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hxlxnaaa · 2 days ago

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𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬, 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐞

★ 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: after a week of silence following the events that spiraled from your fake relationship, there's a knock at your door in the night. the sequel to wishful thinking, read part 1 here!

★ 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫: sylus

★ 𝐜𝐰/𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬: some angst (happy ending), really sappy make up smut, soft sylus, kinda sub sylus if you squint, body worship, female reader

★ 𝐰𝐜: 3.1k

★ 𝐚/𝐧: woot woot part 2 is finally here, sorry for the wait!! i had envisioned this being a two-parter from the start, and i wanted to do a bit of sweet smut hehe. you'll have to pry soft and caring sylus out of my dead cold hands that man is needy and obsessed w mc :(

It had been a week.

A week of nothing, absolute silence. No calls, no texts. It slowly became as if Sylus never even existed.

It was hell at first. My feelings had come on so fast, and then just like that it was over in the blink of an eye. The game of it all, will they or won’t they find out, the lies, the fun. It was exciting, until I started to get hurt; and I wasn’t going to put my own feelings and misery aside at the expense of everyone else.

Slowly, but surely, the days got easier. I had a break from work where I could take the time to put myself back together, though the band aids didn’t heal the wounds. They just helped to ease the ache.

I started to move on. It had been a week; I was going to go back to work, and act as if none of this ever happened.

Then there was a knock at the door.

It came in the middle of the night, and I just assumed it was one of my neighbors telling me to turn my TV down, or Xavier dropping off a game he had borrowed.

When I opened it, outside in the complex's hallway stood a sopping wet Sylus, drenched from the storm outside. His silver hair was messy, sticking to his forehead, his clothes disheveled as if he had thrown them on in a rush. A look of desperation resided on his face, replacing his usual calm and smug demeanor.

Not seeing him for a week was not something out of the blue, but the big bad leader showing up at my doorstep shivering like a wet cat was. Especially after everything that happened.

My heart felt like it lurched out of my chest, and all the bandages I had tried wrapping around it came loose in one swift movement. All the healing I had done flew outside the door I had opened and stood beside Sylus, mocking me.

I almost slammed the door closed, angry at his audacity, showing up at my place in the heat of the night after not speaking to me. Angry at everything that happened. Angry, hurt.

A whisper of my name escaped his lips, and I froze. It wasn’t often he called me by my name, only addressing me with his usual pet names.

“What are you doing here?” I questioned, hesitant about this whole exchange.

He glared at me, “That’s no way to speak to someone in distress.”

Angry.

I went to shut the door in his face, pissed off and violent, but he stopped it with his hand.

“Wait, I’m sorry.” The apology felt foreign coming out of him, “Can I come in?”

The look on his face went soft, and it almost looked as if he was going to cry. Everything about this was so out of character for him, and if I wasn’t so angry, maybe I’d even feel sorry for him.

Without a word, I pulled the door back open, stepping aside for him to come in. He was obviously cold, and it seemed like was trying his hardest to keep himself together.

“Don’t sit on the couch, you’re wet.” Maybe I was being mean, maybe he was undeserving of my anger, maybe letting him in was a mistake. I sighed, “Sylus, why are you here?”

“You’ve been ignoring me.” His words were hard, and his stare was piercing. Normally I would feel uncomfortable under his gaze, but the exasperation I felt from his words outweighed that.

I scoffed, “I’ve been ignoring you? You haven’t reached out, what was there to ignore?”

“You’ve been ignoring me, you’ve been pulling back. I know you know I’m not stupid, kitten.”

He was right, he wasn’t stupid. When I started pulling away, he started pushing harder, and I could tell he knew I was almost done.

“Okay?” I crossed my arms, avoiding his eyes, “Then you started ignoring me. We’re even.”

“No.” He shot out, taking a step towards me, “That’s not how that works. I was waiting for anything from you, but it never came.”

“What did I do? What did I do wrong?” Sylus tilted his head forward, and I started to finally feel guilty. All of this was so different for him, when Sylus was upset he became mean, aggressive. He put up walls, started fights. For him to be so…pitiful, where was all of this coming from?

“I don’t understand what you mean-” He cut me off with a forced laugh, “You don’t understand? I don’t know how much more obvious I can be, sweetie.”

“Okay,” He paused, “I love you.”

My heart stopped. For a second, the world stopped spinning. It’s like everything, all at once, came to a halt with Sylus’ confession.

“You…love me?” The words tasted bitter on my tongue. This was not how this was supposed to go. I loved him, that’s why I had to stop all of this, so it didn’t continue. It couldn’t continue. He cannot love me back.

“Why else do you think I threw myself into all of that? Why do you think I didn’t want anybody else to do it? Because I was bored? I have plenty of other things to do in my spare time.” His voice was hoarse, almost pleading for me to understand.

“Sylus, I-”

“For a second, I thought you loved me too.” Sylus sounded desperate, “But then you pulled back. You disappeared.”

He grabbed my hands, “Tell me, sweetie, what did I do wrong?”

“You love me.” I whispered, “That’s what you did wrong.”

Sylus let go, taking a step back. He ran his hand through his hair, a sorry attempt to pull himself back together, “I apologize,” He said, “I misunderstood this then.”

I looked at him, his appearance disordered and disheartened. The once prideful and arrogant man was now broken down to nothing but a shell of himself, and I realized the cause of that was me. Sylus was never one to back down from a fight, yet here he was throwing up a white flag.

He went to leave, turning his back to me. Turning his back to whatever was happening, breaking the character I had come to know. Going down without a fight. This broken man wasn’t Sylus.

“I love you too.” The words came out rushed, in a hurry to stop him. Announcing my own declaration of love wasn’t something I had intended to do, planning to keep it inside for all of eternity, letting the poisonous feeling bubble inside until it ate me alive.

Sylus stopped in his tracks.

“Then why is this wrong?” He didn’t turn back around to face me, and I wasn’t sure I wanted him to. I’d crumble and fall if I saw his eyes.

“It would never work,” I let it all out, everything I had been holding in for so long, all the insecurities I had collected regarding any kind of relationship I could have with Sylus. “I’m a hunter, and you’re the head of Onychinus. We’re in two different worlds, living such different lives, it’s doomed. All of this is doomed.”

“Do you really think I care?”

His fingers suddenly gripped my chin with a possessive hold, as if he thought I might run off again. Trying to pull myself away, his grip tightened on my face, as well as the hold he had on my heart.

“It doesn’t matter if you care or not,” I gave him a weak glare, trying to scare him off, “don’t be selfish, Sylus. We’ll both just get hurt.”

Sylus lips twitched downwards, “I think you should allow yourself to be selfish for once.” His grasp left my face, “Do what you please.”

We stood in silence for a second, and I set my gaze upon the floor to avoid his stare, his red eyes penetrating my soul.

“What are you thinking?” He finally asked. I hesitated, not exactly sure what the right answer really was. I could continue to fight this feeling, or jump into the water.

“I’m scared.” I confessed, “I don’t want to get hurt. I can’t go through all of that, all of the heartache when things go wrong.”

“Now why do you think I would ever let that happen, sweetie?”

Sylus grabbed my hand, placing it against his heart, “This beats for you, I live for you.” I felt the quick, erratic rhythm of his heartbeat under my fingers, “I never stop missing you when you’re not around, every second you’re not beside me is misery.”

“I'll love you until my last breath, and even in the heavens too.” He pulls my hand up, placing a kiss against my palm, “I will never let anything happen to you, I could never live with myself if I hurt you.”

He kisses the back of my hand, my wrist, all the way up my arm to my collarbone, “I will do anything to make this work - if this falls apart, I’ll just put it back together. I need you by my side.”

I feel his soft breathing against the crook of my neck, and goosebumps rise on my skin. I want to fall into him, let myself become loose in his embrace and learn to trust his promises.

“But if you don’t want it, just say that.” Sylus presses one last kiss to the skin of my neck, “Tell me you don’t want this and I’ll leave through that door, and I won’t bother you again.”

“Sylus…” I can only manage a whisper of his name. Everything else gets caught in my throat, my mind a tangled mess of emotions.

His face is inches from mine, and he quickly gives me an amused smile, “That's not a no.”

Before I can respond, even think of something to say, he captures my lips with his own. The strong smell of his cologne mixed with the taste of his mouth against mine makes me dizzy. The room and everything in it has suddenly become so warm, and my skin feels as if it’s been lit on fire.

Sylus pushes my body up against the wall behind us, hands trailing up my curves, grabbing at anything he can. His fingers embed themselves in my hips, waist, thighs, trying to pull me any closer.

“I’ll ask you again, sweetie,” He pulls away and I’m left standing there breathless with an unwavering grip on his (still) damp sweater, “do you want me to stop?”

I tangle my fingers in his wet hair, bringing his face back down to mine.

“No.” I whisper against Sylus’ lips, before crashing mine against his feverishly. Every feeling I had for him, everything I had suppressed, all of it was going into this kiss. He groaned into my mouth, his hold on me becoming tighter.

It all made perfect sense; The way our lips moved in sync, how our bodies fit perfectly together, our minds addicted to the thoughts of one another. We were, to put it simply, made for this. Our souls intertwined with ease as we found solace and safety in each other. All of the fear I had been plagued with dissipated with the consolation of Sylus’ body against mine. I was no longer scared of this not working, all I cared about was him.

After all, even a broken clock is right twice a day.

With one swift movement Sylus lifted me off my feet and cradled me with ease, maneuvering around my apartment as if it was his own.

Before I could even register I was in my bedroom, I was pinned against the mattress in the safe confine of his arms.

“Please,” His breathing was ragged, “let me show you how well I can treat you, let me touch you how you deserve.”

I lean up and kiss him between his furrowed brows, and he takes the opportunity to dive for my neck.

“Please.” Sylus repeats again. His eyes are practically begging. I give him a nod.

Stripping me of my shirt, he places gentle kisses down my torso down to the waistband of my shorts. Goosebumps rise on my skin from the cold air mixed with his gentle touch. His rough, calloused hands hold my hips like glass, a finger slowly pulling my shorts off my legs. A hiss of air leaves his lungs when Sylus sits back to take me in.

“Fuck.” He whispers, “You have no idea how long I’ve waited for... Thought about having you like this.”

I give him a sheepish smile, “Is it worth the wait?”

His adams apple bobs in his throat as he swallows whatever words were going to leave his lips, running his hands up my thighs and waist. Sylus’ eyes travel up my figure, almost as if memorizing every dip and curve of my body.

“Every single second was worth it.” His voice was soft, “You’re perfect.”

Sylus leans down, pressing his lips to the bone where my hips and pelvis meet. He picks my leg up, lightly lifting it over his shoulder, resting his head on the inside of my thigh and looking up at me through his eyelashes.

He looks angelic, pure almost, glowing in the moonlight that spills through the window. His dominant, hard-bitten and arrogant exterior had disintegrated into nothing but his surrender as he lay open and bare for me in between my legs. All the walls I knew Sylus to have crumbled and fell, his only goal to show me that I’m loved; serving to please.

The tip of one of his fingers slides up my slit, and my breath catches in my throat. Sylus pauses, “Is this okay?”

“More than okay.” I confirm.

He quickly discards the cloth separating him from the heat in between my thighs, placing a gentle kiss to the place that craves him the most.

A moan escapes me as his lips latch onto my clit. My hands weave themselves through his hair, “Oh God, Sy- Do that again-”

Sylus groans into my core, worshiping the sex and heart that weeps for him, and only him. I twitch my hips towards his face, my mind reeling with the feeling that emits from his mouth.

“Yes-” He pushes a finger into me, easing the ache deep inside, “Be greedy, kitten, use me as you wish.”

I can only manage whimpers of his name, my brain incoherent and high on his mouth and touch as his tongue and fingers work magic. Tugging on the silver strands that grace his pretty head, the moan that leaves him vibrates against me, and I think for a second I might be done for.

“Mm, Sylus, wait-”

“That’s it, sweetie. Getting close?” His fingers curl up inside me and I shake my head, not wanting to finish so soon, “No, I-”

He pulls back and sits up as soon as the word leaves me, and I almost sob at the loss of contact. Sylus’ eyes scan my face with concern, and I pull him back down on top of me. His chest heaving against mine, he plants a kiss to the corner of my eye, “I thought I-”

“Not yet, fuck me.” Cutting him off, I push my body up against his.

“Of course, kitten,” Within seconds his pants and briefs were discarded somewhere in the room, my thighs instinctively wrapping around his hips, “who am I to deny you?”

His hard length pressed up against my entrance, the desperation making me crazy.

“Sylus, please-” I tried to push my hips forward, longing for more. He cupped my cheek, pressing a gentle kiss to my forehead, inching deeper agonizingly slow, “Patience, sweetie. I don’t want to hurt you.”

“You won’t!” Despite my reassurance, Sylus’ eyes were still filled with worry. Using my legs that were wrapped around him, I yanked his hips forward and with one fell swoop he was to the hilt inside.

Spasming around him at the sudden fullness, I sunk my teeth into his collarbone to stifle a scream. I could feel myself gripping him like a vice, his moaning and panting in my ear a sweet confirmation.

“I told you I could do it.” I lapped at the broken skin where I had bitten.

Sylus laughed lowly against my lips, “I didn’t mean to doubt you, kitten.”

The movement of his hips were rhythmic, every thrust sending me deeper into a spiral of love and pleasure. My thoughts were nothing but static, only focusing on the beautiful man in front of me and how good he was capable of making me feel.

His own moans were strangled, groaning praises and muttering sweet nothings into my ear. Sylus thrusted deeply into me, tightly holding my hand as if he thought I and this moment were going to disappear. His eyes would snap open and flutter closed with every movement, relishing in the feeling of our bodies together.

My skin was electric, fireworks setting off in every corner of my being. My mind spun with the addictive feeling and taste of Sylus’ sweet lips on mine, his fingers digging into my hips.

He and I together were not doomed, though us being apart was. We were magnetic, velcro, sworn to be together. We were aligned in ways I wasn’t sure was even possible.

“Tell me again that you love me,” Sylus trapped my head in between his arms, “tell me that this is okay and you want it.” His eyes were misty, his voice hoarse.

“I love you.” I mewled as his thrusts were getting faster, harder.

“I can be good for you, I’ll take care of you, please just let me be yours. Please be mine, let me have this.”

The familiar feeling rose inside, and I knew I was close, “Yes, Sy- I’m all yours.”

“I love you, I love you, I love- Fuck-” His hips snapped against mine at a pace that had me seeing stars, “My girl, you’re my girl. Mine-”

His girl.

I came undone with a loud moan of Sylus’ name, scratching my fingers sharply down his back, arching myself deep against him. His hips stuttered against mine, reaching his own high. Wrapping each other in our arms, trying to pull one another any impossibly closer. So close our souls could touch.

I didn’t just want Sylus, no, I needed him. It wasn’t until I found him that I discovered the large, empty sorrowful space that resided in my life. A space that I was always too scared to confront, a space that he fit into so perfectly.

Some force in this massive universe decided to pair me with him, to make me his, and I was tired of being scared and ignoring it.

“I love you, Sylus.”

