#david lehman

[phantom-trollbooth]

The Difference Between Pepsi and Coke

Can't swim; uses credit cards and pills to combat intolerable feelings of inadequacy; Won't admit his dread of boredom, chief impulse behind numerous marital infidelities; Looks fat in jeans, mouths clichés with confidence, breaks mother's plates in fights; Buys when the market is too high, and panics during the inevitable descent; Still, Pop can always tell the subtle difference between Pepsi and Coke, Has defined the darkness of red at dawn, memorized the splash of poppies along Deserted railway tracks, and opposed the war in Vietnam months before the students, Years before the politicians and press; give him a minute with a road map And he will solve the mystery of bloodshot eyes; transport him to mountaintop And watch him calculate the heaviness and height of the local heavens; Needs no prompting to give money to his kids; speaks French fluently, and tourist German; Sings Schubert in the shower; plays pinball in Paris; knows the new maid steals, and forgives her.

David Lehman

[razorsadness]

12.

He could see it from the balcony: freedom; there it was, across the river, in the brown haze of dusk: a row of dead birches like the bars of a gate with blue water and green hills behind it. Tonight he would go. What was the signal?

—David Lehman, from “The Double Agent” (The Paris Review 139, summer 1996)

[johnesimpson]

The Practice of Counter-Inevitability

Lia Purpura, Jennifer Moxley, et al.: 'The Practice of Counter-Inevitability'

[Image: “Something Like (But Not the Same As) Inevitability,” by John E. Simpson. (Photo shared here under a Creative Commons License; for more information, see this page at RAMH.)] From whiskey river: Probability Most coincidents are not miraculous, but way more common than we think —it’s the shiver of noticing being central in a sequence of events that makes so much seem wild and rare — because what…

[dirt-cinema]

x files | 5x11 | kill switch

“Imagine being mingled so completely with another you no longer need your physical self. You’re one.”

[politicaldilfs]

New York Governor DILFs

Franklin Delano Roosevelt, Nelson Rockefeller, W. Averell Harriman, Charles Poletti, David Paterson, Mario Cuomo, George Pataki, Herbert H. Lehman, Eliot Spitzer, Malcolm Wilson, Hugh Carey

[milliondollarbaby87]

Sabrina (1954) Review

Sabrina Fairchild is the daughter of a rich families chauffeur and she has always been head over heels in love with David Larrabee. After a trip away she returns and it is actually his older brother Linus who begins to be a more suited match for her. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ Continue reading Untitled

[threeravenspublishing]

Three Ravens Coming Attractions! (And an Anthology Update)

Many of you been waiting patiently to hear back on your submissions for the Darkest Shadow, Brightest Light anthology. I want to first apologize for the delay and also reassure you that the process is grinding on, but slower than I would’ve liked. All due to personal reasons. It had been our original intent to be in a home we’d picked out back in March of this year, just prior to the birth of our…

[romancestual]

“vivisection (you’re going to break my heart)” by Marty McConnell from The Best American Poetry 2014, edited by Terrance Hayes and David Lehman.

[ahaura]

Bones and All (2022) dir. Luca Guadagnino

Hélène Cixous, The Love of the Wolf

Haruki Murakami, Norwegian Wood

Maud Ellmann, The Hunger Artists

Catherynne M. Valente, The Bread We Eat in Dreams, “The Red Girl”

Marty McConnell, The Best American Poetry (2014) ed. David Lehman & Terrance Hayes, “vivisection (you’re going to break my heart)”

Start Web Weaving Text & Image IDs:

[Image ID (1 out of 6): Maren is eating Lee; the shot is focused on Maren. The shot is in black and white. End ID]

Hélène Cixous, The Love of the Wolf

[Text ID: I beg you, eat me up. Want me down to the marrow. End ID]

[Image ID (2 out of 6): Maren is clutching her father's father's coat to her chest on her bed as she cries, shortly after he abandons her. End ID]

Haruki Murakami, Norwegian Wood

[Text ID: I was always hungry for love. Just once, I wanted to know what it was like to get my fill of it—to be fed so much love I couldn’t take any more. Just once. End ID]

[Image ID (3 out of 6): Maren and Lee sit across from each other in a diner; Maren is not looking at Lee and Lee is looking at her as he drinks coffee. End ID]

Maud Ellmann, The Hunger Artists

[Text ID: Since sexuality originates in seating, it is always haunted by the imagery of ingestion, having neither an object nor a territory proper to itself. Yet eating, in its turn, exceeds the biological demand for nourishment, for it expresses the desire to possess the object unconditionally. The infant sees his stomach as a safe in which he hoards his loot, thus learning his first lessons in private property. The genesis of secrecy may also be attributed to eating, for it is well known that the best way to keep a secret is to eat the evidence. {Highlighted} The stomach is a place almost as private as the grave. {End Highlight} End ID]

[Image ID (4 out of 6): In the dark of night outside of their blue pickup truck, Lee holds Maren's face in his hand. His face is bloody; he is shirtless. Maren's face is not visible to the camera. End ID]

