#desperate to parent this child who doesn't give a shit about him
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@carrionfourth CRINGE he's smoking the terrible weed his children that he's mildly afraid of made him
So I've been reading the Moomin Books lately and I think that some people think that Snufkin is way less of a mess than he is
Bro is NOT a cool, stoic guy
He's a silly man who doesn't care whether or not visitors came by to see him specifically, he only cares that they're there now
He brought a can of beans to a theater to pay for 25 children and little My's tickets, children who he was literally afraid of in case he didn't like them
At the theater, when the whole play goes to chaos, he hoists said children on stage and asks Moominmama to take care of them
He cried over the sea being gone because of a comet coming towards Moominvalley, not because he was going to die, but because he liked the ocean and the steam rusted his harmonica
He also got so attached to the children that he said that he'd smoke the terrible tobacco they made every summer
He is not stoic, he shows emotion, and he's a loser
#moomin#SOOOO TRUE I love him so much#also he throws fits (spring tune & november)#his somersault in finn family cause he was so happy that spring was back#the way he started making sandwiches for toft unprompted even tho they were having NONE of it#desperate to parent this child who doesn't give a shit about him#ALMOST FORGOT ABOUT LURKING WOLF SGDHFHFHDJD SNUFKIN CRINGE MOMENT#<<#I drew art for you my kindred spirit#Just realized I sound like Little My with how I talk about him
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So I'm going to ramble a bit cuz I've been noticing that there's a lot of split opinions on Timmy Turner that rage from people adoring him flaws and all to people thinking that he's a little shit. So I decided to throw in my thoughts cuz it's been awhile since I've analyzed a character and I've got some thoughts fam lol. Please don't take this personally cuz this is just my opinion.
I think one of the main reasons why Timmy gets such a mixed reaction from fans is because a lot of his actual story is played like a sitcom. It's not placed in a more serious way, though there are moments where it is, it's quickly glossed over. If you take away the sitcom setting and the attempts of comedy and whatnot you actually get a rather horrible reality for this 10 year old boy. And with it suddenly a lot of his actions and attitude makes a lot more sense.
Timmy when introduced is a 10 year old. He's a child but he's also old enough to know the basics of right and wrong. Much like any kid. He gets his fairy godparents, Cosmo and Wanda because he was deemed to be a child in need of help. This whole scenario is played for laughs and whatnot but like, Timmy's life is actually horrid. He's abused by his babysitter, is tormented by school bullies, is essentially harassed by his teacher and is neglected by his own parents. This is his every day life, from the moment he was old enough to understand this was what he was exposed to and forced to accept. In a way Timmy was forced to grow up a bit faster because of it but not to a point where he completely lost the magic of childhood. When you think about this in a more serious way, things start to click together more.
Timmy's behavior when he gets snappy or creates mischief is a way to get attention from his parents. It's not a good kind but it's something. Or when he acts cold and selfishly, while it could be chalked up to being a kid, I could also argue that he might have actually learned it. Cause who else in his life puts their wants and desires before others? Who else doesn't think about the consequences of their actions and how it'd effect others? Who else ignores other people's thoughts and feelings when it comes to things?
His parents.
Timmy's parents do this shit constantly. From leaving him with abusive babysitters, to not really interacting with him, to making jabs about how their dreams died when he was born to a bunch of other shitty things. They forget to feed him and always criticize him, they're always jumping at the chance to essentially get away from him. All these things are things Timmy's witnessed and has been on the receiving end of for a decade. And never once does his parents really suffer any consequences. It's a known fact that children watch their parents and absorb information from it. Timmy's behaviors can very well be behaviors he unintentionally learned from them. Which is so sad because whenever Timmy's not acting like this, it's quite clear that he's actually incredibly different.
It becomes clear that Timmy's actually incredibly kind.
There's so many moments where he shows his kindness. From lending Cosmo and Wanda to Tootie, to helping fairies in Fairy World to literally giving his fairies the baby they always wanted to saving the whole world several times with little hesitation. Timmy at his core is a kind boy, but due to his home life and its constant reminders of the people in his life not wanting him. (Hell there was a whole ass episode about the world being better if he hadn't been born, like can you imagine that, it's fucking awful-). So in a way Timmy hides that kindness and rarely shows it because of these things.
Which is why Cosmo and Wanda and eventually Peri are so fucking important.
Cosmo and Wanda from the very beginning where different from everyone else. These fairies while granting some reckless and dangerous wishes, have always had Timmy's best interests in mind. Cosmo and Wanda are the positive influences that Timmy desperately needs, the adults that he actually needs to help encourage and push him towards the right direction. Cosmo and Wanda are always in Timmy's corner, even when he's made a mistake, and are always there to catch him and remind him that he's loved and wanted. In one episode where Timmy sneaks into his godparents castle, at the end when they're putting the picture of Maryann back into the hall of infamy, Timmy's first reaction is to apologize and believe that because he'd made this one mistake that he'd end up there with the other bad kids. Only to immediately be told no, baffling Wanda and Cosmo with the very idea of it.
It's things like this that help Timmy grow and feel comfortable with making mistakes. Cuz what he thought isn't exactly a normal thing. They help Timmy in so many ways and grow to love him as their very own cuz when Timmy allows himself to be well himself he's a rather endearing kid. It's no surprise they get so attached.
There's a lot of other things that I've got in my noggin but I just wanted to say these things for the time being. Maybe I'll update on this later lol.
#oli talks#ooc#muns ramblings#mindless ramblings of a madman#fairly oddparents#the fairly oddparents#fairly oddparents a new wish#fop#fop a new wish#wanda fairywinkle cosma#wanda cosma#cosmo cosma#cosmo and wanda#timmy turner#peri fairywinkle cosma#poof fairywinkle cosma#mr and mrs turner#a bit of a messy study lol
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This is a very niche fic idea that I have no solid intention of actually writing, but... "Naruto" has more than a few self-insert fics and some of them are transmigrations into canon characters. Some of them are about OCs who do not want to be a ninja and are desperately trying to get out of it. There's usually some deliciously frustrating tragedy and horror about the brutal and inescapable military system of Konoha.
So, I thought that it would be kind of interesting to do an OC-insert into Sasuke, probably ultimately more comedic than angsty, as the OC tries to fail out of having to become a ninja, but then has to struggle against the fact that a civilian Sasuke would probably be expected to start a new Uchiha clan ASAP. (They probably have to concede to at least becoming a genin for the benefits of legal adulthood of some kind at 12 years old, even if it means being a part of the damn military.)
But even if the OC would personally love to be a parent someday, they cannot condone participating in what's essentially a breeding program for a new generation of Sharingan-wielding super-soldiers. Children who are probably going to be chewed up and spat out by Konoha someday too.
I think it would be neat to have a character treat the Sharingan like a genetic disorder that they don't want a child to suffer. I think it would have been interesting if canon Sasuke had also wrestled with the idea of letting the Sharingan die out. Fuck it, he'll adopt if he wants to be a dad someday. I also think it would be funny to have an OC-insert whose goal is to get a secret vasectomy (body autonomy!) without the leadership of Konoha finding out.
Sasuke, as soon as Sakura becomes a medical nin: "I need you to do me a huge secret favor and NOT be weird about it."
Sakura, also still currently a teenager: "You're asking me to CASTRATE YOU, AT HOME, IN SECRET, HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO NOT BE WEIRD ABOUT THIS?!"
(And there's the whole fucking issue of the "Naruto" universe having cloning, so, no, a vasectomy isn't a solid guarantee of getting out of this. But it might buy Sasuke a few years to figure out how to avoid the mad science route too if anyone tries to force marriage on him at any point.)
Even throwing aside the issue of children, even in an AU where the OC-Insert is cool with having bio children, I think it would be really funny to have a Transmigrator Sasuke announcing outright in the first Team 7 meeting that his dream is to retire super early and become a shinobi tradwife to a super strong ninja.
Kakashi: "...What?"
Sasuke, possibly talking out of his ass to troll his team and because he's already spitefully exhausted: "I said what I said. I'm the only Uchiha left to pass on my clan's techniques, so my dream is to be a stay-at-home ninja, supported by a super strong spouse who can protect my family."
I think this would break Naruto and Sakura's brains. ("Marry Hokage Naruto" is not the worst plan that a transmigrator could come up with, probably.) I think that this would be a super funny start to a Team 7 OT3 in which Naruto and Sakura become rivals for the position of Sasuke's shinobi sugar daddy/mommy. (Naruto doesn't consciously realize that he's competing for Sasuke's hand in marriage at first, but he gets it after a few years or so.)
Kakashi is... So Tired. Obito, are you seeing this shit??? What the fuck.
I know some OC-insert / SI-insert into Sasuke fics exist, I just think the funniest plot direction for a transmigrator in this situation would be to completely bail on both the "take revenge on Itachi" and "rebuild the Uchiha clan" dreams in the least macho ways available.
Also, what WOULD Itachi think of Sasuke abruptly deciding to give up on revenge and to become a house husband instead?
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If it is not too much trouble, may I please request a Yandere? Platonic! BSD x Arlecchino! Reader, let's say that the reader has played an important role in almost everybody's life.
For example, she took Kouyou under her wing when she failed to escape the Mafia, advised and convinced Fukuzawa to save Yosano, treated and viewed (15) Dazai as only a child and not the demon prodigy, never once used or placed Chuuya as the second choice, etc. Things like that, but the reader is still in the Fatui and does run the House of the Hearth and looks after orphans while also training them to be enlisted in the Fatui. So, they probably view reader as a parent figure and someone dear to their hearts and don’t want anything bad to happen to them.
A LIFE OF OUR OWN.
Yandere!Platonic!BSD x Arlecchino!Reader
A/N: I immediately worked on this request on seeing it omg anon you guys do not know how much I love Arlecchino ... also for here I use "Father", but that's only because in the game Lyney & Lynette call Arlecchino that. Feel free to pretend it's mother or something else!
You're the second whole of their hearts.
They'll do anything for you ...
Father.
It's not a coincidence. To take one for an example. KOUYOU, that poor little girl who did nothing wrong. She was such a sweet kid, someone nice ... and yet she was there in the Port Mafia. Taken away and unable to live her life like a child should.
In an attempt to leave the mafia with a man she liked, it was rather unfornature enough – both were caught red handed.
And that man? He was killed.
KOUYOU was desperately holding on, wanting him to open his eyes, to survive and still find a way. And yet deep down, she knew that it would be impossible.
Good things never last.
She began to see the light as something meaningless. That the moment a flower born in darkness is exposed to light, it will wilt and burn away to nothingness. She can't escape. Not anymore. But that also wishful thinking.
That was until you came along and helped her up.
It was like a moment's heartbeat, the moment she looked up. You were right there – holding your hand out.
Even if you weren't expressive as to be expected out of sympathy for what happened, she can tell that you were no ill-intentioned person. So what did she do? She took it. Your hand. And gave you a smile ... one that faintly shined of hope.
Of course, she never left the mafia. But she had you to take care of her ... and treat her like a true daughter.
She was ecstatic to have family of her own.
You even gifted her a little plushie. Of course, of the the most fine and exquisite type of material. Your rich ass is flexing without even saying it out loud. slay
And you never treated her as a second choice.
Just like CHUUYA. As the time passed, he too joined the Port Mafia by boss orders. Honestly – you probably didn't give much of a shit, but that obviously changed.
Even now, your fatherish figure still remains after years. And that may as well never change.
He takes some great pride on his abilities, and he's rather smug about it himself. Although – sometimes he does question himself, and his humanity. Due to basically being merged and being Arahabaki's vessel.
But no, fuck that. You treated him as your own child, and although had more better things to do in the Fatui – this kid was insecure as hell and needed a parental figure.
CHUUYA adores you from the bottom of his heart. You showed him what it was to be human. To be alive. You gave him good reason and even let him visit the orphanage you looked after. Since he was merged with basically a God, you found it curious as well.
Well Arahabaki doesn't have a Gnosis so he's luckily safe
And then also, boom. Your attention extended towards his partner! DAZAI himself, of his young age. And from that time on, you already knew something was up with him.
Honestly – it can't be doubted. He was destined to live in the darkness forever. Nothing in the world can compel that deep etched loneliness in his heart; and even his late friend ODASAKU had acknowledged that.
Even after their unfortunate deaths, you were right there.
He was almost weirded the fuck out at first. You're not treating him like a monster. Or a demon. Not even his position and affiliation. You straight out threw those ourt the trash and instead? You treated him like your son.
It comforted him a little. To know he finally had someone to call his own. At first – just like anyone, he thought he'd lose you.
But you proved him wrong in various ways.
No matter how hard he tried, you kept him his side. Trained with him and succeeded in his defeat (much to his surprise), and gave him a few fatherly hugs and gifts that he would need and like. And DAZAI couldn't help it either.
He wanted you to be his real father quite badly. You were always there, and his eternal loneliness?
What's that again?
No. Even with that in mind, you never stopped to pursue and keep going with the mafioso. You'd go as much as to take him and meet with the rest of the harbingers, maybe taking CHUUYA and other executives from time to time.
Of course, avoiding The Doctor because it might as well just give back DAZAI his trauma.
And when he keft the mafia? You came along with him. Words cannot express how happy and relieved he was. He didn't want to loose his only comfort, his family. And if any9ne ever tries to threaten your familial bond?
