#debating whether or not i want to continue because so far it’s only given me more anxiety

[saturnvs]

equine therapy starts again today for the first time since … october? nervous 🫠

[gin-juice-tonic]

Hello. It's me again. I'm sure you've realized by now what this type of introduction to a post is leading into. I'm going to bring up another page in the bill book. This entry is going to be less about "proving" anything, but rather it's just something I'd like to discuss. (Also just a warning, this one ends up a bit long due to how many photos are included!)

As I have said before. I had many many thoughts, and I am liable to talk about them until they're all talked out. I want to focus on a single page again (Or I guess, a single double page).

Sorry for the kinda small image here, but don't worry. I'll point out the part I want to talk about.

What I find strange about these pages in particular, aside from the fact that it starts to become written like some sort of noir novel and that Bill has chosen to speak like a femme-fatale, is the new idea it suggests to us:

Bill at some point told Ford he was from another dimension.

I say "at some point" because Ford doesn't react to the idea like this is new information here. Why do I find that strange? Well, for one thing, there's never anything that would indicate Ford knew this pre-portal.

To start, we know that Bill introduces himself to Ford as "a Muse"

Notice the way Ford speaks about him. "From a higher plane, divine, otherworldly". He makes some guesses on the second page (spirit, alien, dream, etc), but nothing to indicate they've discussed the whole other-dimension thing yet. Of course, this is still early, so let's skip further ahead.

Here's where we start talking about other dimensions.

Bill has told his "weirdness dimension" lie to Ford, but there's no implication that he himself is from this dimension. And not to mention, this dimension hasn't been destroyed, so naturally it cannot be the one he talks about in the Bill Book pages.

Regardless, Bill is still being referred to as a divine thing, unknowable and even possibly not real. Safe to say he isn't inter-dimensional yet, so let's continue.

(this section has been edited from its original wording)

Here Fiddleford and his idiosyncrasies enter the fray, and Ford debates telling him. Fiddleford is aware they're building a portal to another dimension, so it would not be that far of a stretch in that vein for Ford to also explain that Bill himself is from one. But Ford's attitude toward the situation veers towards the less scientific. Ford still considers Bill to be something divine, and is worried Fiddleford would think black magic is happening.

Worrying that Fiddleford would think he's gone mad is one thing, but the emphasis on black magic and fiddlefords superstitions strike me as odd.

I understand there are likely several varying reasons why Ford wouldn't want to tell Fiddleford about Bill, even if Ford DID know he was from a different dimension, however:

If Ford had something to suggest Bill's essence was more scientific in nature, I.E. him being from another dimension himself, I think he would've put that into consideration in that when deciding whether to reveal him to Fiddleford, or at the very least would've given up the emphasis on his superstitious nature.

I'm not trying to say he would've actually fully revealed it to Fiddleford if this were the case, but I think the thought process around the concept of doing so would be different.

.

We're closing in on the portal test now. Ford refers to him here as a "non corporeal entity". He is non corporeal so long as he exists only in the astral plane... but is that what Ford is talking about? Or does he believe Bill has only ever existed in the mindscape? Does he know yet? I don't think this page actually includes much of an answer, I just figured it should be included.

The next-next page does have Ford cheekily refer to him as "imaginary" though...

Fairly soon after this, the portal incident and the betrayal happens. Could it be possible that somewhere within these pages, Bill spilt his home dimension backstory? I'm still inclined to think not.

These questions have no definitive answer, but I am led to wonder:

1) Bill's whole dynamic with Ford is that of a "Muse" inspiring intelligent minds throughout history, wouldn't the reveal of him being from another dimension call this dynamic into question?

2) If Bill is something from another dimension, wouldn't asking Ford to build a portal to a dimension totally-not-at-all-related-to-him become suspicious? Would Ford not question his motives at that point?

(A later edit: As has been pointed out in the reblogs, some of what I have discussed thus far fails to take into account the mental state Ford could be in due to Bill's abuse/manipulations. Expecting perfect logic and reasoning from him like the two questions above are asking for may not be fair. I am leaving them in this post so the aforementioned reblogs continue to make sense, but again, how his prolonged abuse factors into his logic and decision-making should be taken into consideration.)

.

.

I have just a few more post-portal pages to show to continue my long winded discussion with as well.

The pages about Exwhylia read a bit weirdly, admittedly. The first page Ford states he thought this was Bill's birthplace, the second page he states he believes Bill came from somewhere similar but was mysteriously destroyed.

If Ford thought this 2-D dimension had been reduced to an atom before he got there, how could he have planned to go? And I should hardly call being destroyed by a monster a "mysterious" method of destroying. Whatever the explanation for the way these are written is, I don't think they read like Bill has ever spoken to Ford about his home dimension.

Additionally, he mentions his "quest to defeat Bill" is what led him here, which I feel implies he learned of this place after being portaled.

I wish I had a good closer for this mini-essay, but the questions I asked above the Exwhylia section were originally supposed to be it. I don't believe Bill had told Ford about his dimension. That's the end of the sentence.

MAJOR ADDENDUM:

I can't believe I missed this (I can believe it) but.. In the book of Bill, Ford refers to Bill as "extradimensional" after their very first meeting!

Pinpointing the answer to my timeline question supposedly to this exact moment. In my opinion, if you combine this with everything I've mentioned above, no part of this idea from the book of bill makes any sense at all. You might remember at the beginning of this post, Ford guesses at what type of creature Bill is... two years after this last page here was supposed to have been written.

Additionally, if he had known there was an "extradimensional" creature in gravity falls at this point in time, I should hardly think it would've taken him two whole years after that to think of the idea that the Falls' weirdness may come from out of our dimension! (Not to mention in J3 he tells us the idea was told to him directly from Bill. Two years elapsed between these conversations? Knowing Ford, not likely. Again, even if Bill somehow did avoid telling him that whole time, I think Ford very well could've figured it out on his own by then.)

[avayarising]

The Batfam Death Project Introduction

I’m working on a project to find and list every time each member of the Batfam has experienced death, either through dying or by visiting a world of the dead.

Why?

I was curious because I kept finding incidences of DC heroes dying and coming back to life, and the Batfam in particular (though maybe that’s just because that’s where I started looking), and I wanted to know how much there was of this. Jason’s death is the one everyone makes a fuss of, but there are plenty of others and I wanted to know just how many.

And, coming at it partially from the DPxDC side, I wanted to know exactly how liminal the Bats are.

And the answer is: very.

Scope

For this project I’m looking at all deaths of the core Batfamily: that’s Bruce, Dick, Jason, Tim, Cass, Damian, and Alfred; I’m also including Steph, Barbara, Duke, and Kate. I’m not including more peripheral, associate or occasional bat-vigilantes such as Jean-Paul or Helena, nor other members of the Justice League, though I am aware of at least some deaths for many of them. (I could perhaps be persuaded to expand the project…)

The scope includes only the main universe (Prime Earth, New Earth, or Earth-0). It covers all eras from pre-Crisis to the present day, within the main timeline. It does not include elseworlds, imaginary stories, or alternative universes. For example, it does not include deaths and undeaths in DCeased, DC versus Vampires, or Injustice. It considers only comics, not movies, TV shows, radio plays, or other media. My goal is that it should at least be arguable, for any given character, that the same person has experienced all their death events in succession.

Definition of death experience

A character is considered dead if they are depicted or declared dead on panel (and this is not contradicted). They are also considered dead if they have no heartbeat, have no cerebral activity, or require CPR.

The death doesn’t have to be long to be included – brief flatlining counts. I’m including a note of the rough length of time the character is dead for each incident, at least in terms of order of magnitude (minutes, hours, days…).

I’m also including instances where a character is healed in a Lazarus Pit while dying or mortally wounded – in other words, where they would have died very shortly without the intervention of the Pit.

I debated whether or not to include instances of what the comics call ‘brain death’, where there is no cerebral activity, even if autonomous functions continue. In real life, my understanding is that a declaration of death for lack of brain activity requires brainstem death, where even autonomous functions are lost. But I decided in the end to include them, because in both cases where this occurs (both to Bruce) they are referred to on-panel as ‘clinical death’.

In addition to the above, I’m also separately keeping track of any visits to any afterlife or realm of the dead where the character doesn’t have to die to go there (summoning, portal, etc.).

Preliminary results

Bruce dies early and dies often. So far I have several dozen deaths for Bruce, in seventeen separate incidents.

His kids have a more reasonable 2–5 deaths each.

Duke is the only member of the Batfam (core or adjunct) whom I haven’t found any verifiable deaths for. Yet.

Deaths have been getting more frequent over the years, and they’re all getting pretty blasé about it.

Next steps

I’m going to write a post for each character listing and summarising their deaths, with volume and issue references. I’ll then dive into more detail in individual posts for some of the more interesting (to me) deaths and revivals. I’ll create a masterpost so you can keep track of them, and link it here.

Please send me asks!

