#difference is billy would never leave max with neil

[weird-an]

Billy isn't her brother. He's supposed to be, her mom wants him to be because Neil wants him to be, but he isn't and Max doesn't want him to.

No one asked her for this. Most of the time she doesn't even listen when Neil hits him. It's not her business and Billy doesn't want her help. Has told her many times with a puffy eye or a split lip, when she didn't say anything, but just wondered.

Sometimes it's like there are two Billy's. The one that doesn't show up very often, whispering to her how to act towards Neil to get what she wants and teaches her how to skate, always with rolling eyes and a laugh and the one that is there most of the time, closed off and biting and scratching. Full of anger, because that's the only thing Neil Hargrove can teach his son.

She isn't sure how many times it really happens, but she always feels sick when her mom and her visit Aunt Sharon or Granny and they leave them alone.

This time though she sees it. There are no marks on Billy's face, but Neil's belt is on the couch and Neil is so disgustingly happy to see Susan again - and Max, too, or so he says.

Max doesn't know what happened but the next morning Neil drives her to school and Billy doesn't leave his room.

She tries not to think about how there is no fourth plate on the kitchen table and that for one second she fears that that's it, that Billy might never have to drive her to school again - because he can't.

She presses her ear against Billy's door when Neil is busy watching some news and ranting about people that don't look like him. She can't hear anything. Neil is too loud or Billy is too quiet.

Max is about to go to bed, but not tired at all, when there's a knock at her window. She pulls back the curtain.

Steve Harrington looks like he hasn't slept in days. She opens the window.

"What are you doing here?" she whispers.

Steve seems to consider his answer, but then he just sighs.

"He isn't opening his window," he says, rubbing his face in pure exhaustion. "Is he .. ?"

"Billy?" she asks slowly. She didn't know Steve is Billy's friend. She didn't know Billy had any friends at all. Only admirers and rivals - at least here in Hawkins.

"Yeah. He wasn't at school."

"Are you friends?"

"Something like that."

Neil will kill them, if he finds out. But he isn't her father and never will be.

"Come in."

Steve climbs through her window. Nearly stumbles when he walks against the walkie talkie she left on the floor.

Neil must have gone to bed. It's silent.

She opens the door to Billy's room. She can sees his blond curls peeking out from underneath the blankets. Steve is by his side in a second.

Max closes the door. Slow, because she doesn't want to make any noise. Slower, because she is curious. She never gets to see what Billy is really like.

Steve sits next to him on the bed. Strokes his hair and whispers something. Careful, like Lucas does when she's sad, because the whole world is a shit show.

The door is nearly closed when she sees Steve kissing Billy's forehead. Maybe Steve knows a different Billy, too.

She feels light. Relieved in a way she doesn't get. She's glad Billy is not alone, she finds. Even if she didn't expect that.

Billy isn't her brother, but she will keep his secret like a sister would.

[ihni]

Bro, my first thought was that this would be HORRIBLE for Billy and Steve because the second Billy shoulder-checked Steve during basketball they would've hit the ground in front of EVERYONE. But then like. I thought more about it and it got worse.

Because Billy would kinda know that his soulmate is gonna be a guy, right. And he'd be doing everything he could to prevent anyone from ever finding out, so

He's been getting into massive arguments with Neil his whole life, every time his dad tries to get him into sports. When he's a kid his dad accuses him of being a pussy for shying away from really engaging with the team, never wanting to make contact with anyone, thinking that Billy's afraid of getting hurt while playing. Billy tries to push back as much as he can, he hates not being able to do anything to prove his dad wrong because he can't tell him the TRUTH, and he gets too angry to come up with a convincing lie.

He gets so paranoid about physical contact that he develops a reputation for beating the shit out of guys who so much as bump into him in the hallway at school. It happens a couple times. Some kid in his class will brush past him, not realizing who he is, and it scares him so much he lashes out.

Once he gets a little older he starts dating (girls) as much as possible. It's for his safety, he tells himself, and ignores the part where he just misses being touched so much he'll settle for whatever he can get. Which is not as much as he'd like, considering most of the girls his age are fucking terrified of him. (Moving to Indiana doesn't help much, he might have the advantage of being a relative unknown, but there's fewer girls who are willing to cozy up with a guy who isn't their soulmate.)

In short. Touch-starved Billy

And that fight at the Byers would go soooo differently....As in it probably would not happen at all, because up until this point they have not touched at all, and have barely interacted because they don't have basketball together and Billy's just been obsessed with Steve from a distance.

Then like. He shows up and Steve is being weird and Billy wants to touch him for all kinds of reasons, but he's also firmly against touching him for just as many. He's wound up and stressed and he can't lash out like he wants to, so he just ignores Steve and walks right into the Byers' house to take it out on the kids. He doesn't have the same hangups about pushing Max around, or Lucas. He knows neither of them could be his soulmate, so they're fair game.

But he's barely said two words to Max before Steve (who in this scenario has NOT been shoved to the ground and kicked, so was right behind Billy as he walked into the house) grabs his shoulder to get his attention, and they both hit the floor.

Which would be so interesting because it's technically the same result as the fight, both of them passed out (thought Max doesn't get to stand up to Billy), so the plot could continue as normal from there, except. Like. The kids are freaking out for entirely different reasons, Max is swearing them all to secrecy and worrying about what Billy's gonna do when he wakes up, and half of them are yelling about how much this does not matter right now because there's monsters to set on fire. Dustin's having a mild crisis about getting advice about girls a couple hours ago from a guy who might be gay now?? There's a debate about whether they should bring Steve with them after Max steals Billy's keys. Mike is uncomfortable with the idea and won't admit why. Dustin gets pissed at him. Lucas tries to breeze past the whole weird soulmate thing and focus on the fact that they'll need all the help they can get if they're gonna do this.

They do still bring him along, and leave Billy behind.

I feel like it would be so interesting for Steve to be trying to concentrate on fighting monsters and protecting the kids but there's this weird new soulmate bond thing distracting him, and he's so incredibly confused by it because it's with BILLY.

Meanwhile Billy wakes up alone in the Byers' house, and has a panic attack when he realizes what happened. His first instinct is to just get in his car and leave town because now this group of shithead kids know his secret and Neil was ALREADY pissed at him for losing Max, this is just gonna make things so much worse and he doesn't know how to deal with any of it. Except his car is GONE, and he has no idea where anyone is or why they took the Camaro. All he does know is that he can't go home right now, and he has nowhere else to go, but he just wants to run SOMEWHERE.

He'd end up avoiding Steve for as long as he can, and quite possibly just would not return home either. I feel like it would be incredibly awkward when Steve drives the kids back to the Byers' and Billy's sitting on the porch, chain-smoking and all hunched over like he's trying not to puke. No one knows what to say for a long moment, and then Billy just shoves past everyone, flees to his car, and drives off alone. I can see him trying to live out of his car for a good couple weeks, completely shutting everyone out, until Steve tracks him down and they actually talk.

(also side note, once they work their shit out and are actually settled into a relationship, Billy would be just. The clingiest. He spent so long avoiding touching people and now that he's allowing himself to he cannot get enough. He WILL be wrapped around Steve at all times.)

First of all, I love you. Just want to get that out of the way. Thank you for blessing my inbox thusly.

Second of all, this hits like half of all my buttons. Touch-starved, posing, secretly gay Billy who's hiding his fear behind a mask of anger? SIGN ME THE FUCK UP.

You got the kids' reactions exactly right, I could picture them so clearly in my mind. And Steve too, fighting monsters while trying to understand this new soul bond (which, how would that show? How would it feel and affect them?), and Billy freaking out and just ... "step one: need car. step two: who the fuck knows" and living out of his car because he's too afraid to go home. What would Neil do? Would he find out about it or would he just be angry that Billy ... left, and didn't come back? How does the soul bond affect Billy and Steve when it is new and they are avoiding each other, is that why Billy doesn't leave Hawkins? I suppose Billy would eventually have to go home since he's underage, how would that go? AAA SO MANY QUESTIONS, MY BRAIN IS ALIGHT WITH DELIGHT

In short; I'd like to order 80K of this please. Future clinginess on the side (to be enjoyed as a dessert <3)

Also thank you for this.

[half-oz-eddie]

Journaling Billy is so personal for me.

Billy with a gratitude journal that he writes in every time something good happens, or someone does something nice for him.

He got the journal from a nurse at the hospital post-starcourt, who thought it would be a nice way for him to pass the time, while also lifting his spirits and helping him realize how much love and kindness is around him, even if he doubts it.

It's just a blue, soft cover bound book, but he humors the nurse because she's got warm, pretty eyes and reminds him of his mom.

He uses it often, even after leaving the hospital.

Steve catches him writing in his journal one day, and Billy tells him it's fine if he reads the gratitude journal but not his diary.

Steve, of course, is dying to see what's in the journal, what Billy considers nice, and what good things have been happening to the love of his life.

Aug 1, 1985 Everyone came to see me. Even those kids Harrington always babysits. That's nice, right?

Aug 5 Harrington brought me some food from some burger joint. It was good. I guess he's nice even though I was kind of a dick to him.

Aug 21 Harrington showed up to drive me home. I don't know why he's being so nice to me. It pisses me off because I think he just feels sorry for me. I'm probably using this journal the wrong way but I don't care. I can't talk to anybody about this. I'm not feeling that grateful for shit today.

Aug 25 Max helped me with my pain medication. I thought she hated me. She acts like everything's fine. I have to admit I’m grateful what happened only stays in my nightmares and I wake up to a different reality.

Aug 29 Harrington called to check on me. Offered to come over and play cards. He doesn't have to keep pretending. I like the company, though.

Sept 10th Max tried to stay home from school to look after me. I'm doing a lot better so I didn't need the help. I still don't understand why everyone's being so nice after what I did. Sept 14th Felt strong enough to go out for some air on my own. Saw Sinclair and that other kid. Think his name's Dustin. They were on their bikes. They waved and asked how I was doing. Told them I was fine and they rode off. Do I deserve their concern? Sept 15th Sinclair came back while I was on the porch. Asked for Max. I told him he couldn't be here because of Neil. We waited for Max a few houses down and talked about basketball. He's trying out for the team so I gave him some advice. It was a nice conversation. Didn't feel forced at all.

Sept 20th I told Lucas I was sorry for what happened that night. He said he'd forgotten all about it. I know the little shit was lying, but I guess he forgives me. That was cool of him.

Sept 29th Lucas made the team and thanked me for the advice. I don't feel like I did anything.

Oct 4th I'm feeling better than ever. Driving around on my own again. Nobody seems to blame me for what I did, and everyone's nice everywhere I go.

Oct 11th Went to see El. She's always kind to me. She's like the little sister I never had. She made me some waffles.

Oct 15th Saw Harrington again. It was warm so we went swimming in his pool. I really missed the water.

Oct 29th Haven't been writing much down. It feels like I'm saying the same things over and over. Everyone's always nice to me. Dad's not bothering me anymore. I feel like I have a lot of support around me. For once I feel safe. Oct 31st Went to a halloween party with Harrington. First time having a beer in months. Got a little too drunk and we kissed. He didn't seem to hate it. I didn't either.

Nov 9th Finally talked to Steve again after the kiss. He asked if I wanted to go steady. I said no at first, then changed my mind. I'm glad I did.

Steve smiled as he read every entry. Every few days, Billy's entries were longer and longer. He talked about things that made him smile, people he met, and how much he appreciated the simplest things. It was an amazing transformation. He continued to read the entries, his eyes widening when he read the most recent one. January 12th 1986 I'm falling in love with Steve. I was hoping he’d say it first but he hasn’t said anything. Maybe I’m too hopeful. He treats me like he loves me too, I think. But I’m not sure. Steve quickly closed the book, feeling like he'd violated Billy's privacy by reading something he hadn't known before. "Why so quiet, Steve? You read yesterday's entry, huh?" "I—yeah. I thought maybe you wrote it in the wrong journal."

"I didn't. I was gonna tell you, I just...I dunno. I didn't want you to think I was trying to move too fast."

Steve laughed. "You have no idea how relieved I am."

Billy narrowed his eyes. "Why?"

"Billy, I've been in love with you for weeks."

Billy snorted. "You're such a sap, pretty boy."

They shared a kiss and Billy wrote in his journal about how grateful he was, to love and be loved.

January 16th On August 21st last year, I was wrong. I have everything to be grateful for.

