#david rose/rebecca bunch

[hullomoon]

hullomoon’s 2022 works: part one

it’s the end of the year, which means it’s time for a work round-up! this year i really tipped into being podfic heavy (and more multifandom!). if you haven’t yet, check out my 2019 roundup, 2020 roundup, and 2021 roundup! all works are ordered in chronological posting order.

part one | part two | part three | part four | part five | part six | part seven | part eight

i rule with the velvet tongue | Schitt’s Creek | Steve/Ruth | explicit | 789

Ruth takes Stevie apart 

[podfic] Natural Selection | Schitt’s Creek | David/Patrick | 0:32:31

David is a penguin. Obviously so is Patrick given that human-penguin pairings are rarely successful in business together, much less romantically in business together.

[podfic] twist yourself around me | Schitt’s Creek & Crazy Ex-Girlfriend | David/Rebecca | multivoice | 0:10:27

He’s seen her here before, he’s pretty sure, but this time, her friends have left her sitting alone, having wandered off to dance or drink or fuck. His friends have done the same, and he’s just drunk enough and lonely enough to approach her. Not that he never approaches strangers in the clubs. On the contrary, he does it with enough frequency that it would be alarming if he stopped to think about it (so he never stops to think about it). Those interactions, though, rarely involve many words, all sweaty bodies and hands and tongues. Something about this woman makes him want to strike up a conversation. So he slides into the seat across from her.

[podfic] kiss me beneath the mistletoe | Schitt’s Creek | Alexis/Twyla | multivoice | 0:12:58

twyla’s body magically produces plants whenever she feels any strong emotion, but she has it completely under control. that is, until she meets alexis rose. now what is she supposed to do with all these roses?

[Podfic] Through Someone Else’s Eyes | Schitt’s Creek | Alexis & David | multivoice | ~0:27:00

It’s all Mr Hockley’s fault.

The tea was supposed to get him high, not make him wake up in his sister’s body.

[Podfic] a lifetime of promises | Schitt’s Creek | David/Patrick | multivoice | 06:06

Their wedding song is playing at Brebner’s.

No, not their wedding song; their song. Not that David would ever try to claim the downright divine masterpieces of Tina Turner — he generally believes that couples having “songs” is cheesy and off-putting — but dammit, if anyone earned a song, this song, it’s him and Patrick.

—

or, sometimes you have a mini breakdown in the ice cream aisle of the supermarket, and that’s okay

Crawl Before You Can Walk | Schitt’s Creek | David/Patrick | 10:18

The continuing adventures of Ted the Turtle.

but it’s golden | Schitt’s Creek | Rachel/Heather | ~3.1k

Rachel knew that going back to Schitt's Creek meant she'd see Heather again. What she didn't expect was spending the weekend with her.

Femslash February: Chapter One | Schitt’s Creek | Alexis/Ruth | 100

rainbow

Femslash February: Chapter 8 | Schitt’s Creek | Ronnie/Moira | 100

fashion

[stereopticons]

twist yourself around me [david rose/rebecca bunch, T, 1.6k]

published 12/16/2021

podfic by hullomoon, Amanita_Fierce, oakleaf, thesleepyskipper, and sunlightsymphony

He’s seen her here before, he’s pretty sure, but this time, her friends have left her sitting alone, having wandered off to dance or drink or fuck. His friends have done the same, and he’s just drunk enough and lonely enough to approach her. Not that he never approaches strangers in the clubs. On the contrary, he does it with enough frequency that it would be alarming if he stopped to think about it (so he never stops to think about it). Those interactions, though, rarely involve many words, all sweaty bodies and hands and tongues. Something about this woman makes him want to strike up a conversation. So he slides into the seat across from her.

Or: the angsty pre-canon SC/CXG crossover that no one asked for!

[jewish-ship-showdown]

Ships that have already qualified (read before submitting):

Jude Lizowski/Jonesy Garcia

Tyler Kennedy "TK" Strand/Carlos Reyes

Peter Parker (Spider-Man)/Gwen Stacey

Willow Rosenberg/Winifred "Fred" Burkle

Francine Frensky/Muffy Crosswire

Susan Ivanova/Marcus Cole

Kate Kane (Batwoman)/Renee Montoya

Barry B. Benson/Vanessa Bloome

Jake Peralta/Amy Santiago

Willow Rosenberg/Tara Maclay

Jack Zimmermann/Eric "Bitty" Bittle

Justin "Ransom" Oluransi/Adam "Holster" Birkholtz

Danny/Reuven

Larissa "Lara" Bogdan/Jasmine

Kelsey Pokly/Isabella "Stacks" Alvarado

Rebecca Bunch/Audra Levine

Rebecca Bunch/Greg Serrano

Rebecca Bunch/Nathaniel Plimpton

Samantha "Sam" Manson/Danniel "Danny" Fenton

Bruce Wayne (Batman)/Selina Kyla (Catwoman)

Bruce Wayne (Batman)/Clark Kent (Superman)

Clark Kent (Superman)/Lois Lane

Harley Quinn/Pamela Isley (Poison Ivy)

