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sweetlittlevampire · 4 years

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Rima’s Wangxian Fic Rec

So I’ve compiled these specifically for @inessencedevided , but hey, we’re all here to spread the love, so please, share and reshare to your heart’s content! :D

I’ll start with “Personal Favourites” - there are many more that I would consider a Personal Favourite, but I’ve picked those specifically because I thought you’d enjoy them. AU fics will also be included, because there are some real gems out there, and some still take place in canon universe, but with a twist, so...yeah.

Main pairing is Wangxian; I somehow don’t tend to read much else. ^^;

This thing is going to be loooong, so please find everything under the Read More. And feel free to let me know if a link doesn’t work so I can fix it.

Personal Favourites

爱不释手; never let me go by yiqie

Rating: Explicit

Warning: Graphic Depictions Of Violence

Length: 68713 words

Chapters: 1

Status: Completed

Author’s summary: “Wei Wuxian has certainly hoped so ardently in his two lifetimes, for so many different things, in so many different ways, that he could have summoned the demon to his front door with his bare hands. His eyes wander to Lan Zhan, settle on the back of his head, the blue-black curtain of his hair. Oh, how he has hoped.”

A case fic! And one of my personal all-time favourites as well! It is so well-crafted, with an engaging and captivating plot, a TON of OCs who actually do contribute to the story, and a few scenes that are so beautiful I could weep. Got hyped up on twitter, and rightfully so. It’s a delight to read.

Rabbit Heart by Suaine

Rating: Mature

Warning: N/A

Length: 56590 words in total

Chapters: 6

Status: Completed

Author’s summary: “ Wei Wuxian walks his lonely road, but he’s not going to leave Lan Wangji entirely alone. That would be boring. “

Another case fic! Set after the show’s ending, Wei Wuxian goes his way, but leaves the paper man behind to keep Lan Wangji company. I loved this one to pieces - it has intriguing subplots and will make your heart melt several times.

Those are actually thonly two case fics I’ve read so far, but for more, be sure to visit @wangxianfics ‘s Case Fic section. It has many more, and I am planning on reading several of them.

the earth remembered me by remux

Rating: Teen and Up Audiences

Warning: N/A

Length: 30321 words so far

Chapters: 2 out of scheduled 4

Status: Ongoing

Author’s Summary: “All around him, summer throbs like a heartbeat, undeniably alive. Wounds begin to heal. And Wei Wuxian, with sweat on his brow, feels ripe. Wei Wuxian, with his hands deep in the soil and mud between his toes, remembers something simple and primitive and utterly transformative: It feels good to make things grow. OR: Wei Wuxian’s travel guide to finding your place in the world.”

This fic changed me. Like, literally. It’s still ongoing, but I don’t even care. It’s not a case fic, but I’m 100% sure you’ll love it. It’s pure poetry and catharsis, and it hurts so much, but it’s so necessary. I think I cried several times while reading each of the chapters, and I’m eagerly but patiently awaiting the next one. It follows Wei Wuxian’s journey after he leaves the Cloud Recesses in episode 50 and tells the story of what he does and experiences before he returns back to Lan Wangji. So it’s absically only Wei Wuxian, Lil’ Apple, and the people they meet along his way.

Begotten by ecorie

Rating: General Audiences

Warning: N/A

Length: 37279 words

Chapters: 6

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: “He’s mine.” He echoed what had once been teasingly said in jest, and added, “This is my son.” Against all odds and without a choice, Lan Zhan brings A-Yuan back to Cloud Recesses. Xichen keeps his brother’s secrets, and shields the child when Lan Zhan could not.“

Also known as: Filling in the blanks with everything that happened in those 13 years. I loved this one. Wangji = Best Dad, Sizhui = Best Son.

Canon Universe

(not necessarily canon compliant though)

the soft animal by cafecliche

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warning: N/A

Length: 5046 words

Chapters: 1

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: “You don’t think that’s strange?” he says. His voice, his new voice, is familiar now. But sometimes it almost startles him, hearing it come from his mouth. “It’s been nine months. I’ve used them almost every day. I should know how long these legs are.” (Or: Wei Wuxian has a plan to train Mo Xuanyu’s body. The results aren’t quite what he expects.)“

A very interesting take on Wei Wuxian, and how he comes to terms with his new body. Something I had not seen previously explored, and I really loved how the author handled it.

Come let me love you (Come love me again) by obsessivereader

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warning: N/A

Length: 9105 words

Chapters: 1

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: “The notes from the dizi cut off as Wei Ying goes absolutely still. Over the quiet whisper of the wind through grass, Lan Wangji can hear the rapid beat of his own heart. Wei Ying's hands drop to his side slowly, so slowly, as though time has slowed down for both of them. He turns, a look almost of fear on his face. And then...And then, Wei Ying smiles—slow and beautiful and warm and relieved as though Lan Wangji standing before him is a treasured dream fulfilled. "Lan Zhan," he breathes.“

A “What happens after the end of the last episode?”-fic. I’m kind of a sucker for those. This one is very sweet and tender; I absolutely loved the interactions between Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian, and the gentleness of it all. I also adore the song it’s been titled after (”Annie’s Song” by John Denver, if you’re curious).

Death of a Ghost by Gotcocomilk

Rating: Explicit

Warning: N/A

Length: 107397 words in total

Chapters: 30

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: “There was a ghost that haunted the decks of Lotus Pier, it was said. If you stepped across the wooden planks at night, walked along the endless docks and flying purple banners, he would appear. He was always in darkest black, dressed as specter and shadow. In the emptiness where a face should be was a thick fog, features washed away and leaving behind only glimmering red eyes. He looked ferocious as a ghoul, it was said. Jin Ling thought he looked sad.“

Full disclosure - I am five chapters into this thing, and I am already recommending it, I am that intrigued. There is some serious Yunmeng Bros stuff in there which I think you are going to love, and the interactions between said ghost and Jin Ling are - aaaah! Cannot wait to continue!

wrap your name tight around my ribs by sasukepositive

Rating: General Audiences

Warning: N/A

Length: 8728 words

Chapters: 1

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: “ In true Wei Ying fashion, his return comes with a dose of mischief. “

Another “What happens after the end of the last episode?”-fic, with a good dose of Wangxian family feels. In fact. the whole thing is a huge chunk of feels. A very soft, delicate, and sweet fic, which will leave you feeling warm and fuzzy.

please linger by sasukepositive

Rating: General Audiences

Warning: N/A

Length: 5636 words

Chapters: 1

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: “ When A-Yuan begins crying, Lan Wangji knows it makes sense. He understands that crying will not harm him — he logically knows that. However, A-Yuan’s little face turns red so quickly that it leaves Lan Wangji a little panicked.“Ah,” he begins helplessly, stepping forward in an attempt at — something. He doesn’t know what. “It’s okay.” or: sometimes the man you love assures you that his mysteriously acquired child will nap until he gets back from shopping. for sure. “

If you liked the Dad Date Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian had with A-Yuan in Yiling, then you’ll love this one. It’s a fill-the-gaps fic in which Lan Wangji returns to Yiling several times to see Wei Wuxian and A-Yuan. Still follows canon events though, hence the bittersweet ending, but it is still so so lovely.

I hope that you will come and meet me by feyburner

Rating: Mature

Warning: N/A

Length: 28385 words

Chapters: 1

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: “ The second time Lan Zhan said Wei Ying, come back, Wei Wuxian did. “

Another one of tehse post-show-canon fics. I love everything feyburner writes, and this was the first fic of theirs I came across. I love the feeloings described in it, and just how sweet it is. One of those fics in which the way the mature part is executed just makes the whole thing even sweeter.

Alternate Universe

(but sometimes within the canon universe?)

Merman Lan Wangji!AU by FleetofShippyShips ( @fleetofshippyships here on tumblr)

- which is a series of connected fics, and not one long fic with chapters, hence why the formatting is different here. 5 entries so far; ungoing. Teen And Up Audiences

...which is definetely a personal favourite of mine, - you might have noticed, since I’ve been drawing a ton for this particular AU. But since I don’t know if yu’re into merfolk!AUs I didn’t list it up there with the personal favourites.

It is following canon so far, only that Lan Wangji is, as the title suggests, a merman - with secrets.

I adore the atmosphere of this series so much, and the way Zoe writes it is just so beautiful. It’s a story in which I could live, and if you’re in for the ride, I can assure you that there will be many surprises to come.

Welcome to Gusu by perkynurples ( @bilboo here on tumblr)

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warning: N/A

Length: 30853 words so far

Chapters: 5 so far

Status: Ongoing

Author’s Summary: “ Deep in the lush forests of Gusu hides an aging resort that hosts dozens of children every summer for an unforgettable couple of weeks. It’s where Lan Wangji grew up alongside Wei Wuxian, and when his childhood friend (for the lack of a better term) surprisingly returns years later in the position of Senior Counsellor, seemingly hell bent on causing the same kind of mischief that got him kicked out of Gusu in the first place, but also taller, broader and tanner than ever before, Lan Wangji knows he’s In Trouble. Or, this fic has it all: longing looks over campfires, found family dynamics, ill-timed skinny dipping, teenagers inappropriately shipping their counsellors, LAKE MONSTERS “

Annie wasn’t lying when she said this fic has it all. What started as some kind of crack fic turned into something beautiful that completely owns my heart. The interactions between the characters are so heartwarming, and while I sense that some major drama is going to occur soon, I also know that this will eventually have a happy ending. It’s delightful, and it does belong to my personal favourites as well.

Some of You by tangerinechar

Rating: Mature

Warning: N/A

Length: 60640 words

Chapters: 7

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: “Lan Wangji gets drunk and tweets a love confession, Wei Wuxian panics, and all of twitter decides to matchmake Lan Wangji and his mystery guy. “

A social media fic! And a hilarious one at that! If you’re in the mood for an extra panicky, extra obnoxious Wei Wuxian? This is the fic for you. It has one of the sweetest love confessions ever. There’s some background Xicheng too.

Window Shopping by thunderwear

Rating: Explicit

Warning: N/A

Length: 18000 words

Chapters: 1

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: “Lan Wangji didn't look out across the other apartment building often, but now, as he scooped up his escaped rabbit, he looked over only to see a piece of paper taped to the window of the apartment across from him. It was written on purple construction paper in big block letters, like a child had written it. WHAT'S YOUR BUNNY'S NAME???“

I did already rec this one to you, but WHO CARES? A Quarantine fic! The first one I came across, and I loved it! A friend of mine thought Wei Wuxian was OOC, but I disagree - he didn’t exactly grow up in the same circumstances as in canon, and his life situation isn’t 100% the same, so I still think it fits. A-Yuan makes an appearance, and the interactions between Lan Wangji, Wei Wuxian, and the boy are just so very cute!

Home is Where the Heart is by Alipeeps ( @alipeeps here on tumblr)

Rating: General Audiences

Warning: N/A

Length: 10036 words

Chapters: 1

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: “Wei Ying’s expression is tight and unhappy, his entire body held rigidly away from Lan Zhan.He doesn’t look at Lan Zhan as he says, “You don’t have to worry, Lan Zhan, I’m never going to touch you.”The distaste in Wei Ying’s voice makes Lan Zhan’s blood run cold.“Just because our families have arranged this marriage, we don’t have to be together… like that…” Wei Ying’s mouth twists unpleasantly. “It can be a marriage in name only. A...” he swallows, looking like he might be sick, “...a business arrangement.”

Arranged Marriage AUs are also one of my weaknesses, especially if the two soon-to-be-married people are actually in love with each other but have yet to confess, This one does the trick. It’s modern era with no cultivation, and the mutual pining is REAL in this one.

what else is there? by mme_anxious

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warning: N/A

Length: 12917 words

Chapters: 1

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: “Did you hear the terrible news? Yiling Laozu Wei Wuxian has gone beyond the pale! He has murdered Hanguang-Jun!”This is the first thing the swan hears flying over Yiling, and it sets him to hissing. It’s the kind of sound he would never make as a human, but as a swan—a mute swan— hissing is the only form of communication available to Lan Wangji. So he hisses. -Jin Guangyao transforms Lan Wangji into a swan. Only an act of love will break the curse.”

