#d-eris-t enemy
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#welcome back#dearest enemy#wait wait i think i got a pun#d-eris-t enemy#gosh i'm still as clever as ever#THAT RHYMED#IM A GOD
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I have no brain cells. For TsT, can I ask for a directors cut/commentary/ramble about one of your favorite scenes in any story, and why? From a more technical perspective? If that even makes sense?
ABSOLUTELY you can!! Thank you so much!!
I think I'll do a director's cut on Vestalia, one of my newer Eris/Rick fics, since I was really pleased with how that one turned out :D
Under the cut for space, as usual :D And fair warning.... this one got LONG!
Talk Shop Tuesday
So first things first, this fic was SUPER impromptu. I was brainstorming ideas for Deep Freeze, the other new Eris fic, at the time... but it turns out that writing a hypothermia whump fic in the dog days of summer is a little hard. I was out walking my dogs, trying to brainstorm Deep Freeze, when instead the idea for Vestalia popped into my head.
“She left her key. Under the doormat.” they responded, setting it down on the kitchen counter as they passed, “Stupid place to hide a key, I think. Especially if it unlocks something valuable.” “Tch. Yeah. My shit apartment’s so worth robbing.” he muttered, shaking his head without looking up. “I don’t mean the apartment.”
First little hint at how much Eris cares about him... that "something valuable" is of course Rick himself, and he notices. At this point in their timeline, Eris has known Rick for about 5 and a half years, and they've danced in and out of that romantic space up until he started dating June, but it was all still so nebulous that neither of them are entirely sure how connected they are to one another.
And honestly, even as brash and sharp as Eris is at the beginning of this piece, it's that little admission that convinces Rick to let her stay - without that show of how Eris cares about him, he'd probably have just told him to fuck off.
Eris found himself relaxing, with that little reminder gone. The emotion still filled the room like a New England fog, but it was easier without the physical reminder written across his face. They couldn’t remember the last time they’d seen so much candid emotion from him.
Part of why Eris likes and respects Rick so much is because of how steady he is - he's coolheaded and adaptable in the middle of battle, he wrangles the Suicide Squad and even manages to make those supervillains into his friends and allies, and he all-around acts as a bit of an anchor compared to Eris' whirlwinds. But by that same token, that steadiness makes seeing him so rattled and emotional completely foreign to Eris. He's trying his best because of how he cares for Rick, but he is not used to being the anchor or emotional support in the relationship.
Eris suppressed a shiver, that ancient beast in the depths of their heart just beginning to stir. They battled it down. Not now. Not for Rick, and especially not when he was so vulnerable.
As we see here, Eris' sense for conflict is not entirely within her control. I'll go into this more with a future fic showcasing more of Eris' backstory, but it's something he was born with, and his upbringing on Themyscira led him to lean into it rather than being given the support to process it in a healthy way.
Conflict really does affect Eris - not only makes them stronger, heal faster, but it makes them more quick-to-anger and prone to violence. Normally he embraces that and isn't afraid to cause damage, but instead... he fights it down, for Rick's sake.
“You never expect to be blindsided. You give too much of your heart away. You let someone wrap you around their little finger, and you let them use you up when they decide they’re done with you. You make friends out of your enemies but never expect the tables to turn the other way. And it gets you into trouble.”
Eris says this, fully aware that they're also under this umbrella. They're referring to the Squad and all the supervillains Rick works with, and how he tends to get attached to the people he works with, but Eris also sees herself included in that. He has no intention of betraying or harming Rick (though tbh... internally he still has a skewed perception of himself as a "monster" for how he was treated on Themyscira), but he also recognizes the patterns here - making friends out of someone who's an enemy to just about everyone else, being unfailingly attentive and caring no matter how much Eris feels like they don't deserve it, taking the risk of getting close knowing it could go wrong in some way or another.
And in a way... Eris reflects those same words. He may not be as openly affectionate as Rick is, but he's still intensely loyal, and keeps giving his heart away no matter how many times he's had to watch his past lovers age and die - or worse, he's been blindsided and manipulated by those who wanted a pet weapon (when 90% of your relationships are war heroes... they're not always the shining examples of humanity, let's just put it that way)
“She’s just lost one of the good ones. Perhaps one of the only good ones left. She’ll never find another one like you.”
This is HARD for Eris to admit. Like I said before, they're not good with comfort or feelings by any means, and even this fairly simple admission is difficult for them. Eris' affection is... not exactly "human", and more often takes place in actions rather than words, so this is odd for them.
“Too torn up to appreciate it, I think. Waste of good whiskey.”
Full disclosure, I know NOTHING about alcohol, so I tried to be as vague about this whole "fancy vintage whiskey" piece as possible, lol. But a bit of backstory on Eris: she has a whole hidden collection of preserved vintage alcohols - partially for her own enjoyment, since she loves a good vintage bourbon even if the alcohol itself won't do a damn thing for him, but also for a bit of quick cash. He doesn't really have other income, and doesn't really need it, but vintage alcohols sell really well when he needs some cash.
It wouldn’t do much of anything for him - the last time he’d been anywhere near drunk was back on Themyscira, with a good strong Amazonian wine - but it was a damn fine whiskey either way.
I do think it would be interesting to see Eris with a type of alcohol that does affect him - the Amazonian wine I mentioned here, or some other type of alcohol made for metahumans. I honestly feel like it could make a good fluff fic: I could see Eris as a surprisingly cuddly drunk, the same way they're cuddly when they're sleepy, and Rick taking care of them since it's been several hundred years since Eris has last been properly intoxicated.
“Thought we were doing okay. Not… great, but okay. And that’s a lot of what relationships are, I think. Or just… how life is. You get through the okay times and the good ones come along again eventually. But I guess not. Not with her, at least.”
Look, I've got nothing against June Moone as a character, I really don't. I'm not a huge Cara Delevigne fan, but I'm really just neutral on June as a character. But I didn't want to write her out entirely, especially since their relationship is tied to the first Suicide Squad movie, plus I think it makes for some good tension/angst with Eris here.
I also didn't want to turn this into the old "this relationship just Sucked, time for the Real One" stereotype when it comes to them: Rick and June did work for a while, it was a genuinely good relationship, and it just came down to their inability to live together long-term that made the relationship break. I mean... that's how it usually is, right? Most relationships don't end because there's something genuinely wrong with one of the parties, it's just that something doesn't quite work out. With this one, I think there's absolutely the element where their relationship began when June was emotional and struggling with the Enchantress, and that emotion made things simpler for a while, but it stopped working once the Enchantress was gone and June could return to her usual studies.
“She said… go back to that sadistic nightmare you spend so much time with, if you really want to fight like this.”
Eris and Rick have always been very close, even when it wasn't romantically-oriented. They were close when he started dating June, and while Rick did try to make June his priority, she still ended up growing incredibly jealous of Eris over time. She just couldn't understand how Rick could be so incredibly in-tune with someone who seems so difficult and violent, when there those things that didn't quite click with him and June (who was calmer, gentler, and in many ways a better - or at least more typical - partner)
But moments like these? Outside the battlefield, the alliances? Put in a place where Eris faltered and failed, where he needed comfort and all she could give him was booze and too-sharp banter, where she couldn’t be what he needed? He was still grateful for her presence?
Again, drawing off that previous point: Eris has lived a very isolated life, and much of their history has given them a skewed self-image. They've spent a lot of time being treated as a dark god, a monster, the embodiment of strife and discord, and they don't even realize the way that's affected their view of themself. Part of the reason emotion is so difficult for him is because he feels like the moment Rick (or anyone else) chooses to slow down and process those emotions, he'll realize Eris is completely and utterly unlovable (not true, of course, but that skewed self-image)
Love. Was that what it was? Either way, Eris had found the head of the sea serpent six feet away from the rest of him.
I haven't decided how many past lovers Eris has had. There's Wisteria in Whatever Keeps You Around, there's this gentleman here, and references that indicate Eris has had many more lovers throughout history, but I haven't chosen a number. It fluctuates, too: sometimes Eris will go centuries between lovers, other times it's only a few years. Every time, though, it's similar to this with Rick: Eris grows irrevocably attached, latches on, even though it usually ends in tragedy. Eris may not love particularly often, but when he does, he loves hard.
Today marks Vestalia, the celebration of Vesta and the home.
Fun fact: Vestalia was historically celebrated during the second week of June. That's not only a reference to June the character, the fic itself was actually posted during Vestalia - June 15th!
"It’s an unlucky day for a home to break.”
You pointed this out, and I love you for it: it's not the breaking of a home, it's the creation of a home. Eris and Rick may not officially get together on that night, since Rick still has some emotional recovery to get through, but it is the night they recognize those feelings and choose each other.
Eris came to celebrate the creation of a home, with no idea that Rick and June had broken up until she arrived, and in the end, they still end up celebrating the creation of a home in that backwards, grief-stricken way.
“You pushed me aside for her, you know.” Eris found himself muttering, “You met her, and you let her wrap you around her little finger like you did with all the rest, and soon she was all you talked about. You told me I was your number one, and yet you closed me out of your home the moment she asked you to. I’d have expected that from someone else, but… I thought you were better than that.”
Eris is hurt here. Genuinely hurt. As I've said, when he loves, he loves hard, and he'd already found that connection with Rick when June came in. Even if they weren't officially together at that point, Eris had trusted Rick to give him a home and a partnership, and those began to trickle away as June became a bigger part of his life. Despite that harsh exterior, Eris does have emotions, and strong ones at that.
"Figured you’d just move on to the next war, or the next guy, or whatever it is that you do.”
Semi-random fact: Eris is pansexual, so it wouldn't necessarily be "the next guy", but historically they've been mostly attracted to soldiers, athletes, and war heroes, those with a lot of muscle and skill in battle - which throughout most of history, was predominantly men. As Rick points out in Whatever Keeps You Around, Eris' "type" is definitely noticeable and typically applies to masculine body types, but that doesn't always mean men.
“I won’t be your rebound.” he muttered, “It can be something or it can be nothing, heart or just sex, but I won’t be your rebound from June. If you want me, I need to know you want me. Not just a body in your bed.”
Eris is used to being treated as a god, for better or worse. Whatever the relationship ends up being, they want to be seen for what they are - they want to be worshipped. Whether it's a committed relationship or a casual friends-with-benefits sort of deal, it has to be with the recognition of Eris for who he is.
“Alright. Then I’ll wait. However long I must.” they said, and stood up from their seat, “Call me when you’re ready.”
Patience!! Because Eris can afford to be patient! As much as they always talk about wanting more time with Rick, they can afford the weeks or months it'll take for him to recover if it means the relationship starts the right way.
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"D-dammit. You're just too good, aren't you? A-always so worried about me. T-the sickly amnesiac. But... that's not all I am." She pulls back the bolt on the rifle. "I have... my duty. I have... my training. A-and now... I have someone to protect."
"I'm sorry... I h-have to..."
Her shoulders stiffen, and the light seems to go out of her eyes. "Japanese Self-Defense Force Anti-monster unit, special asset Nise Jijou, 'Magical girl', will now engage the enemy. Stated goals are to defend Civilians, and kill the Youma."
If Eri's going to hold on, he'll be pulled into the hallway, as Nise kicks his door clean off its hinged, twists to face the Foyer, and opens fire.
"... Huh?"
All Eri could do was... mutter out a single sound, as he looked at the girl change right in front of him. And... that rifle? Was there a rifle in his room he failed to notice?!
He was just that shocked.
"Nise... I don't understand, what... you..."
No words are forming out of his mouth, with the chaos in his mind. Why... why is she talking as if this was the end of everything!? Doctors checking up on her? Scared of going to school?!
... He has lots of questions to ask, but first...
"L-Look, all of that doesn't matter right now! Nise, it's dangerous outside! I don't know what you're going to do, but you're not going to risk your life, especially in a situation like this! So please! Let's sit down, and think of something together!"
Grabbing her hand, the boy held on to her tightly... telling her not to go. And he's NOT letting go of her, no matter what.
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Meet the author!
Thank you for tagging me @special-simp
Author name = Eris/Roy
A = Alignment (what is the authors moral alignment, are they good or evil, are they lawful or chaotic, or are they neutral?
