#do they have to be so protective and caring ALL the time

[mageofmadness]

CALEB + HOLE INSPECTION

(1.8k) ₊˚⊹ 𐙚🧸‧₊˚ nsfw [18+] includes: fem!reader, jealous!caleb, questionable morals, cheating (not on caleb it's just a shitty bf), hole inspections, virginity kink if you squint, dirty talk real filthy, side eyeing yandere caleb for the mention of broken fingers and kneecaps, fingering, pet names (I'll die by the hill of pips)

caleb who is selfish.

he wants you all to himself, and he doesn’t care what it takes or how bad of a person that makes him. he’ll do anything to have you. caleb will stoop to whatever depths, so when you start going on dates with this new guy, he wishes he was conflicted but he’s not.

he’s never tried to be a good guy, not when it comes to you. fair? sure, he thinks he’s quite fair. just? yeah, he has morals like anyone else, but when it comes to you? all bets are off and he will play dirty. there’s simply no other way to play when the stakes are this high and you.

caleb who has been climbing into bed with you almost every night for years.

surely that’s not meant to stop now, right? that just seems cruel and even more selfish than what he’s got going on because caleb can’t sleep if he’s not next to you, and you tell him the same thing, so why do you need to go on dates with this guy? what’s the point? you still kiss caleb goodnight, sometimes missing his cheek and sometimes it’s closer to the corner of his mouth. you still curl up with him on the couch and wear his sweaters around the house, something he watched carefully to see a change in, but things between you and him are the same, so surely you're not about to take all of that from him now? all because of some guy you met at work?

yet, said guy won’t leave, and caleb does not like it. he deals, he manages, but he does not like sharing because, once again, he is selfish.

caleb who meets the guy for the first time and instantly hates him. not even because he’s taking you out, it’s because he’s spineless. a boy that couldn’t even look him in the eyes to shake hands. a boy—plain and simple. caleb can’t help but feel bad for the guy, really, considering he’s taking you on a date, but you’ll come home to caleb at the end of the night and curl up with caleb in bed.

caleb is not above any of this because this guy is fleeting, he has to be. he doesn’t know you, he doesn’t know what you like or want or need. not the way caleb does.

caleb who is waiting up for you when you come home.

it’s been a few months of dates with this guy, but caleb still gets his corner of the mouth kiss every other night, and last night he fell asleep to the feeling of your soft thigh thrown over his middle, so it should be fine, right? instead you come home in tears, and his first instinct is to break the man’s hands. he needs to start with the fingers, then maybe his wrists.

“pips, what’s wrong?”

you’re adamant it’s nothing. that nothing happened and you’re overreacting and caleb thinks sure, you can overreact sometimes but everyone can and that’s what he’s here for: to understand and react accordingly as well. but he cannot do that, caleb cannot protect you, if you do not tell him what’s wrong. sitting in his lap on the couch, face buried in his neck, he can’t understand what you’re mumbling. it comes out like something is wrong with me, which surely cannot be the case. caleb must have heard wrong. 

“something is wrong with you?” you nod. “nothing is wrong with you, sweetheart. why are you saying that?” caleb takes a deep breath. “you gotta tell me what’s happening or i can’t help.”

by the time caleb listens to the half-mumbled words you manage to get out around an errant sniffles, he’s already decided hands, wrist, and kneecaps will need to be broken to atone for this because that guy has some nerve insinuating there’s a single thing wrong with you. just because you didn’t want to kiss him? or, you tell caleb that you were fine kissing him, but when he tried to take things further, that’s when there were issues.

honestly, it takes everything in caleb not to scoff. the guy's more of a coward than he had initially gauged if he thought he a) deserved more than a kiss, first of all, and b) something is wrong with you because when he shoved his hand down your pants you weren't wet.

the guy doesn't exactly sound like a romeo.

“i don’t trust him,” caleb says plainly. “i never did. you deserve better, and i should have never let you walk out of that door.” you only sniffle and caleb tampers down his anger and tries again. “i’m so sorry, sweetheart. there’s nothing wrong with you, you know that?” nothing again, and caleb sighs. finally, “do you trust me?”

you nod, arms tightening around his neck.

“he touched you here?” caleb asks. his hand skates around your hip. you squirm in his lap but give him a small yes when his fingers dip between your thighs. “just touched or…”

nothing else, you’re adamant and caleb trusts you explicitly, but his blood is boiling hot and he just…he needs to be sure. caleb sits up, and you hmph, but he shushes you. he needs you to know there’s not a thing wrong with you, that this isn’t a you issue. he smooths his hand over the hem of your dress that rides up the back of your thighs when he moves, draping you over his lap this time, ass up.

“were you going to fuck him?” caleb gets a gut wrenching maybe in response as he marvels at the silky smooth expanse of the back of your legs. so, so pretty. “why?” he unfairly demands. “you liked him that much?”

you shake your head, breathing heavy against his thighs. “no, just wanted to know…what it felt like.”

“that’s what i’m here for, pips.” he says, waiting for you to stop him, but you don’t. you gasp as he rucks up your dress, letting it pool around your waist. he groans at the sight of bright red panties, the curve of your ass settled pretty over his lap about to be his undoing. “you know that right? tell me you know that.” he pleads. "can i touch you?"

"please."

caleb wastes no time. he thumbs at your hole, over the red lace that's wet under his touch. “you ever fuck yourself, sweetheart?”

you whine his name in embarrassment, but eventually nod. he groans, imagining you in bed or the shower with your fingers buried to the knuckle in your cunt. maybe while he's in the other room, or maybe in the shower right before you crawl into bed with him.

“good girl,” he mumbles and feels you relax more. “but what's all this about?” caleb pulls his thumb back, and pops it in his mouth. he groans. “thought he was adamant something was wrong and this pussy doesn’t get wet.” caleb tsks but sighs in relief when he realizes they guy really didn't get this far. “doesn’t seem a problem to me, so, then what is it? tell me the difference here, pips.”

he hears you stammer out "y–you, caleb," and feels satisfaction like a bat to the back of the head, making him dizzy. concussing him. caleb's fingers trace over edges of lace and soft skin. “so pretty, baby. will you sit still while i take a look?”

“why?”

“nothing is wrong, sweetheart. i just want to make sure he didn't hurt this pretty hole.”

he feels you shiver, and caleb can't help but grin.

that guy didn't stand a chance.

he slowly drags your underwear down, discarding them in his pocket for safe keeping. what greets him when he looks back is the prettiest pussy he’s ever seen, actually. it’s jaw-dropping, and wet. so clearly wet from the way it looks, sticky and peeking out between plush thighs over his lap.

“my heart, pips, i cant take it.” caleb says as he grips your hips, then your ass. watching your skin bloom pink as he spreads you open to see more. “hold still. i know you know that you can ask anything of me, so if this hole is needy, you come to me now, understood?”

"you need someone to take care of you, not someone that's going to shove his hands down your pants and expect anything, got it?"

he spreads your pussy open, watching as it twitches under his touch and when he presses a finger against your hole, it gives easily. "tight and greedy," he tsks.

caleb cannot help but tease. your pussy is perfect and untouched. he plays with it, watching you respond. watching as you jump when he pushes just the tip of two fingers in. pink and so sweet, caleb's mouth waters. "she's so pretty, sweetheart. i do think we're gonna have an issue though. i dunno if i can fit into a tiny hole like this." he hooks his finger and uses it to stretch you open and you moan his name. "don't get fussy. we'll figure it out, pips."

he watches as you whimper and moan, working yourself into a near fit over the prodding of his fingers. the way he spreads you open, leaning close and letting his breath ghost over your twitching hole. watching for your reactions and never giving you enough.

“doesn't even seem like i need to train this little hole to only get wet for me, hm? seems she’s already taken care of that herself."

"you're so soft, sweetheart.”

"can i make you come? looks like you need it." he kisses the back of your head, and then your shoulder. mumbling, "promise I'll take such good care of you. how could i not? i've got the sweetest thing in my lap right now, all wet and whining...mhm, you are whining, pips, but that's okay. just let me..."

after readjusting your hips, you easily take two of his fingers, all the way to the knuckle and instead of imginging you doing this to yourself, caleb watches as his own fingers disappear into your cunt. you're a needy thing, too, and he groans. imagining you struggling to take his cock but you would because you're, "so good, baby. so good for me, just like that. does that feel good?"

watching as your thighs fall further apart, as you start to cry for him. for more. for him to kiss you, and caleb does. of course he does. he pulls his fingers out, picking you up and tossing you over his shoulder as he heads for his bed.

"think i'm gonna fuck you, pips," caleb mumbles, bringing a hand down on your ass. you scold him, still limp-legged and breathing heavy. head heavy in the clouds. caleb grins and tosses you onto the bed. "you want that? then we'll have another look at that hole."

@ mageofmadness 2025. ִֶָ. 234.108.120 238.165.187

[pomegranatelifethis]

Live in the moment

Batfamily x Youngest and Clumsiest Little Sister

"You were just walking… how did this even happen?"

Being the youngest member of Gotham’s greatest hero family was already a challenge, but being a complete disaster made things even harder. Yet, your brothers adored you—despite the fact that you constantly got yourself into trouble… or accidentally put yourself in danger.

---

1. Dick Grayson (Nightwing) - "My Reflexes Have Improved Thanks to You."

Dick spent years training to perfect his reflexes… but his real test was you.

Catching falling cups before they hit the ground? ✅

Grabbing you before you tumbled down the stairs? ✅

Stopping you from accidentally falling onto criminals? (Not so much…)

"You know what? One day, I'm going to tie a bunch of balloons to you. At least that way, you can’t fall."

But as much as you exasperated him, your energy reminded him of his younger self. And deep down, he had silently sworn to always protect you.

---

2. Jason Todd (Red Hood) - "Are You Getting Into Trouble on Purpose?"

Jason could handle Gotham’s deadliest criminals, but your clumsiness? That was a different kind of nightmare.

One time, you accidentally spilled coffee on a gang leader. You don’t remember what happened next because Jason whisked you out of there before things could go south.

"Look, kid, if you ever do something like that again… you will, won’t you? Ugh."

No matter how much he grumbled, he was always the first to come to your rescue.

---

3. Tim Drake (Red Robin) - "You Don’t Have to Try This Hard to Die in Gotham."

Tim analyzed your clumsiness and tried to come up with solutions. But no matter what he did, you still found ways to get into trouble.

A simple walk = Crashing into a streetlamp.

Drinking water = Somehow short-circuiting Gotham’s power grid. (They still don’t know how.)

"Alright, new plan: I’m making a drone that follows you 24/7. Just in case."

He tried to keep you safe, but in the end, he just accepted that you were a walking disaster.

---

4. Damian Wayne (Robin) - "How Are You Even Related to Us?"

Damian expected you to live up to the Wayne name. But your technique? A complete disaster.

One time, during training in the Batcave, you somehow managed to punch yourself in the face.

"Biologically, how is that even possible?!"

But if anyone outside the family tried to hurt you? They’d quickly learn that Damian’s sword was much faster than their escape.

"You might drive me insane, but no one else is allowed to hurt you."

---

5. Bruce Wayne (Batman) - "You Are Gotham’s Biggest Danger."

Bruce knew Gotham was dangerous… but keeping you safe was a whole different battle.

Whenever you tried to sneak out of the Batcave, he always caught you. And every time, he would take a deep breath before speaking.

"I’ve told you countless times. It’s dangerous out there."

"But I was just walking—"

"Yes. And last week, while 'just walking,' you nearly fell off a construction site!"

But no matter how many rules he put in place, his biggest fear was losing you. And in his own way, he always made sure you knew how much he cared.

---

Conclusion:

Being the clumsiest, most trouble-prone member of the Batfamily wasn’t easy… but no matter what, they all loved you. And every time you found yourself in danger, they were always there to save you.

[astonmartinii]

popularity contest | alex albon social media au

pairing: alex albon x fem doohan!reader

jack is struggling with making friends in formula one, good thing he’s got an annoyingly popular sister and a reluctantly friendly brother in law.

MASTERLIST | TIP JAR

f1

liked by yourusername, pierregasly and 1,209,778 others

f1: for the first time ever, we have in-laws on the grid! jack doohan makes his full debut for alpine alongside his brother in law alex albon, who is married to y/n doohan, one of australia's biggest business women!

view all comments

user1: not for long

user2: for real admin is being a little bit optimistic here

user3: the way franco was last season, i think he’d also like to take y/n off of alex’s hands too

user4: omggggg can you people let us have anything

yourusername: proudest big sister ever

yourusername: and wife i guess

yourusername: alex has been doing this long enough he can wait for the praise

alexalbon: i’ll let him get away with it this once just because it’s his debut

jackdoohan: you’re soooooooo generous alex!

alexalbon: i know this is sarcasm but i’m choosing to ignore that

user5: i’m not reading all of that - don’t care - bring back franco

user6: true i need his cute face back on the grid

alexalbon: never disrespect those doohan genes again

jackdoohan: i knew you believed in me alex

alexalbon: you’ll kill it dude, but i was referring to the fact that i am hopelessly in love with your sister

yourusername: doohan face card never declines

jackdoohan: 💅

user7: i’m so glad jack will have his sister in the paddock and alex, his entry to f1 hasn’t been the kindest

user8: alex is such a beloved personality in the paddock as well so hopefully that’ll help jack make friends

user9: i know y/n has been bugging alex about taking jack to the padel dates

yourusername: ho are you in my walls

user10: flavio briatore if you tear my family apart you will be hearing from my lawyers

user11: i’ll be needing a lawyer after my actions

user12: we need him to ban him again

yourusername

liked by alexalbon, pierregasly and 892,046 others

tagged: jackdoohan

yourusername: baby brother is a formula one driver! words can’t express how proud i am watching him zip around albert park.

view all comments

user13: nothing you people (alpine) can do will ruin this moment for me

user14: her literally crying in the alpine garage with their dad watching him was so cute eventhough sky insisted on yammering on about franco the whole time

user15: i can’t wait for jack to prove them all wrong

liked by yourusername

jackdoohan: it felt 100x better knowing you guys were there too

yourusername: we wouldn’t miss it for the world

yourusername: that includes alex

jackdoohan: he’s contractually obligated to be here

alexalbon: doesn’t mean i’m any less proud!

yourusername: oh great, now i’m crying again

user16: yeah this is cute and all, but am i the only one getting annoyed at her shading franco constantly

user17: yes there’s literally no reason she needs to be liking those kind of comments

yourusername: chat is it illegal to be excited for and protect my brother?