Catherynne M. Valente, The Bread We Eat in Dreams, “The Red Girl”

[Text ID: I love you but there are things older and murkier than love. Things that live not in the heart but the entrails. I don’t want you to see me with the wolf. I don’t want you to see what he does to me. I don’t want you to see what I do to him. End ID]

[Image ID (5 out of 6): In daylight, Maren holds Lee; the viewer cannot see Lee's face. End ID]

Marty McConnell, The Best American Poetry (2014) ed. David Lehman & Terrance Hayes, “vivisection (you’re going to break my heart)”

[Text ID:When I say eat me I mean suck the bones clean, leave nothing

for the waiting, nothing for the vultures or the travelers to come. End ID]

[Image ID (6 out of 6): Maren is eating Lee; Maren's face is out of the shot but the viewer can see her hand on Lee's face as he screams. He is holding her hand to her face. The shot is in black and white. End ID]

End Web Weaving post Text & Image IDS.

[brokehorrorfan]

Alfred Hitchcock: The Iconic Film Collection will be released on November 26 via Universal. The 4K Ultra HD + Digital set collects six of the Master of Suspense's classic thrillers: Rear Window, To Catch a Thief, Vertigo, North By Northwest, Psycho, and The Birds.

Limited to 5,150, the six-disc collection is housed in premium book-style packaging featuring artwork by Tristan Eaton along with photos, bios, and trivia.

The uncut version of Psycho is included. Special features are detailed below.

1954's Rear Window is written by John Michael Hayes (To Catch a Thief), based on Cornell Woolrich’s 1942 short story "It Had to Be Murder." James Stewart, Grace Kelly, Wendell Corey, Thelma Ritter, and Raymond Burr star.

Rear Window special features:

Audio commentary by Hitchcock’s Rear Window: The Well-Made Film author John Fawell

Rear Window Ethics - 2000 documentary

Conversation with Screenwriter John Michael Hayes

Pure Cinema: Through the Eyes of The Master

Breaking Barriers: The Sound of Hitchcock

Masters of Cinema

Hitchcock/Truffaut - Audio recording from filmmaker François Truffaut’s in-depth interview with director Alfred Hitchcock about Rear Window

Production photo gallery

Theatrical trailer

Re-release trailer narrated by James Stewart

A wheelchair-bound photographer spies on his neighbors from his apartment window and becomes convinced one of them has committed murder.

1955's To Catch a Thief is written by John Michael Hayes (Rear Window), based on David Dodge’s 1952 novel of the same name. Cary Grant, Grace Kelly, Jessie Royce Landis, and John Williams star.

To Catch a Thief special features:

Audio commentary by Hitchcock historian Dr. Drew Casper

Filmmaker Focus: Leonard Maltin on To Catch a Thief

Behind the Gates: Cary Grant and Grace Kelly

A retired jewel thief sets out to prove his innocence after being suspected of returning to his former occupation.

1958's Vertigo is written by Alec Coppel (No Highway in the Sky) and Samuel A. Taylor (Sabrina), based on Boileau-Narcejac’s 1954 novel The Living and the Dead. James Stewart, Kim Novak, Barbara Bel Geddes, Tom Helmore, and Henry Jones star.

Vertigo special features:

Audio commentary by filmmaker William Friedkin (The Exorcist)

Obsessed with Vertigo: New Life for Hitchcock’s Masterpiece

Partners In Crime: Hitchcock’s Collaborators

Saul Bass: Title Champ

Edith Head: Dressing the Master’s Movies

Bernard Herrmann: Hitchcock’s Maestro

Alma: The Master’s Muse

Foreign censorship ending

100 Years of Universal: The Lew Wasserman Era

Hitchcock/Truffaut - Audio recording from filmmaker François Truffaut’s in-depth interview with director Alfred Hitchcock about Vertigo

Theatrical trailer

Restoration theatrical trailer

A former police detective juggles wrestling with his personal demons and becoming obsessed with a hauntingly beautiful woman.

1959's North by Northwest is written by Ernest Lehman (The Sound of Music, West Side Story). Cary Grant, Eva Marie Saint, James Mason, and Jessie Royce Landis star.

North by Northwest special features:

Audio commentary by writer Ernest Lehman

North by Northwest: Cinematography, Score, and the Art of the Edit

Destination Hitchcock: The Making of North by Northwest

The Master’s Touch: Hitchcock’s Signature Style

North by Northwest: One for the Ages

A Guided Tour with Alfred Hitchcock

A New York City advertising executive goes on the run after being mistaken for a government agent by a group of foreign spies, and falls for a woman whose loyalties he begins to doubt.

1960's Psycho is written by Joseph Stefano (The Outer Limits), based on Robert Bloch’s 1959 novel of the same name. Anthony Perkins, Vera Miles, John Gavin, Martin Balsam, John McIntire, and Janet Leigh star.

