#dismantled into juice

[disease]

BLAWAN // TOAST [DISMANTLED INTO JUICE EP, MAY 2023]

[knightofleo]

Blawan | Toast

[iamlisteningto]

Blawan’s Dismantled Into Juice

[mossy-crow0]

Gillion Tidestrider, Champion of the Undersea, Hero of the Deep, Pigeon Lord, The One, Warrior of Rock and Roll, Singer/Songwriter of Gillion and the Tidestriders' hit single "The Hole in Your Heart", Moisture Master, Horse Tamer, Defenestrator of the Adulterous, Friend of Dugon, Dugon's Best Friend, Walking Fish, Fish, Dirt Eater, Chum of Chibo and Chums, Co-Captain Gill of the Riptide Pirates, Co-captain of the Albatross, Companion of Pretzel, Paramount Champion, Knighter of Julian That One Time, Pretzel Carrier, Leviathan Tamer, Serpent Rider, Brother of Dugon, Healer of the Sick, Friend of Duke D Dukem Duke of Dooke, Eater of Grass, Beater of Ass, Grandma's Good Boy, Dismantler of Evil, Eater of Shit, Capitalism Hater, Royalty Assassinator, Sufferer of the Spice, Weed Eater, Slayer of Evil, Loffinlot Liberator, Fruitninja, Eater of Sand, Juice Enjoyer, Rescuer of John, Fishy, Bitcoin Miner, NFT Purchaser, Driplord, Grandmillion, The One Who Will Change The World, Grimm Slayer, In Need of a Dad, Goblin Gobbler, Lime Lord, Tuber, Chip's Nightmare Fuel, Monsoon And Moon Son, Eater of Ass, Pretzel Seeker, Vibe Master, Pussy Slayer, Murderer of Vice Admiral Kuba Kinta, Gillion Mother-fucking Titty-sucking Tidestrider, Egg Hater, Bong Obliterator, Baby signer, Babygirl

wow that’s a lot. anyway.

[amjustgoose]

Big fan of those fanarts of all of Charlie's characters where it's just

- Charlie Slimecicle

- Charlie Slimecicle

- Charlie Slimecicle

- dnd character that vaguely looks like Charlie Slimecicle

- dnd character that really looks like Charlie Slimecicle

- SIR GILLION TIDESTRIDER, CHAMPION OF THE UNDERSEA, HERO OF THE DEEP, PIGEON LORD, THE ONE, WARRIOR OF ROCK AND ROLL, SINGER/SONGWRITER OF GILLION AND THE TIDESTRIDERS' HIT SINGLE "THE HOLE IN YOUR HEART", MOISTURE MASTER, HORSE TAMER, DEFENESTRATOR OF THE ADULTEROUS, FRIEND OF DUGON, DUGON'S BEST FRIEND, DUGON'S PAL, WALKING FISH, FISH, DIRT EATER, CHUM OF CHIBO AND CHUMS, CO-CAPTAIN GILL OF THE RIPTIDE PIRATES, CO-CAPTAIN OF THE ALBATROSS, COMPANION OF PRETZEL, PARAMOUNT CHAMPION, KNIGHTER OF JULIAN THAT ONE TIME, PRETZEL CARRIER, LEVIATHAN TAMER, SERPENT RIDER, BROTHER OF DUGON, HEALER OF THE SICK, FRIEND OF DUKE D DUKEM DUKE OF DOOKE, EATER OF GRASS, BEATER OF ASS, GRANDMA'S GOOD BOY, DISMANTLER OF EVIL, EATER OF SHIT, CAPITALISM HATER, ROYALTY ASSASSINATOR, SUFFERER OF THE SPICE, WEED EATER, SLAYER OF EVIL, LOFFINLOT LIBERATOR, FRUITNINJA, EATER OF SAND, JUICE ENJOYER, RESCUER OF JOHN, FISHY, BITCOIN MINER, NFT PURCHASER, DRIPLORD, GRANDMILLION, THE ONE WHO WILL CHANGE THE WORLD, ROLLER OF TENS, GRIMM SLAYER, IN NEED OF A DAD, GOBLIN GOBBLER, LIME LORD, TUBER, CHIP'S NIGHTMARE FUEL, MONSOON AND MOON SON, EATER OF ASS, PRETZEL SEEKER, VIBE MASTER, PUSSY SLAYER, MURDERER OF VICE ADMIRAL KUBA KENTA, GILLION MOTHER-FUCKING TITTY-SUCKING TIDESTRIDER, EGG HATER, BONG OBLITERATOR, BABY SIGNER, BABYGIRL, THE RED ONE, SKILLION LIEDSNEAKER, FISHY BOY, TIDESTRIZZER, RIZZ REVERENT, JORTS STORM, HERO OF THE HOUR, POPPER OF SACKS, TREE HUGGER, SUMMONER RIDER AND BROTHER OF LUCY.

