#dill gets real for a minute

[peridotthesoft]

New Year, Old Resolutions

Content warning: discussion of weight loss, self-harm, a millennial with art degrees.

I often have ambitious goals when a new year rolls around. There’s often a tremendous list of things;

Loose 10st,

Travel to Japan solo,

Find and implement the cure for sadness,

Become fluent in another language in record breaking time,

Win the Turner Prize,

Find the love of my life

and so on.

For an unemployed Autistic person who hovers around the poverty line, these kinds of goals are unrealistic and ultimately extremely unhelpful. By January 15th I’m miserable and in bed eating my weight in discounted Christmas chocolates, renaming my savings account from “Travel Savings!” to “420 Money”.

Over the last few years, my new year resolutions are very often variations of the same concepts. Improve the body, improve the mind, improve social prowess. I think it’s safe to say that these might be fairly universal goals. Almost everyone I’ve talked to this year has had the same targets. We all want to be a little better, a little stronger, a little better put together. While there are very valid reasons to want to change yourself I think we’re so heavily encouraged to be dissatisfied with ourselves because unhappy people spend more money. Capitalism thrives on the general populous being down on themselves. Happiness is bad for the markets. In January there are so many targeted adverts for products, services and subscriptions that will “help you achieve your goals!” but… will they help?

The overall theme of my goals for 2025 is happiness. I want to shrug off the coat of gloom I’ve gotten comfortable in.

One of my personal goals for 2025 is one that is a little tricky to talk about. I want to loose weight. My current BMI* is dancing between 38-41. As someone who was raised around mostly women, weight was always the main topic of discussion. Fad diets, extreme exercise plans, gossip rags littered coffee tables that circled celebrity cellulite. There always seems to be another purchase available that will make me fit, toned and beach ready! Meal plans to take the thinking out! Protein shakes specially made to make you hungry an hour later! Weight Loss club to be gently bullied into buying branded foods. Gym memberships that change price after three months. Personal trainers who aren’t educated about disability. Apps that are totally free! (All they require is your location, details, access to your contacts, data and storage. Don’t worry about it.) Managing weight loss in a weight loss obsessed world is so hard. I do not think fatness is a bad thing. It is completely possible to be a healthy fat person. Most fat people are as healthy as the next average sized person. Especially in Queer communities, fatness is becoming acceptable and isn’t an issue in dating. Fatness has become a symbol of self-love for many people, a way of defying oppressive demands of the body and embracing comfort. For me however, fatness is where I store stress. To cut a very long sad story short, I struggled with understanding myself as a kid and as an adult it led to over analysis of the self. This most notably manifested as self-harm. Amongst more violent methods, I developed a very strained relationship with food. The core idea was this: I don’t know what to do or say > I can’t talk if my mouth is full > the bigger I am, the less social prowess is expected of me. I hide inside of my body. It’s armour, thick padding that protects me from the world. I’ve spent a lot of time last year digging into the actual science around food and nutrition. I’m going to focus more on building up my physical strength and stamina without focusing too intently on the scales. I am by no means an expert and habits are exceedingly hard to change but I’m feeling ready to try. No purchase required.

The second key goal (don’t worry, I’m not going to take you through a full list of resolutions) is to level up my skills. Something I don’t like talking about too much is that I have 2 degrees. A BA in Fine Art and an MA in Art and Design. I’m not keen on chatting about them because I never did anything with them. I didn’t make any connections and most embarrassing of all I can’t draw very well. The first thing people say when they learn that I’m technically an artist is something along the lines of “Oh that’s amazing! I can’t even draw a stickman!”. Well…. Me either. I spent four or five years hyper-focused on painting self portraits. I can draw my own face, literally with my eyes closed. But I can’t draw my cat. Or a house. Or the rest of my body very well. Fun fact, the arts curriculum in England doesn’t actually require students to be taught technical skills on a Fine Art course. I went and paid externally for life drawing classes. I can talk your ear off until you beg for mercy about the history or art, about the importance of context and specifically about the history of self-portraiture in any medium. But I can't draw you a sick tattoo of Shrek. Unless you’re seeking a gruesome acrylic painting of my face looking particularly fed up, I’m not your guy. In the last year or so the intensity of my interest in making self-portraits has calmed down. I’ve been considering branching out. I’m extremely lucky to have space at home dedicated to making art and crafting. The last year, having been a particularly upsetting one for personal reasons, has meant I’ve used my studio for playing Bloons Tower Defence and not much else. But next year, I’m going to expand my current set of skills and share my work more. I’m going to tune up my technical skills as well as broaden my horizons and try new things. Having a passion is important to me, I’m an enthusiastic person. With nothing to turn that enthusiasm to I get extra uncomfortably weird. I think having a hobby is important for a person's wellbeing. Having an interest that is just for you, that doesn’t require money and that helps the time pass is a major contender in improving mental health. While fancy art supplies can be outrageously expensive, doodling on the back of an envelope isn’t. I’m someone who likes to express themselves in tangible, visible ways. It’s an enjoyable way to work out my feelings and frustrations without bothering anyone else. I struggle sometimes to know what it is I’m feeling and making some art is a fantastic way to muddle through and work out where I’m at. I’m a crafty guy, a home improvement cowboy and hopefully by the end of next year, an artist with a slightly less embarrassing body of work.

If you have new year resolutions, I wish you the best of luck with them. Any progress you make is more than you had before. If you don’t succeed with your resolutions, relax! It wasn’t meant to happen - maybe you need to approach your goals from a different angle or adjust the end goal to something more manageable. If your goals require you to spend a lot of money or to do something that makes you miserable, sit and have a think about if/why those goals are important to you.

If you don’t have new year resolutions, fantastic! Approach the new year with fresh eyes and optimism. It’s a whole new year and what it has in store for you will be unfolded over time.

*BMI is an inaccurate and harmful way to measure someone's health - it doesn't account for muscle or breast tissue and is built using male Caucasian measurements as its base which makes it wildly unreliable for non-male, non-White people. The guy who invented BMI literally is the cornerstone of eugenics.

I have a blog that I very half-heartedly keep up with here: [X]

[bellpeppre]

some tbosas modern au headcanons, mostly just the pack tbh, some of them are ooc but uh… shush

gonna be real with u, some of the headcanons r like partially stolen from other ppls fanfics or posts that ive read so if u see something on this list that u came up with plz dont be angry or anything i just stole it cuz it was cool💔

family headcanons🎉

——————————

coral and mizzen r half siblings with the same dad, mizzen lives with coral, her mom, and their dad bc his mom is dead 🎀 mizzen has a cat that he’s keeping secret from their parents, gee sure this wont turn out to be a big disaster in one of the fics im writing

dill and reaper r cousins, they live in the same house bc reapers mother wouldn’t let him come back to live with her after he got out of juvie or something i haven’t put too much thought into this, other than them the people in the household r their grandparents, dills parents, and dills older siblings, as well as two dogs

treech lives with his parents, grandmother, and his siblings, hes the middle child tragically. dont have a whole lot of thought put into this one ngl, i dont think about treech very much

lamina lives next door to treech, she lives with her dad, and like three cats, her mom died when she was younger and her relationship with her dad is pretty strained since

tanner and brandy r twins, brandy’s older, they have two younger sisters, their parents should definitely be divorced but they won’t fsr. on their farm they have a few chickens, a herd of cows, and two horses

lucy gray obvs lives with the covey, her parents r still dead tho I’m not sure quite what killed them in this universe but its not that important. idk if they have confirmed ages but i made barb azure the oldest. barb azures gf is over to their home so frequently that she doesn’t even bother knocking b4 coming in

teslee lives with her mother, and two older siblings, she took over the garage for her projects, one time her sibling tried to park their car in the garage and she screamed at them for thirty minutes bc they knocked over one of her drones 🎀

circ is teslees cousin, he lives with his parents and siblings, two older, one younger, also haven’t put a whole lot of thought into him and teslee bc i only recently realized how silly they were 💔

bobbin and wovey r cousins, wovey and her older brother moved in with bobbin and his parents after their parents died. bobbin takes his job of protecting his little cousin at school very seriously, they’re very close

alrighttt i haven’t thought about any of the other tributes enough so we’re gonna move on to regular various headcanons 🫶

