#daisy calling coulson dad makes me feel things
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Just think about it, though...
Daisy is laying in a hospital bed, asleep. Coulson has a predisposition to stay at her bedside, especially if she hasn't woken up since coming out of surgery.
When she first wakes up, her brain feels like soup because those pain meds are working their magic almost a little too well. There's a man next to her bed, and she recognizes him as someone she feels safe with, so she says his name.
"Dad?"
Mmmmmm, that doesn't seem right. That's not his name. That's not usually what I call him.... Right?
It seems to catch his attention, though, as he smiles shyly and leans forward a bit, grabbing her hand gently. It's warm and solid and safe, encompassing her whole hand.
"Daisy? How're you feeling?"
How does she feel? Everything is hard to pinpoint, but she knows two things for sure.
"Sleepy, but better now that I've got pain meds and you here." Or maybe that's three things... She gives him a dopey smile, one that she thinks probably looks like one of the many she's seen on his face. It probably does look like his because the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree, right?... Or wait, is she even hi--
He seems to give a breathy chuckle, reaching a hand to move some of her loose hair behind her ear. The warmth seems to calm the soft pounding in her head, so she leans into it. And to her satisfaction, his hand seems to stay close, his slightly calloused thumb rubbing back and forth on her cheekbone.
His presence is warm and safe and all the things that make her drowsy... And she ends up falling back asleep on accident.
~~~~~
When Daisy wakes up again, she's more coherent -- the drugs were wearing off --, and Coulson is now sitting with her. She groans as she tries to wiggle her stiff body. The noise makes Coulson perk up, a little tentative, but still reaches for her hand. It felt... familiar. She decides she likes it, so she doesn't remove her hand from his.
"You're here."
"Of course. Pain meds wearing off?"
"Yeah, but I'll be okay for a little bit. It's good to feel a little pain. And I don't want to be too loopy... Which, do you know if I said anything crazy?" If Daisy didn't know any better, she would've missed the slightest bit of red in his cheeks as he seemed to smile to himself.
"Meh, nothin' too crazy... You may have called me, 'Dad.'"
That was him??? Oh....
"But... Honestly?... Is that too far from the truth?"
#just a lil drabble#a fluffy lil thing to enjoy bc we all need some rn#daisy calling coulson dad makes me feel things#and i feel like the only time she would genuinely call him dad is if she was under the influence of heavy heavy pain meds 😭💀#i dunno. it was just a thought and now you all have to suffer with it too#agents of shield#phil coulson#daisy johnson#fluff#minor whump ig???#phil coulson is daisy johnsons dad fr fr. fight me. 😤
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for the five things ask, 5 aos episodes:
Nothing personal (1x20)
Melinda (2x17)
Spacetime (3x15)
The Ghost (4x01)
Fun and Games (5x06)
Ooh, this is a good one! (also not me remembering everything about those episodes immediately 😂)
Anyway, I love every single one of these episodes so much, but I’m going to have to rank them, aren’t I?
So…for some of these, if you’d ask me this right after I finished watching the whole show, before any rewatches, I would’ve placed them higher. But going back and rewatching, while I still love the episodes, they’re greater when it’s the first time you’re seeing it, so I’m ranking based on what I like now, and what I would want to rewatch (and edit. And write fics about) now.
1. The Ghost (4.01)
It’s the one that’s easiest to rewatch. The angst is >>>> (I love it when my faves suffer) and it’s when Robbie first appears. We get Daisy and Elena interacting. We get a feel of what Daisy’s been going through (she’s a vigilante now!!!) and all of Ghost Rider’s scenes aren’t just mesmerizing to look at (seriously, flaming skull looks so good) but Gabriel Luna is such a good actor. We’re back to “Coulson is no longer director” which I LOVE, because it brings back certain obstacles from s1, where the team actually had to go BEHIND the director in order to save people, and Coulson is more of a rebel. Elena was just amazing in that episode. I love Daisy’s beanie. I love all of Daisy’s badass scenes and powers, and I love all her scenes with Robbie. There was a “mystery” feel to s4, and it started with the first episode. It was like a new era of the show beginning and the start of something new :)
2. Melinda (2.17)
We finally learn May’s backstory. Everything about those flashbacks, seeing more of Andrew (and Mildrew), seeing May from before, her fight scenes, her humour, and than the horrifying realization that it was the little girl the entire time? Holy crap, that was good, and completely makes everything we knew about May before, make sense. It was also very smart, the way it connected back to inhumans. Almost every mystery of s1 was connected, and idk but that was very satisfying to watch.
In the same episode, we get Daisy and Jiaying. (Which before s7 came out, I wouldn’t have been as appreciative of, but now I am.) Daisy finds her mom, after a lifetime of searching (and Jiaying finds her daughter, after decades). Unlike when she first comes face to face with her dad, her scene with Jiaying was so emotional, so beautiful, and they were both crying (which made me want to cry). We also get a little call back to s1 Daisy.
“Hoping for something and losing it, hurts more than never hoping for anything” (s1) and “deep down I think you knew [that I’m your mother]” “I was too afraid to hope” (s2)
Daisy opens up about her past a bit, about being sent away, about never spending more than 2 years anywhere (and she’s probably also emotional because she lost shield) which is also similar to that scene in s1, where she mentions she called a foster mom “mom” and how she gets sent away (but in this scene, she actually finds her mom!!!) it’s just…so bittersweet and amazing. Jiaying makes her promises (that she doesn’t keep, but they were GOOD in the moment) and Daisy finally feels at home in Afterlife. Jiaying helps her with her powers, and Daisy actually starts to control them without hurting herself. The “I moved a mountain scene”!!! Jiaying explaining Daisy’s powers, Lincoln being a sweetheart, Daisy making music. It was a good episode!
3. Spacetime (3.15)
Despite s3 being my least favourite season, (no matter the amount of meta I read or how often I rewatch episodes) this episode is one that I really love. I love how Daisy centric it is.
The entire thing about seeing visions and trying to prevent them from happening and being confused about them all, but each one making sense in the end? It was really well written.
The fact that it involves the whole team, that scene between Daisy and Coulson before she heads off. Coulson shooting the mirror, and us realizing it wouldn’t have made sense if he’d actually shot her! Coulson trying so hard to prevent it all (and failing spectacularly)
Daisy’s promise to protect Robin, how each scene led to the next, the final vision that leads to the rest of the season (who will die?) Daisy and May’s parallel fight scenes!
The entire team bonding while attempting to set up Daisy’s vision and act it out (that was so good!!) Fitz trying to explain science stuff but doing a terrible job, and he and Simmons disagreeing!
The whole first scene with the man calling out Daisy’s name and then dying in front of Daisy and her absolute horror and fear once she realizes the actual inhuman man was in danger. (Lincoln being very 💕 and holding her and trying to help her when she panics)
Many others have talked about this episode and why it’s so good (I haven’t done as good of a job 😅) but yeah it was just a really good episode. How it was written, and shot, and how each scene leads to the next, and how much focus Daisy got.
4. Nothing Personal (1.20)
I thought it would’ve been higher up in the list, because it has one of my favourite daisy scenes ever, but oh well.
I’m just going to talk about that scene specifically. One thing I will always love about this show and give it so much credit for, is how they DIDN’T make their female hero and protagonist “forgive” the terrible “misunderstood” attractive male character, or compromise her morals because she has feelings for him. Daisy cared for him, yes, but him ending up being a traitor, killing Koenig, and being HYDRA, was crossing a line, and immediately caused her to push him away and not want anything to do with him, her feelings be damned. Even after he admitted that he DOES actually care for her, her reaction is to turn away and say “I think I’m going to throw up” WHICH MAKES SENSE!!! That’s how a normal person would react to finding out a murderer and traitor has feelings for them. Ward’s look of utter shock and disbelief will NEVER not be funny. I’m so so glad the writers made THAT be her reaction (it was the moment I truly realized she wasn’t going to be written like all those other female protagonists written by men) because it was needed. Even despite the amount of Skyeward skippers, and despite the fact that them as a couple was something clearly the show was leading up to, they had her reject him (and keep rejecting him).
I loved when she hit him and insulted him. When she refused to help him, and her look of disgust and shock when he started going on and on about how “difficult it was for him”, 10/10!!
Her lines: “you did NOT just say that. It wasn’t PERSONAL? God, you might actually believe that. THAT, is the twisted logic they teach you even you sign up to be a nazi.”
and “I’m a survivor” “You are a serial killer”
and “because that was part of the mission, right? Just gonna kick back, and watch ME bleed, until it’s your turn to pull the trigger”
were perfect! Such perfect lines!! I was mentally applauding every word she said, every expression she made, that entire episode.
5. Fun & Games (5.06)
Unpopular opinion, I know, but I actually really loved and enjoyed the first half of s5. It’s disappointing what happened later, but that first half? Amazing. (Not many would agree lol)
In this episode, we finally get multiple reunions after the team’s been separated. It’s super easy to rewatch, feels fun (even while there are high stakes) and I just loved every moment. Daisy’s entire new look, and the arena fight. She looked so good and was such a badass. May also gets an arena fight, and like Daisy, was super badass despite being INJURED and having no powers! That whole scene where Daisy flies, Jemma slits a man’s throat, jumps with Fitz and they land and than all three run off to try and escape? It was amazing. Then they run into Deke, and both fitz and simmons are like immediately defending Daisy (for one episode, I thought fitz and simmons were back to being characters I enjoyed watching. I loved the dynamic between those three in that one episode alone). It was just really cool and the first time I watched it, I was definitely grinning because FINALLY Daisy and Jemma aren’t stuck with Kasius anymore.
So yeah, that’s my ranking. (I write too much XD) this was fun, thank you!
#aos#agents of shield#agents of s.h.i.e.l.d.#ask game#ryder616#daisy johnson#melinda may#jiaying#robbie reyes#elena rodriguez#long post
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Bad Reputation
Fandom: Marvel (High School AU)
Pairing: Chubby!Bucky x GN!Reader
Summary: For some reason, your high school’s resident bad boy, Bucky Barnes, seemed to have made it your personal mission to be a thorn in your side.
A/N: inspired by this gif set.
Your eyes glance up every so often to make sure your notes are correct as you scribble into your notebook. Mr. Coulson continues to talk about history and you're adamant to jot down every single thing he says.
You feel something hit the back of your head, but you ignore it. A minute goes by and you feel it again, along with a "pssst!"
You shake your head and try to keep your focus. Something something 1894-
"Hey," you jolt when you hear a whisper and a tap on your shoulder.
You look over your shoulder and see James "Bucky" Barnes now sitting the seat behind you that was previously occupied by Brunnihilde, "What, James?" you hiss.
James, or Bucky as he likes to be called, smirked at his first name. Not many got away with calling him that, but you did.
"Wanna hang out after school?"
You turn back around to continue taking notes, "Don't you have detention...again?"
He scoffs, "Yeah, but I'll skip it for you."
"Pass," you mumble.
You hear him sigh and lean back, "Suit yourself." Minutes pass and you turn back around and Brunnhilde is back in her seat.
________________
When you walk out of class, Bucky is waiting for you by the door. You ignore him as you walk down the hall to your next class. He follows closely behind, you hear the creaking of his leather jacket that he usually wears.
"Leave me alone, James."
Bucky rushes around to stand in front of you, stopping you in your path, "Y/N, why do you hate me so much?"
"Because you're annoying, you're a troublemaker, you never know when to shut up you, you-"
"Jeez. Alright. Damn."
"I have to go to class, James," you walk around him and continue your journey.
He catches up to you again, "I'll walk you!"
"No, thanks."
You continue to head to class, but Bucky doesn't follow this time. He stops in the hall sighing and pushing his hands into his distressed jeans. He looks down dejectedly and heads in the other direction to his class.
The bell already rang by the time he steps into class. Ms. Hill writes him off and he, to no one's surprise, get detention yet again for having three tardies in a row.
He slumps into his seat behind his best friend, Steve, and sighs. As Steve is writing notes, he murmurs only low enough for Bucky to hear, "No luck?"
"Nope," Bucky murmurs back. He looks down and looks how his black t-shirt clings to his round belly. He pats it and sighs, "Do you think they'd like me if maybe I wasn't so chubby?"
"Y/N may not like you, but they're not shallow, Buck."
"I just don't get it. Why don't they like me?"
"Probably because you annoy them so much," Steve answers with a smirk, which earns him a flick to the ear.
"Ow!"
"Steve, is there something you'd like to share with the class?"
He shakes his head, "No, ma'am."
Ms. Hill goes back to giving her lecture and Steve hisses, "Quick being a jerk."
"I'll quit being a jerk if you quit being a punk, you punk," Bucky retorts with an amused grin.
___________________
You head to your usual table where Scott, Hope, Luis, Carol, Brunnhilde, and yourself usually eat.
You sit in between Scott and Carol with a sigh. It's Tuesday, but you already want the week to be over. Carol leans in and whispers to you, "Don't be alarmed, but Bucky's been looking at you since you walked over here."
You groan and let your head fall onto the lunch table, "Why can't he just leave me alone?"
"Because he likes you," Hope answers.
You snort, "More like he likes to annoy me. I don't want anything to do with him. Bad guys like that are up to know good. I don't have time for that."
"I like Bucky," Scott speaks up with a smile, "He's cool."
"You just like him because he gave you a nickname," Hope replies with knowing smirk.
"He's a cool guy!"
You hear a burst of laughter and you look up to see Bucky throwing food at Clint and Sam two tables down.
You roll your eyes and pull out your own lunch. As soon as you're about to take a bite, you hear "WATCH OUT!" and you're hit in the face with a piece of pizza.
Everyone suddenly goes silent. You look up and see Bucky's look of horror. He's immediately rushing over to you, "Y/N! I am SO sorry! I didn't mean to-"
"It's okay, James." you say calmly.
He looks at you in surprise, "Wait, really?"
You take Scott's cupcake that he got from Gamora and said, "NOPE!" and smashed it onto his face.
He wipes away the frosting and smushed cake, and smirked, "That's how it's gonna be? Fine." he grabs your tupperware of pasta and dumps it over your head, "FOOD FIGHT!"
Everyone begins to scatter and starts throwing their food left and right. You grab your food, Scott's food, Luis' food, any food you can get your hands on and throwing them to Bucky.
"YOU'RE SUCH AN ASS!" you yell at him.
"AND YOU'RE A STUCK UP!"
The doors to the cafeteria burst open and the principal, Mr. Fury, yells, "EVERYONE FREEZE." And you all do.
You're seething, glaring at Bucky, chest heaving.
"Who's responsible for this, huh?"
Everyone points to you and Bucky who are in a more isolated area of the cafeteria. Fury, watching where he stepped, marched over to you. He points to Bucky, "Barnes." and then you, "L/N, my office. Now."
________________
Two weeks. Detention for a whole two weeks. You couldn't believe this! Because of Bucky, your record was no longer clean. Your dislikeness towards Bucky just grew after that.
After school, you marched into the cafeteria where you'd be helping the lunch faculty.
"Alright James and Y/N, you'll help with dishes. You can discuss who will wash and who will dry."
Without looking at Bucky you head to the sink, "I'll wash."
Bucky cautiously follows you and stands by your side waiting for you hand him washed dishes.
"Y/N-"
"Don't talk to me, James."
"I'm sorry," he murmurs in a painted tone, "I really didn't mean to throw that pizza at you."
"Why are you like this?!" you drop the dishes back into the sink, "Why must you annoy me and bother me every chance you get?!"
"I-I don't mean to-"
"Bullshit, Barnes!"
"I like you, okay?! I like you and I-I don't know what to do! The only time you look at me or talk to me is when I bother you and I just-I just want you to talk to me, Y/N. To see me."
"Why me? There's plenty other people who'd rather have your attention!"
"I don't know. There's just something about you. You're sweet and smart. You're caring. I know-I know something like me doesn't deserve the attention from someone like you, but I can't help it."
You snort, "You don't know me though. Not really."
"Well, maybe I can get to know you now? Ya know, since you and I will spending a lot of time together here?"
"We'll see," you answer before heading back to doing dishes.
__________________
After a week of detention, you and Bucky were more civilized. You got to know each other a little bit more. You found out that he wanted to take over his dad's construction company, that he wanted to help Steve get into NYU with the money he's been earning from working with his dad.
Bucky learned that you wanted to go to school for journalism and that you have a pet bunny named Floppy.
You found out that Bucky knows Celine Dion's music very well because his mom loves her.
He found out that you wanted to be on Broadway when you were younger, but realized you had bad stage fright.
Whenever you two saw each other in class or in the halls, you didn't turn in the other direction. You gave each other a nod and a polite smile.
Then...the flowers started happening.
You walked into Mr. Coulson's classroom and found a daisy with a note next to it. You picked up the note and it read:
I saw this cute flower and thought of you. Have a good day.
-JB
You looked at the back of the classroom to where Bucky usually sat, but he wasn't there. You snort to yourself and roll your eyes. He's probably going to late, per usual.
A few minutes before class started, Bucky waltzed in and sat in the empty seat beside you. He pulls out a notebook and pencil. He writes the date at the top and looks up at the front of the class to see if there was anything on the whiteboard.
He then turns to you and smirks, "Hi."
"Hi. Thanks for the flower."
"You're welcome," he looks down at his notebook and then looks up to see you still staring at him. He chuckles, "What?"
"You're early to class and prepared....are you feeling okay?" you lean in, feeling his head with the back of his hand.
You swats your hand away, "Quit it! I'm fine! Just turning over a new leaf. I'm gonna be a changed man, Y/N."
"Okaaaay?"
Your school day went by fast. One moment you were in your first class and the next you're in the cafeteria helping clean the kitchen.
"So...what's the real reason you're suddenly trying to be a good student?"
"Does there have to be a reason?" Bucky asks as he wipes down the counters.
"There's a reason for everything, Bucky." you freeze and so does Bucky. You look up and he's looking way too smug for your liking, "It was a slip of the tongue."
"You called me, Bucky."
"It won't happen again."
"Can I hear it again?"
"Nope."
"Please?"
"Hell no."
"Okay...I do like it when you call me James, though. Just so you know." he looks at you with a soft stare and an equally soft smile.
You cleared your throat and went back to refilling the fridge with milk, "Anyway, the reason?"
Bucky sighs and walks over to you, resting against a counter as you work, "Had a meeting with Fury. Said if I don't improve on my grades, I'm gonna get held back. Means I can't pursue my goals with taking over my dad's business, can't help Stevie with school. I gotta be better."
You pause and then ask, "Do you....want some help?"
"Um...I'd like some, but you don't have to. I can't ask-"
"You're not asking, James. I'm offering."
"Sure."
So after school, while you and Bucky served your detention, you helped him study.
Eventually, your detention was over, but that didn't stop you from helping Bucky. During lunch, you two would be in the library. You two would study at the park near your house. You soon began to show you his grades and they were definitely improving.
When Bucky got his first A in a long time, you took him out to lunch to celebrate.
You guys went to the local café in your neighborhood, getting burger, fries, and shakes.
You lifted up your shake, "Congrats, James, to your first A in a logn time!"
Bucky held up his own and clinked it to yours, "And to you, Y/N, because I wouldn't have done it without you."
"Guess we make a great team, huh?"
Bucky smiles that smile that you've noticed he only does with you, "Yeah...we do."
____________
"You've been spending a lot of time with Bucky for someone who hates him," Carol states as you join them at the lunch table after what seemed like forever.
You rolled your eyes as you sat down, "I don't hate him. I never did, honestly. Just strongly disliked! But anyway, we're good now. Bonded a lot during detention and then I was tutoring him. We're....friends now."
"Just friends?" Brunnhilde asked.
"Yup. Just friends!"
After school, Bucky is waiting for you by your car.
He nervously wipes his sweaty palms down his round belly and runs a hand through his hair, "Um, hey."
"Hey, what's up?"
"I just wanted to let you know something. You know my feelings for you and, honestly, they haven't changed. In fact, they've only grown since we've been spending so much time together. And, there's another reason why I wanted to do better in school...and that's you."
"Me?"
"I wanted to be better for you, so I can show you that I'm not just that punk ass kid that doesn't care about anything and anyone. That I'm more than just my bad reputation. And, I think this past month, I've done a pretty good job at showing that. But anyway, I was wondering, if you feel the same? And if you wanna go on a date sometime?"
His confession floored you. You didn't expect him to say any of this, "James, I-I won't lie, that I have some feelings for you, but it-it takes a lot more than this for me to like someone. I mean, we just became friends. And while I do like how you've changed, I just-there's more to it than just that."
He nods and clears his throat, "Right. Got it. I'm sorry-"
"Don't be," you grab hold of his arm, "Maybe...we can just be friends for now and see how it goes?"
He nods, "Yeah. Okay. You set the pace and I'll follow, Y/N. I'd rather have you as a friend than not at all."
"I can't promise anything would come from this."
"I know. I'm just....glad you finally see me."
You smile at him with softness in your eyes, "I'm glad I finally see you too."
#bucky barnes#bucky x reader#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes imagine#marvel#au#marvel au#high school au#gn!reader#gender neutral!reader#chubby!bucky
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DJAW21 - Day 2: Names
Let's talk Mary Sue Poots, Destroyer of Worlds 🤭
Back when S1 was airing, "Skye" was labeled a Mary Sue, which, let's be real, is usually code for "I don't like that this female character is prominent".