Psycho special features:

Original uncut and standard re-releases version of the film

The Making of Psycho

The Making of Psycho audio commentary with Alfred Hitchcock and The Making of Psycho author Stephen Rebello

Psycho Sound

In The Master’s Shadow: Hitchcock’s Legacy

Newsreel Footage: The Release of Psycho

The Shower Scene: With and Without Music

The Shower Sequence: Storyboards by Saul Bass

The Psycho Archives

Hitchcock/Truffaut - Audio recording from filmmaker François Truffaut’s in-depth interview with director Alfred Hitchcock about Psycho

Posters and ad gallery

Lobby card gallery

Behind-the-scenes photo gallery

Production photo gallery

Psycho theatrical trailers

Psycho re-release trailer

A secretary on the run for embezzlement takes refuge at a secluded motel owned by a repressed man and his overbearing mother.

1963's The Birds is written by Evan Hunter (High and Low), based on Daphne du Maurier’s 1952 short story of the same name. Tippi Hedren, Rod Taylor, Jessica Tandy, Suzanne Pleshette, and Veronica Cartwright star.

The Birds special features:

The Birds: Hitchcock’s Monster Movie

All About The Birds

Original ending

Deleted scene

Tippi Hedren’s screen test

The Birds is coming (Universal International Newsreel)

Suspense Story: National Press Club hears Hitchcock (Universal International Newsreel)

100 Years of Universal: Restoring the Classics

100 Years of Universal: The Lot

Hitchcock/Truffaut - Audio recording from filmmaker François Truffaut’s in-depth interview with director Alfred Hitchcock about Vertigo

Theatrical trailer

A wealthy San Francisco socialite pursues a potential boyfriend to a small Northern California town that slowly takes a turn for the bizarre when birds of all kinds suddenly begin to attack people.

Pre-order Alfred Hitchcock: The Iconic Film Collection.

[5eraphim]

You mentioned in the past that you thought yandere medic would be okay with sharing y/n with another person. How do you think that would go? maybe with heavy, since they’re so close? (If you aren’t doing request rn feel free to ignore this <3 have a good day )

anon,, my sweet beloved and treasured above all loving sentiment, if only you knew how long I've awaited this very ask....

I teased this idea way back (here, the first part obvi.). I've gone back and forth about going for it and writing out the prompt in full, as I think it would be very, very... enticing, and another one of those things I would love to read which must unfortunately start with a blank word doc. I wound up writing this to be rather light-hearted, but if anyone wants to see this scenario played out a bit darker, I'm open to the request!

But additionally, I know myself well enough as a person, and didn't really want to go through all that effort unless if was for a request, or unless I knew it would be for me and at least one other reader, because it feels only natural a multiple character x reader one shot should be long enough to give each character a decent enough feature, thus will (safe to say) always be much longer, and take much longer to write, than a regular x character oneshot. (If that makes any sense?) Anyhow, that's all to say, thank you, thank you, thank you ever so kindly for the ask, I really hope you enjoy how this came out, it was a pleasure to write. <3

Characters: The Heavy 🐻 and The Medic 🕊️ (Team Fortress 2)

Summary: Drunkenness and tenderness between comrades lowers inhibitions, let's hope your ambitions will rise to compensate.

Rating: X (MINORS DNI, YOU KNOW THIS ISN'T FOR YOU)

Content Warnings: AFAB reader, smut, three way, oral (female receiving), first time, size difference, slight intoxication, dubcon (nothing too intense, but for the sake of intoxication/slight coercion), heavymedic sandwich.

Word Count: 4.5k

MASTER POST

TIP JAR

(Song Inspo: Delicate Weapon- Grimes)

"when I say eat me, I mean suck the bones clean, leave nothing for the waiting, leave nothing for the vultures, or the travelers to come." “vivisection (you’re going to break my heart)” by Marty McConnell from The Best American Poetry 2014, edited by Terrance Hayes and David Lehman.

While the mission wasn't technically over yet, the work for the day was, and thank God for that. The job was simple enough, nothing more than a little errand run, fetching some supplies to bring back to home base, not necessarily requiring the combined efforts of you, Heavy and Medic. Still, when you were requested to accompany the two, you immediately agreed. So while the work bored you, the company would make it all worth it. 

While the mission wasn't technically over yet, the work for the day was, and thank God for that. The job was simple enough, nothing more than a little errand run, fetching some supplies to bring back to home base, not necessarily requiring the combined efforts of you, Heavy and Medic. Still, when you were requested to accompany the two, you immediately agreed. The work bored you, but the company made it all worth it. 

The road down was straightforward enough, and collecting the supplies was just as effortless, but the trip back was less so. A sudden and severe thunderstorm forced the lot of you to find a room for the night to accommodate all three of you and your cargo. Along with a few beers picked up along the way, a little treat to celebrate a hard day's work. While typically, you knew drinking on the job wasn't professional, this was a special occasion, and you knew it would be back to work once you returned home, so you might as well enjoy it while it lasted. Finding a suitable room big enough for all of you on such short notice was a miracle, but this place suited you well.

Two double-wide beds, a radio, an armchair, a couch, and a little kitchenette with an ice box to keep the beer nice and cold while you took turns changing in the bathroom out of work clothes and washing up a little. You took the initiative to contact Homebase regarding the delay. 

