#do you think they were like Nah hes too gay for this. and scrapped it HAHAJDNQJJDJW /J /J /J | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

calpalirwin · 4 years ago

Text

Tough Act

Summary: Lip may have finally met his match.

A/N: A season 4/season 5 AU of sorts. My first Shameless/Lip Gallagher fic too, so fuck off if it sucks.

Content: Swearing, fighting, fucked up-ness.

Word Count: 4.3k

And away, and away we go!

The door to the lecture room slammed open, averting everyone’s attention to the teenager rushing into the closest empty seat. Underneath the sea of unruly brown curls was a face red from the exertion of his run across campus in a blind hurry. There was a wild look in his crystal blue eyes as he tore his backpack apart, digging around for a notebook and pen, and a flash of agitation as he came up empty-handed. The adrenaline of his bad morning made all his movements swift as he frantically scanned around to figure out who to ask to help him out of his predicament.

“Psst,” he whispered, his rushing about coming to a standstill as he stopped on the girl seated to his left. “Psst… hey!”

“What?” she whispered back in annoyance, her lips barely moving, her attention still fully on the professor who continued with their lecture.

“You got a spare scrap of paper. And, uh… a pen? I seemed to uh…”

“Forgot to charge your precious laptop?” she questioned with the same note of annoyance.

“Oh, you think I’m one of these snobs?” he smirked, gaze flickering about the room. “Nah. Rough morning.”

Her eyes rolled as she reached wordlessly into her bag at her feet, producing a notebook with a pen tucked into the spirals. “Here,” she hissed, handing it over.

“Oh, I don’t need the whole th-”

“Don’t care. Now, shut the fuck up.”

“Thanks.”

“The fuck did I just say?”

The boy smirked again, but didn’t say another word, turning his attention to catch the rest of the lecture.

When the class was over, he ripped the pages free from the notebook, tucking the pen back in the spirals and handing it over. “Thanks again.”

“Keep it,” she said, pushing the notebook into his chest as she rose to her feet. “You clearly need it more than I do.”

Confused irritation flashed across his face as he followed her out of the classroom. “I was just trying to be nice. Fuck.”

She paused, turning on her heel to face him. Now that they were literally standing toe to toe, she got a good idea of just how tall he was as she found herself eye level with his chest. Or what would be his chest if it wasn’t covered in a white t-shirt sporting the words “Fuck you you fucking fuck” in blue block letters. The same color blue of the simple zip up hoodie he was also wearing. The kind of blue that really made his eyes pop as her chin tilted upwards to find his own gaze staring down at her, unchecked attitude in every sharp feature of his face. She crossed her arms, scoffing. “Are you saying I wasn’t nice back?”

“Look, if you’re gonna be a cold bitch, that’s fine. But why bother helping in the first place?”

“Right. Next time I’ll just let you keep pestering me, then.”

“I just said ‘thank you.’ What the fuck more do you want?! Jesus…”

“You’re welcome!” she snapped back. “Better?”

His temper gave way to cockiness as he flashed a grin. “See? Was that so hard? Can I buy you a coffee? Or like a new notebook?”

“Ugh, I don’t get you. One minute you’re pissed I helped you. The next you’re trying to flirt with me? Pick a side, loser.”

“It’s Lip, actually.”

Familiarity flashed in her eyes. “As in Gallagher?”

He chuckled lightly. “Yeah. How many Lips do you know? Wait… you know me? How?”

“Think you’re the only one from the South Side with a brain? I’m Mickey and Mandy’s cousin.”

“Oh shit! You’re a Milkovich?”

“A Y/L/N, actually. But yeah, I guess.”

“No shit, huh?”

“Yeah, what gave it away? The attitude, or the fact that I’m the only one in this place taking notes by hand?”

“Well, not the only one,” Lip chuckled, waving the notebook he had tucked under his arm.

“Right…” she said before walking off. After a few steps, she turned to look over her shoulder at him still standing there. “Well?” she demanded. “You buying me that coffee, or not?”

That trademark smirk graced his lips before he adjusted his backpack on his shoulder and jogged after her.

“So, how’d you end up here?” Lip asked as they pushed their way out of the building. He rubbed his hands together, blowing into them before digging into his pocket, producing a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. Lip shook the box at her in a silent question as he placed one between his lips and lit it.

She took one, and when she moved to take the lighter from him, he gave a small shake of his head. One of Lip’s hands cupped around the cigarette in her mouth, the other lighting it for her, before he took a long drag from his own cigarette. “You gonna answer my question?” he asked, pocketing the cigarettes and lighter.

“You didn’t really give me time before you asked a new one,” she responded, blowing a ring of smoke.

“Well?” Lip prompted, twisting his left wrist in a gesture to indicate for her to go ahead and answer.

“Like I said. You think you’re the only one from the South Side with a brain?”

“I mean… statistically no. But to get into a place like this? And afford it? What’s your secret? The Milkovichs fuckin’ got some dirt on someone? Can you get them to threaten them for me too?”

She rolled her eyes. “One, I got in here on my own. Two, I’m not a Milkovich. I may share a little blood, but I don’t share the name. Not that I’d want to anyway. Fuckin’ Terry trying to fuck the gay out of Mickey by having him fuck that Russian broad? Like he has several dipshit sons to pass on those disphit genes. Who gives a fuck if one of ‘em’s a raging homo?”

“Hey, that raging homo is fucking my brother. Watch it.”

She raised her hands in defense. “Like I give a shit who’s fucking whom. None of my damn business.”

“Whom, huh? Jesus, you are smart.”

“Yeah, and for a brainiac you’re fuckin’ slow. Smart isn’t a special Lip trait made just for you. Other people can have it too. Probably hard to see that though with your ego. Does that ever get heavy?”

“Ooo, she bites.”

“She happens to have a name. And I swear if you call me a Milkovich one more time, I’ll show you exactly how I’m not one by not pulling my punches for a Gallagher like some white trash version of Romeo and Juliet.”

It was his turn to hold up his hands in defense. “Shit, okay. Let’s see… a Y/L/N… My age, give or take a year in either direction… that makes you Y/N? Which makes you a junior. Impressive.”

“Is that an ‘impressive’ in regards to your stellar deduction skills? Or an ‘impressive’ in regards to me being a junior.”

“The latter. I’ve already almost dropped out like 6 times.”

“Mmm, then maybe you’re not as smart as you think you are, Lip. Spewing bullshit to illiterates is easy. Actually being smart though requires a little more work.”

“Alright, fuck me for being curious, but I don’t exactly see our kind around campus, do you?”

“That’s probably because we don’t go around flaunting that part of ourselves. We had our chance to get out, we took it, and then we didn’t bother looking back.”

“What like some take the kid out of the hood metaphorical shit? Wouldn’t the follow up to that mean that you can’t take the hood out of the kid?”

“Yeah, and that’s exactly why I’m constantly busting my ass to keep up with these silver spoon trust fund brats. It was easy in high school. Pay attention every now and again, and you don’t have to bother with cracking a book to be labeled a genius. Big fish, small pond. Here? These kids have had nannies and tutors since before they could string two words together. Suddenly I’m just an average sized fish in a bigger pond. And out there in that ‘real world’ everyone keeps harping about? Do you see how as the pond gets bigger, you get smaller? But you think I’m gonna let that slow me down? Play into that self-fulling prophecy that I won’t amount to shit because of where I grew up? No. I’m gonna keep my mouth shut, and work my ass off because that’s what got me out in the first place, and that’s what’s gonna keep me from backsliding.”

“Did you just call me a small fish?”

“I’m saying you better get your shit together, Gallagher. This ain’t fuckin’ t-ball, it’s the big leagues. Back home, we might be the big shots. But here? We ain’t shit unless we do something about it. And showing up late to class without a fuckin’ notebook and pen isn’t how you make that happen.”

“Fuck, alright. If I wanted a lecture, I’d just call Fiona.”

“Just trying to warn you. One hood kid to another. But by all means, you could also contemplate dropping out for the 7th time.”

“Anybody ever tell you that you need to fuckin’ relax?”

“If they think that, they’re not stupid enough to say it to my face.” She took a last drag from her cigarette, blowing the smoke up in Lip’s face, before dropping the butt on the ground and grinding it out with the toe of her boot.

“Oh, yeah cuz I bet you’re real tough,” he deadpanned with an eye roll, stomping out his own smoked up cigarette, and pulling open the door to the school’s coffee shop.

Y/N scoffed. “Start putting those pretty eyes of yours to good use Gallagher, and you might just realize that in addition to being smarter than you, I can also do anything else better than you. That includes being tougher. And partying harder.”

“Pretty eyes, hmm?”

Her eyes rolled, but the way her cheeks flushed didn’t go unnoticed either. “That would be the only thing you heard… Friday night. 8 o’ clock. And if you have to ask… well… guess you better put that brain of yours to work.” The smirk on her face could rival his any day as one of her hands patted affectionately at his chest. “Bye, Lip.” And with that, she walked backwards from him out of the coffee shop, leaving him wondering what the fuck had just happened, and more intrigued than he’d ever been by any girl before.

~~~

Lip understood what Y/N had meant about not needing to bother with an address for the party. All he had to do was follow the sounds of loud music and drunk laughter.

He could feel the music vibrating in his bones the second he stepped inside, the room dark with the exception of the strobe lights bouncing triadic colors all across the party-goers, one of which was Y/N.

“Hey!” Lip said when he got closer to her.

“Hey!” she greeted with a grin. “Looks like you figured it out. C’mon, let’s get you a drink.”

He followed her deeper into the house, into a brightly lit kitchen that had him squinting. “Pick your poison,” she said, tossing him a red cup.

“So, I still owe you that coffee,” he commented after a beat, while they made their drinks.

“Oh, do you now?” she asked, looking up at him over the rim of her cup.

“I mean… I don’t do well with debts.”

“Who said you were in my debt to begin with?”

“You helped me out when you didn’t have to. What would you call that?”

“I’d call it being nice.”

“Yeah, well you know as well as I do that being nice comes with a price tag attached where we’re from.”

“That may be so. But look around Lip. Sometimes people do things for others without there being a catch. And it was a fuckin’ notebook and pen, not bail money. I don’t need anything from you, because I don’t want anything from you. Crazy concept, I’m aware.”

He took a pause to take a long drink from his cup. “I don’t get you, you know that? Like you’re nice, but you’re such a fuckin’ bitch about it too.”

“The duality of woman,” she smirked, bowing dramatically. “Some people aren’t so easy to pin down, Lip. God forbid you might actually have to get to know them. Or let them get to know you. Which one scares you more, Lip?”

Again, as a chance to get his thoughts together, he took a drink. He decided to take a page from her book. “Bye Y/N,” he called out over his shoulder as he walked away.

She watched him go in proud amusement, knowing that she’d be seeing Lip sooner rather than later.

It took about an hour for Y/N to be proven right.

“So less say you n me get outta here,” the drunk nameless college boy slurred, one hand propping himself up against the wall, the other getting dangerously close to her face.

“Let’s not, and say we did,” she replied, grabbing his hand and dropping it to his side.

“Aw, but where’s the fun in that?” he crooned, breath smelling like cheap booze and shit weed.

“The fun is that you walk away with the only part of you bruised being your ego,” Lip growled from behind.

Frat boy turned to face Lip, his movements sluggish. “And who the fuck are you?”

“Nobody,” Y/N hissed at the same time Lip responded with “Her boyfriend.” “Nobody,” Y/N repeated in a firmer tone. “Lip, leave. I got this handled.”

“Yeah, leave,” the other boy said earnestly. “Probably be best if you didn’t watch me fuck your pretty little girlfriend.”

“Ugh, you’re disgusting,” she spat while the muscle in Lip’s jaw ticked. “You can follow Lip in getting the fuck out of my face.”

“Mmm, feisty. Good. Just the way I like ‘em.”

Y/N’s hand cracked against his face, and then Lip was shoving him backwards. “The fuck did you just say to her?! Get the fuck out of here!”

“Oh, yeah? And who’s gonna make me?”

A snarl ripped itself out of Lip’s throat, before he was throwing a punch, his fist connecting solidly with the other guy’s jaw. “Lip!” Y/N scolded in disbelief as Lip took the next hit square in the face. “Hey!” she yelled, wedging herself in between both young men, each prepared to keep exchanging blows. “Leave! Both of you!”

The drunk frat boy stumbled off, but not before throwing Lip the dirtiest look he could muster. Lip huffed in disdain, but stayed rooted in place. “You alright?” he checked, the lights bouncing off the room showing the area around his mouth already starting the transition from red to purple. With a thumb, he wiped at the trickle of blood spilling from his nose, smearing it with the blood coming from his busted lip.

With both hands, she shoved him as hard as she could. “I had that fuckin’ handled!”

“Well fuck me for being nice, then!” he shot back, matching her anger. He turned on his heel, away from her.

“Where the fuck are you going?!”

“Away! Like you wanted!”

She grabbed his arm, whipping him back around and dragging him to the nearest bathroom. “Sit!” she instructed, as she locked the door and grabbed a washcloth.

“I’m fine,” he protested, but sitting on the ledge of the tub anyway. “Nothing I haven’t dealt with before.”

She slammed one of her hands on the counter as she turned on the faucet to wet the washcloth. “See?” she said, cupping his face and cleaning away the blood. “It’s exactly that type of thickheaded stubbornness that’s gonna keep you stuck exactly where you are.”

“Thickheaded stubbornness?”

“Yes. That chip on your shoulder that says the world is always gonna be against you, and that everything comes with a price tag. That fighter’s instinct you disguise as reckless bravery, but is really just a stupid desire to hit the world as hard as it hits you. The world isn’t as black and white as you were made to believe. If this was some piss poor attempt at saying we’re even for giving you a fuckin’ notebook the other day, congrats. We’re even. Thank you. Are you satisfied now, Lip?” She chucked the washcloth in the sink.

“I’m never satisfied. And wasn’t it you who told me that sometimes people can do nice things for others just because? I wasn’t evening a score between us, Y/N. I was just being nice.”

“Well, way to be a bitch about it…” she snorted.

“Oh, you liked it,” he taunted, rising to his feet. “Didn’t you?”

She rolled her eyes in disgust. “No.”

“Aw, not so tough when it’s me confronting you with the truth now are you?”

“Fuck you, Lip.”

“Yeah, you’d like that wouldn’t you?” He closed the distance between them in one step, lifting her up onto the counter, his lips finding that niche where her neck met the collarbone. When her fingers flew to tangle in his hair, he took that as his cue that he wasn’t pushing limits that shouldn’t be pushed. But erring on the side of caution, he pulled back to peel his shirt off, giving her ample time to stop him. When he got a throaty whine of protest instead of her slapping him senseless, he chuckled darkly. “Aw, look who doesn’t want me to leave now.”

Y/N pulled her own shirt up and over her head, tossing it to join his on the tiled floor. She hooked a finger in his belt loop, pulling him back to her. “Fuck me, Lip,” she breathed before their lips collided, heat radiating in every touch.

~~~

Lip’s chest heaved as he tugged his jeans back on. “Here,” he said, digging out his phone and handing it over. “So next time we can cut right to the chase.”

She scoffed but started to put in her number anyway, a warning about how he better call on the tip of her tongue, but the screen changed as the name “Fiona” flashed and his phone started to ring. “Uh…” Y/N said slowly.

He swore under his breath, taking the phone back and answering. “Yeah, Fi? Whoa, slow down. Ian did what? Okay, we’ll keep him there. I’m on my way now. I dunno, Fi, as soon as I can. I’m coming from campus. But I’m coming. Just… sit tight or something.”

“What was that?” Y/N asked as Lip hung up the phone, pulling on the rest of his clothes in a hurry.

“Family emergency. D-do you have a car? Can I borrow it? It’s faster than taking the L.”

“Yeah,” she said, redressing with the same hurry and dangling her car keys. “C’mon, I’ll drive.”

“Oh, you don’t have to do that,” he rushed. “Come with me, I mean.”

“I’m coming with you whether you like it or not.”

Figuring that arguing with her would only only result in him leaving later, he nodded his head before letting them out of the bathroom.

The drive to his house was filled with tense silence as Lip bounced his leg and smoked the whole trip. As a quiet act of comforting the young man, Y/N rested a hand on his leg, and while he flinched at the contact, he allowed her hand to stay, the touch soothing even if it didn’t fully quit the storm raging in his head.

She hadn’t even put the car in park before Lip was bounding out, his boots racing against the pavement as he rushed towards the house. Y/N followed as quickly as she could, nearly colliding into his back as Lip froze in the small entryway of the house. “Where is he?” Lip barked, his brief hesitation breaking at the sight of his family huddled together in the middle of the living room while pounding and screaming sounded from upstairs.

“Up there,” a woman a couple years older than Lip directed, her voice cracking with fear and worry. “Mickey’s trying to break down the door to get to him. He’s been locked in there for like 2 hours, Lip. He stopped answering us. I- I-” Tears rolled down her cheeks as she pushed shaky hands through her hair. Behind her was a man and woman who looked to be even older than the woman talking, a teenage girl and boy of similar age, and a small toddler, all of them bearing the same terrified confusion.

Lip nodded once, understanding what the woman was saying without her needing to finish the thought. “Are all the knives accounted for?”

“Yeah, I think so. But… Fuck, Lip, I dunno what to do. Like I can’t just call the cops. I- I guess I could call Tony?”

“No, it’s fine, Fi,” Lip told her. “I’m gonna go help Mickey. You guys stay here. Actually, Kev, come with me. Carl, you too.”

As the men sprung into action and headed upstairs, the attention averted to Y/N who was still standing in the entryway. “Who are you?” the woman asked.

“Uh, I’m Y/N. I drove Lip. You must be Fiona?”

Fiona nodded numbly. “Yeah. This is V, Debbie, and Liam. Thanks for driving Lip. Uh…” She dug around in her pockets, pulling out a few crumpled bills. “Sorry,” she said, placing them in Y/N’s hand. “That’s all I got right now.”

“Oh, no,” Y/N responded, pushing the money back. “I- I go to school with Lip.”

Any chance for more small talk was interrupted by a loud splinting crack and an “Ian! What the fuck?!” before Lip, Kev, and Carl all came stomping downstairs, along with Mickey and Ian. “Y/N?” Mickey blinked, as he helped Ian onto the couch.

“Mickey,” Y/N deadpanned.

Mickey looked back and forth between Lip and his cousin, shaking his head. “Fuckin’ hell, Gallagher. You gonna fuck all my female relatives, or what?”

“Shut the fuck up, Mickey,” Lip and Y/N told him.

“Ian, are you okay?” Fiona asked, as Debbie went into the kitchen and came back with a glass of water.

“Yeah, I’m fine…” Ian muttered, gulping down the water, whatever that had transpired upstairs apparently long over in the red head’s mind.

Fiona’s gaze flickered over to the other boy’s for a more detailed answer. When Kev answered with a small whistle and twirl of his finger to indicate that Ian was off his rocker, V shoved him. “Kev!”

“What?” the man asked, holding up his hands in defense. “It’s true. Oh, and Fi… we’ll uh… fix the door tomorrow.”

“Don’t care,” Fiona responded, all her attention on Ian.

“I’m tired,” Ian declared.

“Okay, get some rest right here. I’m gonna talk to Lip real quick.” Her voice was soft, motherly even. A drastic change from the scared person she’d been 10 minutes ago.

“Okay. Hey, Lip. You home for the weekend?”

“Something like that,” Lip told him before following Fiona into the kitchen to talk out of earshot.

“What are you still doing here?” Mickey asked Y/N, not caring for the answer as he stalked after the eldest Gallagher siblings.

“Yeah, who are you?” Carl asked.

“She’s friends with Lip,” Debbie explained.

“Oh,” was the knowing reply.

V rolled her eyes. “Alright, Debbie, Carl, take Liam upstairs and go to bed. Kev, c’mon, let’s go home.”

There were some grumbles before the group dispersed, leaving Y/N alone with Ian. “So, you’re friends with Lip, huh? And related to Mickey somehow?”

“We’re cousins on his mom’s side. And I wouldn’t say Lip and I are friends, necessarily.”

“Mmm, right. Yeah, Lip doesn’t really do friends. Or relationships.”

“Good to know.”

“Hey, thanks again for driving Lip over,” Fiona’s voice sounded from behind as her and Mickey came back into the room. “We got it from here if you got somewhere to be.”

“Lover boy’s outside,” Mickey smirked.

“Not a problem. And thanks, jackass,” Y/N said, then headed in search of Lip, finding him on the back porch smoking yet another cigarette. “Hey,” she said softly, sitting down next to him.

“You’re still here?”

“Was I supposed to leave?”

He shrugged. “Everyone else does.”

“Ooo, dark…”

“Wasn’t saying it to seek sympathy points.”

“Does this tough act of yours ever get tiring?”

“Who said it was an act?”

“It’s not gonna kill you to let someone in, Lip.”

“Yeah, maybe. But it sure beats the hell out of watching them leave. Because in the end, they all do. I learned a long time ago that the only person I can count on is myself.”

“What a lonely way to live your life.”

“Better than the alternative.”

“Did you miss the part where I said I was tougher than you? That shit,” she said, jerking her thumb back at the house, “is a fuckin’ Tuesday. If anyone is gonna get the fucked up parts of you, it’s me, Lip.”

“Why?”

“Why do I get it?”

“No, why do you want to?”

“Because you get me back. Look, I know I’m abrasive. I know I piss people off. Because like you, if I push them away from the start, then when they eventually leave it hurts less. But here’s the stupid thing about that, Lip. It still hurts. Maybe this time it doesn’t have to.”

“You know that this is like a complete 180 from you berating me three days ago, right? Or even earlier this evening. Or right now.”

“That didn’t seem to bother you when you were fucking me in that bathroom.”

“How do I know you won’t leave?”

“How do I know you won’t?” she countered. “I’m not saying you gotta fuckin’ marry me, Lip. Just loosen up on the tough guy act. Not everything has to be a fight.”

“But what if I like fighting with you?”

“I’m sure we can find ways of making sure that still happens.”

“Wanna stay the night then? Maybe have a fight or two?”

Tag List

@frontmanash @goeatsomelife @flameraine @creator-appreciator @cxddlyash @1-irwin-94 @sparkling-calm @tea4sykes @youngblood199456 @5-seconds-of-obsession @gosh-im-short @aquarius-hood1996 @talkfastromance4 @itjustkindahappenedreally @philthepegacorn @ashtonlftv @miirandaaa @karajaynetoday @myfavfanficsever @stormrider505 @cashtonisruiningmylife @another-lonely-heart-blog @cullen-collective

#tough act #lip gallagher #lip gallagher fic #lip gallagher x reader #lip gallagher one shot #shameless #shameless fic #calpal irwin

229 notes · View notes

ghost-light · 3 years ago

Text

we rot, thinkin' lots about nothing

My contribution for Pride Day of @willieappreciationweek!!!

Summary:

Their gender- hm.

It was sort of like gender envy. Except remove the envy part. Because sure, ghosts could have gender. But it wasn’t really the gender he wanted. Stuck with it. Just like they were stuck in the afterlife, if you could call ghosthood an afterlife.

Read it under the cut or on ao3

To be fair, ghosts had never really needed a specific gender.

They still didn’t, at least not by any standards or official rules (spoiler alert; that’s because there were no definitive rules. The closest ones Willie had ever known to be rules were smashed to smithereens by Caleb Covington and Alex's band).

So when Julie asked if they wanted a pride flag or pin, it threw him off. When Julie showed them some pictures of pride flags for different gender identities, it threw them off. Hence the mini-spiral of skateboarding and maybe avoiding a certain band of ghosts and their lead singer.

It wasn’t hiding, per se. Willie Williamson Ortega didn’t hide. There was nothing to hide from, anyways. And yet, here he was, skating the day away, stuck in their own head with a problem that wouldn’t resolve itself.

He never had a label before. They were just a gay skater in the 80’s. He was just Willie, or William, to Caleb.

It didn’t feel quite right anymore.

The thing was, Willie's gender just was. They were a ghost. Couldn’t that be their gender?

(Agender, Flynn had suggested. Not having a particular gender. But that wasn’t quite right. He did have a gender. Probably.)

Willie tried explaining it to Alex, because he was a ghost too, right? Except… not quite in the sense that Willie was. Alex tried, he really did. But seeing the blonde’s encouraging but confused smile, and the way Alex’s eyebrows furrowed with intense concentration sank Willie’s spirits.

Flynn was a little more understanding. But they had found a label, was comfortable calling herself a demigirl lesbian. Demiboy and gay felt- close. Maybe. He hadn’t thought about these things so urgently before, hadn’t been able to find people that could truly get the situation. After seeing his look of distress, and the way their hands repeatedly combed through their hair, Flynn’s face softened. They put down their phone, still keeping a half-casual air. Adjusted their hat (where did Flynn get so many hats?).

“You know,” she paused. Exhaled slowly. “You know, gender is more like a concept. Like- my gender is basically a lesbian, yeah? It doesn’t make sense, but it makes sense to me. Some people call it a performance, but the point is that it shouldn’t define you. If you don’t find a label that you like, who cares, dude? If anyone gives you crap for it, hit them with your skateboard.”

The last line startled a laugh out of Willie, their shoulders relaxing ever so slightly. “I, uh, yeah. I’ll keep that in mind. You’re-you’re pretty great at this stuff.”

Flynn smirked, tilting their head to the side. “I know. Now go get ready for your,” she wiggled her eyebrows a bit, “date with blondie. And I am off to catch my demon of a girlfriend’s dance rehearsal.” Their eyes sparked at the word “girlfriend”, and Willie couldn’t help but grin back.

“Not a date!” he called out. “Not- it’s not a date. It’s just movie night with Alex. And Luke and Reggie and Julie. See? Not a date.” Willie was fumbling with their words, meaning he was probably blushing hard too.

“Mhmm.” Flynn looked bemused, shaking her head a little. “Have fun on your not-a-date-ghost-party-plus-my-best-friend then, skater boy.”

—

Okay, so Flynn had been helpful. That wouldn’t explain why Willie still felt lost, though considerably less so than before.

Their gender- hm.

So gender envy without the envy. And it was still unclear if “ghost” was a real-enough gender, or if Willie was making it all up. So that took away from the metaphor quite a bit. Gender envy, but without the envy. Oh, and scrap the gender too. Nice metaphor, Ortega. You’re really making progress here.

It’s ok. Everything’s fine. Willie isn’t the least bit concerned. He didn’t need a label, honestly. So why did they feel like they needed one so badly? Nobody was going to care, Julie certainly wouldn’t mind regardless of the answer she got. (If Willie was being honest, it wasn’t really about Julie.)

Didn’t Willie figure this out when they were alive? Skaters didn’t need a gender. Skating was what defined them, not a gender identity label or their sexuality. Skating was the one thing that made them feel free and alive. And then they died, of course. That didn’t mean they couldn’t still skate, though. And yes, maybe he couldn’t really feel the wind in their hair as he rushed down Hollywood Boulevard, and as much fun as phasing straight through lifers was, it did only emphasize the fact that he was a ghost. Not real.

If Willie themself wasn’t real, then why should their gender have to be real? It was barely a significant part of them, anyways.

In all seriousness, he did have an idea of why Julie’s simple question was affecting them so much. Nobody had ever asked them that before. For years, decades, Willie had simply. Been. Willie Williamson Ortega, ghost skater at the Hollywood Ghost Club.

It hadn’t occurred to him just how much they didn’t feel like a person during that time. Skating was wonderful, of course. Their only true escape from the strange hodge-podge of Caleb’s talent show. It was Caleb that was the problem, Caleb that had been leeching off Willie’s being the whole time.