So the writers named her Mary Sue, just to mess with us.
8 years and four months later, it's still hilarious to me how you can pick any Mary Sue criterion, other than female and competent - gifted, really - and she fails every single one. She has weaknesses, flaws (or so they tell me 😁), makes mistakes and suffers the consequences (oh man, does she suffer), of hers and others' actions all the time. The narrative has in fact gone out of its way more than once to punish her for things out of her control or when she was actually right.
A more ill-suited name, she couldn't have had, and that's the point: it wasn't her name, she never chose it, it's not her.
Then there's Poots. Which in itself is a perfectly serviceable name. It sounds a little goofy but in a cute way. It's just not the name for a fictional hero, with apologies to all the heroic Poots out there.
Someone at St. Agnes picked it for a kid they knew had an uphill battle just to be, let alone become. It's a fake name that was imposed on her, reflective of how others saw her, not of who she is.
Skye, on the other hand, is a name with some pizzazz, the kind a kid who dares to hope big despite the world crushing her hope every time might choose to redefine herself: not the unwanted orphan but the cool, sassy hacktivist who wants to make a difference.
Daisy Johnson doesn't quite mesh with this pattern of irony and meaning, being a name inherited from other creatives - Daisy's first dad is Brian Michael Bendis, so in a way she's the stepsister of Jessica Jones and Miles Morales and isn't that the coolest thing? - but that works well, too. Because it is an inheritance, the name given by parents Daisy had no recollection of, who she only met briefly and at their worst. It's a name that was chosen for her, yes, but that she also got to choose and reclaim (the shout out to the amazing fanfic by @stilltryingtowrite is absolutely intended), after searching for it for two decades. And that means everything.
Quake is awesome, regardless of what a certain 1950s gentleman thinks (see, he isn't completely perfect 😁). Short and to the point, an ideal codename if SHIELD bothered to use those. And Daisy's continuous discomfort with it - even in S7 she feels like she has to justify it: "the press called me that" - is just the cherry on top: the superheroes' fangirl got superpowers and now cringes at the fanfare surrounding superheroes (meanwhile Coulson is probably collecting all the merch 😁).
Destroyer of Worlds was a curse that she turned into a declaration of power. Iconic stuff. It probably should have happened in a different context, as Kasius Sr. is the most inconsequential of her many offenders during Season 5, but it's still emblematic of her refusal to let others define who she is.
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i've heard of a quote once before. something along the lines of a girl would fall for someone who has similar qualities to her father.
and i feel like it's true for daisy? okay sans miles and ward because technically daisy didn't have a father-figure (that we know of) at the time. but i think it kinda shows how not knowing what a good relationship and what a good man is like, led her to be attracted to men like miles and ward. because she grew up on the move. she had different foster homes to keep her safe. it shows how she lacks stability. maybe that's why she was attracted to 'bad boys'. because she's used to the instability of life.
then there's lincoln. who's a good guy with a bad past. obviously daisy was attracted to him. i mean, who wouldn't? someone who turned himself around after going down a rabbit hole? someone who got better? he's great. and what's really cool is that i feel like there are similarities between lincoln and calvin, daisy's biological father. they're both doctors, lincoln was training in a hospital, and calvin's a vet. both of them did something bad in their pasts, but in the end, they had redeemed themselves. lincoln stopped drinking (i think), and calvin saved daisy. the similarity is insane.
daisy fell for lincoln, not because he has similar qualities to her father, of course. but i just think that it's interesting.
a girl would fall for someone who has similar qualities to her father.
now, we have daniel sousa. daniel freaking sousa (and that blue shirt, let me tell you, i could go on and on, but i won't). so, here's danny-boy, someone who might just be inherently good, and who would try to do good wherever he goes, seeing daisy as this amazing, strong woman and he fell for her. and daisy? i feel like she never thought she would fall for someone after lincoln, especially someone who's that solid and steady. because all her life, all she had known was move move move.
see, here's the interesting bit. daniel sousa is very similar to season 1 coulson and just coulson in general. i mean, coulson looked up to men like sousa and steve rogers. so obviously, there's plenty of similarities there. for one, their goodness. like damn. they're just someone who wants to do good with their life. the both of them dedicated their lives to shield. literally. for them both. they took care of daisy when she's hurt (when ian quinn shot her and when malick did a number on her; which, crazy parallel, right? i mean, both coulson (granted the whole team carried her, but coulson's the one who found her) and sousa carried her into the hyperbaric chamber). coulson's the first person who believed in her. and that is very important to daisy. coulson is very important to daisy. he's her father in everything but blood. and sousa? well, he's the first person in a long time who wants nothing but to support her. to pick her back up when she ran into that brick wall. the two men, the two similar men, those two dorks (as daisy would say), believe in her, took care of her, and would support her (yes, fitz and mack and i'm sure hunter, and other good men in her life would probably do the same. but the similarity between sousa and coulson's crazy, no? just me?).
thing is, coulson and sousa oozes stability. and steadfastness. they're both solid. coulson brought daisy into shield, sousa was in shield ever since shield was ssr (and maybe helped peggy in building shield, i think?), and shield became her family. her home. it gave her everything that she didn't have when she was mary sue poots. heck, when she was still skye before shield. it's a crazy full circle moment when you realize that season 1 coulson found daisy, took her in, set her on the right path, took care of her, and she became a superhero who saves the world. and then season 7 sousa just wanted to make sure that she took care of herself because how could she save the world if she's consistently reckless about her own health and well-being? sousa took it upon himself to be there beside her, and be her back up. coulson brought her in this new journey that involved shield (which sousa was in since the very beginning) and now sousa's the one who's going on this next journey with daisy (probably sword). hence, full circle. right?
and what's funny is that in 7x13, the last person daisy saw before she took off the framework device was coulson, her dad. and the first person she saw after the call was sousa, her boyfriend, the right one (as chloe bennett once said). it's cool because it's like coulson's handing daisy off to sousa even though they're not in the same physical realm at the time.
a girl would fall for someone who has similar qualities to her father.
daisy has 2 fathers. calvin, and coulson. she has 2 great loves of her life. lincoln, and sousa. (p.s. i just laughed at how funny it is that calvin and lincoln were called by their first name, while coulson and sousa were called by their last name.) and the similarities between calvin and lincoln are there. so are the similarities between coulson and sousa. another funny thing is that calvin and lincoln kind of symbolizes her past. the way she was looking for her family, for jiaying and calvin. but then coulson and sousa kind of represents her present and future. the way she found her family in shield (coulson, may, fitzsimmons, mack, yo-yo, etc.), and now have a life with her boyfriend (her endgame), and her biological sister.
of course, without miles, ward and lincoln, daisy wouldn't be where she is right now. exploring space with her sister and the man she loves. i'm not discounting that fact. i just think that it's interesting that this saying, a girl would fall for someone who has similar qualities to her father, could somehow be applied to daisy.
anyways, thanks for reading all the way through. tell me your thoughts! oh! and also, could someone make like a gif or some sort of visual edit of the parallels between coulson and sousa (maybe someone already did)? i just thought how cool that would be. so yeah. have a nice day or night!
#sorry for the long ass post#aos#agents of shield#daisy johnson#daniel sousa#phil coulson#dousy#timequake#daisysous#sousy#have anyone heard of that quote/saying before though?#im having an aos withdrawal#hence the whole analysis of well this post#i like to ramble dont i?
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The Irresistible Force Paradox
Fandom: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.
Characters: Skye (Daisy Johnson) x Grant Ward (Skyeward)
Rating: T (mild smut, nothing explicit)
Summary: Skye's feelings about Ward are complicated. Ward's feelings for Skye are very simple. Immovable object meet unstoppable force. Set somewhere in the first half of Season Two.
Word Count: 1.6k | 1/?
ao3 || ff.net || wattpad || quotev
The moment Skye kisses Ward, she knows she’s screwed – figuratively at the very least. Because if she’s close enough to literally have his lips on hers she should be trying to bring him in, or kill him. Instead, she’s letting him crowd her up against the dresser in this dingy motel room, thanking all the powers that be that she turned her comm off.
Because she’s supposed to be on a stakeout right now, waiting for a guy claiming to be selling SHIELD tech, but now she’s hoping he won’t show up. Ward is kissing her in his all-consuming passion concentrated to a single point way, and as much as she hates him – and she does, she really does – he’s good at it. He’s brazenly desperate, the way his hands grip her body, the way he pulls her lower lip between his own like he might die if she stops him. Which she should, of course she should. Then he lifts her so she’s sitting on the dresser and slips his tongue into her mouth and fuck.
She opens her legs so he can stand between them and tangles her fingers through his hair.
His hand finds the gun tucked into the waistband of her pants and seems to make a grab for it. Skye pushes off the dresser, using her full body weight to tackle him to the floor. They land with a thump, but before Skye can react, Ward has moved to pin her to the ground.
“What was that for?” he asks.
“Think you can distract me that easily?” she says, trying and failing to push him off. “I’m a lot harder to kill than I used to be.”
“I’m not trying to kill you,” he says, simply. He’s only slightly out of breath and Skye tries to curb her heavy breathing.
“Then what are you trying to do?” She already knows of course; it’s very difficult to miss it in his eyes.
“You know,” he says because he’s still too good at reading her for comfort.
“Yeah, well, that sucks for you,” she says.
He looks at her for a long moment, then slowly stands up, steps back, not taking his eyes from her for a moment. Skye rises, cautiously, watching Ward in return like he’s a wild animal she came across in the forest. She steps to the side, toward the door, making sure to keep her back away from Ward.
“You can leave, or call the team,” he says. The team, not your team, as though he still has some connection to them. “Or you can stay.”
You can stay, if you want. Words he said to her forever ago. He had been reaching out to her then too – or, in actuality – doing what double agents do, getting her to like him. But here, now, there are no pretenses. She knows who he is. So really, if you look at it that way, it isn’t as bad as it seems.
She takes out her earpiece and sets it on the dresser. He raises his eyebrows.
“Don’t make me say it out loud,” she tells him, and he shrugs and closes the distance once more.
Before finding out about Ward, she had imagined scenarios similar to this one; being on a stakeout with Ward, things getting a little steamy. In her fantasies, this would eventually lead to them being together – but in secret of course, because agents aren’t supposed to fraternize. Coulson would give an overprotective dad speech, May would give an overprotective mom stare, and then she and Ward would plot to get Fitzsimmons together.
In reality, it’s different because none of them can ever know. She wouldn’t be able to stand the way Fitzsimmons would look at her if they found out she had spent the afternoon with her tongue down the throat of the man who had tried to kill them. Who had killed so many people. And, god, May and Coulson, too, they’d all be so disappointed… She would never forget the time they had caught her with Miles – and this is so much worse.
She pushes them from her mind because if she’s going to do this stupid, terrible, reckless thing, she might as well enjoy it. Because even though he’s evil, Ward is also hot. And he’s a spy, which means that he’s had a lot of experience – obviously – and confidence has always looked good on him.
Another thing that looks good on him: no clothes. Like, she knows what he looks like, but seeing through x-ray glasses is very different from seeing in the flesh.
He’s seen her before as well. The shower on the Bus is only a short dash from her bunk, but the Bus is only so big, and she has a bad habit of forgetting a towel and risking the skimpy scurry, and Ward has a bad habit of being in places unexpectedly. So the sight isn’t exactly new.
But that doesn’t stop him from looking at her the way people look at the stars, or sculptures in museums. He actually pulls back to look at her, and it’s pissing her off a little because this is supposed to be hate sex. They’re on opposite sides here – and not in the star-crossed lovers way, but in the diametrically opposed sort of way.
He’s not supposed to touch her gently or adoringly, he’s supposed to grab her hard and fuck her fast while they trade insults. He’s supposed to leave finger-shaped bruises and mouth shaped marks on her, not brush her hair behind her ear.
So she sets her jaw and shoves him toward the bed. He tilts his head, as though to say Someone’s eager.
“I don’t have all day,” she says, climbing onto the bed. “They’ll worry.”
He approaches the side of the bed. “If you don’t want t–”
“Shut up,” she says and pulls him down on top of her.
His weight on her is perfect and he wastes no time now. He takes her apart with skill and the utmost concentration. With every touch, Skye realizes how much he knows about her, things he has intuited that she likes. And it’s agonizingly intense, but not in a we hate each other and need to fuck out the tension way.
Skye tries to avoid his eyes in the beginning but finds herself seeking them out as she bites back a cry at her pinnacle. Then she pulls him into a kiss so she can avoid them again, as though eye contact is too intimate.
He might whisper three terrifying words as he comes. She isn’t sure, or maybe she’s just choosing to mishear him.
Ward rolls over, lies beside her, as Skye comes back to herself. She stares at the ceiling, hearing his breathing even out. She swallows hard and waits for him to say something.
It’s quiet for a long time.
He reaches out for her, and she pushes his hand away. She can feel his eyes on her but refuses to look at him, keeping her gaze on the ceiling. He shifts and sighs deeply.
“Do you… want to talk about it?” he asks finally.
Skye rolls her eyes. She steals a glance at him and immediately regrets it. His hair is messy and his eyes are soft and he looks… like a guy. Like just some guy. Some guy who she just slept with, who likes her, who hopes she likes him back.
“I’m gonna shower,” she says, getting up. She collects her clothes from where they are scattered on the floor and closes the bathroom door behind her. She hugs the bundle to her chest and leans against the door, staring at her reflection in the mirror. She expects herself to feel sick, to have an adverse reaction to sleeping with a man she should, by any logic, despise.
But the truth is that she doesn’t hate him. She hates what he does – and what he did – but she doesn’t hate him. She understands him, more than she would admit to anyone. Hell, under different circumstances, she could’ve been him. It could’ve been him standing in this bathroom, conflicted, while she lies in bed, loving him.
Because he does. Love her, that is. And doesn’t that mean that he’s not totally evil and irredeemable?
She still doesn’t know what to say when she steps back into the room, dressed, with her wet hair soaking through her top.
In the bed, Ward snores quietly, arm outstretched to where she had lain. And he still looks like a regular guy. His features are softer in sleep, more open. She watches him for a moment, finding herself wishing for the billionth time that they’d met under different circumstances.
Outside, the sky is getting dark. She crosses the room and puts her comm back in her ear. To her relief, there are no voices worried about her.
“Hey, guys,” she says quietly. “I don’t think this guy is gonna show.”
“You’re probably right,” Coulson says. “Why don’t you drive back, and we’ll regroup.”
“Sounds good.”
“Skye?” he asks, and she finds herself glancing over at Ward’s sleeping body. “Are you alright? You sound…”
“Nah, I’m fine,” she says quickly. “Stakeouts just make me sleepy, that’s all.”
“All right, see you soon.”
“Yeah, see you.”
She can’t tear her eyes away from Ward. The fact that he let himself fall asleep with her here. It’s unfathomable. And stupid. She could call for backup and they could take him in. She could kill him, shoot him where he lies.
He could be faking, to see how she’ll react, but somehow, she doubts it. This is just how he operates with her. He makes dumb decisions because of how he feels about her.
And she’s about to make a very dumb decision as well, but not because of what she feels.
Because of how she doesn’t feel.
She doesn’t hate Ward.
It’s about the only thing she knows for sure when it comes to him.
She looks back at him one more time and then closes the motel room door behind her.
#skyeward#agents of shield#daisy johnson#skye#skye aos#grant ward#my writing#amwriting#wattpad#quotev#ff.net#wattpadlife#ao3#writing#[ the irresistible force paradox ]
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Wtf is a Selfie??
some dousy fluff/ anst for my favs. it’s been sooo long since i’ve written but i worked really hard on this and i hope y’all like it!
please give it sum love and/ or feedback <3!
The team was getting ready for their goodbye dinner together. Just one last night of dinner and drinks, and then they’d go their different ways.
Daisy was obviously feeling emotional, and Sousa knew this. He came to check on her in her room.
He stood outside her door, took a deep breathe, and, in classic Danial Sousa fashion, knocked.
“Come in!”
When he opened the door, her back was to him, and she was struggling with the zipper on her dress.
“Here. Let me help you with that.” he came to help her.
“Oh. Thanks Sousa.” Daisy said. She felt her cheeks turn red.
Sousa hadn’t realized how nice she looked. Her blond hair was in loose waves down her back, and when she turned to face him, he saw she was wearing eyeliner and mascara that made her brown eyes pop. Blush tinted her cheeks.
They locked eyes, and she looked at the floor shyly.
“Thanks”, she practically whispered. Dammit why couldn’t she just act normal around him.
There was an awkward silence. Daniel looked around her room as she studied the floor.
After a moment, he brushed past her to look at the bedside table.
“Who’s this?” he asked.
Daisy followed his gaze. Sitting on her bedside table were three different picture frames and a jewelry box.
The largest picture was a frame hanging on the wall behind the table, the two others sitting in front of it. One was a picture of Daisy and Coulson, beaming at whoever the cameraman (or woman) was. The picture looked fairly recent.
Sousa had picked up the smaller frame. It was an older picture, evident by Daisy’s brunette and banged hair. The picture was obviously taken by someone else, and Daisy was looking at whoever might be to the left of the camera man. There was a man next to her, who was taller and older, and he was looking right into the camera. they were both wearing the same, almost sad looking smile. This is what first tipped Sousa to who this man might be. She took the frame from his hand.
“Cal” and after a beat, “my dad”.
Sousa, in all honesty, didn't know what to say. Just a small “Oh.” spilled his mouth.
Daisy had never talked about her dad. She had told Sousa about her mom, Jiaying, but not much outside of the story that she had shared with him about her suffering at the hands of Whitehall.
“He um,” she was obviously trying to find the right words. Did she even want to go down this path with him?
After a moment of thinking, she said, “he killed my mom… to save me”.
Another “Oh” from Sousa.
“Daisy, I’m so sor-”
“No, it's fine. I-” she quickly blinked away tears, “it was a while ago.” there was a beat, and then,
“Plus it was nice to talk to her again. And I wouldn't have without you… you giving me a little push.” she was smiling fondly now. She put the picture back.
“About that. I was going to apologize. i feel bad, i could tell it was hard for you and then what happened next-”
“No, no. i-” she turned to smile at him. “I was glad.” she reassured him.
She hadn't realized how close they were to each other. “Thanks for that”, she said in a whisper.
Their eyes locked, and she could feel herself blushing under his gaze. Her back ended up against the table, him facing her and the rest of the pictures. He was smiling at her, they were moving closer to each other, Daisy looked down at his lips, and-
“Is that the rest of the team?” he wasn't looking at her anymore, but in fact the largest picture frame hanging on the wall behind her.
She sighed to herself and closed her eyes.
In it was a picture of the team, Coulson, May, Jemma, Fitz, Yo-yo, Mack, a taller woman, and another man were all beaming at the camera. Again, Sousa could tell the picture was older from Daisy's hair, which was now in a dark bob. She was standing in the middle of everyone, holding the camera.
“Uh yea,” Daisy smiled to herself about how awkward he was. What a dork.
“That's Bobbi. And that's Hunter.” she said, pointing at the respective characters.
“They were all part of SHIELD at one point. We were pretty close.” she was smiling fondly now.
She snapped out of her memories that flooded back to her to glance up at Sousa, who, to her surprise, was studying the picture intently.
She looked at the picture, then back to him, then back to the picture again, trying to figure out what was irking him.
“Whatt are you looking at?” she said, a teasing tone in her voice.
“How was this taken? Are you holding the camera? Wouldn’t that be heavy?”
She tried her best to stifle her laugh. She felt bad giggling at him, but she couldn't help it, he was such an old man.
“Uhh yeah. It's called a selfie. Here, i’ll show you.”
She took her phone out of her back pocket and opened the camera app. She held the phone up and moved closer to him in order to fit them both into the small frame. She blushed as she felt his hand snake around her waist.
“Smile,” she told him
With a *click* she had taken the picture. She brought the phone down to inspect the selfie to her liking.
Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Sousa do the same. Again, her face filled with heat as she felt how close he was. His hand was still around her waist.
“We look-,” he hesitated to find the right word, “we look good.” and a pause,
“You look good”.
She blushed. Hard.
“Thanks”, she said, smiling up at him. Their faces were once again close to each other, and the spot where his hand reached touched a bit of skin on her waist seemed to be on fire. Again, they leaned closer. She wanted to kiss him so bad she could scream-
“Hey guys were about to- ohhh what's going on in here!?” Came a British voice from the door. Simmons.
Sousa quickly ducked his head to hide his smile. Daisy turned to face her, embarrassment written all over her face. But she was smiling.
“Yea uhh. We’re about ready.” she said as she busied herself finding her necklace on the table next to the picture she had just put down.
Simmons backed out of the door to leave, sharing a smile with Sousa. He was also obviously a little embarrassed, but a quick wink from the doctor reassured him.
He smiled at the floor. He was glad he had found some friends in this weird place. Plus he had met Daisy, which was obviously going well-
“Do you think you could help me put this on?” Daisy asked him.
“Course.” he answered.
Even when their hands touched when slipping the necklace between them Daisy’s stomach flipped flopped. She turned around and moved her long hair out of the way.
He clasped the necklace around her neck.
She hurried herself with getting her shoes on, and Sousa struggled to put what he wanted to say to her in words. It took Daisy to get to her second shoe (white nike air forces, very practical) until he spoke.
