#dating is rough so I’m trying not to get my hopes up cuz shit can change so quick

[dyke-dyke-goose]

just had the experience of a pretty femme touching my leg while I was speaking

my brain was like

[2goth2moth]

Hey, can I request a blind date with a monster but they end up going home 👀 things get steamy

But then the monster's like "oh no, umm I gtg cuz I'm not human and they'll definitely find out now" kinda vibes?

(so it's basically human reader x shapeshifter in a universe where monsters are hidden)

You can come up with your own reasons for whatever ✌️ (any gender is fine) (I like were/minotaur monsters but you can pick any that you see fit)

Oof, ouch, this got a little more angsty than I wanted it to. I'm sorry! And I'm sorry it took so long. I hope you still enjoy ;-;

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pleasant Surprises (M!Werebear x GN!Reader, NSFW)

Fun fact about me: Picking the xenomorph from Alien in a game of Fuck-Marry-Kill with @xo-philia when we were younger was my monsterfucker awakening! So I couldn't resist putting that in when I had to think of a movie.

Word count: 3430

Includes: Mild angst, mild hurt/comfort, size kink, fur, frottage, minor scent kink, blowjobs with copious amounts of cum, very minor (blink and you'll miss it) pain kink, less-than-ideal communication in sexual situations

Going on blind dates is a little like rolling dice. They always started in the same place, everyone had their little superstitions and rituals to try to make them come out right, but more often than not they ended with uncomfy kisses, awkward goodbyes, and an unspoken hope that you never had to see each other again (okay, the metaphor isn’t perfect, but the foundation holds true). Sometimes, however, blind dates turned out great, a perfect six (or whatever it is you needed to roll), and you ended up really liking the person.

Sometimes blind dates ended with you making out with a massive cutie on your couch after dinner.

The two of you had been introduced by a mutual friend, and had hit it off the minute you met. Characteristically uncomfortable small talk over mid-afternoon coffee smoothly turned into raucous laughter and flirtatious touching between bites of cheap greasy pizza on the hood of his car. You had no idea how the very attractive mountain of a man- Arthur, he’d said in a voice that seemed far too sweet for his intimidating figure- would react when you’d purred a suggestive (but not explicit) invitation to him, but his ears flushed and he stammered out a “yes” before taking your hand and following you inside. You wasted no time leading Arthur to your couch and sitting down next to him.

“So,” you said, “what kind of movie do you want to watch?”

“I like horror.” His voice was a rumbly baritone that distinctly reminded you of brown sugar. “And anything science-y.”

You wracked your brain for any good scary science movies that you had already watched and wouldn’t get distracted while watching again.

“How does Alien sound?”

It was a safe option, as far as you were concerned. It was a good film, a classic in both scary and science-y departments, and you’d seen it enough times that staying focused on the task of “seduce the hot guy on your couch” wouldn’t be too hard.

“I’ve seen it before…” Shit, maybe he wanted to watch something new. “But I always like rewatching it.”

You cheered internally, but kept a calm exterior as you went through the motions of setting up your TV. As soon as you did, you stood up to turn off the lights. “Anything I can get for you?” You asked, running a very flirtatious hand over his shoulders as you passed behind him.

A tiny shiver went through him at your touch, and you relished in it. “N-no, I’m good for now. Thank you, though.”

Your heart squeezed a little at his very pink ears and the blush staining the back of his neck.

God, he’s so cute.

It was impossible to deny yourself a longer-than-entirely-appropriate moment to take in the very pretty flush before flicking the lights off. With the room now dark, you made your way back to the couch. You sit down as close to Arthur as you dared. Warmth soaked through the inches between your bodies, and you had to physically resist the urge to move closer to him. Trying not to jump him right then and there was taking up so much of your brain-power that you didn’t notice his hand creeping towards you until a warm pinky brushed up against your thigh. You stifled a jump and turned to see his handsome, bearded face staring at you, bathed in the light from the TV.

“Is this okay?” He asked, just barely moving his fingers against your clothed leg.

You excitedly shifted in your seat so that you were facing him, kneecaps touching. “Are you kidding me? I’ve been actively holding back from kissing you for hours!”

“Oh.” His eyes went wide. “You can, if you want. I, um. I’d like you to.”

That was all the invitation you needed to dart forward and press your lips to his. It was quick and chaste, and you pulled back almost immediately. Arthur was frozen, awestruck, for several seconds before he shook himself slightly. He moved towards you cautiously, eyes darting nervously around your face, before cupping your jaw in his free hand and kissing you. His lips started moving against yours almost as soon as they touched, the motion a sweet push and pull between you, his beard just scratching against your face. The warm pinky against your leg became a large hand that rested on top of it, squeezing in time with the kiss. You hummed, pleased, and teased the seam of his lips with the tip of your tongue. Arthur’s hand tightened on your thigh and he opened his mouth to you. The kiss turned sloppy, tongues slipping together with slick, filthy sounds.

Arthur’s hand traced a firm path from your thigh to your hip, where it held tighter and stayed for several heated seconds. You pulled away from the kiss, your lips separating with a wet smack. He chased after you with a little whine, dropping his forehead onto your shoulder and lowering his other hand from your jaw to your hip. With another little noise deep the back of his throat, he began nosing against your neck and along your collar. You had to stifle a giggle at the feeling of his facial hair tickling your skin.

Stilling him with a hand to the back of his head, you carefully threaded your fingers through his hair and pulled him back. His eyes stuttered shut and he let out a barely-audible groan, hands twitching on your hips. You grinned and tightened your grip experimentally, very pleased with the strangled moan that he let out.

“You’re so hot,” you cooed to him

“You are too,” he panted, eyelashes fluttering with each pull of your fingers, which hadn’t let up yet.

The sight was too much for you. With a murmured “come here” you pulled him back to you, kissing him fiercely. It was rough, messy, all clacking teeth and noses bumping into each other. The sounds of your mouths moving together was obscene, and you could feel saliva slipping out where your lips met. You kept your hold on his hair, pulling his head this way and back to control the kiss, little spark of arousal went through you with each breathless moan that fell from Arthur’s mouth to yours. His hands kept gripping into your hips, growing tighter with each second that passed.

“Do you want me in your lap?” You asked, backing off just long enough to get the question out.

Arthur didn’t even bother doing that, nodding without breaking the kiss. Before you could even start to move, his hands slipped under your ass and he bodily moved you until you were straddling him. He was so warm beneath you, and you couldn’t help but grind down against him. The feeling of his cock, hot and impossibly hard beneath you, was intoxicating, and you rocked against him, groaning into his mouth with each motion. You could feel his bulge swell even more where it lay against the inside of your thigh. Somewhere in the back of your mind you distantly thought that getting him any harder should have been impossible, but you were too caught up in the feeling of wet, messy kisses being pressed to your jaw and neck to care. His body was moving under you, slight little shifts that you could feel echoing everywhere that he was pressed flush against you. The collar of your shirt was pulled down and away from your shoulder, the tip of his nail dragging against your skin, and he bit down on the newly-exposed skin, biting and sucking until you were whimpering in his lap, grinding down over and over again until you could feel your climax approach all too fast. Both of his hands had returned to their places on your waist, and they bit in as he pulled you to him, his own hips bucking up to meet yours every time. He had stopped his assault on your neck, no doubt leaving a dark, tender bruise behind, and his mouth lay slack and open against you, desperate moans and hot saliva spilling out. All of a sudden, ten pin pricks of sharp, impossible pain bloomed where his hands lay, and you came with a wail, hips stuttering to a stop against his.

Your eyes were closed tightly, chest heaving as you slumped over onto Arthur’s chest. He continued to grind his hard cock upwards, but it was much gentler now, slow rolls of his hips as one of his hands stroked your back. As you came down from your orgasm, you distantly noticed that the TV had stopped (stupid old piece of shit, never worked properly). You also realized just how uncomfortable the wetness of your pants was becoming, and you went to pull back. The hand that was caressing your back locked around your body. You shifted around, testing the give of his arms. Fully immobilized, but not necessarily complaining, you kissed his neck indulgently and wriggled your hips a little.

“As much as I’m enjoying this,” you purred into Arthur’s ear, “I really fucking want to suck you off.”

“Shit.”

You startled back as far as you could at the sound of his voice. The sweet brown-sugar baritone was shredded, gruff and way raspier than it had been.

Way raspier than it should have been, you thought.

You tried to pull back again. His arms didn’t budge. “Arthur, what’s up?” You asked gently.

A deep, quiet whine was his only response. “Did I do something wrong?” He tightened his grip on you, and your ribs groaned in protest. Your heartbeat began to climb as you squirmed again. “Arthur, let me go, you’re hurting me.”

The vice-like arms around you flew away from your body, a deep sigh of relief escaping your lungs. You went to pull back again, to look in his face and ask what was wrong, but his strangled voice stopped you in your tracks. “I’m sorry! I just… I didn’t want you to look at me.”

“Why? I’ve already seen you.”

“Not really. You wouldn’t be here if you had.” He sounded like he was about to cry.

Your heart squeezed painfully at the sound. Without a second thought, you leaned your face into the heated skin of his neck. You could feel hair there, thick and soft, that hadn’t been there before. “Whatever it is, I’ll do my best to not freak out. Or I can close my eyes and you can go, or calm down, or whatever you need to do. Just tell me what you want.”

“I want...I want to tell you,” he said, in that shy near-whisper of a shared secret. “You can look at me.”

Slowly, slow enough for him to tell you to stop, you shifted back to look at Arthur in the face. Whatever it was that you had been expecting, it wasn’t this. Thick, dark hair- no, now that you saw it up close it was very clearly fur- covered his face and neck, darkened his temples, sprung from his arms and hands. His jaw had broadened and lengthened, forming a sort of muzzle, and his canines had grown, pushing insistently at black-edged lips. Large claws tipped his furry hands. His gaze was dropped to his lap in what was clearly some combination of fear and shame, but…

You were undeniably intrigued by what you saw. Intrigued, confused, and more than a little aroused.

“You’re…”

“I’m a werebear.” Despite the new gruffness, his voice sounded fragile. “I’m a monster.”

You shook your head emphatically and leaned forward to put your arms around his shoulders. “I was going to say that you’re gorgeous, but sure, let’s go with that.”

Arthur blinked at you in confusion. “You’re not scared. Or disgusted.”

“Why should I be?” You asked. “You backed off when I told you to, you clearly don’t want to hurt me…”

“But I’m a monster!” He cut you off, heedless of how his hands moved to rest on your thighs. “I’m not normal, I’m not human.”

You silenced him with a finger to his lips. “And I don’t care. I like you quite a bit, if you couldn’t tell. This is just something fun and extra. I’m not going to run screaming for the hills, although I would like to know more about it, at some point..”

“Really?”

“Yes,” you said, all playfulness abandoning your face and voice, letting every ounce of sincerity you had in you spill over. “Really.”

Those large, furry arms wrapped around you, cradling your body against his in a warm embrace. You leaned into it, your hand rubbing the back of his neck. Hiccupping breaths stuttered through his chest and into you.

“Thank you,” his voice rumbled where it was tucked against your neck.

You shifted your weight in the hug, trying to ease the pressure on your knees, and felt his cock against the inside of your thigh. “Still hard?” You teased.

Arthur’s eyes shot open and he pulled away, face stained red under the fur. “Oh damn, I didn’t… shit, I’m sorry.!”

“Don’t apologize,” you cooed, careful not to brush his heated length. “Do you want me to help you with it? I did tell you how much I want to blow you.”

Seconds passed and you questioned whether you had crossed a line, staying stock-still until he nodded his head. “Yes, please.”

He sounded shy when he asked, and you couldn’t help but kiss the tip of his nose before slipping backwards off his lap to the floor. Now that you were level with his crotch, you could really take in just how big he was. The bulge in his pants had seemed large when he was under you, but in front of you it was massive. His thighs were thicker than they had been before, robust muscle and fat dwarfing your hands as you slid them up to his straining zipper. His body heat seared your palms through the fabric. You couldn’t help but wonder how you hadn’t noticed him shift beneath you. Without arousal clouding your brain, you could properly marvel at just how significant- how beautiful- his newly monstrous form was. Your hands paused over his fly and you looked up at him, staring through your lashes, silently waiting for permission to continue.

“Please touch me,” Arthur begged, his hips bucking up slightly.

You smiled at him, scooting forward and turning your head to kiss the inside of his knee, before slowly undoing his fly. Letting your fingers graze over him with maddening softness every time you could, you slid your hands up through the soft fur on his abdomen to push the bottom of his shirt out of the way. A groan escaped his mouth as you scratched over his stomach, into the warm, musky fur on his pelvis, and pulled the waistband of his boxers down just far enough for his dick to spring free, almost hitting you in the face.

The way he had pressed against the zipper of his pants had not done him justice. His shaft was easily the length of your forearm, the head flushed red and glistening with pre-cum. It bobbed and twitched with each minute movement of his body, a lewd display that you thought you could watch for hours. The base was surrounded by a nest of curly fur that you desperately wanted to bury your fingers- or your nose, dear Lord- into. A moment later, the euphoric realization came over you that you could.

You wasted no more time before ducking your head in and pressing an open, messy kiss to the underside of his length. Trailing your mouth along the thin skin, you happily made your way to that gorgeous dark fur. The feeling of nuzzling into it was unbelievable, the strands silky and thick on your skin, that lovely musk filling your senses and making your head go a little fuzzy. With a little moan, you pressed in closer, licking and kissing constantly, letting saliva slip out of your mouth to wet the base of Arthur’s shaft. You carefully tucked your fingers under the waist of his underwear to pull his balls free. They were covered in a dusting of that same fur, heavy and hot where you cupped them in your hands. You made your way back up his shaft, pausing indulgently to suck on the skin of his balls, relishing in the way that Arthur’s thighs quivered where they bracketed your shoulders. Clear, slick fluid dribbled from the head of his dick when you ran the tip of your tongue around its base. A drop fell to your face and you wiped it clean with the back of your hand.

“Oh shit.” His voice came out rumbly and strangled when you delicately lapped pre-cum from the prettily flushed head.

A quick glance upwards showed his bottom lip caught between wickedly sharp teeth, face reddened and eyes shut tight. You mentally promised yourself that one day, if Arthur gave you the chance, you would edge him until he cried with just your mouth.

This was not that day.

In a single swift motion, you stretched your mouth as far around his cock as it would go. You could barely take a quarter of the length and your jaw began aching in seconds, but all you could think was how damn good his heated flesh felt against the inside of your mouth. A moan broke free of your throat, sending vibrations down his massive cock. More pre-cum squirted directly into the back of your mouth and he bucked his hips up, only slightly, but still enough to make you choke around him and draw tears to your eyes.

His balls tightened where they were still cupped in your hands, and you could tell he was close. As disappointed as you were that you couldn’t keep going longer, you knew that he had already been close to his climax when you were dry-humping each other like a pair of horny teenagers. Besides, your jaw was really starting to hurt from where it was gaped around his huge girth. Pulling back far enough that his cockhead just barely rested against your lips, you paused for several seconds, never letting the slick tip leave your skin, smearing a combination of spit and pre-cum onto your mouth and cheeks. You panted, catching your breath for a few moments before you took him back in. Suckling delicately at his tip, you relished in the bursts of pre-cum that shot into you before steeling yourself, relaxing your throat, and swallowing his shaft as far as it would go.

Arthur cried out, the sound deliciously caught between a growl and a wail. His breaths turned ragged, control fraying from arousal and the effort it took him not to fuck upwards into your mouth. You desperately wanted him to feel good, and began working him over aggressively. You bobbed your head up and down, copious amounts of spit sliding down his shaft, gagging as you took him down as far as physically possible. Swallowing around him when his cock hit the back of your throat, your mouth rippled around him and you rolled his balls in your hands.

“I’m...fuck, I’m gonna cum!”

With a great deal of effort, you pulled your tongue back and probed it into the slit at the end of his head. Clearly the intrusion, coupled with the slick pressure of your mouth and loving caress of your hands, was too much, and it pushed him over the edge of his climax.

Salty, bitter cum shot down your throat in thick ropes, making you choke again. You swallowed as much as you could, but it was just too much, and you pulled off, coughing. His orgasm kept going, longer than any you had ever seen before, covering your face and torso with sticky cum. It dripped from your body onto the tile beneath you, spilled from the corners of your mouth, hung in creamy drops from your eyelashes.

A huge, clawed hand carefully wiped the spend from your eyes, moving to cup the back of your head. “Are you okay?” Arthur’s voice was gentle and concerned under the animalistic rasp.

You nodded tiredly, leaning into one of his thick thighs. Exhausted from the excitement, your eyes began to slip closed, your breath evening out into the shallow rhythm of sleep. The last thing you felt was a sweet kiss on your forehead and Arthur’s deep rumbly baritone.

“We’ll talk when you wake up. I promise.”

[colorseeingchick]

Cheer you up, Calm you down (Iwa, Suna, Kuroo)

Life is full of ups and downs! And the downs can come in all forms. But no matter what it is and how you seek to be comforted, these boys will have your back. 

A/N: This is part 1 of a longer series I have planned. All the boys are given different Y/Ns with different personalities and different scenarios. But that’ll become more clear in the next parts, I think. But regardless, I hope you enjoy part 1! 

Warnings: Language. These are all meant to be ambiguous as to whether they are romantic or platonic. Interpret as you wish!

Iwaizumi Hajime: with a rambling Y/N

When you got the phone call, your heart dropped. He was… with another girl? 

You shouldn’t have cared. You shouldn’t have. You guys weren’t dating or anything. But at the same time, you two had been talking for months. And he went out of his way to tell you that he was going to be ‘with the boys.’ So why did he lie? What game was he tryna play? 

You weren’t ready to process the sadness, so instead you decide to break down the anger boiling in your stomach. Which is why you had been fuming over the phone for hours to Iwaizumi.

“Hello?” 

“He’s a two timing pig.” 

“Who?”

As you explain everything over and speak out your heart, Iwa listens. You noted when the other side of the line went silent, but continued to ramble into the phone. 

“Are you driving?” You ask him as you hear a breeze coming from Iwa’s side. 

“Just an open window,” he dismisses. You didn’t have too much time to question it. Your answer came when you heard a knock at the door. 

“What? What are you… doing here?” pulling your phone down from your face, you let confusion enter your trashed puddle of emotions (mainly dominated by frustration).

“Surprise. It’s been an hour and you’re still mad. And I can’t listen to you forever.” Iwaizumi leans against the doorframe, arms crossing in front of him. “So let’s go.” You saw his shiny motorcycle parked close to the curb of your driveway, teasing you with the notion of a joyride. 

“Are you serious?” 

“Yeah, anything to get you over this shit. Let’s go.” 

As you follow Iwa out, you adjust your weight on the bike, pulling closer to him as he revs the bike. “Don’t squeeze me. Just hold onto my waist, okay?”

Feeling the wind scratch your cheeks and pull tears from your eyes, a smile shines bright on your face. The frustration and anger that constricted your chest had been completely ripped away, the floating feeling in your belly causing bubbly joy to replace it as Iwaizumi guns it on the straight road ahead. 

“Better?” Iwaizumi asks you as he tugs his helmet off, parked back on your driveway. You rest your head against his back, hands wrapped around his stomach, a smile plastered on your face. 

“Yeah.” 

“Good. Don’t waste your energy being pissed about that mother fucker. Not worth it.”

You scoff, smile unfaltering. “You’re right. I’ll just use that energy to bother you instead.” He sighs. But you just know he’s smiling. 

“Looking forward to it.” 

Suna Rintarou: with a Y/N on a rampage

Pacing your basement hallway, you were absolutely ready to tear a new one to the next unfortunate soul that walked in. 

You’d just gotten back from a very long, complicated, messy meeting with a bunch of your teammates and coaches. A teammate who had hated you for seemingly no reason had just spent the last 3 hours trying to accuse you of something you never did. But for those 3 hours you were shocked to find that you had to actually defend you. Of course they realized you were innocent by the end, but they all just let that happen. No one defended you. Not even your ‘friends.’ You were livid, deep in a ‘I hate the world and want to watch it burn’ mood. Hence why you wanted to tear apart whoever was unfortunate enough to cross paths with you. 

You were not ready for that person to be Suna Rintarou. 

“Suna what the heck are you doing here? Did you see my texts?”

“Y/N-”

“I swear if you didn’t read them I’m gonna be so mad. I literally cannot believe this is even happening right now.” Your voice shakes as you stew in your own anger. 

“Y/N…”

“I’ve never been angrier in my whole life I swear, this is unreal, absolutely unreal. Absolutely unacceptable. I literally cannot believe that they’re all absolute-”

You’re cut off when Suna grabs your hand, squeezing it abruptly. 

“What the-” 

He turns your palm up and places a rectangular item (that he’d been storing in his hoodie’s pocket)  into your grasp. After he pulls away, you take a moment to inspect the item. 

“The hell is this…” You blink-

And process. 

“Why did you give me a snicker’s bar?”

“Because you’re not you when you’re hungry,” Suna deadpans. 

“...”

“...”

“That’s so not funny, Suna.”

“Then why’re you smiling.”

Unfortunately, he’d got you there. You were no less angry, but the flow of anger had been interrupted by a new flow of amusement. 

“Suna I’m being fucking serious right now, I can’t-”

You’re stopped this time by the rough jolt of your body forward as Suna roughly pulls your hoodie over your head, and then squeezes you in a hug. 

“It’s shitty, I know. But everything is a lil less shitty with chocolate. Deep breath, eat, and then you can rant to me. I’m caught up on the texts.”

“...thank you.”

“No problem. But break a piece of the snickers off for me, will ya?”

“Aw hell nah this is my chocolate now!”

“Never buying you chocolate again.”

Kuroo Tetsurou: with a Y/N who just needs to get it out

“I’m literally gonna murder him.”

“Ya know, you should really stop staying stuff like that- cuz if he mysteriously dies and they take you to court, I’ll be the one who has to testify that you threatened murder. And I don’t really want that.”

“I know I know- you know I wouldn’t  actually do anything but UGH!” You pound the ground against you in a fit of rage while Kuroo watches you, laying down on the hill you both had retreated to. 

“I cannot believe him. It’s absolutely insane that he just keeps getting away with this shit and nobody does ANYTHING about it! And then they have the audacity to make me out to be the bad guy?! It’s so freakin’ bogus.” 

“They still haven’t done anything about it huh.”

“And they won’t. Surprise surprise. Everyone sucks at holding people accountable once it's their ‘favorite student’ that has all the flaws. I’m so over all of this.” 

Kuroo perches upwards at the sound of your voice cracking, keying in on how frustrated and emotionally exhausted you truly were. 

“What do you want to do about it?”

“I don’t know. All I want right now is for my chest to stop hurting. This is so frustrating.” You try your best to keep it together in front of him, but he knew better. He knew much better. 

“C’mere.” Kuroo wraps his arms around you, burying your face into his chest. “Scream.”

“Huh?” He had to know how odd of a request that was. 

“Bury your face in my chest and just like, scream. Yell. Cry. Whatever you want. You’ll feel better. Get it out.”

“...mm…” 

And so you did. You muffled your screams into Kuroo’s shirt, your throat going raw, your tears falling down, and his firm hold unwavering. As you pull away slowly, he gives you a firm shoulder pat before checking up again. “Better?” 

“Yeah. Better.”

Notes: 

Iwa’s is based off my best guy friend who’s a motorcyclist. I fully headcanon Iwa having a bike he HAS THE VIBES. 

If you don’t get Suna’s comment please watch this video: here

Kuroo’s situation is not based off a personal one but, the ‘casually threatening murder’ is very much like me. And it makes all my pre-law friends very worried sometimes. 

These are all SO SHORT I kinda hate it but expect the next parts to be...much longer lol I suck at concision. 

[katsukisbimbo]

Kuroo x Volleyball Player! Reader

Kuroo Tetsurou x Volleyball Player! Reader

wordcount: 3,087

genre: strangers-to-lovers au with fluff, crack and a little bit of smut :)))

summary: meeting kuroo tetsurou might be the best thing that has ever happened to you

first of all

kuroo pissed you off to no end

absolutely pissed you off

the first time you met him was when you were a first year

your brother keishin has asked you to come with them for the practice match they had with nekoma

the moment you got to school you had to DASH to go to the washroom because you had to pEee

gosh

curse your tiny bladder

when you went out everyone was already on the bus

sigh

you were gonna have to sit with someone you don’t know

because FOR SURE

your stupid brother keishin would be sitting next to takeda-sensei

the moment you hopped on the bus

everyone suddenly became quiet

0.0

everyone was jus like

uh

who’s this cutie

is she lost

she’s from shiratorizawa what’s she doing here

huh

and noya and tanaka are just screaming at this point

“wHO IS THIS GODDESS WHO DECIDED TO BLESS US WITH HER PRESENCE?!?!? I LOVE YOU PLEASE SIT NEXT TO ME RYU GET OUT NO I DONT CARE GET OUT”

cue tanaka landing on the floor

“nOYA-SAN WHY”

and you’re just like

lmao what

and literally all the seats are taken except for the guy who literally yeeted his bald friend into the next dimension

sigh

i guess you had to sit next to the cutie huh

you look at your brother pleading for help

but he just ignores you and talks to sensei

sIGH

your brother was so thirsty that he didn’t even CARE if these boys ate you alive

gosh

it’s okay

it be like that

f in the chat for y/n

oKAY enough self pitying

you reluctantly sit beside the really loud guy

“hi my names ukai y/n! what’s your name?”

“m-my name is n-nishinoya yuu”

cue noya looking like a literal tomato

“nice to meet you!! i’m excited to work with you nishinoya-san! if i may ask, what year are you in?”

“iM in sEcond yEar”

gosh noya’s so proud

“oH you’re my senpai then!! it’s really nice to meet you senpai!! i hope we have a good trip”

GAHSJDJSHS

you called him senpai

without him asking you to

GOSH

could you be any more perfect

“agHjsjdhsjajszjJAK”

“those aren’t words...”

“...”

“...”

and at that point noya was brain fried so you just put on your earphones and chilled

...

...

*gagging*

“hINATAAGAHAJSKSHS”

what

what was going on

you turned your head

and you saw this orange haired babie throwing up on the bald guy who got yeeted

and suddenly

chaos ensued

everyone was screaming because of the stench

you were gagging so hard that you felt your breakfast coming back up

but your seat buddy was having the time of his life laughing at his two friends who were having a dilemma

gosh

today was gonna be crazy

finally you guys had finally arrived at nekoma and honestly that’s as the most chaotic car ride you’ve ever experienced

but luckily on the way you’ve made yourself familiar with everyone on the team

especially the third year cuties

and no you did not say that to their faces because you’re shy :((

you guys finally get out of the bus and you see

a god

with crazy looking hair

“well if it isn’t the crows” “did you have a good ride here you country bumpkins?”

and daichi’s bout to lose it

“kuroo-san nice to see you again”

and you can definitely feel the tension in the air

was it just you or is it hot in here

kuroo suddenly turned to look at you and honestly you’ve never been more intimidated in your life because wow

he’s beautiful

“who’s the pretty girl daichi-san? is she your girlfriend?”