[smoky-mountain-ghost]

Grizz. Babygirl. WHERE ARE MY LITTLE PIRATES.

We’re going CRAZY.

Chip Bastard. Jay Ferin. Gillion Tidestrider Champion of the Undersea, Hero of the Deep Pigeon Lord, The One, Warrior of Rock and Roll, Singer/Songwriter of Gillion and the Tidestriders' hit single "The Hole in Your Heart", Moisture Master, Horse Tamer, Defenestrator of the Adulterous, Friend of Dugon, Dugon's Best Friend, Dugon's Pal, Walking Fish, Fish, Dirt Eater, Chum of Chibo and Chums, Co-Captain Gill of the Riptide Pirates, Co-captain of the Albatross, Companion of Pretzel, Paramount Champion, Knighter of Julian That One Time, Pretzel Carrier, Leviathan Tamer, Serpent Rider, Brother of Dugon, Healer of the Sick, Friend of Duke D Dukem Duke of Dooke, Eater of Grass, Beater of Ass, Grandma's Good Boy, Dismantler of Evil, Eater of Shit, Capitalism Hater, Royalty Assassinator, Sufferer of the Spice, Weed Eater, Slayer of Evil, Loffinlot Liberator, Fruitninja, Eater of Sand, Juice Enjoyer, Rescuer of John, Fishy, Bitcoin Miner, NFT Purchaser, Driplord, Grandmillion, The One Who Will Change The World, Roller of Tens, Grimm Slayer, In Need of a Dad, Goblin Gobbler, Lime Lord, Tuber, Chip's Nightmare Fuel, Monsoon And Moon Son, Eater of Ass, Pretzel Seeker, Vibe Master, Pussy Slayer, Murderer of Vice Admiral Kuba Kenta, Gillion Mother-fucking Titty-sucking Tidestrider, Egg Hater, Bong Obliterator, Baby signer, Babygirl, The Red One, Skillion Liedsneaker, Fishy Boy, Tidestrizzer, Rizz Reverent, Jort Storm, Hero of the Hour, Popper of Sacks, Tree Hugger, Summoner Rider, Brother of Lucy and Gilly.

[valeovalairs]

Guys look it’s Gillion Tidestrider, Champion of the Undersea-

-Hero of the Deep, Pigeon Lord, The One, Warrior of Rock and Roll, Singer/Songwriter of Gillion and the Tidestriders' hit single "The Hole in Your Heart", Moisture Master, Horse Tamer, Defenestrator of the Adulterous, Friend of Dugon, Dugon's Best Friend, Dugon's Pal, Walking Fish, Fish, Dirt Eater, Chum of Chibo and Chums, Co-Captain Gill of the Riptide Pirates, Co-captain of the Albatross, Companion of Pretzel, Paramount Champion, Knighter of Julian That One Time, Pretzel Carrier, Leviathan Tamer, Serpent Rider, Brother of Dugon, Healer of the Sick, Friend of Duke D Dukem Duke of Dooke, Eater of Grass, Beater of Ass, Grandma's Good Boy, Dismantler of Evil, Eater of Shit, Capitalism Hater, Royalty Assassinator, Sufferer of the Spice, Weed Eater, Slayer of Evil, Loffinlot Liberator, Fruitninja, Eater of Sand, Juice Enjoyer, Rescuer of John, Fishy. Bitcoin Miner, NFT Purchaser, Driplord, Grandmillion, The One Who Will Change The World, Roller of Tens, Grimm Slayer. In Need of a Dad, Goblin Gobbler, Lime Lord, Tuber, Chip's Nightmare Fuel, Monsoon And Moon Son, Eater of Ass, Pretzel Seeker, Vibe Master, Pussy Slayer, Murderer of Vice Admiral Kuba Kenta, Gillion Motherfucking Titty-sucking Tidestrider, Egg Hater, Bong Obliterator, Baby signer, Babygirl, The Red One, Skillion Liedsneaker, Fishy Boy, Tidestrizzer, Rizz Reverent, Jorts Storm, Hero of the Hour, Popper of Sacks, Tree Hugger, Summoner Rider, Brother of Lucy and Gilly-