Barney Guttman/Logan Nguyen

Leah/Chanan

Shay Goldstein/Dominic Yun

Marvin/Whizzer

Trina/Mendel Weisenbachfeld

Perchik/Hodel

Tzeitel/Motel

Monica Gellar/Chandler Bing

Molly McGee/Libby Stein Torres

Rachel Berry/Noah Puckerman

Fiddleford McGucket/Stanford Pines

Cristina Yang/Owen Hunt

Cristina Yang/Preston Burke

Levi Schmidt/Nico Kim

Rose Lalonde/Kanaya Maryam

James Wilson/Gregory House

The Baker and/The Baker's Wife

Kim Possible/Ron Stoppable

The Jewish People/The Shabbat Bride

Alec Hardison/Parker

Max Eisenhardt (Magneto)/Charles Xavier (Professor X)

Steve Rogers (Captain America)/James "Bucky" Barnes

Arnold "Arnie" Roth/Michael Bech

Arnold "Arnie" Roth/Steve Rogers (Captain America)

Billy Kaplan (Wiccan)/Teddy Altman (Hulkling)

Bobby Drake (Iceman)/Hank McCoy (Beast)

Bobby Drake (Iceman)/Johnny Storm (The Human Torch)

Layla El Faouly/Mark Spector (Moon Knight)

Matthew Hawk (Two-Gun Kid II)/Clint Barton (Hawkeye)

Peter Parker (Spider-Man)/Betty Brant

Peter Parker (Spider-Man)/Eugene "Flash" Thompson

Peter Parker (Spider-Man)/ Felicia Hardy

Peter Parker (Spider-Man)/ Harry Osborn

Peter Parker (Spider-Man)/Katherine Anne "Kitty" Pryde

Peter Parker (Spider-Man)/Mary Jane "MJ" Watson

Peter Parker (Spider-Man)/Wade Wilson (Deadpool)

Steve Rogers/Bernadette "Bernie" Rosenthal

Wanda Maximoff/The Vision

Midge Maisel/Susie Myerson

Hal Emmerich (Otacon)/Solid Snake

Casey Goldberg-Calderon/Lunella Lafayette

Fran Fine/Max Sheffield

Ben Gross/Devi Vishwakumar

Winston Schmidt/Cece Parekh

David Jacobs/Jack Kelly

Seth Cohen/Summer Roberts

Scout Touzani/Elias Wyrick

KJ Brandman/Mac Coyle

Lavinia Asimov/Poison Oak

Phineas Flynn/Isabella Garcia-Shapiro

Anon's Mom/Dad

The person reading this & their partner

Jerry Seinfeld/Cosmo Kramer

Simon Lewis/Isabel Lightwood

Danielle/Maya

Bram Greenfeld/Simon Spier

Miryem Mandelstam/The Staryk King

David Rose/Patrick Brewer

James T Kirk/S'chn T'gai Spock

Worf Rozhenko/Jadzia Dax

Kanan Jarrus/Hera Syndulla

Brian Jeeter/Krejjh

Bobby Singer/Rufus Turner

Jonah Simms/Amy Sosa

Reish Lakish/Rabbi Yochanen

King David/Yonatan

Devorah/Barak

Moses/Tzipporah

Ruth/Naomi

Yaakov/The Angel

Rowan Roth/Neil Mcnair

Klaus Hargreeves/Dave Katz

Cecil Palmer/Carlos The Scientist

Josh Lyman/Donna Moss

Little Ash/Uriel

Lucille "Lucy" Kensington/Dr. Edison "Ed" Tucker

Fox Mulder/Dana Scully

Anshel/Avigdor

Alec Hardison/Parker/Eliot Spencer

Wanda Maximoff (The Scarlet Witch)/Jericho Drumm

Bruce Wayne (Batman)/Shondra Kinsolving

Bruce Wayne (Batman)/Talia Al Ghul

Ben Grimm (The Thing)/Alicia Masters

Velma Dinkley/Daphne Blake

Velma Dinkley/Marcie Fleach

Didi Pickles/Stu Pickles

Velma Dinkley/Coco Diablo

Babushka (Tatiana)/Dedushka (Ivan)

Kitty Pryde/Illyana Rasputin

Natasha Romanoff/Wanda Maximoff

Marc Spector (Moon Knight)/Clint Barton (Hawkeye)

Hillel/Shammai

S'chn T'gai Spock/James T Kirk/Dr. Leonard "Bones" McCoy

S'chn T'gai Spock/Dr. Leonard "Bones" McCoy

Frankie Bergstein/Grace Hanson

Annie Edison/Jeff Winger

Maxine Myers/Paula Cohen

Baby Houseman/Johnny Castle

Tevye/Golde

Michael "Mike" Wazowski/Celia Mae

Talmudic couple having gay sex in the attic

Tim Drake/Kon El (Conner Kent)

Violet Baudelaire/Quigley Quagmire

Reuben Kent/Feliks Kaufmann

Anshel/Avigdor/Hadass

Amram/Zelikman

Anshel/Hadass

SUBMISSIONS ARE OPEN UNTIL MAY 8, 2023 @ 12:00 AM EDT

[periru3]

Festivids Rec List, But Make It Horny (part 2)

This is part two of my horny festivids rec list I felt compelled to make for some reason. You can find part 1 here.

