#do i think they're all straight? no but like Officially they are
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lemotmo · 2 days ago
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I think you or Ali have talked before about how we couldn't make predictions about timelines for queer Eddie and Buddie until we had more information. After 8x06, what do you think the timeline is looking like? I am torn between thinking they're going to need more time for queer Eddie, and it might not happen til 8B, but ALSO, using the Chekov's gun of "I'm straight" also makes me feel like they have to address that soon while it's in the general audience's mind? What are your thoughts?
Good question Nonny. I fully admit that I'm just not sure anymore. All I know for sure is that they have officially started the storyline in episode 6.
I do think something Eddie and Buck related will happen in 8x08 though. An accident or something else and they might have to rely on each other to get through it or one of them needs to take care of the other. Something like that. We have gotten too many callbacks to Buck and Eddie's former NDEs.
Something is going to happen and I think that might start off a journey of becoming aware of their feelings for the other. Or maybe just one of them. It'll be some kind of cliffhanger and the story will further unfold in 8b.
That's how I see it,but there's no certainty.
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lovvecherrymotion · 19 days ago
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okay so as much as i would have loved a queer mv, i didn't actually expect that to happen. i think they are very good at making queer fans feel included but i just don't actually expect them to be more explicitly queer when it comes to songs or videos idk. i just wish the others had a bit more screentime because they all looked SO good
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throes-of-warm-tornadoes · 27 days ago
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the 2001 planet of the apes is so good to me. like, the 1968 version will always have a special place in my heart because the makeup magic was... dare i say... very magical, but i liked how the 2001 one leaned into a more biologically accurate angle. like, those are straight up apes. no wonder humans aren’t speaking as a survival tactic, those things could hurt you without even trying. again, the 1968 one was so good and impressive but the fact that taylor could overpower the actors that were playing gorillas was a little jarring lol. which makes sense, cos so much of his escape plan relied on him being strong enough to push people out of the way.
this isn't a complaint btw! they're just people in costumes---they are still very much giving ape, but there wasn't much they could do about that on a physical level. so, when the 2001 had these big hulking gorillas and more accurate looking chimpanzee faces on the screen, i appreciated that detail about the humans exploiting their fear of the water. it leveled the playing field without making the fight against the apes look like a losing battle
#i do really love that u can still tell it's makeup though#i feel like people say that as an insult bc it apparently “takes them out of the story” but like. cmon#cgi or not they're not real apes either way#i explained this so horribly as per usual :(#but im just saying that those mfs---especially chimps---are STRONG#like if we wanna get technical the gorillas at the beginning had to have been making a conscious effort not to use ALL their strength#when they were hunting the humans in the 1968 movie#otherwise they prob just would have died/been severely injured by just being manhandled into their cages#i think the only hint of ape strength we got is when cornelius straight up murdered that mf just by whacking him in the head w a lunch tray#im no movie expert (far from it... i cant be trusted to analyze anything really) but i did rlly like the 2001 version for a lot of reasons#the first one obviously being what this post is about: addressing the natural strength advantage apes have. which is why they don't use gun#bc why even give humans a sliver of a chance to get the upper hand#also they officially addressed why they hate monkeys! i mean u could kinda assume why but the confirmation was nice lol#i lowk didn't understand how the apes rose in that movie like even tho it was weird in the 1968 version#at least they dedicated several movies to the concept#woah these tags got long! thank god for this sideblog cos im not even embarrassed about it#ah shoot i forgot to add actual tags!#planet of the apes#planet of the apes 2001
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neverendingford · 11 months ago
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#so I have officially been to a club/bar now#tag talk#it was a country bar which was actually cool cause they played like. actual old country none of the post-9/11 shit#except everything else about it was ugh awful. music too loud drinks FUCKING EXPENSIVE holy shit stay home and drink instead pleaseeee#it was a work thing but none of my coworkers I'm friends with actually knew what they were doing so while I wasn't actual awkward they were#and the thing about social interaction is that if no one knows what they're doing it's not very fun#I grabbed someone and started a pool game because the table was open and both of us were absolute garbage at the game#but I was laughing about it and they were like... apologetic about being bad?? d#I did have the classic experience though where your friends disappear and you end up alone because you don't know where they went#all in all an interesting experience but not one I'm eager to repeat.#I did get invited to someone's Christmas Eve Party though which is cool and they gave me their number to make sure I have the info#so probably worth going just for that I think. got their phone number so we can communicate so that's like. successful social connection.#we're already friendly at work but easier to talk to someone when you're both not busy on the opposite side of the store with customers#anyway. who tf out going to clubs. awful environment.#I was like.. twenty percent of the way to being comfortable going out and dancing but hard to just swallow your hesitation#and a) alcohol as liquid courage is hmm not ideal and b) it was expensive anyway#oh well. it'll take more time to come out of my shell and I'd literally never been to a bar/club before in my life.#so I'll have some patience with myself and not be annoyed with how I could have done better or been more confident.#literally totally new environment. also... country music was nice but not a group of people I could really be comfortable around yaknow?#Lotta old white straight couples dancing the country two-step so I didn't really feel like I fit in.#anyway. interesting experience. neat to have. if I ever have a reason to go to a bar again I'll know more about what to expect#also... no one carded me. no one asked for ID? aren't they supposed to#oh wait. comment about the yodeling cause it was actual old country but they didn't do the voice register changes for it#I was like WAIT ARE THEY GONNA YODEL FOR REAL??? but then he didn't he just jumped intervals without shifting voice.#was a little disappointing but maybe a lot to expect from a random stage show at a bar.#wait wait I'm also proud of myself because the bartender asked open or closed and my mind scrambled for half a second to figure it out#but then I realized it meant open tab or closed tab like ordering more drinks and then paying at the end and so obviously closed#cause I ain't buying more than the one drink holy fuck it was so expensive also they mix them way stronger than I like#I like my drink weak ass and pathetic. alcohol is like spice I like a little to taste but not a lot. complimentary not overpowering#I drank it and then remembered I never ate lunch so I was like fuck and immediately went and ate something (work party so free food)
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sharkface · 1 month ago
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I do not think people are understanding that for people in the Carolinas there was no naive and stupid choice to stay in the hurricane instead of evacuating, the Carolinas are regularly hit by hurricanes after they've tanked in severity, no one communicated to them that it was going to get this bad. This isn't "rich people from florida" beach house antics, these are overwhelmingly rural and poor areas full of people with no flood infrastructure, no warning, and nowhere to go. It is impossible to truly toll the death this has caused, hundreds of people are missing, emergency services are having to leave corpses behind because there are so many more living people to deal with. And this is the people who had homes, who had the physical ability to try to escape! Nobody told them this would happen. This is what it looks like to have no emergency weather preparedness, no warning, in terrain that will trap you where you are. This is the mountains we're talking about- All water flows straight into the river valleys where most people live, and seeking higher ground risks you mudslides and rock slides, the ground will fall out from underneath you. This is going to keep happening, and nobody is going to care until it's their problem- And then they're gonna ask why no one is helping.
