#danny: am i dating myself idk
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Sea Cryptic! Danny- pt. 10
[Pt.1] [Pt.2] [Pt.3] [Pt.4] [Pt.5] [Pt.6] [Pt.7] [Pt.8] [Pt.9]
âThis you?â
Danny glanced at the stone tablet in Spoilerâs hands and groaned, Phantom form flickering with embarrassment as his face got even more neon green. It was indeed him.
ââ
The first Atlantean and Ghost King encounter went something like this:
Imagine Danny, sleep deprived. Easy enough. Now, imagine Danny, trying to corral a ghost that had a penchant for sea life.
âAlabastor, I swear to Ancients, if you donât get back here, Iâm gonna make you into ghost sea-food boil!â Danny yelled as he chased Alabastor through the ghost zone. The crustacean shaped ghost cackled, skittering along the Zone.
"Make me, Phantom! You have not seen the might of the sea!"
"That's it, soup-time, crabby!"
Danny dove after Alabastor, chasing him face first into a temporal portal and right into the sea.
"BEHOLD!" Alabastor rumbled, claws raised and sea churning around him. Danny flew at him, noticing the screaming people below. He quickly raised a dome of clear ice to protect their entire city before returning his attention back to the giant crustacean. The distraction cost him, as Alabastor blasted him with a beam of his power. "THE MIGHT OF THE SEA!"
"SOUP!" Danny bellowed back, Alabastor's power forcing him into a giant crab form, aside from, hilariously, his head. Danny, always quick to adapt, slammed a massive claw straight into one of Alabastor's eyes and popped open the Fenton Thermos with a feral grin. In but moments, Danny manages to soup Alabastor but not before slamming him down onto the unbreakable ice Danny had just made.
Carefully turning by skittering sideways, he unmelted his ice.
"Sorry about that," he said sheepishly to the gawking civilians below.
"Suh-ree? What is suh-ree?" A brave woman asked.
"Oh," Danny uttered as he realized that he should probably switch languages. His giant crab body and small itty bitty human head swayed in an unsure motion. "Sorry means "my apologies." I had not meant to involve you. I am Phantom."
"It is alright... thank you for protecting us... God Phantom?"
He grimaced. "Not a god."
"King, then." She stepped forward. "May I ask of the ice?"
ââ
Spoiler, sensing weakness like the Riddler to a riddle, leaned in. "Did you know they have a traditional dance to honor the god that gave them the unbreakable ice that protects Atlantis to this day? It goes like this," Spoiler stepped back and did the dance, complete with exaggerated arm movements and, embarrassingly, the scuttle walk Crab!Danny was forced to learn with his new crab form.
"We shall never speak of this again," Danny huffed.
"But King Phantom, the God of Eternal Ice and Protection, how could we not celebrate your iciness?" Spoiler simpered, Black Bat not too far away and shaking with laughter. The purple donning vigilante did the scuttle dance once more, picking up bottles as she went a small circle around one of Bludhaven's rock beaches.
Danny scowled and plucked the tablet away from her, hair flowing an a more agitated direction. His jumpsuit burned brighter. "Why are you two menaces in Bludhaven? I thought your territory was in Gotham."
"Nightwing asked for back up and we were in the area." Spoiler, blessedly, stopped the walk to answer him. "By the way, are you and Danny dating?"
"Pardon?" He asked, insulted but highly amused.
"Oh, you know, he has your number, and you only ever talk to him outside of us, and how you guys have a high level of communication." Spoiler said leadingly.
Oh, Danny knew what this was about now. He found out their identities and now these two are interrogating him because he liked them best. They thought they were so clever. Well, they clearly haven't gotten to know Danny at all if they thought he was going to make good decisions.
Danny tilted his head, making sure his face gets as eerie as possible, shadows elongating and eyes burning just that much brighter. The neon green of his face shone even brighter against the suddenly dark landscape of the place. Black Bat stood up, laughter seizing immediately. Spoiler tensed.
"I have a riddle for you. You are good at those, are you not?"
Spoiler blinked but gamely said, "Bring it."
"What do these things have in common? An arguing couple, papers on a stranger's desk, and Star City's robbers."
"..." Spoiler slipped into her solving mode. "Stolen goods. Stolen hearts?" She guessed.
"No. The answer is that they're all none of your business," Danny snarled. His form flickered. "Keep your questing away from Danny- Daniel, vigilante. Your duty is to protect your city and help her," Danny swept an arm out. "Stick to that instead of inserting yourself into places you are not wanted."
Then, with a toss of an ecto-crossed recorder that held the verbal report he'd promised Nightwing towards Black Bat, Danny blinked out of the visible spectrum and flew above the two.
"... Shit, I think I pissed him off."
Black Bat nodded. "He was defensive."
"Yeah... did you hear that slip? Oh, they are so dating."
Danny grinned. He couldn't wait for Tim to interrogate him soon.
ââ
"You're kidding."
Danny shook his head, maniacal grin still on his face hours later. He'd taken the liberty to call his best friends before classes started for the day.
Tucker groaned. "Danny, I can't believe you're messing with Batman. Why are you like this."
"Look, I need your help."
"Oh no, keep me out of your dumbass plans, Fenton," Sam pointed at him through the screen, immaculately painted black nails threatening.
"Okay, if you go along with my plan, I'll give you Dr. Isley's number."
"Deal," Sam said immediately, changing her tune at a drop of a hat. Or, at a drop of a number.
"What about me?" Tucker asked, offended. "I deserve compensation for my work too, dammit!"
"I'll give you Tim Drake's number and persuade him to let you have a crack at Wayne Industry's tech basement."
"Deal, what are we doing?"
Danny's grin spread even wider. "We're dating. And, you two? You're Phantom's exes. Tucker, you say good stuff about me. Sam? You make up terrible things about me. But we're all dating each other and I'm dating Phantom on the side."
"I hate you," Sam deadpanned. "But fine, it's not that hard. I've got tons of embarrassing stories about Phantom. You better get me that number, Danny, because you know Dr. Isley was my gay awakening."
"For Tim Drake, I'd be willing to puff up your ego." Tucker said solemnly.
"Perfect. I'm cleaning his brother of ectoplasm today. so expect a call later! Love you guys!"
"Yeah, yeah, whatever, boyfriend." Sam clicked off the call.
"Think Tim Drake would be interested in a date?" Tucker asked Danny.
"Nah, I think he's got his heart on Benard."
"Damn," Tucker sighed. "Guess I'll have to mend my broken heart with the tools of a state-of-the-art lab, right, Danny?"
"Yep, see ya!" Danny hung up. Today was going to be a good day.
#batman#danny phantom#dcxdp#dpxdc#sea cryptid danny phantom#danny: am i dating myself idk#the bats are good at conclusions#they tend to be right#so when they're wrong they're *wrong*#sea cryptic! danny au
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â MAKE IT REAL | OP81
Scenario: basically âthe winner takes allâ, but oscar editionâŠor, the one where despite yn being the closest to oscar, no one suspects the two to be dating. that is, until a video of the pair at a valley concert comes out. (inspired by the song âCureâ by Valley (bless @renarots for this one))
Pairing: oscar piastri x fem!reader
A/N: squadron, it is an oscar day. it took me entirely too long to get to this request, but iâve finally made it. i hope you guys like this fic as much as i liked making it đ«¶đ»
MASTERLIST
ynln on instagram
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ynln happy halloween đđ
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landonorris why is oscar standing like that
‷ ynln heâs just a boy leave him alone
papayabull MY BABIES THEYRE SO CUTE
dreamyalbon this friendship is everything to me
‷ formulaferrari not a single thing about yn and oscars relationship is giving âfriendsâ but okay
‷ dreamyalbon thereâs no way theyâre anything more than friends though đ
rizzciardo the way ynâs whole feed is becoming oscar is so funny
formulaverstappen whoâs gonna tell them that daphne and fred had a romantic relationship
‷ ln4nation to be fair, itâs pretty common for friends to go as romantic duos, platonically.
ynln on instagram
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ynln the best mornings âïž (also i made oscar the bracelet heâs wearing in the third slide i feel so proud of myself)
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oscarpiastri â€ïž
riabish second slide đ„č
‷ norrisnation ria and ynâs friendship is my favorite thing ever
dreamyalbon yn making oscar a bracelet is so cute </3
formulaferrari another day, another oscar post from yn. i love it here
landosbeachball THE ONLY BESTIES EVER đ«¶đ» the slide of them holding hands omg
f1wagsdaily on Instagram
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f1wagsdaily do you think yn ln is dating anyone on the grid? if so, who? đ
(left to right) yn and lando, yn and daniel, yn and charles
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norrisnation im so convinced that if itâs anyone itâs danny ric đ how do you go to music festivals and football games together so often and NOT date
‷ charlesrrari yes but also they donât hang out NEARLY as much anymore? also to be fair, ynâs closest friend - oscar aside - is lando, so itâs kind of natural that she would be in the mclaren garage more, so it just SEEMS like itâs daniel? idk im not convinced that itâs him
formula44 idk i feel like lando is the only one that makes sense
‷ papayabull what about oscar?
‷ formula44 idk i just canât see them together
xf1x oscar piastri (solely based on how much theyâre togwther)
‷ papayanorris lore drop: yn rejected oscar in f3 because he was too busy so id imagine itâs the same now đ€·đ»ââïž
‷ xf1x to me that makes it seem more likely since that means they were obviously interested in each other?
‷ papayanorris good point but maybe theyve moved on? đ
‷ pastrypiastri okay but imagine dating oscar and heâs THAT close with another girl, and same with yn being that close with another guy? idk this thread might have put me on the ynoscar agenda đ€
shumirrari wild guess: jenson button (if you know you know)
‷ chilisainz what am i missing?
‷ shumirrari basically lando and jenson button are sort of friends so lando introduced yn to jenson at a race, and lando took pictures of them together. iâm pretty sure yn posted them a while back? idk but it was just a silly guess (her and jenson would be cute though, but i highly doubt itâs them LMAO)
formulaferrari i am TIRED why does no one have faith in the oscyn agenda
‷ formulaferrari also does no one notice that oscar always is kind of shy around yn or am i actually delusional on this one
‷ charlesrrari wait lowkey youâre onto something rn đ
grandprixsandgossip on Instagram
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grandprixsandgossip Oscar Piastri and Yn Ln, a known friend of many drivers on the grid, seen kissing outside of a concert arena last night.
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norrisnation girl thereâs three pixels on my screen that could be anyone
papayabull oscar jack piastri what are you DOING
piastrisgirl never, and i mean NEVER, did i expect that out of all the f1 drivers, oscar would be the one where we find out about his girlfriend like this
ln4world this cannot be real
formulaferrari SCREAMING IM INSANE THIS IS EVERHTINH TO ME
stardustf1 okay but wasnât oscar wearing a hoodie in the other picture that the one guy posted?
‷ rizzciardo yes, but iâm assuming oscar took the hoodie off and gave it to yn, because not only can you see her wearing a hoodie in this picture (even though itâs blurry, it looks like the same one oscar was wearing), AND ria posted a story of her and yn goofing off after the concert where yn was wearing a black hoodie so đ
chilisainz were not gonna mention yn in the likes?
‷ norrisnation sheâs having her pierre moment đ€·đ»ââïž
ynln on Instagram
đ¶ Cure - Valley
liked by oscarpiastri, landonorris, alex_albon, danielricciardo, and 124,521 others
ynln concerts are my heaven, but theyâre paradise when iâm with him đ«¶đ» @/oscarpiastri is my concert buddy for life whether he wants it or not
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landonorris but are you dating or?
‷ ynln iâm gonna need you to be so fr rn lando
oscarpiastri fortunately for us, iâm more than happy to be your concert buddy. â€ïž
‷ ynln music to my ears đ
riabish literally the cutest couple i know *liked by ynln*
princepiastri THE CAPTION, OSCARS COMMENT, THE PICTURES?? THIS IS THE WORST DAY OF MY LIFE
formula44 yn im sorry for not believing in you and oscar
dreamyalbon AND WHOS GOING TO MENTION THE SONG??
‷ yukit22enthusiast AS A VALLEY LOVER I AM RIGJT THERE WITH YOU
formulaferrari THE FACT THAT THESE SRE ALL DIFFERENT CONCERTS OH MYGOD
formulaferrari i can finally call them my parents and not get flamed
papayabull and so whatever you do donât listen to the song because iâm so upset
‷ stardustf1 someone harassed(/j) the guy who took the picture of them at the concert into telling them what song was playing when he took that picture and it was cure đ« đ
‷ papayabull NOOOOO itâs officially their song, i donât make the rules
TAGLIST
@renarots @jsjcue @treehouse-mouse @lovstappen @illicitverstappen @vellicora @lokietro @arkhammaid @piasstrisblog @leclercvsx @i-love-ptv @pretty-little-bunny382728 @kortneej81 @elliegrey2803 @marshmummy @spidersophie @stopeatread @minkyungseokie @jellyfish123guts @harrysdimple05 @fastcarsandshit @motorsp0rt @sadieurlady @cixrosie @hiireadstuff
Thank you for reading! All feedback is appreciated đ
#â© . opâžÂč files ïżœïżœïž#oscar piastri x reader#oscar piastri smau#formula one smau#formula one#f1 x reader#f1 imagine#f1 drabble#f1 fanfic#f1 x you#formula one fanfiction#f1 fic#f1 smau#f1 x female reader#formula one social media au#formula one x y/n#formula one x you#formula one blurbs#formula one x reader#formula one fluff#formula one fic#oscar piastri x you#oscar piastri#op81 x reader#op81 imagine
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ok so like there are two parts of me, right? well there are a lot of parts but english is hurting me right now and my head isn't working so you will make due/do(?)
anyways one part is like: my sense for gay people is strong, i think i know which f1 drivers are gay and i am confident in my answers
but the other part is like: its wrong to speculate sexuality because if people havent come out then they either aren't ready to be out or aren't gay, but at the same time this generation is moving away from the construct of coming out so like... idk.
today the first part is stronger, though, so i want to share my speculations because everyone in the states only watches nascar and is a hick and i'm scared of them. they also do not like my italian accent :(
1. Max Verstappen
come on guys, any gay person could tell u he's probably bi. i mean he doesn't even try to hide it, u know? like there are compilations of him being fruity. and they are shockingly long.
he's mentioned using grindr, he's mentioned girls OR guys when talking about dating preferences, the whole thing with the freaking lei (i think thats how it is spelled, the hawaiian thing? the flower necklace?). the list goes on and on.
he's had girlfriends, and i'm pretty sure they weren't beards but i'm not sure. i'm leaning towards bi tho for this reason.
even if he isn't bi or gay or pan or whatever, he's at least incredibly comfortable with queerness and is probably a really cool dude. annoying when i'm watching the sunday races, but love him the rest of the time!
2. Lando Norris
lando is a bit more subtle with it (as are the other ppl in the list). emphasis on a bit, though.
unless you live under a rock, you've probably seen this gif:
this has called many aboard the lando is a little fruitcake train. what people don't realise is that he "eye fucks" or like... stares lovingly a lot.
other examples include:
staring lovingly at carlos sainz
checking out charles leclerc (kind of? i think he is checking him out)
staring lovingly at carloz sainz
this weird ass moment with, you guessed it, carloz sainz
there are a lot of these photos and clips out there, but i'm lazy and don't feel like looking for them so yeah. take my word for it.
i saw a post saying that if carlos and lando pulled up to the paddock holding hands and telling people they were dating they wouldn't be shocked. i agree with this statement entirely. as was stated, it takes a lot to get to that point, and we're at that point.
now i grew up a gay dude to a conservative family, and i know the little mannerisms that are like... a part of being gay? and i know what it looks like to hide them.
i do not know if this is the right way to say it or if it is politically correct, but i believe it to be true. gay men tend to have little mannerisms here and there that give us away a bit, and i think i've seen some of those in lando.
i don't think i will share them though, as i don't want to accidentally push harmful stereotypes or whatever. obviously not all gay men have gay mannerisms and it might be something lando is insecure about so i would rather not put them on blast.
if it's not a bad thing i may come back and edit this and add them in. idk, let me know i guess? i am still learning american customs.
3. Yuki Tsunoda
this is probably going to be the shortest section (ha).
yuki mostly just makes my radar go off. i don't consume alphatauri content as much, but i know there was a thing with him and pierre that was just crazy last year and the year prior. don't know as much about it as i should haha.
but yeah. yuki just sends my radar into the astral plane (is that a thing? i am doubting myself). if he is not at least bisexual i will eat my own foot.
maybe that one moment between him and michael italiano has just gotten to me, i don't know. i trust in my instincts though.
Honourable Mentions
4. Danny Ric
idk he just gives the vibe! i don't know how to explain my radar. gay people know. i think it is called gaydar.
DR is on it.
5. Carlos Sainz
he is probably on my gaydar the least, but he's still on there. latest vlog he gently combed his finger through ruperts hair. he's probably deeply in love with lando. just little things like that i guess!
6. Oscar Piastri
this may be wishful thinking. i sit in bed at night and pray that he is into men.
that is all! thank you for learning about fruity drivers with me! please do not cancel me if i am doing something politically incorrect! i am still learning!
#f1#formula 1#max verstappen#lando norris#yuki tsunoda#daniel ricciardo#danny ric#carlos sainz#carlando#oscar piastri#lgbtq
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idk if anyone will read this but honestly, this coming out post is mostly for me. ex-philosopher and youtuber Natalie Wynn (Contrapoints) said in her lesbian coming out video that if she didnât come out now, she might never and she might never accept herself as a lesbian and thatâs why im writing this. putting these feelings into words makes them real and makes me confront them. iâm a transsexual (i think nonbinary people are valid, i just think that sex isnât binary and unchanging and ive taken steps to change/trans aspects of mine), and until i was almost 21, i lived as a femme gay man. i was raised as a boy and the intersection of my dysphoria, heteronormativity and father inflicted abandonment issues is something im only now starting to disentangle. ever since i was little, i felt like a girl. i didnât have the words for it but i always was drawn towards femininity and women. and when they first started separating the boys and girls in like pe in 1st grade, there was this profound sense of wrongness in being forced to go with the boys. i had a necessity to not only be with the girls but to be one. in elementary school i had crushes on girls irl and in media but i only had crushes on men in games my dad played and things i watched. dante from devil may cry, leon from resident evil, danny in danny phantom, ben and kevin from ben 10 to name a few. but i didnât have crushes/attraction on any boys that i knew. that didnât start until 5th grade when i started experiencing a male puberty. testosterone is one hell of a drug that i am so grateful to be off but it raised my libido like crazy suddenly i was sexually attracted to people and a year later in 6th grade i started being attracted to boys too. growing up with mormon extended family and christians all around me, i was taught that my feelings for men was wrong. but deep down i felt like a girl and i felt that being with another girl would solidify that im actually male, in patriarchy having a woman makes you a man. so to feel feminine and because the church focuses so heavily on it, i focused on my sexual attraction to men. i still had crushes on girls but i felt dysphoric about it an because i wasnât really a guy, i felt that i was inadequate. so i started thinking that i wanted a romantic relationship with a man. in high school i came out as gay and repressed my feelings for women entirely. i thought that because i had sexual desires for men, i must have romantic desires for them too. at the same time, i would joke about how id be bi if i was a girl and when i saw sapphic love in media, not sex, something in me felt fulfilled. i wanted that. i wanted to love and be loved by a woman as a woman. the idea of being an old woman with my loving wife was heaven, but i thought that i wasnât allowed to have it, not in this life. but because i felt like womanhood was unattainable, that a man would affirm my femininity and my sexual attraction to men, i think i tricked myself into thinking i wanted to be in a relationship with a man. i donât think i was really attracted to men, i was attracted to their attention. when i finally started to transition, and pass as a cis woman, i looked back at my life and realized that i had been attracted to women the whole time. i identified as bisexual and heteroromantic to dismiss my feelings for women. but then i went on a date with this girl. she was beautiful and smart and talented. and i realized that i could spend the rest of my life with a woman. the reason i didnât pursue women was because it made me dysphoric and because the thought of being rejection from a woman hurt so much more than rejection from a man. i currently have a serious boyfriend and heâs making me realize that i donât want this. men are hot but do i want to spend the rest of my life with one?? did i ever?? i didnât ever consider a relationship with a woman as a valid option for me but iâm
realizing itâs the only one. my bf is kinda mean and impatient but even is he was gentle and kind, im realizing i donât want to be with him or any man romantically. i donât think i have the capacity to love a man romantically and i donât know if i ever did. i can love men sexually and platonically but when i wake up in the morning, i want to wake up next to my gf/wife. i want to have a common understanding of womanhood that a man, including my trans bf, canât really have. i want to come home to my gf after a hard day and let me cook and bake my worries away for her. i want to be able to comfort her when she comes home. being domestic and romantic with a man, especially a volatile one, is making me realize that i canât keep doing this. i might want to hook up with a guy here or there, but i want to give my heart and my body and my self to a woman. being financially dependent makes it hard to leave though đ
#lesbian#comphet#wlw#transbian#coming out#my bf isnât abusive just kinda toxic and weâre bad for each other
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First Lines :)
tagged by the wonderful @alllthequeenshorses who has been writing The Old Guard joe/nicky fics that deserve to be read!! go check them (and other good reads) out!
i, myself, have been sitting peaceably in the phandom quicksand. more specifically, the phandom quicksand that is crossed over with DC :)
~
As king, Danny is beholden to the emotions of his subjects, is able to feel them in the bottled swirl of an orb, the centerpiece to his icy crown.
i had the VIVID mental image of danny dragging a dead joker thru the streets of Gotham in a color blocking sort of thing? where it's a dark grey silhouette outline of danny and joker's body on a black street lined with towering white buildings- joker is trailing red and danny's looking back, eyes glowing green. a red sky and people observing on the streets. i might do this with colored paper? tmr actually since i've got the time
Approximately 54 minutes ago, Damian set off his panic button on his civilian identity.
i do not particularly like this line; i gotta go find batman's voice later, but i haven't found a way to continue Unknown Caller ID that i am happy with. please be patient with me, and if you have anything you think might happen/could see happening, i'm always up for a chat abt my fics! drop into my ask box! (anon is on too)
Theyâre in a transitional period now.
timeskip just slip me on, i'll be your blanket???? is that you??? guys idk if i'll finish it since it's mostly directionless rn, but istg in my heart of hearts it's not really finished and i'll never be free until i'm satisfied
Spencer stepped out of the elevator, sipping from his to-go coffee cup.
i found out about danny phantom x criminal minds, specifically the spencer reid is a gothamite trope, and I Need More. gotta do whatcha gotta do.
Today is the day.
from the Young Justice part of dc (screw it not being continuity, and also wally is dating dick wdym) crossed over with dp, of course, where danny joins the justice league as a consult/doomsday protocol, but he lives at the hall of justice and acts as a heimdall??? basically. the extended league is awkward around him bc he reminds them that they can't save everyone; inspo'd by a fic
Damian was gone.
not a cross over, it's just dc. is more of a character study on Alfred Pennyworth, maybe? but also i'm not really pulling from observing a ton of canon, it's more of my understanding and imagination on him and his relationships (and how his family's night activities affect him) [i love him and david mccallum is MY alfred]
~
aaand that's abt it, in terms of new things i've worked on in the past four weeks! imma try to tag some new folks (hello there!!), but no pressure, and anyone is welcome to post their first lines (tag me, i'd love to see them!)
@shire-bard @snakeinmeboots808 @lord-of-0blivion @crazycatgirl420 @astralalmighty @spacedace
đ.
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I don't know what specific time your active, but how do you feel about tigerghost (Danny Phantom X Manny Rivera from "El tigre")?? Boyfailure (Danny) and bossgremlin (Manny)
i'm typically pretty sporadic but i tend to leave the browser/tabs open, kind of a mixed bag for whether i'm *actually* on or not. i have been on more frequently lately tho
i'll be honest, i just don't think i'm all that big on cartoon ships or crossover ships in general. it's just not where my interests lie.
don't get me wrong, love me a good cartoon and a cute couple~<3 but even the type of stuff i watch tends to be adult cartoons, mostly satire. morbid and horror driven too. (apart from all the comics stuff of course)
so think 'archer', 'ugly americans', 'futurama', to name a few faves for me<3 (and even then, i'm not so much shipping what out of their canon. i'm satisified enough that idk if i'd write fanfic for them, maybe archer and barry lmao)
and this might be controversial... but for me? the more fucked up and damaged the characters/subject matter? the more fascinated and hooked i end up lol
i may be carbon dating myself with this, but for me personally, i didn't deep dive into fanfic and shipping til i hit my 20s, still had/have *a lot* to learn, and even then it was with manga and doujinshi works that slowly worked me to that place, so it feels a little weird for me to go back to the stuff i might have watched in my childhood to look for ships. (especially with the kinda raunchy type fanfic i write ;))))))))))))))))))))
i know a lot of people love that stuff and that's great~! ship whatever the fuck ya want, especially the crack ships! you have my full support on that<3
it's just a little... *odd* for me personally to think about shipping those characters lmao. like they're too innocent for my nonsense i guess. but that's just a personal hang up i guess. still, i'm comfortable where i am shipping shitty trash men~<3 and gorgeous women~<3 all around the block.
as always tho, any prompts/ideas i come up with for any ship are always free to use/alter how you see fit for any kinda ship ;)
i wanna inspire and help spread the love of creativity i have, so i don't care so much how that comes along so long as they get to be happy with their own, y'know?
;)
#lmao#thanks for the ask!#precious anon#shipping#multishipper#creativity#do your thing#ship what you want#not for me#but you have my support~<3#queued stuff for everyday posts
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for the ask thing: 001, doctor who
iâve never watched any of it myself ^^; but i see all your rbs and idk iâm a bit curious lol
Thank you for following my Doctor Who reblogs :âD Iâm not THAT deep into the lore of DW and Iâve only watched as far back as the Ninth Doctor, so I donât get every reference but I still enjoy the show for the entertainment value.Â
Favorite character: Itâs a tie between the Ninth Doctor (played by Christopher Eccleston) and recently the Fifteenth Doctor (played by Ncuti Gatwa)
Least Favorite character: I canât remember if thereâs a character I outright LOATHE⊠but from what I remember, I always found the The Trickster to be a great, cruel villain. While Iâm not sure if he appears in the main series of Doctor Who, he appeared in The Sarah Jane Adventures spinoff. The Tricksterâs whole deal was⊠making deals with desperate people. Such as switching the fates of a young Sarah Jane and her deceased best friend. Or making a deal with a dead man to marry a brainwashed Sarah Jane. I felt very sorry for the people he tricked. So, great villain but I didnât like him!
5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon):
Uh⊠Captain Jack Harkness/Ninth Doctor, Amy/Rory, The Lizard Lady/Her Female Companion (Iâm sorry, I forgot their names), Martha/William Shakespeare (because Martha deserves to be immortalised in Shakespeareâs plays), Donna/Shaun
Character I find most attractive: Amy Pond
Character I would marry: Shaun. His wife and daughter show up with aliens at their house and he just accepts it. Doesnât even blink. Donnaâs best friend the Doctor has come back as a new reincarnation and is now living at their house? Shaun just accepts it.
