#destroying angel is my favorite i might draw some other stuff with them :3

[benzshroomart]

i've been doing Funguary on instagram for the last month while taking a breather from working on my FOP reimagining comic! Been having loads of fun with it- here's the ones I did for week 1 and 2! some done on procreate, some done on Paint Tool Sai!

[deepdonutkid]

Can I ask for multiple character break downs?👀

Well if I can, then would you please do one for Ada and one for Tommy and one for John

But if only one has to be done, then you can choose any one of these.

Thanks! <3

Thanks for the ask! 💞

Ada Thorne nee Shelby

How I feel about this character

Just love for her! She is adorable, strong, fierce, absolutely amazing! Ada and Polly are the best developed female character on the show. Mainly, because Tommy can’t fuck them, so they can’t be reduced to his love interest, which is such a good thing, because I love strong women. Makes me weak in my knees.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

Freddie Thorne, Ben Younger, Jessie Eden, because Ada is bi, she just gives off that vibe, u know.

Somehow I prefer to read stuff with a female reader for her, more than a male reader for her. Because it’s either Freddie x Ada for me or Ada x female reader.

My non-romantic OTP for this character

Lizzie, Polly, Ada and Linda are an amazing combination! She and Tommy have an interesting dynamic as well! I would have loved to see more John and Ada interactions, because they have not such a big age gap inbetween, so I think they are close. Especially after Ada got her child and John got married with Esme. Oh, Ada and Esme would have sooo much fun together. Esme would be like the sister Ada never had.

My unpopular opinion about this character

I think her character changed a lot between season 1 and 2, because of Freddie’s death and also after she joined the business again. Sometimes when I make memes or the alignment charts, I have two icons for her, one from first season and one from third season, because I think she is one of the characters who changed the most through the series. First season Ada would do a lot of things different and more naive than third season Ada. Mainly, because she still believed in communism in season 1 and she somehow lost her faith after losing Freddie. Which is super understandable tho.

She acutally becomes wiser with age... unlike her brothers, who just do the same shit over and over again.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

I wished Ben hadn’t died, because they kill her lovers even fast than Tommys. WTF, right?

On the other hand I wished Ada talked some sense into Jessie, to NOT SLEEP WITH TOMMY THE WHORE SHELBY! Because Ada knows her brother very well and I think she genuinely liked Jessie, or she liked her enough to save her from the pain of being Tommy’s toy or pleasure doll.

And I’m still bitter about the way they killed of Freddie... but more about that later...

Tommy Shelby

How I feel about this character

Relationship status: It’s complicated!

Yes, well, I ramble about Tommy’s shit a lot. I know! He is still an intersting character and it’s so tempting to think about his actions in certain situations, but if I would meet him as a person- I would hate him from the bottom of my heart! <3

He is such an asshole all the time and when I first watched the show, I forgave him a lot he did to his siblings, because I was caught up with his good looks and the presentation of him being the good guy who does bad things to survive. But I spend some time to think about his actions and I noticed, he is an awful human being... to Polly, to his siblings, to his lover and actually to everyone. He might think he does all those mean things to archive a bigger goal, but he is just a gambling addict who can’t stop taking risks he isn’t even prepared for.

Shitty things Tommy has done over time:

Forcing his brother to marry somebody, John didn’t even know at that time, to end a feud, Tommy had started himself and only when it was in his favour to end it, he used John as pawn, so he could archive his plan. HOW FUCKED UP WAS THAT? Nobody seems to talk about this. It was fucking awful! And the way he did it was horrible to! Tommy said nothing to John until the very last moment, when they were already surrounded by enemies, so John couldn’t said no. It also shows, that Tommy thinks he is above his siblings. Tommy thought John wasn’t capable of chosing a wife for himself, so Tommy did that for him too. Even when John didn’t ask for this at all!

Destroying Ada’s relationship with Freddie and chasing his best friend out of town, just because... TOMMY WAS AGAINGST HIS SISTER HAVING A RELATIONSHIP. and yet he proclaimes to listen to woman and to give them a fair change. Maybe just not for our dear Ada!

Destroying Arthur’s marriage, because he kept dragging Arthur into shit, he wasn’t mentally stable enough for. Putting thoughts of rejecting Linda into Arthur’s head, by talking bad about Linda and making jokes about her any given time.

Sleeping with Lizzie over and over again, even when he knew she loved him and when she tried to get over him by dating someone new, he made the order to burn down the pub of Angel, humilated his family, and have him killed later.

Sleeping with Jessie, so he could use her

Humiliate Polly, when she was at her lowest, after Rueben had left her

Drag Michael into the illegal business after Polly begged him not to

Dragging Finn into all this shit after John died, because John wasn’t avaiable anymore

Calling Grace a whore, when they first met

Paying Lizzie in his head, even after she stopped being a sex worker

Helping a fascist

I could go on for a while, but you see my point here!

All the people I ship romantically with this character

Nobody! I want to see him miserable and alone! Honestly I’m never going to read all these soft!Tommy fics or whatever, because they really don’t interest me. I don’t want to see him happy.

But go have fun people and write and read whatever you want!

My non-romantic OTP for this character

Tommy and Lizzie, because they have a sexual relationship, which is not based on romance and I love this sad and depressing dynamic between them. It’s so interesting to write and read about.

Tommy and Ada are great in the show. I love their talks and Ada actually points out when Tommy is acting like a douche again.

My unpopular opinion about this character

I have a lot... where should I start?

I get so annoyed, when I see Tommy shown as a twink, because the actor is just 1,70m... which is not small to me. I know a lot of men around that height and I think they are average and not small. Also a lot of men feel bad for not being tall enough, because everywhere in our society it’s normal to have a tall man and a small woman. And the way tall man or small man are sexualized in this alpha/omega thing or in a top/bottom dynamic is so... meh. It’s really uncomfortable to see how people try to push the patriarchal man-woman dynamic into same-sex relationships.

Tommy is a class traitor and a horrible husband.

Man, I could rant for hours, but I stop right here. Just remember, please don’t feel attacked, I don’t mean to attack you. Even if you write or draw... whatever with Tommy, I would never say something bad about this. Enjoy creating Tommy content, I will love to ignore it!

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

I was so disappointed when they killed Freddie, because those two could have had an interesting and compelling relationship. Freddie could have been a great frenemie. I put this here and on on Ada, because their marriage wouldn’t changed the plot as much as Freddies and Tommys friendship. Tommy would have been a way better person, if Freddie was around.

John Shelby

How I feel about this character

MY HUSBAND! I love him and he has never done anything wrong in his life.

Nah, John has many faults, but I still adore him as a character, because his faults are actually making the plot more interesting. I also read, that he and Tommy fight a lot, because John is more moral and has way more integrity than his older brother. It was just hinted in the show, but I love this side fact and I will base my whole characterisation this.

I love to write, draw and read stuff with him. He is my favorite character from Peaky blinders and my love will never die, even though he did.

Funny tho, when I first watched PB, I adored Tommy and was annoyed by John, but as I rewatched it I changed my mind about those two.

He had so much potential and I would spend all my money, which is not much, but the devotions counts, to see a spin-off with just John and his army of children.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

Esme, because they are sooo cute together!

My OFC, because I love writing them.

Any reader, because I’m a sucker for John.

My non-romantic OTP for this character

All kinds of interactions with other characters and John are great! My favorite is John and Ada to be honest. But here are other dynamics I adore as well:

John & Polly, (she would help him a lot with the kids)

John & Arthur (they come to the garrison to drink and play cards, they talk a lot about their problems, deep bond here)

John & Tommy (in my head they are always fighting)

John & Lizzie, because they have a great friendship, and they helped each other a lot. She spend time with the kids and he gave her financial support, so she would quit her job, which she didn’t do, because she feared being all alone again, and she has trust issues) (I’m actually writing a fic about these two)

John & his kids (I’m soft for dad!John)

John & Michael (especially in season three, because John seems to be jealous of Michael)

My unpopular opinion about this character

John is not completely stupid. Well, he is certainly not smart, but he works in the betting shop, and Arthur does not, or not really, because Arthur is bad at math... John at least knows his numbers. And also Tommy chose him to be the legal bookie over the others, so John must do a good job there. He just never got a degree or something similar like Michael. Which is also a reason, why John seems to be bitter about Michael joining the business. Michael was put in a higher position than he did.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

This one is obvious... John should have survived.

[monsterkitties]

please talk more abt ur simpsons self insert im in love

OK THIS WAS SENT SO LONG AGO AND NOBODY TOLD ME NOT EVEN TUMBLAR AM SORREY :(

so hihi hello im SO FRICKING!!! glad (and surprised!!!!!) you are interested in my lore. i must say though that i have much to share story wise because my brain thinks about 15 different things at once. by the time i go to bed it feels like ive been awake for TWO days instead of one

 my. SIMPSONA as the kids might say. is seraph ✨✨ short for seraphiael, and other shorthands for this name include serapheme, seraf, serif, cera, sera, etc. he/she/they/it is an angel! he sounds like LESLIE JORDAN and he looks like;

this! :3 (did nt draw that little headshot; thats a credit to eggvvhore, right there, it is) his design has changed a lot from the first drawing i posted of ‘im though BUT is technically still canon because he DOES dress like that and he DOES have longer hair which he eventually cuts and it starts to curl at the ends and then hes just got a lil poff 🌨️🌨️ :3

story stuff under a cut becauseeeeee its so self indulgent and kinda long lol

so basically reverend lovejoy is a fallen angel/not technically a demon since he hasnt died and gone to hell and hes so pissed off about god that hes like “fuck this im gonna kill your followers bitch” so like 200 years after hes fallen he starts murdering christians lowkey over the years BUT ONLY AFTER they commit a sin so he knows for SURE they’re going to hell instead of heaven

hes chilling in european parts of the world mostly at first since they love jesus the most and then when american happens, he jumps his ass right on that boat and he moves all across the bible belt for like 300 years UNTIL the 1970s when he meets helen and is like aw fuck yes oh my god holy shit finally someone who GETS me. i will marry you immediately so we can be best friends forever (eventually it evolves to something more romantic but this is how it starts out)