8. Alone With You Inside My Mind (Doctor Sleep) Unlike the Bound vids and Janelle Monáe vids, I had to put this one very far from the other Rebecca Ferguson thirst vid on accounts of that one being about a person being hot and this one being about a child-eating monster being hot. Yes, this is a (freaking hysterical) crack vid about Rose the Hat saying “hi there” a bunch, but also it’s legitimately spooky and sexy at the same time, which is quite a feat. Anyway this one is at #8 because no matter how normal she looks, this is still a monster-fucker vid. And that is good. 7. Put on a Show (Wheel of Time) Another vid where I very much do not know what’s going on, but the femdom energy here is off the charts. There’s choking, there’s tying boys up while you sit in a throne and look down on them, there’s blowing things up with magic, and there’s a hell of a lot of whoever this lady is walking around looking imperious and hot. Whatever these folks have going on, it’s more than enough to land them in the kinkier half of this list.    6. She’s a Lady & I’m Gonna Make You Love Me (Christine) Alright so one could certainly argue that these vids aren’t actually horny, and that’s fair. But I won’t beat around the bush: the fact of the matter is whether or not we as viewers are horny for her, Arnie wants to fuck his serial killer car. As far as monster-fucking Stephen King vids of this year go, while these may be a less sexy vid than the Rose one, the whole “wanting to fuck a car” thing definitely pushes it higher up on the kinky, bizarre, and fucked up scales than Alone With You Inside My Mind. 5. Ángel (Tár) Alright so this one is a toughie. It’s a beautiful character study, it’s dark and intense and creepy, it’s at times honestly quite sexy, and it’s also about a sexual predator. So. Finding parts of the vid hot is more than a little uncomfortable. Obviously themes of sex pervade the vid, though it’s unclear to me whether describing it as a “horny vid” is totally fair. This absolutely stunning vid lands the #5 spot on pure fucked-upness. 4. Dream Girl Evil (Last Night in Soho) Speaking of fucked up vids with non-con elements that aren’t necessarily supposed to be sexy so much as dealing with themes of sexuality, here’s a really cool Last Night in Soho vid! Look, this vid is listed as M/F and Gen, and I’m not here to question the vidder’s intent. But also, friends, let’s be real: there is a weird psychosexual undercurrent to Ellie’s obsession with Sandie. And this is really heightened by the sexy song that includes the lyrics “did mommy make you mad?” in a real sultry voice. Anyway, suddenly finding yourself inside someone else’s body and becoming obsessed with them is inherently homoerotic….. SPEAKING OF WHICH… 3. Anymore (Face/Off) …FACE/OFF!!! I can see people watching this vid and not thinking it’s that horny…. But I, the vid recipient and an intellectual, know otherwise. Listen, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: suddenly finding yourself inside someone else’s body and becoming obsessed with them is inherently homoerotic! And also fucked up and bizarre! God this vid has so much going on. There’s face swapping. There’s face licking (biting?). There’s shoot offs. There’s doves. It’s tagged “Sean Archer/Castor Troy” and also “enemies to enemies. ” What a delight. 2. Blood in the Cut (Taskmaster RPF) This is a vid about what a little freak Little Alex Horne is and honestly that is a genre of content I literally always want more of. There’s blood, wax, jealousy, humiliation, bondage – all the things that make Taskmaster great. Very horny. Very weird. Very kinky. It’s almost hard to imagine anyone beating Alex Horne for the freakiest freak of festivids award…….. 1. Body (David Cronenberg) …..Except that someone made me a fucking David Cronenberg vid!!!!!!! I’m not even gonna say more on this one, I’ll just leave you with the tags: “body horror, but make it hot”

Anyway, my three gifts are flawless and I’m also obviously very here for all the other thirsty content this festivids as well. I might be back with an actual rec list at some point. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

(Part 1)

[mylifeincinema]

My Week(s) in Reviews: March 9, 2024

My brain is already on the Oscars, so these may be even quicker than usual...

Dune: Part Two (Denis Villeneuve, 2024)

I too would immediately forget Zendaya exists the second Florence Pugh walked in the room. Aside from some issues with the pacing that are probably rather nit-picky (some scenes felt rushed while others seemed to draaaaaag), this was a technical beast. Once again, the casting is just stellar, and the cinematography and VFX are straight-up stunning. Crazy cult-leader-villain Rebecca Ferguson is always the best Rebecca Ferguson. (I'd follow Rose the Hat to the depths of hell.) This is a much more action-heavy piece compared to the first, and it's significantly better for it. The chosen-one stuff is interesting, but not as interesting as the struggle for control over Arrakis. Really, the only things I really didn't love were those pacing issues and the fact that Florence Pugh & Christopher Walken didn't have more screen-time. Yeah, not much else to say, specifically. - 9/10

Nimona (Nick Bruno & Troy Quane, 2023)

Had a bunch of fun with it, but the changes made from the graphic novel really weren't for the better, and the movie Nimona is significantly more annoying. - 7/10

Hypnotic (Robert Rodriguez, 2023)

Awful. Terrible. Truly embarrassing on every single level. What's even worse, is that the entire cast seems to know this, and watching them try to make sense of their garbage decisions and dialogue is so, so painful. - 1/10

Wonka (Paul King, 2023)

