#diet plan for piles

[wikilifestyles]

Piles or Hemorrhoids,Home Remedies for Piles Cure , Perfect Diet plan for Piles with 7 Factors to Consider

Hemorrhoids, also known as Piles disease, are one of the most common diseases in today’s society; no one in the world hasn’t heard of the disease known as Piles. Piles are the third most common outpatient gastrointestinal diagnosis in the United States,Read More

[wellnessexpert12]

These three are not the same but have a similarity in pathology, all of the three are anal pathologies rooted in the gut health/digestion of the patient. Let’s take them separately, beginning with the most common condition of Piles also known as Hemorrhoids - swollen veins in the anus and lower rectum.

[lvstrucks]

notes 💌

lando norris x reader

Request: Imagine reader feels like she hasnt spent time with Lando in a couple days so she starts leaving fluffy and funny notes around their apartment for him thank youuuu

It felt like it had been days since you’d last properly spoken to your boyfriend.

Despite you both being in the same city, your shared apartment may as well have been a flatshare with strict agreements to never be in the apartment at the same time. Due to conflicting schedules, it seemed that as soon as Lando arrived home, you were rushing out the door to work. When you pulled into the driveway, Lando would be pulling out, giving you a cheeky beep of the horn and blowing you a kiss as he went. 

By the fifth day that went on like this with no end in sight, you’d had enough. A small stack of colourful sticky notes on the kitchen counter caught your eye and you hunted around for a pen, putting your plan into action. 

Lando arrived home with a sigh. The apartment was dark and quiet for 8pm, but with the hours you were currently working this wasn’t out of the ordinary. He kicked off his sneakers and padded into the kitchen, frowning as his stomach growled. He’d finished all his carefully prepped, diet-abiding meals for the day, but maybe a snack couldn’t hurt? As he flicked on the overhead light a small post it note in his favourite bright yellow colour stuck to the fridge caught his eye. It sat between a few fridge magnets and a strip of photobooth pictures of the two of you, you sitting on Lando’s lap and pulling a silly face as he grinned widely. He smiled softly at the memory, and then even wider as he read the note. 

Hope you had a good day! I got some of those puffed crisps you like, have a few. You’ve earned it :) 

He pulled open the pantry and sure enough, there they were. He tore open the packet, scoffing a few down before heading down the hallway to your bedroom. He changed into sweatpants quietly and curled up beside your sleeping frame before hearing a crinkling, crumpling sound as he lay his head down. Feeling around blindly, his hands came into contact with another small note and he flicked on the bedside lamp to read it. 

Rest up, I love you ♡

He pouted, turning off the light and snuggling into you, head tucked into the back of your neck. 

The next few days continued as before, but Lando found your notes around the house like small glimmers of love. 

Don’t work too hard! was laying on top of his workout gear one morning.

Drive safely please! stuck to the steering wheel of his car.

BEST BF EVRRRR was sitting on top of his shoes when he went to put them on. (He quietly tucked this one into the back of his phone case for later.)

When he looked into the mirror after stepping out the shower, he was met with: There’s that pretty smile!

Wanna spoon?  Stuck on the cutlery drawer. 

Let’s do cardio together tonight… was on the door to his home gym. 

You left the notes and noticed they’d disappeared by the day after, assuming Lando read them, smiled and threw them out. What you didn’t realise was that Lando was collecting them, making a neat pile in the glove compartment of his car. Over the next few days, whenever he felt lonely or needed assurance, he had a whole pile of your feelings to sift through and bask in. 

When you woke up a few days later, you sighed at the cold, empty bed. Opening your eyes you were met with a fluro yellow square covering your eyes. You giggled, pulling the note left on your forehead. 

Morning pretty girl, it said. I took the afternoon off and will pick you up from work. We have a LOT of catching up to do ;) 

tysm for requesting x

[dieticianankita]

Which foodstuffs cause piles?

Veins within and outside of your anus and rectum that are inflamed and enlarged is called Piles  . They may be uncomfortable, painful, and can lead to rectal bleeding. Another name for  piles  is haemorrhoids . Hemorrhoids are a part of everyone's natural state, however they are generally not an issue. They only exhibit bothersome symptoms when they swell and grow larger.

1.It's advisable to restrict those  foods which contain little fiber  you eat because eating too much of them might lead to or exacerbate constipation (and, consequently, hemorrhoids' ).

2.White bagels and bread

3.dairy products such as milk and cheese

4.Meat Processed foods, such as fast food and frozen meals

Before using iron supplements, consult your doctor because they may contribute to constipation and other digestive issues. Piles are a result of straining, which puts pressure on the veins in your rectum or anus. They may come to mind as varicose veins on your bottom. Anal and rectal veins might swell and inflame as a result of any strain that puts more pressure on your tummy or lower extremities.

5.Especially during pregnancy, weight increase can cause pelvic discomfort

6.putting up a lot of effort to poop due to constipation

7.lifting large objects with effort or weightlifting

How can we prevent from piles ?

As your age older ,piles are more frequent. These actions can aid in avoiding the constipation and firm stools that can cause piles

*.Avoid using the restroom for too long or too firmly. Pressure on your rectum and anus results from prolonged toilet use. Your rectum is lower than the rest of your bottom because the seat is carved out. Blood begins to collect and clot in certain veins as a result of gravity taking over. Hemorrhoids may result from straining or pushing when those factors are present.

*When the desire strikes, use the restroom right away; don't wait. Try to sit down for a while if you feel the need to use the restroom between bathroom visits. Breathe deeply and direct your attention away from your bladder. Set a target of waiting for at least five minutes. You can eventually increase this to 10 or even 20 minutes.

*Drink a lot of water all day long .The kidneys are unable to excrete extra water from the body when there is too much of it present. It begins to build up inside the body and causes nausea, vomiting, and diarrhoea . headaches that keep you up all day. Both dehydration and hydration can cause headaches. *Increase your intake of whole grains, fresh fruits and vegetables, and other high-fiber foods. In general, women and those born with the gender allotted to them should strive to consume 25 grams of fiber daily, whereas males and those born with the gender allocated to them ought to consume 35 grams. *Physically active. Bowels continue to move when you're moving. It's likely that you've changed something about your lifestyle if you're going to the bathroom more frequently. For instance, you might be eating more whole grains, which boosts your consumption of fibre . Increased bowel movements may sometimes be a sign of a minor condition that will go away on its own. *Only use laxatives or enemas as directed by your healthcare professional. Laxatives and enemas in excess can make it worse. The most typical signs of a laxative overdose include nausea, vomiting, cramping in the abdomen, and diarrhoea. Children are more likely than adults to have dehydration and an imbalance in their electrolytes (body chemicals and minerals).

[johnbrand]

True Test

My nephew Brandon grew up in a deeply conservative household, where masturbation was strictly forbidden. He had been raised just like his father and I had been by our own parents, and their parents before them. We were built by traditions, maintaining them as they had maintained us throughout our childhood and adolescence. Certain words were never said in the house, certain ideologies never acknowledged. 

It had been my brother’s hope for Brandon to never see a naked woman before marriage. Everything had appeared to have been going to plan, for by the time Brandon reached his 22nd birthday, he was still exceptionally shy around the whole topic. My brother and I had been so proud; his little boy had made it through all of college without being tainted by “progressive” ideas or gone astray from our values. Unfortunately, that image was shattered when I arrived at  Brandon’s room to fetch him for cake, finding him jerking out a quickie to hardcore gay porn on his laptop.

Both of us stood in shock for a moment, unable to move as the realizations hit us. I had discovered his secret, he believed his perfect facade was about to collapse. Brandon opened his mouth to explain but I had already left the doorway. By the time we got downstairs, everybody had been waiting for us. They had no idea what I was about to tell them.

“Before Brandon blows out the candles, I have one last birthday gift to give him.” Brandon rushed in behind me, his face red with embarrassment. My brother eyed me, caught off guard by this sudden announcement. “After college, he will stay with me out in the country for a few months to learn some more physical skills. All expenses covered by me, just one last hurrah before Brandon’s adulthood begins!”

Brandon’s eyes grew wide as the room cheered. My brother gave me a solid pat on the back, laughing and thanking me for such a great opportunity, insisting it was too much. I argued the contrary, watching as my nephew hesitantly paced over to his cake.

———

What none of my family knew, not even my brother, was that my property out in the country also doubled as a conversion camp. My institution had stayed afloat for three primary reasons. First, my property was an exclusive institution. I worked one-on-one with my clients, meaning my property was truly intimate. This tied in my second aspect, privacy. It was not special that no one in my family knew of my alternate career, as I kept my side gig well under the wraps of a decent, average country farm. Finally, I had never had a complaint. All my clients converted perfectly to my standards.

When Brandon had arrived at my farm for the summer, he had assumed there would be a combination of heavy farm work and awkward conversations. To be fair, at the surface level this was true. I had my nephew working from dawn to dusk every day, filling him with hearty, animal protein-heavy meals that along with the exhaustion would knock him out immediately after dinner was served. 

There was no time for anything but labor and my conversations with Brandon. I also allowed no devices beside my work computer, which was off limits anyway, meaning not only did my nephew have no time to jerk off, but nothing to jerk off to. Eventually, Brandon’s brain became too overworked from the constant tug of war between exertion and exhaustion, forcing his will to fall back in line. It became easier to just listen and absorb, to sponge up my opinions rather than react to them.

Over the summer months, I watched as my nephew’s slim, faggy form bloated into that of a man. He grew taller, broader, muscles slowly piling on thanks to the proper diet and obnoxious amount of exercise and training. One by one I replaced his articles of clothing with more appropriate attire: cheap tees that could get dirty, thrifted jeans, my old boxers already stretched to fit his thickening size. Brandon had not made any comment when his razors had disappeared, nor when his shoes were replaced with much larger, well-worn boots. His growing feet had needed them anyway.

The mental changes were harder. Our conversations, which eventually became nothing more than lectures, where discussions focused around the family's values. I spent the majority of our time peeling back Brandon’s progressive ideology, stripping down to the traditional conservative roots. In between it all, I would constantly scatter in mentions of girls, vulgarly tossing tits and pussy language so that it became all my nephew heard. At first it pissed him off, but once Brandon began to simply ingest it all, I knew the conversion had already begun. 

By our last week together, Brandon had become an entirely different man. The 22-year-old now physically resembled our family pride, his masculinity now at par with the textbook definition. As a final test of my work, I brought my nephew into my office and sat him next to the sole computer on the property. I instructed Brandon to open the screen, stepping away as the old monitor booted up a lesbian porno I had already booted up.

“Like what you see?” 

I chuckled as Brandon’s cock hardened, completely mesmerized. Thanks to the lack of exposure, my nephew’s brain was flooded with waves of sexual pleasure forgotten to him, now redirected with my instruction. With his instincts realigned, Brandon’s former life would be no more. I reached over and quickly turned off the monitor, knowing his aching cock threatened immediate release.

“You’ve passed the test,” I announced. “You’re a real man now, Brandon.”

I motioned towards the open bathroom, Brandon's massive cock still throbbing for the opposite gender. I offered my permission without saying a word, grabbing for the door. To my surprise, and delight, my nephew cockily questioned my expertise.

“I disagree, uncle,” his voice was deep and authoritative. “The true test will come after I lose my gold star.”

[cepheustarot]

Random facts about your future spouse

Attention! This reading is for entertainment purposes only. This tarot reading does not give a 100% guarantee that all the described situations will occur or being ultimate truth. You build your own life and destiny and only you know yourself best.

✧ Masterlist ✧ Paid readings

Pick a pile. Choose one or more pictures. Trust your intuition.

Pile 1: Your future spouse is younger than you, but by nature very responsible and mature, quite reasonable and soberly looks at life, objective and honest, not one of those who hides the truth, can sometimes be too straightforward. They may look harsh, cold and unapproachable, but next to you they are very gentle, romantic and caring. This person is very fond of arranging romantic surprises, and in general tends to devote a lot of time and attention to lover. They can often arrange dates or give you gifts, talk a lot of tenderness. They also take great care of their figure, they probably have an athletic physique and they can often exercise and monitor their diet to maintain their figure. Their profession or occupation is closely related to a managerial position, they can work in the field of law, research, in the field of exact sciences, in particular physics and mathematics, in the field of medicine. They are quite educated and constantly improve their skills, in their free time they prefer reading books or listening to lectures or videos on a narrow specialized topic. They may be from a conservative and religious family. They also don't really like stability, they like to change something in their lives, for example, they can often rearrange rooms, they can experiment with style, or they can often get out of the house and do something they like, because they don't like to stay at home for a long time.

