#do we still use the term crack theory

[chokeonsordidmirth]

yall wanna hear my outlandish copia fan theory

escape the ministry spoilers below

so, in the tv room (nihil's room), there's a note saying that copia's tv usage has increased dramatically over the past week. realistically, this tells us two things: 1. copia is probably really depressed, and 2. the clergy is monitoring everything about copia. which theyve probably done with every papa. none of them were ever in control, it's always been the clergy. there's a lot more to read into there (and a lot in escape the ministry in general) but this post is about something much stupider.

depression and orwellian monitoring notwithstanding, we have a very clear connection with the tv to jesus he knows me and father jim defroque. jim defroque is a televangelist, he's the star of a wildly popular tv show and there's advertising for him literally everywhere. there's no way copia wouldn't have heard of him, especially if he's watching tv x hours a week. shots from the jesus he knows me music video are even playing on one of the tvs.

also in the main hall of the ministry there's a note from copia posing as a nameless ghoul (we know it's him because the note asks for juice boxes and theres hella juice boxes in his room) asking for a defroque sock. which is presumably jim defroque merch.

so we know that copia watches jim defroque and is apparently a fan. and then he goes on to cover a song about priests (jesus he knows me). and then he writes a song about priests (griftwood). and then he writes the lyric "i'll be the shadow, you'll be the light".

and i know this is not whats going to happen, all of this is completely silly, but... what if copia falls in love with jim defroque?

[applecherry108]

What if the Mastermind

is the merch narrator? 😂

[evilminji]

I... am haunted? By my Midi-chlorian theory?

Cause they are PROBABLY? Some sort of Symbiotic Bacteria?

Which was my theory. Cause "micro-organisms" is vague af? And doesn't exactly tell us what KIND? But it's probably not a mammal or some sort of fish? So like... helpful blood bacteria. Got it! No different then a good gut biome. Makes perfect sense!

Yeah, THIS one has? For some reason? A hyper sensitivity to fundamental forces of reality? But I mean? Monkeys with type writers, right? Something, somewhere, was bound to get it. Some organisms get better smell to survive, some get sensitive whiskers. The blood bacteria got jacked in to Reality's newsreel. Some low ranking admin privileges.

Still? Needs a HOST to survive though. Doesn't, itself, even really HAVE a brain.

Cause it's a Bacteria.

A Bacteria and... and Bacteria can be multiplied. Grown. Obviously? Midi-chlorians refuse to do so outside of a living body. Or the Sith and various other researchers, bother ethical and UNETHICAL, would have figured out how to crack Midi-chlorian development.

They ALSO? We can only assume? DO NOT mix. As in? Any Midi-chlorian's? Removed from the Original Host™ die off pretty promptly. (In time with the blood rotting or new body assimilating the fresh, donated, blood.) So you presumably, couldn't take from, say, Skywalker and give to an average farmer, and have that farmer become mildly force sensitive.

Even THOUGH? The BLOOD? Is where his Midi-chlorians are! So PRESUMABLY? So long as he and the farmer had compatible blood types? That SHOULD happen! Because Anikin his a SHIT TON of Midi-chlorian bacteria in his blood and the farmer would be receiving some of that High Production Strain.

Not saying the farmer would ever become a powerhouse. But? There should? Be a difference? Even if it was only temporarily.

Yet? It seems? Like Midi-chlorian strains? Just don't MIX. They split off, during development of a child, begin cultivation of their own unique colony, and never again! Shall the stains blend. I'd go so far? As to say? They probably ATTACK other Midi-chlorians in THEIR space.

Like part of the immune system. Disease, poison, parasites, and of course? Those filthy, FILTHY Other Midi-chlorian Colonies trying to encroach upon THEIR resources. Get! GET!

Which is where? All past attempts have FAILED. Because they? Had an END GOAL first, and they worked their way backwards. Approached it all with either preconceived notions or complete derision of the subject matter. Ignoring countless culture's collective MILLENNIUMS of knowledge on the subject. The observations. The notes. The folk remedies and early sciences.

Arrogant. Forgetting or outright dismissing. Because THEY were better. THEY were SMARTER. Surely, THEY would crack the code! Unlock the SECRETS of this MYSTICAL building block of the Force!

Achieve... POWER.

But? The thing IS? Primitive? Does not and HAS not? Ever meant stupid. It means young. New. Doctors and scientists, doing the best they could, with what they had. To help as many as they could. The Force? It was a mysterious thing. They knew the shape of it. The edges, but not it's depths. They could observe.

If they did X... Y occurred. Medicine A? Brought about B and C side effects, avoid it going forward. Use Medicine D. So forth and so on. Building upon the knowledge of the past.

But OH, THEY? Didn't have fancy modern medical technology! Didn't know the modern terms! So obviously they were superstitious idiots!

Thus, attempt after attempt. Failed. Usually with innocent people, paying the price. Because Power. Because Fame. Because they could rule the galaxy and go down in history books... if only these simple little bacteria would COOPERATE. But.... they don't. Do they?

Because you lack understanding.

You. Can Not. Remove Them. From The. HOST.

They DIE.

They can exsist in exactly ONE(1) environment. Their NATIVE environment. Where you found them? That's where they need to STAY. If you found them in a tree? The need to stay in THAT specific tree. Dirt? Well then! Dirt from THAT specific region of THAT specific PLANET. No moving! Cease! Desist!

Are the Midi-chlorians in a baby? The start up strains were donated! Congrats! THEY LIVE THERE NOW. They are now NATIVE to the BABY. Can not exsist OUTSIDE the baby! In fact, will immediately begin to die! Outside that baby!

This is WHY Sith Alchemy is so fucked up. Lots of live experimentation and forcing Midi-chlorians into statis. Body horror everywhere. No mas! It DOES NOT SPARK JOY.

Which?! That leads me to my point! The part of all this THAT FUCKING HAUNTS ME!!!

Bacteria can be multiplied if you give it the right food. Fuck, it WANTS to multiple. WANTS to go gangbusters. Just? Absolutely apeshit. Thick enough in the blood to turn it all into PASTE. It doesn't have a brain. It can't look around and think to itself "hey, maybe we should slow down, we're straining the environment".

It's bacteria. Ultimately, in the end, JUST Bacteria.

Yes, it may be the medium by which we connect to The Force... but IT itself? Has no intelligence to negotiate with. Just like the cells in your body. And JUST like the cells in your body? It can be a cancer. Could kill you, if something went wrong.

If SOMEONE, deliberately, made things go wrong.

All in the name of "Science".

Yes, once again, I consider the SI-OC, even as I consider Midi-chlorians themselves. What "feeds" such a bacteria? A healthy body, presumably. Connection to the Force? Kyber, most likely. Force powerful items. We know they "call" to those who are Sensitive. But! As we know? The part of your body that can actually FEEL that call? Is the Midi-chlorians in your blood, which then transfers the information to it's host.

It is the Midi-chlorians that want that specific Force object. In all likelihood, because it benefits them. That it benefits you? Is a lovely side effect. That is can be used for things? Neat! Good on you for figuring that out! It would still call you to collect pretty, shining, rocks, even if you couldn't use Kyber for SHIT. You would be COMPELLED.

NEED it.

It makes the Midi-chlorians inside you go Brrrrr. Mmm, yes, happy chemicals. Positive reinforcement! You should continue to do OTHER things that help the Midi-chlorians! Like meditation, eating well, and being around others! Go on! Hug that baby! Yeeeeeah, good energy makes LOTS of Midi-chlorian food! (Bad energy too. We are not picky. But that Does Not Feel Nice. So like.... why tho?)

So! Consider!

You have yourself an UNETHICAL AF scientist. The Board does NOT UNDERSTAND THEIR GENIUS etc etc. They have completely lost their shit. Unfortunately, they have money. And Slavery and desperation abound. There are ugly, UGLY pockets of darkness in this galaxy.

They? Have An Idea™! (It is a terrible, horrifying idea)

This scientist? Is going to crack the Secrets of The Midi-chlorian! Become Famous! It is a plot heard many times before, sadly. Just as sadly? SI-OC's parents, who were on their way to the temple, never make it there. Make no mistake! Good people. Upset, of course, that they will be losing their daughter. But? As all good parents do?

They made the decision they thought was best for their baby girl. A lifetime of being understood. Supported. Of stable food and safe beds. A good, quality education they would never be able to afford. Being able to help people someday. They love their daughter. Weep for losing her. But sometimes? Loving your child? Means letting them go.

Not forgotten. NEVER forgotten. But somewhere better then they could ever give her. Safe from those who would see their child in chains.