“no no she’s our couch’s sister”

“hi i’m ukai y/n, nice to meet you”

and you shake his hand and you’re SHOCKED

“kuroo tetsurou, likewise”

his hand is so warm n rough oh god

you suddenly wonder what it would feel like to have his hands slowly wrap around your throat as he starts to thru-

NO

nO DIrtY ThOuGhTs

bad

bad y/n

you’ve been so caught up in your day dream that you didn’t realize that you were still hold kuroos hand

and you look up to see kuroo looking like a smug little shit as if he was saying

‘are you ever gonna let go or?’

and it really made you wanna hit him

really badly

you wanted to punch his mouth

with your mouth

GAHSJDGA

stOp

okay anyways

you snatch your hands away from kuroo and he just smirks at you like a smug little bastard

“what’s wrong kitten? didn’t wanna let go of my hand?”

at this point you’re too flustered to even talk so you take it as the time to back off and just let kuroo be a little fuckhead

but suddenly you’re snatched by tanaka and noya

you somehow end up bumping into kiyoko and you’re just like “omg i’m so sorry kiyoko-san i didn’t mea-“

“don’t worry about it y/n-chan, accidents happen”

and wow

wow

a goddess

now you see what tanaka and noya see

she’s beautiful

maybe you do want the best of both worlds.....

...

...

ANYWAYS

tanaka and noya end up showing you off to their equally as weird friend taketora and of course like the normal person you are you greet him and introduce yourself

but before he even gets the chance to talk kiyoko’s already pulling you away telling you that she needed some help with setting up some of their gear

and of course like the puppy you are you follow her because yes you’re in love with her

i mean

who isn’t

lesbi honest

everyone’s a simp for kiyoko

moving on

finally they’ve started to play a match

and you’re very impressed

especially by hinata and kageyama because wow their skill was amazing

and hinata’s jumps were crazy

obviously you played volleyball yourself being ukai’s grand daughter

and you weren’t that bad

considering the fact that you play for japan’s u19 team with ushijima

who was a very close senpai to you

so close to the point where you’d call him your older brother

rip keishin

back to the game

everyone in karasuno was very promising and you were getting excited with the ideas that were flooding into your head

but nekomas not too bad either

they were pretty solid with their defence and some people might think that it’s all about the attacks but

your attack doesn’t mean anything if the ball doesn’t touch the floor in the court

you were very impressed with the bedhead’s receives a n d blocking

every time he managed a good save or blocked anyone he would always glance in your direction

and it may or may not have made you feel nervous because who doesn’t get nervous when an attractive person looks at you

sadly

the game finished rather quickly

at this point everyone was already cleaning up and of course you decided to help

you thought that you would be able to play just a little bit but your brother just wanted you to familiarize yourself with the teams before you went on the week long training camp with them

which was in two weeks

:)

you were trying to take the volleyball net down until a tall figure comes up behind you and takes the net from you

you turn around and guess who it is

kuroo frocking tetsurou

what a surprise

“don’t worry about it peaches i got it”

wha

did this man just call you PEACHES

peaches as in the scary girl who goes to famous peoples houses?

i think NOT sir

“pEACHES? what is that supposed to mean??! huh?!?”

“woah woah calm down babe, it’s just a nickname. i call you peaches cuz you smell like peaches”

ohhh

okay

that’s fine

“i’ve been wondering though, if you smell like peaches then would you taste like peaches??”

wHAT

wHATSGFSZHSJ

rip y/n’s remaining brain cells

“how about it doll? are you gonna give little old me a taste?”

and he’s suddenly pushing himself closer to you

and you close your eyes because it really looks like he’s about to kiss you and omg it’s like your first kiss hELP

but instead of a kiss

he just laughs at you

this man is literally bent over and CACKLING his lungs out

“you’re so cute doll, i wouldn’t kiss you without your permission. plus i gotta take you out first. wanna go on a date with me some time?”

and you’re just so caught off guard

that you can’t even manage a verbal response

like you just nod your head and then he’s ruffling you’re hair and walking away with the volleyball net

what the hell just happened

did you just score yourself a date

yes

yes you did

you go girl

sadly

it’s time for you and your babies to go

and kuroo being the good person he is

walks you guys out

but before you can get on the bus

kuroo pulls you to the side and bends down to your height to whisper in your ear

“text me sometime peaches”

and you suddenly feel him putting a piece of paper in your back pocket

then he’s pushing you onto the bus and you’re just dumbfounded

did he just touch your bum

could he not just hand it to you

not that you were complaining,,, but now you just wanna know what it would feel like if he just grabbed your bum with both of his hands while you sit on his la-

nO

BAD

BAD

BAD

gosh you have it bad for this boy

the moment you got him you debated whether to text him or not

i mean

you didn’t even look at the piece of paper yet

so you go into you back pocket and open the paper

��xxx-xxx-xxxx text me when you get home peaches, i already miss your pretty face -kuroo’

WHY IS HE SO CUTE

you get up and start looking for your phone

and you spend like 6 minutes trying to think of what to say

but you finally settled with

hi :)

hopefully that was normal enough

and not even 1 minute later you already got a reply

hey cutie :) did you get home safe

wHY IS HE SO DARN CUTE

and your conversation goes from there

you guys literally talk about everything

from his favourite colour to the time when your leg fell in a hole and you slammed your whole body on the ground causing your ribs to shift and now whenever somebody touches the top of your chest they can feel the top of your ribs

(that was actually a true story and yes it happened to me and yes my ribs are very very fucked up but i’m still alive soooo)

by the time you were back in tokyo

you and kuroo were basically best friends

you guys texted, called, and facetimed every day

you stepped out of the bus and low and behold

it was kuroo waiting for you

“tETSUU”

you run to him and jump in his arms

and he catches you and swings you around a few times

everyone was just like

o.o

‘when did they get so close’

and your older brothers just like

>:(

this is n o t good shaggy

and kuroo introduces you to everyone

especially his buddies bokutou, akaashi, and kenma

and bokutou’s bombarding you with questions

and he asks why you’re wearing a shiratorizawa sweater

and you’re just like ‘i go to school there..’

and he’s just like

“oH YOU KNOW USHIJIMA? IM IN THE TOP 5 ACES RANKING WITH HIM IM SO COOL RIGHT”

“bokuto-san i think you’re scaring her”

“aKAAASHGHSI YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO SAY ‘bokuto-san you’re so cool’”

and you and kuroo are just laughing your asses off

while kenma’s playing with his psp

pspspspspsppss

“bokuto-san you’re so cool”

“aKAAASHUDID YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO SAY IT EARLIER”

at that point you and kuroo have already walked away

and he brings you to your room

and helps you settle down your things

gosh he’s such a gentleman

y/n was ready to risk it all for this man

“peaches you okay?”

“oH i’m fine yes yes i’m fine tetsu”

“okaaaayyyy if you say so peaches” and kuroos just going through your bag checking if you have snacks

“tetsu i don’t have any snacks in there for you”

“really? what do you mean? you do have a snack for me tho”

and you’re jus like lol no i don’t

and he’s slowly walking towards you and you highkey feel intimidated but fuck that you’re not a bussy

at this point kuroo’s sitting on your legs while his arms are slowly creeping up your sides

and in your head

you’re just like

‘ahh this is it i’m gonna have a heart attack’

and suddenly

kuroo’s tickling you and you’re crying on the floor because HSJDJH

TICKLES

“tETSU PLEASE I CANT BREATHEEHHHD”

“what’s that peach? i cant hear you”

“tETSU YOU DIPSHIT PLEASE STOPFDISHS”

���hmm i don’t know, i think i’ll stop if you say ‘nya’ for me”

“gO TO HELLSKDIS”

“come on pretty, say it for me”

you’re blushing sO HARD

“n-nya”

and kuroo just freezes up because he didn’t think that you’d actually do it

“tetsu? u ok?”

“...”

“...”

“...”

“tetsu”

“o-oH yeah i’m fine silly i was just thinking”

“what were you thinking about neko-chan?”

“you.”

GAHSJDJSHSGS

he was going to be the death of you

you, kuroo, bokutou, akaashi, hinata, and tsukishima suddenly ended up at an empty gym

and you guys wanted to play a match so

why not

it was you, kuroo, and tsukki

versus bokutou, hinata, and akaashi

it was a very intense but fun game

akaashi set to bokutou and bokutou did a cross shot

which wasn’t properly blocked by tsukishima

but luckily you were there to pick it up

and kuroo set to you and you slammed it down before they could even block you

the whole gym was silent

wha

how did-

hUH

“peach what”

“what tetsu”

“since when were you so good at volleyball”

“tetsu i play for japan’s u19 team, why did you think i was here in the first place? i’m here to help you guys”

and hinata’s just yelling

“y/n-cHAN I DIDNT KNOW YOU PLAYED NO WONDER WHY YOU LOOKED SO FAMILLIAR OMGJDSI”

after you got exposed

it was only you and tetsu left in the gym

after everything was cleaned up

kuroo pulled you aside before you could leave the gym

“t-tetsu what’re you doing? the gym lights are already of-“

“shut up for one second”

o.o

ogey then

“peaches i really like you. i know that we haven’t known each other long but it feels like i’ve known you since forever. will please let me take you out”

what

...

did he just

yes he did

“t-tetsu,,, i really like you too, and i would love it if we could go out on a date sometime”

and at that moment tetsu just

“HELL YEAHHH”

and he’s getting close to you again

to the point where he’s pressing you against the wall

he cups your cheek and leans closer to your face

“peaches,, can i please kiss you right now”

“yeah”

you close your eyes as you feel tetsu’s hot breath hovering other your soft lips

gosh

this was it

your were gonna kiss tetsu

your crush

until

...

...

...

...

“gET YOUR HANDS OFF MY SISTER BRAT”

and kuroos just like

wHAT THE FUCK

it’s your brother

keishin

“nII-SAN WHY”

“gET OVER HERE RIGHT NOW Y/N”

and you sadly look up at tetsu

and he just smiles at you and gestures for you to go

until you get up on your tippy toes and kiss tetsu full on the mouth

you catch him by surprise but he quickly kisses you back

you wrap your arms around his neck and slowly work your way up into his hair until you’ve got a good grip on him

kuroos hands weren’t staying still either

his hands were slowly creeping down your sides until he grabs the back of your thighs and pulls you up and holds you against him

his hands end up on your bum

and then

he squeezes

“THAT IS IT Y/N STOP SUCKING FACE AND GET OVER HERE”

oops

[jean-kayak]

This is a weird idea I’ve had but can I request a smut drabble of Hawks crushing on a black!fem!reader who’s a twitch streamer/gamer (that’s a fan of his) and they start meeting up a lot until they start dating? He’s not bothered by the thirst comments she gets despite how open she is about being taken but Hawks is possessive (thanks to bird instincts) and he fucks her after her stream talking about how those horny bastards would never be with her cuz she’s his.

A/N: Anon, I love this idea! It’s not weird at all! Here it is, and I’m sorry it took so long, but I hope you like it!

Pairing: Hawks (Keigo Takami) x black!fem!gamer!reader

Word Count: 1,356

Warnings: possessive Hawks, (smut 18+!!), unprotected sex, fingering, ass slapping (once)

Hawks doesn't really know how he managed to find your channel, let alone learn about Twitch, but once he found you, he couldn't find a good reason to not watch your streams.

He had the app downloaded on his phone so he would get notifications every time you went live. He decided to come up with some random username, opting to not use his real name, though he doubts you'd believe it was the real Hawks.

He was completely hooked, and he didn't even know it until he realized that he would be racing home to make sure he was on time to tune into your streams. He thought at first that maybe he just enjoyed the gaming content that you put out, but he slowly started to realized that he was quickly developing a crush on you.

He noticed that he would be engrossed in your stories about how your day went or stories from your past. He found himself smiling fondly at how happy you would get whenever you won a round of whatever game you were playing. Or how cute he thought you looked when you didn't put much effort into your appearance, especially when you were doing hour-long streams, a bonnet on your head, and a ratty old t-shirt covering your torso.

He really starts tuning in when he finds out that you're a huge fan of his after someone had asked you who you're favorite hero was. He couldn't help when his confidence rose when you excitedly talked about him.

It gave him enough confidence to try and actually contact you, hoping to eventually meet you in person. He messaged you on social media while you were on stream, and you just happen to glance at your phone, and he couldn't erase the smile on his face when he saw your reaction.

You both hit it off instantly, exchanging numbers which led to the both of you finally meeting each other in person, and you definitely look way better in person.

His crush only continued to grow bigger, and he'd never thought he'd actually have the chance to date you, but here you both are going three months strong.

Of course, your relationship was kept secret, for his sake, and mostly for yours mostly, but that doesn't mean that he doesn't get jealous by the thirst comments you constantly receive.

He knows you're beautiful, that's what drew him in besides your personality, but he can't help the feeling stirring at the pit of his stomach when he sees the comments on your social media. Especially on stream.

One day, he tuned in to one of your streams while he was at work, and that day, the comments seemed to be more forward than they usually were. You've mentioned that you were taken, but that only spurred some of them on, and Hawks couldn't ignore the anger rising inside of him.

You weren't wearing anything spectacular, just a simple tank top, but that appeared to be enough for all of the horny people in the chat. He wasn't even paying attention to your stream anymore, he was focused on the comments flooding in.

Some saying how hot you were, others saying that they could treat you way better than your boyfriend could, and for the rest of his shift, Hawks was a little bit tougher than necessary, needing to take out his frustration somehow before he could see you.

You've just finished your stream, massaging your ears once you take your headphones off before you hop into bed, scrolling aimlessly through your phone.

You jump out of your skin as you drop your phone when you hear something landing on your balcony. You physically relax as you sigh, putting a hand on your chest as you scoff lightly. "Keigo, oh my God, you scared the life out of me."

You don't even get a chance to move, Keigo already on top of you, his lips covering yours, his body encompassing yours. You easily accept his tongue, your mouth opening easily as you moan into the kiss.

You pull away, realizing that he's shirtless, the only clothes remaining are his pants. You look up at him to ask him what's gotten into him, but when your eyes meet his, the words seem to disappear.

His eyes are filled with lust and primal hunger, and you can't help the shiver that goes down your spine as you feel wetness pool at your core. "You're mine, right, kid?" he asks, not waiting for an answer as he attacks your neck, his hands trailing down to your shorts, ripping them off in a second.

His fingers are stimulating your bundle of nerves as soon as he gets them off, and the last thing you're thinking about it is answering. He bites down on your neck softly as he repeats himself. "Yes! Yes, I'm all yours," you sigh as he puts marks all over your neck that you know you're going to have a hard time covering up.

He's already able to slide in two fingers easily, your back arching off the bed as he curls his fingers, hitting your spot instantly. He works in a third as he thumbs at your clit, your hands gripping his shoulders as he smirks at how easy you become undone under him.

He can't help the sense of pride he feels as he watches you cum on his fingers, his name coming out of your mouth breathless as you gush all over his fingers.

You barely have enough time to come down from your high when you're flipped over on your stomach as he guides onto your knees, arching your back before getting rid of the rest of his clothes.

You try to turn your head, but you're stopped short when you feel him pushing into you, the stretch making your mouth drop open as you moan loudly. He's already pounding into you, your body still sensitive from your first orgasm as you cry out into the room, the noises you're making almost drowning out the sound of the bed frame creaking.

"Who's making you feel this good?" he growls, his grip on your hips tight, and you can already feel the bruises starting to form. You can hardly get out the words, the last thing on your mind is attempting to form a coherent sentence.

A smack vibrates through the room, the pain blooming on your ass making you whine. "Who's making you feel this good?!" he repeats as he picks up his pace, and your eyes roll to the back of your head as you grip the sheets underneath you.

"Fuck. You are, Kei," you manage, and you can hear his wings puff up, opening your eyes to see the shadow spread across the headboard.

He reaches around you to rub at your clit harshly, and you jolt, feeling that knot getting tighter. "Shit, who owns this tight cunt? Fuck," he swears, and you don't answer fast enough, and you let out a small scream when he pinches your clit. "Answer me," he demands.

"You do Kei. It's all yours," you sigh, and he doesn't even try to fight the satisfied smile that finds its way onto his face.

"Say my name, baby bird. Scream it." The only thing coming out of your mouth is chants of his name as you drool onto the pillow, and he fucks you faster as he thinks about all of those comments that he read, and how none of them could make you like this.

"Kei!" you shout, the knot snapping as you cum hard, your body going taut then limp, the only thing holding you up now is the rough fingers digging into your hips.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck," he grits as he fucks you through your high, chasing his. He cums with a low growl before folding over you. You wince at the overstimulation when he pulls out, and you flop over on your side, your breathing ragged from exertion.

"You read the comments again, didn't you?" you ask with an airy chuckle as he looks at the bedsheets.

"...No."

[mageofseven]

Could I request MC hanging out with the brothers but having a hard time enjoying it cuz they’re stressed from school? How long would it take for each of them to notice MC just isn’t having fun and what would they do?

Of course, Nonnie! I actually really like this prompt~

~

Lucifer:

The oldest noticed within the first day of them being stressed

However, he left them to handle it on their own, thinking it was just a rough day and that they should be better by tomorrow.

When tomorrow came and they weren't better, the man grew concerned.

He invited them out to dinner Friday to take their mind off of whatever has been plaguing them.

When the human didn't seem to be able to relax during dinner, he simply sighed.

"Please, tell me what has had you so tense these last few days."

They told him that their Devildom History class was getting too overwhelming; there was too much that happened in the last few millennia and too many dates to remember. They felt they couldn't keep up like the rest of the class could.

"MC, the rest of the class has been studying this material for a few hundred years at least." The man reminded them. "Neither Diavolo nor myself expects you to work at the same level as the other students."

He admired that MC took their studies seriously, but found it silly that they would compare themselves to students who were so much older than themselves, even if they didn't appear so.

After dinner, he took them for a relaxing evening stroll, which helped the human clear their head a bit.

Mammon:

He knew within the first couple of days they were stressed out.

The second brother took them out to a party and usually they loved parties, but that night they just... felt weirdly distant. They would say that they're having fun, but it all just seemed... force.

The man didn't like it. He pulled them to the side.

"Oi! Enough with the fake smiles, Human!" He told them. "What's with the silence?"

MC stared at the ground.

"I...I failed the exam last week." She mumbled. "The teacher handed the tests back Monday and it was the worst I've done yet."

Really doesn't understand it.

Yeah, he gets anxiety when he fails stuff too, but that's only 'cause of Lucifer. He doesn't actually care about his grades beyond that.

Takes them home since they aren't really feeling it. The two hangout in his room, blasting music as they curl up on the couch together.

MC is still upset, but appreciated the closeness.

Leviathan:

Doesn't really notice at first, too absorbed in the video game.

When he finally passing the level he's been struggling with for the past hour, he turns to MC, seeking praise, but the human isn't looking at the screen or him, but rather into space.

Immediately feels dejected. Is he boring them? Probably. Who could have fun with an otaku like him? That's the thoughts running through his head that start spilling from his mouth.

MC has to reassure him for a while that what he's worried about simply isn't true before explaining things.

The amount of classes you were expected to take here at RAD was... overwhelming. Eight different classes that demanded so many hours of studying outside of it.

MC didn't even feel like it was okay to be spending time with Levi right now because her anxiety kept screaming at her that she was falling behind.

Boy is instantly awkward upon hearing about their stress.

How...how was he supposed to help? The otaku did not have the social skills for it.

MC sighed.

"I should...probably just head back to my room--"

Panicking, Levi grabbed their arm.

"Levi?"

The man looked away before tugging them close, letting the human lay their head on his shoulder.

"J-Just... relax." He mumbled, face red.

MC gave the demon an odd look before giving a small smile and snuggling into his side.

It didn't solve their issue, but the human appreciated his worry.

Satan:

Noticed the stress as it developed.

MC was struggling to keep up in their Seductive Speechcraft class and it was taking its toll on them.

Didn't want to say anything until they come to him however; this is their business after all and he didn't want to bug them about it if they just wanted to handle it by themselves.

Still quietly worried though.

Invites them to his room one evening to read together, hoping some quiet time will help them relax.

He saw that their gaze usually found it's way more towards the window than down at their book however.

The man sighed, lowering his book.

"Alright, please tell me about it."

"Huh?" They turned to him, confused.

"You have concerns about the Seductive Speechcraft material, correct?"

"I... yes." They mumbled, looking away from the blonde.

"Well, what about it is stressing you out?"

MC blushed.

"I... I understand most of it from a theoretical standpoint, but... the actual use of it all is difficult for me. I always score low on the practical exams."

The demon smirked.

"Well, I suppose some practice would be the answer."

The two have a rather enjoyable study session. It was actually useful to the human though and they felt more confident with the material.

Asmodeus:

Notices it while the two are out shopping.

Asmo just came out of the dressing room and expected compliments about the outfit. When they never came, the man pouted.

Despite loudly announcing his entrance, the human was still staring into space.

"MCCCC, Look at me!"

MC glanced at him.

"Looks great..."

The fifth brother huffed.

"Doll... what is it?"

MC sighed and just kept it vague, saying school was just a bit much for them right now.

Asmo frowned. He went and paid for the outfit before leaving with the human.

He dragged them straight to his room, earning a confused look from the human.

Spa Day, begin! Massages, nail polish, face masks, the whole nine yards!

The two talked and Asmo listened his Doll vent about some other students in her class talking shit about them, even though MC was pretty sure they had never talked to those demons before since coming to the Devildom.

Hypes up his human tells them how wonderful they are and that those demons obviously have no life.

Tells them that those jerks aren't really worth their time-- but if MC is interested in revenge, he's got some dirt ready for them.

Beelzebub:

Probably the brother who is the most sensitive to their mood shift.

It comes with the territory; Beel is more or less the rock of his family, helping them out whenever he can

And, especially when it comes to Belphie, Beel has learned to be observant with these sort of things.

So when MC first showed signs of stress, the poor boy was worried.

He's still a pretty quiet guy though so he wasn't really sure how to approach the topic with them.

Asks them to walk with him to Madam Screams

It was a quiet walk. Once there, he managed to get them to order something though, which made Beel feel a little better.

On the walk back, that's when he decided to speak up.

"So," He finished the last bite of his donut. "Are you feeling okay?"

The human shrugged.

"I dunno." They stared at the brownie in their hand. "Just kinda... I dunno."

Beel, not interrupting them, gives MC a minute to collect their thoughts and continue.

"Hey... is it possible to drop classes at RAD with me being an exchange student?"

The redhead raised an eyebrow at the human.

"Nevermind, it nothing..."

"Are you having trouble with a class?"

MC stared down at her feet as she walked.

"Maybe..." They mumbled. "My Hexes class is just... it goes a bit too fast for me. I don't think I'm really learning anything."

The demon listened as the human talked about how behind they were in the class and how overwhelming it was. At one point, they even started tearing up.

Beel stopped in his tracks, pulling them into a hug.

MC looked up at him surprise.

"It'll be fine." He promised. "Let's go talk to Lucifer about this, okay."

The human nodded, causing a tear to fall on her cheek.

Before they could wipe it though, Beel did for them.

"Let's go home." He gave them a small smile.

MC smiled back.

Beel felt that he couldn't do much to help, but was glad he could direct them to Lucifer, who could.

Belphegor:

This boy notices more than people think.

The human just seemed out of it during the day

And even sought him out for naps when it was usually the other way around

MC just seemed so disconnected from him and his brothers those last few days, not to mention a bit tense.

That's what led them to the planetarium.

The two laid on the floor, looking up at the ceiling.

Though the human still seemed distracted, they at least seemed calmer.

That wasn't enough for the demon though.

He gave a big sigh.

"So what's the problem?"

"Huh?" MC looked over at him, confused.

"You heard me; what's your problem."

The human bit their lip.

Belphie rolled his eyes and pulled the human to his chest.

"You can talk to me, Dummy."

"I just... I've been having some trouble at school is all."

Belphie narrowed his eyes.

"What trouble?"

MC sighed.

"There's this guy in my Hexes class who... he's not all that nice." They explained. "He put a fake flame on my uniform Monday and made me embarrass myself in front of the class while trying to put it out... and all my teacher did was shame me for not recognizing illusion spell he used."

Belphie's arms tightened around them.

"Give me a name."

"Belphie, no."

"Why not?"

"Because I know what you are going to do and I don't want you getting in trouble for me."

The boy huffed, annoyed.

"Then tell Lucifer or something; don't let them get away with that!"

"But... if I tell Lucifer, the teacher will probably get in trouble too and the last thing I need is to get on their bad side, especially in a class I already struggle with."

"Then maybe he could get them replaced or something, I dunno, but you shouldn't just lie down and take it."

MC didn't say anything, just hid their face in his chest.

The demon closed his eyes, letting himself calm down before laying his hand on their head.

"I care about you, Butthead." He told them. "Now you gotta start caring about yourself too."

The two ended up falling asleep together on the floor. Nothing really change, but cuddling up with Belphie and explaining the situation really did make them feel a bit better.

[subtlereferencetomyinterests]

I Taste Honey but I Haven’t Seen the Hive - Chapter Seven

Ao3,   Masterpost,  C.1   C.2   C.3   C.4   C.5   C.6

Relationships: eventual queer-platonic intruality, platonic dlampr.

okay. so. last time we heard anything out of me was *New Years*, Literally, and maybe i should’ve mentioned that I was taking a little hiatus, but oh well. i’m back now and i’m gonna post the last three chapters of this fanfiction as soon as I possibly can (so probably like all of them will be up by tmrw at the latest!!) to make up for my absence. but jokes on you, cuz I did actually finish this thing!!! >:P 

(oh yeah, and there are no italics, thanks to tumblr’s copy/paste bulls//t. i continue to be lazy :3 if anything sounds stilted just imagine that theres an italicized word there and yeah.)

Warnings: cursing, sexual innuendo, discussions of sexuality, misunderstandings, Emotional Conversations, sharing a bed, mild body horror (remus’ existence lol), stress, h/c. 

Word count: 7,967

The hallway was cold, and dark. It had been long-since abandoned of any life, with every door shut and each light dimmed- even Virgil’s. That day- the day of the meeting- had exhausted everyone enough to send them right to sleep mode. 

Everyone except Remus and Patton.

Their heart-to-heart in the kitchen had dragged on a little longer than either had expected, letting night descend fully over the Mindpalace. Patton was the one to notice the time eventually, and drag his less-than-restful friend up the stairs with him- he could tell that the other was dead tired, though. His stubborn determination not to end the conversation didn’t sit well, but Patton couldn’t think what to make of it, and they really did need some sleep. 

They reached Patton’s door first. He stopped in front of it, when Remus tugged his hand back insistently. He turned to him, letting out a confused hum, and was met with a scowl and a sigh.

Remus was looking even more resigned than he had when they first started talking that night. Patton waited, worried. 

“This isn’t, um,” Remus exhaled, ragged around the edges. “This isn’t a pick-up line, okay, and I know that it’ll sound that way and I know that it’s me but. I really don’t wanna be alone tonight.”

Oh. 

Patton’s heart ached- and his heart was big, it took up most of him. He felt the pain spread out from his center and into his fingertips and toes, hot and empathetic. Because how could he hear something like that, and not want to spend the rest of the night doting on the creature in front of him until that voice never sounded so small again, till he was as big and confident as he was meant to be?

“I don’t think I want to be alone, either,” Patton said.

Remus stared, his big scarlet eyes casting a faint glow in the dark. They were wide, cautiously hopeful.

“Yeah?” He muttered.

“Yeah.”

Patton opened the door, and led them both inside.

