#despite the story telling not being what i want. its not terrible by any means. it just feels very young adult if that makes sense.

[thrucrax]

i won't finish veilguard soon i'm a heinous over completer i see a quest or activities that are not main story related? i'm going. sorry you gave me an exact count of things to collect, i'm going to collect them

[loverofstufflof]

Black Myth: Wukong rant because I’m just… so tired of you people.

I hate the community this game has cultivated. I hate looking through the tags and seeing people tearing each other apart over a game based on a story I love.

There’s two stances:

Those who say that merely interacting with the game is in support of all the terrible things the developers have (allegedly) done. Who parade accusations that many have stated were mistranslated and that the situation is far more complicated than it appears.

Those who mock the former by making a straw man of their concerns while simultaneously displaying their misogyny, racism, homophobia, and general traits that make it clear they’ve never touched a woman in their life.

One is slightly more tolerable than the other. Neither make me feel welcome in enjoying this project I’ve been looking forward to for years.

I will be talking more about purple, because I don’t speak Chinese, and feel that I have no authority speaking too much on orange.

Purple people are beyond insufferable.

I think that most of this came from a Screen Rant review that listed one of the game’s flaws as “a lack of diversity.” This is an accurate analysis, and has been warped beyond belief.

I can understand the outrage… a bit. When playing a game surrounding Chinese culture, in which you play as an inhuman character fighting equally inhuman enemies, it doesn’t make too much sense to request racial representation. And when there isn’t any romance, representation for sexual orientations also wouldn’t work. Including anything in those merit would feel forced and out of place, I agree.

But you wanna know what the reviewer wrote?

She was concerned about the lack of women.

She felt unwelcome when playing a game made by rumoured misogynists because there were no women at all.

And she explicitly said that the game was still enjoyable despite this.

She gave it such a “low score” (3/5) because of the performance issues and repetitiveness. By her own rating, the game was listed as “Worth a shot despite its flaws.”

Everything got so bad they had to take down her name for her safety.

People in the purple category took this review to mean that the “woke left” was “pushing an agenda” and “trying to cancel this game for not having pansexual nonbinary black people.” Which, as I’m sure you can now understand, was not the case. The boycott surrounding this game is purely based on accusations targeted towards the developers, not the game’s content.

Of course, I don’t expect many of the aforementioned people in this category to care too much. I’ve seen the Steam reviews where they praise the lack of women. I’ve read the Reddit threads where they feel grateful that there’s “finally a company who understands the male authority.” I’ve scrolled through post after post on Tumblr that “no one would want to play a game where females jiggle their tits around while doing nothing.”

That last one gets me. It’s really telling what you can learn about a person when they say things like that.

The point is, these people make me feel very unwelcome in a community that previously made me most comfortable.

So let’s recap:

The people who I would find community with are portraying the mere interest in this game as a sin that’s worthy of being blocked and shamed over, and the people who are actually in this community remind me why I’m terrified to walk alone.

I have a lot more that I want to say on this, but I don’t really have the words quite yet, and still need to do a fair amount of research (which I probably won’t be doing because holy shit I’m so done with this). Maybe I’ll come back and add some more, but for now I just might block the tag entirely.

I just feel shitty ‘s’all ʅ（◞‿◟）ʃ

[byeoltoyuki]

✴︎ Time is all we have ✴︎

↳ Pairing: Wooyoung x reader

❧ Genre : fluff, angst, demons

❧ Words : +19k

❧ Warnings : stalkish behavior, violence, oral

❧ Summary : You never believed in ghosts or demons but when a terribly attractive man starts messing with your life, you’re forced to reconsider.

Sequel : For Eternity

A/N: I haven't written anything for so damn long and of course when I get back to it I can't make it short. Damn, I feel rusty. Definitely gonna be more active. Enjoy!

❀

You knew there was something wrong with you.

Well, maybe not completely with you but definitely with your life. You weren’t a believer per say; you didn’t believe in an afterlife, nor did you believe in God or demons and even less in ghosts. But and it was a big but, you couldn’t deny that the past two months made you think that maybe there was something out there. Something that had been playing with you, messing with you. Your normal, peaceful life had gone from calm to shit crazy and there was no rational explanation to it, leaving you with no other choice but consider the impossible. What if something was haunting you?

Impossible, ridiculous were your initial thoughts and till this day a little voice still told you that, but another part of you whispered to you, warning you that something dark and dangerous was lingering in the darkness, watching you closely. You didn’t want to believe, really, but you couldn’t deny it any longer. Not when you were standing in the darkness, in the middle of your living room and that a silhouette was standing by your window, arms crossed over its chest. As your eyes adapted to the lack of light, you realized it was a man.

You blinked, once, twice, your heart missing a beat as slowly fear crept over you. “Who are you?”

Despite your fear, you wanted to sound as confident as possible. You wanted whoever was in this room to know that you were not weak but your voice had betrayed you.

He chuckled in response, sensing your fear, discomfort and attempt at being courageous. Clearly, you were an amusing little thing. He took a step closer to you, knowing well that in this darkness you wouldn’t be able to see him, to recognize him.

“Stop!” You ordered putting your hands before you to shield you. It was dumb, you knew that very well but did it nonetheless. “Don’t come any closer.”

“Or what? What can possibly the little human do to stop me?”

The term ‘human’ made your blood run cold. Here was the proof your relational side needed to confirm that something unnatural was going on in your life. Or maybe he was just a psychopath.

‘Who are you’ was once again on the tip of your tongue but you stopped yourself.

His voice. You knew this voice, not only from that night at the club but also from your dream.

It couldn’t be. There was no way.

Your heart leapt into your throat at the realization. You knew exactly who was in the room, hiding himself in the dark. The thing that you did not know was what he was and the simple idea of voicing your guess terrified you.

“What are you?”

Instead of answering you, he took another step closer and then another. A little voice was screaming at you, telling you to run but your feet stayed glued to the floor. You watched him getting dangerously closer to you and then you saw it. Red eyes glowing in the darkness.

“I think you know the answer, doll.”

You were not a believer. But this man made you believe. Because right before your eyes stood an inhuman being.

A demon.

❀

Then,

“This is ridiculous.” You groaned in pure despair as you all took seat around the table in Soojin’s living room. Why, oh why, did your friends decide that a good, fun night should end in some horror and ghost stories? You weren’t particularly scared since you didn’t believe in spirits but it didn’t mean you enjoyed the game either. It freaked you out. Always had.

“Don’t be a party pooper, Y/N.” Soojin nudged you with her elbow. She put the Ouija board in the middle of the table and you couldn’t help but shiver at the sight of it. It was old and dusty and looked just as ominous as in your memories. Or maybe it was the atmosphere in the room. Soojin wasn’t playing around when she suggested to use the board. She lit as many candles as she could around her living room, setting an almost mystic, eerie atmosphere.

“Ouah! It looks old!” Mingi moved the board closer to him to have a look. “And not handmade. Clearly, you’ve got it for a while.”

“Yep! Found it at my grandma’s place long ago and kept it all this time.”

“And did you use it?” Mina seemed not as thrilled as the three other and you could almost guess why. Dealing with ghost stories, she could, in fact in the past she used to tell you the best stories ever that would make you shiver and gasp in surprise. Now, an Ouija board? Communicating with spirits? That was a whole other level of crazy considering what had happened in her life recently.

“Yes, with Y/N!” She was definitely too excited.

You rolled your eyes in response.

“Let me guess, you scared each other?” Seonghwa eyed the two of you with a knowing look.

“She,” You pointed an accusing finger at Soojin, “tried to scare the shit out of me. Too bad it didn’t work.” That was obviously a half truth. Back then, Soojin swore it wasn’t her doing and a spirit really did communicate with the two of you. The rational part, or maybe the scared part of you, refused to believe it and rather wanted to blame Soojin. However, the little voice inside your head told you another story, a story you would rather not think about.

Soojin scoffed but chose to ignore your remark. For the better. You had been friends for more than ten years, she knew everything about you and of course, she knew exactly how you felt about ghosts.

“I suppose, everybody knows the rules? I think we all watched enough horror movies to know them by now.” Soojin said

Mingi clapped his hands, excited to ‘play’.

“Be polite.” Seonghwa remembered the rule and at the same time glanced at Mingi who was his main concern. He loved his friend but whenever he was too excited about something he could forget the basics. “And always say goodbye.”

“Good, good. Do you know what you’re going to ask?”

Everybody nodded except you. You accepted being part of it which was already a huge miracle, but that didn’t mean you have to think about questions. Luckily for your group, they all had questions on mind.

Soojin nodded, satisfied. “Well then, let’s begin.”

The moment your put your finger on the planchette, a shiver run down your spine. Ten years later and you still had that dreadful feeling. There was some bad energy emanating from the board and apparently you were the only one bothered by it.

“Hello. Is there any spirit with us?” Soojin started, her eyes gleaming with excitement.

Just like ten years ago, nothing happened at first. No movement whenever it was from an actual spirit or your friends. Nobody talked, barely breathing as all of you waited for something to happen.

“Maybe they don’t want to talk to us.” Mingi commented

“They definitely don’t want to talk to you.” Seonghwa replied, rolling his eyes at his friend’s impatience. Not like he was surprised.

“Hush you two.” Soojin ordered, eyes sending daggers. “Please, ignore my friends. Is there anybody?”

You closed your eyes for a moment, a chill running down your spine. You couldn’t describe how you felt; a mixture of anxiousness, of uneasiness and maybe even fear. There was definitely something in the air, and you felt a surge of energy from the board that forced you to open your eyes and look at it. Once more, it appeared you were the only one to notice that there was definitely something going on.

“Soojin, I-“ you started saying but was cut short as the planchette started moving. It went straight to the ‘yes’.

“Oh shit.” Mina gasped in surprise.

“Who’s doing it?” Seonghwa asked. Finally, someone was as skeptical as you. “There’s no way-“

“Oh come on. Please don’t be like Y/N!” Soojin almost begged which earned her a kick under the table from you. She couldn’t expect all of you to believe that there was something in the dark, watching them.

“It’s okay, Seonghwa. Let them play.” You gave him a reassuring smile.

But your smile vanished as soon as the planchette started moving again. You watched it, letters after letters until you could have the full picture - a picture that made you squirm with uneasiness in your seat.

‘HELLO FRIEND.’

To say you were shocked would be an understatement. Your first reaction was to glare at Soojin. She was the only one who knew about it, who had experienced it with you. Ten years ago, when you believed your friend was the one playing trick on you, the ‘spirit’ had said the same thing: hello friend.

Soojin looked back at you. For someone who was so excited about the whole thing, she didn’t look so thrilled any longer. Her face looked paler and her hand, the one on the planchette, started shaking.

If for a moment you were convinced, she was the one messing with you, now you weren’t so sure. Soojin was a terrible actress, there was no way she could fake her uneasiness.

“He-hello.” She stuttered, cleared her throat and looked around her. “We have some questions for you. Can you please help us?”

This time around it didn’t take long to reply. It moved instantly on ‘yes’.

“Can I ask?” Despite her initial enthusiasm, Mina looked somehow sadder and you could easily guess why. Her dad passed away six months ago and she didn’t get the chance to say goodbye. It was a sudden death that nobody could have predicted which made things much more complicated and worse. You bet she wanted a chance to say goodbye even if it meant to believe in ghosts.

Soojin understood it too and so did the boys.

“Go on. You can do it.” Soojin encouraged her.

“Can you please tell me if my dad is in peace?”

Your heart clenched in pain for her. Mina was a sweet girl, cheerful, honest and so loyal to her friends. It hurt you to see the pain and the sadness in her eyes, she didn’t deserve such trouble in her life. So when the planchette moved to ‘no’, you felt your blood boil in your veins. Whoever was messing with you deserved a good punch in the face.

“What do you mean no?” Mina asked louder than intended.

“Guys, it’s not fun.” Seonghwa was not amused either.

You were about to let go of the planchette when you felt a warm breath on your neck. You froze, unable to move, to speak. You glanced behind you but there was nothing and nobody. Of course, there wasn’t. You were slowly losing your mind. This whole ouija board was a bad idea.

It moved again.

‘HELL’

It took Mina a lot of willpower not to let go of the planchette just because of the stupid rule but tears were gathering in her eyes. None of it made sense.

“Why” she whispered to herself

“Why would any of you do it to her?” This time Seonghwa sounded angry and ready to flip the table.

But none of you got the chance to defend yourself as the planchette moved once more as if to answer his question. Taunting him.

‘FUN’

Heart racing, you grew uncomfortable with every passing second, with every answers. You didn’t want to believe that something was really answering you, but you couldn’t ignore the sick feeling in your stomach nor could you ignore the feeling of being watched. Just like ten damn years ago.

Before any of your friends could react to the last answer, you leaned closer to the board, ready for the only question you could come out with. “Are you the one from 10 years ago?”

Deep inside you, you already knew the answer, you just didn’t want to admit it.

‘YES’

‘MISSED ME?’

It left you speechless and shaking.

Luckily for you, Soojin decided to take the matter in her hands. She took a deep breath and with a steady voice spoke again. “Thank you for your help. Goodbye.”

None of you spoke for a moment, still eying the board, almost as if you expected the planchette to move on its own. But it didn’t and you started breathing again.

“So. Who thought it was a good idea?”

❀

You were late. Like very, very late. And you couldn’t explain it. If there was one thing you were well known about it was that you were never late, you made sure of it. Whether it was to meet with your friends or work related you were either on time or you would come up earlier than intended. But today, somehow you were late.

You didn’t hear your first alarm. Or the second or the third. No matter how loud it rang, you just didn’t hear it and you couldn’t explain it either. You checked your phone twice before going to bed, just by habits and to make sure that you had them all activated. They were. So what happened?

You felt stressed and angry with yourself. If only it was the only problem. You could, eventually, get over the fact that you missed your alarms and that you were running late but apparently it wasn’t enough. To add to your misery, you couldn’t find your keys. You knew you have left them in the hall, like every day since you moved in.

And yet they were missing.

“For fuck’s sake!” You groaned in frustration, ruffling your hair in pure despair. You were losing precious minutes and it was absolutely driving you crazy. 

You went through your bag one more time, in case you had somehow put them back in (that would have been odd). With no luck.

“Fine.” You told yourself, resigned. “Breathe, Y/N, breathe. It’s okay.”

There wasn’t much you could do at this point and you couldn’t lose any more precious minutes. You quickly typed a message to Soojin, asking her to bring the spare keys.

You grabbed your bag and your jacket and left, slamming the door a little too hard behind you.

You swore you heard a chuckle.

❀

By the time you got to your office you were one hour late. To say that your arrival didn’t go unnoticed would be an understatement. Some of your colleagues joked about your lateness, some simply stared and some completely ignored you which you didn’t mind at all.

“Rough morning?” Minhyuk interrupted your thoughts by putting a cup of coffee right under your nose.

The combination of coffee and Minhyuk made you instantly forget about your shitty morning and made you smile. How could you say no to a coffee brought by your crush?

“My savior.” You beamed at him. You grabbed the warm cup and brought it closer to your face. “I need it so badly.”

“Yeah, you look like you do.” He said with a smirk, teasing you.

“Are you trying to tell me I look like shit?” You feigned being offended. You and Minhyuk had been friends for more than four years; he was the one that welcomed you in the company and showed you everything. It wasn’t hard to like him when he was so friendly and considerate. Actually, you didn’t know a single soul who didn’t like him.

“I would never.” He defended himself but then his smile turned into a frown. “What happened?”

“That’s actually a good question.” You sincerely told him as you took a sip of your hot coffee. “I slept through my alarms and then couldn’t find my keys.”

Minhyuk hummed in understanding. “Oh how we love this kind of morning.”

“Cheers to that.” You raised your cup and chuckled.

“Y/N? Sorry to interrupt guys.” Minji, the best boss in history, called for you. She gave the two of you a small, knowing smile (you wished she would stop playing the match-maker). “Quick question. Did you finish the preparation for the presentation?”

“I did. I’ll forward it to you.” If only things were that simple.

“Hold on.” You told Minhyuk.

What were the odds that your day could actually get any shittier? The folder that you had prepared last week was empty, all files erased. Your face paled as you double checked and still couldn’t find any trace of your files. “You got to be shitting me.”

Minhyuk leaned over your shoulder to have a look, a glance was enough to understand your problem. “Call the IT, maybe they can recover the files for you.”

You weren’t a believer but you dared to hope that someone would hear your prayer.

❀

You woke up screaming, body covered in cold sweat, heart roaring in your ears. It took you a moment to calm down, to reassure yourself. You were in your room, in your bed. There were no spirits haunting you, following you wherever you went. There were no spirits trying to talk to you while looking dark and dangerous.

No. you were safe. At home.

Hand on your chest, you closed your eyes and concentrated on your breathing. Inhale, exhale, repeat. You didn’t know how long it took you, every time you thought you had regained control over your body and your emotions, images of the ugly ‘thing’ chasing you, screaming at you, would pop in your mind.

From the moment you fell asleep and started dreaming, you knew it was just another nightmare, nothing unusual. At least you thought so until you couldn’t wake up. No matter how many times you told yourself to wake up, you couldn’t open your eyes.

You checked your phone, only to see that it was three in the morning – you still had plenty of time to get back to sleep. You could, but the memory of the nightmare was still too fresh and you were scared to have another one.

“What should I do.” You pondered out loud, ruffling your hair in frustration.

A chuckle echoed in the room. It was faint which made you pause. Either your tired mind was imagining things (and you hoped it was the case) or someone had broken in while you were sleeping (unlikely). With shaky hand you reached for the lamp and switched the light on.

Just like you expected (or more like hoped) there was nothing wrong with your room and there was definitely nobody watching you from the corner of your room. Clearly, it was better for you to go back to sleep.

Before you go crazy.

❀

There were people that were naturally clumsy and then, there were those who were just unlucky. You were neither. Or at least you believed so. But after a week of very unlucky and upsetting events, you wondered if maybe you were actually part of those people.

The incidents with your keys happened a few more times, except this time you didn’t bother looking for them, deciding that maybe you were just too distracted and moved them without actually remembering it.

Maybe.

Spilling coffee all over your white blouse, tripping over on the stairs and almost breaking your leg, a guy trying to steal your bag (and got a nice punch from you in return), you could go on with the list of incidents that happened in just one week. You should be terrified but all you could think about was ‘thank god, it was finally Friday’. No more incidents, no more work, you could finally stay at your place, safely and relaxing.

But not now. For now, you had other plans. When Soojin suggested to go clubbing you almost yelled your ‘yes’, way too happy to have a drink, or four, and dance. Better yet, Minhyuk chose to tag along. What a reward after such a week.

But maybe you shouldn’t have been so happy about his presence after all. No less than twenty minutes in the club and Minhyuk was gone, talking to some pretty brunette. Despite him being a good friend, Minhyuk was also a flirt, you knew it and yet you couldn’t help but feel jealous whenever he went for someone else.

You sighed in defeat and took a sip of your mojito.

Soojin nudged you playfully with her leg. “Maybe you should talk to him. You’ve been friends since day one.”

“I think it will be a waste of time.” You admitted as you glanced at him and the girl. He liked her. Well, maybe not like like, but he definitely intended to leave this place with her and judging by how touchy she was getting, you had no doubt it would work.

“He cares for you.” Soojin protested

“That he does, I know it. But he doesn’t see me as anything more. I’m not blind.” That was why Minhyuk was just a crush; a person you could have around and yet couldn’t have at the same time. There were days it bothered you, like tonight.

You glanced one more time at the couple. Nope, you refused to let your jealousy get the better of you, you refused to mope when finally, you could enjoy yourself and maybe find someone with who to leave. Maybe.

You emptied your drink and went straight for the crowd, mingling with people. You closed your eyes, a small smile spread on your lips as you started moving your body, forgetting all about the day, forgetting about your troubles. You let the music guide your moves.

Soon enough, a guy joined you, hands on your hips, he pressed your body against his. You didn’t mind, at first, it was after all your goal to find yourself a man for the night, but quickly he got too touchy, touching places he shouldn’t without your consent.

“I don’t think so.” You told the guy as you faced him, frowning and ready to punch him if needed.

“Oh come on.” He laughed, unfazed by your annoyance. “You were asking for it.”

The urge to punch him was getting stronger and stronger. You scoffed at his reply. “Get lost.”

Apparently, he didn’t like your answer. He took a step forward, hand outstretched ready to grab your wrist. He didn’t get a chance.

Despite your annoyance and your full attention on the man before you, you couldn’t ignore the sudden presence behind you. Not simply people dancing, but someone standing right behind you. Someone wrapped an arm around your waist and pulled you against a firm torso. You blinked, confused.

“I don’t think my girlfriend likes your attention.” A very nice and charming voice echoed from behind you.

“Your girlfriend was asking for it.” The man snickered and eyed the two of you.

Despite his remark (that annoyed you deeply), you noticed how he took a step back, ready to flee. Whoever was holding you made a rather strong impression on the man which made you only curious about him.

“Fuck off.” Your savior growled. A deep and menacing growl.

It worked.

You almost laughed at how quick the man left, mumbling under his nose. Didn’t need to be a genius to guess what he was saying.

“Better?” The man let go of your waist and took a step back, giving you some space.

You turned to face him. You didn’t know what you expected to see after hearing his voice but clearly not that. The man, the savior was ridiculously hot. There was no way this man could be human. Pretty eyes, sharp jaw, definitely kissable lips, black hair. And damn the lovely mole under his eye. To say you were mesmerized would be the understatement of the century.

