#do you think Matt texted his mom to tell her he loves her and everything she did for him?

[circus-clown-calvary]

Do you think Renee Walker watched the Barbie movie and cried? Do you think she silently let tears shed at the end because she could only think of Stephanie giving her a chance? Do you think she would let Allison hold her hand in quiet acknowledgment of the vulnerability shared in the space of the theater? Do you think when they get into the car Renee sobbed because she is tough and she is strong and she use to be a bad person and then someone so deeply in love with humanity held out a hand to her; that Stephanie told her she was so worthy of love; she gave her somthing to believe in?

Do you think that Dan Wilds saw that movie and felt seen? That she remembered all the shit she was told about how she couldn’t amount to anything more then a side street hooker and knew it wasn’t true? Do you think Dan Wilds watched Barbie with Matt and he shed a tear for her because god damn it this is the strongest person he knows and how dare the word think she isn’t. Do you think Dan saw that and felt small because maybe she is just a little girl in a grown woman’s body holding the weight of the world, her world, her foxes, on her shoulders? Dan, who has had to fight for everything she ever had—she has to so she will — determination scared knuckles gripping at the womanhood she did not think she was ever allowed to have.

Do you think Allison Reynolds saw the mom in the movie and her heart broke because she would never have that? She could never have the mother who just wanted to be with her? The mother who would fight for her right to be a girl? Do you think she resonated with the way that it was put into words how she would only ever be seen as a rich man’s daughter, a gold diggers child, a trophy for some man to show off? Do you think she felt lonely when the montage of woman played because she would never understand the beauty of intimate family?

Do you think that these women who had to fight every battle imaginable — spit in the face of exhaustion because the weren’t allowed that privilege — cried in their room together. Holding each others broke parts because no one else will?

Do you think they would have liked the movie?

[lexisecretaccx]

A+ Student Pt.5

Masterlist!

(Fem reader, suggestive, kissing, smut, female!receiving, etc. Not proofread!)

Summary: Y/n is a great student in her college, always getting good grades. Her college professor Matt, thinks she can get even higher ones with some “extra credit.” That is until she meets her new gym teacher..

“She was talking about professor Sturniolo right?” Lizzy asks me hesitantly, I shrug. “Yeah, I’m not bothered though.” I lie unbelievably. “Pfft,” she laughs slightly, looking at me with a raised eyebrow. “You’re not bothered? You’re literally gripping your skirt so tightly.” I look down as the fabric is clenched in my fists. I let go and laugh slightly, “I guess I do care a little bit.” I sigh.

Chris’ POV

I type up on my laptop plans for the next lesson with y/n’s class, gotta make it easier because I don’t want y/n to struggle. “Mr Sturniolo?” I look up, a woman in a fitted suit jacket with a pencil skirt is staring down at me with her arms crossed. “Uh yeah?” I reply in a confused tone. “I’m gonna need you to come with me please.” She states.

“Okay.. where are we going?” I ask slowly. “The Principal’s office, an anonymous note has told us something we need to talk to you about.” She keeps her eyes forward as she walks quickly ahead. Oh fuck.. this isn’t about what happened at break? Nobody else was in there nobody could’ve heard us, or seen us..

“Everything alright Mr Sturniolo?” She doesn’t look back. “Oh, yeah.. call me Chris if you want.” I try to soften the tone in the air. “No.. I keep it professional.” We arrive at the Principals door and she opens it.

“Hello Christopher.” The principal smiles softly before dropping it. “Take a seat.. thank you Andrea.” The lady leaves the room. “Why am I in here?” I ask, trying to play dumb. “Do you value your job Mr Sturniolo?” He leans on the desk and peers at me from above his glasses. “Yeah of course, I love my job.” I smile.

“Do you respect the workplace and its rules and guidelines?” He asks again staring into my eyes. “Yes I do.” I nod, he grabs something from his drawer and places it in front of me. A mirror. “You seem to have a little.. a lot of things on your neck, do you not?” I look in the mirror at my neck, which is plastered in hickies.

My face drops, “Oh uh.. I had my girlfriend over last night I didn’t know-” I start to explain.. lying obviously. “It’s okay Mr Sturniolo, I don’t need personal details but make sure to cover it up, this is a first warning so you aren’t in trouble.” He smiles softly.

I sigh softly, “I’m sorry.” I scratch the back of my head, “it’s alright, us men like our women but sometimes we have to hide it.” He chuckles and I awkwardly chuckle back. I get up to leave and the principal gives me a little wave. I quickly rush back to the gym and throw on my jacket, which almost covers all of the marks.

It’ll have to do.

Y/n’s POV

I pack up my stuff and leave the sociology classroom, “I fell asleep.” Lizzy smiles as we walk to the exit. “Really? I couldn’t tell.” I sarcastically joke, she let out a few snores causing people around her to laugh. “Did I snore loudly?” She asks nervously, “meh, it was like semi loud.” I laugh and she groans in embarrassment.

“Right I gotta go, my mom needs me,” Lizzy rolls her eyes, “my aunt and uncle are visiting.” She sighs. “Does that mean?” I start to say but she finishes my sentence. “My annoying little cousin is here too.”

Lizzys cousin Theo is like 10 years old and the most annoying kid ever, he will tell his parents any gossip Lizzy says while she’s on the phone, he will constantly go through her stuff and he told Liz’s mom about my secret boyfriend 2 years ago and then my dad found out.. wasn’t fun.

I start to walk home as I get a text from Matt. “I have 2 hours where Chris and Nick aren’t here, at 5. Come over.” I smile and reply, “okayy.” I put my phone away and start to walk home faster. I hear footsteps running behind me, Mason. “Hey.” He smiles, breathing heavily. “How far did you run?” I laugh slightly.

“Just from the bench down there to.. here.” His cheeks are slightly flushed. “I thought you were an athlete, how are you out of breath from that?” I scoff. “I am an athlete y/n, I just didn’t stretch.” He rolls his eyes. “Why are you walking with me?” I ask him, raising an eyebrow. “Oh I am meeting my friends this way to walk home.”

“What are you doing in like an hour?” He asks me, breaking the silence. I look up at him with confusion. “Why?” I hesitantly ask. “I dunno if you wanna like get coffee or something.” He shrugs. He’s got nice intentions but no.

“I’m busy sorry.” I sigh, trying to act sympathetic. “Oh.. no worries, it was worth asking.” He smiles. About 10 minutes pass and I’m about to turn down my street, “I thought you were meeting your friends?” I tilt my head, “yeah I am, in the field down there.” He points down the main road and smiles softly. “Oh okay, this is my street so I’ll see ya.” I smile back.

“Bye y/n!” He calls as I walk away. He’s a sweet person but I just can’t find him attractive, hopefully he finds someone else to like. I walk through my front door to see my dad laying on the couch with a Pepsi in his hand watching sports or something. “Hey dad.” I smile, “hey pumpkin, how was your day?”

Pumpkin is the nickname he’s called me for the past 12 years, because when I was 6 around Halloween we went to a pumpkin patch with mom and I was running and fell face first into a pile of pumpkins and it went all over me. I cried but he thought it was funny to call me pumpkin after that. Now I find it a sweet nickname but I hated it when I was a kid.

“It was okay, I’m going out in like an hour.” I tell him, he nods. “No worries, stay safe though.” I walk upstairs to my bedroom and lay on my bed, spreading my limbs out on it. I take a deep breath before going in the shower.

After my shower I dry my hair and get dressed into a basic fit, I want to be comfy bc I know what’s gonna go down. I do some makeup, not too much, and I go downstairs to leave. “Bye dad!” I call as I leave, “see you later y/n!” I hear from the kitchen. I walk to his house, as it’s only 15 minute walk away, although last time I took a cab.

I finally arrive at Matts house and I see the expensive car is gone. I knock the door hoping Chris and Nick are not there. Luckily Matt opens in and smiles when he sees me, “I’m guessing either Nick or Chris drive the Porsche?” I smirk, “yeah Chris spent a stupid amount of money on it, I drive it sometimes too.” He explains as we walk in.

We sit on the couch, “Deja vu.” I laugh softly, “yeah, except this time I won’t freak out.” He chuckles, “prove it.” I taunt him with a smirk, he tilts his head and grins before leaning in and kissing me, this time feels more passionate.

His hand finds place at the back of my head and the other one on my thigh. My hands entangle in his hair as he pushes me back on the couch slightly, deepening the kiss. His tongue explores my mouth and I let out a soft moan as his hand rubs my upper thigh. He breaks the kiss partially to say something.

“Let’s go upstairs, don’t wanna make a mess on my couch.” He breathes out. I nod and go to stand up but he picks me up like a princess and carries me up the stairs, walking into his room which has a comforting vibe to it. Before I can take it all in he throws me down onto the satin sheets.

“Bet Chris didn’t do this did he?” Matt smirks as he slides my shorts off pulling me to the edge of the bed. “No, it was different because he had to stand and hold me the whole ti-” I start speaking but Matts hand covers my mouth. “I don’t need to hear how my brother fucked you okay?” He looks at me before removing my panties quickly.

He kneels at the end of the bed, his hot breath fanning against my inner thigh as he moves my legs onto his shoulders. “Gonna make you feel good, treat you for being such a good girl in class.” He peppers kisses along my thighs closer and closer to my heat as I squirm. I can’t believe I’m actually doing this with him, he’s had a change of heart now that he knows Chris fucked me first. He’s gonna make this a competition between them I know it.

He starts to kitten lick my folds to tease me, I whine pushing towards him for more. He grabs my hip with one hand, pushing it against the bed to stop me moving. Without warning he dips his tongue inside of me before swirling it around my clit. My back arches off the bed as I moan out.

He grabs both my thighs and pulls me closer, his tongue lapping at my heat. “Fuck Matt..” my hands travel down to his hair as I grip it tightly. He continues to swish and swirl his tongue around me, occasionally dipping it into me causing my back to arch and my grip on his hair to tighten.

“Matt.. I can’t.. I’m gonna cum.. please..” I whimper as his pace doesn’t slow. He hums against me, the vibration hitting my clit in the right way which results in me reaching my high and coming undone. He licks up the rest of my arousal before bringing his face up towards me, I wipe the sweat off of my forehead and breathe heavily.

He leans to kiss me, my arousal still on his chin and I turn my head away, “wipe that off ya lips before kissing me.” I chuckle softly, “you don’t wanna taste yourself? Hm?” He continues to try and put his face by mine, teasing and joking around. “Definitely not, it’s gross.” I squirm, “I disagree, I could have my head between your thighs every day.” He smirks, lifting his shirt to wipe the arousal from his mouth.

“Will you kiss me now?” He grabs my cheeks and brings my face to face his. I nod and he pushes his lips to mine his tongue instantly exploring my mouth, I bite his lip softly and he groans. “Fuck I need you.. to feel you.” He whispers lowly. “Please do..” I whine softly, “You’re gonna take it like the good girl you are.. yeah?” He asks, looking me in the eyes with lust.

“Yes.. of course.. definitely.. I will.” I speak rapidly, needing to feel him inside of my walls. He starts to unbuckle his belt, not breaking the eye contact. He begins to pull down his pants but then.. Slam.

Both of us look towards the bedroom door and back at eachother, “that was a car door right?” I whisper and Matt nods, he checks his watch. “It’s 6pm they said they’d be back at 7.. shit.” He re does his pants back up and I sit up, “get your clothes on.” He throws my panties and shorts at me. His entire tone and body language has changed and now it’s more tense.

“Jeez okay..” I put my clothes back on, I feel gross he didn’t clean me up or anything but I can’t go to the bathroom because they’re home. “What do I do?” I whisper, “just shut up a sec okay?” He snaps, “oh.” I sigh and sit back on the bed. “Matt?” I hear Chris call from downstairs, “stay here.” He spoke softly and I nod, “good girl.” He mumbles before leaving the room and closing it behind me.

I grab my phone from his dresser and open it, 4 missed calls from Lizzy? What the fuck? I text Lizzy, “hey everything okay?” She replies almost instantly, “No. But it’s fine now, no thanks to you though.” Fuck. “I’m pretty busy right now Liz I’m sorry.” I would help her right now but I don’t know what’s happening with me and Matt.

She leaves me on opened. Great, I don’t even know what’s happening or what her problem is. Matt comes back in and grabs my arm, quickly leading me downstairs and through the front door, “see you on Monday.” He whispers flicking his hand so I leave shutting the door behind me. So rude, I thought he was actually giving a fuck about me. It’s raining too, I’m gonna get hypothermia.

I turn to walk down the street away from his house and I hear someone call my name, I look up quickly to see.. Chris?? “Y/n? Why are you by my house?” He asks walking closer, my eyes widen in fear. “Uh.. I was.. fuck, I don’t know.” I lie looking down at my feet. “You stalking me?” He chuckles, I laugh lightly and shake my head.

“No, not that.” I sigh, “it’s cold and raining, you wanna come in for a warm drink or something?” He smiles lightly, I can’t go back in there especially if I just got kicked out by Matt. I thought Chris got home with Nick? “I can’t sorry, I’m going home.” I smile softly, “oh okay.” He looks disappointed. “You were in my house weren’t you?” He steps closer so we are inches apart.

“What no! Why would I be-” I go to like but he cuts me off, “you were with Matt. I know because I heard you shuffling around upstairs when he came downstairs to greet us.” He spoke sternly. “If you were inside then how are you out here?” I ask, looking up at him. “I watched you leave from my bedroom window, then I snuck downstairs and got out quickly to see you.” He sighs.

“So you were stalking me?” I chuckle, “you were the one inside of my house,” he laughs softly, “about that, what were you and Matt doing?” He asks me, but I know he knows the answer. I tilt my head at him, “we didn’t fuck.” I cross my arms, “I never said you did.” He smirks, “I’d rather not go into details.” I scoff.

“Mhm, he wouldn’t have been able to fuck you as good as I can.. right?” He leans down slightly and I shrug. “Right?” He asks again more aggressively. I smirk, “sure whatever you want to believe.” I go to turn around to walk away. “Let me drive you home, you’re gonna get wet ma.” The nickname causes me to turn quickly, “I already am.” I smirk, “in what way?” He tilts his head.

“Not the way you’re thinking, that’s inappropriate Mr Sturniolo.” I bite my lip lightly, “I’ll bring my car around, so Matt doesn’t see you.” He nods and rushes around the corner, the tension was so strong but the rain is getting worse I can’t think about anything other than my hands freezing off. The Porsche drives around the corner and pulls up, I open the passenger door and get in.

“Thanks.” I breathe out, he presses the seat heaters on and leans in the seat behind him and pulls out one of his jackets. “Put that on, you should wear it to school on Monday.” He smirks, “it’s a college not a school.” I scoff, “same thing, and I can take the jacket back if you’re gonna be ungrateful.” He looks at me before laughing slightly.

“You know.. I should be mad that you were with my brother but for some reason, I don’t give a shit.” He adds, turning on music, “Maybe it’s because you’ve got a bigger-” I stop myself, “a bigger??” He asks, “Ego.” I huff. “Sure, sure.” He smiles.

He pulls over for a moment “Wait where do you live? I just realised I don’t know where I’m going.” He looks at me, “we don’t need to go to my house right now.” I grin, “what’re you thinking?” He tilts his head, “I think we should go for a drive and chill out.” I smile.

“Does chilling out include you riding me in the backseat or..” he laughs and I do too, “Chris!” I say and pause for a moment. “Maybe.. just keep driving.” I add. He smiles widely and starts to drive again..

A/n: I haven’t written this in a while but omg I’m excited to continue, I’m pretty busy with school atm but I will try to update asap. Also sorry for edging y’all with this.. why am I kinda team Chris tho 😖 and Matt is kinda an asshole sorry not sorry

@blahbel668 @mattsleftnipple03 @rac00ns-are-c00l4 @hysteria-things @mattybslover @jakevwebber @braindead4l @mattybearnard @st7rnioioss @junnniiieee07 @bueckerslover @fratbrochrisgf @sturniol0s @alwayssublimedelusion @certifiednatelover @freshsturns @riasturns @sturniololvrrr @maryx2xx @whicked-hazlatwhore @cammie4298 @sturnsjtop @sturnzblog @chr1sgirl4life @evie-sturns @milasturniolo @jaxyy219 @mattsturniolosbae @h3arts4harry @littlebookworm803 @realqueenofpepsi @elsxz1 @jnkvivi

[bitchinbarzal]

Hey! Can you write something about being Matthews date to bradys wedding and just thinking about your own wedding in the future 🤍

you’d flown into jersey late the night before the wedding, having to miss the rehearsal dinner due to a work commitment your boss sprung on you last minute.

Both Brady and Emma understood, they were more than understanding of the circumstances.

So when the morning came and you’d finally made your way to Natirar for the ceremony you were so tight on time you hadn’t even gotten the opportunity to see Matthew.

You’d run into Brady in the hallway but not your boyfriend, wishing him luck and fixing his tie when he gave you a “thanks sis!”

you’d texted Matthew that you’d arrived and we’re with the rest of the bridesmaids. Matthew’s mom gasped when she saw you in your dress, making you do a little twirl

“You look so beautiful! He’s going to just die-“

“This isn’t about myself and Matt”

She rolls her eyes playfully “i wish that boy would just ask you to marry him already! I want more daughters than I have sons and legally I am equal now”

When the ceremony started, Matthew was by the alter with his brother, who was rightfully in tears waiting for his bride but Matt couldn’t console him as soon as he saw you.

Matthew’s chest tightened and he couldn’t help the smile that grew on his face when he saw you. You were clutching the flowers so tightly he knew you were nervous.

When you reached the alter and took your space you finally caught his eyes and he watched as your entire demeanour relaxed.

After pictures, greeting guests among everything else at the reception you finally found one another, all but jumping into his arms

“Oh I missed you!”

“Hey pretty girl, you’re hard to track down” he jokes, kissing your forehead

“Tell me about it, i saw Mark, your brother, Jack Hughes, Quinn and your dad all this morning but not you”

“You’ve got me now”

You nod “That i do, dance with me?”

He led you out onto the dance floor, your head on his shoulder as you swayed to the music

“Ever think about it?” Matt mumbles and you lift your head, frowning at him softly

“Think about what, baby?”

“Our wedding”

You crack a soft smile “all the time”

He looks surprised “really?”

You hum, hand trailing to his chest and say “I wanna get married in Calgary”

“Calgary? Really?”

Nodding you respond “Calgary gave me you, it made us. If the team gave you nothing, the city gave you everything. It gave me my everything” he smiles softly at your fondness “Calgary taught us love, it taught us forgiveness, it’s where we had our first major fight, where we did long distance for that short time, it’s where we bought our first home together”

Matthew is in awe that you’ve thought so much into this “Calgary it is then”

“No argument?”

“If my wife wants it, she gets it”

You push away from him playfully “Not your wife yet Tkachuk”

He groans “Not yet, just you wait”

At the end of the night, with sore feet and dizzy heads you were back in your room and taking off your makeup while Matthew opened his bag and stared at the black ring box that he’d taken everywhere with him for the past year.

His moment of reflection was interrupted by your drunken shouts of “hey matty did I ever say how much I love you?!”

[chrissdollie]

eclipse part two˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆

♡ series playlist

♡ summary: you moved from the sizzling hot arizona to the depressive rainy washington in a small town called forks. it was terribly boring.. until you meet a gorgeous townie and fall in love. but what do you do when your childhood friend interferes with your feelings? ♡ warnings/notes: a matt sturniolo and chris sturniolo love triangle series, cursing, lowercase intended, use of "yn" ♡ wc: 3.3k

♡ masterlist

“hi lil!” you coo, bending down to pick up the kitten. she purrs softly at your touch before curling up into your embrace. you cradle her while walking into the living room where charlie’s watching sports on the couch. hearing your footsteps, he turns around with a smile. “hey kiddo, how was school?” you scratch lilith’s head, thinking of how to answer. you could lie, saying that it was great and you were already comfortable. or you could tell the truth and say, “weird. everybody here is weird. either too chatty or plain mean!” but you disregard both options, deciding to dodge the question. “why didn’t you tell chris i came?” you ask with a small smile forming. charlie shrugs, “my bad. guess i just forgot.” but there’s something else that wasn’t said. you don’t question it though; instead spinning around and walking through the kitchen with lilith resting on an open palm. 

the cold, beautiful boy abruptly popped into your head. thumping up the stairs while petting your cat, you start thinking up an apology for him. you creak open your bedroom door, shutting it behind you quietly. lilith meows as you plop down onto the floor, not wanting to lay on your bed in dirty clothes. “i don’t even know how to apologize. i mean, what am i supposed to say??” you mumble out loud, looking into your fur baby’s dark eyes. “i can’t just randomly be like, ‘oh hey. sorry that i was staring at your captivating blue eyes for five minutes like a creep-- i’m not a creep, swear it!’” you lift up lilith as you speak in a silly deep voice, giggling at yourself afterwards while she stares back at you awkwardly. 

you remember charlie has a small keyboard in the hallway, sitting collecting dust. you exhale, plopping your kitty down onto the floor while you stand up and walk out your door, her trailing close behind you. you look down at the keys, gently tracing your fingers along them. lily stands on her hind legs, her front claws pressing against your calf curiously. you grin, picking her up sweetly and resting her on the keyboard’s rack where old sheets of music lay. leaning down, you push the wire into the plug, bringing the instrument to life. you play a few notes, lily shockingly staying still to listen. you softly hum along then stop suddenly. you’d started a small song back home on your grandmother’s piano but never finished it. it almost looked like lilith sighed when you stopped. 

the following day, you’re walking to your first period with a confident mindset. you’re somewhat dreading today, but also excited to attempt to make amends with your lab partner. during lunch, you make your way to jessica and her crowd like yesterday, quickly scanning the room as you sit down. no sign of matt. you look all around the room again. his three siblings were at their table, but he wasn’t with them. so much for making amends. he wasn’t in biology either, and a small part of you hopes you're not the reason he’s absent-- that’d just make you feel ten times worse. always looking for an excuse to go shopping, you decide that to ‘cheer yourself up’, you’ll look around a nearby thrift store after school. feeling a vibration from your purse, you pull out your phone to see a series of messages from your mother.  hi baby, how has everything been? why haven’t you texted me yet? is it raining? tell me everything. hello? yn are you there? you want to roll your eyes and chuckle at her impatience. you quickly type back, keeping your phone low so you don’t get it taken away. hi mom. everything’s good ! i didn’t text you because i didn’t really know what to say lol. of course it’s raining, it’s always raining :( “yn?” you look up to see jessica and her friends staring at you with a confused look. one of them scoots closer to you and looks down at your screen. “oooh, who you texting?” she smirks, annoyingly smacking on her gum. you lock your phone quickly, putting it back inside your bag. “oh, speaking of texting, you should give me your number! we’re all heading to the beach in like two weeks, and you should totally join us.” jess explains, moving her hands around as she speaks. you bite the inside of your cheek. what would you do at the beach? it wouldn't be sunny, that’s for sure. and how far is it anyhow?? there’s definitely no beaches in forks. well, maybe that’ll mean some vitamin d. you don’t ask these questions though. you instead exchange numbers with jessica hurriedly before getting to your next class. 

when you get home, you get a whiff of the delicious smell of steak. you shut the door and make your way to the kitchen. "i didn't know you could cook!" you tease your dad, remembering how there were always sandwiches sitting on the table for dinner when you were little. lily stands on her legs against charlie's ankle like a dog. you grin at your baby before walking over to kiss your dad's cheek in greeting. he chuckles at the joke, "well, a little while before ya came, i decided to teach myself. you're big now, won't eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches every few hours."

once the steak was finished, you and charlie sat down at the small round table near a big window, eating silently as rain poured outside. it's a comfortable silence, you're glad he doesn't seem to mind the quietness either. usually your mother would be chatting it up by now, forcing answers out of you about boys (not that you ever liked any of them anyway, but you pretended you did to satisfy her). charlie coughs before resting his fork and knife down. "so how'd ya like school? you make any friends?" there it goes.

you nod, "school's good. easy. i have a few classes with this girl, jessica. she's very bubbly."

he hums a "good" and goes back to eating, deciding that's enough conversation for now. hesitantly, you start up again. "do you happen to know the sturniolo family?" he looks up chewing a mouthful of food. "the doctor's family? yeah, he's a great guy. we go fishin' sometimes." you bite your lip tentatively, wanting more. you play with the food on your plate mindlessly, thinking about how to bring up matthew-- or if you even wanted to. charlie scoots his chair back noisily, standing up with his plate in one hand and his other outstretched to yours. you shake your head politely, "i'm almost finished." he nods, walking to the sink to clean the dishes.

maybe you should forget about the weird situation, focusing on making friends instead. besides, the visit to the beach is in two weeks and you have no idea what you're gonna wear! finishing up dinner, you wash your plate before heading up the stairs, lilith trailing close behind. you drop your purse onto your desk, pulling out your phone as you do so. opening jessica's contact, you send a text asking for more details about the outing. not any more than five minutes later, she sends a response. hey! i totally understand, i'd wanna know where i was going too. and plus you dont even really know us yet. well the whole trip was nate's idea. you remember him right? the boy who's friends with chris? anywayssss, he's driving everyone to la push where he lives. he says the beach there is pretty decent! so bring your bathing suit you send her a thank you before shutting your phone. sitting at the desk, you wonder when chris'll visit. maybe sometime over the weekend. you really hope he does, you remember having so much fun with him as kids. reentering your password, you scroll through your contact list to make sure you don't have his information-- you don't.

before you knew it, the entire week had passed. it was like a blur, repetitive and dull. and you hadn't seen matthew again. over the weekend, you went thrifting like you'd planned. you didn't find much except for a cozy white cashmere sweater and a tiny pack of unopened hello kitty bracelets. you bought both obviously. you also went to the local library. that was disappointing. every bookshelf was so poorly stocked, you didn't even bother to get a card. you'll have to plan a visit to seattle or olympia because you will never be going back to that library.

on monday, a lot of people greeted you unexpectedly. you didn't get embarrassing stares when you walked in the hallway with girly fur boots and earmuffs, topped off with cute little gloves. it was snowing today and everybody was enjoying it far too much. when you were walking to class with nate, he stared at the tiny flakes like they were magic. the cold wind brushed at your red cheeks harshly. you love the snow, you never had any back home. a while ago, you bought all of the clothing you're wearing now just because it was cheap and adorable! your mother said it was a waste of money since you'd never have the chance to wear them, and they'd all end up being sold in a garage sale. you make a mental note to take a picture after school and send it to her.

nate finally breaks his romantic trance to face you. he laughs lightly at your annoyed expression while the wind blows in your face. you giggle with him before pouting. "shuddup." he scans you up and down, a small grin still apparent. "cute outfit by the way. very barbie doll." he compliments with a small hint of teasing. you smile brightly. "why thank you." as you two continue to walk, you notice a group of students throwing wet snow at each other. you move away while scrunching up your nose. nate chuckles and runs off to join them.

later at lunch, you stand on line with jessica and mike who were absolutely drenched in snow. you swipe some off jessica's coat while she picks out her food. you turn to the side for a moment-- just a moment when you see something unordinary out of the corner of your eye. well, someone. matt sturniolo in the flesh. "hellooo? yn, what do you want?" jessica snaps her fingers in your face, breaking your locked stare. you look back at the lunch lady, shaking your head. "um.. actually i'm not hungry." you mutter, leaving your tray and interlocking your arm with jessica's back to the table.

her eyebrows pinch in confusion, turning back at a similar looking nate. "yn, you need to eat lunch." you ignore her, sitting down at your usual seat. you take in a breath to calm yourself. gosh, why're you so anxious? you have nothing to worry about! you didn't do anything wrong... drowning out jessica's complaints and questions, you hide your face from the table, using the person sitting in front of you as a shield. you feel a little silly though. why should you be hiding? you bite the inside of your cheek shyly before moving your head up slightly to catch a glimpse of the group.

matt and madison were laughing with wet snow dripping from their hair. you catch yourself smiling at matt’s joyful face, quickly switching back to a neutral frown when you realize. but aside from the happiness and laughter, he looks different. his skin is less chalky-- maybe flushed from the freezing snow. the dark circles under his eyes are less noticeable too. you ponder while staring like you did the first day you saw them, except this time you’re only looking at matthew.