He's gonna pull out the fucking demon prodigy card and show them how demonic he can be
In any case, same is due to everyone else. Like the fact you just always seemed to be there in the right place, at the right time. Like when YOSANO was being forced into healing soldier after soldier in the war.
The poor girl. Safe to assume the Fatui didn't really care about such and didn't participate in the war.
Much unless the Tsaritsa commands them to stop it, they may as well do that. But as of now they didn't really care. But that was only an 11 year old child ...
A child. You just had to take her in, didn't you?
And if not – in any case, you went ahead and got FUKUZAWA to save her. You reasoned with him, quite the good convincer yourself. You were a woman of a hundred, if not a thousand faces that could easily fool others.
So he took her in to the agency.
Although YOSANO was never told about what had happened in the sidelines, the moment she saw you walking away from the both of them – she just had that feeling.
She wants to thank you, if it's the last thing she did.
From the time that came on, you continued to do what you did and appeared, woving yourself into the hearts of everyone. At first, it was obviously never easy. But that wasn't a reason to give up. And you're you, would you seriously give up from that?
Many of them expresses gratitude in multiple ways, sometimes a bit unhinged – which you were yourself. There's not a sane bone in your body.
At least, that's what people like to think.
You've come this far into giving others a new life, being a father figure that everyone cherishes dearly and adores. Oh, and if anyone try to tear away that dream or hurt you – even a single scratch on that body of yours ...
There will be hell to pay.
You'd think they got very protective of their father. They can all quite collectively agree that they need no other familial figure in their lives other than you. Dearest you, who saved them from their shameful lives and gave them a future.
Even one who isn't supposedly a kid like SIGMA – he came from a book. He doesn't have a family. But correction, he does.
And it's you.
Or anyone else from multiple affiliations across. The Decay of the Angels, the Hunting Dogs, supposedly those that caught your eye in these several factions.
Suppose the easily jealous ones of seeing you paying attention to kids more in the orphanage, or giving a certain triplets more of time can get them boiling with anger quite enough. Even if it was wrong, it just seemed so right.
And so? They try to steal more of your attention away. This is one of the time they truly act like children once more.
CHUUYA would most likely not want anyone even gazing at your direction. Must they make things worse? You're around kids almost 24/7 and taking care of them yes, but you should only be taking care of him!
DAZAI acts like a child throwing a tantrum. No! No! No one can be with his father other than himself! How dare those kids call you their father?! He's livid, and tries to hide his anger and jealousy, yet he was visibly so eerie and tense.
KOUYOU can bet it was saddening to see you paying attention to work at the Fatui. Come on now, can you blame her? If you took her under your wing, you better be responsible. So she tries to invite you to her own missions and do fun together, just like when she was little. She wants your care.
YOSANO can tolerate it mostly, although at some point she comes with a breaking point as well. She's normally kind and likes hang around you and feel protected and loved, but oh, when you're not looking? Let's see ... pulls out chainsaw
So if a child or two goes missing in the orphanage?
Let's just say it wasn't anyone's fault, dear father :)
#bungou stray dogs#bsd x reader#genshin#bsd#port mafia#armed detective agency#bsd yandere#platonic bsd#arlecchino#dazai osamu#bungou stray dogs dazai#ozaki kouyou#chuuya x you#bsd yosano#genshin crossover#fatui harbingers
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I cannot begin to summarize how Monster Next Door finally portrayed a flawed parent getting a good ending in a way that satisfied me. I have such beef with Thai BLs constantly giving our mains difficult parents, terrible asshole parents even, and then just justifying the way they treated their child like shit as being parental love and their kid accepts an apology (not you Bed Friend, the holy grail of giving shitty parents their due).
The tension between Diew and his mother, Kade, is obvious, and I was really afraid that the issue would be brushed off as casually as all the rest, due to my past viewing experiences. For a good portion of the show, she seemed overly concerned and harsh toward Diew and it really bothered me.
It was this visual that made things really click for me:
(also I'm sorry for the quality of photos of the show, Gaga now seems to turn the screen black when I try to take a screenshot on my laptop, so I took them with my phone)
Loss of a loved one is hard to talk about with strangers, but it's often more difficult to discuss it with other loved ones who knew them. Diew's father meant everything to him in his childhood because their personalities and dispositions made it easier to enjoy spending time together. I cannot speak as a parent, but I can only imagine the loneliness generated by the loss of a partner (losing a main emotional support you now desperately need) and then watching your child deal with grief by withdrawing from you (a child you have, up until now, not established a relationship as close as your late partner had).
God had the fortune of meeting Diew in the present, and that allowed him to get to know him without any preconceived notions of who he was to influence that development. Kade didn't have that luxury; being a parent means seeing your child through every stage of life and adapting to the changes that come with them. I can only imagine how much harder that had to be when she became a single mother and the clash of personalities made it significantly harder to connect. At some point, she clearly clung to a version of Diew that at least made her feel relevant by presenting her love as wanting to remove all possible worries.
Grieving separately being the main wedge between them runs with some of the themes of the show, I believe. We've watched God and Diew grow together and sort out their differences because ultimately they wanted the same thing - to show they are interested and care for each other - but their challenges presented mostly in how they went about it. Diew and his mother also care about each other. The strain is part of that love and how it has also been weighed down by years of misunderstanding and uncertainty.
Kade recognizing her failure to meet Diew in the middle and letting him know how she felt about it was HUGE to me. So many people will refuse to recognize the failure, and if they do recognize it they do not want to admit it for what it is, much less voice how they feel about it. Also disappointment in one's self as a mother, I believe, is incredibly relatable. It doesn't absolve all wrongs, but it's an incredibly important factor in being willing to do better.
She isn't blaming him here. She isn't using his feelings against him. She apologized without trying to erase what happened. She is simply letting him know that all she wanted was to be closer.
And then Diew seizes the moment. He's grown up and become someone less recognizable to the person she already didn't know very well. That doesn't mean they can't work things out.
Of course this is the solution. This is the green flag communication boyfriends show. But moreover, it's about realizing that life and people come with differences and changes and that doesn't mean that things have to go wrong or end badly. Often the fears that get built up in our heads - the monsters we first perceive them as - are not as scary as they seem, if they are at all. If growth is going to happen, we have to face them.
Excuse me while I sob in the corner, but this response makes Diew such an exceptional character to me. It demonstrates how he has changed from the beginning of the narrative but also remained true to himself. He has always needed someone patient and kind enough to listen to him as attentively as God does. Being heard for what he needs has done him wonders. His struggle to reveal the things that deeply hurt him and seeing how not sharing them can hurt the people he loves in return was an important lesson. Now that his mom has finally shared her pain, the pain that started years ago by no fault of either of them, he can extend that love toward her in a way he knows will reach her.
Diew and his mother are equal in how they can move forward. The relationship isn't treated like a hole in the wall to putty over, but truly something that can be built upon a newer and stronger foundation. I greatly enjoyed the finale as a whole, but this aspect of it tugged at my heart strings personally. I adore this show. Forever and ever.
#monster next door#monster next door the series#diew#goddiew#god x diew#park anantadej#kai supranee#thai bl#bl meta
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So one of my favorite tropes is Jason or Dick going "mine now" and adopting every bat kid to come after them, and turning Bruce into a father in legality only, a reluctant grandfather in reality
See the endnotes of both "Dynamic" by Cant_Smoke_Eggs and " bystander" by greeneyedfirework
And also the Crimelord Tim-Never-Robins AU is making me tear up rn so I'm just gonna kindly take the ideas of that AU and the Carrion Crows and and shove them all into a blender to—
☆・★・・・★・☆
Tim Drake's parents are as awful as they are in the Never-Robin verse but here he—to put things horrifically lightly—convinces himself out of it
Oh yes, what you're describing is abuse and it's wrong! What did you say about his parents? They do everything he agrees is abuse? No! You misunderstand, they aren't abusive they're . . .
When Jason dies and Tim blackmails his way into Robinhood, into making sure his last remaining light in this world lives and stays as via shining as he always sees him, he get's a proper excuse
Not that he could ever tell others of course
But it's just what he personally needed
How could my parents ever be abusive? Batman hardly ever remarks about them and sometimes he even trains me more painfully then whenever my parents are back home!
☆・★・・・★・☆
Thus goes his life until he comes across a girl and her ward
Or maybe baby brother is more appropriate
Introducing Cassandra Cain, League of Assassin's renegade extraordanaire
And who does she have with her? It's only Damian al Ghul, blood son of Talia and Brucie!
Yeah, some time during or after Jason's departure from the League, Cassandra by sheer chance got in the same room as Damian
A fucking child which horrified her, so she snatched that kid and dipped
Damian telling her stories about his father and big brother both from Gotham gave her a clear direction of where to head
☆・★・・・★・☆
Not that they tell Tim this, they've hardly met him
They tell Robin silly! Damian in particular is insistent that the vigilante introduce him to his father as he is the blood son
Tim—wanting to help Batman since his plate is full—says it will take some time but he knows someone who can give a place to stay, they can trust his verified associate
Thus is how the two move into the Drake Manor with Timothy Drake full-time
It's nice, he accommodates for their needs and teaches them whatever they don't know
Cassandra quickly clues in—and informs the latter—on Tim and Robin being one & the same
When Cassandra confronts Tim about this, he does his best to calmly (are you sure about that young boy?) justify himself
He recounts the rise of Batman, of the first Robin turned Nightwing, and the Second Robin until his death
Batman's grief would descend into him transforming his vigilantism into a suicide mission
And Gotham? Gotham may be a horrifically corrupt city now, but before Batman it was hell on earth
It was already slipping back into there, what with lifelong hospital bills, disabilities, and job loss being indiscriminately handed out left and right
Though, Batman's rogues weren't facing the brunt of his rage nearly as much as most desperate criminals he came across, just trying to survive
Thus, to keep Gotham from tumbling back into the days before Batman, and to keep the hero from killing himself (because saying 'get himself killed' is dishonest) he blackmailed himself into the Robin role to act as Bat's leash and caretaker
He realized he may have miscalculated when Cassandra's knuckles go bone white
☆・★・・・★・☆
Cassandra had several moments where she has second-thoughts about bringing Damian to his father, and now they're solidifying
She subsequently informs said baby brother that "holy shit, you're father is a monster" with stories what she learns about him, albeit mildly omitting the nastier details she doesn't want Damian to know at his young age
Doesn't help when they both notice the injuries Tim doesn't even get on patrol but training and he has to go to Agent A or himself for medical aid
☆・★・・・★・☆
Tim Drake always saw himself an exception to justice. His parent love him and he has a duty to Batman
Whe his parents come home he tells them about his new friends staying over for some time
After working it out with the two, they even have their identities legalized and nobody will bat an eye at their presence with Tim
The Drakes come home and one moment he's introducing his parents to his friends
The next he's closing an incinerator room's doors with a lockpick
How . . . ?
☆・★・・・★・☆
during Tim's blackout, Janet and Jack made some classist and other comments towards Damian and Cassandra, and since their legal identities are of orphans, and went as far as to threaten abuse knowing they'd get away with it
That caused something in Tim to break and finally do his parents in
Upon realizing what he's done, Tim is going to be pretty hysterical and grieving and when Cass ask's what's up he immediately breaks down
☆・★・・・★・☆
So yeah, Tim has to hide his parent's death and speedrun becoming secret CEO until he can become one publicly
Step number one? Get Cassandra and Damian adopted by the late Drakes and insert them into their wills
Cassandra and Damian stick with Tim because they care for him, he's also single handedly providing for them, plus they don't want to test their luck with Batman at all
Damian is having an identity crisis because he was taught to take pride in his blood but his father who's been hella hyped up has brutalized his new big brother repeatedly
Maybe Tim stumbles across Stephanie and Duke, and gets them adopted too
Maybe we have a Jason with less of his screws loose and he walks up to Tim and is like "where are you parents" "they're totally alive!" "Holy shit you're an orphan actively distancing yourself from the batman because he abused you *adopts him as son*" or maybe Dick Grayson fathers instead, idk
Or maybe Jason here is still willing to pull a Titans Tower idk
My brain is melting lol
Holy hell. I love this AU. Tim adopting his other family members is near and dear to me. He has the means to and has canonically made up fake family members. He can totally throw someone into his family legally (and technically illegally).
Have you seen Damian Drake? This kind of reminds me of that fic, but with Cass in it and the Drakes dead. For this AU, it would be precious if Damian starts to take pride in Tim's last name instead. That, or they could create a new one for the 3 of them (until Dick, Jason, Duke, and others join [Steph is always weird cause she dated Tim. It's similar to how Babs isn't legally considered family/siblings, but she's still part of the family]).
Damian thus has legal to claim to both Drake Industries and Wayne Enterprises (if he ever chooses to disclose his relation to Bruce). The best part of this is that Tim is building a large family by stealing them all from Bruce (cause fuck that man).
Also, Cass and Damian should interact more in fanwork. I'm so glad that you have them as such in this. Similar to Steph and Damian, I don't see that relationship as much which is sad. They have such great sibling bonds.
Two more thoughts: One, I love the characterization of Tim stepping back into his body to find he had murdered his parents and just rolling with it (besides the mandatory breakdown). He just figures it out cause it is what it is. Two, how old is Tim in this? Does he immediately become CEO or try to pretend his parents are still alive?