————————————

coral needs glasses to read bc shes farsighted (whattt me? projecting? nooo never)

lamina always wanted a little sibling but never got one so she borrows corals 🫶 mizzen doesn’t mind being assigned a second older sister except for when lamina tries to get him to let her do his makeup (a well placed bribe of candy can convince him to let her on occasion, treech saved a picture for blackmail 🎀)

the pack as a friend group includes lamina and brandy, lamina and coral get along pretty well in this universe

if mizzen decides you have wronged him he will never forget about it, he still brings up the time treech accidentally hit him in the face with a door like four years later

teslee, dill, and circ have been friends since elementary school, they haven’t been in any classes together since sixth grade tho bc teslee and circ r both in advanced classes and dill is in remedial english bc of her undiagnosed dyslexia

mizzen is a weird kid, he’s been bullied pretty much since he started going to school, this leads him to get in a fights, which is why he was expelled from his first middle school 🎀

dill and mizzen have remedial english together bc both of them r dyslexic

sejanus’s ma teaches english and remedial english at their school

coral is the captain of her schools swim team

reaper and coral aren’t exactly friends but if they run into each other they’ll chat

mizzen and dill both thought the other hated them when they first met

cc takes orchestra a bit too seriously, if he hears u refer to a viola as a violin or something he may jump u

bobbin is in robotics with circ which is how they met, bobbin was once asked to sit out of a robotics competition bc he was too competitive and started swearing at the other team when they accidentally broke off a piece of his teams robot

teslee is in advanced english with cc, cc loves creative writing and teslee likes analyzing books. teslee and cc are friends but that all goes out the window when it comes to their grade in this class, teslee gets very upset when he gets a better grade than her on an assignment and cc has that little brother tendency to tease her when this happens. they aren’t allowed to sit beside each other anymore

mizzen and teslee have beef but they have to tolerate each other bc they’re both close friends with dill

coral has mommy issues bc her mom’s lowkey a narcissist and refuses to get therapy for the generational trauma shes passing on to coral and mizzen 🎀

brandy is the fastest to crash out when someones bothering her, if she doesn’t like you she will make sure yk and she will start throwing hands with no warning

teslee secured an internship with beetee for during her freshman year next year and she won’t stop talking about it

mizzen doesn’t believe in sunscreen

reaper loves painting flowers, he keeps his watercolor palette on his person at all times

the pack all borrow each others clothes

coral had a huge crush on persephone at one point but she never said anything and their friendship started to fade

mizzen does NOT know how to care for himself, his skin is sun damaged, his lips are perpetually cracked, his hair is outrageously dry from how much time he spends in salt water

coral is a barista

dill and reapers family are the caretakers for a graveyard, they live in a house in the graveyard and reaper helps to dig the graves, dill’s embarrassed of living in a grave yard and has never invited anyone to her house b4

wovey likes making friendship bracelets, all of her friends have at least four bracelets by this point

dill’s that one friend whos out of school sick like every other week, one time she had to be hospitalized and mizzen skipped school to come hang out with her

bobbin likes sewing, he makes outfits for mizzens cat sometimes

mizzen has braces

i have more but i can’t remember them so i may reblog this with more later, hope u enjoyed :3

[teddybearsandspaceships]

Notes for another Cleo stream, this one from April Fools. (Cleo has been uploading VODs again \o/ so it will probably be available on Youtube soon! Still available on Twitch here.) Featuring Real Life talk and permit office shenanigans with Grian, Scar, Etho, and Pearl.

Cleo reads out a message congratulating them on the Real Life win only a minute into the stream [making life hard for the mods, who pin a message not to talk about spoilers, as usual ^^]

Cleo´s opinion on if their win is canon: “Why wouldn´t it be real? Why wouldn´t it be?” The test, going by TV series rules: if the special gets mentioned in a later episode it´s canon.

They discovered the allays having coffee at the kitty café that False put there :D

Apparently the group was initially concerned if people would be mad, but they were still making content. The “April Fools” part was just that it was a one-off.

In-game chat: Grian announces the permit office is open. Special opening hours for April 1st! Pearl and Cleo are immediately suspicious and say it sounds like a trap. Joel says that Grian is actually nice to day (but on midnight he turns back into a nightmare.) Cleo is not at all convinced.

About Real Life: ~"the first thing everybody did was wave to each other, and dance, and give hugs, and I think that says a lot"

Pearl apparently had a 0/10 experience at the permit office. The permit office is closed again. nobody is surprised.

After the recording, Scar mentioned that he was told he should get a lap belt too… Scar is not Scar-safe. Cleo is frequently concerned/worried about Scar, which is only appropriate. "I´m not worried he´s gonna hurt himself, I´m worried he´s gonna, just, tear down the fabric of society.” "He´s a special little sausage, and also needs poking with sticks on a regular basis. Like big sticks – not little sticks, massive, massive sticks."

ooh apparently three glass permits are up for grabs! Grian, Scar, Cleo, Etho, and Pearl have a discussion in front of the permit office. Very soon this involves talking about loopholes to the permit office rules, but Grian tells them to stop it, he will just make up more rules. Pearl says she might be an NPC, Cleo says AI is not that advanced. Scar has skins, hats, and plans for him and Skizz has permit enforcers, but no spoilers

They looked at the permit office and the backrooms, listened to some unsettling music, and then started talking about cooking (more specifically Scar started talking about his meat. That he cooked, as Etho was glad to hear him clarify.) Grian thinks Etho would eat grey sludge nutrition paste.

Etho´s daily sandwich: a foot-long baguette, provelone cheese, hungarian salami, lettuce, tomatoes, salt and pepper, balsamic vinegar-based dressing. With dill pickles on the side. Grian calls it the most gourmet sandwich. "The more I learn the more I both admire and get confused.” Etho doesn´t understand the big deal [tbh neither do I? It´s a sandwich.] Scar says it´s because of how mysterious Etho is. Etho considers dramatizing everything part of the job as a youtuber.

"being tortured by Grian is fun, right? Right?" - Cleo

What would be Cleo´s mission if someone had created her? Pearl: to burn things down? Cleo asked if she´s burned down things recently. Etho: "She´s a trap door flipper."

repeated discussions about if Pearl is an AI or not

"you don´t have to be an NPC if you don´t want to, you can break your programming" - killing Cleo, however, would not be unexpected. Pearl has already stabbed her in the heart repeatedly. Not in Real Life! They were together that series. [Is it just me or does Pearl´s “yeeah…” sound a little more hesitant ^^]

Bonus: Cleo contemplates stealing cOW

[lexisnotasimp]

Welcome home movie idea!

Note: It would be placed in 2010

Main Character: Blaye dills. She is a 10 year old girl with brown hair and blue eyes.

Blaye just moved into a neighborhood in Texas.

She is lonely since all the people living there are older people. Blaye's parents moved in because it was cheap, which is suspicious to Blaye. As Blaye unpacks her stuff into her room, she sees a dresser with an old tv on it. She thought, "Maybe the last people gave it as a gift for us.. Or mom and dad bought it, and I didn't know...." Then she looked through the drawers and found some cassettes that say: "Welcome Home" on it. Blaye was confused, so she put the cassettes on her bed.

Time skip a day later:

Blaye was just chilling and decided to search up the show that was labeled on the cassettes. She found a website all about it. She was amused and decided to look through it.

She looked at it for a while and then decided the next day while her parents were gone, she would look at it.

Time skip another day later:

Blaye's parents left her home alone for the whole 24 hours since it was a safe neighborhood, and they were going to a one day hotel stay. Blaye was watching tv, eating, and doing normal stuff. Then she decided to watch the cassettes. She put the cassettes in the player on the old tv. She saw the show introducing the main characters in the theme song. Wally Darling, Howdy Pillar, Eddie Dear, Poppy Partridge, Sally Starlight, Barnaby B. Beagle, Frank Frankly, Julie Joyful, and home. The whole episode had parts with the characters (like crafts with Eddie, shows with Sally, Ect.). Blaye was so intrigued, so she watched more. Then she got a text from her mom saying, "Me and your dad are staying a second day hun. Please be safe." Blaye then sighed, It was obvious her parents didn't care for her that much. So she kept watching the episodes. The weird part is that every episode it gets more fuzzy. Blaye just brushed it off, though, because she was certain it's because they are just old.

1 hour time skip:

Blaye went into the basement to get paint to pant a drawing. And then she saw something weird. It was the real puppet of the Mailman from Welcome Home: Eddie Dear. Blaye saw that it had dirt all over it and looked old. She then picked it up, and Eddie Dear stared at her as he said, "Stop playing the tapes...". Blaye was shocked, so she threw it on the ground in fear. Blaye then brushed it off as a hallucination.

1 day time skip:

It was 11:00 pm and the next day her parents were coming back. She kept watching the tapes and she saw one that was named "Homeworming". Blaye turned it on. She watched the whole 22 minutes (insert her watching the awayfrompryingeyes.net video). She was so scared at the part where Eddie was in fear that she turned it off. Blaye then heard talking outside. She walked outside and saw that she was in the Welcome Home neighborhood. She knew she was not sleeping because it hurt when she pinched herself. Then Eddie Dear the mailman grabbed her and went into her house with her. He then said, "I told you not to watch anymore of the tapes!!! It's dangerous.. Stay in your house with me.." Blaye was in fear and started crying. Eddie hugged her. "As long as Wally ain't here, we will be fine.." Wally then comes in.. "Hello, Neighbors.. It's nice to meet this new face.." Wally says,"Go away!" Eddie says in anger

Wally then snaps his finger, and they appear in a dark room.