“yn!! what are you looking at?” jessica asks, turning her head to follow the direction of your eyes. at that exact moment, matt picks up his head to make direct eye contact with you. he doesn’t look harsh or unfriendly, but curious. he stares at you like a piero piccioni song or some sort of divine poetry. you look down shamefully, heat rising to your cheeks. jessica giggles, “matt’s looking at youuu..” she pokes your shoulder. you keep your eyes on the table. “does he look angry?” you whisper, though you meant to speak louder. she raises an eyebrow at this. “no.. why would he?” 

feeling queasy, you fiddle with the pretty rings on your fingers. “i don’t think he likes me very much.” you mutter girlishly, brushing some hair in your face to block your view of him even more. she chuckles irritatingly. “you say that like a 19th-century girl. besides, i think he does, the creep won’t stop staring.” she looks back at him with a stank face, waiting for his gawking to stop. you’re not able to see, but he doesn’t bother to meet jessica’s eyes. he looks at you with some sort of admiration.. it’s odd. it irks the girl, not that she’d admit it. 

you watch jess and her friends eat, buzzing about who slept with who. you ignore the conversation as well as the fluttery butterflies in your stomach at the thought of sitting next to matt again. you hope he stays this way, approachable and gentle looking. you like him better wearing a cheesy smile than a mean snarl. when the time comes, you get to the classroom before him (surprisingly), dusting little flakes off your skirt before they melt. you readjust your earmuffs before you hear the chair next to you creak. you don’t turn to look at him, already feeling apprehensive and shy. “hi,” said a quiet, soft voice. you swallow, looking up at him with doe eyes. he has a gentle, friendly smile on his dazzling face, something you didn’t expect. “i’m matthew sturniolo, i didn’t introduce myself last week. you’re yn swan, right?” you flick your pencil between two fingers while he speaks in a musical tone. you nod meekly, smiling back kindly. 

a box filled with slides is placed in front of you two. your teacher walks down the aisle, leaving boxes on desks while explaining the lab. “the slides in your boxes are out of order. you and your partner will take turns separating the slides of onion root tip cells into the phases of mitosis they represent and label them accordingly. any questions?” you look at the boy next to you, he doesn’t look bothered at all. maybe he’s done this before too. your teacher gave the go, and students begin to decipher the phases. matt lightly taps the pads of his fingers against the table. “ladies first.” he grins so beautifully that you don’t respond. yknow, like an idiot. you grab the first slide, snapping it into place under the microscope before adjusting it to the 40X objective. “prophase,” you state confidently, pulling away from the tool. 

matt raises an eyebrow. he points towards the microscope. “you mind if i look?” you let out an airy “nuh uh” and push it towards him. he looks in, almost immediately agreeing. he switches out the first slide for the second. “anaphase.” he murmurs, writing it down below the first slide. you reach your hand out, locking eyes with him. matt smirks knowingly, sliding it back in front of you. you can’t help but allow the corners of your lips to turn up softly, you’re a naturally smiley person. he watches you examine the slide before taking it out. you both finish the assignment before anyone else. huffing, you grow bored after a minute of being finished. you swivel your head to matt. you notice another subtle difference in his face. his eyes are a different color. “did you get contacts?” you blurt out randomly, clearly not thinking before you did. his eyebrows pinch slightly in confusion. he shakes his head dismissively. 

there’s no way he’s not lying. you vividly remember his dark black eyes glaring at you a week ago. today’s a strange gold. but who has gold eyes? is that even a thing? his hands clench into fists again and you decide not to speak about it again. gosh, what’s his deal? minutes later, your teacher declares that time is up and walks around the room to check everyone’s work. he gives you an matt an A+ of course, you'd never expect anything less. it begins to rain, the water sloshing up the magical snow. “it’s too bad about the snow.” matt talks again, his eyes watching out the water-painted window. his hands are more relaxed, yet still tense. like he’s unsure about you. he moves his glance to you, waiting for a response. you shrug awkwardly, nervousness filling up inside. 

“you don’t like the snow.” he says, but it wasn’t a question. almost as if he were saying it out loud to himself. you sigh through your nose. “i don’t mind the snow. it’s pretty. i just don’t like the wet.” you counter. he smiles, “forks must be a difficult place to live then.” you shrug again. why's he being so nice all of a sudden? 

“may i?” his hand reaches out towards you, his head slightly lowered as his eyes flicker between yours and your hand resting on the tabletop. he wants to see your hand? your lips part, placing your hand into his. the skin is cold and soft causing a small gasp to come out. “sorry.” he whispers with a small chuckle before lifting your hand in his to admire your nails. you wait for him to call the sanrio charms childish or something prude. “i like them,” he says with a sweet smile, letting go of your hand. you don’t answer for a few seconds, taking him in. it’s crazy how just a week ago, he acted as if you were the worst person he’d ever seen. “you’re strange,” you grin sheepishly, the corners of your lips turning up more when he lets out a quiet giggle. a moment passes, and he decides he’d like to keep talking to you. “why’re you here if you don’t like the rain?” 

you have a bad habit of overtalking, though that habit has died down quite a lot since you moved to forks. well it seems like it’s starting up again. “my mom got remarried anddd the new husband plays minor league basketball, so he travels around a lot.. but she missed him a bunch since she wanted to stay with me at home. so i decided to send myself here with my dad, charlie. that way she could be happy with him.” 

he watches you talk with a fascinated expression, but he’s probably just being nice. you finish your explanation with a small look of glumness afterward. damn. you said too much again, and to someone may or may not give a shit. it’s hard to tell with him. he opened his mouth to speak at the same time as the bell rang. he gets up, swings his backpack over his shoulder, and runs out the door like last week. you suck your teeth before collecting your belongings and standing up to walk to P.E with nate. unlike a lot of people here, nate’s a very chill person. he doesn’t open his mouth with every step you take and is an okay person to talk to. 

you told him all about your trouble with any sort of physical activity (to which he chuckled playfully) and luckily, he was on your team today in volleyball. he guarded you the entire time like a loyal dog and won the practice. the class had ended a few minutes ago, and you were now walking out of the locker room into the drizzle. you see your lab partner leaning against his white volvo as you head to your truck. he clenches his fists tightly before noticing you, and sending a small smile your way. 

you make sure to text jessica later that day.  is matt bipolar?

you get a buzz back almost right away. uhh no. why would you think that? no reason

♡ tags ♡

@leah-loves-lilies @imtalkinnonsense @star-sturn @junnniiieee07 @mattsneezing @freshloveee @freshsturns @emma4eva @r6diosturns @matthasmywholeheart @donthugmeimhot @blahbel668 @chrissturnsss @joanofarcily @mattscoquette @slutsturn @imsosillygoofylol @joanofarcily @slutsturn @imsosillygoofylol @sturnioloremarker @ashley9282828 @jnkvivi @sturncakez @lanasturn @riasturns @st7rnioioss @mattsfavbigtitties @strnlxlqve @whosthislyssbitch

[itsstrange]

Karl Urban/reader story

Best friends for about 10 years. He is off doing a movie when she gets an invite for a function (you decide what). Calls him to see if he would be available to be her plus one. He say maybe but unsure.

He shows up late and helps with an ex who is harassing her (you decide how)

Fluff and ditching a little after to go hang out at home

A/N: I know you requested other ones before this one but I just had to publish this one first since I pictured this request all too clearly and was very excited about this one tbh, so hope u don’t mind this one being published first, your previous request(s) will soon be published love!! Hope You Enjoyed this one! 💚✨

To 10 Years and More

Fandom: The Boys

Relationship: Karl Urban x Reader

Word Count: 7k

Warnings: (No) Fluff, Slight Mention of Harassment, Mention of Alcohol, Comforting, Confessions, Kissing, Karl being an Absolute Gentleman, Friends to Lovers.

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Enjoy! 💚✨

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Together with their parents,

Rubie Jardin and Tomas Lockwood.

Joyfully invite you to celebrate their Wedding!

November 16, 2022

At 5:00 PM

The Colonel Ballrooms, 7577 Jacobs Ave.

See You There!

It read on the invitation that was currently in your hands, which you have been staring at for the past 10 to 20 minutes. Still can’t believe she’s doing it. You tell yourself as you continue to stare at the invitation. You weren’t gonna lie, the invitation was rather beautiful, its color was matte black with golden leaves as a frame, something that definitely screamed Rubie. She was obsessed with those two colors, you also wouldn’t doubt it if her dress turns out to be the same color, yet you wouldn’t worry too much about criticism she’d receive from the guest, that woman can rock anything and everything.

She did win Prom Queen after all.

Another disbelief, yet happy, scoff leaves your lips as you continue to stare at the invitation, still not quite believing it. It became realistic at the bachelorette party, but now, just a few days away, it all just seems like a dream. Never in a million years did you think, Rubie Jardin, your high school bestie, your rebel half, your partner in crime would ever get married, but here you are, staring down at the invitation to her very own wedding that would happen in a couple of days. You never really thought she’d settle down, she never picked you as the type to tie the knot with someone, but boy were you proved wrong. And you were glad you were. She deserved someone who would cherish her, love her for who she is, care for her in any way, and you knew Tomas was the perfect man for the job. He had found her queen and she had found her king, and you wished them both a happily ever after.

Only thing you weren’t happy about is actually attending the wedding, alone that is. Even if it said at the bottom of the invite ‘plus one’ you still didn’t have anyone to take, your mom was off the list, she was off on vacation with your father, Anniversary, your siblings were also off on vacation or out of town with their own family and you just didn’t really have anyone else you’d like to accompany you to the event. Your co-workers were a no go, you didn’t really have that close connection with them, yet, and the rest of your actual friends were already taking a date with them, and the thought of hitching a ride with them just didn’t sit well with you. Even if they didn’t mind the third company, you sure did, you felt a burden, so that was also a no.

Only person you can think of who would absolutely love to be your date uh.. plus one, would be the one person who is constantly working and constantly traveling for work. The thought of even texting him or calling him just seemed pointless, you knew he was busy, probably won’t event answer the call from how busy he is, but in all honesty you wondered if he’d actually answer your call since you hardly ring him up during work days. Also, you were curious to know what would be his reaction, Rubie along with multiple friends have mentioned how different he acts whenever you’re around. He doesn’t, they’re crazy. You mentally remind yourself but don’t realize how your fingers are already scrolling through your contacts until you’re tapping on his name.

This is pointless. Why am I even calling him he’s busy and across the country.

Yet you still put your phone on speaker before placing it on the island, waiting patiently as the line starts ringing throughout the kitchen. Your hands leaning against the table, fingers lightly—nervously— tapping against the marble counter while your eyes are casted down on the screen. After the fifth ring you thought about hanging up and sending him a mess to give you a call back whenever he can, but before you can hover your finger on the screen, a voice is being heard on the other end.

‘Urban industries,’ You stayed quiet at the familiar but non-familiar voice, then a smile tugs on your lips when you recognize it,

“Hey Jensen,”

‘Gotta tell you, you just brightened my night even more,’ He states over the phone, smirk visible in his tone,

You chuckle, “That so?”

He hums then continues, ‘You proved me wrong,’

“How exactly?”

‘Well, I always wondered who he loved the most. Me or his so-called best friend, but now that I’ve seen how he has you as his contacts I believe I won,’

“You think so?” You snark back, wide smile on your face,

‘Oh I know so. I’ve got hearts by my name,’ You can visibly picture a large, cheeky smile on the mans face, earning a heartfelt chuckle to slip from your mouth,

“You’re an idiot,” You comment with a shake of your head, earning a deep chuckle from the man as well, “Where’s the Kiwi at? Would love to have a serious conversation about our friendship,” Relationship.

‘He’s somewhere around here— ah, there he is, gimme a sec,’ You hear shuffling on the other end of the phone, then wind blowing in the background and then voices before you hear Jensen talking to another person, seconds pass before finally hearing his voice coming through the speaker,

‘’Ello?’ His Kiwi accent slips, invading your eardrums beautifully, easily making your heart flutter in your chest,

“Replacing me I see,” You playfully say, smile turning into a smirk when his soft chuckle is heard through the phone,

‘I could never,’ Karl replies

“I don’t know, he seems very certain that he’s won you from me,” The same smirk is still on your lips as you grab your phone to maneuver yourself around the island,

Karl chuckles once again, causing your heart to flutter once again, ‘We’re in it together. Till the very end, remember?’

Your smirk switches back to a large smile, one that has your cheeks burning up, both from pure happiness and absolute love. If only he knew how you actually took those words. If only he knew how you actually felt about him, then you wouldn’t be riding with so much hidden feelings, but you did, for so many reasons. Reasons to prevent heartbreak and pain. However, you’ve been dealing with said pain, every time you were near him, the urge to just let him know everything you were feeling, the urge to just kiss him stupidly until those feelings have been satisfied have been growing nonstop. But you held a firm grip onto those feelings to prevent them from ever spilling out because you just didn’t want to ruin things, didn’t need more pain nor a reminder about the time your best friend didn’t feel the same way about you.

So, you kept them hidden, and we’re going to keep them hidden until one day you were brave enough to share them with him.

It was back in 2012, it was the first day of work as the makeup artist on the set of Star Trek. You were having a conversation with another co-worker, sharing your guys’ excitement when the door to your trailer opens up, revealing Chris Pine with his piercing blues and right behind him was the one and only Karl Urban. If somebody would have told you it only took weeks to grow close with him you would have believed them, but if another person would have told you it only took a month to fall for him, and two years to admit it, you would have said that’s crazy. But it was the absolute truth.

You fell for him. Hard. But you knew it wasn’t right, he’s a successful actor and you were just.. a regular woman trying to survive the American Dream. You two would never correlate, he was always working, traveling, it has actually surprised you so many times how your friendship remained strong for these many years. Normally you never kept contact with actors you’ve worked with, but for some reason, Karl decided to stay in your life. Till the very end.

A question you’ve always asked yourself was, How the fuck are you still hiding it from him? And the answer you’ve always given was fear. That’s how you kept it from him, because you were scared of him, scared of what he might say, scared of what he might do, scared of losing him, that’s why you never slipped, and will not slip. It was too much of a risk, you love him too much to lose him.

Wait.. love?

‘So what’s up?’ Karl says, breaking you out of your own ranting thoughts,

“Hope I’m not interrupting anything,” You tell him with a apologetic tone,

‘Nah all good love, we’re just finishing up this scene before calling it a night,’ He reassures you, cheeks burning up at the nickname,

You look at the time on your phone, realizing it was barely 11:30 pm at night, meaning it was barely 1:30 on his end. Normally he’d get off from work at three in the morning, but if the director loves them enough he’d let them off until four in the morning, so it seemed to you odd he was clocking off work much earlier. Especially on a Monday night.

“You boys sleeping on the job?” You ask reaching into your fridge to grab a bottle of water,

Karl chuckles once again, then sniffs, ‘That’s all Jensen, poor lad is on his tenth coffee cup,’ He jokes then adds, ‘The temperature keeps dropping over here, and filming in an abandoned warehouse ain’t helping, nearly freezing my tits off, plus there’s a snowstorm coming in a matter of hours,’

You scoff in disbelief, feeling sympathy for him and the rest of the crew for having to work in the most brutal weather conditions in Chicago, where you on the other hand were cozy and warm in your apartment.

“Sounds like fun,” You sarcastically say as you make your way towards your couch,

‘Oh it’s thrilling,’ Karl responds back with the same sarcasm, but continues with, ‘How bout you? You alright love?’

Damn him and his fucking nicknames, you’re lucky he can’t see the way your face is fucking flushed.

“Oh I’m heating like a furnace over here,” Literally. “And I’ve got Harry Potter throwing spells at me,”

Karl groans into the phone, and lordy did that do something to you, immediately sending your mind into sinful thoughts. ‘What I would give to be in your position,’

You giggle as you stare at the screen, watching but not quite paying attention to the film, you didn’t need to, you’ve about watched that film more than you can count. Can visibly picture and say each line and scene with your eyes close as if it were the back of your hand.

“Maybe if you flirt with Richard he’ll let you go right now,” You smirk, knowing he too shared the same look,

‘I just might,’ He says with a short chuckle before adding once again, ‘Now what’s on your mind?’

He really did know you. Probably knows you better than you do. You’ve been avoiding the question since he spoke on the phone, but he picked on it much quicker than you thought.

You scoff with a shake of your head, dropping your phone on your chest, “I’m not even sure I should tell you,”

‘How come?’ Confusion and curiosity can be heard in his voice,

You stay quiet for a couple seconds, teeth biting your bottom lip from the nerves, “Because it’s pointless,”

‘Don’t be daft (Y/n). Obviously it’s not pointless if it’s got you calling me during work hours,’

“It is because I already know the answer to the question,”

‘Spill it,’ He simply says, firmness itched in his voice,

God you really hated him.

With a loud sigh you let your head lean back against the couch, you did call him, now you’ve gotta ask him.

‘(Y/n)’ Karl says your name with a slight warning to get you to talk,

Another sigh leaves your mouth again but the words fall freely from lips, “Okay. Remember Rubie?”

‘Of course,’

“Well she’s getting married in a couple of days..On Friday actually and—,”

‘Married?’ Karl questions with absolute confusion,

“Uhm.. yeah. Married,” Does he not know? He has to know I told him. He was there when she broke the news.. right?

‘With that one Tomas bloke?’ He asks again, Does he really not know?

You scoff with a soft chuckle, “Yeah him.. Don’t you remember Rubie spilling the beans that one Saturday night?”

He stays quiet for a couple seconds on the other end, making some noises with his tongue before finally remembering with a loud, excited, ‘Oh Yeah! Sorry love, been absolute crazy over here,’

The way he constantly forgets things brings a soft giggle out of you. Normally you’d think he’d be great with memorizing things considering his line of work, but it’s actually the quite opposite.

‘Alright, so she’s gettin married?’ He asks, which sounded more like he was edging you to continue with whatever it is you wanted to say,

“Yeah and— well.. I obviously have to go, she’s my best friend and all but..,” You stop yourself, silently inhaling through your nose as you look up at your ceiling, honestly regretting even calling him but continue with your question, “I..I didn’t want to go alone.. and.. I’ve got a plus one but got no one to take. And— well I-.. I figured I’d ask you,”

‘Right..,’ Was Karl’s response, hesitant and soft but then adds, ‘But you knew I worked,’

“Hence, pointless of even asking you,” You remind him, fingers nervously playing with the brand of your water bottle,

Silence hovered over you, definitely not helping with your nerves, but then you begin hearing the way he lets out a loud exhale through his nose.

‘You know I would absolutely love to go. Not only to crash the wedding but to also be there with you,’ If only he knew just how bad those words effected you, heart fluttering uncontrollably in your chest with cheeks burning, god how you wished he knew, ‘But I’m not sure if—,’

“No, yeah I know,” You cut him off, awaiting disappointment settling in your chest, “You’re busy.. you don’t have to explain, I get it. Why do you think I didn’t wanna ask you,”

‘Yeah.. sorry love,’

“Honestly Karl don’t be. You’re busy, plus I’m sure it’ll probably be difficult to even get the day off. It’s understandable,” You reassure him, fingers now playing with the corner of your pillow,

You weren’t sure, but you definitely think you heard a disappointed sigh on the other end of the phone, or maybe it was the wind? Either way, you too felt disappointed, even if you knew it was coming it still sucked knowing he’d most likely miss the wedding and would have to decline being your plus-one. Yet, despite the disappointment, you felt somewhat relieved knowing he didn’t reject your offer, reject you. Not that it proved your friends theory. He just couldn’t make it.

That’s it.

While you continued playing with the corner of your pillow, you hear Karl speak to someone on his end, then hear another loud, exhausted sigh escape from him. A small knowingly smile creeps on your lips when you recognize that sigh.

“Duty calls?” You ask, which he response with a short yawn,

‘Yeah,’

“Go. Finish the scene so you can catch some shut eye,” You tell him, even if you didn’t want to end the call you knew you had to, he needed to get back to work,

‘Alright love.. I’ll give you a call later on,’ He says with another small sigh,

“Okay. Goodnight,”

‘Night love,’

At his words you both end the call. Grabbing your phone from your chest you toss it to the side on the couch with a disappointed sigh. You stare at your phone for a couple seconds, replaying the conversation in your head, feeling the way your chest warms up when you heard his voice again after weeks of not being able to communicate. You always did enjoy your guys’ conversations, but now, with these feelings growing every minute, it just felt different, it was a different kind of happiness, it felt much more.. stronger. You couldn’t describe it other than feeling like the sun was constantly shining around you every time you’d hear his voice.

And it was a feeling you wished you’d feel everyday, wished it was the same feeling he felt, but knew that wish would never fully fulfill, because not every wish finds their way.

*****

Four Days Later

The wedding was absolutely beautiful. She looked absolutely incredible. The venue, the theme, the colors, her dress was just beyond perfect in your eyes, everything was just beautiful. That’s all you can say to describe the day. Things were going great, large smiles, heartfelt laughters, happy tears were being shared all around, you on the other hand we’re glad you decided to put waterproof everything because you definitely went through at least six pieces of tissues. Nonstop, happy tears rolled down your cheeks as Rubie made her way down the aisle with her grandfather, taking her fathers place considering he was no longer with us but proudly watching from above, the way they both shared their vows, promising each other to always protect and give unconditional love and support, then came the rings and the kiss. Then Husband and Wife.

You cheered with everyone, hugging Rubie’s mother with pure joy, new tears rolling down your face as you watched the newly wed wave with large smiles on their face. Everything was just beautiful.

Everything was going great after. Once everyone ate, everybody began enjoying the rest of the day with the newly wed. Drinks, laughter, more tears, chatter, pictures were being shared around the entire venue. You were sure you had thousands of great photos with friends and the newly wed, great memories to look back to, however, despite enjoying the night, you wished a certain someone was there to enjoy it with you. He had called you two days before the wedding to let you know he definitely wouldn’t be able to make it to the wedding, claiming they had to makeup the day for canceling the previous day due to flash floods, again you reassured him it was fine and completely understandable, but you still couldn’t help the way your heart shattered knowing you wouldn’t be seeing him anytime soon.

But even then, you still sent him pictures of the day, of the venue, of you and Rubie and even managed to sneak in a small FaceTime call, but had to cut it short since he claimed he had to go back to work. That was a couple of hours ago, ever since the call you tried to busy yourself by having a couple drinks with friends, chatting, laughing, even dancing with friends and the bride. The night was going splendid, definitely a night to remember, until it wasn’t.

You parted away from your group, claiming you had to use the restroom. Once that was taken care of, you began walking in the direction of the bar where you ordered your preferred drink and waited patiently. A smile would come across your lips every once and a while as you watched Rubie dance with her new husband to a slow song, it was such a memorable scene, making you wonder if you would ever get to experience such a beautiful moment too. Your thoughts were soon brought out by the bartender placing your drink on the counter, once thanking him and giving him a tip, which he sends you an appreciative smile, you turn to walk away, but was stopped by the one man you had been avoiding throughout the whole day.

Mason Peerson. Better known as your shit head of an ex-boyfriend.

“Hey,” He greets you with that all too familiar smirk, causing dark memories to resurface in your mind,

“Mason,” You say his name with pure disdain, distaste, causing an uncomfortable knot to start forming at the pit of your stomach when his smirk only darkens at your tone, clearly finding your hatred amusing,

“It’s been a while,” He starts, leaning one elbow on the counter of the bar, smirk still plastered on his face,

“Sure has,” You respond shortly, wanting nothing more than to leave this conversation, leave him, but you knew walking away from him was pointless, he was like a piece gum stuck to the bottom of your shoe once stepped on,

He won’t leave you alone. Yet, you were actually surprised he hadn’t bothered you earlier, then again, you never did leave your armor of friends. Trying to get through them was like trying to get through a pack of viscous wolves, it was pointless to even try and it was incredibly dangerous. For him, anyways. They all knew the way he had mistreated you during the last few moments of your relationship, witnessed multiple times where you both would constantly argue over the smallest things, even witnessed how he had brought your insecurities even lower, causing you to dig yourself into a dark hole, which took a lot of convincing and patience to bring you out of.

Your relationship wasn’t always fucked. In the beginning everything was fine, great, perfect, he was perfect, in your eyes at least. He would do everything for you, would show you love, affection, the two years were just absolutely amazing, until it wasn’t. Things went downhill as soon as he began drinking nearly every weekend, then the drinking switched from twice of the week to drinking nearly every day. Then came the arguments, then the harassment, not physical, but verbally, which ruined you mentally. Things between you two were just fucked at that point, no better word for it, it was just too toxic, it wasn’t healthy by any means, not anymore at least.

Family and friends begged you to leave him, to leave that toxic environment, but you couldn’t, you felt trapped by blind love, until you finally drew the line. One night, after a terrible “date night” you had stormed out of the restaurant after he had insulted you once again and demanded you to stop being so dramatic about your mental issues, claiming ‘you are not a child so stop seeking attention’ not only did he receive a list of profanities but he also received your glass of whine poured onto his head. Luckily for you, the security guards were able to step in between you two before he even got the chance to actually do something. One of them escorted you outside while the other kept Mason inside as you waited for your ride.

It was Karl who had picked you up. And it was that night that you had cried in his chest before falling into a peaceful sleep in his arms.

“Even after all these years, you still look good,” He gives you an unwelcoming compliment,

You give him a scoff with a disbelief smile, “Thanks,” You tell him, taking a step to walk away but a cold hand stops you by the elbow, halting your steps,

“Hey c’mon, can we please just talk?” He asks you, hand still firm around your elbow,

Talk? Seriously? Bold of him to assume talking to him was the last thing on my mind. You mentally tell yourself.

“There’s nothing to talk about and there never will be,” You try walking away again but his grip on your elbow only tightens as he maneuvers his body in front of you, blocking you from walking away,

“Despite looking good, you’re acting like a goddamn child still,” His light brown eyes were filled with that same old annoyance, irritation as he stared at you,

And oh how you wanted nothing more than to punch the shit out of him. You were seconds away from doing so, your free hand was curled into a fist by your side, you were just waiting for him to give you a reason, but before he could give you one, an all too familiar deep, loving voice settles behind you.

“We all good here?” You quickly turn around at his voice, watching the way his hazel orbs drop down to yours for a split second before once again averting them back to Mason, who had long since then released your elbow from his grip,

The look that was written in his eyes was the same look he displayed while playing his iconic role, Billy Butcher. Seeing it through a screen was absolutely incredible, but now, with him only an inch away from you and having that look in his eyes was pure intimidation, yet, arousing. But her didn’t need to know that. Ever.

“Karl. It’s been a minute,”

“Sure has,” Karl responds, tone flat and still, then slightly motions his head to the side, “Now how bout we leg it, yeah?”

In other words, fuck off. You mentally say as you stood between both men. Mason must’ve understood the true definition behind the taller man’s words because he softly chuckles before taking a step forward, but before he can even take another you quickly settle in front of him, stopping him from inching closer to the man behind you, who now had his chest pressed against your back. Not because he was going to launch at the other man, not that he didn’t want to, but because he saw how close the dickhead had gotten to you.

“Just leave, Mason,” You firmly tell him, (E/c) glaring into his own eyes as you continue with, “You’re really gonna cause a scene at your best friends wedding?”

That got him to avert his eyes from the man behind you to stare into your own. That’s the only reason why he’s even here, he was good friends with Tomas, they were like brothers so of course he was going to attend his brothers wedding, but if it wasn’t for him knowing Tomas, he wouldn’t have been there.

Something switches in eyes as he locked gazes with you, a habit that apparently never left from him. An effect that you just had on him, despite of everything that he’d done, you just had a way in bringing him down without even trying. He’d never admit it, but you were, and will always be his weakness.

Still keeping his eyes locked with yours, he inhales deeply through his nose before averting his eyes back towards Karl, who was still keeping a close eye on him. Then after a minute, maybe less, Mason gives you a small glance before finally leaving without another word.

“Never did understand what you saw in that cunt,” Karl comments once Mason was out of earshot, hazel orbs still following his frame as he made his way across the venue,

You chuckle as you turn to face him, “It’s called blind love,”

Karl remained keeping his eyes on Mason, watching as he made his way back to a group of men, then cheering and laughing with them as if he wasn’t just seconds away from causing a fight. As he kept his eyes on the group of men, Mason specifically, he didn’t notice the way you were observing— admiring—him. Dark hair neatly styled upwards, beard neatly trimmed, skin glowing perfectly—beautifully under the venues lights, then you let your eyes wonder throughout his entire frame. Dark blazer and jeans with a turquoise button up underneath— which you realized matched with your dress perfectly— and of course he had the first three buttons undone revealing his chest and St. Christopher necklace that you had gotten him a couple years back, causing a warming sensation to build at the pit of your stomach whenever you see it on him.

He really does not take it off. You tell yourself, remembering when you had given him the necklace as an early birthday gift where he then took it with a large, appreciative smile before slipping it over his head without hesitation. If you were being completely honest, that moment plays rent free in your mind at any given time, he plays rent free at any given time, but you’re not complaining nor will you ever admit it to him.

“You came,” You softly say, small smile forming on your mouth when those hazel orbs of his finally land on yours,

His entire demeanor changes as he locks eyes with you. Pure relief, joy, and happiness replace his anger as he stares at you. God how he missed your eyes, your smile, you.

“You called,” He simply states, then adds, “Plus, I did say we’d crash the wedding together right?”

A soft chuckle escapes from you, smile widening as you close the little gap between you two where two large arms wrap around your frame and tug you closer to his firm body. Your own arms wrap around his waist, fingers interlocking behind his back, trapping him there as your cheek rests against his chest. Despite the music playing loudly through the speakers, his soothing heartbeat still sounded beautifully in your ear, making your hold on him to tighten, which only widens his own smile. Hugging you tighter as well, he places a gentle kiss on top of your head.

“Sorry I’m late,” Karl whispers, lips slightly moving against the crown of your head,

You shake your head against his chest, “Doesn’t matter. Everything’s perfect now,”

The two of you remain in each others arms for another couple of minutes, just cherishing the moment for a little while longer until the sounds of cheering breaks the moment. Glancing over to the dance floor you watch as both Rubie and Tomas become the center of attention, a smile and chuckle escaping from you when they both show their moves to the upbeat music. Then you feel a hand interlocking with your own, glancing back at Karl you see him motioning his head to the side with a smile before gently guiding you to the table where the rest of your friends sat and cheered.

After greeting and hugging each one of your friends, he sits down next to you, hand once again interlocking with your own. You stare down at your hands then back up to meet his eyes, he only spares you a small smile before turning around to spark a conversation with one of the guys at the table, however, what made a smile form on your lips was the way his thumb would rub soothing circles against your skin, causing a warming sensation to rise in your chest and causing you to inch closer to him in your chair.

He’s just holding my hand because we haven’t seen each other for a couple months, nothing else. You tell yourself as you listened in on a conversation on your left but couldn’t seem to focus since your mind kept wondering back to his thumb rubbing small circles against your skin. You wanted to believe it was more than a ‘I miss you, I haven’t seen you for a while, so I’m going to hold your hand for as long as I can’ type of thing, but you also didn’t want to believe in such a thing, you feared it, feared of getting hurt. But the longer he held your hand in his, the harder it was to push the thought away.