▪️▫️▪️

A little something to show my gratitude for reaching 400 followers. I appreciate all of you ❤️

Also tagging some friends I’ve met here that really belong in my gratitude journal for all the kindness they’ve shown lately and their posts just make me smile.

@shieldofiron @monsterpegger001 @dragonflylady77 @harringroveera @bigdumbbambieyes @brightside-of-the-upsidedown @thatgirlwithasquid

[billys-pretty-babe]

The Ceremony

Pairing : Billy Hargrove x Fem!Reader

Summary : Six months after your engagement, it's finally time to marry Billy and well, his reaction isn't what you expected whatsoever.

Warnings : Swearing, illusions to smut at the end, one mention of Neil's abuse

Word count : 2,738

A/N : Part 2 to The Proposal

April 1986

The bridal suite was busy, people working around you to do your makeup, your hair already having been in its style since early in the morning. Max huffed and puffed as she fixed her dress. "Why'd I have to be the flower girl?" You glanced at her, "Because Billy wanted you to be." Her face softened, "Oh, never mind, I love the dress, even the itchiness." Everyone in the room laughed.

You looked down at the ring on your finger, different from what Billy proposed with back in October. He had upgraded it, taking more hours at the garage he worked at. Now, it was a two and a half carat princess cut diamond ring with smaller diamonds on the band. You stared at the silver band you had bought for him with a custom engraving of the wedding date along with both of your initials, except your surname was exchanged with an H.

"Ready for the dress," Susan asked from across the room. You were reluctant to let her come to the wedding, but Billy was insistent, she was the only 'mother' figure he had but you held a grudge against her for letting Neil beat his son. You took a deep breath and nodded. Max sat in your chair, picking up the ring box. "Can I look at this?" You nodded, "Just don't take it out of the box." She nodded, studying the ring in the box as Susan helped you with the dress and you looked in the three mirrors, one directly in front of you, and two to the sides of you.

She bent down and fixed the train of the dress as you looked at the dress, seeing the way it clung to you. The dress wasn't over the top, something nice and simple for the intimate ceremony. Max put the ring box down and your mom walked into the room, smiling as she saw you. Mac hugged her and your mom smiled and hugged her back, fixing a piece of her red hair.

"Where's dad?" She smiled, "With Billy." You nodded, "Is he okay?" Your mom nodded. "More than okay, he's ready to get out there." You laughed, twisting your ring. "Getting cold feet?" You shook your head, "What if I put his ring on the wrong finger or I accidentally say I don't, you know I stutter when I get nervous." Your mom rubbed your shoulder. "It'll be okay, I promise." You nodded, pressing a hand to your stomach to calm the butterflies.

"Are you pregnant?" Everyone's eyes moved to Max and Susan gently scolded her. "Maxine, that's not a question you ask." You softly laughed, "I'm just nervous." Max hummed, lips pursed, "So, no niece or nephew yet?" You shook your head, "Not for a while." She nodded, looking in one of the full body mirrors as she fixed her dress.

"He better know I love him if I'm wearing this." Everyone laughed at her and there was a knock on the large wooden door. Your father peaked his head in, "Bridesmaids and maid of honor, the men are ready." They all nodded and left, Max staying with you. You grabbed the white basket and filled it with petals. "Aren't they supposed to be fake?" You shrugged, "All of these came from flowers he's gotten me, that's why they're all different, he's never done repeat flowers." She nodded and you gently mixed them and handed her the basket.

"Hey Max." She hummed and looked at you, "You can keep some if you want." She nodded and picked out a few petals for herself, setting them on the vanity. Your dad peaked his head back inside, "Max, they're ready for you, honey." She nodded and quickly hugged you before leaving the room. You joined your dad and he hooked his elbow with yours.

"Ready?" You nodded, "Don't let me fall." He smiled, "Never." The large doors to the church, the only way Neil would attend, opened and everyone stood up. Your eyes snapped forward to Billy at the front, one of his childhood friends right behind him as his best man, patting his right shoulder. You walked with your dad, keeping at the same pace and the closer you got, you could see the tears on Billy's cheeks.

Your dad placed your hand in Billy's before taking his seat next to your mother. You stood before Billy, smiling at him. "Thought you weren't gonna cry?" He softly laughed, whispering back to you, "I have allergies, dust is in my eyes." You quietly laughed, holding his hand. The priest went through the opening of the wedding and Billy's friend jokingly yawned and he elbowed him, making you quietly laugh, the photographer catching the moment.

The priest looked at Billy before asking him a question. "William, do you take this woman to be your wife, to live together in holy matrimony, to love her, to honor her, to comfort her, and to keep her in sickness and in health, forsaking all others, for as long as you both shall live?" Billy looked down at you, a soft smile on his lips, "I do." His old basketball friends cheered in the crowd and he looked over and laughed before looking at you.

The priest looked at you, before asking you the same question and with no hesitation, you answered, "I do." He gently squeezed your hand. "Thank God," he whispered to you and you bit back your laugh. "What? Did you think I was gonna be a runaway bride," you whispered and he shrugged, "Maybe." You both laughed. The priest had you both repeat after him, everyone cheering after each of you recited the few sentences of the pre-made vows.

The priest looked up, "May we have the rings?" Billy's aunt, guided a boy, no older than four, with the pillow with the rings. People in the crowd cooed and she lifted him up and you took Billy's band and he took your band. The boy looked at you, waving his tiny fingers as his mother took him away and Billy softly laughed.

The priest looked at Billy, instructing him to place the band on your finger. He slid your engagement ring off, placing the silver band on you before replacing the engagement ring. "Now repeat after me." He said the phrase as Billy repeated it. "I give you this ring as a token and pledge of our constant faith and abiding love."

The priest looked at you once more, instructing you to place the ring on Billy. Your fingers shook gently and Billy softly talked to you, "It's okay baby, take your time." You slid the ring onto his finger, fixing it. You were instructed to repeat the same phrase as Billy. "I give you this ring as a token and pledge of our constant faith and abiding love."

The priest shut the Bible he was holding. "I would ask you two to join hands but you've been holding hands this entire time." The room was filled with laughter from everyone, including the priest. He looked out before declaring, "By virtue of the authority vested in me under the laws of the State of California, I now pronounce you husband and wife." He looked at Billy before saying, "You may kiss the bride."

Billy smiled, "Apologies to your parents and grandparents," he whispered to you before moving his hands away from yours, using them to dip your body, right hand resting at the back of your hip, his left hand on your cheek as he leaned down and kissed you, your left hand coming up to brace his cheek as you kissed him back. "Jeez," you heard Max exclaim at the back of the church and Billy laughed against your lips, pulling away an inch or two, his blue eyes teary.

"I love you." You smiled, gently stroking his cheek with your thumb, "I love you too, B." He smiled, "Can I kiss you again?" You nodded and he kissed you once more, this kiss was less intense, filled with the same amount of love as the first but it was also shorter. He pulled you back up. "Ready, Missus Hargrove?" You smiled, "Always, Mister Hargrove." He smiled, walking down the aisle with you as everyone stood up, clapping for the two of you.

The reception was hours long, your second bouquet ending up in Max's hands, your garter remaining on, choosing to not put your parents in an uncomfortable position. The first dance was everything you thought it would be. The father-daughter, son-mother dance involved you and your father and Billy and your mother. Tommy chanted for the cake cutting, making everyone laugh as you and Billy made it to the large cake. "Holy shit." You laughed at him. Your mother gave you the knife and Billy placed His hand over yours. "How big of a piece are we cutting?" Billy shrugged, "Big enough that I won't crash later." You nodded and you both cut a big enough slice to feed each other a bite for the pictures and memories.

Instead of using a fork, he cut the small piece with his finger, making you laugh. "Open wide," you snickered, "I've heard that one before." He laughed before taking a piece between his index and his thumb, placing the piece on your tongue. The chocolate practically melted on your tongue, your teeth gently scraping the pads of his fingers and he visibly shivered at the feeling. "Cold," you jokingly questioned and he laughed. "Quite warm, actually. I think I need to take my clothes off." You laughed, gently pinching his side, "Hush, we'll get to that part later." He laughed and you grabbed the other piece of cake. "Open." He opened his mouth and you fed him the piece, wiping the icing from the corner of his lip.

Soon, it was time for the speeches, deciding to save them for the end of the night. Friends and family, besides Neil, gave speeches. Billy grabbed the mic, looking in his blazer as he grabbed a piece of notebook paper that you recognized came out of his journal from the garage. Max snuck over to you, giving you your paper and you quickly thanked her and she went back to her seat. He unfolded the paper and looked out.

"I'm young, I just turned nineteen last month." Tommy cheered and Billy laughed, making you smile. "We met in October 1984, when I arrived in Hawkins and it took me until January 1985 to ask her to be my girlfriend. We actually didn't have a lot in common at first but the more we were around each other, I saw pieces of her in me, and she was the same. I remember the exact night I kissed her, it was after a party, it was a drunken kiss but one to remember nonetheless. I knew I wanted to marry her early on, I had the ring picked out four months into dating and I received it the first week of August. We have a lot of growing to do but at least it will be together from here until our last days together decades from now." He turned to you, putting his paper down, "Thank you for loving me like I deserved, showing me it was okay to be vulnerable, showing me how to love you gently, how to care for you when you needed it most, and most of all, thank you for sticking by my side even through the times it felt like we were in Hell."

You smiled, lower lip quivering and he leaned down and kissed you softly, sweetly and you held his hair gently. "I love you," you murmured against his lips. "I love you more," he murmured back before sitting down and you grabbed the mic. "I remember the first day I saw Billy, it was the first day of school for him. He made this big entrance, the car actually caught my eye first." Everyone laughed and you smiled. "We were polar opposites, I was taught to stay away from the stuff he did but I felt so drawn to him almost instantly and I wasn't sure why. In November 1984, we had our first kiss after one of Tommy's infamous parties." Tommy cheered, "You're welcome!" Everyone laughed again. "Before Billy, there was no one else. He was and always will be my first love, my first everything. I'll admit, we're extremely young but I knew the night he kissed me that I never wanted a day to go where I didn't get to kiss him and so far, it hasn't happened."

You turned to Billy, a soft smile on your face. "My love," you addressed him, "Thank you for loving me like no one else ever will, for being gentle with me when I need it, for giving me the chance to love you, thank you for letting me be there during the hard times, and more importantly thank you for being you because if you would've had that hard ass persona that you had when we met in high school, I don't think we would be here right now. You showed me your true personality, you didn't show me Billy, you showed me who William was and for that, I'll be eternally grateful." You finished your speech and everyone clapped and you looked at Billy, his nostrils flaring, trying to keep himself from crying but nonetheless, two tiny tears fell directly onto his black pants.

Soon, it was nearing midnight and you leaned on Billy. "My feet hurt." He nodded, excusing himself from talking to Tommy's dad, taking your hand and escorting you to the bridal suite at the reception venue. You took your heels off, looking in the mirror at the two of you and Billy did the same, smile on his face. "Wanna leave? I bet they won't even know we're not here." You laughed, "Can we do that?" he pursed his lips, "It's our wedding, of course we can." You nodded. "Okay." You went to put your heels back on and Billy stopped you, picking you up bridal style, taking your heels in his other hand, making sure he had the keys to his Camaro and he left out of a side door and you laughed as you held onto his neck.

He placed you into the car, putting your heels on the floorboard, stealing a quick kiss from you before getting into the driver's side and he drove out of the parking lot. "So, what do you say we get back to the apartment and consummate this marriage?" You laughed, holding his right hand. "I was just about to pitch that idea." He laughed, bringing your hand up and kissing the knuckle of your ring finger.

It wasn't long before he was pulling into the apartment and he parked beside your car, carrying you up the cement stairs carefully as you held onto him, still laughing at him. "See, all those hours at the gym weren't pointless." You hummed, "You work on cars everyday too." He laughed, "Exactly." He unlocked the front door, carrying you over the threshold, shutting the door with his foot, dropping the keys to the ground as he beelined to the bedroom.

He set you down, leaving the room to lock the front door before coming back, blazer off, his shirt partially unbuttoned. He held your hips, looking at you in the full body mirror that was propped near the window. "This dress is pretty, but I do think it would look pretty on the floor too." You laughed, "You can take it off but be gentle, I wanna be able to wear it again when we renew our vows in a decade." He nodded, kissing your neck once before gently unzipping the back of the dress.