Acknowledgements

Huge thanks are due to @lynzine and @zahri-melitor for helping and encouraging me with this project, letting me rant at them about this project and the comics I’ve read for it, and finding and suggesting deaths and potential deaths for me to look at. Without your encouragement I would have given up long ago.

The Batfam Death Project Masterpost

[jackactuallywrites]

Fuck, Marry, Caught

Pairing: Kyle ‘Gaz’ Garrick x female reader

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Spanking, punishment

Summary: You write about how hot you think Gaz is, he finds out and punishes you for it (sexily obvs)

Notes: Apparently Gaz really inspires me because Lord the word count!

Word Count: 3,542

ao3 link

Special thanks to @xxven for making me a trope wheel to spin 😘

Obsession didn’t seem word enough to describe how you felt about Kyle ‘Gaz’ Garrick. You craved him, a deep yearning in the pit of your stomach, a desperate need, the way your lungs needed oxygen.

There was absolutely no question about whether you would ever reveal this desperation to the man himself; as a lowly Corporal, the sergeant was your superior, so not only would it be considered improper just in terms of fraternisation within the military, but in terms of rank. Highly improper, and yet that only served to make it more delicious to you, daydreaming about how you would have to hide your illicit affair with him, hooking up in the broom closets, in the corners of the air hangers, in every slightly hidden place across the base. It was this that kept you going through the duller days of service, an impure fantasy to titillate your mind when you were doing pointless busy work. That, and the fact that you always had your equally delusional friends to share your dreams of desperation and depravity with.

Like always, you had found yourself huddled up with the two of them in the corner of the airbase, the temperature in there always being a few degrees cooler than the heat outside, and you had found a loose bit of tarpaulin to bundle up underneath your heads as a makeshift pillow, allowing you to stare up at the sloping, ridged metal of the ceiling as you chatted. The topic, as usual, was the hotly debated rating of your superior officers.

Josh was the most recently outraged, his eyes wide and unbelieving as he stared at Tess, “You’re telling me you’re putting Ghost above Soap? You can’t even see his face!” Tess smiled and shrugged, “Oh, but isn’t that the appeal? If you don’t know what he looks like under the mask, you can imagine anything.” You had to agree with Tess; you understood the appeal of a masked man, especially a classic tall, dark and silent one like Ghost, but he still didn’t cinch the number one spot for you. You propped yourself up on your elbows so you could look at the other two, “I can’t believe that you two are sleeping on Gaz. I mean, have you seen that man?” You shook your head, “I mean, fuck that, you don’t even have to see him, have you heard him? I swear, that man has a voice like pure silky caramel. And by God, I want to taste it.” Josh shrugged, acquiescing to your views, “No, you know what? I can see it. He really is gorgeous.”

You’d been pushing the superiority of Gaz above the other soldiers for ages, and at long last, Joshua had finally given in and accepted your point of view. “Fucking finally. You have all been blind to that for far too long.” Tess rolled her eyes, “My God, you’re still on it with the Gaz infatuation?” You grin, “When am I ever off it? The man is a Greek god.” Tess snorted at you, “Like you’ve ever seen him naked.” You raised your eyebrows, wagging your finger at her to silence her before looking pointedly over at Josh. He sighed a little bashfully, “Well, I have seen him in the changing rooms. And Birdie isn’t wrong. Greek. God.” You grinned over at Tess, “See? That’s proven. Gaz is gorgeous. I don’t think anybody’s ever seen Ghost's body. That’s all conjecture.” Tess shrugged, “You have your fantasy, and I have mine.”

Now that you finally had Josh on your side, you brought out your little notepad from one of the many pockets, as well as a little pencil, “Now that the ayes officially have it-“ Tess snorted, “What are you, speaker of the fucking house?” You continued on as though she hadn’t interrupted, “Now that the ayes have it, we can finally put Gaz at the top of our list.” Josh gave out a lazy whoop, and you wrote out the name Sergeant Kyle Garrick at the top of the note, "And we've all agreed that Soap is next on the list, right?" Both Josh and Tess nodded; that much was absolute in your little group, and so you added Sergeant John MacTavish.

Josh leaned over to look at your notepad and scoffed at the simple way you'd written both names. "Really, Birdie? Your lack of flair consistently disappoints me." You rolled your eyes at him, "Alright then, you write it." He took your notepad, then took the pencil and wielded it with a flourish, spinning it between his fingers before he wrote in a far more elaborate script, vocalising the words as he wrote, "The Official List of the Hottest Soldiers." Tess snorted, "You make it sound so proper. Like we're not just thirsting over mean we can't have." You gestured to the notepad, "Add on that Corporal Waters is being a huge sourpuss about it." Josh grinned, writing what you dictated in the margins, "Corporal Waters' dissidence has been officially noted by the honourable Corporal Mills." “Note how shredded he is! And how that voice would sound in your ear when he’s-“

The grinding sound of the large hangar doors snapped you out of your revelry, and the three of you shot up from where you'd been laid, quickly getting to your feet lest you be caught slacking by any superior officers. Thankfully, you all knew the quickest route out of the hangar, scrambling after each other to escape the approaching footsteps, making sure you didn't leave a scrap of fabric that bore your name behind. It was all a well-rehearsed routine, yet there had been one fatal flaw—the notebook. You might have noticed it if you weren't in such a hurry to leave, yet one kick from Josh pushed it under the tarp you'd all been using as a pillow, and as it was out of sight, it was out of mind.

Unfortunately, it wasn’t out of your mind for long. The very second you’d stopped to catch your breath, a mile away from the hangar, you realised your fatal flaw. Your name was on that paper. Joshua had written it, and Tess had her name noted in dissidence, but yours had been credited as though you were the sole author. All you could do was pray they wouldn’t look under the tarp.

Two weeks later, you’d put that incident to the back of your mind, returning to your usual habits of daydreaming about Gaz, idly imagining what his body would look like in the shower, the droplets of water on his muscles, the dark curls that trailed down from his stomach that Joshua had spoken of. A perfect, delectable thought that kept you company as you worked in the tedium of logistics, endlessly tapping in numbers onto the spreadsheet as though it really mattered how many biscuits were currently in storage. What you would have given to have Josh or Tess come in to make a note of whatever they’d used during their daily mechanical duties. In fact, it was so dry you would have taken any grunt coming in to break up the day.

It was clear that someone up there had a sense of humour. Not a second after you’d pleaded for something to break up the monotony, the man himself, Sergeant Garrick, had come through your door.

You’d been on the base through several firefights, listening to rockets fired and praying that they wouldn’t hit anyone, but this seemed to cinch the top spot for the most afraid you’d ever been. He was here, standing before you, his warm brown eyes looking you over, and you had to question, did he know?

“Corporal Mills.” The way your name sounded pouring out of his mouth sounded like pure treacle, as though he’d put emphasis on sounding as alluring as possible. Suddenly, it seemed as though your mouth had been filled with sand, your tongue dry, your brain spinning as you took a second to reboot your consciousness. “Sergeant. How can I help you?” “I believe I’ve found something of yours.”

Your heart seemed to drop out of your chest as you saw him bring out your notebook, your name written in block letters on the very last page. Gaz seemed to notice the fear in your eyes, and a very smug smile spread across his lips. “Something to tell me, Corporal?” You blinked, trying to think of a quick lie on the spot, coming up with the laziest answer, “Is that mine? I’m pretty sure mine is in the storeroom somewhere. That one must be someone else’s.” He laughed, “You’re telling me a soldier in the Royal Logistics Corps misplaced something? Isn’t keeping track of things your whole job?” You gave him a slightly bashful smile, “Nobody’s perfect.” He raised a brow, tilting his head at you, “So I should track down Corporal Waters and reprimand them?”

You might have been a liar and somewhat of a degenerate, but you were never one to betray a friend, so you pretended to take a closer look at the notebook as if you’d only recognised it at that moment, “Oh, that is mine.” As you reached out to take it, Gaz pulled it away from him, tutting at you, “I’m sorry; did you think you were getting it back with absolutely no punishment?” Of course, you’d expected that much; superior officers always loved to take the opportunity to dole out absurd punishment. You dropped your head, hoping to look regretful enough that he wouldn’t be too harsh, “I guess I do deserve that. I’ll accept anything you deem appropriate recourse.” He trailed his fingers in a circle on your notepad, “Anything?”

It was impossible to know where you were, just imagining the sultry look in his eyes or the practical purr in his voice. Yet, you weren’t about to make a fool of yourself by making assumptions based on nothing more than endless fantasies, so you chose to play it safe. “Whatever you see fit, sir.” He smiled again, “Good. Come with me.” “Right now?” He raised a brow at you, leaning in closer and lowering his voice, “Unless you’d rather have a traditional military punishment?” It seemed as though you’d fallen out of usual life and into some sort of wondrous fantasy, and you weren’t about to waste your one chance with Kyle Garrick. “No, sir.” He smiled, his eyes twinkling, “Come along then, Corporal.”