Character I would be best friends with: Rose
A random thought: Will David Tennant return to the series again?
An unpopular opinion: As much as I adore David Tennant, the Tenth Doctor is kind of a jerk and his storylines got far too serious and grandiose
My canon OTP: Uh⊠Clara/Danny. Their story made me emotional⊠Also, I havenât watched all of the Thirteenth Doctorâs run but Thirteen/Yasmin looks cute. I hope they became canon? We invented a whole other Tenth Doctor clone so that Rose/Ten could be a thing in some form. SURELY Yasmin gets her own Thirteenth Doctor clone?
Non-canon OTP: Rose/Martha. Why pine over the Doctor when they can date each other
Most badass character: Martha. This quote still lives in my head rent free: âI travelled across the world. From the ruins of New York, to the fusion mills of China, right across the radiation pits of Europe. And everywhere I went I saw people just like you, living as slaves! But if Martha Jones became a legend then that's wrong, because my name isn't importantâ
Pairing I am not a fan of: Rose/Doctor in a romantic sense
Character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another): Martha deserved so much betterÂ
Favourite friendship: Rose & Ninth Doctor
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tagged by @howdydowdy <3 thankss!! i also don't watch a tonne of shows but i do watch a lot of films so i'm gonna do a combo of the two lol
8 shows/films to get to know me
borstal boy (2000(?) film) - watching this as a teen Changed me tbh... it also definitely gave me one of my first glimpses of a bisexual character on screen... also danny dyer plays a gay sailor in this i mean??? what more could you want lol (also feel like this film is equal parts depressing and hopeful which is my ideal kinda film lol)
the simpsons - i watched this religiously as a kid (every night at 6pm on channel 4 lol) so much so that my family makes jokes that everything i know i know from the simpsons lol...
would i lie to you? (uk panel show) - i feel like this show really explains a lot of my style of humour (i've literally nearly pissed myself whilst watching this show at times lol), plus i've had a crush on david mitchell for years which like no that isn't relevant to this list but i'm including it anyway... one of my fav clips is 'lee mack's keys' (give it a search on youtube it's hilar lol)
watership down (1970s animated film, i also love the book too btw) - the animation style of the very first part of this film has literally never left me, it's like ingrained onto my brain as the most incredible thing ever! the rest of the film is also amazing, albeit brutal at times which definitely fucked me up as a kid... esp that evil rabbit (wormwort?), pretty sure i was terrified of him lol
hook (1990s film (yes i know i could look up the exact date but i'm not gonna cos i'm lazy)) - this is one of the films that i know so many quotes from & me and my family use them to each other all the time lol (you're doing it peter! RUFIO RUFIO RU FI OHHHHH you're. afraid. you're. going. to. get. sucked. out. stop acting like a child!! i am a child!? RUN HOME JACK RUN HOME JACK wait...HOME RUN JACK HOME RUN JACK don't stop me smee don't stop me stop me smee stop me ... you get the picture lol) robin william's films just have a special place in my heart and this is one of the best imo
gayle (youtube comedy series) - it's embarrassing how much i think about this series & i literally rewatch it at least once every year so... i feel like that says a lot about me... idk WHAT exactly it says but it is.. it's a lot lol
i'm a cyborg but that's ok (2008(??) film) - if you asked me what my favourite park chanwook film is, you'd probs guess i'd pick the handmaiden, but you'd be so so so wrong, because THIS film is an absolute masterpiece that hasn't left me since my sister showed it to me like 10 years ago lol... it's about mental illness and stigma and grief and love and also rain (the singer) yodels in it whilst flying through the air it's great
labyrinth (1986 film (hey i actually remembered the date lol!) - i'm been thinking for ages what final thing to include and realised it had been staring me in the face: labyrinth, literally my favourite film of all time lol! it's equal amounts comedic, creepy, emotional, plus david bowie is there in ALL his glory (some may say too much glory but i'd tell them to shut their goddamn mouths lol)! the songs are amazing, the ballroom scene literally shaped who i am now.. it's a film about adolescence, siblings, it's about friendship and found family, it's about growing up but also keeping your childhood close at heart, should you need it... it's also about david bowie's bul- *gunshot*
that's all folks! i did try and not just include stuff that i'm nostalgic about, but unfortunately nostalgia is my middle name so most of these are things i've connected to for a very long time...
tagging (no pressure to actually do it ofc, the original prompt is 8 shows i think but you can essentially change it to 8 anything in my book lol): @dollopheadsandclotpoles @wovesaxe @micamicster @platypusplayhere @sylvasa @asoftspotforangels @zelvuska
#i actually tagged people omg?!#i havent read this through so this may be insane ramblings....#tbf even if i did read it through it would still be that so...#personal#tag game#i feel like these are definitely representative of me lol...#random comedies/heartfelt dramas about friendship and family and love/specifically british stuff/nostalgia/etc
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So sorry for the obnoxiously long streamline of thoughts:
GET YOU A FRIEND LIKE YIREN âi donât fawn over your future husbandâ FINALLY SOMEONE WHO GETS IT
Crushing on him for THREE YEARS poor y/n đ not three years thatâs miserable haha imagine calling a three year crush âa stupid crushâ đ (actually me in high school⊠this fic is too relatable so far)
65 alone in a cottage in the woods actually DOES sound enjoyable, but yiren is so right that same scenario with minghao đ€ sheâs kinda a genius
âNew, curated outfitâ beautiful writing muah muah CURATED is such a great word
Yiren is so real. Her mind is always on the right things. Girl has a goal and is constantly thinking of a plan to reach that goal. God i love her
MINGHAO?! BOBA DATE so soon đ
JUN AND THE YADA YADA IS SO CUTE IM GONNA DIE
The detail of Jun pressing his head back against the headrest at a stoplight is very important to me⊠itâs such a visual image idk it put in me in the car
This is so unimportant and unreleated but as i was reading i went to go listen to creep but i typed it in my apple music library not all of apple music and it pulled up in love with a creeper by danny gonzalez đ and equally unimportant i just realized the first time i ever heard this was in the new guardians movie
Yiren lost her voice at kareoke???? I love her
Maybe Iâm getting ahead of myself (i know i am) but obviously minghao loves her cause he remembered her jeans aND that she likes cola. Thatâs obviously love. Theyâre basically married already i love that for them
AH ITS THE SCENE ITS SUCH A GOOD SCENE
âYou donât want to be forgottenâ made me take a breather that line was REALLY impactful for some reason
âThe sorry i didnât tell you earlierâ MADE ME SCREAM FUCK THIS IS MAKING MY HEART HURT
NO NOT YIREN TOO I WONT RECOVER
I have a younger brother and heâs great or whatever but i want older brother jun SO BADLY
NONEXISTENT love life yn OPEN YOUR EYES minghao is so in love with her ugh SINGING CREEP IN THE CAR TOGETHER again, basically married??
YIREN COME BACK
YnynynynYN HE BASICALLY ASKED YOU TO MOVE TO KOREA FOR HIM??? MOVE TO KOREA FOR YOUR IDOL HUSBAND??? And your brother anD YIREN stupid i could hit yn right now
OH MY GOD WEEK IN THE KNEES SILENT SCREAM ALMOST FELL OVER YN HAS AN EX?!?! IM NOT BEING DRAMATIC WHAT
OH MY GOD IT GETS WORSE HE HAD THE PINK JACKET MINGHAOS PINK JACKET
WHY IS RENJUN LOOKING AT YN APOLOGETICALLY?!?! IF YOU TELL ME THAT HE BROKE UP WITH YN IM GONNA SCREAM⊠AGAIN
Of course minghao remembers renjuns name HES IN LOVE WITH YOU
Im gonna scream, HE TOOK YN TO THE POP SHOP AGAIN GOD HES SO IN LOVE WITH HER ITS PHSYICALLY HURTING ME
Heâs going swimming with her⊠jesus christ proposing left and right and shes blind to it⊠WHERE IS YIREN
HE SENT JUN THE VIDEO HAHA IM LAUGHING so funny he wasted ZERO time
Physical touch in fanfics makes me feral. HES NOT JUST CHECKING TO SEE IF YOURE SWOLLEN YN GOOD GOD read a magazine HE WANTS TO TOUCH YOU đ
MINGYU DOESNT MAKE THEM THE SAME AS YOU?!?! MINGYU?!?! Y/n i canât do it with you anymore heâs so obvious
AnOTHER comment about moving to korea⊠yn⊠i canât do it
TAKE PHOTOS FOR HIM OH MY GOD iâm realizing right now just how romantic-absent my life is. Iâd so seriously marry someone if they were treating me like this
THE CAPTION IS EVEN A CREEP REFERENCE. YN AND MINGHAOS SONG- oh my god i swear to god i wrote that before i read yn refer to it as their song too. I SWEAR
Minghao has me screaming I canât even articulate how angry i am at him right now.
I missed Yiren and her infinite knowledge. Sheâs so perfect
Okay okay okay i know minghao is like wildly in love with yn and i know that but also⊠YES YN FUCK AROUND try to fuck minghao out of your system PLEASE I LOVE THAT TROPE
Jun is killing me. HES SO CUTE
Minghao fight had me angry exhaling, but the Jun fight just felt like hot drama. I was like damnn. A brat?!?! Yes sis dish haha
YESYESYES IM SCREAMING I TOLD YOU HES IN LOVE WITH YOU YN
I love yn sheâs so real for her emotions
jianing⊠flying to korea is so yiren level thinkingâŠ
CURSE THAT EMOTIONALLY INTELLIGENT MAN IM cryinG SO FUNNY
I might just be stubborn but⊠unpopular opinion Jun shouldâve apologized first. YN TOOK THINGS A LITTLE TOO SERIOUSLY⊠i GUESS but still he was mean
Jun and y/n are cute⊠love the sibling coffee date đ«
No one is NEARLY surprised enough to see yn SHE FLEW UNANNOUNCED TO KOREA. Yâall are crazy
Im gonna die⊠zu i only have so much self control minghaoâŠ
THIS FIC WAS SO CUTE I CANT BELIEVE ITS OVER đđ I LOVED EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS IT WAS A WHOLE OTHER WORLD AND IT WAS SUCH A PERFECT WORLD This really made me miss high school, idk
the letter â x. minghao x reader
i hope one word, one letter, will laugh and cry with you (the letter / ateez)
description. in which youâre jun's little sister and have been pining for a man so close yet so out of reach for ages. now, years later, when you see minghao all grown up, famous, and still making your heart flutter, you're not so sure what to do about your not-so-little crush.
genres. slowburn, fluff, angst, childhood f2l tags. idol!au, alcohol consumption & underage drinking, lots of arguments, Lots of pent up emotions oops, miscommunication, sorta hot headed reader, minghao is minghao and that is a warning enough fic playlist. w/c. 26k a/n. the smut has been moved to a separate post which can be found here! i had so so so much fun writing this! huge thanks to @gyuswhore bc em literally helped me through every step of the way & sat through me planning & switching around the events of the story a bajillion times, and thank u to @honeyhypen who read over this for me ^-^
ENVELOPE
To: Xu Minghao
âWhy are you in my room?â Jun huffs, turning around to look up at you as you stand by his door. In front of him is a massive, yet unfinished LEGO replica of Hogwarts. You frown, glancing at his friend who lays on his bed with a phone up to his face.
Heâs Junâs new friend, and youâve heard your brother talk about him but this is your first time really seeing Minghao in the flesh. Shaggy hair hangs loose over his dark eyes as he peeks over his phone and glances at Jun, as if to silently ask who you are.
âDad says dinner is ready,â you tell him, feeling a little timid under the gaze of the new boy. Heâs only two years older than you, but the only interaction you get with high schoolers is your brother, so youâre feeling shy. Heâs a very nice looking boy, you think to yourself, but try hard not to stare as Minghao uncrosses his legs and sits up on your brother's bed.
Junâs eyes soften when he notices you standing awkwardly, standing up and pointing at you as he says your name. âMy sisterâtwo years younger,â he explains.
âOne point five, actually,â you correct him with a roll of your eyes, feeling more comfortable now that Jun is initiating something. Your brother laughs at you and ruffles your hair while Minghao stands up behind him.
âYa-da, ya-da. Youâre still two grades below, so it doesnât really make a difference. Anyways, this is Minghao,â he says, pointing at his friend behind him who throws you a small smile and wave.
âI know,â you blurt out before you even have a chance to think, heat flushing to your face after you realize what you said and see Minghao give you a funny look. âI-I mean because Jun talks about you a lot,â you clarify, clearing your throat. âYâknow, he doesnât have a lot of friends so whenââ
Jun clamps a hand over your mouth and gently drags you out of the room as Minghao follows behind closely with silent laughter. âThatâs enough from you. Watch it, or Iâm never letting you talk to my friends again.â
âFriends? I think you mean friend,â you retort, looking back at Minghao who watches the two of you amusedly. âAre you sure you want to be friends with someone so mean to his sistââ
Jun flicks your forehead and you push his chest. âShut up already! If you scare away all my friends, all Iâll have left is you, and youâll just have to put up with me all day!â
âYouâre right about that,â you say with a heavy sigh as you all make your way to the dinner table where your father has set out a meal for the three of you. Putting your hands up in defeat as you sit down at your spot at the middle end of the table, you glance at Minghao who takes a seat with Jun sitting between the two of you. âI guess Iâll back off for now.â
Jun scoffs. âYou better.â The three of you laugh together.
Yiren rummages through your closet, and you frown deeply. âHey! You better clean that up,â you warn, rolling off of your bed and onto the floor, lazily standing up.
âIâm helping you pick out a nice outfit! You said Minghao is coming riââ You scramble to your feet to slap a hand over Yirenâs mouth, eyes wide.
âShut up! My brotherâs room is right thereâhe might hear you!â
Yiren rolls her eyes, nudging your hand off her mouth with a huff. âOh my god, donât tell me you havenât told him yet.â
âWhat?â you narrow your eyes at her, grabbing one of your bras that she threw onto the ground and stuffing it back into your closet. âYou thought I was going to tell Jun that I have a crush on his best friend?â you half whisper, half yell.
âUh, why wouldnât you? Youâre seriously missing out on your chance to have him help you get with Minghao.â
You scoff, looking down at all the clothes strewn across the floor. âHave you met my brother? He would flip if I even mentioned being with a guy, let alone that guy being two years older and his friend.â
âYou donât know that,â Yiren retorts, throwing herself onto your bed leaving you to clean up the mess she made.
âYes I do. This is how I can tell you donât have any brothers âŠâ
âWell if you never make a move on Minghao, how are you ever going to get him? You gotta start somewhere, and maybe your brother is the first nut you gotta crack to get there.â
âIf you havenât noticed, I havenât exactly planned on making any moves,â you mumble, reaching down to pick up a cute pink jacket you havenât seen in a while.
âUh, why not?â Yiren piques, sitting upright on your mattress.
âExcuse me, have you looked at Minghao?â you groan, slumping against your wall with the jacket in your hands. âHeâs so ⊠cool, and popular, and handsome,â you gush, and Yiren makes a disgusted face.
âUh, no, sorry I donât fawn over your future husband, so I donât really look at Minghao butââ
âAnd heâs going to be a senior! Why would a senior ever go forââ you look down and gesture at yourself, ââme.â
âYouâre seriously downgrading yourselfâyou know youâre a catch.â
âYeah, not for someone like him,â you snort, flopping down onto your bed next to her. âItâs whatever, itâs a stupid crush anyways.â
âYeah,â Yiren says flatly. âYouâve only been crushing on him for like three yearsâhey! Donât hit me!â
âThen stop saying this stuff,â you groan, throwing a pillow onto her head.
âOkay fine, Iâll stop. So are you going to wear that?â she asks, pointing at the jacket you left at the foot of your bed.
âYeah, I think I will. Itâs cute right?â
âMhm ⊠bet Minghao will totally like it andââ
âYiren, shut up,â you giggle, pushing her again as you roll off the bed. âOkay, so the pink jacket and these jeans?â you ask, picking one pair off the ground and holding it up for her to see.
âMm, no,â she says while shaking her head, standing up to join you as she looks at all of the clothes she threw across the floor. âLetâs see âŠâ she hums to herself.
âYiren,â you say with a laugh, âI think youâre putting more thought into this than me.â
âWell I canât just let my best friend be single and lonely for the rest of her life! If all you do is sit around and listen to Radiohead, youâre going to end up being sixty-five and alone in some cottage in the woods.â
âHey! That actually seems pretty peaceful,â you try to object, but Yiren narrows her eyes in your direction.
âOkay well,â she drawls out, putting her hands on your shoulders so youâre right in front of her, âImagine being sixty-five and living in a cute cottage in the woods with Minghao. Sounds better, doesnât it?â You canât help the giddy grin that makes its way onto your face when Yiren says that, and she punches your shoulder lightly when she notices. âSee, you do want that! So just listen to me, okay?â
âOkay, okay, fine! Just tell me which jeans to wear.â
She looks down, picking through the denim before pulling out a light blue one with little flowers embroidered on the pockets. âLook, this is cute. Itâll match with the jacket.â
You nod along, not questioning her because as far as you know, Yirenâs fashionable instinct stretches much further than yours and whatever she says about this must be true. As you change from your pajamas into your new, curated outfit, Yiren sits back on the bed and grins widely.
âLooks perfect on you. Minghao will love it.â
âYou think?â you pique, looking at her with bright, beaming eyes.
She winks at you and you jump up and down on the balls of your feet at the excitement. âI want at least 25% of whatever you get from your wedding gifts. You both will owe me big time.â
âIâll believe it when it happens ⊠Anyways, you ready to go? Letâs wait downstairs and get some pop while we wait for Minghao to come,â you suggest, Yiren agreeing with a nod as she bounces behind you. Jun, it seems, is still in his room waiting for his friend, so you stick your head through his door. âWeâre going down to snack a little. Wanna come?â
Your brother shrugs, pushing himself off his swiveling chair to join you. âYou know if we still have those cupcakes? The ones you made last week?â
âI think we have a few left. Why? You liked them?â you exclaim happily, turning around to face Jun as the three of you settle in the kitchen. You reach for a box you kept on the island, popping off the lid to show him.
Jun grins and pulls one out and you offer one to Yiren who stands beside you. ââcourse I like them,â he says with his mouth stuffed with cake and cream.
Yiren, shooting a look of disgust his way, says, âEw! Please donât chew and talk, thatâs gross.â Jun rolls his eyes at her as Yiren stuffs her own face with the cupcake, sighing as she digs in.
âWhatever,â Jun grumbles after swallowing it down. âThey taste really good, you should make them more.â
Yiren nods, tapping your shoulder, âAgreed. Send me the recipe too,â voice muffled as she continues to munch down on the cupcake.
âDidnât you just tell me not to eat with my mouth full?â Jun mutters, crossing his hands over his chest. You laugh at the banter and suddenly you hear the doorbell ring, ears perking up. âThatâs probably MinghaoâIâll get the door.â
As your brother makes his way down to the foyer, you turn to look at Yiren. âI would give you the recipe but I donât want to be the reason your house burns down. Seriously, remember the last time you tried baking andââ
âOh my god, is the recipe what youâre thinking about right now? Minghao is just about to comeâoffer him a cupcake! Show him your amazing baking skills and show him what a good housewife you can be!â
You give your best friend a look of bewilderment. âWhat the hell Yiren,â you groan, slapping your hand on your face, trying to hold back your chuckles. âOkay, Iâll give it to him but only because I want him to be impressed. Not because I want to submit myself to misogyny for the sake of a man.â
âOkay fine butâlook!â she exclaims in a hushed whisper. âHeâs here!â You immediately straighten your back and smile when Jun walks back into the kitchen with Minghao. Heâs wearing some loose jeans and a black hoodie, his hair longer than before.
He says your name when he sees you, throwing up a wave and a smile. Minghao then glances at Yiren with a blank stare, pursing his lips together. Yiren chuckles nervously and clicks her tongue while pointing at herself. âYiren.â
âAh. Hi Yiren,â he says politely.
âYou guys want some pop?â Jun offers when he opens up the fridge. Yiren, Minghao, and you nod happily and respectively call out your choices.
âSprite!â
âCola!â
âCola!â
Jun juts his lip out in a pout when he turns back to the three of you. âI wanted Cola too, but thereâs only two left.â Youâre about to furrow your brows and tell him that itâs okay, you donât really want any, but Minghao speaks up before you.
âShe can have the Cola, I donât mind,â he says casually, grabbing one can from Jun and handing it to you with soft eyes. âHere.â
âAre you sure? I donât really care for the difference between Sprite and Cola andââ
Minghao chuckles and shakes his head, and you think you might just pass out when your palm brushes against his knuckles when he eases the cold can into your hand. âSeriously, itâs fine,â he tells you. You glance at Jun and Yiren who are busy opening their own cans, turning your attention back to Minghao.
âThank you ⊠Uh, do you want a cupcake? I made some a while ago and we still have some left,â you offer, holding up the box to him.
âItâs the last one. Are you sure?â
âHow the tables have turned,â you laugh, and Minghao cracks a bright smile at that and holy crap, if you werenât so busy trying to keep your composure, youâd be freaking out over how handsome he looks when he smiles. ââcourse you can have it. Iâve had plenty of them,â you admit sheepishly as he reaches for the cupcake and brings up to his mouth.
âHoly shit. I donât blame you for eating a lotâif I had these in my house theyâd be gone in like an hour.â
âRight!â Yiren agrees, and you canât help but chew on your bottom lip when you smile from the praise.
âGuess this is just a sign for you to make more, huh,â Jun says, walking to stand next to you to lean on your shoulder.
âUh-uh! You gotta reimburse me somehow,â you protest, looking up at your brother with a firm expression.
âPlease make more, theyâre really good. Iâll buy you boba if you make more,â Minghao chimes, and itâs safe to say you donât expect it from the way you cough on your own saliva. Yiren laughs at your reaction, and Jun only looks at you weirdly when you nod in agreement.
âOh, so youâll make cupcakes when he asks but not for your dear older brother?â
You roll your eyes, saying, âHe offered to buy me boba! You know I canât turn that down.â
Jun huffs in faux irritation, digging his hand into his pocket to fish out his keys. âYa-da, ya-da. Anyways, would anyone other than my super fake, mean, evil sister like to go to karaoke now?â he asks playfully. All it takes is one glare and pulling on his hair for a few seconds to have him shouting out apologies as the four of you make your way to the car garage.
The ride to the karaoke place is short with Jun in the front and Minghao sitting in the passenger seat next to him. You and Yiren pile into the back, and the three of you scroll through your phones to decide what songs to sing later while Jun drives.
âI get to sing Creep, right?â you ask excitedly, bouncing up and down in your seat.
âHowâd I know you were going to bring up Radiohead,â Jun mutters, pressing his head back into the head rest when he stops at a red light, while Minghao turns in his seat to look back at you with wide eyes.
âYou like Radiohead?â he asks with a small smile.
The corners of your lips are lifted and your face brightens when you nod vigorously. âYeah I do!â
âI think âlikeâ would be an understatement. Iâm like 99% sure Thom Yorke lives in her skin or something because what she has for Radiohead is a lot more than just âlike,ââ Yiren says.
âNo way, I love Radiohead,â Minghao tells you. Holy shit. So Minghao is attractive and nice and smart and pretty much perfect at everything and he enjoys Radiohead? You might go insane.
âReally?â Your eyes are wide with your jaw hanging open, leaning forward in your seat.
You hear Jun groan from the driverâs seat, and both you and Minghao shoot him a dirty look. âI forgot both of you are obsessed with Radiohead. Seriously, could either of you get more emo?â
âIf you werenât driving right now, Iâd strangle you,â Minghao says bluntly before looking back at you. âAnyways, whatâs your favorite song?â
âJunnie, please, can you put on Creep now? You know Iâve been waiting forever,â you plead, holding your hand out to the microphone thatâs in your brotherâs hand. The room is dark and lit up with red and blue LEDs across the border, making the room glow purple.
âBut I want to sing another round of Taylor Swift!â he protests, pointing at the big screen in front of you while clutching the microphone close to his chest. You scoff, poking his side. âYou know Iâm not ticklish, so that doesnât work.â
âYouâre not ticklish? How?â Yiren exclaims, looking at Jun with wide eyes.
You turn to squint at her. âHeâs weird. I thought we already established this.â
âHey!â Jun whines. âSee this is why you wonât be getting to sing Creep tonight.â
âJun!â you cry out, and youâre about to pull out a string of complaints and curses, but then Minghao is stepping in, pointing at you.
âPut on Creep. Sheâs been asking for a while and I want to sing it too,â he says. Jun is quiet for a moment before sighing and handing you the microphone which leads you to puffing up your chest and smiling proudly.
âThanks,â you chirp gleefully, as Minghao holds his own microphone up to his lips.
When he smiles at you, itâs kind and sincere in such a way that it has your heart swelling under your pretty pink jacket. Minghao coolly points at Yiren who sits by the control tablet. âCreep. Hit it.â
The air inside your house is warm as you skip down the hall and down the stairs. When the bell rang the first time, you thought it was just some package but when you hear it ring twice, you think otherwise.
When you peek through the little peep-hole, you jump up and down on the balls of your feet, a mix of excitement and nerves pools at your stomach. You open the door and Minghao shuffles in front of you at the doorstep. You havenât seen him in a few weeks, and his hair looks shorter. âDid you cut your hair?â you ask the seventeen year old as you move to the side so he can step in.
âYeah, it was getting in my eyes too much,â he tells you with a nod, a small puff of vapor coming from his lips. Itâs cold, and you hear him inhale a breath of relief when you close the door behind him. âThought the door was never gonna open. I was freezing my ass off,â he says, unwinding the brown scarf from his neck.
ââm sorry,â you reply sheepishly as he takes off his shoes, following you through the foyer. âJun didnât tell me you were coming so I was in my room. Heâs still out with my dad, but heâll be back soon.â
âThatâs fine.â Minghao shrugs off his puffer jacket, placing it on the coat rack while you make your way to the kitchen.
âDo you want a drink? Itâs cold outside, so I can make some hot chocolate. Jun got the nice kind from the cafe down the street.â
âThatâd be great, thanks,â he says, sitting down at one of the stools in front of the kitchen island as you take out some milk and hot chocolate powder. Itâs silent, and you chew your lip while thinking about how this is the first time in a really long time that you and Minghao have been alone together.
Nearing the end of his twelfth year in high school and just like the first time you met him, heâs as enticing as ever. Dancing competitions with Jun, left and right, smart and respectful with the teachers, popular among the studentsâyou're lucky you get to talk to someone as cool as him, even if it is only on the account that youâre his best friendâs little sister.
âHowâs high school?â he asks casually as you boil some milk over the stove.
âItâs alright ⊠English is still hard as ever,â you admit, dropping the powder into the frothing milk.