A lot of places to donate are evangelical groups that will keep more of your money than distribute aid (all while using the disaster to recruit), if you are looking into an org to donate to PLEASE AVOID THESE, THEY ARE NOT GOING TO BE HELPFUL IN A DISASTER SCENARIO, ANY OTHER CHARITY IS PREFERABLE, they're rarely helpful to their community under normal circumstances. Seek out individual people in need to send aid directly if you can, I'm positive a lot of gofundmes will be popping up in the near future as cities begin to regain power, otherwise the Red Cross is always taking donations and has historically provided the most relief for natural disaster survivors, you can also donate to United Way of Asheville and Buncombe County, an org run by officials in Asheville, which is one of the most immediately endangered areas of western NC and greatly in need of drinkable water.
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lilybecca1 · 28 days ago
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Wait, Bakudeku is literally considered canon in the Japanese fandom???!!! Like no joke, in Japan Bkdk being canon is actually a widely accepted thing?? Like, let me get this straight.
The manga was meant for Japanese audience mainly, so the romance would also be something that is suited for Japanese audience, not the direct and straight forward approach that non-japanese shows have when it comes to romance. And you guys remember the "Rest of our lives" scene? Well yeah, that's actually a marriage proposal in Japan. In Japan they don't say Will you marry me? Some of the most common proposal lines are literally:
“Let’s spend the rest of our lives together.”
“Having you by my side is what completes me.”
“I can't imagine my life without you in it.”
“I wish I could give you everything, but I hope that this ring is enough.”
"I will protect you forever."
Like bro what?? These are literally Bkdk coded. Like Izuku fr thought once that he can't imagine his world without Kacchan in it. And the “I wish I could give you everything, but I hope that this ring is enough.”?? Replace ring with hero suit and you get the freaking ending of the manga. And I will protect you forever is also so them like I just can't yjxnsjxjnxjdkkxkxkxkxkkdk
I know we were all waiting for Horikoshi to make Bkdk canon in some big way like at the end they're revealed to be together or some confession or some shit but we do forget sometimes that this is set in Japanese culture and in Japan things are very different. Much more subtle and way less straight forward and obvious. Most japanese husbands and wives don't even normally say I love you to each other, because they express love through different ways, like action. And that is very hard for our non-japanese brains to understand cause it's just so different over there and instead of being expressive, love in Japanese culture is more about gratitude expressed through actions and devotion. It's much more symbolic.
So then when we think back on all those Cherry Blossom official arts, well NOW it doesn't seem too far fetched to think it might mean something, does it? For us, all these little hints and symbolism are just that. Hints and symbolism. But for Japanese people? They know how to read it very well and it's common in Japan to express certain things through symbolism. Like "The moon is beautiful, isn't it?" Is a full on marriage proposal line. It doesn't seem like it to us, but to them yes. Also let's not forget we literally have a scene with Deku looking out at the moon and Bakugo too 😭
So, if we look at it in a Japanese sense, and that in japaese culture, love is expressed in a more symbolic way, and through actions and devotion, then it isn't so hard to believe anymore that Bakugo and Deku are actually fully implied canon in the manga. I mean talk about devotion..Bakugo literally spent 8 YEARS to help fund that suit for Izuku. He took "actions speak louder than words" fcking seriously.
Like would it be better if Horikoshi actually made them say they were in love or made then kiss or something? Yeah, but realistically speaking that probably wasn't gonna happen either way. And the fact that the Japanese fandom, who the manga is literally meant for, is fr congratulating Bakudeku for being canon!!!! Like y'all if the japanese fandom thinks that they're canon then it's safe to say that they are. Because in a sense, Japanese people can read and understand that "language" behind those hints better than us. And if they say it's canon, then I bet my ass it is.
TOO BAD I AIN'T FCKING JAPANESE
Like seriously why is it so hard being European. We wouldn't believe something was true until the cold hard evidence was literally laid right in front of our freaking eyes.
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queerstudiesnatural · 3 months ago
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kind of obsessed with the idea of dean and cas getting a house and sleeping in the same bed and building a normalcore life together, without ever officially getting together. cas comes back from the empty and dean hugs him, and after a few days he says they should get a house, so they do. they get a two bedroom and cas assumes it's so they each have their own room, but then dean picks one room as theirs, and says he thinks the other room will make a nice guest room for when sam and eileen/jack/claire come to visit. cas just goes with it. they always sleep in their pyjamas, and dean occasionally in his underwear when it's hot, so cas just figures they're friends who sleep in the same bed. dean has been so lonely his whole life, after all. dean sometimes puts on slow music and asks cas to dance, and cas is hesitant because he can't dance, but he figures dean needs casual touch and softness in his life, so he obliges. and then one day dean says "we should get married", and cas blue screens because he doesn't understand which need of dean's this is covering. his need for stability and family, perhaps, but he thought the house had been enough. so he just says "what?" and dean seems disappointed by that, and asks with a pout, "don't you want to?". cas is confused, but he answers honestly. "i do. i just don't understand why." dean seems confused too, but he presses on. "well, we've been together for almost a year now, and let's be honest we were basically together for twelve years before that, so i think it's time. plus i heard there are benefits, for like taxes and stuff. not that we pay that, but it could come in handy, i don't know." he searches cas' eyes, and cas' brain is going hold on a minute man. hold on a minute. dean asks again, "don't you want to?", and cas has to ask. "dean. when you say we've been together, what do you mean?" and dean is like, "i mean, like, dating? like a couple? right?" and when cas keeps looking at him with goldfish eyes he panics and goes, "oh god. haven't we? cas. we're together, right? i love you, you love me, all that? you haven't changed your mind on that, have you??" and cas about loses it like "what do you mean you love me??? when have you ever mentioned that?? dean, i thought we were just friends who lived together, i thought-" and now it's dean's turn to go "now hold on a minute man... you- what?? cas, we sleep in the same bed! we have breakfast together every morning! we've got a fucking garden!!" and cas just looks at dean stupidly and says, "but. we've never kissed? you sleep in your underwear! you've never said-" and he cuts himself off before he loses his damn mind because what??? so dean goes "oh. but you've been sleeping in pyjamas. and you've never tried to kiss me, or touch me. i tried it, with the dancing, but it was clear you were only doing it because i asked, so i didn't press it..." and cas does the goldfish bit a few more times before metaphorically shaking his head straight and saying "so, to clarify. we're a couple. and you think we should get married. and you want to kiss me?". dean laughs incredulously and says "yeah, pretty much. you okay with that?" and cas says yes. so dean kisses him. and wowza. cas would love to keep doing that forever. and well, apparently he can, because they're getting married.