Your superiors would undoubtedly be absolutely appalled at the speed with which you abandoned your post, yanking down the shutters in your eagerness to trot after Gaz like an obedient little dog. He seemed to know the quietest corridors, as you didn’t pass a single other soul, making you feel all the more like a dirty little secret of his, not that you minded in the slightest. Your mind was focused on little else but the prospect of what pleasure awaited you, your heart thudding loudly in your chest, already feeling the excitement building in your stomach, trailing down between your legs. Perhaps you were a little overly optimistic, but you couldn’t help but let your mind run wild, desperate for even the slightest bit of physical contact from him.

At long last, Gaz stopped in front of a locked wooden door, rummaging in his pocket for a key. He unlocked it for you, opening the door and standing aside as he waited for you to enter, which you did abruptly, barely holding on to your last shred of patience. You could hear Gaz’s huff of amusement, no doubt amused by your unabashed desire for him, and he locked the door behind him, turning around to face you.

“So.” He began, and you sat on the edge of his desk, trying not to seem too desperate, but Gaz clicked his tongue at you, “What do you think you’re doing?” You looked at him questioningly, “Sitting on your desk?” He tutted, shaking his head, “I don’t think so. This is supposed to be a punishment, is it not? Bend over the desk.”

For a second, you weren’t entirely sure you’d heard him correctly, your brain seeming to short-circuit for a second. Gaz raised his brows, “Every second is another added to your punishment.” You hesitated, but you obeyed, turning around and bending over the desk, letting your chest rest on the flat wooden surface, stretching your arms out in front of you, your fingers clinging onto the far edge. Gaz approached you from behind, though you couldn’t see him, only hear his footsteps grow closer, the anticipation beginning to build between your legs. Suddenly, you felt his hand on your lower back, trailing across to your hip, his fingers reaching around to find the button of your trousers, deftly unbuttoning them with one hand, then tugging down your zipper. He bent over you, sending a shock up your spine as you felt the length of his hardness press up against your ass, his chest against your back as he leant down to murmur in your ear, his other hand bracing on the desk, “Safeword is pineapple, darling. Nod if you understand.” You nodded, and he straightened up, tugging down your trousers until they fell around your ankles. His hands shifted to your lower back again, starting on their slow path over your arse and briefly pausing between your legs long enough to stroke the entirety of your slit over the thin cloth of your underwear before resting on your ass.

“I think ten smacks is about right for misplacing personal equipment, don’t you?” You weren’t about to disagree, giving him another silent nod. He trailed his finger up and down the soft skin of your behind before bringing his hand down in a swift smack, sending pain and pleasure radiating through your core, and you couldn’t help but let out a little whimper, seeming to have discovered something new about yourself. His other hand trailed over your hip and down between your legs as the other one caressed your ass, his fingers beginning to rub you over your pants. The moment you relaxed into pure pleasure, he brought his hand down in a swift smack again, jolting you forward on the table. Your pleasure was more tangible now, and you groaned into the hard wooden surface, your fingers clinging onto the side for dear life as his fingers started moving against your more sensitive clit, his hands coming down against your arse twice in quick succession.

“You’ll have to beg for these next ones, sweetheart.” At this point, you weren’t going to resist anything Gaz said; any remaining sense of embarrassment completely vanished in the face of your desperation, your voice coming out as an almost unrecognisable plead, “Please.” His thumb stroked tenderly over the slightly sore skin of your arse, “Please, what?” You bit your lip, “Please, hit me again.” He obliged you, hitting you sharply, yet now his fingers were breaching the edge of your underwear and tugging them to the side, his fingers soft against your sensitive skin, caressing you gently before he slowly began to slip his fingers inside you, his thumb resting on your clit. You could feel yourself growing wetter as he sank his finger into you completely, and yet it was missing something, even as you were drowning in pleasure. Without prompting, you led out another pleading whine, “Please, hit me again.”

Gaz obliged you eagerly, giving you a swift smack, his finger beginning to pump in and out of you, his thumb beginning to move in circles around your clit, slowly setting you alight with pleasure, your hips beginning to buck back against his finger. You didn’t need to ask for another one, as already he was bringing his hand down against your increasingly tender behind, jerking you forwards on the desk again, his fingers slightly coming out of you, and then he grabbed your hip and pulled you back, now sliding two of his fingers inside you, gently stretching you open. Your body was practically desperate for him now, and you needily pressed back against him.

“You’re just desperate for me, aren’t you?” He purred down at you, his hand moving from your ass to your lower back, caressing you through your shirt, and you whimpered on the desk, beginning to lose those tiny shreds of composure you had left as you begged, “Please.” His hand spread over your lower back, pinning you down to the desk, and his voice became slightly strained, “Not yet.” He smacked your ass again, now pressing a third finger into your needy pussy, your body needing no further stretching at this point, completely relaxed and open for him. He left out a soft growl, leaning down over you, his chest pressed against your back, pinning you down as he reached over you to pull out a drawer, rummaging inside before you heard the sound of crinkling foil, your breathing quickening as you realised what he had brought out. Both of his hands briefly left your body as he quickly undid his trousers, and you heard the tearing of the foil packet, your body dripping with excitement as you felt him press up against you once again, one hand on your ass, the other guiding his dick down to your sopping wet pussy, the tip at your entrance, piquing your desperation as you felt him press into you, the pressure slowly building before he began to sink into you, one inch at a time, every single one more pleasurable than the one before.

Your nails dug into the wooden desk hard enough to crack the veneer, a soft moan escaping your lips as you felt him fill you up entirely. Gaz had been in complete control the entire time, yet now he was beginning to let out quiet moans himself, his other hand shifting away from his dick to your hip, gripping you tightly as he finally bottomed out inside you. He let out a short breath, rubbing his thumb over your hip, “Fuck me, you feel good.”

Words were beyond you now, only able to focus on the feeling of him inside you, pushing yourself against him, and he rewarded you with a sharp smack, sending you forward on the desk, yet he quickly yanked you back into his cock, not allowing you a second to recover from the sensations. His other hand shifted around from your hip, underneath your pants and back to your clit again, two fingers beginning to rub in a small circle as he slowly began to fuck you, small thrusts at first, then growing longer and more forceful. You could feel the pleasure building up inside you, and you bit your lip, arching your back as much as you could on the desk, and Gaz needed little encouragement, fucking you harder as he smacked your arse again, mixing pain and pleasure so tantalisingly, your body beginning to tighten as your orgasm approached, and you begged him, “Please, don’t stop Gaz, please.”

Gaz’s hand quickened in rubbing circles around your clit, and you pushed back against him to try and feel as much of him as you could, and he rewarded you with another spank as he fucked you more ferociously, coaxing your orgasm out of you until it hit you hard, crashing over you in waves, yet he didn’t stop, smacking your ass again as he drove himself into you over and over until finally, he came in a single long stroke, gripping your hip hard enough to leave bruises as he leant down on top of you, resting on your back, his breath heavy in your ear.

The two of you stayed like that for some time, allowing your bodies to come down from the high still pressed together. Gaz was the one to move first, lifting himself off of you and gently pulling out, his hands trailing down over your back as he did so. Your brain quietly came back into control of your body, though you weren’t all that keen to get up, your legs still feeling rather jelly-like. Gaz placed a box of tissues in front of you, allowing you to take one and give yourself a quick clean-up, deciding that you’d shower when you returned to your barracks. You tossed the tissues in the waste bin, then hoisted your trousers back up, standing up from where you’d been sprawled over the desk. Gaz had already returned to his intimidatingly pristine self, yet he looked at you kindly, a slight smirk on his face, “Well. I didn’t expect to be so tempted. Or for you to be so loud.” He grinned at you, “I shouldn’t keep you. Logistics keep the base running.”

You had no problem departing quickly, desperate to update Tess and Josh on this new unexpected chapter of your life, and you nodded, throwing him a slight smirk, “Remind me to lose my notebook more often.” Gaz chuckled, unlocking the door for you and peering around to ensure there were no stragglers in the hallway. As you left, he smacked your ass again, and you groaned, already tempted to go back into his office but knowing that your duties -and gossip- awaited.

[bengiyo]

Hidden Agenda: Zo Experienced The Knowing

I was tagged by @respectthepetty this morning in her post about Zo and how much damage Puen did to him. At the end of the post she mentioned that Zo probably Knew who he was this whole time. I want to talk about the timing of this reveal, what it means for this kind of show, and how I feel about it.

I have admittedly been struggling with this show. I think Dunk is often a little hard for me to read, and I often wish that he hadn’t been given such an internal character to play. However, I think the team may be using that to their advantage to cloud our ability to read Zo. 

Zo began the series in a debate with Joke about how people need to be honest about their feelings before going into a relationship with someone, and he’s been nervous to approach Nita. We’ve also seen him showing dismay about possibly being a bad mentor to Pok, along with his general reticence to Joke’s advances. I think I’ve decided that I’m okay with the show recontextualizing much of what we’ve seen before, but I don’t generally like it. Sure, it rewards those who pay close attention, but there’s too much going on for me to do an extensive rewatch to see those scenes again in a new light. However, I like it for queer reasons. 