user18: you can keep franco’s name out of your mouth to do so

yourusername: i’ve never said a bad word about franco, so watch your tone, especially when he hasn’t been the most respectful towards my relationship himself.

user19: omg why is she spilling the tea when it’s 3am in europe 😭

oscarpiastri: two aussies on track at albert park - we love to see it

oscarpiastri: but now i’m thinking about it, why aren’t i sponsored by doohan me?

yourusername: girly i think you have enough sponsors already

jackdoohan: this is the greed they wrote about in the bible…

user20: so jack is a nepo nepo baby?

yourusername: tell me you don’t love your brother without telling me you don’t love your brother

user21: also she literally sponsors alex as well… why wouldn’t she help out the people she loves when she owns the biggest apparel and makeup companies in australia…

alexalbon: i’m chopped liver this weekend…

yourusername: you can be second for one weekend

alexalbon: fine… i’ll hold you to that

yourusername: and i’ll hold you too

alexalbon: oh hehehehehe

georgerussell63: loser

alexalbon

liked by danielricciardo, oscarpiastri and 672,099 others

tagged: yourusername & jackdoohan

alexalbon: p6? and Q2 for jack? i guess you could say we're doohan okay :P

view all comments

user22: doohan/albon family you are so precious to me

user23: this post got me crying in the club at 6am

user24: the way jack RAN to alex in parc ferme was so so so cute i can’t

yourusername: it’s sweat in my eyes i SWEAR

alexalbon: okay baby, we believe you

jackdoohan: i always knew i was your favourite brother

yourusername: you’re the only one?

jackdoohan: omg p1

alexalbon: a win is a win

user25: jack being second of all the rookies is just what he needed this weekend !!!

user26: babe is not playing around

georgerussell63: get in there alex!!!

georgerussell63: but please stay away from my car tomorrow

yourusername: i know this man ain’t talking

georgerussell63: i’m not engaging with this

yourusername: … pussy

alexalbon: when your wife and friend get along

georgerussell63: eh hem * best friend

alexalbon: slow your roll there buddy

georgerussell63: who could possibly be your best friend - and don’t say y/n because that doesn’t count

alexalbon: jack is right there

georgerussell63: i’m gonna pretend you didn’t just say that

alexalbon: well the rest of you have hardly made him feel welcome have you?

user27: omg alex is out here gagging the girls

user28: and he ate!

user29: i mean alex was lucky having george and lando when he made his debut, jack has the other rookies but i’ve got the sense he’s been made a bit of an outsider

user30: this whole situation is so sad i’m not going to lie - i’m glad alex is clearly there for him and that y/n goes to like 90% of the races

danielricciardo: flying the aussie flags high boys, proud of you!

jackdoohan: thank you daniel :))))))))

alexalbon: the thai flag is right there… but i’ll take it dude! see you for dinner tomorrow xx

yourusername: we’ll see if we can kidnap oscar and make it a full on aussie affair

alexalbon: i am not aussie !!!

yourusernamel: yes you are

alexalbon: yes i am

user31: how all husbands should be ^^^

f1newsandgossip

liked by user42, user50 and 11,045 others

f1newsandgossip: it’s being reported that both alex albon and max verstappen called a grid meeting to call out the exclusion of jack doohan. insiders state it got extremely heated, with alex albon not holding back.

view all comments

user31: i mean…. i have to agree with alex like that dinner was unnecessarily cruel

user32: it’s SO strange that they managed to invite all of the other rookies but not him

user33: if it’s not cruel it’s extremely negligent from the grid

user34: hey wasn’t george on some anti-bully tirade at the end of last season? what happened to that…

user35: he’s the head of the GDPA and likely was the one to organise this meal - he should know better

user36: if george did organise it and alex was as incensed as they say, it was BAD bad

user37: max standing up for jack is so needed thank you

user38: i mean we all know how max was treated as a rookie…

user39: and he was super chatty with jack at the photoshoot so at least he’s tried

user40: more than what some could say

user41: i think it’s crazy that the grid haven’t made an effort with jack considering they are constantly licking y/n’s ass trying to ride her coat tails

user42: SO TRUE

user43: they like the doohans so much that they’ll constantly use and wear her products, making sure to tag her but they can’t invite her brother to dinner?

user44: anyone seen those pictures kym illman posted of y/n on the phone in the paddock?

user45: baby was PISSED

user46: rightly so tbf

user47: the fact that both her and her dad ignored sky this morning >>>

user48: i mean, as they should, all they do is talk about franco when jack is on screen

user49: alex and jack coming in together this morning, both wearing doohan me merch …. kings

user50: the only positive from this meeting/ idk fight is the fact that a load of drivers flocked to alpine

user52: charles bringing leo ???

user53: took too long, but i’m glad they pulled their heads out of their asses

f1

liked by maxverstappen1, lewishamilton and 2,945,300 others

tagged: jackdoohan

f1: aussies… are you doohan good? jack doohan scored points on his full debut at home, picking up a p9 finish. we don’t think anyone was happier than his sister, but brother in law alex albon was pretty pleased too…

view all comments

user54: flavio briatore… come outside… i just want to talk

user55: aussies we be smoking on that briatore pack tonight

user56: y/n’s smug smile at him in the garage was ALL of us

oscarpiastri: aussie aussie aussie

jackdoohan: oi oi oi

oscarpiastri: stoked for you dude honestly

jackdoohan: much appreciated - congrats on the podium!

user57: my aussie boys !!!!!!!!!!

user58: alex holding jack while he cried is the moment of the season already i don’t think we’ll top it

user59: i need it tattooed on the inside of my eyelids for real

user60: the other drivers all coming to congratulate him - better late than never

user61: i honestly think alex was happier for alex than himself even though he got fourth

user62: that’s family right there

yourusername: jack doohan world dominance would bore no one

yourusername: but on a real note, unbelievably proud of you baby brother

jackdoohan: would never have happened without you - i love you <3

alexalbon: nothing but love for my favourite brother in law!

alexalbon: there’s been a lot of chat about him but jack is the real deal

yourusername: my two favourite boys, i love you guys and i’m so proud

user63: jack getting points at home is such poetic justice

user64: i need him to know we love him

user65: i mean other than oscar’s podium his points was defo the biggest cheer of the weekend!

alpinef1: it’s just what he does 🤩

yourusername: and what he’ll continue to do…

user66: the way this is an actual threat LOL

jackdoohan

liked by georgerussell63, landonorris and 348,208 others

tagged: alexalbon & yourusername

jackdoohan: this weekend has been everything and more for me. to get my first points at home, means the world, and to be supported by my favourite people in the world made it all the more sweeter. y/n, these points are for you, thank you for always supporting me and alex, thank you for being there for me - it’s been lonely but you’ve welcomed me as best as you could. here’s to the rest of the season!

view all comments

user66: i am NOT crying

user67: thank the lord for alex albon!

user68: my shaylas

liked by yourusername

maxverstappen1: congratulations jack, the first points of many!

jackdoohan: thank you max, maybe i’ll be able to get close enough to race you personally…

maxverstappen1: hopefully it’s for podiums…

lewishamilton: well in jack! congratulations!

charles_leclerc: congratulations on your first points jack :D

user69: looks like a stern talking to by alex albon works a plenty

user70: we love to see it

alexalbon: mr jack, there’s nothing me or your sister wouldn’t do for you - never hesitate to reach out. we’re so proud of you and will be here for you every step of the way!

yourusername: what he said

yourusername: i love you baby brother and i’m so so proud. i won’t stop saying it until i die

jackdoohan: i love you guys so much

yourusername: also @alexalbon you’re the best husband in the world, looking out for jack. you’re the most amazing man in the world xx

alexalbon: i’d do anything for you and for jack. i love you and i wake up thankful everyday that you decided that i’m worth marrying

yourusername: there’s no one else in the world worth marrying xx

landonorris: @jackdoohan how are you so chill about them professing their love under your congratulations post?

jackdoohan: i love them and i love that they love each other?

user71: i need a relationship like y/n and alex

user72: i need siblings like them omg

isackhadjar: you slayed jack!

kimiantonelli: 🔥

user73: why are we all fawning over the drivers in being in the comment section? it’s clear alex just guilted them into doing it

user74: for real, f1 isn’t a popularity contest it’s about winning

yourusername: jack doesn’t have to be popular, but he will be respected

alexalbon: and if anyone is ‘guilted’ into being a nice person, that’s their issue

jackdoohan: :3

fin.

note: she's back? she's also been up since 3am to watch the f2 so enjoy my sleep deprived fuelled love for alex (let's go p6????) and jack (because seriously, give him a shot god damn)!!!

[pyrodolls]

imagine all the yandere monsters in your village obsessed with you, the only human

naturally, you are seen as the monarch of the village. the only thing every creature can agree on, is that they love and respect you. even though you're not really interested in any of them.

THE WEREWOLF is the most aggressive of the creatures within the village. he’s the one that everyone fears. he isn’t the strongest, but he’s the one that never backs down from a fight. he’s the one that would shed anyone’s blood in your name without hesitation. he’s the one that doesn’t even try to hide the disgusted look in his eyes that flashes every time you lend someone else your kindness and attention. he always fantasizes about ripping them to shreds and carrying you away to safety.

he's boastful, and loud. he constantly challenges others to fights-- especially in front of you. he thinks you'll be impressed by his strength, and the more he shows off and wins fights, he'll also win your heart. he'd rip some poor nymph to shreds and hold the heart up to you, hoping you'll be proud of him and spare at least a glance his way. maybe even say he did a good job or perhaps tell him that he's oh so strong and courageous.

if only you treated him as more than a lapdog. if only you looked at him with the same adoration that he looks at you with. he’ll glare at everyone but you. he’ll ignore and growl at everyone he sees, because they're not you.

his infatuation with you is more than a respect for your royalty. deep down, he yearns to be by your side. he doesn’t need the power that you have, just as long as he’s the one with you. as long as he’s the only one that can stay with you and protect you from harm. he’ll stand at your guard for hours if you requested him to do so. he’ll happily accept your request with a rare sway to his tail.

he needs to be your guard. he needs to make sure you’re safe at all times or else he will deem himself worthless. with his sharp teeth, long claws and piercing stare, almost anyone would be frightened by the giant, aggressive werewolf at your side.

but no matter how rough and tough he acts; he’ll always crumble the second your hand raises up to his head to scratch or pat him on the head.

THE HARPY is the one that lusts after you the most. she's raunchy, easygoing, and mischievous. plus, of all the creatures, the harpy is the bluntest. she’ll gleefully and casually mention to you all of her wicked fantasies. every morning, she flies around trying to find you, and once she does, she goes on and on about the things she’s imagined you two doing. the other creatures are far more ashamed of their urges, thinking that they’re dirtying your image as their monarch. but the harpy? she doesn’t give a flying fuck if you’re the ruler or a peasant. she’s imagined your body in thousands of ways, none of them have to do with your status.

even though you have always rejected her advances, she’s always going to keep trying. she’s convinced that you’re just shy and in denial of your feelings. she’s convinced that you’re destined to be hers. she started doing outlandish things to catch your attention and get you out of your shell. she started physically touching you more, such as kissing your cheek and laying on your lap. she thinks you're in love with her, no matter how many times you blatantly tell her that you're not interested.

she revels in the other creatures’ jealousy and hatred of her. she knows the others only think of her as a dirty harlot, ruining the valiant image of their ruler. but she couldn't care less about what others think. she barely even cares what you think. she knows what she wants, and nobody will stop her from getting it. not even you.

THE FAIRY is the most envious of them all. fairies are known for being small and weak. he knew you weren't going to like him. that's why he desperately tried to get your approval the moment he met you. he always leaves you small gifts and watches from afar as you collect them, hoping that it'll be something that you enjoy. he knows that pixies are generally the ones that leave small gifts, but he had to find some way to gain your favor. he's only 6 inches tall and could easily be stomped on by the other creatures. so that means he isn't strong, or incredibly intelligent, or immortal. he has nothing going for him compared to the others, so all he can do is be as kind as possible to you.

deep down, he's aware that he doesn't stand a chance. but he keeps trying. he knows he loves you more than any of the other creatures can say. he would be kind to you. he would follow your every command. he would do whatever you want him to do. he just wants you. it doesn't matter how you treat him or what you do to him. sure, if you hurt him, he won't be very happy about it, but he'll still be grateful that you even looked his way and gave him a chance.

he's usually very friendly and giving towards others, and especially to you, but behind closed doors, he's cruel towards those that you show love and affection to. he knows it's wrong. he knows you would probably be mad at him for his behavior. but he can't help it. everyone else is so much bigger and stronger than he is. deep down, he knows they could protect and take care of you better than he can. so, his inferiority complex shifts into anger that he takes out onto them. and if they happen to snitch on him, he'll just start fake crying. you'd comfort him and tell him everything's okay, because you trust him! he's the one that is so small, gentle, and always gifts you, so he'd never do anything wrong...

THE VAMPIRE has a strategy to winning you over. she's one of the eldest, most intelligent and calculated creatures in the village. over the course of the couple thousand years that she's been alive, she never had any romantic interest in anyone until she met you. you changed something in her. she's always been very formal, and polite, but you awoke something new in her. something... possessive and perhaps even controlling. after meeting you, she suddenly had the urge to take care of you. as she unfortunately cannot be in the sun, so she watches you from afar. follows you from a distance, making sure you are safe. she's ready to step in as soon as she needs to, in order to protect you.

she's more likely to take a friendlier, respectful approach compared to others. unlike the vulgar harpy, or the overly submissive fairy, she's more formal and respects your authority as their leader. every night, she walks around your house and if you happen to come out, she pretends she was "on her way home" and says that it "would be a lovely time to go for a walk" and you assume she was telling the truth.

the best part about having a plan such as hers, is that the other creatures have no idea that she's interested in you. they go to her for advice and try to ask for her help in courting you. they trust her, not knowing she'll ruin them once she knows their plans in wooing you. and they'll never know that it was her, because she's the beautiful older woman in the village that has never caused any problems! everyone loves her. and soon, you will too.

she's patient. everyone else is in such a rush to make you theirs immediately, but she knows you're worth waiting for. she knows that in the end, she'll come out on top, and you'll be hers. all she must do is wait.

