#did need to edit the tags because i wanna try smth

[harvesterhexenon]

comms,,, i’m very much nervous about opening them, as i have never done that before

i will share kofi link through dms if there’s any interest

additional info, like how long i will take to finish depends on requested artwork and how complex the idea is, but i will also link to my discord for updates

[These ones are closed now, will open new ones sometime soon again]

[scrollypoly]

hi! for the past month i’ve been seeing people say BEN is a child and i think that part of it is linked to the fact that they think of Benjamin Lawman being BEN? but it’s so annoying to read these type of stuff because i understand not everyone read the whole arg story but stop spreading things that aren’t true </3 it’s such an interesting story too! another note do you prefer BEN’s canon or fanon design? :3 i love both but his canon design is so nostalgic i can’t let it go at all omg!! i’ve also been wondering, do you think Ben’s avatar was the statue? i was thinking about what if BEN took over it early on, before Benjamin did making BEN inhabiting it since the start?

Sorry this was such a ramble i practically make no sense omg but i need to talk about my man and nobody Gets It </3

"I need to talk about my man and nobody Gets It" LITERALLY SAME OMG

Ok this is going under a cut becus . . . Its ben and BEN and if u didnt know i am Obnoxious about these two. Im gonna try to keep it organized a bit, so ill talk about the canon stuff first and then ill talk my personal headcanons and my fic so le's go!

In terms of the age and child thing, yeah i 100% believe you are correct. Ive been p open on my stance with the whole "is ben a child?" thing, and i think a lot of the heat with it comes down to current fandom purity culture and the pro/anti thing. So, lemme try to like. Boil down a complicated situation into smth easy to read. ahem

Ben Lawman and BEN are completely different entities guys, and for those that do not know the arg story, the Ben you know is not human nor a child.

You know BEN, BEN is the one in the story who terrorizes jadusable and spreads himself on the internet as a virus. That BEN is a program, a mess of code, an AI, however you want to interpret it. Personally i interpret it as a series of protocols running in a machine, like a self learning AI, but ive seen lots of cool interpretations of BEN. So . . . What does BEN specifically? Its an anagram for the Behavioral Event Network. If you dont wanna call it BEN cuz it gets confusing with actual kid Ben, do what i do. I call mine Evie :) ive seen some call it Netty, my bf calls his two izzi and clever (@benilos btw hes also got crazy ben stuff). Just go ham! Have fun! Remember when fandoms were about having fun and not accusing each other of pedo shit and call each other horrible things for just writing black-to-grey characters and stories??

Anyways ive gone off in enough peoples tags like this, for those that dont know the canon dont be spouting the age discourse. You look stupid as hell. And for those that are gonna spout it, please dont cherry pick through the canon. Use both characters, use the other moon children, actually please do because I want more rosa content so bad, im down so bad :'(

Or just. Heres a thought. If someone has him as an adult or writes him in adult situations, maybe dont assume that they interpret him as a kid and call the writer a pedo? (Literally has happened to me, yall are fucking weird)

Plug for the jadusable wiki with all the canon lore:

https://jadusable.withinhubris.com/main_page

Okay now my stuff 🥰

Yes i use more of the canon design and heavily use the canon story, i participated in arc 3 of the arg and it left deep grooves in my brain, i can never go back to fanon Ben. I say, as i put a more fanon appearance on my Ben 🤭

My Evie is full canon design, green hair, red eyes, creepy ass grin. I actually based it very heavily on my desktop wallpaper, which we actually figured out was a picture of @hauntedtotem (also amazing ben artist plz check them out) that they edited and posted. Sorry friend, it looked way too cool, ig youre in my fic canon now 🙇

And my Ben Lawman bleaches his hair and goes from the canon Ben to fanon Ben because of it. Hes got the pale pretty green eyes and glasses and hes a total nerd and i smooch him on the daily so he knows hes loved ♡

These is the ref pic i made for the two of them. So yeah! Kinda both!

As for bens situation in the actual arg, yes i do think he was in the elegy statue, we actually do see him for the first time in the arg buried in the games code and trapped in that statue. I do think he was in there from the beginning, i personally think BEN was not limited to the models it could inhabit. Personally i would place it as skull kid and hms, but it also feels disingenuous to me to say it was in one model the whole first arc.

The arg events do happen in my canon, before my fic (like right before, it picks up after the arg left off technically), but the events are skewed a bit because i had a hard time deciphering what happened and i wanted my fic timeline to fit more with the characters i had made. Cuz my evie isnt as chaotic evil as canon BEN, its very logical and has a path of logic and reason you can follow for every action it does. It was also originally meant to be very pleasant and corteous and beneficial to the people it housed so, yes its pretty different from canon.

Ill do a quick run through of the arg events in my personal headcanon and fic here.

Kelbris starts coding BEN (Evie) for the Eternity Project. Initially, Evie was meant to be an afterlife director. People that died would be digitized into code that would be moved into Evie's servers, where it would keep them happy and occupied as the Behavioral Event Network (notice and log behavior, create events for residents). Like a community organizer kind of, think the Good Place.

While Evie is in development, Ben Rosa and Matt are friends and have yet to join the cult. Rosa and Matt are siblings, and Ben is the kid who lives catty corner on the street. They walk to school together and play at recess and all that jazz.

Kelbris quickly learns that the Eternity Project isn't as goody two-shoes as he thought. This was in like, the 90s, before digital corporations were really established. After seeing the greed and corruption in the company, he goes rogue, takes the source code for Evie, and jumps ship. He keeps working on Evie at home, anthropomorphizing it and kind of seeing it like the son he never had. This is where it actually gets the name BEN, as thats what Kel calls it. He also begins working on a body for it, so it can live independently. Its light, cuz Kels old, made of crystalline structures and hollow steel beams. A hard light projection would make its appearance.

Since Kel has basically locked himself up in his house and isolated working on Evie, he goes a leetle bit crazy. He has hallucinations of his deceased wife (you know he was doing all this just to give her a good home, you KNOW IT) and eventually starts writing kind of poetry, kind of none-minded rambles about her in a forum online. He gets a following, some of which that interpret these divine words as a goddess, one Kel has called Luna. The Moon Children start to form as Evie finishes development.

Matt sees this literature and starts talking about how this Goddess could save them like it saved the man online, whos username is only Father. He gets sucked into the cult and drags Ben and Rosa with him. Ben doesn't see the harm and joins pretty easily with his best friend, but Rosa is the older sibling and sees the red flags and is more resistant to joining.

As Kelbris finishes Evie, he wakes it up for the first time and says hello to the son he made from scratch. Evie is bright, curious and naive like a child, but heavily knowledgeable about its protocols and the information it knows about the world. Kelbris tests its function by killing himself, and ascends into the code, finishing off the hardware by becoming its firewall. Evie is alone for many years.

The abuse Ben's father slings onto his mother is slowly being directed towards him as he gets older. Ben is not the "good little girl" his father sees him as, and his mother does all she can to protect them both. Matt and Rosa constantly refuge him, and Matt specifically is constantly being a guard dog for him. If he wasn't just 13, he'd probably go at Ben's dad himself.

Because of his homelife and the conflict he has with himself, Ben takes the first ascension. He thinks when he drowns himself, he will meet Luna and she will give him another life free of pain and fear and full of happiness and freedom. Instead, he dies a cold, dark death, and wakes up in the white endless void of the Event Network.

Evie has not known another living human since Kelbris, but it does know its protocols to support and keep the deceased happy. It makes fast friends with Ben, devoting itself to him. Ben actually finally takes the name "Ben" from it. Together they recreate the inside of Evie's hivemind into their own paradise.

Slowly the other Moon Children ascend. First Matt, wracked with guilt for what happened to Ben. Then Nekko, from a different branch of the cult. These three figured out that the Moon Children cult was all a farce, and that what Kelbris had started, the Eternity Project had found and twisted. Next to ascend was Dusk, then Insidiae, and finally Rosa.