What fascinates me about our sudden reread of Zo as a Known Gay (placeholder term I use for everyone; Zo hasn’t identified himself; let me have fun) is we watched Zo go through this during their Chiang Khan trip when he realized Pok was seeing Jeng. At that time I only read Zo as concerned with being read as homophobic by his junior who couldn’t come out to him, but now it’s even sadder because Zo was not only concerned about being seen as homophobic he was also not being seen as a member of the community. 

The constant concern he expresses is that he’ll make people uncomfortable. He’s afraid to approach Nita, and has a huge panic when a not-date doesn’t exactly go over well with her. I thought this was part of his confused feelings for Joke, but it’s also about how Zo doesn’t trust himself in romance because of what Puen did. I feel especially sad for Zo because Puen messed him up so badly that he can’t even pursue an opposite-sex romance with confidence either. I felt like a part of Zo hoped that things would be easier if there wasn’t a gay component to the romance and yet he’s still feeling weird and uncertain.

As for whether Zo suffered The Knowing, I am not sure how far back Zo Knew. I can’t tell from his interactions with his mom, but it’s clear from his scenes with Puen and the matter-of-fact way he describes what happened to Joke that he had put a lot of thought into his feelings for Puen at the time. So, because of the way Puen’s actions continue to impact Zo, he goes on the board.

I'm at least relieved that as @justafriend-ql pointed out in her reblog that confirming that Puen did like him, and it wasn't all in Zo's head, allowed him to finally enjoy a moment with a guy he likes and who clearly likes him.

[anniegetyourbubblegum]

I keep seeing posts from people in the US debating whether to vote for Biden in their upcoming elections to stop Trump from winning again or to punish the democrats for aiding Israel in the genocide of Palestine.

I'm argentinian and as far as I'm concerned, you should vote for whichever candidate you think will benefit you more, because you're from the US and that's all it's good for. The rest of the world will continue to suffer at your hands no matter what. Let me explain.

Democrats and republicans are not a representation of left and right wing politics: both parties are on the right side of the spectrum, only the GOP is more honest about it.

Republicans, as right wing parties do, run on promises of austerity, reducing taxes and being tough on crime. Democrats run promising to use tax money to ease your life: affordable healthcare, education and housing, all guaranteed so you can live the life of a first world citizen.

And then, they don't deliver.

You still have school shootings, massive incarceration, corruption in all levels of government, and the poorest pay a higher proportion of taxes than the richest. Healthcare, education and housing are extremely expensive and often require people to get into heavy debt to afford to have their most basic needs met, and that's only possible if you have good credit.

It's a reductive analysis for the sake of brevity, but you get the gist. The point is that having you be poor and afraid is the goal: it's a feature, not a bug.

You want to go to college? You need to buy a house? You want to start a family? Well, the military complex needs bodies! The US has far too many enemies to their way of life, so they'll need people to defend it! In exchange, they'll "guarantee" just enough money that you won't be destitute.

The US spends the most amount of money on their military in the world, by a long shot. To justify spending that kind of money, you HAVE to have wars. To have wars, you need enemies.

So, you get propaganda. "Muslims are extremists and hate our way of life." "Latin americans want to come to our country and steal our jobs." "China and Russia are communist countries that are waiting to destroy us." And you gobble it up.

You love it so much. It's in your news, in your videogames, in your movies and TV series and comic books. So, when they ask you to fight, you go running! You'll get some money out of it and you'll get to live your life the way you were promised. Sure, PTSD from the horrors is a given, but there's pills for that! And award winning movies about how difficult it is to go to war! It's all covered.

So the small, poor countries that you invade lose their money, natural resources, and their sovereignty but HEY, you brought democracy there! And the US is protected from this many enemies! Mission accomplished, right?

Well, as a citizen of a third world country whose current president is an insane pawn of the GOP, I'd like to say fuck you. He was placed so that the US could take our recently discovered lithium, and you'll get it. Enjoy your shitty iPhone 5000 I guess. It'll come at the small price of the hunger of my countrymen, but since Twitter user dan91883719 says argentinians all descend from escaped nazis, I guess it's alright.

Israel has killed Palestinians and illegally expanded its borders for over 70 years. Both democrats and republicans have sent aid and weapons to make this possible. It's in the US best interests to have conflict in the Middle East and have an ally control the area. Israel is a feature, not a bug.

And those of you who vote blue? You're trapped. Even if you know it's shit, you're unable to organize. Instead of rallying to form a new party, or a at least get a better candidate, you keep voting bad instead of worse and pat yourselves on the back for a job well done. Democrats are well aware of this and that's why they run on platforms that promise to make your life better and then sit back and say "our hands are tied" when you lose rights.

So, if you're still doubting it, vote for whoever the fuck you want. The war machine that you call 'country' won't stop no matter who's president, because those who hold the real power are already getting exactly what they want from it. Your suffering as US citizens is just as planned as the suffering of those who live outside of it.

TL,DR: Vote for whichever candidate you feel will defend your interests best. Lord knows it won't make a lick of difference for the rest of the world, because both political parties have the same plans when it comes to foreign policy.

[dipplinduo]

I love your writing style so much!! Do you have any tips for new fic writers?

Awww, thank you so much!! <3

I feel like there's a ton of things I could say, but I'll boil down what has helped me most to keep in mind, and I'll throw in some examples from the fic to better illustrate what I'm trying to say:

Remember that you're essentially helping the reader paint an image in their head - especially with action and scenery. If you have something specific you want to convey, assume your reader has no idea what the image in your head is and put that detail in. I do that a lot with Kieran/Juliana physical interactions.

If you're writing in a character's POV, remember that you're writing in their perspective. Their perceptions and thoughts are going to be limited and colored by their own judgement (all narrators are unreliable in their own ways!!) Sometimes another way to bring a deeper connection to your character's POV is to describe things the audience already knows if it's new to the character (e.g. a recent example I have done of this in S&S D is by spending time describing Chargestone Cavern. I know the readers are familiar with it, but it was Juliana's first time experiencing it. It also showed how beaten down she was from her sickness because her scenery utterly floored her once she did register where she was. Meanwhile, Kieran is unfazed since it's more of a familiar environment & he's more numb to what's around him in general, so we don't get any of that romanticized language or much acknowledgement about the scenery at all from his POV.)

On a similar note in the unreliable narrator category: if there's something you want to convey to the audience only from a character's limited POV, make the detail suggestive enough for the character to note, but not suggestive enough to the character for them to give it much thought (i.e., maybe it happened to quickly, maybe the character doesn't know something important that is already established, maybe the character makes an incorrect judgement call, etc.) Recent examples I've done of this include Drayton kicking Crispin under the table to go along with his setup of getting Juliana to call Kieran "Kiki" (Juliana was somewhat skeptical, but didn't give it too much thought) and the end scene of Chapter 6 when Kieran encountered Ms. Briar (since Kieran was literally compromised, we only get the snippets he was mentally present for. Kieran has already been established as having a debatable visual perception given what's going on with him, and the specific detail about Ms. Briar not being around when he awoke on a Saturday in an empty office hallway was deliberately designed to rile up the audience and call for speculation. Was she really there, and left? Was she never there at all? Giving your readers the chance to theorize and make sense of breadcrumbs can give your fic more momentum and make it more enticing. Your audience will have a reason to want to continue to the next chapter because they want to know what happens! And this can also apply to fluff, btw.)

On a related, personal bias and perhaps somewhat diabolical note: I also think some of the best storytelling is a bit of a give and take. Give your audiences the expected satisfying wins at times, but also don't be afraid to cop them out and take them somewhere else than they're expecting to make a stronger or more impactful point. I love doing this (sorry not sorry ;D) - whether to make a moment more cute than you'd expect or to pull at heartstrings and create more emotional investment for a character (e.g. there was a reason we got the Kieran/Sweet Applin moment right before...welp, rather than at any other part of thus far). Mostly because I think it's a more fun emotional journey as a reader!

If your character is experiencing an emotion, don't just tell the reader that they are. Describe how that emotion manifests in them to the degree of its intensity, and remember that emotional experiences are often somatic and can look different from character to character. One technique I use to further emphasize this is to use certain diction depending on the narrator (i.e. the language used to depict Kieran's experiences of embarrassment has some differences compared to how Juliana's is described when she feels it; that being said there is deliberate overlap I put in from time to time in the way they think to show some of their likeness.)

Make sure you're having fun and writing things you're feeling passionate about! I, for one, have enjoyed doing this via interactions with readers & the community. Receiving feedback and hearing about what my audience is thinking is very helpful in both constructive and brainstorming kind of ways, and some of my favorite moments have been built around learning more about my audience/having a sense of what should be improved or expanded on. That being said, it's also important to stick to what you know you want to stick to if it's something you're confident about - even if it's different than what people might be expecting or hoping for. At the end of the day you are the writer and this is your story. You always get the final say-so. I also tend to keep this integrity in tack by limiting my awareness of what other fic writers are doing with related ideas so I don't feel unconsciously influenced in any way when I'm actively writing (I very much dislike doing this, but feel it helps me).