THE ELF is one of the shyest. she's looked down upon in the village for being too timid and messy. with frizzy hair, pointy ears, and a dreadful fashion sense, she stays in her dingy little shack in the woods, crafting weapons and houseware to sell to the villagers. every month, she begrudgingly makes her visit to the village's market to display and sell her things, then go straight back home. she dreads seeing others, feeling safe only in the solitude of the quiet woods.

she always knew of a human monarch ruling over the land, but she didn't bother investigating for herself. she wanted to just make and sell her goods, then lurk in the outskirts of the village in peace. but one day, you just happened to be at her usual selling place.

she dropped all her items in a few baskets, standing by ready to give them away. that's when you approached, offering a generous sum of money to purchase items that were rumored to "be of high quality" from the other villagers. the second she saw you, her heart almost stopped. she knew the monarch was supposed to be beautiful, but she wasn't aware you were going to look that good. she quickly and awkwardly wrapped the items in leaves, handing them to you and feeling her heart skip a beat when your fingers brushed against hers. she thanked you, bowing her head so you wouldn't see how red her pale skin became. you simply walked away without saying anything else.

she replayed that moment over and over again in her head on her journey back home. should she have said something else? should she have refused your money or given you more items? should she have wrapped your items in something fancier than random leaves she picked from the forest? god, you probably think she's a loser now. you probably dislike her just as much as everyone else does. she maybe even offended you, because she didn't recognize you at first.

she spent that whole night rethinking her entire life choices. and the night after that. and the night after that. and that whole week. and the next week. then the next. until it was time to sell her things again. this time, she would be prepared for your arrival.

she spent that month lurking around the village, overhearing the things people said about you. she never knew there was so much competition to win your heart! she'd definitely have to study your interests to win you over.

every day, she peeked into your castle and carefully inspected your bedroom. she studied your clothes, hair, accessories, decorations, and more. she took note of it all, storing it in her memory to use later in order to impress you and show that she would be the best candidate for your affections.

when the day came for her to publicly return to the village, she made sure her hair was nicely put together, instead of the usual frizzy look. she made sure her clothes weren't so tattered and dirty, and she was wearing your favorite color. she made sure her goods were clean and wrapped nicely in cloth that she sewed herself, based on the designs on your castle's carpet.

she waited and waited. the usual customers came by, surprised that she seemed more put together-- but she didn't spare them a single glance. she was just looking for you. where were you? did you not like her goods? or maybe her initial thoughts were correct: her first impression was so terrible that you hate her, and you'll never see her again.

it was late at night, way past her curfew. she was packing her things ready to return home and cry herself to sleep after you didn't show up. until she finally spotted you in the distance, walking next to the vampire lady.

she felt her face go red in embarrassment. what was she even thinking? of course you're into someone else. she spent an entire month obsessing over you to the point where she mended her appearance to impress you and maybe get you to spend more time with her. but it was all for naught, wasn't it?

but maybe... she can keep trying. she put in so much effort. she tried so hard to EARN your approval, instead of trying to seduce you like that old ass vampire. she's never felt this way for anyone before. she hates everyone else. she hates talking to people, spending time with people. they've never liked her anyway. but you didn't hate her. you just purchased her goods with an incredible amount of money and never insulted her or raised a single finger on her. she'll never forget that. she'll always be grateful for that. in return, she'll make herself better for you. she'll change, and you'll be nice to her again... maybe even love her just as much as she loves you... right?

THE MERMAN is one of the cutest, yet the most codependent and manipulative of them all. he's just a defenseless merman; he can't go on land! you'll have to visit him every day and talk to him, or else he'll go mad. you can't leave him alone for a single day, because he has no other friends. that would be so rude of you.

every day, he sits and waits for you, posing prettily on the biggest rock on the beach. if anyone were to flirt or try to talk to him, he'd usually roll his eyes and swim away. he has a bit of a reputation for being the most handsome creature out of everyone else in the village. but no matter how many villagers attempt to charm him, none of them have ever caught his eye. in fact, they often leave the beach crying in despair after he rejects them with no remorse or kindness. he'll insult them and bluntly tell them he would never be interested in them.

because you're the only one he wants.

he sees your riches. your beauty. your power and intelligence. he's attracted to all of it. he fantasizes every day about being with you. he knows that you're human and you can't be with him all day, but he can't bare being away from you for so long! he's tried multiple times to crawl on land, but he just can't do it without fainting and being carried back to the sea by one of his fellow merfolk.

he begs you to spend as much time as you can with him. he is overjoyed the moment he sees you walking towards his spot at the beach. he starts squealing and splashing around, doing a few tricks to impress you. he immediately starts bombarding you with questions, asking how you are and what you're doing later, subtly wrapping his tail around your arm so you can't walk away. he talks to you nonstop, trying to make you stay. he knows you are royalty, and you have your duties, but they can't be more important than him.

every time you even hint at leaving, he starts getting emotional. what do you mean you're leaving soon? don't you know what you mean to him? you know you're his only connection to the outside world and the land. you're one of his only friends. you can't just leave him. don't you know how much he cares about you? don't you know how many people he's rejected for you? don't you know how many hours he spent combing through his hair with a fork he found lying washed up on the sand? don't you know how many hours he spent trying to polish his scales, making them shinier to catch your eye? he tried so hard to look all pretty for you, and now you're just going to leave?

wait, you'll come back tomorrow? oh, okay. well, why didn't you just say that sooner? just don't keep him waiting too long. even though you're leaving, he'll stay lying on his rock, staring at your castle with a longing look in his teary eyes, waiting for your return.

[honey-bitch]

Moon in the Ascendant Persona Chart - Houses ⏾⋆.˚

Woah I'm on my new series of doing all the persona charts, and I'm on a roll today 2 posts down more to go. Anyways the ascendant persona chart can give you more context about how you appear to the world and in this case it can five you more of an idea of how you express your emotions.

☾ 1st house - Aww sweetheart. With this placement, your emotions are front and centre. You wear your heart on your sleeve, and others may see you as deeply empathetic, nurturing, or emotionally expressive. Your moods are easily noticed by those around you, and you may come across as sensitive or reactive.

☾ 2nd house - You may come across very secure. However there may be fluctuations of how you feel which maybe largely due to how much you have, it could be intelligence, money or status. People may see you as protective of your resources and values, with a strong attachment to the things that provide comfort.You are possessive and dependable, and you be known to have a preference for a certain thing. You also may communicate about your status alot.

☾ 3rd house - This placement makes you emotionally expressive and talkative. Your instincts drive you to connect with others through words, making you relatable and engaging. People may see you as chatty, curious, and emotionally responsive. However, your thoughts and moods can shift quickly, sometimes making you appear inconsistent or restless.

☾ 4th house - Your emotions are deeply connected to your home, family, and personal life. People may perceive you as nurturing, protective, and deeply connected to your roots. You instinctively seek comfort in familiar environments and may prefer to keep your true self guarded until you feel secure. Emotional ties to your past can strongly shape your outward behavior.

☾ 5th house - Your soul is so closely linked to creativity, romance, and self-expression. You instinctively radiate warmth and affection, and people may view you as fun-loving, dramatic, or even flirtatious. Your moods can be playful and joyful, yet you may sometimes crave attention or validation through creative outlets or romantic pursuits.

☾ 6th house - Your inner wellbeing is tied to your routines, work habits, and sense of duty. You may present yourself as responsible and dependable, but you’re prone to anxiety or overworking when overwhelmed. People may admire your nurturing nature, especially in practical or caregiving roles. However, you may struggle to separate your feelings from your daily tasks.

☾ 7th house - Your emotions are strongly tied to your relationships. You instinctively seek emotional connection through partnerships. When interacting with others you do a wonderful job of focusing on them and enjoying spending one on one time with others. A truly beautiful placement to have. However you may also become overly dependent on others for emotional validation. Maintaining boundaries in relationships may be a challenge.

☾ 8th house - This placement creates an intense emotional presence. People may see you as mysterious, magnetic, or deeply introspective. You don't share your emotions with anyone. Your emotions tend to run deep, and you instinctively seek transformative experiences. However the feel of being betrayed by ones you care about run deep and affect how you interact with the world.

☾ 9th house - Your emotions are closely linked to travel, learning, and belief systems. Your head may be in the clouds a lot thinking about new beliefs and philosophies. People may see you as open-minded, adventurous, and emotionally inspired by new experiences. You thrive in environments that allow you to explore and grow, yet your emotions may become restless or idealistic if you feel confined.

☾ 10th house - Your emotions are tied to your public life and career. Others may see you as caring, empathetic, and emotionally invested in your reputation or achievements. Your moods may fluctuate based on your professional success, and you instinctively seek roles that allow you to nurture or guide others. However with such inner pressure on yourself others may see you as 'doing too much', or others may be jealous of your natural poise.

☾ 11th house - People may see you as caring, supportive, and emotionally connected to your community. You thrive in environments where you can nurture collective goals, yet you may struggle with feeling emotionally scattered or overly reliant on social acceptance. You may worry about humanitarian causes, which you are passionate about and that is very much seen through how you act.

☾ 12th house - People may perceive you as elusive, mysterious, or emotionally distant. You instinctively process your feelings in private, often retreating into solitude when overwhelmed. While this placement grants profound empathy and intuition, it may also bring struggles with hidden emotions, self-doubt, or feeling misunderstood.

DISCLAIMER: this post is a great generalisation and may not resonate with you. I would recommend buying a reading from a professional astrologer (or me) to get more insight

©️ 2025 honey-bitch All Rights Reserved

If you want me to analyse your ascendant persona chart Dm for Paid Readings

[snazzymolasses]

Also, ethics and morals are what make civilization. They are what making living in large groups of humans together possible.

If everyone just took what they wanted from everyone else, we would all be dead from the elements. The strength of humans comes from our togetherness and our cooperative nature. One guy spends all of his time growing food to feed us all, so that someone else has time to spin wool into clothing to keep us warm. The farmer gives the food to the spinner so that the spinner can eat, and spinner gives the farmer wool so the farmer can be warm. This is what anyone would consider a "fair trade", and it's what civilization is founded on, because there is too much work to be done for one person alone to do it.

If you just go to the farmer and take what you want without giving anything in return, you are a leech on society, and causing it's destruction, rather than building it up.

Now if you are a leech (ie: billionaire who is hoarding ALL the food and ALL the wool), the easiest way for you to stay a leech is to make sure people don't realize you're sapping all the productivity out of society, and the easiest way to do that is to call someone else a leech.

I was going to say "It's extremely sad how well this works," but actually, this works because of the inherit trust humans have in each other. Why would someone work towards harming the society that is protecting them and taking care of them? They wouldn't. A normal human would not do that, because that would mean their own destruction.

So yeah...there is something very, very, very wrong with the super-rich who not only hoard it all for themselves at the expense of others, but actually seem to enjoy doing so.

god I could be so wealthy if I had no ethics. that's so fucking frustrating. I'm living paycheck to paycheck because I'm not grifting vulnerable idiots on TikTok. I feel like I have the ability to very easily scam people. I could make a killing with AI. but god. I have morals and ethics and so I get to be poor as shit. I hate this fucking world

[unabletonotlovesatoru]

assassin nanami and his clueless little wife <33 (nsfw under the cut)

nanami is a man of precision, efficiency, and control. he doesn’t take unnecessary risks, doesn’t waste time, and certainly doesn’t make a spectacle out of his kills. everything is calculated, every movement precise. if he’s been assigned a target, they’re already as good as dead.

his presence is intimidating. dark suits, crisp and tailored to perfection, black gloves covering his hands at all times, and sharp eyes that don’t miss a single detail. he carries himself with a quiet authority that demands respect in the underworld. no one questions him. no one dares.

the left side of his face bears deep scars, remnants of a mission that didn’t go as planned. he never talks about them. when people ask, he merely stares them down until they drop the subject. the scars make him look even more menacing, but they don’t bother him—not like they used to.

he follows a strict routine every morning: wakes up before sunrise, trains to keep his body in peak condition, and goes over the details of his assignments with the utmost care. he’s meticulous, almost obsessive, when it comes to preparation. mistakes are unacceptable.

he prefers to keep his hands clean—silenced weapons, poison, or carefully orchestrated accidents. but if things do get messy, his knife work is terrifyingly efficient. he moves with deadly precision, wasting no energy, striking only where it matters.

despite the nature of his work, he carries himself like a gentleman—never crude, never reckless. in his world, those who act without thinking die the fastest.

his reputation is near-legendary. whispers follow him in the underworld—stories of his efficiency, his lack of hesitation, the way he never leaves a job unfinished. yet no one knows anything about his personal life, and he intends to keep it that way.

when the job is done, he disappears into the crowd, blending seamlessly into the life of a normal man. by the time he walks through the front door of your shared home, he’s no longer an assassin—he’s just your nanami, the tired salaryman who works too much and loves you more than anything.

the moment he steps into the house, all the weight he carries on his shoulders disappears. seeing you—your bright, warm smile, the way you rush up to hug him, wrapping your arms around his waist as if you’ve been waiting for him all day—reminds him why he does this. why he keeps going.

you are the light of his life, the only soft, pure thing in his otherwise dark existence. he protects you, shields you from the ugly truths of the world, ensuring that you never have to know the kind of violence he’s capable of.

you think he’s a normal salaryman working a stressful job. it explains why he always comes home so exhausted, why he rubs his temples and sighs when you ask about his day. “just meetings,” he tells you, pressing a tired kiss to your forehead. “the usual.”

you worry about him overworking himself, always fussing over his health. you make him sit down so you can massage his shoulders, your small hands kneading the tension from his muscles as you ramble about your day. he listens intently, eyes half-lidded, letting your voice ground him.

every morning, you pack his lunch with a little note tucked inside—sometimes a doodle, sometimes an encouraging message. “have a good day, kento! i love you ♡” he keeps every single one, folded neatly in his wallet, a secret reminder of what he’s fighting to protect.

you never question the way his reflexes are too sharp, how he catches things before they fall, or how his body tenses when you walk through crowded areas. you just assume he’s naturally overprotective. he keeps a hand on your lower back when you’re outside, guides you away from groups of strangers, and never lets you walk home alone.

he adores watching you do the most mundane things—humming while you cook, curling up on the couch with a book, getting excited over small things. it reminds him that there’s still good in the world, that not everything has to be soaked in blood and violence. sometimes, he just sits in the kitchen with a glass of whiskey, watching you move around, committing every detail to memory.