A fairytale!AU based on Swan Lake. You might have seen my Swangji drawing; this is the fic it was drawn for. It takes place in canon universe and is super lovely and magical. I may have cried a bit.

all your life you’ll dream of this by Attila ( @attilarrific here on tumblr)

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warning: N/A

Length: 22668 words

Chapters: 1

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: “Lan Wangji should refuse. He should. He looks back down at the mask. Beneath it is the soft creamy paper of the invitation. He could present this at the door and slip into the palace and—“Go see him, Wangji,” Lan Xichen says quietly, and Lan Wangji feels his resolve crumble beneath him”

Another fairytale!AU - this time, it’s loosely based on Cinderella, with Lan Wangji as Cinderella and the forehead ribbon as glass slipper. Such a lovely lovely fic. May also have cried a bit; it’s heartfelt and magical and so warm and sweet.

Love wakes me by dea_liberty

Rating: Explicit

Warning: N/A

Length: 42812 words in total

Chapters: 4

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: "It starts with a bet. All mistakes, Wei Wuxian thinks, start with a bet. It’s starts with a bet and ends with Wei Wuxian losing everything. Nine years ago, Wei Wuxian made a bet with disastrous consequences. Now, he is part-owner of the popular and eclectic Yiling Cafe, years and miles away from his old life, making the best of things and trying to leave the past where it belongs. When Lan Wangji walks into his cafe by accident, Wei Wuxian finds himself doing what he thought he'd never do again; reclaiming some small part of his past, and hoping for a future he'd given up as lost.”

If someone had told me that I would fall head over heels in love with a Coffee Shop AU, of all things? I would have laughed...yet here we are. I’ve read this thing in one sitting and cannot stop thinking about it. I absolutely have to reread it; it’s slowly but surely becoming one of my personal favourites.

#Wangxian #Fic Red #The Untamed #MDZS #CQL

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preathbar · 6 years

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Mobile Preath Timeline

It’s all here, and it’s a lot

Helpful Links: about navigation fic recs

THE FOLLOWING IS ORIGINALLY FROM SKATERTOBIN'S BLOG:

Ok so here’s what we think went down:

2015 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

AUGUST TO I WANNA SAY NOVEMBER? They get close during the victory tour, Chris being the only other person aside from Alex to be invited to Tobin’s 100th cap dinner and all and them sharing a seat at the White House. Basic stuff.

DECEMBER Christen tags along with Tobin on her Hawaii strolls (especially since both Cheney and ARod aren’t around for the Hawaii game). Wander around Waikiki Beach and hang out with Friends with Flowers in their hair and other fun things like that. Maybe Christen watches Tobin surf at some point and maybe Tobin teaches her how as well. 👀 Idk. But I’m positive swimming happens in cute bikinis because I mean.... it’s Hawaii!! 🙄 They they fly to NOLA for the last VT game. And Press is probs like “hey so where ya staying at after this (the China game)?” like while they’re walking along Bourbon Street where the Leather Jacket™ makes its first appearance. Then tobs is probs like “maybe Portland?” Then Chris is all “well that’s just a state away from where I’m headed wanna crash for a bit?” Then tobs, being the homeless little shit that she is, is maybe like “sweet can we go to the beach” then Christen is all “literally everyday” and then done deal. That’s that. So from there they take the same flight to LA from the NOLA airport. Why? Who knows but tbh Tobs maybe (definitely) stays in PV with Pressy and maybe (definitely) is the reason why Christen’s late to that boat parade at Newport with ARod and Whit cos you know... busy being a good host and such. But then it’s the holidays so we know Tobs would go home to her fam in the east coast for Christmas like the good daughter she’s supposed to be so she does, but she goes right back to LA to maaaaaybe celebrate Chris’ birthday. Boop. And you know since she’s already there they’re probably like, “why not spend New Year’s Eve together and train together at the TOCA center while we’re at it???” Like it’s the most obvious thing because I mean maybe they realize they’d be playing more together with Christen nally being close to a starting spot. Hawink!!!! Work on their chemistry as the kids call it because ya know... First Touch Is Everything™.

2016 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

JANUARY So maybe Tobs flies back to spend New Years with fam again because Chris can’t have her forever. But also maybe not because that would have been very convinient since they get called in to camp in Cali shortly after. But I mean you know, who knows. But wtvr. So there they spend a lot of time together like going to the beach together and getting coffee together and entering and exiting the locker rooms and US soccer vans together. You know. Fun stuff. Then the SD game happens and then they all fly to their respective homes but Tobin doesn’t have a home remember so she invites Press to go to Portland with her and they hold hands at the airport while Press is wearing the Purple Hat™ and maybe they go to the Nike HQ together and go furniture shopping and then they have dinner at a fancy restaurant and Tobs shows Chris around her soon to be new home like a local. Then they fly back to LA because beastmode soccer is a thing and they wanna train and be beasts. And then in between they share sunsets together and play with Morena and Khaleesi and Tobin is snookums.

FEBRUARY It’s Olympic Qualifiers in Texas and well what do you know??? The little shits score a goal together, and then steal the van keys so they can go out on Valentine’s Day. There’s a monkey stuffed toy involved and I hate my life basically because @ god, why. 🔥 They go back to LA together after celebrating their Olympic qualifying win to watch the Arsenal vs Barça game in Santa Monica and have sushi together and also crash the u16 camp. Then they go back to PV and Fly Away™ because All We Need Is Love™. Also because christen has a fUCKING BODY ISSUE PHOTOSHOOT that they’re tOTALLY NOT SUBTLE ABOUT. Ok maybe they’re totally subtle. Kind of.

MARCH They go into the SheBelieves Cup in Florida and go Raw Juicin’ and jewelry shopping because that’s what gal pals do obviously. Chris probs tags along when Tobin hangs out with her French friends and they fly back together to NJ to meet Christen’s fam (who would have thought?!) and to NYC to Find Neverland. And then I mean imagine the goodbye for when they go their separate ways for the NWSL preseason and if you’re wondering how they’d cope, the answer is: Not well.

APRIL They meet again for the Orlando camp and they all gotta be lowkey and concentrate on the training but then the OCSC vs PTFC game happens and they’re not so slick and get accidentally recordedand Tobin’s like 🙅🙅🙅... So they train in Orlando and Colorado and win in Connecticut and Philly vs Colombia and then they play chess in between and have coffee. Turns out they’re new bus buddies too now Allie’s in camp. And maybe (definitely), Jill Ellis is a fangirl and ships the little shits together because suddenly Press is a right middy and Tobs is a right back. If not for the sole purpose of Foudy saying on live television that Tobin would be watching Christen’s ass the entire game, basically. Anyway. CAPTAIN Tobs gets some winking action caught on camera and we’re all just gone. Adios. Goodbye.

MAY NWSL starts back up and we’re all excited but also sad because preath but they’re fine and we’re being dramatic but not as dramatic as them because apparently they desperately miss one another??????.... So like, when Chicago plays in Seattle the same weekend Portland plays at home, what else would Tobs do right? Would she drive four hours to watch the game? The answer is yes. But why right???? WHYYYYY???? Because obviously, Press in the west coast means some much needed quality time in Portland i.e. a double date at a fancy vineyard with a view and some tacos.

JUNE The games vs. Japan happen in Denver and happen in Cleveland and that’s apparently not enough for them because Tobin tags along with Press and the Chicago girls to watch the MehNT and the Jumbotron loves them just as much as they do each other. The two part series of a battle of the baes in the CHIvsPOR NWSL games starts in Chicago and ends in Portland so naturally (duh) Press stays in Portland so the little shits could have private training sessions together before flying to Chicago again. Fuckers. (Honestly it’s not practical but thEY INSIST)

JULY The game vs South Africa happens after which they conveniently skedaddle ahead of everyone else in a separate car because of dinner reservations at yet another fancy restaurant. They both make it to the Olympic 18 and they “celebrate” it by going on a not-so romantic getaway to the ESPYS in LA and then they have dinner with Alex and Allie because like, Press probably (I’m sensing a theme, are you?) gotta have an initiation of sorts because things bout to get serious. 💁 But well Tobin gets an initiation of her own too so they’re even. 😅 But well, Tobin gets They head into camp in KC then win their Olympic send off game against CRC👀 and fly again to camp in DC with the NJ crew and chill before flying aGAIN for the Olympic Games !!!

AUGUST They get to Brazil and have a killer Olympics .............Can you believe the Olympics got cancelled this year?????? Amazing. Anyway. That’s irrelevant. What’s not irrelevant though!!!!!! is them coming back to the states!!!! But instead of going straight home, the little shits get a connecting flight from Chicago (to probably get stuff??) to Portland together to get away from it all. Some good music, good coffee, a little kite flying and some R & R with good company and suddenly all is right in the world again. 👍 NWSL regular season to look forward to.

SEPTEMBER So like, the NWSL starts up again right and they go their separate ways and you’d think they’d calm down a bit but BITCH YOU THOUGHT because they secretly meet up again because Press is Tobin’s plus one at her sister’s wedding in Rhode Island and she’s even invited to the rehearsal dinner which is “for immediate family and the bridal party only”. Cyb Press is considered immediate family?????? I can’t TBH. Anyway. That’s only for the weekend though because they gotta get back to their teams to play and try and get berths to the playoffs.... which they boTH DO!! Nice. NT training camp follows and it’s in Columbus so oBVIOUSLY Ms. Portland’s gotta fly in a day early to the east coast to meet up with Captain Chicago & Co. and we find out that Tobin’s tired af and that JJ is a shipper. 😌 Then Columbus happens where we finally get the goal celebration we truly deserve and where the whole stadium empathizes with two college dudes who are like “damn bro, number 12 ain’t straight”. And we can’t forget the regular coffee date . I swear to god it’s an addiction at this point. The game in Georgia isn’t as eventful as the last time we played the Netherlands but I guess it isn’t short of hearteyes. 😍

OCTOBER So anyway. Can you believe the NWSL gets canceled after the Thorns win the shield???????? This “playoff match” doesn’t actually happen. It’s true. Press just visits Portland to go mermaidingwith Tobin. (Euphemism? We may never know) So after then they fly to LA for a Sia concert because they can. But anyway, remember when we thought we got the goal celebration we deserved during that Thailand game? WRONG. Apparently the Swiss have other ideas because we’re all blessed and I’ve never felt more alive than I’ve ever felt in my life in this moment. And we almost get a repeat performance but I mean I guess it’s true lighting doesn’t strike the same place twice. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ̄ or something like that. La Blanquita goes Batista a few days later and Tobin has been established as a pretty useless maid of honor but I mean, she looks cute and her outfit repeater of a plus one (who is yet again invited to the rehearsal dinner!!!!!) looks cute too.

