#darkish!joel miller

[toxicanonymity]

Silence can never be bought, only rented

Part 1 of 6, 1.3k | dbf!Joel x f!eader | NSFW 18+

Next: PART 2 / Story Master List

SUMMARY: You come home from campus one weekend and catch your dad’s friend Joel in bed with your stepmother. 

WARNINGS: I8+ Joel PiV w/ someone else (before you're involved at all). Accidental voyeurism, exhibitionism by opportunity. Joel mentally cucks her w/ you.

It’s dark, but you still catch quite an eyeful when you approach the bedroom and the door is wide open.  They’re doing it doggy style on the bed,  facing the window.  In full view of the door.  Joel is buck naked.  He’s always been burly, but you still didn’t quite imagine what was under his flannels all these years.   He scowls and grunts as his massive hands hold onto her hips and his pale asscheeks flex powerfully.  

Your dad is leading a special military training exercise in an undisclosed location.  He always tells you to call Joel if you need anything while he’s away.  He knows how you feel about your stepmom.  She’s only 10 years older than you and got together with your dad when she was your age.  Your dad is no angel, but you’re protective of him, and you’ve had your suspicions about his young bride.   So when you come home that night and Joel’s truck is in the driveway, you deliberately park in front of the neighbor’s yard and enter your house very quietly.  Luckily for you, Joel’s hearing is bad, but you sneak around anyway. You can hear the mattress and the slap of skin down the hall.  Then, your stepmother makes the porniest moan, making you gag. 

When your shadow slowly approaches in the moonlight, he looks toward the bedroom door and does a double take.   You flash your eyebrows but don’t make a peep.   And when he sees you, he doesn’t stop.  He keeps railing her.   He slows down, and she whines.  

Then, he makes eye contact with you, looks you up and down, and starts fucking her harder.  God, what a pervert.   Not to be intimidated, you stand there and watch him finish.  You lean against the doorframe, crossing your arms and ankles, taking in every detail.  At least he’s wearing a rubber.   Before he comes, he pulls almost all the way out and looks down at himself, then back up at you, almost like he wants you to know he’s hung.  He slams her back on his cock with a grunt and she moans as he empties his balls, his eyes still locked on yours.  

-

You slink outside and sit in your car for a minute, thinking.  You park in front of your house as if you’re just arriving.  You leave a note on Joel’s truck, then come in through the front door, noisily.  

Then you call, “Uncle Joel? Are you here?”  You smile to yourself and wait.  You never call him that, but it’s how your dad always used to refer to him.  Then you add, “I thought you were gonna meet me there. . .”

“Just a sec,” he yells. 

You overhear your stepmom ask him, “You were going to what?” 

Joel says something inaudible. 

“Meet her where?”

Oh, this is going to be fun.  You grab a drink from the fridge and sit down at the kitchen table while they both come downstairs.  You greet him with a kiss on the cheek.  

“The toilet upstairs wasn’t working,” your stepmom says, still disheveled and proud of her lie.  

You nod and smile. “Yeah, Dad warned me,” you lie.  She seems to think she lucked out with a coincidence.  She’s that dumb.  

“Are you done?” you ask Joel. 

“Uh,” he pauses in thought. 

“Fixing the toilet,” you say.  

“Yeah, good to go,” he says with a glance toward her. 

“Thanks,” you beam.  “Dad will be happy.”   

You get up and give him a big hug, then hold eye contact as you break away.  

Your stepmom looks back and forth between the two of you.  

“Shall we?” you ask him.  

“Um, yeah,” he shoves his hands in his pockets and looks at her nervously as he grabs his keys from the key hook.  “Let me know if it gives you any more trouble,” he says to her.   She looks so pissed, you have to suppress your smirk.  

You need to think this over.  You aren’t ready to talk to Joel.  On your way out, you text your high school friend about staying at her place for the night since you already drove all the way here.  

-

Joel jogs to your car to catch up with you.  His cheeks are still flushed.  

“Where are we going?” he asks stupidly. 

You laugh. 

“Don’t you wanna talk?” he adds, hovering near your driver’s side door as you unlock it.   He looks somewhere between annoyed and bemused, which pisses you off. He should be afraid for you to tell your dad.  

You close your door, stand against the car, and grab both sides of his unbuttoned flannel shirt, assuming your stepmom is still watching.  You pull him into you, then wrap your arms around his waist until you feel him harden against your jeans and he inhales your hair deeply, sending a warm rush to your core.  

Then, you put your arms around his neck, and his hands loosely graze your waist. 

You say softly in his ear, “Go home, Joel.” 

You get in your car and look up at the house just in time to see your stepmom’s silhouette retreat from the front window. 

Joel runs his hands through his hair and walks to his truck.  

He takes your note off the window and opens it: You’re sick.   

-

You go to your friend’s house and watch horror movies.  She goes to community college and lives in her parents’ basement.  She’s so happy to see you, she wishes you would come home more.  You can stay with her any time.  

Joel calls you and you send it to voicemail.  He texts you, too.  He says he’s done with her, doesn’t care, that he’ll break it off tomorrow.  You don’t answer.  

You have a lot of thoughts and feelings, but you keep coming back to the hardness in his jeans pressing against you.  You don’t want to think about it.  He’s been fucking your stepmother and that’s gross.  You try to put it out of your mind, but the feeling stays between your legs.  You pinch your eyes shut and shake your head, you just see his eyes roving you hungrily as he fucks her.  Sick.  Really sick.  And yet, your panties are so moist.

-

You decide to go back home the next day to see if you can tell whether Joel has really broken it off.  Your stepmother says it’s such a nice surprise to see you.  You skeptically ask why it’s a surprise, since she knows you’re in town.  She shrugs and asks if you want something to eat.  She’s looking at you differently.  She keeps looking at you up and down.  

You return the look and ask, “What?”

She asks if you had a nice time last night. 

“Yeah, we did . . . did you?” 

She smiles and nods,  “Yeah.” 

She mentions the toilet is acting up again and you silently seethe. He not only hasn’t broken it off, but he’s coming over?  There’s almost something smug about the way she says it, too.  You offer to look at the toilet yourself.  She says Joel is already on his way. 

His truck pulls up, then your phone dings.

Joel:  Wanna give us some privacy?

You:  I dunno, what are you gonna do with it? 

Joel: I told you, I’m ending it.  

You: Ever heard of a phone call? 

Your phone keeps dinging and you ignore it.  

“That must be him,” she says.  She calls him and asks him if he’s there.  

He comes in and looks salty.  She takes his jacket.  

“Actually, I’m gonna borrow this,” you say on impulse and grab it from her on your way out.  “I’ll give it back later,” you tell him, looking over your shoulder. 

Why does he wear his jeans so tight, you wonder.  

You text him from your car, “I’m not leaving the neighborhood,” but then you do. You go back to your friend’s house.  

He calls you 15 minutes later and you ignore it.  He texts you, and you ignore it.  You let him squirm.

You decide you'll keep his jacket and take it back to campus with you.

-

PART 2

master list

[aurorawritestoescape]

A STEP INTO HELL

Stepdad!Joel Miller x f!reader || Word count: 3k

Summary: after you move into his house, Joel finds himself possessed by the idea of having you. Trying to quench his lustful thirst he decides to get his hands on your nudes. To his surprise he finds something even better.

Tw: 18+ mdni, smut, step-cest, Joel’s pov, dub con but reader’s into it, legal age gap, dark!Joel, perv!Joel, obsessed!joel, darkish!reader, unprotected piv/dvp (wrap it up), sex toy usage, blackmail, sex audio recording, creampie, degradation, slutshaming, praise kink, daddy kink, mention of f/m masturbation/f!oral/anal/food play, slapping (1), cum eating, swearing.

A/n: huge thank you to @megangovier for this ask and the idea!💖 I had a blast working on this story. Hope you’ll like it, lovely!🌸 Kisses to @milla-frenchy for beta-ing😘 Dividers by @/enchanthings and @/saradika-graphics 💕

MASTERLIST || more stepdad Joel || more step family naughtiness

Joel wasn’t a good man. He wasn’t moral, ethical or rational. The only thing Joel seemed to be recently was horny. Horny for his stepdaughter.

It wasn’t a gradual obsession. Not at all. It took over him suddenly and overwhelmingly. You had lived with your dad after your parents’ divorce, but then moved into Joel’s house to stay closer to your college. He had barely seen you before and then you were in his house all the fucking time.

Was his attraction out of the blue? Not really. You were a hot young woman. Every man’s dream. But the maddening desire took Joel by surprise. Like a tsunami it put his life upside down, taking away any sense he might have had before. The lust for you was like a poison, coursing through his veins, pumping blood to his big cock more often than it was expected for a man of his age.

In hopes of getting rid of the toxic passion, Joel jerked off regularly like a horny teenager. He watched tons of porn, choosing the ones with women that looked like you. To his distress, it seemed to entice him even more. Like a dog he couldn’t stop salivating every time he saw you.

Joel would often get lost in his thoughts at the breakfast table, sitting right in front of you and thinking about the shape of your pussy. ‘Did you have a little clit hidden behind your lips or could he see it right away if he took your shorts and panties off at that moment? Did you shave your cunt or could he tug you lightly by your soft pubes?’ He’d be happy with anything, a pussy was a pussy, especially if it belonged to a sweet thing like you. He couldn’t help but daydream of eating you out on the table right next to the pancakes your mother had made, your sweet pussy served with maple syrup on top, or melted butter all over your folds. He’d slurp it happily with your slick and cum and chase it with his black coffee. Breakfast of champions!

Joel ground his teeth. He had to keep himself from acting on his desires. Not because of your mom, fuck that nagging bitch! His dick barely reacted to her anymore. Divorce was what really terrified Joel. He’d hate to deal with all of that— too much paperwork, too much hustle. That was the last thing Joel needed.

The first thing was you. After a month of pumping his cock after every encounter with his stepdaughter, Joel got really frustrated and decided to act. He worked out a plan. Surely you had some juicy selfies on your laptop, he thought, so one day he knocked on your bedroom door with a secret motive to get his big paws on them.

You sweet voice let him in.

Joel stepped into your bedroom, his brows furrowed, the shoulders square, trying to intimidate you with his steel gaze and dominant tone so you’d agree faster.

“I need your laptop. Mine broke.”

You were lying on your bed with your phone in your hands, wearing your tiny shorts and a crop top and his dirty mind immediately drew him a picture of your naked body splayed and offered to him, head hanging off the side of the bed with his cock plunging in and out of your mouth. He could bet he’d be able to feel his shlong inside your tight throat. He’d probably come so fast like that and discharge his cum right into your belly. Bon appetite, baby!

“Hmm,” you hummed, blinking at him. You seemed hesitant and it made Joel even more excited—you definitely had something to hide. His jeans got strained with the might of his growing dick.

“C’mon. I’ll just pay the bills and give it back to ya.”

“Oh. I don’t know. Ehm—ok.”

As soon as you agreed Joel snatched the laptop off your desk and went to the master bedroom. His wife was working late that night so it was a perfect opportunity to find your nudes and jerk off to his heart's content.

Joel plunged on the bed and began his horny search. Let’s help Joel find his stepdaughter’s nudes!

Are they in this folder? — No!

That one? — Look better!

Here? — Fuck, no!

He was growing hopeless. No way a girl with an ass like yours wouldn’t want to have it in a photo. Your perfect tits were asking to be jerked off to. So where the hell were the goods?

He was searching everywhere until he stumbled upon a folder with a few tracks. He didn’t care about them at first but his thick finger accidentally double clicked one of them and to his surprise he heard his voice.

“No, wait— fuck—spread wider—yes—yeahhh.“

He increased the volume and his jaw dropped. Yes, he was sure now. It was his voice.

‘When was it recorded?’ Joel asked himself, listening to his groans. Suddenly it dawned on him. It was a couple of weeks ago when he was fucking his wife. His grunts and growls were the only audible noises, which was not surprising -your mother was always silent like a corpse when he was fucking her.

Yet Joel’s voice could be heard clearly. He listened to a few tracks and all of them were recordings of his voice— him talking to his clients on the phone, him discussing the last game with Tommy.

‘What a dirty slut!’ flashed in Joel’s mind. He wasn’t thinking anymore. With his cock already hard, Joel knew what to do and acted immediately.

He rushed back into your bedroom.

“Done?” you asked when he barged in. With your arm stretched, you were waiting for him to return your laptop, but he was still holding it.

“Fuckin’ slut.” Joel’s smirk was dark and triumphant.

Your face fell and you looked like you’d seen a ghost.

“Yeah, exactly! I found your little spy audios, baby! Why were you recording me and your mom having sex, little perv, huh?”

You pulled your knees to your chest, squeezing into yourself, and mumbled,

“I’m not— I—no—please—I wasn’t recording her.”

“Oh? But you recorded me! Wanted to hear your stepdad’s groans, dirty slut?”

You were quiet, with your gaze downcast, looking scared to death. That was exactly what Joel needed.

“Imma tell your mom.”

“No! No, please, Joel, no! I’m begging!”

“Unless—“, he mused.

“Yes! Anything! Please!”

Here we go. He had you where he wanted. Finally.

“Unless you become my fuck toy.”

You looked gobsmacked.

“What?”

“Don’t act shocked, babydoll. Bet you want it more than anythin’. What were you doin’ with those tracks, sweetie? Listenin’ and thinkin’ of our lord and savior? Fuck no! Were probably fuckin’ yourself silly, moanin’ my name. Your stepdad's name, little slut!”

He shook his head and tutted at you while you were shaking like a leaf.

”I’m givin’ you a way out, baby. But only if! If I can have my way in. In all your holes.”

“All?” Your voice was so small and trembling, it made his cock twitch.

“All, babydoll! I wanna fuck your mouth - yes, please, Joel! Wanna fuck your ass? you’ll let me! Pussy right after? Of course, sir! That’s what antibiotics are for.”

You sniffed loudly and burst into tears.

“Please Joel— I can’t—we shouldn’t!”

Joel smirked and walked to the bed, stopping right in front of you. He cupped your wet cheek and cooed, “I know we shouldn’t, babydoll. That’s why it’s so damn hot.”

You sniffed and leaned into his touch, your big teary eyes looking up at him.

Joel couldn’t believe his luck. The little slut was melting. He was going to have so much fun!

“Get undressed, sweetie. Let’s get right to it.”

Joel didn’t believe in God. But right at that moment he swore that someone above had blessed him. Or someone below for that matter. You were taking off your shorts, top and then panties, wiping tears off your pretty face with the back of your hand. He immediately snatched your underwear and shoved it in his jean pocket.

“On your back. Spread your legs. Let me see what daddy’s gonna play with.”

You widened your eyes at what he called himself but did what he told you. You lay down and slightly parted your bent legs.

“Don’t shake. I won’t hurt ya,” Joel growled, rolling your chair to the bed and making it squeak under his weight when he got comfortable ready to enjoy the view.

Your pussy was hotter than anything he’d seen or imagined and his cock was thumping hard in the confines of his jeans. Joel unzipped them and pulled his boxers down. Your glossy eyes immediately snapped to his bobbing stiff manhood.

“Yeah, sweetie, take a good look. Ya gonna learn every rim and vein of this dick pretty soon. Its taste too,” Joel added and shook it in his hand. He wasn’t leaking yet but when he pushed your legs wider apart and your folds opened up to his view, his slit began crying happy tears.

“Fuck, babydoll. She’s even better than I imagined. And believe me, I thought about your snatch a lot.”

Your breath hitched when Joel leaned closer and his thick fingers spread your lips.

“Look at this hole. Tight. We need to get ya ready first. This bad boy—“ he jiggled his cock again- “can damage you and we don’t want that, yeah?”

You shook your head and Joel’s hand glided over your mound, his digits slipped between your folds in a perverted examination.

“Ya have a dick?”

You were blinking up at him, confusion swimming in your blown out eyes.

“Rubber cock? Dildo? Jesus, ya slow.”

“Ohh… yeah,” you nodded and averted your eyes in shame.

“Aww, don’t act shy and shit. I think we’re past that, little slut.”

He got up with a smirk on his lips and, after following your line of vision, opened your nightstand drawer.

“Where is it? Ah!”

It wasn’t long until Joel found your toy - a pink dildo.

“Damn, sweetie, I see you’re not adventurous at all! Look!”

With a chuckle Joel lined the dildo up with his own cock which was longer and girthier than the toy and shot his brows up at you.

You closed your eyes, probably not believing what was happening in your bedroom, but then snapped them open when you felt a cold tip of the toy prod your tight hole.

”Joel! Lube!” you exclaimed, trying to push away the dildo. Your stepdad was looming over you, standing by the bed, his smile devilish.

“Of course. A little slut like you deserves the best lube. Daddy’s spit.”

He leaned down and gathered some saliva in his mouth before opening his lips and letting it drop right on your slit. You jerked.

”More?” Joel asked and not waiting for your response spit on it again, with force now. You moaned when a glob of liquid hit your clit and Joel’s fiery gaze found yours.

”You want it, yeah? That’s why you recorded me. Do you want me?”

He didn’t know why he was asking that. You were already lying in front of him on the bed, pussy out and ready to be fucked. But a possessive part of him wished for you to want him back.

You tried to avert your eyes but he leaned closer and took your cheeks between his fingers, keeping you facing him.

“Tell me!”

Your quiet, shaky ’yes’ rang loud in the bedroom and in his head. After your confession Joel’s flannel covered chest expanded with pride and triumph. He still got it. He had blackmailed you but he totally could have gotten you all by himself.

Drunk on the ego boost he kissed you with vigor and hunger, swallowing your mewls and whimpers. Then he ripped his mouth off and hovered over you, watching your eyes roll back when he pushed the dildo between your saliva-coated folds and inserted it into your hole. You moaned his name and Joel started leaking like a faucet.

He began fucking you with the toy, groaning and drinking in your sweet sounds.

“Ya love it, little slut? Bet you were dreaming of this. Your stepdad fuckin’ this pink cock into your hungry hole. Listenin’ to my voice.”

He leaned closer and growled right into your ear,

“Daddy’s here now and he’s gonna claim all your holes, sweetie.”

When he changed the angle of the dildo, you tilted your head back into the mattress with a loud whimper, biting your lower lip. Your pleasure drove Joel insane.

”You’ll be my fuckdoll in no time. I’ll train your pussy, your ass, your mouth. Ya gonna take me. Take me so good. Gonna tity-fuck you. Bathe you in my cum. You won’t need anything except my huge cock. And my voice. Give it to me now, baby! Come!”

“Daddy!” you cried out and your body began shaking and trembling under Joel. He didn’t stop moving the toy inside you until your limbs fell weakly on the bed and your face relaxed. Your eyes closed by themselves, body and mind spent after an emotional and physical climax.

Joel’s poor dick was engorged and leaking, demanding the warmth of your wet cunt. And he was absolutely sure that you were drenched.

He threw your legs wider apart with his knee and with a wolfish smirk stared at your clear juices sliding from under the pink cock, which was still sticking out of your cunt.

Suddenly Joel got an idea. His horny mind wanted nothing else but to spear you with his manhood. But he felt generous that day. You deserved so much more than just his cock!

Not tearing his dark gaze off you lying with your eyes closed and breathing fast, he took his jeans and flannel off. He was still wearing his white undershirt when his eager lips latched onto your exposed tits, his hot tongue swirled around your hardened nipples, one after the other. Joel’s hands were roaming your body, squeezing and pinching it lightly. Like a starving animal he couldn’t get enough of your submission, your skin, your curves and crevices. He was pulling little moans out of you and, with your eyelids still closed, you looked inebriated, drunk on his touch and your ecstasy, until Joel slightly slapped your cheek.

Your eyes fluttered open and you mewled, looking up at him, gaze foggy.

“My dick’s achin’, baby. Get ready to take it,” he warned and then got another bright idea. “Let’s record our first time. I’ll share it with you, baby, don’t worry. I know how much you love hearing daddy’s voice.” Joel laughed and took his phone out of his jeans lying on the floor.

“Smile, sweetie,” he commanded but you covered your face with your hands when he took a few nudes. It was good enough for him.

He started recording and threw the phone on the bed. Your sweet moans were enough for him too.

When Joel brough his tip to your already stuffed hole, your eyes widened.

“Joel, the toy—“

“Yeah, I know —I know — lemme do it.”

“Are you recording us?”

”Yeah, baby. Daddy needs something to jerk off to when you’re away.”

“Oh—ok, I guess.”

“Ya being such a good girl for me. Ain’t I lucky?”

“Joel, it won’t fit.”

“It will, babydoll. Tilt your hips a little. Yeah, damn. I’ll use my thumb to push it in. Jus’ a tip’ll do for today.”

“Ahhh—oh my god—your cock’s so big.”

“I know, right? But—Ya jus’ need to relax. Lemme stroke you—fuck, you’re wet, my hand’s soaked. Ya like it when I rub your clit like that?”

“Ahhhh—yeahh–yeahh—“

“Good little slut. It’s already in, baby. Lookit! My tip’s in.”

“Oh, fuck, Joel. I feel so full—ahhh.“

“Don’t curse, baby, or I’ll spank you.”

“Joellllll—”

“That’s better. Moan my name when I’m fuckin’ you. Your hole’s stretched so good right now. Taking both cocks. Wish you could see what I see. Greedy little cunt.”

“Ohhhh, Joel. I’m gonna—“

“Call me ‘daddy’ if ya want. i know you do—hngggg”

“Daddyyyy!”

“Fuck— fuck—aahhhhh.”

Joel was shooting his hot cum into you, rope after rope. He didn’t plan on coming inside but the lust clouded his mind. He wanted you full with his load, his cock and the dildo. The sight of your pussy swallowing everything he gave you, stretched to the limit, pushed him over the edge and into the pits of hell. He didn’t care. He was growling, his head down, watching his balls twitch, pumping his jeez into your core. They were resting on the toy, which was half pushed out of your hole by his own cock and your pulsating walls. He could believe that he made his stepdaughter come on his dick while she was moaning like a whore, accepting his cum like the greatest gift. What a perfect little slut!

When the last drop of his load was discarded into your sloppy cunt, Joel pulled his cock and the pink toy out. Both were glistening with his and your cum.

“Clean us up,” he growled and made you get up on shaky legs. You immediately fell on your knees and Joel grinned.

“Good girl. Now get to work.”

He brought the toy to his still hard manhood and watched you lick the cocks clean. At one point you took both dicks in your whimpering mouth.

“Fuck, ya hot! All your holes are hungry for two dicks, huh? Your pussy, now your mouth. Ya know what hole’s next, yeah?”

You pulled away with a scared expression and Joel barked a laugh.

”Don’t fret, sweetie. All in its time.”

He pulled you up by your arm and held your body tight when his lips crashed against yours. The taste of you and him made his cock twitch. He kissed you hard and you welcomed it. Perfect little slut indeed.

”Get some sleep,” he ordered, tucking you into bed. You looked fucked out of your mind and your tired smile made him smirk. “You need rest. So daddy could have lots of fun with you later.”

He turned the lights off on his way out.

Joel wasn’t a good man. But he was a happy one.

