#didn't go to plan but it's ok
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I am not a fish: Introduction
"Looking at their work I would be expecting 8s or 9s"
My biology teacher said that when I was in year nine. It was not the first time someone had said something to that effect, and it was not the last.
The fact of the matter is that I spent most of my time, up until year 11, being told how far I would go, how high my grades were expected to be and how I could do anything that I wanted. People have said that, I just about nudged into the gifted category(though that is a nuanced discussion for another time), not like some of my friends who passed everything with their eyes closed, I definitely had to work, but I was honestly doing well.
My first set of mock GCSEs in year eleven came back and I was broken. Not one of my grades was above a six. This continued through year 11, I was not living up to the expectations that were set. This all came to a head on results day when I discovered that I had only just scraped a 6 which was not enough to do maths A-level, and without maths, I couldn't do physics. This was an issue. I want to be an astrophysicist, however, I have always been in a complex "situationship" with maths, and honestly, I think we might need couple's counselling, but I'm stretching this metaphor too far so suffice to say, I was not too proud of my performance.
So here I am, the day before my first day of college and getting set to do Biology, Environmental science, and Geology. And I will be the first to admit, I am still bitter, I am still upset, I am not over it, but if I could do all the subjects I wanted too, they would be next on my list after physics and maths. The idea is that I will retake my maths GCSE and then go back after college to do physics and maths, so really, in essence I am just taking the scenic route, and maybe, I will end up somewhere wonderful that I could never have dreamed of.
take it easy and good luck to everyone starting this new year
written: 03/09/2024
posted: 03/09/2024
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sillyfudgemonkeys · 7 months ago
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redeliminator · 7 months ago
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i believe that to some extent Andre knows he's fucked up and this headcanon is one of the hills I will die on in the farewell tape, Cal says that “you can’t cure somebody who has nothing wrong with them.” 
Andre, on the other hand, admits they might be seen as hypocrites. he's not gonna back out, he still thinks it's the right thing for him to do, but he seems to acknowledge that people will not perceive it the same way. he tries to explain that no matter what it’ll look like, it’s not murder for the sake of murder - not in his eyes at least. there's a (sick and twisted) lesson hidden in this tragedy.
to some extent, Andre is aware of what’s going on with him, what exactly shaped him into who he is now. he sees the cause and effect of being bullied, of feeling rejected and alienated, and not being able to do anything about it because that's just who he is. he can kick and scream and shout but he will never change who he is at his core and this realization is crushing for a 17/18-year-old. this and all the implications of a missing sense of belonging.
he knows he’s messed up. he knows what would fix him and he’s convinced it’s out of his reach. he looks at other students and he thinks: it’ll never be me. and he's angry that they have something he will never have.
his awareness doesn't help though. if anything, it fuels his frustration. what adults know to be a temporary problem (high school) seemed like an insurmountable obstacle, the end of everything.
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groovyfrog420 · 10 months ago
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Sweet Dream & Bitter Nightmare
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Based on Pure Vanilla's China-exclusive costume; it's only fair that his counterpart gets a matching one too!
design details under the cut
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ugly lil sketch. throw him at the wall
PV has bear elements, so SM has a jester hat shaped more like bunny ears. Pajama/onesie and slippers because of the dreamy theme. Strawberry (because Pure Vanilla has a cherry) & hair shaped like whipped cream to with the dessert motifs. Pure Vanilla's staff in this skin looks kiiiinda like a spoon, so I gave Shadow Milk an answering fork!
I actually have no idea what Pure Vanilla's costume is even named, but if anyone does play/understand the Chinese version & would like to share, then I'd love to learn more about it! This was mostly just guessing work and going off of the themes and vibes lol
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daily-odile · 1 year ago
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if it has not been suggested already and you are okay with drawing it-- maybe Odile teaching Bonnie how to make onigiri??
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the duo ever!!
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runawaymarbles · 5 months ago
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There's a lot to be said about flaws in the US education system but I think some of you just weren't paying attention in class
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vcrnons · 1 year ago
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my radiant beam in the night / i don't need no light to see you.
carat revival '24 ↳ create content that revolves around your bias/es in seventeen OR a flipped prompt about which member/s you could take in a fight ⚔️
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thatonecrookedsmile · 10 months ago
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I would say that, considering his history, he's not that wrong, but even I have doubts as to whether that would be right. But at the end of the day, this is just a joke that's been in my head for a while, sooooo…eh.
Oh hey, an attempt at a comic? Made by me? That I didn't give up during the process or lost all motivation? What was my only attempt at this, 2019? Damn, it's been a long time.
I thought about leaving this here without editing or any colors, just the natural ones from the paper and pencil. But something in my head said "HAHAHA, no" so I went back to work. I had to put this idea down on paper this time (literally). If another year passes without me being able to execute this idea, I would lose my mind.
This scenario was inspired by this video by Jehtt, inspired by the original meme by Windii. Credits to both of them.