I had a few minor issues with some of the songs and several decisions Chalamet made, but overall this was pretty damn delightful. In general, the cast is having a blast in the most entertaining and interesting way possible, and King knows how to deliver a visually exciting family film. I really wish we didn't lose him for Paddington 3. - 8/10

I also revisited some other Villeneuve films. Dune: Part One in prep for the second one... which I enjoyed significantly more this time around. Then the night after seeing Part Two, I did a double feature of Sicario and Blade Runner 2049. Sicario is every bit as good as it was the several previous times I'd seen it. It's truly a masterful piece of cinema. Blade Runny 2049 wasn't quite as good. It's still pretty damn amazing, but there were some pacing issues that were significantly more apparent this time around. I also revisited David Fincher's Se7en as a palate cleanser after Hypnotic. So damn good, every single time. Then I followed Wonka with the masterpiece that is Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory. Thankfully, this decision didn't make me enjoy Wonka less like I'd worried it might.

Also, I'll be posting my Official Academy Award Predictions either sometime later tonight or tomorrow afternoon. Stay Tuned!

Enjoy!

-Timothy Patrick Boyer.

[indestructibleheart]

NICE ASK WEEK! If you could make a list of the top fictional characters that all combine to describe you and your spirit, your soul characters, who would they be and why?

Aww, I love this question.

You know #1 is Henry Fox + and his mile of names I'm not typing. He's been one of my soul characters since I first met him, but after my dad died... Yeah, I found a whole new reason to connect with him and the way that his grief has become this Part of him. I aspire to be like him, though, with his indestructible heart and his refusal to let the cruelty he's been shown and his losses harden him. There's also the way he protects himself from pain, the connection he feels to literature, and his love for writing. We're also both runners. We run when we're scared or when we can't cope. Yeah.

David Rose is another one that I connected to immediately... for a lot of the same reasons. He also protects himself from pain in a similar way, and I have his deep trust issues and abandonment issues. He's self-deprecating while also being vain, like me, lol. He's so selfless when it comes to the people he loves, but he'll never admit it. We also have very similar mannerisms lmao. I have literally smacked someone in the face while gesticulating before.

They're my #2 forever. My ride or dies. They're also both men, which is a little strange and something I do not wish to analyze.

I also see so much of myself and my neuroses in Rebecca Bunch from Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, my tenacity and quest for knowledge in Julia Wicker from The Magicians (before the show went to shit), my people-pleasing tendencies and Need to be Liked in Blaine Anderson from that other show that went to absolute shit, and my loving, protective nature in Piper Halliwell from the original Charmed.

[wearpersistencewell]

Okay, let's do this. I ended up deleting questions I didn't have interesting responses for, but you can see the whole thing below.

Who is/are your comfort character(s)? Leslie Knope and Ben Wyatt and David Rose and Patrick Brewer. I realize the question was characters and not pairings, but those couples are like hot chocolate on a cold day to me. And I'm not even a romantic person. (I'm really not.) Which cryptyd being do you believe in? I sometimes wonder if the Yeti is actually another species of human, but I don't really believe that. It's just an idea. Why did you do that? To paraphrase Rebecca Bunch, a genetic predisposition for anxiety and ADHD.

Favorite extracurricular activity? Oh, I'm... not in school anymore. I'm a tumblr old, I think. LOL. What kind of day is it? Deceptively sunny. Do you say soda or pop? Neither, to be honest. I just say the name of the product. Or "soft drink."

What type of person are you? Um. INFP? I'm somehow both very open and very closed off. Nothing matters to me more than my friends and family, but I love being alone. I try to see the best in everyone and am generally "you do you," but I also have strong opinions about both everyday things and social justice. I'm spiritual and probably closest to Christian, but too skeptical for organized religion.

How do you like your shower water? Oh, if it were healthy and ecologically friendly, my bathroom would be a sauna by the time I finished up. Alas, it is neither of those things.

here’s weirder asks

who is/are your comfort character(s)?

lighter or matches?

do you leave the window open at night?

which cryptyd being do you believe in?

what color are your eyes?

why did you do that?

hair-ties or scrunchies?

how many water bottles are in your room right now?

which do you prefer, hot coffee or cold coffee?

would you slaughter the rich?

favorite extracurricular activity?

what kind of day is it?

when was the last time you ate?

do you love the smell of earth after it rains?

are you a parent? (all answers qualify)

can you drive?

are you farsighted or nearsighted?

what hair products do you use?

imagine we’re at a sleepover, would you paint my nails?

do you say soda or pop?

something you’ve kept since childhood?

what type of person are you?

how do you feel about chilly weather?

if we were together on a rooftop, what would we be doing?

perfume/body spray or lotion?

a scenario that you’ve replayed multiple times?

about how many hours of sleep did you get?

do you wear a mask?

how do you like your shower water?

is there dishes in your room?

what type of music keeps you grounded?

do you have a favorite towel?

the last adventure you’ve been on?

is there a song you know every word to by heart?

what’s your timezone?

how many times have you changed your url?

someone in your life, other than a relative, you’ve known for 10+ years?

a soap bar that smells good?

do you use lip balm?

did you have any snacks today?

how do you take your coffee?

an app you frequently use besides this godforsaken site?

what’s your take on spicy foods?

you get a free pass to kill anyone, who is it?

can you remember what happened yesterday?

favorite holiday film?

what was the last message you sent?

when did you first try an alcohol beverage?

can you skip rocks?

can i tag you in random stuff?