I think I might be lawful evil
B = Buddies (who are the authors friends, are they apart any friend groups or teams?)
I have a bunch of friends online that I love very much. Irl I have only a few people I consider really actual friends
C = Canon (What is the authors role in the writer universe? Fluff writers, angst, etc.?)
I write a bunch of fluffy and maybe crack! Although I've noticed I have a real talent for angst...
D = Description (what does the author look like? Do they wear anything specific? Is there anything about their appearance that is important?)
I’ve got shoulder length thick brown hair, blue/grey eyes (and I wear glasses) and I'm pretty tall
E = exposition (what is the authors backstory? What led to being the person they are now?)
There isn't that much of a backstory I guess. I was just bored one day and downloaded Tumblr and it all went downhill from there-
F = Fandoms (what fandoms are the author apart of?)
Haikyuu, Mha, Bakuten, Sk8 (I'm getting back into JJK now too)
G = Goals (what is the author’s goal? What do they want to achieve in life?)
I want to finally know myslef. I want to be ok and stable.
H = Hate (what kind of things does the author hate, do they hate specific things or people?)
Homophobes, pedos, racists, and anything of the sort are a no! Also tomatos for some reason
I = Inspiration (Where did the idea to become a writer come from?)
Well I started reading a bunch of fics and I've loved writing for a long time. Also I have that want to show off my work to people wich I'm never really able to otherwise
J = Job (does the author work anywhere? Do they have a specific career?)
I do not
K = Kill (how does the author dream of dying? Slowly, quick, in peace, etc.?)
I would rather it be quick and painless or peaceful knowing I'm happy
L = Like (what does the author like to do, what are their hobbies?)
I like to draw, read, and play theater.
M = Mirror (Does the author put parts of themselves into their work? Like self reflecting onto a character?)
Some times I shamelessly put myself into fics but I also put a bunch into characters I relate to a lot
N = Nemesis (does the author have an enemy?)
Myself
O = Original (what is the authors first piece of writing?)
My first fic was a kyouhaba on ao3 called eyes of a god
P = Personality (What is the author like? What kind of person are they? What is their usual mood?)
I would say I’m pretty laid back. I'm def a mom/therapist friend but I can also be very stupid and goofy
Q = Quirk (What is a power/Ability/talent/skill that the author wishes they had?)
I would like to be able to read minds. I could know when to call bullshit
R = Relative (What is the Author’s family like? Are they close with them?)
I would say they’re okay? Me and my dad are basically the same person in diffrent fonts but me and my mom dn't get along to well because she's very controling and other things
S = Secret (What is a secret the author has?)
I don’t think I have any
T = Title (Does the author have a nickname or title their followers call them?)
I get called Fuko! Other than that not really
U = Unique (What is unique about the author? Whether it’s looks or the way they write?)
I don’t think there is anything all that unique about me tbh-
V = Violence (What is the author like in a fight? How do they react to violence?)
I’m not someone who would generally fist fight. I would def beat up a homophobe tho
W = World (Does the author want to have an impact on the world?)
I do but I also don’t. On one hand I want to teach people that we are basically all the same and all this hate has no use on the other hand I'm scared of doing things I don't know and being in the spotlight of everyone
X = XOXO (what is the authors sexuality? Does the author have a relationship/crush on anyone? If so, who? Fictional or Nonfictional.)
I am a omnisexual, polyam, non binary, demigirl! I'm in a relationship with my partner, Zeus. And fictional crushes...I have a bunch of them
Y = You (What is the author’s opinion on themselves?)
I don''t really know. I hate myself one day and then think I'm the hot shit
Z = Zinc (How heathy is the author? Do they go through any training of sorts? If so, how do they train?)
I play Volleyball but I don't eat enough/ eat too much and def don't drink enough
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one more. peculiar. detail. #f15baz #f15i #or #new #f15ex @thedrive @the natinterest @haaretzcom @usairforce @us_stratcom .@israel #wingtwo the u s bought the f15x f15ex as (!)dirtcheap substitute for a role stealthysen sor+missiletruck. ******** against a hightech enemy this f15ex cheapver sion would not be able to carry the airforce ******** and this jet re places really worn down airframes of jets that have verypowerful engines, v ery high structural loads in supersonic flights probably a weak canopy for what they can too ******* ifthe jews want to retain a fleet of f15 t hey shouldve rather modify silent eagle packages on dirtcheap ones ifthe y can ensure readiness induress or get brand new silent eagle s not t he xversion ******** https://www.thedrive.com/the-war-zone/39756/is raels-puzzling-lack-of-new-advanced-f-15-eagle-orders-may-be-because-of-this thebest metaphore to decide this, is not somuch about businessdeal oppo rtunity but about (- given the israeli airforce is a cornerstone guarant ee for its existence / withandor besides the nuclear wing2) about *** ****** can you car race when you must with an old worndown car and sustain the additional cost to maintain a certain level of readiness and rea diness in duress ********** all sorts of airforces can somewhat sustain clunkers and retrofitted clunkers the f15 itself has a very big radar cross section iwouldnot retain it without a silent eagle package and or gam echanging jammers radar and infrared assuming the israeli airforce i s that good and can ensure a fix for the radarcrosssection a n d readiness ******** readiness in d u r e s s ******** something noone but them can know then it could work for tenyears maybe twenty whenthe enemy is s 300 and flying clunkers reminder: airwar is *********** compar ative advantage, parity kills, earlier advantage was speed vs weak radars and lackof computing from arab versions of soviet export junk today it changed hightech is everywhere the game shifted to stealth even flowlow and fast is increasingly ineffective ********** I am Christian KISS BabyAWACS – Raw Independent Sophistication #THINKTANK + #INTEL #HELLHOLE #BLOG https://www.BabyAWACS.c om/ [email protected] PHONE / FAX +493212 611 34 64 Helpful? Pay. Sup port. Donnate. paypal.me/ChristianKiss
one more. peculiar. detail. #f15baz #f15i #or #new #f15ex @thedrive @the natinterest @haaretzcom @usairforce @us_stratcom .@israel #wingtwo the u s bought the f15x f15ex as (!)dirtcheap substitute for a role stealthysen sor+missiletruck. ******** against a hightech enemy this f15ex cheapver sion would not be able to carry the airforce ******** and this jet re places really worn down airframes of jets that have verypowerful engines, v ery high structural loads in supersonic flights probably a weak canopy for what they can too ******* ifthe jews want to retain a fleet of f15 t hey shouldve rather modify silent eagle packages on dirtcheap ones ifthe y can ensure readiness induress or get brand new silent eagle s not t he xversion ******** https://www.thedrive.com/the-war-zone/39756/is raels-puzzling-lack-of-new-advanced-f-15-eagle-orders-may-be-because-of-this thebest metaphore to decide this, is not somuch about businessdeal oppo rtunity but about (- given the israeli airforce is a cornerstone guarant ee for its existence / withandor besides the nuclear wing2) about *** ****** can you car race when you must with an old worndown car and sustain the additional cost to maintain a certain level of readiness and rea diness in duress ********** all sorts of airforces can somewhat sustain clunkers and retrofitted clunkers the f15 itself has a very big radar cross section iwouldnot retain it without a silent eagle package and or gam echanging jammers radar and infrared assuming the israeli airforce i s that good and can ensure a fix for the radarcrosssection a n d readiness ******** readiness in d u r e s s ******** something noone but them can know then it could work for tenyears maybe twenty whenthe enemy is s 300 and flying clunkers reminder: airwar is *********** compar ative advantage, parity kills, earlier advantage was speed vs weak radars and lackof computing from arab versions of soviet export junk today it changed hightech is everywhere the game shifted to stealth even flowlow and fast is increasingly ineffective ********** I am Christian KISS BabyAWACS – Raw Independent Sophistication #THINKTANK + #INTEL #HELLHOLE #BLOG https://www.BabyAWACS.c om/ [email protected] PHONE / FAX +493212 611 34 64 Helpful? Pay. Sup port. Donnate. paypal.me/ChristianKiss
one more. peculiar. detail. #f15baz #f15i #or #new #f15ex @thedrive @thenatinterest @haaretzcom @usairforce @us_stratcom .@israel #wingtwo the us bought the f15x f15ex as (!)dirtcheap substitute for a role stealthysensor+missiletruck. ******** against a hightech enemy this f15ex cheapversion would not be able to carry the airforce ******** and this jet replaces really worn down airframes of jets…
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About Rae
Thanks to @pretty-meekish for making this template! I’ll be doing these for all of the fanmade characters.
Guardians name: Raegalia Drakyx
Age: 6
Race: Paralian
Call signs/alias: Stasis Vanguard Rae
Pronouns: She/Her
Class: Warlock
Preferred subclass(es): Dawnblade and Shadebinder
Ghost's name: Ghost/Little Light
Their Vanguard: Ikora Rey
Fireteam name: Paralight
Fireteam teammates: Blaze, Adam, Marcia, Tif, Crow
Favorite legendary weapon: Misfit
Favorite exotic weapon: Lumina
Favorite exotic armor: Sunbracers
Favorite ornament armor set: Northlight Set
Favorite weapon ornament: Shot Through the Heart (The Vow)
What stats do they focus on: Intellect and Discipline
Are they offense, defense, or support: Offense and support
Do they prefer being close, mid, or long range: Mid and long range
Do they lean more "Element of Surprise" or "Upfront and Aggressive": Element of Surprise
Strikes, Gambit, or Crucible: Strikes and Crucible.
Who was their mentor(if they had one. If it is a character you created, tell us about them!): Ikora Rey
Who are they mentoring(if they are. If it is a character you created, tell us about them!): The Crow
What ship do they have: A plum and gold Talon Blue she nicknamed Skylance
What is their Sparrow: A plum Wayfarer Zero with a gold trim nicknamed Dragon’s Reign
Favorite Ghost shell: Last City Shell
Favorite shader: Amethyst Bloom
Favorite color: Plum/pink
Favorite food: Tonkotsu ramen
Favorite piece of Pre-Collapse tech(if they've seen any): Video game consoles
Favorite Pre-Collapse music(if they've heard any): Video game OSTs
Favorite place in The Last City(if it's a place you created, give a little description!): The Bazaar
Favorite NPC(s): Cayde-6
Favorite patrol location: The Cosmodrome
5 things your Guardian likes(can be anything): - Ghost - The Dawning - Spending time with Cayde - Learning about Paralian history - Going a day without a disaster occurring or her Fireteam giving her a nervous breakdown
Least favorite food: Anything sour
Least favorite shader: Anything neon
Least favorite patrol location: The Moon
Least favorite Pre-Collapse tech(if they've seen any): None
Least favorite NPC(s): The Spider
Least favorite weapon ornament: Lucid Melody (Lumina)
Least favorite ornament armor set: Virtuous Set
Least favorite legendary weapon: Trust
Least favorite exotic weapon: Thorn
Least favorite exotic armor: Verity’s Brow
5 things your Guardian dislikes(this can be anything): - Getting overly stressed - Hive - Not being listened to - Being lied to - Feeling powerless
Your Guardian has to rest. What is their living space like: A fairly neat apartment aside from a few books and report papers scattered across a desk. Overall, very cozy.
Does your Guardian have any casual wear?(Y'all remember Polyvore? The website URSTYLE works very similar if that helps!):
What hobbies and/or skills does you Guardian have: Sketching
What would your Guardian's lore book be called: Walking the Line
Where was your Guardian reborn?(If you created the location, give us a little description!): The Cosmodrome
What were they wearing when they were reborn: Brown and gold robes with matching boots and metal plating
What was their reaction to being reborn: Confusion with a bit of fear
What was their reaction to their first rez: Confusion has been doubled but with an odd sense of relief
After being reborn, did they meet friendlies first or hostiles: Technically friendlies since she met Ghost first. But after that she encountered Fallen, so hostiles.
Who was the first other Guardian they met?(Same thing! If you made them, give a little description!): Cayde-6. He helped her up after she tripped down the stairs when first entering the Hall of Guardians.