Pile 2: Your future spouse is quite an intelligent, erudite person, when talking to them, you may get the impression that your spouse knows everything and can answer any of your questions — and they really understand many topics. Perhaps their line of work is closely related to writing texts, they may be interested in journalism, writing, philosophy, and like to watch documentaries. By their nature, they are very calm, they can be slow, they have a relaxed speech, posture, facial expression and in general they are very relaxed in life, they are probably one of those who do not worry about trifles and live one day. They are quite responsive, kind, talkative and like to chat a lot, but they also like to listen to others. Perhaps in the past they were fond of horse riding or they dream of trying to do it! They are also fond of gardening, perhaps their family has its own farm or a house outside the city with its own vegetable garden. They are not afraid of competition, on the contrary, competition only motivates them, adds excitement. This applies to everything, even games are taken seriously and can perceive games not as entertainment, but as competition, to win at any cost.

Pile 3: Your future spouse is a calm and reasonable person, they cannot be called conflicted, but if make them angry, they always know what to say so that they close their mouth to the interlocutor and that their opponent feels ashamed and regrets that he even started arguing. They have a stable job and a stable income, it's hard to say that they are striving for promotion, they are satisfied with what they have now, they are completely satisfied with their career. They can do charity work, volunteer from time to time, or work in animal shelters. Although they are calm for the most part, they tend to worry about their future from time to time, they can also have a lot of fears and they can panic too much when something does not go according to plan or when they face the slightest setback. By themselves, they are quite detached, they like to be alone, they are thoughtful and carefully choose their words before saying something and think a lot before doing anything. In terms of relationships, they are hardly romantic, but they are very loyal and will be with their loved one until the end, they respect their partner and support him in any decisions. The union with such a person is very strong and long.

Thank you for reading! I will be glad of any feedback 💕

[azure-cherie]

PAC : Your natural gifts from your mother's family line

Hii guys how have you been , it's been long I hope you all have been taking care of yourself and eating well . Let's get into your reading choose with your intuition and take what resonates and leave the rest 💫

Masterlist

Pile 1 :

You've got great hand at crafts and art , I hear mostly mosaic type of crafts you might have Arab roots somewhere in your ancestry .

You have natural inclination towards animals, I get heardsmanship . Animals are naturally attracted to your kindness . Some of you might be vegetarians.

Keeping records of things. You love to plan , journal set routines , keeping scrapbooks etc , very specific but I remember there's a place in banaras where they keep records of one's family , someone from your mother's line might have worked their or you need to visit that place for some knowledge in your family line , I believe Teerth purohit keep the records look more into it .

Swordsmanship skills are also a gift from your ancestors , not only in a normal way but in a metaphysical way , certain symbols were painted in your early weapons they were used as protection symbols , if you're struggling with protection yourself you can use those .

Pile 2 :

I get that you guys have such mesmerizing eyes , you descend from a clan of very gorgeous people, not just about the looks but the etiquette the enigma the sense of fashion and taste has been hereditary sure you have developed so much on your own but your blood sure has the essence.

Leadership skills , for most of you this is an untapped gift because you don't believe in yourself they're standing beside you do not be scared you're powerful you're worthy , you need to heal your throat sure everything else will follow.

You have a way with the winds and water , talents like swimming , sailing, surfing , fishing are natural to your, you might have a family line of pirates , people who worshipped and worked with water or water deities.

Some of you here might be adopted , if you're struggling to look into your original family your roots could be based in Celtic or Aztec lines . Offerings to a deity you connect well with help , very specifically look into your celtic zodiac tree for example it's oak leave offerings under the oak tree . Some women might help you , she mostly wears pink or orange .

Pile 3 :

You derive your activeness vitality energy from your mother's family line , if you feel lazy it's an inherent indication of some problems in your gut switch to a diet which is more fruit based , hazelnuts , macadamia etc . Find out about your traditional diet as it will activate you .

You're very fast at learning languages , mathematics etc you also have the gift of understanding and forming strategies.

Gardening , are you guys fairies cause you sure give their vibe , you're good at gardening and working with herbs , fairy magic , kitchen magic etc , start growing your own herbs you'll be good at it .

Some of you here might have Japanese roots and might descend from a line that practiced gyotaku ( Japanese art of fish printing ) you have a talent for that and also in crafts and art surrounding it . Dairy industry can also be one of your assests I also sense some Egyptian ancestry about people who had lot of camels. You're blessed by Goddess Hathor.

Thank you so much for reading have a great day/night 💕

[icyg4l]

PAC: June 2024 Predictions

Hello beautiful people! Continuing on with my summer 2024, I am kicking off this upcoming June with predictions! I look forward to posting more content relating to this topic and many others. I also want to say that tomorrow, I will be having a Five Dollar Friday Sale so if you would like to receive a reading for a lower price, tomorrow is the day to do so! Without further ado, please choose the image that resonates with you!

Top Left-to-Bottom Right: (1-4)

Pile One: This pile is definitely geared towards femmes of the African diaspora. I feel like you will be more knowledgeable about your culture. You will take more pride in your identity this month. Happy Juneteenth in advance <3! I also feel like this month will be perfect for you to brush up on skills like crocheting, quilt making, jewelry making or sewing. I see that you’re a versatile person who has many sides so do not be afraid to show them. I feel like this month you will be rewarded with recognition due to your connections with women. If you are someone who struggles when it comes to intimacy with women, do not fear what can work for you. This month is crucial for you. I feel like you need to be paying close attention to cameras. People will be videoing you and taking pictures of you heavy this month. You might even go viral. People will also be more generous towards you this month. You may even notice people being more flirtatious with you, offering to pay for your drinks/food, etc. Some of you are going to be traveling down South, specifically Mississippi, Alabama and Georgia. If you have a sexual partner, you will get into an argument with them about something trivial. It will be blown out of proportion but I will say this. There is a reason why you feel the way you feel about them right now. Your gut never lies, love. And lastly, you may get invited to a surplus of dinner dates, picnic dates and family friendly places like Top Golf, Dave N Busters, etc. And be sure to keep your spiritual protection up!

Cards Used: Wheel of Fortune, 7 of Cups, 6 of Cups, 8 of Wands (RX), 5 of Wands, The Star, The Empress, Judgment, King of Wands.

extras: buying hair picks. reaching a fruit tree. jamaican flag. acorns. nature lover. egyptian goddess. play for keeps. buckaroos. monkey island.

Pile Two: Who lit a fire under your ass, Pile Two? I feel like this month will be about spoiling yourself and letting people know that you are not to be played with. It feels like you are finally standing up for yourself after being punked for so long. Think of this time as charging up and gaining your power. This is the era of reclaiming your power. You are going to be realizing your worth and it will feel so good. A lot of you guys are newly single and now you feel spiritually lighter. The weight of your past relationship turned you into someone you weren’t. Healing is not a linear journey so you need to be as patient with yourself as possible. Some of you will be taking up a pottery class, will start pole dancing or start gardening to help you cope with your situation. You are more in control of your situation than you think. It’s time to want better for yourself and to do better for yourself. Out with the old, in with the new is what I heard. If you’ve been talking about starting up a business or starting up a podcast, then get on it! Type up that business plan and brainstorm some topics to talk about (preferably some unrelenting to splitting the bill or the criteria of being a feminine). This month, you could also do some traveling. It could be in the Northern parts of the U.S. or even in the Caribbean. I feel like your main focus will definitely be getting rid of the dead weight though. Clearing up your face, cleaning up your diet, physically cleaning your room, all of that. Just do it!

Cards Used: 5 of Discs, King of Swords, Queen of Swords, Knight of Discs, 6 of Swords, Temperance, 9 of Discs, The Fool

extras: revenge body. health nut. being more strict. podcast listener. kendrick lamar fan. maracas. greece. puerto rico. haitian. fixing insecurities.

Pile Three: You guys are definitely under 5’4”, lol. I feel like you could be an aspiring model or dancer. You could even be an aspiring rapper. I feel like you guys have a resting bitch face and because of it a lot of people accuse you of being mean when you really aren’t. This month, you could find yourself trying to overcompensate for that, lol! You may find yourself doing yard work for your neighbors, putting up flyers for someone’s local business, taking out someone’s trash, moving someone’s car for them, picking up your s/o’s sibling/mother up from work/school. I also see you guys purchasing a new wig with color in it or a pair of Lady Gaga-esque heels from Poshmark or Depop. You guys have a gothic sense of style. During the month of June, you will definitely be partying with the gays (probably only on the weekends though depending on your schedule). Happy Pride Month <3! I think that you guys will be doing things that will get you out of your comfort zone, specifically going out at night. The nightlife will be calling your name, dear. You will be bombarded with attention when this does happen. You are socially awkward but it’s okay, they won’t bite. The environments where you’ll be at will be filled with welcoming characters that make you feel safe. I feel like some of you will be trading services with another business owner (i.e., hairstyle for nail set, reading for reading, etc). Lastly, you guys need to go to karaoke bars, gay bars, go bar diving! Your self-esteem will go up, lol!

Cards Used: The Hermit, King of Cups, 7 of Cups, The Star, 2 of Swords (RX), Strength, 6 of Wands, The Tower.

extras: studded heels. drunk selfies. smoked out eyeliner. dragged. tea. money-hungry. marge simpson. katniss everdeen. facts about the royal kingdom.

Pile Four: This month will mark a special meeting between you and another person. A lot of you guys will be attending a wedding ceremony during this month, if you’re not already getting married. If you are getting married, just know that the stress is worth it dear. The ceremony will go great. But for the single folks, I feel like guys have been having a bad streak when it comes to dating/love. This will change at the wedding reception/ceremony. You will either meet someone who is exactly your type or you will catch the bouquet. I see that this person is tall, bright-eyed and very charming. This person will change your perspective on life. Outside of love, I feel like you guys will be working at some type of charity event. If you work somewhere with children involved, you will be assigned as the leader for the big task. You will handle it well. You could be in your 9H profection year or you could just be looking for your purpose in life. I feel like you will expand on your beliefs. You will visit different places of faith, travel to different neighborhoods and try new foods just to get a new perspective. I also think you will listen to music of different genres more often, specifically music with an island feel to it. If you have a science test coming up, you will pass it. And lastly, I feel like by the end of the month you will be on vacation. Whatever is going on at work will make you want to take a break. I see someone drinking RedBull to get through the day. I am also channeling the movie ‘The Last Holiday’. You should watch it! There is more to life than just working. You have some exploring to do, friend.

Cards Used: 9 of Wands, Temperance, 3 of Wands, The Hierophant, Queen of Cups, 3 of Discs.

extras: moonwalk. euphoria. small fry. tupperware. black lives matter. sagittarius placements. jupiter heavy. buoyancy. shameless (2011).

[skaterhoon]

Heat of the Night

Sypnosis: After a grueling week, you seek escape at a dimly lit bar, where you meet Sunghoon, a flirtatious bartender. As he serves you with playful charm, the chemistry between you two ignites. His daring whispers and heated glances lead to an intense, passionate encounter, turning a simple night out into an unforgettable experience.

now playing: diet pepsi - addison rae

genre: smut

warnings: nsfw and explicit language

(no plot literally just smut)

wc: 1.9k

You slumped into your apartment, the weight of the week pressing down on you. Work had been relentless, with deadlines and demands piling up, leaving you feeling drained and overwhelmed. The stress was constant, and you needed a break—a chance to escape from the pressures that had consumed your life.

You poured yourself a drink, hoping it would help you unwind, but the stress lingered. A night out seemed like the only remedy, a chance to blow off steam and momentarily forget the strain of work.

The dimly lit bar you walked into was a welcome change from the chaos of your week. The soft glow of neon lights and the low murmur of conversation provided a contrast to the harsh fluorescent lights of the office. The music pulsed softly in the background, helping you start to relax.

As you approached the bar, you noticed the bartender with a confident air and a warm smile. He was busy mixing drinks, but his gaze met yours, and he offered a quick, knowing smile. You made your way over, feeling a bit of tension starting to ease.

Sunghoon wiped his hands on a towel and leaned against the counter as you approached. “Hey there,” he said, his voice smooth and inviting. “What can I get for you tonight?”

You looked up, intrigued by his easy charm. “Just a beer, please.”

