#do you have my number?

[overcaffeinated-aro]

ok not to be that guy but like. labor rights and working class rights can coexist with 24h services and late amenities. its certainly hard to do so without worker exploitation in this political and social environment, it’s not a conflict likely to resolve overnight. but 24h services are important and especially valuable to those of us that are disabled or are on a different circadian rhythm. in fact more professional, health, and government services should be available or at least possible to work on asynchronously (if applicable) during late or odd hours, while workers also get sufficient pay for their labor and proper consistent scheduling. this would be much easier on the workers with night schedules if the entire professional world didn’t grind to a halt at 5pmEST

[chloesimaginationthings]

"They call it the MANGLE" - FNAF 2 phone guy

[littlefankingdom]

Bruce Wayne is canonically a very handsome man (he is called a "pretty boy" and he is in his 40s, for fuck's sake), and he is pretty famous as a rich philanthropist who doesn't want to leave his awful cursed crime infested city. So, there must be a ton of people thirsting over him on the internet. Fancams, edits, fanfics and imagines ("kidnapped with Bruce Wayne 😍 by a Gotham rogue"), the whole charade!

And anytime one of the batkids stumbles on a thirst post, they have the most dramatic disgusted reaction, loudly gagging, before sending the link to the batkids chat, because if they must suffer, then they should all suffer. Clicking on a link in this groupchat is like playing russian roulette, and getting rickrolled is a good ending.

[heartorbit]

figure skating set right now please. thanks

[calitsnow]

{Click for better quality}

And a little Dante’s bonus reaction to this mess:

[egophiliac]

time for skeleman

with the lack of any other info yet, all I can focus on are those Charles Lloyd-looking sunglasses. they are absolutely sending me. I feel like we're gonna fall through a tree or whatever and this stitched-up boney gentleman is gonna pop out from behind a gravestone and start serenading us with some smooth jazz on the saxophone.

or should I say...the saxoBONE???????

[astralleywright]

spent like an hour trying to find a post abt the disparity of origin companion's content in bg3 and couldn't so, hey, this fucking sucks

[radiance1]

The Justice League have a problem, one that needs some level of knowledge and expertise of a being from the Infinite Realms to give them a better chance of actually solving this problem.

However.

Every ghost they have summoned, without fail, took one look at Constantine. Squinted (yes, squinted). Then decided to go back to where they came without a word.

This. Would have been useful, nice even. If it was a situation where they needed the summoned being of a cult to head back to where they came without a fight.

But alas, that is not what is happening.

The Justice League, obviously, ask him why the ghosts keep fleeing back to their Realm at the sight of him, but Constantine can't answer because he genuinely has no idea why they keep leaving when getting a proper look at him.

So they keep trying and they do find some success in it. They summoned a boy, most likely older than he physically looks yet it still puts some of them off because of, well.

You know.

A boy with white hair and toxic green eyes. The boy stops short, as if not expecting to be randomly transported to somewhere else, takes a look around the room, then the Justice League. His eyes settle on one person.

Constantine, in particular.

He squints (Why do all of them squint? Nobody knows) and then a sudden looking of realization passes on his face. Different from the looks of vague fear and genuinely want to not involve themselves any further, his face held slight disgust and a heavy amount of disappointment.

Thankfully, he didn't leave immediately after that.

Constantine asks what's with the look on the ghost boy's face, the ghost boy in question squints even further. Stares at Constantine for a moment or two, buries his face in his hands and brings his knees to his hand and groans out.

"He could've done so much better."

[backtothestart02]

Do You Have My Number? - 4/5 | westallen fanfiction

A/N: I'm on a roll! Only one chap left. Enjoy!

...

Chapter 4 -

Silence stretched on for what felt like an eternity. Iris hadn’t been expecting him to actually pick up – obviously. Not after three rings of him not picking up. What had he been doing? Sleeping? Jacking off to some porn star on his phone?

