#does he have to give his middle name to Tom in 3 days?

[theoryandahalf]

It might be Ash GT Live's birthday today, (if I'm reading X correctly). Happy Birthday, Ash!

If not, enjoy Ash Wednesday (heh) with my favorite GT Live clip of the modern era, MatPat Game Theory's introduction to Tumblr Sexy Men!

Credit to GTLolMemes

[too-many-rooks]

Spoiler warning: Long rambly notes I took while watching season 3, disclaimer that a lot of this is just character moments/lines I found interesting and initial bones of an au idea for a burgeoning, extremely self indulgent slightly-darker-Alex in season 3 wip I’ve started.

Also it was the middle of the night and I was very tired and wired out of my gourd on some mix of cheap white wine and floods of hyperfixation-sourced dopamine. Also also I only started taking notes at ep 3?

Episode 3

Alex is SUCH a better spy this season than when he began even in the first few episodes prior to SCORPIA training he’s more careful and precise and the team feels better organised - he did so well on that boat I’m so proud of my baby

I’m actually enjoying Tom and Kyra fucking about more than I expected. Tom pulling Kyra together after the boat explosion suprised me by how emotive it was. But I do want them to.. go away. Alex should more isolated/desperate/have NO other choices than SCORPIA.

Everything in Malagosto seems so staged to just see how Alex will react to it all - here’s an unlocked door, here’s an Alex sized vent and a dead spot in the cameras, what are you gonna do about it? +Alex absolutely speaks French I think he’s just not giving that away yet

Oh yes yes lingering bad touch from Julia Rothman hitting the right notes even though that costume is a WILD kaftan moment. Evil carmen sandiago/noir femme fatale aesthetic where are you I miss you so much

Ohhhh Julia saying Ian walked away and abandoned him and that was what hit him worst oh my goooooooooood

(Outfit change from julie mean day change or is she just a multiple outfits a day kinda person. Believable, I guess)

Julia’s gaslighting I ssoooo crazy ‘we trust you. We want you.’ After having his closest people not trust him, and now maybe questioning if Ian even wanted him!

Julia fucking loved this, she’s totally thrilled by her own power. Queen 👸🏻.

God Jones and the department is going THROUGH IT THIS SEASON, just suddenly surrounded by corpses

Julia : offers irrefutable proof, upsets him, then presses him to continue believing what he did before and belittling his objections - very subtle but more firm tone of voice, less motherly/accepting, very clear that the noose around Alex’s neck is always there.

She’s so delighted at the prospect of making Alex into the perfect soldier

Julia: “I want you to meet your tutor”

Me: ‘here he here he comes here he comes.’ And then I threw of my blanket, pushed myself onto my knees, and started bouncing and palm clapping in sheer delight. I basically never happy stim like this but MY GOD the flood of dopamine is IMMENSE.

More manic laughter at the start of episode 4 realising I’m about to see John and young Yassen. Nicuragua! 18 years ago!

God nervous baby Yassen with a gun

HES!! SO!!! BABY!!!

Baby boy already got his colour scheme locked down

Baby Yassen has curls - is it just the humidity or maybe does he have naturally curly hair that he straightens so he looks less cute?

Johns actor has a real resemblance to Ian (and Jack Lowden) but less so to otto

Ohoho scar moment scar moment bc Yassen was nervous and fucked up two people one bullet

“Close your eyes” as I tell these people I’m going to shoot you and have faith

God cut to adult Yassen WATCHING ALEX SLEEP LOOKING SO INTENSE

“Leave the past behind us.” “Ian rider was a professional. It was not personal it was my job.” “Think of this as a school and your dead by the end of the day” (actual honesty for the first time)

Alex not committing to being able to work with Yassen is perfect

Yassen taking Alex TO HIS KNEES so easily besties not been slowed down too much by a bullet to the chest

Soaking wet!!!!!!!!

Alex shooting scene amazing, as was Yassen bursting into his room immediately after for a murder pep talk. Alex has no privacy privileges from Yassen

Yassen removing the humanity from his targets, names/faces/lives are irrelevant, they are just blank targets. “One day you’ll have to murder them.”

“That’s not gonna happen”

Yassen *be so ffr rn face*

Really interesting to see the other side of the department covering up an agent death and lying to the family - I like the department with more humanity/emotional resonance than pure ruthlessness

Shitty Malagosto communal dorm room and matching drab grey hoodies my beloved

Shame there’s no ‘your not afraid of a little prick are you?’ ‘I wouldn’t call you that’ line. (But switching out the ‘getting vaccinated will implant you with secret nano tech that will kill you’ plottline probs a good idea)

Ooooh Julia creepily poisoning him so excited making me think of her delighting in drugging him in a cocktail of ‘let me take care of you’ ways

Yassen pulling rank to break up the fight!!

Ooh Nile wants to take down Yassen so bad.

Toms film skills coming in clutch recording/ documenting things so Alex will be taken seriously, glad to see him be… less of a dead weight to the team

Begrudgingly-impressed-at-Alex Yassen, even with the “come on that’s a bad idea”, “yeah, but!” Teenagerisms

Yassen’s core (suppressed) emotions: fear, doubt, panic

Alex: love, hope, friendship (okay dear, 🙄 but remember you’re literally becoming an assassin why are you so niave all of a sudden?)

Alex insisting John saved him bc he had compassion and was his friend and that Yassen’s rejection of that makes him lonely oh oh my heart my heart

I LOVE how much fun Nile has being evil at his job of threatening children.

Episode 5

Oh my god HIT HIM ALEX where do you think you are? How do you think you’ll actually manage to get those trainees to trust you? Stop whining and hit the man with a wooden sword, christ

Smithers (in reference to Alex) “he’s out there being a teenager because of us” *cut to Alex, very much in danger, contemplating his capacity to kill*

Julia: “no one leaves,” [scorpia, me, interchangeable to her]

mission with Yassen!

Packing for the mission with Yassen!!!

Yassen can’t read his handwriting!!!

“You’ve put… lockpick?”

“I left my last one in Nile. “

Alex bitching about his meagre gadgets at point Blanc 💯

Matching tactical turtlenecks!!!

“I don’t want you to fail. I don’t want you to die.”

Alex and Yassen are a team but Yassen gives Alex command of them oh boysieeeee

Again glad they dropped the vaccine bit: vaccines aren’t dangerous, but vaping is!!

Of on a road trip with Yassen!!

A murder road trip!

Love Kyra seeing the shot and the body - I know why it didn’t happen but I do kinda wish for a more corrupted violent Alex coerced/bargained into firing it himself

That Tom confrontation was great - I do want to see it as like a ‘your getting in my way’ intentional cruelty to push him away and keep him safe when Alex is too deep in SCORPIA to be deluded about thinking he can go home

Alex rejects intimacy with Julia and she cracks down her authority ‘no one leaves’

Ep 6

Love Alex spooky in the cemetery, SCORPIA hot on his heels

Sharing a grotty safe house together god SO GOOD

“We trust each other. You should try it sometime.”

“If it’s not emotional why do you do it?”

“Because it’s my job. (Identity/life/personal connections/sacrificed everything for) I work for SCORPIA. I’m good at it. You could be too.” Olive branch of intimacy - wants alex to be more like him, so they can be equals, can share this life that he apparently finds satisfaction in, not thinking or making decisions beyond how best to achieve his goal/finish the task(/order)assigned to him/subject himself to feeling emotions/thinking about his life beyond his attempts to depersonalise himself as just a weapon - just a professional with no emotions, and that that is fundamentally who he is. Evidently having some inconvenient feelies about Alex tho.

Oh no his delivery disguise makes him look like a caveman. Glad he took off the accessories for the Jones confrontation, his hair actually looks great there all tousled. (Beginning to realise how important characters hair is to me bc I still hate Julia’s I want some dark perfect waves this Bob is ough)

I’m really glad they settled on Yassen NOT knowing about John - he twists it that John didn’t betray him bc he had nothing to gain from being kind to him, so it wasn’t false, but he is so 100% loyal to John, eager to twist any criticism. I do wish we’d seen more of their relationship, but expecting some Russian roulette bits was overly optimistic

“I know my place” he’s IMMEDIATELY off to rescue his boy (actually, where did he go? All of that last episode I was just WHAT ABOUT YASSEN? Was he just plotting a rescue that didn’t need to happen and waiting for his boy to show up?)

Dare I say… good for blunt? Stephen dillane is just so charming I can’t help but like him. And you see some flashes of his ruthlessness like when he talks to Greif but he’s not a 24/7 conniving monster. Also Jones in charge and Alex possibly (definitely) returning to spy work in a couple of years? I like that. Totally abandoning it would have felt unsatisfying.

Loved that moment on the roof - missed opportunity for them to awkwardly wave at each other, but I’m so happy I predicted wrongly and Yassen gets to live and walk away and put down his weapons. There’s so much space for how they can reconnect in that.

[allycat75]

Oops, looks like your lazy, soullessness is beginning to show to the general public again, Boston Dumb Fuck.

Too bad they have more faith in your future projects than the rest of us.

And they didn't even mention your fake, arrogant, talentelss, entitled, insipid, childish, manipulative, racist, antimemtic, fatshaming wifey. That stink will never leave you, even when the "divorce" announcement comes out, you know that, right? Especially if one day you find a woman you actually like and wants to be with you too, because every article will be "Fuckface here was previously married to a talentless, toilet masterbating Nazi named Abba Bautista, for like 2 or 3 years or something according to the latest People Magazine timeline, and his family adored her. Good luck with this one, dipshit!"

You insisted on setting up unsuccessful stunts to prove your current brand is "married" to the beast, but only showcased how miserable you are when forced to be in her presence, possibly in an insane attempt to have it mean something to people when the break up article finally does come out (Spoiler Alert- no one gives a fuck, still and always, they just think you are now extremely creepy and will always forget her name because she is basic). All of these shenanigans, while you should have been focused on your actual job of acting, you capricious motherfucker!

I have an idea if you would like to revive your DOA career, while also needing to have the general public remember who that dullard Succubus is, since I assume that was one of the tenants of this God forsaken contract you carelessly signed. Now stay with me, BDF, this may get complicated because your handlers haven't programmed you to make a good decision in years so this may seem entirely foreign- Lay this shit bare! Let me explain:

By admitting this was a completely misguided PR move, it allows you to explain why you let your career go down the shitter. You were paired with someone who you don't like, and is in fact the opposite of what you would want (if that part of your brand was ever true 🤷‍♀️) and it ate away your soul, causing you to become a lazy actor in sub-par roles- essentially, a learned helplessness response. You may have tried getting out of it, but a contract is a contract and this little half tutonic twit offered entrée into the lucrative Portuguese market. (But, surprise, it turned out someone was sold a load of goods because she is not known in her own country either.)

And people hate each other all the time in your biz. Let I remind you the nicest guy in Hollywood- Tom Hanks- has beef with the kindest man in Hollywood- Henry Winkler- maybe putting the sweetest man in Hollywood-Ron Howard- in the middle, but I digress. My point is, if you can't get people talking about you two as a couple, having you be in a fake relationship and hating each other is a much more interesting and intriguing story.

She would get her attention, as much as she says she doesn't want it. She has yet to gain traction as your "wife", but they may be able to sell her as the failed situationship that made Chris Evans so unhappy, he self-sabotaged his career and reputation. Afterall, there is no such thing as bad publicity, right? Marriage is so boring, and the girl is already so fucking dull. This would at least give her an aire of mystery for a bit. She will, of course, waste the opportunity yet again, but it gives her a better foundation for her to fall from.

You could not only justify why you couldn't act your way out of a paper bag the last few years, but also why you physically looked like shit, how the GQ article, and even some of the SMA spread, was a cry for help, how your team kept you ringfenced in their highly controlled projects because you weren't playing the part of happy hubby well enough, and seemed to keep you emotionally and possible financially weak to more easily bend to their will. It could even explain why you needed ancillary help for your good boy image from Jinx, ASP (and that undeserved, bought and paid for Spirit of Service award), as well as the Audi deal giving you the illusion of class and gravitas.

No one would look at you askance if you fired your whole team (including that Scientologist stylist) for thinking any of this was a good idea and continuing it far beyond being deemed an unmitigated disaster at all levels and becoming toxic and unhealthy. I am sure a new, better team, would relish the chance to orchestrate your redemption and not use you as their patsy. Of course this can all be done much more diplomatically than I am laying it out here because I assume part of the fear in all of this is the wrath of the evil 3-letter-acronym luxury brand empire.

Also, take the opportunity to break ties with ASP and any other clout chasing "friends". It is an embarrament, represents everything wrong in our shit society and nothing good can come of it anymore. It should have died long ago.

This may also help promote the three movies you have coming out in 2025 by grading you on a curve. Instead of "what the fuck is he doing?", it can be more like "considering the trauma he experienced while filming I give him credit for at least getting up out of bed and saying his lines. Here's to better things in the future with his new team- they seem to believe in him. I hope he believes in himself, too."

To help with all of this, get into some form of real treatment, because ultimately, Boston Dumb Fuck, I worry about your coping and decision making skills. You were around 40 when you agreed to this, for whatever reason, and since then, you have been digging a hole so deep that I can barely hear or see you anymore. You have so much work to do on yourself just to get back to sea level, let alone climb the mountain of human integrity, character and authenticity.

I can wish that part of this redemption is a sincere apology, with an offer of real amends, to your former fans for the cruel attempts at scapegoating and gaslighting when they simply expressed what was the God's honest truth. Some may come back, many won't, but that isn't the point. You hurt people whether you intended to or not. Are you okay with that?

But you you seem to be a coward and have settled into this anxious existence so I doubt any of the above will come to fruition. Maybe this was all a cash grab so you can build your pot pottery shed in the woods and disappear for good. God knows, this business is a cesspool and has nothing to do with creativity so no one would really blame you. Just a shame you are okay going out as a creepy, privleged, hypocritical, insincere joke.

But hey, Boston Dumb Fuck, prove me wrong. I triple dog dare you!

[twistsandtwizzles]

I Watched So You Don't Have To: Stars on Mars

You may have seen that Adam Rippon is one of the cast members on the new FOX reality show, Stars on Mars. I knew this information but had no plans to watch this show, until this week when I needed to turn something on tv that would take up 5% of my brain power or less. And this fit the brief exactly.

In case you are also mildly interested in what this weird show is about and what Adam is doing on it, but don't want to let it take up even 3% of your brain power, don't worry, I am here for you! Read on for a recap of Stars on Mars: Episode 1.

We open on William Shatner very dramatically telling us that twelve celebrities are going to participate in an “experiment” to find out if they can “survive life on Mars” (aka a month somewhere in Australia). The winner will earn the title of Brightest Star in the Galaxy and this made me laugh out loud because that’s it? They don’t even get any money? Just a title that is also found on a fourth grade science fair participation trophy?