NOVEMBER At this rate is it even still surprising they’re practically living together? Portland Preath gets a part /something/ (because honestly who the fuck is still keeping track? Hint: not me) So Press Painting rainbows in an oversized, expensive ass Pride shirt in Tobin’s Portland kitchen is a thing thanks to Tobin’s (not Kling’s. Gotta make that clear.) very distinguishable floorboards and countertops. And apparently Press is practically a Thorn at this point, too, what with all that ball-kicking and strength training in Providence Park? Yeah. Ikr. Gross. They come to NorCal (to have coffee with a baby for practice) for the first Romania game and CYB they have chemistry on the field????? Like who woulda thunk?!?!?!?!? Also Press gets a hatty because she’s???? good???? at????? soccer????? (Also Christen brings herself sandwiches during games. Tobin doesn’t but CP ain’t selfish. If yanamsayin. Also, they’re literally married. Just thought you’d like to know.) K so anyway, boop boop, ROU part 2 aka the SoCal game becomes the perfect finish to the USWNT calendar year eSPECIALLY for the little shits because not only do we all get Blessed™ with another Preath goal, but basically Preath saves 2016 via great passes, bedroom eyes and hand holding. (PRESS SCORING AND ASSISTING IN EVERY GAME SINCE SWITZERLAND BTW????? Like, thank you, Tobin.) So no more games for the rest of the year, but that will not stop them from doing couple things because!!! They!!!! Are!!!!! Little!!!! Shits!!!!! The zenpups think so too. But anyway! It’s the return of Sunsets and Snookums in LA can you believe!!!!! There’s a romantic museum trip somewhere in the mix and some soccer on the beach too! Chris realizes then that her true passion is to be part of the circus and it’s all because of Circuit Bouldering in Portland (read: their home). Or I guess a second home because looks like Chris finally gets settled into her new house by the beach for a hot minute to enjoy rainbows before jetting off again. ✈

DECEMBER Right so Grassroot Soccer holds a gala and Christen is the guest of honor also it’s Tobin’s turn to be a plus one (and to a red carpet event at that!) in frEAKING LONDON and they’re both beautiful and I’m dead. I’m also thinking Chris is the one that scored them tickets to the Arsenal game the night before the gala because she is whipped and In LoveTM. Gross. They don’t stop there though because they think they’re sneaky Pete about watching El Clasicowith the fam (aka Allie & Bati) BUT NO!!!! You caught muthafuckas! There’s dancing in alleyways and reconnecting with old Spanish friends, too. Gross x 2 Euro trip continues in Sweden and Tobin and Christen literally sit on a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G and it’s all so scenic and romantic. Gross x 3 Well, I didn’t think they’d ever come back from their European bae-cation, but they do and it’s straight to Portland for some Christmas decorating and Tobin wins POTY to make up for this shitty year so they celebrate by getting some coffee and tacos and training - their faves. Duh. It’s kind of a quiet Christmas, celebrating with their own friends and family but I mean, it’s Pressy’s birthday. So they reunite and go hiking in LA and Christen gets a new name. Hi Kristen! 🖐

2017 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

JANUARY After ringing in the New Year with skiing and kisses (probably), Chris spends time in Portland, having shakes and breakfast with the bae. They go back to LA coming out of their own little bubble because it’s January training camp season and I’m having major flashbacks with them riding together to training and being locker room buddies! Their off day is as glorious as we’d expect, with some beach time and fun. (Thanks to JJ for being a shipper.) And we’re also blessed with Allie Long and a Harry Video. After camp, they’ve got a ton of down time so it’s the perfect opportunity to go chilling by their beach house. I say “their” because there’s a stray surfboard lying around and I’m sure as hell it ain’t Christen’s. 💁

FEBRUARY The next camp for SheBelieves isn’t til later on in the month so they fly back to home number 2 aka Portland to chill and be low key, watching Tove Lo on their date night. Tobin has a little photoshoot where she's in all her sweaty glory and itty bitty shorts and Christen flies off on her own for a bit for an appearance then it’s back to Portland for a low key vday. And then camp starts up and it feels like a drought but really, we’ll take what we can get. And what we get are matching backpacks and Harry.

MARCH The SheBelieves Cup starts really well with an Allie IG takeover (which is always gold js) and we’re blessed with cameos of the lovers slash bus buddies!! And we see that age old Preath Connection that we know and love. We even get a possible date night in between!!!! The second game is a doozy but the most important takeaway is that they’re literally married. From the bus to the locker rooms, from the bench all the way to the sidelines. Married. Wives. For life. Fact. Even the Press Pack is supportive. Last game of the tourney and it was a loss. Lol. Anyway. They were trying to be sneaky and we learn that the fams are at the games together to support them. That’s it. Next. There’s a lot of debate about whether or not Tobin calls Christen “babe” because we’re all thirsty but there’s also the thing about helping Chris move to her new Chicago apartment so insert Oprah what’s the truth gif here. And then before the month ends, there’s a perfectly planned preseason tournament in Portland. Right before which Press kidnaps Tobin and escapes to LA for some hula dancing and pineapples, and then brings her back because plus ones at weddings are overrated (not). But the tourney goes on and Tobin’s not playing but she’s enjoying her box in the stands. Meanwhile, Christen just wants to say hi.

APRIL Not much really happens because they’ve suddenly gone 100% stealth mode, with Tobin injured and not able to travel and all, but thanks to a little tweet we see that on NWSL opening day there was still some sort of support aka Tobin watching the Chicago game while on the stands for the Portland home opener. It’s better than nothing right? Oh and when Chicago visits PDX for the 3rd game, Chris gets taken down and Tobin looks away because she probably can’t watch it without going apeshit idk. Same. Anyway, Chris sends smiles towards the box and I guess I’m okay with that.

MAY “what injury?!” Tobin then says as she boards a flight to Chicago after the Thorns game to bear witness to/be the reason behind the end of the drought (goals & content tbh thank you). Cyb her back died so CRS could rise? Meanwhile to pass the time though Tobs becomes Asst Director for the Thorns youth program and paints for bae. And right after their respective weekend home games, Press ies out to PDX for Tobin’s birthday shebang. Tobin picks her up from the airport and takes her to her party and everything!

JUNE A couple of friendlies abroad happen but since Tobs is injured she’s off the roster but she does somehousewarming for Chris til she gets back from practicing on babysitting Cash. So after that, getting back into the swing of things in the NWSL is easy for Chris but unfortunately Tobin still can’t play so the next best thing is staying together in ChiTown to keep the blues away for like.... 2 weeks.

JULY ...Tobin’s still injured. But at least she has some fresh shoes (and expensive sliders)! And Press spends some time in LA to keep her company at rehab. Some people thought July was gonna be the first month we don’t get any content and Press personally makes sure it isn’t during the Chi vs Orl game on lifetime.

AUGUST We have a weird Tournament of Nations and it’s probably because Tobin’s back hasn’t resurrected yet but in the last game in LA, we get a rare sighting of a stud at training so maybe we’ve still got a shot. I mean I guess 2nd place in our own tournament isn’t so bad? Kinda? But whatever. What’s important is the roller blading that happens the days after. And then it’s time for CHIvsPOR. And after that, Tobin’s back in LA hanging out with Chris’ sister and bro-in-law at a bar because you know, they’re close or whatever.

SEPTEMBER Ok so it’s been quiet but it’s not because of anything crazy. They’ve just done better at the privacy thing. Good on them you know ? But anyway. They reunite in Colorado and Cincinnati.

OCTOBER The final regular season match is conveniently in Portland and unfortunately, they end up not playing each other in the semis so Chicago has to book a flight to NC but Chris still makes sure to enjoy her time. So after the uswnt game that Tobs has to sit out, the only time we have proof that Tobin is still alive is the Century 21 event in Arizona. Meanwhile Chris is back home with her pups in LA. But Tobs flies to get in on the puppy love but we only know through her shadow and when they turn into wine moms for a night.

NOVEMBER Fall this year is coming along quite nicely but not as nice as it is in Portland, probably, because there are Trainbows, says Chris! In Canada Chris serves some gross hearteyes despite the fact that Tobin’s been sidelined due to injury. They have the last game of the year in Cali and it kickstarts the swaggin they do together. And then November ends with a bang with them posting about flying to london for a red carpet event!

DECEMBER Said red carpet event is the annual Grassroot Soccer Gala. (And this time Tobin doesn’t go ghost!) And they just wander around taking good pictures and visiting friends and watching football! Thanks HAO! Thanks Crystal! And then they’re back to being Domestic!Preath canoodling in their LA loft by the beach, chillingand hangin out with friends and being Christmassy and such.

THE FOLLOWING IS NOT FROM SKATERTOBIN'S BLOG. IT'S FROM PREATH-THINGS

DECEMBER (CONT.) Christmas rolls around, and they end up going back to their respective fams, meeting back up in Portland some days later. They spend New Years eve snowboarding and just chilling in the snow with their friends. 👌

2018 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

JANUARY New Years is spent in Portland going sledding, but they eventually head back down to California so Tobin can get her ankle fixed. January camp happens without Tobin. But it's fine because Christen and Tobin spend every other moment together, watching sunsets in the rain and Tobin's having a super duper good recovery. Christen finds a new club in the NWSL, surprise! After the friendly against Denmark, they're back to spending all their time together, holding water bottles and attending conferences.

FEBRUARY Tobin has a new job ! Modelling for the new Mercurials in London, whilst also showing off her piano skills, which Christen's obviously heard before with there being a keyboard and all hanging around at their places. Tobin continues her modelling career in LA because the shoes are orange so of course she would. Christen on the other-hand pays a quick visit to houston then reports to camp. Tobin's still out and not playing soccer because remember she's still trying out her modelling career.

MARCH The SheBelieves Cup happens. Or maybe it doesn't. Debatable, considering Christen is bascially nowhere to be found on the pitch, and there's little evidence of her even being at camp. Tobin's also too busy moving from her modelling career to her acting career to be there and play. The uswnt wins the cup somehow anyway. Christen goes back to Portland after the cup and it's a bit quiet but Tobin and Christen are spending some quality time together so isn't that really all that matters? Another surprise ! Christen doesn't want to be with her new NWSL club. So she's heading to Sweden to relive some good times instead, but not before flying kites with Tobin. Tobin also paints a few things inlcuing a 9 post equality sign because she's just that extra.

APRIL Christen returns to her happy place. 🇸🇪 She signs with Kopparbergs/Göteborg FC and scores goals, lots of them. To the absolute surprise of everyone (read: no one) she's named April player of the month in the Damallsvenskan! Tobin decides to put both her modelling and acting careers on hold in an attempt to try her luck at the soccer thing again. Also, being the supportive gal pals that they are, and separated by an ocean, they get into the habit of liking each others instagram posts every so often.

MAY There are pool parties, sea dips and visits to Norway for Christen, during all of which she proves she did in fact pack Tobin's entire closet, accessories and style before she left PDX. Still separated by an ocean, not really too much happens, other than each of them continuing to practice the liking option on each others instagram posts.

JUNE It's Pride Month 🌈 and Pride Month Delivers. Tobin is called up to national team camp for the first time since forever because her ankle seems to be a-okay, and Jill remembers Christen exists all of a sudden and also calls her up. Which means the two lovebirds finally get to reunite in Utah after months of being super long distance. This officially kicks off Pride month celebrations across the globe. Tobin feels 'tight' prior to the game and decides not to join in on the first Pride month celebration of the USWNT aka the first game against China, instead opting to chill and watch the game from the stands. After Tobin sees the Utah Royals owner get down on one knee in front of her girl, she decides it's time to remind the world that Christen is her's by posting a selfie with her and her gal pal. Christen seems to like the photo too and decides to also repost it because it's pride month after all and you gotta spread the love or something. And that's not the only thing she seems to like, deciding to swap clothes with her girl for their date to the Cavs game. Chris wears Tobin's Cavs jersey, like the traitor she is because apparently whilst it might be the wrong team, it's the right number (in other words words.. the things you do for love, and to wear something with the #23). Pride month continues to deliver with the second game against China and what better way to celebrate pride month by marking the game as Christen's 100th cap?!! Oh there are better ways, says the universe or something because Christen assists a goal in the first half, Tobin enters the match in the second half, and we are blessed with a pREATH GOALl!!! or alternatively a small game of keepy uppy between the two lovebirds which ends up with a ball at the back of the net and a Preath celebration we deserve, whichever you prefer to call it. Pride camp ends, but not before Chris makes sure to just leave one last mark on her time in Cleveland. After flying off together to Chi town, they go their separate ways and Chris returns to Sweden. But it seems that Pride month has one last piece of magic to make happen, and Christen's caught up in another big tangle of a messy trade within the NWSL, which lands her in Utah. A trade she accepts. She is now officially royalty. A queen. 👑 Soon after Chris arrives at her new club, Tobin takes a quick pit stop there on her way back from Houston, because obviously she gotta help her girl settle in to her new home away from home.

