#dan and phil did a stream and raised so much money and they have an even smaller platform can you imagine how much am could raise

[yellowloid]

Do we know Miles's or any of the AM members' opinions on the genocide in Gaza? Like I love them to death, but the lack of response has reaaally been bothering me. Not to mention the amount of privilege in not carrying about politics *looking at you, Alex*. I've seen Louise being pro-Israel.

OHHHHH anon i've been WAITING to talk about this. thank you for the question.

the answer is no we don't. to my knowledge, none of the members have openly talked about it. there has been no story on their official instagram, nor has matt (the only one with a public profile) posted anything about it on his account. not only that, but i did some research and apparently that benefit concert that him, tyler parkford and josh homme took part in also hosted people like jesse hughes and sarah silverman who are more or less openly pro-israel. which doesn't mean *matt* is, it just means he's not careful who he's associating himself and his image with.

the others have stayed silent. and miles, too - who's so active on social media - has never even reposted anything about it. not a word.

about the girlfriends, louise (and amanda) have spoken about "wanting peace" and louise especially has reposted some stupid ass posts a few months ago basically saying it's not "childish" to just wish peace for everyone - proving that she literally knows nothing about what has been happening for DECADES. both her and amanda have repeatedly proven they're centrists, which is just so. yikes.

the only one among all of them who has openly and almost immediately asked for a ceasefire is katie.

i've seen some people argue that the royal albert hall proceeds have gone to the war child association, but honestly - that's not enough. that was before, and even though knowing that is better than nothing, something they did in the past doesn't justify their lack of a statement on the genocide in the present. the fact that they're not even active on social media - just because they're too lazy to get someone to properly manage their account - isn't an excuse for staying silent.

whether they like it or not, they're celebrities. they have a platform they could use and they repeatedly choose not to use it. i love them but for the past few months i've been beyond disappointed in them.

[ashleyeveerson]

✨ THE DAN AND PHIL LORE pt. 3✨

CHECK OUT PART 2: https://www.tumblr.com/ashleyeveerson/760707933651746816?source=share

Phil ALSO comes out! (yeah no i'm not crying what? not them feeling comfortable enough to be themselves yeah). 2019 also brings us the adoption of a fish named Norman (a cutie) AND they also post pictures about their recent trip to Japan [the photo of Phil looking up to Dan behind the camera? yeah i am so normal about it, i swear]. There is hope in the horizon still for a Dan and Phil comeback...

BAM! A certain virus runs wild and forces everyone to stay at home. Phil continues to upload solo videos which distracted so many of us during these dark times. Dan, however is AWOL and the only pic we have of him is a shitty screenshot of him in glasses and a mask helping Phil rescue an injured pigeon (lockdown was WILD).

Also, my boy Dan post a cryptic tweet that leads to the announcement of a self-help book named YOU WILL GET THROUGH THIS NIGHT (because you will <3). Nah but I can't count how many times I've sobbed reading it, just him trying to help out others who have also struggled with mental health... istg i love this man

Hey so THEY BUY THEIR FOREVER PHOUSE TOGETHER they're gonna kill me one day istg. "Dan and Phil just decided to pay a mortgage together", top 10 sentences that would kill a 2016 phan. They are slaying, they are glowing... also rip Norman the fish you will not be forgotten

So during 2014 the fates (aka a random youtuber) foretold that Dan and Phil would be married in 2022. Since that clearly didn't happen the meme PHIVORCE united the phandom once more. ALSO Dan is out there shitting on youtube (as he should) and going on his solo tour WE'RE ALL DOOMED! Which i love with all my heart and also Phil being there for him every step of the way... AHHHHHHHH

Anyways a certain video called Dan and Phil finally tell the truth hits the internet and let's just say GOD DAMN. This also starts a wonderful trend amongst Dan and Phil in which they make fun of their audience (we deserve it ngl) and absolutley SHOCK US with new information about bonkers shit from their past [apparently they were offered a threesome MULTIPLE TIMES???]

It's the end. They've decided to give up their channel "Dan and Phil Games" forever... let's take a moment and silent and mourn with a compilation of Heart eyes Howell

...

SIKE! We're back baby and we're better than ever!!! The goodbye video turned out the be an ANNOUNCEMENT of their comeback. They are back, Dil Howlter is here and Phil confesses to having dyed everything green in the house when Dan went on tour bc he missed him (OH GOD). Also, the Halloween baking video introduced us to the icon that is.... *drumroll please*

SISTER DANIEL, the queen of making everyone reconsider their sexuality... she is the moment, she is an icon and she is serving astronomical levels of cunt at all time [jokes aside, Dan being comfortable enough to do drag in public, fuck they've come so far i'm so proud of them <3].

And here we are in the future, it's present day and they are queerer and happier than ever. THE PICTURES I CAN'T ISTG. Also Dan's Birthday stream is beyond iconic. First of all my unproblematic kings make it a charity stream to donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund (using their public influence for good hell yeah)... And how did they raise the money you ask? WELL BY HITTING IS WHERE WE'RE WEAKEST. Sister Daniel makes a spectacular comeback, FATHER PHIL is introduced and Dan even dyes his hair red to be more Good Omens coded... which timeline are we living in again? like how is any of this real?

Also them drawing the PINOF whiskers on their faces again... they're literally growing old together I'm gonna go sob in a corner. Also the fake apology video bc they have no fashion sense in the Sims 4 is hilarious as fuck. HOW CAN THEY POSSIBLY BE SO MUCH HOTTER ON THEIR THIRTIES EXPLAIN??

anyways the phandom is still speculating wether they're erasing "i love you's" at the end of their text when they show them on videos... guess some things never change. Nah but the vibes are COMPLETELY DIFFERENT NOW, they are more open than they've ever been and participate on the phan culture FULLY to the point that they're the ones terrorizing us now.

QUICK DETOUR TO TALK ABOUT PHIL'S FAMOUS BAD LUCK (and then they wonder why he's always dying in the fanfics). Nah but my poor man has had his fair share of medical problems, the most recent being...

OH GOD WHY WOULD YOU ANNOUNCE SOMETHING LIKE THAT THIS WAY?? nah like using humor as a coping mechanism and all but do they wanna gives a heart attack?! iconic i fear however

So yeah the video where they talk about it is WILD (funniest shit about the whole ordeal is that a nurse mistook Dan as Phil's son). Also I saw a tweet speculating about Phil having a hickey like... first of all what is it? 2009? Second of all IT'S MOST LIKELY A POPPED VESSEL FROM LOSING ALL THAT BLOOD YOU KNOW

They still were able to go on their vacation (aka the rodent boy summer) which gifted us with this iconic pics... ALSO they dropped a new Dan and Phil beats for summer go check out the names of the tracks istg they wanna kill their fans.