Remus shuffled around on the other side of the bed, but Patton was still, however much he wanted to squirm.

“Um.”

The movement stopped, and he flushed at the feeling of being watched in the dark. There really was no un-awkward way to say it, was there?

“Remus, since you’re staying, do you- um, do you mind doing me a favor?” 

Remus, little more than a silhouette, propped himself up on his elbow, a tilt to his head. “A favor? Of course, anything for you, Pat,” his words were a purr, and Patton could envision the suggestive smirk on his face in perfect clarity. Patton felt another well of discomfort bubble in his stomach.

“Could you at least wear some clothes, please?” 

There was a beat. Remus laughed, short and good-natured. 

“Yeah, I sorta figured I would. It’s no problem.”

“Thank you,” Patton sighed, relieved. 

“Don’t worry about it,” he paused, and that really would’ve been the end of it, but Patton had learned by then when Remus was about to make a joke. He took a little breath while the words were still clicking together in his head, and a grin crept into his voice. “There’s always tomorrow night to try this clothesless, eh?”

“I’m asexual,” Patton blurted, and he could feel the heat radiating from his face, though he didn’t even know why he was so uncomfortable. It was a joke, Remus was just joking. They were friends and Patton should’ve been used to it- but he’d already gotten so sensitive that night, and jokes like that always hit just a little different than the violent ones or the curses. It must have been a breaking point, or something. 

Remus shifted again, laying on his back. Patton wondered if he’d made things awkward. 

“Oh,” Remus said, “Oh wow, that makes so much sense!”

“It- It does?” Patton sat up, staring at the other with a mix of surprise and relief. Remus blinked up at him, nodding. 

“Well, yeah, that explains why you get so squirmy whenever anybody even implies something to do with sex. I always thought you were just, like, a prude.”

Patton ran his hands over the comforter that pooled around his legs, shrugging. He wasn’t nervous, so much as he was fidgety. “Well, maybe it was some of that, too,” he joked. 

Remus snorted, rolling onto his side and catching one of Patton’s hands in his own. He held it, playing with Patton’s fingers like he was trying to focus. 

“Hey,” he sighed, heavy, “Sorry.”

“Huh? What for?”

“C’mon, you know,” Remus gestured around with his free hand, “All the jokes, and all the times I hit on you, like, graphically. I was kidding, obviously, it was just that you always had the best reactions. If I’d known why, I mean. I don’t know if I’d have actually stopped, but whatever. Different time, different me. I’m stopping now, kay?”

Patton’s eyes went wide. He hadn’t- He wasn’t trying to make Remus stop, that wasn’t fair. He knew how important staying true to himself was to Remus, and if he’d actually managed to guilt-trip any of that away, he didn’t think he’d forgive himself.

“Oh, it’s really okay, I mean- I know you like talking about stuff like that, who am I to say you shouldn’t?”

“You never said that, actually.”

Patton nodded, even if Remus couldn’t see him, and even if he was pretty sure they were on different pages. “Exactly. You shouldn’t go changing just to make me comfortable, I’ll get used to the jokes! I guess I just wanted to know that they were, which, obviously yeah, but… um, I’m bad with knowing what tone is which, sometimes, so-”

“Ugh, Patton,” Remus was laughing, leaning up and grasping tighter around Patton’s hand, with a tone that said plainly: please shut up. Patton did, biting the inside of his cheek. “Look,” Remus huffed, “I know what you’re trying to say, and it’s real sweet that you’re so worried about this, but it’s not exactly like I’m telling you that I’m reinventing myself. I’ll definitely keep saying plenty of horny shit, trust me, I can just drop it with the comments about ya. It wouldn’t even be funny anymore; fucking with people is cool, right, but making someone I actually like feel ‘icky’, or whatever, isn’t really the same thing. It’s no big sacrifice trying to make you feel safer with me, got it?”

Remus’ eyes were on his, glowing with concern. Patton felt his face flush for an entirely new reason, nothing to do with embarrassment.

“You want to make me feel safe?” Patton grinned, just this side of giddy. “That’s a new one.”

Remus made a vague grumbly sound; it shouldn’t have been as cute as it was. “Yeah, okay, so what if I do?”

“It’s okay if you do. It’s sweet.”

“Maybe it is. Besides, you aren’t the only aspec side around,” he shrugged, “I’m not too big on the dating side of things, myself.”

Patton’s smile widened. “Thank you. I mean, for understanding, and… getting me out of my own head about all this.”

“I gotcha,” a claw traced over Patton’s knuckles, idly, “No need for thanks.”

“I’ll give it anyway, you know that.”

Remus snorted. “Mhmmm.”

With the remains of embarrassment finally fading away, Patton yawned, and remembered just how tired he was. He laid himself down finally, relaxing as his back hit the mattress. No sooner after he’d done so, Remus was letting go of his hand in favor of curling around him and setting his head on Patton’s chest. 

Patton would be lying if he said it wasn’t a relief, feeling the other unhesitant to curl up against him still. He looped his own arms around the smaller figure, practically on top of him, and traced patterns against Remus’ back. 

In hindsight, Patton couldn’t remember ever falling asleep so easily. 

The morning after, there was a crisis. A Thomas-crisis, and an emotional one, which set Patton up for a busy, busy day (or morning-through-afternoon, but it was well more than enough work for one day). The one upside to the whole mess was that he didn’t have to deal with it alone, because emotional distress fell neatly into Virgil’s area of expertise as well as his own.

At some point, you’d think they’d get numb to the endless dilemmas every other day, but with each new outing it got clearer and clearer that panic was just a part of life. Most weeks had at least one incident; there would be a mistake at the post office that needed to be worked out in person (which Patton didn’t mind, really, but Virgil hated, and Roman thought was a waste of time), there was an event for a friend of a friend that for some reason they were socially obligated to go to (which no one liked but Roman, who always thought they were one person away from being ‘discovered’), or- the present situation- there were pre-established plans that all the sides had somehow forgotten about until they were shoved into it at the last second.

Patton jolted awake with a gasp, the urgency of his human throwing him out of sleep. It was a full two hours later than he usually woke up, something he would’ve loved to appreciate on any other day. His bed was already empty- the warmth of another person still there, the covers still scrunched, but empty- which did serve to make his morning routine quicker. He dressed with a fervor that he couldn’t even place, manic exhaustion already soaking into him and making plans to stay there all day. It was going to be a rough one, being around people. 

But, Patton knew it wouldn’t be hard to ignore all that, for a little bit at least. There was still a bright side, and that side was Virgil! Who he got to spend all day with! Working, sure, but still- work done with a loved one is never work at all.

“Yeah, I don’t know if that rings true, Pat,” was Virgil’s response to the sentiment, when Patton told him.

“You’re smiling,” Patton said, because he was.

“What?” Virgil covered his mouth, “No, I’m not- shut up.” 

“You believe me, I know you do. You looove me.”

“Says you,” his mouth may have been covered, but the crows feet under his eyes creased more. His shoulders were just a little less tense, too, enough to tell Patton he was right. 

That morning wasn’t great, but, they made it better.

Remus had woken up in a lot of places that were decisively not his bed. The floor? Sure. The imagination? Oh, absolutely. Underneath furniture, on top of furniture, and on counters- anywhere lie-down-able, been there and done that. Just for the fun of it, really, and a nice shock to whoever found him curled up in the sink or beneath cabinets. He was used to a crick in the neck or a splotch of red, rough carpet print on the side of the face. 

So he didn’t really know why, waking up in someone else’s bed, he jolted out of it so quick, he looked like he’d been electrocuted. Or why, after scrambling out of Patton’s arms with whatever carefulness he could manage, he bolted from the scene entirely.

Remus began the slow process of piecing it together after he all but slammed the door behind him, trembling and cursing his way down the hall. He dragged away from Patton’s room and let his back hit the wall, sliding to the floor with a kind of hysteria he could only describe as itchy-vomity-terrifying-amazing. 

He did itch at his skin, he was feeling a bit sick, a bit scared, but he thought he might’ve been grinning anyway, so the description fit well enough. Except, nothing was fitting actually well, right then.

The closeness. The attention. The fact that he’d spent eight hours of sleep getting a full dosage of both those things. The fact that it had been more of both of them than he could remember getting, ever. Of course he’d scrambled away- how else could he react!?

Remus didn’t get overwhelmed. Except, apparently he did! What another fun surprise!

A door creaked open down the hall (thank God not Patton’s). Remus felt the eyes on him, and looked up- manically, he looked well and truly manic.

Logan blinked at him. He looked a lot like an owl in the mornings, Remus noted. One of those smart ones, obviously, not one of the ones that fucks around counting licks on a lollipop. 

Logan cleared his throat. 

“Remus? Is everything alright?” 

Remus shrugged, grinning. “Maybe! Who knows, though, right? It’s a lot, you know?”

Logan did not know, and said as much. Remus only laughed, letting his head hit back against the wall in the process.

He still felt warm, inside and out, after all that cuddling. It was weird, good-weird, but still so new. And, like he said, a lot. He’d felt that kind of warmth before, but definitely not as much- and he knew he needed to distract himself before he went crazy. Or, before his rattrap of a brain ruined the maybe-possibly good feelings for him. 

“Hey, any chance you’re busy today?”

Logan hovered in his doorway for a minute before ultimately deciding to step out, probably determining the interaction as a prolonged one. He didn’t look too put-off about it, though.

“A very high chance,” he said, “But for now I am not. Is there something you need?”

“A distraction.”

“Ah.”

“So, you up for it?” Remus pulled himself up from the floor, popping a few joints. “At least for the morning, yeah, Geek?” 

“Of course,” he smirked, “Provided you can call me by actual name at least once in this conversation.” 

Remus grinned, probably coming off more relieved than he intended. “Eh, we’ll see about that one, Dweeb.”

Logan met him halfway down the hall, not looking at all surprised by the response. He looked, if anything, amused. Remus found himself remembering very abruptly that the two of them got along, were probably friends, and somehow that fact was still novel to him. Or maybe it was the mood. Probably both.

“Well, it was worth a try,” Logan reasoned.

“Oh, sure.”

“What were you thinking we should do, anyway?”

Remus raised his eyebrows suggestively.

“I’m afraid that’s off the table,” Logan told him.

“Aw, fine. Surprise me, then.”

“That will be hard.”

Remus laughed, unsteady and shrill.

“C’mon, I know you’ve got it in ya.” 

Logan smiled, just-nearly-almost mischievous. “Well. I’ll see what I can do.” 

And for just a second, some of the panic slipped away, leaving behind that strange warmth. 

Patton didn’t exactly let Janus know he was coming by. It had been a long day- or, a long five hour period between ten in the morning and three in the afternoon, but still, the idea that there was any day left at all made Patton want to melt into the nearest soft object and never get up. 

When Patton needed to melt, he went to Janus’. Maybe it was the big armchairs; maybe it was the comforting, gooey little white-lies that soaked the atmosphere of his room; maybe it was the fact that his voice was so very easy to fall asleep to. Most likely, at least part of it was because he always seemed to enjoy taking care of people, anyway. 

It was a nice combination, and exactly what was needed. Patton could apologize for not knocking later, ideally when he wasn’t falling asleep where he stood. 

“Janusss,” he groaned, by way of greeting, and promptly collapsed onto the nearest soft surface while the door swung shut behind him. 

Janus blinked at him from across the room, surprise lasting for approximately three seconds. He turned around, and sighed.

“Well, hello to you, too.”

Patton hummed, drearily.

“You look cheery,” Janus quipped, “Anything you’d like to talk about?” 

The question was spoken lightly, but not insincere. Patton lifted his head enough to smile tiredly at the snake. He shrugged, for the room was working it's magic already, as was the easy company to be found there. Stress was easing away, in small bits, evaporating into warm shimmers under his skin. He had no doubt that Janus was doing some of it on purpose, as soon as he’d noticed the mood Patton was in, giving him a blanket of speckled reassurances (which were, as Janus insisted to him time and time again, just a tiny, harmless breed of pleasant lies) in an almost-literal way. 

Most things about the sides’ rooms were like that. Almost-literal; concepts that crept their way into the physical world, if only slightly. Janus was the best at those kinds of things, though. 

“’S just been a tiring day, y’know?” 

Janus sat beside him, toying with some spare yellow strings, weaving and unweaving them almost carelessly. “I do.”

“A tiring night, too,” Patton added, an afterthought, but he found as he said so that it was true. Long in a good way. An impactful way. It felt like something important had happened, something that changed, but he didn't quite know what. It was still just as draining, though.

Janus raised an eyebrow, but he did not pry (even if he most likely wanted to).“So, you’ve come here.”

“Do you mind if I just rest in here for a bit?” He said, as he’d already gotten quite comfortable.

“Why don’t I do you one better?”

Patton hummed confusedly, but Janus had already begun urging him to sit up. The snake waved a hand, filling the room with light, swirling piano music. At once the air seemed to grow fuzzy, spicks and specks of what looked like golden glitter floating around- not unlike from the distortion Patton’s own room gave him when he was happy. Janus smiled down at him, summoning a neat little tea set on a tray and fixing them each a cup of the swirling, caramel-colored liquid. 

Patton sighed happily, taking the teacup he was proffered and thanking the lord for whatever he’d done to deserve a friend like Janus. 

Janus sat beside him, balancing the tea tray on an end table, and let their shoulders bump. He wasn’t a touchy person, exactly, but he allowed for a conservative amount of casual intimacy. Occasionally, and in an unspoken way, but still.

The atmosphere had exactly the intended effect. Patton felt paradisiacal. 

“Gosh, what would any of us do without you?” 

Janus hummed. “You’d most certainly perish.”

Patton laughed, his chest lighter already. 

Remus felt good for about ten seconds after leaving Logan’s room and letting the guy get to work, fresh off the good morning he’d had. Then, very promptly, the weight that the remaining hours of daylight carried dropped onto his shoulders, and he would’ve been perfectly willing to claw his brain out to get a moment of reprieve from the whole barrage of irrational terror worming around in it.

Remus didn’t know why it was so bad that day (well- he had a guess, but thinking about it obviously made it suck worse, so). What he did know was that he needed someone to keep fucking distracting him, and that someone could under no circumstances be Patton.

Luckily, avoiding him wasn’t hard- he was still busy, and Remus had a feeling he’d need a rest once Thomas’ crisis was over, anyway- but that didn’t do much to solve the other half of Remus’ problem.

He needed something big, loud, and most importantly, not solo. He needed someone that could take up a whole room just as easily as himself, with endless energy to bounce back and forth, back and forth, until neither of them would ever worry about anything other than the moment and whatever it was they would do together… 

Oh, god fucking dammit. 

Remus sunk out to the Imagination. No, not his. The opposite half.

He rose up into more than a blank canvas, but less than a finished work; a vibrant world with gaps and white spots. He might’ve taken the time to look around, but- unsurprisingly- his brother was in front of him, accosting him, immediately. Seriously, it was like he’d teleported. 

“What are you doing here?” Roman snapped, his hands, still splattered with ink, landing on his hips. 

“Aw, so now I’m not even allowed to visit my own flesh and blood, and other various parts?” 

Roman scrunched his nose up. “No, you aren’t allowed. This is my room!”

Remus- as he always did when someone said he couldn’t do something- cackled. 

“I’m serious!” Roman whined, “I’m busy!”

Now, he said that, but Remus knew from personal experience that if Roman wanted him gone, he could’ve forced him out without too much issue- or worse yet, attacked him outright. He didn’t seem to be about to spring, though, not looking any worse than annoyed, so Remus happily decided that this interaction fell into the normal-and-healthy-sibling-bickering category instead of the unfortunately familiar would-genuinely-commit-fratricide-if-possible category. 

He grinned. “Yeah, and I’m bored!”

“Not my problem, and you’re still in my room.” 

“What, worried I’ll gunk up all your magic ponies and Yellow Brick Roads, or whatever it is you like to play with around here?”

“Yes, I am!” Roman scowled, but it looked a lot like he was straining his jaw not to laugh. “And you know I don’t make those, you fiend, I made a unicorn once and that was only because Logan wanted one.”

“You’re shitting me if you say that you weren’t the kid who always wanted a pony, Ro.”

“Well, how’s a pony any better than a thestral, which I seem to remember someone getting all excited about when we first read the-books-that-shall-not-be-named?”

“Ooh! Good idea, we should abso-fucking-lutely make those!” Remus wandered past his brother, looking around at the half-finished scene that he’d walked in on. It was sunny, pleasant- all around very vanilla, but there was at least a sense of adventure thrumming under it that gave the place a kick. With some work, it could actually be, like, fun! “Ever see somebody die? Don’t worry, I can help with that.”

Roman turned to him, looking hilariously incredulous with what was happening.

“Um? Excuse me? This is my domain,” he blinked, and a smug smirk crossed his lips. “Which means that you don’t have the power to make anything here! So, ha!”

Oh, right. That made a lot of sense, actually. How had he forgotten that? It wasn’t like this was the first time he’d tried to make something with his brother, right? 

…Wow. That had no business hurting as much as it did.

“Uh- Remus?” 

His head snapped up, a smile with too-many teeth already strained across his face. Remus’ head was scattered enough, coming here wasn’t supposed to make it worse.

“Sure, okay- there’s gotta be some way for us to build stuff together!” 

Roman stared appraisingly at his sibling, apparently thinking before he argued for the one and only time in his life. He tilted his head in confusion, perhaps worry. 

“I- well-” Roman glanced at what he’d been making, and down at his hands. “I’m sure I could, perhaps, let you have power here. Just this once.” He huffed. “It’s my room, right? So there’s no reason why I couldn’t do that, if I wanted.”

“Do you?” 

“Ugh.” Roman rolled his eyes, perfunctorily. “Fine. I don’t know what’s up with you, but I’d rather you be your normal weird-self than… whatever this is,” Roman stuck his hand out, his chin raised like it was a challenge. “Good?”

Remus grabbed his hand (and did not buzzer him, or slime him, even though it would have been so easy- because they were having A Moment and even he could appreciate the sanctity of something like that). 

“Yeah,” he said. “We’re good.”

Roman, as it turned out, was able to tolerate Remus for a whopping six hours, right up until five p.m., and only shooed him away in order to finish the project that he’d more-or-less happily dropped when Remus stopped by. So Roman wasn’t the worst brother in the world, Remus acknowledged. He then resolved to never, under any circumstances, say that to Roman’s face. 

The door to the Imagination shut with a click. The sound matched almost perfectly with another, sharper one down the hall, what Remus recognized as Janus’ door closing. He glanced up with a grin, wondering if he could maybe get Snakey to distract him for a while- only to lock eyes with precisely what he needed distracting from.

Patton smiled at him. He looked tired, relaxed, and raised a hand in some semblance of a wave. It would probably be a great opportunity to unwind together, talk stuff out, and definitely curl into each other on the couch.

Remus wasn’t going to take that opportunity, though.

Remus stared back at Patton for all of three seconds, the grin sliding off his face, before barging through the nearest door and slamming it behind himself. 

Shit. Fuck. What the hell did he do that for? It was just Patton, Remus knew Patton; there was no reason to be jittery enough to bolt from him twice. There was no way Patton wouldn’t think he was mad- which he wasn’t, even if he barely understood why he was losing it, he knew it wasn’t anger. But Patton wouldn’t know that, and he’d cry, probably, and Remus wasn’t sure if he was good enough at comforting people to fix it after. Christ, maybe he couldn’t fix it, maybe he’d still be too keyed up to talk to Pat, even if he started bawling! 

“Hey? What the fuck?”

Remus spun around, and yeah, he could’ve guessed whose room he ended up in without the gravelly voice to give it away, given that little spiral. A surprised-looking Virgil stared up at him, sitting cross-legged on a spiderweb bedspread. 

Remus ignored the thin layer of anxiety still rolling under his skin (now that he could place it), and shrugged, sliding until he sat on the floor.

“Oh, hi,” he said.

“Yeah, hi to you too, but my question still stands:” Virgil clapped his hands together, “What. The fuck?” 

Remus considered a few possible snarky responses, but found that most of them were pretty pathetic. Besides, evading vulnerable situations was more of Janus’ thing, and Remus didn’t want to steal his bit. 

“I’m hiding like a little bitch, so don’t kick me out, or I’ll maul you.”

Virgil’s eyebrows went up, but the surprise in his face was being replaced, slowly, by confused resignation. “Okay, cool. Why here, and why me?”

“First door.”

“Yeah, that’s about my luck,” he blew his bangs out of his face, “So like, you’re not gonna go anywhere else?”

Remus thought about it, but it was an easy choice. If he was gonna whine to anybody about something like this, he decided, it’d probably be Virgil. Virgil was good with fear, he was good with Patton, and he was good at making fun of shit if a conversation got too serious. 

“Nah. Sorry, Emo Boy, but I’ve already annoyed Logan and my dipshit brother today. Looks like it’s your turn!”

“What about Janus?”

“Eh, he’s a live-in therapist for the rest of you already. I think I’ll give him the day off.”

Virgil rolled his eyes, sighing with all the exasperation of a teenage burnout and not a thirty-year-old metaphysical humanoid.

“Okay, okay- and why’s Patton off the table? He, like, actually enjoys helping people,” Virgil glanced down, scuffing the carpet with the side of his foot. “He’s good at it, too.”

“Yeahhhh,” Remus locked his teeth together, inhaled through them, “About that.”

“What, aren’t you two all close now?” Virgil frowned, “I fuckin’ saw you guys at the meeting yesterday, you were so on top of each other, I feel like I forgot that you were two separate sides,” to anybody who didn’t know him, the way he talked about it would sound harsh. Remus, however, knew exactly how soft Virgil really was- the fucking poser- and that that shit? That was pure encouragement, raw as a bloody, bloody steak. 

Which, of course, only made Remus wince again.

He flopped sideways onto the floor, groaning. “Yeah, we’re close. That’s- I think that might be the problem?” That sounded right, almost, but just wrong enough to feel icky and annoying. “Ugh, I don’t know. So I just ran!”

There was a beat.

“Wait a second,” Virgil’s voice was tight- oh that bitch, he was laughing! “You’re hiding from Patton?”

Remus huffed. Okay, so maybe it was a little funny, he could appreciate that- but! He was still upset about it!!

“I mean, what has he done to scare you off?” Virgil pressed, “Too many compliments? Did he hug you too hard? I know the dude can be a lot sometimes, but-”

“Okay, ok-ay,” Remus couldn’t help it, he managed a laugh at it, too. “It’s ridiculous! It’s fucking ridiculous and he’s not even the problem!”

“Then what is the problem?” Virgil was snickering, “And don’t say that it’s you, dude. At least one of us around here has to not hate himself to hell and back, and you’ve defended that title for too long to lose it,” he cleared his throat right after he said it, sitting up straighter and trying to look like he hadn’t just been laughing like a huge dork. “Not that I’m, like, worried about you or anything.”

“Aw, you so are,” Remus stared up at the ceiling, grinning despite the ache in his chest. “But no, it’s not that. He thinks I’m awesome and he’s right, so don’t worry.”

Virgil leaned over him, staring upside-down at Remus. He squinted.

“Hey, this a serious problem?”

“I guess so. You can joke about it, though.”

“Cool. Um,” Virgil pulled away. Remus sat up, watching the trait cross one leg over the other, flip them, then tap his knee one-two-three-etc. times. He chewed on his lip. The whole nine yards of a classic Focused-Virgil Face. “Okay. You can tell me about it, seriously. I’ll try to help, or whatever.”

Remus blinked at him.

“Don’t- Jesus- don’t make a big deal out of it, dude-”

“Oh, I am.”

“I don’t even have a choice, okay, you’re the one who-”

“You’re so sweet, Virgey!”

“Remus, I swear to God, repeat that to anyone and I…” 

Virgil trailed off. Remus pouted at him, dramatically, his eyes practically glowing with mischief. “C’mon, aren’t you going to threaten me?”

“I was, and then I remembered that you’re like, actually into that kinda stuff, so. No. Nope, I’m good.”

“Fine,” he shrugged, “Looks like you’re resigned to just hearing about my feelings, instead!”

Virgil rolled his eyes again- of course he did- but there was no hiding the way he went quiet, patient, you could even call it attentive.

It was an offering, one that Remus didn’t hesitate to take. 

Patton left Janus’ room in a good mood.

He was in a considerably less good mood when, as soon as he’d left, Remus saw him and scrambled away like Patton was about to attack him where he stood- wide-eyed with fear and everything.

Patton swayed in the hallway for seconds after, uncertain about a lot of things suddenly. 

The room Remus had run into had definitely been Virgil’s, not his own, and for a moment Patton entertained the idea of just going up to knock. He dropped that thought quick, realizing that if he really wasn’t wanted, then he definitely didn’t want to confirm that he wasn’t wanted.

He might have gone back to Janus- Janus was smart, Janus knew how to explain things and solve problems and comfort people- but that was scrapped, too. He’d taken up plenty of the snake’s time already, firstly, and secondly… No, yeah, Patton already knew just who he needed to see for something like this. 

Logan set aside his laptop as soon as Patton walked into the common room, a surprisingly perceptive gesture for someone who claimed to be bad with feelings. Or maybe Patton had just gotten rusty at hiding them.

“Hi,” he greeted, wobbly.

“Hello,” Logan said, “You look upset.”

Patton stared at the wall just above his friend’s head, and nodded.

“Can I help?”

He paused. It was a bad habit- one of many!- but feeling unwanted by one side made him wonder if, maybe, he was unwanted by everyone. The thought formed a lump in his throat and had guilt pooling in his gut, but this was Logan. His best friend, the person he had gone to because he always knew just where he stood with him. If Logan didn’t want to help- no, because he always wanted to- if he couldn’t handle helping, then he would tell Patton that. He always did.

“I think Remus is upset with me,” Patton blurted it out quickly, just so he didn’t have to hear them. Logan vanished his laptop at once, gesturing to the spot beside him on the sofa. Patton sat with him, smiling feebly.

“Has he said anything of the sort?”

“No,” Patton picked at the sleeve of his sweater, “He didn’t really have to. He kind of… ran away from me?”

Logan’s eyes widened behind his frames, almost imperceptibly. “I see.”

“I don’t even know what I did,” Patton flushed with the admission, because of just how true it was. He had no idea what he did, and still he felt blame settling over him like a well worn blanket, and all that he could do was hope it wasn’t as bad as the last time. “I feel like I should know this stuff by now, shouldn’t I?”

There was a pause, as Logan processed the words carefully, seemed to turn them over in his head. 

“Be careful not to jump to conclusions, Patton. He typically freely expresses how he is feeling at any given time, so even if his actions seem to say otherwise, it’s entirely possible that he’s not upset with you,” Logan smiled reassuringly. “I find that most of his actions are meaningless. He’s a very weird creature.”

Patton managed to laugh at that. Logan leaned their shoulders together, a little pride flashing in his eyes, as he continued. “He did seem to be ‘out of it’, in a manner of speaking, when we spoke earlier today. It would make sense if that had worsened over the past few hours, and now he’s just particularly flighty. All in all, I wouldn’t read too much into it, if I were you.”

Patton nodded, resolutely not mentioning that they’d spent the night together, however relevant that was. He knew it would sound paranoid to imply that their intimacy had backfired, or come too quick- because Patton was paranoid, and certainly a little neurotic, and the less he voiced it the better. 

Instead, he followed the advice he didn’t believe, and let himself rest against his friend. Logan had laced their fingers together; it wasn’t as comforting as it usually was. 