They do not make it.

But they do not go quietly. When those bastards come for their little girl. They make it cost dearly. Not dearly enough. Never, ever, enough. But one of the other passengers is able to get off the emergency beacon. So the Jedi will know. They will come.

It... it has to be... enough...

And it is.

And they do.

But it is not just a pirate attack. Not JUST slavers. No... no this is far more horrifying. Far worse indeed. The Shadow sent to rescue the child? Stumbles into a festering shitshow. The sort that takes a TEAM to unravel. The not-pirates are mercenaries, are closing in fast. He send his data in full, in one big lump as an emergency download.

Capture likely eminent. They're experimenting on Force Sensitives. Need Back Up.

Help.

The Doctor is, of course, DELIGHTED! An adult specimen AND a child! Comparisons and contrasts! They ramble on, unhinged, to the horror of the Shadow. Who's eyes are locked on the Crecheling in a cage. He knows help will come... but will it come fast enough?

No. Not really.

But what keeps HIM from falling? Is the Crecheling that needs to be taught. Ironic, in a way, that the very thing their capture demands and demands? Is what helps them escape, however temporarily, their cages. Meditate. They are told. Or else.

Surrounded by stolen artifacts of Light.

Meditate.

Meditate.

Imagine, if you will, a dialysis machine. It filters the blood, yes? Pumps it outside the body? A terrible process. Trial and error. How far is too far? At what distance, do the midi-chlorians begin to die? The doctor kills... so, SO many innocent. Not their prize specimens. Jedi are hard to get! But slaves? Easy enough.

The Shadow can not Fall, he reminds himself. Can not give in to his grief or rage. His horror, his sorrow. It... it is so hard. To remember the Light. In this dark place. But the Crechling helps. The kyber, the artifacts. When... not... Not IF! But WHEN he gets out of here? He thinks... he thinks he should retire. Being a Creche Master sounds lovely, to be honest.

Bright. Peaceful.

The doctor completes their horror machine. He can not stop them from putting on SI-OC. After all... HE is done growing. It filters the blood, you see. Nice and close to the body. Through and around Force rich materials, in medical grade tubing. Exposing the Midi-chlorians directly to the energy they feed off of. Filter in a mineral solution to use as building blocks.

It WORKS.

The midi-chlorians in SI-OC blood start multiplying far faster and too far greater concentration then ever before. Slowly but surely boosting their Force Sensitivity as they go. What a rousing success.

If it weren't slowly killing SI-OC.

Ever imagine? What would happen if someone reached over and slowly started turning up the sensitivity on your eyesight? Your hearing? Your taste, touch, the FEELING OF YOUR BONES? If every breath was sandpaper, and every thought an adrenaline rush?

Could you imagine? FEELING the galaxy BREATHE? Knowing for a fact that your body had been specially designed for a certain level of sensitivity? And you had been broken? Because someone wanted to see if you could handle HIGHER?

Power without the support structure? Burns everything down.

Just because something CAN be done? Doesn't mean it will work the way you fantasize it will. Reality is not a story book. Where Power comes in pretty little packages, to be bought or sold or stolen. Midi-chlorians were always Bacteria. And trying to fuck with your own micro-biomes for more power? Was always destined to end in death and disease.

For you. For someone else. For every innocent you dragged into it.

They scoffed at the "primitive" scholars who warned not to fuck with it, yet still treat it like its a mystical power to be seized.

The Shadows that finally track down the lab? BURN it wil a VENGEANCE. It is a place of horrors. And initiate SI-OC is very, VERY sick. They aren't even sure they can risk taking her to Coruscant. Too many people. Jedha? Probably safer. Luckily their library has something that...? MIGHT? Be able to help treat this?

SI-OC probably never stops Tasting Time™ and seeing the Pretty Colors™ but? At least she becomes? Largely functional? Probably needs a disability animal. One that's mildly force sensitive, so it knows when she's ~~drifting~~ again. Keep her from walking into traffic or off a landing platform.

The random bouts of prophecy and mind reading are a bit disconcerting, but like? Lay off! It's not SI-OC fault! Be nice! She can't help it! Don't be rude! D:< she basicly has tiny Force Nexus in HER BLOOD. So WHAT if she occasionally stops to admire a sunrise that hasn't existed for thousands of years? It's probably pretty!

The younglings? Very understanding. Adults are a bit creeped out. But like? Eh. Just EXTRA Jedi-y Jedi... they guess? (No, no not really. This one had a serious Force Incident. But like FUCK we're breaking rank to tell outsiders that sooooo..... Sure? Yeah. Let's go with that!)

Ironically? I bet? Anikin gets along great with her? They're team "WHY YES, THE FORCE IS VERY LOUD. WHY ARE WE SHOUTING? SO YOU CAN HEAR US! OVER THE FORCE! WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT'S NOT THAT LOU-?". He got it naturally, she got it by getting fucked over. But? They can both go?

"Hey, you feel that thingy in the-?" *vague hand motion* and get a "oh YEAH! Wonder what's THAT'S about?". Does anyone else feel it? No. Is it obvious to THEM? Yes.

Will Anikin punch your lights out, if you mock his disabled friend? *boss music starts playing* R U N. Padme would help. Tag team, fuckeeeeer! *from the highbar with a steel chair*

Community is EVERYTHING. And sometimes? It's you, your secret wife, your brother-mentor-dad, the Clone army you adopted, and the perpetually Force High/Vaguely Brain Damaged jedi you call your best friend! And the droids. And your secret wife's body gaurd squad. And the younglings your friend-... actually? You know what? Your family's kinda big.

Awesome :)

@legitimatesatanspawn @babbling-babull @spidori @hdgnj @hypewinter @leftnotright @the-witchhunter @lolottes @mayfay

[gi4hao]

a story of garden parties

neighbor!seungcheol x gn!reader

warnings: a vaguely implied mention of alcohol, lots of mentions of food, cheol taking his shirt off *bites lip*

your neighbor’s friends warned you: they’re often around. but that only means seungcheol always has room for one more person, especially if that person happens to be you.

march 24th, 11:41am

it’s the very last thing on your to-do list. something you only allowed yourself to do after cleaning your entire house and unpacking exactly thirteen full cardboard boxes: changing the nameplate on your mailbox. proudly admiring the way your family name states that this is, indeed, a house that now belongs to you, you feel a great sense of accomplishment rushing through your veins. of course you’re far from being done with moving in, but you have a feeling everything will go easy now that the hardships of paperwork are behind you.

on your right, the sound of footsteps and friendly chatters make you look away from your brand new mailbox. you count not one, not two, not even three people walking towards you, but seven. for a moment you wonder whether your neighborhood is something worthy of touristic visits… but watching these guys closely, you realize they’re all carrying food and drinks of various kinds, therefore eliminating the tourist theory.

you greet the group with a polite smile, and the seven of them utter scattered heys and hellos. only one of them actually speaks up:

“hi! are you the new tenant?”

“i am, yeah! i just moved in today. are you guys… neighbors of mine?”

they’re quick to inform you that none of them is actually living in this neighborhood, but that they’re all headed to your actual neighbor’s house, making the most of the sun to have a little get-together. a barbecue, specifically.

you’ve met your neighbor already, although only through hurried exchanges during your two visits of the place. he seemed like a nice guy, although you couldn’t quite remember right now.

“well, don’t hesitate to come and say hi! my name’s seungkwan, you might see us a lot around here if i’m being honest”, the same guy tells you, and you think they all must be pretty close to invite other people to each other’s houses.

may 20th, 1:30pm

“thanks!” you tell seungcheol as he hands you the drink you’ve been advised to try for months now, a creation straight out of joshua’s mind.

and indeed, you understand what the hype is about from the very first sip. you face translates your satisfaction, and causes seungcheol to crack you a smile.

“i needed that”, you admit, putting the glass down on the kitchen table. through the patio door, you get a perfect view of jeonghan trying his hardest to push mingyu in the pool. “thank you for inviting me by the way, it’s always nice to hang out with you guys.”

this is probably a more acceptable thing to say than the actual truth: that the main reason why you accepted the invitation was seungcheol himself.