Nothing is sacred anymore, they've infiltrated twtphan, they're actively reposting memes and writing fanfiction about themselves. It's the wild west, everytime you get a notification is like playing Russian Rulet. Cringe is dead and Dan and Phil ARE COMING NEAR YOUR CITY on a tour named "Terrible Influence" where Phil's spent 300€ on silicone. It's a wonderful time to be a phan.

OKAY SO here's some stuff that didn't make the cut but that i find too hilarious to not mention. In no apparent order: DAN DRESSING UP AS A CATBOY, Dan and Phil playing technicians 1 and 2 on Big Hero 6 and two brothers on the Lion King (wtf was that also they gave the gorilas matching fringes), Dan dressing up as a golden pig (my boy has RANGE) and finally Dan being too embarassed to admit he stalked Phil and telling a reporter he was only asking for "editing tips" if you know what i mean

Also a short compilation of Dan and Phil losing the idgaf war against eachother THEY ARE SO THOUGHTFUL ABOUT EVERYTHING. Special mention to Daniel's 🧡 when Phil praised "We're all doomed!" and Dan's ranch metaphor to describe their relationship (just go watch the mukkbang video OH LORD)

SO, in conclusion... Dan and Phil's refusal to belittle their past and instead embrace it as part of their story while actively moving into the future alongside the phandom YEAH THAT SHIT MEANS SOMETHING. They're simultaneously healing our inner child while embracing us as the adults we've become i have many feelings about them

So what are they?

They're just Dan and Phil.

[jilliancares]

All is Fair: Chapter 9

Word count: 3.6k

TW: uuuhh giant cliffhanger that SEEMS like the worst thing ever but just take it in stride my dudes if there were any major tws i would’ve listed them at the beginning SO

ao3 ; wattpad

masterlist ; next chapter

CHAPTER NINE:

Never before had Phil felt quite like he was going to be eaten alive by guilt alone. He was sure Emma was feeling something along the same lines, as her eyes seemed to be filled with the same amount of anguish Phil was harboring. They’d never expected for a plan they’d considered so ingenious to backfire so completely, leaving Dan in an almost shell-like state. Phil was afraid if he so much as touched him, he’d break.

He and Emma were currently busy packing up the camp. Since they’d been forced to leave all their supplies behind, this meant stomping out the little fire they’d been able to make and half-heartedly covering the tracks they’d made in the ground with leaves. Dan was sitting against a tree, looking deep into the forest, appearing as if he hadn’t moved all night.

Emma murmured something about trying to find some forest berries for breakfast and Phil nodded idly. He had some golden drachmas in his pocket, along with a wad of cash he’d thought to move from his backpack before they’d entered that warehouse. It had turned out to be smart thinking, after all, seeing as none of them had their backpacks any longer.

Slowly, Phil approached Dan, afraid he’d surprise him and Dan would go sprinting off like a startled rabbit.

“Dan,” Phil said. Instead of jerking towards Phil and blinking rapidly, as if not even knowing he was there, Dan just slowly turned his head, accompanied by one long, slow blink. And then he raised his eyebrows.

Phil shrunk to the ground beside him, fiddling with the hem of his shirt for a moment before he found it in himself to speak up. “Are you going to be okay?”

“I’m fine,” Dan said easily. If he hadn’t been able to see Dan, if he were perhaps just talking to him over the phone, he might’ve believed it. But he could see the shadows under Dan’s eyes, could see his faraway look and the whites of his knuckles on his knees. Phil knew he wasn’t okay.

“Did he… Did… Jeremy… touch you?” He knew Jeremy had touched Dan, but again, touch wasn’t really what he was asking about. He felt sick to his stomach, thinking back to how Jeremy had touched Dan in that warehouse.

When Dan had first walked into the room, he’d thought he was just acting. He’d been clinging to Jeremy’s arm all love-struck-like, looking at him adoringly and playing the part completely convincingly. But then he hadn’t stopped playing the part.

Something thick and hard to swallow past rose up in Phil’s throat when he remembered Jeremy pulling Dan back against his chest, remembered him touching him all over his torso, seeing that hand dip further and further down, violating Dan all the while. Some sort of primal rage had taken over him, and before he’d known it he’d procured his sword and was charging towards the bastard with murderous intent. He’d wanted to slice his head clean off and stab his carcass over and over until he was completely unrecognizable. Instead, he’d had to just take Dan and run, leaving the monster in a state that allowed for too much breathing, in Phil’s opinion.

So yes, Phil knew Jeremy had touched Dan. But he didn’t know if he’d touched Dan more, if he’d done even worse things to him before they’d entered that room together. Gods, just thinking about it now had Phil rearing up to go. He might have to track all the way back to that warehouse to tear that fucker apart.

“No,” Dan said simply, in answer to Phil’s question.

Phil reached forward and grabbed Dan’s hand. He was almost surprised when Dan let it happen, but he accepted it gratefully, twining his fingers with Dan’s and pulling their linked hands closer towards him. “I’m sorry for letting that happen to you,” Phil said sincerely. “If you want, we can turn back and torture him until he forgets his own name.” This, somehow, cracked a smile out of Dan, who squeezed Phil’s hand momentarily.

“I’m good,” Dan said, with a little shake of his head. “We should continue on, anyway. Know where Hephaestus lives?”

Phil didn’t, in fact, know where Hephaestus lived, but he couldn’t deny that their chances were looking better now than ever. All they really needed was a good brainstorming session, probably, although they’d have to wait for Emma to return for that to happen. And so, while they waited, they talked. They shared quiet, simple words, their hands linked together the entire time. At some point, Phil had started rubbing over the back of Dan’s hand with his thumb.

During a lull in the conversation, a moment of quiet, Dan cleared his throat softly. “You know,” he said. “That was my first kiss. My one with Jeremy.”

Phil felt the breath fall out of his mouth as if a bowling ball had been swung into his stomach. Of fucking course that had to happen to Dan—how… how unfair was that!? Dan, while appearing kind of moody and closed off at first, was in reality so sweet and kind underneath. He was strong, and brave, and a bit stupid for not accepting himself completely, but he was still entirely wonderful. Dan didn’t deserve to have his first kiss stolen like that, didn’t deserve to have something that was supposed to be exciting and fun and maybe magical stolen by a monster.

“It doesn’t count,” Phil claimed, squeezing Dan’s hand tighter as he said so. “You were cursed—it doesn’t count.”