Sunghoon nodded, grabbing a bottle from the fridge. “You’re really pretty,” he said casually, handing you the beer with a slight grin.

You smiled, feeling a bit more at ease. “Is that your way of flirting with me?”

Sunghoon’s smile widened, his gaze lingering on you. “Maybe. But I’d say you’re pretty captivating. I wouldn’t mind getting to know you better.”

You raised an eyebrow, a playful glint in your eye. “Oh really? And how do you plan to do that?”

He leaned closer, his voice dropping to a seductive whisper. “Well, if I had my way, I’d bend you over this bar right now and make you forget all about your problems.”

The boldness of his words made you shiver with a mix of excitement and nervous anticipation. You met his gaze, feeling a rush of desire and curiosity.

With a knowing smile, Sunghoon guided you to a quieter corner of the bar. The atmosphere was charged with an electric intensity as he led you to a more private space, away from the bustling crowd. The cool night air from the slightly open window contrasted with the heat of the moment as he closed the distance between you.

When you were alone, Sunghoon’s hands were on you almost immediately, his touch urgent and possessive. The moment you were against the wall, his lips crashed onto yours with a fierce passion. The kiss was intense, his tongue exploring your mouth with a hungry fervor.

His hands roamed your body with a roughness that made your knees weak. You moaned into his kiss, your fingers tangling in his hair, pulling him closer. Sunghoon's hands slipped under your shirt, his touch burning against your skin. His fingers grazed your stomach before deftly unhooking your bra, the straps sliding down your arms. His mouth left yours to trail kisses down your neck and chest.

He pushed your shirt up, exposing your breasts to him. Sunghoon’s hands cupped them, his thumbs brushing over your nipples with a teasing touch. You gasped at the sensation, your body arching into his touch. His mouth moved lower, his lips closing around one of your nipples. His tongue flicked against the sensitive bud, the sensation sending shivers down your spine. You moaned loudly, your hands gripping his shoulders as he lavished attention on your chest.

Sunghoon’s hands traveled down to your waistband. He swiftly unbuttoned your jeans, his fingers deftly pulling down the zipper. The jeans slid down your hips, revealing your underwear. He kissed a path down your stomach, his breath hot against your skin, until he reached the waistband of your panties. He looked up at you with a predatory smile.

“Can I?” he asked, his voice a low rumble.

You nodded eagerly, breathless with anticipation. Sunghoon slid your panties down, exposing you to him. His gaze darkened with desire as he traced his fingers through your folds, his touch light but electrifying. He kissed your inner thigh, his lips brushing over your sensitive skin. You shivered, a mix of anticipation and need coursing through you.

His tongue flicked out, brushing against your clit. You gasped, your back arching as the sensation hit you. Sunghoon’s mouth was relentless, alternating between licking and sucking, his movements skilled and intoxicating. Each flick of his tongue made you moan louder, your body reacting instinctively to his touch. The heat in your core was unbearable, the pleasure building with every stroke.

Sunghoon’s fingers slid into you, stretching you as his tongue continued its assault. You cried out, the combination of his fingers and mouth pushing you closer to the edge. Your hips bucked against him, the pleasure overwhelming as he worked you over with expert precision.

He pulled back briefly, his breath hot and heavy as he looked up at you. “You’re so beautiful like this,” he said, his voice rough with desire. Then he leaned back in, his tongue flicking rapidly against your clit as his fingers moved in a steady rhythm inside you.

The coil inside you tightened, every touch, every stroke driving you nearer to the brink. “Sunghoon, I’m gonna—” you gasped, but he silenced you with a deep, hungry kiss. His fingers continued their relentless pace, plunging into you with a rhythm that matched the intensity of his kiss. Your body trembled as the orgasm built, the pressure inside you reaching a fever pitch.

When you finally came, it was with a cry of release, your body shaking with the intensity of the orgasm. Sunghoon watched you with a satisfied grin, his fingers still moving inside you, coaxing every last bit of pleasure from your body. He pulled away, his face flushed with desire, and quickly shed his own clothes. His cock was hard and straining, and the sight of him made you ache with need.

He guided himself to your entrance, his gaze locked on yours. With a smooth, deliberate motion, he pushed into you. The feeling of him filling you was overwhelming, every inch of him stretching you perfectly. You gasped, your body reacting instinctively to the intrusion.

Sunghoon’s thrusts were relentless, each movement sending waves of pleasure through your body. He set a steady rhythm, his hips driving into you with a force that made you moan loudly. The pleasure was intense, your body tightening around him with each thrust.

“Look at you,” he grunted, his eyes never leaving yours. “Taking me so well.” His words were filthy, but they only fueled your desire. You clawed at his back, urging him on as the pleasure built.

Sunghoon’s breathing grew ragged, his thrusts becoming more erratic as he neared his own climax. “I’m gonna cum,” he growled, his voice filled with raw need.

You nodded, lost in the sensation. With a final, powerful thrust, Sunghoon came with a deep, guttural groan, his release filling you completely. The warmth of his cum and the force of his orgasm pushed you over the edge one last time, your body convulsing with the intensity of your own climax.

For a moment, the only sounds in the room were your heavy breathing and the distant hum of the city outside. Sunghoon collapsed beside you, his body still trembling with the aftershocks of his release. He pulled you close, his touch gentle and loving, his lips pressing tender kisses to your forehead.

[a-d-nox]

pac/pap: what is changing in your life this season?

take what resonates leave what doesn't - nothing is 100% for you because these aren't personalized so please no angry comments or dms about what i am saying not being a good fit for you or that you "don't claim" just keep scrolling if that is the case. be kind, self reflect, and have fun.

last pac/pap: how can i present myself in the best way possible?

masterlist of pap/pac posts

want a personal reading? click here to check out my reading options and prices!

pile 1

you might be meeting someone new who brings a fresh perspective or emotional depth into your life; it could be a friend, partner, and/or mentor. this is also a great time to start a new artistic endeavor; painting, writing, or crafting, which will allow you to express yourself in unexpected ways. personal growth can occur through these activities as well as they aid with introspection or therapy, leading to a better understanding of your own feelings and needs. engaging in and/or receiving unexpected acts of kindness that uplift your spirits and encourage you to connect more deeply with others will greatly benefit you this season. receiving and/or giving thoughtful and heartfelt gestures in a romantic relationship will deepen emotional bonds. that being said addressing and healing past emotional wounds is critical, this will lead to a renewed sense of peace and emotional clarity.

there might be a new opportunity for growth in your career/investments. prioritize your self-care and personal well-being this season; perhaps through adopting healthier habits and/or finding more balance in your life. don't shy away from practical advice that will help you manage everyday responsibilities more effectively. you could experience increased productivity in your work and/or personal life; which could be supported by your increased organization and focus this season.

you are likely to find yourself making quick decisions and/or decisively acting to pursue your goals, even if it means facing challenges head-on. make sure you are engaging in stimulating conversations or debates, where sharp thinking and clear communication are crucial. this will help you make the correct decision for you long term. also make sure you are using your logic and analytical skills to cut through confusion and to help you solve problems efficiently. it is time to address conflicts or misunderstandings directly.

pile 2

you may experience unexpected expenses, find it hard to save money, and/or face a temporary loss of income. make budgeting and financial planning your focus starting now. as there could be delays or obstacles in your career, such as a promotion being postponed, a job offer falling through, or feeling unmotivated/uninspired at work. minor health issues or feeling physically drained could arise; you need to pay more attention to your well-being, diet, and/or exercise routines. you may find it difficult to concentrate on tasks which leads to unfinished work and/or feeling scattered. your investments (financial or otherwise) may not yield the expected returns, causing you to rethink where you’re putting your resources (and time) in to. you could be questioning what’s truly important to you, leading to a shift in how you view success, happiness, and/or stability.

you may feel trapped in a situation (relationship and/or job) without a clear way out. which could lead to frustration or a sense of helplessness because you’re unsure how to move forward. is it the universe or you? it might just be you who is resisting necessary changes; holding onto the familiar out of fear of the unknown (even if it’s not in your best interest). otherwise, instead of taking the time to think things through, you might make hasty decisions that lead to you feeling as sense of regret. you could find yourself holding onto past hurts, grudges, and/or regrets, which prevent you from moving forward with a clear and open mind.

you might feel like you’re not making progress, even though you’ve put in a lot of effort. there’s a sense of being stuck or not being able to move on to the next phase of your life. i feel like it is unresolved issues or "loose ends" that need your attention before you can truly move forward. this could involve past relationships, projects, and/or personal matters that require closure. it may be a struggle to find closure in certain situations, whether it’s ending a relationship, leaving a job, and/or moving on from a past experience. this lack of closure can prevent you from fully embracing new opportunities. there is a sense of disconnection from others and/or from your sense of purpose. there could be a feeling of isolation / lack of harmony in your relationships or within yourself. the time is now to wrap things up or learn better coping mechanisms.

pile 3

you may find yourself managing multiple priorities or projects - prepare yourself mentally for taking more on. life may throw some curveballs your way; you will be required to adapt quickly. go with the flow and handle changes with grace - this will be essential. budgeting and/or managing money might be a key focus for you this season as well. you need to organize your time better to accommodate all of your commitments, both personal and professional.

projects and/or plans that you hoped would move forward might encounter unexpected setbacks. which could lead to frustration and/or a feeling that things are not progressing as you thought they would. you might struggle to see the bigger picture, causing you to hyper-focus on immediate problems and not the long-term. which could pigeon hole you or decrease your opportunities upcoming. now is a good time to re-evaluate your current goals and/or strategies. rethink which direction you want to head to ensure it aligns with your true desires and capabilities. also this season there may be issues with teamwork and/or "your cooperation". misunderstandings and/or a lack of support from others is likely.

otherwise, there is something worth celebration happening for you this season; whether it’s a party, a reunion, or any event that brings your people together. enjoy the company of friends and loved ones - celebrate your achievements and/or special occasions this season. your social circle and friendships are going to be more important than ever this season. you might find yourself relying on your friends for support or just enjoying each others company. reminder: you don’t have to go through things alone; there are people who care about you and are willing to help.

[c0llisiion]

OBSESSION — m.yg

★pairing : min yoongi + fem!reader

★genre : smut

★: perv!myg , neighbour!au , drabble , panty sniffing , masturbation — lmk if i missed any! ^^

★W/C: 965

A/N : hiiii! I made this a drabble cus i be going through that writers block fever 🤒 its kinda rusty and eh imo but LOLLL hope you enjoyed it! I will try writing more!

☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★ MDNI. Please refrain from reading if the topics make you uncomfortable. ☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★

Perv neighbor Yoongi, who has been dying to have a taste of you since the day you moved into the apartment opposite his. He has been crushing on you ever since you walked up to his door to introduce yourself as his new neighbor. You had baked him cookies as a sign of friendship, but he wasn’t interested in them.

Yoongi thought you were absolutely beautiful. The moment you started talking to him with your soft, sultry voice, he fumbled internally. He didn’t even pay attention to what you were saying and was just staring at you in awe. His eyes scanned your body. That little crop tee and those Hello Kitty PJ pants fitted you perfectly. Your midriff was out, and he noticed the pink twinkling belly piercing. You looked so gentle and kind. He admired everything about you. And from then on, it was his mission to make you his.

But he was shy and reserved. He would see you occasionally whenever you accidentally bumped into him or something like that. But he wanted more. And so he began talking to you more often. He had analyzed your schedule and timetable by now. At around 6:30 a.m., you wake up and head to the gym. Yoongi wasn’t a gym freak at all. But when he found out you were going? He immediately joined your gym. It was a headache to wake up every day at 6 a.m. and go, but it did make yours and his relationship stronger than before. After you found out he was now going to your gym, you started talking to him more. Asking him about his workout plans, his diets, and his schedule, which Yoongi had no idea about, so of course he lied to you about them. Yoongi's eyes never left your presence. The sole reason he even joined this stupid gym was for him to get more of your beautiful body. He would stare at you shamelessly as you did your set of squats. His eyes are on your plump ass at all times. He would get hard at just seeing your ass and would rush into the gym lockers to rub one out real quick, his pale hands gripping onto his long dick. He imagined you doing it for him, but of course it wasn’t enough. You both would walk home together, which gave him the opportunity to learn about you more. He liked how dainty you were. You had this hard, tough girl exterior, but in reality, you were the complete opposite.

