bed was made--maybe not the way you would have made it but the throw pillows were arranged in a way that showed he tried.

A buzzing on the dresser pulled your attention away from the bed. His phone, a message from someone named Bria Whitmore. Another message, then a third. You took a step closer--who on earth was texting him this much without a reply? A girlfriend? Someone he probably slept with or something of the sort.

“Hi,” his voice pulled your head around quickly and sent your heartbeat through the roof.

“Jesus, hi--sorry--I was just--”

He was in a towel, the fabric wrapped loosely around his waist and hair was slicked back from the water. You looked away from the tattoos that littered his skin and looked down at the laundry basket.

“I was just seeing if you had any laundry you needed me to do?”

It was clean, but he didn’t need to know that.

“M’good,” he smiled like he didn’t believe you. “Why are you home?”

“Had to change--forgot about a meeting,” you let out a laugh and tried to slow your pulse. “Figured the pilates mom look wasn’t the right vibe.”

He nodded, moved around you in the center of the room to pull out a t-shirt from a drawer. You saw him look down at the cell phone you’d been eyeing.

“Your phone went off,” you admitted, the laundry basket still pressed up against your hip.

“Yeah?” He smirked over his shoulder.

“I was just making sure it wasn’t an emergency--I wasn’t, like, snooping.”

A dimple appeared on his left cheek again, he tugged the fabric over his head and then shook out his hair.

“S’not an emergency,” he said. “Just a friend.”

You didn’t know if that was code. Were twenty-somethings calling their booty-calls friends now? You figured you’d ask Tristan later.

“Why are you home?” You tossed the question back at him.

“Schedule changed--went for a run after breakfast and now just, showering, y’know,” he looked down at the towel that separated you from an even more awkward moment.

“Right, sorry, I...am leaving,” you pointed to the door. “Changing, back to the office, home tonight.”

“Sounds good,” he smiled. “Figured I could make dinner, if you wanted. I make a mean chicken taco.”

You took a few steps backwards to the door. “You cook?”

“I do,” he smiled. “Hard to believe?”

“No,” you shook your head. “That would be great--if you want, but you don’t have to.”

“I’d love to,” he nodded. “I’ll see you tonight, Y/N.”

“With more clothes,” you smiled, immediately regretting the bad joke and the attention it drew to the stuffy air and the butterflies in your stomach.

“Definitely more clothes.”

You made a face at yourself once the door was shut, idiot. At least you hadn’t accidentally seen a picture of someone’s boobs. You were sure he got plenty of those.

You pushed the thought out of your head and thankfully Harry didn’t smirk at you too much when Jeff came to pick up the girls for ice cream the next afternoon. They hadn’t forgotten, but luckily Jeff had offered to take them out one night and it seemed like the perfect opportunity for Harry to tag along. That way he could stay true to his word and the girls would stop pestering him every time he popped down to the kitchen.

Zoey had been begging to bring the baby over to get out of the house, and now she was sitting in the other room with Benny on a play mat on the floor. Maeve, CeCe, Jeff and Harry stood in a line, eagerly awaiting the green light to pile into Jeff’s car.

“Okay, so Uncle Jeff can text me if you need anything, see you around 7pm?”

“Yes ma’am,” Jeff said, a salute in your direction that pulled a giggle from both of your daughters.

They’d been fighting more lately, CeCe tried to take the medal from Maeve’s room one night over the weekend and suddenly it was like world war three. You were shocked that they’d gotten it together enough to spend some time in each other's presence, even with Uncle Jeff chaperoning, but you were eager for the quiet and hopeful the screaming matches wouldn’t return once the ice cream and dinner date was finished.

“Love you, be nice to each other, okay?” You leaned down and used both hands to hold CeCe’s head in place when you planted a kiss on her forehead, then Maeve. A hug for Jeff, “only one ice cream cone this time.”

He laughed but obliged, you moved down the line to Harry, an awkward nod in his direction when you realized that whatever type of acquaintanceship had slowly started to bloom between the two of you was hardly grounds for a kiss on the forehead or even a hug.

He apparently sensed this too, a playful smile on his face when he lifted his brows. “No farewell for me?”

Jeff let out a quick laugh but Maeve and CeCe took off for the car, racing to see who could get out the front door fastest. “Alright, don’t kill each other,” you reminded again, waved them all off with an embarrassed smirk and then watched as Harry helped CeCe buckle into her booster seat.

“So,” Zoey appeared beside you, Benny in her arms as she looked out the window. “Seems like things are going well.”

“Yeah,” you shrugged casually. “He’s been nice.”

