#do you guys think that Jean would still have distracted Riko if he knew Kevin was going to leave?

[constelationprize]

Thinking many many thoughts about how Jean was Riko's partner for a YEAR and was still rooming with Goon #3. Because that was how unwilling Riko was to let go of Kevin. And how that implies that Jean was placed as his partner both because of the practicality of Kevin being gone AND as a punishment for letting him go in the first place. Being partners with Jean could actually slow Riko down depending on how often he's hurt (because I don't think Riko was all that exempt from the rules to the point where his partner's performance would completely not matter) and he was still placed there. Riko was just THAT angry at him over Kevin's escape. And all the while he was keeping Kevin's side of room like an altar, even back when he didn't even think Kevin could PLAY, because of an injury he caused.

[thisisnotourlasthunt]

Andrew Showing The Foxes His Love Through Actions.

All through “All for the game” we can see how Andrew shows his love through actions. I believe that Andrew does care for his teammates and I know I; m not the only one, so I wrote this. (Also, I will just forget about the choking scene because N*ra did their relationship so badly, like- ugh, that’s for another time)

Tw: Curse words, references to the foxes pasts, punches, vomit, Riko, mentions of scars, mentions of nightmares, mentions of panic attacks, mentions of past self-harm, probably many spelling and grammar mistakes.

Allison.

It happened during a game, the foxes were winning and the other team were getting exasperated because they could not get past the backliners and if they could, Andrew would not let them score.

During the last minutes of the game, a player from the other team made Allison trip on purpose and “accidentally” kicked her.

Everyone else were too far away from them.

Except Andrew.

When the referee called the fault, Andrew was already there, punching the guy resulting in him taking a step back and falling to the ground.

As the referee gave him a yellow card, Andrew extended his arm to help Allison up.

And if he asked Renee how bad the injury was, no one had to know. 

Matt.  

When Matt was visiting his mom during summer vacations, they decided to go shopping, there he found the most adorable hoodies. It was orange on the outside and the inside had a really soft and warm fabric, which was white and had orange paw prints. But the best part was that the hoodie had fox ears.

Matt obviously bought nine of them.

“Disgusting.” Andrew had said, which Matt had obviously expected, so he thought nothing of it.

Everyone wore them, Aaron had given his to Katelyn, except Andrew.

But when winter came, Matt saw Andrew get out of his dorm room with the hoodie on, pulling it tighter against himself when a cold air blast came.

“Not a word.” Andrew deadpanned, pointing at Matt, when he noticed him, before leaving the tower.

Matt smiled the whole day.

Dan.

During one of their dinner bankets, the foxes were placed into pairs and told to socialize with the other teams. The pairs were meticulously design so that ‘the monsters’ (minus Nicky) interacted. This meant every ‘monster’ was placed with an upperclassmen. Andrew got Dan.

So when they Dan were talking to some players from Penn State, the Ravens decided to join.

They began talking sh¡t about Dan’s time as a stripper.

Andrew didn’t say or do a thing, knowing Dan was capable on fighting her own fights, she is the first female captain on Exy, but he does stand to the side, throwing a death glare to them.

But when one of them decide it’s a good idea to slap her in the butt when she is distracted....Andrew intervienes.

He grabs the Raven’s wrist, twisting it before pushing him into a table.

Dan is surprised, to say the least, but she knows that the Raven will get a worst fate if she leaves Andrew like that. 

Calmly, she tells him she is okay and that the Raven didn’t touch her and that he can look and see for himself.

The latter does the trick, Andrew turns his murderous glare at Dan so she turns in place extending her arms showing him that the Raven did nothing to her.

Andrew calms after a while and stands up, glancing at the Raven one more time. 

The rest of the night Andrew does not leave Dan’s side until they head back home. Dan attaches herself to that memory forever. 

Renee.

Renee and Andrew sparred at least once a week, more whenever Andrew was having a bad day.

Such as that moment, Aaron’s trial was just around the corner and Andrew was not having it.

He went to Bee’s twice but it still wasn’t enough, so him and Renee spared.

But today was a specially not good day, Aaron’s lawyer had said that he’d have to speak about what happened that day.

Renee knew that Andrew was far more on his head than n the present so she wasn’t mad when Andrew threw her down to the mat and her hip bumped onto the floor.

For the first time since they spared that day, Renee saw Andrew actually see her.

His eyes were wide, probably surprised of what happened so she reassured him that she was okay and that it didn't hurt much and that she’d had much worse before.

But he didn’t listen to her and got off the mat.

Renee stood up and went for her water bottle, thinking that Andrew had gone to let out some steam alone.

But then he came back with an ice package in hand and gave it to her.

Renee thank him, placed it on her hip and sat near him while he starred to the distance in moral support.

Nicky.

Nicky wasn’t one to get sick often, but when it happened, he really got sick.

So when one day he wakes up with a headache and all of his bones ache, he knows he’s in trouble.

Not wanting anyone to be worried about him, Nicky tries to stand up, just for a blast of nausea hits him and he has to run to the bathroom before he pukes on their bedroom.

When he is done throwing his guts out, he brushes his teeth and walks out to the kitchen for a glass of water. But when he gets there, a water bottle is out with a bottle of Pepto-bismol beside it. 

In the middle of his confusion, Andrew and Aaron appear with a thermometer, a blanket and pills.

“Go lay down,” Andrew says with an uncharacteristically softness in his tone.

Nicky complies and walks towards the couch, Andrew protectively trailing behind him with his phone and a blanket.

“I don’t have any class today, Aaron has two in an hour but then he’ll be back. Tea?” Nicky is perplexed at this attention given by his cousins so he is only able to nod and think who were these people and what did they do with his cousins.

The rest of the day, the twins (mostly Andrew) take his temperature, give him his meds, cook for him and help him out whenever he needs it.

Nicky sleeps with a smile that day.

The next day, he feels much better, but because the sickness messed with his feelings, he has an urge to hug his cousins.

He asks for permission and surprisingly, Andrew says yes.

Nicky keeps the hug fast and makes sure he doesn’t make Andrew feel trapped.

He still cries at the memory. 

Aaron.

Out of all the foxes, Aaron is the one with the most difficult things to study. He is in fact studying pre-med.

So during the finals week, he is the most stressed.

There is this one class in which Aaron has been having the most trouble with and if he doesn’t pass the test, he’ll have to repeat the class. So to say that he was stressed was an understatement.

He begins studying for that class a week and a half before the exam is and the day before the exam, he skips gym, morning practice and afternoon practice.

He studies for the exam the whole day and had to be reminded to take breaks for the bathroom and meals constantly.

He is also forced by Andrew to sleep when he woke up at 3 am and Aaron was still awake, studying.

Aaron keeps thinking of the material as he tries to sleep, and isn’t able to until 4 am, he dreams on the material the whole night.

When he opens his eyes, he sees that the sun is much higher than usual, worried, he checks the time on his phone just for his fears to be true, his alarm didn’t sound and he slept through the whole exam.

He doesn’t even care to change and runs to the building. The door to his classroom is closed and the professor is not there.

“Can’t stop thinking about the exam? Me neither.” He hears one of his classmates say behind him.

“I didn’t even do it.” He says through his teeth.

“What do you mean? I saw you there.”

Aaron is confused so he asks more classmates if they saw him, and all of them said that yes, they saw him there.

Hurriedly he got to the tower and confronted Andrew if it was his doing and if he did the exam for him like they did in high school.

“I did.” was Andrew’s only response before walking out.

Aaron got a B⁺ a grade much better than if he had done it by himself.

Kevin.

After Riko died, his and Andrew’s deal could be done, but they had grown close, they had passed so much time together since Kevin escaped Evermore.

Neither of them would say it out loud, but they were each other’s best friend.

So when Kevin learned that his things would be thrown away from the Nest, he went into a spiral.

But when Andrew asked and Kevin couldn’t say why, Andrew made it his mission to know.

Neil had a few assumptions, but when he had been at the Nest, he had been too focused on his injuries that he wasn’t a good resource.

So Andrew contacted someone he never thought he would be speaking to. Jean.

Jean told Andrew of Kevin’s old bedroom and the things Kevin had to hide away from Riko because if he found them, Kevin would be punished. Yet he didn’t know what these secret things were. 

Thankfully, Jean knew where the hiding spot was.

The next day, Andrew took the Maserati in the early morning without a word (Neil knew but he had to act as if he didn’t), and made his way to Evermore.

Once there, he had to sneak inside, but given that the Nest was desolated for classes it was easy.

When Andrew got to where Jean had told him where the hiding spot was, he found a small shoe box.

Opening it, he found three things and Andrew immediately understood Kevin’s spiraling.

When he got back to the tower, he directly went to his dorm. Inside were Neil, Nicky and Kevin watching a game.

Andrew signaled Neil and the latter made Nicky follow him out.