A part of you was so tired you wanted to crawl into bed right away, but you weren't about to deny yourself a nice cold beer with friends. To your surprise, Medic sat in the armchair beside the couch while Heavy sat on the sofa, leaving the only open space to unwind next to Heavy, which you reclined comfortably into. Considering how they were practically glued to the hip most of the time, you didn't understand why they didn't sit together now. Also, you didn't like how Medic's eyes seemed to follow you across the room as you sat down next to Heavy, doing your best to keep a respectable distance between you and Heavy. 

For some time, you relaxed, talking, listening to the radio, one beer turning into two, and two into two and a half as you settled more comfortably into the couch, no longer holding yourself so austerely, relaxing a little. Your head eventually resting on Heavy's shoulder, he looked at you, "Comfortable?"

You nodded, his body mass was so burly, and you could feel the warmth of his body through his shirt, making you feel a little giddy. "You're too cozy- I wanna sleep right here."

"Still cold from storm? I warm you."

It wasn't a question. And without waiting for a yes, Heavy effortlessly pulled you onto his lap, sitting you sideways on top of his legs. With one arm slung over your shoulder and one under your knees, he pulled you into his lap, the overwhelming closeness feeling sudden, but he was still so temptingly warm and comfortable you didn't want to pull away.

"Feel better?"

You giggled, nodding your head as he ruffled your hair playfully, keeping one arm around your shoulders as you settled against the arm of the couch. Your eyes were closed, your head feeling all floaty as you felt his hand move from the top of your head to the side of your cheek. His hands, no longer concealed under his gloves, felt calloused but so gentle against your cheek. He moved subtly, decisively. You didn't even realize he moved your face to meet his until you felt his lips connecting against your own.

Without warning, you pulled away sharply with the awkward rigidity of a stranger. Your actions caught Heavy by surprise, allowing you to detach yourself without restriction, though you could see his confusion through wide, frightened eyes. In a moment, you were made shockingly aware of everything the alcohol so effectively blinded you to before now. It was that awkward, sinking feeling of becoming all too aware of your own body all at once, aware of the space you were taking up, of how much of your body was pressed up against the massive Russian you shared the couch with, the clammy sweat coating your palms, the tension in your joints, yet most of all the butterflies in your belly which intensified into something less than pleasant. All of this awkwardness made you feel suddenly insecure about yourself, your form, and your relation to the men around you; how could you have been so blind to this before? For goodness sake, these were your coworkers; it was your responsibility to keep things professional between the lot of you, a task you could not more thoroughly have failed at. It was humiliating to realize you folded after just a couple of drinks, even if Heavy was playing along; it all felt so wrong and too pushy. Not to mention the fact Heavy was a taken man. The truth made all the more grievous, considering his partner was sitting right there facing the two of you. While the guilt for what you'd just done made you want to hide your face in shame, it was impossible to keep from looking at Medic. However, to your surprise, he merely sat there watching the two of you, cocking his head to the side slightly, with a confusion matching Heavy's as though you were the one acting strangely here.

"Something is wrong?" Heavy inquired, his hand on your waist tightening slightly, likely in reassurance, unfortunately having the opposite effect. It felt too awkward to look Heavy in the eye or face him at this point. So instead, you kept your gaze locked on the floor before the two of you as you nervously tried to squirm your way off the larger man's lap. All to no avail, however, as Heavy's grip on you was cast iron, and you resorted to clasping your hands together on your lap, speaking as levelly as you could, using all your willpower to keep the emotions and alcohol from causing your weak voice to crack, "I'm sorry, Heavy. I think I've, um-overstepped here; I shouldn't have, y-you know… Well, I mean, I think I'll turn in now- it's so late, already…."

Your voice trailed off, and you hated how wishy-washy you sounded, betraying your will to stay strong, to appear rational and firm as any reliable comrade should.

Heavy was not convinced. "You were fine when I pulled you on my lap. Why so tired so fast?"

Forcing a nervous laugh and uncomfortable forced smile, you tried to turn to Medic for reassurance, but he stared back, eyes squinting slightly, matching Heavy's suspicion. "Must be the alcohol's catching up with me then-'' It wasn't a total lie, as you could've sworn you could feel the alcohol churning in your gut, almost taunting you, forcing you to remember just how much you'd drunk in such a short amount of time.

"Explain." Heavy looked at you and deadpanned, waiting for you to tell the truth. You tried to swallow, but your mouth felt dry. 

"I mean, aren't you two-" The awkwardness melded uncomfortably with the guilt; how were you supposed to explain yourself in a situation like this? "I mean- but you two are together, aren't you?" 

"And?" Heavy spoke bluntly, putting you right back on the spot. You sighed nervously, nibbling at your lower lip and turning your head to face Medic. 

"I just, I-I know it's not my business, but I mean- I can't imagine you're alright with any of this-'' You thought you knew your friends well, but you never would've imagined winding up in a situation like this with the two of them. To your surprise, a smile spread across Medic's face.