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lazyjellyfishcreation · 3 months ago
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batman AU where everything is the same, exept that the Al Ghuls are the official royal family of the soverain city state of Nanda Parbat.
Like, its a very small country, but a powerful one and absolutely fuckall is known about their royal family, or the nation itself bc it's impossible to send spies inside without never hearing from them again. Nobody, exept for immidiate family even realizes that Damian is an actual crown prince of an actual country.
Like, just, him, on twitter. and then someone makes a joke about him and the way he is so overly formal in public. And Damian is like, 'yeah, I'm representing my whole country here, I'm the crown prince of my nation', and the person on twitter is like...
'Wat?'
And then Dick comes in the comments like. 'Look up the royal liniage of Nanda Parbat before you embarras yourself, I am begging you.' que a small twitter freakout bc holy shit, the youngest Wayne kid is actual fucking royalty, also, apparently Brucie Wayne fucked a princess, what's up with that?
the consequences this would have. Imagine this. They're at a gala, and IDK Black Mask shows up to rob/kidnap/kill them. The hired security never stood a chance. Bruce is there and is already making plans to slip out, and appear as batman.
interestingly enough, Damian is not making similar plans.
Damian just waits.
No more then two seconds later, at least 12 shadows crash trough the roof and absolutely massacre everyone there. No mercy, just murder, before making a protective ring around Damian, who is still completely cool and composed.
The cops try and make a stink about the 2 dozen dead henchmen and the dead Black Mask, but Crown Prince Damian just calmly walks over and tells commissioner Gordon that these were his body guards, and are therefore allowed to do these things if they judge it to be in favor of the crown prince's safety.
Nobody can really argue with that.
Two days later, at school, there are some upperclassmen who are being bitches, and are like. 'Where are your bodyguards now?'
'Just because you can't see them, doesn't mean they're not here.'
And a red dot appears on the boys forehead.
I just think it would be really funny if Damian Al Ghul was a genuine prince, in an official, international way. PS.
Even better if the Al Ghul's adopt Jason along the way, and Jason just, straight up also becomes a prince. He's not blood related tho, so he's still in line behind Damian, even though he is the oldest.
That would be insanity. After the Black mask fiasco, Jason just orders the shadows around like. 'okay, after we're done here, escort the crown prince to the secure location.' or whatever.
Someone films it. It goes viral.
People are like; 'what the fuck, why can you order them around like that.'
And Jason is like; 'I am the second prince, therefore, by tradition, the General. The Nanda Parbat fighting forces are under my command.'
and all of twitter is like; ????????
Do you see my vision here???
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tainbocuailnge · 4 months ago
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this is a final fantasy fourteen dawntrail post. it speaks incredibly for the desperation of the people of alexandria in its decline that they both couldn't bear to remember the dead and couldn't bear the thought of the dead no longer being remembered, and thus created this contradictory system where the dead are only remembered by something other than those to whom that memory is meaningful. so crushed by collective trauma and grief that they directed every effort to eradicating awareness of mortality altogether and it's resulted in a paradise where everyone is incredibly blasé about dying because the dead live forever in the cloud until they run out of spare souls and are completely paralyzed with fear of their own mortality.
but even more than desperation it speaks of a naive sincerity that the scientists and officials behind the project just actually genuinely built and maintained this giant memory database to preserve the deceased at increasingly large cost, rather than just lie that they totally did that to a populace who won't remember those deceased anyway. they're not harvesting souls to power the war effort while using a recreation of the beloved princess as puppet figurehead, they completely sincerely recreate the dead from their memories and simulate them living happily ever after, started by a sincere desire to not lose their beloved princess. living memory is an eternal theme park that actively goes out of its way to facilitate letting people who remember each other fondly meet again. it's the manifestation of a childish wish for a world where there are no partings, only reunions. it's a theme park rather than an actual city with a dmv and shit like amaurot was precisely Because it's a childish dream. it's fundamentally an artificial experience, but one which sole motive is to bring joy and relief from everyday sadness.
and sphene is the first and most prominent victim of that naive sincerity. she's the mascot of this theme park, and because she's the mascot in charge of providing this artificial but kind experience she can't ever break character. the people of alexandria couldn't bear the thought of her being forgotten, so they created a memory of her that would last forever, but they also couldn't bear to actually remember sphene, so she's a mascot instead of a person. she loves her people, and they love her, but none of them can possibly understand the weight that love puts on her shoulders. the sphene we meet is fundamentally trapped by other people's deeply limited understanding of her.
it's so so so important to her character that she's a small dainty feminine woman that exists to take care of everyone emotionally and be loved by them for being so nice and sweet and loving, and when she tries to arrange some kind of secure future she ends up with an abusive husband who ignores her wants and needs for his own ambitions, and she is fundamentally unable to act outside this highly gendered framework. sphene reads like the commonplace tragedy of the straight woman to me to the point where making her in lesbians with wuk lamat is like. I can certainly understand wanting to grant sphene the sense of liberation and comfort that many lesbians themselves feel at the realisation that they don't have to marry men, so far be it from me to say anyone is wrong to do so. but it's kinda ignoring part of what her deal is for the sake of that comfort I think.
not that lesbians have never ended up in abusive marriages with men but sphene very explicitly does not have other options, part of the tragedy is that you fundamentally cannot actually grant her that liberation and comfort. cahciua explicitly says there's no way to know what the real living sphene would have done because this sphene is a recreated memory of the beloved princess whose job is to sustain living memory. their darling sphene who will always listen to all their troubles and is always nice to them and will always take care of them. she's literally trapped by the role society assigned her, and that role is essentially to be their tradwife mother. the living sphene may have been into women, but the people who recorded her to create the sphene we meet never even considered the option.
do you guys know that tweet thread where OP describes going to a funeral for a woman they didn't know who'd died young of a heart attack, and the husband spent most of the eulogy talking about himself instead of his recently deceased wife, and by the end of the ceremony OP had learned nothing at all about what this woman was like beyond being a wife and mother? everyone fondly remembers the princess and queen of alexandria, but nobody remembers sphene. and just like all OP could still do for this woman was go to her casket and acknowledge that she too had been a full person in her own right before the stress of swallowing everything about herself killed her, all wuk lamat can really still do for sphene is think of her as the full person she must have been.
we're not told anything about what sphene was like as a leader, what her policies were, how she actually did her work, her vision for the future of her country before she died and was reconstructed. they only tell us everyone loved her so dearly because she was so kind to them. we're shown her dying moments and it's her using her airship to shield a civilian, so we can assume her love for her people was indeed true. but none of sphene's history that we're shown and nothing of how otis (who knew the living sphene) talks about her tells us anything about what she was like outside her role as beloved princess. her memories from after her "revival" are dissonant and corrupted and possibly not even real, and her policy of preserving living memory no matter what is a wish implanted in her by the people who reconstructed her. we don't even get to see what she looked like when alive. the only sphene the people know is the theme park mascot of living memory.