“Where were you? You missed morning practice,” Kevin said as soon as they were alone.

Without a word, Andrew took the shoebox out of his bag and carefully gave it to Kevin, who took a shaky breath at the sight of it.

As soon as it was in Kevin’s hands, he opened it and carefully took the three things which were the last things he had from his mother.

A woman’s ring, a record player and a photograph. 

Tears immediately sprang from Kevin’s eyes and Andrew decided he would give Kevin his space.

“Thank you,” Kevin said as he opened the door, Andrew just nodded feeling a weird warmness in his chest.

Neil.

Andrew shows Neil his love in so many ways, helping him out during panic attacks, reminding him that he’s safe, holding his hand, kissing him, sharing a cigarette in the roof, stroking his hair when they cuddle and so much more.

But the most important thing Andrew does for Neil is letting the latter see his vulnerability and trust him with it.

It starts with simple things, Andrew letting Neil sleep with him in the same bed, cuddle together, sit on Andrew’s lap (and vice versa), etc.

But it slowly begins to increase, let Neil stay whenever he gets a nightmare and/or a panic attack, let Neil take care of him when he gets sick, let Neil cuddle on top of Andrew, let himself seek comfort in Neil, Andrew letting Neil take his armbands off, see and touch them.

It takes a long time, but Neil doesn’t mind, those little things are more than enough for him and he doesn’t expect more from Andrew, but welcomes this little things and holds onto them with all of him.

Bonus:

Wymack. 

Wymack is always threatening his foxes with running marathons and says that their personal stuff is over his pay rate, but oh doesn’t he care for them.

He works hard for them so they can have good things and safe and comfortable area for them, that’s why he had the walls on the showers made.

He loves the foxes, and they love them too.

One morning, he had to organize some piles of paperwork, but he had a stressing week and the night before he hadn’t been able to sleep good, so after a while of organizing paperwork, he decides he deserves a break.

The foxes are supposed to be in class so he doesn’t expect them until the afternoon. He goes to the lounge and lays down on the couch to “rest his eyes”.

He falls asleep almost instantly.

Andrew had forgotten something on the court after their morning practice so he decided to go now, he had finished his classes and knew that Wymack had to organize some paperwork, he was surprised to see the old man asleep.

Andrew could remember his initial fear of the man when he saw him the first time, he was tall, broad and serious, but he didn’t let it show. He had been waiting for the man to do something to him, but instead the man had respected his boundaries and didn’t ask when Andrew broke into his home in the late night and made himself a pot of hot cocoa (which had been bought for this reason).

So quietly, Andrew went to Wymack’s office and organized his paperwork, marking those who were missing one or two things with a post it and leaving right after he was done, not expecting the man to know it was him.

When Wymack woke up and walked back to his office he was surprised to see that his paperwork was organized. He mentally questioned who it was but when he read the post its he immediately knew it was Andrew, he knew all of his children’s handwritings, and made sure he bought Andrew’s favorite  chocolate ice cream.

Abby. 

Abby was the first one, apart from Bee, to see his scars. 

The first time she had tried to say something but she had seen something in his face because he didn’t and let him place the armbands back on.

After that she looked away when he took them off and just glanced at them for a second to make sure there were no track marks before turning around again so he could put the armbands back on.

(She knew there would not be track marks, so she just looked at them so there would be no new ones, he cared for her foxes.)

And during the physical exam, she made sure not to touch him more than necessary. 

Abby checks on Bee asking if he’s okay, she never expects an in depth answer, just a confirmation and she feels relief when Bee tells her that he is getting better.

On one of his sessions with Bee, she suggests Andrew that he should tell someone about his scars, preferably someone who has already seen them. 

Andrew knows what Bee is trying and Bee knows that Andrew knows and Andrew knows Bee knows that Andrew knows.

In the end, he does tell Abby. He keeps it vague and watches her reaction, waiting for a small expression change, but thankfully Abby just listens, and shows no pity, knowing that Andrew would hate it and does not comment.

When he’s done, she just nods and thanks him for telling her and when Andrew leaves, Abby lets the tears she had retained out.

She keeps the truth guarded with her life, glad Andrew trust her enough to say this.

Bee.

It is not a secret that Andrew sees Bee like his mother figure, out of all the woman in his life she was the only one that he didn’t feel the need to be unlike himself, she loved him just the way he was.

It was scary at first, his mind supplied that it would be just like Cass, he just had to wait for the other shoe to come down.

It never did.

So he found himself driving to her office when he needed to understand something or he was just not in a good mental place.

He would also call her when he didn’t have the energy to move.

She was on one of his sides during Aarons trial, helping him keep his cool when he felt like he needed to punch something.

When it had been his turn to say his testimony, he had looked at her and Neil, remembering that they would be with him and that they would show no pity to him.

So the day before Mother’s day, when him and Neil were shopping for clothes, and he saw a coffee mug in the shape of a bee hive that read “To the Bee-st mom” he had to buy it.

The next day he arrives to her office and leaves the cup before leaving without a word.

It fills Bee’s heart when she reads it but knows best than to comment of it on their next session.

But if she uses it everyday and it becomes her favorite mug, no one has to know.

Look at me posting three days in a row, I’m proud of myself ngl. Anyways, have this, hope you like it, I tried my best and this is honestly the longest “headcanon” I’ve ever written.

[kevindayscrown]

The one where Kevin Day falls in love with an ice hockey player.

Part 8

Windows

(TW: Mentions of Riko and conditions in the Nest, slight angst)

Anything included in this head canon takes place the semester after the Foxes won the championship against the Ravens.

Disclaimer: I know next to nothing about varsity teams in the United States so excuse any false information. Head over to the directory to find the previous parts.

Eric claimed he knew where to take Kevin. He said that he’d make up for the lack of privacy on the public rink, and Kevin let him drive them away. He was surprised when Eric parked outside of an old building. It still looked well preserved.

“This is sort of a hideout for the frats mostly,” Eric explained as he led Kevin inside. “It was found abandoned and they usually use it to throw parties. We got lucky that today is not one of those days.”

Kevin raised an eyebrow as he looked around. At least here, they were away from prying eyes and away from Andrew. He didn’t let himself think for too long that the only reason they were doing this pretend dating was that so people would watch them. Technically, neither of them had to agree to coming here.

He found a couch pushed back against the wall but before he could sit on it, Eric stopped him by standing in front of him.

“Not here. Come on.” He headed up the stairs. Kevin hesitated, and would have been suspicious if he hadn’t known that there was no way Eric hadn’t registered and taken Andrew’s threat seriously.

And so, he followed.

Kevin had doubts when he realized their new spot was in the attic.

But upon laying eyes on the mostly empty space, he halted.

It was small and yet big enough for just the two of them. There was a large window across from them, higher up, and when Kevin walked closer, he noticed that the only view through it was of the sky.

Eric sat down and pressed his palms down on the floor to lean on them, staring up at the window. Kevin hesitated before sitting down next to him.

“Sometimes, we come here with the guys from the team when we need a break, you know?” Eric started. Kevin scoffed as he kept his gaze outside of the window.

“So, you brought me on the same place you bring your teammates?” Kevin had loosened enough that Eric could tell he was teasing.

“Mm well, I figured we’d have some peace and quiet.”

And so, in silence they remained for a few minutes. The window was slightly ajar, so Kevin could listen to the sounds of the busy campus outside.

“Today was fun,” Eric said.

Kevin nodded slowly and brought one knee close to his body, hugging it.

“I suppose it was.”

Kevin could remember the feeling of Erik’s hand closing around his, the feeling of his breath against his skin, the goaltender’s laughter echoing even over the laughter of the children in the rink.

But he could also remember Riko. Riko and Tetsuji and their words. A good player was just that; a player dedicated to playing the game. Anything else did not matter. Especially things that could get in the way. Distractions.

Ravens did not care who they slept with in the nest. Gender did not matter, as long as they took what they wanted; meaningless sex. Riko however, would always tell Kevin that homosexuality was disgusting. It had no place in a world that belonged predominantly to men.

Kevin then remembered Jean’s screams and pleads.

He almost flinched, but Eric chose that moment to speak:

“You are always doing this.”

“Doing what?” Kevin asked, not looking at him.

“Get lost. In whatever it is that’s going on in there.”

Kevin didn’t respond.

“I know you’ve been through shit. I don’t know what that shit is exactly, but I’ve seen you face your demons. What’s holding you back now?”

Kevin had faced Riko. In the end, he’d won. But had he really?

“I’m tired.”

Was it the adrenaline from today’s excitement or the exhaustion itself that made Kevin say that? He wasn’t sure. All he knew was that he was tired of carrying this weight. Riko’s ghost, memories from the Nest, guilt, his mother’s legacy, people’s expectations.