I'm also imagining Tim just gathering all these people, and he's not necessarily their leader/boss, but he does provide for them. He guides them and supports them. He's like a family mafia boss, but without any command or orders. The others are free to do as they please, but they tend to run decisions against each other
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@lu-thinkingstuff I accidentally deleted the original ask (and the entire fuckin fic I'd nearly finished along with it) so have a screenshot of your ask I managed to keep. Sorry.
I'm writing this as a standalone piece, but it can be read as a prequel to quite a few of my pieces if you please.
INDOCTRINATION
MASTERLIST | MINHO MASTERLIST
SUMMARY: See above. I know the request is fem!reader, but I guess this can be read as gender neutral since I don't think I used any pronous to refer to you, apart from you obviously lmao. Follows no cannon events. I am making this shit up. Can be read as a prequel to "Life before Drowning", any other of my fitting work, or as a standalone. Whatever ya want. References to the simulation sky that's in the books - if you're reading this as a movie fic, then let's pretend this is a failed WICKED experiment.
WARNINGS: Inappropriate language, annoying WICKED shenanigans, traumatised children, Ratman.
You met Minho when you were seven. Maybe eight.
The last few weeks had been a blur of chaos you can barely remember. With the Flare finally taking its victims in your hometown, families flocked to their last resort, donating their children to WICKED.
Most children weren't picked.
Of course, they weren't. Most children aren't immune. The occasional normal child was also plucked from the masses and swept away from the warmth of their families to the cold, white walls of WICKED's laboratories. But that was rare, and they were only ever valued as a control variable in whatever twisted experiments they took part in.
Not that you ever knew that.
The potential horrors didn't matter to most parents; yours included. Mothers and Fathers desperately passing their remaining blood to men in masks in hopes of saving their loved ones. There really wasn't much choice.
You were given even less choice as you were one of the lucky ones to be picked.
A white room became your home for several weeks. They made you forget your parents - those parents who willingly passed you into Ava Paige's custody in hopes you'd have at least a fleeting chance of survival on the infected planet.
They took your name, too. Your personality. The few memories you'd managed to develop so young. All of it; gone.
You were almost in a state of shock when they finally said you could leave your pristine tiled prison cell.
Following your capture through the endless high-tech halls and flawless clean corridors, you reach a large dining hall. Several long tables fill the room, along with the high-pitched chattering voices of children. The kids vary in age - some older, some younger, but that doesn't matter. They're all talking.
"Grab your food and find a seat." The booming, hollow voice of the balding man in a labcoat reaches your ears, and you can't even begin to process what he's saying.
"W-what?" Your voice is barely a whisper as you squeak out a response.
"Join the queue, and then find somewhere to sit. Your lunch break doesn't last long." He gives you no chance to ask anything else as he turns and walks back down the corridor. Leaving you with very little choice but to continue into the room.
Getting the food is the easy bit; a tray full of a passing excuse for food and a small cup of juice. Finding somewhere to sit is the problem. You mindlessly search for an empty seat, though your gaze mainly lingers on the masked individuals lining the room; armed and dangerous.
"Psst. Don't stare. They don't like it when you stare."
Your head snaps towards a voice. An Asian boy, about your age, leans over the table top, hand cupped around his mouth as he whisper-yells at you, like he's pretending to be subtle.
"...What?" You stare back at him as a grin creeps across his face as he sits back down.
"Those freaks? Duh? Don't stare at 'em. They'll snap at you." When you don't respond, the boy starts to sense your unease. "...You gonna sit down or what?" He vaguely gestures to the empty space on the bench across from him. It takes you a second to move, but he seems relieved when you do. "You got a name?"
"Uh, (Y/N)... I think."
"You think?" He scoffs as you struggle to get your leg over the slightly wobbly bench. You think it's wobbly, or maybe you're shaking too much; it's hard to tell.
"Well, yeah - that's not my real name, is it?" Your response leaves the boy unsure how to react. You're... not wrong.
"Huh. I guess. I'm Minho." He says with a grin. "And even if it ain't my real name, they made a good choice. It suits me, right?"
For the first time since you'd arrived, you find yourself smiling. Minho is charming, for a kid. He's already got an air of confidence about him, which is almost reassuring in this situation.
"Yeah," you giggle, "I guess it does suit you."
And that is how you met Minho. Reckless, cocky, funny, brilliant Minho. And by brilliant, I mean he is a brilliantly bad influence.
It's not like you got to see him very often - just over lunch and the rare breaks you both got at the same time. But when you did, it was always fun. You even developed a little group, mainly including Minho's friends - he has enough charisma for both of you.
The first time Minho snuck into your room, you were eleven.
It's the middle of the night, the faint sounds of footsteps from WICKED guards echoing through the small white room you reside in at nights. It's all background noise, now, you barely even notice it as you drift off to sleep.
Until the loud clattering of the vent hitting the floor makes you jump out of your skin, shooting up in bed.
"...shit." Minho murmurs as he peers into your room.
"Minho?" You whisper-yell at the sudden intrusion. "What the hell are you doing?"
"I couldn't sleep." He responds, matching your tone as he attempts to clamber out of the vent and onto the safety on the floor below.
"So, you decided to break into my room?" You climb out of bed, coming to assist your best friend as he slides down your wall.
"Yeah. Figured I'd give you a visit."
You cross your arms, eyebrow cocked as you glare at your friend. "Are you insane? We're gonna get in so much trouble if you get caught." You grumble at him, swallowing your initial shock (and your small smile thanks to his presence.)
"So? What are they gonna do?" Minho dusts himself off. "Make me train more? Poke me with another needle? However shall I cope?" His sarcasm results in another eye roll from you, but you can't help but chuckle as you shove him, playfully - but warning.
"They could lock you in your room for a week." A beat passes. "Again."
"Great." He grins. "Means I get some peace. Sleep away my problems."
"You're such a dick."
"You love me, really." He flashes you another signature cocky grin.
You don't even dignify that with a response. "What exactly are we doing then? Just... hanging out in my room?"
Minho hesitates, then looks back at the vent, then you again as a sly smile slowly creeps across his face. "I think I have a better idea."
And that is how you end up crawling through a vent in the middle of the night, and following your chaotic friend through the facility. Minho is a lot calmer than you are; cracking jokes, whistling and generally being a cocky little shit. You, however, are hissing at him every thirty seconds to shut the fuck up.
Somehow, you both stumble into a vacant hall. Well, Minho dragged you through another vent and whilst he gracefully jumped down, you fell in a heap on the floor.
"Christ-" you grumble as you dust yourself off, looking around the room. It's dark, unusually so - the only light creeping in from under the locked door to the room from the buzzing halogen bulbs. "Where are we?"
Despite your low tone, Minho doesn't do much to hide his voice. "Dunno. Damn - this place is huge!" The boy chuckles to himself, dragging his hand across the wall to navigate, the sound of his words, and comfort, creeping away from your reach.
"Minho-" you say into the void, further panic swelling in your gut.
"Yo, I think I found a light switch."
Before you can object that this is a bad idea, there's a hollow click, quickly follow by a binding light.
You weren't expecting it; expecting the same dull bulbs that consume the WICKED labs. But what you get is anything but.
The entire ceiling springs to life, imitating the bright blue of the sky you haven't seen since you found yourself in WICKED's custody.
"Holy shit-" Minho gawks upwards as he stares, too, finally in your line of sight.
The fake sky is scarily realistic - the glow of the sun, the faint fluffy clouds floating across the screen. You're not even sure you could call it a screen, honestly. There's not lines, or glitches or lagging from the technology. It looks so real. Like you could reach out and feel the damp clouds through your fingers, the heat of the sun on your skin.
You look at Minho, who looks at you at the same time. Both of you have no words; how could you? But your silence and exchanges looks say everything words could - what the actual fuck is this?
"...this is.." Minho starts, losing himself quickly.
"..beautiful." You finish for him.
"I was gonna say freaky." He responds, earning a chuckle from you as you wander into the middle of the room. "Hey, there's other buttons-" He says, gesturing to the control panel on the wall that he originally assumed was a light switch.
With the click of his fingers, dark clouds start to fill the fake-sky, creating a dimmer, more stormy atmosphere. But there's no rain. Just clouds.
Those seem to be the only two weather modes as Minho keeps switching between the two. Cloudy and sunny. It's definitely not quite advanced enough to imitate the real thing.
"Look- there's a time monitor." Minho mumbles as he moves a slider. The sky dims, as bright sunset colours fill the ceiling before it creeps into dusk, and then into a series of bright stars.
Minho's goofy grin says enough as he moves away from the controls, joining you in the middle of the room. You barely even notice him until he's crouching the lie on the floor.
"What are you doing?" You raise an eyebrow at him as he moves to lay on his back, looking up.
"Star-gazing, duh. What does it look like?" He says as he smiles at you, before gesturing for you to join him.
"We're gonna get caught-"
"Will you relax?" He chuckles, leaning up on his arms. "When are we ever gonna get a chance to do this for real? Might aswell enjoy it whilst we have the chance."
"It's fake." You cross your arms defiantly.
"Still pretty. Still better than our boring white rooms." He retorts. "C'mon."
You sighs, but relent as you move to lay next to him.
He's right. It really is pretty. The mimic stars sparkle and flutter, and suddenly the labs and the experiments feel worlds away, even if your escape is an extention of your captives skills.
Minho suddenly starts chuckling.
"What? What's so funny?" You say, turning your head to look at him.
"Nothing." He shrugs. "Just thinkin' that if Thomas was here, he'd probably be telling us about all those star thingies."
"...star thingies?"
"Yeah. You know? Those... stars that are, like, in a pattern."
"...constellations?" You can't help the amused smile creeping across your face at your friends ignorance.
"Yeah- those. They got names don't they?" Minho turns to look at you. "Thomas is such a dork. He'd know all of them."
You shake your head as you look back up at the ceiling, but Minho keeps looking at you.
"We should tell the others." You say, not noticing his gaze.
"What?"
"About this room. Newt and Sonya would love this."
"I thought you didn't want to get caught?" He chuckles and you roll your eyes.
"Yeah- but this is cool. They should see it."
A beat passes as Minho continues to look at you. "Nah."
"Nah?" You look at him, surprised by this. He's rebellious and fiery and is normally the first to drag everyone into schemes and fun despite the risks.
"Nah... this is... ours." He says, smiling softly at you, before he shifts slightly to slips his fingers between yours, looking back up. "Just ours."
And that's what it became.
At least once a week, you and Minho would sneak around and into this secret special room. You'd spend hours talking and messing around, and somehow, you didn't get caught. Or maybe some of the kinder WICKED people were turning a blind eye to two kids enjoying themselves.
Who knows.
It was like this for about a year. Maybe a year and a half.
But, things took a turn.
Minho was starting to revieve praise for his athleticism. He became one of the most physically capable subjects, and it was impossible to get him away from a rigged-up treadmill. So, by the end of the day, he was exhausted. Too tired to be crawling around vents with you.
You were thirteen, maybe fourteen when Minho ended up crawling though your vents again.
Hearing the familiar noise, you're out of your bed before he's even here, your bare feet already on the cold floor as he appears.
"Minho-?"
"I know. I know." He grumbles. "I'm sorry." He says, before you can even get so much as a word in, and it leaves you stunned.
"For what?"
"For like... not being here. For neglecting you, I guess." He shrugs as he runs a hand through his hair.
"Neglect-?" You cut yourself off. "Dude, they've been working you to the bone. You don't have to apologise."
He sighs, seemingly of relief. "Yeah, well, I still feel like a dick. You're my best friend."
"Well, you're here now." You attempt to reassure him. "We can go back to the sky room."
He shakes his head. "Nah. I was thinking we could go exploring." He flashes that damn grin at you again.
"...exploring?" You raise a brow, crossing your arms.
"Yeah. Yanno- like me, Newt and Thomas used to do."
"I never joined in with that."
"Well- you should've. And we were exploring when we found the sky room, so you're no so innocent." He chuckles, and you can't help but admit he's right. Yet, he continues at your hesitation. "Look, we found that room by chance. Surely there's more cool and interesting things to find. I'm getting bored of looking at the same fake sky everyday."
Something in that comment stings. You'd never gotten bored of that pretend sky. Maybe because you'd always been with him - and you could never get bored of him.
"C'mon." He drags out the syllable. "One night of exploration. Just one. Who knows how far they'll be making me run from now on. Better take the chance whilst you have it."
You playfully shove him at this. "...fine. One time only. Okay?"
"Okay." He smiles. "Let's go."
So, once again, you find yourself creeping around the sleeping facility with your far too confident best friend.
Though, when Minho reaches a locked door, you would've never expected him to slip an excess card out of his shoe, swiping it into the card reader.
"What? Where did you get that?" You hiss, wide-eyed and stunned.
"Some dumb lab-coat dude left it on the side. So, I picked it up. Finders, keepers." He says as he pushes the door open.
Sneaky around is one thing, finding hidden rooms through vents - but stealing an ID card is something else. You're literally never going to see each other again if you get caught. Not that you get chance to voice your concerns as Minho walks into the room.