no matter how exhausted he is, he always makes time for you. you don’t even have to ask—his arms naturally find their way around you when you least expect it. he presses his forehead against yours, breathing you in, letting himself exist in this moment with you, away from the chaos of his real job.

he spoils you to an unreasonable degree. if you so much as glance at something while you’re out shopping, he’s buying it for you. you tell him he doesn’t have to, but he just responds, “it makes you happy, doesn’t it?” and that’s enough reason for him.

you love his hands—the way they’re always warm, the way they fit so perfectly when you intertwine your fingers. you don’t know how many lives those hands have taken. he lets you hold them as much as you want, lets you kiss his knuckles, never telling you how many times they’ve been bruised and bloodied.

when you ask about his scars, he always gives you a vague answer—“an accident at work.” you believe him, frowning as you trace the rough skin with delicate fingers. you kiss them so softly, like you think it’ll make them hurt less. he closes his eyes, letting himself pretend, just for a moment, that you’re right.

sometimes, he wakes up in the middle of the night, haunted by the things he’s done. you don’t ask questions—you just reach for him, wrapping yourself around him, pressing sleepy kisses to his chest. “i love you,” you mumble against his skin. and just like that, the nightmares fade.

he never lets you see him vulnerable, but there are moments when you catch glimpses—when he buries his face in your hair after a long day, holding you too tight, or when he lingers just a little longer in bed before leaving for “work,” pressing slow kisses to your shoulder as if he’s memorizing the feeling of you.

if anyone ever tried to hurt you, he wouldn’t hesitate. he’d burn the entire world down to keep you safe. you’ll never know the lengths he’s gone to in order to ensure that no harm ever comes your way. you’ll never know how many people he’s eliminated because they so much as looked at you the wrong way.

but he never wants you to know. never wants you to see the blood on his hands. to you, he’s just your loving husband, your overworked salaryman who brings you home flowers for no reason and kisses you awake every morning.

and as long as he can keep it that way, as long as you’re safe in his arms, he’s willing to carry the weight of his sins alone.

nanami is a patient man—until he isn’t. most of the time, he likes to take his time with you, savoring every little reaction, making sure you feel everything he does to you. but there are moments—moments when he comes home after a job, his suit still pristine but his head clouded with the weight of everything he’s done—where patience is the last thing on his mind. those nights, he kisses you the moment he steps through the door, hands gripping your waist, pulling you into him like he’s been starving for you. he lets out a deep, shaky breath against your lips, and when you ask what’s wrong, his voice is hoarse when he murmurs, “just need you, sweetheart.”

he thrives off your innocence. you have no idea how much it ruins him when you look up at him with those big, trusting eyes, so unaware of the kind of man he really is. it drives him insane—the contrast between his dark, violent world and the softness of you. he doesn’t deserve you, he knows that much, but that doesn’t mean he’ll ever let you go. he tells himself he’s keeping his distance, staying in control, but the moment you touch him—tracing your fingers over the scars on his face, pressing those feather-light kisses to his jaw—his composure shatters.

he’s impossibly composed—until you beg. nanami can resist anything except the sound of your voice when you plead for him, so breathless, so sweet. you don’t even realize what you do to him, how easily you can break him just by whispering please, kento in that shy little voice. his jaw tightens, his grip on you tenses, and the way his breath comes out heavier lets you know just how much he’s holding back. “do you have any idea what you’re asking for?” he murmurs, his lips brushing against your ear. you don’t answer, too lost in the way his fingers are teasing along your skin, but that’s okay—because he’s more than happy to show you.

his voice gets deeper, rougher when he’s in the mood. nanami already has a deep voice, but when he’s hovering over you, his lips ghosting over your skin, his words dark and teasing, it’s like pure sin. “you’re so easy to please,” he murmurs, watching you shiver beneath him. “so needy for me. you really have no idea what you do to me, do you?” and he’s right—you don’t know, don’t realize the restraint it takes for him to hold himself back, to take his time with you instead of ruining you the way he wants to. but when you whimper his name, gripping his shoulders like you’re desperate for more, he lets out a low chuckle. “impatient, aren’t we?”

he worships your body like it’s the only thing keeping him tethered to this world. his hands never stop moving, tracing every curve, every inch of soft skin, memorizing the way you tremble under his touch. his lips are everywhere—brushing against your throat, grazing over your collarbone, trailing lower and lower until your breath hitches. he loves hearing your reactions, loves how sensitive you are to the simplest touches. “so responsive,” he murmurs against your skin, smirking when you squirm beneath him. “you were made for me, weren’t you?”

nanami is a firm believer in eye contact. he wants to see you—wants to watch the way your breath catches, the way your lips part when he teases you, the way your eyes glaze over when he finally gives you what you want. if you try to look away, too shy to meet his gaze, he tilts your chin up with two fingers, forcing you to look at him. “don’t hide from me,” he murmurs, voice thick with something dark. “i want to see everything.”

he’s so careful with you—until he isn’t. he treats you like something delicate, something precious, because you are. but there are times when his self-control slips, when the weight of the world is too much, and the only thing keeping him sane is you. those nights, he’s rougher, needier, gripping your hips hard enough to leave bruises, his kisses desperate, consuming, hungry. but even then, even when he’s losing himself in you, he never forgets to check on you, murmuring against your lips, “is this okay?” and when you nod, breathless and wanting, he lets out a low groan and gives you exactly what you need.

his favourite thing is watching you lose yourself on his cock, doe eyes shiny with desire and chest heaving with panting, shallow breaths as you beg, and beg, and beg for him to fuck you, and nanami is a weak man when it comes to you. your cute little whines and wanton moans are the only thing he hears, your pleasure is the only thing he thinks about and your pussy makes him want to never stop fucking you because the warmth of it is as addicting as your pleas and expressions.

he’s possessive in the most devastating way. nanami is a man of control, a man who keeps his emotions in check—but when it comes to you, he can’t help himself. he doesn’t like when other men look at you for too long, doesn’t like when someone makes you laugh too much. he trusts you, of course, but that doesn’t stop the sharp edge of jealousy from creeping in. later, when it’s just the two of you, he reminds you exactly who you belong to. his lips trail along your skin, marking you in places only he will see, his voice low as he murmurs, “mine.”

aftercare is everything to him. no matter how intense things get, no matter how much he loses himself in the moment, he always takes care of you afterward. he pulls you close, pressing soft kisses to your temple, his voice warm and soothing as he whispers praises against your skin. he runs his hands up and down your back, grounding both of you in the aftermath, making sure you know just how much he loves you. and when you finally drift off to sleep, curled up against his chest, he watches you for a long time, fingers threading through your hair, the ghost of a smile on his lips.

and in those quiet moments, as he holds you close, nanami lets himself believe—if only for a little while—that he’s not the monster the world has made him out to be. because in your arms, he’s not an assassin. he’s just a man who loves his wife more than anything.

[gloomwitchwrites]

Dog with No Teeth // Chapter One

Simon "Ghost" Riley x Female Reader

Chapter Specific Warnings (MDNI): post-apocalypse au, swearing, canon-typical violence, threatening language, death of a minor character

Word Count: 4.6k

On a scavenging run, two unknown groups arrive unannounced. Through the gunfire, you’re separated, cornered, captured. A skull-faced Lieutenant makes a decision, changing your life forever.

ao3 // main masterlist // dog with no teeth masterlist

Eden is a home.

It is a person. A place. A community

It is the scent of old musty books, and the quiet peace before the rising dawn.

You work by candlelight in the silent hours, an open book resting on the table in front of you. Wearing gloves to protect it, you carefully turn the page, gaze scanning the faded lettering. Most of it is legible, and with some time and care, you’ll be able to replicate it on new paper with fresh ink.

Preservation.

Not of your mortal life and those that live in your community, but the preservation of humanity, culture, and human history. Five years since the world fell apart, and yet you remain, carrying on with purpose, restoring books, transcribing those that are close to falling apart, and keeping records of the years that came before.

It is enjoyable, fulfilling work but you serve a greater need to your community. Here, within your sanctuary of several hundred people, you provide them entertainment and education. The children come to you for picture books and story time, and the adults visit when they need an escape.

You are but one piece of a large whole.

“What are you doing here so early?”

You glance up, smiling at your assistant. “Could ask the same,” you laugh, pushing back from the table. Standing, you remove your gloves and set them next to the book.

Sam, your archiving assistant yawns. “Thought I’d get here early since you’re going out today with Zac and his group.” They rub at their eyes. “Shouldn’t you be at the gate already?”

“Shit,” you mutter, checking the mechanical clock hanging on the wall. Sam is right. You should be at the gate right now. “Double shit,” you groan.

Sam laughs and reaches for their own gloves. “I’ll handle this.” Putting them on, Sam settles into your chair. “We doing a refurb on this?”

“No,” you say, running around the room, grabbing your jacket and backpack. “Some of the pages are too faded. Binding is also bust.”

“Transcribe then,” murmurs Sam, gently closing the book to inspect the integrity of the cover. “Where are you going again?”

“Zac mentioned a small town they scoped out. No activity.” You walk over to Sam, yanking your jacket on. “He said there’s a library.”

Sam’s head pops up. “Seriously?”

You nod excitedly. “Said the place was locked up tight. Windows still intact.”

“Untouched?” asks Sam, eyebrows rising in surprise. You nod. Sam whistles lowly. “What a fucking find.”

“I know!” you exclaim. “Could really use some encyclopedias.”

“And dictionaries,” adds Sam longingly.

Tugging on the front of your jacket and then smoothing the front, you zip it up. “Zac said I can bring back as much as I want.”

“Did he really?” Sam shakes their head and opens the front cover of the book. “That man is sweet on you.”

“Which is why I take advantage,” you giggle.

Sam bursts out laughing. “Go. They’ll leave you behind.”

With a grin on your face and a hop to your step, you wave at Sam before heading out the side door and into the early morning. The sun is just starting to rise. Most people are still asleep or starting their day. You walk by the communal buildings where the earliest risers are preparing breakfast. You sigh when you get a whiff of what they’re cooking, wishing you could snag a meal before departing.

As you approach the gate, Zac raises his hand in greeting.

“Have I held everyone up?” you ask tentatively, glancing around.

“Not at all. Still loading up a few things. Your timing is perfect.” Zac smiles, and though you find him pleasant, nothing stirs within you. There is no lust or even romantic interest.

You observe the line of cars queued at the gate. Usually there are only one or two, but there are at least ten vehicles here including the salvaged U-Haul. “Taking a whole convoy?”

“We’re going to need it.”

“For a small town?”

Zac chuckles. “I’m dropping you off at the library. Ben will come with you.”

“I get a security detail?” you ask excitedly and Zac nods. “Fancy.”

Zac scratches at his neck, gaze roaming over the convoy. “There’s a car assembly plant a few miles outside the town. Gonna strip what we can. If things go well, we’ll come back.”

“No activity then?”

“None,” confirms Zac. “We’ve had a scouting team out there for the last two months. Not a soul has passed through.”

“That’s fortunate,” you murmur.

While your community has been largely untouched and unbothered by the outside world, there are still so many unknowns. There have been stragglers that have shown up, and while several have been accepted in and integrated, there are many more that have been turned away or shot on sight. Sometimes you think it cruel, but there are all sorts of horrors in the world now.

Ben walks around the front of the nearest car, and beams in your direction. “Hear I’m looking after you today,” he says, going in for a hug.

You accept it easily. Ben is the comedian of the community, always having a kind word and funny joke.

“And helping me haul books,” you add.

Ben winks in your direction and then turns to Zac. “We’re ready.”

Zac nods. “Load up!” he shouts.

Everyone around you heads to their designated vehicle. Engines roar and car doors slam. You follow Ben, hopping into a dusty Jeep Wrangler.

It’s several hours of open road and clear weather.

You and Ben pass the time by singing songs and playing car games. It’s a good distraction until Zac comes on over the radio and tells Ben their exit is coming up. The rest of the convoy drives on as Ben cuts away to take an exit ramp. A few more minutes and he’s coming to a stop just on the edge of town, parking the Jeep amongst a cluster of trees. The vehicle is completely hidden.

“Ready?” he asks, sliding the keys into his pocket.

“Backpack? Check. Gun? Check. Foldable wagon? Check.”

Ben blows raspberries. “Can’t forget the foldable wagon.”

You playfully smack him on the arm. “You want to haul all those books back yourself.”

“No thank you,” he mutters.

The walk is pleasant, but overall silent. Ben carries an M4AI. The arsenal back home is massive, and whenever there are trips outside the compound, the military-grade weapons come out. He keeps his head on a swivel, but other than the occasional animal sounds and the rustling of leaves, all is quiet.

“Here it is,” sighs Ben, extending one arm toward a stand-alone building at the corner of an intersection.

The library isn’t overly big. If anything, it’s what you’d expect from a small town.

“Now I know you’re excited,” he begins, slightly leaning in your direction. “But you stay close. We’re entering from the back.”

All you can do is nod eagerly, words escaping you. It’s been almost six years since you’ve been inside a library. This is a treat. It takes an insane amount of self-control to not skip all the way to the back of the building.

While the front of the building faces the intersection, behind the library is a small parking lot and two dumpsters. Ben does a slow sweep of the lot as the two of you walk toward the employee entrance. Satisfied that nothing and no one is around, Ben lowers his gun. Removing his backpack, he sets it on the ground, and rummages around inside before withdrawing lockpicks.

Adrenaline surges within you.

A few wiggles.

And then—

Click.

Grinning like an idiot, Ben slips the lockpicks into his backpack and puts it on. Grabbing his gun, he presses himself to the brick wall. Slowly, Ben opens the door with the tip of the rifle. It gives under his touch easily, the hinges even silent as the door swings inwards.

“Draw your weapon,” whispers Ben. “We need to do a sweep first.” As you reach for your Glock, Ben shakes his head. “And leave the damn wagon.”

Leaning the foldable wagon against the wall, you remove your gun from its holster. Ben enters and you follow, shifting your body to watch for anything coming up behind you. It’s a slow sweep. Starting along the wall, the two of you walk the perimeter, checking the back offices, and then finally the center-most area.

Ben comes to a stop near a collection of dusty chairs. Lowering his gun, he sighs with relief. “It’s clear.” He turns in your direction. “I’ll be keeping a lookout at the door. If anything happens, you come directly to me.”

“Got it,” you say with a mock salute.

Ben rolls his eyes but he’s smiling. “And don’t drag those books along because I know you will. Leave them.”

