#does anyone feel this ache and guilt and shame deep within their chests whenever you are reminded of certain characters?

[mrburnsnuclearpussy]

ILL NEVER BE THE MEN EVERYBODY TALKS ABOUT

[jeonggukingdom]

splinters of love  • day XXIV [myg]

pairing  ⟶ min yoongi x fem!Reader

summary  ⟶ a collection of drabbles (one for each day of April) based on prompts by an online prompts’ generator site. Specifically  ⟶  • day XXIII ↳ in which Yoongi is teaching you how to kiss because you’ve never done it before but you end up getting him all flustered when you suddenly place a quick kiss on his pouty lips.

genre  ⟶ fluff, a bit of angst

rating  ⟶  PG-17

word count ⟶ 1.892 words

warnings  ⟶ cheating and heartbreaks are mentioned, overall it’s pretty precious ahah

series masterlist  ⟶ here  (links on mobile may not work, if you’re looking for all the works in this series, you can click on the “!splintersoflove” tag and you’ll find them all there!)

“You want me to teach you how to kiss?”

Yoongi’s usually soft voice is laced with bewilderment and confusion—neither of which you can really blame him for considering the nature of your sudden request.

The truth is that you are nervous. Nervous about kissing anyone and sucking greatly at it despite the fact that you’ve done that—and more—a few times already. Lack of experience, you suppose, mixed pretty heavily with all of your insecurities.

You know it’s rather absurd to ask him this and it is also quite humiliating considering you are not in high school anymore and you supposedly had a boyfriend for the past two years or so before your break up but the thing is… he was the only one you’ve ever been with and well, despite what you always told your friends, it wasn’t the greatest but at that time, you did not mind because as they say, love is blind.

You join your hands together then, just as if you were about to pray to God for salvation or something but instead, it is Yoongi that you are facing with your pleading eyes, pouting lips and preposterous request.

“Please, Yoongi, please.”

He sighs loudly, closes his eyes as he shakes his head left and right as he clearly struggles with himself to either accept or decline your sudden and quite desperate demand.

“I can’t help but ask you why? It’s not like you haven’t kissed anyone before…”

His voice trails off and you hang your head in shame, your lips forming a tight line as your heart shrinks within your chest. Yoongi has been your best friend ever since elementary school and you’d trust him with your life, you really would but your heart and soul… they feel too delicate at times, so much so that you never fully expose them to anyone, let alone the people you cherish so dearly it would crush you to disappoint.

You heave out a sigh as you decide to let at least a few veils strip off the inner portion of yourself to make him glimpse right between your chest and see it all, even for just a second.

“Yeah but Jae wasn’t exactly… you know he cheated on me all the time, Yoongi and I feel like part of it was because I couldn’t satisfy him…”

Your voice turns small as you go down that path, the ache and scars it left on your heart and the doubts that piled up one atop the other for months after you discovered his cheating habits, the number of girls that have been sleeping right inside his bed where you did every single weekend.

Yoongi had held you all that time, pulled you back together whenever you felt like crumbling down into pieces but even then, you didn’t have the guts to admit why it hurt so bad you could barely breathe.

He calls your name softly and it makes your eyes glisten with unshed tears. You have tormented yourself for months for this and you didn’t tell anyone because what if it really is like that? What if Jae was seeking in other girls what you simply couldn’t give to him?

The fear of going through all of that paralyzes you most of the times. Lord knows how many dates you have declined because you were scared to put your heart back on the line and fail once more.

“Hey, look at me,” Yoongi’s fingers come in contact with your chin and you have no choice but lift your head up until you’re staring inside his big eyes.

You expect to see pity in there but you find nothing but love and comprehension in them.

“Ok, I’ll do it.”

Your mouth opens into a perfect ‘oh’ as you stare at him in shock because hell, you had hoped for him to say yes all this time but a part of you thought it would never work, not even after exposing your true self so much.

“But are you sure it’s not going to make things awkward between us?”

You smile at him, shake your head a couple of times as you exhale loudly while your limbs finally relax.

“Please, you’re like my brother.”

Yoongi doesn’t comment on that and truly, that would have been suspicious in any other given moment but you are far too excited right now to notice and question.

“Ok.”

Yoongi bites on his bottom lip, tilts his head to the side and then with a deep sigh he cuts the distance between the two of you until you can almost breathe in his scent, feel his warmth against your body.

“First thing, you should ease into it, you know, set the mood.”

You nod your head a couple of times as you shift even closer to him. Yoongi offers you a gentle smile before placing one of his hands on your cheek to guide you a little towards him.

“Maintain eye contact,” he whispers as his breath fans your skin.