This sinking feeling creeps into your gut, yet, you can't find it in yourself to tell Minho. What if he really is starting to find you boring? Being whiney to him about this would only confirm that. You don't need him getting closer with someone else, especially not the flocks of girls in the dining hall who have started taking interest in the boy since he started his physical training.
Okay. Maybe this is creeping beyond friendship. It was years ago, but you're always thinking about the way he held your hand the first time you found that room. How it was just yours. Your special place, just for the two of you. And he doesn't want to go there anymore?
You've never felt so insecure.
So, you keep quiet.
The first room is full of labelled chemicals you don't understand.
The second is full of strange, clouded tubes, with slimy, creatures with metal arms. Even Minho was eager to leave that one - to remain ignorant for his own bliss, pulling you along once you stop to stare into the tubes. You suspect Thomas mentioned something to him. Thomas has always been Ava's favourite.
Though, the third is far less scary. It's a office - well, more like a small library with a computer and a desk. Filing cabinets liter the walls with endless documents.
Minho lets out a low whistle. "A computer." He grins, casually sliding into the office chair as he starts fiddling with the computer. Having most of the common sense in this friendship, you've assumed that the computer is password locked.
Which is confirmed by Minho's hushed cursing.
So, you start looking through the documents in the drawers. A lot of them are medical files and general testing that you don't really understand.
Though, a few documents contain blueprints and titles such as "the Maze Trails" and "The Scorch Trails". They're detailed and confusing.
"Minho-" you gets his attention, passing him the notes as he's distracted from the computer, a puzzled expression crossing his face as he looks through them.
He doesn't get much time to comment as you find another interesting drawer; labelled "Subjects."
Flicking through a few, you recognise the pictures of the people you've spent the last few years with. Teresa. Thomas. Gally.
You stumble upon Minho's- grinning at his awful mugshot style photo. A7. The Leader. They've already got him marked down pretty faithfully.
Though, something consistent through all the documents is the phrase "status: Immune." Something about that stands out to you, for some reason.
That is until you reach Newt's file.
Staus: Nonimmune. Control Variable.
Nonimmune?
Nonimmune.
"Uh, Minho-?"
"These maps are insane." He mumbles, still examining the blueprints. "Do you reckon these are those big plans Thomas is always yapping about?" He picks his head up to look at you, noticing your face drop, concern written throughout your features. "What? What is it?"
"...we're all immune to the Flare, right? That's why they're testing us. To find a cure?" You don't even look up at him.
"Yeah..? Why else would we be here?" His grin is there, same as always, but now it's uneasy and uncertain. You look at him, before walking over and slapping Newt's file onto the table.
It takes him a moment to catch on, but when he does, his face drops, and he just looks at you.
Before any words are exchanged, footsteps can be heard from down a corridor.
"Shit-" you both scramble, collecting all the papers and stuffing them in whatever drawer they came from (or whichever is closest.)
It's a mad dash to get out of the room - adrenaline and fear coursing through you both. You didn't even find your own file.
Are you immune? Could the Flare get you?
Little do you know, Minho is internally freaking out over the same thing.
In your panic, your silence evades you, which alerts whatever guard was prowling the building.
"Quick! Up here!" Minho commands as he struggles to open a vent, giving you a leg up before yanking himself up the wall and diving in.
You don't even know where you're crawling to, you're just trying to rush away. But, eventually, it goes quiet, only the sounds of yours and Minho's panting in the small vent system.
"We have to tell Newt." You say, managing to turn in the small space to face him. Minho hesitates for a moment, but nods.
Of course you have to tell him.
"Yeah, at lunch, tomorrow. We'll tell him. But right now, we have to get back to our rooms. They'll be checking." You nod in agreement. "Let's get you back first."
Minho has a far better memory than you, leading you back to the safety of the room before he turns to navigate the way back to his.
"Minho-" you say, turning to look at him once your feet hut the floor, a sense of dread overwhelming you.
"..yeah?"
You can only look at him. There's so much you want to say, but none of it want to come out. Some deep gut feeling screams at you that this is the end, but you tell yourself you're being silly.
His blank expression pushes you to talk, though.
"Just.. be careful."
He offers a warm smile, but rolls his eyes. "Yeah, yeah. I'll be fine. Don't worry about me. See you at lunch tomorrow."
Your attempt to mimic his expression falls flat as he shimmies back into the vent and on his way.
You didn't know how accurate your instincts would be.
The next day, you make your way to the lunch hall. You're late- your lab testing ended up being longer than possible. But when you enter the dining hall, Minho's absence is quickly noted.
Though, you do spot Newt. Maybe Minho's running has gone overtime, again?
"Newt-" you shout him, jogging across the hall. "Have you seen Minho? We need to talk to you."
Newt doesn't even have to say anything as he glances at Thomas, whose eyes are burning into the table in front of him. There's some sense of desperation in Newt's expression, mixed with grief and regret, but like he can't say anything.
It makes your stomach flip and your heart stop as you open your mouth to speak, but you don't get any sound out.
"(Y/N)." Janson's annoying voice sends a chill down your spine as you turn to look at him. Two guards stand by his sides, his forced grimace doesn't reach his cold, unforgiving gaze. "I need a word."
Janson gestures for you to walk with him and you swallow a lump in your throat. Your first instinct is to run. Like Minho thought you. But in a room full of people? It's not like your quiet escapades in the middle of the night.
Your feet are like concrete as you force yourself to walk towards him.
Janson walks in front of you, the guards behind you. You're trapped, and even if you did run, that wouldn't change anything as he leads you into a room. It's a room you're familiar with.
It's where you have one-on-one progress conversations with Janson to discuss how you're doing. Minho spent more time in here than you ever did, but that doesn't mean the confines space doesn't fill you with anxiety, even in normal circumstances.
You take your place in the cold chair as Janson sits across from you, the slab of metal that is meant to be a table keeping you separated feels like a godsend. Though, not much of one with the guards breathing down your neck.
"...Where's Minho?" You manage to croak, attempting to mimic your missing friends confidence.
"He's been dealt with." Janson says, and your blood runs cold.
"What- what does that mean?"
"I'm sure you already know what that means. From your adventures last night." The world stops.
You knew.
You knew it was a bad idea and your own insecurities led you to keeping your mouth shut and hiding away from your concerns. What? Because of a stupid crush? Your own feelings of inadequacy have led to Minho's demise. And it's soul-crushing.
"I-I don't understand." You words falter, any false confidence quickly shattering.
"It's a shame. Really. It is." Janson nods as he leans forward, his elbows on the table. "We let yours and Subject A7's strange relationship slide because it was showing promising results. New waves in the Killzone we were examining. I knew we should've stopped it." He sighs. "...and now, you know too much."
"Where is he?" You spit, fists clenched, unused adrenaline causing you to tremble.
"I told you." Janson hisses. "You already know. But don't worry. You're not going to remember any of this." Janson nods towards the guards.
"What-" your words catch at a sharp sting in the side of your neck as one of the masked-men injects a burning liquid into you. You gasp, grasping the side of your neck. "What have you done?"
Your words slur slightly as a dull buzz fizzles into your vision, your head feeling light.
"My job." Janson leans back as he watches you sway in your seat. "What was always going to happen."
You can't even respond as your limp body slips out of the seat, and your consciousness leaves you before you even hit the floor.
WHOOP WHOOP. 1K BABYYYYY.
I guess this is my 1k follower post - and it's angst. That's typical of me. Sorry for the massive gap since I last posted something, but everyone's support has given me a drive to write. Well, at least finish writing this. Sorry if its not everything you wanted, but I've always felt there's something so much sadder about not getting that chance to say goodbye to someone, and things fizzing out instead of a bang.
Anyway, I hope you enjoyed :)
#🌿 petri tmr#🍃 petri tmr#🌿 petri writes tmr#🌿 petri tmr minho#tmr minho#minho the maze runner#minho tmr#the maze runner#minho x reader#tmr fanfiction#minho maze runner#minho tmr x reader
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we tangle endlessly like lovers entwined
(steddie | explicit | 3.4k | AO3 | cw: unsafe sex, very brief mention of canonical child neglect/abuse)
This was written as my entry for @eddiemonth and the prompt "parents" as well as for @kinktober2023 and the prompt "hand holding".
Summary: Eddie and Steve are friends with benefits but when Eddie acts weird during one of their hookups, things change. Or: It's canon Steve likes to hold hands during sex.
"Fu - uck, is that all you got, Harrington?" Eddie asks, his voice thinner than he'd like it to be. But damn if Steve's long, thick finger in his ass doesn't take the breath out of his lungs.
His grip on the headboard of Steve's bed is white-knuckled and a shiver runs through his naked body as he continues to writhe under Steve's ministrations. Eddie is already keyed up, his skin too tight for his body, and he needs... he needs...
"Another one, come on. I need more." He gasps, using the headboard to push back against Steve's finger. "Don't be a fucking pussy, I won't break. I'm not one of the delicate girls you usually—"
Smack
The sound is loud in the enclosed space of Steve's room.
Eddie's groan is even louder.
"I have no idea what's gotten into you, man, but stop acting like you're possessed or you won't get any of my fingers. Let alone my cock."
And then Steve makes good on his words, pulling his finger out of Eddie and no. No, no, no... Eddie doesn't realize he's babbling until Steve's other hand strokes his back soothingly, his deep voice reassuring.
"Hey, it's okay, Eddie. I got you. You gonna let me set the pace? Be a good boy?"
Another sound rips from Eddie's throat, a desperate one, wet and needy. "'Ye-yeah, gonna be good, so good. Please, Steve, need it. Fuck me hard. Please, please, please."
Two fingers, slippery and cold, thrust into him and he moans, the relief palpable. Steve doesn't even wait for Eddie to get used to the intrusion. He just picks up where he left off, pumping his fingers in and out of Eddie at a brutal pace right from the start. Eddie wants to sob at how good it feels, his mind finally starting to empty, making room for Steve and only Steve, just as his insides make room for Steve's thick and veiny cock. His perfect cock that Eddie thinks about more often than he would ever admit out loud.
"This what you want? For me to fuck you like this? Hard and fast, so you can still feel it tomorrow?"
Eddie tries to nod, tries to speak, but his words won't come. Instead, more needy sounds roll off his tongue, sounds so desperate that he can’t swallow them, no matter how hard he tries. His hips push back against the onslaught of Steve's fingers, urging him on, wordlessly begging him for more, always more. It's not about feeling it tomorrow, it's about—
When Eddie feels a third finger pressing against his hole, he snaps at Steve, forgetting his promise to be good. "I don't need another finger, I want you to fuck me. Stop playing around and give me your cock. I thought that's what we're here for."
"Don't wanna hurt you, Eddie, lemme just—"
"I don't care. I need you to fucking fuck me already, okay? Hurt me. Ruin me, goddamn it, but stop acting like we're making love or some shit."
Eddie can feel Steve freezing up behind him and a part of him feels bad for the way he is behaving. It's not that either of them has to wine and dine the other, theirs is not that kind of relationship. But they’re still friends.
Friends who like to fuck each other's brains out, but friends nonetheless.
Still, they usually take their time. Heavy make out sessions, mouths and hands on each other's bodies. Eddie fingering Steve for so long that he was coming dry by the time Eddie finally fucks him, his hole so loose and sloppy with lube that Eddie's cock sinks in like a knife in warm butter. When it's quick and desperate, it’s usually trading messy hand- or blow jobs, both of them too impatient for any kind of foreplay. Just quick and dirty hookups in the video store break room or in the shower before they have to start their day.
But today, Eddie needs it hard and fast. Today, Eddie needs Steve to fuck every thought out of his head until all he can think about is the ache in his body from being used, from being owned, from being ruined. He needs it to hurt.
Today, Eddie needs to forget.
Because if he can't get out of his head, he doesn't know what he's going to do. There is a monster inside of him, with his father's face, his sneering voice, and his spiteful words. This monster has sharp teeth and even sharper claws that will hurt anything that gets in its way.
It used to hurt Eddie the most. But also Wayne. And Gareth and Jeff and Freak. It might hurt Dustin now. Or Steve.
Eddie doesn't want that, doesn't want to hurt anyone, so he needs... something. Something to forget the fucking letter.
The fucking letter from that fucking asshole who calls himself his father, when the only person who ever deserved that name was Wayne. Asking Eddie for money of all things. He hasn't heard from him since he took Eddie with him when he robbed that liquor store and left Eddie behind when the police came. They caught up with him less than an hour later.
It was the worst and the best day of Eddie's life because while he found out that his father didn't give a shit about him, he also has been living with Wayne ever since.
And now this asshole has the nerve to ask him and Wayne for money.
Eddie wants to scream. He wants to hit something.
He is afraid of hitting someone.
So he can't get high. Can't get wasted. Can't lose control.
That's why he's here, with Steve, hoping that Steve will take the control from him. Just for a little while.
Just until he settles back into his skin.
"I don't think we should be doing this. Something is clearly wrong." Steve sounds worried, his voice soft and his hand firm on Eddie's hip, as if to keep Eddie from just taking what he wants.
Then Steve moves again, slowly withdrawing his fingers, and Eddie panics. Before his brain can provide any input, he lets go of the headboard and his left hand wraps around Steve's wrist before he can fully withdraw his fingers.