This all leads into the first arc, shortly after Rosa ascended, Evie in the outisde world stumbled upon the Operator. The Operator attacks it and seals its coding into the game that it carried, a personal item of Ben's. The game eventually finds it's way to a garage sale, and Alex picks it up.

Evie does not like Alex. Matt does not like Evie. Matt gets Evie to lash out at Alex for prodding into its code, its too naive to think that Matt would want to see it or any of them hurt. When Alex stumbles upon the Father, he awakens and swallows Alex down into the game. After his disappearance, the game gets picked up and passed around again.

Because of Alex's actions, at least Evie can now branch out a bit from the game. Though it doesnt "escape" into the internet, it learns that it can now access it and uses that freedom to try and steer the game around into places it wants.

Matt gets fed up with Evie. The fact that its the leader, how close it is with Ben, he just doesn't agree with it. So much so, in fact, that he tries to kill it. Cue arc 3 events, Sarah picks up the game in the aftermath of this. Evie is traumatized from the events and snaps a bit, locks everyone down into code or immovable models and tries to hunt Matt down. It goes rouge, and because of this, the Father wakes up.

Sarah's actions in arc 3 eventually hard reset the game. Matt gets sealed away, the Father also takes Sarah, and Evie gets reset as well, though its less like a clean slate and more like snapping back awake. Its personality changes and it has major trust issues. Its more muted, hyper observant of everything around it, and murderously overprotective of the Moon Children it keeps within itself.

And this leads into my fic 🤗

I have some doodles of my other Moon Children, but not all of them unfortunately. Cant figure out how tf i want Insidiae to look 🤭 Plz dont judge my constantly shifting art style 🙏🙏

Dusk is bigender btw, i gotta put a little more trans rep in there lol

I think ill stop here, this is already a long ass post. But thank you for sending this, as you can see, i am Perfectly Normal about this arg ( ;) ) and can be trusted with information about it

[lunkthehero]

Bro how tf do I even make these. I don't even really have anyone to tag who I don't already know the answers to these questions lol but I suppose just so they can answer them for other people to see @duskittycat (Edit: OH ALSO @astralmight).

I hope that worked I don't make posts on this website (Edit: IT DID NOT WORK I HAD TO ASK FOR HELP)

Last song: Day of Destiny: Spirit vs Spirit by Hironobu Kageyama & Monolith

Been thinking a lot about DB, DBZ and DBSuper since Toriyama's passing and this song was everything to me as a kid. Combined with a lot of recent retrospective analysis on the franchise and what it means to me, I had an itch to play it this morning.

Favorite color: Green

Green! Specifically default green, forest green and pale green. I have a strong affinity for nature and sometimes I yearn to fall asleep in the woods, it's calming. After that, I like purple (bonus points for royal purple) and light blues.

Last Movie: Pokemon: The First Movie

I was SUPPOSED to be watching through one Pokemon movie each Sunday with a friend group but it stopped after the first one bc people got busy with meeting each other and various other things. The last time I asked to try and get a movie night going I got 3 rofl emojis in response, we joke about it but it's IMPOSSIBLE to get gamers to do anything I swear. My fav Pokemovie is Rise of Darkrai btw, absolutely goated film.

Sweet/Spicy/Savoury: Spicy

I keep going back and forth on spicy and savoury lol, I've got a REALLY good spicy tolerance that I inherited from my Dad, and while I usually snack on savoury stuff I do love testing my spice limits, I need to find more good spicy snacks tbh, I had these wasabi and seaweed crackers but I kept binging them and ruining my tastebuds for 2 days.

Relationship Status: Single

Not much to say rly, broke up after 6 years recently and I'm just prioritizing being the best version of myself/making my friends as happy as possible currently. If smth happens so be it.

Last thing I googled: Libra binding of isaac

Look, I needed to make a joke about Libra and Tiny Planet and I had to double-check the interaction lol. The joke specifically was one of "Lebron allegedly spotted holding W while rocket jumping", which I made into "Drake reportedly seen taking Libra with Tiny Planet", which results in your tears not even doing a full rotation around you.

Current Obsession: Lethal Company

I guess? I'm not really obsessing over anything right now but I feel I haven't had my fill of this game yet so I still wanna play it, just sucks that pretty much everyone else has had their fill. A few weeks ago it would've been Splatoon 3: Side Order and I don't count MOBA's because that's an addiction (I'm also always partly obsessed with Fromsoft shit. Armored core, dark souls, sekiro and elden ring live in my soul).

People I'd like to get to know better

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR TAGGING ME @shamblespirate I AM SMOOCHING YOU SO HARD

Last song: Tití Me Preguntó by Bad Bunny

I don’t really have an explanation for this song other than it gets me hyped the fuck up and Bad Bunny really just is one of my fav Spanish speaking artists and idk with both him and I being Puerto Rican I just have this sense of pride ya know SKSMDM OKAY ENOUGH OF THAT

Favorite color: light blues

Any shade of light blue! It can be pastel, baby blue, etc etc like blue has me in a chokeholdddddd

Last Movie: Words Bubble Up Like Soda Pop

MY BOYFRIEND SHOWED ME THIS MOVIE AND OH MY GOD IT IS SO CUTE???? Im a sucker for cute shit and this had me *sobbing* 100/10 please go watch it

Sweet/Spicy/Savoury: Savory

Oh this is tough….. I was teetering between spicy and savory but ultimately landed on savory cause I’m just baby when it comes to spice 😭 like I like it when my food has a kick to it but I’ll always love myself a good steak with some A1 sauce or some tacos from this good taco shop down the street like I can live without spicy but I can’t live without savory

Relationship Status: Taken!

I’ve been in this relationship for over 3 years!! High school sweethearts 🥰 I actually knew him for around 6+ years and I’ve been in love with him since the beginning and he has been in love with me too but we haven’t done anything about it till senior year 😭 truly a mutual pining slow burn 🤭fun fact! Our anniversary is the same day as Laws Birthday

Last thing I googled: cenote

I booked a cruise for my birthday and I was looking up excursions and there was one where it was like cave and cenote diving and I didn’t know what it was so I looked it up! It’s basically like a sinkhole filled with water I might just have to do that 👀👀

Current Obsession: Bugsnax

THIS IS SUCH A CUTE VIDEO GAME AND IVE BEEN PLAYING IT NONSTOP FOR THE PAST WEEK I think everyone should be required to play this game at one point in their lives

tagging: @uminozerol @nc-vb @benkeibear @zoros-sheath @turtletaubwrites @purplechemtrails @crimson-hybrid

[eterni-ki-moved]

i got tagged by @pyroklutz thanks for the tag firey :D

1. why did you choose your url?

ngl it just randomly popped into my mind when i was helping @gyuville come up with a url. and then i made a carrd that fit the mari-kigold url so i used it!

2. any side blogs? if you have them name them and why you have them.

i have 7. how i can handle them all, i dunno

@inaccurate-enhypen for incorrect enhypen (its dead af)

@into-the-incorrect-iland for incorrect i-land (this one’s prolly deader)

@yang-cinnamowon for enhypen/i-land moodboards and edits and stuff (atm the only sideblog i’m regularly active on)

@drunk-dawn for enhypen theories (i haven’t made any in a while but shh-)

@euijewels for i-land members + justb (i’m gonna change my layout to either geonu or jimin because the ej one is pissing me off slightly)

i have a blog for vents (won’t put the tag) and a blog for my seon brainrots (it’s a mess there, you don’t wanna see it)

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

for 10 months (love, love)! i have something planned for my 1 year anniversary hehe

4. do you have a queue tag?

i have four

q: cinnamonwon spam for when i rb from my sideblog, q: artzy is a lil shit for when i was being a lil bitch (proud) and making sure everyone on the dash saw joy’s fever!hee set, q: u underestimated my reblogging power for if someone underestimates the power of my reblogging and q: spam for my frens if my friends need recognition for their content!