[top100countdown]

TOP 100 COOLEST PEOPLE OF ALL-TIME

TOP 100 COOLEST PEOPLE

Done: 2024

DUFF MCKAGEN Guns N Roses

Wednesday Addams THE ADDAMS FAMILY

Kurt Cobain

Shirley Manson GARBAGE

Neil Young

Roger Smith/Roger the alien AMERICAN DAD!

PJ Harvey

Amy Winehouse

Oscar the Grouch SESAME STREET

ANDY WARHOL

LL Cool J

Frida Kahlo

Joan Jett

Iggy Pop

Courtney Love

Lenny Kravitz

Gwen Stefani

Lana Del Rey

Kate Bush

MADONNA

Heather Matarazzo

Animal THE MUPPETS

Emily the Strange

Johnny Cash

Queen Akasha QUEEN OF THE DAMNED

Dracula

Jimi Hendrix

Patsy Stone ABSOLUTELY FABULOUS

Vampires

Axel Foley BEVERLY HILLS COP

Eric Draven THE CROW

Nick Cave

Slash GUNS N ROSES

David Bowie

Han Solo STAR WARS

T- REX Tyrannosaurus

Bette Davis

Fonzie HAPPY DAYS

Olenna Tyrell GAME OF THRONES

STEPHEN KING

Curt Wild VELVET GOLDMINE

Frank N Furter ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW

Trent Reznor NINE INCH NAILS

The Blues Brothers

Suzi Quatro

Bob Dylan

Bob Marley

Clive Warren and Rebecca De Mornay

Chrissy Amphlett DIVINYLS

Miss Agatha Hannigan ANNIE

The Dude THE BIG LEBOWSKI

John Rambo RAMBO

Pirates

Dr. Evil AUSTIN POWERS

John McClane DIE HARD

Negan THE WALKING DEAD

Vasquez ALIENS

Alice Nelson THE BRADY BUNCH

Eddie Murphie

JOHN WICK John Wick

Plucka Duck HEY HEY IT’S SATURDAY

Disco Stu THE SIMPSONS

John Malkovich

Neanderthals

Tyrion Lannister GAME OF THRONES

The Bride KILL BILL

Mahatma Gandhi

Judy Davis

Betty Rizzo GREASE

DENISE BRYSON Twin Peaks

Jeff Goldblum

Nancy Downs THE CRAFT

Trent Lane DARIA

Candy Darling

Floki VIKINGS

Jules Winnfield PULP FICTION

Terminator TERMINATOR SERIES

Daryl Dixon THE WALKING DEAD

Johanna Mason THE HUNGER GAMES

Natalie Imbruglia

Susan DESPERATELY SEEKING SUSAN

Carol Peletier THE WALKING DEAD

Garfield

Juliette Lewis

Samuel L. Jackson

Chef SOUTH PARK

Gogo Yubari KILL BILL

Kathy Burke

Sheev Palpatine / The Emperor STAR WARS

CHRISTOPHER HITCHENS

Heather Mooney ROMY & MICHELE’S HIGH SCHOOL REUNION

Lisbeth Salander GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO

Skeletor HE-MAN

Cookie Monster SESAME STREET

Ian Malcolm JURASSIC PARK

Martians MARS ATTACKS

Steve Irwin

Creed Bratton THE OFFICE

Jack Nicholson

Martin Luther King Jr.

[scraregenrecs]

SC Reading Challenge Angst Recs

Looking for angst? We've got some works for you! Here's another rec list for the reading prompts in @screadingchallenge. Grab the tissues and get reading!

Angst

Aeration (Alexis, T, by @middyblue)

always the one you call (David, Alexis, T, by bytheseas)

(at least i'm) trying (Alexis/Ted, Alexis/Mutt, NR, by @anniemurphys)

Boys don't wear makeup (Patrick, G, by @myolivebranch)

Choosing So Carefully (Stevie/Ruth, E, by @sarahlevys)

don’t have many good reasons to leave my room (i did most things to get to you) (Rachel/Twyla, Alexis & Twyla, T, by @turningtimeinthetardis)

Gutted (David, Alexis, Moira, Johnny, T, by @wearpersistencewell)

honey, i love you (that's all she wrote) (Alexis/Ted, NR, by @anniemurphys)

I Can't Stand the Rain(e) (David/Jake, T, by @brrose-apothecary)

I Hold a Rose in the Palm of my Hand (Patrick/Rachel, G, by @seldom-what-i-seem)

I weigh a hundredandfuckingsomething pounds (that makes me almost good) (Alexis/Twyla, G, by @andtheydancedbythelightofthemoon)

I'm no aesthete (Patrick & Rachel, T, by firmandfruity)

I'm Not Sorry It's Over (Patrick/Rachel, M, by @doublel27)

Imposter Syndrome (Stevie/Alexis, E, by @petrodobreva)

Leader of the Landslide (Stevie/Twyla, T, by @doublel27)

Learn To Live On Less (David, Alexis, T, by @chronologicalimplosion)

like glass from sandy ground (Alexis/Twyla, M, by @middyblue)

live again (and love again) (Stevie/David, T, by strangeluvz)

lost in the woods (Patrick, T, by @dessertwaffles)