“I know you've been hurt and i- i just wanted to let you know that i'm here for you. To talk i mean.” he mustered out.��
She paused, still looking at her shoelace. Shit he thought. He had gone too far. Too fast. Too fast.
She finally looked up at him. God why was it so hard to read her facial expression. He had overstepped, he felt it-
She smiled. It was faint. But it was there. She stood and brushed herself off, shoelace forgotten. She paused before starting.
“Yeah its- its been a hard run these last couple of years. I've lost-” she paused to catch her breath- “I've lost, i don't even know how many people. People I care about. People i- i love.”
He glanced away at this. Mack had mentioned a boyfriend when they were talking about his own ex, Peggy, the other day. Lincoln, he remembered.
Before he could say anything else, she took a step closer. But instead of leaning in for a kiss, she put her head on his shoulder. A hug. That she desperately needed.
He hugged her back and closed his eyes. He desperately needed this. They had both gone through a lot, their hearts were worn. But they had each other, and they were grateful. They stood there for a minute, but it felt like seconds until they were interrupted, again.
A loud pounding came from the door, making them both jump.
“Come on guys, no funny business. We need to go soon.” it was Mack.
Daisy rolled her eyes and she pulled away. They both giggled, and she went to her closet for a purse.
When she had gotten all her things together, she reached for the door handle.
“Daisy, wait.” Sousa called after her.
“Yeah?” she turned to smile at him.
“Uhh. your shoes untied” he smiled down at it.
“Oh! Thanks.” she laughed in embarrassment.
She swooped down to tie her shoe, and when she straightened up, he was standing closer then he was before.
Without a word, they leaned in to kiss.
Their lips met softly, and she hardened it by leaning in.
She got lost in his lips, his touch. She closed her eyes and forgot about the world, the dinner, mack and simm- shit. The dinner.
She reluctantly pulled away.
“That was nice,” she said, her eyes still closed, “but we need to go.”
“Right.”
They walked out of her room, hand in hand. Both with a giddy smile on their faces.
#agents of shield#daisy johnson#daniel sousa#daisysousa#dousy#agents of shield ending#chloe bennet#enver gjokaj#daisy johnson fic#dousy fic#agents of shield fic#gif by me
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"Feel better" gives off daisy and lincoln vibes
"A moment ago, it was the first time I said I love-"
Daisys heart had stopped, her lungs had frozen mid exhale, and she wasn't sure they had resumed their primary functions in the days and weeks that had followed those words. But they must have, because she was still roaming the Earth. Lincoln was still gone.
"Saving the girl I love and the world at the same time? Seems pretty right to me."
He loved her. Someone loved Daisy. She loved him, too. She never got to say it back.
Her entire life, nobody bad ever loved her like Lincoln had. Nobody had ever made her feel worthy of being loved. Daisy had finally earned someone's love, she earned his love.
A knock sounded at the door to her bunk, which she hadn't left in days. Simmoms had brought meals that were barely touched, and that had been the only human interaction Daisy had had in almost a month.
"Sk-- Daisy?"
It was Coulson.
"Can I come in?"
Daisy hadn't used her voice in days, she couldn't form an answer. Not that she knew what she wanted to say.
Coulson cautiously stepped into her bunk. He looked her over carefully, taking in her pale face, dark circles under sunken, bloodshot eyes, her hair that had gone unwashed for over a week, the same shirt hanging off her shoulders; a shirt that looked a size larger than it had a month prior.
Daisy didn't acknowledge his presence, just stared blankly ahead. She felt the bed sink under his weight.
"Daisy . . ." Coulson started slowly, as if he didn't know what to say. But Daisy knew better. She knew he wouldn't have come if he didn't have a speech planned out. "We're all worried about you." His voice was so soft, but somehow stern. "I . . . I know it's hard, I know it hurts, but you still need to take care of yourself." He place a gentle hand on her arm. "You'll feel better if you eat something."
Daisy moved, suddenly. She moved away from Coulson and looked at him with accusatory betrayal.
"Hurts?" Her voice cracked, volume barely above a whisper. "Of course it hurts," her voice grew louder and rougher. "Of course it fucking hurts!" She stood up on shaking legs--no, her legs weren't shaking, the room was. "I don't want to feel better, I don't want to get over him!" She clenched her fists as fresh tears welled in her eyes and she screamed at Coulson.
In an instant, she was breaking down in his arms again as they sank to the floor.
She was gone the next day.
She bought a van that reminded her of her life before S.H.I.E.L.D, before things went completely, horribly wrong. She remembered Charles -- Charlie -- who had shown her the image of the cross floating right before the flames.
Daisy remembered his daughter, barely in Kindergarten. Daisy knew what it was like to grow up without a father. She couldn't give Robin her dad back, but she could give her mother the means to give them both a good life.
She was branded as a thief, a terrorist who brought down bridges after robbing banks, a radical political figure that was trying to level the scales of society.
Daisy beat the shit out of a man who she saw assaulting a woman half his size, and that was when she became Quake.
No matter how many people loved or hated her, idolized or demonized her for her actions, no matter what she did, her thoughts always wandered back to dark blond hair. Bright blue eyes, electric blue, to be poetic, dry hands from washing them all the time.
A man with a kind smile and dangerous eyes, an intense calling to help people, an imence knowledge and willingness to learn and grow, a sister, a man who loved her.
Daisy still couldn't belive he loved her. She repeated his last words to her constantly.
"It was the first time I said I love-"
I love you.
He loved her.
Someone loved her.
Daisy didn't even know he had a sister until Coulson brought up notifying his family. She loved someone she barely knew.
She loved him, and she hated him.
She hated him for being so good. So heroic.
She hated that she didn't get a chance to meet his sister.
Daisy would give anything to see him again, to just sit with Lincoln for just a moment. To be with him.
She threw herself into dismantling the Watchdogs, hoping that preventing them from hurting anyone would help her; hoping that it would make her feel better.
But she didn't want to feel better.
#high class writing#high class answers#staticquake#daisy johnson#lincoln campbell#agents of shield#songfic#penelope scott
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Thank you so much to @herosofmarvelanddc @cloudypaws and @mtab2260 for the tag! This was so much fun to think about :)
(fair warning, I wrote too much for many of these...)
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
Just 2 :)
2. What's your total AO3 word count?
450,577 if I did my math right!
3. How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?
Officially? Just 1 - Agents of Shield (two, I guess, if you count MCU as separate, since I use characters from both...). Off the record, many more than that! I have lots of bits and bobs from other fandoms that I tinkered with when I was younger, still getting the hang of writing, not brave enough to post things, etc. etc. Some of those include X-Men, Harry Potter, Percy Jackson, the Fosters, Star Wars, the Hunger Games, the 39 Clues, and a few others I can’t remember. None of those will likely see the light of day, mostly because they’re unfinished, not very good, and just not reflective of who I am as a writer anymore, but they were fun to play around with at the time :)
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
I just have the two, but The Important Thing is to Try wins, hands down, with 1227. Shoulder to Shoulder has 95, though, which I’m also very proud of! Important Thing has a definite advantage, being as long as it is, so I don’t know if that’s really a fair comparison between them.
5. Do you respond to comments, why or why not?
Yes! Or at least, I always try to! I just can’t believe someone would be kind enough to take the time to tell me what they thought of my story, so I always want to take the time to thank them and return the favor :) Plus, as I’ve learned, it’s a fantastic way to get to know some really lovely people!
6. What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?
Well... I technically only have one story that has an ending, at least on Ao3, and it’s not an especially angsty one, since it ends in Phil and Melinda getting married :) I have some angsty chapter endings in Important Thing, if that counts? I’m not even sure if any of my unpublished fiddlings have angsty endings (most don’t have endings at all lol)... I don’t mind writing angst, but I don’t know if I’m capable of making something without a happy (or at least hopeful) ending.
7. Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you've ever written?
Not really, unless you count AoS/MCU crossovers (which I guess technically count, but also I would argue it’s not a true crossover since (and I will die on this hill) AoS is a part of MCU canon). When I was younger I was a fan of playing around with crossover AUs more so than the actual characters crossing paths (so like, what if these characters from XYZ were demigods or went to Hogwarts or what have you, and not so much what would happen if the X-Men met Luke, Leia, and Han on one of their space adventures). I started writing a crossover between AoS and the Marvel Rising cartoon once (which again, not sure if that’s a true crossover, since Daisy was in Marvel Rising, but I digress), where Coulson tasks Daisy to work with Kate Bishop and Rayshaun Lucas to collect and train a team of young Inhumans, starting with Kamala Khan, but I ran out of steam pretty quickly when it got too plot heavy.
8. Have you ever received hate on a fic?
I don’t think so. I’ve had some people not understand some choices that I made, but they asked it in a way that I thought was perfectly nice, and I was happy to talk about it with them. Sometimes people get “mad” at me when I cause pain and suffering, but I know that’s all in good fun :)
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
Nope, not for me. I don’t read it or write it, personally. Writing a kiss is hard enough!
10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not to my knowledge! Important Thing is probably too long and unwieldy to ever steal :P
11. Have you ever had a fic translated?
Someone once asked me on FFN if they could translate Important Thing to Russian, which was basically the coolest thing I’ve ever been asked!
12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
A fic, no. I’d love to try sometime! I had a friend in college who I co-wrote with A LOT, though, so I know I enjoy that process, given the right partner. We wrote several short plays together (ranging from ~15-50 minutes in length, including one that we wrote in a single afternoon!), selected scenes from a larger (unfinished) play inspired by historical letters we found in an archive that were sent between a man from Massachusetts serving in the American Civil War, his wife, and his 8-year-old son, and several scripts for TV sitcoms (2 pilots for 2 different shows, plus additional eps for those pilots, and a couple of later eps for a different show that a classmate of ours wrote the pilot for - we were trying to practice what it would be like to be on a staff with a showrunner haha). The sitcom scripts in particular I’m very proud of, and could talk somebody’s ear off about if asked (one’s about ghost hunters and one’s about a DnD party!), but maybe that’s better saved for another post ;)
13. What's your all-time favorite ship?
That’s a very hard question for me! Mostly because shipping stuff is usually one of the last things to register for me when I’m thinking about shows/books/movies I like haha... I’m always a sucker for Philinda, and younger me was rather taken with Percabeth, I suppose.
14. What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?
Hmm, several, really. The aforementioned AoS/Marvel Rising crossover I think could be really cool if I got it to work, but I don’t think that’ll ever happen. I also have a WIP that’s like an angstier version of a Hallmark Christmas movie AU where Daisy has to come home to her small town right before Christmas and figure out what she wants out of life, but I’m a little stalled out on that one, mostly because I’m waffling on who the charming love interest should be and because I don’t have enough of a plot, just lots of feelings about coming back home to a place you thought you had left behind lol.
I’d put Important Thing and it’s (as of yet) untitled sequel on here as things I want to finish, but I’m much more determined to see those through, so I don’t think they qualify for the “never will actually write” part of this question :)
15. What are your writing strengths?
I don’t know if other people agree with this, but I think I write pretty decent dialogue. My “training” (if you can call it that) is in, as you might have figured out by now, script and screenplay writing (those were the only creative writing classes I took in college). So having a sense of the rhythm a conversation needs to have and how to write dialogue that sounds mostly like how people really talk (but shined and tightened up enough so that it’s not actually like verbatim dialogue, which is far less interesting to read!) is something that I feel like comes pretty easily. I also think I do okay with similes and metaphors - my brain tends to work in that way. It’s easier for me to think of stuff (feelings, especially) in terms of comparing it to more familiar things than to just think of the thing directly, if that makes sense?
16. What are your writing weaknesses?
If I was being honest, this would be a very long section, but I know it’s not fun to read a big ol’ paragraph of someone self-criticizing, so I’ll keep it to one or two items ;) A big one for me is pacing, I think. I tend to write more than I need to and to over-explain things, so my chapters get very long and sometimes don’t really go anywhere? Until all of the sudden, they DO, because things need to HAPPEN! I’m a pretty rigorous self-editor, but I do have a really hard time cutting out sections (unless they’re really just not working), so even if it would help the pacing to leave out this conversation between character A and character B, I often can’t make myself cut it. I also think I struggle sometimes with balancing my ‘showing’ and my ‘telling,’ especially in the sense of me over-explaining certain things - like when it comes to feelings/facial expressions/etc, for example. I compensate for that in Important Thing by making it a part of a few people’s POV, but it’s not really a good habit to have in general. Also spelling! I’m really bad at spelling and run my stuff through robust spellchecks and text-to-speech before I post anything to make up for it :)
17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?
I do it with some regularity, although I always get nervous about doing it wrong! It’s hard to avoid in AoS, where characters are spies and should (in theory, at least) have a working knowledge of multiple languages (”We’re spies, I thought we all learned languages?!”). Even in an AU, where characters aren’t spies, I like to try and pay homage to that, plus pay homage to certain characters’ native languages or just general multilingualism. I’ve spent a fair amount of time around people who speak more than one language, so I feel like it’s a natural part of groups of people to have more than one language spoken. I have a pretty good handle on written Spanish, a patchy idea of French, plus I know some Russian phrases from my dad and some German words from my grandfather, but I do rely on internet translation a lot. I usually run stuff through google, then run it backwards to see just how far off the initial translation was, then consult some actual, like, language learning sites to see if there’s particular idioms or common phrases that use different words than what google will give me, then run those words through backwards in the place of the original words to see if I can massage the whole thing to sound reasonably competent. Languages like Russian or Mandarin (which have their own alphabets/characters) are the hardest, since I have to also try and do a transliteration. I always try to put an apology/disclaimer in the notes any time I write in a language that isn’t English, because I’m sure I make lots of mistakes.
Also, I tend not to italicize words that are in other languages, because it looks weird on the page to me to set the other language apart like that (and because I italicize mainly for internal thoughts or emphasis, and usually what’s being said in another language isn’t internal or being emphasized). I put a rough translation at the end so we don’t have to pause the story for a parenthetical translation, but because the translation’s not right there, I try to either put in enough context clues that a person can still understand what’s going on, or I make sure that what’s written in another language isn’t critical to the overall understanding of the scene.
18. What was the first fandom you wrote for?
Officially, it’s AoS, since that’s the only fandom I’ve published for. I think the first true fandom I wrote fic for was probably either Harry Potter (entirely populated with OCs lol, I just liked using the world/setting), Percy Jackson (a mix of OCs and canon characters), or X-Men (all canon characters). I was a bit of a latecomer to fanfiction, though, like, I wrote a ton as a kid, but mostly original stuff, because I didn’t know that fanfiction in its current form was even allowed until I was in high school lol.
Oh! I almost forgot one! I’m not sure if this really counts as a fandom, but it’s definitely the earliest version of fanfic I wrote haha... I was like 12 and I wrote more than one story of an OC joining Robin Hood’s band of Merry Men, and then also one of that same OC becoming a knight of the Round Table, so like... do what you will with that information haha.
19. What's you're favorite fic you've written?
I can’t choose between my two darlings :( I mean, okay, technically it’s probably Important Thing. That story’s my baby. It’s huge and I’ve been working on it for almost 2 years, and I’ve poured a lot of my heart and soul into it. I’ve fallen in love with the universe I built in it, so much so that I wrote an entire prequel and have very concrete plans for a lengthy sequel. But I can’t not crow about Shoulder to Shoulder (the aforementioned prequel!), too... I’m just really proud of that one - it has a lot of firsts for me. First completed story. First romance-focused story. First foray into expanding the Important Thing universe. But yes, if I have to choose, then Important Thing wins. That’s a story that I started writing exclusively for myself - to give myself characters I could relate to and to explore a style of AoS fic that I loved reading - and that’s a story I will always and forever be proud of.
I think most people have probably answered this tag game at this point, so I don’t want to accidentally retag anyone! If you haven’t yet, and would like to join in, please do! This is your invitation <3
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My Uncle Reacts to AoS Season 4
So, instead of getting chores done this morning, my uncle and I finished Season 4 of Agents of Shield. Here are his reactions! Enjoy! Fair warning, it is a long post because Steve had a lot of feelings.
4x01
Before the episode: I’m guessing Coulson was like “I got too close to the situation and could no longer be impartial.” And then he passed over the title of director to May or that general guy. Talbot! That’s his name.
He’s like ghost rider is all. Holy crap he is ghost rider! I didn’t realize he was marvel.
Why’d they have to break up the band?
I am concerned about the robots.
Well, ghost rider is badass.
4x02
“You’re an engineer Mack. And a small tank.” Bwhahahahahaha, that’s so true.
The director is Talbot. Ooooh, not Talbot. Someone new.
Oh, Daisy has a picture of Lincoln. I miss him.
May is not okay. May needs a nap.
I still can’t get over Mack offering that maybe they’re just ghosts. Fitzsimmons faces were amazing.
Mace is such a politician.
4x03
*Lincoln is mentioned* Owwwwwww
I love the Phil, Mack, and Fitz team up.
Wow, Fitz is badass this episode.
Okay, so Elena is amazing. That shot with the light was awesome!
4x04
Fitzsimmons moving in together, count me in.
I see where Daisy is coming from, but not awesome that she’s using her friends and then leaving.
Come on Daisy! Come home.
Heylo? Hahahahaha
Radcliffe, I don’t think telling the android it’s okay to lie sometimes is a good idea.
What’s that face she’s giving? Oh shit, is she feeling things? Is she feeling things for Fitz. That’s not good.
I don’t trust James. *moments later* Called it.
Yes, Mack, two fire dudes just fell into fireworks.
Jemma for sure knows she’s an android.
“I prefer a classical beauty myself.” Awww, Fitz.
4x05
Oh, Fitz, a high five will not fix her being mad at you. Trust me.
“I’m sure they have it under control.” *cuts to chaos* Okay, that’s the best transition of the whole show.
Robbie, please don’t go after that guy. Just keep going please. Dammit. Why can no one just follow instructions in Shield.
Way to go Jemma! But what happened with Mace?? What did he do?
May had a heart to heart with her and she’s still leaving? Is Daisy really going to leave after all of this? She can’t, right?
Robbies uncle is going to get sucked into that book. Yeah, look at his expression. That’s not good at all is it.
Well that senator sucks.
4x06
*Mace mad at Coulson* Daaaang
Fitz is so smart. He would be a millionaire if he was an inventor or something. But he just wants to help people.
Wait, shit, Eli is bad!
*Fitz, Coulson, and Robbie disappear* Oh no!!!! Wait, that’s how the episode ends! Noooo!!
4x07
Shit, where are they.
Oh, so that’s where they are. That’s not good.
“I have to phone Simmons to tell her... I’m in another dimension.” Bwhahahahaha oh no.
That’s not Mack. Holy shit!
“Oh Mack’s the ghost rider no big deal. But you can’t hear us.” Oh my god, these lines are amazing.
The dialogue this episode is fantastic.
No!!!!! Don’t give the darkhold to Radcliffe. He’s already so morally grey!!!
Fitz is going to hit Mace
Aww, Fitzsimmons
There’s some flirtation with Phil and Melinda going on.
Have we seen who’s in that photo Mack is looking at? Hope?
Oh hey Robbie, how was hell.
Ummm, is Aida building a brain? Is she corrupted. Yep. She’s corrupted. We’ve got a corrupted android. Great.
4x08
Coulson’s comedic timing is everything.
Oof, Robbie is not having a good time.
“Oh yeah, Fitz solved that” Of course he did. He’s Fitz.
*Badass Fitzsimmons duo scene* They truly are a dynamic duo aren’t they. That shot was awesome!
*Daisy looking at Robbie’s car* well, you’ve got a sweet car.
*Mackelena finally kiss* gasps. There it is!
*Aida kills Nathanson* Oh dears.
*Reveal that May is an LMD* Wait wait wait. Holy shit. Oh shit. Damn.
4x09
Aida’s so sweet to May. And she sweetly killed Nathanson like it was nothing. Not creepy at all.
Once again Mack’s lines are amazing.
Yeah, don’t attack the android guys. Not a good idea.
“Why would you want to hurt me Leopold.” Aaaah haaaa, umm. No.
“Well, Simmons has only been kidnapped twice on this planet.” Hahahahahahaha that’s hilarious.
Smart people are stupid. That’s amazing.
*Aida freezes may* AAAH, she doesn’t even know she’s a robot!
*Radcliffe reveal* O. M. G. He’s corrupted. He played them. Asshole. Dammit he read it for just a second! No!
This is a good part of the show! I’m really enjoying this.
4x10
What the heck’s in that brief case?
And Radcliffe is now super creepy.
Poor Fitz, he doesn’t know his friend totally betrayed him.
“I did this to protect you.” Awww, Fitz. I mean, let’s not make robots, but that’s still really sweet. He just wanted to protect Simmons and everyone.
*May wakes up* Jesus, god May. She’s a badass. Imagine waking up like that! God! That’s terrifying.
“I can’t help feeling like somethings off.” Yeah, May, you aren’t real.
Mace isn’t an inhuman! Oh damn.
*Fitz analyzing Aida’s head* Uh oh Fitz.
“Is it weird that I found that attractive?” Hahahahahahahaha. Fantastic.
*Coulson back in charge* hell yeah!
*May finds out she’s an LMD* Aaaaaaah! Well, that’s an existential crisis.
4x11
Does Radcliffe have more of them? Because he just happened to have May.
*May waking up over and over again* Feels like I’m watching The Good Place.
*Aida breaks a glass* That’s concerning that a robot would make a mistake like that.