Did your Guardian get reborn with, or find, any indication of their past life? If so what do they have/found: She had a journal written in strange glyphs except for the last page which was in English and briefly described who she was and what she was doing before her death
How did your Guardian get their name(if they didn't rez with past life momentos): Her name was engraved on the front of her journal: Raegalia Drakyx. She came up with Rae as a nickname
Going back to your Guardian's lore book, what would be some some quotes or passages from their book: “I find myself constantly thinking about this one line I tend to hear over and over. I first heard it from Uldren. ‘The line between Light and Dark is so very thin’. He asked me what side I was on. I finally have an answer now. I walk that line.”
Does your Guardian have a significant other: Cayde-6
Did your Guardian go explore first before going to The Last City? If so, where to: Nope. She and Ghost found a jumpship and went straight to the city
What was their reaction to first seeing The Last City: Awestruck. She thought the City was the most beautiful place she had ever seen
Is your Guardian a part of a clan: No
If your Guardian would have a quote as a flavor text for a weapon and/or piece of armor, what would they be: “Don’t view your power as a means of destruction. See it as a means of preserving life.”
If your Guardian has had any interactions with any civilians (The Last City/The Farm), Eliksni, Cabal, Vex, Hive, Taken, Scorn, Rouge Lightbearers, or Iron Lords/War Lords(if your Guardian is an Old Light) tell us about it!: Her first strange interaction was with Marcia in the Cosmodrome while prepping to enter the Black Garden. Back then, Marcia ran a group of rogue Lightbearers called the Umbrialyx and a few of them had been causing trouble for other Guardians. Marcia was the first rogue lightbearer Rae had ever met.
Does your Guardian have any unconventional allies or connections(By Vanguard standards): Rae and Fireteam Paralight are allies with the House of Light after she saved Mithrax from a Hive Knight on Titan and then met Tif, a human Titan who was also a Captain of House Light, a few years later when helping them secure a generator
How does your Guardian feel about themselves or others using Stasis: Rae understands the risks of using Stasis, which is why she suggested to Zavala that instead of outlawing Stasis, have her teach Guardians how to use it properly without risking corruption
Did they run The Last Wish raid? How did they react to seeing a live Ahamkara a.k.a Riven: Awe. She had heard of them beforehand and now to see one in person, she almost didn’t want to kill it.
Did they run The Deep Stone Crypt raid? How did they react to the Crypt and seeing Exo Eliskni: Disappointment. She had really hoped that no one would continue Clovis’s awful experiments. Seeing the Exo Eliksni just made her hate the House of Salvation even more.
Is your Guardian from D1? How did they react to seeing Taniks alive once again: Here’s a direct quote! “....TRAVELLER....D A M N I T ! ! !”
Where did they go and what did they do during The Red War: Rae fell from Ghaul’s ship after losing her Light, gaining the scar over her eye in the process. A few months later, she regained her Light via the shard of the Traveler and led the revolt against Ghaul after reuniting the Vanguard.
Here are some characters that are either polarizing or have created a strong enough mass emotion within the community. What opinion does your Guardian hold on each of them(These are only a handful of characters!)>>>
Osiris, First Warlock Vanguard, originally exiled: Rae looks up to Osiris and admires his dedication to his work and beliefs. She definitely sees the similarities between him and Ikora. Despite the light ribbing she tends to give him (he calls him grumpy Tower grandpa), she respects him. Though she does wish he would ask Saint on a date already. “You broke time to save him, for Traveler’s sake, at least bring him out for dinner!”
Eris Morn, Bane of the Swarm: The first person she met when she arrived in the Tower. Rae respects Eris’s wisdom and knowledge as well as her determination. Though Rae does wish she’d tone down the Vanguard roasts a bit (her self-confidence is bad enough as it is).
Cayde-6, Sixth Hunter Vanguard: Rae loves Cayde with every ounce of her being and more. She’s had a crush on him since working with him during Oryx’s invasion but never acted upon it, despite her teammates constant teasing. Seeing him die in front of her tore her apart. Thankfully she able to save him thanks to her Paralian heritage, and confessed to him after she returned from the Reef. The two have been near inseparable since. Cayde’s nickname for her in Sunrae while her nickname for him is Wildcard.
Ikora Rey, Second Warlock Vanguard: Rae looks up to Ikora the most. She’s trained under Ikora since she was a Kinderguardian and has flourished since. A lot of Guardians who know Rae say she is a mini-Ikora, from her witty comebacks, to her terrifying demeanor when angered.
Commander Zavala, Second Titan Vanguard: Rae respects Zavala as a fellow Vanguard, commander, and friend, but she’s not shy to speak up if she feels that something isn’t right...or to go behind his back to do an unorthodox mission.
Saint-14, legendary Titan, First Titan Vanguard: If Osiris is the grumpy grandpa, Saint’s the fun grandpa. Rae enjoys Saint’s company and finds he brings an air of liveliness to the Tower since his return.
Lord Saladin, Iron Banner handler, One of the last remaining Iron Lords: Rae respects Saladin but wishes that, while she agrees it isn’t always the answer, he would give diplomacy a chance instead of assuming every enemy has to be killed.
Lord Shaxx, Crucible handler, Hero of Twilight Gap, living megaphone: Like Saint, Rae enjoys Shaxx’s company and hearing stories of Ikora’s Crucible days. Rae frequents the Crucible in hopes of one day beating Ikora’s kill streak record and Shaxx supports her endeavors (when Ikora isn’t listening of course). Though he does have a bet with Cayde as to who’d win in a 1v1 fight. Shaxx’s glimmer is on Ikora but only because Cayde already called dibs on Rae.
The Crow, New Light, Ex-Enforcer to The Spider: Despite the initial shock of seeing him again, Rae quickly warmed up to Crow and began helping him train his Light. She was more than happy to hear that he wanted to be a Guardian. He honestly reminded her of her Kinderguardian self: unsure, curious, and wanting to help.
The Spider, The Shore's Only Law, founder of "House" Spider: Rae trust’s Spider less than Drifter, and that’s saying something! She was wary of him during her first visit to the Tangled Shore, but after finding out what he did to Glint to keep Crow in the Reef, she was ready to risk the consequences and go ham on him. Rae is usually quite patient but Spider has tested those limits too many times.
Uldren Sov, Prince of the Reef, Master of Crows: Rae and Uldren didn’t like each other at all from the moment they met. But after Blaze regained the memories of her past life with Uldren, they agreed to tolerate each other for her sake. When he killed Cayde, Rae was ready to go to war with the Reef. She wanted to be the one to end him so badly but when he requested Blaze be the last one he saw, she put her hatred aside to grant his request, allowing Blaze to be the one to end him.
Mara Sov, Queen of the Reef, Queen of the Awoken, Ex-Kell of Wolves: Rae has mixed feelings about Mara. She has a certain level of respect for the Awoken queen but doesn’t agree with most of her ruling methods and, while she’ll never say it aloud, Rae sees her as a coward.
Variks, the Loyal, founder of House Judgement: When Variks isn’t trying to get his hands on Ghost or her ship, Rae respects Variks. While she does recognise that Variks had a hand in the Prison of Elders incident, she doesn’t hold him directly accountable for Cayde’s death.
Mithrax, the Forsaken, Kell of Light, founder of House Light: Rae views Mithrax as a powerful ally and friend. They have a mutual respect for each other and have helped each other on a couple of occasions.
The Exo Stranger/Elizabeth "Elsie" Bray, Granddaughter of Clovis I and Sister to Ana Bray: While Rae doesn’t know much about Elsie, she does trust her. She was the one who pointed Rae and her Fireteam towards the Black Garden and thus put them on their path to becoming one of the most well-known Fireteams in the Tower. Elsie was also the one who helped teach Rae how to use Stasis.
Eramis, of House Salvation, Kell of Darkness: Rae initially wanted to resolve the conflict with House Salvation peacefully but Eramis proved unwilling to listen and was the first to actually break the limit on Rae’s patience, the latter killing Eramis with no mercy.
Empress Caiatl of the Cabal Imperial Empire: While she finds Caiatl aggravating with her views and methods of ruling, Rae is relieved that she’s not as creepy as her father.
Taniks the Scarred, the Perfected, the Abomination, the Shadow Thief: “DIE ALREADY!!!”
The Darkness is fast approaching. How is your Guardian handling it: Rae is becoming more anxious about the Darkness’s arrival and is having self-doubts, but is keeping a brave face for everyone else’s sake.
And finally, does your Guardian have any advice for any New Lights: Be yourself, do what you think is right, and never give up!
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I DEMAND THAT YOU EXPLAIN EZRA'S FALLEN RIGHT NOW }:<
//: I know god damned well that you were pleased with yourself when Tumblr thanked you for submitting this ask...
I don’t want to go too deep into this right now because I have a post coming up about them as a whole but in short to know Ezra’s Fallen is to know the following basics:
The House is called The House of Dread. - The Banner is comprised of that of Wolf House in the colours of Black, Silver and Blood. The Backdrop of the Banner is black, the Wolf sigil is silver but overlaying it is the outlining of an Elk skull with broken antlers in smeared blood *this portion of the Banner is actually made of ‘white’ burlap cut out to allow the underlying back drop to shine through. The burlap is frayed, stained with old blood (though it’s not expressly stated where the blood is from).
Ezra is called The Dread Kell O R Chainbreaker - She very well could challenge Skolas and now Eramis in later threads and lore for the title of Kell of Kells. Her ‘House’ is a hodgepodge, a ragbag assortment of outcast, exiled and defected Fallen - IE those who are absolutely tired of the war between the Fallen and Guardians/The City. Eliksni who would be considered weak by their brethrens terms, those who are malformed, old, different or other wise unacceptable for a normal House setting... - Ezra does not call herself Kell, but allows her Fallen to do so to give them a sense of ‘normalcy.’ - Commonly she is called by Hatiaskis, the name given to her by Skolas. Given that Skolas is based on Skoll the one who Mocks (the wolf who seeks to devour the Sun - I personally think they did this because the Sun is akin to the Traveler as it brings Light) I combined Hati - the One who Hates and a dyslexic spelling of Aksis (I kept an aspect of a thread from my old blog where Ezra was Aksis’s adoptive mother and well, that’s how he gets his name, the ass end of her Fallen Name....)
Her Fallen number around a hundred and eighty (give or take) - The House started with Eight individuals but slowly grew at the rate of one or two individuals over the first few years, only until the scattering of Wolf House did her numbers rise sharply, seeing the immediate addition of around a hundred and ten (again, give or take) Wolves and members from other Houses the Wolves had absorbed. Most of these refuted Mara Sov and when the Queen of the Reef sent Ezra back to Earth these few followed her.
The House of Devils is a vehemently H A T E D neighbor and enemy. It’s exceedingly rare that she allows a Devil to join her fold, the current exception to this is Aksis. His parents and their splinter band were caught trekking through Ezra’s forest back to the out post lair outside the forest and lake area’s boarders. Thinking to appease and distract her, they threw the new born whelp at her feet and fled, even with a child strapped to her chest her Wolves and herself caught up with them and subsequently slaughtered them all. Ezra, for all the monstrous things she’s done and been known to do, refuses to kill any child - no matter the race, species etc. So she raises him as her son, at the age of twenty three years he leaves her to take control of the Devils, only to become corrupted by SIVA and be reborn as Aksis Prime. When she finds this out through intercepted Tower transmissions she disguises herself and joins a fireteam to see for herself, when she sees it’s true she reveals who she really is and kills the team. For several months she works to defend her son while attempting to figure out how to save him and when finally faced with the reality that he can not be saved, she kills him herself and goes on a four day rampage to try and slaughter the ‘Perfected Devils’.