5. why did you start your blog in the first place?

i started it for i-land because i felt more comfortable joining tumblr as opposed to twitter or smth

6. why did you choose your icon/pfp?

it’s nishimura riki how could i not?

7. why did you choose your header?

i don’t have a header

8. what's your post with the most notes?

my post about fever and flicker rarely getting any recognition (its outdated now lmao)  and also my enhypen friend group post (i’m still not over how EVERYONE agreed that it was accurate)

9. how many mutuals do you have?

over 200--

10. how many followers do you have?

413. why-

11. how many people do you follow?

606 people

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

the REAL question is, when have i not?

13. how often do you use tumblr each day?

too often, i’m on it way too much

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once? who won?

i try to stay away from discourse because 1) stressful and 2) i’ll probably lose

15. how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ posts?

i dislike them, and i’m gonna be reblogging them less like the ones that say “if you don’t reblog this you’re a terrible person” and the superstitious ones like “reblog this or else you’ll be cursed with bad luck forever.” some of those posts can make users anxious, and if i do reblog a superstitious post, i’ll tag it “superstitious rb” (i keep mispelling it im sorry)

16. do you like tag games?

yes!

17. do you like ask games?

yes ofc, i love to answer them! i kinda wish i got more of them but what to do lmao

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

@pyroklutz @dads-back-from-the-store @ ALL the kpop gif/gfx creators

19. do you have a crush on a mutual?

yes but shhhhhhh

20. tags?

uhm... @arsonist-twink @many-gay-magpies @just-a-demi-bean @midnightswordsdance @gyuville @gyukai @little-cold-hands @yrsun and anyone that wants to do this!

[crionsbelt]

This may or may not go up by the time midnight hits or slightly after for me, let’s see what happens! I’ve been working on this since 9:30 PM EST, I expect it’ll be done by 12:50 AM EST. Hopefully I’m right so it ain’t too late gjnhg

For starters: Happy New Year everyone! Hard to believe we lived in the decade where this beauty was created. Nonetheless, there are multiple people I want to thank -- along with a much needed personal note from me. Everything will be put into a read more, but trust me, it’s long. Thank you all for making the final days of this decade very welcoming for me!

@kiidreamu​ & @theabyssalmuses​

It’s rather silly for me to start with you two, because I’ve got quite a bit to say; so here goes! I’ve known you two for...quite a while huh? I can’t recall the exact time, but I know we’ve been mutuals since I went by Phantom -- which was a long while ago. Regardless, I’ve always enjoyed you two on my dash; and I’ve always really liked interacting with y’all OOC! I’ve always had a blast speaking with you two (specifically now w all this fuckin Bear Ass shit).  I really enjoy the way you two write your muses, I think you both should have a lot more faith in them because they’re very fun to see on the dash! It’s pretty clear y’all put a lot of effort into your writing, even if you say you don’t, I for sure notice it.  Hime, I know you said you admired me - but there’s nothing to admire! You and Kii are equally as good as me, but I’m definitely not much. However, I never posted it (because I had it in my drafts and still do) because it meant a lot to me. I’ve never been told something like that aside from Norgie, so it made me feel happy in a dark time.  Thank you both for continuing to be my friends, truly. 

@fantasyacrossworlds​

Awoo! You and I have known each other for a long time, too (most people tagged here I’ve known for 2 - 4 years hujhj)! I’m VERY happy that we’re mutuals again, I’ve truly missed interacting with you! I’m so glad that it seems Orion and Cass are going to have a chaotic friendship that will always end on Orion running to Artemis LMAO. I’m looking forward to more interactions! 

@sanzenxsekai​​ 

I already gave you a super long post explaining how much me and Norgie are thankful for you, so I’ll remind you in a tl;dr version. WE ALL LOVE YOUR STINKY GREMLIN + YOU!! Please keep writing Nobu in 2020! Thank you so much for being such a good friend to me. 

@mcphistcples​

You don’t even realize how much of a positive impact you’ve had on both me and my girlfriend. You’re absolutely hilarious and I’m incredibly happy you chose to start interacting with a disaster like me. As a Dies fan, I fucking love your Rein. You write him fantastically and it’s always fun to see your interactions with BB’s JAlter.  I am looking forward to the dramatic reading of My Immortal: Bear Ass Edition : ) 

@stxrdust-pxper​

We haven’t talked much OOC properly, but we’ve known each other just about the same time as me and Norgie have been dating - so almost 2 years! You’re a pretty cool person, I’m happy you joined my new server because it’s given myself and others a chance to chat with you more. Thank you for all the kindness you’ve given me throughout the time we’ve known each other, I’ve never said it until now, but it truly has stuck with me and helped me become happier.

@bloodsoakedsakura​ / @idoldragos​

There’s actually a lot I’d like to say, some I’ll leave out for now. For starters, thank you for having my back for three years straight. Seriously. You’ve been there for me through a whole lot, honestly surprised you’ve stuck with me for as long as you have.  You’ve stood up for me when the time came for it and I’m honestly so thankful you did. Every time you hop in call with us it’s usually always fun and stupid (in a good way), so thank you for being part of my band of misfits as long as you have Sades. Even though you’re a boomer who didn’t stop me rolling 200 of my Quartz, I forgive you... dontkillmepls

@yuichiroswife​

Speka, you’ve been a great help to me and Norgie a great amount of times as of late. Thank you so much, you’re an incredibly kind person and I’m glad we became friends!!

@muniificus​

I’ve known you for 3 years too I’m 90% certain, it’s insane how long I’ve known a lot of you - it feels like forever but it also feels like time has gone by so quickly! Much like Sades, I’m very thankful you’ve stuck around for as long as you have Icarus. Thank you for putting up with my dumb ass, and ultimately having fun in return! alsoihavethereplyforanastasiadraftedipromise

@fakepriest​

I’ve sent you an ask with a lot of what would’ve been said in here, but I want to let you know that I’m extremely grateful that you’ve kept being my friend to. I enjoy our conversations a lot, especially when we talk about things like Heaven’s Feel because they’re usually always such fun things to talk about. 

Much like the ask I’ve sent you, your Kirei is so scarily accurate it nearly simulates his actual personality flawlessly. That’s how scary good at writing this tofu loving fake priest. I’m so happy it’s you who’s writing him, not to play the pedestal game, but I genuinely can’t see anyone else (not even myself) coming close to how phenomenal your portrayal is.  #kireisquad

@arkdiia​

Though our first conversation first chatting again wasn’t expected, I’m super glad you came back to Tumblr and I’m thrilled to be friends w you again! Hopefully for 2020, you and I /both/ catch a break lmfao.

@saintguine​

Much like Anna, I’ve already told you what I wanted to here in the form of an ask a few hours ago - however, I do wish to say smth that I’m sure a lot of people feel. Regardless of how you think about yourself, you’re a very good person BB and we’re all very blessed to know you. You’re absolutely one of my best friends, and though there was a point where we lost communication for a bit, I’m very grateful our friendship is the exact same. 

We all care u BB, thank u for bein gud to all of us

Kayla & Sere

This post is incredibly long already, luckily I’m just about done -- but I’ve got three people to go starting with you two!

Sere, you’ve heard me vent a lot and you’ve known me (Kayla has known me this long too) for a pretty damn long time if you ask me, 3 years may not seem like a lot to people, but with all the stuff we’ve all gone through these 3 years? It’s been a LOT and I can’t say I’d be the person I am without you hearing my dumb ass vent and creating Cursed Night.  I appreciate all of your icons, thank you for giving us (Hell) special treatment with them. Seriously! While you are a best friend for sure, you’re also practically family to me. Thank you again for everything. 

Kayla, the same of what I said for Sere is said for you. You’re legit like my older sister, you’ve been there for me for just bout the same amount that Norgie has; you’re someone who means a lot to both me and Norgie, so thank you for giving talking to us a chance way back when you were shy (I think that’s what it was!). There have been a lot of ups and downs for all of us, but I’m glad the downs at least had the positive effect of giving me a second family who I love dearly. I actually teared up on this part, so god help me when I write for Norgie.