“It does,” Dan said simply. “I can… I can remember it all, so…”

“Nope,” Phil insisted, shaking his head perhaps a bit childishly. “Doesn’t count!” he sung. This cracked a smile out of Dan, along with a disbelieving shake of his head.

“If that wasn’t my first kiss—”

“It wasn’t,” Phil interrupted firmly. “First kisses are supposed to be good. Maybe a bit clumsy, maybe shy and timid, but still good.”

“You’re a real romantic, huh?” Dan laughed. Phil shrugged.

“You could say so.”

“Maybe you should’ve been the son of Aphrodite,” Dan said, rolling his eyes as he did.

“Nah. I never could’ve been as pretty as you.” And then, when Dan looked up at him, his eyes wide with surprise and his cheeks tinted pink, Phil leaned in and kissed him. Dan inhaled sharply against him, shocked, but he fell right into the kiss, his lips moving eagerly against Phil’s and a shaking hand coming up to tentatively touch his jaw.

When Phil pulled away, Dan’s face was full-blown red and his lips were pink and shining. He couldn’t seem to stop blinking.

“Remember that as your first kiss instead,” Phil said simply. At the word ‘kiss’, Dan’s eyes fluttered down, his hand slipping out of Phil’s.

“Um…” he cleared his throat, his hand coming up to tug impatiently at one of his curls. “You… You probably shouldn’t have kissed me,” he said quietly.

“Why.” Phil said it flatly—it was hardly a question.

Dan shrugged.

“Because you think it’s wrong?” Phil concluded. “Because you don’t want to be gay?”

Dan’s head shot up, his eyes so wide and full of panic that one might think Dan was facing a monster instead of his sexuality. “There’s nothing wrong with being gay, Dan.”

“I never said—”

“There’s nothing wrong with you being gay.”

Dan worried his lip, looking like he didn’t believe a word Phil was saying.

“Dude, your mom’s the goddess of love. It’s probably her fault you like guys anyway.”

“You think?” Dan said disbelievingly.

“I know that she absolutely doesn’t care about whatever your sexuality is,” Phil said certainly. “She just wants you to find love.” And with that, he grabbed Dan’s chin and kissed him once more—just a peck—before standing up. “Now stop moping around. We have to go find Hephaestus.”

—

After a quick call to Camp Half-Blood to speak to Chiron (they’d had to find a stream and figure out how to create a rainbow in it to connect them through long-distance-rainbow-calling), they were fresh on their way, headed towards the closest of the seven entrances into Hephaestus’ forges. Chiron figured that Hephaestus would probably be deep in his forge working on unknown creations right about now, seeing as no important dates were coming up to force the gods to get together on Mount Olympus.

Hephaestus had different entrances to his forges that mortals could enter through. They were lucky enough to be not so far from one now, and so, after a bit of a walk and almost two hours of waiting at what appeared to be an abandoned bus stop, they caught their ride. The run-down bus stop came with an equally run-down bus, the driver of said bus matching the set as well. He grunted when they climbed aboard, raising an eyebrow when Phil plopped the wad of paper bills into his hand.

“This money won’t do.”

“What?” Phil muttered, but Emma was squinting at the man, scrutinizing him.

“You want these?” she guessed, holding a pair of golden drachmas between her fingers. The man nodded and held out a hand, curling his fingers around the gold after Emma dropped it into his palm.

“Where to?”

“Hephaestus’s forge?” Phil tried, and the man’s lip curled into a smirk, perhaps a bit higher than it should’ve gone.

“Climb aboard.”

Sometimes, being a demigod meant ignoring the fact that someone was creepy and also probably a monster in order to get to where you needed to go. And so they did, in fact, climb aboard, edging past the driver and down the rows of the strangely empty bus. Towards the back sat a man with a bowler hat pulled low over his eyes, and towards the front was a little girl all by herself, sitting cross legged and humming under her breath. Deciding to avoid both of these two (possible) evils, they settled somewhere in between the other passengers, Dan squashed in with Phil on one seat and Emma on the one beside them.

Immediately, Emma curled up sideways on her seat and went to sleep, head pressed against the window. Phil didn’t blame her. He still felt tired even despite Dan having taken all three shifts the past night. After escaping from the warehouse the previous day, they’d had to take turns carting Dan’s limp body down empty roads and stretches of forest. Phil had hit him a bit harder on the head than he’d intended to, resulting in the extra long period of Dan being as good as dead.

He didn’t know how far they’d traveled, only that the sun had steadily sank through the sky and his entire body had been aching by the end of it. When they’d finally decided to take a break, they’d had to wait another hour entirely before Dan jerked back awake, crazy again.

Sure, pretending to be Jeremy may not have been the best idea Phil had ever had, but it was the only thing he’d been able to think of at the time. He and Emma had looked at each other, bewildered and pretty freaked out, when Dan had still been in a trance when he’d woken up. Phil had assumed that after being knocked out and carted across the state, the time and distance put between Dan and Jeremy would’ve been enough to end whatever had been done to him. It was only after he’d woken up that Phil had assumed there was something physically attached to him making him act that way.

And there was no way Dan would’ve let Phil touch him if he had known he was actually himself! Phil had only just knocked him out and torn him away from the love of his life, for all he was aware of. So yes, Phil had pretended to be Jeremy. And yes, he’d kissed Dan in order to find that creepy bug-like machine embedded into his skin. But he’d done it all for Dan’s well-being—honest. He hadn’t even thought about his own, personal benefit from it until afterwards when he was trying to sleep. Mostly, he’d thought about how he wished their first kiss could’ve been normal. (And sure, he’d managed to fix that whole situation this morning, but that didn’t stop him from feeling guilty about basically taking advantage of Dan in that state the previous day.)

“Think this is a trap?” Dan murmured, glancing over at Phil and away from the window. Trees were flying past them—possibly a bit faster than they should’ve been.

“I feel like it’s too soon for us to experience another trap.”

“Awesome.” With that, Dan slouched down in his seat, letting his head rest against Phil’s shoulder, and closed his eyes. It was about time he got some sleep.

While Emma and Dan slept, Phil stayed awake, vigilant, making sure the bus driver didn’t turn into a monster with terrifying teeth or something. His arm started to go numb after a while, so carefully, he rearranged Dan a bit, letting his arm wrap around the other boy’s waist. Dan mumbled something in his sleep and turned his face into Phil’s chest with a sigh.

Suffice to say, Phil was relieved when they got to what was apparently an entrance to Hephaestus’s forge unharmed. The bus driver remained seated and driving, the bowler hat guy stayed asleep, and the little girl was maybe just that—a little girl. Still, he was thankful to get off the bus and not be surrounded by strangers anymore, so it was with relief that he woke a sleepy and compliant Dan (and a grouchy and murderous Emma).