cahciua was exactly as erenville knew her and was true enough to herself to be able to turn against the system, so we're not given reason to believe any of the endless were tampered with. but sphene was already dead by the time they even tried to figure out how to preserve her memory, her actual soul and memories definitely long gone by the time the technology worked. we're explicitly told that nobody in everkeep really cared who or what sphene was as long as she adequately fulfilled this role of loving them all so much. she can't even tell you her favourite food, none of the people who labored so intensely and sincerely to bring her back bothered to write down even her most basic personal preferences when they reconstructed her. she has to deflect the question with "when I think of the people who make the food I can't pick just one" because the only preference she's allowed is loving all her people equally. she's completely thrown off that wuk lamat would even ask.
and it's precisely because she is remembered only as this kind loving woman who gave everything for her people that she is weak and powerless to actually do whatever it takes to keep them safe. she does not have the freedom to assert herself, let alone to be cruel or violent or take extreme actions. society does not give her that freedom, because she is a small dainty woman and (therefore) the only role allowed to her is to be their tradwife mother. so while her desire to protect her people is as real and true as it can be part of her plan to lobotomise herself in order to become someone capable of violence and cruelty also reads to me as that specific female frustration of wanting to destroy the sweet babygirl image of yourself by doing something extreme. like britney spears shaving her head. but in sphene's case destroying the babygirl image amounts to destroying herself completely, because the babygirl image of her is all that comprises her. and so when all is said and done the only fragment of sphene that is restored and lingers just a bit longer after that image is destroyed is the sphene that wuk lamat sincerely wanted to get to know.
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steddieas-shegoes · 9 months ago
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Country singer Steve Harrington, who has always leaned more into the pop country side of things (think Wanted by Hunter Hayes), but wants his third album to be more true to old school country roots.
His label agrees but only if he works with Eddie Munson, a rock star who had to leave the spotlight when he got kicked out of his band for, well, rockstar behavior gone too far.
Steve isn't amused, especially because he doesn't care for metal music or rock star shenanigans. He was "raised better" and doesn't think Eddie could sit down and write songs with actual emotion and feeling.
Cue long songwriting sessions where Eddie is trying his hardest to be on his best behavior because he knows this is his last shot at being taken seriously, and Steve being surprised every time Eddie proves that he's talented as a songwriter and musician, well outside the scope of just metal and rock.
They write a song that they're both so proud of, Steve asks if he'll record it with him just for fun. The released version would just be Steve.
Eddie agrees.
It's an incredible duet, something country music has needed forever, but Eddie doesn't want that version out there.
The label genuinely accidentally releases their version instead of the Steve only version. As soon as they realize, they remove it from official places, but it's too late.
Fans have already heard it and have gone crazy over it, begging them to let the radio play this version, begging for this version to be available for streaming. The Steve version is great, but it doesn't have the emotion that's laced in the tone of them singing together.
Eddie finally gives in when he sees how happy Steve is about the reaction to it.
But the label decides they want them to tour together, have Eddie work as his opening act, perform his acoustic songs that haven't been officially released anywhere. Eddie can't do it.
He can't go back into that lifestyle. He couldn't do it to his band, who made him promise that he'd come back to them when he got his shit straight. He can't do it to his fans, who stuck by him through some rough shit, but probably wouldn't support a fucking country music career. He definitely can't do it to Steve, who deserves to have someone with him who can be trusted not to go off the deep end.
So he runs. He hides. His uncle welcomes him home, congratulates him on finally embracing his country roots.
It doesn't take long for Steve to find him.
Because he'd been more honest with Steve than he'd ever been with anyone. He told him about his childhood, his Uncle Wayne, his struggle to make it. He told him about his worse struggle when he did make it, how he got in with the wrong people, the wrong things. Prioritized the lifestyle more than his own life.
Of course Steve knew where he'd run to.
Of course Steve came to remind him what his life could be if he allowed himself to find new priorities.
Steve's lips were pretty persuasive, but not nearly as persuasive as his promises to remind him what he could have if he kept his life his priority.
"But what if I let you down?"
"You won't."
"But-"
"No. You won't. You're gonna do amazing things for yourself. And I'm gonna be there to see it happen. That's all."
And he was.
They co-wrote Steve's entire album while Eddie worked on recording his own original songs. He liked that it was an old school rock and roll feel, some blues, some country, some hints of metal sneaking in on a couple songs.
He called his band to come help him with a song, hesitant to even ask, but they came. Of course they came.
He called his Uncle Wayne to play banjo on a song, worried that he wouldn't like the heavier electric guitar notes over it. Of course he loved being involved.
When their tour started, he let himself actually feel nervous.
But instead of running, he looked at the man who supported him through it, even when his own career was on the line.
Of course Steve was there.
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theminecraftbee · 5 months ago
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Doc's about four beers in by now. It's just enough to loosen his lips, especially with Etho eating most of the pretzels so Doc can't eat them. Compared to almost any other hermit under these circumstances, Doc seems barely tipsy at most, but, well, it's not like Beef needs him drunk to vent his latest frustrations at the world, he just needs him tipsy enough not to notice he's talking.
"--and I just don't understand why people are so surprised, man. You--you all have teased me too much to be surprised!" Doc is saying. "Ren laughed at me. Laughed!"
He also, for the record, seems to need to complain about... apparently his husband? Which is new. Beef had been surprised. He's not going to say so, yet, because this is Doc's very belated NHO bachelor party--can they call it that when it's more "sitting around a TV drinking, eating snacks, and not doing anything because they're all too old to be partying", and when Doc is very clearly not a bachelor?--and that would be rude.
"That dog," Bdubs says loyally. "I can kill him for you. I'm the judge so I wouldn't get arrested and I'd make sure you get all his money as a widow."
"No, you can't kill him, man, I still need him for tax benefits!"
"What taxes?" Etho asks, sounding vaguely panicked.
Everyone stops to consider this.
"Beneficial ones," Doc finally says.
"I don't think that's what--I think you're misunderstanding your English again," Beef says.
"No, I'm always right," Doc says.
They sit in companionable silence for a few moments. Someone shouts on TV. The show is in Swedish. Beef has no idea what's happening. He's honestly just kind of waiting for someone else to notice.
"It's just. I don't get it, man! Why are you all acting so surprised I called Ren my husband? You! You all know me!" Doc says, somewhere between accusing and despairing, and hm, maybe these beers were higher alcohol content than normal, if he's already on despairing? "Ren and I have been--after season eight, making it official, it is only a natural thing, yes? But we had--he's asked to have my puppies. You've heard him say our babies would be beautiful."
"That dog," Bdubs says loyally again, this time in a much more suggestive tone.
"More than once," mutters Etho.