Anyway, Shatner - who has very clearly not gone to Australia and is recording this somewhere in his house - tells us that this simulation will be 24 days long, and will show us which celebrities are the strongest, the brightest, the bravest, and who can handle the stress when the food runs out. We’re treated to a compilation of clips during this portion, then Shatner says, “This is: Starsssssss on Marssssssss” and the way I typed this quote does not do it justice.

We’re now introduced to the astronauts as they trudge across the surface of “Mars” into the “Hab” where they will be living. The first astronaut is Christopher Mintz-Plasse, aka McLovin’ from Superbad, and we cut to a talking head where Christopher says he’s been called McLovin for 16 years and is kind of tired of it; unfortunately for him it is what I will call him for the entirety of this recap.

We get a tour of the hab, which basically looks like every space movie you’ve ever seen, and we are introduced to the lady-voiced-AI thing that is going to be the main communication tool/voice-over element on this show. McLovin marvels that “a lot of money went into this” which, I’m not sure I agree, but okay.

Next in the hab: Ronda Rousey, “Champion Fighter” followed closely by Tom Schwartz from Vanderpump Rules who the VO tells us is “currently known for Scandavol.” Full disclosure that I have only ever seen five minutes of VPR so this man is a complete stranger to me - but I do live in the culture enough to know that his name is “Schwartz” and not “Tom.” Schwartz explains his show to McLovin, boiling it down to “people work in a bar and have sex with each other.” McLovin says, “Well, we’re not doing that here. I don’t think.”

Next up: Tallulah Willis, “Daughter of Bruce and Demi” and Adam Rippon, “Olympic Figure Skater” and the entire reason I’m even watching this show. Then Porsha Williams Guobadia, “Real Housewife” and another complete stranger to me (look, how can I find time for Bravo reality shows when I have to watch old figure skating programs on YouTube?); Tinashe, “R&B Recording Artist” who I know mostly as a regular Who? Weekly subject; Ariel Winter, “Award-Winning Actor from Modern Family” (she was the middle child); Marshawn Lynch & Richard Sherman, “Teammates and NFL Legends” who are introduced as a unit but it is unclear if they are playing as a team or not; and Lance Armstrong, “Cyclist” and look, I am not happy about his presence either.

Lance is greeted warmly by everyone in the room and Ariel gives a talking head geeking out about how Lance is a real astronaut. She makes the mistake of mentioning this to Porsha who does not appear to correct her. Unknown if Porsha was just trying not to embarrass Ariel, or if she has no idea who Lance Armstrong is either and thinks he could plausibly be an astronaut.

Shatner sends a message to the celebs explaining that every 48 hours a celebrity who is not “mission critical” will be “extracted” (he then helpfully clarifies that this just means “sent home”). He also explains that the “Base Commander” is the most powerful role in the hab as the commander is basically in charge of everything, and the commanders will be re-appointed every two days.

The celebs are instructed to select a Base Commander and we get our very first Adam Rippon Talking Head! Adam explains that everyone is figuring each other out and that no one wanted to be the first base commander. We cut to the celebs desperately pointing at each other and trying to peer pressure others into the role. Then they are informed that the Base Commander gets their own room, and Roger nominates Marshawn, who was worried about fitting into his bunk earlier. Marshawn accepts.

The first mission for the astronaut celebrities: to rescue their 12th crewmember who is trapped in a pod on the surface. Marshawn sends Lance and Ronda out for the rescue while the rest of the crew watches their progress via monitor. Adam excitedly says of the outdoor footage, “Oh my god, it looks like Mars,” and again, I’m not sure I agree, but I’m happy that he’s happy.

To no one’s surprise the rescue mission is successful and completely lacking in any kind of drama. Natasha Leggero, “Comedian,” is the final celebrity to join the hab.

Marshawn is instructed to divide the daily task list. He sends Porsha and Tallulah to sort the foods and rations (Lady Hab Voice pops up to note that there will be no resupply of the rations during their stay and I'm sure this will be a major issue later in the series).

After a few shots of people doing their assigned tasks we cut to Adam, finally, since he is the only part of the show I care about. He and Ariel are dusting “the patches” which are basically Mars-themed Scout badges. Adam Talking Heads that he assumes the patches are probably something they will earn on missions throughout the show. It is unclear if the show thinks this is some sort of amazingly smart deduction on Adam’s part or if it, like me, assumes that Adam has watched a reality competition show at least once in his life and simply took the very tiny step needed to reach this conclusion.

Adam tells Ariel that he actually loves cleaning and organizing, and she excitedly says she does too. Adam asks, with true joy in his eyes, if she likes folding things. She says laundry is her favorite. I do not understand these people.

We cut between some other small talk and talking heads. Marshawn and Lance argue about who is more of an athlete, and how Marshawn did not throw Lance’s doping in his face during this conversation I will truly never know.

Adam has clearly been tasked by production to explain the basics of this game in his talking heads, because he again tells us that they are “trying to figure each other out and learning to work together” since “that will be important the longer they stay in the game.”

A bunch of snippets of general “get to know you” convos: the group chats about how famous Tallulah’s parents are; Porsha and Natasha chat about their kids; Lance and Marshawn and Ronda chat about sports again; Lance feels weird about sharing a bathroom; Ariel admits to Porsha and Tinashe that she has confused Lance with Neil Armstrong. Then everyone goes to bed. Natasha says, “Goodnight honey,” to Adam and it makes sense those two would be fast friends.

An alarm goes off in the middle of the night and Shatner appears to tell them that “Martian Dust” is headed their way and has already knocked their comms satellite over. They need to go repair it, and if they do it they will earn a patch. Everyone seems totally wowed by this patch information so maybe we were supposed to think that Adam was a genius earlier.

Tallulah is chosen to be a mission specialist and is staying behind with Marshawn while everyone heads to the surface. “Let’s save this satellite!” Adam says. He looks great in this space suit.

Adam’s talking head is back with more general reality show basics, namely that even though they are stressed about this mission they have to focus and do a good job, because ultimately “the name of the game is that someone has to go home.”

The celebs walk out into a windstorm and Tallulah and Marshawn direct the crew in repairing the satellite. Adam says that “this is not what (he) signed up for” but Adam, I’m pretty sure it is. 

Once again this mission is successful and not all that dramatic, even as all the celebs tell us how stressed they all are and how hard this was. (Assembling an Ikea dresser looks far more difficult than this satellite repair job.) Natasha does say at one point that she was trying to stay out of the way in the “loser area” along with McLovin and Adam. 

McLovin says he thinks they all would have died if it was really Mars, and I suppose this statement is technically true but also it’s kind of like when I cut through an empty parking lot after my driver’s test and the examiner said, “if there were cars here you’d be running them over right now.” I would not have done that if there were cars there?? And these people would not be asked to repair a satellite on actual Mars. Anyway.

Marshawn and Tallulah are told to identify the three astronauts least critical to mission success. This is revealed by Marshawn calling the “Mission Critical” celebrities one-by-one back into the hab and handing them - hold onto your hats because none of us saw this prize coming - a patch.

The three least mission critical celebrities: Adam, McLovin, and Schwartz. McLovin says, “aw man, the three fragile white boys!” as they give each other a group hug. They are then each asked to explain to the Mission Critical celebs why they should stick around. 

McLovin says he didn’t participate in the mission because he was removing himself from the situation since there were too many people trying to do the job.

Adam says he’s mission critical because he’s one of the hottest people there and “I think that’s important for any kind of challenge that we do. I’m just being honest.” This earns a big laugh and applause from the already-safe crew, and someone says, “He’s right!” LOL.

Schwartz reminds them all that he was the one that actually made a major repair on the satellite and the group immediately says, “oh yeah” and lets him into the hab. He gives Adam a big hug and assures him, “You are very hot.”

So that leaves Adam and McLovin as our bottom two. The group decides that Adam is more mission critical than McLovin, which means our favorite Olympic-figure-skater-turned-astronaut gets let back into the hab, and that I have to watch this show for another week.

McLovin wanders to the extraction point and gives an exit interview from the suddenly calm Mars surface without his space helmet on, and it’s hilarious how soon after elimination the faux-Mars premise is dropped.

Tune in next week (or don’t) for some arguing and more “space” adventures that appear to include a fire in the hab and something to do with a bunch of water on the Mars surface that I have many questions about! The previews indicate that Adam will eventually get a headset to lead a mission at some point, so we'll how that goes. See you next time.

[welcome-to-green-hills]

Happy Easter Mystery! :3 (gives hugs while stuffing my face with chocolate because I'm a chocoholic XD ) Do you want another potential Sonic 3 scenario? :3 I thought this potential one up yesterday...think hypothetically in the middle of the story ;)

It was eerie as Tom and Maddie maneuvered through the halls of the old research labs. It was...so spooky.

Something full of the most modern tech, that modern day phone and technology companies would be jealous of...yet fully abandoned...

"Jeez..." Tom muttered, trying to break the silence that was quietly freaking him out, "To think that 50 years ago, there was all this...tech, makes the likes of Star Trek outdated...it's so odd."

"Oh?" Maddie responded, trying to humour the situation, "And...the fact that our three boys are aliens from across the galaxy is not at all...odd to you?"

Tom gave a small smirk, "Alright, alright."

Maddie giggled a bit, readjusting the little backpack full of some of Tails' helpful gadgets on her shoulder.

Although, mentioning their boys...Tom was now stuck in thought.

"Maddie...do you think..."

Maddie held his hand, "I know...I'm worried to. But...our boys, their...very smart. They've been in this sort of scenario before - not exactly of course, but still - and...if they DO need our help, then, they can just call us. Their smart kids, and they have each others backs."

"Right. Just...well...you saw what that...hedgehog did to them back at the house..."

Maddie shuddered at the memory. She couldn't deny what happened...

Sneaking through the rooms, Tom saw something on an old table. A old rectangle block...picking it up - it was an old VHS tape. MAN, now did Tom feel old...

But then he saw the title on the side, written in big ink.

'PROJECT SHADOW - CASE STUDY 8'

"...Project Shadow..."

"Shadow..." Maddie asked, "Isn't...that the name of the black Hedgehog Sonic told us about?"

Tom looked around, and saw an old, dusty monitor in the corner, with an old VHS system attached and plugged in. Something told him to put the tape in.

And he did.

The TV switched on, Tom and Maddie got in front to watch it.

'"Is this on- it's on? Oh! Yes! Project Shadow Case Study, part 8.'"

An man appeared on the screen, dressed in a white lab coat, and he had a moustache...a moustache that slightly resembled...

Tom and Maddie dared not speak up his name...but shared a glance at each other.

"'His vita- I mean! It's vitals are running perfectly normal! It's almost as though this creature was like us humans! It's a big breakthrough! Our next sta- M-Maria!'"

A girl ran past, behind the old man. Presumably Maria.

A teen girl she seemed, with beautiful golden hair, dressed in a blue dress and cardigan, and had the giggle of an angel.

"'Sorry Grandfather! Shadow's idea!'"

"'No it wasn't.'"

Tom and Maddie noticed a...familiar face walking up to Maria. A black hedgehog...with read markings on his quills. Was it...

It was.

Shadow.

His face showed much more...happier marks. His eyes were gentle, innocent...and a smile was on his face.

Tom was stuck, looking at Shadow's face...he gulped a little, somewhat anxious.

"'Alright you two! Run off now. Haha, I'll join you in a moment, I need to record this-'"

"'What is this?'" The black hedgehog asked, walking up to a gadget - an old record player.

"'Press it Shadow!'"

"'M-Maria! Don't encourage him-!'"

'Lord almighty, feel my temperature rising-'

"'Grandpa? You listen to-!"

A laugh could be heard coming from the black hedgehog...a laugh...that tugged the heartstrings of the two humans watching the screen.

"'Oh!!! No! don't touch it-! Uh- E-End of case study!'"

And the video stopped.

Tom and Maddie were frozen, watching it. They both could feel the mixed emotions between them. Maddie then turned to her husband, who was still staring at the now blank screen.

"...Tom...?"

"...Sorry, it's just...it's...seeing...if that is really...who we think it is, then why does...he reminds me of..."

"...Sonic."

"...Yeah."

Maddie hugged Tom's arm, rubbing his hand supportively. Tom just shook his head and looked at her. His eyes were pained...

"Just...what the heck happened to make him become...this."

👉🥺👈 Vinyl lover Shadow, my beloved 👉🥺👈 My heart ❤️🥺❤️

[checkoutmybookshelf]

Rereading The Fellowship of the Ring for the First Time in Fifteen Years

When JRR Tolkien names a chapter, he doesn't beat about the bush. We literally met like ten new characters and a bunch of old ones in this chapter. I'm also over here wondering what the hell kind of literary circle Tolkien was running to be THIS specific about the numbers and types of parties that get thrown in this book, because once it's clear that Frodo has and will continue to survive and recover from his enstabbening, literally the first thing Elrond does is throw the equivalent of an Elf rager. So let's talk Book 2, Chapter, "Many Meetings."

And so it is that at ten o'clock in the morning on October the twenty-fourth, Frodo Baggins wakes up in the House of Elrond, having been enstabbened seventeen days ago and having lost three days of time right at the end of that because Strider (who I guess as of this chapter we're calling Aragorn) let the dang wound close with a splinter still in there. It's a damn good thing that Elves are magic, because infection control and antibiotics do not seem to be a goddamn thing in Middle Earth, and having to *checks notes* dig for a splinter of a dagger that went in the shoulder and traveled heart-wards for almost a month is gonna a surgical nightmare, especially when you don't have x-rays to pinpoint the location and give you somewhere to START. But I'm being cynical over here; Elrond successfully managed to get the shard out of Frodo, and he's healing, although this little piece from Gandalf is interesting:

He is not even half through yet, and what he will come to in the end not even Elrond can foretell. Not to evil, I think. He may become a glass filled with a clear light for eyes to see that can.

Gandalf isn't even being subtle about the transformation that Frodo is already undergoing here, and it's interesting to me that "a glass filled with a clear light" is the metaphor Tolkien chooses, especially given the contrast with Bilbo's "butter scraped over too much bread." Bilbo is very much embodied and still somewhat himself in that metaphor, if the thinnest, least parts of himself. In the Frodo metaphor though, Frodo is GONE. His self has disappeared in favor of being a light and glass. He is transparent and he is gone. Which I find very interesting in terms of what is being held up as virtuous and what is being held up as falling to a given measure of evil. To be a light is to surrender the self, and like...bro, why can't we be both?

And SPEAKING of Gandalf in this opening part of the chapter, it's nice to finally see his ass again, but I don't actually think I'd want to wake up with his ass next to my sickbed, because the second goddamn thing out of his mouth is scolding Frodo for "all the absurd things [he has] done since [he] left home." And like... Broski doski. Even meant affectionately, even said in relief, maybe don't put the poor hobbit in a position to APOLOGIZE ten second after waking up from almost dying.