JULY So it’s the Fourth of July and the new royalty/royals, Chris and Sam decide it’s a great idea to celebrate it by buying food to grill even when neither of them know how to turn on a girl grill! Stuck on how to turn on the offending cooking appliance, Chris uses a lifeline and chooses to phone a (girl)friend. Grill Master Tobin pulls through and saves the day. Not that Christen wants anyone to know that Tobin did (gotta mute those instastories, you know?), but Sam does (thanks Sam!). At the same time, Laura decides to inform the world that Christen lives in Portland (thanks Laura!). The Battle of the Baes returns to Portland for 2018 and it ends with a hug and a kiss drinks back at home. Then it's back to Utah for Chris. The Tournament of Nations happens again and it’s not as weird as the previous year’s (probably because Tobin decides to join in this time around). To prepare for the games, Christen returns home to Portland so the two lovers can visit the Nike HQ, go berry picking and dream about pies. Gotta have that pre-camp preparation and relaxation at home with your SO, you know?! The first game of the tourney is against Japan, and it ends with a W and has Tobin subbing on for Christen. There’s shoulder rubs and hip taps and some airport shenanigans. Remember how Tobin was subbed on for Chris? Chris is subbed on for Tobin in the next game against Australia! It’s now completely apparent that Jill deems having both of them playing at the same time to be just Too Dangerous for opposing teams due to their ridiculous on and off the pitch chemistry. She’s clearly just sparing the opposition from a super embarrassing defeat. Good tactic. Chris’ fam comes to say hi in Connecticut 🖐️

AUGUST The tourney continues and there’s some team pictionary bonding prior to their final ToN game against Brazil. The Brazil game ends with a Tobin goal and assist, a win and a trophy, as the uswnt finally win the tourney!!!! Also, at this stage it's questionable whether the two are trying to be sneaky or not anymore with Chris throwing literal heart eyes at Tobin at the start of the game, and Tobin putting her arm around Chris' shoulder at the end. 🤷 After the ToN it’s back to their clubs and it’s a bit quiet, but I mean as to be expected. What’s not expected however is the shenanigans that happen prior to the NT's first Chile game back in Christen’s hometown. It’s CP's 100th cap celebration, and Tobin pOSTS her girl a congratulatory post ??? Picture, profile tag, emojis and all?? If you thought the girl would stop there with her public celebration of her bae's 100th cap celebration, you'd be d e a d w r o n g. Tobito also proudly wears Christen’s name on her back ??? somewhat earlier than anyone's anticipated ??? Chris has her ceremony, and Tobin literally has the proudest smile, which you could probably see from space— and it’s debatable whether a tear escapes her eyes during the ceremony, but who could blame her if one did?? So it’s game time and we finally get the long-awaited Captain Press, and it’s everything we could’ve dreamed of!!!! Truly spectacular. Tobin gifts Christen with a PK, which she perfectly finishes because she’s Chris. But there’s a big commotion and suddenly the goal doesn’t count???? Because the ref is apparently trying to ruin Chris’s day ??? and doesn’t know the rules of soccer like at all??? Tobin won’t hear of it obvs— leading the rest of the team as they storm up towards the ref with wagging fingers and pitchforks at halftime, whilst at the same time the Press Pack is up in arms. But it’s (semi) fine in the end because Chris gets another goal anyway (it's beautiful)— capping off the perfect night and a perfect victory in the most perfect place. ❤️❤️ Talking about perfect, both Chris and Tobs are also the most perfect human beings, donating their jerseys from the game to TWLOHA.

SEPTEMBER The second game against Chile only features Tobin, but before and after the game she’s wearing a t-shirt that looks strangely like a Supreme-branded shirt with the letters P R E S S spelled out ?? Anyways it's another victory for the team, and everyone eventually heads back to their clubs for the final week of regular season. Then it's postseason time, and Chris returns to Portland to train alone 👎, whilst Tobs is off training with her club. The Thorns play their semifinal game and get the W, obvs cheered on by Chris in the stands. Weirdly enough though, the NWSL championship game for 2k18 just..... never happens ????? Super strange. (Although if it did, Chris was once again there, cheering her girl on) Anyways the season's over, and another season begins— the offseason (aka the best season) where the love birds stroll the streets of Portland (probably holding hands or something cute) and get ready for camp. Although it looks like they might've received the wrong memo about what kind of camp they had coming up— as they end up in the wilderness of Oregon.. camping? And debatably skinny dipping? Who knows?! Is there actually a bikini strap around Tobs's neck? Who knows?! What we do know is that they only packed one suitcase, Christen's gone granola, and the two eventually head on out of there once they realize they're most definitely at the wrong camp— heading off to NC for the camp they were actually meant to be at.

OCTOBER It's World Cup Qualifiers time, and Chris and Tobs score some goals, Chris has suddenly grown a dragonfly on her arm, and sometime between their last uswnt game and the qualifiers, the two nerds have created their own little handshake— because Chris wanted in on the whole handshake club (who could blame her tbh). So the uswnt qualify for the world cup (!!!!!), and the love birds go and celebrate by showing off their Spanish 101 knowledge in Mexico, and literally murdering everyone by posting photos from their beach and infinity pool photoshoots ??? Like cool, it's not like we were trying to live or anything, right ?? Nah. Oh yeah they're also not being subtle about the fact they're in literally the same place either. But you know what, subtle schmutle thinks Chris, as she posts a boomerang of Tobs and her at tees + jeans like it's like no big deal you know like, whatever. They head to pdx to stand in the fall leaves and take more photos of each other.

NOVEMBER So there’s a couple USWNT friendlies abroad which Tobs and Chris don’t join in on due to personal and family commitments (respectively), but it's okay (kinda) because they instead visit an art museum together— fitting right in as the works of art that they are. Oh yeah Tobin seems to be the newest Royals signing? and she's also number 21. Tobs and Chris have a New York minuteweek— jumping into ball pits and casually posting an instastory of themselves together, because obvs it's nbd. They also spend some quality time around thanksgiving with Tobin's fam.

DECEMBER The two head back west and drop by stubhub to give some inspirational pep talk to some young athletes at Nike’s, Play Like a Pro thing and also so Pressy can grand marshal the PV Christmas lights parade ! They also do some toca training, lab visiting, sunset watching, more training/testing and family photo taking. So they basically spend a whole lotta time together— training and being cute and shit ❤️️❤️. They might've headed to Florida also during this time but no one's 100% sure, and it's all a bit of guesswork and squinting. Whatever the case, they were together during most of month because offseason means, barely leaving the bae's side season, until Christmas that is— where they go their separate ways for a couple days. But then it’s Pressy’s birthday aka Christmas 2.0, so Tobs jets back to the west coast to join in on the celebrations, because obviously the best/most important present is Tobin's presence, duh. So they're finally back together in the west coast for the remaining days of 2018, and they finish the year by watching sunsets off rooftops, and preparing to see in the new year together. 💕

THE FOLLOWING IS WHEN PREATHBAR (ME) TOOK OVER.

2019 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

JANUARY It’s 2019! Tobin and Christen ring in the new year much like they ended the last one. They play some beach volleyball, To(es)bin watches some premier league, they continue training, Chris gets lost in LA, makes sure we know she’s feeding Tobin, and finally, they watch the last sunset in LAfor two weeks😂 lol. Before the fun of camp can start, they get delayed at the airport AND TOBIN ACTUALLY ACKNOWLEDGES CHRISTEN’S EXISTENCE. It’s fine. We’re all okay from that. (Also Tobin has some Tibetan prayer beads on?) Christen tells us you can’t mess with her zen and they eventually make it to January Camp in Portugal. Because they can’t live without a sunset, they find some (arguably better) ones on a beach in Portugal. Jan Camp finishes up and as luck would have it the whole team gets delayed this time and Tobin passes the time by playing Mario Kart. The orange and pink Kånken bags make a reappearance and of course, Tobes and Chris are airplane buddies. They arrive in Le Havre, France and everyone is still blissfully ignorant about the future events. Apparently, Tobin took a knock during camp and is held out of the first game on precaution so it is CP vs France. Literally and figuratively. The game against France goes very well, and we’re all so glad THAT game was the one on the weekend. After that *ahem* rough, game it’s time to move on and the team makes their way to Alicante, Spain where Tobes and Chris enjoy a day out and about. Tobin seems to have recovered and gets a start against Spain, CP doesn’t, but after a 0-0 first half, Jill decides to sub her in and SHE SCORES A FREAKING (GAMEWINNING) GOAL. The wives only get to play together for 20ish minutes, but we are treated to plenty of Preath content during and after the game. First, there’s the goal celebration that includes a Tobes head pat and a wink from the one and only Christen Press 😉. At halftime, there’s some hand holding glove holding, but after the game we witnessed a to a PreathTackle™ via Tobin Heath. She’s just so proud of her girl she can hardly contain her emotions (and we can’t either 😭). They return to LA after the madness in Europe just in time to catch a sunrise.

FEBRUARY So very early on into the month, Tobin literally comes out of the blue with her “The Ones” interview while promoting the new Air Jordans, and let me tell you, the photos were anything but chill. The go on a little daytime date 💙 and Christen shows off her many rings. After that, Christen decides to prove that Tobin’s not the only model in the family and hits us with the behind-the-scenes of her photoshoot with localemagazine. Stay tuned until May for our Covergirl. Shortly, our family of models decides to return to their day jobs and attend camp in Tampa, FL for the She Believes Cup. They can’t help but be attached at the hip while they’re there (and we’re not complaining). The team makes their way to Philly and Tobin, Chris, and Ash go on a little stroll where Preath proves, yet again, that they exist in the same universe. USWNT vs Japan is first up and again, Christen comes off the bench and makes an immediate impact with an assist, giving the US the lead. She also gets smacked in the face but it's okay because Tobes makes sure to check up on her. We also definitely win the game and don’t waste all that work CP did by letting them tie it up.

MARCH After the performance against Japan, the team sets their sights to England at camp. To celebrate the “SheBelieves spirit” they all wear the name of an inspirational woman of their choosing on their backs. Christen chooses the unproblematic fave of Sojourner Truth and Tobin chooses Doris Burke, who was very moved by the gesture. Before the game, Christen gives Tobin her stick of gum bc CP still isn’t starting. Unfortunately, the team seems to play as if they are the names on their back and tie. AGAIN. Maybe it was just the cold because Tobes and Chris almost miss the plane back to sunny Florida, but after quickly boarding the gayng gets to sit together. With one more game left, it looks almost impossible for the US to win the tournament, AND WE DON’T, but we manage to win our last game 1-0 with a goal by the one and only Tobin Heath. Unfortunately, it’s now Chris’ turn to make sure Tobin is okay after a hard foul. Before we take a break from the USWNT for a little while, the World Cup kits are announced with a plethora of promotion. Tobin and Christen both return to their club teams and Tobin does some more promotion for the Thorn’s new kits and sixstar. Christen returns to LA to play some preseason games with Utah and while she’s there she is reunited with Morena and Khalessi. CP is announced as the honorary falconer for the LAFC game and reminds us that if the animal isn’t a dog, she’s slightly intimidated. Tobin also plays a preseason game for Portland and apparently tears it up, but her time with the Thorns is cut short when they both re-port for camp and are re-united for the April Friendlies.

APRIL Camp slowly starts to wind down as the upcoming friendlies draw closer, but not before some exciting news. LUNA Bar announces on equal payday that they will cover the World Cup roster bonus pay gap for the entire US Women’s National Team! It is revealed that Christen was one of the “chief architects of the team’s current collective bargaining agreement” and she reminds us how smart and beautiful she is in several different interviews. Then, we are provided with an amazing picture that only confirms that Tobin and Christen are bus buddies (in case we somehow forgot). Press is not only smart and beautiful, but she’s also talented at this game of soccer and helps the team win over Australia in an overly dramatic sort-of way. Tobin notches a goal over Australia, but she doesn’t get any minutes against Belgium. CP, however, plays a full 90 minutes and provides 3 assists off of set pieces!!! Nobody seems to notice though. After two successful friendlies with the National Team, they return to play their first (and last for awhile) games for their NWSL teams. Tobin earns POTY with the Portland Thorns and later, an absolutely wild game is played against Chicago. Meanwhile, Press proves what a class act she is in Utah and notches an assist in her first game and then a goal in the second. Just as they start to settle in, we all sadly realize they have to leave their club teams, even though we STILL don’t have a WC roster, but we do get a bunch of amazing gifs. After her game in Orlando, Christen stays a while in Miami where she shows us her coconuts and does lots of promo before we finally get the announcement we were all patiently waiting for. HuLU hAS LivE spOrTS!