Logan was only so touchy when it was for the sake of others, and almost always that ‘other’ was Patton. A fact that made the needy trait feel amazingly special most of the time, but on nights like that… More than anything, he felt greedy.

“I’ll ask him about it,” Patton promised, because he knew that was what Logan would suggest (even if the idea made him more than a little dreadfilled). “Maybe I overwhelmed him. He’s been cuddly, so I thought…” Patton shook his head, bile hitting the back of his throat as the realization collapsed upon him. “That’s probably it. I must have took it too far.”

Logan didn’t pry, but Patton could feel his concern mount just as well as he could see the frown on his face.

“Talking to him will be the best course of action,” he said plainly. “For the time being, though,” he released Patton’s hand, wrapping his arm loosely around Patton’s waist and leaving it there. “It might be beneficial for you to receive more reassurance. Is this alright?”

“Yes,” Patton ducked his head, knowing full well how obviously relieved he sounded, “Thank you.”

“There’s no need to thank me, I’m happy to help,” Logan told him, and he had no doubt that it was true. Still, it always surprised him anyway- and that at least was a good thing about a friend who was so reserved. The pleasant surprises.

Patton sat up enough to rest his head on top of Logan’s, a position that was almost but not quite cuddling.

“I sincerely hope,” Logan muttered, “That everything will be alright for you.”

Whether he was speaking only about the Remus situation or not was unclear.

“Me too.”

“If it’s any consolation, it’s very difficult to stay upset with you, if he truly is so. In my experience, at least.”

Patton sighed. “Thanks, buddy.”

“Of course. Your happiness is-... you, are very important to me, and I can only hope that you’ve made a friend that values you as much as I do.”

Patton knew what he meant by it. Both he and Logan were acutely aware of how different they were, and how little they matched with each other. Patton couldn’t understand him- not wanting to be showered in love, enjoying silence and a little bit of alone time, needing space. He knew that Logan didn’t get him, either- didn’t know why he cried all the time, or why nothing ever seemed to fix him for good, or why he said so many things that went without saying. They still struggled with each other’s languages, sometimes, but they’d gotten miles and miles better with it over the years. Sometimes Patton thought that the only way they’d become so close was sheer willpower, pushing past each misunderstanding and argument just because they liked the challenge of it. Determination was always a common thread between them, whatever differences they had.

They had to have boundaries, then. Logan might not hold Patton on his worst days, but he’d give him notes and gifts and bring him water, food, things that he neglected for himself. Patton didn’t have any of the right words to talk Logan down when things got bad, but he was always there to cheer him back up when he was ready again. Neither of them understood each other, and maybe they never would, but they cared. Even if they couldn’t be what the other needed, they cared, and that was all they had to do. 

So even if Logan couldn’t fix things, Patton thought, he still did a hell of a good job patching them up. 

“Hey. Hey!”

Patton turned around with a jolt, his fingers going tight in the blanket about his shoulders. How long he’d been downstairs, he didn’t know- but he knew that he was really, very tired, and now was left blinking and confused at the person accosting him with so much energy. 

“Um, hi,” Patton tried.

Remus had run up to him at once, and was just as suddenly seizing both of his hands. Patton might have taken a moment to appreciate the touch, but with just one sentence that positivity crumbled:

“I need to talk to you.”

Patton shoved a plastic smile onto his face. He always felt a little icky to be faking it, but with Remus, the shame was especially thick. Still, it was only instinct. 

“Okay.”

Patton opened the door; the Duke marched in without waiting for invitation, and he followed. 

Dread dripped down his spine like melting ice cubes. This is fine, Patton told himself firmly, once they were both sitting feet apart on the bed. He refused to think too hard about what the distance meant- if it meant anything at all, or if he was only being ridiculous.

“Sorry about today,” Remus began, “Really. I was freaking out for the stupidest fucking reason. You’ll laugh when I tell you!”

Patton didn’t laugh, but he smiled a little more wholly. If Remus was upset with him, the apology must’ve meant at least some of that had faded away. Probably.

“It’s okay, Mess,” the nickname rolled off his tongue easily. Remus grinned at him, but it was somehow more manic than usual.

“I probably got you all worried over nothing, bolting on you before you could wake up- and then again earlier, right?”

There was a pause, as Patton tried to decide if the question was rhetoric or not. When the silence stretched on uncomfortably, he found himself nodding. 

Remus huffed out a breath, rocking back and staring up at the ceiling. “Yeah, I- I’m still working at the whole self-improvement thing, ya know? That probably doesn’t make it better, but- I’ve never really had a reason to try and be, uh, considerate. Janus never really cared if I was a bitch, and nobody else ever mattered, and that- yeah, that’s kind of what I wanted to talk about.” 

His voice was raspy, low and thick in a way that it almost never was. Patton tipped his head to the side, confused. Remus looked- and sounded- awkward, an expression that was not at home on his face. 

“Wait, um- so it wasn’t anything I did? You’re not upset with me?”

Remus looked at him like he was crazy (ironic, that).

“Upset with you?” He crowed, “Why the fuck would I be upset with you?”

Patton flushed; he laughed embarrassedly, or maybe in relief; he toyed with the sleeves of his sweater.

“I didn’t really- I don’t know, but I was worried that I’d, um, overstepped some boundaries last night, and maybe made you uncomfortable.”

He was only kind of looking at his friend, from out the corners of his eyes. It was still easy to see the way Remus went from confused to amused, and then burst into cackles.

“You- You- Me? Morey, please, it takes a lot to make me uncomfortable- if that’s even possible, actually- and you sure as shit haven’t figured out how to pull it off yet. Sugar, I asked to stay with you!”

The relief flooded Patton all in a rush, and he felt himself finally relax. With Remus laughing and joking and being his usual (sweet, impressively sweet, surprisingly so) self again, it all started seeming a little silly. Remus must’ve seen him coming untense, folding down the same way accordion-pressed paper sprawled out when it was released from a bored student’s hand, because his gaze went warm, like something had finally clicked into place in his head. A problem solved, and what a wonderful solution it had come to- that’s what the look said. 

Patton met the smile just as brightly when the Duke shifted over some of the distance between them, taking up both of Morality’s hands in his own yet again. 

“Well, since it wasn’t something I did,” Patton said, “Then what was the actual problem?”

Remus didn’t look too upset at the question, but he was glancing down, up, sideways- his pupils flitted around the room without really touching on anything for too long; it wasn’t often that he was so obviously thinking something through. His fingers flexed, face a little pink, and he hesitated before answering:

“Okay, it’s like I said, right? I don’t- I’ve never needed to try to be anything for anybody before. I mean that I never wanted to do things in a conform-y way, obviously, but, I never wanted to be considerate, either,” he smirked down at their tangled hands, shrugging. “I don’t think I’m doing too bad for a first try, to be honest- but that’s not the point, the point is- this is… new.”

Patton opened his mouth, reassurances rushing to the tip of his tongue before he was hastily shushed.

“No, look, there’s a difference between being a pushover and just being fucking nice to the people you care about. That’s the problem- or I thought it was a problem, in my dipshit lizard-panic brain this morning- right? I’ve never wanted to do anything for people, because I didn’t need them anyway. I figured I didn’t, I guess, cuz I could survive without ‘em- it wasn’t like I had a choice, but I got on fine. Not to be too… I don’t know, pathetic? Who cares, but- I never knew anything different.”

Patton’s eyes went wide and watery, like the blue of his irises were soaking into everything else and leaking, leaking, leaking. He was squeezing Remus’ hands a little too tight, certainly, and he just wanted to hug him so bad- but despite his words, Remus didn’t even seem to need it. He looked back at Patton, huffed a sigh, looking just plain amused.

“So this hit me when I was talking to Virgil, about ten minutes ago,” he started, “That I woke up today, with you, and I had this thought like… Fuck, I don’t ever wanna move again. I could starve and then start to decompose and probably rot into bloody mush, but I’d probably still be perfectly happy- which is weird, because starvation is easily one of the boringest ways to die, I could go out so much cooler- but, it was more the fact that I was with you, and uh. So, so I thought that- which is so dumb and sappy- and it surprised me so bad that I just ran. And after I had, I was so freaked out, I didn’t even remember why for!”

He took a deep breath, something that he hadn’t done for that entire ramble. Patton got the sense he still wasn’t finished though, and waited patiently.

“I never needed anybody caring about me for me to be okay- the screaming and the fleeing and all that was fine, it was still a reaction. But I think I just realized that I couldn’t go back to that, now.

“Because of you. I knew I liked you, but it never clicked that things would probably suck without you by this point. More than that, I guess- it hit me that just because I can take care of myself, it doesn’t mean that it doesn’t fucking blow. That I don’t- I don’t want to be so independent again, okay? That I don’t wanna be alone anymore.”

And he couldn’t help it at all; Patton did hug him, then. He pulled him against his chest as soon as he noticed the words going choppy, choked, and halting. He let go of Remus’ hands, in favor of tangling his fingers in the Duke’s hair and carding through it.

Remus met the embrace with just as much fervor, curling up into the bigger trait. Yet somehow, he wasn’t crying yet.

“Hey, hey, I’m alright,” he murmured, “I mean, don’t let go, obviously- but I’m okay. I had all day to panic! Which I definitely did, by the way, because my whole worldview got screwed over. Finally know how you feel, I guess,” He was joking, Patton could hear his smile. He laughed. “But I got it out of my system, and ya know what I realized after that?”

Patton hummed attentively, letting Remus pull back just enough to see his face.

“I said, ‘okay, I’m processing that, and it doesn’t matter.’ It doesn’t matter because I only realized that maybe I need people once I already had them, and- no offense- but you don’t really seem like the abandoning type. The opposite, that’s what you are.”

Patton beamed. 

“Of course not,” he swore, pressing the words out as though intensity alone could make them more true, more pure. “Never, not ever.”

“Good,” Remus said, “Cuz I’m hanging on to ya, Pat. As long as I can.”

Chapter Eight

Taglist: @shrimp-crockpot @glitter-skeleton-uwu @donnieluvsthings @intruxiety @thefivecalls @did-he-just-hiss-at-me @gayformlessblob 

[daughterofhel]

.

My icon died last night.

The little black and white cat, Auk (or-ick). A silly name from a badly remembered name from my childhood.

He was pretty much deaf; car got him.

I haven’t seen him since I left Texas, as I moved for a year to VA before finally moving to be with my wife in Vento. One of my guy friends family took him in on their ranch.

It was fitting; I did get Auk from a ranch. He was used to it, loved it even. And this was without the competition of an unhealthy amount of breeding stays like the ones I grabbed him and Ivy up from. I could only take two, my friend the same.

Funny. I had originally gone there to see the birth of a colt only to leave with a cat. Return the next day and get one more, a friend for my tiny runt of a thing.

And who should but all demand it be him to leave with me but Auk? The friendliest of cats that I’ve ever had the pleasure to be around. He also thwarted my attempts at having two girl cats. He was insistent to leave with me and you don’t argue when you’re chosen you know?

I won’t detail the tears following or the rough road and chaos that went on, but many double shifts back to back to back endlessly, a medicated clumsy grandmother with rapidly failing health, and complex roommate situations, I just wasn’t able to provide the needed time and care for my cats.

I cried the entire 45 minute drive to my buddys property when he said he could take them in. I had to pull over twice. They also cried the entire time, being afraid of the car, which made it harder. My buddy, He was the same guy who rescued a big pup clearly abandoned some years back. I had helped train him to not jump on people and other stuff. His folks also owned a longhorn ranch, lots and lots of space.

Those cats deserved better and this was a familiar element, now neutered, vaccinated, and with no stray competition and the dog was so careful. But god. I never wanted to say goodbye to my cats. It didn’t matter though, what I wanted; they needed care and time I wasn’t able to keep providing.

So I dropped them off. As expected, Ivy kept close but never got too close to the family. She simply doesn’t trust; I’ve no idea why such a little thing bonded instantly with me and remained quite the fixed cuddle bug. But she had. I felt worse about it with her than Auk if I’m to be honest.

Auk loved attention. Loved fetch. Belly rubs. This cat was a classic dog and a huge whore for attention. XD He essentially made himself at home and lavished any and all attention, to which my buddies mother instantly fell for this fuzzy dorks charms. He has been well cared for.

I know younger me could’ve and should’ve done better when I got these cats. Mind you, I’ve been gone for over 10 years now, so it has been quite some time. I’m doing what I wish I could have done for my cats then with the two rescues we got last year here.

I was young and working so many hours for nearly no profit after stuff was paid, even living at home and with roommates. I couldn’t afford the extra vet fees I needed or the fanciest of foods or any of that. I loved them, and I felt them being with me instead of the half starving state they were in from constantly competing with so many other cats, was still a better option for them. I still was at least able to do some of the important visits for them.

I cleared their fleas and earmites. I never did get rid of Ivys worms, though I desperately tried. I tried so many ways to get this pill into that cat. Even crushed into wet food. Friends helping to wrap and hold her to make her swallow. All the tricks we found, failed. She just. She wouldn’t take it. And I didn’t have the cash to go every single day and time she needed a dose to a pet clinic. I had checked more than once. It was so much money.

Older, better situated now.. I’ve been able to do right by the cats, Nyx and Tivali, that I have now.

We even saved Nyx’s eye. We have a system to give her her seizure medicine every 12 hours. They’re both fully up to date with their shots and are fixed. Ears totally clean. Monthly newly added anti flea tick collars.

The best food we can reasonably find at the local pet shop; their pelts are beautiful, soft, shiny, and they never smell.

We’ve even found a biodegradable corn based litter we can flush which has been the greatest find.

We get semi regular check ups on our girls and they’re doing just fine now. I’m still proud about saving Nyx’s eye. It was a tedious ordeal. 3-4 times a day we had to clean and medicate a cats eye. We got good at it even if she wasn’t fond of it. Thankfully the vitamins they required were like treats. Even the antibiotics from the colds they had from the shelter.

I miss Auk. And Ivy. And I wish I could’ve not only given them the life I’ve given my current cats now, (I’ve constructed basket beds, hammocks, a whole canopy jungle gym and rope bridge to boot for them with my wife!), but I wish I could have been the one to have them in my life still. I know it was not possible. It wouldn’t have been possible.

But I think of them. A lot. And I knew it was inevitable. Auk would’ve been well over 13 or so years by now. A little old but could’ve lived longer yet for sure. My buddy didn’t mention he has gone deaf. Of course he rarely goes home himself; I don’t blame him. Life’s complicated.

I have mourned these two cats multiple times now. So I’m not thrown into tears upon this news, I’ve cried plenty over the years already. But I’m still sad to hear that fuzzy delight has passed on. I won’t ask, but I hope, and believe, the accident was a quick end for such a friendly guy.

I’ll mourn him eventually in full. I know I will. But considering this is the fourth major bad news I’ve gotten in less than a month and most of it a week, I thought to write about it. If only to keep sane.

May I not receive the same news of my grandmother or my sister who both remain in the hospital.

And god. May my mother stop forcing me to recall and talk about our shared trauma under my father and just keep me up to date on my families health. I don’t want to be crushed under this suffocating vice on my neck that makes me hesitate to call and see my family. I know she needs to vent. And god. I try to let her. I do. I try to be kind; she needs it.

But it isn’t the time and place when I’m trying to figure out if my grandmother is dying or getting better. I shouldn’t have to receive that confirmation, be granted a brief video called hello and check in, with the price of an hour long dredge through a past I personally have gone to two different types of therapy through to try and cope with. Which, only to some degree, have helped.

One of the last longer calls we had she all but said she hoped her theories on my father possible molesting me were true, so, you know, that would be one more trauma we had in common. She went on and on, even trying to provide loose evidence to her theory. Troubling sentences I would say in my rare visits. Etc. She just. Wouldn’t. Stop. And that was after an hour of recalling how terrible her life was with my father and the abuse, the screaming, the terror, the hiding, the injuries, all of it. As if I wasn’t left to live my life with this very man she said her three years with ruined her more than all her past shit combined.

She assured me she was a good mother who tried. And honestly. No. But I do believe she tried. But she was already weak emotionally and mentally and my father wrecked what was left. She left me sometimes for a couple days lock in that house when I was in diapers. You don’t forget that shit. I’m still scared of the dark. I can’t reason with myself on it. But being mad about all of it doesn’t change anything and would hurt a woman already broken. Why would I do that.

Still. It bothers me. So fucking much. But she’s such a fragile person in a fragile emotional state with everything else on top. She’s been heavily depressed for many many years and it’s a bunch of other stuff that spirals and honestly, at this point, she’s toxic even to herself. I’ve tried working on it with her but it matters not if she’s not willing to work on it too. I don’t know my mother besides her many traumas. We’ve been separated and estranged for most of my life. Unless I was physically able to actually be there and provide a use.

But that’s par for the course; no one will have you around if you’re unable to provide something for it. My wife’s the first person who genuinely seems to enjoy having me around just because and wants nothing more. I do stuff of course; but with her I am not afraid a slip up could mean everything it taken away and lost. I can forget the dishes once or had a bad mental health day and stay in bed without it having catastrophic consequences. She’s such a wonderful kind woman; I cannot help stressing over how to repay her.

I try and I’ve expressed my distraught on the topic and though she always seems baffled and confused about my insistence that I should be doing far more, that lass doesn’t agree at all. It’s her parents home so I am not able to freely run the house as I would on our own, as I’m able and have in many places, so I’m often less useful with the restrictions. She’s also use to the flow and swing of things and has things half done before it’s being asked.

Our own place will make life smoother and calmer for both of us; most importantly her. I’ve watched this family, sweet, but absolutely tone deaf to how many and often their demands are tossed to her. All the other kids moved out with partners. Hell, the oldest s child basically lives here. Our own hurdle with raising a kid who we don’t have the final say on any single thing. His grandparents are enablers cuz they don’t want to hear any loud noises, no matter what. And that causes strain when the kid can and does get anything and everything as long as he kicks up a fit. And he sure as hell does. There are days it’s so bad my wife’s in tears. And that pisses me off. The kids a good person, but the fact no one will actually parent and draw definite lines and be firm with No’s can also make him horrible too.

I’ve to deal with the chess match that is my father. I often call him my own personal Devil. He kind of is. But one I’m familiar enough with at this point in my life. I know where and when to cut my losses, where to step around, when I need to swallow my pride or the easily seen through lies, and nod my head. If he was all terrible, I could have cut him from my life. But no one ever really is. And I do know I owe it to the man; he has helped tremendously in my life as much as he’s been a big problem of it. I know his biggest fear is to be alone and forgotten. I wouldn’t do that, not even to the devil.

I need some bland news. Not thrilling. Not depressing. Just some ‘hey that happened’ ‘oh cool.’ Kind of news. Just a small reprieve.

Im. Scared. Of what’s next.

I. Know that things are teetering dangerously into a very very tragic terrible story on my mothers end. I know her husbands already super suicidal. My half brothers severely autistic, non verbal, among a few other things and will require his whole life to have someone be there for him. He’s not stupid, and I hate when people treat him as so, but he is absolutely unable to care for himself. He doesn’t have the right motorskills even, though we’ve gone to many different places to try and help him find ways to do actions in his own way that still get the same result. I admire how he’s such a positive little man, generally not just happy, but delighted. I aspire to look at the world like he does. He reminds me to try. I do love that about him.

He is, however, a Big boy, 15 now, and growing. He’s also very strong now. My mother is getting to an age where his, as well call em happy slaps, are really hurting her. He is generally good about slapping your hands and not your back if you provide them. But when he is upset he is a shover; one bad fall could really cause a lot of chaos for my mother with her health. The husband spends most of his time locked in his room.

My half sister is epileptic. They have done tests for years and can’t figure out all her triggers or the whys. They just sometimes stop for a long time then suddenly happen. She’s 16, turning 17 soon. And I don’t even know if she’s going to be, since my mother won’t let me know. And there are large gaps from my sister being on tech due to concerns of what triggered her seizure this time so she’s often removed from electronic devices for a time.

When I had turned 21, my mother and her husband tried to have me sign a paper to become legal guardian of my half siblings, should something happen to them, so the kids didn’t get separated.

At that time, I was still taking care of my fathers mother along with working at a shit job, and had a house full of temporary roommates who I had offered rooms to as a sort of safe house for them. I have a knack for finding people from broken homes, what can I say? With the house my father and I built, we had space, so I used it. I was able to help the girls get out of toxic places, get on their feet, and move on. Not all of them always. But it did generally work out. One has a boyfriend who was growing worse to her on top of getting more and more into hard drugs while also she dealing with an abusive aunt who got worse once her mother died of cancer. So she was stuck with the terrible boyfriend. I had her stay with me as soon as I heard.

Another was complicated, but generally revolved around the alcoholic mother and the many, shady, men in and out of the house. The dangers of that alone were.. problematic without the friend also being suicidal and not taken seriously. I’ve stayed many times with her to just hang out, clean, cook, or even read a book cuz she just wanted to hear someone talking and such. You know? Until eventually I had her move in with me too.

Another’s mothers died of a cancer and dad an alcoholic; not abusive, he just became childlike and super forgetful. To a hurtful degree in his totally dependent state, whenever he was home. Plus their whole little trailer smelled of piss. And her boyfriend (they’re married with kids and happy now) was in jail. He had a bad past but had cleaned up his act quite well, but. Well that’s complicated. We all know that the police don’t squint at details of any issue if the accused has a problematic past.

I had two different girls with trouble at home who were being used by their family to constantly work, clean, and pay for everything.

I had an ex and her girlfriend with problematic homophobic parents who were terrible and semi violent so I had them stay with us so they could be together somewhere safer.

I did not. At all. Have the assured means to also be a parent of ten children with very different needs nor any medical benefits to help out with.

I also knew, that, with how my mothers husband was, if he had some guarantees for his children’s safety, he would likely end his life if he could. He’s been so close so many times. If signed this paper, he would have the last big most important concern that’s kept him from.. I just. I didn’t want him to do it. I selfishly didn’t want to be responsible for my siblings that would take away any bit of time I had for myself away. If anything happened, I would not abandon and forget my siblings. That’s absurd. But my mother implied heavily she wanted to be sure of that. And thus this paper.

I was struggling to find aid for college so I could go to school (never got to, by the way. Minus two classes in total. Aced them both, but it doesn’t matter. Credits in the wind). I was already dealing with my grandmother. The girls I chose to help. My shit job. My fathers temper and his horrible horrible ‘on again off again’ girlfriend. The chaos that alone committed.

I was busy providing a safe space in my home and making sure it stayed that way for the rare times trouble makers made the mistake of stepping up to my door to try and harass my girls.

I often worked 10 days in a row before a day off. Many of those days often had double shifts which were 16 hours. Sometimes I got an hour nap on the double shifts.

I just couldn’t do it.

And now. I remember something that came to mind back then that comes back to mind now. My moms husband adores my grandma. She’s been better to him than his own mother. She’s dying. He’s not taking it well and his mental health has always been pretty low and in the last couple years, already dangerously rock bottom. I’ll admit, same.

His daughter is now in the hospital. My brother is smart but there are some things we can’t really explain for him to get. He understands something is wrong but not sure what and it upsets him. He doesn’t like change and gets super fussy for it. Which can be taxing and hours and days and weeks of it. Grandmas been in the hospital for a couple more or more now. She coded a few days ago but they got her back.

If grandma dies. If something happens to my sister…

God. I don’t see that man sticking around.

And with my mom isolated. A lot of it her doing with her own family but also a good part of it being dumb petty bs of other folks that have no reason to behave like that (a whole drama I don’t have the energy to keep up with..). I just.

I see it as a domino effect of terrible terrible events I don’t want to write.

My mothers side im not very close to. I don’t blame my cousins, we were kids ajd our meetings were brief as they were. But the adults kept their distance with me. No one expected me to survive and decided it was easier to not get attached. To not get involved with me, and by extension, the devil himself, my father. So I never got the chance to know that family. Even when I tried.

So the only family I do have some ties to ajd know, is in a hospital bed, or on my dads side, and they’re dying to. And I get it… that at a certain age in life, many of the people around you start to. It’s just life. Ajd it sucks. And I miss having a best friend. I miss having friends who just seem to like to have me around. Want to have me around.

And I wonder if the friends I thought I made with my roommates were just because I provided something for them. Sure we laughed a lot, we cried over shared traumas, celebrated holidays together so as to not be alone.

But not a one speaks to me now. And hey. That’s also life. But it makes me feel pretty shitty; every where I look in the past, I can’t see any relationship, family, partner, friendship, that ever had me around unless I was providing services they wanted and needed. And I don’t mean the natural give and take.

I’m aware that I’m not the friend folks have around. I’m a fun distraction at best and have been told and reminded as such. I feel like shit cuz my wife’s wonderful and the best person in my life, and yet I still mourn having close friends to hang with. I miss gaming together the most. Or the bullshitting. Sharing food.

I’m not a nice person. I’m working on it. I am. I’ve also, for years, been working on my own personal problems so as to not bring them into even conversations. I don’t know what I am doing wrong but I just.. can’t seem to keep anyone around. And frankly.

I find myself crying about it a lot with no idea what to do.

And. I’m burnt out.

I don’t want to make friends anymore. And yet I still crave it. Which sucks. I can’t stop seeming to want that. And I keep trying. And trying.

I’m trying to accept and be happy with any bit of time I get from the few friends who talk to me. I try to take my chances where I can to hang out (online, as they’re all distance by now), cuz I know it’s a short window and I’ll be lucky to get a next time in the near future.

Online is harder to provide a use, and once the ‘honeymoon phase’ of the friendship winds down, some drop off the map entirely. A few abruptly. And I just. That’s fucked me ho a ton. I can’t even express how many hours I stay sitting. Thinking. Unable to understand what I am not doing or what I am.

It’s a pity party. I know. But it’s fine. I’m still the only one at it and though I’m quite forward even with nerves eating away at me, I still just don’t know how to keep anyone in my life.

It’s taken almost 6 years for me to relax enough to believe my wife will, in fact, stick around.

But at this point in time, I’ve realized, on a note I just keep getting really sad over, that the bits of friendship I’ll get to experience with people, will be brief, snippets, and frankly, only if I am providing something they’re not getting.

I’m essentially the magazine next to the toilet when you have a bad bad stomach bug and your phones dead.

Man’s that’s.. probably my own doing. I know I’m a lot of woe is me in here. And it’s a post talking to me, so I’m indulging in it. I absolutely can’t out loud or in life. I’m working on just.. trying to feel instead of ignoring it. Per my therapists suggestions. So I feel fucking overwhelmed, sad, and alone. Isolated. Heavily.

Ignorance is bliss for real. I wish I wasn’t so aware that I was the friend you go to when all options are down and you’re bored. When you are in a bind and need a safe spot (I don’t mind that one but it does suck that it’s the only time some folks pop back in or up). That if I’m not working then no one even has a small little want to just say hi. I wish I had people who just wanted to say hi because they just.. missed me? I gues?

I wish I knew how to be better as a person and a friend. I thought I was making strides on that. I really had. And yet.

Here I am. Just.

Bitching to the void. Becuase my wife doesn’t need me to add more to her life with her father (finally back from the hospital after surgery) and his health concerned along with everyone else’s and the own sets of ordeals here. I don’t need her to fret over me.