You stare him down but Ben doesn’t budge, matching your stare with one of his own. “I mean it. If someone or something comes barreling through the front doors, you fucking run to me. Understood?”

“Sure. Got it. Understood.”

Ben checks his watch. “We have a few hours before we’re expected back at the meet point. Take your time.” He starts to walk away, and then abruptly pivots. “Wife packed a few sandwiches. Promise I’ll share.”

You snort and wave him off. “Bring me my wagon, Ben.”

“On it,” he calls over his shoulder.

As his footfalls recede, you linger in the quiet, dusty library, taking in the significance of the moment. Six years since you’ve stood inside an actual library. Five years since the world fell apart but a year before, third places were quickly disappearing. No one could spend money when wages were low and all the government’s resources were going toward the war effort. Libraries and free spaces shuttered first, losing all their funding.

This place is precious. Special. A rare opportunity.

Of all the books in your community’s collection, they’ve all come to you by the way of others, collected on routine trips and scavenging missions like today. Since stepping inside the walls you now call home, this is the first time you’ve left it. All the stories you receive of the outside world come from the mouths of those who witness it firsthand.

Like a jubilant child, you want to run around—to touch everything. The tips of your fingers buzz with an incessant itch. But you don’t dare remove anything from the shelves. Resisting is almost physically painful as you float through the aisles, taking it all in. To remove a book off the shelf, to open it up, the smell it and feel it would be paradise.

But you know better. You do.

Disturbing them without the right tools and care might cause damage or undo exposure. What you can do is look, to read the spines, and consider your options. Once you know what you want, you’ll drag your little wagon behind you and go about taking the books you want off the shelves.

Ben does leave you alone, and you’re left to wander.

Each step is light but purposeful as you move about the space. You think of everyone back home, of their likes and dislikes, of their needs and wants. More picture books would be helpful as well as some young adult novels. Some of the women have been asking for romance and few of the older folks would like some historical nonfiction.

“Where are you?” you mutter, digging around in your jacket pockets.

Crumpled paper brushes against your fingers. Withdrawing it, you smooth it out as best you can. Using the little light available to read your scribbled penmanship, you pull the wagon behind you, mentally reordering your notes by priority.

Sam wants dictionaries, and you need to grab a set of encyclopedias. Finding the “Reference” section, you survey all your options. Dictionaries and an encyclopedia set are a must, but you also consider the selections of atlases and then the thesaurus collection. The school could really use those resources, and your wagon is large enough to accommodate a few last-minute additions.

Kneeling, you admire the different editions of encyclopedias. Some appear a little worn but otherwise fine. Even though this place hasn’t had power or temperature control in five years, the place was sealed and untouched until you and Ben. It’s likely that everything inside is fine, and all you and Sam will need to do is a rebinding.

You’re completely absorbed, so focused on the tomes in front of you, that the whisper of your name has you spinning around and reaching for your gun.

Ben has his hands up in front of him in a placating gesture. A snarky remark sizzles on your tongue. Ben brings a finger to his mouth in a gesture of silence. Whatever you were going to say dissolves, leaving behind an acrid aftertaste.

Slowly, you swivel your head from side to side but see nothing.

Ben shifts closer, leans in, a glint of fear in his eyes.

“There are people outside,” he whispers.

That’s when you hear it. Distantly, you hear a car door slam, and a muffled shout. The marrow in your bones becomes ice. There are people. There shouldn’t be people.

You swallow, mouth becoming dry. “How many?”

Ben shrugs. “Not sure. But there’s two groups.”

“Two—” You shake your head slightly as that’ll clear your racing thoughts. “What do you mean two groups?”

Ben’s mouth turns downward. It’s an I’m sorry but even that is loaded.

We’re not getting out of this.

There’s a distant hoot of laughter, and then the breaking of glass as if someone’s thrown a beer bottle. It’s still far enough away that you cling to that one comfort. But if they stick around, they might come sniffing. If that happens, you and Ben will be cornered.

Ben nods his head in the direction of the front of the library. Staying low, the two of creep toward the front of the building. There are two sets of double doors. The first set open up into the library and the secondary set of doors lead directly outside. Sandwiched between them is a small atrium. Above the doors are massive windows that bring in natural light.

Out front in the intersection are several beaten up trucks. From what you can see, it’s all men, at least a dozen or two in total. They look haggard. Mean.

“Is that them?” you ask softly.

Ben doesn’t look back at you as he answers. “Just the one. These guys came in loud.” Ben shifts slightly to glance over his shoulder at you. “Surprised you didn’t hear them.”

“Lost in my books.” Ben snorts, and returns his attention to the glass doors. “What about the second group?” you ask tentatively. “Our people?”

Ben eases back a bit. He sits down on the floor, checking over his rifle. “No. Not sure who they are.” He licks his lips, gaze focused on the gun. “They’re all in black. Militarized by the look of them. Organized.”

Two groups. Two different groups.

Ben removes the clip and checks the cartridge. “Only noticed them when one of these guys went around back.” He gestures toward the men directly outside the front doors. “Fucker came out of nowhere and knifed him. Dragged his body away too.”

“Who are they?”

Ben shrugs and rummages in his backpack for a new clip. “No fucking idea. The ones out front might be marauders or slavers or—”

He pauses, gaze growing distant.

“Or what, Ben?” you prompt.

He doesn’t answer, only readies the rifle. “All I know is we need to go.”

All this work, all this effort, suddenly gone.

Your shoulders sag as the reality of the situation sets in. “I have to leave the books. Don’t I?”

“Afraid so,” replies Ben. But he smiles, and though he’s trying, you see the strain. “Next time I’ll make sure to bring you and Sam some books.”

“Promise?”

“Promise,” he affirms. “Let’s go.”

At the back door, you withdraw your Glock, posting up beside Ben. He cracks it open. Pauses. Opens it a little wider. He carefully sticks a small hand mirror out the opening. He turns it left then right then back again.

“Clear” he says, voice barely above a whisper.

He exits slowly, and then gestures with his hand. You step outside, squinting slightly as your eyes adjust to the light. Ben starts to cross the parking lot, heading for the exit furthest from the intersection.

The voices of the men are louder out here. A tiny bubble of panic blooms. Then simmers. Then boils.

There is no one around. No one. And yet—

A loud crack splits the air. The wall next to Ben explodes, tiny fragments of debris bursting outward. Ben stumbles backward. He grabs for you. And tugs.

You’re yanked to the side, and then spun around.

Time seems to slow, and yet everything occurs so quickly you don’t entirely comprehend what’s happened until Ben shoves the two of you behind a nearby dumpster.

“Oh, fuck,” you breathe. “Ben. We—”

Horror floods your lungs.

Blood.

Everything. Dripping from tiny holes in Ben’s body.

“Oh my god. Ben.”

You reach for him, but there are so many impact points. Too many.

“Go,” he gasps. “Go.”

“I’m not leaving you here.”

As the words leave your mouth, a barrage of bullets bite into the wall directly over your head.

“Here,” he rasps, handing you the keys to the Jeep. “Leave me and fucking run. I’ll distract them.”

Shouting breaks out nearby followed by what seems like a never-ending deluge of gunfire.

Your eyes burn. “You promised me books.”

He smiles, and there’s more red than white. “You know I always deliver on my promises.”

With a groan that’s more a cry of pain, Ben stands and reloads with a new clip.

“Go,” he whispers just as he steps out from around the dumpster, gun firing.

You turn. Take off. Gunfire follows.

It comes from everywhere, but you don’t falter, don’t pause to check your surroundings. You’re not a raging bull or an agile cheetah. You are pure frenzy, pure panic, like a rabbit running from fox teeth.

“Fucking grab her!” someone yells. “Grab her!”

You don’t know if it’s the marauders or the men all in black, but there is little reason to consider who.

Survival is paramount. Survival is eternal.

In a world like this, survival is lifeblood.

It is everything.

With lungs burning and muscles screaming, you aim for the houses, knowing you can lose them if you scuttle through the overgrown backyards.

The blow comes out of nowhere.

You witness a brief taste of freedom.

And then it’s yanked right from under you.

A body barrels into you, knocking you sideways. The ground comes up fast. You throw up your arms to protect your head and face. It cushions but protects little else. You hit hard.

“Come here,” growls a male voice. Hands are on you. Grabbing. Twisting. “Let me get a good look at you.”

You kick out. Throw your fists in all directions.

“Stop your fussing.”

A quick blow to the face and you’re circling, everything becoming temporarily blurry as the person atop you brings your vision skyward.

 “Look at you,” he laughs.

It’s one of the marauders. He smiles down at you, teeth brown and grey from decay.

“Pretty thing. Gonna look cute choking on my—”

His nefarious smile drops as the rest of him stiffens. You freeze, staring up in shock as you try to figure out what’s happened. It’s a slow unfolding. A trickle. Blood begins to pool in his mouth and then it drip drip drips onto your face.

With a soft cry, you wiggle out from under him as he tips over, falling into the grass. Scrambling backward, you start to push up onto your knees, muscles poised to keep moving.

“Don’t move.” A gun barrel presses into the back of your head. It’s still warm. “Get up.”

A pair of black boots come into view. Your gaze slowly ascends. Black boots give way to black pants to a black bullet proof vest to a black balaclava. The only part of him you can see are his eyes.

Someone grabs the back of your neck. It’s a harsh hold, and you’re yanked to your feet. You twist your neck and find another man, this one almost identical to the one in front of you. This is the other group Ben spotted, the ones tracking the marauders.

The one holding your neck squeezes and the other reaches for you. “Fucking move and I’ll shoot you.”

You remain perfectly still—perfectly silent as he pats you down. The knife in your boot is confiscated along with your Glock. When they snatch the Jeep keys, you instinctually reach to take them back.

“Told you not to fucking move.”

The man slaps your hand down and you feel the muzzle return to your head.

“Sorry,” you murmur.

He stares you down for a long moment. It gives you an opportunity to observe him, and his companion. They both wear identical all-black tactical even down to the patches attached to their biceps. The bottom one you recognize. Both American flags. The one above it is eerily similar but you can’t entirely place it. It’s an azimuthal projection of the earth but a top view from the North Pole. Beneath it are two olive branches.

The stranger’s gaze shifts to just above you. He jerks his head, and then you’re shoved forward without warning. With each of them holding an arm, you’re half-dragged back to the intersection the marauders were at.

While their rusty trucks are still there, they aren’t alone. Four armored trucks are parked in a semi-circle around the marauders’ cars. More men in all-black tactical gear prowl the area. Of the first group to arrive, those that aren’t dead have been zip tied and lined up in a row on their stomachs, faces pressed into the asphalt.

When one of them moves, they’re kicked until they fall back into compliance.

“Found this one out by the houses,” says the man holding onto your left arm.

Soldiers. They have to be. This isn’t some ragtag group. They wear uniforms, all of which are perfectly maintained. Even the armored trucks are in decent condition.

A small trio of them standing nearby turn.

The centermost soldier speaks. “A woman?” His surprise is clear. And like the two men who hold you, this man too has an American flag.

He nods toward the group of facedown marauders. “These fuckers don’t let their breeders out of their sight.”

Breeders.

You almost snarl, bite back with an insult. But you keep your mouth shut. Their intentions are unclear, and you’re without a weapon. Entirely powerless.

Survival. Always survival.

He takes a few steps forward, approaching you, gaze assessing. Behind the balaclava, he gives you a once over. “Looks healthy,” he observers. Without warning, he grabs your face. You jerk back, and he clucks his tongue. “Stop moving.”

Turning your face to the left and then to the right, the middle of his brow creases. “Open your mouth.”

You glower, and don’t comply.

He grabs your nose, shutting off your air. You gasp, mouth opening.

“Has all her teeth,” he announces, dropping his hand. “Can’t be one of theirs.”

“We need to show the Lieutenant,” says the soldier to your right.

The man before you stares, and keeps staring. “Do we?”

You don’t like the implication.

“What’s this?”

A deep, masculine voice cuts through the air. It is accented. British. Every head turns, and the soldiers straighten, shoulders back and heads held high.

The man holding your left arm speaks up. “Found her running toward the houses, Lieutenant.”

All the soldiers wear plain black balaclavas. Simple. Straightforward. But the man who steps into view has a skull face stitched into his. A fucking skull.

Instead of an American flag, it’s a Union Jack.

His brown eyes behind the mask narrow. “They don’t bring their women out.”

“That’s what I said.”

“Are their numbers that low?”

“With how we’ve been picking them off I wouldn’t be surprised.”

They bicker back and forth, arguing about you but not actually talking to you.

“I’m not with them,” you say, and they all go silent.

Skull Face glowers. “You’re not?”

“I was running from them.” You glance between the soldiers who shot the man. “They’ll tell you. They’re the ones that shot him.”

Skull Face appears unmoved. “Doesn’t mean you’re not with them.”

You laugh, and it sounds a bit hysterical. “Why would I be fucking running if I were with them? Wouldn’t I be shooting back at you?”

“No,” he replies flatly. “If you were with them, you’d be bloody running from them. Not shooting at us.”

“She has to be with them. There’s no one else here.” The man who speaks up this time is directly to Skull Face’s right. The accent is different. Scottish.

“I came with one other. Those men shot at us.”

Ben. Oh. Sweet Ben.

“And where are they?” asks Skull Face.

You swallow, knowing the truth. “Behind the library. Parking lot. Near the dumpster.”

Skull Face locks gazes with another solider and nods. Two men break off, heading in that direction. He returns his attention to you. “Who are these men?”

“What?” you ask, perplexed.

“These men.” He points to the facedown marauders. “Who are they?”

These men are strangers to you. “Slavers?” When no one confirms or denies, you guess again. “Cannibals?”

“She’s playing dumb,” mutters the Scots.

“Hush, Soap,” mutters Skull Face.  “Who are they? What name do they go by? It’s an easy question. Everyone knows it.”

You shake your head. “I—I don’t know.”

Lieutenant Skull Face leans in, lowering his voice. “If you don’t answer truthfully, you and I can have an extended chat in the back of one of these trucks.”

“She had these.” The Jeep keys are tossed, and he catches them without looking. “And this.” The Glock is presented.

Soap takes the Glock. He turns it over. “They don’t give their women weapons, Ghost.”

So, Skull Face is named Ghost. Fitting.

“No,” he agrees. “Makes it easier for them to fight back.”

The very idea sobers you.

“Who are they?” you ask, feeling safe enough to do so.

Ghost glances up from the car keys. “Your worst fucking nightmare.”

