#dealwithitbook

[ptsdcollab]

Boken in hard places

I wrote this piece, B roken in Hard Places , out of a sense of profound dismay. Sexual abuse breaks a man in places that cannot be easily identified or openly discussed.    The sexual abuse of men is not a topic that we as a society are comfortable to discuss. Over and over again, bias and stereotypes direct the conversation. Complicate the scenario further with the perpetrator being female, and on top of that, a care-giver, a family member, a  mother– it is simply not something we are prepared to talk about honestly and openly.    This makes it all the more difficult to deal with. The smirks, the accusations of, “You’re a liar,” or, “That sort of thing just doesn’t happen,” drive the issue inward with disastrous results. The emotion, mental and physical damage caused by this level of abuse and betrayal can only be dealt with in an atmosphere of acceptance and non-judgment.    “Who would judge a man who has been abused?” you might ask. Almost universally, men who have been abused will tell you, “Everyone.” That’s why men don’t talk about it. We live our lives broken in hard places, broken in places not seen.

http://www.drjohnaking.com/ptsd-recovery/boken-hard-places/

Poetry by Dr John A. King

[imarygeorge-blog]

The Sound of Sunshine

The Sound of Sunshine    “On difficult days  when the storm is ragging within me  I sit  wait  and listen  for the sounds of sunshine”   Most mornings are like this for me.  I wake struggling to breathe.  Trying to catch a breath.  Needing to stop the world spinning and emotions swirling.  I used to fight those feelings. I used to have programs, systems, drugs in place to combat them and help me level out.  Now I have found that the most effective thing to do is anticipate the emotions, the blackness, the rage and sit. Quietly. And wait. And listen. Within about 45 mins of rising, calm rolls in, like waves.  This has become known to me as “..the sound of sunshine.”

http://www.drjohnaking.com/ptsd-recovery/sound-of-sunshine/

Poetry by Dr John A. King

[brysonmaverick-blog]

Our future

We stood there, holding each other as tight as our own skin.  Looking at the future, not sure what it held.  It was large and full of equal parts danger and adventure and we wanted it all.  – theAuthor

http://www.drjohnaking.com/poetry-and-art/our-future/

Poetry by Dr John A. King

[miketurnbull86-blog]

The Promise

The promise   I, ____, take you, ____,  for my lawful (husband/ wife ),  to have  and to hold ,  from this day  forward ,  for better,  for worse ,  for richer,  for poorer ,   in sickness  and in health,  until  death do  us part.

http://www.drjohnaking.com/ptsd-recovery/the-promise/

Poetry by Dr John A. King

[jamacianbrown-blog]

I watch child pornography to prosecute sex crimes. The kids’ silence is deafening.

I need to warn you about this post…I read it and it disturbed me for days. The memories it brought back, I still feel sick to my stomach, but it is all so true..so disgustingly and horrifically true.  ——    The article is by Sarah Chang. The artwork by Gérard DuBois.        During my first week as a federal prosecutor of sexual abuse crimes against children, one of my colleagues told me her chief coping mechanism: Turn the sound off when you have to watch a video multiple times. This advice scared me. I imagined children screaming, crying and shrieking in pain — the stuff of nightmares.  My office is responsible for investigating and prosecuting such crimes, namely the production, possession and trafficking of child pornography. My first case file contained multiple CDs and DVDs showing a young girl being sexually abused by her father, who filmed his crimes with a handheld camera. Despite my colleague’s warning, I knew I couldn’t remain deaf during my first pass at the evidence. I went to our forensic computer lab and braced myself.  But all I heard was silence. The 5-year-old girl said nothing — not even a sob. Disturbed, I continued to watch each video with the sound on. I tried to beat back the silence by turning the volume up as high as it could go. The quiet was too deafening, too defeating to accept. Surely, these children must make a sound?  But in video after video, I witnessed silent suffering. I later learned that this is a typical reaction of young sexua ..

http://www.drjohnaking.com/the-voice/i-watch-child-pornography-to-prosecute-sex-crimes-the-kids-silence-is-deafening/

By Dr John A. King

Give Them A Voice Foundation

[coolbyronsummers]

My shed

The sun on my face,  coffee and cigar in hand,  I sit,  quietly,  and for just a moment,  for just a little while,  the world stopped spinning and the silence drowned out the noise of life.  And I was safe.

http://www.drjohnaking.com/poetry-and-art/my-shed/

Poetry by Dr John A. King

[t-p-smythe-blog]

Paths to Recovery

“There were two therapist sitting in a bar….” or maybe I should say, “There were a thousand therapist sitting in a bar and a massive bar fight broke out because they each had their own opinion on how WE were suppose to recover.”  Just like it is your story, it is your journey. There is no right or wrong way…there is just the journey. For me I found EMDR useful for a time, but really it has been tenacity, writing, the gym and being future focused that has helped me through.  If I had stopped pursuing recovery, if I had allowed the options of others and even the sway of a therapist to determine my course, I would never be this far down the path to wholeness. If you spend anytime reading or talking to others about their story you will find that there are as many similarities as there are  people recovering.

http://www.drjohnaking.com/ptsd-recovery/paths-to-recovery/

Poetry by Dr John A. King

[debrabackwood-blog]