And then, he was alive again. Willie, that was. Not Caleb. Alex brought Willie back to life, and wasn’t that just ironic? Because Willie was so, so alive in ways that they had never been before. And all while he was dead, to top it off.

And the craziest part about it was-

And then their board rammed into someone, sending both parties to the ground in a groaning heap.

“Ah damn, I am so sorry, I- Reggie??” This was great. Another one of the band members that they ran over with a skateboard. Alex was never going to let him live this down. At least they weren’t obsessing more over the board than the person. (Although, Willie had done a quick check of his board, which seemed unharmed.)

“Man, I just wanted to go for a walk, not get turned into roadkill,” Reggie laughed, sitting up cautiously.

“I’m so sorry dude, I wasn’t paying a whole lot of attention. Honestly, I was kinda having a minor afterlife crisis, as Alex would say.” He doesn’t know why he said that, doesn’t know what it is about Reggie that made them suddenly willing to stick around instead of apologize and skate off.

“Minor afterlife crisis, huh?” Reggie raised their eyebrows, hands propped up on his knees. “I mean, the afterlife is weird. Luke poofed my shirt away the first time we teleported! And Alex still gets wedgies, even though all our clothes are made of air!” Willie glanced at him, checking if he was serious or not. It was hard to tell, with Reggie’s earnest-puppy-dog confused face.

Willie inhaled deeply, sighing as they sat down. “Yeah. You know, I don’t think I’ve felt this alive, with Alex and you guys and Julie, since like, I died. And then Julie was asking about pride, and I can’t quite figure out what my gender identity is. It’s kinda…” His voice trailed off, unsure of what to say.

“Like you just are, but in a different way than everyone else.” Reggie murmured, eyes downcast.

Willie’s eyes snapped to Reggie. “Yeah! Exactly. You know that feeling? Because you just are, but nobody can understand that. I’m alive like I haven’t been in forever, and I can’t. Can’t put a name to myself anymore.”

Reggie nodded enthusiastically. “Luke keeps saying that maybe I’m like him. But I think he’s wrong. I used to wear skirts to our band performances. They were just fun to stomp and jump around on stage with. Nobody asks me, but if they did, I would say my gender’s like that. I’ll do it if it makes me feel good, but not because of labels.”

It was as simple as that. Willie took a breath, felt it sink into his bones and settle there. Simple. As. That. They’d been so busy worrying over finding a proper label. And truly, it wasn’t such a big deal.

Beside them, Reggie was still talking. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but we’re ghosts. We can pretty much do anything. Skating makes you feel more you, right? You say that a lot. Skateboarding, that’s enough to be an identity, gender or not. My sister used to say, when our parents would get mad at me for wearing skirts or makeup, that it didn’t matter. Because I would always be me, you know?”

“Yeah. Yeah. I’m always going to be me. Thank you, Reggie. I think you solved my minor afterlife crisis for me.” Skateboarding is a part of me. I can be a skater. I can be a ghost. I don’t need any other labels than that.

Except maybe Alex’s boyfriend. Or spouse. No! Stop thinking that much ahead, you haven’t even asked him out yet, Ortega! Focus on right now.

“Nah, it was all you. You knew it, you just needed to hear it again.” They grinned, green eyes sparkling in light of the setting sun. Willie huffed out a laugh, offering a fist. Reggie tapped his fist against Willie’s, not hesitating for a moment.

—

When Alex met Willie’s gaze, all he could see was happiness.

“Everything okay?” He asked, already knowing the answer that would come.

“Yeah. Reggie helped me figure some things out. And I’m still me. Just Willie.” They smiled, reaching out for Alex’s hand.

“Well, Just Willie, I hope you’re ready for Friday movie night. Luke picked A New Hope,” he leaned in and stage whispered, “for the seven hundredth time.”

Luke protested from across the couch, standing up to make his point.

“It’s a good movie, but we’ve all memorized the script at this point, Lucas.” Alex shot back, squeezing Willie’s hand slightly.

Willie leaned back, eyes fond as he took in the scene. Luke and Alex bickering loudly over who had the better movie choices, Julie laughing, exasperated as she bent over to paint Reggie’s nails a pale purple.

Definitely the most alive they had felt in a long time.

#willie appreciation week #willie wilbur williamson #willie jatp #jatp #julie and the phantoms #my writing stuffs

17 notes · View notes

zims-left-shoe · 4 years ago

Text

Agent Mothman (Dib x Male Reader)

Like most of my other fics, characters are aged up to high school. Plus, a friendly reminder that my request box is open!!

The silence was overwhelming. The pressure of everyone's collective held breath was almost palpable, your chest reactively tightening for no good reason. As you looked around you, eyes were wide, jaws were set and clenched in preparation to cringe. The only two who stuck out from the crowd were Zim and Dib, when did they not? Zim looked lost in thought, mind seemingly several thousand galaxies away, hands folded together neatly in front of his face, his chin resting on them. Dib, on the other hand, appeared to be over the whole ordeal. His posture was slouched as he stared ahead at the board through half-lidded eyes. As the quiet persisted, an anxious energy settled over your classmates (besides the two previously mentioned, of course). Eyes twitched, fingernails scraped the tables, feet began to tap restlessly on the floor.

"Y/n." The teacher finally spoke, bringing the whole class to sigh in relief, the building pressure suddenly released all at once. Many students leaned back in their chairs, high fiving each other. "Y/n, you will be partnered with Dib." You shrugged your shoulders as many looked to you in pity, some even whispering their sympathies. You had never aligned yourself with any group in particular throughout your school year. Granted, you were only a few months in, but you had switched schools so much you had learned to play the field. You avoided Dib considering his stigma, enabling you to be tolerated by the majority, however you were never mean to him. In fact, you rather liked him. You only chose to silently observe him rather than act upon your curiosity.

"But wait, who's going to be paired with Zim?" You heard a student groan, everyone's breath being held once more. You let your gaze drift over to your partner. He seemed relieved, a slight smile settling on his lips. This was probably the best case scenario for everyone. No one else had to work with Dib, and you were the only one who never picked on him for being just a bit different.

Once your teacher had finished reading names, you were all asked to sit with your partners. Without an ounce of reluctance, you sauntered over to Dib's otherwise empty table, taking one of the many available seats surrounding him. You needed to figure out a plan quickly, considering you only had one night to do the project. The project wasn't super taxing, in fact it seemed almost like busy work that would promote socialization at the same time, but it wasn't like your time frame was ideal.

"Dib, right?" You held up your hand in a slight wave. "I don't think I've officially introduced myself. I'm Y/n."

"I know. The new kid who has no real friends yet is somehow still deemed acceptable by the popular kids? An anomaly for sure." Red painted his face, his eyes widening as he realized how his words may have came off as. "Shit, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to sound rude. Or creepy. You know what? I'll just stop talking." An awkward chuckle escaped your lips as his eyes fell to his sneakers. After a slight pause, Dib spoke again, his tone much more reserved than before. "I can just do the whole project and you can put your name on it if you want. It's not that hard." He was giving you an out, not wanting to piss you off. Reaching an arm out, you slugged his shoulder lightly.

"Nah, come on. I don't roll that way. Besides, I want to hang out with you a little."

"You...want to hang out...with me?" Dib pointed a finger to himself, eyes wide behind his large glasses. An incredulous expression was etched into every single feature of his face, as if he couldn't believe those words left your mouth.

"Yeah." After that syllable, the bell rang, dismissing you from school. You stood up, gathering your things. "Anyway, I'll be at your place after dinner. Just text me your address or whatever." You quickly scribbled your digits down on a scrap piece of paper that was laying around, passing it to him. "See ya!" You dashed away, sneaking one last glance back to see Dib still sitting in his chair, as still as a statue, not believing that this was even happening.

Your stomach felt as if it was full of butterflies, and you couldn't shake the grin that had spread across your face as you began your walk home.

God...he was even cuter than I thought... You were embarrassed by your own thoughts, pinching yourself on the arm. Truth was, you may or may not have been stalking him a little. He lived in your neighborhood, and you just couldn't help it. You had always been a hopeless romantic of sorts, and all it took was one look at him in class giving a presentation on the gremlin in his backyard and you were in love. You didn't even need his address, you knew where he lived, but you didn't want to make him feel uncomfortable, so you asked for it anyway. Plus, it was a way to sneak him your number. And it wasn't as if you were actively trying to find out where he lived. It was pretty much impossible to ignore him and Zim screaming at each other as they ran back and forth between their houses all day.

"This is going to be a long night." You sighed out, foot striking out to kick a rock, the satisfying skittering sounds it made calming your nerves a small amount.

You drew in a deep breath as you brought your fist to the door, rapping on it a few times. Rocking back on your heels, you clutched your notebook and other supplies tightly to your chest, internally cringing at yourself. Everyone at school thought you were incredibly cool, but on the inside, you were just a lovesick gay who was overflowing with big dumb energy. The door swung open, bringing you to jump and be pulled from your motivational speech that was being given inside your head.

"Come on in. I'm surprised you showed up." Dib stepped aside to let you in, gesturing past the living room to the kitchen where a purple-haired girl sat at a table, picking at the remaining food on her plate. A floating monitor hovered near the table as well. "We're just finishing dinner, but you can follow me if you want." Nodding, you padded behind the social outcast wordlessly, taking a seat next to him at the table. "Gaz, this is Y/n, my partner for my project. Y/n, this is my sister Gaz."

"Hey." You waved to the girl. Her expression remained squinty as she continued to pick at her food, eyes dancing between her plate and a Game Slave which was charging on the counter.

"Whatever." She grumbled, never even directly acknowledging your existence once. You began to wonder if Dib was actually the most normal out of his entire family, which was saying something. Dib awkwardly cleared his throat as he pointed to the floating monitor, which displayed a man in a lab coat and goggles furiously working on something.

"Oh, and this is my dad. He's at work right now, like usual. When he can't be with us for dinner, he either videocalls us from his lab or plays a pre-recorded video reminding us of chores and dinner instructions." Despite how sad the things he had just said sounded, not an ounce of bitterness was up for display on his face. Instead, his eyes shone with pride, happy to have a dad who was making a difference in the world, even if he could never really be a conventional father. "Anyway, just let me clean up and then we can get to work." Dib stood up, bringing his own plate over to the sink and running it under water, placing it in in its respective place in the dishwasher afterwards. Waving for you to follow him, he led you down the hall to a room that was clearly his. The door was covered in posters and stickers of aliens and other supernatural creatures, a good sized "Keep Out" sign the centerpiece. You wondered what would be inside, becoming excited. You figured you were the first person besides his own family to be seeing his room. He twisted the knob, casually pushing the door open, allowing you to step inside.

"Wow..." You trailed off as you glanced around. There was so much to look at. Your eyes darted from one thing to the next, barely able to take it all in. There were several computer monitors surrounding a desk that was littered in papers and catalogues for supernatural hunting items, a few prototypes of possibly his dad's inventions scattered there as well. His room was lined with posters of aliens and other entities, an important looking briefcase thrown haphazardly onto his bed. The one thing that held your gaze the longest was a ginormous cork board. Several photos, drawings, diagrams, and hurried scribbles of notes were tacked up there, filling it to the max. Each paper was connected with color coded strings, things circled in colored pen seemingly at random, although you knew better. It was the definition of organized chaos. In large, bold, red letters, one word was scrawled on a paper at the top of the board: ZIM.

"I'm sorry, I tried to clean it as best I could. It's still kind of a mess." Dib hurriedly stacked papers together on his desk, trying to make it look presentable.

"It's fine, don't worry about it. You should see my room. Half of my shit isn't even out of boxes yet, and we moved in months ago." You laughed, sitting down on his floor. "So, alien invasion, huh? Isn't Zim that kid with the skin condition?" You asked, gesturing to his cork board. His shoulders tensed as he unplugged his computer and brought it down to the ground, taking a seat beside you.

"Could we just get to work? Please?" He seemed to want to sweep that subject under the rug, and you decided that you would let him.

"Okay...so anyway, this research poster. You got a topic in mind?" Your prompt drew him out of his unsociable shell, albeit hesitantly.

"Personally, I was thinking Area 51, but if you wanted to do something else..." He genuinely appeared to not want to upset you, despite usually not caring about how he came off to others.

"That sounds great, Dib. Interesting too. You think they're really hiding aliens there?" Laying down on your stomach, you rested your face in the palms of your hands, gearing up for a long talk. A smile crept onto your face as immediately his eyes lit up.

"I'm glad you asked."

"I think we have the essentials. Now we just need to get them onto the poster, which is probably the most time consuming part." Dib stretched his arms towards the ceiling while you yawned and cracked your back. You didn't know how long you had been sitting on the floor for, but a glance to the clock by his bed told you it was 8:01 pm. The two of you had spent the last couple of hours researching, organizing notes, and mainly just talking about yourselves. You had no idea why everyone constantly was ragging on him. You found him to be incredibly interesting and entertaining, hanging onto every single word he spoke. You weren't really sure if you believed in all of these supernatural creatures, but you also didn't think that they couldn't exist.

"I think so too. You ready to start on the poster now?" Reaching out, you gathered the posterboard and construction paper Dib had brought in from his garage together.

"Yeah, in a minute. I have to use the bathroom and then see what Gaz is up to, I'll be back in a few." You hummed a response, Dib standing up and exiting, closing the door softly behind him. Deciding to take a closer look at the Zim conspiracy board, you pushed yourself to your feet, leaning close to try and decipher the grainy images. One in particular caught your eye. It wasn't in color, and everything seemed fairly blurry. Zim, or what was supposedly Zim, was hunched over something that looked to be a robot. Except, as you looked even closer, Zim seemed to have these buggish eyes and long, skinny antennae in place of his hair. Rubbing your eyes, you flopped down onto Dib's bed.

"God, I must be seeing things." You had managed to convince yourself that you had been staring at computer screens and papers for far too long, and that your eyes were playing tricks on you, showing you what Dib wanted you to see. Closing your eyes for a minute, the rise and fall of your chest turned slow and steady, and you could feel your grip on reality loosening.

A ringtone of sorts snapped you back from your almost-doze, and at first you thought it was your phone, but after waking up a bit more, you realized it was coming from one of Dib's monitors. It appeared he was getting a call. The monitor showed nothing besides a logo of some sort of eye, as well as an option to accept the call or decline. Filled with curiosity, your feet took you to his desk where his monitor sat. You barely felt in control of your body as your finger swiped at the screen in the direction to accept the call.

"Agent Mothman-" The voice coming through the monitor was distorted, but you got the impression that it was on purpose. The image displayed was a dark silhouette of what seemed to be a man. "You're not Mothman."

"You mean that cryptid from West Virginia? No. I'm not." You took a seat in Dib's desk chair, which was very comfy. You assumed he spent a lot of time in it when he wasn't hanging out with Zim.

"Who are you and what do you know?" The voice was menacing, and you vaguely wondered if Dib was involved in something more serious than you thought. Quirking an eyebrow, you tried to not let any miniscule amount of fear you were feeling show.

"I'm, we'll just say Agent, uh...Nessie." Feeling uncreative, your mind drifted to the Loch Ness Monster.

"You're not Nessie either."

"You got one of those too? Ugh, fine. What about Agent Chupacabra?"

"Well, no, but...you're not any agent we know of."

"But I could be! Agent Chupacabra reporting for duty!" You brought your hand up to your head stiffly in a mock salute.

"But you're not a member of the Swollen Eyeball! What are you doing on Mothman's computer?"

"The Swollen what now?" You were smiling stupidly, only because you couldn't really grasp what the current situation was.

"Hey, sorry, Gaz decided to hound me over drinking the last soda, so I took a little longer than I thought-" Dib opened the door to reveal you sitting in his desk chair, trying to look all spooky for the guy in the monitor. You thought he'd laugh at your stupidity, but he was not in the least bit amused. "OH MY GOD AGENT DARK BOOTY!" Slamming his room door, he darted over to where you were sitting, almost tripping and falling on his face. He made a strangled noise as he noticed the disappointed expression that rested on the silhouette's face.

"Who is your little friend, Agent Mothman?" The distorted voice was cold, and you could feel Dib almost shrink next to you.

"Listen, I can explain-"

"I thought we stressed secrecy, and the fact that you are not allowed to have outsiders sit in on our important meetings."

"Meeting?" All of a sudden, several of the other monitors sparked to life, various other silhouettes coming into view. Just in one glance, you could see that Dib wanted nothing more than to fade away into a cloud of space dust in that moment. You stayed silent, knowing that Dib was in some serious trouble because of you.

"We had a meeting at 8:30 pm sharp, Mothman. You knew this. And you had a friend over?" Dib's face, already pale, turned even more so. Any lighter, and you thought for sure he'd become a ghost on the spot.

"I am so sorry, I had a school project, and he's my partner, I lost track of time." He looked absolutely helpless, and without a word, you stood up and gathered the poster supplies. Snapping back to his senses, he turned to you and began shoving you out of his room and herding you to the front door.

"Dib, I-"

"You really need to go!" There were no other words said between the two of you as he quite literally slammed the door in your face. A sigh slipped past your lips as you clutched your project items in your arms, dragging your feet across the pavement on your walk home. You lazily stumbled through your front door, mumbling a greeting to your parent(s) as you headed to your room, gearing yourself up to finish the project before morning.

"Thank you to Y/n and Dib for their, erm, informative...presentation on Area 51. That was your last one, so enjoy your last five or so minutes of class." Your teacher went back to their desk as you and Dib retreated to your own table. You hadn't talked much since the incident last night, and quite frankly, you were tired from spending hours of your night creating the visual portion of your project. Dib's lips were tightly pressed together in a thin line, and you guessed there was something he wanted to get off his chest.

"Look, Dib. If there's something you want to say to me, just do it. I'm sorry for answering your call, that was not a good move on my part, and I also apologize for getting you in trouble with your, uh...society." Running a hand through his dark hair, Dib shook his head.

"No, that was my bad. I forgot I had a meeting. I'm also really sorry for kicking you out and then forcing you to finish the project on your own." Your expression softened, unable to resist forgiving him.

"Yeah, that was kind of a dick move." You elbowed him jokingly, hoping he would loosen up now that bygones were bygones.

"No, seriously. How can I make it up to you?" He looked as if he wouldn't be taking no for an answer. He had gotten a taste of what having someone who genuinely enjoyed being around him was like, and he wasn't willing to let that go. A sly grin tugged at your lips, and almost immediately an idea came to mind.

"Consider yourself forgiven if you take me ghost hunting, or whatever it is you do." His shoulders tensed, but relaxed when he realized you weren't making fun of him.

"Well, you're in luck. I just received a case file investigation last night on a bigfoot lead. I'll pick you up at eight, if that works?" His words were cautious, almost as if he still believed you were phishing.

"It's a date!" You cheered happily, already excited about getting to spend more time with him. A faint blush dusted his cheeks at your wordage.

"Of-Of course." He stammered out, grateful for the bell that rang not even a second after.

"See you tonight, Dib!" You waved as you made your way home, wanting eight to come as fast as possible.

"He knows the project is over, right?" Torque Smacky raised an eyebrow, questioning Dib and wondering why someone as cool as you would be hanging around with a guy like Dib by choice.

The doorbell rang, and you sprang up from where you sat on the couch, overjoyed to head out. Practically throwing open the door revealed Dib in all of his trench coat glory, albeit a bit nervous looking and sweaty.

"Alright Mr. Mothman, where are we going?" You grabbed onto his arm, eventually linking it with your own. He cringed at the nickname, but resisted nothing else.

"To the park. Apparently, some woman saw bigfoot there the other night. Also, fun fact, I saw bigfoot in my garage one time. He was using the belt sander." Your eyes widened, and you immediately realized why everyone called him crazy. You took it upon yourself to believe him. He obviously believed in himself, so why shouldn't you?

"Interesting. You see any other spooks in your time here?" He shrugged as you walked.

"I mean, I think a few ghosts and, well, aliens of course, but we've been over that. Also, I have vague memories of being abducted by aliens as a kid. I think they were trying to experiment on me to create some sort of genius super baby or something." You couldn't help the laughter that tumbled from your mouth. It wasn't necessarily laughing at him, more so that you weren't sure how else to respond. You didn't want to put him down, but at the same time, his story was very out there. And although you weren't 100% on board with the whole supernatural thing, you believed in him and his words. If that was his truth, you would stand by it. "You ever see anything supernatural?" You pointed a finger to yourself, as if to ask, 'me?'.

"Well, I mean...I did live in West Virginia for a while when I was younger...a lot younger. And then we moved around a lot." Your eyes instinctively narrowed as you tried to recall those times with you and your neighborhood friends. "And, you know, Mothman was like the local legend. He's basically a celebrity down there."

"No way! Did you actually, like, see him?" If you didn't already have it, you sure had his full attention now.

"No. I believed in him for a while, but we never saw him, and as I got older and distanced myself from there, I just kind of figured it was bullshit. My friends and I, we would go out at night trying to hunt for him with flashlights and stuff. Sometimes we'd bring lamps onto the porch and plug them in, building little 'Welcome, Mothman' forts to sleep in." You chuckled, remembering how much you had believed in all the spookies and specters as a child.

"That's adorable." Dib's lips were parted in a smile as he continued to lead you deeper into the park. You weren't sure when you had actually gotten there, but you weren't really paying much attention.

"Well, maybe we could do that together some time. I know Mothman isn't really big in this part of the country, but who knows. Maybe he'll come." Softly bumping Dib in the side, you were pleased to see his smile only grow.

"I'd like that." The nice moment was interrupted by rustling of the trees, and Dib turned on his flashlight, pointing it to the treetops. "There!"

"I thought bigfoot was more on the ground!" You called as you raced after him. You both came to a grinding halt, your feet skidding in the grass to try and avoid ramming straight into Dib's back. The boy you were with aggressively pointed his flashlight into the tree, resulting in a loud hiss from whatever was up there. "Maybe it's just a cat, Dib!" You tried to pull him away, not really liking how riled up he was at the moment.

"Zim! What are you doing here?! What evil things are you planning?"

"Zim?" You looked upwards, following the beam of the flashlight. Sure enough, there was a green body hunched in a tree branch, a robot of some sort next to him.

"None of your business, Dib-stink!" Zim spat, turning to face your friend. It was then you got a good look at his face. It wasn't the slightly abnormal one you were used to seeing every day. His eyes were red and buglike, sleek, black antennae sprouting from his head.

"Holy shit, Dib. You're not crazy." You flicked your flashlight on as well, aiming it at who you thought was your classmate. "He really is an alien!" A strangled cry came from the alien sitting atop the tree branch.

"GIR! Do something!"

"Yes, master!" The once cheerful-looking robot suddenly turned much more serious, dropping down from the branch to where the two of you were standing. You yelped, unsure of what this thing was capable of.

"Relax, his robot is pretty much usele-" Dib began, but his sentence came to an abrupt end when several missals and other weapons emerged from his head.

"How do you like GIR's new adjustments, Dib? I finally got his behavioral chip fixed to where he's responsive, but not too serious." Zim smirked, and with the point of one of his clawed fingers, his robot was on the two of you.

Simultaneously, both of you let out a scream, reaching desperately for each other's hands as you ran for your lives back to Dib's place. Your feet pounded the pavement, lungs feeling as if someone was raking knives down your throat and organs, yet despite all that, you both refused to look back. Only when you were on his porch did you feel comfortable sneaking a glace behind you, only to find an empty street lit up by streetlights. Breathing heavily, the two of you leaned on each other for support. Dib looked very worse for wear. He didn't seem to be too athletically inclined.

"I think...we lost him..." You spoke between gasps for air, grinning all the while. He nodded vigorously, still wheezing. After the two of you had regained your breath, you both managed to catch each other's gaze. You felt every portion of your brain that was in charge of thinking shut down as you leaned in closer to him. You were barely even aware of what you were doing as you pressed your lips to his. His eyes looked as if they were about to burst from his skull, but after a moment, they eased shut as he relaxed into the kiss. You pulled away, feeling heat rush to your cheeks, almost as if your face was on fire. Your stomach was tied in too many knots to even look at Dib, but if you had, you would have seen that he wasn't fairing much better. In fact, he was probably in worse condition. "Thanks for the night of fun, Agent Mothman."

"Uh-huh." He mumbled out, and his brain looked miles away. You decided just to go home before you did or said anything else that could be classified as stupid. As you power-walked away, Dib's hand found its way to his lips, where the feeling and warmth of your own still lingered.

#invader zim #fanfic #fanfiction #dib membrane #dib x reader #invader zim x reader #invader zim fic #invader zim fanfiction #oneshot #one shot #invader zim oneshot #invader zim one shot

82 notes · View notes

lattelesbean003 · 5 years ago

Note

1-50 for the asks lmao (if you feel like it, but you don’t have to lskdjfls)

1. What’s your sexual orientation?

I’m lesbian! 🏳️‍🌈

2. What are you obsessed with right now?

Uhh, I’m really into Haikyuu!! again. I’m still kinda obsessed with Marvel though lol.

3. Ever done any drugs?

Only prescribed drugs.

4. What piercings do you want?

Ohh, so many. I want three piercing on the lobes of both my ears and a couple cartridge piercings. I’ve kinda thought about a nose ring? But I’m not sure. As a start though I need to get over my fear of needles and actually get my ears pierced.

5. How many people have you kissed?

None.

6. Describe your dream home.

Okay okay. I want a one or two bedroom apartment in Montreal, Quebec. (NYC would be the dream but hahahhhh way too expensive). The kitchen would have dark cabinets with a white counter top, a nice deep sink with a movable faucet, obviously a dishwash and stove, a pretty big stainless steel fridge, a stainless steel microwave, and a toaster. I’d have a nice, big, comfy couch in the living room. There’d be lots of plants (I love plants), and a little table by a window for a ‘dining’ room. Bedroom would be big enough to fit a double or queen bed. Oh! I’d also have bookcases everywhere cause I love books and manga lol.

7. Who are you jealous of?

There are a few fanfic writers that I’m jealous of just cause they’re really good at writing and my dumbass feels inferior and bad about myself. It’s one of the things I hate about myself. I get insecure wayyy too easily.

8. What’s your favorite show to binge?

Right now, Haikyuu!!. I binged it pretty quickly and it’s turning into a comfort show for me lol.

9. Do you watch porn?

I have before, but it makes me uncomfortable.

10. Do you have a secret sideblog?

I do have a blog that I run that I haven’t told anyone about.

11. If you could teleport anywhere in the world right now, where would you go?

Florence, Italy. I wanna go back so baddd.

12. What’s one of your fantasies?

Living a good and happy life and not feeling insecure about literally everything

13. Do you have/would you get your nipples pierced?

No I wouldn’t. Exposing my chest to anyone makes me very uncomfortable. Also, the idea of nipple piercings is very bizarre to me but hey, you do you boo.

14. How would you spend a million dollars?

I would buy way too many books and clothes lmao. Also food. If I didn’t set aside some of it for college, I’d spend it on dumb stuff like that.

15. Are you in a relationship?

No, but I wish. I’d love a girlfriend.

16. Do you follow porn blogs?

Nope!

17. Are you angry with anyone right now?

I’m not angry with anyone, just feeling insecure about my relationship with a couple people cause my brain is stupid.

18. What tattoos do you want?

I want a full sleeve tattoo! Idk what the art would be, mostly because I haven’t actually thought about it toooo much because tattoos involve needles and pain and those are two of my biggest fears. (Failure takes the number one spot though.)

19. If you could change your name, would you? What would you change it to?

Oh uh, idk man. I’ve never thought about it. I’d just stick with Jen.

20. What is something you’re obsessed with?

For fandoms, Haikyuu!! right now, but I love sweet things way too much. Also, bread.

