#desist

[whimsiquix]

Hilarious tidbit of the day, that time Draupadi called Arjun the best of the Pandavas to the other Pandavas:

‘In particular, Panchali remembered the husband who was in the middle, the brave one who was absent. She told the foremost of the Pandavas, “In the absence of the two-armed Arjuna, the equal of the many-armed Arjuna and the best of the Pandavas, this forest seems cheerless to me. Wherever I look, the earth seems to be empty to me. This forest, with its many marvels and blossoming trees, no longer seems to be attractive in Savyasachi’s absence. This Kamyaka is as blue as monsoon clouds and is frequented by elephants in rut. But without Pundarikaksha, it has no charm. The twang of his bow is like the roar of the thunder. O king! I remember Savyasachi and without him, I cannot find any peace of mind.”

- BORI 376(79)

Side note: Pundarikaksha means: ‘The Lotus-Eyed-One’. 🪷 Something about Draupadi frequently describing how beautiful she finds Arjun absolutely breaks my mind actually.

[she-is-ovarit]

Detransitioner news

I have been thinking about detransitioners lately and wanted to compile articles I have been seeing. This will be a longer post and reblogged for part II as I hope to copy and paste brief portions of the articles under each headline.

Law firm for detransitioners opens in Dallas

In all of the controversy around gender transition, there is one group that is persistently marginalized by both the right and left. They are known as detransitioners — people who decide that they want to return to their birth gender, often after receiving years of interventional care, including surgery, to treat their gender dysphoria. Now, the nation’s first law firm focused solely on representing these patients — many of whom feel abused by a medical system that encouraged their treatment — has opened its doors in Dallas. It could forever change how hospitals and doctors approach what’s known as gender-affirming care.

Archive link

Fenway Community Health Center in Boston, the largest provider of transgender medicine in New England and one of the leading institutions of its kind in the United States, was named a defendant in a lawsuit filed last month. The plaintiff, a gay man who goes by the alias Shape Shifter, argues that by approving him for hormones and surgeries, Fenway Health subjected him to “gay conversion” practices, in violation of his civil rights. Carlan v. Fenway Community Health Center is the first lawsuit in the United States to argue that “gender-affirming care” can be a form of anti-gay discrimination. The case underscores an important clinical reality: gender dysphoria has multiple developmental pathways, and many who experience it will turn out to be gay. Even the Endocrine Society concedes that many of the youth who outgrow their dysphoria by adolescence later identify as gay or bisexual. Decades of research confirm as much. Gender clinicians in the U.K. used to have a “dark joke . . . that there would be no gay people left at the rate [the Gender Identity Development Service] was going,” former BBC journalist Hannah Barnes reported. Rather than help young gay people to accept their bodies and their sexuality, what if “gender-affirming” clinicians are putting them on a pathway to irreversible harm?

Due partly to Shape’s lifelong difficulty in accepting himself as gay, his lawyers are not taking the usual approach to detransition litigation. Rather than state a straightforward claim of medical malpractice or fraud, they allege that Fenway Health has violated Section 1557 of the Affordable Care Act (ACA), which bans discrimination “on the basis of sex” in health care. In 2020, the Supreme Court ruled in Bostock v. Clayton County that “discrimination because of . . . sex” includes discrimination based on homosexuality. Citing this and other precedents, Shape’s lawyers argue that federal law affords distinct protections to gay men and lesbians—upon which clinics that operate with a transgender bias are trampling. Shape grew up in a Muslim country in Eastern Europe that he describes in an interview as “very traditional” and “homophobic.” His parents disapproved of his effeminate demeanor and interests as a child. They wouldn’t let him play with dolls, and his mother, he says, made him do stretches so that he would grow taller and appear more masculine. At 11, Shape had his first of several sexual encounters with older men. “I was definitely groomed,” he recounts. Shape proceeded to develop a pattern of risky sexual behavior, according to his legal complaint. He told his medical team at Fenway Health about his childhood sexual experiences, calling them “consensual.” The Fenway providers never challenged him on this interpretation, he alleges. They never suggested that he might have experienced sexual trauma or, say, explored how these events might have shaped his feelings of dissociation. (The irony is that Fenway Health describes its model of care as “trauma-informed.”)