The thick shoulder straps fell to your arms as he stripped the dress off of you, leaving a white puddle of fabric at your feet. His jaw dropped as he saw you in the white lingerie, garter on your thigh. "You are in for a very long night, hope you got all of the sleep you wanted last night," and with that, he kept his word, filling your night with love, compassion and a mix of many other things that would leave you incredibly sore the following morning.

[intothedysphoria]

Steve was meant to be working on his confidence. Billy wasn’t helping.

Autistic skill regression had hit him pretty hard after he broke up with Nancy and what had used to be Steve just being a usual dumb jock with a social life landed him slap bang into special ed. Because he’d traded in a stealth hate watching Kalvin Garrah life of parties, hookups where he never really took his clothes off and being King Steve, to not even being able to leave his house and struggling to talk.

Billy was meant to be a social coach, whatever that meant and get him back on his feet so that he’d actually be able to go to college without having a mental breakdown. What Billy was actually doing was making Steve freak the fuck out.

He was remarkably academic, a straight A student who mouthed off just enough teachers to stay popular while helping his single mom with his younger brother Max. He was hot, fit, creative and Steve had to use an aac device to ask for a glass of water.

Even Robin liked him and Robin hated pretty much everyone. That just rubbed salt into the wound of high school hiring a friend for him.

At first, he resisted it as much as humanly possible. Every opportunity he got, Steve would give Billy the slip and crawl back into the janitors closet with his notepad and sketchbook. Then get a lecture from his parents and the principal about it being for his own good. He couldn’t just refuse to talk to people forever.

Steve decided to take that as a personal challenge.

Billy took it all in his stride of course. That was the bit that pissed off Steve the most. He could be the most bitchy King Steve diva and the guy wouldn’t even be phased. Nobody was allowed to be that perfect.

Then Steve found out about Neil. The puzzle pieces started to slot together a little easier after that.

He decided to go a little easier on Billy. Begrudgingly, they got through the worksheet about appropriate responses to the word hello (patronising drawings included) and made it onto the shopping scenario. Billy decided to take a smoke break after that.

They both smoked in silence for five minutes. It was a nice change of pace and god did Billy look hot while smoking. Steve kept that thought to himself.

He got invited to Billy’s house that night. His younger brother opened the door, rolled his eyes and yelled like a banshee until Billy came skidding across the hall, hair still wet from a shower. Probably had a date afterwards as a treat for hanging out with someone as dumb as Steve.

The hangout was mostly sitting on Billy’s bed, laughing at truly horrendous archived Instagram posts until dinner. Billy had actually made him dinner. Mac and cheese.

Steves favourite.

Things were different when Steve came back to school on the Monday. There was an invitation to sit at Billy’s table at lunch, with the cool kids. Steves old friends. He took it.

Steve had really missed Carol. She was great and seemed genuinely excited to have Steve back. Even if he’d gone nonverbal again so couldn’t really talk to her properly.

Billy was absolutely jubilant. Of course it was probably just because he wouldn’t have to be saddled with Steve for much longer, but Steve chose to believe it was because he genuinely wanted Steve to be happy.

The crush had also become rapidly apparent, much to Steve’s dismay. Billy wasn’t doing much good for the matter considering how touchy feely he’d started being. It started out with just shoulder squeezes and a friendly arm across Steve’s shoulder but then they started cuddling. Billy kissing Steve’s cheek. In school. So Steve started doing it back because he certainly wasn’t complaining and hell maybe this was how straight guys acted nowadays.

It was very confusing and looking up why is my friend kissing me just led him to a porn site. But asking why it was happening might have made it stop so Steve just didn’t.

Then Billy asked him to the prom. That was even more confusing.

So Steve did the intelligent thing and asked “like, as bros right?”

Billy appeared to be doing his best impression of a startled horse at that question so Steve made the guess that he may have committed some sort of social faux pas.

Then he very patiently explained that they’d been dating since the day of homemade mac and cheese. That put a lot of things in perspective.

Steve said yes. Billy cried.

Then Steve discovered that a gay makeout beat a “he’s just straight and this is what straight guys do now” makeout by a mile.

This fic is a gift for @dragonflylady77 who is amazing and deserves the world (for any allistics reading unfortunately school assigning you a friend if you’re autistic is a very real experience 💀)

[chrisbitchtree]

A Love Worth Fighting For

My contribution to @harringrovelovefest day 1

Prompt: Love is a battlefield

T - 1.3k

TW: Child abuse

***

Billy groans quietly as his alarm sounds at 5:45am and he rushes to turn it off before it can wake up his husband. He gives himself a moment to roll over and admire Steve’s sleeping form. He looks peaceful in a way he never does when he’s awake, rushing around the bakery they own together, or chasing their little terror of a daughter, Olive. He’s got one hand tucked under the pillow and the other drawn tight to his chest, and he’s snuffling softly, fighting off the last of the cold he’s had for the past week. Billy would give anything to be able to lay there longer, but he’s got plans.

Being up this early isn’t anything new for Billy. He’s the head baker at the bakery, so usually, by this time, he’s already been up and at it for a couple of hours. Today’s different though. It’s Valentine’s Day, and his plan is to give Steve a day of ultimate relaxation. He’s arranged for their second in command at the shop to take care of the morning bake, and he’s bribed Max and Lucas with a month of free cupcakes to watch Olive this evening, after daycare lets out for the day, so he can take Steve out to eat somewhere that doesn’t serve chicken nuggets or have a costumed mascot. It’s a high price to pay, but it’s worth it.

He only has about ten minutes before Olive will be up and barging into their room, jumping on the bed and shouting for daddy to wake up, so acting fast, he throws on a pair of sweats and runs to the bathroom to go for a quick piss before heading to Olive’s room to intercept her.

“Poppa!” she cries, her sweet voice still thick with sleep, making his heart melt as it always does.

“Quiet voice, remember?” Billy whispers, burying his nose in her nest of wild curls, almost identical to his own.

She nods, her voice solemn as she whispers “Don’t wake up daddy” in return. They’d went over this in the days prior, Billy promising that if she stayed quiet and let Steve sleep, they would swing by the bakery for donuts for breakfast before Billy dropped her off at daycare. He’s proud that she’s trying hard to keep up her end of the bargain.

He gets them both ready, and then he quickly writes Steve a note, letting him know what’s going on, and then he and Olive head out. He pulls her in her red wagon, and as she babbles on about the dog they pass and the bird in the neighbours yard, Billy gets lost in thought, thinking about everything that’s led he and Steve here.

It hasn’t been an easy road to walk down, to say the very least. First, it had been their own stupid selves keeping them apart, both too stubborn to admit that what they felt for each other was more than a friendship blossoming in the final months of Steve’s senior year of high school.

When they finally managed to both pull their heads out of their asses and explore their growing feelings, the Mindflayer had come along and turned what should have been a summer of love and lust into a hellish nightmare, Billy fighting for his life in the hospital as Steve sat by his bedside, holding his hand and sobbing quietly, praying to a god that he didn’t even believe in that Billy would be ok.

Billy did pull through, but that didn’t mean he was ok. Barely a month out of the hospital, Billy found himself back there, this time with Steve in the bed next to him, after they were caught kissing on the street corner, careless in their young love, by Neil Hargrove.

Hopper offered to chase Neil out of Hawkins, but instead, Billy and Steve decided that they were going to be the ones to leave, heading out west, to San Diego, as soon as they were well enough to go. It wasn’t all rainbows and roses in the sunshine state though. Their college years were tough, both of them working multiple jobs to put themselves through school. They had little time to spend together, and that combined with Steve’s father near constantly bribing him to return to Indiana and work for him, which caused Billy to worry that Steve was going to pick money and job security over him, put a lot of strain on their relationship.

Steve’s reassurances that he would always choose Billy did little to tamp down Billy’s concerns, and only a year out of college, the strain of everything got to be too much and they split, and Steve did return home to work for his father for a time, a self fulfilling prophecy.

It was devastating for both of them, Billy sick with grief as he watched Steve back the moving van out of the driveway, and Steve almost driving off the road, barely able to see through his tears, but they’d both convinced themselves that this was for the best.

Months went by, and they both tried to rebuild their lives, difficult as it was without their better halves. Steve found therapy, not in an office, but at Hopper and Joyce’s small kitchen table, drinking tea late into the night as he spilled all his fears and regrets, his insecurities, and how deeply his love for Billy still ran, in spite of all the challenges they had.

Billy found his love of baking, working through cakes and muffins, cookies and pies, before trying every kind of bread known to man. He also found a renewed love of surfing, spending every early morning that he wasn’t working in a small bakery downtown out on the ocean.

He talked to the waves, working through the fears and anxiety swirling in his mind. He also talked to the other surfers as they dried off on the shore, let them talk him into going to a party, where he drank too much, as he was known to do when he was nervous.

He found himself in bed that night with a beautiful girl, Kathleen, letting the drinks in his system falsify passion for one night. Just one night and they would part as friends, both of them moving on, her back to LA for her last year of college, and Billy back together with Steve after a lot of heartfelt discussions and promises to do better this time around.

Armed with an investment from Steve’s parents, who ultimately just wanted their son to be happy, Billy and Steve purchased the bakery that Billy was working at when the owner fell ill, and his family decided it was too much to try to keep it going.

All was well for a time, both men falling back into their relationship and into their roles as business owners. They were happier and more in love than ever when they received a call from Kathleen, pregnant with no desire to be a mother, but wanting to give Billy the chance to parent if he wanted it, a chance he might not otherwise get.

He did, both he and Steve did. Wonderful, sweet, loving Steve, who immediately accepted Olive as his own, and vowing that she would grow up feeling nothing but love. He’d made good on that vow, they both had, the three of them the most solid family unit Billy had ever known.

Things weren’t always perfect. They would argue over how to parent Olive, or how to run the business, or have petty squabbles over who’s turn it was to do the dishes or run the laundry. Love is a battlefield, but they would never stop fighting for their love.

Dropping Olive off at daycare, Billy raced home, eager to get back to Steve and start their day together, love and warmth filling his heart.

[ellewritesandrants]

I don’t know why but the idea of a soulmate AU between Billy, Steve and Eddie captivates me, especially with the idea that Billy unknowingly gets Steve and Eddie to find out that they’re soulmates. Either in a modern AU where Billy’s a big fan of Corroded Coffin and Steve just managed to get a free ticket or something or in a canon AU where Billy and Steve are friends who want to smoke a little something so they buy from Eddie or Steve picks up the kids from Hellfire and one of them notices the marks match, I don’t really care how but I just want to explore the hurt and comfort of that.

Can you imagine Billy pining away, forever in love with the idea of his soulmate being the one who’ll save him from his situation given that’s what happened to his mom and he finds out that his crush is his soulmate but doesn’t want to tell him yet until he’s made something out of himself, until he’s deserving of love and all of a sudden, he finds out that his soulmate found his soulmate and it wasn’t Billy?

Imagine Steve happily dragging Eddie with him who already looks besotted with Steve and they show Billy the mark that he’s memorized from seeing it in the mirror thousands of times and as soon as he sees the smiles on their faces and the look of wonder in their eyes, he knows for a fact he can’t ruin their happiness. He isn’t selfish enough to do it even others would say he was and all he could do was pretend to be happy and smile at the happy couple.

Imagine Billy pulling away, either out of fear he’d inadvertently ruin their relationship or because he couldn’t stand being surrounded by what he couldn’t have and the kids weirdly enough noticing and trying to figure out what’s wrong. It doesn’t help that Neil’s always been bitter about soulmates and he loved rubbing it in Billy’s face how worthless everything regarding soulmates and soulmarks was. Billy used to be able to ignore it in the hopes of finding his soulmate but now, he knew the truth.

The kids come to a different conclusion, not realizing it was something regarding soulmates but instead, about Neil’s treatment of Billy. If canon, it would be El spying on Billy and seeing him being beaten into a pulp by his dad but in a modern AU, it would the aftermath wherein Max would ask Steve to come visit Billy and he drags Eddie along with him.

Either way, Steve and Eddie find out about the abuse that Billy’s been suffering through and the guilt that Steve felt was immeasurable for not seeing what his best friend was going through, too busy with being in love with his soulmate. With Hopper’s help, they get Neil behind bars but Billy’s a wreck and he needs people to take care of him.

Steve refused to leave Billy alone in the trailer while Max went to school and Susan went to work so he offered to have Billy move in with him and Eddie so they could take care of him. Since Steve only worked part-time and Eddie was in the same year as Billy and could drive them to and from school, it made a lot more sense than leaving him to his own devices.