SO THEY MOVE TO SPRINGFIELD (and in this canon i share with two, technically three, other friends of mine, springfield is a fucked up town where like time froze at some point or some shit idk im not the friend that works on that LOL thats Shattered Man Jokis’ job)

so at this point lovejoy has been on earth for 700 years total and that equals 7 days in heaven! so hes been gone a whole week.

god like, looks down at the earth, he’s doing a routine check, whatever, HE SEES LOVEJOY AND HE’S LIKE. OHHH MY GOD HOW DID I NOT NOTICE THIS FUCKING MENACE IS SO CLOSE TO MY MOST LOYAL IDIOT SUCKER NED FLANDER (lovejoy is definitely planning to kill flanders) so he sends his highest ranking most powerful angel possible to kill him before he kills ned (this wasnt a decision on my part, i just looked up the name seraphiel and apparently thats literally the name of the prince of angels so i was like. ok i guess this guy is prince bitch)

preface; god is an asshole. hes just an asshole. he gets all his power from the worship people give him and his angels are powerful because halos are something that literally gives the angel connection to god’s power and also connect them to a constant stream of god’s thoughts so instantly they know exactly what he wants done at any time (halos can be broken or ripped off; breaking them allows the connection to fade away which still leaves you with abilities for quite a little while after but ripping it off severs your connection permanently and removes almost all magical properties and is EXTREMELY painful. this is reserved for angels who have been banished from heaven USUALLY)

preface 2; after falling lovejoy’s only supernatural qualities he’s retained after so long are MINOR EXTREMELY minor shapeshifting and he’s crazy strong (his str + def are sososo high but nothing else really lol)

so seraph gets there, lovejoy immediately knows who he is, they get into an anime fight because those are my favorite types of fights, destroying everything wow awesome big huge and then somehow its fine three days later

seraph loses! because i think lovejoy is just that determined about not dying + he has plot armor, and they fight a couple more times, and seraph loses some more, so seraf’s like FUCK this i guess. and just decides to literally stalk the shit out of reverend to make sure he doesnt kill anyone else (”YOU COULD HAVE JUST LET ME KILL YOU BUT NOOOOOOW I HAVE TO STAND HERE, RIGHT HERE, SEVEN FEET BEHIND YOU, FOREVER.”)

he really doesnt need to do this? but hes so so fucking mad that he couldnt kill lovejoy he’s like “i cannot go back to the Lord and be like. yeah i fucking failed” ARE YOU KIDDING HE’LL DIE. so instead he just intently follows lovejoys every move

eventually they form a relationship and then they kiss and then seraph and helen kiss and they all kiss and wow its content not for anything other than for me to be interested in. all of this is tailored to me bc i really liked lovejoys design/voice/personality and it spiraled from there :)

there’s more stuff after and even between this shit but it involves other peoples characters and this is already a lot SO if anyone is interested in our self indulgent little au? send another ask go right ahead 💖 id love to answerb

[fruitbur]

(bursts into inbox) thAT ASK MEME WITH ALL THE OCS U TAGGED (or just pick and choose but i genuinely would love to know all of them if u want afhdsgjsdhdjd) - darkwarfy

i'm going to start with the easy ones and end with the ones i haven't even talked about to you.

Red-

Full Name: Aaron Cupid Williams

Gender and Sexauilty: Male (trans) and Demisexual

Pronouns: He/Him

Ethnicity/Species: Tribrid of Fae, WARLOCK, and Demon.

Birthplace and Birthdate: His birthplace is unknown to HIM so therefore it won't be stated. he was born on Halloween but the year is also unknown.

Guilty Pleasures: Dancing and Singing. his mother never allowed him to do anything fun when he lived with her (besides reading) so he hides that side of him.

Phobias: Spiders, water, and the dark.

What They Would Be Famous For: besides being the only one of his kind? his singing, there is just something about it.. i wonder what?

What They Would They Be Arrested For: destroying prisons and freeing wrongly captured supernaturals.

OC You Ship Them With: No one, Red is too young to date throughout most of the stories he is in.

OC Most Likely To Murder Them: Iris (his mom) or Icarus

Favorite Movie/Book Genre: Favorite movie would be Shark Boy and Lava Girl, he loves kids movies. Book genre is sci-fi or adventure stories.

Least Favorite Movie/Book Cliche: For movies it has to Coraline and book cliche is the hero or hero's lover/bestfriend dying for the greater good.

Talents and/or Powers: Talents would be as i said before his dancing and singing. his powers? jesus Red has a LOT. He can do basic magic, he can light himself on fire in a blue magic flame before it spreads around himself. telepathy, teleportation, and "invisibility" (that's more lore stuff) not really a power but he can control his appearance (his was born with baby blue skin and light purple hair but his mother taught him to hide that side to blend in with humans) he has a ribbon spell that he can call them to wrap his wrists and his controls them (i.e pulling and wrapping up his targets) he has another spell that does the same thing called flower power (this with rose vines) that he uses to hurt someone if need be. okay this is getting too long but he has more.

Why Someone Might Love Them: He is such a sweet kid and lights up the rooms he is in. you can't help but love him.

Why Someone Might Hate Them: Red can be a little troublemaker and cause chaos for fun. which gets annoying when shit goes down.

How They Change: Red always thought he was just a weapon, a tool for a war that was never coming. as he grows up and lives on his own with Angel, he changes to be someone full of love for not just others, but himself.

Why You Love Them: Red was my first ever OC. He has been through so much changes and growth and i think i finally love him as he is now.

Angel - (i'm gonna shorten the questions so this doesn't get too long)

Full Name: Nope- that's lore and i wanna tell you that Later.

Gender: Female (Trans), Lesbian.

Pronouns: she/her

Ethnicity/Species: loosely based on the mayans, a necromancer, and a clockwork angel necklace.

Birthplace: Her village in that universe's Tulum. Birthdate... she's existed for over 2000 years, who knows how old she is truly.

Guilty Pleasures: Gardening and painiting.

Phobias: the water. just- the water.

Famous For: bringing the dead back to life with ease.

Arrested For: Killing witches who mess with Red.

OC Shipped: I ship her with Niko, two crazy girls who just want bodies.

OC Murder: Iris again, or Lexi (not doing her, she isn't too important rn)

Favorite Movie/Book Genre: she doesn't watch movies that often because she is ya know.. trapped. but when Red can watch something other than kids movies, Angel finds herself loving romance movies, hasn't picked a favorite yet. Books though? cook books! she enjoys learning about food even though she can't eat.

Least Favorite: Horror, just like Red. or anything with water. nothing against mermaids or wildlife, but she's seen enough of the sea for 10 lifetimes at least. Cliche would be evil necromancers, screw that.

Talents: Her painting are to die for. powers??? now this is going to be fun. Angel can bring back the dead, use her magic to move things and grab people. over the course of her time trapped, she has learned how to possess whomever wears her, which leads to some fun beat downs with both Red and Angel working as a single unit. oh did i mention Angel really loves to mess around with blood magic? she was the only one who was able to master it before the witches attacked.

Love Them: Someone would love her becauss how passionate and nurturing she is. also because she enjoys cracking jokes in the safety of the clockwork during the WORST of times.

Hate Them: the witches hated her for her powers and that she was "sick" in the head for enjoying blood magic.

How They Change: Angel had to learn to live as a soul for so long, slowly forgetting what it means to be a living person, that has to be bad for her mental health.

Love Them 2: Angel has become one of my favorites because of how much i've put thought into who she is.

Niko -

Name: she still hasn't came up with a last name, might just take Angel's :)

Gender and Sexuality: Nonbinary and pansexul

Pronouns: she/her

Ethnicity/Species: Biracial, Japanse and Guyanese, a life sized Drawing Mannequin.

Birthplace: a black market factory that makes life sized objects to be used by witches. Birthdate, before 2016, at least.

Guilty Pleasures: ripping the skin off of witches for shit and giggles. oh and grooming dogs!

Phobias: none, nothing phases her.

Famous for: her spine chilling laugh.

Arrested for: all the murders she's done, that is, if she was ever caught.

OC Shipped: Angel of course.

OC Murder: any and all witches, Lexi, Syd.

Favorite Movie/Book: nope and nope! too busy living in the moment to sit down in one place, besides not have real hands. so the next question is useless.

Talents: is flawlessly ripping skin off of a living person a talent? Niko would say so. besides just living, Niko can change her shape into any type of doll/mannequin drawing or otherwise to hide in stores.

Love Them: she is a funny gal! creepy as shit but loyal once you've gained her trust.

Hate Them: "she. skins. people." -Syd at least 20 times.

How They Change: goes from a manic doll to a somewhat a stable person with the power of lOvE.

Love Them 2: She is perfect for Angel and that's enough for me.

Trinity -

Name: Trinity Wither Lakes

Gender: Female, Bisexual.

Pronouns: she/her.

Eithnicity/Species: Biracial, Polynesian, and African American. Werewolf and Siren.

Birthplace: Kaneohe, Hawaii. 3/17/1999.

Guilty Pleasures: Running in the woods in the middle of the night.

Phobias: being half wolf, she fears anything with silver, oh and blood.

Famous for: her speed.

Arrested for: graffiti and other forms of vandalism.

OC Shipped: Abigail. (not doing her either, sorry!)

OC Murder: Lexi, Raph, her grandparents.

Favorite Movie: Twilight and The Twilight Saga. she loves quoting the movies and books to piss everyone off, making it her favorites. Cliche would enimes to lovers.

Least Favorite: The Princess Bride, she just doesn't Get It. Cliche would be anything with angry werewolves or evil sirens. "we aren't your tropes, humans" -Trinity everytime she reads or watches something with a sexy but evil siren.