“Lieutenant!” The two men that left for the library return. Jogging forward, they speak in low voices.

Ben is not with them. Ben is—

Ghost nods and steps back. “We’re taking her with us.” The two men holding onto your arms let go and Ghost immediately grabs hold of your shoulder, pulling you forward.

“Pick three of these bastards at random,” he announces, gesturing toward the facedown men. “Put them in Delta truck. Shoot the rest.”

Ghost’s hand at your shoulder slides up, grasping the back of your neck. He leans in close—so close you can pick out the little flecks of gold in his brown irises.

“You’re riding with me.”

taglist:

@glitterypirateduck @suhmie @z-wantstowrite @kylies-love-letter @keiva1000

@iloveslasher @ravenpoe67 @sadlonelybagel @nishim @arrozyfrijoles23

@voids-universe @itsberrydreemurstuff @sageyxbabey @glassgulls @miaraei

@weasleytwins-41 @eternallyvenus @chaostwinsofdestruction @cherryofdeath @ninman82

@fern-reads @waves-against-a-cliff @beebeechaos @smileykiddie08 @whisperwispxx

@jianyi22 @sethell @atpeacee @konigssweatyhood @dreamingoftomorrow

@katerinaval @morguethemagpie @galactict3a @sarah-the-bird-nerd @mikachu-bitez

@unclearblur @kurochan3

[luv-lock]

Thinking about what the invincible variants were thinking when they see the mainstream alien!reader... Now think about what the variants talking about their respective alien!reader when they were stuck in the wasteland dimension (⁠◡⁠ ⁠ω⁠ ⁠◡⁠)

Oh, this is good. Imagine all the different Invincible variants stuck in that wasteland dimension, looking at each other, realizing just how different their relationships with their respective alien readers are. Some of them probably think they got the best version. Others? Yeah… not so much. For the sake of it let's pretend main Mark is there too.

When They See the Mainstream Alien Reader

The first thing they all notice? She’s normal. Well, as normal as a Qu can be. She’s protective, strong, and yeah, a little terrifying when it comes to keeping Mark safe, but she’s not trying to conquer planets, not committing genocide, and definitely not treating Mark like a glorified blood bag or a means to an end. She actually cares about him.

Sinister Mark? He’s looking at her like she’s an alien in a way he’s never seen before. “Wait, she doesn’t eat people?” He doesn’t get it. How is she not constantly dripping in blood? How does she not rule over something? More importantly, how does this Mark have all his limbs intact?

Viltrumite Mark? He just stares because, honestly, he can’t even imagine a version of his wife who isn’t sick and frail. His version can barely keep her eyes open half the time, and here’s this one, standing beside her Mark, fully awake and looking healthy. He hates how much that pisses him off.

Mohawk Mark? He just laughs. “Oh, so you actually like her? That’s cute.” His Y/n only cares about herself, so the idea of one actually prioritizing Mark is just hilarious to him. He calls it pathetic, but deep down, he wonders what it’s like to have a partner who gives a shit.

When They Talk About Their Own Alien Readers

Eventually, when they’re stuck in the wasteland long enough, they start talking. And the more they talk, the more they realize… some of them are in absolute hell.

Normal Mark (Mainstream)

"So, uh… you guys don’t have this? Y’know, a wife who actually cares about you?"

He’s confused. How did he get the best version of her? Why are all their relationships so weird? His Y/n follows him everywhere, sure, but she doesn’t treat him like shit, doesn’t use him, and she’s a great mom.

The more he listens to them, the more he realizes just how insane their versions are.

He starts feeling lucky. Really lucky.

Sinister Mark

"Yeah, no, I don’t want yours. I like mine just the way she is."

He adores his version. Is it toxic? Absolutely. Do they kill together? Yes. Do they sometimes eat people together? Also yes.

He doesn’t understand how anyone could be satisfied with a Qu who isn’t a complete monster.

He’s also lowkey judging Viltrumite Mark. “Dude, you have her locked up? She’s your prisoner? What the hell is wrong with you?”

Viltrumite Mark

"You wouldn’t understand. She’s fragile. She needs me."

He acts like he’s got everything under control, but the more he listens to how alive everyone else’s versions are, the more he starts questioning things.

He convinces himself that his Y/n being weak is a good thing. That it makes her special.

But there’s a part of him that wonders what it would be like to have a version of her that wasn’t always sick, that didn’t need to be locked away.

Mohawk Mark

"Bro, mine’s just in it for the sex. She doesn’t even remember my name half the time."

He thinks it’s hilarious. Everyone else is talking about how they have some kind of relationship with their Y/n, meanwhile, he’s just out here dealing with the most selfish version possible.

He doesn’t care, though. He enjoys himself. He gets what he wants, and so does she.

But after hearing everyone else talk, a small part of him wonders what it would be like to actually have a real connection. Not just physical, but actual affection. He’d never admit it, though.

How the Conversation Ends

By the end of it, Normal Mark is sitting there like, "Damn. I really won, huh?" Meanwhile, Viltrumite Mark is trying to convince himself he’s happy, Sinister Mark is fully convinced he has the best version of all time, and Mohawk Mark is just vibing, pretending he’s fine.

Honestly, if they ever got out of that wasteland, I wouldn’t be surprised if some of them started questioning their entire existence.

[court-jester-stuff]

I very much agree with this. On one hand i do feel the need to say that we don't know a lot about regulus so he might as well have been a DE out of free will, however he was also born into a family where such believes were normalized. He was raised to believe all of that and its very fair to assume that becoming a DE was more of an expectation then a choice. In the end he also did change, he cared for Kreacher and did what he could to protect him.

What we don't know is if he believed in pureblood supremacy but i feel that's for own interpretation. (Personally, i believe he didn't know better, based on the way he was raised and such.) I believe that if Serius had gotten him out of that house and away from that family when he decided to leave (which preach, good he got out and got a good family) I do think he would've been a good person and been a great asset in the war against Voldy. He was one of the biggest reasons as to how Harry found the horcruxs, say what you want but that teenager died defying the man everyone feared.

On the other hand we have snape, who during his time as a student called his ONLY friend a slur used on people who were (i think?) being actively killed at the time. Snape had no reason to think this way or say what he said, so why did he do it? He insulted his only friend and when she decided to stop being friends with him he got upset. (Besides that he himself was muggleborn, ‘the half blood prince’ dumbass name btw, so why did he do that??)

Besides that, we have the fact that Lily loved James and not Snape. Lily didn't choose James over Snape, she simply chose James, which is a separate matter from Snape having been cruel to her in such a manner. Snape didn't have anything to do with that and yet he despised James for it. So much so that he bullied/treated his, but also her, son unfairly.

On top of that we have the fact that the only reason why he decided to become a spy was because Voldy began targeting Lily, not because he realized he was in the wrong or that the DE’s are bad. He only switched sides for his obsession with Lily. I fully believe that had it not been for Lily that he would’ve been Voldy’s most loyal DE till his death.

I saw someone say that he loved Lily and wasn’t obsessed but that’s not true. I saw someone else (I don’t remember where or who) make a very good point of James and Lily having fitting patronus, a stag and a doe compliment each other. They are their own people, but they work together. Snape had Lily’s doe, why? He doesn’t match her, he HAS her. Weird in my opinion.

On top of being all that, the man was unfair to any students that weren’t in his house, mainly the Gryffindor’s. Neville watched/had his parents be tortured to insanity by Bellatrix and yet she wasn’t the one that walked out of that closet. It was Snape. This teacher was so cruel to a child that he became the thing the kid feared the most. That’s fucked up.

In the first scene we have of him he asks Harry, a boy raised by muggles and who was cut off by any and all types of magic his whole life, an advanced question. Which I’m pretty sure was a trick question cuz the two things were the same, but don’t quote me on that.

Snape wasn’t good. Ever. He had an insane obsession with Lily, she was the sole reason as to why he decided to help the Order. Not because he believed in their beliefs. Snape was a terrible person and most definitely not the hero some make him out to be.

"you can't defend regulus and not defend snape"

actually, yes, i can. watch me.

snape was a child abuser, who regularly insulted, embarrassed and physically injured his students on a daily basis. he only was part of the order bc he had an unhealthy obsession with his childhood bestfriend, who he called a slur on several occasions. who he, on top of trying to kill her husband, didn't care about her child or family until her life was in danger. he only became "good" when the woman who had rejected him several times might have been injured. he was such a terrible teacher and human being, that one of his student's BIGGEST FEAR was him. he was racist and a blood supremecist, even though he was a half a blood himself. he was not "morally gray", he was a horrible person.

regulus black was forced to become a death eater by his family, and in the end, betrayed voldemort and gave up his life to try to end the war. he loved his house elf, and did everything to make sure kreacher made it out alive. he was not an abuser, he was the abused.

so, yes, i can defend regulus and not defend snape.

[zaunitelabs]

Can I request dating headcanons for Vander, Jayce, Viktor, Silco, and Ekko with gender neutral s/o please?

Arcane Headcanons - Dating

Characters: Vander, Jayce, Viktor, Silco, Ekko

TW: none

Have fun!! Request are still open btw🫶‼️

.-.

Vander

Veryyyy gentle lover

A very soft spoken partner, loves to call you pet names

Words of affirmation are probably his form of showing affection

He’s not super touchy in public. It’s not that he doesn’t like physical touch, the opposite actually, he finds it sacred. In public he’ll only grab your hand, maybe caress your arm

When it’s just the two of you however, he cannot keep his hands to himself. You are in the kitchen? He’s hanging around like a lost dog behind you. You are reading a book? He’ll make you cuddle with him while you read

Vander would be incredibly protective of you, always making sure you are safe and well taken care of, but he’d do so in a calm and gentle way

He’s tough, but he never wants to make you feel small or incapable

SUCHHHH an old school loverboy. He’d be the type to open doors for you or ensure you never walk on the outer side of the sidewalk

Vander would prefer spending quiet nights together rather than going out. Whether it’s cuddling by the fire, cooking together, or just talking

Jayce

SOOOOOO needy

Love language is definitely physical touch, he cannot keep his hands off of you. From holding hands, cuddles, caresses, everything and anything that transmits his warmth to you

A terrible cook, not for lack of trying, but rather because he never has had the time to practice. Even so he tries to make you breakfast every chance he gets before he goes to the lab

His favourite way to unwind after work is to cuddle with you, his head on your lap or shoulder as you caress his hair as he rambles about his day

He loves to show you off at events. His hand never leaves your side, and if it ever for some reason happen his eyes would never leave your presence

As someone who values innovation and progress, Jayce would be incredibly supportive of his your ambitions, encouraging them to chase your dreams, no matter how big or small

He would prefer to separate his work like from his love life, opting to keep his lover away from the lab. He does however secretly enjoy whenever you pop in for a quick visit

Would try to make your life easier with the help of his inventions in any way he could. Known for loosing track of time? Jayce’s got it covered and will have an artifact to help you made in no time

Though he appears to be fairly stern and commanding, he’s the biggest sweetheart. He’s acts like a puppy in love when he’s with you, like the good boy he is

Viktor

A very reserved lover

While not the most physically affectionate, he makes his love to you known through actions. Always making two coffees, always grabbing a sweet treat on his way home to share after work, always bringing your scarf along if it’s cold outside

He isn’t overly expressive with words, but his actions speak volumes. He might not shower you with grand romantic speeches, but his presence and the way he looks at you convey his deep feelings. His physical affection could be soft but sincere, like holding your hand or brushing your hair out of your face

Cherishes and enjoys the quite moments he gets to spend with his partner like reading together

Will only go to fancy events if his partner wants to go with him. If he were to go alone he’d drink enough to be sent back home within an hour of the event starting, on purpose of course

Will remember all of the ‘insignificant’ stuff you have ever said. You like calico cats? Noted. Your favourite hobby as a kid? oh yeah he remembers. The song playing when you two had your first date? Constantly plays in the back of his head whenever he needs to cool down at work

Viktor doesn’t have time for drama or playing games in relationships. What you see is what you get, and he values honesty and directness

Just like Jayce, Viktor would encourage his partner and their dreams, doing everything he cans to help them accomplish them

While he might get absorbed in his scientific pursuits, Viktor would also make sure to carve out time for you. However, he might get a bit distracted when talking about his work, so you’ll have to find ways to balance both his love for invention and his affection for you

Silco

The most jealous out of the bunch. He cherishes his partner as though they were something sacred. In his eyes no one could ever be worthy to be in your presence

Possessive, but (surprisingly) not in a toxic way. In public his hand would be glued to yours, or placed around your lower back. He needs to make it known that you are with him

Would give you the whole world if you’d ask him to. Once Silco is committed to you, his loyalty is unwavering. He doesn’t believe in half-measures or distractions, and his devotion to you would be total. You’d always have his trust and allegiance, no matter what

While Silco isn’t one to shower you with words of affection, when he does speak, it’s sincere and impactful. His "I love you" would come less often but carry more weight. He’d show his love through the way he holds you—firm, unyielding, and always with the promise of safety.