AND ANOTHER THING: Frodo talking in his sleep is one way to get information, and it's fair enough. But the WAY TOO CASUAL "...and it has not been hard for me to read your mind and memory" need to be addressed here, because QUITE LITERALLY WHY??? Strider was there and then you had three other hobbits to question. You could even ask Tom Bombadil or 3/4 of Bree if you need more information, and I would do ANY AND ALL OF THAT before casually reading an ally's mind without consent! This wizard is RAPIDLY falling off my list of favorite characters for shit like this...

But at least Gandalf goes a little ways toward breaking the consistent-to-this-point pattern of people withholding information from Frodo, because we get not only a little baby infodump about the Rangers and Strider, but also some history about who and what the Black Riders are, and the composition of the Dark Lord of Mordor's forces. Gandalf also goes out of his way to assure Frodo that Rivendell is safe and that the Elves here are super badass and the Ringwraiths can't get in to finish the job, which is very comforting. Gandalf also has the courtesy to fill Frodo--and us readers, since we missed all of this too--about the details of what the hell the raging river was and how everyone got to Rivendell in the end.

After a wee bit of a nap, Frodo and Sam go find the bigass party that Elrond is throwing because he wrecked shop on the Ringwraiths at the Ford of Bruinen, at which they will be guests of honor. Once they show up, Pippin--who I will put $5 on the table right now to say is at least a half pint deep already--announces, "Here is our noble cousin! Make way for Frodo, Lord of the Ring!" And Gandalf immediately shushes him, because as Pippin freely admits, Gandalf "thinks [he] needs keeping in order." Which... Sorry Pips, but I have to agree with the graybeard at this point on that one. You're a wee bit of a menace with a big mouth.

So this party has a long list of esteemed guests, and for brevity's sake, you're getting this in list form:

A metric ton of Elves

Glorfindel (who is excused from the metric ton by virtue of the fact that he saved the hobbits' asses)

Gandalf (who is allowed to mix despite VERY sketchy ethics around mind reading)

Elrond (who is hosting)

Arwen (who is the host's daughter and Aragorn's big fat crush)

Gloin (who is talkative AF for a dwarf and gives Frodo the cliffsnotes version of The Hobbit as well as how everyone's doing)

Bilbo (who of course has decided he hates parties in his curmudgeonly old age)

Most of the this party is Gloin catching Frodo and the readers up on how everyone from The Hobbit (and their children and grandchildren) are doing, which honestly was kind of lovely to hear. It's really lovely that for the most part, everyone is enjoying their retirement and their kids are active in the world and actively keeping the forces of Mordor at bay. Standouts include Beorn's son Grimbeorn and his men keeping their lands safe, and Bard the Bowman's grandson is ruling the survivors of Laketown.

Another standout--but for reasons that mean I need to whack Tolkien on the nose with a rolled-up newspaper--is Bombur, who apparently has reached a girth of such epic proportions that it takes six dwarves to move him. Guys, I have basic reading comprehension. I can see that this is intended affectionately and probably for comedy, but like...BOMBUR IS A WHOLE-ASS PERSON, WHY IS THE ONLY THING ABOUT HIM THAT HE'S FAT??? WHAT ELSE IS HE UP TO? Is he running an armchair version of the Great Dwarven Bakeoff? Is he writing a cookbook? Give me SOMETHING other than "Bombur's still fat." You cannot define a person by a single trait like this, and given the care with which Tolkien rounds out his other characters, it's jarring AF and I hate it.

The other sour note in this recounting is the fact that Balin, Ori, and Oin are SUPER missing, and at this point I believe are already dead in Moria, but Gloin and the rest of the Dwarves don't know that yet.

Having caught up on all the Dwarven gossip, we finally get Frodo and Bilbo reuniting...and the Ring freaking RUINING what should have been a really nice moment:

When he had dressed, Frodo found that while he slept the ring has been hung around his neck on a new chain, light but strong. Slowly he drew it out. Bilbo put out his hand. But Frodo quickly drew back the Ring. To his distress and amazement he found that he was no longer looking at Bilbo; a shadow seemed to have fallen between them, and through it he found himself eyeing a little wrinkled creature with a hungry face and bony groping hands. He felt a desire to strike him.

This more than anything else tells us that Bilbo did not carry the Ring for so many years unscathed. There is something of Gollum in this little vision, and it's tragic and telling for a few reasons. First, Frodo has not yet internalized pity, as Gandalf warned him to way back in like...oh my god, was it chapter 2? He has no pity for Gollum, and in this moment, he doesn't seem to have pity for the toll the Ring took on Bilbo either. Some of that might be the Ring's influence, and some of it might be a semiconscious revulsion and fear about what the Ring is already doing through it's influence on Frodo. This interaction is probably also colored by the Ring wanting to stay with Frodo, and Bilbo has asked for it, so the Ring's natural assholery is coming out here. This is also a pretty terrifying yardstick for readers. Bilbo had the ring for like 60 years and used it as a party trick. It wasn't really awake, it wasn't really trying to do anything, and it did THIS to Bilbo. Frodo has had the ring in its active state for...I dunno, a month? And he's already losing control over his ability to control himself when the Ring is being assertive. What would (or did?) the Ring show Bilbo about Frodo? Either way, this makes it HELLA clear that Frodo is in real danger and it's going to be an order of magnitude worse than what has happened to Bilbo.

And I think Bilbo kind of knows this, or has a sense of the scale, because he aplogizes:

I am sorry: sorry you have come in for this burden; sorry about everything. Don't adventures ever have an end? I suppose not.

So I'm not a girl who is big on apologies. Your sorrow does not change reality, and it doesn't meaningfully ameliorate the practicalities of dealing with the hand we've been dealt. But what I do like here is that Bilbo is quietly acknowledging the difference between the neatness of a narrative, which often focuses on adventure and artificially neatens them to have clear beginnings and endings, and life, which is much more of a wibbly wobbly timey wimey ball of stuff without clear beginnings or endings. That is going to resonate, and it's meta in a way that the English major in me adores. Tolkien knows what he's doing here; this is nearly a bastardization of an ekphrasis (where a work of art in one medium is described in another and generally functions to call out the strengths and weaknesses of both to highlight the differences). Except instead of two works of art, Tolkien is comparing narrative to life. My little English major heart is happy, even as the hard, practical side of me is like, "don't bother apologizing, Bilbo. Help or don't, but knock off the thoughts and prayers."

Well, after that mood killer, the party is saved for Frodo by songs, including one chanted by Bilbo that goes on for four straight pages. The evening slowly winds to a close after that, but not before we get a nice little moment between Aragorn and Arwen, and a big old eye pierce through Frodo from Arwen.

That's about where I'm going to leave this one, because up next is the council meeting, and I might need a stiff drink and a party to psych myself up for what I've often heard described as one of the more lengthy and difficult chapters of this book.

[pollyna]

AO3 First Lines Tag Game

Tagged by: @oftincturedwords (thank you for the tag! it looks like fun 👀)

Rules: Share the first lines of ten of your most recent fanfics and tag ten people. If you have written fewer than ten, don’t be shy and share anyway.

Did you see the drummer's hair? (wip, top gun, halo/phoenix)

Three a.m. in the morning, and even though the mission was over two months ago, insomnia clings to her body like a second skin she can shed away. It doesn't even matter how many times she calls Bradley in the middle of the night to make sure he's alive and she doesn't lose her best friend once and for all.

2. The adventures of Mr. Iceman and Baby Goose (wip, top gun, gen)

Mav says is good because they're going to bond, Carole nods and smiles and Bradley says Mr. Iceman moma always takes me to the candy shop on Sunday and Ice knows the kid is totally bullshitting him but then Carole asks if they can take some strawberries one and how Ice can say no, at that point?

3. You got MIA before our first (second) date (wip, top gun, warlock/cyclone)

Sicily sounds and looks like a dream after months of forced cohabitation in some bumfuck port in the northern part of Russia, with people who wanted them there even less than they did. Despite its name, Archangel doesn't have anything of the holiness the name promised if one doesn't consider the white of the snow that never seems to end, and when it does, it paves the way for the ice and wind. And even if it's just twenty-four hours before their new assignment somewhere in the world, everyone is hoping for a place with lenient weather. Something in the air makes Warlock carefully optimistic.

4. The good parts (complete, top gun, pre-relationship)

Ice knows there is something important because Slider's head is against his shoulder, but the man is watching the flowers on the table and not the match he had spent all day talking about. And when Ice says he spent all day talking about the match, he means Slider even doodled the teams' logos on his notes, but he has the nagging sensation something did happen between class and when he was on a date with Mav.

5. My kind of love (complete, top gun, halo/phoenix)

Callie doesn't really care about Valentine's day, she never has and probably never will. (When she was in primary school, Valentine's Day was when her favourite teacher baked chocolate cupcakes for the entire class and created silly and funny math exercises that always gave heart-shaped results.)

6. Say it first (complete, top gun, iceman/maverick)

Maverick is observant—maybe not all the time and about everything and everyone around him, but when he wants, he can notice things that most people miss. And Iceman Kazansky? He ends up on his radar for so many different reasons, and Mav can't stop noticing stuff about him, from his favourite type of gum to that little nagging fact that Slider's always asking Ice if it's okay to touch him.

7. Oh, you're the best friend that I ever had. (complete, top gun, iceman&slider)

It's a random morning when Ice writes down I miss flying and doesn't add anything else. Slider doesn't even know if he was supposed to see it or not, but he would take him up himself if Tom wasn't so tired these days. He can barely walk and has to use the wheelchair for most things, and it breaks Ron knowing his best friend is missing the only thing nobody can give him.

8. Halfway home. (complete, ncis, di nozzo/mcgee & di nozzo/david)

Sleep deprivation tastes like coffee with too much sugar on Timothy's lips, looks like three-day stubble and sounds like someone who shallowed an entire fucking encyclopaedia that's getting spewed up all together. It's hell.  

9. Lay be me. (complete, top gun, iceman/maverick)

It has been a day, or maybe a week or an entire year, and Ice can feel the tiredness setting in his bones, the way it makes space in every fragment of his being because he's simply done. Tired, over-stressed, over-caffeinated and sleep-deprived but he knows it's going to be worth it all in the long run, even if every day is a fight against people and his own capacity of not snapping and punching some fucking Senator in the face. 

10. Rise up (complete, top gun, callie halo shen)

The first punch feels liberatory and she feels even better when Bang doesn't stay down. The second punch is another hit because the man thinks he's a big deal but she can't remember him passing a single self-defence class.

No pressure tag: @redhead-writes, @the-ace-with-spades, @semperhuggs, @bearsinpotatosacks, @destinedtobeloved, @icemankazansky, @derpinathebrave, @ettaberrytea, @xihe1874,, @struggling-with-space

[notasapleasure]

Safe, 8 episodes (2018), part 1/2

Oh god, let’s get this over with then. I did already do a kind of deranged liveblog of my response to this show, so if you want more vagueing about the stupid plot/characters/concept then head over to that tag (#liveblogging safe). Or just watch it on Netflix yourself, but do make sure to lobotomise yourself with a screwdriver first.

Neil Chahal: beautiful, low-key unhinged, mysterious employment, tight chinos, lovely dressing gown, and you don’t want to know what it is that’s going to revive his ailing marriage to Zoe the French teacher!

Episode 1

We get the distinct impression immediately that everyone in his family finds him exhausting and wishes he would Just Stop. At first, it’s not clear precisely what’s so annoying, but he rises to the occasion pretty quickly.

NEEL. Sorry buddy, that’s your name now. (kneel)

He wants to treat his nineteen-year-old son Chris like a grown-up, so he’s frank with him (no, he’s NEEL </dad joke>) at the family dinner (while wife and daughter have gone away to sigh extravagantly elsewhere)

His son is less blasé about this than he expects.

The next day, Chris and his girlfriend Jenny (daughter of the mc, Tom, let’s not even get started on that guy) are missing.

DRESSING GOWN. FLUFFY. CLEAVAGE.

Chris said he was heading to Ioan’s house.

Oh hohoho wouldn’t you like to know dressing-gown boy he’s the year 12 [sixteen/seventeen-year-old] kid your wife is screwing but don’t worry there won’t be any consequences

Episode 2

Neel's very bad no good day continues, also he is ALWAYS just...hanging round at home waitting for bad news at the door

First up it’s the police with a warrent to search the place because his wife’s been arrested for being a suspected paedophile...

Tiny little meltdown of throwing things around :’)

Then it’s his bloody neighbour again asking after Chris and Jenny, who are still awol. Neel gives a bravado display of the insecurities of middle aged masculinity.

I want to say that it’s astounding to think he might be the kind of husband who ever did, but it’s actually not unimaginable. Neel is bitter, but it almost feels like having a teenage boy in the house has made him weird about his masculinity in a way he wasn’t before. Or maybe it’s the suspicion that his wife is fucking a different teenage boy. Anyway.

I don’t know how many times I can say that this man just makes me really sad? He seemed so desperate to talk to his family earlier and clearly just. doesn’t know how to. Acting like it’s FINE that his son doesn’t talk to him about things and that’s what he’s expect because Men Don’t Talk About Things!!

He’s not worried about Chris, but he does agree to let Jenny’s dad have a look round Chris’s room because of a couple of alarming texts.

The next screenshots are mainly for the hands on hips and trouser hoik, but also, for all my complaints about this show, we know this guy, don’t we? Sharing uncomfortable details about expensive home renovation when you don’t really know anything about him or his family? And then it’s not just his family who wish he’d stop talking. It’s strangers too. oh Neel. You’ve forgotten how to interact with people. too long wfh.

Did Chris go out on the Vespa?

Train times, probably, but Neel is sceptical. Afterwards, Marc Warren says what bad vibes the place has. And if Marc Warren thinks you have bad vibes, well, yeowch.

Episode 3

Chris is still missing, but by now we know he’s very much dead, and the family trying to hide the body is hilariously bad at it.

Meanwhile, Sophie, the main cop and sort of girlfriend of Tom, tells Zoe they now believe she’s been set-up and they’re trying to find out who would want to paint her as a paedophile. Neel looks moody in the rattan sofa:

is this like when you have a rowdy pet and you have to banish them to the garden when visitors come round?

Even Neel and Zoe’s daughter is starting to miss her big brother now! Who will take her to the cinema?

(Look! Neel has work to do! Do we know what it is? No)

Idk man. Is it meant to be messaging about how some lax continental child-rearing style Neel and Zoe (she is French, after all) followed has led to this situation, where they seem unconcerned by their teenager’s absence and the problem is more ‘you need someone to take you to the cinema’ rather than ‘your brother isn’t just giving me the cold shoulder he’s actually ignoring his whole family’? He did offer still, but man, pretty sure his daughter hates him. Should probably have gone ahead with the divorce before her exams, babe, sticking around isn’t helping.

Later on, he hears Zoe leaving Chris voicemails and does seem to share her concern a little?

---

End of Part 1. I’m splitting this into two posts, just in case it gets unwieldy with the screenshots - Chris’ body is found next episode, so there’s a bit more of the Chahals.