—

“Are you sure this is the right way?” Emma’s voice echoed loudly down the tunnel, probably broadcasting their exact position. At this point, Phil couldn’t even find it in himself to be bothered by this. If Hephaestus himself came charging around a corner with a fist raised Phil would probably just breathe a sigh of relief, thankful they’d finally found him.

“No,” Dan took it upon himself to say, although he was still walking confidently forward. “It just feels like we’re going the right way.”

When they’d arrived at the beginning of the tunnel—a hole in the ground in the bathroom of a Denny’s, which they’d only found thanks to wandering and Emma’s sudden urge to pee—Dan had strode off in one direction with a shrug, saying it “felt right”. Now, they were still walking in the direction of that feeling, although Emma was growing grouchier by the minute.

“We should’ve ate at that Denny’s.”

“No one should eat at Denny’s,” Phil argued.

“Shh!” Dan said suddenly, holding out a hand and stopping in his tracks. Phil complied, as did Emma, both of them listening hard. “What is that?”

It sounded like a far away clinking sound, getting closer and closer by the second. Except… it wasn’t coming from in front of them.

“Look out!” Emma hissed, throwing herself against the wall. Both Phil and Dan immediately did the same, Dan summoning his warhammer as they did, except there was nothing there.

“What exactly are we looking out for?” Phil demanded.

Emma pointed, her eyes wide, and Phil followed her finger towards the ground. And there, as grotesque and creepy looking as it was embedded into Dan’s skin, was Jeremy’s invention—the little spider-like contraption Phil had pulled out of Dan’s back. Suddenly anxious it would latch back onto Dan and take control of his brain again, Phil stepped in front of him, shoving him harder against the wall and debating whether to raise a foot and stomp on the creation.

How had it managed to follow them here? Phil distinctly remembered throwing the thing aside onto the forest floor after ripping it out of Dan—surely it couldn’t have managed to scuttle all the way after them? But, apparently, it had. And it scuttled past them too, further down the hallway they’d been traveling down this entire time.

“Um…” Phil managed, staring after it.

“Let’s follow it,” Dan decided, and with that he was shoving Phil away from him and striding after the thing, his warhammer hanging threateningly at his side.

—

Hephaestus wasn’t expecting them, apparently. He must’ve thought the efforts he’d gone to to stop them would’ve been enough to prevent them from actually making it all the way to his forge, as he blinked at them in surprise when they marched righteously in after the spider-machine.

“Who’re you?”

At this, Dan actually spluttered: eyes wide, mouth open indignantly, and words tripping over themselves in a haste to get out. “Wha—gu—but—who’re we?! We’re the demigods you’ve been trying to kill! I’m Aphrodite’s son!”

Hephaestus actually rubbed his chin, staring at Dan scrutinizingly.

“Aphrodite has a lot of sons,” he decided.

“Dan Howell!” Dan exclaimed. “I’m Dan Howell! You stole my mom’s bow!”

“Ooooh,” Hephaestus finally said, nodding. “I did try to kill you, didn’t I?”

“You don’t remember?” Emma interrupted.

Hephaestus, an immortal, all-powerful god, shrugged. “I’m a busy guy.”

There was a pause, during which Dan, Phil, and Emma all exchanged bewildered looks.

“So… Can we have it back then?” Phil tried, after Hephaestus went back to tinkering with whatever he’d been tinkering with when they’d entered the room.

“Hmm? Oh—no. No, you can’t.”

“Well…” Dan said. “We need it back. Otherwise we’ll have to… We’ll have to… Fight you.”

“Fight a god?” Hephaestus laughed, shaking his head. Then he put down his tools and picked up his machine, releasing a glimmering, robotic butterfly into the air. It circled his head twice before coming to land in his palm—he crushed it.

Phil cocked his head, wondering what exactly Aphrodite had been hoping for them to do in this situation anyway. It was practically suicide for a demigod to try to fight a god. It was like a fly fighting a spider—hopeless.  

“Yeah,” Dan said, and Phil looked at him in surprise when Dan raised his hammer over his head, glaring towards Hephaestus. The god cocked an eyebrow and actually stood up from his work table, letting the crushed machinery from his hand fall onto the table as dust.

“And this is the bow you want?” Hephaestus said, pulling the bow out from behind his table. He held it aloft, its presence almost taunting—so close, and yet so, so far. It was golden, shining in the low light from the flickering flames scattered throughout the large cavern.

“You know it is,” Emma said lowly, likely expecting the same thing as Phil: a trick. He was tense, his weight shifted towards his toes in preparation to start sprinting, either away from the god or towards him, depending on what exactly he did. But Hephaestus just stood there.

“I was only trying to teach her a lesson,” he said idly, now gripping the bow with both hands. He plucked the string, letting it twang. “Aphrodite, I mean.”

Phil shared a look with Dan. Backstory? he mouthed.

“We’re married, you know that? Sure, it was arranged by Zeus or whatever, but that doesn’t make it meaningless.”

“Uh oh…” Emma whispered out of the corner of her mouth. She’d sidled a little bit away from Phil, turning her head every which way and examining the crevices of the room they were in while Hephaestus spoke.

“Aphrodite doesn’t love me. She never will. Because she’s shallow,” while saying this, Hephaestus pointed vehemently at Dan, as if this were his fault. “She can’t stand the way I look, so instead she runs off with Ares, thinks she’s being all sneaky about it.” Phil frowned. That was pretty horrible—if it was true.

Hephaestus really did look a state, his face all misshapen and his beard alight with tiny flames (which he kept patting out), but that was just because he’d been chucked off Mount Olympus as a baby. Still, Phil wasn’t entirely sure Aphrodite would be that horrible—who was to say she wasn’t just doing this all for love? Cheating was disgraceful and disgusting, but in an arranged marriage? The goddess of love in an arranged marriage? Phil wasn’t entirely sure he could blame her, if Hephaestus wasn’t the one she was in love with.

“This,” said Hephaestus, raising the bow into the air, “is justice.”

And just like that, it clicked.

Burning passion and justice demands will find the bow in another’s hands.

Phil supposed the burning passion was Hephaestus—other than the tiny flames in his beard, he was clearly very strung up on Aphrodite not being true to him. And if stealing her bow was the demand justice made…

“Please,” Dan said, finally interrupting Hephaestus. The god looked at him, a mildly surprised expression on his face. Phil wondered if he’d managed to forget he was even talking to them.