Talents: all the perks of being wolf and siren, nothing to add really.

Love Them: she is headstrong and makes for a good leader for a rebellion.

Hate Them: too loud, doesn't back down from a fight. will not shut up if someone is wronging her in public.

Change: she goes from the sheltered girl from her family's home in California to the loud rebel in Texas.

Love Them 2: Trin is like me, i don't know when to quit. if someone wrongs me i will scream it from the roof tops before i let them get away with it.

Syd -

Name: Syd Brimstone Lockwood

Gender: Female, Bisexual.

Pronouns: she/her

Ethnicity/Species: Caucasian, human.

Birthplace: Boston, Massachuestts. 4/20/1999

Guilty Pleasures: shitty reality tv, she lives for the drama. also magic, she has always been skeptical of the existence of magic so she spends much of her time researching and tracking down sightings of magic usage.

Phobias: None that i can think of.

Famous for: her deadpan delivery and humor/her resting bitch face.

Arrested for: stalking "known" supernaturals.

OC Shipped: Ainsel.

OC Murder: anyone who she follows would kill her, mainly Lexi or Raph though.

Favorite Movie: IT (2017) or a Purge movie. favorite cliche would be any boring, human trope. so like a coffee shop au.

Least Favorite: Harry Potter (okay she really enjoys the third one but she'd never admit it), cliche, would be magic. (she doesn't hate it, just that she doesn't believe.)

Talents: breaking and entering. "that's a fucking talent and you know it, Ains! i've never been caught in my life." -Syd. she is human so no powers.

Love Them: over protective of the ones she loves. would fight anyone to save Ainsel and she'd win.

Hate Them: her skepticism makes it hard for her to make friends and tears groups apart.

Change: after she meets a certain someone, she finally lets go of her overbearing skepticism and borderline hatred.

Love Them 2: i just love her character.

Ainsel -

Name: Ainsel Raven James

Gender: Female (Trans), Asexaul.

Pronouns: she/her.

Ethnicity/Species: African American (she has albinism), human.

Birthplace: Middletown, New York. 5/18/2002.

Guilty Pleasures: painting on herself, walking in the rain with no umbrella.

Phobias: fire. "You can't control it Sy-Sy!!! what if you drop that match huh?! we could go up in flames! i don't want to burn away!"

Famous For: her looks, or her happy go lucky nature.

Arrested For: Jay walking to get away from a monster or someone chasing her and Syd.

OC Shipped: Syd.

OC Murder: Lexi or Raph.

Favorite Movie: Tangled. Cliche, a happy ending.

Least Favorite: Monty Python and The Holy Grail. Cliche, a dog dying.

Talents: Her impeccable timing, always seeming to get Syd out of trouble before she is caught. "Nuh uh! none of that miss "breaking and entering!"" -Ainsel. Again a human so no powers.

Love Them: her optimism and acceptance of magic and the supernatural. how she loves everyone so fiercely and stands for what is right.

Hate Them: how happy and full of light she seems to be.

Change: She starts to stick up for herself more and learns how to fight back.

Love Them 2: i love how happy she is, i want to be that comfortable in my own skin like her.

Sebastain -

Name: Sebastain A. Montague

Gender: Male, Aromantic, Asexaul.

Pronouns: he/him.

Ethnicity/Species: Caucasian, Vampire and Sorcerer.

Birthplace: Venice, Italy. 7/25/1462

Guilty Pleasures: Ballroom Dancing. Drinking straight from the pulse.

Phobias: the sun, even if he can walk in the daylight.

Famous For: his charm and "naturally" good looks.

Arrested For: a string of murders in the east coast of the US.

OC shipped: no one, the only thing close to a relationship he has is his friendship with Red long into the future.

OC Murder: Syd tries, but she finds it's hard to kill something already dead.

Favorite Movie: he has lived for so long, he finds his memories are better than what you'll find in those picture shows. he does enjoy reading poems by Edgar Allan Poe or any of Dickinson's works. (skipping the next question)

Talents: Dancing and cooking. Powers, compulsion (vampire mind control), and the basic skillsets a sorcerer has.

Love Them: his charm, though their love is misplaced, is appreciated.

Hate Them: he is a world class bastard who knows how to use his charms to get what he wants, you.

Change: He learns to be nicer to people and not view them as just a food source.

Love Them 2: he is one cocky bastard but i wouldn't trade him for any other bitch out there.

Irri -

Name: Iradeseca the Faithful

Gender: Genderfluid, pansexual. (in a poly relationship).

Pronouns: any, but mainly goes by she/her.

Ethnicity/Species: she's.. she's an alien boss. (oqjsgsyisha) anyways she is from a race called The Marked Ones. i'll tell you all about them soon. Irri is of the Shifter classification, and is the last pure blood shifter left.

Birthplace: their (the girlfriends/partners) home planet, in the palace of the shifters. (no date because lore reasons, this will be the same for her girlfriends.)

Guilty Pleasures: her partners 😏

Phobias (more like fears): explosions, drowning, losing her girlfriends.

Famous For: her shifting ability.

Arrested For: well... L O R E

OC Shipped: Betrix, Calenni, and Desa.

OC Murder: lore

They are aliens, so i'm skipping these questions.

Talents: her speed. she is a shifter, so she can shape shift into her true form (a ice fox) and into her more humanesque form. (having two arms and two legs)

Love Them: her mysterious but gentle presence

Hate Them: her special skill and the fact she is dating Calenni and Desa in particular.

Change: Irri changes from being controlled by an oppressive regime.

Love Them 2: She is my second oldest oc, she will always have a special place in my heart.

Betrix -

Name: The Stoic Betrix

Gender: Genderfluid, pansexaul. (in a poly relationship)

Pronouns: she/her or he/him.

Ethnicity/Species: The Marked Ones, Bender classification.

Birthplace: on their home planet, in a abandoned temple of the benders.

Guilty Pleasures: smiling and being happy.

Phobias: being alone and losing his girlfriends.

Famous For: her calm, unphased demeanor.

Arrested For: same reason as Irri and Desa.

OC Shipped: Irri, Calenni, and Desa.

OC Murder: WOAH WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT, LORE!!!

Talents: being able to take everything thrown at him without saying a word (punches, kicks, fire, etc etc). bending people in half without moving a muscle. being a bender means she can bend spaces and minds with no difficulty, leading him to control the person's mind.

Love Them: No matter what happens to her, Betrix always gets back up with twice the amount of power and the same amount of complaints, zero. a man of little words unless he is with his partners.

Hate Them: WHY WON'T SHE STAY DOWN? STOP FIGHTING ALREADY!!! dating Calenni and Desa

Change: Betrix learns how to open up more and use her words because she is allowed to speak.

Love Them 2: She is a badass. who needs to speak when you can just knock the asshole over with one push.

Calenni -

Name: Calenni the Creative

Gender: Genderfluid and pansexual. (in a poly relationship)

Pronouns: she/her and sometimes called they/them by Betrix.

Ethnicity/Species: The Marked Ones, Creator classification.

Birthplace: On their home planet, on her family's estate.

Guilty Pleasures: being taken care of, not always the one leading things.

Phobias: bugs, filith, losing her partners.

Famous For: looking like a flower or a tiny pixie creature.

Arrested for: nothing because of lore reeasons

OC Shipped: Irri, Betrix, and Desa.

OC Murder: lore.

Talents: everything she creates is one of a kind and priceless. She is a creator so she is able to make whatever comes to mind with just a tap of her fingers. and is always changing how she appearance due to creating new shapes and forms.

Love Them: she speaks out against what was happening with the creators and risked her lives for her partners, nearly dying for them.

Hate Them: didn't sit back and be the little princess she was supposed to.

Change: learned how to be independent while being able to depend on her loves.

Love Them 2: Calenni said eat the rich even if that means eat me too.

Desa -

Name: Desa the Kind

Gender: Genderfluid and pansexual (in a poly relationship)

Pronouns: any but mainly she/her.

Ethnicity/Species: The Marked Ones, Destroyer classification.

Birthplace: on their home planet, in the woods far away from civilization.

Guilty Pleasures: creating stuff!!! being able to just live and feel love and acceptance.

Phobias: destroying the ones she loves. being alone, losing her partners.

Famous For: being understanding and not judgmental.

Arrested for: lore- but also just for being caught with Calenni.

OC Shipped: Irri, Betrix, Calenni.

OC Murder: lore, but anyone but her partners.

Talents: Her forgiveness. Being able to destroy whole planets by just being on them. Detroyers can eliminate anything in their paths with little to no struggle.

Love Them: ??? what is not to love??? she is such a friggin sweetheart who wants to spend all eternity with her sweethearts.

Hate Them: being born.

Change: girl has it ROUGH let me tell you. but in the end it'll all work out and a much happier, healthier Desa will make it out on the other side.

Love Them 2: "all i want is to love what i can not destroy with a single touch, then and only then, i'll be at peace" -Desa.

BONUS!!!! BONUS ROUND!!!!

Iris -

Name: Iris the Lurer

Gender: Female and Straight (😔)

Pronouns: she/her

Ethnicity/Species: Greater Demon (dark gray/light purple complexion)

Birthplace: in the demon realm, before mankind was created.

Guilty Pleasures: using her kids as weapons to orchestrate a war. oh and 90 Day Fiance on TLC.

Phobias: love and weakness from her children.

Famous For: her natural rainbow hair.

Arrested For: mass genocide.

OC Shipped: Icarus (two slimey bastards)

OC Murder: ANGEL AND RED LIKE THE BAD BITCHES THEY ARE 😤💯

Favorite Movie: The Birdcage. Cliche would be main villainess destroying the land.

Least Favorite: The Hunger Games. "so over rated and boring CGI, why do humans enjoy this?" -Iris

Talents: being the worst mother alive, making your child into a monstrosity to benefit your delusions. her powers are mostly mental manipulation and normal demon theatrics.