Just stop! He’s only here for the night, possibly for a couple of hours, just enjoy the night, enjoy him while you can! You mentally curse at yourself when you start overthinking things, which is an annoying tick of yours, but as annoying as it is, you can’t just stop yourself. Thankfully, before you can even dive deeper in your thoughts, Rubie comes strolling over to your table with a wide smile, which only widens when she spots Karl by your side. Once thanking and hugging him for attending her wedding, she goes ahead and demands everyone at the table to join her at the dance floor, words slightly slurring, causing a few chuckles and cheers as she turns back around. Dancing her way back to the floor.

While everyone indeed gets up from the table to follow the married woman, you and Karl remain sitting down, watching everybody cheering as they make their to the dance floor with a smile. Then, before you know it, Karl himself is standing up as well, pulling your interlocked hands, a motion for you to go dancing with him.

Your eyes grow wide, “You know I suck at dancing,”

Karl softly chuckles, “That makes two love,”

With another small tug on your hand, you rise from your chair with a wide smile. At least you won’t be alone when it comes to making a fool of yourself.

You let him guide you to the dance floor, hand tightening around his own as he moves through dancing bodies, after what seemed like a minute of walking through a crowded maze, Karl is pulling you in front of him. A large smile spreads on your face as you two move with the music, even if both of you were definitely not meant for dancing, you both still were giving it all. Not caring if both your steps were off beat, not caring if you two were possibly making a fool of yourselves, you both were simply enjoying the moment. Together.

Yet, the night only seemed to get younger. As you two were dancing and just as Karl twirls you around, the DJ switches the song, causing the entire venue to erupt in loud, excited cheers as the next song blares through the speakers. Karl watches the way your eyes and smile grow wide the same time Rubie suddenly appears right next to you, then watches the way you both sing the lyrics to the song as loud as you both can.

‘Coming out of my cage,

And I’ve been doing just fine,

Gotta gotta be down,

Because I want it all,

It started out with a kiss,

How did it end up like this?

It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss,

Now I’m falling asleep,

And she’s calling a cab,

While he’s having a smoke,

And she’s taking a drag,

Now they're going to bed,

And my stomach is sick,

And it's all in my head,

But she's touching his chest now,

He takes off her dress now

Let me go,

And I just can't look, it's killing me,

And taking control,’

Karl remains standing still, quietly, just admiring you from his position on the dance floor, completely awestruck by you at the moment. Wide smile plastered on your lips as you sing the lyrics with pure energy, joyfulness, admiration, excitement, love. His hazel orbs never leaves your form. They were glued to you. He felt as if he’d look away, he miss the best moment, and that was you, dancing, jumping, screaming your lungs out to the song, hair going absolute wild from jumping with Rubie by your side. It was a fucking sight to his eyes. A sight he knew he always wanted to see, forever. Your smile, the bright light in your beautiful (E/c) eyes, just you. He wanted to see that happiness in you till the end of time. You out of all people deserved it and he was damn sure he was going to do everything in his power to bring you that same happiness you felt at the moment for as long as he lived.

It was that same happiness that made him realize just how much he loves you. Not that he didn’t know it already, hell, he’s been in love with you, but the way you danced and jumped around singing your lungs out only filled that love for you. Made it stronger, harder to push down, and that alone was enough for him to let go. He’s waited too long, has kept it hidden too long, fear and anxiety rested heavily at the pit of his stomach for what his heart has decided. He knew whatever he was about to do was either going to go really well, or he was heading back to the airport with a devastated heart.

Then you turned his way, wide smile, teeth and gum showing as you continue to scream the lyrics.

Oh fuck it.

With two long steps Karl towers over you, immediately holding either side of your face to roughly, but carefully, connect your lips. The sudden action made you freeze, body going completely rigid, eyes wide as your mind tries to process what the fuck just happened. Feeling the way your entire body goes stiff, Karl slowly peels away from you, scared hazel orbs scanning your entire face. His anxiety grows stronger when he still sees that same shocked expression on you, but then sees how a small smile starts forming on your lips, and before he knows it he’s being pulled back into your space, your own lips latching on to his.

A large wave of relief washes over both of you. Wide smile forming on your guys’ lips as you two melt into the kiss. Everything you both have been hiding, keeping it in a locked door, was now being poured into the kiss. Both your bodies were flushed against each other, your fingers tangled in his hair at the base of his neck while one of his hands cradled your cheek and the other gripped firmly on your hip. Keeping you in place as he only deepened the kiss. However, a loud popping sound has you both flinching away from each other, causing a large grin to spread on each others lips when you see confetti falling from the ceiling. Karl looks back down at you with the same grin, hand still holding its place by your cheek as his thumb gently rubs your skin, then drops his head low enough to softly rub his nose with yours, causing your smile to widen. It never leaves even when he latched his lips on yours once again, even when a roar of cheers is heard next to you, but that doesn’t mean you don’t shy away from the kiss and hide your face into his chest when you know the cheers are directed to you and Karl.

A deep chuckle rumbles from Karl’s chest, finding your shyness adorable, but only hugs you tighter before once again bringing your head to peck you on the lips once again. Definitely feeling the way your cheeks burn under his palms.

“Wanna get out of here?” Karl asks you with a smile, lips moving against yours,

Your smile widens as you nod your head, which he only chuckles as he pecks your lips once more before guiding you out of the dance floor. You shake your head with a large smile when you see all of your friends, including Rubie, still cheering for you as you make your way out of the crowd. You knew whenever they see you again they would demand you details and would give you the ‘I told you so’ lecture, which only widen your smile and brought a warming sensation across your chest.

Looks like you were proved wrong.

*******

Saturday

2:30 am

“When do you go back?” You ask, head leaning against his naked chest, fingers playing with his own,

You have been avoiding that question for obvious reasons, not wanting to know the answer when you knew it already. You wished you had more time, wished you could cherished this moment much longer, wish you could keep him in your arms, in your bed with nothing but your silver sheets covering your bodies, but you knew reality would sweep in. He had to head back to Chicago to finish filming while you had to head back to the theater where you currently were working as the makeup artist. As much as you wanted this moment to last, you both had to head back to work, back to reality, back to long distance, and that alone saddened you.

“Was actually supposed to catch a red-eye but..your worth rescheduling,” Karl mumbles behind you, causing your smile to widen against his chest,

“Am I?” You ask, raising your head to look into his eyes, small smirk displayed on your lips,

Karl stares at you, small smile tugging on the corner of his lips as he brings his free hand to place a strand of hair behind your ear, “You’re worth all of it love,”

You remain smiling at him, your (E/c) eyes scanning his entire face, embracing and enjoying the way he looks at the moment. His dark hair that was once neatly styled was now sticking out from every angle, his eyes and skin illuminating perfectly from the moon light coming from your window, everything about him, in that moment, was just perfect. Bringing your hand, the one that was fiddling with his fingers, you let them cradle the side of his jaw, fingers gently massaging his beard, earning a slight head tilt from the man.

Staring deep in his eyes, you let the words slip out, “I love you,”

A smile forms on his lips, hazel orbs growing warmer, “I love you. Always have and always will,”

“Always?” You question with a smirk,

Karl scrunches his face, lips forming into a small pout, “Maybe not always,”

That earned him a smack on the chest, causing a deep chuckle to erupt from his throat. Then after a few seconds, he goes ahead and places a warm hand on the side of your face, hazel eyes staring into your beautiful eyes, that he’s grown to love throughout the years, and not once breaking eye contact with his next words. His promise to you.

“Yes, always. To 10 years and More,”

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Tag List: @tiannamortis @lmarina2000 @would-die-for-bucky-barnes @strangesgirl

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-Hope y’all enjoyed it! Definitely enjoyed writing this one! If I’m being completely honest, this might be my longest fic I’ve ever written for Tumblr and I couldn’t be more proud!

-Again, I really hope you enjoyed this one @strangesgirl can’t wait to write your other requests!

-Make sure to Turn On Post Notifications!!🔔For more Updates!

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[fear-of-flyers]

holiday cards

my work for @buttercupjosh as a part of @antoineroussel winter fic exchange! enjoy kirsten <3

pairing: anthony beauvillier x fem!reader word count: 1.9k warnings: none that i'm aware of (ofc let me know if i need to add any)

Winter was by far your favorite season. It meant all of the things you loved: snow, warm drinks and spending all your free time cozied up with your best friends and family. It also meant that you got to spend all your free nights watching your favorite person in the world play hockey. You had been dating Anthony for almost 3 years and never tired of watching him live his dream. And it didn’t hurt that Anthony living his dream had led you to some of your favorite people in the world, most notably Sydney Esiason Martin. Since meeting her, Syd had become almost like your big sister. She knew firsthand what it was like dating a professional athlete but was also super funny and caring. The two of you connected on a deeper level and the connection had only increased when she had her and Matt’s daughters. You and Beau were one of the first choice babysitters and you were looking to Sydney’s advice for when you started your own family. For now though you were more than happy being an aunt and dog mom. 

Beau had surprised you with a chocolate lab for your second anniversary after months of talking about getting a dog. Her name was Amber, she was 2 and absolutely spoiled by Anthony. He went into it thinking the dog wouldn’t be on the furniture and now she had a permanent spot on the couch and in your bed. This was why you knew Beau would say yes when you asked to do a holiday card. You were at the Islanders game against Nashville during the beginning of December when Sydney was telling you about their annual Christmas card shoot and you knew you had to do it. Despite being virtually certain Anthony would say yes, you made sure to get everything you would need for the shoot before asking to increase the chances. You got matching PJs for you and Anthony and a bandana in the same pattern for Amber and used pinterest (and Syd) to figure out the general vibe you wanted for poses.

All that planning meant that when Anthony got home after practice the next Friday you were set to ambush him. At 1:15 a text from Beau let you know that he was on his way home and you set to work. You tied the bandana on Amber and laid the matching PJs out on your couch; on the side table you put out a container of Anthony’s favorite cookies and Amber’s favorite treats as bribes before sitting at the kitchen island to work while you waited. Not even 20 minutes later you heard a key in the door and Amber’s paws tapping across the hardwood as she ran to greet her favorite person. “Hey there Amber!” You heard Beau say, “How’s my most favorite girl? How was your day, huh?” You rolled your eyes at his words of choice, a small smile forming on your lips. “Most favorite girl?” You said, walking over to your boyfriend. “What does that make me?” Anthony laughed, closing the gap between you and pulling you into a soft kiss. “I have the two best girls in the world,” he said, “you’re both my most favorite.” You smiled against his lips, unable to help it. “Well,” you said. “Would you do us a favor then? Since you love us so much?”

Beau’s face immediately turned suspicious. “What kind of favor?” He asked, pulling his shoes off and placing them under the bench by your door. “A special one.” You replied, grabbing his hand and leading him towards the living room. “Did you notice Amber’s bandana?” You asked, turning back slightly to see Anthony’s response. “Yeah,” he said. “I liked it. Is it new?” You nodded to answer the question. “Yup! And it’s a good thing you like it!” You said, finally coming to a stop in front of the couch. “Cause we have PJs that match!!” You turned to him and were met with a look of confusion. “I don’t understand,” he said. “Is this it? This doesn’t seem like much of a favor.” You smiled a little, stepping closer to him. “Well, I thought that we could put on our matching PJs, then take a picture and putitonaholidaycardtosendtoeveryone.” 

“Woah there,” Beau said, raising his eyebrows. “We’re gonna do what? I just want to make sure I heard that right.” 

“Well, I was talking to Syd at the game Thursday night and she was talking about her family’s holiday cards. I thought it would be cute if we did one.” You said, looking up at Beau through your lashes, a move you knew he couldn’t say no to. “Just super close friends and family, I promise. Plus, they can’t make fun of you because it would be making fun of the other guys who do holiday cards; and no one’s making fun of Marty.” Beau sighed and pulled you into him and you knew you won. “Thank you!” You said, wrapping your arms around his waist and leaning up for a kiss. Beau indulged you and leaned down to meet your lips before asking when you were gonna take the pictures. “I was thinking tonight, if that’s okay with you.” You answered, your head not moving from its place in his neck. You felt him nod against you. “Perfect,” he said. “Just enough time for a nap.”

…

At Beau’s insistence you napped with him. And when you woke up about 30 minutes later you decided to shower and start prepping dinner while Anthony finished sleeping. Finally, about 45 minutes later you heard Anthony’s footsteps coming down the hallway and the telltale taps of Amber walking next to him. “Hi babe,” he said, arms wrapping gently around your waist. “Hi love” You responded, putting the knife you were using down and leaning back into his embrace. “How was your nap?” Beau rested his chin on the top of your head. “Good,” he said. “Turn around.” You complied, reluctantly moving yourself from his embrace. But you were glad you did because when you turned around you were met with Anthony in his brand new PJs. “Wow!” You said, smiling as you took him in. “You look wonderful! Let me finish chopping the zucchini then everything can go in the oven and I’ll change.” You said, moving to turn around and pick up the knife. But Anthony beat you to it, gently moving you out of the way. “Let me do it.” He said, pulling the cutting board closer. “You go ahead and change; we can take the photos as soon as you’re ready.”

You smiled at his thoughtfulness and turned to go change. In the bedroom you put your PJs on before applying a little makeup and pulling your hair back into a bun. By the time you finished and made your  way back to the kitchen Anthony was setting the timer for your dinner. You stood, leaning against the doorway, until he noticed you. He finally did when he turned to leave the room, a smile taking over his face. “You look good, Y/n.” Beau said and you could tell that any hesitancy he had before was gone; the excitement was shining in his eyes. “Yeah?” You asked, grabbing his hand as soon as he was near enough. “Always.” He responded, kissing your cheek. “Amber’s on the couch and I’m ready when you are.” Instead of responding you pulled him gently in the direction of the living room. 

Once there you set up your phone on the TV stand and got started figuring out poses. You ended up sitting next to Beau, squeezed close; Amber was sitting on the floor in between the two of you, her head half on your leg. And it took you a couple of tries but eventually you got the shot. But to your surprise the picture you ended up going with wasn’t one of the few where you looked perfect. You had gone into the photoshoot looking for something idealistic and came out of the experience with your new favorite family photo. In the picture you chose Beau was petting Amber who was looking up happily at you as you laughed at something Beau had said. There was pure joy in each of your eyes, joy you could tell was real. As you scrolled through the photos to choose a couple more Anthony and Amber got back from their quick walk. “What are you smiling at like that?” Beau asked, unclipping Amber’s leash and slipping his shoes off. “Come look!” You said, turning your phone slightly towards him as an invitation. “I picked the main photo for our cards.” As he started towards you the timer on the oven went off so you got up, handing him your phone on the way to the kitchen. And as he swiped through the photos you took your zucchini and chicken out of the oven and turned off the rice cooker before grabbing plates and setting your places at the island.

By the time you were finished serving dinner Beau had made his way into the kitchen and put out food for Amber. He got the both of you water before finally sitting down to eat. You ate in comfortable silence for a couple of minutes before asking the question you had been sitting on since you gave him your phone. “What’d you think of the pictures?” You asked, turning slightly to face Beau. “They were really great Y/n.” He said, pulling your hand out of your lap and squeezing it. “I had a lot more fun with it than I thought I would. Thank you for setting it all up.” You smiled at him, tension leaving your body. “I’m so happy about it. I can’t wait to make the cards and send them out. I love all the pictures but especially the fourth one, we look so happy.” At that Beau fully stood up and pulled you into a hug; “We are so happy.”

[bonus]

About a week later the cards came in and you spent an afternoon addressing, stamping, and stuffing envelopes. When that was all finished you walked with Amber to the post office and sent the cards off. A couple of days after that Anthony walked into the locker room and all heads turned to him. He didn’t quite know what was happening so he opted to go right to his locker and start getting dressed but when the staring didn’t let up he scooted a little closer to Mat. “Alright, what happened?” He asked, wanting anyone to say anything. “The cards bro.” Mat responded. “I’m pretty sure most of us got them yesterday.” Anthony nodded in realization, “Oh,” he said. “Were they bad or something?” He asked, now addressing the room at large. “No, just strange,” Oliver spoke up. “Not that it’s a bad strange.” Anders interjected, wanting to reassure Beau. “Yeah, it’s sweet kid.” Marty chimed in, a smile on his face. “Syd was saying that Y/n was talking about doing a card but didn’t know if you’d be down. It’s really nice to see that you did it; plus you look so happy.” Beau felt the smile taking over his face and the blush covering his cheeks, “I wasn’t super excited about it but I wasn’t gonna say no, and we are really happy. I would do anything for her.”

[deathofpeaceofmiiind]

high infidelity | eighteen

My mind turns your life into folklore I can't dare to dream about you anymore

*Ellie’s POV* After spending the most incredible day with Noah we decided to spend the rest of the night in our hotel room since we’re leaving early tomorrow morning. When we got back to the hotel room we cuddled in bed and had an unplanned nap together. The clock read 7pm when I finally rolled over and got out of bed. I was going to wake Noah up but he was sleeping so peacefully beside me so I quietly ordered us some room service. After that I went into the bathroom, did my skincare and changed into one of Noah’s shirts with just a pair of underwear on underneath. As I got changed my phone started to buzz, it was Danielle.

“Hey stranger.” I whispered as I slipped onto the patio, deeply regretting leaving my legs exposed as the sun began to set. “How’s my girl?” Danielle replied loudly. I heard music behind her, telling me she was at work. It sounded right up my alley, making me wonder who was playing. “Well your girl is staying at a very nice hotel with the lead singer of Bad Omens…I feel like I’m waiting for someone to pinch me.” I said as I looked back inside, seeing Noah starting to stir. “Well honey, I hate to tell you, this isn’t a dream…you’re dating Noah Sebastian.” The music got a lot louder before it faded completely, telling me she went backstage towards her office. “Was that Crown playing in the background?” “Yeah but they sound like shit and it’s not even their fault. Their sound guy got stuck at the border so one of the opening bands tech is doing it. Any chance Matt could teleport himself down here? I feel like he’s the only who could save this.”

“Doubtful, I’m sorry.” I chucked. She was right though, he was a beast at front of house.  

“Worth a shot. It’s a nightmare over here,  five people got thrown out already…I’m gonna have so much fucking paperwork tomorrow.” She sighed deeply. I had to laugh, I don’t know how she does it. “I would’ve invited you but I don’t know what is going on with you, also, what the hell is going on with you?” “A lot.” I chuckled. “Tyler got the papers, he just gave up and is giving me whatever I want. He’s putting the house up for sale so I’m gonna start looking for an apartment next weekend.” “I know my mom said Tyler looked fucking horrified and put his tail between his legs so I’m not surprised. How is everything going with Noah?” “Unreal.” I started, replaying this afternoon in my head. “We went to the aquarium this afternoon and I took him to Vieve for some drinks afterwards. Since Tyler is taking Liam to his parents for the next few days so I’m gonna go to Vegas tomorrow with Noah to see him play again.” “You just called me single in about fifty fucking languages, you lucky girl.” “Yeah, I definitely am lucky.” I said, still not fully understanding how I deserved to be in this situation, “Noah also mentioned getting his own apartment here because he really loves the city, and to be closer to me.” “Wow El, does that scare you at all?” “No.” I responded confidently, “Danielle, he told me he’s all in for me and I know he’s being genuine about it. I’m still going to have my own space, he won’t be here all the time.”

“Well, I trust you both and gold star for him moving to another country for you.” I breathed a sigh of relief because she was so protective of me and who I let in my life, especially after everything Tyler put me through. I felt a little guilty not mentioning that Noah was gonna stay with me first but I can save that for another day. “Just look after yourself and enjoy your freedom but don’t lose him in the process, he looks like he’d walk through fire for you.” “I think I’ve learned my lesson from doing too much too soon. All I know is that I’m definitely in love with him already.” I said as the door cracked open, causing my heart to jump a little. I looked up and Noah sent me the softest smile before kissing the top of my head. “I gotta go.” “Okay, text me when you land tomorrow?” “You know I will. Goodnight.” “Danielle?” Noah asked me as I stood up. I just nodded as he pulled me into a warm embrace, his hands ran under my shirt and caressed the band of my underwear. “This shirt looks better on you than me.” “Is it the shirt to the fact that I’m not wearing pants?” I joked before kissing him. “It’s probably that.” He smiled against my lips, his thumbs applied pressure onto my ribs, making me gasp a little. “I just wanted to let you know our food is here.” “Okay, I’m right behind you.” I said between the kisses he planted sporadically on my mouth. God, I never wanted him to stop kissing me, the taste of him was so addictive. We ate our food in comfortable silence while we watched a few re-runs of The Office. Noah kept sneakily running his hand over my legs, making me lose focus on the show. He finally had enough and grabbed me, pulling me onto his lap. “Is it weird that I feel like I have to pinch myself to believe that you’re real?” “No, because I do it all the time.” I whispered, pushing his wavy bangs out of his face. Noah brought his lips up to mine and took my bottom lip between his teeth. His hands went up my shirt and scratched my back, making me tug on his hair harder. My body started to grind against his thigh, feeling myself getting wetter by the minute. I wasn’t sure if women can get blue balled but after all the teasing and constant foreplay I was so desperate for him it was almost pathetic. “No, let me.” Noah silently replied as he brought his hand up to my inner thigh. He started gently rubbing my clit over my underwear, making me moan deeply. I’ve never met a man that was more focused on my pleasure than his own. His finger slid my underwear to the side and he gently slipped a finger into me, sending me over the edge. “That’s it baby, come all over me.” “I’m so -“ I couldn’t finish my sentence, my entire body surged and I felt myself drip around his fingers. My head dropped to his shoulder, trying to catch my breath. “That’s my girl.” He says, kissing my neck. I wanted more but he got off the bed and walked towards the bathroom. I heard the shower go and I fell onto the bed in a huff. I don’t know what special moment he was waiting for but I couldn’t figure out why he won’t go farther with me yet. I rolled over in bed and tried to stop thinking about. Moments later I felt Noah wrap his arm around my stomach as we both fell into a peaceful sleep, getting ready for our next adventure. 

[highwaytothedangerzone502]

Foxtrot Alpha Alpha - Chapter 10

Pairing: Hangman x Female OC

Word Count: 1973

Warnings: Discussion of bad home life, pregnancy complication

Summary: Hangman learned his lesson a long time ago to never show his true feelings when someone's words or actions hurt him. To do so showed weakness that could be exploited, and Seresin men couldn't show weakness. Of course, there was an exception to every rule, and Jake's always came in the form of women, three in particular: his mom, Juliette Kazansky, and the girl whose name he could no longer bring himself to speak. She was the girl that got away; she was his biggest 'what if' and his biggest regret; she would forever be the ghost that haunted his dreams. Jake believed that's where she'd stay, for he would surely never see her again after what he did.

Or so he thought.

Notes: This is the sequel to India Lima Yankee; I'm using the same callsign for the Female OC as in Ghost Story because I just really like it, but they are different characters; chapters in italics are flashbacks.

Chapter Songs: Closure Low

****

Hangman

Where had they gone so wrong? Jake had only one idea, but if that was the case, then he had no hope of ever formulating an apology that could suffice to make up for it. Besides, Annalise seemed perfectly content to act like he didn't exist, now or in the past and future. The behavior threatened to shatter him, but he was Jake Seresin, and Seresin men didn't break. So he sucked it up, pretended to be absolutely fine, and kept his aviators on so no one could see the pain in his eyes.

He did stay uncharacteristically quiet, so much so that he received a text from Juliette stating: You're quiet. You okay?

He sent a quick one back that said he was, but judging by her expression reading it, she didn't wholly believe him. Juliette relented for now, but Hangman kept an eye on her. Even underneath her makeup, she appeared pale. Rooster must've noticed, too, because he continually looked over at her even when she wasn't speaking. It prompted him to text Juliette almost the same question: You okay?

I'm really hot, and I have a stupid migraine. That's all.

Been getting those a lot?

Yes... I'm heading to the doctor's tomorrow. Be on standby in case it ends up being bad, and I need someone to help me calm him down.

Jake smothered a snort by clearing his throat. Not sure I have a calming effect on Bradshaw. Ghost or Phoenix might be a better option there, but I can be there to support you if you need it.

Thank you :)

Hangman shoved his phone back into his pocket. Rooster mumbled a question to Juliette, who whispered the answer in his ear and placed a comforting hand on his thigh. He covered it with his own, lacing their fingers together. Jake's gaze involuntarily shifted to Ghost, who sat next to Juliette. He ached to reach for her hand, to whisk her away and talk everything out until they were back on more than just speaking terms. He wanted to go back to the way they were before with the inside jokes, the time spent together, and their own personal, secret way of saying "I love you."

Ghost excused herself to go to the bathroom, and it took all of Hangman's willpower not to lie and say he needed it to, just to go confront her again, ask what he could do to make her forgive him, but he didn't. However, his buzzing phone and the surprising name flashing on the screen forced him to get up and head inside for privacy. Reluctantly, Hangman answered the call with a gruff "Hey."

Matt Seresin's tired voice replied, "Hey, can you talk?"

"I wouldn't have answered if I couldn't, but do I want to? No."

"I know you don't, but Dad told me he called you last week."

"Yeah. What about it?"

"What did he tell you?"

"Uh, nothing, really. He was asking how I was doing and if I was coming home to visit any time soon, which was really weird, come to think of it."

Matt sighed. "He's not doing well, Jake. Dad had a massive heart attack two weeks ago, and he's in kidney failure. Doctors are trying to save him, but in the event they can't... I'm just saying now might be the time to come see him and maybe say your goodbyes."

"Dad hasn't called me since I joined the Navy. He never even came to my graduation. Dad wants nothing to do with me, and I want nothing to do with him. Besides, he could've asked me to visit when he called me last week, and he didn't, so no. I'm not coming down. If that's all you had to say-"

"There's more," Matt interrupted. "I caught Nick embezzling funds from the company. I alerted the cops, and he's on the lam. I know you two were never close, but-"

"I was never close with either of you," Jake snapped more harshly than he intended. Reining in his temper, he said more calmly, "But if I see him, trust me, I'll call the cops on him and will let you know."

"Thank you, but be wary, Jake. Nick's armed, and he was always the most volatile. He has Dad's temper. I'm worried about what he might be capable of, and soon, you might be the only family I have left."

"Don't tell me you want to try and make amends now?"

"It's late in the game, but you and I have talked more since you left than you have to Nick and Dad combined. I'd like to think there's some hope for us, man. Besides, I'd like you to meet your niece one day. Sophie asks about you whenever she sees pictures of us from when we were kids, and she always loves the gifts you send her for holidays and her birthday. Don't make her pay for the sins of her father."

Jake sighed, leaning against the bar. He hated how his brother made a point. "I'll look at my schedule, see what I can swing, but only to visit her. I'm not seeing Dad. Maybe you can come here too. Disney isn't far from here; I think Sophie would like that."

"We've already been looking. I didn't think it wise to tell you until I was sure you wouldn't mind us coming to visit. Hey, uh, on a different note, I saw Coyote's post that Annalise was in town. You two talking again?"

Jake scoffed. "Pretty sure she'd rather talk to a wall than to me."

"I'm going to take that as a no. I'm sorry, man. I know how much she meant to you."

"Yeah, well, I caused the accident, so I don't blame her. Did you know she dated Kyle?"

"Yeah. It was only a few dates, but she dumped him, thank God. From what I've heard, he hasn't taken it too well. I swear that guy has a screw loose and will become unhinged sooner or later. Tell her to be careful and watch out. If he and Nick pair up-"

Jake pinched the bridge of his nose. "Ghost might be in danger."

"Why am I in danger?" Annalise queried, causing Jake to whirl around. He'd completely forgotten she'd gone to the bathroom.

"Is that her?" his brother asked, bringing Jake back to the conversation, but his gaze never left Ghost's.

"Yeah. I gotta go. Talk to you later, Matt." Hangman hung up his phone and fiddled with it.

"So? Why am I in danger?" Ghost repeated, maneuvering behind the counter and grabbing a glass of water.

Hangman sighed, unsure of how she'd react to the news. "Long story short, Matt's worried Kyle will become unhinged and that you'll be in danger if that's the case, especially if he pairs up with Nick, who's currently on the lam. He wanted me to tell you to be careful and watch out."

Puzzlement etched itself onto her face. "Why is Nick on the lam?"

"Matt reported him to the cops because he caught him embezzling funds from the company."

"Oh, shit," Ghost breathed. "When did that happen?"

"Not sure, just that it's recent." An awkward silence fell over them. Jake pondered what he should do or say, knowing the things he desired to do or say would do nothing to help the situation, that they'd most likely earn him a slap from Ghost more than anything.

"I'm sorry," she said genuinely sympathetically, which took him aback. He hadn't heard her use such a tone with him since before they'd parted ways. He never thought he'd hear it again.

He offered her a small smile. "Thanks. Certainly not the call I was expecting from him. Between Nick and Dad-"

"What's going on with your dad?"

"Nothing. Not going to burden you with that whole thing."

"Burdens aren't meant to be carried alone."

For some unfathomable reason, her words ignited an anger in him. How dare she pretend to care for him when she'd treated him like shit since she'd arrived? Stoically, he replied, "You're right; it's meant to be shared with someone who cares for me, but that's not you. Not anymore. You've made that explicitly clear since you arrived here."