You can’t stop looking inside his eyes anyways… you’ve never seen him so up close and you realise now how absolutely mesmerizing he is, especially when his eyes are slightly closed and his head tilted to welcome your mouth on his.

It feels nice, warm even and absolutely nothing like kissing Jae looked and felt like.

Maybe it’s the shift in mood that does it, maybe it’s his eyes or the way he licks his lips as he inches closer still or maybe you are just too eager but, next thing you know, you are crushing your lips on top of his and he is gasping in the kiss.

It lasts for around two seconds before you pull yourself back, cheeks flaming hot and bottom lip trapped under your teeth as you stare at him expectantly.

“Was that ok?”

Yoongi’s eyes are big now, staring at you in utter shock while his cheeks quickly turn pink under your gaze.

He clears his throat a couple of times, forces his eyes to shift away from you as he scratches the back of his head as he always does when he needs to settle himself.

“Was it that bad?” Your voice turns small, your hands tightly grasping the fabric of your shirt as your heart starts beating frantically against your ribcage.

“No, it’s not that, you… you just took me by surprise.”

He heaves out a sigh as he pulls his gaze back on you offering you a thin smile that does absolutely nothing to settle your nerves. He is being polite, that’s what it is.

“I’m sorry.” Your voice is small as you say so, your insides knotting together as you think about all the times you kissed Jae just like this.

Suddenly you feel nauseous.

Deep down you know it was never your fault, deep down you realise that if he truly loved you he simply would have not sought another woman’s touch under any circumstance but the doubts, the insecurities… they are all burning inside of you now with the force of a thousand suns.

You are so engrossed into your own thoughts that you barely register Yoongi’s movements or his words and then suddenly, you are staring inside his eyes again, his hand his back on your cheek and he is looking at you with so much adoration you think you might literally combust before him.

“Yoongi?” You ask in a whisper but the rest of your question dies down as he slowly inches forward until your lips are almost touching again.

Your eyes close automatically, your head tilting a little to the side as your noses bump together.

Your lips part a little, a sigh escaping from them as you feel his brushing against yours.

This kiss is not rushed like yours nor rough like Jae’s but rather sweet, slow and… precious.

His lips feel nice against yours, they move gently on top of your mouth and the longer he kisses you like this, holds you there under his grasp, the more you find yourself melting into him.

Your hands move on their own accord, they tangle in his locks, pull a little on them to bring him closer and he grunts into the kiss in what you can only assume to be appreciation. So you do it again because the sound is so delectable you’d love to hear it over and over again.

And Yoongi grunts you this wish as well as he pulls you into him further, allows his tongue to move past your lips so it can dance with yours and with each passing second you lose yourself into him a bit more.

You whimper into the kiss as his hands move away from your face to grasp your hips instead, you sigh as he pushes you down onto the bed so that he can kiss you even deeper while lodging himself right between your legs.

You call his name, bite his bottom lip while arching your back into him and it is then that he ends the kiss.

His breath is ragged, his cheeks flaming red and his eyes big with shock again. Shock and… regret?

“I can’t do this.”

He moves away from you in an instant and your heart absolutely plummets in your chest. What have you done?

Yoongi is by the door in an instant and it feels like you can’t breathe all of a sudden, it feels like the whole world is spinning way too fast for you to catch up and you are positive this time you are going to be actually sick.

“Wait!” You run after him, wrap your hand around his wrist and hold him there, confusion and fear written all over your features as you stare up at him.

“I should’ve never said yes, I’m sorry.”

Yonngi can’t even look you in the eyes now and you could swear you can hear your heart breaking into thousands of pieces before him.

“Why… why?” You whimper, your bottom lip quivering as you start fearing this is the end of your friendship after so many years together.

You can’t looe Yoongi. You simply can’t.

“Because I like you, damn it!” He wrenches his arm away from your grip, lifts his gaze to fix it on your face and there are so many emotions written all over his features it makes you dizzy.

Rage, guilt, shame, pain. And you put all of them there.

“I can’t do this. I… I don’t think I’ll be able to stop if…” He grimaces at his own words, turns his head to the side while closing his eyes.

It’s happening all so fast, way too fast for you to keep up but you know one thing for sure: the way you felt when he said those words. The way your heart melted and started thumping hard against your ribs, the way your knees buckled, the way your breath itched.

I like you.

You grab his face with your hands, pull him towards you and then, you kiss him. Not rushed and quick like before, no, you truly kiss him just like he showed you and it’s when you cannot breathe anymore, when you need to pull your lips away from his and stare inside his beautiful eyes that you say it:

“But I like you, too.”

Copyright © 2020 by jeonggukingdom. All rights reserved. Do not repost, do not steal, do not translate without consent.