one without the background effects

[autocorrection]

Sir Gillion Tidestrider, Champion of the Undersea, Hero of the Deep, Pigeon Lord, The One, Warrior of Rock and Roll, Singer/Songwriter of Gillion and the Tidestriders' hit single "The Hole in Your Heart", Moisture Master, Horse Tamer, Defenestrator of the Adulterous, Friend of Dugon, Dugon's Best Friend, Dugon's Pal, Walking Fish, Fish, Dirt Eater, Chum of Chibo and Chums, Co-Captain Gill of the Riptide Pirates, Co-captain of the Albatross, Companion of Pretzel, Paramount Champion, Knighter of Julian That One Time, Pretzel Carrier, Leviathan Tamer, Serpent Rider, Brother of Dugon, Healer of the Sick, Friend of Duke D Dukem Duke of Dooke, Eater of Grass, Beater of Ass, Grandma's Good Boy, Dismantler of Evil, Eater of Shit, Capitalism Hater, Royalty Assassinator, Sufferer of the Spice, Weed Eater, Slayer of Evil, Loffinlot Liberator, Fruitninja, Eater of Sand, Juice Enjoyer, Rescuer of John, Fishy, Bitcoin Miner, NFT Purchaser, Driplord, Grandmillion, The One Who Will Change The World, Roller of Tens, Grimm Slayer, In Need of a Dad, Goblin Gobbler, Lime Lord, Tuber, Chip's Nightmare Fuel, Monsoon And Moon Son, Eater of Ass, Pretzel Seeker, Vibe Master, Pussy Slayer, Murderer of Vice Admiral Kuba Kenta, Gillion Mother-fucking Titty-sucking Tidestrider, Egg Hater, Bong Obliterator, Baby signer, Babygirl, The Red One, Skillion Liedsneaker, Fishy Boy, Tidestrizzer, Rizz Reverent, Jort Storm, Hero of the Hour, Popper of Sacks, Tree Hugger, Summoner Rider, Brother of Lucy and Gilly.

[phantoms-world-and-more]

Danny wonders around the DC

So I want Danny whos fresh out of fucks to give just one day, deciding "I'm too young for this shit" and deciding to become someone else problem

So he packs his shit and just leaves through the portal

He shows up in the DC universe and still be out of fucks to give

So instead he just wonders around

But because Fenton luck strikes again and he just keeps wondering into superhero places

He once got distracted and walked through Mount Justice, realised the place was a lair and just started exploring, he dismantles half the crap he comes across so there are little nuts, bolts, screws and other things constantly around, he walked into the garage and popped the tires on all the vehicles he only left when he accidentally set the kitchen on fire

He walked into the house of mysteries and just started touching stuff, cursing at a few demons imprisoned, replay we johns alcohol with carrot juice because that much alcohol can't be healthy

He woke up in the fortress of solitude, freaked out and blasted the place pretty well, he doesn't regret it and still wonders how he got there

He followed an infint bat back to the bat cave and took the batmobile for a joyride crashed it 5 hours later and then came back to the bat cave to dismantle all the bikes