Before she could respond, he turned on his heel and walked out. Jake realized by the time he set foot onto the sand that he'd taken his anger over his family situation out on her, which had been the last thing he should've done. If he had even the slimmest of chances of reconciling with Ghost, he'd probably lost it in that very moment. However, he didn't have long to mull over that because Juliette's panicked voice saying "Bradley" caught his attention. His eyes barely fell on her before she slumped forward. Rooster caught his fiancée before her face smashed into the table.

"Jules?!" Rooster exclaimed, cupping her face and turning it toward his. "Jules!"

Hangman froze at the sight, a flood of memories crashing over him. Ghost rushed past him, barking orders. "Get her on the ground and lay her on her back. Coyote, grab an umbrella and get her shaded. Phoenix, prop her legs up twelve inches. Rooster, keep her head and neck still. Mav, can you check her pulse?"

Maverick did as ordered, staying silent momentarily before confirming it was there and steady if not a little fast. Ghost nodded, checking the time on her phone. "If she doesn't wake up in a minute, we need to call emergency services."

"Already have the number dialed. Let me know when to hit call," Penny said, kneeling beside Mav. Hangman sank to his knees next to Ghost, casually placing his fingers on Juliette's wrist to check the pulse himself. As Maverick said, it beat steadily and swiftly. Meanwhile, the rest of the Daggers crowded around, blocking the view from passersby and staring worriedly at the friend.

Near the forty-second mark, Juliette's eyes fluttered open, and a small groan escaped her lips. Ghost placed a gentle but firm hand on her friend's shoulder and said, "Hey, you're okay. You passed out. I need you to stay still for a bit, okay? Can you tell me your name?"

Juliette stated her name weakly, then added, "Surname is Kazansky, but it'll... it'll be Bradshaw soon."

Rooster chuckled and said shakily, "Yes. Yes, it will be."

Ghost smiled. "And we can't wait to see you two get married. What's your fiancé's name?"

"Bradley," Jules answered. "Callsign Rooster."

"Very good. And you know where you're at?"

"On the ground."

"Well, you're not wrong. I'll let that answer slide. Last question: when's your birthday?"

"February 2."

"All right, you seem pretty coherent. That's a good sign," Ghost said, sighing in relief. "Jules, you need to stay lying down for a bit, okay? We don't want to move you too soon, but once we can, I think the best course of action is to get you to a hospital."

"Bob, can you bring my Bronco over here?" Rooster requested, tossing his keys to the WSO, who deftly caught them. "Mav and Ghost, can you come with me?"

"Of course," Maverick and Ghost said immediately. The former's face was a deathly shade of white as he held Juliette's hand. 

Ghost's head turned to Hangman. "Jake, you want to come too?"

Her question took him aback, but he managed to reply, "No, no, I'll, uh, I'll get Raptor and Lightning back to the house and watch over them until y'all get back."

"Here," Rooster said, handing the house key over. Hangman took it and swallowed the rising fear in his chest. Of course he wanted to go to the hospital with Juliette, but at the idea, he quickly reminded himself: I'll be the death of her if I do.

****

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Chapters: Chp 1 Chp 2 Chp 3 Chp 4 Chp 5 Chp 6 Chp 7 Chp 8 Chp 9 Chp 10

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[banannabethchase]

Set the World Alight - Chapter 6 (link to AO3)

~

It's Christmas and New Year's, and Matt and Nick have a whole lot of feelings in this week.

~

I am unable to resist a New Year's Eve scene, even when I'm writing in May, it appears.

~

Tuesday, December 25th

Nick

He wakes up to something smacking him on the chest.

“What the fuck?” he mumbles.

“It’s Christmas!” Matt says. Nick’s eyes settle to see his sister on his stomach, bouncing slightly. “Hi. Wake up.”

“Why do you hate me this much?” Nick whines, shifting so he can roll Matt onto the floor. To his disappointment, she rolls with it and lands on her feet.

“Do I look okay?” she asks. She’s wearing a black Deftones shirt that must be Mox’s and a pair of blue and purple pajama pants.

“Uh. Yeah?” Nick pushes himself up in bed. “Why?”

Matt turns just the tiniest bit pink. “These are, um. These are girl pants.”

“Yeah,” Nick says slowly. “’Cause you’re a girl.”

“No, like. Mox got them for me for Christmas.” She smiles a little, the pink growing stronger. “He said they were cute and he thought I’d like them.”

“Why are you telling me this?” Nick whines. “I wanted to sleep in.”

“Are they too girly?” Matt asks. “Like, is it gonna be obviously they’re girl pants?”

“Matt,” Nick says, “I promise. You could wear a shirt that says ‘I’m a girl’ and Mom and Dad wouldn’t look twice. You’re good.”

Matt relaxes. “Okay. Yeah.” She nods. “Thanks, Nicky. Love you.”

“Ugh, go away.”

He shoves the pillow over his head and locks the door behind Matt. Forget that they share the room – she can go nap on the couch.

The rest of Christmas goes by without incident. Like he’d guessed, their parents say nothing about Matt’s pants.

“Are you two still having Adam and Kenny over tomorrow for your Christmas cookies?” their mom asks. She’s curled up against their dad’s side on the couch, halfway through the third run through of How the Grinch Stole Christmas.

Matt nods absently from where she’s in front of the coffee table, putting together the giant puzzle Nick had gotten her. “Yeah,” she says. “I mean, I think so.”

“I’ll text them,” Nick says. Seeing his parents together, seeing Matt in Mox’s tee shirt and the pants he’d gotten her for Christmas. It makes Nick feel strangely alone.

You two dorks still coming over tomorrow?

Adam texts back first, like always. Yeah! 11, right?

Cool see you then. Kenny???

Kenny doesn’t text back until 4:30, but Nick and Matt aren’t surprised. He’s still trying to pretend he’s not spending the afternoon at Kota’s house.

“I don’t know why he’s trying so hard to keep it a secret,” Matt says, primly moving the puzzle pieces around. “It’s not like we don’t all know.”

“It’s his to share,” their mom says, and Nick catches her eye for long enough that he thinks he sees something there. “When Kenny’s ready, he’ll tell you.”

Nick hopes Matt heard that.

“Can I help you?” Nick asks, sliding to the floor next to Matt. He reaches out to grab a piece.

“No!” she shrieks, slapping his hand out of the way. “Go away! You’ll ruin it!”

“You’re the worst,” Nick mumbles. But he stays next to her, anyway.

~

Wednesday, December 26th

Nick

“I’m so full,” Kenny groans, flopped on his back in the middle of the living room. “This is hell. Why did you do this to me, Matt?”

“This is absolutely not my fault,” Matt says. She’s face down on the floor next to Kenny, legs curled up underneath her. Nick is doing everything he can not to kick her directly in her sticking up butt. “All I did was bake the cookies. You’re the one who gave yourself salmonella by eating all that cookie dough.”

“Adam, does it happen this early?” Kenny asks, rolling over to see Adam, who is scrolling on his phone.

“Does what happen?” Adam asks. He shifts, resting his legs over Nick’s lap. Nick is normal about it.

“Salmonella,” Kenny says. He rolls over on his side, gripping his stomach. “I hurt. I hurt everywhere.”

“Lay on your left side,” Adam says, setting his phone down. “Helps with digestion. I think. It might be the right side.”

“Oh, thanks, for being fifty-fifty on a way to save me from death,” Kenny says. “Matt, punch Adam for me.”

“Can’t,” she mumbles. “Still dying.”

“Nick, do what your brother isn’t brave enough to do and punch Adam,” Kenny grumbles.

Matt flails and shifts, turning to them. “Oh. Uh. About that.” She glances over to Adam who’s put his phone away. He’s also taken his legs off of Nick’s lap to go sit on the floor next to Matt, but Nick can be not jealous about that. He follows, scooting up next to Adam. “I’m not his brother.”

Kenny sits up, baffled. “You’re adopted?”

“God, you’re obtuse,” Matt says fondly. She pats Kenny on the cheek. “No, you beautiful dumbass. I’m a girl.”

Kenny blinks. Nick’s reminded a little of a confused husky with the way he tilts his head to the side. “You’re a girl?”

“Yeah,” Matt says, and Nick can watch the confidence shrink away from her. “I, um. It’s pretty new. But I’ve been trying to find a good time to tell you.” She shrugs. “So. Now you know.”

Kenny slowly breaks into a smile. “I think I knew that,” he says.

“What?”

“I – I can’t explain it,” Kenny says, “but, like, way back in fifth grade, when we all had that one sleepover?”

“One sleepover?” Adam asks. “We had, like, three hundred.”

“I know which one,” Matt says, turning a little pink. “Um. Yeah. I remember.”

“I didn’t say anything, because, like, wasn’t my thing,” Kenny says, “but Matt…” he trails off.

“I found one of Kenny’s mom’s dresses and put it on,” Matt adds. “I don’t – well, now I know why, but then I didn’t. And Kenny found me and just told me I looked good in blue.” She beams at him. “I didn’t know you remembered.”

“I didn’t, until just now,” Kenny says. “But, yeah. Got a name you want me to call you?”

Matt shakes her head. “Not – not yet. I’m still Matt. But a girl.”

“Matt but a girl,” Kenny says. “I can work with that.” He takes both of Matt’s hands in his and leans close to her. “Matt but a girl,” he says, “you fucking suck and you tried to kill me with your cookie dough.”

The four of them collapse in a pile of hysterical laughter, and Nick, not for the first time, is so glad they have each other.

~

Tuesday December 31st

Matt

“Okay,” she says, shaking out her hands. “Okay, I can do this. I’m gonna wear boy clothes and that’s okay because I’m not a boy, I’m just a girl wearing boy clothes.” He stares at the skinny jeans and the blue polo on his bed. “I can do this.”

There’s a knock on his door and she jumps half a foot. “Who is it?”

“It’s Nick.” The door pokes open and her brother’s hand waves. “Can I come in?”

Matt, dressed in a pair of plaid pajama pants and the Scene Queen shirt her mom had gotten her for Christmas, sighs. “Yeah, I’m good. Come in.”

Nick pushes open the door slowly, looking hesitant with a half smile on his lips. “You okay?”

“I – sure?” She doesn’t mean for it to be a question.

Nick looks on the bed. “Those jeans are – cute,” he says. He frowns, like he’s not sure those are the words he meant to say. “I mean, they’re good. They. I don’t know what to say.”

Matt sighs, sitting on the bed and blowing hair out of her face. “They’re fine,” she says. “But they’re boy pants. I’m going into the new year with boy pants.”

“Well,” Nick says. When Matt looks at him, his brow is furrowed, the way he gets when he’s super into a basketball game. “Okay, technically, they’re girl pants. Since you’re a girl and they’re yours, right?”

Matt considers it. “Huh.”

“And you – I mean, remember that shirt Aunt Marissa got me for Christmas?” He lights up. “Wait. Don’t go anywhere. I’ll be right back.”

“Where would I go?” Matt asks, baffled. “It’s four a clock on New Year’s Eve!” She hears some weird banging and a few thuds before Nick yells, “I got it!” and thunders down the hallway. He skids to a halt right in front of Matt, holding something bright and floral patterned in his hand. “Here.” He shoves it into Matt’s chest.

Matt catches it. “Um. Thanks?”

“It’s the shirt!” Nick says, excited. “Remember? I opened it and I was like, ‘Um, thanks,’ because it’s from the woman’s department and doesn’t fit me quite right.” He grins. “Come on. Try it. I think it might – I think you might like it.”

Matt nods. “Okay,” she says. Her voice is small. “Okay, yeah. Get out.”

“What?”

“Go away,” Matt says. She kicks at Nick’s shins. “I gotta change. Get out.”

“Jesus, I’m going, I’m going.” Nick flips her off over his shoulder. Worth it.

Matt pulls on the jeans – the jeans that are girl jeans simply because she herself is a girl, she reminds herself – and then pulls the shirt over her head. She’s never allowed herself to wear something like flowers before. It felt too much like a confession she wasn’t ready to make.

She’s ready, now.

She thinks she’d look better with some boobs, as she often thinks about any shirt she puts on, but she spins a little and looks at herself in the mirror, and feels a little more like herself.

“Can I come in yet?” Nick asks. “I wanted to borrow that button down green shirt.”

“No,” Matt says as she pulls it out of the closet.

“Why not?!” Nick whines, stomping his feet a little.

Matt chucks the shirt at his chest. “Jeez, quit whining. Yeah, you can borrow the shirt. Calm down.”

“You’re impossible,” Nick grumbles, but he pulls off his tee shirt in favor of the button up. “The shirt looks good on you, by the way.”

“It does?” Matt asks. She smooths her hands over the front of the shirt, and nudges Nick out of the way to get a better look at herself in the mirror. “It’s not too – too girl?”

“Isn’t that what you’re going for?” Nick asks. He does the last two buttons, then undoes them, then does one of them and messes with the collar. “You know. Girl?”

Matt opens her mouth, then closes it again. “Oh. Right. I forgot that was, like, the whole point.”

Nick smiles at her, and it’s soft and genuine and annoyingly kind. “You’re allowed to be you, Matty,” he says. “I’m gonna steal your clothes no matter what.” He claps her on the shoulder. “I bothered you when I thought you were my brother and I’m gonna be even worse now that I know you’re my sister.”

“That – that doesn’t help, Nick.”

He shrugs. “Kind of the point.”

“Hey, wait.” Matt follows him as he walks out of their bedroom. “What’s the whole plan for tonight?”

“Uh,” Nick says, shoving Matt a little so he can go down the stairs first, like a big ol’ brat. “Snacks? Watch terrible music on the New Year’s Eve shows? Yelling at midnight?”

“I mean with Adam,” Matt says. “Are you finally gonna kiss him?”

“I – what?!” Nick exclaims. “Ew. No. I don’t want to kiss Adam. Gross.”

“That would be convincing if you were a seven year old girl,” Matt says, pushing him into a wall.

“Hey!”

“You’re just chicken,” Matt says. “Ask Adam out, you dumbass.”

“Mom!” Nick yells, like a baby. “Mom, Matt’s pushing me!”

“Nick’s being a baby.”

Their mom glares at both of them. “Knock it off, boys.”

Nick immediately stills and throws a smile back at Matt. It’s appreciated. But still annoying.

~

Nick

“I am not going to kiss Adam at midnight!” Nick hisses over the fire. He pulls his jacket tighter around himself.

“I think you should,” Mox says. Matt’s curled up in his lap and they’re wrapped in the biggest, fuzziest blanket the Jacksons have. It feels unfair. “I mean, he’s clearly in love with you.”

“He is,” Willow says.

“He is not!” Nick says. “You guys are the worst.”

“I don’t see the problem here, Nick,” Claudio says. Stupid perfect European looking all comfortable in the 30 degree weather. “If the two of you like each other, why not make it official?”

“We don’t – I don’t like him,” Nick snaps. “He’s my best friend. I like spending time with him and playing with his goats!”

“So that’s what the kids call it these days,” Jamie whispers, but not quietly enough.

“I’m going to kill you, Jamie,” Nick says, flopping into a chair, unable to keep himself from pouting. “I’m gonna trip you on the court, and then do a magic spell, and turn you into a basketball.”

“Why is Nick committing murder and witchcraft?”

Nick slides off the bench onto the snowy ground as Adam walks in. He looks like a Greek god or something, backlit by the outdoor house lighting, and Nick is. Nick might be wrong about the not liking him thing. Damn it.

Kenny walks in behind Adam. Nick resists the urge to make fun of him for being a permanent passenger princess since swearing off driving the year before after an incident with a mailbox on his way to Kota. Kenny still thinks that nobody knows that’s where he was going.

“She was going into unreasonable detail about going down on Britt in the locker room,” Riho pipes in. Nick owes her a million dollars. And maybe another one of those bows she likes.

Adam wrinkles his nose. “Yeah, I’m too gay for that conversation. Nick, why’re you on the ground?” He reaches down and hauls Nick up like it’s nothing, and Nick feels like he’s about to explode.

“He fell,” Matt offers.

“I mean,” Adam says, slowly, “yeah? Obviously?”

“Maybe I wanted to sit in the snow, Matt,” Nick snipes. “Ever think of that.”

“Oh, here they go,” Adam says. But he keeps his arm pressed up against Nick’s while they sit, almost too close, on the bench.

~

“Who are you kissing at midnight?” Matt asks, sliding up next to Nick two minutes until midnight.

“Nobody,” Nick grumbles. “Leave me alone.”

“You should talk to Adam,” she says, bouncing on her toes. “Seriously. I think he likes you.”

“He doesn’t,” Nick insists. He turns to Matt, who looks so eager it almost makes him sick. “Please, Matty. I – I need you to back off on this.”

She shrinks back immediately, looking hurt with her eyes all big. Nick hates that look. Makes him feel bad. “I’m sorry,” she says, voice quiet. “I just. I don’t want you to go into the new year all pouty.”

“Fine, I’ll kiss Claudio,” Nick says, rolling his eyes. “Okay? I’ll kiss Claudio.”

“That’s…Claudio’s straight.”

“And?” Nick says, shrugging. “So are you.”

Matt’s misery disappears and is replaced with a dreamy sort of smile. “Yeah, I am,” she sighs. “I’m – I’m gonna go find Mox.” And she practically floats away.

It’s a minute to midnight, and Nick is stupid, so he walks up to Claudio.

“Hi.”

“Hey.”

“Can we kiss at midnight?”

Claudio blinks. “Um. Really?”

Nick nods. “I mean, why not? You’re the only one of us on the team who hasn’t kissed one of the other members, you know? Fun little way to start the new year.”

Claudio stares at him. And stares. And Nick’s beginning to wonder if he’s going to start the New Year getting beaten up by a giant Swiss god. “Alright,” Claudio says, shrugging. “Are you thinking a little peck? Or the whole deal?”

“Up to you,” Nick says. “I haven’t been kissed since, like, July.”

“Well we can’t have that, now, can we.” Claudio glances over to TV. “Thirty seconds.”

Nick nods. “Yup.”

They all count down together, Adam on the side with Willow and Riho, and Nick doesn’t think about how he instinctively knew where he was.

“Three, two, one! Happy New Year!”

“Pucker up, Nicholas,” Claudio says with a big grin.

Nick finds himself hauled in by huge arms and kissed with a focus that he didn’t expect from a straight man. When Claudio pulls back, Nick is pretty sure his entire brain just broke.

“Damn,” he manages to mumble. “Wow.”

“Don’t go falling in love with me, Nick,” Claudio says with a wink. “My heart is sadly stolen by boobs.”

“Cheers to that!” Jamie yells, hand up Britt’s shirt.

Nick glances around the room, gaze settling on Adam who looks…sad? Confused? Stressed? He wishes he could read that expression. He doesn’t know what it means, only that it makes his heart ache.

“Happy New Year!” Nick yells across the room.

Adam nods and takes a sip from his water bottle, and is quiet the rest of the night until they all fall asleep, piled together, on the living room floor.

~

Matt

Matt and Mox have snuck away to the den while the rest of the party celebrates in the living room, squished together in Matt’s mom’s home office. Hands are everywhere, and Matt is pretty sure she’d be willing to do something incredibly stupid if it wasn’t everyone she knew in this house right now who could walk in at any second.

Mox pulls back, breathing heavily. “We – we should.” He exhales. Matt’s a little pleased to see his pupils blown entirely. “I need to step away before I go insane.”

“I make you insane?” Matt teases. She leans back against her mom’s desk, running her tongue along her lips.

“When you do shit like that, yeah, you do.” Mox runs a hand through his shaggy hair. “Jesus, what’d I ever do to get a New Year’s Eve like this.” He smiles. “Best girlfriend ever.”

Matt sparkles with the praise, with the term, with the identity. “Yeah? You’re the best boyfriend ever.” She steps toward him. “I want to go back out before the ball drops, though.”

“I have a horrible joke about my balls I would make right now, but I won’t make it,” Mox says. His smile is crooked. Matt has to kiss it.

When they pull back to breathe again, Matt reaches for the door.

“You think Nick’s gonna kiss Adam?” Mox asks. Matt doesn’t miss the way he has to adjust his jeans before they make it into the hallway. She has to fix hers, too, but she’s far more discrete about it. Elegant, even, she thinks.

“No,” she sighs. “He’s too chicken. He’s convinced Adam doesn’t like him back, which is stupid, because we’ve all seen the way he looks at Nick.”

“Nick’s not too subtle on his part, either,” Mox mutters as they make their way back into the living room. It looks like nobody noticed they were gone, which is good. Adam is laughing in the corner with Willow and Riho, Jamie and Britt are making out on the couch, and Nick’s with Claudio, Cole, and some of the other basketball guys in the corner.

She makes the game time decision to pull Nick aside and ask, one more time, but he’s so resistant and sad when he tries to convince her doesn’t like Adam, she just feels miserable for him. Until, that is, he reminds her that she gets to be Mox’s girlfriend at midnight, and she forgets what’s going on.

“I’m – I’m gonna go find Mox,” she says. She meanders her way back into Mox’s arms. He pulls her in with a kiss to the top of her head.

“Hey, baby,” he says. “I have an idea.”

She pulls back enough to be able to look into those baby blue eyes, that look that can stick her to the floor before she can even think. “Yeah?”

“What if,” he says, swaying them back and forth, “you make a resolution.”

Matt nods. “Yeah. I – I was thinking about that.”

Mox smiles down at her. “You were?”

She nods. “I – I think I want to be out, to everyone, before I graduate. I want to start college as me, you know?”

He nods.

“It’s almost midnight.”

“It is.”

“You gonna kiss me?”

The rest of the room starts counting down from ten. And Mox kisses her into the New Year, blinding and beautiful and the best omen she could have imagined.

~

Nick

He wakes up with his face in something that is definitely not a pillow.

“What the – oh.” He freezes when he realizes his arm are around Adam’s waist, his body lined up along Adam’s back. “Oh.”

He blinks the sleep out of his eyes, realizing the sunlight streaming in through the living room windows is what woke him up.

Adam makes this little noise as Nick pulls away from him, rolling over. “Come back,” he mumbles. “Cold.”

“Oh, calm down, you big whiner,” Nick says as he grabs a blanket from Cole and Kyle’s mountain of them and drapes it over Adam. “I’ll be right back.”

“Good,” Adam mumbles. And he falls into a snore that would rival a jackhammer.

Nick runs to the restroom and brushes his teeth for good measure, then snuggles back in.

“Oh, man,” Nick giggles quietly, “Adam, your breath stinks.”

“It’s morning,” Adam mumbles. “Everybody’s breath stinks.”

Nick rolls his eyes as he snuggles back into his spot, this time curling up under the blanket with Adam.

It’s not until he wakes up again, two hours later and much colder, that he reflects on it.

He sits up so fast his head sort of spins, to see that he, Britt, Riho, Claudio, and Kyle are the only ones left in the living room.

“Where’d everybody go?” Britt mumbles. She and Jamie managed to commandeer the couch after a violent battle between them and Cole and Kyle the night before, but even she looks a bit more rumpled than usual.

“Probably kitchen,” Nick grumbles. “Floor’s hard.”

“it’s supposed to be,” Claudio half growls. “It’s a floor, dumbass.”

“You’re mean when you wake up,” Nick says. He throws a pillow at Claudio’s head, nailing him right on the top of the head, and scurries to the kitchen before Claudio can kill him.

“Hey, kiddos!” their dad says, grinning behind a mountain of pancakes. “Some of you sleep like the dead.”

“I don’t,” Matt says pouting. “Mox and Adam and Cole snore.”

“That wasn’t me!” Cole argues. “It’s Kyle. He snores so bad.”

“Adam was snoring this morning,” Nick offers, grinning over at Adam, trying to pretend like it was all normal, the way they curled around each other that morning.

Adam smiles, but there’s something tight behind it. “Sorry. It’s weird to be awake and not checking on the animals, you know?”

“I don’t,” Nick says. “But I get it.”

Breakfast is sleepy eyes and bright smiles, Mox and Matt holding hands on the bench while Matt does a terrible job of using her left hand to eat.

“It’s too cold to be eating outside,” Riho says, teeth chattering. “This is a terrible idea.”

Willow throws a blanket around both of their shoulders. “But it’s beautiful, Riho!”

“It’s awful.” She turns and buries her face into Willow’s shoulder, and Willow looks far more pleased about it than Nick would have expected.

With well wishes for the year ahead and yawns, everyone trickles out slowly, with Adam, Cole, Kyle, and Mox the last stragglers.

“It’s pretty this early in the morning,” Kyle says. “I don’t usually see the world from this side of 6am.”

“It’s ten,” Adam says. “And way later than you wake up for school.”

“I am not a morning person, Page,” Kyle says sternly. “I do not wake up fully until 12:30, and that’s on a good day.”

“He’s not lying,” Cole says. “And it’s weird to watch. Every once in a while he, like, wakes up in the middle of lunch.”

“It’s called multitasking,” Kyle says, looking weirdly proud of himself. “I can sleep and do mundane things all at once.”

“Is Mundane Things Cole’s new nickname then?” Adam asks, grinning.

Cole throws a pancake at Adam’s head. “You shut up.”

“Sorry, sorry,” Nick says, glancing over at Adam. “We forget you prefer being called ‘adequate.’”

Nick watches Adam peel pancake out of his hair, and suddenly realizes he wishes he was the one that got to mess with Adam like that. Wishes he was the one who was supposed to wake up with Adam like that for sleepovers.

“Oh no,” he half whimpers, looking down at his plate.

“You okay?” Matt asks, eyeing him.

“I’m good,” Nick says. “Just tired.”

[sincelastsession]

Today was shit.

The loudness factor has been insane. I live right next to the pool.

I called my mom freaking out. Honestly it is an unreasonable amount of noise and screaming coming from adults and children and every fucking noise canceling thing and sedative med isn't working. I literally just need to fucking move and AND the stairs are terrible on my fucked up joints back and hip issue.

I tried to have a D/s dynamic with Matt today and he's been a shit head basically not paying attention and he's human we fuck up I get it but today I needed him.

Justin fuckin messaged me about this good time he was having today and so I called because I don't want to text and fuck I don't want to type everything out but text to speech isn't working today because I need a new phone. Which my father promised to help me with.

Anyway then Justin immediately says he has company and can't talk....but he could text me and tell me a teaser line of his day so I'd talk to him?

Fuck I'd planned to say hi just because I wanted to but fuck him.

Petty ass man.

Hannah just told me she took benadryl and slept all day like she needed a fucking award.

I need help. I need to move. I hate living around the loudness.

I understand nobody can afford shit.

THEN MY MOTHER ASKS ME IF SHE WERE TO MOVE TO A BIGGER HOUSE AND HAVE AN ATTACHED HOUSE TO HER HOUSE DO I WANNA LIVE THERE????

She's either lost her mind or fallen for another fucking scam artist who she thinks loves her and wants to visit and see her in person and give her money and spoil her.

I have had to prove her wrong twice if not more than that and she has lost money to these people and other scammers people that said they were the governmentI have had to prove her wrong twice if not more than that and she has lost money to these people and other scammers people that said they were the government

This is insane I am so tired I just want to live in peace and quiet and be left to fuck alone so I can have time with my partner and many other that are peaceful and normal.

I asked my mom to talk to my dad about moving me and she sent me these screen captures which I will share with you. The green text is my mother the other text is my father.

The thing is my mom could very well help him out and she does max out her credit cards and she is addicted to shopping and that is why she as far as I'm aware has not helped very much on paying to help me have a place to live.

She has a job my dad currently does not.

This is all very distressing because the noise and the support beam and all the things I'm worried about are just too much and I really just need something simple and quiet.

I'm terrified that I'm going to end up in a inpatient facility again. I'm scared I'm going to lose my cool and flip the fuck out on some loud inconsiderate people.

I don't think that any of this is fair to me. I understand that people deal with worse but I am not those people and their life is not my life.

I'm sure that this makes me look spoiled but it's far from that. Because no one gives me money for anything I don't ask for money. All I'm asking for is for help getting a different apartment and patience with me while I get better to a baseline where I can operate or maybe I could get a fucking job and help everybody out so I don't have to rely on them.

I'm so fucking upset.

I have tried to sedate myself with my medicine like I'm supposed to take it and it didn't work today and I flipped out.

Idk what to say rn.

[st7rnioioss]

⋆·˚ ༘ * "I really want to kiss you." pt. 2

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: matt sturniolo x reader

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: part 2 to "i really want to kiss you", go read that! (im avoiding doing a summary)

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠: fluff, kissing, swearing

part one

a/n: i didn’t really expect to make part two, but here we are. just a bunch of fluff, no plot really LMAO.

───────── 🐇

Friday, 9:23 pm

“Hey, you home yet?”

“Not yet, still on my way. You looked good today”

“Stop, I’m blushing”

“What I’d do to sit beside you and watch”

“Matthew, you should concentrate on not getting run over. Cut the flirting!!!”

“Sorrryyy, I can’t help it, it’s not my fault you’re practically perfect”

“I LOVE YOI SO MUCH STOP”

Sunday, 8:47 pm

“Oh my God, finally! I can’t believe it took you guys that long,” Madi exclaimed on the other end of the phone.

“Yeah, he honestly kinda took me by surprise. I didn’t actually expect him to kiss me, but I had my suspicions,” you said, tucking yourself up in your covers in your soft bed.

“Tell me everything tomorrow at school, please! Also, do you think Nick and Chris knows?” Madi asked.

“Yeah, Nick texted me that Matt came home stumbling into the kitchen, yelling ‘I finally kissed her!’ and then proceeded to smile and ramble about the whole thing. His parents knows too,” you couldn’t help but blush at the imagination.

“Stop, that’s adorable. Anyways, I gotta go, I’m sorry! Tell me all about it tomorrow!” she said, the frown practically being audible.