After your workouts, he would accompany you to the laundromat. But as time went by, he would offer to take your set of laundry whenever he went. You appreciated that and were very grateful to him. You were getting busy with college anyway, so your time was limited. Little did you know, he was stealing your panties. The only reason he offered to take your load was so he could be a sick weirdo and steal your used panties. He would rummage through the piles of clothes and carefully pick out one of your pink lace panties and stuff them into his pocket. He had the urge to take them all, but he wasn’t going to let you find out that he had been stealing them, right?

He would drop off the clean load at your doorstep before rushing into his own home. He wouldn't even have the patience to go into his room. Your scent was in his grasps, and he couldn’t waste anytime! He would spread his legs out as he sat on his couch, pulling out his aching cock. He would be as hard as a rock. His pink tip now an angry red with precum oozing out. With his shaky hands, he brought the undergarment to his nose, and as soon as his nose got a slight sniff of your panties, he was in heaven. He pressed the undergarment to his nose with great force, taking huge sniffs of your arousal. He loved it. He had no shame about it. It was intoxicating. He moaned into the piece of fabric as his other hand was gliding up and down his shaft with speed. Now that he knew how you smelled, he was able to imagine you bouncing on his dick. Your name left his mouth in audible moans. He was humping his own hand, not being able to control himself. He stuffed the garment into his mouth, now getting a taste of your arousal. His eyes shut tight, his eyebrows furrowed, and sweat dripped down his black locks. His now-free hand crept up his shirt, tugging and pulling on his erect nipples for more stimulation. His breathing was heavy, and his body was writhing uncontrollably. He envisioned your fucked-out face moaning and being a pretty little mess for him. His cum all over your pussy and your ass. His hips jerked up at the thought, and he was whining like a bitch. Muffled moans of your name escaped his pretty lips every second. Tears were forming in his eyes as he was getting closer and closer to his goal. His hands continued moving up and down, increasing the speed and grip. 

He let out a final, choked-out gasp as he came all over his lower belly and hands. He was cumming a lot. All that pent-up desire , finally spilling out. He laid completely still, stabilizing his breath. He finally came down from his high, taking your now-drool-stained panties out of his mouth. He heard a faint knock on his apartment door, which prompted him to quickly clean himself up and put his composure back on. He opened the door to see you. Standing in front of his door. In utter shock. It seemed like you heard everything.

A/N: hihihi hello thank you 4 readingg! <33 i might write another part if i have the time lol my inbox is open rn! I might take time to respond or write so please be patient w me! 💀🤌😭 i did some tweaking to my blogs hehe new year new me fr

[vers150516]

The day Max finally decides to retire, I’m of course going to be upset but I’m genuinely going to be so excited for him. We all know how much he’s looking forward to it and he can finally be free from all the pile ons from media and fans. For the first time he can just do what HE wants, when he wants.

I can already picture it. Him sitting on a beach somewhere with a gin&tonic and probably his own kids running around (while his 100cats are waiting at home). No more diet plans or strict workout routines (which we know he hates) and just living a quiet life surrounded by his family and friends.

He’ll of course go on to probably drive WEC, Le Mans and focus most of his time and money into forging a pathway from sim racing to real life motorsports.

And don’t get me wrong, Max is very clearly passionate about F1 but he hates everything that comes with it- fame, PR, the show element, the exposure. I think when he’s finally ready to leave it behind he’s going to feel a sense of freedom and god damn does he deserve it after everything he’s gone through.

[tarotmundomonde]

Next 5 months general reading

pick a number 1-5 OR an emoji 🔨 💰 ✒️ 🪙 ⚖️

(ps. this reading is for practice and for fun)

1.🔨 For pile 1, you have a lot of people showing up in your reading. It does look like you'll have a strong social life for the next 5 months. A lot of good news and celebrations. For some, maybe a new home and/or renovating, like painting your walls, buying new furniture and the such. Don't make hasty decisions! It looks like you'll deal with a lot of anxiety and stress, fears and doubts. There is a reference to usually the first answer you had in mind is the right one, aka don't second guess. A lot of decisions to make, devotion, plans, communication. Things that happen fast and things that happen slowly. You will be taking the lead and get your way. I'm sensing making your dreams come true. It will require determination and effort. It looks like there is someone you look up to as well, maybe a role model or just someone you respect and think highly of. In general it looks good and quite mundane. Now, let's dive a little deeper into the reading. There is a strong reference to walking your path. You need to find it or to stick to it. A lot of passionate energy towards your goals. Also, maybe you are into going on a walk. Maybe you'll even do some sight-seeing. And there will be a focus on your nervous system. So you'll need to work on that. This could be even due to coffee or energy drink addiction. But you need to find a way to break free and to transmute the extra nervous energy so you can have better sleep at night or just in general to learn to relax. You have a lot of messages about letting go. You definitely have the power to release all of that nervous energy. Also, overall in regards to your health, you are able to heal and working on improving your health will bring you great positive results during the next 5 months. You also have a message about vanity and your social life. You want to make sure you don't overly isolate yourself just because you are busy, but you could benefit isolating yourself from vanity. Another message coming through is music. Looking at the spread, it looks like this could be a method to relax yourself. But you could be in the music industry or do music, study music, etc. If you are some kind of a musician, it looks like you'll be doing great and be more creative and productive in that sense. The cards are showing that it's going to be time for you to let yourself shine. There is also reference to mutual respect. Working as a team, creations, contracts and promises will be of significance for you for the next 5 months. It's going to be a time of saying yes, a time of initiation and action, like a fertile time to make things happen and grow. A time of dedication and strong focus. Without forgetting about your health in every single way. To take time for yourself, to focus on yourself and improve your health. Looking at the cards, it looks like it will be rather easy for you to manage it all and you will see the results, especially on the energetic level, like feeling more energetic, having more energy and self-confidence.

2.💰 For pile 2, it's clear that the focus is on money, finances and work/school and the daily life. It looks like you have all the support you need, money is great, you have all you need and there are new doors for you in education/career. However, you do have a few challenges as well. You could find yourself to be indecisive or that you cannot manage all you want to. You simply can not keep all the doors open and you can not have control over everything. You could feel stuck and you may need to change directions. The other thing is bad news. You could have health problems. But it looks like you can overcome them by working on having a strong routine and healthy diet. Now, let's dive a little deeper into the reading. You literally got the workaholic card! You also got a lot of longterm timing cards. So there will be great focus on the longterm and the future. Maybe even projects, where you have to create a very solid schedule. When it comes to healing, perhaps sound and colour healing could be of significance for you, so if you are interested, look them up. Because there is a focus on listening. Of course, maybe you work with sounds and colours, like media, creating websites, videos, etc. But there is great focus on communication and listening is very important. It looks like if you are too opinionated, you are not truly hearing, what you are told, but you hear what you want to hear or don't even really listen and that's why there could be unnecessary misunderstandings. So listening and learning to listen and to pay attention will be crucial for you. Also, because you could miss out on important little details, like it seems you need to expand your way of thinking. And other people could have great ideas for you. There will be also focus on symbolism and reading between the lines. And all that said, of course, forgiveness. It also means to know, when to apologize. You'll have to work on mercy, being compassionate, forgiveness and on releasing and relief. You have a lot of mentions of wisdom, so the next 5 months will be a time of learning some lessons, especially in regards to communication. Remember, you are meant to learn these lessons, so let go and let flow. Other than that, there will be new beginnings. Remember that once you commit to something, you'll have to stay committed to that matter. For example, if you take some classes, you have to take them till the end, go to the exams, etc. But it looks like there will be plenty of abundance, growth and fulfilment, rewards and solid foundations established during the next five months.

3.✒️ Huge energies, pile 3. Major theme is balance. For some of you, you could be pregnant or getting pregnant. It looks like all will be well for the next 5 months, so if you give birth during that time, it looks like there will be no complications. Another theme is healing. Clarity. It looks like a more passive time, you'll have to really be patient. You are more in a place of receiving and of receptivity. Also, significant partnerships. Now, let's dive a little deeper into the reading. You could have major moodswings. Now that could be something typical of you. Otherwise, it could be due to the situations you will be facing. First of all, you will be dealing with temptation, bad habits. If you are into gossiping, the cards are saying that's a bad habit. You could feel guilty about something or some habits. But the cards are showing that you have the power to overcome your bad habits. Then, it also looks like people will have many opinions about you, quick to judge you and there will be lots of gossips about you. So it would be better for you to keep your things to yourself. It doesn't matter, if it's romance, friendships, at school, at work, etc, but during this time you are better off keeping your things to yourself. People will gossip about you. You will have fears to face, but you can turn it into fuel. It's time for you to own your power. Stand still, wait and watch. Dang, people are really watching you, even when you don't notice that. And that includes social media. You really have so many eyes on you. And it's really all about gossip, wanting to gossip about you. People are obsessed with doing so about you. But if you stay patient and just watch and keep things to yourself, things will come naturally to light. The people, the reasons, the answers will come to you. The cards do say there is no need to worry, as now you know. You have a lot of messages about perception in your reading. It's going to be a matter of how you look at things. Changing your perspective can benefit you. But also, just take in the view. Enjoy life. Look outside the window, if you like someone, enjoy the view of them, etc. Also, look at all you have, be grateful. There is a lot of wisdom available to you at this time. Also, whatever you do most of the day, focus and create with intention. You know what are your best ways at learning something or at doing something. You could also be looked up to or there could be someone you can learn a lot from. Whether it's your teacher or boss or counsellor, etc. But there seems to be someone, who can teach you things. You also have a message about recovery. So it seems you'll be fine. The cards are also talking about playing and having fun and adding more laughter into your life. Although, it seems it will happen naturally, as it looks like you are going to have a time of abundance and peace and contentment, but also of excitment! And perhaps you'll travel or go on a trip as well.

4.🪙 For pile 4, you have a lot of people card showing up for you in this reading. There will be a massive transition or transformation happening in your life during the next 5 months, maybe a whole overhaul even. Lots of messages and news, maybe even invitations, letters. Maybe a lot of purchases, like books, essentials, even maybe a new laptop, etc. New hobbies or just hobbies and projects in general. I'm also seeing learning from other people, like learning by watching and then trying the same yourself. Travelling or relocating is possible. You will be busy, but still it looks like you are heading towards better times. Just remember to delegate your chores and such. Emotionally you will master your emotions at this time. You could feel like you are doing what you are supposed to be doing, like you feel fulfilled in that sense. Now, let's dive a little deeper into the reading. You have a lot of messages about stillness and resting. Also, to pause for a minute and really pay attention to the little details, to signs. Like if you are looking at a picture, look at the details, look at the symbols. If let's say you are taking a exam, take a pause to really look at the details, pay attention to them. There is something that could be easily overlooked but makes a huge difference. You have messages about discovery and recovery. Also, to not give up. And there is something that will be unlikely. You also have a huge focus on your looks. Nourishment is coming through, glamour as in how you dress, maybe you are looking for a more dramatic look. Because the cards are talking about the need for you to be your more authentic self. To dare to be independent in that sense, in the way you look, in the way you carry yourself and express yourself. Apparently, you will also be surrounded by some drama. No wonder there is such a focus on stillness. And also, your life energy. So nourishment is going to be highlighted in that sense. A time of healing. It will be your turn to land gracefully, to have your own after glow. I also see beauty sleep. And eyes on the prize. Like said before, it's not time to give up, it's time to keep going.

5.⚖️ For pile 5, the focus will be on you and partnerships. A time to find balance and peace within, acceptance, actively working on your emotions. It seems you'll have dreams you want to pursue, fearlessly following your desires and passion. A lot of movement. There is a focus on your needs and what you want and need. Also, on your abundance, finances, what you own and health. There could be some conflicts of interest, so much you wanna do. But also, drama and competition. It's like it would be better to take a step back and first see what's going on. You have eyes on you. Self-care. Possibly romance. On one hand, it looks very mundane but very active. You'll be busy. Now, let's dive a little deeper into the reading. There is definitely a strong theme of learning lessons, to see the bigger picture, understanding and higher heart healing. Maybe even ancestral healing. You are called to heal and ascend and to recognize your purpose. Peaceful resolution. I also see the possibility for travelling and sight-seeing. But it could be also just higher interest to visit museums and such. I see history here and also expansion and high views like going to high places and looking at the views. You could also be taking classes or maybe you are a student. A lot about intentions and purpose. You'll be having a lot of questions and questioning your beliefs and people's beliefs, flipping everything upside down. Maybe it's related to your studies. Also, patience and planning, plans, co-operation, teamwork. Abundance and service is coming through as well. Wish wisely. A wish could come true, so really think about what you truly want and need the most at this time. And have faith. It also looks like you will be more childlike. Of course, you might have kids or be around kids. But otherwise, it's gonna be more your energy. Being more playful and curious, initiative, doing some silly and fun stuff and being open and warm. It's your time to shine and keep going. You might experience moments of laziness, so maybe that's when you'll tap more into that fun energy. But it's also possible that there is something you are gonna realize you are not that into and so you will not try to push it. For example it could be in romance or it could be a subject at school. And then protection. In romance, you know what it means. Otherwise, you are gonna step into your more warrior energy and also acts of kindness is coming through. That could be related to the service message, whether people are more kind towards you or you do that.