Minghao chuckles softly when you turn around to face him, and a small smile makes its way onto your lips. âYeah, it was never my strong suit either. You still friends with ⊠whatâs her name? Sorry, Iâm not good with namesâthe girl who lost her voice at karaoke when she came with us?â
âYiren?â you giggle softly, recalling the memory. âYeah. Still friends, still as loud as ever,â you say with a sigh, mixing the milk as it turns light brown. âHow are things with you? Junâs been telling me the dance practices you guys have is pretty intense. He always looks like he could eat a horse when he comes home.â
âThatâs good to hear, and yeah, itâs all going good. It is pretty tiring, but itâs a lot of fun,â Minghao replies, stretching his arms behind his back as you pour out the hot chocolate into two mugs, bringing it over. âThanks,â he murmurs, grabbing from your hand sitting down at your regular spot, one extra chair seated between the two of you as always.
Armâs length, you think for a moment, before shaking yourself of the thought. âIâm sure the practice is paying off thoughâseems like Jun is always talking about some new kinda competition or something.â
âMhm,â Minghao hums, taking a sip of the hot cacao. âThis is really good, thank you,â he says with a soft smile, and youâd be lying if you said you didnât feel some sort of giddiness erupt in your stomach. âI think ⊠I think we can really take it somewhereâour dancing.â
Itâs a sparing thought that Minghao and Junâs dreams are far beyond yours, and you have a bit of a difficult time trying to understand what he means by somewhere and if that somewhere includes you or not.
âYouâre going to Korea?â your eyebrows furrow as you glance between Jun and your parents.
âNothingâs finalized yetââ your mother says, but when Junâs eyes flicker between you and the ground, you already know that this is set in stone.
âYes it is.â Your voice is small when the words come out. âYouââ you take a deep breath, ââyouâre going.â
âNot now, of course,â your dad says, patting your back as he stands up, your mother following suit. âTalk for a few minutes, yeah?â he says as both your parents walk out. When your whole family walked into your room ten minutes earlier to tell you they had big news, you werenât sure what you were expecting, but it certainly was not this.
And now youâre sitting with your brother on one end of your bed while youâre curled up against your pillows on the other, unable to meet his gaze.
âWhen are you going?â you ask quietly, finally breaking the silence.
âAugust.â
âThatâs in a month and a half,â your shoulders deflate as you say it. âHow long?â
âI donât know. Iâm sorry.â You bury your face in your hands in hopes that itâll muffle your cries. It doesnât.
Jun scoots over to you quickly when he sees your shoulders shake, one arm going around your back to pull you close to his body, but you still canât bring yourself to look at him. âHow are you going to do it?â you blubber as your brother pats your back. âYou canât just go to a whole different country alone andââ
âI wonât be alone. Minghao is coming with me,â Jun tells you quickly. Now that brings your head up. You donât care that your nose is snotty and that your hair is all over the place and that your face burns, you just need to see the look on Junâs face to see that he isnât messing with you.
The way his own eyes are glossy gives you your answer. âY-you both got accepted into tha-that company?â
Jun nods. âWe applied together.â
âWhy didnât you tell me you were applying? I-I wouldâve understood. You could have given me more time to process this andââ You look down at your hands, âFuck,â you mutter to yourself, not finding the words in your throat.
âWe didnât even know if we would get accepted. Me and Minghao promised each other that weâd only follow through with it if both of us got in and we didnât think that thereâd be a high chance of that because itâs so competitive ⊠I only told Mom and Dad because until we got the acceptances, I really didnât think it was going to actually happen.â You gulp at his words, trying to let it all sink in.
âI think ⊠I think I just need to go on a walk. Take a breather, yâknow,â you mutter under your breath as you stand up. Just as you're about to walk away, you stop yourself, looking back at Jun who stares down at his hands. You donât think twice before wrapping your arms around his shoulders and hugging him tightly. âIâm really proud of you,â you say quietly before rushing out of your room and down the stairs.
You shove your feet into some slippers in the foyer, rushing out onto the street soon after. You arenât sure what youâre doing or where youâre headed, but you continue to trudge along the sidewalk until youâre walking down the main road.
The summer air is hot and stuffy, and you wonder if you feel so suffocated because of the sunâs onslaught or because of thoughts that run through your head. Itâs surrounding you, breathing it in, it fills your lungs, courses through your veins, rushes to your brainâyou donât know what it is, but itâs uncomfortable and has you dizzy and your vision foggy.
You lean against a thick lamppost next to you, hands on your knees as you knit your eyebrows together as sweat beads down your forehead. What the fuck, you think as you breathe in through your nose.
You hear your own name bounce around in your head, and the sound only grows louder and louder until youâre muttering under your breath, telling yourself to shut the fuck up, shut the fuck up, shut the fuck up. And there are tears in your eyes but you furiously wipe them away because while you donât mind crying, you do mind crying if you donât know why.
And fuck, thereâs that voice again, your name echoing over and over again until itâs growing lowder and ringing in your ears. You think you might start crying again until the voice sounds familiar and youâre whipping your head up and standing straight when you see a car pull up to the curb next to you.
âFuck my life,â you mumble to yourself when you see Minghao in the driverâs seat of the car. He rolls down the window and god, he looks so pretty with his hair back and upper body fit into a loose yellow shirt.
âHey, what are you doing?â he asks you, brows pinched into a concerned expression as he looks at you, face flushed and sheen from sweat.
âIââ Youâre about to smile at him and let the giddiness of having your crush talk to you take over, but then the words get caught in your throat when you remember the whole reason youâre out here. ââIâm just going on a walk.â
âIn this heat?â He raises a brow at you. âWhere to? Let me give you a ride. You donât look too well.â
âNowhere really,â you say with a shrug. âActually, I might just head back home,â you rush out, turning on your heel to walk in the other direction so Minghao canât pry any further, but he stops you.
âWait, wait, wait,â he calls out, and you donât have the willpower to ignore him. âLet me drive you home then. Seriously, you donât look wellâlike you look like youâre âbout to pass out and shitâso just get in the car, please?â He says the last part with some sort of beggary etched onto his face and you just canât deny him. Not now, not ever.
Pulling the door open, your limbs feel heavy as you climb into the car, air much cooler and fresher than outside. Leaning your head against the headrest, you let your eyes flutter shut as Minghao starts the car.
âAre you seriously okay? You lookââ
âSick, I know. I look sick,â your grumble, eyes still shut. You wonder if you should tell him Jun just told you everything.
âIâm sorry,â and you can tell from the way his voice doesnât waver that he means it.
âJun told me about Korea.â
âOh.â Yeah, very big oh. âJust now?â You nod. âIs that why you were out here?â You nod again, finally opening your eyes.
âHey, this isnât the way to my house.â
Minghao keeps his eyes on the road. âCâmon, letâs get some pop,â he says, ignoring your statement and driving into the parking lot of a convenience store. He unbuckles his seatbelt and hops out his end, not saying a word, and you figure that you have no other choice but to follow.
Any other situation and youâd be grinning about spending some time alone with Minghao, but after hearing Jun tell you that heâs going to be traveling hundreds of miles and flying over borders within the next two months has your stomach churning in a way you donât like.
You donât know if you want to spend all the hours of the day with Jun and Minghao, or if you want to crawl up in your bed and pretend they donât exist so itâll hurt less when theyâre gone. You feel stupid for thinking like thisâyou know itâs going to hurt either way.
Youâre lost in your own thoughts as you walk into the store after Minghao, only snapped back into the present when he says something to you. âHey, those are your jeans that you wore when we first did karaoke right?â
You blink once and then twice before looking down at your pants. They were those same jeans. âYeah, howâd you know?â you ask him incredulously, and Minghao chuckles as he reaches into the cooler and pulls out a pink popsicle.
âI remember the flowers and how they matched your pink jacket. It was cute,â he says casually, and you hope he doesnât catch onto the way your fingers twiddle together nervously and you avert your gaze. âAnyways, you like Cola right?â he clarifies when reaching into the drink fridge near the cooler. You nod shyly, thanking him quietly when he hands you a can.
As you make your way to the cash register, you fish around in your pockets for a few moments hoping youâll dig up a dollar bill or something but then Minghaoâs hand is on your wrist and he shakes his head with a smile.
âDonât worry about it, Iâll cover it.â He turns back so quickly you donât have time to protest because heâs already sticking his card into the machine, throwing the cashier a thumbs up and walking out the store without a word.
âI couldâve paid for myself, yâknow,â you grumble, following behind Minghao, watching to see where heâs headed. You think heâs going to get back into his car, but instead he plops down on the street curb, sitting on the ground. You just look at him for a few moments, contemplating what to do for a few moments before joining his side.
âYeah, but I wanted to pay for it.â
The sun is bright and it beads down on you relentlessly, but you donât complain. You both sit in silence as you both tend to your snacksâMinghao tries to lap up his popsicle quickly now that youâre out in the heat and you try to drink as much of your Cola as you can before it grows lukewarm. The air grows thick between you.
You canât find the right words to say. You suppose there arenât any right words or any wrong words, and that you can say just about anything right now and it wouldnât matter.
Glancing at Minghao who takes a lick of his pink popsicle, you feel that uneasy feeling swarm inside of your chest.
You could kiss him right now. You could press your mouth against his sticky lips and lap at the sugar against his tongue. You could hold his face and run your fingers through his hair and cradle the nape of his neck. You could do anything right now and it wouldnât matter.
Minghao, after all, was leaving.
But youâre scared and Minghao is mature and his dreams are big and heâs brave.
Your eyes linger on his plush lips for no longer than a second before you shamefully look down at the Cola in your hands, suddenly feeling sick to your stomach.
âYouâll remember this place, right? Likeâif you get big and famous and stuff, you two wonât forget, right?â you resort to asking. You say âthis place,â but really, you mean âme.â You donât want to be forgotten.
Minghao watches you with his eyes clouded with something you canât really make out. âOf course we wonât. Weâll remember forever.â Absentmindedly, you trace figure-eights into the top of your can of pop, and Minghao catches the motion.
Using his own finger, he traces the figure of the number eight over the cement of the curb. âSee. Like infinity, yâknow?â
You purse your lips together and nod, your mind going dizzy. âCan we ⊠can we go?â you mumble softly, gripping the can in your hand. âI think the heat kinda got to me.â Itâs not entirely a lie.
Minghao doesnât question you, polishing off his popsicle and tossing it into the trash before unlocking the door so you can take the silent ride home.
Jun and Minghao flew out two months ago. You went with your family and Minghaoâs family to bid goodbyes. Itâs not like you wouldnât see them againâgive or take a few months and Jun would be back at home, but heâd have to leave again. And again. And again.
Itâs sad, you think, as you slump against Yiren on some random personâs couch. You miss them so much, but when you think about Jun and Minghao, all you can see is the hard work theyâve put into going where theyâre headed.
You feel selfish as you bring a cup up to your lips. You feel pathetic and lame and if you werenât already drunk, youâd be wallowing in self pity as well. The alcohol tastes just as bitter as your feelings, and while you wince when you gulp it down, you donât hesitate to let some more run down your throat.
Yiren watches you worriedly when you clutch her arm and shut your eyes tight. âI miss them,â you whisper, and she doesnât know if youâre talking to her or to yourself. She strokes your hair and coos to you about taking you to lie down somewhere.
Your head spins as she helps you stand, letting the cup fall to the ground, not bothering to pick it up. Yiren pulls you into an empty bedroom and sits you on the bed. âDrink this,â she instructs, handing you a bottle of water.
âYiren, I miss them,â you repeat yourself.
âI know, I know you do. Do you want to go home? Iâll drive you andââ
âNo, you go have fun. I just need to sit down for a sec,â you tell her, letting your back fall onto the mattress. Yiren gives you a warning look, but you shoo her off. âTrust me, Iâll be fine. Iâll call you if I need anything.â She looks like she wants to protest, but you both know youâre on a one track mind right now.
âPlease donât do anything stupid,â Yiren begs as she walks away and closes the door behind her. Youâre still dizzy, but not nearly as bad as before. Sitting up, you glance around the room. Itâs simpleâprobably a guest room in whoeverâs house this is. Also probably why the door was unlocked in the first place.
You feel you might pass out until your eyes land on an open notebook on a table in the corner of the room. You donât think twice before standing up and ripping a sheet out, scrambling for a pen.
DEAR MINGHAO
Iâm drunk right now. I miss you and I miss Jun. I hope when you guys come back again, we can go to that karaoke place again and sing to Radiohead. Iâve expanded my taste you knowâmy favorite song is Fake Plastic Trees now, and I even got a record player just so I could play the vinyl for it. Sorry I didnât tell you earlier.
When you come back, we should really go there again. Yirenâs been getting really tired of me singing Creep every time, so I need a new duo partner. And sheâs leaving too, so thereâs that.
I really want to kiss you right now, but youâre in Korea.
I miss Jun a lot too. I think I hate you for it. Heâs my brother but somehow you get to see him more and talk to him more and be with him more. Sometimes I call him and itâs for less than five minutes and I hear your voice in the background and I donât know if I want to listen to you speak forever or strangle you so you can never talk again. I get that Jun is busy, and that youâre busy, but you guys get to be busy together.
Yiren told me sheâs probably going to go to college out of the country next year. Iâm going to miss her like hell. I think I already miss her, and so I drag her to karaoke with me so she wonât ever forget about me and Radiohead and how garbage I am at singing Creep.
Jun says heâs going to come visit home in two months, and that you might come along. I didnât know home was a place you only visit, but I guess being an idol changes you. I probably sound super bitter right now. Iâm not. Maybe Iâm upset that you guys are gone, but I really am happy for you.Jun is happy, and youâre happy, and Iâm so happy you have each other.
Itâs hard to focus on your examâhalfway through your degree and you still get the jitters every time you step into the testing hall. Itâs probably the nerves. And the caffeine. And the fact that youâll be seeing your brother and Minghao in three hours.
Itâs mainly the third that has your leg bouncing up and down on the balls of your feet as you jot down your answers. The exam takes longer than youâd like to finish, but as soon as youâve finished the final question, youâre bolting out of the large room and toward the parking lot.
Connecting your phone to your car, you call Jun as you back out of the parking spot. âHey, you guys at the airport?â you ask when you hear him pick up.
âYeah, weâre just getting out right now but thereâs kind of a crowd so it might take a while to just get to the car.â
âI forgot you guys are, like, famous,â you mutter jokingly. âWhereâre you headed first? Minghaoâs place first?â
âYeah probably. Heâs gonna see his parents and stuff first and then Iâll go to Mom and Dadâs house, so you can just come there.â
âOkay ⊠weâre still good for our dinner plans, right?â
âYeah, actually I was wondering if Minghao could tag along,â Jun says, and you can hear some muffled shouting from the other side.
âOh okay, yeah suââ
âHey, look, thereâs a lot of people here and I canât hear much so just text me your response and Iâll get to you in a second,â Jun tells you quickly as the shouting grows louder. He hangs up soon after and you sigh heavily as you start driving to your parents house.
The ride is quiet but youâre happy to be met with gleeful parents when you get to their place. Youâre all a bit spirited at the prospect of Jun coming home, so when you hear the old ringing of the door bell, youâre bolting to the door and swinging it open, jumping into his arms.
âWhat happened to âhi,â âhello,â âhow are you?ââ Jun teases as he hugs you close, awkwardly trying to shuffle into the house. You poke your tongue out at him when you finally unwind your arms from around him.
âHi. Hello. How are you? You seem obnoxious, as always,â you shoot back, and Jun only grins, pinching your cheek tightly.
âOh how I missed my little insane sister,â he says before moving onto your parents, enveloping them in hugs as you all begin to settle down in the living room. The four of you spend a few hours catching up with Jun before he excuses himself to freshen up so he can get ready for your plans for the evening.
When he comes back all ready, youâre pulling out your keys from your purse and waving bye to your parents, promising them youâll stop by the next morning as you and your brother make your way to the door.
âSee you later!â Jun calls out before closing the front door behind him and following you to your car. Minghaoâs house is close by, no more than a five minute drive, and itâs quiet as you take the familiar roads through the town to get there.
âShould we go in?â you ask when you park in Minghaoâs driveway. âYou havenât seen his parents in a while, have you?â
âOh yeah, youâre right. Câmon, letâs go.â You both slip out of the car and make your way to the front door. Minghaoâs mother opens the door and you spend a few minutes exchanging greetings and catching up before Minghao is stepping out, clad in some black jeans and a grey hoodie.
He smiles when he sees you, pulling you into a hug, giving you a chance to feel the slightly damp hair against your cheek and the woody smell that always reminds you of him. âHey, howâs it been?â he asks when he pulls away.
âI-Iâm good,â you say shyly.
âLetâs talk more in the car, yeah?â Jun suggests, turning back to Minghaoâs parents to give them a hug before you all wave your goodbyes and get into your car.
âWhereâre we headed?â Jun asks, as you back out of the driveway. Jun sits in the passenger seat while Minghao slips into the back.
âItâs this new placeâopened just a few months ago so I doubt youâd have gone there yet,â you tell him as you start driving.
âIs it the place next to the cafe?â Minghao asks you, and you nod excitedly.
âYeah ⊠howâd you know?â
âMy mom told me about it, and said I should try it out. I guess nowâs my chance, huh.â
âYeah! Itâs really good, I hope you both like it,â you say, reaching over to the AUX controls to flick on one of your playlists. âOkay guys ⊠are you ready?â you warn, watching Minghaoâs eyes brighten through the mirror.
âOh my god, donât tell me you guys are going to sign Creep againââ Jun starts to groan, but you reach over and press a finger over his lips to shut him up.
âQuiet,â Minghao hisses to his friend, scooting forward in his seat so youâre in his view, placing his hands under your headrest. His fingers brush against the back of your neck and youâre scared you might crash the car from the way his touch makes you shiver. Fuck, more than half a damn decade and you still canât fight it off. âTurn it up,â he instructs from behind, and you can only grin as you reach over and pump up the volume.
The deep rumble of snare and guitar echoes through the car as the song starts and you already feel your heart begin to swell in your chest. So when the first lines of, âwhen you were here before,â leave your lips, you arenât sure if you feel your heart mending itself, or if itâs salt being poured on the wound.
Because from behind you is Minghaoâs voice, so deep and velvety and angelic it has you almost in a trance. Heâs been good at singing, always, but now his voice sounds ⊠mature, and developed and ⊠and you love it.
You think back to the first time you sang Creep with him, and the lyrics already have you reminiscing when you both sing, âcouldnât look you in the eye,â because goddammit you still struggle to look at Minghao for too long because youâre scared youâll get lost.
And when it gets to the part before the bass is blaring in your ears, Minghao and you are singing, âI wish I was special, youâre so fuckinâ special,â at the top of your lungs and you canât help but let the irony sink in.
Now youâre pretty sure when Thom wrote Creep, he didnât mean it to be about your love life, especially not the non-existent one between you and your brotherâs best friend, but Thom is speaking to you right now, and you wonder if Minghao can hear the way youâre singing from your heart. How youâre singing for him.
When the song comes to an end, Minghaoâs fingers brush over the nape of your neck one last time before he retreats back into his seat. You try to not mull on the feeling any longer, shaking your head of all of those thoughts when you near the restaurant.
âHere it is!â you chirp, parking the car on the curb. The three of you shuffle out of the car casually, making your way to the entrance.
âLooks nice,â Minghao comments as he opens the door for you and Jun. Your brother hops in merrily and you and Minghao both share a soft smile as you go inside too, your body nearly jerking when you feel his hand on the small of your back as he follows behind you.
His touch is warm and gentle andâfuck, does he know what heâs doing to you right now?
Youâre more relieved than anything when he finally lets his arm drop, the three of you making your way to the table you booked. You were scared that if Minghao stayed close any longer, heâd be able to feel your heart beating through your chest.
You guys sit down at the table, Jun next to you while Minghao settles across the two of you. âSo howâs your classes going?â he asks you as you look through the menu. âJun said you had an exam today, right?â
âYeah, it was my final one,â you tell him with a sigh of relief. âIt was stressful preparing for it but it went better than I thought.â
âGood to hear,â Minghao says as a waiter comes along to pick up on your orders. After he leaves, Jun turns to you.
âWhatâs Yiren up to?â Jun asks you curiously. âHavenât seen that girl in ages.â
âSheâs, uh, sheâs good,â you reply. âI havenât seen her in a while either ⊠she went off to college in Korea, remember?â
Minghao chuckles, âSeems like everyoneâs going there, huh? Maybe you should pull up too.â
You scrunch up your face and shake your head while you take a sip of water. âI think I like this place too much to leave. Plus, whoâs going to take care of our old folks if I leave too?â you tease, nudging your brother in the side.
âMom and Dad can take care of themselves just fine,â Jun shrugs, ruffling your hair as the waiter brings along some food.
âLooks good,â Minghao says, holding up some chopsticks as you all look down at the sizzling dishes in front of you.
âIt is! See?â you say pointedly, looking up at Jun. âImagine I moved to KoreaâI wouldnât be able to eat this.â Your brother only rolls his eyes and Minghao and you laugh together while you dig in.
As you work through your meal and catch each other up on your lives, Minghao eventually leans back in his seat and sighs heavily. âIâm really craving something sweet right now.â
âIâd say we should pick up some pastries from the cafe next door but they closed two hours ago,â you say sadly.
âOh shit, I forgot about that place. They made the best chocolate buns ever,â Jun mutters to himself, polishing off his plate.
âLetâs go to the cafe tomorrow evening, yeah?â Minghao suggests as he takes a sip of water. At the suggestion, you chew at your lip.
âUh, I donât think I can go then,â you say, hoping they wonât pry any further.
Of course, your brother doesnât allow you a second of peace. âWhy not? Your last exam was today, right?â
âYeah, but I have stuff to do,â you reply nonchalantly. Jun scoffs and tugs your ear, causing you to whine. âWhat was that for?!â
âYou didnât clear your schedule out for me? I thought you missed me! You know I have to leave in like a week,â he complains, and you and Minghao share an amused look as you nudge Jun on the side.
âRelax, you can have me in the morning and afternoon and everything ⊠I just have to go somewhere for the evening.â
âYouâre being really ominous about this, you know,â Jun retorts, crossing his arms over his chest. âWhereâre you going?â
You chew on your tongue, contemplating if this is the right moment to bring it up, or if you should even tell Jun and Minghao this at all. âI just have to see someone.â
âOh my god, shut up,â Jun groans. âYouâre literally asking me to pry. Tell me whoâa boyfriend?â You chuckle nervously, eyes flickering between Minghao and your brother, shaking your head.
âNoânot a boyfriend,â you say dryly, scoffing at the irony. âRemember Renjun? I told you about him when I was in freshman year.â
âVaguely. Remind me who he is again?â
âHeâs just a guy, and he has some of my stuff I need to pick up.â Both Minghao and Jun cock an eyebrow at you after that. âWhat?â you huff, leaning back in your seat.
âAn ex?â Minghao asks and your face burns.
âIâyeah,â you say casually. âAn ex.â
Jun frowns deeply. âI didnât know you and Renjun ever dated. I didnât even know you ever had a boyfriend,â he says, voice evidently upset that he was left out of this.
âIt wasnât that serious,â you pat his shoulder as to soften the blow. âPlus it happened when you were on tourâwe hardly talked then.â
âStill! You couldâve told me!â You bite back a, âBut could I really?â because this isnât the time or place for that.
âItâs whatever. I just need to pick up some stuff I left at his place andââ
âSo it ended pretty recently then?â Minghao piques, and your eyebrows furrow, slightly annoyed by both of their belated interest in your love life.
âWhat, no! Itâs been months andâwait, I donât see how thatâs any of your guysâ business,â you huff and Minghao backs off a little, but Jun still stays curiously leaning in.
âWhatever. Youâll be available to come with us to the lake on Friday though, right?â Jun asks, pulling out his phone and holding it up to your face to show you a picture of a lake house. âI booked a place to stay the night and all.â
âOf course Iâm going to comeâIâve been looking forward to it!â
âGood,â Jun says gruffly, still somewhat glaring at you.
You give him a funny look. âWhat?â
âIâm still mad you never told meâyouâre supposed to tell me this stuff! How else am I supposed to know that youâre doing fine on your own and actually growing up.â
âOh my god, Jun, Iâm an adult! Did you think I would never have boyfriends?â
âNo! At least not without telling me!â
You chuckle and Minghao follows in suit, enjoying the little sibling bicker. âOkay fine. Iâm sure Iâll be telling you every detail of my love life when it gets resurrected.â
Minghao snorts at your use of words, and you revel in the way the sound makes you feel. Fuck it, itâs been more than half a decade and you still get butterfliesâyou canât fight away the feeling, so you might as well wallow in it.
You wonder what Jun would think about thisâyour love life being pulled and shaken by his own best friend. Oh well, some secrets are best kept hidden anyways.
âHereâs your stuff,â Renjun says softly, handing you a paper bag thatâs stuffed with a wide array of your belongings.
âThank you. Is my pink jacket in there? Iâve been looking for it for a while and I didnât know if I left it at yours,â you ask timidly, holding the paper bag close to your chest.
He scratches the back of his head as he steps back, nodding. âUh, yeah I think itâs at the bottom.â You peer down at the contents of your back, and give a half smile when you see the pink cloth peeking out from underneath.
âThanks for taking care of my stuff. I know youâve basically moved out and all.â
âNo worries. Do you, uh, need a ride home or anything? Itâs pretty cold.â
You purse your lips at the offer, but shake your head. âItâs fine âŠâ Thereâs an awkward silence and you quickly wonder if you should say anything more. Renjun looks awfully ⊠apologetic right now and you feel thereâs some more you can say. âHowâs your new place? Have you seen it?â
âYeah, I flew up there a few weeks back to get some of my main stuff shipped. A nice apartment, way bigger than whatever I had here,â he says with an awkward chuckle. You appreciate the effort.
Nodding, you tighten your grip on the bag. âThatâs good to hear. I hope it all goes well with you. I ⊠I think Iâll be taking my leave now. My brotherâs back in town so âŠâ
âOh yeah, I heard from Jianing. Hope youâre having a good timeâI know you havenât seen him in ages.â
âThank you. Anyways, Iâm gonna get going now. Thanks again,â you say as you step back, throwing out a small wave.
A half-hearted, âSee you,â leaves Renjunâs lips as you turn on your heel and start walking back to the bus station. Thereâs no promise of seeing Renjun later, or ever again, and something cold sinks in your stomach at the thought.
The thought that this all couldâve been avoided if Renjun hadnât gotten that stupid job offer hundreds of miles away. If he didnât decide to pack his bags and fly away just like Jun, like Yiren, like Minghao. Renjun was leaving, just like everyone else.
You clutch the paper bag close to your chest as you make your way to the bus stop, one hand fumbling in the pocket of your jacket as you search for your wallet and within seconds youâre a frantic mess. âShit,â you mutter under your breath. âShit, shit, shit!â you cry out when you drop your bag and pat frantically over your pockets to try and feel for your wallet.
Your digging into every crook of the coat and thereâs a growing feeling of dread that washes over you once you realize that you lost your fucking wallet. Hands clenched at your side, you feel hot tears well up in your lash line as you stare down at the ground, letting in the shitty events of today sink in.
You donât even know why youâre crying now. Itâs hardly even cries, really, youâre downright sobbing as you plop down on the curb of the empty street, fumbling with your phone as you pull up Junâs contact. Pressing the phone to your ear, you shut your eyes tight in an attempt to calm down your breath, but when you hear the line go dead you cry even harder, realizing that Jun is probably napping right now.