“no worries, we like having you around”, he replies, getting started on his own drink. “is everything okay though? you seem a bit tensed.”

well, so much for trying your best not to look like you haven’t spent your entire morning having a breakdown over a multitude of sudden bad news.

you’ve gotten closer to seungcheol lately. the sunny weather brought many occasions for spontaneous conversations in your driveway, a few drinks at each other’s houses when the timing seemed right, and even a couple of parties. in other terms, you’re close enough to tell him when you’re feeling down, but maybe not close enough to always tell him why.

still, he’s always listened to you with a patient and reliable ear, making sure your interactions always felt comfortable for the both of you. but this sense of comfort is precisely the reason why neither of you seem willing to make a move.

you take another sip of your drink before answering: “i’m okay, nothing my beautiful new kitchen lights can’t fix.”

he chuckles, knowing you’re referring to the latest thing he’s done for you around your house. and his cheeks feel unusually hot. “well, feel free to ask if you ever need anything else. i don’t mind at all”, he smiles before walking around the kitchen table, motioning you to follow him outside.

your drink in hand as you step onto his wooden patio, you have to make a conscious effort to look away when he lifts his t-shirt over his head. lying on their deckchairs, minghao and jihoon are sharing knowing looks behind your back.

august 6th, 11:56pm

“am i even doing this right?” you ask, not really knowing whether you’re talking to yourself or not.

two hands come to rest on your shoulders, and you feel cheol leaving a kiss on the back of your head, making you instantly melt. “looks perfect to me”, he answers, looking at the chicken and vegetables sizzling on the grill.

you would take that as a compliment if it had come from anyone else, but since cheol has a tendency to believe that everything you do is perfection, you’re not really sure how much truth is behind those words.

so you pick up a slice of bell pepper with your fork, blow on it and turn around to feed it to him.

“perfect”, he confirms with a content smile, before leaning in to leave a kiss on your cheek.

behind him, you catch sight of seungkwan frowning in disgust: “don’t spread your cheesiness all over our food please. what if it’s contagious?”

reacting much quicker than you, cheol throws a towel that hits him right in the chest, all while simultaneously telling him to start handing around the plates.

“wow, someone doesn’t like to be called cheesy…”, you remark in an amused tone as you bring the first batch of food on the table.

“is it cheesy to say you’re the only one who’s allowed to say it?” he questions and pulls you closer for a kiss, fully knowing the answer to his own question.

sure, you guys might be a bit cheesy, but if you were to come up with an explanation, you’d say it’s just the natural release of months of pent-up affection. but everything feels so right now, and you can’t even remember the last time you felt alone, cheol’s presence and sturdiness being your safety net at every inconvenience in your life.

and as much as seungkwan and the others love to tease you for it, they’ll always cherish your fondness for each other, as long as it keeps on making their best friend the happiest man ever.

[firestorm09890]

it’s still very much a crack theory but if people are earnestly believing Demyx is the Master of Masters, why shouldn’t I lean into this one? anyway don’t take this very seriously

okay so

those lines from Ienzo’s character file where he says his childhood was extremely hazy, but his memories of Radiant Garden are perfectly vivid- ignoring how concerning it is that he considered his childhood over by the time he was in Radiant Garden, what you could take away from it is that he was from somewhere else before Radiant Garden that he barely remembers. I don’t think it’s just childhood amnesia (real term referring to how adults have a hard time recalling early memories) especially since Ienzo remembers his time in Radiant Garden perfectly clearly, it’s like a hard cutoff. Either way the implication he’s from somewhere else remains

And I'm willing to believe they'd put relevant lore hints in the character files because they DID do that for Demyx

Oh yeah, what is it that person used to say all the time? Something about a guiding key? Come to think of it, wasn't something guiding me?

anyway we know that traveling to a different world and a different time and losing your memories is a thing that can happen, thanks to khux. I don’t think Ienzo used an ark though, that’s been done already

Radiant Garden has some kind of connection to Daybreak Town, thanks to it also having arks, and a connection to Scala Ad Caelum, bc of the researcher attire staying the same, but we don’t know how. I’ve seen people theorize that RG is like a sister world to Scala, or the next step in the history of the same place, so RG is built on Scala which is built on Daybreak Town.

so here’s my shot in the dark that I’m choosing to believe until we actually get lore on how Radiant Garden is connected to those places: Missing Link era Scala had its apocalypse and somehow split into Dark Road era Scala and Radiant Garden (hey wait they’re both surrounded by water… curious), with the history of Missing Link being erased in both worlds. Ienzo was from ML Scala and… idk hid somewhere he shouldn’t have or something and he woke up way in the future in Radiant Garden and he didn’t get the Subject X treatment because 1) they found him before Xehanort was there and 2) he didn’t even tell them he couldn’t remember things. they just accepted that he wouldn’t want to talk about his past, he’s just a little kid who lost his parents

I’m calling it the Victorian Orphan Theory. and yes that is why I picked ML Scala, because Victorian Orphan Ienzo being REAL would be awesome

[corroded-hellfire]

Pretty Girl - Eddie Munson x Reader

Note: This is for my darling @munson-blurbs 💚 I told her that if she finished the big project she was working on in time, I would write her anything she wanted. Not only did she finish on time, but she did it damn near perfectly. I am so unbelievably proud of you, Bug. I’m always in awe of your intelligence and work ethic. I hope I did justice to what you wanted, and I hope you all enjoy it as well! Also, I hope that I used the academic terms I included correctly, but if I didn’t, we’re just going to ignore that lol

Request/Summary: Eddie × Bookworm!Reader where Reader is stressed because of a massive project she has to do. And she keeps talking about all of this academic stuff that makes Eddie's head spin. So he does what he does best: fucks his smart girl until she's dumb

Warnings: smut, p in v, unprotected (wrap it up), oral f!receiving, slight daddy kink

Words: 2.4k

Eddie’s just hanging up the phone as you step into your shared apartment after a long day on campus. Letting out a huff, you drop your backpack down on the kitchen table, and books and papers come spilling out.

“Ugh,” you groan, running your hands down your face. Eddie frowns and walks over to the table as you slump down into a chair. 

“What’s wrong, sweetheart?” he asks as he takes the seat across from you. 

With a sigh, you shake your head. “S’nothing.” Eddie raises an eyebrow and tilts his head. You can practically hear him asking if you really expect him to believe that. “Just school bullshit. You’d think people studying for their doctorate would be a little more serious than some people in my class. But you don’t want to hear me ramble on.”

“Uh, yes, I do,” Eddie says, leaning forward on the table. “You know I think it’s sexy when you talk all academic. My girl’s gonna have her PhD.”

The salacious wiggling of his eyebrows has you cracking a smile. Relenting, you sit up in your seat and begin to tell Eddie about the irritants you’ve been dealing with.

“So, we have to utilize these things called literacy based behavior interventions…”

Eddie rests his chin on his fist as he listens to you. He’s picked up a lot over the years and is able to identify so many more words that you say than he used to. Sometimes though, he still gets a little confused.

“Well, then that brought us to the Social Identity Development Theory…”

Nodding, Eddie is almost positive he knows what that is, but he doesn’t want to interrupt you to double check. 

“But after all this, he admits he doesn’t really understand qualitative vs. quantitative methodology! I have absolutely no idea how this man even became a BCABA.”

I know this one, Eddie thinks to himself. Board Certified Assistant Behavior Analyst.

“Then he kept saying ‘phenomenology’ instead of ‘pedagogy.’”

Now those, Eddie did not know. He can see you getting more riled up though, so he knows it’s time to intervene.

“Baby, baby, hey.” He reaches over and tugs on your hand, nodding for you to come over and sit in his lap. “It’s okay, you just need to relax.”

Reluctantly, you push yourself out of your chair and let Eddie pull you on top of him. The way he smirks up at you lets you know he’s about to get frisky even before his large hands slide up your thighs. Rough, calloused fingers dig into the plush of your denim covered legs. 

“I think my smart girl needs me to take care of her, doesn’t she?” Eddie pouts up at you. When you nod in return, your boyfriend removes one hand from you and brings it back down to deliver a harsh smack to your ass. “Use your words, baby.”

A whimper escapes your throat as you tighten your legs around his hips. “Yes, Eddie. Need you. Make me feel better.”

Tightening his grip on you, Eddie stands up from the chair. A squeal escapes you as you tightly wrap your arms around his neck. A smirk of satisfaction on his lips, he carries you into your shared bedroom. Gently, he lays you down and lets you get comfortable before he’s crawling on top of you. Eddie tugs on the hem of your shirt, and you sit up enough for him to slide it off of you. Then he works down your body, taking off every piece of clothing in his path. Moving back up your body, he goes to press kisses against your neck, but you stop him with a yank on his own shirt.

“Me too?” he asks with a chuckle. 

“Yes.” The adorable pout in your voice has Eddie acquiescing, stripping down so he’s just as naked as you are. 

“May I continue?” After letting your eyes slowly roam up and down his bare body, you give him a nod of approval. 

“You may.”