"No! No!" Eddie screams. Blaye then curls up in fear. The room goes dark, and Eddie screams in pain... The room lights turn back on, and Eddie's legs are missing... Blaye screams in shock. "I'm okay, kiddo... I'm just a puppet. A sentient one.." Blaye sighs and keeps crying. Eddie pats her head. "It will be okay, kid.. I hope.." Eddie says. Then Wally comes in with a knife. Eddie stands in front of Blaye. "MAKE A RUN FOR IT!!!!!" Eddie says as Blaye then runs out, and Wally chases her. "Get back, neighbor!!!" Wally says manically. Blaye then runs into her house, and just before Wally can kill her, she turns off the tape, and then Wally dissolves into nothingness. Blaye looks out her window and sighs in relief when she sees her normal neighborhood out the window. Blaye immediately hides the tapes back in the drawer. She then rushes to the basement and sees the Eddie Dear puppet.

"Keep me in a box in your closet, and when you ever want to watch those tapes again, please tell me first!!! I can tell you how to watch them without getting transported to Home.." Eddie says in a calm but firm tone.

"You're actually alive!!!" Blaye says.

"I've always been.. When you saw me get hurt, that was a hallucination.. But home is a real place.. you were transported to another world.." Eddie says.

Blaye then puts him in a box and takes him to her room.

"Untill your parents come back just keep me on the bed so I can protect you if Wally somehow gets out..." Eddie says looking at her.

A day later:

Blaye's parents come back and Blaye hugs them but her parents obviously don't care about her. Blaye goes back to her room, sighing. She puts the puppet of Eddie Dear in the box and puts him in the closet.

The end.

[runningfrom2am]

1. coryo’s reaction at the the beginning is very real. “i thought we were over this.”

2. r trying to get jessup to the open grave reaper organised is everything to me. she deserves all the hugs.

3. her being closest to the person she was when she left district 12, while offering her life in exchange for a few words feels she is trying to hold onto her identity.

4. “My heart was heavy, for its trust had been / Abused, its kindness answered with foul wrong;” there is no way she doesn’t remember the first two lines of this poem but that part is personal and she gets to keep it.

5. not gonna lie, coral made me laugh there. imagine you’re fighting to death and there’s a girl who conveys her every thought through poems.

6. how i love reaper, honestly. he genuinely might be the best of them. it would be horrible if he were to be hit by the drones.

7. “What would be the use in helping her now?” oh, the reality and the corruption it brings.

8. SHE SMILED AT CORAL!! this might be the “death” of our “juliet”, i wonder when will “romeo” “die”.

9. coryo finally seems to have learned how to twist the truth, good for him!

10. TAKE THE GIRL OUT OF THERE! it’s horrible enough to have experienced all of that but to spend a night at the same spot with only guilt to keep company is terrifying.

11. wondering if coryo regrets what he did because she has done things that she isn’t proud of, empathy might become the very thing that keeps her sane. also i think this is the first time she called him coriolanus, internally.

12. her look on everything is being challenged, from her morals to her love. this actually made me cry.

13. is coryo not going to be exiled? with the compact seemingly unnoticed and the note having an explanation to exist there, maybe he gets away.

this one is long y’all- strap in

1. literally lol- he’s like “damn i JUST find out you’re still alive and you’re giving up??”

2. ugh yeah 🥺 and he deserved it too like i literally think she saw no other options. she was sure getting him there would cost her her life and it was worth it.

3. yes this!! i think she had a few minutes of clarity almost- where later on she thinks ab how the “old her” is just a voice in the back of her mind it’s really not! only when her life is threatened not on her terms does she really stray from that relentless empathy that really makes her who she is.

4. yuppp you get it you get it.

5. NO LITERALLY like if i was coral i wouldn’t have patience for that either like i do get it hahaha

6. REAPERRRR he deserved so much better and i LOVED his character especially in the book. he’s so complex and i do honestly think he’s quite similar to r, but he just put up this show that he was a threat and she never made that attempt. all he wanted was to protect dill. i’ll cry for him forever.

7. YUP. i feel like she doesn’t even want to think that way or even necessarily believe what she’s thinking but she doesn’t have time for second-thoughts and is constantly almost in this battle with her mind and her body where she wants to do the “right” thing but her body is doing what it can to protect and save itself before she can think of repercussions. that would be SO incredibly confusing and scary to deal with so her mind almost has to “pretend” to play along to protect itself. (if this makes any sense at all.) i just mean that the more “dark” less characteristically accurate thoughts she is having feel almost performative, she has to trick herself into it so she doesn’t feel as guilty. (this doesn’t work.)

8. now as we go on in the chapter my last point starts to get very blurry. because a smile, a comment like that, literally mocking coral in her last moments are so unlike r that it’s shocking. like you said, the death of juliet, in a sense. so how much of that is genuinely what she is feeling, and how much is what she thinks she should be feeling? she comes across as kind, gentle, even naive, but this interaction makes it obvious that she has never seen coral in much of a positive light- especially after the games started. so maybe she saw no consequence in getting at least one jab in at her, but she does regret this later when that clarity comes back.

9. lol yeah he ATE. (in this one i needed him to have his “i’m just sending water” moment and this was it lol)

10. no LITERALLY like dr. gaul knew damn well those boys in the vents were dead even if she thought it was by the snakes. it feels almost more like a test for coryo than for her, though it is a cruel punishment to just leave her like that.

11. i’m so glad you get it, like this girl bleeds empathy. i think leaving her overnight wasn’t meant to force her to dwell on what she had done, because according to the cameras, she really hadn’t done anything. i think that’s what made it so hard, too. no one knew what she had done besides herself. she doesn’t know or care if anyone besides coryo is still watching by the time she pulls out the compact, intent on taking her own life whether she realizes consciously that’s what she wants or not, and then when he takes that from her she confesses. as far as she knows, she’s confessing to the world bc she really couldn’t live with herself otherwise. she’s just lucky that he happens to be the only one there. she’s lucky, but she doesn’t care.

ALSO the coriolanus thing,, yup. she was VERY quick at the beginning to separate him from his name. as soon as she found out his nickname she clung to it and really decided that he was coryo, not coriolanus. that line is so blurred by now that she doesn’t know who he is anymore.

12. me too 🥺 my heart breaks for her because even if she did technically “cheat”, she didn’t do anything wrong. she was so much more harmless than almost all of the others, she tried her best to stay that way but she just couldn’t.

13. i mean… as long as no one looks over the footage of what happened that night and early in the morning he should be fine 😬

[morimess]

I just watched The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes and I have to rant about it real quick.

Spoilers under the cut for those who want to see it- I HIGHLY recommend the movie btw.

-So, first off THE MUSIC IS SPECTACULAR. The scene where Lucy Gray is covered in the snakes is *chef's kiss*. Apparently for every song, it was a live performance by Rachel Ziegler, and she fucking nailed it.

I've seen a couple people criticize some of the songs as taking melodies from other IRL folk songs- but honestly, I don't see this as a bad thing as a lot of those original songs have probably been forgotten as this is YEARS in the future. Music evolves, and certain chords and beats will stay long after words are forgotten.

-Her dress is gorgeous- all of the costumes are awesome. I think I made one comment on how the school uniform looks a bit weird, but I quickly got over it.

-Flickerman is actually really funny- I thought he would be annoying as a bit character- but he did get a couple laughs out of me. (Which makes me feel bad because people were dying in those scenes, but at the same time- I think that's a commentary for another time.)

-Arachne's death was absolutely deserved.

-Wovey's death was absolutely tragic

-The drones were *menaces* and I LOVED IT- it was so fucking funny to me to see them flying around and nailing people square in the chest- or knocking people tf over.

-I love how Lucy Gray immediately called bull on Snow's "the third person I killed was my old self."

-THE OLD HOB WAS AWESOME!! The mood in the tavern was so cozy and joyful, and it is EXACTLY what I imagined the Hadestown speakeasy looks like when Persephone is singing "Our Lady of the Underground"

-That being said- I wish we got the scene where they burn it down for being the heart of rebellion.

-I didn't like the change they made to Jessup's rabies. He was supposed to get it while at the capital. That bite was supposed to be after their first night in the zoo, where they thought a rat bit him (later speculated to be a raccoon). I don't like how it was changed to a bat bite while on the train.

The whole point of it in the book was supposed to emphasize the propaganda that's even being forced onto capital citizens- not just district citizens- that the capital is utopian.