âFuck my life,â you complain to yourself, letting your head hang low as you scroll through your phone. You arenât even sure what compels you to click on him but before you know it youâre on speaker as you hear the buzzing of the phone as you wait for Minghao to pick up.
One ring. Maybe heâs busy.
Two rings. He might be looking for his phone.
Three rings. He probably wonât pick up.
Four rings, and youâre about to hang up but then it stops. âMinghao?â
Minghaoâs voice is cool and calm when he says your name. âDo youââ
âI need your help,â you say so quietly you arenât sure if heâll be able to hear it. And then Minghao hears it: your soft pants and shaky breath and something about the sound has him squeezing his phone tightly.
âAre you okay?â
âIâmââ No, I feel like shit and Iâm freezing my ass off and itâs so cold and I need you to help me. âCan you pick me up? I lost my wallet which has my bus card. Iâm sorry, I know itâs a little late and youâre probably busy butââ
âSend me your location.â
Minghao is pulling up in his black car within twenty minutes and by then youâve had enough time to wipe the tears from your face and piece together yourself to look presentable. Rolling down the windows as you wave over to his car, you hear the doors click and youâre roughly yanking on the door and throwing your stuff and yourself in.
Minghao raises a brow at your ruckus, asking once again, âAre you okay?â When you only sigh heavily, buckling yourself up, you hope Minghao will just leave it alone. Youâd rather not talk about the stupid breakdown you just had in front of your childhood crush.
Minghao clearly doesnât get the message, so when he starts the engine again, he murmurs, âHave you been crying?â You purse your lips together tightly as if the question itself as the tears bubbling up to the surface once again. âDid meeting with Renjun not go well?â Youâre surprised he remembers his nameâMinghao was never great with names. âCan you say something? Iâm worried.â
âSorry,â you say softly, letting your shoulder drop down, and from the corner of your vision you see Minghao watching you carefully. âI-I just got overwhelmed. And it was cold. Really cold. And thenââ You take a shaky breath. ââand I lost my fucking wallet on top of it and itâs all so shitty andââ
His hand is on your shoulder and you hardly realize that Minghao has pulled over and parked so he can turn to face you. Youâre crying again and you donât even know how this fucking happened, all you know is that thereâs so much going on in your head and Minghao is right there, heâs so close but then again, heâs so far.
âHey, hey calm down for a secâ,â he says calmly, gripping your arm firmly. âBreathe slowly, and tell me what happened.â
You inhale sharply through your nose and scrunch your face up as you bury your head in your hands. In your right mind, you wouldnât even think about telling Minghao about whatâs on your mind but itâs been a really terrible past hour and you canât control yourself.
âRenjunâs leaving. Didnât want to do long distance and so heâs gone andâfuck, I donât even blame him but whyâd he have to leave,â you ramble, tears streaming down your flushed cheeks as Minghao pats your back gently.
âDid he say something to you when you met with him?â he asked, tone laced with concern. âIâm sorry, Iâm justâare you oâokay please donât cry.â
You donât know why, but Minghao telling you to cry only makes the tears fall faster. âAnd Yirenââ you hiccup, âYiren left too, I havenât seen her in months and Jun a-a-and youâyouâve all been gone.â You donât realize when Minghao grabs both your shoulders and forces you to face him completely.
âSlow down, please. No oneâs left you, weâre all going to be here for you, you know that. Did Renjun say something which made you think like this?â he asks, the grip on your shaking shoulders growing tighter as you desperately try to steady yourself.
âN-no, but youâre not here. I hardly ever get to see my own brother and Yiren and you and Renjun and everything is so shitty I justââ you cry out and suddenly you stumble forward in the seat and before you know it Minghaoâs arms are around you.
Itâs not like you havenât hugged him before but this is the first time youâre blubbering into his shoulder about your feelings, and if you werenât so sad, youâd be fucking appalled. His warm hand is on your back, rubbing up and down slowly until youâve finally found the conscience to actually breathe and realize just whatâs going on.
Slowly, you pull away from Minghaoâs hold, furiously wiping away at your face to dry yourself, looking down at your lap bashfully. âI am so sorry, what the fuck, I-I donât know what came over me,â you blurt out when Minghao drops his hands from your shoulder. You miss the warmth, but youâre quite very embarrassed with yourself and donât have the will to chase after his touch.
âPlease donât apologize,â Minghao replies softly, watching you with wide eyes. âThat ⊠was a lot andââ
âIâm sorry, look, I was just having a shitty day and it all piled up and you justâI donât know I guess, letâs just pretend this never happened,â you beg with him. Minghaoâs face looks like he wants to say more, but you really canât tell with the way his eyes are clouded.
âAre you sure? You know you can talk to me.â
You gulp at the irony. No, you really canât. You canât tell Minghao anything, really, because even after crying and sobbing and wailing in his car he still looks at you with so much care and it has these stupid fucking butterflies erupting in your stomach like youâre fifiteen with a massive crush on your brotherâs best friend.
âCan you just please drive me to my place?â you ask, looking up at him with pleading eyes. âI think I just really need to sleep.â
You can tell Minghao still has questions, but you donât seem too willing to answer them so he doesnât say anything when he nods and turns back to the road. The ride is silent, and when he finally parks he pats your shoulder.
You look out the window and furrow your eyebrows. âThis isnât my apartment complex âŠâ you tell him, confused as you see a convenience store in front of you. The same one.
âCâmon, I know you love pop,â he says casually, unbuckling his seatbelt leaving you with no other choice to follow behind him. Thereâs an odd sense of deja vu that envelopes over you, shoving your pockets into your jacket shyly.
âRemember the last time we were here?â Minghao asks with a chuckle as you guys walk into the store.
âDonât remind me,â you murmur. âThat was a shitty day.â
Minghao gives you a nervous smile as he pulls out a can from the fridge and hands it to you, grabbing his own bottle as well. âYeah, but Cola made it better, right?â
âI guess it did. Cola always makes things better,â you admit. âHey, fuck you,â you say jokingly when Minghao pulls out his wallet. âYou shouldâve taken me here another time when I actually had my walletâI need to pay you back for that day!â you whine with a pout. âNow Iâm in debt to you twice! Youâve bought me two Colas!â
Minghao rolls his eyes playfully as he pays for the drinks. âYeah well things are different now, and Iâm pretty sure my wallet doesnât care about the cost of two Colas.â
âIs Mr. Big and Famous too good for my money now?â you huff when you step back outside, opening your Cola. âI will pay you back, no matter how stupidly rich you get.â
âIâll have to hold you to that,â Minghao laughs as you slip back into his car. The air is lighter as he drives you back to your place for real this time, and the lingering feeling of pop on your tongue is sweet and fun.
âThank you for the ride. And the Cola,â you add when heâs in front of your building.
âYou remember what I said?â
You nod as you step out of the car, picking up your brown bag. âThank you so much for this. Iâm sorry again.â
âStop apologizing. Is there ⊠is there anything else I can do? You want another Cola perhaps?â
âVery funny, but I donât think I want to be jumping off the walls tonight âŠâ you answer, closing the door but still peering through the open window. You think for a second as you chew your lip, nodding when you come up with something. âBut do me a favor ⊠donât tell Jun.â
Jun takes you out to the lake house he booked three mornings after you met with Renjun and sobbed to Minghao in his car. Itâs a refreshing turn of events, if youâre being honest, and youâre eager to sink into a relaxing weekend after a stressful exam season.
Your brother drives the three hours on the way with the promise of you driving on the way home hung over your head. When you reach the houseâa medium sized cabin perched right by the lake and surrounded by trees and mountainsâyouâre greeted with the sight of Minghao sitting in his car and scrolling on his phone.
As you and Jun pile out of the car and grab your bags, Minghao comes out too, walking toward you with his hands stuffed in his pockets. âThought you guys would never come. If you were gonna be late you shouldâve just given me the keys to this place,â he says with a huff.
âDonât blame me,â Jun shrugs, locking the car after youâve both taken out your stuff, walking up to the cabinâs entrance. âSheâs the one who wanted to stop and buy some pop.â
âDonât act like you didnât want it either,â you retort, reaching into your tote bag to hand Minghao a can of Cola. âHere,â you offer with a smile which he returns gleefully.
âOkay actually, totally valid reason,â Minghao says, flicking open the can before taking a sip.
âHey! Donât be on her side,â Jun whines as he opens up the cabin. Minghao and you chuckle together, your heart warming at the sound as you three start to load your things into the house. Minghao doesnât say anything about that night when he picked you up, and for that much youâre grateful. This much, you can manage.
By the time you all have settled your things into your respective rooms itâs noon and the sun pummels down with admirable strength. As you stick your head out of your room, you catch Jun making his way down the hallway toward the bathroom.
âYou going for a swim?â you ask, gesturing down to your swimsuit that youâve already eagerly put on.
âNah, Iâm gonna go later. I need to take a call right now,â he says with a sigh and you nod, about to retreat back to your room before Minghao walks out of his own room.
âIâll go if youâre going,â Minghao tells you casually, and you donât waste a second to nod. âGive me five so I can get changed and then we can go out.â
You jump down the hall excitedly after he closes the door behind him, making your way to the backyard porch which leads into a deck over the lake. As you place your towel on one of the chairs outside, you hear the sliding door open.
Minghao walks out shirtless, lower half only covered with his swim trunks as he runs a hand through his shaggy hair, shaking his head lightly as he makes his way towards you, placing his towel next to yours. âThanks for waiting ⊠shit, itâs hot as hell,â he murmurs, and youâre thankful that youâre facing away from him right nowâyou arenât sure youâd be able to handle the proximity and the sight of his bare upper body.
âYeah,â you agree, finally straightening your back and putting some distance between the two of you when you start walking towards the edge of the deck. âThe waterâs so clear,â you think out loud, looking down at the blue lake in front of you.
âItâs really pretty ⊠you want a picture?â Minghao suggests, walking up behind you.
âI would, but I left my phone inside.â
âLetâs just take it on my phone,â he says casually, holding up his phone in front of you, waving at you to step back a little so he can take a picture. âA candid one would look pretty with this viewâlike youâre looking out at the lake and stuff,â he begins to say, placing a smooth hand on your shoulder so he can manually turn you around so that youâre facing away from him.
When he lets his hand drop, it brushes over the curve of your hip and you have to bite down on your lip to stop the pathetic whimper that threatens to escape your lips. Luckily, Minghao canât see the pained expression that makes its way onto your face as he steps back holding up his phone.
âOkay ready âŠâ he calls out from further behind. âThree ⊠two ⊠one!â You hear a faint tapping sound as you still, letting Minghao take the pictures as you wait patiently. It takes a few moments, and youâre about to ask him how much longer heâs going to go at it before you hear the sound of something being dropped, and then a few rattling thuds.
âMinghao, whatââ you begin to question as you slowly turn on your heel but by then itâs too late. âWHAT THE Fââ
Your scream is cut off short when Minghao runs forward and lunges at you, one arm wrapping itself around your waist as he jumps into the water, bringing you down with him. The cool water of the lake hits your body and the wind gets punched out of your lungs as you feel your limbs entangle with his. Instinctevely, your arms tighten around one of his as your eyes press closed tightly as you feel your warm body start to level with the temperature around you.
And so even as your legs kick around for a few panicked moments, you begin to feel oddly at peace when your head finally reaches the surface of the water, Minghaoâs hand still steady over your hips as you gasp for air.
âYouâre a bitch for that,â you say, a few choked giggles escaping your lips as you do. Minghao finally unwinds his arm from yours, and while you miss the contact, his body is still dangerously close to yours, and you figure that that is already more than you can manage.
Minghao smiles gleefully, pushing his face so close that itâs right up in front of you. âMm maybe, but it was really funny. Got it on video too.â
âWhat?!â you screech, swimming backward so quickly that you hit your head on the wooden platform of the deck. âCrap!â you exclaim, hand immediately flying up to press against the throbbing crown of your head. Minghaoâs eyes widen with concern as he wades his way towards you, tall enough to still have his feet touch the lake bottom unlike you.
âShit, Iâm sorry, are you okay?â he asks worriedly, his own hand coming up to feel the back of your head. His eyes are big and brown as he looks down at you, and for this moment, you forget about the dull ache and bask in the way the sun hits his skin so perfectly he glows.
âIâm fine!â you squeak quickly, letting your hand drop so you can tread in the water lightly, slowly moving a safe distance away from the deck.
âA-are you sure?â he probes, making his way to you, and you have a moment to admire him from afarâthe way his hair is matted against his forehead and water drops gather at his lashes, making his eyes look prettier than ever.
You chuckle at the way his lips are pursed together apologetically, and you splash some water at him to lighten the mood. âYes, Minghao, Iâm great. I hardly hit myself.â Minghaoâs face looks uneasy, and you laugh again.
It takes a few more minutes of you trying to convince him that youâre totally fine before he finally lets it go. Eventually, you find yourself on a big inflated duck-shaped floaty, laying down with your face up and eyes closed. You lose track of time, enjoying the white noise of Minghao splashing around in the water around you, drifting off into a hazy state until you hear a loud yell and feel yourself being flipped over and off your floaty.
âJun!â you whine, rubbing your eyes as you furiously push hair off your face when you resurface, glaring at both Jun and Minghao laugh side by side. âYou guys have to stop doing this to me,â you groan, eyes finally adjusting to its normal state.
âWhat are you talking about?â Jun asks innocently as you make your way over to the two of them, not bothering to turn your duck floatie back up right. âIt was just an accident I fell on youâhey!â he yells out when you lunge at him. Minghao steps back quickly as you and Jun waddle and fight in the water, splashing water at each other while you try and get your revenge.
âOkay! Okay! Iâm sorry,â Jun admits with a pout. âYou didnât do this to Minghao after he dunked you in the water,â he complains as you release him.
You narrow your eyes. âHow do you know about that?â
âHe sent me the video.â
âMinghao!â you exclaim, turning to the boy who is now treading around a meter in front of you. He only shrugs and grins cheekily.
âIt was really funny,â Jun tells you with a laugh. âI might just post it on my story.â
âOh my god, donât you dare.â
Jun only shakes his head and starts slowly swimming further into the lake. âDonât worryâI wouldnât do that. Minghao canât have any dating rumors, now can he?â
You chew on your lip, not responding. Minghao doesnât say anything either, only chuckling along with your brother as he follows after him. You arenât sure what to say to that, and the comment leaves some uneasy feeling hanging in your stomach.
Fuck, maybe you did hit your head hard.
You three spend a good few hours out in the lake until itâs evening. Itâs a slow day and you start to realize just how much you missed spending time with your brother and Minghao like thisâit isnât often they get the opportunity to do things like this, so youâre grateful that they decided to share some of their few days of peace with you.
The second day is even hotter than the first, and you wake from your sleep early in the morning when the sky is still blooming with purple and orange hues. Crawling out from your bed, you make your way downstairs. If it was just you and your brother, you wouldnât be so mindful about keeping your noise levels down because god knows that Jun can sleep through just about anything, but, Minghao is with you guys now, and youâd hate to sour his experience even just a little by accidentally waking him up for being too loud.
So you can imagine your surprise when you walk into the kitchen to see Minghao already leaning against the counter as he scrolls through his phone. He hasnât noticed you and you contemplate leaving it like that for a few moments.
Heâs wearing a tight fit, black, sleeveless top that shows off the curve of his shoulders and lets the sparkle of his silver chain glint under the morning light. Minghao is attractiveâyou and the millions of people in his comments know thatâand you feel an odd sense of pride well up in your stomach that youâre one of the few people who get to see him like this.
With his hair messy and brushing over his eyes, legs crossed over each other as he presses his body weight against the kitchen island, bare skin glowing from the natural light, heâs beautiful.
Your face heats up when you realize youâve just been staring at him, so you quickly clear your throat. âGood morning,â you chirp, walking into the kitchen so he can finally see you.
Minghao looks up from his phone, tucking it into the pocket of his sweatpants to greet you with a smile. âHey, I didnât know you were up. Howâs your head doing?â he asks shyly, walking over to casually run his hand over that same spot on the crown of your head.
Itâs an oddly intimate gesture, and if you didnât know any better, your heart might have given out from the way he was touching you. Still, you know heâs just checking to see if itâs swollen, but your heart flutters anyways.
âI-itâs fine,â you reply, opening the fridge to pull out some orange juice as his hand drops. âI didnât know you were an early riser. Jun always sleeps in whenever he gets the chance.â
âYeah, well thatâs why heâs paged as a literal cat by everyone,â Minghao says with a chuckle as you place a jug on the counter. âDo you want some tea? Iâm just boiling the water now so I can add some more if you want.â
âSure, thatâll be nice.â You pour yourself some orange juice. âDo you want to eat something? I brought some cupcakes to have for breakfast,â you offer, reaching into one of the bags you didnât unpack to pull out a box.
âAre they those cupcakes?â
âYupâthe one and only!â you exclaim, opening the lid to show him. Minghao grins, pulling two out.
âGod, I missed these. Yâknow, Jun actually gave your recipe to Mingyu too, but he just doesnât make them the same,â Minghao tells you, and your eyes light up.
âReally? Poor Mingyu,â you say with a sigh.
âIf you ever end up visiting us in Korea, you should really make some,â Minghao suggests as he goes to take care of the boiling water, dropping some tea leaves into it before moving the water into a pot. Then, pulling out two small cups and plates, he says, âMe and Jun have told the others about how good you make them, but they really need to try them.â
âIâd love to,â you say with a grin, giddy with the way Minghao is boosting your ego. As he pours out the tea into two mugs, you put the cupcakes on the small plates, looking out to the glass sliding door which leads to the porch by the lake. âYou want to eat outside? The sky looks really beautiful now, and the weather looks like itâs nice too.â
Minghao nods, holding up the two mugs while you grab the plates and follow him outside and onto the little shaded porch where you sit by two of the chairs and the small, knee level coffee table. The sky is still deep in its changing colors, and you pull out your phone to take some pictures.
âCan you take some pictures of me? For my WeVerse and Instagram and stuff?â he asks when youâre done, holding out his phone in your direction.
âYeah, of course.â Leaning back after you grab his phone, you position yourself as Minghao poses. âLean back a little more so the background canâyeah, perfect âŠâ You take a few photos, and Minghao nods happily when you show him.
âCan you take some more candid ones?â
âSure, letâs switch spots. I think itâll look nicer if it looks like youâre looking out to the lake from here,â you suggest, getting up from your seat. Minghao complies without protest and you spend a few more minutes taking some pictures before finally handing him the phone. âYou like them?â
âHell yeah I do,â he says, looking through his phone. âYouâre great at this,â he compliments sincerely.
âIâm used to taking the kinda pictures you guys like now ⊠Jun has trained me well,â you joke, sitting back in the seat and reaching for your own cup of tea. Itâs quiet for a few moments as you both relax and watch the sky grow brighter by the minute.
Jun wakes up an hour later, trudging out his room with groggy eyes as you poke fun of him. The morning is slow for a short while after that before Minghao is reminding you all that you need to start heading back home. The two of them are leaving for Korea in two days, after all, and that leaves them with only today and tomorrow to completely bask in themselves and the rest of their family, so you pack your things and end your stay at the cabin before the clock hits noon.
That night, after you drive yourself and Jun home and you retreat to the comfort of your apartment, you flop down onto your couch and pull out your phone. Youâre met with a few notifications from WeVerse and Instagram, casually scrolling through the apps when your eyes catch a few familiar pictures.
Itâs on Instagram and you recognize the bright orange of the rising sky that sits behind Minghao who is smiling into the camera. The next picture is a candid one of him looking at the lake while he drinks some tea, and the third is a picture of the cupcake you made.
You grin at the pictureâthe rest of the world wonât know it, but you definitely doâitâs a little piece of you that Minghao is sharing with the world. Though, you arenât sure if he put as much thought into it as you are right now.
Brushing it off as Minghao just wanting to share a pretty picture of a nice looking cupcake, you purse your lips together only for them to be parted when you read his caption.
iâm a weirdo
Scrolling through the comments, you come across people saying, many among the following:
ur not a weirdo >:c fellow radiohead fanatic i see is the8 a certified creep? o: i didnât know minghao liked radiohead ⊠another reason to stan!
As you ignore the increased palpitating of your heart at the idea that Minghao quoted a line from, in your opinion, âyour guysâ song.â you sit and think for a moment about what to do. You consider just liking the post and scrolling past it before a funny thought crosses your mind, and so you start typing into the comments.
i wonder who took these pics lol
No oneâs going to see it. Minghao is definitely not going to see it, but you giggle to yourself anyways. Youâre about to put your phone down when you get a notification of a reply to your comment. Curious, you open it up, and see that itâs just a random person.
imagine itâs his gf
You laugh to yourself. You wish.
The last day or two with Jun goes as they always do when heâs hereâslow, but all that you need. He spends his time at your parents house and you stop by for lunch and dinner the day after you both return from the lake house.
The afternoon, you both went down to the cafe and stocked up on chocolate bunsâJunâs requestâand spent the rest of your time until evening going over your plans for the rest of the summer. You enjoy this part, always. Not Jun leavingâof course notâbut spending these tame moments with him.
It makes you wonder what things would have been like if he never left. Maybe heâd move out for university someplace else, but youâd get to see him more, probably. Get to hang out with him every weekend, instead of every two months.
You shake yourself off the thought as you drive to your parents house. Having Jun around more often would be nice, but there isnât any point in dreaming about the impossible.
As you pull up to the driveway and park your car, you notice Minghao standing out by the front door with his suitcase and a bag. âHey, looking for Jun?â
âWell, yeah. Of course I wanna say bye to you both before you go ⊠is the van here yet?â
âNah, itâs still taking some time but Jun is on the other side of the house to see if the car is gonna come from that side,â he explains.
âIâm gonna miss you guys ⊠you know when youâre both going to come next?â you ask, voice softer than you anticipated.
âI really donât knowâIâm sorry. You know how things are.â
âYeah,â you mumble, shoulders deflating as you look down at the ground..
âI knowâitâs not ⊠it's not easy for Jun, either, I can tell. It isnât easy for any of us to leave.â When Minghao finishes speaking you only nod, and as your eyes meet,you feel like thereâs something he wants to say. âHey,â he murmurs quietly.
A heavy hand is placed on your shoulder, and you feel you might as well sink to the ground and let the earth swallow you up. âIf youâre going to talk aboutââ
âHear me out, yeah?â Minghao cuts you off, and when you open your mouth in protest, he continues. âDonât âŠâ he inhales deeply before saying, âDonât take what Iâm about to say the wrong way, okay?â
You cross your arms over your chest. âThat really depends on what youâre going to say.â
âOkay, just ⊠just listen. Jun, and me, and Yiren, and Renjunââ God, why is he bringing this up? ââwe arenât trying to hurt you.â
âOf course I know that.â Your eyebrows knit together and Minghao sighs at your reaction, letting his hand fall from your shoulder. You miss the touch, but your mind is a little too preoccupied with trying to decipher Minghaoâs words to dwell on it.
âIâm just saying ⊠you shouldnât try to depend on anyone.â You open your mouth and then close it, trying to figure out how the hell he expects you to respond to this.
âWhat dâyou mean?â
âWell I mean,â he huffs before continuing, shoving his hands in his pockets, âyou obviously have been ⊠upset about people leaving you and you canât expect everyone to stick around forever.â
âIf youâre talking about Renjun, he was my boyfriend. I think itâs okay for me to expect someone who Iâm dating to âstick around,â even though it might not be forever.â
âI guess, but itâs not just Renjun, right? Jun ⊠Yiren ⊠me âŠâ he voice trails off.
âI basically spent my whole middle and high school years around you and Yiren, and Jun is literally my brother. Do you think me wanting the people I quite literally grew up around to be here for me is being âdependant?ââ
âI donât know what to tell you. I mean we were all going to grow up eventually? Look, donât take this the wrong way andââ
âExcuse me?â you blurt out harshly, taking a step back, scoffing before you continue. âI wouldnât be taking this the wrong way if you obviously didnât mean it the wrong way. You basically just said Iâm not independent.â
Minghao frowns at your reaction before responding, âI didnât say that. I just said you shouldnât depend on anyone.â
âWhich implies that I am depending on people unnecessarily!â
Minghao adjusts his backpack straps as he says, âI mean you did cry for quite a while about how people are leaving you. I just donât want you to get more hurt by being dependent on others.â
âThanks for the concern,â you shoot sarcastically, âbut Iâm not dependent on anyone. I was upset that night because all the people closest to me have moved away and if you ask any normal person, Iâm pretty sure theyâd agree that thatâs a valid reason to cry a little. So sorry if that was too much for you.â You say the last part with disgust laced on your tongue, and you watch Minghaoâs face grow increasingly sour as you go on.
âOkay, now youâre just twisting my words,â Minghao huffs, glancing around to make sure that no one is close by.
âWhat the hell Minghao,â you scoff, clenching your fists at your side. You donât want to be the person to jump down his throat, but you canât help but feel like youâre being talked down to. âWhyâwhy are you acting like Iâm still a little kid. Iâm more than Junâs little sister, you do know that right?â
âOh my god, seriously?â Minghao retorts, eyebrows rising in a mix of disbelief and irritation. âYou think thatâs what this is about? For fuckâs sake Iâm just looking out for you.â
âExactly!â you exclaim, pointing an accusing finger at him. âThereâs no reason for that! Like I said, Iâm not some little girl anymore and Iâve been looking out for myself for years. You just happened to catch me in a moment where I let myself be sad about it which, again, is a totally valid thing to be sad about.â
âI donât want to see you get hurt.â
âWell congratulations! You were unsuccessful,â you mumble out, feeling an ugly knot build up in your throat. âI trusted you,â you say softly, and Minghao looks at you with eyes so apologetic you almost think about forgiving him. âThat night after I saw RenjunâI-I trusted you,â you add more harshly this time. âAnd I cried to you even though we havenât properly spoken in fuck knows how long and you take all that and make me out to seem like some sort of defenseless kidââ
âCan you stopâyouâre putting words into my mouth. I never said you were defenseless or not independent or anything like thatâI donât even know why you think I would think of you like that because you know thatâs not true.â
âMinghao, I donât know if youâve realized but itâs been years since we've talked properly. Just becauseââ You take a deep breath before continuing your bitter words. ââjust because you get to live your stupidly amazing life with my brother by your side doesnât mean that you know me and that I know you, because clearly we donât know each other at all!â
âIâm sorry?â he says exasperatedly. âSorry I care about you or whatever, even though things have changed.â
You scowl, and in your right mind you wouldnât let your next words slip out of your mouth. âWell donât. Iâve been fine without your sympathy so far, Iâm pretty sure I can go on a bit longer.â
Minghao is about to respond, you can tell from the way his hands fiddle at his sides, but then thereâs a buzzing and you reach into your pocket to pull out your phone. âHey Jun,â you say, answering the call without meeting Minghaoâs gaze. â⊠Yeah, heâs with me, weâre just waiting for the car ⊠okay Iâll tell him.â
Tucking the device back into your pocket, you look at Minghao. âJun is asking for you on the other side of the house. You should go,â you say flatly and you can tell from the look on his face that he wants to say more, but holds back.