21. Describe your best friend.

Tall, adventurous, takes no shit, smart

22. Tag someone you think is hot.

@ms-bookdragon ;)

23. Who are five of your favorite bands/musical artists?

I mostly like specific songs, rather than one artist. Here are my top five at the moment:

Piano Man / Billy Joel

My Love Will Never Die / AG, Claire Wyndham

Toss a Coin to Your Witcher / Samual Kim, Black Gryphon (I like the remix more than the original)

Dance Monkey / Tones and I

The Sound of Silence / Disturbed

24. What are three places you want to travel?

I really want to go to Quebec (and I might be able to this summer!!), Japan, and Greece. (I also wanna return to Italy).

25. Describe your perfect Friday night.

Sharing lots of laughs with friends.

26. What’s your favorite season?

Spring! I don’t mind winter if it snows, but where I live it mostly rains and it’s annoying lol. We’ve only had like, four dry days since the new year.

27. What’s your pet peeve?

LOUD CHEWING OMG I CAN’T STAND IT. Also when anything scraps against metal. Makes me cringe and tense up like nothing else.

28. Who is the funniest person you know?

A gay guy in my chem class. Also my neighbor. They both have very weird senses of humor but I appreciate them lol.

29. What’s the most overrated movie?

Avengers: Endgame. :3 (I will forever hate that movie lol.)

30. Tag someone you want to talk to but have been too shy to message.

Oh god why you gotta do this to me. @voxofthevoid. Ahh he only knows me from my main not my sideblog. 😭

31. Do you like paper books or ebooks better?

Paper books don’t hurt my eyes as much. I don’t think I could read a paper version of a fanfic though.

32. If you could live in a fictional world, what world would you pick?

Oh oof, uhh none of them? They’re all kinda shitty worlds lol.

33. If money was no object, what would your wardrobe be like?

Lots of button-ups and sweaters. Jeans, converse, scarves, nice dresses and skirts. I don’t have a specific wardrobe, I mostly buy whatever catches my eye.

34. What’s your coffee order?

Depends on my mood, but I mostly buy ice caps at Tim Hortons. Sometimes a french vanilla. At proper coffee shops, I buy a latte or mocha. I can’t handle a normal latte yet though, so it’s normally a caramel latte or something. At Starbucks, I typically buy a caramel frappuccino. When it’s cold, a mocha latte. (The peppermint mocha is yummy.)

35. Do you have a crush on anyone?

Nope, kinda wish I did though.

36. Do you still have feelings for any of your exes?

Nope! I have on ex and mostly avoid him lol.

37. Have any tattoos?

No, but as I mentioned above I’d love a full sleeve tattoo.

38. Do you drink?

Nah, I’m still underage, alcohol is gross, and I’m not popular enough to be invited to parties.

39. Are you a virgin?

Yis. Still haven’t gotten my first kiss too.

40. Do you have a crush on any of your mutuals?

41. How many followers do you have?

On this account, tumblr claims 39, but it’s actually 24 lmao. I have a joint account with another person that has over 1000 followers though.

42. Describe the hottest person you know.

She has a long mousy brown hair, a bunch of ear piercings, really adorable dimples, and a very nice smile. I’m like 99% she’s straight though.

43. What’s your guilty pleasure?

I indulge too much in junk food.

44. Do you read erotica?

Yupp. I mean, if you count fanfic with sex in them plus the occasional doujinshi.

45. What’s the worst date you’ve ever been on?

The one date I’ve been on wasn’t too bad, but the dude I went out with thought we were a couple after the one date. I feel kinda bad because I led him on for two weeks, unsure how to break it to him that I discovered I was gay soooo.

46. How many people do you follow?

100, but like over half of them aren’t very active.

47. If you could marry any celebrity, who would you pick?

Hmmmmmmm. I don’t have a specific crush on anyone, but maybe Sebastian Stan just cause I wanna be his friend. He’s too old though lol.

48. Describe your ideal partner.

A girl (obviously), who’s could drag me to social events, but also enjoy a quiet night at home. Funny, encouraging/supportive, kind. Also lots of cuddles. I love cuddling and hand holding, plus cheek kisses!! Ahhh

49. Who do you text the most?

Two of my irl friends. They’re both great. I also text the person I have a joint blog with.

50. What’s your favorite kind of weather?

A warm spring day. The sun isn’t too hot, the grass is a lush green, and there’s only a handful of clouds in the sky. On the flip side, if I don’t have to go to school, I love snow. Walking around my neighborhood when it’s totally quiet and peaceful is one of my favorite things to do.

#asks #evelyn (eve)