Memory Lane (or How To Steal From Your Ex-Almost-In-Laws) (Rachel, Patrick, and the Brewers, T, by @treepyful)

only if you let me (Alexis/Twyla, T, by @plainest)

recognize my role, i fucked up the timing (gonna pay dearly for years full of silence) (Alexis/Ted, Alexis/Twyla, T, by @turningtimeinthetardis)

The darkest hour is just before dawn (Alexis/Ted, M, by @petrodobreva)

The Seasons of Our Life (Stevie/Twyla, G, by @treepyful)

twist yourself around me (David/Rebecca Bunch [Crazy Ex-Girlfriend crossover], T, by @stereopticons—with podfic by Amanita_Fierce, @hullomoon, oakleaf, @thesleepyskipper, @sunlightsymphony) 

When Our Nerves Ain't Shot and Our Hands Don't Shake (Alexis/Twyla, T, by perkalil)

Where'd Everybody Go (Stevie, G, by @doublel27)

You Are David Rose. (David, T, by @midnightstreet)

[hullomoon]

[podfic] twist yourself around me

written by: @stereopticons

read by: @hullomoon, @sunlightsymphony, @oakleaffic, and @thesleepyskipper

cover art by: Amanita_Fierce

He’s seen her here before, he’s pretty sure, but this time, her friends have left her sitting alone, having wandered off to dance or drink or fuck. His friends have done the same, and he’s just drunk enough and lonely enough to approach her. Not that he never approaches strangers in the clubs. On the contrary, he does it with enough frequency that it would be alarming if he stopped to think about it (so he never stops to think about it). Those interactions, though, rarely involve many words, all sweaty bodies and hands and tongues. Something about this woman makes him want to strike up a conversation. So he slides into the seat across from her.

Or: the angsty pre-canon SC/CXG crossover that no one asked for!

 [podfic of twist yourself around me]

[stereopticons]

fic rec friday

Original rules: Share your top fics no matter how big or small - give us the links to your wonderful words with the Most hits/Most kudos/Most comments/Most bookmarks /Most words/Least words

My addition is to add also share your fics with the least hits/kudos/comments/bookmarks to give them some love!

Thanks for the tag, @hippolotamus!

Most hits: the lie between your teeth (david/patrick, M, 48k) - AU in which David and Patrick meet via a dating app, or the answer to the question, "what if David's 79-mile-away match from 2x07 was actually Patrick?"

Least hits: your secret's safe with me (stevie/ruth, david/patrick, david & stevie, M, 3k) - Stevie enlists David's help to plan a surprise party for Ruth. It goes about as well as one would expect.

Most kudos: the lie between your teeth, runner up: if i'm not beyond repair (david/patrick, M, 8k) - A year after Patrick and David break up, Patrick gets a call from the hospital. Turns out he's still David's emergency contact.

Least kudos: as close as pages in a book (stevie/ruth, T, 3k) - Stevie runs a used bookstore in Schitt's Creek, and Ruth is new in town. Five times Ruth comes in to ask for a book from Stevie, and one time she brings Stevie one of her own.

Most comments: sweater weather (david/patrick, twyla/alexis, T, 15k) - 30 loosely connected fall-themed post-canon drabbles

Least comments: the world would make sense again (if i held your hand) (twyla/alexis, T, 2.7k) - Twyla finally tries to get over her fear of flying to go visit Alexis. Alexis tries to make it easier for her.

Most bookmarks: also the lie between your teeth, runner up: love you in moderation (do i look moderate to you?) (david/patrick, E, 7k) - yet another take on the Night at Stevie's.

Least bookmarks: twist yourself around me (david rose/rebecca bunch, T, 1.6k) - the angsty pre-canon SC/CXG crossover that no one asked for!

Most words: also also the lie between your teeth, runner up: so bitter and so sweet (david/patrick, E, 27k) - Still reeling from a bad breakup and a professional setback, David moves to Schitt’s Creek and takes a job at Stevie’s coffee shop. He’s definitely not looking for love in this tiny town, but a cute customer in mid-range denim offering business advice might just change his mind.

Least words: Making it Official (david/patrick, T, 400) - David and Patrick fill out their marriage license application and learn some surprising facts about each other.

Tagging @rosedavid @alienajackson @jettestar @petalwritesx @blackandwhiteandrose @mostlyinthemorning @apothecarose

[jewish-ship-showdown]

QUALIFYING SHIPS UNDER THE CUT

Send me an ask or direct message if 🠺 You feel that any ship shouldn't be on here and explain why 🠺 You have any questions at all 🠺 You just want to say hi

Jude Lizowski/Jonesy Garcia

Tyler Kennedy "TK" Strand/Carlos Reyes

Peter Parker (Spider-Man)/Gwen Stacey

Willow Rosenberg/Winifred "Fred" Burkle

Francine Frensky/Muffy Crosswire

Luna Armoza/Matilda Franco

Susan Ivanova/Marcus Cole

Barry B. Benson/Vanessa Bloome

Michael Mell/Jeremy Heere

Jake Peralta/Amy Santiago

Willow Rosenberg/Tara Maclay

Jack Zimmermann/Eric "Bitty" Bittle

Justin "Ransom" Oluransi/Adam "Holster" Birkholtz

Danny/Reuven

Annie Edison/Jeff Winger

Larissa "Lara" Bogdan/Jasmine

Kelsey Pokly/Isabella "Stacks" Alvarado

Rebecca Bunch/Audra Levine

Rebecca Bunch/Greg Serrano

Rebecca Bunch/Nathaniel Plimpton

Samantha "Sam" Manson/Danniel "Danny" Fenton

Bruce Wayne (Batman)/Clark Kent (Superman)