Grabbing his suitcase, he tears his eyes from you and doesnât look back after saying, âSee you,â walking away and around the corner of the street. Thereâs that similar chill that takes over your body when Minghao says the same words Renjun said just a few nights before, and you silently wonder if this is history repeating itself.
âSo,â Yiren says as she plops down onto your couch, kicking her feet up onto your coffee table. âHowâd meeting with Renjun go? He give you your shit back?â
âWhy wouldnât he?â you grumble as you walk over and nudge her legs to get her to put them down. âAnd you canât just flop down and sit! Put your suitcase away so itâs not in the middle of the room,â you order, trying to be stern as Yiren sticks her tongue out at you.
âSo bossyâyour best friend is visiting your cute little abode and you canât help her out with her stuff?â Yiren juts out her bottom lip into a pout as you sit next to her and wrap your arms around her waist, sinking into the couch. âOkay whatâs going on. Youâre being extra snappish âŠâ she asks a bit more seriously, pulling away from your hold to get a better look at you. âWas it Renjun? Did he say something before he left?â
âNo!â you say quickly, looking away bashfully, leaning back against the arm rest. You fucking wish you were in this sour mood because of Renjun because you could manage that. Renjun is gone, and it would hurt but youâd get over it.
You arenât sure how long itâll take to get over Minghao, if you ever do at all.
âAre you lying to me? You know I can tell when youâre not telling the truth.â
âI am telling the truth.â Just not all of it, you think to yourself.
Yiren sighs loudly, sitting up straight and facing you completely. âYou are so bad at this. Câmon tell meâwhatâd he say? Or was it not RenjunâJun? Which Jun was it? Did you and Jun fight?â
âIââ
âLike that one time two years ago and you didnât talk to each other until he came back a month later andââ
You cringe at the memory, slapping a hand over her mouth. âYiren donât bring that up. I hated that.â
âOkay sorry,â she says sheepishly. âBut seriouslyâwhat was it? Renjun? Jun? Which one? Or waitâMinâoh my gosh, donât tell me it was Minghao!â When you take more than a second to respond, Yiren gasps. âOh god, it was Minghao.â
She stands up quickly, looking down at your figure on the couch. Before you can say anything, she turns on her heel and walks towards your kitchen. âHey, where are you going!â you call out to her, sitting upright.
Yiren doesnât respond, only reaching into the fridge and pulling out two cans of pop. Walking back, she sits down in front of you and hands you a Cola, opening her own Sprite herself. âCâmon, you need to tell me about this. The pop is just here for emotional support.â
You narrow your eyes at her. You thought you were dealing with the effects of your argument with Minghao perfectly fine, but as you look down at the cold can in front of you, an uneasy feeling bubbles up in your stomach. Taking a deep breath, you set the can down on your coffee table, leaving it unopened.
Yiren gapes at you with wide eyes. âYouâre not going to have it?â Neck hanging low, you shake your head, and you hear her gasp quietly. âOh my gosh, you just turned down a Cola,â she mutters, grabbing a pillow and pushing it in your direction. âOkay now you need to tell me whatâs going on.â She pauses, shuffling closer, adding softly, âItâs okay, you can cry.â
And just like that, the dam breaks and stray tears fall from your lashes as you clutch the pillow close to your chest, blubbering your mind away to your best friend.
âI donât even get itâI thought I was over him?â you question aloud. âLike when I was with Renjun I was happy and I didnât think about Minghao because Renjun was great and he was so nice but he justââ you choke back a sob and Yiren pats your back.
âBut he left,â she murmurs softly and you want to cry harder because Yiren left too, but then you remind yourself of what Minghao said. Taking a deep breath, your wipe your face of your tears and although your lips still quiver, you start to speak.
âItâs okay,â you mutter, because it isn't like you havenât cried over this before. âI justâI guess I havenât really tried hard enough.â
âTried to ⊠what exactly?â
You huff, throwing your back onto the couch as you look up at the ceiling. âYou know: get over him.â
Yiren chuckles a little, and even through your sniffles, you laugh with her. âWhat are you sayingâyou gonna fuck around now?â
âMaybe not fuck around,â you say, crossing your legs. âMore like ⊠have some fun.â
âSo basically fuck around.â
âYiren!â
âOh câmonâyou need me to set you up with someone? My sister knows a lot ofââ
You nudge her playfully. âWhat happened to âMs. I Want Half of the Proceeds from your Wedding with Minghao?ââ
âFirst of all,â Yiren waves a finger at you pointedly, âI only asked for 25%, but if you two can come back from this, I will be asking for at least 50% because I have been rooting for you two since day one.â
âArenât you the one whoâs trying to set me up with other guys?â
âThatâs only because you come first to me. Your relationship with Minghaoââ
âThe nonexistent one,â you correct and Yiren glares at you.
âOkay fine. Your nonexistent relationship with Minghao comes second. I want to see you happy. If you get to be happy with Minghao thatâs just an added plus because, you know, 50% of all the gifts andââ
âYouâre getting 25% max.â
âDonât worry. Thereâs still time for plenty of negotiation andââ
âYiren!â
You donât live up to Yirenâs expectationsâin her words, she wanted you to have a hot girl summer, but you couldnât be bothered to go through with it. Well, sort of.
The next two months go along as your summers usually do. You take up a job near your apartment, working through the morning and afternoon, spending your evenings at home or occasionally out with Jianing.
Jianing doesnât know much about anything when it comes to your (nonexistent) relationship with Minghao, and you figure she doesnât need to. When you need a distraction, all it takes is a quick message asking her to accompany you for whatever endeavors you have going on for the night and sheâs on board.
Itâs a slow summer, but you donât really mind. Not burdened with the stress of your classes and with Jun and Minghao gone for the next two months for their own performances and promotions, you have time to focus on yourself.
Occasional parties, indulging in hobbies, daily walks in the mornings, late nights of binge watching TV shows, outings with Jianingâitâs all a part of a simple routine that youâve curated to do one thing, and one thing only: relax.
Itâs only near the end of the summer, around three weeks before your classes are set to resume, that Jun calls you to let you know heâs coming home with Minghao. He seems pretty casual about it, and youâre reminded about how Minghao probably didnât mention anything about your argument to your brother, which youâre thankful for.
Itâs a passing thought that youâll have to figure out how you want to act when you finally face him again. Whatever. Thatâs a problem for another time. Right now, you relax.
That problem for another time seems to have become a problem for now. Jun came home two days ago and things were alrightâno run-ins to Minghao and you spend time with your brother like you usually do whenever he returns: with bickering and meals.
Itâs only on the third day that things become a little ⊠a little iffy. Your brother texts you in the evening to get ready quickly because heâs stopping by with Minghao for dinner at his place, and itâs all happening so quickly that you donât have time to come up with an excuse.
So here you are, throwing on your sacred pink jacket because itâs the first thing in your vision, some old jeans, and waiting outside your apartment building much less enthusiastically than youâd like. Itâs only a matter of minutes before your phone buzzes with a text from Jun letting you know heâs here and you see Minghaoâs car pulling up in front of you.
Making your way to the back door where you usually sit with the two of them, you furrow your brows seeing Jun sitting in your usual spot.
âSit in the front,â Jun orders when you go to open the back door, âI wanna lay down.â You shrug, making your way to the passenger seat as Jun settles into the back, resting his head on the window while kicking his legs up onto the other two seats.
âHi,â you say quietly to Minghao who nods and speaks his own quick greeting, averting his attention to the wheel in front of him without much more than that.
âPlease,â he huffs, watching Jun through the rear view mirror, âdonât put your shoes on the seats. I just had the car cleaned.â Jun clicks his tongue and kicks his shoes off, continuing to lay back in the seat as Minghao starts the car. The ride is silent as he drives toward the restaurant, both you and Jun on your phones while Minghao has his eyes trained on the road.
Once he parks in front of the place, you watch from the corner of your vision to see Minghao unbuckling his seatbelt before your brother speaks up.
âYou guys can wait here, Iâm gonna grab the food,â Jun says, slipping in his shoes and making his way to the restaurant, leaving you and Minghao in thickening silence. His hands are resting on his thighs and you press your head on the window, looking out as you try to focus on anything but this.
âUh,â Minghao clears his throat, and you silently brace yourself for what he might say. âNice jacket.â
Oh.
Glancing down at what youâre wearing, you twiddle with the hem of the familiar pink jacket. You wonder if this is Minghaoâs way of holding out a figurative olive branch, and then you think harder about if youâre willing to accept it. âThanks,â you reply, matting a hand over your hair before turning your attention to Jun whoâs walking towards your car now.
Slipping into the back seat, he shakes the plastic bag in the air as he buckles himself in. âTakeout secured. Letâs go back to your place now,â Jun says, tapping on Minghaoâs shoulder from behind. Thereâs an odd tension in the air, and you donât doubt that Jun feels it, although he keeps his mouth shut about it.
No one says a word until Minghao is parking in his driveway and unlocking the front door. You follow behind the two of them, Jun grabbing the food as you enter Minghaoâs house.
âWhat are you doing tomorrow?â Jun asks, putting the takeout bag on the coffee table of the living room as you all begin to settle down.
You shrug off your coat as you say, âUh, I have to go back to my place and go out for the afternoon and evening with Jianing. Me and her have this little monthly date day thing, and weâre going to the city.â
âWha-a-a-t,â Jun drawls out, a frown etched onto his face. You narrow your eyes at him, shrugging.
âWhat? Itâs not like youâre leaving right after tomorrow.â
âYeah, but Iâm not here for long. I wanted to do something tomorrow, since I might be doing stuff after that!â Jun whines, pointing at Minghao. âWe might be going to this cool store and take some pictures and stuff.â
You huff, slightly annoyed as you flop down on a couch. âOkay well canât you do that tomorrow then? I already have plans.â
Jun pouts, and if he wasnât so on your nerves right now, you would poke some fun at him. âWhy-y-y? You knew I was coming this week!â
âWell itâs not like I can clear my schedule for you. If you wanted to do something you shouldâve told me earlier!â
âI let you know last week I was coming down!â
âJun,â you say with a half laugh, noticing the way Minghaoâs eyes have been flickering back and forth between you two through the whole conversation, âone week is not enough time to change some plans. Iâve been meeting with Jianing consistently at this time of month for over a year!â
âBut stillââ
âItâs not like if I showed up to Korea whenever the timeâs convenient for me, youâd drop everything youâre doing to spend time with me!â you exclaim.
Junâs fists ball at his side before he says, âThatâs because my job is important andââ
âThe stuff I do in my life might not seem important to you but it is very much important to me. Sorry Iâve made commitments to other people before I even knew you were coming, but I donât know why youâd expect me to drop all my plans just for you. Itâs not even like we arenât going to see each other afterwards too.â
âWell Iâd only hope thatâs the caseâI only ever see you once every few months so sorry for wanting to take some of your time.â
âGuysââ Minghao starts to say, standing between the two of you but when both you and Jun glare at him, he steps back.
âDo you think your time is worth more than mine or something?â you scoff at Jun, ignoring Minghao.
âYou know I didnât mean it like that.â
âIâm sorry, what exactly did you mean it like then?â you hiss.
Jun sucks in a breath between clenched teeth and runs a hand through his hair. âYou know what I meant. Things are justâtheyâre different. You wouldnât understand.â
âRight yeah. I wonât understand because I donât have all these girls throwing themselves at me, making me think Iâm entitled to everyoneâs damn time.â Maybe you crossed a line with that one, but youâre too angry to care now. Hot tears well up in your lash line, threatening to fall any moment now.
âYou were the one who was being a brat when you found out I was going to go to Korea in the first place!â Jun exclaims. âFucking hell, why are you making such a big deal out of me wanting to spend some time with you now?â
Your face screws up into some kind of ugly frown at the words, and you clench your fists as your side. âA brat?â you repeat. âA brat? Is that seriously what you think of me?
âWell you did make a pretty damn big scene about me leaving, so yeah, maybe I do feel entitled to some of your time seeing that you were the one who was desperate for it in the first place.â
âDesperate? Are you kidding meâdesperate? I was sixteen and you dumped the fact that you were moving away in like less than two months on me âof course I was upset but desperate? Well fuck you too I guess.â You punctuate the last word by turning on your heel, grabbing your coat off and marching past Minghao and over to the door.
You donât hear Jun say anything after you do, and for that you are grateful because you donât think youâll be able to handle hearing his voice again. Walking out the foyer past the door, you stomp your way to your car, forcefully yanking the driverâs seat open and plopping yourself down with a heavy thud.
Without a word, you press your forehead against the steering and scream a loud and painful, âFUCK!â You canât even remember a damn thing you or Jun said but all that throttles in your head is the word brat and you feel you might just pull the steering wheel off your stupid car and tear just about everything else apart too.
The prospect is pretty tempting, actually, and in your red, you continue to hit your head, albeit gently, against the wheel as you mutter incoherent curses to yourself. The thud of your skull against the smooth letter rings in your ears until it becomes all that you can hear, so loud that it almost drowns out the knocking sound that comes from outside.
âHoly shit!â you gasp, when you see Minghao from the corner of your vision, standing outside your car with his lips pressed into the thin line. Rolling down your windows, you grimace. âYou fucking scared me so bad. Please never creep up on me like that again.â
He narrows his eyes at you. âDonât fucking storm out like that again then,â Minghao says, and your eyes widen slightly when you hear his voice. Itâs harder, firmer, more serious than youâve ever heard before.
âWhat are youââ
âYou canât drive when itâs night and youâre sobbingââ
âI am not sobbing,â you fruitlessly choke out, wiping some tears off your cheek as you straighten your back and glare at him.
âLook I get youâre mad at Jun and all but can you please calm down and talk to me soââ
You let out a humorless laugh as you begin to roll your windows back up. âDonât even get me started on you.â
Minghao clicks his tongue as he sticks a hand into your window to stop it from going up any further, looking sideways for a second before turning back to you. âOkay well I donât want you to drive yourself home like this. Itâs not safe.â
âI am not staying here tonight.â
âThen let me drive you home,â Minghao suggests and you open up to object but no words come out. âYou agree? Câmon, step out.â You let out nothing more than a huff as you open the door, slipping out quickly and shuffling to the other side where you sit with your arms crossed over your chest, bottom lip jutting out into a pout.
Minghao has already taken your spot, hands on the same steering wheel that you were planning on smashing with your head just minutes ago. Heâs quiet for a few moments as he backs out of the driveway and starts driving down the street, the car echoing nothing but your soft sniffles that havenât seemed to stop.
When Minghao opens his mouth again, youâre bracing yourself for a round of chiding, but all that comes out is a one-word question. âPop?â He takes your silence as a confirmation, and soon enough Minghao is pulling up to that same convenience store. âDo you want me to get it for you?â he asks after heâs parked in front of the convenience store.
You purse your lips together, finally letting yourself turn to look at him. You really want to be mad at him but when you catch the way his fingers are shoved into his pockets, teeth gnawing at his bottom lip as he awaits your answer, you start to realize that Minghao might be just as apprehensive about this as you are.
âItâs fine,â you mutter, unbuckling your seatbelt so you can get out, Minghao following you quickly.
Youâre the first to walk in this time, grabbing a Cola for yourself before looking at Minghao with a raised brow. When he nods, you toss him another can and he makes his way to the cash register. Heâs about to pull out his wallet when youâre brushing past him and getting there first, holding up your card to the machine proudly.
âJust because I donât want to be in any more debt to you,â you murmur, handing Minghao a can after youâve paid for them both. You lead the way, walking out of the door and slotting yourself into the passenger seat of your car and Minghao gets into the seat next to you, turning on the engine.
Youâre still quiet when he starts driving towards your apartment building, and you think that this is the perfect chance for you to drown in the silence. Maybe if you pretend youâre alone, youâll be able to forget about all the thoughts running through your mind.
Pressing your eyes shut, you slump down into your seat and just as youâre about to let your mind drift into the silence, you hear a familiar rattle of the snare and guitar bridge and your eyes snap open, staring at Minghao directly. He faces forward, eyes trained on the road as he pulls closer to the curb in front of your complex, sighing deeply when the car starts to slow down.
âWhat are you trying to do Minghao?â you finally say weakly, burying your face in your hands. âYouâyouâre playing Creep and you took me to get Cola and all you were supposed to do was take me home soââ
âCan I not try to make you feel better? I donât want you to be upset, so Iâm sorry if Iâm trying to do the things I know you enjoy,â Minghao responds with a heavy breath, parking in front of your building just like that night he did when he picked you up from the bus stop after you met with Renjun.
The deep strumming of guitar and vibrations of the bass bounce off the walls of your car, and you slip into your seat as the words of the song sink in.âWhat the hell am I doing here?â Glancing up at Minghao, your vision grows blurry. âMinghao âŠâ your voice is quiet and strained when you call for him, and in that moment, you know.
All those years ago when you wanted to kiss him and hold him and pull him close, but you didnât because you were scared. When you wanted to let your tongues collide and tug at his hair, but you didnât because you had so much to lose.
You still have so much to lose, but youâre not scared anymore.
And it seems Minghao isnât either.
Tonight, you get to taste the lingering drops of Cola on his tongue. You get to feel his arms fumbling over the armrest, slipping around your waist and yanking you onto his lap. You get to hold his neck and let your fingers sit in his hair. You get to indulge.
Minghaoâs mouth is hot against yours, tongue lapping at your bottom lip when you take a sacred moment to breathe on top of him before your eyes are fluttering back shut and your lips mold into one once again. He hugs you so close you donât know how you can still breathe, donât know how your bones donât melt into each other in this burning moment.
Your lips work fervently to slide against each other in a wet, calculated mess that has you whimpering into Minghaoâs mouth when one of his hands cups your jaw. His thumb is soft against your cheekbone when he tilts your head to the side so that your noses brush against either and his lips delve deeper into the caverns of your mouth.
You donât know how long you two go at it, fingers grappling at whatever skin you can, Minghaoâs hand brushing under your shirt and stroking the plush of your hips. And when you feel like you canât breathe anymore because your heart is so full, you pull away, letting the thin string of saliva connect your shiny lips.
Your brain is foggy and you and Minghao simply sit in the comfortable silence. Well, almost comfortable silence.
You shouldnât try to depend on anyone.
âW-wait,â you stutter when Minghao leans forward in hopes to catch your lips in another fleeting kiss. âOh my god,â you mutter to yourself, pushing his shoulders back against the seat as you try to shuffle off his lap.
Minghao holds your waist tightly, but you break free of the grasp. âWhat are you doiâhey, wait a sec!â
âYou said youâre trying to make me feel better but you just did exactly the opposite,â you scoff, slipping on your coat as you push the car door open.
âWhat are you talking aboââ You cut him off by slamming the door, and Minghao quickly grabs your keys and follows after you. âSlow down.â
You whip around to face him, tears streaming down your face for what feels nth time tonight. âLook, you left like two months ago spewing all this stuff about how I should be independent but the second you come back you act like youâre trying so hard to make me feel better and stuff and thenââ You take a deep breath, ââthen we makeout and youâfuck I donât know, I donât know what you expect from me! Do you just expect me to forget about this and not get upset when you leave again?â you choke out. âJust keep my keys and drive yourself back to your place. Iâll pick up my car later,â you mutter.
âCan you stop doing this? Itâs just like what happened last time, and I donât want to have to leave if youâreâif weâre not okay.â
âWhat âwe?â Werenât you the one who told me to not expect anyone to stay? Iâm not going to do this âweâ and âusâ thing with someone who is just going to leave all over again. Iâm not going to expect you to stay.â
âLook, I just donât want this to be hanging over your head when Iâm gone.â
Ironic, you think to yourself. You want to tell Minghao that heâs been hanging over your head ever since you met him all those years ago, but you bite back the words.
âMinghao,â you say, your voice strained and tired, âIâm already exhausted and my brain isnât working so can you please just give me my space.â
And if Minghao is one thing, itâs not pushy, and you know that this is all it takes to get him to back off. Though, you donât miss the way his face falls as he steps back quietly.
âSee you,â he mutters through gritted teeth as he turns on his heel, and you canât tell if youâre relieved or bothered by the way he leaves so silently.
You donât see Minghao or Jun after that night. Theyârewere supposed to leave for Korea in the next four days, and so you spend those four days lodged up in your apartment, not leaving unless absolutely necessaryâyouâre scared that you might run into one of them, as pathetic as that sounds.
Jun doesnât text you and you donât text him. Itâs a bit abnormal, you two communicate at least once every two days, if not more. Itâs a bit of an unspoken rule, but now that youâre both hot-headed and very much not in the right mind, you figure some rules are meant to be broken.
Itâs two days after Jun and Minghao were scheduled to leave, the only confirmation that you got that they actually did leave being the group picture at the airport your father sent to the family group chat.
Jianing comes to your apartment when you finally call her over, quickly picking up on your sullen state.
âI donât get it,â she says with a shrug after you explain to her everything that happened between you and Jun and Minghao.
âWell yeah, I guess you donât, but this has been going on for a while,â you reply begrudgingly, sinking into your couch as she stares at you blankly from your armchair.
âJustâI dunnoâtalk to them?â
You give her a funny look. âHow?â you groan, throwing your head back. âThey wonât be back for like a month at least, and I donât want to call them.â
âI forget theyâre famous sometimesâ Jianing mutters, rolling her eyes, and you laugh at the comment.
âYou and me both,â you say, straightening your back.
âBut still, I donât get it. I mean just visit them?â she suggests casually.
âI canât just fly up to Korea unannounced!â you exclaim, bewildered.
Jianing rolls her eyes at you and you frown. âWhy not? I mean you just said this might go on for a while if you donât talk to them so I donât get it. Just go see them.â
YOURS TRULY
you: chan i need ur help [8:13 AM] chan: this is ur first time texting me in three months [8:15 AM] chan: so i am going to assume this is pretty important [8:15 AM] you: iâm at incheon airport [8:16 AM] chan: what [8:17 AM] you: what [8:17 AM] chan: jun didnât say anything about u coming??! [8:19 AM] you: DONâT TELL HIM [8:19 AM] chan: what ⊠[8:20 AM] you: iâm surprising him [8:20 AM] chan: ????? [8:21 AM] chan: who knows [8:21 AM] you: um you do [8:21 AM] chan: thank u [8:22 AM] chan: so what do u need [8:22 AM] you: can u pick me up [8:23 AM] chan: i donât have a choice do i [8:24 AM] you: nope :3 [8:24 AM]
When black SUV stops in front of you by the curb at the airport, you smile brightly, waving at the driver as the windows begin to roll down. Youâre about to chirp a quick, âHi Chan!â but the words get caught in your throat when you see whoâs driving.
âJeonghan?â you ask confusedly. He waves at you from the front seat, and Chan sticks his head in from the back to look at you through the window.
âIâm sorry!â he exclaims, opening the door to help you pull in your suitcase and get situated into the back seat. âLook, I tried to leave without anyone noticing but they saw me so I told them I was going to the gym, but he said he wanted to come and ââ Chan glares at the man in the passenger seat, ââ I donât even know why since he hasnât gone to the gym in agesââ
âWatch it Chan!â Jeonghan calls out from the front as the cat starts to move, pulling an eye roll out of the boy sitting next to you.
âWhatever. Basically, I had no choice but to bring him along and tell them I was actually picking you up.â
âYou guys didnât tell Jun, did you?â you ask worriedly.
âIâno,â Jeonghan says. âAnd even if we tried, he wonât be awake for another hour or whatever. Thatâs besides the point anywaysâChan is terrible at lying.â
âYou caught me off guard! I wasnât expecting to see anyone this morning, so I didnât have any excuses prepared âŠâ Chan huffs, sinking into his seat as you glance back and forth between them nervously.
âThank you for trying anyways,â you say sincerely, adjusting in your seat. âI know this was all really sudden but I didnât plan anything out and I kinda ended up here before I could even process anything,â you add.
âHey, Minghao was telling us about these really good cupcakes you makeâif you have time, can you bake them for us?â Chan asks, out of the blue.
You give him a funny look and then smile. âSure, if I have the time. Iâd like toâthey told me Mingyu tries to make them for you guys.â
âYeah! That wouldââ
âThank you, but Iâm going to assume that you are here for a reason other than making us your infamous cupcakes,â Jeonghan says, merging onto the freeway.
âAs much as Iâd love for that to be why Iâm here, youâre right,â you mutter, resting your head against the headrest.
âIs everything alright?â Jeonghan asks.
As youâre about to respond, Chan chimes in. âThis is about Jun, isnât it?â
âAiâChannie, donât jump to conclusions,â Jeonghan reprimands but Chan shakes his head, holding his hand up as he turns to you with wide eyes.
âNo, no, Iâm not assuming anything. Iâm right, arenât I?â Partly. Chan continues. âWell itâs justâI can kinda tell. Heâs being a little snappier. Jeonghan wouldnât know butââ
Jeonghan gives Chan a warning look through the rear view mirror. âWhat do you mean I wouldnât know?â
âHannie, just listen to me. So me and Soonyoung and Minghao and Jun have been practicing at night rightâfor that next performanceâand you know that Jun has a bit of a temper, especially in the night, but I donât knowâitâs just been different recently.â
You stifle a scoff when Chan mentions Jun having a short temper, looking out the window hoping no one heard. Jun does have a bit of a fiery streak, but the truth is that youâre just as sporadic as him.
Fire meets fire. Huh, wonder what that makes. More fire, probably. Thatâs what got you here, isnât it? Unfortunately.
âHas, uh,â you pause wondering if you should ask this, but curiosity does kill the cat, after all. âHas Minghao seemed ⊠off?â
Jeonghan narrows his eyes at you. âWhatâs Minghao got to do with this? Did something happen with him too?â Curse that emotionally intelligent man.
Chan eyes flicker between the ground and you. âItâs hard to tell when Minghao is upset. He seems normal even when heâs upset so I canât really tell ⊠why though?â
âJustâjust a lot of stuff. I think I need to see them both. Separately.â
Jeonghan nods, pursing his lips together before responding, âDo you need our help?â
Jeonghan takes you to his apartment first so you have a moment to drop your suitcase off somewhere, and you get to say hi to Seungkwan who youâre pretty sure didnât even recognize you in his drowsy state.
âWhereâre we going?â you ask when you get back outside of the building heading towards the car.
âCâmon, letâs walk,â Chan says, pulling you away from the car.
âJunâs apartment building is just down the street here,â Jeonghan explains. âHe should be sleeping right now, so just wake him up.â
âAre you kidding me? He might kill me!â you complain with a frown.
Chan huffs, âWell you did come here unannounced and without a plan, so you donât have much of a choice anyways.â
You chew on your lip as you fruitlessly try to come up with an answer, sighing in defeat when you come up with nothing.
âExactly,â Jeonghan concludes, stopping in front of a building thatâs built similar to his. âAnyways, his suite number is 345 on the third floor. You should know the code to his apartment right?â
You nod, but then shake your head. âI know it, but I think Iâll just knock until he wakes up. He might actually kill me if someone shows up inside his home unannounced.â
Chan laughs at that when the two of you lead you to the elevator of this new building. âThat, he might.â
âSo encouraging,â you mutter, sticking your tongue out at them as the elevator door opens. âAnyways, thank you for helping me, really. Iâll make cupcakes if I make it out of this alive,â you promise while you step in.