[bestcadaverinthejujutsumorgue]

the thing about jujutsu kaisen is that it’s a story with a big, hulking, heaving child exploitation machine in the center of it. all of the grownups are well aware it’s there, they matriculated from the damn thing, and even the children are fairly certain something is grinding up their bones for porridge, but no one can stop it so they all just adapt. “how do you react to the child exploitation machine” is in fact one of the defining character questions on the human side. some people, like nanami, take the high road and refuse to enable the machine and always treat the children inside it as if the machine is nonexistent—this is very noble but does nothing to ultimately slow the machine down. lots of adults go “well, i will be a firm but fair authority figure to the children in the child exploitation machine and get them ice cream.” yuki and gojo are very sure they have the juice to ultimately stop the child exploitation machine… but it turns out that bitch is hard to dismantle so they’re left going “hang in there, children! you’re doing great! mommy’s proud of you! i will definitely save, if not you, then one of the next generations of children!”

meanwhile the beast just keeps on chugging.

[cursedslimecicle]

Day 35: Sir Gillion Tidestrider, Champion of the Undersea, Hero of the Deep, Pigeon Lord, The One, Warrior of Rock and Roll, Singer/Songwriter of Gillion and the Tidestriders' hit single "The Hole in Your Heart", Moisture Master, Horse Tamer, Defenestrator of the Adulterous, Friend of Dugon, Dugon's Best Friend, Dugon's Pal, Walking Fish, Fish, Dirt Eater, Chum of Chibo and Chums, Co-Captain Gill of the Riptide Pirates, Co-captain of the Albatross, Companion of Pretzel, Paramount Champion, Knighter of Julian That One Time, Pretzel Carrier, Leviathan Tamer, Serpent Rider, Brother of Dugon, Healer of the Sick, Friend of Duke D Dukem Duke of Dooke, Eater of Grass, Beater of Ass, Grandma's Good Boy, Dismantler of Evil, Eater of Shit, Capitalism Hater, Royalty Assassinator, Sufferer of the Spice, Weed Eater, Slayer of Evil, Loffinlot Liberator, Fruitninja, Eater of Sand, Juice Enjoyer, Rescuer of John, Fishy, Bitcoin Miner, NFT Purchaser, Driplord, Grandmillion, The One Who Will Change The World, Roller of Tens, Grimm Slayer, In Need of a Dad, Goblin Gobbler, Lime Lord, Tuber, Chip's Nightmare Fuel, Monsoon And Moon Son, Eater of Ass, Pretzel Seeker, Vibe Master, Pussy Slayer, Murderer of Vice Admiral Kuba Kenta, Gillion Mother-fucking Titty-sucking Tidestrider, Egg Hater, Bong Obliterator, Baby signer, Babygirl, The Red One, Skillion Liedsneaker, Fishy Boy, Tidestrizzer, Rizz Reverent, Jorts Storm, Hero of the Hour, Popper of Sacks, Tree Hugger, Summoner Rider, Brother of Lucy and Gilly.

[somestardeww]

Kenji x fem!reader

I am thinking abt him and I can't stop, so have fuunn!

reblogs are apreciated :))

oh and be aware, smut under the cut ;)

Absolutely tearing Kenji apart, making him a mess of pathetic, panting moans beneath you as you clamp your pussy around his cock.

Silently thanking for being paired with him to infiltrate the Sector 45 army so you can finally fuck how you want without worrying about some roommate interrupting you both. abusing of your boyfriend's power of invisibility to sneak out with a discretion that the two of you had trained for years to achieve, only to end up tangled up in a mess in some abandoned dorm that the you both maintained.

smiling superiorly at him while the brown-haired one below you could only moan and beg for you with a broken voice that filled you with power and pleasure in equal measures, that could make you cum easily like that, on top of him.

he couldn't stop complaining about how you had already cum several times while just teasing him, not making a point of actually making him cum, poor baby :(

When you hear his complain this last time, you slowly dismantle him, lying on top of him with your hips slightly raised and your two chests pressed together, you leaning almost completely on him, sliding your fingers over your clitoris lightly to prolong the feeling of orgasm while giving him a drunken smile, knowing that it would provoke him.