Love Them: being confident, commanding, and full of herself.

Hate Them: everything she has ever done after breaking free from the demon realm with Icarus.

Change: maybe if she gets murdered she'll finally change.

Love Them 2: i like working with a villain, morally gray character like her.

THIS TOOK ALL DAY WOANSGEUOWMSB I HAVEN'T LEFT THIS TAB ALL DAY.

[johannesviii]

Top 10 Personal Favorite Hit Songs from 2005

16 to 17 years old. Finished public highschool, started public university in September. Looking back at 2003-2005 feels like looking at ten years of my life condensed in three. Exhausting.

Also we’re now past the halfway point of these lists! And this is another exceptionally good year for hits.

Disclaimers:

Keep in mind I’m using both the year-end top 100 lists from the US and from France while making these top 10 things. There’s songs in English that charted in my country way higher than they did in their home countries, or even earlier or later, so that might get surprising at times.

Of course there will be stuff in French. We suck. I know. It’s my list. Deal with it.

My musical tastes have always been terrible and I’m not a critic, just a listener and an idiot.

I have sound to color synesthesia which justifies nothing but might explain why I have trouble describing some songs in other terms than visual ones.

So I finished highschool that year. I met my best friend ever in late 2004 and we even had some sort of small crew back then! I had a bit of a crush on her but alas it wasn’t meant to be. I don’t know who invented the term ‘friendzone’ but they got its meaning completely wrong because staying friends basically forever with someone you love can be a fantastic thing. Things weren’t rosy nor perfect that year, of course, and I still was miserable at home, but I’m not sure where I’ll be today without her. She's amazing and she still lives nearby nowadays. Shoutout: if you read this, E., you pretty much saved my life.

I was still making tapes and burning CDs, still using my trusty portable cd player, and always listening to stuff while drawing during recess, sitting in a corner and doodling stuff in my sketchbook on the floor like a weird gangly goblin.

I had already started to buy Rock Mag in August 2004 but it really became my monthly ritual in 2005, and it lasted until autumn 2007. A reliable source of posters to cover my walls. At that point they were almost completely covered with paintings, drawings, torn pages from magazines and posters of Linkin Park, Mylène Farmer, Placebo and Indochine.

I also had a better access to the family computer and was a bit more involved online. Might explain why the number of singles I was buying plummeted.

It’s time once again for some (ok, many) honorable mentions!

Beverly Hills (Weezer) - I don’t even know why I like this but I do.

Bouger Bouger (Magic System) - I never understood why it was cool to make fun of these guys in my country. Their music is so happy and fun.

Holiday (Green Day) - My brother loved that band and listened to it a lot, and I was 100% fine with that.

Wake Me Up When September Ends (Green Day) - See above.

Gabriel (Najoua Belyzel) - That is so-bad-it’s-good at its finest right here.

Candy Shop (50 Cents) - As a sucker for terrible puns (HA, get it?? I’m sorry I’ll get out immediately) I can’t help it, I love this.

Love Generation (Bob Sinclar) - Stay tuned for more of this guy on another list.

Listen to Your Heart (DHT) - The original is better, but it was really nice to hear that again on the radio.

We Be Burnin’ (Sean Paul) - Not my favorite but still damn good.

Bad Day (Daniel Powter) - I even bought the single. What can I say except “relatable”.

All About Us (Tatu) - I bought that single as well. Almost made the list.

Le Bateau Blanc (Karol) - The last cut from the list. Not even kidding at all. I’m still not sure if Keane deserves to be on the list more than this to be honest.

Like it happened previously with Placebo not being elligible at all, it is a complete outrage that Precious by Depeche Mode isn’t elligible for this list. Like, what the f█ck. Playing the Angel was one of the defining albums of the year to me. I’m not even sure it would have topped the list, maybe #2, but it still feels wrong.

There’s another band who’s complete absence from this top feels kinda painful to me, considering how much I loved their new album at the time. Indeed, no single from Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge by My Chemical Romance is elligible for this list, and it feels wrooooong, man. I love I’m not okay and especially Thank You For the Venom, but even Helena would have been nice. Alas, it wasn’t meant to be.

For some unfathomable reason, Get The Party Started (Pink) and, even more unexplainable, Do You Really Want to Hurt Me (Culture Club) recharted in France in 2005 and both made the year-end top 100. The fact they are both elligible but all the stuff mentioned above this paragraph isn’t makes no sense whatsoever.

And now, the actual list!

10 - Everybody’s Changing (Keane)

US: Not on the list / FR: #48

Pretty great even though it’s not my favorite Keane song. That would be Crystal Ball. It’s fantastic and as a person who is scared, above all, by existential horror, the music video is terrifying. Sadly, it’s not elligible for my 2006 list, so Everybody’s Changing will have to be its slightly less good proxy for 2005.

9 - Et Si En Plus Ya Personne (Alain Souchon)

US: Not on the list / FR: #100

This has to be the most borderline non-elligible song ever put on one of my lists. But I’m glad it is still elligible. Remember the song on the 1993 list that I called an “anticapitalist ballad”? Well that’s the same guy. And this time it’s a song about how religion can cause both beautiful things and war, and how “the sky might be empty” because of us. It’s great. Here’s a translation. You’re welcome.

8 - F█ck Them All (Mylène Farmer)

US: Not on the list / FR: #62

Aaaaaaaaand unfortunately for everyone including myself, she’s back. Not her best song by a mile (told you it was all downhill after C’est Une Belle Journée didn’t I), but still pretty damn good, and that music video where she’s destroying bird-like scarecrows is amazing so here’s a bonus gif.

7 - Boulevard of Broken Dreams (Green Day)

US: #7 / FR: Not on the list

My brother LOVED this band and listened to it SO MUCH. And yeah, they were very good and that song might just be my favorite one from them. I don’t have much more to say about it, you all know it already. Let’s move on.

6 - Sugar We’re Going Down (Fall Out Boy)

US: #40 / FR: Not on the list

Again, it feels wrong that both Fall Out Boy AND Panic! at the Disco were elligible for this list but not My Chemical Romance. I was never a fan of these two acts, at all, and their supposed rivalry was kinda hilarious to watch from afar. With a bucket of popcorn. While listening to Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge and nodding sadly, of course.

This is still a great song, mind you.

5 - Feel Good Inc (Gorillaz)

US: #37 / FR: Not on the list (really? wtf happened)

Again, I live with someone who loves Gorillaz, so I claim overexposure.

It’s still #5 on a list based on a very, very good year.

That’s quality for you.

4 - Speed of Sound (Coldplay)

US: #57 / FR: Not on the list

A new chapter in the ascension of Coldplay from “Johannes hates this band” to “this is one of the best mainstream bands we have”. An epic saga, years in the making, and Speed of Sound was basically the last scene of Act One. Not my favorite song from X&Y (that would be Talk), but still really good. Hell, I even bought the single, and goodness knows I wasn’t buying a lot of singles anymore in 2005.

Holy shit, half of these are Benassi Bros garbage. None of them are elligible, though! Dodged a bullet there, didn’t I.

3 - Numb/Encore (JayZ + Linkin Park)

US: #93 / FR: #75

What a blessed mashup. For a few magical months in 2005, all the punk goth kids and the hiphop kids were united under this song’s banner and it felt like world peace had been achieved. It could have pissed off everybody but no! Everyone loved it instead!

“But Johannes, this is just Numb all over again with different lyrics. You can’t keep putting Linkin Park at the top of your lists forever.” Sadly no, I can’t. I know. It’s only #3. Don’t yell at me. Also, the next two songs are genuinely better, at least in my opinion!

2 - Lift Me Up (Moby)

US: Not on the list / FR: #31

I heard this on the radio and bought the album, Hotel, on the grounds that Natural Blues from 2000 was one of my favorite songs ever and than it wouldn’t hurt to actually own an album of that guy after all that time (”all that time” being only five years, but please keep in mind the past three years had felt like ten, and in my mind, they still do ; trauma is one hell of a thing). And a couple of days later that year, we went to Disneyland for my brother’s birthday, and I only had a small bag that could contain my cd player, and the earphones and nothing else. So I could only put one cd in it and that was it.

So I picked Hotel, and I basically retreated inside of it whenever my mother was starting to talk aggressively, which happened a lot in the various queues. So in the end, I listened to that cd a LOT that day and every single time, it would calm me while still being energetic enough to keep me enthusiastic for the various Disneyland rides.

Lift Me Up is energetic but cold, aerial but distant, uplifting but sinister. It was the perfect song for someone who was, at the time, trying to tone down their aggressivity and anger and trying to be masculine but in a softer way, while still staying themselves and not giving up the fight. I absolutely adore this song. It’s perfect.

It instantly joined my list of favorite songs ever that year.

1 - Mr Brightside (The Killers)

US: #16 / FR: Not on the list (this feels so wrong)

If I had to make a top ten of the hits of that entire decade, this would be #2. No debate whatsoever.

Because holy shit.

I was already sold on that band after hearing Somebody Told Me on the radio, which sadly isn’t elligible for this list (I instantly loved it, first because it was catchy as hell, but also because I love the chorus “Well somebody told me you had a boyfriend / Who looked like a girlfriend / That I had in February of last year", because as you already know I tend to be extremely literal minded and my immediate conclusion was “wow you two dated the same trans guy before and after he was out of the closet” and that was highkey relatable and no you can’t change my mind). So I bought the album about two weeks after, mostly blind, because the cd store was playing it and also because Rock Mag said it was great.

That was an understatement. Hot Fuss is one of the best albums of the entire decade and you probably know that already. The first song, Jenny Was a Friend of Mine, floored me right after putting the cd in the player and it felt like the album already reached its peak and there were still 12 tracks after that.

The very next track was Mr. Brightside. And. How do I put this.