"There is no rabies in the capital anymore- we got rid of it within *our* borders. It must have come from those *filthy* districts. Look at how it turns him even more *animalistic.*"

But instead, they change the bite to be from a bat while they were on the train. To me, that seems too close to "the rabies came from the districts." (Even if it was a capital train.)

Like, at the start of the movie, we are treated to an absolute rollercoaster as they try to set up everything that was going wrong in the capital during the war in the span of 5 minutes. One of these being a dog who's foaming at the mouth. I entirely expected that bite to happen within the zoo with that kind of set up.

There could have even been really interesting pay-off for it too. Other students seeing the foaming, freaking out, and almost panicking because "rabies is back." (Hell, even have Flickerman seem spooked by it). SELL HOW DANGEROUS THIS DISEASE IS/ SEEMS TO THEM. Because they lived through it. Most people in the capital probably have a horror story involved with a rabies encounter, because of how rampant it apparently was in the capital.

-The same can also be said about Dill- I don't like how blaise they were about her constant cough, and possible tuberculosis. That shit kills- they would not be casual about being near her. (Though the absolutely would make jokes in her expense)

-Reaper could have been more of a dick. In book, he actually says "I'm sorry I'm going to have to kill you all." (In response Jessup spits in his face- which causes Reaper to ALSO contract rabies, but that's neither here nor there). He honestly isn't too threatening other than a quick jump scare when his mentor is first talking to him.

He's honestly more of a gentle giant? In a way? Like, he pairs with Dill and after she dies, collects all the bodies around the arena in a row and covers them. He isn't the same threat that he was in the books.

-I would have preferred if we went in the arena with a count of how many tributes were left. I think 22 were still alive? But it was really hard to keep track. I know in the book between the rough handling, the Arachne incident, and the bombing- both the mentor and tribute pool slimmed significantly before the games even started. But in the movie I think only 2 tributes actually died before the games.

-As far as that rollercoaster at the beginning- it throws a LOT of information at you all at once- and not all of it is mentioned again. Especially not the cannibalism- which I feel could have been changed a bit?

-We didn't get much about Snow's peers, which is a shame since he has SO MUCH that he thinks about each one of them and their backgrounds in the books.

-Clemensia's poisoning should have been more colorful, and could have been WAY more grotesque. I'm talking a rainbow of mottled skin spreading up her arm until her face swells shut. We also should have gotten confirmation on whether or not she died.

It would have been more satisfying if during Snow's hospitalization, he tried to see her, only to find those golden scales covering her body and turning her eyes yellow like in the book.

-I wish Maude Ivory was more of a character- she's one of the main reasons it's theorized The Hanging Tree and other songs by Lucy Gray are remembered.

-In the book, in that last conversation with the doctor, she tells Snow that she will never replay the footage of the 10th games. There's too much rebellion attached to it. I wish that line has been kept- that way his thoughts of "People will forget her" actually have a bit more weight.

-I wish we had seen more of Sejanus' mom- just to see what costumes would have done with her dresses.

-I wish we saw more of Tigris' designs, or heard more of her struggles with her boss- just a mention of what she had to do to keep the House of Snow on top.

I think that's it for now? I just watched it last night, so some things need a bit longer to be thought about, but in general I just want MORE.

[devinescribe]

I’m Right Here

Ch. 4 of “My Sunshine” [TreechxReader]

Warnings: Swearing, mention of Brandy’s body being hung up(it happened in the book), and I think that’s it?

The tributes stared in shock. You, a Capitol girl, stood in the middle of the zoo cage, apologizing. Apologizing for things you hadn't done. You just didn't know how to put your words together.

"For a minute- just a minute, I-i forgot where we were... I wasn't back home.... I forgot... that you're in the Hunger Games... and I feel like an ignorant fool. I-I shoulda... stopped her. Should've noticed... I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry," you weeped, falling to your knees.

It remained quiet for a bit, the only sound being your hiccups and apologies. Until you felt a hand on your shoulder. At first, you thought it was Treech. But it was too small.

You looked up and saw Dill.

"It's not your fault..." she whispered, her voice hoarse.

You stood up immediately, bringing her in to an embrace.

"You're a real sweet girl," you whispered.

How you hoped you didn't have to watch her die.

"I should be the one comforting you guys... I'm sorry for cryin' like that..." you said, a bit embarrassed of how you acted.

"You've got feelings too. Can't expect you to hide 'em... at least we know you're sorry," Lucy Gray said. The group hummed in agreement.

Soon they went away from the wall, going off to their own corners of the cage.

Treech pulled you away to a corner where Lamina was already sitting.

You remembered her slightly from schools. She was really quiet though, and you never really talked to her.

You felt Treech lay his head on your lap, and you took off his hat, placing it gently besides you. You then begsn to run your fingers through his hair, humming a song you two used to sing when you were kids. It was a lullaby. Soon he fell asleep.

"Today's the first day I've seen him smile," Lamina says, playing with her hair.

You look up at her, your (e/c) eyes meeting with her green ones with a confused look.

"After you left... he was a wreck. Inconsolable for weeks. Didn't really talk to anyone... he still doesn't. He goes off every day in those woods by himself, people say he's angry and that's why he gets so much wood... he don't talk much... but he's kind," she whispers.

"Lamina, I... I'm sorry I wasn't kind to you as a kid," you said.

It was her turn to be confused.

"I should've invited you to play with us... something," you said quietly.

"It's really no big deal. You're here now. And we're talkin' now... so the score is settled. Plus I finally got to taste those famous chocolate chip cookies he used to brag about gettin'. Ya know he was a little asshole," she giggled.

You gave a small laugh.

"I'm gonna hit the hay... good night," she said, laying down.

You smiled, waiting before hearing her soft snores. You softly moved Treech off of your lap, trying to not wake him up, but you failed, making him groan and whine.

"Nooo.... Come back," he mumbled, gripping onto your skirt.

He was like a five year old.

You lay besides him, and kept running your hand through his hair.

"Close your eyes, my love, so dear...Underneath the night so clear. Dream of worlds beyond this one, Where the gentle moon and stars do run. Rest your head upon my chest, Feel the rhythm, soft and blessed. In dreams, may this forever shine, In your heart, for all of time," you sang softly, watching a smile spread across his lips as he fell right back asleep.

You curled up besides him, falling asleep almost instantly.

The next morning you awoke due to some giggling. You groggily opened your eyes, groaning. In front of you, you saw Wovey. She was giggling. Then you saw Lucy Gray smiling. You thought she may have something to ask or say.

You tried to stand up, but then realized the weight on you.

"Oh how wonderful..." you mumbled.

When you were kids, falling asleep with Treech ended with you being squished. It was a death sentence if you had any important things to do that day because you were not leaving till he woke up.Not on purpose. But he was a dog. A puppy begging for attention.

His arms were wrapped around you, his head on your chest, half his body on top of you.

"Treech... hey... time to wake up," you said softly, shaking him awake softly.

He groaned and opened his eyes.

"Mind hoppin' off me? You ain't small no more. The difference is quite large," you said jokingly.

"Shit, sorry sunshine... oh fuck, sorry Wovey. I-"

You put a hand over his mouth.

"There we go. So pretty when you don't talk," you joked.

He pouted.

The peacekeepers came in and you stood up defensively, going to protect them.

"Ms. (L/N), it's time for you to head on home to change. You have interviews today," one spoke.

"She's... still going ahead?" You asked.

"With interviews. The games will be slightly delayed. It's alright, the Plinth Prize is still-"

"I don't give a damn 'bout some money I don't need," you interrupted.

You looked back at the tributes, and down to Treech. He looked sick. Like he was going to throw up.

"Alright, out," the peacekeeper said, grabbing your arm.

You ripped it away and they pointed their guns at your

"Just because you're Capitol now doesn't mean that everyone views you as such. They know you're just a district mutt, and won't mind seeing you shot dead after what happened yesterday," they spat.

You looked back, and to stop from any problems arising, you walked straight to the gate. The guard let you out. Looking back at the cage, you sighed.

—-

It had been a long day for you two. The long hike up to the lake, and then the swimming for hours.

You both sat under a tree, his head on your shoulder.

"That... song you sang the other night... what was it?" He asked.

"I made it up," you giggled, watching the sunset over the water. The pine trees on the other bank of the lake were illuminated in its golden light.

"That's... why I call you sunshine," he said, seemingly out of no where.

You turned to look at him confused.

"The way it lights up the trees... kinda like how you light me up... and it's pretty," he explained, giving a toothy grin.

——

You were at the Academy earlier than the rest of the people. Earlier than everyone except for Snow and Sejanus.

"You stayed there all night are you-"

"Fucking crazy? I'm district but-"

"No way I'm hell would I have stayed-"

"Shut up! Both of y'all..." you yelled, sitting in a chair across from them, laying your head in the table.

You felt a hand softly tap your arm three times.