Was Kevin a person or was he a figure? A shadow of his mother’s decisions, an echo of her life? Someone that people looked up to who wasn’t even real.

Eric’s expression softened, but Kevin didn’t want his pity.

“I understand. I didn’t use to, but now I see it.”

Kevin attention was drawn by his words so he finally turned to look at him.

“You are too hard on yourself. You are cold and harsh with others, but only because you are so used to having high expectations from yourself, that you can’t help doing the same with everyone else.”

Kevin didn’t respond.

He wondered how he was so transparent when it came to Eric.

“And you?” He finally said. Eric raised an eyebrow, waiting for further explanation.

“Me?”

“Yes. You. You always have something to say, you are so calm and so fucking confident. What’s the catch?”

Eric hesitated and then shrugged.

“We all have our own weights. The question is whether you’ll allow someone to help you carry them. I have friends. A family who supports me. They help me through it. Who do you have?”

Kevin scoffed.

“You and your wise sayings,” he muttered. He would have looked away but Eric didn’t let him. He held onto Kevin’s chin and made him keep his gaze on him.

“If I am to pretend to be your boyfriend, I ought to understand you, don’t you think?” He asked.

Kevin had nowhere else to stare at but at Eric.

Eric noticed then, that Kevin had small tiny freckles sprawled all over his cheeks. They were tiny and almost invisible, but they were there.

“I suppose you are right.” Kevin said.

The thought of Eric ‘understanding’ him, terrified Kevin, though he didn’t show it. Opening up to someone, letting everything out. He’d never done it before. With anyone.

Their faces were dangerously close.

Kevin wasn’t sure why he didn’t pull away.

“You know, to sell the lie, we will probably have to kiss in public,” Eric’s voice was now a whisper.

Kevin froze at that moment, but all it took for him to relax was a brush of Eric’s thumb across his skin.

“We need practice. You know, so that it won’t shock you when we finally have to do it.”

It was a stupid excuse, but both of them used it to appease to their doubts and self-instilled restrictions, worries and no’s.

“Yes. You are probably right.”

Practice. This was a game. Nothing more.

And yet, as Eric pressed his lips against Kevin’s, Kevin felt a rush feeling of excitement, similar to scoring on court, his heart pounding.

His eyes closed and he leaned closer. Even kissing was like a banter, a competition between them. They enjoyed riling each other up, drawing reactions out of the other, pushing each other to their limits.

It became frantic, rough. Kevin’s hands gripped Eric’s shoulders and Eric’s hands went to his waist. They pulled each other closer and only pulled away when they had to catch their breath.

Kevin let go and panted slightly. Eric was the one who put distance between them and they remained silent for a moment.

It wasn’t awkward. But it was clear both of them had a lot to think about, for different reasons.

“Perhaps we need more practice,” Kevin muttered. Doubts and denial would come later. At the moment, Kevin was too focused on Eric, as the goaltender leaned in again and stole his breath away.

[nekojitachan]

Hmm. So... the last week or two (two?) have been... interesting. Work go kablewy (that a word?) because of... things... (nothing bad for me, just... things... life is strange), head has been very owwiie, and have had some not very good days, to be honest.

But getting a lot of writing done! Including this - another part of the Raven!Andrew soulmate story that doesn’t exist.

Uhm, past sexual abuse is referenced, Nathaniel/Neil’s past is vaguely referenced/hinted at, Andrew’s past is vaguely referenced. Think that’s it for the warnings. Oh, and Andrew’s violent thoughts.

I should come up with a title for this at some point.

Oh, and rest of the story can be found here.

*******

Andrew stared at the visage on his laptop’s screen; the smile on Nathan Wesninski’s face was slightly smug as if he knew a secret that he wasn’t willing to share, his glacier blue eyes devoid of emotion. According to various internet searches, Nathan was a self-made man who owned several businesses in and around Baltimore, who gave regularly to charity, and had a wife and a son.

He also had persistent rumors of being connected to some unsavory individuals, but nothing that could be substantiated. Most people put it down to simple jealously – Wesninski was a man who’d built his own fortune, married his soulmate and had a talented son. People loved to find something wrong with a man so ‘blessed’.

Except he was somehow tied to the Moriyamas, whom Andrew was slowly learning weren’t entirely on the up and up, his lovely soulmate had a dead look in her eyes which Andrew knew all too well, and his son bore multiple scars, had a strong distrust of soulmates and was being treated as chattel.

‘Blessed’ wasn’t the first word which came to Andrew’s mind when he thought of Nathan Wesninski.

He closed the browser and forced himself to work on his class assignments; university wasn’t much of a challenge, but one of Tetsuji’s assistants checked to make sure he (and the rest of the Ravens) turned in their work and that they weren’t failing any classes.

There was almost half an hour of ‘study time’ left when he finished with assignments for the day (for the rest of the week, actually); he got up from his desk, which made Ben look at him. “You done already?” his partner asked, tone a bit envious.

Andrew nodded as he headed toward the door; Ben appeared surprised that he’d received some sort of answer and turned back to his statistics book with a slight smile.

There weren’t many people wandering about the Nest at that time since the players usually took advantage of any break they were given, so Andrew wasn’t surprised to not run into anyone along the way to the Black Hall nor to find Riko and Kevin all snug in their room. Kevin opened the door when he banged on it, expression confused when he saw Andrew smiling out in the hallway.

“Uhm, is everything all right?”

“I came to chat,” Andrew said as he shoved his way inside. “Not with you, #2.” He ignored Kevin calling him an asshole and strode toward Riko, who was reading an economics textbook. “With the man who can make things happen.” Or so the prick liked to think.

“Hmm, now that sounds interesting,” Riko drawled as he set the book aside and sat up straight. “What does white trash like you want? An early taste of Nathaniel?” He tsk’ed while waving his right index finger about as if chastising a naughty child. “Not until you live up to your end of the bargain on Friday.”

Andrew had to focus on Aaron, on keeping his brother safe, to prevent himself from bashing the bastard’s head in with the book on the bed. “It’s about the game on Friday,” he said as his grin widened, as he thought about using his racquet to eviscerate Riko and a good bit of his own team. “I want you to turn a blind eye to something for me during it.”

It was Riko’s turn to appear confused as he studied Andrew. “What? The refs can’t ignore you pulling something stupid out on court.”

“Not them.” Andrew reached into the right pocket of his track pants to pull out the bottle of his detested pills. “I’m going to play unmedicated,” he said as he gave the bottle a shake.

“That doesn’t sound like a good-“

“Why?” Riko asked as he cut off Kevin’s protest, his gaze intent on Andrew.

Andrew’s lips twitched even wider as he rattled the bottle some more. “Because it’ll make me play better, make me fight harder to win.” Because he wanted a few hours where he could feel his own emotions without the manic taint of the damn drugs, could be free of them, even if it was on an Exy court.

An Exy court with his soulmate nearby.

Riko studied him for a few seconds then grinned. “I’ll be disappointed if Rutgers scores a single point in the second half on Friday,” he said before he laid back down on his bed.

And Andrew would be disappointed if the prick didn’t get his throat crushed by a racquet to the neck during the game, but one couldn’t have everything, could they?

Taking that as a sign of both approval and dismissal, Andrew turned around to leave without saying another word. While he was in the Black Hall, he stopped by the break room there and snagged the good granola bars (chocolate chips) and a few energy drinks.

Moreau was back to full practice that day, but Andrew didn’t get a chance to talk to him; the backliner was never far from Nathaniel’s side, lately. Andrew suspected that last Friday night had something to do with it, especially when he was given virulent looks by the French bastard. He’d be offended by the obvious dislike, but he didn’t give a damn what Jean Moreau thought about him.

He didn’t give a damn about much, and wished he could include a certain redheaded backliner in that statement as well.

Still, while he spent too much effort studying the Scarlet Knights’ statistics and past games (any effort was too much), he noticed that the bruises on Nathaniel’s too pretty face were fading and that the rest of the Ravens (except Moreau) were giving the young backliner adequate space.

Hmm, it seemed that no one wanted to end up like Lev Federov.

Andrew also noticed the narrow looks Nathaniel cast his way from time to time, as if his soulmate was trying to figure him out. Every now and then he would grin widely at Nathaniel, which would make the redhead mutter something in French and stomp away with his dour shadow trailing along. There would be a pain, sharp and deep, inside of Andrew’s chest as he watched them leave together, until he reminded himself that Nathaniel was his soulmate, not Moreau’s.

Then he’d be so disgusted with himself he’d stalk off to the exercise room so he could hit a punching bag until the urge to destroy something finally eased.

Friday arrived, and Andrew made a game out of thinking up a different ways to kill everyone he saw wearing a #1 Ravens jersey as he went to his classes; he considered it a worthwhile mental exercise. He was distracted from imaging the guy in front of him two rows down in Biology class being slowly whittled away by razor sharp vegetable peelers when Aaron interrupted him by dropping into the seat next to him.