[cleoenfaserum]

Dead Ringers

Season 1 Episode 3 Recap & Review

Video of S1E3 not available.

Pushed to the Brink

LISTEN or READ or LISTEN&READ

When Beverly and Genevieve are asleep in bed together, episode 3 of Dead Ringers sees Elliot come in and whisper to Beverly, asking what Genevieve’s like.

We then see something that looks like a small pink embryo growing into a foetus. Elliot looks at something through a microscope and curses out loud.

Tom and Elliot arrive at the party for the opening of their clinic and Tom realises she’s on edge. It’s the opening of the twins’ clinic and everyone is there including Rebecca and Susan.

While they have drugs, Elliot remarks to Genevieve that her relationship with Beverly is going well.Later, Elliot keeps eyeing the couple while Tom speaks to Joseph. Joseph feels that Tom’s work with the clinic should be kept quiet because of his unemployability.

While Beverly’s brushing her teeth, Elliot asks Beverly if she wants something new (she means someone new). She then says Beverly hasn’t really had Genevieve until Elliot’s had her too.

At their glossy new clinic, Joseph tells Beverly she has guests booked for the whole day. The board and trustees will be watching them for a few days, so he tells the Mantles to keep that in mind.

Elliot mans the embryology research floor while Rebecca watches. Beverly does a c-section for a woman while an audience watches. Both, research and birthing work goes on. Elliot introduces the menopause delaying surgery that she will be conducting on a 24-year-old girl. One of the audience, a middle aged woman, asks if a 20-year-old’s tissue can be put into her. That’s exactly the kind of idea Elliot wants to explore.

One of Beverly’s patients suffers yet another miscarriage. While going to take a break, a staff member throws a bucket of blood on Beverly accusing her of working with a murderer. She goes to have a smoke anyway. Later, Rebecca talks about this group of people that keeps attacking any organisation attached to the Parker name. Beverly’s not happy about the incident but Rebecca believes there’s not much moral difference between those people and herself. Everyone plays their role in the system.

On their own, Beverly admits to Elliot that she’s struggling. Beverly’s patient from earlier is there and she introduces Elliot to her. When she mentions Elliot’s research, the woman offers up herself for research on miscarriage.

Beverly finds one of her patients, Zhu Ye, on the floor, in pain. She refuses to get on the bed or let Beverly near to check the baby’s heart. Beverly gives her the gel and apparatus and stands looking the other way. She instructs the woman on how to use the instrument and find the heartbeat.

While the twins get ready, Elliot says she wants them to go out to celebrate together but Beverly has a thing with Genevieve. When she agrees she’s shit at parties, Elliot offers to go as her. They swap places and Elliot makes Beverly seem friendly and witty. They even get into an argument about what ‘Elliot’ thinks about Genevieve. Genevieve arrives and automatically reaches for the real Beverly, which makes her friends laugh as they think it’s the other way around. She catches on and later tells Elliot not to ambush her with this swapping. The twins then have to go deliver a baby and Elliot’s annoyed that Genevieve is accompanying them.

While Beverly guides Zhu Ye into giving birth without them touching her, Genevieve watches from outside. Elliot watches Beverly with Genevieve again. Later, the couple go to Genevieve’s place where Beverly sees Sammy, who Genevieve calls her baby brother. He comes over when he’s had his heart broken. After they have sex, Genevieve tells Beverly they should have a baby. Later, Sammy tells Genevieve she looks happy.

At home, Greta makes Elliot some food and then packs a bag for Beverly. Apparently, Genevieve called her and has a surprise planned for Beverly. Elliot empties the bag out in anger.

Elliot calls Beverly and pretends to be empathetic about her needs. She asks Beverly about trying for another baby but Beverly doesn’t want to do it like that anymore. When Elliot suggests they spend the weekend figuring it out, Beverly says she can’t.

Beverly finds Genevieve’s surprise really sweet but worries about Elliot as they’ve never been in different cities. Genevieve tries to make Elliot understand and draws a strict boundary with her when she keeps acting out. Elliot tells Beverly not to go but she does anyway.

At the research centre, Elliot takes out her anger on an employee who’s speaking with Tom. She takes Tom, blindfolded, into a dark room and tells him to produce semen. She then puts his sperm into Beverly’s eggs. She hooks up with a man at a club and then brings everyone to her apartment for a party. She tries having sex with him in Beverly’s room but it doesn’t do it for her and she resorts to drinking and doing drugs.

When she starts throwing out Beverly’s things, a woman nearly gets hit by it on the street. She comes upstairs and begins to break things in the home. Elliot enjoys it and eggs her on. They end up doing drugs together on Elliot’s balcony. The woman disses them for being bad quality. The woman says having a twin means getting half an experience while Elliot insists she gets double.

As the woman keeps taunting Elliot about being nothing without her sister, she pushes her off the edge of her balcony. She runs down to help but can’t find her. She gets back to her apartment, hysterical, and calls Beverly.

Elliot wakes up to find Beverly right there next to her. She says Greta’s made breakfast.

The Episode Review

Dead Ringers delivers a great episode with some stunning visuals of the new birthing centre. Story-wise, the episode takes us through Beverly’s growing feelings for Genevieve and Elliot’s growing frustration about the same thing. The end of the episode is a mark of the transformation with Elliot basically committing murder — a good midway point for the series as well.

A couple of things stand out. Jennifer Ehle does a great job as Rebecca particularly in the scene with her monologue about the activist and the system they live in. Her delivery is brilliant and it has a powerful impact. Another is the scene with the patient Zhu Ye and how Beverly deals with her refusal to be touched and handles her with care. Rachel Weisz continues to give two fantastic performances to the point where I often forget it’s one person.

[hyukabean]

introducing: txt!! (a guide for bby moas)

req – here “ahh I’m new to the moa fandom:(( could please give me a run down of who the members are? thank youu! - 🐧”

nana’s notes – omg this took literally half a year, my badddd!! i’ll try and be more active from now on jsdhks- also, sorry this is suuuper long and unnecessarily detailed! also, 10 image limit so no banner this time!!

warning(s) — ps. txt do not have set positions, and though strengths may be mentioned, i have purposefully not named any roles!

unedited.

choi yeonjun (99)

defining features – monolids, “duck lips”, colored hair

lines – hyung line, choi line, yeonjuniz line**, tom & jerry line

starting off with the oldest, we have yeonjun aka jjunie! you’ll probably be able to recognize him by his bright hair colors most easily, (blue, piss yellow, pink, gray-ish, red); the fandom jokes about him going bald because of the excessive dying djshk-.

his, as he dubbed them, “duck lips” and monolids are also “charm points” he is well known for, so watch out for them when looking for him!

jjunie is the only member who currently (0722) has instagram (@/yawnzzn)! he often does modeling for a variety of magazines and such, so you’ll probably become familiar with him sooner rather than later~

despite being the oldest, he’s known for his dual personality (aka, beating up beomgyu one minute and doing aegyo the nex, hence tom & jerry lol-). he’s also quite flirty, and is known to flirt with moawajjunie’s (his fandom name), via fan calls or fansigns frequently.

daniel (his english name lol) definitely deserves the title of “gen-4 it boy”; look out for his dance covers and tiktoks, as well as his raps if you wanna bias him;)

**yeonjun and kai’s mbti used to be enfp, (before kai retook the test and got istp), so you’ll often see the two be referred to as yeonjuniz, when they’re together

choi soobin (00)

defining features – height (tall af-), “pretty doll” lips, oval face shape, DIMPLES

lines – hyung line, choi line

next up we have the leader, soobin aka binnie!! as stated above, you’ll easily be able to find and recognize this cutie since he quite literally towers over the entire industry ^^ (i’m the same height as skz’s hyunjin, so i always thought ‘nah he ain’t that tall, y’all just short’, until i saw them standing next to each other rip o-o). his lips also has an interesting shape and add to his “bunny look”!

soobin is firm but also really soft; his soft but pretty deep voice also adds to this a bit!! he’s the leader, and incredibly well respected by his members, but he’s also a bit shy, so they don’t hesitate on teasing and joking around with him! he’s clearly a sucker for compliments, just look at the idol house episode featuring txt-. during the introduction game you can literally see his face light up after the members stop teasing him and give him actual compliments:(((

he is quite well known for his little obsession with huening kai (not him fangirling for us istg-)!! ever since their trainee days they’ve been close and often sleep next to each other/cuddle! they’re really clingy, and it’s so cute:(( i recommended checking out “weverse” if you wanna see the interactions first hand!

binnie was an mc for music bank with arin from oh my girl for a while, so you check out his interviews as well! soob’s fandom name is ‘soobders’, so remember it if you planning on biasing him!!

choi beomgyu (01)

defining features – pretty side profile, heart-shaped face, freeze haircut, narrow lips

lines – hyung/maknae line**, choi line, tom & jerry line

beomgyu is smack in the middle of txt, with the hyung’s being 99 and 00, and the maknae’s being 02z. he swears up and down that he’s a hyung, but soobin always tells him he’s a maknae, so incase you see him positioned differently at times, you know why:))**, (there’s an interview with him and bin arguing about this lol, he’s like “we’re only 3 months apart” and bin’s like “should've been born earlier, suckcs to suck ig”).

gyu carries hard when it comes to visuals (not that the other members don’t, but he def helps hehe), often getting compliments on his side profile and face shape. his freeze era haircut is also a fan favorite, so go check it out!

he is hands down the “mood maker” of the group, (well him and kai, but kai’s a bit on the “sweeter” side). he’s always joking around with yeonjun and pissing him off, (they call them the ‘tom & jerry’ duo lol), and he’s often thought of as the funniest member, (look up ‘beomgyu kite’ and watch the poor boy have an entire soap opera moment lol). despite this, he has a very pure side to him and you’ll often see him confused in the background; do watch out for him when games are being played, he’s known to be a little cheater.

gyu’s fandom name is “bamtori”, but he also often refers to himself as “tiger” (caue beom means tiger in korean), hence the emoji on twitter, etc. gyu has also talked about his other idol friends on live before! he referenced skz’s i.n., enha’s heesung, and justb’s lim jimin, the 01 liners!

and finally, gyu’s vocals are unmatched, go listen to any song, and bask in the presence of an angle~

kang taehyun (02)

defining features – big eyes n smile, super straight nose bridge (read that it was like 60º somewhere)

lines – maknae line

taehyun is like yeonjun, in the sense that his age throws everyone off lol; he’s the second youngest, and still acts like an old man lol (/hj). plus, being on the “shorter side” (cuz in txt “178cm” is considered short hA-), often gives him the “i’m not here, but i am watching” vibe.

gym rat 101 lmao. he loves to work out, and it shows-, so if muscles do it for you, welp, here you are~

his humor is a bit dry and sarcastic, but always funny, and though it may contrast his demeanor, his obvious care towards the other members makes him a fan favorite (go watch the todo anniversary(?) live with the fireplace and listen to what soonbin says about him)!

hyun’s quite famous for his magic and card tricks, watch any of his old levied with kai and you’ll see lol. he’s also famous for his fantastic falsetto, any song with a high note, he’s there, front and center slaying all the notes (go check out boy in luv, 0x1 = love song, and 20cm)!

hyun’s fandom name is “solomon”, so keep it in mind you plan on stanning!

huening kai kamal (02) – (aka my bias! well i’m really ot5 but… i am just a…….. lil bias to kai)

defining features – cute nose bump, heart shaped lips, unique eyes, moles !!!

lines – maknae line, yeonjuniz line**

we’ve come to the diamond maknae, huening kai! he’s often called a variety of things, huening kai, hyuka, kai, ningdungie, ning ning, kamal (but rarely! fun fact, did you know ‘kamal’ means perfection/completeness/wholeness in arabic? his parent’s knew what why were doing lmao).

he has the cutest bump on his nose which is a charming point, but look out for his height (he’s the second tallest!) and legs! they’re kinda unique, cause he has a thigh gap, even when his legs are together! his hair is usually brown, except for his recent blond and mint, which are now gone, so don’t orient yourself on it too much! what you can definitely track him down with his cute, but loud dolphin laugh! plus his voice is naturally a bit “cute”, since it’s slightly nasally, and he has a lot of natural but also intentional aegyo

he moved a. lot. !! he is mixed, half white, half korean! he was born in hawaii, moved to china and then moved to korea, and can now speak a total of 4 languages, (5 including peng), chinese, english, korean and japanese! he also mentioned knowing a bit of portuguese and that he was lenairng it with his dad recently!

speaking of family! david huening, his father, is also a musician, and released an album in china! (a few of people have asked why both his parents aren't together in recent family pictures, this is because his parents have unfortunately divorced and his father has a new partner). his two sisters, lea and bahiyyih are/were also idols! lea is no longer active as an idol, but does post on youtube and models frequently. bahiyyih recently won second place in the idol reality show girls planet 999, and had debuted in kep1er! (try and find a triplet that looks more similar istg-)

last but not least, kai is quite affectionate, known for his tummy pats, a habit he picked up as a child after losing his pillow, and patting his father’s stomach instead! (watch his and soobs old vlive to hear the full explanation). he’s a connoisseur, watch yeonjun and his asmr video for a full explanation of what soob’s stomach feels like lmao. he also has an obsession is plushies, namely molang, to the point where is bed is overflowing!

kai’s fandom name is ningdungie, so join me and become a fellow ningdungie:))

© hyukabean all rights reserved. - do not translate my work, claim it as your own, and/or repost on any platform

[blossomreed]

Chapter 1 of The Dove and her Rooster [Bradley Bradshaw]

find all the parts here

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A little girl no more than 2 years old was dropped off at the doors of TOPGUN with nothing but a backpack and a little suitcase which had a letter tapped to it. The little girl looked at the woman that was walking away from her with tears in her eyes.

"MOMMA PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME! COME BACK! MOMMA PLEASE!"

The woman ignored the shouts and cries of the little girl as she walked away, not even turning back to look at her and soon she was out of sight.

The little girl tried running after her but she tripped and fell which made her cry even harder. She was hurt, alone and scared. Why did her mommy leave her?

Just then two men were walking towards the school when they noticed the little girl on the floor crying. They looked at eachother a bit confused but quickly walked over to her.

"Hey hey, what's wrong, why are you crying?"

Through the tears streaming down her face the little girl looked at the man with the mustache. He had a uniform on which she remembered her mommy telling her that people with that uniform were nice and could be trusted.

"M-my momma left a-and I hurt my knee."

The little girl lifted her dress just above her knee to show the two men her bleeding knee. The two men looked at eachother with pained expressions before the dark haired man spoke up.

"Do you know where your mommy went?" the little girl shook her head no but pointed to her suitcase, where an envelope was attached.

The brunette man got the letter off the suitcase and quickly read over it.

"Goose, you're not gonna believe this..." the man with the mustache looked at his best friend, "What's wrong Mav?" he had a confused look on his face while the man he called Mav had a shocked expression.

"She's Ice's kid and apparently the only family she got since her mom left her to him."