[norafike]

Despite all this, I still love you 10

*Contains spoilers for Chapter 3 mission; A short walk in a pretty town.

Depictions of violence, please read at your own risk as the material can be unsettling for viewers.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It took a day or more's journey to travel as far as Rhodes from the business she underwent back at Valentine. Even longer due to Maggie's distraction.

The female hitched her horse near the Gunsmith, noticing the unsettling silence that haunted the town. Nobody could be seen for miles and the store's looked empty whenever she peered through the windows inside. She wondered why Arthur sent the letter, requesting for her help, given that there was not a soul around.

“Hello?” She called out for nothing, expecting something to call back to her. Silence was met and so she decided to walk deeper, seeing where the men she was meant to meet lurked. “Arthur?.. Sean?”

She saw them eventually, hiding near a building all talking amongst themselves. She smiled at Sean and took a stand near him before whistling for her horse to trot on over to where they waited. She tethered him to the correct post, standing near. “How are you feelin' gentlemen?”

Micah snorted the minute she opened her mouth, gripping his gun belt and kicking his leg up onto a crate near to trap her between him and her animal. “Jus' fine, yourself?”

She tried not to visibly cringe once he spoke up, but could not help but scrunch up her nose in disgust. She used the tip of her finger to push him away. “I was doin' so much better before you started talkin', Mr. Bell.”

“I feel like we've gotten close enough, call me Micah.” He grinned and she had to bite her tongue to not snap back at him. “Of course, I'd like to know you.. a little better.”

“A shame I'm gettin' to know Kieran a little better first.” And Sean let out a roar of a laugh at her subtle way of dismissing his offer, this displeasing Micah enough that he left her alone.

"I am only kidding of course." She made it known so none of them would go ahead and tease the poor boy when they returned to camp, after all he was not considered highly amongst the group and the last thing he needed was someone taking her words the wrong way.

Micah snorted again before walking away from the female, ignoring her subtle giggles from behind and taking the lead with Sean on their walk into town. It had been far too quiet for Nora's liking before but now, while they were exposed like how they were.. well she felt more uneasy than ever.

“None of it feels right.” She mumbled under her breathe, going unnoticed by the others. They talked before Arthur raised his voice over them, finally addressing the situation and repeating what Nora had said earlier.  Sean turned around. “Now none of it feels right?” His accent was thicker here but before anyone had time to process what they were saying and shot rang out, setting them into ‘fighter’ mode. Nobody had noticed Sean, yet.

She covered her ears as she followed the men behind cover, finally taking a moment to compose herself and assess the situation. Here, she counted visible faces and let out a choked sob when she counted one short; Sean not being present. Nora faced Arthur, fear reflecting in his eyes and through a shaky voice managed to ask him the dreaded question. “Where's Sean?” He frowned; not asking and instead taking her deeper into the alley they hid in once the bullets to close to be comfortable.

“We'll worry about Sean later.. are you okay to fight? I feel we got half the family after us.” She slowly nodded to answer. “Good.”

He ran out of the alley, both revolvers in hand and began to fire blindly down the road. She watched until he disappeared around the corner, taking a shaky breath she soon followed, her revolver in hand.

“Sean.” Her voice was small once she noticed the boy lying in the dirt, an unmistakable pool of blood around him and only growing. With the little strength she had left she managed to force herself into hiding behind a few crates, her vision growing more blurry from the tears that kept falling. She wasn't even trying to hit anything, only shooting behind her to make it seem as though she was helping but in reality she was only trying to not blackout as she always does. Her voice was called by an invisible creature, sounding similar to Lem but not quite her friend but it was familiar enough to feel safe.. she focused on it, it repeating one phrase over and over. ‘Come back to me, Nora.’ The very thing Lemuel had said that night with the flammable-moonshine explosion. It kept her distracted and it kept her awake..

“Stay low, girl.” Arthur seemingly appeared from nowhere, crouching by her side and shooting in any direction he heard bullets. He knew of what happened to Nora in situations like this, seeing it many times before and when the reality of Sean's fate kicked in the thought of preventing Nora's emerged. “I'm stayin' low. Make way to the General Store and sneak around the back through there, bastards are hidin' away where we can't see 'em.”

“And risk endin' up like Sean?”

“You can stay here, but I'm going. Prevent you lot endin' up like the kid.” With that she made haste over to the shop, ignoring Arthur's cries for her to run back. It was silent inside but that didn't mean she wasn't careful creeping through, her gun entering or leaving a room before she did at all times. She presumed that Micah and Bill dealt with a lot of the Gray's as the numbers were thinner now, but that didn't mean she didn't take out any herself.. feeling no guilt in doing so either.