“Hey, real quick, hope you win tonight and Nicky sent this along for you in the monthly care package. Give him a call, okay?” He dropped a plain box in front of Andrew then left, headed to where his friends were seated.

Andrew frowned at the ‘care package’ since Nicky sent one to each of them (and why did he have to talk to the pest?), ready to throw it at his negligent brother until he picked it up and sensed the contents sloshing about inside. Finally, Aaron had come through for him; he slid the box into his backpack then proceeded to ignore the lecture.

He made sure to stash the two bottles of whiskey (cheap, but beggars weren’t about to complain) in his closet when he got back to his room and Ben was distracted, then joined the rest of the team for ‘game-prep’ (going over stats yet again, Tetsuji’s wonderful ‘win or be known forever as scum’ speech, endless warm-up and drills, and then the damn game).

He was half-tempted to drain one of the bottles dry first.

Instead, he clenched a hand around his bottle of pills before he took half a one, just enough to get him through the next couple hours, for the manic buzz in his veins to fade before the start of the game. He wished that he could flush all of them down the toilet, but he’d already tried in those first few months to go without them and failed miserably.

There was no coming off them while locked up in a bathroom for a few days, like he’d done with Aaron.

He didn’t feel the insidious, awful artificial euphoria begin to bleed away until well into the first quarter of the game, as he sat on the bench and watched the Ravens run the Scarlet Knights ragged out on the court. Rutgers might be one of the better ranked universities, but they were late in putting together an Exy team; they had a few good players, but not enough yet to be a serious contender.

Ivanova was able to keep the score low, especially when she had Hebig and Moreau helping her with defense. As much as it annoyed Andrew that the tall Frenchman was Nathaniel’s partner, the man was a good backliner and meshed well with the others, and was near perfect when Nathaniel was out on court with him.

Andrew had hoped that as the drug burned out, he’d be less fascinated with his soulmate, would realize how foolish he’d been to be drawn to him, to think that he could- to think anything about Nathaniel. Yet as he sat there, slightly numb but no longer filled with false emotions, he couldn’t help but be conscious of the lean figure dressed in black and red a few seats way on the bench… conscious of his presence and how the young man made him feel.

It was something so powerful yet fragile at the same time, such a protective, overwhelming urge, and it was all for Nathaniel.

Andrew was so fucked.

He sat off by himself during the halftime break, mentally reviewing how Rutgers had played during the first half, while Tetsuji berated players for their mistakes on court and reviewed plays for the last two quarters. Feeling the sensation of being watched, he glanced up to find Nathaniel gazing at him; his soulmate turned his head when Andrew met his eyes.

Riko clapped him on the shoulder before he stepped out on court and nearly got a racquet smashed down on his head. “Remember, shut the goal and he’s all yours.”

Andrew bit back on a retort that his memory was fine, mostly because he couldn’t help but add ‘unlike yours, you useless prick’.

Rutgers must have spent their break being yelled at, too, since they came back on court determined to redeem themselves, not that it did them any good. Andrew thought of Nathaniel bruised and held down, about him being a ‘reward’, then let his world narrow down to the ball and who had control of it. As that person approached his end of the court, his memory, usually a curse, pulled up their stats and playing style to help him prepare to defend the goal.

That was, if he needed to defend it; Loiseau and Bautista did a decent job of driving away the Rutgers players in the third quarter, then Moreau and Hebig took over for the last one. As always, Moreau put his size and strength to good use to block the opposing players from reaching the goal, and coordinated the defense with Hebig. Andrew didn’t exactly relax for the last part of the game, but he allowed himself a deep breath and the thought that his deal with Riko might not have been so insane after all.

That he could actually keep Nathaniel safe.

He was exhausted by the end of the game - exhausted, sore, covered in sweat and beginning to feel the first twinges of withdrawal, but he’d held up his end of the bargain: Rutgers hadn’t scored a single point in the second half. The crowd roared in victory as the final buzzer rang, and all he wanted was to go shower then find someplace quiet to curl up.

First he had to suffer through the stupid post-game handshake (touching all those people) then the locker room; at least Tetsuji saved the game review for the next day and everyone already knew that Riko and Kevin would do the post-game interviews. All he cared about was washing off the stink and some of the soreness with a bunch of hot water, and was one of the first in the large wash room.

When he came out, it was to find Riko talking to an upset Moreau (with no Nathaniel in sight); Riko flashed him a ‘thumbs up’ gesture before the prick sauntered away. Intent on reaching his locker so he could change, Andrew figured he’d deal with the backliner later and went to walk past him, only to lash out when Moreau grabbed his shoulder.

“Listen, if you touch him I’ll-“

Andrew spun around and fisted his hands into Moreau’s sweaty jersey then slammed him into the nearest wall; he had to yank on the material to pull the tall bastard down to somewhat face level. “Did I touch him last time?” he gritted out in a low voice so none of the Ravens gathering around them would overhear. “Did I?” When Moreau gave a reluctant shake of his head, Andrew tugged some more on the damp, black material. “I’m doing this so no one else gets him.”

Moreau appeared stunned by that claim, then quickly resumed scowling. “I will gut you if you hurt him.”

There was a slight bit less venom in the words that time, so Andrew took that to be a general warning for show.  He clicked his tongue as he pushed away from the backliner. “You’re spending the night in my room,” he called out as he walked over to his locker to get dressed, aware of the other Ravens staring at them.

For once ‘glad’ of the attention, he figured let them find out that Nathaniel was ‘his’ so he wouldn’t put up with anyone disagreeing on that front.

He was given a lot of sideway glances while he changed then walked out of the locker room, but no one said a word. He pushed aside the growing sense of nausea from withdrawal as his body clamored for another pill, for a hit of artificial mania, determined to face Nathaniel as himself.

When he reached Nathaniel’s room, he knocked twice then entered; Nathaniel sat on the bed in a defensive huddle, his arms wrapped around his long legs, dressed in one of Moreau’s jerseys and an impressive scowl on his face.

“And you said you’re not like the others. Liar.”

Andrew arched an eyebrow at the amount of scorn and hatred directed his way right then, impressed despite himself. “All I did was walk through the door.”

“You made a fucking deal with Riko for me!” Nathaniel shouted as he unfurled enough to snatch up a book from his nightstand and throw it at Andrew; of course he had good aim, Andrew barely managed to bat it aside in time. “For every week!”

“Every week I manage to nearly shut down the goal,” Andrew confessed.

Nathaniel produced a ragged laugh as he tucked himself into the corner of his bed. “Yeah, now you take playing seriously, when it gets you something, huh? When you get to act like the mark on your arm means you own someone when it doesn’t, it doesn’t mean anything other than you’re an asshole and the Fates hate me and I wish I could just burn it off and have everyone leave me alone!” He’d started out yelling at Andrew but ended up practically tucked into a ball with his arms wrapped around his head, his tone one of misery.

A misery which Andrew understood, considering all the times he’d wished much the same about his soulmate mark, after all the grief Drake had caused him over it, after believing no one would want him because of Drake and the others. Then what did he find? A lovely young man bearing terrible scars on his body and soul who was so much like him that it hurt.

Andrew had hoped he wouldn’t feel anything as he stood before Nathaniel with the drug (temporarily) out of his system, but he’d been deluding himself on that front. The protective urge he’d experienced earlier returned so strongly that he moved before he became aware of it, was kneeling on the bed before he could tell himself to stop.

Nathaniel reacted to his presence immediately; he began to sit up, to move his arms (to lash out), but stilled when Andrew cupped the back of his neck, his blue eyes wide with a mix of panic and fear.

“Nothing but this,” Andrew assured him, angry at himself for causing that fear. “I swear. Okay? Yes or no?” He just wanted to calm Nathaniel down.

His soulmate was quiet for a couple seconds, enough to make him begin to pull away. “Yes,” Nathaniel breathed out, his expression now wary as if he waited to see what Andrew would do next. Despite the strain on his tired muscles from leaning forward, despite the urge to sink his fingers in Nathaniel’s thick hair, despite the growing sense of nausea and dizziness, Andrew remained still and focused on the slowing pulse beneath his thumb.

“Why are you here?” Nathaniel eventually asked as he continued to gaze up at Andrew. “What do you want?”

He ignored the second (dangerous) question. “If I’m here, the others aren’t.”

“Are you serious?” Nathaniel scoffed, then frowned when Andrew remained quiet. “You’re really going to try to shut down the goal every game then come here and only sleep, just to keep Riko from handing me off to the others?”

He didn’t need to sound so doubtful about everything; if Andrew was the sensitive type, he’d be offended right then.