(divider by cafekitsune)

tag list!! ty all for the support <3

@crowskitten22 @peacedreamer14 @phantom-101 @evilldentists @ionlypartiallyslay @fealy @sellelqvz @huachengnism @mandysfanfics @shiorihoshino @sinnamon-bunn @knifep-rty @l0bulariia @knifep-rty @yoyach @ononpetitecroissant @syluslittlecrows @beewilko @unbetirtlt @sylus-crow

#sylus x reader #sylus x you #sylus x y/n #love and deepspace sylus #sylus #l&ds sylus #lnds sylus #lads sylus #lnds #lnds smut #lnds fluff #lnds angst #sylus love and deepspace #sylus smut #sylus fluff #sylus x mc #love and deep space

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txkby · 2 days ago

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My experience with the Void State.

Before I discovered the Void State, I practiced meditation regularly in 2022 (literally the year of the Void State on Tumblr), the sensations I had when meditating were truly exquisite, that tranquility and peace are simply incomparable with people, material things, etc.

I swear that nothing has filled my soul like those sensations.

(This is very important, remember it)

I stopped meditating afterwards because I didn't have time and when I wanted to do it I fell asleep, like when you want to get to the Void, don't you think? LOL

I discovered the Void around the beginning of 2023, but I never gave it any importance, I've almost never liked the methods, because it became obsessed, and that's what I did, I became obsessed.

I became so obsessed with the Void that I was constantly looking for information everywhere, on Google, here on Tumblr, Twitter, YouTube, and in endless places.

And every day I spent time doing methods to get there, meditations, affirmations, etc. But I just couldn't get there, I couldn't.

I felt so bad guys, I felt tired, have you ever felt that tiredness that feels more like giving up? That's what I felt.

I felt dissatisfied with my life, and it's hard because you feel ungrateful to the universe, to people, to everything.

But I kept on trying every day to get to the Void, but again, I never got there, not that way.

So I went back to the beginning, I went back to the basics, what is the Void? How do you get there? And I realized that I forgot what the Void really was, I forgot everything because of my desperation and obsession to get there.

What I did to get to the Void was the following:

- I gave up, but not giving up by throwing in the towel, but by letting myself go.

- let it go, detach myself from it

- remember that the Void is a state, it is something attached to us that simply cannot be prevented

- I stopped trying to reach the Void with extreme methods, I stopped trying to get there with steps, with rules.

- I stopped forcing myself to reach the Void, because the Void is not effort, it is relaxation, it is letting go, it is surrendering

- I changed my focus, instead of wanting to reach the Void by manifesting my desires, I changed it to simply having a good time, to relax

- I started doing simple meditations, nothing like "meditation to reach the Void, meditation for this, meditation for that", no, just simple meditations.

- don't look for symptoms because that takes you away from relaxation, it takes you away from the key to reach the Void

- relax, that's the Void, never forget it

And I remembered that the sensations I had when meditating for 2022 were the same as the Void, which means that I had possibly reached the Void State at that time, but since I didn't know about the subject, I didn't make an effort to reach the Void, I just wanted to meditate for fun, and this is very important because when we concentrate and force ourselves to reach the Void, we don't get there, when we are desperate to reach the void we won't get there, when we are anxious to reach the Void we won't get there.

So, after doing all that, remembering all that, I reached the Void.

And it didn't take me more than 1 week after to understand everything I just said.

In the Void I felt what I felt when meditating, that exquisite tranquility, that peace, that happiness, and of course you have no emotions, thoughts and you don't feel your body at all.

I didn't manifest much, I only changed my name, time of birth, my personality, my mentality and voice, because that was why I wanted to get there, I felt bad about myself because during 2020 to 2022 I suffered from depression, my father passed away, the changes that occurred in those times affected me mentally, I had social anxiety, I suffered, it was horrible.

But by manifesting my change of mentality and personality my perspective on life changed, therefore now I am happy.

The thing about my time of birth was simply for fun LOL, and my name, my old name, mmm 🫤 , I never felt identified with it, I was not her.

Like all of you, I suffered for wanting to get to the Void, for looking for symptoms

And not letting myself in getting there, because of my focus, because of my low self-confidence, because of my obsession, because of my desperation.

Give up to enter the Void.

And well guys, that's my experience with the Void, this post is so long but necessary, byee.

(I hope the translation is correct LOL) 🫂😝

#4d reality #affirmations #loa blog #loassumption #master manifestor #void state #manifest #void state success story #neville goddard #void success stories #loa tumblr #law of assumption #loablr #void #manifesting #manifestation

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kdollikesthighs · 22 hours ago

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One way ticket: part 1

Itzy Yeji x m reader This is the first part of a mini-series I'm trying out to get me back into writing by myself. This part is all fluff, no smut here yet. Later parts will have smut, so stick around for that? Word count: 2,344

The faint mumblings of the station’s announcement system were humming in the background. The air was cool and carried the metallic tang of distant rain. The kind of atmosphere that makes you think about the bittersweet moments in life. You tightened your grip on the handle of your suitcase, plastic handle digging into your palm as you checked the train schedule for the third time that evening. Despite what your anxiety was telling you, you weren't running late. In fact, you had arrived an hour earlier than you needed to—anxious, restless, and uncertain about the journey ahead. The train would be here any minute now.

The one-way ticket in your pocket felt heavier than its weight in paper should have allowed. The destination printed on it was one you had hoped never to return to: the town where everything had started—and where you had left everything behind. But here you were, standing on this station platform, waiting for the train that would take you back.

The overhead speakers crackled to life, announcing the imminent arrival of your train.You adjusted the strap of your backpack, your heart beating faster with every passing second. The platform wasn’t crowded, but there were enough people milling about to make you feel uneasy. Couples whispered to each other, families struggled with their luggage, and a few solo travelers stared blankly at their phones.

That’s when you saw her.

At first, it was just a fleeting sense of familiarity, a trick of the mind in a sea of strangers. This wasn’t your hometown, she wouldn’t be here. But then she turned her head, and your chest tightened as recognition hit you like a freight train. Yeji.

She was leaning against one of the station’s old iron pillars. Her hair was loose, flowing down her shoulders in soft waves, and she wore a grey sweater over a simple white shirt and black jeans. She looked… as pretty as when you left. Like a memory brought to life, sharper and more vivid than you could ever remember.

For a moment, you thought about turning away, pretending this couldn’t be real. But then her eyes met yours, and there was no escaping it anymore. Her expression froze, her lips parting slightly as if she couldn’t quite believe what she was seeing. You felt the same.

She recovered faster than you did, her posture straightening as she began walking toward you. Your feet, however, seemed rooted to the spot.

She only voices a single word, but it's the way she says your name that cuts through any illusions you had of avoiding your past. It was a sound you hadn’t heard in years, yet it struck a chord deep within you.

You cleared your throat, trying to mask the chaos inside. "Yeji. Hi."

Her pace slowed as she came to a stop a few feet away. Up close, you could see the subtle changes time had made to her face. She looked… more mature, more assured. The playful energy she used to radiate was still hiding in there, but it was controlled now, grounded in a way that made her seem even more beautiful.

"I can’t believe it’s you," she said, her tone equal parts surprise and apprehension.

You managed a forced smile. "Yeah. Me neither."

The silence that followed was heavy, filled with unspoken words and memories that neither of you seemed ready to confront. Yeji was the first to break the tension.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, her head tilting slightly as she studied you. Her voice was softer now, almost hesitant.

You hesitated, unsure of how much to reveal. How much you had the right to reveal. "I… I’m heading back to town. For a while."

Her brows knitted together in a faint frown, shock ever present on her face. as if those were the last words she expected you to say. "Back to town? Why?"

"My aunt," you said, the words feeling heavy in your mouth. "She passed away. I’m handling the arrangements and everything."

Her expression softened, and she looked down briefly before meeting your gaze again. "I’m sorry. She was always so kind to me."

"Yeah," you said, your throat tightening. "She was."

Another silence stretched between you, and you couldn’t tell if it was more awkward or painful. You shifted your weight from one foot to the other, glancing toward the train that had come to a stop behind you.

"Are you taking this one?" she asked, nodding toward the train.

"Yeah," you replied, confirming your destination. "Last one heading that way tonight."

"Same.”

You weren’t supposed to be surprised at this. For all you knew, she still lived where you left her. You couldn’t help but be shocked nonetheless. You were about to spend the next several hours on the same train. Together. Your stomach churned at the thought. This wasn’t how you’d imagined seeing her again, if you ever saw her again at all.

She glanced down at her ticket, then back at you. "Well… I guess we’d better get on."

You nodded, though your feet felt like they were moving on autopilot as you followed her toward the train.

The compartment you entered was relatively empty, its rows of seats illuminated by the harsh overhead lights. Yeji walked down the aisle and chose a seat by the window, setting her bag on the floor beside her. You hesitated, not sure if it was alright, before sitting down in the seat across from hers. It felt like the most natural thing to do, and yet, your heart was pounding as if you’d just committed a crime.

The train gave a low groan as it began to pull out of the station, the rhythm of the wheels on the tracks quickly settling into a steady cadence. It was the one thing keeping you calm. You stared out the window, your mind racing with a thousand thoughts you couldn’t untangle.

Yeji broke the silence again. "So… how have you been?"

You blinked, caught off guard by the question. "Uh… I’ve been okay. Busy, I guess. Work, life. You know how it is."

She raised an eyebrow. "Do I?"

Ouch. She had all the right to call you out. You winced at her response. "Right. Sorry. That was…"

"Generic?" she interrupted, her lips curving into a smile that didn’t reach her eyes. It was performative. She wasn’t going to take any of your standoffish bullshit.

You sighed, running a hand through your hair halfheartedly. "Yeah. Generic."

She nodded, her gaze drifting toward the window, clearly disappointed. For a while, we sat in silence, the sound of the train’s wheels filling the void again. You couldn’t help but glance at her, noticing the way her fingers tapped lightly against her knee, a habit you remembered all too well. She was nervous, too. Uneasy, even.

"I… I didn’t expect to see you," you admitted, taking your responsibility to break the silence this time.

She turned back to you, her expression distant. Her guard was up. "Neither did I."

The weight of her gaze made it hard to breathe, and for a moment, you couldn’t help but think about all the things you wanted to say. But the words wouldn’t come. You wouldn’t allow them to come. You had no right. Instead, you looked away, focusing on the blur of the dark countryside outside the window.

She sat across from you, leaning slightly against the window, her chin resting on her hand as her gaze followed the passing darkness outside. The faint glow from the overhead light illuminated her features—the soft curve of her cheek, the sharp line of her jaw. She was both familiar and unfamiliar, a memory brought vividly back to life.

“So,” she continued, not letting another silence fill the void between you. “How long are you staying?”

You hesitated. You didn’t have the answer to that question. “I’m not sure. However long it takes to handle everything with my aunt’s estate.”

She nodded but didn’t look at you. Her fingers played idly with the strap of her bag, another one of her habits you remembered all too well. It struck you how surreal this was—sharing a train compartment with her after all these years. You were two people carrying the weight of a shared past, both of you struggling with how to unpack it.

“And after that?” she asked. “Are you planning to stay?”

You shook your head with uncertainty. “No. I… I don’t think so.”

Her eyes drifted downwards slowly as her tensed shoulders slumped ever so slightly. She turned to face you, her brows furrowing slightly. “So it’s temporary.”

“Yeah.”

Yeji studied you for a moment, her dark cat-like eyes sharp and assessing. It was unnerving how easily she could see through you, even now. She didn’t say anything, just nodded and went back to looking out the window. You could feel the distance between you two grow, as real and unyielding as the space separating your seats.

After a while she spoke up again. Her tone was casual, almost offhanded. “You’ve changed.”

You raised an eyebrow. “Have I?”

“Yeah. You’re quieter.”

You let out a dry laugh. “Maybe I’ve just run out of things to say.”

She gave you a look—half amused, half skeptical. “That’s hard to imagine. You used to talk my ear off.”

“Things are different now,” you said, shame undermining your volume.

Her expression shifted, and for a moment, she looked like she wanted to say something. But she stayed silent, staring out the window again. The train slowed down as we approached a station, and the sound of the brakes screeching filled the air.

You wanted to ask her about her life, about what she’d been doing all this time, but the questions felt intrusive, like prying open a door to a room you no longer had the right to enter. Still, the curiosity gnawed at you. She was here, sitting across from you, and you couldn’t ignore the pull she had on you.

“What about you?” You asked finally. “How have you been?”

She shrugged at your question, her fingers still toying with the strap of her bag. “I’ve been fine. Busy. Work keeps me on my toes.”

You nodded, unsure how to respond. The conversation felt stilted, like you were two strangers making polite small talk. But you weren’t strangers—never were. There was too much history between you.

“And what about…” you hesitated, unsure if you should even go there. “What about everything else? Family, friends?”

Yeji glanced at you, a hint of a smile tugging at the corners of her lips. Like a sense of reassurance that you still remembered everyone you left. “Everyone’s good. Life goes on, you know?”

“Yeah, it does,” you said, though the words felt hollow. Life did go on, but it had a way of leaving certain things behind—people, memories, opportunities.

The train picked up speed again, the lights outside streaking into a blur. The silence between you stretched out, not quite comfortable but not unbearable either anymore. You could feel her presence like a magnet, drawing you in despite the invisible wall she’d built around herself. You wanted to break through it, to reach her, but you didn’t know how.

“So, you’re back for your aunt,” she said, her voice cutting through your thoughts. “That must be hard.”

“It is,” you admitted. “She was… she was always there for me. One of the few people I could count on.”

Yeji’s expression softened, and she nodded. “She was a good woman. She always made me feel welcome, even when…” She trailed off, her gaze dropping to her hands. “Even when things weren’t so great between us.”

You swallowed hard, the guilt washing over you. Your aunt had adored Yeji, treated her like family. She was devastated when you left, upset you’d leave this life behind for stupid reasons, but she never stopped sending letters for birthdays. Trying to maintain contact.

“Yeah,” you said, your voice crumbling. “She had a way of making people feel that way. She cared, you know? A lot."

Yeji didn’t respond, but you could see the emotions playing across her face—nostalgia, sadness, maybe even a hint of anger. You wanted to say something to make it better, to bridge the gap between the two of you, but you didn’t know where to start.

The train entered another tunnel, and the lights in the compartment flickered slightly. In the brief darkness, you could feel the weight of everything unsaid pressing down on you. You wanted to reach out, but you held back. You didn’t think you had the right—not after everything you’d done.

When the lights stabilized again, Yeji was looking at you, her expression wavering. Her voice grew quiet, almost pleading. “Do you ever think about it?”

“About what?”

“About what could have been. If things had gone differently. If you hadn’t left.”

The elephant in the room. You never gave her any explanation before, and you struggled to find the right response now. Did you think about it? Every damn day. But saying that out loud felt too raw, too vulnerable.

“Yeah,” you said finally. Maybe it was time to be vulnerable. After removing yourself from her life without being able to forget her, that was the least you owed her. “I think about it.”

She nodded , her gaze dropping to her lap in understanding. “Me too.”

The confession hung in the air between you, heavy with meaning. For a moment, it felt like the years of distance and silence had melted away, leaving only the two of you and the fragile connection you’d once shared. But the moment passed, and the wall between you was back. There was nothing you could say.