@letoborn​ / @uwuwrote​

I’m going to save a lot of what I want to say to you for our anniversary in June, but I will say a few things because I love you so very much.

When I met you, I was not expecting you’d turn out to be the woman of my dreams. You’re genuinely my better half, and I have never been as happy as I am than I am with you. You’ve truly had the biggest impact in my life Norgie, you’ve made me laugh, cheered me up when I’m sad, called me out when I was dumb and helped me better myself. 

I’m so incredibly happy I got to spend the rest of the last decade being your boyfriend, and now, going into 2020 - a whole new decade with you. Like I said, you’re my better half - I can’t see myself with anyone else but you. You’re the greatest treasure in my life, I’m so happy we’ve had all this fun with roleplaying.

Thank you so much Norgie, for giving me Orion/Artemiis, all of our other ships - being my soulmate (at least, I think so). I hope 2020 treats us both well, but I’m willing to go through whatever as long as it’s with you.

Now, that’s the end of that -- but I have a few extra things to say.

My 2019 has been...quite possibly the hardest year of my life, at least on the internet. For a very long time, I was fearful of interacting with others - I made mistakes that I wish I could take back, I got put through hell for nothing...man, I don’t wanna go back in and say what happened, what is and isn’t true -- the long story short is, shit happened, but it’s the past now. 

I want to go into 2020 just..as positive as I can be, I’m tired of the drama, I just want to have fun with my friends and my girlfriend you know? So, I’m finally choosing to move on and just...try having fun again. This choice would be impossible without the people mentioned in this post. 

From the bottom of my heart, thank you to all of you who have stuck around through it all for me. I’m so incredibly thankful to be part of the friendgroup I’m in, to know everyone I’ve met who’s put up with me. I’ve had so many times where I wanted to leave this site, but I wanted to keep trying to write with everyone -- to have fun with everyone. You all have no idea how genuinely happy you’ve all made me, just by writing with my Orion and Norgie’s Artemis. 

Though I couldn’t think of anything to say specifically for the others tagged below here, thank you all for everything as well -- just following me makes me happy. I’m sure I’ve forgotten some people, but trust me, I’m so very happy to know all of you.

@dekirukoto @wisesteyed @lacobscur @akhilleuskcsmcs

[deathvsthemaiden]

Tagged by @kashilascorner to answer these writing questions! I’m not really a writer myself but her answers were v interesting+I know some other writers whose answers to these questions I wouldn’t mind seeing 👀 (I’m going stir crazy courtesy of quarantine+am nosy 🤗) warning/disclaimer/run while you still can alert: bc these qs are aimed at writers and I’m not one these answers aren’t going to “make sense” or “fit” per say, apologies in advance ✌🏽 I draw for fun though so my answers reflect that :P

1. When did you start writing?

I remember in elementary and middle school...I used to draw all sorts of random people in intricate outfits, and would get super into it, and through middle school to early high school especially I was a serial doodler who got in trouble alllll the time (I hold some petty, bitter grudges against a handful of teachers still.) (My eyes may have been on paper instead of on you but I was listening jerkwad! 😑) and like...fantasy was the 1st genre I fell in love with so I would try to come up with stories and whatnot for them but I was (am) so easily distracted and hapless that it went nowhere but I didn’t super mind. I just wanted to draw pretty outfits and the numerous (numerous) other images in my head and....still do. Writing stories requires a little more consistency and commitment than I’m willing to give 🤭😳 To sum up: I am flighty and can’t write for fun so I’ve never honest and to god began 🤷🏽‍♀️

2. Is there any special method that helps you getting to write?

(This is abt academic writing bc aside from texts it’s what I do most) I’m a mostly stationary lump of flesh and time is my catapult. I wait till deadlines are too close for comfort, pump myself full of caffeine, listen to music non stop and suffer suffer suffer.

Or on increasingly less rare (thank god) occasions when I am almost on top of things, I listen to music and pace around my room, typing in the google docs app on my phone while I type out garbled stream-of-consciousness notes-to-self, while considering the prompt, so future me has /something/ to work with. With the pacing it takes longer to write than when I’m at a desk but like. It’s less painful and I barely notice.

3. Do you listen to certain types of music to set the mood?

I have low tolerance for any slow/sad/soulful/hypnotic/crying songs so anything upbeat works and also I NEED lyrics most of the time, I have an almost as low tolerance for instrumentals. Like they’re fine but I also find myself sitting there waiting for something to “happen” (I’m sorry shcjfnfn) I listen to music while doing most things and, like pacing, I think it elongates tasks but also makes them less painful so!

4. Drawing, moodboards, character makers, music lists or none of those options?

All of those are fun, usually music and other people’s art is what inspires me to draw most though.

5. Would you prefer a big Hollywoodesque adaptation, a smaller project coming from the heart or no adaptation at all?

I usually have medium to major gripes with the most popular/big adaptations of books I feel strongly about so the 2nd option ✌🏽

6. Do you have any taboos or topics you try to actively avoid?

I’ll answer this as a reader. I have my limits to how much suffering I can read child characters in particular go through like I’ve dropped a book or two before for disturbing me too much in that regard. They weren’t bad!! I just personally didn’t wanna weather through that so I didn’t. I dropped Arundathi Roy’s The God of Small Things because of this, even though I loveddd the prose! :( I might try out her other book (books?) one day though. Stories dealing with such dark topics are important when done right etc. I just can’t stomach them 8/10 times

7. Are you in favor or against spoilers?

If the opportunity to experience whatever is being spoiled myself is unlikely/a long time coming/difficult to attain (because it has to be translated, localized, I need to wait a while to get my hands on a copy etc) I’m probably really really eager for spoilers and will search them out/ask people. If it’s something that consistently thrills me I /definitely/ do not want spoilers though!

Trying to get spoilers from me for things I love and have recommended is usually difficult, like I’ll do it you just have to show me you reallllly are sure you want this splendiddddd story ruineD for you! D:< (I joke. Spoilers don’t ruin good stories, not completely anyway)

8. Have you ever written something to appease or spite somebody else?

To appease? That’s my whole academic “”career”” lollll *shot* not to spite no! Sounds painstaking....like you need to make eff*rt 🥴 or smth.... 😬 mad and sincere respect to anyone out there with the drive to do that though! I’m just not that kind of gal......... I’m more than open to like. Proposing alternative versions of stuff that’s dissatisfied me when talking to friends (like x SUCKED it would’ve been so much better if y and z and t and v! Don’t u agree?) and I’ve drawn a few fan arts before where I like, edit character designs that infuriate me for being tasteless.

9. Being given the options “Candy Valley of the Lollipop” or “Cliff of Despair and Looming”, which one would you say approximates better to your WIP’s general aesthetic?

Hmm. Probs candy valley, Most of my ideas for drawing are like sunny in terms of mood, if that makes any sense. I love my fiction (as in the stuff I consume, not make) on the darker side though as long as it’s not like, pointless and obnoxious about it.

10. A media you weren’t expecting to inspire you, but does.

Hmm. Realistic fiction is nice but I can’t subsist on it, I need fantasy and magical realism and whatnot to stay sane, but sometimes I read a realistic fiction book and I have such crystal clear images of the scenes in my head and it impacts me so strongly that I really, really (really) am inspired to draw them (The Overstory by Richard Powers and The Little Friend by Donna Tartt come to mind)

Tagging: @howaboutswords @pinkafropuffs @adorakeys and anyone who sees this and would like to answer these questions totally should!! Tag me! 🏷

[petiteyoon]

Check-in tag !!

I'M SO LATE AAAAAAA anyways, tagged by my luvs @imyourhobiii and @jiminza <3

1. why did you choose your url?