“He seems friendly,” she wiggled her brows when she met your gaze. “Flirty friendly.”

“Just friendly,” you laughed and headed for the kitchen to pour yourself a drink. It might have only been Tuesday, but the week promised to be a busy one. You wiped up a runaway drip of wine on the rim, fully aware the words about to leave your mouth would push Zoey into gear. “But I did see him shirtless yesterday.”

“That sounds amazing,” she shifted Benny in her arms, eagerness in her voice. “How was it?”

“I mean--he also caught me snooping in his room, sort of.”

“Sort of?”

You tried to downplay it. “I came home from work in the middle of the day to change and I heard him in the shower--which is weird cause I didn’t think he’d be home.”

“So you went in there?”

“Not the bathroom--I just peeked into his room and noticed it was really clean. Which is weird, right? He’s a kid!”

“He’s not a kid,” she rolled her eyes at you. “Your kids are kids. He’s twenty-four. I looked it up.”

Your eyes were wide when you turned to head for the couch. “You looked it up?”

“I was curious! He’s a celebrity living in your house and he’s very attractive and you have been harping on his age.”

“Because it felt weird at first.”

“And it doesn’t now?” Her tone was hopeful when she laid Benny back on his play mat and kneeled beside him.

You took a gulp from your wine glass. “Less weird, but only because he’s mature. He’s helpful around the house--he cooked dinner the other night--and he’s good with the girls.”

The corner of her mouth pulled towards the ceiling, arched eyebrows when she clarified. “He’s good with the girls?”

“He’s just nice to them--I was worried that they’d annoy him. I mean, I doubt that he was excited to hear that two of his roommates were six and ten.”

“Okay--but why did you see him shirtless?”

Right--she’d gotten you off track. “Because...I went in his room and then saw his phone buzzing and then he came out and caught me looking at his phone.”

“You were looking through his phone?!”

“No! Not the actual texts, just to see who was blowing it up. I only looked at the lock screen.”

“Was he annoyed?”

“No,” you shrugged, shame laced through your voice. “He was casual. But then he put his shirt on and I left him alone and went back to work.”

“So there’s sexual tension,” she shimmied her shoulders and pulled a laugh from you, she nuzzled down into Benny’s face but then gave him a pacifier.

“No.”

This brought her gaze back to you, more serious now. “Y/N, you are not a creep if you admit that you find him attractive.”

“I can admit that he’s handsome,” you chose a new word that felt more detached. “But who cares? He’s literally just a house guest. A friend of a friend.”

“Right, but he was just flirting with you like there’s no tomorrow.”

“No he wasn’t,” you denied her accusation. When she stared at you expectantly, you took a loud sip and let the obnoxious noise ring through the now empty house as if it would preclude you from saying any more.

“You truly, seriously, one-hundred percent haven’t noticed any type of flirting?”

You averted your eyes for a second, ready to dismiss her question and tell her she was crazy. There was nothing going on between the two of you.

But then you thought on it, thought about the way he asked about Maeve and CeCe and remembered the way your stomach seemed to twist itself in knots when he smirked at you and when the dimples appeared on his cheeks.

“The look on your face is enough of an answer,” Zoey teased, bouncing side to side when Benny made a noise. “Isn’t that right, Benny Boo? Someone has a crush.”

“There’s no crush here--he’s just,” a shrug of your shoulders when you didn’t know what words to use. You didn’t want to add fuel to her fire and you certainly didn’t want to give her any more of a reason to keep bringing this topic up.

“Dreamy? Beautiful? The perfect rebound post-divorce?”

A flutter of your eyelids in annoyance when you stood to head for the kitchen. “No,” you said, making a face in her direction. “He’s just cute.”

“So cute!” She followed behind and egged you on. “A crush is perfectly harmless, a little bedtime rendezvous is totally not a big deal.”

“I think we’re getting ahead of ourselves, here, okay?”

“Oh come on,” she laughed. “You mean to tell me you haven’t already thought about if he’s good in bed?”

She came to sit next to you at the island, folding her legs beneath her. When you sipped at your wine and tried to hide a smirk, her face lit up. “I knew it, I knew it! I don’t blame you, at all, by the way. He’s gorgeous.”

“I’m just horny, number one,” you admitted, leaning forward to rest your elbow on the granite counter. “And seeing a man actually be good with kids is a breath of fresh air.”

“Yeah, Luke didn’t set the bar high with that one.”

“Absolutely not.”

A pause of silence when evening air blew through the open doors to the patio. There was music audible through the trees, wafting in from the backyard of your neighbors.

“I think you should fuck him.”