Thank you for reading! Comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated!<3

MASTERLIST || more stepdad Joel || more step family naughtiness

Tag list: @milla-frenchy @harriedandharassed @iamasaddie @nervousmumbling @bbyanarchist @stevie75 @puduvallee @auteurdelabre @mountainsandmayhem @senoratess @flamingochick55 @theoraekenslover @schnarfer @mermaidgirl30 @staywildflowahchild @yesjazzywazzylove-blog @evolnoomym @keylimebeag @joelmillerisapunk @pascaltesfaye @fruityreads @itwasntimethatdidit40

Special tag @toxicanonymity

[mssalo]

masterlist - mssalo

Welcome!

I write a mix of content, including dark themes and smut, so please make sure to always check the warnings before reading each fic. Some stories may explore darker topics, and those will be clearly marked with appropriate content warnings.

18+ ONLY.

· · ───────────𖥸──────────· ··

fixation - smut

here

You have an oral fixation, and Joel is more than happy to keep your mouth busy.

· · ─

taste - smut

here

You've slowly chipped away at Joel's gruff exterior, turning his frowns into smiles. One night, your playful teasing leads to something more, and when Joel finally gives in, the intense passion between you two becomes impossible to control.

· · ─

hummingbird - smut, dark

here: I  II

In the quiet town of Jackson, Joel becomes consumed by an obsession with his new neighbor. What begins as fascination turns into something much darker as his protective instincts morph into possessive desires, blurring the line between safeguarding and owning her.

· · ─

safety - smut, dark

here: I  II III IV V

Joel’s life is built around control and keeping danger at bay. But when a sweet young woman starts working at the supply store, her innocence stirs something inside him. His obsession with keeping her safe quickly spirals into something darker.

· · ─

worship - smut, bestfriendswife!reader

here part two

Ignored and humiliated by your husband, you find yourself in Joel's arms-his best friend who's been silently craving you for far too long. One heated night pushes you both over the edge, and Joel isn't holding back. He's ready to give you what your husband never could: everything.

· · ─

access - smut, husband!joel

here

You and your husband, Joel, share a deep understanding - your body is his, to fuck and taste whenever he desires, without question or hesitation.

· · ─

debt - smut, darkish!joel

here

Joel saved you, and now you depend on him for survival. But after one mistake too many, he demands you repay him-with your body.

You owe him, and he's done keeping you safe for free.

· · ─

dirty old man - series, smut

caretaker!reader x oldman!joel (a lot of new smut will come with this duo)

dirty old man - the beginning

dirty old man - the doctor’s office

dirty old man - on your knees

dirty old man - sleeping

You were assigned as Joel Miller’s caretaker, but he’s a perverted old man who just can’t keep his hands off you. And the truth is, you don’t mind one bit—in fact, you want more.

· · ───────────𖥸──────────· ··

[milla-frenchy]

Wolf like me

2k2 | Joel Miller x fem reader Summary: you meet someone who finally fills the void in you Warnings: 18+ mdni. Darkish. rough sex, oral (m/f), facial, self abandonment, toxic relationship, possessiveness, jealousy, spitting, biting, manhandling, unprotected piv, rimming, ass play, anal, creampie, reader is looking for pain, Joel is not particularly nice and not caring either. No age specified. a/n: @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog thank you for beta-ing me, and hearing me whine 😭💕🫶 There are Joels that are particularly physically powerful, brutal, and sexually aggressive. I call them “beast!Joel” 😍🥵 Here they are: Carnal @pascalsbby | Daddy Joel & A day in the filth @toxicanonymity | Lost in the dark @iamasaddie. Thank you for these awesome fics 🙏❤️ Here’s mine :) The title is from Wolf like me by TV on the radio

ao3 | masterlist | part 2

Joel was pretty well known at the QZ. He had the reputation of a distant man, not meddling in other people's affairs and hating people meddling in his own. He carried out the worst tasks, those that paid the most. It was impossible to know what shenanigans he was getting into with Tess, the woman he was often seen with. Impossible to know why he sometimes met FEDRA soldiers on the sidelines, but without really hiding it, as if he knew that no one would dare bother him.

You worked for Robert and you knew that his relationship with Joel was tense. So for some time now, when Robert needed something from Joel, he went through you. Every time you met him, Joel lived up to his reputation. He grumbled more than spoke, he was not very verbose, he did not bother with manners and was barely polite. He used to roll his eyes an embarrassing number of times at you, like you were the stupidest person in the world. However, he didn't impress you, and one day, you caught a grin when you responded to him in a biting tone.

That’s probably how you ended up on your knees in front of him one evening, his cock in your mouth and his fist clenched in your hair. His massive hand on the back of your head holding you exactly how he wanted, while he was fucking your throat without worrying about the tears forming at the corners of your eyes.

He let go of you, and ordered you to get on the bed, “cheek against the pillow and ass in the air.” 

You looked up at him, without immediately obeying, and he pointed to the bed with his chin. You got up and settled in, unable to resist his directive tone. When he knelt behind you, his fat cock in his hand, ready to push it into your core, you freed yourself from his hand, asking him to wait.

“Wait for what exactly, little girl?”

In someone else's mouth, this pet name might have been cute. Or kind. But in his, you felt like a helpless little thing in the hands of a man much more powerful than you.

“Wait until I’m prepared,” you whispered.

“Do you think I’m gonna make love to you, baby girl?”

He tilted his head to the side, waiting for your response which didn't come.

“Cause I don’t make love. I fuck hard. So either you take my fuckin’ cock the way I wanna give it to you, or you get the fuck outta here.”

You let him fuck you the way he wanted, your teeth digging into the flesh of your hand to keep you from screaming, while his fingers were firmly buried in the flesh of your hips. He pulled out just before he came, grabbing your arm for you to follow him to the side of the bed. His feet planted on the ground, he jerked himself into his clenched fist until spurts of cum covered your face.

Stunned by his animality, you didn't move before he pushed you down onto the floor, and he plunged into you, his tongue dipping into your aching pussy. He ate you as he had fucked you just before: like a hungry beast devouring its wounded prey. His fingers were everywhere, on your clit, in your pussy and in your ass. Yours were buried in his curls, clawing at his scalp, making him grunt against your folds until you came, exhausted, and finally relaxed your muscles that had been contracting until then, under the assaults he had inflicted on you.

Of course, he didn't walk you home. He didn’t even say a word to you, to be honest. He barely watched you wipe away the cum that was still on your cheeks.

You continued to meet Joel on Robert's behalf, and you returned to his apartment several times.

Every time he fucked you, you felt like you were being tossed around in dark waters, the movement of which seemed strangely familiar to you. And above all, the feeling gave you the confirmation that you were still alive.

Joel wanted to own, to take. And you wanted to be owned, creating a perfect balance between you. You were giving him everything he wanted. Your body was always adapting to his, whatever hole he thrusted into. He probably licked and smelled every inch of your skin. Left bite marks on your body, as if his cock deep inside you wasn't enough, as if he needed to sink his teeth into your skin. Needed to show everyone that you were his. That you had been claimed. “I want you to use my body whenever and however you want”, you told him once. And he did. Days after days.

As soon as you closed the door to his apartment behind you, you felt that the atmosphere was heavier than usual. He was sitting near the dining room table, facing the front door, and you.

“Who was it?”, he asked, in an annoyed voice, so low you barely heard him, while his fist was clenched on the table.

"Who are you talking about?"

“That boy, with you near the guardhouse this afternoon.” He spat out the sentence, his jaw clenched, the sound of his voice barely reaching your ears.

“He’s one of Robert’s guys, he’s not a boy,” you replied, shrugging your shoulders. He stood up suddenly and slammed you against the wall with surprising agility for a man of his build. His hand pressed against your throat, his face lowered towards you, you only saw his dark eyes.

“You let him fuck you?” he growled, tightening his grip on your throat.

“No, damn, Joel…”, you whispered.

He released his grip slightly and breathed down your neck, then moved up to your ear, as if to make sure that he would only smell your scent on you.

“Mine,” he murmured, his nose in your hair, his hand sliding from your throat to one of your breasts which he grabbed.

“Yours”, you breathed in his ear, your hand clinging to his bicep.

“I’m gonna be brutal, baby doll.”

“I know.”

He unbuttoned his pants, pulling out his hard cock, before grabbing your thighs and lifting you off the ground. He pushed aside the panties under your dress, and positioned his tip at your entrance. He looked at you, daring you with his gaze to tell him to wait. But it’s been a long time now since you asked him to be prepared. You only wanted to feel him more. Always more. And the faster he plunged into you, the more intoxicating the sensation was.

He sank in, his gaze boring into yours as his cock split your pussy. In one push he bottomed out. He pulled back almost all the way and thrusted in again, after tilting his pelvis so that you impaled yourself as deep as possible on his shaft. Breathless, you grabbed his shoulders to try to ease the way you were taking his cock. But he placed his arm against your back and tightened his hand on the back of your neck, trapping you in his embrace. He pounded you against the wall, and you were whimpering at each stroke of his cock.

“You’re mine”, he said again, thrusting in. “You belong to me, only my cock can fuck this cunt. You hear me, little girl?”

“Fuck… Yes Joel! Just you.”

“Not only your cunt. Everything. I want only my smell on you.”

He grabbed your chin in his hand, looking at you questioningly. You nodded and said “only you.”

“Good girl. Come here.”

He released you and grabbed your arm, squeezing it way too tightly with his large hand, before throwing you onto the bed. He was standing in front of you, his pants just under his balls, still covering his thick thighs. His hand was tight on his cock, glistening with your wetness. You could see the vein in his neck pulsing.

He spat into his palm before jerking off harshly while watching you.

“Joel”, you whimpered. “Please I want-”

“You’ll have that cock when I’ll give it to you”, he cut you off.

“Please Joel, use me”, you whined again.

“Jesus, you need my cock that bad? Get on all fours, then. And take off your clothes.”

You undressed and watched him remove his clothes, before waiting for him on your hands and knees. The bed sank under his weight as he knelt behind you. He ran his hands from your neck to the small of your back. He reveled in your eagerness, seeing your ass pushed back towards him. You wanted him to use you, the way he wanted. He placed his cock at your entrance, and thrusted in slowly. So slowly that it was almost more painful than when he would suddenly stick it in you. Like a bandage that you gently remove instead of ripping it off all at once. You felt your pussy spread painfully to let his cock sink in. You felt his skin warming you up from the inside. He kept thrusting, and you realized that you had been holding your breath since he dove in you. You breathed deeply, keeping yourself from moving backwards and impaling yourself on his cock in one blow. You knew he wanted to control the pace, and you wanted him to act that way. You wanted to be in pain, to feel things as intensely as possible, and for as long as possible.

You felt so fragile and vulnerable, with his massive hands on you and his cock piercing you. And at the same time, you had never felt so safe. Nothing could happen to you, with him.

Finally his cock bottomed out and you gasped. He pulled back and thrusted in with a brutal move this time, as you reflexively leaned forward. He tightened his embrace, threatening “don’t you dare. You’re gonna take my cock, as I want you to take it.” You bit your lip and nodded.

You heard him spit and you shivered as you felt his saliva reach your ass, his thumb immediately coming up to push it into your ring. You heard him grunt behind your back, guessing his contemplation between keeping fucking your pussy or claiming your ass. With a snort, he pulled out, dipping his tongue against your ass, lapping flat. You heard him jerking off into his fist and part of you hoped to see him desperate to the point of cumming against the sheets without having time to fuck you. But his primal instinct for possession was the strongest, and he positioned himself against your ring once he felt you would be able to take it.

He pushed, and you waited quietly, controlling your breath, until the tip was fully in.

“Oh fuck, Joel…”

“Always ready to take it in your ass, right?”

“I…fuck. Yeah. I can always take it.”

“Good girl”, he praised, as he thrusted in suddenly, the brutality of his action clashing with the sound of his voice. You didn't have time to say a word, he was already pulling back before burying himself again, showing you once more that you were his, pinching your hips, and you knew that the morning after your skin there would be blue.

“Turn around, I want to see your face while I fuck your ass,” he said, pulling back and manhandling you to turn around.

You lay on your back, and he grabbed the back of your knees to bring them closer to your shoulders before thrusting in. The position made the penetration so deep that you thought he was actually going to tear you in half. His growls were more animalistic than human and you lost yourself in their sounds. 

“Look”, he said. “Look at my cock, ruining your ass.”

He pulled his torso away from yours and you looked down, where your bodies were one.

“Fuck, baby doll. Look. You’re taking it so good.”

“Joel... Let off all your steam. Use me for that.”

“Shit you’re…you never get enough of that cock.”

He fucked you, probably harder than ever, and you couldn't feel your body anymore.

“Lose yourself in me”, he told you, looking at you as if he was reading you. “I’m here for it”, he added. You came, hearing him, your clit rubbing against his lower stomach.

Burying in your ass, he grabbed your wrists with one hand and held them above your head, placing his mouth against your armpit, licking away the beads of sweat hidden there and growling against your skin.

“Jo…fuck. Joel.”

“Mmmm?”, he growled.

“The sounds you make, when you fuck me. I…- fuck.. I feel so full - …I love these sounds.”

For the first time, you thought you saw a loss of control in him, and you tried to catch his gaze. When he froze inside you and shot the hot spurts of cum into your ass, all you could think about was the dark waves you were floating in, and you came a second time on his cock.

You got dressed and as you were leaving he grabbed you, holding you against him like no one had ever done before. He held you so tight that it was painful, but you would have let him crack one of your ribs if it would allow you to continue this embrace. When he released you, you tried to meet his gaze again, but he had already turned away from you.

When you got back to your apartment, you knew you were screwed. Fucking with him, letting him use you in any possible way, was no longer enough.

Part 2

********************

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[justagalwhowrites]

Master List

What I've been working on lately. All works are 18+, minors DNI

Now accepting requests :)

A note on tipping (AKA please read before you tip!)

Joel Miller x Female Reader

Oneshots/Requests

Bane of My Existence (QZ Smuggler!Joel Miller x Female Reader)

Undone (Dom!Joel Miller x Sub!Female Reader)

Homecoming (DBF!Joel x Female Reader)

Lavender No Outbreak AU Masterlist

Sick Leave (Joel Miller x Female Reader from Lavender)

Date Night (Joel Miller x Female Reader from Lavender)

Girl Dad (Joel Miller x Female Reader from Lavender)

Long Day (Joel Miller x Female Reader from Lavender AU)

Long Distance (DBF!Joel Miller x Female Reader from Homecoming)

Pick Me (Joel Miller x Female Reader)

Proof of Life (Darkish!Joel Miller x Female Reader, QZ era)

The Watch (Joel Miller x Female Reader, QZ era)

Fucksgiving 2K23: Gray Sweatpants

Game Time - A New in Town College Football One Shot

Wonderland - A Lavender No Outbreak AU One Shot

What Was Lost... - A Lavender One Shot set between chapters 8 and 9

...Can Be Found - A Lavender One Shot set between chapters 47 and 48

Expecting - A Lavender Drabble set between chapters 48 and 49

Undone - No Outbreak AU Joel Miller x Female Reader

Curse and Comfort - A Jackson!Joel Period One Shot

Yearling

After years of surviving in the wilds of Wyoming after the cordyceps outbreak, you find yourself in Jackson. It's a town filled with friendly faces and the kind of world you hardly remember, let alone can connect with or understand. But one man - Joel Miller, another loner, like you - makes you think that trying to find your place in society again might be worth it.

A slow burn friends-to-lovers fan fic.

Masterlist

Yearling No Outbreak AU

Bambi and Joel find each other in every timeline.

Masterlist

The Savage and the Sanctuary

After the death of his daughter, Joel Miller fell apart. But when searching for answers at the bottom of a bottle and within his own rage doesn't fix it, he resigns himself to working for his brother in private security. It's a job that starts him down the path to stability and a semblance of a life, even if it's not one he particularly wants. At least it does until you show up.

The biggest movie star in the world with your newly adopted niece in tow, you throw everything about Joel's life into flux. Is he capable of letting himself feel something again while protecting the only things left in the world that matter?

Masterlist

Halcyon

When your life falls apart, you find yourself back in your hometown of Austin, Texas for the first time in more than a decade. Eager to make your own way after a rough divorce, you reconnect with your high school best friend Joel Miller - a man you never thought would be in your life again.

Things have changed since your falling out just before you left for college but friendship with Joel comes easy. His life isn't in any better shape than your own and the two of you make a vow to get your acts together - personal, professional and romantic - in the span of a year. But will your burgeoning connection make it so you can figure everything out or will your history together get in the way?

Masterlist

Stranger in a bar

You meet a stranger in a bar, one who is fun and sexy and makes you wonder if the single life is all it's cracked up to be. But there's one big problem: you probably shouldn't be fucking your dad's best friend.

Masterlist

Run Rabbit

It was just over a year after the world ended that you were captured by Joel and Tommy Miller. They’re harsh, they’re cold and they’re killers. But, as a nurse, you’re a valuable person to have around and they’re not the worst thing wandering the wasteland that was the United States. And there might be more to these men than meets the eye.

Masterlist

Holly Jolly

Joel Miller has never been a fan of Christmas. It's stressful, it's expensive and it's depressing. But a chance meeting in line to take his five-year-old daughter to see Santa might just change that.

Masterlist

New in Town

When you move to Austin for work, your best friend Sarah recommends that you hang out with her dad, Joel, to get to know the area. Sarah just never mentioned the fact that her dad is just your type.

Masterlist

Haunted House - A Halloween one shot

Manic Monday - A New in Town Drabble

Lavender

An age-gap grumpy/sunshine friends-to-lovers (and eventually friends-to-lovers-to-enemies-to-friends-to-lovers) fanfic that starts pre-outbreak. Will be long running and updated regularly and run through the outbreak and at least season one of TLOU.

Lavender Masterlist

Lavender No Outbreak AU Masterlist

My casting of the OCs

Found Family - Fan Art

Joel & Doc - Fan Art

Family Portrait

Joel - Fan Art

The Mandalorian x Female Reader

Excerpts and previews of Beskar Doll (found in total on AO3), an enemies-to-friends-to-lovers slow burn fic.

Tumblr Chapter Master List

Buycika - a Beskar Doll Drabble

Growing - A Beskar Doll Drabble

Overcome - Din Djarin x Female Reader

For You - A Collection of Requests Benefitting Palestine

Featuring Joel Miller, Oberyn Martell, Din Djarin

[joeloverture]

comeuppance | qz!j.m. x f!reader

masterlist | notifs blog

pairing: qz!joel miller x f!reader summary: [post outbreak] when your recklessness causes an arms deal to go south, joel makes sure you regret it. warnings: (18+ mdni) qz!joel, age gap (late 20s/early 50s), written with hbo!joel in mind but with game!joel lore, guns, mentioned executions, misogynistic names outside (and in!) a sexual context, canon-typical violence as in murder (joel kills a soldier 'on-screen'), reader is a little shit but joel is worse, darkish & dubcon, spanking as a punishment, gunplay, attempted boot humping, degradation, humiliation, one kick to the cunt, mean!joel, orgasm denial [no use of y/n] word count: 2.7k a/n: this is my (admittedly late) submission for @iamasaddie's writing challenge 2.0! my prompt was 'you can't hide forever'. the genre was technically dark but joel himself isn't scarily dark here. thank you so much to aly for, once again, bringing this fandom together with her challenges. it's a steep task but she does a great job every time! and even more thanks to @joelsdagger and @lovesickonmybed for helping me brainstorm! (i have half of a brain without my wonderfully creative friends).

It only takes one deal gone south to fuck everything up.

You know the compass is already ticking that way the moment you and Joel, your longtime smuggling partner, enter the abandoned warehouse. Much like everything else in the Boston QZ, it’s falling apart. The corrugated metal walls are pitted with rust, and old blood is caked all over the floors. In another life, it might’ve been a slaughterhouse, but there’s no real way of knowing. It’s been long enough that any signage has deteriorated. The building’s state of decay, however, isn’t what messes things up.

It’s the singular man that walks in from the opposite side of the atrium.

FEDRA’s favorite executioner. Slitted eyes far apart, thinned out lips, and graying black hair. Rarely seen away from the gallows, only recognizable to you from all of the nightmares you’ve had of his face being the last you see.

If it were drugs, you’d think nothing of it. FEDRA soldiers buy quietly from you all of the time – but they have no need for guns that they don’t already have.

Joel steps forward, merchandise in the duffel bag over his shoulder, none the wiser. A knot ties itself in the base of your throat. You’re too busy trying to figure out what to do, what to do, what to do that you barely even realize that the soldier has a gun aimed right between your eyes until you’re looking right down the barrel.

Your hand jerks to your holster, drawing your pistol in one swipe.

“Drop your fucking gun!” he barks in your direction. It clatters out of your hands. “Don’t you dare fucking move.” Your hands fly up as you take a step back, nearly stumbling into a nearby crate. “Joel Miller and his bitch,” the man sneers. “What a lucky find. You two have quite the bounty on your heads.”

“Don’t do anything stupid,” Joel says, face completely blank.

“Easy for you to say,” the guard says with a nagging smirk. “Your little cunt here already did. Pretty fucking dumb not to check who you’re selling your merchandise to, huh?”

Joel tenses, ultimately huffing through his nose. “Can we get this over with?”

“I’ll make it easy, Miller. Come with me alive so I get paid, or come with me dead so I still get paid.”

Joel’s fingers twitch behind his back, and after almost three years of working with him, it’s impossible not to pick up on the subtext. Keep him busy. His hand is already reaching for the revolver in his back pocket.

“Turn the other way. I can make this worth your time,” you say. “But you’re lucky if those sons of bitches you work for even offer you half the reward they’ve posted for us. Dragging the bodies from Area 5 to the closest checkpoint… you’d have your work cut out for you.”

“Yeah fucking right,” he spits. “You two have been running around free for too damn long. Causing too much trouble. Not anymo–”

The man’s mouth freezes around the words by the time the bullet soars throat the canvas fabric of Joel’s duffel bag and through the man’s jugular. The soldier’s hands claw for his throat while he gargles on the blood as he begins the descent to the ground. New blood, still pumping directionless from the split artery, joins the old.

Much like him, where he’s slumping against the ground, chest moving until the very end, your hands clutch at your own throat. “We need to go,” you say, knowing the rest of FEDRA will come looking for the firefight at any second now. Joel doesn’t move. “Joel!” You reach out to tug his sleeve, but he doesn’t react. “Jesus– move!”

Joel turns to face you, gun still hanging from his hand. His fingers flex around the grip. “What the hell were you thinkin’, little girl?” You can hear his breathing, amplified from how close he is to you. His once inexpressive face is now red, lips curled, skin tight like a crushed soda can. 

“I– what?”

“Not vettin’ your buyers. First fuckin’ thing I told you all them years ago, wasn’t it? Gotta check so you don’t sell shit to the wrong guy, yeah?” He stalks closer to you – you stumble back.

Not vetting the now dead executioner, whose blood is currently creeping up to the soles of your boots. Your mistake, yes, a potentially catastrophic one that you’ll definitely never make again after this, but he’d been on your ass about finding buyers and after an entire day of burning bodies, the last thing you wanted to do was go asking around about the ‘John’ in search of guns that you’d talked to over the radio tower.

“We’re alive, aren’t we?”

Joel finally jerks his sleeve away from your grip. Your hand falls slack by your side, burning from his fire stoker touch. “And you oughta count your fuckin’ blessings for that. Dumbfuck of a girl, gonna get me killed,” he spits. Spittle flies across your neck. 