“Bastards.” She cursed under her breath as she searched for the remaining bunch.. slowly finding one cowering behind a few barrels. He begged for his life, raising his hands in the air. She staggered for a moment, moving to holster her weapon and the man began to thank her for her “generousity” yet Sean had so much stripped away from him and she remembered it quickly. She put the gun away, opting for a more *satisfying kill and using her knife, she placed the steel against the man's neck and cut as deep as allowed. His blood ran down her hands, onto her lap and he fell lifeless.

She didn't notice the blood, didn't care for it.

…

“Where's Williamson?” She asked; met with silence from the two men who provided no answer.

“Well..?”

“We don't know, lady. Why, you gonna kill him too?” Micah spat and without thinking she lunged towards, gripping the lapels of his jacket and pushing him back. He made contact with the side of the wall, gasping with the wind knocked out of him and not expecting such a small woman to have this much strength, she was almost as feisty as Mrs. Adler and he admired her for it. “No, but I'll kill you asshole.” She shouted and finally Arthur stepped in, wrapping his arm around Nora and pulling her off of the antagonistic individual.

“You're fucking crazy, woman.” Micah hadn't learned his lesson.

“Enough!” Arthur yelled; scowling at the pair of them. “Let's find Bill and get out of here.”

“Whatever.” Nora grunted, walking past the men and back down towards the gunsmith. Arthur watched after her, maintaining a distance as he soon followed behind. She wasn't in any place to be alone right now and he knew it.

“Stop right there!” Sherrif Gray in his bitter tone called out, revolver pointed straight for Nora. She froze in her tracks and raised her hands, looking at the group with a fake smile. In some man's arms she noticed Bill and subtly pointed at him so Arthur could see.

The two finally joined her, Micah on her right and Arthur on her left so she stood perfectly in front of Leigh Gray. How she could spit at his name, a disgusting roach of a man she never had any liking for.. the killing of her only friend which he allowed being the final straw and so god help her she was going to make sure he got what he owed. “You gonna let our friend go, Leigh?”

“I plan on takin' you all in.. or killin' ya if need be.” He replied; his threat meeting deaf ears. She didn't care, couldn't find it within her. “That a threat..? Or a promise?” And Micah looked over astonished as she continued teasing him.

“I ain't playin' games girl-.” Leigh began, but Nora raised her hands to dismiss him. “Never said this was no game, jus' let my friend go.”

“Ain't gonna happen.”

“Very Well.” She was quick, just as skilled as Arthur and unexpecting. A few shots were fired and the Gray's fell, some falling off of the porch of the gunsmith and onto the roads.

Bill clambered forward, completely astonished but holding thanks he needed to pass on. He placed a sweaty palm on her shoulder, reluctantly muttering a quiet ‘thanks’ and walking away.

“Sean.” She cried before running over to the body. The thrill died down and reality kicked her in the face with a steel toe cap boot. Her friend really had been killed, his face disfigured and unrecognisable and her chest tightened when she saw him lying there, on the ground. Her brave face shriveled and she let out sobs, earning an eye roll from Micah but a gentle pat regardless. “Bill, take the boy an' get him buried. I'm gonna ride with Nora back to camp, I don't think she should be alone.”

She chuckled at Arthur's instruction, despite there being no humour behind it. “I'm twenty-four. I can look after myself.”

“Trust me, I know that. I've seen it.” He replied with a light smile. “Jus' need an excuse for me not to be seen alone cryin'.” She laughed as he tried to lighten the situation, there was no time for mourning.

“Come on, let's get you out of here.”

She managed to wipe away a small tear, following him over to Casper and climbing into the saddle without fail despite an ache in her muscles slowly kicking in. Everything coming down and having an effect. “Thank you.” She managed to whisper, following Arthur out of the town.

“It ain't nothin'.”

[optimizche]

Angelic: The Archangel (Park Chanyeol/Reader)

All chapters

Five months ago 

A fond smile tugged at Junmyeon's lips, his eyes following her form as she swam toward him. Deep within her secret gardens in Heaven, amidst thickets of roses and tulips and magnolias and lilies, was a small lake. Filled with cool, crystal clear water that shimmered in the light of the sun. His little sister was fond of taking dips in the lake whenever she could. She loved to swim.

"Jun!" she called out to him when she broke the surface of the water. "Aren't you coming in?"

As much as Junmyeon adored swimmimg with her, racing laps down the length of the lake, this time he was engrossed in reading a book that he had brought along with himself from Earth.

"Not today, princess," he responded, his eyes never leaving the pages of the book.

She let out a huff, her full lips turning into an adorable pout. "The water is so nice, Jun!"