She winced.

Okay, that last one was a little excessive maybe. And where was her jealousy cropping up from. He clearly wanted her, right? Wasn’t that the whole problem here? That they both wanted each other so badly they could hardly stand to be in the same room with each other and act professionally?

“Iris? Is that you?”

She cleared her throat a little too loudly, and knew there was nothing for it but to respond.

“Hi, Barry. Yes, it’s me.”

She heard a relieved sigh from his end and wanted to burst into tears. She was being ridiculous! Sue was right. She was acting like a horny teenager, and she needed to snap out of it. Pronto.

“Thank god. Did you get my message?”

“I got it,” she managed. “But there’s no need to apologize.”

“I think there is.”

“Well, whether there is or not, you’ve already done it, haven’t you?” She winced at the silence that snappy response induced. “That’s not what I…”

“No, you’re right,” he said softly, sounding dejected. “So, who do I come to see? Sue something or other?”

She swallowed.

“No. I’ll text you the property addresses, and you can meet me there. We’ll forego the office altogether. Do you have my number?”

“Your personal number? No, I, uh-”

“No, of course not. Because I don’t give out my personal number usually.” She licked her lips. “I’ll just tell you the addresses over the phone. Do you have a pen and paper handy?”

“No, I uh, just let me…” He began scrambling around in search of those two items. “Okay, I got- Wait a minute, does this mean you’ll be showing up? Not Sue?”

It took everything in her not to snap at him again, but she knew that wasn’t right. She had to have modes other than sass and arousal, especially around a client.

“That’s correct.”

“And we’re not going to talk about…?”

“There’s nothing to discuss,” she said firmly. “Now. The addresses. Are you ready for them?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

She rattled them off and ended the call, leaning back in her chair with a large exhale and accidentally rolling off the chair mat and up against the wall behind her.

A gentle knock on the door was followed by Sue opening it.

“So, I take it you’re keeping Barry Allen on your roster then?”

Iris groaned and closed her eyes.

“Shut up.”

“Thatta girl.”

Sue chuckled and closed the door on her way down the hall.

…

Barry arrived at the property first.

He really hoped he liked this property the best, so they wouldn’t even need to look at another one, and Iris wouldn’t be subjected to being in his presence a moment longer.

He couldn’t believe he’d screwed up this bad.

It was one thing if she didn’t return his attraction, but to not return it to the state that she wanted nothing to do with him even on a professional level and had gone through Cisco to try and achieve that was a lower blow than he’d ever dreamed of being on the receiving end of before.

One thing was for certain. He was not going to flirt. He was not going to come on to her. He was not going to check her out. She was going to be either another man or an ugly woman to him from this moment onward. He could forget any association with her beyond finding him an apartment, because he’d royally screwed up so bad that she probably wanted nothing to do with him in this life or the next.

He could only pray that she wouldn’t put out a bad word about him in the realtor community in case he ever needed to buy another apartment again. It was a minor dent compared to losing what they could’ve been, but it still would hurt his ego and self esteem and shame him a bit if finding another place became difficult as well.

The beeping sound of a car locking sounded in the distance, and he looked up. There was that little red bug, and there was Iris stepping out of it. She wore a dark plaid blazer today that he swore matched one of his button-down shirts he’d packed away just that morning. She also wore black dress pants instead of a skirt and some wedges. Her hair bounced over her shoulders in gorgeous natural curls. He found her even prettier than the last time he’d seen her, but something told him it would be a bad idea to tell her so, so he kept it to himself.

“Iris.”

She came to a stop and forced a polite smile.

“Barry.”

She gave him a once-over that he didn’t know what to do with and then gestured to the door.

“Shall we?”

“Mhmm.”

Pushing himself off the tan bricks of the building, he followed her inside. They got into the elevator just fine, and Barry told himself he was going to do everything in his power to avoid feeling whatever sexual tension he’d felt the other day. He didn’t so much as look at her while they were in the small area, especially not after they both reached for the button at the same time.