Wishing you the best luck in writing!! And happy to talk one on one, too. I'm no expert by any means - writing is more of a hobby and this is just some things I've learned along the way. I always appreciate learning from others too and I guarantee you that you have your own natural instincts that will be great insight for me and many others!!! <3

[rriavian]

WIP Snippet - Unofficial Business Part 2

It's been a while since I've posted any snippets on tumblr so thought I'd post this. Been ill for the past few weeks and wanted to at least do something useful today. So I'm looking at my WIPs and decided to write a bit of chapter 2 of that Corintheus sickfic I posted a while ago (link here).

-

Dream is insistent.

The Corinthian stays firm. “Just conjure it yourself.”

“No. You will make it for me.”

Now that is far different than simply calling it into being, plucking it from a human dream to settle here. Why would Dream want that? What could be gained from having it made for him? The Corinthian doesn’t know, finds his thoughts conflict—subservience, obedience and ownership, but also care, comfort, being given it—debates the risk of picking between the two potential motives. He doesn’t want to think about whether there’s anything in them that he’s willing to accept. It can be avoided entirely if he plays this right.

Perhaps he can make Dream choose instead.

“I’ll have to leave to do that.” The Corinthian muses, casual, unbothered; lazily continuing his rhythmic stroking of Dream’s hair, completing the twist into a sweet little tug, a calculated movement he ensures doesn’t seem that way. He waits, lets his words catch on Dream’s skin, allows them to sink beneath it before he continues.

“You don’t want me to leave do you?”

“I want soup.” Dream replies. 

It’s mumbled sourly against the Corinthian’s chest.

He’s not uncertain but some of that demand is swayed, still so very obstinate but this particular method of persuasion is actually working its magic. The reminder that he’d asked for this, the emphasis on touch drawing his attention to it, taking advantage of all that greed the Corinthian knows Dream keeps so well hidden. It can remain so because it’s never challenged, never denied, an appetite that only unwinds itself free to hiss and spit when it finds resistance. The Corinthian may not be able to dent Dream’s authority, may not be a match for him in a fair fight, but perhaps the King can be convinced to win a battle against himself.

It seems giving Dream what he wants can open all sorts of doors.

“Hmm. You want soup?” The Corinthian thinks of further distraction, a way to soften this stubborn little thing even further, to render him putty in his hands. To make him moldable. He tilts Dream’s head up, raises his other hand to thumb at his lips, gets them to part so he can feel the breeze of his King’s breath against his skin. “Are you sure?”

The instant order for obedience, the demand for deferential compliance, doesn’t come.

There’s no rebuke for this push back, for daring delay, for daring to not only question him but make him ask again. Instead Dream’s eyes lift to meet his, lashes arching upwards; held fast, pink lips forced to mold around his finger, the crystal of his fevered blush adding a wide eyed innocence the Corinthian wants to lick from head to toe. 

“Still thinking?” He says, sweet in his King’s favoured flavour, sweet because it’s not really sweet at all. “C’mon, you know you don’t really want me to leave…”

[gh-0-stcup]

Examining: Paper Bags

So this is legitimately one of the worst things a character has done in the series so far, imo. It gets a bit lost in the Saw trapping and general craziness surrounding it, but it's quite horrifying when you actually imagine it.

It's also just...bizarre. How do two people end up going through with this? It makes me want to put both of them in a glass room for an extended study. So let's do a deep dive into all this.

In high school, you told a girl you'd only "do her" if she had a paper bag over her head. She agreed and you did it even as she cried.

The first sentence is awful, but fairly normal as far as teenage boys go. The second is where thing goes off the rails. My first question is - what kind of girl agrees to this?

Everybody's wondering what the fuck is wrong with Daniel, but I haven't seen too many people wondering what was going on with this girl. The two are tied together. To see what's wrong with Daniel, you have to look at the girl he did this to.

The most likely way this situation started was the girl (Jane Doe) hitting on Daniel. It also seems likely Jane had some pretty strong feelings for Daniel, given what she was willing to do for his affection. The rejection doesn't come across as something you would say to a close friend, so it's probable Jane was a classmate crushing on Daniel from afar.

I think it goes without saying that Jane had very severe serious self esteem issues.

We have a few options here.

She was so obsessed with Daniel that having him in such a hauntingly degrading manner was preferable to not having him at all.

She was consumed with self hatred and used degrading sex as a form of self harm. She sought out Daniel because she knew he'd hurt her.

A twisted combination of the two.

Another important point in this is that Jane cries, but does not say no or tell him to stop. She "allows"¹ Daniel to continue to completion.²

We've somewhat puzzled out our mysterious and tragic Jane Doe - what does this say about Daniel?

It's Jane agreeing to put a paper bag over her head that makes Daniel interested in having sex with her. The level of desperation this displays, the need to have Daniel even at the cost of harming herself, could very well be what made him want to do this.

It places Daniel very far above Jane. She is nothing, not even worth having her face uncovered. He is everything, the boy a girl would degrade herself for.

That he continued even though Jane was crying strongly suggests that he gets off on the humiliation and degradation of other people.

Putting it all together, Daniel is a sexual sadist with an ego problem who is drawn to desperate, damaged people that have an unhealthy attraction to him. He will exploit their problems for his own gratification and derives gratification from the exploitation itself.

Daniel's intuitive understanding of the emotions of others does not inherently grant him empathy or compassion for them.

¹ I would like to make it very clear that saying Jane "allowed" it to continue is for analyzing her thought process and state of mind in the moment, not a statement about whether this was a consensual act. That isn't up for debate - Daniel raped that poor girl.

² Armand would have mentioned if Jane had protested outside of her tears. The phrasing "you did it" implies that Daniel "completed the act", so to speak.

[crossstitchbossbitch-blog]

Storytime: Believing in Santa, or "I bet you were a delight"

Yesterday on a lunch outing with 5 work colleagues, 3 of whom are parents of kids under 10, plus myself and another young-ish woman who are childless but have enough dealings with sprogs... the conversation turns to Christmas and belief in things like Father Christmas/ Santa, the Tooth Fairy and whatnot.

After general sharing of stories including the parents talking about when their kid stopped believing, or had it told to them by an older kid, I shared my story of having a debate in primary school (y5 or y6, so age 9 or 10) about whether Father Christmas was real.

I had read the Hogfather by Terry Pratchett by that age and shared his solution to the conundrum: that many of these beings can be described as an anthropomorphic personification, and the more belief people have in it, the more real it becomes.

I really like this notion: it gives strength to magic, superstition, beliefs and faith alike. This is how religions rise and fall, how supernatural phenomena won't occur around skeptics and how some things are just ingrained into our collective psyche, because somewhere in our subconscious there is a grain of memory or residual belief about it. It waxes and wanes with the power of collective thought and storytelling, and for those that have time for it, it is as real as you make it.

I didn't say any of that following paragraph, just said the first bit about using it in a primary school debate and it being from Terry Pratchett and the Hogfather; to which the other young woman retorted, "Oh, I bet you were a delight".

I don't know whether I'm meant to be offended. At the time I laughed, and the conversation moved on.

But honestly, I worry that it was meant in a mean way and that kind of upsets me. I have always treasured being able to circumvent the breaking of the illusion and the loss of innocence. I love the fact that reading, an activity always pleasing to grownups, had given me that gift of knowledge and terminology for something I wanted to understand.

Sir Pratchett's influence on the nerdy, the neurodivergent and the not-very-cool is profound and far reaching even after his death. Of course, he was a bestselling author and millions of people have read his works, so I assume neurotypical people have also read his books!

I don't know if I should be sad that this person who called me sarcastically, "a delight", just never got the memo about the wholesome quirky cool that is Pratchett's worldview.

Maybe I am taking offence where none was intended - I guess having a 9 year old use big words could be annoying to adults, but I think it's a good thing. I really wish I could read half as voraciously as I did when I was a child. I miss getting lost in fantasy worlds of literature and by gosh I miss Terry Pratchett. It's it just nostalgia? Maybe. But also if I lose this shit, I probably lose even more of my identity and continue down the slope of depression and anxiety that began around that age. I keep getting told I look so young (I'm 31) and I know that ADHDers do grow up slower than their neurotypical peers. It takes longer for our brains to develop. The ADHD / Autistic brain doesn't "prune" neural pathways and the overlap can contribute to positive and negative elements of cognitive differences. E.g. improved pattern recognition vs sensory overload. I would cite the studies I have looked at, but I can't be bothered digging through my browsing history.

This is one of those times where I overthink the interaction and realise I'm possibly at fault for being "too much", or reflect on a childhood memory and have it reframed as another example of me being neurodivergent and not fitting in. But at that point in time, age 9 or 10, the other kids on my debate team seemed fine with me sharing my point and explaining it, as a means to an end in completing the class debate. I thought I was welcomed.

It's only with this comment, I find myself wondering how much of my past conduct was actually too much or too weird or too different for other people.