"Of course I am! This was my idea, after all!" You merely blinked at him, not at all following what he meant by that.

"Huh? What do you mean, it was your idea?" 

"Well…" You could see his eyes flick from you to Heavy, silently asking for some backup. Heavy's fingers began to rub comforting little circles over your waist, his other hand covering your own hands on your lap in a reassuring gesture. 

"You're pretty and kind but sp shy. We thought a little experience would help." His blunt words took you completely by surprise.

"Experience?" You managed. Heavy nodded, not at all registering the shock on your face. 

"What he means is-" Medic chuckled slightly, interjecting, amused watching how flustered Heavy's words made you. "We thought if we helped you with a little, let's say, physical bonding-"

You opened your mouth, ready to ask what exactly he meant by this, but he pressed on.

"Nothing too intense now- just a little intimacy to get you more accustomed."

You hated how vague he was being, but also, you'd be lying if you said you'd never thought of being in a situation like this before. Only in your wildest, most unrealistic dreams, or so you thought. The two men were handsome in their own ways, you'd known before you got to know them, but you never liked to dwell on such lewd thoughts. You always felt so guilty afterward; they were your friends after all, even if just in your thoughts, you knew it was wrong to think so lustfully of friends. 

Sure, there was always a little lighthearted play-flirting occasionally, but you would never have tried anything serious with either of them. Your friendship meant too much to risk losing like that. 

You felt Heavy kiss the side of your head, murmuring in a low, uncharacteristically quiet voice into your ear, "You're shy but not sneaky. I see how you look at Doctor behind his back. He says you stare at me also. Is this true?"

Your breath hitched when he began to trail his beautiful, massive hand from over your hands, snaking it up your belly until it cupped the side of your face, forcing you to focus on him and meet his eye. Heavy drank in every detail of your face before settling his eyes on your lips, waiting for you to answer, and with a trembling exhale, you spoke, "It is." Before he could wait no longer, closing the space between your mouths once again, his lips curling into a smirk just seconds before his parted lips connected with yours.

While you were still awestruck at the surrealness of the situation, you felt your reservations evaporating by the second. Finally kissing back, you allowed Heavy to deepen the kiss as he used his hand to push your head closer against his. His thumb brushed over your cheek, feeling the warmth of your skin as you felt almost uncomfortably overheated. He moved slowly but so lovingly, using his tongue to dip into your mouth and taste you, sucking against your lips as you broke the kiss with hesitation, asking,

"Are you sure you want to go through with all this?" He nodded with a mellow smile as you continued, still feeling traces of nervousness clinging to you stubbornly. "I'd never forgive myself if I ruined our friendship, and I, uh-" Despite your awkwardness and hesitation, Heavy smiled at you so resolutely, so affectionately. Watching you as though you were the most beautiful person he'd ever beheld.

"I don't want to let you down here. You guys were right; I've got no real experience here… I don't know if I'll be any good at this." It was almost shameful to say out loud, but Heavy didn't even blink, playfully kissing your cheek.

"Don't think of that. It's your time to learn, not lead." 

He nuzzled his nose against your cheek, the feeling almost ticklish, making you stifle a giggle. "Just lay back and look pretty. You'll do perfect." He pulled away a little, his hand on your waist, tugging at your shirt a little; only then did you see how blown out his pupils were, "Will you come to bed now?"

It was time to be decisive. The abruptness of the question caught you off-guard, but you had no idea if you would ever get a chance like this again. This was your moment; it was time to act or wish you had. You swallowed your uncertainty and nodded, finally removing your hands from your lap to help Heavy pull off your shirt before reaching out to touch his own top and about to do the same. But he gave you a look that made you pause.

"This one off too? It's not too much? We only go as far as you want." As praising as he was moments ago, his firmness and evident respect for your boundaries made you feel all the more loved. You took this as your chance to try and charm him, as he did so effortlessly to you.

"The shirt off is better; I mean, I've always wanted to get a look under these clothes." The sound of Medic chuckling beside you made you realize you'd almost forgotten he was there in the first place. It felt odd knowing he was so close, though if this was all his idea all along, you wondered where he factored into all this. Pushing that thought aside, you helped Heavy remove his shirt as you curled a little closer, your head resting against his chest, your hand on his shoulder as you softly kissed his skin, nuzzling to feel the delightful feeling of skin-to-skin contact as much as you could. "Heavy, your body is so warm. You feel amazing." Your words were mumbled, quiet, and practically smothered as you spoke without moving your head much from his chest. You could feel his chest rumbling with a low laugh, and when you felt his hips gently press a little closer against your body, but you didn't shy away. You could feel he was aroused and didn't doubt he knew you were too. You felt the warmth between your legs intensifying the longer you felt Heavy's bare skin against yours, your thighs squeezing tighter and tighter, and you swore you could feel a bit of wetness from the kiss alone.