You cleared your throat. “Thank you.”

His smile turned from gentle to devilish at the sound of your voice and the look on your face – you felt exposed as if he could read your mind. “You’re welcome, my lady. Now shall we?” He outstretched his hand, inviting you to dance.

How in the world could you say no?

The moment you placed your hand in his, he yanked you with so much strength against him, you almost fell in his arms. He didn’t let go of your hand for a moment which seemed like eternity to you. You almost forgot where you were, almost forgot you weren’t alone in the room. It certainly felt like it.

Being so close to his face felt intoxicating.  You didn’t want him to let go of you; you didn’t want to move. In fact, more you looked into those dark, beautiful eyes, more you wanted to press your body fully against him and kiss him. Those stupidly, inviting lips.

His smile grew wider, once more you had the sensation that he knew exactly what was going on in your pretty little head. But instead of actually giving you exactly what you wanted, he spun you in his arms and pressed you hard against him.

Your breath hitched in your throat at the sensation of his warm, strong body. Despite your clothes being in the way (and oh how much you wished it wasn’t), his warmth completely enveloped you.

One hand on your hip, the other on your stomach, he started moving in the rhythm of the music, guiding your body. You closed your eyes to fully enjoy the music, to enjoy his touch. Without fully realizing it, you pressed yourself a little harder against him which earnt you a groan right near your ear.

“Easy there.” He warned you, his fingers gently digging into your hip.

You shuddered in response. You were too aware of his fingers, of his lips near your ear. You wanted to feel his lips on your skin. Desperately.

You couldn’t remember when was the last time a guy made you feel this way. He hadn’t even properly touch you (yet, hopefully) and yet you couldn’t ignore how uncomfortably wet you got. You wanted him, badly.

Without even knowing his name. 

“There you are!” Minhyuk’s familiar voice brought you back. It was almost like his gentle voice broke a spell.

Your savior instantly let go of your body; you almost whimpered at the loss of his heat, cursing silently your friend for interrupting.

“I was looking for you everywhere. One moment you were by the bar and then nothing.” He eyed you with a frown, almost as if he was worried for you.

It was funny how at the beginning of the night you would have been delighted to hear him, to see him worrying over you. But now? You were almost annoyed.

You glanced at your new partner. He smiled at you, cute dimples showing. Could he get any handsomer? His smile, however, faded the moment his eyes landed on Minhyuk. Oh how quickly his face transformed; he didn’t look like a nice guy any longer. His eyes were hard, face dark and if you didn’t know better, you would have thought he was about to pounce on Minhyuk.

“I-“ You faced Minhyuk, unsure of what you wanted to say. Did you want to explain yourself? Did you want to tell him to leave the two of you alone?

“Do you want to leave?” Minhyuk asked instead

You glanced over your shoulder only to see that your savior was nowhere to be found. That was quick.

“Yeah.”

❀

You knew you were dreaming because you found yourself in an empty dark street. All the lights were out and the town was dead silent which simply couldn’t happen if it wasn’t a dream.

Your city was always full of life whether it was day or night, it didn’t matter. Therefore, you decided that it was another of those weird dreams. You almost expected this dream to turn into another nightmare; maybe another monster would pop out of nowhere and start chasing you. You almost laughed at the thought. How could you be so ready for another nightmare?

It didn’t happen.

You looked around the street. Your only source of light happened to be the moon which would have been romantic if it wasn’t for the silence. It was too silent. No honks, no animals, you couldn’t even hear the wind. The town seemed simply dead.

Uneasy, you started walking down the street, maybe in hope to find something that made sense with this dream, maybe in hope that eventually the dream would change or maybe you would simply wake up.

None of it happened. No matter how long you walked (which felt like hours), nothing changed. Your surroundings stayed exactly the same. Same street, same gloomy atmosphere.

Until it did.

You halted in your track, body turning cold. There was definitely something wrong with the dream. You couldn’t exactly pinpoint why it suddenly felt like you were in danger but it did. You wrapped your arms tightly around yourself, trying to reassure yourself, to keep your mind clear. Whatever was about to happen, you could deal with it.

And then, you felt it. A warm breath caressed your nape causing goosebumps all over your body.

“Hello friend.”

That voice, you knew it, yet at the same time it sounded different. You forced your body to come out of shock and move as far as possible from the person behind you.

The man that stood in the middle of the street looked just as beautiful as in your memory except for the fact that he felt completely different. You gawked at him, hands shaking, you couldn’t stop yourself from feeling like you were in danger and you needed to run.

Whenever he could read your mind or not - he smiled wickedly, eyes glowing bright red. He licked his lips, eyes never leaving yours. You were a prey and he would not let you leave so easily.

“Who are you?” You finally found your voice and asked. A part of you didn’t want to know who he was. It couldn’t be the same man; the one you met at the club didn’t look or sound that dangerous, the one before you on the other hand felt like pure evil.

His wicked smile only grew at your question. Instead of answering you, he got out of your sight for a second, only to reappear right in front of you. He grabbed your arm, tightly, his hand burning your skin.

“Don’t worry, doll, you’ll find out very soon.” Was the last thing you heard.

❀

Your eyes snapped open; a scream of pure terror left your lips. Heart hampering in your chest, you panted, badly, unable to control your breathing. You shut your eyes tightly and counted till you regained some calmness.

And here you thought dreaming about spirits was terrifying. This dream felt too real. The fear, the pain, even now that you were fully awake you still felt it. At the memory of the pain, you switched the light on and quickly rolled your sleeve; there was no way any of it was real. And yet a bright red handprint was there.

“No, no, no, no.” You repeated to yourself while rubbing your arm. It wasn’t real. You were completely fine. Or maybe, you did hurt yourself but only because the dream was so intense.

You took a deep breath, your gaze locked on the bright mark.

You were not losing your mind.

❀

Thinking that after a long weekend of resting and relaxing your awful dreams and episodes of hurting yourself would stop was a mistake. You hadn’t gotten a proper sleep for a week and it was slowly driving you crazy. You didn’t know what was the cause of those nightmares. No, that was a lie, your life took a tragic turn from the moment you used the Ouija board.

For a while, you refused to think about that night, for the sake of your sanity. However, with the past events it made it harder not to think about it. Something was definitely going on and your brain was trying to make you understand.

You sighed for the hundredth time this morning. You were tired, dizzy and in big need of sleep. You could barely concentrate on your work. Talk with people? Hardly possible; you heard them and yet couldn’t fully process what they were saying.

Soojin pulled a chair beside you and faced you, a scowl on her face. “Want to talk about it?”

Despite her sitting close to you, you barely heard her. “What?”

“You look tired as hell. I think in all our years of friendship I’ve never seen you like this.”

This simple statement brought tears to your eyes. Soojin was right, you had never felt this exhausted in your life.

“I can’t sleep.” You finally admitted.

There were plenty of disadvantages with not being able to sleep. Obviously, the tiredness was the main problem but it wasn’t the only issue. No, being deprived of sleep made you cranky as hell, unable to concentrate on anything and the worst was probably you seeing things that couldn’t be real therefore weren’t really there.

“What do you mean you can’t sleep? As in insomnia?” Soojin leaned closer and touched your forehead. “Girl, you’re burning.”

Fever? Oh yeah, another problem to deal with.

“I keep having nightmares. I wake up in the middle of the night, screaming and sweating. Sometimes I wake up with wounds on my arms.” You rolled your sleeves to show the different handprints. Not all of them came from the man that looked like your savior, but oddly enough his stayed when others faded, eventually.

Soojin gasped loudly at the sight of the different red marks on your arms. She grabbed your hands, gently tug to get a better look. “This is insane.”

“You tell me.”

❀

Back to present

‘Move’ you told your body. You had to move, to put some space between you and the demon. So, you ran and switched the light on, almost as if you expected the man to disappear, to prove to your tired brain that it was all a hallucination. And to your surprise, as soon as light came, he was nowhere to be seen.

Should you have felt relieved? Definitely. Were you relieved? Not really. Rightfully so.

“Boo.” A voice came right from behind you.

You shrieked, startled which only made him laugh as you stumbled. A hand on your heart, you didn’t think for a moment you would survive the night with his presence – he was driving you crazy and not in a nice way.

“You can’t be real.” You muttered half to yourself half to him. Despite all the evidences right before your eyes, you still couldn’t come with terms that all this time it was him and he was not human. It just didn’t make sense.

“Oh, but I am, love.” He purred, clearly satisfied with your reaction. He was patient, for a demon at least, and now that he had finally showed himself to you, he couldn’t help but enjoy the moment a little too much. “You’re such a sweet little thing.”

“No, no, no.” You shook your head in denial. “I refuse.”

He chuckled and took a step forward while you stepped back, refusing to let him come any closer to you. As if you could stop him. He smiled wickedly at you; he kept walking towards you, unbothered by your lame attempt at staying away from you. You realized too late that he had you trapped between him and the wall.

“Nice attempt.” He mocked, leaning closer.

His face was inches from yours and despite your initial fear, you couldn’t help yourself but admire his handsome face. A demon was supposed to represent a sin and the ‘man’ standing before you was definitely a walking sin. It shouldn’t be allowed.

You pressed yourself even harder against the wall, wishing it could swallow you whole and help you escape from the demon.

“You know, I didn’t expect you to play again with an oujia board. Not after last time.”

“Why are you doing this to me?”

“Why? Because it’s fun!”

“Fun?” You repeated, irritated. All this time you thought you were losing your mind, only to find out that your problems were all because of one person. Just because someone thought it was fun.

Outraged, you forgot for a moment that he wasn’t a simple man but a demon, and pushed him as hard as you could. “Fun? I’m not some toy you can play with! Don’t you ever dare mess with me again!”

Your little outburst took him out of guard. He saw fire in your eyes; you weren’t scared of him any longer and were ready to fight him with all your being if it meant to get your life under control.

He was tempted to push your buttons, to see just how much you could endure before losing yourself.

“Get out.” You ordered

As much as you wanted him to leave you alone, you didn’t believe that he would actually listen to you, he just didn’t seem like someone who would listen to other’s wishes.

But he did.

❀

You woke up this morning feeling refreshed and suspiciously at peace. No weird dreams, no nightmares and no demon waiting for you. It was refreshing. You wanted to believe that it meant it was over, no more troubles, no more weird incidents. Was it too much to ask?

For the past two days, you tried not think too much about the demon, the terribly handsome demon but you quickly realized it was impossible. You couldn’t simply erase his face from your memory and even less forget how warm his skin felt against yours. You hated yourself for thinking about him in this way, from being so affected and seeing how your treacherous body reacted to him. Instead of despising him for how vulnerable he made you feel by haunting you, you found yourself wishing he had done something else.

“You’re crazy, Y/N.” You told yourself

You sighed and closed your eyes to enjoy the last drops of water. A good night of sleep and a nice warm shower and you felt like you were ready to fight the world. You hadn’t felt this way for days – it felt good. 

You stepped out of your shower, humming to yourself and stopped. Leaning against the door was the demon. His arms, and damn those muscular arms, crossed over his chest, he was openly staring at your naked body, smirking.

“The hell!” You screamed and grabbed your towel to hide your body. “Get out!”

Your anger didn’t faze him as he remained against the door, his eyes roaming over your half-hidden body. His eyes lingered on your legs and then slowly moved to your face. He licked his lips hungrily. You were definitely a sweet thing he wanted to play with.

You gulped nervously under his gaze. You wanted to hold onto your anger and outrage but his eyes and the way he licked his lips made it almost impossible. Your body warmed up instantly, reacting to him in a way it shouldn’t.

“I said, get out!” You repeated but even to your ears you didn’t sound convincing.

He chuckled and of course didn’t listen to your order. Not this time. Instead, he walked towards you, a predator getting closer to its prey.

“Why should I when I have such a nice view?” He stopped inches from you.

He was too close; you could feel his warmth. Or maybe you were simply too aware of him. Instead of trying to get away from him like you should, your feet stayed rooted to the floor, eyes locked on him.

“Why are you here?” You managed to ask, your grip on your towel tightening as if your life depended on it. Your life certainly didn’t but your sanity definitely did.

The man before you smiled wickedly at your question. He put a finger under your chin and tilted your head up. “Why? Isn’t it obvious, doll? You wanted me here.”

Your gasped at his touch. “I-I didn’t.”

“No?” He sounded amused as he leaned dangerously closer. His absolutely kissable lips so close, all you needed was lean in and you could taste them. “You little liar.”

It was unfair how enthralled you were with him. He didn’t do anything to deserve this kind of reaction from you, in fact you should be screaming and kicking but no, you let him control you.

You wanted to defend yourself, excuses on the tip of your tongue and yet no words left your lips because deep inside you knew he was right - you were a liar.

“What do you want?”

“What do you think I want, doll?” He hummed, his finger moving slowly, feather like touches, from your neck to your collarbone.

‘Me’ you wanted to say but that would be playing his game and you didn’t want to. Not so easily.

As his finger was getting dangerously closer to the edge of your towel, you tightened your grip in case he tried something.

“Why are you trying so hard to resist me?” He asked, his fingers halting on your towel. “Is it because of that guy? Do you think he can fuck you better than me?”

The mention of Minhyuk was what broke the hold he had on you. You scoffed and pushed him away from you.

“You need to stop doing that.”

“Doing what?”

“Controlling me.” You refused to elaborate, to admit that you felt a strong attraction.

He chuckled at your assumption. “Oh doll, you think I’m trying to control you? I don’t need to.” He eyed you from head to toe, “My presence enhances your feelings, that’s all. I can do nothing about it.”

He had to be lying, you told yourself. It was easier to think that he was the origin of this attraction but judging by how calm he was, you had to come with terms that maybe it was your own fault.

You bit on your lips, frustrated with him and with yourself.

“What’s your name?” You finally asked. You couldn’t keep calling him ‘the demon’ and considering how often you had been seeing him (and you guessed it was just the beginning) you might as well know his name.

“I have many names,” He started

“Spare me with that.” You interrupted, not caring any longer if you sounded rude or that you were provoking him. You just didn’t care anymore.

He rolled his eyes in response. “Wooyoung. You can call me Wooyoung.”

You liked his name, but that, of course, you kept to yourself.

“Great, Wooyoung. Now get out and please don’t come back.”

❀

When Minhyuk invited you to his birthday party, you expected it to be small with his group of friends. How wrong you were.

His flat was crowded with so many unfamiliar faces, it made you pause for a moment and wonder if you were in the right place. You knew, of course, he was a social butterfly but not to this extent.

For a moment you tried to look for Minhyuk, he was the birthday boy after all, but with the dim light and the crowd, it made your mission impossible. With a long sigh, you chose to go to the improvised bar instead, judging that you would eventually find him. Or he would find you.

Luckily for you, you didn’t stay alone for long. Without surprise, you found Soojin sipping her beer by the bar, watching people with her typical judging gaze (you smiled at that).

“I knew I’d find you here.” She grabbed another bottle and handed it to you. “Thanks babe.”

“You’re finally here! I’m bored.” Soojin whined and wrapped her arm around yours.

“You? Bored? Now that doesn’t sound like you at all.”

She nudged you with her hips. “I didn’t expect Minhyuk to turn his flat into a night club, too many people and they look all dull.”

“Oh come on, you can’t be sure of that. Have you tried talking to any of them?”

Soojin completely ignored your comment (but stuck her tongue out) and instead observed your face. “You look better.”

That you did. Wooyoung was nowhere to be seen which resulted in you sleeping like a baby. No more nightmares, no more hallucinations, it was great. “Yeah. Back to normal.”

Or almost.

“There comes my favorite girl!” Before you could even react to Minhyuk’s voice, his arms were already around you, bringing you into a big, warm hug.

“Finally!” Soojin raised her bottle, “Happy birthday, asshole!”

“Lovely, as always.” Minhyuk let go of you but only for a moment, he had one hand on your hip, rubbing gently as he faced your friend. “But thank you. I’m glad you came.” And then he looked at you. “Especially you.”

Soojin rolled her eyes, disgusted with the sudden display of affection (that took you of guard). You, on the other hand, were simply confused at his rather odd behavior. Yes, you were close and of course you were happy with his comment, but he had to be drunk to suddenly be so touchy.

“Minhyuk, are you drunk?” You nudged him playfully, putting some space between you two.

It was odd how weeks ago, you would have let him touch you freely, and yet tonight it didn’t feel right. You blamed Wooyoung for this too, he had completely fucked up with your brain.

“No!” He protested too quickly and giggled, “Okay, maybe a little.” He cupped your face between his hands and leaned closer. “You look so pretty, Y/N.”

“Oh my god. I should definitely film him. That some nice blackmail material.” Soojin laughed

However, before she could do that, Minhyuk’s hold on your face tightened making you wince. His eyes were no longer on your face but at something or someone behind you. You had a sick feeling that someone was indeed staring intensely at you – a cold shiver ran down your spine.

“What is he doing here?” Minhyuk groaned more to himself than to you but you heard him nevertheless.

His question got you curious. Who was behind you? And especially, who could turn the sweet and drunk Minhyuk into a frowning, upset guy?

“Did you bring him with you?” He asked you

“Wh-what?” It took you by surprise. You removed his hands from your face and glanced over your shoulder.

At the sight of Wooyoung standing by the window, your heart missed a beat. He looked terribly attractive in all black; black jeans, black turtleneck and rolled sleeves revealing his strong, veiny arms. He smirked at the attention, clearly unfazed with Minhyuk’s glare.

You were in trouble.

“No.” You finally answered, averting your eyes from Wooyoung. “Why would I bring him? I don’t know him.” Oh Y/N, you were such a little liar, Wooyoung was right.

“The hell.” Minhyuk muttered under his breath. He ignored your response. Eyes on Wooyoung, he left both you and Soojin, walking straight to Wooyoung with clenched fist.

“Minhyuk, no!” You thought you knew drunk Minhyuk, but apparently you didn’t. If he was looking for a fight with someone ‘normal’, you would have let him (maybe not) but you worried for him since he was picking a fight with a demon, without even knowing it. “Bloody hell.”

“Well, what a surprise.” Soojin commented. She put her now empty bottle on the table and got by your side. She followed your gaze and whistled at the sight. “I’m not going to comment on Minhyuk’s behavior, but damn the guy he’s facing? He’s hella hot.”

Yes, he was but you didn’t say it out loud.

“Oh shit.” You gasped as Minhyuk grabbed Wooyoung by his collar, bringing him closer to him.

Without even realizing it, your body moved on its own in their direction.

“Y/N!” Soojin quickly grabbed your arm and pulled you back, worried of what you were about to do. “Don’t.”

Your eyes went back and forth between Soojin and the two men. You bit on your lips, unsure of what you were supposed to do. Did you want to watch them fight? Did you want to save Minhyuk from Wooyoung? Or did you just want to make sure nothing happens to Wooyoung? The later seemed so impossible, and yet your heart was beating crazily.

“Let them be.” Soojin advised you and shook her head. “Men.”

For a second, you caught Wooyoung’s gaze, he seemed completely unbothered with Minhyuk’s display of strength and anger. The moment his eyes met yours, he smiled, a devilish smile. Oh he was up to nothing good.

‘Please don’t.” You mouthed hoping he could get your message.

Wooyoung got effortlessly rid of Minhyuk, one swift move and he was free. You expected Minhyuk to fight back but he took you off guard by walking away.

Wooyoung glanced at you one last time before vanishing from your sight in a blink.

“The hell.”

❀

“I wonder what people would say about you if they knew you let a demon play with you.” Wooyoung chuckled before planting another kiss on your inner thigh, enjoying the contact with your skin.

You whimpered at the touch, desperate for more. He had been toying with you for what felt like hours. Hands traveling down your body; every touch setting your skin on fire. If you were in your right state of mind, you would have been embarrassed by how whiny and wet he got you. Instead, you tried to wriggle under him, to get closer, to make him stop playing.

“Wouldn’t they say that you’re a little whore, hm?” He hummed against your skin, lips slowly moving from your knee back to your inner thigh, getting awfully close to where you needed him and yet never giving you what you wanted.

“I don’t care!” You snapped, patience wearing thin. You tried to grab him, to push him against you but Wooyoung was faster and so much stronger. With one swift move he was back, hovering over you with your arms completely pinned above your head.

“Don’t think so, doll.” He smirked at how fucked you looked without him doing much. You were completely at his mercy and he knew he had little to do before you would start begging him to take you. Wooyoung leaned closer, lips so close, so tempting – you wanted him to kiss you, so you tried to move but he pulled back, toying with you. “Tsk, so impatient, doll.”

“You’re an asshole.” Wouldn’t it be so nice to kick him just to get rid of your frustration? It would be, but of course, you did none of that. Instead, you groaned. “You can’t keep doing that.”

Wooyoung smiled in response, watching you like a prey, squirming under him. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

You would have punched him if you could, instead, you nudged him as hard as you could with your leg to make a point (sadly, it only made him laugh; a very cute and annoying laugh).

“Wooyoung, I swear-“ He didn’t let you finish, instead, he, rudely, interrupted you with a kiss. A hot and needy kiss. For all his talk, and his self-control, you found out he was just as desperate as you judging by the strength of the kiss. He let go of your wrists and immediately you wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him even closer to you, pressing your body against his to deepen the kiss. You let your fingers rake through his hair before pulling at them harshly (he deserved it) making him groan against your lips.

“Know that you’re going to regret that, doll.” He warned you, biting your lip.