You flinch – and not because you’re scared. You’ve never seen him like this before. You hear noise in the distance, the moving of FEDRA trucks, no doubt. “Joel! We can do this later – we need to fucking go–”

“Then you better start running,” he says gruffly.

You don’t need to be told twice.

You sprint out of the atrium, cursing as your bloodied soles carve tracks behind you. A stack of crates blocks the door, which you vault over and shimmy your way through the broken glass panel. The hallway ahead of you is dark, and you have no idea where the fuck you’re going, only that you can’t stop. Each impact of your foot on the ground is like being struck by lightning, carbonating the racing blood pumping through your body. More glass crunches behind you, and a shock of terror pierces you when you hear Joel’s snarls filling the corridor.

There’s a metal cart in your way, which you send whirling in Joel’s direction. He grunts, presumably hitting him in the stomach before it goes clattering on the ground. You make the most of the diversion, hurtling forward and lurching through a cracked door.

Dead fucking end.

An office, by the looks of it. Desks all over the place, leftover tasks still pinned on cork boards from outbreak day, chairs on their sides. You hear Joel huffing and puffing behind you, and fear forks through you. You fall to your hands and knees, crawling underneath the labyrinth of desks and tucking yourself against a wall, carpet-burned hand to your mouth to muffle your breathing. Your chest avalanches with every single breath.

“You ain’t off the hook,” Joel says, voice getting closer with every word. You can hear the thump of his boots against the carpet. See the spread of his shadow roaming across the wall. You squint through the seam of two desks. He's looking over his shoulder when you haul yourself across the room to the next closest desk.

You look around for anything that might get you out of this long enough to slip back out of the door. If you can make it back to the apartment, maybe he can cool off on his own walk back. You reach up for a stapler and take a brief second to peek over a filing cabinet before flinging it against the wall. It snaps open, spilling decades old staples all over the floor.

“Only a clicker’s fallin’ for that,” he tuts at you. His boots land on the floor again, one, two, three steps closer to you. You wince, balling your hands into fists. 

All you can hear is the thrashing of your own heart. You scooch away from the desk – maybe if you throw something small at him, like a pack of sticky notes, it’ll be enough to abduct his attention long enough for you to slip by–

“You can’t hide forever,” Joel goddamn coos at you. You see him bending at the waist, scoping out the undersides of desks, seeking you out–

You crawl out from under the desk and book it to the door.

Stupid. Fucking. Idea.

Joel hauls you back by the belt loop, laughing as you cry out. You try squirming away, kicking at him, but his other arm wraps around your torso. It hits you then that you have no idea what he might do to you. You’ve trusted him with your life before, but what would he do when you risked his? You’d always been too scared to find out. He spins you, slamming you over the desk. You cry out as your chest meets the wood. His hand drags your wrists together, pinning them at the small of your back.

“Let me – the fuck– go!” you yell at him, trying to bend your elbow at the right angle to nail him in the chest.

He tightens his grip so much that you can barely move an inch. “Made your fuckin’ bed, gotta lie in it, sweetheart,” he tuts, shaking his head at you. His hand grazes over your ass, and you stiffen as he looms over you. He is just a man. Your mind spins to the worst-case scenario. No, no, no, no–

“How about an… old-fashioned corporal punishment to set ya straight?” Within the next second, he’s yanking your jeans down your thighs.

Oh. Oh fuck.

“Joel–” you exhale, breath shuddery. “Knock it off–”

“No panties? I was gonna be nice and spank ya over them…” Joel frowns at you. “Poor baby. ‘S gonna sting real bad.”

You snap at him, “What, you want me to go to the local QZ Victoria’s Secret?”

Joel swats, hard, across your asscheek.

You’ve seen how intense Joel’s brute strength can be. You’ve just never been on the receiving end of it. A cry pushes out of your throat, and you hunch over the desk as you struggle helplessly against Joel. Tears spring at your eyes.

Mercifully, Joel runs his calloused palm over the smarting skin. “Shh, shh, shh, shh. ‘S okay, Jus’ gotta teach ya a lesson. Make sure it sticks.” He strokes the nape of your neck as you whimper into the desk.

You tense up in preparation for the second hit, but, if anything, it just makes the impact worse. It prickles your other cheek, leaving your knees shaky. And God help you, your clit twitches. Twitches. Your thighs are already heating up, and you can’t help but squirm in a good way underneath Joel. A single tear slips over your waterline, and you have to tilt your head into the shoulder of your shirt to wipe it off. You don’t want him to see you weak – not that weak.

The next spank makes him grunt from how hard he swings his palm into your backside. “Joel!” you shout, pain nearly splitting you in two. Your feet raise off of the ground as you prop yourself up on the desk, kicking uselessly at his shins. All he does is chuckle at you.

Horror sinks like a cinderblock in your stomach when you realize that your hole, leaking slick, is practically fucking winking at him. You thank the darkness. It’s about the only good thing about this place.

“You don’t like that?” he mock-pouts at you. It’s enough to make you throb. The opposite, you’d say if you could.

A series of spanks follows, but at least these are lighter, and in rapid succession. Still, you jerk with each impact, squirming so that your fingers dance in his grip. “Stupid little girl. Thought you could sell our shit to a FEDRA bitch and get off scot-free? Really thought you could get away from me, huh?”

You try clamming up, desperately attempting to close your legs together. You squeeze your thighs together, relieved at the pressure – and then you hear a resounding click behind you.

You still.

Joel’s gun, still fucking hot from the bullet it’d fired right into the executioner’s throat, traces up the small of your back… all the way to your throat. “Could put one right here,” Joel whispers, more to himself than you. “Show ya what happens to girls that don’t follow orders.” He jams it into your skin, and you hiss at the pain, at the bruise it’s sure to leave. And in spite of it all, you fucking gush. God, you’re fucked up.

He wouldn’t kill you – he needs you more than you need him. But common sense isn’t enough to prevent the thrill, the arousal smiting your body from head to toe.

“I’ll reconsider if ya give it a kiss.” He nudges the barrel carefully against your lips and you stop breathing for a second, maybe two. “Go on. Give it some lovin’. Suck it like a cock. I know you’re good at it. Hear all the guys you bring over.”

You whimper at the thought of Joel listening to you getting your hook ups off – at the thought of him fisting his own cock while he listens. Obediently, you part your lips, slowly, ever so slowly, taking the gun down your throat. It fills your mouth up in such a strange way – all hard edges. It’d be freezing cold if not for the fact that it’s a weapon of death, a scythe in its own way. One press of the trigger, and you’d be just like the guard. You suck even harder at it, eyes rolling back in your skull. Your thighs twitch, stripes of slick running down your thighs. 

Joel reaches between your legs, grabbing at the meat of your inner thigh to spread you open. Instead, he gets a handful of the arousal that’s been pooling between your legs since he first bent you over the desk.

You freeze, pausing your ministrations on the pistol. He himself freezes before he drags his hips over your folds. His finger pads hover over your swollen clit before he properly rubs you once, and then twice. Your hips cant into the closest thing – his hand.

Joel makes a disgusted noise and swats your leaking pussy before shoving you forward and stepping back. You’re panting, properly fucked out even though he’d barely touched you. Cross-eyed, tongue hanging out, face hot. He looks you up and down, brows furrowing with revulsion. “Horny fuckin’ bitch. Creamin’ all over me. That long since you got action that a spankin’ and a gun in your mouth is all it takes to get you riled up? Pathetic.” He shoves the gun back in his pocket, still shining with your saliva.

He wipes your wetness all over your leg, grabs the back of your collar, and drags you to the floor in one foul swoop. You fall on your hands and knees again, ass still stinging from his treatment, lightheaded from how needy you are. Even his brutal treatment makes you whimper. 

You reach for his calf, pulling yourself up to brace your dripping cunt against his boot. You rut against it, not even fully cognizant of your movements as you roll your hips, praying that he lets you have this if nothing else. Your orgasm, wetting his boot thoroughly. Your scent, clinging to him on the walk back to the apartment. You buck into the boot, moaning as the toe bumps against your clit. It might be enough, if you could just do it one more time–

Joel tears his shoe out from underneath you, face pinched with aversion. “No!” you cry, still grabbing for his calf. You fall onto your back, legs spread and panting. Your ass needles from his spanking. The ceiling tiles spin above you. 

The same toe you’d been humping kicks into your cunt, and you yelp, curling in on yourself. Another tear slides down your burning cheek as you reach down to cup your sore pussy. Even that pressure feels like touching a live wire. 

Joel looks down at his shining boot and makes a disgusted noise. “Does humiliatin’ yourself always get ya dicked down?” 

He turns around, already walking away from you without a care in the world. The gun grip pokes out of his pocket, taunting you.

“Pull your goddamn pants up and get a move on. Curfew’s soon.”

[romana-after-dark]

“Blessed be the fruit”

“May the lord open”

The Handmaids Tale AU

Commander!Joel Miller x Darkish!Handmaid!Reader

Summary: A few decades into Gilead’s conception, you head into your first posting as a handmaid after an affair with a guardian landed you in trouble. Determined to keep your head low in order to keep your son safe, you take on the moniker of OfJoel. Commander Miller has very little to do with you and mrs. Miller regards you with disgust, however you find solace in an unlikely friendship with Commander Miller’s daughter from a handmaid 14 years ago, Ellie who just got done with wives school. You and your friend, Ofthomas start teacher her and her friend Reilly under her mothers nose. Slowly, Commander Miller begins spending time with you and you begin to learn more about the man he was before and an affair begins outside the confines of the ceremony. Although initially you go along with it out if survival, you find yourself falling for the version of Joel you saw in these late night rendezvous.

Which Joel is really him, and how will he react when his own daughters secrets are revealed?

Content and Warnings: DARK JOEL! DUB CON!

Although no violent rape happens like in TWW, reader is under systemic misogyny and a society of ritualized sex abuse. Everything other than the violent rape scenes, everything that happen in either The Handmaids Tale book or show are liable to happen here including but not limited to discussion of rape, child abuse, child marriage, ritualized sexual abuse, sexual abuse in general, acts of violence, major character deaths, mentions of miscarriage but never shown and never pregnancies we know of. Big ole homophobia warning, specifically in regards to lesbophobia. As for Joel, PIV sex, breeding kink, degrading (slut, whore etc but thing like Raider!joel) forced breeding and breeding kink, power dynamics, Joel is not the good guy but he’s also not the worst, slightly rough sex but not violent. Cucking, reader cucks joel's wife, is dark, participates in non con.

Warnings are liable to be added as the story goes but I’ll always update. As always if I miss something please tell me, but i extensively label my warnings and in the end media consumption is your own choice. If you would like to know if this is a happy ending or not you can message me and I’ll tell you that way I don’t spoil for everyone but you can decide if this is for you.

Immersability: Reader has long hair, can conceive children theoretically. At one point, she has to pose as Ellie's mother and I know this can be loaded in terms of skin tone. I am no genetics expert but I know dark skinned parents can have white passing children, like Lional Richie and Nicle Richie. It's up to you to see if this is going to take you out of the story or not.

Undecided amount of chapters

Chapter 1: You meet your first commander, his family, and your new walking partner

Chapter 2: Your first ceremony, and you see something you aren’t supposed to.

Chapter 3: Everything is not as it seems in either Miller household.

Chapter 4: it’s smut.

Flashback Bonus Chapter: Insight into Tommy, Angela, and Joel's relationship.

Chapter 5: Joel takes you somewhere special. Tommy is involved.

Bonus Chapter: Tommy and Angela

Chapter 6: Gina gets what’s coming.

Chapter 7: Tommy, Joel, OfJoel and Angela explore

Finale (part 1): Ellie gets caught.

Finale (Part 2): Joel fixes it

If you are interested, please comment or say so in a Reblog! Rebloging a masterlist is super helpful to get a series off the ground well!

Thank you so much for your support!

[millersamour]

different devils (series prologue) - joel miller x f!reader

“We’re all in the same game; just different levels. Dealing with the same hell; just different devils.”

Word Count: 3.2k

Pairing: joel miller x f!reader

Series Summary: You're one of Jackson's longest, and most reclusive inhabitants. You're Tommy's patrol partner. You raised an adopted son. Now spending every day doing what you can to keep the devil at bay. Until Joel Miller shows up, with a fourteen year old, and the same kind of demons.

(collage made on pinterest)

Series Warnings: set during outbreak, violence, descriptions of body mutilation, use of weapons, reader is 21 in prologue but 34 in main story, age gap (joel is 56), eventual smut (will tag accordingly), darkish! joel, reader is also a violent survivalist, reader has a similar joel/ellie dynamic with an oc!, raider/cult subplot, typical disturbing stuff in media about zombies/apocalypse situations

Prologue Summary: After nine years of surviving the apocalypse you meet some people who offer you the chance to start over.

A/N: straight up no joel in this :/ sorry lol, this is just character plot because i love angst and slow burn!!!! we support traumatized morally grey fmcs in this house <3

-

Prologue

March 2011 

You had been tracking a doe for about an hour when you heard the sounds. Deep gurgling and clicking echoing from somewhere you couldn’t see. 

Fuck. 

The deer seemed like a lost cause if there were any more than a single one of those unforgiving creatures lurking nearby. 

With one last glance to the deer, its light brown fur shining in the morning sun, you tucked the bow underneath the thick leather strap of the quiver at your back and made quick work of climbing a thick tree.

You watched the creature below from about twenty feet in the air. The deformed body weaving between the trees, dragging its feet through the wet vegetation. Growths emerging from its skull covered any trace of its former humanity. Bright fungi absorbing the very idea that this thing had ever bore resemblance to a person. The bow in your grasp followed its movements as it veered left, and thankfully, away from your campsite. 

Not wasting any arrows today.

With a sigh of relief, which sounded more like a huff of annoyance, you surveyed the area a final time before deciding to make your way back to Leon. You dismounted the tree, landing the last few feet with a thud and took off back into the thicket. 

Rope and sticks had been used to hold up what had once been a tarp, now just a small sheet of plastic, to create a makeshift tent. It was completely useless against the cold but it had kept you dry from the torrential downpour that had plagued your travel the last few days. The first signs of spring were always welcome after months of cold and snow, but you couldn’t deny the pang of guilt you felt after surviving another winter. 

Leon was awake now, nursing a small fire. He grinned as he watched your form emerge from the treeline. The early morning gave you a respite, where it could just be you and Leon. Not what you had become part of. 

“Anything good?” He asked, eyes trailing from your face to glance at your empty hands. 

“No” You shook your head. “Damn clicker came outta nowhere and spooked the deer I spent an hour tracking” You huffed, slumping beside him. 

Grimacing, he handed you a thermos and you sipped. Warm water flooded your mouth and sternum as it landed in your empty stomach. You hummed, savouring the temporary warmth and handed it back to him. He pulled a small bunch of cloth from his backpack and you grimaced at the only remnants of food you had left.

It had been almost six months since you and Leon had been on your own and almost a full two years since you’d left the QZ.

-

You had only been twelve on outbreak day. But you could recall those memories like it had been yesterday. Stepping off the school bus, doing homework, and eating dinner with your parents, before heading off to bed. You remembered the soft pink of your bedroom. The quilt at the foot of your bed. The toy rabbit you’d slept with since you were born. 

But the sounds of alarms and glass shattering and screams had woken you. 1:02 AM flashing bright green on your alarm clock. You had crept downstairs. The noises outside drowned out by the fear of what would be waiting for you. 

Standing at the bottom of the stairs, you saw the pool of blood first. Crimson leaking into the cracks of blue kitchen tiles, staining the grout. You had hesitated before entering, not knowing what you would see once you turned the corner and passed the door frame. 

Her hair was splayed on the floor like a halo. Strands matted with blood. Her body, stiff in death, looked like she had been knocked back, like someone had shoved her. Peeking around the corner, you saw a huddled form leaning against the fridge; its white exterior marked with streaks of red, fingerprints smeared across family photos and a drawing you had made for your father’s birthday.

Quietly you had called out.

 “Dad?”

The hunched form had looked up at the sound, neck craning in an unnatural way. Strained breathing, like someone was trying to speak with lungs full of water, and growling sounds punched passed his lips. Sounds you had only ever heard in nature documentaries, sounds of pained and hungry animals who relied on teeth and claws and blood to survive.

Suddenly everything was happening to someone else. Like you were watching your life unravel from someone else’s eyes. 

It wasn’t you when your dad slowly rose to his full height, his hands and mouth covered in your mother’s blood. It wasn’t you when he lunged forward, hands reaching for your small form. It wasn’t you who ran away, taking the stairs two at a time while he slipped in what was left of your mother; still warm. It wasn’t you who had thrown open your parent’s bedroom door, slamming it behind you. Who had searched in the dark, for salvation, for safety, for something that could keep the monster at bay. 

The banging on the door was only getting louder, and you had hoped this was all some kind of nightmare. The kind where you woke up crying and your mother would be there to stroke your hair and sing until you drifted back into a peaceful slumber. 

But it was real and you had found the bat that your dad had kept stuffed in the closet.

Your small fingers clenched around the handle and you struggled to keep yourself upright. The image of your mother, her soft skin and dimpled smile flashed against the images of her broken body, of her abdomen peeled open. You could still hear the strangled breathing of the creature outside the door. 

No longer your father, only wearing his face. 

You pushed your back against the wall, feeling the reverberations through the wall as he slammed his body against wood. It was cracking and wouldn’t hold for long. 

It wasn’t you who had watched the door splinter. Who watched him shove his mangled form through. Left shoulder broken. Arm dangling loosely at his side. It wasn’t you who struggled to slow your breathing as his unseeing eyes stared into the darkness, streetlights peeking through the blinds to illuminate his grisly appearance. But it had been you. It had been you who had clenched her jaw, teeth grinding against teeth. Tightening your grip and stepping behind him as he wandered into the center of the room. It was you who heard the floorboard creak and had raised the bat before he even turned around. It was you who had swung and swung and swung. Until what had been your father no longer was. 

Just a bloodied heap on the ground. 

You had been found a few days later, hiding in your closet. Bat sticky with dried blood, still clenched in your hands. They had taken you, kicking and screaming, to what would become the Phoenix QZ, and your home for the next eight years. 

-

Movement startled you from the memories you pondered often, trying to conjure images of birthday parties and the photographs that lined your childhood home. But, all you were left with was the weight of two corpses and the shame of survival.

 Andy came through the tree line. His blonde hair stuck to his forehead and his smile bordered on feral. You had to stand to see what he was holding in his hand. 

Rabbits. 

“Little early for your ass to be up, isn’t it?” You chuckled, walking over to examine his prize.

“Early bird gets the worm” He grinned, holding the rabbits higher up. “Just taking a page from your book” 

He wasn’t wrong. In the last six months, you had been almost solely providing food for the four of you. Feeding Leon had been no problem, it was something you’d been doing for the last five years. But, Andy and his brother, Warren, hadn’t been pulling their weight. And you often had to remind them that they begged for your help and you had offered it to them, if they helped keep Leon alive. 

The commotion must have alerted Warren, because the older brother emerged from his own makeshift shelter. 

It had been a while since you’d caught anything substantial. Relying mostly on birds, fish, and other small wildlife to feed yourselves. But with spring slowly making its appearance, you knew there would be animals everywhere in the coming weeks. 

But rabbits, especially three of them, were enough to excite the four of you. Grinning at each other for the first time in weeks. 

Andy and Warren were whopping, hollering expletives in excitement. You moved to grab Andy’s arm, needing to shut them both up. But movement to your left had you throwing yourself out of the way.

The clicker. 

Fuck. 

You should’ve killed that stupid fucking thing when you had the chance. It was on Andy before you even had the opportunity to scream. It grabbed at his chest, seeking grip wherever it could find, and sank its teeth into the skin of his throat. They fell forwards together, limbs tangling together, wrestling for purchase. 

Warren came from behind, the branch in his hands colliding with the side of the monster’s head, sending it flying off of Andy. He slammed the wood into its skull, watching as it twitched and went limp against the wet ground. 

Andy lay on the ground, clutching his chest and reaching towards his neck. His eyes locked with yours. Panic stricken, wild. You knew that he was dead. They all were. As soon as one of those things got a decent grip, it was over. But that didn’t mean it was okay. It had been almost nine years, and everyone still fought like hell against the inevitable. 

Warren was crouched beside his brother, trying to stop the bleeding. He pulled off his own shirt and you winced, seeing the scars that littered his back. The same ones on both Leon and yourself.

With a hand on your bow, you pulled an arrow from your back and gently nudged Warren’s foot with your own before taking a step back.

“Warren” You warned, your voice low.

He jolted, eyes leaving his brother to meet yours, glancing between your face and the weapon in your hands. His hands pushing wet, bloody fabric into his brother’s wounds.

“I..I can’t… what?” 

“We have to do it and leave” You glanced over your shoulder at Leon, who had stepped further back, watching with a frantic gaze. “We can’t stay here. Warren, none of this is fucking easy, but Andy’s gone.” 

The older man, only twenty-three himself, looked back towards his brother. Andy’s breathing was shallow, ragged. He had already lost so much blood.

It never took long. 

Warren’s body shook as he sobbed, as he understood what you meant. You had to put Andy down, and you had to do it quickly. But his shoulders slumped and he shook his head. 

“Warren..” You warned again. “You need to step away from him..”

He huffed, breathy and wet, and crawled away from the fading remnant of his younger brother. You didn’t have to look to know that Leon was gone, probably behind a tree, hands over his ears. It was the plan. When shit hits the fan, get low and stay low. Until you call it clear.

You sighed, stringing the bow. You aimed, closed your eyes, released a quiet breath and let go. 

Andy lay limp on the ground and you hoped that wherever he ended up, it was better than this. 

Shaking your head, you whistled your signal to Leon and set your bow against a stump. The teenager came peeking out and your heart clenched at the tear tracks carving through the dirt on his face. 

“Look out!” He screamed suddenly, eyes flicking behind you. 

Before you could even register, the side of your body made contact with the ground. Looking up you saw Warren, huffing, eyes red rimmed. He held the branch again. You threw up your arms, ready to deflect the fatal blow, but it never came. 

The deep cut of a shotgun rang out through the air. And you caught the way Warren’s eyes widened and then rolled to the back of his head before he slumped to the ground beside you. Scrambling, you sprang to your feet and launched yourself towards Leon.

“Easy there little lady” an unknown voice spoke up, shotgun in hand. “I’m not gonna hurt’cha, I just need you to put your hands up”

The sound stopped you in your tracks. You could see Leon with his arms already in the air. 

Another rule: do everything you can to not get shot. Smart kid. 

You twirled back towards the man with a smirk. 

“You just killed my buddy there, not sure if I should trust you” 

The man with the gun tilted his head slightly, confused, but kept his gun trained on your form. He was older, probably mid fifties, with dark skin and dark hair that was peppered with greys.

“He was going to kill you” It came out unsure. He was right, but why?

“Occupational hazard?” You quipped back. 

He sighed and looked over his shoulder. Fuck. You were hoping you could distract him long enough to either get the gun, or at least to get Leon out of here. But if anyone else showed up, you were screwed.

“Maria!” He called out. “Over here!”

A woman came from behind him, presumably Maria. Her eyes widened at the sight. The clicker, Andy and Warren, Leon and yourself. You were almost twenty-one, but the hunger made you look closer to Leon’s age, only fourteen himself. 

Maria tapped the man on the shoulder and jerked her head, needing to speak to him. He nodded and refocused his gaze on you. 