"It's not--I mean, we all knew you and Ren were... how do I put this?" Beef says. "It's not surprising that you two are. Er. Help me out here."
"Boning," Etho says.
"EXCUSE YOU?" Bdubs says, scandalized.
"Yeah. Boning," Beef says. "Doing the horizontal tango. Probably some vertical ones too. I mean, you're definitely into some things--"
"Fighting dragons," Etho dryly adds.
"THAT WAS STILL GROUNDS FOR DIVORCE," Bdubs shouts, apparently over being scandalized and moving straight to offense.
"Two seasons later? Man, you just wanted to wring as much alimony out of me as possible," Doc says immediately.
"And? I'm a judge now, I know these things."
"My point," Beef says, before they can start arguing again, or before Etho can point out that they hadn't ever really been married to get divorced in the first place. "My point. We, uh, all knew you two had a thing. It's just, uh, marriage is... different! It's different, and--"
"You didn't INVITE ME TO THE WEDDING!" Etho says, finally unable to hold it in. "Whyyyyyyyyy? Doc, I thought we were friends! I thought we were friends, Doc! I wanted to go to the wedding!"
"It, it was a little thing," Doc says. "A common law marriage as much as--"
"Hey, wait, why didn't I officiate it, huh?" Bdubs says.
"That's not fair, you can't be mad at me for not inviting you to the wedding, the moon had just exploded!" Doc says.
"It had?" Etho says.
"Yeah, well, I exploded too and I still would have shown up," Bdubs says.
"I don't remember an explosion?" Beef says.
"Wait, the moon did something?" Etho says.
"Focus," Beef says. "Look. Doc. Also, love you man, but I always figured that if anyone was going to propose, it was going to be Ren."
Doc scoffs. "Clearly you don't know my husband, then."
Everyone waits for him to elaborate. Ren, after all, is the one known for dramatic emotional appeals. While Doc is equally dramatic--that's why Beef is throwing a bachelor party for the great fit as opposed to off showing him that Big Salmon can still show someone how to sleep with fishes--he's not exactly great at emotions. Surely, he will elaborate on why Ren would never be the one to propose between the two of them.
He doesn't.
"Anyway, I think it's been obvious for, for years, and you all are morons, and--why is the TV in Swedish?"
"THANK YOU!" Bdubs says. "I thought it would be rude to point out."
"Oh, I like it, though," Etho says as Doc changes the channel to a home improvement show. Yeah, sure. Fits the vibes of this bachelor party as much as anything else. Beef grabs another beer. He pauses.
"Wait, you said a common law marriage. That means you haven't actually had a wedding yet, right?"
"Not really," Doc says.
Beef considers being reasonable, and then he lets it go.
"Dibs on planning it," he says.
"WHAT?" Bdubs says, rounding on Beef.
"I--hey, I didn't agree to this!" Doc says, as Beef begins negotiations with Bdubs. Etho laughs, louder than he normally does, and throws an arm around Doc.
"Let it happen, man. Let it happen."
It's a good party, and a good night.
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woso-dreamzzz · 4 months ago
Text
Ma'am IV
Aitana Bonmatí x Royal!Reader
Summary: There's a lot of security
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"Is it just me or was it so difficult to find a parking spot today?" Marta asked as she and Caro came into the locker room," There's a bunch of black SUVs everywhere plus some flashy red sports car."
"There's a bunch of guys in suits checking out the place," Irene said, hanging up her jacket and changing into the training shirt," I saw them earlier."
"Maybe they're like undercover police officers?" Keira offered up," Maybe they busted some drug ring?"
"At our club?" Patri dismissed, one brow lifted in judgement," We're not the mob, Keira."
"I don't know," Pina teased," It would be one way to sort out our money situation."
"It's not police and we're not the mob," Alexia said in greeting, straight from a meeting. She returned to her cubby, switching out her shirt for her training jersey and scraping her hair back into a ponytail.
"Do you know something about this?"
"Yes. I do."
Silence for a moment.
"Do you want to share it?"
Alexia shrugged, head jerking across the room. "Why don't you ask Aitana?"
In sync, everyone turned to look at Aitana, who shrunk a little under the weight of all the stares.
"Aitana?" Keira asked," What's going on?"
"Well...I...I may have gotten married?"
"To the princess?!"
"Yes..."
"You got married? To the princess?"
"Keira, I just said that."
Keira slumped into her cubby, mouth hanging open. "Sorry, I just can't believe it. I mean...Wait, does this mean you're a princess now too?"
That was what set everyone else off, all the way from the changing onto the pitch.
The suited men were practically everywhere, stern looking, muscular men with earpieces in and eyes that pierced the soul.
"Are they going to be here the entire time?" Keira asked, head swivelling to count all of them.
"Not everyone," Aitana replied," Apparently they'll all be here for the first week, setting up perimeters and checking security and then it should go down."
"Should being the key word," You voice behind everyone caused a few people to shriek in shock, another two people jumping out of their skin.
For someone that travelled with so much security, you tended to appear out of nowhere.
"But these guys can be a little overkill sometimes. You should have seen them checking out our new place. They kept us in the car for nearly three hours. I nearly got heatstroke."
"We wouldn't have let that happen, Ma'am," The tallest, most muscular looking of the assembled security said.
You rolled your eyes. "Yeah, yeah, sure."
Aitana let out a huff of amusement. "I thought you were in meetings today."
"They ended. I wanted to see you."
"You saw me a few hours ago."
You pouted. "What? I can't miss my wife now?"
"You're very clingy," Aitana said even as she moved into your arms, pulling your arms over her shoulders and resting her head on your chest.
"Yes, I know. It's my most appealing attribute."
"She's the clingy one?" Keira muttered as Aitana adjusted your arms so they drew her closer.
"They're just as bad as each other," Pina said back," How long until this marriage thing blows up? I thought royal weddings were meant to be massive."
"It was an elopement," You said, mouth curving into a grin when Pina and Keira realised you could hear their mutterings," But I'm sure there'll be an official announcement. I think my father is thinking 'small and intimate' for it. Something like 'done with close friends and family'." You shrugged. "You know, something official sounding rather than..."
"Rather than random beach in Greece."
"Greece?" Pina asked," Sounds romantic."
"So romantic," You told her earnestly," Especially when Aitana did this thing with her-"
Your wife's hand clamped over your mouth and you fell silent.
"Random beach in Greece?" Keira said, looking straight at Aitana with a raised brow.
Aitana's face turned red. "It was very romantic."
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noneorother · 1 year ago
Text
I went dumpster diving into the posters for Good Omens Season 2 and found a few pearls.