There’s like a dozen interpretations possible for this song, and most of them are something like “this guy is so anxious and paranoid he’s gonna break up with this girl because he keeps imagining her cheating with another guy and it might not even be real.”

Now might be a good moment to remind you that at the time, I had a crush on my best friend, and was still firmly in the closet. And this song starts, as everyone knows, with “Coming out of my cage and I've been doing just fine“.

So... yeah. This is the song that accidentally convinced me the closet sucked and did nothing to deter bullies anyway, and that after more than three years of feeling mostly miserable, I should try to be myself and screw the consequences. I know it wasn’t the original intention behind that song. But still.

Godspeed, The Killers. I owe you one, guys.

Next up: Still not able to put Indochine nor Placebo on a list, OP is this close to punching a wall

[edh-a-to-z]

Best of 2018 - Uncommons

Lets dig into some real EDH meat - some Uncommons!

I’ll pick the best uncommon by set, and rattle off some of my other picks to add to your EDH collection.

From Rivals of Ixalan

Ravenous Chupacabra

This has been made a great showing in Standard and Limited. It makes a great creature in EDH, comparable with Nekrataal, with an ability to hit different things for a weaker combat body - in my opinion, it’s even better.

Notable for doing good work in Alesha decks.

Aquatic Incursion - Great for Merfolk tribal decks. Helps Curiosity effects or Voltron damage

Atzocan Seer - Dino tribal support, with recursion and mana fixing. Solid uncommon

Forerunner of the X - Merfolk, Pirate, Vampire, Dinosaur support, each synergizing well with the tribe

Legion Lieutenant, Merfolk Mistbinder - More tribal support

Thrashing Brontodon - A solidly build 3 drop, with the ability to act like Naturalize when needed

Now for my picks of Dominaria

Cast Down 

Nothing like that sweet, sweet, 2 Mana Black removal. From the likes of old Terror to faves like Doom Blade, sacrificing options for cheaper kill spells gives black one heck of an edge.

Basically Every Legendary - Most of them are real interesting, promoting a build-around-me strategy. Yargle, memes aside, is lame, and Garna is underwhelming, but they all have solid potential as commanders, and most have some role in 1 of the 99

Dauntless Bodyguard - Can act as a walking totem armor, and can easily be recurred by almost any low level Rez ability (like Alesha)

Fungal Plots - If ya ain’t using the corpses, make ‘em mulch. With the added benefit of another use for Saproling tokens, this is a great addition to any Saproling tribal deck. Personally I still prefer Nightsoil

Jhoira’s Familiar - Styled like a Planeshift familiar, this can be even more useful - makes it easier to cast your commander, works for artifact tribal - a nice solid role.

Goblin Warchief - A nice reprint that makes a great addition to any Goblin tribal deck

Merfolk Trickster - Flash in, neuter a creature. And probably follow up with a removal spell. Buh bye indestructible.

Settle the Score - Removal. A bit pricey, but if you’re running a superfriends deck, it might be interesting.

Song of Freyalise - For a go-wide deck, this is a nice ramp option which makes everything into a Llanowar Elves. 

The Eldest Reborn - Nice circular removal, forced discard (not so powerful), and a great Rez affect that hits anything.

Time of Ice - If you have a deck that can actively tap creatures, this can be a soft board removal.

The Multiplayer oriented set of Battlebond had a lot of fun mechanics, hopefully they get picked up again to make a bigger splash in EDH.

Fumble

The ultimate anti-Voltron tech. You play with enough people, this can hit. The biggest difficulty of using it is that any creature that you throw two or more Auras or Equipments on, will probably have some form of protection, so the likes of Arcane Lighthouse or Glaring Spotlight can help out.

Beast Within - A great color pie break, this lets Green decks deal with anything. A 3/3 Creature in a multiplayer format is far less threatening than in other formats.

Cheering Fanatic - Lets you power out anything one turn faster. The ability to choose as it attacks is phenomenal - I originally expected it to have to be named as it was played and never changed.

Oreskos Explorer - Lets you play catchup when you’ve missed land drops, or someone has been landramping. Allowing you to pick Plains can let you mana fix with dual lands.

Out of Bounds - You only have U? Maybe you can team up to play this with a friends help. If someone is comboing off, you’re all on the same side!

Swords to Plowshares - You play white, you play this. 

Unflinching Courage - A humble but solid aura, useful in most any Selesnya deck

Veteran Explorer - If everyone ramps, but you have things to do with all that mana, it helps you the most. Woohoo!

A return to Core Sets was much desired. M19 delivered more than we hoped for IMO.

Mirror Image

Sometimes the best thing to Clone is what you brought to the table yourself. Or Clone a Clone of something you’ve already Cloned and control. A 1 mana discount makes it even more attractive.

Aether Tunnel - When it comes to Voltron, it’s Evasion, Evasion, Evasion

Draconic Disciple - Fixes your mana (especially useful in those 5C Dragon tribal decks), then becomes a 5/5 Dragon when you don’t need that anymore. Good early and good late.

Exclusion Mage - Man o War with better tribal tags

Psychic Corrosion - If you draw half your deck, they mill all of theirs. Works incremental and in bulk mill decks, which tend to draw anyway.

Reassembling Skeleton - Discard fodder, Sac bait, the possibilities are...not endless, but multitudinous 

Reclamation Sage - One of the best EDH tools. Naturalize on a 2/1 body for all your removal and recursion needs

Regal Bloodlord - Some possible usage in LG decks, especially like Karlov decks which focus on incremental lifegain. A small army of Bat tokens can always come in handy

Reliquary Tower - Unlimited hand size has some niche usage in draw heavy decks, and doesn’t really cost a deck slot if it replaces a Basic land.

Time for Guilds of Ravnica, and the best from among them!

Goblin Creatermaker

I love option!. Shock and Artifact+ removal are fantastic! Right power to be Tutored by Imperial Recruiter or Recruiter of the Guard, or Rez’d by Alesha, makes a great EDH utility creature.

Chemister’s Insight - Draw on an Instant is always usable, and doing it twice is great. Jump-Start is a better Retrace, and I love it.

Circuitous Route - A poor man’s ramp. Still, mana fixing!

Conclave Tribunal - An over priced Oblivion Ring with the benefit of Convoke, works great in some go-wide decks

Crush Contraband - feels like Return to Dust, and can make a good supplement to decks looking for that

Demotion - The ability to shut down Activated Abilities makes it interesting. Knocking out a blocker is just gravy

Golgari Findbroker - A poor man’s Eternal Witness. 

League Guildmage - Draw is a great mana dump, and getting a single Replicate option for R is pretty nice, especially for smaller CMC spells

Murmuring Mystic - Another Spellslinger tool, with better tokens than Young Pyromancer!

Sinister Sabotage - Mandatory Cancel replacement

Here’s my pick for the best of Ultimate Master’s Uncommons!

Angel of Despair

Removal is king in EDH. From board wipes, to specific answers, to counterspells, all of these have their place in a given EDH deck.

The ability to destroy any permanent, including Lands and Planeswalkers, really makes this a really great utility card. On top of a solid 5/5 flying body (worth about 5 mana) that removal is 2 mana, which is a good deal. Also one of my favorites targets in a Reanimator deck.

Anger and Brawn - Both of these have dropped to bulk prices thanks to the reprint, and make excellent buffs for many a deck

Apprentice Necromancer - Before last year, this risked going over $2. Thanks to a reprint here and in C17, new GY players have a cheap tool

Artisan of Kozilek - Another great eldrazi fatty, casting it (and not just from your hand, paying the cost, just casting it) also Rez’s another creature from your yard. A great 2 for 1!

Umbra - Boar and Snake - Both greath auras for Voltron, and any other deck

Buried Alive - Nice GY tutor. Cuz Entomb is still expensive.

Dawn Charm - A swiss army knife that was unbelivably originally printed at common. A three pronged 

Eternal Witness - New card, same power. Been a great card since Fifth Dawn, still great now

Fecundity - REPLACEMENTS! If you kill your own stuff the fastest, you get the most out of this

Young Pyromancer - Spellslinger classique!

Laboratory Maniac - A fun alt win con that needed a reprint

Masters 25 ... didn’t have a lot of great stuff, especially at uncommon.

The big champ to get reprinted was Ash Barrens. Goes in every multicolored deck, and needed a reprint to keep the price from C16 down.

Cursecatcher - If you’re in the market for a counterspell, this can do the job sometimes. 

Rancor - A great enchantment with evasion you can cast over and over again.

Willbender - A nominally useful Morph card

That’s all the uncommons for now! I’ll be back with the rares and mythics soon!

So long campers!

[de-boeldieu]

My Aviation Films List

I know some of you might be wondering why I did this to myself, and the answer is simple; I’m bored and I like movies, and I stumbled across so many films that I felt it was my duty to watch some regardless of quality. Oh boy did this prove to be a challenge.

There were a total of 22 movies on the list. Two films I was unable to watch Journey Together ( 1945 ) (anything on the film seemed to be lost, unfortunately), and a 30 minute Hitchcock French propaganda short called Bon Voyage ( 1944 ) (version I watched was slightly screwed up, and some of the English subtitles were translated incorrectly).

However, I was able to watch every other film on the list! Granted, completing this took a LOT longer than I anticipated.

I’m not quite sure how I should go about writing, but I suppose I will rank each film to my own personal opinions of what they were like, with a brief summary, and any small notes I had whilst watching. If you’d like a more in depth summary or any additional details I had while watching the film, ask me, or look the name up if it interests you.

Also I’d just like to say THANK YOU SO MUCH to anyone who takes the time to read some of these. You’re ace.

In order, from my favorite to least favorite:

1. La Grande Illusion ( 1937 )

Oooh my god you guys, this film made me cry so hard. Trust me, the dramatic music on the title card is there for a reason. A French film set in WWI, where French pilots get captured and sent to German POW camps where they make attempts to escape. It also has low key socialist sentiments. Some parts are a little cheesy because it’s a 30s film, but still amazing.