“You don’t snore like Ben does,” Andrew drawled as he forced himself to let go of Nathaniel and move. As he walked away from his incredulous soulmate, he motioned toward Moreau’s bed. “Tell your partner to get a spare set of clean sheets for me so I don’t have to sleep in his smelly bed.”

It took some effort, but he managed to make it into the bathroom without walking into the door or tripping over his feet; once inside with the door closed, he fumbled for his pills and choked one down, then slumped against the sink with the water running until the nausea was under control. He hated having to take the damn medication again, but Nathaniel might object if he spent the night puking his guts out.

When he finally left the bathroom, it was to find Nathaniel beneath the covers and facing the wall, and what appeared to be a set of clean sheets folded on top of Moreau’s bed. Andrew only spent a moment regarding what he hoped was a peace offering of sorts before he worked quickly to strip and remake the bed, tired and more than willing to fall asleep.

Maybe it was from working so hard during the game, maybe it was because his soulmate was nearby, but Andrew slept without any nightmares that night. He woke up when Nathaniel rose early and left the room, then got half an hour more sleep before he had to get up for another ‘fun’ day at the Nest.

Moreau caught up to him later in the day, when he was fixing a coffee to take back to his room after their morning practice; the other Ravens in the break room (including Ben) were quick to leave, obviously expecting some sort of fight between the two of them.

Andrew gave him a grin as he hopped onto the counter to sit. “Got any croissants on ya, Valjean?”

Moreau sighed as he fetched two mugs from a cabinet. “Do you try to be so annoying or is it natural?”

Andrew gasped and clutched his free hand to his chest. “Me? Annoying? I guess I’ll have to really lay on the charm now.”

“God forbid,” Moreau muttered as he glanced toward the door as if to ensure they were alone. He was quiet as he made two cups of tea (hmm, who might the other be for?), then approached Andrew with due caution. “You’re protecting Nathaniel,” he said, his deep voice quiet and expression serious.

“Why would I do a thing like that?” Andrew asked as he kicked his feet back and forth, uncaring about the heels of his sneakers hitting the lower cabinets.

Moreau frowned then set the mugs down so he could tug on the left sleeve of his sweatshirt to reveal the fleur de lis and wave pattern of his own soul mark – the mark which was only revealed when he showered. “Because it’s what we do, we protect them.” His black eyebrows drew together as his frown deepened. “Well, most of us.”

Hmm, not people like Nathaniel’s father, maybe? But one thing at a time. “You know your soulmate,” Andrew accused as he held his mug of coffee beneath his chin, curious to see if Moreau would tell him the truth.

The backliner was quiet for a moment then nodded. “He plays Exy,” Moreau whispered with a gleam of fear in his eyes. “I can’t let Riko know.”

No, or Riko would use Moreau against the man, much like he’d used Nathaniel against Andrew (had he suspected they might be tied together because of their pasts?). “What does Riko have against you?” Andrew asked as he leaned forward. “You and Nathaniel? Who’s Nathan Wesninski, really?”

Moreau shook his head as he tugged down the sleeve of his shirt. “Not here,” he hissed out as he once again glanced toward the door. “That’s… not here.” He picked up the mugs and stared at Andrew as if searching for something, then nodded. “But if you’re serious about Nathaniel….”

“I want answers, so tell me where ‘not here’ is,” Andrew commanded as he poured his lousy coffee onto the floor while he held Moreau’s gaze.

Moreau nodded again as if answering an internal question. “Later. Riko and Kevin will be gone to play for their professional team, and Nathaniel to work on translations. I’ll let you know when to stop by.”

“Ooh, it’s a date,” Andrew drawled as he jumped to the floor and splashed coffee everywhere. “Just so you know, I don’t put out, I’m not that kind of guy.” He sauntered out of the break room to the sound of Moreau muttering in French.

They were going to be besties, he just knew it.

*******

Oh boy is Jean in for it now.

So... I’ve being going back and forth on this, but I’ve set up a discord channel (have had it for a while, actually). Don’t know if people would be interested in it as a place to get a look at fics, stuff in progress and things like that?

[sadboyayeron]

THE ONLY VALID MORIYAMA Nikoshi Doe

I came up with this Idea of Kevin having to raise Rikos son who’s name I decide would be Nikoshi Doe aka Niko

Enjoy

So If you Read “Tapping on my Chamber door” 

You know Nikoshi’s mother, Naima Dixon was born in Jamaica but came to the states at a young age after her mom past away.  She lived in the Bronx with her Aunt. She had tight curls aften in box breads or corn cornrows and dark skin with light brown eyes. She was 5’8.  Had a muscular build from all the years of track and had a scholarship to run at Eager Allen University. She was soon to have a spot on the olympic team for long jump, 100, 200 and 400 meters. She was then pregnant with Nikoshi after her and Riko started there little hook up.  The knew of each other but they first met in class.  She noticed Riko looking at her.

“Like what you see.”  I was trying to catch him off guard but he didn’t even look surprise.  But then he smiled.  Something sharp that left me feeling tingly, similar to how I feel before racing.  

“Not to bad, no.”  He chuckled, looked me up and down before he landed back on my eyes, “Want to sit.”

He left me in a trance and I took a seat next to him and sat my books in front of me.  I tucked some braids behind my ear and looked at him again, he was looking back with a smug smile on his face.  

At first I was thinking Nikoshi was Rikos frozen sperm and his mother was forced by Rikos uncle to have him BUT I decide that Riko died before he knew about Naima being pregnant She found out she was pregnant and went to Riko’s uncle for help and he said to give him the kid and she could get her scholarship Back.  So she agreed naming him “Nico” but sadly she died while giving birth from bleeding out. Tesuji doesn’t use that name and changes it to ‘Nikoshi’ stripping him of any last name (Doe) putting the kid into the system in the same place she grow up in Bronx. Ichirou is informed of Nikoshi ten years later after having his Uncle killed. Who then informs kevin.

Nikoshi is from the Bronx has a accent when he speaks. He knows Spanish because of the amount of Dominican and Puerto Rican foster parents he’s had.  Kinda understands broken english two because one of his foster brothers was from Jamaica which is cool because he knows he’s half Jamaican and some type of asian. He wears beat up high top jordan 1s baggy ripped jeans and long sleeves with a baggy jacket. He plays soccer because the system put him on a team and he’s very fast. He didn’t have much clothes but his best ones are the uniforms and he’s fine with that. He also plays street basketball and baseball with some kids in the area.

Kevin has to take Nikoshi in, according to Ichirou. Bringing Neil and Andrew with him. Ichirou just sent him a picture a kid and he was confused until he got that call that explained everything. He doesn’t need to explain who the kid is because you can clearly tell from the picture. Though the kid has milk cholclate skin, and curly hair that falls around his head in a fro.

When he frist sees Nico he has a scrape scab on his cheek, bruises on his wrist and purple knuckles. His ears a surprisingly pierced.

They find out Nikoshi Doe goes by Niko, he likes chocolate and cafe con leche (coffee), he likes shoes, he likes the color green, he uses a lot of slang and sometimes uses broken english and spanglish words, he’s quite but hyper and doesn’t know how to say still, asks why a lot, he hates math and likes to read, he loves listening to music it’s his safe place, he was diagnosed with ADHD/ADD and takes a pill in the morning and after noon on school days, he doesn’t like the way the pills make him feel, he likes Bee, Bee suspects Niko my be Borderline but it’s hard to tell, Kevin explains Riko was too.  When they go to pick up Nikoshi they are informed of his diagnoses. 

“So Kevin Day, It is very nice to meet you my husband loves watching you guys play Exy,” She smiled at them and then opened a drawer in her desk pulling out two folders.“ Now these paper were just printed out today.  One from Nikoshi’s Doctor and another from his psychologist.”  Kevin straightened his back more at that.

“Psychologist?”  She looked up at Kevin.

“Yes, a lot of children in foster care go to see a therapist.  It helps cope with abandonment and makes sure the kids are transitioning well in their new homes.”  She opened one of the folders.  “Nikoshi saw a therapist who recommended him to a psychologist.  He was diagnosed with ADHD/ADD and given medication.  He went through three different medications before he was put on Focalin XR.  His biggest issues are impulsivity, managing feelings, and energy.  There is more information in the folder with getting the prescription at a pharmacy and things to know about his behavior.  He takes Focalin every morning before school, its not needed on the weekends but to long off it isn’t the best idea.  Though if you want him off the medication, if you ever come to adopting him you can do that.”  She looked towards the other two. “Will you two be helping take care of Nikoshi.”

“Yeah we are, is there anything else we need to know.  If he needs a therapist we already got that covered.  We can send her the information.”  Neil replied with a bored tone but

“Thats good to know, he just saw the doctor last week.  He gained some weight and is now at a more healthier weight then he was before.”  She sighed. “You have to reminded him to eat, he forgets to and he doesn't ask for food.  The foster home he was just at was good with keeping a schedule, he ate, took his meds, ate at school, had a snack at home, soccer practice and then dinner.  He gets distracted and has little habits that cause him focus to much on random things.  The meds take away his hunger also, so it important that he finishes.”  She then closed both folders and stacked them together before sliding them to Kevin.  