He chuckles and leans in and presses his lips against the juncture where your neck and shoulder meet. The kisses start off soft and sweet but turn wetter and needier as he moves down to your collar bones. Moving further down your body, he attaches his lips to the underside of your breast. It’s his favorite place to leave hickies on you and from the way his mouth is moving against the sensitive skin, you’re sure that’s what he’s doing now. 

As the first moans tumble out of your mouth, Eddie switches breasts to give the other one the same attention. Your hands tangle in the curls that are splayed out over your naked chest, your fingers coming up to scratch at Eddie’s scalp as he continues his journey down your body. His kisses trail down your stomach, to your belly button, then further and further down until he stops just shy of where you most want his mouth. 

“So needy,” Eddie says with a chuckle as your hips begin to move, looking for some sort of friction. You let out a whine and give a tug to Eddie’s hair. A guttural groan sounds deep in his throat. “Playing dirty, huh?”

“Need you so bad, Eddie,” you say through a whimper. The way you look down at him with wide, imploring eyes has his cock twitching between his body and the mattress. 

“Relax, my beautiful little genius. I’m gonna help you feel better.”

You’re not given a chance to respond as Eddie moves down and wraps his lips around your clit. One of your hands comes out of Eddie’s hair to grip the sheet you’re lying on.

“Fuck,” you moan. 

Eddie’s tongue expertly works over your clit, moving at the speed and pressure that he knows drives you wild. Using his hands to spread your legs even wider for him, he nudges his nose against your sensitive nub as he licks at your entrance.

“Jesus, baby, I’ll never get used to how fucking good you taste.” It’s not unusual for Eddie to take his time when he’s going down on you. He likes to ravish you, gathering every last drop from you that he can. The only reason he pulls away from your sopping pussy is to praise you on how sweet you taste or how wet you are for him. 

Now, Eddie’s taking even more care than normal to make sure you’re feeling good. Lazy strokes of his tongue over your clit pairs with him slipping two fingers into you. The moment he curves them up inside of you, he’s hitting that delicious spot that has you seeing stars. There are few things Eddie knows better than your body—it’s the only thing he’s ever actually enjoyed studying. He knows it as well as he knows his own body and is able to bring you to the brink on his terms and in his time. 

“M’close, Eddie.”

He knows without you telling him, though. You both know that. The way your walls clamp down around his fingers, the way your breaths hitch as you lose yourself in the feeling. With one last rub of his fingers against your inner wall, the wave of pleasure crashes over you and has you whining out your boyfriend’s name over and over again. 

“That’s a good girl,” Eddie coos as he works you through your bliss. As your moans subside, he slips his fingers out of your pussy and pops them into his mouth. “Mm, fuck, baby.”

“Eddie,” you whine, trying to catch your breath.

“What, my princess?” He crawls up your body and presses gentle, barely-there kisses along the column of your throat. “You already cock drunk? I haven’t even been inside you yet, sweetheart.”

“Y’make me feel so good.” Your hands reach up, grabbing at any expanse of Eddie’s pale skin that you can.

“I’m here, baby,” he assures you, bringing a hand up to cup your cheek.

“Wanna feel you.”

“Aw, does my pretty girl want my PhD?” Eddie teases with a smirk. “My pretty huge dick?” Before you have time to respond, he leans down and slots his mouth over yours, immediately licking into your mouth. Using his other hand, Eddie lines himself up with your entrance and slowly pushes inside.

Eddie’s mouth swallows your moans as you feel him stretch you out deliciously. Above you, your boyfriend meets your sounds of pleasure with his own at the feeling of sliding into the wet warmth of your pussy.

“Shit,” Eddie mumbles against your mouth. “So fucking tight. This is all you needed, right baby? Just needed your daddy taking care of you.”

Words seem too hard as Eddie pulls his hips back before thrusting back into you again and again. You’re dissolved to whining and whimpering in response to his question, which has him smirking down at you. 

“Mm, look at that,” Eddie muses as he grips your hip. “I may not be a genius like you, baby, but this I’m pretty good at. Fuck my smart girl ‘til she’s dumb.” Not only does Eddie know what to do to your body, but he knows just the words to say to get you hurtling towards another orgasm. 

Every generous inch of Eddie moves inside of you, the ridge between the head and shaft dragging against all the spots that have you arching your back. A strong hand slides up from your hip, making sure to caress every inch of skin it comes across as it makes its way up to your mouth. 

“Open up.”

Immediately, you do as you’re told, and Eddie slips two fingers into your mouth. Not needing to be told what to do with them, you begin to run your tongue around his fingers, swirling it around the tip as you soak the digits.

“God damn it,” Eddie says with a huff of laughter. “You’re gonna make me cum before I want to. Gotta get my girl off again, first.”

A small smirk on your face, you release his fingers with a pop. He reaches down and rubs his fingers over your clit, eliciting a breathy moan from your lips.  

“That feel good, baby?” Eddie goads.

“Y-Yes,” you stutter, your eyes closing in ecstasy. 

“Want you to cum for me again, my good girl. Think you can do that?”

“Yeah,” you breathe out. “So close.”

“Cum on my cock, baby. Want you to make such a mess of me. Cream my cock.”

“Fuck,” you groan, fingers digging into Eddie’s back as his thrusts become sloppier, a tell-tale sign he’s close as well. “Want you to cum too, Eddie.”

“Oh, don’t worry, princess,” he says with a laugh. “‘Bout to cum so hard in your pretty little pussy. Gonna fill you up so, so good. You’ll feel me dripping out of you for days.”

“Shit,” you hiss, and Eddie picks up the pace on your clit. “Fuck—E-Eddie, I’m gonna cum. Fuck, I’m coming.”

The clenching of your walls around his cock has Eddie losing his composure, groans and mutterings of your name falling from his tongue. 

“Shit, baby—m-me too.”

Your bodies move together as the two of you ride out your highs with each other. Eddie’s head drops down and buries into your neck as his body stills on top of yours. Reluctant to pull out of you, Eddie busies himself by pressing sweet kisses against your skin.

“How was that, my love?” Eddie whispers against your ear.

“Was perfect,” you tell him, a lazy smile on your face. “Don’t want you to move.”

Eddie chuckles. “Me neither. But I was thinking we could get all comfy and I’ll hold you as close as you want me to.”

“Can’t get much closer than we are now,” you point out, making Eddie laugh again. 

“Good point. I’m gonna get us cleaned up though, okay?”

Eddie forces himself to get out of the bed and brings back a warm washcloth. Gently, Eddie cleans you up before working on himself. He leaves the room to throw the washcloth in the hamper, but you figure he gets sidetracked because he takes longer than expected. When you see him balancing a bowl of popcorn and two bottles of water as he walks back into the room, you see why. He sets the snack down on the bed and rolls one of the water bottles your way.

“I was thinking,” he says, turning his back to you and walking over to the television resting on your dresser. “We should watch a movie.” It seems like he already had one in mind as he plucks one from your small pile of VHS tapes. Eddie pops the tape into the VCR and strolls back over to the bed. He holds the popcorn bowl so he doesn’t knock it over while he gets situated. As soon as he lifts his arm, you’re cuddling up into his side. Sweat sticks to both of you even after you’ve cleaned up, but you tuck yourself into Eddie’s side regardless. He places the bowl of popcorn on his thigh closest to you as you rest your head on his shoulder. The familiar sweet scent of your strawberry shampoo brings a smile to his face and a feeling of warmth and comfort settles over him. 

“Oh, you put Tommy Boy on!” Your face lights up in glee as you point to the television, as if he didn’t know that you were referring to the movie on the screen. 

“I know how much you love it,” he says, a smile on his face at how happy it made you. 

Cuddling up to his side, Eddie grabs a few pieces of popcorn and holds them up to your mouth. Giggling, you eat them out of his hand like a horse being fed hay. The two of you lazily feed pieces to one another as you watch the movie. When the bowl is empty, you nuzzle your face into Eddie’s neck. The smell of sweat, weed, and his minty shampoo floods your senses and has you more relaxed than you’ve felt in days. Only a few minutes later, Eddie can feel your breath against his neck as it comes out in long puffs. A smile grows on his face at the realization that you’ve fallen asleep.

Carefully, Eddie moves the empty bowl of popcorn to the bedside table and slowly maneuvers himself so he's laying down, keeping you held in his arms. He pulls your body as close as he can, keeping his promise of holding you as closely as you’d like.

“Goodnight, pretty girl. I love you.”