“S-sorry,” he managed.

“No, it was my bad,” she said, and he didn’t notice it then, but her voice wasn’t as clipped as it had been outside the building or on the phone for that matter.

“Here we are,” she announced a short while later when she pushed open the door to the apartment and allowed him to walk through.

Barry immediately deflated.

He hated it.

The color scheme was all wrong. There was no open concept. The ceilings weren’t even high. In fact, it looked a lot like his current apartment, except the things that he didn’t like about that apartment weren’t present. Which he supposed was an upside.

Still, he couldn’t help giving her a disappointed stare, which thankfully she took with a chuckle.

At least he wasn’t flirting.

“Give it a chance, Bartholomew,” she teased, patting his covered arm as she moved further into the apartment – and abruptly froze along with him.

“How did y-”

“Cisco let it slip last night on the phone. I promised him I wouldn’t tease you, but I guess I couldn’t help myself.”

“What else did he say?” he asked, his mood immediately lifting. Maybe things weren’t so bad after all if Cisco had gotten that casual with her.

That was when Iris took a step back though, remembering herself and what she’d promised.

“I really shouldn’t say. You should ask him. I’m sure he’ll tell you.”

“Like hell,” he muttered. “I asked him what happened, and he said you didn’t want me as a client anymore and that was that. I assumed it was something I did or said, because I thought that Cisco was implying that, but maybe I was wrong?”

She swallowed.

“We really should keep looking at the apartment. I know it doesn’t have some of the features you liked at the other properties or in my notes, but I really think you’ll like some of the aspects of the guest bedrooms and the master bedroom too, which has its own bathroom, and-”

“Screw the apartment,” he deadpanned. “What aren’t you telling me?”

“I’m trying to be professional right now, and you’re making it very difficult. Can we please carry on with the tour? Please?”

His eyes narrowed as he approached her, caught in the hallway with the walls so close to either side of them.

“Why?” he asked. “Why are you trying so hard to be professional? And why is it difficult for you? Why am I difficult for you? Just…” He slipped his hand into her curls and touched her cheek, deeply affected when she leaned into his palm. “Talk to me.”

“Because.” She swallowed, eyes closed. “I’m attracted to you,” she finally admitted aloud, then opened her eyes to his shocked face. “And I’m letting that attraction get in the way of my professionalism.”

“That’s why you didn’t want me as a client?” He gaped.

She nodded.

“Yes.”

He ran a hand through his hair and leaned back against the wall.

“Oh, my god, that’s such a relief. I thought I’d seriously offended you.” He chuckled lightly to himself. “But apparently, I just turned you on.”

His gaze shifted to hers again and got darker, seductive even. It sent shivers down her spine, and she swallowed, tensed up when he reached out for her again.

“Please…don’t.”

He dropped his hand.

“Not until we find you an apartment.”

He smirked, sensing victory.

“If you insist.”

She continued with the tour, and while he agreed that there were some aspects to like about this place, all he could think about was ravishing her on every distasteful corner of the place, so they agreed to go on to the last property on the list.

…

Iris was practically bursting at the seams by the time they got to the last location. She’d been honest with Barry and with herself, but at what cost? She’d have to make Barry swear he never told a soul, except maybe Cisco who already knew. The embarrassment it would cause her if word got out. Her reputation might be on the line. And all because he’d pushed her a little when she’d been horny to begin with.

“Here we are,” she said, stepping out of the last elevator for a while she hoped.

This apartment was different than the rest, and Barry for the first time ever was mesmerized with it first and seducing her second.

“It’s a loft,” she told him. “So, the kitchen, living room, partial bathroom, dining room are all down here, and a winding staircase takes you upstairs to a couple bedrooms, a master and a guest. There’s also a second guest bedroom on this floor, but you could turn it into whatever you want, office, study, gym, you name it.”