Meanwhile, Dan looked all powerful and strong, like an avenging angel—though with a giant hammer instead of wings. He was standing tall, the weapon balanced somewhere above his shoulder as he glared up at the god. Phil found himself wanting to step forward, wanting to pull Dan into his arms and taste his lips once more…

“Return my mother’s bow,” he said, sounding authoritative and strong. “I know she never would’ve set out to deliberately hurt you. It’s only because of love that sh—”

“PAH!” Hephaestus spat, glowering at Dan so angrily Phil was sure lasers would shoot from his eyes. “Love. I’m so sick of that word.”

“But—”

“Ever hear that saying? ‘To love is to destroy’?” Hephaestus questioned.

Before Dan could hope to answer, he pulled the drawstring of the bow. It was like magic, how an arrow appeared in his hand as he did. It didn’t feel quite like magic, however, when Hephaestus released the arrow, letting it impale itself right into Phil’s chest.

~~

next chapter

[go-redgirl]

The Senate Votes To Approve The Controversial Spending Caps, Debt Ceiling Bill. The Final Passage Vote Was 67-28. This Bill Now Goes To President Trump to sign.

The Senate votes to approve the controversial spending caps, debt ceiling bill. The final passage vote was 67-28. This bill now goes to President Trump to sign.

_____________________________________________________________

INDIVIDUALS/COMMENTS/POSTS:

Steven Jones ​yep! Torrok 01 is a paid Leftist TROLL! Everyone just iggy it. Bye Troll! no one cares anymore about you internet morons.

Ya'akov benAwake ​Citizenship question on census please .

Phil Mueller ​Vote Trump to protect America from socialism

caro sato ​1000 dollars for everyone is a Ponzi scheme

Destiny Menzies ​Yeah because y'all are lining your pockets with it rather then spending the money on what it was meant for!!! Gggggrrrrr wake up people!!!

Uganda Knuckles Christ ​ANTIFA = terrorisme

greywolfe ​TRUMP 2020👍

Rod Bender ​the census aids gerimandering

HK ​Artemis Fow Thank you i was confused 😸

Drill Bit ​torrok 01​, Yea, That*s why he gives his Salary to Charity.

Star Dust ​What did you do with those taxes before Trump became President ? Talk to Obama about high drug prices.. He did that

Merlin Krisp ​Where’s my royals Roy’s 😂😂 JK

andrew richardson ​Balance the G da..mn budget, get your sh..t together CROOKS

John Ortiz ​War famine diseases natural disasters and civil war is coming soon to America. Christians prepare

text kite ​CREEPER, AW MAN

Joey Big Things Poppin ​The kids shouting for Trump is because their parents are part of the 1%. while these children never worked a day in their life ,college paid for lmfao..

Havefunplayguitar ​Baltimore? Send money I need to pay my beach house mortgage

Why are you so Angry? ​Thats what we pay you clowns to do! Do your jobs, or fear, fear our LIBERTY!

torrok 01 ​If you make $50k a year Trump tax cut gave you $570. If you make $1m it gave you $70k. Is that fair? I would rather $1k a month

Annika_green ​@Joey that’s a broad generalization .

awildbill rightous ​HK ,, may the force be with you!👀👌

Happy Voice ​tax cuts for the rich lead to higher deficits and diminishing returns for the country

Travis Jackson ​Our President Trump is making Me proud.

GDPops ​Government shouldn't spend money they don't have. TRY DOING THAT AT HOME

Fuzz Man ​1 state 1 vote

Rebecca Brown ​Trump 2020!

Nothing ​Vote for democrats if you want your cities filled with 💩💩💩 and 💉💉💉

Edward Wallace ​Government bad answer to all problems. Marianne Williamson 2020

Mo Hamhead ​If it was up to me there would be zero free stuff for lazy unambitious parasites

nighttr ​I have an idea lets give the super wealthy a tax break,

Danny Hemphill ​the people that make a lot of money pay a lot of taxes idiot

Ramiro Garcia ​RINO'S & DEM'S SUCK.

David Hensley ​shut down the government good do it

Merlin Krisp ​True Danny 👍

richardcvlr5 ​there's creepy joe he's moving kinda slow in the men's room.

IR_Dankenstein ​Will there still be gummy bears? If not, it's on like Donkey Kong!

Drill Bit ​46% of people, don*t pay taxes.

Why are you so Angry? ​Many take pride in the fact that their children are made to work in honorable situations, with the word of god in their hearts, integrity in their minds, and a knowing of behavior. Who made you stupid

torrok 01 ​$1000 a month to everyone stimulates growth better than giving money to the rich

Havefunplayguitar ​I was blocked

abc def ​Joey why u watch fox,no tin foil hats here

Friendly Tourist ​I ❤ Cop Splash 💦🐖🐖

Niobokupletskite ​i say having it in your hand now is better then going out and find it

Uganda Knuckles Christ ​trump 2020 Landslide

HoarderCatG ​Nicole junkermann

Rod Bender ​people that make 12k a year and afford 1k per year taxes dumbocrats

awildbill rightous ​Master Jedi Trump leading the Jedi now! 2020 The lightside will defeat the darkside!🤜

Amy Tyler ​🚬🚬🚬🚬🚬🚬🚬🚬

Bob A ​Richard he’s in there with booker

Rebecca Brown ​We The People demand Term Limits for congress and grandfather the limits.

Annika_green ​If there’s a crash & the bankers and corps get bailout, I will be upset!!! I think a check one time to WE THE PEOPLE IS FINE

Fuzz Man ​all the money all the billionaires in the world has would not pay for dems dreams

Dan Williams ​if there is more of something, does it increase in value?

Edward Wallace ​So don't spend pay the dog gone debt. Marianne Williamson 2020

Last Days ​What a fool. OH BUT THEY want to give everybody free S___! to put that debt on the backs of his grands

origine online ​Free education Free medical 5 weeks vacation bigger salary thx , try to be more like my friends in europe

Joey Big Things Poppin ​Never watched fox ever.. Alphabet

Happy Voice ​Raise taxes to reduce the deficit and fulfill budget shortfalls, it's not rocket science. Can't tighten the belt much more.

Stephen Rothwell ​maybe the good senators can donate his salary and half his net worth if he loves the kids so much

L Yachty ​TRUMP 2020

MsMyxlplyx

​CUT SPENDING....START WITH CONGRESS PORKERS Welcome to live chat! Remember to guard your privacy and abide by our community guidelines. LEARN MORE

Leandro Garcia ​leave here , and go to the CSPAN live stream if you like

window789456123 ​trump 2020

Mo Hamhead ​There's too much parasite and not enough host now

Steven Jones ​do not buy the 1% LIE! That is all it is. LIES! Taxes went to everyone almost. THIS IS A LIE!