5 notes · View notes

punkscowardschampions · 5 years ago

Text

Janis & Jimmy

Janis: [so like evening like probably not expecting this] Janis: what you up to tonight Jimmy: What are you about to ask me to do? Janis: Sadly, nothing that exciting Janis: but I need out of this house so if you've got something going on, we can make some #content Jimmy: Find a party and I'll meet you there Janis: Okay Janis: it's been dry so far but not everyone can have decided to be boring all at once Jimmy: have you moved to a new town without telling me? Jimmy: bit rude to make me fake ldr Janis: God, I wish Janis: I need to be several towns over with the noise that being made in this gaff rn Jimmy: They're there and you didn't invite me? That's more than a bit rude, mate 💔 Janis: Oh yeah Janis: sleepover fetish is so real 🤤😍 Jimmy: You know how I feel about you in PJs Jimmy: how dare you Janis: I know you're just gutted you didn't get a chance to see 💀👑 in hers Janis: 💔💔 hurts Jimmy: [brings back the # he started about her only wearing pjs cos I skim re-read that convo post school trip yesterday] Janis: Fine, come over Janis: if you love a throwback that hard Janis: we won't be sharing a room with them though Jimmy: I'd 💕 some enthusiasm Janis: You can have all the snacks they won't eat Jimmy: Has my true love cleared that? Janis: You have to save her from herself Janis: they do it on purpose, it's a binge waiting to happen Jimmy: hot Janis: If you've got a saviour complex Janis: put on your cape, crown of thorns, whatever suits Jimmy: If you've got a short enough memory to forget me saving you from a life threatening injury and nursing you back from the brink Jimmy: suited you then Janis: I remember, if less dramatically and in your favour Janis: but I never said it didn't suit Jimmy: know my audience and how they remember it Jimmy: Give me your address then, Juliet Janis: Hmm, Grace would say you owe her damages, probably Janis: [does, lol soz] Jimmy: she knows where I am if she wants to claim Jimmy: I'll have 'em off you though for taking the piss Janis: Only my parents doing that Janis: I'll pay for an uber if you can cope with the flex Janis: desperate times, like Jimmy: shut up Janis: bit rude Jimmy: bit rude is sending me into the middle of nowt to get 💀🔪🔪 Janis: You can trust me Jimmy: Piss off Janis: 🙂🙂🙂🙂 Jimmy: Stop messing about, rich girl Janis: I ain't, look on street view or some shit, it's a big hippie farmhouse Jimmy: [does so a pause] Jimmy: 🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯 Janis: I'll get you an uber now, yeah? Janis: before they 💀🔪🔪 me in some sleepover satanic ritual Jimmy: I can't have them fucking with our pact Janis: my hero 💘 Jimmy: there's your first caption sorted Janis: I'll think of something as mushy for you in the meantime Jimmy: do you need owt other than a ✞? I'm at the shop Janis: 🤔 Janis: get a like meal for two I can pretend I cooked Jimmy: 👍 Janis: I assume you've got 🚬s Jimmy: I'll grab drinks though Janis: can do Janis: we have some shit here too though Jimmy: What's #goals when you're not drinking a flat white? Janis: if it's pink and alcoholic Jimmy: [sends her pics of different drinks like rose wine or pink gin or whatever else like ?] Janis: Better go gin Janis: it is an emergency Jimmy: [when that's got mum energy so you're lowkey triggered and don't reply] Janis: [when you think it's 'cos it was too pricey or something so you're like oh no faux pas] Janis: the rose would be fine too, I'm not fussy, as you know by now Jimmy: [thinking about Harry too now but sends a selfie from the uber with the gin secured like everything's fine] Janis: 😍 Janis: should I socials that? Jimmy: Why not? Janis: idk how vain you're feeling Janis: maybe you wanna fix your hair Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt baby Jimmy: if I weren't I wouldn't be coming to mess up yours Janis: 😏 Janis: [does post it, with all that enthusiasm about him coming that is so fake uhuh] Jimmy: [a cute little back and forth in the comments while he's on route] Janis: [one of them clearly has liked it so now they know they know] Janis: There we go, committed now Jimmy: [love that though cos it gives them an excuse to go harder with it which he would and is] Jimmy: Is that a record or what? Janis: wait 'til you see their creepy faces fogging up the glass Jimmy: 😱😱😱 Jimmy: no horror films needed Janis: got the setting Janis: even if I 🤞 I'm here, like Jimmy: Promise you'll protect me Janis: 💪 babe Janis: you're safe with me Jimmy: Say it then Janis: What? Jimmy: 🤞 Janis: Oh Janis: I promise I'll protect you from 💀👑 and her underlings Janis: salt circles all ready, like Jimmy: 💪🏆🥇 you Janis: you're feeling generous Janis: have you opened that pink gin without me Jimmy: you ain't feeling any trust towards me Jimmy: 💔🎻🎻💔 Janis: I'm trusting you with my life rn Janis: you've got to fend off the pillows in the night Jimmy: hot Janis: glad you think so Jimmy: oi, be glad you know it Jimmy: that's a #kinkunlocked Janis: Add it to my collection Janis: 🎟🎟🎟🎟 what do I win when I get enough? Jimmy: What do you want? Janis: fuck a 🧸 obvs Jimmy: If that's what you're getting me to this sleepover for, steady on Jimmy: he can buy me a drink first instead of making me bring my own Janis: 😂😂😂 Janis: stop Janis: his plans are set and he is gutted Janis: 🚫 sneaking out Jimmy: me an' all, put in loads of groundwork on that trip Jimmy: treating him mean and all that bollocks Janis: 💔🎻🎻💔 Janis: when it was all a cunning ruse to see Mr. Bear again Jimmy: It's my turn to cheat, Joanne Janis: you'll have to take your free pass to the bathroom 'cos we can't not share a room Janis: and I don't need to witness that tah Jimmy: It's alright, I won't kiss him on the mouth Janis: she probably practices on him Janis: it'll be sticky Jimmy: 🤢🤢🤢 Jimmy: I said I never opened the gin not that I ain't drank nowt Janis: such a lightweight Jimmy: Leave it out, pisshead Jimmy: I didn't know you were gonna 🍑📞 Janis: Do you feel cheap? Janis: 'cos that ride ain't, so don't worry boo 😘 Jimmy: I ain't been in an uber before, how could I not feel 🤑🤑 Janis: 🤞 you get here unmurdered and unmolested Janis: driver gonna ruin my night, like Jimmy: Oi Jimmy: that might make my night 💕👴 Janis: obviously, I am here to ruin your night Janis: 🍑📞 shoulda let you know Janis: were you out? Jimmy: With who, my other fake girlfriend? Janis: I can be that jealous Janis: they'd pretend they didn't love that but they so would Jimmy: I'd drink to it Janis: [a picture of 🧸 in the washing machine like 'bout to drown a bitch for you] Jimmy: 😍😍😍 Jimmy: sod nudes, get you a girl who sends 💀💀💀 threats she's about to follow through on Janis: you're so welcome Janis: he'll be date ready and so will you 🍆💦💦 Jimmy: Depends if they've set a trap on the front door Janis: There's no way they'll be ready for gentlemen callers that soon Janis: you could be travelling from the fucking moon and they'd still be hiding Jimmy: Asia's always ready for me, babe Jimmy: The tall one an' all Janis: you're disgusting Jimmy: soz that you thought you were my only starcrossed lover Janis: Of course not Janis: just the idea of those two doing anything beyond 😭 makes me wanna 💀💀💀 obvs Jimmy: I might 🤢🤢🤢 which is 💀👑 ultimate kink so please shut up Janis: Errm they're your lovers, not mine Jimmy: sound more gutted, mate Janis: what is it this time Janis: 😍 for you or them Jimmy: Me obvs Jimmy: keep up, girl Janis: thanks for saying I'm doing a 🥇🏆 job Jimmy: You're not gay, Judith Jimmy: And even if you were, you ain't 🥇 enough to fake 😍 for them Janis: that was very affirming and then rude Janis: but I'll take it Jimmy: There you go then Jimmy: I'd offer you a gold star but that's a bit Janis: insulting at this point Jimmy: I never thought you were Janis: ? Jimmy: Why did you reckon I thought you were gay? Janis: 'cos you said I was obsessed with them Jimmy: Nah Jimmy: I said the bollocks they say and do is more important to you than it is to me Janis: You might wanna work on your phrasing then Janis: but idc Jimmy: Alright Janis: but for the record, I only think you're gay for Dan Jimmy: @iantaylor8 Janis: v offensive that I've not affirmed your heterosexuality in his 👀 Jimmy: I'll live Janis: I won't Janis: deeply wounded Jimmy: Tah for the warning so I don't go arse over in the blood Janis: not a very heroic way to die Janis: even Romeo did better Jimmy: He had Bill, I'm holding my own 🖋 Janis: hot Jimmy: 😏 Janis: [tweets that gem] Jimmy: [having another flirt via socials] Janis: [love that for you] Jimmy: Have you got a balcony? Janis: Sadly not Janis: been let down big time there Jimmy: And I couldn't fit the 🎻 in my overnight bag Janis: Just when we needed it most Jimmy: it's a piss poor shout, I'm sorry baby Janis: It's alright, in terms of convincing them we're fucking all night, probably need a less 💔 soundtrack Jimmy: 👍 or 👎 to Romeo + Juliet soundtrack? Janis: yes Janis: of course Jimmy: 💕 Jimmy: For an all nighter we've got our Easter Rising one an' all, Tah Dan Janis: He'll be thrilled he's having a hand in our fictional fuckfest, I'm sure Janis: a hand in was the best choice of words there Jimmy: He'll be getting me through it 🍆💦💦 Janis: 🤤 hard same Janis: you were such a cockblock Jimmy: Invite him over, I'll go home Janis: He probably has a curfew Janis: God bless Jimmy: Bringing him into it an' all again Janis: He does reside here Janis: apparently Janis: I've never seen him and he doesn't do any chores but Jimmy: holy 👻 and unholy 👻 boy in your gaff Jimmy: might be a scrap Janis: you'll be buzzin' then Janis: making your night over and over, babe Jimmy: can't stop being #goals you Janis: not an amateur Jimmy: loads of time to prove it in a bit Janis: challenge accepted Jimmy: 👍 Janis: You do sleepovers with your mates before? Jimmy: Why? Janis: 🤷 Janis: curious Janis: not as talked about Janis: what do boys do Jimmy: What do you reckon? Jimmy: I'd be gutted to 💔 you Janis: Obviously I'm 💔 that you don't talk about girls and 'practice' kissing Janis: but if you confirm you just play videogames and drink cheap beers on the low, I think I'll survive Jimmy: We do talk about girls but there's no need to practice kissing when you're this 😎🏆 Janis: 😏 okay Janis: not sharing your expertise is selfish of you Jimmy: My ex shared it round plenty, don't worry Jimmy: Half the north knows my tips and tricks Janis: Bummer Janis: No thinking I'm special then, I hear you Jimmy: I can't stop you thinking owt Janis: It's alright, I'm specials in every other way Jimmy: Bighead strikes again Janis: yeah, try and deny it, dickhead Jimmy: That you think you're special? Janis: You know what I meant Janis: you 🙊 me 🙉 Jimmy: Oi I'm 🦍 Jimmy: Ask my man Janis: You're SO hench, babe Jimmy: 💪🏆🥇 Janis: I'm SO lucky Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: You picked a film for us to not watch yet? Janis: I'm debating what the worst romcom of all time is Jimmy: [sends her a little list because he's had a nightmare girlfriend] Jimmy: off the top of my head Janis: kink unlocked Janis: that's worse than any of the others so far, God Janis: deviant Jimmy: Piss off Janis: No wonder they all love you Jimmy: They ain't unlocked any of my kinks, real or fake Janis: Are you sure? Janis: they're accomplished stalkers if fuck all else, like Jimmy: I don't have a tinder with 'em listed Jimmy: What are they gonna stalk? Janis: Yo 🧠 Janis: vampire style Jimmy: You're the only 🧛 I've met Janis: 😏 Janis: and I'd do it again Janis: were I not bound to protect you Jimmy: Crack on Jimmy: If we're meant to be pulling a 💕 all nighter you'll have to do something Janis: If we're convincing enough, they'll spread it 'fore us Janis: spare your precious skin Jimmy: Challenge accepted Jimmy: [is extra on socials again for the final time like see how convincing I am] Janis: I know it didn't hurt that bad, baby Jimmy: Do you? Janis: Did it? Jimmy: 🤐 Janis: That's not fair Janis: if I Mike Tyson'd you you have to say Jimmy: I'll tell you in my oscar speech Janis: You'll be thanking me then Janis: ha, knew you loved it Jimmy: for the adversity Jimmy: tah Janis: pisstake Jimmy: you Janis: ☝ boy Jimmy: Why are you trying to truth or dare me before I'm in the door? Calm it down, Joan Janis: Party don't start 'til you walk in? Janis: Psh Jimmy: I need an audience and a stage, Bill can relate Janis: Duh Janis: what it's all about Jimmy: #whenshegetsyou Janis: we're a step away from a contract Jimmy: 🩸🖋💌 Janis: trying to tempt me with some bloodletting Janis: 😳 is it hot in here Jimmy: I wanna get my 🎟🎟🎟🎟🎟 too Janis: you already knew that one Janis: #eargate Jimmy: Yeah but now you're in the mood Jimmy: might let loads slip Janis: You'll have to work harder than this Jimmy: [🔥 sext because why not] Janis: did your driver co-write that or Jimmy: You can ask him when you pay him, that won't be weird Janis: just wondering where the audience is Jimmy: Post it if you wanna find them, not gonna be far away Janis: [does not] Janis: I'm not going to make you meet my parents, by the way Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: Should be a rule that Jimmy: I'd bleed to keep you away from mine Janis: Now you're just trying to be hot Jimmy: 😎🚬 Jimmy: #effortless Janis: you better not be in that car Janis: not paying your cleaning bill too Jimmy: It's behind the ear you didn't take off Jimmy: We're alright Janis: Can't say I'm not fair 😏 Jimmy: Not when anyone's about Janis: I know the audience too Jimmy: Be a long night if you don't Janis: shut up Janis: they'll crash before we do anyway Janis: then you can actually do what you want Jimmy: I know you wanna talk about girls and play videogames like a northern lad Jimmy: 🥧🥔🍺 weren't the meal deal though 💔 Janis: 🖕 Janis: oh no, however will I cope Jimmy: I dunno, mate Jimmy: I'll have to double up on the heroics, me Janis: you're allowed to sleep, you know Janis: overtime ain't an all-nighter too Jimmy: might do but I only chucked the one bottle in my basket Janis: we've got some great sleeping pills Janis: dessert 💕 Jimmy: You're alright Janis: 🤷 Janis: not on commission Jimmy: You must know the audience if you're trying to knock me out this hard Janis: How long can we be in each other's company before you try to seriously injure me Janis: nothing but self-preservation here Jimmy: Oi Jimmy: I know my own 💪🏆 Janis: Doing it on purpose don't make it no better Janis: 'less I asked for it, obvs Jimmy: Are you? Jimmy: 'Cause if that's a #kinkunlocked I'll have my 🎟 Janis: 🙊 Janis: depends Jimmy: ? Janis: 💀👑 is definitely a freak Janis: probably just encourage her to keep 👀 Jimmy: 🍿 or 📹? Janis: cotton balls soaked in 0cal 'butter' spray Jimmy: 😋😋😋 Janis: though if she were to 📹 wouldn't be the first time Janis: still getting tagged 🙄 Jimmy: #same Janis: hmm, at least your tits aren't low-key out Jimmy: I'll get 'em out tonight Jimmy: Only fair Janis: 😂 Janis: clearly dying to anyway Jimmy: They're 🥇 I gotta keep it #goals Janis: this town ain't big enough for both our heads Jimmy: It's alright, I ain't gonna be here long Janis: Nah? Jimmy: 💔🎻💔 Janis: Yeah, well convincing that one Jimmy: Not on the clock yet Janis: 🍀 you Jimmy: 💀👑 got you plaiting or 💅? Either way you're gonna need some glue Janis: not touching her without gloves Janis: one of your girlfriends is asking about you Jimmy: Duh we'd get caught for the 🔪🔪💀 before we had chance to piss off anywhere Jimmy: Which one? Janis: you're pissing off anyway, I'll have to live, murder and die here Janis: now you're interested Jimmy: Oh come on, baby, where I go, you go 💕 Janis: you can drop me off the first place that isn't here Jimmy: 👌 Janis: kink unlocked Janis: have a 🎟 Jimmy: Common sense ain't one Janis: don't tell me what my kinks are and aren't, boy Janis: you're not in control like that Jimmy: I'm 👮🚔 remember Jimmy: might be a kink division Janis: you are ridiculous Janis: and garda ain't telling me nothing Jimmy: I ain't a paddy, law's different up North, that'll be why it's grim Janis: I've seen the procedurals, mate Janis: you aren't old and grizzled enough to be the maverick Jimmy: Stop flirting with me Jimmy: You'll make the driver 😳 Janis: 🤞 you crash, of course Jimmy: Not unless it's right outside yours and you can throw yourself in front as we do Jimmy: 💀💀💀 pact not 👻 me and widow you Janis: but you love black Janis: but fine, I'll throw myself on the wreckage Jimmy: on me, give a shit what you wear, hun Janis: fine, I'll go play dress up with them Janis: good luck faking 😍 then Jimmy: Oi Jimmy: 1. PJs or I ain't coming in Jimmy: 2. maybe I wanna be pretty an' all, bit rude not to wait for the love of your life Jimmy: 3. 🥇 or nowt Janis: 1. admit you care more Janis: 2. you're pretty enough, sweetheart Janis: 3. 💪 Jimmy: More than what? Janis: just more than you protesting Jimmy: About what? Janis: that you don't give a shit what I wear Janis: you started a # Jimmy: Mr Lucas gives a shit what you wear, I just fake it Janis: real mvp Janis: he'd be way more buzzing my parents were out Jimmy: probably a bit late to invite him Jimmy: I reckon I'm here near enough Janis: know how you feel about threesomes Janis: I'll come find you Jimmy: first off, it were you who 🚫 my proposition for us and that dickhead of yours to have one Jimmy: second, you better had, you did 🤞 Janis: Was not Janis: and he's not MY dickhead, just a dickhead, don't put that on me Janis: [meeting him dramatically 'cos they watching, turning her eyes up to the window so he can see] Jimmy: [we know he's gonna go with it and we know why so] Janis: [we all know you're both grateful for an excuse to kiss each other on sight] Jimmy: [pick her up boy even though you'll have to put down what you're carrying #priorities] Janis: [when y'all would NEVER let a man lmao] Jimmy: [we all know y'all are lowkey like DON'T TOUCH ME] Janis: [tbf a boy was like i can pick you up when i was like 13 and i was like you can't and then he tried and was like oh you're heavy rude you're just weak] Jimmy: [I'm so 😡] Janis: [don't need that potential trigger in your life ladies] Jimmy: [I'm dying though like get inside you two, there's never any need to go as hard or long as you do] Janis: [so method lol] Jimmy: [Gotta like throw the food at her as soon as you're inside because a second has passed without being rude and god forbid] Janis: [just judging his choices like hmm 'cos same] Jimmy: [😒 like oi as if he's not just been rude but opening the gin even before there's glasses #calm down] Janis: [raising a brow but not saying anything 'cos you're like yeah, fair, pointing him over to wherever the glasses are so you can fake cook this meal real quick] Jimmy: [raising his own like oh you fancy as if he was just gonna swig it from the bottle forever but pours some into her mouth first because so needed and shamelessly flirty all the time before going to sort glasses like nothing even happened okay] Janis: ['have some decorum, boy' 😏 until he does that then you're like 😳 'tryna get me drunk too' tutting dramatically] Jimmy: [just shakes his head also 😏 at the words and the tuts 'Don't worry, I know, wouldn't be very goals, that'] Janis: [shrugs 'depends'] Jimmy: [gives her a look like I know it would be for you but we don't set the goals] Janis: [looking back 'til the microwave pings and brings you back 'round 'you've seen 'em at parties, right pissheads'] Jimmy: [Shrugs 'You're a lightweight, and we've got content to create' realises that rhymes and does a little flourish in the air like he's writing with a pen cos poet and nerd] Janis: [when you can't help but lol, even though you're trying to 🙄 is creating #content already and making this meal look #aesthetic and #goals for the 'gram before pushing a plate at him like there you go] Jimmy: [control your 😍 over her cute laugh by acting like that food is so interesting and important] Janis: [but don't control it too hard 'cos cringe couples always take pics of each other eating so get ready for your closeup boy] Jimmy: [that's tea and you know they are seeing/interacting with all this nonsense so you gotta go for it] Janis: [hence you know to stay out the kitchen but you won't, like what you need ladies] Jimmy: [thank god they'd hear them coming so he can be like come sit on my lap for a sec as if that's where she's been the whole time, just not practical, I'd throw food all over you by accident boo] Janis: [again, doing things y'all would never do, and we know you two love this so] Jimmy: [like I'mma just feed you something girl let's see how hard we can trigger Mia] Janis: [how you don't lol, just permanent 😏 like living your best life] Jimmy: [we've only just begun to live] Janis: [classic 'oh you've got something here-' and shamelessly caressing his face] Jimmy: [shameless makeout sesh ensues because if you stay now gals you're the ones making it weird] Janis: [clearly overstaying your welcome for slightly too long before making a comment and running off giggling like you're 12] Jimmy: [let you go 🚬 once they're gone boy cos longest uber ride ever] Janis: [truly, the struggle is so real, wait 'til we make you go on the bus that goes all 'round the houses lol] Jimmy: [hasn't invited her cos we back to being rude obvs] Janis: [so charming lol, on the sofa like 😒] Jimmy: [when you're ages and we know it's because you always need all the moments after kissing her] Janis: you want me to pay for 🚬 or what Jimmy: Save the flex for one that's more #relatable to the fans Janis: I asked if you'd got 'em, could've warned me if I weren't getting none, like Jimmy: Come here Janis: You can save it for me Janis: take breaks in shifts Janis: professional Jimmy: Alright Janis: 👌 Janis: soz, btw Jimmy: For what? Janis: not brushing my teeth Janis: know its a big pet peeve Jimmy: used to how minging you are by now, Josephine Janis: if you gave some warning Janis: face hugger Jimmy: soz I can't always hear 💀👑's bones creaking, bit deaf, me Jimmy: might be the one ear Jimmy: and anyway it depends Janis: It's romantic, you wanna be a great artiste, don't you Janis: and what does it depend on then Jimmy: Why would I wanna be owt of the sort? Jimmy: It depends what lads you've had round before me, what else? Janis: get bitches get money Janis: obvs Janis: I was talking about being mid-dinner, don't act like you didn't know Jimmy: 👌 Janis: will ask about getting that revolving door installed though Janis: tah for the reminder Jimmy: Gracie'll be 👍 when you do Janis: yeah Janis: whole house full of slags, like Jimmy: you do live in the middle of nowt, gotta have something to do Janis: decent excuse Jimmy: only so much horse riding even a rich girl can do Janis: one in the same if you're that kind of rich girl Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: obvs Janis: have to have one to pay for the other Janis: basic maths Jimmy: Alright 🤓 Janis: giving you 💰 tips for nothing here Jimmy: can't take it with me Janis: why not Jimmy: What do you mean? Jimmy: I reckon hell's got a free bar in the very least Janis: Optimistic Janis: I've at least heard that passage, like Janis: you'd be so lucky Jimmy: if you want the pessimistic angle, it'll rot in the ground Jimmy: got that covered Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: [comes back in cos can't be out there forever] Janis: [puts hand out like gimme 'cos obvs you need to leave immediately] Jimmy: [does but also gives her look like bit rude] Janis: [a look like you started it but still saying thanks, not a heathen] Jimmy: [chucks her his jacket/hoodie or whatever even though it's april] Janis: ['good thinking' as she walks out the door] Jimmy: [drink your gin boy] Janis: [clearly taking a cute selfie in that, minus cigarette] Jimmy: [be extra fake to hide how good you think she actually looks please] Janis: [ah the fakery of it all this is fine lollol] Jimmy: [I'm gonna give her a bit then have him come out like he DESPERATELY needs something from his pocket suddenly 1. what even would that be boy 2. no you don't 3. you also don't need to be so hot about it like reaching over her and all that jazz] Janis: [just a LOOK] Jimmy: [when your plan was to just walk away but of course you have to give her a look back] Janis: [offering out the 🚬 like he didn't just have his own, but then doing the sexy blowback moment when he's like okay] Jimmy: [he's just dying now, aren't we all, like didn't expect that did you bitch] Janis: [definition of 😏] Jimmy: [walk away Jimothy you're in too deep] Jimmy: [but I like to imagine he walks into one of the flat whites when he's all flustered, feed that narrative even by accident lads] Janis: [joy of joys, poor boy lol] Janis: you can pick a film Janis: one you might actually wanna watch then one to switch back to Jimmy: Challenge accepted Janis: 👍 Janis: Brb, I'll go pretend to do what girls do Janis: [comes in but goes upstairs] Jimmy: [we all know he's watching her go, boy be careful] Janis: [we all throwing all the glances like this ain't a dangerous game] Jimmy: [take the time she's upstairs to calm down please and thank you sir] Janis: [we out here brushing out teeth obvs] Jimmy: [so soz Janis but at least being in there can give you the idea for bathgate] Janis: [🔥💡] Jimmy: [what could possibly go wrong like] Janis: [hohahaha] Jimmy: [sending her some of his fave comments from what they've posted so far cos shady bitch] Janis: [likewise 'cos likewise] Janis: wish Dan would comment though Janis: what's he up to Jimmy: 💔💔 Hang on Jimmy: [has a stalk and likewise sends her his fave things he finds] Janis: awh Janis: what a man Jimmy: that his missus? Jimmy: 🔪🔪 Janis: so jealous Janis: learn to be fake happy Jimmy: in a bit, gotta go arrange a 🥇 threesome Jimmy: be really happy after Janis: wait 'til you're off the clock Janis: do whatever you want then Jimmy: UGH Janis: it's mutual Jimmy: 🤞 that's what Dan's girlfriend'll say Janis: she's dating Dan Janis: her lack of sense and taste is obvious and in your favour, congrats Jimmy: I KNOW HE'S SOOOOOOOO 🥇👑😍🏆💪 Jimmy: tah for the #hype babes Jimmy: I reckon now I can 🎯 Janis: [comes down like let's get this over with] Jimmy: [puts on whatever he can bear to watch cos even the flat whites ain't gonna appear that quick] Janis: [and sitting as far apart as you can without it being impossible to be all over each other in 5 secs when needed] Jimmy: [does top up her drink for her though cos isn't as rude as he pretends to be] Janis: [cheers and drinks that too fast] Jimmy: [he's gone the other way and barely touched his because he's like I'm clearly too drunk rn after what happened with the blowbacks] Janis: [ah the confusion and awkwardness] Jimmy: [just on his phone even though he should wanna watch this since he picked it lol] Janis: [getting herself more drink that isn't gin] Jimmy: [wise move babe] Janis: [although mixing perhaps isn't, but rude like that and it isn't as if you've hung with anyone in time now nevermind the clusterfuck of what is this] Jimmy: [Christ knows what he had to drink before he got here so likewise a dickhead and likewise antisocial we know] Janis: [can't leave this forever though have some of 'em run through like we need drinks or whatever they're coming up with, so you gotta low-key launch yourself at him and get into some kind of snuggle position like oh hey but also not hey, only 😍 for him soz] Jimmy: [he changed it to a rom-com cos good reflexes though] Janis: [offering them the gin like I'm such a nice person and I'm so good here 'cos that'll piss Mia off] Jimmy: [when you have to snuggle her extra hard cos you're trying not to lol] Janis: [tickling him 'cos PDA comes in so many forms why are you just watching this lmao] Jimmy: [when he'd be so mad about it but all he can do rn is playfight cos gotta be 😍] Janis: [when you know it so now you're loling too with secret 😏 that only he gonna pick up on] Jimmy: [gotta exploit wherever she's most ticklish like 😏] Janis: [regrets, you have none, even though you're dying] Jimmy: [just having fun working out all the bae's ticklish places like this is so casual] Janis: [all 'oh my god, stop' in that fake ass don't stop way] Jimmy: ['make me' cos we all know what that means haha] Janis: [mmmmmakeout time, take your cue to leave] Jimmy: [when you're so into it you don't notice that they've left for a bit] Janis: [always think that like how you breaking this up just like, anyway] Jimmy: [honestly forever going 0-1000 and back again like this is fine] Janis: [no wonder you going cray] Jimmy: [literally, unrelated but did Mia take that gin or nah? lol] Janis: [I feel like Asia took it like yay and Mia will tell her off lmao] Jimmy: [that's real af so I second it and Grace is gonna drink it cos they are doing her head in] Janis: [when you need to get drunk to enjoy your friend's company, happy days] Jimmy: [when your friends are so obsessed with your sister and her man though] Janis: [soz it's a moment babe] Jimmy: [just you wait til bathgate gals] Janis: [oh lordy] Janis: what else do girls like them like then Janis: 'cos you got to admit, it's a laugh getting to 'em and winding them up Jimmy: [a really cute concentration face while he's thinking] Jimmy: Facemasks? Janis: [hiding your 😍 by pulling a pisstakey face] Janis: alright, but I ain't putting any of the weird shit on they do Janis: especially if I end up looking as rough as them Jimmy: Hang on, I'll go ask Gracie if she's got any of those bollocks sheet ones everyone 📷 themselves in Jimmy: What animal do you wanna be? Janis: 🤔 are you serious Jimmy: 🙀 it is then? Alright, I'll ask Jimmy: [Gets up and heads towards the stairs] Janis: you don't even know what room is hers Jimmy: I'll follow the 😱😱😱 Jimmy: [and is] Janis: your ⚰ Jimmy: 🤞 Janis: I'll chill here and ponder my inevitable grief-fuelled suicide Jimmy: hot Janis: soz you won't be around to 👀 Jimmy: 👻 Janis: a 👻 with a threesome to plan Jimmy: I won't be able to touch nowt so I might as well 👀 you 🔪⚰ Janis: love being 2nd choice Janis: 😏 Jimmy: Dan's missus is 🥈 you're 🥉 my dear Janis: fuck off and hurry up Jimmy: [Comes back with the masks like 😏 and of course puts hers on her even though she easily could herself but gotta have that whole MOMENT of him getting her hair out of the way first cos shamelessly loves touching it] Janis: [when this is somehow more intimate than anything you've done so far so you're like where do I put my eyes] Jimmy: [they're really sticky though and he isn't expecting it so he's like wtf and grossed out but then amused at himself and it's so cute bye] Janis: [yeah they're gross she's probably horrified so that'll break the tension just like what the fuck but lol too] Jimmy: [he's genuinely smiling and loling for the first time since god knows when] Janis: [when he's so cute you have to slap this ridiculous on his face fast] Jimmy: [what animals should they be? I think he should be a 🐼 cos lol] Janis: [that's a popular one, we can say there was a 🐱 'cos why not] Jimmy: [yass take your nerdy selfies lads] Janis: [when they'd still look cute too, arseholes] Jimmy: [I'm as fuming about that as Grace would be that he came to her room when she's been hiding all night] Janis: [things are only gonna get worse soz gurl] Janis: this is a great poker face Janis: [says something #shocking and ridiculous with the dead face it gives you to prove the point] Jimmy: [when you lol and yours slips cos they do and they are crap but you take it off and throw it at her anyway cos it's wet and gross and you hate it] Jimmy: decent weapon an' all Janis: [throwing it right back like excuse me] Janis: you're a child Jimmy: @iantaylor8 Janis: if you wanna go home, phones over there, baby Janis: [throws the masks in the direction of like an animal] Jimmy: [moves like he's gonna get up and go but nudges her playfully instead like what's next] Janis: [ponders seriously] Janis: I need to get this gunk off me Janis: [pulls him up like follow me, does not need to be hand-holding but are going upstairs so you know, just in case] Jimmy: [love it and so does he] Janis: [I say get in that bathroom] Jimmy: [gets in the bath like he did at the party just watching her sort her face out] Janis: [looking at him via the mirror like what are you doing but amused not annoyed] Jimmy: [hits her with a 'What?' like he's not shamelessly looking at her] Janis: [nods like 'you want me to run that or?'] Jimmy: [just reclining in there like a nerd and shrugs] Janis: [shakes her head and comes over, acts like she's leaning over to turn the shower on, but doesn't and instead gets in the other end like, see why you like it so much] Jimmy: [does a hand movement like he's splashing her with imaginary water cos oi] Janis: ['nerd' 😏 but reclining and putting her feet in her lap like don't mind me] Janis: his* Jimmy: [just being soft instead doing the this little pig went to market thing to her toes quietly like it's meant to be under his breath but it's not his own funny version probably cos he is a nerd] Janis: [just letting this be even though being soft freaks you the fuck out on the low 'you're so weird, new kid' under her own but nudging him just in case he's forgotten that that's a ref and not a massive drag] Jimmy: [shakes his head like ah good times cos he obvs remembers 'feels like ages ago that'] Janis: ['yeah' and pausing 'cos truly, so much going down in such a short space of time 'didn't think you'd still be here- not in my bath, like'] Jimmy: [nods cos same] Janis: [when you feel the mood shift so you're like away from that topic 'we'll always have the playlist'] Jimmy: [he obvs puts it on cos that bitch but quietly so Mia and Co don't hear it over their music or film or whatever and judge] Janis: [just like what kinda mood music lol, just grooving lowkey 'well worth the A'] Jimmy: [😍 cos I can't stop him if she's gonna be that much of a babe] Janis: [hitting him back with a 'what?' but in a challenging kinda way] Jimmy: [getting out of the tub like he's just remembered he's still got that mask residue on his face which true but like you don't have to literally deal with it this second] Janis: [just stretching out and back, closing her eyes] Jimmy: [taking his t-shirt off cos he said he'd get his tits out and also it means he can throw it at her playfully before washing his face] Janis: [shook and then 😠 'it stinks' and throwing it back like okay it so clearly doesn't babe] Jimmy: [😏 to hide the fact you're lowkey worried that you do smell like oh no and because you're awks and you don't want her to know, pulling her up to sit on the edge of the bath so you can take a selfie kissing her whilst topless for the fans because that's as far as your contribution to bathgate has got so far] Jimmy: [but then you stop to make sure the bath looks aesthetic and generally faff like she did with the food earlier so excuse to go again for the re-do] Janis: [taking it and reposting it on your story with 😍 over his nips] Jimmy: [🙄 even though you're actually amused cos can't let that show] Janis: ['you wanna be x-rated?' at the 🙄] Jimmy: [Gives her a look like well that depends what you mean even though he knows she ain't suggesting they get x-rated 'cause cheeky like that] Janis: [winks but then gets off of the edge of the bath, going through wherever all the bath lotions and potions are kept 'run it hot, lover boy'] Jimmy: [raises an eyebrow but obviously does and draws the infamous love heart with JJ inside in the steam on the mirror] Janis: [bringing over an armful of shit and picking a bottle and pouring a stupid amount in, looking at him like, fill your boots] Jimmy: [when you have fun putting loads of shit in like when you're a kid and you make potions] Janis: [Grace gon' be fuming again, so soz but not really, when there's an aesthetic amount of bubbles and colour going on, taking a deep breath and hoping you did that quiet enough as you take your clothes off like in we get] Jimmy: [puts loud music on so you can pretend you're busy with that not 👀 at her] Janis: [at least there's sooo many bubbles to artfully place lol this is fine this is normal] Jimmy: [when you wanna be like are you sure because you're a soft good boy but you also don't wanna ask because it's gotta be all so fake and you don't care so you're just lowkey taking an age outside that tub pretending it's because you're getting the lighting and angles right and bollocks like that] Janis: [just letting him 'cos not trying to be a pushy bitch but also like, well I've done it now boy so 'you can leave your pants on' but in a tone of, again, I haven't so] Jimmy: [well we know he won't and doesn't cos there's a challenge there and they are always accepted] Janis: [when you don't wanna 👀 but also don't wanna make a massive point of turning away 'cos that's not chill and idgaf attitude so you focus on looking at his face and then instantly regret that 'cos eye contact like oh, we doing this] Jimmy: [such intense eye contact being maintained like okay we just eye fucking rn this is fine] Janis: [when anything and everything you could possibly say rn sounds like double entendre, like is it hot enough for you etc, so you just settle for 'okay?'] Jimmy: [can only nod because likewise can't trust himself to speak atm] Janis: [taking a picture of the bath setup to be like #boydonegood about it but you know you're just buying time before the actual show of it all] Jimmy: [letting that happen because not gonna be a dick about it] Janis: ['you're the photographer, how do we get the best shot?'] Jimmy: [you move boy because we don't need to force her to and have a bubble nip slip when we've only just begun but like obvs position her however you do need to because we're obvs taking this very seriously here and the cute concentration face is back] Janis: [just shamelessly watching him work, but definitely moving closer than he positioned you like is this okay, testing those limits honey] Jimmy: [just says 'Alright' like are you asking her as a question or are you saying you are or are you like we're ready, what's the truth Jimothy] Janis: ['is it?'] Jimmy: ['isn't it?' Boy you're so annoying] Janis: [splashes him, using the water to mess up his hair appropriately 'just take the photo then'] Jimmy: [when you're gonna be like 😒 oi but that's actually a good idea when it clicks what she's doing and you take the shameless excuse to be like 'hang on' and run your wet hands through her hair too and we all see you taking your time with that] Janis: [just not breathing 'til he's done 'how do we look?' and a LOOK 'cos you can see how he looks] Jimmy: ['you look-' only breaking that LOOK to stare at her lips honey 'goals, obvs' eventually gets said because focus boy but it's so not what he was gonna say goodbye] Janis: [when you're so frustrated the 'come on then' comes out so easily] Jimmy: [taking so many pics from so many different angles and kissing her in so many different ways like do you need to be this extra, the answer is no but also yes] Janis: [when you're going in, like you're ever uploading more than one of these each like yes, we need all these options] Jimmy: [like we all know at certain points the camera ain't even taking pics but they haven't noticed/ do not care] Janis: [we all know with the amount of shit you put in its gonna be slippery as hell so gonna allow you to legit slip further onto him without it being a shameless oopsies moment] Jimmy: [add to that how good it would feel to not just be stopping and starting like you've had to all night #dangerous] Janis: [when the pretense of making noise for them is so thin at this point like okay] Jimmy: [regretting putting that loud music on now aren't you boy because yeah good luck not making all the sounds ever rn that only she can hear] Janis: [we know no one is stopping to turn it down rn] Jimmy: [they wouldn't stop if the bath fell through the ceiling rn lol] Janis: [true that, just gently pulling him down so he's laying on her like are you even in frame] Jimmy: [we know he's not and nobody's bothered god bless] Janis: [how far are we letting this go/how do we stop 'em lol] Jimmy: [that's what I'm thinking cos like someone could knock on the bathroom door like excuse you but that might just encourage them more depending on who they think it is] Jimmy: [maybe one of them actually could slip because actually perilous?] Janis: [orrr what if they didn't actually lock the door 'cos when you're faking it'd be bants if they walked in but now it ain't so you'll both be mad] Jimmy: [AMAZING we simply must] Janis: [💀#2 enter] Jimmy: [when you literally can't get out of that bath regardless of what happens because too turned on and even if you grab a towel that's not really gonna hide anything so you're just like ...........] Janis: [at least you can take the lead like get the fuck out bitch Jimmy: [he'd be actually shook though cos like this early on there's a part of him that still doesn't realise how far the flat whites are willing to take shit but then oh hey girl] Janis: [they're just so immature truly, like when Liv was like WE'RE NOT IN YEAR 11 ANYMORE' to Mini lmao like y'all are but still, we're mature laydeez now] Jimmy: [honestly, Grace and Janis would have a reason to be stuck cos their sister died when they were 12, what's y'alls] Janis: [#eatingdisordersquad Jimmy: [And Mia's weird daddy's girl energy ew] Janis: [this is why y'all are only friends with each other, lordy] Jimmy: [I'm intrigued to know what Ava thinks because she didn't exist before and like] Janis: [she'd think they were really tragic and cringe but it's not like she has to hang with them longer than the odd event like Grace's bdays so she wouldn't be like umm your friends] Jimmy: [poor Grace in a toxic relationship with someone for a decade that she doesn't even get to bang] Janis: [come get your toxic friend 'fore she get drowned lmao] Jimmy: [you know Mia would cos can't resist] Janis: [well that's that ruined, just getting out towels and taking one so he can get dried in some semblance of privacy, like] Jimmy: [the levels of fuming] Janis: [some time] Janis: my room is upstairs again Jimmy: 👌 Janis: but if you wanna go Janis: get that Jimmy: And let 💀👑 win? Piss off Jimmy: You're the 🙀 Janis: How am I Jimmy: You scare easily, we worked that out ages ago Janis: Bollocks, you take the piss and have done for ages Jimmy: How do I? Janis: not scared of anything Janis: least of all 💀s Jimmy: Easy to 🗨 Janis: Not as easy to live Janis: but I manage Jimmy: Can you manage to think of owt that'll pay her back or what? Jimmy: You said they'll crash before us Janis: I'm thinking Janis: sure could make her piss herself or shave off her eyebrows but not 12 and it needs to be something better Jimmy: Duh Janis: Clearly not that duh Janis: can't blame 'em for lacking the mental capacities I guess but still will Jimmy: Can't think of nowt when you're starving to 💀💀💀 Jimmy: #relatable Janis: you're thinking of your stomach rn Jimmy: Yeah? Janis: so fat Jimmy: 😱😱😱 Janis: convention down the hall, go learn some tips Jimmy: in a bit then Janis: 👌 Jimmy: 💕 Janis: Hope you're dressed this time Jimmy: They don't so I obvs am Janis: Exactly Janis: probably time for more desperate measures Janis: restraining orders all 'round Jimmy: When should I date yours for, Jules? Jimmy: About a week from now or? Janis: Suits me Janis: works both ways Jimmy: 👍 Janis: where are you actually Janis: it's sinister creepin' about like a 👻 Jimmy: ? Janis: I like to know where everyone is Janis: know where to avoid Janis: don't need repeats Jimmy: I'm outside Jimmy: Avoid the 🚬☁ Janis: Will do Janis: add it to the score I'm keeping though Jimmy: Or just keep up Janis: I'm avoiding your secondhand smoke Janis: put it behind your ear, I'll find it Jimmy: Like I said 🙀 you Jimmy: And you're meant to inhale not bite down Jimmy: so I probably won't put it there Janis: Now who's the pussy Janis: and you told me to Janis: not standing the opposite end of the garden like an overgrown gnome Jimmy: still you then Jimmy: dark's nowt to be scared of, babe Janis: stop saying I'm scared, dickhead Janis: I'm just not a smoker Jimmy: since when, dickhead? Janis: since forever Jimmy: Bollocks Janis: I'm a convincing fake, I know Janis: nothing real about me, remember? Jimmy: 🙄👏🏆 Janis: not that impressive a quote, honestly Janis: you've said better Jimmy: You've done better Janis: 💔 Janis: so sorry Jimmy: I'll be here with the orchestra lads Jimmy: [sends her a little vid of him doing a 🎻 mime] Janis: 🙄😏 Janis: keep that one between us Janis: dunno what that'd imply about the last post but nothing good Jimmy: ❌ my 💘 Janis: deflate your ego more like Janis: can't have you walking 'round like pinhead Jimmy: What ego? Janis: 🙊 Jimmy: Fake dating you, aren't I? Janis: Yeah Janis: you're so lucky Jimmy: Desperate more like Janis: That's obvious Jimmy: Gotta keep it #goals baby Jimmy: 😍😍🤤🤤 Jimmy: can't get enough ever, me Janis: Already said you're fat Janis: preferences in common with them is no surprise to me Jimmy: actually 💔 Jimmy: will have to go home for a 😭😭 Janis: Enjoy Janis: 👋 Jimmy: Enjoy your 🚬 oh wait nah Jimmy: Enjoy the IOU Jimmy: 🏃 Janis: Like you're the only boy with bad habits and a lighter Jimmy: Cavemen invented 🔥 so you'll be grand 🍀 girl Jimmy: if you 🍑📞 party boy now I can kick his uber soon as he gets out, job done Janis: I wanna be disappointed twice in one day like you wanna hang 'round this place Jimmy: so crack on Janis: Funny Jimmy: the joke is I'm still waiting for you to think up a proper idea to piss off them lot Jimmy: sort it out Janis: night's still young Janis: and where's your idea Jimmy: I get it, I look half decent for 45, stop flirting with me and concentrate Janis: What ego? Jimmy: 😏 Janis: I don't know Janis: the problem is everything pisses them off Janis: Grace cries at the drop of a hat, for fuck's sake Janis: it's too