It's the first time he's seen Steve's face since Steve pushed him onto the bed, face down and ass up, and the expression Eddie finds there makes something inside of him clench painfully. Steve looks pale, his eyebrows are drawn together in a deep frown and his lips are thin, confusion and displeasure in every line of his beautiful face.
Eddie screwed up. Again. Just like his old man, using someone who cares about him for his own gain and hurting him in the process.
"Steve—" He doesn't know what to say, doesn't know how to make it right. Goosebumps break out all over his body, but he feels too hot, his skin stretched thin. There is lead in his stomach, in his veins, making everything heavy and shit, he feels tears prickle in his eyes.
Steve must notice some of the turmoil inside him, his eyes widening at what he sees in Eddie's face. He grabs Eddie's hand where it's wrapped around his wrist to keep him still as he pulls his fingers completely out of Eddie's body and Eddie hangs his head in defeat.
This is it.
Now Steve will ask him to get dressed and leave, telling him that this is not what he signed up for, that it's too much.
That Eddie is too much.
"Can you turn around for me?"
Eddie's head jerks up at Steve's words. He must have heard him wrong. But when he looks back into Steve's face, all he sees are searching hazel eyes, still warm in his solemn face. "What?"
"Turn around? I'll fuck you like you want, but I want to look at you."
Eddie's cock has gone almost all the way back to soft since their exchange, but Steve's words, their implication, are enough to bring it back to half-mast in no time. He clumsily gets up on his knees and turns around so that he's on his back with his legs spread on either side of Steve.
Steve looks down at him with a hungry look as Eddie spreads them even wider, exposing himself completely, a silent surrender.
That's when it hits him.
They have never fucked like this before. To be fair, they only really fucked a handful of times, mostly from behind.
And one memorable time, Steve had fucked him against a wall.
He still thinks about that one when he's home alone with his hard dick in his fist, whimpering every time he remembers how it felt to be held up by straining arms. How it felt to have his thighs pressed tightly against Steve's waist, his arms wrapped around his broad shoulders as Steve pounded into him.
But they had never fucked missionary before.
Steve crawls forward on his knees, his eyes never leaving Eddie's face as Eddie watches his heavy cock swing between his legs, waiting for it to touch him. When it does, dragging along his inner thigh, Eddie feels the pre-cum smear across his skin, matting the fine hair.
He's jolted out of his fixation by Steve's hand on his chin, turning his head back up. "My eyes are up here, Munson."
Eddie grins, for the first time almost forgetting why he was so upset in the first place. "Aww, I know. And they're almost as pretty as your dick." As he says this tongue-in-cheek, he reaches down and wraps his fist around Steve. He pumps the shaft a few times, his grip too shallow to really do anything but spread some of the wetness leaking from the tip along Steve's length. Batting his eyelashes at Steve, he adds, "Will you finally fuck me with it?"
Searching for Eddie's gaze and holding it with his own, Steve leans all his weight on his left arm where it rests beside Eddie on the bed and reaches between them. Steve's hand, so much bigger than Eddie's, surrounds his and draws it away from his cock. For a second, Eddie thinks he's read it all wrong, but Steve doesn't pull away.
Instead, he laces their fingers together and lifts their joined hands up over Eddie's head.
Butterflies take flight in Eddie's stomach, filling his insides and chasing away his dark thoughts. He feels like he could float away if it were not for Steve's body anchoring him. Steve's hazel eyes look down at him, soft despite the hunger simmering in them, and he leans down to capture Eddie's lips in a surprisingly tender kiss.
Lowering his naked body onto Eddie's, their heated skin touching from head to toe, Steve almost immediately slides his tongue into Eddie's mouth. And yet there is something almost chaste about this whole moment. The way Steve kisses him feels like a Sunday morning spent in bed, the sun warming him as he stretches lazily, his whole body humming with contentment. Eddie lets himself melt into the mattress and a sigh spills from his mouth into Steve's.
"There you are," Steve murmurs against Eddie's mouth before descending on him again. The wet sound of their lips against each other and their panting breaths is loud enough to drown out his thoughts for a while, but it's not enough. The thoughts creep back, not even the feel of Steve's tongue in his mouth or the way his hard cock keeps sliding against Eddie's sweat soaked skin is enough to keep them at bay.
Pressing his knees against Steve's hips, Eddie tries to get him to move, the frantic energy from earlier returning and he needs...he needs...
"Steve," Eddie whimpers as soon as he catches his breath, his mouth tingling from their kisses, "Please."
Steve doesn't answer, at least not verbally. What he does is squeeze Eddie's hand as his mouth leaves Eddie's to kiss his cheek and down his throat, distracting Eddie enough that he doesn't even notice Steve reaching for the lube or coating his cock with it. It comes as a surprise when he feels the slick head of it nudging against his entrance.
He gasps out Steve's name, only to have it swallowed by the man himself as Steve pushes into him.
It's not the first time, but it feels like it, the feeling of Steve overwhelming as he fills Eddie inch by tantalizing inch and Eddie squeezes his hand so hard it must hurt.
Steve never stops, never hesitates as he slides inside him and it feels like it will never end. Just more and more of his hot flesh making its home inside Eddie until he can feel it in his gut, in his fucking throat.
They both moan as Steve's hipbones finally press against his ass.
As he pulls out almost all the way again, Steve squeezes Eddie's hand before slamming back into him with a force he has never used before. With each sharp thrust, more of the choked up sounds are punched out of Eddie's body. A particularly hard one pushes Eddie higher up on the mattress and he clings to Steve's body with his legs around his waist. Their hands are still intertwined and it feels like a lifeline, keeping him grounded in the here and now as Steve grinds impossibly deeper into him.
Steve is fucking him just like Eddie asked him to, hard and fast and teetering on the edge of too much. And yet Eddie can't help but think that it feels like Steve is making love to him. Like he's carving a place for himself inside of Eddie, fusing himself into Eddie's essence until you can't tell where one ends and the other begins.
It feels like no one has ever wanted Eddie as much as Steve.
The thought draws a wet sob from his lungs and eager lips catch the sound before it spills out of the intimate bubble they built around their writhing bodies. Steve kisses him like it's the only thing keeping him alive and Eddie has never felt this way before.
Wanted and cherished.
Loved.
They've never talked about what they are to each other outside of their friendship, let alone love, but Eddie can't help but think the word over and over again. Lovelovelove, like a mantra. The despised words from his letter are drained from his mind like venom from a snake bite by Steve's mouth. Steve's hands, and especially his cock with its intoxicating slide against his inner walls, is the remedy Eddie craved.
"Steve," he moans, hoping Steve hears all the things he couldn't say. "I'm close, so close."
Pressing his body harder into Eddie's, Steve leans closer and whispers in his ear, "Me too, baby. Feels so good around me, fuck. Can you come like that, just on my cock fucking you?"
He has never done it before, always needed a hand on him to finish, but Eddie thinks he can this time. It's different. It feels different. The way Steve's hairy belly rubs against his own cock trapped between them, while Steve's thick length presses into him, its head dragging against his prostate, it all makes the coil of desire inside him tighten.
"Yeah, just keep going, keep going," Eddie babbles. A shiver runs through him at the sensation of Steve's tongue flicking against his ear before licking a wet line up his neck.
"Taste so good," Steve hums contentedly into his ear as his hips pick up speed again. "My good boy, so sweet, so good for me, you're perfect."
Squeezing Steve's hand again, Eddie matches the rhythm of his thrust, muscles clenching around the thick head, pressing harder against where his pleasure burns the hottest.
"That's it, take what you need, baby. So beautiful. All for me, only for me." Steve sounds reverent as he says this, his voice full of wonder. Like he can't believe his luck, like it's not Eddie who's thanking his lucky stars every day to have someone like Steve even look at him. It's incomprehensible to him, the way Steve makes him feel, but Eddie knows he never wants it to end.
"Only for you, no one else makes me feel the way you do," Eddie gasps, too honest, but he can't help it. He'll blame the cock-drunk confessions spilling out of his mouth on his imminent climax, even though he means every single word.
Steve groans at his words like he's been hit, his hips faltering in their relentless assault, no longer slamming into Eddie almost brutally. Instead, he's grinding against him, his hips flush against Eddie's ass as if he's trying to crawl into him. "Eddie, fuckfuckfuck," Steve whines and Eddie feels the hot wetness of his release spilling into him.
Even as he shudders apart on top of him, Steve's hips keep going, urging Eddie to follow. As if Eddie could ever deny him. He clenches harder, bucking his hips just so, and the added friction is enough to push him over the edge as well, spilling between them in hot, messy spurts.
With an exhausted grunt, Steve collapses on top of him, letting Eddie take his weight as he catches his breath. Steve's face is pressed against Eddie's neck and Eddie can feel the hot breath against the cooling sweat on his skin. The hand that isn't clasped with Steve's finds its way to Steve's back, stroking it soothingly.
Eddie feels Steve softening inside him and hisses as Steve shifts his hips enough to slip out of Eddie. A trickle of cum follows, leaking out of his hole and onto the mattress. He tries to hold it in, wanting to keep some of Steve inside him as long as possible, but Steve's length has him gaping, and more drips out the longer he lies there. Eddie knows they will have to clean up soon, and he can feel the mess on his stomach drying, skin and hair sticking together uncomfortably.
He allows himself just a few more minutes of peace and quiet. Steve doesn't seem to mind, judging by the way his fingertips keep running up and down his arm in meaningless patterns.
They are still holding each other's hands.
Eddie swallows the lump in his throat, his voice thick as he tells Steve, "Thank you."
Steve hums in acknowledgment, his fingers never stopping their soothing motion.
"I'm sorry. For...you know. Acting weird."
That makes Steve pause, and Eddie is glad he keeps his head on Eddie's shoulder. He's not sure he can have this conversation with Steve's eyes on him.
“’s okay. Had me worried though. You wanna talk about it?"
No, he really doesn't. But he'll do it anyway, because it's Steve. Eddie takes a deep breath and says, "My father never wanted me. I tried everything to be good enough for him. Learned how to hot-wire cars, pick locks, the works. But he never cared. Left me behind to save his own ass. And now he's asking me for money. Today was the first time I heard from him in a decade, and the only thing he wants is money."
The bitterness in his words sounds muted to his own ears, the burning anger replaced by defeat. There's no point in getting angry about the things you can't change, he knows that.
That doesn't mean they don't hurt.
Letting Eddie's words sink in, they both remain silent. Eddie doesn't expect Steve to say anything because there really isn't much to say. He doesn't want pity or lies about how deep down his father cares, he just can't show it. It's a cheap comfort, not made to last before it cracks and crumbles in his hands.
Steve offers none of these things. Instead, he pushes himself up to look into Eddie's eyes, holding his gaze as he lifts their joined hands to his mouth and presses a soft kiss against the back of Eddie's hand.
"Fuck him. You don't need him. You have Wayne. Your band. The kids." Another kiss, this time on Eddie's lips. "You have me, in any way you want me."
There it is again, at the forefront of his mind.
Love.
"Even in the forever way?"
Steve's smile is blinding as he presses their hands to Eddie's chest, right over his heart.
"Especially in the forever way."
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Unpopular opinion: I don't like Jess and Luke's "reconciliation" in S4... because I don't think they actually repaired anything. I think their dynamic in S4 is like every other parent-child dynamic in Gilmore Girls: unable to break their deeply dysfunctional patterns. (Stop reading now if you love their big hug at the end of S4. I don't want to yuck anybody's yum!)
Liz kicks Jess out and sends him to Luke. And without writing a dissertation about how unstable I think their relationship was the entire time Jess lived there, I'll just say: it wasn't awesome. Better than Liz, absolutely, but not great. And honestly, any good Luke did was destroyed when he angrily kicked Jess out in his moment of desperate need. In short: their relationship was badly damaged prior to S4, and true reconciliation would have to involve actual acknowledgement and repair of that damage. But that's not what happened.
I think you have to examine Luke and Jess' relationship in the context of Liz, because she is a key player here. And to be clear: Liz is Jess' Abuser. She gave him a childhood of chaos and neglect, and when he started to act out because of that... she blamed him, kicked him out, and never spoke to him again. It's difficult to explain just how thoroughly that kind of chronic abuse damages kids. Despite that, Luke prioritizes and protects Liz over Jess. I'm not even blaming Luke; this is a common family dynamic around abusive adults. The other adults in the family deny what's happening, because it's too painful to look at directly.
Liz and Jess both return to Stars Hollow in S4. Liz is given a mild side-eye by Luke, but generally she's welcomed. Jess is... not. Luke shouts at him and makes it VERY clear that Jess is not welcome to stay. He refuses to acknowledge or apologize for the fact that he kicked Jess out or stole his car. Luke shows no concern for where Jess has been living, how he's feeling, or if he has any of his basic needs met. The message is clear: you messed up, kid, and it's your own damn fault. Which is exactly what Liz tells him, by the way... Jess' reaction to her abuse is his fault. (This is part of that family dynamic around abuse; it's easier to blame the angry-looking kid than to examine the abusive behaviors of the adult. In therapy, we refer to this labeling of the kid as "bad" as the "Identified Patient." It's not intentional, but it's a way to deny abuse is happening.)