The train rumbled on, carrying you closer to a destination you weren't sure you were ready to face. But for the first time in years, you felt a flicker of hope—fragile and tentative, but real. And you knew that no matter what happened, you couldn’t let this chance slip away. Not again.

#kpop fanfic #kpop fanfiction #m reader #male reader #kpop smut #smut #yeji smut #itzy smut

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yoru-exe · 3 days ago

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PHAINON ۫ ꣑ৎ woe of a hero

"we were just about to leave marmoreal market when the big bad guys blocked our path. they were everywhere!", the boy recounted his story with so much vigor. thankfully, your young patient didn't move too much for you to attend to his sprained ankle.

under your makeshift medical tent, the wounded were resting as they waited for the heirs to provide their needed assistance managing the damage left by nikador's titankins. a lot of building and materialistic goods were affected, but so far, you've only observed minor injuries.

"but then mr. chartonus came and helped us! i wanted to go back but now that my ankle is sprained..".

"chartonus is in a good state, you have nothing to fear", phainon suddenly appeared behind you, and the boy's eyes widened with delight.

"lord phainon!".

you kept your composure but truth be told, you're as delighted as he was, if not more. you've been waiting all day for your lover to stop by with no avail. part of you were happy that perhaps he's not in any urgent need for your care. another part of you were worried sick if something had happened to him.

the boy and his mother excused themselves right after you completed your treatment to find their savior to thank him. now that you had your attention undivided on phainon, you moved to inspect him. but before you get to do anything, phainon grabbed your face by the chin and pressed a chaste kiss to your lips.

"i wanted to come by sooner. but the market was in a bad shape and i can't just turn a blind eye. tribbie told me you're unharm, but still, i apologise for making you wait".

your legs felt weak. if it wasn't for his strong arms wrapped around your body, you would have fallen. but you managed to shake your head, "i'm glad you're alright".

when you caught what you just said, your attention was pulled back to his state, "did you sustain any injury?". the hero chuckled. he loved how attentive you were to your responsibility even though you could've just bask in each others' presence and forget about the world for a moment.

"i received a few, although nothing too serious. i've patched them up, but it'd be great if you could have a look at the ones on my back. i can't quite reach them by myself". you nodded and rushed to gather a fresh supply of medical equipments. when you returned, your lover was halfway stripping the top part of his clothes, making you jump.

he tilted his head with an unspoken question, and you mentally kicked yourself to recenter your focus on the task at hand.

as you fell into the rhythm of your work, you noticed how phainon had been uncharacteristically quiet. you decided to give him a moment. after all, the holy city that ought to be the safest haven just received a heavy attack. he must be shaken to an extent.

your worry resurfaced when his silence persisted even after you finished. he didn't even notice you've moved yourself to stand in front of him.

gently, you cupped his face in your palms, caressing his skin, careful not to startled him.

"o-oh, hey".

"hey yourself. is everything alright?".

he forced a smile, trying to reassure you that it wasn't concerning enough for you to worry about, but knowing you, you'd probably see pass his deception. he looked away, sighing, "just a few things on my mind".

he stopped himself there, and you took it as a sign that he's not ready to open his worry up to you, yet. it's something you've grown to respect. you couldn't begin to imagine the burden he carries as the prophesised saviour of the world. the least you could do was comfort him, even if just a little bit.

you closed the gaps between the two of you, embracing him close to your heart. "you can confine in me when you're ready. i'll always be here".

he was unresponsive for a moment, letting your words sink in. then, he wrapped his arms around your body. the tightness didn't hurt in any manner, but it's apparent how desperate he was, as if trying not to drown in his own dark thoughts with you as his anchor.

there were a thousand things he could say in reply. he could even began to sing an ode to your love or recite a romantic poem or two (you know by experience he would), but he simply said, "thank you", pressing his face deeper into your embrace. you could feel his lips stretching to form a smile, a peaceful one this time.

your slowly swayed with him still in your hold. relief filled your system to the sound of his laughter which made you smile yourself.

"do you know how much i love you?"

"do enlighten me, if you'd be so kind", you leaned down to meet his lips halfway. this time, he took his time to savour it with only you in his mind.

"i wish i could just stay here", he exhaled. "do you think aglaea will be mad if i'm not out there playing hero?".

"oh i think she'll lose her mind". to that, the both of you shared a laughter.

he excused himself when an elderly women seek your medical assistance, but not before he promised to stop by again later. you watched his wide back, the hero so strong-bodied, yet his heart was so tender. silently, you sent him a prayer for a safe return.

✿ AUTHOR'S NOTE ✿

boy oh boy, this man sure YAPS. anywho, i only managed to watch bits and pieces of the playthrough as of now so please forgive me for any canon details that i missed. i also would like to note that i do not think our beloved snowy is tired of being a hero, just a little overwhelmed at times, so please don't take this too seriously

#honkai star rail #hsr #honkai star rail x reader #hsr x reader #phainon #phainon x reader

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natalchartnurtures · 2 days ago

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PAC: Channeled Messages From The Person On Your Mind *Singles Edition*

Let's feed our delusions. (jk)

Pile 1: "You make me feel so good, like I'm on cloud nine. You make everything so, sooo worth it. I feel like a winner with you around... and the thing is.. you have no clue lol. I wanna win you over and show you off. You've no idea how you make me feel... you being your hot-ass self sitting there, looking so cute. I keep so much of my feelings to myself, but all I wanna do is overcome this impossible (and seemingly invisible) barrier between us! Ahhhhhh, it drives me nuts on some days, ugh!

You feel like a blessing to me. I didn't know somebody like you could exist?! Ahhhhh. I've been alone all my life, but you make me wanna not be alone anymore... it's not something I expected to feel, I have to be honest lol.

I'm not ready to come toward you right now, though. Trust me, I KNOW I must do something, but my anxiety holds me back... my limiting beliefs hold me, and I have no clue how to overcome them. I wish I could figure it out so I could BE WITH YOU ALREADY!

I'm being patient, though... with myself and with the situation between us. I keep my cards close, so you probably wouldn't even know any of this... sheesh, I don't wanna look like a fool in front of you. I'm scared you'd think less of me—it would KILL me if you did—so I keep you at arm's length.

Your presence TRIGGERS some very intense feelings inside me. I feel so exposed and vulnerable with you around, so overwhelmed, and it's not easy, you know? My heart's been broken before, and I'm afraid of getting it broken again. That's definitely a part of the fear you make me feel. I've had to be on the defense with people, especially from my past... relationships have not been easy, and so I guess I gotta work on that.

Go listen to Taylor Swift's 'Lover' anytime you miss me... that's a song I dedicate to you, sweetie, until I see you next time."

If you'd like to know more about your person's thoughts for you, you can book a reading with me! You can find the details here :]

Pile 2: "GIRL, I have been going THROUGH IT, sheesh... I've been holding on for dear life 'cause lately, it feels like everything is out to get me, uk? One thing goes straight to hell after another, and I've just been so caught up with everything. You know what's been keeping me going, though? You. I've been dreaming about you most nights... I think about you when I can, to help me get through what I need to get through. The thought of you gives me strength, girlie. Every time you cross my mind, I get so weak in the knees! I look forward to every time I get to see you... (even if we live in the same house lmao!)

I feel you all around me all the time—it's lovely. I love how you make me feel... you take away my troubles, even if just for a sec. For that, I am immensely grateful!

You're not in my life right now, though... but I'm PRAYING and WISHING and HOPING that I might have a shot with you. The hope of a possibility of being with you is what makes the hard days sooo much easier. I seriously want a solid relationship with you more than anything else! (If we aren't in one already 👀)

Right now, I'm getting my shit together, and I hope you'll be waiting for me on the other side, just like in my dreams. You give me hope in a hopeless world again. You're such a light to me... you don't even know it.

I'm always watching you, though... even when you don't know—ESPECIALLY when you don't notice! Haha, it's my favorite thing in the world. I think you've got the prettiest voice in the world. Gosh, I just wanna be with you, but BOY, I've got my hands tied up right now. I'm letting go and letting God decide when it's time for us to come together. You make me wanna have faith in something greater than us.

But I assure you, I'm coming for ya once I'm done figuring everything in my life. Oh, and I love you. ✨"

If you'd like to know more about your person's thoughts for you, you can book a reading with me! You can find the details here :]

Pile 3: "You make me so horny. I can't even sit right when I'm around you. WHY DO YOU HAVE THIS EFFECT ON ME?! (Not that I'm complaining tbh, I love it haha). But seriously, how can someone be so goddamn hot?! How?! Jeez, I LOVE your body! I get so many 18+ thoughts—it's insane. I apologize for being so direct, but it's just what you do to me, sorry not sorry :p

You make me wanna run toward you EVERY TIME I see you! All I wanna do is be all up on you, loving you, kissing you, and hugging you. Man, it's hard to be around you and not be close to you, especially when there's other people around. I LOVE TALKING TO YOU, and I don't ever wanna stop talking to you, ugh.

You make my heart explode! I've never had feelings this deep for anybody in my life (I WISH I was kidding, jeez). You make me wanna act mature and romantic n stuff... 🙃 (Usually, I'm not like this, btw).

I wanna be where you're at, vibrationally speaking, but I've got some things I gotta take care of. I've got some old cycles I've been on—my old bs. I'm working hard on it and releasing it as we speak, and this is helping me come toward you. Might take me a while, though, ngl 👀🙄. But I'll be there before you know it, princess!

I WANT our relationship to begin between the two of us SO BAD, but I can't see how that's gonna happen yet. It feels like it's not the right time yet? Idk... it's really frustrating, though. I'm trying not to do anything stupid to sabotage our new beginning, though. I'm just going with the flow of things and listening to my intuition about our situation. Don't worry!

I see you as my forever, my one and only. I can't explain it, but I just know. You're the one for me, and honestly, it's breaking my heart that I can't actively pursue you right now since it's supposed to be 'divinely guided' 🙄 Like, Universe, could you please hurry up and get me to MY baby, ugh.

You're so beautiful, you're my goddess, my other half. I can't wait to get to you and spoil you and have a PROPER relationship with you. I hate that we can't come together and confess to each other yet... it's maddening. I know we're destined to be, but the way things are going on the surface right now, it might seem as if we're not meant to be... hell, we might not even be talking to each other or you may not even know I exist right now! But as soon as the divine gives me the green light, I'll be coming running toward you to claim you all for myself." ✨

If you'd like to know more about your person's thoughts for you, you can book a reading with me! You can find the details here :]

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chaaistained · 3 days ago

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☕︎ my better cr; intro •°

🗝️ you’ve unlocked the recipe to my better cr ≈

name : ℳ

age (when i shift) : 17/18 — i’m planning to either shift to dec 2021 or aug 2022 , wtv my subconscious chooses

occupation : university student — double degree in law and arts, majoring in media law and craft of writing & literature, respectively

+ part time tutor for english and maths, at the same private tutoring company i went to in high school

+ (eventually) part time stock acquisition and youth advertiser at a telecommunications company near my campus which is technically a nepo hire bcs my aunt works there

+ (eventually) paid internship at the australian taxation office for the study of torts and contracts and even tho i got in genuinely bcs of my marks and my interview it also feels a little nepo bcs another aunt (a family friend) also works here.. anyway

side hobbies/hustles : blogger (tumblrina in every reality if i can help it) , tiktok + youtube cover channel with two of my high school friends , fic author (ao3 curse does NOT exist here come at me) , occasional columnist for my uni’s student newsletter

my s/o : childhood family friend — lost contact and reunited ten years later — not revealing his name apart from the first letter bcs . he’s real .. anyway it’s 𝒜

౨ৎ meet ℳ

a sun kissed cinnamon bun personified — she is the smile that blossoms between warm cheeks during the burn of a sunrise ≈

in this dr i don’t change my name, and for that reason i’ll stick to the first letter (just like my pinned post) which is ℳ.

i’m nothing more than a normal girl, waking up each day already tired but willing myself to either go to uni or work, staying up late to catch up on the hours i spend doing other things, i have a closet full of clothes and yet i have nothing to wear, i have three of the same shades of lip gloss but they’re all from different brands so ofcs they’re not the same, i just bought a new journal but i’m yet to finish the one i got four years ago, i have ink stains on the tips of my fingers and chai stains on the pages edge of the novel i’m currently reading.

i just take every day like a new pot of tea leaves, waiting to be steeped to perfection.

𓈒⠀𓂃⠀⠀˖⠀𓇬⠀˖⠀⠀𓂃⠀𓈒

౨ৎ the metamorphosis

with frayed edges and tear stained cheeks, she undid the binds of a life once lived, a life once loved, finding the holes to be too much to bear in the everlasting winter of the cold reality that was thrust upon her, opting to take the needle and thread between her own fingers and stitch up the seams, to reinforce the realm of her existence into one that can hold her hand rather than hold her down

quite often i approach the concept of reinvention with a quivering hand, unable to part ways from the comfort — or perhaps the codependency — of that familiarity.

but eventually i took a step back and realised, there is no shame in finding freedom in what already feels right . after all, our souls are not dependant on this realm or this body, our consciousness is an ever expanding universe on its own, and our power to wield it is something that we have grown to understand and control in a way that allows us to live the lives we truly desire.. that’s all that this dr represents for me.

a life that i truly desire.

i’m not that different here, i have the same name, the same birthday, the same family. but it would be a lie to say everything stays the same.

i do admit to changing my appearance a bit, i’m nothing if not a perfectionist and whilst i do think my features have potential, i actually reach said potential in this reality. my upbringing has been revitalised to be something that enriched me rather than keeping me sheltered. my parental unit is less overbearing and more understanding, my brother is less of a jerk and more of a friend, my family relationships are less immature and more genuine.

i revise my failures in education, i revise my anxieties around success and the fear of that success being unreachable, i revise my health, my athleticism, my willpower and the general energy i have throughout the day to achieve everything that i wish to accomplish, everything that i could not bring myself to take a step towards in my previous reality.

my passions aren’t shamed here, they are encouraged. not just with the wary caution of a simple hobby but rather as an actual proper lifestyle, a feasible choice to make for a career, a skill that is supported as something from which i can make a name for myself.

and in this growth, in this metamorphosis, i find stability and comfort in not just my family but also my friends — people that i lost contact with, people that i drifted away from, people that i couldn’t bring myself to keep close because of the shame in my own progression or lack thereof — i’m not an aspect of shame, i never was, i know what i deserve and what i’m capable of and in this reality, i am all those things.

that’s why this is home, even after i break out of the cocoon and open my eyes in a world that’s familiar, it will also be different, because i’ll be different — no longer experiencing the slow sluggish state of what once was, for i now have a marvellous symmetry of splendour that holds me high, the equilibrium of my reality, where the scales finally tipped in my favour, levelling out to be amiably sound, with every flap of a butterfly’s wing.