“What?!” You turned towards her quickly, your voice quieter when she smirked and looked over at you. “Are you out of your mind?”

“You have a ridiculously attractive man living in your house and he hangs out with your kids and now he’s starting to cook? It’s like a lifetime movie waiting to happen.”

“That doesn’t mean I should have sex with him!”

“Do you want to have sex with him?”

You were quiet for a second, kept her gaze but then rolled your eyes and shook your head. “I’ve had a bad year,” you made an excuse for the pulsing in your veins whenever you were alone with him. Nothing more, nothing less.

“When does he leave again?”

“I don’t know--at the end of the week, I guess. It’s not happening, so don’t get any ideas.”

“Alright,” she seemed to relent, “You do you. I just think you deserve a little feel good time.”

“That sounds gross,” you wrinkled your nose, pulling a laugh out of her.

She was able to change the topic, told you all about the way Benny was getting better at lifting his own head and he was screaming a lot less when she put him down for some tummy time. Your phone dinged, though, signalling a new text just when you were about to pull out leftovers and heat them up.

She watched when you opened it, got excited when you smirked at the screen.

“Who is it?”

You almost didn’t want to show her, but you knew she’d pry it out of your hands with force if you didn’t share. You flipped it around, watched as a smile spread across her face.

A picture of Harry and CeCe, both with sunglasses on as they ate their ice cream. Maeve and Jeff were in the background, the line at the ice cream shop down the street wasn’t too long. You were kind of surprised he was willing to go with them, wouldn't it create a buzz in the headlines?

Zoey gave you a knowing look.

“It’s just sweet.”

“Are you sure?”

“I don’t know,” you smiled a little at first, but the happiness faded from your face when you pulled yourself back to reality. “I feel stupid thinking that he’s flirting with me. He could be with a supermodel if he wanted to. One with perky boobs and who’s, like, twenty. Not someone who’s old enough to be his mom.”

“You are seven years older than him,” she made a disgusted face. “You could have been, like, his babysitter, not his mom.”

“Oh, that makes me feel so much better.”

“You’re being stupid about this!”

You paused with tupperware in your hands, turned around slowly. “I am not being dumb about not having casual sex with the popstar boyband kid living under my roof. I think not having sex with him is objectively the responsible thing to do here.”

“Why do you always have to be so responsible, though? You have been doing that forever, okay? You’re the business owner mom who’s always been incredibly family-oriented.”

“Is that a bad thing?”

“No, not in the slightest! But you’re more than just a mom.”

You bit at your cheek and dropped her gaze, put the tupperware down from exhaustion. “I just want my children to have a normal life. I only had one parent and I thought they were going to have two and now that ship has sailed.”

She nodded sympathetically. “But that doesn’t mean you did anything wrong! You never relaxing and having a good time will only teach them bad work-life balance.”

You rolled your eyes at her comment, tried to fight the smile when she waited for you to fold. “I love you,” she said. “I want you to get laid or have a drink or let your hair down once in a while.”

You held up the wine in her face. “Already halfway there.”

She reached for the bottle of wine and shoved it towards you with skeptical eyes. “Try harder.”

You let out a laugh and took another sip once it was refilled, pushed plates into the microwave and sat there with her until Jeff’s car pulled back into the driveway and the girls came tumbling back into the house.

“Mom, Harry said he could teach me how to play guitar,” Maeve grinned up at you, an affectionate hug caught you by surprise, but so did her words.

“He did, did he?” You eyed Harry as he walked in with Jeff by his side, sunglasses still on his face despite the sun lingering just above the horizon.

“We’ll start a band,” Harry nodded in her direction, kept his eyes shielded as CeCe ran into the backyard with a noise of excitement.

“And Uncle Jeff said he’ll sing.”

“You’ll definitely get far, then,” you teased, pulling an offended look from your childhood friend. “He’s obviously the best singer in the house.”

Harry nodded in playful agreement. “Could put me out of a job any day.”

“Maeve!” CeCe called suddenly, pulling everyone’s attention to the backyard. “Come play squishball!”

Harry looked down at Maeve and she looked up at him, you were unaware of whatever unspoken communication was transpiring between them. “Should we?” He asked.

“Definitely,” she giggled, hands on her hips.

Zoey was also confused, but she watched as Maeve and Harry headed for the patio. Harry finally took his sunglasses off, handed them to your older daughter before he spoke. “CeCe, we need to have a meeting.”

“A meeting?” She asked, she groaned in disappointment but walked back towards the house, bat dragging on the grass behind her. Jeff laughed and folded his arms over his chest, unaware of whatever deal had already been struck between them.