"don't you think it's enough to make me cum so many times on your dick? Do you have to demand more, being so selfish? I'm spoiling you a lot.." you says while analyzing your boyfriend's features, which soften as he lets out an agonized groan, his dick now pressed between your two legs. He thrusts lightly, chasing the little pleasure it brought as he tried to convince you with a broken voice that he loved making you cum, but that he needed to cum too because he was so sensitive, and oh- how he would cum for you like such a good boy If you would just allow him to continue-

"enough, darling"

You say, turning away from him, ending his begging. He starts to whimper, asking you not to stop right now (he knew you wouldn't really leave him aside, but it was so much more exciting to join the game), and only stops when you fit between his legs, practically on all fours , and holds his dick firmly, taking the entire length into your mouth delicately, drooling and licking the pre-cum and your own juices that were on your boy's dick, who only knew how to moan and be a crying mess for you <3

[brainsawh]

Can you please draw Sir Gillion Tidestrider, Champion of the Undersea, Hero of the Deep, Pigeon Lord, The One, Warrior of Rock and Roll, Singer/Songwriter of Gillion and the Tidestriders' hit single "The Hole in Your Heart", Moisture Master, Horse Tamer, Defenestrator of the Adulterous, Friend of Dugon, Dugon's Best Friend, Dugon's Pal, Walking Fish, Fish, Dirt Eater, Chum of Chibo and Chums, Co-Captain Gill of the Riptide Pirates, Co-captain of the Albatross, Companion of Pretzel, Paramount Champion, Knighter of Julian That One Time, Pretzel Carrier, Leviathan Tamer, Serpent Rider, Brother of Dugon, Healer of the Sick, Friend of Duke D Dukem Duke of Dooke, Eater of Grass, Beater of Ass, Grandma's Good Boy, Dismantler of Evil, Eater of Shit, Capitalism Hater, Royalty Assassinator, Sufferer of the Spice, Weed Eater, Slayer of Evil, Loffinlot Liberator, Fruitninja, Eater of Sand, Juice Enjoyer, Rescuer of John, Fishy, Bitcoin Miner, NFT Purchaser, Driplord, Grandmillion, The One Who Will Change The World, Roller of Tens, Grimm Slayer, In Need of a Dad, Goblin Gobbler, Lime Lord, Tuber, Chip's Nightmare Fuel, Monsoon And Moon Son, Eater of Ass, Pretzel Seeker, Vibe Master, Pussy Slayer, Murderer of Vice Admiral Kuba Kenta, Gillion Mother-fucking Titty-sucking Tidestrider, Egg Hater, Bong Obliterator, Baby signer, Babygirl, The Red One, Skillion Liedsneaker, Fishy Boy, Tidestrizzer, Rizz Reverent, Jorts Storm, Hero of the Hour, Popper of Sacks, Tree Hugger, Summoner Rider, Brother of Lucy and Gilly-?❤️

Im gonna be so honest i had an audible reaction to this ask

[khajiit-spelltome]

Pinterest Boards as Spellcasting Tools / Spell Jars

The main thing to note is that Pinterest has images for basically any tool and ingredient to some degree. Need a ghost pepper? They got pictures. Need canola oil? They got pictures. Need peacock feathers? They got pictures! It's got pictures of ingredients that are hard to acquire, be it due to cost, being out of season, not available in your local area, etc. As witches, we should all be able to adjust our practice to what is available to us, but Pinterest can also work for this.

Okay, how does one do this?

This step is up to your debate, but either make a Pinterest board to serve as a grand shelf of sections for your digital spell jars, or make a board per spell. I prefer the former, personally.

Name your board/section what you want it to do - One I have is named "stay the frick away", to serve as a warding spell jar. It looks like this:

I have black pepper, peacock feathers, olive oil, and ghost peppers in there. The oil contains it all, while the other objects are there for keeping away and warding.