Oops I went off on a tangent lol, enjoy this little bit for now, I return to work tomorrow so I’ll have to look at my schedule and figure out when and where to allot time for this place xD
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Digimon Adventures ~ x Kagerou Project “ Headphone Actor ” FULL VERSION / PREVIEW AMV [music (C) Jin, singer: IA / Vocaloid] (Kagepros [subbed] video: watch here!) featuring DUO/SHIP: Taichi Yagami [“Tai Kamiya”] x Koushiro(u) Izumi [“Izzy Izumi”] [Taishiro(u)]
PAST AMVS / VIDEO EDITS IN THIS SERIES: Kagerou Daze (Heat-Haze Daze) / Children Record [+Adv Chosen] / RED / Additional Memory and Imaginary Reload music edits for KageDaze / Days (short edit) / Lost Time Memory / Yesterday Evening / Summertime Record / Shounen Brave [+Jou] / Outer Science [+Villains] / Headphone Actor (short edit) / DAZE (short version / TV Size OP) / KOUSHIROS ? CYBER JOURNEY [+Maki] / Brave Heart x Kaien Panzermast [+Chosen Children] / Night Tales Deceive [Yobanashi Deceive] / [KOUSHIRO’S] Imaginary World / Mekakushi Code [Blindfold Code] [+Yamato&Sora&Adv Chosen] / Ultramarine Rain [+Mrs Yoshie Izumi; Izumis] / Imagination Forest [+Mimi&Jou] / Transparent Answer [TaiKou+Meiko] / Jinzou Enemy [Artificial Enemy] / DEAD and SEEK (short edit) REPEATVERSE/EXTENDED STORY INTRODUCTION: HERE ( *note: extended summary contains some spoilers for the fic ) [ however, it also explains the worldbuilding involved and plot setup ! ] (* It’s ok to start on/only watch this current AMV!) [*You may understand the story/implied timeline of things better if you begin from my “Kagerou Daze” AMV, though it’s also not required! “Children Record” is also recommended as a starting point/upbeat song!] {NOTE : PLEASE read my FAQ and “about” sections BEFORE interacting directly with me, my contents / fanworks / this series, or my blog!!}
part of my Taishiro [Taichi x Koushiro] REPEAT?_ ficverse (please note any and all notes/trigger warnings for said ficverse!!) [seriously, please note the warnings, the plot is kinda heavy] (please note any and all warnings for Kagepro’s plot too if you look into that!!) - no, it’s NOT a direct parody (but v[ERY] inspired) (if you can’t tell) - watching it in HIGH(ER) QUALITY at the original Youtube link is encouraged! - to do so, go to the original youtube link, click “HD” button, then “ 1080p ” !
LYRICS PREVIEW: (if you click the ‘lyrics’ link and ‘English translation’ tab on that Wiki, full lyrics there as well!):
It was an EXTREMELY AVERAGE D A Y , Without a SINGLE OBSTACLE in MY PATH UNTIL I WAS BORED, listening to the “radio”, ...
- short version of implied story/plot of this series: T I M E L O O P S - Tri is here because … ah … … - let’s just say it’s probably AT LEAST ONE part of the “start” of it all ah - KOUSHIRO IZUMI VOICE : ( ‘ W H Y ’ ) - DO THEY MAKE IT TO THE END - @ TAICHI & KOUSHIRO, ARE YOU SURE YOU /WANT/ TO ——-
- TBH HOW MUCH do KOUSHIRO or TAICHI even REALLY REMEMBER - MUCH LESS THE REST OF THEM - who even knows after a certain point anymore - timeloops are fun !! ! ! ( this particular AMV also explains SOME of it … )
Spoiler warnings for Tri scenes used + Further notes/warnings & LYRICS under ‘read more’!
LYRICS PREVIEW: (if you click the ‘lyrics’ link and ‘English translation’ tab on that Wiki, full lyrics there as well!):
It was an EXTREMELY AVERAGE D A Y , Without a single obstacle in MY PATH UNTIL I WAS BORED , listening to the radio, AND I HEARD THIS SAID: “ It’s VERY UNFORTUNATE I have to say this , BUT THE WORLD is going to END TODAY . ” SO SAID SOME “COUNTRY”’S PRESIDENT , IN TEARS as HE SPOKE … .
[ Note: commenting/tagging respectfully/positively is ok ! ]
* THIS AMV IS A P R E V I E W. TECHNICALLY, IT IS INCOMPLETE, AMV. MAY CONTAIN GLITCHINGS, ETC. I am aware of glitches / scenes that cut in too quickly and will fix them as I have time in the future.
{ DIGIADVS SPOILERS WARNING: a) some Tri!Taichi and Tri!Koushiro solo shots from: Saikai, Kokuhaku, Kyousei, BOKURA NO MIRAI / OUR FUTURE. b) some PRETTY spoilery scenes regarding what “Gennai” in Tri was doing c) HOWEVER, the ending of BNM past those scenes is not heavily spoiled d) a couple very quick/brief scenes w/Taichi and Koushiro from DigiAdv 2020, mainly 01 ~ 03 * (as well as scenery shots in general)
- TRIGGER WARNINGS for this song: – general mentions of death [/PSUEDO-deaths] + destruction of “ the world ” – general creepiness abound – ( it’s NOT as you think HERE but IT’S STILL A CREEPY SONG … ) – it makes so much more sense if you actually know K@gepros’ canon – which is wayyyyy too HARD to explain here in full – I’m sorry – I don’t think my version is nearly like K@gepros DESPITE this so … .
FULL LYRICS:
[ Verse 1 ]
Out the windows was a huge flock of birds, Congesting to cover up the sky
Swallowing up the crescent moon ,
Headed some unknown direction.
I had A HALF-FINISHED GAME with NO SAVE ; A scarcely-touched textbook lay on my desk
AND TO STOP MY BODY FROM T R E M B L I N G , I promptly PUT ON MY H E A D P H O N E S .
[ Interlude Verse ]
Just as I was listening to AN OBSCURE ARTIST , A number they did with AN UNKNOWN TITLE ,
Just as it came to my ears , I H E A R D :
" You WANT TO S U R V I V E ‘ Y E S ’ ? "
[ CHORUS 1 ]
Waving over the wriggling world, The skyscrapers seemed TO TREMBLE THIS VOICE seemed UNMISTAKABLE :
IT WAS MY OWN ,
... WHICH I WAS TIRED OF HEARING .
" If you CROSS THAT HILL , then in 20 SECONDS , YOU’LL KNOW WHAT I MEAN , for BETTER or WORSE ”
Don't DOUBT , JUST L I S T E N CLOSE :
GO 2 0 S E C O N D S A H E A D . . . "
[ Verse 2 ]
The intersection was CROWDED , of course ; Man, woman, CHILD , IT DIDN’T MATTER
I WAS BURIED under PEOPLE YELLING and babies' cries . . .
[ Interlude Verse 1 ]
PEOPLE CRYING , a SOBBING GIRL ,
A P R I E S T P R A Y I N G , I PASSED THEM ALL BY .
One SINGLE PERSON headed the OTHER WAY ,
Towards what was BEYOND THAT HILL .
[ Interlude Verse 2 ]
The voice from THE H E A D P H O N E S PERSISTED:
" TWELVE minutes left , " it told me
If EVERYTHING was going to UP AND VANISH ,
Then I had NO OTHER WAY . . .
[ Chorus 2 ]
The chorus of shrieks and screams
Turned to TEARFUL EYES in TEN SECONDS
I had my DOUBTS , but no matter WHO DID WHAT ,
There was NO ENDING HUMANITY’S SONG .
" RUN , RUN , there's 1 MINUTE LEFT , "
But I couldn't even hear it by then;
THE HILL which I thought to cross
Was
RIGHT BEFORE ME .
[ Interlude Verse ]
MY BREATH FAINT , I FINALLY A R R I V E D ,
Before A WALL which projected THE SKY .
Behind it , scientists in white applauded ;
" MAGNIFICENT , " they SAID -----
Doubt
[ FINAL CHORUS ]
FROM THERE , I saw THE TOWN
Was some kind of experimental facility;
" NO LONGER NECESSARY , "
A SCIENTIST said, and calmly tossed a B O M B
I WAS TOLD I HAD BEEN LIVING
MY WHOLE LIFE IN A LITTLE WORLD IN A BOX
So I COULD ONLY STARE , D U M B F O U N D E D
At the BURNT WRECKAGE that had been THE TOWN .
And from THE HEADPHONES at MY EAR,
I heard a faint
" S O R R Y " . . .
NOTE:
- You can tell exactly where I ran out of ideas (towards the end) OTL - I DO PLAN TO FINISH THIS AMV PROPERLY SOMEDAY - I’M SORRY - THOUGH - OK BUT SERIOUSLY PLS I WANT TO TALK ABOUT TRI & ADVS LORE
#koutai#REPEAT TAISHIRO#REPEAT TRI TAICHI#REPEAT TRI TAISHIRO#REPEAT TRI KOUSHIRO#REPEAT ADV KOUSHIRO#REPEAT ADV TAISHIRO#REPEAT ADV TAICHI#REPEAT NOT GENNAI#REPEAT GENNAI#izzyizumi amvs#izzyizumi posts#amv: headphone actor#taichi x koushiro#izumi koushirou#(wOW I'VE BEEN WANTING TO DO THIS ONE BARELY STARTED SINCE WRITING THE FIC)#(BUT ummmm yEAH FAST SONGS and I DIDN'T HAVE ENOUGH FOOTAGE)#(I STILL DON'T HAVE ENOUGH TO DO WHAT I WANT WITH IT I THINK)#(OK BUT MAYBE ONCE WE GET THOSE NEXT FEW DIGIADV 2020 EPS IF JUDGING BY THESE SUMMARY PREVIEWS)#(SERIOUSLY CAN SOMEONE PLS JUST TALK TO ME ABOUT ADVS LORE AND THE CANON TIMELINE AND TRI)#(look I LOVE my ships but I AM ALSO HERE FOR THE LORE. L O R E. I'M HERE FOR IT)#(DIGIADVS LORE IS AWESOME)#(NO I AM NOT ACCEPTING CRITICISMS)#(seriously though THE CANON IS COOL AND I WANT TO TALK ABOUT EVERYTHING THAT'S EVER CAUGHT MY ATTENTION RE LORE)#(YES THIS INCLUDES TRI LORE AND CONNECTING RELEVANT THINGS FROM KAKUDOUS NOVELS)#(this video is ALSO AKA ' PLEASE LEAVE TRI TAICHI ALONE ' i mean no sERIOUSLY LIKE. PLEASE. Please)#(like. it'd be cool if we could actually TALK about TRI TAICHIS VERY OBVIOUS SIGNS OF PTSD AND ANXIETY AND TRAUMA b u t This Fandom)#(ok but yeah I still don't have enough for the fast parts BUT this is basically the Feel the AMV is Supposed To Have Anyhow aND YEA THE END)#(BY THE WAY YES THOSE BITS WITH. OIKAWA. AND. 02 GENNAI LORE TOWARDS THE END ARE INTENTIONAL CAN WE DISCUSS GENNAI)#(IDEK MAN I THINK IT'S PRETTY RELEVANT A 'SOMEONE' THAT TRANSITIONS INTO 02 GENNAI JUST UPS AND OVERWRITES INFO '3 YEARS AGO')
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BABE I'm a rock machine / V for victory BILLY KARLOFF BAND THE MANIAC LP BRAM TCHAIKOVSKY Let's Dance / Rock And Roll Cabaret CICHLIDS BE TRUE TO YOUR SCHOOL LP CRYERS S/T LP DORIS D AND THE PINS Starting at the end / If only ELVIS BROTHERS ADVENTURE TIME LP GANGSTERS S/T LP GROW-UP THE BEST THING LP HARPO Yes I do / I'm a cadillac HEROES Some kind of women / Wild Eyes INTESTINES Life In A Cardboard Box / New Recruit / Anyway JACKSON BROWNE Somebody's Baby / The Crow On The Cradle JOHNNY PALERMO Silly old songs / Make it allright JOSY I Know / Gimme More KASUALS Ebony Eyes / Young Girls KEYS Just a camera / It ain't so LAUGHING APPLE Participate ! / Wouldn't you ? LUV' Welcome To My Party / No Cure No Pay MENACE Last year's youth / Carry no brain MOONDOGS Who's gonna tell mary ? / Overcaring parents NOTSENSIBLES I'm in love with Margaret Thatcher / Little Boxes / Gary Bushells OLIVER DAY Crazy Love / Let The Music PAUL BRADY Crazy Dreams / Something In The Atmosphere PHIL SEYMOUR Precious to me / Baby it's you PURPLE HEARTS Millions like us / Beat that QUESTION Getting Through / The Right Track / Daddy Rolling Stone QUESTION ? Distance Apart / Stare You Down / Easy RADIATORS FROM SPACE Enemies / Psychotic reaction RADIATORS FROM SPACE Television screen / Love detective RAMONES Rock'n'roll high school / Danny says REBEL Baby, Baby, Baby / No use crying ROLLERS Turn on the radio / Washington's birthday RONNIE SPECTOR Darlin' / Dynamite ROUSERS Rock'n roll or run / Get out of my show SANDY Bright lights / So hard to say goodbye SCARS Adult/ery / Horrorshow SILVER CONVENTION Telegram / Midnight lady SUBURBAN STUDS No faith / Questions TEENS New York / Rock 'N' Roll Is Just A State Of Mind TEENS 1-2-3-4 Red Light / Baby Blue TEENS Gimme Gimme Gimme Gimme Gimme Your Love / Rollerball THIN LIZZY The Rocker / Here I Go Again WAVES Brown eyed son / She loves to groove WELTONS Sweet rock'n' roller / Too much champagne WRECKLESS ERIC Hit And Miss Judy / Let's Go To The Pictures
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For the BnHA questions: all of them?
oh fuck this is so many dude,, okay
~ B A S I C S ~
1: What part of the anime/manga piqued your interest? i started watching it a year ago actually and stopped after episode 4 for some reason... but i think what got me wanting to actually see where it was going was a scene of the sports festival i saw in gifs. specifically deku yelling at todoroki.