“Don’t. Fucking. Move.” He grunted. 

You nodded, looking back at Leon and offering a small smile. They didn’t seem like raiders, or slavers. They looked clean and well fed. They didn’t look FEDRA either, but you weren’t about to test the limits of their mercy. Either way, they would either kill you or they wouldn’t. For Leon’s sake, you hoped whatever happened, if it came to it, it would be quick. 

They spoke a few feet away, glancing back towards the two of you every couple seconds. The man struggled to force his gaze away, turning back to the woman and grimacing at the words coming out of her mouth.

“Maria-” He went to grab her arm but she slinked away and came to stand before you. 

She offered her hand. You hesitantly accepted, coating her fingers in dirt and blood. She barely spared it a glance before rubbing it into the denim of her thigh. 

She smiled gently. “I’m Maria, that’s Elton” She said, motioning to the larger man behind her. She seemed tough. You felt more comfortable under her gaze, more than anyone who had looked at you in the last two years. 

You offered your name and turned towards the younger boy. “That’s Leon” You motioned for him to come over.

He took a few hesitant steps before lacing his fingers through yours and reaching his other hand towards Maria. She took his hand, shaking it. Anyone else could have missed it, but a flicker of something, maybe longing, passed over her face when she locked eyes with Leon. 

“Are you related?” Came from Elton. 

Leon’s hair was lighter than yours and his features were still coated in a thin layer of baby fat. So, most people believed that he was your brother, half at least, and you never corrected them. But, something in Maria’s eyes and the way she watched you, made you want to be honest. You shook your head.

“Known him since he was eight, been taking care of him ever since” You didn’t often talk about Leon’s biological family. They were FEDRA officials, but when rations started dwindling a few years after the outbreak, they didn’t hesitate to drop the youngest of their children off on the steps of the QZ’s orphanage. Where you had been for the last three years. 

“How old are you?” Maria asked, glancing between the two of you. 

“I’m fourteen” Leon blurted, looking up at you with wide eyes. You squeezed his hand twice. A signal you had first used in the orphanage, after you’d been beaten for stealing or for lying. Leon would sit beside you and read, occasionally squeezing your hand. You’d squeeze back twice if you wanted him to keep reading, three times if something was wrong.

“I’m twenty-one” You speak, not meeting Maria’s eyes. 

“What are you doing out here?” Elton’s voice came over Maria’s shoulders again, kinder. You realized that the two of them had to be related. Father and daughter maybe?

“It’s a really long story” You try, unsure of how to explain the last decade of your lives.

“Give us the short version” Maria tries, placing her hand on your shoulder.

“We..um..we escaped raiders before the winter…” You fumble. Yes you had been with raiders, not exactly prisoners, but these two didn’t need to know that. Not yet. Maria’s eyes softened and she looked back at Elton, who’s face betrayed him at that moment. You could tell he was confused. Not many people survived the winter the way you had done. 

“You’ve been living out here?” He asked, glancing between the makeshift shelters and your bow, the only real weapon you had. 

You nodded. “Here and there, I tried not to stay in one place too long…” 

They both nodded, movement was essential. Unless you had the means to defend yourself and your camp, it was better to stay out of the way. You’d learned that when the Phoenix QZ tore itself down. 

“Where are you from?” The question came from Leon. You know that he noticed their clothing, their guns, the way they seemed sated and well-fed. Leon always noticed details, things that a lot of other kids deemed unnecessary. 

“We come from a community”

“A QZ?”

Elton laughed at that. “Jackson’s not like a QZ. Sure we got walls and jobs, but ain’t nothin like one of those prisons” 

“Jackson?” It was your turn to ask a question.

Maria nodded. “We’re a community that helps each other out and keeps each other alive. As long as you earn your keep and stay out of trouble. You could come back with us.”

“And we should trust you? Why?” You had reason to be defensive, to be unsure of what these strangers were promising. 

“You’ll just have to find out.” Maria smiled, looking back towards Elton.

For the first time in a while, you felt something like hope. That you had survived the last year for a reason. That Leon could finally have a real home.

“Take us there” 

You felt Leon’s grip tighten. You squeezed back twice.

-

Thanks for reading!! Please like/reblog if you enjoyed <3

[toomanystoriessolittletime]

Can not believe I am celebrating 8k followers!

Thank you to everyone who clicked that follow button lately or longer ago. Special shout out to everyone who had been here since the beginning and stayed through all my hyper obsessions!

For this celebration I am hosting a mini writing challenge.

The poll I put on yesterday ran out and the majority of people voted for random fic ideas from my very long fic idea document that keeps growing every single week day.

You have no idea what you're in for LMAO

I am gonna gatekeep some of these ideas, cause I have plans for at least four of them to write them myself, but I know that most of these ideas would never see the light of day, so I am excited!

Some of the ideas are very detailed, some of the ideas are just random situations. I will pick random through a picker wheel I put to together earlier today once I receive an ask.

How this works:

The first 12 people who send me an ask get a random chosen prompt from my fic ideas document.

You can choose from the following characters:

Joel Miller

Din Djarin

Frankie Morales

Javier Peña

Javi Gutierrez

Dave York

Pero Tovar

Oberyn Martell

Matt Murdock

Dieter Bravo

Marcus Pike

Please mention if you're okay with smut prompts. There are a darkish!Oberyn, dubcon-ish Dave York and a darkish!Javi P idea in there. If you good with those, please say so or even ask for them specifically.

Fics should be posted until the end of September, can be as long or as short as you like but tag me PLEASE once you're finished so I can read it!

Looking forward to read all my silly fic ideas come to life!

[pedroshotwifey]

Dark!Recs (Pedro Characters)

Joel Miller

Bullet For You, Darlin' by @kewwrites Ongoing Series - Raider!Joel x AFAB!Reader

Sunshine by @kewwrites Ongoing Series - Dark!Joel x AFAB!Reader

Caught by @toxicanonymity One shot - Dark!Joel Miller x fem!reader

Give an Inch, Take a Mile by @thatmrmiller One shot - Dark!Joel Miller x f!reader

Twisted Love and Cruel Love by @cool-iguana Two part series - Dark!Joel Miller x reader

Unnamed Mean!Joel Drabble by @marsswann Drabble - Dark!Joel x Crybaby!reader

Perfect, Wake, and Shopping by @notjustjavierpena One shot series - Mean Sugar Daddy!Joel Miller x reader

Left in Lincoln by @toxicanonymity Series - Softdark!Joel Miller x virgin!reader

I Can Be Your Pretty Girl by @walkintotheriveranddisappear Series - Darkish!Joel Miller x fem!reader Joel is a manipulative, pushy, and pervy asshole... and I go for it every time.

Hate by @notjustjavierpena One shot - Mean!Joel Miller x f!reader

Smother by @beardedjoel Series (ongoing) - Creepy!Joel Miller x f!reader

Close Call by @toxicanonymity One shot - darkish!Joel Miller x f!reader

All I Did Was What I Had To by @corazondebeskar-reads Series (more parts tbd) - Mean!Joel Miller x f!Reader

No Soul To Sell by @atticrissfinch One shot - dark!ex-boyfriend’s dad!joel miller x fem!reader

Rebound by @springdandelixn on ao3 Short series (complete) - Dark!dbf!Joel Miller x f!reader

Din Djarin

Whispers in the Dark by @kewwrites Ongoing Series - Dark!Din Djarin x Reader

Memento Mori by @kewwrites Ongoing Series - Serialkiller!Din x Reader

To Touch Darkness by @djarincore one shot - Dark!Din Djarin x AFAB!Reader

Partners by @pedge-page One shot - forceful!Din Djarin x f!reader

Javier Peña

Gonna Make You Sweat by @mypoisonedvine One shot - Dark(kinda)DBF!Javier Peña x reader

Like the Girls in the Movies by @walkintotheriveranddisappear One shot - Pervy!Javi x afab!reader

Frankie Morales

On The Waterfront series by @beefrobeefcal Ongoing Series - Dark!Frankie Morales x Fem!reader

No Eres Tú (Soy Yo) by @iamasaddie One shot - Dark!Frankie Morales x f!reader

UPDATED 12/3/23

[tightjeansjavi]

Slow Hands | Chapter 6

“you're like a mirror, reflecting me”

A/N: it’s a double chapter weekend bby! Although, I’m not sure if that’s a good thing regarding the pain I’m about to cause. But hey, not everything can be butterflies and rainbows all the time, right? This chapter will take your emotions for a spin. There is violence and triggering themes. Tread carefully.

Summary: your first date in over twenty years doesn’t go as planned.

~word count: 5.2k~

Pairing | Joel Miller x f! reader

Warnings: angst, trauma responses, self-deprecating thoughts triggered by trauma, negative body image, trauma triggers, mentions of bodily scars, mild violence, swearing, confrontations, use of one homophobic swear from an asshat (dyke) the word rape is mentioned, panic attack, unwanted attention, hurt feelings, protective! Joel, feral! Darkish! Joel, Soft! Joel, flirting, internal thoughts, slow burn, emotional development, deep conversation, pet names, no age gap, readers nickname is beanie (coffee beans) reader has no physical descriptions (skin color/body description) +18 minors dni! Please let me know if I missed any warnings. I wanted to included the two words that can be triggering ahead of time. Please heed the warnings.

main masterlist series masterlist playlist

The last time you had ever gone on a date was a week before outbreak day. You had met the guy in line at your local grocery store and he had swooped in when you nearly dropped an entire carton of milk. That’s where you gained your catchphrase; fiddlesticks. He had taken you to a quiet cozy Italian restaurant and you remember your smile being infectious. It had been years since you dated anyone, and this guy was giving you all those warm fuzzy feelings that you so deeply yearned for. Your second date was set for September 26, 2003. You often wondered during the oddest and sudden moments if he had survived. He had called you an hour before the date informing you that he might be late because his mother was feeling ill and he was going to go check up on her. That was the last time you ever heard from him.

Now you were in your bathroom in Jackson with the comforting glow of a flickering candle on the countertop. The temperature of the shower was scalding and created a thick sheet of steam that enveloped your mirror in a dewy cloak. As the condensation began to slowly dissipate you found yourself staring into the void of your mirror. You used one hand to hold the towel wrapped around your body in place while you used your other hand to apply a bit of homemade moisturizer to your skin. A year ago you had come to Maria with the idea of creating some self-care products for the women of Jackson. From moisturizer to face wash and homemade candles. Only a handful of the women came to your home to sample the products. In the moment it had stung your heart like a thousand needles that only a few people, including Maria and Dina showed up. You just wanted to do something nice for the community. So much for trying.

You have to take the towel off eventually you know..

That inner voice that plagued your brain was fully awake now and ready to onslaught an attack on your already sensitive emotional state. You hated seeing your skin. You hated seeing all of your scars. Your body was littered in them, and while they were marks showing that you were a survivor, you still felt bile rise in your throat every time you had to look at them.

Take the towel off.

I don’t want to.

Take it off.

Joel will think you're hideous when he sees your scars.

No, he won’t. Joel isn’t like that.

No? Are you sure?

You’re ugly.

An unfinished hack job.

Stop. Please.

Please.

“Please fucking stop.” You nearly whimpered as you stared back at your broken reflection. The towel dropped from your grip and you immediately clung to the porcelain sink. Your knuckles ached from how hard you were gripping the edges of the sink.

An ugly, worthless, waste of goddamn space and air.

Tears began to freely fall as you forced yourself to look at the scars that littered your body like a torn, shredded canvas. As soon as your fingertips lightly brushed the jagged scar that curved under the swell of your left breast, you fell back into the wall, sinking down with a gut-wrenching sob that shattered you to the core.

You weren’t sure how many hours had passed but it must have been a couple hours because you could faintly hear someone knocking on your front door. Joel did say he would walk with you to The Tipsy Bison at 8pm. Had you really been sitting on the floor, naked and trembling for that long?

In a haste you scrambled to your feet despite your knees feeling like wobbling jello. You snatched the towel up from the ground and quickly wrapped it back around yourself. You dressed your body in a fury as you struggled to pull a pair of jeans over your damp thighs. You threw on whatever clean t-shirt you had along with a flannel. You paused at the mouth of your closet, staring at a dress that Maria had gifted to you during your first Christmas in Jackson. It was so beautiful, delicate, and dainty. You dreamed of having the confidence to wear it one day. It was too pretty to be collecting dust like this. Your fingers brushed across the soft material with a heavy sigh. Maybe one day, but that day was not today.

fiddlesticks.

Joel was occupying himself outside on your porch while he waited for you. He went from pacing the length of the porch, to sitting on one of the steps with his hands resting between his thighs. He went the extra mile to actually style his hair and wear a shirt that wasn’t completely faded. As much as he denied that this was in fact a date, he knew in his heart that it was, and he wanted to look his absolute best for you. He felt embarrassed with how fast he rose to his feet when he heard the lock to your front door click open. He had a small bouquet of wildflowers clutched gently in his hand. Maria had helped him pick them and use a bit of twine to hold them together.

He rubbed the back of his neck nervously as his gaze landed upon your frame leaning in the open doorway.

Wow, he thought silently to himself.

She is so beautiful.

“Hey, I hope I didn’t rush ya or anythin.’ I didn’t wanna be late either, although time doesn’t really exist anymore, huh?” He stammered as his palms began to sweat. “You–look beautiful. I hope that’s not too straightforward, but what kinda gentleman would I be if I didn’t compliment ya. Sorry, i’m ramblin’ off the fuckin’ walls.” He shook his head to the side with a nervous chuckle. “Brought these for ya. Maria helped me pick ‘em. Tried to be careful n’not smash ‘em.”

You almost felt a sense of relief over the realization that Joel was just as nervous as you were. He looked like he was about to combust as he held the bouquet of flowers towards you.

“Joel, you didn’t rush me. I just..lost track of time.” You softly spoke with a reassuring smile as you gently removed the bouquet from his grasp. “Thank you, you don’t clean up so bad either. Did you do something different with your hair? I like it. These are beautiful.” You brought the flowers up to your face as you inhaled their sweet floral scent.

Joel could feel the heat rise to his cheeks as he shoved his hands deep into the pockets of his jeans. “Yeah, I uh–jus’ wanted to look nice for the occasion. The Tipsy Bison is quite the high end establishment y’know.” He teased. It felt nice to crack a joke through his brewing nerves.

“Oh? Well, I hope I am dressed for the occasion. Let me just go put these in some water and then we can head out.”

“Darlin.’” He breathed softly like the gentle warm breeze, “You are most definitely dressed for the occasion.”

You mustered up a convincing smile before quietly slipping behind the door to the kitchen. You grabbed a spare vase from the cabinet and filled it up with a bit of water before gently placing the bouquet inside the vase. You left it on the center of the counter before you met Joel outside on the porch once more. After locking your door, he had offered you his elbow which you gratefully took. Your hand gently wrapped around his bare bicep as you walked down the steps together. The sun had just begun to set as the buzzards sang their tune, and the fireflies twinkled luminously, dancing on either side of your heads.

Joel was counting the amount of steps to the Tipsy Bison silently inside of his mind while you were counting out-loud all of the fireflies that you could see.

The bar was rowdy, but that was expected. It was the one establishment in Jackson where people could let their hair down and have fun. It was a slice of normalcy that both the young and old could enjoy.

Joel could sense your hesitation as he went to reach for the heavy-set door handle. He turned to you with a gentle expression on his weathered features. “Hey, we ain’t gotta stay for long, okay? S’okay with me. If you’re not havin’ a good time, we can leave.” He murmured. Joel wanted to make sure that you were aware that he wouldn’t be offended if you did want to leave. He just wanted you to feel comfortable and most importantly, safe.”

You responded by gently squeezing his bicep as you looked over at him. “Joel, thank you, but I'll be alright. Let's just go in and have a good time, okay? You still owe me that dance.” Your voice floated sweetly to his ears like a song.

“Don’t think I've gone and forgotten that darlin.’ I’m very much lookin’ forward to it.” He grinned.

Me too.

His hand grasped around the handle as he pushed it open, allowing you to step inside first before he followed suit behind you. You could feel the pads of his fingertips brush across your covered lower back as he maneuvered you past a group of people. His close proximity was nearly intoxicating your senses as you got a proper inducing whiff of his scent. Pine, gunsmoke, and soap with a hint of..cologne? He wasn’t kidding when he said he wanted to look nice for the occasion.

“Well, look what the cat dragged in!” Tommy remarked from behind the bar as he slipped past one of the patrol guys. He hugged his brother first, giving him a light clap on the shoulder before he turned to you. “Ain’t you lookin’ like such a peach this evenin’ Beanie. Can I getcha guys somethin’ to drink?”

Joel hugged his brother back with a light slap to his back before he pulled back one of the bar stools for you. “I’ll jus’ take a beer, and for you darlin?’ Y’want anythin?’” Joel asked you as you quietly thanked him for pulling the stool out before you sat down.

“I’ll have a beer as well.”

“You betcha. Two beers comin’ right up!” Tommy spoke an octave louder so he could hear over the music and chatter.

Two full, nearly overflowing glasses of beer were placed in front of you and Joel as he took the unoccupied seat beside you. He lifted his glass towards yours, gently clinking them together before he brought his lips to the rim of the glass and took a sip.

You mirrored his actions before setting the glass down in front of you. The beer was decent, better than you had expected it to taste. Then again, did anyone really ever drink beer for the taste? You were more of a wine person yourself. “So, this is the infamous Tipsy Bison?” You mused as you looked over at Joel as he set his glass down.

“Yep, she ain’t much, but it’s nice t’see people get together and have fun. A taste of normalcy, y’know? How’s the beer tastin?’”

“Definitely a taste of normalcy. It’s actually..pretty good? I wasn’t a big beer person before the outbreak, but maybe this is me turning over a new leaf?” You shrugged as you glanced up at him over the rim of your glass.

“Tommy perfected the recipe for it pretty well. The whiskey ain’t too shabby either. Glad that you’re enjoyin’ it darlin.’” He nodded in your direction as he took another sip from his glass. He leaned in close then so that it would be easier for you to hear him. “So, while I was out on patrol today, I finally wrote a letter to Tess. Ripped the bandaid off and everythin.’”

“Joel, that’s wonderful. How do you feel after writing it? Does it feel like there’s a weight that has been lifted from your shoulders?” He had your full and undivided attention as you gently rested your palm on the top of his hand for a gesture of comfort.

“I feel..better? Like I ain’t carryin’ all this heavy burden with me. I poured my heart out on the paper, just like ya told me to. It was hard. Like, really fuckin’ hard. I felt like I was forgivin’ myself in the process, n’lettin’ her go. That’s the main reason why I wanted ya to accompany me tonight. I was seekin’ some comfort.” He admitted softly as his eyes glanced down to where your hand rested upon his.

“Of course it was hard, it’s never easy to be vulnerable like that. I’m really proud of you for takin’ that step, Joel.” You softly responded with a small lopsided smile. “Well, you know I'm here for you regardless of the circumstances. I have to thank you.”

“For what?” He was leaned in so close now, you could nearly feel his warm breath fanning your cheeks.

“For encouraging me to go out and have a good time. I wanted to say no to your offer earlier. I was thinking of every possible way that I could get out of having to socialize like this. Joel, you’re that extra push that I didn’t realize I really fucking needed.” It wasn’t easy for you to be vulnerable like this either. You were practically throwing your heart into Joel’s weathered palms, hoping that he would hold it tenderly. There was that nagging voice trying to convince you that this was all good to be true. It poked and prodded at you, but for the first time in a long-time, you drowned the voice out.

“You ain’t gotta thank me for that darlin.’ I’ve encouraged you yeah, but at the end of the day, you’re in control of your own actions, ain’t ya? Let's make a toast to you, Beanie. Undeniably the most beautiful woman in this whole goddamn town, with a heart made of pure fuckin’ gold. I’m so happy that you exist, darlin.’ You make my life jus’ a little bit brighter.”

His eyes were twinkling dazzingly under the warm glow of the dangling fairy lights. He had no idea just how terribly you needed to hear that.

He was so happy that you exist.

You made his life brighter.

You did that.

You threw your arms around his neck gently, hugging him so tightly he felt like you were stealing the oxygen from his lungs. His arms were looping around your waist, hands splayed out across your back as he hugged you back. He got a whiff of your sweet syrupy fragrance. You smelled of saccharine peaches and honey. You smelled of home.

I could kiss him right now. I could press my lips to his and pretend that every breath that I take, I feel like I'm dying. If I kiss him now, maybe breathing won’t feel like a chore. Maybe then I'll be okay. Maybe the voices will stop, and the curtain will fall. If I kiss him now, maybe everything will fall into place. You thought to yourself as you felt the wiry patches of his beard gently scrape across your cheek as his grip around you tightened.

If I kiss her now..everything changes. If I kiss her, that means I have to keep my promise to do better. If I kiss her now, my thoughts will be consumed with her. If I kiss her now, I'll always protect her. I’ll keep her safe. If I kiss her now, I won’t be able to stop.

His eyes fluttered shut as the sounds of laughter and chatter were drowned out by his thoughts. He pressed the faintest kiss to the side of your head, just nearly grazing your temple before he slowly pulled away. You both were looking at each other like you were the only two people in the room.

He gestured towards the makeshift dance floor in the middle of the bar with a tilt of his chin. “Still wanna have that dance with me?” He rasped softly.

You were already reaching for his hand once more as you slipped off the stool. “Show me your moves, Texas.” You shot him a bold, mildly flirtatious wink as you pulled him to the dance floor. Some country folk song was being played by the live band made up of 3 men and 1 woman. You didn’t know the words to the song, but that didn’t matter. Not when Joel was delicately holding hand in his and twirling you playfully. His eyes crinkled in the corners like creases on a well-loved book. His dimples were even peeking through and making an appearance.

You both made one another feel effortlessly young again.

By the fifth song, your feet were beginning to ache and you desperately needed to pee, so Joel gently released you from his grip as he was left to his own devices. He finished off his beer when he noticed Ellie and Dina slowly swaying together. From where he was standing, he could see his kiddo blush under the fairylights as Dina whispered something in her ear. When Dina kissed Ellie for the first time, his heart felt warm. Ellie and him might not be on the best of terms, but he just wanted to see her happy and loved. It all came to a crashing halt when Seth intervened on their moment with a harsh hateful tongue.

“Jus’ what this town needs, another loud mouth dyke.” The older man spat with disgust.

Ellie had whipped around in a fury, storming right up to Seth with her finger pointed at his chest in an accusing manner. “The fuck did you just say?”

Dina was already stepping in front of her, trying to talk her down when Joel sprung into action. He couldn’t help it. His blood was absolutely boiling as he shoved Seth roughly. “Get the hell outta here. Don’t you fuckin’ talk to my kid like that. Y’hear me?!” Joel wasn’t fucking around, not in the slighest.

“Y’get your hands off me!” Seth spat back as he stumbled from the force of Joel shoving him. Maria ultimately had to step in between the two of them as she led Seth outside to cool it off.

Joel’s fists were clenched tightly at his sides and his jaw was as sharp as glass. His face softened when his gaze landed upon Dina and Ellie as he approached. “Y’alright kiddo?”

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Ellie hissed as she faced him with a disappointed look etched across her face.

Joel struggled to hold his composure as Ellie’s words stung like a poisoned blade piercing his gut. “He had no right. He had no fuckin’ right Ellie.” He tried to reason with her.