One could also make sigils and upload them to Pinterest if you're comfortable with them being seen/used/saved by others, though I believe there's a way to private pins by only uploading them to secret boards? I don't upload to Pinterest myself, so... I dunno on that one.

What do we do with the board once it's done?

Few suggestions: Say an activation prayer/invocation above it, keep it open on a background app on your phone, keep the board open in a background page on your PC or phone web browser.

If you want to be a bit more ritualistic, you can add candles and/or incense burning videos to the board, before deleting them or exchanging them with melted candles or pictures of ash to represent them having burned down. This is to act out the process of adding power into the spell jar/board.

I prefer the first one, I believe that if I say that it is now active, it being on my Pinterest account makes it active to me for essentially ever until the section is deleted or I say a deactivation prayer/invocation, much like how a spell jar is active until it runs out of juice or is dismantled. But by keeping the app/browser page open, that'd also work for keeping it on your person.

You could also use the images from the board to make a collage that you then print, but that kinda steps a bit away from the purely technowitchcraft aspect.

What about the fact spell jars run out of juice and stop working eventually?

One could remake the board, add more of the same ingredients to the board, or re-pray/invocate an activation over it. I suggest the first one, because the ingredients will run out eventually, and making a new board with intent appears to be the most potent.

If you want to be a bit more ritualistic still, you can repeat the candle/incense trick. This is to act out the process of adding in more power, so they have the ability to continue their job.

One could also just move onto the next step if the spell board did its job.

How does one deactivate it?

Either delete the board/section, or say a deactivation prayer. Deleting the board is more like dismantling, and if you want to do it with a bit more intent, slowly delete every pin or move them into the greater board if you're using sections as an "ingredient" board. Deactivation allows you to keep the board for the future, but this might not fit your preferences.

As always I provide my suggestion, which is to slowly dismantle the board and ultimately delete the section. If I need the jar still, I just re-create it afterwards.

Conclusion

If you'd like, order them in a way that feels right for the board - Such as bowls for money bowls as the bottom-most image, to "hold" all the other items.

Technowitchcraft is great for many reasons, including the cost effectiveness, versatility, and ease of access. So I wanted to contribute to the process a bit, by making this.

Happy casting!

[najia-cooks]

فخارة العدس / Fukharat l'adas (Palestinian clay-pot lentils)

The name of this dish comes from "فَخَّار" ("fakhar"), meaning "pottery," and "عَدَس" ("'adas"), meaning "lentils." It is traditionally cooked in a قدرة ("qedra," clay pot) made from clay refined from local soil and shaped in family-owned pottery workshops. This type of pot is also used to make a lamb and rice dish of the same name commonly eaten in Gaza and Hebron. The qedra is filled with the cooking ingredients, sealed with a flour-water paste or with aluminum foil, and placed in a wood-fired oven—or buried in an earth oven—to cook for several hours, or even overnight.

This simple dish cooks red lentils with yellow onion, olive oil, and cumin to produce a smooth, earthy stew; additional olive oil and fresh lemon juice squeezed on after cooking add freshness and a tart lift, and شطة (shatta, red chili paste) is spooned in for heat.

As of 2019, the number of families producing qedra in Gaza had decreased from 40 or 50 to 3 or 4, according to workshop owner Sabri Attallah. The Israeli blockade which began in 2007 closed off foreign markets for Palestinian qedras, while cheaper, metal imports cut in on the local market. When the pots are exported to Israel, the multiple checkpoints and mandatory searches between Gaza and Israel cause many of them to break. The compression of Palestinians into small areas by Israeli government and settlers also spells problems for the qedra industry, as the smoke caused by firing pots reduces air quality for nearby residents. Many consider pottery-making to be both an integral part of Palestinian identity, and to be dying out: thus the targeting of Palestinians' economic self-determination targets cuisine and culture as well.

Today, Israeli weapons threaten Palestinian existence. Palestine Action has called for bail fund donations to aid in their storming, occupying, shutting down, and dismantling of factories and offices owned by Israeli arms manufacturer Elbit Systems.