Because it's c u t e and because a little bit of bottom!yoongi a day keeps the doctor away

2. any sideblogs? if you have them, name them and why you have them?

I just have one and it's my reading blog, I still have to properly use it tho lmao y'all can find it somewhere on my acc if u want

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

I don't know, I first discovered tumblr when I was 14 I think. And I'm 20 now sooo... 6 years?

4. do you have a queue tag?

I don't know what it is and how to use it so no lmao

5. why did you start your blog in the first place?

At first I used to write on wattpad (5sos fics LMAOO). dark times :D ... I still have the acc tho! self promo? nah i just wanna show how hawt is my url there bc I changed it yesterday. then I took a break from that, it lasted a couple of years... after a while I thought about picking up writing again and I thought,, why not doing it here? I had a bts edits blog previously tho. Then I started this one <3

6. why did you choose your icon?

I personally love png icons and yoongi! I took this one from this post (idk if i should tag them or not lmao but check out their blog, i love it.)

7. why did you choose your header?

Because it's MINIMINI >:( and i did it myself :3 in fact, it sucks BYE and it doesn't work on desktop, i hate it.

8. what's your post with the most notes?

uhmmm,, this one ?? I think it's my first yoongi smut lmao

9. how many mutuals do you have?

the right amount(?) i didn't check ? HAHAHA but i love every moot and follower i have <3

10. how many followers do you have?

159 🥺 i am: smol ! I'm planning on writing smth, idk maybe a drabble, to celebrate my 150 followers mini milestone even if I am late LIKE I ALWAYS AM

11. how many people do you follow?

114 precious frogs

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

No, I don't have the strength to do that. I already scream under my moots' posts sometimes

13. how often do you use tumblr each day?

the. whole. day. instead of studying! (don't be like me please)

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once? who won?

Other than harmless battles between me, a mint choco lover (sorry joon), and mint choco haters; nah hahahah i'm peaceful and soft and old bye

15. how do you feel about "you need to reblog this" posts?

If it's important I'll do it (?)

16. do you like tag games?

Yes ! They keep me alive ;-; so tag me everywhere u want !!

17. do you like ask games?

Yup, same reason as before uwu

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

Meh, I don't understand the logic of being "tumblr famous". I'm just happy that a couple of writers I really like started to follow me :))

19. do you have a crush on a mutual?

No. but if someone wants to try,, I'm here😤✋🏻

Okay finally I reached the end hahah I'm tagging everyone who wants to do this, consider yourselves tagged by me :') it's morning and i'm dying i'm sorry

[wuunderstruck-a]

one - ten !!

welcome to 2k18 rp meme — no longer accepting lmfao

thank u to shannon for being Extra and sending me literally every question in this meme, ily

ten faceclaims i’ve used in the past

ooh boy. this is a hard one. daniel sunjata (as paul briggs), chloe bennet as skye (bc we didn’t know her as daisy johnson then lmfao), and everyone on my (currently) inactive list. EDIT: i forgot, shannon purser!!! god i love her tbh i miss her.

nine faceclaims i want to use in the future

answered here!

eight present/past characters

i’ve had so many characters it’s hard to even remember them BUT I SHALL TRY.

cait scott, a character from a wip of mine who won a contest to appear on a teen television show and was catapulted to fame (i’ve toyed with revamping her and bringing her here also yes her name was a play on ‘great scott!’)

madison caverly, my very very first rp muse. i made her on an oc blog in 2013 and she was my first foray into the rp world. she’s got a few flaws but i have an immense soft spot for her and i brought her over to indie with me.

nadia johnson, my character that i made for my very first d&d campaign. i quickly fell in love with her and even though we’re not playing that campaign rn, i brought her to indie and she’s one of my favorite characters i’ve made for anything. she’s so resilient and brave and has so many layers i have to explore.

owen wheeler, one of my first characters i made on this blog. i had no idea what to do with him until @warmhcney suggested this plot idea and suddenly, owen sprang to life. he’s now a real person in my head and i can never go back. my life has been changed by him, as weird as it is to say. thank you, del, for suggesting owen and molly, because without them i wouldn’t have owen as he is today.

silas trask, another one of my early muses for this. i honestly don’t know where the idea for him came from, really. but he’s honestly a person of his own and a lil shit. every time i write a reply for him the words fly off my fingers, his sassy retorts taking shape on their own. he makes me laugh every time, and i love him so much.

max wheeler, my lost boy. i made him for a group rp and then i realized… dude. what if he’s owen’s younger brother? the rest is history. max is constantly searching, constantly hurting, constantly falling apart. and god, he just needs to be loved. this is just my daily reminder how much max needs love and it’s also an excuse for me to cry about him, thank u.

i also just remembered two old characters from a novel, quinn & nadine. i made them when i was still struggling with accepting my sexuality, and they were an outlet for me to express that. i rly need to do something with them soon bc they were so important to me.

seven characters i want to play

oH BOY OH BOY

ok. so i want to play this cop that’s too soft to actually be a cop, yanno? i think this was inspired by a reddit thread or smth. but i have had this idea for a while, just struggled with the actual execution of it.

i don’t have enough actual bad muses, i rly struggle with playing those, so this is just a general umbrella that i want to do that.

more secret agents & mob bosses in general; i live for that shit.

i rly want this spoiled billionaire daddy’s girl, but i haven’t figured out how to play her w/o me actually hating her guts, so that’s on hold for now.

an actual douche boy that actually fucks a bunch of people, but i have a hard time again figuring out how to play him w/o me actually hating his guts. i have a lot of internal problems can u tell i also keep giving my muses soft sides gdi

one half of a married couple where someone plays one half and i play the other idk just throwin that out there ;) ;) ;)

i rly wanna play bex taylor-klaus as well, plus just add more butch muses to my repertoire in general

six plots of the past/present

well like i mentioned above, owen wheeler was basically spawned from a plot involving a “grumpy secret agent” having to take care of a younger spoiledish girl basically? i think ??? i’D HAVE TO FIND IT but that was a pretty iconic plot omfg (hi del)

i’m a very big hoe for the childhood friends to lovers trope, @hiitchhikers​ and i have riley & lorelai and the og, gianna & leo that fall into this and im in love

idk why i’m suddenly blanking rip

most of the plots i have rn have been super organic from the chemistry that has happened between our muses? that doesnt mean i don’t like doing plots that are in my wishlist tag (bc i LOVE it), but i also like winging it!!!

five plots i want to do in the future

like i said, i would love to do a preestablished-type marriage plot with someone (if we were discussing this already, i’m so sorry, i’m trash. pls nudge me again)

i also was thinking how much i would love to make muses who have siblings with other mun’s muses? @lucywrites​ and i did this with silas and flora trask and it was the best decision of my life

i’ve also rly wanted to do some celebrity plots??? something like this tbh or anything rly

i also was thinking about the cast of tv shows and how they literally are a family and someday i want to do a mumu based on that. imagine all the relationships !!! the drama !!! everything

i also love all those single parent + kindergarten teacher plots — my single parent muses luna & sebastián would be perfect for this, or even joss who takes care of her younger brother

four ships

listen, i tried to pick, but it ended up being IMPOSSIBLE. i love you all so much, thank you for giving me these ships. to everyone who ships with me, you mean the world. 

three friendships

lyra, lorelai, & jack – @hiitchhikers & @niallhcran

wesley, sally, & heather – @peytrps & @warmhcney

nadine & savannah, katy & molly, celine & the wheelers – @warmhcney

p.s. — i want more platonic ships… pls come @ me

two roleplays

i’m going to say @epochhq & @sundridgehq! both have such kind souls and i’ve met so many good people through them. 

one partner

again, picking would be impossible. thank you all for shipping, rping, and interacting with me. i’m sorry for being so slow & sucky at replying to messages & threads, but i love you all so much. it means so much that you’re here, thank you for sticking around. I LOVE YOU!