easy Jimmy: Alright, what if we give 'em something they really want instead Janis: Self-esteem and good hair? Jimmy: Something they reckon they want but they don't want from us Jimmy: Your gin trick but amplified Jimmy: 💀💀💀 with 💕 Janis: I see what you're saying Janis: bit too soon to hand out invites to the fake wedding Janis: but if you can stomach it, we can give them the attention they're after Jimmy: 🥇 me Jimmy: Nowt I can't handle Jimmy: Or stomach 'cause I'm obvs such a fat git Janis: if the XXL fits Janis: right, let's go invite ourselves to the sleepover, then 🤢 Jimmy: But it looks better on you, girl 💕 Jimmy: fuck's sake Janis: you just wanna get your tits out again Jimmy: for you 😘 Janis: I'm sure I won't be able to keep my hands off you, covered titties and company be damned Jimmy: Hang on Jimmy: What if this backfires? Jimmy: might reckon I'm bored of you and wanna swap you for my truest love Jimmy: bit too real that Janis: You'll have to resist flirting with them, obviously Janis: but you aren't any good at it so I doubt that'll be an issue Janis: just try not to embarrass yourself Jimmy: Piss off Jimmy: I'm just saying if we're so 💕😍😘 why are we getting involved in their bollocks? Janis: Because, I'm such a nice person, and we're so sorry and so embarrassed about earlier? Jimmy: make it at least make fake sense, Jasmine Jimmy: But alright Janis: I don't wanna fuck any of them Janis: sorry 'bout it Janis: I don't know how else you reckon we can 💀💀💀 with 💕 Janis: soz you think you saw us fucking gift baskets Jimmy: Alright, shut up, I might be overthinking it Jimmy: Soz I'm proper 🧠 Janis: What was that about fake sense? Jimmy: What was that about you doing shit 'cause I told you to? Jimmy: 🤐 mate Janis: That's only when I wanted to do the thing anyway Janis: great at giving me excuses, you Jimmy: You wanna have a lovely chat with 'em all then, do you? Jimmy: Sound Janis: suit you if I did Janis: any excuse to ruin their night Jimmy: Suit me if we didn't have to do any talking Jimmy: I'm that romantic, obvs Janis: Done that part Janis: and you were given an out so you've got no room to complain Jimmy: Where and when was I? Janis: I've literally told you to piss off three times Jimmy: And I've told you I ain't letting 💀👑 reckon she scared me off Jimmy: Or reckon I just leave after we're done like every lad she hasn't 🐍 Janis: Alright, your choice Janis: why do you wanna look like an 😇 Jimmy: Why do you want me to look like a twat? Janis: It doesn't make you seem like a twat Jimmy: It makes it seem like a 🍑📞 that ain't what this is Janis: Obviously not Janis: we are love's young dream 🙄 Janis: my parents are only on a date night themselves though so we're gonna have to get in my room and hide you sooner rather than later Jimmy: If you want me to go, say that Janis: I don't care what you do Janis: I'm stuck regardless Janis: just saying, it's a rule, you said that Jimmy: What it is is a 🥇 excuse not to make the 💀💀💀 with 💕 a well slow death Janis: Come on then Janis: mercy kill it is Jimmy: [Appears like the 👻 he is] Janis: [avoiding eye contact like it's your job, just a nod like alright and making your way to Grace's room] Jimmy: [pulling her back like hold my hand bitch] Janis: [Clove has entered the chat, also Winnie] Jimmy: [don't think about how he'd look in whatever he packed to wear to sleep] Janis: [don't you think about it ladies, low-key giving 'em evils even though you gotta be nice Jimmy: [I'm loling because Mia would want to tell them to fuck off cos fuming he's still here but what Grace says goes because it's her house bitch and we know she loves Janis more than you so] Janis: [when you're tipsy and just happy they're here to save your night 'cos your friends have just been talking about 'em and boring you lol] Jimmy: [honestly] Jimmy: [they should be painting their nails because ofc and Grace be like offering to do Janis' cos ILY and Jimmy's like I'll do it cos that's the kind of pinterest bullshit but like he'd obvs do a good job cos artsy hoe and pick a colour she actually fucks with] Janis: [just prolonging hand-holding, we all see you boy] Jimmy: [return of the adorable concentration face] Janis: [we love to see it, when we're sneaking peeps] Jimmy: [Grace putting it on her story to do the work for you lads, Mia be raging] Janis: [hohaha, also blatantly gotta paint his 🖤] Jimmy: [Asia offering him the dregs of the gin back but he's like 'I'm alright' and 😍 at Janis cos so #nice and #lovedup bye] Janis: [smuggest happy face] Jimmy: [a little kiss that you so don't need to give her] Janis: [all pouting like you didn't gatecrash their night] Jimmy: [soz Grace you've done nothing wrong tonight but your friends suck] Janis: [we all know she's having more fun now like soz we're just doing this to piss 'em off] Jimmy: [nothing could ever piss Mia off more than how obvs it is that Grace would rather hang out with JJ so thanks babe] Janis: [doing us a solid] Jimmy: [what other cringe activities can we make coupley af?] Janis: [we could play some kind of game, as they are that childish, idk what] Jimmy: [Mia could suggest like never have I ever or something to that effect cos they're all hoes and they think Janis is such a virgin so she wants to show her up] Janis: [that's a good idea, and they could keep saying really mushy romantic things like #awh 'cos that'll really piss her off] Jimmy: [turn it around on her cos you've never had a bf have you babe so] Janis: [awkwar silence descends lmao] Jimmy: [soz again Grace] Janis: [Asia got her man god bless] Jimmy: [Grace would so end up going off to the bathroom or wherever upset so Mia would be buzzing] Janis: 😬 Janis: she doesn't have feelings to hurt Jimmy: You should go after her before 💀👑 does Jimmy: proper 😇 Janis: Ugh Janis: pains me that you're right Janis: on so many levels Janis: [goes] Jimmy: oughta be used to it by now, mate Janis: 1. ha Janis: 2. it's more about how badly I don't want to console her than it is about admitting you've ever had a good idea Janis: 3. massive headed twat Jimmy: Duh Jimmy: And I miss you already too Janis: you can run down a single flight of stairs and not get winded, yeah Janis: should you need to 🔪🔪🔪🔪 Jimmy: Is the 🔪 in my back or nah? Janis: I dunno where they'll wanna stick it first, babe Jimmy: hot Janis: if you say so Jimmy: I've still got a 💀💀💀 wish, baby, where's yours gone? Janis: you clearly don't get how much it kills me being nice to my sister Jimmy: I never said owt about being nice Jimmy: 💀👑 wouldn't be if she'd taken the job off you Janis: I'm not gonna give her a pep talk about how more dick the better either, tah Jimmy: Get your boyfriend on the line, he'll be up for having a go Janis: You're very helpful Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt Jimmy: Be why Asia's asking me how to make her lad more #goals Janis: She's shameless Janis: sadly don't have his # either or I'd dob her in Jimmy: @ [whatever his actual socials are idk because of course he knows that the shady bitch] Janis: 😂 okay gossip girl Jimmy: xoxo Janis: 😏 Janis: I'll anon it at him Janis: as I've got a rep as such a nice person Jimmy: 👍 Janis: oh Janis: he's unfortunate looking Jimmy: Did you think he'd be more 🤴 than 🐸? Jimmy: Come on Janis: 🐸 is generous Janis: tadpole, like Janis: I thought he'd at least have to be fit Janis: if she was airing you Jimmy: Piss off Janis: SHE 👏 HAS 👏 A 👏 BOYFRIEND 👏 Jimmy: I hate you Janis: Yeah yeah Jimmy: come back Janis: they're being that bad huh Jimmy: whatever you wanna call trying to dance with me, that'll do Janis: how horrific Janis: pick up your phone Janis: [calling him so they can hear being like 'we need your help to carry this' 'cos gone to make hot chocolates to cheer her] Jimmy: [a coupley af phone moment because those couples who stay on the phone til he's literally a step away from her] Janis: [nerds] Jimmy: [gives Mia the biggest mug like fuck you] Janis: [definitely put loads of baileys in and cream the whole works like drink up bitch] Jimmy: [chin chin gals] Janis: [sipping like 😏 getting cream moustaches then smooching 'em off, disgusting] Jimmy: [also they should dance cos he refused to dance with y'all] Janis: [obvs] Jimmy: [her like nah so he can be like oh please I really wanna, just to really annoy them] Janis: ['cos real also what a mental image like are you all gonna watch or are you gonna dance with each other like what's going on gals] Jimmy: [gaaaaaaaay] Janis: [just bopping sadly alone with your hot chocolate, amusement] Jimmy: [we all know Jimothy just wants to pick her up again so] Janis: [please 'fall' down onto the bed like whoops what are we like] Jimmy: [100%] Janis: [Mia's eyes boutta pop out] Jimmy: [Also Asia should 100% get a call from her man rn] Jimmy: [Jimmy trying not to cackle] Janis: [just biting your tongue so hard] Janis: 🙈 Jimmy: we need to go Janis: you don't wanna witness the downfall of your nemesis? Janis: I can always tickle you again Jimmy: You can try 💪 Janis: [does 'cos being that annoying like soz you're on the phone we're just so 😍] Jimmy: [lets it happen because he needs to lol and NO other reason NOPE] Janis: [try not to cackle lads] Jimmy: [HAS TO kiss her so he doesn't again no other reason so] Janis: [definitely not actually enjoying that, definitely doesn't have to stop it kinda abruptly 'cos will get carried away, no] Jimmy: [when you're like ? but you can't say or do anything because that audience but then 💡 you quickly trace an o and a k on her with a question mark sneakily like because I love when he does that] Janis: [just squeezing his hand like a yeah but drawing a 😒 face] Jimmy: [a genuine smile even though he should also be 😒] Janis: [I think Asia should run out to talk with her mans then come in crying so they can leave lol] Jimmy: [#mood] Janis: [ended that relationship whoops, run and lol run and lol] Jimmy: [don't be too happy tho boy you don't want her to think you actually wanna get with Asia] Janis: [she's gonna be on you harder than ever boy, oh my, like new boy guess what, god bless] Jimmy: [oh lord imagine] Janis: [at least she's not 💀👑 levels of snek, just dumb and tragic] Jimmy: [lowkey reminds him of his ex not in a 😍 way lol] Janis: [oh dear, getting to where the stairs are like 'lounge or my room?'] Jimmy: [shrug because can't answer a question] Janis: [nudges him like make a decision, boy] Jimmy: [nudges her back like no you] Janis: [looks at her non-existent watch and then pulls him up the stairs to her room] Jimmy: [off you go lads] Janis: [like cali could be home at any moment but not really #shameless] Jimmy: [you two and your flimsy excuses, love it] Janis: [is this the first time in her room?] Jimmy: [yeah because the other first time we did is when they actually hook up if memory serves so way after this] Janis: [enjoy that, boy] Jimmy: [we know his is no better and he can't judge] Janis: [at least there's shit still there from when you cared, shrugs and gestures 'round just like put some music on, do what you want] Jimmy: [👀 around like he's a nosy bitch but actually just doesn't know what to do with himself] Janis: ['you found plenty to fake do down there' 😏 but masking that you are awks too] Jimmy: [gets a pen and paper and starts doodling giving her a look like you happy now? all 😏 cos so awks] Janis: [sticks her tongue out at him, laying down and scrolling her phone 'cos we know it's popping off from #bathgate] Jimmy: [throws a paper airplane at her] Janis: ['excuse me?' sitting up, resting on her elbows like so #shook 'I'm checking we're still relevant, can I help you?'] Jimmy: [gives her a look cos they both know there's no need to check and it's all happening rn like my boo said] Janis: [mimes his head blowing up bigger and bigger then exploding, we all know she was just looking at the pictures again shh] Jimmy: [mimes a gun to his head then a dramatic fake death] Janis: [crawls over to where he is like she's gonna lick up the blood] Jimmy: [does a 🕆 with his fingers cos she such a vampire] Janis: [mimes a hiss like how dare you] Jimmy: [sets up a game of hangman on the paper and pushes it over to her] Janis: [😏 and writes down 'I?'] Jimmy: [---- -I-- - -I-- I -I-] Janis: ['E'] Jimmy: [---- -I-- - -I-- I -IE] Janis: ['D' 'cos got your number boy] Jimmy: [---- -I-- - -I-- I DIE] Janis: [lols 'L'] Jimmy: [what bit do you draw first when there isn't I've forgotten] Janis: [the pole that goes up] Janis: [pouts 'S'] Jimmy: [---S -I-- - -ISS I DIE] Janis: ['K' 'cos also got your number and a LOOK] Jimmy: [---S -I-- - KISS I DIE and blowing her a kiss IRL like we gotta keep this sassy and light] Janis: [buzzing 'cos you gonna win lol 'A'] Jimmy: [---S -I-- A KISS I DIE] Janis: ['T'] Jimmy: [T--S -IT- A KISS I DIE] Janis: [fills in the rest because now obvious 'THUS WITH A KISS I DIE' 😏 and also hanging the stickman still and making him look like him with shades and floppy hair and a leather jacket] Jimmy: [draws a stick person her crying but also a vicar and they've both got rings on and there's confetti and she's wearing a wedding veil etc cos throwback to the easter rising when she married that dude] Janis: [draws a union jack flag in the vicar's hand, then a knife in his 💘 and then draws a vial under her tears with ☠ and 'POISON' on the label] Jimmy: [😏] Janis: [adds vampire fangs to herself and two little holes on his hanged neck like excuse me thank you] Jimmy: [little lol] Janis: [lays back down 'what else do you wanna play?'] Jimmy: [lies down too LOOKING at her 'What do you wanna play?'] Janis: [stops breathing for a sec, bye but turns it into serious thinking face] Jimmy: [just staring at her, waiting but like why you gotta be so hot doing that boy] Janis: ['don't have any new games' casting her eyes over to whatever the last console she got was before she stopped giving a shit about everything 'you can talk about girls for-' invisible watch again '-five minutes, if you wanna, northern boy'] Jimmy: [talks about how much he hates Mia for a 5 minute rant lol, lying down staring up at the ceiling] Janis: [when you're so 😍 unironically thank god he's not looking] Jimmy: [nudges her when he's done like it's your go] Janis: [quick snap into a 😏 'you stole my bitch' and nudging him back then turning her eyes to the ceiling and talking about Grace instead] Jimmy: [takes his turn to talk about 💀#2 because still fuming about bathgate not that he's gonna rant about that, be careful please] Janis: [just nodding like mhmm preach then takes her turn to talk about Asia but like, try not to mention you're potentially jealous of her 'cos he might like her] Jimmy: [throws something at her like he's so offended she's slagging off his bae] Janis: ['so chivalrous!' 'cos he hit her with whatever she's now gonna hit him back with, let us assume a pillow fight for the cliche] Jimmy: [yas we need that shameless flirty MOMENT] Janis: [doing it, pinning him and tickling him like 'admit you love Asia'] Jimmy: [when you just flip reverse it 💪 so you're doing the same to her 'admit you're jealous of our true love'] Janis: [getting out a 'never!' between your lols] Jimmy: [opening and closing his mouth cos was blatantly gonna say something but then aborted mission] Janis: [reaching up and opening and closing his mouth yourself a few times like a 🐟 'catching flies, Taylor?'] Jimmy: [just sniffing her dramatically like 🤔 and giving her a look like you're not that bad] Janis: [punches his arm but vaguely affectionately lol 'how could either of us stink after that bath full of shit'] Jimmy: ['answered your own question there'] Janis: ['We smell like unicorn farts and rainbow dreams, obviously, did you not read the labels?] Jimmy: ['Too Northern'] Janis: ['Too distracted' under your breath like who said that] Jimmy: ['What?' Even though he 100% heard] Janis: ['See' and poking him in the chest like, you just proved my point there, not paying attention] Jimmy: [moves her finger down to his stomach shaking his head like he's so hungry and deprived of promised snacks that he can't possibly survive nevermind concentrate] Janis: [🙄 and poking his stomach harder, bit rude, 'come on then fatty' and wriggling out from under him, where she still is btw, gesturing like come on] Jimmy: [when you don't wanna leave this room and risk seeing either flat whites or her parents so you've got such a lil pout on 'shit host, you'] Janis: [a look like really 'lazy and all, chat shit about my rich girl work ethic ever again...' 😏 and goes to forage] Jimmy: [throws the pillow at her as she goes cos so mature] Janis: I'm taking all the good snacks now Jimmy: I'll have 'em off your 💀💀💀 body when you get 🔪🔪 Jimmy: bit of blood ain't gonna hurt nowt Janis: I've turned you Janis: not gay Janis: just vampire Janis: should've had your ear off and ended you there and then Jimmy: brb gotta send that tweet Jimmy: #notgayjustvampire Jimmy: what a read Janis: you would wanna be that couple Janis: not rawring at people with you Jimmy: I've got the fucking 💅 for it Janis: deny that you love it Jimmy: You really want me to throw my 💕 about tonight, eh? Janis: Not calling you a slag Janis: or am I Jimmy: can do Jimmy: be a misread but what ain't with you Janis: Doesn't feel like a #kinkunlocked to me Janis: and you're the one who claims he can't Jimmy: Claim I can't do loads of things but here we are Janis: Total opposite, bighead Janis: so rare you aren't bigging yourself up like the complex is so real Jimmy: you wish Jimmy: I get that it would be easier to fake this if I was more your type but 💔 Janis: You can't say I haven't faked it perfectly Janis: everyone believes it Jimmy: That weren't what I were saying Janis: What were you saying then, elaborate Jimmy: for a start that the locked door ain't the only appeal of a bathroom for your boyfriend Jimmy: 🎻 that every surface weren't mirrored Janis: 🙄 Why do you keep bringing him up Jimmy: Why don't you want me to? Janis: because I don't like thinking about him, never mind talking about him Janis: he's at a lot of parties, I'm sure you'll get a chance to see him again, like calm down Jimmy: It weren't me who wanted to 👀 that dickhead Janis: Me either, obviously Janis: well busy looking at myself, does that suit you? Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: What? Jimmy: What? Janis: What would you like me to say? That I love him? Or even fancy him? 'Cos I don't so I'm not going to just 'cos you need me to, for some reason Jimmy: Why would I need that? Janis: You tell me Jimmy: It's bollocks Janis: Then you can stop bringing him up Jimmy: I can do what I like, tah Janis: Alright, be obsessed with him Janis: I don't have to listen Jimmy: keep being a dickhead Jimmy: you obvs can't help it Janis: 🙄 Janis: good one Janis: I never said I weren't and I've done fuck all wrong Jimmy: 👍 Janis: fuck's sake Jimmy: I'm just gonna go Jimmy: They don't need to know I have Janis: Fine Jimmy: 👌 Janis: I'll get you a ride Jimmy: It's alright Janis: don't be stupid Jimmy: I said it's alright Janis: I got you out here, I can get you back too Jimmy: I can get myself back, I'm in no rush Janis: The buses have stopped coming out this way and you are miles from yours Janis: take the ride Jimmy: Leave it out Janis: Why are you being a dickhead for Jimmy: Me? Jimmy: Yeah, alright Janis: Yeah, you Janis: if you don't want the ride, then use my bed and wait 'til the AM Janis: you'll be left alone Jimmy: I don't want your bed either Janis: then take another one, this house is filled with fucking empty ones Jimmy: that's not creepy Janis: I have siblings that've fucked off Janis: that's all Janis: guest rooms are the reward for having lots of kids Jimmy: bit late for my dad to crack on there but I'll @ him any road Janis: never too late for blokes Jimmy: Northern 40s is rest of the world's 90s Janis: Still Jimmy: Still, he can't keep a bird for any length Jimmy: it's all stacking up Janis: you're gutted, clearly Janis: who doesn't want nine brothers and sisters Jimmy: Love raising his kids for him, me Jimmy: Why not do it a load more times? Got nowt else on Janis: After the 5th you can delegate Janis: your sister is definitely old enough Jimmy: Tah for the insider trading tips Janis: what are friends for Jimmy: Do you want a real or fake answer? Janis: why would you need to fake it Janis: not being wire-tapped here Jimmy: I might be wearing one 👮🚔 Janis: Her word is only law if you've not got the upper body strength or brain function to fight her off Janis: so go ahead Jimmy: You admitting I have? Janis: I'm admitting I'd know if you were working for or with Mia Janis: she's not as smart as she thinks and I'm not a fucking idiot Jimmy: And I ain't got enough upper body strength or brain function for that many jobs Jimmy: fucking hell Janis: You're exhausted just thinking about it Janis: relatable Jimmy: I'm sorry for bringing him up, alright? Janis: Alright Janis: I just don't get it Janis: like yeah it was a dick move but you don't reckon I was punished thoroughly enough or what? Jimmy: it's nowt like that Jimmy: I just Janis: Well it's alright, forget about it Jimmy: maybe I don't get it an' all Janis: Yeah Janis: I get that Jimmy: Do you? Janis: 'course Janis: much as it pains me to admit I don't know everything, like Jimmy: I won't send that tweet Janis: Cheers Jimmy: come back Janis: Okay Janis: [back with the snacks] Jimmy: [going through 'em so you don't have to look at her rn] Janis: ['Jimmy'] Jimmy: [raising his head like ?] Janis: ['I-' and stopping 'just-' and again, before settling on 'don't go and get lost, alright, I'd almost feel bad'] Jimmy: ['alright' and shoving her a controller for whatever console she has so they can play retro games and be competitive about it for a bit] Janis: [a mood] Jimmy: [as is throwing snacks into each other's mouths so simply must] Janis: [all the competitiveness] Jimmy: [speaking of I'm gonna do another hangman cos she guessed that one too fast for his liking, hold onto your hat bitch] Janis: [it was fun honey] Jimmy: [-- --- -- ---- ---- -- ---- - -------- --- -- ---] Janis: ['A'] Jimmy: [-- --- -- ---- ---- -- ---- a -------- -a- -- ---] Janis: ['Y'] Jimmy: [-- --- -y y--- ---- -- ---- a --a----y -ay -- ---] Janis: ['T'] Jimmy: [t- --- -y y--- ---- -- ---- a --a----y -ay t- ---] Janis: ['S'] Jimmy: [t- --- -y y--- s--- -s s--- a --a----y -ay t- ---] Janis: ['D'] Jimmy: [t- d-- -y y--- s-d- -s s--- a --a----y -ay t- d--] Janis: ['IE' 'cos we can sense a theme lol] Jimmy: [pout like how you gonna guess two letters bitch but we doing it] Jimmy: [t- die -y y--- -ide is s--- a -ea-e--- -ay t- die] Jimmy: [*side I can't type bye] Janis: [sings it at him] Jimmy: [when we know she's a good singer but he don't cos karaoke ain't happened yet so control your 😍 by drawing the hanged person but as 💔 Asia this time dropping a phone with a speech bubble of whatever bollocks they heard her boyfriend say] Janis: [draws him as a tadpole having a party in a pond with lady frogs and fishes] Jimmy: [lols] Janis: ['do you reckon I should feel bad about breaking them up?' shoving more snacks in her face, like] Jimmy: [when you give her such a wtf no look 'do they feel bad about wishing we would?' doesn't give her chance to answer cos obvs a rhetorical question 'there's your answer, like'] Janis: [shrugs like yeah, true 'but their love is so real' but rolls her eyes 'cos I doubt they were ever #goals] Jimmy: [shrugs back does a 💔 with his hands 'nowt I can't fix' and winks] Janis: [🙄] Jimmy: [goes to her window and opens it really wide to 🚬 leaning out dangerously far so he doesn't get any smoke in her room cos still doesn't wanna leave and see anyone] Janis: [comes to the window and looks out 'their car ain't back' like does that mean get out or] Jimmy: [gives her a look like oh no cali are coming for their 👑 by being so goals] Janis: [makes a face like don't] Jimmy: [goes to pass her the 🚬 like a peace offering but then is like oh you obvs don't want it my bad kinda takeback gesture cos what she said before about only faking it] Janis: [walks away 'cos stubborn] Jimmy: [just 🚬 and watching the 🐈s outside casually] Janis: [just back playing a solo game, pretending you ain't pouting] Jimmy: [sending her highlights of bathgate even though she's already seen them all cos shamelessly like pay attention to me] Janis: good thing we ain't in school Janis: last time they got this excited over a #scandal they put Jesy Halls in isolation for weeks Jimmy: You don't wanna be in isolation? Jimmy: fakest bollocks you've ever chatted Janis: You know they'd put you in and leave me out to get torn apart Janis: ⭐ Jimmy: what you get for being such an athlete Jimmy: and hey, might learn your name while I'm in there so it ain't all bad Janis: What you get for being so soft Janis: think of my mystique, would ya Jimmy: keep that to yourself, tah, it'll make us both look properly un-goals Janis: 🤢 Jimmy: Go on, might get to eat some snacks myself if you're struggling Janis: Fuck off Janis: I'm not encouraging you to talk about your dick so you can 🐽 Jimmy: you started it Janis: Nah Janis: why would I ever bring that up Jimmy: Why did you just? You tell me, girl Janis: 😒 Janis: you're so annoying Jimmy: You're easy to annoy Janis: I think you'll find most sane people don't wanna discuss your genitals Janis: just them downstairs Jimmy: 💔 Janis: you're buzzing Janis: be sneaking down in a few Jimmy: busted me Janis: mhmm Janis: wouldn't be a good real cheat, you Jimmy: my dad's got that covered Jimmy: I don't want 🥈 Janis: fair enough Janis: Freud's all over that statement Jimmy: he can be next for a 👻🥊 Janis: this is what comes of violent games Janis: [throws a bag of snack at him] Jimmy: [catches it like 😏] Janis: [pouts] Jimmy: 💪🏆 Janis: are you nearly done Janis: freezing here Janis: [in your short shorts] Jimmy: [wasn't done but gets done immediately cos #whipped] Janis: [gets under the covers] Jimmy: [comes over and tucks her in like a nerd] Janis: [allows this to happen like you're gonna go sleep 😊] Jimmy: [just sitting on the edge of the bed like when you tell a kid a story] Janis: ['you do this a lot, like'] Jimmy: [looks at her like what?] Janis: [looks down like tucking in] Jimmy: [shrugs like it's so casual cos she knows he's got a little brother from the pool awks] Janis: ['never stop, eh'] Jimmy: [looks at his phone cos still blowing up and back at her like so many jobs so little time] Janis: [tugs on his sleeve gently like lay down 'they'll be consoling her for hours still yet'] Jimmy: [does of course] Janis: ['you want me to go?' quiet and soft like he's asleep already 'I do have 2 cigarettes to smoke now so'] Jimmy: ['do you wanna go?' because can't answer a q but also obvs does not want that but thinks she does] Janis: [shrugs 'cos like no but do you want me to lol, so helpful] Jimmy: ['it's your bed' and what boy you're not helpful either] Janis: ['you want a tour of all the free ones?'] Jimmy: ['Which one's most worth haunting?'] Janis: [a look like that's easy but then a 🤔 face 'but you're pretty chicken so' and rolling over like night then] Jimmy: [shoves her like oi] Janis: [loling 'don't push me out of bed, how ungoals, you twat'] Jimmy: [literally rolls her back over to face him #excuse you 'answer me, dickhead'] Janis: [when that was hot so you're like literally give me a moment here so you wriggle down under the covers so he can't see you 'alright, I'll show you but I can't promise the ghost will come out' muffled by the duvet like hello] Jimmy: [lifts the covers up and peeping at her like ? and has cupped his ear like what? because one ear jokes 5ever] Janis: [coming out the bottom of the bed like can't catch me 'come on scaredy cat' and we all know what room we going to] Jimmy: [can't catch her ever but can chuck a hoodie at her because she's so cold and it might slow her down a bit] Janis: [puts it on and pretend swoons 'trying to cash in some hero points now, I see'] Jimmy: ['just don't want you to freeze to death before we get there, Jennifer, can't be arsed with throwing myself down the stairs right this second'] Janis: [pouts and grabs his face like n'awh 'but we could frame them, where's your sense of fun, honestly'] Jimmy: [pushes her off but then is like 😏 looking at her like good idea and picks her up as if he's gonna chuck her down the stairs] Janis: [playfighting like get off me boy 'as if I'd let you go 2nd'] Jimmy: [we love a playfight moment 'as if you reckon you call the shots'] Janis: [the most dramatic 'pfft!' and just rolling further towards the stairs like actually be careful please 'but you love coming first usually'] Jimmy: [does a mime locking his lips like don't tell anyone that, very ungoals, boy stop making it sexual again thank you 'depends, time and a place, you know, Jules'] Janis: [rolls her eyes but is 😳 'How can I trust you'll go through with it, besides, Romeo dies first, I fake it, you do it for real, then I do, stick to the script'] Jimmy: ['fake something for me that convincingly and I might do'] Janis: [just looking at him 'rude'] Jimmy: [a LOOK back at her] Janis: ['you can't tell me those pictures weren't convincing' 'cos we know it's still popping off] Jimmy: ['I sorted them' okay boy we gonna act like just cos you did all the camera shit she didn't do anything? Really now] Janis: ['it was my idea, and you wouldn't have any pictures on your own so'] Jimmy: [a shrug but we all know he's still looking at her, like oh jimothy what kind of challenge do you think you can lay down right here right now that'll top bathgate you simply can't] Janis: ['so, it's your turn to think of something, actually' but getting up and going to Edie's room, which is thankfully not a creepy shrine moment] Jimmy: [Follows her obvs] Janis: [it's probably less of a guest room more of a quiet chill room for if they wanted to go think about her, that seems like some hippie shit, so obviously no one goes in here though 'cos no thanks lol, gestures like 'this is the ghost room, can you feel it?' so sarky] Jimmy: [just making himself comfy in there because he don't know] Janis: [when this was a bad idea but you have to front it out and sit down like] Jimmy: [when you're so busy trying to think of something to top bathgate that you're oblivious] Janis: [at least you can lean in to pressuring him just making tick tock noises with your tongue like] Jimmy: [he'd do such a fake OMG STOP like when she was being tickled in front of the fans] Janis: [just gets closer to the ear she didn't bite so it's louder] Jimmy: [when you wanna lol but you don't wanna give her the satisfaction so you gotta bite your lip like it's okay I'm just thinking here, total accident that he looks really hot doing it soz Janis] Janis: [just shamelessly looking 'not meant to eat yourself, such a rookie' 😏] Jimmy: ['if anyone can recognise owt like that, it'd be you'] Janis: ['duh, I turned you, I'm like your mistress' raises brows 'or daddy, if you prefer'] Jimmy: ['Don't be telling my missus I've got one of them, tah, right rookie mistake that'd be, she already reckons me and her are well fake' does a what can you do, women eh, kinda gesture]] Janis: ['I don't reckon she knows you've got a name' shakes head like imagine that 'enjoy being on the other side of that one, babe'] Jimmy: [😏 'Sounds alright to me, that'] Janis: [🙄 but not that mad ever] Jimmy: [zips up the hoodie for her like how you possibly be annoyed at such a 😇] Janis: [pulls is back down justto be that bitch but then you look like you wanna be undressed in front of him so you pull it up and down a few times like a bit] Jimmy: ['you break it, you've bought it, rich girl' but clearly amused] Janis: [shrugs 'meant to let me keep it anyway'] Jimmy: ['You want me to freeze to death, that's the big plan, eh?' cos she'd have the school trip one already] Janis: [nods but is lol 'how else will everyone know you love me?'] Jimmy: [100% has to give her a new lovebite because I can't not if you're gonna say stuff like that Janis] Janis: [just like 'of course' but with feeling 'cos always covered low-key and we know it 'what about you, what do you want?'] Jimmy: [when you give her another one because that's what you want and we all know it but then you have to look at her like ? as if you weren't listening] Janis: [just gripping the sofa you're on so tightly so you can otherwise pretend this is so casual, tracing your finger 'round and 'round his ear lobe like 'yours healed ages ago...'] Jimmy: ['Have another go then' yeah this is so casual bye] Janis: [does, with vigour lol] Jimmy: [his turn to abuse the sofa] Janis: [admiring your handiwork 'bruises don't lie' and giving him back the hoodie like there you go] Jimmy: ['No need for you to lie either' cos she was cold and putting it back on her because I love a hair lift moment especially because he won't jump back 6 ft like when he did that exact thing on school trip #progress] Janis: [the state of the hair after all this we can only assume, going to put it up or something like ugh 'I don't lie, ever' fully aware of the irony ;cos of their fake dating deal like 😇] Jimmy: [irl 👌 so sarky] Janis: [lols] Jimmy: [when she's so cute and you can see so much of her neck now she's moved her hair and you're just like don't 😳] Janis: [motioning for him to pass her a cigarette and getting up 'ghost ain't coming, soz mate' 'cos definitely needs it now] Jimmy: [puts one behind her ear cos can't be tamed about touching her needlessly ever] Janis: ['you want my second one? as I don't smoke' as she's going to go downstairs] Jimmy: [takes one for himself as an unspoken yes] Janis: [kinda wanna make cali come back to be evil[ Jimmy: [do it gal] Janis: [they'll just say hi but she'll be fuming lol] Jimmy: [and he'll be wanting to run away] Janis: [at least its dark so you can sit here bright red, angrily smoking in silence] Jimmy: I'll fuck off home, say the word Janis: You can Janis: they won't wake you up for breakfast and awkward small talk though Jimmy: That where you get being a shit host from? Janis: Funny Jimmy: Could at least fake 😂 for me then, babe Janis: [😑 at him] Janis: convincing, yeah? Jimmy: 🥇 Janis: don't give me pity medals Jimmy: Alright Jimmy: have another go Janis: [a look that's half a LOOK and half don't] Janis: lost track of time, didn't reckon they'd be back 🤷 Janis: they couldn't see you so it don't count as meeting, right Jimmy: no 👻 about tonight Janis: yeah Janis: go if you have to Jimmy: I'll go if you want me to Janis: [say Cali's room also faces the front, nodding to the windows] Janis: go in once their light is on Jimmy: 👍 Janis: hope one of 'em has been sick or something Janis: doubt it'll be as pretty and pink coming back up Jimmy: [when we know that'll make him feel sick but not gonna see the greenish tint in the dark so stay 💪 boy and throw a stone at Grace's window to see if there's any life in there] Janis: 🙄 oh great Janis: give 'em ideas, lover boy Jimmy: I can't help missing her, alright? Jimmy: [dramatically fake pining] Janis: Disgusting Janis: [but a small half-smile Jimmy: [nudges her gently like hey that's at least a small 🏆] Janis: [nudes him like piss off but it's as gently] Jimmy: [just staying leaned into her a lil bit like be comforted] Janis: Proper soft, you Janis: could make yourself useful and find some fuel so I can set the place on fire whilst all my worst enemies are inside Jimmy: can't stop lying, you Jimmy: I'm well hard, me Jimmy: [plucks at the hoodie she's wearing like this is so cheap it'll burn right up] Janis: [looks down like hmm 🤔] Janis: you give to take away, only just got this hoodie back Jimmy: [nods at a passing cat like there you go instead then] Janis: [snorts] Jimmy: I were thinking Jimmy: it's not about arson but Janis: disappointing Janis: but go on Jimmy: could've waited til you'd heard it to 💔 me Janis: tell me Jimmy: I dunno, just Jimmy: might not be the massive-stly shit idea to try and be mates Jimmy: for as long as I'm here and this Janis: Wait, are you friendzoning me, Taylor? 😂 Janis: [actually 😂] Jimmy: [is pouting actually] Janis: [pats his shoulder like my bad] Janis: Sorry, that's just not what I expected you to say Jimmy: I've changed my mind now, dickhead Janis: Probably for the best Janis: if you can't handle that, like Janis: insert that quote here Jimmy: weren't likely to handle nowt for long but you're alright Janis: I don't need mates and you don't want me as one Jimmy: 👌 Janis: Let's go in then Jimmy: [does] Janis: [stops off in the kitchen to get more drink first] Jimmy: [does not follow her for the first time ever] Janis: don't you want a nightcap? Jimmy: Is it a) pretty or b) pink? Janis: That's long gone, boy Jimmy: So what's the point, like? Janis: You know I've seen you drink drinks that aren't flat white approved before, yeah? Jimmy: Don't sound like me or very #goals to me Janis: I'll leave the bottle here then 👌 Jimmy: 👍 Janis: Don't be in a mood Jimmy: Or what? You'll be in a bigger one? Janis: I'm not in a mood Jimmy: nowt to worry about then, is there? Janis: Why are you in one? Jimmy: What are you on about? Jimmy: Stick to the script, Jodie, we've got no rules but that Janis: Suit yourself Jimmy: tah for stating the obvious Jimmy: it were like Asia was here for a bit Janis: How lovely for you Jimmy: 💕 Janis: Fuck sake Janis: you can't give me any time to react, no Jimmy: you can have loads, we're off the clock Janis: Bullshit Jimmy: nah Janis: Yeah Janis: I said I didn't know you were gonna say that Jimmy: like you said an' all, bad idea Jimmy: we can leave it out Janis: right, cheers Jimmy: you're right, take the 🏆 Janis: Leave it out, like you said Jimmy: lasses first Janis: Whatever Janis: this is ridiculous Jimmy: nowt about any of this has ever been owt else Janis: No need to tell me Jimmy: you're trying to tell me Janis: I'm trying to tell you fuck all Janis: what's the point Jimmy: 🙀 Janis: I'm not the one that's scared Janis: or taking back what I said Jimmy: Piss off Jimmy: I'm taking it back 'cause you're a knobhead Janis: You knew that before you said it Jimmy: you weren't for a second so I said it Janis: What second? Jimmy: What does that matter? Janis: Maybe I would like to try again, or maybe I wanna know what to avoid Janis: take your pick Jimmy: Maybe you're right again and I'm soft Jimmy: take your 🏆 Janis: Bollocks, that's giving yourself one for nothing Janis: like you've been so nice to me even though I don't deserve it, fuck off Jimmy: you fuck off Jimmy: I'm tired Janis: go sleep then Jimmy: Alright Janis: Night Jimmy: 👍 Janis: [just downstairs, getting drunk] Jimmy: [I'm so evil because I'm like ooh the potential for her to come up here when she is] Janis: ['forget' he's in your room like bonjour] Jimmy: [exactly though] Janis: [why not baby] Jimmy: [him just half asleep like mother is that you returning from the great unknown, oh no wait I'm not at home remotely] Janis: [ah the confusion, poor boy] Jimmy: [when you're relieved that it's her for the hottest of secs because where you been girl but also not because awkward] Janis: [when he's on the side of the bed you sleep on so you're trying to get in like 'budge up'] Jimmy: [so offended before he realises how drunk she is but then also like shhh when he does realise as if anyone's gonna hear this jimothy calm down] Janis: [just pushing him but much less efficiently than normal 'least you've warmed it for me'] Jimmy: [just so 😒 like stop pushing me but not saying anything] Janis: ['are you still cross?'] Jimmy: ['I've got nowt to be mardy about' sighing at himself like ffs boy as he's scooting over #foreverwhipped] Janis: [chuckling to herself, quietly, thank god, as she settles in 'well I'm not happy with you'] Jimmy: ['And I've done nowt for you to be mardy at me about' okay Jimothy if you say so] Janis: ['Neither of those is true, you know' fluffing up the pillow] Jimmy: ['start a # if you feel so strongly' cos v mature] Janis: ['you're stupid, stupid as I am' poking him] Jimmy: [gives her a look like don't, which he means on many levels rn] Janis: [pulls a face 'cos so mature too right now 'we could be friends, I'm just saying'] Jimmy: ['You reckon?' because clearly they can't] Janis: ['duh'] Jimmy: [shakes his head] Janis: [nods, way too hard, 'now you made me dizzy as well'] Jimmy: [goes to sarcastically pat her on the head like there there but strokes her hair instead because so soft always] Janis: [pouts but genuinely] Jimmy: ['what?' but in the softest way] Janis: ['I want you to be my friend but I weren't lying when I said you wouldn't want me to be your friend but I still wish you would'] Jimmy: [needlessly moves her hair out of her face like look at me 'it ain't up to you what I want, I said I wanted to try 'cause I did- I do'] Janis: [Hides under the covers again like sorry can't look at you 'okay' really quietly] Jimmy: [reaches under the covers so he can trace a o and k with his fingertip on her hand/arm whichever is reachable] Janis: [comes back up 'go sleep now' and closes his eyes with her fingers] Jimmy: [such an amused little noise because he was asleep before she came in, excuse you] Janis: ['shh shh'] Jimmy: [puts a finger on her lips like you shh] Janis: [frowny face 'stop it'] Jimmy: [holds his hands up dramatically like alright, calm down and gets comfy like look I'mma sleep] Janis: [smug face like that's right and does the same 'least it's not a single this time'] Jimmy: ['gutted, me' said really sarcastically but we know you are boy] Janis: [gets all up in his grill like there you go then] Jimmy: ['funny'] Janis: ['that's what you get for being rude'] Jimmy: ['you woke me, pisshead' but affectionately not actually annoyed at all] Janis: [waves hand like psh 'you were rude before then'] Jimmy: ['Alright, shut up' like you really care about going back to sleep rn okay Jimothy] Janis: [gestures like see 'gotta be nice to me' but rolling over like okay, you can sleep] Jimmy: [OTT dramatic sigh so she's knows it's fake] Janis: ['bet you can't say one nice thing about me'] Jimmy: ['you're not as shit at kissing as you were on the trip' because I re-read that and he kept acting like she was so bad like OKAY liar] Janis: [pushes him 'what kind of compliment is that?!'] Jimmy: [shrugs like you don't know exactly what you're doing boy] Janis: ['alright then the only thing I have to say about you is you're slightly less shit at being nice but potentially worse at lying so' blows raspberry] Jimmy: ['bollocks, you've got loads to say tonight, lightweight' but he's loling] Janis: ['yes well I've been very bored'] Jimmy: [does like the awh cheek squish she does to him always 'poor baby'] Janis: ['you know I'll bite you' squirming out of reach 'why didn't you come down?'] Jimmy: [does the thing where you check an animals teeth like he wants to see her vampire fangs, stop touching her mouth please! 'Why didn't you come up?'] Janis: [wipes her mouth like a child like gross 'I was getting drunk' shrugs like hello] Jimmy: [shrugs back 'I were sleeping' but like not for ages boy we know it] Janis: ['marding' in a him impersonation Jimmy: [pushes her cos oi what a read] Janis: [mhmm noise 'me too, but I had company'] Jimmy: ['like I said, shit host'] Janis: ['what do you mean?' resting on her elbow 'you keep saying that'] Jimmy: [just giving her a look like pretty self explanatory] Janis: [a look like obvs not? 'I've fed you, entertained you, what more do you want, fanfare?'] Jimmy: ['that lot did the did the bulk of the entertaining, girl, weren't you' more lies and more slander] Janis: ['not my fault you've got shit taste then' is pouting] Jimmy: ['@whateverAsia'ssocials are, might start her off bawling again, what could be more goals?'] Jimmy: [but obvs he's said them I just cba to think of one lol] Janis: ['kink unlocked you horrible boy' but lols] Jimmy: [I've known for ages that were one of yours'] Janis: ['making girls cry?' fake ponders 'hmm, don't tell anyone'] Jimmy: ['not just lasses' does the broken heart hand thing again] Janis: ['you aren't that soft' nudges him 'unfortunately'] Jimmy: [nudges her back 'bit of editing and you can tweet that'] Janis: [passes her phone 'you'll have to do it for me, I'm not that drunk and sad'] Jimmy: [tweets something hilarious instead cos that bitch and makes a big show of not giving her the phone back cos drunk] Janis: ['what did you do, tweet my nudes?' tryna grab her phone like 'scuse me] Jimmy: ['Mr Lucas wishes' having a playfight over this phone so casually] Janis: ['who do you think I'm taking them for' then an ew face 'cos truly] Jimmy: ['Save something for the wedding night' cos in the school trip convo that was also a running theme of her marrying him lol] Janis: ['tweet that and we lose all credibility'] Jimmy: [shakes his head 'I could make owt sound goals, even that bollocks'] Janis: ['yeah but bit off message' gestures at the lovebites 'stick to the script, no improv'] Jimmy: [touches the newest ones he gave her, boy stop 'Alright'] Janis: [shakes her head 'don't' and pulls up the covers between them] Jimmy: [when you're actually 💔 now, so just getting back in a sleeping position] Janis: ['it's just 'cos I wanna and it's not fair and' let this be vaguely incoherent so you don't fully out yourself immediately] Jimmy: [just pretending he's actually gone deaf like we don't need to do this] Janis: [sad sound but turning over like you actually believe he's asleep] Jimmy: [just moving about like you're trying to get more comfy but getting closer to her so it's like the in bed version of when he was leaning on her earlier] Janis: [just really quiet and still for a long time, sighs 'night, Jimmy'] Jimmy: [we know he ain't gonna answer even though he all also know you aren't asleep sir] Janis: [AM skip or?] Jimmy: [I think we should say he leaves like super early cos got so real there] Janis: [okay gurl]