[letsquestjess]

To Be Held (Crosshair x GN!Reader)

Summary: Crosshair struggles with the tremor in his hand, but you are there to comfort him.

Word count: 1.2K

Warnings: Brief descriptions of nightmares and depression. Contains some spoilers for season 3!

-- -- -- -- --

You rounded the kitchen with a tune on your lips, collecting packets and paper bags and arranging the fresh produce onto the chopping board. A potato rolled from the pile, bouncing off the outstretched elbow you extended in an attempt to slow it. As it tumbled from the worktop, a hand darted out. 

“Nice catch,” you said to Crosshair as he straightened and picked out a few other vegetables from the hefty bundle. 

“I can help get these chopped up,” he offered, rolling up his shirt sleeves. “Although I have to ask, are you trying to feed the entire island?”

“Just your brothers,” you returned.  

The sniper chuckled to himself, lips curving into an endearing grin. He and his brothers had grown up on a diet consisting mostly of ration bars, protein drinks, and whatever meagre soups and over-baked breads the cafeteria served. Upon arriving on the picturesque island, the sheer variety of food options available had daunted him, but the more he tasted, the more he acclimated to the distinct tastes and innovative pairings. 

It was how he had met you. Market days on Pabu were an island-wide event, and Wrecker, ever eager to delve deeper into the culinary arts, dragged him along. His excuses ranged from wanting to experiment with new seasonings to needing help with meal planning, but he eventually admitted he just wanted to spend time with him. From that moment on, Crosshair attended every week without fail. 

Some months into their visits, you bumped into each other. Quite literally. After steadying the overflowing bags in your arms and assuring him you were unharmed, you both exchanged sheepish smiles and apologies, and parted ways. He saw you again the week after, and the week after that, your eyes meeting in silent recognition, until Omega intervened and nudged her brother to approach you. 

The thought of your first encounter comforted him, immersing him in a daydream that shattered the instant his hand began to tremor. He grumbled and clenched his fists, resolved to shove the annoyance aside and focus on assisting you with dinner. 

But you noticed. You picked up the irritated huff and the flex of his fist. “Are you all right?” you asked, setting down the knife and scooping the chopped vegetables into the simmering pan of water. His silence hung heavy, and you stopped what you were doing. “Cross?” 

“I’m fine,” he replied, gruffer than he intended. Squeezing his eyes shut for a brief second, he refocused and carried on slicing the washed potatoes into chunks. 

Over the last few weeks, you had observed a subtle tremor in his hand and a faraway expression. It never lasted for more than a few minutes, but you sensed he was confined in that desolate cell once more, on that unrelenting experiment table. He had spent countless months trying to regain control, confronting his past rather than avoiding it. 

The risk of a relapse always remained, but you wished he wouldn’t endure them in silence and solitude. Omega’s meditations had offered a small reprieve, and the therapy he stuck at untangled the knotted vines in his head, allowing him to process his thoughts. But it was getting to him again, wriggling its way back in like an insidious vibroblade slicing into a disintegrating shield, smashing the defences he had fought so hard to maintain. 

As he brought the knife down, the blade grazed dangerously close to his finger. He jerked away and hissed a curse. 

“Okay,” you said with a gentle but resolute edge, taking control before the situation overwhelmed him further. “Sit down.”

“Dinner needs doing,” he insisted. 

“It can wait. Sit, love, please.” 

Reluctantly, the sniper snatched a dining chair and sank into the plush, patterned cushion tied to the back bars. 

After wiping the vegetable juices from your palms on a dishcloth, you brought his hands to your chest and pressed firmly, grounding him in the present and to you. “Can you feel the rhythm of my heart?” you asked. 

Crosshair nodded, wearied gaze lifting to meet yours. “Yes.”

“Close your eyes. That’s it. Concentrate on your breaths.” 

Within a few rounds of deep inhales and slow exhales, the trembles relaxed. You squeezed his hands, thumbs caressing the dry, calloused skin on his fingers. 

“I am so proud of you,” you said, softly, patiently. “You have fought to be where you are, Cross, and you never gave up. No matter how challenging it became, or the obstacles that stood in your path, you persevered. If only you could see yourself how others see you, you would understand how brave, and caring, and dedicated you are.” 

His eyes blinked open, and a subtle smile reappeared. “You missed ‘stubborn’ off that list.”

“How could I forget?” you chuckled.

He brought your closer by your hips and settled his cheek on your stomach. You were warm. Familiar. When the shadows crept in, you emerged as a shining beacon, restoring his sense of self and holding aloft that steadfast belief in him. Despite no longer being controlled by the Empire or serving in the army, the fear of relapsing haunted him, and he dreaded he would become that again. Cold and cruel to those he loved, and alone for the rest of his days.

“If you needed more therapy, or wanted to try something else, I am right here with you,” you told him, stroking the thick, silvery tufts he had been growing out. “Whatever you need.” 

Expressing himself had never come naturally to Crosshair. He attempted to reach out to his siblings after Tantiss, and in time you. In his mind, he recognised the intensity of his emotions, the words he longed to express, but he couldn’t get them past his mouth. It required an immense amount of effort for him to let his guard down, and in moments like these, when he wanted to vanish into some secluded corner, it became even harder. 

“I’m sorry,” he whispered against your stomach, his grip tightening as if you might slip away. “I just feel so…” 

Sacred. Frightened. Weak. You knew how that sentence ended. You’d heard it often enough on the nights he woke doused in sweat and hauling in trembling breaths, grasping for anything to bolster him in his safe reality. 

“It will all be okay,” you soothed, cradling him to you. “You are not alone. You have me, and your siblings, and an island of people here who cherish and appreciate you. We love you more than you know, and we will do whatever it takes to get you the support you need.”

“Right now,” he muttered, “I only need to hold you.” He nuzzled closer, burying himself in the solacing lift and fall of your stomach and the steady tempo of your heart. Each beat called out to him, and he eagerly listened. 

“I suppose I could allow that for a little longer,” you said brightly as he gazed up at you, the tattoo around his eye crinkling with a tired but hopeful smile. 

There were difficult times ahead, more nightmares, more lapses, more quiet in which his mind returned him to those days as a captive of the Empire. But through it all, he remained hopeful, and that was all you ever needed him to be. 

TAGLIST (Message if you’d like to be added, 18+ only)

@skellymom @freesia-writes @the-hexfiles @theeyesofasoldier @multi-fan-dom-madness @savebytheodoresnonjosestuff @tech-aficionado @techsriduur @dangraccoon @starrylothcat @jediknightjana @mssbridgerton @trixie2023

[justagalwhowrites]

Halcyon - Ch. 10: People Might Think You Care About Me

You and Joel spend the holidays together. A continuation of Halcyon from the prologue through Ch. 9, a modern no outbreak AU TLOU fic found on Tumblr here.

Again, I'm here begging HBO to give me something to use for young Joel PLZ

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader

Warnings: Mention of dieting and diet culture. Modern No Outbreak AU, No use of Y/N, Slow burn, 18+ only, Minors DNI

Length: 5.8K

AO3 | Main Master List | Prologue | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

“I can’t believe my kid is going to like you better than me,” Joel said, sitting in the middle of the living room floor with a roll of wrapping paper spread out in front of him. “Scissors.” 

You handed them over before grabbing the tape, putting a piece on the tip of your finger before folding the paper around the box - a friendship bracelet kit - that you were wrapping for Sarah. 

“I mean, first of all, your kid already likes me more than she likes you,” you teased, turning the box to do the other side. “She has good taste…” 

“You’re the worst.” 

“Second,” you said, ignoring him. “It is a joint gift, you’re getting tons of cool dad points out of this.” 

“She’s gonna know it was your idea,” he said, adjusting the gift he was wrapping. “Hell, she’s gonna know that only one of us could have gotten tickets and it ain’t me.”

As if on cue, Swiftie - Sarah’s kitten - pounced on the box Joel was wrapping. 

“Yeah, this one knows, too,” he said, scooping her up with one large hand and setting her down. “I miss when she wanted Barbies. Shit was easier.” 

You laughed. 

“Be happy she’s excited about anything enough that she’s going to freak out over Taylor Swift tickets,” you said. “She’s about to be a disaffected teenager, enjoy it while it lasts.” 

“Yeah, don’t remind me,” he muttered, “She’s stubborn enough as it is.” 

“You’re in for it, Miller,” you said as your cat, Puck, climbed on your lap. You reached around him to finish taping the package you were wrapping. “She’s going to give you so much shit…” 

“What if she’s just like you, hm?” Joel teased. “Gonna have a nerd for a kid…” 

“Hey, I was a nerd who snuck out at night to go get drunk with the boneheaded jock,” you teased back. “You really want her to be just like me?” 

“Jesus, you’re right,” Joel shook his head, finishing wrapping his present. “I’ll have to keep her far away from anyone like me for the sake of us all.” 

You snorted and finished wrapping your own gift before scooping Puck into your arms, nuzzling into his fur and giving him a kiss on the head before settling with your back against your couch as you looked at the lights on the tree.

It was Christmas Eve, the first one in years you were spending without Gale and you’d never been more thankful for Joel. 

Last year, you and Gale were separated but you’d felt so alone that you’d texted him the afternoon of Christmas Eve and spent most of the night and next day in bed. You’d tricked yourself then, pretended there was a chance in hell of the two of you getting back together and things going back to the way they used to be. 

That hadn’t happened. You’d spent New Year’s Eve in bed, too. Except that time, you were alone. 

You’d been afraid that was going to happen for you this holiday season, too. You asked Anna what she had planned for Christmas, fully expecting her to want to spend the day together. She had other things in mind. 

“Honestly, ever since Mom died?” She’d shrugged. “I love using it as a day to just chill. Binge watch TV I’ve been meaning to catch up on, eat a pile of Chinese food, maybe take a bath… It’s pretty boring but I love it. And since I’ve got this little bundle on the way, I’m extra looking forward to it this year.” 

“Oh,” you forced a smile, trying to hide your disappointment. “No, that sounds great.” 

“Oh God,” she clamped her hands over her mouth, eyes wide for a moment. “Did you want to do something? I’m so sorry, I should have…” 

“”No,” you waved her off quickly. “No, you’re good! I don’t want to disrupt your plans…” 

“You can join if you want!” She said. “I mean, for everything but the bath part, that might be a little much now that we’re not kids anymore.” 

“No,” you said again. “You have fun! Tradition is tradition and you need the break. Maybe I’ll do the same.” 

You should have known that she would have her own way of doing things. You’d all but abandoned her during your marriage, sending perfunctory text messages and holiday cards and flying her up for a long weekend every year or so but, otherwise, you went weeks without talking. Of course she had Christmas plans that didn’t involve you. Why would she have any that did? 

Joel, however, had done what he’d always done since you’d moved back to Texas: Made room for you in his life. 

“Know you and Anna probably already got plans but,” he’d shrugged two weeks earlier. “If you don’t… want to spend Christmas with me n’Sarah? Tommy, too, assuming he doesn’t con his way into dinner at some girl’s house. S’OK if you don’t, just figured… I dunno…” 

You’d smiled, bigger than you’d really meant to. 

“You want me to spend Christmas with you?” 

“I want you to spend most days with me,” he shrugged. “But you know, we gotta go out in the world and make money and shit. Anyway, Christmas. You in? Could just move in until the New Year if you really wanted…” 

The last part wasn’t going to work with your obligation to go try to write a book once Christmas was through. But you had spent the last two nights at Joel’s, bringing Puck over to play with Sarah and Swiftie as the three of you watched Christmas movies and binged cookies. No papers to grade, no lawyers calling because your attorneys’ offices were closed, no pressure because you already had time set aside to write. You could really relax for the first time in what felt like an eternity and relaxing with Joel and Sarah was quickly becoming your favorite thing in the entire world. 