*Hope reveal* Oh that’s awful! Poor Mack.
Whose the other LMD?
*Radcliffe LMD reveal* Ohhhh noooo. Poor Fitz.
4x12
Hey! I was wondering where the lanyard guys were!
“You’re going all Gollumy again” bwhahahahaha that’s amazing
“I’ve lost too much already, I’m not losing you.” Awww, Phil.
*Robo Radcliffe talks about Fitz’s past* Oh my gosh, that explains so much. Oh Fitz! Screw Fitz’s dad.
How many Koenigs are there?
Awww, baby Fitz!—Maggie
I bet that’s his real mom too!—Steve
Fitz and Simmons are cute!
*Philinda kiss* Noooo! She’s a robot!
“Sorry, you weren’t meant to last” Radcliffe you ass. You evil ass.
4x13
*Agnes reveal* Eeeek, creepy. That’s who she’s based on!
Wait, is she really Australian? Damn, she does a great American accent.
Mace really got the short end of the stick in a lot of this didn’t he.
*Shockley gets turned into an inhuman* Oooh shit.
Did they just put Shockley on the plane. The dude that blows up? Well, damn.
*Fitzsimmons realize Shockley is the bomb* Way to go dynamic duo. Now gooooo! Oh, they’re going. Simmons pushing Fitz is amazing.
Aaaaaah! Fitz! Fitz and Mace!
*Fitzsimmons hug* Awww. I know I’ve said it before but they’re cute.
Noooo! Mace! Shit they kidnapped Mace!
*Aida takes put on Agnes’s necklace* Ewwwww, creepy. Creepy creepy creepy! Aaah.
4x14
*The superior walking* He must have this ‘I’m so cool face’ on at all times.
Aww, is Radcliffe in there to be with Agnes. That’s so sad.
*Flashback with Phil and May* Aww, May is all playful. It’s before the sad times.
*Mace chained* that’s not great for your circulation.
They’re going to kill Mace. No, don’t kill Mace.
“Morales, you’re with me.” Uh oh, Morales. More redshirts with names making me nervous.
“You’ve enhanced yourself with alien technology.” Actually Fitz built his hand.
“Cool origin story, bro.” Okay, that’s incredible.
“Concern only slightly lessened.” Davis is just like ‘thanks dude.’ Fantastic.
Mack doesn’t need super powers to be a badass.
*LMD reveal* Holy shit. Holy shiiiit. They switched out all four of them??? All four??? Holy shiiiit. Fitzsimmons are all alone. Aaaahaaa.
“Even filth has a purpose.” Ewwww, and she’s leaning over him like that. So creeeeppyyy. Eewwww.
“He’s a shrink.” Oh awwww. It’s Andrew. She falls in love with him.
Well I guess Phil and Melinda’s robots can be together. Kind of weird but okay.
Oh my god, this is stressing me out!!!
‘Even filth has a purpose.” Gaaah, ewww. I’m still thinking about it.
So is Radcliffe even in control anymore? Or is he too preoccupied with the framework to care. Like, is Aida just doing whatever the heck she wants now because that’s unsettling.
4x15
Where are all of them? Oh they’re in the framework. Uh oh.
Ewwww, Aida is evil! He’s (Ivanov) alive and she’s cutting into him.
Aaah, they’ve got them surrounded. It’s so creepy.
This is some body snatchers shit.
*fitzsimmons LMD scene* *Steve biting his nails with wide eyes* oh my god that was awful.
*Steve rewinds to rewatch the LMD scene* they’re so good. And it hurt so much to see Fitz go so cold. Owwww. Because it was him and how he would act and then it just shuts off. Ugh, they’re so good.
*Jemma stabbing Fitz scene* Oh he’s thought about getting married. Oh my god, that’s so awful. So disturbing. That hurts. They’re so talented.
*Daisy LMDs* Ohhhh that’s so disturbing. This is all so disturbing. Oh my gosh.
*Daisy and Jemma scene* Awwww, they found the only other person to trust. That’s so sweet. Gosh, that was also a brilliantly acted scene.
They’re all such good actors. All of them.
God, this is all so disturbing.
*Aida kills Radcliffe* oh shit. Aaaaah. That’s so creepy.
“Because you and Fitz belong together.” Thats the truth.
“Their poor base” -Maggie
“And they just retiled the bathrooms.” -Steve
Ooh, quake jump, that’s so cool.
*Slow motion quake* That’s sooo badasssss!
*Davis flying the Zephyr* Aah, Davis. Careful. He just started training.
*LMD May blows up the base.* oooh ho. Damn.
“Lincoln?” Oh noooo. That’s awful.
*Ward reveal* Whaaaaat?
*Coulson reveal* Whaaaaaat?
*Mack reveal* oh nooo, he’s got his daughter.
*Fitz reveal* Whaaaaaat? But, damn.
*Jemma reveal* Whaaaaaaaaat? She’s in a grave? Who’s in the car with Fitz?
*May reveal* is she an avenger? *Hydra logo appears* Waaaaait. Whaaaaaaaaat?
What the hell is going on. What the hell? What is this place. Are they all evil? Some of them evil? Mack isn’t evil right?
*Ivanov’s head* Ewwww creepy.
Whaaaat the helllll. As Fitz would say *does Fitz impression* what the hell?
Dammit why do I have to put the kids to bed!! I want to watch the next episode!! Gosh dang it.
That’s disturbing count: around 15
4x16
“Skye?” Skye??? Skye!!!
*Logo* ooooh, agents of hydra
“You’re on another planet this morning.” Yeah, she is. No shit Ward.
*Daisy looks up Lincoln* Awwww. Owwwww.
*Jemma jumps from the grave.* Lucky she was in a shallow grave.
They’re having a bad week.
Vijay isn’t real. He’s at the bottom of the ocean.
*Ward punches Vijay* wait, did he want him to stop talking? Hmmm.
*Coulson class scene* Aaaahhaa that’s not awful at all.
*May Bahrain reveal* oh shit, it changed that much! Shit.
“We’ve got him doctor” Radcliffe? *Fitz reveal* Ooooh nooo! Noooo! Shit, noooo! Jemma died and he went all dark. Nooooo.
“It’s a magical place.” Oh damn!
“My father used to say...” Shit, does Fitz have his dad’s influence?????
*Ward double agent reveal* Ooooooh! Shiiit. That’s so interesting!!
“This isn’t the framework this is hell” Jemma’s so pissed.
“Drones, Dwarves. Whatever.” Awww, Jemma’s heart just broke right there.
Are they stuck in the framework! Well shit!
*Fitz and Aida kiss* Ewwww. I mean it makes sense in this world because of course she’s using Fitz but ewww.
She replaced Jemma with herself. That’s not creepy at all.
“Daisy?” Aaaah! He remembers!
This place is messed up! Interesting, but messed up!
4x17
“I make my own soap now.” Bwhahahahahaha. That’s amazing.
Aww, Mack has his daughter. And she’s adorable. Oh no!
Ophelia? Oooh, she’s got her own name.
“I’d cross the universe for you.” Ewwww! Noooo. He literally crossed the universe for Jemma.
*Fitz and Aida make out* *Maggie screams and Steve shivers* But why is Fitz so hot in the framework though—Maggie *Steve nods*
“The soap made me do it.” Bwhahahahaha
*Mace reveal* Aaaaah! Mace! He’s all gruff now and an inhuman! He got everything that he ever wanted.
“And we’ll make our society great again.” Ewwwwwwwhewe!
This is so interesting! I’m really liking it!
*Mack and hope get taken by Hydra* that’s so awful! That is so disturbing!
Coulson is so nerdy, I love it.
“You’re Daisy Johnson. We’re agents of shield.” Mack remembers.
*Revealed that Mack doesn’t remember* No! Shit.
*Fitz kills Agnes* *sharp intake of breath, Steve stays silent for a very long time.*
*Mack joins Shield* Good job Mack.
“How do you feel?”-Maggie.
Steve quietly: “sick.”
4x18
I love how Mace is all scruffy and his suits all scratched.
Aaah, evil Fitz makes me sad.
*Jemma seeing Mack and Hope* Yeah, it’s an oh shit moment.
“Tell your old man all about it.” *Steve gasps* Oh no.
“I don’t know the kind of man I’d be without you father.” “That’s why I’m here.” Yep, to brainwash him.
TRIP!
*Brainwash room* Oh no! It’s the other kid too! No!
MACE! Noooo! Why would Aida do that. She’s so evil.
That’s so messed up.
*May used Terrigen on Daisy* Yes. Good job May. And hopefully it’ll heal her in the process.
4x19
Ha, Bakshi has a tv show.
Aww, mace is dead. He was a good man.
*Daisy quakes Aida out a window* *Steve laughs* That took her by surprise didn’t it.
“It’s like sipping poison...” Mmm, Fox News.
“You’re the new head of hydra” Yikes.
*Ward throws remote* Umm, you guys have limited remotes!
*Steve pauses show* I don’t like any of this. It’s interesting but I hurt inside. It hurts that Fitz is evil. Mace is dead. Agnes is dead. Radcliffe is in prison. May was evil. I’m sad.
Aww, Coulson all of a sudden became that paternal leader.
Wait, so she totally used Fitz in like every way. What a jerk.
Trips the best.
Sorry Ward. She wants to feel bad for you but she can’t.
So much Scottishness this season. I love it.
*Radcliffe yells at Alistar* yep, because you’re a worthless asshole ya jerk. Oof, he just throat punched Radcliffe.
Aww, Coulson is coming into his own.
“When this is over-“ Do I get Skye! “Do I get my Skye back?” Called it!
I liked that scene with Grant. It was the redemption that the other Ward didn’t deserve but this one did. It was nice. Also really well acted.
“Hydra giving alternative facts.” Ooooh, they’re calling them out. They are so not fans of Trump and it’s amazing.
*Coulson on the news* This is Shield’s please vote! Please vote.
That was amazing.
4x20
Yeah, I hate all of this.
This all hurts.
*Fitz talks to Radcliffe* Come on Radcliffe, please don’t betray us. Please.
*Jemma kills Alistair* Well, that’s not going to help us.
“I’m sure everything is fine.” It is not. Simmons killed Fitz’s dad.
I hate this. It’s fascinating and I hate it. She’s just made him mad. God, no.
*Trip saying goodbye* Awww, this hurts. He’s goneeee in our world. Whyyyyy.
Is Aida trying to build her spine *body being built on the other side* Ohhh. Damn.
*Coulson gets shot* SHIT
*Coulson wakes up* You’re going to have to fight a killer robot, Phil.
*May wakes up* Awww she did it! She followed him!!
*Radcliffe redeems himself* Yes! Radcliffe! Yes! Thank you!
*Fitz falls through* Thank God!
Thank you Radcliffe.
*Mack not coming with* Maggie, I really don’t like this.
Oh gosh, Fitz is so freaked out. They’re all so freaked out. Aaah, Aida!
*Aida and Fitz teleport* Well that was unexpected.
I feel really ill. Like, this hurts a lot. I hurt a lot.
It’s like The Red Wedding but drawn out over 4 episodes and I hurt.
4x21
Before the episode: I came into the framework so optimistic and it crushed me. Like I thought May was an avenger and then it was like hahaha pain.
Oh yeah! And then she teleported with Fitz. JERK!
Fitz really got screwed by the framework didn’t he.
*Coulson kills Robo Ivanov with a shield* WOAHHH!!! That was amazing! ...and disturbing.
*Coulson recounts what happened with Robbie Reyes* BWHAHAHAHAHA. It sounds so ridiculous when you recount it but it’s so amazing watching it.
Will she stop teleporting Fitz! He already feels sick!
Yeaaaah, giving Fitz his abuser back and replacing the woman he loves with yourself is not what would make him happy Aida!
“If he wanted to kill us he could just flood the place. Why is he stalling.” TO FLOOD THE PLACE, PHIL!
“I drank the bottle of Haig” “you piece of—“ *Steve can’t stop laughing*
*Mack almost drowning* Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit. OH SHIT.
*Fitz and Aida rescuing mack* THANK GOD.
*Jemma shoots Aida* well, yeah.
*Jemma shoots Fitz* Love ya Fitz, sorry man.
“What do we do with Fitz?” Talk to him!!
“I’m just like Ward.” Oh ho, that hurts.
“There’s only room in my heart for her.” YES! Oh shit, Aida’s not happy.
OH SHIT!
NO DAVIS! DAVIS!
*Toddler starts crying IRL over a toy* Now imagine if we gave her powers.That’s what’s happening with Aida.
*Fitzsimmons pod scene* oww
*Yoyo plugs herself into the framwork* This is a mess.
*Aida throws bottle in anger* His vodka!
*Aida and Ivanov scene* Aaah! Inhuman robot sex. Oh. Nope. Murder.
*Robbie comes back* Welcome back buddy! SHIELD shit has hit the fan.
4x22
“How do we kill Aida?” Hell chains? I’m thinking hell chains.
*Robbie waiting for Shield* Hello, back from another dimension? No way, us too!
Well Radcliffe is screwed if the framework is falling apart.
“I’ll talk to him. He’ll remember me.” No he won’t Elena. Wish he would though.
*Robo!Daisy shoots Talbot* *Steve sits with his mouth open* NO!! I mean, he could be annoying but he was a good man! And he’s been around since season 1!
“There’s a pulse.” How? Yay! But how?
“Once you say you can’t stop me. Well—“ it’s like when you say you feel safe on Survivor and then get voted off the island.
*Daisy & Robbie team up* Boom bitches!! That was super cool!
Mack’s not going to leave until Hope de-materializes. And that sucks ass.
“Robot May was much more supportive.” HA! That’s amazing.
EVERYTHING’S A MESS AND EVERYONE IS HURT AND DIE AND PAIN AND OWW AND THINGS.
Maggie: “What?”
Steve: “You heard me.”
*Aida kills LMD!Jemma* WHAT! What the hell? I feel so sick. Oh thank god she’s an LMD! But I feel ill.
Eeeewwwww the kiss Aida gave Fitz on the cheek is so disturbing.
*Jemma shoots Aida* YES! AWESOME!
*Coulson ghost rider reveal* HOLY SHIT THAT’S AMAZING! I FEEL SO MUCH BETTER!
*Aida dies* Well that was awesome and terrible and poor everyone.
They really do a great job of making you feel sick don’t they.
*Mack and Hope scene*
Maggie: “you okay?”
Steve: *wipes away tear* no.
Wait, is there more to Coulson’s deal with the Ghost Rider?
“Gave me a glimpse of the life I could have here.” Oooh! Mack and Elena! She did almost die for him. They’re in love.
*Robbie having to leave* He and Daisy couldn’t like kiss before he left? No? Fine.
*Daisy speech to Fitz* someone hug him, please!
*Diner scene* Whaaaat?
We’re in space next season!!?? Whooo!!
They’re all so messed up after all of this. I feel messed up after all of this.
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Baby Bird
Summary: Something bad happens to Adela’s mom, and she goes to two former Directors for help.
Warnings: blood, kidnapping,
Chapter One:
Adela couldn’t be more thankful when her Psychology class was finished. As much as she loved the class, she had had a bad feeling about going that day, and it had yet to subside. The stress of making sure her grades were high enough to get into the police academy certainly wasn’t helping either. Her phone vibrated, and she pulled it out to see a text from her best friend, Kariesha.
‘Agriculture running late, wanna meet up after dinner and hang for a bit?’ it read. Adela smiled, and texted back that she’d see her then, and to text her when she was ready. She tried calling her mom Bobbi, and her step dad Hunter, both who didn’t pick up. She thought nothing of it, and continued on her journey home.
She noticed a black van pulling out of the apartment complex parking lot, and once again, thought nothing of it. She grabbed her things as soon as her car was parked and headed inside with the full intention of watching Friends until dinner time. Those plans were shattered, however, as soon as she saw the apartment.
It was covered in blood. There was blood on the floor, on the couch, on the walls, even on the ceiling. She dropped her things and called Kariesha.
“Hey, what’s up? I just got out of class,” She said, but before she could say anything else, Adela cut her off. “Somethings wrong.”
“What’s wrong?” Kariesha said.
“My mom and dad aren’t picking up their phones, and the apartment is covered in blood.” She rasped out, the fear and shock hitting her, causing her emotions to boil over. “I-I think something bad happened.”
She heard rustling of Kariesha’s car keys. “I’m on the way. Stay on the phone with me.”
Adela nodded as the tears began to pour down her face. “Ok-kay,”
“Did you check the security cameras?”
“N-no, but I will,” Adela said, and ran to her parents room, where the security camera monitor was. She logged in, and all her breath left her body when she watched the latest footage.
Her parents were sitting on the couch, watching TV, when some men in all black busted through the door, and held her parents at gun point. She watched as they immediately tried to take down who Adela could only assume to by Hydra. Adela watched as her mother glanced around the living room and kitchen for her batons, before realizing they were in her bedroom, and she had to fight without them.
“Adela? What’s happening?”
Adela put the phone on speaker. “T-they got attacked! I think it was Hydra but I dont know. They tried to fight them off but mom didn’t have her batons, so all she could do was hand to hand combat. Hunter tried too, but they got him.” Adela sobbed out. “They got mom too. They dragged them out of the apartment!”
She heard Kariesha stop the car, and get out before running. “Okay, I’m on my way. Stay where you are!” Kariesha said, and moments later, she bust through the bedroom door where Adela was, her eyes pinned to the monitor. She ran over and wrapped her arms around her. “We have to call the police.” To which, Adela immediately protested.
“No. We cant call the police,” She pulled out of Karieshas embrace, and wiped her tears. “Help me! Mom told me that if something like this ever happened, my S.H.I.E.L.D. file would tell her everything I needed to know. My health records, birth certificate, important contacts, all of them. We should contact Coulson.”
They started to move around the room, and look for the file. Kariesha started in the closet, while Adela pulled her mothers batons out from under the bed. ‘Might need those at some point,’ she thought to herself. She felt around under the mattress, and found a yellow folder with her name on it.
“I got it!” She told Kariesha, and they sat on the floor and opened it up.
Adela Morse
Mother: Barbara “Bobbi” Morse
Father: Clinton “Clint” Barton
Step Father: Lancelot “Lance” Hunter
Parents Maritial Status:
Bobbi Morse, Clint Barton: Divorced
Bobbi Morse, Lance Hunter: Married
Clint Barton, Laura Barton: Married
Siblings:
Cooper Barton
Lila Barton
Nathaniel Barton
Emergency Contacts:
Kariesha Blackwood - (456)-768-0912
Gemma Simmons - (909)-871-0235
Daisy Richarson - (912)-345-8720
Phil Coulson - (109)-231-3456
“You have siblings?” Kariesha said, pulling the file from Adela’s hands. “I had no idea.”
You shrugged your shoulders. “Me either. Who’s Clint Barton?” You asked looking down at your file. Kariesha’s head snapped up at you. “Dude, that’s Hawkeye.”
Your jaw dropped. “My dad is Hawkeye?!” You exclaimed. “YES OH MY GOD HOW DID YOU NOT KNOW THAT!” Kariesha screamed at her. “I DIDNT KNOW HIS ACTUAL NAME! I’M NOT OBSESSED WITH THE AVENGERS LIKE YOU ARE!”
“WHY ARE WE YELLING?”
“I DON’T KNOW!”
Adela smiled at Kariesha before looking at the file again. “I think Coulson is our best option.”
“Does he know Clint personally?” Kariesha asked.
Adela shook her head. “No, he was more involved with my mom’s old team. As far as I know Nick Fury was personally involved with the Avengers, but Phil knows Fury, so that’s my best bet at this point. He’s retired, so lets just hope his number is the same,” Adela explained, as she got up to grab her phone. “Hopefully he can help us.” She said, as she dialled his number.
“Hello?” Coulson answered, after 3 rings.
“Hi, Uncle Phil, it’s Adela.” She said. Kariesha looked at her best friend in amazement. Adela never really shared the details of her parents work, especially when they met. They were both in Grade One, and had gotten lockers next to eachother. Kariesha told her what her mom did for work, but when she asked Adela, all she could say was ‘I’m not supposed to say’. Her mom and stepdad left S.H.I.E.L.D. a few years later, but Adela still rarely opened up about her parents careers.
“Hi, honey, is everything okay? I haven’t heard from you for a while.” He said, and Adela smiled. Her parents had tried to stay involved in the teams lives for her sake, but things got in the way. However, whenever they did get to see eachother, it was like not a day had passed.
“N-no, everything’s not.” Adela said, her emotions bubbling over once more. “I came home today, and Mom and Hunter weren’t here. There’s blood everywhere, and when I-I checked the camera’s I saw them being dragged out of the apartment by Hydra.” She said, a stray tear falling down her cheek.
“Okay. What do you want to do?” He asked her, and Adela thought about it for a moment.
“C-Can you get me in contact with my father?” She asked timidly, unsure if her uncle would be able to help.
“Of course. Let me get a hold of Tony, okay? It should only take a few minutes, so I’ll call you back.” He said, and they said their goodbyes before hanging up.
“What do we do now?” Kariesha asked, once Adela’s phone was in her pocket. Adela’s eyes landed on the Canon camera in her parents closet. “Pictures. We should take pictures of the apartment as evidence. We should also download the footage off the computer, it might help us find them.” Kariesha nodded, and immediately moved to the computer, while Adela busied herself with taking evidence photos. ‘It’s a good thing that we’ve already covered this in class.’ Adela thought. She and Kariesha worked diligently for a few more minutes, when her phone rang again.