The man with the mustache, now identified as Goose let out a wow as he was left in shock. The two quickly discussed what they were gonna do before turning to the little girl.

"Okay sweetie, you're gonna come with us so we can get your knee all better, we'll get you a lollipop and we'll go from there. Does that sound okay?"

The little girl, who now stopped crying, let out a little snifle before saying okay. She got up and took the mustache man's hand as the other one took her backpack and suitcase.

After the little girl got her knee cleaned and a bandage over it, the two men took her to their Commander's office with a lollipop in her hand. As she sat in a chair eating her lollipop the two men explained the situation to their Commander and gave him the letter, who after reading the letter, called for Tom 'Iceman' Kazansky.

When Iceman first got into the office he didn't notice the little girl sitting in a chair in the middle of the room. Only after being told by the 3 men what happened and reading the letter did he finally notice her.

To say that he was shocked that he had a daughter was an understatement but the moment he looked at her he decided that he was gonna be the best possible father.

He got down to her level as he gave her a warm smile.

"Hi sweetie. I'm your dad, Tom. You're safe now, I won't leave you."

The little girl looked at the man a little bit confused.

"I have a dadda?" Iceman let out a little chuckle as he did his best to hold back his tears.

"Yes you do sweetie. Do you have a name?"

Before answering him the little girl gave him a big hug (well as big as a 2 year old can give) which her dad gladly returned.

"Momma said I'm her little birdy."

All 4 men in the room were shocked, if she never got a name but only a nickname that probably means that she isn't even registered that she was born. At least the mom, whoever she is, wrote down the date and time of birth in the letter alongside some other information.

"Well then, how would you like to be called Victoria?" the little girl smiled big at her daddy, "I love it!"

That was the day she finally gotten a name. She got permission to stay on base since she had nowhere else to go. She was practically raised by the whole school, students and instructors included and the commander absolutely loved her and always gave her candy when he saw her.

One day the students were called for an unexpected class and training session. Tom was freaking out since he didn't know who he was gonna leave Victoria to, he had to go and the commander wasn't on base today. That's when he remembered that Goose's wife and kid were visiting so after getting his daughter and her backpack ready he went to find Bradshaw and ask him a big favour.

When Nick 'Goose' Bradshaw was asked by Kazansky if his wife could watch Victoria since he's got no one he can leave her to, the man didn't even have to think for a second and said yes. He loved the kid and wouldn't want any harm done to her plus he knew his wonderful wife Carole wouldn't mind since she knows the whole story.

That was the day that Victoria Kazansky and Bradley Bradshaw officaly met for the first time. Funny thing is even though there was about a 2 year difference they hit it off right away and became best friends instantly.

When it was time for Victoria to be picked up, Tom, Goose, Pete and Carole found her and Bradley asleep togehter on the couch, exhausted from playing all day. The four just melted at the sight with Carole snapping a few pics for the sake of memories.

It became sort of a tradition that everytime Carole and Bradley were visiting they'd pick up Victoria or would meet up with her and Tom so the two kids could play.

There were 3 weeks left until graduation and the 3 pilots alongside Carole, Charlie who Maverick got to come along with them and Sarah who was Iceman's new girlfriend were at the park and watched over the two kids as they played.

Victoria tripped and fell but before Iceman could even react, little Bradley was helping her up and telling her it was all gonna be okay.

"You just caught a bunny it's okay, I do it all the time!"

That made little Victoria giggle and she gave the boy a kiss on the cheek before the two countinued to play.

"Awwww that's just adorable!" Sarah was practically melting from the cuteness that she just witnessed, she didn't know Victoria for long but already loved the little girl like she was her own.

"Victoria is the only one that's allowed to hug Bradley or kiss him on the cheek, he usually dosen't let other kids do that. If they keep going like this, they're gonna end up married one day."

Carole had a smile on her face the entire time as the words left her mouth. She looked at the two kids again and laughed as they both tried going down the slide together but it was a little too narrow for both of them to fit.

"I think they'd be good for eachother when they get older. They both always know just the right thing to say, you don't find that everyday."

The other 2 pilots agreed with Maverick's words as they countinued to watch over the kids, the 3 women would comment from time to time about something Bradley and Victoria did.

If only they knew this was going to be the last time that they were all together like this.

A week later, the worst imaginable happened. Nick 'Goose' Bradshaw died while doing what he loves, flying.

At the funeral Bradley held Victoria's hand the entire time, the little girl was sad about Goose's death too since he was always really nice to her. She didn't know exactly what death was but she understood that Bradley's dad wasn't with them anymore.

You would think that Bradley would shut off after that and that his friendship with Victoria would cease to exist but no. He still wanted to see and play with her all the time.

When they were 13 and 15 the two went out for ice cream and sat down at a near by bench. They were laughing about something when Bradley caught a boy no more than 4 years old playing catch with his dad. It reminded him of him and his dad so much, gosh so many years passed already and he still missed him.

Victoria took his hand in her own. He turned towards the girl next to him.

"It's okay to miss him and it's okay to cry too if you need to. Remember he's always watching over you and is the proudest father ever." a small smile made it's way onto his face, "Thanks Vic, you always know the right thing to say."

The two shared a hug and at moment Bradley Bradshaw thanked God and the Universe for bringing Victoria Kazansky into his life. He truly dosen't know what he would do without her.

tag list

@in-themountains @srry-itshockeyszn @fangirlinc @jonginvlog @evans-dejong @lovemesomevesey

[tooruluv]

Katsuki Bakugou x F!Reader ( part 1 )

❝ ...and then there’s you. ❞

description: you and bakugou have hated each other since childhood. through the constant bickering, fighting, and actual fist fights... you had no idea that you had been writing to him.

genre: angst, soulmate au where you have a notebook that you can write to your soulmate in

word count: 3.8k

warnings/notes: strong language, lots of angst, aged up characters, bakugou being bakugou, reader has an air manipulation quirk created as part 1 of 3 for my winner of my tooruluv2kparty contest @katsulovee​ <33

teaser | part 2

| masterlist

“ ‘cause when the sun goes down, someone’s talking back ” - talking to the moon, bruno mars

┏━━━━━⋇⋆⋆⋇❦⋇⋆⋆⋇━━━━━┓

The storm only escalated, casting the sky in deep blues and greys. Loud rain clattered against the roof of your apartment building, the ceiling of your top floor apartment being the only thing that separated you from the pour. 

The rain may be cold, but you were on fire.

You had been livid all day, positively outraged by the man who seemed to always be in your way. He was the most arrogant, most opinionated, and most… loud-mouthed person you ever met. You were screaming from the inside out, burning with rage.

Groaning, you sprawled out on your bed.

Katsuki Bakugou was the biggest fucking issue on the planet. His absurd need to be the best at everything he did, his cold demeanor and venom that spews from his mouth -- you wanted nothing more than to punch him directly in the throat. 

With a deep breath, you flipped open your Soulmate Journal. 

The world was such a strange place, full of quirks and criminals and heroes and villains. To add on top of that, when you turn thirteen a journal just… appears. And whoever is your soulmate can read everything you write. Once they read it, they can reply or talk to you that way and the ink disappears. There are plenty of rules that go along with it, like if you turn thirteen before your soulmate does, the ink is red until they receive their own journal. Or how the journal itself is indestructible. Or the biggest rule: you cannot write any given name. 

When you’re thirteen, your life is full of hope and wishful thinking. Almost everyone at that age is excited to start writing to their Person, the one who they were supposed to be created to be with. You were surprised when you opened yours to find nothing written.

You assumed that you were a bit older than your soulmate, but that was quickly shut down as you wrote in black ink. Your soulmate hadn’t written anything. 

It took two months for him to write back. Two months of your excessive writing and nearly diary-like entries. Two months of you wondering if they would ever write back. Until he did.

Today sucked.

That was all you wrote, your past two months of writing still ever present and glaring at you with smudges and hinted annoyance. The ink started to fade like Harry talking to Tom Riddle, reappearing with new handwriting.

It was scrawled across the page with terrible handwriting, very much one of a middle school boy. 

Life sucks. Deal with it.

You were now twenty two, an adult and that once hope and love has turned into pessimism and indifference. And life still sucked. 

You were pretty famous, your air manipulation quirk one that catches a lot of attention. That, alongside your rivalry with the second most famous hero Bakugou, brought an abundance of recognition. Bakugou completely steals your thunder every chance he has, stealing your light and victories. 

You hated him. With the utmost disrespect, you hated him. Since your days in the hero academy, the two of you were at each other’s throats. He would even stop in the middle of antagonizing Deku to make some horrendous comment towards you instead. 

You ended up scribbling along the Soulmate Pages, heated rage boiling with each word.

Hey Honey! I need to vent if that’s okay.

Of course.

You would not believe the shit I have to endure in real life. I wish I could describe the hatred I have for this man I work with, he’s a real piece of shit. Anyway, how was your day?

My day was about the same as yours, living with the idiots of real life. If we could write names I would because there’s this bitch I work with that I fucking hate.

Maybe we need new jobs (insert laughing face even though I’m livid right now)

Yeah. Maybe. But we’ll get through it.

It took years for your soulmate to warm up to you. The first interactions were hesitant, slow, and barely considered conversations. But now you can discuss your day as if you were texting a friend, talk about your likes and dislikes. 

He was your soulmate after all.

You learned that he was a boy and an only kid, he had a strong quirk, and that he liked ramen. He was a rule follower and his handwriting always used proper punctuation. You told him all about your life and how you wanted to travel away from everything.

You wanted to know who he was, more than anything. 

You wished you could tell him your name and quirk, where you lived and who you were. You wished he could do the same. 

You’ve tried, of course, to write out your name and location. But the second the words were written onto the page, they turned into a random assortment of letters. Gibberish. Never to be written, never to be known.

“Dude, fucking relax!” You rubbed your temple at your desk, voice spitting venom against Bakugou’s loud vocals. “Not everything is about you, just sit down and wait to be sent on a mission.”

“What did you say to me?”

Katsuki Bakugou had been going on and on about how Deku got assigned to a mission in upper Japan, sent to work with a separate force for a bit to expand his horizon. He was outraged, yelling and standing tall and broad to pretend to be bigger than he was. 

You were doing paperwork, trying to concentrate despite his yelling and complaining and bitching. You were hovering above your seat with your legs crossed, papers scattered (it was a habit of yours, to just kind of hover a couple of inches off the surface of things; air manipulation and all that). 

“I said,” You turned to look into his ablaze eyes. “Sit down and wait. Not everything is about you.”

You only threw fuel into his fire, you could hear the sparking between his fingers. You turned back to your paperwork. 

“You don’t get to tell me what to do, you’re not even in the top five heroes.” Bakugou barked in your direction. You could feel his heat as he approached your desk. “You can sit and do your own paperwork all you want! I need to be put on serious cases, just like stupid Deku is always placed on.”

“You can argue with me all you want.” You moved to continue your work, pretending to be unbothered. You could feel the anger boil in your chest. “But you still are and will always be measly little number two. Now shut the fuck up, you’re interrupting those who are actually working.”

He was going to hit you, you knew he was. You two ended up fist fighting all the time, oxygen and explosions ending in destruction. Before he could, your boss walked in with a bellowing, “Bakugou! Get over here, I have something for your loud ass!”

You decided to give him a bored middle finger as he walked away.

They say that words are the way of life. You could say an infinite amount of words and sentences in your lifespan, you could say a word and only ever say it one time. Each assortment of words are different each time, something new every day. 

You figured that’s why you hated the soulmate thing. 

Finding your soulmate should be one of chance, of pure coincidence and meeting of strangers. With the journal, you are starting something you only hope to find. You could go your whole life without finding your soulmate.

And that is terrifying.

There are horror stories of writing to an endless notebook, sad movies created where the lettering turns back to red before they’ve found each other. You wanted nothing more than to meet and just… be with the man you’ve been writing to since you were thirteen.

It seemed to be some sick joke, a tease in the palm of your hands.

When you were young, you attended UA High. It was meant to be the best school for heroes, grooming them into the best of the best. Both of your parents had been heroes themselves, your mom with a cloud quirk and your dad with wings. You took after a bit of both, no wings and no clouds but could create air currents and manipulate the air surrounding you within a certain radius. It has something to do with your breath and lungs, but you never looked too much into the actual DNA aspect. 

When you arrived in the hero program, you passed the tests with ease. You tried to focus mainly on yourself and gaining your own points, alongside a couple of students with the same idea. 

You were pissed when you were placed in 1-B instead of 1-A. It was the start of your rivalry with the explosion boy. 

Luckily, you quickly gained friends. You actually seemed to have a soft spot for Hitoshi Shinsou, and you and Itsuka Kendou seemed to be the only two with brains (this led to many conversations resulting in shit talking and giggling). So in the end, you weren’t too upset to be placed in the second best class. 

And you did get to fight with Bakugou a lot more without punishment, your professor wanting to be number one as much as anyone else. 

One particular day that you remember to this day, one that really labeled your hatred for Bakuogu, was just a normal day at first. You were finished with your normal morning classes and just beginning the hero portion of the day, the training and fighting. 

Your class was working with Class 1-A for the day, teaming up with one of their students and seeing how your quirks would act both against and with each other.

You were, of course, teamed with Bakugou.

The fucker was already set in his ways, loud and in need of attention at all times. You were well aware of his… loud personality… at that point, being beside Shinsou when he called your class “extras”. He was already someone you wanted nothing to do with. 

“Good luck.” Kendou muttered to you when your names were announced as partners. “See ya.”

The second you headed to him, you could feel his apprehension. He wanted nothing to do with you. And you wanted nothing to do with him. In fact, you were hoping for Uraraka as your partner, wanting to see how your air manipulation would work with her gravity. 

Apparently the professors wanted to see the oxygen working with the burst of flames. Which, honestly, is cool yes — but it was the person behind the explosions that you did not want to be a part of.

Bakugou was not one to mumble under his breath. 

“Why am I paired with you?” He rolled his eyes, crossing his arms across his chest. “I could at least be with someone interesting like Mind Control over there.”

You already wanted to punch him. “You’ve obviously never seen my quirk.”

“Clearly it hasn’t been interesting enough to be worth my attention.”

“Say that again when I remove the oxygen straight from your lungs.” You threatened, knowing damn well you didn’t know how to do that yet. “Let’s just get this over with.”

He let out a long exhale, moving into position. You were already flying by the time he let off his first explosion.

His utter disrespect for you and your quirk not only irritated you, but only was the start of a long term competition on Who Can Be Better Than Who that lasted the rest of your time at UA.

Through the constant loud arguments, the yelling in the cafeteria and the comments just loud enough for the other to hear, the fist fights and the swearing that was reserved only for each other, you found comfort in talking to your soulmate. It was relaxing after a long day of pure annoyance and shit talking to finally just get to have normal conversations with someone you enjoy. 

Are we allowed to ask about school in this thing?

I don’t think so.

I’m sighing. Pretend that you could hear my sigh.