[petermorwood]

Microwave Sponge Cake (eventually)

Long ago, @dduane and I had a Whirlpool combi microwave - micro, grill, fan oven - and It Was Great, big enough to use as a proper oven when what needed cooked in a proper oven was small enough that powering up the big proper oven in the cooker was a bit much.

Still with me...?

IIRC it was one of those Christmas presents where Mum, ever-practical, told us; "get yourselves something really useful but not too expensive (I did say practical!) and I'll go halves."

In 2016, after something like 15 years of pretty-well daily use for one thing and another, the old thing expired by stages, micro first, grill second, oven last - it made great bread up until the end - and went to recycling heaven.

*****

We couldn't find a one-for-one replacement (we needed a free-standing counter-top appliance, everyone was selling built-in), so until once was available (optimism) we bought an ordinary microwave.

NB, this and its successors were only used for ordinary microwave things like reheating, defrosting and dealing with freeze-cook stuff. They got nothing like the amount of use of the old combi, mostly because of being incapable of doing a lot of it. As things turned out, this didn't help much.

About eighteen months later, we had to buy another. If a microwave's enamel interior develops a crack (to this day I don't know how), moisture gets in, rust begins and the enamel pulls off the bare metal. That's when you get "sparking".

This demo is deliberate; believe me, when it's unexpected it's even worse.

A private welder show or lightning storm at the end of the kitchen counter when all you want is a hot cuppa is distinctly unsettling. Also, it's only going to get worse, and we could imagine - boy, could we - what "Much Worse" might look like.

To the recycle dump!

(NB, micros with stainless steel interiors don't seem to do this, probably because they're already tuned to deal with the bare metal.)

The replacement, another ordinary micro, Just Up And Died after eighteen months and, guess what, the quote for a check-up and replacements-if-required was as much as the price of a new one.

(Inkjet printers seem to operate on this principal too.)

To the recycle dump again!

We got a third new one (which BTW is still running just fine, because it's been downgraded to Extra, read on), totalled up what we'd spent on ordinary microwaves, said a few well-chosen words about planned obsolescence and the "Vimes 'Boots' Theory of Economic Inequality" and got ourselves a pre-pay credit card whose top-ups were dedicated to Get A Combi Again.

We didn't bother with GACA baseball caps.

That would have been silly.

I don't know if these cards exist in the USA; we treat them as the modern version of a piggy-bank...

...except that to get at the money you need two people acting in accord.

*****

And in 2021 we got one.

Okay, this next bit is going to read like an ad.

It isn't, because the appliance is discontinued. (Whirlpool FINALLY do something similar but not identical.) It's just enthusiastic users discovering there's even more to a gadget than expected.

*****

The New One even bigger than the old one, which had 28 litres capacity; the new one was 33 L (was .99 ft³, is now 1.16 ft³). In non-tech terms, wow, More Room To Cook In.

Reading the figures was no help (to me, anyway) in visualising what a maw the thing had, but opening the door did that and no mistake.

I said something to DD about "bite radius"...

...and she instantly responded with "anyway, we delivered the bomb".

We're a quotesy household. ;->

BTW, The New One does a very good job on seafood, too...

*****

Since we got this, almost exactly two years ago, we've used it from reheating tea to roasting meat to making chilli / goulash / stew / curry (you can run the oven / grill separately or add simultaneous zaps of microwave for much less cooking time) to baking bread.

One of the best things about it is that when the set cooking time is done, the appliance switches off automatically. No risk of busyness, absent-mindedness or out-in-the-garden-ness ending in clouds of smoke, ruined food and possibly even worse.

As for breadmaking, it has a dough-rise setting which is a Time Machine, reducing a two-hour "doubled in size" rise time to about 35-45 minutes...

It also has the most reliable Defrost Butter setting either of us have ever encountered, turning a rock-solid butter brick from the freezer into something spreadable while never - to date - doing the "never mind a butter-knife, give me a spoon or a paintbrush" thing.

*****

However...

There's also a "Chef Setting" where there are some simple recipes. Here's the pastry page.

Basically, you assemble and mix the ingredients, input the correct settings and the machine does all the timing, heating and cooking.

We'd never used this until yesterday, when DD said, "Let's try the sponge cake..."

Yes, this post was entitled "Microwave Sponge Cake (eventually)..." and here we are...

We did all the measuring correctly and checked it by pouring the mixture into a baking container while on the scale, wondering betimes why the recipe says 900g, the ingredients total 925 and what actually poured into the container reads 906... Weird. Really weird.

Then we put the container into the oven, entered the correct code, and let things do what they were going to do.

A little later we discovered something else about the recipe besides a weight anomaly.

It didn't mention the required size of the container. Or or how much the mixture was likely to rise.

It rose...

Let's say more than we expected...

The fluted ceramic container used for baking this one makes it look like a Vesuvius cupcake; not quite a pyroclastic flow, but a lot of flow regardless.

Once it cooled we separated the sponge-cake from the escaped sponge in the same way as sculptors work with wood or marble - "Chip away everything that doesn't look like a cake" - and found that despite its misshapen looks, it tasted pretty good.

So today DD made another, this time using a larger container.

...and this time it stayed put until removed using the cunning base-and-lifting-straps of baking parchment.

It's not the loftiest or best-risen sponge cake either of us have ever seen (a smaller-diameter higher-sided container would probably deal with that) BUT if there's something needing sponge cake in a hurry - this went from cupboard ingredients to done and cooling in less than 55 minutes - that treatment seems to fit the bill.

We're now wondering what other secrets lurk in the simple recipe pages; falafel, quiche Lorraine, stuffed peppers, even Flammkuchen* from scratch.

(*Though I have my own views about Flammkuchen, mostly involving a plane flight...)

And we'll be paying a lot more attention to what size of dish we put them in. :->

[thekinglemingle]

Have I ever discussed my only semi-crack theory that Adolin and Maya are going to form a reverse Nahel bond.

I think Sanderson knows that making Adolin a Radiant would be a mistake. The whole point of his character is that in a family of amazing people, he is just Ken. Similarly RoW stresses the importance of Maya's decision to forsake the original Knight's Radiant. This hurt her deeply, but she still thinks it was the right decision.

It would betray both Adolin and Maya's character arcs to have Adolin become a Radiant with Maya as his spren. But on the other hand, there clearly is a bond between them forming, this was how Maya was able to speak in RoW, and both their character arcs need to go somewhere.

Throughout Stormlight, we are repeatedly shown that this new version of the Knight's Radiant is not falling into the same structures and rules of the old one. Lift uses Cultivation's investiture rather than stormlight. The Skybreakers are no longer allied with the other orders. The Lightspren are bonding Listeners rather than humans. And Renarin demonstrates that Nahel bonds are possible that put you outside the 10 traditional orders.

What do we actually know about the Nahel bond?

The Nahel Bond allows a cognitive being to maintain their mind while manifesting in the physical realm

The Nahel Bond requires cracks in a spirit web, which it fills with the ability to utilise investiture

Has it ever been stated in canon that the bond has to be between a physical being and spren? I think not. In fact while researching this post, I found this WOB, stating that a Spren could bond with another Spren.

There is a tendency to assume that the relationship works in terms of "Spren get anchored in the physical realm and in return humans get surgebinding" but it's not actually reciprocal like that. Neither side is giving these abilities to the other, they are a natural side effect of the bond. Syl can't control when and how Kaladin gets his powers, it's based on how closely their goals are aligned and she can't use them without him. And the hypothetical spren-spren bond demonstrates that giving a human/listener powers is not a requirement of a bond.

My theory is that the bond forming between Adolin and Maya will go in the opposite direction to the ones seen elsewhere in the Cosmere, filling the cracks in a Spren's spirit web rather than a human's. I don't have a clue about what this will mean for the two of them.

Will Maya get new abilities as a result of this? I suspect so

Will they be weird and warped versions of the normal Edgedancer powers in the same way that Renarin has distorted Truthwatcher powers? I expect so

How will this affect Adolin? Not a clue. Though the idea that Maya could summon him as a blade in the cognitive realm is too hilarious not to consider. And there's something oddly fitting in the idea that he loved swords so much he became one.

[disgr-aced]

"I never touched a code"

Okay so we're all assuming codeflippa is responsible for the corruption qslime is going through. But. But but but.

qslime never knowingly touched a code. But yknow who did? Yknow who did very much did, and who also died to a code?

Gegg.

(no nonono wait stay with me for my completely legimate and not at all fever-dream-fulled theory)

I'm just throwing it out there that having an entity like that live in your body, take it over, gradually force control, and then die might have some longer term effects that we're only now starting to see.

Buckle in, we're entering crack theory territory.