Kevin didn’t know how to process that.  This information sounded to familiar.  He always had to remind Riko to eat something.  Riko would go days without eating, or sleeping, or even both.  It got so bad the master had to tube feed him because he past out and didn’t get back up.  Niko always got back up.  He was taken out of his thoughts when the lady, Jennifer stood.  He picked up the folders and got up following Andrew and Neil out the door.  Nikoshi was still sitting in his chair, he was singing his legs slowly and seemed fixated on his hands.

“Nikoshi, these gentlemen here are going to be your new guardians,”  Niko looked up at them.  He got a better look at there faces, now that the glasses were off he could easily recognize who the taller man was with the chess piece on his cheek bone.  He was confused o say the least.  This had to be some sick joke, or a stupid stuPID dream.  He looked at the other too, the screw that littered the red heads tan face and the man with blond hair and black studs.

“Deadass?”  He blurted out suddenly.  Fuck.  He did not mean to blurt that out.  Kevin day looked taken back by his statement and the other too snickered from slightly behind him.  The lady looked horrified.

Riko used to self harm, stop eating for days, wouldn’t sleep for days either.  His uncle had to force him into a tube feeder once because of this.  Kevin and Riko had to see a therapist and she diagnosed Riko. His uncle disregarded it and gave him sum type of pills that made Riko’s anger at himself turn down a bit but he was more depressed. He tried to commit 3 times after. Kevin made him promise not to. He flushed the pills and started to abuse others.

Kevin explains this to Neil and Andrew.  They then try to learn more about BPD.  They watch youtube videos, read articles and books on it till they had a better understanding of the disorder.  They learn about the self-destructive tendencies and suicidal gestures that are quite common with the disorder.  They all try there best to build a good support system. 

Niko has a hard time with his identity and ‘who he is’,  he tries to remember that Kevin wants him and isn't going to abandon him, he tries to keep his shifts in moods to himself but in only makes things worse.  He tends to shut down in his room more often then not.  He finds himself getting angry at little things knowing he shouldn’t but he still does.  Anger attacks aren't as bad as the empty feeling he gets sometimes.

When Niko meets all the foxes he drifts more towards Nicky for whatever reason.  He finds that he like Nickys happy vibes and feels it radiate from him.  He likes to soak in it.

Niko likes talking to Neil, he gets candy from Andrew, and he likes playing Exy with Kevin. He didn’t like school and says it’s hard for him but he still makes honor roll no problem.

During the second month of school when he first started living with Kevin he expriences racism for maybe the first time.  He didn’t have any friends, nor knew anybody.  He could tell he was different from the other kids.  They were mostly white with a splash of color here and there.  The way they talked and walked was different then how he did.  He didn’t grew up with white picket fences like they seemed to.  They dressed different too.  He didn’t like the stares he was getting from the kids in his class.

“Nice hair are you a girl?”  One of the boys said, with his little click at his back.  It was recess and Niko stuck to staying to himself drawling in his note book that Andrew gave him. 

“No.”  The boys continued to laugh.  He hated when people talked about his hair.  He didn't like his hair.  Especially when his foster mothers always tugged and pulled on it.  That wasn't just it though.  It reminded him of his foster father Mr. James.

“Such pretty hair.”

The boys crept closers and Niko started to feel closed in.  One of them pulled out scissors and two grabbed him by the shoulders.  One talked about how there dad said them Black boys need to cut there hair.  Another used a slur Niko heard a lot back in the Bronx, used it himself when with the kids in the neighborhood but he never heard it used like this.  He started to struggle but another one grabbed his face and held him down so his face fell between his knees.  He felt chuncks of hair being cut of from his head as they fell down his back and some at his feet.  

He felt his eyes water and struggled harder.  He kicked the one to his right in the shin, knowing how much it hurt from when he played soccer with out shin guards.  The kids let go of that shoulder and he swung his arm hitting another kid.  They all let go once they heard a teacher yell at them.  Niko reached for the scissors and threw them in the grass.  The boys ran away and Niko was left to look at the small and large chunks of his hair on the concrete.  He didn’t mean to bother anybody.  He didn't ask to have this type of hair.  He didn’t ask to be different.  Sometimes he missed the Bronx but then remembered his foster sister getting shot, and his doped up foster parents he used to end up with.  He didn't want to go back, but he found himself missing it sometimes.

Nobody asked abut his hair during the rest of the school day.  Not even his teacher.  Its fine he didn't want to bother anybody.  When Andrew came to pick him up he was wearing his hoodie.  Today Neil and Andrew were coming over, so was Aaron.  Aaron practically lived with him and Kevin now though.  He said nothing on the way home.  He didn't want to bother them.  He was trying his hardest not to.  

But then he got home he went straight to the bathroom and locked the door.  He didn’t hear Kevin nor Aaron calling him.  He stared in to the mirror and glared at himself.  Disgusting. You look like a girl. He ripped off his hood and he felt something in himself crack.  His hair was clearly uneven.  Some areas you couldn’t tell but he could see how his curls on his forehead were shortened compared to the pieces on the sides.  He could tell where every spot was that had been cut, like there were circles showing him where to look.  A broken sob cut through his throat.  The tears rolled down his cheeks.  He always thought he was an ugly crier.  He grabbed his hair and pulled.  He kept pulling till he felt arms wrap around his torso.  He wanted to fight who ever they were off but he couldn't.  They grabbed his hands but they couldn't pry them from his hair.  He heard someone calling his name and found a face to that voice.  He noticed another person accompanied him in the mirror.  Holding on to him.  It wasn’t his voice he heard though.  He saw the other three at the bathroom entrance but it was Aaron standing closest to him.

“Niko its okay, let go buddy.”  He didn’t know if he meant his hands or his feelings but he let them go.  He saw more pieces of hair fall through his hands but ignored it and them screamed.  Kevin turned him around and held him again.  Kevin lowered himself to his knees to let Niko cry and scream into his neck.  He rubbed his back till he calmed down.  Neil and Andrew left to prepare some ice cream and play music.  Kevin noticed the hair that fell to the floor and so did Aaron.  It didn’t match the amount that should still be connected to his head.

Niko told them what happened at school with less emotion then he displayed before.  They were all furious but chose to keep it inside to comfort Niko.  They called the school and told them what happened.  The school apologized but Kevin still wasn't letting Niko go back to that school.  He transferred Niko to another and reassured him it was okay and it was the same distance anyways.  They took Niko to the babor shop and they evened out his hair.  He got it cut some on the sides as well, allowing the back and top to be longer.  His hair showed more off his forehead and ear piercings now.  He felt more exposed, but was happy with the hair cut.

When he meets Dan she gives him oils and creams to put in his hair.  Even showed him how to wash it too, Matt helps.  He got to meet there kids.

Allison braided his hair down for when he graduated Elementary School.  She teaches how how to do other things like twist, braids, and box braids.

When he goes to college Renee helps him bleach the ends of his hair blond.

He has nightmares often. And likes to have hot chocolate to calm his nerves. He gets irritated easily, they learn. When he gets irritated he stops talking and fidgets, tapping his foot and cracking his knuckles. 

Kevin’s night terrors slowly fade as Riko’s dark shadow fades into Nikos warm glow.

Niko definitely learns how to skateboards when Aaron gives him his old one. Kevin likes to watch them practice it together.  Just like Aaron likes to watch Kevin teach Niko Exy.  He joins a team in Middle School.  He's definitely going to be something.

Hope you guys like this.  Leave ask and suggestions about Nikoshi Doe. I would love to hear about it and write the prompts.  

[markonasurface]

41/50 - “What are you doing in my house?”

Fandom: All for the Game/The Foxhole Court Characters/pairings: Jeremy, Jean/jerejean Summary: Jeremy’s had a hard week and Jean wants to talk.

A/N: I’m kind of indifferent to jerejean but I tried. Thank you for the prompt - messy or not;)

**warning: Jean talks about being raped.**

Jeremy sat down on the couch of his childhood home and sighed. It had been a trying day - no, week. He was just glad it was over.

He thought of his team. All of them working so hard to play hard but not using any unnecessary excessive force. He was proud of them. They were set to win the Day Spirit Award for the ninth year in a row if last week’s game didn’t ruin it.

He closed his eyes and leaned his head back. He was one of the few people who believed in David Wymack’s cause. He didn’t scoff at it or view it as a publicity attempt.

David Wymack gave Jeremy hope. Restored his faith in humanity some would say.

If David Wymack could risk his team’s status year after year to give troubled youth another chance, Jeremy figured the least he could do was take on just one more Raven onto his team.