2: Did you think Midoriya would be a good protagonist in the first few chapters/episodes? i loved deku from the moment i saw him
3: How do you think Midoriya’s conflict with Bakugou will end? i actually have never thought about this but i feel like it’ll be both bittersweet and comforting for both of them, in a way
4: What was your first reaction to Bakugou’s treatment towards Midoriya? “whos this jackass and why is he so mean to my son ill kill him”
5: What do you think of All-Might as a hero? I LOVE HIM SO MUCH HE IS THE BES T
6: Do you think that Midoriya deserved to get OFA? yes. absolutly.
7: Aside from Midoriya, which character in the series do you think has had the most character development? todoroki
8: Favorite unpopular character? there are really only 2 unpopular characters in bnha and neither of them are my favorites
9: Favorite overall character? BAKUGOU KATSUKI
10: Do you have any OC’s? Describe them! If you don’t, create one on the spot. yes i do her name is akarui fuurashu and her quirk allows her to flash bright lights from her fingers that temporally blind her enemies (and anyone looking at the flash). her hero name is Flashbang
~ S H I P S ~
Pink: What are your main/favorite ships? im a huge kacchako bakugou/uraraka stan, but coming in close second is tododeku. i also super otp kirishima/bakugou/uraraka and kirishima/deku/todoroki
Blue: Do you have any NOTPs? im not a fan of baku//deku or todo//momo at all.
Yellow: Favorite fanfiction about your OTP? Downplay It (Kacchako) and Prince & Prince (TodoDeku) both stole my heart and ruined my sleep schedule
Green: Any preferred rarepairs? kirishima/uraraka, uraraka/momo, shinsou/deku
Purple: Do you have any works centered around your OTP? ive drawn a lot of kacchako since getting into it, and im currently in the works of several kacchako/tododeku fics right now
Orange: Fluff or Angst? why not both
Red: What do you like the most about your favorite ship? its the classic bad boy/good girl, “jerk” and “goody-two-shoes” trope that i eat up all the time, also their dynamic is so good i could talk about them for hours. also theyre just really cute together...
Turqoise: What do you hate about your favorite ship? how much hate it gets lol
Lavender: Does your ship get a lot of hate? If so, why? because it’s a “straight” ship, because people think bakugou is abusive and would be awful to her, just a lot of dumb bullshit
Grey: Realistically speaking, will your ship ever become canon? probably not since it’s pretty obvious uraraka is dekus love interest but i can fucking hope and dream all i want
~ T H E O R I E S ~
Pop: Do you think the “Dabi and Shouto are brothers” theory is true? i am so behind this theory ive screamed about this to all of my friends who would listen
Indie: Opinions on the Traitor Kaminari theory? the what
Punk: Opinions on the Traitor Kirishima theory? I HAVNT SEEN ANYTHING OF THIS BUT HOW DARE YOU SPEAK OF MY SON AS IF HES DONE SOMETHING WRONG KIRISHIMA EIJIROU IS A GOOD BOY AND I WOULD DIE FOR HIM
Rock: What do you think of the “The doctor from Midoriya’s childhood is affiliated with the League Of Villains” theory? (in reference to this post) HE WAHT?? HI I HAVNT CAUGHT UP WITH THE WHOLE MANGA YEt WHAT THE FUC
Jazz: What do you think will happen now that Eri has been saved? good but also i dont know who that is yet i havnt read the whole manga... i mean i know thats the little girl with the horn but???
~ S T U D E N T S ~
11: Dekusquad or Bakusquad? i cant decide because i love them both but i have more faves in the deku squad than i do in the bakusquad... BUT my ULTIMATE fave is the leader of the bakusquad... BUT...
12: Most underrated student? kendou!!!!!!
13: Dadmight or Dadzawa? dadmight
14: Whose quirk do you think is the most unique? shinsou’s
15: Aside from Midoriya, who do you think has the most potential to be #1 Hero? todoroki
16: Should Mineta be replaced by Shinsou in the hero class? i think shinsou should BE in the hero class but i don’t think he should take mineta’s spot, purly because i dont hate mineta. hes a 15 year old boy that looks like a grape calm down
17: Favorite student(s) outside of Class 1-A? bakugou, uraraka, kirishima, deku, todoroki, and momo
18: Any HCs for the entirety of Class 1-A? the girls have lots of sleepovers, usually at momo’s house because its huge. the first time todoroki gets a confession letter he gets so nervous he sets it on fire and the other guys freak out because they wanted to know. kirishima brings in festive treats for everyone around holidays.
19: Do you remember their seating arrangement by heart? no but i think deku sits behind bakugou
20: Which of the students do you think has the most potential to become a villain? don’t ever speak to me or any of my children ever again
~ V I L L A I N S ~
Techno: Favorite villain? shigaraki or maybe dabi
Classical: Eight Precepts of Death or League of Villains? i havnt read the manga far enough to know how to answer this
Metal: Which villain’s quirk would you want for yourself? u know how cool it’d be to kill people just by touching them w your whole hand.....shigaraki dude
Soul: Shigaraki or Chisaki? shigaraki but im biased bc i havnt officially met overhaul yet
Alternative: Most obnoxious villain? oh shigaraki without a doubt he’s a tool i love him
~ M I S C ~
Apple: Favorite popular HC? that kirishima is gay
Strawberry: Who is your favorite pro-hero? all might
Banana: Which of the pro-heroes’ quirks fascinates you the most? present mic... he just ufcking screams
Cherry: Should Endeavor die like right now yeah
Pear: What was your reaction to Todoroki’s backstory? tears... real, pained tears, and anger
Kiwi: Should the BNHA girls get more spotlight/recognition? WHAT THE HELL OF COURSE THEY SHOULD SPECIFICALLY URARAKA WHERE SHES NOT SPOTLIGHTED AS THE LOVE INTEREST
Pineapple: What do you like the most about BNHA, as a whole? how easy it is to get attached to the characters
Watermelon: Dub or Sub? sub definitely... the dub almost made me put off watching it again
Coconut: How do you think Hokiroshi is doing, in terms of the plot? incredible. teach me how to do that.
Blueberry: What makes BNHA unique from all the other shonen animes/mangas out there? i wanna say character design tbh... you think fuckin kishimoto or isayama could put a character like shouji in their series and it still be cool? no
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Chapter 10/24: Breakdown
✗ TECHNICAL DETAILS
FANDOM: Marvel’s MCU SERIES: SEADLA Verse, version 2.0 RATING: Mature WORDCOUNT: 4 626 PAIRING(S): - CHARACTER(S): Tony Stark, Nick Fury, Bruce Banner, Steve Rogers, Tony’s therapist and the rest of the avengers in the background. GENRE: Plot twist. TRIGGER WARNING(S): Mentions of suicide and generally low self esteem (Check the AO3 listing for a glimpse of what’s to come). SUMMARY: In which things are revealed, and none of them are pleasant. Also, Tony may or may not make Steve cry, but it’s not like he cares.
DEDICATION(S): As always, to the first version’s readers, to the people who leave comments on the fic three years after its last update, and to 2012!me, who needed to write this fic a lot.
SEADLA ON TUMBLR: [Chapter 1] [Chapter 2] [Chapter 3] [Chapter 4] [Chapter 5] [Chapter 6] [Chapter 7] [Chapter 8] [Chapter 9]
Tony stares at the therapist—is the guy even a real professional, or was he just acting?—until the world starts swimming, his ears buzzing with the same white noise that deafened him after his jeep blew up on an unnamed desert road. He watches the room swim in a strange kind of slow tango, arc reactor desperately trying to split his chest open even as he tries to make sense of Steve’s wide eyes and pale face. He fucked up—he fucked up and he’s screwed, and the thought of it is almost enough to pull him to his knees.
He reaches for Lorna’s—Loki’s, it’s Loki’s—knife in his pocket and clenches his fingers around the handle hard enough to hurt while he tries to breathe the storm out of his lung, the blankness out of his brain.
He hasn’t told anyone about Loki—not Pepper, who’s seen him through more shit than she should have had to, not Rhodey, who’s undoubtedly going to kill him for the omission, and with good reasons to boot. The only moment Tony even used the name—ha. He really should have guessed, shouldn’t he? Kebradalvin’s presence should have been a dead giveaway! Oh, how stupid can he get?
Months. Months of therapy, of spilling his guts out to a stranger because he thought it’d be safer than trust any of his friends with the mess of him and now—this? Well fucking done, Tony, way to prove you’re actually the idiot you thought you were.
“You said you weren’t keeping tabs on us anymore,” Bruce says from his seat at the very edge of the kitchen.
His voice is full of the same quiet challenge he’s used to coax more than one arrogant dick think of their following words with a lot of carefulness. On the side, Fury gives Bruce a wary side-eye, and Tony wants them both to shut up—to slip into silence and leave what’s left of his world alone. Hell, he’s just about ready to start praying right now—indulge the wobbliness of his knees and call for whoever happens to hear to come and get him out of this nightmare—but Fury steals the rug from under him when he says:
“We at S.H.I.E.L.D came to the conclusion that Iron Man’s safety required special monitoring.”
Tony manages to brace himself on the wall before he actually falls, but it’s a close call—and it doesn’t even really matter anyway. The room blinds him with its harsh lights, overexposed and burning at his eyes harder than the lamps thrown into his face in a darkened cave until he has to swallow against the sudden urge to vomit.
Four months—four months of his life—the thought seizes at his throat, his stomach, his chest, presses at him until he has to gasp around it, drowning in all the things he should never have said, never have confided, and he can’t make himself stop, can’t get air—
“Can’t breathe,” he gasps through sheer miracle, sliding halfway to the floor before Bruce springs out of his chair and stabilizes him, leaving Steve to try and open Tony’s collar.
Tony, meanwhile, can’t—won’t—look anywhere, at anything but Bruce—Bruce, and the way his eyes look like they’re trying to catch Tony and not let him go. Bruce, whose voice is steady and solid when he tells Tony to breath—come on, Tony, in through the nose, out through the mouth, we’ll get there.
It hurts—breathing hurts, looking hurts—but Tony wrestles himself back into some semblance of control, forces his lungs through one, two, three cycles of controlled breathing before he stops feeling like he’s about to have an out of body experience. The whole of him screams, like an exposed nerve rubbed raw, and a small part of his brain wonders if Bruce, who first used the metaphor, feels half that terrified when he hulks out.
If yes, tony is never asking the Big Guy to come out again.
“I have trouble believing you did this for Tony’s sake,” Bruce says after Tony calms down a little, the evenness of his tone keeping Tony anchored there.
Steve’s fingers hurt where they dig into his biceps. Clint and Natasha haven’t made a move either way.
“You don’t have to believe it,” Fury replies with a slight shrug.
Tony grips at Bruce’s shoulder as tight as he holds Loki’s knife, and wishes one or two Norse gods would crash through the ceiling right now. They don’t, though, and so he clings to the tremors of anger in Bruce’s voice when he summarizes:
“You lied to us, breached the doctor-patient contract of privacy—if your boy here is even a real doctor—and set Tony back months in terms of personal progress, and you’re trying to tell us it was all for his sake?”