“Hey kiddo, I got a hold of Tony. He said that he’s more than willing to help, and was wondering if you could meet with him today at the compound?” Adela felt her heart fill with hope.
“Yes, of course. I-Is my father going to be there?” She asked, her heart beating in her chest.
“As far as I know, he lives on a farm with his wife and other children, but there is a possibility he could be there. Do you want Tony to make sure he’s not?” Phil asked.
Adela shook her head even though he couldnt see her. “No, it’s okay. I was just wondering is all.”
Coulson gave her the address and other information they would need, and Adela was off, with Kariesha in her passenger seat.
“I can’t believe we’re going to meet Iron Man!” Kariesha said, practically vibrating in the seat next to her. Adela chuckled. “That’s not why we’re here, though. We’re here to find my parents, and maybe meet my father in the process.” The second part of that statement gave her huge butterflies in her stomach to think about. She knows for sure he doesn’t know she exists, and that terrifies her. What if he denies helping her because he doesn’t believe that she is his? What if he doesn’t want to have a relationship because of what happened between him and her mother?
These thoughts continued to swirl in Adela’s head, and before she knew it, she had arrived at the Avengers compound, where Tony was waiting outside for her. She put her car in park, and took a deep breath before climbing out. She waited for Kariesha to walk around the car with the camera and flash drive in hand, her S.H.I.E.L.D. file in Adela’s own. They made their way over to Tony.
“Hello, Adela, right?” Tony asked, sticking his hand out to her. Adela accepted it, and nodded.
“Yes. Thank you for meeting with me. I’m sorry about the short notice, but I didn’t know who else to turn to,” She said, as Tony greeted Kariesha and the trio walked inside. Tony gave them a quick tour, before heading towards the conference rooms.
Once they were all seated in the conference room, Tony looked over the evidence they had brought him, as well as watched the footage.
“Wow. Okay.” He said, once he had finished. “So, from my observations, it was definitely Hydra. I’m assuming you had the same observations?” He asked, and Adela nodded. “Okay.”
Tony pondered the next steps before speaking. “So, Coulson said that you were hoping to get into contact with Clint, and I think that’s a great idea. I’m also going to involve Natasha, because she was also a spy. Bucky and Sam are away on a mission at the moment, Thor is somewhere in space with the Guardians, and Rhodes is god knows where right now. I’d involve Wanda, but she seems to have her handful with whatever the fuck is happening in Westview. So I think Clint and Natasha are our best bet at the moment.” Tony finished.
Adela nodded before Tony continued.
“When I read over your file, I noticed that your mom had two different serums, a super soldier serum and the Infinity serum, so my guess is that you have those as well. We’ll have Bruce run some tests on you a little later. Do you have any one else you can stay with?” Tony asked, and Adela shook her head. She’d stay with Kariesha, but her mom didn’t have the room.
“Okay, perfect. We have an extra room here for you. Are you able to stay for emotional support?” Tony asked, turning to Kariesha, who shook her head. “Definitely not, sorry. Mom would have my head.” She said.
Tony nodded in amusement. “Okay. We’ll start small. How about you two move your stuff in here, and I’ll contact Clint?” The two girls agreed, and were on their way back to the apartment within 20 minutes.
Her phone vibrated from the centre console, and Kariesha checked it.
“Tony said he got a hold Clint, and Clint will be there soon. He doesn’t know what’s going on though.” Adela nodded in aknowledgement.
Now she was nervous.
#sebastian stan#mcu bucky barnes#bucky barnes#bucky barns fanfiction#mcu sam wilson#mcu natasha romanoff#mcu tony stark#mcu bobbi morse#mcu lance hunter#marvel#mcu thor#mcu clint barton#mcu loki#fluff#mcu#mcu phil coulson#mcu peter parker#angst
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Agents of Shield Rewatch 7x06 Adapt or Die
Aka story time with Danny Boy
Before that though, Sibyl is going to travel the virtual time highway or whatever
She’s like a poetess what a queen
That’s a lot of Chronicoms
Elena was trying to ease them into what happened and Deke is like lol I killed him
HENRY WHAT GIVES YOU THE RIGHT TO LOOK SO GOOD
Legit this outfit is doing things for me
Awww Mack has sweet memories
Also why have you not introduced Elena to your parents??
That shot of Stoner walking in front of his hologram is hilarious
This doesn’t look good for Z1 though womp
Yep this got long again hahahahaha
Daisy would want to hear a story about someone else being doped up ahahaha
Nathaniel is psyyyycho
As soon as she hears Whitehall is involved Daisy knows this is bad
May’s new abilities come in very handy
Poor Jemma is in a crisis here :(
Omg Mack hugging his mom hahaha that’s the sweetest
“This is Agent Rodriguez...she’s my girlfriend” MACK I LOVE YOU
Elena very smoothly swoops in there too
Mack’s Mom’s outfit is peak 70s and I love her
May and Phil are a mess but I love that they are actually talking
I love how Phil keeps breaking his handcuffs hahaha
That’s the best running gag this season
Mack’s and his dad working together is adorable
Well it would be if his dad wasn’t a robot
Ughhhhhhhhh I hate Nathaniel
Poor Daisy :(
And of course her first thought is of Jiaying
Sousa went quickly to calling her Daisy I’m just saying
Everything Sousa does here is the definition of *soft* like
The way he feels for her pulse then pats her shoulder once he feels it
The way he cradles her head on his leg
Then he just strokes her hair
And pleads with her to stay awake
And then he cups her head with his hands
I find it interesting that in his moment of panic worrying about her he calls her Daisy, but once he’s settled and has telling his story he’s back to Agent Johnson
But also when did he find out her first name?
Anyway I could watch this scene like 10000 times because it’s amazing and everything I wanted
Also Daisy is so brave and beautiful and smart to be able to think of stashing that glass in her palm while being tortured
I love her
I love Sousa
I love them together bless
And like, watching Sousa tap into his own trauma to help someone else is so very Sousa of him, you know?
He doesn’t exactly look like he enjoys telling that story. I mean he keeps looking at his leg when he mentions it being a pulpy mess, and he stares into space a lot when he’s not focused on Daisy. So I don’t think that was an easy task for him. And yet he did it. For her. To try and keep her focused and there.
Also that look on his face when he says there’s plenty of fight in her like
He’s completely a goner then
I could dissect this scene all day thanks for asking
In fairness to Deke he has every reason to be concerned about what he’s seeing here with Enoch and Jemma
But also why was she asleep there when she said she needed to be awake during the time loops??
Look at Phil using this device that May uses later to save the world it’s all connected
Look, maybe I’m just ship everything, but there’s a lot of sexual tension between Sibyl and Coulson
Well, as much sexual tension as robots can have
Finally some answers
Ish
“I named her Diana. She’s adorable and we’re inseparable. Literally.” HAHAHA
Omg Jemma be nice to your grandson
“Is that you?” Sousa is helplessly polite I love him
Nathaniel is getting what he deserves
“That’s my girl” I CRY
GET A ROOM YOU TWO
I mean a real room not this projected space
An epic Coulson speech yay!
“Dying...it’s kind of my super power” Oh honey no
But I love you
And I guess he talked about this with May...that’s so much trust in her
I LOVE THEM
Stoner and May would have been cute together ngl
“He’ll come back...always does” MELINDA MAY IS TRYING TO MAKE ME CRY
“And...you are a valued member of our family” I LOVE THAT SO MUCH
Deke actually does a good job with this secret good for him
Elena bonding with Mack’s mom /cry
Oh noooooooooooo
This is the worst
I hate everything
FREAKING ROBOTS
Seriously I was so mad at this show for a hot second because why??? Why do this to Mack?????
Henry absolutely kills this scene though
And Elena sitting with him...so sweet
Also I know I posted this before, but Deke does a very interesting thing with his eyes here. He comes in, tells them they’re about to jump, then his eyes flick over to Daisy and then to Sousa. I highly suspect that even Deke realized at that point that there was something there.
“I’m where I need to be” MY HEART CAN’T TAKE IT I LOVE IT SO MUCH
But also, sir, you can barely look at anything except Daisy obviously everyone on this plane is going to know what’s up if they don’t already
And then Jemma’s little smile when she walks off...you know she was trying to think of a way to take a stealth pic for Daisy’s scrapbook
Jemma is a scrapbooking queen I accept no criticism
:( Poor Mack
I love that Deke wants to help Mack
But also oops ya stuck now
Whew this episode had a lot. I mean it managed to score a 10000/10 on the BREAKING MY HEART scale but also a 100000/10 on the MY HEART IS SO HAPPY SCALE. I went through some things y’all. Also clearly we’re like 1000/10 on the Dousy scale. Meanwhile Elena gets a 5000/10 on the Supportive Girlfriend scale because really? She was the best.
We’re going to pretend the heartbreaking stuff didn’t happen and just go with a happy song. So from 1976, here’s “You Are the Woman” by Firefall because Daniel Sousa is gooooooone.
youtube
#aos#aosrewatch#aosrewatchs7#dousy#daniel sousa#daisy johnson#mackelena#alphonso mackenzie#elena rodriguez#phil coulson#melinda may#jemma simmons#enoch#deke shaw#fitzsimmons family#sibyl#nathaniel malick#and his henchmen#diana the brain implant#mack's parents#a lot of robots#and of course#my heart exploding
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Christmas at River’s End Mall
Summary - A Christmas AU in which everyone navigates their seasonal jobs, relationships and Christmas spirit, or lack there of, through woven together tales inspired by holiday prompts.
So excited about this little challenge for myself. 25 Days of Christmas, 25 Holiday prompts and a dozen or more characters I love and miss. Each chapter should spot light a different character or relationship and the stories become more and more intertwined (think Valentine's Day).
Chapter 1 - Decorating for Christmas
Prompt - Decorating for Christmas Relationship - Philindaisy Family Feels POV - Coulson
There was something magical about the River’s End Mall at Christmas time. The largest mall in the state and ideally suited for events all year round but an absolute must see come the holiday season. A massive tree, an indoor ice rink, sleighrides outside, lights, decorations and of course Santa himself.
All of this was made possible by the efforts of the mall’s event coordinator, Melinda May, who upon meeting, wouldn’t be pegged as the festive type. It would however be assumed that she was the type to be exceptionally good at her job. Whatever that job may be. She was an excellent event coordinator because she got things done. So, when it comes to Christmas, she hires the best.
A man who brings a winter wonderland to life within the walls of the mall.
A man who believes in putting the spirit back in the holidays, even in the most commercial of locations.
A man who loves a good suit, red or otherwise.
A man by the name of Phil Coulson.
And on occasion, Santa Clause.
“If you don’t lay off the cookies, you’re not going to need the pillow to stuff your suit this year.” Phil smiles as Melinda appears next to him. He’s got a mouth full of crumbs and can’t get his own quip out before she’s taken in the hundreds of decorations they’ve brought in. “You’re out doing yourself this year.”
He swallows down the last of the cookie and grabs a few more off the tray that was set out for the workers and volunteers. “We got so much publicity last year, national news remember, can’t disappoint now.”
“I see and when does the tree arrive?”
“It’s here, they’re trying to figure out how to get it through the door.”
Her eyes snap to his, “Coulson, we’ve driven trucks into the mall, exactly how big is this tree?”
“Could be worse, Rockefeller Center already had dibs on my first pick.”
May rolls her eyes at him but he knows it’s all for show. When May first came to him twenty-five years ago, inquiring about setting up a Santa Experience at the mall he knew she’d accept nothing less than the best and every year it got a little bigger and a little better. It had been great publicity for his business, but he would be lying if he said he wasn’t trying to impress her just a little bit.
“When do my elves arrive?” His own crew of employees handled most of the setup, installing the ice rink, hanging decorations from the balcony, setting up the tree, but over time the mall had acquired a group of volunteers who came in to help hang ornaments and set up activity tables.
“Daisy and the other volunteers should be here shortly.” Phil nods and watches as May moves around the towers of boxes, inspecting the contents of each of them.
“We’ve got everything, enough ornaments to coat a forest, the undecorated ones for the activity tables arrived yesterday, we’re also on 100% low energy LED lights this year.” May nods along but clearly isn’t paying much attention.
“We’ve got an excellent wrapping paper source this year too, lots of variety, different colors.”
“Mmhmm.”
“Came up with a tag line for the print advertisements, Christmas at River’s End Mall, it’s a Magical Place.”
“Coulson.”
“I think the box you’re looking for is over here.” Finally with her attention back, he leads her over to a foldout table with a small box sitting at the edge. May peers inside to see it full of handmade ornaments and a small spark appears in her eyes. Shortly after they had started the Santa Experience at the mall May had partnered with the local orphanage to bring in the kids in to do crafts and receive gifts. It was that first year that they had met Daisy, an unlucky but optimistic little girl and accidently bonded with May. While most of the kids took their crafts home to decorate as best they could for Christmas, Daisy always gave hers to the grumpy coordinator. May would then hang the decorations on the large tree. He still remembers the look on Daisy’s face when she came back the second year and saw her messy glitter ornament front and center. Phil had watched the pair get closer every year from then on and to be honest he knows he’s gotten attached too.
“I know you’re not Santa you know.” She says, her tiny arms crossed and messy dark hair obscuring her face.
“Oh.” He doesn’t know if that means she doesn’t believe in Santa at all or just knows that he’s not the real thing.
She leans against the arm of his chair. “Yeah, but I won’t tell the other kids.”
“Well I appreciate that; do you still want to tell me what you want for Christmas?” He always played Santa with the kids from the orphanage. He handled it better than his other employees when all these kids ever asked for was a family.
“I don’t really want anything.” She’s admiring the tree they’re situated in front of, he can see the lights sparkling in her wide eyes.
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah, but can I hang out for a minute anyways?” She asks, still distracted.
He smiles. “Of course.”
Every year it was the same with Daisy. She wouldn’t ask for anything, just go through the line for show and sit with him and stare at the lights when it was her turn. He found himself looking forward to the few minutes they shared together but then one year she wasn’t there. He had gone to May immediately. His friend, he had thought had been in a bad mood since the start of the holiday season, but that day she seemed particularly distant. “No Daisy this year, was she adopted?” He asks. Several little kids look up at him with curious eyes.
After ensuring all the activity tables were covered, May gestures for him to follow her a few steps away. “They’ve placed her with a foster family.”
“Well that’s good, a step in the right direction.” May says nothing. “But you don’t sound convinced.” He jokes.
“Its happened a couple of times before, they always send her back.”
This shocks him. Daisy was such an easy kid. Didn’t ask for anything, helped with the younger children, “she seems like such a good kid.”
“She is, just not a good fit, that’s what Sister Anne said.”
“Maybe this time will be different.”
“Maybe.”
Coulson knows somethings up. He’s gotten pretty good a reading May over the years. “You don’t seem too thrilled about that possibility.”
“That little girl deserves some love and support in her life, if she’s with a family that will give her that then I’m ecstatic.”
Daisy was back the next year. Things hadn’t worked out well with her foster family and she had been sent back to the orphanage shortly after the new year. On the plus side May seemed merrier than she had the past year, even if it was just slightly.
When Daisy comes through the line this time she doesn’t sit on the arm of the chair and stare at the lights and she doesn’t mock him about his crush on May. Daisy was a very perceptive child. Instead she shifts uncomfortably and whispers, “I think I know what I want this year.”
“Really?” Phil perks up. Whatever this kid wants he’s prepared to make it happen for her. He’ll talk to May and they’ll make it happen. A pony, a car, whatever.
“Yeah, but I don’t think I’ll get it.”
“Oh no? Well I know you know I’m not really Santa, but I could still work a little magic.”
Daisy still doesn’t give it up but her eyes that normally stare at the sparkling lights are directed now at the activity table where May is helping some of the younger kids glue cotton balls to Santa hats.
“She’s teaching me to ice skate.”
“Yeah?” This surprises him if only just a little. He had found out not long after they first installed the indoor ice rink that she was an excellent skater but he’d yet to see her set foot on the ice.
“She’d be a good mom, I think.”
So that was it. “That is a pretty big request.”
“I didn’t say – “ She protests.
“I know, but also, I know.” Daisy gives him a small smile before it fell back to a frown. “Look,” he said softly, taking her hands, “I don’t know if I can make that happen but I do know that she cares a lot about you and so do I, it makes me really happy that you shared that with me.”
“Thank you Coul – um, Santa.”
“COULSON!” Phil is jarred from his thoughts in time to see Daisy spiriting up to him. She’s grown now into a young woman, with a passion for computer science and a close batch of misfit friends who she’s built a family out of. Its no longer just her and May and occasionally himself at the Christmas dinner table.
“Long time no see, how come you never visit anymore?” He pulls her in to a tight hug. Its been too long.
“I don’t know, maybe because I’m a busy working adult now.”
“All lies, you’re ten years old in my mind.” He steps back, “you’ve got time to help me decorate though?”
She beams back at him. “Always, but uh, where is the tree?”
Yeah he should probably check on that. He turns to May, who at some point during his reminiscing had answered her phone. “They just got it through the doors, Coulson I swear if this doesn’t fit – “
“I will personally go chop down a smaller one,” he promises. “You try to give her the best and she complains about it.”
“I’m not complaining I’m being rational; someone is going to have to take care of this tree.”
“I have been doing this for twenty-five years and never once had a tree die on me.”
“1999, 2007, 2013, last year – “
“Last years was sick, what did you want me to do put it out of the street, have you never seen a Charlie Brown Christmas.”
“Alright mom and dad," Daisy interrupts, "let’s just call this one a draw, its sounds like we’ve got a lot of work to do.” She looks eagerly at May and he knows she wants something. “And speaking of work, I brought my roommate, Jemma, you remember her, right?”
“She's the expert gift wrapper you mentioned?”
“Can she interview with you?”
“These aren’t really convenient hours, she knows that right?”
Daisy nods enthusiastically. “She does, absolutely does, her labs have her working weird hours, late nights and early mornings, so this should be perfect for her.”
May nods in agreement. “Sounds great, let’s go.” Daisy does a short victory jig and begins to lead the way. May starts to follow but stops suddenly. “Coulson - "
“Yes?”
“The Tree.”
“I’ll ready the ax, Melinda.” She smiles a genuine smile and his heart thuds like he’d a kid again. Maybe this would be the year. Maybe.
#aos fic#aos#philindaisy#melinda may#phil coulson#daisy johnson#25 days of christmas#my fic#christmas at the mall
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Fandom: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Pairings: Daisy Johnson / Daniel Sousa
The team meets on the Zephyr for the last time before going their separate ways. Daisy reflects on the past seven years with them while trying to come to terms with losing the only home she's ever known. In the meantime, she is trying to find a way to tell Daniel about their time loop kiss, which is not such an easy task with the lack of privacy on the spaceship. Daisy also has an awful nightmare and Daniel is there to pick her back up.
Sequel to ‘About Starfish and Squares’ but can be read as a stand-alone.
Also posted on AO3.
Hey guys!
I am soooo happy you liked my previous fanfic and since you wanted more, and I had a lot of ideas, here is Part Two. I wanted to write something short, basically, just Daisy telling Daniel about their time loop conversation and the kiss. And once again it turned out as this massive thing, even longer than Part One. I had a lot on my mind since I started rewatching the whole series again before the finale which I am equally excited and scared to watch. However it ends (and I really hope Dousy gets a happy ending) I will cry like a baby. Anyhow, thanks for the lovely comments on About Starfish and Squares on AO3, your support really helped me with finishing Part Two. I hope you will like it as well. Sorry for any mistakes. OK, so enough of my rambling. Enjoy the reading!
FYI I used a small part of the song Freaking me out by Ava Max in one section. It just felt right considering Daisy's feelings. (And I keep singing the song over and over so...)
Disclaimer: All characters are a property of Marvel and Marvel television.
Home.
What is it? What does it feel like? Is it a place or people? Daisy used to ask these questions for years. She wasn’t the only one, though. All the other children at St. Agnes orphanage were plagued by the same thoughts, the same questions. The same hopes. Every one of them hoped that one day someone would come and give them what they want. A home. It didn’t matter they didn’t know what it meant, they all wanted it. Daisy craved it. Some children believed that it wouldn’t be strangers coming through those doors but their own parents. They would open the doors, nervously step through, and explain everything. Apologize. There would be tears, there would be hugs, and hearts mended. They would take them home and forget about the past. Even Daisy imagined it, oh, so many times. She used to just sit there and hypnotize the old creaking wooden doors in the common room while other kids played. She did it so often that she remembered every crack, every deformity that could be found on them. Sometimes those doors opened and her heart leaped to her throat in expectation. Strangers came in and took her to their home but it was always over sooner than she could think of it as her home. She was back at St. Agnes and the doors were closed again. Only one time she really thought ‘this could be my home’. She had hope but even that was crushed when the family sent her back within a month. St. Agnes was her only constant. Or was she a constant at St. Agnes? Children would come and go, they would be fostered or adopted. Daisy was one of the few that would always stay. Until she had enough of it, of course.
She dropped from high school and left. No more Mary Sue Poots. How could they name her that anyway? Meet Skye, a fierce hacker. No, a hacktivist. Once again, she thought she found if not a home then at least a place she belonged to. With Miles and the Rising Tide. But now she knows that she hasn’t found a home until that day when two agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., an organization she despised for years, came knocking on the door of her van. She didn’t know home until she met Phil Coulson and his team.