The only thing I was not terribly fond of was the last half hour or so, just really wasn’t my thing. But overall? Absolutely brilliant.

2. Dark Blue World ( 2001 )

A Czech film about two WWII Czech RAF pilots and their friendship, both loving the same woman. This one will also make you cry. Really beautiful film.

I was super worried that the romance in it was just sort of going to be thrust in there, but it certainly was not. Drama was great and all the characters were super memorable and had their own personalities. Highly recommend this one.

3. Riders In The Sky ( 1968 )

Another Czech film about WWII Czech RAF pilots. About the dynamic between a bomber crew and how they cope with the war, and the Battle of Britain. It’s adorable and I highly recommend this one too.

4. Into The White ( 2010 )

A Norwegian movie based on the story of how an RAF bomber crew and a Luftwaffe bomber crew both get shot down in the middle of Norway, and then had to learn to get along and work together to survive. What a wonderful film. Some parts can be predictable, but as a whole good. An interesting character study. Also it gets bonus points from me because it has a ginger, Scottish RAF Air gunner.

5. Wings ( 1927 )

A VERY long silent film. Takes place during WWI, two American fighter pilots, both in love with the same girl, and another girl is in love (requited) with one of them. About their rivalry and friendship, and how they deal with training and the war. The training scenes were delightful. I was worried I was going to get bored, but it was actually super excellent (and sad too). The camera work was brilliant and the musical score was amazing. It also has the first ever on-screen same-sex kiss. A really great film, even if silent films aren’t your thing, there’s SO much drama in this one. If you already love silent films, you will adore this movie, but I’d recommend it to most anyone.

6. The Dawn Patrol ( 1930 ) & ( 1938 )

About an RFC commander during WWI, who is distraught over casualties, an RFC captain, and his friend. The captain lashes out at the commander over the casualties as well after the death of a friend. Eventually the captain replaces the commander and starts to understand the stress of the job the previous major had, as his friend begins to lash out at him.

I thought it was an interesting take on both the pilots and the authorities in the RFC during the war. Both provided interesting perspectives.

I can tell you right now, unless you’re dedicated like I am, the 1938 version of The Dawn Patrol is MUCH better than the 1930 one. I’d recommend watching that version, if this movie interests you.

7. The One That Got Away ( 1957 )

About the only Luftwaffe pilot to ever escape from British POW camps. Usually I’m very wary of films that have WWII German characters, but this was very well written and remained predominantly neutral through the whole thing. Lots of clever escapes. If you like Luftwaffe pilots, escape films, and / or old movies, you will adore this film.

8. The Dam Busters ( 1955 )

A damn fine film. About the invention of the RAF “bouncing bomb” used to destroy German dams in WWII, and the RAF Squadron that flew the Lancasters to drop them. The writer of the movie was R.C. Sheriff, the original author of the play Journey’s End. Really enjoyed every aspect of the movie, my only complaint is that it was dreadfully long. Overall, a good movie, if this sort of thing interests you.

9. One Of Our Aircraft Is Missing ( 1942 )

Hands down the most intense opening scenes I had watched in any of these movies. About an RAF bomber getting shot down over Nazi occupied Holland, and they have to escape to England without being caught.

I remember being really engaged in this movie and I quite enjoyed the witty British banter. A good movie, if you like old ones.

10. La Grande Vadrouille ( 1966 )

A French WWII war comedy film about two Frenchmen who help a British bomber crew who crashed in France escape to Britain. Very strange? But also funny? But also a little dated but also incredibly hilarious? I was just really intrigued by it honestly. Reminded me of a few Monty Python sketches, despite this film being made years prior. You will either really enjoy it or not at all, but if it interests you, I’d recommend giving it a watch.

11. The Eagle And The Hawk ( 1933 )

Takes place in WWI and is about two American pilots, and various other ones, and how the war affects them, some more than others. I remember this movie surprising me quite a lot, which I think is good for a war film dealing with the sudden deaths of your comrades. Good movie, although not as well executed as The Dawn Patrol.

12. Reach For The Sky ( 1956 )

This one is LONG. About Douglas Bader, pretty much. A cute film though. You will like it if Bader or famous World War aces are your cup of tea.

13. Aces High ( 1976 )

So this movie was based off Journey’s End, except with aeroplanes. It also draws from Sagittarius Rising by Cecil Lewis (a book I’ve been meaning to find and read). If you know the plot of that play (and now more recently a movie), you will know the plot of this movie, except the names are changed. It’s a character study of three RFC pilots during WWI and the life expectancy of “Green pilots” AKA newly trained pilots.

Was a cute movie, not as good as the Journey’s End film from this year however. A lot of awkward silences and I really didn’t understand why? There was also a L’Armée de L’Air Officer who was having NONE of the British banter.

But if you liked Journey’s End and wished there were more pilots then you will enjoy it. The movie might be an interesting watch for those of you who are fans of the original play and / or movie as well.

14. The First Of The Few ( 1942 ), also titled The Spitfire

About the invention of the Spitfire fighter plane. Good if you’re really into aviation. Really liked the witty banter, however.

15. Johnny In The Clouds ( 1945 ), also titled The Way To The Stars

A romance drama. Takes place during WWII in Britain. Initially about two RAF pilots, one married and the other one with a girlfriend that he goes through a serious of hardships with. Then the 8th USAAF come, then it’s about two USAAF pilots and one RAF one, and the widowed wife. One of the USAAF pilots looks and acts like a Tarantino character. Really boring until the Americans come. I’d recommend this to people who like period romances and dramas, but the cultural stuff between the Brits and Americans was pretty good. An alright movie that takes a little bit to get into.

16. Memphis Belle ( 1990 )

REALLY CHEESY. About 8th USAAF in Britain, the bomber crew of the B-17, Memphis Belle. Except it’s not actually the crew, it’s just characters based on them. I remember the dialogue being cheesy, but still somehow better than Flyboys. Also felt pretty entertained the entire thing. A nice detail I liked was that all the bomber crew had their own individually painted A-2 jackets. Characteristic of mostly American bomber crews, and I thought that was a unique touch.

If you like cheesy, feel-good, American WWII movies, you will really like this film.

17. The Red Baron ( 2008 )

About Manfred von Richthofen. Not super accurate, but a decent amount of research done. I remember it being boring, but some of the camera shots were beautiful, looked like paintings. Boring though.

18. Angels One Five ( 1952 )

About an RAF Squadron during the Battle of Britain, except it’s more about the superior officers in that Squadron rather than the pilots. Boring, but the camera work was super high quality for a 50s film? There’s a scene where a Hurricane crashes into a base home. But mostly just officers talking and ordering folks around.

19. Twelve O’Clock High ( 1949 )

Incredibly dull and boring. Nothing but USAAF generals talking, then a bomber scene that was also boring. Flat, bland, and uninspired camerawork. Would not recommend.

20. Flyboys ( 2005 )

I’m sure many of you lads have seen my rant on this film. It’s an ugly, awful, waste of film. I can’t describe the plot of the movie, because there really isn’t one, except that a group of American volunteer pilots, called the Lafayette Escadrille, go to war. That’s it.

I found myself either laughing or yelling at the absolute ridiculousness of this film. It’s dreadful, but depending on your sense of humor, it’s VERY entertaining.

Would recommend watching it drunk, for an even more enhanced experience. I’d also suggest it if bad, horribly inaccurate, and ridiculously American action movies are your thing, you’ll have an absolute blast.

Thank you so much if you took any time to read even just one of these. I super appreciate it, this list was loads of fun and a rollercoaster of emotions. Thank you to those of you who enjoyed hearing my ranting about these bloody things.

[mycasandstarrs]

SPN 8x08: “Hunteri Heroici”

THEN: Sam and Amelia bond over losing a loved one. Cas is out of Purgatory; the truth of how/why he didn’t make it out is revealed. Naomi is the one responsible for resurrecting Cas. She is also Cas’ new boss.

Oklahoma City, Oklahoma.

That is terrifying.

RIP Gary. Heart burst right out of his chest.

“Yeah, hey, you know what? Uh, Dean's here. He really wants to talk to you.”

“Ms. Tran, yeah, hi, uh...” *hangs up*   

PFFT.

“Garth has a safe-houseboat?” I know, right?

“What's the word, Cas?”

“It’s a shortened version of my name.”

Oh, how I missed you.

“Any, uh, tablet chatter on angel radio?”

“Oh, I couldn't say. I turned that off.”

“You can do that?”

“Yeah, it's a simple matter of blocking out certain subsonic frequencies. I could draw you a diagram if you want.”

I would’ve been interested in seeing that diagram.

“Why'd you flip the switch?”

“Because it's a direct link to Heaven. And I don't want anything to do with that place – not anymore.”

Cas was trying to avoid Naomi.

AWW HON.

“I could be your third wheel.”

“You know that's not a good thing, right?”

“Of course it is. A third wheel adds extra grip, greater stability.”

Bless YOUR HEART.

“I even found a case. Oklahoma City – a man's heart jumped 10 feet out of his chest. It sounds like our kind of thing, right?” THE HUNTER LINGO, HOW ADORABLE.

Why are y’all mean to my angel???

Dean and Cas are standing rather close to each other.

“I can't sense any EMF or sulfur. Mr. Freleng's arterial health is, uh, excellent. Mm. He did recently suffer from a... *sniffs* ...mild, uh... *sniffs* What is that? ...bladder infection.”

“Cas, stop smelling the dead guy.”

Cas gets a gold star for trying.

“According to Olivia, they would meet at the park every Thursday at 12:45, walk to the Moonlight diner, where she always ordered a Caesar salad, dressing on the side. They would chat about everything, and she'd be back on the road by 1:30.”

“You don't think she's telling the truth.”