1 note · View note

queenofangrymoths · 5 years ago

Text

The Invitation - Final Draft

I wrote this for a grade. Enjoy. Beth is owned by @allthenewsiesaregay-bitch

The invitation sat on the kitchen table for about an hour. Ash was staring at it when Beth came back from a late shift. “Hey - uh, why are you creepily staring at an envelope?” Ash turned her gaze on Beth, her eyes narrowed as she seemed to be thinking something over. “That doesn’t mean look at me creepily.”

“My sister is getting married.” the sentence rolled off Ash’s tongue. It was a good thing, Jessica planned her wedding a long time ago. It was about time she got married, she’d been dating Cindy for what, five years? Six? Time was starting to blur together for her.

“That’s nice...so what’s the problem?” Beth grabbed a beer out of the fridge.

Ash rubbed her face, frustrated. “I told my family I was dating someone. Just to get them off my back but she’s sent two tickets.”

“So you want me to save you from your mess.” Beth cracked open the beer, lifting the bottle to her lips.

“Mama kept asking when I was going to get married....” Ash pinches the bridge of her nose, breathing in deep. “She means well but I got frustrated. So yeah, I made one up, sue me. Are you going to help me or not?” It came out as a growl, something that only happened if Ash was really frustrated.

“Sure.” Beth took a swing. Ash leaned back in her chair, sighing in relief “Isn’t your family like super catholic thought? How are you going to get around the whole church thing?”

“She’s not getting married in a church,” Standing, Ash got herself a beer.

“Why not?”

“Cuz they’re lesbians, Harold,” She took a long swing. She and Jess were the rainbow sheep of the family. Ash came out by attending the Second National March on Washington for Lesbian and Gay Rights in 1987 and getting caught on camera. Jessica came out in the 2000s. No church wedding for either of them. It might bum Jess out but with Ash’s vampirism, that was just fine.

“That fucking sucks.”

Ash shrugged. “It was never in our cards,” they drank their beers in silence. “Thanks.”

“Your welcome.” The following week was filled with preparation for the trip to LA. Ash went dress shopping. She assumed Beth got a suit or something. Vacation days were used to cover the two three day trip. “Hey, babe?”

Ash stopped packing for a split second, blinking from the shock. Did she…? She went out to the living room. “Did you just...call me babe?” Beth was filling out some paperwork, Ash was pretty sure it was about making Draco her emotional support snake.

“Yeah? I figured we’d start using the pet names so it’ll sound natural,” Beth scribbled on a piece of scrap paper, grumbling as no ink came out. “Do you have a pen I can borrow?”

“Give me a sec -” she went into her room, grabbed a pen, and handed it to her. “Here you go..uh, honey,” a blush creped on her ashen cheeks. Get it together, idiot! She reprimanded herself.

Beth wrinkled her nose. “Don’t call me that.”

“Then what do I call you?”

Holding up three fingers, Beth counted them off. “Stars, lover, and darling.”

“You got Lover from Hadestown, didn’t you, lover?” It felt strange - calling Beth ‘lover’ but it wasn’t a bad strange. She liked it, maybe a little too much but she shoved the feeling down.

“Maybe,” Ash laughed, heading back to her room. After a couple days of practice, the pet names slide off both of their tongues with ease. The day had arrived. The bags were packed, there was only one last thing to do before they could head to the airport. “Okay, Draco, you’re going to have to be brave, okay?” Beth stroked his scales as Ash held the sack open. “Babe, give him a boop of good luck.”

“Darling, just put him in the sack.” Really, if they could keep Draco in the cabin - they would. Unfortunately, that was against regulations. Draco would be traveling in a sack in a box, labeled LIVE ANIMAL - SNAKE.

“Give him a boop of good luck, babe.” Beth repeated, determined

“Jesus…” Ash sighed and dropped the sack down. Gently, she booped the ball python’s snout. Draco flickered his tongue, continuing to make heart eyes at Ash. “Now, lover put him in the sack.”

Beth sighed and muttered some encouragement to Draco. Finally, she placed him gently in the sack. After tying it shut, Ash put him in the box and sealed it up. “He’s going to be fine,” Ash told Beth as she put her seatbelt on in the Broom, Beth’s car.

“Yeah. I know.” Beth drove them to the Airport, as they arrived, Ash shuttered.

Airports. Ash hated airports. Before 9/11, it was so easy. Now it was hell. Beth was uncomfortable and Ash was mildly annoyed. Luckily, she didn’t snap and bite a TSA agent. “Should I ask how the fuck your sister afford first class?” Beth was gently stroking the armchairs, surprised how comfortable they were

“She does the books for some rich companies. They pay her good,” Ash and Jes both could do math. They were too powerful but luckily, only one of them was alive.

“Are you sure she doesn’t embezzle?”

“If she does then good for her.” Ash adjusted her hat. Her sister knew about her...condition, Ash noticed small details about how much thought her sister put into this. They were flying at night, it would be dark in LA when they arrived, and her sister’s wedding ceremony was after sunset. All to make sure Ash wouldn’t die.

The flight went smoothly. When they landed in LA, three hours and fifty minutes later, Beth was eager to get her familiar back. “Walk - walk! Star, you’re going to run into someone!” Ash ran after Beth- her fake girlfriend rushing to the baggage pick up. Miraculously, no one was run over.

“Where is he, where is he?” Beth mumbled as Ash caught her breath next to her. When his box slides down the baggage carousel, Beth rushed forward to grab the box. Ash, on the other hand, went for their luggage. “Got him!” A big grin spread across Beth’s face.

Aw shit, she’s cute. Get it together Ash.“That’s great, lover, let's get out of here,” Airports were always so much nicer when you were leaving. Out on the sidewalk with traffic racing by them, Ash whistle down a cab. Eventually, a cab stopped and they rushed forward. When Beth shoved the bags in the trunk, Ash popped in and told the guy the address of the hotel. “Isn’t this your first time in LA?”

“Yeah.” Beth was looking out the tinted window.

“Do you want to go sightseeing?” It was a couple years since Ash was in the city but Ash knew the city like the back of her hand. Say no, She was tired, in a desperate need for a nap.

“Nah.” Ash sighed with relief, setting into mild silence. When they arrived, Beth paid the cabbie “Keep the change,” They got the bags and Beth stared at the hotel “Your sister is rich, isn’t she.”

“I don’t know” They walked into the hotel, Ash making a beeline to the desk. “I have a reservation for Ash Carissima Lucy Vecellio, made by Jessica Vedattie Agatha Vecellio?” Ash put on her best smile. The clerk continued to type at the computer looking up their reservation.

“Why four fucking names?” Beth muttered but Ash ignored her

“Can I see your ID?” asked the clerk. Ash whipped out her driver's license - the new one, forged with an appropriate birth year and handed it to the clerk. If she carried around her old one, no one believed she was actually sixty-two when she doesn’t look a day over twenty-three.

The clerk checked it over then handed it back “Everything seems to order. Here are your keys. Room 721 on the seventh floor,” The woman handed them two thin cards. “Have a nice evening,”

“Have a nice evening,” Ash repeated, dragging her suitcase to the elevator.

“Really, why four names?” Beth asked again.

Ash pushed the button then hit the >< buttons, making the doors close.“It’s a catholic thing.” Really everything from the first 23 years of her life was a catholic thing. “When someone is confirmed, they take the name of a saint. I picked Saint Lucy.”

“The saint of….?”

“The blind. Our church had a statue of her, it was pretty rad.”

“Please never say that ever again.” Before Ash could retort, the elevator shuddered to a stop and opened its grey doors. Out they went, searching for their room. “This is it.” Beth unlocked the door and walked in. It was a nice room, comfortable enough and then Ash walked into the bedroom

“There are two beds!!”Ash screeched, surprised. Two king-sized beds, cloaked in white sheets stood before her. Beth didn’t respond, she was too busy opening up Draco’s box and releasing the snake.

“Hey, buddy! How was your flight?” Draco poked out of the sack and flickered his tongue.

Ash picked her bed, the right, and pulled her suitcase on top of it. “Alright, lover, we’re here for two days. Tomorrow is the wedding and on Sunday, we fly back home.”

“Sounds good. Your family knows you’re a vamp, right?” Beth scooped up Draco, placing him on her neck and hauled her suitcase on her bed. She opened it, tossing her grimoire on the bed. No witch left home without hers- Beth was no exception.

“The immediate family does,” Ash rushed to the closet to hang up her dress, hiding it from view before Beth could see. “Let’s keep it a secret, what we’re wearing,” They made a deal back in Chicago. Best to keep it a surprise, it made Ash smile. “The rest were told I developed a skin condition and a garlic allergy.”

“Mhm.” Upon finishing unpacking, Ash opened a shampoo bottle and drank straight from it, her teeth stained red. “Blood in a shampoo bottle. Smart.”

“When I moved to Chicago, it was so easy. No one questioned why I had so many water bottles.” She wiped her mouth, not one drop of red on her clothes or sheets. Her eyes brightened once she drank.

Beth looked at a clock. 10:55 glared back in white block letters. “You staying up, babe?”

Ash dug out her pajama shirt from her suitcase, pulling off her shirt. She shook her head, working to unclasp her bra. If this sounds descriptive this is because Beth didn’t, no that’s the wrong word, couldn’t stop watching her. Ash stretched her hands to the sky, her eyes shut.. “No,” she took her time in putting on the old dress shirt, leaving the last three buttons unbuttoned. “Shouldn’t you be setting up Draco’s terrarium, not looking at my tits, Lover?”

“Fuck you.” Ash’s laugh followed Beth out of the room. She was asleep by the time Beth came back in the room, not even stirring as Beth undressed and climbed into her bed. She turned off the lights, the room engulfed in darkness. The only sounds were Ash’s soft breathing, Beth fell asleep pretty quickly.

The first half of the day was calm. Beth woke up to see Ash changing into a casual outfit, to which she quickly closed her eyes. Nope, nope, don’t be a peeping Tom. “It’s about time you woke up,” Ash clipped her bra then slipped into the bathroom.

“How did you know I’m awake?” Beth sat up, rubbing her eyes

Ash replied while brushing her teeth, her words bubbled and barely understandable. “Your heartbeat spiked!”

“Oh...so when is the wedding??” Ash walked out, standing before her in sweats and a loose tank top. “It starts at nine and the reception should end somewhere around midnight or later. We should be there by eight-thirty.”

Beth checked the clock on her bedside, it read 11:50. “We got what, eight hours to kill? What are we going to do?”

“I’m going to get some breakfast. Want to join me, lover?” Was there any way to say no to that smile? Beth didn’t think so as she nodded and got out of bed. After a nice breakfast, they chilled in their room. The fake couple watched several movies with Draco coiled around Beth’s neck. It was after five that things got hectic. A chaotic mess of getting ready, making sure they knew where the garden was, then the waiting game. It wasn’t until sundown after all.

“Hey, are you done yet?” Beth drummed her fingers on her top hat. Getting into a suit was easier than trying to zip up a dress herself and she’d heard Ash stumble and curse several times since she left to change in the living room.

“Just- just get in here and help me!” Ash hissed, her fingers clawing at her back in an attempt to zipper up the back. Beth set her hat on the coffee, walking into the bedroom. Ash was wandering around, most of her outfit complete with makeup and heels on. With three-inch heels, Ash made the height difference between them from three inches to a solid five inches, standing at a solid 6’.

“Hold still.” Ash huffed and folded her arms across her chest. Beth stood on her tippy toes as she zipped up the dress. “Why wear heels- you’re 5 '8,” she grumbled.

“Jealous, lover?” Ash smirked

Beth rolled her eyes then hooked the dress up. “You wish. There, you’re good. You finished?” She checked her watch, they had an hour to walk to the garden and find good seats.

“Give me one sec,” Ash walked to the dresser and picked up one of her perfume bottle. She spritzed some of it on her neck, rubbing it in. “C’mere, lover,” she walked over to Beth and before she could protest - she was hit with a squirt of perfume. “There, we match~” Ash purred, showing her fangs. “You can look now.”

To put it simply, Ash’s dress was gorgeous. Black, of course, sleeveless, and covered in an assortment of flowers giving it shy pops of color. Hands covered by black gloves, if not for her pentagram scars on her left palm, she wouldn’t be wearing them. Her make up was simple, just blush and dark red lipstick. Her dark locks swept over her shoulders. She was gorgeous- Beth considered herself lucky she didn’t blush. “You look great, babe,”

“Darling, who gave you the right to steal Cara Delevingne’s look?” Ash muttered as she straightened Beth’s silver tie. Honestly, Beth needed to wear more suits because damn did she look good. Ash was biting the inside of her mouth to make sure she didn’t say something she’d regret.

“Who says she didn’t steal it from me?” Ash giggled, letting go of Beth’s silver tie. “We should go,”

“We should,” Ash took her fake girlfriend’s arm as they left. “You have one of the hotel keys, right?” Beth responded by patting on her breast pocket. “Good,” then they walked hand in hand to the garden, found good seats, and waited. It was a beautiful wedding, really. Ash cried at least once, using provided tissues to cover her face as she cried blood.

“Okay, this is the hard party,” Ash sniffled as they walked into the reception. “My family is going to mostly ignore us, seeing how it’s not my wedding but Mama is going to hound us for maybe twenty minutes?”

“Do you not...like your mother?” Beth asked, her tone certainly conveyed she might not.

“No, dummy, I just don’t want to get caught.” Ash hissed.

There wasn’t much time between the little exchange between the fake lovers before a yell shattered the villa. “Topolino!!!” an old woman yelled in joy as she rushed towards them, drawing Ash into a big hug. Ash squealed with delight and hugged her back. “My darling girl, you are too thin! Have you been eating enough?” If not for the dynamic between the two women, Beth knew this was Ash’s mother by how they looked alike- her mother was aged, smaller, and round Ash.

“Mama, you know I have, I just miss your cooking!” Ash giggled. The two finally let go of each other and Ash stepped towards Beth, putting an arm around her. “Mama, this is my girlfriend - Beth,” She announced with a smile.

Beth tipped her hat towards Ash’s mother, smiling at her. “Hello, Ma’am,”

Ash’s mother frowned at her. Anna Vani Cecilia Velicello had seen all of Ash’s affairs, the good and the bad. In a short minute, she seized up Beth and Ash, seeing how they held each other. Her daughter seemed so happy holding this woman’s arm and the girl did look harmless. “Are you treating my Ashely well, Beth?”

Ash covered her face, faking shock. “Mama, do you not trust my judgment?!” “Frankly, no, dear.” her mother answered flatly. Ash frowned but it was fair. She had picked several bad choices in who she dated. Now her mother turned her death glare at Beth, waiting for her answer.

“How else am I supposed to treat her, Ma’am?” Beth smiled, being honest as she could be, her pinning heart winning over her mouth.

After a tense moment, Ash’s mother relaxed, a massive worry seeming to be lifted from her shoulders. “Welcome to the family, Beth,” she reached up and patted her cheek. “Enjoy the party! Anthony, stop eating the cookies, you maiale!” then she was gone.

“Your name isn’t a cool pun on your vampirism?????” Beth whispered as they slipped into the crowds, Ash waving to relatives as they went. Her cheeks were already aching from all of the smiling.

“Shut the fuck up, Bethany.” she hissed.

It was later during the reception Beth learned how well Ash could hold her liquor. Not at all. Ashley Carissima Lucy Velcellio was a lightweight. “You’re telling me you are sixty-two years old and a lightweight?” Beth was from the deep south where she had her first beer at thirteen.

Ash giggled, her cheeks red before she covered them. “Yep!” What a troublemaker a drunken vampire could be, the most interesting incident went like this, “I’m not scoopable.” she muttered into her glass. At this point, she was as drunk as a skunk.

“You’re not what?” Beth set her glass on the bar.

“Scoopable. I tend to date people who are shorter than me but dammit, I just want to be held in someone's arms but I’m just not-” she hiccuped, “scoopable.”

“Yes, yes you are,” Beth was standing as Ash scrunched up her face in confusion.

“I’m pretty sure I’m not- oh! Oh!” She squeaked as Beth scooped her up, holding her fine in her arms.

“You ARE scoopable!” Beth declared, watching Ash threw back her head in a full laugh - her fangs on display, glittering in the lights.

“Okay, okay, lover! You’ve proven your point!” Ash giggled. She giggled a lot when she was drunk, Beth noticed. Ash’s cheeks were red, sometimes she slurred her words, and her face was always dangerously close to Beth’s.