Billy thinks he’s in a new level of hell as time goes by because getting to know Eddie and seeing everything he can’t have was absolutely painful and heartbreaking on another level. Being surrounded by their care and affection when he’s barely known it his entire life hurts on another level he can’t exactly describe but it’s a pain that hurts so good that he can’t exactly say no to it. His only saving grace is that his mark was casted over due to Neil’s last temper tantrum and there was no way that the boys would get to see it.

Months pass of Billy falling more and more in love with his soulmates who are already in love with each other and it hurts so good. Steve and Eddie never make him feel like an outsider the entire time he’s there but sometimes, his touch starvation reminds him of just how much he’d love to be squeezed in between them in any way possible.

Graduation comes and goes and Billy refused to let his father take his achievements away so he graduated valedictorian, dragging Eddie kicking and screaming past the finish line to graduate. Billy gets to make his speech, loudly supported by everyone and he makes sure to thank his newfound family for all of the support they’ve given him.

Of course, graduation wouldn’t be complete without a graduation party so they all get drunk and party in Steve’s house to celebrate six graduations especially Billy and Nancy who graduated valedictorian and salutatorian respectively. Both Jonathan and Nancy planned to go to the same college in Chicago while Robin and her girlfriend, Heather were heading to California soon. Billy had also gotten into the same college but he wasn’t sure about going because he’d be leaving so much behind, including his soulmates.

By now, Billy was in love with both of his soulmates and unbeknownst to him, they were both plently enamored with him and they’d been trying to build up the courage to ask him out. The party had been slightly delayed because Billy was getting his casts off about a week after graduation and they wanted to do shots, something that really wasn’t advisable with a cast.

Billy had planned to initially conceal his mark using makeup but a large part of him knew that it didn’t matter since Steve and Eddie were happy anyway so he didn’t bother. After all, both Steve and Eddie loved to show off their marks at every opportunity and no one gave a shit about Billy. Somehow, Billy had managed to keep his mark a secret from everyone but he knew Heather had some suspicions.

After some time, the drinking games start and somehow, Billy’s mark is revealed either in a dared striptease or by accident during a dare and it quickly sobers him up. He doesn’t notice at first but then Robin drunkenly pointed out that they had matching marks and the sober gaze of Eddie was too sharp for Billy to meet, instead choosing to run away, stumble to his car and hit the gas to the quarry.

It’s only there that he allows himself to breakdown and to mourn the end of what was a good friendship he had going on with his soulmates because he was sure they would want nothing to do with him now. He’s only just begun to run out of tears when he hears the telltale sound of Eddie’s van, meant to drive Nancy, Jonathan, Heather and Robin home later but was most likely currenly holding the last people Billy wanted to see.

For a moment, he considers running again but his Mama didn’t raise no coward, so he wipes his tears and stands his ground. Steve was a lot drunker than Billy was when Billy had left but it seemed he’d sobered up during the ride because he was clear-eyed when he was grabbing Billy and making sure that the blond wouldn’t run away.

Steve and Eddie trapped Billy in between them, in what seemed like a mockery of his fantasies only to have them play out right in front of him. Never in his wildest dreams did he think that his soulmates would tell him that they wanted him, that they loved him and wanted to take care of him and love him. Sure, it was after an argument about why Billy felt the need to hide but he had expected rejection or at the very least a mutual ignorance of his mark. He’d never considered it a possibility but the two were convinced to try and convince him to give them a chance.

After more than a few tears and attempts to get them to realize they were better off without Billy and his baggage, Steve and Eddie stubbornly managed to convince Billy to try with them. A few kisses convinced Billy to leave his car behind so that they could get it in the morning but for now, Steve and Eddie wanted him in Eddie’s van so they were sure he wouldn’t run.

The entire ride, Billy’s mind was trying to convince him that Steve and Eddie were better off without him, that he didn’t deserve this and that he was a fraud ruining a perfectly happy couple but Steve instinctively knew something was up and he’d had Billy laid across his lap with his hair being stroked to keep the bad thoughts away while Steve affirmed Billy of all of their feelings towards him.

Halfway through the ride home, Billy was asleep and Steve had no problem carrying the younger boy into their bed so that they could finally hold him the way they wanted to. Billy had long since told them of how lonely he felt in his room but as much as they had wanted to invite Billy to literally sleep with them, they hadn’t wanted to cross any boundaries.

Tonight though, all Steve and Eddie wanted to do was to fall asleep holding their newly found soulmate. Billy awoke to Steve’s warmth cocooning him and Eddie coming in to wake him with breakfast in bed. After a hearty meal, Steve and Eddie asked if they could court Billy to show him how serious they were about their feelings for him and Billy found that much like before, he couldn’t say no to his soulmates.

Months passed with Steve and Eddie constantly trying to prove their love of Billy who eventually concedes and moves in with them in the master bedroom. It isn’t long until having Billy in between Steve and Eddie is a norm and no longer a fantasy for Billy and he realizes just how much he didn’t let himself have when he hated himself. With Steve and Eddie’s love, they helped Billy realize he was always worthy of love, care and devotion and that they were ready to spend the rest of their lives together reminding him of that fact.

[pinkkinoko]

That one time Billy told Max he, too, had a nerd boyfriend

The sound of the front door opening and closing let Billy know that Max was back from Lucas’s house, she was holding a milkshake in one hand and had her skateboard tucked up under her other arm. She propped the skateboard up against the wall and made her way to the kitchen, flinging her backpack onto the sofa as she went.

Billy was leaning against the counter, eating a sandwich and flipping through a magazine. He was wearing his reading glasses, something nobody believed he even owned. One time, when she was late getting to the movies, Max had offhandedly explained that it was because Billy was giving her shit since he was convinced she’d touched his glasses. The truth was he just couldn’t find them because he’d left them at Eddie Munson’s house. Lucas just looked weirded out, and Mike had yelled “He reads?”

To which Dustin had replied: “It’s probably just playboy magazines…”

Billy didn’t really wear his glasses around anyone—though it looks like now he wore them around Eddie—and he was actually a pretty big reader. To be fair, she never thought Billy read anything other than the road signs—and that was just so he could do the opposite of what they said. But Billy read a lot; she noticed it a few weeks after Neil had moved in, though he didn’t read out in the open. She’d caught the scene by chance as she was skating back from the boardwalk, Billy’s car was parked in a relatively empty space, his eyes fixed on a heavy book about what she later found out was marine biology.

It was the first time she’d seen him look quiet.

Not bored, or angry, or lazy; not wound up like when he was with his friends, or dangerous like when he was at the dinner table. For once, he just looked quiet, and she thought that maybe, just for that moment, he seemed like every other dumb high school sophomore she’d ever seen.

She was surprised by the glasses, he’d always been pretty, but now he even looked somewhat boyish—if she imagined him with a different hairstyle, one less ambitious and more subtle, she could even see him as a nerdish bookworm.

Still, as she had passed quietly by his car, she could hear the faint sound of his favorite metal tracks playing from the speaker. It was like a reminder, at that time, that he was still Billy, all hard-edged and dangerous.

Things had gotten better, between them, after Neil left. So many things had happened over the summer in Hawkins, especially after Billy got fed-up with lifeguard duty—and Neil—and took a road trip back home to Cali. She’s kind of glad that Billy hadn’t been there, not just because shit had hit the fan with the whole upside-down shit-show, but because of what had happened to Heather, too.

Things between her and Billy weren’t kittens and rainbows, even if they’d gotten better, but the thought of what happened to Heather possibly happening to Billy too—

It made her feel like razors were scraping all down her back.

“Oh no way—what are you wearing?”

Max stood on the threshold, between the carpeted living room of the trailer and the tiled kitchen area, noticing for the first time the dumb shirt she’d had the bad luck of seeing everywhere lately; the glaring words “hellfire club” written in bold across the front.

“Shut up Max, it’s a lame fucking shirt, I can wear lame shit too, alright.”

Billy didn’t bother to look up from the magazine, Max had a feeling it was mostly because he knew she would give him the biggest shit-eating grin in all of Hawkins—and he wouldn’t be able to say anything back. Max thought the shirt was the stupidest thing, and so she knew Billy had to think the same. They disagreed on way too many things to keep track of, but call it a sibling-sense, she just knew he agreed with her on this.

“My boyfriend is in that dumb club and he couldn’t pay me to wear that thing, what bet did you lose?”

The magazine slapped against Billy’s thigh as he let his arm fall forward, an annoyed sigh leaving his mouth.

“Yeah, well mine’s the fucking president, Max. Don’t get used to it, same thing I told Eddie, it’s a one time thing.”

Max had seen Billy kissing Eddie once, it was late and she’d gone out to feed the dog. She saw Billy getting out of Eddie’s van and following him up the steps into his trailer. Before they’d gone inside, Eddie had turned to say something that they’d both laughed at before Billy pulled him down into a kiss.

She’d be lying if she said she wasn’t caught off guard—it made her rethink a whole feature-film’s worth of stuff in her memory—but after the initial shock wore off, she was left with mixed feelings.

She didn’t really like Munson. Sure, Lucas seemed to think he was alright, and Dustin had pretty much found a new older brother in the guy, but she still wasn’t really convinced.

Not to mention Mike liked him, which was not good advertising; the only good choice Mike had ever made was El, and he still managed to royally fuck that up.

Maybe she was worried whatever issues Billy had, they’d only get worse with Munson around. Saying Munson was a “bad influence” felt like she was pushing Billy around in a stroller; that kind of sentiment was reserved for sweet, over-protective moms who kept track of curfews and supper-times, women like Mrs. Byers.

Still, maybe because it looked like things could actually start to work between her and Billy, Max felt nervous.

Turns out she didn’t really have anything to be nervous about. If anything, Billy mellowed out after meeting Munson, she can’t say it’s not 80% weed, but even 20% feels like miles compared to before. Apparently, the guy can even get Billy to wear the dumbest shirt on the planet, so maybe he’s not that bad after all.

He can even get Billy to date.

Max didn’t even know Billy knew what that word meant, she’d only seen him switching through girls faster than he drove, but maybe she was just looking at it wrong from the start.

Either way, she was happy for him. There was still a ton of shit to work through before she could really feel herself around Billy, she’s sure it was the same for him, but the point was that they had time now.

That’s more than could be said for a lot of people after Starcourt; people like Jim Hopper.

“Well, I guess it looks alright on you.”

He raised an eyebrow at her, and there was a tiny millisecond in which Max was scared again, that maybe he’d snap at her—that maybe Neil was going to walk in the room with her mother on his arm, looking small and timid all over again. But it didn’t happen, Billy’s lips gave a little pull to the right, a smirk, and he bit back;

“Everything looks good on me, Max, even this nerd shit.”

He then went back to reading his magazine, and as she opened the fridge to grab something to snack on, she found a sandwich saran-wrapped and sitting on a plate. She knew it wasn’t her mom, not just because she wasn’t even home since this morning, but because the sticky note on top of it that read “Max” was in Billy’s handwriting.

She smiled, they’d be alright, somehow; if it was the three of them, they could do it.

Billy did, by the way, keep wearing that shirt. It was only around the house, or when he knew nobody but Max would see him in it, but she could tell he liked it.

God, her brother had horrible taste.

[imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl]

The One I've Been Waiting For {Part 04 of 13}

Pairing: Billy Hargrove X Older!reader

Word count: 2 K

Summary: Billy Hargrove is just one of the many students you're supposed to help. The last thing you expect from your interaction is that he'll start flirtt with you... Much less that Billy would stir up feelings you'd rather keep hidden. Despite the mutual sentiments that soon enough start to grow, there are a lot of reasons for whatever it is to be left alone, and one of them is your age...

<- Previous part (03)

Next Part (05) ->

{Stranger Things Masterlist}

A/N: In this story, reader is 5 years older than Billy, who's 18.

•••

The Heart and the Mind

Billy's mind is a chaotic place. But this time is for a whole different reason. It's been a while since he got together with a girl, and he doesn't even miss it. He did think about it more than a few times, but every time he considers it... All he can think about is her.

“Billy!” Max suddenly yells, snapping him out of his thoughts. With an angry face, he glances at her.

“What the hell, shitface?”

“What's wrong with you? Why are you acting so weird?” Max asks, and he rolls his eyes, focusing on the road.