Things gets worse. Every time Jess tries to set a boundary with Liz - refusing to interfere in her relationship, declining her wedding invitation, saying no to walking her down the aisle - he is chastised. Luke yells at him, insults him, and guilts him. (Luke also takes a moment to shit all over Jess' life and call him a drug dealer. He doesn't give that label to Liz, the actual addict, he gives it to the Identified Patient.) So Jess, who has been totally alone for a year, does what any abused and neglected kid would do: he follows directions in an attempt to gain acceptance.
After a moment of Luke seeming to blame Jess for getting assaulted by his stepfather (again: Identified Patient), Luke makes a glib comment about Jess "hating" Liz. He doesn't want to understand how Jess feels about Liz, though, because that would be too painful to hear. The only thing Luke knows how to do is appease Liz and maintain the appearance of having a happy family. And Jess having a negative feeling about Liz interferes with that. So the message is clear: act happy or just get out of here.
So Jess stops trying to set boundaries or express his feelings. He shuts up, pastes a smile on his face, and dutifully walks his Abuser down the aisle. It's then - and ONLY then - that Luke gives him kindness. That's not reconciliation. That's Luke, unintentionally giving Jess the message that his feelings, boundaries, and safety are secondary to Liz's whims. It's easier to play Happy Family than to actually examine Liz's abuse, Luke's ignoring of that abuse, and do the hard work of repairing.
I see Luke's hug - and his "I'm here Jess, I'm always here" - and it rings hollow for me. Luke has done none of the repair work that would be necessary for a statement like that to carry weight. Nor has he "been there" for Jess at all in the past year. He's plainly prioritized Liz, Jess' Abuser, instead of protecting his nephew, the Identified Patient.
And I don't even blame Luke for that. Luke was deeply entrenched in his own dysfunctional family role. He's been Liz's caretaker for his entire adult life, and he seems to think that he's failing if he doesn't perpetually bail her out of trouble. He can't see past his role of Liz's Enabler and Protector, which is why he could never be an effective guardian to Jess.
S4 doesn't end with Luke and Jess mending fences. It ends with Jess learning that it's his role to shut up and placate Liz, no questions asked. And at the end of all that, Jess goes back to his dirty mattress on the floor and Liz gets to stay in Stars Hollow. Where she is joyfully embraced and fully supported by Luke at every single turn, no matter how many egregious mistakes she makes.
Luke loves Jess, and he does support him in various ways - paying for the car repairs, showing up to Jess' Open House, giving him advice about Rory. There's good stuff there. But it's clear that when push comes to shove, Luke is going to coddle Liz,Jess' Abuser, for the rest of her natural-born life. Jess, the Identified Patient, is on his own.
(By the time we reach AYITL, Jess is also dutifully coddling Liz and bailing her out of trouble. Lesson learned, I guess.)
Luke and Jess love each other, and I wanted a reconciliation for them so badly! But this wasn't it.
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Alright, we need to know. Who are top members of the "looking at women, who're minding their own business, and talking about how sad and concerned you are for them because 'with the way they are, they'll end up single and childless for the rest of their lives and no high value man would give them a chance," club? Like on a sclae of 1-10 how delusional would they become after they realize said woman doesn't give a shit?
Honestly one of my favorite tropes is the whole, “nooo what are you doing living your own life you're supposed to be someone's wife and having babies” thing. Like it has both benevolent aspects (the whole “you'll be happier this way” part) while also having malevolent aspects (the “you're a resource to be used and the resource is being wasted” part).
Like, even irl, there are some men who are like. Discombobulated. Baffled. At the suggestion that a woman can have other priorities in life. The sheer reeling disbelief when he sees a woman that's like 30+ with NO kids, NO husband. Unbelievable. It must be so awful for you, you must be so sad and desperate. Equally worrisome is that you might end up accepting some inferior, unsuitable guy that doesn't have the same Husbandly Quality™ of someone like himself, tragic…
But yes I’ve been thinking about this concept ever since the Diluc escape fic, and I know I’ve talked about him with that concept before, but consider CHILDE would be such a major candidate.
Childe is hopelessly drawn to you if you’re mean.
It’s honestly not healthy for his sake either, but it’s far worse to be on the receiving end. He can’t help it, it’s like waving meat in front of a hungry dog, an irresistible urge to have you.
You’re not exactly high rank, but not much of a subordinate, you’re more of an “other” category, you keep records and files and do a lot of scribe work for a division of units you’re assigned to. Unfortunately for you, higher-ups such as harbingers end up consulting you quite often for records and information… well, most of the time, they send someone else to do such a menial task for them, but he always comes in-person, waltzing in all cheerful and full of youthful energy — and loud, God. You wonder if parents these days have stopped teaching their kids about having an inside voice, because this kid certainly is unfamiliar with the concept.
You scowl, evident disgust on your face as you lazily sort through your records, not about to show any urgency for someone so annoying. You were kind of hoping to irritate him, even. But alas, he’s equally smiley and talkative when you hand him what he’s looking for.
Far too talkative. You’ve already handed him what he needs. Why is he still in here? Now he’s talking to you, asking you the dumbest questions about if you like working here and what you do and blah, blah. You didn’t ask for this. You force yourself to give answers, albeit blunt and short as possible, mostly consisting of yeah-s and sure-s, before the annoyance becomes too much and you ask through clenched teeth if he needs anything else or if he’s done here, an all-too-obvious hint to leave.
Thus marks the beginning of the bane of your existence, because unfortunately, by the will of some malicious higher power, he comes back. Regularly. Habitually. Eventually you start noticing that he isn’t even retrieving anything, half of the time, he’s coming in just to annoy you.
See, for him, it’s not just attraction, but a weird sort of pride thing. That initial coldness draws him in, because it presents a sort of challenge. He’s now overheard other people say the same thing, that you’re cold and mean to everyone.
Based on looks alone, he thinks, you’re old enough that you should be married. Maybe that’s why you’re so mean, you’re just bitter or something. Maybe you had bad luck and got hurt a bunch and now you’re all guarded. That’s actually kind of cute.
Naturally… well, naturally for him and whatever’s wrong with him, at least, it sparks an obsession. He likes chases, challenges. Things that are hard to get are that much more satisfying to obtain, you know? The feeling of having won, the feeling of being better than everyone else, knowing that he accomplished something other people can’t and now reaps the rewards, and the pride and ego boost that comes with it — that sort of thing is an intoxicating fuel, a motivator unlike anything else one could offer him. This does not combine well with the fact that he’s young and hot-blooded and in possession of a hair-triggered sexual aggression, not to mention a sense of pride for which the word ‘no’ doesn’t have any meaning.
It’s kind of sad though. Wasting your life away in some menial job, you’ll be so lonely and regretful.
You’re very lucky, then, that he takes pity on your plight. It will all work out.
Because he can fix you.
And he knows that that's just how you are — he's already composed multiple potential sad backstories that explain your behavior in a way that makes you seem cutely pitiable, that writes off your attitude as being ultimately due to being sensitive and afraid of vulnerability, very endearing — he's not deterred by you pushing him away.
In fact, he realizes, once you've opened up to him and he's forced you to expose the vulnerable side of yourself, you'll probably feel bad for all the times you were mean to him. You'll shuffle even closer (in the scene that plays out in his mind, see, you'll be in bed, naked, face buried against his chest, all clingy and needy) and quietly sheepishly mutter out apologies and ask him to forgive you.
Or maybe after a while, if he keeps being nice to you, you'll break down and cry and be more honest about how sad and lonely you are and how much you need him and then he'll be right there to hold you close and promise to be there for you, it'll be really sweet and will make him very happy. He's already planned out several lines to say that should elicit enjoyable reactions.
It will be so cute. It will feel so good. It’s just a matter of winning you over at this point.
Which, you see, proves to be the difficult part.
He’s getting there, he’s certain, you’re just a little more stubborn than he anticipated.
He’s already started trying to work his way there, during his regular visits. He’s already asked you if you’re married, watched the way your face turned all sour the moment the word came out and the way you rolled your eyes before you muttered a no. Ah. Sore spot, then, as expected.
And then asks if you have kids — because the first answer doesn't necessarily negate that possibility, and ‘jaded single mom with a bad ex' is one of the potential backstories he's theorized for you, so, it's worth asking. You still say no.
The ideal response, then, is—
That's too bad. You would make a good mother!
You narrow your eyes and glare like he's just said the most vile thing you've ever heard. But it's okay, it's cute that you’re so defensive (because you know he’s right and it’s what you really want).
It doesn't matter what you say, any words that come out of your mouth will be filtered through his delusions to match the reality he's already decided is the case.
You say you don't want to get married, this means you actually really do, you say you don't need a man, which means you actually really do and are aware of it and it bothers you, you say you're fine by yourself, which means you're very lonely, it's practically a cry for help.
He'll keep being nice, no matter how much you push back. He can tell it's just because you're sensitive. Maybe you think someone as young and charming as him wouldn't sincerely like you, and you're being defensive? That's probably it. Aw. That makes him feel good.
Poor thing. You're so defensive, so guarded. It's endearing, even if it's starting to get a little frustrating. But it will just take a little more work before he gets through to you, and then everything will work out perfectly… and then he’ll have a nice trophy for all his efforts, can savor the defeat and vulnerability you’ll show. You'll become so meek and submissive and it'll be just for him and no one else. It’ll be so nice. Just a little more time.
#i cant help but believe this man has the worst 'i can fix her' complex of any guy to ever live#.ch#.miso
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★ ﹒ PARENTAL SKILLS
you seem to have more parental skills than the actual parent, so why not have a child of your own?
cw : BREEDING KINK , heavy usage of the word ‘mamas’
a/n : my toji obsession is getting lethal.
dilf toji! who's so obsessed with the way you treat his child, despite megumi not being one of your own.
dilf toji! who listens to all of your scoldings with a smirk on his face when he clearly shows his bad parenting skills.
dilf toji! who cares greatly about megumi, but is completely clueless when it comes to being a father.
dilf toji! who, although doesn't know how to be a parent, wants another child because you're such a good step mother.
dilf toji! who shows you just how much he wants another child when megumi is off with his mother for the weekend...
toji was surprisingly being less rough than usual. his arms were wrapped around your body, calloused hands rubbing on your soft skin. he was stuffed deep inside of you, thrusting slow, but still giving it to you a bit rough like always.
your hands were grasping tightly onto the sheets, legs trembling from the several orgasms he managed to pull from you. there were dried up tears on your face, eyes shut as you listened to the words toji whispered in your ear.
"such a good girl f'me, mama. takin' me so good..." he spoke, leaning down to kiss your neck.
honestly, you were on the verge of falling out right then and there. you were worn out, and toji hadn't even came yet. he'd been edging himself for the longest, while you were making the sheets wet beneath you. however, as long as toji felt good, it was worth it.
"g'na give it to you... g'na fill you up so much." he groaned.
he was so big inside of you, your tight walls stretching to adjust to his thick size. every time you came, you'd squeeze him tightly with a whimper, limbs spasming in bliss. there was a slow drag of his cock, causing your whines to be drawled with each push of his tip against your sweet spot.
"so fuckin' tight, baby." he spoke. "shit... gonna cum, mama. gonna put all my kids inside ya... fuck, y'want that? want your belly to be all round with my baby in it?"
"yes... yes, please, toji...!" you whimpered, vision getting blurry as tears began to fall once more.
you were moaning—, loudly, beginning to get desperate for him to fill you up. the pain felt ridiculously good, your eyes rolling back and saliva slightly falling from the side of your mouth.
"yeah... yeah, give it t'me, mama. c'mon..." his voice was fucked out and hoarse, his gentle touch beginning to get tighter.
you were inhaling sharply through your mouth, voice wavering with every word uttered. you could barely take it anymore.
he was pounding into you, the sound of wet skin clapping resonating throughout the dimly lit room. toji was using his free hand to rub your clit to add stimulation, bringing you closer to your orgasm. your brain was like mush, thoughts all foggy and words slurred and incoherent.
you could feel yourself cumming again, tightening around his fat cock. all you could do was let out a hushed gasp, muscles convulsing in both relief and bliss.
"oh fuck... oh fuckkkk..." toji groaned, eyes slightly rolling back as a big load of his cum spurted inside of you, painting your insides white and stuffing you full.
toji slowly let you down, still thrusting inside of you to settle down after edging himself. he panted, rubbing your body to calm you down.
“did such a good job f’me today, mama. love you…”
he slowly pulled out, taking a look at how your pussy oozed with a mix of your juices and his cum.
"ah, look at that..." he chuckled.
weeks later, you chose to sit megumi down when he was back to stay with you and toji. he was very skeptical toward you two, seeing toji chuckling and you clearly irritated with him.
“megumi,” you spoke.
“…what?”
“i’m—.”
“she’s pregnant, man! y’re gonna have a little… somethin’. aren’t ya ex—?” toji’s words were cut off by you punching him on his head, resulting in him staying silent.
“um… yeah. that’s… what i wanted to tell you.” you shyly spoke.
after a moment of keeping silent eye contact with megumi, you spoke up.
“…megumi?”
“is that it?”
“huh—?”
“is that all you wanted to tell me?”
“well, yeah—…”
“…that’s great, but i’m not very surprised.”