'Are you ok.'

"I... I'm as ok as can be Sej..." you whispered, grabbing his hand."Y'know... for a while... I forgot they were tributes... forgot about the games... forgot where I was... I thought I had finally just woken up from the nightmare, and woken up back in Seven and Treech was dancin' with me for fun and games..."

The silence was deafening.

You could feel Sejanus's hand squeeze yours before tracing gentle patterns on it.

"These games aren't fair. They aren't... it's just killing kids to kill kids! For what? A punishment? It's disgusting," Sejanus was pissed off as he said this.

"You can't keep saying that you're going to get in trouble," Coryo hissed.

You hummed in agreement. You loved Sejanus. With all your heart, you loved Sejanus. But he was going to get himself killed. Some days you wondered if he was going to hate you as much as Capitol kids for not speaking up. You kept your head down on the table.

"I've... I've never seen you as happy as I did last night," Snow mused.

You nodded. You were happy. Before the incident, you had forgotten where you were.

"We aren't happy here in the Capitol, Coryo," Sejanus sighed, as he stood up walking next to you.

He looked so confused when you looked up. In his mind, the districts were full of people clamoring to kill each other, starving, like animals.

You sighed and sat up, putting your head on Sejanus's shoulder.

"Well... interviews are today... and so is Arachne's funeral... hey, Coryo, did you finish your assignment?" You mumbled, looking up at him.

He nodded and pulled out the folder he had placed them in, his best handwriting scrawled across the parchment.

"Clemensia didn't write a word," you said, looking between him and the paper.

You could tell he as shifted uncomfortably in his seat, that you were correct. But he was going to lie and cover for Clemensia.

'Do not take the blame for someone who would throw you to the wolves if their life was in danger.'

——

"You're gonna get hurt climbin' up so high one day," Treech shouted up at you.

You had climbed a tall tree almost to the top.

"Nuh uh!" Was all you exclaimed before sitting on a branch.

He looked into the dense forest, studying the area around. It was quiet. Almost too quiet. He had grown accustomed to the sound of birds and the rustling of the leaves, but it was completely and utterly silent.

"(N/N)... I don't like this..." he called up to you. "It's too quiet, come on let's go."

He heard you huff and yell out a 'fine'

Soon you were back down on the forest floor and your hand was in his hand, he started taking you back. He really did not feel good about right now. He knew the only time the woods went quiet was when there was either a big storm coming or predators. Big ones. Or large groups of them.

But he'd never felt scared to encounter a predator. This must be something else completely.

"You worry too much," you whispered as you walked back through the woods into town. He kept looking back behind you.

You heard a voice call out and then some footsteps. Treech definitely did not like that. He dragged you to a tree, urging you to climb.

You wanted to be snarky and say something like "oh now I can climb" but you didn't, seeing the fear in his eyes. You quickly climbed the tree, him right behind you.

Sitting in the branch, right next to him. He pulled you close and did a shushing motion.

Once again stuck in a tree as soldiers passed under you. You felt something cold go over your legs and then felt something tickling your chin. You looked down and saw a snake. Your eyes widened and you tried your hardest to not scream. It wasn't big. But it was a venomous one.

In a swift motion, Treech pulled it off, throwing it down.

You both heard a scream and looked down. You both squished together as the soldier looked up. You swore your eyes met his.

"What was that?"

"Nothing. Fucking tree snake," the soldier said, keeping his gaze on you.

Whether he saw you or not, you didn't know.

The soldiers passed and you waited for a few moments after.

Maybe the people in the Capitol were not all horrible.

——-

The people in the Capitol were all horrible.

The interviews had been pushed back.

You first had to go the Arachne’s funeral. They asked Coriolanus to sing the anthem and so he did.

Suddenly you felt Sejanus grab your arm, “don’t look.”

You wished you would have listened. You wished you had just kept your head down in mourning. But you didn’t.

You looked up and saw Brandy strung up, her corpse as some sort of decoration.

You gasped, and immediately started bawling your eyes out, hiding your face in Sejanus’s chest. Many people thought you were crying tears for Arachne. Which in part was true because you didn’t wish death upon anyone.

But the reason you were so upset was Brandy. They had removed her pretty scarf and sweater that you had buttoned last night. The way they had her strung up for everyone to see. She was just a kid. Like you.

“S-she’s cold,” you whispered in between your sobs to Sejanus.

“Heart wrenching stuff here. (Y/N) mourning the loss of her friend Arachne and-“

You couldn’t listen to this. You walked out sobbing, and Sejanus came behind you.

Maybe they would think you were so overcome by grief of Arachne being gone. But you were not mourning Arachne’s death. The entirety of the Capitol would already be doing that. You would be mourning Brandy, a girl who died without even stepping foot into the arena.

“I-I can’t I can’t- I thought I could-“ you cry as Sejanus wraps his arms around you, your tears soaking into his uniform.

There were, of course camera people outside who recorded you, sobbing into the arms of your friend.

“You’re going to be ok… it’s ok, just breathe,” he mumbled.

“I-it’s not fair… how could they do that? That’s someone’s daughter…” you whispered through sniffles.

You didn’t want the people filming to record your words. You wished they would stop.

_-_-_-_

Treech watched the TV that all the tributes were forced to see. He didn’t know what was going on, but decided watching it was better than sitting bored.

He couldn’t have been more wrong

He should have known. He should have known that when they forced them to watch the TV that it wasn’t going to be anything good.

A gasp was ripped from his throat as he looked down, unable to watch the horrific thing they had done.

One tribute threw up. Some started crying.

He heard crying coming from the TV and his head shot up. He knew that crying. His eyes searched the TV until saw you walking out with the boy you called ‘Sejanus’ tailing after you.

The camera quickly cut to outside in the hallway where he saw Sejanus wrap his arms around you. He couldn’t help but feel a gnawing sense of jealousy. He was upset about the situation as it was, but it added to it. He couldn’t even stop her crying. Why were the cameras filming for so long on her?

He didn’t realize how hard his fists were clenched until the end of the broadcast. As soon as the TV shut off, his shoulders slumped and he looked down at his hands. He had crescent shaped dents, a small bit of blood from one of his hands from how hard he had been clenching his fists.

[sniffanimal]

Hey boss do you have an actual recipe for that gyro bowl? Or do you just cook by vibes? Literally have been thinking about that thang for a whole day, lol

So, I've cooked *similar* things from recipe but I was going off pure vibes alone, BUT I can type up what I did in a sort of recipe-esque format for you! This may not be 1:1 exactly what I cooked, but it might be close?

Recipe for Donnie's Gyro Bowl below:

Ingredience (amount of each fed 3 people in excess, so maybe 4 servings?):

1lb Ground Lamb (can be omitted for a vegetarian friendly recipe, or changed for Protein Of Choice)

2 roma tomatoes

1 cucumber

1 zucchini

2 cans of chickpeas

1 large white onion

Dill weed (I ended up having to get dry, but fresh is better!)

Pearl Couscous (1 box, was roughly 2 cups of dry couscous)

greek yogurt (1 little cup of it)

1 lemon, or a decent amount of lemon juice

white wine vinegar

feta

"tuscan seasoning blend" which seems to be mostly basil, oregano, rosemary, thyme, garlic, and fennel.

"taco seasoning" which I used mostly for its cayenne, i would have liked to use paprika and cayenne together instead of relying on taco mix

Garlic powder (again, would have liked at least minced garlic if not fresh)

onion powder

red pepper flakes

Olive oil, butter, salt, and pepper

preheat oven to 400f. Dice tomato and zucchini (keeping them separate), and halve then slice thinly the onion. Zest and halve the lemon then juice into a bowl/cup. Dice half the cucumber, then grate the other half on the medium/large size holes on a box grater (or really finely chop it into mush).

Put the diced cucumber and half the tomatoes in a bowl and add half a cup of white wine vinegar and some warm water. Add a few tsp of lemon juice, salt, pepper, and Dill. Allow to quick pickle while everything else cooks.

drain chickpeas well and mix in a bowl with olive oil and what feels like the right amount of tuscan seasoning and taco mix powder. the peas should look well coated but not like Caked with Seasoning. Toss to mix and then spread out in a single layer on a greased cookie sheet. Bake for ~25 minutes depending on your oven. They might make popping sounds while cooking, be not afraid.

Melt a little butter in a pot and then add the couscous to toast it a bit before adding the same amount in water and then a little extra, maybe 1/4 cup extra. Stir in a generous amount of garlic and onion powders and boil for uhhh a bit until all the water has been absorbed. If couscous is undercooked and all the water is absorbed then add some more and cook until done. Keep warm until ready to serve.

In another pan, melt a bit more butter then add the lamb, stirring to break it up and brown it. I added a lot of the seasonings in different amounts, and some chili pepper flakes. Once cooked through, add half the tomato to cook with it. Once the tomato is soft and the lamb is fully cooked, remove from the pan and keep warm.