“I'm normal.” Shrugging his shoulders, Billy checks his face through the review mirror. There's nothing wrong with him.

“No, you're not. You're more stupid than usual. And less angry.” She goes on, and Billy runs a hand through his head before hanging an arm on the open window. “It looks like you have something in your head.”

“Max, shut the hell up.” He mutters, taking a deep breath. “Care about your own business and leave me alone.”

“Fine, whatever.” She mumbles.

He was just about to lash out at her again when he remembers what (Y/N) said. Billy was never too fond of Max, and he doesn't want her to be one more thing he has to care about. But they were both forced into each other's lives, and she also has to deal with Neil. Of course, she doesn't see the worst side of him, since she's Susan's daughter. But part of Billy, a tiny little part is happy she's not the one being beaten up. Thinking about it now, imagining Neil hitting Max, makes him angry. Furious.

“What about that shitty boyfriend you have?” He asks, eyes on the road.

“What about him?”

“Damn it, Maxine. Is he treating you ok? Because if he ever does anything I'll have to end his miserable life.” He's finally at the Elementary School, stopping the car. “We're family now, it doesn't matter how we feel about it, so if anyone screws up with you, it's my business too.”

“You're going crazy.” She mumbles before opening the door.

“Maybe I am.” He whispers to himself, ignoring how she pushes the door close.

Driving fast, he makes his way to Hawking High School for more endless hours of bullshit. Billy can't take this anymore, not here at least. He was never into school, but back in Cali, at least he was home, in a place he loved. But here, he has nothing.

Nothing but a girl stuck in his head. A girl whose smile is burned in his memory, that he plays back all the time. Billy acts like he doesn't have a heart, but (Y/N) certainly makes him feel as if it's beating again. Maybe for the first time in his life.

—————

You've been quite off the whole morning, not paying attention to anything. Lucky for you, today's class is just about the presentations of last month's projects, and since your group was the first one, you had the privilege of sitting in the back and letting your mind float away from this place.

The thing you don't want to think about is the only thing you think about. Or better said, the person.

Billy has been going through your mind on a daily basis, ever since you last met him when you went to the quarry. You did cross paths with him at school, and he was nice, asking how your day was. With kind eyes and a beautiful smile.

And now, the man has been constantly in your head. Night and day, even though you've been struggling not to. And you like thinking about him. You even miss him, looking down at you with those blue eyes.

“(Y/N),” Tanya calls, and you snap out of your thoughts, noticing that the class is over. “Where are you? You didn't even pay attention to the project's presentation.”

“Yeah, I...” Gathering your stuff, you follow Tanya outside. “I was just thinking.”

“About what?”

“Nevermind, Tany. It's stupid.”

“Well–”

“How is my beautiful girlfriend doing?” The voice is quickly followed by a sudden hug. Liam has one arm around Tanya and the other around your shoulders. He kisses her before placing a kiss on your cheek. “And my beautiful bestie?” You wrinkle your noise at his word and the high pitched voice he usually uses.

“Your bestie has a boy in her head.” Tanya singsongs, and you roll your eyes. “I have to go to the restroom. Be right back.” Kissing Liam again, she waves at you and walks away.

“So you finally met someone you're interested in?” Liam asks as you move to one of the wooden benches set near the walls.

“Let's sit there.”

The wind is stronger than earlier today, making the tree's branches bend over. The campus is beautiful, and as you sit down, pulling your legs up, you watch as people come and go. The exposed skin of your shoulders makes you feel cold, but you ignore it. You like it here, it's far better than the one in Indianapolis. There's more nature, and the campus is full of trees and bushes, and even a garden on the East side. Things move slower here in Hawkings, but you like it.

“So? Who's this guy?”

“Liam, I need a guy's opinion on something.” Crossing your legs, you turn towards him.

“Bring it on.”

“How would you feel if Tanya was older than you?”

Liam furrows his eyebrows, getting a thoughtful expression for a while. He seems quite surprised by your question. “Well, if was still Tanya, I'd fall for her anyway.” He says, nodding to himself. “I mean, the dynamic would be different. Let's say that by her age she could have children or even an ex-husband. And the years of experience would probably make a gap in between us and if we're from different generations we'd like different things but–”

“Children and ex-husband?” You cut him off, not able to follow up with whatever he's saying.

“Yeah. The probabilities are that she'd at least have one past long-term relationship.”

Closing your eyes for a few seconds to gather your thoughts, you take a deep breath. “Liam, let me rephrase that. What if Tanya was, let's say... Five years older than you?” That's way too specific. “Would you still like her? Or even consider dating her?”

Liam gives you a look, raising one eyebrow. “Here I am, analyzing every aspect and challenge of a relationship with an age gap and you were speaking about five years?” You silently nod. “That's not even a gap. That's just a couple of years, no big deal.”

“It's just that... When the guy is older everyone finds it hot.” You start, looking down at your hands. You shouldn't even be talking about this, since Billy Hargrove isn't even a possibility. But this is just something you need to know, something you need someone else's opinion on. And Liam, being a guy, gives you a better perspective. “But when it's the other way around... People find it weird.”

“(Y/N), age is just a number.” He's still speaking when Tanya comes back, sitting next to him. “Correction. After eighteen, age is just a number. You're both adults and it doesn't matter what people say, only what you feel. And you don't even look your age, people wouldn't even spot the age difference.”

“What makes you think I'm talking about me?” You're quick to defend yourself, stuttering a little.

“Because you were way too specific for this to be a hypothetical situation or about someone else.” Liam exchanges a look with Tanya, who smiles.

“You know you don't have to hide things from us.” She says, reaching out a hand, which you hold. “We're here to help and support you. And if something happens between you and Billy we'll be happy for–”

“Nothing will happen.” Cutting her off, you sigh. “I just needed Liam's opinion on it. I was curious, that's all.”

“Look, the only problem I see with you getting into a relationship with Billy is his reputation.” Tanya starts, and Liam nods. They don't have much contact with Billy, but, like everyone who lives in Hawkins, they heard about him. “He's a bad boy, gets all the girls he wants, and throws them away when he's done. You're not into that kind of thing.”

“You're a hopeless romantic,” Liam adds.

“Exactly. So be careful.”

“I will.” You whisper, running a hand through your hair.

After another class, Tanya drives you to Hawkins High School where you attend this girl, Clarissa. A quick rain came and passed during the time you were with her in the classroom. But by the time you're done, the sun is trying to win over the thick, grey clouds taking over.

You're walking through the halls next to Clarissa, chatting. She's kind, and despite not being that good at Biology, you can see she's trying her best. “I'm way too nervous for this test. I need at least a C.”

“You'll do fine. I can make you a quiz if you want, to help you go over the topics again.” You offer as you move outside, the cold wind making you shiver.

“That would be amazing, thanks!” She cheers, giving you a quick hug before waving and heading to her car.

You go to the public phones since you need Tanya to pick you up. But after calling twice, you're almost giving up.

“Hey.” The sound makes you turn around, putting the phone back in place. Billy smiles, and you can't help but do the same.

“Hi.” You shyly say. “How have you been?” Talking to Billy is different now. You have ideas in your head, ideas you know you shouldn't have. “What are you doing here so late?”

“Basketball game.”

“Did your team win?”

“Of course.”

“That's great.” Taking the phone again, you try calling one more time. But she doesn't answer. “Shit.”

“Something wrong?”

“No, it's just–” Putting the phone back, you start walking, bracing yourself. “–Tanya was supposed to come for me but her telephone must be broken again.”

“Here,” Billy says, and when you look at him, you find the guy taking off his jacket.

“No, you don't have to–” He's already handing it over to you. “I'm alright, really.”

He doesn't say anything, and when it takes too long for you to move, Billy puts the jacket around your shoulders. You're immediately surrounded by warmth, and also his scent. It's familiar now, even though you don't spend too much time around him. But it makes you feel... Odd. In a good way.

“Thanks.” You whisper, stepping back and clearing your throat. “I gotta go now. Before the rain catches me.” With a little wave, you start walking again.

But Billy is quick to grab your arm, gently. “Do you really think I'll let you walk home with a storm coming?” As if to make his point clear, a distant thunder echoes.

“Billy...” You don't want to go with him. Being around Billy is dangerous, it brings out feelings you don't understand. Feelings you don't want to think about.

“(Y/N), C'mon. It's just a ride home.” The grip on your arm slips until he's holding your hand. It sends some kind of wave through your arm, like electricity.

You're moving before you notice, following him.

“Hey, Billy boy!” Someone shouts, and you give the guy a quick look before going for the passenger door. “Saturday at my place! It's gonna be wild, don't forget.”

“I won't.” He answers as you get inside, putting the seatbelt on. Billy is quick to settle down, turning the ignition. “Party on Saturday. Wanna come?”

“I can't. My group will come to my place to work on some papers.”

“Is it true or you just don't wanna go out with me?” Billy hits the street, and you struggle to deal with the anxiety. But it doesn't take much until you notice the... Normal speed. A lot different from last time.

“It's true.” You simply say, feeling yourself relaxing.

“So... Does that means you'd go out with me some other time?” Billy glances at you, and you feel your cheeks blushing.

You're supposed to say no immediately, make it clear this is just a ride home. That you're just... Friends. But why didn't the words come out? It would be so much easier... “Billy, you know we-”

“Mhmm, the age thing.” He cuts you off, a smirk in his voice. “Why don't you do the most simple thing?”

“Which is?”

“Ask if I care about it.” He's already staring when you look at him.

“Eyes on the road.” You warn him, and he smiles before complying. It's getting hard to deal with all this. Billy doesn't get out of your head, and you were hoping whatever this is, it would fade away. That time would help. But here you are again, with him, and all the walls separating between you are crumbling down... And you like it. You want to take them all down. But you are a thinker, and you're scared. None of the guys you were interested in before made you feel this way. But why now? Why Billy?

You just want to get home and stay the hell away from him and all the feelings he causes.

“Alright, Princess.” He sighs.

“Don't call me that.”

“Why not?”

“Well, do you?” You burst out, almost involuntary. Your heart and mind are at war, and both want to win.

Billy smiles, slowing down for the red light until he stops completely. Then, he looks at you, those blue eyes almost hypnotizing you. They're powerful... Or are you the one who's too weak?

“You're the only girl I ever met that I really want to know.” He says, voice low and deep, sending shivers down your spine. “So no. I don't give a damn about your age, Princess.”

You're frozen, still looking at him when someone blasts the horn, and you snap out, seeing that the light is green. “Some other time then... Maybe.” You whisper, clearing your throat and running a hand through your hair.

Your heart is beating fast, cheerful to know how he feels about it. But your mind... It tells you otherwise.

@aunicornmademedoit @alexa4040 @goth-cowgirl-03 @nyctophilic0vitnir @minispice-1

[artiststarme]

What if Steve died instead of Chrissy?

Here's just a short thing that came to mind. I hope you guys like it and please leave your thoughts in the comments!

~*~*~*~

After the events of Starcourt, the whole Party fractured. They all dealt with the trauma of the Mindflayer and the Russians differently. With Hopper gone, El had no choice but to leave Hawkins with the Byers. Joyce had no interest in staying in the place that had taken so much from her and her boys. As soon as they were finished packing their things, she bustled them all to Lenora Hills in California, the furthest place from Hawkins she could think of. Without Jonathan there to ground her, Nancy threw herself into journalism and school work. After all, she needed to have control over something in her life.

Max pulled away from everyone, she didn’t have time for the childish games she once enjoyed. Not when she was taking care of her alcoholic mother and moving into a new trailer after Billy died and Neil left. And she had no interest in grieving her brother that no one liked, with the company of anyone in the Party. Dustin, Lucas, and Mike placed all of their attention into joining the DnD club at school. They didn’t want to experience any reminders of the Upside Down or the events of the summer so they focused on fantasy instead. Robin was coddled by her parents and grounded for weeks after Starcourt burnt down. They wouldn’t let her leave their sight for weeks out of fear of losing here. 

All of that meant Steve was alone. 

For months, Steve stayed in his room grieving the loss of the guy that had become his father figure. He mourned the loss of his fun times at Scoops Ahoy and the innocence he had before being tortured by Russians. He could never be the guy that he was before being tortured mercilessly and stumbling the line so close to death. Some of the Party reached out to him but trying to talk to him grew too challenging eventually and they gave up. Robin and Dustin, despite being his best friends, couldn’t deal with his problems on top of their own. 