“You’re all bark and no bite, babe.” You mocked, fully realizing that pushing his buttons would either get you in trouble (because come on he was a demon) or you would finally get what you wanted.

Wooyoung’s pulled from you but his fingers found your chin, thumb caressing your lower lip. His eyes glowed brighter than ever at your daring words. “You’re so going to eat your words, love.”

And just like that, he slid slowly down your body, eyes never leaving yours. He took it slowly, gently, too gently considering how threatening he wanted to sound, but maybe you should have paid more attention to his eyes, to see the mischievous glimpse.

Nestled between your thighs, he bit harshly your thigh, making sure to leave a mark. A complain was already on the tip of your tongue (because come on, how long was he planning on playing with you) before finally, as if he sensed what you were about to do, you felt the press of his lips on your clit. It was so soft, you could barely register and yet you felt a wave of pleasure. Finally.

Something that started softly quickly turned into something else. Mouth working between your legs, he was ruthless; sucking, lapping, he knew exactly what he was doing, turning you into a moaning mess. You grabbed his hair, tugging at his locks and pushing his head closer to your heat.

“Wooyoung,” You moaned

“All mine.” Wooyoung growled, a very animalistic (that got you even wetter if it was possible) growl. “He will never have you.”

Feeling completely overwhelmed, you couldn’t proceed his words, not his claim on you nor the mention of ‘he’.

“Look at me, doll.” He suddenly stopped and hovered over you. Gently, he stroked your face, almost lovingly, if he was capable of that. “Now, look at him. Look and tell him he would never have you.”

Puzzled, you followed his gaze only for your eyes to widen in shock. Minhyuk was sitting in the corner of your room, unmoving, with his fists clenched. Your eyes locked for a second and you knew, deep inside, that you should be ashamed, you should push Wooyoung off you, but you couldn’t. You tore your eyes off him and looked at Wooyoung, staring at this odd demon.

“If you stop, I swear I’m going to punch you.” You warned him

You couldn’t tell him what he wanted to hear, not wanting to flatter his already big ego, but your words and your eagerness seemed to be enough. He glanced at Minhyuk; a triumphant smile plastered all over his face – he had won this round.

Wooyoung spread your legs wider as he went back, lips around your clit, sucking hard. Your legs started to shake with all the attention; you arched your back as you felt so close to your release. So close.

Until he stopped.

❀

You jolted in your bed, sweating and feeling incredibly hot and sticky. No wonder, considering your dream. You knew beforehand that you having a wet dream about Wooyoung meant he was back with his games and you weren’t sure how you felt about it. Frustrated? Amused? Scared? All at once.

“Fuck you!” You finally let out loudly, confident that he was hiding in the darkness of your room, watching your misery with amusement.

Oh how right you were.

Wooyoung appeared right beside you, laying on your bed, completely unbothered with your cute, according to him, outburst.  “Hi doll.”

“You!” You pointed an accusing finger at him, “Stupid demon! Stop messing with me!”

Wooyoung chuckled in response, shifting on the bed so he could face you better. “You know, doll, you’re the first human who dares to insult me and yet is still alive.”

This sentence alone should have shut you up and shrink away from him, however, considering your level of frustration, you forgot all about the fact that he was a sinful creature that could probably snap your neck in a second.

“So what? How does it feel?” You snapped back instead.

Wooyoung quirked a brow at you. He had to admit he was pleasantly surprised with your sudden confidence. He took all his time to answer your question, eyes roaming your half-exposed body; from your exposed legs, to your exposed shoulder (since your long t-shirt refused to stay on place), to your lips. Those sweet lips. He licked his lips, eyes not leaving your lips.

“Aroused.” He admitted, smiling shamelessly

Whatever witty comeback you had, died the moment he confessed. The little shit surely knew how to leave you speechless and confused. How much you hated him (that was half true but he didn’t need to know that).

Realizing all too late how exposed you were, you grabbed your blanket, in panic, and pulled it over your body. It was stupid and completely pointless but it still made you feel safer. Just a tiny bit.

“Really, doll?” He laughed and grabbed the blanket. You gripped it tightly, preparing for him to tug at it (as if you had a chance in winning). Without surprise, he yanked it from you, exposing your body once more to his eyes. He licked his lips, admiring the view. “You’re so sweet.”

Wooyoung moved slowly, maybe on purpose or maybe to give you the chance to push him away or to scream at him. You did none of that, hypnotize with his predator-like grace as he got closer to you. His hands found their way to your thighs, featherlike touches that sent an all too familiar wave of pleasure. You shivered in both fear and excitement. Fear, because your body was too responsive to his touch. Excitement, because you wanted to see how far he was ready to go with you.

Gently, he pulled your legs apart to nestle between them. He inhaled sharply; with just one look he knew how, embarrassingly, wet you were. “Sweet. I wonder who got you this wet, love.”

“Definitely not you.” You stubbornly commented. “But please, do touch me.”

To your utter surprise, a genuine smile spread on Wooyoung’s face and you had to admit that to see such sincerity on his handsome face terrified you way more than his usual expression.

“Not today, doll.” He kissed your forehead and then, everything turned black.

❀

“Okay, what’s up with your cranky ass?” Soojin plopped on the chair in front of you, frowning at you.

It was finally lunch break and you chose to meet at your favorite restaurant near your work place. It was crowded, like always, but luckily for you, your favorite table was free (in fact, you suspected your favorite waitress reserved it especially for you). You had the perfect view on the window, watching people go on with their lives.

Soojin’s voice brought you back to reality; averting your eyes from the street, you looked at your friend who clearly was concerned with your state of mind.

“Nothing.” It was obviously a lie and Soojin didn’t buy it.

As much as it pained you to admit it, you were indeed cranky, borderline annoyed with everybody but also with yourself. And Wooyoung. Especially with him. The little shit.

You couldn’t believe he used, whatever power he had, on you. Worse yet, he dared to leave you alone and frustrated, after making sure you were so wound up. Every time, the dream crossed your mind, it made you grind your teeth and clench your fist (and maybe a tad bit excited). You promised to yourself that the next time you see him; you would make him pay (as if you had any power on him).

“Is it about Minhyuk?” Soojin wondered

“Who?” You blinked, taken aback by how quick you answered and realized your mistake. “No.”

Soojin arched an amused brow at you. There was no doubt, she was surprised with the idea of you having another guy on mind. “There’s another guy I’m not aware about?”

‘Shit.’ You bit on your cheek, forcing yourself not to slap yourself. If only you weren’t so distracted, then maybe you wouldn’t find yourself in this situation.

“I can’t believe you kept it to yourself!” Soojin whined and playfully slapped your arm. “I’m your best friend! How dare you?”

You sighed in defeat. She was right, you weren’t the kind of people who kept things from her best friend, and definitely not a guy. But really, what could you tell her about Wooyoung? ‘Hi, I’ve been haunted by a demon ever since we had a séance at your place. He’s annoying but actually hella hot and I want to fuck him.’ You couldn’t tell her that.

“I’m sorry. I just-“ You started to say, trying to find the right words to justify yourself. But really, you had no valid excuses.

“Come on, I’m listening.” She crossed her arms over her chest, trying to look as stern as possible but her eyes were glowing with mischief. She was ready to laugh and tease the hell out of you.

You took a deep breath, answer on the tip of your tongue and then, forgot all about it the moment your eyes landed on the person standing outside, on the sidewalk. You couldn’t believe your eyes. Just when you thought, you couldn’t get any angrier, Wooyoung proved you wrong.

“Oh you piece of shit.” You groaned under your nose.

Without giving any explanations to Soojin or even giving her time to react, you ran outside. Eyes locked, you forgot all about the people around you or the fact that crossing the road without looking was probably the dumbest thing you had ever done, but your annoyance silenced the rational and reasonable part of you. All you could think about was getting to him as fast as you could (and before he could vanish) and share a piece of your mind (and if you could punch his smug face, it would be a bonus).

But were you lucky? Not when the stupid demon was concerned. Before you could reach him and express your annoyance, you tripped. Like a damn fool. Before your pretty face could meet the rather dirty pavement, Wooyoung caught you. One hand held your forearm while the other was pressed against your back.

“Someone’s too happy to see me.” Wooyoung chuckled

You should be appalled by how quickly your treacherous body responded to him; a laugh and a touch and you felt your insides melt. There was definitely something wrong with you. Instead of punching him like you initially planned, you found yourself staring at him, lips slightly parted, you were completely hypnotized and there was no saving.

“Cat got your tongue, doll?”

You cleared your throat, embarrassed with your own reaction, and punched his chest. Lamely.

“Asshole.”

“Lovely as always.”

Wooyoung’s smile was terrifying. Not because it was actually ugly and horrifying – far from it. But as a demon, he shouldn’t be allowed to look both cute and handsome while smiling; wide smile with absolutely adorable dimples – you had to fight the urge to poke his cheeks.

“You’re staring, doll.”

‘You too’, you wanted to say but no sound left your mouth. His closeness was making it hard for you, to think, to breathe. In fact, all you could do was stare and wonder what it would be like to kiss him.

“Y/N.” For the first time since you met him, he called you by your name and to say that you didn’t die a little inside would be a lie. You liked it. A little too much.

“Sorry to interrupt,” Soojin’s familiar and sweet voice echoed from behind you, causing you to jump and put some distance between you and Wooyoung. You looked at her, half dazed half guilty. You were in deep shit.

“Here.” She handed you your bag with a wicked smile that was definitely as evil as Wooyoung’s, promising you a very slow death if you dared not to call her later to spill the beans. “Take your afternoon off.”

❀

You had to admit that spending a whole afternoon with the person that used to haunt you was the weirdest thing you had ever done in your life. You should have been worried about your sanity for actually liking it, but instead of worrying about it, you chose to fully enjoy the moment and forget all about your anger.

Wooyoung, despite being a demon, an evil thing, was not what you imagined a demon to be. He was a natural flirt (you stopped counting how many times he made you blush), fond of pickup lines (and you were a big sucker for it), funny and sounded and acted like a normal human being. It was disconcerting but you enjoyed it too much to complain.

This was how you found yourself at your place, nestled cozily in your couch, watching Netflix and eating pizza. A normal, friendly activity you would say.

“I wonder,” You started as you shifted to watch Wooyoung. “How come a demon showed up when we were trying to talk to a spirit? Like, is it normal?”

Wooyoung, who was about to take another bite of his slice of pizza, halted. This was not a question he expected from you. He cleared his throat and quickly regained his composure. “I did not expect that.”

That made you smirk. “Did I take you off guard?” You were a tad proud, you had to admit.

“Wipe that proud smirk, doll.”

“Or what?”

Wooyoung pinched your arm in response, making you yelp and put some additional space between you, just in case he would try again. “Not nice.”

“Never said I was.” And just like that he took you once more by surprise as he stuck his tongue out. “As for your initial question, I felt a strong pull, almost as if I was being summoned. Obviously, I wasn’t. I was shocked to see two kids with an Ouija board.” He laughed at the memory.

Wooyoung could still picture your face, so stern and half annoyed with the actual game; one look at you and he could guess that you didn’t believe in spirits. Your friend, on the other hand, was so excited, waiting for something to happen. “You looked so stern; I could tell you didn’t believe in any of that.”

You snorted at that. Not so long ago you still didn’t believe in ghost and yet now you got all cozy with a demon.

Wooyoung grabbed gently your hand, playing with your fingers. “It was so tempting to scare you. And then imagine my surprise, ten years later, I felt the pull again and I just knew it was you.”

Hearing him talk about the pull made you feel a kind of way. You should feel annoyed that he had been messing with you, but instead you almost felt special.

“So, instead of talking to me, you decided to mess with my life.” You gave him your best stern look (but really all you wanted was to laugh).

Wooyoung smiled sheepishly at you. “Guilty. I couldn’t resist.”

You found yourself smiling back at him. “I have something else I want you to ask about.”

Wooyoung arched a brow, clearly someone had been particularly curious tonight – he didn’t mind. But once more, you took him by surprise; you moved swiftly from your spot only to get on top of him, straddling his thighs. Confident and with a playful smile plastered on your face, you wrapped your arms around his neck. Clearly, he wasn’t the only one who could play, you could too and judging by how tense he got, you won this round.

“You keep provoking me but you never really touch me.” You thought about the night he got you all bothered only to leave you alone. You thought about it over and over and you just couldn’t understand why he wouldn’t touch you.

Wooyoung closed his eyes for a moment and sighed. He should have guessed you would actually ask this question. He leaned closer to you and gently stroked your cheek with his thumb. “Because I’m a demon. It will leave a mark on you, taint you and I don’t want that for you.”

Your body reacted on its own by pressing your face into his hand. His words made your heart flutter; you had a handsome demon in your flat, sitting on him and instead of being evil like he was supposed to, he was being sweet and considerate. Honestly, you didn’t know whether you should cry or laugh. Were you growing fond of him? Absolutely.

“Don’t think I don’t want you, doll.” He grabbed your hips, grip so tight you were sure it would leave a bruise. He pressed you harder against him, making you feel him, making you understand just how much he wanted you. He was hard. Damn hard. You couldn’t stop yourself from moving, grinding against him.

Wooyoung’s eyes turned red as a groan escaped his lips. “Doll.”

Despite his warning, he didn’t stop you. He watched your every move, every little whimper that left your pretty parted lips. He watched the way you closed your eyes to enjoy the friction and how slowly you were losing yourself. It took him all his willpower not to flip you, get rid of those clothes and just pound into you until you were begging him to let you come.

“You’ll be the death of me, doll.”

❀

When you came to work this morning, you swore to yourself that you would concentrate on your work, finish everything on your to-do list so you could get home earlier and maybe have a nice night with your favorite demon. Unfortunately for you, despite all your willpower, it appeared your body wasn’t the only traitor in this story, your brain too. Every single time you tried to concentrate on something, images of Wooyoung would pop into your mind. Images of the two of you, cuddling, laughing – you were completely smitten.

“Y/N, Y/N, Y/N. My sweet Y/N.” Soojin’s familiar voice brought you back from your dreams, back to reality. “Don’t think I forgot about you. You have so much to tell me about!” She plopped on the chair and grabbed your hands, her sweet smile turning into a wicked one – you gulped, nervous. You should have prepared yourself for your best friend’s question but clearly, your mind was somewhere far from here.

“I-“ You cleared your throat, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Oh now you don’t know? Should I refresh your mind then?” You didn’t really want her to remind you but that was not negotiable. “You, middle of the street and a hella handsome guy that looked kinda familiar but I can’t remember from where.” She paused, thought about it for a moment, “Does he have hot friends?”

You forgot all about the pressure just like that. You burst into laughter and ran your fingers through your hair. “I met him at a club.”

❀

Despite all your talk about being efficient today, you were anything but which resulted in you staying way too late at work. Sadly, for you, all your plans for the night seemed to be far away now.

You sighed, tired and half depressed. You loved your work, you really did, but sometimes, especially at busy times, you got easily overwhelmed. Because you loved your work, you would forget about yourself and would, without even realizing it, overwork yourself.

It was past nine when you found yourself walking from your work; the weather was lovely so instead of taking the bus, you chose to walk and enjoy the moment.

Without surprise, your thoughts quickly turned to Wooyoung, wondering if he would visit you tonight – you hoped he would. It worried you how badly you wanted to see him, to touch him, you shouldn’t be so attached to him for so many reasons. Being so close to him was dangerous and you were pretty sure nothing good would really come out of this odd, yet so heart fluttering relationship.

But could you really stop yourself? The answer was simple: no.

“Hey miss!” A man’s voice interrupted your trail of thoughts. Annoyed, you glanced at the group of men sitting on the stairs, looking like a they owned the world. You knew they were trouble with just one glance.

“This dress looks amazing on you.” Another commented

You closed your eyes for a second and took a deep breath. Inhale, exhale, repeat. ‘Keep walking. Ignore those idiots, you don’t need a fight.’ You told yourself, when really, all you wanted was to walk towards them and share a piece of your mind. With a nice punch. You did none of that, of course. For once in your life, you listened to the little voice that told you to walk away. Fast.

“Oh come on.” One of the men jumped from his place and quickly blocked your way. “Don’t be like that.”

You glared at the man before you, angrily. The audacity. You were growing more and more annoyed; fist clenched, all he needed was to make a step towards you and you wouldn’t hesitate to punch his face.

You still refused to answer him and apparently, he didn’t like it judging by the frown on his face. His friends quickly joined you, surrounding you. So maybe, you didn’t feel that confident anymore. It was one thing to deal with one idiot, but it was a whole other story if others were involved. You could fight, but not so many of them at the same time.

If from outside you managed to look tough, inside you were worried.

“What’s wrong, missy? Cat got your tongue?” The man before you mocked and took a step towards you, getting slowly closer and closer to you.

As he slowly was getting closer, you weighed your options. Trying to run seemed like the best option and yet with the three other men surrounding you, it didn’t seem possible. Fighting could be another option but it seemed like the worst one – you would not come out unhurt.

‘Fuck it.’ You told yourself, fist curled, you were ready to punch the guy and then run for your life.

None of it happened. Before the man could even think about reaching you, a dark silhouette appeared right in front of you, lifting the man from the ground by his neck. A little yelp of surprise escaped your lips. You knew the person before you. A little too well. Wooyoung had found you and he was not amused. You couldn’t see his face but you could tell he was pissed; his body tensed, the aura surrounding him was pure rage.

To your utter surprise, the three other men didn’t try to help his friend – feet rooted to the ground, they were both taken aback and terrified with how easily Wooyoung lifted their friend.

“Give me one reason. One good reason not to kill you.” Wooyoung growled

Oh yes, he was furious. His voice was darker than ever and even if his fury wasn’t directed at you, you couldn’t help but shiver and cower behind him. Those guys just didn’t know with who they messed.

You bit on your lips, torn between the wish to see how far he was ready to go for you (you had little trouble to imagine him killing for you) and to save those men from a fate probably worse than death.

“Wooyoung.” You called for him. No success. He didn’t even flinch at your voice, too lost in his own feelings. You got closer to him and put your shaky hand on his arm. “Wooyoung.”

He grunted but complied. He looked at you, eyes red and glowing, filled with anger and hatred, but at the sight of you, for a brief moment his eyes softened.

Honestly, there was definitely something wrong with you. Instead of cowering under his gaze, you found yourself getting hot. And apparently, Wooyoung felt the shift too. He inhaled sharply, scenting you.

“You’re terrible.” He whispered only for you, a smirk forming on his pretty face.

You chose to ignore the fact that he could read you so easily or the fact that he could sense your arousal. “Let them go. They’re not worth your time.”

If Wooyoung had to listen to his demon’s urges, those men would be dead, souls sent straight to hell – he loved the idea of making them suffer for eternity. But you, you made everything harder. He couldn’t resist those pretty eyes, looking hopefully at him, smelling so good.

“As you wish.” He threw the man on the ground few meters from you. With a blink of an eye, he had his arms wrapped tightly around you and the next moment you found yourself in the safety of your house, pressed against a wall.

“How long are you planning to drive me crazy, doll?” He pressed his head in the crook of your neck, inhaling your sweet scent. No matter how much he tried to resist the urge to take you, he found it harder with every passing day.

You ran your fingers through his hair, enjoying his proximity and his breath on your skin. “Excuse me, but as far as I’m concerned, I’m the one suffering. Not you.” With that, you tug at his locks – Wooyoung bit on your neck without hesitation in response, leaving a bright red mark.

“You have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Then, shut up and take me?”

❀

So maybe after the incident with the bunch of idiots in the street, Wooyoung started acting more protective. And maybe you found it both endearing and annoying. You would roll your eyes at him every time he would show up at the step of your workplace; of course, he knew every time when you would be finished with your day as if he felt it. But could you blame him? Definitely not. He would smile sheepishly at you, looking so damn adorable – you melted every single time.

Maybe, after giving in your desire, you finally came to terms that you weren’t simply attracted to this demon. There was something more, something deeper and it scared you. What if you gave him all of you and he would use it against you one day? What if, despite all his human trait, it was a charade? What if you were wrong?

‘Oh well.’ You told yourself with a long and tired sigh.

It was finally Friday night and after a two hours long trip to the countryside you had finally reached your parents’ place. It was isolated, a small village surrounded by a huge, dark forest. It was a nice play to visit when you wanted to escape the noisy town and when you needed to reconnect with the nature and yourself. Better yet, you could come and spend some quality time with your family.

You looked for a moment at your old house. So many generations had lived in this house, in fact, your parents still lived with your grandmother. They could have left, they tried even, but the peace and calmness of this place brought them back. You couldn’t blame them. Now that you were back, you felt all your exhaustion leave your body. This place was magical.

A fond smile grew on your face and you hurried to the door.

“I’m home!” You shouted, excited.

Your mother was the first to join, her pink apron on her; the moment she saw you, she couldn’t hold back. She screamed your name, excited and jumped at you for a bear like hug. Yeah, you were home.

❀

It was a well-known fact in your village that your grandmother was an old witch. A real witch who casted spells, who could see things that others couldn’t. Of course, your parents always told you that it was just a silly rumor that some ladies created because your grandmother could act odd from time to time. As a good daughter, you believed them and never questioned it. You witnessed some of those odd incidents that happened with her but you brushed it off. Now, however, it made you pause. What if it was true?

While talking to your parents, you noticed how your grandmother would stare at you and shake her head in disapproval. You frowned, wondering what about your life could possibly make her frown in disapproval. But maybe you already knew the answer.

“We missed you! When was the last time you came back? It feels like eternity!” Your mom complained, wiping a fake tear. Such a drama queen (but so were you).