She kept her eyes trained on the person in question as he was busy talking with Fitz and Mack. Well, not him, really, just an LMD version of him. She couldn’t wrap her head around it. It was him and it wasn’t him. He died. She mourned him. He was like a father to her, more of a father than her own father. No, Coulson was her dad. Or is. Or whatever. She kept coming back to their conversations during the time loops. Daisy was afraid Coulson was going to do something unexpected, like turn himself off permanently, after their mission was over. She just got him back - in a way - she couldn’t lose him again. But he didn’t and he doesn’t belong in this world anymore. Just like her, Daniel, and Deke.
Well, it’s really hard to think about Deke as someone who doesn’t belong here. He is like a tardigrade, he can survive anywhere and anytime, obviously. She is reminded of his ‘80s band, the Deke squad, again. She shakes her head, smiling. He was thriving in the ‘80s just as he was in 2019. She has no doubt he will be more than okay even now. That also has her thinking about what he’s going to “borrow” this time. First it was tech and then songs. Maybe now he will finally come up with something original. Daisy moves her eyes to him. He’s sitting next to Simmons and Diana, excitedly speaking of something, nursing a beer in a glass from Deke Squad’s official merch that he somehow managed to sneak on the Zephyr before they left the ‘80s. There were at least dozen of boxes of t-shirts, glasses, headbands, keychains, and who knows what else. Daisy has found out about it only two days ago, when Deke decided to move the boxes and managed to break the main controls panel on the bridge with one from the heavier ones.
“What the hell, Deke?” She yelled, after she reached the bridge and assessed the damage.
“It broke,” he told her innocently.
“Are you kidding me? It broke? On its own, huh? You had nothing to do with it at all, right?” Daisy stood there in the middle of the bridge, hands on her hips, scolding him like a child. She sighed. “Fix it. Before Mack comes back and sees it.”
“On it!” He called and tried to hurriedly leave the bridge but tripped over one of the boxes that were lying all around.
“Why are all these boxes up here?” Daisy came towards one of them and was about to peek inside only to be abruptly stopped by Deke. “What’s in there?”
“Nothing! Just some personal belongings,” he said maybe a little too fast.
“Oh, really?” She asked him incredulously. Daisy pushed him away and opened the box. She furrowed her brows in confusion as she saw its contents. Glasses. She moved to the next box. She took out a t-shirt. “Why do you need all of this stuff, Deke?”
“It’s Deke Squad merch! I couldn’t leave it just lying there on the base!” He defended.
Daisy looked at Daniel, who was watching their interaction with an amused expression, rolled her eyes, and then shoved the t-shirt into Deke’s hands, letting out an annoyed sigh. “Get it out of here.”
He nodded and started to move the boxes around.
“I’m going to help him,” Daniel informed her with a look that said ‘just to be sure he doesn’t break anything else’ while stepping carefully around the closest box.
“Alright,” she gave him a grateful smile. “I’m going to wake up Coulson and order some pizza.”
“Pizza for breakfast? Really?” He eyed her doubtfully. “I think I can do better than that.”
“It’s lunch already,” Deke spoke up from behind a stack of boxes.
“Why not have a pizza for breakfast?” Daisy asked with a shrug, completely ignoring Deke’s remark. “Pizza is always a great idea. Plus, you have work to do here. You can’t make us a proper breakfast.”
“It won’t take forever to put these away,” Daniel assured her while stepping closer. “I’ll be in the dining area in a few minutes and trust me I’m going to make you a breakfast sooner than they would deliver pizza.”
“Wait, did you guys just wake up or something?” Deke commented still hidden behind the boxes. But for her, it was like background noise.
Daniel was now standing in front of her fixing her in place with his eyes and giving her a small smile. She felt him take her hand in his. He brought it up to his lips and softly kissed her knuckles. Daisy could feel the so long forgotten feeling of butterflies in her stomach and tried to fight the blush creeping to her cheeks.
“Okay,” she mumbled quietly.
“I’d rather have pizza,” Deke said as he emerged from behind the fortress of boxes he just put up. Daisy quickly took her hand from Daniel’s and both of them made a step back from each other. Deke eyed them suspiciously.
“Yeah, uh, I’m going to wake Coulson up,” Daisy threw over her shoulder as she hurried away from the bridge leaving the two men behind.
Daisy thinks of that pile of lemons Deke once placed in her bunk. They really had a weird way to express affection in the postapocalyptic future he’s from, that’s for sure. Somehow that feels like a long time ago. The talk they had when she tried to explain she’s not ready to let anyone in. Not then, maybe not ever. Not after Lincoln. The pain, the guilt, and the regret she felt for so long keeping her heart locked away. Hidden and safe. The ghost of her love for him lingering deep within it. Love that remained unspoken since she never got the chance to tell him ‘I love you’. She remembers how Deke’s hope was crushed by her words. The kicked puppy expression he had on his face. Daisy didn’t want to hurt him but she didn’t want him harboring hope for something that might never be. She wonders if he still has that crush on her. ‘Most likely not,’ she told herself, a smile tugging at her lips. He moved on and somehow, she did too. What looked like an impossible thing less than two years ago, now became a reality. She has no idea how or when things changed. Maybe it was around the time she and Simmons were high on those puffies on Kitson. Maybe she needed that to happen to realize what she really wanted. To be honest with herself. She told Jemma she wants her own Fitz and the realization of what she said stayed with her even days after that, never actually leaving the back of her mind. But the planet needed to be saved again so she pushed it away and forgot about it. That memory floated back up just a few days ago. The memory of her and Jemma under that gaming table in the casino.
Daisy’s eyes flicked towards Daniel and remained on him, studying him. He and Mack took shifts at preparing the food on the grill. Now it was his turn. Meanwhile, he listened to the conversation between Mack, Fitz and Coulson and often joined in. And of course, he never forgot to send her a look or a smile, to make sure she’s okay. He was just laughing at something Fitz said, judging from Fitz’s awestruck expression they were probably grilling Daniel about his past and SSR. Daisy grinned. Fitz is going to talk his ear off. She looked at the bottle of beer she was nursing in her hands and tried to collect her thoughts. While the memory from Kitson resurfaced only a while ago, her confused feelings caught her attention during the time loops. More precisely, she realized that there is something there, that wasn’t before. There’s a heart now, where there used to be a ghost. She kissed him and remained silent about it. It freaked her out, that’s why she kept it quiet until the mission was over. She often acts on impulse and then freaks out.
Daisy let out a long breath and looked at Daniel again. She still hasn’t talked to him about their kiss in the time loops, not for the lack of trying but for the lack of privacy, among other things. The last few days were crazy.
When Daisy walked into the dining area Daniel has already started making breakfast. She’s probably spent more time talking with Coulson in the LMD lab than she thought.
“That smells amazing,” she called from the doorway.
“Told you it’s going to be good,” Daniel said over his shoulder.
She can’t exactly tell when he decided to be her personal chef but it might have started after he caught her eating breakfast for dinner one evening in the ‘80s. Who says she can’t have cereals with milk whenever she wants to?
Daisy walked closer and hopped on the counter next to him. “Hmm, pancakes are the best,” she agreed while jabbing her finger in the pancake batter and tasting it.
“Oh, no. No eating the batter, young lady,” Daniel scolded her with a teasing grin while he took the bowl away from her.
“Hey, don’t be such a grandpa about it,” she said, pretending to be offended. “What’s that?” She pointed towards a bubbling dark purple mass in another pot.
“That’s a sauce made from forest fruit mix I found in the freezer with a few secret ingredients I won’t disclose,” he winked at her.
“Someone’s being secretive,” she teased. “It looks delicious.” Daisy leaned over the pot and took a deep breath. “I can smell some cinnamon, hmm…maybe few drops of vanilla extract…a drop of love…” She paused, opening one eye, spying on Daniel’s reaction. He was giving her an amused look.
“Now, why would I use a love potion?” He teased back with a smirk.
Daisy regained her sitting position and dramatically sighed while pretending to be occupied by looking at her nails. “Yeah, you are right. You don’t need one.” It took her a moment to realize what she has just said. Better yet, what underlying meaning those words held. Her breath caught in her throat and she carefully looked up at him. Daniel had that soft look on his face again. That look she always wants to kiss away. She had to look at her hands. “I mean you are so likable. Everyone here likes you,” she babbled quickly.
“I don’t make pancakes for everyone,” he told her softly and she had to look up at him again. Those warm honest eyes. Suddenly she’s back in the time loop. ‘And you…you’d like to…be that someone?’ ‘Not for everyone.’ Oh, God. She has to tell him. Right now.
Well, in the hindsight…She never should’ve distracted him while he was making pancakes.
“You guys are making a smoke grenade or something?” Coulson spoke up the same moment the both of them noticed the burning pancake batter on the pan.
Everyone came back to the Zephyr to say the last goodbye. And by everyone, she means even Andrew, whom May has dragged along after long hours of explaining to him why his wife is a different person from the one he came to know over the years. Telling him she has empathic abilities. She also mentioned that he is Inhuman and their daughter might be as well. It must’ve been an interesting conversation. Daisy would’ve liked to see it.
With all those people coming on board, the spaceship started to become more and more crowded. It’s not that she wouldn’t be happy to have all of them here again after a few days of it being just her, Daniel and Coulson, but she kind of misses the privacy it provided. Maybe that’s why she is tucked away in a corner alone, watching over all of them. Her team. No, not a team. A family. Because teams break apart, families not so much. They always stay together, even if it’s from afar. A family never gives up on you. Well, maybe some families do, some are messed up like that. ‘Like my biological family,’ she thinks. But not this family. They never gave up on her. Yes, there were some initial reservations after she got her powers, but Coulson has never given up on her. Not when she chose the Afterlife over her family in S.H.I.E.L.D.. Not when she broke more than just their hearts after being infected by Hive. Not when she walked away them to become a vigilante after Lincoln sacrificed for her, because of her mistakes. Definitely, not when she started to believe she’s the Destroyer of Worlds. They gave her a chance after chance. They let her grow. She is not the same person she was almost seven years ago. She is not that wide-eyed girl living in her van being obsessed with superheroes and revealing the truth to the world. Skye died in that Kree temple and Daisy Johnson has been born. Or did she? Daisy likes to believe that a small part of Skye is still left somewhere inside of her. She liked Skye. She may have been naïve, but she wasn’t burdened by that darkness Daisy has inside. By those demons and nightmares.
“A time loop?” Daniel asks her.
“Fun, right?” Daisy comments with a sigh, her eyes scanning through the contents of the drawer… ‘Wait, what?’ She looks up confused. They are back in the time storm. ‘No. No, no, no…no. Not again.’ “Daniel? What the hell is-” She starts to say but he cuts her off.
“This is why I wanted to stay with this team. Do you ever have a day when something crazy doesn’t happen?” Daniel asks a little too excited.
“It’s been a while.” She speaks involuntarily. “Hey! Daniel?!” She waves her hands frantically in front of him. He doesn’t notice it.
“Reminds me of my SSR days,” he tells her, nostalgic smile on his lips.
“We just need to get that implant out,” she says and decides to just take the scanner but Daniel stops her.
“Wait! It’s a trap,” he warns her.
“But we don’t know that yet.” Daisy looks at him confused. ‘Why would I say that? We know it’s a trap. This…this has already happened.’
“We do. You said somebody obviously went to the drawer and…,” he pauses. “Simmons was supposed to get the scanner, right?”
“Yeah, until I told her I was gonna do it.” Daisy looks around as the lights start to flicker. ‘Something doesn’t feel right,’ she thinks.
“Every attempt so far has been on Simmons. She’s the one they’re trying to kill,” Daniel says looking at her.
“Maybe, but we still need the scanner.” ‘Oh.’ He’s gonna take it. She can’t let him do it again. She reaches for the scanner but her hand goes right through it. ‘What?’ Fear starts to settle in her bones.
“Right, but if I die, I’ll just, you know…reset. No problem. If you die, you’ll lose your memories and waste all this time relearning everything. Time, we don’t have,” Daniel explains and reaches into the drawer without a second thought, grabbing the scanner.
“What are you doing? This is crazy!” She says trying to move from her place but to no avail.
“This is my purpose. I know that know,” he tells her a flicker of blue in the brown of his eyes. His voice is getting weird. Muffled, like by a static on a radio…
She tries to look around for something, anything to help her take at least one step closer to him so she could take that scanner from him. ‘Something is way off.’
“Why would you-”
“To make sure this worked. To make sure you didn’t try this yourself,” he cuts her off and when she looks up it’s not Daniel standing there anymore, but-
“Lincoln? What…” She pauses, looking at him in shock. He’s wearing the same S.H.I.E.L.D. jacket he had back then. Yo-Yo’s necklace is hanging from his fist. His face is bloody and his blue eyes are piercing through hers. “It was supposed to be me,” she mumbles quietly, tears running down her cheeks. “You should’ve let me die!”
Lincoln gives her a sorrowful smile. “I would never let you die.” His voice is echoing around her. She can feel its vibrations in her bones. “So, it’s fine,” he mutters, a little surprised, looking at the scanner in his hand.
“No! It’s not. Let go of it!” She screams hopelessly. “You can’t just die for me like this. This is wrong!”
Suddenly she hears a weird sound coming from the scanner and Lincoln lets out a groan. A shadow of confusion crosses his face. However, as he leans back against the table he fades in and out like the flickering light above them and finally changes back into Daniel.
“Sousa?!” Daisy calls to him. “Daniel!” He looks up at her with fear in his eyes, blood spilling from his mouth. “No!”
“Hey, hey, hey, Sousa,” her body finally lets her move close to him as he starts slipping to the ground. She tries to lower him more carefully until he sits down. “Hey, Daniel, look at me. It’s gonna be okay,” she tells him, a quiet sob breaking her voice. “It’s gonna reset. You’ll be fine.” She sits down next to him and let him lay down on her lap.
“Why is it taking so long!” She yells into the empty ship. Daisy cups his cheek with one hand and strokes his dark hair with the other one. “Please, stay with me,” she whispers almost inaudibly. “It wasn’t supposed to be like this. The time loop has to reset. It always does!” A stray tear drops on Daniel’s forehead. “Please,” she begs, sobbing. “Daniel!” But he doesn’t hear her anymore.
She watched hopelessly as the last light slipped away from his eyes. She could feel how his heart gave its last weak beat. He was gone. He died for her just like Lincoln did.
Suddenly she feels too much. She feels every vibration around her, but not those she needs to feel. Those of his heartbeat. It’s like her own heart is trying to beat for them both, picking up speed until everything around her shakes. But she doesn’t care anymore. Panic and pain are clawing at her chest making her breathless.
She sees her mom, lying there lifeless after Malick snapped her neck. She sees Enoch. She sees Lincoln floating in midair. Lash. Her mother again. Triplett…The room is becoming filled with bodies of those she cared about but had to die because of her.
“It has to reset,” she mumbles weakly. “It has to reset. It has to reset. It has to reset.” Daisy closes her eyes and hugs Daniel closer.
Daisy.
“Lumley said that we should stay the hell away from you.”
She looks up at the sound of that voice. It’s Coulson. The real one.
“I had a chance at healing up from this,” he points to his chest, “but I gave the serum to you.”
Daisy.
“He said that wherever you go, death follows.”
Daisy!
“He was right.”
Daisy!!
Wake up!
*******************************************************************************************
The plane was shaking. Daniel woke up in his bunk with a start. At first, he thought they are taking off somewhere but that didn’t make sense. None of the four of them knew how to pilot the Zephyr. Daisy managed to fly the quinjet on her first try back in the ‘80s, but that-
Then it hit him. “Daisy!” Those are her quakes…
He jumped out of the bed and stormed into the corridor where he almost collided with Coulson.
“Where’s Daisy?” He asked him worriedly.
“Hey, guys? What’s going on?” A very sleepy Deke looked out from the door of his bunk. “Why is everything shaking? Are we going somewhere?”
“She is in her bunk,” Coulson informed him ignoring Deke completely and Daniel didn’t waste any second standing there as he hurried towards Daisy’s bunk. “I was going through the supplies when this started. I was just about to go check on her. She’s probably having a nightmare.”
Daniel stopped before her doors and faced Coulson with a concerned look in his eyes. “Nightmares cause her to quake?”
“Only the really bad ones. Actually, she didn’t have an episode like this in forever,” he explained with a mixture of sadness and worry. “I think you should check on her.”
Daniel was about to ask him if he’s really okay with it being him but the plane was hit by another strong quake and the light started to flicker above them. He gave a nod to Coulson and opened the doors to Daisy’s bunk.
Daisy was lying mostly still, the only evidence of her discomfort being her tear-streaked cheeks, the way she was grasping at the blanket and her rapid breathing. It physically hurt Daniel to see her like that. So strong and yet so vulnerable.
“It has to reset. It has to reset,” she started mumbling from the dream and another wave of tears slipped from under her eyelids. “It has to reset. It has to reset!”
Daniel was at her side in a second, wiping the tears away from her face and caressing her hair.
“Daisy,” he tried softly.
“It’s about the time loops.” He heard Coulson comment from the doorway.
“Daisy,” Daniel tried again, carefully cupping her face in his hands.
Another, even stronger quake hit the plane. Daniel heard something clatter to the ground and another distinct sound of a breaking glass somewhere in the dining area. He looked around just in time to see Coulson leaving to assess the damage, followed closely by Deke. He turned his focus back to the still sleeping woman.
“Daisy!” He tried more loudly this time.
She whimpered.
“Daisy!! Wake up!”
Her eyes snapped open with a loud gasp. She shot up into sitting position, the unexpected movement almost making him fall from the side of her bed. She was looking around in bewilderment, gasping for air.
“It’s okay,” Daniel told her with a calming voice, his hands going to her face again, forcing her to look at him. “You are safe. It was just a dream.”
“D- Daniel?” Daisy mumbled. Her brown eyes meeting his. They held so much pain and fear.
“Yeah,” he gave her an encouraging smile, his thumb gently stroking her cheek. “I’m here. But Daisy, you have to stop quaking.”
The shaking stopped suddenly. She raised her hand from her lap and softly put it on his chest, right above his heart. He saw a flash of relief on her face before it was replaced by guilt. She looked down.
“Hey! Don’t feel guilty about this. The plane survived a time storm, this was nothing,” he spoke calmingly.
“Is everyone okay?” She asked him quietly.
‘Of course, she would worry about everyone else but herself,’ Daniel thought to himself. He gently raised her chin so she would meet his eyes again.
“Yes,” he assured her. However, the moment he looked into her eyes he saw they no longer held pain or fear or guilt. They were just…empty.
“Daisy?” He started softly. “Do you, uh… Do you want to talk about it?”
She considered it for a moment but then shook her head and let her hand fall from his chest back to her lap, her eyes following.
“Okay. You don’t have to.” Daniel let his hands drop from her face and moved further back to give her some space.
She was sitting there quietly, her long hair cascading around her face, hiding it from him. Daniel realized that the silence is even worse than her quiet sobs while she was still asleep. He wanted to help her somehow but he didn’t want to push her further away by insisting on talking about it. He considered leaving, because maybe she just needed more space but he didn’t want to leave her alone. She shouldn’t be alone not if the nightmare was so bad that it caused quakes.
Daniel thought about what Coulson has said. ‘Was it really about the time loops?’ She hasn’t told him much about what happened in there. He knew only the general stuff Coulson and Daisy told the whole team about after Enoch’s sacrifice. They’ve been in there for a long time, finding a way how to save everyone almost at the last second. Nobody else remembered but the two of them, probably because of their sleeping pods. Some members of the team died during the time loops because Enoch was programmed to kill if anyone tried to remove Simmons’s memory blocking implant. Was her nightmare about that? Possibly. It would give nightmares to anyone.
“Do you want me to leave?” He decided that at least he should give her the option even if he wanted to stay.
She quickly looked at him, a flash of panic crossing her soft features. A clear ‘No’ to him. But then she composed herself and looked away.
“Yes,” she whispered almost inaudibly.
He raised an eyebrow and sighed. She is not making this easy at all.
“I think I’ll stay anyway,” Daniel exclaimed.
“I told you to go,” she looked up at him a light annoyance on her face.
“See, you tell me to leave but you don’t actually want that,” he gave her a small smile.
“How do you know what I want, huh?” She asked him, anger seeping into her voice. “I want to be alone.” Daisy moved further away from him.
“Honestly?” He sighed looking at his hands and then back at her. “I know people like you. Focused on the greater good, even at your own expense. You want people to think you like being alone, even though you always end up back with friends,” Daniel told her and met her eyes again. The annoyance was gone. She was looking at him with a mixture of shock and…surprise? He decided to push his luck further. “You all keep running at the problem full tilt until you either solve it or slam headlong into a brick wall. But you don’t have to deal with the aftermath alone, even though you think so. You should have someone there to pick you back up. Someone to help you unload that burden or share its weight.”
Daisy closed her eyes and let out a long sigh. Few tears escaped from her eyes and she frantically wiped them away. She laughed, but it was a sad laugh.
“I am trying to be angry at you but I can’t. Not after…after you say…that,” she spoke. “You know, we had a very similar conversation in the time loops.”
Daniel raised his brows in surprise but decided to stay quiet and let her continue.