âYou better!â Jeonghan calls out as the doors slide shut and the elevator begins to take you up.
Itâs now, when youâre alone, that it all begins to sink in. Youâre in Korea. Youâre about to see Jun. You might dieâokay maybe youâre being a little dramatic, but you arenât sure what to do with yourself so your mind is jumping towards the worst possible scenario as you reach the third floor and make your way to his apartment.
You stand in front of room 345 for a few moments once you arrive, not even sure if youâll manage to go through with this. What the fuck are you even going to say?
(Un?)fortunately, you have a tendency to not think before you act, and before you have a second of thought your knuckles are rapping against the door. Itâs silent for a moment and you wonder if you should go again.
Taking a deep breath, you continue knocking on the door at a steady rate before you hear soft footsteps growing louder in volume until they stop at the door. You hold your breath and let your hand fall, fisting it at your sides in anticipation.
When you see the door crack open, a wave of relief washes over you. But when you see Junâs blank face as he looks down on you, a new sense of uneasiness takes over.
âWhat are you doing in my apartment?â Ah, how nostalgic.
âSo cold. You arenât going to let me in?â
Jun rolls his eyes, and you grow more anxious because you canât tell if heâs being playful or not. He steps to the side though, and you quickly slip through the door so he can close and lock it behind you.
âWhat are you doing here?â he reiterates and you feel your tongue go dry.
âUh, Chan told me that youâre beingâwellâhow do I put this?â you mutter to yourself, rocking back and forth on your feet.
âDifficult?â Jun guesses, bitterness laced in the word and you cringe at the tone.
âI guess.â
âI donât think you came all the way to Korea just because Chan told you I was being difficult.â
âI, uh, I talked to Jianing about it when she visited and ⊠I guess I felt I should come see you.â
âSo if Jianing didnât talk to you about this, then you just wouldnât have talked about it?â Jun asks harshly and you glare at him.
âWell itâs not like you wouldâve come talk to me about it either,â you retort, and Jun goes quiet at them. âAnd Jianing didnât make this decision for me, by the way, I made it all by myself.â
âOkay well youâre here now. What is it?â An uncomfortable silence sits between you two. âIf you only came here to just stand there and stare off into space thenââ
âJun, please shut your mouth for like one minute,â you mutter, pinching the bridge of your nose. âI-I wanted to apologize. That night I ⊠I was on edge.â Jun watches you intently as you finally meet his gaze. âThere was a lot running through my mind and I was justâjust fucking annoyed at everything and I took everything you said the worst way.â
A feeling of worry climbs up your throatâyou and Jun donât often apologize, at least not like this. Apologies usually come in the form of figurative olive treesâyou buy him a LEGO set, he buys you a gift card to your favorite cafe, or something among that. Then again, this isnât your usual argument with Jun, and maybe sometimes resorting to more traditional methods are most effective.
Jun sighs softly, not looking at you, and you grow worried that heâs even more angry than you anticipated. You brace yourself for his next possible words. âI ⊠I did say some mean stuff too. Iâm sorryâI justâI have a shitty temper. You know that. Chan probably told you that too.â Jun is silent for a second before continuing. âIs ⊠is everything okay?â
The question isnât quite what youâre expecting and you press your lips together tightly because you want to cry. You want to let the tears stream down your cheeks and tell Jun that you have no idea but also the perfect idea of what youâre doing and itâs all jumbled up mess in your head.
âI guessâI mean, I hate fighting with you,â you admit. âBut, thatâs why I came here and we didnât say goodbye the last time and I know that was partly my fault but also I missed you.â
âBut are you okay?â
âJunââ
âBecause I know youâre stubbornâit really is annoying sometimes but Iâm not one to complain,â he adds with a huff, âand I know youâre a little weirdââ
You both laugh and you point a finger at him, âWatch itâyou and me both.â
âWhatever,â he says lightly before turning to a more serious tone. âBut I never thought weâd fight again like that one time two years ago andââ
âWhy does everyone keep bringing that up!? Yiren said that too,â you sigh.
âTo make a point. Which, by the way, is me going back to asking you if everythingâs okay. I just ⊠I know that youâre a little crazy but I never thought that youâd fly over here for something that we could probably sort out over the phone. Not that Iâm not glad to see you here, I mean, I am, Iâm just ⊠worried.â
âI kissed Minghao,â you blurt out, immediately slapping a hand over your mouth after you do.
âWhat?!â Junâs eyes go wide for a moment before he relaxes a little. âIs that whatâs been up with you?â
âWhat do you mean âup with me?ââ
âMoody. Cranky. Like youâre in high school again.â
You cross your arms over your chest. âI have no idea what youâre talking about.â You chew on your lip as you try to read Junâs expression. He doesnât seem mad nor happy nor confused, and youâre running out of emotions to label him under.
âI knew you liked him in high school, you know. Thin walls, plus Yiren is loud as hell.â
âUgh, I always told her to keep it down! She didnât believe me!â
âDoesnât matter now. What you or him do isnât much of my business anyways,â Jun mutters, awkwardly stuffing his hands in the pockets of his hoodies. âI mean I guess it is, if it makes you all upset and not okay like this,â he continues.
You can tell heâs encouraging you to explain more, and you press your eyes together trying to figure what and what not you should say. âHas Minghao ⊠has he seemed different?â
âI mean not really, but also itâs hard to tell with him becauseââ Your whole finger droops and Jun quickly places a hand on your shoulder. âHey, what is this about? Did something happen? You know you can tell me.â
âItâs a lot,â you confess. âI donât know, I-I came here to talk to the both of you but I havenât even thought about what to say to him. I kind of booked my tickets last night.â
âLast night?!âJun exclaims. âAre you stupid or what?â
âMaybe I am!â you murmur, slapping your palm against your forehead. Jun looks down at your pained expression and frowns.
âYouâre not going to tell me what happened, are you?â
âWhat happened to, âI donât care what you guys do it isnât my business?ââ
âWell it is my business if youâre upset! Iâm the only person whoâs allowed to be a bitch to you.â
âWell ditto to you too!â You follow with a sigh. âI think I just need to talk to him.â
âHeâs at the gym right now. Do you want to get coffee instead?â
âHogging me all to yourself? I know you missed me but donât you think this is a little unfairâIâd like to at least say hi to the others first. Or maybe have some time to sleep. I kind of got here at like seven in the morning.â
âBe grateful! Iâm actually looking out for you, because theyâll literally hound you, plus I want to make up for not spending time with you last time I visited.â
You grin at the words, rolling your eyes playfully. âFine. But youâre paying.â
âWhen do I not pay for you?â
âLoads of times!â
âThatâs because you insist on paying for yourself.â
âIrrelevant!â you exclaim triumphantly, waving a fist in the air before Jun locks his arm around your neck and traps you in a headlock. Good times.
âWe have afternoon practice, then recording in the studio in the evening, but we should be done by like eight,â Jun explains, taking a picture of the coffee in front of him.
âMust you take a picture of everything?â you sigh, taking a sip of your own drink. Jun rolls his eyes, flicking your knee from under the table.
âI am a celebrity. I kinda need to keep records of everything I do.â
âOkay well Iâm your sister and I kinda need you to help me talk to Minghao.â
âJust likeâI dunnoâfind him and talk to him. Canât be that hard.â
âYouâugh, youâre just like Jianing,â you groan. âNo help!â
âOkay fine, fine. What do you want me to do? Corner him? Lock him into a closet and keep him there so you can talk to him? Force him toââ
âJunnie what the hell,â you mutter, slapping a hand to your forehead. âI think Iâm just going to have to ask Jeonghan and Chan for help again becauseââ
âOkay no. Iâll help. What do you need me to do?â
âHave you been listening to me? Tell me when and where I can talk to him!â
âWell I already suggested the closet but you turned that down soââ
âJun.â
âWe can try the meeting room? Heâs there a lot and itâs usually empty in the evenings. He responds to emails and shit there, I donât know, so you wonât be interrupting much.â
âYou sure itâll work?â
Jun cocks an eyebrow up. âYou donât trust me?â You kick him under the table and he winces. âOkay yes, yes, itâll work so would you stop kickingâhey! I said stop kicking!â
âWe have afternoon practice, then recording in the studio in the evening, but we should be done by like eight,â Jun explains, taking a picture of the coffee in front of him.
âMust you take a picture of everything?â you sigh, taking a sip of your own drink. Jun rolls his eyes, flicking your knee from under the table.
âI am a celebrity. I kinda need to keep records of everything I do.â
âOkay well Iâm your sister and I kinda need you to help me talk to Minghao.â
âJust likeâI dunnoâfind him and talk to him. Canât be that hard.â
âYouâugh, youâre just like Jianing,â you groan. âNo help!â
âOkay fine, fine. What do you want me to do? Corner him? Lock him into a closet and keep him there so you can talk to him? Force him toââ
âJunnie what the hell,â you mutter, slapping a hand to your forehead. âI think Iâm just going to have to ask Jeonghan and Chan for help again becauseââ
âOkay no. Iâll help. What do you need me to do?â
âHave you been listening to me? Tell me when and where I can talk to him!â
âWell I already suggested the closet but you turned that down soââ
âJun.â
âWe can try the meeting room? Heâs there a lot and itâs usually empty in the evenings. He responds to emails and shit there, I donât know, so you wonât be interrupting much.â
âYou sure itâll work?â
Jun cocks an eyebrow up. âYou donât trust me?â You kick him under the table and he winces. âOkay yes, yes, itâll work so would you stop kickingâhey! I said stop kicking!â
You twiddle your thumbs nervously behind your back as you wait in the elevator with Jeonghan. Jun had to take care of something with one of the other members, so he sent you off with the older boy to take you to the meeting room.
âHeâll be there, donât worry,â Jeonghan tells you as he pats your shoulder lightly. âI just checked his location and Iâm positive heâs there right now.â
âThanks,â you say with a sigh, shifting your weight from leg to leg, âbut Iâm more worried about what Iâm going to say. I think you already know but I planned like zero percent of this.â
âItâs becoming increasingly evident, unfortunately,â Jeonghan admits when the elevator dings and the door opens onto a floor full of rooms. âYouâll figure it out, Iâm sure, seeing as youâre just like Jun.â
âWhatâs that supposed to mean?â
Jeonghan chuckles and leads you to a door a few steps down the hallway, pointing to it. âDonât worry about it. Heâll be in there. Now if youâll excuse me, Iâll be down on floor three making some ramen,â he says cheerily, waving at you before retreating to elevatory before you have even a moment to protest.
So now youâre left with nothing but yourself and yet another door. This time, instead of knocking your life away, your hand is pressed against the knob as you debate whether or not you should turn it or not.
Once again, your body acts without your mind and youâre quietly opening the door and poking your head through the crack. Inside is Minghao with headphones over his ears, sitting at the end of a long table with his head crooked down as he scrolls through his lap top.
He doesnât hear you, but you arenât sure if itâs for the better or the worse. In some ways, you still have a chance to run, but in others, youâll have to call out to him if you want him to notice you. Gulping, you realize that youâve been too scared for too long and so you clear your throat.
âMinghao,â you call out.
It only takes a second for his eyes to shoot up, hands flying to his headphones to take them off as he takes in the sight of you in front of him. Youâre at opposite ends of the room right now, and you nervously shut the door behind you as you finally meet his gaze.
âWhat are you doing here?â
âIââ You inhale sharply. ââI donât know. I just think we both needed to talk.â
You can see him visibly gulp as he stands up, and looks away as if trying to figure out what he should do with himself.
âShit,â he mutters under his breath, dread washing over you.
âIâm sorry,â you blurt out, face burning. âI know I just showed up like this without warning and I know thatâs not fair so if you donât want to talk you know I totally get it andââ you start to blabber so fast you hardly notice him walking over and down the length of the table, ââI just really wanted to see you and talk to you but I couldnât do it over the phone becauseââ
âSlow down,â Minghao says firmly, now standing in front of you as he gazes down with wide eyes. âIs everything okay? When did you come hereâwait, did you come here just to talk to me?â
âWell yeah. And Jun.â
âAre you okay?â Minghao asks softly. âThis doesnât seem like you.â
You wince at the familiar words but shake it off. âI know, I just had so much to say and Iâm sorry because you were right, and when you said you didnât want this hanging over my head I was angry and I thought I could ignore this and ignore you but I was wrong and just really needed to sort things out. And the night you picked me up after Renjun and allâI know you told me to not depend anyone or anythingâand I know Iâm not listening to you right now and I donât want you to be disappointed butââ
âStop,â Minghao says, holding a hand up. âDisappointed? Iâplease donât think that. The stuff I said that night was âŠâ he sighs before continuing. âYou were so upset that night because you didnât have us around and I felt so bad but also, there wasnât anything I could do about that.â
âI âŠâ your eyebrows knit together as you try to find the right words. â⊠I know that. I didnât mean to make it feel like you had to change anything, or that it was your fault.â
âI know andââ
âWait, please hear me out. I donât want to ever make you think that I blame you or Jun for leavingâI-Iâm so happy for you guys you donât understand. I was just ⊠I was bitter,â you admit. âAnd I was jealous of you because you get to be around my own brother more than me and ⊠I guess I was also jealous of Jun because he gets to be around you so often too.â
You finish your confession by burying your face in your hands, face heating up as you can only imagine the look on his face. He says your name softly, and you peek up at him through the gap between your fingers.
âHey, no, I get it. I mean, I guess I donât exactly understand how youâre feeling but I donât blame you either.â
âI wrote you a letter,â you blurt out, a hand digging into your pocket as it toys around with the folded paper inside. Minghao raises a brow, and you pull it out and hold it in front of him. âRight after you guys left,â you explain as he takes the paper from your hand, carefully unfolding it. âDonât open it now! Thatâs ⊠embarrassing. Just read it when Iâm not here or something because I might just die out of humiliation.â
When Minghao chuckles, you feel some of the tension in your shoulders dissolve. âNoted,â he murmurs, tucking it into the pocket of his sweats before turning his attention back to you with a more serious expression which has your stomach tying up in knots.
âYou know how my job is. I canât promise how often Iâll be home and when Iâll be able to make time and I know that people leaving hurt you so much and ⊠I guess I just didnât want to give you hope that I would be able to give you a ânormalâ relationship, because I canât, even though I want to. I think when I told you all that, I justâfuckâI hoped that youâd be able to focus on someone better for you.â
You want to cry and tell him that you donât want someone âbetter,â but choose to save those words for a different time. âT-then whyâd you kiss me that night?â you ask quietly.
âIââ Minghao pauses, looking down as he searches for what heâs about to say. âI only have so much self control.â
You chew on your lip, debating if you should frown or grin at his statement. âSo youâyou wanted to kiss me?â Minghao responds in a heartbeat.
âOf course I did,â and then he clears his throat, âI wanted to for a while. I still do.â
Chuckling nervously, you start to say, âI donât knââ
The air is successfully sucked from your lungs when Minghao slides his hand around your neck, angling your jaw up with his gentle thumb. You think you might just go dizzy from the way heâs touching you until his warm mouth presses against yours, and this is the moment you feel every last muscle in your body let go.
He kisses you softer than the first time, his tongue running against your bottom lip for only a moment before you let your hand grip at his torso instinctively. âSorry,â Minghao murmurs sheepishly when he breaks away. âTold you. Only so much self control.â
âI-I wonât complain,â you admit quickly, and though you let your hand drop to your side, Minghao keeps his where it is: cradling your cheek. Heâs quiet for a moment before whispering again, and the words make your face burn and your heart fly around in circles.
âCan I kiss you again?â
link to smut!
âYou have everything? Your tickets?â you ask as you lean against the doorframe. Youâre both standing outside your parents house right now, waiting for Jun to finish his last bit of packing (why he was so insistent on you two coming quickly when even he wasnât ready is still a mystery to you) so you can call over the van to take them to the airport.
Minghao shrugs at you, pulling out his wallet to look through the pockets to double check. As heâs shuffling through them, a familiar piece of paper sticks out and grabs your attention. âYou keep my letter in your wallet?â
Minghao nods, seemingly unbothered by your surprise. âYeah. Where else would I keep it?â
âWell, I donât know butââ
âItâs a cute letter!â Minghao reasons. âAnd I like having it with me. Like a little good luck charm.â
You press a kiss to his cheek when he says that, but continue to say, âI donât get whatâs so cute about me getting drunk and writing to you.â
âOkay that part, I donât like. Seriously. Underage drinking is not cool,â Minghao mutters. âBut the rest of the letter is pretty nice I guess,â he teases, tucking his wallet back into his pocket.
âPretty nice?â you scoff, trying to snatch the wallet back from him to grab your letter. He swipes it away too quickly though, and youâre left pawing at his chest to try and get it back. âYou donât deserve that letter! I put my heart and soul into it!â
âHeart and soul? I think you mean you poured five shots of vodka into it.â You frown deeply, and Minghao relaxes his shoulders. âOkay Iâm sorryâyou know I love the letter.â
âDo I?â you huff stubbornly, looking at the ground.
Minghao traces a hand down your face and tilts your chin upwards. âCâmon look at me,â he murmurs, and you begrudgingly meet his gaze. âI love the letter.â He pecks you on the lips. âDo you believe me now?â
âYou might have to kiss me one more time for that.â
Minghao grins and presses his lips on yours again, a little harder this time. âGood now?â
âYesâyou got lucky.â
âOkay good ⊠but just for extra measures, I have something that might sweeten the deal,â Minghao tells you, pulling a folded paper out of his pocket and handing it to you. Carefully, you take it and unravel it, glancing over the words.
Thereâs a lotâlike a lotâand Minghaoâs face flushes as you skim over the paragraphs he wrote, slapping a hand over the paper. âOkay donât read it in front of me!â he whines, and you beam because history has a tendency to repeat itself.
âFine, fine,â you sigh, looking down at it one more time when your eyes catch a little note at the bottom.
Pursing your lips, you glance up and find Minghao watching you with wide eyes and a bright smile, and you canât help but fling yourself into his arms. Your heart swells when you feel him wrap his hands around you rightly pulling him close as the words cast their imprint into your mind.
Youâre happy. So, so, so happy.
Yours truly, Xu Minghao (weirdo)
P.S. I love you.
a/n. okay wow i can't believe this is done ... genuinely put so much into this fic i hope u all enjoyed reading it as much as i enjoyed writing it! i definitely might be writing more about these two bc i loved them so muchđ i had like 2 more ideas for a smut in mind but decided not to add them but if you'd be interested in reading them, i might post them as a oneshot/bonus, so lmk what you're interested in! please reblog if u did, and let me know ur thoughtsâit would mean a lot to me :3
tags. @synthetickitsune @ixayjun @leejihoonownsmyheart @dahliatopia @gyuswhore @hoeforcheol @5xiang @hajimelvr @miriamxsworld @blinkjunhui @lixiel0ver @josefines-things @mimisxs @ming-h0e @kawennote09 @bbyjjunie @junhui-recs @ichorjeon (strikethrough could not be tagged)
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I wish you were here again
I wish you were here again :(
It's not the first time I've been home since you died, but still, it hasn't been easy
I remember you so much. The things we used to do, the way you used to are for me.
I saw the bench in the park on the hill where you used to smoke weed with Anika. I saw the theater where we used to hang out after class.
They're only a couple blocks from each other! It's crazy how close everything is here.
Farther out, I remember the hill behind the high school that you showed me. Ive been there so many times, but every time I say "death hill" I still think of you
I go there a lot. With people I care about. It's my favorite spot to look at the city at night. I don't know if you ever got to see the view, but it's great! Especially on the fourth of July. You can see like 3 different fireworks show from one spot!
Unfortunately some dumb ass bought the property in front of it and fenced off most of it. The actual spot on the hill with the tree is still there, but I'm sure youd hate it just as much as I do.
What makes me saddest though is when I'm downtown and I see that gazebo. It's not something you ever got to make many memories with me at, though I do remember some.
I remember when we were walking home from the carnival, and we were passing by the park the gazebo is In.
Some creepy guy in his car kept staring at us. It was like 3 am, and there were no cars and he was just sitting at a stop sign. I remember you shouted 'do you fucking want something?' And he drove away. I always admired how brave you were for your friends.
I'm sure if you were with me in college you would've pushed me to meet more. Mind you COVID n all so idk. But idk. You would've told me I keep going, n pushing on. That I'm not alone. I just wish more people said that to you.
Y'know that gazebo was where Danny and I held a vigil for you. We had no idea what we were doing, I just picked a spot n a date. A week past the day of your death.
I was going crazy messaging people, just trying to figure it out. But a lot of people were down to show up. The day of, the gazebo was packed!
There were like 50 people there to honor you! We couldn't all fit in the gazebo at once haha. Your mom was there too.
We took turns talking about you. Telling each other stories that we loved about you. There were so many good ones. People started crying, saying the "flickering of the light was a sign that you were there" and some nonsense. Maybe you were, but I think you would've rolled your eyes at how corny it was.
So many people loved you. Even just people who saw you everyday n noticed you were gone. I loved you. Even when you moved schools. Even when we stopped talking, I still cared. I wore that bracelet you gave me every single day until it couldn't hold itself together.
When it was my turn to talk I couldn't think of what to say. I didn't feel like I deserved to. Honestly, Anika and her mom were there. It was really awkward considering all the drama, but in that moment it didn't really matter.
We both lost a friend, and that mattered more than whatever bullshit happened between us (it was my fault though). She gave me a hug after everyone left and it was nice. I'm sure that would've made you happy. It's just crushing it took you dying for us to make amends.
Even besides Anika, I wasn't even sure what I was to you. I honestly kept thinking we'd go to the fair once we graduated. When it came down to it, Sidney was the one who told me. It was so strange to me.
These people I knew and who barely knew you were sobbing. But no one asked how I was? It was like no one knew that I knew you. But I did!
You were the only one I was still friends with. The only one. And I treasured you. And you were gone.
When it came down to my turn, I didn't have anything to say because I frankly had no idea whether what I felt was even true. Whether I was deluding myself.
That I was just some kid you saw every now n then. But you were my damn best friend. You, Anika, Thayne, Natalie, all of you were my best friends. And I lost all of them, except you, and then I truly lost you.
I didn't have friends that I got to go trick or treating with. Not until I met you guys. You gave me a place to exist, a place to be comfortable.
I was silent before because I was scared that people would accuse me of not knowing you. I was scared because I couldn't talk out loud in front of them. But I can talk now. 5, almost 6 years since you died I can tell you how I feel.
I wish I knew you again. I wish you were here again.
I started smoking weed in college. I wish we got to smoke together. Y'know, all those times I said no in high school, it wasn't bc of you. I was waiting. I wanted to do it when we were older. I just wish I could've known that I wouldn't get the chance to.
You'd love how I've grown up. I wish I could tell you. Tell you about the kinks I'm into, tell you how I think I'm polyamorous. Which I know you'd like. I remember you'd always tell me about your ot3's n that those were your preferred.
I still remember the grin you'd have when you'd talk about gay stuff n yaoi. I remember the shock you n Anika had when I told you I already watched the yaoi you suggested. It was honestly one of the best moments of my life!
I remember your enthusiasm and your strength. The way you'd defend your friends and stick up for them. The way you'd help me out when no one else would.
But I also remember how much you hurt. I remember hearing people who just fucking hated you and I had no clue why. I wish they had been kinder to you. I wish I had known how much you needed help.
I thought you were stronger, that you could tough it out. But you couldn't. I honestly don't think you wanted to kill yourself. I think most people don't want to, they just let themselves get to a point in which they can't stop it. They've either stepped too far off to jump back, squeezed to hard on the trigger, or tied it just too tightly to get it undone. I'm sure you wanted to live, to see me again.
Since you died Ive been living with so much depression. Ive wanted to die so fucking badly. To see you again. It hurts. I've tied ropes around my neck, put razors to my skin, hell I even carved a sliver of my wrist away. But I never let myself go to far. Never put myself in a situation where I can let myself go too far.
And it's cuz I can't do to others what you did to me. To us. To everyone at that gazebo who was aching and crying because of the loss. We fucking loved you. We cared about you. We sobbed until we couldn't, and by fucking god we shouldve done that all while you were alive but sweet fuck I had no idea you would ever go that far.
Were you high when you died? Was it the weed that gave you the courage, or sap you of the sanity? Were you thinking clearly as you did it? Knowing what would happen?
All I can do is hope you weren't but fuck I don't know. You told me we would go to the carnival again. I never heard from you the year after, so I assumed we'd go the next year. Was it me? Was I too late? Should I have reached out?
The worst part of it all is that I know now how you felt. I can feel it in my soul. I hate myself so fucking much sometimes that I can't survive with that pain.
I hate myself for being a loser in college and ignoring my cool roommates bc I was scared they wouldn't like me bc they were the coolest people I ever met. I hate myself for not being able to tell anyone how much I hurt, bc I don't want them to hurt from it too.
This is agony. I hate myself so much, but I can't tell people out of fear that my depression will rub off on them, or turn them away from me.
I'm scared that when I tell them that "I feel so alone sometimes that I want to curl up into a ball and lay there for hours n block the world out" all they'll hear is a cry for attention. Wanting attention isn't a bad thing, but everyone treats it like it is.
I wish I could tell you how much I'm hurting. I wish I could tell you that I feel like I'm following in your footsteps. I wish you could break me out of my loop, to knock sense into me. But you're not alive to.
And if there's one thing I learned when you died, it's that people might care about you, but they won't care enough to say it until you kill yourself. But I need it. I need to hear that stuff. That I'm fine. That people like me and want to be my friend. I'm scared that I'm never going to make any more friends.
I went to college and major in Psychology so I could help keep people from killing themselves. You were my inspiration. The thing that drove me to it. And I am grateful, even if the means was horrible.
But now I think it might have been a mistake. I talk to people and they look at me like I'm an alien. Like I can't talk to them. People somehow expect all psychology people to know how to talk like therapists, so it I ever bring up something I learned people are always like "well uh dipshit if you knew psychology youd know there are better ways to talk about" like okay fucker 1st it I said it that way you'd be more suspicious and 2nd WHY IM NOT YOUR THERAPIST. Okay
I never went to a party in college. I never saw anything. I saw Sylvie though. I think you knew her cuz she was friends with Sidney but she kinda just ignored me. She said she'd text me so we could smoke together sometime since it was my last quarter... but she didn't :(
Maybe I just don't deserve friends. And frankly with the way I smoke and the way my depression is, I doubt I'd make a good therapist. I'd like to do research tho! It's just. Every time I feel decent about my life something comes up and makes me just hate myself.
Sometimes it's hot men reminding me what I'm not. Sometimes it's my friend Patrick reminding me that not only do I have no friends from college, but I also don't have any kink friends from events bc I'm too anxious to go there.
My life feels duct taped together, and though I'm glad with what I did - I'm happy where I got to go to college n that I have an awesome boyfriend - but I'm constantly reminded that all that I've accomplished is just the bare minimum. I should've done so much more. I'm 23 already. It feels like once I finally find my voice I'll be too old for people to care about.
I wish I had friends to talk to like I did with you :( I just wanna go hang out with people who smoke weed. Talk to them about hating myself. Be genuine n honest. Someone who knows how I feel. But idk. I don't think there's anyone out there who'd wanna talk to me about this stuff.