It was glitchy, but right at the end of the Monday stream, I think qslime said there was something rotting inside of him. And that's such an interesting choice of words because that's what dead things do - rot. That's what corpses do.

Now, qslime isn't dead. That's not what I mean. But if Gegg was truly alive (he was) and had two little egg lives (he did), and truly died at the election dinner (perhaps), that means he died using qslime's body. A body that is still around, alive, but perhaps still holding a part of it that used to be Gegg, a part that is now dead. Rotting.

(Also it hasn't passed me by that twice now a Gegg has been killed in front of qslime, and both times he's said (in a panic) something like "no wait stop, he's a part of me". More death, more of his body dying.)

And his body can't deal with that, it can't reconcile the two completely true but mutually exclusive facts that qslime is alive, and qslime is dead. It's a paradox. An impossibility. A glitch, which if ran in a computer script would throw an error but this isn't a script, this is a living breathing person.

His cells are being given two instructions: you are alive, and you are dead. And because they physically can't be both, they do a secret third thing and glitch out.

The slime bits of his body have been the first to glitch. And we know that Gegg was a very slimy little boy. So it makes sense for these bits, the bits that composed Gegg, were the first to corrupt.

That's it. That's all my thoughts on the matter. Codeflippa apologists here's how we can still win. Goodnight.

[bonzos-number-1-fan]

What R# Means: The ABC's of Fear.

The grading system used by the OIAR is one of TMAGP's more central mysteries. The show is rife with administrative work that's obfuscated even to the employees that assign each case's rating.

I have my own theory about DPHW that I think is proving more and more likely each episode, but as of yet I don't think a comprehensive theory on CAT# or R# has been given. CAT# is still proving a hard to crack but I now think I can take a strong stab at the meaning behind R#.

Spoilers for TMAGP 1-7 below the cut.

For the people who aren't keeping close track of this I'll break down how those terms are used. Each incident the OIAR assesses is assigned a case number in the following format CAT#R#DPHW. CAT, short for Category, is assigned a value of 1, 2, 3, or any combination of those three digits (12, 13, etc.). R, short for Rank, are graded C, BC, B, AB, A, or S (potentially AS but it's not come up). For DPHW each letter is a category itself and replaced with a digit from 0-9 for its grading. So there are 6 separate statistics that the OIAR uses to assess each incident.

If I'm correct about DPHW it's a ranking based on the qualities the incident presents. That's obviously very valuable information. Because of how CAT# is formatted we know it's likely three non-mutually exclusive facets. I had some idea about what it could be but it's proving quite tricky to nail down.

However it's R# that is the topic of today's post and it's something I've had a few ideas on before. We know can assume from its formatting it's a linear scale. C is the "worst/weakest/etc." while S is the "best/strongest/etc.". Initially, I thought that R# was simply a straight forward ranking of potency or threat. Higher the rank, spookier the incident. Very early on that seemed like a strong idea. It was quickly disproven but I then had the idea that Rank was instead the scale of the effect. Higher the rank, wider the incident. Also quickly disproven.

Now I'm thinking it's graded on how hard it is to deny an incident's supernatural nature. Simply put, an outside observer can more readily find a believable rational explanation for an incident of lower rank than of higher rank. Either via their own conviction to believe the supernatural isn't real, or based on the story the OIAR cooks up to explain it.

For that to make sense it needs to tick two boxes. It needs to be able to be pre-assigned to an incident as all CAT#R#DPHW's seem to be, and it needs to be useful information to track. As they're operating under the assumption that CAT#R#DPHW's can be pre-assigned then they're operating under the assumption that each type of incident is relatively stable. Meaning that the likelihood that it can be rationally explained is also relatively stable. Tick 1. There is also a really strong reason for the OIAR to use this as a grade. They're the Office of Incident Assessment and Response, the Response Department might be dead but it was a part of the initial plan. Grading each incident on how likely they are to cause concern should the details go public is very useful for deciding how to approach any given case. Tick 2.

It being useful is all well and good but it does also need to have some evidence so let's look at our highest ranked incident to this point: CAT23RAB2155 - Transformation (Eye) -/- Trespass. A man grew eyes over his body. That's pretty tricky to explain away as a medical mystery. On the other end of the scale we've got CAT2RC1157 - Dolls (Watching), or CAT2RC3338 -Agglomeration (Miscellany) -/- Congregation†. Just a creepy doll and some crappy antiques. I think of all the incidents the one that's the least immediate fit is CAT3C7494 - Collection (Blood) -/- Musical. Most of that incident is very easy to slot in here. "It's just a violin that has sharp strings, so what?". But it's also a violin that made some people eat some other people. However, mass hysteria events do get reported every so often IRL and do have a very long history. So in the grand scheme of things I don't think the details of the event are necessarily all that outlandish. It's really in the realms of urban legend and witch hunts than it is definitive proof of the supernatural.

With all that out the way this is the broad strokes of how I could see this breaking down. C ranks are things you can entirely write off as urban legends, freak accidents, and stress. Potentially things that might not need any covering up at all. I think the majority of events people could entirely say didn't happen will end up in C. "Of course the doll wasn't watching you, dolls aren't alive". B ranks are things that are harder to entirely discount as things that happened but are themselves still relatively easy to excuse as mundane. "Sure, the circumstances of that blogger's disappearance are strange but people go missing all the time, doesn't mean a monster did it". We don't have any A ranks but given the AB rank we do have I'd say A's are things in which no rational explanation can account for it, and as such require more extensive covering up, if it indeed happened. "Okay, maybe the supernatural is real because people don't just grow eyes like that".

As I mentioned early, an S rank does exist. We've not seen this attributed to anything in the show yet and so it might prove to be a special case. However on Klaus' sheet‡ from the ARG it's attributed to an interesting incident. A CAT1RS[No DPHW] with the note Mr. B. And, well, if you know, you know.

From Klaus' sheet we also know that the higher ranked incidents happen less often than lower ones and that idea generally tracks with what we know of TMP and TMA. The supernatural tends to be something you can explain away. It often is explained away. Incredibly overt manifestations are a rarity.

This one will be a slow burn to see if it bears out. Much like with DPHW's it's only really interesting when things go against the theory. I'm not as certain on this one as I am the DPHW theory but I do think it's got legs with our current data.

† This did also feature people who seemed to erase their physical features from your memory after you interacted with them. This isn't something I mention in the theory because it's not taken into account by the header and case number. A major flaw in the OIAR's methodology here is that all incidents are only ever one thing. So the case number is based solely on the presence of lots of miscellaneous objects, rather than the mind-wiping people carrying them.

‡I have made an incident master doc here, containing all the current cases, their CAT#'s, R#'s, DPHW's, etc. It has about as much information on each as I think is reasonable, including who narrates it, a link to its episode, and any other relevant notes, as well as headers for incidents we didn't hear. Additionally it also contains the Klaus sheet (German and English) and links to it when an incident matches. It will be updated each episode after the episode is publicly available.

[votederpycausemufins]

And here's my Evil X gemcyt design sheet thing. I already posted the Xisuma one, so check that one out too.

the whole gemcyt au got kicked off by @chrisrin so make sure to check out their stuff and all the stuff they reblogged if you haven't already.

Another version of the sheet above but with more notes on and for it is below the cut.

Alright! I had a lot of fun figuring Evil X out, probably bc of him being one of my blorbos.

Evil X has a lot of 'theories' surrounding what he is and I've seen some variations. He and X are siblings, they're X's clone, he's a glitched version of X, they're X's hels. etc etc. And so trying to figure out what to do for him.

While I already borrowed sweetest-honeybee's design in the second part of my Zed/WM gemcyt post, I didn't want to do like that and make him corrupted. I know the gemcyt stuff seems to play with corruption a little looser, but it still didn't feel right. So, I went researching and found a fun lil mix that seems to fit well.

First off, the closest thing you can get to a glitch in terms of gems is being off-color. I mean technically you glitch when you're cracked, but we're not doing that. Anyway, off-color gem Evil X, which is why there's the gem comparison. Next, the clone/hels part. I don't mention it on the sheet, but specifically, I think of this Evil X as a sort of gem experiment. No wait wait don't leave let me explain!

We saw that there were gem experiments of some type on the show. They were more fusion experiments using shards, and were experiments for the cluster (which technically don't work since they only emerged slightly before the cluster so there was no telling if they worked and if then the cluster would work). Also on the show, we're told that there's a resource problem on Homeworld which results in 'Era 2' gems like Peridot, who don't have all the abilities a normal gem would have. Also also in the show, when Steven and Lars are with the off colors on Homeworld, we see the kindergartens there. And while there are normal holes, there are also holes that overlap, as well as holes that look like there's been a chunk scooped out of them.