She’s needed distraction and I’ve left her alone for a couple weeks now to her drawing. Probably one of the best things I did do for her was clean up a space for a literal drawing room for her. She’s happier for it. People compliment her art and she rather enjoys the well deserved attention.

I personally would love to have her around more. But I’m having a lot of bad shit days. Weeks at this point. And I’m using my energy to be useful in setting the table or doing the dishes, the cats, playing with the nephew, etc.

All I want to do is sleep.

Frankly. I’m tired of waking up.

But for her. I will.

[hopes4gf]

Thievery and Mischief (a marvel/ descendants crossover)

TW: (applies for series: discussions and mentions of rape, underaged sex, cheating, suicide, mental health)

AN: hi! this is a work in progress fanfic i’m uploading in advance of 15 chapters, so please show this some love, also sorry in advance for typos and spelling errors, my grammar is shit ;/ please enjoy!

I was so young. Too young. I didn’t understand why anything happened. I grew up in Agrabah with my parents and my brother, Aziz. But it wasn’t the dream vacation destination everyone in Auradon sought it out to be. It was a wreck. Jafar and Hades had invaded Agrabah and fought against my parents for revenge. Agrabah was damaged after their attack and our government had struggle to repair itself. So we had to live in a semi-permanent safe home for quite some time. By the way, I was also cursed by Jafar as a kid and I could shape shift into a tiger and develop other powers in the future. In my home, Mom was always stressed. Yelling and screaming how we needed to be better than they were to protect our city, especially me with my powers. My brother and I both took fencing classes, martial arts, learn how to shoot, every survival skill in the books before taking boys and girl Royal etiquette classes. Mom was the one who was particularly hard on me and my older brother throughout our childhood. Dad, not so much. He spent a lot of time in meetings in Auradon City. That’s how my first friendships began. He was great friends with King Adam and Queen Belle, elected leaders of Auradon. Ben, their only child was shy around me at first. He was intimidated by my mature stature. He like horses, painting, books, and food. I liked singing, fencing, and dancing but I also had a love for food and books so we got along through those things. We would always talk about the different ingredients in our cultures foods. His French pastries and my Arabian comfort foods. We were an inseparable pair of friends. And then I was introduced to Audrey. She joined our group soon after King Adam and Belle has decided to promise my parents and Audrey’s parents to a trust bond. A promise that would have one of us marry in the future. 9 year old me definitely didn’t want ANYTHING to do with dating my best friend. Neither did Ben. But Audrey, she was so persistent. She would constantly try to grab his attention. She was such a cheeky little girl. Raised to be such a lady compared to my more loose and carefree attitude. Somehow, Ben was happy around her. Our group soon expanded, and I met the greatest person ever. Li Lonnie, my greatest friend ever. Daughter of Fa Mulan and Li Shang, she was like me. Mature, strong, intelligent, and such a beautiful kid. Sure, she didn’t have my hazel eyes but she was such a pretty girl. She spoke so intelligently and when she spoke it was law. She was one of my inspirations as a kid. And still is :)

Time passed and we realized we weren’t kids anymore. My brother had to go away to a school in Auradon. And I was alone soon again. But I had my friends. But my child-like manners went away when I realized it was soon my turn to go to Auradon. So, I ran away. But you’ll hear more about that in the future.

Freshman year of high school. Audrey and Ben has broken off from our group and started dating in High School. Audrey has changed so much. She was such a sweet girl with a big heart but had begun to morph into a self-absorbed teen. Lonnie was still the same kind-hearted best friend. When I arrived in Auradon, I had a familiar face to help me. My cousin, Jordan. Daughter of the Genie. Everyone in that school was so nice that it hurt. My mother had raised me not to believe everything in front of me. But one particular thing or something changed that. A blonde boy with short curly hair and beautiful blue eyes had captured my attention. I still remember when our eyes had locked for the first time in the school courtyard. It was a whole new experience for me. I suddenly felt happy inside. Like a new found confidence in me was discovered. But my cousin Jordan advised me not to approach the boy. Chad Charming, son of Prince Charming and Cinderella. The most popular boy at Auradon Prep. Every girl would fawn over him endlessly. One day I had found a note from him on my lunch tray to meet him in the gardens. I swear we talked for hours about everything. We talked about our dreams, our experiences, our hopes. He made all my dreams happen. I wanted my first date to be at a carnival and he made that happen. I wanted something from the mall and he got it for me. I thought everything with him was just fine. Until that party. Ben had thrown a party for all his friends at Auradon Prep and Chad and I were there. Everyone was drinking except me. Imagine, prestigious kids of Royalty breaking illegal drinking laws. I didn’t know at the time but the punch was spiked heavily with Vodka. I never drank Vodka after that damn party. Jane, the headmistress, Fairy Godmother’s daughter had come to my dorm crying. She kept saying “I can’t take this anymore”. She had gave me the worst news of my life. She had seen Chad take me upstairs while I was drunk and touch me in explicit manners. Essentially, my boyfriend decided to rape me at my best friend’s party. I was sickened by that. And when my family pressed charges and got a restraining order on him, the case ended in a settlement. He didn’t even serve time. Because the judge was a family friend of the Charmings. I was devastated. I cried for weeks. I didn’t eat. I didn’t sleep. I just cried. Lonnie visited me every day while I was out of school. She had told me that Chad had moved on and was doing perfectly fine. I was miserable for all of Sophmore year.

By the way, my name is Adri Ababwa and I’m the world’s stupidest masterpiece. But you’ll see why later.

------------------------------------------------------------

“Adri,” My best friend, Ben called out.

My eyes widen, suddenly alarmed from my name being called.

“What’s up?” I say striding over to Ben’s side as he looks out the window of his parlor.

”I spoke with my parents about the proclamation,” Ben says.

I roll my eyes, realizing what’s about to happen.

”I told you your idea was stupid. Your dad would never let you bring Villain kids over-“

”They approved it,” Ben says, stopping me between my sentence.

My eyes widen in disbelief.

“Oh. Oh! I guess that’s good for you I guess,” I say nervously.

Ben takes both of my hands in his.

”Listen, I know things were rough for you last year, but this year we need change in this world. And I’m gonna be the one to establish that change,” Ben says.

”Even if that means bringing the daughters of Maleficent and the Evil Queen and the sons of Cruella de Vil and Jafar to Auradon Prep?” I ask nervously.

”What did I say about that?” Ben asks cheekily.

”They’re not their parents,” I reply in a mumble.

”Right,” Ben says, patting my shoulder. Ben opens his mouth to say something but hesitates.

”What?” I ask.

”That‘s why your going to be my advisor,” Ben says.

I take a step back.

”Your crazy but okay,” I giggle.

Ben chuckles softly and goes to the phone to ask his secretary if Audrey is on her way to the room for her Coronation fitting.

I walk through the door and wish Ben good luck.

As I stride down the hall, I hop onto my sticker filled skateboard and race down the halls. I greet the guards surrounding the castle and slide the down the handlebars of the stairs. I see Audrey and stop to walk the rest of the way.

”Adri! It’s a pleasure to see after so long. Out of your depression, I see,” Audrey says snarkily.

”Sure! I’m fine. And I see your makeup is looking as creased as ever,” I reply in the same fashion.

Audrey huffs and rolls her eyes.

I strut off.

”Fucking bitch,” I mutter to myself, hopping on my skateboard and skating back to my dorm.

As soon as I reach my dorm, Fairy Godmother is standing by my door.

“Can you please give me the board?” Fairy Godmother asks.

”Can’t have any fun around here, can I?” I ask, giving her my board for the fifth time this week

“Not for the first week of school. Remember we have-“

”Press coming in to report on the school, I know Jane told me,” I say at the same time as Fairy Godmother.

“Good. Then I’ll see you soon,” Fairy Godmother says dismissing herself.

I turn around and head for the courtyard where I spot Jordan under our gossip tree.

”What’s new, pinky-Lou?” I ask.

”Hey, cuz. Just doing some newspaper projects. I writing about the secret camera web series of our school and the new kids coming to the Isle,” Jordan says.

”Damn, news does travel fast,” I scoff.

”Ben posted an announcement a couple minutes ago,” Jordan says.

I roll my eyes in disbelief.

“What if one of them is cute? You gonna go for it?” Jordan asks cheekily.

”HELL NO. I am never making the same mistake of opening up to a person ever again,” I yell.

”It’s gonna happen...” Jordan says in a song-like manner.

”Shut the fuck up!” I say.

The night I sneak out of my dorm and go to the kitchens to get a snack for Roxie, my baby tiger.

”Insomnia?” A voice says behind me.

I’m startled by the voice and I turn to see Lonnie standing over the counter.

”Yes, you asshole,” I sigh.

Lonnie laughs silently.

”You know someone’s gonna find out that it’s you recording the videos at lunch,” I say.

”Stop it. That’s top secret,” Lonnie says.

”Who cares? Everyone knows that they’re asshole and dickheads anyways. And your very lucky that I haven’t ratted you out to Jordan. She’s persistent,” I say, grabbing some bacon from the fridge and putting it in a pan

”That’s for Roxie, right?” Lonnie asks.

”Maybe not,” I say.

Lonnie laughs and I take a piece of cooked bacon and put it in my mouth.

I hum softly at the taste.

”Hey. Don’t be afraid to talk to me sometimes. Especially after what I saw,” Lonnie says.

Ah. The thing. After some time in my self-quarantine of Sophmore year, I decided it was time for everything in my life to end. So, I grabbed some pills and I did something I regretted. Lonnie saved my life that day. That’s why I love her so much.

“I know, mama,” I say softly as I cook the rest of the bacon.

”You have no idea how much I care, Adri,” Lonnie says, hugging me from behind me.

”Thats probably why I love when you’re around,” I chuckle.

Lonnie lays her head on my shoulder.

”By the way I signed ya up for the welcoming comitee with Audrey,” Lonnie whispers.

”What!” I yell.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Two weeks later...

Someone starts banging heavily on my door. I open my eyes and the sound in my ears clears.

”ADRI! Wake up! Your late for the Vk’s welcoming,” Audrey screams from behind my door.

Maybe I should have stayed asleep. Damn you, Lonnie.

I put on this:

pin.it/5uiV7hV

And I walked out my door.

“Ben shouldn’t have made you his advisor if you were gonna sleep in,” Audrey says.

”I’m here aren’t I?” I reply.

”Shut up, let’s go,” Audrey says, grabbing my hand and dragging me down the stairs to the courtyard.

Oh god this is gonna be terrible.

Ben sees me and Audrey coming up next to him.

”What happened to you?” Ben asks.

”Slept in,” I mumble.

Ben chuckles and Audrey takes his arm.

”It’s fine by the way, it’s actually the first time in a while,” Ben says.

Fairy Godmother begins to greet everyone in the small group of band kids and cheerleaders until she reaches our trio.

”Ben, Audrey, Adri, how are you?” Fairy Godmother.

“Good,” We all say.

The limo pulls up and the band starts playing. The limo stops and two boys pop out fighting over a scarf.

My eyes glance towards to girls who come out of the other side of the car. One has short plum hair with a plum leather outfit to match. The other girl has long wavy blue hair with two crown braids at the front.

“Why do you want whatever this is?” One of the boys with gray hair says.

”Because you want it,” The other boy in a red beanie says.

Right off the bat you notice who’s who. And the boy in the beanie is definitely Jafar’s son.

“Leave it where you found it! And by that, just leave it.” Fairy Godmother says.

”Just cleaning up!” The boy with the red beanie says.

He puts the scarf back in the limo and his eyes immediately catch mine.

He catches me as I stare at his frame. His brown hair, his dark brown eyes, his muscular form and his leather outfit all catch me off guard.

His frown turns into a smirk and he strides towards me.

”Hello, foxy~ The name’s...Jay,” The boy introduces, attempting to flirt with me.

I laugh softly at his action.

”Your quite the catch aren’t you?” I remark with a smirk.

“Welcome to Auradon Prep,” Fairy Godmother says, stepping between us.

I whisper a little thank you to her and she nods.

”I’m Fairy Godmother, the headmistress,” She curtsies.

”As in, the Fairy Godmother? Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boo?” The girl with plum hair asks.

”Bibbidi-Bobbidi, you know it,” Fairy Godmother says.

“Does she ramble like this much?” I ask Ben.

”All the damn time,” Ben says.

We snicker in unison.

Audrey nudges Ben.

”It’s so nice to meet you all. I’m Ben,” Ben introduces.

”Prince Ben. Soon to be King, right Bennyboo?” Audrey interjects.

I fake-vomit at the nickname and roll my eyes.

”You had me at Prince. My mom’s a queen so that makes me a princess,” The blue haired girl says, fawning over Ben.

”The Evil Queen has no Royal status here and neither do you,” Audrey smiles cheekily.

”Yes she does, otherwise Snow White would cease to be Royalty and she is her step-sister,” I comment with a smile.

Audrey raises a brow to stop me and I wink in the girl’s direction. She gives me a smile in return.

”This is Audrey. My-“

”Girlfriend. And future queen,” Audrey says.

”Last but not least, this is Adri. My advisor and my best friend,” Ben says.

”Your new wickedly cool best friend,” I say with a smirk.

”These three are going to show you all around and I’ll see all tomorrow. The doors of wisdom are never shut! Except library hours are 8:00 to 11:00 and you know I have a thing for curfew,” Fairy Godmother says, excusing herself.

”She tends to drag things out of proportion. Don’t mind her,” I say.

Ben chuckles and Audrey nudges his arm.

“It is so, so, so good to finally me... meet you all,” Ben starts as Jay hits his chest with a light punch.

“ This is a momentous occasion, and one that I hope will go down in history... Is that chocolate?” Shaking the gray haired boy’s hand that is covered in chocolate.

”As the day our two peoples began to heal,” Ben finishes.

“Or the day where you showed four peoples where the bathrooms are,” The plum haired girl says.

“A little over the top?” Ben asks her.

”More than a little,” She says.

”So much for my first impression,” Ben says awkwardly.

“You're Maleficent's daughter, aren't you? Yeah, you know what? I totally do not blame you for your mother trying to kill my parents and stuff. Oh, my mom's Aurora. Sleeping...“ Audrey starts.

”Beauty! Yeah I’ve heard the name. You know, I totally do not blame your grandparents for not inviting my mother to their stupid christening,” The girl responds.

”Water under the bridge!” Audrey fakes.

”Totes!” The girl replys in the same tone.

They laugh together pathetically.

“Jeez, can we get this over with?“ I scoff.

” OK. So how about a tour, yeah?“ Ben starts.

We start to move towards the front of the school.

“Auradon Prep was originally built 300 years ago before my father turned it into a high school when he was elected King,” Ben says, clapping his fingers to morph the statue.

The gray haired boy jumps into Jay’s arms.

”Carlos, it’s okay. My father made the statue to remind us that anything is possible,” Ben addresses.

I laugh at the boy’s banter. Jay sees this and drops Carlos to the floor. I can feel him lurking by me as we continue inside the school.

“ So do you guys have magic here? You know, like wands and stuff?” Mal asks.

“All that stuffs pretty much retired. Most of us are just ordinary mortals,” Ben says.

”Unlike me. I was cursed so...” I say clicking my tongue.

”And you happen to be kings and queens?“

“That’s true. Our royal blood goes back hundreds and hundreds of years,“ Audrey says, placing an arm around Ben.

”Doug,” Ben calls Dopey’s son down.

“Doug, will be showing you to your dorms. If you have any questions-“

”Ask Adri or Doug,” Audrey says, whisking him away.

“Um, hey guys. Hi, guys. I'm Dopey's son. As in Dopey, Doc, Bashful, Happy, Grumpy, Sleepy, and... Heigh-ho.,” Doug starts, his eyes landing on the blue haired girl.

I take the clipboard from him and read their names.

”Mal Bertha. Evie Grimhilde. Carlos De Vil. Jay Farr,” I read to myself.

I interrupt Doug as he talks about classes.

”I’ll be showing you to your dorms,” I say, walking up one staircase.

”Guys, it’s actually this way,” Doug points towards me as the go in the wrong direction.

They follow me until we stop at their dorm rooms.

”Boys, you have the larger dorm here,” I point.

”Sweet!” Carlos says, hopping inside.

”What’s in it?” Jay asks, me

”Two full size beds, a flat screen tv, mini fridge, 3D printer, gaming console, a bathroom for two, fireplace, and double closet,” I say off the top of my head.

”Thank god, that’s enough to keep them busy for hours,” Mal says.

Me and the girls turn away from their room but someone places a hand on my shoulder.

”Hey, can we talk after?” Jay asks.

”Why?” I ask, raising a brow.

Jay gives me a pleading looks and I roll my eyes, walking away.

”Girls, this is your dorm. With roughly the same things as the boys except a bigger closet and bathroom and no gaming console,” I say.

”This room needs more-“

”Purple? I supposed you would agree. Love your outfit by the way,” I compliment.

”You don’t look to horrible yourself,” Mal smirks.

”I made it by the way,” Evie adds.

“Fashion Designer, huh? You could make some bank with that,” I comment.

Evie smiles.

”If you need anything, I’m the first door down the hall,” I say.

I close the door to the girls dorm and turn to see someone completely unexpected. My smile turns into a frown as I see Chad Charming at the end of the hall. As I try and stride down the hall to Jay and Carlos’s room, his gaze meets mine.

”Well, well. Look who it is. Little miss court case,” Chad says, his lips curving into a smirk.

”Your lucky my restraining order is expired, Charming,” I snark as he draws near to me.

”You know, you’re lucky Ben and Lonnie are friends with you. Otherwise, everyone here wouldn’t give a damn about your little charity case,” Chad says cockily, running a hand through my hair.

My body tenses and my teeth clench as he touches my hair.

“Don’t do that,” I say through my clenched jaw.

”Or what?” Chad says, pinning me against the wall. His frame towering over me.

”You gonna sue me again just so that I could give your pathetic ass more money?” Chad asks.

”Get your fucking hands off of her,” A voice says from behind Chad.

I look over Chad’s shoulder to see Jay standing behind him with a scowl on his face.

I can practically feel my eyes change shape, pleading to Jay to help me.

Chad gets off of me and walks towards Jay confronting him.

”Is that a threat?” Chad asks.

”You gonna punch me if it is, Princey? You know, you probably shouldn’t mess with someone you barely know. I’m sure it’ll have serious consequences,” Jay growls.

Chad backs off, intimidated by Jay.

”Whatever, man,” Chad scoffs, taming a step back.

He turns to me, his smirk returning.

”I’ll see you later, babe,” Chad says, winking at me.

He walks away and I can practically feel the tears coming to my eyes.

”Who the hell does he think he is?” Jay scoffs.

My legs start to move down the hall, trying to get away.

”Hey! Where are you going?” Jay calls behind me.

”Leave me alone!” I choke.

Jay’s footsteps chase after me and he grabs my wrist.

”Stay out of my business and leave me the hell alone,” I say in a serious tone.

”What was that about though? And why do you look like your about to cry in any second?” Jay asks deliberately.

I growl under my breath.

”Because he’s my abusive ex-boyfriend who raped me while I was blacked out at Ben’s party! And now everyone pities the hell out of me and treats me like a child because I tried to commit suicide. Is that what you’re so desperate to get out of me?” I yell.

Jay is taken aback by my words. His brown eyes widen as he looks at me. Searching through my eyes and seeing the pain in them.

”Shit, I’m so sorry. Look, I will never ever do that to you ever again,” Jay says, concerned by my action.

”Listen, don’t make promises you know you can’t keep,” I say.

Jay turns to leave but I grab his wrist.

”You forgot you tell me what you wanted to speak about,” I say with a smirk.

Jay scratches his neck nervously.

”Sorry. I was just so concerned about the way that guy was talking to you that I didn’t even realize,” Jay explains.

I chuckle lightly at his concern. How is he so chill after that? After I just yelled at him?

“I was just wondering if I could learn a little more about you. I mean-since we know a little bit about Ben and Audrey so,” Jay says.

I giggle lightly at his question. Then I hesitate, remembering this is the son of my parent’s enemy. But suddenly, my new found confidence tells me “Fuck it��.

”Well, I’ve lived in Auradon for 3 years. I like Art a lot. And um, I’m the daughter of Aladdin and Jasmine,” I say shyly.

Jay erupts in a light chuckle. My brows furrow at his actions.

”Did I say something wrong?” I ask.

”No, but that does explain everything,” Jay says with a smirk.

”Explain what exactly?” I ask, confused by his action.

”The comebacks, the way you roll your eyes, the outfit, and the way you act around danger. You have that “I really don’t give and shit sometimes attitude”. I’m assuming it’s family trait,” Jay laughs.

I roll my eyes at his banter.

”Sure, dipshit. And you know wanna know what gives you away?” I ask cheekily.

”What?” Jay says, playing along.

”The fact that you prance around me, eyeing me just like your father did to my mother when she was my age,” I say with a smirk.

His eyes widen, catching him off guard.

”And I promise you, your little concerned or flirtatious act isn’t gonna always cut it with me, pretty boy,” I say, tapping his shoulder and turning to leave.

I look behind me and see him smirk behind me as I walk to my dorm.

That boy is gonna keep trying to win me over. And I’m in for the long game...

[kookscrescent]

Baby Don’t Stop (m) │ myg

➤ pairing│Yoongi x female reader ➤ summary│Yoongi has had enough of your teasing for one night and he decides to pay you back by giving you a taste of your own medicine.  ➤ rating│NC-17, mature, 18+ ➤ genre│smut, boyfriend au, pwp ➤ warnings│instant smut under the cut!, soft dom Yoongi??, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it), oral (male receiving), slight rough sex, dirty talk, vulgar language, a little orgasm denial i guess, spanking cuz why not ➤ word count│2.3k│semi edited ➤ release date│October 2nd 2019 ➤ disclaimer│This is all fiction! Nothing mentioned/written are facts and/or real! So please just keep that in mind when reading and enjoy! Thank you ♡

⇥ Masterlist

“Shit, don’t stop!” Yoongi pants, the words sounding more like a jumbled mess than a coherent sentence.

He looks down, his glazed over eyes meeting yours as your mouth and hand works his hard cock. You speed up your movements, pumping him faster as you suck the tip of him between your lips, your tongue flicking against the head.

His entire face contorts in pure pleasure, his head crashing against the pillows and his hands at the back of your head trying to push your mouth back down on him.

You resist his push. Instead, you tease the crown of his cock some more, loving the way his face twists in pleasure especially when you pay close attention to the underside of the head with your tongue.

“Don’t play with me like that.” He warns you on a dark laugh.

He’s almost at his breaking point with the teasing. You can see it in his eyes – the way they have turned darker over the course of only minutes, the way his grip in your hair tightens and loosens every few seconds as if he’s trying to control himself, the way he clenches his jaw and the veins in his neck popping out.

You are doing it on purpose now, continue with your slow torture, drawing it out – trying to see how much more he’s willing to take before he finally snaps, and his dominant side takes over. You are keeping him right on the edge.

Above you he growls, a rumble coming from deep in his chest and his hands tighten in your hair to the point of almost being too painful.

Finally having enough of your slow teasing, Yoongi yanks you off him, his cock falling from your mouth with a wet pop and landing flat against his stomach.

Deviously, you smile up at him, but he doesn’t return your smile. Instead a smirk has planted itself on his lips, his jaw clenched and with one skilled maneuver he has you rolled around on your stomach, pinning you down to the mattress with your arms above your head. You can’t do anything but lay there and wait for what he has in store for you.  

His cock lays hard between your cheeks, the feeling of feeling him hot and wet against your own skin makes you squirm against the sheets.

His grip tightens around your wrists as he grounds his hips against your ass, his cock sliding against your cheeks. Your entire body heats up and you can’t focus on anything else than the burning desire inside of you, the need, the want for Yoongi to fuck you.

“Please,” you squeak when he doesn’t make a more to slide into you.

This is his payback. At the time, you got high off of teasing him, loving the way you could make him squirm and the control you had in that moment, but now you’re regretting it. A lot!

Bringing his lips down to the side of your neck, he bites lightly, planting small nibbles all the way up to your ear. “What do you want baby girl?” You tremble against him when his hot breath hits your skin, a moan filling the air.

“I want your cock!”

Grinding harder against you, he bites your earlobe. “Do you think you’ve deserved my cock?”

With the way his rugged voice hits the air and with the way his hard cock feels against you, you seem to have lost all ability to speak for the moment, and all you can do is nod vigorously in respond to his question.

Immediately he laughs. A deep rumble coming from his chest and he while supporting himself with the arm that has a hold on your hands, he brings the other one down between you to roughly grab one of your cheeks.

The move has his cock sliding further down, the tip just about teasing your dripping entrance but Yoongi pulls back, leaving you hanging.

“Beg.” One word. Beg.

At this point you don’t even care what you say, just flinging a bunch of word and sentences into the air, hoping it will get you closer to Yoongi filling you up.

“Please, please… fuck,” His hips continue their earlier ministrations, but slower and you momentarily lose what little train of thought you had left. “Please fuck me! I need your cock… please!”

Before the last word has even left your lips, Yoongi has slid all the way down to your wet opening, his cock slamming into you.

You cry out in both surprise and pleasure, your hands clawing into nothing but the thin air in Yoongi’s grip and you burrow your face in the sheets.

Yoongi withdraws from your soaking heat and slams forward. The tip of his cock reaches a place inside you that makes your toes curl and your walls clench. With what little room you have to move, you raise your hips back against him, doing your best to push back every time he pushes forward.

The feeling is almost too much – too intense, a hint of pain mixed with the pleasure from the way his cock reaches places inside you that you didn’t even know existed.  

You gasp trying to regain control over your breath, while Yoongi’s thrusts become harder and faster. The bedroom fills with the sound of skin slapping against skin, and behind you, you can hear and feel Yoongi’s deep pants as he lowers his forehead to your spine.

Just like you, he’s on the verge on coming apart, and he has to stop his movements for a few seconds, pulling out of you almost completely.

Your orgasm gets ripped from you and you whine in protest, trying to look over your shoulder, but with your hands above your head, it’s a difficult task.

“Yoongi!” You whine his name, your ass wiggling against him, trying to create friction.

He raises his head from your back and you prepare yourself for his cock to fill you up again. But it doesn’t come. Instead a head slap lands on your right ass cheek and you yelp at the shock of it.

“Behave.” He growls and spanks you, not once, but two times.

He releases his grip on your wrists and pulls out of you, and without wasting too much time, he has your knees bend under you and your ass in the air.

You lock eyes with him over your shoulder and you bite your lips to hold back the smile. His eyes are totally glazed over and dark. It’s a scary and dangerous look to anyone that doesn’t know him, but to you it turns you on beyond belief. It makes you wet in seconds and just from looking at him, you can feel a new pool of wetness tringle down the inside of your thigh.  

Yoongi sees it too and with his index finger, he gathers some of it on the tip, bringing it to his mouth and sucks. He looks up at the ceiling and hums around his finger, the taste of your arousal hitting his senses.

It must have snapped something inside him, because not even seconds after he’s pulled his finger from his mouth, his hands grasp your ass and he slams into you again.

The force almost sends you flying up the bed, but fortunately, Yoongi’s hold has your secured in place. Slowly, he begins thrusting, his pace becoming faster and faster with each passing stroke.

Your fingers claw at the sheet beneath you, bunching it up in your fists when he keeps hitting the same spot inside you – over and over again he hits it, cries spilling over your lips and urging him to go faster.