Archive link

Ontario detransitioner who had breasts and womb removed sues doctors

An Ontario detransitioning woman who had her breasts and womb removed to change her gender to male is suing medical and health practitioners for failing to consider other treatments during her mental health crisis before ushering her on an irreversible journey she regrets. Michelle Zacchigna, 34, of Orillia, Ont., north of Toronto, names eight health professionals, including doctors, psychologists, a psychotherapist and a counsellor in a lawsuit filed in Ottawa. None of the defendants, who work or worked at various clinics and institutions in southern Ontario, responded to requests for comment on the lawsuit prior to deadline. Four of the defendants have filed notices of intent to defend against the suit in Ontario Superior Court, but no statements of defense have been filed. None of the claims have been tested in court. Zacchigna said she faces an uphill battle in her lawsuit. “I’ve been under the impression that all medical malpractice suits are challenging. Doctors win the majority of cases in Canada,” she told National Post. “It’s very much a David vs. Goliath undertaking.” In her statement of claim filed in court in November, Zacchigna says she had difficulty forming relationships with classmates in elementary school and was often bullied. By the time she was 11, she engaged in self-harming behaviour, including cutting her arm with a knife. This continued into early adulthood. When she was 20, she tried to kill herself and she was referred by her family doctor for psychotherapy, where she was treated for social anxiety and clinical depression. She remained unhappy and depressed, and her mental health decline led to her dropping out of university, according to her claim. About a year into therapy, she engaged with an online community around gender nonconformity. “Michelle came to believe that her biological sex of female did not match her true gender identity of male,” her claim says. “She further came to believe that this mismatch between her biological sex and gender identity was causing her feelings of depression, self-harming behaviour and unease in her body, a mental health condition commonly known as gender dysphoria,” her claim states. This was the first time Zacchigna felt she was born in the wrong body, and she had not previously identified as male, her claim says. “However, as a result of what she read on the internet, she became convinced that she was a transgender man, and that once she embraced this new identity, her depression would subside.” Zacchigna started attending a support group in Toronto for people considering gender transition. A counsellor there told her of opportunities to proceed through a medical transition, her claim says. Zacchigna was invited to apply for medical intervention in 2010. The counsellor wrote a recommendation letter outlining a medical history that didn’t fully match her real past, the claim says. The counsellor didn’t recommend any alternatives, or seek confirmation of Zacchigna’s own diagnosis of gender dysphoria. Her regular therapist also wrote a recommendation for transition treatment, saying Zacchigna was an “ideal candidate for hormone therapy,” even though the therapist had no previous transgender clients, according to the claim.

Part II incoming.

[blueraspberrycoke]

Best college research is in USA cost vs degree use which has a list of schools, this gives you the best loan for degree cost of the degree is the goal. Look at that and the subject then online at the best cross matches. Unless you want a social experience mostly then whatever vibes. Listen you know anti-trans bigotry like in your about has NO ethical point in feminism, it's just bigotry.

Thank you for the advice on college :)

I'm not a bigot. I'm not anti-trans. I don't think trans people are inherently evil. But I do not believe you can change your biological sex. I do not believe allowing trans women into women's sports, changing rooms, sexualities (lesbians being pressured to date trans women), etc. is good for women and girls. It's not just a belief I have, it's factually proven to be dangerous to put TW in women's prisons (1, 2, 3, 4, 5) and in bathrooms (1, 2, 3, 4, 5 [5 is written by a trans woman]).

I'm not saying I hate trans people or that I don't trust them or that teens/children who identify as transgender are "broken" or "wrong" like people have said I do. I think we have manipulated an entire generation of lesbians and homosexual boys (though not all trans-identified people are homosexual/bisexual) into believing they have to be the opposite sex. We've lied to dysphoric teens and told them they're going to die if they don't recieve gender-affirming care (see all the posts on the protecttranskids, transgenocide, transrights etc. hashtags).

This is also evident in that anytime you question someone who says trans people are experiencing a genocide, especially a younger person (like a teenager who gets all their information from Instagram and TikTok) they actually can't come up with a single example. Even when they bring up the so-called "anti-trans legislature" being passed in the United States, they can't name any specific bans, because that actually does not exist. What I linked for you is HB1276, which, if you read it, allows minors who underwent sexual reassignment surgery to sue their doctors up to 30 years after they turn 18 for malpractice if they regret surgery. Trans Legislation Tracker labels this an "anti-trans" bill.

They have reason to regret it, too. Lupron, the drug administered in FtM transition to dysphoric females, has painful and sometimes deadly side effects that gender-affirming medical clinics will not disclose with you in full. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

Also, a disproportionate amount of FtM females are autistic, homosexual, and depressed. I care especially about these women because I'm eighteen, autistic, and a lesbian, so I really resonate with their pain and struggle. I'm not disgusted by transgender individuals and I'm not angry with them. I feel terrible for them. And I want to help.