“I’ll have you know I am—”
“If you’re not a fraud you’re a piece of shit,” Bruce cuts off with uncharacteristic profanity, “either way, you’re seriously starting to annoy me.”
Whatshisface the maybe-therapist shuts up with a squeak and Tony—oh, Tony could kiss Bruce right now, if he weren’t too busy trying to think straight without going into another panic attack. He’s not going to prison—or wherever S.H.I.E.L.D wants to take him, that’s certain. He’s seen the kind of cage they built for Bruce. He’s seen what they think of when faced with a problem—he’s not going down without a fight.
It’s a new though, the refusal to die, but there’s no time to examine it—Tony pulls it close instead, wraps it around him like armor while Bruce—skinny, puny little Bruce with the strength of a nuke beneath his skin—continues to stare Fury down, every line of his body rigidly refusing to give Tony up.
“I think we’ve all noticed Stark’s abnormal behavior,” Fury says, as if he hasn’t heard Bruce’s barely-veiled threat, “and considering he’s mentioned wanting to bone a guy higher than Erik Lehnsherr on the public enemies list—”
Tony gags while the others gasp, mostly because he can almost hear it again—the way he wished Loki weren’t such a complicated person and—no, stop. Shut up—focus. Focus, or give yourself time to get there.
“I was thinking of dating actually,” he manages through the tight lump in his throat, mind racing over possibilities, “just so we’re clear.”
Fury twitches at the touch of sarcasm—it’s good. Piss him off, he won’t be thinking quite so well, will he? Shit, Tony was so stupid though, so naïve—for fuck’s sake Tony, focus!
“Do you really think it matters?” Fury asks with a raised eyebrow, “Did you think we hadn’t noticed you dropping off the radar on the regular? And your behavior hasn’t been going better—
“It’s called depression and suicidal tendencies,” Tony counters, the familiar, thin veneer of sarcasm holding him up against the thought of Fury rattling off all the ways he’s still failing.
If Steve’s face is anything to go by, though, it’s already too late. He steps away from Tony and Bruce, eyes wide as saucers, and while Clint and Natasha aren’t moving any more than they have since the beginning, it’s still easy to guess their surprise in the glance they share.
Think, Tony. Either Fury’s genuinely mistaken—unlikely, considering his resources and the ample evidence that Loki on a mind-controlling spree is far from being that subtle—or he’s deliberately pretending for a reason. The first problem would be easy to solve—a couple of hours, at most.
If it’s the second one, Tony needs to get out or he’ll definitely be doomed.
“Look,” Fury start, looking as genuinely regretful as they come, “I didn’t want to come through this, but you’re not giving me a choice. We are taking your assets into custody.”
“The Iron Man is a private property,” Bruce says, the threat in his voice more evident, you can’t—”
“It’s a private weapon,” Steve counters, kind enough to wince when two unknown agents slip into the kitchen.
He says something else next, but Tony’s brain doesn’t bother tracking that, caught up on Fury’s words. We’re taking your assets into custody. Not the suits. Not the armor. The assets. Dummy. Butterfingers. You.
Jarvis.
Tony’s eyes widen as if in slow motion, and then he’s on his feet, running out of the kitchen as he shouts for Jarvis to put the tower on lockdown, Fury’s rage-filled voice roaring for the agents to catch him. Tony manages to slide one of the bulletproof doors back to the hallway, at least two or three guards slipping in after him—damn, he should have made this whole process faster.
Ten more steps, barrel past another doorway—only two guards and the horrifying sound of crushed limbs follow him into the living room. He has to slam the hidden door hidden next to the chimney into somebody’s face to delay them by a precious few seconds, and clatter down the stairs with a hurricane in his lungs.
He wishes Pepper were here—he’d make a joke about actual secret staircases and forget about the phantom weight of a car battery in his hands—but by the time he realizes she’s too far to reach he’s already in the workshop and screaming his core processor access code. Think, he tells himself as he shoves the hidden panel closed behind him and locks it just in time to keep attackers out, damage control, what would Pepper do?
S.H.I.E.L.D doesn’t get Jarvis—it can’t, not ever. Tony has seen the kind of things they did with only their best brains to work on it, and the thought of Jarvis’ decades of advance on any other technology in their hands sends chills down his spine. Tony has to keep him out of anyone’s reach, that much is clear—at least this way, even if he does something horrible, it’ll be on Tony’s head, and no one else. Come on, what would Pepper do?
Not get involved with Loki, for starters. But if she did—if she somehow took a hit to the head and got herself in that situation, with the same profound conviction that Jarvis cannot be allowed into foreign hands, well...it’s not like Tony hasn’t thought of it on his own. One step down, a couple more to go. Now, as Pepper keeps demonstrating, the key to a successful career is time management, right? Right. Let’s manage time, Tony.
“Jarvis,” Tony asks, fingers clenching and unclenching around Loki’s stupid knife that won’t hold its fucking promises, “how long until Fury’s goons get in there?”
“The two in the workshops are currently being kept away from the tools by the house units,” Jarvis replies with a little more trepidation to his voice than usual, “but one of their bullets is bound to hit home, eventually. Best case scenario, you have a little over ten minutes, sir.”
“Let’s assume we’re on worst case,” Tony pushes through gritted teeth.
“Two point fifty-seven minutes.”
Too short to try going around and grabbing a suit, even if it hadn’t been a last-ditch, ‘I don’t want to do this’ reach. Alright. Pepper’s tip to a successful life number two—prioritize. Breathing first—in, hold, out, hold, in, hold, out, hold, repeat until brain starts back. Think.
Plans. They have to go. No one but Tony could have made Jarvis, but any idiot can follow a plan. If S.H.I.E.L.D wants Jarvis, they’ll need the plans or buckle up for twenty years of full-time work. Hardly the takeover they’re going for.
“Okay,” Tony gasps, blinking moisture out of his eyes, “Jarvis, I need you to send a message to Pepper, if you can.”
“The emergency line is under attack,” Jarvis warns, “Transmission not guaranteed.”
“’Kay,” Tony croaks out, eyes closing before he can stop them.
Loki’s knife digs in his palm, between his fingers. His cheeks hurt, nose itching with saltwater dripping onto the tip. His lungs are only seconds from bursting, but he manages to nod when Jarvis announces he’s recording.
“Pepper, they’re wrong, I’m not compromised, I know I’m not, it’s—”
Tony forces his mouth shut when his voice wavers. Limited time. No babbling. Go.
“S.H.I.E.L.D wants Jarvis. Not sure why but I’m not letting them. I’m sorry—don’t leave me there!”
Something bangs outside Tony’s compartment—the metal is too thick for him to hear anything else, but he really hopes none of the bots is damaged beyond repair. There’s no time for a last-minute save, anyway.
God, he’s spent so many hours hunched over the little guys, poured so much of himself into their codes, their casings, their quirks and boo-boos, what’s he going to do now they’re—unavailable, he tells himself firmly. They’ll just be unavailable. For a while. They won’t even notice. They’re just—just—they won’t notice. They won’t hurt. Come on, Tony, you can do this.
“Sir,” Jarvis says, voice oddly gentle through the speakers, “you are running out of time.”
“I know,” Tony replies.
He chokes on the words a little, bumps his forehead against the walls to clear his thoughts—it works and doesn’t at the same time—and manages to produce a pitiful gargle:
“I’ll miss you, Jarvis.”
“Initiating Project Napoleon,” a horrendous excuse for a vocal simulator intones in a droning voice, “execution in fifty nine seconds, fifty-eight, fifty seven—”
A safe box opens next to Tony’s hand, a memory card barely larger than a thumbnail rattling into it for a mere second before Tony catches it and shoves his pants down his legs—
“—thirty-nine, thirty-eight, thirty-seven, thirty-six—”
—shoves the chip and its plastic up his anus, wincing when the angles catch at the sensitive skin there and why didn’t he—why did he have to—oh, fuck, Jarvis—
“—thirty four, thirty-three, thirty-two—”
—yanks the whole thing back up, holds in a scream as the first suit explodes overhead—
“—sixteen, fifteen, fourteen, thirteen, twelve, eleven, ten—”
—zips himself up, vaguely hopes he’ll die—
“—nine, eight, seven, six, five, four—”
—closes his eyes, breathes out—
“—three, two, one.”
Acrid smoke burns at his lung with the hiss of an air-tight door opening.
Alarms howl to life.
He falls.
{ooo}
“I’m not mind-controlled,” Tony repeats for the thousandth time, forehead braced against the glass wall of his cell, “Fury’s lying.”
On the other side, Steve looks at him with infinite sadness, the kind that says he wishes he could believe the lovely lie he’s being offered but will face the truth for a friend’s sake. The irony is not lost on Tony, and he sorts of wants to smash the expression off with a crowbar.
“He’s made an enemy to the Avengers when he tried to take your suits,” Steve points out, “and he knows it.”
“And yet you’re still with him,” Tony replies, too tired to put much venom into it.
“It’s too stupid a move to be a conspiracy, Tony,” Steve insists, infuriatingly gentle though it all.
Tony hasn’t slept or sat down since he woke up here about five hours ago, which he figures explains why he can’t even bring himself to shake his head. He doesn’t even know if this is a Steve thing or a forties thing, clinging to the possibility of brain washing, but it hardly matters. He doesn’t have any way to prove this—not when they’re all working under the assumption that he’ll try and lie his way out of this mess.
They’ve been around, the lot of them. Fury, to inform him Clint got freed by a solid knock to the head, but S.H.I.E.L.D is willing to try softer treatments. Clint and Natasha snuck in—or so their poses seemed to say—to make sure his cell was as nice as a bare, sheets-free bed and the chrome equivalent of a hole in the ground can be...and Bruce, telling him the blood samples he’d taken of all of them for study purposes have gone missing.
And Steve, presumably to assess the damage by himself, like he always does.
Too bad he’s inflicting most of it at the moment.
“I’m not mind-controlled,” Tony repeats after a long silence,idly wishing he had bars to rest his arms on, “I’ve been hanging out with Loki for four months. If he really were controlling me it’d be one hell of a long-term game.”
A shit strategy, too. What do they all think, that Tony was gonna join the dark side out of pity? Please. Loki probably knows better than try that—should know better, in any case. Tony would tell Fury as much, really, if it didn’t somehow feel like betraying someone—Loki or himself, that’s still a mystery, but betrayal is betrayal, regardless.
Besides, what could he say? ‘It’s not mind-control if he spills his git as much as I do’? Best case scenario, someone would try to use that as a way to get more intel and, well. Friend. Or at least, from where Tony’s standing there’s friendship.
Loki’s radio silence doesn’t exactly say good things about where Tony stands on his priority list.
“Maybe he’s already got what he wanted,” Steve replies, “and he’s keeping you on a leash because you’re a valuable asset.”
“I didn’t take the samples,” Tony sighs, weary of that non-conversation already.
Bruce said the safe was broken into, though the means are still to be determined. If anything, Tony likes to think he’d be smarter about covering his tracks, even under mind control. Besides, from what he’s seen of Loki, he doesn’t seem the type to hold onto useless things unless they’ve got some form of sentimental value, but well. It’s not like saying that would make his situation any better. Worst case scenario, people are going to assume he’s Loki’s accomplice, anyway.
“Honestly, the guy managed to play Thor’s all-seeing bodyguard. Wouldn’t he be a little more subtle about theft?”
Not that Loki has a big history of subtlety in this world, but still. There’s showy, and then there’s stupid.
“Tony,” Steve sighs, disgustingly weary for someone who isn’t in a cell, “are you trying to imply somebody is using you to frame Loki?”
It’s ridiculous, Tony knows—that’s the only thing keeping him from saying yes. Still, he’s been thinking and over-thinking this thing through for the past five hours, and everything else makes even less sense. He can’t be the prime target of this stint—not when S.H.I.E.L.D as personified by Fury recovered so well from Jarvis’ loss. Not when everyone is still firmly blaming Loki for this debacle...not with the battery of tests, some of which he’s imagined himself, looking for magic he’s been subjected to. So, given that he isn’t dead or being taunted with the news coverage that his fall would generate, Tony is pretty sure he’s not the main objective.
The question is, who would frame Loki, and why?