At the sound of your cries, his hips begin snapping against your ass with an almost deadly force and the oh so familiar feeling of pressure building in your stomach, spreads to the rest of your body.

“Baby don’t stop!” You plead when you feel him slowing down. The pressure inside you is slowly fading when he stills completely.

Yoongi withdraws from you completely, his hands gliding down to your cheeks to gently massage them before landing a slap on each of them.

“Turn around.” He instructs and with shaking legs you immediately turn over, your legs falling open at their own accord.

The look he sends you, has you arching off the bed. His eyes are still dark, the darkest you think you’ve ever seen them, and a light layer of sweat has appeared on his skin, making him look unreal. His hair is disheveled and somewhat a mess, but you can’t imagine that you look any different from him in this moment.

A layer of sweat has also appeared on your skin, and you are almost sure that your hair resembles a bird’s nest at this point.

Grabbing himself in his hand, he pumps his hard cock a few times, letting you watch him as he slowly squeezes a droplet of pre cum from his tip and smearing it down his shaft.

You nearly combust at the sight, your fingers itching to reach out and touch him. But you don’t get the chance, Yoongi is already guiding his tip to your entrance. He presses in slightly, the pressure making you arch of the bed, but then pulls back, running his tip form your entrance to your clit.

But he never makes direct contact with it. He avoids it, circling around it and back down to your entrance where he repeats the action. Again, and again, till you’re withering mess.  

“Yoongi please!” You beg him on a broken breath. “No more, no more teasing… please!”

“No more teasing?”

You shake your head. “No more.”

He sinks into you slowly, burying himself to the hilt. You gasp. He feels so much bigger inside you in this position, your hands reaching down to cup your breasts.

“It’s not fun being teased, is it?” he pants as he withdraws just as slowly as he entered you.

He’s making you feel how he felt, giving you a taste of your own medicine. Only this is on a much larger level than yours.

“I’m sorry,” you whisper.

You’re really not, but at this point you’re willing to say just about anything to get him to move and to let him make you cum.

And it seems to work. A slow smile stretches across his face and he leans down, covering you with his body and once again he brings your hands above your head with his left hand. He keeps them there while he begins setting a rhythm with his hips.

He brushes his lips against yours, and it’s the first time tonight that you kiss. Eagerly, you kiss him back. You’ve missed feeling his lips against yours all night. Skimming his tongue across your bottom lip, you open up for him and he takes full advantage. His tongue slipping into your mouth, dancing with your own.

Closing your eyes, you whimper into the kiss, his pace going from slow and even to fast and sharp. Gasping, your mouths separate, your head tilting towards the ceiling as the pleasure begins building up once more.

“Shit. Fuck. Fuuuck!” Your mumbling into the pillow and the thin air, your head trashing around each time the tip of his cock rubs against your g spot, stars flying across your eyes.

Letting go you’re your wrists, Yoongi sits back on his haunches, he grabs you by your claves and raises your feet from the bed to bring them over his shoulders. The new position makes his cock slip even further inside you, the new pressure making your head swirl and your vision blur.

“Oh god!” You moan at the same time Yoongi curses loudly.

“Fuck!”

On that note, he begins moving furiously. Now, he’s a man on a mission. This time he isn’t playing around or trying to teach anyone a lesson. This time he’s chasing his high.

Relentlessly, he pounds in and out of you. His cock reaching places you didn’t know was possible to even reach. A tight knot forms in the pit of your stomach, threatening to burst at any moment. You are clenching around his cock like crazy, the action making him lose his focus and his thrusts become erratic.

Your arms are desperately trying to grab onto anything in their reach, eventually settling on your breasts.

“God! Fuck! I’m gonna cum!” He growls, biting the inside of your calf, the drive of his hips never stopping as he fills you up.

You are right behind him. With a loud cry of his name, the knot in your stomach explodes, a sensation of fireworks racing through your body, your vision going white and your breath lost.

Time seems to stop, as you both ride out the last bits of your orgasms. Yoongi’s hips slow down little by little, his face buried in the side of your leg and his lips skimming across your damp skin.

“Fuck.” You are both trying to catch your breath, the aftershock of your orgasms still intense.

At last, his hips still completely, his cock resting deep inside you. He releases your legs, letting them fall to the mattress and lowers himself on top of you. Smoothing your hair away from your face, he lowers his lips to yours, brushing them lightly together before kissing you deeply.

Closing your eyes, you lose yourself in the kiss, your body still tingling from your orgasm. You run your finger up the expanse of his back, your nails scraping delicately against his clammy skin.

“I wasn’t too rough, was I?” He breaks the kiss, asking to make sure that you are okay.

With a hum you shake your head, your eyes still closed. “Not at all.”

Slowly you peal your eyes open, the sight of Yoongi’s handsome face coming into view and making a lazy smile spread on your lips.

“A little mean, but…” you shrug a laugh.

“That’ll teach you not to tease me like that again.” He pecks your lips.

“Well see.”

Well... i think that’s the filthiest smut i’ve ever written and now i need holy water! 

But you know the drill, remember to like and reblog if you enjoyed reading! Thank youuuu

All Rights Reserved © 2020 Kookscrescent

[burnedbyshoto]

Ashido Mina

a/n: so, here’s to the start of my event! sfw is above the cut, nsfw is below it! I’m having a lot of fun with these and I hope you all enjoy :D

SFW

A = Affection (How affectionate are they with a s/o?)

Super affectionate with you. You need a hug, a kiss??? Mina will provide everything needed

B = Breath (What could their s/o do to take their breath away?)

Come out of nowhere and hug her from behind, or plan something super romantic and spontaneous, she’s such a romantic that the more cliche the better

C = Cuddling (Do they cuddle? If they do, how and when do they cuddle?)

Mina loves being the big spoon because she loves to bury her nose into your hair. She will cuddle with you whenever you please honesty

D = Dream (What do they dream of doing with their s/o?)

She wants nothing more than to win a dancing competition with you, or at the very least join one with you

E = Effort (How much effort do they put into a relationship?)

A lot of effort, she’s the type to date intending on marrying who she’s marrying so, you better treat her right

F = Fear (What do they do if their s/o is scared? How do they handle it?)

She will get a big blanket and roll you up and just hold you, you’re a burrito baby now

G = Gifts (What type of gifts do they give their s/o? Do they want a gift in return?)

she is the type to give you over the top things. think of jim’s present to pam during christmas before they got together… yeah, pretty intimate and intense but something you’ll love.

mina loves a gift in return and she especially loves gifts where she gets to do thinking’s with you!

H = Hugs (Do they hug their s/o? How often?)

hugging all the time!!! she loves touching you!!!

I = Intimacy (How romantic are they? Do they have problems with intimacy?)

a total romantic, everything she does for you is done with hearts in her eyes, and she has no issues with prodcasting such love

J = Jealous (Do they get jealous? How do they act when jealous?)

while not one too typical to get jealous because she trusts in you, when she gets jealous know she gets touchy. like stand behind you with her mouth to your neck touchy.

K = Kiss (Are they a good kisser? Do they like to kiss? How often do they try to kiss you?)

minas kisses are super gentle and sweet, she’s not the best kisser but she’s so passionate about it that you forget. if you go a day without getting at least ten kisses from mina, something’s wrong

L = Love (When do they say they love you? How often do they say it? Do they prefer to say or show it?)

mina doesn’t know what to do when she figures out she loves you. it’s something she’s always imagined feeling but now that it’s real she can only gape like a fish. she’ll accidentally blurt it out before her 10 step plan to confess happens. she prefers to show it then say it.

M = Marriage (Do they want to get married? If so, what kind of ceremony?)

she wants a full out reception party. she wants the biggest dance floor and the two of you to perform 194930 dances together.

N = Night out (What type of dates do they like to go on? How often do they like to go on them?)

mina actually treasures dates where the two of you stay in! the both of you lead busy outside lives that intimate ones indoors resonate deeper within her heart

O = Out of the Ordinary (What’s something they don’t normally do with/for their s/o?)

there’s not much she wouldn’t do for you, but on the rarest of occasions she’ll let you touch her horns.

P =Playful (Are they playful in a relationship? If so, how do they play around/mess with their s/o?)

super playful relationship! playing nerd gun fights in pjs at two in the morning! laughter is always echoing in the hallways with you two

Q = Questions (Do they ask their s/o their opinion on things? Do they share theirs?)

she’ll always ask for opinions on things she’s unsure of and will ALWAYS give her own thoughts about it

R = Random (How spontaneous is their relationship? Do they do things on the spot or plan ahead?)

she is a very big on the spot person! not that she doesn’t plan things out, just successwise she has better on the spot events

S = Sleep (How do they sleep with their s/o?)

the two of you nap together more, especially during high school because you both are too nervous at getting caught in the others room overnight!

T = Trust (How much do they trust their s/o?)

trusts you completely. if she didn’t trust you, she wouldn’t have ever asked you out

U = Unique (What makes them unique as a s/o?)

how deeply she loves. your hobbies will become her hobbies. it doesn’t matter because mina loves dancing and you do it with her, so you best believe she will do whatever hobby you love the most!

V = Vulnerable (How long until they can be vulnerable around their s/o? What are they like in this state?)

being vulnerable with you is super hard for mina because she’s always just so hyper and cheery, that the first time she’s vulnerable it makes you worry because it’s super super scary to see her sad and horns wilting as if in response. it takes about three months for her to show you this side.

W = Wild Card (Get a random domestic headcanon of the character of your choice)

mina loves comparing her hand size with you. whether they’re bigger or smaller than hers, she’s just fascinated by your hands she can’t help but stare and compare.

X = X-Ray (What would they do if their s/o got injured?)

suddenly number 18 in the class is outperforming number 1 in the class. she becomes instant health genius as she does anything to make you feel better

“mina is just a paper cut!”

“if we make it a slightly deeper cut you won’t feel the stinging pain anymore!”

Y = Yuck (Do they have any pet peeves about their s/o? Are there any habits that might bother their s/o?)

constant negativity. like the yucky kind that drains the fun from everything. she hates that in a s/o so much. like there’s a difference between that and being a pessimist and she sees and understands that.

Z = Zeal (Are they passionate as a s/o? Do they want or like passion?)

she wants and LIKES THE PASSION OKAY?! give mina her ideal love 2k19

NSFW:

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

Mina lays there breathing for a full 5 minutes

She is always overwhelmed post sex, just give her a minute

While not the best at cleaning up, she lowkey loves just laying in your guys mess, she will always cuddle and hold you.

Lots of pillow talk

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

On herself, mina prides herself on her arms and legs, she’s extremely proud of her natural strength

Mina is a useless boobs gal. 

dangle them in her fucking face p U H L E A S E

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

Mina fucking loves it when she can get herself to squirt

Like one you guys figure out how to make her squirt it’s going to happen every time y’all fuck cuz it sorta reminds her of her quirk

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Has definitely masturbated to an innocuous picture of you when the two of you went months without seeing each other

never masturbated until the two of you got together tbh

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

Is not experienced at all prior to you! Mina is a romantic with a terrible streak prior to you, but she is a fluid person so she nails everything in the bed fast

F = Favorite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

Favorite position is kneeling. She gets to hold you tight and full access to your boobs.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

Definitely, the lover who goes from super romantic and intimate sex to can barely take this seriously love making

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

Always groomed. The second she knew she was gonna fuck you she got that shit waxed. She has a heart strip though, and yes, her pubes are curly and pink

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…) 

Sex with mina is very very intimate, even if its in a joking matter. She truly cherishes everything about you and will always try making your sex life as amazing as possible

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

Loves masturbating together. Like loves it so much. She loves watching you please yourself while she… ahem… assists you with some toys

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Hair-pulling: she loves having her hair pulled and the feeling of fingers knotting into her curls, degradation: she loves calling you impolite names because of the way you react, roleplaying: LOVES DRESSING UP AND CREATING A NEW PERSONALITY OKAY

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

By far her most favorite place to have sex is in the backseat of a car. It’s risky and hot. She’s addicted.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

Physical reactions. Moan for her, move your body and praise what shes doing for you. Also when you wear that one big t-shirt with your hottest lingerie underneath and give her a lap dance

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

DO NOT TOUCH HER HORNS. THE MOMENT THEY ARE TOUCHED SHE’S DONE

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Loves giving more. Only on special occasions does she like having the attention on her, but for the most part, she will spoil you

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

All depends on her mood! She genuinely loves going fast and rough, but on anniversary nights, she enjoys slow and sensual paces

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

Is definitely down to have a quickie, she thinks it’s hot, but only once every 2 years. She just enjoys being able to hear you scream as loudly as she can make you scream.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

Very experimental! The two of you have designated days for trying out new things just because you’re never too sure

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

Mina actually comes really fast, it’s a big reason as to why she prefers focusing on you! But she has good stamina and can last to three full and kinky rounds.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

Toys are a must.

Vibrators, dildos, strap on, anal beads.

You think of one, you two own it.

They are very used and will go interchangeably, but are more often used on you

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Not that big of a tease actually. Like she may abuse vibrator rights, but it’s not in a teasing way! More like a “i’m trying to make you squirt” way

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

She’s very loud in bed!

Moaning, whining, mewling, and sometimes even begging

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

The first time the two of you had sex, mina came twice in under two minutes. Once because of how your breasts felt rubbing against hers and when you pressed your soaked cunt against her own

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those shirts and pants, picture or words)

Mina is a blessed girl with round perky breasts, probably a dd-cup. her right one is actually bigger surprisingly! And she has inverted nipples. She has larger than average labia

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

Went from sorta there to we fuck at minimum five times a week.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Takes her forever to fall asleep, will be awake long after you pass out

[blackmissfrizzle]

Hot for Teacher part 3

Title: Hot for Teacher part 3

Characters: Steve Rogers x black!reader

Summary: The reader and Steve finally have their date

Warnings: Pre-smut, creepy dudes, and a long ass chapter and no keep reading cuz its mobile

A couple of drinks after your little performance, everyone decided to call it a night and went home. Well everyone except Shantae, she went home with Sam. Steve offered to take you home, but you declined his offer but you told him you would text him when you got home.

As soon as you entered your home, you texted Steve that you made it because if you didn’t, you surely would’ve forgotten.

“Texting Rogers you made it home,” a familiar voice from the shadows asked.

You dropped your keys into the bowl by your door and sighed. “You can’t just text me if I made it home safely like a regular dad?”

Nick Fury never did anything like a regular dad, except the fussing part. You remember the whoopings you used to get because you decided to be a smartass.

Your dad let your pet cat, Goose down, emerged from his seat and gave you a hug. “I’m not a normal dad, sweetie.”

“I’ve noticed. What are you doing here so late, old man? I hope you don’t want a report on my night with Steve.”

Your dad let you out of his embrace and returned to the couch. “No, I’m not even worried about Rogers. Now if you were going out with Stark, we would have a problem. I’m praying that this thing with Rogers work out. Your mama is already planning your wedding and for her future grandkids.”

You threw a pillow at your dad. “You told mama about Steve!?” You slinked down the couch in despair, your mom’s been bugging you about kids since you were an only child. She didn’t care if you got married, she just wanted grandkids.

“You know she’s a better investigator than I am. I couldn’t lie to her.” Its true, no one could lie to your mom, she had a knack for getting to the truth. “Anyways, I’m here to officially recruit you,” your dad stated as he slid a manila folder towards you.

Inside of the folder were photos of a local gang leader, Terrence and he recruited a lot of kids that go to your school. He truly was a menace to society. He didn’t care who got hurt as long as money was lining his pocket. As you went through more photos, you saw Terrence with an older gentleman.

“The older guy with Terrence works for Ghost, a terrorist who probably has done as much as evil as HYDRA. I know you got a couple of students connected with Terrence. I need you to find out what Terrence has planned with Ghost.”

On occasion, you were known to get involved with your students’ personal lives if they were in trouble. One instance, you fought in an underground fight club match so your student wouldn’t have to, but that was different. Your dad wanted you to work for SHIELD in an official capacity and that was big deal.

You pinched your nose, “This is a one-time thing. And I’m only doing this for the kids.”

Knowing that he won, your dad broke out into a shit-eating grin that few people got to witness. “Thanks, sweetheart. I’ll have Hill send you a briefing within the next 72 hours and you’ll report to me on Saturdays. Now I’ll see myself out.” He gave you a kiss on the temple on his way out.

Great, in the same night you landed a date with Steve Rogers and became a SHIELD agent.

The following days you and Steve were texting and talking non-stop. Sometimes it was silly stuff about the stuff he missed while he was in the ice. At least he knew about the greats like, Marvin Gaye and Aretha, but you had to put him on Beyoncé and the masterwork of Lemonade. Other times you would talk about more serious stuff like, his time in the army or you training as a super spy as a child.

One day, Steve actually stopped by your school during your planning period to bring you lunch, since you told him earlier that you didn’t eat anything that day, because you were so busy. Even though, you couldn’t talk to him because you allowed some students to come for a tutoring session, he stayed and helped you by grading some papers. You were convinced that Steve was angel and you were praying that everything would work out.

Friday came before you knew it, but the day dragged on. Somehow, your students found out that your date with Steve was that night and they teased you all day long, especially since they could sense you were anxious. When 3:30 stroked, you practically ran out with the students and sped out the parking lot.

Arriving home in record time, you decided to try and take a nap, because if you stayed up you would’ve gotten ready early and been a nervous wreck. The week must’ve caught up with you, because you had no trouble taking a nap.

—

Soon, you found yourself knocking on Steve’s door at exactly 7pm. He invited you over for dinner and the dance lesson at his place, because when he went out in public people typically recognized him and asked for pictures and he didn’t want to subject you to that invasion of privacy yet.

The breath was knocked out of you when Steve opened the door. He had on an apron over a blue Henley and black jeans, and you didn’t know if it was the domesticity of the apron, the tightness of the Henley, or a combination of both, but you had a hard time stopping yourself from jumping Steve’s bones.

“Hey, come on in.” Steve waved you inside and pulled you into his warm embrace. He smelled like the food he was cooking and his cologne, and you wanted to drown yourself in that scent.

“I like your place. Its comfortable and welcoming.” Your eyes wandered Steve’s apartment. It didn’t feel like the typical bachelor pad. He had photos of his old and new friends placed decoratively, a record player, and a couch that made you sleepy from just looking at it.

Steve grabbed your purse and jacket to put them in a chair in the corner. “Thanks. Tony had Pepper come and decorate.”

The smell of the food had you gravitating towards the kitchen. Before you had a chance to look in the pot, Steve is pulled you towards him and shuffled you to a seat at the dinner table. “No peeking,” he jokingly reprimanded you.

You kissed your teeth in disappointment. “That’s not fair. I just wanted to see what was causing my stomach to growl. I should warn you Rogers, I don’t play about my food.”

Steve gave you a deep belly chuckle as he came back to the table with two plates. “Duly noted.” He set before you a plate of shrimp alfredo pasta, one of your favorite dishes. Steve Rogers was really pulling out all the stops if he kept it up, he might just get lucky, you thought to yourself.

As dinner began the two of you made small talk. You talked about how you had to stop a fight between two of your students, because Lyric stepped on Diego’s shoes and then they began arguing about how the other were too broke to afford good shoes. The joke was on them because, both of their Jordans were knockoffs but you didn’t have it in you to break their hearts. Steve told you how Tony caused the electricity to short-circuit during making a new suit.

“Okay Rogers, enough stalling! Its time for your dance lesson,” you announced at the end of dinner. You backed out of your seat and stood by Steve and reached out for his hand.

He grimaced and regretfully placed his hand in yours. “Promise you won’t make fun of me?”

To soothe his nerves, you kissed him on the cheek and whispered into his ear, “I promise.” It was definitely not the kiss that calmed him down, that made him more nervous, but it was the smile that you gave him while you looked into his eyes that did calm him down.

Steve scrolled through his phone until he selected the song he wanted, and then the bluesy guitar riffs of Tennessee Whiskey began to fill the room.

“Ohhh, you wanna learn how to two-step,” you joked.

The super soldier smiled and down casted his eyes to the floor. “Yeah, you did say you love country and the dance seems easy enough, but,” he held up his hand in objection. “I don’t think I’ll be ready for any twirls or lifts.”

It was your turn to give a belly-out laugh. “You’re that bad, huh?”

Steve pulled you into him and swayed the both of you side-to-side. “You’re about to see,” he whispered into your ear.

His dancing wasn’t so bad, but then again you two were only doing a basic slow dance. Confident that he could start doing the two-step, you instructed Steve that he had to take two steps forward and one step back.

After his failed attempts and a couple of stubbed toes, you took the lead to demonstrate how Steve should lead. You took the lead before with your friends, but this time was different because first, Steve obviously wasn’t a female and second, you felt smaller than your dancing partner.

“I think I got the hang of it now. I can lead if you want me to.” Steve commented after you being in the lead for fifteen minutes.

“Are you sure?” Instead of verbally responding, Steve took charge and he was much better than he was at the beginning of the lesson. He would stumble every so often and mumble ‘shit, I’m sorry’, but other than that he was great. Steve even managed to end your last dance with a twirl.

Currently the two you were sharing dessert while sitting on his couch and listening to music.

“So how did I do, teach?” Steve asked between bites.

You nodded your head side-to-side in deep thought. “Umm, it was rough in the beginning. Like for the life of me, I don’t understand how someone who fights in life or death situations and still trips over their own feet while dancing. But you got it at the end and that’s all that matters.”

“True, but I couldn’t have done it without my wonderful teacher.” Steve’s voice dropped lower as he intertwined his fingers with yours.

The both of you sat there in silence while the sexual tension filled the room until it boiled over. You don’t know who made the first move, but suddenly you were in Steve’s lap exchanging kisses. Steve must’ve had some practice since 1945, because the things his mouth was doing to yours made you wonder if he could do the same thing to your lower lips.

Abruptly, Steve pulled away to stop kissing you. “Damn, I forgot to ask. Are you okay with this?” Wow, only Steve Rogers would stop making out just to ensure he had consent. At that moment you knew Steve would own your heart sooner rather than later.

In response, you assaulted Steve with your lips and he gave a growl of approval. He flipped the two of you so you were laying on the couch while he was on top. Both of you were exploring the other’s body, getting dangerously close to start undressing the other.

Your hands were reaching for Steve’s belt buckle when your phone started ringing. Steve tried to get you to answer it, but you were too wrapped up in the idea of seeing what Steve was packing under his jeans.

“Doll, I really think you should answer it,” Steve suggested as the caller called for the second time.

Angrily you reached for the phone and answered, “Hello.”

“Umm, Ms. Y/L/N this is Nia.” Quickly your attitude was gone and you were on high alert. You gave some of your students your phone number, because you knew they had some troubles at home and you told them to not to hesitate to call you if they were in danger or trouble. If Nia was calling she was in some serious trouble, because she always had this jokester/tough girl exterior thing going on.

“Nia, what’s going on sweetie?” Steve was automatically on alert as he heard you say your student’s name.

“Can you come by, please? My…my…my…my mmm-mom owes these guys money and they’re beating on her and I-II-III-I think they’re coming for me next.” The young girl stuttered through her tears.

You were already grabbing your things before Nia explained the whole situation. “I’m on my way. Just lock yourself up until I get there, okay.”

“I already did. Thank you, Ms. Y/L/N.”

As you gathered your things, you didn’t notice Steve was getting ready as well. “I gotta go. Nia’s in trouble.”

“No problem. I’m going with and I’m driving.” You didn’t have time to argue with Steve and you were grateful anyway, so you hopped on the back of his motorcycle.

Before you got to Nia’s apartment door you could hear the fight in the hallway and no one in the complex would go in help, but they sure did have time to stand in the hallway and listen. If you weren’t on a mission to save Nia, you would’ve cuss they asses out.

Finally, you and Steve approached the door with his shield on his arm and your sai in your hands. Giving each other a nod, Steve finally kicked down the door.

The two of you were greeted to the sight of two men, who looked like they belonged on someone’s defensive line beating on Nia’s mom, who was clearly a drug addict. Then another figure caught your eye. It was another man and he was trying to kick down the door that most likely held Nia behind it.

The two guys hitting on Nia’s mom made eye contact with the two of you and made one of the smartest decisions they made that night. They ran.

“I’ll handle that one and you go get those two,” you ordered Steve as you nodded your head in the direction of the door.

“Be safe!” Steve yelled as he ran out the door.

The other asshat finally stopped pounding on the door and looked you up and down with a mix of lust and mirth. “What? Are you the new diversity hire for the Avengers?”

“Ha ha ha. You’re a real comedian. Why are you beating on my student’s mom and trying to burst into her room?”

All of the laughter left his face and it was replaced by a mask of anger. “Because that druggie bitch,” he pointed his gun at Nia’s mom. “Owes my boss money and she refused to pay up so I thought a little fun time with that little ho she calls a daughter could be a down payment.”

Disgusted at the man’s sick plans for Nia, you rolled your eyes. “You thought wrong.”

“Oh, what you gone do about it?” Ole dude pointed the gun in your direction.

You let out a desperate sigh and rolled your shoulders. “Listen, you and your crew ruined my date so I’m already pissed. So, are you sure you wanna do this?”

He looked you up and down in contempt. “Am I supposed to be scared of you, teach?” That’s all the answer you needed. Next thing you did was throw one of your sai’s into the man’s gun and sent a flying kick to his chest, effectively knocking him out.

After you cuffed him to the dining table, you knocked on Nia’s door. “Hey, Nia, sweetie. It’s Ms. Y/L/N. You can come out now.”

Tentatively Nia opened the door, but once she saw you she bum-rushed you. You stroked the young girl between her puff balls as you held her while she cried.

“Thank you, Ms. Y/L/N,” Nia confessed between sobs.

“No problem, sweetie. Are you ok?”

Nia pulled away from slightly to look up at you. “Yeah, I’m good. Sorry I ruined your date with Captain America.”

You grabbed the young girl by the shoulders and knelt down until you were eye level with her. “No, I’m happy you called. It means that you’re safe now.”

After calming Nia down, you checked on her mother and gave her a gentle but stern warning about using drugs. It seemed that the woman took it to heart, but God only knows.

Once you were sure that they were okay, you took the intruder to meet with Steve outside. He currently had the other two guys knocked out as well.

Steve pointed at the guy you were dragging. “You know you could’ve called me to get him.”

You shrugged your shoulders and gave a look of indifference. “Eh, I liked that he kept bumping his head on the stairs. And besides I need the arm workout.”

All three men were unconscious and you needed them awake. With no water on hand you had to kick them to jolt them awake, but it’s not like you felt bad about it.

A chorus of ‘what the fuck’ pierced the air as they awoke.

“Okay, this is how it’s gonna go. All three of you are now my bitches and work for me now and gonna be my informants. I need you to tell me about any information you have on Terrence and any business dealings he has with a Ghost. And if you don’t wanna comply or I feel that you’re jerking my chain, I’ll throw your ass at a SHIELD black site like that,” you threatened with a snap of your finger.

The douchebags were pissed off and wanted to say something, but one look at your face and they knew you weren’t playing. You had those Fury genes to thank for that.

Each grumpily agreed to your terms of conditions. Before they left you did threaten to cut off their balls if they attacked Nia and her mother or any other woman like that again.

—

When the two of you returned, you immediately apologized to Steve. “I’m sorry, I ruined your night. I’m sure you get tired of fighting and that’s exactly what you did on your night off.”