But all that relaxing had meant there was a small pile of presents that weren’t wrapped that needed to make it under the tree. It was Christmas Eve and time had run out. 

“You need to stop procrastinating,” you said, getting your egg nog that was now mostly liquor off the coffee table and taking a sip. “Can’t get away with that shit when you’re a business owner.” 

“Just watch me,” he teased. “Besides, you’re one to talk, you made any progress on that book?” 

“That’s what next week is for,” you said, giving the cat a kiss just as he started to get restless in your arms. You set him down. “Fingers crossed having nothing else to do will make me churn out the words.” 

“Wild to me that you make money from what’s in your head,” Joel came and sat next to you. “Not that I think you shouldn’t, if anyone should it’s you. Just that anyone does at all is insane.” 

“Well, I may not make money off it for long if I can’t write anything else,” you sighed. “Know what? Let’s not talk about next week. I want to live in this moment - the one where we don’t have any worries and the presents are all under the tree and Sarah is passed out - for a while longer yet.” 

Joel hummed in agreement and you leaned your head on his shoulder, sighing contentedly. You could smell his skin and cologne and there was still a little bacon scent from when he’d made breakfast for the three of you that morning. 

“Think she’ll have a good Christmas?” Joel asked quietly, the two of you watching the lights twinkle on his tree. 

“Hell yeah,” you smiled a little. “You really are an amazing Dad, Joel.” 

He scoffed. 

“I’m serious,” you peered up at him. “You’re lucky to have Sarah but she’s lucky as hell to have you, too. She’s going to love it.” 

“Speaking of parents… anything new in the Anna situation?” Joel asked cautiously. 

“It’s a girl,” you sighed. “But she seems to be keeping up with everything, thank God. Maybe I’m wrong, maybe this is the kick in the ass she’s been needing…” 

“Was for me,” Joel shrugged, making your head rise with his shoulder. 

You sighed again. 

“Just seems like an awful lot to put on a kid,” you said. “And you might have been young and dumb but you didn’t have the shit Anna’s got on her plate. It’s a bit of a different story with her.” 

“She might surprise you. But either way, we’ll make up a room for the little sucker here,” Joel said. “Just to be safe.” 

“Regardless, that’s next year Goldie and Joel’s problem,” you said. “And thank fuck for that.” 

“Yeah, fuck those two,” you could hear the smile on Joel’s voice. “Let’s put the wrapping paper away and go to bed, something about Santa and knowing when you’re sleeping and all that.”

You cleaned up the living room and tried not to pay attention to the nighttime routine you’d fallen into with Joel in the few days you’d been staying with him. You had your own sink in Joel’s bathroom, one that had your hair products and face wash lined up alongside it. You had your own side of the bed with your own nightstand where the book you’d been reading the last few days was nearing its end and waiting for you. If you thought about it too much, you’d miss it when it was gone. If you thought about it too much, it might seem like something you could keep.

Joel made his customary space at his side and you nestled into him, your head on his chest where you could hear his heart beat. His fingers trailed up and down your arm. 

“There are upsides to a kid, you know,” he said quietly. “Christmas morning is one of ‘em. Just wait.” 

You smiled a little. 

“Stop keeping me awake and we won’t have to wait long,” you said. 

Joel snorted. 

“Yeah yeah. Night Goldie.” 

“Night Joel.” 

Sarah came careening into Joel’s room before 7 a.m., slamming into the bed so hard that it made your teeth rattle. 

“Dad! Aunt Goldie!” She shook you both. “Wake up, it’s Christmas!” 

“Yeah, alright,” Joel groaned, taking his warm arm from its place around your shoulders. You groaned, too. “You stay here with Goldie while I go put the coffee pot on and get set up to record you…” 

Sarah groaned. 

“Seriously?” 

“Seriously,” he said. “Sit tight, five minutes.” 

You rolled onto your back and blinked the sleep from your eyes, Sarah bouncing impatiently on the bed. You lifted your head enough to look at her, curls sticking every which way, and you dropped back down onto the pillow with a groan. 

“You’re lucky you’re cute, kid,” you said. 

“Yeah, that’s what my dad says,” she said cheerfully and you could picture her smile as she did. 

“Alright, come on out,” Joel called from the living room. Sarah rocketed off the bed and you laughed as you got up yourself, trailing behind her and trying not to yawn. 

“Oh cool!” Sarah flopped down beside her stocking and started going through it as you got to the living room. Joel was sitting on the couch, his phone set up on a tripod in the corner and pointed at the tree. “These are those face mask things I said I wanted! And the headbands for soccer!” 

“I do pay attention now and then, baby girl,” Joel said, rubbing his eyes. 

“Don’t you mean Santa pays attention?” You asked, sitting next to him on the couch. Joel handed you a cup of coffee, made exactly how you liked it.

“I know Santa’s not real, Aunt Goldie,” Sarah rolled her eyes and gave you a look. “I’m 11, not a kid.” 

Joel snorted. 

“Sorry,” you said. “My mistake.” 

“Don’t spoil Santa for Goldie,” Joel said before reaching down on the ground next to him. “Speaking of which…” 

He handed you a fat stocking and you frowned a little as you took it. 

“You made me a stocking?” You asked, tears pinching at your throat. “No one’s made me a stocking since I was in high school…” 

“Then you’re real overdue,” he smiled a little and went back to watching Sarah as she unwrapped a chocolate Santa and stuffed the entire thing in her mouth. “Alright, let’s not eat all the candy in one sitting…” 

“But it’s Christmas!” She said, voice muffled around the chocolate. 

“Still gonna get sick,” he replied. 

You started unpacking the stocking, pulling two pairs of fuzzy socks out of the top. 

“Because your feet are always freezing,” he said, looking back at you. “Figured one pair for here, one for your house…” 

“Thank you,” you smiled, going back into the stocking. There was some of your favorite candy, one of the face masks Sarah had, a bottle of gold nail polish. 

“We can do a spa day!” She beamed. 

“We can,” you laughed, looking at Joel who just shrugged, a small smile on his face. 

At the bottom of the stocking was a chunky gold pen, thick plastic encasing glitter and you turned it over in your fingers, frowning for a moment at just how familiar it felt. 

“Saw one like the one you had when we were kids years ago,” Joel said. “Bought it on a whim, thought you might want it.” 

You wanted to say thank you but you couldn’t seem to make a sound, the words caught in your throat. Instead, you just threw your arms around his neck and he laughed a little when he caught you, his hand sliding over your side and around to your back. 

You stayed close to Joel and watched as Sarah tore through her presents, the envelope with the concert tickets safely in Joel’s possession. 

“Hey Sarah,” you said eventually. “Can you hand me that box under there that’s for your dad?” 

Joel frowned as Sarah got the box, setting it on the coffee table in front of Joel and hovering as he went to open it. 

“Didn’t need to get me anything,” he said. 

“Too damn bad,” you said. “Don’t get too excited, it’s nothing crazy.” 

He opened it. Inside were two shot glasses, leather wrapped with a monogrammed M burned into it. 

“I thought you needed some accessories for the flask,” you smiled. 

He laughed. 

“We gotta break these in,” he said, looking them over. “They even look like they match…” 

“May have gotten Tommy to send me pictures,” you said. “Keep going, one more thing in there.” 

He shifted the tissue paper before pulling out a cassette tape, frowning at it for a moment. 

“What…” 

“I know your stereo is old enough that it plays tapes,” you said, palm out. “Hand it over.” 

He laughed once but obeyed and you went to put the tape in, adjusting the volume so it wouldn’t be too loud. It crackled a bit at the start and then Joel’s voice - almost 20 years younger but still so familiar - filled the room.

“My name is Joel Miller,” he said. “I play guitar and sing, mostly rock, little country…” 

Joel gaped at the stereo before looking to you. 

“Is this that old demo tape we made when we were kids?” He asked. You laughed and nodded. “Holy… where the hell’d you find this thing?” 

“I kept one,” you shrugged. “Thought it might give you a nudge toward playing again.” 

The Joel on tape started playing and Sarah came and sat between the two of you on the couch, looking up at her dad. 

“So that’s you?” She asked. 

“Sure is,” he said. “Long time ago, I was closer to your age then than mine now.” 

“What’s it for?” She asked. 

“Well,” Joel looked over her head to you and smiled a little before looking back at his daughter. “I always liked playing, wanted to be a singer for a while. Goldie here talked me into making some demo tapes to give to places around here that had open mic nights so I could actually play for people. Worked, too. Had a few places I played pretty often for a bit in there thanks to that tape.” 

“Why’d you stop?” She frowned. “You were good.” 

Joel shrugged. 

“Bigger things to do,” he kissed the top of her head. “Though speaking of music… think there might be one more thing for you under the tree.” 

Sarah’s frown deepened and she went to look around, picking her way through wrapping paper and but not finding it. 

“There’s nothing over here, Dad,” she said. “Are you sure?” 

“Oh, right,” Joel said, giving you a wink and pulling the envelope out of the pocket of his pajama pants. “Here it is.” 

She jumped over some of the boxes scattered over the floor and took the envelope from him, her eyebrows knitting together as she read the writing on the front. 

“To the swiftest music fan?” She said, looking up from the envelope and at the two of you. 

You just shrugged. 

“Gonna have to open it, kiddo,” Joel said. 

She slipped her fingers below the seal and pulled out the card, two pieces of paper falling to the ground before she had a chance to read it. She picked them up and unfolded them, reading the first one. 

“It says we have a hotel room in Dallas?” She looked at Joel. 

“Gotta read the other paper, baby girl,” he said. “That’s the important one. And the one from Aunt Goldie.” 

She flipped to that page next and only held it for a moment before shrieking and throwing herself at you, knocking you back into the couch. 

“You got Eras Tour tickets?” She pulled back, half on top of you and half on the couch. You just laughed and nodded. “Oh my GOD, thank you thank you thank you, you’re the best! OH MY GOD!” 

“Well your dad is the one getting us there and making sure we have a place to stay,” you said. “So hug him, too.” 

“Thank you!” She threw herself at him, too, and he laughed, catching her and giving her a squeeze. “This is the best present ever, it’s going to be the best time, I can’t wait! We’re going to see Taylor Swift! Oh my GOD, I have to tell my friends!” 

She shot off to her room to get her phone and Joel laughed, looking over at you. 

“OK I don’t even care that she likes you better n’me now,” he said. “She’s that happy? Worth it.” 

“We’ll see how we feel after a few days wrangling her for the Taylor Swift concert,” you said, watching where she’d disappeared up the stairs. “But… yeah, definitely worth it.” 

“Hey,” Joel said, voice oddly earnest. You looked over at him. “Thanks for loving my kid.” 

You smiled a little. 

“She’s yours,” you said. “How could I not?” 

Tommy came over a few hours later, once the turkey was in the oven and the wrapping paper was cleaned up off the floor. He gave Sarah a five pound bag of Sour Patch Kids and said “don’t tell your dad” before kissing the top of her head as she scampered off to stash her hoard in her room. He greeted you with a hug with a tight squeeze on the end and you still couldn’t quite get used to just how adult he was. There was part of you that still saw him as the little kid who trailed after you and Joel, the one who sometimes begged to go to Dairy Queen for a Blizzard. Now, he was nearly as tall as his older brother, drinking a beer and talking to Joel about a woman named Maria he’d just started dating. It was an odd reminder of just how much time you’d lost with Joel, just how much had changed. 

The four of you had dinner - Tommy teasing Sarah more like a loving older brother than an uncle, making you smile - and, before too long, the day was done. 

Sarah insisted on listening to Taylor Swift while she got ready for bed and Joel read to her from an Artemis Fowl book, you eavesdropping on Joel doing the voices from your place in the living room while the cats curled up around you. 

A keen sense of belonging settled over you then, as you held a mug of cocoa in one hand and the other rested on the back of your large, orange cat. This, you thought, was where you belonged. In this space, in this time, alongside these people. 

How could you ever hope to find this anywhere else? How were you ever supposed to recover from this stubborn crush if Joel was the place you felt most like home? 

“You OK?” Joel asked, hovering toward the top of the stairs, his hands in the pockets of his sweatpants. 

“Yeah,” you smiled and gave Puck a scratch and let yourself have the feeling. “I’m good.” 

You got up early the next morning, Joel barely awake enough to help carry your bags to the car. 

“See you New Year’s Eve,” he said, his hands in the pockets of his pajama pants and his hair in total disarray. “Better have that damn book done by then.” 