MAY On the first of the month, Tobes and Chris are spotted at the Hulu Upfronts with several other soccer players, looking as gorgeous as ever. Eventually, after virtually the entire roster being known beforehand, USsoccer drops the 2019 Women’s World Cup Roster and Tobin Heath is going to her third World Cup while Christen Press is going to her second, but they’re doing it together this time. With the announcement of the roster, everyone heads to camp before the last of the send-off series games. (Oh and also there’s an incident with Tobin in a button up and her shoulder but whatever. It’s fine.) Remember that “re-” thing Tobin, Christen, Pinoe, and Kling kept teasing/we thought it was an inside joke? Well, it turns Rɘ-inc is an entire company the ladies are starting and they strive to rɘ-imagine rɘ-invent rɘ-configure, and rɘ-volt (to name a few). They are set to launch June 2017 2019 and we can only hope to be blessed with more photos of Tobin wearing... boxers? The first friendly is played against South Africa, and Tobin and Chris actually get to start together, but still, a preath-goal alluded them the entire game. Do you remember back in February when we saw the behind-the-scenes of CP’s shoot with localemagzine? Well now it’s May and Christen is officially a cover girl and I swear they’re all trying to kill us before the World Cup because no one should be allowed to look that hot, but it's Christen so why are we surprised? The penultimate send-off game against New Zealand goes off with little fan-fare (but the girls do notch goals and/or assists). The team seems to have the weekend off before playing their last game and of course, Tobin and Christen return to Portland and decide to watch the Blazers play the Warriors in the Conference finals. How do we know they were at the game? I mean, other than the fact the CP posted a story on Instagram about Nike making Tobes’ dreams come true you could LITERALLY SEE THEM ON LIVE TV BC THEY HAD SECOND ROW FLOOR SEATS BEHIND THE BENCH. Let’s just say we all suddenly cared a lot about basketball that night. A few days later the USWNT heads to New York, is surprised in time square (where T&C are bus buddies, duh), attends GMA, and has Media Day at Twitter’s headquarters. It was a content overload. We never get a break either because few days after that they play their last send-off series game against Mexico and guess what; Tobin and Christen BOTH SCORE (goals)!!! Most would think that having an afternoon game means that the rest of the day is for relaxing and recovery… well, you’d be wrong. Apparently, it’s time for the launch party of Rɘ-Inc and Christen is wearing a Suit. I repeat a Suit at the party and Tobin is wearing a black dress. They both looked absolutely incredible. Rɘ-inc provides us with a lot of amazing content throughout the month. It’s a quick turn around again and the NT now makes their way to London for their final training before the World Cup starts. It’s also Tobin’s 31st birthday and we all hoped and prayed that Christen would post something for it and luckily, she didn’t disappoint.

JUNE It’s officially World Cup Time, but not before a little camp and because the US plays last there’s still time for them to release their 23 stories even after the tournament has officially started. And since we’ve got the time, ESPN announces that Tobin Heath will be profiled on their next E60 special. Tobin finally opens up about… playing soccer… and also her family. In the end, the whole interview makes us love Aunty To-To even more (if that’s even possible) and the unredacted interviews in a podcast are definitely worth the listen. As the last game of the first round of group stage games commences, the USA finally gets their chance to shine, and in a historic 13-0 win against Thailand, boy do they make a controversial statement. Christen notches an assist after she’s subbed in for Tobin because they would be too powerful together on the field. After a few days of rest (and being caught on a live stream with their arms around each other), they play their next game against Chile and while they don’t win 13-0 (which is mostly because Christen gets denied so many times) 3-0 qualifies them for the round of 16. Next up is Sweden and they win 2-0 where Tobin even scores a goal! (Fifa says it’s an own goal but there are lots of things we don’t like about Fifa). Getting first in the group means Spain is our Round of 16 opponent and after a bit of suffering, and Christen’s 2 whole minutes of play time, we win 2-1. Then, it was time for the most anticipated match of the World Cup. A quarterfinal between the USA and France in Paris. SPOILER ALERT: WE WON MOTHERFUCKERS and we even got an adorable hug afterward. Tobin scored ANOTHER GOAL but Fifa is plotting against her and it was called offsides. Now a semifinal versus England awaits.

JULY So… I don’t even know where to begin with this absolutely crazy month. All I can say is... you’re not ready. Guess what! Christen got the start against England and silenced all her skeptics in the 10th minute when she scored a beautiful header! After falling to the ground in pure emotion, Tobin basically nuzzled her head into Chris’s neck in celebration and it was an absolutely beautiful moment for many reasons. The US went on to win and the final would be the USWNT vs the Netherlands. After waiting a little longer to score than usual, THE UNITED STATES WOMEN’S NATIONAL SOCCER TEAM WAS BACK TO BACK, 4-TIME, WORLD CUP CHAMPIONS!!!! TOBIN HEATH AND CHRISTEN PRESS ARE TWO TIME WORLD CUP CHAMPIONS! Tobin ran straight to Christen after the final whistle because they did it together this time. That’s not all though, during the trophy presentation, in the midst of everyone else’s celebration, Tobin looked and Christen and Christen looked at Tobin and they hugged and basically recreated the iconic photo from 4 years ago and I’M STILL NOT OVER IT AND I WILL NEVER BE AND YOU SHOULDN’T BE EITHER. THEN, after ALL of that, T&C decided to go lay in the confetti together and Christen adorably let Tobin throw confetti all over her and I STILL CAN’T. Not to even MENTION the baby Tobin collected and showed to Chris because they’re so domestic™ before Chris decided to adjust Tobin’s medal because they’re also soft™. The real celebration began afterward in the locker room and a lot of alcohol was consumed, but all Chris was worried about was keeping her hair dry with a little blue towel. The next day, after a transatlantic flight and us wondering how they’re going to survive, the team arrived in New York City and the party's just getting started because the day after that the entire team is a guest on Good Morning America. We’re not done yet because the NEXT morning a ticker tape parade through the Canyon of Heroes awaits them (don’t worry, they were on the same float) before a cross-continental flight to LA just in time for the ESPYS (Tobin is apparently dragged, but it was fun). Tobin looks way too damn good in christen’s her v-neck suit, even though her shoe/sunglasses choice was questionable. Christen blessed us with a yellow v-neck suit and both girls were truly “stuntin” on us. THEN THE DAY WE F U C K I N G DIED!!! I’m not even joking. It started out innocent enough (which it really wasn’t but whatever). Christen posted of photo of JUST them together on the float and captioned it “blissful and grateful”. It was already more than we asked for but THEN she started posting pictures of JUST them at the ESPYS on her story and by this point we were already not OKAY. THEN Tobin decided she wasn’t PLAYING AROUND and posted pictures of JUST them on the red carpet and THEN THAT FUCKING VIDEO. T H E STORY TO END ALL INSTA STORIES. What was the video, you ask? Well, what are the New Chicago Bulls Fire J1s… from Travis Scott? Did you see them? How did she get those they’re not even released yet? Watch at your own risk. Finally, both girls decide to decompress and took mini vacay to Los Cabos because why not, you’re world cup champions, and after re-freshing they both fly home to Portland. Of course,their first game back in the NWSL is against each other because only the most chaotic energy is allowed this month. Christen scores the eventual GOTW but the game ends in a tie. Not to worry though because the next week Tobin notches two beautiful assists in the homecoming game against Houston and Christen produces another beautiful GOTW in a game that Tobin attends wearing while wearing a #23 snapback. They really refuse to be separated for more than a few days. Then, as it turns out, they both head back to Portland proving that Tobin’s excursion to Utah really was extra™ and we can only hope we’ll never come down from this content high.

AUGUST Just when we thought we were spoiled by world cup content, the girls decided they’re not done yet and we’re blessed with a TC goal during the first of the Victory Tour games versus Republic of Ireland (foreshadowing: it’s not the first of the month). Christen serves a lovely ball right to Tobin’s head and they were sure to hug adorably in celebration. Before heading back to their clubs, Re-inc hosts an event called ResetTheTable, which is basically a dinner party filled with beautiful people (in body and mind). After returning to Utah Christen scores a brace in a midweek game and helps win another so NWSL rightfully makes her Player of the Week. Then, CP heads to NYC to appear on morning talk shows to educate us about the USWNT lawsuit while looking absolutely stunning. In their last club games before international break, Christen gets another goal, and wins GOTW for the third time, and Tobin’s assists continue to grow (it probably helps that Chris goes to watch her). Their travel has been extra™ this month but it’s what you do for love. Finally, they both head to Philly for campbefore playing against Portugal and we get ANOTHER TC GOAL. Christen is getting really good at assisting Tobes.

SEPTEMBER The second round of victory tour games conclude at the beginning of the month, but Tobes and Chris are pretty adorable at open training before their second win over Portugal. Oh, Christen gets another assist so her total for 2019 is up to… 11! (that’s the leader of the national team). Then, it’s time for Battle of the Baes 2.0 and this time Christen comes out on top. Tobin ends up winning GOTW on week 23… hmm… and the Thorns clinch a playoff spot. Unfortunately, even with Christen’s header, Utah misses out again.

OCTOBER After celebrating their 2019 Women’s World Cup win one more time, the victory tour games conclude in with a pair of games against South Korea. The first one is pretty uneventful, and so is the second (except for the sendoff). Tobin and Chris return to their clubs to play their last nwsl games of the season and the Thorns move on to the postseason. They face Chicago first and find themselves out of the championship game. However, Chris doesn’t seem to mind and makes her way to Portland pretty soon after. Something with re-inc seems to be brewing, but the end of the month marks the beginning of the offseason (after they play two friendlies in November, of course).

NOVEMBER The girls report to camp for the final time this year and everyone seems to be ready for the end of quite an incredible year but also new beginnings with a new coach. Christen and Tobin get a start against Sweden and Christen records another assist and her 50TH INTERNATIONAL GOAL!!! (Tobin may or may not fall to her knees again but that’s not important). Then, we get a TC hug and Tobin gets an assist of her own. Even after playing a game in freezing temperatures they still manage to both look adorably bundled after. The next game is even more fun than the first because Christen scores ANOTHER GOAL and we get ANOTHER TC HUG and to cap it all off we get CAPTAIN TOBIN. That’s right, CAPTAIN TOBIN (we almost got captain Christen but it’s okay). We were just barely coming down from that emotional high when the next night Pinoe brings the entire Gayng to the Glamour Awards. Tobin and Christen had a black and white moment and all I’m saying is they looked the best dressed. Re-inc launched their RWB collection and Tobin was the designer while Christen was a model. Then, Tobin decided to also be a model but in… Africa? That’s right, T and C went to South Africa for Grass Roots Soccer and they also enjoyed a safari or two before heading to London for the GRS Gala. Christen looked absolutely stunning (as always) at the event and there was no doubt that Tobin was there to support her. The holiday season has begun and at the end of the month, the girls went their separate ways to spend Thanksgiving with their families. The break was much needed and I’m sure they’re looking forward to an entire month off.

DECEMBER Tobin and Christen enjoyed their month off by staying pretty quiet, but they did enjoy a snowy vacation towards the end of the month. Then, it was Christmas time and it seemed like a lot of gifts were from Tobin + Christen. Before CP’s bday could happen, they had to attend the WoSo Royal Wedding. They both looked stunning and it was just an unbelievable night in general. Finally, Christen celebrated her 31st birthday right before the decade came to an end. What a truly amazing year.