Why are you so Angry? ​Get a job, vote the Nanny government OUT of OUR lives! Figure it out, grow up. Most of us do, with or without the perpetually pubescent.

Danny Hemphill ​oh yes. free this free that equals loss of freedom

Blue Wizard ​🏆TRUMP 2020🏆

nighttr ​Trump supporters sure could use the free education

Drill Bit ​The rich make their money just like you do. Have you ever been hired by poor person???

torrok 01 ​Google Andrew Yang and check out his policies

Merlin Krisp ​Shut up 🤐

KritterKracker ​It's called stealing from Peter to pay Paul

De Dowd ​this guy is a Phoney Windbag! All talk and no action as long as his palm is greased with cash. Just watched a press conference in Baltimor and the Feds are cracking down on the drug dealers. Finally!

andrew richardson ​torrok 01, you sir, are an idiot, don;t breed

GDPops ​$22,022,376,894,711.12 National Debt

Kirrsty Locklear ​this dude is full of it our money is being stolen and not spent on the issues and foreign countries ain't paying their bills

Havefunplayguitar ​Why am I being censored?

Uganda Knuckles Christ ​Eat bacon our leave USA🥓

Amy Tyler ​This is so interesting! NOT!

Nothing ​no such thing as free you will have uneducated taxpayers paying for top earner college graduate degrees

Niobokupletskite ​tax break for the rich is a disinfection for the rip of businesses that surround us

Adrana West ​VOTE THE RIGHT WAY FOR AMERICA: TRUMP 2020

john doe ​ugh...

ascii ​Has anyone mentioned Israel yet?

AA14/MoshDuck ​Amy Tyler: Then why are you here?

Friendly Tourist ​🌚 PAGAN 🌛

IR_Dankenstein ​Word of the day is: Entitlement

Rod Bender ​"healthcare" should not be confused with "health insurance" DUMBOCRATS

Edward Wallace ​No one should be taxed by Government. Marianne Williamson 2020

grabitz ​slow mode

Bill Bush ​n

Star Dust ​why did you let Bush and Obama have all that money ?

Annika_green ​Stop taking too many meds and eat healthy. Again, PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY

No Regrets ​vote Trump 2020 President Trump 20/20 all the way

Happy Voice ​It's fiscally responsible to raise taxes on everyone, not just the rich, but middle class as well, before we even talk about changing healthcare or education.

Greig Ballantine ​oh my omar

BayouSef1 ​I don't know what he is talking about. It didn't cost me that much for a 12 year old.

Drill Bit ​Mushroom Williamson, Throw back from Woodstock

Steve Landy ​Trump 2020 ok

torrok 01 ​Trump has done nothing for you. Google Andrew Yang

AnabelleLee100 ​CAPS ARE ONLY WAY TO FIX HEALTHCARE COSTS

Joey Big Things Poppin ​Talk deficit yet their spending more than they can print

andrew richardson ​National debt goes up 100 million per hour 24/7

GDPops ​DISGUSTING DEMOCRATS - BOHICA

Spiny Norman ​taxation is theft, crime does not pay

DRUNKEN RAMBLE ​We're all gonna get a Skyscraper on 5th Ave one day. It's gonna be Huge!!!!......lololol

David Hensley ​so who is this guy lobbying for big pharma?

Uganda Knuckles Christ ​Omar antifa leader?

Dawn Gray ​Joe Biden SAID it last night. GOV'T has failed us 40yrs. Joe has BEEN THERE 49 THERE LIES THE PROBLEM. #TermLimits #ForthepeopleBythePeople

Danny Hemphill ​torrok01. your delusional. never gonna happen. IT'S called communism

DFG ​Corey Booker is the whitest person running for president

junior ​Andrew Yang 2020

KritterKracker ​The Superiority of the Republics freedom TRUMPS the inferiority of Congress

Keonte ​Andrew Yang 2020

awildbill rightous ​We clearly need Master Jedi Trump another 4 years ,💯

HK ​Torrok 01 come on man don't be Rude

abc def ​soros antifa and dem leader,fact

Mo Hamhead ​How come the Democrats aren't talking about Mueller any more? It's like he never existed

360Nomad ​I AM THE SENATE

Ganesh Jayatpal ​🚩🚩🚩

American Patriot 1776 ​Andrew Yang 2020 I agree Keonte

Happy Voice ​Taxes are used to support a government that provides necessary public services, such as a police force, public education, and public infrastructure, "taxation is theft" is simply idiotic.

Roger Clinton ​F Dems

Drill Bit ​Spiny Norman​ It pays for these people. They all rich.

SAND BLAST ​DEMOCRATS WERE IS MULLER ?

Jenny Ward ​I I bet Nancy Pelosi cart and baby roaches and lice flee from her arse.

Jim Brauer ​YANG 2020 / FREEDOM DIVIDEND / M4A / Humanity First / Abundance Mindset / $1,000 per mo per adult / Solution to POVERTY = CASH in the hands of Parents and Teachers !!! YANG = YES !!! TRICKLE UP

Annika_green ​@American Patriot 1776?Yang?! You want the taxation called VALUE ADDED TAX???

no halo ​President Trump should read that deal again because democrats and republicans agree to it,there has to be a catch,and you can't trust crooked career politicians!

Why are you so Angry? ​No more alms.

L Yachty ​Majority vote TRUMP obviously

OurSavageGaming ​MAGA 2020 🦅🦅🦅

JESUS CHRIST ​OLD FOLKS WANTING MORE CONTROL PRETTY SOON WE WILL BE WALKING LIKE SOLDIERS

Alan Johnson ​All of them are thieves! If they are talking they are Lying! Drain the swamp!

AnabelleLee100 ​Universal Health Exploitation does not fix Costs. Caps on Medical Charges ONLY Way to Fix Healthcare.

Joey Big Things Poppin ​So Taxation on the American people is a crime

Nothing ​democrats hate all human rights. they are anti free speech, privacy, self defence, due process. I cant think of 1 human right democrats support

Danny Hemphill ​yang is a con man commie

Borng Jak ​ខ្ញុំ

KritterKracker ​Freedom from Congress' Bad Debt

Dawn Gray ​MY Indep VOTE goes to TRUMP2020 #IndependentsForTrump

David Hensley ​and the police force is a arm of corporate America that listens to those who make the laws they are the arm that inforces them

Fake News ​DEBT CEILING MATTERS. PASSING IT IS A GOOD THING

abc def ​deport the whole yang family,enemies of the state

Kodiak ​suddenly Durbin cares about the troops.