“Do you really think you can write an entire book in a week?” You asked, brows raised. 

“I dunno,” he said. “You’re the smart one, you tell me.” 

You rolled your eyes and he laughed a little. 

“Alright, I’m goin’ back to bed,” he said. “Text me when you get there, have fun being a genius.” 

“Hey,” you called to him as he made it halfway back up his walk. He turned to face you, frowning slightly. “Thanks. For being my friend.” 

An expression you couldn’t place passed over his face before he smiled a little. 

“Careful,” he said. “Talk like that enough, people might think you care about me and shit.” 

“Well, we can’t have that,” you said. “See you in a few days.” 

He watched you drive off and you made your way to the hill country and the cabin Stephanie had reserved for you. You’d insisted that it have extra bedrooms and a hot tub and were surprised that she hadn’t pushed back on it. 

“Whatever you need to get the job done, you’ve got it,” she said after sending you links to some cabins. “I’m just here to facilitate.” 

You stopped on the way for groceries, stocking up so you wouldn’t need to leave the house once you settled in. You went with most of your standbys for cooking for one and watching the careful diet you’d been on for years but then thought of Joel bringing you tamales and plying you with cookies over the last few days. Maybe he was right. Maybe you did need to live a little. You got the stuff to make the bagel sandwiches, too. 

The cabin was damn near idyllic, all stone and wood with huge windows looking out at the brush leading down to the lake in the backyard. The hot tub was set on the back porch, a fire pit in the yard and rocking chairs out front. The kitchen was large and reasonably well equipped and there were enough bedrooms that Joel, Tommy and Sarah could have their own when they all joined you for New Year’s Eve. There was even a desk set up near a window that overlooked the water and you set up your laptop and charger and got out your notebook with the pen from your Christmas stocking, arranging everything just so. 

“Alright,” you said to no one after you got the groceries put away and made yourself a cup of coffee before settling in at the desk to write. “Let’s do this.” 

And… you tried. You really, truly did. 

Day one, you got most of an outline done. Enough of one that you went to bed feeling somewhat accomplished and felt good treating yourself to a bagel sandwich in the morning. But then, when you sat down to work on the next part for day two, you weren’t sure you liked any of it anymore. You pressed on, anyway. Day three, you tried to write the first chapter and you made some decent progress, at least feeling like you were getting to know the characters a bit as you settled into the story. But, day four, you read what you’d written the day before and wanted to claw your way out of your skin. What were you doing? Why did you think you could do this at all? Had you ever made anything worthwhile on your own? Why would you suddenly be able to do it now? 

The text came through when you were taking a break for lunch, desperately avoiding the gnawing feeling of failure after days of accomplishing fuck all when you really had no excuse not to. You sighed and opened your texts, fully expecting from Joel or Anna or even Stephanie. 

It wasn’t. 

Hey Doll

You dropped your fork in shock and it clattered to your plate as you blinked at your phone in total shock. He was texting you. Why was he texting you? He hadn’t texted you in months, not since you’d left Rhode Island. Why now? Did you want to know? Could you resist knowing? 

Hi Gale

You propped your phone up against your half empty can of Diet Dr. Pepper and stared at the screen, waiting for the next shoe to drop. 

It didn’t take long. 

How’ve you been doing? 

Your hand shook as you replied. 

Alright. I like the new school. You?

He responded almost instantly. 

Not bad. Was just thinking about you. Miss you. 

You froze, your heart in your throat. 

He missed you. How could he just say that? The collapse of your marriage had been one of the most painful things you’d ever gone through, happening in slow motion as he pulled further and further away and you desperately tried to dig your nails in to keep him close. You’d all but begged for him to miss you for years and now he was just texting it to you out of the blue. How could he just say that? How could you pretend like it wasn’t what you wanted to hear? 

You went to his Facebook page and checked his relationship status, one of the upsides to being with an older man meaning that his social media presence was pretty limited. He was still listed as in a relationship with Carla, a woman he’d met in much the same way he’d met you. The thought made your stomach churn, that you’d been so easily replaced by the younger, thinner, prettier version who had been dropped on his desk, practically gift wrapped. 

You went back to the texts. 

How’s Carla? 

There was a longer pause that time. 

She’s not you. 

“Jesus,” you said, setting the phone down and closing your eyes for a moment. You tried to think, forcing yourself to be practical. This wasn’t the time or the place to be having this conversation. You couldn’t have this conversation, not when you’d just been sitting her wondering if you could do the only thing you’d ever felt like you were supposed to do without his help. 

I don’t want to talk about this now. I’m in the middle of working on my book. Maybe another time. 

You stared at the phone, waiting for him to respond. He never did. 

“Yeah, sure seems like you missed me,” you muttered, finishing your salad and cleaning up from lunch, settling back in at your desk to write for the afternoon, trying not to think about the very real possibility that your writing career had ended when your marriage did. 

“I’m losing my mind over here,” you said, breaking down and calling Joel on day five. “There’s only so much I can say to a wall, you know.” 

“We’re comin’ your way tomorrow,” he said. “Be praying for some peace and quiet once Sarah and Tommy are there, trust me. Still like pecan praline ice cream, yeah?” 

“Blue Bell?” You asked. 

“Course it’s Blue Bell,” you could hear him roll his eyes through the phone. “What kind of animal you take me for?” 

“Oh, my apologies…” 

“Anything else you can think of?” He asked. “I can always stop on the way, too, but it’s easier while I’m here.” 

“I still think it’s silly to buy ice cream an hour away and then drive it out here,” you said. 

“That’s what coolers are for,” he replied. “Stop finding shit to worry about. Just give the writing one more shot, see how far you get. Who knows, you might surprise yourself.” 

“Yeah,” you sighed, chewing on the inside of your cheek as you remembered your texts with Gale the day before. 

“Goldie,” Joel said, tone serious. “That all that’s on your mind?” 

“Stop trying to read my thoughts,” you said. 

“Tell me,” he said. “Or I’ll show up early and make you.” 

“That a threat?” 

“That’s a promise,” he said. “What’s goin’ on?” 

“Gale texted yesterday,” you said, fidgeting with the handle of your coffee mug, the coffee itself going cold an hour ago. 

“Gale?” Joel asked, tone sharp. “Fuckin’ Gale? The fuck did he want?” 

“I don’t know,” you sighed. “I’ll show you the texts when you get here, maybe you can translate them for me since he’s not making any damn sense.” 

“That asshole better not be making any trouble,” Joel said. “I will find him and kick his ass, Goldie, just say the word…” 

“I know you will,” you laughed a little. “But don’t worry about it right now. And I should let you go…” 

“Yeah, go write your book,” he teased. “Change the world and shit.” 

There was a knock at your front door and you frowned, staring at it. There was a window to the side of it but all you could see was a shadow. 

“Hey, Joel?” You said. “Hang on one second, there’s someone at my door.” 

“What?” He sounded serious now. “Were you expecting anyone?” 

“No,” you said quietly, approaching it slowly and trying to see through the frosted glass. You couldn’t make out who it was. “So just stay on the line and make sure I’m not axe murdered…” 

“Need me to come out there now?” He asked. “If you ain’t safe…” 

“I’m sure it’s fine,” you said, unlocking the deadbolt. “Probably just a neighbor, but…” 

You opened the door and peered out through the crack, phone clutched against your head. 

You still almost dropped it. 

“Hey Doll.” 

***

“Hi Gale.” 

Joel’s heart dropped. 

“Gale?” He said, pressing his phone tight against his head and trying not to yell in the middle of the line at the HEB. “Fucking Gale? He’s there?” 

“I have to go,” you said quickly. “Talk later.” 

You hung up before he had a chance to say goodbye. He tried calling you back but you ignored it. 

Joel stood there, staring at his cart for a moment, his head swimming. 

Was he freaking out because it was you and he didn’t want you alone at some romantic looking cabin with your ex-husband? Was it because he knew that you weren’t in a place to handle this right now? Was it because he knew - knew - that your ex was a goddamn predator? 

He’d bitten his tongue about that fact since you’d been back, that the man you’d married had been more than twice your age and you’d only been a legal adult for all of a month when he’d met you. It didn’t matter that it was you, that Joel had gone searching for you and found you there with him all those years ago, he’d want to beat the shit out of a man like that regardless of who it was. A man like that couldn’t be trusted. 

He especially couldn’t be trusted with you. 

Joel checked out as fast as he could, calling Tommy as he drove. 

“Hey, need you to do me a favor,” he said quickly. 

“You always need me to do you a favor,” Tommy said. “One of these days I’m gonna cash in.” 

“Yeah, who got you the only job besides the army you’ve kept longer than a week?” Joel asked. 

Tommy sighed. 

“Fine. What’s up?” 

“Need you to take Sarah tonight.” 

“Joel, come on!” 

“M’serious,” Joel said. “Goldie’s ex just showed up at the fucking cabin…” 

“Oh, not that fucking asshole from the funeral,” Tommy cut him off. 

“That’s the one,” Joel said. 

“Fuck that guy,” Tommy said. “He needs to stay the fuck away from her.” 

“Yeah, somethin’ tells me he ain’t gonna make that choice on his own,” Joel said. “So I need you to pick up Sarah and take her for the night. And bring me my shit tomorrow. I’ll text you the address where Sarah’s at, she’s at her friend’s playing right now, needs to be picked up about five…” 

“Yeah, I got it,” Tommy said. “Go save the day.” 

Joel drove as fast as he dared, not familiar enough with where cops liked to hide to go too fast. He pulled up in front of the cabin you’d sent him the information for a week and a half earlier. He’d have admired it, in another circumstance. He’d always wanted a place like this, someplace quiet where there was enough space to live a little, maybe hunt. A place where Sarah could run and play and get to know nature a little. 

But in that moment, he was too pissed to take it in. 

He grabbed a bag out of the trunk - pretense more than anything else - and stalked up to the door before knocking on it, his fist coming down in heavy thuds on the wood. 

You pulled open the door, a surprised look on your face and your ex-husband at your back. 

He looked just about the same as Joel remembered him from before. Tall but not as tall as him, a refined air about him that made Joel want to deck him, a smug look on his face. His hair was gray and his face was wrinkled and Joel fucking hated him. 

“Joel,” you said, staring at him. “What are you…” 

Joel did the only thing he could think to do, fucking Brad standing so close to you with a hand between your shoulder blades like he fucking owned you. 

“Missed you too much, baby,” he said, watching your eyes go a little wide at the word. “Couldn’t wait until tomorrow.” 

He reached out and cupped the hinge of your jaw, his fingers wrapping around the back of your neck and he tugged you closer, his heart beating so fast he was sure that your fucking ex could hear it. 

But he didn’t care. 

All he cared about was the way your lips felt on his when he kissed you. 

Next Chapter

A/N: I mean we can all agree, fuck Brad/Gale.

But also... his presence does get results.

THANKS FOR PUTTING UP WITH ME! Love you!

[makuzume]

Ey- I saw how much Angst you have in this crib. So I'm here to request a Crack request, It's time for you to finally got out from the darkness ✨✨✨

Can I request Neuvilette, Tighnari, Zhongli and Cyno With an S/o that doesn't like vegetables, but don't like to waste food, so they would just pick it off and put it on the character plate/or give it to them.

Totally not talking about me whenever my family eat out I give the veggie to my mom lol

Also You can write this in Headcanons, no need to make it super long, this is just crack fun request idea :))

Genshin Men with an S/O That Doesn't Like Vegetables

🔅characters: Tighnari, Neuvilette, Cyno, Zhongli, Wanderer

🔅content: gn!reader; implied relationship; light

🔅a/n: I've lived too long in the darkness to remove the angst from my blood but I appreciate it chuu <3 Also, it was physically impossible for me to not write this in paragraphs but this was the best I could do to shorten them ;)

[Genshin Masterlist]

🔅Tighnari🔅

"No y/n. It's important to have a well balanced diet in your meal plan." Tighnari said with an eyebrow raised, watching you intensely stare at the plate in front of you.

You lightly poke at the small pile of vegetables that have been left untouched ever since it was served; The small shreds of leaves, string beans, carrots, brocoli, and squash already forming an unpleasant taste in your mind, causing you to form a displeased expression on your face.

Looking at Tighnari, you put on your biggest pout, hoping that he would take pity on you this time. "...I ate my mashed potatoes...??" You tried to defend yourself.