“And you do?!” Ellie responded exasperatedly as Dina was trying yet again to pull her away from the confrontation. “I don’t need your fuckin’ help, Joel.” Ellie knew her words were harsh, and she knew they would hurt him, but she was exhausted and frustrated that he lied to her for so long.

Joel’s face fell as he slowly looked around the bar to find faces staring back at him. He cleared his throat as he slowly backed off, “right.” He mumbled quietly.

He wasn’t able to mourn his hurt feelings for very long when he heard a scream. Not just any scream, your scream. A frightened, blood curdling scream that rattled his bones and sent hot blood rushing through his veins as he took off towards the bathrooms.

His pulse rose to a high level as he shoved open the women’s bathroom door in a haste. The last thing he expected was to find you violently thrashing on the ground while Tommy was desperately trying to calm you down.

“DON’T TOUCH ME!” You cried out desperately as you clawed at Tommy’s arms.

DON’T FUCKING TOUCH ME! DON’T TOUCH ME!” You wailed as Tommy was gently yet firmly holding your wrist in his grasp.

“BEANIE!” Tommy yelled equally as desperate. “It’s me. It’s Tommy. You’re safe–”

Joel was on his knees in an instant as he physically pushed his brother out of the way, forcing Tommy to release his grip on your wrists as you scrambled back towards the sinks, fear laced in your irises as you tried to tuck yourself into the corner.

“Tommy, what the fuck happened?!” Joel whispered harshly. He didn’t want to yell and freak you out any further than you already were. He knew that he needed to remain calm for your sake.

“Fuck if I know Joel! I heard her screamin’ and came in here and she was just thrashing on the ground. She was mumblin’ to herself about someone touchin’ her.” Tommy responded with a harsh breath as he raked his fingers through his hair.

“Who touched her, Tommy.” Joel’s voice dropped an octave. He sounded calm, and menacing all at once. His pupils were already turning a shade darker as his jaw clenched so tightly, Tommy was afraid it would break.

“She said that Lucas stopped her on the way to the bathroom. They were chatting and when she tried to leave, he–”

“He what. What the fuck did he do to her Tommy.” His face trembled with burning rage as he struggled to keep his yelling at bay.

“He grabbed her. I don’t know if it was in a suggestive way or what. All I know is she flipped out after the fact and then this is how I found her.”

Joel released a shuddered breath as his eyes fluttered shut for a moment. His nostrils flared as he exhaled. He could feel the adrenaline pumping in his veins already as he stood back up. His heart shattered when he saw your entire body facing away from him as he quietly and hesitantly approached.

You heard the creak in his knees as he crouched down a few feet away from you.

“Beanie, hey. Honey, it’s Joel. Can you..look at me please darlin?’” His tone was lengths softer than it previously was with Tommy. He made no attempt to try and touch you in your vulnerable state.

You slowly turned your chin over your shoulder, struggling to make eye contact with him as your eyes nervously darted around the room. You were desperately trying to find something to focus on in an attempt to ground yourself.

“Beanie, focus on me honey. You’re okay. You’re safe now. It’s jus’ me and Tommy in here. No one else is comin’ in, okay? I promise.” He murmured reassuringly.

When your gaze finally landed upon him, his heart shattered right down the middle. Splintered off into a million tiny fucking pieces. You looked terrified.

“Please don’t touch me, Joel.” You croaked out above a whisper.

“I ain’t gonna touch you without your permission Beanie. You have my word.” His eyes stayed locked on yours in a softened look as he waited for you to give him permission to approach further.

When I get my hands on this motherfucker, I'm gonna kill him. Gonna make him wish he was never born.

A total of ten minutes had passed by before you were slowly and hesitantly scooting from your makeshift hiding spot between the sinks. Your face was puffy and blotchy with tears as you reached for Joel’s hands. “I’m–I'm sorry. I–I didn’t mean to cause such a scene.” You mumbled as he gently grasped your hands in his.

“Beanie, you did nothin’ wrong at all, honey. This is not your fault.” Joel was careful with his word choice.

“He didn’t–he didn’t even–we were just talking and–” fresh tears were beginning to brew along your waterline as you struggled to form a coherent sentence.

Joel released your hands for a brief moment before you felt his skin make contact with yours once more. His calloused palms came to gently rest around your cheeks as he held your face in his hands so delicately. “You listen to me, alright? I don’t care if y’all were jus’ talkin.’ Hell, I don’t care if y’all were flirtin.’ He had no right to touch you Beanie. No right at all. Doesn’t matter what the circumstances were, he put his hands on ya, and that ain’t right.” He whispered firmly as you leaned into his soft touch subconsciously. “I need you..to stay in here with Tommy, okay? He’s gonna take care of ya for a minute and i’ll be right back, okay? I’ll be right back for ya baby.”

Baby.

He pressed a featherlight kiss to your temple before he slowly dropped his hands from your face as he stood up. Tommy placed his hand along his shoulder to try and stop him. Tommy knew his brother well enough to know what he was about to go do. As a mediator, he couldn’t let that happen.

“Joel..” Tommy warned him under his breath as he tightened his grip around his shoulder.

“Don’t Tommy. Don’t fuckin’ tell me what to do. I need you to get her a glass of water, and then just sit here with her. Don’t leave her alone, y’hear me? I will go take care of this.” It wasn’t a suggestion, it was a demand from the older Miller brother.

“Joel, y’know I can’t let you go’n do that.” Tommy sighed.

“Don’t care. Goin’ to do it anyway.” Joel bit back as he yanked his shoulder from his brother's grip and slipped past the bathroom door that was left ajar.

Most of the bar-goers had gone home for the evening, including Dina and Ellie. The patrol guys were still out, and Joel was seeing red when he saw Lucas laughing with Cody and the rest of the guys. His footsteps were heavy along the wooden floors as he approached. He loomed over the table as his calloused hands came to rest along the back of the chair Lucas was presently sitting in. “Get the fuck up.” Joel hissed behind him.

“Joel? What the hell man, what’s the problem?” Lucas craned his head upwards towards the older man.

“I said, GET THE FUCK UP!” Joel’s voice boomed as Lucas’s face fell.

“Hey man, no need for a’that–” He was caught off guard when Joel yanked him up from the lapels of his jacket. “When I fuckin’ tell you to do somethin’, you do it. You don’t fuckin’ question my orders ever. Y’hear me boy?!” his voice was laced with venom as he dragged the younger man away from the table.

“Joel, get the fuck off of me! What the hell is the meanin’ of this?!” Lucas barked back as he was dragged out the door and into the alley. His shoulder ached painfully when Joel shoved him with all of his force against the stone wall.

“Y’fuckin’ touch her?! HUH?! Answer me!” Joel demanded as he yanked him by his jacket once more.

“WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKIN’ ABOUT JOEL!” Lucas bit back as he attempted to push Joel off of him. Despite the older man's age, he still overpowered Lucas without breaking a sweat as he flipped him around with his arms painfully twisted behind his back, and the side of his face scraping against the wall, drawing beads of blood to the wounded surface.

“Don’t make me fuckin’ ask you again. Did you fuckin’ touch Beanie?!” He growled as he twisted his arms further. “Fuckin’ answer me, Lucas!”

“Are you fuckin’ insinuatin’ that I raped her?! For fuck sakes Joel! I grabbed her fuckin’ arm and she flipped! That’s all I did!” He cried out as he thrashed against the wall. “That’s all I did man, I swear!” He pleaded.

“Y’grabbed her arm?! That’s it?!” Joel bellowed threateningly.

“I swear, that’s all I did man! She was walkin’ away and I grabbed her arm to tell ‘er that she looked nice, and she freaked out! She’s fuckin–” His voice was caught in his throat when Joel had twisted his right wrist at such an unnatural angle, the bone had snapped from the pressure and sent the younger man buckling over in pain as he sank down into the wall.

“You never fuckin’ lay your hands on her again. Y’hear me?! Fuckin’ touch her again, and i’ll break the other one.” Joel hissed as he grabbed ahold of the back of his head and yanked it harshly. “Y’touch her again, and i'll kill you with my bare hands. Do I make myself clear?” He growled against the younger man’s ear before releasing his head with a firm shove forward. “Go the fuck home before I change my mind.” He spat with disgust.

Lucas was scrambling to his feet in a hurry as he cradled his broken wrist in his good hand. He took one look at Joel before he shoved past him.

Joel waited until he could no longer see his shadowy silhouette in the distance before he returned to the bar. Inside he found you sitting on one of the stools with a cup of water held in your trembling hands, and a light blanket resting along your shoulders. Maria was on your left, and Tommy was on your right.

“I’ll make sure she gets home safe.” Joel announced as he approached with his hand outstretched towards you.

You slowly lifted your chin upwards to look at him. Your lower lip wobbled as you slowly slipped off the stool and placed your clammy palm in his. If only you had known what he had just done to Lucas in the alley minutes ago. Would you be afraid?

Joel acknowledged Tommy and Maria with a tight nod as he laced his fingers through yours. He whispered softly to you that everything was going to be okay, but you didn’t hear him.

The walk back to your home was in dead silence sans the crickets chirping and the leaves along the tree branches gently swaying in the breeze. You hadn’t spoken a single word as Joel gently sat you down on the couch. He made you a cup of tea that he tirelessly tried to coax you to drink, but you wouldn’t budge. You were closing in on yourself faster than he could keep up.

He is now sitting alongside you, playing with his fingers nervously. When you finally spoke, he could barely detect your voice from how soft and timid you sounded. His face fell for the third time that night from the words you uttered.

“Please leave, Joel.” Your voice cracked as your throat was rubbed raw from how hard you had been screaming.

“Beanie..” He softly pleaded with you.

“Joel, please. I need you to leave.” You whispered.

The couch creaked from his weight lifting from the cushions. He didn’t have much fight left in him after the night's events. What was supposed to be an evening filled with fun, drastically changed in a blink of an eye. He respected your wishes as his boots padded softly to the front door. He paused as he pushed down on the door handle, praying that you’d change your mind and ask him to stay. You didn’t, so he left.

He was greeted to an empty home. No lights on. No shitty puns. No Ellie. No you.

He cried himself to ruin in the shower with the water beating down on his back like a million ice shards. His sobs wrecked through his entire being as the weight of his actions crushed into his spine like a tumultuous wave. He had failed once again.

Banners made by the lovely @saradika 🤎

[toxicanonymity]

stuffing.

5.7k words, Joel x f!reader x Tommy | sequel here! A/N: ONE SHOT. I had to get this out of my system after that one Uncle Tommy line I wrote in september lol. Shoutouts to: @bonezone44 for being an Uncle Tommy stan, @/walkintotheriveranddisappear for running the center for dvp excellence, and everyone who's been supportive. 🖤 Multiple fic recs at the bottom! WARNINGS: I8+, big girthy age gap, darkish miller bros, dubcon (coaxing/pressure, you aren't sure what Joel allows), use of "daddy," sharing, unsafe p in v (individually and together), oral, jacking off, creampies, cucking, MFM, DP (double vag), light degradation, praise, pet names, foot massage. AU where you don't overthink this fic. You’re happy with Joel, but it’s not a healthy relationship with clear communication and boundaries. Joel carries reader. TW: incidental incest via MFM/DVP - If this isn't for you, please quietly move along.

📢 Orgs to consider donating to for t-giving: alight (refugee support), cultural survival (indigenous rights advocacy)

🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂🍂

Joel squats down with one hand on the back of your chair. He admires your face then cups your cheek. “Gotta do somethin’, baby. Won’t be back tonight.” The casual announcement makes your heart race.  He kisses you on the forehead, then stands up. 

“What do you mean you won’t be back tonight?”

“It’s okay, baby. Uncle Tommy’s gonna stay with ya.”

Your face gets hot. Tommy tilts his head down and smiles at you from across the breakfast table. He raises his glass of juice in acknowledgement, but you don’t look at him. You look squarely at Joel, caught off guard by his plans.

“Daddy,” you whine. “Just lemme come with you.” 

“Ain’t that kinda trip, darlin’.” 

“Why can’t he do it?”

Tommy laughs silently and his voice goes up an octave. “What’sa matter, sweetheart? Don’t wanna hang out?” He tilts his head and smiles, then his normal voice returns. “That’s okay.” There's a glimmer in his eye. 

Joel grabs his jacket and kisses you goodbye, then says, “Don’t have too much fun without me,” and winks at Tommy. Then Joel's gone, just like that. Your tummy feels nervous as his truck starts, then drives away. 

-

It's Thanksgiving week. You have a lot to be thankful for. Joel loves you and takes good care of you. You have solar power and a nice farm with a secure perimeter. Tommy is visiting for the holiday. You met Tommy in passing long ago, but his girl at the time was with him, and that was before you were Joel’s. You were just the girl down the street. This week is the first time you've really spent time together. 

Joel would kill any other man for touching you, but apparently he's different about Tommy.  You're still figuring out how that works.  Joel doesn't seem to mind what Tommy sees–or feels–when the three of you are together.  But what about when you're alone? 

Does Joel know Tommy walked by the bedroom window and saw you undressing? Does he know Tommy came to apologize for that when you were fresh out of the shower, and saw you in a towel? Or that he looked you up and down, asked if Joel was treating you right, then gave a low whistle and adjusted himself before he left? Or that you touched yourself almost as soon as he closed the door?

*******

Last night, Joel put you in Tommy's lap in the armchair to give you a foot massage, and you tried not to react when Tommy got hard. “It's ok,” Tommy whispered with his hands on your hips. He pulled you back against his hard bulge with a soft grunt and it gave you a shock of desire. 

“It's ok, darlin,” Joel echoed, kneeling at your feet. Joel placed your heel on his own hardening package as he worked on the ball of your foot. 

Tommy's hand cupped your breast and you tensed. 

Joel glanced up. “Relax, baby. It's just Uncle Tommy.” 

“It's ok,” Tommy whispered again into your hair as his other hand crept up your thigh, higher and higher, until his thumb grazed your panties. Joel continued massaging you, unbothered, then switched to the other foot. 

Tommy's thick fingers glided over your panties and you twitched as he felt the dampness. He lifted his hips with a soft grunt, then cleared his throat.  “gonna take care of your girl tonight, Joel? She's drippin’ like a faucet.”  Your cheeks burned, and Tommy ran his hand down your thigh. 

Joel smiled with half his mouth as he glanced up. “makin’ a mess already?” Joel shook his head.  “Close your legs, darlin'.” 

Your stomach dropped and you stammered, “sorry, uh . . .”

But as soon as you closed your legs, Tommy lifted your dress up, making your whole body tingle with goosebumps. Joel’s face gave away nothing as he looked past you at Tommy.  For a moment, you thought Tommy had gone too far. Then Joel hooked his fingers into the waistband of your panties, and Tommy held you back against his chest as Joel slid them off. Joel spread your knees, and Tommy's, and knelt between them, closer. 

With his armpits resting over your thighs, Joel looked at your cunt hungrily and spread you open with his thumbs. You tilted your hips for him, feeling yourself gush. “Good girl,” he murmured, then planted his right forearm on your lower belly. With his right fingers pointing down, he ran them through your dripping folds, then drew in a deep breath through his nose before bringing his mouth between your legs. 

Joel lapped at your weeping hole and sucked your clit. He fingered you and made out with your cunt like it was just another night, like he was getting ready to fuck you. Meanwhile, Tommy lightly grinded into your ass, breathing warm and wet into your hair and holding you gently in his strong arms as Joel devoured your pussy. Tommy rocked you gently on his lap, rocking you into Joel’s mouth. Joel ate you out at the same rhythm.  When you came, Tommy’s arousal pressed harder against you and he grabbed your breast. He cooed, “good girl.”  

Joel didn't seem to mind, and it felt really good, but you got self conscious after you finished. Tommy caressed your arm as Joel wiped his mouth off. “I'm sleepy, daddy,” you looked at him with big eyes.

Joel looked at you fondly, squeezed your thigh, and said, “I know, darlin’. Give Uncle Tommy a kiss goodnight.”  You turned around and kissed him on the cheek, then mumbled “goodnight” without meeting his eyes. 

—

Joel scooped you up in his arms. You went to bed with Joel and only Joel. As soon as he laid you down, you asked, “you're not mad about Tommy touching me?”

“Felt good, didn't it?” 

You gave a small nod. 

“Nice havin’ four hands.” Joel raised his eyebrows and left it at that. 

You eyed the protrusion in his jeans. “I'm comin’, baby,” he reassured you as he unzipped them. He pulled his jeans and boxers down together and his massive erection sprang free. He prowled across the bed, settled between your legs, and you raised your knees, tilting your hips for him. “Good girl,” he whispered as he got himself into place. 

“God damn, even wetter now,” he muttered as he gathered your slick on his fingers and wiped it on his stiff cock. His tip prodded your dripping hole, then he pushed inside with a sigh, making you moan as he split you open. Joel bottomed out, and the sound that came out of his chest was somewhere between a grunt and a groan, “Uungghh.” You whimpered in pleasure. Then, through the thin wall, you heard Tommy cum with a deep moan. Joel chuckled, then bowed his head and kissed you, pausing all the way inside. 

Joel kissed you softly as he buried his length in you, and your lips broke away only to whimper, “Daddy.”

“Yeah, baby doll,” he whispered into the pillow, right by your ear. “Daddy’s here.” You wrapped your legs around him as he fucked you deep and slow. You imagined Tommy lying behind you, grinding against you, whispering “good girl,” copping a feel as Joel fucked you.  You moaned and whimpered under Joel as he brought you to the brink again.  Then, as your wet little pussy fluttered around his cock, he groaned and bottomed out to fill you with his seed. 

**********

Now it’s morning, Joel's gone, and you're left alone with his brother. His brother with the sweet smile, soft voice, and big dick that felt so hard against you. Don't have too much fun without me, Joel said. . . With a wink.   Unsure what to do with that, you avoid Tommy for most of the day, and he doesn't make you hang out with him. He works in the yard and you catch a few glimpses. He gets hot and takes off his flannel, exposing his wifebeater and oversized belt buckle. As he dabs his forehead with his shirt, his bicep swells and the veins on his hand bulge.

Tommy comes in and takes a shower in the other bathroom. There’s a knock on your bedroom door, then it opens. You’re not sure why you didn’t lock it. Tommy’s wearing jeans, boxers, and nothing else. Your eyes linger on his strong chest. He leans with his hand against the door frame. “Think Joel would let me borrow a shirt? Wasn’t plannin’ to work up a sweat,” he chuckles. 

Tommy crosses his muscular arms over his thick, bare chest as you get a white t-shirt out of Joel's dresser and toss it to him. Tommy’s jeans ride down as he lifts his arms and puts the shirt on in front of you. He catches you looking as his head comes through the hole, then he rakes his fingers through his curls. A subtle smile forms, his eyes twinkle, and he gives you a little nod before he walks away. 

—

Later, you're taking a bath. You sigh as you sink into the water. Then there's a click as the doorknob lock is effortlessly picked. The door opens and Tommy smiles at you with his eyes, biting his bottom lip. He closes the door behind him. The tub squeaks as you quickly pull up your knees to cover your breasts. 

“Musta been touchin’ yourself, huh?” he chuckles as he approaches the tub. “Don't stop on my account.” He winks and his eyes fall on your legs. You scooch them closer together in case he can see through the bathwater. 

Your chest feels warm. You look down and away.

Tommy takes a seat on the tiled floor in front of the garden tub. “C’mon sweetheart, don't be shy.” his arm moves out of view, unbuttoning his jeans. Your nipples harden. He tilts his head to peek from the side and smiles. 

“What do you want?” you ask softly and a low squeak echoes as you shift in the tub. 

“Wanna see ya do it. Go on, finish what ya started.”  

“I wasn't.”

“There's no shame in it, sweetheart”

You swallow and look down.

He studies your face and repeats, “Nothin' to be ‘shamed of. You know that. Right?”

“Tell your brother that,” you whisper and instantly regret it. You pinch your eyes shut and add, “No, don't. . .Please.”

“Oh shit,” Tommy whispers. “Ya can’t, can ya?” 

You barely shake your head, eyes still closed. 

Tommy chuckles. “Controlling fucker, ain't he?” 

You look at Tommy and your eyes widen with some defiant glimmer of hope. “God damn,” he whispers. “keepin’ his girl from touchin’ herself.” He looks down and shakes his head in disapproval.  

He smiles apologetically.  “Guess Daddy knows best, huh?” He tugs his jeans off, and you watch unabashed.  As his pants come off, his boxers ride down, exposing his short, dark pubic hair. You can’t help but admire the way his thigh muscles swell out from his boxers.  

He palms himself over the fabric and raises his eyebrows. “Wanna see it, don’t ya?” He smiles knowingly at you. 

You don’t answer. He shows you anyway, pulling the waistband down under his balls. He's neatly trimmed and his balls are big. He's engorged but not fully hard. 

“Do me a favor and spit in my hand, sweetheart.” He holds it out in front of you. You look back and forth between his eyes, then his freckles. He's a handsome man. His hand stays there, waiting patiently. You gather saliva in your mouth, tilt your head forward, and let it drop into his palm. 

“Good girl,” he murmurs. 

He wraps his hand around his cock and You look into the bath water as his eyes devour your body. In the corner of your eye, you can see him at full mast. He breathes heavier, then moves positions. He sits with his right side against the tub, facing you. He strokes himself with his left hand and dips his right hand into the water. You flinch away then try to relax.  The backs of Tommy’s fingers graze your calf under the water. You squeeze your thighs together. 

“Don't get shy on me now, cupcake.” He reaches behind your calf and touches the back of your leg, near your ass.  Your legs involuntarily part.  He wouldn't do anything Joel wouldn't like. Would he? Somehow the tension of the situation is only making you want it more.  His fingers creep between your legs and caress your inner thigh crease. He sucks in a chest full of air, then gets on his knees. He brings his left hand to your mouth again for lube. 

“Good girl.”  The squelch of his hand around his cock echoes with the new moisture.  He searches your face as half his mouth breaks into a smile.  He holds your inner thigh as he jacks off. Then he straightens your leg so he can see your body better. “God damn,” he murmurs, and the sound of his voice is sharpened by the tile. He rubs your thigh, spits into his other hand, keeps tugging at his cock, then when he's close, he gets up and sits on the edge of the tub. It’s impossible not to look at his stiff, angry cock, glistening with your combined saliva. You still have one knee bent above the water–the knee furthest from him. 

He pumps himself and stands up to face you. “You wanna know how I taste?” He asks. 

You hesitantly shake your head no, unsure if it would be crossing a line.  “Okay, sweetheart. Don't have to.” He aims his cock at the water over your lap, then closes his eyes and groans. “Ohh, God. ohhhh,” it lands sharply in your ears as he erupts. Silky ropes of cum dance in the water, some of it wrapping around your thigh. When he's finished, he pulls his boxers back up, then his jeans, but doesn't zip them up. He sits on the edge of the tub again, leans over it, and kisses you on the forehead. Then he whispers in your ear, “I'll make dinner.” 

—-

You eat together at the kitchen table. There's a cornucopia centerpiece.  The scant conversation is about winter and gardening, until he reaches  under the table and squeezes your thigh. You want him so bad, you blurt out, “what’s happening?” 

He replies, “Huh?” with his hand still on your thigh. 