Steve’s nights were filled with nightmares and his days were full of sadness. He was in a pitiful cycle that he couldn’t break. Usually, he would go to Hopper when things got really bad. Hop would manhandle him back to the cabin for movies, games, and Eggos with El, and he would keep him there until Steve could pull himself back. But, he didn’t have that option anymore. 

What did Steve have? He didn’t have parents that cared, friends that noticed his months-long absence, or a father figure that wasn’t dead. All he had was himself, his depression, and a cold, empty house.  

It was only a matter of time before he started looking for new ways to cope. He drank all of his father’s alcohol, he drove to bars in Indy to pick up partners, he even sat on the edge of the quarry in an effort to feel something, but nothing seemed to work. Eventually, he saw Eddie Munson walking home from school one day and something sparked in his mind. 

Eddie dealt drugs! Drugs would definitely get him out of his head, right?

Steve was desperate at that point. His nightmares kept getting more vivid and the terrors seemed to follow him into the daytime. His head ached all of the time and his nose was bleeding from the pressure inside his head. He needed something to deal with it all. 

So he met Eddie at his usual spot behind the school one day and tried to make a deal. Unfortunately, Eddie only carried weed with him but Steve made arrangements to go to his trailer after the championship game to get something harder. He was so excited to finally get rid of the headaches and the grief that plagued him that he didn’t mind going to the trailer to get it.  

But when Eddie tried to sell him the ketamine that night, he had to watch the golden boy Steve Harrington levitate in his trailer. He had to watch as the bones of his high school crush cracked and splintered. He had to see Steve’s eyes get sucked through his skull by an unseen force. 

And later he had to watch the world move on from the inside of a jail cell when he was charged for the murder he never in a million years would have committed.

Eddie shot up from his bed in a daze. He was still on his stained mattress at the trailer, surrounded by his clutter. It was just a dream. He was sure that Steve Harrington was still safe and sound up in his castle and whatever the fuck nightmare his brain had conjured up was just that... a nightmare. Stuff like that didn't happen in real life, he was fine. And Steve probably was too. It was fine.

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[ten-opinions]

I know people aren’t going to listen to me, but you guys have got to stop comparing two completely different characters’ trauma.

Jonathan and Billy do not share the same trauma.

In fact, they are the exact opposites. Yes, both had abusive fathers. Fine. But that’s about it. Their similarities end there. See, Jonathan had one thing that Billy didn’t. Proper support.

Joyce didn’t decided to leave Jon with Lonny and disappear from his life forever. Jon was not left in an abusive household with absolutely so form of support. Joyce, instead, left Lonny, took her kids with her, and was trying her best to be a good single mother to her two young boys. Jonathan still had his mother and his brother to guide and support him.

Billy didn’t. His mother straight up abandoned him with his abusive father. I don’t know how many of you know what typically happens in those situations, but here’s how it goes. When there are two victims and one of them gets free, the abuser doubles down on the abuse of the victim still in their care. They want the remaining victim to think there’s no way they’re going to get free, so they tend to abuse the victim more frequently. Billy, already hurt from being abandoned, is suddenly alone and dealing with even more abuse than he was originally dealing with. You could argue that he did have support through Max at one point, but he pushed her away. Now, I haven’t read Runaway Max yet, but from what I understand Billy was getting beat worse due to Max trying to help. This was not Max’s fault by any means, but her help wasn’t actually helping. If anything it gave Neil even more leverage to abuse Billy into the mindset that he would never be helped or loved.

(Also, I’m not going to go into it in this post but, Max and Billy didn’t have the same trauma either. You can live in the exact same household and go through extremely different things.)

Jonathan Byers and Billy Hargrove did not go through the same trauma. Jonathan had a safe space. Billy never did.

[ihni]

He doesn't remember his mother's face.

He has knowledge of what she looked like - knows that she had long blonde hair and freckled skin and a kind smile - but when he closes his eyes, he can't picture her. It's been years, and he has no photographs left of her; Neil threw them all out. He thinks (wants to think) that he would recognize her if he ever saw her again, but there is a nagging thought whispering what if you don't? In that regard, it was almost a relief to move to Hawkins. At least here, he won't risk seeing her in the streets and walk past his own mother because he doesn't know her face anymore.

He also doesn't remember his mother's voice.

Her voice was the first thing about her that he forgot. He knows what she used to tell him, has written down a few things he doesn't want to forget, but he can't imagine the words being said by her. There was a song that she used to sing to him before putting him to bed when he was little - a song they'd made up themselves, made out of mostly nonsense words - and he remembers the song itself. Remembers the notes and the words. But when he hums it to himself at night, curled up in bed and long after everyone else has gone to sleep, all he can hear is himself.

He doesn't remember what his mother smelled like.

When she'd just left, he snuck one of the dresses she left behind into his room before Neil could throw it out, and hid it under his pillow. He remembers taking comfort in the vague scent of her perfume - something flowery and sweet - even though it faded and was gone in only a couple of days. Just as well, really, because Neil found the dress and took it away, slapped him and called him a pussy for crying about it. Told him that it was his fault his mom left, for having such a pathetic excuse for a son.

He can't recall if his mother was ever proud of him.

He knows she used to follow him to the beach when he was little, and stay in the sand while he played in the water. He would wave at her from his board when he'd managed to stay on it, and she would wave back from the shore. Her dress flowing in the breeze, her hair golden under the sun, her smile ... Because she was smiling, wasn't she? Staying on the board might not have been that impressive a feat for a grown woman, but surely she would have been smiling - to indulge him, if nothing else. Right?

He doesn't know if his mother ever really loved him at all.

She must have, at some point. She fed him, sang to him, watched over him as he played. Acted as a buffer between him and Neil, and kept him safe. Well. For a while, at least. Because eventually, she left. You don't leave someone you love, Billy thinks. Maybe she was all out of love at that point. Maybe there was never really there to begin with. Maybe she only fed him and watched over him and stood between him and Neil because of some sort of sense of obligation. A chore, not love. Billy knows all about that. He's doing the same now, with Max. He doesn't love her, but he doesn't want her to get hurt. The difference between him and his mom, is that he can't make himself leave. And if he can't even leave a snot-nosed brat who's not even his real sister ... Then his mother probably never truly loved him. Probably barely tolerated him, just like Neil says.

Sometimes, he's not sure his mother existed in the first place.

She feels like a dream. A concept. Something fractured and broken and impossible to put back together into something whole. He knows she existed but he doesn't remember. His memories are filtered through years of pain and fear, through layers upon layers of harsh words and vitriol. He tries to imagine her as the mother he hopes she was, but that person is a stranger now. Impossible for him to relate to. He is motherless. He grieves, and he yearns, for something he might very well never have had. Something he will never have again.

And he misses her.

[groovinrightalong]

Do u have any trans masc Max Mayfield headcanons?

I haven’t thought much about it but now I have so MANY thoughts!

-Max hasn’t had a lot of positive relationships with the men in his life, so it takes a long while for the “hm I don’t feel quite right” to click. He doesn’t feel super comfortable as a girl, but he looks at his step-dad and Billy and is like “well I don’t want to be anything like that, so this has to be okay.”

-He definitely knows more about gender/sexuality stuff than the others because of growing up in California. So he’s thought a lot about it over the years, but just kept coming to the conclusion that he’s a tomboy (again, no positive relationships with men.)

-It’s actually because of Lucas (and the rest of the Party, by extension) that he really starts to get more comfortable with the idea. Because Lucas is sweet, and he’s gentle, and so unlike any of the other men he’s been around. Lucas is the first person that kind of cracks his view on gender roles and what exactly defines a man.

-He butts heads with Mike a lot at first just because of how insistent Mike is about him being a girl, how he’s different and unwelcome because of it, but (if this is also transmasc Mike) they realize they’re actually really similar and grow closer because of it, or (if this isn’t transmasc Mike) Max realizes that it isn’t the “girl” thing that bothers him, it’s the fear of replacing El.

-If it’s both transmasc Max and transmasc Mike, Mike comes out WAY earlier than he would’ve on his own.

-The boys are all really supportive when he comes out (which would probably be around the season 3 era). They don’t really get it at first, but he’s their friend, and they’ve always been very vocal about how they’d kill for a friend if needed. And really, seeing Max as a boy isn’t all that different from what they were doing already, so it’s an easy adjustment.

-In a similar fashion to Max teaching El about being a girl in the show, the guys take him out on a “boys only” night. It isn’t really any different than their usual hangouts- they go to the movies, play video games, eat way too much junk food, but the boys only title makes Max feel all fuzzy and warm inside.

-He comes out to Billy while he’s dying. He didn’t ever really plan on doing it at all, but his step-brother is dying in his arms and he needs to get it off his chest before it’s too late. Billy is a lot of the reason it took so long for him to feel comfortable as himself, and he thinks Billy knows that once it’s out in the air. Unfortunately, Billy’s dead before he can really give much of a reaction, just a weak little “I’m sorry.” And that’s nowhere near enough to make up for everything.

-He comes out to his family that night in a screaming match with his step-dad. Neil is an asshole about it, but it doesn’t really matter because the whole argument starts because he’s gonna leave them. Susan is incredibly supportive, and she turns around and kicks Neil out even though she’d been begging him to stay moments before. Gives Max one of those big, therapeutic hugs where Max just sobs into her shirt.

-Max cuts his hair off after Billy’s death. He’s never had a problem with his hair, he actually likes it long, but he’s messed up over everything that happened. He leans a lot more into the stereotypes he hated as a kid, acts rougher and more stand-offish. He breaks up with Lucas, stops hanging out with the rest of his friends. He feels awful, because this is the first time in his life that he’s only surrounded by people that support and love him, but he feels like he doesn’t deserve it.

-(Vecna has a field day with all that)

-Post canon, he does grow his hair back out again. Lucas dramatically informs him that men with long hair are hot (bi king), to which Max shoots back that that would mean Mike was hot. Lucas gives Mike a quick once over and is like I mean, yeah.

-Lucas likes to greet people and go hi, yes, this is my boyfriend Max. He’s so cool. He pretty much single-handedly saved Hawkins that one time. And Max stands there with his face bright red in his hands like oh my god shut up

-Lumax and Byler double dates with an obnoxious amount of homo, striking fear into the hearts of conservative smalltown Indiana

YES I love this sorry for making it angst near the end but yes yes transmasc Max I love him💞

[magniloquent-raven]

i've seen a lot of AUs messing around with what happened between Billy and Steve at the end of s2, like, what if Billy had seen the demodog, what if they made out instead of beat the shit out of each other, what if Steve hadn't lied about Max, etc. etc.

and i mean, it's not like i've read every harringrove fanfic so maybe this has actually been written before, but it just occurred to me that i've never seen someone explore what might have happened if Billy had just showed up at the Byers' like twenty minutes earlier. before everyone else left.

i just think it would be interesting because Billy has a habit of keeping his attitude mostly in check around adults, and the fact that one of those adults is a cop might keep him even more in check, so the chances of him getting violent would be much lower. but despite him being less likely to lose his shit, there's also NO chance he'd actually listen if he was told to leave without Max. and i doubt Max would be cool with leaving, no matter how angry she knows Billy is getting (maybe in part BECAUSE she knows he's already pissed, the last thing she wants is to get into a car with him right now).

the whole thing would be SO sus, because everyone would be trying to stop him from going inside but he can see Max and her friends peeking through a broken window while the goddamn chief of police tries to run interference without actually telling him anything. he'd be so stubborn about the whole thing. pretending to be polite, but not blinking an eye when Hop starts implying he's going to arrest Billy for trespassing if he doesn't back down, and Joyce has to get involved, being a mom about it, trying to convince Billy that Max is safe and he doesn't have to worry and she can call Susan if that would help.

so when nothing they say to Billy actually makes a difference they start to wonder if they should just send Max home with him, and Mike has started to get snippy with her about it, saying she should just go because if her brother ruins everything it'll be her fault, but Lucas is adamant that letting Max leave with him would be a bad idea.

and somewhere in between all the arguing Billy shoves his way into the house, where there's still a demodog dead on the floor, and Will's art project on the walls, and Will himself, knocked out in the next room. which is all very weird, but Billy's kind of on a mission here. so him and Max get into it. he can't go after Lucas this time, not with a cop twenty feet away. they just argue. loudly. angrily.

until Billy has had enough, he can't keep pretending he isn't on pins and needles, hasn't been keyed up since his confrontation with Neil. and he has to hit something. anything. nearby. he punches a dent in the nearest wall.

and it freaks El out. and something explodes.

which is just one too many weird things for Billy to ignore.