What I think we have in the world now is an extreme lack of education. It's harming girls and women my age, when there are more affordable and better options. We've known for a long time doctors will push medicines that don't work/shouldn't be as expensive as they are in order to make money (I'm talking about things like selling insulin for $500 a vial. I'm not talking about things like vaccines.).

If you want to change your name and use other pronouns, cool, fine, whatever. I don't care what you do with your life, your money, and your time. But don't call yourself male or female when you're not. See my pinned post for why doing so harms women and men.

Transgenderism is motivated by misogyny. Go to any of the subreddits created for TW (r/Egg_irl, r/MtF, r/transgender [though that one contains trans men also]) and you'll see in every "How I knew I was trans" post that these people consider being female synonymous with being feminine, and it isn't. I'm not feminine. Does that make me a man? No. It just makes me a nonfeminine woman.

I'm not denying the existence of gender dysphoria. Many of my mutuals are desisted females who still struggle with it. But hormone therapy/SRS (sexual reassignment surgery) are very clearly not the answer. I hope this helps you understand my position better. I also hope I've not come across as condescending or patronizing in any way.

[sad--fem]

I need more detrans people to follow. detransitioned, desisted, or questioning females reblog or reply to this post

[papaziggy-devblog]

YABOI COMMERE I JUST WANNA TALK I SWEAR

[woman-for-women]

hii! i was wondering if there was anywhere I could message you privately? i’m a 14 year old girl who socially IDed as FtM for 5 years but now want to detransition and I don’t know where to go or where to start. xx

Hi! Firstly, you can message me, but if that's something that makes you uncomfortable, I can try to point you to resources right here! Feel free to send other asks :)

Talk to a trusted adult in your life. It could be a parent, an aunt/uncle, a teacher, or an older sibling. The adults in your life probably want the best for your health and happiness. It's great if you reach out to me, but at the end of the day, the adults in your life know you the best and would probably want you to talk to them first before a stranger on the internet. I'm guessing your parents will probably be open to hearing what you have to say.

Contact your doctor or a local gender clinic and ask if they can point you towards detransitioning resources.

Search online and see if there are any detransition support groups near you (unlikely this will pan out, but it's worth a try). If you happen to know anyone who has detransitioned, you can also reach out to them.

If you are able to, please look into counseling. If you are dysphoric, you can ask for a counselor that will help you explore your discomfort with your body/gender roles and reconcile your relationship with your body. I’d avoid any therapists who advertise themselves as LGBTQIA2S+ friendly: they may be well meaning, but their primary method of treatment for dysphoria will likely be transition. Therapists and other mental health professionals tend to have bios where they list their background and what they specialize in: I'd suggest looking for a therapist who is female, and possibly someone who is comfortable gender non-conforming (someone who doesn't see being unhappy with gender roles or gender non-conforming as being the same as being trans). I went to a counselor who was an older lesbian. You can also send an email to Gender Exploratory Therapy Association (GETA) to see if they can match you with a therapist.

You can journal how you feel. It doesn't need to be fancy (it can be a notes page on your phone or some binder paper, but if journaling with markers and stickers and washi tape helps, you can do that too). Ask yourself what made you feel like you weren't or couldn't be a woman/girl? What does the thought of detransitioning make you feel? It can just be how you feel in general. If you're comfortable, you can also share your journal with a trusted adult or counselor. Or, it can just be for your eyes only.

Work on improving your integrity and comfort with your body. It helps you feel wonderful feelings, taste your favorite foods, see beautiful things... your body is not trying to hurt you or work against you. For example, your body is not menstruating because it is "punishing" you for not being pregnant (this is something I heard a lot growing up). Menstruation is just something female bodies do. It's vital to regulating your hormonal health, bone density, and weight. While yes, you can get pregnant and be a parent if you choose to as an adult, your body is not telling you to do anything. Your bodily functions are not a mandate. You exist for you!

Try to avoid seeing your body as a problem, or as fractured parts you want to fix: your body is just your body. Don't think of your body as a decorative object you need to change to please anyone. Your body exists for you and (most importantly) your body is you. Treating your body well is part of treating yourself well.

To improve your relationship with your body, I would recommend picking a sport or physical activity. Do something you like that makes you comfortable! If wearing a swimsuit fills you with dread, wear a more modest one or don't pick swimming. It can be as simple as walking, stretching, or yoga in your room. The point of a physical activity is not just to keep in shape, but to feel how your body is capable of doing whatever you want it to. Your body doesn't have to look a certain way for that.