“I like keeping you in my arms, we’re finally level.” Ash giggled again. “You’re kind of cute from up here,” it was the last thing Beth got out of her mouth before Ash did the unthinkable - She kissed Beth.

And Beth kissed her back.

“Gods, I’ve been wanting to do that since...like forever,” Ash said with a giggled when they pulled away, licking her lips. She tastes like beer. Normally, she’d be disgusted but right now, she didn’t care.

“You taste like vodka,” was all Beth could say, her brain short-circuited.

“Well excuse me - you don’t taste much better!” But it didn’t stop her from kissing her again. “Pinning sucks, I like kissing better,” Ash against her lips.

“Let’s stop pinning and just kiss,”

“Deal,” Ash giggled and kissed her again but then she stopped. Someone screamed the bouquets were going to be thrown. “Oh! Put me down! Put me down, lover girl!” Beth complied. Ash grabbed her hand, dragging her in the directions of the scream. “Come on, one of us gotta catch it, right?” Ash laughed, drunk and high on Beth’s kisses.

Ash didn’t remember Beth carrying her back to the hotel - her sister’s bouquet of roses and calla lilies clenched tightly in her hand. She did remember changing out of her dress, Beth herding her into bed before Ash pulled her into another kiss That night they slept in the same bed.

In the morning, Ash woke first, her head aching. Gods above, how much did I drink? Ash wondered as she climbed out of the bed. She spent five minutes digging through her bag for some Tylenol. With pills taken and several blood pouches drained, she turned her attention to the sleeping witch. Gently, she touched her lips, her cheeks turning red. We kissed. We actually kissed! The details were a muddled haze of drinking and laughter but she remembered being in Beth’s arms and decided fuck it! What if she doesn’t remember? The anxiety goblin whispered, the color draining out of her cheeks. “What if she doesn’t remember…”

“Only one way to find out...wake up, lover,” Ash, again, decided to fuck it and poked Beth’s cheek. “We need to get ready or we’ll miss our plane,”

Beth opened her dark eyes, blinking them at the vampire hovering over her. Thoughts of last night filled her. The main one being how a drunk, giggling vampire kissed her. Kissed. “You...you don’t have to call me lover anymore,” She forced herself to say it. She doubted Ash remembered most of the last evening. With how much she drank last night, there’s no way she remembers.

Ash frowned. “Listen, I’m all for silent pinning and that shit but I kissed you last night. You kissed me back. So I just assumed we were dating. Guess I assumed wrong-” she didn’t get to finish. Beth pulled her down into a kiss.

“You still taste like vodka,” said Beth when they finally pulled away.

“Oh, sue me.” Ash huffed. “Now come on, we’re going to miss our flight if you don’t get your ass out of bed.” A couple hours, they were back in Chicago and back in their apartment.

“Hey, did you see that Ash and Beth are holding hands?” Calla, the faerie, nudged her girlfriend as they left the building, passing the couple on their way up to their apartment.

“Don’t remind me,” whined the selkie.

“You owe me ten bucks, Shannon.”

“I know, Calla!”

#graded work #bi vampire #gay witch #fake relationship #weddings #GAY #SO MUCH GAY #a snake #DRUNK KISSING AT A GAY WEDDING #scoopable

5 notes · View notes

whispersofyenwood · 5 years ago

Text

In Character Interview

Tagged by @goblin-deity ! Thanks so much!

What’s your name?

Castle. But just call me Cass, alright?

Do you know why you were named that?

I was young, it sounded cool, I was desperate for distance from my old name. That's all.

Are you single or taken?

Taken, if you'd believe it. Sometimes I don't.

Have any abilities or powers?

You have heard of a Watcher before, right? See your soul, speak to the dead, foretell the circumstances of your own demise? That last one is mostly untrue. The others aren't.

Other than that… I'm handy with a blade, a decent shot and I can move quick when I got to.

What’s your eye color?

Dark brown. One of my best features.

How about your hair color?

Black. This going somewhere?

Have any family members?

None alive. Least none I care to know.

Oh? How about pets?

Haha. Most of them aren't my pets, I'm just holding onto them until we can adopt them out to proper homes. The only permanent residents are a couple mousers, the dragonling and the dogs Edér won't let go of.

That’s cool, I guess. Now, tell me something you don’t like?

Folk that think they're better than everyone else. That think they're smart enough to make everyone else's choices for them. Nothin' more dangerous than that.

Do you have any activities/hobbies that you like to do?

Let's see. I do woodcarving. Only with driftwood or other scraps, nothing fancy. I like to tinker, with weapons and bits of machinery. Especially the Engwithan stuff. And I enjoy playing cards, dice, whatever you can get a bet on.

Have you ever hurt anyone in any way before?

Who hasn't.

Ever… killed anyone before?

Yeah. I… try to avoid it when I can. Some folk just want to do things the hard way.

What kind of animal are you?

You sound like those Vithrack that used to live under my Keep. Y'know, when it's finally my time, and the cycle of death and rebirth isn't totally fucked, I've always wanted to come back as a cat. No one expects nothing of a cat. I don't think cats can have Awakenings, neither.

Name your worst habits?

I can be blunt, and not always on purpose, I leave my socks everywhere, I can't leave a sad animal no matter how impractical it is to keep on the ship, I drink too much, I stay up too late, I laugh too much at Serafen's dirty jokes… I'll just get Aloth to send you a list.

Do you look up to anyone at all?

Nah.

Are you gay, straight or bisexual?

All kinds of folks have caught my fancy before. Men, women, neither, somethin' else entirely.

Did you attend school?

My ma taught me my letters and how to count, that's it. Kinda wish I'd gotten a more formal education sometimes, especially when I was running a Keep. You wouldn't believe how much paperwork is involved.

Ever want to marry and have kids one day?

Ah, well. I guess that's up to Aloth.

Do you have any fangirls/fanboys?

Not that I know of.

What are you most afraid of?

Living forever. Or… existing forever. Becomes less of a ridiculous fear by the day.

What do you usually wear?

I'm a Plainsman at heart. Prefer to keep things light and breathable, cloth and wool rather than plate or chainmail. Easy to travel with, y'know. Those Dyrwoodans do like their leatherwork, though, and I've gotten a taste for it from my time at Caed Nua.

What’s one food that tempts you?

There's a dish in Ixamitl, it's all over, a staple if you grew up there. A pan of rice cooked with whatever you like. It's easy to make when you're travellin', and we used to a lot back in Dyrwood - and here in Deadfire, too, but not so often. It's somethin' that's different every time, and I'd never refuse it.

Am I annoying you?

...

Well, it’s still not over!

Go on then.

What class are you (low/middle/high)?

I suppose I'm in the gentry. Can I still call myself that, when my Keep's all dust and rubble? Don't even live in the Dyrwood anymore.

How many friends do you have?

More than 2.

What are your thoughts on pie?

It's good. I haven't had any in a while, thinking on it. Wonder if I still have that meat pie recipe from Gilded Vale...

Favorite drink?

That's tough. Nothing wrong with a pint of ale at the end of a hard day. There's some great rum in Dunnage if you know where to look. And Aloth's been introducing me to some of his favourite spiced wines.

What’s your favorite place?

Caed Nua was always a complicated thing for me, even before it got stomped into nothing, but I was always proud of what I did with the gardens. Got enough experience with alchemy to know my way around most herbs but I never tried growin em myself before. Felt good.

As for places that are still around… there's some nice, quiet spots in Neketaka if you know where to look.

Are you interested in anyone?

Yeah?

That was a stupid question…

As long as you know.

Would you rather swim in a lake or the ocean?

Lake. As much as I love the ocean, I've had one too many near-drowning to experiences there to feel comfortable swimming in it.

What’s your type?

Sharp, earnest, well-groomed, good sense of humour. Ears turn red when he's embarrassed.

Any fetishes?

Wouldn't you like to know.

Camping or indoors?

Indoors. Camping is alright sometimes, but when you end up doing it as much as I do, you crave a warm bed at night.

#watcher castle #Watcher Wednesday

8 notes · View notes

squidproquoclarice · 6 years ago

Note

I apologize if you've covered this already, but I just started reading Sunrise and I was wondering about your interpretation of Javier and Bill. Arthur REALLY soured hard on Javier even though they were good friends in the beginning--he can even be heard saying they should have left him to die in Guarma. I don't think RDR2 even really explains how Javier split up with Dutch, let alone the pathetic state he ends up in RDR1.

Nah, friend, no worries! If I’ve covered something before, the worst I’m gonna do is answer your Ask with a link to the previous meta (and adding any new thoughts and perspectives I may have had since first writing it). Tumblr Search is not particularly user-friendly so I know it’s hard to find out if I or anyone else has addressed that particular topic just by searching.I also have addressed Javier a bit, but it’s kind of broken up here and there, and Bill not really at all, so let’s just start fresh. I’m gonna give a brief overview of my read on them, and some notes on Arthur’s thoughts on them. I’ll do part 1 first with Bill, and then post a separate part 2 with Javier since this is getting lengthy.Part 1: BillBill comes across in RDR2 as very much a follower. I’m not surprised he joined the military, because the structure, the clear orders, the hierarchy, would have appealed to him. He’s not the sharpest knife in the drawer, but I think he’s panned for his lack of intelligence more than necessary and treated as the butt of too many jokes, and that does hurt him. He does make some insightful observations like how Arthur can just claim it’s “just one of them things” but Bill’s dragged mercilessly for his perceived failures. Even Arthur participates in that with joking about Bill’s failure with the dynamite rather than acknowledging he could easily have fucked it up too since he hooked up the detonator. (I think that “Wasn’t my fault, things just happened” reaction from Arthur is a panicked need to shift blame due to his anxiety and his lack of self-worth, where not producing results means worthlessness as a person, but that’s a whole ‘nother meta bag of chips.)His apparent PTSD from military service, his attempts to talk about how he’s “seen things” and seemingly reach out to people for support, are instead mocked with dismissive attitudes like “Yeah, you saw things while digging latrines, huh?”He’s a bit of a sexist and racist, realistically so for the times. His racism/sexism is more the dismissive “lesser than” assumption for women and non-whites rather than the active denigration and provocation Micah engages in. He’s strongly implied as a bi or gay man dismissed from the military for homosexual relationships, which has to take an additional toll in loneliness and isolation, particularly back then, and particularly given how emotionally unsupported he is in the gang. He seemingly wants to initiate something with Kieran, but doesn’t know how, except clumsy attempts at camaraderie to make up for his earlier threats at Dutch’s behest.He’s fiercely loyal to Dutch as his leader and savior, and also likely feels undervalued. So the chance for him to come into his own, as he sees it, in Chapter 6 by sticking by Dutch and proving his worth finally, is something he’s not going to pass up. His moment has finally arrived to shine. The golden boys, Arthur and John, are failing Dutch and walking away. He’s deeply disappointed in Arthur, more so than John, because while he sees John as a coddled pet, Arthur’s been a man worth looking up to all this time. So he’ll stick with Dutch and finally prove his worth. Arthur treats him mostly like the big dumb muscle he himself pretends to be, and had Arthur been more secure in himself, or more in touch with his own emotions, that could have been common ground and sympathy for Bill. As is, I think he cares about Bill as a brother in arms, yes, but they’re seemingly not that close. They don’t have a natural affinity and while it’s not Arthur’s contempt like he has for Micah, his role as “implacable oldest brother keeping the boys in line” means he can’t really reach out to Bill either. So he does like he does with Sean: briskly trying to keep a little brother in his place and teach him necessary things. It’s interestingly like Arthur and Dutch’s dynamic: the senior man sparingly doling out his approval to his junior, and keeping him hungry for it. Guess Arthur picked that up from Dutch. :P Though it doesn’t quite work. Bill pushes back on it far more than Arthur does, because he genuinely believes he’s better than the scraps of validation and praise he gets from the gang. Post-RDR2, he’s taken Arthur’s place as the hyperloyal man spouting how all they need to do is believe in Dutch and they’ll be all right. I do think he absorbed Micah’s bad influence too of overwhelming and unnecessary violence, and even things like participating in Dutch’s theatricality with the gelding shears, combined to make something truly ugly. He seems to start to play all of that straight. As a gang leader in 1911 in RDR1, he’s more or less become like Colm O’Driscoll, who they used to scorn as nearly an animal, with his gang engaging in overwhelming violence, torture, implied rape, etc. He’s clearly given way to the worst in him.Timelinewise, I do think he stuck with Dutch a good while. In Sunrise, I have Bill accompanying Dutch as he flees the country in late 1900. I’m guessing it’s 1907 when they finally part ways–Dutch going to see Micah, and Bill presumably starting his own gang in New Austin with the power of the Del Lobos broken. But it seems from RDR1 they still keep in touch, which makes sense with Dutch relatively nearby to New Austin and establishing his own gang base in Cochinay, now that Tall Trees and Great Plains are cleared of Skinners.Part 2 for Javier in a little bit.

#bill williamson #arthur morgan #rdr2 #rdr1 #thank you for coming to my red talk

15 notes · View notes

stinkyies · 6 years ago

Text

realized i can't not be with you

rating: pg-13

word count: 3,887

summary: dan and phil are crew members on fall out boys tour

notes: i had to scrap my original fic idea bc it was kicking my ass and i didnt think i would be able to finish it and i never wrote something that long before so i wrote this instead in about a week and i would love to thank @yourfriendlyblogstalker for being my beta (for both fics) and having to deal with my shitty grammar (for both fics like this girl deserves a medal) written for @phandomficfests tour fic fest

ao3 link

Fall Out Boy, Mania Tour, US 2017

“Soundcheck on Hold Me Tight. Is the band ready?” Marianne, Fall Out Boy’s stage manager asks.

The four men on stage look at each other and give her the thumbs up. As she turns away from them, she squints up at the lighting and sound booth that is so far away from where she is standing.

“Lighting, are you ready?” She asks into her headset.

“One sec,” Phil replies into the microphone in the booth, pressing and turning some buttons and dials on the board, “one of the controls isn't working but I almost got it.”

She rolls her eyes and even though Phil can’t see her from the side of the stage, he could sense that she did it. She changes the channel of her mic and says something as she flips through the pages of her clipboard. She changes her channel back to reach the booth at the back.

“Sound, are you ready?”

“Yeah just helping Phil with the lights,” Tyler says while fiddling around with some of the wires.

“Tyler if you're on sound, why the hell are you helping with lighting. Literally, the one thing you said you couldn't do tech-wise at your job interview was lighting.”

“Chill, I'm literally just handing him the wires, I think I can manage that.”

“You better be able to manage it.”

Tyler and Marianne have this whole bit where they pretend to hate each other but they would probably take a bullet for the other. The little time they have known each other somehow created this insane friendship that Phil wishes he had. Well, he obviously has friends, but he never really found someone he was able to click with like they had. Tyler and Marianne are practically soulmates without the actual romantic love involved. Maybe Phil’s just that lonely.

Just then, a tall man with a mess of brown curls comes running up to the booth holding a box with a bunch of wires hanging out of it.

“I found a bunch of these in the back of the venue.”

“Dan, did you steal those wires?”

“No, Tyler, I simply took them without permission. Besides I can just put them back after the show is finished.”

Dan doesn't realize how close he's standing to the booth microphone because suddenly, Dan admitting he stole like $2,000 in lighting equipment is loudly echoing off of the walls. He's pretty sure most of the venue staff heard him say it.

“DAN, WHAT THE HELL DID YOU JUST DO?” Marianne screams so loudly that she doesn’t need to talk into her mic. It’s practically as loud as Dan’s theft confession. Meanwhile, the band on stage is practically laughing their asses off. They are lying down on the ground clutching their stomachs because this is too goddamn awkward and it shouldn't be this funny but… it is.

“Well, the system needs an 850P wire and our only one broke so I found a box and…. Ya know…. Just snagged one?”

“Dan, Phil just said the controls aren't working. He didn't say we need a new wire.”

“Yeah but it wasn't working because it wasn't the correct wire,” Dan pushes Phil and Tyler out of the way. “I got this.” Dan rummages through the box and pulls out the correct one. It’s tangled with a bunch of other wires. “I can't get this unknotted. Phil, can you help me?” Phil nods and grabs the wire where Dan is holding it. Their hands brush together. Well barely brush together but Phil swears he felt something electric. Then again, it might have been the wire. Phil unknots it and hands it back to Dan.

“Thanks,” Dan says with a smile. A smile that makes Phil weak in the knees. A smile that you can’t not fall in love with. As Dan turns back and rearranges the wires, Phil is blushing like a teenager. Tyler looks at Phil and smiles as he rolls his eyes. Tyler beckons Phil to bend down and he whispers in his ear that “we need to talk at lunch.” Phil nods and looks back at Dan. Dan plugs in the wire, plays with some dials, and lights turn on.

“Finally!” Dan's smile is huge. Phil thinks it's adorable that Dan is getting this excited about stealing a wire and fixing the system. He’s always found Dan attractive, since the start of the tour, but since Dan switched from sound to lighting, he's all Phil can think about. Before Dan would just be backstage playing with the amp volumes. Now he's in the booth with Phil and Tyler. Phil already knows one thing about the curly haired man.

He's fucking gone for him.

They have an hour for lunch so Phil and Tyler decide to walk to a diner with a few other people. And Dan. Phil had to drag Dan along because Dan just wanted some pizza but he convinced him to come with them. Dan agreed but some of the other people in the group wanted Dan to join them and Phil let him go. He didn't really know the other people so well but he wanted Dan there in case he got the courage to talk to him. Besides him and Tyler needed to talk anyway.

About him.

The second they both sit down at their little table, Tyler starts to talk. After the waitress took their order of course.

“How long?”

“How long… what?”

“Phil, stop trying to divert the question. C'mon,” he lightly shoves Phil in the shoulder. “Spill.”

“I mean I always kinda liked him but… this is the first time I get to actually interact with him without having to actually go up to him?”

“I'm ashamed of myself. I usually catch on to these things quickly.”

“I am good at hiding myself.”

“That's why literally everyone thought you were straight until you said you wanted to fuck Thor a little too loudly that night.”

“Don't remind me. They still don’t stop tormenting me,” Phil says putting his hands in his face over-dramatically.

“On the bright side Dan was into that, I think.”

“You really think Dan is gay?”

“Not gay because Jordan walked in on Lexi the intern giving him a blowjob the day before tour started but I would definitely say bi or something.”

“Do you think he's still with Lexi?”

“Nah they don't talk much- it was totally a one night stand. You'd be fine.”

Phil is about to open his mouth and say something but he is interrupted by the waitress bringing over their drinks. She walks away and Phil just looks down at his cup of soda, still feeling disappointed. And very discouraged. He traces the rim of the cup with his finger.

“What if he only thinks of me as a one night stand?”

“Then you have to make it more than a one night stand.”

“Does Dan seem like the type of guy that would only be into one night stands?”

“Nah he's a softie. Trust me. I dated a guy who was only into to hookups and it did not end well.”

“How do you even date someone who is only into casual sex?”

“You don't.”

Phil looks across the restaurant. His eyes land on the body that is sticking up from the booth the most, because of his height. With those fucking brown curls he just wants to thread his fingers through. Dan is smiling and laughing at what someone said. Fuck. Phil would love to be the cause of that smile. Dan's eyes travel upwards and settle on Phil’s. He gives a slight wave to Phil then focuses his attention back at the people he's sitting with.

“Maybe you should go over and talk to him.”

“With all of those people around? No thanks, I think that would kind of ruin the point.”

Without saying a word, Tyler grabs his drink and gets out of the booth. He walks over to Dan and whispers something in his ear. Dan gives people at the table a wink and one looks at Phil and his friends start to make kissy faces at him. Dan rolls his eyes, grabs his drink and trades seats with Tyler.

“Tyler said something about wanting to work on lighting ideas?”

“Did he actually?”

“What answer are you looking for mate?”

“The one he wants,” Phil replied flatly while gesturing at Tyler.

Dan gives a little smirk and sits down across from him. From the outside, Phil looks calm and composed, maybe a little red, but on the inside he’s chaos. At least at the lighting booth, Tyler is there with the both of them to keep Phil from doing anything stupid. Besides, it's dark during the actual show so Phil would be able to hide his face from Dan and during the show it's loud. Very loud. If Phil says anything strange there's a good chance it will be gone in favor of a stadium full of screaming fans. Here he can't. Here he is sitting right across from him under very bright fluorescent lights. Anything little he says or does, it’s on full display for Dan. He loves this and hates it at the same time. Dan seems very relaxed. Like a friend who just wanted to talk to him about his lighting idea. Phil knows there's a part of him that knows that was just a setup to get them to talk. But he doesn't mention it. Obviously.

“Really why did he call me over? You're a bad liar, Lester.”

Fuck. He knows. Phil knows he is a horrible liar but secretly hopes that Dan is too oblivious to realize. Why does he always go after the ones with common sense?

“Just wanna get to know you, that's all.”

Dan gives him this look like he is disappointed in him. Well not really in him but more in his flirting skills. Phil has never been the best at flirting- usually, he awkwardly fumbles with his words until the person talking to him would get frustrated and walk away. He wishes he could be better at it but the best flirting technique with the best person at flirting ever- isn’t enough to get the man of his dreams to like him.

“What do you need to know?”

“Just the casual stuff. Friends hobbies, etc,” If you're single. “Like I wanna be on a first name basis.”

“This is your way of making friends? No normal conversation?” Dan’s being a cocky shit and he knows it, and he isn't trying to be mean to Phil, just trying to tease him. But it still hurt Phil’s feelings a little bit. Dan sees a flash of pain across Phil’s face.

“Hey, I didn't mean it like that. I was just joking- sorry. I guess. Fuck. Normally I'm better at this.” Better at this. Better at this? What the fuck did that mean? Did that mean the way I think it meant? Question after question start forming in Phil's brain at rapid fire. A smirk starts to creep up on his face.

“Better at what?”

“Don't play dumb Lester.” Two can play at that game.

“Better at flirting with cute boys?”

Dan's face quickly drains of its color. And not in the good way. Not in the my crush is admitting that he likes me kind of way. More in the I have just seen a ghost type of way. Dan quickly stands up, walks over to his original table, takes out his wallet and throws $10 down, and practically runs out of the restaurant.

Everyone sitting at Dan's original table is staring at Phil. Phil is staring back at them. What the fuck just happened? Tyler sees what happened and walks back to Phil and sits down.

“What the hell just happened Phil?!”

“I'm trying to figure it out myself.”

Tyler gives him a look that says you better fucking tell me because this is your one shot at getting him back and you better not waste it.

“So I was trying? To flirt with him?”

“Wow, Phil so descriptive. Really helps me, I totally know how to fix your problem.”

Phil explains to Tyler about what just happened between him and Dan. When he gets to the last part, Tyler's eyes go wide.

“YOU WHAT?!”

“Shhh Tyler we’re in a restaurant, stop screaming.”

“Phil, that's the last thing you ask when flirting, NOT THE FIRST.”

“Why didn't you tell me that?”

“You told me you have had boyfriends in the past, I thought you would know shit like this by now.”

Phil shrugs his shoulders sadly. “Guess not.” He looks down and the waitress brings over their food. They both thank her as she puts it down and walks away. Tyler starts eating his burger happily while Phil just pokes at his waffles.

“Not hungry Phil?”

“Not anymore, lost my appetite I guess.” Phil pauses before continuing. “Tyler, I just want to know why he reacted the way he did.”

“Maybe its been a while since he has dated a boy. Maybe he's never actually had a boyfriend before.” Maybe he doesn't want to be outed like that.“There's a lot of reasons.”

“But when I have gone on dates with blokes, that's never happened.”

“Do the guys know it’s a date?” “Yes, obviously.”

“Did Dan know?”

“I don't know, considering you asked him to come over.” Phil knew he was being an ass but he is mad about Tyler playing a role in driving away his crush.

“I thought you knew how to flirt not whatever the hell that was.”

“What did you whisper to Dan?”

“I told him that you wanted to talk to him about lights and I emphasized the word talk. I didn't say anything stupid, Phil.”

Phil puts his head in his hands. “I can't believe I messed this whole thing up!”

Tyler walks over to Phil’s side of the table and places a comforting hand on his back. “It’s okay Phil, there's an easy way to fix this.”

“What?”

“Actually talking about it.”

“Tyler that's what got us into this whole mess. I doubt that’s how it's gonna get us out.”

“I mean talk to him, not flirt, dipshit.”

“I just want to win him back.”

“Phil, you never had him to begin with.”

Phil shot him a dirty glare. “Ok fine, you can win him back.” Tyler put air quotes around on ‘back’. Phil gave him a smile.

“What do I say to him?”

“Just have an actual conversation: apologize about the comment, explain that you wanna go out him,” Tyler leaned close to him, “ask him out, be cute, if he says no, be sweet.” Tyler leaned out and into his previous position, “and just like be a normal human being. Think you can manage that?”

“Not really.”

“Then you're set!”

Back at the arena, Phil finds Dan toying around on the switchboard, turning the stage area pink, to green, to red, to blue, to any color available. Phil taps him on the shoulder and Dan turns around. His facial expression was neutral until he saw that Phil was standing behind him. His line of a mouth turned into something of a frown, eyes squinting.

“What do you want Phil?”

“I just want to talk.”

“Are you gonna screw that up again?” Phil brushes Dan’s slightly harsh comment off, but it still hit him a tiny bit.

“I want to apologize about earlier.” Dan scans Phil’s body, up and down, and without saying a word, drags Phil by the arm out of the booth, through the venue, and into a little janitors closet near one of the stage entrances. He slams the door behind him and turns on the one light that hangs down from the ceiling. Even though Dan is pretty pissed off, the soft yellow light frames his face and hair perfectly.

“Talk.”

“Alright um.. So I.. so..” Phil was slightly nervous before but he was able to cover it up. But now he can't even get out a word without freezing up. Phil is shaking and Dan could probably tell. Not really because of the light, but because they are standing so close together. Phil’s not even sure if his nerves are because of the confrontation or him and Dan standing so close. Phil looks into Dan’s beautiful brown eyes and Dan’s expression goes soft. Dan is obviously still mad but he has a heart. He can tell Phil is freaking out.

“Phil it's okay, just tell me what you were going to say.” Dan's voice is soft and soothing. Like a warm fuzzy blanket on a cold day. It calms Phil but the fact that his crush is relaxing him doesn't go unchecked.

“I, so, I’m really sorry about earlier. I honestly wasn't thinking clearly and I didn’t realize you didn't like me like that, or like boys like that for that matter anyway, and I realize I was probably picking up on the wrong signals and fuck and I-”

“Phil I'm not mad at that.”

“What do you mean?” What even did he mean? Was he not being mad at Phil for thinking he likes boys? For picking up something totally different? Is he mad at himself? Was he just overreacting?

“I’m- okay I don't really know how to say this- I like you too.” This confuses Phil even more.

“Why is this a problem?” Phil’s nerves are almost completely gone. But Dan is growing more and more anxious by the second. It's almost as if Phil’s anxiety is being sucked out of him and moved into Dan.

“I-I'm not really ready to be out yet, fuck.”

“Are you not out to anyone?” What he meant to ask was ‘are you really not out to anyone’ but he didn't add the really in it because he doesn't know what his home life is like and doesn't want to come off as a jackass.

“My family and close friends know- and they're super supportive and shit- but I think it's because I don't really feel that it has to be everyone's business- like, okay, like after this tour ends I’m probably never going to see any of these people again. Why should these random people get to know something extremely personal?”

“Yeah, I get where you're coming from. But if you don't want everyone ‘knowing’, you could just live out of the closet not come out of it.”

“That's true but that's a whole big process and what if the people I’m surrounded with don't accept me, then I have to spend like 3 months stuck with them on a tiny tour bus with them hating my guts just because I make comments about guys and I tend to shag them once in a blue moon.”