Steve reached out to you and placed a kiss on the back of your hands. “You didn’t ruin anything. Tonight was perfect and I like that you’ll drop anything for your students to help them out.”

“Thanks, everything was really great tonight. I hope we can do it again, but I should go. I have an early morning tomorrow.”

As you reached for the doorknob, Steve pulled you back and ask about turning the guys into informants. You informed Steve of you officially becoming a SHIELD agent to find Ghost through Terrence’s crew.

“I mean it’s only if you’re comfortable,” Steve scratched the back of his neck as a nervous tick. “But since it’s late and my place is closer to the tower, you could stay here for the night. But that’s only if you want to,” Steve hurriedly added on the last part.

Steve’s place was closer and he was harmless, you thought to yourself. “If you don’t mind, I would love to stay.”

The soldier was elated you decided to stay. He tried to give you his guest room, but you preferred to sleep in his bed with him.

Thankfully, you always had a go bag, so all you needed from Steve was something to sleep in.

When you emerged from the bathroom, Steve automatically grabbed a pillow to cover his hard on. He didn’t think he would have such a strong reaction to you wearing his shirt. Right at that moment he vowed that every chance he had, he would try to get you into one of his shirts.

“What are you staring at, pretty boy,” you teased, knowing full well Steve was staring at your curves.

Climbing into the bed and straddling his lap, you felt Steve’s erection. Deciding to be a tease, you rolled your hips around, which elicited a sinful moan from Steve’s mouth.

Promptly, Steve plopped you on the other side of the bed.

“What the hell, Steve? What’s that for?”

Suddenly, there was a shift in the air. Gone was the sweet and nervous Steve, but there was the confident and dominant Steve.

He gripped your chin and pulled your face closer to his.

“When I fuck you, you won’t be able to properly function for the next couple of days. And I doubt you want to accidentally call me daddy in front of your dad tomorrow, but if you do, then by all means let’s get to it.”

Steve was motioning to take off his shirt when you let out a meek, “I’m good.” You wanted nothing more than to be underneath Steve writhing in pleasure, but the way he may it sound you would be silly putty in the end and you didn’t need that your first day at SHIELD.

The blonde pulled his shirt back down and smirked at you. He kissed the side of your head and told you good night before he wrapped his arm around your waist.

Now you had to go to sleep hoping there wouldn’t be a wet puddle on the bed from your dreams of Steve screwing you silly.

Tags: @jojolu @ladyamandapanda12 @kashirenae92 @areubeingserved @dumbchick @wakanda-inspired @blacknthemix @pastelastronomy24 @chaneajoyyy @chonisberonica @everything-is-awesomesauce @blackreaders-assemble @nickidub718 @valkyriesnymph @marvelmaree @lildashofmelanin @cyrioussoul @destinio1 @toniilaney @euphoric05 @yoyolovesbucky @the-undecided-compass

[etherealwaifgoddess]

Maybe I Am? - Chpt.1

Characters: Steve Rogers x Bucky Barnes

Summary: After meeting in a chatroom Steve and Bucky finally meet up in real life, however Bucky isn’t anything Steve was expecting. Master list HERE.

Content Warning: a very confused Steve, an adorably disappointed Bucky. 

Word Count: 3.1k

Author’s Note: Hello lovelies! One of my favorite versions of Steve is the sweet confused Steve, and so I decided to have a little fun with him in this fic. Also, Steve Rogers is a Slytherin and I will fight ya’ll to the death on that one. If you don’t believe me read #10 in THIS article. There will be six chapters total, one posted every evening until we’re done. Hope you enjoy! XOXO - Ash

Chapter One

Bucky stared at Alpine, desperate for more companionship than the fluffy white cat could provide. He’d been stuck inside for the past four days while he got over the damned late winter cold he’d caught. Bucky hadn’t been sick in almost two years so he couldn’t really complain, but he was social by nature and Alpine could only do so much for her end of the conversation. He finally drug himself out of bed, carrying his fluffy duvet to the sofa with him so he could throw on a rerun of The Good Place and fire up his laptop. Bucky logged into the chat site he used to frequent that hosted discussions on all different fandoms from movies to television shows to music. He used to love hanging out online in some of the Harry Potter chats, especially HuffleHaven which he was pleased to see was still active. Bored and not really feeling up to fangirling at a level appropriate for a proud Hufflepuff, he hopped into a punk rock appreciation chat to hopefully find a way out of his bored funk. 

WinterBae: so ur a Greenday fan?

AmericanIdiot: What was your first clue?

WinterBae: well i heard the sounds of hysteria

AmericanIdiot: LOL nice. Is that your cat in the profile pic?

WinterBae: yuppp, that’s my girl Alpine

AmericanIdiot: She looks sweet. So, what fandom are you here for?

Bucky flicked over to view AmericanIdiot’s profile and was instantly smitten with the blonde who claimed punk rock was life and he could live on tacos alone if given the chance. He wondered briefly if the pic was real, it wasn’t unheard of for people to use model’s photos instead of their own, and the guy in AmericanIdiot’s picture was definitely model worthy. Tall, buff, and gorgeous; Bucky was definitely interested in more than conversation. Well, nothing to make himself feel better than a little harmless flirting. 

xxXxx

Three months later.

AmericanIdiot: I can’t believe I let you talk me into this.

WinterBae: oh come on! it’s not that bad, just let the hat sort you and i’ll let you retreat to your boring punk rock group. 

AmericanIdiot: You so owe me for this one. 

WinterBae: puhleeeease please please please

AmericanIdiot: FINE. But you still owe me. 

WinterBae: whatever you want. Promise :D

[Private Chat Initiated]

AmericanIdiot: Well shit. 

WinterBae: was i right??

AmericanIdiot: I hate you. 

WinterBae: nope, u luv me. and i told u so ;)

AmericanIdiot: How in the ever loving fuck am I a Slytherin?? I literally help my neighbor with her grocery bags every week! I feel like a puppy kicker now.

WinterBae: the hat sees inside ur soul puppy kicker mwahaha

AmericanIdiot: You totally owe me. 

WinterBae: fine. coffee? sunday morning maybe? r u near red hook? 

AmericanIdiot: I’m over in Park Slope. So not too far. Wait, are you serious? You really want to meet up?

WinterBae: let’s meet @ magnolia cafe 10am on sunday

AmericanIdiot: But how will I know it’s you?

WinterBae: i’ll wear a red rose tucked in my hair. cuz i’m classy like that lol

AmericanIdiot: Haha. Nice. I can’t wait.

WinterBae: me too :)

Steve closed the lid of his laptop, unable to believe his luck. He was finally going to meet WinterBae in real life after months of witty banter and playful flirting. He pulled on his sneakers, ready to go run out all the nervous energy thrumming inside him, and he hoped he wasn’t getting his hopes too high. Sam had already pointed out several times that he didn’t know a whole lot about WinterBae, not even what she really looked like. Steve maintained he wasn’t shallow and he knew enough about her to know that she was everything he’d hoped to find in a woman. She was bright and funny, kept him on his toes for sure, and had a biting wit that left him laughing harder than he had in years. Steve had been so lonely since Peggy up and left him, moving back to England after eight months of living together. He was finally ready to move on and he hoped WinterBae would be the one to do that with. 

Across the bustling streets of Brooklyn, in his little apartment in Red Hook, Bucky was rapid fire texting Nat about his date. She cheered him on good naturedly, happy he was actually putting himself back out there after the disaster that was Brock Rumlow. Bucky was proud that he’d been so smooth in asking AmericanIdiot to meet up, or at least smooth by his own nerdy standards. He reminded himself several times that even if the profile pic wasn’t really AmericanIdiot, he would most likely still be interested. How could he not be after spending the past three months talking to the guy every day? They talked about everything together and Bucky felt like he knew AmericanIdiot better than some of his real life friends. Two more days and he would have a name and a face to put with the amazing, brilliant, artistic guy he was completely head over heels for. Now he just had to figure out where to buy a red rose.

xxXxx

Bucky sat at a small cafe table inside Magnolia Cafe, trying not to fidget with the rose tucked behind his ear. He felt a little silly for wearing it, but also kind of like he was in a romance novel waiting to meet his knight in shining armor. He had worn his very best skinny jeans and a black button up with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, leaving his assortment of bracelets on display. He wasn’t getting his hopes up, but damned if he wasn’t going to look his best just in case. Nat had insisted on going along, wanting to make sure Bucky’s online friend wasn’t some kind of creeper. The fierce redhead sat a few tables away, poised and ready to strike should the guy make any untoward moves. Bucky loved how protective Nat was, though honestly she was a bit terrifying at times. So he waited, scrolling through Buzzfeed News, hoping that maybe this once luck would be on his side.

Steve was so nervous he was sweating a little by the time he got to the cafe. He wiped his palms on the side of his tee shirt, wondering belatedly if he should have put in a little more effort. All he had was work clothes anymore, even the navy tee he had on was emblazoned with their star logo and the name of their gym underneath. Paired with the only jeans he owned and a lightweight leather jacket, he hoped he would make a good first impression. WinterBae had mentioned being into fashion but Steve had never had an eye for that sort of thing. Nerves rising, Steve hoped he would be able to find WinterBae easily. He knew only that she would have a red rose tucked in her hair, and from a brief mention a few weeks ago about haircuts, he knew to expect shoulder length wavy brown hair. But that was it. Steve reminded himself that he needed to go into this with open eyes, if nothing else he would walk away with a new friend. Someone other than Sam to hang out with, somewhere other than the gym they co-owned. Deep down though, he still hoped for more.

The cafe was dimly lit inside and it took Steve a minute to let his eyes adjust. He scanned the room quickly, taking note of all the women sitting at various tables. Most were with other people, leaving only four on their own, but try as he might he couldn’t spot red roses on any of them. He felt a pang of disappointment but prayed he was just early and not being stood up. He was about to go order himself an Americano to sip while he waited when he heard a rough, masculine voice call out “AmericanIdiot?” in a tone tinged with awe.

Steve turned in the direction of the voice to see a man about his age with a red rose tucked into his shoulder length wavy brown hair. His mouth moved while his brain reeled, “WinterBae?”

“Yeah! Hey!” Bucky felt like he was vibrating out of his skin; he was so thrilled. The blonde god standing in front of him really was the man from the picture, and he looked even better in real life, if that was possible. Brilliant, sweet, and hot. Bucky had hit the jackpot. 

Steve let himself be pulled into a warm hug, the man was a few inches shorter than his own 6’2” and fit nicely against his chest. The man. WinterBae was a man. Steve replayed all of their conversations in his head and kept coming up with the same assumption. Steve had never once in a million years thought he was a man. He supposed in retrospect that having a female best friend, a love of clothes, and a cat he called a “fur baby” was not necessarily concrete signs of being a woman, but damned if Steve had even thought twice about WinterBae’s gender. He forced himself to return the hug, happy to meet a new friend, even though his heart was crushed under the disappointment that nothing more would be coming of this meeting. 

“I’m so glad you made it.” Bucky told him as they pulled apart.

“Of course. Gotta get my cup of coffee for being tortured by a magical hat.” 

Bucky laughed, a rich rumbling sound, “Yeah, a Slytherin would never pass up the opportunity to benefit off the kindness of others.” 

“Well at least your poor little Huffle-brain won’t realize what’s going on.” 

“Ouch, punk. Those are some strong words from someone who watched Sorcerer's Stone for the first time less than a month ago.” 

“It’s your fault I did too, jerk. Uh, you can call me Steve by the way.” 

“Steve, nice. It suits you. I’m Bucky. Well, James, but everyone calls me Bucky.” 

“Now that’s a story I have to hear.” Steve said with a laugh and let Bucky lead him over to the line for his drink. 

They ended up spending two and a half hours talking at their little table at the cafe. Coffee turned into a muffin to split, which turned into a panini and iced teas for both of them. Steve couldn’t remember the last time conversation flowed so easily with someone. Talking to Bucky felt like they had been best friends for years opposed to only knowing each other a few months. They topic hopped relentlessly, never losing each other along the way. Steve found himself laughing so hard his ribs hurt when Bucky spoke about one of his teenage misadventures with his sister Becca. 

Bucky was very clearly flirting by the time they finished their lunch; shooting Steve sweet little smiles every so often and pushing his hair back behind his ear coyly. Steve knew he should put the breaks on the flirting, he didn’t want to lead Bucky on, but it was so much easier to just smile along with him. In his thirty years of life, Steve had never once questioned his sexuality. Men had never held any attraction for him, but something about the way Bucky chewed on his bottom lip, the tiny tip of his pink tongue peeking out, had part of Steve wanting to taste that lip himself. 

With a cough, Steve shook his head, trying to clear his unexpected wayward thoughts. “I’m sorry, I missed that.” he prompted.

Bucky titled his head slightly with a lopsided smile, “It’s okay. I was just saying that my sister was the one who gave me the courage to come out to my parents. She came out first and seeing how my parents reacted made it a lot easier for me to. She was only 15 at the time, but she always has been a hell of a lot braver than I am.” 

“I doubt that. But that’s great you guys are so close.” 

“Yeah, she’s been my best friend since the day she was born. Well, other than Nat, but don’t tell her that.” Bucky chuckled thinking back on the loving bickering Becca and Nat used to do when they were younger. “So how did you come out to your parents?” 

Steve wanted to die on the spot. A bright blush tinged his cheeks, staining his pale skin all the way down his neck. “I, uh. Well. I’m not. Um. I didn’t, actually. Because I’m not, um, gay.” Please god, let the ground open up and swallow me whole, he prayed silently, unable to meet Bucky’s eyes. 

The smile Bucky had worn, waiting for what he thought must have been one hell of a story based on Steve's blush, completely vanished. Along with all his foolish daydreams of dating someone as amazing as Steve. “Oh. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have assumed.” he finally choked out semi-normal sounding. 

“No, it’s my fault.” Steve hastily protested, “We talked so much online and I didn’t realize you were a man.” The wide eyed shock on Bucky’s face made Steve realize he hadn’t made things any better.

“Wait, what? You thought I was a woman?” Bucky asked incredulously. 

“Well, yeah. Nothing about your profile or our conversations were very clear and I guess I just somehow jumped to the conclusion that you were. I’m sorry, Bucky.” 

Disappointed but not wanting to miss out on a great friendship Bucky forced himself to smile reassuringly at Steve. “It’s okay. No harm done. So you're straight then?”

“I think so.” 

That did not help things. “That’s kinda something you know.” 

“Yeah, I thought so too. I like talking to you though. A lot.” Bucky was looking at him like he had three heads and Steve just wanted to crawl home and die of embarrassment. 

“Okay. I like talking to you a lot too. We can just be friends though, Steve. I’m not going to get my feelings hurt just because you bat for the other team.” 

“Thanks. I really am sorry. If I were to ever switch teams you’d be the first guy I call. You’re incredible.” 

“Aww come on. You don’t gotta say that. It’s all good, really. Now tell me more about this gym you run.”

Steve sighed, thankful to change topics, “Well, my best friend Sam and I opened it when he retired from the Air Force six years ago.” Steve launched into the story of how he met Sam through the VA where they had both volunteered as teenagers and then years later, they teamed up to start Shield Gym which was now one of the most popular gyms in the city.

The conversation lulled a little after that and Bucky politely refrained from any more flirting. Steve found himself missing the cute little gestures. He couldn’t figure out what the hell was wrong with him but he knew he needed to figure it out sooner rather than later. They parted as friends, swapping cell phone numbers so they could text instead of the message boards and private chats online. Steve initiated the goodbye hug, wanting to test the feeling of the smaller man in his arms once more. It was just as nice as the first time and only added to Steve’s confusion. 

Nat caught up with Bucky barely a block from the cafe, pulling him for a tight hug when she saw his morose expression. “Do I need to kill him?” she asked seriously.

“He's straight.” Bucky told her, “Well, he said he thinks he’s straight. Whatever the hell that means.” 

Nat quirked a brow at that, not commenting though.

“Either way, back to spending all my nights with you and Alpine. And Becca, when the brat has time to fly out.” 

“Maybe don’t write him off just yet.” Nat said carefully, “I saw you two together, it was sweet.” 

Bucky sighed, “I can’t do it, Nat. Just let the poor straight boy be slightly confused on his own before he settles down with some perfect human barbie doll he meets at his gym.” 

Nat pursed her lips in disapproval but remained silent. She wrapped an arm around Bucky’s waist and followed him home so they could share a pint of gelato and watch a trashy rom-com until Bukcy felt better.  

“Shit, Sam.” Steve whined at his best friend back in their gym in Park Slope. He’d gone straight from the cafe to the gym, knowing Sam was working the midday shift. “How did this happen?”

“You made an honest mistake, it happens.” Sam tried to be kind with his words, “But, and I’m not saying I told you so, you didn’t really know as much about this guy as you thought you did.” 

“That might have been the politest ‘I told you so’ ever.” 

“I am sorry that it didn’t work out though. I know you thought you really falling for this WinterBae.” 

“His name is Bucky. And, I don’t know Sam, he’s just as incredible in person. More so, even. I don’t know what to do. I’m not gay. But…. maybe I am?” 

Sam set down the bottle of spray disinfectant and the rag he was wiping down the machines with. “Steve, I know you had your hopes up for this guy. But he’s a guy. And being straight, or not straight, is typically something you figure out before your thirties.” 

“I know. I know.” Steve groaned, raking his hands through his hair. 

“At least you made a new friend, right?” Sam tried hopefully.

Steve shook his head, “Yeah, but it doesn’t feel like enough. I don’t know what to do, Sam.”

“You gotta figure that one out on your own, man. But whatever you do, don’t drag that poor boy through whatever premature mid life crisis you got going on. It wouldn’t be fair to him to get his hopes up.” 

“I know that.” Steve fought to keep the glare he wanted to give Sam off his face, “I would never hurt him. I just… I need to think about it, I guess.” 

Sam clapped Steve on the shoulder supportively before resuming his cleaning, “You do that. And if you need someone to talk to, I’m here.” 

Steve thanked him and then headed out. He had a lot of thinking to do. 

[talkingismylifewrites]

okay so i'm watching the shit show finale of the bachelor and I just can't help but picture a bachelor au. Like roger is the bachelor and then ends up falling in love with john who works for the crew (maybe a producer or a random engineer, idk) or something and it really is the MOST dramatic season ever

so i wrote out this amazingly detailed answer and it deleted and i’m so pissed but ANYWAYS: 

so roger is the bachelor and it’s amazing and he’s like, the best bachelor ever because he’s so fun??? and nice??? and he’s trying so hard with everyone and everything. like he’s the one bachelor that when they have the final rose??? no one has anything bad to say about him because he’s so fuckign nice, and you can tell it kills him to send someone home (except like, one or two people but that’s early on and deserved)

and the whole time he’s getting close with the cameraman in charge of him, john “big deaks energy” deacon. and they get on like a house on fire, because they’re just having so much fun with each other and laughing and joking and john has the best commentary on everything and everyone. and they get closer and closer and roger’s like coming up with excuses to speak to him, and he trusts his opinion so much!! so when john’s like “hey dude, maybe it’s time to send so and so home, he listens to him!!” 

and john finds himself slowly falling in love with him too, which is ROUGH because he sees roger clearly falling in love with all the other girls (that’s roger’s problem, he’s constantly falling in love but he’s waiting to fall IN LOVE). and its hard because roger is so funny and awesome and he wants to be with him all the time and it sucks having to watch him flirt and kiss. 

but it all comes to ahead with like, four weeks to go??? and roger ends up sending sarina home, and he’s really upset because he liked her, but clearly not enough??? and he’s kinda morose and weepy and he’s sitting in the backyard of the bachelor mansion and crying into a glass of scotch and john’s SUPPOSED to be filming it??? but he sidles up close to him and is like hey buddy it’s fine, and the next thing he knows THEY’RE KISSING OUT AND THEN ROGER’S ON HIS BACK AND THEY’RE REALLY GOING FOR IT!! when john pulls back and is like oh fuck, no, i’m sorry, i can’t-- and he RUNS OFF LIKE BACHELOR CINDERELLA LEAVING BEHIND HIS HEART CAMERA

john ends up quitting, confessing everything to freddie (chris harrison) that he and roger accidentally kissed ( “how does one accidentally kiss?” freddie asked, watching roger and john furiously make out on a pool chair). so roger comes down the next day to talk to john, only to fin that he’s GONE he LEFT in the MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT!!! and he’s just...broken.

the last three girls, veronica, dominique, and debbie, are like, we are gonna break this fucking assholes kneecaps for what he did to him. and they’re FURIOUS they were ALL ROOTING FOR HIM!!! and they all decide together that dom is gonna win this thing to save poor roger’s pride, and they’re gonna get him to the otherside as best as they can. 

meanwhile, john is just, blacked out in his apartment so sad when crystal kicks down his door. and they met during roger’s hometown date and roger told crystal that he thought john was the one?? but clearly john didn’t feel the same so crystals here to kill him. UNTIL he sees what a mess john is?? and then he’s like godDAMNIT okay here’s what we’re gonna do. 

FASTFORWARD and freddie’s like THIS IS THE MOST DRAMATIC SEASON YET!! and its the girls tell all and all the girls are like omg roger was the best we loved him so much but he didn’t love us clearly but its fine becase he invited us to his house warming party-- i brought a succulant!! 

and then ronnie is like, all coy and shit like, oh, it’ll be so exciting to see, we’re all really happy with the outcome. and its just really exciting and no one knows what will happen. so when the finale airs and you see roger standing on the platform in bali, proposing to dom, she shakes her head and she’s like “i don’t think i’m the one you really want to give the rose to.” 

roger is both confused??? and heartbroken!! until you see JOHN!!! walk over to him. JOHN IS IN BALI WEARING A TUX AND HE”S HOLDING A ROSE!!!!

“what are you doing here?” roger asks, terrified and yet so excited and happy. 

(in the background, freddie, dom, and debbie are all clutching at each other like say yes say yes say yes!!!!) 

“well, i was hoping, maybe, if you’d like, you, erm...well. basically, what i’m trying to say, is i like you. and i think you like me too. and i think-- and if you don’t keep in mind i’m deleting all this, i know how to delete it all-- i think we could really, uh....i think we’d be great together,” john stutters, holding out a red rose. 

roger, heart in his eyes, “oh?” 

john, scowling, “don’t be a dick, roger.” 

“you like it,” roger coos, stepping in closer. “i think we’d be good together, too. but you left.” 

“yeah,” john shrugs. “but that’s cuz it’s not exactly kosher for me to fall in love with someone who’s dating twenty other women. also, it says i can’t in my contract.” 

“WE TOOK IT OUT OF YOUR CONTRACT!” freddie shouts from the sidelines before debbie elbows him in the gut. 

“so, what do y’say?” john demands, thrusting the rose out. “will you accept this rose?” 

“yes,” says roger, right before reeling him in for a kiss that ends all kisses. 

so, roger ends the season and its the most popular season ever. freddie, too, finds love on the show with jim, who’s roger’s hairdresser. dom, too, finds love with ronnie. debbie becomes the next bachelorette and she, too, finds love. roger and john’s wedding also gets televised and its the most watched bachelor season. 

and they all live happily every after.  

[365daysofsasuhina]

[ 365 Days of SasuHina || Day Two Hundred Eighty-Seven: She’s Better Than That ] [ Uchiha Sasuke, Uzumaki Naruto ] [ SasuHina, NaruSaku ] [ Verse: Best Years of Your Life ] [ AO3 Link ]

Given his popularity through high school, Sasuke’s been used to people trying to cozy up to him for all the wrong reasons. Especially girls. Even someone like Sakura - who chased him (and drove him up the wall) since their first years of elementary school only gave up in the latter parts of high school. Students would come and go, and with them would be an almost inevitable crush on the moody, broody dark-haired Uchiha.

His brother had suffered the same fate when he was in high school, having to brush admirers aside since he was young. Though...of course, Itachi had been a bit more gentle and polite about it. Nowadays, Sasuke is all but rude depending on the circumstances. While most advances are brushed off with just some light exasperation, others take a more...firm approach.

And lately...he’s needed all the more reason to keep them aside.

Ever since Hinata approached him, he’s been...unsure what to think. He’d been keeping his admiration of her secret for so long, knowing she was so attached to his dumbass best friend. Then he let it slip that day after practice...and she’d given him that odd look. When she actually showed up to his game - even after her bike got a flat - he was pretty taken aback. And of course it was his mother who ended up giving her a lift.

Then, well...he got smacked in the face with a flyaway bat, and she’d just happened to be there to see it and take him to the nurse. He’d never been so embarrassed in his life...but at least she didn’t seem to think he was an idiot. She was just...worried.

And just a few days ago, she actually waited for him after practice, making small talk before...asking if he’d like to go out. Needless to say, he’d been completely blindsided. Her getting over Naruto apparently went a lot easier for her than he thought.

But then again...it sounded like she’d been slowly dwindling hope on the prospect, anyway. Still, for her to make the first move? With how shy he knows her to be? It honestly impressed him.

...and now he’s not sure what to do.

There’s not much of their senior year left, now. He hasn’t asked her what her plans are. His own are just to go to the local university a few cities over and major in business while also (hopefully) playing baseball. Hinata has played volleyball and tennis all four years, but she hasn’t mentioned if she’ll pursue it after high school...or anything about what she’ll do.

...he’s worried they might end up apart so quickly after finally making it together.

Sure, they don’t know each other that well yet, but...he’s always admired her from afar. Soft-spoken, kind, smart, and ridiculously adorable. To say that he’s smitten is putting it lightly. On his side of things, at least, he knows he’s pretty serious. Hinata, on the other hand, hasn’t really seen him the way he’s seen her until...pretty recently. Her attention has been elsewhere for quite some time.

So, he’s been paranoid about what they’ll do once Summer is over. Or even the school year itself, depending on her plans. What if she doesn’t end up feeling as strongly as he does? What if she slips through his fingers?

...he’s not sure what he’d do. He’s had so much ill luck with girls, he doesn’t want this one chance that he wants to pass him by…!

And eventually, someone notices his melancholy.

“What’s been up with you, dude?”

“Huh?”

“You’ve been mopey. Well...I mean, more than usual,” Naruto replies, hopping up on the brick wall out front of the school beside his friend. A bag of chips is clenched between his teeth as he settles himself.

Sasuke wrinkles his nose. “...we have a game tomorrow. You’re really gonna put that garbage in your gut?”

“What? Nothin’ wrong with it! I’ll be fine - I eat crap all the time and never feel it!”

“...that habit’s going to bite you in the ass in a few years,” the Uchiha mutters.

“Now quit tryin’ to change the subject! What’s eatin’ you, dude?”

“Just...thinking a lot lately.”

“Well yeah, I figured. What about?”

“...the end of the year.”

“Aww, you gonna miss me?”

Sasuke deadpans.

“M’just kiddin’! Seriously...what’s wrong? I haven’t seen you look this out of it in a while.”

Sighing, Sasuke runs a hand back through his hair. “...Hinata asked me out the other day.”

Just stuffing chips in his mouth, Naruto suddenly blows a shower of food out over the sidewalk as he chokes, struggling to breathe. “S...she w-what?”

“Yeah. Just straight up asked me.”

“Well...what did you say?”

“I said sure. We haven’t had any time yet with practice and homework, but we’re thinking maybe this weekend.”

Blues blink, regarding his friend with a furrowed brow. “...okay. So...why’re you so glum if you’ve got a date? Got cold feet or somethin’?”