𓈒⠀𓂃⠀⠀˖⠀𓇬⠀˖⠀⠀𓂃⠀𓈒

౨ৎ sugar heart cookies

it’s an inexplicable pull, an intangible tug on the heartstrings, a firm grip, a gentle ache, a deep longing. you can’t help but feel that there is something more out there for you, that there is someone more. someone that feels less like a piece and more like a whole person. someone who won’t complete you, but will help you complete yourself. two halves of a heart leaves you vulnerable when you’re apart, but when it’s two hearts beating alongside each other, the only thing left is to hold onto you

he sat beside me in his mother’s car. we were six (me) and eight (him). he sat in the drivers seat while his mother went inside the house to pick up a few things before taking the three of us (his little sister sat in the back) to a gathering of family friends.

his mother had bought us britannia little hearts. i can still remember the minuscule sugar crystals stuck to the tips of my small fingers while i dove inside the aluminium cover every few seconds to reach for the next tiny biscuit.

he asked me where i was that day — i’d stayed home from school because i felt unwell — when i told him, his first reaction was to nag me : “you know, if you’re sick, you shouldn’t be eating these. this is pure sugar.”

“yeah but i don’t want to listen to you!” — i was .. never really good at listening to people, especially not cute boys who were a little older than me.

he always seemed a bit uptight, but i guess i forgot how much he cared. because i can’t remember what happened two years later, during my last day in my old school. i remember crying, and i remember being comforted by people. but i guess i forgot that one of those people was him. i guess i forgot that he told me “it’ll be alright. i’m sure we’ll see each other again someday.”

it took us ten years but we got there.

this time, he was upstairs, in the house that was hosting a dinner among friends. i was distracted by my brother’s antics, one foot inside the threshold past the door and one foot on the pavement outside. with a flick of my head, my gaze turned up, up past the stairs in front of the door, up to the railing on the second level, a lookout point for the entrance.

he was leaning against the railing, blue button up shirt tucked into his black jeans, scrolling aimlessly on his phone, taking a quick glance to his side before doing a double take.

the silence felt like the calm before a pattering evening of rainfall, where you can feel the change in your future from the way the air seems electrified, from the way the clouds seems to churn around each other, like they’re brewing together, ready to erupt and explode into thunder, like the way you can hear your heartbeat in your ears.

he seemed familiar, he seemed important, he seemed to be everything i could ever ask for and i didn’t know why the sirens were singing in my skull but i knew in my gut he was meant to be important to me. i knew he was meant to be somebody.

it took me a second to look away, but that entire night, and every night that followed, and every day that came along with it, i can’t ever forget the sugar crystal glimmers of light in his eyes. and for every moment to come, i’ll hold the little heart biscuits of our love in the palm of my hands, because i’m not someone who listens to people very well, i don’t care if i’m not allowed, i want them . i want him.

don’t swallow the tea leaves ! for they leave you a message 🍂

this dr is very near and dear to my heart and i can’t even begin to put everything i wanna say about it into one post so .. there will be more abt this dr

it’s literally home. it’s my life.

i’m so grateful for it xx

chaai brews; tea assortments — dr archive

2025 © chaaistained

#by chaaistained #chaai for : 𝒜 ৻ꪆ #chaai channels ; ℳ༄#dividers from: saradika-graphics & issysh3ll #pngs by me !!#better cr #better cr dr #reality shifting #reality shifter #manifestation #permashifting #permashift #permashifter #dr intro #better cr intro

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insidekatmind · 2 days ago

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Consolation-Virgil Van Dijk

wearning: +18,smut.

Request: yes!

It’s late in the evening, and you’re comfortably seated on your couch, wrapped in a blanket with a cup of hot tea in your hands. You watched the match on TV: a tough loss, with mistakes rarely seen from such a strong team. You know Virgil is the type to carry everything on his shoulders, and you can’t stop thinking about how he might be feeling right now.

A knock at the door pulls you from your thoughts. You’re not expecting anyone, but when you open the door, there’s Virgil, standing in front of you. He’s still in his tracksuit, hood pulled up like he’s trying to hide from the world. His face, though, gives him away: it’s marked by exhaustion and frustration.

“Can I come in?” he asks in a quiet voice.

“Virgil, of course, come in,” you reply, stepping aside to let him in. You close the door behind him and watch as he pulls down his hood, revealing a tense expression and eyes that avoid meeting yours.

“Sorry for showing up so late,” he says, running a hand over his face. “I didn’t know where else to go.”

“You don’t have to apologize,” you say, guiding him to the couch. “You know you’re always welcome here. Do you want something? Tea, coffee…?”

He shakes his head, sinking heavily onto the couch. “No, thanks. I don’t think I could get anything down right now.”

You sit beside him, giving him space to speak. You know Virgil isn’t the type to open up immediately, but it’s clear he’s wrestling with something big. After a long silence, he finally breaks it.

“It was my fault, y/N,” he says, staring at the floor. “That missed marking… that goal… I can’t stop thinking about it. I let the team down, the fans… everyone.”

“Virgil, listen,” you begin gently, “one lost match doesn’t define who you are—either as a leader or as a player. You’re one of the best in the world, and you know that. But even the best have off nights.”

“It’s not just that,” he counters, clenching his fists on his knees. “I’m supposed to be the anchor, the one everyone else can rely on. And instead… instead, I feel like I’m sinking. It’s frustrating, y/N. I don’t know how to pull myself out of this.”

You look at him, choosing your words carefully. “Virgil, being a leader doesn’t mean never making mistakes. It means showing others how to handle those mistakes. Your team doesn’t need you to be perfect. They need you to be human, to fight to get better.”

He lifts his gaze, finally meeting your eyes. “But it’s so hard… I feel like I’m letting everyone down, and it’s eating me up inside.”

You lean in slightly, placing a reassuring hand on his shoulder. “What really matters is how you respond to this feeling. No one can be perfect, Virgil, but you’ve already shown you can overcome challenges. This is just another one, and I know you’ll get through it.”

Virgil remains silent for a moment, then nods slowly. “Maybe you’re right,” he says with a small sigh. “I need to stop focusing only on what went wrong and think about what I can do to improve. But… it’s easier said than done.”

“That’s why I’m here,” you reply with a reassuring smile. “You don’t have to face this alone. Whatever you need, you know you can count on me.”

He offers a faint smile, the first you’ve seen since he arrived. “Thanks, y/N. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

Virgil gently takes your wrist and pulls you to straddle him.You stumble slightly as he pulls you onto him, your thighs resting beside his lap. You look down at him, your heart beating faster now. He looks up at you with an intensity in his eyes that you’ve seldom seen before. He keeps your wrist in his grasp, his fingers wrapped around it almost tenderly, yet with a hint of desire.

You can feel the warmth of his body against yours as he pulls you closer, his free hand coming to rest on your thigh. He watches you silently, his eyes roaming over your face. You take a breath, trying to steady your racing heart. “Virgil…?” you murmur, questioning, uncertain about the situation unfolding.

He doesn’t answer immediately, his gaze holding you captive. There’s a vulnerability in his eyes, something you rarely see from the normally strong and confident man. His thumb begins tracing slow circles over your thigh, the touch sending shivers up your spine. After what feels like an eternity, he finally speaks, his voice low and a bit hoarse. “I needed this,” he whispers, his hand on your wrist squeezing gently.

You nod softly, hugging him, stroking his hair.Virgil returns your embrace, his arms encircling you, pulling you flush against him. His head dips slightly, his face burying into your chest, his breath warm against your skin. For a moment, he just holds you, his heart beating against your chest, his fingers tracing light patterns over your back.

This tender version of Virgil, all vulnerability and gentleness, melts your heart. You run your fingers through his hair, your touch soft and soothing. You can feel the tension in him slowly start to ease away as he clings to you, seeking comfort in your presence.

After some time, he pulls back slightly, his forehead resting against yours. His eyes are closed, and he looks weary, but his expression is less troubled than it was when he arrived. “Y/N…” he begins softly, his voice barely above a whisper. “I don’t know how you do it, but being here with you… it helps. Even on nights like tonight.”

"Do you want to spend the night here?" You ask softly, caressing his cheeks.He looks at you for a moment, his gaze searching your face as if to gauge whether you truly mean your offer. Then, a small nod of his head answers your question. "Please," he murmurs, his hand on your thigh squeezing again. "I don't want to be alone tonight."

You nod and kiss his forehead softly, then his nose, and then his cheeks.He watches you intently as you press soft kisses to his forehead, his nose, and his cheeks. A soft sigh escapes his lips, his eyes never leaving your face. His grip on your thigh tightens slightly, as if he's afraid you'll disappear if he let go for even a moment. Each kiss seems to soothe him further, the stress lines around his eyes smoothing out.

The silence in the room feels heavy yet peaceful at the same time. The only sound is your soft breathing and the occasional sigh from him as you continue to pepper his face with gentle kisses. He lifts his hand from your thigh, his fingers tracing your jawline tenderly, before his thumb brushes across your bottom lip. He seems to have calmed down completely now, all the earlier turmoil replaced by a quiet vulnerability.

"Y/N..." he murmurs again, his voice barely above a whisper, "I..." He trails off, his eyes filled with an emotion you can't quite name. He looks like he wants to say something important, but the right words don't seem to come. The atmosphere in the room is thick with unspoken words and untold feelings.

You can sense that there's more he wants to say, more that he's feeling, but it's like a dam holding back a flood of emotions. His hand, still on your jaw, moves to cup the back of your neck, gently pulling you closer. His eyes seem to be searching your face for something, a silent question in the depths of their blue.

The closeness between you is almost tangible now. You're so close that you can feel his breath against your skin, his body against yours. The air feels charged with unspoken tension, the space between you filled with a heady mixture of desire and something else, something deeper and more complex. He keeps touching you, his fingertips tracing over your skin as if he's committing you to memory.

Finally, he speaks again, breaking the silence that hangs between you. His voice is deeper than usual, and raw with emotion. "I need you," he murmurs, his fingers splaying against the nape of your neck. "More than I need anything right now... I just... I need you."

You nod and kiss him softly.As your lips meet his, he responds almost instantly, pressing against you with a hunger that you haven't felt from him before. He pulls you closer, his fingers tangling in your hair. The kiss deepens, his tongue brushing against your lips, seeking entry. He kisses you like a drowning man gasping for air, as if he's pouring all his unspoken feelings into that one action.

His arms wrap around you, pulling you even closer. You feel the heat of his body against yours, the strength of his embrace. There's an urgency in his kiss, a desperate need he's trying to convey. His hands roam over your body, touching, caressing, as if he's trying to assure himself that you're really there, really with him.

He breaks the kiss, just for a moment, to look at you. His eyes are darker than before, filled with a storm of emotions. He's breathing heavily, his chest rising and falling rapidly. "Y/N..." he whispers, his voice hoarse and raw with desire. "Stay with me tonight. Please... just stay."There's a vulnerability in his plea that cuts right to your heart. He needs you, not just now, but deeper, more permanently. He isn't just asking for comfort or physical connection; he's asking for something more substantial, a lifeline to hold onto amidst his storm of insecurities and fears.

You nod, your heart overflowing with affection for this man, who stands so strong in the face of the world, yet crumbles when alone. "I'll stay," you assure him, your voice soft but firm. "As long as you need me to, I'm not going anywhere."

You kiss him with more passion.The passion in your kiss stokes the fire that's been steadily building between you. He reacts instantly, the kiss becoming more intense, more desperate. He pulls you flush against him, his hands roaming over your body, seeking skin to touch, flesh to touch.There's a hunger in the way he kisses you, an intensity that borders on frantic. His tongue tangles with yours, his hands gripping your hips, pulling you even closer.

You gently pulled away to take off your shirt and then reattached your lips to his.His eyes follow your movements as you lift your shirt over your head, baring your skin to him. For a moment he just stares, his eyes raking over your exposed flesh, his gaze hungry and appreciative.As you return to his lips, he responds with a deep, guttural moan. His hands go to your waist, sliding over your bare skin, pulling you flush against him. He kisses you more fiercely now, his tongue delving deeper, his body pressing harder against yours.

He gently laid you down on the couch and took off the rest of your clothes and undressed himself too.As he moves over you, his naked body pressed against yours, you can feel the heat coming off him, his skin hot and smooth. He looks down at you, his eyes dark and heavy with desire. His hands rest on either side of your head, bracing his weight on strong arms, trapping you beneath him.

As he moves over you, his naked body pressed against yours, you can feel the heat coming off him, his skin hot and smooth. He looks down at you, his eyes dark and heavy with desire. His hands rest on either side of your head, bracing his weight on strong arms, trapping you beneath him.

In one sharp thrust he entered you making both of you moan into the kiss.You arch against him as he fills you, a sharp gasp escaping your lips. He moans into the kiss, his body shaking with restrained desire. He stays still for a moment, letting you adjust to his size, his hands clenching the fabric of the couch on either side of your head.

“Babe, you're squeezing my cock so good,” he murmurs, moaning, and begins to move quickly. His thrusts were not gentle at all. You could feel inch by inch going in and out.He mouths at your neck, his lips tracing a path from jawline to collarbone. His breath is hot against your skin, his fingers digging into the flesh of your hips, holding you steady as he sets the pace.

You moan feeling his thrusts getting harder and harder. "Virgil I'm close" you murmur nibbling his neck."I know," he rasps, his voice strained with the effort it's taking to hold back. "Just... hold on a bit longer, please..." His body is tense above you, muscles taut as he tries to maintain his control, not wanting this to end too soon.

He picks up the pace suddenly, his thrusts becoming faster, more urgent. His lips are back at your neck, his teeth scraping against your skin, leaving a trail of fire in their wake. "I can't hold back much longer," he mutters, his words barely decipherable between the gasps and moans.

You can feel the edge approaching, your body trembling, your hands clawing at his back, seeking an anchor in this storm of sensations. "Virgil, I..." you start to say, but your words fade into a guttural moan as he hits a sensitive spot.

"I know," he gasps, his voice hoarse. "Me too." He's struggling to hold back, the need to let go warring with his desire to prolong this moment. His hips pound against yours, his fingers gripping your hips almost to the point of pain, holding you steady as he reaches the limit

"I need..." he moans, the word hanging in the air, half-formulated. He doesn't know what he needs; only that he wants more, more of you, more of this, more of the pleasure that's threatening to consume him altogether.

He pulls out of you and then turns you on all fours and enters you again.He's behind you suddenly, his body pressed against your back, his arms wrapping around your waist. His breath is hot on your neck, his chest rising and falling rapidly. He waits for a moment, letting you adjust to the new position, his breath coming in ragged gasps against your ear.

“fuck” you moan feeling his thrusts get even harder. Virgil grabs a lock of your hair and pulls it making you arch and moan.

"Yeah?" He asks, his voice rough and low, the sound sending shivers down your spine. His grip on your hair is tight, his hand keeping your head tilted back, exposing the vulnerable line of your neck. “You like that, huh?”

“yes” you moan resting your head on his shoulders as Virgil continued to thrust harder. "very much".He chuckles breathlessly, the sound more a exhalation than a laugh. "I thought you would," he murmurs, his lips brushing against your ear. "You make the best sounds when I pull your hair like this."

You moan feeling his thrusts get stronger. One push in particular had you bent back onto the couch.He follows the motion, the force of his thrust pressing you down into the couch. Your body is arched, your back bowing under the combined weight of his body and the intensity of his movements. You can hear him panting, his breath hot against your neck, his hands roaming over your flesh, seeking to draw out more.

"God, you look beautiful like this," he mutters, his voice rough and gravelly with desire. "Bent over for me like this."Virgil slaps your ass and goes faster.