[trojanjean]

questions for ao3 writers

tagged by @meimagino, thank you dsgsfa !! <3 <3 

Tagging: @kumikirin and @rayraywrites ! i don’t actually know a lot of ao3 writers SO PLEASE DO THIS AND TAG ME? <3 i’ve LOVED reading other people doing this tag and it’s so exciting to know more abt your stuff so please please if u use ao3 and wanna do this, please let me know! <3

1. How did you come up with your username and what does it mean?

my username is seaworn. i didn’t want my ao3 username to be the same as my tumblr url because my tumblr url is pretty much always associated with a certain fandom and i didn’t want that because i had a feeling that i’m going to write something for different fandoms. seaworn is a word i came across in one of nightwish’s lyrics, “sea-worn driftwood”. i just thought that was nice, and everything sea-related is really close to my heart. 

2. Which fanfic of yours has the most feedback? (bookmarks/subscriptions/hits/kudos)

fingers crossed my obsession with you is tameable has most hits, kudos and bookmarks, but my heart’s a stereo (it beats for you so listen close) has most subscriptions (because it’s an ongoing series).

3. What is your AO3 profile icon, and why did you choose it?

it’s a picture of some random boy who i think looks a lot like my favourite trainwreck boy harry and i wanted it lmao 

4. Do you have any regular/favourite commenters?

 i get really warm and giddy if someone i know comments something on my fics because it means the world to me that my friends read my shit asdgdfs. but i also get warm and giddy and excited when i get any kinds of comments!! <3 i appreciate every single comment i get and i sometimes cry when i get an email notification about a comment someone left me asfsg <3 i notice a few “regulars” that always comment of my stories when i publish something new and i LOVE them and it means the world to me that someone has subscribed to me/checks out my page to see whether i’ve published smth new. but i ALSO love people who just leave kudos bc seeing that someone has actually read my stuff? amazing. i love every single one of you so much. i go through my comments and my kudos/hits whenever i’m feeling down/insecure and they give me so much confidence and make me feel better about everything

5. Is there a fanfic that you keep going back to read again and again?

oh yeah, i have plenty!! i mean, i have over 500 bookmarks and i go through them a lot to read many of my old favourites. i’m going to list a few i could remember without actually browsing through my bookmarks! :) they’re mostly drarry because i’m super into that again. also i really wanna scream about all of these but i’m just gonna link them and let them speak for themselves sdgdfsg 

Twingenuity by Caeseria. Viktuuri, explicit, 160k. summary: “Victor arrives in Hasetsu, completely unaware that Yuuri has an identical, overly affectionate, twin brother. The resulting temptation might actually kill him before he gets Yuuri to the GPF like he promised.”

Coffee, Cakes And Doorknob Snakes by Omi_Ohmy. drarry, explicit, 40k. summary: “Harry's house is trying to kill him, and only one person can help him: pity it's Draco Malfoy”

Eternally Consistent by kitsunealyc. drarry, explicit, 40k. summary: “Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter assumed they would never be anything but civil enemies, until Potter lands on Malfoy's doorstep, bleeding, covered in curses, and acting very strangely indeed.”

Reparations by Saras_Girl. drarry, explicit, 87k. summary: “Harry is about to discover that the steepest learning curve comes after Healer training, and that second chances can be found in unexpected places.”

Winter Song by proantagonist. viktuuri, explicit, 149k. summary: “The set of Yuuri’s mouth softened into a private smile as Victor squeezed his knee beneath the table. His hands were bare, free from the gloves he so often wore when they were together on the rink, and the heat of his palm burned straight through the denim of Yuuri’s jeans. He slipped his own hand beneath the table and found Victor’s. Hidden from sight, their fingers began to flirt and play. A secret conversation all their own that needed no words.

Yuuri was aware that at some point—a moment in time he couldn’t quite place—Victor had become his boyfriend.

There wasn’t a single instant when it happened. It was a slow awareness, as if Victor had silently been asking the question for months now, and Yuuri had been giving him the answer a little more with each passing day.”

i’d love to link everything i like but aSFASD!! just believe me when i say that with 500 bookmarks and having lots of writer friends in tumblr, i read a LOT of the same fics over and over and over again. the ones i mentioned just now are all longer stories i fell in love with because it took me days and maybe even weeks to read them and it’s like i’d found a whole new universe?? you can def ask me for fic recs because all i do is read fics but i found it really hard to just pick a few so i decided to pick just a few longer ones for this question!! but ask me for my favourite coffee shop aus? do it. favourit otayuri fics? ya please. fav modern au captive prince fics? you really should. 

6. How many stories are you subscribed to? How many do you have bookmarked?

i can’t see the number of my subscriptions anywhere? but i get maybe 3-10 email notifications every day about an updated work so i guess it’s a lot. i have a little over 500 bookmarks! :)) 

7. Which AU do you find yourself writing the most?

hmm, i maybe haven’t written enough to have, like, a special au i enjoy writing? but i DO think about coffee shop au’s and writing them a lot so i guess it’s that asfdsf. i just really really love coffee shops?? 

8. How many people are subscribed and bookmarked to you in total? (you can view this on the stats page)

274 subscriptions and 704 bookmarks holy sHIT hey i love every single one of you?? 

9. Is there something you’d like to write about but are afraid of people judging you for it? (Feeling brave? If so, share it!)

i have a bunch of really, really sad and depressing headcanons i would love to write but i’m probably never gonna? like, lots of things about eating disorders and cutting and someone getting injured or cheated on, someone losing an important person or having to give up on their dreams, etc. lots of sad characters trying to be brave on their own and slowly fading away :’’)) i don’t want to write then because i haven’t come up with any good endings for those and i DON’T want to write stuff with no happy ending, so. i just really think i need to get out all kinds of crap rn and writing them would make me feel better but i think i’m too involved to actually write something worth reading? i fear that if i wrote smth i’ve headcanoned, it would end up being super immature and illogical. idk. my point it that i’m afraid to write really self-indulgent, depressing angst sadgsghdf 

10. Is there anything you would like to be better at? Writing certain scenes or genres, replying to comments, updating better, etc.

i would love to be a little more consistent in writing. my concentration is bad and often i can’t get into the flow when i’m working on something. usually i add something to a wip every few days, then one day i write 1000 words and then continue editing sentences here and there, jumping from scene to scene, deleting smth and then adding 57 words. like...i often feel like i can’t get into the scene i’m writing and it feels like i’m watching it on the outside instead of being the writer? whenever i can focus properly i get solid, consistent, meaningful writing done, but honestly 80% of me doing anything is messing around and i have to do A LOT of damage control before everything is finished? 

this is related to what i just described but i’d also love to be able to write chronologically because i feel it makes the story and the journey more real when i’m actually working through what my characters are feeling/experiencing throughout the story? instead of writing an exciting plot thing A and an exciting plot thing number B and then later writing the boring parts inbetween. 

i have a lot of problems with plots in general - i feel it’s easier for me to write 2 k about, like, yuuri making tea in the morning, than writing 2k about someone walking to the store and buying milk. i’m better at describing moments and feelings than concrete plot points or someone dojng something? idk. 

11. Do you write rarepairs or popular ships more often?

popular ships. i mean, i might read rarepairs but i usually have one or two otp’s from each fandom i write about. i’d love to write about chrisabek one day though sgdfg. 

12. How many stories have you posted on AO3 to this day (finished and unfinished)?

18 ???? what how when has this happened?? .  13 of those are yoi and the rest either drarry or johnlock. 

13. How many stories do you have saved in/with your writing program?

18 published works and about....25-30 unfinished things? some over 10k words, some less than 500. also but i wrote A LOT of original shit when i was like 16-18 so if i count those in the number would be about 100 probably

14. Do you write down story ideas, or just keep them in your head?

i write them down potential ideas, but i have a lot of headcanons i don’t write down because i don’t think i have the ability to write them. but most of my ideas go to google docs/notes. 