The analogy I could think of was like when you're making cookies. you roll out the dough, get a cookie cutter, and get all the cookies, but assuming you weren't using a square cutter, there's extra dough left between the cuts. Instead of just leaving it, usually you reroll it to cut out more cookies. Well, why can't Homeworld try the same?

Evil X is meant to be an experiment on if Homeworld can successfully do that. They scooped out extra rock from a kindergarten or two, compressed it into a new boulder, then used an injector on it. Eventually after a long while, out came Evil X. And that whole thing also leans into the clone thing because I imagine some of the scooped rock was from part of where Xisuma emerged.

Anyway, with all that, I originally thought about making Evil X look similar to Amethyst's pseudo buff reformation, but trying to draw that was a mess. I meant to go back and make him look a little more lopsided, but you'll have to just imagine that. Whoops. At the very least he has the funky stripes. I imagine that's probably from where the different rock pieces met or something, and since it wasn't as solid as regular rock, he was like that.

Coloring him was tough, but eventually I just copied Xisuma over, inverted his colors, and then shifted the hue to be more red. I considered making the green parts more black, but it didn't fit, so they're just more purpley to show that Xisuma connection or smthn.

Speaking of his gem, I show what I picture a normal Cuprite to look like. Meanwhile Evil X's is a bit misshapen, as well as that darker area that mimics the one reference I had. specifically that darker bit is chrysocolla, but he's still just cuprite.

Instead of a mask, he's just got a visor similar to what we've seen with Peridot and Doc and technically those zircons. And also instead of a mask he has those... blade things. Look, the best name i could find for them were blade gauntlets, but they look more like sword brass knuckles to me so I don't know. Also yes they are based on a weapon a digimon had, what of it?

And then, he is hella amethyst coded. Popped out of his rock thing in a chamber under the kindergarten (similar to the other experiments in the show) with no one around. He was an experiment and uses rock from different gems and is off color, so he doesn't know what he's for. Doesn't even know what diamond he should belong to, so that's why he's got a grey one on his chest. And there's a lot of little things and ideas for him that are inspired by Amethyst's characterization on the show, to the point I was planning a screenshot redraw even before I had his and Xisuma's designs even close to finalized.

I also have a fic I'm working on with him and Gemsuma, as well as that quick Jevin design plus a few teeny tiny references to other people's gem designs. If my adhd allows it, i should post that 1 shot fic tomorrow.

[rosypenguins]

Hiii!! What do you think about a possible Drew redemption arc in s2? I haven't seen you talk about it anywhere, so I'd love to hear your thoughts on it!

Ohoho my fellow human prepare yourself!

I am almost 99% certain Drew is getting a redemption arc. Like narratively it makes the most sense. With the way his characters been set up and written it would just feel wrong for him to not have one. (I mean I love villainous Drew as much as the next but I highly doubt RosyClozy’s gonna just leave his story off on that note.)

However, I think his redemption’s going to be a long process. Drew was left in a very unstable place after the events of Episode 11. He was betrayed by everyone, and ended up cutting out the two people he cared for the most. And if we take my Drew theories into account (the ones about him being codependent and having BPD) it’s pretty obvious he is not going to be doing very well.

Losing two people you were close to in the span of a week’s hell. He’s probably going to have some severe trust issues as a result of everything. Probably extremely paranoid, and maybe he’d cut off Henry and Liam. Push everyone away so he doesn’t have to go through what Zoey and Jake put him through again.

I don’t think he’d bully the Music Club the way he used to. Before it was taunts and insults. Now things are personal. He’s going to need some sort of outlet or something to blame for everything and that is probably going to end up being Jake and the Music Club. He’s gonna take everything he’s been doing to them and multiply it by 10. Because Drew is hurting. And hurting people hurt people.

I think he’s gonna get a villain arc. He’s going to get so much worse before he can get better. But if I’m being honest, I still have yet to figure out how he’s going to do the getting better part.

Because Drew’s stubborn. Drew isn’t going to want to admit the mistakes he made when it came to his and Jake’s friendship. He’s not going to admit he was wrong, and he’s not going to listen to anyone else who tries to tell him.

I feel like he just needs something or someone to drag him out of the hole he keeps digging himself into. (When I figure out what that is I’ll make a follow-up lol.)

And obviously, Drew would develop to realize what an asshole he’s been. Him and Jake will make up, and things will obviously never be the same, but at least they’ll be on good terms. Same thing applies to Henry and Liam if Drew does end up cutting them out.

Actually, biggest plot twist ever: Drew joins the gardening club and that becomes his new therapy. That’s why they were established it’s to help Drew’s character arc. My ultimate crack theory.

(Sorry it took me a little bit to answer this! Needed some time to think through my response lol.)

[runabout-river]

No matter what Gege does with Gojo, I don’t think it will be satisfying for me

I considered every option for what could possibly happen with Gojo, regardless of how likely I think they are, and I genuinely can't find myself considering any of them a satisfying conclusion.

**1. He is dead and no one will mention him in the last chapter.**

Hate this. So much. Random civilians in Shibuya were shown respect by Yuji in the middle of chaos and panic, but nobody has ANYTHING nice to say about Gojo?? Since the fight ended, we got Kusakabe saying he is at fault for not killing Yuji and Shoko calling him an idiot (endearingly) for not destroying Geto's body. Lovely.

**2. He is dead and somebody will say something or we will be shown a grave.**

Better but still bad. I feel like the ship has sailed at this point. They had a chance while reflecting on the fight and we got nothing. Megumi and Shoko were at Tsumiki's grave and... we got nothing. I think it's pretty safe to say no one will be mourning him in the last chapter, they're already going on missions after all. And a simple mention feels incredibly cold and empty.

**3. He is dead but will come back to life due to his soul still not departing and sacrificing one of the Six Eyes in a binding vow.**

I won't comment on how possible or not this is because Yuta managed to return to his body simply by being in proximity of Rika. If Gege wants to write it, he can. However, we are talking about the last chapter of the manga and this would absolutely take away the spotlight from Yuji. Not to mention that this route needs groundwork that I don't think 19 pages can provide for. ALSO, this still doesn't explain why nobody is sad or willing to acknowledge him because, to them, he is dead.

**4. He is actually alive and that's why nobody has been shown to be sad about him.**

Would make sense in terms of characters like Yuji and Yuta not showing any emotion towards him. But this isn't like Nobara's situation. Like I said, it needs build up. A character like Gojo should be shown making his choice, not just appearing out of nowhere. It would add absolutely nothing to his arc and would honestly be pure fanservice.

**5. The dream theory.**

I don’t know how much you've heard about this but there is a theory going around that these last chapters or more have all been a dream. I won't do any analysis on the validity of it because this isn't important to my point. "Who's dream?" is the actual question here.

**a) It is Yuji's dream.**

You want to tell me somebody as kind and compassionate as Yuji has no place for his teacher in his dream of a happier tomorrow? Get out of here.

**b) It is a collective dreamlike state, a product of Sukuna's activation of the Merger despite the rules imposed on it.**

Again, nobody, not a single soul, has it in their heart to include Gojo in their dream? In any way other than criticizing him? It would go against all the care Yuji and Yuta have shown for him and be a genuinely awful characterization. It would show he was actually not loved at all, something we know isn't true.

**c) It is Gojo's dream.**

So, Gojo is dreaming of a world where his body is used as a weapon, his students don't care enough to even mention his name and life goes on as if he never existed? He can imagine himself being blamed but not having a place in his ideal future? Do you want me to kill myself?

I would really like to hear opinions or other options if you have any. Right now, this is all just sad.

*Cracks Knuckles*

First of all, I have read the dream theory and I believe it's possible but for now we take the last chapters at face value.

Yes, the lack of any mourning for Gojo (and Choso) is sad and a sour note at the end of the manga. We already had this lack of regard for his death during the Shinjuku fights. There I could understand though how the characters pushed all their feelings to the side once Gojo had been defeated.

They needed to act fast and steadfast, so we got most of their concern and other emotions while Gojo was still fighting.

Now though there is no excuse anymore. JJK had alwasy been a little loose when it came to the slower and reflective moments but Gege had the space the previous chapter to fill it with somehting meaningful. Instead we got an unnecessary explanation of the New Shadow Style school system that's just plain unimportant three chapters before the end.

So in that regard, yes, Gege fumbled it. Even in the driest part of Gojo's death, there still should've been an earth-shattering shake up of the status quo the same way his birth had changed the jujutsu world. But that was also lacking because chapter 270 basically erased all conflict in the story.