His hands are everywhere, roaming freely over your flesh, seeking to touch every inch of you. His lips are back on your throat, his teeth nipping at the sensitive skin there, leaving a trail of little bite marks in their wake.

“Virgil” you scream loudly moaning.He groans against your neck, your cry of pleasure going straight to his stomach. "Yeah," he mutters, his voice hoarse and raw. "Say my name again. I love hearing you say my name like that."

He moves faster, his hips slamming into you with every stroke, his pace picking up steadily. "Again," he gasps, his teeth scraping against the sensitive skin of your shoulder. "Say my name."

“Virgil” you moan again.He shudders behind you, the sound of his name on your lips sending a jolt through him. "Again," he demands, his breath coming in ragged gasps as he moves faster. "Say it again. I want to hear you."

You repeat his name, the word becoming a litany, a prayer on your lips as you're pushed closer and closer to the edge. His grip on you tightens, his fingers digging into your flesh as he urges you on.

“That’s it," he growls, his voice hoarse. "Just like that. You’re so close, I can tell. I can feel it. Come on, say my name again. Let me hear you say it one more time."His words are like a drug, driving you higher, higher until you feel like you’re going to burst. You repeat his name again, the syllables almost lost in the litany of moans and gasps that fill the air.

as you fall over the edge, your body spasming around him, a cry of pleasure torn from your throat. Behind you he groans, the sound guttural and primal. He follows you over the edge, his body trembling against yours as he comes, your name falling from his lips in a shuddering gasp. For a moment there's only the sound of labored breathing, the aftermath of pleasure leaving you both boneless and weary. He gathers you in his arms, pulling you down with him as he collapses back onto the couch, holding you close against his chest.

"That was..." he starts, his voice thick with emotion. He trails off, unable to articulate the maelstrom of feelings coursing through him. "That was... incredible."

You nod, your legs shaking with pleasure. You rest on his chest as you recover from your climax.He holds you against him, his strong arms encircling you like a protective cocoon. He drops a kiss on the top of your head, his fingers tracing lazy patterns on your skin. "You okay?" he asks quietly, the concern in his voice belied by the possessive way he's holding onto you.

You nod again, not quite trusting yourself to speak yet. Your body is still quivering with aftershocks, your mind a delightful buzz. You nuzzle against his chest, inhaling the scent of him, letting his presence ground you.

He responds instinctively, his hold on you tightening almost reflexively, as if afraid you might disappear if he lets go. "Good," he murmurs, the relief in his voice palpable. "I was worried I might've been too... rough."

"No," you find your voice at last, though it comes out as a gravelly whisper rather than your usual tone. "It was... perfect. I don't think I can move."Virgil chuckles softly, the sound rumbling through his chest. "Not surprised," he says, the pride in his voice evident. "I kinda went a bit... uh... overboard, huh?"

You give a weak nod, still feeling like your bones have turned to jello. "Just a bit," you manage to reply, a hint of a laugh in your voice.He tightens his hold on you just a fraction more, a possessive gesture that you don't mind at all. "Well, I'm not sorry," he says, sounding very much unapologetic. "You were making the most delightful sounds. Couldn't help myself."

"I have no complaints," you murmur, your eyes drifting closed. You can feel his heart beating under your cheek, the steady thump-thump like a soothing lullaby. You're tired, boneless, satisfied to the point of exhaustion, and very much not ready to move yet.

He seems to sense this and relaxes under you, his hand continuing that soothing motion on your back. "Get some rest," he whispers, his voice low and soothing. He doesn't seem in any hurry to move either, his body warm and solid beneath you.

You hum a wordless assent, already drifting towards sleep. The steady rhythm of his breathing, the reassuring presence of his body, the exhaustion of your recent activities all combining to pull you inexorably into unconsciousness."Sweet dreams," he murmurs, his voice a quiet whisper. You feel a soft kiss on the top of your head, his lips gentle and tender against your hair.

You murmur something inarticulate, too far gone to form actual words. The last thing you feel before sleep claims you is the steady rhythm of his heartbeat beneath your ear, a soothing thrum that lulls you into darkness.

#virgil van dijk #virgil van dijk smut #liverpool fc #footballer fanfic #football fic #football fanfic #football fluff #football x you #football x y/n #football x oc #football x reader #footballer x y/n #footballer x you #footballer x reader

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trikruismybitch · 2 days ago

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Never meant...

Pairings: Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader, Implied Natasha Romanoff x Maria Hill

Warnings: kinda cheating, communication? Sad just very sad lots of angst no happy endings

Summary: Natasha's been distant and you just want to know if she's okay

"Whats been going on with you?" Y/n questions softly "You've been acting distant and weird lately, is everything okay my love?" you say as you walk up to Nat touching her arm lovingly

"Yeah baby i'm fine" she gives you a smile but it strained and her tone is dismissive

You internally sigh not wanting to cause any problems but the growing distance between you guys lately has been bothering you

"I know you're not fine Nat" you look into her eyes "I can feel that you aren't 'fine' and honestly lately i've been feeling like we aren't 'fine'." You stop rubbing her arm with your thumb but you stay close still "I don't want this to be a fight but i can tell somethings genuinely wrong and i need you to talk to me about it. I'm here for you, okay baby? Whatever's going on we'll get through this together." You speak in a gentle and understanding tone. You love her so fucking much and it kills you that she's not communicating with you.

Natasha looks at you and you stare back. You start to get a nervous pit in your stomach at the way she's staring at you. Usually theres a softness to the look in her eyes but right now it feels like she's looking right past you and it's unsettling.

"Maria kissed me a month ago," Natasha says. Theres a pause before she admits, "and i liked it. I wanted her."

You take a step back as if you were physically pushed "What?" Your mind starts racing and your hearts starts beating rapidly "What are you trying to say?"

Natasha shakes her head "I pushed her away after a second, i swear! I've felt so guilty about it since it happened...and It took me awhile to admit to myself that I'm attracted to her."

Natasha's eyes pour deeply into your soul. Her unwavering gaze is met by yours, eyes slowly blinking, praying, hoping that this is a cruel dream. Your skin itches, your body feels hot.

"I-i don't know what to say..." You whisper out taking a few steps back leaning on the kitchen counter hands resting behind you "I don't know how to feel right now. I'm confused, do you have feelings for her?"

"No! I don't! I love you." Natasha waves her hands in front of herself "I just think...feel sexually attracted to her? She's funny and she makes me laugh, she's like a breath of fresh air, you know?"

You just stare at her not believing she had the balls to say that to your face, "I need to go." you mumble and start looking around for your keys. Fuck you really wish you were more organized and now its biting you in the ass.

"Y/n, baby" Natasha keeps calling out as you rummage through all the places you might've put your keys. You look at the key hook and zero in on Natasha's car keys. Natasha follows your gaze and rushes to grab the keys before you get there, "Y/n wait! What are you doing? Where are you trying to go?"

You snap "I don't know Natasha!" You yell throwing your hands up and looking around. Your eyes start to burn wanting to cry "I just know that I don't want to be around you right now. I need time to process what you've said and then we can talk okay? So please just hand me the damn keys!" you cry out frustratingly. You hold your hand out for the keys, waiting.

"I want to talk now." Natasha furrows her brows "I came to you wanting to talk this through-"

"You didn't come to me!" You point to your chest "I had to push it out of you Nat! I always do!" You wave your hands around wildly, "Whenever you're upset or somethings bothering you, you become distant and unresponsive to my attempts to engage with you. Then when i ask if you're okay- and big surprise-you lie! I had to push this out of you Natasha!" You shake your head angrily, "So do not say that 'you want to talk this through'" you use air quotes when you say that, "because you NEVER DO! I do! I'm patient and understanding with you...and all you do is lie to me in return!" You sigh out tiredly "So, please respect my wishes and let me leave." You outstretch your arm for the keys

"No, I'm sorry okay" Nat tries to take a step toward you but you shake your head as you drop your hand "I-i've been feeling so guilty about this, thats why i've been distant. I didn't want to admit...I wasn't fully upset about the kiss. And I was so angry at myself for liking it and even if i didn't kiss her back I felt like I betrayed you. I just want to fix this." She's on the verge of tears clutching the keys tightly in her hand. She doesn't want to lose you.

You shake your head, again, and rub your eyes with your hands, "I don't understand how you expect me to fix something, I didn't even know was broken in the first place Natasha" You swallow as you take a deep breathe "You're basically saying you want to fuck someone else because your tired of our relationship, how am I supposed to feel about that? Huh? All this shit is thrown at me, I know we weren't 100% but I thought we were happy, that you were happy with us."

"I love you so fucking much. I love our life together and I would never" she enunciates 'never', "throw it away to sleep with someone else" she speaks vehemently before softening her tone "I'm telling you because I know I need to be honest with you about this. You think I want to feel this way about someone else? You mean the world to me Y/n and I don't want anything to jeopardize that."

You close your eyes. Despite everything she said and how much it hurt you, a part of you understands where she's coming from, and even with everything your heart still burns for her.

You open your eyes and you try to smile but it comes out strained "I know. I love you too...but I can't promise you that what you said isn't going to affect our relationship. I appreciate the transparency but I need time Nat...please give me the keys." You ask politely

Natasha's lip quivers as she slowly gives you the keys "Where will you go?" She questions

"I don't know right now, I'll let you know later." You go to walk past her but she softly grabs your arm when you've become parallel with her.

She gives your cheek a soft kiss, "I love you." she presses her forehead against your right cheek, breathing you in before you leave. You feel her tears fall and your heart pangs sadly in your chest at the women you love, so you briefly lean against her "I love you too" you gently pry your hand from her grasp and then you leave.

Natasha watches you go. She watched as the door is slowly shut. She hears as the roar of her cars engine takes whats left of her heart. She never meant for this to happen. She never meant to hurt you. And she never meant for you to leave.

an: not proofread & this has been in the drafts for awhile. a little something to read while you wait for "Did i cross the line" part 3 👀

#natasha romanoff angst #natasha romanoff x fem!reader #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff fic #reader insert #angst #marvel #black widow x fem!reader #black widow x y/n #trikruwrites

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snowysosturn · 2 days ago

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Fire & Desire - Matt Sturniolo Part 9

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9

Pairing: Y/n x Matt Sturniolo

Summary: Y/n has always clashed with Matt. Despite working for Chris’s clothing brand and being close with Nick, her relationship with Matt has always been tense at best. While being forced to be around each other more, their animosity turns into something deeper. Can they overcome their differences, or will their fiery emotions tear them apart?

Warnings: MDNI, angst, tension, mentions of drinking and being hungover

I glance at the bouquet one last time, the petals now frayed with bits of trash throughout it. With a sigh, I place it gently back in the bin. Keeping it would feel.. strange. Too much. But the card.. that’s something I can’t seem to leave behind. I place it back in the envelope and slip it into my pocket before picking up the box I’d left on the floor and putting it in the trash before heading back inside.

My mind is elsewhere as I make my way to Chris’s room. I knew I needed to get the company card to get Chris a new phone, I’ll have to order it today to make sure its here before he heads to Hawaii.

I push open the door and see Nate falling asleep in Chris' bed. He looks up as I step inside.

“Hey” I whisper, leaning against the doorframe. “I’m looking for the company card. Have you seen it? He usually keeps it on the desk”

Nate furrows his brows and shakes his head. “I haven’t seen it. You’re right though they all usually leave their things on their desk, I didn't see it though.”

“Exactly” I mutter, scanning the desk for any signs of the card. Nothing.

“Maybe it’s in Matt’s room” Nate suggests with a shrug, trying to go back to the sleep I just brought him out of.

I exhale sharply, already feeling the tension creeping in. “Of course it is” I mumble, more to myself than to him. “Thanks, Nate.”

Leaving Chris’s room, I climb the stairs, my footsteps heavier now. The closer I get to Matt’s room, the more I debate what to do. It’s not like I haven’t been in there before, but I still feel like I'm intruding, it was.. complicated.

I stop in front of his door, my hand hesitating on the handle. Taking a breath, I tell myself to stop overthinking. It’s just a debit card. Get in, grab it, and get out.

I push open Matt’s door cautiously, the slight creak of the hinges sounding louder than it should in the stillness. I make my way over to his desk in the corner of the room and scan over it. No card there either. Where could Chris have put this?

My eyes wander around his room. Then I notice it. Perched on his bedside locker, standing upright and slightly tilted as if placed deliberately, is the thank you card I gave him.

It oddly makes my heart skip a beat.

He kept it? Not only that, but he put it on display? I stare at the card, feeling a mix of emotions swirl in my chest. It must mean something to him, right? I gave it to him on a whim, thinking he’d either forget about it or toss it in the trash without a second thought. But here it is, sitting there like it’s important.

Next to the card is a silver metallic bag. It catches the light, sleek and reflective, and my curiosity flares. A gift bag? Then I notice other memorabilia and cards.. Maybe that’s just where he keeps things people give him? For a moment, I picture him tossing everything he’s been handed into one spot without a second glance. The realization makes me pause, a wave of doubt creeping in. What am I still doing in here? I shouldn’t be snooping around, especially not in Matt’s room. It feels invasive, like I’ve crossed an invisible line, yet I can’t seem to stop myself.

My gaze flicks back to the thank you card, and for a brief second, I remember those rare moments when Matt wasn’t a complete asshole, when he’d let his guard down and show an ounce of kindness. Those glimpses of him were few and far between, but real. It made me curious if there was more to him, buried beneath the layers of anger and arrogance.

I clutch the envelope from the flowers in my hand tightly, feeling its edges dig into my palm. It suddenly feels heavy, like it’s holding more meaning than it should. What does it all mean? I shake my head, snapping myself out of it. This is too much. Too personal. I need to leave before I lose myself in this train of thought. I turn on my heel, heading back to the door, but my feet feel heavier with every step, like I’m leaving something unresolved behind.

I sit on the couch in the living room, I put the small envelope in my pocket and take out my phone. My thoughts spiral as I decide to scroll through the thread of messages Matt and I exchanged earlier. Did I really want to text him for answers? Our last messages to each other were.. tense, to say the least. His frosty replies and my final comment about it being the “last time” we’d texted each other still lingered in the back of my mind.

Why am I even considering this?

Wait, I actually need to text him again. My mind is getting so caught up in hidden meanings I’m forgetting what I actually have to do. Chris wasn’t reachable, and Matt was the closest connection I had. I sighed, composing myself as I typed out a message:

"Can you tell Chris the business card isn’t in his room?"

I hit send and waited, the seconds feeling like minutes. A response popped up almost immediately:

Matt: "Thought you weren’t going to text me again."

I rolled my eyes so hard I thought they’d get stuck. Of course, he couldn’t resist. I typed back, my fingers moving quickly:

"I don’t have a choice when you’re my communication with Chris."

I pull out the envelope from my pocket to read the card again, the words on it now etched in my mind. Y/n, I’m sorry for last night. I went too far, and you didn’t deserve that. The difference between his words to me at times was crazy. There’s something about the simplicity of the note, paired with the effort it must’ve taken to even organise it, that makes me pause. I wanted to bring it up to him. What had changed between the moment he decided to buy those flowers and when they ended up in the trash?

Maybe it was an accident? The thought feels washy, but I cling to it.