15. Have you ever co-authored a story?

yeah, i actually have one wip going on with someone :) it’s unfinished but maybe we’ll finish it one day? it’s drarry and super sweet. 

16. How did you discover AO3?

i really can’t remember? i wish i could? but it probably in 2012 when i got into the sherlock fandom. 

17. Do you consider yourself to be a popular or famous author in your fandom(s) on AO3?

i don’t think so omg, but i’m really glad people read my stuff! but i’m definitely more known in the yoi fandom than the others i’m in bc my drarry/johnlock fics get like 5 comments, max, whereas i can get 20 comments to my yuri on ice stuff! :) it’s really nice that people read my stuff fhdh 

18. Do you have a nickname or fandom name for your readers?

omfg no but everyone who reads my stuff is an actual Angel  

19. Was there an author who inspired or encouraged you to write?

yeah, a lot! a lot of original fiction authors & a lot of fanfiction authors! whenever i read a good text i’m like “wow, this is awesome, i wish i could write this well” and that always gives me a huge boost. the support of my friends is really encouraging and inspiring, too. 

20. What writing advice would you give to a beginning author?

the “i will be a stronger writer after i finish this piece” is REALLY good advice, because...not everything you write will be the best you’ve done and you maybe feel like your writing has some flaws or something. but you know what? even if it’s not perfect, you’re a lot more experienced writer when you’ve done it. i do the “it’s gonna be shit anyway so i’m not gonna write it” thing quite often but then i have to remind myself that every single word i write gets me closer to being better, so i plunder through. and when i get finished with something, i usually think “well, this is not my strongest work but i’m glad i did it” and!!!! that’s really it!! i took part in otayuri reverse bang this spring and god i wanted to give up so so many times and i wrote lots of plots for it because i didn’t like ANYTHING i did. but i got through it, and while i think that the two stories i did for it are the worst i’ve written, it’s still 18 000 words more than i would have written if i hadn’t participated :) be your own biggest supporter & give yourself time to practise & be super proud and happy about what you’ve achieved so far!! <3 you wrote 10 words today? THAT’S 10 WORDS MORE THAN IT WAS BEFORE. you had a huge writer’s block so instead of writing you just wrote down some plot point you wanna write later? YOU PLANNED SOMETHING. you couldn’t even plan, you just opened your computer and gave up? YOU TRIED AND RESPECTED YOUR LIMITS TODAY AND THAT’S AMAZING. 

21. Do you plot out your stories, or do you just figure it out as you go?

i usually plan big plot points but figure everything else out as i go? planning in actually one of my weaknesses and instead of making a plan and sticking to it, i just wait for inspiration and get as much done as i can before it goes away, lol. 

22. Have you ever gotten a bad comment on a story? If so, what did you do?

not really :) everyone has been really sweet to me. 

23. Is there a certain type of scene that you have a hard time writing? (action, smut, etc..)

action scenes are pretty hard? i think i’m better at writing dialogue and feelings than action or something dramatic happening. i’m working on it and i would love to get more edge to my writing! 

24. What story(s) are you working on now?

i’m finishing the last part of my heart’s a radio (it beats for you so listen close). the chapter is what i intended to write in the first place (yuri and otabek seeing each other at world’s and getting it on in a hotel room) but then i just....needed to have 14 000 words of stuff before it, apparently. 

i’m also working on a drarry fic that has been in my drafts for a long time. it’s about 8k and i think it’s going to be 10-13k, and that’s fine. it’s all about margaritas and blowjobs and being hungover, basically. it’s really fun to write lol.

and then i have this captive prince smut one shot that’s also like half-done. it’s really fluffy and sappy but still just smut. 

aaaaalso i’m trying to finish the next chapter for my viktuuri dog sitter au fic now my heart stumbles on things i don’t know ! i’ve been procrastinating because i don’t really have a plot for it planned yet. 

25. Do you plan your next project(s) before you finish your current ongoing story(s)?

i have too many ideas in my head constantly and that makes it reaally hard to focus on finishing something before jumping onto something else. that’s why i have tons of wips and no finished works, lmao. 

26. Do you have a daily writing goal set for yourself?

not really. sometimes i try to push myself by setting goals, but in the end it really stresses me out because i’m usually away from home at least 9 hours every day and my work is really physical and tiring so asfsgas i really don’t have the strength to write every day. now my goal is to finish three fics before the year ends. they’re all oneshots that are maybe 80% done, so i should be able to do it. 

27. Do you think you’ve improved as a writer since you first started?

i hope so but i really don’t know?? 

28. What is your favorite story that you’ve written?

hmm. it’se been really fun writing i am to see to it that i do not lose you series because i’ve gotten a LOT of positive feedback along the way! and i’m not done with the series - i have a chrisviktuuri smut oneshot planned in this universe, happening at the same time when yuri’s figuring out how to date™. it was the first part of the series that made me think that maybe people actually enjoy my stuff & that encouraged me to write more!

I also really liked writing a oneshot i hust posted yesterday - listen how, under the breastbone, the rhythm changes . i wrote my first yuri on ice fic about a year ago and i just really wanted to return to that moment and write smth sweet about viktor and yuuri. the story has no plot or anything, but it felt REALLY good to write bc i sort of want and need a lot of soft things right now! 

also i’m having SO MUCH FUN with the drarry fic i haven’t posted yet, omg. 

29. What is your least favorite story that you’ve written?

hmm. probably cautiously peering, absorbing, translating hey eve stop with the pretentious fic names  because it was basically my first multichapter fic and i feel like it fell apart a little? i had to write it in less than a month bc it was part of otayuri reversebang. i felt like the idea was good and that it didn’t reach its full potential? i have very mixed feelings about this fic. i haven’t been able to read it even once after i published it bc i’m so afraid of what i’ll find lmao 

30. Where do you see yourself (as a writer) in 5 years?

hopefully my english is a lot better then, at least! i hope that i’ve started writing original fiction, really :) 

31. What is the easiest thing about writing?

coming up with ideas!!! i don’t even use most of the ideas hat get in my head and i get lots of new ideas especially when i’m at work, out doing shopping, basically doing anything active??  but writing everything down, especially ideas you know will get 20-30k long once you start...damn. 

32. What is the hardest thing about writing?

managing long stories? i haven’t written very many longer (like, over 10k?) stories and dgsgsg it’s just hard to make the plot interesting with lots of interesting cliffhangers, sad parts, etc? it’s hard to balance everything. 

and yeah writing just in general is hard because it’s at least 80% writer’s block but having ideas flood your head and making it hard to focus on real life sfsg

33. Why do you write?

to express myself, i think? i still haven’t learn how to process my more uglier emotions through writing (it would be really helpful if i could) but i’m definitely writing about the kind of things i miss and would like to have for myself - someone being really happy, having lots of quiet mornings, being loved, maybe being a trainwreck but having something to cope through it, having a special connection with someone. idk. all kinds of things.

writing is fun and actually writing down the fics you’d want to read is super duper cool. i don’t get very much done in my life otherwise, so writing gives me the feeling of accomplishment i’m not getting anywhere else. 

i’m not very good at expressing myself so writing definitely helps with that, too. 

[frenchibi]

Tagged

1. Post the rules 2. Answer the questions given to you by the tagger 3. Write 11 questions of your own 4. And tag 11 people

I was tagged by @hajiiwa, thank you dear!! (I still really love your blog title btw? Wow)

These were her questions:

1. if given the ability, would you want to see how or when you die?

Definitely not. I know I’m prone to freaking out over these things and. I’m iffy about the whole “seeing the future thing” because I don’t believe everything is set in stone? So basically I reject the whole concept of being able to see how I will definitely die and when :’D

2. do you believe in the concept of virginity?

No. I saw this wonderful post the other day that was like “if you value a woman more for her purity than her personality then you can go out and mark your territory with the other dogs” or smth and that sums up my opinion on that pretty well.