“No it’s fine, Madi! I love you!” you said just before hanging up.

Monday, 12:21 am

“And then he asked me to kiss me again,” you giggled, taking a sip of your soda as you watched Matt turn beet red.

“Shut up, you’re embarrassing me,” he mumbled, playing with his lunch food as he looked down at you beside him. Chris was playfully hitting Matt’s shoulder, a proud expression on his faces, his mouth full of food. Nate was laughing at Chris, trying not to spit his food out.

“Finally! This was honestly painful. If only you knew how many times he came home just to ramble about you. Exhausting!” Nick sent a look to Madi who nodded, both smiling playfully at Matt. This made you blush, grabbing Matt’s hand under the table, looking up at him to smile softly.

“Well, he’s my boyfriend now, so you guys can stop complaining now,” you laughed, squeezing Matt’s hand. Matt sent a cheesy smile, giving your cheek a quick peck.

“Gross. At least don’t kiss during lunch,” Chris complained.

“Chris, shut up and eat your food with a closed mouth,” you mumbled, the whole table laughing at Chris’s offended expression.

Monday, 7:49 pm

“Matt, you’ve got to be kidding,” you laughed while yelling at Matt. You were walking on the sidewalk, the pouring rain rapidly soaking your shirt.

First he had suggested that you just took an uber home from the McDonald’s, but then he got the fantastic idea to walk instead. You liked the idea until it’s started raining heavily.

“Oh my God, my mom is gonna kill me,” Matt laughed, throwing an arm around your shoulder, looking down at you, completely drenched. In a white shirt, of course.

“Well, it was your idea!” you protested, crossing your arms because you got colder.

“Oh? So it’s my fault? You agreed to walk instead of taking an Uber!” he laughed, poking your cheek. You grabbed his finger with a soft smile, rolling your eyes at him.

“Stop fucking poking me, Matt” you lowered your voice, not letting go of his finger. He then eventually got free from your grip, intertwining his fingers with yours. He just smiled at you as an apology, and it sure as hell worked.

“Well, I’m enjoying myself. I like spending time with you, even if it’s in the pouring rain,” he shot a somewhat shy smile, his eyes darting between your eyes and your chest. He then eventually settled on your eyes, leaning closer to whisper in your ear.

“You’re so gorgeous, even completely soaked. I love you, you know that, right? I’m glad I decided to kiss you on that park bench,” he pressed a soft kiss to your cheek, making you halt your walk.

“Oh stop it, Matthew, you’re making me flustered,” you blushed, covering your face in your hands.

“Hey, don’t do that, I want to see your pretty face, just like I told you!” he giggled, grabbing your hands to lower them from your face. You locked eyes with him, reaching for his now soaked hair to move it out of your way, pecking his forehead gently.

“I love you way more,” you cheekily smiled, the both of you continuing to walk, Matt’s arm around your shoulder, yours around his waist.

a/n: i’m screaminggngnnggg😕😕😕 chris fluff coming soon😈

[myhockeyworld87]

Let’s Play Pretend - Matthew Tkachuk - Part 6 (Finale)

Word Count: 15,888

Warnings: Language, Smut, NSFW

Notes: Ugh! Here it is the final installment of this series. It’s bittersweet for me. I’ve enjoyed writing this story so much and it seems like you guys have enjoyed reading it as well. I know it was a bit of a wait but you got an extra 5K words out of it...haha. With that, the last time we saw these two they’d done the deed, but hadn’t faced the aftermath of it all. So here we go! Hope I don’t disappoint you guys with this ending. 

As always I hope you guys enjoy this. If you do, hit me with some feedback. It’s always welcome. Happy Reading!!!

Let’s Play Pretend Masterlist

Matthew was still in a bit of a haze as he drove to the practice arena for his meeting with Treliving. This was nothing like how he saw his morning going. He wanted to lay in bed and just profess his love for you, tell you how he's had these feelings for you forever, and that he was tired of playing pretend and wanted to make your relationship a real one. In his head, you'd admit that you'd loved him just as much and that you couldn't think of anything better in life than being his fiancé for real. But as much as he wanted the scenario that kept playing in his head to happen, his heart wasn't as sure that would be how things would go. He'd never once imagined Johnny knocking on his door looking for him.

That reminded him he needed to call his family. He punched the button on the car phone. "So you're alive," his dad answered.

"Ha, ha," Matthew sarcastically laughed back. "You knew I was fine."

"Did we? I mean you went radio silent after that text I sent you. I know it had to be a lot, finding out Brady got the captaincy and then the trade rumor. I hope you didn't take anything out on (Y/N)." Oh, he'd taken a few things out on her but not in the way his dad thought. "That girl has done everything for you, you know…"

"I know dad," Matthew cut off his father before he could reprimand him further. "She's the best thing that ever happened to me."

"Well, I'm glad you can finally see that."

"I can, dad. I think I've always known it deep down, but this…this whole situation has brought everything to life." Matthew paused wondering if he should tell his dad everything. Keith had always been his biggest supporter, next to his mom and he knew after his talk with him a few days ago, that his dad knew his true feelings. "I love her dad. Like love her, love her, and I can't see my life without her."

"So why haven't you told her that?" His father prompted.

"I planned on doing it this morning but I got derailed with a meeting with Treliving." Matthew sighed not happy with the situation but there was nothing that could be done. "As soon as I get back home, I plan on sitting down with (Y/N) and putting it all out there."

"I think that's a step in the right direction, Matthew, for both of you. Just be honest with her and follow your heart."

"Thanks, dad. I plan on it." Matthew meant exactly that. He was going to put everything out there and hope to god that you felt the same way as he did. "Well, I'm at the arena. I'll call ya tomorrow and let you know how everything went."

"Good luck, just know that your mom and I are rooting for you."

Matt hung up the phone and headed into the rink. He took a deep breath ready for whatever Treliving was going to tell him. At this point, he knew that the Eichel thing was nothing but a rumor, but that didn't mean that the team wasn't still trying to be rid of him. Just because this trade didn't work out, didn't mean that another wasn't in the works. All Matthew knew was that whatever was said in this meeting today, he would be able to handle it, because he had you.

He lifted his hand and knocked on the door, only walking in when he heard Treliving call out for him to enter. "Matthew, so glad you could make it in this morning." Matt sat down across from the GM, crossing his ankle over his knee to keep from bouncing his legs up and down. "I wanted to have a conversation with you and address what happened last evening."

"Ok."

Treliving steepled his fingers together, resting his elbows on the desk before he continued. "So...we were approached by Buffalo about trade with Eichel." Matt's heart sank more than he thought it would. It hurt knowing that his team, the one that he considered family, wanted to trade him. In the back of his mind, he kept hearing your voice, telling him that the two of you could make the best of any situation. And he knew he could, as long as you were by his side. "You should know, we never truly entertained the idea at all."

"Wait, what?"

"Matthew, you're a valuable part of this team, and despite what happened in preseason, we feel that you're the future of the Flames." Matthew breathed out a sigh of relief at Treliving's words. "Coach Sutter and I talked and we both feel there's no reason to wait. We'd like to offer you the captaincy now."

"Oh, wow." Matthew didn't know what to say. The entire summer this was the moment he'd been waiting for. He'd wanted it so much that he'd conned you into being his fake fiancé, but now that the moment was here, he was having mixed feelings. He was both shocked and surprised at himself at what came out of his mouth. "While I'm truly honored, like more than you'll ever know. I'm not sure that's what's best for the team right now." Treliving seemed taken back. "We've really been gelling as a team and I can see so much potential in this group to go all the way. I'm not saying that it has anything to do with us not having a captain at the moment or not, but I think disrupting this environment right now, wouldn't be what's best. I don't want you to get the wrong impression; I do want to be captain of this team. More than anything. Well, maybe not more than anything. But for it to be right, I think we need to wait until the end of the season."

Treliving was quiet. The silence almost beginning to make Matt regret what he said. Maybe he should've accepted it right now, especially after everything that he'd put you through. Matthew was pretty sure that when he told you he'd declined the captaincy, you weren't going to be happy with him, but he would cross that bridge after he told you he loved you. Right now, he had to deal with his GM. "I'm honestly surprised at you, Chucky." The GM using his nickname could be both good and bad. "You've really matured since last season, not only on the ice but in life as well it seems. You putting the team first really tells me, that when next season rolls around, there won't be any hesitation in naming you captain."

"Thank you," Matthew answered. "I appreciate your faith in me and while there's still a lot of work to be done this season; I look forward to being the Flames' new captain next year."

"I'll be proud to name you it as well. You've really stepped up these last few months, taking in your teammates, and being a leader both on and off the ice. Not to mention you getting into fewer fights. I can't help but wonder if all this has to do with your fiancé or something else."

Matthew smiled easily at the mention of you. "I'd like to take a lot of the credit but I think we both know it's been (Y/N). It's cheesy to say this, but she just makes me want to be a better person, you know?"

"I do know." Treliving agreed, rising from his seat, signaling that the meeting was over. Matthew rose as well, shaking the GM's hand. "I'm still going to look for that leadership from you, you know? Even without the C on your chest."

"It'll be there, sir. There's no need to worry about that."

"You know, a year ago I'm not sure I would've believed you, but today…today I have no doubt you'll keep your word." The GM smiled fondly at Matt, as he made his way out the door. "Give (Y/N) my best."

"I will. I'll see you tonight at the game." Matthew left the office feeling much better than when he walked in, at least as far as his career was concerned. His heart was a whole other matter. Morning skate was in an hour, so he text you saying he'd be staying at the arena until after practice. He didn't want to drive home only to have fifteen minutes to tell you that he loves you and then have to walk back out the door. You deserved so much better than that.

Once Matthew left, you looked around the house and knew you had to do something. Your bra hanging off the banister was not a look that would make it into architectural digest. Then there were the dirty dishes from last night's meal that were still on the table. You were pretty sure you weren't going to be able to get the layer of crust off them and would probably have to run them through the dishwasher twice to get them clean. It was definitely a mess you didn't want to leave for the housekeeper.

It took you close to an hour to clean up the downstairs before you followed the trail of clothes to the bedroom. The sheets were a rumpled mess, which only sent memories of last night flooding back. The way Matthew touched you, made you feel, and the look in his eyes, made you hot and bothered all over again. Last night had been everything you dreamed of and so much more. You'd fantasized about being with him so many times, but the reality was so much better than anything you'd conjured up in your head. Matthew had been both rough and gentle at the same time, everything that you'd ever wanted in a lover, and god if you didn't want to experience that all over again.

"UGH," you screamed out to the empty void of the room. If you let your mind keep wandering back to last night, you'd be in serious trouble. You grabbed the duvet and ripped it off the bed, then pulled the pillows out of their cases. As you rolled them up, the smell of sex wafted through the air, crumpling your resolve to put the night out of your mind just like you were the sheets.

You strode through the house, trying to imagine how your talk with Matthew was going to go. Matthew felt something for you, you knew that. What it was, you weren't sure. There was a chance, all be it slim, that he loved you, just as much as you loved him. The way he'd kissed you this morning before rushing up the stairs hinted at that, or so you thought. Then again it could've just been lust. When you'd been so rudely interrupted from the cozy haven you and Matt had created this morning, you'd been keenly aware of his hard-on pressing into your body. You were easily ready for round two and you were definitely sure, so was Matthew, which scared you. He could easily walk through the door and say that all he wanted was a simple friend with benefits relationship with you just like he'd suggested a few weeks ago. That option seemed very real in your mind and shook you to the core. Could you do that? You weren't sure if it was even possible to keep your feelings out of the bedroom, as it took everything in your power to not tell Matthew that you loved him last night. To go back to kisses and touches that meant nothing, seemed almost impossible, let alone to have him deep inside you.

In the fifty minutes it took for the wash cycle, you contemplated how you were going to tell Matt that there was no way that being friends with benefits would work. However, during the next hour of the dryer, you talked yourself into it, for not being able to touch Matthew and love him would kill you more. By the time you headed back upstairs to make the bed, you convinced yourself that Matt would walk in, declare the two of you fuck buddies, so to speak, and you were going to be fine with that. You'd just finished pulling up the duvet when you heard him call out your name. "(Y/N)," he yelled as he entered the door, not giving you time to answer before calling out. "Princess, where are you?"

"Upstairs," you called back, taking a giant gulp of air before having to face the man you loved. Matt walked through the threshold of the bedroom, all damp locks from the shower he'd taken before leaving the arena, and you wanted nothing more than to run your fingers through the unruly curls. You tossed on one of the throw pillows before asking, "How did things go with Treliving?"

"Good, I guess." Matt fidgeted from side to side, as the nerves started to bubble up inside him. The whole ride home he practiced verbatim what he wanted to say to you the moment he walked through the door, but seeing you in the bedroom, next to the bed where he'd made love to you several hours ago, had all those thoughts flying out the window. "I don't think you're going to be happy with me." Matt watched your face as your brows knitted together in concern. "We can talk about it later though." He took a deep breath in, ready for his well-rehearsed speech. "I really think we need to talk about us."

Matt's words stilled your actions. You expected him to tell you what had happened between him and the GM but apparently, he wanted to get right to things between the two of you. "Ok, you were right."

Your words threw Matthew off. "Were?"

"The whole friends with benefits thing. You were absolutely right about it." Matt was stunned, it was written all over his face, but whether that was because you actually agreed with him or that he no longer wanted to be with you that way; you didn't know. You didn't give him time to answer. "It's been so long for both of us and…"

Matt didn't hear anything else you said, as this piercing ringing started in his ears. He couldn't believe you were saying that you just wanted to be fuck buddies with him. Did last night mean nothing to you? It had meant everything to him and he couldn't go back from being so intimate and loving you, to being indifferent. "Stop," he finally shouted more harshly than he intended. His fingers immediately went to his curls, sifting and tugging on the locks as if he could make his brain work and figure out what to say. None of this was going how he intended. "Jesus, (Y/N)," he finally breathed out. "I don't want to be your damn friend with benefits."

Your heart stopped beating. Hearing Matthew say the words out loud, made bile rise to the back of your throat. It was your greatest fear, not being enough for him, and now you wanted to run into the ensuite and empty the contents of your stomach. Instead, you stood there, trying to stop your body from violently shaking as he continued to speak.

"I love you," Matt blurted out. Nothing like the way he actually wanted to tell you. "And maybe you don't feel the same way, but damnit I'm tired of pretending I don't."

He loved you.

Matthew Tkachuk loved you.

You were stunned into silence. Partly because you never expected him to be. If you were being honest, you never let yourself imagine he would love you the same as you did him, for fear of getting your heart broken, but now he did, and your heart felt like bursting at the seams.

Matthew waited a full minute for you to say something, but when you didn't his heart started to sink. There was no going back now. He didn't want to take those three little words back anyhow now that they were out; so, he kept going. "I think I've always loved you, (Y/N)." He wanted to pace back and forth in the room but stood still as he continued. Hands still sifting through his curls as he did. "God, when I think back on it, I think I knew back in middle school. I was so damn jealous that Kyle got to kiss you in that play. You remember, what was it called?"

"Snow White," you supplied finally breaking your silence.

Matthew smiled, as he remembered you both as kids. "Yeah, I always wanted to just call it the dwarfs." He chuckled to himself, remembering you all in costumes. "But then the night of the play Kyle got sick and the teacher told me to fill in."

"I remember." And you did, you'd been thrilled and nervous to have Matthew play Prince Charming.

"All my friends were chirping me because we had to kiss and I made a big fuss saying I didn't want to, even though secretly I did." He looked at you as heat flooded his cheeks. "I'd never kissed anyone before and I wanted it to be you, but I didn't know how to handle my friends picking on me. And even though Mrs. Carson told me to that it was just pretending; I knew it was more. The moment my lips touched yours, I knew everything changed between us. I just didn't know how much." Matt chuckled and you joined him as you thought of what happened next. "But then Brady shoved Leo into the bed you were lying on…"

"Sending me flat on my ass."

"And the whole set crashing down." You were both full-on laughing now. "God, we were horrible actors. I guess we've changed a bit as we've gotten older." The thought sobered you both, as it reminded you of your fake engagement. "I think I pushed all those feelings that I had for you, to the back after that. Well, except when Brady told me he loved you." Matt thought back to that moment. "I'd never wanted to throttle my brother so badly. I hated him. He's my brother and I hated him at that moment." Matthew's eyes filled with tears at the memory. "Partly, because he loved you, but mostly because he had the guts to admit his feelings for you, and I didn't." He blew out a frustrated breath. "Fuck, I'm a horrible person."

You reached out and touched his arm, a natural instinct to just comfort him. "No, you're not."

"Maybe not. I was an awful brother at that moment, that's for sure. I'd like to think I've changed since then."

"You have," you reassured him, your hand sliding down to his. His fingers automatically entwined with yours.

"I wish I would've recognized those feelings back then and told you I loved you, instead I lied to you, to Brady, and to myself." Matt looked down at your linked fingers. He wanted so badly to never let you go, to think that he could hold your hand like this forever, but while you'd said a few words since he told you his feelings; you hadn't said a word about how you felt for him. "Maybe if I hadn't, things would be different." He let go of your hand then, all be it reluctantly. "Fuck, (Y/N), the moment you kissed me in this house, everything changed. I couldn't lie to myself about my feelings for you any longer. Every day, while you've been pretending to be my fiancé, is just one day more, I fall deeper in love with you. I know last night was just some meaningless sex to you, but to me…it was so much more."

It was so much more to you as well, and you wanted to tell him that, but Matt didn't give you a chance. "I can't pretend anymore, (Y/N), and I get it, if you don't love me back. I just…well I can't be your fuck toy…when I have all these feelings for you."

"Matty…" you tried to interrupt.

"And I don't know what all this means…" He motioned between the two of you. "For the two of us…like I know we said that we'd stick this out until the end of the season…but I just don't know if I can keep pretending…"

"Matthew!" There was a bit more authority in your voice this time, hoping that it would somehow break through the endless stream of words he kept spewing.  

However, it didn't. "I mean I want us to always be friends…I just don't know if I can do all of this…"

You opted for a different tactic this time. "I LOVE YOU!" you shouted at him. It certainly wasn't how you pictured telling him over the years but at least it stunned him into silence.

"You what?"

"I love you." This time you said it a bit softer, letting words carry more weight. "I've loved you for years, Matty. Like…so many years. But I was just so afraid of losing you, I didn't want to tell you."

"You love me?" He asked and you were pretty sure that he both heard and comprehended what you said even if making you say it one more time.

"Yes, you idiot. I love you." The corners of his mouth picked up in the widest grin and then before you knew what happened, his lips were on yours. It wasn't hard or crushing as when he'd first kissed you last night. This time Matthew was tender, almost reverent in the way his lips glided with yours. His arms slipped around your waist drawing you closer to him, as yours snaked around his neck. Somewhere in a haze, you realized that you were kissing the love of your life and that he loved you in return. You'd dreamt of this so many times but it was nothing compared to the reality. You couldn't breathe and it had nothing to do with one kiss melting into another, but the realization that Matthew loved you. He loved you, just as much as you loved him.

His hands stole down to your ass, where he grasped the globes, lifting you so that you had no choice but to wrap your legs around him. Just like last night, he danced you both over to the bed, only this time he sat, leaving you to straddle him. Only then did he break the kiss. "Say it again?" He asked as his hands roamed all over your body. Knitting your brows together, you pretended as if you didn't quite understand what he was asking. "Don't tease," he huffed.

"I vaguely remember saying something about…you being an idiot."

His fingers deftly moved to your sides where he tickled you mercilessly. The sound of your laughter echoing off the walls. "Say it…Say it or I won't stop."

"Stop," you gasped out, as laughter continued to bubble forth from you. When he didn't relent, you finally heaved, "Iloveyou." It was all one word as you didn't have a full breath in your body. His fingers stopped then, giving you a chance to catch your breath. There was a seriousness in Matt's eyes, one you knew that while he may love this playful side of you, he needed to hear the words spoken with a more sincere note, and you would never deny him that. "I love you, Matthew. I've loved you…" you shook your head. "I think I've loved you my whole life."

He pecked your lips before saying, "God, I've waited forever to hear you say that. I love you so much, (Y/N)."

"Not as much as I love you."

"Oh, princess, we are not playing this game, because you will lose." To think that Matthew loved you even half as much as you did him was still beyond your comprehension. It was overwhelming but in the best way. "But seriously, (Y/N), we should talk for a minute." You blinked hard at Matthew's offhanded comment. It felt like he was taking the wind right out of your sails and leaving you stranded out in open water.

"Ok," you mumbled out weakly.

Matthew saw the wary look in your eye. "It's not bad. It's just…I don't know how to put this…"

The longer Matt took to spit this out the more worried you became.

"I'm saying this all wrong." The last thing Matt wanted to do was make you question everything that had transpired over the last several minutes. "I love you, (Y/N) and what I'm trying to say is. I should've never made you lie to everyone about us." Matthew knew he still wasn't saying what he wanted to. "What I'm trying to say is that I'll tell everyone the truth…tell them that we're not engaged…though I hope you know that's what I want…to really be engaged to you…hell…I want to marry you…but…"

"Matty, stop." You took both your hands and placed them on his cheeks. "I want all that too. I want to be engaged and married and…well…" You didn't want to scare him with talk of kids, so you just continued. "But I can't see telling everyone that we lied now that we're finally together." As soon as those final four words left your mouth, you wanted to take them back. "I mean I don't know if we are together, it's just..well…"

"Oh, we're together." Matthew wanted to make sure there wasn't a doubt in your mind about that. "There's no way that I'm letting you go, not now, not ever."

Well, that definitely brought a smile to your face. "Then I can't see changing things now, as I don't plan on giving you up either. Besides, I'm still on shaky ground with the publishing company after the whole Mason fiasco…"

"Please never mention that man's name again."

Matthew's grip had tightened on your ass until it was almost biting. You leaned in and pecked his lips. "Deal." His fingers eased a bit. "Anyhow, I really don't want all my readers finding out that I lied about being engaged to you."

Matt tipped his head back and closed his eyes as frustration with himself set back in. "I'm so sorry, princess, for not taking your life into consideration when I asked you to do this."

"Hey," you cupped his cheek when he didn't immediately look at you. "Hey look at me. That's in the past, and we are moving towards the future. So, no more apologizing. Got me?"

"Got you," he answered with a smile. "Have I told you how much I love you?"

"Hmmm," you pretended to contemplate it. "Not in the last three minutes."

"I guess I need to rectify that." Matthew flipped you over on your back before you could even think about what he just said. "In fact, I think I should show you how much I do." His body loomed over yours, making your heart beat faster. Your arms looped around his neck as his lips came down on yours. His hips gently rocked into your clothed core telling you exactly what he had planned.

"Whoa," you told him gently backing away from the kiss. Matt gazed down at you curious as to why you put the brakes on something he knew you both wanted. "You have a game tonight."

"Yeah, so?"

"Well, shouldn't you be napping?"

"I plan on it. Right after I make love to you."

You giggled, one of those silly schoolgirl ones, at the mention of making love. Even though it was something you'd dreamed of since high school. "What is so funny? I swear I tell you I love you and you've done nothing but laugh since."

Matt seemed only mildly miffed, and you assumed that was more because you were distracting him from his true purpose, which was getting you out of your clothes. "It's just…I never thought this would all happen…yet here we are talking about…" You made a goofy face before saying, "making love. It reminds me of when we were twelve and had just got 'the talk'."

"When I was twelve, I had no idea what I was talking about let alone how to do any of it." Matthew ground his hips into you then, making you gasp. "I've definitely learned a thing or two since then."

"Oh yeah?"

"Mmm, most definitely. Now I'd love to show my girlfriend a thing or two I've learned. If she would quit giggling. It's deflating my ego."

You knew Matt was only half kidding, but still, you sobered. Hands trailing down his chest to the hem of his shirt, you bunched up the fabric to lift it over his head. "Then by all means show me." You rid him of the garment in mere seconds, then Matthew's lips found yours once again. His tongue exploring you as though he'd never kissed you before; searching and reaching into your soul so that you had no choice but to give him your whole heart in just that kiss alone. You were lost in him, as your hands roamed up and down his bare chest, but you wanted more. It was that thought that spurred you on, as you shimmied his sweats down over his hips. You could only get them as far as his knees, to go further would mean your lips would have to leave his, and you weren't ready for that.

Matthew felt the same urgency that you did. His hands slid under your shirt where he was relieved to find you not wearing a bra. It gave direct access to your breasts. His hands were on them in seconds, tweaking and kneading them, until your nipples were turret little peaks. When he couldn't stand it any longer, he broke the kiss to peel off your top and throw it across the room. Only then did he let his mouth travel down your neck and over your collarbone to your soft and supple breasts. God how he loved them. Over the years, you teased him so many times walking around in a flimsy piece of material you called a bikini.  He'd nearly come undone seeing you each summer, just wondering what it would be like to see what was underneath it. Now, it was all his. You were his. And Matthew planned on keeping it that way for the rest of your lives.

His mouth found your nipple, where he suckled it to a rock-hard pebble that had you moaning out his name. All the while his hands moved south, seeking out your core. A place he knew where heaven existed as he'd been there last night. He stripped your leggings off first. Once they were gone, his mouth traveled down over your stomach, dropping loving kisses as he went. He finally stopped when he reached the thin scrap of material that covered what he wanted. Looking up, he captured your gaze. Saw the heat and desire that you had for him there. He gently nipped the fabric dragging it down between his teeth to uncover you, while his fingers hooked around the elastic sides. He releases the lace from his teeth and in one swift motion tore the panties from your body.

You gasped as cool air hit your pussy, but then Matthew's mouth was back. Hands gently nudging your legs further apart to accommodate him. He rained kisses along your inner thigh. By the time he reached the juncture of your legs, you were trembling with need. He blew out a warm breath, making you shiver before two fingers spread you wide. Flattening his tongue, he licked a long stripe between your folds. "Oh God, Matty," you panted out while Matthew smiled against your core.

"So, fucking sweet," Matt groaned out, for he had been dreaming of this moment for so long. Last night had been so heated and rushed that he hadn't taken the time to worship your body like he truly wanted. He planned on making up for that now. He dove back into your pussy, tongue lapping at you, tasting your essence.

Your hands fisted into the duvet as Matthew's tongue worked his magic on you. It was too much when he flicked it back and forth over your clit. Hips bucking upward into his mouth, he had no choice but to sling an arm across you to keep you from squirming. His onslaught didn't stop as he sucked hard on the little nub and you moaned out with pleasure. Your right hand sifted through his curls, partly holding him there to continue and part almost pushing him away. Matt reveled in it all. Your soft moans spurred him on until he had no choice but to sink two fingers deep inside you.

"Matty, please," you begged writhing underneath him.

He didn't relent though. Fingers still thrusting in and out of you, while he worked your swollen clit. You could feel that familiar tingle start in your belly. That little flutter that told you your orgasm was working its way through your body. Then Matthew hit that spot, that sent you spiraling out of control. You swore you saw stars as your orgasm hit, and you tugged on his hair bringing him a bit closer to your core.

Matthew worked you through your orgasm, continuing to suck on your clit, as a rush of wetness soaked his fingers. He felt like a fucking god, making you cum so hard. It was a rush and he wanted to do it again and again. Glancing up at you, he saw pure ecstasy written all over your face. He couldn't stop himself as he lapped at your clit again.

"Matty," you whined out. "It's too much." You were way too sensitive to go again at the moment. Besides you wanted to return the favor.

Matthew arched his eyebrow at you. He knew you could take more, but didn't want to push you, as he wanted to sink his cock deep inside you and make you cum again. He slithered his way up your body until your hand caressed his cheek bringing his lips to yours. He melted into the kiss, drinking you in. It was then you took the opportunity to turn the tables on him; flipping him on his back.

It didn't take you long to shuck Matthew's sweats and briefs off him. Last night, you hadn't got the chance to really appreciate him like you wanted to. He was rock hard now. The length of him straining up to his abs. You licked your lips and heard Matthew groan in anticipation. Raking your nails on the inside of his thighs, you let your tongue slip out to lick the precum off the tip. "Fuck," Matt hissed out, letting his hands tangle in your locks. Your lips sunk over engulfing the tip, then slipped down more to take almost every inch of him. What you couldn't fit, you fisted your hand around and started to pump. You hollowed out your cheeks and bobbed your head, as you took his cock in and out of your mouth.

"Your mouth is magical, princess," Matthew moaned out. His fingers gathered your hair so he could watch you work; a sight that almost sent him over the edge. He felt his cock hit the back of your throat and his eyes rolled back in his head. You were going to kill him but in the best possible way. When you cupped his balls, he knew he was done for, and he pulled you off of him before he exploded in your mouth. You looked up at Matt under hooded lashes, questioning why he'd stopped you. "Princess, I need to be inside you now."

His comment made you chucked and you relished the power you had over him at that moment. Slinking your way back up, you straddled Matthew. His cock just a hairsbreadth from your cunt. "I wanna ride you, Matty."

The corner of Matt's lips picked up in a smirk. "By all means Princess. Have at it."

You pumped his cock, before positioning it at your entrance, then started to sink down. His girth stretched you, making you feel so full, and you closed your eyes enjoying every second of it. "Look at me, Princess." Your eyes snapped open at Matthew's command, connecting with his instantly. There was awe and that sense of wonder there, but so much love it made your heart want to burst. You could only hope that yours reflected the same, as you bottomed out on him.