For the lentils:

1 cup split red lentils, rinsed

1 yellow onion, chopped

3 Tbsp olive oil

1 tsp cumin seeds, toasted and ground

Salt, to taste

About 3 cups water

For the shatta (شطة):

100g (about 1 cup) fresh red chili peppers

2 tsp table salt

2 Tbsp olive oil

To serve:

Olive oil

Juice of 1/2 lemon, or to taste

Sweet peppers, radishes, spring onions, pickles, olives, leafy greens, shatta (red chili pepper paste).

Instructions:

For the shatta:

1. Wash peppers and remove stems. Use a mortar and pestle, food processor, or potato ricer to reduce peppers to a paste.

2. Add salt and stir. Add olive oil and stir. Store extra shatta in a jar in the fridge; cover with a thin layer of olive oil to avoid spoiling.

For the lentils (in the oven):

1. Coat the inside a piece of clay cookware of sufficient size, such as a Palestinian qedra or a Moroccan tanjia or tajine, with olive oil. Add the rest of the ingredients, followed by enough water to cover the lentils by at least an inch (about 3 cups). Make sure that the opening of the pot is completely covered (e.g. with a layer of aluminum foil, and then the pot's lid).

2. Place the clay pot in your oven and then heat it to 500 °F (260 °C).

3. Reduce the heat to 150 °F (65 °C) and cook for 2-3 hours, until lentils are mushy.

For the lentils (on the stovetop):

1. Heat olive oil in the base of your clay cookware, or a large pot. Add onions and cumin and fry briefly.

2. Add water and lentils and cook, stirring occasionally, for 10 minutes on medium.

3. Lower heat to low and cook for another 30 minutes, until consistency is smooth and mushy. Add water as necessary.

To serve:

Transfer lentils to individual serving bowls. Top with lemon juice and olive oil. Serve alongside shatta (which you may choose to spoon into your bowl) and fresh vegetables.

[why-not-jane]

Twice Chosen

Harry Potter kindly offers to mentor the newest chosen one, an eleven year old reincarnated King Arthur.

But kings don't have mentors.

They have advisors.

And accepting advice is always optional.

__________________________________________

Privately, Harry thought that prophecy spheres, particularly those involving children, should be encased in concrete and sunk in the Black Lake, like how a muggle mob boss would disappear an inconvenient reporter.

Not so privately, Hermoine agreed. At length, and in several strongly worded recommendations filed the with Department of Mysteries. Eventually, it had taken a back seat to her S.P.E.W. campaign, which the Department of Mysteries was probably as grateful for as the Department of Magical Creatures was not.

Luckily for both, the full force of Hermoine Granger was currently debating a government official who had never heard of the war hero or the war she’d fought in and was refusing to give her an ounce of respect.

That left Harry to deal with the official’s son.

He had struggled to live up to the title of The Boy Who Lived. So the eleven year old son of the muggle Prime Minister who’d been unwittingly crowned Once and Future King had his full sympathy.

“I’m supposed to be one of these magical people, then?” the eleven-year-old looked up at him from his newly received Hogwarts letter, piercing blue eyes staring shrewdly at the saviour of the wizarding world.

Sat in a leather armchair in the drawing room of Number 10 Downing Street, the child looked better suited to dismantling labour unions than drinking pumpkin juice in the Hogwarts dining hall. Harry bit back a smile. In his experience, solemn little boys proclaimed to be chosen ones did not remain solemn into their teenaged years.

“A wizard,” Harry acknowledged, and the boy thoughtfully tilted his head.

“Does this have anything to do with that Once and Future King business?”

Harry’s brain came to a standstill. While he’d always intended to broach the prophecy with the boy (like hell Harry would let him be the last to know of his own destiny) he hadn’t expected the muggle-born to come pre-informed.

“Yeah,” Harry admitted, leaning forward to put his elbows on his knees, “How do you know about that?”

“A lady in a pond in Cardiff mentioned it when I was eight,” he answered primly. “Father sent me to find the golf ball he’d fired into the water hazard.”