“I think we haven’t seen her since Christmas.” Your dad added but with a gentle smile. He missed you, of course, but he understood why you didn’t come back.

“I know, I’m sorry.” You winced, feeling bad. You wanted to come back earlier but somehow, every time you thought about coming back, you would get simply busy, whether it was with work or your personal life. “I’ve been busy.”

“Busy with her boyfriend, yeah.” Your grandmother snorted and grabbed her glass.

You chocked, taken aback at her statement. There was no way it was just a remark, just a guess. Your eyes widened in shock; your eyes locked and a knowing smile grew on her face. Oh yeah. She knew.

“Oh come on, mom! Y/N would have told us if she got herself a boyfriend!” Your mom came to your defense.

If only she knew.

“I wouldn’t bet on that.”

Your mom’s eyes darted back and forth between you and your grandmother. Without the two of you talking, she understood what was going on and she didn’t like that. “You’re seeing a man?!”

Oh boy. You were in trouble.

❀

“Y/N, dear?” Your grandmother called for you. “Come here, I have something for you.”

Your grandmother sat by the fireplace with a little box resting in her hands. She looked at you more gently now which eased your mind. Maybe you were finally imagining things. Maybe you were simply too tired with the week and the trip.

You sat on the carpet, inhaling deeply. The warmth coming from the fire and the smell of wood brought back memories of your childhood and so many good times. It reminded you of nights of you sitting by the fire, resting your head on your grandmother’s knees while she would tell you stories.

“It feels really great being home.” You admitted with a fond smile on your face. “I should have come back earlier.”

Your grandmother hummed in approval. “You should.” She paused to have a good look at you. “But I understand. You’re different from us in so many ways.” She outstretched her hand and gently patted your head. “Look at you. Such a lovely woman. But you’re attracted to dangerous men.”

“He’s not that dangerous.” You whispered your lie. You knew better than to qualify Wooyoung as ‘not dangerous’ because he definitely was. But was he really a danger to you? You weren’t that sure.

Your grandmother sighed in defeat. “It runs in the family.”

“What?”

“It’s a long story. For another time.” She averted her eyes to the box in her hand. “I have a gift for you. Here.”

In the wooden box, you found a pretty, vintage necklace. You had seen it before, a very long time ago – your grandmother used to wear it.

“Consider it as a lucky charm. It had protected me for a long time.”

❀

In all honesty you hated how your brain worked. Despite your exhaustion, sleep wouldn’t come. You laid in your bed with your eyes wide open, staring at the ceiling, in the darkness of your room, playing with the necklace your grandmother gifted you. You tried everything to fall asleep; you tried to empty your mind, to count, but nothing worked.

In the darkness of your room, you thought about your grandmother and how you started to believe that the rumors about her weren’t just rumors. You thought about how much you missed Wooyoung and wondered how come he still didn’t show up. Of course, you had no way of warning him that you wouldn’t be at your place this weekend, but he always knew where to find you. So what was different this time?

With a sigh, you threw your blanket off you. There was no way you would find any sleep soon, instead, you grabbed a black hoodie and put it on. If lying in bed, did you no good, then maybe walking would help. You used to do it back when you were still living with your parents. In fact, you spent many nights walking through the forest, resting by the lake.

The night was lovely with a cool breeze caressing your face. You hummed in contentment, enjoying the moment fully as you walked through the small path leading to the lake. You didn’t need to check your surroundings; your feet remembered the way.

The moment you stepped into the clearing your smile widened at the sight of the lake. The sight of the lake brought back so many memories, you felt in peace and so light.

“I’m home.” You whispered happily

Your peace was however quickly interrupted by a very loud and angry “Where the hell have you been?!”

Startled, your heart missed a beat. Wooyoung appeared right before you, looking incredibly pissed, his eyes glowing red and you swore he growled at you. That was definitely not how you imagined meeting him. Without answering, you simply stared at him, confused with his reaction.

Wooyoung took a step towards you, fuming with rage, he tried to control himself. He didn’t want to scare you with his attitude (not that he really believed he could scare you), but his own fears got the best of him. “I’ve looked for you everywhere but no matter how much I tried, I couldn’t find you. I couldn’t feel you. It freaked me out.”

“What?” You blinked confused. “It doesn’t make sense. You-“

He interrupted you by wrapping his arms around you, crashing your body against his.

“I was scared something had happened to you and I had no idea where to look for you.” By the end of his ranting, he was shaking. You felt bad for worrying him this way, even if you didn’t understand half of what he explained.

You pushed him gently off you, only to cup his face and smile softly at him. “I’m fine, you’re fine.”

He inhaled sharply and closed his eyes, leaning further into your touch, letting you calm his nerves.

To say that you didn’t melt at his reaction would be a big fat lie. Your heart fluttered; he was too adorable for his own good and he didn’t even know that. You pecked his lips, once, twice until you saw a pout form on his face – he wanted more than a peck.

“Y/N,” he pleaded and who were you tell him no? Without hesitation you captured his lips. It wasn’t that long since your last kiss, but the moment your lips connected you sighed in delight, your body melting against his. There was no denying that you were addicted to him.

One arm wrapped tightly around you, Wooyoung lifted you from the ground bringing you as close as he could. The moment of bliss didn’t last. The moment your body collided, he hissed in both surprise and pain.

“What-“ You looked at him, taken aback. “What’s wrong?”

Wooyoung frowned, confused. He glanced at his chest; the burning sensation lingered even with you two being apart. “The hell.” But despite the shock that came with the burn, Wooyoung recognized this sensation, from a very long time ago. He looked at you, observing you, trying to find what was different with you. It didn’t take him long to figure it out. His eyes locked on your necklace; his frown only deepened.

“Where did you get that?” He pointed at your neck

“That?” Your fingers wrapped around the pendant. “It’s a gift from my grandmother.” You couldn’t help but smile but then you remembered his reaction. “What’s wrong with it?”

Wooyoung bit the inside of his cheek, pondering whether he should tell you what this pendant represented or if he should just shrug it off.

“Don’t.” You warned him, seeing the struggle in his eyes. “Tell me what’s wrong.”

“You’re getting too good at reading me.” Wooyoung sighed and shook his head. “I know this necklace; I’ve seen it before.” He outstretched his hand, fingers brushing your neck gently but halted. “There’s a spell on it preventing demons from getting too close to you.”

You should have been shocked by his statement but you weren’t. The whole evening you had been wondering whether your grandmother was a witch or not – his words only confirmed your doubts.

“Should I take it off?”

“Your sweater? Yes, please.”

You slapped his arm playfully in reply which made me chuckle. “No, keep it.”

“But it hurt you.”

“Only because I got too close to it. I’ll just avoid touching your neck.”

“No!” You complained. As if you would let him do that. You liked him touching your neck whether it was just to rub or plant kisses or choke you.

He laughed at your pained expression and wrap and arm around your shoulders. “Don’t pout like that. It gives me ideas.”

“What kind of ideas?”

“A kind that would make you blush, doll.”

Bloody demon. But you adored him.

“Walk me home?”

❀

When you suggested for Wooyoung to walk you home, you had on mind that you could slip him inside the house, unnoticed and maybe spend the night together. Your plan, however, went to hell the moment you got closer to the house. Your grandmother was, to your utter despair, perfectly awake, sitting in her favorite rocking chair on the patio, smoking a pipe. She watched the two of you getting closer, unfazed with Wooyoung’s presence.

Wooyoung let go of your hand. He put his hands in his pockets and tried to look as nonchalant as he could, but as you observed him from the side, you saw how tensed he actually was.

“So you’re the demon.” Your grandmother said. She stood up, stretching her limbs, she winced at the pain in her back.

Your grandmother, at least in your memories, was sweet and always looked gentle. Now? She looked intimidating. It was a wonder Wooyoung didn’t try to run away because you would in his shoes.

“And you’re the witch.”

She smiled, pleased with being called a witch. “What’s left of it, yes.”

Your eyes darted back and forth between the two of them, your thoughts running wild. “Hold on. Does it mean I’m a witch too?”

“You could be, if you wanted.” Your grandmother nodded which made Wooyoung winced. “Don’t make that face, demon. We’re not all bad.”

“Excuse me if I’m having a hard time believing this.” But as Wooyoung observed your grandmother, he couldn’t shake off the feeling of knowing her. He let his power wander around the place, trying to reach for her magic, only to be meet with a wall.

“Bloody witches.” Wooyoung cursed under his breath.

“I have a question.” You interrupted their little silent exchange. “My necklace? Earlier-“ you glanced at Wooyoung, trying to find the right words without getting embarrassed, “It hurt him.”

Your grandmother hummed in understanding. She was young once so she could only imagine how it happened. She winked at you (did you blush? Absolutely).

“Because this necklace is supposed to protect you from demons. Especially those trying to get too close to you.”

“But-“

“I felt him on you. His scent is all over you. I figured you’d need some protection. This necklace won’t save you if things get out of hand, but it can help.” Your grandmother explained.

Wooyoung who stayed oddly silent for the past few minutes, finally remembered where he had since this necklace before. “I’ve met you before, haven’t I?”

Now that was unexpected.

Your grandmother smiled. “Took you long to figure out.”

“You’re old.”

“And you’re still as rude as ever.”

“Do I want to know?” You asked, confused at their interaction. It got you curious, obviously. Especially because your grandmother looked delighted with how uneasy Wooyoung looked. “Wooyoung?”

He raised his arms in defeat, cursing. “Your grandmother was a very curious little witch. She summoned me when she was twelve.”

“Twelve?” You glanced at her, amazed. No wonder there were rumors about her.

“Yeah. She was curious and annoyed me to no end.” Wooyoung explained, face pained at the memory.

Your grandmother scoffed. “You were just impatient.”

“Was I? She pestered me with questions and I snapped. I tried to attack her but she wore this damn necklace.”

She nodded at the memory. “Demons are impatient and dangerous creature. And no matter how cute the two of you look together, I don’t think this relationship is a good idea.”

Angry, Wooyoung took a step forward and you had to grab his arm to stop him from getting closer to your grandmother. You didn’t trust him when it came to you and your relationship.

Your grandmother, brave woman that she was, didn’t even flinch at his display of anger. “You know I’m right. You put her in danger.”

“I can protect her!”

“I don’t doubt that but you won’t be always by her side. Moreover, you seem to forget that you’re immortal. She’s not.”

“It doesn’t matter. I’ll find her again.”

Fuck. You were falling in love.

❀

Ever since you got home from your parents’ place, Wooyoung had been showering you with so much love it was almost disgusting (according to Soojin anyway). But sweet. You bet if it came from someone else you would have hated all this attention but with Wooyoung it only made you feel loved. A kind of love that you had never experienced before. It was intense and heart melting.

When you thought he couldn’t surprise you any more, he would pop at your work place with a cup of coffee and would steal a kiss when nobody was looking before disappearing with a wink. It startled you every single time but would leave you with a big smile on your face. He certainly knew how to brighten your day.

Wooyoung surprised you even more by bringing you what looked like homemade meals almost every day. For a while, you actually refused to believe that he was the one doing the cooking, it just didn’t make sense for a demon. He, of course, proved you wrong one night. You came home late, your place smelling absolutely delicious, making you drool on the spot; only to find Wooyoung in your kitchen, cooking. He should have looked so out of place – he didn’t. Let’s say it added to the list of things you loved about him.

Tonight, however, you enjoyed the peace that came with the night. Wooyoung was sleeping beside you, for once he didn’t leave, he didn’t have any demon-business waiting for him and you enjoyed every second of it. You watched him sleeping, admiring how beautiful he looked even in his sleep.

Smiling fondly at him, you moved a little closer to him, letting your fingertips trail over his chest, drawing invisible circles. You couldn’t stop yourself from gently touching him, you were just so drawn to him. Your hand moved to his jaw, tracing its shape before moving to his lips – lips that you wanted to kiss so badly. Wooyoung grabbed your hand and opened his eyes, staring right at you.

“You can’t get enough of me.” He wiggled his brows playfully at you which made you realize that he had been awake for a while now and was simply waiting for your move.

The little shit.

“Nope.” You didn’t even try to deny. You threw one leg over his and straddle his thighs. “I might be a little addicted.”

Wooyoung kissed your fingers in response. A slow and gentle press of his lips against your fingers and it was enough to fill you with both love and lust.

“I love you.”

❀

“So you’re the reason he’s been so distracted.”

Finding a man, sitting on your coach like he owned the place should have made a strong effect on you. A logical reaction would have been to panic, to scream even and ask who the hell he was. You? You simply halted mid-way; your jacket half removed as you stared at the man.

One look at him was enough to tell you who he was. Well maybe not who but definitely what. There was this aura around him, dark and ominous, just like Wooyoung’s. Without a doubt you were facing another demon and from the frown on his face he wasn’t a friendly one.

A normal reaction, after realizing that a dangerous demon was at your place, would have been to pray for Wooyoung to show up and save your butt.

“Do I want to know why a demon is in my living room?” You finally asked and dropped your jacket on a chair, along with your bag. To say that your heart didn’t skip a beat at the sight of red eyes, would be a lie. Maybe spending time with Wooyoung made you a little fearless, but it didn’t mean you couldn’t recognize danger when faced with.

You were playing with fire but apparently your little antics amused the demon – he smirked. “I see the appeal.”

“What do you want?”

“I wanted to see where Wooyoung was spending his time instead of doing his job. Can’t believe he got himself involved with a human.”  He eyed you from head to toe, face filled with disgust. Clearly, someone wasn’t very fond of humans.

“Then, now that you’ve met me, can you leave?” You tried to sound as nice as possible just to avoid offending him even further with your ‘humanity’.

“You would like that, wouldn’t you?”

One moment he was on the couch, the next he had you pinned against the wall, his fingers wrapped tightly around your throat. “You, humans, are so fragile.” He watched you, your every shiver, every breath, like a hawk. It amused him to see you not being so smug anymore, not being so courageous. He could feel your heart beating crazily; you were terrified of what he could do to you. After all, it would take him little to not effort to snap your neck.

“Do you think he would morn you?”

His hold on your neck tightened a little more, bringing tears to your eyes. You were going to die, there was no way you could escape him, not even if you tried. You whimpered at the pain as breathing was getting almost impossible. A little voice inside your head asked you to beg him to stop but you wouldn’t. It wouldn’t do you any good.

But just when you thought you were done for, a miracle happened: your necklace started shining brightly. The demon’s attention suddenly was not on you but on the necklace, eyes widening in shock. Just like Wooyoung’s before, he seemed to be familiar with it; he quickly let go of you and took few steps back, his eyes darting back and forth between his wounded hand and you.

“The fuck.” He growled, outraged that what seemed to be an easy target, wasn’t that easy to kill in the end. “Why do you have this?”

Too stunned to speak, you simply stared at his hand and pressed yourself a little harder against the wall in hope it would swallow you whole. You needed to get the hell out of here. You silently thanked your grandmother for the gift, if it wasn’t for her, you realized, you would be dead.

“Answer me!” He ordered, impatient, his rage growing stronger with every passing seconds.

Despite your state, despite the fear slowly eating you alive, you forced your body to move, to try to get away from him – you pushed yourself from the wall and run without looking back. Fortunately for you, your prayers had been answered: Wooyoung appeared in the middle of the room, a deep frown on his face. He opened his arms widely and caught you. The moment his familiar and comforting scent hit your nose, you felt your body giving up, falling in his arms, shaking.

“Y/N.” He whispered and tightened his hold around you. He didn’t need to observe you to know you were terrified and a quick glance at the other demon in the room made it all clear as to why. “The fuck you’re doing here, Hongjoong?”

Hongjoong scrunched his nose in disgust at the sight. No matter how close he was to Wooyoung, he couldn’t understand his obsession with you. “You finally show yourself.”

“I’m not going to repeat myself. What are you doing here?”

If Hongjoong was annoyed with Wooyoung he didn’t show it (which did impress you). Instead, he put his hands in his pockets and relaxed, completely unbothered with his friend’s anger. “Making acquaintance with your new pet.” His eyes locked with yours for a moment before looking back at Wooyoung. “You can’t be serious about her.”

For a second you thought Wooyoung would simply pounce on Hongjoong. You could feel his rage just by staying in his arms. Oddly enough, he controlled himself; Wooyoung took a deep breath, releasing a little his hold on you before looking back at the demon. Your eyes darted back and forth between them, realizing a little too late that maybe the reason Wooyoung managed to control himself was because this demon was actually a friend of his and he didn’t want to fight him.

“My intentions are none of your business, Hongjoong.” Wooyoung finally answered, calmer than expected. He looked down at you and smiled gently at you, reassuring you in a way.

Hongjoong, instead of making another snarky remark to push Wooyoung to his limits, only sighed in defeat. He ruffled his hair in frustration and groaned. “Why do you need to always make things so hard?”

Wooyoung actually chuckled at his remark. “You’d be bored.”

Yeah, you had no more doubts: they were friends.

More confident (mainly because you realized your life was no longer threatened), you pushed yourself out of Wooyoung’s arms and faced the other demon. Instead of looking at you with the disgust he showed you previously, Hongjoong smiled, a bitter one, but it was better than nothing.

“You better look after her. If I found out about her, it means others will too eventually. You know she’ll be in danger when the moment comes.” Hongjoong said before vanishing.

❀

You woke up that morning with a sick feeling in the stomach – something was wrong. You sat in your bed, rubbing your eyes to fully wake up. The moment your eyes landed on the empty side of the bed; the bad feeling only grew stronger. Wooyoung was nowhere to be seen which wasn’t that unusual and shouldn’t worry you that much but it did. Maybe it felt wrong because of the whole incident with Hongjoong and his last remark before leaving. You couldn’t help but remember your own grandmother’s words, they were so damn similar, warning Wooyoung about the danger of being together.

“No.” You told yourself, scolding the little voice in your head that was messing with you, making you anxious without good reason.

You knew from the beginning that being with Wooyoung would be challenging but you could overcome the issues, you were a strong and stubborn woman – you were ready to fight for him. And you could only hope that he was ready to fight for you too.

Hopeful, you left your bed to check the others rooms – still no sight of him.

“Wooyoung?” You called for him, knowing all too well that he wouldn’t answer you.

Despite all your talk about overcoming all obstacles, your heart clenched painfully inside your chest. Feeling dizzy, you put a hand on the wall to steady yourself. He wouldn’t leave without a word, would he?

❀

Days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months and still no sign of the demon that had shamelessly stolen your heart. You would be lying if you said his absence didn’t affect you as much as it used to, you would be lying if you said it didn’t hurt thinking about him. Because it did. Every time you found yourself alone, you thought about him, about your time together. You thought about his silly jokes, about the late-night talks, about the safety of his arms. You missed it.

But if there was one thing you were certain in life, it was that time could heal everything. You strongly believed in that. So when Wooyoung disappeared without a word, despite all your attempt at summoning him, you believed that you would get over it. Eventually.

For a while, you allowed yourself to be sad, to cry, to despair but then, enough was enough. You refused to turn into one of those people who because of their pain would become just a shadow of themselves. There wasn’t much you could do, except resume your normal life where you had left it. You worked just as hard and started spending again more times with your friends, going out and distracting yourself until the pain became more bearable. Until your thoughts weren’t plagued by him all the time.

When the time of your holidays came, instead of planning a special trip, an escape to another part of the world, you chose to come back to the only place in the world where you felt safe and at peace: your childhood’s house. Your parents were of course delighted at the idea of having you back for longer than two days. They didn’t ask about your ‘boyfriend’, they figured it wasn’t the right timing to introduce him to them. But your grandmother, it was a whole different story. The moment she saw you, you and your fake pretty, happy smile, she smelled the lie. Fortunately for you, she made no comment.

❀

The night was still young and fresh, but you couldn’t dream about anything better. You sat in your grandmother rock chair on the patio, admiring the dark sky filled with thousands of stars. A warm plaid wrapped around your body, a hot cup of chamomile in your hand – a perfect set.

Coming to this place was probably your best decision.

“A penny for your thoughts?” Your grandmother stood by the door; she too had a plaid around her shoulders.

You glanced at her, smiling. With just one look, you knew why she was outside. In fact, it surprised you that she lasted so long without cornering you. “Just relaxing. I feel at peace here.”

Your grandmother hummed in understanding. “And not in town?”

“It’s,” you paused, thinking about the right word. You loved your life in town. You loved the hectic, noisy life but ever since Wooyoung had left without a word, you found yourself wishing for calm and to have time to reconnect with yourself. “Different and not what I need right now.”

Your grandmother joined you by sitting on the wooden bench beside the chair. For a moment, she didn’t talk; maybe because she wanted you to talk freely, maybe she was weighting her next words. She observed you for a while. Despite how badly you tried to conceal your real feelings, she knew exactly what was going on in your pretty head and she understood.

“He left, didn’t he?” She finally said

You knew it was coming, but her question (that sounded more like a statement) still stung. When you turned to look at her, you half expected to see the ‘I told you so’ look, instead, she reached for your shoulder and gently patted.

No matter how much work you had done on your feelings, the simple pat on the shoulder (and maybe because it came from your grandmother) was enough to bring tears to your eyes. You blinked furiously, trying to stop yourself from breaking down before her but it was no use.

“Come here.” She gently grabbed your hand and pulled you towards her. She wrapped her frail arms around you, gently rocking you, letting you cry in her arms.

Head pressed against her chest, you felt like a child. You felt loved and safe.

“You’ll be fine.” She whispered and planted a soft kiss on top of your head.