_______________________________________________________

OPINION:  Great, great news to hear.  The Senate is doing an outstanding job.  

Lets give them applaus👏

[pointlessdedication]

An untitled story

hi, this is something i wrote a long time ago, for further explanation you can see my previous post. this is only a small part of the whole fanfiction, but it's still 2,231 words, which might sound like too much. it's about dan and phil. hope you enjoy.

-----.-----

Phil

It has been almost a year since Dan was diagnosed with lung cancer. Today we are headed for the hospital to get the results of the tests that will determine if he is cancer free. Google says that there is a 92% of chance he is going to be fine, and for once, I'm wishing Google is right.

He has fallen asleep and his head is resting on my left shoulder, I can see his chest moving up and down. I look out the window to realize that we are a couple of blocks away so I start to wake him up. Summer in London can be disgustingly warm and today it’s particularly moist. Dan’s hair has gone really curly because of the sweat forming on his forehead. I reach for his shoulder and shake it lightly.

"Dan," I say. "Dan, wake up. We are almost there."

He sighs and slowly removes his head from my shoulder. He rubs his eyes and looks at the window. I mimic him.

When we get there I pay the driver and open the door for both Dan and I to get out, but being the stubborn man he is, he opens the door on his side. I don't want him to feel like I have started to treat him differently or that I pity him, but no matter how much time has passed since this started, I could never get used to seeing my best friend dying. I try to act normal anyway and I walk to the entrance of the hospital feeling a pinch of guilt in my stomach for letting him walk on his own but I know, I think, that's what he prefers. A year ago, when Dan was diagnosed, he was alone at the doctor's and he had entered into shock, later that day, when he arrived home and I asked what was wrong, he exploded. He looked at me for a couple of seconds before tears started streaming down his face, he grabbed the first thing his hand could reach and threw it against the wall, then continued to melt onto the floor and started mumbling every curse word he knew. I kneeled next to him and placed my hand on his shoulder, he turned his face to look at me; stood up, sat on the couch and told me everything the doctor had told him. The next day, when we went for his first session, the doctor explained that the cancer had spread from his right lung to the lymph nodes in the center of his chest, which meant that he was on stage two. He said that almost no one gets the proper attention in order to find the cancer whilst the tumor is still on the lung– I still don't know how that was supposed to make us feel better; I know it didn't. Stage two basically means that you are screwed, that you can't simply remove the tumor because it has already spread and made itself a very cozy home. A year ago when the doctor had told us he needed chemotherapy and probably radiotherapy it meant nothing to me, but today, I am quite the expert on cancer.

As we walk down the hall I can hear Dan's unsteady breathing behind me, I clench my fists, close my eyes and take a deep breath. I try my best to swallow the knot forming down my throat; I look back and smile at him. He raises his eyebrows and replies with a small side smile. It's maybe impolite to think it but he looks awful. There’s no life in his eyes and the dark circles under them definitely don't help. His lips are red and swollen because he just won't stop biting them, his face looks drained from life and he has lost a lot of weight.

We reach the doctor's office and I start biting my nails– that’s a new habit, and a terrible one considering I always make my fingers bleed before I realize I have gone too far. We sit on the chairs the doctor offers us as he sits on one himself. His hands are trembling, and he looks rather stressed. Is there a new patient? Has somebody died? A surgery gone wrong? I stop the negative thoughts and try to focus on my own trembling hands.

"Gentleman, hello, it is very nice to see you again," the doctor says as he plays with his pen. "I, we, spent the entire night looking at your results, talking about your case and how the treatment has affected the tumors forming in your chest, and I have both good and bad news. The tumors that were located on the lymph nodes have completely disappeared, unfortunately, the one that is all over your lung, is still there, and even though its growth has been slowed down, there is a big chance that the chemotherapy will not get rid of it. “I didn't want to say it like this but unfortunately, I cannot rename medical terms, you have failed the chemotherapy. And this, in no way, means that it is your fault, however, it is imperative that we find another solution to your problem before the tumor finds a new place to spread."

We are both quiet. I search the entirety of my brain for something appropriate to say but it is as if everything has been wiped. I command myself to speak but I cannot seem to find my mouth, I cannot feel my face and I cannot find the strength to move my lips or my tongue, I feel my eyes fall to the doctor's face and that's where they stay. I am unaware of the rest of my body. I can't feel anything. I can't hear, I can't speak.

"There are other solutions," the doctor continues, he sounds like he’s really far away, "now that the cancer that had spread outside the lung area has been eliminated the possibility of surgery is viable again, and actually, the only option."

"So, that means that now there is a possibility of removing the bit of the lung that has been affected," says Dan. He is sitting next to me but the ringing in my ears makes it difficult to hear him clearly.

"Well, not exactly, you see, even though the chemotherapy slowed down the development of the tumor, it did not stop it. Your lung is completely covered by the cancer," the doctor replies as he lays his eyes on me. I should say something.

"Which means that you would have to–" Dan is unable to finish the sentence because the doctor interrupts him.

"Remove your lung entirely. Yes."

I wasn't expecting this. I had been too positive, too careless; it is my fault that my best friend is losing his lung. I could've done more. I could’ve done something better.

"As I said before, this is nobody's fault, the treatment simply didn't work, but we have options Daniel, and I'm sure you are going to be okay," the doctor continues but he isn't looking at Dan he is looking at me and someone who talks just like me starts shouting.

"And how could you know?! You told us that the chemotherapy would most certainly work, but it didn't, did it? So what happens if you leave Dan with one lung and then it doesn't work? How can we trust such an incompetent doctor like y-" I feel a hand on my shoulder, the screaming voice was me, I had stood up, and was leaning towards the doctor, Dan is now holding me back with both hands. I sigh and leave the room quickly. Well done Phil, this is the moment you decide to explode, screaming at the guy you have trusted Dan's life to. Amazing. You are so stupid. Dan's long fingers wrap around my arm, I turn around to see him half smiling.

"It's going to be okay Phil, don't let out the rage monster no one is supposed to know about in front of the guy who gives me the drugs," he laughs.

"I am so sorry Dan, you shouldn’t be the one comforting me. I just, I can't lose you." I say as I get the credit card out of my pocket and walk towards the reecptionist. It feels like that sentence has lost all meaning after saying it so many times.

"Eh, here's the money for the exams and, you know, everything."

"The doctor would like to see Daniel this Friday, at what time should I make the appointment?" The receptionist asks in a very lovely Scottish accent.

"Uhh, Dan?” I ask as I turn to see him typing on his phone.