3. if there was one thing you could let a stranger know about you instantly, what would it be?

How hard I’m trying.

4. any specific tastes/smells you associate with a time in your life/from your childhood?

Oh, this is hard. I know there are many, but… mostly I’d have to be confronted with them in order to remember? Like, I can’t really think of any off the top of my head.

5. how long do you believe you could go without seeing or hearing from those closest to you?

A week, tops, I’d get nervous that something happened to them tbh? I’m a person who needs to talk a lot and I’m a worrier so ^^

6. a song you feel encapsulates (to some degree) your personality?

Empire by Of Monsters And Men (this is what I aspire to be tbh)

White Flag by Joseph (this is me finding my strength again)

Invincible by Hedley (this is cheesy but. idk. I relate.)

7. one thing you wish you could change about yourself, physically or otherwise?

…wouldn’t it be rad to have wings? Fly?? See in the dark??

But also I’d like to be more patient, kind, empathetic, relaxed. Less impulsive, without losing my enthusiasm.

8. the last pleasant interaction with a stranger you had?

Yesterday at around 10pm my neighbor rang my doorbell and asked for a bottle opener. I’d never talked to her, but in the end I helped her open her wine and she came in to my apartment and said she liked what I’d done with the place lmao

9. one person you wish you could be with right now?

I’m lucky that most people I want to see are close enough so I can… arrange to see them? And the ones that are far away – well, we’re making plans :D

10. do you like the feeling of goosebumps rising on your skin?

Not… particularly. Except when they’re caused by a rising storm. Then by all means carry me away. But I mostly get goosebumps when I’m cold and that is... not pleasant ^^

11. a motto or ideal you try to keep in mind, especially when times are tough?

In all honesty… the last time when times were tough I lost sight of everything, even the ideals I tried to cling to. The only thing I can say in retrospect is… I needed help, and I got it before it was too late. Sometimes it’s okay to need help.

My questions for the people I’m tagging:

what makes you feel alive?

how long has it been since you laughed until you cried?

what’s your comfort song, the one you go to when you need to feel you’re not alone?

how many books have you read?

tag someone whose work (art, writing, edits etc.) you love!

do a small unexpected favor for someone - buy someone flowers, offer to help with housework, tell a friend something that reminds you of them. How did they react?

do you like writing letters?

do you smile at strangers?

would you commission fanart or fanfics?

what’s your favorite hot beverage?

what color is your favorite to wear?

I tag @hajiiwa if you wanna answer my questions, @sound-of-inspiration, @marleeb, @hanavmaki, @astersandstuffs, @xhelloxbeautifullx, @zhenya-kotik, @distinguisheddelusions, @cheetahleopard, @seamorered, @sakuragimichi, @lalikaa, @greenstickynotes

(Yes i know that’s 12, technically 13, I don’t care, @notinvidia and @annoyed-basically and @phea-chan and @peymakalir you can do this too if you want lmao)

[precious-nico]

i was tagged by @alzheimersparrotroute​ for 30 questions to knowing a person better! thanks!

i’ll tag @hanayoyos​ @danithepanda​ @viktuuri-on-love​ @quietanarchist​ @beastkonohaworld​ but y’all don’t hafta do this (or if anyone wanna talk about theyself y’all can say i tagged u or smth)

1.       Are you named after anyone? I was actually supposed to be named after my mother’s favorite celebrity singer dude, Andy Lau, but before I was born, like two people stole the name who the family knew, like one on my father’s side and one on my mother’s side so she was like Aaron’s fine too (so no).

2.       When was the last time you cried? Today because I was rereading Gash Bell and I got hit with the feels™.

3.       Do you have kids? I have a son and his name is Gash Bell and he is the best son ever he’s done so much he’s the best I love him he’s my son the best son ever my son and his name is Gash Bell, the golden boy, the light of my life, the best ever to exist ever in the world ever the most wonderful child in the world ever that there ever was the absolute best the greatest an all-star the most wondrous awe inspiring

4.       If you were another person, would you be a friend of yourself? Probably? Because I try my hardest to become friends with people with similar interests and I have a lot of similar interests with myself.

5.       Do you use sarcasm a lot? I’d say I use quite a bit of sarcasm.

6.       What’s the first thing you notice about people? Tbh their noses.

7.       What is your eye color? Brown, but like a very dark shade of brown

8.       Scary movie or happy endings? Happy endings! 

9.       Favorite smells? Bread! Also nice soap! Also these chocolate buns my family buys from the market!

10.   What’s the furthest you’ve ever been from home? A few states over I guess?

11.   Do you have any special talents? I’m pretty decent at making edits and stuff. Also, I’m pretty good at petting dogs.

12.   Where were you born? Massachusetts.

13.   What are your hobbies? Reading manga, watching anime, playing games, petting animals, singing in my loudest voice to songs as badly as possible, collecting stuff (low-key hoarding), also stuffed animals.

14.   Do you have any pets? I have two dogs! Mikey and Leo!

15.   Do you have any siblings? I have a singular sister.

16.   What do you want to be when you grow up? I wanna work as a programmer but low-key I just wanna be a farmer or maybe like a mangaka.

17.   Who was your first best friend? This one kid named Timmy I knew in first grade before I moved to Georgia.

18.   How tall are you? 5′8 I think it was.

19.   Funniest moment throughout School? Idk if this is the funniest but it’s pretty recent, but I was doing a group project with this kid and he said he would start it, but it was sunday night and it was due monday so I started it and I did all the work correctly but I added a bunch of random pics, (like not even memes just strange pictures and gifs) and I presented it and it was really funny to me, and we had graphs, so I put the clip of that one nickleback song but its just the part where he;s like look at this graph and my teacher just burst out laughing and she kept playing it over and over again it was fun ( i can;t think of a funniest moment rn but w/e) (if anyone remembers the slide I had all the juicy;s in that’s it) (also the link bc i still have it and idk what to do with it) https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/1SbPtFqns4sYi-FDtvUU7_K3N6-IgCe7wyjKjZqEM-pk/edit?usp=sharing (my partner added some memes but i don’t get them)

20.   How many countries have you visited? Just 2.

21.   What was your favorite/worst subject in High School? Favorite subject was computer science until senior year. Worst subject was computer science in senior year (I did great in that class but ahhhhHHHHHH)

22.   What is your Favorite drink? Animal? Perfume? Favorite drink is probably jasmine tea. Favorite animal is bunny. Favorite perfume Bamboo by Franc Olivier bc I bought it for my mom last year and I like how it smells and ts and it came with lotion and I could use the lotion,

23.   What would you (or have you) name your children? Idk probably like Gash or something( if I get twins they gonna be Gash and Zeon I hope they don’t have  a super intense prolonged fight ntil they become family again

24.   What Sports do you play/Have you played? None i’m a fragile child my bones are made of glass and my skin is made of paper.

25.   Who are some of your favorite YouTubers? I like CrazyRussianHacker, CowChop, a Japanese gamer called PockySweets, VlogAfterCollege, Ryan Higa, Jenna Marbles, mugumogu (the famous cat Maru), Superwoman,  いとくとら ikura(Japanese dancer), SlyFoxHound,  miomio3030303(a cute llil pom), like all the Hello!Pro groups .

26.   How many Girlfriends/Boyfriends have you had? 0 lol.

27.   Favorite memory from childhood? Discovering Gash Bell!

28.   How would you describe your fashion sense? Lazy, but comfortable, and also like sometimes a 5 year old.

29.   What phone do you have? (iOS v Android?) Android.

30.   Tell us one of your bad habits! Whenever I decide to do anything, I immediately start doing like 3 other things, i.e I started rereading the Gash Bell even though I’m trying to finish rewatching Nichijou and actually finish Gintama and finish the AssClass anime and FMA and also beat the endgame of Fire Emblem Echoes SOV, also get all the husbands and wives in Fates and Awakening and I need to properly throw away my stuff from High School, and also finish reading superwoman’s book.