❀

Whoever said that demons couldn’t love, clearly knew nothing about them. Of course, it was rare. Heck, Wooyoung wasn’t sure if he had ever witnessed it in his extremely long life, but he knew it could happen, just like he knew that usually nothing good would come out of those relationship. It was always the same story: they met, fell in love, went against the world, only for one, if not two, to die.

But despite knowing it, he convinced himself he could be the exception.

He knew that his feelings for you weren’t just an illusion. Some would say he was simply infatuated with you but it wouldn’t be right. If it was just an obsession, he wouldn’t feel the urge to be by your side every moment of your life. He wouldn’t feel the need to protect you from the world. But reality was, he couldn’t protect you. Hongjoong proved it to him with just one little, innocent visit. Hongjoong showed him he was still young (at least for a demon) and naïve.

That night, he watched you fall asleep in his arms, safe, protected, loved and he knew right then that your grandmother was right, that Hongjoong was also right: he couldn’t stay in your life and except you to survive. No matter how much it pained him to admit, he couldn’t always be by your side. All it would take for him was to arrive seconds too late and you would be gone forever. Wooyoung couldn’t take the risks.

So he left.

Wooyoung knew he was being a coward by purely ignoring you. He heard all of your calls. Worse, he saw how his absence affected you, how slowly your resolution crumbled. He heard your many cries, your begging – it almost broke him in return.  All he had to do was make his presence known and he would have you back in his arms – but he couldn’t. With all his might, he fought himself and resisted the urge.

But did it make him stop watching over you? No. Call him a masochist but he couldn’t stop. Just like tonight. After months of suffering, you finally chose to go out with your friends and have some fun. Of course, he followed you from afar, watching over you. While you were having a drink, laughing at your friends’ jokes, he stood outside, under the rain.

“You can’t stop yourself, huh.” Hongjoong’s voice echoed from behind him. There was no judgment in his voice but he could definitely hear some pity.

Wooyoung kept his mouth shut in fear of starting pouring his heart and reveal how he really felt about the whole situation. He glanced shortly at his friend before turning back his attention on you.

“She looks happy.” Hongjoong commented.

You did.

❀

Wooyoung thought he had finally lost his mind. Instead of watching you from afar as he had done for the past few months, he found himself at your parents’ place, lurking in the darkness of the forest, watching. Your sweet scent still lingered in the air, it was faint but he still could catch it. You were no longer at their place but he had missed you only by days.

Your grandmother however was still there and just like when they first met, she was in her rock chair, humming softly.

Despite Wooyoung’s attempt at concealing his presence, she knew exactly where he was. She pointed a finger in his direction and smiled.

“I was waiting for you.”

Now, that took him off guard.

“Took you long enough.”

Wooyoung hesitated, only for a second. He wasn’t fond of witches – they were malicious and unpredictable. On the other hand, your grandmother had proved to be a very different kind of witch.

“You knew I would come?” He got out of his hideout and walked towards her.

“Just a hunch.”

Being a strong demon meant that there were very few things in this world that could terrify him, but Wooyoung had to admit that being observed so intensely by this old woman did spook him.

“You were right.” It bruised his ego to admit it but he felt the need to say it.

He didn’t think she could surprise him anymore, but she did.

“I wish I wasn’t.”

Her words, no matter how nice they were, hurt more than he wished to admit.

Wooyoung sighed, feeling exhausted and defeated. He plopped on a step and rested his head in between his hands. With closed eyes, and against better judgment, he inhaled sharply, concentrating on the traces of your scent. Hell, he missed you.

“What are you going to do?” The old woman asked, voice filled with sympathy.

Wooyoung turned his face to look at her, pained. “Honestly? I don’t know.” If he was being rational, he knew he had to stop looking for you, looking after you, it did him no good and it definitely did no good to you. Even if you couldn’t feel his presence, he was holding you back. “I know I should stop and let her go. But damn, it’s hard.”

Just like she did with you only few days ago, your grandmother reached for him and patted his head.

“For her sake and for yours, you need to let go.”

❀

Slowly but surely, Wooyoung managed to let go of his bad habit. But not completely. At first, he kept visiting you, watching over you and making sure you were safe, with no other demon around you. Making sure that you were happy. But then, he managed to give you some space. His visits became less frequent, months, years.

He watched you succeed in your career; not like he doubted you. He watched you getting stronger and opening up to new people. He watched you falling in love once more, getting married, have a child. He wouldn’t deny that he wished he was the man standing by your side, sharing all those moments with you, but he knew there was much he couldn’t give you.

Hongjoong appeared by his side, wearing a worried look on his face which was unusual coming from him – that made Wooyougn pause. “What is it?”

“You should see her.”

“Why?” It had been ten years since the last time he had paid you a visit. Time was a strange thing. For humans, it meant death was getting closer. For him? It meant nothing. When he had last saw you, he came to realize how fragile you got, how your end was nearing. It tore his heart. He could deal with a life where you weren’t his, but dealing with a life without you was so much worse.

“Because it’s time.” Hongjoong hesitated for a moment. “I think you should say goodbye. And I think she will appreciate that too.”

❀

Wooyoung thought that leaving was the most painful thing he had ever done. Wrong. To see you so frail, so fragile was much worse.

As he came to the hospital, he spotted your legacy; children, grandchildren, all preparing themselves for what was inevitable. But could we ever get ready for death? Demons, yes, humans not so much.

“Hi, doll.” Wooyoung whispered to your sleeping figure. He outstretched his hand, wanting nothing more than touch your face, to feel your warmth once more but halted. You were so close, yet so far. “I know, I have no right to say it now but hell, I missed you. So much.”

“I’m sorry for leaving you. I won’t ask for your forgiveness, but know that I’m sorry.” Wooyoung had never cried in his life, not even when it broke his heart leaving you, but now that he was finally confessing, letting everything out, tears were slowly gathering in the corner of his eyes. “I watched over you for a while – I just couldn’t let go. But when I saw you rebuilding your life, I knew I had to let go, to give you the space you needed to completely forget about me.”

“As if I could ever forget about you, asshole.” You muttered as you slowly opened your eyes and looked at him.

Startled, Wooyoung almost jumped from the bed and ran for his life. Ironic, considering he used to be the one scaring you.

Even in your state, you managed a chuckle. “Did I scare the mighty demon?”

“Nope.” Wooyoung cleared his throat. “Ok, maybe a little.”

“What took you so long?” You complained, “Do you know how hard I’ve been trying to hold back? I expected to see you sooner – especially since I saw Hongjoong.”

“You saw Hongjoong?”

“He thought he was being discrete or maybe he thought I was too old to notice, to remember.”

Wooyoung snickered at that and took note to remind Hongjoong to never underestimate a human. Even an old lady as yourself.

“Hey, Wooyoung. Do me a favor? Next time we meet, and I know we’ll meet again. Don’t be a coward and stay with me hm?”

Those words were all he needed to let his tears fall free. He took your hand and brought it to his lips, kissing your knuckles one last time.

“I promise.”

[oldworldghost]

Telling stories to Pinochio fron Lies of P about Fairytales or whatever crap reader made when reader is bored !!

[Preferably former librarian Reader x Pino :3]

Tell me a story and I'll tell you I love you

↳ Anon I absolutely love this prompt, so I had to write a little something for it. This is definitely more focused on Pincchios' feelings for you as opposed to the actually story telling bit, and I think by the end especially it kind of stops being about the request a bit I am so sorry LMAO. Let me know if you want hcs or something else instead! :D

↳ This is currently unedited, I’ll do that tomorrow!

Pinocchio sits beside you, head resting limply on your shoulder as he finds himself falling deeper in love with you.

You’re sharing one of the many stories in your knowledge with him, something old and undoubtedly picked up from your time as a librarian. Something – Pinocchio thinks – that only you know now, expect maybe Antonia, but he’s seen you catch even her by surprise with fanciful worlds and characters. It’s an insurmountable act of love, to hold so much in your mind and with such care. No details [at least from his knowledge] forgotten, no characters left aside for fear of boring the crowd. Every bit just as important as the other, no matter how minuscule it is.

Some part of him wonders if you do the same for everyone else, collect the lore of the hotels final inhabitants with the same wonder you share for characters. What do you remember about him? Pinocchio likes to think that you hold onto everything he’s shared with you, sprinkle him across the stories of your own making. Maybe he’s something that inspiration can be found in, someone you admire more than anything. Built up in your mind like the greatest of heroes. You could care that much, he thinks, and he could even be your favourite.

Maybe you’ve even found Pinocchios’ love for you spread across his pages. He doesn’t see how you could miss it, there’s so much that he doesn’t even know what to do with it except sink in it. Day after day, night after night. He’s sinking even now, nestled into you side in one of the hotels many unused rooms.

It’s your voice that keeps Pinocchios’ attention. You’re onto the part of the story where a great battle takes place, the last defence of mankind against a dark and terrible lord. Both the lords strongest servant and a king have been slain, and yet despite the story nearing its peak Pinocchio finds himself unable to focus on your words. He catches phrases, can understand your tone and the pronunciation of speech, but it’s difficult to put the meaning together. Any other day and he’d be engrossed in it, hanging of every syllable like a starving animal, but today his mind is preoccupied.

The feeling in his chest is growing unbearable, and he wonders if his gears will simply cease to work as a result. It might not be the worst thing in the world, to die by your side. He might even be able to call it a pleasure, a privilege.

Still, Pinocchio doesn’t particularly care for the idea of his own death, especially not when there are more pressing matters on his mind, and so with a bout of almost uncharacteristic boldness he sits up. You don’t pay him any mind, not until hands – rougher than he means them to be – turn your body towards his. Lamely your sentence finishes, head tilting to the side and eyebrows knitting together in a look of confusion and mild amusement.

Pinocchio takes the opportunity to look at you, really look at you. Blue glass eyes take in every detail, every curve and dip and mark, your breathes growing shakier as he leans in. There is a mole under your left eye, he notes, a faint scar running across your mouth. He traces it with his finger and your breath hitches, an incoherent mumble of something that feels like it’s his name. Moonlight shines in above your head like a halo, and Pinocchio thinks you couldn’t look anymore gorgeous than you already do. He wonders if he looks as beautiful to you as you do to him. The sparkle in your eyes, the glint of what could be called awe suggests that he does. Pride and love fill in Pinocchios’ chest until he’s moving without thought, leaning – sinking, always sinking - into you. Lips, clumsy and adoring, press against your own in a fleeting kiss, pulling away before you’re given the chance to respond.

You see the man before you grow from confident to timid in the moonlight, as if coming to the realisation of what he had just done.

“I-” Pinocchio cuts himself off, going to speak only to be met with his own silence.

He doesn’t know why words aren’t forming, and for a moment he wonders if something malfunctioned in him during the kiss. You can see the gears turning in his head, a question forming on the tip of your tongue. This time, Pinocchio cuts you off instead of himself.

“I’m in love with you. I’m sorry to be so sudden, but I,” he takes a moment to steady himself, “I could not be quiet about it any longer.”

A breathless laugh bubbles in your throat in response, a smile curving its way on your mouth as you go to speak, “I was wondering if you did. For a puppet you’re not exactly the most subtle person I’ve met.”

It’s Pinocchios’ turn to be surprised.

“You knew?”

“I was hoping I did. Never said anything because I didn’t know if you felt that way or if it was wishful thinking on my part. Hell, didn’t even know if you could actually feel such a thing. I mean, I know my stories are good, but I didn’t know if they were that good.”

“You... feel the same.”

“Of course,” the smile on your face is crooked and it takes everything in him not to kiss you again, “you’re a very hard person not to love.”

“Say it, please.”

You laugh once more. It is the sweetest sound he’s ever heard.

“I love you, Pinocchio. More than anything,” his heart feels fit to burst, “now can I please get back to my story? We’re nearing my favourite part and I’d like to be done by morning.”

“Yes, please. I would like that.”

As Pinocchio settles back into your side something in him clinks into place. He is unsure what it is, but as your hand slides into his and your fingers intertwine Pinocchio thinks that this is what it means to feel at home. The feeling of love only deepens, tearing it’s way further still into the recesses of his being. It will leave him bare and broken before you, he is certain of it.

Listening to you speak; Pinocchio can’t think of a better way to be swallowed whole.

[cult-of-the-eye]

Mag 81 A Guest for Mr Spider

FUCK FORMER HEAD ARCHIVIST

Wait I need to check the timelines - this was 2 days after leitner's death

New spooky music???

My man is so fucking dramatic I love him so much "grand of sand behind my eye" love the way he speaks

Yeah FUCK JURGEN LEITNER

Omg the greying hair is canon??

Child in the 90s makes him at most 27 GOD DAMN. I was imagining like mid 30s...can you imagine a fucking 27 yr old using words like "ilk" when talking to you

Oh shit he's an orphan poor guy

Yeah ok a lot of his personality seems to make sense if you realise he was raised by his grandma

You know those memes that are like people raised by their grandparents are exceptionally polite but in a brisk way, talk fancy and are super posh? Yeah that's him.

Getting such neurodivergent vibes

Yeah he sounds like a main character from the start Jesus Christ he's such a kid who got traumatised and then grows up to be a horror protagonist vibes

My First Leitner lol like kids had to be introduced to them at a young age like those my first toys

He's so funny I can just imagine him as an 8 yr old getting super like affronted at this like how dare my grandma think I am of subpar intelligence he's such a little bitch from the start

"The eponymous Mr spider" even talking about his childhood trauma he's busting out the vocabulary

Fuck that story actually kinda rattled me I had my hand over my mouth in shock for most of it

I think it was the bit where the horsefly brought his son and they were both crying that got me, I could definitely imagine it scaring an 8 yr old

The way it drags out as well, with the pages of the same scene it really heightens the suspense

Is his childhood bully someone we should keep track of?? Love how he says Michael probably cause he sees him as a bully lol

It's interesting how despite him bullying him (quite badly seeing as though he beat him up) he's still like yeah but he saved my life and that means he deserves to be remembered

My bro didn't save your life on purpose, he was just trying to make it worse and happened to come to a terrible fate cause of that

I guess underneath it all he was still a kid who watched someone die, knowing they'd get eaten by a fucking spider, he still held him in some regard

The way he specified the guy was his bully even after he was being eaten though lol

He was desperate to get the book back? That's a leitner thing I guess, the book makes you want to keep it so it can finish whatever it wanted to do to you

On my relisten (which I will do once I've finished the series I'm sure of it), I'll have to look out for any reaction of leitners name

I wonder why Jon didn't react more to Carlos vittery's statement, like it must've terrified him? I saw a post a while back explaining Jon's thoughts and IT WAS GENIUS it was like of course he doesn't react, he must be terrified that someone knew about his experience and somehow did this to mess with him or it was a joke and he can't let anyone know that the Head Archivist is not Good at This ugh it's so good I'll tag it if I can find it

AHHHHH HE REGRETS DISMISSING THE OTHER STATEMENTS AHHHHHH

HE FINALLY ADMITS THAT HE NEEDS HELP WE LOVE THIS CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT YES YOU FUCKING DO BITCH.

yeah at least he's right about Elias killing leitner

GEORGIE THE EX GIRLFIEND

ITS SO WEIRD TO SEE HIM ACTUALLY NICE TO SOMEONE WOW HIS VOICE CHANGES SLIGHTLY AS WELL HES LESS ACADEMIC

THE ADMIRAL

Awwww he's so cute with georgie

GHOST PODCAST GHOST PODCAST

THE WHAT THE GHOST T SHIRT IS CANON???? AHH THATS SO CUTE

Can he not go back to his own flat?? Did he bring all his clothes to the archive and then subsequently leave them there? Does he even have a flat??

God Georgie is so nice I would kill for her

It's so funny that an apparent supernatural cynic dated a ghost podcaster

WOW SEASON 3 OFF TO AN AMAZING START I CANT WAIT TO KEEP LISTENING IM GONNA TELL MY THERAPIST ABOUT THIS TOMORROW!!!

[tumblingxelian]

Wednesday Fanfic Concept - The Traumatized Time Traveler

Summary: Enid watches as her new roommate stares her down, glassy eyes wide as she offers her hand, the words "Wednesday Friday Addams," Escaping her mouth in an almost pained whisper.

Smiling brightly she grasps it, not too firmly given Wednesday looks like she might be bowled over by a stiff breeze and she cheerily greets her.

"I'm so glad you're here Wednesday, I'm Enid asiménio oíko Sinclair."

Her gaze flickered to the adults and she could only wonder...

Why were they giving Wednesday such shocked stares?

Concept:

Wednesday failed. Everyone died, even if Crackstone was killed there was no one left to celebrate just a mass of cooling corpses beneath the Blood Moon.

Goody, uses a back up plan involving all the energy from the recently dead Outcasts, the forests she cursed and Blood Moon to send Wednesday back.

But this means she is no longer around and Wednesday... Well the experience has kind of broken her. What's more the story is told entirely from the outsider point of view of other characters.

Her confidence has basically been destroyed by having been played so deeply and failed so terribly. She's being eaten alive by guilt from the past life and by her indecision born of trauma in this new life.

She believes she will go insane, possibly soon because she has lost access to her ancestors. She is suffering ghost pains for wounds she never got specifically in her hand, stomach and head, which can be debilitating.

Let alone the unwilling mutism which emerges when she feels overwhelmed, or the stray panic attacks and shut downs when confronted by people like Tyler or Thornhill.

Wednesday knows who the enemy is and what their plan is, but she's so fractured that anytime she tries to take action she starts shutting down.

Worse still she takes all of this to be curses so even the stuff that psychologically or medication could help with is off the table at first.

From Enid's perspective her roommate is just like, this extremely delicate and not very expressive psychic who she becomes incredibly protective of from like minute 1.

Thing is trying to decode how or why Wednesday suffered such a violent shift in personality. He believes its visions but can that alone explain it?

Also Wednesday's trauma doesn't only manifest in her being more fragile.

I have this idea in mind where after her first therapy session (Which goes better) Weems tries to take her out for coffee to bond. She does not grasp how desperately Wednesday wants to avoid this until she was briefly separated from her and Wednesday either shuts down or legs it to the car when confronted by Tyler and his dad.

Cue Wednesday returning to her empty rom room and having a world class destructive meltdown. One where she destroys a ton of her own possessions in a rage before collapsing when Enid finds her, falling into a panic attack at the thought of her leaving,

Enid ends up having to coax her through it with Kinbott on the phone before basically keeping Wednesday snuggled in her lap for the next few hours. Which also involves a lot of self loathing spilling out as she vents about how "Broken" and "Not meant to be this way" she is.

Some other factors include:

Enid being set off by Thornhill early on cos the woman is insistent on barging into their room to "Greet Wednesday" despite Enid telling her she's gone to bed & generally being kind of pushy.

This ad her discussion with Thing once Thornhill has been harried out of the room and forced to give them both detentions before Wednesday fell asleep again, reminds Enid of some near forgotten history with the teacher.

Namely of she and Thornhill having once been very close but going past her boundaries with stuff like, "Maybe I can help you wolf out?" only to grow very distant when Enid said she had to contact her pack elders to discuss any medical treatments.

Basically, Enid was Thornhills first pick for "Pet monster" but while Enid lacked a good support network in family she has a strong sense of cultural loyalty to the pack & is subtly leery of humans.

The West Wolf Packs also did not approve of some human pushing in on one of theirs. Weems obscured it as mere cultural ignorance and the diverse cultural and psychological developments of Outcasts mean the grooming attempts were not quite picked up on.

Rowan probably hangs around longer as a threat or maybe avoids death, which only enchances ENid's protectiveness and presents a constant underlying danger.

Xavier's also much worse here because Wednesday isn't outright hostile to him thanks to the trauma and her guilt. Thus he feels that the only thing keeping him & Wednesday apart is Enid + Yoko/Bianca when Enid's not around.

Weems and the Addams do try to intervene and speculate on why Wednesday changed so much, most think some kind of traumatic vision response.

Morticia: We grew so worried that there was hushed talk of seeking to cancel her arrival at Nevermore and seek some other deal with the courts. But when Wednesday heard our concern it was like it lit a fire in her little black heart again she raged at being treated so delicately. I had hoped this a passing thing because of that, but it seems the wound is deeper than I realized.

Chapters:

I have more chapters in mind for this but in broad strokes:

Chapter 1: Enid is very excited if a touch nervous to meet her new roomie & find Wednesday to be a fragile and shy girl who needs space from crowds during the tour. They communicate by sign for a bit and Enid gets a version of the Piranha story and promises to set the record on Wednesday straight with her just protecting family and not killing. Wednesday is also subtly clingy and clearly very tried.

Enid skips the rest of class to help Wednesday set up their room, and discovers her shaking hand and helps sooth it thanks to her own nerve endings being unique due to the claws. Wednesday has an early night but Thornhill pushes in (Acting off outdated info on Wednesday's personality) and tries to make her feel 'special'

This only serves to panic Wednesday and she's borderline forced out of the room by Enid. She ends up giving her detention which does make Wednesday act, demanding she have one too. Thornhill plans to use said detention to try 'bonding stage 2' and agrees. Wednesday is coaxed back to sleep then Enid finds Thing and they chat and agree Thornhill feels sketchy.

Chapter 2: Wednesday's sleep is obviously quite troubled so even with an early night she doesn't seem super rested. But she joins Enid for breakfast and exchanges class info with Yoko & Divina who subtly agree to keep an eye on her in classes Enid does not share.