So what will happen now?

Your option 1) hate it, too :D

Option 2) nothing to add. Perfectly said how Gojo should've already been talked about instead of letting it go to the last chapter where he most likely won't get centre stage.

Now to Option 3/4) First, the last chapter will be longer than 19 pages. It was either double or tripple the length of a normal chapter so there is more time to flesh the last things out. Second, I have my own theory on how Yuta using Kenjaku's CT on Gojo's body and then getting ejected from it, might've have permanently revived Gojo.

I don't like Gojo being just alive though because that would be anticlimatic and detrimental to the high stakes and emotions that came before. It would be just one more thing in this super happy ending everyone got (except Choso). What could work though is Gojo's body being alive but in a vegetatitve state. Then it would be open ended how his story would go on.

Now the thing about the dream theory is: Yuji only imagines the good things. That's why characters where their death was ambiguous are all alive and only those who had been 100% confirmed dead are dead. With Yuji doing the dreaming, he would push negative feelings about death away and mourning is one such feeling and he had done exactly that previously as well.

If this theory comes true, Yuji would be mourning way more than just Gojo's death at the end. He would also be mourning the good end he envisioned for everyone. And that's sad but also... what I would prefer in contrast with this sugar cloud of a happy ending.

[mirroredmemoriez]

Crack AU type idea-

Cecilia Pederson as an apprentice, but she’s just used as a “cash pig.” This woman is not there by her own free will, its 100% blackmail.

They let her keep the money in theory, but it has some terms- Such as the fact she will be funding into Jigsaw’s back pocket as compensation! She’s basically had to get into stock and maybe even real estate to actually acquire money that isn’t through a scam.

She has enough to live off of, but it’s not as luxurious. Amanda is basically in charge of watching her banking and they’re always two seconds away from a fist fight. John would never want Cecilia being involved in the trap process, lest someone get the Gabriela treatment. He full well knows that testing this horrible woman didn’t do shit, she’s just loco and thirsty for cash- So he might as well isolate her from society and take her money! Amanda is already becoming progressively more unhinged, so outright admitting to her Cecilia’s test didn’t help her whatsoever likely wouldn’t be a good move.

However, unlike Mark where she can constantly ask, “When’s your test detective?” Amanda was literally physically there whilst Cecilia was tested…. She still hates that Norwegian lady though and constantly attempts to make her life a living hell anytime they have to be around one another for any amount of time. Cecilia makes fun of Amanda’s haircuts and acts as though she cannot see her because of how short she is.

And don’t even get it twisted- Cecilia is constantly trying to think of ways to get out of being blackmailed…. It’s just a matter of getting that freaky somehow a hacker lesbian off of her case. They’ve basically said hey! If we go down? You go down with us, we recorded your game!

How this ever ends? No clue- Someone dead most likely, it’s still Saw after all. But in the mean time, they’re all constantly bickering, fighting and trying to find ways to fuck the other over. John is tired but letting some God take the wheel when it comes to Amanda not putting shit like cyanide in Cecilia’s coffee.

I think the funniest thing within this idea, is for whatever reason them having to try get Cecilia to be fine to wear the pig mask….

[el-moscorrofio-y-el-mercachifle]

I may have my beef with this new season but I'll tell you one thing I'm loving(as far as up until ep 3 goes)

Mario Calderón

He still feels 100% like the Mario we knew, and Betty's vengeance of taking him down from a powerful executive to a mere salesman is amazing, ans I'll tell you why.

Public opinion was always Mario's fear and weak point. In the og novela the only moment we ever see him crack his charismatic persona ans doesn't even try to laugh it off is right at his last scene when Armando exposes him in front of all the secretaries... you know in this scene, he's not even angry about being punched or bothered about Armando's words of accusations because he's dealt with both of them before. He's been choked, threatened, grabbed by the collar, insulted, and been told he's scum and should feel terrible for what he's done a bunch of times throughout the novela, and it never really bothered him long term. What bothered him this time is that there were witnesses who now knew how awful he is and saw how Armando manhandled him.

So public humiliation is his weakness.

And Betty hit him right in that weakness.

Mario is a prideful man. He's always seeked power and been desperate enough to risk the skin to keep it, so to now be downgraded from executive to salesman is a punch in the face. And not only that, he's been reduced to Freddy's status. Freddy, Ecomoda's jester. Freddy, the delivery man. Freddy, the guy who probably didn't even go to college, let alone to a prestigious one... him and Mario, put in the same place. Betty is telling him that he's as useful and poweful as the delivery guy who couldn't progress in 20 years and that everyone used for amusement.

To a classist man like Mario, being on Freddy's level is a direct attack, threat, and humiliation. He didn't even bother in dissimulating his dark persona, he straight up said that if Betty did this to him, she'd be getting an enemy. No joking around, no charisma, no pretty words. Direct to the point.

And this is so Betty, too. We know she's very good at vengeance. She knows how to sting when she wants to and knows how to get people's weaknesses when needed. This is really in line with both of them.

Mario also says that Betty wouldn't want a man like him as an enemy, and I believe that. We know Mario is a man with practically no morals. We know he knows some shady people. We know he's very, very cruel and willing to do anything to cling to power.

finally, I'm actually seeing something that might be interesting about this new season. Hopefully, they know how to play him as an antagonist because that Daniel-wannabe, Ignacio, is so not it. Mario, on the other hand, has so much potential.

What do y'all think?? Spoilers welcomed if anyone has theories or info!

[melodicbreeze]

What's your favorite Venti lore/references?

For me it's him guiding souls after death and being connected to istaroth. Also the whole prodigal son thing, What do you think it means for him? (Hope you don't mind getting asks like this, i couldn't help but be curious)

CRACKS MY KNUCKLES. ALRIGHT FOLKS, BUCKLE UP.

DEATH

First off, I absolutely love his ties to death! Usually in media, when gods deal in the realm of death, they're all dark and dreary and either sad or evil. Venti, on the other hand, embodies more of the aspects of comfort. A final rest after a life well lived. Barbatos is said to guide the souls of the deceased to the afterlife on a wind, yes, but he also lets them live on through song! There is a belief that someone isn't truly dead until their name has been spoken for the last time, and Venti places importance of using names in his songs, as seen in the manga when he asks Venessa if he can use her name in a song.

There's also how heavily anemo ties into the concept of loss (gestures at the dead friend gives you an anemo vision joke), and the anemoi wind spirits from myths were also once a guide of souls to the afterlife.

There's also the post I made last night- "Not death, but his brother, sleep" (shout out to The Ra.ven Cycle book series). In Greek mythologies, which Venti does have a few ties to, Death and Sleep are brothers- and we all know of Venti's ties to sleep. Aside from his times of sleep, he was also seen singing the guards to sleep when going to free Venessa.

ANYWAY all this to say I think along with the wind, freedom, and hope, death is one domain that Venti falls into. (Which just makes him and Hu Tao even better buddies).

ISTAROTH

This is where I can more theory crafting rather than reflective. We've learned the the Thousand Winds were the Thousand Winds of Time. Now, I do not think that Venti is a son in the traditional sense- rather, I think that the Thousand Winds of Time form one being- Istaroth.

Venti also called himself a single breeze/wind, so I believe he was one of the thousand that made up Istaroth, only to rise up above the others in terms of power during the rebellion against Decarabian, and then becoming a god in his own right.

Do I have much evidence for this? Not at all! It's just my thoughts.

(Also, apparently prodigal means wastefully extravagant, which while I admit my first thought is his indulgences in drink and revelry, also make me wonder if it is perhaps that he has made Mondstadt into a home where people can act as such if they please- free to do so.)

OTHER THOUGHTS

One of my favourite bits of lore comes from the Wings of Shimmering Galaxy lore. It's spoken from the perspective of Venti post Archon War! It goes to say,

"For he knew that someone must heal the hurts of the world, and thus someone needed to find a way to communicate with them."

From Zhongli's character stories, we know that Venti went to visit, bringing a gift of wine- and that that led to the 7 all meeting together regularly. He is a bard, and the god of the wind- music and poetry flow like the wind, after all. Of course he would facilitate communication! HOWEVER, this didn't work for a long, long time. In fact, the glider lore continues,

"But the poet knew this would happen. (...) Still, the poet did not give up, though not because he believed or anything. This was just the way he was."

Despite being called the god of Hope by Neuvilette, Venti didn't have any hope. He just... didn't know what else to do.

Anyway, I should end it here, before I ramble on for many more paragraphs about all the things I love about Venti.