"Will you take me to bed now? Please?" The neediness gave you a bit of confidence as you looked up at Heavy, who needed no further incentive. You leaned against him for support as you both rose, your hand finding his as you two walked to the bed, laying down. At the same time, Heavy lingered for a moment overhead, distracted by the curves of your body now spread out like a banquet before him, eyes looking everywhere but your face. Then, for a second, you felt a twinge of insecurity, "I won't lie; I'm still a little scared this is gonna hurt." 

Instantly, this snapped Heavy's attention back to your face as he sat beside you on the side of the bed, his hand finding yours again as he spoke, "We only go as far as you want… We can stop now if-" You didn't talk, just shook your head no, moving Heavy's hand with your own to the waist of your pants. He looked at you one last time for assurance. However, you could practically feel his hand trembling in yours with anticipation before you guided him to unbutton your pants, helping pull them off you. At the same time, you slinked out of them and your underwear, kicking them to the floor. 

Even against your thigh, his hand loomed intimidatingly, the size difference so beautiful, making you shudder, wanting this man more than ever. You were so distracted by his hands you didn't even hear Medic sneaking up behind Heavy until you heard him speak. "How precious you two look~" You jolted a little in surprise, seeing Medic peering down at you from behind Heavy with narrowed eyes glazed over with lust, shamelessly checking out your nude figure, now stripped perfectly naked in front of him.

"You didn't forget about me so soon, did you?" He asked in a faux-hurt voice, "You're doing so well. Are you ready to go a little further now?" 

"I am." You spoke without hesitation, the burning between your legs intensifying almost painfully as you shyly parted your thighs, feeling cool air ticking your sweaty skin as Medic walked to the foot of the bed to get a better view before you sat up a little, pushing away from the headboard as Heavy got into bed behind you.

"Heavy is here, right behind. You will be safe."

Before now, you remembered how painfully tense you felt, but at this moment, you were put at ease, comforted at last by the presence behind you, no longer so overwhelmed. How foolish you were to think your relationship with the two men had to be strictly business, how blind you were to the pleasure the two men had to offer.

"We will stop at any time-"

You cut him off with a kiss as he settled at the head of the bed, "I know I'm no good at showing it, but. I want this. I've wanted this for so long. You two mean so much to me, and I trust you."

You were about to say, 'I love you,' but you held back. You didn't have the guts to say something so bold. But you hoped Heavy, as well as Medic, understood, despite your shy quietness. There was a minute or two of moving around, Heavy moving from his spot at your bedside to get behind you; he spread his thick legs to give you space to settle between. Finally, you were lying down, your upper back and head resting on his belly, noticing the bulge in his pants as it pressed not-so-subtly into your back. Despite the lewdness of it all, you let your head fall back a little; Heavy's body felt so solid and warm behind you, it almost made you want to skip everything and just cuddle up and fall asleep already, but you knew Medic wouldn't allow such a thing.

"I'll start nice and slow, just for you." Medic's words were deceptively sweet, almost enough to hide his lustful intent. Your throat felt too dry to speak, so you merely nodded, feeling the heat in the pit of your stomach intensify at this new position. He was condescending to you, and yet you didn't even have the inner strength left to respond. Medic moved over you, his hands resting on Heavy's thighs around your head to keep you nice and caged, right where he wanted you. He could see it written all across your face; you were getting turned on being obedient like this, submitting and letting them take the lead. He leaned his body down further, enough for you to feel the rub of his pants over your naked flesh, the odd sensation making you wince as he slotted his knee between your legs, the gentle contact alone enough to make you jolt a little, startled. 

"Aww, I'm sorry. Did I scare you? You must be pretty needy down there, aren't you? Did Heavy do a good job getting you warmed up?" Medic could feel your chest rising and falling rapidly as you breathe deeper. He continued, "You've masturbated before, haven't you?" The question caught you off guard. You looked at Medic with wide eyes, feeling another throb of arousal, seeing his predatory grin, one you'd seen countless times in battle but appearing like never before, given the current position. He pressed his knee a little harder against you. 

"Y-yeah, I've- a lot, I guess…." 

"Did you ever think of it like this? Your pussy leaking all over me while you grind against me as hard as you can?" You keened, your hips rolling against his clothed thigh, the muscle bulging distractingly beneath the thin covering. It was humiliating to have him mocking you while you were powerless to defend yourself, yet still, you wanted even more. He laughed, amused by your lack of a response, as though your brain was already succumbing so quickly to your own lust you forgot how to form whole sentences.

"Does it turn you on when I dirty-talk you like this? I bet behind that pretty face, you're even more perverted than either of us." You grit your teeth, biting back a moan.

"Medic, w-why are you keeping your pants on?" He paused momentarily at the abrupt question, looking at you with an eyebrow raised as you rushed to explain yourself. "I mean, doesn't it feel- like, weird?"

"You want to see me undressed that bad, huh?" Medic responded. Of course, he wasn't wrong, but the self-satisfied look on his face stopped you from admitting he was right. 

You shook your head, "W-well, I mean, aren't you uncomfortable under all that?" He grinned, seeing right through your bluff. But, even though he knew you were lying, Medic wasn't about to press you too hard on the matter. 