To the ~juices~ from the cooked lamb in the pan, add the zucchini and onion and cook well until the zucchini is soft and charred and the onions are soft. Season with Salt, Pepper, and Dill. Add more butter or oil if you didn't have any animal fats left over from meat.

To the greek yogurt, add the shredded cucumber, some lemon juice, dill, salt, and pepper. Stir to combine and taste to see if it's balanced.

To serve, put a layer of couscous at the bottom of the bowl, followed by chickpeas, the meat mix, the cooked veggies, the cucumber tomato salad, and then tzatziki sauce. Top with crumbled feta cheese.

The dish has such a mix of great flavors and textures and temperatures and heat and cream and lemon sour and its all just really really delicious. It did take maybe 40 minutes for me to cook but was soooooo worth it new favorite thing to cook for people.

Also if you were wondering, I went to the grocery store to buy everything I needed to make it more or less and it was about $35 and fed 3-4. The real expensive parts were the dill and the lamb, so those comprised $20 of it. If you already have dill, and omit or change the meat, it's a lot cheaper. Also its 2024 and groceries are expensive as hell.

[master-of-47-dudes]

okay

friends, mutuals, countrythem. the world needs to know about this so if you see it please reblog this. this is a 100% serious. i have important information for the world.

i have invented a sandwich. i have yet to name it. but it is an INCREDIBLE sandwich that needs both suspension of disgust and willingness to try something so that you may discover something wonderful.

this sandwich is as follows: on buttered rye bread: PEANUT BUTTER

SRIRACHA

THAI BASIL & MINT

DILL PICKLE SLICES

A FRIED EGG SEASONED WITH SALT, PEPPER, PAPRIKA, AND RED PEPPER FLAKES

AMERICAN CHEESE

JAM (i used homemade peach-spice jam, but any should work) what you do is you close that sandwich up. you butter the top. you use the skillet that you just fried that egg in and fry up the sandwich like a grilled cheese. butter down. two minutes at just under medium heat. flip. two more minutes, throw some water in there and cover to steam it so it melts the cheese real good.

What you will get is no less than an INCREDIBLE SANDWICH. GENUINELY 11/10. EVERYTHING, and i mean EVERYTHING comes together in harmony to create this creamy, perfectly balanced mixture of flavors with just the right amount of crunch from the bread and the pickles and just the right amount of spiciness and acidity to keep the peanut butter and cheese from being overwhelming, and just enough cooling from the mint to keep things interesting.

my current name is "the Dudewich". Or perhaps "The Pantry Staple" given its nature and invention of something made of staple ingredients used with a bare fridge before going shopping. but feel free to come up with a name and suggest it.

i guess i could blaze this to get it out there but what's important is that this knowledge i have created is shared. the world NEEDS to know about this sandwich.

[voskhodart]

Listen to me. Here’s what you’re gonna do. You’re gonna go to the store. You’re going to buy a potato. You’re going to take that potato home with you. You’re going to preheat your oven to 375°F (190°C). Are you listening? Alright. You’re gonna slice the potato. Thin slices. Don’t worry about getting it perfect. We don’t have time for perfection. You’re gonna put those potato slices in a bowl. And then— this part is important— you’re gonna pour enough olive oil to coat the slices. On top of that, you’re gonna add some garlic powder, salt, Italian seasoning, and a little bit of dill. If you want to get real wild, you can chop up some fresh onion and garlic and add it to the mix. Stay with me here. You’re going to mix all of that stuff up. Then, you’re gonna get yourself a baking sheet with some non-stick foil or whatever. Spread out the slices on it. Again, it don’t need to be perfect. Sprinkle a little more salt over ‘em. Maybe a little tiny bit of Parmesan. Pop em in the oven. 20 minutes. 15 if you want a softer bite, 30 if you want ‘em crunchy. But I like 20. Gives ‘em some crispy edges with a softer middle. They’re gonna look a little weird and off-putting, but so do I. And that’s okay.

[jordanandegypt]

Zürich, Switzerland

Tuesday, Sept 10, 2024

Greetings All.  We are in Zurich trying to change our body clocks by 6 hours.  Easier said than done.  We flew yesterday from Detroit to Amsterdam and the idea is to sleep the night away as we transverse the Atlantic - but both Mark and I got maybe 2 - 2.5 hours of sleep during our 7 hour flight.  We left Detroit at 6:30 PM and arrived 7 hours later in Amsterdam at 8:30 AM their time. - but at 1:30 AM our time.  We had a short layover (1 hr and 25 minutes) but in Amsterdam this is JUST enough time to get to your next flight - so we got to the gate and boarded.  The flight from Amsterdam to Zürich is only an hour and while I may have slept on that flight it was not more than 20 minutes.

We got a pretty pricey cab from the airport to our hotel - but we could not face figuring out public transportation as tired as we were.  Sadly - our hotel room was not ready.  We opted for a leisurely lunch in which Mark had cold spicy melon soup and I have garam marsala butter chicken - both delicious - but really all we wanted was a bed to stretch out on.  (Don’t worry I will not tell you everything we eat!!) After lunch we got the news that our room still wasn’t ready and I did something I have NEVER done - feel asleep in a chair in the lobby of the hotel.  But by 3:30 we were in our hotel and we opted for naps - until 5:00.  Hopefully bedtime will come easily...

Enough about us…. Let’s get to our adventure...

The theme for this trip is “OLD STUFF.”  We will start with "real old" and work our way to "OMG WAY WAY OLD."  We, in the US, get so excited when we see a structure from the late 1600s  or early 1700s - but that is a joke in this part of the world - kinda a “baby building.”  

So let’s start with Zürich Switzerland - our current “home."

From what we have seen, Zürich is a beautiful city surrounded by the foothills of the Alps mountains located at the northern end of Lake Zürich and built on Limmat River (pronounced “Limit” that flows from Lake Zürich.  This city has a history going back centuries. 

The town was founded by the Romans a bit over 2,000 years ago. Recent excavations show evidence of settlement even before that -  over 6,400 years ago. 

We explored the old city from about 5:30 to 9:00 - or 17:30 to 21:00 - as any citizen of the world would say - with a a few exceptions - like us.

Surprises:  There are no “walk/don’t walk” signs - pedestrians just have the right of way - PERIOD!

There is graffiti everywhere - I was shocked!

EVERYONE smokes!  Or it seems that way.  DISGUSTING!

I went to buy our 24 hour pass for public transportation and was told to just keep in with us.  If asked we would have to show it - but there is no check in - check out system.  Trust, my friends.

Things we expected:  Public transportation options would be numerous and easy to use and very clean.

People would be helpful and kind

Things would be EXPENSIVE.

We took the tram to old town and at one point saw this:

While we were listening to  this:  

Kind of eye and ear candy.

I think I forgot to say what the Swiss flag looked like - so here you go…

We ate dinner at an outdoor cafe - late - (when in Rome, so they say) and it was outstanding.  Mark had cold roast beef with horseradish sauce and I had “Rösti” with smoked salmon, onions, capers and a dill sauce.  OMG!!!

Rösti is shredded potatoes fried in butter and made into a mound.  You can get lots of different kinds of “Rösti’ and I highly recommend it.  Split with someone  - it is huge.  (It will be breakfast for us tomorrow.)

Tomorrow - we will explore more than the transportation system.  I’m going to bed. It is 22:00 here and I'm hoping to wake up for the first - and maybe only - presidential debate - which would be 3:00 AM here. If I do - I'll watch it live. If I don't - I will be more rested when I watch it later Either way - we are in Zürich rooting for Kamala!!

CIAO!  (Yes - they say that here too)

[fumaspokemonball]

Fuma helps you feel better about college!!

Trigger warning: There is actually quite a bit of cursing (I’m sorry) and a bit of angst? Anger is definitely a big part of the story. If there’s anything else let me know please!!

Summary: You begin to feel overwhelmed by the amount of college work you have on top of your full time job that you’re not feeling appreciated by. You’re embarrassed to ask for help and end up bottling up all your feelings. Fuma has to rush home to help you.

Fuma and female reader!

Author note: I apologize if this story is not good. It’s my first one I’ve written in a hot minute. Please feel free to help me find ways to improve! I hope you enjoy🩵🩵

I got home from a long day of work and still had so much to do. I had to clean the house, I had to finish school that was due later that evening, I had to shower still, and make myself food? To be honest, I just want to get into my pajamas and fall asleep. Work was exhausting, not even the animals made me happy anymore.