Steve steps in at the same time Hopper does, both of them unsure how Billy is going to react. except he kind of. doesn't. he's freaked out, and confused, and still angry, but he also looks just as unsure as they are.

they don't really explain it to him. not all of it. he glares at everyone in the room while they give him the stilted cliffnotes version and he doesn't seem to believe any of it.

when Joyce and Hopper leave with their respective teams, Billy gets left behind with Steve and the kids. Steve's half sure he's going to grab Max and drive off the second they can't see tail-lights anymore, and given the way Max is bracing herself, she seems to think so too.

he doesn't. he lights up a cigarette and sits on the couch by himself, ignoring everyone's uneasy stares while they sweep up glass and wood splinters.

and i mean from there it would be both harder and easier to get the kids to the tunnels lmao. could go either way but i figure Billy volunteering to drive the children to their death just because Steve was so adamant it was a bad idea would not be entirely out of character for him. and he's still not convinced any of this is real, so maybe he wants to see it for himself. and maybe he's still itching for some action. if there is some crazy shit down there...well, if he's dead he won't have to explain to Neil how bad he fucked up, so there's that.

(and on a related note i kind of love the idea that Billy would be shit at fighting monsters. like they just freak him out and he can't do it. so he goes down there into the tunnels all sure of himself and confident because he knows he can fight but the second they run into trouble he freezes up and Steve has to save his ass. which totally doesn't turn him on at all, shut up)

[femmethpipe]

Red Water | Harringrove

Prologue: I Gotta Know What’s Inside You

Summary: Billy’s avoided Steve Harrington like the plague since that autumn night of ‘84. He’s given the fucking weirdo and the even weirder fucking kids their space just as Max demanded, and it’s worked for nearly a year.

He’s only got until his graduation until he can fly straight out of Hawkins without so much as looking back, but after leaving his beloved Camaro wrapped around a tree and his father’s hand on his shoulder heavier than ever, Steve Harrington, an alpha he knew he could never have, won’t fix that.

But things are never that simple.

TW: everything

Steve’s been driving with a grip so tight, his knuckles were bone white.

Billy steals a glance over at him at every possible moment. At the taut string that’s pulled the alpha’s shoulders into a defensive line, at the blank ominous stare he’s been giving the road for the past ten minutes as they drive further and further out of town.

It was one of those days where Neil wanted him out of the house. A dreary Sunday afternoon had somehow kept both Susan and Max from venturing out altogether which meant that Billy’s presence had to go, preferably without even stepping into Neil’s line of vision which left him to fend for himself while the temperatures dropped. Something about the cold and unforgiving dying that happens in Midwestern winters has never sat right with Billy, but he’s always been fascinated by it; the way everything dies in an explosion of color then rots on the ground. Overhead, the clouds are an ominous gray and the thunder rolls like a strike every so often.

Steve takes a backroad, one that’s twisting a bit too much for the fragile and flighty feeling in Billy’s head and bones. An Oingo Boingo tape blares way too loud and every nerve inside of the omega’s body is jumping, but he keeps it that way. He should turn the music down and ask Steve where he’s taking them, but he bites his tongue.

They were supposed to meet for their usual routine of the alpha feeding Billy and pretending not to notice any bruises the omega probably acquired over the week, after they’d park and smoke and talk. It was the one lifeline the blond had, his reprieve through a piss poor week and his one chance to relax—or relax as much as Billy could two feet away from Steve Harrington.

The dangerous truth was the omega felt like he could finally let go around him. His warm scent and big soft eyes that held no hint of judgement or betrayal. But today is different and Steve has barely said a word to him. Billy climbed into the car to the familiar and potent scent of aggression, but none obviously directed at him. Just looked him all over for way too many seconds too long, long enough to make Billy hesitate shutting the door. That seemed to bring Steve out of whatever trance he’d been in to ask the omega in a hoarse voice if he was okay. Which he was answered with a smart quip about if Billy looked alright.

Truthfully, the omega knew he looked like hell reheated and it kept his knees drawn so far to the right, his temple throbs from knocking against the window. His back burns with embarrassment that he’s wearing worn jeans with scant holes from his thighs rubbing together and the sweater Steve obviously gave him two weeks ago while the logos on the other boy’s clothes that he rightfully owned were about two tax brackets higher than Billy would ever see in his lifetime. His curls are messily pushed behind his ears and in desperate need of a brush though he should know by now Steve doesn’t give a fuck about that shit, that it wasn’t about that. But the deep need to attempt to look presentable, maybe even attractive didn’t forfeit the omega’s mind.

Fucking pathetic.

Billy knew it was. Finnicking over his looks just like he did that night he took out all his issues and problems on Steve, only now he’s shivering in the alpha’s passenger seat like a cat he found on the side of the road, and trying not to feel the butterflies in his stomach when he catches the brunet looking over at him.

The car is suddenly very still and the omega rips his eyes from the veins on Steve’s hand. They were outside of town, Billy knew that much from how long they’d been driving, but another factor about the shitty Midwest was that it all looked the fucking same. Flattened garbage litters the concrete ground and etiolated weeds jut from the cracks. A few faded yellow parking lines stood out just barely below the wet leaves and the trash that Billy could identify as pieces of red solo cups, Fireball shot bottles, and numerous beer cans. Nothing but towering, dying trees ahead of the dim lights of Steve’s Beamer with the clouds above darkening by the second.

The engine’s steady rumble dies as the alpha twists back the ignition. It kills the radio and plunges them into an uncomfortable silence that fills Billy with a cold dread that could no longer be kept at bay by the blasting heat.

The omega watches the bob of Steve’s adams apple where he swallows thickly. “We need to talk about what the fuck happened, Billy. I can’t keep doing this, I can’t keep—“

Billy’s heart drops to his ass.

The alpha lets out a frustrated growl, one that takes him aback at first, but Billy will be damned before he allows an alpha to know he was intimidated.

“Keep fucking what, Harrington? What the fuck do we need to discuss that requires you to drag me out to the goddamn sticks?” The blond’s teeth bare and he wants Steve to snap his own back; juvenile, volatile, wishing for punishment because anything was better than beat around the bush, prayer circle sympathy.

Steve’s wide eyes stare at him from across the car like Billy was a sheet of glass. Right fucking through him since day fucking one.

Emotions stir under Billy’s skin and much to his dismay, there wasn’t much anger left for him to muster and use to fight his way out of this. It would have been easier that way. Scream in Steve’s face that he’ll kill him if he ever tells anyone Billy Hargrove gets fucked by his own dad after getting the shit stomped out of him. Then maybe slam his car door hard enough to shatter the window as if it would make him feel better.

But he knew it wouldn’t. Billy’s learned that plenty.

The man across from him takes in a deep breath like he’s steadying himself and Billy supposes he is. He wonders what that’s like, thinking before action, being smart enough to not fly off the fucking hinges at the change of an emotion and controlling himself.

I can’t keep doing this. The raw blister of betrayal pangs in his throat. His chest feels concave, unsurprised yet he’s never been accepting of being left behind before. This time wouldn’t be any different despite every emotion in his body swaying Billy like a storm every time he saw the Beamer parked somewhere waiting for him.

The omega had been telling himself to await the day that Steve’s eyes would linger too long somewhere they shouldn’t, that maybe he’d even be sympathetic enough to kiss him on the mouth once or twice, but inevitably he would only be welcome to the backseat in due time. One day, he’d told himself countless times over the past few months, but not today. It was the one thing Billy thought he had a penchant for, knowing when his time was up and his welcome was nearly overstayed. Car rides spent with only music and cigarette smoke between them on long roads and shared milkshakes and hot meals and warm blankets—He’d been almost fooled.

But he would have let him, something like Neil laughed at him every night he’d have the audacity to dream of something more between them. Billy would have let Steve do whatever he pleased if it meant closeness and the absence of the looming dread of loneliness. And let the humiliation afterwards burn as painful as the hurt from the alpha’s perfidy.

Billy’s grin splits in a sardonic smile that mirrors every ounce of his winded and broken pride that could no longer mask his hurt. He huffs in fake amusement and his words fall like feathers in a dead wind rather than cutting like the knives they used to be, “I never fucking asked you for anything, not a goddamn thing.”

A heavy sigh plummets from the brunet and behind his eyes, the omega can tell he’s thinking over everything with the same stubborn resolve he’s always had. It makes Billy dig his nails into his palms.

Placid eyes stare dead ahead into the dying foliage and settling clouds. He shakes his head in denial, “That is not what this is about,” Steve’s eyes dart to his seat then back at Billy with a puppy dog exhaustion that made the omega only more irritated, “Why is it always that with you? Why can’t I just be fucking nice to you without you thinking I’ve got one out for you, or some shit?”

Because that’s how these things work, Billy knew simply.

There wasn’t a way on earth Steve was that clueless as to what they looked like around each other. What people had been saying. What the entire world thought of omegas like Billy Hargrove and what they hung around for.

The omega draws a sharp breath, one that hurts his ribs and burns on the way out, “Jesus fucking Christ,” Billy bites out in a breathy, frustrated mumble before he finds that last string of red, that one remaining vein of gasoline to blow as he lights the match, but even then— “If your charity case work and taking care of unfortunate poor kids isn’t getting your rocks off anymore, maybe you should just take me the fuck home.”

“You don’t get it, Billy, I can’t go back to just fucking watching, I won’t.”

“Watching what?” The blond challenges, fucking spit it out.

“Why won’t you just let me take care of you?”

“What’re you trying to say, Steve?” He whispers the man’s name into the cold air between them.

A year ago, he would have been whatever cheap insult came from Billy’s rolodex first, months ago he would have just been Harrington. And it makes him want to blow his brains out that even just saying some alpha’s name meant so much to him; even worse when he knows that Steve knows that.

God, he always fucking knows.

Pretty boy sticks his nose in business that doesn’t have anything to do with him. Always ready to be someone’s knight in shining armor and even worse, Billy wants exactly that. Without deserving it. Aware there’s some shit even Steve’s heart of gold can’t fix.

He looks ready to say something, but the omega stops him dead in his tracks.

“I won’t suck you off or let you fuck me,” Billy spews like a busted beer can and God, if that’s not a lie. “If that’s— I know you don’t just give a shit. And I know that you know I don’t have anything else to give you. We’re not here for no fucking reason, so you can just say it and we can be on our merry fucking way.”

Because that’s the thing. Wild parties, tight jeans and tight shirts, fast car—Billy’s fucking poor. He’s loose, if anyone off the basketball team and cheer squad have anything to say about it. Steve should be running for the hills before he ends up making a decision he can’t take back.

“It’s not you saying this shit, Billy. I know it’s not.” The alpha’s face is painted in an emotion he doesn’t recognize, but then he’s turning in his seat to get even closer.

“Look at me.” Steve commands and Billy should tell him to fuck off, that he doesn’t take orders from a fucking baby alpha, but he tries.

Looks right at his soft brown hair that reminds Billy of the big redwoods in California when the light hits it just right. Broad shoulders covered in denim and wide, warm palms that didn’t feel like shackles when he’d grab Billy’s wrists. Steve’s scent was so potent in his car; burning wood and spice and smoke that fogged up his brain until he was so confused he thought he was safe.

Steve grabs his hand, so gentle yet his hold firm, and the sudden intensity of the alpha’s eyes meeting his own is too much. His hand is warm, but then again everything about him is.

“If I made you feel that way, that’s sure as hell not why I care about you. I mean, fuck Billy—I don’t just give people my clothes, alright?” Steve’s voice is filled with a desperate exasperation. “I don’t just stay up until the middle of the night driving people around while they try to fall asleep in my backseat, okay?”

A heavy sigh empties from the other man’s chest while lungfuls of the alpha’s scent burn Billy’s like whiskey. He looks just as tired as the omega feels for a second, but then he’s holding him tighter. “I thought my intentions were obvious for a while now.”

Steve lets the words hang in the air and he doesn’t let Billy go. It’s not like he wanted him to.

But he still has to try to pull away and aim his eyes out at the dying wild around them, only the alpha won’t let him go. It makes his heart sing. “Who told you that shit, Billy? Him?”