#anime#manga#anime x reader#jjk x reader#toji smut#jjk toji#jujutsu kaisen toji#toji zenin#toji fushiguro#toji x reader#dilf toji#gojo x reader#jjk smut#nanami x reader#geto x reader#choso x reader#jujutsu toji#toji x y/n#toji x you
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I'm desperately needing some mpreg for Adam, it's been one of those days 😫
Maybe simmer!Adam and Luci have a one night stand at the hotel, Lucifer freaks slightly because how could he have sex with the guy who tried to kill Charlie (even tho Adam apologized for it already- get over it Lucifer) and he still loves Lilith.
So he just retreats to his mansion for a few weeks, making excuses to Charlie. He still comes to the hotel but it's only brief visits.
Adams putting up a good front but he'd just feeling like shit cause Lucifer just up and left him- again. After a few weeks of feeling like shit, he finds out he's pregnant. And to his surprise, he's not mad or freaking out about it, but instead he's super excited and strangely comfortable.
When Luci starts pulling himself together and spending more time at the hotel (he still doesn't interact with Adam cause he's a prideful bitch), he notices how much of a better mood Adams in, he's constantly smiling, but when he's by himself, he has a different smile, one that almost matched Lilith when she was pregnant with Charlie.
He decides to finally talk with Adam when he goes to the lobby late at night, everyone's asleep so he was surprised to see Adam sitting on one of the couches, hands on his stomach, smiling.
Lucifer wasn't going to talk to him, but he couldn't help how curious he was in what made this huge change in Adam.
Adam sours a little bit, seeing Lucifer, so he turns his focus to the tv. After an annoying amount of small talk, Adam goes off on Lucifer, telling him how much of an asshole he was for leaving him again, that he hasn't changed since Eden, and just sees Adam as some play thing.
Lucifer watches as he storms off. But he feels like there's more to this than Adam being mad at him. So while the hotel guests are doing their group exercises, Lucifer decides to snoop around Adams room. He eventually finds a bunch of positive pregnancy tests in Adams bathroom.
He sits on his bed and waits for Adam to come back. At first he was really shocked, then happy. But the more he thought about it, he got pissed off. How could Adam not tell him? How could he have a kid with Adam, literally an enemy to hell, himself and Charlie?
He's basically pissed at himself but he's too prideful for that, so he thinks he can drove Adam off by saying horrible things about how they can't have a child together, no kid deserves to have Adam as a parent, that Lucifer doesn't want him so why would their kid? He wants Adam to argue back, call him every name under the sun because he deserves it. But he's shocked that Adam just sits on his bed, and cries.
Lucifer feels like absolute shit, especially when Charlie runs in because of her dad yelling. She quickly confronts Adam, who just leans into her, trying to hide himself. Seeing the look Charlie gives him, just kills him and hearing Adams heavy crying doesn't help. He just hands Charlie one of his pregnancy tests.
Lucifer: he's pregnant- with my kid
Adams shaking in fear, and tries to pull away from Charlie, he's terrified that Lucifer just outed him to the one person trying to help him. But Charlie holds on tighter.
Charlie: maybe you should go to your room dad, just until Adam calms down and we can talk, but you being here isn't helping right now.
Lucifer: i- ...yeah, okay
Lucifer can't sleep that night because he can still hear Adams cries.
That's all I have, I just need angst goddammit
Alright, I'll leave you alone 😫
Oh god that got angsty so fast! Lucifer you asshole!
Good luck talking your way out of that one.
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Brushing off some of our older gaming stuff to finally play "The Force Unleashed" (do not spoil it for me) and found myself immediately compelled by this presentation of what Luke Skywalker's life might have been like as "Darth Vader's son". (Or Leia's life, of course.)
Like, obviously, Darth Vader would not (and will not, I presume) have the same degree of attachment to his assassin here as he would/will to Luke, but the parallels are immediate and not subtle. Vader has killed a LOT of Jedi children by this point, but he sees a child powerful in the Force holding his own red lightsaber and something in him apparently snaps. And in the similar circumstances of 1) raised in secret away from the Emperor, and 2) trained to be a weapon against the Emperor, I suspect that Luke would actually have had a very similar quality of life to Starkiller (slightly better overall perhaps, but still similar), because I highly doubt that Sith Lord Darth Vader, who is held together by rage and spite, who is super traumatized by war and haaaaates being confronted by his own mistakes, would have ended up being even a half-decent parent if permitted to actually raise Luke as a Sith apprentice.
I was reminded of these games because I saw someone talking about how Galen Marek (protagonist of "The Force Unleashed") and Mara Jade (Luke's love interest from the Extended Universe) have very similar backstories and arcs, though they felt Galen's was better executed. So, I started up this game wondering to myself, "How old is Galen compared to Luke? A romance between Luke and his father's assassin / apprentice seems compelling... At worst, I bet it's comparable to the age difference between Luke and Din..." And yep! It looks similar and could also be fewer years than that. Galen could be 19 in this game for all I know.
I'm already enjoying an AU premise where Darth Vader somehow finds and captures younger teenage Luke, but he's panicking because 1) his son already hates him for injuring or even killing Obi-Wan (let's say that Owen and Beru are spared somehow, and also already calling up the Rebellion to fight the Empire to get their nephew back), and 2) Vader reeeeeally doesn't want the Emperor to find out about his son. But he doesn't really have a convenient place to stash his secret son! Palpatine is already calling demanding to know why Vader hasn't already completed some urgent imperial business.
So, Vader has to call his Ventress-in-training, Agent Starkiller, who happens to be nearby, to temporarily take Luke into custody. Vader says that no harm is to befall Luke and if he dies, then so does Starkiller, before he has to run off to answer the suspicious Emperor. Galen is, like, maybe 18 or something. (Ahsoka was kicking ass and getting traumatized on the battlefield at 14ish, so I assume that Galen's childhood under Vader was demanding and terrible.) This Sith teenager wants to be doing cool shit to prove himself, not shoved into a Bodyguard AU with some whiny brat who bites and has way too much of Darth Vader's attention already.
Cue some adventure that causes Luke and Galen to bond somehow. I'm not thinking about anything romantic at this point, I'm mostly thinking about angst, as Darth Vader tries to train Luke as a Sith apprentice through brutally cruel methods. Which give both Luke and Galen a lot of intense and complicated feelings about their own and each other's situations. And probably culminates in Darth Vader being shocked and angry when his son and not-son have run off and unionized against him.
The earlier that Vader nabs Luke, the longer you can shove him and Galen together. I'm leaning more towards a "The Worst Summer Teenage Romance Ever (During Sith Apprentice Boot Camp)" setup, even if it means bending the ages around a little, but I think that a "Childhood Friendship Forged Through Trauma And Desperation For Affection While Being Raised By A Sith Lord Who Is Playing Favorites" setup has great potential as well.
I like the potential humor of Luke initially being utterly unfamiliar with the Force and being unable to do anything with it, he doesn't even know how to lift a rock, while Video Game Protagonist Galen is like, "Okay, this soothes some of my terror about being replaced, but seriously, how are you this helpless??? You are like a Tooka kitten to me, what the hell is this???"
I also like the potential angst of Luke and Galen being forcibly separated somehow, so that Luke can escape and meet up with the likes of Han Solo and Princess Leia somehow, and he's all sad because the guy he liked is probably dead or else hates him. And then I like the potential humor of Galen showing up again as a real freak of nature, a human hurricane, just throwing everything around with the Force, waving a red lightsaber around. Luke has hearts in his eyes, while Han is like, "So, uh, this is the dead boyfriend, huh? Yikes."
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10.1 in review series for Dragon Age Veilguard
70 hours in, 68 actual gameplay
Obligatory I'm not an asshole disclaimer, feel free to skip to the cut.
Something came to my attention. I need to make it crystal clear that I utterly love the diversity in DAV. It's fantastic. I'm also a heavily left leaning, non-binary, queer as fuck reviewer, editor, and author.
I'm on media blackout while I play this, so I'm only getting second-hand info on how awful it is right now in the DA Fandom. Please be safe and take care of yourselves. Arguing with incels and white supremacists is completely pointless. They sea lion worse than an actual sea lion. Your mental health is important.
Though, every single time the anti-queer brigade comes out for a new DA game, I sit there thinking 'have you bozos ever played any DA game, like, ever?' My guess is nope.
Spoilers for Dragon Age Veilguard
Section 9 is here.
I haven't played yet today. I have to take my immunocompromised ass into a world that doesn't give a shit about my life to get groceries. How do I know they don't care? They don't mask. It's as simple as that. If you care about immunocompromised people, people like me recovering from almost dying, pregnant people, old people, many children, people with immune affecting issues like long covid, depression, anxiety, fibromyalgia... goddess, the list goes on, if you cared? You'd mask. It's the number one way to help us survive. And no, us masking by ourselves doesn't work very well. Everyone has to.
Anyway. Yeah. Gotta risk my life for groceries because I can't afford delivery.
I was just sitting here, and I think I figured out some of the many issues that are bothering me about this game. The great big missing I've been trying to figure out.
They didn't make Veilguard for the adult gamers who have desperately wanted it for so long. They made it for children and teens.
Epler even outright said they'd changed things hoping to draw in a younger section of gamers. (In one of the first q&a sessions after the gameplay reveals.) I wonder if he bothered to do any market studies to see if that demographic would actually be interested?
I can only judge by my two gaming kids because I'm on media blackout while I finish this game. But no matter how much they simplified it for kids, they still have absolutely no interest in Dragon age. They're far more interested in indie games than anything a triple A studio puts out. Their opinions on Triple A studios are so low it's honestly ridiculous. They don't even understand why I love games put out by them.
So, the devs chose to remove things so that parents would be more likely to let their kid play what is still listed as a M level game (ESRB M for mature).
Ooooh, no. We can't have rogues picking locks and doing all the stuff rogues are supposed to be able to do. Why? Because that means kids will be delinquents doing the same! (The trust in the ability of older kids to understand the difference between a fantasy video game and real life is astounding, I tell you. /s) This is such a boomer thought process I'm shocked to see it, to be completely honest.)
Everyone is just so... nice. Not kind, that's different. But that sugary, false nice. None of the romanceables have anything tooooo controversial about them.
Blackwall Inquisition was a child murderer and lying about being a Grey Warden. Dorian was a spoiled, enslaving Tevinter rich boy (he did actually have a growth arc in Inquisition). Sera was a thief and a Red Jenny (people who worked against the entitled, rich nobility as needed to protect people without power). Varric (even though you can't romance him) was a thief, liar, cheater, and someone you wanted at your back in a fight because he fights dirty. Cassandra was bigoted, hide bound, and intolerant of any faiths other than Andrastianism. The Iron Bull was a failed Ben-Hassrath double agent. The ben-hassrath are a combination of spies, saboteurs, and assassins, among other things. Whatever was needed to defend the Qun. Cullen was a drug addict and such a horrible person in the previous two games it actually made me physically ill to try to romance him. Solas was, well, Solas. Who we all know had a lot of bad in his background. They've certainly hammered that point home in Veilguard. With a jackhammer. The only romance option in Inquisition that wasn’t dirty was Josey. And if you do Romance her, you find some dirt on her too.
I could say the same for almost every Dragon Age Romanceable in the entire damned series. They've mostly been not the greatest of people and when the writers were doing their jobs right, there were growth arcs for them that made them better people during the game. That's part of the fun of games with Romanceable characters. Picking out which broken bird fits your type of broken to romance. (And we're mostly all broken in some way.)
But all the romance options in Veilguard are... well, boring. They're nice, safe, decent people. And since most people have some darkness in them, it's probably not working for others as epically as it's not working for me.
If they're already nice, safe, decent people (even the fucking assassin!) then there's no room for growth. No room to learn that character and feel like your presence in their lives might give them a light to help them strive to be better people. They've truncated any potential for growth arcs for all of them. I'm a Romance author. When you're designing characters for Romance, they have to have a balance of flaws to good points. Otherwise they're just poorly designed characters with little potential to get hearts throbbing and knickers in a twist.
No wonder the romanceables aren't working for me. None of them have flaws big enough to make them well-rounded characters.
Moving on.
Have you noticed there's no blood splatter? You'll get a slowly creeping puddle around enemies, but somehow it never gets on the characters. I'll check if I have the energy to play after risking my life to get food. But I don't recall seeing a toggle for blood splatter in Veilguard. Like it or hate it, the blood splatter is very much a thing in games like these. They usually have an option to turn it off, but it's usually there. Especially in Dragon Age, blood splatter was a thing. A big thing. Hells, their logo was a blood splatter dragon for at least two games FFS. Edit. Confirmed there is no option anywhere I can find that lets us have blood splatter.
And honestly, having my characters coming out of hard fights looking like they've been through a meat grinder is part of the reason I enjoy games like these.
The choices for dialogue are also usually pretty 'nice'. The 'sarcastic' option usually isn't. The angry/strong one isn't either. It's all just... boring. And I'm into Act three now, so I'm thinking my hope of 'maybe the dialogue will get better' is probably an impossibility at this point.
The simplified plot points, the puerile storylines, the lack of dirt on the romanceables, the lack of growth arcs, the completely ridiculous cutting of 90% of the dark horror elements that made these games so good... we've lost all of that because they made this game for kids. And I highly doubt kids will be interested. So they've fucked over, and at least in my case, utterly pissed off the older gamers who have loved Dragon Age for so long, and very likely failed to attract younger gamers, too.