Before I can second guess myself, I snap a picture of the card, my hand shaking just enough to blur the first attempt. I steady myself, retake it, and attach the image to a new message. My fingers hesitate on the keyboard, then type:

"Apology accepted."

I press send before I can change my mind. The message bubbles with the photo of the card and those two simple words feel heavy in my chest as I sit back and wait for a response. My phone remains silent, the screen mocking me with its lack of activity.

It’s in that quiet moment that Nick’s voice cuts through my thoughts, yelling my name from somewhere upstairs.

I sigh, putting my phone in my pocket. Whatever Matt’s response might be, it will have to wait.

I hear Nick shouting my name from his room, his voice brimming with excitement. “Y/n! Come here! I’ve good news!”

Curious, I quicken my pace and climb up the stairs and into his room. He’s sitting on his bed, laptop in lap, grinning like a kid with a secret he can’t wait to spill. His enthusiasm is contagious, but I still raise an eyebrow. “What’s going on?” I ask, crossing my arms with a small smile.

“I’ve got a surprise for you.”

I laugh, already skeptical. “What kind of surprise?”

“A fun one!” he teases, leaning back dramatically.

“Okay, spill it, Nick.”

“You’re coming to Hawaii with us!”

I blink at him, waiting for the punchline, but it doesn’t come. “What?” I finally manage to say, my voice in disbelief.

“You heard me” he says, beaming. “I just bought a plane ticket for you. You’re staying in the same villa with us. It’s all set.”

For a moment, I just stare at him, trying to figure out if he’s pulling some elaborate prank. “Are you serious?”

“Dead” he replies, his grin never faltering. “You deserve this.”

I laugh nervously, shaking my head. “Nick, you’re messing with me. There’s no way.”

“I’m not messing with you!” he insists, raising his hands in mock surrender. “I booked it already. Ask Chris if you don’t believe me. I brought it up to him the same day he invited Nate and he immediately agreed.”

The sincerity in his voice starts to sink in, and my disbelief slowly gives way to shock. “Wait.. you and Chris talked about this?”

“Yeah” Nick says, his tone softening. “Look, we both know you’ve been through a lot lately. Between the apartment, Ethan.. well, life in general, you deserve a break. You’ve been working so hard for Chris too, so we figured, why not?”

I take a step back, the weight of his words hitting me. “Nick, that’s.. that’s so nice of you. You didn’t have to do that.”

“I know I didn’t have to” he says, shrugging like it’s no big deal. “But I wanted to. You need this, Y/n. And honestly, it wouldn’t feel right going without you.”

I feel a lump forming in my throat, a mix of gratitude and shock making it hard to speak. “I don’t even know what to say. Thank you, Nick. Seriously.”

“Don’t thank me yet!” he says with a laugh. “Wait until we’re sipping cocktails on the beach.”

I laugh with him, shaking my head in disbelief. I take a deep breath, trying to process everything. A trip to Hawaii? It feels surreal, and the fact that they thought of me, that they wanted to include me, it’s overwhelming in the best way. I just wasn't sure everyone on the trip feels that way.

“Okay, okay. But, uh.. I’m going to need clothes. And a bigger suitcase, considering I don’t have much anymore. I’m practically down to my last jumper already.”

Nick smirks, getting up from his bed and walking to his closet. “I was hoping you’d say that. Shopping trip tomorrow? My treat.”

“Nick, you really don’t have to do that-”

He cuts me off, holding up a hand as he pulls a jumper out from his closet. “Oh, I absolutely do. You’re going to Hawaii with me, and there’s no way I’m letting you go with just whatever’s left from the wreckage of Hurricane Ethan. You need new outfits, bikinis, something cute for dinners, sandals, sunglasses. Everything. Also, take this for the minute so you have an extra jumper.” He says, passing me a yellow Ralph Lauren jumper.

I blink at him, both surprised and slightly overwhelmed by his enthusiasm. “Nick, I can’t let you spend all that money on me.”

“You’re not ‘letting’ me do anything” he says, rolling his eyes. “I’ve already decided. Besides, think of it as a business expense.” Giving me a smirk.

I narrow my eyes at him. “A business expense?”

“Yeah! You’re part of the Fresh Love family, right? Consider it an investment. Plus I have the company card right now” He winks, clearly proud of his reasoning.

My mouth drops. “Oh my god you had it all this time!” I laugh.

“Yeah I ordered Chris a new phone too, he should be grateful.” He says raising his eyebrows. “And let’s be real, you deserve it. You’ve been working nonstop for weeks, and I don’t think you’ve treated yourself to anything in forever. So tomorrow, we’re hitting the mall. Clothes, a suitcase, anything else you need, we’re getting it.”

I laugh, shaking my head. “Okay, fine. But promise me you won’t go overboard.”

“We’ll see” he says with a mischievous grin. “Tomorrow, 11am. Be ready.”

I sigh, knowing there’s no point arguing further, but deep down, I’m touched by his thoughtfulness. “Alright, deal. But only because you’re so annoyingly persistent.”

“You love it” he teases, as I walk out of his room. I sit on the edge of my bed, yellow jumper in hand, shaking my head. Nick could be over the top sometimes, but moments like this reminded me why he was one of my closest friends. I placed the jumper on my bed and smoothed it out, the vibrant yellow popped against the neutral tones of my duvet. It wasn’t my usual style, but it felt cozy, and I couldn’t deny I needed it.

As I set it down, the faint scent wafted up again, warm and slightly spicy. It made me pause. For some reason, it gave me the strangest sense of deja vu, but I dismissed it just as quickly.

My phone buzzed in my pocket, breaking my train of thought. Hopeful, I took it out, but it wasn’t a notification from Matt. I opened our thread anyway, checking to see if he’d responded and I’d missed it.

Read.

The message I sent, sat there unanswered. It was petty of me to even care, but I couldn’t help it. He’d gone to the effort of sending flowers and attaching a note, yet he couldn’t bother to say anything back?

I tossed my phone onto the bed with a sigh, the screen still glaring at me with his name.

Whatever. I don't know why I bothered with Matt at all. I wasn’t going to let his silence ruin my mood after the news Nick gave me.

I picked up the jumper again, pressing it against my chest. It was soft, comforting even. I folded it carefully and placed it in the top drawer of my dresser, smiling faintly at the thought of having something new to wear tomorrow, well, new to me, anyway.

Matt's POV

After Chris ended the call with Y/n, I felt like absolute trash. The hangover was kicking my ass, my head pounding every time I moved. Christina and Rachel had left a couple of hours ago, thankfully leaving Chris and I to just sit and recover in peace.

We were sprawled out in the living room, the TV playing some random movie in the background. Chris was trying to nap, meanwhile, I was doing my best to ignore the lingering pit in my stomach from last night’s events.

My phone buzzed on the armrest next to me. I lazily picked it up and saw a text from Y/n.

Y/n: "Can you tell Chris the business card isn’t in his room."

I sighed and looked over at Chris, who was dozing on the couch. “Hey, Y/n says the business card isn’t in your room.”

Chris perked up slightly, scratching his head. “Shit.. maybe it is in my wallet” he mumbled, checking his back pocket.

I turned back to my phone, typing a short reply.

"Thought you weren’t going to text me again."

The message delivered, and I leaned back into the couch, not expecting much more. My phone dinged almost instantly, though, and I glanced down.

Y/n: "I don’t have a choice when you’re my communication with Chris."

She had got me with that one. But then another message popped up, and this one made me sit up straight.

"Also, I found these."

It was followed by a picture of the card I’d attached to the flowers I sent, sitting in her hand.

"Apology accepted."

My face burned instantly. Embarrassment clawed its way up my chest and settled in my cheeks. Fuck. I can’t believe she found them. I hadn’t even planned to explain myself, it was impulsive, throwing them out, but it also was something I thought she’d ignore or pass off without a second glance. And yet here she was, calling me out on it.

Chris looked over, raising an eyebrow at my sudden movement. “What’s up with you?”

“Nothing” I muttered, trying to compose myself.

I stared at her text for a moment, my mind racing. My fingers hovered over the keyboard, typing out a response.

"Thought Nate could get you some instead."

I hesitated, my thumb hovering over the send button. Debating on whether ot not to press send.

a/n: sorry this took so long to put out, i was super busy and now im sick soooo hopefully i get over it quickly and part 10 is out soon, this is also kinda short n kinda shit so apologiesssss

taglist : @mattybearnard @sturn-33 @ncm9696 @yourfavsturniologirl @crazy4jewel @sodakid1234 @stupendoustreewinner @lovealwayssturniolos @matthewsturniolosss @m4ttsmunch @loveexxx @ilusa @starkeyszn @wonnieeluvvr @dylnblue @valxrieq @maggot3647 @cigarettecemetary @ribread03 @chrisstvrns @bandasaruswrx @noplaceissafeanymore @amexiass @witchofthehour @mattssgf @jetaimevous @v33angel @ivysturnss @urmom69lol @ashlishes @watercolorskyy @sturnioloshottiekay @amelia-sturniolo3 @imjusthereforthesturniolosmut @pvssychicken @alizestvrnss @chrisstxrnsaxe @sophand4n4 @vickytaa @marrykisskilled @bxtchboy69 @yourfavsturniologirl @julisturn @sydneyylainn @sophia-77n @trevorsgodmother @sturnslutz @yourmother29 @girl24cherry @astronea @pinkdyit

#snowy speaks #fire & desire #snowys sturniolo series #snowys series #matt sturniolo #matt sturniolo x reader #matthew sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #chris sturniolo #the sturniolo triplets #nicolas sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #nick sturniolo #enemies to lovers #matt sturniolo fanfic

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oldermenwh0re · 2 days ago

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we can’t be friends- chris sturniolo

authors note: hey guys!! this is my first ever time writing any sort of fan fiction!! this most definitely isn’t my best work lol, but i really hope you guys enjoy it!! im actually really proud of this, it turned out better than i thought😭 and ik i probably need to find a divider LMAO. anyways, enjoy!!!🫶🏼

💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋

“dude, what the fuck is your problem?” chris says while yelling at me.

i sit there, trying to figure out what to say as my eyes begin to water.

“nothing!! what the fuck is your deal? why are you so pressed?” i choke out.

“you keep hanging out with matt, why have you been ignoring me?” he yells, as i can tell he’s about to get upset.

“why do you care? are you jealous or something? not everything is about you!” i yell.

“watch the attitude.” he grunts.

“or what.” i say while looking at him directly in his eyes.

as i wait for him to respond, i start to see this look in his eyes. not anger, not sadness, but hunger. a way he’s never looked at me like before. my stomach flips. for as long as we’ve been friends, we’ve flirted here and there as a joke, since we always mess around, but his eyes are telling me that it might not just be a joke.

he laugh, with a snarky grin on his face.

“oh ill show you. get on the bed. now.”

my stomach drops. he’s never been like this before, and i don’t know if he’s joking or not. i stare at him blankly, not knowing how to respond.

“now.” he says in a growl.

he pushes me onto the bed, as i fall onto my back and my cheeks turn bright red.

i prop myself up with my arms as chris starts walking closer and closer towards me. my heart begins to race. “we’re best friends, we shouldn’t be doing this. we’ve known each other since we were kids.” i thought to myself, but at the same time, my pussy starts to throb, aching for his touch.

as he gets on top of the bed, he pins me down and begins to messily make out with me. our tounges dance together, it’s like our mouths were made for each other.

he starts toying with my sweatpants and my thong, and i lift myself up to help him take it off of me. he gets my gesture, and looks at me while taking it off.

“fuck.” he whispers.

he runs his hands down my body, as my body shivers from his touch. i start aching for his fingers. i pull on his shirt and take it off of him. i run my acrylic nails down his chest, admiring him as much as i can in this moment.

he steps back, taking off his pants and his boxers, and i do the same with my top.

“no bra? fuck ma you’re killing me.”

i smirk, seeing his dick twitch. he gets back on top of me and his mouth instantly attaches to my nipple. i arch my back, already overwhelmed with pleasure. he then leaves love marks all over my body, all the way until he reaches my throbbing pussy. he then kisses my thighs until his head is lined up with my entrance. he then attaches his mouth to my cunt, and i begin to moan in response. he sucks and licks my clit, hitting every. damn. spot.

i grab the sheets in response, overwhelmed with pleasure. fuck he knows what he’s doing. i begin to grab his hair as he’s face to face with my aching core, and he grunts as i pull on his hair.

“fuck chris, im- im- im getting close”

“already? you don’t get to cum until i say so. go it?”

i try to respond but all that comes out are scattered moans.

“answer me.” he says in a growl as he removes his mouth from my leaking cunt.

“y-yes. got it.” i manage to get out in a breathy moan.

he then attaches his lips back to my cunt, going even harder than before. i let out a yelp, feeling that im getting closer and closer.

“chris. fuck. im so close please.” i whimper.

“go ahead, you’ve been such a good girl. you got this.”

just his words send me over the edge, as I squirt all over his face while cumming, and he licks up every last drop.

i lay, trying to catch my breath, and he unexpectedly flips me over onto my stomach.

“ass up, get on all fours.”

i shakily arch my back, getting on all fours with my ass in the air. he smacks my ass before lining himself up with my enterance.

he doesn’t even hesitate to, slamming his cock into my pussy. i let out a load moan, the pleasure becoming too much.

“fuck ma, you’re so tight. it’s like this pussy was made for me.”

i whimper in response, his words making my pussy throb. as i begin to slow down, he notices and begins to insert his two fingers inside my leaking cunt. i let out a yelp, completely overwhelmed with the amount of pleasure.

“fuck chris. i-im so close. please let me cum.”

“go ahead baby, i can feel you getting close. im right there with you. come all over my cock angel.”

i let out a last loud moan, as i release all over him, and he wasn’t far behind as he fills up my pussy to the brim with his seed.

i feel empty as he pulls out. he then goes to get a damp towel, cleaning up the mess we made.

“cmon pretty girl, let’s go get you cleaned up in the shower, yeah?”

i smile and nod my head as he picks me up bridal style, carrying me to the bathroom.

“just letting you know, you’re never getting rid of me now. we need to do this again.”

i smile and laugh, while kissing him on the cheek, following him into the shower.

💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋

hope you guys enjoyed it!! i actually enjoyed writing this and it’s not too bad considering it’s my first blurb hehe. but leave any requests for anything you want me to do in the future!!🤍

taglist: @sweetshuga @chrisissobabygirl @strnilolover @solarsturniolo @hearts4werka @chrisbunnys @maliabakerscurls @ghostface712 @endereies @sturniololuv08 @m4ggvt @natalie69sworld

( oh and let me know if you want to be added or removed !)

#sturniolo triplets #chris sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo x reader #sturniolo smut #nick sturniolo #matthew sturniolo #chris sturniolo x reader #oldermenwh0re

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admirationandromantics · 2 days ago

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Best Friend's Brother

This request is literally 10 days old, which, to some, might not seem as a long time. For me however, it is. I'm sorry, but as I've described, I'm just trying to balance writing and school right now, so I'll be writing a little less than before.

Word count: 1,6k (unedited)

could u write a best friend older brother trope josh x reader. luv you works btww xx -anon

I knock on the door, waiting for Beth to open up. We’d planned a movie night while her parents were gone, and Hannah was at Sam’s. Josh was still home, but she told me he wouldn’t be a bother, and would probably stay in his room the whole night.