"That may be a vegetable, but that's more on carbs. That doesn't count. You barely even touched the stir-fry I made."

You could only whine, further vocalizing your disagreement. Tighnari looked at you in silence, his expression clearly unphased at your protests.

For a quick moment, you surprised him when he saw you scooping some vegetables on your fork. His eyes widened slightly, feeling a bit proud of you.

He kept quiet, afraid to make any distractions and make you suddenly change your mind from taking a bite.

But his moment of relief quickly turned into immediate disappointment as soon as he saw you place it down on his plate instead.

He sighed heavily.

Tighnari's plate was already completely empty, but it looked like he had no intentions on leaving the dinner table anytime soon. "y/n, we're not leaving until you finish your food." he softly scolded, just like how a parent would when they made their child eat their vegetables. But even Collei, who is a also a child, never had any trouble finishing whatever meal she was served, opposed to you who refused to even try your veggies.

"People in the city aren't as fortunate to be able to taste such rich vitamins with these vegetables from the forest, which are the freshests within Sumeru, might I add. Many people would have finished their plate by now if they were you."

You did feel a little bad, he cooked it afterall. But he was already well aware that you weren't one to eat vegetables in the first place, so a part of you felt like you had the right to object.

"But-" you started, but you were cut off before you could even finish.

"No 'buts.' Have a taste, I tried to make it taste a bit more savory since I know you're not much of a fan of vegetables." he said, crossing his arms with a strict, but patient look "You can do it. It's just a few bites."

Just seeing the way Tighnari kept his gaze so fixated on you, it felt like there was no turning back now. You didn't dare to even try to run away, knowing this will cause an ear full of lectures for you in the near future.

Reluctantly, you pick up your fork and poke whichever looked like the smallest piece.

You take one final look at Tighnari, hoping he changed his mind and let you off the hook this time. "Go on, y/n. Have a bite"

You sighed in defeat, accepting the fate which Tighnari had set on you.

Taking a bite, you were prepared for a bitter tasting flavor to greet your tongue, but surprisingly, the longer you chewed, you slowly pick up a savory kind of taste, just like how Tighnari mentioned.

It surprisingly tasted good, like the beef you just ate in your dish, but munching on the texture of the vegetables still made a bit of a strange sensation in your mouth. Overall though, it was not as bad as you thought.

"It's kind of tasty... It doesn't taste like plant and twigs like I thought."

He raised an eyebrow once more "Of course it is. You're not eating uncooked vegetables, y/n. That's how vegetables are supposed to taste like when seasoned well enough."

Tighnari watched you slowly eat all that was leff of your plate, smiling at you once you finished. "See, was that so hard?"

You smiled back at him, feeling rather proud of your little accomplishment. "Can we have steak for dinner?" Immediately, you requested as if would be the reward you gain from eating just a cup of vegetables.

Tighnari smiled. "Tonight, we're having braised artichokes with tomato coulis."

You expressed your stubborness one more, whining in denial.

He could only chuckle as he stood up, taking both your plates with him, shaking his head endearingly.

...

🔅Neuvilette🔅

"...Is there a problem...? You've barely touched your side dish." Neuvilette said, his eyebrows slightly scrunched up with concern. "Are the vegetables they served you not appetizing...?"

The both of you were already near done with your meal, yet the bowl of vegetables beside your plate remained unnoticed. You looked up at him and gently shook your head "Oh, no, it's nothing. It's just that I don't really like eating veggies all that much in general."

Rather than seeing him have a more relieved expression, the small pout on his lips remained. "My apologies... I did not know that. I ordered it on behalf of you afterall... Please, feel free to order another side dish that you'd like. Or perhaps a dessert that you're interested in trying."

Neuvilette said with a slightly panicked tone. His soft and worried nature was something you wouldn't have had expected the first time you met him. It was rather endearing seeing someone as intimidating as the Iudex of Fontaine act so gentle in front of you.

Seeing his worried expression, you couldn't help but find it adorable how he got overly worked up over a side dish.

You chuckle softly "Neuvy, relax... It's okay. It's not a big deal." you smile warmly to reassure him.

You reach for the small serving of greens and place it down in front of him. "Here, you can eat it if you want, I won't finish it."

Neuvilette looked at you, still a bit uncertain. "Well, alright... If you insist... Are you sure you won't mind?"

You nod, smiling. "Yup."

He carefully grabbed the small bowl of vegetables in front of him, his concerned expression from earlier already begadn to fade.

Suddenly, an idea comes to your mind. "You know what...? Some dessert right now actually sounds kind of nice, now that you mentioned it." Raising your hand up in the air, you politely called over one of the server's attention. Soon, ohe came over to your table with a pen and paper in hand, ready for your order.

"I'll have a slice of chocolate cake for dessert, and he'll have... a cup of shaved ice. And please make sure you use fresh water instead of tap water... Oh- with a spoon of sweet syrup on top too...?" You look at him with a smile, waiting for some form of confirmation from Neuvilette regarding his dessert. The waiter could only take down notes with a mildly confused reaction from the unsual request.

He nodded slowly, a gentle exhale escaping his soft lips which formed a warm smile. "You know me very well, my little ocean pearl."

...

🔅Cyno🔅

Looking up from the meal in front of him, Cyno saw you casually place down a spoon full of veggies onto his plate.

He slightly furrowed his brows. "y/n, why are you giving me your vegetables..?" Cyno asked, mildy confused as you continued give him a few more scoops of the salad.

"I don't want it... so... you can have it..!"

He stopped his chewing, processing the chrrent situation at hand. "But... I don't want to eat it either... It was just a part of the dish I ordered. I was actually going to give it to you as well..."

You paused in the middle of handing him another batch of greens... realizing the tension that had now formed in the atmosphere.

Both of you stared at each other in silence.

Looking over to his plate, you noticed how everything else had been nearly finished... all except his vegetables.

"But it would be a waste to just leave it.. don't you think...?" You tried to persuade him, to which he replied "... which is exactly why you should eat your serving instead of giving it to me."

You put down your utensils, realizing the current issue: both of you didn't want to eat the salad.

"But... I don't eat vegetables at all... I know you eat them sometimes..!" You protested lightly, feeling a little reluctant to waste the few shreds of cabbages and carrots.

"True." Cyno responded. "But this salad in particular is rather tasteless. I can't taste anything since they didn't add any other sauce to it... Also, I don't wish for it to go to waste either... They gave us rather a pretty big portion...."

You both looked at each other, a bit dumbfounded on the best possible solution. You were thinking of a good compromise where the two parties involved in this dilema could leave the restaurant peacefully.

Cyno closed his eyes, also devising a good plan to solve the crisis-... just like how he planned various strategies during missions for his work as the General Mahamatra.

"Since both of us don't want to eat it... " Cyno started, his voice turning serious.

You lean forward, eager to listen to his suggestion.

"...Why don't we duel for it? Loser eats the vegetables."

"....."

"....."

(Narrator: ....)

"...I AM NOT PLAYING TCG AGAINST YOU!" You objected, immediately placing both your hands on the table. "No way am I going to win against YOU."

He takes a deep sigh as his offer got rejected, becoming completely clueless once more. "Well, I'm all out of options."

"Really? That's your best AND only idea..?" You sigh with a raised eyebrow, wondering how this man in front of you is the same man who is known to be one of the smartest and strongest men among the soldiers of Sumeru. "Let's just get it packed up and ask Tighnari to make stir fry salad."

Cyno thinks for a moment, his head low and his hand resting on his chin. "Hm... that's actually a good plan... At least Tighnari would be able to put some actual flavor to it."

You smile, playfully rolling your eyes at him.

...

🔅Zhongli🔅

"Hm..." Zhongli hummed curiously, watching you from across the table as you took another bite from your plate. "...You do not like the vegetables in your dish?"

You paused, a bit embarassed that he noticed. "Yeah... I'm not really that fond of eating them..."

You sigh.

After putting down the fork onto the table, you look up at him, assuming that you were about to hear more about the benefits of a 'healthy meal plan' from Zhongli and what not. You rest your arms onto the table and listen intently.

"Eating vegetables is good for you. They are also quite delectable when seasoned right... I believe that it is good to give it a chance to prove itself to you...? You should try it, my dearest." He said with his signature enthusiastic but gentle voice.

After making a small chuckle, you gave him a nod of acknowledgement. "I know I know... But still, I just really don't like eating them, that's all." You shrugged casually.

"I see..." Zhongli started "Then you can transfer them onto my plate, if you'd like. It would be best to not waste such perfectly good food like so."

You smiled, a bit relieved to hear him be so willing as to take the veggies off of your hands.

You eagerly picked up your fork once more, scooping them up and gently placing it in Zhongli's plate several times until all the vegetables in your dish have completely disappeared.

He pokes at one of the slices of squash and eats it, and instantly, his face brightens up. "Mh. It tastes delicious."

"Oh, really?" you responded. "It's good that you like it then."

Zhongli takes another bite. "Hmm, yes. Perfectly well seasoned indeed... We should order a platter the next time we return with our fellow friends."

For a moment, you went silent, your eyes slightly squinting at the realization. "...You're not trying to convince me to taste of the vegetables... are you..?"

Zhongli closesd his eyes as he eats another piece, unable to give you a response. His smile shined brightly as he continued to chew on the slices of colorful cubes, acting as if he were too focused on his meal to have paid attention to his surroundings.

You sigh, aware of his intentions. "...ugh... fine..." You said in defeat.

"I'll taste it...."

He opened his eyes, suddenly being able to hear you now. "Ah, you are interested to take a bite, I see?"

You could only smile as Zhongli glady pokes a small piece of brocoli for you and carefully brought it over to your mouth. "Just this one, okay??"

He chuckled handsomely softly. "Here, have a taste, my dearest. I'm sure you will find it delicious."

...

🔅Wanderer🔅

His eyes remained closed, enjoying gentle blow of the breeze as it hit his porcelain skin.

The two of you sat on a log which faced a view of the tall forest trees, having a nice little picnic as you enjoyed the clear sunny sky above.

Nahida had recently got interested in cooking with a few scholars she made friends with, so whenever she practicesd making a new dish, she always packed two lunch boxes for the two of you to eat during your dates.

"...And just what do you think you're doing?" Wanderer said with an eyebrow slightly raised, his one eye opening to get a good look at you from his peripheral vision.

Busted.

You were caught red handed as you were in the middle of transfering some of the seasoned brocoli onto his empty box. "...I'm kind of full.." you quietly defended.

He scoffed softly. "You lie very well." With his arms crossed, he turned his head towards you, observing your reactions. "You also mentioned that you wanted to get some waffles after lunch too."

With your head hanging low, you slowly put the brocoli back in your lunch box. "..fine... I didn't wanna eat the brocoli... okay..?" You confessed shyly.

He sighed calmly, and you sensed a short lecture was ahead of you.

"Lesser Lord Kusanali had personally cooked this for us. Though I don't mind eating the vegetables for you on other occasions, but she made this for you." he softly scolded.

Though his actions and words sounded rather harsh, his tone was gentle. From how you knew him, even though there was always a hint of sarcasm and mild irritation in his voice, you knew it still came from a place of tenderness.

You lowered your head in shame. You did feel guilty since Nahida did put in the effort to cook it for you. She also seemed rather excited whenever she prepare the snacks for you whenever the two of you would set out for a date.

"Now. Go ahead, finish your meal. Unless you want me to spoon feed it to you like a baby." He said with a slightly strict but soft tone.

You look up at him, a smile slowly forming on your lips. "Well... I technically AM your baby... right, baby?" You teased jokingly, hoping to have a bit of a light and playful moment with him.

His reaction was rather shocked. He was taken aback from the new pet name, especially since it was one he didn't see himself being called such a term apart from the other sweet names you've already been using.

His lips tightly closed and his eyebrows scrunched up, turning his head to face the forest once more, visibly affected by your choice of words. "...Trying to flirt with me- It isn't going to work. You shouldn't waste perfectly good food." Wanderer said, his voice mildly irritated but his eyes expressed embarassment.

Playfully, you hung your head in defeat, finally giving in. "Alright, but only if you still feed it to me. I'll finish all of if if you do that..., deal?"

He closed his eyes and took a deep sigh. "Fine..." and finally turned his head again to face you. "If that's what makes you finish it."

...

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a/n: It's back to writing for Genshin aaaaaa🗣️ ‼️I missed this <3 thank archons this has finally graduated from my drafts >:'D FEW MORE DRAFTS LET'S GOOO CHAT

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