Tony as a proxy sort of makes sense—he’s big, with enough resources to be a threat if compromised—but Loki already tried to conquer the planet, it’s hard to make himself more undesirable than that. Whoever is behind this, whether it’s Fury—impossible to dismiss, although something about the idea feels off—or someone else entirely, they were clearly hoping for Jarvis as a neat bonus prize. They failed, thanks to Tony’s Afghanistan-born paranoia, but that doesn’t change anything to it.
None of that solves the question of why though, and Steve seems to take Tony’s silence as a confession of guilt because he sighs and says:
“See? Even you can’t come up with a reasonable reason for us to trust you.”
“I kind of thought trust came with the ‘friends’ territory,” Tony hisses before he goes for the belt: “either I got some funny idea about us being friend or that guy Bucky wasn’t the man I thought he was.”
“Bucky didn’t try to kill himself!” Steve roars, angry snarl stopping inches away from the glass, “he didn’t suddenly decide his friends couldn’t be trusted with anything and start giving them the slip whenever he couldn’t be arsed to deal with his problems! And he certainly didn’t go from hating the enemy’s gut to pretending they were good guys in four months’ time!”
“I’m not saying he’s a good guy, I’m saying he’s not doing anything to me right now!” Tony protests, voice rising dangerously close to a yell.
Don’t do anything stupid, he tells himself, fingers clenching into fists against the glass, don’t go there.
“Right,” Steve says, voice tight and body taut, “because you’d know that.”
“I’d at least hope you guys could see I’m still using my brain!”
“Are you?”
Steve’s gaze pointedly goes to Tony’s wrist, and Tony surprises himself when he pounds on the glass hard enough to feel something give under the skin. Steve gives him a shocked puppy look, like he’d only been saying the most reasonable thing, like there’s no reason for fury to tear at Tony’s temples—his ribs, his palms—until the world drowns into a sea of red.
“Oh, of course,” Tony hisses, barely more than a breath between the two of them, “of course you’d think I’m stupid for it—”
“I didn’t say—”
“Yes you did!” Tony cuts off, bile burning at his throat like poison, “Stupid Tony Stark, with his money and his name and his brain who builds things no one else could dream of and still finds ways to try and die! Useless Tony Stark, who could do so much for the world and gets drunk and parties instead—don’t you think I’ve heard it all by now? Don’t you think I know that?”
“Tony, I wasn’t—”
“Oh, shut the fuck up, Rogers!”
Steve’s face falls, and Tony should stop, should be ashamed and hate himself—will be ashamed and hate himself soon enough—but for now he’s hurting as much as he’s ever hurt, and he’s taken it in silence long enough damnit! He’s taken it all in—the punches, the disdain, the reproaches, and fuck they’ve hurt, but to have them fall from Captain America’s mouth? From the same guy he’s admired and hated since he was old enough to remember?
Well, there had to be a last straw at some point.
“I’m a screwed up, useless piece of shit of a failure, don’t you see that? We’re not all like you—we can’t all be America’s golden boy, the poster child for everything good and righteous on this earth—some of us are just useless messes, that’s how it is! You want a lie? You want a facade? Try the guy you thought I was before this whole debacle! God, Rogers, why do you think I wanted to die?”
“Tony, you didn’t really—”
“Oh yes I did!” Tony hisses, voice dropping almost to a whisper, a thin sliver of poison he can almost feel drifting out of his body and into Steve’s ears, “believe me, I wanted to—haven’t you heard the docs? Five minutes later and I was done for, and that was the goal. But of course,” Tony continues in a more regular volume, “you don’t see that. You don’t believe that. How could you, you perfect, self-righteous ass? You don’t have to wake up every morning wondering if anybody would ever miss you, do you? I bet you’ve never even doubted you had anything to offer the world, have you? You have no idea what it feels like to be me.”
“Tony,” Steve tries again, eyes shining as his face crumbles, “I didn’t mean to—”
“You know I hate you, right?” Tony asks, voice rising with every word, “I tried to hide it—I tried to be a good teammate, a good friend, even, ha! Like I’d ever be worth that! But I hate you, Rogers. I’ve spent my entire life listening to the world rant about how perfect, how chivalrous, how painfully golden you were—all my life. Gods, the hours Howard spent looking for you, talking about you—the house was a fucking museum, your name never to be spoken in vain, and I spent so much time trying to beat you, trying to be better than you—I should have known it was a lost fight from the start! How dumb can I get, right? And the worst part is—the worst part is you—you’re—you! You don’t even have the decency to just be a random schmuck with lab-grown muscles, no! You have to go an live up to the legend! Smile at kittens, never cries, always right mister Rogers, prancing around like a gift from God while the rest of us just—just—”
Tony turns away from Steve with a strangled cry of anger and frustration, hands flailing aimlessly at his side. He wants to break something—smash a vase, rip sheets apart, kick the toilets until he dents the metal, scream into a pillow all at the same time but somehow, all of it seems so—so—stupid, and over dramatic, and Tony just—just—
“Tony, no!” Steve yells when Tony hits his forehead with the butt of his hand for the first time, “stop! Don’t do that!”
Tony doesn’t stop, hitting at his forehead again and again until a piercing headache settles in his skull for the long haul. There’s just—there’s too much. It’s all too much. The pain, the anger, the hatred, the frustration, and now Steve—what the fuck is Tony supposed to do with this? Be patient? Be understanding? Be kind? When was the world ever kind to him?
Yeah, sure, they’re the accident of birth—there’s the money, and the girls—but there’s the loneliness and despair too, there’s the betrayals and the attempted murders, and there’s the gnawing pit of emptiness inside, where he knows even Pepper and Rhodey can’t reach because they’re trying—bless their souls, they’ve been trying so hard—but Tony is just far too fucked up for it to work! And really how is any of it fair? Is that what he gets for being born filthy rich? Is that it? Some kind of cosmic punishment saying he can have one but not the other, that if he’s going to go through life not knowing what it’s like to worry about money he’s damned well gonna know what it’s like to watch everyone he loves leave though his own faults?
“Please, Tony,” Steve tries again when Tony’s hands reach for his face and settle there, as if he could make the world disappear just by not seeing it, “you don’t have to do that. This isn’t—”
“Get out,” Tony tells him, voice muffled by his fingers.
“Tony, I’m trying to—”
“Just get out. Leave me alone. I don’t want to talk to you.”
There’s a quiet gasp and a shuffle of feet, like Steve is about to protest again, but Tony doesn’t have it in him to ask again. He wipes his face instead, more surprised than he should be to find it wet, and makes his way over to the bed.
His brain feels like it’s banging at the edges of his skull when he faceplants into the mattress, the pain sharp and pointed as a knife, but he doesn’t care. He’ll hate his words—hate himself for them—soon enough, maybe. If he’s good enough a man for that. For now, the whole thing feels mostly like he’s drawn all the pus from a wound—not lighter exactly, not better by a long shot, but still feeling like it’s a first step of healing.
Steve leaves.
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What happened to Erie County Democrats? – The Buffalo News
https://uniteddemocrats.net/?p=3908
What happened to Erie County Democrats? – The Buffalo News
Back when state Comptroller Carl McCall was running for governor in 2002, he used to joke about treading carefully through the land mines of Erie County’s Democratic politics.
“I have to make five different stops every time I come to Erie County, so one or another warring faction doesn’t get offended,” he said back then.
They were the “glory days” for the Politics Column. One Democratic group constantly sniped at another, ethnic factions regularly sparred, and top leaders vied for power. The Politics Column was never lacking fodder.
We still churn it out every week, and politics around these parts remains as fascinating as ever. But these days Democrats seem to behave themselves under Chairman Jeremy Zellner, and party stalwarts are OK with that.
“If you look at the last three years, there’s really been a decline in all that as we’ve brought people together and prevented the warfare,” Zellner said a few days ago. “A lot of the toxic politics of the past stemmed from people who – frankly – are under indictment now.”
Zellner was referring to G. Steven Pigeon, the former Democratic chairman and political operative who stands trial in State Supreme Court beginning Oct. 15 on a host of corruption charges. A trial to weigh federal charges will follow. As he is sidelined by legal troubles, his perennial challenges to the leaders that succeeded him have ended.
As Zellner points out, Democrats will always contend with primaries. But the relatively few intra-party challenges shaping up for September stem from plain old politics as opposed to the blood feuds of the past.
Indeed, the most fascinating Democratic primary – a rematch between Erik Bohen and Pat Burke for the 142nd Assembly seat – may not even occur. Democrat Bohen, who triumphed over Burke on the Republican and Conservative lines in an April 24 special election, is already nominated by his new best friends for the November general.
But he is also circulating Democratic designating petitions after Zellner and company again snubbed him during a “woodshed” meeting at which Bohen unsuccessfully sought the party nod. Democrats are still smarting from his victory on “enemy” lines, are reveling in his Assembly isolation by both Dems and Repubs, and are itching for a rematch against Burke.
“It turned into a scene again,” Bohen said of the endorsement meeting that took great pains to feature his victory photos with GOP Chairman Nick Langworthy.
Bohen remains uncommitted about running in the September Democratic primary, however, or opting for just the November general. He might pull a “Mickey Kearns,” his Assembly predecessor and registered Democrat who won the county clerk post last year on the GOP and Conservative lines. Several sources say Republican and Conservative leaders are urging him to take the same route that worked for him in April and for Kearns in November.
Lackawanna Mayor Geoff Szymanski, by the way, has decided not to run for the Assembly and will support Burke.
“I’m not a lefty Democrat, and that doesn’t go over very well with all the downstaters,” he said last week.
In the meantime, another “non-primary” is shaping up in the 60th Senate District of Republican Chris Jacobs. Repub-turned-Dem Kevin Stocker, who had competed for the seat as a Republican in the past, said a few days ago he will not run as a Democrat this year despite assembling a team to circulate petitions. He will support Carima El-Behairy, a business consultant and treasurer for Planned Parenthood of Central and Western New York who has been endorsed by the party.
Those yearning for the good old days may still see a Democratic primary against incumbent Tim Kennedy in the 63rd District. Attorney Shaqurah Zachery is circulating petitions in a quest for the required 1,500 signatures. But she said a few days ago she is still deciding whether to challenge the entrenched incumbent.
Of course, all of this “peace in the valley” stuff will fade away. This is Erie County, after all, and these are Erie County Democrats. One of these days …
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// sanada yukimura - verses
{ Brave 10 } – ( ver ) .gatherer╰☆╮(❝Sanada Yukimura❞)
Sanada Yukimura, the Lord of Ueda, and? The gatherer of the 10 Braves. He made it his mission to pull together a team of people, ten strong, and? Well, the rest of it? He’s not likely to reveal to a great many people. What you need to know about him? Is that he’s carefree, fun-loving, lucky, and? A little bit of a pain in the ass. What people don’t know? Well, Yukimura is much smarter and stronger than he might first appear- Regardless of the impression that he gives you? He’s very much the analytical sort. Things don’t miss his gaze often.
{ Brave 10 S } – ( ver ) .fate╰☆╮(❝Sanada Yukimura❞)
A fair bit more stressed than he was in the previous series, events have lead him to being a tad bit- Darker? He takes things a little more seriously now, though does appear to still try to make a bit of a game out of it, much to the distress of his poor overworked page. As of recent? He has adopted one of his former Brave’s as his heir, and has hired as a former enemy as a current ally- I can’t see where any of this could possibly go wrong, can you?
{ Younger Years } – ( ver ) .youth╰☆╮(❝Sanada Yukimura❞)
The years immediately around the time he had just met the Unno twins, and had started having Rokurou as an ally and friend. Yes, of course, these years could be a little rough on both of them, but? These awkward years are also how they best got to know each other, back when it was mostly the two of them. Because of this, Yukimura appears even morecarefree than his Brave 10 years. Rokurou? You have a lot of work ahead of you!
{ War Years } – ( ver ) .demon╰☆╮(❝Sanada Yukimura❞)
“The Crimson Demon,” Sanada Yukimura is a feared force on the battlefield. This verse follows all of his war years, and the time of his life that he was his most active. These years? Are the years that Yukimura spends fighting for his life, and trying to keep those around him alive. Because of this? He doesn’t have as much time to be carefree or playful, though? He does try to keep moods light around him, regardless.