I have met him many times before, and would even call us friends. Though at the same time, I often wonder if he looks at me like another baby sister, despite only being one year apart. He often gives me a hard time, teasing me and joking around, but most times, I don’t mind. I usually also hope that he never means anything with his small occasional comments, because nothing will happen either way. My best friend’s brother? That would be a problem just waiting to happen.

Josh and I have been drunk together, partied together and been on get togethers together, though I’m not familiar with everyone in their group yet.

I stand outside, my patience running low in the cold weather, wishing I brought a scarf. I hear footsteps coming from inside. Finally. The door unlocks, and a broad, tan Josh in a thin rolled up sweater and some sweatpants stands there, arm against the doorframe. He gives a small smile, looking me over.

“Well, look who decided to come while the parents are out” he coos, a small whistling sound coming out of his lips.

“Well, hello Joshua, care to let me in?”

He smiles, contemplating whether to make this difficult or not. I look around, sighing and waiting for an answer, thinking about shouting Beth’s name and telling her that her brother is being a prick. Luckily, he opens the door further, making space for me to walk inside. “Thank you” I say, trying to hide my smile a bit. I’ve been here many times before, so I immediately know where to hang my coat and leave everything else. Josh keeps standing there, watching me.

“Beth is out, said something about getting snacks for your movie night” He explains, and I nod. The store is not far from here, so she will probably be back soon.

“Well then, do you know which movie she’s got planned?”

“Of course I do, I’m the one who helps pick them out”

I give him a curious and sceptical look, not having heard this before. He keeps his gaze locked on my gaze, a small smirk playing on his lips.

“Have you?”

“Every time”

My mouth opens a little. Beth is always talking about her great taste in movies, never having mentioned this before.

“No, are you serious? Beth has never given you any credit”

“Little sisters… what do you expect?”

I hum, not knowing how to respond to that. I walk inside, him following closely as I sit myself by the kitchen counter.

“So, what movie have you chosen then?” I ask, looking up at him again. Instead of sitting, he just leans against the counter with one arm, body turned my way. I can’t help my gaze, looking over his revealed forearms.

“Something a bit different than usual…” he smirks, eyes following my gaze down to his arms. I break free, leaning forward a bit.

“Okay, what movie?”

“A scary one”

“No”

“Oh yes”

I whine, leaning back again. I hate scary movies, I hate jumpscares and gore. Why can’t people just like normal, funny, cozy stuff?

“Josh, are you serious?”

“And there we go, you’re starting to use my nickname”

“Joshua! Are you serious?”

“Well, that lasted for long”

I sigh, rolling my eyes. This is not how I want to spend my night, and considering that the walk home will be dark and scary, this movie will definitely fuel my fears.

“Hey, calm down, it’s a good movie, maybe you just haven’t seen a good scary movie yet, this one might change your mind about the whole genre” He smiles, a hand going to my arm. I can't help the small blush coming from the touch, his fingers warm and comforting. I don’t want to do this, but I really can’t object when Beth is the one getting everything ready, and I just need to show up and have a good time. Or pretend I’m having a good time.

The door opens, and his hand is immediately removed as Beth comes in, a big bag in her hands. She doesn’t notice me at first.

“Beth!” I exclaim, and she lifts her head, nose a little red from the cold outside.

“Hey, oh sorry, I didn’t have time to go earlier today”

“That’s completely fine, here, let me take it” I state, walking over and taking the bag from her hands as she starts undressing.

“My brother didn’t bother you?”

I look over at him, and he just gives a small laugh, shaking his head and putting his hands up defensively.

“No, he was fine”

“Good, now, let's go” She smiles, leading me away from him, into their living room. She finds a couple of bowls, letting me distribute the snack in them as she works on getting the movie going.

“Okay, so I know you’re not a scary movie-person, but I know this one is really good, so please, keep an open mind”

I laugh a little, thinking back on the fact that Josh is the one who actually picked this out.

“I’ll keep an open mind then”

“Great”

The movie starts, and we both sit down, a blanket over us as the lights dim. At first, the movie seems fine, the occasional jump scare, which scares me much more than it does Beth. Still, I keep watching, body tense and uncomfortable, but I can’t take my eyes off it. We’re in the middle when someone gets violently cut up, and the camera doesn’t bother to show us anything else than the blood and flesh flying everywhere, the gore not stopping. I take a breath, pulling my eyes from the screen and standing up.

“I just need to use the bathroom”

“Gonna puke?”

I laugh a little, the tension in my shoulders easing as she talks.

“No, but if there’s no important information in this sequence, please feel free to skip it, I'll be quick” I say, already making my way to the yellow-lighted hallway. It's light, in contrast to the room I was just in, and that makes me ease up a little more. Gosh, if this was to keep going, I wouldn’t dare walking home tonight.

Suddenly, I hear a click, and the light goes away, leaving me in the dark hallway. I stop, looking around, unsure about what just happened. Another breath escapes my lips, reminding me that I can’t keep holding my breath everytime something startling happens. The hallway looks empty both ways, so I continue further, crossing my fingers that the light in the bathroom at least works.

Before I can react, a couple of strong arms grab me from behind, caging me. I’m about to yell out, but as if anticipating it, the hand goes over my mouth, muffling my screams. I’m slammed into the wall, not too hard, luckily, but I close my eyes before the impact arrives. As I open them again, a smiling Josh is standing in front of me, biting his lips to hold in his laugh. My heart is still beating fast, breaths coming in and out in a rapid manner. I grab his hand roughly, dragging it off my mouth.

“Joshua Washington! Are you fucking insane??”

He bursts out laughing, arms against the wall beside me, holding himself up as he leans over. I shake my head, mouth still a little open in shock, whilst he can’t stop laughing.

“Maybe, but you should’ve seen your face!” He chuckles, one of his hands going to his stomach to compose himself. It’s probably hurting right now from all the laughter.

“Joshua! What the hell is wrong with you!?”

“Okay, okay, calm down, just a little prank on my part” He smiles, finally calming down.

“I have been watching a fucking horror movie, and you pull this shit?”

He bites his lip again, tilting his head a bit to examine me.

“Oh, come on now, you’re totally thinking it’s funny”

“No, I’m not”

“Or you’re into it or something…”

“Wait, what, no I’m not, what kind of sick-”

Before I can process what’s happening, his lips are on me. I feel his breath, his body close, soft lips moving ove mine. My heart is still beating rapidly, but oddly enough, it calms with the way he’s touching me. Tender and carefully, not like himself at all. His hand goes to my waist, body pressing mine into the wall, opening his mouth a little. I hear a little groan leaving his throat. He pulls away, faces close as his eyes go over me, looking up and down. I almost think he looks a little vulnerable, but his signature smirk finds its way to his lips again.

“Well then, calmer now?”

I look at him, confused, conflicted. I scoff, shaking my head a bit.

“No, I think I need a little more help” I state, hand going to the back of his neck, pulling him into me again. Capturing his lips on mine, already opening my mouth. He does the same, one hand on my hips, pulling me into him.

“Hey, finished in the bathroom soon? I’ve paused the movie, the gore is over!” Beth shouts from the living room. We both pull away from each other and look over to the living room, luckily not seeing her there. I look back at him, seeing his chest heaving, hot breaths coming from his mouth. He turns, looking into my eyes.

“Guess we better finish calming you down later” He smiles, pushing himself off me and the wall, walking back to his room.

Fuck, what have I gotten myself into?

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gaytommykinard · 3 days ago

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"you don't like mpreg?" i don't even like fpreg

#send post #i have to do everything myself around here :/

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4vanaa · 2 days ago

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WHILE YOU WERE SLEEPING, rafe cameron, 18

summary: y/n left the outer banks years ago, determined to build a life far from the memories of her childhood love, rafe cameron. now a botanist, she's moved on-though a quiet part of her still clings to the past. when an event brings her back to OBX, she's forced to confront the one person she never truly forgot.

cw: angst | masterlist | 17 | 19 |

The sun was beginning to set over the Outer Banks as you and Noah arrived at the Chateau.

The house buzzed with laughter and familiar chaos, the kind of energy that only their group could bring. Noah seemed at ease as you approached, his hand resting lightly on the small of your back. It was a small gesture, but it made you feel grounded.

“You ready for this?” You asked, giving him a teasing smile.

“As ready as I’ll ever be,” he chuckled. “Meeting your closest friends all at once feels like an ambush, but I’ll manage.”

You rolled your eyes, pulling him through the doorway. “They’ll love you. Just be yourself.”

Inside, the introductions began, and within minutes, Noah was doing what Noah did best—charming everyone.

“You’re into environmental work?” Pope asked, his eyes lighting up. “What’s your focus?”

“Mostly restoration and conservation efforts,” Noah said, leaning forward in his seat. “Right now, I’ve been looking at coastal erosion and its impact on wildlife ecosystems. It’s why I was in South America for a bit. But I’ve always been fascinated by sustainability and—”

“Okay, nerds,” JJ interrupted, grinning. “We’re at dinner, not a lecture hall.”

Noah laughed easily, unbothered by JJ’s teasing. “Fair. I’ll try to keep the nerd talk to a minimum.”

“Don’t worry,” Kie added, her voice light. “Pope and I will corner you later for all the details. It’s cool to meet someone who actually gives a damn about the planet.”

As the conversation shifted, Noah found himself bonding with JJ over surfing. They swapped stories, and JJ even suggested they hit the waves before the wedding. Cleo, sitting across from them, leaned back in her chair and studied Noah with a critical eye.

“I don’t trust it,” she declared.

Everyone fell silent for a moment, confused.

“Don’t trust what?” Sarah asked, her brow furrowed.

“Him.” Cleo pointed dramatically at Noah, though her tone was playful. “He’s too perfect. Smart, good-looking, and nice? There’s gotta be a catch.”

Noah laughed, shaking his head. “I promise, no catch. I’m just a guy.”

“He really is,” You chimed in, smiling at Cleo. “Told you guys you’d love him.”

Sarah nudged you, her voice lowering. “He’s even cuter in person. I’m so happy for you.”

You gave her a grateful smile. Everything was going well. Noah fit seamlessly into your world. Everyone liked him—everyone except for Rafe.

Rafe had been quiet most of the night, his standoffishness obvious to anyone paying attention. He leaned back in his chair, nursing a glass of bourbon, his gaze flicking to Noah every so often with thinly veiled annoyance.

When you reached over to brush something off Noah’s sleeve, Rafe’s jaw tightened. He couldn’t hold his tongue any longer.

“So, Noah,” Rafe started, his tone deceptively light. “You’re just… this nice all the time?”

The room quieted slightly, everyone picking up on the edge in his voice.

Noah glanced at him, his expression neutral. “I try to be myself, yeah.”

“Right.” Rafe let out a dry laugh, swirling his drink. “Seems a little too good to be true, doesn’t it? Nobody’s that nice. You sure it’s not all an act?”

“Rafe,” you snapped, glaring at him. “Cut it out.”

“What?” Rafe feigned innocence, looking around the table. “Just saying, it’s a little suspicious. No one’s that perfect. He’s gotta have a flaw, right?”

Noah tensed beside you, but his voice remained calm. “I don’t think being nice is a flaw.”

“Of course you don’t,” Rafe muttered under his breath.

“Alright, that’s enough,” you said firmly, your voice sharp. “Noah’s been nothing but kind to everyone here. Maybe you could try doing the same for once.”

The tension at the table was palpable, but Noah reached over and placed a calming hand on yours. “It’s fine,” he said softly, his voice soothing. “Really.”

“No, it’s not,” you insisted, glaring at Rafe again.

“He’s been nothing but rude, and I’m not going to sit here and let him ruin tonight.”

After dinner, you stepped outside for a moment of air. The night was quiet except for the soft chirp of crickets. You wrapped your arms around yourself, staring up at the stars, when you heard the sound of footsteps behind you.

“You just can’t help yourself, can you?” you said without turning around.

“Funny, I was going to say the same to you,” Rafe replied, leaning against the porch railing.

You sighed, finally looking at him. “What do you want, Rafe?

“I want to know why you keep pretending this thing with him is real,” he said, his voice low.

You stared at him, incredulous. “Are you serious right now? He’s my boyfriend.”

“And I’m supposed to believe you’re in love with him?” he challenged, stepping closer.

“I am in love with him,” you said firmly.

Rafe’s laugh was bitter, cutting. “Sure. That’s why you can’t even look at me without falling apart.”

Your chest tightened, but you stood your ground. “Please don’t do this.”

“Why not?” he asked, his voice softening. “You know how I feel about you, Sunshine.”

“Stop calling me that,” you snapped, your voice breaking slightly. “I love Noah. I don’t know how many times I have to say it before you get it.”

Rafe stepped closer, his eyes searching yours.“You can say it a hundred times, and I still won’t believe it.”

You swallowed hard, the weight of your words suffocating even as they left your lips. “You think this is love? Acting like a child every time I’m happy? Making me feel like I owe you something just because you can’t let go?”

Rafe flinched like you’d slapped him, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed thickly. The sharp glint in his eyes dulled, replaced by something much heavier, much harder to look at.

“Can’t let go?” he repeated quietly, almost to himself. He let out a bitter laugh, his voice trembling on the edge of something vulnerable. “I let you go, Y/N. I let you walk away. I let you be with him because I thought… I thought you’d come back.”

Your chest tightened, but you kept your gaze steady. “That’s not fair, Rafe. I didn’t ask you to wait for me.”

“No, you didn’t,” he agreed, stepping closer. “But you also didn’t tell me how to stop waiting, did you? You didn’t tell me how to stop hoping. You left, and I stayed here trying to figure out how to fix myself, because I thought maybe—just maybe—if I did, you’d see me differently.”

“Rafe…” you started, your voice softening despite yourself.

“But it was never enough,” he continued, his voice cracking. “I wasn’t enough. And now you’re with him, and he’s perfect, right? He doesn’t yell, doesn’t screw up. He’s everything I’ll never be.”

“Stop,” you said, your throat tight. “You don’t know him like I do.”

“I don’t need to,” Rafe shot back, his eyes burning with emotion. “I see the way you look at him, and I hate it. I hate him because he gets what I spent years trying to be good enough for.”

You clenched your fists at your sides, your resolve wavering. “This isn’t about you, Rafe. This is about me choosing what’s best for me.”

“And you think he’s best for you?” he asked, his voice trembling with disbelief. “Fine. Maybe he is. But don’t stand here and tell me what I feel isn’t love. Don’t act like I didn’t try.”

You looked away, unable to meet his gaze, the weight of his pain crashing over you like a wave. “You think this is easy for me?” you whispered. “I hate this. I hate that you’re hurting because of me.”

“Then don’t do it,” Rafe said, stepping closer. His voice was low, pleading. “You don’t have to hate me, Sunshine. Just… don’t push me away like this. Not like I mean nothing to you.”

Your breath caught at the use of the nickname, the softness in his tone slicing through your defenses. You shook your head, your voice breaking. “I’m trying to move on, Rafe. Why can’t you let me?”

“Because I don’t want to,” he admitted, his words raw and unfiltered. “Because moving on means letting go of the only thing that’s ever made sense to me. And I can’t. I won’t.”