He had thought, “How bad could it be?” The former Raven had only been a freshman when the Exy world was rocked by the scandal of their treatment in Castle Evermore. How much damage could one year really do?

Jeremy had learned the hard way that one year was enough to tarnish the Trojans’ reputation for never having received a red card. If getting their first ever red card had happened first, maybe Jeremy wouldn’t have done the other thing that was ruining his week.

Or maybe his words would have been viewed as desperate instead of just misplaced.

Jeremy wasn’t one to dwell but it was his fifth and final year with the Trojans. It was supposed to be his best year, yet.

He sat up, removing the glass cork from his father’s favorite bottle in his crystal set. He began pouring whisky over the ice in his glass when he heard a thump. He startled, spilling alcohol on the coffee table.

Setting the crystal bottle down he turned slowly, flinching at the sight of another person before breathing out a huge breath. He closed his eyes and tried to slow his heartrate.

“What are you doing in my house?” he questioned.

Jean walked around the couch and sat at the other end. “I remembered you saying your parents were out of town.”

“Ever hear of knocking?” Jeremy took a sip of his drink, face pinched in an unusual display of annoyance.

“Door was open.” Jean shrugged and Jeremy pretended his heart didn’t do backflips at the sight. He finished his drink quickly and poured himself another. “I wanted to talk to you.”

Jeremy refused to let himself feel hopeful. Jean probably just came to tell him he’s leaving the team. The Foxes would take him, which meant Jean rather deal with the shit he went through with Kevin than the awkwardness of sharing a dorm with Jeremy.

Jean reached out and grabbed Jeremy’s glass to get his attention. “Can we? Talk?”

“Honestly, I’ve had one of the worst weeks of my life,” Jeremy sighed, taking his hand back and finishing his second drink. He inwardly cringed and said, “I know it’s nothing compared to probably your worst week but -”

“Doesn’t mean it didn’t suck,” Jean finished for him quietly.

His steady gaze was unnerving, grey eyes always a storm that made Jeremy feel torn between quickly averting his own eyes and never looking away. His fingers itched to push his black hair away from his face or trace the tattoo under his left eye.

Instead he poured another drink. He hesitated then asked, “Do you want one?” Without waiting for an answer, he stood and went to get Jean a glass and some ice.

Jean accepted the glass from him but didn’t drink. Jeremy was acutely aware of Jean’s eyes on him but he was too flustered to look again.

“Look,” Jean finally broke the brief silence. “I’m sorry.”

Jeremy choked on his drink and asked, “Sorry? What -”

His spluttering didn’t deter Jean who continued, “I didn’t mean to be so harsh in my rejection ... I just - I like you.”

“As a friend ...” Jeremy tried to show Jean that didn’t bother him even when it was clear to both of them that it did.

“Yes,” Jean said fiercely and Jeremy’s heart fell. “But - more - I think?”

“Best friends?” Jeremy moaned miserably.

Jean sighed and stood up. He put his glass down though he was tempted to start drinking to make things easier on himself.

He moved closer, sitting on the middle cushion. He grabbed Jeremy’s hands in his. “More than that,” he said, cheeks turning pink.

“But you -” Jeremy leaned in, confused. “This whole week I thought -”

“I owe you an explanation,” Jean said, feeling slightly sick.

Jeremy must have noticed how uncomfortable he was because he quickly said, “Hey, you don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to.” He rubbed the back of Jean’s hands soothingly and Jean was reminded why he was doing this.

“When I joined the - when I was sold to Riko I liked girls,” Jean forced out over the lump in his throat. “I was still young but there were only one or two girls on the Ravens at a time. There was also a girl our age, a daughter of a friend of the Master who came to help us with our homework sometimes.”

Jean took a moment to remember to breathe and continued, “She kissed me and Riko broke my finger. Kevin explained that we couldn’t have distractions. Feelings - we weren’t allowed to have feelings.”

Jeremy gently stroked the most crooked of Jean’s fingers. “That’s -”

“It’s why feelings don’t make sense to me sometimes. Having feelings scares me because growing up in Evermore we weren’t allowed to have certain feelings and if we did Riko used them against us.

“When I was fifteen I started thinking I might like - I might be gay,” he quieted. “And it wasn’t okay. Riko wasn’t a very tolerant person so I knew it was wrong. It was okay that the Ravens were all fucking each other because there were no feelings involved; it was just sex. But Riko said when he decided it was time for us to lose our virginity we would only be allowed to fuck girls.”

“Jean,” Jeremy said, eyes wide and he realized he was squeezing his hands too tightly.

Jean let out a shuddery breath and loosened his grip. “Sorry, I just -”

“It’s okay. I get it.” He pulled him slightly closer.

“No.” Jean shook his head. “That’s not it. It’s not all.”

“You don’t have to tell me,” Jeremy moved a hand to his shoulder.

Jean closed his eyes and said, “I want to - if that’s okay with you.”

His heart skipped a beat but he nodded. “Of course it is. No matter what, I’m here for you.”

“Sorry, I need your hand - down here,” Jean’s voice was weak and he tried not to be embarrassed. Jeremy complied, placing both hands into Jean’s.

Jean forced himself to look into Jeremy’s eyes. “When I was sixteen,” he whispered. He cleared his throat. “He - Riko made - guys from the team fuck me.” He spit it out like he couldn’t get the words out and away from him quick enough.

“Oh, no,” Jeremy said sadly and had to resist the urge to pull out of Jean’s grasp.

“I begged him not to do it to me.” His words were rapidly spilling out now. “I begged and begged and it made it even better for him. He laughed. He held me down and told me to shut up. Then he would beat me for being disobedient before sending for another and they would fuck me because he told them to.”

���Jean,” Jeremy said, voice thick, unable to look away from his unblinking eyes.

“He only stopped when I laid there silently and took it.” A tear slipped down his cheek. “Then he hit me because I didn’t make it fun for him. He let Kevin fix me up before the same men scrimmaged with us.”

Jean gave Jeremy a bitter smile that hurt both of their hearts. “So I’m sorry for freaking out when you asked for a date and I’m sorry for hitting you when you kissed me.”

“No,” Jeremy squeezed Jean’s hands even though his fingers were going numb. “I’m sorry. I read the situation all wrong and I shouldn’t have kissed you.”

“I wanted you to,” Jean admitted, hanging his head. “It makes me feel sick. I want you and don’t all at the same time and I feel like - I’ve been feeling like I’m going crazy for awhile now.”

“Jean - can I?” His hand hovered in front of his face and Jean nodded. Jeremy lifted Jean’s head with a finger under his chin. “There’s nothing wrong with you.”

“Everything is -”

“No. None of that was your fault.” Jeremy brought his hands up to cup Jean’s face. His thumbs ran over old scars put there by Riko. “Where do I start? It’s okay to be gay. You knew I was and you’ve never treated me different because of it. Or Dermott or Alvarez.”

He swiped a tear off his cheek. “Riko and all those men were wrong. They were all sick. No one ever should have touched you without your consent. They should be ashamed, not you. You have nothing to be embarrassed about. You were wronged.”

Tears were falling down Jean’s cheeks, too many, too fast. Jeremy ducked his head to peer into Jean’s eyes. “I like you, Jean. I really like you. I hope you didn’t think this would scare me off.”

He smiled and Jean gave a wet laugh. He tried to cut off a choked sob but failed.

“Can I hug you?”

Jean collapsed in his arms and Jeremy held him. “I’m here for you, however you want me. However I can help ... if you need boundaries or space ... if you want me to make you an appointment with Timothy. I’ll bake you a hundred cupcakes. Or some beignets - you like those, right?”

He felt Jean tremble and said, “Or I can just hold you. Is that alright?”

Jeremy rubbed a hand down Jean’s arm while he cried into his chest. “I’m here.”

[nekojitachan]

How to Steal a Million

This is... part three?

We’re really starting to bring the gang together here, and the plot will really kick in after this!

*******

Neil lay sprawled upon a velvet-covered divan in Allison’s humongous bedroom while she stood in front of a gilded mirror which she claimed had belonged to Marlene Dietrich (he believed her), wearing nothing but lacy lingerie (he would go out on a limb and say that she had a date with Renee later) and tossing very (very) expensive pieces of clothes about while she decided what to wear that day. “So you’re basically telling me that you stabbed some no-name thief, bandaged him up and then let him go? Oh cutie-pie, just wait until I tell Renee! She’ll be so pleased to learn that you’re turning to the light, or something like that.” Allison beamed at him as she casually threw a Gucci shirt over her shoulder.