Leaning down, you kissed him so passionately there could be no doubt that you loved him; that you wanted to spend the rest of your life with him and him alone. His hand went to your hip, urging you to move. You started to rock against him; his cock slipping in and out of you with ease from how wet you were. Breaking the kiss, you sat back up, resting your hands on his chest so you could ride him easily. His hands skated up your abs to cup your breasts where he tweaked and pinched your nipples. The action encouraging you to ride him faster. "You're so fucking beautiful," Matt breathed out. Swiveling your hips, he gasped as you sent him hurtling towards the edge. You knew he was close, had been since your lips were on his cock. He wouldn't last much longer, and that was fine with you, but knowing Matt he'd hold off until you were hanging off that precipice as well. You deftly moved your fingers to your clit, which was still sensitive from your previous orgasm, and rubbed small circles there. "So, fucking hot," he panted. His words combined with just that small touch pushed you over the cliff and you came hard.

"Fuck," Matt screamed as your pussy clenched around his cock. He grabbed your hips, thrusting wildly into them until his own orgasm overtook him. Hot spurts of cum filled you and you loved every second of it. When you finally came down from your high, you collapsed onto Matt. Both of you breathing heavily from your lovemaking. "I love you," Matthew finally whispered as his hand ran up and down your spine.

Leaning up on your elbows, you looked directly into his eyes. "I love you too." He pecked your lips before his head fell back against the mattress. You could tell he was exhausted, and in a few hours, he needed to be at the arena ready to play. In an attempt to let him rest, you made a move to roll off him.

"Where are you going?"

"You have a game, in a few hours and need to sleep." His arms locked around your back pinning you to him so that you couldn't move.

"I can sleep just like this." Matt had no intention of letting you go.

"Matty," you protested.

"Fine." He rolled you both onto your side. "Better?" You hummed in acquiesce for you knew he wasn't going to relinquish you further.

"You never did tell me what happened with Treliving?"

Matthew huffed. Of course, you wouldn't forget about the meeting he had earlier with the GM. "I thought you wanted me to sleep." You simply raised an eyebrow at him. "Fine," he sighed as his cock finally slipped out of you. He felt the loss as much as you did. It was almost as if he was distancing himself from you in preparation for what he had to tell you next. "It went pretty well. Apparently, Buffalo did make that offer." Your eyes widen at that statement, so he quickly rushed to the next part. "Though they never entertained it at all."

"Well, that's good news, Matty."

"It is. It's this next part I know you're not going to like." Matt took a breath steeling himself for what he was about to say. "They offered me the captaincy."

You jumped up on your elbow, so excited for Matt. "Oh my god, that's amazing. It's…"

"I turned it down."

"What?"

Matthew inwardly cringed. He'd put you through utter hell, made you lie to your family and friends, and all for what? So that he could turn down what he so badly wanted. It was a dick move and he knew it. He sat up in bed then, the sheet dropping down to his waist. "I turned it down, (Y/N)."

"But I don't understand. Isn't this what you always wanted?" You scooted up to rest against the headboard with him, only bringing the sheet with you to cover you. It acted almost as a shield for anything more he might say.

"It is…or it was." Matt shook himself. "I still want it, don't get me wrong. It's just…like I told Treliving…the team is in a good place right now and I think we need to put them first. I don't want to disrupt the chemistry we've got going on right now. And I know this was like one of the main reasons I asked you to fake this whole engagement with me…but I guess things changed. That's not right. You've changed me." Matthew shook his head in disbelief at the whole situation. "When that video came out, I thought my world ended, but you told me things would be alright and they were…but only because of you. You've always put me first (Y/N) and it's time I started doing that as well. I hope you don't hate me for this." Matthew was breathing heavily after his little speech. He'd literally just told you that he loved then made love to you and the last thing he wanted was for you to tell him that you hated him for putting you through all this hell for nothing.

You were quiet letting everything that Matt said sink in. Had this happened a few months ago, you would've been fuming, but everything was different now. "I'm proud of you," you told him with a smile on your face, before leaning over and pecking his lips.

Matt was stunned, to put it mildly. He'd expected you to yell or scream at the very least, not a sweet kiss to the lips with even sweeter words. "Really?"

"Yes, really." A small chuckle escaped your lips at his expression of disbelief. "It takes a lot to put everyone else's needs above what you really want."

"Well, I haven't really done that where we've been concerned, but I promise I'm going to." Matthew took a deep breath, he'd thought about this next part a lot ever since last night. "I acted like a spoiled brat last night when I heard about that trade rumor." You went to stop him but he held up a hand to keep your words at bay. "I mean I can't regret it too much considering how everything ended up, but I should've handled it better. I wasn't thinking about us." You cocked your head to the side not understanding his meaning. "You were right. Buffalo could've been good for both of us. It's a lot asking you to travel to New York all the time for work and I never thought about that…not last night or this summer. But I'm thinking about it now. I can ask for a trade either now, or when my contract's up, whatever you want. I can try and stipulate that it's in the Metro though Carolina would have to be out, but every other city would work. If I'm lucky it would be in NYC but Philly or…"

"Matthew stop!" You'd try to catch his attention when he'd first said the word trade, but when started naming cities you couldn't take it any longer. "I don't want to move." Because really you didn't. "I mean I would, if we had to, but Calgary is home. This place," you gestured to the bedroom. "Is home."

"No, (Y/N). It's not." You looked over at him, eyes wide and brimming with tears because in these two short months it had felt like this new chapter had begun. One that solely was about the two of you and the start of your life together, even if it had been pretend most of the time. "Home is anywhere you are."

"Oh, Matty." This time you couldn't keep the tears from flowing, but you quickly swiped them away, as he gathered you in his arms.

"I love you, (Y/N)."

"I love you too, but I don't want to move to New York."

"But that's all you talked about earlier this summer."

"I only wanted to go there because I couldn't be with you." Matthew gazed down at you in disbelief. "I thought you were moving on with your life. That you'd find some girl to move into your new fancy home and end up getting married. And I couldn't just stay in St. Louis and watch it all happen."

"Funny," Matthew lightly chuckled. "I did find a girl for all that and she's right here with me." His lips found yours once again, it was as if the floodgates that had been holding back all the emotions you both had for each other had finally been unlocked and now you couldn't seem to stop kissing and touching each other. "And in case you didn't get the memo, I'm not letting you go."

"Good, because I don't plan on leaving. So, no asking for a trade."

"I'll agree to that, as long as if there ever comes a time that you feel we should move; you tell me."

"Promise," you answered. "Now, time for a nap. You've got a big game tonight, and I've got dinner with the girls."

Matthew picked at the sheet which covered your breasts. "I was thinking more about round two."

You lightly shoved him away. "Bring home a win and I'll think about it."

"Think about it?" He pulled back the sheet, while at the same time hauled his body over top of yours. "Still wanna think about it?"

"Matty," you giggled but then let out a moan when his lips connected with the hollow of your neck. Hands gliding up to his shoulders, you went to push him away only they slid around clutching him and drawing him nearer. "Nap." The mumbled word was said in hopes to remind you both that he should be resting for the game.

"I'm good, princess. I feel like I could score a million goals at the moment." How could you argue with him when everything he was doing was setting your body on fire. Giving in was a whole lot easier and something you both wanted.

It was at least an hour later before you were both sleeping. But true to his word Matt scored a goal and had three assists against the Rangers. He tried to convince you that it should be your new pregame ritual, but you weren't having any part in his superstitions.

It would've been a lie to say that it didn't happen again over the next couple of months, as your new relationship progressed. Life with Matthew was absolutely blissful. The two of you were inseparable. Well unless he was on a road trip. You'd dreamed for years of a life with Matthew and now that you had it; it was everything that you thought it would be and so much more.

"You're really good with him," Sarah commented offhandedly.

"Nah, he's just a good boy. Aren't you Benny?" You asked the baby as you swayed him back and forth on your hip while making silly noises at him. Benny giggled and laughed like he always did.

"He has his moments, let me tell you." The two of you were waiting for Matthew and Erik to leave the arena and head home for the night. The Flames had one more away game before the All-Star break. Unfortunately, Matthew hadn't been selected to attend this year, but Brady had. With the last game being in St. Louis, you were flying with the team to spend a few days at home before the entire family headed out to Las Vegas to watch Brady. "Have you and Chucky talked about having one anytime soon?" Sarah's question not only shook you out of your thoughts but caught you off guard.

"No, not yet. We still haven't come up with a date for the wedding." Although Matthew kept insisting he'd marry you tomorrow if you'd let him. The whole thing still felt like somewhat of a dream to you. You no longer felt uncomfortable wearing his grandmother's ring, as you knew that one day, you and Matt would be man and wife. When that day would be, you weren't entirely sure. For now, you were just basking in the glow of each other's love.

"Well, I'd start thinking about it," Sarah said reaching over to take Benny from your arms. "Because the look on his face tells me he's taking you home to try and get one tonight." Matthew did have a stupid grin on his face as he stood in the locker room doorway gazing at you with Benny. "Have fun tonight, you two." Sarah winked as she walked off with Benny and Erik.

Matthew came up, grabbed your waist, and then kissed you soundly, before saying, "You know you looked pretty good holding Benny Bear a few minutes ago."

"Oh no, we're not ready for that yet Tkachuk."

He twirled you to the side, then picked up his bag and the two of you headed out. "Soon though, don't ya think?"

You waited until you were in the car before you answered. "We just started really dating a couple months ago. You can't seriously be thinking about babies."

"Why not? And it's been more than a couple months. We've been engaged since what…June?"

"Fake engaged since then," you corrected him.

"Was it though?" He shrugged nonchalantly as he started the car, putting it in drive and pulling away. "I like to think of it as sort of our pre-engagement."

You'd watched the game pretty closely tonight, though there were a few times that Benny stole your attention, but you hadn't seen him hit his head or anything. "That's not even a thing."

He arched an eyebrow at you. "It can be our thing." A simple eye roll was your answer. Leave it to Matthew to make his own rules. "I'm just saying…we're going to make beautiful babies."

The flutter that went through your belly at Matthew's words shouldn't be as thrilling as it was. You could picture it now, Matty holding your little baby making silly faces and cooing noises; it sent your ovaries into overdrive. "Fine. You're not wrong."

"Does that mean…"

"No! It does not. We are going home and packing. We leave for St. Louis in the morning and neither one of us is packed." He'd been keeping you busy in the bedroom in other ways than getting stuff ready for the trip. "Besides, I think everyone would appreciate it if we got married first before we started popping out kids."

"Pfft…You know both our parents would be ecstatic if we told them they were going to be grandparents." Ugh, he was so right. You could already see them in the baby aisle at Target buying one of everything. Thankfully, you were saved from answering as you pulled into the driveway, and while you did give in to your desire for Matthew; it was only after you had packed for St. Louis and Vegas.

Matthew had arranged for you to fly with the team, though your parents were going to pick you up at the airport. Racing around in the morning, you jumped in the shower before Matthew, hoping to give yourself some extra time to pack all your toiletries. You'd just finished dressing when you went to put back on your engagement ring that you slipped off before your shower, only it wasn't there. Bending down, you checked the floor of the bathroom yet still didn't find it. You always placed it in the ring holder you had on the bathroom counter, but it wasn't there. Running into the bedroom, you checked your nightstand but again it was empty. The toiletry bag was next, for it must have slipped in there when you were packing everything up. Again, you came up empty.

You were on your hands and knees when Matthew walked into the bedroom from his shower. "What are you doing?"

Halfway under the bed, phone flashlight on, you found all kinds of things, including several condom wrappers that Matthew hadn't thrown away in the last couple of weeks, but not your engagement ring. "I'm looking for something." You weren't ready to admit that you couldn't find the one thing that would literally crush Matthew.

You could hear him pad across the floor, then suddenly his head was under the bed on the other side. "Looking for something?" You banged your head as he startled you. Matthew for his part looked a tad guilty that he'd inadvertently hurt you. You crawled out from under the bed, hand rubbing where you'd hit, as tears started to rain down your face. Matt was over by you before you could wipe them away. "Princess, are you hurt? I didn't mean…"

"It's not my head…" you hiccupped as a sob attempted to escape. "I lost…I lost…" It felt as if you said the words it would be real and you didn't want that at all, but still, he deserved the truth. "Oh, Matty…I lost the ring." There was a slight look of confusion on his face, telling you he didn't quite understand. "Your grandmother's ring. I can't find it."

"What do you mean you can't find it?"

God, you loved him, but sometimes you just wanted to shake him. "I took it off to shower like I always do. I swore I put on the little dish I have, but it's not there. I've looked everywhere."

"I'm sure it's around here somewhere. Let me help you look." He went back into the bathroom and you followed him. Eyes searching with every step you took.

You tried to play it in your mind, if it had fallen on the floor, it could've easily rolled somewhere there. Dropping down to your knees, you crawled around looking for the diamond. It wasn't small by any means and should be easy to see. From the corner of your eye, you saw Matthew searching the sink top. It occurred to you then what might have happened. "What if it went down the drain?"

Matthew peered down the sink, moving his head this way and that. "Let me see the flashlight." You ran back to the bedroom and grabbed your phone, handing it off to Matt the minute you walked back in. Again, he stared down into the drain. "I don't see it, but that doesn't mean it's not down there."

"We need to call a plumber."

"Princess, there isn't time for that. We need to be at the airport…" he checked his watch. "Like now."

"I'm not going."

"What?"

"You heard me, Matty. I'm not going."

"You're being ridiculous, (Y/N)." He was already reaching for you, but you backed away getting ready to head into the bedroom. "We'll call a plumber as soon as we get back. The drain trap probably has it. It's not going to go anywhere."

"The what?"

"The drain trap." He opened the cabinet below the sink. "See how it bends?" You nodded. "There's a little trap in there for when things like this happen. I will call a plumber and have him here the day we get back. I'm sure that's where the ring is."

"This is why I didn't want your grandmother's ring, Matthew. I was afraid something like this would happen."

"Nothing's happened. It's probably stuck in the drain." Matt insisted and you could see him getting frustrated.

"And if it's not?"

"Then we turn a claim in to the insurance company. That's why it's insured."

"But Matty…it's your grandmother's ring. You can't replace that."

He sighed, partly annoyed yet still trying to play it off that it wasn't a big deal, even though you knew it was. "No, you can't," he agreed. "But it's just a ring, (Y/N). When I look at it, it's not like I see my grandmother. I only see our future."

"Oh Matty, that makes it so much worse." He rolled his eyes, the frustration clear now. "You go. I'll call the plumber, as soon as he finds the ring, I'll book a flight and head to St. Louis."

"This is completely ridiculous, (Y/N). You're getting on the team plane with me. It could take days to get a plumber here."

"I can't face your family, knowing I lost the ring."

He hauled you into his chest. "OUR family doesn't want to see the ring. They want to see you." His thumb and index finger lifted your chin as you were tucked into him. "You haven't seen your parents in months. We missed Christmas with our families. You're really going to take a couple days to get a ring that isn't going anywhere, and miss out on everything?"

When he put it like that it didn't make much sense. "No," you mumbled weakly.

"Then go grab your suitcase, and let's get out of here." He leaned down and pecked your lips before tapping your ass and sending you off to the bedroom.

Matthew had you both packed in the car before you could second guess yourself. He ushered you onto the plane, seating you beside himself for the flight. His arms wrapped around your shoulders and drew you close to his body as the plane took off. You felt sick to your stomach the longer you sat there. How on earth were you going to face Keith and Chantal? Especially after all that Keith had done for you with the Mason situation. While Keith hadn't been able to get Mason fired, he had brought Mason's action to the attention of those higher up. In the end, Mason had shot himself in the foot as others reported similar actions. He was fired from the publishing house, and last you heard was having trouble finding a job. While you hated to see anyone down on their luck, Mason had only gotten what he deserved.

It seemed like a slap in the face to Matthew's family that you'd lost a family heirloom. The thought made you half sick. So, when the fasten seatbelt sign came off, you quickly undid the belt. "I'll be back." You rushed out of the seat and headed back to the bathroom.

"Everything ok with (Y/N)?" Hanny asked Matt.

"She thinks her engagement ring fell down the sink this morning and we didn't have time to get it before we left." Noah's eyes widen but other than that he didn't say anything. "She's afraid to face my family since the ring was my gram's."

"Guess that explains why she looked like she was going to toss up her breakfast."

"She's worried over nothing. My parents aren't going to say a word."

"Yeah, Big Walt wouldn't have a mean bone in his body for (Y/N). Not to mention your mom thinks the world of her."

"Exactly." Matthew agreed with Hanny. "They're just happy that we're happy."

"Hey Chucky," Markstrom said startling his friend as his hand came down on his shoulder. "You might wanna check on (Y/N). I was back getting coffee and…well she doesn't sound ok back there."

Matthew was out of his seat in a flash and headed back to the lavatory. His initial thoughts were that you were back there crying and expected to hear you sobbing, instead, all he heard was you heaving the contents of your stomach into the disgustingly gross airplane toilet. He rapped on the door. "Princess, are you ok?" He heard you heave again before you muffled out a 'yeah.' Guilt got the best of him and he started rethinking his decision to basically force you to come. "Can you let me in?"

The lock to the door slid to open, and Matthew made his way into the small space, barely able to close the door behind him. "Babe, are you really making yourself sick over this?" You stood there catching your breath as he rubbed small circles on your back.

"I don't know…maybe."

"(Y/N), this is silly. It's just a material object." He continued to caress your skin, the action making you feel better, as you leaned back against him. "We'll get it as soon as we get home. I already called the plumber and I'm sure when they call back, we'll get everything set up."

He was right. The ring would still be stuck in the drain when you got back to Calgary. Taking another deep breath, you felt somewhat better but your stomach was still queasy. "I know you're right. I'm sorry."

"It's ok, princess. I just don't like seeing you work yourself up like this."

"I just can't believe I was so stupid and knocked it into the sink."

"Accidents happen. Do you feel like you can go back and sit down, or is your stomach still upset?"

"It settling a bit. I probably should've eaten something this morning." You'd totally skipped breakfast in your search for the ring and had a feeling that wasn't helping the uneasy fluttering going through you at the moment.

"Let's get you some toast and tea or something." Once you were back in your seat, Matthew brought you some toast and a hot cup of tea. Of course, Hanny and Markstrom gave you a sympathetic look as you went to sit back down, which didn't make your stomach feel any better. You'd be glad to get off the plane and get seeing both your and Matthew's parents over with. Hopefully, once they knew what had happened your stomach would go back to normal.

The plan was that your parents would pick you up at the airport and you would head over to Keith and Chantal's, while Matthew checked in to the hotel with the team. You planned on staying tonight with your parents but Matthew insisted that your other nights would be spent with him. He even went as far as to say that he'd get a hotel for the two of you to stay at if you weren't comfortable staying at his parents. Little did he know that while you agreed to stay at Keith and Chantal's, there would be no hanky panky going on in his childhood bedroom. The last thing you needed was to disrespect his parents more by having sex in their house.

How your parents didn't notice your missing ring within the first five minutes of seeing them, you had no idea, but you were able to make it all the way to the Tkachuk house without either of them saying a word. The minute you walked in the door, Chantal enveloped you in a hug and you felt your stomach churn again. You had to take a deep breath to not lose the toast you ate earlier. Keith came over the moment that Chantal let you go and you couldn't stop the dam of tears you'd held at bay.

"Hey kiddo, we're happy to see you too," Keith told you as he grabbed you in a hug, mistaking your tears for happy ones.

As soon as you got yourself under control, you pulled back from the hug. "It's not that…though I do miss you all…" You swiped at the tears that rolled down your cheeks. "I lost the ring," you finally blurted out. "I'm so sorry. I think it fell down the sink and…" you were full-on crying now, hiccups and all. "I feel horrible…I wanted to stay in Calgary…"

"Oh honey," Chantal was the first one at your side. "It's fine. It's just a piece of jewelry." She hugged your tight, running her hands up and down your back in that motherly way that you needed. "You're not the first woman in the world that it's happened to. In fact, I've done the same thing." She chuckled at the memory. "More than once, actually."

"Really?" It was hard for you to believe that Chantal of all people would be as clumsy as you.

"Yes really." Keith was the one who answered. "Only we couldn't get the plumber here and she made me crawl under the sink and pull apart the drain."

"Ask Matthew about it," Chantal added. "I distinctly remember asking the boys to not turn on the water, but…"

"Those little fuc…"

"Keith!" Everyone laughed as Chantal scolded her husband, and you hoped that someday you and Matthew would look back on this nightmare the same way.

"What am I missing?" Matthew asked walking through the door. It was only then that his mom let you go, so she welcome home her first born.

The afternoon flew by, and soon you were all headed out to dinner, from there Matthew said his goodnight. You wouldn't see him until after the game tomorrow, but you were happy for the time to catch up with your families. Keith and Chantal had been very involved in your writing career after the Mason incident, and though you'd talk to your parents weekly, they were dying to know what was going on. Talks hadn't resumed with any of the production companies that were interested in making your book a movie, but your old editor, Stephen, insisted that he was close to getting things back up and running. It had been for the best considering you'd been concentrating on your relationship with Matthew. Writing was non-existent when he was around, though he always urged you to go and type away at the computer. It just seemed you couldn't get your mind to work when he was around. Road trips were a godsend for that reason alone, as they allowed you to make headway with your recent book. Which you were just putting the finishing touches on. The publishing company couldn't wait to get their hands on it and assured you it would be another bestseller.

"That latest chapter you let me read last night seemed to hit a little close to home," Chantal commented when the two of you were alone the next night at the game. You blushed as Sophia and Xavier's story had somehow become eerily similar to yours and Matt's. "I'm glad you two finally admitted your feelings for each other. I've never seen my son so happy." She pulled you into a side hug as the two of you made your way out of the box and down to the locker room. "Now the question is, are you going to set a date for the wedding?"

It was the question your parents had asked the minute they picked you up. But how did you tell them, that most of your engagement had been just the two of you pretending, at least Chantal knew the truth. That familiar queasiness that had settled in your stomach since you'd lost the ring came back and you swallowed hard before answering. "I don't know…it's just…"

When you hesitated, Chantal prompted. "Matthew never really asked you."

"Yes!" you whisper yelled in relief that she had said the words instead of you.

"I get it, (Y/N). As women we all dream of that perfect moment when the man we love gets down on one knee and well…" She shook her head in dismay. "My son has done everything backward when it comes to you."

"Maybe not everything." Chantal just raised an eyebrow, while you said nothing more, not willing to elaborate on the specifics.

"At any rate, I hope my son wakes up soon. I'm looking forward to having you as my daughter." Chantal's words went straight to your heart, for you'd felt like they were second parents to you for a long time. It was nice to know that they felt the same way. The locker room opened just then, and out came Matthew. "Good game, sweetie." She said moving towards Matthew and enveloping him in a hug. He only side-hugged her, as he was carrying a box under his left side. His father did the same before Matt finally made it to you.

He dropped a kiss on your lips, less heated than normal since most of the family was around. "Good game, Matty."

"Thanks, princess. This is for you." He handed over the box and you looked at it curiously. "Just go in the family room and put it on."

"I thought we were all going out to dinner?" The plan was that the entire family, both yours and his, were headed to one of Matt's favorite restaurants after the game. But now it seemed Matt had other ideas.

"We are. You and I are just making a quick detour." You looked at him and then Chantal, who had a little smirk on her face, and you were starting to wonder if she knew more than she was letting on. "Just go change."

Taryn grabbed you before you had a chance to answer. "Come on. I'll help you." She unceremoniously led you out of the open corridor and into the family room that was off to the side. Everyone had already left, so the room was yours. Once in the room, you opened the box dying to see what was inside. There lay a beautiful white dress with blue floral accents embroidered all around. It was shorter than you expected as you pulled it out, but then Taryn grabbed the overskirt. Full with the same blue trim, it was the perfect complement to the dress. "He's got pretty good taste, for an annoying older brother."

"It's breathtaking," you told as your hand relevantly stroked the fine material.

"Let's put it on." The strapless design fit perfectly as if someone had taken your exact measurements and had the dress constructed just for you. It made you wonder what Matty was doing while you were sleeping. When Taryn attached the overskirt, you twirled around and the dress flowed around you. "You look phenomenal."

"It reminds me of something, but I can't quite put my finger on it."

Taryn folded your clothes and stuck them in the box for you. "Let's not keep him waiting. I'm sure he's dying to see you."

The minute you stepped out the door, there were a ton of oohs and ahhs, but it was the low whistle that Matthew gave that had heat flooding your veins. "You look…wow…I mean gorgeous."

"I feel a little overdressed." Even though Matthew had on his game suit, everyone else was still in more casual, if not Calgary Flames, attire.

"Nonsense, you look beautiful," Keith told you, before giving his son a wink. "See you, kids, later." With that, the entire family left, leaving just you and Matthew standing in the arena hallway.

"You really do look stunning." Matthew came up and finally kissed you. The full-on, soul-wrenching kind that made you weak in the knees. You could get lost when he kissed you like this, but all too soon he was pulling away. "Ready to go?"

"To where exactly?"

"That's a surprise." He laced your fingers with his and the two of you headed out; his parents taking all of your things. Once you were in the car he handed you the sleep mask he always used for afternoon naps. "Put this on?"

"Are you serious?"

"Yes, I'm serious." The blindfold dangled off the end of his fingers and you finally snatched it away in compliance. Matthew started the car the moment you had it on, then shifted into drive and the two of you were off. "No peeking."

You rolled your eyes though Matthew you couldn't see it with the stupid blindfold on. "Why are you making me wear this thing?"

"Duh, so you won't know where we're going."

He turned down a street, or at least you thought he did as your body turned, and you grabbed hold of the dash to catch yourself. This whole week you'd felt uneasy after losing his grandmother's ring, being blindfolded was not helping that at all. "Easy on the turns, please. It's making me queasy."

"Since, when did you become motion sick? You were begging me to go on the Tower of Terror last time we were in Disney."

You wanted to tell him that it was that damn ring, but knew he'd go ballistic again. "Since, you decided to put a blindfold on me and drive like a speed demon."

He grabbed your hand and then sweetly kissed your knuckles. "I'm going to speed limit princess, just relax." It was about fifteen minutes before he put the car in park, and you assumed you were at your destination. "Stay there, I'll come get you."

"You mean I have to leave this on?" You whined. It wasn't that you didn't like surprises it just seemed that Matthew was going a bit too far to keep this one from you.

You had no reply, as he was already out of the car and running around to help you out. The air was chilly when he opened the door, and you wished you'd at least grabbed your coat before Taryn took it. "Ok, watch your step," Matthew said as he grabbed your hand to get you out of the vehicle. His other hand immediately wrapped around your waist so you wouldn't fall. Taking the first step, you felt a little wobbly and were grateful for the support. It was about ten steps before he opened a door and you were engulfed with heat. Your heels made a clicking noise that echoed off the walls, the sound letting you know that no one else was around.

"Where are we?" you asked again, even though you knew he'd never tell you.

"You'll see." It was probably another two hundred feet before Matt opened another door and ushered you through it. The only telling sound was a little creak that the door itself made. "Ok, there are six steps up you have to take, ok?"

"Ok," you answered though you weren't one hundred percent confident since you couldn't see a thing, though you knew Matthew would never let you fall.

You climbed the steps one at a time with Matthew's help. Then it was another few feet before he stopped you. "Ok, wait here a minute."

He let go of you and your stomach flipped a bit, so you took a deep breath to settle your nerves. The smell of flowers filled your nostrils and you wondered if he'd taken you to the Missouri Botanical Gardens. It was then you heard a loud click, followed by a low hum overhead. The sound was once again vaguely familiar to you, yet you couldn't quite place it. A few seconds ticked by as you waited for Matt to finally return.

Matthew was nervous. This could all go extremely well or you could absolutely hate him, that's all he knew, but he was going through with this anyway. He straightened his jacket, cleared his throat, then walked over to stand directly in front of you. "Ok, you can take off the mask now, princess." He specifically used the pet name he so loved to call you as sort of a hint.

You slowly lifted the blindfold from your face. The harsh lighting making you take a minute to adjust to your surroundings. There were flowers everywhere, along with a few fake trees, and in the middle of the stage, there was a cardboard constructed bed. Wait did you say stage? That's when you realized you were back in your middle school auditorium. Matt had transformed it back to the Snow White play you'd performed when you were kids. "Matty," your voice held a note of awe at all he had done. "This is beautiful." For it truly was, yet you still found yourself asking. "But I don't get it?"

"Don't you, princess?" He gestured to your dress and now you knew where its familiarity had come from. While it wasn't near to the homemade design you'd worn years ago, it did have that fairytale quality to it that made you feel like Snow White.

Matthew captured your hand drawing you back to the present. "I had to bring you back here because this…well this is where I first fell in love with you." A smile came to your face at his declaration, while at the same time you started to tear up. "I let way too many years go by to tell you that, but you were my princess then and you're my princess now. Well, if I'm being realistic you're more my queen, but I'll never stop calling you princess." He tucked a small strand of hair behind your ear and you felt yourself lean into his touch. "(Y/N), you've been my best friend for as long as I can remember. You've stood beside me when…well when you shouldn't have that's for sure. I never thought that I was good enough for you…I'm probably still not, yet somehow, I'm still lucky enough that you picked me. Well, at least I hope you'll pick me." His hands started to tremble as he held yours. "I didn't ask you last summer, yet still you agreed to be my…" he rolled his eyes before saying, "fake fiancé. But now I'm asking you for real." He dropped down to one knee and your breath hitched. "(Y/N), you are the love of my life and you would make me the happiest man on this planet if you'd agree to be my wife. Will you marry me?"