My boss is a real dill hole. No matter how hard I try I can’t seem to do anything right. I come in on my days off, I work overtime, I help other coworkers with task that I didn’t even know existed! I do everything and my manager still puts “standard employee” on my evaluation. I go above and beyond my pay grade and this is the thanks I get?! I want to quit. If it wasn’t for the amazing sea life I would have by now….but who else gets to work with these beautiful creatures? It was so hard to get this job…

I took my shoes off and carried myself to my room. I started right away on my school. Why the fuck I wanted to get my Ph.D in marine biology beats the shit outta me. Apparently it will look good? Idfk, all I know is I want out. 16 page essay due in 3 days!! Fuck you. I have a full time job! 16 pages in 3 days is so fucking much?! Not only that but a fucking math class on top?! I suck at math. Always have.

*If X is equal to 3,050 than what is y?*

Fuck if I know! This is so frustrating. I threw my laptop and screamed my lungs out. This shit is ridiculous. Im dropping out. I’m done. I don’t need a Ph.D! Nothing is worth this amount of stress.

*Knock* *Knock*

I looked up at my door to it opening up slowly. A worried face peers around the corner.

“Y/N Are you okay?” Ej walked in asking. I teared up. So many emotions were flying through my mind all at once. In simple terms I wasn’t okay. I was so stressed and I let it all bottle up. I don’t want to talk about it. I want to scream, I want to cry, I want to throw up, everything. I want it to end. All my life.

“Respectfully, Ej please go.” I sounded harsh. I didn’t mean it. I wanted nothing more than to tell him. Am I being dramatic? Am I being annoying? Idk. But I just need to relax.

Ej shut the door and I heard him walk down the hall. I hope I didn’t hurt his feelings. I grabbed my pajamas and went to take a shower. Maybe the hot water will calm me down.

~Ejs POV~

I’ve never seen Y/N so upset. I was startled when I heard screaming so I wanted to make sure everything was alright. I think I saw tears fall from her face. I wanted nothing more than to give my bestie a hug and comfort her until Fuma came home. She’s never pushed me away before. She always jokes with us and helps us when we’re stressed so it’s weird to see the rolls reversed.

“Fuma.” I whispered over the phone. I didn’t want Y/N to hear me call him. The last thing I needed was her to get mad at me for calling the one person who could calm her down.

“Is everything alright?” Fuma sounded worried.

“Well..”

~Fuma’s POV~

I was practicing for our comeback when I heard my phone ring. I ran over to see Ej calling me. He doesn’t call when he knows I’m practicing so I got worried.

“Fuma.” I heard him whisper from the other side of the phone. Why is he whispering?

“Ej? Is everything alright? Why are you whispering?” I was already breathing heavy but I could feel my heart face faster.

“No. Y/N was screaming in your guises dorm room and when I went to check on her she was crying and-“ I hung up before he could finish and ran home. What was wrong? Was everything okay? Why is she screaming? Why is she crying?! I need her and I need her now.

~Y/Ns POV~

I got out of the shower and went back to my room. I locked my door so I had no interruptions. I laid down on the bed and felt my eyes become heavy. I couldn’t sleep yet. I had to do school. I opened my laptop and started doing school. I started getting frustrated again. Why was it so hard?! No one gives a shit about the fucking relationship between X and Y!!

I groaned so loud and sunk into my pillow. I threw my laptop again and huffed.

“This is fucking ridiculous!!” I laid down and just stared at the ceiling. I felt my eyes become heavy when I heard the door handle turn. I groaned. “It’s locked.” I turned to my side.

“Y/N open!” Fuma said worriedly. I ignored him. Alone time. That’s what I need.

“No.” I choked. He started turning the knob really fast and knocking again and again. I put the pillow over my ears and started balling my eyes out. I’m sorry Fuma. I’m sorry.

Eventually all the loud knocking stopped. I felt a pair of hands grab mine and I looked up.

~Fuma’s POV~

I tried opening our bedroom door but it was locked. I knocked loudly and called out for her. Why did she lock the door?!

“No.” I heard a small voice call out. No? What do you mean no?! I started to panic and knock louder still calling her name. Nothing. That’s it.

After what felt like an eternity of trying, which was only like 5 minutes, I went to grab the spare key to unlock the door. She must not have cared enough to bring it with her. I unlocked the door and saw her small frame laying on the bed she had placed a pillow over her ears to muffle my yells. I could hear small sobs coming from her mouth. I looked over to see her laptop open to her homework.

I sighed in relief. Nothing was physically wrong with her but now it’s my turn to be the boyfriend I know I can be and help her. I know how exhausting this is all been on her mentally. I walked over and grabbed her hands.

~Y/N’s POV~

“Fuma? But-“ That was all I managed to get out before he shook his head at me. I was confused how he got in.

“It’s okay, I used the spare key. Love, if you needed help why didn’t you say anything? You know I’m here for you and when I’m not we’re all here for you.” Fuma began to rub my side and looked deep into my soul. I could see he was hurt but more worried about me. I couldn’t make eye contact much longer.

“It’s embarrassing Fuma!! I shouldn’t be this bad at math! I’m a fucking biologist for Christ sake!!” I didn’t mean to yell but all that stress was coming back up. This is why I didn’t want to speak to anyone! This is why I wanted to just keep the door shut and left alone! I ripped my hands out of his and cried into them. Fuma frowned and picked me up. He sat me in his lap and held me tight. The top of my head fit into the crook of his neck and I could hear his heart beat.

“It’s okay if you’re not good at math. Everyone can’t be good at everything. So you’re a biologist? You work with animals. You don’t spend every waking moment of every day solving algebra equations.” He played with the fabric of my shirt as he held onto me. I sniffled and looked up at him.

“You’re not embarrassed by me?” I pouted. My puffy red eyes looked into his for approval.

“What?! Of course not!! You’re one of the smartest people I know! You get paid to literally take care of animals all day! I love bragging to people about that! Also not just any animal but freaking water animals?! That’s even cooler!! They’re like you’re own personal Pokémon! I’m so proud of you! I’d be happy to show you off to anyone! Hell, I’ll show you off to the whole dorm right now.” I laughed and shook my head.

“Noo!!” I joked. I hugged him tightly. “Thank you Fuma. I love you.” I kissed his cheek and just felt so safe. I felt his arms wrap around my waist and squeeze me tightly.

“Pinky Promise me you’ll come to me next time before you explode? I want to help you.” Fuma grabbed my cheeks and made me look at him. He held out a pinky. I wrapped my tiny pinky around his and nodded.

“I pinky promise I will come to you next time.” I gave him a soft smile and he smiled in return.

“Good! Now, let’s go find out why, Y is trying to go back to their X.” He jumped up to grab my laptop. I rolled my eyes and laughed. Oh his dumb jokes.

[incaensio]

setting : the ruins of district twelve, around one or two in the afternoon of the fourteenth day after the arena outbreak, several hours before peeta's interview. trigger warning for : bombing, gore, death, vomit, alcohol, grief.

the bombs have done the opposite of what the capitol spent decades doing: it made town and seam the same. everywhere it's ashes, retorted melted objects, rubble, corpses. everything is too much, and every minute she spends amongst the dead and the ruins makes her want to run away, throw up or burrow herself with the dead.

in the end, she goes by the first, only to get to the second. her feet take her to the last place she called home, and her gag reflex only doesn't react because she's too shocked, eyes widened as her legs threaten to give in, as she walks through the slightly rusted gate of victor's village. katniss can't fathom why this patch of land would survive above all else, but she tries to suppress the thoughts as the selfish feeling of solace from everything else drags her to the everdeen house. it is quiet, as one would expect from a house abandoned —  she notes the signs of her family's haste on the shoes still on the entrance way, a pot still on the turned off stove, prim's needlework on the cushions, posy's doll on the floor. 

katniss collects the doll, and makes her way to the kitchen. she remembers mother talking about how good real medicine is, but at times she misses the herbs that work even when the fancy stuff doesn't, so she stuffs a handful of dry herbs in a plastic bag, then glances at the bottle of white liquor on one of the shelves. right. stored up booze for haymitch, just in case. she lingers for a little longer than she'd like there, thinking of her liar of a mentor, and if he was alive. she can't tell if she'd rather he is alive, suffering without a drop of this poison, or dead. she decides to take a glass bottle with some starchy stuff instead; peeta called it a sourdough starter, and took it out everyday to make bread. she takes a glance to the table where she'd sit and watch him work the dough, and exhales heavily, marching out of the kitchen at once.

their bedroom is just down there, but she can not face it now. she roams through the rest of the house first, adds other items to her scavenging: a picture of her parents on their wedding day (the only one of her father that still survives), a box of red hair ribbons, prim's favorite book. by the time she thinks she’s done, her hands are so full she has to make her way down to the dreaded bedroom. the first thing she can tell as she opens the door is that she can't escape the dead. her mother hasn't touched their bedroom since they left for the quell, so the window is open, and despite allowing ash to trickle in, she can still smell a faint scent of cinnamon and dill that makes something catch in her throat. 