“Touche.” Dan gives a little chuckle and his face falls flat again. Phil cups the side of Dan’s cheek and runs his thumb over his cheek.

“I really wasn't thinking about the ‘cute boys’ comment. I didn't realize who was around us and how loud I said it and what your situation might be. If it makes you feel better I accidentally screamed I want to sleep with Thor in front of everyone and they keep teasing me about it. On the bright side, they aren't like homophobes about it.”

“That's good. I did find it very funny when you said that.”

“Not you too!” Dan started to laugh and he is getting calmer, his nerves are finally chilling out.

“I want to start this whole thing over. Is that okay? Dan?”

“Yes. I would love that.” They give each other small, but sweet smiles. Phil keeps his hand on Dan’s cheek and Dan’s arms wrap around Phil’s waist. Their foreheads touch. They stay like that for a little bit. Silent, not moving, enjoying each other's presence. Phil is about to move his head up to press his lips against Dan’s when Phil’s phone loudly interrupts him.

“Seriously? At this bloody moment!?” Phil says while Dan laughs at Phil’s over- dramaticness.

“Phil, what does it say?”

“We have to get back to rehearsal.” They walk back to the stage mostly in silence. Phil is brushing his arm against Dan’s, on purpose, just to feel him next to him. It feels like sparks and softness. Phil never wants it to end. He just wants to take Dan’s arm and hold it close to his chest, both of his arms keeping Dan’s close. But he doesn't. Because Dan isn't ready. Even though it practically pains Phil not to touch him it probably pains Dan even more for Phil to be touching him like that in public. And Phil is completely fine with that.

“Dan, Phil! Where the hell are you guys? We were supposed to start rehearsal 15 minutes ago! We were looking everywhere for you!”

“Marianne, me and Phil were just out talking. We’re sorry to have kept you waiting for so long.” Dan’s voice is reassuring, unlike the shaky wreck it was just a few minutes ago.

“You boys better have been talking across the city because I don't want to hear any damn excuses! Get back in the booth and get ready.” They both run into the booth and share a secret smile while fitting on their headsets. Tyler notices, smiles and nudges Phil on the shoulder.

“What happened?”

Phil smiles in Dan’s direction. “Nothing. Nothing happened.”

The music is loud and pumping. It's so dark in the venue but the stage is so bright that it’s practically blinding. The energy in the air is electrifying. The fans are just as loud as the band.

“So hold me tight. Hold me tight or don't.” Patrick almost screams into the mic. The fans shout back.

“I got too high again. Realized I can't not be with you. Or be just your friend. I love you to death But I just can't, I just can't pretend. We were lovers first confidants but never friends. Were we ever friends?”

Phil looks over at Dan, who is bouncing along with the crowd. He smiles as he plays with the switchboard.

“But when your stitch comes loose, I wanna sleep on every piece of fuzz and stuffing that comes out of you, you.” Patrick sings as Dan looks back at Phil, who has been looking at Dan the whole time. Dan moves closer to Phil, tilts up his chin and kisses him. It's so dark that no one would really see, besides who the hell is looking at the lighting crew anyway? Everyone's attention is on the band playing in front of them. The song itself isn't that romantic, but to them, it feels like a love song. Tyler saw them kiss and starts laughing at them. Dan rolls his eyes at Tyler but Tyler gives Phil a high five.

“You finally did it!” Tyler mouths to Phil. Phil can't help but be proud of himself. His crush likes him back. AND he got him to kiss him. What isn't there to be proud of?

The kiss is a simple gesture. It was small and no one noticed. Maybe that’s why it's so special. It’s a start- a small start, but a good start.

And that's all that matters.

#realized i can't not be with you #phandom fic fest #my fic #text #phan #dan and phil #tour fic #mine

17 notes · View notes

spectrumscribe · 7 years ago

Text

disclosure.

for @lgbtmntweek, some absolute nonsense about five queer gendered kids and one cis (but gay) kid having a full disclosure session to just avoid any over-dramatic revelations. literally nothing but nice things, for once in my writing career.

“Wait, wait wait wait wait,” Casey says, holding up both hands and stopping the entire conversation in its tracks. He looks at April, then at Raph and Donnie, and then back at April. Like he has for the last thirty seconds as all three of them awkwardly tried to explain the two brothers, before things ended up revealed in a less controlled situation.

Casey points around April, towards Raph and Donnie. “April, these guys are the other trans kids you know? Seriously?”

“Gender dysphoria is, as it turns out, not limited to the human experience,” Donnie says in a dry, somewhat defensive tone.

“Is this going to be a problem?” Raph asks in a definitely defensive tone, poorly hidden by derisiveness. “Because that’ll be the shittiest hypocrisy I’ve heard all year. Even over Mikey’s rule about double-dipping in the chip sauce.”

“I’m the one who makes it for you ungrateful people, I can do what I want with it!” Mikey exclaims from his and Leo’s side of the couch. The joke almost lightens the mood, but doesn’t do anything from their subtle readiness to step in, in case this is going to be a problem.

Casey shakes his head, zero judgement in his expression. “Nope, no problem. Just a little surprised? I mean, you guys pass really well. I wouldn’t’ve guessed.”

Donnie and Raph exchange glances, and shrug. Very subtle relief passes between them as they do; mostly because they’ve all been skirting the Talk about this for a few weeks, despite knowing that the risk of rejection was very low concerning Casey.

“It’s not like we adhere to mammalian gender normative appearances anyway,” Donnie says factually. His word choices are still a bit lengthy; betraying his lingering anxiety about the situation. “Unless you’re someone who’s spent their life studying reptilian anatomy, I doubt anyone would guess in casual passing.”

“And passing is sort of the goal, so we wouldn’t want people to guess anyways,” Raph adds, feeling a little more relaxed than Donnie. Then, with a smirk, “And you don’t do so bad with passing yourself, Jones.”

Casey grins proudly. “Blockers and binders, since eleven. I’ve got it down pretty pat, and my mom did have a bit of stick figure. So lucky genetics and cool parents made it an okay transition, really. Plus my team was really supportive.”

“Sensei was really great about it, too,” Raph says, sharing an elbow nudge with Donnie. “He even read a bunch of articles and books about it when we got around to telling him.”

“He’s surprisingly very open minded for a traditional Japanese ninja,” Donnie says brightly.

April sighs a tad wistfully. “I wish my book club had been. And my old school.”

Casey puts an arm across her shoulders, ignoring the narrow look he gets from Donnie for the action. “Screw them, ours right now is kickass about this stuff. They got a gender neutral bathroom and everything.”

“Oh, really?” Leo asks with interest, glancing at Mikey. “Weren’t you talking about those the other day?”

“Yeah, and we should definitely get one,” Mikey says seriously. “Inclusivity is important.”

“Mikey… our bathroom is already gender neutral.”

“We need to make it official, though. With a sign.”

“I could make one,” Donnie suggests. “I have some scrap metal lying around.”

Mikey lights up, running off a collection of symbols he’s already memorized for the idea, and Leo rolls his eyes. There’s no real difference to him whether or not the sign is there, but if it makes Mikey, Raph, and Donnie happy, then why not?

April claps her hands abruptly. “Okay, so as great as all this trans male and gender-fluid solidarity is, if we could by chance find a trans girl in the future, I’d really appreciate the company, thanks.” Her words are a joke, but the sentiment is sincere.

“We’ll work on it,” Donnie says with a laugh, sneakily pinching Casey’s hand and forcing the other teen to remove it from April’s shoulder. He and Casey trade glares over April’s head, and she sighs under her breath, because teenage boys.

“Wait,” Casey says, breaking his staring contest with Donnie and backtracking mentally with the conversation. “Gender-fluid? Which one of you is that??”

“Me~!” Mikey says, all but singsong. Leo gestures vaguely at Mikey as well, fondly exasperated.

“Oh, should I have been using a different pronoun then?” Casey asks, sitting forwards and seeming a little concerned.

Mikey waves him off, smiling easily. “Nah, I’m good with pretty much anything under the sun. Gender’s just a social construct, after all. You just go with what feels right, and I feel a-okay with any gender.”

“I’m the boring cis sibling,” Leo offers dryly, not looking perturbed at all by that fact.

“And we love you anyways!” Mikey says, sliding over and giving Leo a one-sided hug. A bubble of laughter comes from Donnie and Raph at that, easy humor about a familiar and regular joke among their family.

Casey nods, sitting back against the couch again. As the conversation flows back to making a sign for the bathroom- “I think we’re gonna need MULTIPLE signs, since we got multiple genders around here!” “But can we please ask Sensei before we start drilling holes in the door? Please??”- April nudges Casey’s side and smiles at him.

“Told you they were cool,” She says, remembering when she and Casey had first started studying together- the two of them somewhat suspicious that they’d been matched up simply because of their identities. Even when she’d been furious with the brothers, she hadn’t been able to help herself mentioning the mutual support she’d found with them to Casey.

Casey grins, and looks utterly comfortable with their surrounding social group. “Sure did, Red. Shame I punched ‘em in the face first time we met, though.”

April grins back. “They got over it.”

Over her head, Donnie glares very clearly that he has not. Casey cheekily smiles back, very clear that he doesn’t actually regret anything.

Witness to both pointed gazes, Raph rolls his eyes at the ceiling the same time as April does.

#i miss season 1-2 bc those months were pure ones #My writing #tmnt #tmnt 2012 #lgbtmntweek #transgender things plus a side of genderfluid support #side side of cissex support #just support in general #working title for this was 'trans kids unanonymous' lmao #team as family #team as squad

79 notes · View notes

fortheloveofpearlet · 7 years ago

Text

Anatomy of a Lie [Chapter 1]

I’m back bitches! If it wasn’t for @leatwerpenn this fic never would have made it this far. She talked me off the metaphorical ledge when I almost scrapped this fic in when it damn near drove me crazy, so you can thank her for this! Mildly influenced by Pretty Little Liars and continuing from this doctors drabble I wrote.

This fic is insane and is one hell of a rollercoaster ride! Word of advice - trust no one. Be suspicious of everyone. And enjoy!

Chapter 1

‘Have I ever told you how attractive you are Dr Lent?’ Her voice was slurred and her eyes were hooded from the alcohol. Matt would find it inappropriate for one of his surgical nurses to make such a comment if it had been under any other circumstances. But he had to cut her some slack, it was the hospital Christmas party and they’d all had their fair share of booze. It was possible looking at Shea that she’d had a little more than most but Matt knew he couldn’t blame the girl for wanting to cut loose. They all worked long shifts, usually unsociable hours and they dealt with death on a daily basis. So instead of embarrassing the nurse he chuckled lightly and threw her one of his charming smiles.

'I’m flattered Shea.’ He sipped his drink. 'But as you know I am a married man.’ He raised his left hand and wiggled his ring finger. Shea groaned and pulled a face.

'Damn, why are all the good ones taken?’ She scoffed with a roll of her eyes. 'It’s no wonder someone snapped you up, you’re fine as hell. Not to mention you’re actually a nice guy. And a doctor! So that makes you smart and loaded.’ She sipped more of her drink as she slurred although Matt thought someone should take the drink away from her. He chuckled again.

'While all of this true,’ he laughed. 'When I met my wife I was a med student with no money sleeping on my friends couch. Not to mention I had adult braces.’ He whispered the last part.

'Get outta town!’ Shea raised her voice cackling a little. 'Dr Lent with adult braces.’ She laughed to herself.

'Shea, please call me Matt, we’ve been through this before.’ He was only partly trying to change the subject.

'But Dr Lent sounds so sexy.’ She pouted her large lips at him and Matt wanted the ground to swallow him whole. This was why he usually changed his shift so he was always working the night of the Christmas parties. He looked away from Shea across the bar the hospital had hired out for the occasion. Their eyes met across the room like they always seemed to do. Jason smiled at Matt and Matt smiled back.

Help me, Matt mouthed across the room while Shea was preoccupied feeling Matt’s bicep through his sweater. Jason smirked mischievously.

Nuh uh, He mouthed back. Matt clenched his jaw. He looked back at Shea and shook the girl off his arm.

'Shea please, married remember.’

'Wouldn’t be the first married guy I’ve been with.'

God she was going to be mortified tomorrow when she remembered this, Matt thought. He looked back at Jason.

Please? He mouthed again. Jason looked as though he was contemplating this for a second but then he shook his head with a smile.

Nah, he mouthed across the room. Matt clenched his jaw again.

'Shea you’ll have to excuse me,’ he looked back at the nurse. 'I have some business I need to discuss with Dr Dardo.’

'Business.’ She scoffed. 'It’s a party Dr Lent, no shop talk.’

'I’m afraid this really can’t wait. I’m sure I’ll see you around later.' God I hope not. With that he took his leave and headed through the crowds of his colleagues towards Jason. When he reached him, he punched the other man in the arm.

'Asshole. Absolute asshole.’

'She was just being friendly.’ Jason smirked.

'There’s friendly and then there’s…friendly.' Matt sipped his drink.

'It’s just a bit of fun Matt. What happens at the Christmas party stays at the Christmas party.’

'Are you suggesting I cheat on Naomi?’ Matt raised an eyebrow at him.

'No not cheat.’ Jason shook his head. 'Just have some fun, enjoy yourself. My god when was the last time a beautiful, young piece of ass even looked your way?’

'I get plenty of offers thank you very much.’ Matt scoffed.

'Bull.’ Jason laughed. 'You get less offers than my ninety year old, dementia patient.'

'I’m married.’ Why was everybody struggling to understand that today?

'So am I.’ Jason shrugged. 'Doesn’t mean I don’t dabble in the occasional flirting. Earlier I had that pretty, blonde doctor Sasha right on my hook. I could have clicked my fingers and she would have been in my bed so fast it would make your head spin. Flirting is harmless.’

'You’re an asshole.’ Matt sipped his drink again. 'I’m sure Court wouldn’t see it as harmless.’

'What she doesn’t know won’t hurt her.’ Jason smirked.

'Oh she’s a lucky, lucky woman.’ Matt rolled his eyes.

'You need to loosen up and have some fun. I can’t even remember the last time I saw you have fun.’ Jason turned serious.

'I have fun all the time.’

'Liar.’ Jason pulled a face. 'What are you drinking?’ Jason snatched Matt’s glass from his hand and sniffed it before pulling another face. 'Soda? You’re drinking soda?’ He sounded exasperated.

'Yes because this is a work function. And unlike people like Shea and you I don’t want to make an ass of myself.’

'I’m getting you a drink.’

'You are not.’

'Oh I am.’ Jason pushed passed Matt and headed to the bar. Matt sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. There was no arguing with Jason. Jason returned soon after and handed Matt a large whiskey as well as a shot of god only knows what. Jason had his own shot and he raised it in the air.

'Merry Christmas bitch.’ Jason’s eyes sparkled. Matt sighed again.

'One shot. One drink. Then I’m out.’

'Whatever you say.’ Jason smirked. Reluctantly Matt raised his shot and clinked his glass on Jason’s. They downed the shots and Matt groaned as he felt it burning his throat. He didn’t know it yet but that would be the moment in the night when things started spiralling out of control. One shot led to another and another and before Matt would realise what had happened he would be wasted. His lips would meet someone’s who wasn’t his wife and things would change forever. After that party, his life would never be the same again.

—————————————–

The ring on his finger caught the light as Matt awkwardly played with his hands. He saw it glisten and he had a surge of guilt storm his whole body but he tried his best to ignore it. Jason was staring at him, maybe willing him to say something or maybe willing himself to say something, Matt wasn’t sure. The already small space felt smaller somehow, like the walls could be closing in on them. Matt felt like he couldn’t breathe properly, a wave of nausea hit him. His ring caught the light again and the guilty feeling didn’t do anything to help the nausea so he stuffed his hands in the pockets of his white coat. Jason must have known why he was doing this as he held up his hand and twirled his own ring around his finger.

'I feel like the guilt’s slowly eating away at me.’ Jason finally spoke, his voice barely above a whisper. If anyone was to walk by the medical supply closet they would hear them if they were too loud. Matt kept his hands in his pockets.

'Slowly? Not for me. It feels like the guilt has taken up residence in my body and has destroyed everything in its path.’ Matt spoke slightly melodramatically. Jason raised an eyebrow at him.

'It was just a kiss.’ He whispered. 'I didn’t mean anything right?’

'Of course not.’ Matt was quick to say, almost too quick. 'I’m not gay. I love my wife. We’d just had too much to drink.’

'Yeah same. I mean if Courtney found out she would go insane but…she’s not going to find out right?’ Jason stopped looking at his wedding ring and stuff his own hands in his pockets now.

'She’s not going to find out from me.’ Matt insisted. 'And I’m pretty sure no one else saw.’

'Pretty sure?’ Jason frowned. 'How sure is pretty sure?’

'I don’t know Jason!’ Matt sounded exasperated. 'I was a little too preoccupied to be scoping out who was watching.' Preoccupied with your tongue down my throat.

'Someone would have said something by now right? It’s been a week, I’m sure if someone saw they would have said something.’

'Maybe.’ Matt shrugged. 'Look let’s just forget about it ok? There’s not a whole lot we can do about it now anyway. It happened, it was dumb. Let’s just get on with things and never talk about it again.’

'Agreed.’ Jason nodded.

'Right well…I guess I’ll see you around.’ Matt reached passed Jason and grabbed a handful of disposable gloves and gauze before he hurried out of the supply closet. Jason fell back against the one empty wall and sighed heavily. He and Matt had known each other for years. They’d first met in medical school, they’d done their residencies together and finally got offered jobs at the same hospital. Matt was a surgeon and Jason was on the medical side but they’d always been close despite the divide. Maybe they’d been too close? They were at each other’s weddings, Jason remember watching Matt marry Naomi like it was yesterday, he wondered if Matt remembered Jason’s wedding to Courtney as well. Jason had never looked at Matt as anything more than his friend, at least he didn’t think he had. But last week things had changed. It had been the hospital Christmas party and for once both Jason and Matt had been off shift and decided to go. One thing had led to another, copious amounts of alcohol had been consumed and somehow the night had ended with a kiss. Jason had no idea if he’d kissed Matt or if Matt had kissed him but he supposed it didn’t matter either way. It had happened and Jason was sure that this was going to destroy their friendship. He sighed again, knowing someone would be looking for him soon, if they weren’t already. He grabbed a handful of medical supplies that he didn’t need, it was just a cover, and exited the supply closet.

—————————————–

Matt was walking through the halls heading to his next pre-op consultation when his phone vibrated in his pocket. Normally he wouldn’t have his phone on him, it wasn’t exactly protocol but since he’d received that anonymous text message the day after the Christmas party he couldn’t bear to be separated from the device. He slid the phone from his pocket, New Text Message from Unknown Number. Matt’s breath caught in his throat. His hand was shaking as he slid his thumb on the screen to open the message.

Don’t believe me? - Anon

The first messaged he’d received from them had simply read, ’I know what you did - Anon.' Matt hadn’t replied to it, he’d thought it was just a dumb prank. He was starting to think it was more than that. His hands were still shaking as he tapped out a reply.

Who the fuck is this? You don’t know shit about me so leave me alone.

He hit send and put the phone back in his pocket. He barely got two steps down the hall when it vibrated again.

New Picture Message from Unknown Number.

Matt looked around the hall to make sure he was alone before he opened it. He had no idea what to expect, or maybe he did, he just didn’t want to admit it. Nothing could have prepared him for what he saw when he opened that message. Staring back at him was a grainy photograph, clearly not taken on a modern phone. But despite the graininess, the image was clear.

Matt kissing someone who wasn’t his wife. Matt kissing someone who wasn’t even a woman. Matt was frozen to the spot as he looked down at the picture. Did this mean someone in the hospital was tormenting him? It had only been hospital staff at the bar that night, at least he thought it had been. He looked around again, the hall was still empty. His heart was beating so loudly in his chest it was all he could hear.

What do you want?

He typed a reply and hit send. He continued staring at the photo while he awaited a reply. He saw the three little dots appear at the bottom of the message screen and he held his breath.

I want you to admit to what you’ve done - Anon

Admit to what he’d done? They wanted him to fess up to Naomi about his kiss with Jason? And he supposed if he didn’t this anonymous was going to tell her?

It was just a kiss, Naomi doesn’t need to know, please?

The three little dots appeared as soon as Matt’s message sent.

I’m not talking about the kiss. You know what you’ve done and you need to face up to it. Stop lying Dr Lent or your wife finds out everything - Anon

Matt’s heart was beating even faster somehow and as a doctor he knew that wasn’t good. Stop lying Dr Lent. What could that mean? Matt lied about so much, he had so many secrets he wasn’t sure he could even remember all of them.

Lying about what? What are you talking about?

Matt had almost completely forgotten he was at work, he’d be in trouble if he was caught on his phone like this but he didn’t care. He needed to get to the bottom of this.

If you don’t know I can’t help you. Figure it out Dr Lent or your wife will find out about your extracurricular activities - Anon

How was this fair? He was being blackmailed and he didn’t even know what for? How the hell was he supposed to figure it out without them telling him? He felt like he was spiralling, he felt like he might throw up. What was he lying about that this anonymous person was blackmailing him over? He was still holding his phone in his shaky hand when a voice startled him.

'Dr Lent? Dr Dardo is waiting for you to come and do your pre-op on his patient.’

Matt jumped a little and quickly dropped his phone his pocket. He looked up and his eyes met Shea’s. She blushed a little, she did that every time she saw him since her show at the Christmas party. Matt took a few deep breaths to calm his breathing.

'Dr Dardo’s patient?’ Why had he not seen that in the notes?

'Yeah, you know Dr Dardo right?’ Shea frowned at him.

'Yes, yes of course. I’m coming.’ He exhaled and ran his fingers through his hair. His nerves were shot. He couldn’t get that image out of his mind. If Naomi was to see it she would be able to tell despite the shitty quality and the weird angle that it was Matt. She probably wouldn’t realise it was Jason he was kissing but she would certainly know it wasn’t a woman. Honestly Matt would probably be less terrified about her finding out if it were another woman. He was more scared about anyone finding out he’d kissed a guy. So he knew he had to figure out what he was supposedly lying about before this anonymous texter sent that picture to Naomi. He didn’t even know where to begin, it would be a long list of wrong doings that he would have to scour through to figure this one out. That damn picture.

—————————————–

Jason stood in the corner of his patient’s room staring down at his phone.

Don’t believe me? - Anon

It wasn’t the words of the message so much as the picture that accompanied it. Jason’s face was mostly blocked by Matt but he knew if Courtney was to see it she would know it was him. His whole body was shaking when he heard the door open and he quickly pocketed his phone as Matt and Shea walked.

'Dr Dardo.’ Matt croaked a little and gave him a small nod.

'Dr Lent.’ Jason croaked back.

'Mr Rice, I’m Dr Lent and I’m going to be your surgeon.’ Matt turned his attention to the patient in the bed. Jason stopped listening after that. His mind was a buzz with questions. Who was anonymous? Why were they threatening him? What was he lying about? Honestly the bigger question was what wasn't he lying about. Lying ran through Jason’s veins like blood. He’d been lying for just about as long as he could remember. It had started when he was just a kid, he used to lie to his parents about dumb things all the time when he was little.

No it wasn’t me who drew on the wall.

I didn’t drop the cat out the window.

Yes I ate my vegetables. No I didn’t give them to the dog.

I aced the test, don’t worry.

As a teenager the lies only grew.

No mom I didn’t see anything. No I swear. If dad asks you were at work. You certainly weren’t at home.

No dad mom was at work. Whose underwear is that? It must be yours. Was she here with another man? Dad, you’ve lost your mind. She was at work.

Maybe lying was the only thing Jason had ever known because the lies only grew bigger the older he got. And with each lie, the better at it he got. Jason told so many lies he didn’t even know where they ended and the truth began. So for him to try and work out which one of those lies he was being threatened over, well that was going to be like trying to find a needle in a haystack.

He excused himself from the room and headed to the staff room. He sat in the corner and pulled his phone out.

What lie exactly are we talking about here? I have so many to choose from.

He hit send. He was trying to play it cool because he didn’t want this idiot thinking they’d rattled him. It was probably just some dumb prank anyway.

Yes I know all about your lies Dr Dardo. But I’m thinking about a big one. A life changing one. But you’ll have to figure it out on your own. Where would be the fun in me telling you? - Anon

Jason scoffed as he read the new message. This had to be some kind of game, clearly this person didn’t know anything about him.

You don’t know shit about me. This game is over, I’m not playing.

Jason had had enough of this. No one messed with him. Another message came in quickly.

I am not messing around here Dr Dardo. I know where you live - Anon

Accompanying the message was a photograph of Jason’s house. His blood ran cold for a second but he tried to compose himself. That didn’t prove anything. But then another message came in.

You grew up in Atlanta, Georgia. Your parents, Paul and Anita had a tumultuous relationship which you didn’t help with when you covered up your mom’s affair. You moved to New York for medical school. You met Dr Lent in your first week there at a party. You were drunk and you stumbled over to him and the first thing you said to him was “who put that stick up your ass and can I please pull it out?” You had your first sexual experience with a man that night, not your first kiss with a man though, that was much earlier. Unfortunately for you it wasn’t with Dr Lent though. You try and pretend he’s just your friend but you’ve been pining after him since that first night. You cried after you proposed to Courtney, not because you were happy but because you’d hoped she’d say no and she didn’t. The night before your wedding you called Dr Lent and asked him to meet you because you were going to confess your feelings for him but he didn’t show up. I know why he didn’t show up but that’s not up to me to tell you. Need I go on Dr Dardo? Realise I am not messing around. This is not a game. Admit what you did and this whole thing can go away - Anon.

Jason felt as though he’d been punched in the gut after reading that. How did this person know all this stuff about him? His mind jumped straight to Matt, would Matt do this to him? He quickly shook off that thought because there was no way Matt would be blackmailing him with that picture. Matt would die if Naomi found out about it. Who the fuck else could it be? Who would know those things about him? Matt was the only person that knew about Jason’s mom’s affair. Matt was sober the night they’d met and he probably would remember the first thing Jason said to him. Had he told Matt about crying after the proposal? He wasn’t sure. But Matt would know why he hadn’t turned up the night before Jason’s wedding. But how would he know why Jason had called him? Jason closed his eyes and thought back to that night. Sure he’d been drunk but he remembered it clearly.

Jason dropped the empty beer bottle on the floor of his hotel room. He caught a glimpse of his suit hanging up on the back of the door and suddenly he felt as though he couldn’t breathe. Was he really going to go through with this? Was he really going to marry Courtney? He needed to talk to someone and he needed to talk to them right now. He found his cell phone and found himself stumbling outside onto the balcony, needing some air. He found the contact he was looking for which took a little while as he couldn’t see straight and he hit the call button. He held the phone to his ear and held his breath. It rang several times before it clicked over to voicemail.

'Hi you’ve reached Dr Lent. I can’t get to my phone right now but leave me a message and I’ll call you back.’

Jason waited for the beep and then he took a breath before he spoke.

'Matt? Matt I need to see you.’ He suddenly realised he was crying. 'Matt please come over I need to talk to you about something. It’s urgent. Like hella urgent. Please god come over. I need you Matt. I can’t marry Court, she’s not what I want. Please Matt, please come and see me.’ He started sobbing and he dropped the phone on the floor. He fell to the floor himself in a ball and started sobbing uncontrollably.

Jason’s eyes snapped back open. It couldn’t possibly be Matt that was tormenting him like this, could it? What would Matt have to gain from it? But if it wasn’t Matt, who the hell was it? Who was this freak that knew Jason’s secrets? And how the hell was he going to make them stop?

#pearlet #pearl liaison #violet chachki #pearlet fanfiction #jason dardo #matthew lent

24 notes · View notes