Junmyeon felt himself chuckle at her tenacious insistence. His little sister was so loveable. And being the oldest, he always, eventually gave in to her every whim.

His eyes were poring over the words of Charles Dickens and he was just about to turn the page, when he felt her hand upon his, her skin wet against his, startling him.

She had swum to the shore, where he was sitting. Taking his hand in hers, she lowered the book, setting it down on the grass beside Junmyeon's knee.

"What will it take for me to entice you, Jun?" she asked him, her eyes almost doe-like in their innocence as she regarded him.

And Junmyeon felt something stir in him. It was an emotion alien to the Archangel of Heaven, but he could only feel it grow stronger the longer he looked at her.

She looked like a water-nymph, her entirely bare skin drenched in the refreshing water of the lake, her damp hair flowing down her back in a waterfall.

As if she needed anything more to entice him.

Teeth digging into her bottom lip, she shyly reached out and began to undo the laces of his shirt. He immediately understood and began to undress in the earnest, until he was as naked as her.

Grasping his hands in hers, she pulled him into the water, taking him with her until they stood in the middle of the lake.

Junmyeon was in a trance of sorts, feeling a strange hunger clawing at his heart the longer he looked at her. Perhaps it was the fact that deep down within himself, he was lonely and had been so for centuries, before she came along. Of course, he had his brothers. And as protective as Junmyeon was of all his younger brothers, he did not bear the same love and affection for them in his heart, as he did for his little sister. Since the day of her creation, since the moment she came into existence, Junmyeon felt a deep and extraordinary attachment toward her. Maybe it was because she was one of her kind, a female angel. Or maybe it was his secret craving for a love that was forbidden to his kind.

All Junmyeon knew was that he loved her. And that he would do anything for her.

She was oblivious to his thoughts, giggling as she decided to splash water at her oldest brother.

The sudden attack wrenched him out of his reverie and he turned to her with mock anger. "Oh you'll pay for this!"

She laughed. "You'll have to catch me first, Jun!" she exclaimed, before darting beneath the surface of the water.

Junmyeon smiled and shot after her, the strength of his muscles propelling him forward beneath the surface of the water. He caught up with her with ease.

Fingers wrapping around her ankle, he gave her a playful tug, before pulling her into his arms, both of them laughing loudly.

"You caught me!" she giggled, turning in his arms to face him.

Junmyeon felt a flush rising in his cheeks at the feel of her bare skin against his, trying not to concentrate on how incredible the swell of her breasts felt pressing into his chest.

But it was impossible to ignore how she was affecting him.

This is wrong, he tried to reason with himself. Such thoughts are forbidden for our kind.

"What's wrong, Myeon?" she asked him, her voice melodious in its innocence, her delicate fingers threading into his dark hair.

"N-nothing," he stuttered, a sudden shiver going through his body at the feeling of the tips of her fingers skimming against his scalp.

"You're trembling," she observed quietly, moving even closer. "Are you cold?"

He shook his head, trying so desperately to keep his fraying composure intact. But he was failing. Miserably.

The heat of her flesh in all its suppleness was calling out to him. Like a siren. All he wanted to do was part her legs and slide snug into her warmth...

No. This is wrong.

All hint of the previous playfulness was gone from her when she moved even closer to him, her eyes examining his face intently.

Junmyeon was in agony, his gaze flitting between her eyes and her parted lips. Her closeness to him made him want to kiss away the droplets of freshwater caressing her rose-petal lips. He wanted to kiss and kiss her until she moaned his name in a broken, sinful gasp. Her proximity to him driving him to the brink of madness, overruling his mind with thoughts of wanting to...

He released her immediately, backing away. Withdrawing from her embrace. Snapping out of his trance.

"I...I...Father wanted to have a word with me," he muttered, fabricating a lame excuse.

She looked crestfallen, the pain of being pushed away so abruptly etched clearly on her features. And by God, did Junmyeon want to comfort her.

He wanted to gather her in his arms and love her with every ounce of light embedded in his being. He wanted to consume her and allow himself to be consumed by her.

But it was all forbidden.

He turned his back to her with great reluctance, his heart screaming at him to go to her and not away from her.

Walking to the shore, he began to dress, wordlessly.

"Did you want me to come with you?" she asked and he chewed the inside of his cheek, trying so hard to avoid interpreting her question as anything else.

"No," he lied. Again. "You carry on, my darling. I'll see you later," he said, pulling on his shirt in much haste before walking away as swiftly as he could.

________

He was in the privacy of his chambers, standing at the foot of his bed, naked.