Wow, that was a loud sigh.

YOU’RE FUNNY! Anyway, I really want to know if we go to school together :(((

I don’t even think we can talk about JRTPD or BO::SOMD. See, they turn into gibberish.

 I mean… we can say school. So we can ask ABOUT school just not… specific schools. 

That’s true. I go to a special school and am the best in my class. You’re getting lucky by having me as a soulmate.

Well I would only hope so. Need a smart soulmate for fun facts.

Fun fact: you’re pretty cool. I guess.

Ah, the admission of your love for me.

Not love. I don’t hate talking to you if that does anything for you.

The one person you don’t hate. I’ll take it, Soulmate.

Don’t push it.

We should give each other nicknames. Since we can’t call each other by our real names.

Does the book allow it?

My parents did it before they found each other.

Okay. Like what?

I can call you Hot Head, because you’re hot and because you are always writing about how mad you are.

No.

I can always go with something cute like Honey.

This is gross. I was thinking like gamer tag nicknames.

Okay, Honey.

I take back what I said, asshole.

Honey and Asshole. The perfect pair. We could solve crimes!

I’m going to bed now.

Goodnight Honey ♡ I know that you aren’t reading these but you will in the morning. Dork.

“Do you know who your soulmate is?” You asked.

You were hanging out with Kendou, Monoma, and Shinsou in Kendou’s bedroom. The dorm rooms were all set up the exact same way, but for some reason Kendou’s always seemed to be bigger. 

“No idea.” Monoma shrugged. “I don’t think I want to know until I’m older, we’re too young and I want to focus on graduating first.”

“He’s right.” Kendou twisted in her position on her bed. “Why? Do you want to know who yours is?”

“I want to know more than anything.” You sighed. Your head was laid across Shinsou’s lap on the floor. “We get along so well and I try to talk to him every day.”

“How do you know it’s a he?”

“He told me.” You laughed. “We tried really hard to narrow it down as much as possible.”

“It sounds like he wants to know you too.” Kendou said. She giggled. “I should ask my soulmate their gender.”

“What about you, Shinsou?”

“I barely write to mine.” He shrugged, making your head tilt a little. “I’m sure they understand.”

“I’m sure they do, they were made to be yours.” You looked up at him with a smile. “Of everyone, I thought you would write the most.”

“And why’s that?”

“Because most people are scared to talk to you in real life.”

He flicked your forehead. “You aren’t scared to talk to me.”

“I’m not scared to talk to anyone.”

“I’ve noticed.”

You sighed and closed your Soulmate Journal, the rain now casting a dark shadow across the entirety of the sky. Your face was flushed in red, hair disheveled and you were still in your hero uniform, dirty and kind of burnt. 

Katsuki Bakugou had not only interrupted your victory, but he had claimed it as his own. His desperation to be the number one hero hadn’t stopped. It’s been years, you’ve grown past his stupid desire and he simply… hasn’t.

You fought the villain yourself, using your quirk to it’s full capabilities and trapping them in a circle of air. You fought for over an hour by yourself, taking up the mission while out and witnessing it first hand. Your freshly bought coffee was long forgotten as you raced after the thief.

The second you landed the thief, the ball of air dissipating as you grew tired, Bakugou arrived in a fiery feat and handcuffed the villain. Of course, the main photos were of him with the handcuffs, standing proud as if he hadn’t stolen your fight. 

His argument was that he did help. Yeah, he did ‒ for three seconds.

Katsuki Bakugou was a piss stain upon himself, truly the worst of the worst who’s own personal interest outweighs anything else in his life. He will never be anything but second best because he never thinks of anyone but himself. 

If only he could read thoughts instead of turning his sweat to ignition. Then you wouldn’t have to put your harsh thoughts into tone.

Your Soulmate was one of two people you genuinely enjoyed talking to, he always seemed to be on the same page as you. The other is Shinsou, from your high school. He was the only one you really kept in contact with.

Sometimes you like to convince yourself that Shinsou is your soulmate, since he hasn’t found his either. But you compared the handwriting and it didn’t match at all. Shinsou’s handwriting was much smaller and neater than the man you would eventually call yours.

“This is so fucking stupid!” You screamed, your rage reaching its max.

You threw your journal across your bedroom, the storm masking the sound of it banging against the wall by your bed. You were pissed, you wanted nothing more than to see Bakugou’s downfall. It’s been years. You were over it.

You were over it all. You were over him, you were over not knowing your soulmate, you were over being alone in your stupid apartment. It all reached it’s apex. Maybe you needed a shower, or maybe you needed to move from your job.

Your fit was interrupted by a loud crash on the roof of your apartment building. You nearly jumped at the sound, the sound not even close to the crashes of thunder. 

You rushed to the roof, your hero senses kicking in more than your regular carefulness. Once you were outside, you were almost instantly drenched in the rain. Only a couple of yards ahead of you was a man crumbled to the ground; they must’ve hit the roof harder than you thought.

When they turned, clutching their side, you knew instantly who it was.

“Deku?” You rushed towards him. “I thought you were in Hirosaki for some serious villain.”

He moved to stand, much taller and broad than he was back in high school. Yet still with the fluffy green hair and bright eyes with hope always seemingly sewed in. 

“I was. I just… I need your help.”

“Why do you need my help?” You helped him stand fully, taking his hand from his side to check for an injury. He wasn’t bleeding. “Doesn’t Uraraka live around here?”

“I don’t… want to involve her in this.” He stood straight. His healing must’ve started. “I… this is something I need you for.”

“Okay…” You crossed your arms. “What do you need?”

“I know what you’re going to say.” Deku started, and you didn’t move. “But it’s Bakugou.”

“No.”

“C’mon, Aero, I know that you two…”

“No.”

“Please, I…”

“Deku, you know more than anyone how and who he is. Whatever it is, he can deal with it himself.” You started back towards the stairs. “I appreciate you coming to me, for whatever reason, but this is something that you have to find someone else for.”

“Don’t think of this as us doing something for him.” Deku rushed to stand in front of you. “Think of it as a favor for me. You owe me one.”

“Don’t do this now.” 

“I’m officially cashing in my favor.”

You sighed, “Fine. Can you at least tell me what we need to do for the asshole?”

“I’ll tell you on the way.” He nearly jumped in joy. “But you cannot tell anyone. Not Shinsou, not the police, and not our boss. This is under the radar.”

“Oh, shit.” You followed him as you flew next to him. “What are you getting me into?”

tag list: @katsulovee @paradisebabey @seaofemptygold @zhaixiaowen @daylghits @haikyuusimp91 @darknessyournewfriend @samwise-though @liaxxx109

[blackbutler-readerinsertsandjunk]

IF ITS NOT TOO MUCH TROUBLE Could i maybe 👉👈 request a soulmate au thing with joker? ik youve done stuff w him and affluent girls before but maybe like. idk. the one where you dont see color until you lock eyes set prior to him and his siblings being taken in by the baron? ofc if soulmate aus arent your thing then please disregard this !

OF COURSE LOVELY!!

sooo I wasn’t sure to take this as you wanted an affluent girl or you wanted someone a bit more middle class/poor in the same boat as him, but, I tried to make it sooooorta ambiguous??

but anyways I ADORE soulmate AUs so this is totally fine!! I think I’ve really only written a handful of things for various types of soulmate AUs before, and only like maybe one or two on this blog, but I really love them so I had fun!

I hope it’s good tho~

also I will genuinely cry over Lavender Blue, it’s my favorite lullaby <3

Your world has been passing you by in various shades of grey for too long, and you’re starting to think you’re doomed to never find the one you’re supposed to find.

It’s something everyone in the world knows, that you don’t see any kind of color at all until you look into your soulmate’s eyes for the first time. You’ve heard horror stories about people who die without ever seeing a single hue, and that terrifies you more than anything.

Even now you go about your life in a sea of black and white, desperately searching for any sign that you might be close. Every day looks the same, and every person is made of the same dull lack of color.

Some of your friends try in vain to describe it to you ― what it’s like to have the world painted in real colors. Without having seen it for yourself, you know you can’t possibly understand. What does red look like, you wonder? Blue? Green? Yellow? Are there subtleties you can’t even imagine?

Your thoughts wrap you up in anxiety as you make your way down the street. You’ve been so lost in them, you scarcely realize that you’ve made your way to a section of town you’ve never been to before… until you hear a velvety voice cutting through the rest of the surrounding noise.

“Tom, he was a piper’s son he learnt to play when he was young and all the tune that he could play was ‘over the hills and far away’ over the hills and a great way off the wind shall blow my top-knot off Tom with his pipe made such a noise that he pleased both the girls and boys they all stopped to hear him play ‘over the hills and far away’…”

It’s a kind of voice you’ve never heard before; not overly deep, but rich and charming. It draws your attention immediately, and you turn your head to find the source. Almost certainly it’s a street performer, so you’d like to give him something for his effort.

There he is, on a street corner that’s fairly close to where you are right now, among a small group. They all look so beat up, down on their luck, though the singer has a smile on his face.

Just as you step toward the group, the singer turns to look at you, catching your eyes with his, and suddenly your world changes in an instant. It’s like everything blossoms from the inside out, into more shades than you’ve ever seen. The sky is entirely different from the buildings, the carousel of people’s clothing is distinct against the cobblestone below their feet, and it’s an overload.

There’s so much new information for you to process, out of nowhere, and you find yourself staring at the singer more than anywhere else. That hair, long enough to spill over his shoulders, it’s a color you can only guess at the name of. It’s muted, and bright simply for the fact that it’s brand new.

God, you love it.

Everything else about him seems so much more stunning now too. The angles of his face stand out, the sharpness of his eyes contrasting with the kindness shining within them. It’s as if he was carved from stone just to be here in this moment with you.

As soon as the two of you lock eyes, his song catches in his throat, choked off. That makes it unmistakable; it’s not a coincidence and it’s not someone else. He’s seeing it too, the bursting to life of his vision, the vibrant colors that have bloomed into being.

That look! It’s as if you’re the first sunrise he’s ever seen.

… Well. Maybe, in a way, you are. And he’s yours.

He’s… breathtaking.

You get closer, and you happen to notice the strange way his thin coat is hanging off his frame. Once you’re right up close to him, it becomes clear why. He’s missing an arm, leaving that coat sleeve to simply dangle in the wind.

Without a word, he notices your gaze, and his face colors. Oh, God. That’s what all the books mean when they say someone is blushing…? A small step back.

Like he’s giving you a chance to bow out. A chance to run from fate. To pretend this never happened. To not choose him.

Instead, you slowly pull £2 from your pocket, offering it in his direction.

He looks at the money as if he’s terrified of it. Just like you, he’s never seen the hues of the banknotes before… though, you wonder if he’s ever seen a banknote close like this at all. His look of wonder suggests not.

He appears to recover quickly, however. He clears his throat before offering you a shaky smile. “Well! My apologies. I didn’t knoo ye had a request. What d’ye wanna hear, darlin’?”

Of course he won’t just accept it, even though you were going to give it anyway. He almost seems bashful at the idea of you, the one he’s meant to be with, handing him money in your first interaction.

You nod at him, encouraging him to follow your lead.

“Lavender blue, dilly dilly lavender green when you are king, dilly dilly I shall be queen.”

His eyes sparkle at you, playful but curious, with something underneath that hints he almost doesn’t believe this is happening. Still, when you gently drop the pound notes into the banged-up at near his feet, he reaches out his hand to you.

You take his hand, and you don’t think you could have dreamed of a better way to have met him.

“Who told you so, dilly dilly? Who told you so? ‘Twas my own heart, dilly dilly that told me so.”

[softholand]

pot valiant - t.h

pairing: bartender!tom x reader

summary: pot-valiant, definition; bold or courageous under the influence of alcoholic drink

warnings: drinking, swearing, smut, dom!tom

words: 4.3k

a/n: i did it!!! bartender!tom was always present in my mind and after that picture (thanks paddy!!) i couldn’t help myself ;))) i hope you guys like this and please let me know what you think <3 enjoy!!

Two weeks, three days, 5 hours, and 22 seconds. That was the time your best friend Briana gave you to mourn your last failed relationship. Once that time had passed, she broke into your house, made you take a much necessary shower, forcing you to shave and wash your hair, while she took care of the mess that was your house. Plastic food containers and cans of beer and Coca-Cola littered both the kitchen and the living room floor, making the house smell like a garbage can.

“Glad to see you’re still alive!” Briana cheered after you got out of the shower, wearing your fluffy robe. “I am but barely. Wow, what did you do to my house?” You asked, being met with a completely different scenario from the one you left.

“I just put out the trash, y/n! Something you should have done before.” Briana scolded you, making you roll your eyes. “Should have waited and put me out too, since I feel like trash!” You groaned, flopping down on your sofa.

“Hey, no, no, no! Get up, y/n! We’re going out!” Your best friend announced, before trying to make you stand. “Noooo, please, Bri! I’ll do anything you want, but that!” You pleaded, but it was of no use. “I don’t wanna hear it, y/n! I didn’t come here to clean your house, I came to take you out of here and that’s what I’m gonna do.” Briana stated, taking your hands.

“Bri, I love you, but please let me stay just a little longer, I’m not ready for the outside world yet.” You groaned, trying your best to convince your best friend. “y/n, I love you too, that’s why I’m here! I can’t stand seeing you like this anymore! Yeah, what Tyler did to you was fucked up, but that doesn’t mean you have to stop living your life because of it.” Briana exclaimed.

“I know, Bri! I know! It’s just… hard for me to wrap my head around the fact he ditched me after all this time and that I’m single now.” You sighed, starting to feel emotional. At that, Briana pulled you closer and wrapped her arms around you, engulfing you in one of her best hugs. “I’m sorry, y/n! I didn’t mean to make you cry again.” Bri apologized, making you chuckle through your tears. “It’s okay, Bri! It’s not your fault, really. I’m just… a mess!” You laughed, drying your face with the robe sleeves.

“One drink. We get one drink and if you still don’t wanna stay after that, we leave. I promise!” Your friend offered, with hopeful eyes. “Fine! One drink!” You sighed, to which she squealed. “Yes! Thank you, y/n! You’re not gonna regret it! I’ve found this new club, it opened just a couple of weeks ago. You’re gonna love it!” She grinned. “Now, go put on your best outfit, we’re going out!” Briana squealed, making you laugh at her excitement.

About an hour later and after a whole lot of makeup and trying on clothes, Briana finally decided you were done with what she called: a Cinderella transformation. Of course, you laughed at her choice of words, and to irritate your friend, even more, you asked if you also should be back at midnight. She gave you the middle finger, before giving up and joining you in laughter.

After a quick cab ride, that could be done by feet, not with the heels you two were wearing though, you and Briana were at the new club she talked about. Once inside, you had to admit your best friend was right. The place looked like a mix of everything you enjoyed, the walls were coated in a beautiful shade of red, while the lounge area was filled with dark green sofas. Different from the other places you had been to, the bar on this one was positioned right in the middle, with bar stools in that same dark green velvet texture, rounding the space. The dim light that filled the space gave a mysterious/sensual vibe, something you were also a fan of.