Daisy sniffled. “I asked why you are always there, whether to help me or watch over me, and you gave me the speech you just did. Again.” She looked at him in curiosity. “So, uh, you want to be that person for people like me?”
Daniel gave her a small meaningful smile. “Yes. But not for everyone.”
“You said that, too,” she smiled sadly. “You are right, you know. I…I want you to stay. But I also want you to go. My life’s a mess. I…People I care about tend to get hurt…,” she took a deep breath and added very quietly, “…or worse.”
“Daisy-” Daniel started to say but was cut off.
“I have demons. My past is…” she shrugged and wiped her tears away again.
“We all have skeletons in our closets,” Daniel told her. “I am not scared of yours.”
“You should be,” she murmured.
“Let me be the judge of that. One day. When you are ready.” He decided to risk moving a tiny bit closer and taking her hand in his. He looked into her eyes so she would see that he really means every word he says. “I am not going anywhere.”
For a brief moment, he could see the fight in her eyes. But it was there just for a few seconds. New tears ran down her cheeks but she made no move to wipe them away this time. She moved closer instead and hugged him, burying her face in the crook of his neck.
Daniel’s arms sneaked around her waist pulling her close. He could feel her tears seeping through his shirt. He sighed and when she let out a muffled sob, he comfortingly stroked her back.
“They are all leaving,” she said between sobs. “I’ve never thought it would come to this. They are the only family I’ve ever known.”
His heart ached for her. “And they will never stop being your family. Families change, grow, their members go their separate ways but always come back together.” It made him think of his own family, of his home. He couldn’t even say goodbye and will never see them again. He lost it all in a blink of an eye. But he was supposed to be dead and now he got a second chance at life. As Coulson said - a life after death.
“I know,” she mumbled. “But it won’t be the same.”
“No, it won’t,” Daniel whispered into her hair.
Daisy let out a yawn.
“Maybe you should try to rest a bit more,” he suggested.
She leaned back and he could see the uncertainty mixed with fear in her eyes. She was scared of the nightmares. “Will you hold me? I promise I won’t quake you out of the bed,” she gave him a small teasing grin.
“Whatever you want, Quake,” he teased back and she caught the collar of his shirt and pulled him down with her.
*******************************************************************************************
Daisy knows now that she can’t let her demons stand in the way of her happiness. Those demons are in the past but will always be a part of her. A part she will share with Daniel one day, as well as he will share his own demons. Yes, she is scared that she could lose him like Lincoln but a small part of her has a hope that it won’t happen this time.
‘We are going home.’ Four simple words Daniel said to her in that barn. Words that kept her fighting. Back there it was just a promise to make it back to the Zephyr, because where was home? Her only home were the people on board the Zephyr, her team and family. Where was home for Daniel? She couldn’t ask him then. They plucked him out of his time, his home.
Maybe she is losing her family in some way but maybe she will gain something else. Her own Fitz. Maybe, she already has.
‘We are going home.’ It could be a promise of something else. Now those words could mean more. She can feel that warm fuzzy feeling in her chest when she thinks about it. When she thinks about him. She smiled, her eyes fixed on Daniel as she took a sip from her beer.
“Just kiss him already,” May spoke up from beside her.
Daisy choked and slapped her hand over her mouth to prevent herself from spitting the beer out. She coughed a few times and May hit her on the back.
Privacy. She misses it.
“May! What the hell?!” She exclaimed annoyed and berated herself for not realizing that May sneaked up on her. And her feelings. ‘Shit.’ She gave her a glare.
“Just saying,” the older woman shrugged. “You know, there are bets going around on when you two finally become a couple. Officially. They refused to let me participate because of my empathic powers.”
Daisy groaned and rolled her eyes. “Mack and Yo-Yo already had one bet when we were in the ‘80s. Not sure what it was exactly about but Mack won,” she shrugged thinking that it may have been about the kiss. “You guys are the worst; one doesn’t have any privacy.”
“We are just happy to see you smiling like that. To see you happy again,” she patted her on the arm. “But please, do something about it already because this…tension is killing me.”
“I was going to, but as I said, there is no privacy on this spaceship with all of you here,” Daisy defended her lack of actions. She really wanted to tell him the morning after he stayed with her because of that awful nightmare but Mack and Yo-yo were already back and they probably heard about that nightmare from Coulson because they both wanted to go check on her which ended up in Coulson calling after them: “I strongly advise you not to go there.” She could hear their ‘Why?’ followed by a surprised ‘Oh!’ from Mack. She remembers as she quickly shot out of the bed, Daniel’s confused ‘Daisy?’ following her. She rushed into the corridor with ‘I am fine, thank you’, closing her bunk behind her and added: “No weird assumptions are needed.” The three teammates were looking at her in amusement.
“Yeah, everyone is here, as in here and not there,” May pointed at the bridge since they were all in the cargo bay with the ramp lowered down.
Daisy considered what May was proposing but quickly refused the idea by shaking her head. “Nope.” She could already see the faces of everyone after she and Daniel would be seen leaving the bridge together.
“You can’t wait to get rid of us, can you?” May teased.
“Maybe,” she snickered. “At least I’ll spare him from the if-you-ever-hurt-her threats from you guys.”
“Mack already beat us to it,” May gave her an amused smile.
“Oh God,” Daisy facepalmed.
“While you were on the way to save Simmons and Deke,” the older spy added mischievously.
“What?! But that was a week ago… Oh,” she sighed when she realized that Mack was very quick to do it after she told him about the time loop kiss. But she wasn’t even sure what to do about it back then. Or was she? Why everyone around her seems to know her better then she does? And more importantly - what else did he say to Daniel? She looked towards where both men stood, chatting over the grill.
“Uh, I should probably go check on what they are discussing now,” Daisy said and finished the rest of her beer.
“Go mingle. After all who knows when we get the chance to be together like this,” May smiled sadly and she, too, went to join the others.
Daisy watched her go for a short moment, set the empty bottle on a table, and walked over towards Daniel and Mack.
“Hey, guys. What do you have there? I’m starving.”
*******************************************************************************************
The team spent the rest of the evening and the beginning of the night by sharing their memories, laughing and teasing each other. They remembered their fallen friends and maybe even cried a little. Nobody wanted to be the first to leave. They all knew that when they do leave, it will be the end of their journey as a team. Eventually, Fitz and Simmons decided to go first since their daughter was already sleeping curled up in Jemma’s lap. Fitz said his goodbyes and took still sleeping Diana into the car.
“You know, this isn’t a goodbye,” Jemma told Daisy with shaking voice, tears running down her cheeks. “It’s see you soon.”
“I know,” Daisy sniffled and wrapped her best friend, no, her sister, in a bear hug.
“It would be lovely if we lived close to each other. Diana needs her auntie Daisy,” Jemma mumbled into her shoulder.
“Yeah. That would be great,” Daisy smiled through tears. “I am so happy for you, Simmons. You have Fitz and Diana, your little family,” she moved her hands to Jemma’s shoulders to look her in the eyes. “I know you’ll be okay and that makes this all a little less painful. You won’t be alone.”
The scientist chuckled. “You won’t be alone either,” she said and looked sideways at Daniel, who hovered nearby watching over Daisy, to make her point.
Daisy let out a soft laugh.
“It’s so good to see you this happy again. So, what are you guys planning?” Jemma asked her with a grin.
Daisy shrugged. “I thought that maybe I can take him on a small trip to show him how the world changed. After that…,” she sighed, “I honestly don’t know. I guess we both need to find out where we belong in this new timeline.”
“You’ll figure it out. Together. I’m sure of it,” Jemma told her comfortingly and hugged her again. “I love you, Daisy.”
“I love you too, Jemma.”
After Fitz-Simmons departed, the others left one or two at a time. Mack and Yo-yo were the last ones, leaving almost in the morning hours. Coulson decided to go with them, which really surprised Daisy since the possibility of him leaving too didn’t cross her mind. But as he said, every one of them needs to find a place in this new world and he is not an exception. He assured her he won’t be gone for long.
“It’s just a trip,” he said. “And take care of each other,” he added over his shoulder as he was walking down the ramp.
She stood there, looking after them until she could no longer see the lights of the car. Just like that, they were all gone.
A fresh morning breeze played with her hair. Daisy shuddered. She has heard Daniel walking down the ramp before he put a jacket around her shoulders. She didn’t even realize he went inside to grab it for her.
“Thank you.” She wiped at her tear-streaked cheeks and smiled, not yet looking at him.
“It’s nothing, but you are welcome,” he replied as he stood next to her.
He was so close she could feel the warmth of his shoulder on her own. She could feel the vibrations of his heartbeat. Her hand brushed against his and he took hold of it, their fingers intertwining. That touch grounded her in the moment and place. It assured her that she is not alone. Daisy let out a long content sigh. She knew that now was her time. They were finally alone.
“I need to tell-” she turned to face him but was cut off midsentence after Daniel crossed those few inches between them and pulled her in for a soft kiss. It was short but it caught her off guard. His right hand was still holding hers and his left cupped her cheek. She briefly opened her eyes to look into his and she thought she’s going to drown in that dark chocolate. Whatever she wanted to say was long lost with only one thought on her mind. Daisy leaned in and kissed him back, both her hands grabbing at the collar of his shirt to pull him closer, while his arms snaked around her waist. This kiss was different than the previous one. It was like finally getting a glass of water after dying of thirst in a desert. It was urgent and it left them both breathless. They remained close afterward, trying to catch their breaths. Daisy was beaming and Daniel was looking at her like she was the most precious beautiful thing he has ever seen.
“That was much nicer than our first kiss,” she told him quietly with a playful smile tugging at her lips.
Daniel frowned in confusion. “This was our first kiss.”
“Hmm, not for me,” she hummed, moving her right hand from his neck to his chest. She could see the moment when it hit him.
“The time loops. You kissed me in the time loops,” he said with a light chuckle and shook his head in disbelief.
“Why do you think it was me?” She asked with a gasp and smiled at him teasingly.
“And am I wrong?” He smirked smugly while he stroked her back.
It sent shivers down her spine and she had to force herself to concentrate. “Nope. But you, Mr. Sousa, kissed me back,” Daisy disclosed and pinched him in the chest.
“Hmm, that’s not fair. I don’t remember that,” he gave her a sad look.
“I can make you remember,” she whispered as she caught his face in her hands and brought it down to hers to kiss him again, exactly like in the time loops. Daniel responded to her kiss by pulling her even closer. One hand cupped his cheek and the other sneaked around his neck. She pulled away too soon for his liking.
“It was like this,” she whispered, her hands dropping to his chest.
“Nice,” he smiled. “But short.”
“Oh! So, that was too short for you, huh? We were plummeting towards certain death and needed to trap Enoch,” she told him exasperatedly. “You, Danny-boy are lucky I found the time even for that short kiss.”
Daniel laughed and eventually, Daisy joined in.
“You were so cute. With that soft expression on your face after the kiss. It took everything within me to stop myself from kissing you again,” she admitted while playing with a button on his shirt.
“Were you going to tell me about it?” He wondered.
“I was about to tell you before you kissed me, so…” Daisy shrugged and smiled at him sweetly.
“Hmm, I can do that again,” Daniel offered and his eyes darkened a bit.
“Yes, please,” she breathed.
*******************************************************************************************
Daisy and Daniel were sitting on the cargo bay ramp which gave them a nice view of the horizon. They weren’t really that tired and neither wanted to move from that spot after they exchanged a few more kisses. They sat down and Daisy cuddled into his side. It’s been so long that she watched a sunrise. A start of a new day. The beginning of something new.
“We can’t live on a plane,” Daniel said thoughtfully. “We need a proper place to call home.”
Daisy smiled and slowly looked at him, her eyes roaming over every small detail of his face lighted by the rising sun. His features were relaxed and peaceful. She wanted to imprint this face into her memory to keep it forever.
The words ‘we’ and ‘us’ and the meaning they held used to freak her out. But with Daniel, it’s somehow different. She is not scared of them, on the contrary, hearing them warms her heart. She sighed.
“What?” He asked her, a questioning smile playing on his lips as his eyes melted into hers.
Daisy leaned in and planted a short but sweet peck on his lips. Then she pushed herself back to look at him again, enjoying the soft almost dazed expression on his face.
“I like the sound of that,” she said in a low voice, giving him a lopsided grin.
“Sound of what?”
“Home.”
How am I gonna live my life without this TV show? Without Dousy? I guess we are all gonna meet here to scream after the finale, so see you then! I’ll have to wait until Thursday evening, though.
#daisy/sousa#daisy/daniel#dousy#dousy fic#daisysous#fanfiction#mine#my fanfiction#daisy johnson#daniel sousa#agents of shield#aos#aos fanfic#marvel#fluff#romance#hurt/comfort#friendship#family#home
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fic: hold to the now, the here pt 14 | philinda | AoS | mature
So this is the end, and I've been writing this for over two years, which is the longest I've ever written anything (though there was a huge break) I finished it, and it's an amazing feeling.
Many many thanks to @meanderings0ul, because without your nudge I wouldn't have met the podcast folks and they're so supportive and it's just...everything. I'm so happy in fandom again.
Summary: Daisy visits Coulson to help look after baby agent Iris while May’s in Europe with FitzSimmons.
Notes: set about one year after the wedding. (because one year laters, should be happy, show, and have hugging)
"Hi Daisy, thanks, here." Coulson deposits a slightly sticky toddler in her arms the moment she has her coat off. "Iris, say hi to Daisy."
The tiny little being in her arms stares for a long quiet moment. "Oh you look just like mommy now, with the face."
"Mama," Iris repeats and Daisy looks to Coulson.
"Everything okay?"
He sounded kind of frazzled on the phone as he'd tried to give her directions from the nowhere airport Bobbi had dropped her off at to the nowhere town he and May were living in. GPS found it no problem because there wasn't anything to find but pine trees.
"Mama's okay," Coulson says, kissing Iris' head and meeting Daisy's eyes for a moment. "She'll be back later, I have to get some work done, can you amuse her for a while?"
"Yeah, I'll try."
"Thanks." Coulson touches the baby again then he disappears into his office and it's just Daisy and the kiddo.
"No," Iris says, staring at the floor. "No."
"No means down or no means not down?"
Kid could really squirm when she wanted to.
"No!"
Daisy sets her down and that seemed to be what she wanted. Iris crawls over to a bookshelf and starts pulling all the books off one at a time, looking at them for a moment before making a little mountain. She seems happy enough so Daisy sits on the floor next to her, watching.
Books with bright covers stack on top of each other. Daisy picks them up, looking at the dinosaurs and planes, then one is shoved into her hands.
"This one?"
Iris doesn't nod. She stares, and it's disconcerting getting a May death glare from someone who only weighs twenty-five pounds. Can she say yes? Is yes harder than no?"
"No."
"No, I don't like this one or no- please read this to me?"
Iris squinches her chubby face then crawls into Daisy's lap. She makes an expectant noise and hits the book.
"Okay, I got it."
The book seems to be about a pigeon who is a private eye, except it's full of puns that are actually really funny, but Iris turns the pages as soon as she gets bored of them, which is fast, so Daisy's not really sure what's going on. The pictures are nice. She can't really read it because the kid doesn't have the patience so she comments a few things.
"Bird."
Iris looks back, waiting.
"It's a bird, kid. I don't know what kind. Red."
"Bye."
"Bye is like bird."
"No."
"No?"
"Oh no." Iris turns the book to the beginning and waits. When Daisy doesn't start reading, she makes a noise. Iris makes a noise again, more insistent and hits the book.
"Sorry kid," Daisy starts, "where were we? Right, the pigeon is sitting in his office, wearing a tie like daddy's because of course a detective would wear a tie."
Iris makes a delighted noise and hits one of the illustrations, a brightly coloured bird. She looks back at Daisy, almost hitting her in the nose with her dark little head.
"Yeah? That's good?"
And then they're at the beginning again. Daisy's not sure how many times they read the book, but she's made up her own plot by the fifth time and decided there should be a sequel later.
Bored of that, Iris shoves off Daisy's lap and skips the pile of books to start pulling down toys. No toddler needs this many toy airplanes, and yet, kid has quite a collection, also a really nice toy version of a Zephyr and two SHIELD badges that look a little chewed on.
"Is she supposed to have your badges?" Daisy yells up towards the office. No response. Figures. Walking over she tries to listen for what Coulson's doing, but maybe he has headphones on. When she looks back, Iris is gone and Daisy's heart jumps into her throat.
Fuck. Where could she?
Daisy jogs into the kitchen and Baby Agent is sitting in front of the fridge, legs crossed, looking expectant.
"Hey, sorry, I didn't know you were so fast."
Iris hits the fridge with her hand and makes the 'read my book' noise. Kind of like an excited puppy.
"You need something?" What time is it? Should she feed her? Does she need a snack? What do kids eat? Daisy has to scoop her up to open the fridge and they stare into it together. It's healthy, of course, because it's Coulson and May's fridge, but she can't just hand the kid a carrot.
Can she?
Iris pulls a bag of salad and an onion out of the drawer before Daisy can stop her. She takes a big bite of the onion and looks immediately offended.
"Okay, you want to bite something?"
"Abyye." Iris says, like Daisy speaks baby.
"Apple?"
"Up-ah."
"Apple?" Daisy asks again, grabbing one from the counter. "This?" Holding it up gets two hands in the air, reaching for the fruit. "Okay, here."
She hands over the apple before it occurs to her that she can't just hand a kid a whole unwashed unpeeled apple...and it's too late because the kid has the apple in her mouth and she takes a huge bite, but Iris has tiny teeth and it's a little mouthful of apple skin she spits out before taking another bite.
"Good?"
Iris smiles over the apple and keeps biting. She chews and spits out a lot of it, but at least she's entertained. Daisy grabs the kid and her apple and heads to the stairs. Lugging Iris up the steps with her, she pauses outside the door to the office. She shouldn't listen, but it sounds like Coulson's on the phone. They should leave him to it, maybe it's May, or FitzSimmons, wasn't she going out there to help them with something?
"Ap-uh," Iris repeats, holding up the partially gnawed apple.
"Apple," Daisy echoes. "You'll get it."
Holding her apple up to Daisy, Iris grins. "Uh."
"Apple."
"Um," Iris says, holding up with more intention. "Um!"
"Yum?" Daisy tries, pretending to take a bite.
"Um." Iris agrees, delighted. She mashes the apple into Daisy's face. "Um."
"Thank you, no thank you."
"No, um." That seems to mean, yes, eat my sticky, slobbery, mangled apple.
So she does. What else can she do. Daisy takes a bite of the least sticky part and Iris laughs.
"Glad you're happy. Come on, let's see what else we can do."
All the airplanes are sticky and on the floor after they've done that for five minutes. Pieces of apple cling to Daisy's hair, there's water and a squished cracker inside her bra somehow but Iris thinks it's the most hilarious thing if Daisy builds a tower and then quakes it down so they start stacking the blocks again.
Tower six has died for Iris' amusement when Coulson finally comes down the stairs.
"No," Iris yells at him. "No, no."
"Yes, yes, daddy," Coulson teases her, scooping her up so she squeals. "What are you two doing?"
"Pulling everything down from everywhere."
"That happens."
"We shredded an apple."
"We have a good vacuum."
"But we found a good game, watch." Daisy indicates the blocks, then quakes down tower number seven.
Iris laughs and squirms and immediately wants down so she can build tower eight for sacrifice.
"How's it going?" Daisy asks while they watch Iris stack.
"Oh you know, May's stuck doing field work with FitzSimmons somewhere in Finland and Mack swears none of them are actually on this mission he just really needs trustworthy people.
"Sounds great."
"Sure." Coulson takes a breath, then sits on the sofa, dropping his head in his hands. "I'm sorry, do you need anything?"
"Me?"
"Yeh, you came all this way and I don't have coffee or anything."
"I can make coffee."
"Right, you could do that."
"Sit, watch Agent Danger here and call me when she's ready for me to destroy her tower."
"You're sure?"
"I'll make coffee, I need it, you look like you need coffee injected."
"If only that worked." Coulson shuts his eyes, leaning back.
"How long are you stuck doing the single dad thing?"
"A few more days, she's trying to get back."
"She must miss Baby Agent terribly."
Coulson nods, smiling at Iris. "She does, they haven't been apart this long Iris' whole life, but FitzSimmons really needed her."
"Well, of course. She does everything."
Daisy makes coffee, listening to Iris and Coulson's strange conversation. His side has words and sentences, Iris' side seems to consist of "No" and little screeches. She sets black coffee on the table next to the sofa and Coulson grins.
Coulson and Iris yell "Oh no," in union as Baby Agent knocks down the tower. This is what he does all day? Build and destroy, read the same book fifty-nine times?
"So she gets back when, Tuesday?"
"Maybe Wednesday."
"Wow." Daisy sits next to him with her own coffee, shaking her head. "That's a lot."
"Free for the weekend? Iris and I would love to have you."
"Yeah," Daisy agrees. She has plenty of leave saved up and she doesn't get to do domestic very often. Kiddo's pretty sweet too and it seems like Coulson needs the help. "Seems like you need some help with towers."
Iris crawls to Daisy and pulls herself up on her knees, bouncing a little as she babbles.
"I think that means she wants you to stay."
"Okay. You've got me. Can't say no to baby May face."
"Doesn't she look just like her?"
"Yeah, it's almost creepy."