2020

JANUARY It’s the beginning of a new year and the end of the offseason, but it was still pretty quiet until the very end of the month. January Camp in Florida began in the middle of the month and didn’t stop for the 20 players named to the Olympic Qualifying roster. Obviously Tobin and Christen were and the team relocated to Texas to prepare for their group stage games of Olympic Qualifying.(Also re inc had another reset the table event). Christen started the first game against Haiti and scored a goal in the 2nd minute… talk about starting the year off with a bang. CP was also named the player of the match and she honestly seemed like she was the only one who wasn’t shaking off the rust. Unfortunately, Tobin missed out on the first game due to a slight strain but she was back in action against Panama. She even scored a no-look goal and didn’t think we would notice. Christen also added to her goal total and has now scored in 4 straight games. With two wins in their group the USWNT has secured their spot in the semifinals and are one step closer to qualifying for the Olympics.

FEBRUARY Olympic Qualifying carried over into February and so did Christen’s goal scoring. CP scored two goals in the USWNT’s last group stage game against Costa Rica. The first goal she scored that game was an absolute banger and was eventually named the goal of the tournament. Also, Christen was named player of the match for the SECOND TIME of the tournament. The goal-scoring didn’t stop because she scored another banger against Mexico after jumping on her own rebound. There was no way that ball wasn’t going in the back of the net. After all of this scoring and player of the match wins Christen was rightfully named best player of the entire CONCACAF tournament. She was absolutely glowing with her golden ball trophy before she gave it to her father (who was more than appreciative). Tobin was also feeling generous and gave her first place medal to a fan in the crowd (I guess that’s allowed?). After successfully qualifying for the olympics and remaining reigning CONCACAF champions, everyone had a slight break before training for the She Believes Cup began. Tobin and Christen were named to the roster, but before training could begin the gals had a photoshoot in the brand new olympic kits. I’m not saying Christen decided to debut her new engaygment ring at said photoshoot but I’m not not saying that. (Good job Tobin ;) ) It’s definitely not the offseason anymore and on February 29th, we were all leaping for joy that training camp had resumed in Florida.

MARCH The whole gayng got to be aunties to Cassius in Florida during camp and apparently it was good luck because the USWNT won their first game in the She Believes Cup against England. It was definitely thanks to Christen’s absolute GOLAZO (the only thing she’s allowed to score against England). CHRISTEN PRESS what have you DONE. The USWNT didn’t stop and neither did Christen because in the next gain against Spain she assisted the winning goal in the 86th minute off a free kick. Christen and Tobin BOTH started against Japan and Christen was even at the number nine spot. Brownsuganumba9 lives on. It must’ve been an amazing position for her (who knew) because she scored another GOLAZO against Japan. It chipped the keeper and it was honestly filthy. CHRISTEN PRESS what did you DO. The USWNT won the She Believes Cup, but are still fighting the equal pay lawsuit against ussoccer. During the warm up of the final game of the tournament they all wore jerseys inside out to display the now iconic symbol of four stars with a blank crest. They’re in this together. Just as the USWNT played their last game, the entire world entered a quarantine. Everyone went home and it’s unclear when anyone will return to the field for club or country. However, in the midst of quarantine, there was a Surprise: Snow Storm! and Re-inc launched their posters. It has also allowed CEO Christen and the rest of the Re-inc team to start doing instagram lives in order to interact with fans. We’re in this together.

APRIL This month began like the last one ended, still in quarantine, but that didn’t stop Re-inc from launching their BW capsule collection, but before that an absolutely INCREDIBLE photo was taken and it's pretty much the only major thing that happened this month. Thank you Miss Tobin Heath. However, all of the re-inc founders have been a lot more active on the account (probably because soccer is momentarily paused for right now). Christen found a Stacy plant and remembrance candle along with other plants for the rest of her fam. Tobin and Christen are most definitely quarantining in Portland together and will be for a while.

#preath timeline

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the-book-queen · 4 years

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Hide your wallets, it’s that time again! #TBQsBookDeals Your Wednesday thread of #romancedeals is ready, FREE to $2.99. Happy shopping! 📚❤

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beedaleebjd · 5 years

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Psssst do you happen to have any tips or beginners links for newbies who are interested in getting in to the BJD hobby? 👀

*SOFT SCREECH* ALICE COME DOWN THE RABBIT HOLE WITH ME... /CLAMBERS FOR

This is a very slap-dash tips post, because a full fledged crash-course would take me much longer than a day to assemble. I think this could get someone started, but I can always answer specific questions if you have them in the future. ❤️

BJD 101: For a rundown of definitions, terminology, and origins of the hobby, I highly recommend checking out the Wikipedia article. (Warning for old vaguely spooky doll photos) I honestly wish I just read this when I got started, haha. It’s not everything, but it’s definitely a start.

Study! Read as much as you possibly can!! Especially terminology and maintenance. I highly recommend watching a bunch of unboxing and review videos- it might seem silly, but they're really helpful to get an idea of scale, how they function/pose, and how they look and feel when handled by a human. I also recommend trying to find owner photos of dolls you’re interested in, because sometimes the store photos are limited!

Join a community! Consider joining a forum like den of angels or a facebook bjd group like BJD Addicts! Exposure to the hobby is really helpful and you learn way faster. It’s fine if you’re shy, you don’t have to interact if you don’t want to- I like lurking DoA for the valuable tutorials and threads on doll brands I'm interested in. Tip: You can view some of DoA’s threads without an account by searching "[subject/doll of choice] den of angels" in google, but i got tired of that pretty fast. Signing up takes a few weeks to get approved but it's worth it for all the knowledge, even old archived stuff.

Window-shop until you drop!! I think the number one regret in the hobby is 'too many dolls, not enough time to love any of them'. So I HIGHLY recommend making wish-lists. These help a lot with avoiding impulse purchases and buyer’s remorse. There are a loooot of dolls out there, so if you've seen a huge majority of them, you'll be more picky.

For me, wishlists include both dream/grail dolls, tentative desires i’m not sure about but want to remember the name of, dolls I could never afford but feel validated writing down somewhere, and also cataloging info- measurements, wig/eye/shoe sizes, resin colors, price, current availability, dealer websites, etc. it becomes such a godsend when you shop for them. you’ll thank me later!!

I spent a lot of time browsing dealer websites like Alice's Collections, Legenddoll, Denver Doll, DOLK Station, etc- I linked some of those here. This is to see what my tastes are. Not EVERY doll company will go through all or any dealers, but it’s a good start!

If you’re the social type, going to conventions or local bjd meetups can help with getting an idea of your preferences! I accidentally walked by one at sakuracon last year and got to hold an MSD and an 11cm tiny, and that was REALLY helpful for me to realize I DID like those sizes. If other doll owners will let you hold theirs, I totally recommend it! (Always ask first, of course! Not everyone is comfortable with it!)

Go!! Slow!!! if you think you're taking it easy, go even slower. i'm so serious. it's so easy to get dazzled, over-eager, or totally overwhelmed by this hobby. especially if you have a habit of hyper focus/special interest tenancies like i do.

Patience is a virtue anyway: If you’re not buying second-hand or in-stock dolls, you will be waiting a while for your doll. Anywhere from a few months to a year, depending on the company and how backlogged they may be at any given point. Dolls are usually pre-order and take time to be made.

Some people like to just buy sculpts and let a character ‘come to them’, which is absolutely valid so if you wanna just go on a feeling that’s great!! i totally can’t afford that route most of the time, so I spend a lot of time mood-boarding for my potential dolls using pinterest and my own art to see just how in love with an idea i am and highly recommend it. I’ll ramble about this in another post soon.

Budget! They are not very cheap like 10-20$ fashion dolls at wal-mart, so those new to the hobby may be shocked.This hobby is an investment and an indulgence/luxury, as with most Nice Things. But don’t be discouraged! There are affordable dolls out there, a lot of Dealer websites offer layaway plans, and the second-hand market is always circulating things!

Here is a DoA list of dolls that are under 300$.

Note: Size of dolls often scale with price, so the bigger it is, the more expensive (and HEAVY) it will be. Some videos on BJD sizing here and here, but Flickr is crawling with height comparisons as well.

Craft or Not To Craft: Are you team 'i'm gonna sew/craft stuff/do wigs/eyes/faceups for my doll' or team 'i'm gonna buy clothes/props/faceups/wigs/etc from other artists!'? I know most people end up being a little bit of both, but these things both cost time or money (or both) so you wanna think about that in the overall price when you're considering a doll. It seems intimidating, but really, it’s the responsible thing to do. I’d rather plan for it than have a naked sad doll to feel bad about. Some personal recommendations below helped me get started:

Wigs: Monique Gold Collection wigs are affordable in the 20 dollar range, and have incredibly soft fiber! (You can find a lot of these available through ebay sellers as well)

Eyes: Lemonjellyshoppe and CandyKittenEmporium have some incredible eyes and also do custom orders!

Sewing Patterns: DGRequim on etsy and SproutyDoll have both been very nice to use and easy understand and modify to fit your doll!

When you’re savvy on the sizing of your dolls and if you’re comfy with secondhand sales, Facebook groups like BJD Addicts Sales & Commissions, BJD Lovers Sales, and BJD Adoption has a lot of people selling BJDs and accessories, oftentimes discounted for de-stashing or collection overhauls!

In addition to the other dealer sites I linked before, Dollmore (which also has an ebay shop) has a lot of options on everything!

Rec@sts and the community- This is a veeery hot button topic, but you’ll probably see a lot of it the more you get into the hobby. I don’t want to talk about it a lot because of the negativity it attracts, but to sum it up: BJDs are essentially commissioned art pieces. They are hand sculpted by an artist or small group of artists, and then cast in resin and refined and strung by hand. There are people that will cast copies of them and sell them for a very cheap profit. To put it simply, it’s theft, and it effects the livelihood of people that make a living of their art. A lot of companies stop making dolls because they can’t compete anymore. Most official doll/art related conventions (LDoll, Resin Rose, etc) ban rec@sted dolls, as well as DoA and several of the facebook groups. Be sure to read all the rules of groups/forums you join them.

A lot of people come into this hobby unaware of this and buy a bootleg doll on sites like Ebay or Aliexpress, and then get turned away from the community without understanding why. There are understandable circumstances that cause someone to end up with a bootleg doll, but it’s also important to respect the artists and creators that share their art with the public.

On that note: Sometimes people will resell 2nd hand dolls as legit when they are not. Be careful about who you buy second-hand dolls from. Also, keeping certificates of authenticity (CoAs), receipts, and original packaging is must if you ever plan to resell your doll!

I... think that’s everything major I can think of... at least enough to get someone started? I know a lot of it is a bit vague, but if you wanted my opinion on a certain brand or size of doll or budgeting tips if money is tight, I’d be happy to give my personal preferences on that separately!! But otherwise, good luck and happy treasure hunting! ヾ(＾-＾)ノ

#aliceartsrwby #askbox #textposts

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phoenixfeatherquill · 5 years

Text

To Catch A Swan (14/22)

Once upon a time, not so long ago, Neal fell asleep in a car.

He liked the yellow bug. It was a little ostentatious and it was probably foolish to steal it—a white sedan was probably a little less obvious. But he couldn’t help it. It reminded him too much of those Herbie films. There was a homeless shelter in Denver that had zero movies in the rec area, save those movies, so he’d watched them all during a particularly nasty blizzard. He didn’t have fond memories of Colorado, but he liked those movies. (The remake was crap.)

He hadn’t been long in Portland. In fact, it was supposed to be his last night there. No cash for a motel, shelters were packed, so he slept in his car, parked in a little alley to avoid cops. He actually liked crashing in his car. It was a little cramped, sure, but there was something soothing about falling asleep to the sound of rain on his roof. It reminded him of better times.

So it was quite the shock when he awoke to someone breaking in.