You search Tommy’s face. “You said it yourself, he’s controlling.” You shift in your chair and he takes his hand back. You continue,  “Why doesn’t he care if you. . .” 

“Ah,” Tommy smiles down at his plate. “Well. . .”  He turns his chair to face you instead of the table. He sits back and manspreads, and his hands rest on his thighs. “I’m just another body to love ya with, sugar.”  His eyes drift to the cornucopia. “And I sure am thankful for it.” 

His eyes return to you, and your heart flutters. 

“He can love on ya when he ain’t here, even.” One of his hands slides up his own thigh to rest closer to his groin. He takes in a deep breath through his nose and nods, admiring you as he slowly exhales. His eyes are darker. 

A desperate want is stirring in your belly. It seems too good to be true. You abruptly announce, “I’m tired. I’m gonna go to bed.”

“Okay, cupcake. C’mere,” Tommy opens his arms. 

You stand between his legs, bend forward, put your arms around his neck and kiss him on the cheek.  As you pull your head back, his hands on your hips pull you into sitting on his thigh. He brings a hand to your cheek, and it melts you. “I wouldn’t do nothin’ he wouldn’t want,” he reassures you.

You nod. 

“End up on the wrong side of the dirt,” he chuckles. When you don’t laugh, he clarifies, “Me, not you. He’d never hurt ya, cupcake.” 

Then he cradles your head with both hands, studying your eyes and lips.  He wets his lips, and your lips part, watching him. Half his mouth twitches. You’re warm all over. He leans in and looks at your mouth again, getting closer. When you can practically feel the heat of his lips on yours, you close the gap and feel a rush of need when your mouths come together. His lips are soft, and the kiss is tender. You pull away after two seconds. 

“Goodnight,” you whisper. 

—---

You lie in bed missing Joel, wishing he would come home.  You feel more at ease with the two of them.  Your mind drifts to Tommy.  At this rate, you wish he would stay.  You’re almost asleep when the bedroom door creaks open. 

“Daddy?” When you turn over, the moonlit silhouette is Tommy's. He's only wearing boxers and there's already a tent in them. He lifts the covers, and the mattress dips under his weight. 

You ask, “What are you doing?”

“'S’okay, cupcake, I told ya. Promise he won’t be mad.”

“How do you know for sure?”

“Your daddy and I been sharin’ our toys for fifty years.”

Your stomach turns, but Tommy adds,  “You're the most special of all, ya know.” He scoots closer. “Never seen him in love before.” 

You feel your body warming and opening up for him. 

“He wants ya to get what ya need, baby,” Tommy whispers. 

Your heart pounds. 

“Even told me your secret word,” Tommy adds. 

“He did?”

“If ya really want me to stop, all ya gotta say is Appleseed.” How would he know that unless Joel told him? 

You turn away from Tommy and he doesn't waste any time before spooning you. His strong arm rests over you and his hand cups a breast. He kisses your neck, soft and wet. The thick, warm rod in his boxers grazes your lower back as he tongues your delicate skin. He kisses your neck with increasing passion, and he kneads your breast.  Then his arousal fully presses against you through his boxers and your nightgown.  

He curves his body around you and pulls you back into him. He sighs and his engorged cock twitches against your crack, giving you a surge of desire. He slides his hand into your nightgown from the top to palm your naked breast and sighs as he grinds against you.  

“God damn, sweetheart,” he whispers as your nipple hardens against his palm. He takes his hand out of your nightgown and cups your breast on top of it again, then his hand slowly slides down your sleepwear, feeling every inch of your torso before arriving at your bare thigh. He nudges his fingers under the hem of your nightgown and slides his hand up your thigh. When his hand reaches your pussy, your top leg lifts ever so slightly, spreading your thighs to make room for him. You're not wearing underwear. 

“Good girl,” he whispers.  You’re aching to have him inside you. “Drippin’ for me ain't ya, baby?” 

He circles your clit, and you moan softly. There's a wet spot on his boxers pressing into you.  “Fuck” he mutters and backs up his hips. “Damnit, I’m drippin’, too,” he chuckles. “Takin’ these off.” 

After taking his boxers off, Tommy hovers over you and you’re still on your side. Tommy's hand comes back to your breast, and you turn your face toward his.  Your lips meet, and after two seconds, you don’t pull away. His lips push yours open and you accept his tongue. You breathe through your nose as he licks into your mouth.  

Tommy pulls back and reads your face, then gives you another soft kiss before settling in behind you, against you, curled around you again. His naked cock is smooth and warm against your ass. He grinds against you for a minute as he massages your breast and moans into your hair.  Then his hand drifts down between your legs and he groans at how wet you are. 

“I gotta be in ya, sugar.” Tommy backs up and wedges his rigid cock between your thighs, and it glides smoothly through your mess of arousal. His tip reaches your clit. You’re throbbing needily. Your hips tilt on their own, offering him your hole. 

“Fuck,” Tommy says as his tip finds your entrance. “Fuck. That’s right, baby.” he pushes his tip into you. You're dying for it, but you're still a little tense and it's making you even tighter. 

“God damn, you feel good. Can't imagine when he first–.” He pushes into you, trying to let your body relax and accommodate his girth. “Oh shit, mmm–that musta been–Fuck.” He pushes a little further. “Relax for me, baby.” He withdraws some then thrusts further into you.  “Relax, sugar,” he whispers. “Just breathe.” You take a deep breath and relax. The last of him slides in and he bottoms out.  “Ohh, good girl. There we go.” He palms your breast and you melt into him.  “We’re right here, baby.” 

He’s got you speared on his cock, spread apart by his girth. “God damn. What a good girl.” 

With his cock fully sheathed, his thick fingers rub circles on your nipple.  You moan, twitching around the new cock buried in the hot center of your body. “Mmm,” he growls into your hair, still not moving. You need friction. He breathes deeply. “breathe with me, baby.” You breathe with him and feel yourself relax more. 

“Please,” you whine, beginning to move your hips. 

His voice is husky. “God damn. Look at ya, sugar. Fuckin’ yourself on Uncle Tommy’s cock?”

“Please,” you whimper again. 

“What's your daddy gonna think?” 

Your walls twitch and your heart skips a beat. “You said–”

“Yeah. . .He'll be fine, sweetheart..” Tommy begins to move his hips. “He’d be proud’a ya, takin’ this cock like such a good girl.”

He begins to fuck you at a steady rhythm, breathing heavily and cursing softly. You begin to relax with his hand mapping the front of your body, and his stiff cock thrusting into you. He palms your tit again and your head tilts back against him. He kisses your neck, and your body opens for him even more. Your cunt swallows him up with every thrust. 

“Ohh, Joel's a lucky man,” he pants with his dick easily sliding into you, making you whole. “Shit, I'm lucky, too–uggh.”  You push back on him as he fills you with his stiff cock. 

He asks, “Little harder?” 

“Mm,” you nod. 

He slams into you and you moan. 

“Yeah, that's our girl.” 

Soon, you’re lost in the pleasure of Tommy’s thick cock pounding you. 

The front door unlocks and you freeze. You’re both facing away from the bedroom door.  “‘S’okay,” Tommy reminds you. He slows his hips, then bottoms out and pauses. “C’mere,” he wraps his arms around you and with his cock still inside, he rolls over on his back, then sets you down on your other side, arms still wrapped around you, his cock only sliding out half way in the process.

As soon as you’re settled, he bottoms out again with a soft moan.   You and Tommy are both facing the bedroom door now. The covers are down around your waist. The handle moves, then the door opens. The silhouette is Joel with his sleeves rolled up. 

—---

As Joel approaches the bed, the moonlight hits him and his face is dark. 

“She’s so good, Joel,” Tommy pants, with you still full of his cock.

Joel comes to the bed and crouches down. “God damn.” Joel gently takes your jaw in his hand and tilts his head. He studies your face, then his eyes land on yours affectionately. “Couldn't go one day, could ya?” He smiles with his eyes and relief washes over you.  

“M’sorry daddy,” you sigh. “Are you mad?”

“No, baby.” Tommy is fucking you slowly. “I ain't mad.” Joel slowly stands up and palms himself over his jeans as he watches your body move to the slow rhythm of Tommy’s thrusts. 

“Really?”

“Baby, I keep ya stuffed so full’a cock. .  . can't blame ya for needin’ it.”

“Yeah,” you whimper. 

“That's what Uncle Tommy's here for,” Tommy whispers. 

“Now I get to see ya,” Joel says “All of ya,” Joel gently pulls the covers all the way off. Then Joel tugs up at the hem of your nightgown and kneels down to take it off you. 

You try to move forward, reaching for Joel, but Joel puts his hand on your bare chest and Tommy pulls you back, bottoming out again with a moan. 

“Want yours,” you whimper.

“Shhh. You're gonna get it.” 

You watch Joel take off all his clothes, and as he does it, he watches you moving at a slow rhythm.  When Joel’s naked, he spits in his hand. He stands by the bed watching you get fucked by his brother, taking in the view as he squeezes his cock. 

“Daddy, please,” you whine. 

Joel sits down on the bed.  Tommy scooches back to make more room and brings you back with him, still impaled on his cock. Joel lies down and faces you. He gets right up against you, and the first thing he does is kiss you. His hard cock lays against your clit and mound, throbbing for you.  You moan into his mouth as Tommy’s cock drags slowly inside you from behind.  

Joel’s arm wedges between your back and Tommy’s chest, grabbing hold of you.  Joel nudges you upward. Tommy takes the hint and pulls out. You wrap your leg over Joel’s hip. His eyes scan your face, marveling at your feral want. Joel’s hand, still on your back, slides down your ass and hooks under it, between your legs, feeling your sopping wet cunt from the back. “God damn, baby. This all you or did Uncle Tommy cum already?”

“Not yet,” Tommy answers. 

Joel’s tip slides through your folds, then he pulls back  and notches himself at your entrance. He moves his hand to your hip, and pushes into you with a sigh. You're so wet and aroused, he sinks all the way into you.  “Fuck,” Joel breathes. “oh, yeah—ugghh–swallowed me right up, baby.” He marvels at how relaxed you are. With Joel’s arm out of the way, Tommy’s tummy returns flush against your back, with his hard, wet cock pressing against your ass cheek. He grabs your tit. 

Joel buries his cock in you. “Oh baby, you love this, don’t ya?” 

You nod. “Love your cock, daddy.” 

“You’re takin’ it so good, baby.  Think you’re wet enough for—ohh, darlin’.” He grinds against you, deep inside you. “You wanna ride this cock, baby?” 

You nod.  Joel slides out of you and you whimper at the loss as he rolls onto his back. Joel lies face up and holds his cock for you. He whispers, “C’mere baby,” but you're already on your way. 

You straddle him and sink right down on him with a whimpered, “daddy,” then bend forward, putting your tits against Joel’s chest. Tommy’s slowly stroking himself and watching. 

“C’mere,” Joel whispers and reaches for your head. He pulls your face into his for a passionate kiss as you grind into him with his cock buried in you. It only takes a few seconds of grinding into Joel for your walls to spasm. 

“Oh god,” he mutters as you contract around him.  “oh—oh, God, baby.” 

As you finish coming on Joel's cock, your whole body relaxes. You’re even wetter and more open than you were before. “Now you’re–oh yeah, you’re good,” Joel whispers to himself with his hands on the backs of your thighs. You both breathe for a moment and you begin to slowly move again.

Joel licks his finger then reaches over your ass, his hand approaching your hole from behind. You stop moving as he gently wedges the thick digit into your cunt from the top so his fingernail is against his cock. “Yeah,” he whispers, moving the finger around, checking how much you'll stretch. “Yeah,” he says as his head turns and he glances at Tommy. 

Joel cups your cheek  and reads your face. “Can I fuck ya with two cocks, baby?” 

You spasm with an aftershock.  “It won't fit,” you protest, but the thought of it turns you on. Your hips begin to move again. You're taking his cock and his finger. 

“Can we find out, baby doll?” Joel asks.

You slowly move on his cock and finger, with your face close to his. Your clit is throbbing.  “You aren't worried to stretch me?”

“You'll snap right back, baby,” Joel pants as he wedges another finger in with his cock. 

“I dunno if I can,” you whine.  

“It’s okay, darlin’. Let's find out.”

“Okay,” you whisper. 

Tommy gets up on his knees and gets close to Joel's shoulder, near your head.  

“Get it nice and wet,” Joel tells you.  

Without getting off Joel's cock, you turn your head enough to accept Tommy's cock into your mouth. You let saliva pool under your tongue, then swirl it all over his shaft until he's dripping. “alright” Tommy whispers, then you deposit the rest of the saliva from under your tongue. “Alright, don't make me cum, sweetheart.” 

Tommy straddles Joel’s legs behind you while Joel hugs you close. 

Tommy nudges your occupied hole. Joel slowly removes his fingers and Tommy’s tip finds its place between the first cock and the back wall of your cunt. Once Tommy's tip is nestled there, Joel’s fingers leave you and both his hands hold your sides. 

“Deep breath,” Tommy whispers. You draw in a chest full of air, and when you begin to exhale, he begins to push in. 

It burns for a moment as Tommy’s cockhead breaches your dripping hole, but his smooth, wet cock feels better than the fingers. “Fuck,” Tommy mutters as he pushes further. 

“Daddy,” you whimper. “It's a lot.”

“I know it is, darlin’, you're doin’ so good.”

“Breathe with me, sweetheart,” Tommy whispers. You take deep breaths and try to relax. The burn fades as your body catches up.  The stretch is only a little uncomfortable around their shafts at the very edge of you. Deeper inside, you feel a fullness you couldn't have imagined.  

“Good,” Joel says. “doin’ real good, baby. You wanna keep goin’?” 

You nod. You take deep breaths and bow your head as Tommy sinks in a little more. 

“God damn, baby. Packed full of it, ain’t ya?”Joel marvels. The look on his face makes you twitch. 

You lock eyes with Joel, bite your lip, and nod. Joel tilts his hips down toward the bed and you groan into Joel’s chest as Tommy pushes into you as much as he can. The burn is fading, and the sense of fullness overwhelms you in the best way. It's not just physical. You close your eyes and savor it. Joel’s hips begin to move. He slides against your front wall, nudging just the right place, making you whimper. 

Tommy slides in rhythm, and his breathing is labored. “Ohhh,” he moans. “Shit-–ugggh.” He warns Joel, “I'm pretty close, brother.”

Joel looks like he's making a calculation behind his eyes. Then he reads your face. “You want double the cum, baby?” 

You nod. 

“That's my girl,” Joel whispers. “That’s my perfect lil girl.” His hips wiggle under you.

“Ohh-fff-uuggh” Tommy pants and pulls back. 

Joel moves his hips and slides within your stuffed hole. Tommy stays still while Joel thrusts a few small strokes and you groan. Tommy pushes forward and you sigh. Joel kisses you. You push back and Tommy slides forward. Joel does another slow thrust upward, then Tommy says “fuck,” pushes another inch, then begins to cum. “Oh god,” Tommy groans. His dick pulses and pulses in your packed cunt as his warm release coats your walls and Joel's cock. 

“Jesus,” Tommy sighs, then begins to pull out of you. The burn returns as the crown of his tip crests your entrance on its way out. Then you whimper in relief. There's a sense of loss as your body slowly draws itself back in, but it's a major comfort still being wrapped around Joel's cock. Tommy lies down on his back to recover. 

“You did so good baby,” Joel brushes your cheek and his hips lift as your body adjusts itself back to his girth. “Ya like havin’ two cocks?” It’s the first time you haven’t felt packed full from Joel’s cock alone, and your temples feel weak. 

You nod hesitantly. “Do I still feel good?”

“Oh darlin’, you feel so good,” he breathes and the tension melts away from your face. 

“Yeah, I liked it,” you whisper. “But I only need one.” 

He cradles your head and  it feels like it's just the two of you. “Love you so much,” he whispers, and brings your face to his again, rolling his hips under you. He kisses you deeply and grinds up into you with his cock all the way inside. Your mouth breaks away with a moan, and your hips begin to move, bringing an obscene squelching sound with them. 

“Oh darlin’,” Joel whispers, and he pulls you back into a kiss.  He grunts into your mouth with a sharp thrust upward, and the tension boils over.  You begin to clench around him. Joel breaks the kiss with a shudder, then he moans your name as you flutter around his cock. His fingers dig into your hips and he pulls you flush, then pulses with a groan. “Ohhhh, fuck—ohhh,” he sighs as he releases a massive load, more than doubling the cum inside you. The rhythm of Joel’s cock soothes you as his load combines with Tommy's. 

—--

You stay on Joel’s cock for a few minutes, and he strokes your back, praising you quietly.  Tommy falls asleep.  Eventually you sigh and whine, "I have to go to the bathroom.” 

“Ok, baby,” Joel whispers and begins to help you off his cock. 

When you come back, Joel helps you into bed between them. You face Joel and he kisses you good night. You feel thankful for him as you drift off to sleep. 

—-

sequel here

-

-

Thank you for reading 🖤 I know people want updates on certain Joels but I haven't been having the easiest time and sometimes writing something new is lower-pressure.

Uncle Tommy is a brain worm I've had for a couple months ever since I blurted it out in another series.

I have another recent Joel x reader ft. Tommy with a different set miller bros: leopard print

And a darker Tommy x reader here: birds of prey

-----

FIC RECS

If you like brotherly sharing, a couple of my personal favorites are

I can be your pretty girl part 4, and part 5 by (RIP) walkintotheriveranddisappear who sadly inactivated

Liquid Gold and its prequel Two Hands to Hold by @gasolinerainbowpuddles,

If you like the idea of daddy/uncle, @bonezone44 has Joel, tommy, and Ezra.

More brotherly sharing - Smack My Bitch Up, a raider AU by @milla-frenchy.

If you wanna suck Tommy's big balls, @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin has you covered.

More fic recs (and more to come) on my rec blog @toxicrecs.

Alright I tried to bring my tag list back and something went wrong so I might have to remove them from the post sorry 🥲

[aurorawritestoescape]

PLEASE, SIR

best friend’s dad Joel Miller x f!reader || 3,9k

Pt 2 of American Beauty || can be read alone

Summary: you got a taste of Mr Miller and now you crave more.

Tw: 18+ mdni, smut, age gap (reader's in her early 20s, Joel's in his late 40s), rough!Joel, darkish!reader, f!oral, anal play, unprotected piv (wrap it up), degradation, praise kink, light spanking, swearing. Reader has hair. Pics are for the mood, reader has no specific physical descriptions.

A/n: ppl wanted them to fuck so here’s them fucking😏 Hope you all will enjoy!💖 Joel’s ‘Attagirl’ to @milla-frenchy for beta-ing😘

American Beauty || MASTERLIST

*****

You knew you wanted to fuck your best friend’s dad as soon as you met him. Was it wrong? Absolutely. But the way Mr Miller smiled at you and blushed when you shook his hand made your heart beat faster and your pussy tingle. He was single and hot, with a handsome face and a muscular body that you wanted all over yourself. He was also a great dad to Sarah and you couldn’t help but admire him. You loved her and could guess that she wouldn’t like you fooling around with her dad but it wouldn’t hurt her if she didn’t know, right?

You really tried to be a good friend at first. You told your pussy to stand down, tried not to imagine Mr Miller's body grinding against yours, when he came home all sweaty after work, taut muscles bulging under the soaked shirt.

You touched yourself just once, indulging in a fantasy about him while taking a shower. How he'd barge into the bathroom by mistake, blushing with embarrassment. "Oh, Mr Miller," you whimpered under the hot spray of water, thinking of the way he'd give up and fuck you, your cheek pressed to the cold tiles while his cock was plunging deep into your clenching pussy.

You came hard and hoped that you'd fucked that crush out of your system. But it was far from reality.

The night when you heard Mr Miller moan your name, the soft whimper clearly accompanied by the squelching sound of his cock fucking his fist, you told yourself you had to have him.

You practically burst with excitement when he let you suck his throbbing cock. Of course, you kept your cool but your arousal was so overwhelming, that you could come just from blowing his gorgeous fat length. You put all of your expertise into that blowjob, all your affection for the man. And it seemed to pay off. You read the adoration on his face after that and your heart sang. You couldn’t wait for the next night. Your pussy needed to be filled.

***

Sarah is sleeping and you quietly pad downstairs. You haven’t seen Joel all day. He didn't have dinner with you two but he often worked late so you weren’t worried.

You’re definitely worried now, seeing the living room empty, the tv switched off, Joel nowhere to be seen. You’re fumbling with the hem of your oversized t-shirt, nervously chewing on your lip. Where the fuck is he?

Hoping that he’s home, you go back upstairs and walk to Joel's bedroom. You knock quietly, not wanting to wake up Sarah, but no one opens the door. So you knock again. And again. Louder.

At the back of your mind you’re making up excuses to tell Sarah if she finds you at her dad’s bedroom late at night. But it seems to be your lucky day, because she doesn’t wake up and the door finally opens.

Joel’s standing in the doorway, dark eyes boring into you under the furrowed brows.

“What?” He barks in a hushed voice and you realize that it’s not going to be easy.

“I thought we had a date,” you whisper, seductively biting your lip.

“You thought wrong. Go to bed,” he snaps and starts closing the door, when you quickly slide your bare foot in the opening to keep it from shutting. The door hits your heel and it hurts just a little, but you hiss and whine, lifting your leg and rubbing your foot with a pained expression.

“Fuck!” Joel curses and opens the door wider to usher you inside.

He mumbles apologies, leading you to his bed, while you’re limping as if you have at least three toes broken. You feel no pain whatsoever but you couldn’t miss the perfect opportunity.

“It hurts,” you mewl, sitting on his bed, while he’s kneeling in front of you, carefully rubbing your foot and palpating it in search of an injury.

“I’m sorry, sweetheart. I shoulda been more careful.”

His puppy eyes looking up at you make your heart and pussy flutter and you feel yourself gush into your lacy panties, as his big warm hands are massaging your foot. His bedroom is dimly lit by the lamp on the nightstand and he looks absolutely gorgeous.

“It’s ok. Mr Miller. I should have left you alone. I just thought you wanted to spend time with me.”

You drop your eyes with a deep sigh, fumbling with the hem of your tee which isn’t covering much of your naked thighs.

Joel is quiet for a few moments but then he gets up and sits next to you. He doesn’t touch you but the heat of his big body envelops you, making you crave his embrace.

“Sweetheart... it’s fucked up what I did yesterday. I made a mistake. You’re Sarah’s friend for fuck’s sake. I can’t do it tonight… we shouldn’t do it.”

You turn your head to look at him but he averts his eyes, staring in front of himself with an almost pained expression. Your gaze slides down to his big hands clasped between his thick thighs clad in gray sweatpants. His dark tee struggles to contain his broad shoulders and strong arms. Your whole body trembles, just being near the man, and you get up and stand in front of him.

“You’re right, sir. We shouldn’t do anything tonight.”

Your fingers play with the hem of your shirt, brushing your thighs and he lifts his eyes to your face and then lowers them to your naked legs.

“I shouldn’t be here,” you shake your head, inching closer and then planting your knees on both sides of him before you carefully get on his lap.

“Sweetheart,” he growls like an angry wolf, clenching his jaw and staring at your face with a fiery expression. But his hands are gripping your hips, holding you securely, not letting you fall. Not letting you go.

You place your hands on his shoulders and look deep into his dark eyes.