“You two are both really great at squishball,” Harry admitted, his voice suddenly more serious than before. “But I think we need to up the stakes.”

“Up the stakes?” You could tell by the look on CeCe’s face that she had no clue what that meant.

“Winner of this game gets the medal I won from the spelling bee,” Maeve explained.

You were about to protest, head outside and discourage any type of betting or gambling or whatever the backyard made up game was leading towards, but Harry went on to explain the rules. “CeCe gets a head start running bases, just because of her tiny legs.”

Maeve nodded, “and she gets a free home run to start off.”

CeCe smiled wide and put her hands on her hips, pulling a laugh from Harry as she copied her older sister. “I like the sound of that,” she said. A sure-fire way to make her win, you realized. But what was in that for Maeve? How had your previously grumpy pre-teen become a team player in a matter of hours?

It wasn’t long before Zoey gathered up her things and put Benny in the backseat, giggling and excited yells floated in from the backyard when you hugged her goodbye. Jeff stayed past sunset and offered an excited high five when CeCe won, completely unaware at how easy they’d made it for her.

But he soon left, too, you climbed the stairs behind your two little athletes, got them washed up and in bed before it was 9pm--not bad for a weeknight. You were sure Harry would have retreated to his room, too, but he was sat by the fire pit on the patio, a near empty glass of wine in his hand when you came back out.

“Care to explain?” you leaned against the doorframe and smiled. He adjusted in his seat but shrugged his shoulders when you admitted: “I never thought I would hear the end of it with that stupid medal.”

There was a confident look on his face when he met your eyes in the glow of the fire pit. “Figured I can teach her a few chords on guitar and that would take her mind off of taunting CeCe.”

It was smart, you nodded slowly and watched him. Give Maeve something that would get her really excited, but only if she’d give up something else. Bargaining--a classic parenting trick. You eyed Harry with a level of skepticism.

“How are you so good with them?”

He smiled at that, apparently flattered by the compliment. “They’re good kids,” he said simply.

“I’m aware,” you laughed, “but you don’t have to spend so much time with them.”

“I like it,” he shrugged. “It’s kind of nice to be around a family, you know?”

The words pulled emotion to your chest. Did you really look like a family to him? No husband, no grandfather, two irreplaceable roles and now you were trying to fill all of them just to keep your kids afloat.

“And besides,” he stood from his chair and grabbed the now empty glass before he came closer to you. “Something about being here just feels right.”

You looked up at him, felt the same rush of heat to your cheeks but hoped you were safe in the cover of night. He smirked, like he knew what he was doing to you but was too much of a gentleman to call you out. Hesitation when you felt some type of magnetic force between you, the distance simultaneously felt like inches and miles.

You smiled softly, embarrassed by the way your pulse picked up and the thoughts that flew through your head. What would happen if I, does he ever think about, am I crazy if I want to?

He brushed past you and walked to the sink, placing the wine glass down quietly before he turned to face you once more. “Is it as bad as you thought?”

Confusion, you wiped your sweaty palms on your pants. “Sorry?”

“Having me here,” he motioned around, the dimple on his left cheek was visible even in the dim light. You rolled your eyes, dropped his gaze for a second when he let out a quiet laugh. “I hope that it’s only as miserable as you thought--m’just aiming for not worse than expected at this point.”

You turned to face him and put your hands on the granite, thankful for the fact that the island was now between you, the ticking of a clock on the wall kept time when you tried to piece your words together carefully.

Was he flirting with you? A similar to question to that he'd asked only a few nights earlier, this time with more of a smirk on his face and a lilt in his voice that made sent a shiver down your spine.

“It’s better,” you admitted with a nod and a teasing smile. “But don’t tell Jeff that.”

He crossed his arms over his chest, held your gaze and then nodded. “Your secret’s safe with me.”

There was silence for a second, you almost offered to pour him another glass of wine but then he said: “Only a few more days, though.”

“Yeah,” you nodded, the fantasy shattered on the floor between you. “How’s the house coming?”

He winced, a quiet laugh when he shook his head. “Everything’s been pushed out a few weeks, actually. But--it’s fine, I’m probably just going to stay with a friend or something, you know, don’t want to overstay my welcome.”

You brought your lips into a thin line, unsure if what you were about to offer was appropriate or weird or just plain awkward.

“Oh...well, I mean, if you want to stay here longer, you can.”

His mouth pulled up on the side, he brought his gaze back to you and shifted his weight on his feet. “Yeah? You don’t mind?”

You shrugged, again hoping to play it cool or not come off too eager. “If that would be helpful,” you trailed off.