The sound of the metal sliding through the window was what woke him. He watched in utter shock as the thief easily unlocked the door and got inside.

She was the most beautiful thief he’d ever seen. Golden hair caught up in a messy ponytail, dark hipster glasses (clever, to avoid detection in Portland), a small smile that indicated she’d done this before. She withdrew a screwdriver, a large rock, and started the transmission. He watched her start to drive off before finally announcing his presence.

“Impressive. But really, you could’ve just asked for the keys.”

He dangled them for emphasis and she yelped. The squeal of shock only made her more adorable. He rested his chin on his fist and observed her. She didn’t seem to know how to react to this situation (it was new for him too), so she remained silent.

Neal gave a little wave of approval. “Just drive, it’s fine.”

“I just stole your car, your life could be in danger!” She’d snapped, perhaps trying to regain her earlier confidence.

“Neal Cassidy,” He introduced himself.

“Yeah, I’m not telling you my name,” She’d fairly snarled and her irritation only made him more amused.

“I don’t need it to have you arrested when the robbery’s in progress,” He chuckled a little.

She set her chin. “Emma Swan.”

Emma Swan. A good name, and he told her so.

“So do you just live in here or are you just waiting for the car to be stolen?” Emma Swan asked sarcastically.

“Why don’t I tell you over drinks?” He suggested amiably.

She turned to look at him over her shoulder in shock. “Excuse me?!”

“Eyes on the road!” Neal pointed at the stop sign Emma blew past. The sound of irate Portland drivers filled their ears. She straightened a little, probably embarrassed.

“I am not having drinks with you, you might be a pervert,” She informed him.

“I might be a pervert,” Neal acknowledged. “But you’re definitely a car thief.”

“I said I was sorry.”

“You didn’t, actually,” Neal felt it relevant to point out. She huffed a little at this but both of them stiffened in fear when the heard the siren behind them. Emma swore a little.

Neal groaned and raked his fingers through his hair. “That’s why I said eyes on the road…”

He could see her eyes flick around and he knew from experience she was judging whether or not it was worth it to make a run for it. But there didn’t seem any good places to run to so Emma put on an artificial smile as she nervously awaited the officer. Neal, however, immediately snatched the screwdriver out of the ignition and replaced it with the keys.

“License and registration?” The officer’s bored and patronizing tone towards Emma’s bright greeting gave Neal an idea.

“Terribly sorry, officer, but this is actually my car. I’m…I’m trying to, uh, teach my girlfriend how to drive stick.” He gave the officer a sheepish grin, one he’d perfected over years of conning authority figures.

“She’s got a lot to learn,” The cop said coldly.

“Yeah, I know, but you know…women.” Neal gave a helpless shrug.

Emma gave him the dirtiest look. But he knew what he was doing. He read the cop the moment he’d walked over and looked Emma all over, condescension fairly dripping from his uniform.

“All right, I hear you. It’s a warning. This time.” The cop gave Emma a stern, paternal look before returning back to his car. Neal thanked him grandly and popped out of the backseat to join Emma in the front.

“What are you, some sort of misogynist?!” Emma demanded as he clambered into the passenger seat.

“You’re welcome,” Neal glanced over his shoulder as the cop drove off. “Oh, go. We got lucky.”

“We?” Emma stared hard at him and he grinned at her mischievously. “This isn’t your car either, is it? I stole a stolen car?!”

Her outrage was palpable and hilarious. He beamed unrepentantly and cocked his head.

“Now how about that drink?”

It had hit him like lightning. It wasn’t merely attraction or companionship. It was something far greater, something he hadn’t understood at 23. His father—before he became the Dark One—had always spoken sadly of love, had seemed almost wary of it. As the Dark One, he’d been mocking towards it. Though even he had apparently been caught up in its magic, with this mysterious Belle character…but no one had prepared Neal for it. He’d fallen in love at first sight with Emma Swan.

She had been understandably apprehensive of him, but charmed too. She expected him to take her to a dive, somewhere they wouldn’t check her ID. He took her out for cocoa instead and brought her to one of his favorite spots—a deserted amusement park. He’d never forget the utter delight on her face when he turned the lights of the carousel on. It was at that moment he wanted to do nothing but make her eyes sparkle like that for the rest of his life.

They’d sat together on that carousel and talked. She’d asked him his story and he was tempted to say, “Which one?” He’d lived so many lives across the years he sometimes wasn’t even sure who he was anymore.

She’d asked about his past and he’d admitted to her his problems with his father. He had shoved his fear and hatred for Rumplestiltskin in a dark place in his heart; it was unbelievable that he was sharing it all with her now, even confessing how he missed having a home.

Their gaze had met and for the first time in a long time, Neal felt like he had a home. Wherever Emma was…was home.

And that night in the sheriff’s office, when she kissed him, something in his heart settled and Neal felt like coming home again.

Everything in his mind went blank. There was only Emma, only how right it felt for her to be in his arms once more, the feel of her soft lips against his, the tangle of her golden curls in his fingers. This was right, this was real, this was home, and he was never going to let it go again…

The phone rang. They were abruptly ripped back into reality and Emma dove for the phone like a drowning woman would grab a life preserver. Panting a little, she answered the phone.

“Hello?”

Neal watched her, his fingers twitching. She glanced at him, the color in her cheeks rising.

“Yeah, fine. I’m…I’m going to get her. And then I’ll question her. Yes, I’ll let her know you’ll be present. Okay. See you then.”

She hung up the phone. She stared at her desk like it would reveal her fortune and Neal cleared her throat. She straightened and looked at him.

“That was Regina. She wants to be present when I question Mary Margaret.”

He nodded. They stared at each other, unable to vocalize what had been lost. The moment was broken. Neal desperately wanted to snatch it back. But did he have any right to?

Emma crossed her arms over her chest. “I’m…I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologize,” Neal broke in immediately. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”

She laughed harshly. “I kissed you.”

“Yeah, well, I kissed you back.”

There was another long pause while Neal pondered what to do next. Emma wiped her chin absently and Neal tried to reclaim his frazzled mind.

“I should—I should go,” He said finally. “Get some sleep. You should too. I’ll…I’ll call you tomorrow morning, okay?”

She nodded but did not meet his gaze. He quickly strode out of her office as fast as he possibly could.

Running away again, coward?

Neal ignored the hateful thought. He thought vaguely that perhaps he ought to do as he’d told Emma, go back to the cabin and sleep. But he had more important business. He turned the corner and heaved a sigh of relief.

The light in Mr. Gold’s pawnshop was still on. He strode forward and banged on the door.

Sweat beaded his forehead. He exhaled again when he heard the slow footsteps of his father approach the door and open it. Gold said nothing about the lateness of the hour, Neal’s frazzled appearance.

“Mary Margaret needs your help,” Neal said without preamble.

Gold leaned against his cane. “Oh?”

“It’s—it’s Regina. I’m sure of it. Regina is setting her up, framing her for the murder of Kathryn Nolan. You have to help her. Mary Margaret needs a good lawyer and fast.”

Neal felt dizzy. He was actually asking his father for help. Was he insane? Whenever his father helped him, people died! But the heat from Emma’s kiss, his fear for what would happen next, everything scrambled his mind.

“I was already intending on offering my services,” Gold said smoothly. “Pro bono, of course. I know what I charge her for rent, after all.”

Neal stilled. “You were going to—why? What do you get out of it?”

Gold said nothing. He watched him and picked up a silver chalice. He polished it carefully and Neal watched the methodical movements in frustration.

“What are you trying to do?”

For some reason, the question cast a shadow across Gold’s face. It disappeared as quickly as it appeared, but Neal, who was an expert at his father’s expressions, felt very cold. All of this was a chess match to his father. He was placing different pieces on the board, arranging his surroundings until the moment he would strike. To trap a queen—but which queen?

Neal turned and walked out of his father’s shop.

XXXX

Neal did not call Emma. Instead, the two of them gave each other a very wide berth as Emma conducted her investigation. He trusted that she would call him if she needed any help. But he needed to figure out what exactly Gold was up to.

What did Gold want? The obvious answer was power. But didn’t he have power here in Storybrooke? Aside from occasionally going toe to toe with Regina, but overtaking her didn’t seem to be a priority of his. But if he remembered who he was…what else would he want?

The answer struck Neal like lightning as he entered Granny’s diner. Gold would want magic.

But this world had no magic. So how on earth could he—

Neal stiffened when he noticed August talking to Henry at the counter. He marched over and snatched August’s shoulder.

“What did I tell you about talking to my son?” He growled.

August sighed dramatically. “Always so suspicious! I was just offering Henry a little friendly advice.”

“Dad, he believes in the book!” Henry said excitedly. “He could help with Operation Cobra!”

“He can help by getting the hell out of here,” Neal said very softly, in a tone uncomfortably reminiscent of Gold’s. August well remembered Neal’s fists and hastily made his exit.

Nolan took the newly unoccupied seat. “Henry, I want you stay away from that guy.”

“But Dad!” Henry complained. “We need all the help we can get. And he’s right. He said we need proof to help Miss Blanchard and we do.”

“Emma is working on finding proof,” Neal nodded at Granny in thanks as she filled him a mug of coffee. “We have to trust her on that.”

“Yeah, well, we found a big knife in Miss Blanchard’s heating vent,” Henry informed him loftily. “And my mom obviously planted it there. So we’re finding proof in the other direction.”

“Does Emma believe the knife belonged to Mary Margaret?”

“Of course not!”

“Then trust her to find the truth. That’s something Emma’s really good at,” Neal took a long sip of coffee. “In the meantime—I mean it, Henry. Stay away from August. He’s not a good guy and he could get you into trouble.”

Henry sized his father up. “How do you know him?”

Neal hesitated. He didn’t want to keep secrets from his son. Rumplestiltskin lived in secrets and darkness; Neal wanted his relationship with Henry open and honest. But how could he tell his son such a thing? That August had played upon his insecurities, frightened him with his warnings of Emma’s destiny and the Enchanted Forest—and had convinced him to leave her? Could Henry ever forgive such weakness?

“Look,” Neal put his hand on Henry’s shoulder. “I just want you to trust me on this one, okay? Stay away from him. Promise me?”

Henry’s brow furrowed and Neal was strongly reminded of Emma. After a long moment, Henry nodded.

“I just want to help prove that Miss Blanchard’s innocent,” He sighed and pushed his now cold hot cocoa away.

“I know it’s frustrating,” Neal acknowledged and ruffled Henry’s hair. “But trust me, kid. Emma knows what she’s doing. And I’m looking into it too. If Regina is setting her up—”

Henry’s eyes lit up. “I’ve got it!” He crowed.

Before Neal could ask what he was talking about, his son hugged him fiercely and dashed out of the diner as fast as his short legs could carry him.

XXXX

Neal wasn’t able to catch his son the day after, to find out what exactly had inspired his outburst. But he learned that Mary Margaret had accepted Gold’s help and her arraignment was scheduled for the following morning. At the very least, Neal had confidence in his father’s talents. He would keep Mary Margaret from being arrested. Not everyone could nearly beat a man to death and persuade (or blackmail) a judge to ignore the matter.

The rest of the day was quiet but very busy. Jefferson nearly overwhelmed him with odd jobs the entire day, so much so, that by the end of the evening, Neal almost decided to crash at Granny’s inn rather than make the long trek home. It was still freezing and nothing seemed more unpleasant than a cold, windy walk back to the cabin. It hadn’t been the first time he’d crashed at Granny’s. And he could check in at the sheriff’s office first thing in the morning. Maybe bring Emma some coffee…

But he still hadn’t talked to her about that kiss. Did she even want to see him?

Finally, Neal decided to walk home. He needed the time to figure out if it was even worth broaching the topic of the kiss. Emma was completely immersed in Mary Margaret’s case—as well she should be. It wasn’t really time to talk about the nature of their relationship. He should leave it alone. He knew better than to push Emma. No one could deny she had walls—many she’d built because of him—but breaking them down forcefully would only wreck her further.

