#deadly assassin

[freelance-liar]

I’ve done a moderately deep dive into why being a Time Lord is so colossally boring

[accessant]

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 266

Back on my Danny & Ras frienemies/rivals/maybe-lovers-nobody-can-tell-their-signals-are-very-mixed train. 

See, Danny has gone through time a lot. Often. It comes with being Clockwork’s charge-son-thing and honestly he finds it fun. And several times he’s used this time travelling to get some training in. Enter Ras, stage left, also a teen at the time and also learning swordsmanship from the same person. 

And they… utterly despise each other. They would kill the other for an apple slice, if the other one would die! But also, only they can kill the other, as it is obviously their right! 

And well, they keep running into each other. It has been a hundred years, surely the other would die by now? But of course their rival would live through utter spite. Probably to spite them specifically. 

The amount of times they have ended up sparring- trying to kill each other or not- the moment they see the other is actually ridiculous. But time is also passing. And… Danny understands, not having another to talk about things people are forgetting, or have already forgotten. 

How they ended up actually talking without a murder attempt was a long story that included a demon, a dragon, a pair of fae, some bandits, and a lot of alcohol, but it happened. And then it happens again. And again, and now it’s just kind of normal to share a drink after their spars, talking about things that no longer exist, and things they miss. 

Sure Danny can go back in time again, but he knows better than to do it willy nilly. He’s matured, he’s been an adult for a hundred years now, he knows there’s consequences for messing with time, even with Clockwork’s blessings. 

The first time they got married was technically for an undercover assassination. Well, Ras was there to assassinate someone, Danny was there to grab an artifact that should Not be in the realm of the living. And they got divorced after, it was fine. 

They just, also got married again when they met a few years later, for another job. And… okay, so maybe they have gotten married over a dozen times now and only divorced like half of those times. Half of those were for the bit or while drunk! 

And even if technically they’re married or shared a bed, it’s not like they're exclusive! As Ras’ daughters’ existences attest to (adopted in one case or not). They don’t exactly have a label for their relationship, despite others asking for one or trying to put a name to it themselves. 

Now Danny knows Ras isn’t exactly a good dude, or at least on the side of ‘good’ as he’s a literal assassin. But he also knows that good? Bad? Rather relative. He had gotten labeled as a villain when he was just trying to help all that time ago after all, and really who was he to tell someone else how to live their life? 

Which brings him to now, where he’s run into his old frienemy-rival and his youngest daughter. Who has a braindead teenager and a small toddler. Which is fine, really- but also, Talia dear, why are you using a brain dead teenager to guard your three year old son? 

…

Okay, Talia dear, Ras (Derogatory), why are you using your brain dead son and grandson to guard your younger son and grandson? Do you not have the Pits, which you were soo proud about Ras? Yes, he will spar with you, but for Realms’ sake, heal, what’s his name? Ah yes, go heal Jason and he’ll actually stick around for a few years, deal? Good. 

[paulgadzikowski]

As I recall, this was the episode that got the militant censorship activist Mary Whitehouse gunning for Doctor Who. She was enough of a pain to the BBC that when the current producer/showrunner/whatever left they told the next guy, "Not so much with the gothic horror, okay? Okay," and he thought, "Well, if I can't be scary, I can be funny," and hired Douglas Adams for story editor/head writer/whatever, and that's where K-9 and TARDIS interiors which look like loading docks and big green blob monsters with phallic appendages came from.

Doctor Who - The Deadly Assassin (1976)

Only seen part 1 in the past, watching them all now and can safely say this might be one of the creepiest moments in whoniverse history.

[grzyb-grzegorz]

more or less what happened

[holmsister]

My closest royal councellor, a 20-something deadly warrior with enchanting blue eyes and uncompromising morals: sorry for saying that thing about assassinating you if you turned out to be evil I made things weird

Me, who got so hard at the idea of being mortally seduced by him during an honeypot scheme to kill me I almost passed out: I think I have food pouisoning

[wintergreenoreo]

Fernando with the black face mask really enhanced his villainous aura.

[foxsoulcourt]

FRIENDS.

Do yourself a favour + read the notes where @cicerfics + @miri-tiazan expand on this post. If you don't loudly guffaw or similar, check yourself for a pulse.

Mooning over these  two gifsets, and I am once again reminded of the fact that the 00Q UST was so freaking BONKERS in SPECTRE. Absolutely out of control.

And I just…

Can you imagine being.

Like.

A random MI6 employee.

You’re just trying to do your job, man. You just wanna finish debugging that new software system. You’re just trying to write up the transcripts for 003′s last mission. You just need to print up a new set of fake French passports for six or seven of the agents.