“Too much detail. Sounds rehearsed.”

At least Cas is learning from the best.

“Guy was living a lie, and it came back to bite him in the ticker.”

Don and Amelia’s wedding album. Small yikes.

The lighting during these scenes...is so superficially bright. Like it’s not real, like it’s just a dream.

“It's just this house, you – he's gonna think we're moving too fast. Are we moving too fast?” Yeah, y’all kinda are.

“So, who's this handsome fella? *Amelia’s dad walks past Sam to the dog* Yeah, he's a good boy! How you doing there? You're beautiful.” The chances of me doing that to someone are pretty high..

 (Did Sam ever meet Jess’ parents?)

“I got to say, Sam, you look like a real fixer-upper to me.” How do you even respond to that politely?

OH I KNOW WHAT THIS IS.

“Now, Ms. Freleng, I don't want to bother you. I – I really don't. But I – I do have just one question for you. *slams table* Why did you kill your husband?!”

I LOVE CAS’ ATTEMPT AT BAD COP, I LOVE HIM SO MUCH. 

“I was being bad cop.”

“No, you were being bad everything.”

Where the hell did Cas even learn to do that???

“W-what did you think Gary was hiding?”

“That he was sleeping with her.”

“I know.”

At least it was a good thing Cas exposed that right away. They can now rule out witchcraft.

Straight out of Looney Tunes.

RIP dude. Fell to his death.

“So we're looking for some sort of insect-rabbit hybrid? How do we kill it?”

I love Cas.

“They're little animated movies. You know, uh, the coyote chases a roadrunner, and then the – the anvil gets dropped on his head.”

“Is it supposed to be funny?”

Yeah, it’s hilarious. (Tho the Wile E. Coyote/Roadrunner ones were usually my least favorite ones.)

“I understand. The bird represents God. And coyote is man, endlessly chasing the divine, yet never able to catch him. It's... It's hilarious.” You and your weirdo humor.

I love Cas digging through their stuff. It’s adorable.

“Cas, you gonna book a room or what?”

“No, I'll stay here.”

“Oh, okay. Yeah. We'll have a slumber party, braid Sam's hair.”

Team Free will slumber party! That would’ve been adorable.

“Okay, well, I need my four hours, so...”

“I’ll watch over you.”

“That’s not gonna happen.”

Dean gets so flustered over that.

RIP victim #3. Killed by an anvil.

Black Hole. a nefarious bank robber.

“Hey. Can you lift this?”

Cas is like “No shit, I can lift a simple anvil.”

One of my favorite Destiel moments, as upsetting as it gets.

“Your father... Beautiful handwriting.” Aww.

“Don't get me wrong. I'm – I’m happy you're back. I'm – I’m freaking thrilled. It's just this whole mysterious-resurrection thing – it always has one mother of a downside.”

“Maybe take a trip upstairs.”

“To Heaven?”

“Yeah, poke around, see if the God squad can't tell us how you got out.”

“No.”

“Look, man, I – I hate those flying-ass monkeys just as much as you do, but –”

“Dean! I said no!”

Cas putting his foot down.

“Talk to me.” I love when Dean does that.

“Dean, I... When I was... bad... and I had all those things – the... the leviathans... writhing inside me... I caused a lot of suffering on earth, but I devastated Heaven. I vaporized thousands of my own kind, and I – I – I can't go back.” 

(Cas does a little nose scrunch there that is the cutest thing.)

“'Cause if you do, the angels will kill you.”

“Because if I see what Heaven's become – what I – what I made of it... I'm afraid I might kill myself.”

WHAT A HUGE THING TO LEARN

OF ALL THE MOMENTS TO INTERRUPT. S A M.

I would’ve kicked Sam back out.

Sunshine Retirement Home.

“You can't tell me this joint doesn't give you the heebs and/or jeebs.” And that’s where I get it from.

Cas didn’t have his FBI badge? 

Dr. Dwight Mahoney.

(Also, the group alias: Crosby, Stills, and Nash.)

Cas is pretty.

“Oh! You look so much like my third husband.” Get it Sheila!

The heart eyes!

“A lot of these people – they just tune out and live in their own heads. It's like maybe the real world is too much for them, and they just run and hide, you know?”

Sam kinda looked disgusted with that meal.

“Uh, my father was in the Marines.”

“Jarhead, huh?”

“That's right. Uh, 2nd battalion, First Marines, Echo company.”

“I always thought they were a little puffed up, myself. But, hey. What do I know? I'm just an old grunt.”

Have some respect, dude.

“Sam, you got the look.”

“The look?”

“The one a lot of guys get after they've been through the meat grinder – the one that lets you know they've seen a lot of crap they can't forget. The second their feet hit solid ground, they start running, and they don't stop – not till they find something to hold on to.”

“You think that's what I'm doing here? Just holding on?”

Yeah, Sam.

“I think the two of you are holding on to each other, yeah. 'Cause I know she's scared. After what happened to Don, I don't blame her for taking off. Needing to run away and hide – I know why she did it. The question is – what are you running from, Sam?” Amelia’s dad freaking exposed them.

Fred Jones, a psychokinetic.

“So, you really think this one man is causing all of these... shenanigans?”

Testing the theory, Dean hit himself with a book. It’s textbook cartoon-ish, right down to the birdies.

“Do we... kill him?”

“Excuse me, Agents. Did he just threaten to murder one of my patients?”

Of all the times to get caught.

The cake mishap.

“Fred’s gone.”

“What?”

I’ll always love exasperated Cas.

Dr. Mahoney, the real villain.

The orderly just spills all the tea.

“Seems to me like the dude's living in a dream world.”

“This – it won't last. You are living in a dream world.”

“Sam is a mess.”

“I'm a mess. But when I'm with Sam, I'm happy, Dad. And I haven't been happy in a really long time. So please, just... let us be messes together.” 

But that’s how it falls apart.

At least the Dad immediately started on the “give him a chance” thing.

Cas gets him and Sam inside Fred’s mind.

Shattered reality.

“What's up, Doc?” Dean saw a chance and he took it.

“You let me walk, and half of this is yours.” UH REALLY

“Give up! I've been dealing with this crazy for months! And you – idiot – bring a gun to a gag fight.” Great line.

Sam vague talking about his own experience.

“Look, it can be nice living in a dream world. It can be great. I know that. And you can hide, and you can pretend...all the crap out there doesn't exist, but you can't do it forever because... eventually, whatever it is you're running from – it'll find you. It'll come along, and it'll punch you in the gut. And then... then you got to wake up, because if you don't, then trying to keep that dream alive will destroy you! It'll destroy everything!”

Fred takes back control.

RIP Dr. Mahoney. Forced to shoot himself.

“Now that's all, folks.”

“You got to make it stop.”

“There might be a way. The procedure will be painful, and... when it's over, I'm not sure how much of you will be left.”

“Well, what are you waiting for?”

Awww, Cas earned shotgun riding!

“I have been trying to pretend that I can escape what I did in Heaven, but I can't. All that pain that I caused – I – I have to come back, to make things right.” Cas took Sam’s words to heart.

“I want to stay with Mr. Jones. Someone should watch over him for a few days just to be safe.”

“Okay, and then what?”

“Then I'm not sure. But I know I can't run anymore.”

:’)

“So, Ame is playing the Sugarplum fairy, right? Right? Now, this is her big moment, you understand, and she waddles up onto the stage –”

“Waddles?”

“What? You were a chubby kid. It was adorable. Anyway, she waddles up onto the stage, and she is dragging two feet of toilet paper behind her.”

A cute family moment...

Sam opens up about what he’s running from: losing Dean.

Sam’s gut punch has come. Don’s alive.

“Ode to Joy from Symphony No.9” by Ludwig van Beethoven.

[blessuswithblogs]

Cycles, Lies, and Memories: On the Thematic and Narrative Incompatibility of Dark Souls 2 and Dark Souls 3

~Warning! This post contains spoilers for Dark Souls, Dark Souls 2 and all DLC, and Dark Souls 3 and Ariandel and the Ringed City! Read at your own risk~

My stance on Dark Souls 3 is likely well known at this point: it's kind of a bummer. The two DLC packages, Ashes of Ariandel and The Ringed City, are in particular rather dire, but after some reflection, I think that the thing that really just rubs me the wrong way about the third installment is how it largely disavows that 2 ever happened. My stance on Dark Souls 2 is probably even more well known by now: it's actually a masterpiece of interactive fiction. Naturally, the fact that 3 likes to pretend that it doesn't exist is distressing to me. Now, especially with Ringed City, there are some concrete references to 2's world. The mysteriously flammable windmill of Earthen Peak and the sexy desert pyromancer outfit feature prominently in the Dreg Heap, the first miserable area of the Ringed City where screaming angels rain holy death upon you nonstop until you find their hidden summoners. Lapp, an NPC you meet here, is going hollow, and seeks the purging monument to restore his fading memories, which pays some lipservice to the powerful themes of loss of identity and self present in the second game but is otherwise completely absent in 3's narrative. These offerings come too little, too late to avert a very considerable gap between the cosmology and thematic elements of the two games.

Let's start with Hollowing. Hollowing is the process by which the undead, over the course of many deaths over the endless march of years, gradually lose themselves to the curse of the Darksign. Hollowing is an important element of Dark Souls 1, and utterly crucial to the story of 2. The process is almost absence in 3. Hollows still exist, but their role in things is alarmingly different. The player character doesn't hollow on death naturally. It's a mechanic that only appears if you do the Londor sidequest and Yoel draws out your "true strength" and manifests the dark sigil. Londor is apparently an entire nation of hollows, with advanced religious institutions and pilgrimages and fancy rings and purging stones to keep the hollows mostly functional. The entire idea of this, has, from the outset, struck me as absurd. There's no possible way that a nation of hollows could function at all in the paradigm of dark souls 1 and 2, because it would be a nation of people who do not even recognize themselves or society at large. The introduction of quick fixes to the problem of hollowing can be written off narratively with retcons to old information and allowed for with the changing, decaying state of the world, but it will never be graceful, and there is no way to reconcile these developments thematically. The desperate search to find a way to stave off hollowing defined some of my favorite characters in 2, like Lucatiel and Vendrick, but evidently you can just rub some purging stones on your face and you'll last to the damn end of the world. It doesn't even make sense in context of Dark Souls 1, where the way to restore yourself was with pillaged Humanity. It feels, in a way, oddly disrespectful to what came before, which is especially strange for a game like Dark Souls 3 that is so chock-full of desperate callbacks and recycled material.