"You'll understand once you get more experience. But, you know, it can be just as rewarding to stay dressed, to keep control-" He paused to trail a finger from between your breasts down, just below your navel, the light sensation causing you to throb with want against his thigh. Continuing in a low, almost antagonistic tone, "While your partner is a wet, needy, naked little mess beneath you." He could not more clearly be mocking you, but something about it had quite the effect on you. Medic knew just how to push your buttons, and it was driving you crazy.

He was about to say something when Heavy's voice from behind interrupted. 

"Medic, be nice. This is first time. You're embarrassing her. Don't overdo it." Thank God there was a literal angel over your shoulder to watch over you and reign in his partner.

"Perhaps, but it looks like someone's enjoying it." He was about to move his hand lower when you interrupted,

"Medic?"

He stopped his hand immediately, eyes meeting yours as you continued, "Can I get a kiss first?" You felt awkward, making such a bashful request compared to how confidently he spoke. His face softened at this, nodding before leaning closer, your hands cupping his cheeks. It felt good to be the first to deepen the kiss, your tongue flicking over his lip as his mouth parted, allowing you to get a better taste. Then, without breaking the kiss, his hand began to move down again, his thumb finding your clit quickly, causing you to moan into the kiss. 

Your mind went blank with pleasure at the stimulation, his thumb rolling softly over your clit as his other fingers deftly traced the exterior of your sex, collecting the abundant moisture and spreading it over the entrance while you throbbed beneath his fingertips. You felt an almost painful burning feeling as his fingers moved faster, lips working in rhythm against your mouth; far better than any fantasy you'd felt before.

Medic broke the kiss, "Do you want me to use my mouth? Are you ready for that?"

Without waiting, you nodded, "Please! It feels so good- please, please don't stop!"

"Just wait another moment- need to make sure you're ready," Medic spoke in a sweet, gentle voice, so sickeningly sweet you could practically feel your heartthrob. He pushed two fingers inside, and you couldn't help but buck forwards at the contact. Making Medic hum in satisfaction at your reaction. You could vaguely hear him chiding you for your impatience, but you were beyond caring at this point, and when you felt him tracing painfully slow little circles around your entrance, you whined out loud in annoyance.

"Will you stop teasing already and get on with it- Fuck!"

Medic looked genuinely shocked momentarily at how bold you were, but it didn't deter him. Instead, without waiting for another moment, he dove his face between your legs as you unconsciously spread your legs further for him, leaning back against Heavy for support, arching your back, feeling his hands on your shoulders to keep you steady; it wasn't long until you felt Medic's hands just above your knees, his breath fanning against your pussy.

But far be it from Medic to let you off so quickly, and you groaned out loud as you felt his tongue moving, intentionally moving up and around your clit, but refusing to make contact. You were dangerously close to digging your fingernails directly into Heavy's thighs. But you forced yourself to move one hand to the top of Medic's head, your fingers clutching his hair, trying to guide him into place while you ground against his face. When you finally felt his lips connecting with your clit you were practically sobbing with bliss, the feeling intensifying as he began to suckle against the swollen bundle of nerves. 

"More, more- Oh God, please- More!" You were getting louder than you intended, but fortunately, the radio likely kept anyone from overhearing any of this, but you only got louder as he began to suck harder. His tongue lapped upwards, swirling against your clit, as he moaned into you, swallowing as much as he could. You felt feral. Like you were burning hot on the inside, but Medic kept tempo without issue. Finally, you could feel your climax coming on, rolling your hips even harder, unintentionally pulling his hair just as fiercely. Still, if he was bothered by this, he didn't say anything, slurping contently as you finally felt the end coming on. And you trembled, feeling your body awash in ecstasy as you succumbed to the blinding pleasure between your legs.

It was an embarrassingly long time until you managed to catch your breath, the gap in experience between you and them becoming painfully obvious once again. Your throat felt so dry and scratchy from your heavy breathing and moaning, much like a scorched throat from pushing yourself in physical training. Though other than that, you were in a situation unlike any you'd known before. Naked, slick with your own sweat, your mind still tipsy and unstable from your orgasm. 

You could feel Heavy's hand petting at your hair from behind, and you couldn't help but swoon, feeling so supported and intimate with him after such a perverse moment. "You look so pretty when you come." There was an edge in his voice, and you thought he was indirectly asking if you wanted to go again, but you were too tired, too used up to think about doing this all over again. You didn't know how to respond; thankfully, Medic spoke first.

"It would be a shame if we kept this a 'one-time-thing,' wouldn't you agree?" And you felt your headrush, this evening felt too good to be true, nothing less than a dream come to life, but the promise of more was all the better. Nodding, you focused your gaze on Medic as he moved from between your legs; you responded, "So long as it's ok with you, I'd never want to come between things-"

 You felt like a rag doll, limp and being pulled lifelessly by the other two, Medic facing you, arms around your back, pulling you into his chest. "Don't worry about it; you're the one with much more to learn here." You felt Heavy's enormous arm pull the both of you tighter into his chest. And at this moment, sandwiched between the warm bodies of two men you cared more about than anyone else in the world, you prayed the night would never end. 