“It’s that big?” he asked.

“See for yourself.”

She gestured to the white door on the far side of the room and followed his slowly as he made a beeline for it. Then she leaned against the doorframe as he inspected the room.

“Yeah, it’s a good size. I like it.”

She smiled and stepped back as he exited the room.

“And I love the high ceilings and floor-to-ceiling windows. No fans, which is a plus. Open concept. Yeah, this is great. Let’s check out the upstairs.”

He took the steps two at a time till he got to the top. She was much slower in her heels, but she made it to the top too. Not before she heard him exclaiming “Wow!” when he got into the master bedroom however.

She laughed aloud, joining him shortly.

“It’s huge, right?”

“Massive!” he cried, now inside the master bathroom. “This bath is incredible too, and it’s separate from the shower that looks like it’ll come down like a waterfall.”

She giggled.

“Test it out. It does.”

He turned on the water and then stepped back to watch it fall down from four different directions and with good water pressure too.

“I think I might be in heaven,” he declared. “Too bad I’m not naked.”

She cleared her throat.

“Sorry.”

She shook her head, dismissing it.

“No need. I’m glad you like it. Now…for price.”

“It’s over budget, isn’t it? I knew I shouldn’t get my hopes up.”

“It’s exactly one thousand under budget.”

“No way. For real?”

“For real.”

He shut off the water and then came to her, picking her up and spinning her around before setting her back on her feet.

She could see it in his eyes. He wanted to kiss her. And in that moment, she would have let him. But something inside him must’ve told him the timing wasn’t right, so he spurted out some words instead and let that be enough.

“I’ll take it.”

[ricky-mortis]

I heard that Corey Dorris sang Show Stopping Number at Innit- so I present: Corey!Hidgens

[r-aindr0p]

Magic jail for the first years

[the-muppet-joker]

How are you?

I am doing the best I can given the circumstances! (Horse dead, scammed thousands, got bald)

[hauntingrabbits]

Batman my little pony AU. Part 2 here, Part 3 here

More info on these under the cut!

1. Sundown Mane/Batpony (Bruce Wayne)

His backstory & general situation is pretty much identical to every other batman out there so I wont get into it.

Other notes:

-His cutie mark is a masquerade mask that I tried to make vaguely bat-shaped. The general public sees his Cutie Mark through the lense of his reputation, and he leans into it heavily to obscure the truth. In interviews, he presents it as being tied to hosting galas (it’s the reason he started hosting those huge masquerade balls in the first place) and/or his fashionable looks, but in truth it’s far more representative of his stealth and disguise capabilities, as well as his masked night time hobbies as a whole.

-He’s not an actual bat-pony in any way, the bat wing appearance is just the costume (intentionally designed that way for intimidation, battle, and obscuring his identity further). Though most citizens assume he’s a true bat-pony, other rumors range from him being a vampire, to an Earth pony with false tech-based wings, to a magically disguised alicorn, to a spirit of the night.

-If Batman were actually to be a pony I think he’d 100% be an earth pony, because his big thing is relying on skill and tech rather than power and he has the whole “normal guy amongst gods” thing going on. HOWEVER. There are actual bat ponies in this show. How am I not supposed to utilize that somehow for the guy whose name is BATMAN? Also with Sundown I think being a Pegasus just fits the playboy personality front he puts up. I don’t know why, its just vibes.

-I think he just doesn’t fly much while patrolling as batpony, instead using his wings for extra jump or for intimidation and cover like with his cape. They’re probably steel-tipped or something too. He doesn’t rely on flight for advantage and trains entirely grounded because he doesn’t want to be dependent on flight and find himself lost if his wings are ever incapacitated.