Your image of your body and your comfort with being female might also improve if you take a social media break. I know it can be hard, but try to commit to a short break (a week, a month). Use this time to read, listen to music, draw, relax, exercise... whatever will keep you happy and healthy. Social media is saturated with images of sexualized, objectified, and impossibly thin women. It can be stressful to feel like you don't "measure up" to what the Internet tells you a woman is supposed to be. Take this time to remind yourself that you don't need to imitate these people to be happy.

I would also recommend you unfollow any social media accounts that make you feel bad about your body or talk about transitioning and gender all the time (you can always refollow later). Focus on how you feel about your body and yourself, not what other people promote.

What or how you decide to change socially, who you tell, or how you say it is up to you. You don't need to disclose why you're detransitioning either. You can just tell people you've decided it wasn't for you or that you'd like to go by your old name/pronouns. Don't let anyone, especially other transitioned peers, pressure you into doing or revealing anything you don't want to. If you have a friend group of trans peers your age, don't let them make you feel bad! You have the right to do what's best for you. If you have friends that aren't supportive of you doing what's best for you, it might be best to look for a new friend group.

If you've been happiest dressing in "boy" clothes or doing certain "boy" activities, none of that has to change when you detransition! Detransitioning should be about accepting that your natal biological sex is female. Being female is a neutral fact, like being brunette or being 167 cm. Being female has no bearing on what you can do, who you can love, what professions, hobbies, or interests you have... that's all gender. You don't have to change how you dress, think, feel, act, talk, etc. None of these things can disqualify you from being a woman or girl. Just be yourself and know there's no wrong way to be female.

Being a woman or girl can be scary. Menstruation sucks, sexual harassment sucks, sexism sucks. But there's light at the end of the tunnel, and that's other women and girls! Reach out to them. They are your lifeline. Build friendships. There are other women and girls just like you. You are never alone.

On that note, having positive female role models and consuming books/TV shows/movies/music by and about women can help you feel better about detransitioning and reconciling with being female.

Don't discount the wisdom of older women! They're not nags, shrews, or "Karens". They're female, too. Many of them have likely felt what you feel.

Detransitioning doesn't mean you need to feel a certain type of way on gender or trans issues. Don't let radical feminists, conservatives, or trans-rights activists bully you into saying or doing what suits their narrative. It's your life, so do what's right for you!

Lastly, here are some resources I would recommend, both about transition and detransition:

A Booklet on Gender Detransition

The risks of binding

Testosterone use and pelvic health

Maybe this is silly, but this comic helped me feel a lot better when I first saw it.

Cosmic Uterus by Ida Neverdahl

Edit: I added some things to the list. Before I forget — the prevailing narrative told to dysphoric and trans-identifying teens is that you need to transition, you need to go on hormones, you need to do xyz or you will die. This is not true. Most dysphoric youth who do not medically transition end up as happy, alive adults. (If you are having suicidal thoughts, please tell a trusted adult or call a hotline). So I’m going to tell you instead what I was told, and what other lesbian, gay, and bisexual kids were told growing up: it gets better. I promise it does. You are so brave. You are going to be okay <3

[lesbianlenses]

nevertheless she desisted

[tiredfemininity]

I'm surprised how little I see detrans people who find comfort in religion.

I didn't detransition because of my faith, but to me, my femininity is something I couldn't find comfort in without my faith. When I had just detransitioned, I saw myself falling back into the teenage desire of oversexualising myself in my femininity.

That's when I discovered how much I love modesty.

I covered my hair, and my femininity became about autonomy and choice.

I put on a long skirt, and my femininity became about being incognito.

Nobody needs to know what my hair and body looks like.

Religious modesty saved me from oversexualising myself for the male gaze as an attempt to seek validation in my newly found role as a woman.

[boygirldykething]

just until it's safe.

[Image ID:

A gray figure on a solid-colour bright red background. They have long hair and bangs, what would be considered a feminine appearance. Their eyes are hidden by their bangs and the downward angle of their head obscures their mouth, so no emotion or personality can be determined from their face. They're curled up, knees pulled up and arms crossed loosely across their chest, like they're sheltering something with their body. Underneath their arms, fully visible as though their arms were transparent, is a tiny figure coloured like the trans flag. He has short hair, and is curled up in a similar way to the gray figure, knees pulled to his chest, but he seems more tense than protective. He's partially hiding his face in his hands, his eyes are wide, and he's shaking.