“You shouldn’t pull my panties to the side right now and feel how wet I am. My pussy shouldn’t want your fat cock, Mr Miller,” you whimper quietly, clinging closer to his torso, pressing your chest to his, so he could feel your perked up nipples, sense your heart beating fast.

Your lips graze the shell of his ear and he shivers as his fingers are digging almost painfully into your soft hips.

“You shouldn’t take it out, Mr Miller, and you definitely shouldn’t put it inside me,” you purr into his ear, grinding your aching pussy against his crotch. You feel him big and stiff and a wanton moan escapes your lips.

Suddenly he grabs you and throws you on the bed. Everything spins in your vision, until his face is hovering over yours and he’s pinning you to the bed with his massive body. He’s so broad and heavy, you get scared for a second, that adds to the thrill and your arousal spikes, making you press your thighs together in search of some pressure.

His arms are planted by your sides, lips brush against yours and you crave his kiss, but he only whispers,

“Ya think I don’t know what you’re doin’ , little slut? Want this cock so much, huh?” He grumbles and roughly thrusts his hips into you. The movement moves you up on the bed as his clock pokes into your mound.

“I do, sir,” you whine, batting your lashes at the man but he pulls away from you, gets up and stands next to the bed, one knee planted on it.

“I told ya I wouldn’t fuck you. Wanna suck on my dick, fine, be my guest,” he says, palming his package.

Your eyes are big and glossy as you hear him. Not that you don’t want to choke on his cock again but you came to get your pussy stuffed and you’re nothing but persistent.

“Mr Miller… sir, please,” You sniff and glide your hand down to your pussy. Your shirt has already ridden up, so you press your hand to your covered mound and push your middle finger between your folds. You know he sees the glistening spot on your panties.

Joel growls, adjusting his huge bulge, watching you caress your pussy through the soaked fabric. You bend your knees and open your legs to him while your hand pulls your panties to the side. You feel the cold air on your folds and moan.

“Fuck, baby,” he groans, tugging the band of his sweats down and freeing his cock. It jumps out, hard and flushed and your pussy aches.

“Can you… ahh.. can you put it in, just a little, please? My pussy hurts, sir.”

Your fingers slide between your folds and you’re rubbing your hardened clit, while the other hand pulls your shirt up to your neck, exposing your breasts to him.

“Just a little?” Joel asks, raising his brows and leaning over you again.

His hand finds your throat and he wraps his warm palm around it, using just its weight to dominate you. Your core burns bright with desire.

“Are ya trying to ‘just the tip’ me, girl?” He chuckles, gently squeezing your throat, “I was already using this trick when you were in ya dad’s balls.”

He laughs at you but his eyes return to the place where you’re rubbing yourself with slow strokes.

“I’m sorry, Mr Miller. I know it’s wrong but I want you so much,” You whine, opening your legs wider.

His hand trails down from your throat to your chest and he slightly brushes your nipple, then reaches your belly. He glides his rough palm over the soft skin there, making your stomach heave.

“Ain’t ya a sweet bunny tonight? Where’s that sharp tongue of yours gone?”

You give him a smile and breathe out, “I wanna please you, sir, wanna be your good girl. Just like in your fantasy.”

Joel’s eyes glaze over for a second, as he must be remembering the things he saw in his mind the night before.

“Please, Mr Miller. No one will know,” you beg, pushing your naked breasts together with your hands and squirming on the bed, under the heat of his body, the fire of his gaze and he whispers, not tearing his eyes off your glistening cunt.

“I will know, baby. And I already hate myself for how much I wanna ruin your tight pussy.”

“Yes, yes, do it,” you whine, sounding absolutely desperate. You don’t mind. You know it will get you there. ‘There’ being stuffed full of Mr Miller’s cock.

Your stomach churns with excitement when you see him plant both of his knees on the bed and get between your legs. His big hands grab your thighs and his cock bobs over your crying pussy still partially covered by your panties.

“Let’s take these off,” Joel mumbles, a shade of bitterness in his voice, as his fingers slide under the waistband of your panties, but instead of sliding them off, he rips the fabric at the seams with a carnal growl.

“Oh, fuck,” you squeak and he smirks,

“Your little hole is next, baby.”

Your widened eyes seem to amuse him, as he chuckles but then glides his thumb over your folds, sending sparks of desire through your body.

“I’m joking, sweetheart. I’ll be careful,” he says, and swirls your clit with a pad of his thumb.

“Oh, yeah,” you whimper, feeling your pussy clench around nothing.

Joel nestles the fat head of his cock at your soaked entrance and the heat of it warms up your cold pussy. You bite your lip, taking in his big body between your thighs, muscular arms, tousled hair. His hands are veiny and strong, one is holding your thigh, the other starts pushing his cock into you.

You feel his tip slide inside your hole, stretching it with a dull ache and you moan into your palm, as your eyes roll back in pleasure.

He’s perfect and his cock is finally inside you. At least just his tip.

“So tight. Maybe you’re a slut only for me? How many dicks enjoyed your sweet cunt, sweetheart?”

“I don’t kiss and tell,” you whisper, breathing heavily, drowning in the sensations his cock is giving you.

“Ya know I’ll ruin all the boys for ya, right?” he asks, rolling his hips just a little, still giving you only the tip.

You whimper and it’s the best response you manage to give, already drunk on him. You notice that he’s struggling, his forehead sweaty, teeth chewing on his plush lower lip as he’s trying to control himself and not slam the whole length into your pussy. He just needs a little push.

“Sir, may I have more, please?” You ask softly as your hand inches to his cock and you brush his stiffness with the pads of your fingers.

Joel watches your digits slide over the soft skin of his shaft while your tight cunt is swallowing his tip and he curses.

“Shit. A tip is never enough, baby, I know. Especially for such a greedy pussy like yours. She’s sucking me in so hard.”

You nod eagerly, brows pulled together, big doe eyes pleading.

“Who asked for just the tip? Now ya gotta come just from my head spreading your tight hole, ‘k?”

He’s clearly enjoying torturing you, a smirk tugging at his lips, and you clench your jaw with anger. Your good girl act is getting hard to keep up when your body and heart are demanding to be fucked properly.

You take a deep breath and beg one last time, “please, give me all of it. Wanna be full of your big cock, sir.”

Joel groans and suddenly his member leaves your pussy entirely.

“On your stomach, now,” he orders with steel in his voice, and you quickly turn over, lying down on your front and pushing your naked ass up for him.

“Don't want you to look at me when I’m fucking your cunt. Got it?”

His hands quickly grab your hips and lift your ass higher, making you stand on your knees, while your cheek is resting on his pillow.

You’re speechless, anticipating what he’s going to do to you, and he slightly slaps your asscheek,

“I asked you a question, girl.”

“Yes, yes, I won’t look at you. Just fuck me. Ruin me, sir.”

“Good little slut,” he praises you, cupping your pussy and then softly slaps your wet folds with his big palm, making you whimper into the pillow that smells so much like him.

“Your kitty is purring for me, so sloppy and warm,”

Two of his fingers dip between your folds and he glides the pads from your entrance to your clit.

“Good kitty.”

You almost come just from his words and then jerk, when you feel his wet mouth on your desperate cunt.

His tongue dives between your folds and he slurps up the slick of your arousal, humming against your sensitive center. You clench the sheets with your fingers as your core burns with an upcoming climax.

“Fuck, yeah,” you moan and he rubs the back of your thighs with his big hands.

“Delicious little cunt,” he mumbles, as his tongue dances around your fluttering hole and his nose presses against your tight ring. He pushes his tongue inside you and begins fucking you with it. You push your face into the pillow, trying to muffle the moans, coming out of your mouth.

He expertly brings you closer to your release and when your legs start trembling, you come crying out into the bed. You’re trying your best not to plop on your stomach but thankfully he’s holding you steady with his hands on your hips, drinking your juices and moaning. His moans are so hot, their sound alone prolongs your orgasm and your body jerks, being hit with one wave of ecstasy after another.

When your climax dissipates, you slightly move away from him, and his hands let go of your body. You fall on your stomach, spent, sweaty and hot from Joel’s caress.

In a second you feel his body on yours and he presses you into the mattress with his weight.

“Still want my cock, baby?”

You feel his bare chest at your back, the heat of his skin reaching you even through your shirt.

“Yes, Mr Miller,” You softly mumble, reveling in the afterglow. Fortunately he gives you a few moments of respite, pinning you down with his body, his lips brushing the nape of your neck, thick fingers running over your arms. He’s so gentle with you, it makes your heart flutter.

Soon he lifts his weight off of you and sits between your legs. He grabs the back of your thighs and pushes them apart, spreading them wide and exposing both of your holes to his gaze.

Suddenly his thumb presses to your asshole and your muscles get taut, as you mewl, “Mr Miller, can we try it some other day?”

“What is it? My slut is scared of a little anal action?”

“A little? Your cock is huge, you’ll rip me in half,” you grumble and he chuckles.

“We should start somewhere, right?” He asks, massaging your tight ring with a pad of his thumb.

You moan a sultry ‘yeah’ and he spits on your asshole and pushes his thumb deeper.

“Shhh… relax for me, baby.” His voice is so gentle you immediately do as he says, and his thumb sinks in further.

“Yeah, just like that. Attagirl.”

Still keeping his thumb in your ass, Joel glides his hard member between your folds and positions his wet tip at your sopping pussy. He slowly starts pushing his cock in, inch by inch, while your walls are trying to accommodate his thick length and you slightly tilt your hips to make the angle more comfortable.

“Oh, baby,” Joel moans, as his member is slowly filling you. His fingers are digging into your hips and your core pulsates, welcoming every inch of him.

Soon his balls slap your pussy as he bottoms out and his tip pushes at your cervix. You take a deep breath and relax more around him, trying to memorize the feeling of him inside your pussy and ass.

“You’re so big, daddy”, you blurt out and he pulls his thumb out of your tight ring and slaps your asscheek with a grumble, “told ya yesterday, ‘no daddies.’” Your asshole clenches, already missing his thumb.

“I felt your dick twitch inside me just now. Admit it, you like it when I call you that, daddy,” you smirk, planting your palms on the bed and getting on your hands.

“Here’s my little brat,” he says, gliding his palms over your back and ass, lifting your shirt, as your body erupts in chills. You take it off completely and he bends over. You feel his chest pressed to your back, and your whole body vibrates at the sensation of his skin against yours.

“It feels so good,” you whimper, gripping his cock with your walls but his gentleness is gone as he clenches a fist of your hair and slightly tilts your head to growl in your ear,

“I’m gonna ruin your little needy hole right now and ya gonna be a good girl and call me ‘Sir’ and only ‘sir’. Is it clear?”

Your chest is heaving, your pussy is fluttering around his cock, your core burns with lust. You’d do anything for him right at that moment.

“Yes,” you breath out and he slightly shakes your head still gripping your hair, “Yes, what?”

“Yes, sir,”

“That’s my girl.”

As soon as he says it, his chest leaves your back as he straightens up and grabs your hips.

He starts railing you with hard and fast strokes, without mercy hitting your ass with his thrusts.

You’re biting your lips trying not to moan loudly, not wanting to wake up Sarah, while her dad is fucking your ‘little needy hole’.

Joel tries to be quiet too but an occasional groan still leaves his lips, making you know he’s enjoying your wet tight pussy.

“Fuckin’ hell. Oh, yeah… shit,” he mumbles, rolling his hips slower, letting you feel every ridge of his cock. His palms caress your back before one hand slides down to your pussy. He bends over a little and his fingers find your clit.

“C’mon, you owe me one more, baby,” he murmurs, swirling your twitching bud, slick with your juices.

You moan and then gasp when he grabs you by your arm and pulls you flush to his chest. His hand is rubbing your clit, while the other wraps around your throat to hold you close to him.

His body is engulfing you, his scent is everywhere, his cock sliding in and out of your cunt, it’s too much and it’s not enough.

So you turn your head to him to look into his face. You stare at each for a few seconds. His eyes, blown and full of lust, mirror yours and you silently plead for his lips, when your gaze slides down to them.

“I told you not to look at me,” he chastises you but there’s no bite in his words. His hips are still moving slowly as he’s feeding his cock to your pussy, thick fingers still playing with your clit.

“Please, sir,” you whisper almost silently and he leans closer and gives you a kiss, languid and deep, passionate and sweet at the same time.

The taste of him adds to the blissful sensations and you come on his cock, moaning into his mouth, as he’s drinking your soft sounds. Your pussy clenching his cock sends him over the edge and he starts spilling his cum inside you, bucking his hips with every squirt of his load.

You feel the warmth pool inside of you as he plunges his length in over and over until his cum drips out your stretched hole.

Soon Joel sits on his heels and pulls you down on his lap. You both rest for a few moments, your back against his chest, his softening cock still snuggly inside you.

He nuzzles the crease of your neck, as his hands glide over your belly, breasts and arms.

“You need to go to bed, baby”, he whispers and you turn your head, noticing the first rays of the sunset, coloring the sky with a peachy light.

You get off him and he takes you to the bathroom. He helps you clean up and leaves you so you could pee.

When you return, he hands you your shirt and the ripped panties.

“I’ll get you a new pair. Something less slutty.”

You smile and step closer to him, not quite knowing how to behave around Mr Miller now.

“Can I come here tomorrow?” You ask, raising your big eyes at him, and add, “sir.”

He’s looking at you, brows furrowed in thought, as he’s tracing your features with his warm eyes.

The moment lasts forever but he finally responds, hugging you close and mumbling into your ear,

“Fuck it. If ya want, I’m gonna fuck your sweet pussy every night you’re here.”

You gush again and happily whisper ‘I do’, nuzzling his scruffy cheek.

*****

Thank you for reading!🌺

Please consider commenting and reblogging if you enjoyed the fic!💖

American Beauty || Masterlist

Tag list:@milla-frenchy @harriedandharassed @survivingandenduring @missannwinchester @iamasaddie @nervousmumbling @bbyanarchist @stevie75 @puduvallee @auteurdelabre @mountainsandmayhem @senoratess @flamingochick55 @theoraekenslover @schnarfer @littlemisspascal @mermaidgirl30 @staywildflowahchild @yesjazzywazzylove-blog

Also tagging @604to647 @fruityreads @noceurous @joelmillerisapunk @janaispunk @morallyinept ♥️

If you'd like to be tagged in my future fics, let me know!💕

[romanarose]

The Last of Us Masterlist

Darkness on the Edge of Town (series): Joel saves you from FEDRA guards, and as a result just spend the QZ’s lockdown with you in his apartment

Lover of the Light: Joel see's you as nothing but sunshine, something he doesn't want to darken. You see Joel as a good man who needs to relax a bit. Ft. Matchmaker Tommy Miller

To The Rescue: Sarah gets her first period unexpectedly, and Joel is unprepared. Luckily, you are there to help.

Kiss it Better: You catch Joel in the mirror looking at his scar.

Flannel: Joel accidentally gives away a precious piece of clothing.

No.: You're sick and Joel won't let you go to work.

Burn: Ellie burns her bite mark. Without telling Joel.

Lights: Jewish!reader doesn’t have a menorah after the world ended. Joel wants to show he cares about her religion.

Just a Fantasy: Joel wants to try something knew he thinks you might be into.

Yes, Mr. Miller?: DBF!Joel fucks you at thanksgiving

Part 2: Yes, Uncle Tommy?: Tommy has his turn with you while Joel uses your mouth.

Part 3: Happy New Year, Mr. Miller: Joel fucks your mouth while on a phone call with your dad.

Part 4: Happy Valentines Day, Mr. Miller: Joel invites you over ON Valentines day... not FOR Valentines day.

Part 5: Please Stay, Mr Miller?: The sexiest holiday ever. Furniture sales.

Part 6: Happy St. Patrick’s Day, Darl’n: Joel takes you out for day drinking. Part 7: I miss you, Mr. Miller: You think back on Easter, when Joel makes you WET Part : Please, Mr Miller?: You remember the day Joel took your virginity

Santa Joel-y: Joel is feeling down about his weight, but as he's dressed as Santa, you appreciate his body, and he appreciates yours.

Scars: Reader is honest with Joel about the self harm scars on her body

Inner Youth: Joel lets a sheltered reader live out generational experiences she was denied

About a Girl Masterlist: 90's AU.Joel meets you at possibly the worst time. He's working long hours, a kindergarten daughter, a messy alcohalic brother, and still having to placate his ex, Sarah's mom. Pus, you're from different worlds. You love Nirvana, Joel is more an Alan Jackson kind of guy. Still... he can't help but be drawn to you. Even when you're accidentally outted. Joel doesn't really understand what being "trans" means, but he's determined to learn.

Puppet: Boston!Joel is drowning in pain, a pain he can only satiate by controlling his puppet (darkish, mean Joel)

Joel Takes A Strap: Trans man reader. exactly what it says.

My Girl: Very soft comfort Joel

The River: Joel meets Sarah's mom!reader, how they fell in love and lost their virginity to each other

Wreckage: Joel and Tommy return to Joel and Sarah's old house the day after Sarah dies. Song fic to Wreckage by Pearl Jam

The Ghost of You: You move into an old house in Jackson, only to find it's haunted by a man with a tragic past.

[milla-frenchy]

Wolf like me - part 2

3k8 | Joel Miller x fem reader Summary: trying to understand your relationship with Joel, you awkwardly stir up his possessiveness Warnings: 18+ mdni. Darkish. Mentions of somnophilia and anal, manhandling, oral (f/m), cum eating, slapping, spitting, biting, rough sex, dirty talk, degradation, piv, ass play, a little blood. Self abandonment, toxic relationship, possessiveness, jealousy, reader is looking for pain, Joel is not particularly nice and not caring either, angst. No age specified. a/n: @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog thank you for the beautiful edit of Joel with the wolf 😍🔥and for beta-ing me, as usual. ILY 💕🫶

ao3 | masterlist

part 1

His feet were firmly planted on the ground, as his cock was sinking between your folds. His eyes locked with yours, he was pounding you against the front door. 

You heard his heavy footsteps when you knocked, and he grabbed your arm as soon as he opened the door, then closed it back with the palm of his hand. Without waiting for you to put your things down, he pushed you against the door. He groaned, his forehead against yours.

He knelt down and pulled down your pants and panties, growling into your crotch as he took in your scent. His tongue slipped between your folds, eager to collect your wetness, which had begun to soak into the fabric of your underwear as soon as you walked up the stairs.

“Already soaked for me”, he murmured between two breaths. And you dug your fingers into his brown curls, as if you wanted him to devour you even more. Even if he couldn't be any closer. He grabbed one of your calves to lift your leg, placed your thigh  on his shoulder and his tongue impatiently lapped at your pussy. He ran it flat, over and between your folds, then fucked you with it. You were already moaning, quickly becoming sensitive to his way of eating you. It was wild, feral. As if you were there to fill one of his needs. He pushed three fingers into your pussy, and his tongue swirled against your clit.

“Fuck, Joel”, you whimpered, feeling your orgasm building deep inside you. He growled again, as if your words bothered him. But you knew now that they only turned him on more.

As soon as you came, your pussy clenching on his fingers, he replaced them abruptly with his tongue, diving it deep between your folds. He wanted to feel you cum on his tongue. The pleasure had seized you so quickly that you were dizzy. When your spasms stopped, you were so shaky that you could barely stand on your feet. After getting up he didn’t bother to wipe his mouth and his chin, both dripping, and already, his tongue was searching for yours. Mixing your wetness with your saliva and his. His beard rubbed against your skin, and you loved feeling the raw contact. He was wearing only jeans that he quickly pulled down under his cock and his balls, and his thick fingers gripped his shaft, guiding it into your depths.

And now he was pounding you, quickly, his hands tight on your thighs wrapped around his waist. You gripped his shoulders with your hands to hold him against you and feel his warmth, but he grunted, “Wanna look at you while you’re taking my cock.” His piercing gaze was plunged into yours, as if he was probing your soul. His intensity made it barely impossible to hold his glance. His cock pierced you with every thrust of his hips, so violently that you no longer knew whether you felt pleasure or pain. But you didn't care. You just wanted to feel something, and that was what he was giving you. He lowered his pace and tilted his pelvis, now thrusting against your G spot, at a slower but deeper rhythm. You bit your lip and he smirked.

“Can feel your cunt squeezing me.”

You closed your eyes as you felt the wave grow, ready to break through your entire body, while he kept thrusting. You opened your eyes, and his gaze was still on you. “Look at that little cunt, ready to cum on my fat cock…yeah, give it to me.”

You moaned louder, and bit your lip to the point that the taste of iron had now invaded your mouth.

“I know, it’s too much for that tight cunt, right? Fuck…”

Your pussy clenched and you whimpered, overwhelmed by the pleasure.

Emotions and sensations, so strong that you lost yourself in them and in the feelings you had for him now. When he saw them in your eyes, he shook his head and buried his face in your neck, breathing in deeply as his nose rubbed against your delicate skin, before biting it. When you cried out as his teeth dug into your flesh, you felt him freeze. He was close.

He pulled out, grunting “kneel” and you presented your open mouth to him, just in time for the hot spurts of cum to warm it. His fist clenched your hair as he dragged the tip of his twitching cock over your soiled tongue.

You fell asleep in his bed, just feeling him cover you with a blanket. Many times, you had fallen asleep in his apartment, woken up in the middle of the night by the feeling of his thick cock roughly sliding in your pussy and spreading your folds, using you like a rag doll, whose limbs and body were controlled by his movements. And you clung to him fearing that he would let you go, while he couldn't do without your pussy tighting on his shaft, barely managing to hold back from cumming inside you, and shooting his cum onto your stomach or anywhere else at the last moment.

But that morning you woke up not having been fucked during the night, and his side of the bed was cold. You felt empty. You pushed back the blanket to inspect your arms and legs, looking for the slightest trace of bruising. Then your hips, where faint marks remained, from the last time he had held on to them as he thrusted his cock into you. You couldn’t remember if it was in your pussy or your ass. The erased traces of his fingers buried in your flesh only made the void inside you grow.

You saw each other several times after the day he had held you in his arms the last time. But he hadn’t shown you any other signs of affection since.

When you left his apartment, the raindrops on your cheeks were mixing with your tears.

Later that day, you met Robert at the usual meeting point, and you saw Marlene leaving discreetly. He gave you some supplies and asked you to bring them to one of his guys near the guardhouse. 

Once there, you felt a gaze on you and you turned around. Joel’s dark stare was fixed on you, and he didn’t flinch when yours landed on him. Why would he? He had been a hunter, a wild beast, since the beginning. And all you wanted was to be his prey. Even more than usual, as the days and months passed. So you brushed against the arm of the man you were talking to, whose first name you didn’t care about, while in your head you could only hear your mind repeating “Joel.” You smiled a little more than you usually would have when that guy said something kind to you. And when he leaned over to whisper something in your ear, you let him, hoping that Joel was still watching.

You left, heading towards your apartment. You had only taken a few steps when he grabbed you. You knew it was him, the moment he clasped your wrist. He pinned you against the alley wall, your cheek against the brick, and his cock against your ass. Already hard. The sleeves of his blue denim shirt were rolled up and your eyes were fixed on his forearm veins, when he held your wrist firmly against the wall.

“Fuckin’ slut. My cock’s not enough?”

He chuckled when you stuck your ass out towards him.

“Ain’t gonna fuck you here. You’re really ready to take it anywhere.”