Biting down upon the fullness of his lip, he suppressed his groans, eyes scrunched shut. Fingers wrapped firm around his aching, hardened length, Junmyeon stroked himself. Over and over. Imagining that she was on his bed and it was her that he was plunging into.

More than anything in the world, Junmyeon wanted her. The only one thing that he could never have.

When the deed was done and he stood, gasping, his fingers stained with his pearly effluent, he realized, to his utter shame, what he had done.

In all his millenia worth of existence, Junmyeon had never lied.

Today, he had lied to her.

In all his life, Junmyeon had refrained from indulging his carnal desires.

Today, he had touched himself to the thought of her.

Two grave sins, committed by the Archangel of Heaven.

And the weight of his shame and disgrace threatened to drown him.

He sank to his knees, his heart aching and his eyes stinging with tears unshed.

Guilt felt like lead, weighing down his heart and clawing at him cruelly.

In this moment, he felt truly envious of humans. And of demons as well. These beings were free to do as they pleased, without having to answer to anyone.

They weren't bound and constrained by laws, like Angels were and they could live their lives on their own terms. They didn't have to answer to God at every turn and-

"What am I doing?!" Junmyeon muttered to himself in incredulity.

These thoughts...they were blasphemous.

Jealousy was a sin!

He sank to the floor, tears running down his cheeks freely now.

In the span of half a day, the truth of his feelings had made him sin. Thrice.

Lies.

Lust.

Envy.

In his entire life, Junmyeon had upheld himself to a higher level of behaviour, wanting to set an example for his younger siblings.

But today, he had sinned.

"No one must know of this," Junmyeon murmured, clasping his hands together and bowing his head in prayer. "No one must know."

And he prayed, clasping his soiled, sodden hands, the Archangel prayed.

[ikonislife]

Shame 2

Junhoe x Reader

Angst, Smut, CEO!Junhoe

Warning: Mature content.

Somewhere in between his haughty smirk and sultry whispers, you let yourself lost in a path of no return with the man who doesn’t love anyone... Or does he?

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | Final

“I think the whole party heard you by now, love. Didn’t peg you as a screamer.”

His voice echoed across the dark empty room, uneasiness rising within the pit of your stomach but at the sound of the low growl of neediness commanding an answer, you had no mind to care for the curious way the walls seemed to be amplifying every sound.

“Sorry..I can’t help it… Shit…”

But to your disappointment, Junhoe pulled away leaving you feeling empty and cold from the lack of his tongue. You pushed yourself off the table, wondering what he had gotten up to but was met with perhaps the most mesmerizing sight, Junhoe leaning back in his chair, chest heaving heavily and you realized just how immersed he was, how far he let himself get lost in pleasing you. His lips coated in your nectar, nose too was glistening with wetness that made you want to lick it all off of him… And so you did. He sat still, feeling the desperation in your little fingertips gripping at his crisp white shirt, tugging away his loosen tie and simply smirked when he felt your tongue cleaning up every bit of yourself left over on his features. His eyes cold and piercing, staring you down with almost disdain and haughtiness but he did nothing when you settled on his lap, arms locking at the nape of his neck. Your lips needy, moulding and sucking at his lips then trailing up his nose, you lap at his intensely sharp jaws before sucking a wet spot at the base of his neck. It was only now that his hands returned to your body, gripping your waist so harshly you could feel the blooming of bruises already on your once flawless skin. He nipped at your earlobe, dragging his tongue down to your bare collar bone before scrapping his teeth against it, bitting then sucking no doubt leaving his own marking, claiming you as his. Junhoe leans in closer, that dangerous smirk teasing on his lips as he whispered something you’d never in a million year could conjure up even with that gutter mind of yours.

“Did you think you were fucking special?” Suddenly you felt bare, vulnerable and exposed even though Junhoe was no longer intimately making himself acquaintance with your body.

“What?” Hands grasping at your loosely hung straps, desperately to cover yourself with what little fabric he had left you with.

“Did you think you were special?” He growled once more, the sharpness of his eyes, that distasteful curl of the lips whenever he was disappointed, disapproving were all back as those beautiful features slashes at your every inch of skin. “A doll good for passing time suddenly thinks she’s a princess? Give me a break.”

“N-No…”

“No?” He scoffs and never before had you felt so inferior, so degraded and there is no describing the pain coursing through your veins. “Did you think I was going to take you out to a nice fancy dinner? And what, live happily ever after? You must be daff, insane if you think I would just hand over my status and money to some stupid girl that couldn’t keep it in her pants. If all it took me was a few charming smiles and a well-placed white lies for compliment, I can’t imagine what else you’d do had I actually tried.”