“I’m not going soft,” Neil sneered as he sat up, “it’s just that Stuart gets so grumpy when there’s blood on the Persian rugs and I spent all of last November swiping things for Berger to make up for taking out one of his best breakers.” He sighed as he thought of how he’d just wanted to spend the month hanging out with his friends before the city got too crazy for the holidays (too many tourists and people rushing about for the season), but no, it hadn’t worked out that way, had it? “Though he was American, so I doubt he’s associated with any of the local gangs.” Better safe than sorry, though, especially when dealing with a grumpy Stuart. There was just too much sighing and whinging and ‘where did I go wrong, Mary? Where did I go wrong?’

(Neil could give him one hell of a list, but there’d just be more damn sighing and whinging.)

“Hmm, caution’s not a bad thing,” Allison agreed as she eyed a Dior skirt before tossing it aside, too. “Though I worry about you, so damn cute and barely psychotic, and what do you do when you have a guy in your home late at night? You beat him up and send him on his way.” She shook her head as if disappointed. “It’s time for us to go to work again, grasshopper.” Her glossy red lips spread in a predatory grin before she leaned into the one closet to grab more clothes.

Hmm, that… that had possibilities; at the very least, it would serve as a distraction from the whole Venus mess, and it might be a good idea to have more cash on hand because of the Venus mess. “Who’s the mark, and won’t Renee be upset, talking about the whole ‘light side’?” Was that the right term? Matt had tried to make him watch the movies about the whole ‘light’ and ‘dark’ thing, but he’d fallen asleep within ten minutes.

It didn’t help that Henry had dared him to break into four mansions the night before….

“Oh, don’t worry, the target is grade-A asshole, so much that Renee won’t mind in the slightest. Now, what shall I wear?” She pulled out a slinky black McQueen dress with straps and rivets that would cover her from neck to ankles (for the most part) yet cling to a figure which attracted men and women alike (but not Neil), and a flowing light blue Chloe wrap dress.

“Definitely the McQueen,” Neil decided. “You’re clearly giving them fair warning that you’re ready to utterly destroy them, but they’re too busy drooling over your ass to care. Plus, I think Renee finds the skulls on the purses adorable.”

“As it should be, cutie-pie, as it should be.” Allison smirked as she dropped the Chloe gown to the floor; Neil shook his head and knew that Ines, Allison’s assistant, was paid more than enough to deal with the mess. “Once I slither into this, we’ll set about dressing you into something presentable and be on our way.”

Neil groaned as he lay back down and wondered if it wouldn’t have been such a bad thing, to let L.A. kill him in his sleep last night or something.

*******

Andrew tapped his fingers on the table while he waited for his ‘contact’ to arrive; he’d kept track of her over the years, and when Kevin had ‘dragged’ him to Paris for this latest case? Reached out to her in case he had need of her knowledge.

After last night? He definitely had need of Renee’s knowledge of the city, even if she seemed to have gone ‘straight’ in the last couple of years.

Well, straighter.

He’d finished his second meager cup of coffee (really, what did the French have against a decent size of coffee?) and his third cream puff (much better than the coffee) at the café not too far from the burnt husk of Notre Dame when Renee appeared. He noticed her decent French, which she used to order coffee and a couple of cream puffs, how her hair was now bleached silver with rainbow colored ends, her clothes simple but of good quality, and how she basically… she looked good. Looked at peace with herself.

When he’d first met her, it was barely a year after she’d gotten out of prison and was still trying to leave ‘Natalie Shields’ behind; she hadn’t appreciated Andrew being pointed her way for help with a case, yet she’d obliged after a rough introduction. Andrew had thought it an act initially, her attempt to change her life, to move on from Natalie and become Renee Walker, but he’d been convinced by the time he’d solved the forgery case. She’d helped out a couple of other times, then moved to Paris to take a job at a woman’s shelter.

“Hello, Andrew. You look good.” Renee’s voice was still soft and possessed a hint of her North Dakota upbringing. Despite him calling out of the blue, her smile was warm and dark eyes bright with affection. “Do you like Paris so far?”

“It’s crowded, the traffic is terrible and their coffee sucks. Plus, I was trapped on a plane for seven hours with Kevin Day. Seven hours,” he hissed as he folded his arms over his chest and slumped back in his chair. “Somehow, he’s still alive.”

“I’ll be certain to recommend you for sainthood over that extreme act of charity,” she murmured as she pushed the plate containing the cream puffs toward him. “Especially if he returns to the States alive as well.”

“Seven hours,” Andrew repeated as he did his best not to think about the flight home – one of them was going to be doped out of their minds for it, he just hadn’t decided who yet.

Renee stifled a giggle with the back of her right hand before she sipped her coffee. “Other than that, it’s going well?” She gazed at the band-aid on his throat before she looked him in the eye. “I assume if Kevin’s here, it’s not a vacation?”

“You assume correct.” He paused to eat one of the cream puffs (at least he was walking a lot to offset all the sweets) before he got down to business. “We’re here because of the Kleber-Lafayette Museum’s latest exhibit.”

“Ah.” Renee frowned as she turned her cup of coffee around on its saucer with the tips of her fingers. “I’m not sure what help I’ll be, since I’m not… well, I’m not involved in those things anymore, not really. And the little I am, just through a couple of associates, hasn’t brought me word of any trouble with that show.”

Now that was interesting – not that Renee knew ‘interesting people’, because he expected no less of the woman, but that she was already tied into gossip about the museum. “Really? Nothing at all?”

“No, nothing, it’s free of trouble as far as I know,” she insisted with a slight shake of her head.

Hmm.” Andrew had the last cream puff while he considered that. “What about Neil Josten? Have you heard about him?”

Renee was quiet while she finished her coffee then set it down without a sound, her motions smooth and too controlled. “I’m sorry, Andrew, but I believe we have a conflict of interests here.” That time, her smile was bland. “I do know him, but as a friend. He and his uncle regularly donate to the shelter, and he volunteers there as well.”

That wasn’t what Andrew wanted to hear, not about the sarcastic, handsome asshole who’d insulted him while bandaging him up last night – after nearly slitting his throat last night.

No one should look that damn good while giving him shit and continuously threatening to kill him. Maybe Aaron was right and there really was something wrong with Andrew….

Nah, Aaron was just jealous that Andrew was the older, better-looking, smarter twin.

Yet here Renee sat and proclaimed that Josten – the guy who’d tried to slit Andrew’s throat and gave him advice on who to rob – was a veritable angel. “Funny you say that, because I think I might be checking into his uncle because of work, and this,” he gestured to the little ‘scratch’ on his neck, “is from Josten.”

Renee frowned as she seemed to think about that. “Hmm, and what were you doing to provoke such a reaction out of him?” When Andrew was quiet, she nodded once. “Neil’s a good friend. He hasn’t had the easiest of times growing up, but he’s not a bad man.” She nodded again as she stood. “And I’d be careful, because he has people who care about him, who watch over him. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to return to work. Be careful, Andrew, you and Kevin.”

He watched her go then got up to leave himself, thoughts occupied with what she’d said – with what basically was a warning.

The more he learned about Neil Josten, the more the pieces didn’t fit together; if there was one thing (actually, there was a rather long list) that Andrew didn’t like, it was incomplete puzzles. He detested things that he couldn’t easily solve, that taunted him with their jagged edges that didn’t smooth out and fit together, with missing pieces and equations just waiting for that last bit to be figured out.

Josten? Neil Josten was all of that rolled together, was violence with a friendly smile, a teasing, lilting voice that poured out insults, a gorgeous man who’d shown no interest nor repulsion in Andrew despite his mild flirting.

Andrew had a job he was paid to do and now Riko Moriyama to deal with… but damnit, he’d figure out one Neil Josten before he left Paris, he swore to himself.

*******

Neil, dressed in McQueen as well (Allison had laughed as she ‘bullied’ him into the black blazer embellished with butterflies, but at least let him wear jeans and a pale grey shirt beneath it), escorted Allison into the cocktail party they were basically crashing (as if anyone would dare to throw Allison Reynolds out of a party she deigned to grace with her presence) – a cocktail party held during the middle of the day.

Someone was trying a bit too hard.

That someone turned out to be Riko Moriyama, which explained it rather well.

“Oh yes, Renee will even light a candle for us, I’m willing to bet,” Neil murmured in French as he gazed at the Japanese-American man who appeared to be boring Agnes Caron to tears; unfortunately, it was the freelance reporter’s job to suffer such things, and she probably was there to find out if he or his uncle were opening a new office in Paris.

Or, more importantly, if Riko’s brother was opening a new office in Paris, since the Stone Mountain corporation was much more important (powerful, wealthier, etc.) than Edgar Allan, one of its subsidiaries.

Was also free of rumored, quickly buried scandals – scandals tied to one Riko Moriyama.

Neil hoped that Agnes was careful, because she was a friend of Dan’s and never reported any lies about Allison.

Then he pushed all thoughts of the woman aside because Allison dragged him further into the room, right as Riko looked their way, an expression of interest on his face.

*******

Last part can be found here