Enid needs to leave to speak with Weems and manages to basically char the principle into letting them off detention by being very careful with her words. This being one of the reasons Weems felt Enid would be a good room mate for Wednesday too.

While this was happening however Xavier approached Wednesday with his little spider drawing. Divina & Yoko's pre-existing relationship and Wednesday's seeming acceptance made them at first allow it. But it became clear he was making her uncomfortable and getting way to into her space and ignoring their attempts to make him leave.

Then Enid returns and jams her claws into the spider and in swiping the sketchpad off the table places her other claws at Xavier's throat moments before he could start properly yelling.

"Oh sorry!" Her voice is stretched thin like a dying man's scream, "I was trying to swat an uninvited pest." Her lips pull back unnaturally far revealing every pointed fang, "Want to give me a fleshier target?"

Suffice to say Xavier pisses off, but will return to continue being awful. Enid is worried she scared Wednesday but she instead the girl seems very relieve.

There is actually still a fencing match with Bianca and it actually goes on for awhile. Wednesday gets the first round (Thanks to knowing how Bianca will move) But Bianca picks up on the fact Wednesday was not reading her moves & goes full chaotic, and gets the second point. Then they fuel for the third for awhile before Bianca wins and they go off to wash off.

While in the showers though Bianca finds Wednesday's ghost pains playing up though they are not the reason for her loss but we see they confuse and distress her a lot and that she thinks they are a curse not trauma. Bianca is very much not hostile to Wednesday in this who is intern not hostile.

Chapter 3: Wednesday's therapy session with Kinbott goes better than canon. Her guilt over the woman's death does make her talk a little. Plus the negative reputation of Outcasts compounded with the circumstances of the attack (Pugsley) and Wednesday's delicate disposition lead Kinbott to think the reports were all exaggerating her behavior.

Weems takes her to the Weathervane and Wednesday struggles to speak to protest. Because Weems is there the pilgrim boys are not an issue. However Tyler gets a call to the Weathervane from Thornhill as ;apparently; Weems's phone is not working.

He uses this to try and approach Wednesday about a 'rumor' ad then his dad arrives to be all aggressive and posturing. Weems returns to either escort a near catatonic Wednesday out or to find she is basically huddled up in the car outside.

Wednesday returns to her room and has the ensuing meltdown with Weems calling Kinbott for advice. Enid forces her way in and terrified of Enid leaving her Wednesday both starts crying and having a panic attack. After that was soothed and it was promised Galpin would be kept far away from her (With Weems promising to look into his 'nonsense claims) Wednesday stays with Enid and gets the first good nights sleep she had in awhile.

They also have a little talk with Wednesday feeling worthless because she "Cannot do what she needs to" and Enid assuring her she doesn't need to do anything to deserve love. Which Wednesday returns regarding her transformation. Suffice to say, Enid s very adoring of her.

Also Rowan has likely made at least one murder attempt at this point.

Chapter 4: The school day goes well save for some 'accidents' and Wednesday has so far managed to avoid Thornhill who has been updated on Wednesday's disposition and is trying to re-calculate her strategy.

Wednesday also joins the Hummers and is very, very insistent Eugene never enter the forest alone. EVER.

The main focus is actually the harvest festival and cos she slept well Wednesday is closer to normal though be it still clingy with Enid and trying to be a bit more communicative with Yoko & Divina too.

Wednesday: Why does a town without farms have a harvest festival?

Enid: Oh I know this one! Basically, about 200 years ago, the land across the rver where Nevermore is built came ot life. Within a few weeks the forests had grown devouring fields and houses.

Divina: Naturally Outcasts were blamed, as though the land obeys our every whim.

Yoko: Though it could have been some ancient curse coming to life, or just the earth waking up. My Sire hints at this stuff but I won't know till I ascend.

Enid: Yhe point is, the town lost most of its farms and a collection of Outcasts with wealth bought the land, warded it and built Nevermore. Since then Jericho had to move away from farming and into other stuff, like tourist attractions and big game hunting.

Wednesday: I see... (Takes bite of hot dog) A rather apt microcosm of Americas evolution into a theme park dedicated to itself then.

All three laugh.

Tyler shows up again to try and give Wednesday a police report but gets chased off by the girls, but Wednesday 'has' a vision it was a police file about her father

They go om the Ferris wheel while Weems goes to speak with Galpin and there's some talked of calling Galpin with a false tip to see if he is obsessed with Wednesday's dad.

Small town cop is super bigggoted and has an agenda is much easier for them to buy than a monster murdering a guy they saw being alive. Rowan may make some attempts but does not succeed but there's definitely a sense Wednesday is in danger. Bianca may help.

Chapter 5: I have less clear ideas on this, but Wednesday's sessions with Kinbott continue. The general consensus is that Tyler's dad has some beef with Wednesday's. Also there is some subtle guiding towards investigating certain events that will be plot relevant later.

Also Wednesday helps the team with the Po-Cup perhaps. Not sure if she goes ahead t lay traps, or Yoko is snuck onto the island, or if Wednesday just alters the ship. Though I do love the idea of Enid fist fighting a Siren underwater and winning. Also Rowan may use this for another attempt.

After that things grow a bit more vague, hence my not writing it.

Note:

One thing I like exploring is Outcasts actually being, ya know, hated and feared and how this would inform and influence even perky characters like Enid.

Also Wednesday low key may fear Enid likes this version of her better. But does also know how far Enid went for her in the original timeline.

Though yeah she is low key dependent on Enid who doesn't quite realize it or know how to fix it and just wants to protect her.

[zeno-zero]

Ra Min's children 🌸

Just a quick heads up ─ Roku and Ta Min are a t4t couple in my very own book. Ta Min is Korean, Roku is Filipino.

Roku comes from a political clan called Del Rosario which stood for 'of the rosary' in Spanish and Portuguese.

Ta is from a noble clan called the Min, which means 'sharp-minded' or' quick response'.

Questions or headcanons about them is greatly appreciative!

Oldest Daughter (Firebender) [16]: Seo-Yeon ─ Ta was the one who gave her name where Roku is still resting peacefully. When Roku finally woke up from his slumber, Ta asked if the name is suitable to which Roku agrees warmly. Seo alone means 'felicitous omen' or 'auspicious,' however if combined with Yeon, both means 'beautiful.'

She took after Ta Min's profession, becoming a diplomat as well. But after her father's death, she quitted the job to cake care of her mother. Knowing that Ta may not express it verbally, it can be tell that she needs help to dealt with this kind of pain.

Laidback and levelheaded, is stern when the circumstances are needed.

First-Born Son (Non-bender) [11]: Andrés ─ It means 'manly' or 'brave' which is a name originated from Spanish. However, Andrés is a name that symbolizes bravery the most. Its a name that has been given to him by Roku and oh boy.. Andrés does take his name seriously.

He inherited his father's carelessness for his well-being. Up to you to decide whether is that a good thing or a bad thing.

Was rowdy and full of surprises, while he does become respectful and understanding growing up - he was like his parents younger selves, just wanting to have fun and goof off. (By goofing off, I mean almost sending his parents into an early grave.)

Second-born Daughter (Non-bender) [9]: Adhika ─ A name that means 'honorable.' It's a unique and traditional filipino name. However, Adhika made herself up a nickname called 'Rina.' Aside from Ra Min, 'Rina' is a shorter version of their ship name! It's an inside joke between her, and the family.

During the 100 year old war, the playful subriquet slowly becomes her new name as a way to not be acknowledged as the Avatar's daughter.

She's a former vigilante spy, taking after her father and mother's profession.

Youngest Son (Firebender) [7]: Hyuk ─ In korean, it is mostly associated 'bright' synonyms. Mainly because of how his eyes are twinkling when he first opened them. It awes the parents wholeheartedly. Hyuk is born deaf, needing extra attention from both Roku and Ta Min. But overall, a really sweet boy.

He is observant and is quick-witted, figuring out the dots easily. While communication is definitely an option, sometimes it's not always the case on his behalf.

At first, he degrades himself for being born with a disability. He thought he dragged everyone down. With enough reassurance and love from the family that he isn't a burden, he accepted the fact that this is the true him.

Roku and Ta Min would take turns on naming their kids, while Roku only cares about the children's general health and is loved in any shape and form - he cherish the fact that how Ta Min took her time to name these little goobers, and put so much thought onto them. They had their fun approving and disapproving other names, even have their own little banters with each other while their babies are asleep soundly. Despite the pain that Roku still felt, he'd be fully relaxed and safe in the arms of his lover. Ta Min makes sure that Roku gets a checkup or two if his health is declining, sickly worried for him and its justified.

This took such a long time!! I was researching left and right in my tabs and everything, I even doubt what am I naming these children 😭. I tried giving them a little flavor other than simply giving them names. The Ra Min's children played a huge part during the war, which is another story.

My brain is terribly FRIED.

[clangenrising]

i think the hate comes from the fact she still does try to justify/excuse Razor, despite hearing from many cats how horrible he was to them. like we know he is an abuser and a rapist. she thinks it's bizarre/odd/whatever that his rape victim (Scorch) calls the idea of him being sweet and caring 'nightmarish'. brother or not, he is emotional, physical and sexual abuser, and she still seems to find it weird that cats dont… tolerate him in the slightest. that does rubs as rape/abuse apologism bc 'he was nice to ME and he is MY FAMILY, he would NEVER do something like that..' soo many irl families have sadly ('no way my son could had possibly violated someone. this bitch is clearly lying and trying to ruin our family' type of shit you know)

like yeah having to live for months with people (cats) who killed your family member celebrated it is harsh, i do give her that ofc. on top of her kitten crash and being more or less forced to tend them or else, and she is in no good shape to properly accept and internalize the Shadow Truth. but many people irl dealt with people like her, trying to bend over and backwards to justify their family members and friends, even after coming in contact with those who were deeply hurt by them.

That is a good point, I see where you're coming from. Clearly you've been very hurt by this kind of thing in the past and I hope nothing I've done made you feel more hurt.

I was just surprised because Mystique isn't like, for example, a parent who makes excuses for a son who has been accused of sexual assault and insists that he's totally innocent despite evidence to the contrary. She's a victim too, even if she was never physically or sexually assaulted by Razor. All of her denials aren't meant to hurt the victims or protect Razor, they're to protect herself from the terrifying reality of her situation. Does that make what she did right? No, and I don't think I've ever said that, but I do think it makes it less deplorable.

As well, its not like Scorch has told her "he assaulted me." Scorch is VERY private and so that stuff isn't public knowledge. I feel like there might be some projection on to her because of information the audience has that she doesn't. As far as killing Smokyrose, that was framed to the city cats as a casualty of war, not the murder of a peace negotiator, and to her is similar to if say, Razor were a cop who shot somebody. We obviously would find that terrible but from her conservative point of view that's just his job, to protect the city from dangerous cats with lethal force if necessary. When she got to the Clans that became more complicated for her and she's hasn't ever once claimed Razor was in the right to kill her.

What she did ask for was that the fight be solved peacefully. As far as she knows, the Clans are blowing Razor's actions out of proportion and jumping to killing him when there could have been a different solution. Like, imagine if you went to a village and everyone there was like "your brother is an evil murderer" and then failed to present you with any substantial evidence. Who would you want to believe, the strangers ready to kill him or your brother who has only ever been good to you and everyone you know (or at least, you've rationalized his behavior to believe that's the truth, lied to your self enough that you believe it)?

This isn't to trivialize what you went through or excuse real life cases of people who deny heinous acts. This is simply to say, I feel like anyone who hates Mystique isn't engaging with the entirety of the story I'm telling. I understand, though, that this could be because of a defensive reaction and I don't mean to put any blame on someone who might be feeling that way. This is a complicated topic and its possible for neither party to be the bad guy in this situation.

[dropintomanga]

Graduating from My Hero Academia

So after 10 years, one of the 2010s' biggest hits is finally over. Kohei Horikoshi's My Hero Academia was a title that Shueisha and the anime/manga community needed to captivate audiences worldwide. The title coincided with the popularity of American comic book superhero movies over the last decade.

I'll say that after all I read, My Hero Academia is a great title for exploring how to nurture youth into becoming the best people they can be.

I still remember when I first got into the manga, I wasn't too initially drawn in. But I got how the interactions between Izuku "Deku" Midoriya and Bakugo Katsuki were a driving point in the story. What really drew into My Hero Academia was when Shoko Todoroki got development in one of the first major arcs. I wrote about this a decade ago when it was happening in the manga. Some youth feel that they don't have a choice in how to live unless you tell them that they do.

Another one of my favorite parts of the manga was when Deku and Bakugo fought after the Hero License arc. You got to see two young men who couldn't truly understand each other and felt weak despite being strong. Both were driven so much by All Might that their relationship almost deteriorated if they didn't address the tension between the two.

I've written quite a bunch about My Hero Academia, but I feel like I should have written about the Todoroki family drama and the Tomura Shigaraki trauma. Adverse childhood experiences are a thing and the circumstances regarding the characters involved reeked of ACEs. Children can potentially become villains when faced with abuse within their own homes. They will resort to unhealthy means/outlets to try to cope.

Ultimately, this manga is about how to lead children down a path where even if they are going through something terrible, there's some sense of hope out there. And at the same time, how do adults become the kind of people to inspire those kids? We don't want them running into All for Ones, who all think that the whole world needs to burn down in order for peace to occur.

While the final arc was a bit of a drag at times, I got the message that Horikoshi is saying. We have to pass down values, not beliefs. Values that promote compassion, humility, and connection. Anyone can become a villain due to how cruel society can be at times and anyone can be a hero when they meet the kind of people that shows them kindness.

Of course we can't save everyone, but we can definitely be heroes to the immediate people in our lives. That's all we can ask for.

In any case, thank you, Horikoshi, for creating a series that became a beacon for many youth looking for some optimism in a world that doesn't always show it. Thank you for creating a work that does a good job of showing the effects of childhood trauma and youth insecurities on its important characters.

May Plus Ultra continue to inspire the best in all of us!

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

I have weirdly posted very little on Tumblr about the current Taskmaster season, despite being absolutely obsessed with it. I’ve been enjoying it hugely, but every time I go to write a post about it, I get in my head about whether I’m enjoying it wrong. I need to stop reading the internet.

So I’m liveblogging this episode, like I used to do. Because it’s fun. Thoughts on Taskmaster s17e06, written as I watch it:

- That intro was the funniest one they’ve had in a while. The aunt relay story was like the Platonic ideal of Taskmaster intro Alex banter. Great start.

- John Robins is, as I expected and specifically called (you have to call it so you can have the bragging rights if you’re right and never bring it up again if you’re wrong), absolutely killing it, points-wise, throughout this season of Taskmaster. But his prize tasks aren’t what I was expecting, especially since good prize tasks are usually correlated strongly to a contestant who cares a lot about winning, as the others just fill in the list without much thought. John started really strong with the diaries, and since then has just brought in things that float around the internet four separate times. I would like to see the rest of his Taskmaster meme collection thought.

- And Nick brought in an ice cube, so maybe John’s still in the game. Quite funny how he sold that though, his entire face swearing that this is definitely a reasonable thing to do.

Look, I’m trying to stop drinking, and I am definitely over the mentality I had in my twenties, about how you have to drink things “properly”, where “properly” means never diluting the alcohol content because, to quote Lord Gregory Davies, “I’m not a pussy”. My days of believing that sort of thing are long over, I swear. Or I thought they were, until I saw this. Don’t put ice in wine, guys. Obviously. Don’t put ice in wine.

- Ohhh, this is that episode Joanne was talking about on the podcast, where they refer to the prizes as “presents for Greg”. Good stuff, that was funny.

- The contestants who turn up on Taskmaster having obviously never seen it before are the ones where I’m least likely to seek out their other work, because I just cannot believe I would find anything relatable in anything written by a person who could go on a show like that without doing any research beforehand. However, those contestants are often funny in the moment. And Sophie not knowing what prize tasks are by episode six is pretty funny.

- Of the first three prizes, Sophie’s is the first one I’d actually want. I’ve always thought going around in those giant inflatable balls looks like enormous fun, but I’ve never done it. Can’t see Greg enjoying it, though. What a terrible gift.

- Alex’s petulant “They’re not presents!” was also very funny. Strong first six minutes of the episode for Alex Horne.

- I would also like Joanne’s present. And unlike with Sophie’s, I don’t see why Greg wouldn’t. I don’t see why anyone wouldn’t. I shouldn’t want this because she’s one of the two people with a shot at catching up to John, but five points to Joanne. That’s got to be the best present.

- Oh, this is the episode when Steve pulls out that cryptic crossword message that people found back in the fall, when this was filmed. Yeah, okay, I hate to say it but that’s got to be five points to Steve on effort alone. They’re a good thing to get into, too. And it should be four to Joanne; I’ve got bragging rights riding on John but top marks in this one should go to the two people mostly likely to catch him. I’m extremely impressed by anyone who can do a cryptic crossword, much less set one.

- Further to my argument that competitiveness is not just entertaining for its own sake, but it is also funny when done on this comedy show: the look on John Robins’ face after Steve reveals the cryptic crossword and John realizes he’s fucked this one by comparison. You can’t tell me that’s not funny. That is a funny realization to watch come over a person’s face. Also, this is the most I’ve liked Steve in the show so far. That is some proper effort.

- Yep, I hate to say it because of my bragging rights that are on the line, but I think Greg scored that prize task exactly correctly. You’re going to need to pick it up in the studio tasks, John. And maybe stop bringing in shit you found on the internet. I’m fine and invested in the competitive side of this a normal amount.

- I frequently like the tasks in which they have to reference each other in some way (like the season 12 prize task where they brought gifts for the person sitting next to them is one of my favourite prize tasks ever), but I’m not sure how well it’ll work in a season where aside from Nick and Steve, none of them seem to know each other (at least before filming this). In addition to two people not knowing what show they’re on. Joanne’s probably got a bit of an advantage here because everyone knows some stuff about Steve Pemberton.

- No victory criteria specified on the task, so this will be a two-parter. Which means actually, the points may not even be based on how good the hamper is, so maybe that’s no advantage at all. The points will probably be based on what they do with their hampers once they get them.

- Just to be pedantic for a moment: the information is on the task, and the task itself never actually says their hamper has to match the wheel.

- Joanne bringing in that thing I mentioned, that she’ll be able to come up with something for Steve because everyone knows at least a bit about him: holding up a disembodied head, “This ‘cause I know he likes weird shit.” Yep. I haven’t actually seen any of the League of Gentlemen shows, but that’s the one thing I know about Steve Pemberton from outside Taskmaster. If I had to represent what I’m pretty sure his work is like, I think there are probably disembodied heads and other weird shit.

- Steve Pemberton quoting the wrong song back at Alex after “1, 2, 3, 4” was also pretty funny. He’s slightly growing on me this episode.

- Joanne’s first thought of what makes things exciting: tequila. Very on-brand.

- I like the idea of this task, fairly open-ended and leaves room for creativity. It’s not far off from the “create tension” task, or the many similar “make [thing] the most exciting” in previous seasons, but those often tend to be good. And this season has a few people who seem to shine in the ones where they’re allowed to do a whole sketch. Nick, so far in this season, has squandered several opportunities to show off his actual memorization/magic trick-related skills, but has squandered no opportunities to show off his theatrical side.

- Joanne going in a split second from giggling about Irish stereotypes to accusing Greg of racism: also funny.

- And one scene later, we have Nick’s theatrical side. I knew he’d go big on this. Constructed a set and organized lighting and music. Good stuff.

- Sophie might be okay here, point-wise, if she comes up with a narrative to justify the dancing when selling it. But I bet she won’t.

- Having seen her in the studio – and she didn’t. Why did Alex have a pigeon on his head? You need a narrative, Sophie. Greg likes a narrative.

- “And that, Greg, was a thumble brag.” – Alex

Thumble brag, it’s thumble brag, thumble brag of the week!

- Everyone’s very on brand in this task so far. Nick goes theatrical. Sophie does a confused abstract dance-y thing. John goes sporty.

- I wrote that before seeing Joanne in a moustache, doing an unnecessarily complicated game. That’s less on-brand but I like it.

- My reaction while watching John’s set-up: That’s funny, he took the opportunity to turn the tables on Alex, making him read out and do a task. Aw, got the Queen song titles in there, well done. I wonder if they’ll… hang on, are you allowed to just light shit on fire in the grass on the Taskmaster grounds? What the fuck? He says he had a two-hour health and safety meeting to clear driving that car with an egg, but no one stopped him from lighting a fire in the grass?

- I have no idea what the hell is going on in Joanne’s attempt but it’s definitely not a thumb war. What did Joanne think the task was?

- Whatever John and Alex were doing was also not a thumb war, though maybe slightly more because they did hit each other with pretend thumbs. Also, I don’t care whether it adhered to the remit, because that was enormous fun to watch. I would genuinely watch that like an actual sport. I would pay good money for the uncut footage of that whole game. Why don’t more people on Taskmaster hit each other with sticks?

- Okay, lots of things in this episode have been funny so far, but the first one to make me actually laugh out loud was John freaking out about naming the wrong Queen album when asked what a particular song was on. It’s the split-second transition between the confidence with which he delivered his first answer and the panic when he realized it was wrong. That transition is never not funny. The cheeky look on Alex’s face was pretty good too.

- Ugh, they saved Steve for last because he’s going to go really big, isn’t he? He’s been good in all the theatrical tasks so far. I’m not saying “ugh” because I’m not impressed, I just don’t want him to narrow John’s lead in the overall scores.