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I found it odd that this season had SO MANY official posters. Hours and hours of work and real dollars from Amazon went into the production of these things. This one won a freakin Clio award. I know Neil confirmed he didn't have a lot of control of what went into these 21 (Or 22 depending on whether or not you count the umbrella piece that was made before season 2 shooting began. Personally I don't!) pieces, but I will leave no stone unturned, so here we go. I combed through every single season 2 poster I could find so you don't have to. Here's everything I've found so far:
1. The allegiances poster
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After having watched season 2, knowing what we know now, this poster seems very much to me like a Game of Thrones style family at war image. We have a perfect mirror down the center, with Aziraphale/Angels/Nina&Maggie on Aziraphale's traditional left side, and Crowley with Beelzebub & Jim as reflections of Maggie/Nina, and Shax and Michael(?) as reflections of the three angels on the other side of the mirror. It seems unbalanced, unless you count the floating white head (conveniently watching in the background) as The Metatron...
Which means Michael is... not on the same side as Uriel and Saraqael? She's also grouped in with the Metatron and Shax, on the side of the demons. How very odd. Gabriel & Nina also have a mirror in that they've both turned their backs to the crowd. Gabriel is willing to go live with Beelzebub in hell, and shut down Michael's plan and the Metatron's scheming for a second Armageddon, so that literal turn towards Beez and away from everyone else makes sense to me. The Nina one however? Not so much from what we've seen. Why is she turning her back on the angels & demons? 2. The individual posters
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Interestingly, the individual posters all line up pretty much exactly with the all the allegiances this season. You just have to look at the way the characters are slanted vs. how the backgrounds behind them are slanted. All 3 bookshop posters and all 3 street posters are slanting left, with their characters also slanting left. They are who they say they are, and they're on the same side.
Michael and Uriel have right slanting backgrounds, so odds are heaven is supposed to slant right. Uriel is following the rules and slanting right, but of all the characters on the posters, Michael is the only one really betraying the background slant, and is slanting left against her background. Something's up with Micahel. They're not on the same side as they claim to be. Saraqael is more mysterious, as the only one sitting straight, and the only angel to have a left slanting background. Shax seems to be slanting left with a left slanting background, which puts her in the same pose as Uriel, but mirrored. While Beelzebub is weirdly slanting right with a right slanting background, making them a bit of a traitor, like Michael. Shax, Saraqael and Michael have some explaining to do. Lastly, and I think mostly obviously, there's clearly a missing poster in the set. Why doesn't hell have a third green poster? Is it supposed to be the Metatron, and they didn't want to spoil the surprise? Furfur maybe? Why wouldn't poor old Furfur get a poster when he has more screen time than Uriel? I don't think this is very important other than it's funny : everyone single person is holding something in their right hand, except for Shax and Crowley, who are holding things in their left hands, and Muriel, who's holding fucking NOTHING. Poor baby Muriel lolsob. One thing I do think might be important is that there are 21 posters in total + 1 missing one. So maybe 22 posters for season 2? How appropriate. 3. The triple phone box
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In both the Nina street poster and the group street poster, there's are a set of 3 red phone boxes down the street. We never see phone boxes in series 2. Seriously, not once. Every other detail in these ones is from Whickeber street footage: gumball machine, post box, newspapers, coffee sign, puddle, walking extras... The only thing out of place is those blasted phone boxes. As far as I can tell it's literally the only thing in all 21 posters that never appears in the show in some form, and this background plate is used for all the street posters, so the phone boxes are in quite a few of them.
4. Crowley is showing his good side, Aziraphale is always facing away from Crowley.
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Crowley is always shown with his head tilted to his right this season, body tilted towards Aziraphale and always with long sideburns. Even in the illustrated poster his default is head to the right, sideburns long.
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EXCEPT for this poster. This is the only time he's looking away from Aziraphale, and his snake tattoo is visible. And his sideburns are short. Either nobody noticed this or they refused to fix it. There's also the matter of Aziraphale facing his body away from Crowley in every single image except the allegiances poster, where they face each other. So cute.
5. The sneaky details posters
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This one has: 1. Pride & Prejudice 2. Treasure Island 3. A tale of two cities 4. The Crow Road 5. Catch-22 9.
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AND whatever the hell this photoshop artifact/invisible thing coming out of the scroll on Aziraphale's desk. I checked every version I could find of this poster and it's always there. It looks like someone tried to edit out something that was there and sort of got it mostly right. Which is completely ludicrous given the amazing amount of flawless photoshopping and collaging going on in this image. These are the magicians linking rings from the 1941 magic shop. Mystery solved!
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This one has the yellow book on the bookstand, the record, and : 1. Only one clock hand on the grandfather clock, facing 6. 2. A feather duster on the floor (but weirdly it's grey not yellow). 3. The dark horse statue with Crowley's old sunglasses on it. 4. Aziraphale's bowtie ON THE FLOOR. What. Why. I can only conclude that in this poster either A) Aziraphale and Crowley have left these things behind (meaning no more bowtie for Aziraphale in season 3) B) They are currently not wearing these items somewhere else in the bookshop....
_____________________________________ I ran out of images. So the dome poster will have to be it's own post!
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mrs-monaghan · 1 month ago
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Tbh I'm a jikooker, but I find it incredibly difficult to fit a healthy long-term relationship into the same timeline as all of jimin's solo work. It's not the pronouns or taking one lyric very literally, its the entire thing, plus comments from him and his producers. To me, you'd have to do some serious olympic level mental gymnastics to make that make sense. I don't doubt that jikook have a special bond, I've definitely seen things between them that definitely look like sexual attraction to me and things that surpass friendship boundaries, but I can't in good faith say that they're together in some official long-term way if I actually listen to jimin and his work.
I've seen some jikookers think they broke up for a while, but I have to question if those people have ever been through a breakup because the little bit of distance/separation/awkwardness we did see from them during chapter 2 is nothing compared to the type of tension that would be there if a relationship that intimate and intertwined had separated, especially considering the dark feelings jimin was feeling. He wouldn't have been cutely commenting on jungkook's lives and jungkook wouldn't have been asking to hang-out or getting excited to see jimin in his comments.
Idk, I'm sure someone could twist everything a certain way and only take certain things at face-value and then make everything else abstract, etc. to make the case that they are together, but I don't really see it. You look at face-off, alone, and just his general dark feelings during Face, then look at the creation of Muse and how him and his producers said he couldn't relate to the love-dovey beginning songs, which is how they ended up making Who (despite the fact that jikookers try to distance him from the song since he doesn't have writing credits even though he sat in the recording room telling them what he wanted and saying it felt like reading his diary). I think jimin could have very well gone through a pretty awful breakup along with the inner turmoil he was going through post-covid, but I don't think it was with jungkook if he did. I still enjoy jikook's bond either way at the end of the day, but yeah I don't really get how anyone can take an honest look at jimin's work and his words and think he was in a long-term healthy love-of-his-life relationship during that time or into chapter 2.