The problem with trying that, which I really think should've been obvious to somebody. Is that Dragon Age has never been a game designed for kids. It's always been bloody, often harsh, horrific, dark fantasy made for adults.
Games for younger people need to be designed for younger people from the first moment of creation. Or it just doesn't work. You technically can transfer some concepts from adult games into things for kids, but the result is invariably something as awful as Veilguard. And something bound to satisfy few people. The condescension toward younger folks in Veilguard is pretty bloody obvious. Something I've noticed kids hate? Being condescended to.
Congratulations on learning the lesson of knowing who your fucking market is.
It's crucial in any kind of content creation to know who you're making the thing for, and to not deviate from those genre expectations toooo much. Otherwise, you just have a mess of a disaster like Veilguard. They shot for two wildly dissimilar markets and failed both. Even the cartoony look of the art style is much more like a game for kids than anything like a dark fantasy game for adults.
And like... it's still listed as a mature rated game. So what, exactly, was the point of ruining Dragon Age like this? Many parents won't let their kids play M rated games regardless.
It's just so depressing. If they'd actually made this game for the people who had been praying for it for so long? It probably would have been phenomenal. As it stands, I'll be shocked if it doesn't sink Bioware. And if it doesn't, I'd think it because of bribery more than game quality.
I do have to say that you can decorate more than I thought. But you have to buy almost everything. And they're themes, so there's no intermixing possible. Like you could have Elven windows with Alamarri rugs and a Ferelden throne in Skyhold? All gifts from either people or cultures you'd helped, which tied it all together and connected it to the world... you can just change themes for the Lighthouse. It changes everything, and again, you have to buy almost everything. That really removes a lot of depth from the game.
People call all the collectibles and gifts etc. from the previous games 'filler'. But, frankly, that's a very uneducated opinion of what that 'filler' is supposed to do in fiction. The 'filler' (which is an actual technical term in writing fiction, and those things aren't filler) collectibles and quests gave depth to the games. It tied the world of THEDAS into the world of the player character. It's called world building in writing circles. And what confuses me is that I don't recall anyone having to do any of that. If all you wanted out of the previous games (especially Inquisition) was a fighting game, you could do that. None of the world building collection parts locked you out of any quests that I can recall. If you did enjoy deeper world building and collecting things, you could collect to your heart's content. There's none of that delicately intertwined, beautiful worldbuilding in Veilguard. It's stripped down to the very bare bones of mediocrity.
At heart, Veilguard is not a role-playing game. It's a fighting game. And not even a very well designed one. My not-a-fucking-rogue should never have aggro. That's not how this is supposed to work.
Why they felt going from a successful history of role-playing games to a stripped-down, poorly world built fighting game a good idea is just beyond me? Whoever made that decision honestly needs to be fired. And you will almost never see me say that. Jobs are too hard to find. But I will say it about Veilguard. The decisions made have ruined Veilguard in my honest, incredibly disappointed viewpoint.
They marketed this as a role-playing game. The expectation was for a role-playing game set in a richly detailed, deeply world built environment. Like most of the Dragon Age games have been. Especially Inquisition.
And we got a fighting game so stripped of world building that it's sad and just... boring.
Oh, heads up if you're disabled with any sort of disability that affects your hand eye coordination or ability to move your fingers quickly on a keyboard or controller. Don't buy this game. Even on the lowest setting with no death clicked on, you need a great deal of manual dexterity to use this crappy new fighting set up they've come up with. They definitely didn't think of physically disabled gamers at all in developing this. I'm just lucky my particular physical disabilities don't affect me that way. Though my hands are in agony from keeping my not-a-rogue out of the dragon on one side, stone wall on the other situation the fucked up aggro set up always puts me in.
They did bring gifts for companions back, which would thrill me if I actually had any desire to romance any of them. Which I honestly don't. And in games like these? It's often hard for me to pick which one. I often have to install a polyam mod so I can see the other romances because I'm usually so hot and bothered and just captivated by a Romanceable character or three that I won't be able to not romance them. Meaning I need the mod if I'm going to see the other romances.
I'm physically and mentally incapable of not romancing Astarion BG3. (I've tried!) Halsin gets me every time, too. Those are markers of excellent character development.
There's none of that in Veilguard.
Emmerich, and (as much as I hated his intro story, The Wigmaker,) Lucanis are the only slightly interesting characters to me.
Bellara is sweet and awkward, but they reduced her neurodivergent qualities so much it feels... off, to my neurodivergent ass. In the autistic people on tv way of off. (To date, there hasn't been much, if any, good rep of us on TV. It's all inspiration porn.) I don't feel seen in her. And I have quite a few traits she expresses. Whoever wrote her has my version of ADHD. But the way she's written, where she's constantly telling herself she's stupid or foolish or shouldn't do things? Those are markers of traumatized neurodivergence, not the ADHD itself they're highlighting. What that says is that, in her world, people have come down on her so hard for her differences, so often, that now she's mean to herself. ADHD kids aren't born like that. People make us like that. It's a sad representation of ADHD, not a celebratory or accepting one. It makes me feel like she, and me by extension, is to be pitied. Like someone like me, or Bellara, aren't worthy of respect, love, and trust. It's not a good feeling.
Neve is so suspicious and bitchy that I have no desire to even try to romance her. I want to shove Harding off a cliff.
Davrin is really suspiciously similar to Halsin BG3. Big, more blocky than usual for an elf, wants to do good, carves wood... but where Halsin really works (because of his deep character development and darkness) Davrin, while definitely hot and with an amazing voice... just falls flat.
Emmerich is a doll of prince charming manners and adorable fussiness. He's probably the character next to Lucanis who actually has the most darkness to him.
I really wanted to love Taash. And I like them a lot, but their 'you must choose only one' thing showed up really fucking early in the game. I didn't feel like I knew them yet, so they're just never going to work for my demisexual ass unless I actually replay this (unlikely?) with a polyam mod and basically plug my nose and close my eyes and leap into a relationship with them far earlier than I'm really comfy with.
So, there's some clarity for me on what's missing and why.
Genshin Impact has more draw for me as an adult gamer than Veilguard does. And that is absolutely a game targeted at teens and early twenties folks. It's also an incredibly well designed game with good world building, balanced fighting, and devs who know who their market is.
It's an old saw in content creation. But Know Your Market is a saw for a reason.
Section 10.2 here.
#dragon age veilguard#veilguard#da veilguard#dragonage#solas#dragon age#dragon age Veilguard Review#Veilguard spoilers#why did they make this game for kids?#I feel so betrayed
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Dont talk to me I'm trying to process the latest chapter it was a lot😭😭 everyone made me wanna cry. Jon so fiercely trying to protect his father (and brother), jon confronting the king, the rhea feels!! Him wanting to hate her but feeling guilty a part of him loves her and that redfort jon relished in her love bc he was so deprived of affection!! 😭😭😭 the cat and Robb parallels! Ghost feels!! The baelon and aemon shadow/ghosts were SO present this chapter. How jon is soooo much like daemon even in his internal thoughts 😭😭😭 jon noticing the similarities between viserys and daemon and how viserys probably took care of daemon when they were younger and they probably got it from THEIR dad! Uwah gonna cry. And then you've got daemon seeing rhaegar die in aemon's place and that mixing in with his canon death broooooo that's a lot. Daemon scaring and hurting rhaegar 😭😭😭😭 dude ik he's thinking about aerys rn😭😭😭😭😭 and poor caraxes something is messing with their rider and interfering with their bond but he cannot do anything about ittttt😭😭😭
There was so much cute moments at the start of the chap with jon and rhaegar playing detectives and debriefing and then rhaegar excitedly sharing his dragon discoveries with their dad and their dad reading to them in HV (and then translating after for jon cute) ik he was relishing being able to have a story time with his kids🥺🥺🥺
Anyways this chapter made me feel a lot. This is all so very convoluted I hope it makes sense rnwjsjw I just love it sm
This chapter sure was A Lot™️, wasn't it? I made sure to throw in the sweet moments at the start to offset (enhance?) some of those punches later.
The Rhea feels honestly caught me by surprise when I was writing the Jon+Viserys scene. They sort of just--bubbled up to the surface. Jon's been trying to suppress Jon Redfort's emotions/memories for a while now, and it's hard when so many frightening/painful/awful things have happened to both of them. And Jon is particularly attuned to a child being treated differently/poorly by a mother figure, except he's on the other end of it this time, so there's that added complexity of seeing himself in Raymar, both the loved and the unloved, that he has to deal with.
(Also my heart was breaking in two for little Raymar, who wanted so desperately to love and be loved by Rhea in return. It's not that she didn't, it's that it was much more difficult for her, and when you're a twin, that inequality is so incredibly obvious. It hurts and they had no Ned to give them at least one source of parental affection.)
And then the rest of the breakfast scene...I think Viserys kept going back and forth between seeing Baelon and Daemon in Jon, though more of Baelon in the end, with Jon laying it out so adamantly what his duty as a brother was. And of course we got the inevitable Viserys-Daemon friction in those moments when Jon most reminded him of Daemon. It's a shame that Jon's tough love isn't really what Viserys needs to mend things with Daemon, because the problem isn't that Viserys doesn't love Daemon (though him not protecting his own brother, especially where Otto's insinuations are concerned, is certainly a flaw), it's that he's shit at expressing it and reluctant to trust Daemon enough to explain things.
(It's hard to explain in narrative format where Jon was sitting/where Daemon always sits, but it's basically at the end/"head" of the table, while Viserys usually sits at the end of the side facing the window. And that detail killed me a little when I realized it, because that's where I've always written Daemon sitting in his scenes there with Viserys, and it's so obvious why. Viserys seats him in an inverted version of that during their supper the first night in King's Landing, with Viserys at the head and Daemon to his side. It's the closest Daemon can get to being his brother's Hand.)
...I'm realizing as I'm writing this that I should probably be throwing this in the DVD commentary, but oh well, I can copy-pasta it there later.
I've been calling the Daemon-trance scene a low-grade horror scene for Rhaegar, because imagine that from his POV, especially given his history with Aerys. He's operating at maximum Aerys-mode for a while, reading Daemon at speeds enviable by modern CPUs so that he can figure out how to defuse the situation / "fix" him before any (unintentional) harm is done. And the parallels with Aerys's paranoia is incredibly uncomfortable, even if he understands that Daemon is suffering under an outside influence.
Meanwhile, Caraxes is all: GET YOUR FILTHY HANDS OFF HIM, wishing he could pick Daemon up and cuddle him until the sorcerer scent is completely gone. (He's had to deal with his own version of that before, of having his bond with Daemon tampered with, and it's even more upsetting from the other side!)
And you made perfect sense! There was just so much to process.
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To treat Jack like a helpless woobie take Jack seriously as a character, you have to ~*consider*~ the harm Dean did to him! Dean was forced into looking after Jack in a parental way despite his feelings about it would be a terrible parent, just look at how he treated Jack!
I'm not saying Dean doesn't have issues, because ... oh yeah. However? Come the actual fuck on with this harmless abused baby woobie Jack bullshit.
Starting from the bottom, oh noes, Dean was "a terrible parent" to the creature he thought he was going to have to be the one to kill. Especially because Sam was too caught up in his own issues of desperately needing to believe Jack could be good despite Lucifer (so he could believe he was good despite Azazel), and fixated on an opportunity to use his powers to get Mary back. Neither of which are exactly parent of the year material either, sorry. No shit! It was only as they leaned harder and harder into the absurdly fluffly two men and a nougat baby premise (where they even went so far as to give him magical consumption ffs) that it even makes sense to describe Dean's role towards Jack as "parental", because initially he was watching the dangerous monster Sam brought home in the hopes he'd somehow manage to protect both of them and everyone else from an unpredictable, invulnerable supernatural creature more powerful than Lucifer. Whether or not Dean's approach was a good way to treat a potentially explosive nephilim bomb is a whole other conversation, because asserting Dean would be a terrible parent because of that? Okay, sure, don't ask him to act like a parent to a supernatural threat he has no idea how to neutralize that could easily destroy the universe, that's clearly a bad idea, yes. 🙄
Again, when Jack was introduced, the Winchesters were literally concerned he was an unkillable monster and might destroy the universe - possibly on purpose, possibly on accident. Not just because he was Lucifer's son, not just because he was a nephilim, but because he literally almost did when tricked by fried chicken suit. When I consider Jack as a character and try to take him seriously, that includes remembering he's an unreasonably powerful supernatural creature who has issues controlling both his powers and his emotions, that starts out ignorant as a post and gullible as shit. Frankly, IMO, that doesn't improve much as the show goes on. The narrative itself swung wildly from treating Jack like a literal baby to a quasi-adult person to a cosmically powerful supernatural threat. On the whim of the script-of-the-week with little to no consistency. Then, after literally joking how absurd it would be to make an idiot woobie baby creature that didn't know shit Chuck's replacement, they went ahead and made him the new God because ... Dabbernatural, woo!
So yeah, I guess it's not like I actually can take Dabb's pet teenage stu seriously anyway. Let alone get palpitations over Dean not immediately treating poor wittle Jackie-poo like his child but instead the dangerous supernatural creature he was actually set up as when Sam wanted to adopt him for his own purposes.
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