With that being said his favourite way to address his partner would be by calling you ‘my love’ . No matter if it’s in public or in the privacy of your home, he’d proudly call you my love any chance he got

In moments of intimacy, Silco would be raw and intense, showing you a side of him that's often hidden from everyone else. His passion would be undeniable, and it would come with a fire that burns deep and leaves you feeling wanted and cherished in ways that few could match

Silco would start his mornings by making you coffee or tea just the way you like it. You’d rather have something else? He’ll move hell and earth to get it to you. Even on the most hectic of days, he’d take the time to make sure your first sip of the day is perfect, and he’d enjoy sitting with you in comfortable silence while you both wake up together

While Silco can be intense, he'd also show a lighter side through playful teasing. He’d make subtle remarks that get you to laugh, his way of showing affection through humor. He’d love seeing you smile, and sometimes he’d tease you just to make you blush

Sometimes, Silco would take you out for a quiet night under the stars, away from the noise of the city. There, he’d just sit with you, enjoying the calm and silence of the night, maybe even offering a rare, soft conversation about things he never talks about with anyone else. It’s a peaceful intimacy between the two of you that he cherishes

Ekko

The most emotionally vulnerable one. He’d go to great lengths to show you just how much he cares about you

Ekko might not be the smoothest with words, but he’d give you the sweetest, most sincere compliments. He’d tell you that you’re the most incredible person he knows, and he wouldn’t just say it to make you smile—he means it from the bottom of his heart

Love language would definitely be acts of service, doing his best at helping you out whenever he’s around

You’d be his favourite muse, always drawing you in his spare time and never forgetting all of the tiny details and stories that your skin has to share

When the world goes quiet, Ekko would enjoy staying up late with you, talking about everything and anything. From big dreams to small, funny moments, you’d get lost in conversations, and he’d listen with genuine interest, always making you feel like you matter

Whether it’s fixing up something around the house or building a project together, Ekko would love to get his hands dirty with you. He’d enjoy the teamwork aspect, and it’d be a bonding experience where you both get to learn and laugh together as you create something meaningful

Even when Ekko is busy with his own projects, he’d make sure you always feel like the most important person in the room. Whether it’s sending a quick message just to check in or looking up from his work to give you a smile, he’d make sure you know that you’re never far from his thoughts

Ekko would be the type to share his vulnerabilities with you late at night when everything’s calm. He might not be the most openly nostalgic, but with you, he feels safe enough to talk about his deepest fears, his past, and his dreams for the future. In these moments, he’d be incredibly honest, leaning on you for comfort as you listen intently, creating a quiet but powerful bond between you both

If you were ever feeling down, Ekko’s touch would be gentle but reassuring. He’d hold you close, running his fingers through your hair or gently cupping your face as he looks into your eyes. He wouldn’t need to say much; his soft presence and the way he holds you would be enough to make you feel safe and loved, as if you were the only person who matters in that moment

[bunny-jpeg]

can i pls order crostata, english muffin, and mango sorbet with a side of margarita and a vodka shot w/ lando norris

bakery menu

thank you for submitting to the bakery. i hope that you enjoy the fic! i've been still trying to get into the groove of writing again. i've been recently working on original fiction so it's been a bit of a struggle to balance both kinds of writing. but i hope that i can provide more in the future! thank you! <3

crostata: “stupid slut, this is what you wanted huh? wanted me to fuck you like i hate you.” + english muffin: "aw, is someone crying?" + mango sorbet: "you are by far the dumbest thing i've ever fucked. how did they even let you graduate?" + a vodka shot: rough sex served by lando norris (formula one)!!

tags: smut/pwp, rough sex, mean!lando, dom/sub dynamics, established relationship (dating), after care, clit teasing, dirty talk/degrading language, doggy style, protected sex, mild spanking

you liked when it hurt. not that it was a bad thing. but you liked the feeling of when sex got a little rough. it was something that excited you to no end and often made you squirm at the thought of.

everyone sort of assumed that you and lando would be into simple, vanilla sex. lando adored you, it was like you hung the moon and all its stars! you were the center of his world in some respects.

but looks could be deceiving. for every gentle hand on your lower back there was a swift smack across your ass. for every caring hand on your shoulder there was that same hand wrapped around your throat. every "i love you" had it's equivalent, “stupid slut, this is what you wanted huh? wanted me to fuck you like i hate you.”

together in his apartment in monaco, the season was going to begin soon. it was hard not to squeeze every last moment together, especially when pre-season testing made it a reality that there would be some distance between you two for a while.

lando wasted no time making sure that you didn't forget who you belonged to. not that you could forget, the ache of his last fucking could still be felt between your thighs. he had you in his bed, with one hand teasing your clit and the other scrolling through his phone.

he told you he was checking emails, but he was in instagram for several minutes now. his nose practically in his phone as he played with your clit. he knew he was overstimulating you, you weren't keeping it a secret.

"lando."

"shut up." he said as he got more rough with his movements, "i'm trying to focus on something here. i swear if you cum, you won't get anything until i come back. but, you'd like that right?"

the dirty talk was unmatched, it made something fire in your brain as you squirmed next to him. you were naked, he was clothed. you were falling apart, he seemed uninterested. you were a mess, he was in total control. that was how the game was played.

"please, lando."

he loudly sighed, "you are by far the dumbest thing i've ever fucked. how did they even let you graduate? like honestly! did daddy pay for that degree." he rubbed faster, his quick fingers made your eyes roll back a little, "i'm doing everyone a favour by keeping your slutty little body busy. they'd pass you around like the slut you were."

you whined and arched your back a little. the feeling was intense and it made your pulse leap. it was erotic, you knew that for certain. lando knew exactly how to make you feel hot.

he put his phone down and finally gave you the attention you needed. he pulled his hand away, fingers slick with your wetness. he eyed his digits for a moment and said, "what a slut. getting off to this? shame." then licked his fingers, "on your stomach, slut. i don't wanna see that whorish face tonight." and you were eager to get on your stomach.

you whimpered when he pressed his hand onto the back of your neck, pushing your face further into the covers. how sweet, how cute.

"have to get a condom." he pulled away and got his clothes off. once everything was shed, he grabbed the gold and black wrapper from the drawer and put it on. he stroked his cock a little at how obedient you are, "gotta protect myself. you're such free use that i'm pretty sure if i got you pregnant you wouldn't even know it was mine." his words were like venom and it made you core clench.

he soon sank into you, his force was heavy and it made you toes curl at the feeling. you gasped into the covers then whimpered from the stretch. lando's cock was big and sometimes it took a little while for you to get accommodated. but yet, the pain made you wet.

"aw, is someone crying?" he asked.

"no." you squeaked.

he slapped your ass once before he planted both hands on your hips. his pace was brutal, there was little room for tenderness. and why did he need to be tender? you got off to this. you loved when he took what was his without little remorse.

it got you off being used like this, to give up a sense of autonomy and power to have your boyfriend fuck you rapidly. to feel him deep inside of you from the angel. it was erotic and it made you heart shudder. you felt a haze came over you, the pleasure jolted in your body as lando made the bed squeak from how intense his movements were.

"fuck, only thing you're good for, huh? keeping my cock wet. can't find another whore like you." he chuckled lightly as he pressed his chest against your back, "special, huh? that's what you think you are. at least i found use for you. keep you dumb and quiet with my cock in your throat. i know you drool when you see me in my fireproofs. i bet you finger that tight cunt of yourself to thoughts of me. i've ruined you, and it's an honour. to know that you may be dumb, and you may be a total slut. but at least there's only one cock in your empty little head." his breath hot in your ear as he continued to fuck you with such a feverish pace that you felt yourself losing track of most things.

nothing else mattered at that moment besides lando's cock inside of you. his balls hit against you and the angle meant that he was deep inside of you. he kept you pressed under him. you held onto the covers and felt the pleasure wash over you.

sex with lando was unlike anything else, you never had another partner like him and you never would. this was all you craved for, in every respect. his words were filthy and it made your pussy flutter around him. eager to keep him inside of you.

"lando."

"shut up." he purred.

he could feel the thump of his heart in his head. the rush from it all made him excited, he loved the feeling. he loved you, even with your need for such filthy language. he would be happy to provide it. because the sound of your pussy soaked around his cock was more than enough incentive to talk to you the way he did.

you held onto the covers tightly. you felt the pleasure surge through you. everything felt hot and heavy in your head. you felt the sweat on your body and how painfully slick your cunt was. only lando could make you yearn for it all so badly. for the language and the pain. how he could move yu and fucked you as so desired. it left you a panting mess in bed.

it all belonged to him.

and he knew that. he could feel the tension in your body and worked you harder to get you to climax. this is what heaven felt like, this was everything he so desired sexually. he heard your sweet noises and it only encouraged him. spurred him on as he fucked you. he panted heavily and gripped onto you tighter.

"fuck, baby." he said, "that's it. see. see what happens when you behave. when you take cock like a champ. it's only my cock you want. fill that head of yours with thoughts of me fucking you. i'll come back and you'll still be soaked for me. you're mine, right?"

you whimpered loudly, "yes, lando. fuck yes!" you sounded so desperate. it was no surprise to him that soon you arched your back and buried your face in the pillows as you came around his cock. orgasm hit you hard and it made you swear under your breath between heavy pants. you tensed up and it made lando shudder.

you relaxed soon after against the bed and lando held on tightly as he fucked you quicker to get to his own climax. the entire thing felt intense in his core. he swallowed back the pleasure in his mouth. he swore under his breath as he gave it a few more thrusts before he finished inside of you.

"fuck, that's it. that's my special little slut." he purred as he rocked against you through his climax. it felt good, so good.

you moaned in response and he slowed to a spot. he rubbed the spot where he smacked you earlier before he gave you ass cheek a firm slap once more.

he pulled out and threw the condom out. he got back into bed with you and threw the covers over top of you. he asked, "too hot? too cold? do you need anything?" his voice was so gentle. you just looked at him and nodded your head.

"i'm okay."

"not too much right?" he got under the covers with you too and rubbed your shoulder, "you have to tell me." that was also part of the game. feedback and communication, they went had in hand.

you reached for his face and pulled him in for a tender kiss. he kissed you back, eyes closed as he got his arm around your middle. he pulled you in close and you smiled against the kiss.

"anything you need? water? snack? anything." he said when he pulled away and looked into your eyes, "tell me, baby."

"right now." you said as you yawned, your heavy climax made you exhausted, "i just want to be held by you. but after... maybe we can have some of that frozen yogurt in the fridge?"

lando chuckled lightly, happy that you were okay. he kissed you on the forehead, "you drive a hard bargain, baby. but anything for you." and you knew that didn't just mean dirty talk and rough sex <3

[melodysoars]

all good! for some context, I'm in law school and working with two national watchdog groups that monitor clean water & food safety; what I mean to say is that none of my professors, supervising attorneys, or peers are freaking out over this ruling.

To be an enviro activist news source is to be professionally outraged about everything all the time. The public-facing sides of groups like the Sierra Club and MPU are obviously going to publish short, catastrophic-sounding bulletins that make people panic/donate. That's why you couldn't find a substantive MPU article — it doesn't exist. A tweet about "Sewage In Your Drinking Water!" is going to get people talking; it's just not what this case is really about. I always recommend thinking super critically about enviro echo chambers.

Now I've got to apologize for being unclear: when I said "article" in those personal tags, I meant "opinion". I'm going to put the rest under the cut, but I wanna give a short run-through of what City and County of San Francisco v. EPA, 604 U.S. _ (2025) actually means for the CWA in case people are super worried.

TL;DR: SCOTUS now requires the EPA to tell companies exactly what to do to fix water quality. This means more work for the EPA, not less, and that CWA permits are going to take longer and spark more lawsuits. If the EPA keeps doing its job, water quality will stay the same.

Obligatory disclaimer: I'm a law student, not a certified attorney. Apply salt as needed.

First, while any opinion SCOTUS puts out is noteworthy, City and County of San Francisco v. EPA (which I will now refer to as Frisco) is not a unique or targeted attack. I think it's surprising to many people that a lot of environmental legal work actually involves suing the EPA (or USDA or FDA or Army Corps of Engineers...) for fucking up. On average, the EPA fields 150+ lawsuits a year, so the idea that they'd be called out on their permitting wasn't exactly a blindside.

Frisco centers around the definition of the word "limitations". The majority, led by Justice Alito, argues that a limitation has to be more specific than a vague end goal. The dissent, led by Justice Barret, argues that limitations include vague end goals. There are other issues in the opinon, but it basically boils down to whether or not the EPA can legally bind companies to vague promises to "not contribute to" or "not create" water quality violations.

Crash course in the Clean Water Act: before 1972, there was an older water protection law called the Federal Water Pollution Control Act (WPCA) that was widely regarded as a failure. In 1972, Congress created the CWA and changed how the law handled pollution. Instead of trying to retroactively assign blame for already-committed pollution, the CWA now tries to prevent it in the first place (or tie it to a specific polluter from the get-go) with permits and use the fine money for clean-up. This is widely regarded as a good idea. Now fast forward to 2019. Frisco began because the EPA tossed in two new regulations (the "not contribute" and "not create" ones from above) on a San Francisco permit that were more in line with the WPCA old law than the CWA we currently have. The city said "that's not the law," and now the Supreme Court has also said "that's not the law". Justice Alito is very careful to stress — Frisco actually upholds the Clean Water Act. It just limits the EPA from going beyond it.

Key points:

The EPA can still, as it always has, set quantitative and narrative requirements on its permits. Permittees still have to watch their toxics and sewage discharge and can still be fined and sued for not trying hard enough. That's not changing.

However, permit limitations now have to be assigned "from without"; i.e. the permittees can't make their own decisions about how to fix problems. This actually gives the EPA more control, but also a lot more work. The NPDES permit process is going to take longer now and there will be more lawsuits.

The reason why businesses are celebrating is that they are no longer responsible for the end result of their pollution control attempts. If the EPA tells Example Corp. that they have to do XYZ and then they actually do XYZ, then Example Corp. can't be fined —even if the water is still polluted & we're pretty sure it's due to them.

In the short term, this is going to create a kerfuffle. The EPA has to redo its permitting process. There's no clear consensus on what's going to happen to the hundreds of thousands of permits already out there. In the long term, if EPA can work out a standard and detailed permitting script, not much will change at all! If somehow the EPA gets a lot more funding, this could be an amazing tool for environmental protection (or at least, eco attrition warfare). The general consensus among lawyers seems to be that as long as the EPA is reasonably staffed and funded (ha), not much will change.

Overall, Frisco is a fairly standard SCOTUS-is-out-of-touch case. It's not evil. It's not doomsday. It's not great news, but it's certainly not the biggest recent threat to the CWA or EPA (goodbye Chevron my old friend; Sackett my beloathed). To learn more about Frisco, I recommend these articles and overviews by Bloomberg Law, JD Supra, Oyez, and Morgan Lewis. On a final note, the EPA is not the only agency involved in water monitoring! All but 3 states have their own DEQ water monitoring boards that work mostly but not entirely in concert with the federal agency. So even if the EPA does get dismantled, not all would be lost.

However, let's work to keep the EPA around as long as possible! Right now (3/13/25), there's an attempt to remove the National Environmental Policy Act from federal law. PLEASE go to federalregister.gov or click this link and submit a public comment stating how important NEPA is and how much you support it. Comments can be as short as a few sentences and each one matters (legally, the gov't has to read and consider them before passing a rule). So far there are nearly 17k of us voicing support and with two weeks left, I really think we can hit 20k!

[cameronsbabydoll]

how do you think rafe would react if reader randomly bumped into one of her old friends and it’s a guy who was considerably older than her as well? even worse, reader insists she just had to hang out with them after seeing them because “it’s the polite thing to do”.

When you casually mention bumping into your old friend who’s much older than you, Rafe would initially hide his true feelings. He'd give you a tight smile, masking the small flicker of irritation behind his eyes.