- Okay that was fucking funny. He went even bigger than I expected, how did he put all that together in that amount of time? Yeah, fuck it, well done, Steve. You made a movie. But you didn’t hit Alex Horne with a stick, did you?

- I’m enjoying Alex in the studio being briefly unable to read the autocue because he’s giggling too hard at Steve’s theatrical production.

- I think I’d have put Joanne on the same level as Nick and John – I’d personally probably have put John one point higher, and that’s not because I have bragging rights staked on him winning the series, it’s because I like watching sport-type-things and people hitting each other with sticks – but if I take out my subjective bias, I think the three of them were probably about the same. Other than that I agree with the scoring though.

- I enjoyed the high five between Nick and Sophie over both being at the bottom of the scoring. It’s always fun when the two lowest-scoring contestants bond over that. John’s only one point up though, rough episode for him. But he’s got a cushion of a few points on his lead overall, it’s all right. Steve was always going to win that theatrical one. Also, Alex just said the word “darts” when introducing the next task, which makes me think John’s about to claw some points back. That’s his thing.

- Oh yes, those are darts in the initial shots. Let’s go, Johnny JR. Here’s where you make up the points.

- Oh it’s a team task. Okay this might go less well. Means he can’t pull ahead of Joanne here. But he can at least catch up to Steve. I bet Steve Pemberton can’t throw darts.

- John doesn’t even get into the dome before informing the team that he was on the college darts team. I’m impressed that he managed to hold back from mentioning that he was the captain. I’m actually looking forward to this, aside from its value as a Taskmaster task. I’ve spent a lot of time listening to John Robins brag about his darts skills, and it sounds like he can back that up, as other comedians who’ve seen him play say he’s good, and presumably Oxford doesn’t make you captain of their teams if you can’t do it. I’m pleased that I’ll (presumably) get to see if he can do it. Or see him fail at what’s supposed to be “his thing”, which will also be funny.

- You know, there is a bit of a pattern of Alex putting things in this season that seem like little things related to John Robins, mainly just little Easter Egg things for Alex's friend. Pickled onions in that glove task, when John is always going on about how much he likes picked onions. The task on the first episode where they had to rank each other by who’s won the Perrier Award (that of course applies to Steve too, but I assume Steve has enough other accomplishments in his career so he doesn’t define himself by it so much). Reading in Welsh. Darts. I would have counted rum being in the gloves task as one of those little nods to John Robins things, though doing that on purpose would be pretty fucked up right after he quit drinking, so I’m assuming it was just a really weird oversight. A really weird oversight. I would like them to include less fake alcohol for the alcoholic, and more tasks based around activities he’s really good at (I’m sorry, I can’t refer to darts as a sport, but it’s a very impressive skill). Mainly because I have bragging rights riding on him doing well. And because I want to see how good he actually is at darts.

- And Alex gets in a mention of John being captain of the darts team, after John refrained from saying so himself. Alex does do this while calling John out for stripping off on camera, though, so it doesn’t come off as that much of a compliment.

- Well we won’t find out if Steve’s any good at throwing darts, but Nick Mohammed doesn’t seem to be. And Steve Pemberton is definitely not much of a gymnast. I wonder if that would have gone better if they’d traded places? Nick’s probably more flexible, but being short seems like a disadvantage, not being able to reach as far. I’d have also expected Nick to be better at the bottle thing, given that he does party tricks for a living.

- I wrote the above point before hearing them have that exact discussion in the studio. I think Nick’s wrong, they had it the right away around. I also think all of Sophie and Nick’s interactions are quite funny. But all be honest, at this point I’m mainly focused on getting to the next part so I can see John Robins throw darts.

- Sophie declaring that she’s actually pretty good at bottle flipping and then immediately tossing it on the ground was perfectly timed. Or well edited.

- I've been avoiding filling the post up with screenshots the way I have in previous Taskmaster liveblogs (mainly because it takes too long), but John and Joanne's facial expressions immediately after Sophie throws the bottle on the ground are pretty funny:

Those are two people who have confirmed they are definitely going to need to rely on darts skills and flexibility.

- I was doing well with avoiding screenshots until I got to the part of the episode where they keep having reactions to Sophie’s incompetence. I'm quite enjoying John watching with dismay as Sophie drops it on the ground again, then as soon as her back is turned, he glances at Alex like, "What am I expected to do with this?"

It was a great idea to set up this task so Sophie Willan can perform some straight-up slapstick comedy in the background the whole time. It's like the time they put Guz Khan on a chair and made him eat chocolates in an amusing way while the other two got on with the task.

- God damn, John. Yep, the man can play darts. It turns out he can, in fact, play darts. That’s pretty cool to watch. It’s not a sport but it’s cool to watch.

- Have to give some credit here to Joanne’s contortionist abilities too. That’s pretty good. They definitely got it the right way around.

- Holy shit, that’s really impressive. I’m enjoying the montage of John smugly repeating “bullseye” but I wish we had more shots of him actually throwing. What we did see was cool.

- Second proper, significant laugh out loud of the episode comes from Alex telling them they have to do it again in different roles, and then admitting he’s joking. Good joke, Alex.

- Holy shit, was Joanne really clambering around in there for an hour? I can believe that, if they had 43 moves. An hour of that would be just over a minute per move. That is impressive on her part, for the stamina as much as the flexibility. That’s fucking cool. I would like the uncut footage of that task as well, please, Taskmaster.

- Oh I like that interior task location. How have they not used that until the second half of the season?

- Ah, that’s where they were going with the hamper. We haven’t had a good “create a portrait” task yet this season, and this a fun deviation from making ones of Greg. I guess there are only so many portraits of Greg the contestants can be forced to make.

So actually, if they were being strategic in the hamper task, they should have put basically nothing in there, to stop their opponents from being able to make anything good. But they couldn’t have known that and it could have backfired if they’d tried. Also I guess they’re technically on a comedy show.

- Joanne’s running monologue throughout this task is horrifying.

- Oh shit, Steve’s isn’t bad. Solid use of banana. Actually looks like a person. Unnecessary detail, as there has been in most of Steve’s tasks throughout this season. I’m a big fan of unnecessary detail. I’d probably quite like Steve if I’d never heard him on the podcast admitting to breaking that egg on purpose. But he did so I still want him to get beat. I doubt he will on this task, though.

- Written after seeing the next picture: definitely not by Joanne, he won’t.

- This has nothing to do with the episode or anything but I like Joanne’s t-shirt. The one she’s wearing. Not anything about the picture she made. The picture she made is almost as horrifying as her monologue while making it.

- Oh, John’s is surprisingly not bad either! It looks like an actual person. An orange person, which is not the colour Nick Mohammed is, but still. To be fair John did have flour, which is an advantage over the others, you can make a proper picture with that.

- And Nick’s is terrible, but his attempt to sell it in the studio is pretty funny.

- Oh and Sophie’s is properly good! Though she also had easier materials. That’s got to be the five-pointer.

- What? Nick over John? I don’t think so. Come on, Greg. That’s the first score I’ve really strongly disagreed with all episode.

- Sophie and Steve celebrating the five points together is funny, though.

- Okay, John’s not fallen that far behind. Only three points behind the top score, going into the live task. That’s less than his overall lead. If this is going to be his weak episode it’s not that bad, depending how the final task goes.

- Oh, I like a team studio task.

- Well they’ve definitely got it the right way around this time, having Nick get covered in rings. The other team might have had it wrong, as Sophie’s slightly shorter than Joanne, but more importantly, Joanne would probably be better at throwing than Sophie. This is one that’s a big advantage to the team of three since there are two throwers, but that’s only an advantage if Sophie can throw.

- That got exciting at the end. I stopped pausing it to write stuff down once they actually started the studio task, because I did end up getting into it like a sport. Maybe too much like a sport, the words “Come on John” came out of my mouth a couple of times before I remembered it’s not really a sport. It’s fine, guys. It’s fine. It’s not really a sport. Credit to Steve, though, the man can throw. And Nick can move. Some good catching from Joanne, too.

While watching this, I’ve thought of another way that competitiveness is definitely funny. It’s just a parody, isn’t it? Parody is funny. You take something that really exists outside comedy, remove its contents but keep its structure, and fill the structure up with silly contents. In this case, a task like this is a parody of sport. The tension, the competitiveness, the physical effort, the strategy, the skills on display, the commentary, the drama – the structure of a sport is all there. But you fill it up with something silly. Parodies are funny, and they get funnier the more seriously they’re taken.

- Oh shit! It’s a Wilkinson situation! I mean, without the drama of the Wilkinson situation, because Steve Pemberton is doing fine overall and doesn’t really need this. But still, I do like it when Greg actually sticks to the rules and disqualifies people when they deserve it. Fine margins, Steve! Fine margins!

John winning team tasks is a double-edged sword, obviously, because it bolsters Joanne's points too, and at the moment she's in second place. But it's not like it would be better if they lost, and I think it's still more important to extend his lead over Steve than over Joanne. Even though she's ahead of them, I feel like Steve is more likely to catch up to John than Joanne is. Partly because of something Nick said on the podcast a while ago, mentioning that the competition in their season was usually between John and Steve. If Joanne ends up winning the whole thing, you'd think he'd have included her in that.

- Oh, and just after I wrote the above point, I played the video again and they showed the overall season scores so I didn’t have to be keeping track in my head. John’s still got his lead comfortably. Getting to the point where Steve almost can’t catch him in the time they have left, though I don’t want to say that yet. Having a task like this that goes 5-0 for John over Steve was big for that.

Joanne could definitely catch him, which makes me glad they’re on a team, so she can’t get ahead of him via team tasks. It’s a good position after six episodes.

- And Joanne gets on the board with episode wins. That’s good, she definitely should be there. And I definitely remember that this is just a parody and not an actual sport. It's fine. Good episode. I am a normal amount of invested in it.

[moonlitringss]

Lil BATB BKDK Snippet <3

Beauty and the Beast Bakudeku but it’s the library scene and Katsuki is listening to Izuku ramble about the books. I wrote what was basically a draft on discord and decided to expand it into its own lil thing. This is also one of my favorite scenes in the movie (I prefer the animated original but love both!)

✧･ﾟ-✧･ﾟ-･ﾟ✧･ﾟ✧-✧･ﾟ-✧･ﾟ-･ﾟ✧･ﾟ✧･ﾟ-✧･ﾟ-･ﾟ✧･ﾟ✧-✧･ﾟ-✧･ﾟ-･ﾟ✧ A huge stack of books the human particularly enjoyed sat elsewhere on the table. Set aside for later as Izuku got right back to the shelves, Katsuki following behind. Each book was different, the green-haired man explained. In one held the story of a lonesome prince overtaken by a terrible curse. In another was an inexperienced adventurer on a quest for a rare flower, finding more than expected in the process. Sometimes Izuku read a story because he felt he related to the protagonist, sometimes because he envied their life. The freedom, the friendship, the excitement. Little things like that. Things the human brushed off with a laugh so as to not sour the mood.

And while the beast found him extremely annoying, he couldn’t help being captivated by the human and his incessant rambling. 

There were no doubt thousands of books in the prince’s library. Sure he’d skimmed through a handful and read through even less, but by no means was he a bookworm. If he wasn’t going to take interest in the library’s catalog, someone had to. Right?

Besides, Katuski never had the patience to read on his own. The thousands of stories in his library could’ve been tackled in the many years he’d been turned, but alas. Having large claws and an explosive temper meant many of these books would be destroyed the second anything pissed him off anywho.

How interesting was it the human’s love of books seemed to triumph over any fear of Katsuki as well. 

Still was the human chatting about these books. One moment he gushed over the library’s size, comparing it to his go-to. The next he’d sift through book titles to gauge familiarity, or take out ones he knows he’ll want to read later. (Hence the pile on the table). Every time the stack proved too heavy (despite Izuku insisting he could carry it), the blond beast snatched them to carry himself. ‘So you don’t fall and break anything’ was his excuse. The human simply chuckled in amusement, as the prince’s tail’s slow wags contrasted his harsh nature.

Izuku only quieted when Katsuki deemed he’d chosen enough books (for a lifetime). That, and Izuku was more than impatient to dive into a new book. Seated at the table, a book in hand, Izuku beamed. He was ready to begin when the chair beside him scooted back in a silencing screech, seating the beastly prince. 

At first, Izuku didn’t mind. Smiling so bright as he quickly delved into the story of his book. The silence was comfortable, at least on his end. The beast’s hoarse breathing proved to be nothing but white noise.

Izuku could read among the loud and the quiet alike, although he preferred the latter. There, he wouldn’t have to worry about the peering judgy eyes of his town. Immersion in his story constantly broken by snide whispers. It got to him more than he’d like to admit. Maybe that’s another reason why he envied the lives of these characters. Why his nose was constantly buried in pages.

“Something wrong with the book? Don’t tell me the story’s shit after 2 pages.” Katsuki rumbled. Izuku jolted. “What do you-” “You stopped smiling.” The beast stated.

“Oh! I didn’t realize, sorry.” The human smiled, but it was feigned. He may have been a stranger to Katsuki, but even he knew the grin shown now couldn’t compare to the one just minutes prior. Katsuki wanted that one back.

Katsuki huffed. Hard enough to blow forward some of the book’s pages and Izuku’s curly bangs. He wouldn’t say Izuku had nothing to apologize for, because he should apologize for losing that damn smile. The prince wondered how he could get it back.

“Just get back to reading. And out loud. You being all quiet is annoying.” 

Izuku laughed. He couldn’t help but find the beast’s oddly directed anger charming. The few pages read flipped back to the first. Izuku didn’t mind restarting. Only a little of what he read was retained anyway.

As soon as he began to read, the beast’s demeanor shifted and softened. Intense red eyes softly watched the human read. The beast was paying attention to the story, yes, but not nearly as much as he was watching the man reading to him.

Occasionally did the prince’s mind wander away from the story and onto his reader. The way Izuku read wasn’t monotone by any means. His tone rose at the mention of action, and calmed at the solemn moments. Any dialogue he read felt genuine. The characters were easily distinguishable by the voices Izuku gave them. (Katsuki thought it was cheesy). If not by his voice, then Izuku’s expressions gave way to the mood of the book.

His eyes twinkled from the sparks of hope. Tears blurred twinkles when hope seems lost. Sometimes his smile would go too. As he read, Katsuki wondered if Izuku was the same way when he read to himself. Or was he playing it up to keep the beast interested.  

Izuku’s gesture was one Katsuki couldn’t fathom. The staff of the castle treated him well, they cared. They had also been there not only when the curse was cast, but for the prince’s whole life. They knew him from his earliest days and watched him grow into the man, and beast, he’s become. To Katsuki, his staff weren’t merely staff, but family. Although he’d never admit it. 

Yet this complete stranger, one he’d only yelled at and threatened, sat beside him, at ease. Katsuki made him a prisoner. He fully intended to keep the human in that barred cell with just enough food to keep him alive. Fueled by his own misery and anger. Nearly every interaction the two had was filled with such negativity. He’s scared Izuku away. Literally sent him running. Even after saving him from wolves did Katsuki roar at the one who was only trying to help. So with all of that, how could he sit here and read to Katsuki with no ounce of fear or frustration present? Why? 

Katsuki had no idea. And for that moment, he didn’t really care. 

All the beast wanted to do, all the beast did, was lay with his head in his arms, and watch the green-haired man read with the fondest eyes he’d given anything in 10 years.

✧･ﾟ-✧･ﾟ-･ﾟ✧･ﾟ✧-✧･ﾟ-✧･ﾟ-･ﾟ✧･ﾟ✧･ﾟ-✧･ﾟ-･ﾟ✧･ﾟ✧-✧･ﾟ-✧･ﾟ-･ﾟ✧

[thundercrackfic]

Processing GO S2

It’s been two nights of poor sleep after watching Good Omens season 2. I have so many FEELINGS. I’m overwhelmed and emotionally exhausted. It’s wild and even a little embarrassing to have so strong a reaction, but here we are. 

I wrote about my feelings below, and through the writing, I convinced myself that for my own mental health, I shouldn’t rewatch right away. I’m not leaving the fandom or anything -- despite these feelings, which I hope are temporary, I still love Good Omens and its wonderful, thoughtful, remarkably queer fans! I live here now! -- but I can’t handle watching again yet.

Spoilers below.

Being a scientist, I’m finding it useful to sort my feelings into categories and try to address each category individually.

First of all, I’m just SAD. Aziraphale and Crowley are my emotional support characters and the end of Season 2 left them in a very bad place: separated, isolated, miserable, and threatened with annihilation. While I understand the structure of trilogies and I have faith that the sequel that Gaiman and Pratchett plotted will reunite them, no such sequel has been greenlit, and the SAG-AFTRA strike and studio intransigence mean we won’t find out whether and when Amazon will actually produce a third season for the foreseeable future. So Aziraphale and Crowley are sad and I’m sad. I want to rewatch but I’m worried I’ll get even sadder. Since I have depression, this is actually a health risk to me.

I’m also angry, because the viewers were not given crucial information necessary to understand Aziraphale’s final decision. Yes, I understand what it means that this is the second act of a three-act story, but I’m still saying that this act’s story was incomplete. My main complaint is that we do not actually see Aziraphale’s full conversation with the Metatron, we only see what he reports to Crowley with lots of agitated hand-wringing. I love Aziraphale, but he is NOT a reliable narrator. The cut away from the conversation to Aziraphale’s proposition to Crowley, followed by the Metatron coming in and asking “how did he take it?” makes me certain that there are shenanigans afoot. Aziraphale is, at the very least, not telling the whole truth to Crowley, is lying about some part of that conversation either by omission or outright. For which I am sure he has good reasons, and I’m sure at least some of the reasons being discussed in endless metas will eventually be revealed as true, or close to true, when the third act comes out. But for now, we can’t know. Without witnessing the full conversation, I can’t possibly understand Aziraphale’s terrible choice, and I don’t have any hope of understanding Aziraphale’s motivation until such time as Gaiman tells the rest of this unfinished story. (Yes, I know Gaiman said he’d tell the story even if no third season is produced, and that promise is some comfort; but in the meantime we are in limbo.) I’m sure there are lots of clues and hints we’ll all pick out with rewatches, but it’s as if Season 1 ended with Crowley in Hell facing the bathtub and Aziraphale in Heaven walking toward hellfire. Sure, in hindsight the clues at the body swap are evident, but we couldn’t have known what canonically happened and there would have been lots of other theories and scenarios. Imagine having had to wait four years to find out whether and how they survived their trials? My anger won’t be salved by watching again.

There are things I disliked about Season 2 that, in my opinion, seem to contradict the story/character development as presented in Season 1. The big one is what I saw as a power imbalance between Crowley and Aziraphale that I didn’t see in Season 1. Not just the Throne?Dominion?Archangel? Crowley thing. Aziraphale was always slow, stubborn, in willful denial of things he didn’t want to look at, and Crowley always coaxing and tempting Aziraphale into change, yes. But in Season 1 Aziraphale also was a vast storehouse of wisdom who solved puzzles that 400 years of Devices couldn’t, and rules-lawyered Gabriel and Beelzebub into confusion (with Crowley not leading, just cheerleading) at the airbase. In Season 2 Aziraphale just seemed dim compared to Crowley on every dimension, not an equal party to their relationship at all. Aziraphale’s adorable in both seasons, but in this season he seemed infantilized in relation to Crowley, and not in a cute/funny (Jimbriel) way. While both he and Crowley had their idiot moments, Aziraphale’s weren’t balanced with brilliant moments, I felt. Like, his moral quandary in Edinburgh seemed far too simple to be so late in his character development, and both in history and in the present Crowley came across as professorial or even paternal in relation to him, which is a huge squick for me. Maybe this impression of power imbalance isn’t correct, and will change on rewatch. I hope so.

There are things I disliked about Season 2 that originate in conflicts with my own headcanons and/or story preferences. This, at least, is something I can work on, trying to recognize the stuff in my head that I couldn’t reasonably expect Season 2 to produce (or not produce) for me. For example, I really do not like all the hints at Crowley having been, and remaining, an especially powerful entity. I liked thinking of them as having equal unimportance, totally substitutible for each other despite their different “sides,” exemplified by the Arrangement, how easily they performed each other’s jobs. Reflecting now, I can admit that even in Season 1 Crowley clearly had a different status to Aziraphale -- he was chosen to deliver the Antichrist, after all, and demonstrated powers that Aziraphale didn’t (stopping time, sensing whether or not others were watching). So I should be able to reconcile that, with time. I also personally hate it when character conflict results from disastrously poor communication. This one, I recognize, is especially unfair to the source material, because it’s true that for all their conversation, they canonically aren’t great at telling each other anything important. (The most common theme of my comments on fanfic is “TALK TO EACH OTHER YOU WALNUTS!”) Even so, I’m still struggling with some of the character decisions this season because I don’t feel like they demonstrate the growth that especially Aziraphale underwent across Season 1. Other things that bugged me were Aziraphale’s gluttony scene (I’ve imagined 1001 scenarios for Aziraphale’s first taste of gross matter, and none of them featured anything like him gorging like a hyena on blackened ox ribs), and I was disappointed not to see more fluidity in Crowley’s gender presentation. All that stuff has to do with my own expectations, so I should be able to compartmentalize those and be at peace with Season 2 canon, with time.