Defining Human Trafficking

What Is The Difference Between Human Trafficking And Sex Trafficking?  So what is the difference between human trafficking and sex trafficking? There is a lot of talk in the media and in community circles about human trafficking. However when you drill down into it with people, they are fuzzy on the definitions and the conditions of what exactly it means to be “trafficked.” I was talking to an ex-police officer the other day and he wanted to know the difference between human trafficking and the prostitute or street workers he saw some 20 years ago.  Let’s start by saying that there is a difference between human trafficking and human trafficking for sexual exploitation. One is an overarching term for the condition, the other is a subset of the condition.   Human trafficking  is the  trade  of  humans , most commonly for the purpose of  forced labor ,  sexual slavery , or  commercial sexual exploitation  for the trafficker or others This may encompass providing a  spouse  in the context of  forced marriage , or the extraction of organs or tissues, including for  surrogacy  and  ova  removal Human trafficking can occur within a country or trans-nationally. Human trafficking is a crime against the person because of the violation of the victim’s rights of movement through coercion and because of their commercial  exploitation . Human trafficking is the trade in people, and does not necessarily involve the movement of the person from one place to another.   Human traffic ..

http://www.drjohnaking.com/the-voice/difference-between-human-and-sex-trafficking/

By Dr John A. King

Give Them A Voice Foundation

[fbfeckers-blog]

Held

the sun peeks through the window  as the world wakes

http://www.drjohnaking.com/ptsd-recovery/held/

Poetry by Dr John A. King

[thejasonhype-blog]

In the moonlight

Again he caught himself staring as her dress slides from her shoulders, holding his breath just a little, as he had the first time he saw her naked in the moonlight.

http://www.drjohnaking.com/poetry-and-art/in-the-moonlight/

Poetry by Dr John A. King

[liamkelly86-blog]

the future

Most people who have been through incredibly difficult situations allow those situation to define them for the rest of their lives. To me they seem to revel in the stories of their victimhood, they benefit greatly from them.  Their stories give them excuses, so they don’t have to find reasons. Their stories allow them to bask in the glow of sympathy. Their stories allow them never to take the dangerous steps of journeying into the unknown territory of freedom, love, hope and happiness.

http://www.drjohnaking.com/poetry-and-art/the-future/

Poetry by Dr John A. King

[ptsdcollab]

#Repost @amilyn1223 with @get_repost ・・・ My video review of Deal With It: Living Well With PTSD by @drjohnaking. Thank you for writing this book it has helped me so much. It’s brought clarity to things I just couldn’t get past. #pstd #cptsd #dealwithitbook #dealwithit #drjohnaking #dealwithitbook

[arthuranderson63-blog]

I don’t know

After he had told her of his life,  she softly asked “Does it hurt?”  “I don’t know” he said “I don’t feel it anymore”

http://www.drjohnaking.com/poetry-and-art/dont-know/

Poetry by Dr John A. King

[brysonmaverick-blog]

I am not long for this world

I am not long for this world    So I choose to live and leave it    Full of peace, hope, joy and grace   “I am not long for this world” – Its not a pessimistic statement, just a factual statement. How long do any of us have? We simply just don’t know. If you spend all your time dwelling on the past. Past issues, past failures, past trails, past successes, you never are fully present. if I am not fully present NOW then I have come to realize that I missing the greatest opportunity I have available to me…namely today.  What was done to me has never defined me, it has refined me. I will not leave this world filled with memories of pain, but of peace, not filled with old years of sadness but new years of joy.  I don’t have tomorrow, but I do have today – Dr John A. King

http://www.drjohnaking.com/poetry-and-art/not-long-world/

Poetry by Dr John A. King

[miketurnbull86-blog]

Married teacher mom, 38, accused of letting student touch her breasts.

I have been flooded with emails and comments about what seems to be an ‘increase’ in the sexual abuse of boys by women, to all of those people I have said that is not the case. The sexual abuse of boys by women is about the same as it has always been. However, as a community, we have finally decided to face the issue and bring it into the open. The government has recognized it and agreed to help provide recourses. Organizations like my own have come along and are actively discussing the issue around the world and boys, and men are starting to talk openly about the issue and their experiences.  if you are not spending as much time educating, informing and protecting your sons as you are your daughters, then as parents you are neglectful.   Sara D’Spain   Sara D’Spain, a high school teacher and married mother of two, allegedly let a student touch her breasts behind a restaurant, she told police that she started the relationship with the student through the social media app Snapchat, sending them images of herself.  D’Spain, who apparently complained on multiple social media platforms about her husband spending too much time away at work, admitted to meeting the student. Kerrville police said D’Spain’s arrest is part of an ongoing investigation into two instances of educators in the district having relationships with students. The second investigation continues.  Sexual relationships between educators and students are far from uncommon in Texas. In the 2016-2017 year ..

http://www.drjohnaking.com/the-voice/married-teacher-mom-38-accused-of-letting-student-touch-her-breasts/

[mirandaawesome3-blog]

Guidelines for Difficult Times

Guidelines for difficult times:  Be kind to yourself  Walk softly  Wait before speaking  Measure the grace you desire.

http://www.drjohnaking.com/ptsd-recovery/guidelines-for-difficult-times/

Poetry by Dr John A. King