"Yes!" You swear the word was out of your mouth before he had even finished asking the questions. "Yes, Matty. A million times yes." This time you were the one shaking, only it was with so much happiness it seemed as if it would just jump right out of your body. He reached into his coat pocket and pulled out a small little black box, flipping it open in his hand. There inside was his grandmother's ring. "Matthew Tkachuk!" His name echoed in the empty hall. "Is that…"

Matthew turned nine different shades of red before answering in a very sheepish voice, "yes." He scurried up off the floor, all the elation from moments ago forgotten. This was the part he'd been dreading for the last two days.

"I've literally been sick about losing this ring and you've had it the whole time."

Again, he mumbled out a weak, "yes." He knew he had to explain before you got irate and changed your mind about marrying him altogether. "I snuck it from the sink when you were taking a shower. I didn't think it would be that big of a deal."

"Not that big of a deal…Matthew, I've been so worried."

"I know. I know. Which is why I did this tonight instead of tomorrow as I planned." He ran his free hand, the one not holding the ring, through his hair. "Believe me, princess, I almost through the whole plan out the window when you got sick on the plane, but…well…I've always wanted you to have this ring. My whole family wants you to have this ring. But I wanted to ask you, not just assume that because you'd agreed to be my fake fiancé that you'd be my real one. I thought about getting you your own, but then I talked to Brady and…"

"Brady was in on this?"

Matthew ducked his head down, then answered. "My whole family is."

"But…How…Did they…Oh My God…Does that mean Brady and Taryn know the truth?" That nauseous feeling from the car, came hurling back with full force. "Oh my god, I think I'm gonna be sick."

"Hey…hey," Matt cooed an arm wrapping around your waist to support you. "It's not that bad, just breathe."

You did as he told you, taking deep breaths in to calm yourself. The last thing you wanted to do was barf all over the gorgeous dress he got you, let alone the stage. Still, that feeling just wouldn't go away. "Where's the garbage?"

Matthew's eyes widen and he quickly scanned looking for something for you. Luckily, there was a big can with a few pieces of debris from set construction off to the side, and he guided you over to it. Matt held your hair back as you unloaded the contents of your stomach into the plastic can. All he could think of was how bad he'd fucked up. This was not how he saw this night going.

Tears sprang to your eyes, as the bile rose from the back of your throat. You willed your body to relax as it continued to churn, but thoughts of the world knowing you'd lied about your relationship made it all the worse. Both yours and Matt's careers could be in jeopardy. Your life had literally just gone from the greatest moment of your life to the worst.

"It's gonna be ok, (Y/N)." Matthew tried to reassure you. "It's only those two. Your parents don't know. No one else knows." His free hand started to rub your back, trying to comfort you. "I swear princess, no one else will find out."

Your stomach started to ease up a bit, though you regretted the nachos and beer you'd had at the game. Matt grabbed the small scrap of cloth from his suit pocket and handed it to you. It was more decorative than anything, but at least it served its purpose as you wiped your mouth clean. "I'm sorry. I don't know what's going on with me."

"You've been under a lot of stress (Y/N), and I'm sorry I contributed to that. But princess, you gotta know that even if it got out that we faked our relationship, in the beginning, it's not going to matter because we love each other now." He continued to rub circles on your back. "As for Brady and Taryn…well, Brady's apparently has known the whole time, or at least he told dad that." You weren't completely shocked at that knowledge, after all, he was both you and Matt's best friend. "And we both know Taryn can smell out a plot a mile away. Don't tell her I said this, but she's definitely smarter than Brady and I put together." That brought a chuckle to your lips. "No one else knows, nor will they ever."

"You're right." It was honestly stupid to make yourself sick over something you couldn't change. Hell, you actually wouldn't change it, because it led you to this moment with Matthew and him proposing. And you totally made a mess of things. "I'm so sorry. I spoiled your whole proposal."

"Princess, you haven't ruined anything." He cupped your chin to look up at him. "I distinctly remember you saying yes when I asked you to marry me. So, unless you're changing your mind this is still the greatest night of my life."

"I'll never change my mind." You saw the sense of relief all over Matthew's face. "Now, give me back my ring," you teased.

"Shit, I dropped the box." Matt's eyes darted over to the center stage where the two of you had been moments ago. The velvet box lay there on the ground, thank god. He made his way over to it, bending to pick it up as you followed behind. "Still in there," he pronounced as he pulled the hinges back. "Are you sure?"

"Yes, silly of course, I'm sure." Removing the ring, he placed it on your left hand and made it official. He made a move to kiss you, but you halted him.

"Oh right," he commented offhandedly, as he remembered you hurling your guts out moments ago. "Feeling better?"

"Not really. Maybe I have a bug or something. It's been bothering me like this for a couple weeks."

"What? I thought this just started a couple days ago with the ring?" He shrugged off his coat and draped it across your shoulders, in case you were getting sick.

"It's been on and off for a couple weeks. Some days are worse than others."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I don't know. You've been on the road or it's in the morning when you're at the rink and by the time you're home; I feel fine." Most times you just chalked it up to eating a bad meal the night before.

Matthew's wheels started to spin, as he took in everything you were saying. "Princess, when was the last time you…uh…had your period?"

"Um," you were trying to think when that was. "Let me check my phone. Shit. It's in my bag." Surely, you'd had it last month. You wracked your brain trying to remember, but the more you thought about it you realized you'd hadn't had one recently. The holidays had been so busy with getting packages out, helping out with the team toy drive, and games, you just forgot about it. November then, you had to have had one. "We've been really careful though."

"Well…except…"

"That first time!"

"And the next day," Matt added and your thoughts traveled back to how heated both encounters had been. Neither one of you had given it a thought to stop and whip on a condom. Besides you were on the pill. Birth control was, like what, ninety-nine percent effective. The voice in the back of your head reminded you that was only when it was taken correctly.

"I may have missed a pill," you admitted, thinking back to when you were in LA. You'd been so upset with what had happened with Mason that you'd packed up all your stuff and headed home. The flight had been late and when you landed the next day, you'd completely forgotten about it. "I think I might be sick again."

"It's gonna be ok, baby."

"Baby? You never call me that." You started to cry, but you really didn't know why.

"I didn't mean it, PRINCESS." Matthew quickly tried to recover hoping not to upset you further, but then you started to giggle. "Princess, are you ok?"

"It's just…" you continued to laugh for really this could only happen to you. "It's the same plot I gave Sophia and Xavier."

Matthew joined you then, as he remembered reading your final chapter. "Oh my god, it is." When the two of you finally got ahold of yourself, Matt gathered you in his arms. "Well, you know they ended up living happily ever after and so will we."

"But are we ready for this? I mean we literally just got engaged."

Matthew shrugged as neither of you may have a choice in the matter. "Is it ideal…no," he answered realistically. "But we know we want kids. You know you're going to make a great mom." Matt was being so reassuring that you almost believed this whole thing could work. "But we're kind of getting ahead of ourselves. We should probably take a test or something."

Thank god, one of you was actually thinking, for it seemed your brain had completely forgotten how to function. "You're right, but everyone is waiting on us. We'll have to do it tomorrow."

"They'll wait. This is more important." Matthew was right, you were sure that your families would hold off any plans until you both arrived. "Besides they weren't heading to the restaurant for a bit. They all knew what was going on. And before you say anything, I told your parents, that I never truly asked you properly with the videotape and everything. So they are none the wiser."

He started walking you off stage then, fingers entwined as you headed out the door. "I love you. You know that right?"

"I do," he smiled back. "But I can tell you right now I love you more."

"You couldn't."

"Don't start, princess. You know you'll never win this one." He kissed your hand sweetly and then led you to the car. "Walgreens is just up the road. We can stop there." It took all of five minutes to pull into the parking lot of the drugstore. "You just want me to go in and get it."

"No, we're in this together." This time his lips found your cheek before you both opened the car door. "Besides I'm getting a toothbrush or something."

Matt chuckled. "Thank goodness, I'm dying to kiss you properly."

You grabbed a package of Colgate wisps before heading to the aisle that had the pregnancy tests. There were several to pick from, so you grabbed a couple and read them quickly. "This one says it has early detection."

"Doubt we need that if you think it was way back at the beginning of November."

If your calculations were correct, that would make you almost twelve weeks. The thought both scared and thrilled you, to think that you'd be that far along. "Ok, this one it is." Heading to the checkout, you realized once again you didn't have your purse with you. "You have your wallet, right?"

"Of course." Matt paid for the items and the two of you headed out the door. "Stupid question but where do you want to go and take this?"

"Well, if we drive home, it's fifteen minutes to get there, then another fifteen to take the test probably, and then another twenty to the restaurant. Which means we'll be another hour late."

"Restaurant it is." Matthew declared and headed that way, which was only about a ten-minute drive from where you were. "We have the back room, so no one should see us come in."

"We're really going to take this test in a public restroom? Together?"

"Why not."

Chantal's words from earlier echoed in your mind. "Your mom was right; we do everything backward." Matt cocked an eyebrow at you for further explanation. "Well, technically she said you, but I'm lumping myself in at this point."

"It's going to be ok. You know that."

"As long as you're with me, I know it will be." Matthew pulled into the restaurant then. You took a moment to shed the overskirt of your dress before stepping out of the car, then made your way inside. Matthew immediately told the host that you were here for the party in the back, but that you needed a few minutes. Then the two of you headed over to where the restrooms were. You opened the ladies' room door and Matt followed you. "You can't…"

He just pushed you gently through the door before you could protest more. The lady washing her hands at the sink immediately took notice of the two of you and humphed her dismay. "It's not what you think," Matthew tried to explain to her but gave up when she walked out. "Is there a lock on this thing?"

"Doubtful."

"Then go in the big stall." You started to walk down to the end and he followed. "I'm not standing out there alone," he added when you looked at him skeptically.

"Fine." You'd already read the directions and knew what you had to do, though peeing with an audience was a bit daunting. Once you were done, you put the cap back on and handed it over to Matthew, who had his timer set. "Wait here. I'm washing my hands."

It took all of thirty seconds to do that before you slipped back in the stall. "I think we have our answer," Matt declared as you entered. He handed you the stick, which clearly said 'YES+'. When your eyes finally looked up at him, he was grinning ear to ear. "Are you happy?"

A lone single tear fell down your cheek and you quickly swiped it away, before nodding. "Yeah, I really am. Is that bad?"

"Hell, no it's not bad." He crushed you to his chest, lifting you slightly. "I'm ecstatic. We're having a baby!" The bathroom door opened and you both immediately quieted down. "Let's get out of here," he whispered. As soon as you were out the door, his lips covered yours. The happiness of all that happened today being poured into every caress of your lips. "Are you sure you're happy about this?" He asked once the two of you broke apart.

"Of course, I am. I mean it's not planned but how can I not be happy about having your child." It was something you'd only dreamed of and never thought that it would actually happen. "Though it means we'll have to postpone the whole wedding for a bit."

"Why?"

You glared at him disapprovingly. "Even if we decided to pull off a summer wedding. I'm going to be like eight months pregnant. I'm not walking down the aisle looking like a whale."

"You're not going to look like a whale." Your scowl only intensified at his words. "Ok, so no summer wedding…but what about now."

"I'm sorry what?"

"We leave for Vegas the day after tomorrow. We could get married there."

While not the wedding of your dreams, it did mean that the two of you would be legally married before the baby arrived. "Ok, let's do it. Just not by Elvis."

"Deal. One word to my mom and she'll have something elaborate planned in no time. We are telling everyone, aren't we?"

"I mean…if we want them at the wedding, we kind of have to." He clasped your hands and started to almost pull you toward the back room. The two of you giddy with happiness the whole way back.

As soon you entered the whole family cheered. "So, is it official?" Taryn asked first, seeing the wide grins you both had.

Matthew looked at you and you looked at him before he said. "Yes." The whole family erupted in cheers. "But…" Matthew announced over all the noise.

"Oh, god," you heard his dad sigh. You knew Keith had to be fearing the worse.

Your grip on Matt's hand tightened as you felt a bit more anxious. "There's a bit more." Everyone's eyes were on the two of you, waiting for what Matthew would say next. "We're getting married in Vegas." The look of shock on your families' faces was quite comical. Especially, Keith as his hand immediately slapped his forehead. Before anyone could protest or question your impromptu decision Matt added, "Because we're having a baby."

"Oh my god," you weren't sure if it was your mom or Chantal's excited exclamation but they were both out of their seats in seconds. Hugs were coming from every direction as everyone congratulated the two of you.

"Guess you were right," you told Chantal. "We do everything backward."

"It doesn't matter what direction you do them in, sweetheart, as long as you both are happy and in love."

Matthew came from behind and wrapped his arms around your midsection, just catching the last of what his mom said. "We are most definitely in love," he dropped his voice down then. "No more pretending for us. She's stuck with me forever."

"I guess it's a good thing I love you, Matthew Tkachuk."

"And I love you, (Y/N)."  

[queen-haq]

Fic: A Woman Reborn - Part 9

Fic: A Woman Reborn (Part 9)

Pairing: Billy Russo X Reader (from A Woman Scorned)

Rating: R / 18+ only

A/N: This is a sequel to A Woman Scorned and takes place a few years after the events of AWS.

MasterList (includes links to AWS and previous chapters here)

Summary: You and Billy are happily married when tragedy strikes, jeopardizing your relationship and everything you two have built together. Can the two of you find your way back to each other or is the special bond you once shared broken forever?

beautiful moodboard courtesy of @thatbritishactor​

It was Saturday afternoon and you’d already tackled all the things you needed to do for the day. After returning from Chicago yesterday, you’d spent the day unpacking and doing laundry, and earlier this morning you’d completed your grocery shopping and done some meal preps. Staying busy helped keep your mind off things like your mom. And when your brain wasn’t focused on her, it was concentrated on stupid Billy. His arrogant words still rung in your ear, infuriating you every time you thought about it. Nope. Absolutely not. You refused to waste any more of your mental energy on that jackass.

The one thing you still had to do was have a conversation with Karen about Matt, sooner the better. You really should have talked to her before storming off to Matt’s and sleeping with him but that night your mind had been on other things. You really hoped Karen wouldn’t be hurt. Even if she was with Frank now and they seemed happy, seeing a friend date an ex was awkward. The last thing you wanted was to jeopardize your friendship, especially as she’d been very supportive during the past few years.

Hesitantly you picked up the phone and sent Karen a text asking to meet for drinks.

She replied shortly after and the two of you set a time and place.

Feeling jittery and anxious, you decided to go for a walk.

***

Later that evening you and Karen were at a restaurant, catching up when the conversation turned to your mom.

“You should take more time off. Frank and Curtis will understand,” Karen said, biting into a crunchy piece of crab Rangoon.

You followed suit, shaking your head. “No, I’d rather work.”

“Are you sure you’re okay? I asked the guys about the details for the service, I thought maybe you wanted us to be there-”

“Didn’t want to inconvenience you guys. Plus, she and I weren’t very close.”

Karen gave you a knowing glance. She didn’t ask you to elaborate, and you didn’t volunteer any information. Something in her expression conveyed that she understood complicated family dynamics and the desire to keep the past in the past- for which you were grateful.

“So what did you want to talk about?”

Nervous, you bit the inside of your cheek. “I need to tell you something. I… I hooked up with Matt last week.”

Karen quirked her eyebrow, surprised. “Oh.”

“I know you guys used to date before, and I shouldn’t have done it. I just – well, it happened. I went over to his place and we started talking and-”

“Y/N, seriously, you don’t need to explain. Matt and I went out on like three dates, that’s all.”

“Are you sure? If you’re upset with me, I get it.”

“I’m not hurt, don’t worry. What I felt for Matt, it was a crush. Nothing more. He and I are better as friends and I’m…” She dipped her head to the side, wearing a glowing smile. “I’m happy with Frank.”

“You guys seem really good together.”

Karen sipped her wine. “So are you and Matt dating or just hooking up?”

“I have no idea. I’m glad it happened though. It was fun,” you admitted, chuckling. “To be honest, we haven’t even gone out on a date.”

“Okay…” her voice trailed off, a hesitant expression on her face.

“What is it?”

She exhaled a resigned sigh. “Please be careful. Matt is a great guy but he doesn’t let people in very easily.”

“I know how that is.”

“And he likes to take on the weight of the world on his shoulders. It’s easy to start seeing him as a knight in shining armour - but he’s not. So don’t fall in love with him thinking he’s perfect, he’s definitely not.”

“No danger of that, don’t worry.”

The truth was, you never wanted to fall in love again. You were ready to move on, maybe even be in a relationship with someone, but you refused to risk your heart like before. Your relationship with Billy had meant everything to you, he’d been your whole world, and losing him had devastated you completely. You didn’t simply lose your husband after the accident, you lost your entire sense of being, your confidence, even your self-worth. If falling in love and losing it meant experiencing that depth of pain and self-loathing again, you didn’t want any part of it.

“Are you okay?”

You offered her a small nod. “I’m fine.”

“I heard Billy’s back at Anvil again.”

You bit down on your lip, avoiding Karen’s gaze. “Yeah.”

Tomorrow would be the first time you’d be seeing him since he came to your hotel room in Chicago and you weren’t looking forward to it. Not for a second did you believe his words that night were sincere. You still remembered how he’d look at you before the divorce, the sheer contempt and hatred he felt for you. After he came out of his coma, he was repulsed by you, your appearance, your personality – everything that made you you – and it all chipped away at your confidence until there was nothing left. And now he was pretending he wanted you? You weren’t a fool. He was up to something and you wanted no part of it.

“How’s that going?”

You shrugged your shoulders. “All he wants to do is goad me into arguments.”

“How do you think he’ll handle the Matt thing?”

“It’s none of his business.”

“Is he still with Dumont?” Karen asked.

“Don’t know, don’t care,” you bit out. “Look, do me a favour – don’t tell Frank and Curtis about the whole Matt thing. It’s still pretty new and I just don’t want any lectures from them.”

“Why would they? It’s none of their business.”

“Yeah well, Frank told me the other day I needed to be patient with Billy and-”

“You’ve been more than patient! You don’t owe Billy anything, especially when he despises you and treats you the way he does.” Karen paused. “I shouldn’t-”

“It’s fine. It’s true.” Even though you pretended it didn’t bother you, you cringed internally. You’d always been reserved, preferring to keep things to yourself, but in the last two years people who you considered family had been witness to your crumbling marriage and all your humiliations. You hated it, it made you feel vulnerable and exposed and pathetic, another reason why it was crucial you moved on – you wanted to stop being an object of pity for the world.

“You deserve to be happy.”

The genuine sincerity in Karen’s words touched your heart. “Thank you.”

“And don’t worry, I’ll keep my mouth shut.”

You sent her a grateful smile.  

“Frank mentioned that there’s some sort of gala you guys need to attend soon?”

It was the annual fundraiser that had become a significant networking function within the sector. For a mid-size company like Anvil, attendance was critical because it provided a lot of exposure to affluent clients and potential for lucrative contracts. In the first year after Billy’s accident, there had been no Anvil presence and it had negatively impacted the company’s bottom line. The following year, you rectified the situation.  

“Yeah, it’s a pretty important event.”

“So you’re going?”

“Have to. We purchased a table for 6 and it was bloody expensive. Frank wasn’t happy about that.”

Karen laughed. “Yeah, he’s also pissed about having to wear a tux.”

“He has no choice. It’s a formal event. Black tie and all.”

The two of you made plans to go shopping together and eventually the conversation turned to Karen’s work and the latest article she was working on.

***

Billy couldn’t keep his eyes off of you as you reviewed the financial metrics for the last quarter. It’s not that he wasn’t paying attention, he definitely was and he was happy that Anvil had met the target projections, but this shit was a lot more enjoyable when you were the one explaining them. Especially when you looked so hot doing it. Dressed in a black and white plaid tweed dress that was moulded to your body and paired with turquoise heels – a combination that shouldn’t have worked but hell yeah it did – you discussed the metrics and the upcoming quarter. Frank and Curtis liked to lead meetings sitting down but that wasn’t your style. You preferred to walk around and own the room when you were presenting, making eye contact with your audience and speaking to them directly as if you were telling an interesting story rather than reciting dry data. Of course it annoyed Billy that you never looked at him.

As easy as you made it look though, that kind of effortless presentation skills didn’t come easy to you. You practiced and prepared. He recalled countless nights where he played the part of the audience, where he helped you practice when you were especially nervous going in front of the investor board at Valiant, how there were times you were feeling low or uninspired and then he’d have to shut your laptop and force you to take a walk with him so you could rejuvenate yourself mentally.

More and more he remembered small details about your married life together and the hollow ache in his chest expanded. You liked sleeping in whereas he was usually up at the crack of dawn, whether it was the weekend or not – a habit he formed from being a marine. You hated cooking, and you were terrible at it. But every once in a while you’d be inspired to cook something for him which he’d be forced to taste and no matter how hard he tried to mask his reactions you would always see through the ruse. Then he’d have to coddle you and appease you to make you feel better which was his favourite part. When you were on your period you turned into both a raging bitch and a crying mess but he also loved how needy you were during those times. You’d be more affectionate than usual, asking for hugs, clinging to him while he prepped hot water bags for your body aches. You were so damn independent most of the time but not when you were sick or feeling unwell and then you turned into a high maintenance mistress who he absolutely loved lavishing attention on.

That was something else he remembered clearly: the constant state of panic and fear he was in at the thought of losing you. It didn’t matter if everything was fine and things were going great, he was always paranoid that you’d leave him.

“So if there aren’t any other questions, that’s it. Enjoy your lunch!”

Your words brought him out of his reverie, and he realized everyone else was leaving the boardroom. You, however, were busy typing on your laptop, back to work as always. That was the thing about you, you were a workaholic and it was him who had to remind you to establish boundaries and take care of yourself. “You should have taken more days off,” he remarked.

You looked up, apparently surprised he was still lingering in the room. “I’m fine,” you replied in a clipped tone.

“Are you? I know how messed up things were between you and your mom.”

“You don’t know anything.”

As you gathered your things together, he stood up and approached the door, leaning back against it. He loved watching you, especially when you were hellbent on ignoring him. You tried to act unaffected but he knew you and your body too well, knew when a heated blush started at your neck and slowly spread up to your cheeks, how your hands shook ever so slightly because your heart was pounding so hard, how aroused you got when all he did was simply look at you.

You approached the door, stopping in front of him. “Get out of my way, Billy. I have things to do.”

He angled forward slightly, finding himself in the perfect position to breathe in both your perfume and the scent of jasmine in your shampoo. Compelled to touch you, he reached out to brush the bottom strands of your hair. “Want to know why I love this new haircut so much?”

You looked taken aback by his words, your cheeks flushed. “I don’t give a shit.”

He smirked. “Gives me a better view of your body. Front and back.”

You rolled your eyes. “Really? That’s a terrible line.”

He laughed. “It’s the truth.”

“It’s bullshit,” you countered.

His eyes dropped to your lips, aching to taste you. He hadn’t kissed you in so fucking long, he missed it, missed the way you’d moan into his mouth and grab him. The way your tongue played with his, how frustrated you’d get when he teased you mercilessly, your soft groans when his beard scraped against your soft flesh, the friction turning you on.

Your breaths grew heavy, drawing his attention to the swell of your breasts and it took every fucking bit of self-control he had not to sink his face into your tits. He used to be able to make you come just by playing with your nipples – were you still that sensitive? Could he still do it? His cock twitched, he was dying to find out.

“Stop looking at me like that.” Your attempt at sounding calm was utter bullshit, he could hear how excited you were in the breathy tone of your voice.

“Like what?” he teased, cocking his eyebrow. “Like I’m picturing you naked right now? Like I’m remembering how fucking sweet your pussy tastes when I’m eating you out? How goddamn divine your cunt feels when I’m inside you and you’re screaming my name?”

“Stop!” you snapped, taking a step back.

“I bet you’re dripping wet right now.”

Your eyes burned with rage and passion when you met his gaze. “Fuck you!”

“Ready and willing, sweetheart.”

Tension blanketed the air, thick and palpable, you trying to cling to your hostility, him curbing the urge to storm over and fuck you on the boardroom table. He felt your resolve waver with every second, the desperation in your eyes akin to an animal trapped. You turned around suddenly, refusing to look at him, and he knew it was a defensive tactic, a way for you to hold onto your anger so he wouldn’t slip through. Fuck that. He moved forward until he was standing behind you, his front flush against your back, his hands on your sides, fisting your dress. He saw you grip the edges of the boardroom table, squeezing so hard that your knuckles were visibly paler than the rest of your skin.

“I know I said two weeks,” he murmured, nuzzling your hair, inhaling you in. “But we don’t have to wait that long. We don’t need to.”

“Oh, was that for my benefit? What do you think is gonna happen in two weeks, Billy? Do you think I’m just gonna get over everything and spread my legs for you?”

Annoyed, he pressed himself tightly against you, wanting you to know exactly how goddamn hard he was for you. “We start new.”

“But I’m not interested in that. I don’t want to have anything to do with you.”

Your words hurt, even though the rational part of him knew it was a lie and a form of self-preservation. You were trying to protect yourself but he wasn’t going to let you hide from him. His hand slid in between your legs, trailing up. Your breath hitched in your throat, hips swaying closer – exactly what he wanted. Fingers pressed against the fabric of your lace panties, finding them soaking wet, because no matter how much you fought with him you still wanted him. Even though he was desperate to fill you with his cock and fuck you senseless, he held back. You pulsed under his touch as he expertly caressed your pussy and soon your body rocked against his erection, silently urging for more – but he didn’t, instead only teasing you. “Been so long. Hasn’t it?”

Your body arched against him, boneless and fluid when his fingers thrummed inside you. He reached around to cup your left breast with his free hand, thumb brushing against your hardened nipple which he felt despite the layers of fabric. “You want this. You want me…” he insisted, nipping your earlobe.

A guttural moan escaped your lips.

“Say it, babe.”

He sensed you emotionally withdrawing from him right away, the moment now broken. Fuck! He wanted to kick himself for pushing you because the demand in his voice broke the spell you were under. 

You pulled his hand away from between your legs and started straightening your dress. “You’re good at getting women off, Billy. You always have been. So, yeah, I want you but it doesn’t mean anything.”

He released his grip on you, physically maneuvering you around so you were facing him again. You were spouting bullshit and he was sick of it. “You expect me to believe you feel nothing for me? That’s a fucking lie, sweetheart. We both know that.”

“What do you want from me?”

He contemplated sweetening his words so it didn’t piss you off further – but decided to go with honesty instead. “Everything.”

You scoffed, shaking your head. “You don’t ask for much, do you?”

He shrugged his shoulders. “You wanted the truth.”

“But you’re not giving me the truth. What you’re doing is feeding me lines, you’re trying to seduce me because you want something. So why don’t you just drop the act and tell me what it is?”

Anger swept over him. “Why is it so hard for you to believe I want you?”

“Because you had me and you threw me away! You broke my fucking heart!”

Your lips trembled as you lashed out at him. Hurt saturated your voice, it was etched on your face, and all that anguish instantly elicited a flood of shame and regret within him. “Y/N, I-”

You shoved him away. “If you ever touch me again I’m going to put in my resignation effective immediately.” You were back in control. The walls were up, all signs of vulnerability already tucked away. “I’m not a fucking toy for you to play with and I’m done putting up with your shit. The only reason I’m here is because your friends begged me for help.” Jaw clenched, laptop flush against your chest, your gaze was icy-cold and your voice blank. “If you harass me again or pull another stunt like this, I’ll fucking walk out of here and never look back. Anvil will sink without me, and so will Frank and Curtis, and you’ll be the one responsible.”

He didn’t give a shit about Anvil or even Frank and Curtis. All he cared about was you and making things right again. “Can we just go somewhere and talk? Please?”

“I have nothing to say to you.”

You were pissing him off. How was he supposed to fix things if you wouldn’t even talk to him? “Stop being so goddamn stubborn.”

Before you could fire back a response, Curtis walked into the boardroom. Immediately his eyes drifted between him and you, obviously picking up on the tension in the air. “Everything okay here?”

“No, Curtis, everything isn’t okay.” Your voice was firm, rigid. “Every time I turn around your buddy here is either trying to provoke me into a fight or outright harassing me and I’m sick of it. I can’t keep working like this. I won’t! So you can either convince him to leave me alone or I put in my resignation. Your call.”

You stormed out, careful not to touch Billy as you walked past him.

“Really?” Curtis asked, giving him a disappointed glance. “I get that you two are divorced now but you can’t just go around disrespecting her. She doesn’t deserve to be treated like shit, not after everything she’s done for you. And us!”

Billy exhaled a heavy sigh, taking a seat. “Wasn’t trying to piss her off. Just wanted to talk to her.”

“She doesn’t want to listen, and she doesn’t have to.” Curtis took the seat next to him. “Leave her alone, Billy. She just lost her mom and she’s probably still hurting from the divorce. She needs time to recover and she can’t do that if you’re always talking smack to her face.”

Billy remained quiet, digesting Curtis’s words.

“I know you don’t remember any of this but there was a time when you loved that woman. You would have died for her and she’d have done the same. Just cause things changed for you and you hate her-”

“Of course I don’t hate her!” Billy snapped.

Curtis shot him a pointed glance. “All you’ve done for the last year is bitch about how much she’s stifling you. Then you messed around on her and filed for divorce. Maybe you don’t hate her but you sure as hell don’t care either. At least let her be so she can move on and be happy.”

Billy started pacing the floor. “All of that was before - when my head was still messed up from the accident and I was confused. But now things are different, everyday I’m around her I remember more stuff. It’s all coming back and I’m not gonna give up on us! She just needs to let me prove-”

“Bro…” Curtis sent him a pitying glance, like Billy was some kind of fucking idiot. “It’s too late for that after everything that’s happened. You gotta see that.”

“Fuck you, Curtis! You don’t know anything about me and her, the shit we’ve gone through. I’m not gonna walk away from her just to make things easier for everyone!”