End ID]

[sensoryled]

you can’t fight ree, they’re still in a wheelchair! what the hell is wrong with you??

[she-is-ovarit]

Case Overview

The Dhillon Law Group and LiMandri & Jonna LLP, in conjunction with the Center for American Liberty, sent a letter of intent to sue to the Permanente Medical Group, Kaiser Foundation Health Plan & Kaiser Foundation Hospitals who performed, supervised, and/or advised transgender hormone therapy and surgical intervention for Chloe Cole when she was between 13-17 years old.

“My teenage life has been the culmination of excruciating pain, regret, and most importantly injustice,” Cole said. “I have been emotionally and physically damaged and stunted by so-called medical professionals in my most important developmental period. I was butchered by an institution that we trust more than anything else in our lives. What is worse is that I am not alone in my pain. I will see to the fact that the blood and tears of detransitioners like myself will not lay waste. It is impossible for me to recoup what I have lost, but I will insure no children will be harmed at the hands of these liars and mutilators.”

“The medical system shouldn’t dictate the future of young children’s lives. Through this legal action, the ‘professionals’ involved will be held accountable for their despicable plot to mutilate children and financially benefit from it,” said Center for American Liberty’s CEO, Harmeet Dhillon (@pnjaban). “We will break the cycle of them breaking our children before it’s too late.”

Background: Chloe is a biological female who suffered from a perceived psychological issue “gender dysphoria” beginning at 9-years-old. Under Defendants’ advice and supervision, between 13-17 years-old, Chole underwent harmful transgender treatment, specifically, off-label puberty blockers, cross-sex hormone treatment, and a double mastectomy.

Throughout Chloe’s medical experience in California, the facilities and institutions actively promoted, encouraged, and advertised the availability of these treatments. Chloe and her parents were not informed of the option for psychiatric treatment or an approach that attempted to treat the underlying psychological conditions to bring about a mental state congruent with Chloe’s biological sex.

Defendants also falsely informed Chloe and her parents that Chloe was at a high risk for suicide, unless she socially and medically transitioned to appear more like a male. Chloe has been informed by her parents that Defendants even gave them the ultimatum: “would you rather have a dead daughter or a live son?”

Chloe will be seeking punitive damages based on the evidence of malice, oppression and fraud.

The website is asking people to reach out to them to fill out a form if you've had similar experiences.

[jules-hoard-of-stuff]

Your partner asking to look through your phone is a red flag, period

"i let my friends/partner go through my phone" people baffle me like i don't even have anything worth hiding on mine and id still turn it into shrapnel before i let anyone browse through it. id prefer it be a fine metallic mist than let anyone see the recipe tabs i have open. it's my right and my right alone to know what strange games i downloaded from janky yet intriguing ads

[hiphopraisedmetheblog]

Wack 100 Accuses Drake Of Sending Kendrick Lamar Cease And Desist Over Super Bowl Performance

The Allegations Surrounding Drake and Kendrick Lamar’s Super Bowl Performance In the complex world of hip-hop rivalries, few disputes have captured public attention quite like that between Drake and Kendrick Lamar. This ongoing feud reached new heights with recent allegations made by Wack 100, claiming that Drake sent Kendrick a cease and desist over his upcoming Super Bowl Halftime Show…

[tiredfemininity]

I think it (finding religion during detransition) is both common and something to take caution in. Many people will use it to completely reverse but have the same unhealthy obsession with religion, or modesty, or gender conformity that they had with transition. It is very common for us to latch onto new, exploitative, or obsessive ventures to replace the trans politics/community.

I definitely see your point. I know that to me, my Muslim identity is really important, but I have been taking time to indulge my lost hobbies, too - fashion, literature, poetry, even colour guard.

Judaism and Islam are both ways of living, not just religions. The practice happens at home, work, coffee shops, not only in a place of worship, so I don't know whether it's better or worse when it comes to getting "consumed" by the faith.

[daddy-davies]

Get a life bournemuff

[tiredfemininity]

Oh my God, yes.

But please please please please please don't villainise and ostracise the women who do choose to be gender conforming to cope with the immense levels of dysphoria that comes with detransitioning.

detransition doesn't mean becoming gender conforming. detransitioned women don't have to buy a new wardrobe, start "acting" feminine, voice train, get breast implants or estrogen HRT, or anything else that's often expected of us. you don't have to do anything except accept your body for what it is and begin to move through life without trying to change yourself.