Briana immediately dragged you to the bar, waiting patiently for one of the many bartenders. While she made her request, you took the time to scan the place, noting some artsy bits that complemented the space. “What can I get you?” A smooth masculine voice took you out of your daze, making you avert your attention to him. Right in front of you, a gorgeous boy with hazel eyes and chocolatey brown curls grinned at you, waiting for your answer. What was even the question?

“I’m sorry, I didn’t hear you.” You apologized, making his smile grow even more. “I asked what can I get you tonight, darling?” He asked, making you smile with the nickname. “Oh, uh… a daiquiri, please!” You finally said, not being able to avert his gaze. “Good choice! I’ll be right back, girls!” He smirked, before going to the enormous wall of beverages behind him.

Once he was out of earshot, Briana lightly kicked your bare leg, getting your attention. “Isn’t he hot?” She mouthed, making you roll your eyes. “Really, Bri? Already?” Shaking your head, you went back to looking at your surroundings. “Oh, c’mon y/n! A woman has to eat!” Briana joked, making you both burst out laughing.

Seconds later, hot guy was back, this time with two cocktail shakers in his hands. Like every bartender in the world, he made his presentation while pouring the ingredients into the containers, making sure to really flex his arms while shaking it. Not that you noticed.

With two glasses in front of you, he poured the drinks in, doing the finishing touches before serving them to you. “Two pretty drinks for two pretty ladies, enjoy!” He smirked, before going back to his business. “Oh God, he only gets better!” Briana jokingly fanned herself, making you laugh. “He’s just doing his job, Bri! How many times do you think he used that one?” You asked your friend, who rolled her eyes at you. “You’re no fun!” She groaned, putting her tongue out.

Briana was only halfway through her Cosmopolitan when one of her favorite songs started to play. She made everything in her power to make you go with her but you denied her offer, stating you were fine watching her from the bar. With her drink in her hands, she made her way into the dance floor, purposely shaking her booty at you, which made you laugh and almost choke on your barely touched drink.

“Not into dancing?” The same voice from minutes ago asked, startling you. “Oh, no! Not today, at least!” You shrugged, offering him a smile. “So, what brought you and your friend here? I’m Tom, by the way!” He asked, cleaning the surface in front of him, making the watch he wore catch the fluorescent lights of the club. “y/n! And to be honest, she dragged me here.” You told him, giving into their usual small talks. “Wanna talk about it? I’m a pretty damn good listener!” He offered you with a smile.

You took a deep breath, asking yourself if it was really a good idea to share a part of your life with a stranger, and since you weren’t going to step foot on the dance floor, you thought this was the next most reasonable thing to do. Right? “Well, I was into a two-year relationship that ended a couple of weeks ago, and apparently staying inside your house, eating takeout food, and crying over stupid romantic movies is not a very healthy thing to do, so today she went to my house and here I am.” You smiled, taking a sip of your drink.

Once you looked at Tom, he gave you a pitiful look, to which you shrugged. “That’s not even the worst part though.” You said, the alcohol in your system already making the choices for you. “Instead of calling me or sending me a text asking to talk, you know, like a normal person, he invited me to his parents’ tenth-anniversary party and broke up with me in front of his whole family, claiming I wasn’t what he wanted in a relationship anymore.” With a raise of your glass, you finished your sad story, downing the rest of your daiquiri.

“Damn, what a dick!” Tom breathed after a couple of seconds, making you chuckle. “Oh, well! Cheers to single life, I guess…” You said, raising your now empty glass. “Need a refill?” He asked, pointing to the glass on your hands. “Please!” You huffed, before thanking him. “What will it be now?” Tom smirked, seeing your thinky face. “I don’t know, something strong.” He nodded, giving you two thumbs-ups, before going back to the wall to collect the ingredients.

Once the song ended, Briana came back to you and you two chatted until Tom came back with your drink, waiting for your approval. “It’s good! I like it! Thanks, Tom!” You smiled, locking eyes with him. “Do you want a refill too, darling?” He asked Briana, to which she said a beer would be fine. Once he was off, you felt your best friend's eyes burning a hole in your skull. “What?” You asked, impatiently. “We’re already on a name basis then?” Briana smirked, making you roll your eyes at her. “Yeah, I mean, he introduced himself, what did you want me to do?” You snapped and that was enough to her smirk double in size. “Okay, girl! You sure you don’t want to go home then?” She asked you for what felt like the fifth time. “Yes, Bri! I’m good! I promise!” You assured your best friend before she once again was off to the dance floor.

You quietly took sips of your new strawberry drink, watching from afar as your friend seemed to get her eyes on a specific guy for the night. She gave you a wink, making you roll your eyes at her antics. “She seems to be enjoying herself.” You heard Tom’s voice, turning the barstool to find him looking at you. “Yeah, she always does!” You agreed, taking another sip of your drink. “So, you’re from here?” He asked, sounding interested. “Yeah, I’m a local! You?” You said, raising your brows. “Same!” He smiled, going right to the next question.

The conversation kept going for most of the night, Tom attended some clients, while you took sips of your drinks, and once he was free, he was right back at you with another round of questions. Seeing as Briana wasn’t by your side anymore, you welcomed his company, glad at least this way you wouldn’t be left alone. “Museologist? I’ve never heard that before!” He grinned, making you chuckle. “Yeah, it’s not very common. Basically what I do is investigate and preserve material cultural stuff, like paintings, sculptures or constructions and immaterial, such as traditions and folklore.” You answered and Tom couldn’t help but find adorable the way your eyes lit up while you talked.

Briana came back after a couple more songs, sitting by your side and asking Tom another beer. “So, found your prey?” You joked, making her laugh. “Actually, I did! See that blonde? With the samurai bun?” She pointed and you nodded once your eyes landed on him. “Nice, Bri!” You complemented, giving her a playful high five. “Right? And he’s so sweet and smart and funny! He even asked me if I wanted to go to his house.” She blurted, seemingly disappointed. “And?” You asked, not getting why she reacted that way. “Oh, no! I’m not leaving you. I dragged you here so I’m taking you home.” Briana exclaimed, to which you rolled your eyes. “Bri, I’m totally able to call a cab and go home by myself. I’m fine, I promise! You can go with Mr. Samurai bun if you want.” You assured her, seeing her eyes widen. “No, y/n/n! I promised you!” She protested, making you groan. “I’m fine, Bri! Go with him!” Once again, you insisted. “Are you sure?” She asked and you had to laugh at her. “I’m not a child, Bri! Now go, he’s not going to wait all night!” You teased, getting a hug and a kiss on the cheek from your friend before she was off.

“Lost your friend?” Tom asked once he was back from his bartender duties. “Yeah, it's just me now and I think I’ll actually call it a night and go home.” You told him, making him frown. “Hey, not to sound creepy or anything but are you going by yourself? Because that’s not very safe and my shift ends in like ten minutes. If you want, I can accompany you.” With hopeful eyes, the boy in front of you smiled, making your heart flutter just a tiny bit. You thought about leaving a stranger accompanied you home, you really did, but something in your gut told you it was fine, Tom was a good guy and would never do anything to harm you. So, you went with it. “Yeah, that would be great, actually.” You smiled and ten minutes later, you were both leaving the club, at 3:30 in the morning.

Tom offered to call a cab but seeing as your house was only a few minutes away, you asked if it was okay for him that you guys walked. He agreed and with the moon illuminating your steps, the pair of you made your way into the almost silent streets. You guys kept talking and occasionally your hands would brush on one another, which caused little butterflies to erupt in your stomach. Once in front of your apartment building, you stopped, having no idea what to do next, since you were in a relationship for the last two years.

“It was nice meeting and talking to you, Tom!” You said, opting for the easiest way out. “Yeah, the feeling is mutual, y/n!” He answered, stuffing both of his hands in his pockets. “Thank you for… listening.” You mumbled, making him chuckle. “Of course! Whenever you need!” He smiled, not moving a muscle. “I’ll see you around, then. Bye!” With a little wave of your hand, you made your way to the door, while Tom watched you from his place. “Sure! Bye, y/n!” He exclaimed, making you smile, finally entering the building.

That’s how you found yourself going back to that same club every Friday, getting a couple of drinks while talking to Tom, then being escorted home by him. You had been doing this for almost a month now and Briana was starting to get suspicious. It was Friday again and she had just called you while you finished getting ready. “So, any plans for tonight?” She asked, already predicting your answer. “Not really, just gonna get some drinks and head home.” You said while clasping your black sandals. “Tom’s gonna bring you home again?” You sighed, already knowing where this conversation was heading. “I don’t know, Bri! If he wants to.” You looked in the mirror for the last time, before taking your bag and heading out. Once Briana finally hung up, you threw your phone into your purse, getting into the cab.

The routine was the same, you got in, spotted Tom, sat in one of the many barstools, and waited for him to approach you. “What can I get this beautiful lady today?” He joked, a smile wide on his face. Today he was wearing a simple black shirt, tight around his muscles, the watch still sat proudly on his wrist, and his curls were a little bit messier than most days. “You know you don’t have to waste your pickup lines with me, Tom.” You smiled, watching his reaction. “Okay then, what can I get this grumpy old lady today?” He smirked, making you chuckle. “A Sex On The Beach, please?!” You grinned and after a quick wink, he was off.

The rest of the night passed like magic, you didn’t even see the time pass and once you took a look at your phone, you saw that it was almost time for Tom’s shift to end, which meant it was time to head home. The chilly London air hit as soon as you stepped out of the club, making you shiver, seeing as you were only in a dress. Like the gentleman he was, Tom took off his jacket and placed it on your shoulders, and although you protested, saying he was going to catch a cold, he assured you he was fine with his shirt.

You didn’t know what you were thinking when the words “Do you wanna come inside?” came out of your mouth but now was definitely too late to take them back. “Oh, yeah! Sure!” Tom agreed, making you smile. The short lift ride was awkward and once you walked into your apartment, the feeling only grew. Tom stayed pretty close to the door, with both of his hands in his pockets, while you put your purse away and turned on the lights. “Welcome and sorry for the mess.” You said, going back to the living room. Tom just smiled, before saying, “You call this messy? You should see my house!” You both laughed and the tension was back in the air. “Do you want anything? Water, wine, beer?” You offered, taking off your shoes and his jacket, putting the both away. “Water would be good.” He said and you quickly made your way to the kitchen, shaking your head to try and get rid of some very intrusive thoughts.

“Thanks!” He smiled, taking the glass from your hands, while your eyes kept focused on his arm and the prominent veins and the way his shirt was almost being ripped by his bicep. “y/n? You here?” Tom’s voice brought you back, making your face grow hot with the knowledge you got caught. “Yes, sorry!” You apologized, watching as his smirk grew in size. He placed the cup on the small table by your door, before taking a couple of steps closer. Slowly, as if testing the waters, he put his hands on your hips, leaning the smallest bit in, not taking that stupid smirk off of his face.

His smell was intoxicating, the mixture of alcohol and mint was definitely making your mind clouded. “Tom…” You whispered once he was only centimeters away from you. “What is it, y/n?” He asked, looking between your eyes and your lips. “Kiss me!” You almost pleaded, his smirk the last thing you saw before his lips were crashing into yours. The feeling was new, you hadn’t kissed anyone since your ex-boyfriend and you couldn’t help but compare them. Tom’s was so much better though, his lips could be thin but they held so much power on them, his mouth worked like magic against yours, and before you knew he was pulling away, completely breathless. The pause didn’t last long though, he looked so good with his lips plumped, the tiniest of the smirks still proudly on them, you just couldn’t help yourself and launched yourself at him.

You backed him against the wall, moaning when you felt his tongue entering your mouth. Tom placed both of his hands on your ass, squeezing it before asking, “Bedroom?” Without breaking the kiss, you pointed in the direction of your room and before you knew it, he was carrying you in his arms. You squealed, wrapping your legs around his torso, before going back to his lips. He placed you on the bed, making a trail of kisses from your neck, all the way to your stomach. Once he positioned himself between your tights, he looked at you with his bright brown eyes, asking if he could take your dress off. You nodded and after a little bit of a struggle, he took the thin material out of your body, leaving you in just a pair of white underwear. “You’re so beautiful!” He whispered, going back to your lips and attacking them with kisses. “Tom, please…” You moaned, growing even more eager to feel him. “What do you want, darling?” He smirked, loving seeing you like that. “You, I want you!” With a shake on your voice, you pleaded and he finally took the clue and went to work.

After another confirmation from you, he discarded your panties, tracing his fingers through your now soaked folds. “You look amazing, y/n!” Tom breathed before going straight to your core. You let out a moan as soon as his lips touched you, making your whole body shake with pleasure. “And tastes amazing too!” He purred, focusing on his task. Your moans only grew louder when he pushed two of his slender fingers on your heat. “Fuck, Tom! Feels so good!” You blurted, not being able to control yourself. “That’s it, baby! I can feel your walls clenching around my fingers. Tell me how much do you wanna cum.” Tom whispered, making you clench even more, only by his words. “Wanna cum, Tom! Please…” You were never this talkative in bed and not once has a guy been this dominant with you but you couldn’t say you weren’t enjoying it. “Cum for me, baby! Wanna hear you scream my name!” He mumbled and finally lost control. Your whole body shook with pleasure and you had to contain yourself from closing your thighs around Tom’s head.

Once you came back from your high, you opened your eyes to find Tom already looking at you, with some of your wetness still glistening on his chin. “You alright?” He asked, concern coating his words. “Yeah!” You smiled, before going back to his lips. With a quick move, you straddled him, helping him take off his shirt, letting his chest perfectly exposed for you. You lowered yourself, leaving a trail of kisses on his jaw, neck, collarbones, chest, each one of his abs, and finally, his perfectly sculpted v line. “Are you sure? You don’t have to, I’ll be perfectly fine by just giving...” You interrupted his mumbling by attaching your lips to his, hoping it would be his answer.

With the rest of his clothes discarded, you couldn’t help but admire his body. He was perfect. Sculpted by the gods, even. After wetting your hands, you took his cock, pumping a few times before attaching your lips to it. You twirled your tongue, tasting his precum, feeling him grow harder and harder on your hands. “Holy shit, you feel so good, y/n!” His words of encouragement were enough for you to start moving your head up and down, taking his member into your mouth inch by inch, until he was bucking his hips. “Fuck! You’re bloody amazing, darling!” He praised, while making direct eye contact with you, “But if you want more, you better stop before I coat your throat with my cum.” You had to admit, his dirty talk was doing something to you.

Releasing his cock with a loud pop, you climbed on top of him, kissing his lips. “Do you have a condom?” He asked between kisses. “Bedside table, first draw.” You answered and after a loud smack on your ass, you got off of him, both of you wearing playful smiles on your faces. Tom opened the foil package and rolled the material into his member, positioning himself at your entrance. “You sure you wanna do this?” He asked, making sure you wanted this as much as he did. “Yes, Tom! I want you to fuck me!” You said, kissing his lips.