Curtis stood up. “Fine. Do what you want. But you keep pushing her this way and she’s gonna run and never look back. Hope you’re ready for that, brother.”

Alone again now that Curtis left, he flung a chair across the room.

***

A week later

It started off like any other day. Work in the morning, catching glimpses of you while you went in and out of the office, in the hallway, during meetings. Since his last confrontation with you he kept his distance at work – not because he was giving up like the entire fucking world wanted him to do, but ‘cause you were still grappling with the loss of your mom and he didn’t want to make things more difficult for you. So yeah, he stayed away during the day - but at night, no, he couldn’t do that.

He rented an apartment in one of the buildings in your neighbourhood, facing your new place, and set up the perfect spot to see into your living room and bedroom, and for the past few nights he watched you to his heart’s content. Davina came over one evening and the two of you hung out, drinking and talking. You looked happy, which made him smile. The next night all you did was work and drink by yourself, and he worried about you pushing yourself too hard.

Tonight he planned to do the same again but Frankie and Curtis insisted on hanging out so he spent most of the evening with them. Things were still strained between him and Curtis after their last argument but they’d avoided the subject of you and mostly talked about other shit.

It was almost ten when he came back to the apartment. He was grabbing a beer from the fridge before resuming his position at the window when cold dread struck in the pit of his stomach. The same instinct that had saved his life many times over when he was out in the field, warning him that he was in danger. Forgetting the beer, he quickly went to the window and grabbed the binoculars to check on you.

You were dressed in some asshole’s shirt, your legs bare, flashing a contented smile that Billy knew all too well. The same smile you wore when you were happy. Sated. When you’d just been fucked out of your mind. And then he saw the fucking lawyer, naked and grinning, putting his arms around you – you – and you turned around to kiss him.

He thought he knew pain, thought he understood the full depravity of violence and what it could do to someone’s mind, their body, how it could break them piece by piece. He’d been tortured before, he’d also been one to torture others, killing out of necessity, out of amusement, because he’d been a soldier following orders but also because it served his own selfish needs. So this, this fucking absolute devastation of his heart should not have felt as terrible as it did, because he knew goddamn well there were worse forms of pain – and yet, this, this was the one that knocked the breath out of his lungs and crushed him mind, body and soul.

You.

You brought his world crashing down.

A/N - Feedback is adored and cherished :) Please leave your thoughts on this post or in my askbox. I always love to hear from you guys!

And if you’re bored or interested in reading Darkling fic written by yours truly, I’ve been reposting the chapters on my Tumblr . Feel free to check it out.

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[brainrotcharacters]

Not A Bother If It’s You

note: Matt is a comfort character, and I'm projecting my anxieties again. If you ain't in the mood for angst comfort, don't mind me. unedited.

ship: college!student!Matt x college!student!reader

summary: college (derogatory)

tags: mutual pining, parents worry about their child's future, angst comfort,

"What's going to happen to you when we're gone?"

If your parents screamed instead, it would have been easier. But we can't have nice things.

"I'd tell you to make room for me in that coffin." you drawled, pouring yourself a glass of alcohol. "I can imagine it's a big one."

Your dad crossed the space, snatching the glass from your hand and chucking it at the far wall. You didn't flinch; you expected it. The pieces of glass sparkled on the floor, the brown liquid spreading like the numbness you pushed into your arms and your legs.

He turned back and grabbed you by the chin. His eyes were bright with fury, but when you looked closer, there was fear. That you were throwing your life away. There was regret that he should've been better.

"Stop fucking around, you understand me?" he lowly said. "I thought you were okay. You said you were okay. I gave you everything I could, your mother and I sacrificed so much for you, and this is the thanks we get?"

If you breathed too deeply, you'd start crying.

"A full scholarship, all these goddamn electronics, and you wanna tap out when you're so close to the end. Help me understand how you became so stupid."

"Not everyone gets the privileges you've been given." your mother's voice was softer, and emphasized the points. "Not everyone is lucky to have both their moms and dads. You would throw away your three years and blame us for your misery."

Your father released you, hands on his waist as he strode away. His broad shoulders rose and fell with the effort of breathing. "I don't- I never blamed you."

Didn't you?

"How will you fend for yourself? Huh?" your father demanded. "Some rich executive asshole is going to walk all over you, and you won't be able to do anything about it because you're an idiot and you're desperate!"

"I have to go." you've been glancing at the door. In as less strides as possible, you grabbed your knife, license to carry, one of Matt's hoodies from the back of a chair, and a piece of cloth to soak with your tears and snot later.

You power walked to the door, where your mother was waiting. "Where are you going?"

"I need to calm down. So do you." you said in a shuddering breath.

Her face twisted into a deeper disapproval. "You, calm down? You don't get to be angry. You betrayed us. You know your dad's telling the truth."

"Please let me go." no, say it louder. Stronger.

Something behind you caught her eye, and she stepped away. You rush out quick, knowing your father was watching the back of your head.

"Why'd you let her go?"

He stared at your form until you were completely out of sight. "The jacket she took. It was Murdock's."

Your mother blinked. "Matthew, the blind kid at law school?"

Your father sighed, and moved away.

Matt was waiting for you on the fifth pew of the church. It was with no small amount of male pride that his hoodie (stolen by, and then given to you) grazed back and forth against your skin as you walked closer to him. "Did you text me while they were talking to you?"

"Before. My dad would have destroyed my phone otherwise."

He scooted over, and you settled down beside him, forehead on the pew in front of you. "Thanks... for making time."

"I keep telling you, it's not a bother if it's you."

The lump in your throat grows. Things would be better if you had the right to Matt's hugs, Matt's kisses, Matt's love, just Matt. If he could think of you and the next word that comes to mind is 'partner', you would have at least one win. The greatest win of them all.

"I wanna fucking die, Matt." you said through a hollow laugh, before a sob slipped out. You ultimately gave up, letting the tear stains form.

Matt heard his own heartbeat quicken. A world with no you, when he hasn’t yet even asked you on an official date? All he would ever have to remember you by was videos and the regret that he was too slow. But this was not a situation where he could mention it. His bullshit can wait until after you feel better. 

"You don't mean that." he tapped your foot with his, voice consistently soft and easy. "I remember you telling me that the next time you say that, I'm supposed to say 'you really just want to kill something inside you'. So?"

You laughed through the tears, seeing him smile proudly to himself. "Smartass."

“I’m just doing what you told me to do.” Matt sighs. "I don't intend to abandon you anytime soon, sweetheart. You know what that means?"

You prompted under your breath. "What, Matt?"

"I mean, I will eliminate anything that I believe puts you and me in danger. Including how this can spiral." he tapped your temple with a finger. "The only way I'll get out of your hair is if you ask it of me. You have to understand that."

You let yourself breathe deeper. "Careful, or I'll start thinking you have a crush on me."

“Bold words from the person wearing my clothes.”

“I don’t have a strong enough defense.“

Matt laughed, and all was right with the world. “We can think of something.”

[twinklelilstarkey]

Relieved - Matthew Tkachuk

Words: 1.7k+

Type: Fluff

Summary: Matthew has to go back to work just days after you give birth to his son and he absolutely hates it.

Warnings: Female!Reader. Anxiety (maybe, separation anxiety). Kinda rude Matty. Mentions of soreness and lack of sleep (from birth).

It has been 2 days since you were dismissed from the hospital. Two days since you have officially become a mother. And two days since you haven’t slept a full night without waking up at least 4 times during it.

Your body is still very sore, but medicine helps. Yet it’s not like you move a lot around the house.

Matthew, your boyfriend and dad of your kid, does not let you get up most times the baby cries. He always says that he will check and then if you’re needed, he’ll bring the baby to you. All of this because he knows that you’re tired and really doesn’t want you to tire yourself out further or go through any pain from how sore you are, over something that he can do.

Bad thing work calls quick. You’ll be on maternity leave for at least one more month, but Matt? Yeah, no, his team supposedly already needs him back.

And he’s not happy about it.

“Baby, I’ll be fine.” You tell him in a low whisper. “You don’t have to worry that much.”

He clenches his jaw and looks out of the window, clearly annoyed. He’s not wearing a shirt and is holding the newborn baby close to his chest as he sleeps peacefully.

Matt looks down at his son, staring at his small chubby face with adoration, as it is kind of smooshed against his warm skin, which makes his lips slightly parted, and he continues to contemplate calling his coach and just announce his absence last minute.

“He’ll probably still be asleep when you come back.” You tell him, gaining his attention again. “We’ll both be fine.”

“And if something happens?” He asks, also in a whisper, “I won’t be able to pick up the phone and come home.”

“Your mom is just a few blocks away at the hotel, remember?” You ask softly, “I promise that if something happens she’ll be the first person I call.”

He thinks about it for a second and looks down at the baby again.

“She’ll probably get here in less than 2 minutes too.” You add to lighten the mood.

A grin appears over his lips at the sound of your words and he gives his head a slight shake. You smile and he leans away from the wall beside the bedroom window.

Matthew sits down beside you on the side of the bed and you move a bit to sit closer to him. You two look down at the sleeping baby, admiring him as if he’s just the most peaceful thing in the world and didn’t wail his little lungs out just about half an hour ago.

You lean your cheek against Matthew’s naked shoulder and he lays his head against yours, letting the two of you sit in the peaceful silence as he rethinks his options.

“I’ll go.” He finally whispers, “But promise me you’ll call my mom right away. And that you’ll always have your phone with you.”

“I promise.” You say with a slight grin.

You lift your head off his shoulder really slowly, so he can lift his first, and you move a bit on the bed to move in even closer to him. You give a quick kiss on the lips before giving him two more on the cheek and offer him a smile.

“Everything’s going to be fine.” You tell him in a whisper.

(...)

Throughout the warmups and game, Matthew’s mind is going a mile a second. 

Sure, he’s a professional athlete, he’s supposed to be able to put everything in the back of his mind and only focus on the game and nothing else. But it doesn’t really work that way. 

From the time he stepped foot outside of the apartment and inside the arena, he feels like his heart is continuously skipping beats and accelerating for no reason.

And the fact that everyone that would see him walking to or around the locker room would congratulate him for the second time for being a first-time dad, is just making matters worse. 

How is he supposed to be focused on something when everyone just keeps on reminding him who he has at home?

Warm-ups were awful, he just wanted to do one more lap, go take his gear off, and go home. It’s going to take him hours to leave that place and knowing that is just worsening this whole situation.

You, on the other hand, are more than calm. To be completely honest, you’re sitting in bed half-asleep for most of the time. As well as the baby, who is sleeping on his little crib beside your bed, peacefully, as the game plays in a soft mumble on your bedroom’s TV. 

You’ve also now come to realize that the voices of the casters over the sound of blades on the ice are surprisingly relaxing when left at a certain volume. To you, at least, a mother who hasn’t slept more than 3 hours for the past few days.

While you were taking your very peaceful nap, Matthew was still a nervous wreck. He’s made sure that one of his trainers has his phone just in case something happens. Something that, of course, they never do but today is the big exception.

And surprisingly, he scored in the second period. 

Matthew honestly felt like he was on autopilot the whole game, so it even came as a shock to him that he did it. Which some people did notice since he had a more confused look on his face than anything while everyone around him celebrated. 

And right as the game went to intermission, he thought he was being able to put home aside for a second. But that was only until the god damn intermission interview.

“Congratulations on the new addition to the family , by the way. How’s everything going back home?”

Damn you, whoever decided to make that question. He did answer with a smile and a soft tone, seeming to everyone like he’s an under-control-over-his-emotions dad and not at all freaking the fuck out.

You? Still fast asleep. Just like the baby.

By the time the third period reached its half, Matthew was already seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. 

He’s almost home.

And you? Well, this time you’re not asleep anymore. You’re changing a diaper and then comforting your very small baby against your upper chest as you walk around the house.

It still amazes you how such a small being can scream so loud.

You used the opportunity of being up on your feet and with the baby with you to go actually eat something. Which was kind of hard to do with only one hand, but not impossible.

You texted back Chantal, Matt’s mom, just to let her know that you are okay and that you were even able to take a nap, which as an answer you got all types of celebration emojis.

Everything was going pretty okay and honestly, that nap worked wonders with you. You felt exhausted when Matthew left, and now you feel as strong as ever. Still sore, but strong.

After eating and drinking tones of water, you walked back to the bedroom to watch the end of the game. You had to eventually feed the baby as well but that went fairly easy.

You had to give yourself a pat on the back after this whole thing, everything went so well that it seemed like you’re truly getting the hang of it. For now, at least.

The game ended, the Flames won, and Matthew was ready to go home. 

That is until he’s told that he has press to do. He swears he almost hit someone with his stick or even helmet. Like, come on, people!

And this time he did not have the smile nor a soft tone, he looked pissed, which some people found funny. 

At least some questions were quick and easy to answer, but there still were the quite annoying ones he’s grown accustomed to.

He was out of his chair as soon as the words ‘the questions are do-’ left someone's mouth. Rude? Probably, but today is not the day to throw that in his face.

The shower was probably the quickest one he’s ever taken and he thinks he didn’t even dry himself off completely when he started getting dressed. 

Speeding out of the parking lot, home he went.

He doesn’t even think he parked his car correctly, but he was out of the car and inside the house in a matter of seconds.

You heard him from the bedroom let his bag fall by the lobby of the house and his quick footsteps over the wooden floor of the hallway. 

A few seconds later, Matthew appears in the bedroom’s doorway and his eyes are staring down at you right away.

“Hi!” You say with a smile.

“Did he sleep this whole time?” He asks, a slight shock on his face.

“No,” You say with a smile, “But he might go to sleep again in a few.”

You look down at the small baby and you hear Matthew making his way to the bed. He ignores the fact that he’s still wearing his very uncomfortable suit and sits next to you, leaning his back against the headboard while eyeing his son staring at the ceiling while what looks like chewing on his tongue.

“Do you want to hold him?” You ask him as he stares intensely.

A shy smile grows on his face and you smile back as you see that as a big ol’ silent yes. 

You lean away from the bed’s headboard and turn a bit to Matthew to get a better angle. He slowly and safely takes his baby from your arms, who automatically leans on whatever warmth is next to him - that being Matt’s chest.

Matt doesn’t feel stressed, anxious, mad, or even tired anymore. He just feels relieved that he’s back home.

You look at two of them and your heart completely melts at the image you swear you can look at for the rest of your life. 

What is there not to love about this?

Baby fever is still going strong, so I had to write this, don’t hate me.

[hockeyboysimagines]

All good boys go to Heaven, but bad boys bring Heaven to you.

Chapter 9

Warnings: Language, some angst, some fluff.

Okay third time is supposed to be a charm. Tumblr said they fixed the problem so my things should appear in the tags again. Hopefully it’s actually fixed this time and I can start posting again. One more chapter after this! Then I’ll start working on PLD, Carter and Ashes and Wine! Let me know what you think!!!

Just imagine being on the other end of this look. Sheesh🥵🥵

“Hows our girl doing?”

Matt turned to find Johnny had taken the seat next to him in the locker room. Word had spread through the team about what had happened to Hallie. While it was awesome to be a part of an organization that really cared about him and his personal life, he didn’t want to talk about it anymore. He’d barely slept and he was playing like shit, but he couldn’t get any rest until she was awake and okay, and he knew for sure if she hated him or not. He was emotionally and mentally drained and he wasn’t sure how much more he could take.

“She hasn’t woken up yet.” His voice cracked at the end. It had been awful to find her that way, and even worse that the last time he’d seen her they’d been fighting. Johnny put a hand on his shoulder and gave it a pat.

“She’s gonna pull through this Chucky. She’s tough. Before you know it she’ll be back to yelling at you for doing something dumb. You’ll see.” He smiled for the first time in almost a week, something Johnny had always been good at doing.

“You heading there later?”

“Yeah probably. My mom went to check on her this morning, and Carly is there now. My parents are heading out tomorrow and my mom wanted to check in before they left.”

“Tell you what. Go have dinner with your parents before they leave, and I’ll go sit with her for a little bit.”

“Johnny I-“

“Come on man. You haven’t seen them in months. I don’t mind.”

He was right, it had been months and it would be months. He had been so consumed with what had happened he hadn’t realized how fast the week had gone. He’d struggled to talk about it at first, but the more time she spent asleep the more things started to come out.

“This isn’t your fault Matthew.”

“Then why do I feel so bad.”

His dad sighed “Because you love her. But this should be a lesson, and when that girl wakes up you need to do everything in your power to fix this.”

He took those words to heart.

That had been 6 days ago, and there was no change since then. She’d taken a nasty blow to the head, which is where all of the blood came from, and no one really knew how long she’d been on the floor. He shivered at the memory.

“Well. Deal? I promise if anything changes I’ll call you.”

He hesitated before he nodded “Okay. Thanks. But if anything happens-“

“I promise I’ll call you first.”

*********

“ Excuse me Doctor?”

Hallie’s doctor turned and smiled at Carly.

“Yes?”

“I’m just wondering if there’s been any changes or anything? It’s been over a week now…” Carly stopped talking, lip trembling. The doctor nodded understandingly.

“This must be so hard on you all. I wish I had better news but her condition is the same. Good news is her vitals are strong, and it doesn’t appear the fall did too much damage but we’ll have to run some tests when she wakes up. Keep your head up.”

Cary nodded. This whole thing had been hard on her and Jay, and the guys in the team. But it had ravaged Matthew. It was now that Carly realized how much he really loved her. She had been so pissed at him when she slapped him, but the love they shared for Hallie had brought them back to being friends. She fired off a quick group text.

No changes.

Her phone rang a moment later. It was Matt.

“Hey. Uhm. Johnny is gonna sit with her for a bit tonight. My parents are leaving town tomorrow so I’m gonna have dinner with them.”

“I think that’s a great idea. You should spend some time with them before they head back to St.Louis. I’ll stay till he gets here.”

“Yeah….”

“Matty it’s okay. Spend time with your parents. That’s what Hallie would say.”

She heard a sniffle on the other end before he cleared his throat “Yeah your right. But she’d probably yell it at me.” And then he chuckled, for the first time in a week.

The sound warmed her heart.

“Alright I’m gonna head home. He should be there within the hour. Talk later. Bye Car.”

He hung up and Carly sighed. She picked up the folder sitting on the tray table in the hospital room and flipped it open. She absently read through the papers when something caught her eye.

*********

Johnny had busied himself with watching NHL network, social media surfing, and now was sitting in the chair trying not to look at her.

He had really come to love Hallie in the past few months and to see her pale, and hooked up to a bunch of machines…it was too much. It had been hard on the whole group, each for different reasons. He was startled from his thoughts however when Jay opened the door.

“Hey. What are you doing here?”

“I can’t sit in my apartment anymore. I figured I’d pop in and check on her. How’s she doing?”

“Same as last week as far as I know.”

“How’s Matt?”

Johnny shook his head “Not doing well. His parents are leaving town tomorrow so he’s at dinner with them now.”

“Good good. He needs to spend some time away from here. Carly said he’s been here every night.”

“This hit him really hard. We all-“

A soft breath that turned into a loud breath interrupted them. Goosebumps erupted across a Johnny’s skin as he watched Hallies eyes open once, twice, three times before they closed again.

“Doctor!” Jay yanked the door open and bolted down the hall calling for a doctor.

Hallie looked confused and the alarmed when she saw she wasn’t at home.

“Hey hey hey.” She turned to him eyes softening and tried to pick her head up “Don’t do that. Relax.”

“Where am I?” She closed her eyes again, wincing in pain.

“Your at the hospital. You hit your head. You’ve been out for a week.”

He could see she was struggling to put his words together in a way that made sense. The doctor and several nurses came in and ushered him and Jay from the room so she could speak with Hallie privately.

“I’m gonna call Chucky.”

*********

It had been nice to spend time with his parents. He found himself smiling and laughing a few times and the tension that had been settled in his bones for the last week wasn’t as heavy.

His phone rang at 6:45 pm as he and his parents were getting in the car to head home.

“Chucky. She’s awake.”

A rush of adrenaline surged through him and he quickly hung up before turning to his parents. He fumbled with his words for a few moments before his mom laid a hand on his arm.

“Calm down, what is it?”

“Hallie’s awake. I need-“ he turned this way and that looking for his keys.

“Matthew honey the keys are in your hand. Come on. We’re coming with you.”

**********

“How are you feeling? Doing okay?” The nurse asked leaning down to look Hallie in the eyes. She nodded and closed her eyes slowly.

“I’m just so tired.”

“That’s normal honey. You took a nasty spill we heard.”

She looked at Johnny, who nodded “It was.”

“Who brought me here?”

“The ambulance, but Chucky found you.”

She closed her eyes again. It was hazy, and some of it was completely gone, but she did remember feeling sick. After that it was a blank.

“That boy has been here every day and night.” The nurse said, one hand on her hip.

“What boy?”

“That cute one with the curls. If he’s not your boyfriend he definitely should be.” Johnny laughed and smiled “There will be no stopping him now.”

Carly arrived two seconds later, Noah in tow. They cried and they hugged and cried some more.

“Are you okay? I’m so sorry I wasn’t there-“

“It’s fine Car. I’m fine really.” Hallie had a raging headache and felt stiff all over. If she hasn’t been so exhausted she would have immediately asked for a shower but she wasn’t sure she would make it through one anyways. The nurse left, telling her she’d be back to check in her in an hour, and Carly turned to her. She looked awful, Jay too, like they hadn’t been sleeping.

“I’m so glad your okay babe.” Carly said sitting on the end of her bed. Noah was smiling encouragingly from his chair.

“We really have been so worried. All of us.”

Hallie smiled softly and closed her eyes “I love you guys.”

There was a large commotion at the door as Matthew came charging in the room stopping in the doorway. His eyes were huge, cheeks red like he’d ran up the stairs to get there. Hallie turned her head, took one look at him and big fat tears began to roll down her cheeks.

“Matty I’m so sorry.” She cried, reaching a hand out. She couldn’t move her neck and the tears burned her tired eyes but she was so overcome with emotion she couldn’t stop them.

“Sorry for what? I’m sorry. Don’t Hal. I’m just so glad your okay.” He fell into the chair next to her, and gripped her hand. Carly covered her mouth and swiped at a tear, and Chantal was holding her heart.

“Let’s give them some privacy.” Noah said ushering everyone from the room. He pulled her hand up to his mouth and kissed it.

“Are you okay?”

She nodded and let out a raspy breath before she spoke “What happened to me?”

“I don’t know. You went to lunch with my mom and then no one could get a hold of you. Do you remember?”

She shook her head “The whole day is kind of a blur. I just remember feeling sick.”

“Jay called me and said he was trying to call and you weren’t answering. So I came to check on you and found-“ he shook his head and took a deep breath “You must have passed out and hit your head. I found you in the bathroom.”

She reached up and gingerly touched the bandage on her head “I don’t remember anything.”

“It was awful, finding you that way. But what matters is your okay. You are okay right?”

“I think so. I’m tired, but I wanna see everyone.” She reached out to hold his hand “But before they come back. When I get out of here, can we fix all this?” She was crying again, but she was looking at him so hopefully he smiled.

“Yes Hal. We can fix everything. It’s gonna be fine I promise.” She nodded and closed her eyes with a small smile.

When their friends rejoined them, Keith and Chantal included, they filled in the blanks of her memory. The more they told her the more things started to come back.

“I’m just not sure what made me so sick.”

“When I got to your apartment, your door was unlocked. I thought maybe Ryan-“

“No. I think your right hook sent the message pretty clearly.”

They laughed before Chantal spoke “You seemed fine when I dropped you off, food poisoning maybe?”

“Maybe. The doctor said they were gonna do some more tests so maybe they can give me the answer.”

She made eye contact with Carly, who was giving her a strange look. She furrowed her eyebrows and Carly shrugged.

Weird.

Everyone filtered home after a while. Keith and Chantal would come see her on the way to the airport the next day, and Carly would be there in the afternoon while the guys had practice and tape review. She said goodnight to them.

“I’m gonna take my parents home and then I’ll come back.”

“Matty you look like you haven’t slept in a week. I’m okay here-“ but he was shaking his head.

“No way. Im coming back.” She smiled but rolled her eyes. His face lit up.

“There’s the Hallie I know. I’ll be back soon.”

She smiled and closed her eyes, and was sound asleep before they even made it down the hallway.

**********

Keith and Chantal’s morning visit had been so pleasant. Hallie had been up early and the morning nurse helped her take a shower and she felt so much better. They had invited her to St.Louis that summer, provided she could take time off work, and made her promise to keep in touch. They sent her well wishes from Brady and Taryn before they left, and then it was just her and Carly.

“Your doctor is on her way in here.”

“Your acting weird.”

Carly was looking at her strangely and they stared at each other for a minute before the doctor poked her head in the room.

“You look much better.” She had a Manila folder in her hand and she flipped it open “We have some answers as to what caused your fall. Did you want to discuss it now or-?” She looked between her and Carly before Hallie spoke.

“She can stay.”

The doctor nodded and shut the door before she sat down.

“Well for starters we are so glad that your okay. We’re still trying to figure out exactly what caused you to pass out, but after what I’ve heard I’m pretty positive in saying this is stress and alcohol related. In this instance the two didn’t mix. However we ran some blood work and it would appear that your pregnant.”

The words hit Hallie like a smack to the face. How? They’d been so careful, and had done everything to prevent it. But now everything started to make sense. The nausea, which she’d attributed to the Allie situation, the emotions, the fatigue. All of the signs had coincided with the drama of her relationship and she hadn’t thought in a million years she was pregnant.

But she was.

Carly reached over and grabbed her hand squeezing it.

“I’m- im pregnant? Are you sure?”

“Positive. Your blood work looks excellent and as far as I can see your 6 weeks into a healthy pregnancy. You’ll need to schedule an ultrasound before you go. I have some pamphlets here for you to take a look at, and some paperwork to review and sign. I have to ask, will the father be present? It’s important to discuss decisions together and be a United front during this time. Some women struggle more than others.”

“I don’t-“

“I’m assuming that boy that’s been living here the past few days is involved. Why don’t you take some time to digest all this and we can talk tomorrow. You’ve had a lot of info thrown at you. But I must tell you, in all the years I’ve worked here I’ve never seen someone have as much support as you. Your very lucky.”

Hallie smiled and squeezed Carly’s hand back “I am.”

The doctor left them and Carly turned to find her crying “Hal. Your gonna be a mom. Are you happy?”

Hallie nodded tearfully “I’m so scared Car. What if he isn’t happy?”

“Are you kidding? He’s gonna be ecstatic. Come here.” Carly situated herself on the bed and wrapped an arm around her shoulders “He loves you. So much. He’s gonna be so excited. You’ll see.”

**********

Hallie came home 4 days later, still tired and on strict bed rest but she was so glad to be home. There was flowers, and gift baskets and cards all over her counters.

“What is all this?”

“Some of from your neighbors, some from coworkers and some from the Calgary Flames.” He set her stuff down and turned to her “I think you should lay down for a while. Get some rest.”

“I’ve been laying down for a week. I just want to spend some time awake.” She was nervous. She hadn’t told him yet, but this was her moment. She’d had an ultrasound 2 days prior in the hospital and had hidden the pictures in her pocket in a white envelope.

“Where’s your instructions from your doctor? I want to read them.”

Now.

She pulled the envelope from her pocket and handed it to him. He was distracted as he opened it, mumbling stuff to himself as he eyed the meds on the counter making sure they were all there. But he frowned when he looked in the envelope.

“What is-?” He pulled them out and looked at them for several seconds and then at her and then back to the photos.

“Is this? Are you-?”

“I’m pregnant Matty.”

His face went from confused, to shocked, to happy, to the most excited she’d ever seen him.

“I’m- I’m gonna be a dad?” She nodded and swept at a tear coming from her eye. He pulled her in and hugged her tightly.

“Are you happy?” She asked against his neck.

“I’m happier than I’ve ever been. I love you Hal.”

“I love you too Matty.”

*********

“Gather round Gather round.”

It was one month later and the night before another Ottawa v Calgary game, in Calgary. The Tkachuks were in town with some family she hadn’t met yet, and they had arranged for everyone, his teammates, Brady and some players from Ottawa to meet for dinner and drinks. She, Matthew, Carly and now Jay were the only ones in on the secret. Matthew had decided now was the only time in the near future they would all be together so he was doing it now.

He was dinging a fork on the neck of his beer bottle trying to get everyone to pay attention but they only stopped talking when he very loudly said “Hey! Shut up!”

When they all quieted he cleared his throat “Thank you. Now first I just wanna say thanks everyone for coming, and thanks for all your support. You were all there for us, and we both really appreciate it.” He pulled Hallie closer and wrapped an arm around her shoulder. She smiled but looked confused.

“Which brings me to my second part of the evening.” He was smiling mischievously.

“Matty I-“

“Now relax Hal, I’m not gonna tell them your pregnant-“

A low hush went around the room and mouths fell open.

“I’m just gonna tell them that I’m gonna be a dad!”

Everyone immediately started screaming and crying. Keith and Chantal were elated to find out they were going to be grandparents, Carly was calling dibs on godmother and Brady and Taryn were already arguing over who was going to be a bigger bad influence.

Hallie rubbed her stomach absently, knowing that somewhere in there, there was a life that was just beginning. A little boy or girl, hopefully with Matthew’s curls and her big blue eyes. She smiled, feeling for the first time in her life truly at peace. She had made a life here, with beautiful people in a beautiful place. She finally got what she’d been chasing all these years. Matthew smiled at her from across the room. They would do this together, every step of the way, no matter what happened, no matter who tried to come between them.

Forever had only just begun.