“Yeah, very helpful.”

“Cool.”

“Cool,” he nodded, pulling another smirk from you.

A few more weeks, tops.

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[matthew-gray-gubler-lover]

(spencer reid) hero part 2

we have to find him. part 2 of spencer reid hero.

*WARNING*

this story has mentions of abusive relationship, and brief description of the victim.season 11 reid.mentions of Maeve Donovan in later chapters.18+.please do not read if any of this bother/upset you.

reid and morgan are driving back to the police station .

"hotch we need to find out who is hiding this guy".  morgan says over the phone.

"did you get anything from amber?" hotch asks.

"not much, she was afraid of morgan" reid adds

"why?" jj asks over the phone

"i think it's because morgan is an alpha male, so i am thinking so was josh" reid tells the team.

"was she afraid of you?" jj asks reid.

"no, she seemed clam talking to me" reid answers

"you could be on to something their kid, if josh was an alpha male she would act that way to morgan" rossi says

"why would anyone want to help this man?" prentiss asks

"loyalty he could have a partner; they would hide him" hotch adds

"well we need to find this son of a bitch, we don't know he won't hurt amber again" morgan says

"is she still in the hospital?" rossi asks

"yes" reid answers

"that might keep her safe for now"

"i hope so" reid says softly.

after reid and morgan return to the station they are talking to the team.

"why are you so upset about this case reid?, we see bad stuff all the time" Prentiss asks

"i don't know there is just something about amber, i don't know what it is" reid answers looking at a pic of amber in Happer times, she is smiling, she has a pretty silver dress on, it looks like a new years eve party.

" maybe you can relate to her?" jj says

"how?" reid asks, with a bit of anger.

"i don't know being Afred of someone or something you can't control" jj answers

"like how my dad and gideon just left me with nothing but a note?" reid says with anger and a bit louder then he meant to.

"we are going to give the profile, did you get a picture of josh?" hotch asks reid

"no" morgan answers

"i'll call garcia" hotch says as he takes out his phone.

"tell me what Ya need, and how you want it" garcia answers the call

"garcia it's hotch"

"oh sorry, what do you need boss man?"

"we are looking for a man named josh van-camp, can you get a picture of him?"

"oh yes i can, i am sending it to you now"

reid looking at the picture: "so this is josh van-camp?"

"are you ready to find him pretty boy?" morgan asks reid

"yes i am" he answers looking at the photo of the man that hurt amber with disgust.

"lets go put these photos out and see if anyone can tell us were to find him" rossi says taking a hand full of photos.

reid just stands there looking at this piece of crap in the photo.

"reid, are you ok?" hotch asks.

"yeah i um, yeah i'm fine" reid tells him.

"are you sure?" hotch asks with the hotch stare.

"i just want to find this guy" reid says picking up the photos and his bag.

reid, rossi and prentiss head out to pass the photos around and see if anyone knows josh.

"so no one has seen him?" hotch asks rossi over the phone.

"it does seem so" rossi answers

"so do you want to talk about it?" prentiss asks reid.

"talk about want?"

"why this case is bothering you so much?, i can see it, the whole team can"

"it's a bad case prentiss, how can it not bother you?" reid asks.

"it does, but reid we see stuff like this all the time"

"i don't know what to tell you emily, i am fine"

reid's phone rings

"hello?"

"we need to give the profile" hotch tells reid.

they all go back and give the proflie

"we are looking for a 25 year old male, with black hair and green eyes, he has a tattoo of a rattle snake on his right bicep" hotch tells the officers.

"this is in attempt to make it look tough but he's really just a coward" reid adds

"in fact when we find him, he will be a wuss, a man that beats up his beautiful girlfriend because he knows she can't fight back, he couldn't ever handle a real man because they would fight back" reid keeps talking.

the teams eyes widen.

"we don't know that for sure, we can only tell you what we think you are looking for, here are some photos of josh van-camp, this is the man you are looking for" hotch tells the room.

"in the mean time we will have one of our agents staying with amber" reid tells the room.

"thank you, we will let you know if there is anything else" hotch tells the room.

"oh morgan you will be the first one to stay with amber" hotch tells morgan.

"what!! no!!! amber is afread of morgan" reid yells.

"well someone needs to stay with her ried" hotch says.

"i can do it, she feels safe with me, so i will stay with her, the team can do just fine without me"

"reid, you want to stay there with amber and not help the team?" hotch asks.

"i am helping the team by staying with her, the team wouldn't have morgan and you were fine with that" reid adds.

"fine reid will being watching amber" hotch says.

part 3 coming soon