Harry suddenly wished Hermoine were in here with them, instead of across the hall with Shacklebolt and an irate muggle prime minister. At least then he’d have someone far smarter than him to share in his gobsmacked expression.

“What else did this lady say?”

The boy shrugged. “That Merlin and I are to reunite Albion. And I’m the reincarnation of King Arthur.”

He tilted his chin proudly in way Harry could only assume he’d been taught for photo opportunities. The image of an oversized golden crown balancing precariously on his small head jumped to Harry’s mind. “You don’t seem surprised,” he noted.

The boy shrugged again. “A portrait at Buckingham said the same thing. And the dragon in the Lake District,” the boy shivered. “But the lady in the pond was the nicest.”

No dragon Harry knew of talked, but those he had met didn’t seem like they’d be the kindest of creatures. He made a mental note to follow up back at the office, as he was fairly certain the Lake District did not have a designated dragon reserve, and if there was such a thing as talking dragons, they must surely have a responsibility to uphold the Statute of Secrecy.

The boy suddenly slid forward in his chair, leather squeaking. “When do I meet Merlin?” he asked eagerly. “

Idly tapping on the end of his wand sticking out slightly of his palm holster, it was Harry’s turn to shrug, “Whenever we find him, I suppose.”

That was truly the crux of the matter. Few in the wizarding world cared for the legend of King Arthur, the knights of the round table, or the holy grail. What mattered was what their rebirth signified; the return of the greatest wizard who ever lived.

But eleven years later, the Prince of Enchanters was notably absent.

The boy crossed his arms and slouched back in his armchair with a thud. Briefly, Harry recognised his cousin in the brattish set of his lip, and immediately swore to himself he’d never tell Dudley that he shared any similarities with a king of legend, flattering or otherwise.

Clearly unhappy with Harry’s non-committal answer, the boy asked, “What about this threat we’re supposed to face together?”

“Erm,” Harry paused, having been trying not to think about that for the last eleven years. Something worse than Voldemort and company really didn’t bear dwelling on.

“So if you can’t tell me what I’m up against, or where my Merlin is, what use are you?”

More and more like Dudley by the minute.

“I gave you your Hogwarts letter,” Harry said indignantly, then swallowed the rest of his rising irritation. Losing his temper at the boy he’d offered to mentor really wasn’t going to endear himself to anyone. And Hermoine would be mortified.

Gently, he continued, “and believe me, prophecies should never be dealt with alone.”

“But I won’t be alone,” the boy replied with the kind of certainty one can only be born with, “I’ll have Merlin.”

The growing feeling that it was he who was out of depth in this conversation, rather than the muggle born boy, was sinking rapidly into Harry’s chest.

The wooden doors swung open to reveal an austere looking Uther Pendragon marching through the door in black wingtip shoes and a finely tailored grey suit. With his grey hair and eyes, the muggle minister was the picture of monochromatic stoicism. Not at all like the eggplant-coloured man who had tried to throw a fourteenth-century Ming Dynasty vase at Shacklebolt an hour earlier.

“Arthur,” the Prime Minister kept his voice intentionally level, Hermoine and Kingsley following behind him, “As you have been informed of your… abilities, Ms Granger and Mr Potter here will take you to get supplies for,” he looked down at the parchment letter he held and sneered slightly at the Hogwarts crest clearly blazoned, “school.”

Hermoine gave Uther the same look the prime minister gave the Hogwarts letter. Shacklebolt and Harry shared a grimace.

Uther’s son nodded dutifully.

His father continued, “I’m sure I don’t need to remind you that despite the differences in academic curricula, you will live up to the family name.”

Harry held back a wince at that. While the wizarding legends of Camelot were just as wild and inconsistent as their muggle counterparts, they suggested that the Pendragon name left a mixed legacy to uphold.

The afternoon sun decided at that moment to shoot through the windowpane behind the boy, lighting up his golden hair in harsh symbolism, even as the drifting dust motes sung of lost magic in the air.

“Of course, Father,” said Arthur Pendragon.

Continue reading Ch1-3 at link below

https://archiveofourown.org/works/61141312/chapters/156227881#main