“An older friend, huh?” he’d ask, his voice calm, but his posture stiffening slightly. He’d be sizing the situation up in his mind, trying to gauge if there’s anything to worry about. “How much older are we talking here?”

As you go on to say you “just had to hang out” with him because “it’s the polite thing to do,” Rafe would almost freeze for a moment, caught between his need to be rational and his protective instincts.

“The polite thing to do, huh?” He'd repeat the phrase with a slightly condescending chuckle, almost as if to challenge you. His brows would furrow slightly. “So, it’s polite for you to go hang out with some older guy, but you don’t think that’d make me a little uncomfortable?”

His tone would be calm, but there’s a hint of something darker beneath the surface. Rafe would be trying to figure out whether you're genuinely oblivious to how this looks or if you’re being a little too naive for his liking.

“You know, baby,” he’d add, his voice lowering a little, “I get it. We’re both older than you. But I’m actually someone you’ve chosen. This guy? I’m not so sure.”

He wouldn’t be outright angry at first, but it’d be clear he’s keeping his guard up. The idea that this older guy could now be in the picture, again, even if it’s “just polite,” would push him into overprotective mode.

Rafe would cross his arms, giving you a long look that would make you feel his irritation even if he isn’t saying much. “It’s not like I don’t know what that feels like, baby. I’m older, too, remember? But when I choose to hang out with someone, it’s because I actually want to. Not because I’m trying to make anyone feel good.”

If you try to brush it off, saying it was no big deal, Rafe would not let it go so easily. He might chuckle again, a little darker this time, before pulling you closer, his hands resting on your hips possessively.

“I don’t care how polite you think you’re being. I’m not thrilled about you spending time with some older guy, especially when it’s so casual for you.” He’d smirk, leaning in closer, his lips brushing your ear as he continues, “You might think it's polite, but it doesn’t sit right with me. I don’t trust the guy, and I definitely don’t like you letting him get too comfortable around you.”

Rafe would give you that pointed look, the one he knows will make you feel the weight of his words, even if he’s still trying to be somewhat reasonable.

“You should be more careful who you let in, sweetheart. People can have all kinds of intentions. You think you’re just being polite, but I see it differently.”

Even though he'd never show it outright, Rafe's mind would be racing—focusing on what this guy's intentions are, how he could be a potential threat, and how he'd need to keep an eye on this “old friend.” He’d try not to come across as too jealous or possessive, but he'd make it clear that no one else would be getting too close to you, no matter how "polite" it seemed.

In the end, his tone would soften, but only a little, as he’d lean in and pull you into a firm hug. “Just don’t let it happen again, okay?” He’d murmur in your ear. “I’m the one you should be focused on.”

Rafe would show his possessiveness in subtle ways after that—asking about the friend more often, reminding you of his presence, and keeping a closer eye on you, all while making sure you knew that he was the one that mattered.

[devilish-cherry]

ok ok hear me out on weirdo bf choso who silently and stealthily leaves strange offerings for the reader that are supposed to be gifts but unintentionally come off as extremely creepy...

the reader mentions missing lunch everyday between classes/work? a suspicious-looking homemade bento appears in her fridge, with little faces in the food that look more creepy than cute. the reader mentions she accidentally shrunk her clothes in the wash? a bag of new clothes in her size is left on her desk. the reader mentions she needs new kitchen knives? a full set suddenly appears in her kitchen, shiny and sharp and terrifying. no note, no words, no sign of who might've brought the gifts or why.

reader thinks she has a stalker but really it's just her bf not understanding the concept of communicating before gifting things to people. choso's like a cat that brings their owner a dead mouse to show affection. i can't stop thinking about this. do you see the vision

STOP. STOP RIGHT THERE. BECAUSE I SEE THE VISION. I SEE IT SO CLEARLY IN 4K HD ULTRA RESOLUTION. I AM STARING DIRECTLY INTO THE VISION WITH TEARS IN MY EYES.

this is SO choso-coded it’s insane. this is exactly the kind of behavior choso would exhibit because he has absolutely no idea how normal human interactions work, and honestly? good for him. he’s just out here expressing his love in the most cryptic, unsettling ways possible. he knows he’s supposed to provide, he knows he’s supposed to take care of you, but no one ever told him he had to explain himself while doing it. why would he do that. he’s literally giving you what you need??

the bento?? horrifying. imagine opening your fridge and just seeing a homemade meal staring back at you. the little rice ball faces are not cute. they are uncanny. they are haunting. and the worst part is, you have no idea who put it there. is it poisoned? is it cursed? you don’t know.

the clothes??? imagine you shrunk your favorite sweater in the wash, only to come home and find a bag of new clothes, in your exact size, sitting on your desk. no note. no explanation. no evidence of entry. you are losing your mind. there is no reasonable explanation. how did this person know your size? are they watching you?? are they in your walls??? meanwhile, choso is just happily existing thinking he’s done the most thoughtful thing in the world. you start sleeping with one eye open.

THE KNIVES. imagine coming home from work, already exhausted, only to flick on the lights and see an entire shiny, pristine, borderline combat-ready knife set on your counter. no receipt. no note. just gleaming steel staring back at you. you straight up think you’re about to be murdered. you start considering witness protection.

this man is so lucky he’s cute because he is out here actively accidentally convincing you that you have a deranged stalker when in reality, it’s just him being the most socially oblivious yet well-intentioned boyfriend of all time. you start thinking you have a stalker. you are TERRIFIED. you bring it up to choso, all shaken up, like "omg someone has been breaking into my home and leaving things for me i think they're dangerous” and choso just. blinks. tilts his head. furrows his brows like a confused cat and is like:

"…you do not like the gifts?"

and that’s the moment it clicks. everything. the bento. the clothes. the knives. it was him. the whole time. in his mind, this is all deeply romantic.

and now you have to explain to your very sweet but extremely socially inept boyfriend that you appreciate the thought, really, but leaving unsolicited gifts in complete silence like some kind of eldritch sugar daddy is deeply alarming behavior.

i am OBSESSED with this concept. i am in love with your brain. i will never stop thinking about this. you have permanently activated my choso brainrot and now it will never shut off. thank you for this blessing misty, you are doing the lord’s work for the choso nation. 🙏

[dark-moonlust]

Love in Full Bloom

Commission for anon on Patreon. Enjoy!

Pairing: fae male x female human reader

Summary: Spring brings new life to the botanical garden where you meet with Florian, your fae mate and Lord of Nature. Amidst growing flowers and dazzling fae magic, he makes you understand how much he loves you.

Warnings: sfw, spring vibes 🌸, fluffy cute feelings, emotional intimacy and steamy kisses, passion and tenderness, fae magic, smut implied briefly.

Spring had come.

The botanical garden was full of life and colors.

There was something mesmerizing about it: the trill of birdsong, the hum of bees and the scent of freshly awakened flowers.

You picked up your pace, weaving through the garden's paths and heading to the clearing where you were to meet your mate. The place around you was scattered with trees and flowers, leaves and petals swinging gently. It was one of the places Florian, your fae mate was responsible for.

Darn it... You were late. Nearly running, you darted through people, your fingers brushing across the pendant on your chest—a delicate silver leaf with a small bird beside it. It was Florian's present to you, a symbol of his protection, infused with his powers to keep you safe. You grinned, remembering the day he'd clasped it around your neck, saying: As long as you wear this, you will be safe. Always under my care.

Florian, your fae boyfriend waited for you by the north gate, in front of the secret entrance where the lines between the commonplace and magical blurred.

He was tall, towering over you with broad shoulders and a muscular body that made you hot all over. A sun-kissed face with sharp features, prominent cheekbones, a strong jawline, and pointed ears. His eyes were a deep forest green with gold flecks, and when he looked at you, it felt like he could reach right into your heart.

Long brown hair stained with gold and copper strands fell to his shoulders, and somehow, no matter what, tiny flowers and leaves found their way into it. And his wings, oh they were stunning. They were now tucked behind his back, but they were huge and clawed, with translucent membranes that shimmered in green, gold, and silver hues.

His lips softened into a smile when he saw you. He rushed to you, his steps fluid and graceful. Strong hands wrapped around your waist, enclosing you in his embrace. He smelt of musk and flowers, and you still couldn't believe he was yours.

Yes, Florian always made you feel that deep, wonderful flutter in your chest. He was the fae Lord ruling over nature, but he was also completely yours. A fae so strong, yet you were always struck by the contrast between his power and the gentleness of his touch.

"There you are, little wren," he murmured, his lips brushing against yours. Soft and wet. "I've been waiting for you."

You smiled against his mouth, loving the way he spoke your nickname. Florian affectionately called you his little Wren. He'd said you reminded him of the small, joyful birds that sing in the forest.

"I'm sorry. The bus arrived later than usual."

"I was beginning to think you'd gotten lost." He exhaled. "I still would have preferred to hold you in my arms and fly you here. It would have been quicker, safer, and I wouldn't have to spend any second apart from you."

"It's okay," you said softly. "Spring is here, and as Lord of nature, you have so much to do. Besides, flying is not so convenient if people see us."

"Alright then. Next time, I'll walk with you. I do not like leaving you alone."

You laughed and kissed him fondly. "Florian, it is the middle of the day, and I am wearing your protecting pendant. I am safe. Always."

He hummed, his thumb delicately stroking the delicate jewelry. "I know. But you are my little wren, and I would rather keep you close, where I can see you and protect you myself."

"How sweet and protective," you said as his hands stroked your spine. "But I am not made of glass. I can take care of myself."

Florian frowned. "That doesn't mean I'm not worried. It's in my nature to protect my mate."

"I know that," you grinned, cupping his face. "I'm so happy you're mine."

He smiled—a genuine, brilliant smile. "You always know what to say to ease my mind." He patted your ass playfully. "Come, let's walk. The garden is in full bloom and I want to show you something."

He grabbed your hand, his fingers intertwining with yours, as you followed him through the magic gate and deeper into the paths of the garden, away from prying eyes. At your feet, flowers sprang to life, their petals unfurling in a riot of color while the trees swung gently, their leaves whispering things only Florian could understand.

It seemed as if the earth itself was worshiping him and also accepting you, honoring your bond. It made you feel so happy and blessed.

As you walked, Florian unleashed his magic, tiny flecks of stardust floating through the air. The earth responded to his call. The flowers bloomed in sparkling blues, bright reds, and deep purples that appeared to glow from inside. They smelt delightfully sweet. Butterflies with wings like stained-glass flew about you while birds tittered from the treetops.

"Wow... Florian," you marveled, "it's so beautiful."

He grinned. "This is nothing yet. Look at that." Next, he took you along a meandering route dotted with cherry blossoms, their pink petals drifting lazily to the ground. With a flick of his wrist, his magic danced again, and the petals whirled around you, swirling in the air before settling on your head like a crown. You laughed, wiping one off your nose, while Florian gazed at you, his eyes glowing with tenderness.

"Are you happy, little wren?"

"Of course, I'm happy. So so happy! You're pretty amazing, you know that?" you said, your face beaming.

He cupped your face, his thumbs stroking your cheeks. "You're so beautiful. Your eyes, your smile... so much more beautiful than the first bloom of spring."

You flushed because surely he was teasing you. "Flatterer."

"I speak the truth. How can you be so perfect?"

You chuckled. "I'm far from perfect, but if you think so, I won't argue. Thank you. For sharing this with me. For taking me as your mate even if I'm only human —" "No," he cut you off. "Thank you for being mine. For accepting me, not just the fae, but… me." You smiled, your fingers framing his cheek. "How could I ever resist you, Florian?" He did not answer with words. Instead, he kissed you, his lips claiming yours, tenderly, possessively. It began softly, as it always did, but it quickly deepened, his hands sliding to your waist and pulling you closer. You melted into him, your fingers fisting the fabric of his shirt as you kissed him back, opening your mouth to him.

Growling, his tongue delved inside, mating with yours and you whimpered softly, the sound drowned out by his kiss. You tasted the slight sweetness of honey and wild berries, a flavor that was entirely Florian. One of his hands moved up your back, leaving a trail of heat, and the other cradled the back of your neck, his fingers cupping your nape.

When he finally drew back, you were both out of breath, your fingers buried in his silky hair. Every line of his body was hard against yours, his eyes half-lidded. You could feel the fire in him, the way his heart pounded in tandem with yours.

"Do you see now?" he muttered, his voice gruff and low. "How impossibly in love I am with you?"

"Florian…"

He silenced you with another kiss, this time deeper and more demanding. His hands moved across your body, tracing your waist, the dip of your spine and your smooth hips. When his lips left yours to trail down your jaw, you groaned, dropping your head to offer him full access. He went low, pausing just above your rapid heartbeat.

"Tell me you believe me," he said, his palm resting against your breast. "Accept how much you mean to me."

"I believe you," you muttered, trembling with emotion. "I believe you."

"Good," he replied, his voice a low growl. "Never doubt it. You are my everything. My little wren, my heart and soul. Without you, I would be lost. Lonely. Sad."

"You'll never be lonely," you said, tears gathering in your eyes. "Not as long as I'm here."

You didn't cry. Rather, you clasped his face in your hands and kissed him again, slowly and lovingly.

"And you're mine," you breathed against his lips. "My fae, my mate, my love and very breath."

Florian mumbled a husky 'I love you' as he nibbled your lip and poured all of his love and devotion into another kiss. It was a kiss unlike any other, tender and all-consuming, warming you from your head to your toes. Pulling back, he held you against him because you were still dizzy from the kiss and your mutual confession.

A swift peck on the tip of your nose and he raised a hand, his palm lighting up to reveal a gorgeous flower, its petals shifting from pink to gold as his magic touched it. He tucked it behind your ear, his fingertips brushing against your skin, lingering longer than usual. "There," he rasped, tilting his head to admire his work. "Perfect." "What kind of flower is it?" you asked, carefully touching the petals. "It's called everbloom. It is only open at sunrise and closed at sundown. But it will remain open for you. Forever." "Oh, you're spoiling me."

He grinned and whispered, "You deserve it. You deserve forever." As you paced the botanical garden, Florian took you to a secluded grove where a crystal-clear brook bubbled over smooth stones. He took you to a grassy area beneath a willow tree and kissed you again and again. Everything around you got covered by a surreal mist as he made love to you. He was wild and untamed, yet tender and steadfast, his love like a natural force. And as you clung to him, your bodies and souls merged as one, you marveled at how deep your love was.

THE END