More and more, the dam of tears building in his eyes readies to spill over. They burn and bite at everything Billy thought he knew about himself. He prepares for the world to end, to stop turning and burn up in fire and ash, but only the patter of rain begins its descent from the clouds against the windshield. His throat is filling with cotton balls, but he’s not going to be hit; nothing is hurting at all. He nods his head and suddenly, the gate busts and the flood comes. But Steve is there.

His touch, his scent and all. Driving Billy crazy because he’s being pulled out of his usual reality of just surviving. Steve is here, making sure he’s safe when no other person has ever done that for him. He’s angry, but not angry at him, for him. And Billy can’t fucking breathe.

“That day, when I knocked on your door—“ Steve wets his lips and the trepidation in his words is almost too much for the omega to take.

“He said that.”

The man across from him appears to chew his words. “Does he hurt you? Does he do that shit to you, Billy?”

There was so much he knew the alpha wanted to say when Steve had unfortunately shadowed the Hargrove residence. Trouble was, Billy was getting closer and closer to baring his heart and fucking soul to him. The shaky lies he’d feed Steve kept burning his tongue every time he’d have to force them out. The anger which bled into exhaustion finally catching up to him like an adrenaline rush wearing off.

Because Billy was tired of the lying. Of trying and failing to keep the voice that Neil drilled in his head from getting too loud; of black and blue skin and blood stained sheets; not really living when being around Steve chases those feelings away and shows him it doesn’t have to be that way. Because Steve is so good and safe. And Billy is a greedy fucking leech for wanting to hand all his life away for someone else to fix.

He shakily nods his head out of distrust of his voice. Something sits at the edge of Billy’s tongue so heavily, he wants to fucking bite it. Shit he’s never said before, never wanted to say out loud or even think of again that he feels he needs to tell Steve. How he’s been running from everything, he wants to stop but he doesn’t think he can stop and how he’ll only bring him down with him in the end.

“He’s been angry for so long.” Billy’s voice is wet. He prefers for all of his words to come out swinging and ready for a fight, but that’s disappeared from him now. He’s too tired. “Even before my mom left.”

“Steve—“ If Billy wasn’t in love before, he was now at the way the alpha hangs onto the omega calling his name.

“I’m so tired of feeling dirty all the time.” The omega admits and suddenly there’s weight just gone. The words of weakness taste acrid like a pill he couldn’t swallow, but it’s gone. “It’s like I can’t get him off of me no matter what.”

Billy takes a breath that feels too big for his chest, but then he takes another at the force of the gasp erupting from his throat when Steve’s safe, steady palms take hold of his face. His eyes are so big, sometimes the omega thinks he might just constantly be in awe. But Steve is looking at him like that even with Billy’s armor stripped and burned away. Fuck, he can’t stop crying.

But there’s something more behind the whirls of dark amber. A shudder pulls through every nerve in the omega’s body. It’s like a match striking how goosebumps erupt on his skin, but this time not from the cold. From the heat in Steve’s gaze that’s pouring into his scent. It’s anger and fury and rage that Billy is all too familiar with.

Not a word is uttered between them. His nostrils were flared and a slight tremble in his shoulders, but he’s holding the omega so gently. Like he’s worth something. But he’s so angry and the omega should be thinking about running. Billy’s heard Steve get pissed off before, both times directed at him before they exchanged blows; then just a scratchy drawl expected of a teenage alpha and the omega practically laughed in his face. Now, the placid look in his eye is the blinding lightning flash before the blood curdling thunder of his growl. Steve sounds like nothing other than a predator closing in on its prey. His scent fogs the car with something Billy can only think of as wrath. Ice runs through the omega’s veins and every bone in his body drops in submission.

Cinnamon. Diesel. Not at him. For him.

A primal noise falls from the omega in a soft whine and for a moment, Billy can see the battle of animal and man quells within Steve. It’s a sound he’s never made before, but it comes so naturally. Since when does Billy Hargrove fucking whine? Since Steve Harrington, apparently.

His touch is hesitant, but he feels so sure. He’s everywhere, blanketing over the omega in a weight that makes him boneless. Steve’s fingers ghost over his cheekbone before his thumb rests over his cupid’s bow. A fine delicateness to Steve’s touches leaves a trail of fluttering goosebumps on his arms and up his spine. Being admired like fine art, something meant to be protected and cherished, it sends a tremble down his body in a wave of emotion. Billy presses into the touch and allows it to spread like a flame.

Steve presses his lips against his thumbnail and Billy fucking shakes. It’s a promise, one that could only end in fucking disaster and pain and loneliness will take the omega again. But it’s getting harder for him to believe that when the alpha is looking at him this way, even when he doesn’t have his usual glamor that serves him well as his armor.

“I’m going to fucking kill him,” The alpha’s hushed tone is intimate, pleading almost as if he were asking for an apology, “I should’ve done it when I saw that fuckin’ bruise on your neck. I can’t let him get away with doing this shit to you.”

Billy can see the anger begin to simmer under his skin once more, so he makes that noise again. It’s soft and high pitched and so unlike everything he’s tried to craft about himself, yet still comes to him like he’s done it for Steve before.

The alpha huffs through his nose again in frustration, this time at himself.

“Maybe there is some fire in you after all.” Billy’s breathy voice is embarrassing, or it should be, but he doesn’t care. Barely crosses his flighty mind.

The fire in the alpha’s eyes dims for a moment and left is a puppy dog where the wolf once was. The omega cooes at how adorable it is.

Steve snaps his canines just an inch away from his face. It’s playful, it’s sending too much fucking dope to his brain that Billy doesn’t know if he can handle. He lets his head dip to the side and the incessant yet delicate press of the alpha’s fangs on his flesh has his head filling with sap. He’s so far fucking gone for this alpha and they haven’t so much as necked yet. A shudder erupts down his back and his cold toes curl in his converse.

“‘Hair is so pretty.” Steve murmurs. Like himself again as he sinks his fingers into the blond curls and holds Billy’s nape.

He’s floating.

-

tbc

[the-lark-ascending69]

I need more android robin whump!! Is robin ever gonna come across one of her previous owners who mistreated her (maybe billy) and have to face them again ??

What would Nancy do if she ended up getting hurt ?

I love this au a lot it's so interesting

!!! Hi anon! I have a few thoughts on this... mostly about the time she finds out Nancy's brother is friends with Billy's younger sister, Max.

Now, she and Max had a complicated relationship. Max never had much interaction with her other than to give her orders (which whe did very rarely, mostly just to tell her to leave her alone). Max didn't know Robin was sentient and she didn't see a point in talking to something that was basically a laptop on esteroids. She didn't care about being nice to her, but she could never really bring herself to be too cruel. It felt like punching a teddy bear - it can't feel anything, but why would you do that? It's just mean.

She always hated how Billy treated her. Neil supposedly got her after his psychiatrist recommended it to treat his violent impulses, plus he thought Billy might be gay, and he liked the idea of having a "hot girl robot" to "change his mind". He really didn't care much about Billy's mental health, and he didn't want to waste the money, but he was being pressured by Billy's school's authorities, by the social worker in their case and by his own wife, Max's mother, who was secretly relieved, because she thought Billy would stop taking his anger out on Max if he had a different target, one who couldn't feel anything. Now, Max knew Billy was a horrible human being, and hearing Robin's cries and begging when Billy beat her was unbearable. Soon, you could never see Max without her headphones. When she found Robin curled up inside a closet, her arm bent in a strange way, looking small and terrified and crying... well, Max wasn't stupid. Brutalizing an unfeeling android was one thing, but illegally implanting tear ducts in her because she didn't look hurt enough... Billy was just cruel, sick and sadistic and she hoped he died.

But she was really more concerned with Billy's evil than with how Robin got hurt. In fact, she was relieved, because Billy mostly left her alone now. She wasn't proud of that, but whenever she heard Robin's desperate cries of "please, don't!" and "wait! It hurts!", all she could think about was... that could be her instead. So she never intervened and never tried to stop it, lest Billy turned his attention back to her.

Robin never expected anything else from her. She didn't blame her. She knew what it looked like, and part of her was relieved, too. At least Max didn't get hurt.

In fact, protecting Max like this was the main reason it took her so long to run away, but when she overheard Billy talking to the technician at the illegal repair shop, and learned that he wanted to basically turn her into an adult toy, she couldn't take it anymore. She left that very same night with only the clothes on her back.

So when Christmas comes around and the whole gang gathers to celebrate at Steve's, she sees a familiar face, and they both freeze. For a moment Max thinks this girl just looks very similar to the old android - or maybe she'd happen to be the inspiration for her design? Was she a model? She certainly couldn't be that odd robot that called herself "Robin", because she had her arm linked with Nancy's and she was smiling and telling jokes and she looked so alive - but then again, the old robot looked alive, too.

But then Robin recognizes her, and she debates between greeting Max or running away. Nancy feels her freeze by her side - and before she can ask what's wrong, Robin makes a decision to say hi. She introduces herself to Max - oh god, it really was the android - and she asks if she remembers her. She asks how Max is doing, and she doesn't dare ask about Billy but she desperately wants to know if he's still around.

Max then looks at Nancy, about to ask why the hell did she bring an android as her date, but it's like Nancy read her mind, and her death glare was enough to shut her up. Everyone else is there, including Hopper and Joyce, who are old and wouldn't understand, and even then, the idea of a sentient android is so outlandish that so far, only Steve and tona lesser degree Dustin and Suzie buy it. Convincing everyone else she's not crazy won't be easy and she does not want to ruin Robin's first Christmas. So Max bites her tongue and goes along with it. It actually makes Robin so happy - she thinks Max finally recognizes her as sentient.

She talks to Nancy in private, later, while Robin is playing some kind of videogames with Mike and his friends on the console - she tells her that was her brother's old android. She callously tells her everything in detail - the alterations, the beatings, the screaming... Nancy does her best to keep a calm exterior, but her heart breaks with every word. Max just wants to know what was she thinking bringing her to a Christmas party. And it takes some convincing - pretty much all night, and Max does not want to believe it, because that just means she let a helpless girl endure terrible abuse alone when they could have protected each other. But Nancy is so confident and so insistent and so sure of Robin's self-awareness, that Max can't help but accept it. She cries in Nancy's arms, apologizing over and over again. She didn't know. She didn't want to leave her alone. She didn't want to feel relieved when Billy went after Robin and not her. Nancy just holds her, and tells her she was just a child. She can talk to Robin some time. She's sure she'll appreciate it.

Max and Robin eventually become good friends, actually. Almost sisters. Robin learns that Max hasn't heard of Billy in a long time, and that's very reassuring - he's far from them, now. And Max has Lucas and Robin has Nancy and they have each other now, and they're building a new life away from the horrors.

So when she hears a rough knock on the apartament's door at 3 AM, and hears his voice... she thinks she's hallucinating. It happens sometimes, when her circuits are not working well, but it's rare and she's never so awake when it happens. She runs to Nancy's room and shakes her away. Her whole body is trembling as she says "I think there's someone outside."

Might be getting ahead of myself with the Nancy lore, but she still has a gun from her teenage years, when she and Jonathan had to protect themselves. She hasn't forgotten how to use it.

She doesn't recognize the man when she goes out into the hallway, she only knows he smells like beer and piss, but she can guess who he is from the way he calls for a "robot wh*re", and if she's right, then she hates that she has to meet him in the hallway, where everyone would hear if she put a bullet between his eyes (she's killed people before. It wouldn't be hard).

She's not sure how much he understands - he's leering at her when she comes out - but then she presses the barrel of her gun up against his throat, and tells him to never, ever come near Robin or Max again, or it would be the last thing he does.

He calls her a bitch, but he leaves. Nancy has the feeling it won't be the last time they'll have to deal with him.

Robin is nowhere to be seen when Nancy goes back in - her heart is in her throat, pulse picking up - "Robin? Robin, are you okay?" she calls with a trembling voice. She looks for her everywhere - bedrooms, bathroom, under the bed... she finds her curled up inside a closet, knees against her chest, face hidden in her arms, tears trailing down her cheeks. Nancy realizes she's still holding her gun and places it on the nightstand so she can gather this girl into her arms. She brings her to her bed, tucks her in and holds her tight. She could swear her body doesn't stop trembling until sunrise. All Nancy can do is to hug her tight, stroke her hair, rock her back and forth. Tell her she won't let him touch her again. Promising she'll protect her. She's safe now. Nancy promises.

Indeed, that's not the last time they see Billy, but that's something for another dayyyy

Oh and Robin meets Brenner again at one point, but she doesn't remember him 🤭🤭🤫