Not trying to change your opinion or anything, honestly I don't really see it discussed much in jikooker spaces (besides bad-faith stuff like tkkers stirring up shit over pronouns in lyrics which is just dumb) and when it is, some jikookers are pretty pick-and-choose about what they deem to be true to jimin's feelings and what isn't. Which I get being nuanced, but sometimes it does feel like a "well this fits my beliefs so clearly this is true to jimin and this doesn't so it means nothing because he didn't write it" or whatever. I honestly get annoyed with the bad-faith arguers because it prevents being able to have actual discussions about some of this stuff in our little jikooker corner of tumblr. Like "he said her, he's clearly straight! he danced with a girl, straight!" stfu.
I don't have much to say to you anon. Not really. Not anything that hasn't been said anyway. Which you've seen and decided its jkkrs doing mental gymnastics. "I'm a Jikooker but..." its never a great way to start a sentence. It just gives major insecure jkkr vibes which i just 😬😬😬😬😬😬😬 you either believe in them or you don't. There is no if, and or buts.
I will leave you with this; over the years, antis and (insecure) jkkrs alike have always found a way to conclude Jkk aren't as close anymore or they broke up or some other bullshit. But what happens everytime Jikook resurface and we see them together again?
NOTHING HAS CHANGED!!!
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Nothing ever changes with these 2! They come back closer, more in sync, happier, more in love and their relationship more established than ever. This happens every👏🏽damn👏🏽time👏🏽 Everytime!
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Then the insecure jkkrs will be like "jkk is real" again.
And then we will go without content for a while and once again we are back here with the jkk aren't as close argument. Once again. It is an exhausting cycle that I refuse to be a part of.
You can try and nit pick various reasons as to why Jikook aren't in an established rlship, but I will chose to focus on reasons why they are definitely 130000000% in a relationship. Like the fact that they are enlisted together rn, the fact that they could have done AYS with other members but chose eo. Or the fact that Jimin wrote his name on JK's chest with sunscreen and I dont even want to imagine how he did that. What position they were in that would justify people calling them brothers 😂
You do you anon. I'mma just be over here enjoying Jimin promote the hell out of his favourite JK song.
Tweet
Look at him so proud of his man 🥺🥺
241 notes · View notes
astonmartinii · 1 year ago
Text
into the arms of another part four | max verstappen social media au
pairing: max verstappen x reader
wedding bells are ringing, but so are charles' ears because no one will stop talking about whether he'll make an appearance on the big day
part one | part two | part three | masterlist | tips
yourusername
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liked by maxverstappen1, yourbff1 and 704,390 others
yourusername: a night to remember where you don't remember much of it
view all comments
user1: how do i become part of this friendship group? real answers only.
maxverstappen1: how do i get to marry HER?
danielricciardo: i ask myself that everyday
maxverstappen1: that's not very girls support girls of you daniel
yourusername: yeah daniel, not being a girl's girl in the summer of barbie, i thought more of you...
danielricciardo: lets not get ahead of ourselves here
user2: y/n and max tag teaming daniel is my favourite thing from this relationship
danielricciardo: tag team? don't give me any ideas
yourusername: DANIEL?
maxverstappen1: DANIEL?
danielricciardo: do NOT pretend that y'all have not thought about it
maxverstappen1: we are getting married in a week do not proposition us for a threesome in a public instagram comment section
user3: max pretending like he's never thought about it
user4: how did we get to this point
yourbff1: threesome talk aside, we're so hot
maxverstappen1: hard agree
yourusername: i love you
yourbff1: i love you too
yourusername: and i love you too
yourbff1: you meant max didn't you ...
yourusername: maybe...
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maxverstappen1
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liked by yourusername, danielricciardo and 1,209,831 others
tagged: danielricciardo
maxverstappen1: this is a public service announcement do NOT let daniel ricciardo plan your stag party because you will not remember a single thing
view all comments
user7: the way like 80% of the grid were at this except charles ...
user8: wow colour me shocked he didn't invite the one guy who keeps disrespecting his fiancee to the stag party
danielricciardo: ummmmm this is false? you had a great time.
maxverstappen1: maybe i did all i know is that the bathroom on that plane did not enjoy it i don't think i can touch vodka ever again
danielricciardo: that was all you big boy, you don't know your limit
yourusername: glad to see you didn't kill him before our wedding
danielricciardo: i am really not liking the lack of faith in me
yourusername: he's literally passed out in the second picture daniel
danielricciardo: he's just taking a snooze RIGHT @maxverstappen1
maxverstappen1: yeah ... i just needed my beauty sleep
yourusername: erm you don't need any beauty sleep pretty boy
maxverstappen1: oh, why thank you 😊
user9: she's literally marrying you babe and ur STILL BLUSHING WHEN SHE CALLS YOU PRETTY
user10: this is really not a good sign for charles attending the wedding
user11: yall ever get tired of bringing this shit up HE FUCKED UP this is merely the consequences of his own actions.
user12: and according to mr. leclerc him and max aren't friends so why would he be invited?
danielricciardo
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liked by yourusername, maxverstappen1 and 1,346,780 others
tagged: maxverstappen1, yourusername
danielricciardo: max is currently passed out on my shoulder after talking for an hour straight about how much he loves y/n so here's my favourite pictures of them before they're officially married.
view all comments
user13: why am i actually dead ass crying over this?
user14: no cause the circumstances have been an actual shit show so i'm glad they've managed to get through it and are finally gonna tie the knot !!
user15: i've been in the literal trenches defending y/n and this relationship i deserve an invite to this wedding
yourusername: @maxverstappen1 omg we're so hot
maxverstappen1: i think you're the hot one babe
yourusername: you're literally the hottest man in the world STOP TALKING DOWN ON YOURSELF
maxverstappen1: i know, i know. i'm amazing, sexy and beautiful.
yourusername: TOO RIGHT
user16: is this ^^ positive affirmations
yourusername: yes, he's way too amazing to not believe that himself
user17: so like do they maybe want to adopt me?
landonorris: so as the sexiest groomsmen, can i have the scoop on whether there'll be any sexy bridesmaid
maxverstappen1: who said you're the sexiest?
landonorris: well since charles is out of the running there's a clear winner here - ME
danielricciardo: assuming the best man is not in this conversation cause my face card clears yours
user18: WAIT WHAT
user19: so it's confirmed, he's missing his best friend's wedding over him being petty, all hope in men is gone
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yourusername
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liked by danielricciardo, landonorris and 1,340,944 others
tagged: maxverstappen1
yourusername: no words. love of my life. best day ever. i love you forever maxy
view all comments
user25: OMFG IT LOOKS SO BEAUTIFUL
fernandoalo_oficial: a really beautiful ceremony for my favourites, enjoy your honeymoon and make some time for the old man
yourusername: thank you for coming fernando and thank you for the literal snowmobile idk what we'll do with it but thank you
user26: what kind of a wedding gift is a SNOWMOBILE?