"Yeah, anything after 12 is okay,” he replies, not looking away from the screen.

"Okay dear, I have a free space at 12:30, is that alright?" She asks looking up at me with big green eyes.

I nod and see her type Dan’s name onto the computer.

"Thank you, I'll see you Friday then,” I say as I make my way towards the door.

–––––

We arrive to our apartment and I hold my breath when I hear Dan’s irregular breathing as he climbs up the stairs. Walking up the stairs is tiring enough; now imagine walking up the stairs when you have lung cancer. He goes straight to his room; there really is not much to do when you have cancer. I go to the kitchen and decide we deserve to eat some microwaved popcorn. I walk into his room with a bowl in one hand and a new anime we ordered a couple weeks ago in the other.

"Hey you. I brought some popcorn and, guess what arrived today? Do you fancy watching some anime?" I ask him as I sit on his bed.

"Wild Tuesday night plans, I see,” he says mockingly.

“Yeah, well, we are not usually very wild, now are we?” I say as I rest my back against his headboard. Dan arches his eyebrows and smirks.

“Don’t ever say that out loud again,” he answers as he closes his MacBook and gets up from his bed. "Come on, let’s watch it on the big TV."

We make our way to the living room and we sit on the same spots we've been sitting on for the past five years.

As we watch the TV I find my mind wandering, the specific cancer that was slowly killing Dan is called Non-Small Cell Lung Cancer Adenocarcinoma and it had been, for the most part, our only topic of conversation this past year. I remember the first couple of months perfectly, though I wish my brain had blocked them. We fought so much during the first days; it is hard to remember it now. When I first found out I was really supportive, told Dan I'd be there every single step of the way and that it was all going to work out alright but I wasn't really aware of what I was promising; I was in a state of denial that prevented me from understanding that my best friend was dying. With every visit to the doctor my positive attitude decayed and so did Dan's. I realize only when the subtitles become a blur that there are tears streaming down my face. I fake a yawn and dry what I can with the tips of my fingers as discretely as my clumsy hands allow me. I see Dan looking through the side of his eyes towards my direction so I excuse myself and head towards the bathroom. I inhale and exhale– once, twice, I do it until the knot down my throat is gone. This is something that has happened before, I sigh and wash my face trying to get rid of the red patches on my cheeks but my eyes are swollen enough for him to notice so I sit on the floor and wait for my face to return to its normal state. I can hear my steady breathing now that I’m calm and it troubles me knowing that Dan’s breathing will never be steady anymore. I dismiss the thought before I start crying again. I wonder what would be different if Dan wasn’t sick. We were incredibly happy, the years before he got ill had been the best for both of us, we went to Japan, we published two books, we hosted awards and events, we went on tour, we created a gaming channel, we had never been happier and then one day it was all over. As the days passed, Dan slowly became too ill to film and I was often too busy taking care of him, there wasn’t much I could talk about in videos anyway. The first couple of months our subscribers were incredibly supportive, they made trending topics, commented in all our recent videos, tweeted us, all of them telling us how this would be over soon and that they’d be with us till the end, but 11 months later I had lost around 250,000 subscribers and Dan had lost around 100,000. I don’t blame them though, not all of them care about us enough to stay with Dan and I through this rough patch. I stand up and open the door only to find Dan sitting in front of the door across the hallway.

[mydepression1997]

My Favorite People

As you can see by the title, this post is about my favorite people. The twist on this though is that my favorite people don’t know that I exist. My favorite people are Youtubers. They are able to make me laugh when I want to cry and to help me battle with my mind. Let me give you a backstory.

During my Freshmen year of college I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety. I had known for years that I suffered from this when I started to consider suicide my Freshmen year of High School four years earlier. I admitted my struggle to a friend and she made sure I sought out the help I needed. I have this irrational fear that I am an unloved individual that no one genuinely liked, and that they only talked to me because they pitted me. 

I never told my parents about any of this, and whenever I told them that I wasn’t happy, they would tell me to suck it up and that there were people who had it so much worse than me, but I knew that. Just because I didn’t have it as bad as others did not mean that I wasn’t hurting. 

School was a terrible experience for me. I was never beaten or anything like that, but I was excluded from everything unless they needed someone to do some kind of “crazy acting role” that “only I could pull off” and if it wasn’t that, then they would ask intrusive questions about my personal life, and me being stupid I would answer because I was desperate for friendship from people. The next thing I knew I would be the victim of the schools rumor mill. I even had a teacher who made fun of me constantly, but me being raised in a house that teaches to give absolute respect to authority to teachers, I never realized until my parents told me. It got to the point that I stated planning out my suicide again and again, but for some reason, I never executed. This is where my first Youtuber comes in.

Lilly Singh AKA IISuperwomanII was the first one I ever watched. She could break me out of any spiral I found myself in when I was being consumed by my depression. I discovered her one day in my Sophomore year of High School. Lilly was the lighthouse that helped me to hold on.

From her, one day a suggested video popped up this school year from someone who is absolutely hilarious, Phil Lester, AKA AmazingPhil was the next person to help me to crawl out of my hole of despair. And of course where Phil goes on the internet, Dan Howell AKA danisnotonfire soon follows. These two helped more than you can imagine. There was actually a day last week where I was rejected from an audition for one the only things I’m actually good at, and Dan saved the day with his video on quizes about him and Phil. 

From those two I found these next two through DanAndPhilGAMES, Mark Fischbach AKA Markiplier and Sean McLoughlin AKA Jacksepticeye. These two gamers helped make me cry with laughter when nothing else could. These two also are some of the most kind hearted people on the internet. Sean is always trying to connect with his fans and to make sure that his fanbase knows how much he loves and appreciates them. Mark is the exact same way and he even uses his fame to do live streams for charities, and the charities that he helps are ones who could do so much more with the money,  and not ones who already get x amount of money a day. 

My most recent find is someone who is actually just around my age, and his name is Ethan Nestor AKA CrankGamePlays. This guy just makes me feel so much better about life when I watch him. He is just plain adorable. He’s someone who cares so much about people and tries to constantly better the world he lives in. The first time I saw him was when he was doing a colab with Mark, and those two combined had me in hysterics because they were so funny. 

These people save me and so many others without knowing it everyday. They don't even try to make a big deal about themselves. They are just regular everyday people, they just happen to be famous. These guys are my light in the darkness that depression is. I know that none of them will never see or even read this, but I wanted to write out my thank you letter to them. Without them I don’t know where I’ld be today. I know that they get a thousand of these a day and they aren’t any special, but I still need the chance to thank them from the bottom of my heart for all that they do for the world.