“No! No, that’s not it. I just…” He sighs, burying his face in his hands. “...look. I’ve liked Hinata for a long time. For like...all of high school.”

“Whoa...I had no idea.”

“Cuz I didn’t want anyone to know. She’s liked you for so long, I just...didn’t want to say anything. And now I might actually have, like...a chance. But…”

“But what?”

“But I dunno what’s gonna happen when we graduate! We haven’t talked about Summer plans, or college, or...anything.”

“Well, I mean...you haven’t even been on a date yet. Kinda jumpin’ the gun, aren’t ya?” When Sasuke doesn’t reply, Naruto hesitates. “...you like her that much…?”

“...yeah.”

“...well shit.” Setting his snack aside, Naruto goes quiet, thinking. “...you sure she’s not, uh...y’know…”

“...what?”

“It’s just...I mean, you said it yourself, right? She’s been on my tail for a long time! I just...don’t want you chasing someone who’s just...settling for you.”

At that, Sasuke’s expression quickly hardens. “No. That’s not how it is.”

“...but -?”

“Hinata’s not like that. She’s better than that! If she didn’t think this would work, she wouldn’t have asked me. She’s not settling -!”

“Okay, okay! I just...was worried, that’s all. You’re my best friend, dude. I wanna be sure you’re only using your time on someone who deserves you.”

“...I’m not worried about that.”

“...all right. Well…” The blond sighs, rubbing the back of his head in thought. “...maybe you can talk to her when you get together. Just kinda, y’know...casually bring it up. See what she says. I dunno if she’d be kinda freaked out if you suddenly started planning out your college choice because of her when you’re both still new to this, right?”

“Yeah, that’s what I’m afraid of. You’re right, I’ll just...ease into it. Try to be nonchalant. See how it goes from there.”

After a pause, Naruto can’t help a grin and a snicker. At Sasuke’s questioning glance, he admits, “Never thought it’d be you comin’ to me for dating advice, huh?”

Sasuke’s face sours. “Hey, I didn’t come to you, you just showed up! And I...needed to vent. Don’t get it twisted.”

“Yeah, yeah...well, I bet it’ll be fine. If Hinata’s as good of a person as you seem to think she is, then you’ve got nothin’ to worry about. Have your date, test the waters, and see how it goes. Just don’t start talkin’ about moving in together and havin’ kids, okay?”

“As if!” Sasuke rebukes, going a bit red in the face.

The pair then fall into a thoughtful silence.

“So...you ever ask Sakura out?”

“Yeah, like a thousand times!”

“I mean recently.”

Sipping his soda and pouting, Naruto mumbles, “...I was gonna wait until we win the game tomorrow. Y’know, since we’ll be goin’ to state that way. Maybe it’ll, I dunno...help change her mind.”

“...well I hope she says yes.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. You’ve liked her a long time, man. Maybe we’ll both have better luck this time around.”

Naruto blinks. “...it’d be nice.”

“...well, speaking off, I better get home,” Sasuke then offers, hopping off the wall. “I gotta get my homework done and get to bed early so I’m not tired for the game.”

“Hey, you wanna do mine, too?”

“Yeah, right. Just go home and do it! There’s only a few more weeks left, you can tough it out, dude.”

The blond pouts. “Yeah, yeah...see ya tomorrow.”

“Later.” Hands in his pockets, Sasuke makes his way around to the parking lot, mind still abuzz with what-ifs. Maddening, he knows...but he just can’t help it.

...Hinata’s a nice person. He’s sure she’ll take it well. He’s just, well...a little afraid. This is his first time opening up like this, after all. He wants to do it right...and hopefully not have to deal with the fallout of things going south.

...he has a plan. Now to just...execute it.

                                                           .oOo.

     (This is a sequel to days 149, 168, 183, and 271!)      More sportsverse! Not...very much sports in this one, or even Hinata, but it's more of a like...transitional piece.      I wanna say I've tackled this notion (Hinata 'settling' for Sasuke) before, but it was in the canon AU verse I write, so...different context, lol - and Sasuke's not about to stand for it here, either. I don't think Naruto means anything by it, he just wants to be sure Sasuke's feelings aren't one-sided. He's just trying to be a bro!      Buuut, on that note, I reallllly need some sleep. I'm still two days behind and likely will be for...quite some time. At least through October with my other fanfic challenge going on. And irl has been...rough ^^; So thank you guys for your patience. One way or another, we'll make it to the end of the year, I promise! Some might just...be a lil late. We'll see~ But either way, thanks for reading!

[lovemesomerafael]

El Amor Todo Lo Puede          Chapter 56:  Home

Source:  @peter-stone

Chapters 1-55

Laura knocked quietly on the door of Lucia’s apartment in the Bronx, feeling a strange mixture of excitement and sadness.  They had kept in touch, of course, for the two years Laura had been away, although after those first, hellish months, they hadn’t spoken quite as often.  Laura fully expected that they would spend time during this visit crying over their mutual loss, and she didn’t dread that. In fact, she and Lucia hadn’t been able to hug while they cried in all the time Laura had been gone.  Since the crying part was probably inevitable, Laura thought it would be nice to be able to put her arms around Rafael’s mother while they shared their pain.  

Lucia had tried to understand Laura’s need to run away.  At first, she had been confused and a bit hurt that Laura wouldn’t be in New York, where they could comfort one another.  Over the two weeks after Rafi’s death, however, as they had worked feverishly together to do all the horrible tasks that have to be done when someone dies, Lucia had seen in Laura a fear that she herself didn’t feel.  Laura was not only grieving the past, she was also terrified of the future.  Lucia wasn’t. Partly, the difference was that Laura was young, and had to figure out who to be, now that she had been left without the partner she’d chosen to spend her life with.  Rafael’s death had fundamentally changed who Laura was.  That wasn’t true for Lucia.  Losing her child, adult though he had been, didn’t change Lucia’s identity as his mother.  The other difference was that having another child wasn’t an option for Lucia, so she didn’t have to find the courage to try again.  

Over the past two years, something had happened that neither of them had expected.  As much as they had liked being mother- and daughter-in-law, they found that they also enjoyed being friends.  Lucia still felt motherly toward Laura, who also loved Lucia like a second mother.  But helping one another through their greatest loss had also forged a deep, lasting friendship between them as women.  Rafael was always there, between them, a shared love that united them.  But they found that, slowly and in stages, their conversations branched out to involve the rest of their lives, as well.  It was a lovely connection that allowed them to keep Rafael close – the two women who had loved him the most – and also allowed each of them to enjoy the other for her own sake.

When Lucia opened the door, she and Laura hugged (and cried) for a very long time before Laura even crossed the threshold.

 *************

Dinner at Amanda’s had started at breakfast time.  Laura wanted to spend as much time as possible with her friends from SVU, so they’d arranged to meet at the zoo in Central Park, where the kids could play while the parents talked.  Laura was shocked by how much they’d grown; both Fin’s grandson, Jaden, and Amanda’s daughter, Billie, were talking already.  They weren’t speaking full sentences, but they were certainly able to make their needs known.  Amanda’s daughter Jessie and Olivia’s son Noah both had vague memories that they had an “Aunt Lala”, but had really been too young to remember Laura.  It was great fun to get re-acquainted with them, and to discover Jaden’s and Billie’s personalities, made easier by the fact that Sonny Carisi was, by far, the kids’ favorite person and knew everything about them.   As soon as they saw that Sonny liked Laura, they decided to like her, too.  

While the older kids ran around like maniacs and the littler ones alternated between mania and meltdowns, the adults caught up.  Laura had cried as soon as she saw Fin, which she’d known she would.  He tried to play it cool, but the tightness of his hug and the amount of time it lasted told her he was just as glad to see her.

“Any idea what you’re gonna do when you get back to Chicago?”  He asked.

“I have a few leads.  I really loved the work I did for the feds; I might want to do something with computer crimes.  Or maybe I’ll go to the dark side and make a mint working in cybersecurity.  Regular hours, no one shoots at me…”

“Yeah, but you’d never get to go off on anyone.  Remember Reginald Skoggs?  You love that shit,”  Fin laughed.

“Oh, man, I haven’t thought about him in years.  But you’re right, that was fun.  Remember I had to change my clothes before Barba saw all the blood?”  

Fin laughed at that, too, and Laura noticed that the whole group seemed to relax a little, knowing that it was all right to mention Rafael’s name.  

“What I remember is you still owe me fifty bucks for not tellin’ Barba what you did.”  

Laura feigned a blank look.  “I don’t remember that.”

“Yeah, sure you don’t.”  Fin threw an arm around her neck and gave her a rough hug.  “Punk-ass kid.”  

All morning and afternoon, the SVU detectives shared stories of cases they’d worked and listened as Laura told them what she’d been doing.  Laura wanted to hear every story about the kids.  They had so much to talk about that it was actually after lunch by the time the conversation neared the subject of Rafael’s murder.

Olivia moved so that she was walking next to Laura while they headed toward the Polar Circle, where the penguins – the kids’ favorite - lived.  

“I thought we’d get to see you for Randolph’s trial.  I wasn’t surprised to see him plead out, but I was sorry to miss out on a visit from you.”  

“Thanks, Lieu. I knew he’d take a plea.  McCoy was going to bury him no matter what, so I think he just figured he’d save himself the trouble.  For a sweet man, Jack McCoy can be a scary SOB when he’s crossed.”

“Yes, he can,” Olivia agreed.  

“Anyway, it was better that way.  I really wasn’t ready to come back until pretty recently.  In fact, I might have stayed longer, except…”

“Yeah, I heard. You know, until Rollins told me the whole story, I just thought you and Stone were oddly close.”  

“And you were right about that,” Laura laughed.  

While Jaden and Billie napped hard in their strollers, Fin sat with them and napped a little, too. Liv and Amanda kept a close eye on Jessie and Noah, and Laura and Carisi stood leaning on poured concrete rocks, watching the penguins.  

“So I’m looking at all these kinds of penguins, particularly the macaroni penguin, which is really the coolest of penguinkind, and I’m thinkin’ that right there is evidence that God has a sense of humor.”

“Hmmmm. Deep, Carisi.  I don’t disagree, but I’m thinking whoever named them macaroni penguins gets an honorable mention.”

“Yeah, I could go there,” Sonny shrugged.  “And since you didn’t throw me over these rocks into the water, I hope that means that maybe you and God have made up a little?”  

Laura thought for a minute.  “There was this priest in Stockholm, Father Piär. He helped.  Probably not as much as you, but he did OK.”  She bumped Carisi fondly with her shoulder.  

“I don’t know that I helped any, but thanks.”

“Sure you did.  And I appreciate it.  I owe you.” Laura didn’t want the day to turn maudlin, so she changed the subject.  “So I noticed in your emails, you never mentioned any dates.  You didn’t become a monk or something, did you?”  

“Nah,” Sonny blushed.  “I just like to play things close to the vest, y’know?”

“Well, don’t. Tell me.  I want to know you’re happy.”

The smile on Sonny’s face, and the crinkles around his bright blue eyes told Laura that he would never want for romantic companionship for long.  “There’s no one special right now, but…  I’ve kinda been thinkin’ I’m getting a little old for dates.  Dean got married, you know.”

“I hadn’t heard that!”

“Yeah, married a surgeon.  They’re in L.A. now.  Anyway, I’ve been thinking I might be in the market for someone, you know, more permanent.”

“Any candidates?”

“Not right now. But who knows?”

“Just don’t get serious about anyone until I get to check them out.  Don’t rely solely on Amanda’s judgment.”

“If I have to wait until Amanda approves someone, I might as well hang it up right now.”

The rest of the afternoon went on like that, everyone enjoying the day and Laura getting a chance to talk one-on-one with each of them.

At dinner, there was plenty of wine and entirely too much food.  Sonny made something no one could pronounce, but it was so good everyone ate until they couldn’t possibly take one more bite.  Lucia joined them, and they all enjoyed themselves.  To Laura, it felt as though she’d never been away, which was just a little bittersweet, because it meant she kept expecting Rafael to walk in at any time.  

There was a sweet moment when Olivia was telling a story about an argument she and Rafael had, and Noah asked, “Is Rafael the same as Uncle Rafa?”  

Olivia told him that he was.

“I ‘member him,” Noah said.  “He used to sing the pirate song.”  

As much as Laura had needed to leave New York to escape the constant reminders of Rafael, it was lovely, now that she could, to be able to talk about him with people who had known and loved him.  There were a hundred stories about funny, biting comments he had made, demonstrations of his undeniable abilities, and his courtroom coups.  Lucia told some hilarious, adorable stories about him as a child that he would never have allowed her to tell, had he been there.  They all laughed, and shed a few tears, and toasted his memory.  The entire day was as special as any of them had hoped, and it was a perfect way for Laura to acknowledge the life she had loved in New York before she went on to begin a new life back in Chicago.

Amanda waited with Laura and Lucia at the curb for their taxi back to the Bronx.  She and Laura had exchanged many hugs throughout the day, but it still didn’t feel like enough.  They sat, side by side on Amanda’s stoop, with Amanda’s arm around Laura’s shoulder.

“Just remember, you need me to shoot Stone, I can make it look like an accident.”

“I thought it was Rafael you offered to shoot.”

“It was, but you never took me up on it, so I still owe you.  But I’m kinda hopin’ you don’t ever need me to shoot Stone, either.  ‘Cuz you look happy.  And I like seein’ that.”

“Me, too.”

“You take care of yourself, Parker.  You know you always have a home here, if you want it.”

They hugged yet again, both smiling, and Amanda pulled Lucia into the hug with them.

**********

The flight from New York to Chicago had seemed very short after the flight from Stockholm. And now, Laura was home.  She smiled even as tears spilled over, looking out the window of the airplane at the familiar landscape.  

She walked through the concourse toward Baggage Claim.  She reached the main terminal, passed the security checkpoint, and descended the stairs toward the row of baggage carousels, some surrounded by people and spitting out luggage which then circled slowly, some still and silent.  She idly looked out over the scene as she walked down the stairs.

She froze on the last step, her heart doing some sort of somersault in her chest and a large swarm of butterflies taking sudden flight in her stomach.  She whispered an involuntary, "Peter."

She stood, unmoving, staring at the tall, beautiful man standing near the baggage carousel for her flight.  As always, his muscular, athletic build and his square, masculine jaw stirred a deep longing in her.  She stared almost helplessly at him, just as she had done that day years before, when she saw him in the lobby at District 21, waiting for an appointment with Sergeant Voight.  She realized with a surge of love that the pain of missing Peter was over.  She was home now, with him, and there was no longer anything to keep them apart.

His hair was longer than it had been when she’d last seen him.  It looked so good she instantly wanted to run her hands through it. Had he let it grow for her, knowing she liked it that way?  Only when he looked up at her, perhaps sensing her staring at him, did Laura take the last stair and begin to move through the crowd toward him as his face broke into a wide smile.

They didn’t say anything at first as they came face to face, just took a moment to smiled at one another before they wrapped their arms around each other in a long, contented embrace.  People looked at them, some annoyed at these fools locked in a marathon hug in the middle of baggage claim, some grinning shyly at the apparently very happy reunion. Peter and Laura ignored them all. Somewhere in the middle of their embrace, they began to share whispered “I love you’s” among heartfelt endearments.

There were plenty of kisses and laughing as they collected Laura’s luggage and walked, talking animatedly, out to Peter’s car.  With so much to carry - suitcases, Laura’s guitar, her carry-on - they hadn’t been able to hold hands or put arms around each other as they walked, and with each step, Laura found herself more aware of wanting to touch Peter.  She noticed again his hair, just a bit shaggy, and the way it made her think of him in bed.  She watched the sexy way he walked, so athletic and confident, legs wide and striding quickly.  As Peter stored the luggage in the back of a new SUV he’d purchased at some point after he’d returned from New York, Laura stood close to him, just wanting to be near him and eager to have her arms around him again.  

He slammed the gate down and pulled her to him.  As he leaned down to press his lips to hers, she breathed in his scent: a clean, masculine smell of soap and a little bit of musky cologne highlighting a warmer, savory essence that Laura thought of as just plain man.  She reached up, sliding one hand into the hair at the back of his head and using the other to hold him close.  As their mouths met in heated haste, Peter’s arms encircling Laura completely, she felt herself pressed against the back of the vehicle.  She moved her legs to more fully melt their bodies together, feeling lust overcoming her sense of anything beyond Peter. He felt warm and firm, large and muscular, the beginnings of his erection evident as he moved against her.

He broke the kiss when they started to lose control of the sounds being drawn from them and the wantonness of their hip movements.  

“Get in the car,” he growled, and they quickly separated to slide into their seats.  Before even thinking about putting on seat belts, they turned to each other and their mouths met once again for the kind of kisses they really wanted, but couldn’t indulge in publicly.  Their intimate caresses became quickly more serious, more heated, and soon they were both moaning as Peter’s tongue teased Laura’s. Minutes later, Laura slid a hand up the inside of Peter’s thigh.  

He took her hand from his leg, lifting it to his lips and kissing her fingers, chuckling.  “You missed me.”

“I missed you like crazy.  And I want you.  Let me…”

“Not here.”

“Please?  We could get in the back…”

“I am not going to have sex with you in an airport parking garage,” Peter said, a little more gruffly than he meant to, because he was having some trouble resisting her suggestion in his current agitated state.

“It wouldn’t be the first time.  I think it was even this garage.  Remember when you went -“

“That was…  We were in our twenties then.”  He consciously tried to slow his breathing.

“And?  What are you, a grown-up now?”  Laura leaned in and began kissing Peter’s neck, slipping her hand from his and reaching toward his crotch.  “Come on.  I love you, and I’ve been thinking about you nonstop.  Let me touch you…” she purred.

“Stop,” he said, laughing but taking her hand again.  “I mean it.  You can do anything you want to me when we get home.  Now behave.”

She moved back into her seat, pretending to be grumpy as she fastened her seat belt.  “Behave.  Since when have I ever behaved?”  

“Just be patient. I’ll make it worth your while.”  Peter gave her a look that did nothing to cool her arousal.  “I promise.”

Seeing that he wasn’t going to relent, Laura settled into her seat, smiling contentedly. “It’s good to be home.”

“It’s good to have you home,” Peter agreed, reaching for her hand and intertwining his fingers with hers.  

The city looked beautiful to Laura, even in the dreariness of late fall.  There was a weak sunlight through breaks in the clouds, and there were still some trees with bright fall foliage here and there. Mostly, the city looked good to her because she had been homesick.  She noticed a new building going up on the downtown skyline and pointed it out to Peter, asking where, exactly, it was.  When he told her, she scrunched up her eyebrows.  “Wait, doesn’t that mean… didn’t you miss your exit?  I thought you lived in the Fulton River District.”

“I did,” he responded, looking at the road.  “I moved.”

“You moved? You didn’t tell me you moved.  When did you move?”

“A few months ago. Didn’t I tell you?”

“No.  How do you move, and not tell me?”

“I must’ve forgot. I told you, I’ve been crazy busy these last few months.”

Laura frowned. This was strange.  Moving is not something you forget to mention.  “Where do you live now?”

“Wilmette.”

“Wilmette!  You do not.”

Peter smiled and chuckled a little, but kept his eyes on the road.  “I do, actually.  You’ll see.”

“Peter, you… that’s… I can’t believe you moved to Wilmette and didn’t tell me.”

“I thought you liked Wilmette?”

“I do.  We both do.  Remember, we used to talk about living there someday.  That’s why I can’t believe you didn’t tell me.”

“I’m sorry, Sunshine.  Really.  I guess I thought I had.”  He lifted her hand from the console where their clasped hands had been resting and kissed it for about the hundredth time since they’d left O’Hare.

Laura shrugged slightly, but she was still uneasy.  He had told her that he’d been extremely busy over the months since he’d visited her in Stockholm, and with all that had happened between them, maybe he really had forgotten. But it still struck her as a very strange thing not to mention.

Several miles later, Peter exited the freeway and drove through the Village of Wilmette, a clean, leafy, cute midwestern town with lots of small shops and other businesses lining the streets.  He turned into a neighborhood of pretty houses, many of them brick, all set back from the street behind well-maintained front lawns with trees and shrubs.  Most of the houses had flower gardens up next to their foundations, although this late in the year there weren’t any flowers blooming.  He turned into an idyllic, peaceful street and began to slow down.

“You’re messing with me,” she said.  “You bought a house?”

“Yeah,” he said, pulling over against the curb.  “We’re here.”  

The house he pointed to was two a story brick, with copper awnings covered with verdigris over bay windows, one on either side of a rounded front door that sat at the top of a set of two steps.  There was a little patio in front of the door with wrought iron railings on either side. There was a chimney to one side, and it looked like there was another chimney at the back.  Peter got out of the car and came around to open Laura’s door as she simply sat and stared.

“Do you like it?”  He asked, a sweet, expectant smile on his face that almost hid a glint of mischief in his eyes.  

Laura stepped out onto the curb and stood, looking at the charming house.  “You didn’t forget to tell me you bought a house.”

He shrugged, pleased with her reaction.  “Maybe not. Maybe I wanted it to be a surprise.”

“Peter, this is your house?  It’s beautiful!  It’s perfect! You really live here?”

“Got the mortgage to prove it,” he said, taking her hand.  “C’mon.  I want to show it to you.  We’ll get the luggage later.”  

When they reached the door, he opened it and then turned to her and lifted her up with one arm behind her back and one behind her legs.  

“What are you doing?”

“I’m carrying you over the threshold.”

All Laura could think to do was laugh.  This was… bizarre.  Unreal.

They stood in a small foyer with a flagstone floor, a little table with a lamp on it just inside.  Something about the table or the lamp, or maybe both, looked familiar to her, but she was so curious to see Peter’s house that she didn’t give it much thought.  The foyer gave onto a short hallway.

The first room they came to was a formal living room with a couch and some wingback chairs arranged around a fireplace.  There was something about the room that seemed…  Then she noticed the painting of a cottage in the English countryside over the fireplace. 

“I have that same painting,” she said, her voice a little unsure.  “I’ve never noticed that in your apartments, did you just get it?”

“Sort of.  Let me show you the rest of the house.”

He led her past the living room to the end of the short hall, which opened onto a large, sunny great room at the back of the house.  The room had a pleasant kitchen separated by a span of granite countertop from a family area with another fireplace.  Laura was astounded, her head swimming at the surprise of Peter owning a house in Wilmette, and the perfectness of the house itself.  

“Oh, Peter, this is great!  It’s… I love it!  Is this actually a wood-burning fireplace?”

“Yep.”  

Again, Laura had an odd feeling about the room.  It seemed like she’d been there before. 

“This is so weird.  I’m having the weirdest sense of déjà vu.  I know I’ve never been here before…  Holy shit, I know what it is!”

She turned to him to find him grinning like a fool. 

“Peter, your house is just like the one we used to talk about.  Remember?  When we lived in that fifth-floor walk-up in Evanston.  Now all you need is a dog named Marshall.”

Peter, now actually laughing, cocked his head toward a sliding glass door that led from the kitchen out to a patio.  “Back yard.” 

Laura felt herself go numb.  Her eyes got big and she just stood where she was, a confused expression on her face.  Her voice was shaky as she asked, “What’s going on?”

Peter went to the door and opened it.  “Come on.  Meet Marshall.”

She almost stumbled as she moved, uncertain and overwhelmed, over to him.  He put an arm around her back, enjoying every second of her reaction, but a little worried this might all be a bit too much.  He led her out onto the wooden patio, which had two sets of steps down to a small back yard shielded from any neighbors by high hedges.  She noticed movement to one side, and her eyes fixed on a red doghouse from which a Yellow Labrador Retriever puppy was sleepily emerging.  The puppy saw Peter and ran to the stairs, a little small yet to climb them easily. 

“Oh, look at you!  You’re so cute!”  Laura hurried over to pick up the puppy, who immediately began to lick all over her face.  She looked at Peter, eyes still wide, confusion and disbelief still very much evident.  “How old is he?”

“She is about three months old.”

“You named a girl puppy Thurgood Marshall?”

“I had to.  That’s the name we picked out.”

“I… what?”

Laura had just enough presence of mind to notice that Peter’s smile was heartrendingly handsome.  He was looking at her, holding the puppy, as though he was a child on Christmas morning catching his first sight of what Santa had brought.

“C’mon, let’s sit here for a minute.”  He sat her down on the stairs that led from the deck to the yard and settled next to her, their legs touching for their full lengths and his arm around her.  

“You OK?”  He chuckled.

“I…  You bought a house.”  She looked up at him just as the shocked, confused look on her face was replaced by something else.  “That picture.”

“Hmmmm?”  He asked, grinning again.

“That’s mine, isn’t it?”

“It was.  Now it’s ours.”

“Did you…?  What did you do?”

“We moved you in.  Everything you had in storage, we moved in here.  This is your house.  Well, our house.”  The grin became a radiant smile.

“Our house.”

“That’s right.  You live here.  With me.”

Peter realized he should have found a way to record this moment.  Her face was registering every emotion that tumbled through her head. He would have liked to be able to watch it again and again, for the rest of his life.  

“But… Who’s ‘we’?  Who helped you move everything in?”

“Do you really have to ask that question?  I could never have finished getting everything ready for you if your whole family hadn’t helped.”

“Our family.”

“Our family.”

“I don’t know what to do.  I don’t know what to say.  Peter, this is…”  She reached for him.  “I’ve been telling you for twenty years that I love you, but I’ve never loved you like I do now.  And not just because you bought me a house.  I don’t know how to say a bigger I love you, but… I love you bigger!  They don’t have a word for how I feel about you.  So how am I supposed to tell you?”  Laura’s eyes were overflowing with tears as she laughed into Peter’s shoulder.

“I know how,” he said quietly.

Marshall had been frolicking around their feet as they sat on the stair, and Peter reached out to her, taking hold of a little white ribbon tied to her collar, which Laura hadn’t really noticed.  He untied it and something that had been attached to it fell into his hand.  As he reached behind himself to take Laura’s left hand, she gasped. He pulled her hand to him and held a small gold band with a solitary diamond shining in the middle just off the end of her ring finger.

Laura laughed again through her tears and said, “Yes.  Yes, yes, YES!”

Peter laughed, too.  “Always so impatient.  I haven’t asked you yet.”

He took a deep breath, wanting to give this moment the seriousness it deserved.  As he looked into her eyes, he said, “I love you, Laura.  Will you marry me?  Will you make a family with me?  Be the mother of my children?” 

“Yes,” she whispered, suddenly unable to speak. 

She watched as he slipped the ring onto her finger.  “Peter,” she gasped, “Is this…  This is…  This is our ring.  From before.”

“Yeah, I know.  We’ll get a real one, I just needed one to propose with.”

“We will not get a real one,” she cried, suddenly finding her voice as she threw her arms around him again.  “This is the real one.  You kept this ring, all these years…  You will have to pry this ring off my finger.”

For the next several minutes, Marshall became increasingly excited because Peter and Laura were paying no attention to her.  They were too focused on each other, laughing, hugging, kissing, and telling each other over and over how much they loved each other.

“Peter, stop.  I can’t!  This is too much.  I’m gonna explode or have some sort of neurological event from happiness overload…”  Laura laughed breathlessly.  “How many of my dreams are you planning to make come true?

“All of them,” he answered.  “Didn’t I tell you?”