You turned away, your chest heaving with the effort of keeping your tears at bay. “This isn’t fair, Rafe. To me, to Noah, to you. You’re not the only one hurting.”

“You’re right,” he said, his voice quieter now, almost defeated. “It’s not fair. But you’re the one who keeps telling me to be better, and I’m trying. I swear I’m trying. But every time I see you with him, it feels like I’m being ripped apart all over again.”

You turned back to him then, your eyes wet and glistening. “You’re hurting yourself, Rafe. You’re doing this to yourself.”

“I know,” he said softly, his voice barely above a whisper. “But I don’t know how to stop. Not when it’s you.”

Your heart shattered at the raw honesty in his words, but you steeled yourself, knowing you had to draw the line. “I chose Noah,” you said firmly, though your voice wavered. “I don’t know how many times I have to say it before you believe me.”

Rafe looked at you, his eyes glassy, and for the first time, you saw just how deeply you had cut him. He nodded slowly, his shoulders slumping in defeat. “I hear you,” he said, his voice barely audible. “I just… I wish it was me.”

The air between them was thick and suffocating, and before you could stop yourself, you whispered, “I wish you’d tried harder before it was too late.”

The moment the words left your mouth, you regretted them. Rafe’s expression twisted, his pain now painted clearly across his face. He opened his mouth, as if to say something, but then closed it again, swallowing hard.

You stepped back, the guilt clawing at your chest. “I’m sorry,” you whispered, though it felt meaningless now.

Rafe turned away, his hands shoved into his pockets as he stared out into the dark. “Yeah,” he said after a long pause, his voice hollow. “Me too.”

And just like that, the fragile thread between you snapped.

You stood frozen, the weight of your words lingering in the air as Rafe turned and walked away into the darkness. You wiped at your eyes hastily, willing yourself to stay composed. But as you turned back toward the house, you stopped short, your heart sinking.

Noah was standing near the doorway, half-hidden by the shadows, his expression unreadable. He hadn’t meant to eavesdrop, but the tail end of your conversation had carried to him like a whisper on the wind. His gaze lingered on you, searching your face for something—answers, reassurance, or maybe just the truth you couldn’t quite admit to yourself yet.

For a moment, he said nothing, his jaw tightening slightly before he finally smiled softly, as if to brush it off. “You okay, sweetheart?” he asked, his voice as warm and steady as ever.

You nodded quickly, forcing a smile in return. “Yeah,” you lied, walking toward him. But as he wrapped his arm around your shoulders, pulling you into his chest, your mind wandered—back to the look in Rafe’s eyes, to the pain you couldn’t seem to escape.

And though Noah didn’t say anything more, his grip on you tightened, as if silently reminding you that he wasn’t going anywhere. Not yet.

a/n: started drafting the ending. you guys will be happy!!

🏷️: @xoxo-ada @sabrina-carpenter-stan-account @sleepiibunniiii @urbrunettebombshell @sideboobrry11 @acidfeens @marleymarleymarleymarley @hadids-world @ursogorgeous1313 @louxmcl @cyberkitty1 @pogueprincesa @rlalliehayes @evelynffics

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carasspice · 1 day ago

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"Hey boss, do you have a few minutes?" I asked at almost 6.00p.m. and some time after every else had left for the day, my eyes blinked a number of times as I realised how she was dressed. "Oh hell, I'm sorry for intruding."

"Stop shaking Andy, I should be the one to apologise, I don't normally wander around half undressed but I can't get the air-con to work in here. Anyhow, as long as you can put up with me like this come in and take a seat. What did you want to talk to me about?"

"I have no idea, my mind has just left me somewhere. This may be out of order but I can put up with you in lingerie any time. You look fabulous and that bottom ... "

"I should thank you for the compliment but my bottom is what exactly?"

I'd backed myself into a corner, I knew it and so did she. I knew what I was thinking and what I'd love to do with her bottom as well as the rest of her body but considered it safer to keep quiet.

"So what were you going to say about my bottom Andy? Out with it."

Oh hell and that was something else on my mind, my trousers were getting tighter with every word and every second passing by.

"Nothing boss."

"Nothing? I think not." she replied, placed that folder on her desk, turned, stepped towards me and sat on my legs facing me with her arms curled around my neck leaving me to stare directly at her breasts. "I am well aware that many men have fantasies about what they would love to do with a woman's bottom Andy and I assume you are no different. Yes I know what you would love to do with my bottom as well as my pussy. I'm not deaf you know and do hear various comments from you lot and if any of you so much as touch either mine or my secretary's derriere you will be out of here in ten minutes flat. You might like to know that my bottom has been fucked by my boyfriend on occasions as well as the more regular sex life activities and I rather enjoy each and every episode. Oh and my name is either Miss Davenport or the bitch upstairs I gather."

"Yes boss and I apologise."

"You apologise to which one?"

"Oh Miss Davenport, shall I take a look at the air-con now?" My face must have been bright red as I tinkered with the control, cancelled everything and reprogrammed it, it took me maybe five or six minutes but it was working.

"Thank you Andy." she said as I clambered down from the desk only to watch her turn around, bend forward and smack her right cheek. "There you go Andy, fantasise as much as you like but never touch a lady's bottom without an invitation and none than my boyfriend gets one of those. Please try to remember what you wanted to ask me and I'll be here by 8.15 as always. Goodnight.

xxx

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aangelinakii · 3 days ago

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LOVE BITES.

— am i making you feel sick?

summary : there was always something up with your boyfriend; he would only ever take you out on dates at night, but only if he wasn't on patrol, and that was a big if. if one of you went round the other's and you made a nice italian dish with garlic, he would apologise and say he didn't feel well. if walking the city at night, he'd offer to take you the long way home, and you noticed he always said that as the cathedral building began to loom into view. he couldn't be... no... surely not... but you had to ask. was your boyfriend a vampire?

note : dark themes possibly because dick is a thirsty lil vamp

note 2 : anf also do you get the title..... because i'm saying love bites as in the verb because hés a vampire but also lovebites like lovebites like.... 😂😂😂😂😂😅😅😅😅😅 ok bye go read now xxxxx

from up here, the streaking city of gotham seemed so small. darkness enveloped the roof of the fire escape you'd dashed up to after dinner — which you'd cooked and remembered to leave garlic out of — but the streets below were still struck with headlights and tail-lights and everything in between.

he'd eaten all the plates you'd offered him, and even shared a bowl of homemade eton mess, but he still looked a bit peaky; even in the shadows the moonlight cast along the divots of his face.

"you okay? still hungry?" you hummed, causing him to glance back at you from the busy streets below.

the corner of his mouth curled up, revealing one of those sharp canines of his, which twinkled in the moon above. "like you have no idea," he chuckled, turning back to where he leaned against the railing.

"oh— i think there was some more left over," you responded quickly, gesturing back to the fire escape door being held open by a brick dick had found up here. "it'll be warm still."

with that, you were about to walk back down the stairs to your apartment, but, before you could move, dick extended his arm around your shoulders and pulled you back into his side. despite his layers, you'd noticed he was almost always as cold as ice. "hey, i'm joking," he said, but there was something lying beneath his upbeat tone. "don't worry about it. let's stay here for a bit still, i'm enjoying myself."

despite the pang of worry in your chest, his words didn't fail to bring a smile to your face, and you instinctively snaked an arm around his waist, elbow pressing into his jacket to hold him there and keep him there.

for a few long, tranquil moments, there was nothing else but you and him, the light buzz of the city mere white noise soothing you further.

but it seemed no matter how perfect everything was — how perfect he was — you couldn't shake it from your mind.

"what are you?"

the words swam from your lips like a stream that trickles along the edge of a damp forest, clustered with thick roots and fallen leaves. you didn't look up when you spoke, lids half-hung over your eyes, the building across the way standing in the lower half of your vision.

under your arm, dick's frame shifted; you could feel him shimmy to peer at you, his noir waves brushing along your forehead. the breath of a chuckle passed his own lips. "what do you mean? i'm your boyfriend."

he said it like it was obvious — because why wouldn't it be?

"i'm your boyfriend and i love you," he returned, holding you tighter. you could practically feel his smile against the side of your head.

still, your own smile couldn't help but grow, and you sank further into his hold, another arm coming to wrap around his waist. "well, i know that," you laughed, though struggling to keep it down where it bubbled: this was supposed to be serious. but when was dick ever serious?

taking a haste breath in, you pried your head away from him until his whole face came into view, your arms still holding each other close. "but i mean what are you?"

by now, dick had certainly noticed the swift change in your tone, the way your smile had faded, its remnants the ghost of lines at the corners of your mouth. like a superimposition fading into the other image, his own smile began to drop to a neutral line, eyes glinting with curiosity.

his hands slowly travelled up from your back, the coolness of his touch even harsh through your coat and the layers beneath. as his fingers ran along the sculpture of your clothed shoulder blades, a chill started at the base of your vertebrae and danced down to your feet.

"i can be anything you want me to be."

his eyes looked between yours, some sort of earnesty lingering in those dark, dark pupils. almost as if you'd stare so deep and glimpse his past lives.

"i can be your soldier, your knight, your poet, your playwright."

perhaps not almost — perhaps you were.

similarly as his hands had moved, yours drifted to his chest, where the firmness of his pecs caused a swell to swirl in your knees.

"if you take all that away," you began, voice quieter now, a waver in its steadiness, "what would you be?"

never before had you seen dick look anything like this... a quiver of his bottom lip, one finger twitched on your shoulder blade in uncertainty, a crease formed between his brows; like it would all spill out any moment now...

"you wouldn't like it."

even now when he spoke it was as though he couldn't bear to hear himself talk; perhaps less that you wouldn't like it, that he didn't like it.

your hands rose and found the curved base of his shoulders, touch soft and warm, the latter a contrast to his. "i like you, dick. i love you, in fact. i trust you and i love you. but you have some... quirks — as we all do — and i think i want you to be honest with me."

dick lowered his gaze, fingers instinctively gripping you tighter, holding you closer. but it was like he couldn't stand himself.

"we never see each other during the day — which, fair enough," you began, voice finding its strength now. "but it gets to a point where you won't eat the things i make if there's a specific ingredient, or you'll leave the bathroom immediately when i come in, even if you're just washing your hands and i need something from the cabinet."

with each word his separate winces grew greater; a twitch of his eyebrow, a flare of his nostrils, a scowl that disappears as soon as he makes it.

but once you'd finished your bit, dick didn't speak.

for a single moment, his hands moved to ghost over your shoulder blades, where they'd previously sat fine. was he too cold or were you too warm?

when you squeezed his shoulders lightly, they came back, just as cold as ever.

"i'm a monster."

the words seemed to reverberate along the rooftop. even though you knew what you were waiting for, the anguished tone that came from him caused you to crumble, that swell returning to your knees.

you knew he'd hate you to pity him, but you felt your eyebrows curve and eyes soften and something throbbed in your chest.

your hands found the base of his jaw, and carefully lifted his head so he'd meet your gaze once again. "you would never be a monster. i know what you are, but i also know who you are. that never changed; will never change. okay?"

deep in his throat, his adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed down a damp thickness, but he brought himself to nod.

"you said you were hungry?"

for a couple beats, dick stared at you with a furrow in his brows — and then his eyes lit in recognition, but like when a red light goes off, not when a lightbulb ignites.

"no. no, absolutely not." he shook his head, attempting to shrug off your soft touch, the weight of his own hands disappearing from your back. but you didn't back down.

"dick, i trust you," you retorted, hands lowering to where his neck met his shoulders, firm but loving. "i– i don't know how this works, but... it's okay. do it, it's okay."

although he'd stopped in his tracks, eyeing you, half in curiosity, half in contempt. you wouldn't do this. surely not.

one hand came off his neck, and you tilted your head to the side, bringing your fingers to the collar of your jacket.

soft flesh, tender; a quickly-beating, thumping pulse.

dick could hear it, practically taste it, and his own heart began pumping, hammering, blood rushing to his ears.

a force inside him, gribbing him from his stomach, was holding him back; but a pair of hands was shoving him forward, that devil on his shoulder whispering in his ear. feed, feed, feed.

the turmoil was evident in his face, and the hand still on his shoulder trailed down to his wrist; thumb on veins, his blood was racing faster than you'd ever felt it. you pulled him forward. "it's okay," you reassured him again.

"are you... are you sure? i mean... you've never met someone like me. i don't— i don't usually... feed on living people."

god, he felt stupid saying all these things out loud. but he needed to remind himself: this is what he was. no changing it now. no choices left.

ignoring the thuddering against your rib cage, you urged him closer with another tug on his wrist, never removing your gaze from his. "i'm more than sure. i think."

he couldn't ignore the certainty in your tone, your firm answer; couldn't ignore the hearty, tender scent filling his senses.

one hand came to carefully grip the back of your head, holding it in place, neck perfect for him to sink his teeth into. the other found its old place upon your shoulder blades, a soft touch to distract you from his violence.

he was close; so close his breath was grazing the pulse in your neck, a sensation both hot and cold, both blood-curdling and nauseating, but also passionate and loving. whatever he would do to you, he'd do it with utmost care.

a whisper in your ear, "tell me if you feel sick."

and then needle broke thread, fangs into flesh.

a gasp echoed in the air, hanging thick and then swirling into the streets below, to be caught up in the smog of the cars. your hands found his broad back, fingers gripping the fabric of his coat, balling it in fists.

much like getting blood taken at the doctors, it was piercing on impact, but lulling as it continued.

another gasp fell from your mouth as something warm dribbled from the new wound, down your cold neck, and a serpent slithered down to lap it up carefully.

beneath your touch, dick seemed to feel stronger, his already-large muscles thickening.

to live like this was to kill yourself slowly, unless you had vessels to kill on your behalf. would you be that vessel forever?

it ended with a soft kiss against the stinging fang-wounds, and the pain ceased.

when dick finally pulled away, his lips were plump and pink, stained with what ran through your every living moment, and he was breathless, chest heaving — yours wasn't any different, a combination of shock and energy drain.

"was that okay?" dick sighed quietly, his fangs sharpest you'd ever seen as they glinted with each word, his gaze set on your neck, where the pad of his thumb brushed the healed wound carefully.

"i mean... define 'okay'."

the corner of his lip curled in amusement. "not dying. head not spinning. neck not stinging." but something flickered in his features: uncertainty. "not rethinking this relationship?"

this was where you hesitated, admittedly. certainly not rethinking, but definitely thinking about it.

it was now that you realised your hands were still fisted, and you infurled them carefully, letting go of his jacket as you did so. "definitely okay," you smiled, though an air of awkwardness still hung. "but i think i could use the leftovers of dinner. i think all that takes a lot out of someone."

dick's features slackened, relieved, almost.

he threw a strong arm around your shoulders and pulled you into his side as he had done at the beginning of the night. "i wouldn't expect you to be doing great, but... thank you. that's helped more than you could even know." a few beats passed, dick's chest swelling, your smile brightening. "anyways, let's get some food in you. you deserve it more than me."

#aangelinakii #dc #dc comics #dc imagines #dc reactions #dc headcanons #dc universe #richard grayson #dick grayson #dick grayson reactions #dick grayson drabble #dick grayson imagines #dick grayson x reader #dick grayson headcanons #nightwing #nightwing imagines #nightwing x reader #Spotify

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