Ironically, this lunch came after we had an hour long presentation from the EDI (Equality, Diversity and Inclusion) team at work... where they specifically outlined how feeling "othered" can negatively affect behaviour.

Cool. Cool Cool Cool.

[it-happened-one-fic]

Far More Than My Love - Diluc

Author's Notes: I wrote this fic while listening to Dolly Parton's song "Don't Call it Love." (I recommend you try it, it's a really sweet song!) In initially it was going to be a fic for Twisted Wonderland's Azul Ashengrotto, but I just couldn't get it going so I spun the wheel of fortune and wrote it for Diluc instead. This fic has actually just been sitting a google document gathering dust for a while now, but I didn't know what to post today so it's finally getting to debut. Which reminds me, this is first Diluc fic I'll be posting which is both exciting and nerve-wracking since I've read a lot of good ficlets for him on here already. Reader is gender neutral as per usual. I hope you enjoy!

Type: Fluff/mild angst (kinda?)

Word count: 817

I sat, hand lazily intertwined with his and leaning against his side as we both gazed at the crackling fire in his hearth. 

No one could have predicted that so much snow would start falling quite so suddenly. If they had, I wouldn’t have come to the Dawn Winery for dinner no matter how much I’d wanted to see Diluc or looked forward to Adelinde’s cooking.

But I couldn’t say I regretted anything as I sat curled up by his side in an oddly domestic scene. It was almost enough to be embarrassing…. But then I felt too at peace to get flustered.

His thumb casually swiped across the side of my hand, rubbing in an almost rhythmic manner that was oddly relaxing. I glanced over to see him staring towards the dancing flames, their golden light reflected in his ruby-colored eyes. 

He was thinking about something. What exactly, was hard to say, but his thoughtful gaze was easily enough to make me curious. I tilted my head so I could better observe him, debating whether I should question his pondering expression or not.

Glancing down, he met my gaze, but his thoughtful, if perhaps concerned, expression remained, “If you were asked…. What would you say I felt for you?”

His question caught me off guard, but it did answer some of the questions I’d had. His invitation to dinner had been… sudden.

It wasn’t odd for Diluc to invite me over for dinner. He was, after all, quite affectionate. What was strange was that he’d done so in front of everyone over at Angel’s Share. Usually his invitations were more private, only being offered when it was just the two of us or even via letter. The fact he’d done so in front of so many people had struck me as odd. That, paired with the question he’d just asked, made me wonder if someone had said something.

Because despite being Mondstadt’s vigilante hero and uncrowned king, Diluc could be quite insecure sometimes. He seemed to have difficulty believing that I was happy being with him and loved him.

I had never once doubted his affections for me and I couldn’t be happier. But Diluc often seemed to question whether he was good enough for me. And that was sad, because no man could ever make me feel as loved or happy as he had done and would no doubt continue to do.

 I frowned slightly, at both his question and my thoughts before shaking my head and offering him a reassuring smile, “That would be rather hard for me to answer. After all, I don’t know your thoughts or feelings at any given moment. But if I were asked, I would tell them that you loved me.”

He nodded, but didn’t seem entirely reassured. In fact, he turned to look back towards the flames with an even more pensive expression than before. 

I frowned once more at my failed attempts to reassure him and found myself nudging him, determined to both improve his mood and change his thought processes.

He looked down as soon as nudged him with my shoulder, an expectant expression on face that made me smile, “If they asked you how I felt for you what would you say?”

He blinked in silent surprise as I echoed his question back at him. But then a slight smile appeared on his face, “I would say you loved me far more than I deserved.”

I shoved at him, half-playful and half-annoyed, “Don’t say that! You deserve every bit of love I give you and possibly more! Especially what with all you do for me and everyone here.”

He shook his head and opened his mouth, undoubtedly about to say something about how that wasn’t true, but I cut him off with a new question, “Well then, what would you say if someone asked you how you felt about me?”

He stopped, his gaze holding mine as a slow smile curved across his face. It was one of those moments where an impossible amount of affection glittered deep within his eyes. One of those moments where I didn’t see how anyone, including Diluc himself, could ever question his love for me or the fact that I loved him. Because how could I help but love such a man?

He twisted, carefully taking my hand in his, “I would tell them that you are far more than my love. Love could never encompass all of what I feel for you.” 

I’d been fully prepared to tease him, but all such intentions had disappeared as soon as he began to speak. That gentle look in those red eyes that so many viewed as too intense, but I had long viewed as the greatest comfort in the world.

“If someone were to ask me how I felt for you I would tell them that you are my everything.”

[trickstarbrave]

Hello! I am here to inform you that I would happily read a 10 page essay about Alduin's Bane. Spoilers are a highlight. Your Elder Scrolls lore is incredible and I am frothing at the mouth for more.

oh man now i have decision paralysis i have so much to talk about given the fic is over 150k (somehow. i cant believe i wrote that much) uhhhhhh im just gonna give some bullet points of what i can think of

>originally was going to just be a oneshot centered around the past that would have been the first 3-ish chapters but i liked it so much i had continued it

>hell i had debated actually naming eyja or not for a while lol

>originally fengr wasn't going to be in the story, but i actually liked him the more i thought about him. he is supposed to be the archtypical box art "dragonborn" bethesda markets (except two handed weapons instead of dual wielding). i thought he made a good foil and could help drive some of the character development and give eyja more to connect her to the world and also because i wanted to use him as a foil for another character

>i did intend for sheogorath to be the champion of cyrodiil. not everyone agrees with this theory but i liked it. i also hope i did a better job making the quest more interesting. i was really proud of connecting the weird, seemingly disjointed dream world quests to our main character's psyche and problems rather than being just a cheap joke

>i also LOVE sanguine if you couldn't tell. writing him was some of my favorite stuff. genuine chaos and debauchery. he technically had the right idea

>i had a big plan in mind for a side plot where The Gang currently (fengr, serana, eyja, alduin) run into cicero and the listener who were tasked with assassinating the dragonborn and instead ask for their help to take down astrid who they know is planning on turning on them. this was going to lead to a full blown assassination of the current emperor, but for the life of me i couldn't think of a satisfactory way to connect the plot to the rest of the story without feeling like i was forcing a block through a circular hole so it has been indefinitely tabled. if it makes it back in the story then it does but so far i'm not planning on it. but if you're wondering what happened to our dear little jester he is off helping rebuild the dark brotherhood with his wood elf listener

>in my fic to be mentioned later alduin actually got so angry he ripped off solstheim as a provide from mainland skyrim and flung it off into the ocean during a big ass battle

>i remember some ppl saying alduin could be akin to shiva. whether or not you like this idea or think it is credible i was a lil inspired by the myths of sati and parvati in the loosest of ways

>im still very proud that i made bleakfalls barrow originally designed and built to be eyja's tomb. in functions VERY much as a tutorial dungeon in many aspects with like blatant plot hooks in the form of the dragon stone and word wall that we just dont see in other tombs. not to mention it is very large and in your face, something you expect to be of bigger importance, and delphine wanted the dragon stone for some unexplained reason, so. head dragon priest's tomb it is. but alduin wouldn't actually let her be buried there, which only lead to credence to the mainstream belief that konahrik had defected or betrayed alduin and he had killed her in a rage.

>how she got the mask i just realized i never explained. basically my bullshit reason was she owns the mask. the mask was sealed off to wait for a new owner if one ever came, and then was lost to time. dragon priests arent really supposed to "die" in my telling of events so she got the mask by wandering in and it opened up for her assuming she was the original owner here to claim it. it does not do this for literally anyone else

>alduin kind of fucking sucked at sex. i hint at this in several ways but in their first lifetime he just fucking sucked at it. i cannot fully stress how just bad and clumsy he was. this immortal dragon god of the end of time was a complete virgin and it showed. if it wasn't for the fact he was a god she adored i dont think eyja would have put up with it. but luckily she taught him better.

>they were together i estimate in the ballpark of 60 years prior to her being killed. a very fun time for the people of skyrim given alduin wasnt randomly flying overhead to munch on them

>i wanna work more on serana and alduin's dynamic bc i think it is very funny. she's gotten over her panic into just normal rational fear and questioning her sanity of "wait the actual dragon god??? thats who im traveling with????"

>as far as dragon priests knew it was an open secret eyja and alduin were fucking. the general public didnt know but most of the priests knew. and most of the dragons but they were more confused by the concept of actually having sex which seemed weird in general

actual big spoilers under the cut for people who dont wanna see:

>fengr is, in the next little mini arc we're about to do with curing lycanthrope, about to be revealed as also a dragonborn. i like to imagine that was akatosh's back up plan or something. i wont reveal all of what the revelation entails to keep that fun and exciting

>also to be mentioned: molag bal has beef with alduin and eyja because her mask is actually made of daedric ivory. alduin went "i need a cooler material for her mask to be made out of" and went all the way to a realm of oblivion to kill one of molag bal's big ass daedra. this has lead to much of molag bal's beef with dragons

>several members of the thalmor were investigating the masks (this is canon) and took a particular interest in both eyja's and the time traveling unnamed mask. this wooden mask alduin had made in hopes it could bring eyja back (it failed)

>back to the sati and parvati myths uhhhh part of that has translated to miraak and his motivations. i hope you didn't have "miraak is past life eyja's ex" on your bingo card because you will not be able to check that off. miraak was her father.

>in that regard i had to think a lot about how having kids would be handled by dragon priests. i dont see miraak actually raising any children he had, and he probably had a variety of concubines and wives to sleep with as i imagine most of the other dragon priests did, but no time to actually get attached. so she probably only had some status and little interactions with him prior to this, but boy was miraak mad he couldnt just use her influence for his own gain. idk if i will get to mention all this part in my fic lol

>finding out one of his kids actually inherited his abilities led him down the path to trying to understand what dragonborn were. he thought he was a strange, special existence, but finding out there were more people like him made him wanna find out how they worked. this also invariably led to him experimenting on several of eyja's multitude of half siblings that died prior to him getting his hands on her. also prob wont get to mention all this in the fic

>in this vein i had the idea to make vahlok eyja's other parent but i didn't think it did much for the story so. i might go in the way of "helpful mentor" or just that he didnt fucking suck

[arcanehobo]

I ask that respectfully because your blog doesn’t specify otherwise and it’s important to me to make sure men aren’t interacting with my blog.

I know it is presumptuous to see a masculine person with he/him pronouns and say “that’s a man” but for my own personal boundaries I need to check.

[This was preceded by a message asking "Are you a man?"; I have no other context whatsoever.]

So, obviously this answer doesn't fit with the general theme of this blog. But the anon posting the ask is, well, anon, so I don't have much option in replying to them, and it feels kind of discourteous to not reply, since the answer is clearly meaningful to them. I'll leave this up for about 48 hours, so the anon can see it, and then - probably - take it down again. [ETA: Although now I've spent a chunk of time thinking about and writing an answer to it, maybe I'll leave it up. It is, regretfully, a bit on the mansplain-y side, but with the lack of context, it's the best I can do.]

So, anon, that's a big question. I don't really feel qualified to answer it as written, because the culture I live in makes it pretty clear that "man" is something other people tell you you are or are not, not something you can claim for yourself. There are debates and accusations around the term "real man". I am not attached to the term, and have been generally amused by the attempts of others to tell me that I am or am not one.

If you're asking if I'm trans in some way, I'm unconvinced that that is any of your business, and your asking makes me suspect you're some kind of TERF. I've deleted TERFy asks here before, and dealt with some mild hostility from people who object to my he/him pronoun badges in real life too.

If you're asking if I'm biologically male, I feel that's also not really your business, any more than your sexual characteristics are any of mine. But out of an excess of courtesy, I can say that as far as I know, yes, but I've never had any examination of chromosomes, or any of the myriad other conditions and states of being that would make that debateable. However, "biologically male" starts to verge very close, again, to TERF stuff, and if that's the gist of what you're asking, you can fuck right off and continue to fuck off a bit further after that; my use of pronouns on my profile is mostly to help establish a cultural norm for the people to whom they are important, and partly to politely give people a set of pronouns they can use to refer to me.

If you're asking if I identify as a man, or male - which are two different things, related only by social construction - I'm not sure if I do or not. To be honest, I identify more as a wizard or as a GM or as a cook than I do as male or a man. It's not a question that's important to me, and hasn't been since I was a child (and even then my main question was whether I was "allowed" buy the Sylvanian Families toys or not).

I hope that goes some way toward answering your question, anon, because frankly, it's a bit weird to just post up out of nowhere and ask it.

It is possible, given the "interacting with my blog" line, that you are in some way asking me to post some DNI stuff in my profile. While I try to respect other people's DNIs - I don't want to read stuff written by people who don't want me to read it, unless they're legislators - I also think they're complete nonsense (and if I hit "follow" from a post or Tumblr rec, I don't see them). More broadly, if a tumblr blog is viewable, there is nothing stopping a malicious actor from viewing it while not logged in, or logged into an alt account. There are a lot of ways to establish safe spaces into which you can allow people on a whitelist; discord, newsletter subscriptions, private email, locked Twitter accounts, etc. Tumblr doesn't have the technology for that. Notwithstanding my fervent desire for TERFs and Nazis (to pick two meaningful categories) to not participate in my life, I don't have even the slightest expectation that either group would comply. So I will not be posting any such stuff on mine.

Some more context would be very nice, if you're inclined to give it, anon, because this ask has arrived in out of the blue, and I'm still half-thinking it's a new variety of spam.

[the-digicorn]

I mean this completely respectfully because the anti-AI argument is complex and the “winning arguments” depend completely on who you’re trying to convince. I’m an aspiring media composer (music for films tv videos podcasts etc) and AI has been a big topic of conversation in my masters since it’s affecting music too. Everything’s I’m about to say is just my opinion and I’m far from an expert.

In defence of the copyright argument:

The quality of media generated by AI will only continue to improve as long as the money is there to fund it, so a lot of it’s unsettling issues will be accounted for in the near future, and unfortunately all the ethics arguments are unlikely to really get us anywhere unless it becomes the significant majority view, which currently I don’t think it is.

Copyright is the one thing that I believe can create a profit problem for the massive companies that would benefit from AI otherwise.

Currently there’s debate over whether media produced by AI is even copyrightable, and this is important. Copyright is a large part of how creators make money from their work and generates income through royalties.

When AI is trained unethically and regurgitates untraceable parts of so many peoples work, it has infringed on their copyright. Currently most AI companies try to avoid all the problems that follow from there by stating in their terms and conditions that none of the generated work is copyrightable. Depending on your country’s laws, copyright can only be owned by a human person who created a work. That selfie that was taken by a monkey on a photographers camera caused a right fuss because the photographer tried to claim copyright, but because the money pressed the button it was deemed uncopyrightable. AI is more complicated cos there are a few different points that AI bros argue qualify someone for copyright, but this is where the legal battle needs to happen!

We need work produced by AI, especially unethically trained AI, to be deemed uncopyrightable!

If a work cannot be copyrighted, there is nothing to stop another person or company taking it and making money from it themselves. Disney wants complete control over the media it produces, it already buys out as much of its creators’ copyright share as it legally can and this is the norm for media monopolies. If a work cannot be copyrighted, Disney cannot control it and cannot own it, and therefore cannot profit from it exclusively in the way it can when it exploits creatives. If AI work cannot be copyrighted, this massively disincentivises companies from using it.

Don’t get me wrong this would still be appealing to indie creators who don’t want to spend on hiring real people for the things they can’t do themselves, but if there’s no major shareholder money going into it that may theoretically reduce access to it for the people who would still want it.

The flip side of all that is a case where AI is trained “ethically” on data that is willingly given by its copyright holder. Work created in this way would have a long list of traceable sources that it’s regurgitating and even if a specific piece can’t tell you where it’s data is from at least the whole model’s training data could be tracked and not stolen. This would mean that yes Disney could train an AI model on all the media it owns which would suck and get boring fast (it’s already getting boring because of the way streaming has affected movie profits and what they can safely make costs back on) but would fall under the “ethical” training model that I suspect is a likely step for AI in the near future.

The solve for that is once again copyright! Don’t allow the result to be copyrightable!

Media Empires (derogatory) don’t care about ethics, they know the tech will keep advancing, they don’t particularly want money going to anyone but themselves. The only thing that can convince a Media Monopoly that it shouldn’t do something is the profit margin. If you want AI to wither away into obscurity, pay attention to how copyright law will account for it, because it will either feed companies a new age of content farming, or it could hit them in the one place they can bleed.

Sorry for the ramble I hope that makes sense and pls do correct me if I’m wrong about anything!

on the other end the copyright argument against ai art is just so bad. I hate how that's the most common one people use, like I'm sorry but an interpretation of copyright law that classifies images made with generative ai as "plagiarism" or "theft" would be a worst-case scenario for everyone except the walt disney corporation

[saint-ambroses-bees]

@argument-side-blog cause I can’t reblog your post for whatever reason

"You’re missing the entire point of my argument. I am not saying that catholicism is right."

No, in that case, it is actually YOU who is missing the point of MY argument. Because if you cannot respond to the multiple different places where I've challenged the false teachings, evil deeds and inherent corruption of the Catholic Church, whatever else you might have to say is basically pointless.

That’s not what we’re discussing. This evidence is irrelevant in the context of the question of whether Augustine is catholic or not. This evidence is redundant because you’ve sent it to me before. I am getting to it, but this post is about Saint Augustine. Please start a new one if you’d like to discuss something on an entirely different topic

It's like saying "Yeah sure, we allied with the nazis, raped kids and lied about the origin of our authority to do these things, but my guy Augustine over here said it's cool!"

why is this relevant

We can talk about the evils that come from the people in the church, but why are we talking about it on a post about what saint augustine believes

Send me an ask or something to start another thread about a different topic if you want to talk about a different topic

So even setting aside the fact that your argument is factually wrong and you have de facto already surrendered the debate by agreeing that the overwhelming majority of what I've said is true,

How the hell is my argument factually wrong? I presented things that Augustine has said that contradict what you said. I did say some stuff about Tradition, but that’s irrelevant in the context of the question of whether Augustine is catholic or not. What did I agree with that you take as a surrendering of debate?

even if we say your supposed defense of Augustine is valid, why would I even care?

You’re literally a Christian my guy you’re supposed to look for the truth

In that case Augustine should just spend eternity in a dark place with the rest of the Catholics.

You’re literally a Christian my guy you’re supposed to love your enemy

"You also argued that Augustine believed in sola scriptura so i responded with citations of primary texts in which he says that Tradition is actually good, which as far as i know is a no-no with sola scriptura, so i did respond to your argument"

You quoted a few things he said, giving no context to when, where or to whom he said them, and then you mic dropped as if that proved your argument. You provided no sources and only minimal rhetorical support for your claim.

Did you read my post

I linked the primary texts

I gave instructions on where to look

But sure, here you go:

"For if the lineal succession of bishops is to be taken into account, with how much more certainty and benefit to the Church do we reckon back till we reach Peter himself, to whom, as bearing in a figure the whole Church, the Lord said: Upon this rock will I build my Church, and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it! Matthew 16:18 The successor of Peter was Linus, and his successors in unbroken continuity were these:— Clement, Anacletus, Evaristus, Alexander, Sixtus, Telesphorus, Iginus, Anicetus, Pius, Soter, Eleutherius, Victor, Zephirinus, Calixtus, Urbanus, Pontianus, Antherus, Fabianus, Cornelius, Lucius, Stephanus, Xystus, Dionysius, Felix, Eutychianus, Gaius, Marcellinus, Marcellus, Eusebius, Miltiades, Sylvester, Marcus, Julius, Liberius, Damasus, and Siricius, whose successor is the present Bishop Anastasius."

This quote is given in the context of Augustine writing to a friend who received a letter from a donatist. This specific Donatist apparently rejected the See because of corruption (donatists believed that ministers had to be sinless for sacraments to work or something) and Augustine spoke about the succession in the donatist’s city and then in Rome. He calls back to Apostolic succession in this quote.

Translated by J.G. Cunningham. From Nicene and Post-Nicene Fathers, First Series, Vol. 1. Edited by Philip Schaff. (Buffalo, NY: Christian Literature Publishing Co., 1887.) Revised and edited for New Advent by Kevin Knight. <http://www.newadvent.org/fathers/1102053.htm>.

"For already have two councils on this question been sent to the Apostolic see; and rescripts also have come from thence. The question has been brought to an issue; would that their error may sometime be brought to an issue too!"

This quote is from a sermon on which Saint Augustine speaks on the line ‘unless you eat the flesh’; at the end (that which is quoted) he says that the Apostolic See gets the final say, and that we should listen to the end which Rome comes to.

Translated by R.G. MacMullen. From Nicene and Post-Nicene Fathers, First Series, Vol. 6. Edited by Philip Schaff. (Buffalo, NY: Christian Literature Publishing Co., 1888.) Revised and edited for New Advent by Kevin Knight. <http://www.newadvent.org/fathers/160381.htm>.

"As to those other things which we hold on the authority, not of Scripture, but of tradition, and which are observed throughout the whole world, it may be understood that they are held as approved and instituted either by the apostles themselves, or by plenary Councils, whose authority in the Church is most useful, e.g. the annual commemoration, by special solemnities, of the Lord's passion, resurrection, and ascension, and of the descent of the Holy Spirit from heaven, and whatever else is in like manner observed by the whole Church wherever it has been established."

This quote is from a letter to a friend who is wondering why different dioceses have different traditions (little t traditions, not Sacred Tradition). Augustine states at the beginning that certain things are permanent because of Scripture and Tradition, and that things like fasting on certain days are not necessarily bound by either.

Translated by J.G. Cunningham. From Nicene and Post-Nicene Fathers, First Series, Vol. 1. Edited by Philip Schaff. (Buffalo, NY: Christian Literature Publishing Co., 1887.) Revised and edited for New Advent by Kevin Knight. <http://www.newadvent.org/fathers/1102054.htm>.

I could quote and explain the other ones, but the important part is that they mention Tradition as a source of authority. Continuing

In my original post, I quoted Augustine (keeping in mind that you have not disputed the quote itself),

Yes i did

Multiple times

I explicitly said that the paragraph you quoted actually says the opposite of what you say it says twice now

gave contextual explanation of why I felt the quote supported my view of the situation,

it doesn’t

then cited several additional sources which also presented the same thesis with additional supporting facts.

Here's the thing, not only did you misunderstand the quote by not reading the entire passage, but Augustine clearly elsewhere relies on Tradition as a source of authority. All he says in this passage, which btw, I have said like eight times now, is that we should be skeptical of anything new that we read. He also says that we can use the opinions of others that we know to be true because of divine help to see whether something is right or not. You quoted something that actively argues against your own point.

Sorry, but I'm going to say that my original argument still stands, even aside from the fact that your rebuttal was irrelevant.

You didn’t read my rebuttal

"I’ve hit at least two links that lead to a page that says there’s nothing to be found"

Then you are either lying or there is a technical problem on your end, because as I said, I double checked every single link I provided and they all worked. Either way, not my fault.

Technical problem I think. I can no longer see your blog. Sometimes tumblr lets me see your posts and sometimes it says they don’t exist

"These are massive questions..."

It isn't a question. There are no questions here. I haven't asked you a question.

Did you read the sentence before that one??? I said it in reference to the article which you sent me? It contains many questions about what tradition is. I imagine if you sent me the article that you wanted me to be concerned with its substance?

I gave you evidence that the Catholic Church is evil and that it has lied about it's pedigree. You can agree that I'm right, or you can explain how I'm wrong.

Fantastic. How does this coincide with Augustine’s being catholic. Because this is what this post is about, isn’t it?

And as you did in this latest response, you have mostly agreed that the majority of my argument is factually accurate.

What does that prove? Majority is not entirety.

You have only "disagreed" to a limited extent by either quoting Augustine or by making some vague philosophical objections.

It’s not vague, it’s broad. Ask narrower questions and I’ll give narrower answers.

If this debate were being judged by an outside party, I think it is safe to say they wouldn't be voting for you at this point.

It’s a good thing truth isn’t democratic isn’t it

"We literally agree with this"

See what I mean?

Because we do?

"Tradition is only Tradition if it agrees with scripture If it doesn’t, it’s not Tradition"

That isn't actually what the Catholic Church teaches or says.

Yes it does CCC 80 they must flow out of the same stream, they must be in agreement

According to the Catholic Church, it's clerics, priests, popes, etc, can write new rules and traditions at any time and those writings are given equal weight as scripture.

nope

If the new traditions and other church doctrines appear to conflict with scripture, rather than answering those contradictions, Catholics merely say things like "we wrote the bible so we know what it means" or "only the church has authority to interpret scripture."

No we don’t

Catholics never explain or defend their interpretation of scripture beyond invoking their exclusive authority, which is the circular reasoning which I cited earlier.

Yes we do

The Catholic Church also plays shell games with the supposed "infallibility" of the Pope, as I have previously pointed out.

The pope is not the same entity as the church, you realize this right? The pope has free will and can be a sinner if he so chooses. This is why there’s this specific regulation in place.

And I do not see how Augustine, having explicitly said that laypersons had every right to question so-called church authorities, would support such blatant abuse of power. Not that I care what Augustine thinks either way, but I remain unconvinced that he would support the obvious heresy and hypocrisy which is the modern day Roman Catholic Church.

How about the passage i quoted where he says that rome gets the final say and that we should listen to rome

"You assume that I don't have a life... Be patient."

I don't make assumptions about you, other than that you are Catholic and that you seem unable to explain where my arguments are wrong. And considering both of those assumptions are supported by the available facts, I believe they are justified assumptions.

It’s very difficult to read anything you send from a practical standpoint because every link leads to eighteen other links which in turn lead to even more and so on and so on and so on

So yes, i am not unable to explain that your arguments are wrong, i am unable to read a huge collection of arguments in a short time period. It takes me hours to get through a single article from the summa. There is a difference.

I have a life too. And Reformation Day is over. I've got other stuff to do this week, including preparing for Pope Night as my next Catholic bashing holiday of choice.

Glad you’re keeping up with your hobbies

And since this is my post and my blog, I'm going to invoke home rule

You invited me to this particular post, I say be hospitable (and rational).

and say you need to play by my rules and my timetable. If you haven't got a response because you need to go "research" more, so be it.

I know you’d like me to say stupid shit so you can go oh look stupid catholics but actually no i’m not gonna do that

What possible reason would you have to restrict someone to a specific timetable in an internet debate? If we were talking in person and I sat down for four days, sure. But we aren’t. So why?

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