I would like to watch again. I think it probably hurt my understanding of the story to have binged the six episodes in three days rather than watching them one a week. I didn’t really want to watch them that fast, but I felt pressured to watch quickly so I could participate in discussion with fandom friends. I’ve heard from some friends who had initially negative reactions that they’ve warmed up to it on rewatch, with a clearer understanding of the story that was being told. I want to rewatch and experience that. But the sadness and anger I’ll feel about the end of the season and the impossibility of my understanding it won’t go away on rewatch, I’m afraid. Not until the third act’s story arc is revealed along with the obscured elements of the second act’s story. And I’m not in a good enough place emotionally to willingly invite more sadness and anger into my head.

So I guess I’ve talked myself into not rewatching for a while, which itself makes me sad. But it’s what I need to do.

I love all you queers. To the world. 🍷

[an-inky-fingered-lass]

A Love Letter to the Thursday Murder Club.

I just finished The Last Devil to Die. Book 4, and the last for a while. Mild spoilers for the whole series ahead.

This is not likely to be coherent, because I just finished the book about half an hour ago and I am a Wibbly Mass of Feelings. It is also, despite the spoiler warning, unlikely to have much to do with the actual plot, because my reading comprehension skills are rather terrible for anything that is not character arc and theme and worse when I am as invested as I am. Which is helplessly, hopelessly, far more invested than I have been in anything for a while.

I will be rereading for the actual plot, because I have an inkling it was genius. I was very confused, if I'm being honest, by the time we got to some of the big reveals, because I lost track of one or two of the major players at some point... I will also be destroyed all over again, but this book will be worn and tattered and so well-loved and I am so grateful it has found its way into my life.

This is a story of such kindness.

I mean, they all are. That's one of the things that struck me from the very beginning. But this book especially. I didn't cry, but it was pretty damn close, and that doesn't happen often.

This series has been everything I have been longing for for so long. And it was everything. A story about people from different backgrounds, who have lived very, very different lives, coming together with all the skills and perspectives they can each uniquely contribute to solve crimes -- that is actually a story concept that has been sitting on my to-write list for a really long time. I'm crossing it off now. I've found everything I hoped for and more.

It never would have occurred to me to make the crew a gang of pensioners, the ends of their lives a visible end of the tunnel, but that's what makes the whole thing work. It gives them such a unique approach to everything -- the kind of compassion and rationalism, wisdoms and sorrows and kindnesses that can only truly be represented by people who have seen so very much.

Every single person in this story is given the chance to be a person. Drug dealers and murderers, mothers and daughters, spies and nurses, builders and psychiatrists and people who were someone else, once. People with their whole futures ahead of them, people with too much past weighing them down. The broken, the hopeful, and the rebuilt. Some that are more than one. Each with their own lives and stories. Their crimes are not excused, nor even forgiven -- consequences come for everyone; the best and the worst of us alike. Is there such thing? Right and wrong, kindnesses and cruelties, choices and consequences. Mary Oliver is my favorite poet, and I think of Dogfish often --

And nobody, of course, is kind, or mean, for a simple reason. And nobody gets out of it, having to swim through the fires to stay in this world.

(Yes, I'm quoting Mary Oliver in this disaster of a ramble. I'm in that deep.)

I don't know where I'm going with this. But I am not sure I have ever seen a story treat its inhabitants with such kindness. There is room for laughter and grief, love and sorrow alike, nestled comfortably in side by side, in a way that diminishes neither one or the other. More than most things, to me, at least, this story is about the way we each choose to live our lives. They are all we have.

"Grief doesn't need an answer, any more than love does," says Elizabeth. "It isn't a question." "Did you get milk?" says Stephen. "People will want tea." "Let me worry about milk," says Elizabeth.

It's probably not as significant without context. But when I tell you this passage destroyed me...

I fell utterly in love with Elizabeth from the very first book, to the surprise of absolutely no one. I don't love Joyce, Ron, Ibrahim, Stephen, Bogdan, Donna, Alan, and everyone else any less, honestly. I love them all with my entire heart. I am probably the most compromised over Elizabeth, because again, I'm me. Put a retired, terrifying, loyal, somewhat morally grey old spy with an abundance of sarcasm and humanity and a bushel load of bravery and heartache both in front of me and I'm doomed, apparently.

Joyce and Elizabeth have officially become my duo of all time, which is saying something, because I have a special love for duos. I also have a special place in my heart for Joyce and her courage and kindnesses now, and probably always will. IBRAHIM AND BOGDAN especially also have my heart. Oh, what am I saying, I'll keep going like this until I've listed the whole cast. I love them ALL. Have I mentioned Chris? And Viktor? I DIDN'T MENTION CHRIS.

OH AND PATRICE.

Ugh. Ugh, I love them.

Also, it might be hard to tell from this essay, but I do have to mention that every single one of the books in this series is hilarious. I read the entirety of The Last Devil to Die with a goofy little grin fixed on my face, except for the parts where I was internally bawling. This book broke my heart and glued it tenderly back together. I finished it with my heart full to bursting, aching and happy and grateful.

I will have to come back again sometime, and write something more coherent. But I am so very grateful to have found this series. I am used to falling in love with things, with stories, and occasionally sighing over the things I might have personally done differently (I'm a writer, I can't help myself). But to find a story that is everything I've wished for, that I wouldn't change for the world, is a certain kind of gift.

I think I lost my point somewhere. My grandmother's cat is keeping me company, I'm about to go get a drink of water (I'm been forgetting to hydrate, absolutely terrible), and I really need to go to bed -- but, well. I have got to quote something. I was going to use the last line of The Bullet That Missed, which has been stuck in my head ever since I finished it, and but it's a little lonely without the rest of the book. This one, then.

"[The museum in Baghdad] has pieces from six thousand years ago, can you imagine? And on these pieces you can see fingerprints, you can see scratches where someone's child has come in and distracted them. You understand that these people are still alive? Everyone who dies is alive. We call people 'dead' because we need a word for it, but 'dead' just means time has stopped moving forward for that person? You understand? No one dies, not really." - The Last Devil to Die, Richard Osman

This was long. To the Thursday Murder Club, and to Richard Osman, thank you. It's been an honor.

Until next time.

[yakultii]

I was thinking about how things change and I find it kind of interesting but I remember around 2015 was when mainstream social media eg instagram started to become somewhat political (for the average user) and became a source of education additional to selfies.. I remember around that time being referred to as “woke” (to be fair my wokeness has likely majorly regressed over the past 6-8yrs as a result of hibernation) but when someone called you “woke” it was a positive term like I genuinely remember hearing people talk about how they wanted to be as “educated” and “woke” as me or admired me and wanted to be friends with me for this reason (as a 15yro LMAO) and it was only the “alternative” kids who dared present themselves as educated and woke online bc it wasn’t common knowledge to be politically and socially knowledgeable (at least where I grew up) and doing so was kind of like making a name for yourself.. whereas now I feel like it’s just expected of young people to be socially and politically educated to some extent.. and I mean it’s not hard, because public discourse on so many topics are EVERYWHERE... While I think education is great and we should all be more informed I can't help but wonder/almost assume that this change/progression of political social media (within the mainstream ofc bc I'm aware it always existed w good intent prior) has maybe spread cause of performative factors/people wanted to make that name for themselves..to the point it all kinda became a trend.. although people realised it was so real at the same time..so then its intentions became mixed and now it is just expected idek if this makes sense... but also what is even more strange is that the connotations of the term "woke" COMPLETELY changed from something admirable like "wow that person is really woke they seem cool"(something I commonly heard in 2015) to now something that's make a mockery of eg "lmao they acting woke" along w the whole go woke go broke saga (idk if that's just in aus or worldwide... aus seems to have a problem w performativity of any kind anyway despite the fact we are endlessly playing into our own character as Australians but that's another story).. anyway idk what the point of this was cause i started writing it on my phone but then my phone died and my charger broke so I swapped to my laptop and my adhd cant hold a single thought for a second if u literally cant tell.. but its crazy how things change.. I just feel like that was such a small time frame but then again I guess that's how my parents felt like there was no internet and all of a sudden there was and the entirety of western society revolves around it so i guess change is super duper normal and we all have the same experience of it despite thinking we are unique in our experiences..I'm not really mad about change at all.. I think its mostly a good thing.. sometimes we don't understand change but personally I just hope someone is happy about it! the way some things changed for my parents and grandparents and while they missed the old days I could see the light.. only difference being they weren't happy that I could see the light but anyways I just type words here of half thought out thoughts and hope that no one reads it bc its a terrible representation of me.. actually no, its an accurate representation of me.. just a terrible presentation.. good thing no one knows who i am bc i just be saying things and keeping the rest of the things that make the things make sense in my head cause my fingers cant type any faster they are already so speedy gurlllll go back to ur notes app actually no my notes app iw SOOOOOOOO insanely claustrophobic its hell in there .. should prolly just change the name of this side blog or something just incase.. my reblogs have these words lost in an hour tell me if u read this anyway i think its be kinda funny if u did but i think u should find something better to do idk ily anyway

[wentian]

2.1 rant (from someone who loves aventurine)

i already complained to friends about 2.1 but i still need to vent while i drink my morning coffee. i'm really not happy about not liking that patch much despite it being focused on the character i was waiting for almost a year and it confuses the hell out of me when people praise this patch's story...

i know we're talking about genshin's fandom and they're notorious for having no taste or media literacy ('genshin is so good at telling stories, i don't understand anything at all' said someone on the forum unironically) but let me remind you that the whole patch is told from the perspective of a character who just appeared in the story. not a friend, not even a long-time rival. my big problem with star rail (especially after how h3rd followed kiana closely) is that it doesn't treat its main character... like a main character? it constantly robs the trailblazer of a context and an agenda in every story past the prologue. penacony started really strong with shifting the focus back to the trailblazer and yet somehow we got back to the luofu's level of storytelling in one (!) patch. as much as i love aventurine and was excited to learn his tragic backstory, this patch was ridiculous if you remember that the trailblazer and not him is the main character.

you know how in genshin you can't have npcs living their own life with the traveler and paimon following everyone everywhere and there's no escaping them? they must know and see everything, even if it doesn't concern them? i can't believe i'm saying it but it would nice to have a bit of this annoying trope in star rail because the trailblazer has no freaking idea what was aventurine's deal the whole time. from their perspective they promised to be allies and investigate the murder cases together, then the trailblazer went to grab some drinks in a bar... and then aventurine attacked them out of nowhere. that's it, that's the story from the main character's perspective. wow, such a good writing... aventurine was yapping about his tragic past for 4 hours TO HIMSELF the whole time. i'm pretty sure he knows his own story??? and don't get me wrong, i don't think that we need to follow every single character but it doesn't make any sense to have a whole big patch dedicated to a random guy who just showed up in the story if they don't plan to alleviate his status to a friend or a companion. luofu's story was terrible but at least dan heng is our friend, so it makes a little bit of sense to follow him, and not the trailblazer to get to know his story. aventurine is a no one to us.

and also i need to complain about it otherwise i'll combust. as much as i appreciate that star rail didn't need 30 hours *cough* endwalker *cough* to come to a conclusion that life is ultimately meaningless we all die so make your own meaning while you still live, it feels so terribly unearned that instead of coming to it on his own, acheron comes to aventurine and just TELLS him. and it would have been okay if the game didn't touch such heavy themes like depression and suicide (cocona's story made me cry the other day) only for the writers suddenly decide that their audience is tiny silly babies who need every single plot-point being spoon fed to them... it makes me violent honestly.

4 hours of boring cutscenes from 1 or 2 angles is already a torture. 4 hours of boring cutscenes that have nothing to do with the main plot of the expansion or the main character... 2.1 isn't a continuation of 2.0. it's a glorified personal quest, and it shouldn't had been there so soon, not until we dealt with the major conflict. if you really wanted to repeat 3.3 from genshin, then at least give us and the character whom the narration usually follows a reason to care for him. idk i want to love this story, but i can't stop thinking about how caelus was mixing drinks while aventurine had the worst day in his life.

also i don't want to talk about it much but. fucking. firefly. killed. my. hype. i'm sorry but listening to sam's voice with her uwu moe intonations was... a bad experience. maybe i'm a cold-hearted hater, but her whining on that roof was a huge red flag to me the last patch. suuuuuure you're soooo not going to die to milk emotions out of me only for them to bring you back because weebs are going to whale for you two patches later. uh huh.

and also also i'm so mad we can't have a cool robot guy, no it's gotta be a little girl. forget that this whole 'plot-twist' ruined the drama of the previous patch, i can't stop thinking how STUPID the stellaron hunters are now. immortal blade who seeks the release from his misery, enigmatic and charming kafka who plays the hearts like she players her violin... and two schoolgirls, one of which is a cool hacker and the other is completely useless but have big armor suit. like REALLY why is she there? next thing we know elio will turn out to be a twelve year old girl too. i'm so tired of mhy coming up with really solid ideas only to throw any hint of diversity into a trash bin. instead of having siobhans and svarogs we keep getting fireflies and ruan meis and it kills me.

[hermesserpent-stuff]

https://youtu.be/SSCJphSvNoI

Devil doesn't bargin

Building on the tombstone idea. Weird formatting cause I'm on mobile lol.

Tw: injury blood

Tombstone sits at his desk, quietly working. Rain taps on his window, calming. His favorite sort of weather as it warps the light coming into his office, creating artistic shadows across the floor. He often received commentary from ill-meaning social elites that his office is rather plain. He preferred it this way. Peaceful organization that becomes an evolving beauty with the changing weather. It also happened to look quite nice in the dawn and cast in the lights of the setting sun. But rain highlights its best features, with elongated shadows and a gentle drumbeat that serves to drown out much of the city below.

His mind is narrowed in on one of the legitimate branches of his company, the side that dabbled in chemicals, and the side that he kept the closest eye on due to his own history. That is interrupted by a terrible crash as his reinforced window cracks and shatters. His eyes widen slightly at the sight of Shocker rolling across the floor, dragging glass and blood along with him. The Enforcer seems to be wrapped protectively around something, a something that dislodges from the cowboy's arms slightly and whacks the wall with a loud crack, leaving a dent. Is that?

After a beat of shock, Tombstone rises and steps closer to the second figure. It is. It is Spider-man, who is badly beaten with most of his mask damaged and torn away. Tombstone recognizes the face beneath the bare threads that remain. Peter Parker.

The child that had begged him for protection from Norman Osborn. Peter looks awful, bruises dark and blossoming across almost every inch of skin. Blood smeared everywhere. Montana had to have known. It would explain quite a bit about his behavior around Peter, like how he could love the kid so much and so clearly and not work to stop Peter from getting hurt. Though Tombstone finds that he does not wholly agree with the conclusion that Montana appears to have arrived at. Another moment passes in speculation and revelation and then Tombstone realizes that he should get the child help. He lifts up both as it would be rather difficult to detangle them here and goes up a story to his personal apartment. He locks the door behind himself and deposits the two in the bathroom.

After a little struggle, for the child's grip is very impressive, he manages to separate the two and start cleaning. Some of the cuts he finds are very deep and will need stitches. He quickly gets started on that after cleaning the kid up and is almost as quickly brought to a halt by Montana latching on to his arm and pulling. He pushes the cowboy away but this does not deter Montana from yanking on him Tombstone is forced to pin the cowboy to the wall with one hand and a look of irritation that Montana matches despite his eyes being slightly dazed.

"You can't use stitches."

"These cuts are very deep. I don't think you’re in any state-"

"Use stitches and you'll have to yank them out pretty soon. I've been helpin' the kid for a good while. More misery than the amount of help they provide."

Tombstone narrows his eyes at Montana who seems to be fighting against passing out.

"This is how it's going to go. You're going to tell me exactly what to do about Peter's injuries and what I want to know."

He presses Montanan a little more harshly into the wall, drawing a broken cough from the cowboy. It is not an idle threat and Montana seems to spot that quickly, eyes sharpening for a moment. Good.

"Fine. Window huh? That explains the glass."

The last bit is muttered and seems to have been a thought that slipped out into words rather than something meaningful. Tombstone drops Montana and the cowboy has to use the wall to support himself, swaying a little. Montana then crouches next to Peter, and after slipping off his gauntlets and mask, starts running his own check over the kid with gentle hands. He mutters a few soft words and then a few cut-off curses.

"Broken bone. I hate broken bones. Upper arm. Hold him, or he might just send me sailing through the wall."

Montana maneuvers Peter into Tombstone's arms, face calm seriousness. Tombstone is a bit surprised to find his arms filled with a child, but recalls for himself the strength that Spider-Man seemed to possess. It is hard to remember that in the face of Peter's tiny frame. Montana grabs a towel and gently eases Peter's mouth open. And then promptly swears.

"Montana?"

Tombstone's firm tone barely slows the cowboy down.

"Broken fang. Shoot. Looks like the venom's flowing free. Right. One problem at a time.”

He presses the towel up and then focuses on setting the arm. Peter opens his eyes and lets out a muffled scream. Tombstone holds firm as the cowboy keeps working. The arm is soon wrapped and then the cowboy rises, dampens a cloth, squeezes out the water, and then gently takes the towel out of Peter’s mouth.

“Mont…”

Peter whines and Montana shushes and coos.

“I’m here. Gimme a sec Peter. Open your mouth for me.”

Peter slowly does and whines as Montana holds the cloth to his teeth. Montana holds it in place and glances around.

“What kind of pain meds do you keep here? Any?”

“Advil. Upper cabinet.”

“Alright. Hold this please. Be careful to not let him bite you. Not sure if his anti-venom survived that crash.”

Montana waits for Tombstone to take over holding the cloth and then rises to look for the Advil. For all the calm the man appears to be trying to exude, Tombstone can see the faint tremor in his hands and the terror hidden in the depths of his rusty eyes. Peter makes a noise of complaint and a soft sob. It is heartbreaking in a way that Tombstone is not sure he can describe. Montana gently touches Peter’s face to get the kid's attention once he has the medicine.

“Hey, Peter, think you can manage some Advil?”

Montana’s voice is low, sweet, and careful. The child makes a tiny noise of affirmation and holds out a trembling hand. Montana puts five in the kid's hand and gently aids the child in getting the hand to his mouth. Tombstone moves the cloth away from the tooth and puts it back after Peter swallows.

“That many?”

“It’ll make enough of a dent for him to sleep. If I'm particularly lucky.”

Peter then starts struggling and pushing.

“Whoah, whoah. Easy there.”

Montana gently touches Peter and Peter shoves his way out of Tombstone’s arms onto Montana, burying his face in the crook of his neck.

“Oh, Peter.”

Montana half collapses under the light weight of the child and closes his eyes. Peter clings tight to the cowboy. And Tombstone finds himself feeling the emptiness of his arms. Peter hides his face and Montana curls around him protectively.

"Montana. Report."

Tombstone keeps his voice low but it seems to fill the room. Montana stiffens a little and Peter whines and grips his shirt tighter. The cowboy runs a soothing hand down the kids back and starts his report.

"I was fighting with the Six like normal. Ock had some new brilliant plan he done told nobody about. But that’s normal.” Montana then coughs and his entire face pinches in pain, but the man presses through. “We got where we were supposed to be, and Spidey showed up fairly soon into our street wreakin’. Course he tossed around some quibs and annoyed the heck out of Ock and Rhino. ‘S were the real trouble started. Ock set off some sort of device ment to shut down any tech Spidey uses. Course he didnt take into consideration my gear and my gauntlets exploded with the next blast and me and Peter went flying. Through a window apparently.”

The report is fairly short and concise, much like all of Montana’s reports. That was part of the reason he had hired the man. But now Tombstone is forced to reexamine everything.

“And youve been botching your missions with Spider-man on purpose?”

Montana gets a look of irritation, even as the man winces through another round of coughs.

“That’s a discredit to Peter.”

The man’s eyes are growing more unfocused. Tombstone narrows his eyes, wanting to ask more questions, but knowing that Montana passing out from bloodloss would mean also not getting his answers.

“You need to bandage yourself up.”

Montana’s hands clench around Peter for a moment and then he loosens his hold. He gently pulls at the kid’s hands. Peter whines.

“Peter, I need to handle my injuries.”

There is a faint whisper that Tombstone cannot hear. Montana winces slightly as Peter holds tighter.

“I know. Love you too kiddo.”

Montana says, pressing his cheek against Peter’s head. Peter slowly relaxes his grip and slips off to the side of Montana. The kid stays close to Montana’s side, looking at Tombstone with big eyes that are wide with fear and confusion. Tombstone feels his gut twist at the lack of trust clearly on display there. Why does he care so much about this child’s opinion? He should not. And yet he wants it. He wants Peter to look at him with trust like he had before. He wants the clear adoration that Peter has in his eyes when he looks at Montana. He wants to be the person Peter turns to in times of need.

Tombstone notes that the chipped tooth is leaking some sort of yellow liquid. Montana had mentioned venom. Tombstone offers out the cloth he had held to the boy’s face before. Peter stares at it for a moment, and then glances at Montana who is sorting out his own wounds. Peter slowly reaches out and takes the cloth and presses it to his mouth with hands that are clearly struggling to stay up. Tombstone invades the kid’s space and takes over holding the cloth. Peter looks like he might struggle for a moment and then his hands slowly slide to his sides. There is still a lot of fear in the child's eyes. But the light in them is dimming.

Both Tombstone and Peter startle when Montana thuds against the ground. Peter has a look of uncontrolled panic and immediately is pressing his head to Montana's chest. He must find a heartbeat because his entire body slacks. Brown eyes look up and into Tombstone's own, a plea resting in their depths.

"I… Help him, please. I can't… I can't lose anyone else."

Tears bubble up in the child's eyes as he begs. Tombstone nods, finding himself unable to deny the plea for help.