Bruce Wayne( Batman)/Minkhoa Khan (Ghostmaker)

Bruce Wayne (Batman)/Selina Kyla (Catwoman)

Bruce Wayne (Batman)/Shondra Kinsolving

Bruce Wayne (Batman)/Talia Al Ghul

Clark Kent (Superman)/Lois Lane

Harley Quinn/Pamela Isley (Poison Ivy)

Kate Kane (Batwoman)/Renee Montoya

Martha Kane/Thomas Wayne/Alfred Pennyworth

Tim Drake/Kon El (Conner Kent)

Barney Guttman/Logan "Logs" Nguyen

Baby Houseman/Johnny Castle

Leah/Chanan

Shay Goldstein/Dominic Yun

Marvin/Whizzer

Trina/Mendel Weisenbachfeld

Perchik/Hodel

Tevye/Golde

Tzeitel/Motel

Monica Gellar/Chandler Bing

Amram/Zelikman

Molly McGee/Libby Stein Torres

Rachel Berry/Noah Puckerman

Frankie Bergstein/Grace Hanson

Fiddleford McGucket/Stanford Pines

Cristina Yang/Owen Hunt

Cristina Yang/Preston Burke

Levi Schmidt/Nico Kim

Rose Lalonde/Kanaya Maryam

James Wilson/Gregory House

Ashlyn Caswell/Big Red

The Baker and/The Baker's Wife

Kim Possible/Ron Stoppable

Ellie Williams/Dina

The Jewish People/The Shabbat Bride

Alec Hardison/Parker

Alec Hardison/Parker/Eliot Spencer

Arnold "Arnie" Roth/Michael Bech

Arnold "Arnie" Roth/Steve Rogers (Captain America)

Ben Grimm (The Thing)/Alicia Masters

Billy Kaplan (Wiccan)/Teddy Altman (Hulkling)

Bobby Drake (Iceman)/Hank McCoy (Beast)

Bobby Drake (Iceman)/Johnny Storm (The Human Torch)

Katherine Anne "Kitty" Pryde/Illyana Rasputin (Magik)

Layla El Faouly/Marc Spector (Moon Knight)

Matthew Hawk (Two-Gun Kid II)/Clint Barton (Hawkeye)

Marc Spector (Moon Knight)/Clint Barton (Hawkeye)

Max Eisenhardt (Magneto)/Charles Xavier (Professor X)

Natasha Romanoff/Wanda Maximoff

Peter Parker (Spider-Man)/Betty Brant

Peter Parker (Spider-Man)/Eugene "Flash" Thompson

Peter Parker (Spider-Man)/ Felicia Hardy (Black Cat)

Peter Parker (Spider-Man)/Harry Osborn

Peter Parker (Spider-Man)/Katherine Anne "Kitty" Pryde

Peter Parker (Spider-Man)/Mary Jane "MJ" Watson

Peter Parker (Spider-Man)/Wade Wilson (Deadpool)

Steve Rogers/Bernadette "Bernie" Rosenthal

Steve Rogers (Captain America)/James "Bucky" Barnes

Wanda Maximoff (The Scarlet Witch)/Jericho Drumm

Wanda Maximoff (The Scarlet Witch)/The Vision

Midge Maisel/Susie Myerson

Hal Emmerich (Otacon)/Solid Snake

Michael "Mike" Wazowski/Celia Mae

Casey Goldberg-Calderon/Lunella Lafayette

Fran Fine/Max Sheffield

Ben Gross/Devi Vishwakumar

Winston Schmidt/Cece Parekh

David Jacobs/Jack Kelly

Seth Cohen/Summer Roberts

Reuben Kent/Feliks Kaufmann

Scout Touzani/Elias Wyrick

KJ Brandman/Mac Coyle

Lavinia Asimov/Poison Oak

Phineas Flynn/Isabella Garcia-Shapiro

Anon's Mom/Dad

Babushka (Tatiana)/Dedushka (Ivan)

Hillel/Shammai

The person reading this & their partner

Didi Pickles/Stu Pickles

Captain Rivka Maror/Isaac The Wizard

Shulamit/Aviva

Jerry Seinfeld/Cosmo Kramer

Violet Baudelaire/Quigley Quagmire

Simon Lewis/Isabel Lightwood

Danielle/Maya

Bram Greenfeld/Simon Spier

Miryem Mandelstam/The Staryk King

David Rose/Patrick Brewer

Velma Dinkley/Daphne Blake

Velma Dinkley/Marcie "Hot Dog Water" Fleach

S'chn T'gai Spock/James T Kirk

S'chn T'gai Spock/James T Kirk/Leonard "Bones" McCoy

S'chn T'gai Spock/Leonard "Bones" McCoy

Worf Rozhenko/Jadzia Dax

Kanan Jarrus/Hera Syndulla

Brian Jeeter/Krejjh

Bobby Singer/Rufus Turner

Jonah Simms/Amy Sosa

Reish Lakish/Rabbi Yochanen

Couple having gay sex in the study hall attic (Talmud)