I just. My life feels duct taped together. I don't think I ever told you this, but my dad had dimentia. I should've :( you weren't doing good after your dad died. I was selfish. I figured bc I was fine with my dad leaving my life you'd be fine with yours. But you weren't. N I was probably one of the few people that could relate. N I just never told you what happened.
I wish I could've found someone in college. A friend. To take me to cool parts of the forest, show me where to smoke weed. Talk to me about life, n all the cool parts of the world. Discuss how agonizing it is to exist, n the pains of depression. N the joys of being queer n existing. I just need something like that again.
Something. But I don't think it'll ever happen. Tried making friends with a boy named Johny but he was super closeted n like even when I was graduating he barely wanted to hang out n when we did hed just pretend he didn't know me :(
I miss my trans roommates. They were sick. You would've loved em. Had some of the best styles I've ever seen. It's funny like on the one hand I adore like sapphic style but on the other I was sexually abused by a woman so my view of womanhood is warped. So like. Any desire for womanhood would have been scrapped by it. But still it's cool. Idk what I'm talking about anymore. I'm so confused. I barely talked to em when I was there anyways so it's not like I really deserve to hear from em again..
I miss you so much. I wish I had someone to talk to like you again :(
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Y'ALLLLL
The fucking dream I just had đ
My extended family on my mom's side gets together to go eat at thus super expensive restaurant for some reason
During our dinner 50 Cent walks in with his wife/partner idk - it had nothing to do with the plot
And I'm the only one under 60 being normal about it
Then my mom and my aunt volunteer me for something that I don't even quite understand and I'm asked to give them a list of 10 celebrities
I don't remember my list but I give it to them and it's revealed that I'm gonna go on like a reality show. And go on dates with 3 of the celebrities on the list and I'm like wtf but okay
TURNS OUT I gave them the list of celebrities of all genders but they choose 3 cis men đ
I knew the first 2 but the last guy was a surprise (I hope it was Danny)
The first one I found out about was Bill Hader but he was gonna be the 2nd date
DO YOU WANNA FUCKING KNOW WHO WAS THE FIRST DATE?!?
Fucking Esai đ
They shot a getting ready segment with him and I didn't know he was the first date yet but my aunt was watching the segment and I heard his voice that I unfortunately know too well and looked at the screen to see him
And I immediately go "no fuck that"
During the segment, he was talking about being excited for the date and excited to see me again which like wtf I guess we had already met or knew each other
And I just remember telling my mom and my aunt that I'm not gonna go on a date with him and that I want out of this reality show
But my mom and my aunt were like "you already agreed and we signed the contracts you can't back out now"
And I'm like freaking the fuck out because how am I, a trans person, gonna go on a date on TV with a fucker who is openly transphobic?
So I forced myself to wake up beforehand đ
I FUCKING REFUSE
But y'all the way that getting ready segment got my đ± feeling some type of way đ©
I HATE IT
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Bit of a self-indulgent headcanon for myself.
I think Tucker is asexual.
In the show, Tucker is constantly flirting, seemingly girl-crazy, always bemoaning his dating options. But, as we see with Ember's first appearance, he does actually have some options to date girls. At the end of the episode, he has girls crushing on him. But, nothing comes of that. And I know that that is mostly because the series is set up so that the status quo doesn't change from episode to episode. So, for "comedic purposes" Tucker cannot actually have a girlfriend because he is shallow, but I hate that. I like Tucker and I don't want him to be shallow.
So I am ignoring the story structure in favor of my own self indulgence.
When I was in high school, I didn't know I was asexual. I hadn't heard the term. But I knew that all my friends were dating, and I didn't want to feel like a loser. So, what did I do? I overcompensated. I posted thirsty posts on my tumblr (please don't look those up, I hope I deleted them). I would be loud about actors I thought were "hot". I didn't do it all the time because, honestly? It was boring. But I did it enough to try and fit in.
So, as an adult when I re-watched Danny Phantom, my instant read of Tucker's actions was "Ah yes, the child is Ace. He is trying to fit in."
So yeah, Ace Tucker. He might be Aro, he might not be. He could still be any romantic orientation. Idk. But in my head, the boy is Ace.
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Responses from the Opera Screencaps Captioning Quiz
Hello, everyone, and thank you for taking my quiz! I had SO MUCH fun reading your captions-- there were several times I literally started crying from laughing so hard at the amazingness of your work! With that in mind, the captions (which I will continue to add onto as more people take it):
(also, thank you to @dichterfuerstinâ for translating the German captions I got)
originally taken from: the Wiener Staatsoperâs 2020 production of Wolfgang Amadeus Mozartâs Die EntfĂŒhrung aus dem Serail, featuring Regula MĂŒhlemann (center) as Blonde, Michael Laurenz (right) as Pedrillo, and an unnamed extra (left) as the Grim Reaper
Responses:
(Backstage warm-up) âok so someone dropped the pulseâ
me and my friends watching the fire burn after doing arson
Introducing the polycule to the parents
*boom* ... did...you guys hear that too?
Ma Signor !
Knight in whinging armour gone wrong, look at how he holds the egg. Polyamory with weird knight and death.
the father, son and the holy ghost are very gay
the gays meeting for brunch, 2021, colorized
chicken lady forces death and a very flamboyantly homosexual anthropomorphized pink bird to be parents of her egg (they dont want to be)
Thatâs just me and my friends on our night out (before covid rip)-- closest
A Good Friday night
good omens (2019)
["the pocket guide to boy/girl/mischief" meme] who's the boy and who's the mischief though????
Papageno and Papagena take their first-born egg trick-or-treating
Angry Birds - The Musical. A pig stole an egg and the bird unites with death to take revenge.
I love my bird wife
Someone got murdered during the funky chicken dance
throuple murders child and steals sibling of said child
When you and your friends have widely different tastes in literature
angel leading twink to his rightful place (hell)
draco malfoy from a very potter musical and a death eater are very much in the wrong show
What have I gotten myself into
Mlm/wlw solidarity but Iâm not telling who is who
A woman stands with a pink dipshit with an egg and a reaper.
A bird-couple makes a pact with Death, sacrificing their first-born bird-child in order to bring good luck upon their unborn bird-baby
There are three types of people on Halloween:
Uh oh, I donât think the mother hen is very happy about this...
oh god, theyâve invented seussical. Itâs too early!
gay brunch
Three little maids from school are we
guys maybe if we dress gay enough we can distract everyone from the dead flapper bee in the back
those three killed a duck for her egg and are facing the conswquences.
Duck has egg with human, shocked and upset due to biological impossibility
When you bout to make a banging omelet so you invite your fellow queers
"No mortal man could pass that egg, but heaven shall repair your rectum."
originally taken from: the Salzburg Festivalâs 2007 production of Hector Berliozâs Benvenuto Cellini, featuring Maija Kovalevska (left) as Teresa Balducci, Laurent Naouri (center, in chimney) as Fieramosca, and Burkhard Fritz (right) as Benvenuto Cellini
Responses:
âIn this same interlude it doth befall That I, one Snout by name, present a wall; And such a wall, as I would have you think, That had in it a crannied hole or chink, Through which the lovers, Pyramus and Thisby, Did whisper often very secretly. This loam, this rough-cast and this stone doth show That I am that same wall; the truth is so: And this the cranny is, right and sinister, Through which the fearful lovers are to whisper.â - a midsummer nightâs dream, act v scene 1
"ah yes a prime specimen. see here, right in this box is our one of a kind hob goblin that can be all yours for the low low price of your soul"
what, YOU don't have a special eavesdropping chimney window?
HĂ€nsel und Gretel plotting against the witch
man takes a wrong turn and ends up in a chimney, catches his girlfriend cheating-- closest
when you end up third wheeling the straight couple
lady cheats on her leather jacket wearing scummy boyfriend and when he unexpectedly comes home she hides the lover in the chimney
A straight girl and her gay best friend gossip about stuff idk
Idk Shakespeare?
experimental couples therapy feat. the chimney mf from mary poppins
Area Couple Inadvertently Traps Santa-in-Training in Chimney as they Attempt Rooftop Flirting
Landlords laugh over student renter's misfortune
I never asked for this
Ay yo lil mama lemme whisper in your ear
voyeurist listens to sandy and Danny from grease
Psssst! Did you hear about Susan? You wonât believe it!
lady and the tramp meets beauty and the beast?
human trafficking
And for just $30 you too could have your own tiny brick cage!
Psst Iâm wearing assless chaps under this dress
A couple tortures a man in a box.
It's all fun and games being stuck in a chimney until your greasy uncle steals your crush from right above you-- okay ngl this could actually be a great Don Pasquale concept
Taking eavesdropping to the next level
Will you two stop being lovey dovey and let me out? SUMMER LOVIN, HAPPENED SO FASTâÂ
overhearing how people talk about you when they think they're alone puts you in the shithouseÂ
Does he know we can see him?
dear god, i am so fucking hungry, yall please just do whatever heterosexuals do so i can go eat a popsicleÂ
the human version of the trash man from sesame street is realizing that those two are going to fuck on his trash canÂ
Tmw you capture an angry short dude and start trashtalking him where he can hearÂ
Omg what if we kissed but we actually kissed the lil goblin man under us
"Remember, don't feed him after midnight"
originally taken from: the ThĂ©Ăątre de Capitole du Toulouseâs 2017 staging of Giacomo Meyerbeerâs Le prophĂšte, featuring Leonardo Estevez (right, on fake horse) as Le Comte dâOberthal
Responses:
âWhen I said we needed to drain the swamp I didnât think there were people actually living thereâ
horse? what horse? no sir i dont know what horse youre referring to.
definitely don't have a napoleon complex going on
King stole La Scalaâs Lohengrin set
king breaks all his horses, has to use statue dragged by servants as transportation because heâs too kingly too walk
Emperor Söder and his subjects on a carnival procession
man on horse makes a big deal out of being on a horse
Thatâs not Zeffirelli because the horse is not alive
Who the fuck put a horse on the stage
isn't this that picture of napoleon on the horse
Area Count Thinks Citizens will be Intimidated by his Extremely Fake-looking Horse Statue-- closest
Everyone wants their turn on the giant plaster horse. Police are there to make sure everyone waits their turn.
Night out with the lads
Local royalty horrified at the state of his own damn kingdom
gay army fights different gay aesthetics-- hi author how does it feel to be the funniest fucking person on this quiz
Well at least I LOOK badass
ceasar if he hadn't gotten stabbed (colourised)
some soldiers jumped out of my kindergarten fairytale collection book to burn the don carlos flemish deputies at the stake
Itâs just a model
Is that how you feel pulling up in your Honda Civic, Madge?
Someone rides a horse statue in public.
Just a normal party with the bros.
what is this, some kind of crossover episode?Â
Terribly sorry for all the fuss, itâs just, that is, my horse is afraid of neck ruffles. Iâve tried to talk to him about it, but heâsâwhoaaa thereâhe said he was a french courtier in a past life and heâs allergic to English fashionÂ
Horse seller, listen to me! I am riding into battle. I need your strongest horse. - We have horses at home. - The horses at home:Â
All hail Incitatus the kingÂ
we are not ripping off shakespeareâs henry viii. what the fuck. this is about lenny xi you uncultured swine, go drown in a pit of your own fartsÂ
oh god is that hamiltonÂ
Guy Removed From Art Museum For Sitting On Statue, more at elevenÂ
Gay <3
Officer: This horse... is a virgin! Crowd: *cheers*
originally taken from: the Parma Verdi Festivalâs 2017 staging of Giuseppe Verdiâs Stiffelio, featuring Maria Katzarava (left) as Lina and Luciano Ganci (right) as Stiffelio
Responses:
That One kid in class
its a mEntAL BreAkDowN *final countdown but kazoo*
*record scratch* yeah, that's me. you're probably wondering how I got here-- closest
Dad keeps monologuing, teenager is done
left: all of my concerned friends, right: my emo ass having a very public mental breakdown
the demons in the corner of my room when im just trying to sleep
lady gets mansplained to (do i need to say more, we've all been there)
Itâs probably an area baritone telling off an area soprano-- sorry; itâs a tenor. soprano is right though.
That was a fake horse in the last photo right?
child comes out as gay to father at a particularly bad time
dissociation solves everything
I can't believe it's not butter
Honey we talked about this
My sleep paralysis demon is Crowley from supernatural
child has nightmare of boring job
When you start dating a singer but he wonât stop practicing at night
just an average day in a hetero marriage
what do i do my wife's having period cramps again
Stop having an existential crisis. Itâs time to sing!
âNo son of mine will kin Gomez Addams under MY roofâ
Crowley stares into space while a teen has post nut clarity.
When he wont stop reciting jordan peterson monologues!!
Do you realize how effed you are?
Ugh, not this lecture again! Dadâs Practicing For His Experimental Indie Band AgainÂ
asking your parents for help with your own personal situation and them just ranting off about what they went through instead of helping in any wayÂ
Will he shut up already!
no one tell him heâs yelling in the wrong direction, no one tell him plnsbdjddhdjÂ
this kid is tired of his dad listening to rush limbaugh (a man who claimed to be pro life but died anyway)Â
Me internally vs externallyÂ
Daddy issues
originally taken from: the Grand ThĂ©Ăątre de GenĂšveâs 2020 staging of Giacomo Meyerbeerâs Les Huguenots, featuring several chorus members
Responses:
Itâs the deadly eye Of Poogley-pie. Look away, look away, As you walk by, âCause whoever looks right at it Surely will die. Itâs a good thing you didnât ⊠You did? ⊠Good-bye. - shel Silverstein
why the fuckith? my good sir, i beg of you to put your pants back on
I hate this itchy hat
Titanic Extras hear that they have to do extra hours
people waiting to board the titanic watch someone fall off the plank
pov: youâre a time traveler
guy in the flatcap is embarrassed by patriotism and pathos
No idea. For some reason Le Marseillaise comes to mind
Is this from Harry Potter?
disneyland main street usa workers on strike
local tries to hide behind Newsies cap to avoid unpleasant but inevitable conversations. meanwhile, some very fashionable ladies look on.
"Thank fuck, 2020 was just a dream after all"
âWe gather here today because this bitch got exactly what she deservedâ âheaven!â âStfu Stephanie sheâs going to hell and we all know itâ-- not quite but this basically happens later on in the opera (and act) so yeah (except the person in question very much Did Not Deserve It)
dc movie filter on bridgerton
america?
looks like my history teacher paused the prohibition documentary again
Who still wears page boy hats bro?
Coming out to a room of people who Already Knew That
Bitches are relieved at some party.
Several drunk people exiting getting off the subway attempting to seem sober and rational but realizing they have somehow lost all of their possessions
How tf do I act natural in this situation-- closest
âdo you think any of them noticed that I donât know the pledge of allegianceâÂ
It's too fucking hot outside for this outfitÂ
?
when hyyh yoonkook ending just hits differentÂ
pedestrians watch in horror as the triangle shirtwaist factory burns and the workers throw themselves out of the windows from a dozen stories upÂ
Starting the pledge of allegiance be likeÂ
He's having a heart attack oh no oh god oh fuck
originally taken from: if I remember correctly, the Semperoper Dresdenâs 2018 semi-staging of Johann Strauss IIâs Die Fledermaus, with Jonas Kaufmann as Gabriel von Eisenstein
Responses:
âWilliam Shakespeare wrote: "To thine own self be true And it must follow, as the night the day Thou canst not then be false to any man" I believe this wise statement best applies to a woman A blonde woman Over the past three years she taught me And showed us all That being true to yourself never goes out of style Ladies and gentlemen Our valedictorian: Elle Woods!â - legally blonde the musical
eat ass, suck a dick, and sell drugs
woooooorrrrd
Finally Jonas has graduated! Itâs about time, considering heâs an international star.
what my professors think they look like
Prof. Dr. Dr. When someone tells him there are more than two genders
'and since you've now graduated high school, you'll be entering college etc. blablabla' .........meanwhile, there's a whole row of graduates daring each other to chug the cheap vodka one of them has brought in gallons (yes that happened at my graduation, lol)
Jonas darling baby <3-- canât argue with that
I just realized I have no idea what the actual fuck happens in an opera
ok this one is just what jonas kaufmann always wears you can't fool me.
"as valedictorian i will share with you the importance of loving the floor"
"Yes, mother, my art degree will make me money!"
Graduation speakers are out, singers are in
Senior year takes a new meaninbg
mansplainer professor explains the concept of feminism to women
Your Prof when you finally turn in that missing assignment be like
younger boris johnson (derogatory)
jonas kaufmann retires from opera and takes up motivational speaking
What a fine graduation evening weâre having today
-70 points for slytherin you all have no swag
A man with a college hat sings.
An obviously greying actor trying to play a university student in a low-budget porn parody
How it feels to graduate high school after being held back for years
East High is a place where teachers encouraged us to break the status quo and define ourselves as we choose. Where a jock can cook up a mean crÚme brûlée, and a brainiac can break it down on the dance floor-
I may not have been "cool" in high school, but in ten years you will all be working for me!
I finally got my GED!
that one guy in ur intro to cultural anthropology class who mansplains to the professor somehow fucking graduated
he;s just graduating and taking his speech too serously idk
Graduation speeches with that one dude who got held back 3 times
Smrt
originally taken from: the Metropolitan Operaâs 2011 staging of Gioachino Rossiniâs Le Comte Ory with Joyce DiDonato (left) as Isolier, Diana Damrau (center) as Countess AdĂšle, and Juan Diego Florez (right) as Le Comte Ory (disguised as a hermit)
Responses:
There is something very [disturbing grunts] About polyamorous couples - polyamorous, Chris Fleming
jinkies
femme fatale (including to herself)
Iâll have a threesome soon !
Hot guy walks by, everyone swoons.
thirdwheeling friend does not realize the other two are having sex
When your girlfriend had âjust two beersâ again
jesus is exasperated about having to drag the two ladies towards doing what he needs them to do instead of purple dramatically declaring suicidal intent over the smallest trivial matters and red being equally dramatic about declaring that it's not the way! stay alive! i love you!!
The throuple is thriving
Get off the milf
orgy
my last three braincells because im a horny slut
countess receives too much love and is confused on how to react
Rasputin's lesser known romp with a much older czarina of russia
Woman's soul leaves body
Jesus and co. are worried after another woman gets pregnant without having sex
bisexual looks at photos of celebrity couples
When you go to the party to socialize with new people but your weirdo friend group starts getting clingy
Jesus cumming
one of those weird church christmas pageants but everybody's drunk
What have I done
Hozier??????????
Jesus assfucks some purple lady being hugged.
This time, the chick IS the magnet
An affair/threesome gone awry (2019 colorized)
What do you mean they canceled GLOW?
âI TOLD you it was cashmere!â
Are you wearing the - - The Gucci dress? Yes I am.
It's not what it looks like!
jesus is fucking that one cheerleader who grew up to be a suburban mom with one (1) super cool dress she stole from her kid who is desperately hugging her middle begging for it back because the spring fling is coming up and jason might actually make eye contact with her for more than three seconds.
jesus and mary magdaline and some other bitch
Iâm at a bar and these drunk girls are flirting with me, do I lOOK GAY?!
Shrek 5, jesus's return
c. 2025 First attempt of an Officer and his Wife with a Handmaiden (colourized)
just about all of these are close lol
originally taken from: the Bolshoi Theaterâs 1993 staging of Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovskyâs The Maid of OrlĂ©ans, featuring Nina Rautio (left) as Joan of Arc and Vyacheslav Pochapsky (right) as Thibaut dâArc
Responses:
Donât look, Iâm still pooping
yall, the audacity of this man. he fuckin talked to me
*i can't even tell you how wrong you are* *it would be insulting to ME*-- closest
Cospeto!
âNo Iâm not talking to you, you keep cracking bad jokes!â - âBut I got another!â
when youâre mad at him but he says heâll buy you food if you cheer up
When Iâm wallowing in self-pity but my friends wonât comfort me
right: wanna fuck ;) left: yeah, fuck OFF lmao
Her face is screaming âdonât tell me what to doâ
Yeah I got nothing
gay man tries to hit on a lesbian bc he thinks she's a twink. she's not amused but she's watching this happen anyway
me tired of MET's bullshit and them organising a Netrebko, known blackface apologist, a recital during Black History Month. (sorry im still fucking salty lol)
"stop smiling at me like that I'm trying to pout over here"
"I got fleas, you got fleas... wanna fuck?"
I have the best idea!
Haha nooooo donât hit me with that bat youâre so sexxyy
lesbian is bothered by dilf
Me trying to flirt
if call me by your name was hetero and set in america
how many more dad jokes can i take before i explode
So. Youâve gotten yourself in a little pickle again.
What if we fought in the Russian revolution together âš???????... unless??
Two people flirt in a poor place of town/
"If you ask me what I've got under this dirty, shapeless tunic one more time I swear to god I will kick your rotting teeth in"
You look like ur gonna kill me but ok
Really? You again?
Okay, Iâve been sitting here for 20 minutes, do you think itâs safe toâoh god, heâs still there.
Have you seen Godot?
she is tired of everyoneâs shit. she has done so many derivatives it physically pains her to see a variable. dont test her. ur icarus rn.
idk pick better pictures-- I HAVE DIED THE SHEER AUDACITY AND HUBRIS I LOVE THIS
200% done with your crapÂ
Homeless man has fucking legs of steel n is gonna show off his Russian dance moves
originally taken from: the ThĂ©Ăątre de Capitole du Toulouseâs 2019 staging of Paul Dukasâ Ariane et Barbe-bleue, featuring Sophie Koch (right) as Ariane and I donât remember who the person on the left is rip me
Responses:
The knight who wore this into battle sure was swaggy
dear god its hiddeous
Capitalism
Knight in shining armour gone even more wrong.
ghost contemplates the safety of spiky motorcycle helmet
âStop! He feels bullied!â
'this is my newest take for jesus's crucifixion crown ...... what do you mean they already put him up'
Thatâs probably a really expensive magic helmet idk. IDK-- closest
Omg I love the adventure zone!
minesweeper (windows xp)
"Okay whatever you do don't touch the shiny spiky ball" "It's so shiny I wanna touch it"
Taking down the trash way too late
IT'S NOT A PHASE MOM
Darth Vader got stuck in the freezer.... again. Leia isnât happy
Star Wars 2030
âAnd here is the very latest in motorcycle helmet trendsâ âLook, I only came to the mall for a pair of socks â
futuristic kkk
long-suffering jewelry store attendant really wants to retire
Put it down put it down put it down
âHmm no you should see a doctor about thatâ
A weird ass crown is presented
The creation of sars-cov-2: an experimental Eurotrance nightclub art piece gone horribly wrong
How it feels to want something that u cant have
AND WE WILL CALL ITâSPIKE MAN actually do you think thatâs too obvious?? Because of theâyeah, because of the spikes?? See, thatâs what Iâm worried about. I want it to be SCARY
I know it's risky but... lube me up
?
use the force luke.
that is a weird fleshlight
When you get an ugly gift and need to find a way to get rid of it, so your family member/friend offers to smash it
Touch the orb
originally taken from: the Opera Vlaanderenâs 2019 staging of Fromental HalĂ©vyâs La Juive, with Nicole Chevalier (left, with bottle) as Princess Eudoxie, Enea Scala (center, under table) as Prince LĂ©opold, and Roy Cornelius Smith (right) as ĂlĂ©azar
Responses:
When no one comes to your birthday party :(
fantastic, day 487 of mischief and they have yet to find my masterful hiding spot
i really wonder who he thinks he's playing footsie with
Marriage crisis. Reason sits under the table-- closest but not in the way you think (after all, the man under the table IS a tenor).
the last supper afterparty after jesus left
When you order the last supper on wish
espionage at the Politischer Rosenmontag
Probably the wrong opera but is that Leporello under the table
Now THIS is a Good Friday night
this was every birthday party i went to between the ages of 5 and 11
that awkward moment when you drop your fork under the table but when you re-emerge everyone else has left except one drunk lady and the guy trying to deal with her
After the last supper
Tfw you arrive to the dinner party too early and have to hide until a more fashionable hour
When the cishets arenât home
waiter hides from customers
Nobody: My dog every time Iâm eating:
what's left of the homies Jesus had dinner with
university chem lab experiment gone terribly wrong
Iâve been under the table FOR 30 MINUTES
Set your friends up by tossing them off under the table, theyâll think itâs each other n fall in luv
Someone hids under a table
"You're about to see an surreptitious-under-the-table-dick-sucking master at work"
5 yr old me trying to eat the desert under the table without my parents finding out be like:
They never invite me to their parties!
Just another girlâs night in
Oops! Didnât notice you the table.
dionysus - bts (2019, colorized)
just a normal episode of eric andre (eric is the one under the table)
Just a normal day with the boys
Thievery
originally taken from: the ThĂ©Ăątre de Capitole du Toulouseâs 2017 staging of Giacomo Meyerbeerâs Le prophĂšte, featuring Kate Aldrich (left, surrounded by women in white) as FidĂšs and John Osborn (center, looking like a Jesus doppelganger) as Jean de Leyde
Responses:
Hold up, is that Eggman above Jesus?
holy disco
Looks like TannhÀuser. Our lord and saviour Richard Wagner. Now I need to be saved from that.
catholicism
me defending pineapple on pizza (THANK YOU)
jesus but hes about to be abducted by the alien ufo above him
Emmmmmmm Heaven? Idk
Lord of the rings?
ewww christianity gross
"behold, I am Important"
"Seriously?? It's not ACTUALLY pyjama day? Fuck you guys!"
Jesus at the Disco
Jesus Finds The Molerat People Who Live Under Bethlehem
disco is heaven
Want to join my new religion?
the kkk
church christmas pageant where everyone's sober but it's based on the director's fever dream
Am I the only one who sees the giant demon? Just me? Okay...
âOh god I think Iâm starting my periodâ
A party is held with a priest in the middle
"Let's get this secret Vatican sex party rolling!"
The new avengers endgame set is looking great!!
You know, guys, I try not to be a bother but...I canât help but feel like I missed a dress code memo for this wedding??? Itâs cocktail, right??â
Jesus visits Hogwarts
I must really stink if no one will even come close to me
the extra ass funeral i DESERVE
star wars life day
A cult at itâs best-- closest
Shrek 5, Jesus is still there I guess
originally taken from: the Royal Opera House, Covent Gardenâs 2013 staging of Giuseppe Verdiâs Les vĂȘpres siciliennes, featuring Bryan Hymel (left, standing) as Henri, Lianna Haroutounian (center, kneeling in the black gown) as Duchess HĂ©lĂšne, and Erwin Schrott (kneeling to her right) as Jean Procida
Responses:
When the directorâs like âgreat rehearsal guys, just a few notes before I let you goâ but itâs already 9:13 and your momâs waiting in the parking lot
loyalist of subjects
bow before your queen
They forgot to take down the stage boxes after the Vienna opera ball but the show must go on.
somebody forgot to book chairs for this funeral
Me sharing Godâs (Hayley koyoko) word on the discord server
mass execution bc the oboe solo sucked ass-- closest
Thatâs too many black suits I canât see shit
I canât even tell whatâs going on here
8th grade school assembly about how it's uncool to shit on the walls at school
let's all get fancy so we can go to the opera and sit on the stage (idk this one's hard lol)
"Yes i am a time traveller, now don't freak out"
Tfw you forget to pay your lighting bills
White guys make decisions that will benefit them and screw someone thatâs not a white guy over-- OUCH but that is too real (although not really in context here)
dead man gives speech at his own funeral
brotus and the boys ??? last meeting before the stabbing
high society social function ends in mass murder-- right opera, wrong scene
Someone walks into the talent show stage with a dog
Black-dressed bitches worship a man.