maxverstappen1: a sick one? thanks nando
danielricciardo: what a wonderful day, you guys are so perfect together, thank you for letting me be a part of your day
maxverstappen1: HE CRIED AHAHAHHAHAAHA HE LOVES US SO MUCH HE CRIED
danielricciardo: ummm obviously i watched you pine over her for as long as i've known you. you guys deserve this happiness after everything
yourusername: daniel we love you and your speech was so amazing i nearly cried all of my makeup off
user27: the way the old charles would've given such a banging speech i am in mourning
user28: girl it's their literal wedding post leave the comments about charles for once
sebastianvettel: lovely ceremony you too, much love to your future - seb, hanna and the kids xx
yourusername: thank you for coming seb !! love you guys, let us know if you want us to babysit
maxverstappen1: thank you for your support through all of this seb, you guys are the best
user29: so charles really got no one in his corner lol
maxverstappen1
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liked by landonorris, christianhorner and 1,607,899 others
tagged: yourusername
maxverstappen1: in sickness and in health, the biggest honour of my life is being your husband
view all comments
user30: this is my barbie this does not get any better for me
christianhorner: a wonderful ceremony for the loveliest couple, very grateful to be included in your special day.
masverstappen1: thank you for being there for me, and for not standing on y/n's dress with your two left feet
user31: yall gonna give any context?
user32: i think he's referring to the fact that christian filled the role jos would have at the wedding and during the parents dance, christian would've had a dance with y/n !!
user31: i think my heart just melted wedding of the century
user33: seeing all the wedding content without charles is so weird the whole time we've known y/n her and charles were attached at the hip :/
user34: i beg yall leave it out for one day, he could've been there HE HAD THE INVITATION but he didn't so leave it out
redbullracing: officially THE f1 couple 🫶
landonorris: congratulations and all that jazz but WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT PUNCH
yourusername: sorry lando i gave them the uni recipe
landonorris: oscar was sick on my shoes MY BEAUTIFUL SHOES
maxverstappen1: just send us the bill i can hear you bitching from our room
oscarpiastri: for the record THEY sat me next to kimi and seb and i tried to aim away from your shoes but the world was spinning
user35: okay i need to know the seating plan for this wedding ASAP
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excerpt of the podcast interview of y/n y/ln-verstappen.
yourusername
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liked by landonorris, maxvertsappen1 and 1,905,988 others
tagged: maxverstappen1
yourusername: my honeymoooooooooooooon with my super sexy and lovely HUSBAND
view all comments
user36: okay i've had enough of the cute posts WHERE IS MY HUSBAND?
user37: i crack myself up thinking about them setting up a lil tripod to take these
yourusername: and?
maxverstappen1: we're serving cunt x
user38: did yall see y/n's podcast interview?
user39: yes i'm glad she's got her closure now and can fully move on with her life
alexalbon: you guys are so sickeningly sweet i love you morons
yourusername: why thank you alex
lilymunhe: he said he deserves compensation for his half a season of listening to max pine
maxverstappen1: people think i'm embarrassed of that when LOOK AT MY WIFE OBVIOUSLY I WOULD PINE
maxverstappen1: and bro your apology was the open bar at the wedding
alexalbon: you guys are underestimating just how much this guy spoke about y/n
yourusername: fine we'll post in our albon shoes
albon_pets: this is why we love you y/n
user39: no charles comment... you hear that? peace.
note: i hope yall enjoyed this probably final part of into the arms of another. i hope it wasn’t disappointing lol i love this pairing with all my heart. (also wrote this at 4am on my couch after a MASSIVE FUCK OFF house spider came in my room (my dad said he killed it when i woke him up at 2am) but i was too scared to stay) xx
3K notes · View notes
bitter-me · 10 months ago
Text
Shanti
Blade | M. Reader
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"I’ve got the perfect job for you, so come and follow me."
----------
Blade remembers the day he officially joined the Stellaron Hunters all too clear.
It was a day he could never forget.
"Oh? a new merchandise?"
The man said with his head slightly tilted. He looks at Blade with full interest in his eyes like someone eyeing an item at an auction, a "merchandise" he said.
The man welcomed him with open arms.
There never was an instance where he would lash out in frustration or annoyance. He always has a confident smile on his face, he never voices any of his negative emotions as if he's someone who's working in an industry. A customer service smile always plastered on his face. Day in day out.
After a few days, Blade would rather call him a merchant rather than a Stellaron Hunter. His behavior speaks for itself. He even speaks with merchants as if he's one of them and is sharing stories and advice he learned in his journey.
That got him wondering.
How could this "merchant" be a Stellaron Hunter? It confuses him to no end, someone so warm like that doing something like this? It's quite questionable. That is... Until he was partnered with the man on a mission.
That man... That once merchant-like man who always has a confident smile.. Shows his true colors...
He sees everyone and everything as nothing but items. He showed it repeatedly like how he said. "If it's alive, it’s a customer. If it's dead, it's merchandise."
He didn't even bother to call them with a more fitting word. He just straight up calls them "it." They're all nothing but customers and merchandise to him.
"No flaws, no waste, it’s a business of buying and selling." He said with a wide grin on his face. 'It's merely business. So no hard feelings right?' That's probably what crosses his mind every time he is given a mission by Elio. People are nothing but items in an auction to him as he raised the bid, it just goes to show how valuable you are to him as an item. The higher the bid.. the more valuable you are to him..
"Night in Aurum Alley never sleeps. It's all my turf!"
"So you’re selling blood, makes sense."
"Shut up and sit down. Punch them. Tie them up. Dismember them."
Such words are said with the sweetest and softest voice you'll ever hear, it's like honey, and you can't help but do what he says.
It works like a charm.
How could a man like this posses such a honey-like voice? Such a cursed man...
.
.
"Oh Bladie~"
"What."
[Name] only smiles at Blade's response, aside from Kafka, he is the only one that can call him "Bladie" and the man clearly took pride in it. "Oh nothing~" The man looks at Blade and eyed him up and down as he opens his mouth to say something Blade already cut him off. "No." "But I haven't say anything!"
Blade glances at the other as if he's silently judging him. "You've asked the question many times already."
"Which is?"
"Come work for me."
[Name] groans at Blade's response, that was so not him! He didn't just say it like that, who did he think he is? A barbarian? Where's all the other sweet honeyed words? "I did not say that."
"It's the point of it." "How harsh~"
Blade remain silent as [Name] continues to pester him. This is an everyday thing to him. If not for the fact that [Name] is a valuable member he might have killed him long ago.
----------
"Hello Mr. [Name], I see you got a new "merchandise"... is it---" "My apologies, but he's not for sale."
"He's a merchandise meant for me and me alone~ and I don't like customers who takes what's not theirs~ do anything funny and you'll be my next merchandise."
"Don't worry~ I heard a coat rack out of bones sells well in an auction~"
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