Avraham Avinu and Sarah Imanu

King David/Yonatan

Devorah/Barak

Moses/Tzipporah

Ruth/Naomi

Solomon's Muse (female)/Solomon's Muse (male)

Yaakov/The Angel

Velma Dinkley/Coco Diablo

Rowan Roth/Neil Mcnair

Klaus Hargreeves/Dave Katz

Cecil Palmer/Carlos the Scientist

Josh Lyman/Donna Moss

Little Ash/Uriel

Lucille "Lucy" Kensington/Dr. Edison "Ed" Tucker

Fox Mulder/Dana Scully

Anshel/Avigdor

Anshel/Avigdor/Hadass

Anshel/Hadass

Maxine Myers/Paula Cohen

[roseapothecary]

i was tagged by @doublel27 to add the gifs of 4 characters that match my energy. lmao, okay, here we go:

David Rose (Schitt’s Creek)

Piper Halliwell (Charmed)

Rebecca Bunch (Crazy Ex-Girlfriend)

Julia Wicker (The Magicians)

tagging: @lilythesilly, @blackandwhiteandrose, @maxbegone, @typicaltk, @dangermagnetstrand, @diaaz, @lenny-bruce​, and anyone else who feels like it!

[einsteinsugly]

Michael Christopher Kelso (born August 30, 1959), as an '80s Man (an '80s Man Child)...

"My God, are we going to be like our parents?" -Andrew Clark, The Breakfast Club

*****

His New Family:

Brooke Kelso (nee Rockwell) (wife, October 1981-present)

Elizabeth "Betsy" Kelso (daughter, with Brooke; born January 15, 1979)

Hannah Kelso (daughter, with Brooke; born November 23, 1984)

Matthew "Matt" Kelso (nephew, through Casey)

William Rockwell and Carolyn Brooks (formerly Rockwell) (the in-laws)

Bruce Rockwell (his stupid brother-in-law)

Lauren Rockwell (niece, through marriage)

Adrian Forman, James Hyde, and Eric and Donna's new kid (godsons [*cough* two godsons and one goddaughter *cough*])

Rebecca "Becca" Hyde, Katherine "Kate" Forman, and Ashley Tate (basically his nieces)

Location(s):

Chicago, Illinois (September 1979-present)

Occupation(s):

Security guard at the Playboy mansion (for like, five seconds), police officer for the Chicago P.D. (January 1980-present)

Interests:

Hobbies: Sex and rock and roll, but way less drugs. There's a war on those! Lots of gaming, going to the arcade, playing with dogs, and listening to hair metal, and lots of watching cartoons and movies. Betsy and Hannah give him an excuse to watch all the cartoons and play on all the playgrounds he wants (especially those cool wooden castle ones). And he can even go to Six Flags with them, with a map and everything, now that the girls are old enough.

Yeah, he's a pretty good dad. Not some deadbeat, like Brooke and Carolyn expected him to be. And he wears that as a badge of honor, along with his police badge.

Movies: Caddyshack, Caddyshack, Caddyshack! And Ghostbusters, Back to the Future, Star Wars, Top Gun, Big, Three Men and a Baby, Land Before Time, the National Lampoon series, Indiana Jones, Friday the 13th, Die Hard, and anything with Arnold Schwarzenegger…

TV: Miami Vice and COPS (everyone else hates it, for some reason). A bunch of Saturday morning cartoons, and cartoons in general; plus, he watches Reading Rainbow and Punky Brewster with Betsy, all the time. A Pup Named Scooby-Doo will always be his favorite, though.

Games: Super Mario Bros (all of them), Donkey Kong, Space Invaders, Mike Tyson's Punch-Out, Pacman, Duck Hunt, Pole Position. And anything with the power glove, or with R.O.B.! He tries to get Eric into gaming, and he likes it too (Jackie and Hyde think it's for babies), but Eric likes those stupid text adventure games and strategy games. He wants something with a story or a real mission, whatever. Just have fun shooting bad guys and eating mushrooms, man!

Music: The stuff Hyde hates, for some reason. Like B 52's "Love Shack." Twisted Sister, Motley Crue, Def Leppard, Poison, Billy Idol. The stuff Hyde doesn't hate as much, like Van Halen, ZZ Top, AC/DC, KISS, David Bowie, and Guns 'N Roses. And fine, maybe he likes listening to New Kids on the Block with Betsy, okay? And Styx's "Mr. Roboto" is actually a badass song (don't tell Eric).

[softdavidrose]

10 fandoms, 10 characters, 10 tags

i was tagged by @sleepy-santiago, thank you!! 💕💕🥰🥰

not gonna tag anyone because i don’t know who’s done it, but feel free to do it if you see this and feel like it!!

schitt’s creek - david rose

community - abed nadir

brooklyn nine nine - jake peralta

parks and recreation - leslie knope

crazy ex girlfriend - rebecca bunch

the good place - tahani al jamil

glee - blaine anderson

superstore - jonah simms

julie and the phantoms - julie molina

the bold type - kat edison