Worst school assembly of all time
POV:You're the window in the classroom and someone said "its snowing"
When the conductor shows up fashionably late to the orchestra concert
That's what you get for choosing the cheapest ticket option, get back in the mud where you belong
?
theyre just trying to jump into a grave at a funeral leabe them alone this is normal
oh my god he really whipped his dick out in front of everyone, this is just like in 1776 guys, except some women are actually in the room this time,
A funeral, stop wearing so much black
I want to slap their bald heads like rice
originally taken from: the Teatro Real Madridâs 2018 staging of Gaetano Donizettiâs Lucia di Lammermoor, featuring Roberto Tagliavini (right) as Raimondo
Responses:
Crowd âhaha!! Looks like someone missed the all-black memo!! Now itâs laugh-in-your-face time! / Guy on the floor (whispering to guy against wall): go, save yourself! Iâll hold them off...â
if i leave now i wont be a witness and can tell the police i had no idea
it was the best of times, it was the worst of times
Guy in the back pretends to help but is to far away to even know whatâs going on.
priest walks in on beginning of an orgy, contemplated joining but is too scared-
when someone brings up capitalism but youâre just trying to play minecraft
lol lets trample this guy while the judge isnt looking
Again. Too many black costumes
Loved this Dostoevsky novel
i would know if opera directors were more creative with clothing choices ngl
me on parties lol
"imma just sneak out of here while everyone else is distracted"
"Where did he get this flooring!? Amazing!"
Everyone act normal!
The tell tale heart but they got REALLY drunk
man tposes to ward off vampires after being caught undercover
boys ???? night
the priest really shouldn't have visited the insane asylum-- closest
Heâs FINE everyoneâs been hit by a car before
Something happens in a room.
Perks of being a wallflower
There's always that one person in the fight whos trying not to get involved when they really wanna
Oh good, theyâre all posing for a Rembrandt painting, I can just sneeeeaaak out the back here...
The gamer livestreaming Resident Evil + everyone watching the stream ? waiting for him to open the door just knowing it will trigger a chase scene
Quick!
the guy t posing in the back is regretting his every decision.-- also accurate
the us senate jumps ted cruz, some other wack ass gop senator is trying to sneak away
...I spoke too soon, however this is a James Bond mission
Queers help fellow queer do math but it's a struggle
#opera#opera tag#results#screencaps#captions#caption#caption this#caption contest#this seems to have gone over well and I am Pleased
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what have I created?
idk if yall like this, but they just exist not i guess :/
ok the the first one is Royalty AU
first things first, when I say Royalty AU, I don't mean the classic shit we've all become accustomed to. Im talking about the good old Chinese royalty! And I want to emphasize that these guys will/should be dressed in century appropriate attire. As someone thats read a handful of 'marinette, princess of china' fics from the ML Fandom, I've noticed a common trend. Marinette wouldn't be in the culturally appropriate clothes, always ballgowns. Not that there's something wrong with it, its just most of if not all these fic are set in China, so I'd expect Chinese royalty to dress as THERE dress code calls for. And since this AU takes place far in the past like, it won't make sense for any of the characters to be in royal clothing that wasn't from there region. I'm not trying to white knight/gatekeeping. Im Guyanese not Chinese. But since JTTW and Monkie Kid take place in China, it's only right. In my opinion that it. You don't have to outright agree with me.
With out of the way, it's time for that good old AU crack
- Wukong is the king of the Flower Fruit kingdom(or a different one if you'd like, again I'm only familiar with what western culture has taught me, but I'll try my hardest)Â
- heâs single but rumor has it he used to/still is dating the Vigilante/thief The Six Eared Macaque
- *chants ShadowPeach violently*Â
- no one know whether it true or not
- On of his wanders around the kingdom he finds an abandoned baby in a basket.Â
- and no shit sherlock it's fucking baby XiaotianÂ
- I think we all know where this is going because i'm a simp for Monkey Dad & Monkie Son shenanigans
- Xiaotian becomes prince
Shit, ill be referring to Xiaotian as Mk from now on, I mentioned this before in a fic I wrote for lmk that Mk's a nickname for Xiaotian for some reason- wait i don't have to explain my self to you people!
- Sun loves his son
- MK is treated differently by staff and others because he's not blood related to the king
- no one mistreats MK per say, because there King loved his adopted son, but words are said behind his back
- Sometimes MK hears whatâs said, and he feels as if he won't live up to his dadâs legacy.
- He meets Mei during a festival
- Mei is from a noble family, that wouldn't mind if they got a connection into the royal family.
- but it becomes hella clear to Meiâs family very fast that the two are just friends, and will always will be. but hey there daughter is bffs with the prince so that's a plus.   Â
_
- the Demon Bull Family is rules a kingdom as well, I dont/am not creative enough to think of a name I leave that to you.
- It's a common misconception that DBK is a tyrant, when heâs not.Â
- most of the time...
-Â they have been at war with the Monkey King for some time now and settled for a peace agreement.
- that agreement being there sons to marry
- oooo original i know
- MK and Red Son are roughly the same age, Mk being 20 and RS 22
- RS is revolted/disgusted at the idea of being wed to the Monkey Kings child, even more so when he realizes MK is adopted,
- but, that all changes the second he meets MK while he meets him by accident when he gets kinda lost in the palace when he and his parents go to discuss the arrangements.
- the second he looks at MK, he's instantly in love. MK less so, he's nervous and honestly kinda bummed he's not marrying someone he loves but it's for the good of his ppl, and he'll do anything for them.
- RS isn't even aware that MK is Suns adopted son until MK walks him back to the meeting room.
"Oh There you are MK! I was about to have a servant go fetch you!" Sun Wukong says, gesturing for his boy to come sit with him.
"S-sorry for keeping you waiting I got caught up in my lessons with Mr. Tang" MK responds, sitting next to his father. Red Son looked gobsmacked. The beautiful young man he had bumped into, was the prince of this land? Damn, life truly blessed him. Or cursed him depending on how you looked at it.
- the two are left alone in a separate room for a while.
- And MK straight up tells RS why he's agreeing to this union.
"Look Red Son. I've dreamed about meeting my one true love for a while. And I would give almost anything for that dram to be real. But I wouldn't ever dare give up my people, for as there price they mean more to me. I'm doing this for them, no other reason" MK says, his back straight and hands folded neatly in his lap. The look in his eyes was a mix of sadness, but that was drowned out by loyalty and determination. It just made Red Son fall for him even harder. Clearing his throat Red spoke.
"I understand, for im doing this for the betterment of my people to. But I propose a wager"
"A wager?"
"Yes, if i can make you fall in love with me by years end, before our marriage, we can live together like in the fairy tales from far away. But if I fail, in a years time afterwards you will be permitted to find your own path in life" Red Son stated. MK took a moment to process what was happening.
"So, if you succeed in making me fall in love with you, before our marriage we can live happily ever after?" Red Son nodded in response, letting the younger continue.
"And if I shouldn't fall for you, in a years time after our union, im free to leave?" Red Son nodded once more.
"So, what do you say?"
...
"Deal"
In the end, your free to choose their fate, should Red Son win the hart of Mk? Will he fail? Or will he let him go, and let him travel the country, after all Mk's a free spirit and keeping him trapped in a big house is like keeping a cannery trapped in a cage only for its song, only for it to dul. Or will the unthinkable happen and will both boys find their freedom? together or appart? I don't know, because that's all up to you đ
personally, Iâm partial to where MK and Red Son both find freedom together. Like they straight up run away together to somewhere far away and just live out there lives together.Â
this could also be genderbent thing as well. MK or Red as their respective counterparts. Again it doesn't have to be, but itâs whatever bro. im just spitting out the idea.Â
Also, there is a main side plot that they fight the WBS throughout the year as well, along with other shenanigans you wanna throw in.
____
The second is a My Hero Academia/BNH/MHA AU
truth be told i'm not a big fan of MHA i think it to over hyped(this is also coming from the same person thatâs a Fairy Tail fan lol), and the fandom i don't even know how to describe that mess, but I will admit not the whole of its toxic since every fandom has some toxic members, some even more so.Â
I just sometimes find myself enjoying MHA AUs like the Fullmetal Alchemist, Danny Phantom, Evil!Deuk AU and several others.Â
to make it clear I don't see this AU taking place the same time as the main plot of the actual Anime/Manga. This could be either like 6-10 years before or after the plot idk bro. But iâll do this after the main story plot of MHA, so keep that in mind ya? another thing, the gang is still in China, the top hero school in the world just so happens to be in Japan, and itâs only ever mentioned by Sun wukong and other pro heros. So MK never attended AU. in short itâs only ever mention/ reference. Â
_
- Mk was considered Quirkless as a kid.Â
- he was just a late blumer, i swear Â
- Maiâs Quirk is called Dragon.Â
- it pretty much works the same way as it does in the show(duh)
- Tangâs got a knowledge Quirk,Â
- my man can retain information and heâs basically an archive of information drawback being his personality lolÂ
- Piggsy is a Animal that gained a Quirk
- in cannon to my current knowledge, there are two other characters that can confirm animals can become sentient. the characters being Fumikage Tokoyami, & Nezu the principal at the school UA. Â
- Sandy is just Conner Kent, aka he like superman but can't fly, or shoot lasers from his eyes. And blue. Â
I have two scenarios for Macaque and Wukong Â
*- The first one is that, Sun Wukong & Macaque are brothers. twins to be exact.Â
- they where legit people, but have mutation quirks that made them too like monkeys.Â
- the added powers were just a boues.Â
- Sun and Mac are close growing up, like there brothers but also best friends.
- the draw back to there quirks could honestly be whatever you want bro idk, same with the others tbh. Personally I like to think Sun just has lack of motivation, and Macaque needs to draw on other people's energy.
- Sun is a hero, Monkey KIng and Mac is a villain Six Eared.
- Sun was always treated has the golden child in the family, Mac always resented that, but there shitty up bring didnât stop the two from being good brothers to one another.
- soon tho the resentment became hatred when Sun was able to attend UA in Japan, while Mac didn't.
- Mac be angyÂ
- so he became a villain, and joined the Chinese branch of the LOV(league of villains)
- Sun doesn't know this till he finds out during the all out war during the main story. and by that time heâs a full on hero with is own agency(The Flower Fruit agency)Â Â Â Â
- when the hero's ultimately win and Mac is arrestedÂ
- This ultimately hurts Sun a lot, his brother was in jail now, arrested for his involvement and wrong doings, he knew nothing about this! this brother, his blood. A bad guy? why? he hadn't seen his brother since he left for UA, he hadnât seen him when he came home, and started his agency.Â
- this just puts Sun into a funk so heâs not as active as he used to be, and he starts thinking he might need a successorÂ
*- The second one is that they were two separate people that had similar quirks and both attended UA but Sun ended up in the hero corse. so 1A.
- Both Macaque and Sun have similar quirks, Sunâs is obviously more light based while Macaqueâs is more shadow based(this applies to the first one as well)Â Â Â
- Macaque was placed in class 1B, U.A.âs High's Heroics Department, I believe, you can correct me.Â
- In cannon Class 1A and 1B both went to the training camp. I can see the teachers pinning Sun and Macaque against each other to hone their skills.Â
- And because of that they become great friends  Â
- In fact when they graduate they both co-found there hero agency together in China and are a duo.
- But due to Monkey Kingâs popularity and Six Eared's association with shadows(people sometimes saying he has more of a villains quirk than a heros) the public seeâs Macaque as Sunâs sidekick when thats far from the truth.Â
- now itâs up to you whether you think that Wukong and Macaque would be in a relationship together, but knowing how cooked we all are, ShadowPeach is a thing here more than likely.Â
- If you do or donât support/ like the ShadowPeach aspect, the two would be living together regardless since its more cost efficient.Â
- They my be heroes but living costs are expensive! Â
- I would imagine there would have been a huge fight/argument between the two in privet of course, at there home.(or in there shared office if you want the extra angst of the other people they work with hearing them fight)Â Â
- If the two are dating, then this would either lead to an out right breakup, or Macaque just up and leaving with Wukong thinking heâll come back once heâs cooled off. But after a week, with no sign of his partner, or him answering texts or calls, not even coming into work. Wukong gets worried that something might have happened to him. so there wouldn't be a confirmation if they were still a thing or not.Â
- But Wukong remains hopeful, despite the nagging at the back of his head, and gut telling him to go find Macaque, or atleast make a public statement, or even just tell another pro hero about it. Â
- on the not so shippy side, Macaque and Wukong still have there argument, and much like the ShadowPeach esc side, Macaque up and leaves, and isn't seen for weeks. the only difference here is that when Wukong comes home one night to there flat, most if not all of Macaques stuff is gone.Â
- where as if this was the ShadowPeach side, Macaque leaves all of his possession in the flat he and wukong share. for the simple reason being, he still loves him and wants to go back, but Macaque being Macaque canât bring himself to do it, especially after seeing just how hurt Wukong looked when he yelled at him just before he left. Â
- in other words, ANGST DIALED UP TO A 10 BABYÂ Â
- in either case, its a news report that confirms Wukong's suspicions that he desperately didnât want to believe, and that is Macaque turning into a villain.
- much like if the two were brothers, Wukong just canât take it and is no longer as active as he once was, and is thinking about, either A) Retirement B) Saying, âFuck Society, Be Gay Do Crimeâ and join Macaque as a villain himself, or C) find a successor, and a way to bring Macaque back to there side, but most importantly, back to him.  Â
- also extra points if you're after people's hearts and want to make them suffer;Â - If there dating, Wukong curleâs up in the bed he and Macaque shared, holding/wearing something of great value to Macaque and just crying himself to sleep, where as Macaque is getting wasted on alcohol, as he stumbles out of the bar heâs in, he either seeâs something that reminds him of Wukong or while heâs trying to put his wallet back into his pocket, a photo of them on their first date fallâs out. and Macaque just cries in a nearby alley way. And itâs there where he gets indoctrinated into the League.
    - If there just friends, macaque heads to the nearest forest and just levels it, where as Wukong just gets engrossed into his work, trying not to think about it. you could add you own spin on this, again i'm just spitballing.      Â
- NOW BACK TO MK! :DÂ Â Â
- Obviously MK is a huge Monkey King fan  Â
- at Twenty MK has come to terms he's quirkless (HEâS NOT)
-for ANGST reasons MKs fokes kicked him out at this realization at 13.
- he works at Piggsy's Noodle shop, and has been since he was 14.
- don't need a quirk to drive or cook!
- the boy lives a content life with his new family, till DBK happens :D
- DBK runs a Mafia(in conjunction with TLOV) and has been in jail for like 5 years thanks to Monkey King, PIF and RS brake him out one night when MK's out making a late night delivery since Piggsy had the bright idea to go 24/7 service!
- one thing leads to another and Mk somehow manifest what looks like the Monkey King's staff, but its not, itâs MKs powers, it just so happens to be the same power the Monkey King has. And it practically goes down the same way in the pilot.Â
- but unlike the pilot Mk and Mei go straight to the FF Agency, after making a panicked call to Pigsy and Tang.
- one way or another Mk are lead into Wukongs office. Mei being forced to stay in the lobby.
- they have there convo, butterfly monkey squishing included.
- "And so, I want you do be my success-" BOOM đ„
- from there they rush downstairs and see that the lobby has been infiltrated by the DB fam, and you know fight.
- once the DB family seems like there down, PIF wisks them away. Much to Monkey Kingâs displeasure.
From there stuff kind plays out like cannon, the calabash ep is just a conjoint quirk the Demon bros have. As for EP9, ill have to script that one out myself lol. I'll get onto it as soon as my will to commit stabs me in the face. Till then have a dancing Kermit the frog.
Now if you'll excuse me, am about to Kermit a felony :D
(For legal reasons thats a joke)
Psst @writingamongther0ses its done
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Tag game!!!
name:Â lovely đ
pronouns: she/her cuz im boring
star sign:Â Aquarius (ITS THE AGE OF AQU-sorry)
height: 5'0 (IM SMOL DONT COME AT ME)
age: i have lived through 18 rotations around the sun (am baby)
phone wallpaper: cute game grumps fanart cuz the grumpy bois are my oxygen
hogwarts house:Â hufflepuff baby!
ever had a crush on a teacher:Â uhhhh yes currently still in love with said teacher
coolest halloween costume: android 18 from DBZ (my sister was android 17, it was awesome)
fav 90s show:Â prolly Futurama (it may not technically be a 90âs show BUT) i love watching funny lighthearted stuff, serious shows are not my thing usually.
last kiss:Â my ex bf ;-; it was our last kiss but i didnt know it at the time. Anyone want to make a new memory with me? đ
fav pair of shoes: for christmas my papa got me a pair of shoes from the anime fruits basket. Theyre so pretty but before that it was my beat up maroon converse
ever been to vegas: yep yep. my family goes on trips a lot and it was boring to me as a kid so ive never really enjoyed myself but itd be cool to go and chill
fav book: this list could be miles long bcs im a loner and lose myself in books. so ummmm anthem by ayn rand (I LOVE THIS BOOK), a child called it, here lies bridget, my life and other black holes, and frankenstein (the list goes on)
fav fruit: mmmmmm i like cherries a lot. grapes are pretty rad too.
stupidest thing ive ever done: ok even tho am baby i have done a LOT of stupid things. like. a lot. one of them dating a JERK another was skipping an entire band competition to hang out with said jerk behind a church đł
fav tv shows: AHHHHH DOES ANIME COUNT??? Okay well criminal minds, cells at work, the good place,
last movie i saw in theaters: BRO IDK LIKE FRICKEN COROLLA HARDCORE COCKBLOCKED EVERYONE
ahhhh thank you so so much @ssahoodrathotchner for the tag, it makes me feel so happy and loved! đ now i pass this on to @writefasttalkevenfaster , @danny-likes-peas , and @yours-truly-r also @tiny-hydromancer-gnome i think itd be cool even if you dont do this to just send me your answers đ
Or anyone who wants to do it lol. Love yall!
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1-100 >:DDDD REVENGE!!!
FELIXXXXXXXXXXXX >:(( 1. Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? -spotify 2. is your room messy or clean? -itâs pretty messy i guess 3. what color are your eyes? -blue and grey
4. do you like your name? why? -yeah itâs fine 5. what is your relationship status? -single 6. describe your personality in 3 words or less -certified intrusive thot 7. what color hair do you have? -brown and rn itâs red 8. what kind of car do you drive? color? -i dont have a car 9. where do you shop? -hot topic, goodwill, target 10. how would you describe your style? -comfy emo 11. favorite social media account -of mine, probably discord or youtube 12. what size bed do you have? -twin >:(( 13. any siblings? -i have 1.5 brothers 14. if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why? -probably vancouver, idk canada seems lit 15. favorite snapchat filter? -i like the one with devil horns and a tail but its cute 16. favorite makeup brand(s) -i dont wear makeup 17. how many times a week do you shower? -i used to shower every day, but i dont do anything that gets me dirty so like maybe 3 times but if i leave the house then i shower 18. favorite tv show? -stranger things 19. shoe size? -8 or 9 20. how tall are you? -5âČ6 with shoes >:(( 21. sandals or sneakers? -sneakers wtf 22. do you go to the gym? -lol no 23. describe your dream date -making some pie or something together and then eating the pie and then sitting on some rooftop looking at stars 24. how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment? -quite a bit actually but iâm saving up for a phone lol so soon it will be like maybe 10 dollars lmao 25. what color socks are you wearing? -not wearing socks but the ones i had earlier were white (ankle length) 26. how many pillows do you sleep with? -just one but it sucks 27. do you have a job? what do you do? -NO BUT IM TRYING TO GET A JOB BUT THE FUCKIN PEOPLE THERE ARE GHOSTING ME AND WONT REPLY TO MY EMAILS SO LIKE SBJHBJS 28. how many friends do you have? -like 4 lmao 29. whats the worst thing you have ever done? -idk nothing super bad but i do a lot of small shit that makes me feel guilty when i realize what i did 30. whats your favorite candle scent? -juniper rosewood 31. 3 favorite boy names -leo, clay, charlie 32. 3 favorite girl names -ivy, uh... idk thats all ive got 33. favorite actor? -no clue 34. favorite actress? -no clue 35. who is your celebrity crush? -not a celeb but iâd smash danny phantom 36. favorite movie? -nightmare before christmas or edward scissorhands 37. do you read a lot? whats your favorite book? -no, but my fav book is probably the prince and the pauper? idk 38. money or brains? -CASH MONEYYYY jk probably brains but if your entire personality is being âsmartâ like fuck off lmao  39. do you have a nickname? what is it? - a bunch of people call me son (see #49, #100), some call me rat, dumdum, goth boy
40.how many times have you been to the hospital? -just once i think when i was birthed. i also went once with my brother cause he kicked some scissors i left out on the floor and it sliced his toe the fuck open and he needed stitches and i watched him get the stitches and almost passed out :/ 41. top 10 favorite songs -please dont make me do this i dont have it in me 42. do you take any medications daily? -yea i take 20mg of vyvanse but i need to get it raised to 30 cause 20 is Not Enough 43. what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc) -i got some dry fuckin skin yall dont even know 44. what is your biggest fear? -it depends. the dark is a pretty constant one though 45. how many kids do you want? -like 2 or 3 eventually 46. whats your go to hair style? -in my face, looking stupid 47. what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc) -itâs pretty small 48. who is your role model? -i dont fuckin know lmao 49. what was the last compliment you received? - âi belive in you, my son, youâre an amazing human beingâ (same friend mentioned in #100, not actually a parent of mine) 50. what was the last text you sent? -âno itâs a raccoonâ YOU GET NO CONTEXT LMAO 51. how old were you when you found out santa wasnât real? -i dont think i ever hardcore believed in him, maybe i did though i remember sleeping under the tree one christmas eve waiting for him but i was like âoh yeah that makes senseâ i guess 52. what is your dream car? -i honestly dont give a shit as long as it actually fucking works 53. opinion on smoking? -cigarettes? fuck no thatâs nastyyy. weed? thatâs fine i guess but wait till youâre like 18. 54. do you go to college? -no. am sophomore n highschool 55. what is your dream job? -musician/palentologist 56. would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs? -fuck the suburbs lmao, but also im tired of rural, so like.. semi urban?? 57. do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels? -no but i take the little soaps >:)) 58. do you have freckles? -yes 59. do you smile for pictures? -awkwardly, yes 60. how many pictures do you have on your phone? -dont have a phone but i have like 12 on my computer currently. 4 are of me, the rest are of my cat or random shit 61. have you ever peed in the woods? -yes 62. do you still watch cartoons? -cartoons these days kinda suck but like if they were good fuck yeah i would like gravity falls can come hang yknow? 63. do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendyâs or McDonalds? -i had nuggets from mcdonalds today so i guess them? i dont really care 64. Favorite dipping sauce? -i got sweet and sour but i dont like it that much. that schezuan sauce was great 65. what do you wear to bed? -wouldnt you like to know? ;)) 66. have you ever won a spelling bee? -NO ive only been in two. the first one i misspelled the word âturmoilâ cause i had never heard it before and the second one i spelled the word âowedâ as âodeâ cause i was thinking like ode to joy and then i felt like a big Fool afterwards :(( 67. what are your hobbies? -lol what hobbies 68. can you draw? -i am physically able to draw, but not well, no 69 (haha). do you play an instrument? -yeah i play a few 70. what was the last concert you saw? -i saw Chicago in either georgia or tennessee i cant remember in like 2016 71. tea or coffee? -hot coffee, iced tea. NOT the other way around. (i love both though) 72. Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts? -starbucks 73. do you want to get married? -sure why not 74. what is your crushâs first and last initial? -dont have a crush 75. are you going to change your last name when you get married? -idk maybe 76. what color looks best on you? -i dont know but i wear black a lot and thatâs pretty dope 77. do you miss anyone right now? -yeah 78. do you sleep with your door open or closed? -closed 79. do you believe in ghosts? -on the fence. not 100% âoh my god look at these gHoSt oRbS i need to sage my house!!!â but i accept that thereâs some things i wont understand about the world and that i have no answers to. i wouldnt be surprised if there are, and i wouldnt be surprised if there arenât. 80. what is your biggest pet peeve? -whatever my adhd decides i viscerally hate with a firey passion right at that moment 81. last person you called -my brother (the 1 of the 1.5 from #13 and the one who sliced his toe in #40) 82. favorite ice cream flavor? -chocolate is dope 83. regular oreos or golden oreos? -regular double stuff. if you say golden, mint, peppermint, or thin oreos iâm gonna have to euthanize you, i dont make the rules. 84. chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? -rainbow cause itâs prettier 85. what shirt are you wearing? -queen shirt from hot topic 86. what is your phone background? -i didnt get a phone between question 60 and now but my computer one is some mountains with the moon in the background 87. are you outgoing or shy? -really depends on who iâm around 88. do you like it when people play with your hair? -YES FUCK AAAAAAA (this girl played with my hair literally once in middle school and i was like oh shit and i had a crush on her until the end of middle school true story,,, so ashley if youâre out there-) 89. do you like your neighbors? -to the left theyâre fine and their dog is nice but idk what happened to the horses so thatâs sus but thatâs where our cat came from so they can hang guess, behind me theyâre fine but their boys are loud, to the right theyâre fine, and even further to the right are the dope neighbors and waaaaaaaaaay far to the right is a llama and heâs dope as hell 90. do you wash your face? at night? in the morning? -whenever the fuck i remember to/have the energy 91. have you ever been high? -i dont think so but i wouldnt put it past myself 92. have you ever been drunk? -not that i can remember, no 93. last thing you ate? -sloppy joe from a can 94. favorite lyrics right now -ânot gonna waste my life, cause iâve been fucked upâ 95. summer or winter? -fall. fuck you 96. day or night? -night but i like it when itâs actually night and it doesnt get dark at like 4 fucking pm cause that makes me depressed 97. dark, milk, or white chocolate? -dark is good, milk is fine, white is only suitable for fancy stripes on chocolate covered strawberries 98. favorite month? -i vibe with september 99. what is your zodiac sign -sagittarius (was almost a scorpio but i was holding out >:))) 100. who was the last person you cried in front of? -in person, my mom like 6 months ago, on a discord call, my friend (i love you by the way, youâre the best,,, i dont think he has tumblr but im just putting it out there) like a month or so ago. i hate crying in front of people, i turn into such a hyperventilating snot monster which is not suitable for human gaze and thats the real tea :/
felix this took like 2 hours of my life i will never get back i hate you and i hope youâre happy with what youâve done <3 <3
also anyone who wants to stalk me, enjoy this information that im handing to you on a silver platter :)) <3
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