Your heart sunk to the deepest depth they had ever been to, not even getting a glass of 1900’s exorbitant wine dumped on your head by that rich douchebag at your part time all those years ago couldn’t compare… Because this, this is a personal insult. At the least you know that pompous ass was only putting up a very pretentious front for the woman that was much too beautiful and graceful for the ugly person that he was. It was pointless drama over the wrong wine. 

Without commanding them to, not the tear you’ve been holding back not from pain but from the pleasure derived from the torture but bitter tears. Bitter because you knew you shouldn’t but did, bitter because you thought he cared.

“I can’t imagine what else you’d do had I actually tried.”

The next moment your feet were already hitting the ground sprinting, you ran and ran but no matter how far, that hauntingly chilling sentence wouldn’t let you escape its cold fingers. No matter how much you tried, the contempt spewing from his lips, the dirty looks, you couldn’t escaped them. 

“I can’t imagine what else you’d do had I actually tried.”

You screamed but all that came out was silent, a silent cry for help that only seemed to amplify the scorns and jeers. The hours long you had spent plastering your face with pounds of makeup wasted as the tears streamed down your cheeks. You thought the worst was over, the hurt had been done but what you hadn’t expected was where your feet had carried your dishevel self.

“Are you alright, Y/n?” A kind face, Mark from HR so gentle with that mesmerizing smile. “You look a bit cold, here take this!” 

A warm jacket wrapped around your shivering shoulders as he lead you across the crowded lobby, people smiled and greeted the both of you but non seemed to be shook at your Cinderella-eques self, not the princess at the ball but the one that had lead to her meeting with the fairy godmother. Something in the way his hand so tightly woven around your aching shoulder, the way he’d occasionally gave it a soft squeeze as if reassuring everything will be alright got you in a trance. So you let your eyes fluttered close, letting yourself get lost in the vast ocean that was his addicting mix of whiskey and expensive cologne. 

Mark is your fairy godmother.

“Look everyone, Y/n just came down from a “one on one” with the boss,” A loud cheer erupted along with whistles and catcalls. “We all know what that mean, don’t we?”

You couldn’t believe your ears, that soft voice that had been so caring suddenly raged with all the contempt, all the derisiveness the world could bestowed upon one person. You wanted to disappear, to blink and be back in your warm bed but when they opened, all you could see was sly smiles and gasps of judgment.

“Mark, what are you doing. No, I-“

“Don’t worry, Y/n. We all know what a good little pet you’ve been for the boss.”

No matter how much you pried, what force you gave, Mark’s hands around your waist holding you back for the world to taunt would only grew stronger. You begged but it went unheard as if a lonely leaf floating in the wind, useless and fragile, as if your words carried no meaning. Then at the height of it all joined the arrogant Mr. Koo with all of his scorn and condescending jeer.

“I can’t imagine what else you’d do had I actually tried.”

All you could do was screamed, screamed until your voice hoarse and throat sore. You screamed but their laughters always louder and before you knew it, your consciousness slipped through the crack of time and-

“Y/N. GODDAMN IT, Y/N. WAKE UP!”

Cold sweat breaking, you felt as if the weight of the word had just been lifted off your shoulders, as if you had just stepped away from the edge of a cliff.

“What? Irene? What are you doing here?” throat dries, funny enough you actually felt like you had just been fucked by the world as you stammered your confusion away.

“Well you screamed your ass off, so I came over. God, you’re drenched. Come on, let’s get these clothes off before you get sick.”

No mind nor strength to fight against Irene’s caring hands even if you felt sick to your stomach and wanting nothing more but to melt away into the night, your body limp as she tugs away the wet pieces of clothing and replaces them with fresh one. Only now did you notice the pants heavy in your chest and the shiver still coursing through your pale cold hands. Your mind hazy and has it not for Irene’s constant sweet chatter lulling you toward reality, you couldn’t, wouldn’t be able to distinguish whether this was a dream or the real world.

“I’m sure you don’t wanna talk about it so, drink this and get some sleep. We’ll deal with this tomorrow morning.” As understanding as ever, a mug of warm tea shoved into your hands and with a blink of an eye, Irene disappeared back out the door with one last understanding smile even though she probably has no clue what was going on in your brain. Although judging by the concern clouding those brilliant eyes and the questionable bit of the lip, Irene knows exactly the cause of your horrendous screams.

Somewhere across the city, across all the tax brackets and fortified private community walls, Junhoe finds himself tossing and turning with the guilt of words like knives eating away at his heart. Warm bed and heavenly soft blanket abandoned, he treks in search of the poison that will surely bring him sleep even if the price for a few decent snooze would be the hammering headache by tomorrow morn. As the cool breeze of a peaceful night brushing against his skin, he took a sip and marvels at the disgustingly polluted sky above with a sigh of disapproval. Not even a dot of stars, not even the moon could fight against the cloudiness as it shies away from the world below.