[filmnoirfoundation]

Ready some free Christmas noir fun?

LOA Live presents I’m Dreaming of a Noir Christmas: Classic Crime Thrillers of the 1960s

With Geoffrey O’Brien, Sarah Weinman, Gene Seymour, and David Lehman Tuesday, December 5th

6:00 to 7:00 pm Eastern

To cap LOA LIVE’s fall season, a killer lineup of panelists explores classic crime thrillers of the 1960s, from Donald Westlake-writing-as-Richard Stark’s taut smash-and-grab heist novel The Score to Patricia Highsmith’s eerie potboiler The Tremor of Forgery.  

Join Geoffrey O’Brien, editor of Crime Novels of the 1960s, along with noir maven Sarah Weinman (The Real Lolita), cultural critic Gene Seymour, and poet David Lehman (The Mysterious Romance of Murder) for an arresting dive into nine astonishingly inventive novels that pulse with the energies of a turbulent, transformative decade. 

REGISTER

[thatwritererinoriordan]

[lesbiancolumbo]

the fact that i got to see this before the general public remains a huge honor so. end of first chapter of i've got a match. hello. HELLO

i've got a match has a very special place in my heart bc it was the first sidjay fic i wrote after a real devoted community popped up -- and it was a real word of mouth kind of thing lmao! which is why you got to read it like 2 years early because i wasn't on ao3 yet and hinting at it like crazy and you just DM'd me and asked for it! (which, for anyone reading, is like a surefire way to get me to do anything lol)

one of my favorite moments from the lehman canon is when sidney and jj play gin in hunsecker fights the world, so anytime i can incorporate them playing cards, i'm gonna do it. i also took inspiration for sidney's being in a wheelchair from the holy gospel ("the coded queer lives of a hollywood classic" by david thomson):

The odious cop, Kello, has beaten up Sidney on the street and carried his limp body away. Is he dead? Or would it be possible for J.J. to come down to the street to reclaim the broken body, carry it upstairs, and put it in the room left free by Susie’s departure? That is not an enviable future for a very odd couple. Maybe Sidney lives in a wheelchair, crippled and needing to be looked after. Just so long as he can exchange barbed lines with J.J.

so that was what bounced around in my mind as i wrote this. this scene at the end of the chapter is the culmination of most of my favorite dynamics re sidney/jj: that they don't talk about their true feelings at all, that everything between them is an extremely elaborate game that results in a Winner and a Loser, and that no matter what anyone else on this website thinks or says, j.j. loves sidney more.

i don't plot fic out in advance -- i write them as i go, because i'm insane -- but i knew as soon as i put sidney in that wheelchair that he was gonna purposefully try to stumble out of it to see if j.j. would let his ass tumble to the floor. i also knew that at some point sidney's memories were going to start filtering back to him, and decided that after an extremely (for them anyway) tender round of sex that that would be the perfect place for it, because with those two i like blending moments of tenderness and moments of violence all in one.

also this was the first time i ever wrote from j.j.'s perspective which i remember as being extremely difficult because he was (then) a tough nut to crack. but very rewarding, and some of my best work remains in this chapter. :)

[chocolatehideoutpirate]

I gotta look up to the sky and tell the lord I'm leaning on you and I just make edits for each child each person in family and friends that passed away and went to heaven to be angels watching over the world Jesus I'm leaning on you rest in peace to those in this second edit Gracie Perry Watson, Inez Clarke Briggs, Annie Kerr Aiken, Annie Oakley, Alice Liddell, Larisa Ratmanski, Mania Halef, Anne Frank, Eva Munzer, Nellie Gray Bundy Johnson, Colleen Marie Applegate, Connie Lynn Taylor, Emilie Marian Bromundt, Robert Ferdinand Bromundt, Julia Allison Wise, Kimberly Michelle Adaway, Jason Alexander Black, Shirley June Tolle, Emmett Till, Violet Geneva Setty Tolle, Nora Mae Setty Boldman, John Setty, Maude Abanade Cadwallader Setty, Yvonne Mary Cayeaux Devitt, Karen Ann Culp, Phyllis Rebecca Crowe, Stacie Lee Swofford,Devan Brooke Duniver, Mary Louise Lehman Carman, Grace Leona Lehman Krout, Clara Alverta Myers Lehman, Adam Henry Lehman,Anna Catherine Roby, Russell Thomas Roby, Ricardo David Arterberry, Linda Therese Jones Arterberry, Traytease Lanette Arterberry, Clarence Edward Moore Jr., Meagan Lindsey Bradley, Peachlyn Bradley, Finey Ynfante Mechell, Lucas Ynfante, Jane Mora Ynfante, Francis Ynfante, Katy Ynfante Martines, John K Ynfante, Rozell Lucas “RL” Ynfante, Yolanda Rosamond Lombardo, Serena Daniel Aiken Simons, Martin Laurence Amos, Polly Bixby, Rosalia Lombardo and more Angels