With both of his hands on your hips and a huge smirk on his face, he pushed himself into you, making you moan. It took you a few seconds to get used to him and once you nodded, Tom started to move, bringing another level of pleasure to your body. “Fuck! You’re so tight around me, y/n!” He whispered, biting your earlobe. “Tom, fuck me harder!” You pleaded, wanting nothing more than to be railed by him. That seemed to take Tom by surprise but he was quick to obey your wish, thrusting harder and harder into your soaking wet core. “You look so beautiful like that, all sweaty, begging me for more!” He kept praising you, feeling how much you liked when he did.

With both of his arms by your head, he caged you, tattooing your face with kisses. “Feel so good, Tom! Please, make me cum!” You mumbled, by now barely able to form sentences. Tom was quick to obey and once his fingers found your clit, rubbing small circles in it, you were gone. Toes curling, you arched your back, getting a handful of the mattress in one hand while the other scratched Tom’s back. “Fuck, y/n!” With a final thrust of his hips, Tom reached his high, moaning your name like it was the most beautiful prayer.

He collapsed on top of you, leaving a long kiss on your lips, before getting up and tossing the condom on the trash. You went to the bathroom to clean yourself up, seeing as you were too tired to take a shower, and asked him if he wanted that too. He agreed and once you were decent enough, you put on clean panties and his discarded shirt, asking him to join you on the bed. Of course, he accepted, he wasn’t planning to go anywhere either so, after putting his boxers back on, he climbed on the bed with you.

You quickly doze off but right before you did, you admitted to yourself that, like most of the time, Briana was right, and going to that new club wasn’t a bad idea after all.

tagging: @stuckonspidey @bi-writes @duskholland @screamholland @missnxthingg @tomhollandthing @wazzupmrstark @peeterparkr @veryholland @spideyspeaches-deactivated20221 @lauras-collection @tommybaholland @rebekkah4766 @hopelessromm @pensivepeter @geminiparkers @mrs-hollandstan @hollandcreep @uglypastels

[fielran]

A (not so) Brief Guide to Titles and Prefixes on Downton Abbey

Married vs Unmarried Women

All downstairs characters should be either Miss or Mrs. The prefix Ms. did not come into common use until the late 1960s and so is anachronistic -- it is not a shortened version of Miss, but rather a marital-status neutral alternative to the other prefixes in use.

"Miss" denotes an unmarried character, regardless of age.

"Mrs" or "Misses" denotes a married or widowed character, or rarely, an upper female servant. Remember the exchange from S1--

Joe Burns: I notice you call yourself Misses.

Mrs Hughes: Housekeepers and cooks are always Misses. You know better than anyone I haven't changed my name.

Joe Burns: Well, I know you wouldn't change it to Burns when you had the chance.

Miss or Mrs are also used for any middle or upper class characters who do not have titles, including courtesy titles.

Use of Prefixes for Servants

The lower servants, including maids and footmen, are referred to by first name only, both by upstairs and downstairs characters.

Lady's maids, valets, and male upper servants are referred to by prefix and last name by downstairs characters, but by only last name by upstairs characters. For example, Mrs. Hughes says "Miss O'Brien" but Cora and Robert say only "O'Brien". Female upper servants get the prefix from everyone, even Lord Grantham:

Mrs Patmore: I promise you, milord, if I could just be allowed a bit more time--

Robert, Earl of Grantham: Mrs Patmore, I've not asked you here to give you your notice.

For example, Thomas Barrow starts as a footman, and everyone calls him Thomas. During the war, he is Corporal or Sergeant Barrow, then he is called Thomas again after, as a footman. When he becomes Robert's valet, he is Mr Barrow downstairs, or Barrow upstairs, and remains that way throughout his remaining promotions. He is also called Mr Barrow by the children. It may be this is a peculiarity, or the children may be expected to refer to unrelated adults using their title.

Anna is a bit of a strange case - she properly ought to be Mrs. Bates downstairs and Bates upstairs after she becomes a lady's maid, but perhaps to avoid confusion with her husband who is also Bates upstairs, the change never happens.

Phyllis Baxter is Baxter upstairs, Miss Baxter downstairs. If Mrs Hughes retires and Phyllis takes her place, she would be Mrs. Baxter. If she actually gets around to marrying Molesley at some point, with no promotion, she would be Mrs Molesley downstairs, Molesley upstairs.

Tom Branson as chauffeur is called Branson by both upstairs and downstairs characters - at least those who are not in a relationship with him. After his marriage to Lady Sybil, he is called Mr Branson by those outside the family.

Daisy is called by only her first name as a scullery and kitchen maid. There are no other undercooks to compare, so I am unsure whether she ought to be Mrs Mason. If Mrs Patmore retires and she becomes the cook, she should become Mrs Mason (or Mrs Parker, if she actually gets around to marrying Andy by then).

Titles for Nobility

There are 2 main types of titles used by the 'nobility': Substantive titles, and courtesy titles.

Substantive titles are for those who hold titles in their own right. This includes hereditary peers, like Lord Grantham, as well as life peers. The title holders have seats in the House of Lords.

Courtesy titles are for those connected to title holders - wives and widows, children, and other male-line heirs. Wives and widows hold legal, though not substantive, titles. Children of title holders are considered socially as nobility; however, legally speaking they are commoners and can be elected to the house of commons.

Lord Grantham is the only member of the Crawley family with a substantive title during the time of the series. All the others use courtesy titles. As the wife and widow of title holders, Cora and Violet are Lady [title], in this case Lady Grantham.

Legitimate daughters of a hereditary Marquess, Duke, or Earl or his direct male-line heirs are Lady [first name]: Lady Sybil, etc. They retain this styling if they marry someone without a title. In Pride and Prejudice, Darcy's aunt Lady Catherine, daughter of an Earl, had been married to Sir Lewis de Bourgh, who held only a knighthood and no title, so she remained Lady Catherine. Violet Crawley married Robert's father, the Earl of Grantham, and so her married title of Lady Grantham took precedence over any title she used previously, even if her father had higher precedence.

This courtesy title does not carry on to their children. Sybbie Branson cannot claim her mother's courtesy title, and her father Tom Branson has no title of his own, so she will be Miss, not Lady. Under formal etiquette, she and any future siblings would be styled like the Bennets - Miss Branson for an adult Sybil, as the eldest unmarried daughter, Miss [first name] for any additional unmarried daughters. However, they would not necessarily follow such protocol unless they are active socially in the upper class - if Mr Branson marries Lucy and she inherits, for example. The middle and lower class, especially more radical members thereof, did not hold closely to this tradition by the time Sybbie would be an adult.

The eldest son and heir of the hereditary holder of a title in the top 3 ranks - duke, marquess, or earl - can use one of the title holder's subsidiary titles as a courtesy title. We don't know if Grantham has a subsidiary title, because nobody alive during the show is entitled to use it. If there is one, Robert would have used it prior to his father's death; however, James was not Robert's son and therefore could not use the title, nor could Patrick or Matthew. George, although he is Robert's grandson and heir, cannot use the title because he is inheriting through Matthew rather than Robert.

The younger sons of Dukes and Marquesses are given the courtesy title Lord [first name]. The younger sons of Earls without subsidiary titles, as well as all sons of other nobles, are styled The Honourable [first name] [last name], as: "The Honourable Evelyn Napier, son and heir to Viscount Branksome." Tim Grey is also "The Honourable", although he will not inherit if Larry has any legitimate sons.

Adopted children were not entitled to a courtesy title at the time Downton Abbey takes place, so there will be no title for Marigold even if Bertie adopts her or Edith acknowledges her.

Young Children

Young children of higher standing than the speaker should be referred to as Master or Miss, regardless of actual titles. So in Downton's nursery we have Master George, Miss Sybbie, Miss Caroline, and Johnny.

So What Does That All Mean for Whoever I'm Writing About?

Robert would have been Master Robert as a child, Viscount Something - the wiki says Viscount Downton - as a young man, prior to his father's death, and of course is Lord Grantham in the time of the show. Had he had a son while his father was still living, that son may have used another subsidiary title, if one exists, or have been styled "The Honourable". Any brothers Robert had would also be styled "The Honourable".

Cora would have been Miss Levinson prior to her marriage, Viscountess Something after, then finally Duchess of Grantham. She may one day become the Dowager Duchess of Grantham.

Mary would remain Lady Mary after both marriages, as neither Matthew or Henry has a title. However, had Matthew lived to become Earl of Grantham, she would have become Countess of Grantham at that time. Carson may have called her Miss Mary as a child.

Sybil Crawley would remain Lady Sybil, though she would use Branson's last name.

Edith would change from Lady Edith to the Marchioness of Hexam on her marriage. Her illegitimate daughter Marigold would have no title, even if adopted by Lord Hexam. Her firstborn son would use a subsidiary title, and younger sons would be called Lord [first name]. The firstborn son of her firstborn son would also likely have a subsidiary title. Additional daughters would be Lady [first name].

Bertie went from an untitled Mr Pelham to the Marquess of Hexam. His mother did not gain a title and is called Mrs Pelham.

Sybbie Branson is Miss Sybbie now, and will be Miss Branson. She will not have a title unless she marries into one.

George Crawley is Master George now, and will be Mr Crawley until he inherits the title Earl of Grantham. He is not Viscount Downton.

Marigold is Miss Marigold, and will be Miss whatever-last-name-they-decide-to-use. I don't know what that is, and there isn't one listed on the wiki. Miss Pelham if Bertie adopts her.

Caroline is Miss Caroline, and will be Miss Talbot.

Evelyn Napier is The Horourable Evelyn Napier. He is addressed directly as Mr Napier. After his father's death, he will be Viscount Branksome.

Anthony Foyle is Viscount Gillingham. Prior to his father's death, he was an Honourable.

Larry and Amelia Grey are styled The Honorable Mr and Mrs Larry Grey. They will be Baron and Baroness Merton on his father's death.

Let me know if there are any other characters you aren’t sure of, and I’ll try to add them.

[uhyeahmaybenoidk]

Part 2&3 of ‘I’ve connected the two dots’ the Gilded Age edition

I don’t like the intro. Way too much is happening out there for my taste.

Butlers are the only sane people in this show.

One of these days ladies will gang up on Marian. She is walking on thin ice.

The tea party was pure comedy. Nobody is subtle and Agnes is one step from murder.

Marian: I wish I understood what brings you to New York. Me: Girl, are you blind?

I love the ‘we like riling Agnes up’ club.

Listen I have nothing against Marian but please spice her up a bit. I have like no interest in her as separate character apart from potential love triangle. So far she looks to be a Mary Sue dressed in historical clothes. Honestly, Julian, you can do better.

On the other hand, I’m really intrigued by Peggy. Her past is a total mystery. Frankly speaking I know nothing about America of that period so I cannot tie whatever happened to her to any real life events that would explain why she needs a lawyer. That is why my totally wild and uneducated guess is that she married someone in Pennsylvania against her father’s will and now she’s like ‘oh shit that was a mistake but I won’t admit it to him’. Yep that’s a cliché and dumb theory. I know.

Mrs. Chamberlain is another intriguing character. She is married or she was married. Oh I have a theory! She is a widow who married a very rich but old man who died soon and after his death she got herself a toy boy or whatever they called it in 19th century. That does sound scandalous enough to make Anges’ blood boil, doesn’t it?

I have a question about the dress worn by Carrie Astor in the last scene: what the heck? Did she lose a bet and has to wear this atrocity for a week?

I kind of respect Mrs. Astor. Is she a snob? Yeah. Is she a clever snob though? Hell yeah.

Raise your hand if you don’t trust Tom Raikes. *raises hand*

I mean… yeah I get it sex before marriage is a taboo so if you want to get some, you need to put a ring on it and blah blah blah but dude seems to be too hasty with proposal even for a horny teenager, let alone grownup gentleman.

Agnes is right about him, isn’t she? I bet he is an opportunist indeed. However, what can a middle class lawyer get from this marriage? Money? Nah, Marian is penniless and he knows it. Social status? Eh it isn’t of much use for him.

Unless she isn’t penniless after all. Remember they were talking about shares in railroad companies or something like that which he claims are worthless? What if they are actually worth a freaking fortune?!

Will it have something to do with the station George Russell is about to build? Maybe. IDK. It sounds reasonable now but we’ll see.

I still want to giggle every time George Russell is mentioned.

That freaking maid… She is too clever to seduce George just for the sake of seducing him.

Is she planning to become his mistress? Bitch please. Bertha will twist her neck.

Is she planning to blackmail him? Bitch please. George will twist her neck.

Someone wake Larry up.

Dude, remember that blond neighbour you were flirting with? Yeah it’s time to act. Now!

Give Gladys a sock and set her free.

I seriously try to look at it from 19th century perspective but boy oh boy.

Option #1: Oscar van Rhijn. Is he the worst thing that can happen to a young lady? *remembers what was said about late Mr. van Rhijn* Probably not.

Option #2: whatever her mother planned for her. That one sounds like Gladys is about to be shipped to England and search for a husband with a title. It worked for Cora from DA but a long time ago I’ve read about those American heiress who ended up totally miserable as a result of it so that sounds scary…

Option #3: the boy she mentioned. Archie? I cannot remember the name. Anyway, as Agnes van Rhijn said: ‘sounds dull enough to be respectable.’

I feel for John Adams who lies there imagining quiet life with Oscar and their three corgis while Oscar goes on and on about money and how wonderful Gladys is.

Marian gets on my nerves. Seriously, I get it: she’s strong, fearless, modern woman and all that stuff. But it’s 19th century higher society for Pete’s sake and Marian acts like a time traveler from 21st century. She seems to have no control over her mouth and just says the first thing that comes to her head. In the company of the family it might be sassy and endearing but with strangers she sounds really dumb.

Like how many times can she ask why they don’t include Mrs. Russell? Does she expect that if she asks it a hundred times, they’ll get tired and give up? I really struggle to understand this character.

On paper her lines are clever, in action though… She ain’t one and only dowager countess of Grantham. Sorry not sorry. She’s just too young and her position in society isn’t high enough for her to speak her mind so freely in public.

Ada still creeps me out at times but I felt really sorry for her.

However, it’s one more proof that Agnes sees right though people.

Peggy doesn’t deserve this shit. Period.

I should have seen it coming, right? Yet I didn’t. I was so happy for her and ugh. I hope when she becomes a famous novelist, she’ll write in one of her books something like ‘Dear assholes from The Christian Advocate, screw you!’

‘Do you think we should kneel?’ line aged well.

I naturally disliked Patrick and Anne Morris. They deserved punishment for their actions but daaaamn not like that. I didn’t expect this show to go so far.

How many brain cells does Anne have? Zero?

Somehow Aurora Fane pisses me off even more than Anne.

The boy toy theory… yep I was an idiot.