It's a whirlwind of time with Coulson and Iris. There's constantly something they need to be doing, where is she, is the kiddo okay, what is she into? Does she need a diaper, where are her extra clothes, going to the grocery store is a full on mission and Daisy's not sure how much help she is, but he definitely needs back up. Even if she's just moral support.
And it's nice to see him laughing while they try to get shampoo out of Iris' hair and how far the kid can throw noodles (definitely some Mamma May in there). So she and Coulson trade off making coffee and picking up take out and reading and it feels like she's been there forever by the time it's finally Wednesday.
Coulson rocks and sings (Daisy did not know he sang) but Iris is out for a nap and Coulson's trying to get work done and Daisy sits and plays with her phone because it feels like she hasn't done that in hours.
Maybe hasn't, Iris is a lot.
She doesn't remember falling asleep, but she did, sitting on the sofa in the warm sunlight. Coulson touches her arm, shaking her gently.
"Hey, sorry, could you go get May from the airport? She's going to be back and I don't want to wake up Iris or have her wake up while I'm gone and be all difficult for you."
"Good call."
"She's back?"
"About an hour. You have time to get coffee, it's a tiny airport."
"Where's the coffee?"
"Down to the main road, turn left twice. It's a drive through with a moose."
"A moose?" Daisy shakes her head. "You do live in the middle of nowhere."
"It has perks."
"Never waiting in traffic?"
"No one notices the quinjets."
"See, I knew it was something." Daisy drags herself up as Coulson hands her keys to the really nice BMW SUV thing they got because carseats don't fit in Lola. "This one I'm allowed to drive?"
"It's May's."
"Great."
"You'll be fine, just don't spill coffee in her car."
Daisy shakes her head and leaves him to finish lesson planning or whatever it is he's working on. The coffee shop with the moose is exactly where Coulson said it was, and she grabs a cup before driving to the nowhere airport by the lake. There's only one flight coming in that hour. It's a little connector flight from Chicago with only a handful of people on it.
Coulson would probably get a May a tea or something so Daisy grabs a green tea from the little kiosk in the airport and holds it with her arms crossed over her chest, waiting for May to come off the plane.
May's third from last off the flight, her bag over her shoulder. She looks across the handful of people, then smiles at Daisy.
"I was wondering if he'd send you."
"Got you tea. Baby Agent was napping so you get me."
May hugs her, warm and strong, and then takes her tea. "It's nice to see you."
"How was Scotland?"
"Wet, and rainy, in Finland it snowed." Her smile fades a little and she touches her forehead. "It was good to see Fitz and Simmons. They're happy."
"Annoyingly so?"
"A little."
Daisy takes the keys out of her coat pocket and hands them over. "Coulson let me drive your car."
May smiles and shakes her head. "You can drive."
Taking the keys back, Daisy tries to hide her surprise. "Okay..."
"I have a headache."
"You don't have to have a reason, you just always drive and I--"
May smiles at her. "You're a good driver."
"You've let me drive literally once because you were pregnant and something-" she pauses, trying to remember, "-was it paint? Something set your stomach off."
"Wet paint."
"Were they painting the plane?" Daisy teases, leading May out of the airport towards the parking lot.
"N, sometimes I get headaches."
"Like a normal person?" Daisy touches the door handle and it opens. May sets her bag in the back seat and climbs into the passenger seat.
"I don't get to be a normal person?"
"You pulled a piece of pipe out of your leg and fought aliens, flew a plane when you couldn't stand up and were in labor for what, like half a day before you admitted it hurt?"
May laughs, leaning back in the seat. "Don't see why any of that means I can't have a headache."
"I don't mind driving, it's just, weird."
"I'll let you drive more in the future."
"So I don't think it's weird and you're knocked up whenever it happens?"
"Is that really the only time I've let you drive?"
"Yes, that's really the only time you've let me drive. I mean, Coulson let me drive Lola when he didn't have a hang so I'm used to it."
May reaches over and pats her shoulder. "We're both just stuck in our ways, getting old and stubborn."
"You're both stubborn, but your're not old."
"Thanks." May takes a sip of her tea and shuts her eyes.
"Do you have painkillers in the glove box or anything?"
"It's fine."
"You have a headache, normal people take things when they have a headache because they don't like suffering."
"Home is twenty minutes away." May holds her tea against her forehead, then sets it in the cupholder.
"We can stop."
"You sound like Phil."
"I guess you need him to look after you."
"You do fine, Daisy."
She can't win this argument, so distract May, tell her nice things. "So Iris made me read the same book a billion and seven times."
"Sounds like her."
"And then she destroyed an apple."
"Eating with teeth is hard."
"I guess so."
"And we made towers."
"Good." May sighs, keeping her eyes closed. "Thank you for coming, I bet Phil appreciated having you."
"Sure, Coulson sounded like he needed back up."
"He did, I dropped a lot in his lap to help FitzSimmons."
Daisy reaches over, squeezing her hand. May's hand is warm and damp against Daisy's fingers, and she squeezes back as if she were hugging her tight. "It was nice for me to help."
"I'm glad."
"Baby Agent's adorable, it's peaceful here. We took her for walks and watched the stars come out. When she's bigger, she can play in the woods and all you'll have to worry about is moose."
"There aren't actually moose here."
"What about the coffee shop?"
May opens her eyes again and smiles. "That one doesn't move."
Chuckling, Daisy takes a breath and just enjoys this moment. She missed May too. Being with her is comfortable and familiar, and Daisy missed her over the last week. Being with Coulson and Baby Agent was great, but May was missing and now that she's back it just feels like coming home.
"So any news from FitzSimmons you're allowed to say?"
"The published some new papers, remodelling a cottage."
"No playmates for Iris yet?"
"Not yet." May looks forward for a while, staring at the road, then turns to Daisy. "But soon though."
"Soon? Jemma's pregnant?"
"No, no." May stares straight ahead, but she smiles, Daisy can hear it in her voice. "I am."
"Wait, what?"
"Eyes on the road."
"Yeah, I got it, not going to smash your car, but what?"
"We had another embryo frozen, from when we got pregnant with Iris. We were near the clinic on the mission for Simmons, and I wanted to surprise Phil."
Surprise? "I suppose that's the fun part of having medical help. You can surprise the dad when you end up pregnant." The world tastes like an alien concept, as weird as Kree or Asgard. "Shit, congrats, I mean."
"Thanks Daisy." May turns, leaning against the door so she can look at Daisy better. .
"You okay, really?"
"I'm thrilled."
Yeah, that's what thrilled looks like, kind of pale and really tired, except May is happy. She radiates it. "That's wonderful. Second kid, huh? Everyone's going to lose it."
"You think so?"
"I can just picture Jemma and Fitz, Mack and Elena settling some bet."
"Which side did you bet on?" .
"Should have bet yours." Fuck. two tiny little field agents destroying everything? They should unretire just to get some peace. Yet they're both so fucking happy, and they're good parents. Iris is great, and she's so smart, and this one.
They sit in silence for a while, and if possible, May's even more pale when Daisy looks at her. "You okay?
"I forgot how brutal the hormone shots are." May shuts her eyes again and Daisy remembers how much time they spent trying to keep her from throwing up when she was pregnant with Iris. She knew what this was going to be like and she did it anyway.
"You're a really good mom."
May opens her eyes, surprised. "Why do you say that?"
"Iris is the cutest little person and sure, she screams and throws things sometimes, but she's so content and trusting. I remember seeing kids who had bad parents in my foster homes and they were so broken already, even the little ones. I'm not used to happy toddlers."
"Daisy-"
"And you know how much it sucks to be pregnant and having a baby hurts-"
"-It's not that bad."
"And you can say that!" Daisy pulls into the driveway and stops, shaking her head as she turns off the engine. "You're a great mom."
May pauses, looks at her and doesn't say anything for a long time. She smiles, her eyes impossibly soft. "Thanks Daisy."
Daisy gets out of the car, grabbing May's bag as she comes around. May moves a little slower, holding the car for a moment, so the headache must be bad.
Daisy touches her shoulder, then hugs her again. "Iris is lucky, the new baby agent is really lucky too."
"We're lucky we have you." May's hands hold her tight and it's like that mom energy's rubbing off. She's loved, and it's so easy that Daisy just stands there in awe for a moment. She didn't have a family before SHIELD, and now she's loved.
They walk in together, still holding hands because that's cool, that's something they do. Coulson's on the floor, playing with Iris, who looks up when the door opens with the biggest smile.
"Mama!"
"Come here, Li." Iris crawls over and May grabs her before she's gone a few feet. They spin around, May laughing as Iris pats her face, babbling happily about Mama, over and over. Coulson watches them with the softest expression she's ever seen and that's what love looks like, not that silly romance novel kind, but the exhausted, will do anything for you, this is everything kind of love. It's just his face, and Daisy touches his arm, then hugs him.
"Pretty cute, huh?"
"Iris looks so much like Melinda, luckily."
"You're in there too, dad."
"I know, but the two of them, they're everything."
Daisy raises her eyebrows because fuck he's going to freak and she should like, give them space, but she'd also love to see what he's going to say. He's totally going to cry.
"Did you have a good time with Daisy and daddy?"
"Aysee," Iris repeats, waving her arm towards Daisy. "Aysee."
"That's pretty close," May says, kissing Iris's head. "What a smart girl."
"She was great, they both were."
"I was telling Daisy in the car how much it meant to us that she came to help."
"She let me drive and everything."
"Oh?" Coulson tilts his head, and takes a moment to welcome May back, hugging her and Iris, then kissing her forehead. "You okay?"
"I can let Daisy drive without something being wrong."
"Uh-huh," Coulson teases, as unconvinced as Daisy was. "Jet lag?"
"Headdache."
"I'll make tea."
"I've got it," Daisy says. "You have to welcome her back and stuff."
May kisses Iris' cheek once more and sets her down when the toddler starts to squirm. "She means do the kissing while she's in the kitchen."
"Oh, I see, I can do that." Coulson leans in, kissing her deeply and yeah, it's a good time to make some tea.
Iris babbles to herself in the living room, hitting her blocks together and making some kind of running commentary while her parents are totally making out.
Daisy puts the kettle on and waits, watching the comforting blue light. There's a green ginger that's probably good. Coulson will need coffee. She's grinding beans and setting up the pot when Iris crawls into the kitchen, dragging a toy kangaroo. She holds it up, then flings her arms up to be picked up.
"Hey kiddo."
"Aysee!"
"That's me I guess. Mom and dad okay?"
"Mama," Iris repeats, delighted.
"Yeah, Mama's home."
"Iris is in here," Daisy calls, just in case they're worried. "We're just making coffee."
"Don't turn her to the dark side, Daisy," May calls from the living room and then she laughs, really laughs and Daisy's both curious and grateful that she's not in the living room, watching whatever's happening.
They seem to be done by the time she's back, and they're just sitting on the couch, hands wrapped around each others, May's head on his shoulder.
"Mama," Iris says again, reaching her arms out and Daisy hands her over.
"I missed you."
"She missed you too."
"I swear she's bigger."
"Not much taller, must get that from you."
May laughs and shakes her head. "Don't listen to daddy, he's silly."
Iris pats Coulson's face with her fingers, and just beams to be between both of them. It's cute, like painfully cute and Daisy brings drinks and sits on the floor next to them and just watches.
"Aysee," Iris pleads, reaching for her.
"Daisy, come up. We're not going down to the floor."
Daisy sits next to May and Iris crawls over her legs, peering at her coffee before deciding to crawl back to Coulson.
"I think I've actually finished Ulysses-- " Coulson starts to say, still toying with May's hair.
"I'm pregnant."
"What?"
The house is completely quiet, even Iris stares, chewing on her toy kangaroo.
"Really?"
"Simmons and I were near the clinic in Sweden and I thought--"
Coulson laughs, rubs his chin, and then kisses May hard enough that Daisy pulls Iris out of the way before she can interrupt them.
"Surprise."
"I love surprises."
"I know."
"Not as much as I love you." He rests his hand on her belly and there's the tears. His eyes shine and dammit, Daisy's the last person who should be crying but it's just really nice.
Kind of wonderful.
"Good."
"Good?"
"Life without surprises would be dull, life without me would be-"
"Absolutely unbearable," Coulson interrupts, then kisses her. "Baby Agent the second. You're amazing."
May touches his cheek and smiles. "I know, you can show me later."
"You're going to be a big sister," Daisy tells Iris, who shakes her head because she's still much better at no than yes. "That's a big responsibility."
"She has a great role model," May says.
Fuck, that's not fair. Daisy was close to crying, but she wasn't, and she's not Iris' big sister, except, maybe she is, and maybe that's okay and maybe they all love her just as much as she loves them.
It's all pretty fucking amazing.
"We love you," Coulson whispers, patting her shoulder. Iris gets way too into the patting and it's basically swatting but she's little. "We'll love you more if you can take some time off next summer, about eight months from now."
May laughs and nods. "You'd be a big help."
"Yeah, yeah as long as you need."
May hugs her with one arm, and she curls in because May's warm and she's home. They all are.
#philinda#fic: hold to the now the here#wow it's been a ride#but I made it!#thanks so much to philindacast#you are the best dears#and meanderings0ul
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Fitzsimmons Family Headcanons in case canon fails me
And before they destroy them. Buckle up.
(I wrote this in less than an hour and english is not my first language, sooo sorry for any mistakes)
Edit: I re-posted it because it wasn’t showing up in the tags. sorry.
Enjoy! (Gift credit: X)
They finally decide to retire to their cottage.
Daisy and May lived with them for a while but at different times. Daisy around the time their first kid was born and May when the youngest was a kid already.
May and Daisy totally live together in the USA.
Fitzsimmons started a biomedical company, they make prostetics and medical supplies. They fund small researchers and become relatively known in the medical field (under aliases of course). They run their company from their home as much as they can.
Deke got bored of his company, so he eventually fused it with FS’s, he has enough money to travel around the world and be whatever he wants. Once was a TV chef, and he got bored and became a travel blogger, then launched a clothing line so it goes…
Tried to convince the team to turn their story into a broadway musical. They all said no. He brings it up everytime they are all together (you never know)
Fitzsimmons have three kids, they were all planned ;) of course
Daisy teases Fitz about how the three of them look like Jemma. “You are adopted”. the son is the only one who kinda looks like him. Fitz doesn’ t mind.
After the kids go their own ways they leave together again.
Have their own quinjet in case of emergencies, they say. Let’s be honest after years of flying with SHIELD, commercial flights lost their charm.
Look retired Fitzsimmons would be that kind of couple who travels the world together (properly this time), they say the quinjet is to visit their friends and Family around the world but would randomly send pictures of them in front of a famous landmark.
Mackenzie Skye Fitzsimmons (Daisy calls her Kye) (Born around 2021) (Quarantine baby) or (Timetravel baby)
They never asked Deke about their daughter’s name in the original timeline, but once they told him, judging by his reaction they knew it was this. (but in the lighthouse timeline her nickname was Kenzie)
Fitz was really adamant on this name, Jemma thought it was cute and a great way to honor their best friends, but years later he told the kid:
“you were named after two of the bravest persons I’ve ever met”.
Jemma just stared into the space as it dawned on her that her husband was really an idiot.
He winked at her and she forgave him. Eventually.
When she was a toddler Fitzsimmons moved back to the city and left their cottage, they wanted their daughter to have the best education and also didn’t want to wake her up early because the closest school was still an hour away.
Around that time Daisy found Bobbi, they met up, and Bobbi introduced her to her baby son Owen.
“oh my god. I need to call Fitzsimmons”
“what”
“shhhh. wait, it’s connecting... Hey guys! Look who is here! Bobbi and her baby Owen Shaw”
Fitz spits his tea all over his phone. Bobbi doesn’t know what’s going on, and they eventually explain it to her, well, after Daisy stops laughing and Fitz stops coughing.
Bobbi and Hunter had changed names and moved to England. After learning that Fitzsimmons live nearby, they make plans to see each other as much as they can. Look this is my headcanon AU so Fitzsimmons offer them positions in their company, Bobbi in the lab and Hunter in a made up security position that doesn’t fit his nametag.
Some weekends Fitz and Hunter take the babies to the park together, while Jemma and Bobbi work or hang out together. One day kye and Owen were playing and Owen proudly declared he was going to be an astronaut. Fitz was like “you and your son are the bane of my existence”.
The kids become best friends. Duh
BUT this is Bobbi and Hunter we are talking about, they’re nomads so they eventually move out around Europe and America, when the kid started high school they agreed to stay in one place.
Anyways,
Amazing kid, took a while for her parents to figure out the whole parenting thing but she was so great, as long as things went her way.
Fitz can’t say no to her. A dog? We’ll manage. Ice cream for breakfast? c’mon you know how convincing she can be.
She is a really calm kid, well behaved. Responsible older sister, mom friend, but messy af. “look mom, I have a system and I know where everything is”.
Nicest kid you’ll ever meet, but if you mess with her siblings be careful, you never know if you will find trash in your backpack.
She is an MD. Eventually, her parents moved back to the countryside but she stayed in the city with her sister to finish her education.
Makes friends everywhere she goes.
She and Owen started dating in their teens but were on and off several times, they even briefly dated other people because one of them would get scared of things becoming too serious (even more when they learned that Uncle Deke was genetically their son).
In their late twenties they decided to get married as a compromise to stay together and work things out, after all, some things are inevitable.
They had two kids: Daniel Shaw (Deke, but They wanted him to be his own person so they changed the name), Gabrielle Shaw (Born as Oliver Shaw)
Owen worked for a while for SWORD. Eventually decide to move to Germany to work as researchers.
Margaret Abigail Fitzsimmons (Maggie) (Born 2025)
The odd one. Grew up to be a successful artist. Really independent as a child, could play hours by herself or caually chill around her parents or her brother’s crib.
Despite being the only one in her family who isn’t into science, she loves doing experiments all the time, in the name of aesthetic. One time turned the dog blue. There’s a fire extinguisher in the living room just because of her. Banned from her parents’ lab “Pretty colors can go boom”. Aparently.
After being constantly told she is diferent from the rest of her family, she feels happy when someone tells her she looks like her mom. She scoffs but she doesn’t really mind.
Acts though but is a softie, vegan, activist, animal lover. Loves to tease everyone, prankster, makes fun of her mom but it’s the first person she thinks of when something troubles her. Late night calls are not unheard of.
Can’t commit to a single hobby. Photography, cooking, volunteer work... name something, and she has probably already tried it.
Really close to Deke, sometimes travels with him. They are kindred spirits. Feel like only them understand the need to explore and try new things.
She grew up to resent shield. Look she loves what her parents and their friends did, but hates how it affected them. Forgive and forget? in this economy??
Lives in Paris by herself but somehow always manages to get everyone to come to her art exhibits. You won’t be able to stop her once she sets her mind to something. Stubborn as her dad.
Doesn’t want kids, maybe one day if she feels ready she will adopt but she is happy as an aunt.
Matthew Phillip Fitzsimmons (Matthew) (Born 2030)
Ray of sunshine, Momma’s boy. He loves it when his parents take him to their lab. Ever since he could walk he is always following his sisters around, if they are up to something he is the first one to know. They love to tease him, but he has enough blackmail material to get them to shut up. He would never use it tho.
Computer genius. He has his own video game company. Launched his first video game at 16. Fitz is mildly offended he sees the Framework code as “old stuff”.
He is a sweetheart, adores his parents and calls them every single day. He met his wife in college and has been happy ever since. It was fast and passionate, they got married within a year and a few years later they had a baby.
Truly an example of living fast.
Melissa Fitzsimmons (his daughter) a sweetheart, may is her godmother. (The babies’ baby’s baby, i cry). The cousins are thick as thieves.
May loves the kid, “age is making you softer”, Daisy tells her and laughs, May’s glare while holding a baby is too much for her.
Emma Johnson (born 2029) (the honorary fourth kid)
Daisy’s daughter. Jemma cried when she told her the baby’s name. She wanted May and Jemma in the delivering room with her.
I can see Daisy being a badass single mother but I also see her finding love, I haven’t made up my mind but I think she will be loved either way.
Only child, so loves to hang out with the FS kids.
She and Matthew are best friends since they were little, even having video calls when they couldn’t see each other in person.
Fitz and Daisy had a bet on whether they would get together, but it was called off when it became apparent Emma wasn’t interested in men altogether. She was the first woman in his wedding.
The “Quake” legacy was too much for her so she decided to focus in something different. Currently works as an architect and on her spare time works as a freelance illustrator.
All I can imagine is a scene where the are all together in a field (probably the same one where they buried Coulson and Loop!Fitz) May, Fitzsimmons and Daisy. They try to meet up there at least once a year to chat and reminisce about old times, sometimes with Deke, Mack and Elena (and their twin boys) or just them.
Their kids are playing while their parents watch, but May’s watching them, with their backs to her they almost look like the kids she met in the bus all those years ago. Coulson would’ve been so proud, this is the future we were fighting for all along, she thinks.
“You did good”.
Daisy turns around with a soft smile on her face and says “yes, we did.”
The end
#Fitzsimmons#fstag#fsfic#agents of shield#agents of s.h.i.e.l.d.#Jemma simmons#Leo fitz#Daisy Johnson#Melinda May#SHIELD headcanons#I have hope that i will like their ending#this is how i see them right now#I will probably adapt them to fit whatever happens in the finale
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