And Bond and Q are just out there. Flirting. Bantering. Staring raptly into each other’s eyes. Smoldering at each other. Having hushed, fraught conversations. Yearning™.

And I feel like every day, some poor employee is just like, “…Sorry, but you two are Yearning™ right in front of the snack cupboard and I want my digestives. So let me just scootch past ya real quick. Right. Okay. Carry on with all that intense staring, gents. As you were. 🧍“

[laurrelise]

ah, my favorite: five + himself

[giddyaunt425]

I love how the classic Doctors always have to have that himbo episode.

[animeyanderetalker]

Yandere: You look good in that hoodie.

S/O: You know where else I'd look good?

Yandere, zero hesitation: My bed.

S/O, at the same time: By your side- wait, what?

What kinda yandere can you see do this? 😂

I basically browsed through some fandoms I write for quickly in my mind and wrote down whoever popped up in my mind first so I probably missed quite a few characters who could have gone on this list. I'd like to say that this answer can fit people on this list you may not expect to see here if we just change the tone of voice and the facial expressions they use whilst giving this answer. You may for example have the classic person who just teases you with that suggestive grin, loving the way they catch you off-guard with their more dirty-minded answer. You may have the simp who sputters the answer out without even fully thinking about it as their excitement gets the better of them. Maybe even someone whose answer catches you off-guard because you did not think they were that kind of person. The ones who say it so nonchalantly as if they have done this before or the ones who take this question dead serious without realising that you meant to tease them in the first place and bluntly give you an honest answer with a stoic expression. Those are all factors I calculated whilst choosing all those people. You may guess which person fits which option:

Naruto: Hidan, Itachi, Kakashi, Madara, Izuna

Black Butler: Sebastian, Grell, Edgar Redmond

Hunter x Hunter: Chrollo, Shalnark, Uvogin, Hisoka, Shaiapouf, Meruem

My Hero Acadamia: Dabi, Hawks, Toga, Denki

Diabolic Lovers: Shu, Laito, Kou, Shin

Haikyuu!!: Nishinoya, Tanaka, Ukai, Saiko, Kuroo, Oikawa, Kunimi, Futakuchi,Ushijima, Atsumu, Bokuto

Knb: Aomine, Kiae, Izuki, Takao, Imayoshi, Mibuchi, Hanamiya

Fairy Tail: Gajeel, Laxus, Loki, Cobra, Hibiki, Sting

Bungo Stray Dogs: Dazai, Yosano, Mori, Chuuya, Fitzgerald, Mark Twain

Assassination Classroom: Karma, Irina, Maehara, Ren, Gakushu

Seven Deadly Sins: Meliodas, Ban, Derieri, Moonspeet

Kny: Iguro, Rengoku, Tengen, Yushiro, Douma, Daki, Enmu

Jjba: Dio, Caesar, Joseph, DIO, Mariah, Rohan, Mista, Squalo & Tizzano, Risotto, Prosciutto, Melone, Jolyne, Ermes, Anasui,

One Piece: Sanji, Robin, Franky, Shanks, Kid, Ace

Marvel: Deadpool, Wolverine (as portrayed in the first 3 X-Men movies), Tony Stark, Loki, Peter Quill, Hawkeye, Havok, Quicksilver

[krazieka2]

Lil comic about the kind of paralogues the Engage characters could have had hehe

Additional Bunet Paralogue:

[the-worms-in-your-bones]

Imagine being an average Gallifreyan, just minding your own business, watching the news when the president is assassinated. You can’t believe that just happened, but you keep watching because you want to see if they figure out who did it. As you watch you hear some names that sound vaguely familiar. It takes you a while, but you remember where you recognize them from. It’s those two weird kids from the academy that constantly cheated off of each other and one of them blew up your desk once. And now apparently they’re assassinating the president? You hope they don’t show up to the class reunion

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 320

Lazarus Pits are toxic (read practically acidic) to most realms beings. The keyword being most. There are in fact two beings that are immune. 

The first is those with shadow cores, as their cores are quite literally designed to adapt and mirror the aspects of their surroundings alongside anything that may harm them. And those types of ghosts are already rare, most destabilizing when younger because they think they can adapt to something they can’t handle yet. 

The second thing? Halfas. The Pits heal those close to death but who cling to life, and Halfas? Constantly inbetween life and death, no matter what form they take. So something that would normally burn both the living and dead? Does practically nothing to them. In fact? It heals them. 

So a shadow-cored Halfa searching through the zone for a safe spot for his clone-kids to heal? Well, there’s never been a safer place. 

[vertigoartgore]

1986's The Comics Journal #107 cover by artist Bill Sienkiewicz.

[heimeldat]

I've spent an inordinate amount of time parsing the few examples we have of Old High Gallifreyan text, and here at last is the result of my labors!