blinking to stop the tears from falling, katniss walks in further, going to the closet, straight to what she wants: her game bag; usually big enough to carry a turkey and several other small game, it is a nice fit for the items she collected, and she puts the sling around her body, glancing up to the clothing there. there's a lot of capitol stuff still, but it is a a ratty, stretched out t-shirt with a faded 'district twelve wrestling team' print into the material that makes its way into the bag, and katniss swallows that lump of tears as she takes her father's hunting jacket, slipping it on, hoping to embody the safety it has always brought to her. it still smells of the forest, it still hangs a little too loose on her frame, but the comfort is only half there, so she walks out of the closet and doesn't bother to close the door. 

she is almost out of the bedroom when she takes note of a book on the table, and quickly makes her way towards that. the leather-binding is worn and some pages are almost brown, decaying, peeking out, threatening to fall apart entirely, a blinding contrast to its last pages, with its colorful designs of plants made by peeta, and her own handwriting detailing all the information she knew about the species around twelve. a tear falls to the paper, and quickly katniss closes the book, refusing to let any more of her sadness taint the work. 

but it doesn't stop. even as the book enters the game bag, the tears continue to flow, and she has to sit on the bed to stop the sobbing; by then, she has taken out peeta's shirt, but that does little to stop the stream.  the only thing that does is a noise of someone approaching — she turns around, wiping her face, an excuse for gale ready in the tip of her tongue, when she hears a loud meowing. 

slowly, she turns, and there it is. the ugliest cat to ever walk the earth, her sister's most precious possession, the most loathsome animal katniss has ever met. "you piece of shit." buttercup makes a distasteful sound in response, his cat-way of cursing her. "how the fuck—" she stops herself from completing the thought because she can not think of how buttercup has made it through these weeks as the only living thing in twelve, and has come out even with a bit more chub on his middle (country mice, she thinks. birds that have not fled. the grass that has not turned into ash. anything. anything but the half-melted dead people all around the district).

the stupid fucking cat jumps in the bed, goes straight to peeta's side in the mattress, and nestles there. katniss is furious and jealous and heartbroken, and she scoops buttercup with no gentleness —  he too has no interest in being nice, and fights back, earning her a few scratches she's used to.

"don't you want to see prim, you fuckin' idiot?" the cat stops. "good boy. we're gonna see prim." she has to take out prim's book so the cat fits, but katniss thinks that her sister won't mind leaving behind a book if she gets to have buttercup; the idea of his owner, and peeta's shirt next to him seems to make the feline so eager for the trip that he doesn't complain anymore, and she can even hear a purr as she stands up. wiping her eyes harshly, she decides it's best not to tempt buttercup's good mood, and, out of habit, she pats down the bed covering buttercup had messed up, only to find something under the pillow. 

a furrow settles in between her brows as she pulls out the white rose, perfect with its pristine petals, sharp thorns and sickening sweet smell. katniss' breath catches in her throat, and suddenly she can not even remember how peeta smells like, because everything in her lung has been taken by snow and his artificial roses and a promise that even when she is not here, he is. he will always be here, even when peeta is gone. and he will find her, and make sure everything else she holds dear is gone too.

she almost trips on her own feet as she steps away, clinging to the game bag. gale meets her in the entrance hall, but she refuses to comment on the reason for her dread. buttercup peeks his ugly head out of the bag just in time, and katniss pushes the furry head down, and shakes her own. she can't be here anymore. "let's just go."

[adamwatchesmovies]

Serenity (2019)

Serenity is goes off the rails so spectacularly it's fascinating to watch. This is not your typical “so bad it’s good” movie. It looks great. The actors are convincing. There are no technical errors to ridicule. The problem is writer/director Steven Knight, who thinks he’s made a movie so smart, so clever and so deep its surprises will have you picking your jaw off the floor. This movie is not smart; it’s preposterous. My advice? First, watch the trailer. It does a fantastic job selling the picture. Knowing nothing else, just go in, and wait. You'll learn that "surprising" does not equal "good".

Baker Dill (Matthew McConaughey) makes a living taking rich tourists fishing for sharks, swordfishes or other aquatic monsters. Lately, he’s become unhinged due to his obsession with “Justice”, an elusive giant tuna. His Captain Ahab-like antics have pushed him to the edge of bankruptcy. Then, his estranged ex-wife comes knocking. Karen (Anne Hathaway) offers Baker $10 million to kill her abusive husband, Frank (Jason Clarke).

While watching, it’ll be obvious something’s not right. Frank, for example. He’s a one-dimensional monster. In every scene, he’s giving his wife poisonous and threatening looks, getting drunk, talking about frequenting underage prostitutes, or otherwise proving himself to be wholly irredeemable. He is not a human being. He’s a cartoon. Similarly, other characters act strangely. Constance (Diane Lane) pays Baker for sex, there’s a strange bespectacled man (Jeremy Strong) who looks totally out of place and is constantly trying to catch up with Baker to give him something. You wonder what kind of place Baker is living in. If the man had any sense, he would jump on the $10 million offer even before learning his son (Rafael Sayegh) is receiving regular beatings from his stepfather. She could’ve given him $1,000 and he would’ve eagerly done it but not in this movie. So what’s actually going on?

In a twist, we learn this whole scenario exists within a video game. No one has any free will - except when they do, more on that in a second. Their actions are pre-programmed. This explains why Baker is obsessed with that fish, why Frank is an enemy you should have no qualms about killing, etc. Everyone is broad on purpose. That doesn’t really matter. Warning someone that the offensive thing you’re going to say is offensive does not make it acceptable. Acknowledging that a joke is unfunny does not make it funny. It gets even dopier when Serenity tosses the idea of free will into the mix. If Baker kills Frank, the teen who programmed the game will kill his real-life father. I guess the logic we’re operating on is that violent video games you make yourself can inspire real-life violence? It makes no sense.

Serenity drops a bombshell of a revelation on you and then lingers on it. All this gives you is enough time to realize just how dopey a story this is. As a cherry on top, it introduces another last-minute twist that’s in no way shocking or surprising, particularly considering everything we just saw means nothing in the end. You'll wonder what everyone involved was thinking. (January 24, 2020)

[grimsneverendingfuneral]

ok so i played ~chef cook~ tonight and im so proud of this creation

It’s eggplant cut in half (sliced diagonally) (make sure to put salt on the eggplant, wait 10 min to get the moisture out then pat em down) then grilled on the pan until they’re brown. Put them in the oven for 10 minutes to make em real fluffy anD THEN you make a green sauce with a greek yogurt base, lemon zest, lots of dill, garlic and chili oil (you dont have to add the chili oil i just wanted it to be spicy)

TOP IT ALL OFF with feta chunks and crushed pistachios BITCH (this is optional but for people who hate soft textures this is good)

I FEEL a sense of accomplishment that has nourished my very soul

Note: This only works on neurodivergent brain (me) if you pretend you’re a character in a book that happens to have a secret talent for cooking and is cooking for a loved one that occasionally will kiss your shoulder.

I think I’m gonna start posting my meals here so I can feel motivated to cook for myself cause it’s actually super fun if I have it all planned out ahead of time :)

[bnyrbt]

cc: ‘’what do you see, you see carrots, or do you see bacon? I’m about to make carrot bacon, uh huh. You need a shaver, need to shave it like so like that. See how it looks real thin? Uh huh. Now you got a few strips, but you know what, you want more than this, do that cause that’s your business. You gone need some liquid smoke, maple syrup, don’t call it a comeback honey you’ve been here for years- garlic powder, smoked paprika, and a little bit of this onion powder with pepper. Like so like that you mix this all up cause this is your seasoning, this your concoction for your carrots. to turn it into the bacon. Put the bacon in there, make sure to get thoroughly seasoned, you can leave it in there for about two minutes or so. Put it in your air fryer or your oven. 380 (degrees) five minutes. Take it out and baby you got some bacon there lets taste the crunch. 

Listen real good- [crunch noise]. yup. Now you make your BLT wrap, with a little pickle and a little onion. Let me just show you: see that? I got my little roasted uh, sun dryed tomato wrap, with some mayo, I got some micro greens like so like that, tomato, red but purple onion, uh dill pickles are the way to go, and then that’s the carrot bacon but add a little bit more because that’s my business. And I can do that if I want to. Yeah, like so like that. Then we’re gonna wrap it up- I almost forgot the avocado, let me grab one. Now we can wrap it up, okay? Wrap it up (x3) like so like that. Let’s cut it in half, like so like that. Ooh, let’s look at it, look at look at it look at it (?), honey look at that carrot bacon. Thank the lord for it, ooh god thank you. (singing) I know it was the blood.’’

Carrot bacon is a great bacon substitute