For a long time I wanted to joke - especially on the anniversary - that I wanted Sammy to only have less than 5 seconds in the next game (or in other words, take his screen time in DR, and shorten it even more). You know, just for the funnies (unless..?) But,thanks to the news released at the beginning of January this year about The Cage, I legally can't do this joke anymore…this year. Don't worry, after that comes out (and finally gives Sam the screen time he wants,hopefully) and we start to crawl into the Bendy 3 production era, I'll make this joke when I can.
Anyway, happy birthday Sammy Lawrence. You may not be my favorite character in this franchise, but there are some things I can actually appreciate about you. Plus, you made me laugh a few moments before (you know what I'm talking about) so there's that.
And happy 7 years to Chapter 2, and by extension, Susie, Norman, Alice, the Searchers, (Johnny????), and Beta Ink Bendy. (I would mention Jack too, but he was only introduced with the release of CH4, so technically it's not his birthday yet, but I'll consider him here).
And now? May I be able to do something for CH4's anniversary. Wish me luck,cus I'll need it.
(it might be really late now, but it's still the 18th where I live, so it's still his birthday, so I still won)
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insane-in-the-membranee · 3 months ago
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Some rom-coms that I've come to enjoy 💞💕💗
Any more recommendations?
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seafoamsol · 4 months ago
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Process gif for the [ last piece ]! It was a bit of a rough ride.
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a-story-teller · 2 months ago
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Watched Carrie for the first time and I am fully a Carrie stan. A Carrie apologist. She did nothing wrong actually
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telesodalite · 1 month ago
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[Train ride :D!]
[Background-less version below]
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#this one fought me some. ngl. was aiming for 'soft and fuzzy feeling' but i think i ended up in muddy territory again :/#but i'm happy with it i think. it wasn't meant to be complicated. but just for funnsies. rushed headache filled funnsies. but still fun :]#idw scavengers#misfire#crankcase#fulcrum#tf idw#humanformers#transformers au#maccadam#i need a name for this au maybe? at least. if i plan on drawing more of it :/#gonna think on it ig#they went shopping tho :D. getting some late gifts and stuff ig. idk. holiday vibes tho.#the giant dino plush is for their version of connie. which i haven't decided if it'd be canon-like or more 'son boy allowed'#its also for misfire honestly. she's kinda attached to it now#also if fulcrum looks drunk. its because she is. a little bit. on love and good cheer <3 just kidding. it's probably eggnog or smth#crankcase didn't want to take the train. she has a perfectly mostly functional blue jeep that she has a hate/love relationship with#she got out voted tho. for the vibes#misfire is sleepy bcs train motion is like the ultimate sleep inducing thing i swear to god. as soon as it starts its all. honk. mimimimimi#also also. forgot to mention this the last time i drew fem!misfire. the reason her sweater is kinda rough is because she fidgets with it#its uh. its well loved. and a little chewed on. and stained. and probably not the cleanest. but its her's <3#krok and spin are homebodies ig. so the gifts are for them. also i had meant to make one of the gifts blue for nickel. but i forgor :|#ok. i gots to go. dinner calls. but <33333#my art
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rowenabean · 14 days ago
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#didn't have a big party for my 30th for reasons that were partly distance and partly insecurities/depression#this year being back closer to where my people are decided to do a big party instead this weekend#my first since my 21st (which was... a struggle for also distance related reasons and may have reinforced said insecurities)#i am having to remind myself. i am doing my best none of us get to practice this life#interrupting this to say i just mindlessly slapped at a tickle on my arm only to discover it was HUGE#not the sandflies we've been getting all day but a moth or something at least a cm big! (i grabbed it and threw it away without looking)#anyway. what was i saying. having a little moment where my insecurities are coming back in the middle of the night#and i wonder if i have - again - asked for less than i truly want because i didn't feel like anyone would give the full thing to me#but the point is: i asked for something i wanted and that's something that takes practice. and the point is: i get to try again next year a#d next year and next year. and the point is: we only live this life once but it is not a short life and there will be more chances#to celebrate with the people i love. to ask for what i want. to learn to listen to what i actually want before i make myself smaller out#of habit#but i DID ask for a party and i DID ask for someone who isn't me to host it (a thing i haven't asked for since probably my 21st tbh) and#that's already growth#and it will be fun! i'm a bit sad that no one from my most recent chapter of life can be there but it's no secret that social was hard ther#so i only have 3 friends i wanted to invite anyway and all of them live several hours away#(and one of them i knew couldn't come already when i planned it - she's at a hens party - but we talked about it and decided to go ahead)#idk. really it's ok. but part of why i'm doing this is as a challenge to my own insecurities (as well as because it will be fun!) and i#really pray this year will see some of those insecurities dwindling. that i will be able to really believe that i am lovable and loved.#that's my prayer.
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corallapis · 1 year ago
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grahamcarmen · 2 days ago
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knizuu · 1 month ago
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Oh yea, the dream
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