The Old Gallifreyan alphabet:

The alternate forms of letters may be used interchangeably with their main forms; the differences are purely cosmetic, much like the difference between cursive and print-style writing.

Now for my analysis of the existing texts. It's rather long, so I've put it below the break!

EXAMPLES OF OLD HIGH GALLIFREYAN TEXT

ITEM ONE

Supposedly from “The Five Doctors,” though I can’t spot this writing anywhere. Translation given in episode.

ORA PSYERPA

O – honorific indicating uniqueness, may be rendered with the definite article “the”

R – combined with the definite honorific, a common abbreviation of Rassilon’s name

A – an alternate version of the possessive “ya,” used only when the possessive noun is already abbreviated

Psyerpa – a general term for harps and other large stringed instruments

Thus, the full text reads:

O-Rassilon-ya psyerpa

The Rassilon’s harp

ITEM TWO

From “The Colony in Space,” across the bottom of the Doctor’s mugshot. No translation given.

QU  ETHOA TRIOUAX BRIA

Qu – This is not a complete word, merely a letter used in this case for alphanumerical file designation: note that it stands alone, separate from the main text.

Ethoa – exile

Triouax – an infinitive verb, “to persist” or “to remain in effect”

Bria – a conditional modifier used exclusively in bureaucratic contexts, implying the need for occasional update of information or policy.

This text is a record of the Doctor’s sentence, and may be rendered something like this: Exile: to remain in effect barring further review.

ITEM THREE

From “The Time of Angels.” Translation given.

JUSYMOU CAIDEU OXA OOYY MAISOM

Jusymou – An archaic greeting, roughly equivalent to “well met” or “hail.”

Caideu – self, soul, or “hearts” in a poetic sense

Oxa – prepositional suffix, “part of”

OOYY – a conceptual abbreviation that combines the two meanings of the solitary letter O (definite article + symbol of individuality) and the mathematical use of the letter Y (usually indicating a dimensional shift). Literally, this means something like the individual, shifted two dimensions. In practice, it refers to a Time Lord’s fifth dimensional aspect.

Maisom – name, designation, identification

Thus, a literal translation would read something like this: Greetings, soul-linked fifth-dimensional name!

Or as the Doctor paraphrases it: Hello, Sweetie.

ITEM FOUR

From “The Five Doctors.” Translation is given, though it’s not specified which face of the obelisk corresponds to which section of the text.

First Face:

RA NASA TO TANA EURIFSTAN OBLR ORE NATA

Ra – where

Nasa – sleep

To – in

Tana – lies, reclines, rests

Eurifstan – eternal, endless, timeless. Here it modifies the verb, so it should be rendered as an adverb.

Oblr – abbreviated form of obelar, tomb or grave

OR – the same abbreviation seen previously, “The One And Only Rassilon.”

E – an alternate version of the possessive “ya,” used only when the possessive noun is already abbreviated

Nata – a basic verb of being, is

This yields the following literal translation: Where sleep-in lies eternally, tomb Rassilon’s is.

Or as the Doctor translates it: This is the Tomb of Rassilon, where Rassilon lies in eternal sleep.

Second Face:

The text on the second face is never seen. The Doctor translates it as: Anyone who's got this far has passed many dangers and shown great courage and determination.

Third Face:

ULIREIF RAENATA TOAAN LAKI FSTA TORARO

Ulireif – to lose everything, to be utterly defeated

Raenata – an emphatic form of the being-verb nata, indicating that something really, truly, permanently is

Toa’an – to win everything, to be crowned victor

Laki – a compound conjunction combining la (so) with ki (and): “and so”

Fsta – an abbreviated form of festoa, a winner or leader

Toraro – future tense of torar, to fail or collapse

Thus: To lose all is truly to win all, and so the winner will fail.

Or as the Doctor puts it: To lose is to win, and he who wins shall lose.

Fourth Face:

KIRA ATOUNA OR TA LIRI EUKI RAATO SUTE ANAAN FEIRLIO REUNT

Kira – takes

Atouna – ring

OR – the same abbreviation seen previously, “The One And Only Rassilon.”

Ta – from

Liri – hand

Euki – a compound conjunction combining eu (then, next, afterward) with ki (and): “and then”

Ra’ato – future tense of ra’at, to wear

Sute – reward, prize, payment

Ana’an – desired, sought-after

Feirlio – future tense of feiril, to get or acquire. Note that this is an irregular verb: the last two letters switch places when adding any tense ending.

Reunt – immortality, eternity

Literally: Takes ring Rassilon-from-hand and then will wear, reward-sought will have: immortality.

Or as the Doctor translates it: Whoever takes the ring from Rassilon's hand and puts it on shall get the reward he seeks: immortality.