Suddenly but perhaps not unexpected, Junhoe’s mind flooding with euphoria as the lackluster sky above only reminded him of the insatiable craving growing deep within his heart to see once more the way your eyes shined so brilliantly as if they possessed the universe within them whenever a sweet smile was gracing his day, making it just a bit brighter. The way his name danced so beautifully even if the only two times he had ever had the pleasure of hearing you called him were either with the utmost respect during work hour and the sinful cries of overtime. Just the simple act of you uttering his name alone leaving his imagination running wild.

He wonders what it would sound like had you met at the age when first love was blooming and the only thing dictating his life was teenage hormone. Although if he must be realistic, you’d still be moaning his name by the end of the night so at least that part remained the same. 

Would it be any sweeter, had you been the first girl he had learned to love. Perhaps the rowdy days of high school is a rather bad example for the way his heart now seems to be singing your name but that feeling within his gut, the churning and fluttering, that is definitely reminiscent of the good old teenage days.

Would it be much more endearing had you met when he realized the love he once experienced as a young lad had done nothing to prepare him for the pain brought upon his young naïve self, mistaking that love can conquer all. Junhoe is certain he’d have been head over heels for your adorable self just as he is now and no doubt in his mind you’d have teach him a lesson or two on love. 

Nowadays, love for him resembles the sun… Not that he thinks of it as sunshine, daisy, and sweet honey but rather the sun to Icarus, the boy who flown too high. He loved and he flew, he was so high and he got hurt. It’s something grand, something magnificent but it’s also something impossible, something unobtainable. Happily ever after is only a fairytale and this cold, harsh life of a young CEO is anything but that as he closed himself off from all possibility of entrusting his heart away.

Your smile carried him to the moon and back but soon the cloud of solemn spread over the precious memories of happier days as those harsh words thrash about his consciousness. It was out of character, so bizarre the way he had behaved especially toward someone so special, the second those grand doors had shut out the fading clicking of your heels, Junhoe had collapsed, a shiver ran deep within his veins at the realization of what he had just done… He had turned into his father, worse, his grandfather. 

In no way was his father anything but the most perfect husband and dad in the world but the man he was at work, that person was in every way shape and form someone Junhoe aspires not to be. It was as if his father had possessed dual personality disorder, a kind loving man turned into a monster the moment the perfectly polished shoes and impeccable suit meticulously cloaked over every last bit of humanity he had. Junhoe despised the way he treated everyone as if they were simply dirt beneath his shoesm the scowl that was permanent upon his lips, how everything and anything could become personal.

Now his grandfather, the legacy, or rather stain as Junhoe and his father liked to remind everyone, the stain he had left behind was something of the unsavory sort, something his father had worked to the bones to rid and Junhoe still doing his best to not falling into the beaten path. He was for lack of better terms, a sleaze and as faithful as the second hand on a clock. Junhoe had been appalled, revolted by the words spreading on the grapevine of his womanizing way even before he had step foot into the company. He didn’t understand the flirty looks and sweet words being thrown his direction regardless of the gender, the disrespects he had thought. It wasn’t until his father had officially handing over the reign that the dirty past got dredged up. Suddenly his father action didn’t seem so harsh, suddenly the preconceived reputation of himself didn’t seemed so farfetched any longer.

It had been a near three years since his dad had left the throne for sunshine and Mai Tais by the beach with the love of his life, near three years since Junhoe ascended into this vicious world. He had been good, he swears on his life that he was much more than his predecessors, and everyone would agree. Yet the moment Junhoe saw the fear flashing in your doe eyes, so scared, so terrified of the monster that had shadowed everything he worked so hard to achieved, he knew he had lost it all to a few moments of irrationality. The way your shoulders shivers and body so small against the cold metal of the elevator instead of his arms… Your tears… Maybe Junhoe isn’t any better, maybe him trying so hard to prove otherwise to a world already fearing a person he isn’t did just the opposite… And this curse, the Koo family curse upon the men is something inevitable, something out of his grasp. All he could hope to do now is to mend the bridge he had so cruelly broken yet for reasons not at all unknown to Junhoe, reality as he suspects much grimmer than the last flicker of pipe dream that you’d still look at him with those stars filled eyes. The bridge, after all might be nothing now but ashes and lingering pain that he will never be able to erase because what woman would willingly give her heart to a man that could offer nothing beyond his dick and unkind words.  

Here’s a collection of Mr. Koo in suits to distract you from the fact that this part was waaaaay shorter than the first (: