#dean winchester’s heterosexuality
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Heterosexuality according to Dean Winchester:
1. Checking a handsome guy's dick.
2. Checking a handsome guy out.
3. Staring at a handsome guy's lips.
4. Slapping a handsome guy's ass.
5. Gently caressing a handsome guy's face
6. Getting a boner when looking at a handsome guy.
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#violently heterosexual#i am decreased#castiel#dean winchester#destiel#spn#supernatural#dean loves cas#youtube comments#just guys being dudes#1k
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as much as i love sam knowing about destiel before dean does, there's something about "i mean yeah my brother and his angel best friend are really weird about each other, live together, co-parent a kid, nearly kill themselves every time the other is gone, stand too close and stare at the other's mouth while they talk, but i mean to each their own i guess??" that's so special to me
#it's just so funny#and when it finally clics he's like#OH#that... explains a lot actually#he's so committed to believe dean's heterosexual act#and you know what i respect sam for it#if the dude says he's straight then it doesn't matter he stares at men lusting! he's STRAIGHT.#i'm sam btw#i had a friend who told me for 6 months he was straights while he performed in my face Telephone by Lady Gaga#and also knew the entire loona lore#but he said he was STRAIGHT okay#i had the audacity (or the politeness ig) to act surprised when he came out#i'm rambling#sorry#destiel#dean winchester#castiel#supernatural#spn#casdean#sam winchester
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Gayest Dean Moment Not Involving Cas Number 4 ➼ Aaron Bass
Bonus:
#turning down a man with 'This is a federal investigation' instead of just saying 'I'm not gay' is totally heterosexual behavior actually#spn#gay dean series#dean winchester#aaron bass#long post#my edits#spnedit#deanedit#season gr8#8x13 everybody hates hitler#spncreatorsdaily#cowboycoven
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"I think too much heart was always castiel's problem" is said by the angel samandriel, while looking dean right in the eyes
#there is no heterosexual explanation for this#everyone but dean knows about destiel#spn#supernatural#dean winchester#castiel#destiel#deancas#spn s8#spn 8x02#purgatory#spn purgatory
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STACKEDNATURAL ⇉ 156/327 (part 2)
2.11 Playthings Written by Matt Witten Directed by Charles Beeson Original Air Date: January 18, 2007
#supernatural#sam winchester#dean winchester#samwinchesteredit#deanwinchesteredit#stackednatural#spn#spnedit#supernaturaledit#becauseofthebowties#altarofrowena#userknights#deancaskiss#userrlaura#2x11#YOU WANNA KNOW THE FUCKING HETEROSEXUAL EXPLANATION FOR THIS?????#THEY ARE BROTHERS AND ONE OF THEM IS DRUNK SO THE OTHER IS TAKING CARE OF HIM#THATS HOW FAMILY WORKS IT DOESN'T MEAN THEY WANT TO FUCK EACH OTHER#GET OVER IT
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Ok but i truly dont believe dean and sam would ever live "normal" lives ok like shoot me but all their friends r hunters cas is an angel like sam was like on his way to being a witch like no. I dont want them to leave. They can happy fufilling lives and still be in the supernatural world dean could open a hunters bar or something cos esp with dean he wants to save people so yk they could be helping the next generation or something LIKE CMON
#supernatural#spn#destiel#dean winchester#castiel#IM SORRY THEM LIVING NORMAL LIVES IS THE WORST POSSIBLE ENDING FOR ME#PEACE? YEAH OKAY MAYBE A PEACE WHERE THEY STILL HELP PEOPLE AND DONT NEVER TALK TO ANY OF THEIR FRIENDS AGAIN#ROWENAS THE QUEEN OF HELL#JACKS A NEPHLIM#them living “normal” lives#is pretty much the same as them living heterosexual child centric nuclear family type lives#THAT IS NOT THEM#spn is about found family#actually.#js saying
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Sometimes I just glance at the Supernatural tag and see some quote or line from the show or gif that makes me go "oh, y’all got BAITED queerbaited, didn't you?" Like the level of psychic damage is somehow above and beyond the queerbaiting in Sherlock, which I didn't think was POSSIBLE
#destiel#supernatural#sherlock#bbc sherlock#johnlock#dean winchester#castiel novak#castiel#like these characters will literally say shit like “he's the one human you love” or “when he first laid eyes on you he was damned”#and you expect me to believe that they aren't as derangedly devoted to each other as hannigram and the like#there is no heterosexual explanation for this#absolutely none
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It's intriguing how Supernatural subverted the conventional trope where the hero's love interest is perpetually endangered or taken hostage because she's his 'Achilles' heel' or 'weak spot' (wild that samdean explicitly dubbed each other with these two btw). Instead, the show replaced the heroine with Sam, seamlessly reimagining the dynamic while still adhering to traditional gender roles.
and they wonder why people are shipping the brothers maybe bc the brothers are written like the show's surrogate token lovers
#spn writers were like we're revolutionizing the scene everyone is doing lovers well we're doing BROTHERS#and instead of heterosexual romance we got fucked up gay incest#they really replaced dean's lover with sam and called it a day#the later seasons depiction of them in domestic husband/wife roles probably didn't help#like what do you mean the boy you dubbed your “son” was having a rebellious moment and begged to do that sth he shouldn't#and dean (dad) was chill but was like your mom (sam) will be angry if she finds out#samdean#wincest#spn#sam winchester#salmon dean#dean winchester#spn meta#mine
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Has Castiel Appeared in The Winchesters?
3/7/2023: no, you idjits
#castiel#spnwin#spn#heterosexual cars come back to life gay angels stay in heaven#jack knew cas wouldn’t be hard enough on dean#the winchesters#the winchesters spoilers#spnwin spoilers#the Winchesters 01x13#spnwin 01x13#the winchesters 01x13#the winchesters 01x13 spoilers#spnwin 01x13 spoilers
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Everytime I point out that Dean Winchester is autistic, people get mad or look at me like I’ve spontaneously grown a second head, as if this man’s existence isn’t just checking off boxes for the diagnostic criteria
Special interests: westerns, cars, mechanical engineering stuff in general, 1960’s & 70’s music - specifically classic rock, monsters. You’re gonna look me in the eyes and tell me that it’s totally normal for someone who was born in 1979 to have borderline encyclopedic knowledge of two decades of music????? Hundreds of years of monster lore??? — for fuck’s sake, he had a train thing when he was little!!!! Those are special interests!!!!
Restricted diet: it’s mostly for Jokes but dean genuinely doesn’t eat much beyond burgers, diner food and pie.
Dean didn’t speak for months after Mary died and there’s 15 years of canon evidence where he loses his voice during moments of Big Emotions!!! He’s going nonverbal!!!!!!!
Trouble with social cues: literally look at every single instance of Dean trying to interact with strangers, ESPECIALLY in the early seasons. He’s not playing dumb, he just doesn’t get it. Also, watch any scene of this man TRYING to flirt and tell me that he’s any good at it. You know why? That bitch is mimicking the fucking movies and tv shows he grew up watching.
Sensory processing disorder: DO YOU THINK HE WEARS 87 LAYERS FOR FUN???? FOR FASHION????? WHAT DID YOU THINK ALL THE FLANNELS WERE ABOUT. THEY’RE SOFT. Also think about how much he liked the nightgown and the robe. ALSO, ALSO: school!!! It’s loud, it’s smelly, it’s dirty (his germ thing), the lights are too bright, there’s too much sensory input happening at one time. Between being so overwhelmed in school that he couldn’t focus and John pulling him left & right for cases and Sam, no wonder dean dropped out :(
14.04. The comic book episode is an ENTIRE episode about dean and his special interests!!!!!! And his social anxiety, hiding out in his room at the beginning of the episode because of all the strangers in his home 😤
Emotional regulation problems: those angry outbursts?? Destroying the Impala??? LOOK ME IN THE EYES AND TELL ME THATS NOT A MELTDOWN
His whole personality is a mask! He based his whole life and personality around the men he grew up around! John, Bobby, the other hunters - we all know that dean isn’t this rugged manly man he puts on. Sure people can have layers, but my man literally wore his dad’s actual jacket for fucking years
Black & white thinking: this doesn’t need anything else tbh
Strong sense of Justice: “how many people do you have to save?” “All of ‘em. Whole wide world of sports.”
Literal thinking: half the show is about how they both have to learn to look at monsters and not immediately go “monsters bad.” Also literal thinking is hard to explain, but I promise he does this.
Hyperlexic: “what? I read?”
“Too blunt”: all those times you thought “that was kinda harsh Dean” or “wtf that was so mean” - he doesn’t like lying to people when he doesn’t have to!
Hyper empathy: “The baby in the well? My bad.” “I do my best to be brave.” Sacrificing himself for people over and over again. The djinn episode and the speech he makes in front of John’s grave. His whole life he’s been told he cares too much!!!!
As a fellow AuDHD bitch, the most AuDHD thing Dean has ever said was “we know a little about a lot of things. Just enough to make us dangerous.” Also: “I got no idea. But what I do have is a GED and a give ‘em hell attitude, and I’ll figure it out.”
Like I could dive into the nuances of all of these and explain them in great detail and find textual evidence for basically everything, but it’s too early in the morning for that much work when I know that I’m right. Yeah he has adhd, obviously, but I will eat my left hand if that man isn’t autistic.
#why do you think him & Cas get along so well!!#hilariously I don’t necessarily agree with the hc that Cas is autistic bc he’s just an angel with no context for all these things#but he’s like Spock! allegory or whatever for autism so ofc him & dean immediately vibe#also you think Charlie was allistic?!?! be so fucking for real rn#you think an autistic lesbian would intentionally befriend a heterosexual (allegedly) neurotypical yt man??#[slams fists on the table] YOUR HONOR DEAN WINCHESTER IS A HIGH MASKING AUTISTIC AND I WILL NOT BE TAKING NOTES#personal
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Me: I have very selective taste, I am very picky about those I am attracted to and will never jump into feelings lest I know the attraction I feel is adaquet and they meet my standards
Also me after a stranger gives me 2 seconds of undivided attention: I would without a doubt open mouth kiss you.
#smaeemo#funfact#I have never had a crush on someone#however I have had moments where I have 100% considered just looking someone in the eyes and saying#I would open mouth kiss you#and you know what#I stand by it#lol#aroace#arospec#acespec#compulsive heterosexuality#comedy#funny#memes#autism#aurizzm#sigh#spn#supernatural#castiel#dean winchester#heavy emphasis on stranger#I would never kiss my friends#ick
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It blows my mind to think that some people honestly believe that Dean's response to Cas' testiment of love for him would be a homophobic comment. Well, no. It actually makes sense because these people see what they want to see.
The rest of us see the despair on Dean's face. The disbelief. The heartbreak. The love. It is so clearly there and shining through the entire scene. There is not one ounce of disgust there, and the fact that some people claim to see that in Dean reflects their own true feelings about themselves.
Not Dean. Dean loves Cas.
#destiel#supernatural#spn#castiel#dean winchester#and the way he sprints up the stairs when he thinks Cas is back#like he can't stand to be away from him another second#yeah#violently heterosexual#just dudes being bros#just guys being dudes
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🚨‼️FAG ALERT ‼️🚨
#that isnt very heterosexual of you Mr Dean “Ladies man” Winchester !#cupping your homies face like this then whimpering out his name later in the scene ...#certifird Fag Moment#rewatch notes#destiel#deancas#spn#supernatural#castiel#dean winchester
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I was thinking about the Scooby Doo/Supernatural crossover.
Right, so we all know Velma's gay, that's the official, real, original Velma from the first show to the direct-to-DVD movies.
Now, let's assume ScoobyNatural, the Supernatural Series 13 episode where the Supernatural brothers, Sam and Dean, along with their fake John Constantine guy, Castiel (who apparently died and was brought back with no explanation just for the crossover) get put into Scooby Doo because of a ghost. This is the only episode of that show I have seen.
Anyway, let's assume they were put into real Scooby Doo, back in time somehow, instead of a fake ghost-made version of Scooby Doo like the in-universe rationalisation. The people making it wanted that to be the case. I agree.
So, let's assume the original episode still happened, then this time travel added them to the episode. It still works with the show, they time travel all the time in the comics, and despite differences to the original made by the ghost, Sam and Dean do make a point of making sure the Scooby gang are still as normal as can be for their future adventures.
Oh, during the episode there's even a subplot where one of the brothers, Dean, tries to get with Daphne. Except that doesn't work, of course. Because Fred. At the end of the episode, they do a twist, however. Velma kisses him as they leave. And if you're an expert at the subtle ways of heterosexual communications, Velma apparently likes him back? This was shown earlier in the episode too, from what I can tell.
Bit of a mad thought but why not do it? Dean does a remark, Velma apparently wants to keep in touch. However, one snaggle*, Velma is still gay. And I know what you're thinking. But mainline Velma is better than that. But if the ghost from Supernatural was affecting the original Scooby Gang, what if the ghost like temporarily degayed her to make Dean happy/put him off the scent and keep them mostly in-character? Or like made original Velma be heterosexual for that one episode? Ghostly comphet if you will. I don't know. Oh, fun fact, the Scooby Gang are all DC characters because of their Batman crossover in the New Scooby-Doo Movies, their second incarnation, making them too exist in every DC universe. Even New 52. I don't even want to know what happened to them there.
*(They may have fallen into the James Gunn Scooby Doo 2 Trap Zone with Velma but Shaggy being somewhat self-aware is consistent with the direct-to-DVD series, specifically the Batman: The Brave and The Bold crossover movie. Oh, speaking of that one, it makes sense that they existed in the show's universe the whole time but Bat-Mite just didn't want to mess with them.)
#supernatural#scooby doo#scoobynatural#velma dinkley#sam winchester#dean winchester#castiel#do i tag everyone#daphne blake#fred jones#scooby gang#mystery machine#yes the car is a member of the gang#spoilers for scoobynatural#subtle ways of heterosexual communication#straightwashing#destraightwashing#batman: the brave and the bold#the brave and the bold#batman#dc universe#technical batman post#Scooby Doo New 52#all the crossovers count muahahaha#even multiversus#one day i'll tie scooby with the jason timeline somehow.#one day#scooby doo expanded timeline would be a nightmare seriously#imagine including all the dc reboots and the different incarnations of the show#and the series that are technically a different universe or done by simulated versions
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literally doesn’t care he just signed up a suicide deal he’s just so happy
“All Hell Breaks Loose, Part 2″
Supernatural S2E22
#where is that post that goes jensen ackles youre eyes are too sparkly for you to be heterosexual#all hell breaks loose#dean winchester#sam winchester#supernatural#2x22#jensen ackles#jared padalecki
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