2. Apollo Honeyscales/Two-Face (Harvey Dent)

Fascinated by the Equestrian legal system and craving a more organized society than what was offered by his generally disorderly and solitary fellow Chimeras, Apollo moved to Gotham to pursue higher education. Unfortunately, ponies are often intimidated by, if not downright terrified of Chimeras, so though Chimera cultures usually give each head equal social weight and three individual names, Apollo quickly adapted to instead try to present himself as pony-like as possible. He used a singular name and pronoun for his whole body, presented the less intimidating, herbivorous-looking goat as his “main” head, and eventually even took to having a faux Cutie Mark applied for media and court appearances. Prior to the attack, the lion and the snake head were never seen talking in public, and even in private the only ponies to have heard them speak were his close friends Sundown Mane and Glider Gold.

After being attacked with acid in court, Scales succumbed to injury and had to be amputated, while Honeybite was left alive but severely scarred. With this event, Apollo’s and Honeybite’s already fragile mental states from years of pony society othering them, the weight of their job, and personal repression finally snapped in their grief and anger, leading Honeybite to fully take the reins and create the criminal persona of Two-Face. Attempts from both Sundown and Glider and to reach out since have been unsuccessful.

Other Notes:

-According to the wiki only one chimera shows up in the whole show so. I made stuff up. -Chimeras typically being solitary is based on the fact we only ever see one in the show. This solitary nature would make it hard for them to have a widespread legal system at all, let alone to enforce it; thus Apollo’s original fascination with the foreign pony legal system. The Chimera in the show also has individual names for each head, each with a slightly different style (the goat following pony name conventions with the name Pumpkin Cake, the tiger following a slightly more violent version of pony name conventions with the name Sweetkill, and the Snake bluntly just being named Snakey). I tried to follow similar conventions for Apollo. I was most happy with the name Scales, because it followed the blunt snake naming convention while also sort of doubling as a scales of justice reference. Apollo is just a reference to Harvey’s nickname in some of the comics, and Honeybite is just for fun.

-His perfectly split coat is unique even among other chimeras, and as Apollo he was generally considered attractive and “exotic” by Equestrian media outlets.

-The temporary Cutie Mark application was done professionally. (Surely ponies have perfected this art, right? Like this has to be something pony society does and has services for, right? Ponies covering up embarrassing Cutie Marks, blank flanks covering up an embarrassing lack of a Curie Mark, Ponies getting Cutie Marks done for costumes, theater, movies, etc… you get it.) Apollo’s choice of a faux Cutie Mark is meant to serve as both a way of further integrating himself into pony society and a proclamation of his legal skills.

-Apollo was a genuinely great lawyer. Ponies on defense were often so preoccupied at the terror of having a lion and a snake silently stare them down that they wouldn’t realize it was actually the goat they should’ve really been afraid of until their entire case had already been ruthlessly torn to shreds.

3. Glider Gold (Gilda Gold)

Even prior to their relationship and subsequent engagement, Glider had long been Apollo’s closest friend and confidant. She saw the way his job and keeping up his image was tearing him apart long before the acid attack, and she deeply regrets not trying harder to get him the help he needed before it was too late. Multiple news outlets have been trying to get an interview with her and their efforts only increase every time Two-Face shows up in the news (despite Sundown’s efforts to dissuade them). She hasn’t been the same since the attack and Apollo’s disappearance, losing interest in her work and finding her friendship with Sundown heavily strained as they both feel the weight of Apollo’s absence.

Other notes:

-I wasn’t even going to draw Gilda originally because she’s such a minor character in Batman stuff but as I was writing out Apollo’s background she nudged her way back in. I like her too much.

-This version is based on her very first iteration where she was a sculptor. Her green coat is a reference to that version’s accompanying Two-Face (also his first iteration), who had green scarring.

- The choice for her to be a pegasus was mainly just to go with her silly name, but I do think being a pegasus would be beneficial to a sculptor. No ladder required to work on high details just fly up there.

-I am not immune to the bruce/harvey/gilda agenda

[weirdglassthing]

ouaw doodle dump!!

[ajwahoocrowley]