This brings us to another stark contrast between 2 and 3: 2 was fiercely its own thing. It was its own thing to the point that people (myself included, for a time) felt that it was too different from one, that there weren't enough callbacks to the first game. In the end, though, this individuality was what really endeared me to Dark Souls 2. It took the framework from 1 and expanded upon the world and cosmology in a thoughtful, creative way that allowed it to be a game all its own. 3 is like ridiculously not that. 3 lives and dies by its fan pandering, callbacks, and slavish devotion to the order that 1 put forth. This is completely and utterly encapsulated by the two DLC packages, which both take place in worlds that are ripped straight from 1 (and 2). Ariandel is another painted world, filled with references to the first and Priscilla. The Dreg Heap is literally an amalgamation of all the works of man, dragged to the end of the world, and the ringed City is a reskin of Anor Londo, right up to housing a Large Girl Holding it All Together that you can kill to make everything 5000x worse. The bosses are The Last Two Demons, Another Fucking Slog of a Dragon  Fight, the Old Monk, and Martyr Artorias. There are no new ideas here. Like, alarmingly so. The chestnut the game dangles in front of you is the mystery of the Dark Soul of Man and the pygmy lords, but, it's actually really hard to care about. I've done this all before, and done it better. Certainly, there's metatextual weight to this sensation due to how everything sort of smooshes together at the apocalypse, but it doesn't outweight how stale it all feels anyway.

Following from this might be my biggest observed discrepency: how 2 and 3 treat the cycle of fire and dark. In 3, the cycle has a definite end in the god danged End of the World, Fire Goin' Out, All Becomes Dust sense. 2, however, proposes a cycle that is well and truly endless, as a sort of karmic constant of the universe. The nature of 2's world is purgatorial, a divine punishment upon those who were self-important enough to deem themselves gods that the rest of us got caught up in. Gwyn and his cohorts are forgotten by the march of time, replaced by new gods, who are then themselves lost and replaced, forevermore. The soul of the ineffable reincarnates Gwyn, Seath, Nito, and the Witch for all eternity, doomed to repeat their mistakes in different forms over and over. Fire and Dark are the same, and one cannot exist without the other. This is entirely in line with the principles laid out in the opening sequence of the entire series: fire created disparity. Dark did not exist before fire. Dark Souls 3, however, takes a different direction entirely, and the Abyss becomes an entity seemingly outside of this dichotomy. At least, according to the locust preachers. They could be full of it. The game does call them out on being an unruly lot who only think about their stomachs. "Where fire resideth, shadows twist and shrivel. But in the Abyss, there are shadows none. Fear not, the dark, my friend." is the line I'm thinking about, which implies the Abyss is some sort of Ur-Darkness that can exist without contrasting light. Either way, there's a lot of contradictions between these two cosmological paradigms. Another example of this is how in Dark Souls 3, the old gods of Lordran are still a big deal, with like three different Divine Cities of Wonder squirreled away where agents of the old aristocracy still venerate Gwyn's Great and Mighty Sunlight Penis. Part of this seems to be a lack of original ideas to draw from, but it also betrays a cosmological bias towards the finders of the First Flame. The difference in the way that the universe treats Gwyn and company in Dark Souls 2 and 3 is a huge part of what drives them apart as narratives that can coexist in the same universe.

Aldia, Scholar of the First Sin, and all around Guy Who Knows About Stuff, seems to have the right of it. One of the major points of Dark Souls 2 was the futility of the first game's ending choice. Whether one links the fire or leaves it to fade does not matter within this eternal cycle. If linked, the flame will always fade again. If left to gutter, someone will always come along to stoke the fire once more. Mankind's "true shape", as posited by Vendrick, will never be realized because of the interference of fearful gods. Humans were descended of the Dark Soul, the soul that stands in contrast to the brilliant energies of light and fire that Gwyn, Nito, and the Witch found, and the gods hated it. They felt it was a threat, and so went against the natural order of things to prolong their own age of fire and used their fantastic power to curse humanity with transient forms. The most powerful lines in the series are delivered by Aldia: "No matter how tender, how exquisite, a lie will remain a lie." By his estimation, there are but two paths: inherit the order of this world, or destroy it. He is not referring to linking the fire or embracing the dark, because he knows that those are the same thing. To destroy the order of the world is to overcome the curse, to transcend it, to render the ultimatum of the gods ineffective. Gwyn's meddling left humanity with the choice of either continuing his vainglories to stave off Hollowing, or to defy him and become detestable creatures of the dark without self or identity. Aldia staked everything he had on finding a way to remove the curse, and ultimately lost it all in his endeavors. What those were are a matter for another time, but if you're asking, I think he tried to create another First Flame like the witch did. Honestly, I think he met with more success than the Witch of Izalith, because at least he didn't create a demon race, and he does seem to be beyond the curse.

The second ending of Dark Souls 2 is one which is available if you do all the DLC and collect the crowns of the kings, and speak to Vendrick in his memory. By collecting the crowns of true and almost true monarchs, you accumulate enough power in the crowns to overcome the Curse of Life. You don't cure or remove it, but by wearing one of the crowns, you become immune to hollowing. You can die as many times as you can imagine, and still retain your sense of self. The cycle of fire and dark is an allegory to the Buddhist concept of Samsara: death and rebirth. However, it is not a total transplantation. It finds roots in Samsara and Nirvana, but in Souls 2, the end result of Nirvana is significantly different, perhaps unattainable. In Buddhist doctrine, the ultimate release from Samsara comes from the quenching of the three fires, or poisons, of passion, ignorance, and aversion, becoming a being of "no-self." Way smarter people than me have talked about  this a lot and my analysis is extremely pedestrian, but the idea of no-self comes into conflict with the ultimate goal of removing hollowing: retention of self. The iconic line, "The Curse of Life is the Curse of Want", is a very Samsara-tastic sentiment, but ultimately, enlightenment in Souls 2 is more straightforward than in Buddhist doctrine, as beings of no-self are acknoweledged by scholars to be somewhat paradoxical concepts. I think I've gotten slightly off track here. But that's good! Games that give you a lot to think about are good. That's my opinion and you can put it on a t-shirt. OKAY LET'S MOVE ON, BACK TO THE SECOND ENDING.

What happens is that Aldia confronts you after Nashandra's defeat, not to actually stop you or really do you harm but to simply test your convictions. Do you embrace the lie, or do you use your insight and the power of the crowns to search for a different path? By leaving the room, you choose to search for something different, and Aldia's disembodied voice accompanies you and muses about the difficulties ahead. There is no path. Beyond the scope of light and the reach of dark, you'll have to make your own. It's an extremely uplifting and affecting conclusion to the game. It's imperfect. It's not enlightenment, exactly. We still seek an answer, insatiably, but it is a form of transcendence born of a deep dissatisfaction with the order of the world, a sort of affirmation that to yearn for something better is not evil. It's hopeful and melancholy at the same time, a powerful conclusion to a personal journey, and perhaps the start of another. The fate of the world may not have changed, but the fate of the bearer of the curse has, and there is value in that. The search for truth is what gives the truth meaning. The questions the game raises about what it means to be a "true monarch" are thought provoking and powerful, encouraging the player to reject traditional models of power and monarchy by throwing like all of the shade ever at most of the kings to have ever ruled in the world of Dark Souls. Vendrick did all of this amazing stuff with the power of his soul, but in the end, was too cowardly to amount to anything. Gwyn was a vainglorious liar afraid of his own shadow. The old Iron King built a fucking magma castle just because he could. The only king to not get roasted is the Old Ivory King, who sacrificed everything for the wellbeing of his subjects, which is what we come to understand as the duty of a True Monarch: to not take the easy, convenient path.

In Dark Souls 3 there is absolutely no mention of any of this like EXTREMELY IMPORTANT SHIT where there's an undead who DOESN'T GO HOLLOW AT ALL UMM??? and the apocalypse is encroaching on a world where apocalypse should have no real meaning. The world has already ended and been reborn countless times before this. Kingdoms rise and fall and only Straid of Olaphis seems to remember the ones that came before because he spent the long centuries as a dang rock. It's not just that it feels like Dark Souls 2 never happened. It's that for Dark Souls 3 to work at all, it -needs- to have never happened. A lot of this probably comes from the fact that different teams worked on these games with different visions, but I feel like it's really disrespectful for the returning Miyazaki team to just disregard the genuinely fantastic work the "B team" did. This is especially true when you consider that Souls 3 is, as stated, kind of a fuckin bummer my dudes. It gives off the distinct impression of a game that never really wanted to be made. It feels reluctant to show its true self, which is almost unheard of in the Souls series, which in all other instances has worn its own self on its sleeve since the very beginning. Even after all this time, I don't know what Dark Souls 3 is really trying to say. It stands in opposition to its own predecessors despite feeling the need to draw so much from them, and this dissonance is ultimately the final nail in the coffin. It's a shame it had to end like this, but it also feels somewhat inevitable after the response that Dark Souls 2 got from ~angry gamers~. I hope that whatever Miyazaki and his team work on next, they can put their all into without reservation, and in the meantime, other developers try their hands at the souls formula. I want more games like Salt and Sanctuary and Nioh! ...even if it does mean I have to put up with the occasional Lords of the Fallen.