He’d nearly reached the cabin on Jefferson’s land when he noticed something odd.

There were lights on in Jefferson’s house.

At any other moment, this would not have concerned Neal. Jefferson was something of a night owl and Neal had gotten used to his odd employer taking walks at 3AM, occasionally skulking around the gardens in the middle of the night, or even having an all night nightcap, which he often invited Neal to join in. But Jefferson had specifically told him that he would be out of town tonight and it was doubly urgent that Neal complete all of the errands by that evening.

Why would Jefferson have lied to him about being out of town? It made no difference to Neal. They weren’t exactly friends. Neal didn’t care what Jefferson did or didn’t do.

Unless…had he dumped all of those errands on Neal to keep him away from the house?

The idea was paranoid. But Neal couldn’t seem to escape the niggling feeling that something was off. And he’d learned at this point in his life it was best to trust his instincts. The last time he hadn’t, Graham had ended up dead.

Jefferson was always extending invitations for drinks. He would go up, have a glass of beer with him, see if anything was amiss, and head back home. No problem.

Neal cast one more longing look towards his cabin and shut out the yearnings for his nice, warm bed. He trudged up the hill towards Jefferson’s front door and raised his hand to knock. He then thought better of it and tried the handle.

To his surprise and unease, it yielded immediately.

He stepped inside. “Jefferson? You here?”

The house was eerily quiet. It had always been far too big a place for one person and Neal had repeatedly told him so. Jefferson always smiled an odd little smile and agreed.

“Hey,” Neal called out again. “It’s Neal. Everything okay? I thought you were going out of town tonight.”

He continued to walk down the hallway. He thought he heard something, a scraping noise, metal against stone. He followed the sound and turned a corner—and nearly ran into Emma and Mary Margaret.

“Emma?!” Neal said thunderstruck. “What are you doing here?”

“Neal, thank God!” Relief broke over Emma’s face. “We have to get out of here. Right now. He’s crazy! He tied Mary Margaret up!”

“Keep your voices down!” Mary Margaret implored. “He’ll hear us!”

“Neal, quick, we have to—”

They were interrupted by the click of a pistol cocking.

“Sorry, Neal,” Jefferson said ruefully aiming the gun towards them. “I really didn’t want you to be here for this.”

XXXX

“What the hell is going on?! What the hell are you doing?”

Jefferson clucked sympathetically and pointed the gun at all of them. “You should’ve stayed in Storybrooke tonight, Neal.”

“Put the damn gun down!” Neal moved bodily in front of Emma and Mary Margaret.

“I’m afraid that just isn’t possible,” Jefferson sighed. “Emma. Tie Spot back up, please.”

Neal calculated his odds. He was likely to get shot if he rushed Jefferson but there was a chance he’d only hit Neal, and the scuffle would give Emma and Mary Margaret a chance to escape. But before he could make a move, Emma placed a hand on his shoulder.

He looked at her and she shook her head. After so long, how could she read him so well?

“Single file, please,” Jefferson said in a bored voice. “Forward march.”

They slowly walked into a small, dark room, where a trembling Mary Margaret returned to her seat. Emma whispered something to her and tied her wrists and replacing the gag. She then turned to Jefferson.

“Your telescope,” She accused. “You’ve been watching me.”

“You’ve what?!” Neal thundered.

“It points towards the Sheriff’s office,” Emma’s eyes never left Jefferson’s face. “Why?”

“I need you to do something for me,” Jefferson replied quietly. “Neal—if you make any move towards me, I swear, I will blow Miss Swan’s head off. Let’s go.”

He must have noticed Neal’s fingers twitching. Boiling hot rage coursed through Neal’s veins and he said in a low voice.

“Is this why you hired me? To get close to Emma?”

Jefferson didn’t answer. He nudged them out of the room, indifferent to Mary Margaret’s screams, and prodded them forward. He took them to a small room Neal had never seen before, lined with top hats.

“Sit down, Neal,” Jefferson ordered. “Hand me that cell phone in your pocket. And keep quiet.” Neal obeyed, regretfully.

“I don’t know what you think you’re doing,” Emma burst out. “But if you hurt my friend, I swear I’ll make you regret it.”

“Hurt her? I’m saving her life.” Jefferson said softly, walking towards her not unlike a lion stalks its prey.

“How do you figure that?” Emma demanded.

“Don’t play stupid. We all know what happens when people try to leave Storybrooke.”

And in that moment, it hit Neal like a ton of bricks. Jefferson knew. He knew everything. He knew about the curse, he knew who he was, where he came from…did he know about Neal?! Did he know who his father was?!

“The curse is keeping us all trapped,” Jefferson murmured. “All except you two.”

“Have you been reading Henry’s book?” Emma said perplexed.

“Henry and his book of stories,” Jefferson mused. “The ones that Emma chooses to ignore—but Neal pays very close attention to. Ever wonder why?”

Neal’s fists clenched. Emma glanced at Neal in bewilderment.

“For the last twenty-eight years,” Jefferson began to circle the room, like a vulture, keeping the pistol aimed high. “I’ve been stuck in this house. Day after day, always the same. Until one night, you two roll into town, the clock ticks, and things start to change. You see…I know what you refuse to acknowledge, Emma. You’re special. You brought something precious to Storybrooke—magic.”

“You’re insane,” Emma said flatly.

“Interesting,” Jefferson bared his teeth. “Perhaps you’re the one who’s mad. After all, what’s crazier than seeing and not believing? Ask Neal. He knows.”

Without waiting for this, however, Jefferson took Emma by the shoulders and sat her down at the table across from Neal. The table was littered with sewing supplies, pins and pincushions, scissors of all sizes, scraps of fabric.

Jefferson bent and rested his chin on Emma’s head, staring at Neal blankly. “She’s the only one that can do it, Neal,” His voice was barely above a whisper. “She’s going to get it to work.”

And in that moment, Neal realized who he was.

The Mad Hatter.

“The hats…” Neal sucked in his breath. Magic hats that could open a portal.

“The tea!” Emma exclaimed. “Your psychotic behavior. You think you’re the Mad Hatter.”

Jefferson clearly did not like to be called that. “My name is Jefferson.”

“Okay,” Emma set down the piece of fabric and took a deep breath. “You’ve clearly glommed onto our kid Henry’s thing. They’re just stories. The Mad Hatter is in Alice in Wonderland—a book. A book I actually read!”

“Stories…” Jefferson smiled a little. “Stories. Tell me, Neal. What do you think of these stories? In high school, you studied the Civil War, yes? You learned that in perchance a book? And what are storybooks based on? Imagination? Where does that come from? Neal—where do you come from?!”

“Jefferson,” Neal said in a low voice. “You can’t—you—”

“This is it!” Emma gestured around her. “This is the real world.”

“A real world,” Jefferson corrected. He leaned towards her, across the table. “How arrogant are you to think yours is the only one? There are infinite more. You have to open your mind. They touch one another, pressing up in a long line of lands. Each just as real as the last. All have their own rules. Some have magic, some don’t. And some need magic. Like this one. And that’s where you come in.”

Jefferson pointed the blade of the scissors towards Emma while keeping the pistol firmly trained on Neal. “You, Spot, and Neal are not leaving here until you make my hat. Until you get it to work.”

The scissors clattered as he dropped them in front of Emma. Both she and Neal jumped at the noise. Jefferson smirked a little at their tenseness and spun around towards Neal.

“I truly did not want you involved,” He said apologetically. “Believe that, at least. I know who you’re hiding from. And I know why. But I have to get my daughter back.”

“What?” The color drained from Neal’s face.

“The curse,” Jefferson told him. “He did this to find you, you know. To make all of us feel what he felt. Like everyone else, what I love has been ripped from me. Look.”

He gestured for Emma to go to the telescope. She peered through but Neal remained rooted to the spot. He did this to find you, you know. To make all of us feel what he felt.

“Her name is Grace,” The pain in Jefferson’s voice was palpable. “Here it’s Paige. But it’s Grace. My Grace. Do you have any idea what it’s like to watch her day in and day out, happy, with a new family? With a new father?”

“You think she’s your daughter?” Emma asked.

“I don’t think, I know. I remember. She has no idea who I am. Our life together, where we come from. I do. That’s my curse.” Jefferson turned towards Neal. He reached a shaking hand out and ran his fingers through Neal’s curls.

“Do you understand now?” Jefferson asked quietly. “Do you understand what he’s done to me? To all of us?”

“What—what who’s done?!” Emma asked, her eyes flitting between Jefferson and Neal nervously.

“Jefferson,” Neal’s mouth was dry. “I—I’m so sorry. I didn’t—I didn’t ask for this. I didn’t want him to find me. I never did. I just—”

“I know,” Jefferson nodded frantically. “I know. You and I are the same, Neal. We will do whatever it takes to get our family back.”

“That’s why you want me to make the hat.”

They both turned to look at Emma. Her expression was vulnerable.

“You just want to take Grace home,” She exhaled slowly. “To your world.”

Jefferson stared at her. “You believe?”

“If what you say is true, that woman in the other room is my mother. And I want to believe that more than anything in the world. So maybe you’re right. Maybe I need to open myself up more. Maybe, if I want magic, I have to start believing.” Emma stepped towards Jefferson.

“So you’re—you’re going to help me? You can get it to work?” Jefferson was half-begging. His voice trembled and Neal’s heart broke for him.

This was all because of him. The curse, Storybrooke, all of it—all of it had been done because Rumplestiltskin was trying to hunt him down.

It was all his fault.

Emma swallowed hard. “I can try.”

He backed away and turned to grab the hat Emma had haphazardly stitched together. But as he did so, Emma seized the telescope and knocked him unconscious. He fell to the floor instantly.

“Crazy son of a bitch!” Emma burst out and snatched the gun. “Neal, are you okay?!”

“I’m fine,” Neal stood up and embraced her. “Are you? Did he do anything to you?”

“He drugged me, but that’s it. You got here before anything else could happen. C’mon, we’ve gotta get out of here!” She grabbed his arm and tried to pull him along with her, but Neal stopped short.

“You get Mary Margaret out of here,” Neal told her. “I’ll keep an eye on the Mad Hatter here. Then come back here and arrest this asshole.”

“You sure?” Emma handed him the gun.

“Don’t worry about it,” Neal said grimly. “I’d like to have a few words with him in any case.”

Emma nodded curtly. “Here. Time him up.” She handed him scraps of fabric that would do as light ropes. Neal bent down and tied Jefferson’s wrists together tightly. The Mad Hatter’s eyes flickered slightly and Neal kicked him in the gut for good measure.

“I won’t be gone more than fifteen minutes,” Emma promised. “I have to get Mary Margaret back to her cell before her arraignment.”

“I got him,” Neal said, still staring at Jefferson’s unconscious form. “Go.”

“Neal…” Emma hesitated. “I just—about what happened the other night—”

He gave her a half-smile. “You know, I was all worried about bringing it up with you because you had so much going on. And now you’re bringing it up right after you’ve been drugged and tied up?”

“Okay, fair enough,” Emma coughed. “Raincheck?”

“Raincheck. Get out of here.”

XXXX

When Jefferson awoke, he was tied to a chair facing Neal, a gun pointed directly at his head.

“Let’s review,” Neal said in a dangerous voice. “You hired me so you could keep a close watch on Emma and figure out her movements. You drugged the mother of my child and tied her up. You terrorized her mother and tied her up. And you tried to force her to send you back to the Enchanted Forest. Am I missing anything?”

Jefferson spat a wad of blood on the ground. “Neal…”

“Trust me, I sympathize,” The dangerous glint in Neal’s gaze faded slightly. “I get the desire to get your kid back at any cost. But you cross a goddamn line when you endanger my family.”

“You have to let me go,” Jefferson pleaded. “Before she gets back.”

Neal laughed harshly. “Oh yeah? And why the hell should I do that?”

“Because I know where Belle is.”

#Swanfire #Swan Thief

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