He grabbed your arm, leading you with a firm hand to his apartment. You tried to keep up with him, but he walked fast and you were forced to trot alongside him.

“Hurry the fuck up”, he barked at you, when you were going up the stairs. You felt his impatience, and you were almost afraid for the first time of what was going to happen. Maybe you had gone too far, testing him like that. The post-apocalyptic world brought out basic needs. Eating, sleeping, fucking, owning. And Joel seemed to be the embodiment of that.

When he opened the door and pushed you inside, you stumbled, and almost fell. He closed the door behind you and once he turned back to you he put his hands on his hips. You could see he was trying to calm down, his nostrils flaring from his short, angry breathing.

“Joel, I-”

The look he gave you cut short what you wanted to tell him.

“The fuck was that, outside?”

His eyes were darker than ever and when he took a step forward to approach you, you took a step back.

“Joel…you’re scaring me.”

“You're goddamn right to be scared. ‘Cause I wanna tear you into pieces right now. Wanna fuck you until you pass out, and then, maybe you’ll stop thinking with your cunt.”

“I need you”, you murmured on the verge of tears. “I need you, and you’re not here for me. Not as much as I need. I thought you’d be, after…” Your voice broke.

“After what? After I hugged you? You're a fool, if you think I'll love you. I don’t love, I own. I possess.”

He was already close to you when you realized he had moved, his body against yours and his face lowered towards you. His hand was on your throat.

“I already told you that you belong to me. No one else can have you. So, I’m gonna ask you one last time: what was that, outside?”

His hand tightened on your throat when he asked you that question, and you brought your hands to his, to make him release you, but of course, his grip was too strong. When he withdrew his hand, he didn’t even hide the satisfaction he felt, seeing his mental and physical hold on you.

“I wanted to make you jealous”, you whined. “I wanted you to notice me, to feel something for me.” But he didn't even respond to that, to your desperation. You were emotionally bare in front of him, and he was giving you nothing.

“I’m gonna fuck that cute little face of yours. And when your mouth is full of my cock, at least you’ll stop whining”, he said, undoing his belt before letting it fall to the floor, and then unzipping his jeans. When he took out his cock, you were no longer crying. The idea that he was going to fill you made you forget all your doubts, all your insecurities. You knew, the moment his cock was buried in you, no matter which hole he would use, he would only be yours.

When he began fucking your mouth to the point of making you choke on his cock, you didn't back down. You let him dispose of it as he wished. He hit the back of your throat every time he thrusted in, one hand around your neck to feel his shaft sliding in. Feeling how far he was going. When he released you and let you catch your breath, you begged him “I want you to fill my mouth.”

“I bet you do,” he answered, holding the back of your head with one hand, and fucking his wrist with the other. He thrusted one last time, his balls clenched in his hand as if he wanted to shove them into your mouth too. When he came, his neck swollen and his veins bulging, he managed to say “don’t wanna see a single drop flow." You did as he wanted, swallowing the spurts as he offered them to you, keeping his cock between your lips.

He didn’t make you cum, and you didn’t ask. You didn't try to relieve the pressure between your thighs, either. He showered you, like he did sometimes. Like someone would wash an abandoned dog brought to a shelter. His calloused hands running the soap over every inch of your skin, between every fold, every curve, and rubbing every bone.

He knelt down, reaching your lower stomach, and was turning your body the way he wanted. Facing him, back to him, sideways. He cleaned your feet, bringing them up one after the other as you turned your back to him. He ran his hands over your pussy and leaned you forward. Sometimes he fucked your ass in the shower, helped by the soap. Your desire for him was so strong that you didn't need any more time for him to dive his cock into your tight hole. Your mind was so eager, so dependent on him, on his body, on his cock, that you could take him almost immediately.

He never let you wash him. It had disappointed you at first, as you were eager to touch his body, but now you were used to just looking at him, standing in the shower next to him. Hypnotized by his hands, his body and his skin marked with several scars. You watched him clean his cock. Once you tried to touch it, but he slapped your hand and grunted “no.”

Once clean, you got out of the shower and he always dried you off first. If he was cold, he didn't show it and never complained. Every time you felt your pussy drool, but he never fucked you at that moment. Sometimes though, he ran his hand between your folds and licked his fingers. At most he passed his tongue quickly. But rarely.

Then he fed you. He probably knew that your fridge was often empty. “That fuckin’ Robert doesn’t give you enough food cards or what?” he asked one day. You shrugged your shoulders.

And you were still perplexed by all this, the showering, the feeding. That felt mechanical, as if he had a job to do.

You were in line to send messages when you saw him walk past everyone. He came out a few minutes later, his jaw clenched. When he saw you, he told you to meet him at his apartment after you were done. 

He fucked your mouth, as usual. He ate your cunt, too, but didn’t make you cum. He told you to lie down on his bed. You wondered if he was going to jerk off and cum on your body without fucking you. You couldn't discern his thoughts, even less than usual.

He was standing, facing the bed and looked even more magnificent, more magnetic than usual. Even darker, perhaps, if it was even possible. 

He took his cock in his hand, running his thumb over the precum to spread it over his tip. He was so beautiful, his sexual energy was overwhelming you, so  you slipped your hand down to your pussy and started rubbing your clit while looking at him. He rushed to the bed and swatted your hand away, growling “don’t fucking touch what’s mine.”

His excessive possessiveness continued to fill the void in you and you didn't rebel any more than the other times, waiting to see how he was going to dispose of your body. Wanting to let him use it as he wished to.

When he laid down between your legs, he rubbed his cock between your folds, covering it with your wetness. His fist was clenched in your hair as you sought to catch his gaze with yours. When he pushed his cock half way into your pussy, before pulling back and plunging all the way in, you screamed. “Shut up and let me use you”, he grunted. You spread your thighs for him to go deeper, and he added “yeah, you know what you’re good for.”

Your fingers tight on his biceps, you followed his movements by rolling your hips towards him.

“Deeper, Joel,” you begged. 

"Yeah? You wanna scream, baby doll? Want my cock to help you forget everything else?”

You nodded, biting your lip, as he already picked up the pace, his balls slapping against your skin. Your moans turned into cries when his thrusts went harder. “Every time you cry, you’re even more mine than before,” he said, nestling his nose in the warmth of your neck, his hands gripping your hips. He licked your earlobe, then bit it gently.

"This pussy’s mine. Fuck…You're mine. Say it”, he panted, his lips against your ear.

“I am yours. All yours.” He stopped, balls deep in your pussy, to look at you. You didn't see the slap coming. It wasn't a strong one, but sharp enough to understand that he was pissed.

“I said: this pussy’s mine. You’re mine. Repeat it”, he said again, holding your chin and pouding you again against the mattress.

“My pussy’s yours. I’m yours”, you whimpered.

“I’ll tear apart anyone who touches you. You understand that?”

Tears ran down your cheeks, as in that moment he gave you more than you had ever had or felt.

“Yes. And I want that. I want to be marked by you, however you wanna do it, and I want everyone to know it.”

He grabbed your hair and held your head back against the bed. Neck and throat offered to him, he licked and sucked your skin. You knew you would have several visible hickeys the next day.

“Bite me, Joel.”

“Fuck…” he buried himself completely, holding his cock deep in you. Your head was still held back by his massive hand. He sank his teeth into your neck and bit into the tender flesh. You heard him growl against your neck, and soon you felt your tears streaming down toward your ears. But you didn't want him to stop. You wanted him to taste everything your body could offer him. And when he continued to fuck you, he responded to your silent waiting by licking the evidence of your offerings with his tongue, before giving way to his lips, coming to soothe the bite with kisses. Your tears and blood mixed on his tongue. 

“Touch yourself,” he said, looking at you. You slipped your index finger between his lips and the outline of a smirk was drawn on his lips as he sucked your finger. You then placed it against your clit, and began to caress it delicately. Your other fingers brushed against his cock, and the place where you two became one.

“Come for me…come on my cock.” It was almost like a plea, and it was enough for your orgasm to build. 

“Joel…please don’t stop. I…Fuck…I’m gonna cum.”

When you squeezed his cock, he thought he was going to cum between your folds without having time to pull out. He clenched his jaw so hard that you heard his teeth gnash. He pulled away and grabbed you by the arm, leading you to the dining room table where he bent you over. He pulled one of your knees up onto the wood, spreading you lewdly, and thrusted in, pressing your chest against the table with his hand. He fucked you so hard that your disjointed body was shaking, following his rough movements. You were so wet that all you could hear was the sounds of his sodden cock stuffing your pussy.

He was now growling and grunting, rumbling several “fuck”, while he was pounding you quickly. Spreading your ass cheeks with one hand, you heard the spittle of saliva reach your ass. He pressed his thumb against your tight ring, spreading his saliva, and pushed his finger in. The double stimulation was driving you crazy. Crazy about him, crazy about his whole body, crazy about the sensations you were feeling. Your second orgasm hit you, even stronger than the first one. A breathy “shit” escaped his lips just before he pulled out and shot his load against your asshole. He emptied his balls and collapsed on your body, his cock resting against your ass.

“You’re mine and I must protect you. You understand?" he managed to say between two breaths.

“Yes… yes, Joel.”

Before leaving, he told you not to go near the corner of Stillman and Cross for 24 hours. You didn't ask any questions, and nodded.

When you got home, you couldn't stop smiling. You felt close to him. Protected by him. Nothing could happen to you, he wouldn’t allow it.

When you fell asleep in your bed that night, you could still smell his scent on you.The moon was round and full, and lit your face all night while you slept. You dreamed of him. Of his hands, his cock, his gaze. You slept better than ever, that night.

The next day, upon reaching Area 5, one of Robert's men asked you if you knew what had happened. You shook your head, waiting for his explanation. A knot tightened in your stomach even before he answered.

“Robert’s dead. Joel and Tess were seen leaving the place where he was found.”

You walked towards the corner of Stillman and Cross, looking for him on every street. Finally, you saw him, near his apartment. He was walking quickly, behind Tess. And…a kid you didn’t know. His eyebrows were furrowed and he seemed preoccupied. He was carrying a backpack, so was Tess. 

It was raining.

He turned around, as if to see whether they were being followed. And that's when he saw you, across the street. Your eyes met for a few seconds, and he shook his head “no” to you, before entering his building. The knot in your stomach came back, more painful than earlier.

You didn't sleep that night.

When you went back to his apartment, the morning after, he wasn’t there anymore.

You never saw him again, never knew if he was still alive. The hope he would return to Boston had left you a long time ago. Sometimes you thought you were seeing him in the streets of the QZ. But it was never him, and each time you cried when you realized it.

You had wondered for a long time if he knew that he was going to leave that day. You still wondered sometimes. And you hated him for leaving you alone with this void inside you, bigger than ever. With no one to protect you.

You never managed to find out more about his past, during the times you were with him. Never knew why he kept this broken watch on his wrist night and day. He had remained largely a mystery to you.

When the anger had passed, you thought a lot about your moments with him. All those times he showered you, fed you. Only now understanding that it was his way of taking care of you, of showing you his affection. He probably didn't know how else to express it, broken by this world, and whatever happened to him.

You understood that the last thing he told you was meant to protect you.

A few times you went to the Mission hill pier. You watched the black waves that washed up there. They were often agitated.

After his departure the anger that had lived in your soul for so long dissipated. Now you felt empty.

*****************

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[justagalwhowrites]

Proof of Life

You and Joel find solace in each other in the QZ.

Pairing: Darkish!Joel Miller x Female Reader

Warnings: Smut! Rough sex. Reader has skin that visibly reddens and bruises. No use of Y/N. Minors DNI 18+ Only.

Length: 2.6k

Joel liked the way you bruised for him. 

It was a thought that should bother him, he knew. That he liked how your skin darkened where he touched you, the marks violent and lasting. Proof of life. Proof that you were alive enough that you could bleed beneath your skin, proof that he existed enough to do damage to something. It was the only time he really thought he was alive anymore, when he was inside you. When he was hurting you. 

“More,” you panted, nails digging into his thighs so hard he thought you must be drawing blood. But that was fine. He liked that, too. 

He pulled out of you, his cock slick with you, and your body - just taut and strained - went limp, an almost pouty look on your face. He grabbed your chin roughly, callused fingers sinking into the soft flesh of your cheeks and your eyes met his. Daring him. Pushing him. 

“Think I won’t give you what you want?” He was breathless, too, putting his face right by yours. But not to kiss you. You never kissed, not really, never did anything with your mouths that didn’t involve teeth. He took your lower lip in his mouth and pulled, biting down until the coppery taste of your blood fell on his tongue. He swallowed it, the essence of you pulled into him. He liked that, too. “What you need?” 

Your skin was reddening under his grip, spots that he knew would be dark in the morning. Maybe violent purple or black, the beginnings of the bruise pushing him on, making him desperate. 

Or maybe rabid was a better term. He was an animal with you, not really able to occupy the realm of human men now. He was other. Most often, he was hollow, just a ghost moving through the world. You, at least, awakened something inside him. Proved there was something there to wake up at all. 

He released your jaw, moving quickly to flip you onto your front before sharply grabbing your hips - the yellowing bruises from his thumbs the last time he had you somehow making him harder - and slamming into your dripping slit. You gasped and arched into it, Joel bottoming out in you and grinding hard against the back of you. It hurt. He knew it did. He could tell by the way your body shuddered, the instinct to pull back that you had to correct, the brief recoil before you pressed your ass back against him and he held your hips, his fingers over the bruises from before, watching them redden as he fucked you hard, rough, forcing the air from you with every thrust. 

It had always been this way with you, even the first time. 

Joel had met you on the way to Boston, run into you on the road with Tommy about five days walk from the city. He recognized you immediately. 

Not that he knew you. He’d never seen you before in his life. You were from somewhere near D.C. if he had to hazard a guess - you’d never told him in the years you’d been fucking - and were bloody and dirty and holding an axe in your grip like it was a lifeline. 

But he recognized you. The eyes of another dead thing, someone who had lived through the great horror of some utter hell, something that didn’t destroy you, not really, it did something far worse. It made you into something you didn’t know and couldn’t understand, even from within. Who you were before wasn’t destroyed so much as fled, a refugee from the space you now occupied. There was no rubble, no signs left that you’d been there at all. Instead, there was nothing. 

Joel recognized you in that way. Knew that you saw yourself looking back through him, too. 

The three of you made it to the QZ together and you gave Joel and Tommy a stiff nod after you were processed and left without a word. 

He was almost surprised to see you again, months later, getting drunk at the speakeasy. It seemed like you wouldn’t still be here, that maybe you were something that hadn’t really existed at all. 

But when Tommy left Joel alone to go flirt with a pretty girl he spotted from across the bar, you came over, shitty whiskey in hand. 

“Miller,” you said, climbing on the stool next to him. He grunted in response. “You look particularly miserable.” 

“Don’t think anyone here’s exactly happy,” he said, taking a sip of liquor. 

You laughed once, darkly. 

“They are,” you said, nodding to people talking and laughing and swaying to the music from the old jukebox in the corner. 

“Fuckin’ idiots,” Joel muttered. 

“Lucky idiots,” you countered, lighting a cigarette. 

“Those things kill you, you know,” Joel said wryly. 

“Counting on it,” you replied, taking a long drag before holding it out to him. He took it and took a pull himself. You smiled a little. “I’m too much of a chicken shit to use a gun. Hoping something else will get me sooner rather than later. These are my insurance policy.” 

Joel nodded slowly, holding the smoke in his lungs for a moment before exhaling. He gave the cigarette back. 

“Can’t say I blame you,” he said. 

“Figured you’d get it,” you replied. “Birds of a feather, all that.” 

“Least you know you’re a chicken shit,” he said, taking a drink. “I was stupid enough to try it and fail.” 

He wasn’t entirely sure why he told you. He’d never told anyone else. Maybe because he knew you’d understand it. It didn’t feel like a shameful secret with you, it felt more like talking about a tornado he’d seen once, standing and watching the destruction knowing there was nothing he could do to stop it. 

“Seems like that’s less being a chicken shit and more being a shit aim,” you said, a teasing edge to your voice, taking another drag before holding the cigarette out again. He took it. 

“Aim was fine,” he said. “Flinched.” 

“Ah,” you nodded knowingly. “Then welcome to the club of those who wish they were dead but are too afraid to do anything real about it. Membership fee isn’t bad. We have jackets.” 

He laughed a little and gave you the cigarette back again. 

“Doing anything later?” You asked. 

“Nothing worth doing,” he replied. 

“Think I’m worth doing?” 

He looked over at you, at those flat, dead eyes. 

You would be pretty, he thought, if he was capable of really feeling that. About his age, he was pretty sure, with lips he’d have wanted to kiss once upon a time, tits he’d have wanted to hold. 

He hadn’t been laid in a while. He could use a fuck. 

“Think so.” 

You nodded and finished the cigarette, stamping it out on the table top before downing the rest of your drink. You dropped the still smoking butt into your cup. 

“Your place or mine?” 

The two of you went to his apartment and you pulled your shirt over your head as soon as the door to his room was shut, casting it aside. His eyes ranged over you, the scars on your skin, your nipples pebbled and hard. Your gaze held his - closer to alive than he’d ever seen you - and you stepped out of your boots before pulling down your pants and underwear, bearing yourself to him like some kind of offering. He got undressed, too, watching as your fingers twitched, like you were resisting the urge to touch yourself. You got on the bed and let your knees fall open and he crawled between them, a finger tracing delicately over your slit as he leaned in to kiss you. 

But you pulled back, frowning, brows drawn low. 

“What are you doing?” You asked. 

“Thought we were fucking,” he said, confused. 

“Right,” you said. “I want you to fuck me, Joel. Hard. I want you to make it fucking hurt. You think I’m here for some gentle lay? That I’d seek you out if that’s what I was after? No, no, you’re dead like me and I need something that can hurt like me. So hurt me, Joel.” 

He was hesitant at first. He’d never done something like this. Not that he’d ever felt like he was the love making type - never fucked someone he was in love with enough to find out - but he liked to leave his women satisfied and well fucked, not beaten and bloody. 

But something in him he didn’t even know was still there awoke at that thought, the thought of giving someone something they needed. The thought of doing something that he could see and feel unlike everything else in this Godforsaken place. Didn’t matter how many bodies he burned, there were always more waiting. Always more to trudge through, more to try to survive when he didn’t even want to do that. 

This was different. You were different. 

He spread your legs wider and lined himself up with your entrance, acutely aware of his size and strength for the first time in years. How easy it would be for him to break you, to hurt you beyond the hurt you were asking for. He was, suddenly, brutally substantial and corporeal. 

“Tell me if it’s too much,” he said, taking your waist in his hands and digging harshly into the softness there. 

You laughed darkly. 

“Sure, Joel.” 

He still remembered the look on your face when he fucked into you, hard and fast, for the first time, forcing your walls apart, the rough grip of your cunt around him. You weren’t wet enough to take him properly yet, he knew it had to hurt. The kind of hurt you’d asked him for. But there was life in your eyes as you gasped, your back arching. You were alive, buried deep somewhere inside yourself, and Joel was forcing that life to the surface of you. He had that power. The power to force you to feel.

You’d never asked him for mercy, never asked him for a break or even to slow down, not once in the years the two of you had been doing this. You took what he gave you into yourself, took all his hate and his rage and his numbness until there was nothing left but you and the small hurts he peppered over your skin. 

Joel wrapped his fist around your hair and pulled, yanking your head back with a surprised little yelp. His other hand went to your back, forcing you into a deeper arch so his cock was slamming into your cervix. You liked it when he made you hurt inside, too. He found it in the strange satisfaction on your face when you moved the next morning after he fucked you again, the new bruises darkening on your skin as you got dressed, the involuntary wince when you walked the first few steps setting off a perverse sense of pride in him. 

He’d given you what you needed and you were the proof of it. Proof he was alive enough to break someone if he wanted to. 

“Fuck,” you panted, your pussy tightening around him. “More, Joel, fuck, please…” 

“More?” He managed, voice strained. “You want more?” 

“Please,” you sounded on the verge of tears but your pussy got tighter. “Need it, need it so much.” 

He yanked on your hair again, pulling your body to be sitting up, your back pressed flush against his front. One of his hands roughly grabbed a fistful of tit flesh and squeezed until your soft breast wouldn’t give anymore. The other flew to your throat, gripping the column of it tight, your head dropping back to his shoulder. He bit at your jaw as you whimpered and moaned, his hold on you getting tighter as he fucked up into you. 

“This what you needed?” He panted, desperate, his orgasm close. “What you wanted?” 

You struggled to nod and he pushed, sharp and hard and deep, into you as he felt you start to come around him and go limp. He came apart then, too, spilling against the spot he bruised inside you again and again. He loosened his hold on you as his orgasm eased and he felt you take a shaky, gasping breath against him before he lowered you to the bed and collapsed beside you. 

He watched as you came back into yourself, breaths easing, the hollow look coming back into your eyes. The ghost in his bed. But the beginnings of the bruises remained, the marks of him over your hips and breasts and waist and neck and legs and face. You’d be black and blue by morning. 

You sat up and Joel frowned as you started getting dressed. You always stayed after, always slept next to him so he could fuck you again in the morning, pressing his fingers back into the places on you that had gone from red to purple in the night. 

“Where you goin’?” He sat up on his elbows, watching you. 

“I’m leaving in the morning,” you said, looking down at your shirt as you buttoned it. 

“What?” He sat up all the way now, his stomach clenched tight. “What do you mean you’re leaving, where the fuck are you gonna go?” 

You shrugged. 

“Somewhere else,” you said. “Somewhere that isn’t here.” 

“Why?” He asked. “There someone you’re lookin’ for out there or…” 

“Joel,” you smiled a little at him and it actually reached your eyes, just a hint of the life he’d fucked to the surface left in them. “You don’t ask about what killed me, I don’t ask about what killed you. That’s the deal.” 

“The deal is we fuck each other to get by,” he snapped. “The deal ain’t you goin’ off on some goddamn suicide mission for…” 

“I’m not looking for anyone,” you said, voice oddly gentle. “I’m just looking for something better than here. There has to be something out there. This can’t be it, feeling this… I can’t live where I’m only alive in your bed anymore, I need more than that. I need to find something that will keep me alive or something that will kill me and I don’t really care which. Just need to find it.” 

The irony wasn’t lost on him. That you leaving to feel alive was making him feel more alive than he had in years. The fear was sharp and gripping, its hold desperate and aching. 

“I’ll come with you,” he began but you cut him off, tugging on your shoes. 

“No, you won’t,” you said, coming around to his side of the bed and sitting beside him. “I don’t know what killed you, Joel, I just know that it was something terrible. But I know you’re not as dead as me, not really. I’ve seen it. You can find shit to live for and you should. Live for Tommy for now. Find the other things later. It’s still inside you somewhere. That’s why you flinched. Don’t give up on it.” 

You kissed him then. A real, actual kiss, your hand on his face, your lips soft on his. There was nothing fierce or stinging to it, all soft and earnest tenderness. You smiled at him, almost sadly, when you pulled away and went for the door. 

“Take care of yourself, Joel.”

You left him there, staring at the void you’d left, with nothing but the memory of you and his bruises on your skin.  

A/N: My first (maybe only!) foray into a darker Joel. He gave me brain rot this weekend so I'm glad he's on the page. I hope you like it and thank you for reading! Love you!!