{ Modern AU } – ( ver ) .wisdom╰☆╮(❝Sanada Yukimura❞)
Very surprisingly? This carefree man had decided to dedicate himself to the path of Education! And? By that? I mean he has become a teacher. Despite this, he doesn’t appear altogether too serious about his job from time to time- But? Despite his goofy nature, he can be surprisingly strict about his students meeting certain requirements. (After all! What they learn in his class really might be the different between success and failure someday!) Also? He appears to be aiming for the principle position in the school- Lord help them all.
#.obcasus╰☆╮(❝SUNSET❞) – ( verses. )#( ch ) .crimson demon╰☆╮(❝Sanada Yukimura❞)#( ch ) .verse╰☆╮(❝Sanada Yukimura❞)#( ver ) .gatherer╰☆╮(❝Sanada Yukimura❞)#( ver ) .fate╰☆╮(❝Sanada Yukimura❞)#( ver ) .youth╰☆╮(❝Sanada Yukimura❞)#( ver ) .demon╰☆╮(❝Sanada Yukimura❞)#( ver ) .wisdom╰☆╮(❝Sanada Yukimura❞)#.dilatio ╰☆╮(❝DELAY❞) – ( queue. )
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#usnavy .@pacificsubs .@thenatinterest .@potus .@vp @usnavy @us_stratcom @usmc .@usnavy .@pacificcommand @navalreactors @u snavyeurope #usnavy howdoyou explain em that it is luck ifi t is YOU whogets forcemultipliers instead badcuts Thatitisluc k ifyouhavethe time to iron out aaaaallthe problems they cause. Pressureto readiness is ok sometimes even good But thegame you ride then mustnot be par ity with the foe Parity kills Letalone enemies outnumbering a nd you in realistically duress pressures of budget Ie the ca using budget pressures offer the only alternative of surely more ships later Right.... Inthis you must make a domination game not a parity +hope on b udget later Sure https ://babyawacs.wordpress.com/2021/02/06/potus-potus-vp-usnavy-pogo-us_stratcom-u-smc-usnavy-paci ficcommand-navalreactors-usnavyeuropejoebiden-if-you-like-one-invention-ofmine-this-is-your-n avy-plan/ #joebiden #if #you #like #one #invention #ofmine #this : #is: #your: #navy #plan .@potus .@vp @usnavy @us_stratcom @usmc .@usnavy .@pacificcom mand @navalreactors @usnavyeurope https://www.pogo.org/analy sis/2021/01/navys-plans-to-counter-china-may-be-doomed-by-shipbuilding-disasters/ the reco mmended path is a path for a mediocre and overwhealmed navy w hile it bets on highhopes on budget ********** the game o f the us navy royalnavy must be take any advantage you c an get the reduced crewrequirements+keepcrewhappy is critic al all flaws must be handled as did you cut the comp arative advantage due to budgetary measures doyou complain it didnt mature enough yet in peacetime *********** w hat the proposal is hoping the us debtload will surely enable parity of chinese numbers but thattttttwillbe luckily oldproven tech then eheeeeverythings j ust fine and if we cut the crew completely evenbetter right .... bet on stressed budgets indefensible budgets bet on force multipliers do not complain about pioneer tech flaws not mature y e t t t t t t t letalone ifyou cut forcemult ipliers front and end but hope for a non-supercharged fleet a nd its peacetime soyou can play with less flawed ships ** *********** bet on overstressed budgets + take any adva ntage you can get pay t h a t + y e y its peace we have time and effort to fix the flaws of (!)force multipliers + reduce crewrequirments with moderntech but k eep em happy + integrate the navy as a (!)strategic missile defense network automated and highly interconnected and foremost network safety (tight on boosterphases of launches/even mi dcourse data of anykind helps/ ifnoteven interception thesoonerthebetter) ************** whatever itis aim for 10xfold forcemultiplier for tripled co st of regular designs or triple forcemultplier for parity cost of conventional design the mix from this path can be bet ter but bet on a 200 ship navy rather than a 500ship navy the list in washington is long the economic basis of anythin g fullof trickery the central banks softland a very v ery very very very critical economic mess itis far far far worse than admirals can know ask the central banks geniusses how bad is it how bad isit r e a l l y I am Christia n KISS BabyAWACS – Raw Independent Sophistication #THINKTANK + #INTEL #HELLHOLE #BLOG https://www.BabyAWACS.com/ Inquiry@Ba byAWACS.com PHONE / FAX +493212 611 34 64 Helpful? Pay. Suppor t. Donnate. paypal.me/ChristianKiss @northropgrumman @hiiindu stries @lockheedmarting @rr @bae you! consider youhave reached a breaking point with your cust omers where you must d e l i v e r and b e t t e r t h a n p r o m i s t e d Canigetabit info f18 vs chinese s400c lone? Russian s500? Oreven irani s300? .@potus .@vp @usnavy @u s_stratcom @usmc .@usnavy .@pacificcommand @navalreactors @usna vyeurope Is yet-sucky-sortie-rate on a systemaimed toincrease it, the issue if youwant em back
#usnavy .@pacificsubs .@thenatinterest .@potus .@vp @usnavy @us_stratcom @usmc .@usnavy .@pacificcommand @navalreactors @u snavyeurope #usnavy howdoyou explain em that it is luck ifi t is YOU whogets forcemultipliers instead badcuts Thatitisluc k ifyouhavethe time to iron out aaaaallthe problems they cause. Pressureto readiness is ok sometimes even good But thegame you ride then mustnot be par ity with the foe Parity kills Letalone enemies outnumbering a nd you in realistically duress pressures of budget Ie the ca using budget pressures offer the only alternative of surely more ships later Right…. Inthis you must make a domination game not a parity +hope on b udget later Sure https ://babyawacs.wordpress.com/2021/02/06/potus-potus-vp-usnavy-pogo-us_stratcom-u-smc-usnavy-paci ficcommand-navalreactors-usnavyeuropejoebiden-if-you-like-one-invention-ofmine-this-is-your-n avy-plan/ #joebiden #if #you #like #one #invention #ofmine #this : #is: #your: #navy #plan .@potus .@vp @usnavy @us_stratcom @usmc .@usnavy .@pacificcom mand @navalreactors @usnavyeurope https://www.pogo.org/analy sis/2021/01/navys-plans-to-counter-china-may-be-doomed-by-shipbuilding-disasters/ the reco mmended path is a path for a mediocre and overwhealmed navy w hile it bets on highhopes on budget ********** the game o f the us navy royalnavy must be take any advantage you c an get the reduced crewrequirements+keepcrewhappy is critic al all flaws must be handled as did you cut the comp arative advantage due to budgetary measures doyou complain it didnt mature enough yet in peacetime *********** w hat the proposal is hoping the us debtload will surely enable parity of chinese numbers but thattttttwillbe luckily oldproven tech then eheeeeverythings j ust fine and if we cut the crew completely evenbetter right …. bet on stressed budgets indefensible budgets bet on force multipliers do not complain about pioneer tech flaws not mature y e t t t t t t t letalone ifyou cut forcemult ipliers front and end but hope for a non-supercharged fleet a nd its peacetime soyou can play with less flawed ships ** *********** bet on overstressed budgets + take any adva ntage you can get pay t h a t + y e y its peace we have time and effort to fix the flaws of (!)force multipliers + reduce crewrequirments with moderntech but k eep em happy + integrate the navy as a (!)strategic missile defense network automated and highly interconnected and foremost network safety (tight on boosterphases of launches/even mi dcourse data of anykind helps/ ifnoteven interception thesoonerthebetter) ************** whatever itis aim for 10xfold forcemultiplier for tripled co st of regular designs or triple forcemultplier for parity cost of conventional design the mix from this path can be bet ter but bet on a 200 ship navy rather than a 500ship navy the list in washington is long the economic basis of anythin g fullof trickery the central banks softland a very v ery very very very critical economic mess itis far far far worse than admirals can know ask the central banks geniusses how bad is it how bad isit r e a l l y I am Christia n KISS BabyAWACS – Raw Independent Sophistication #THINKTANK + #INTEL #HELLHOLE #BLOG https://www.BabyAWACS.com/ Inquiry@Ba byAWACS.com PHONE / FAX +493212 611 34 64 Helpful? Pay. Suppor t. Donnate. paypal.me/ChristianKiss @northropgrumman @hiiindu stries @lockheedmarting @rr @bae you! consider youhave reached a breaking point with your cust omers where you must d e l i v e r and b e t t e r t h a n p r o m i s t e d Canigetabit info f18 vs chinese s400c lone? Russian s500? Oreven irani s300? .@potus .@vp @usnavy @u s_stratcom @usmc .@usnavy .@pacificcommand @navalreactors @usna vyeurope Is yet-sucky-sortie-rate on a systemaimed toincrease it, the issue if youwant em back
#usnavy .@pacificsubs .@thenatinterest .@potus .@vp @usnavy @us_stratcom @usmc .@usnavy .@pacificcommand @navalreactors @usnavyeurope #usnavy howdoyou explain em that it is luck ifit is YOU whogets forcemultipliers instead badcuts Thatitisluck ifyouhavethe time to iron out aaaaallthe problems they cause. Pressureto readiness is ok sometimes even good But thegame you ride then mustnot be parity…
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Surprise! There’s a hot new release from #romanceclass! I know you’ve waited long enough for this so here’s a treat for you.
*clears throat*
S U M M E R F E E L S B L O G T O U R A N D G I V E A W A Y!
I haven’t finished reading the book yet but it’s a pleasure for me to introduce you to Summer Feels. So far, I am enjoying the stories in the anthology. It’s a good book that you can bring to the beach or just some place where you can unwind and get a kick out of your summer vacay. After all, outdoor activities that come this summer shouldn’t stop you from binge-reading romance! At least, for me.
Summer Feels
Anthology by #romanceclass
Edited and Compiled by: Kate Sebastian
Genre: Contemporary Romance
Release Date: April 30, 2017
B L U R B
Summer loving happens so fast, as you’ll find with Summer Feels, an anthology of 23 stories of love under the summer sun by #romanceclass authors. Savor the candied thrill of firsts—first loves, first kisses, first solo vacations—and the bittersweet triumph of second chances.
Tour the Philippines as the stories take you to mountain retreats and island paradises. Let the magic of the hot sun, clear blue skies, and lots of love take you on a roller coaster ride of feels. With stories ranging from sweet to sexy, there’s sure to be something for any fan of romance.
Featured Stories and Authors
At the Bermuda Triangle by Elea Andrea Almazora
Secondhand Wanderlust by Erleen Alvarez
The Search for the Kissing Monster by Ella Banta
Flying With You by��Rachelle Belaro
Guide for a Day by H. Bentham
Buttered Sunset by Halina Cabrera
Busy Out of the Friendzone by Charlie Dio
Wedding Night Stand by Mina V. Esguerra
The Game of Twenty Questions by Elizabeth Galit
Then Derrick Was Back by Georgette S. Gonzales
The Summer You Said Hello by Ami Granada
Love After Summer by Irene Jurado
Alter Christus by Catherine Lo
Beachin’ Summer by Arlene Manocot
Four Basic Principles by Bianca Mori
The Swimming Instructor by Eris Peñaluna
Lucky in Paradise by Farrah F. Polestico
Ready to Run by Kit Salazar
Fall for Me by Miel Salva
All About That Bass by Fay Sebastian
An Overdue Adventure by Kate Sebastian
Buddy System by Yeyet Soriano
Anything Can Happen by Marian Tee
Quotes From the 23 Stories
Feel free to download the photo with a quote that struck you the most and post it on social media as your #QOTD (quote of the day) and use the hashtags #SummerFeels #romanceclass. You may choose as many as you can!
BOOK LINKS
❤ Amazon
❤ Goodreads
❤ Pre-Order Print Copy (Philippines only)
Playlist
Want to listen to some feel-good music while reading this book? Check out Fay Sebastian’s playlist for All About That Bass–a story within the anthology.
https://open.spotify.com/user/mileventwelve/playlist/5oOwOYKNRoMI1IUK3OtMPl
Share this playlist on social media and don’t forget to use the hashtags #TeamLiRika #SummerFeels #romanceclass!
GIVEAWAY
Click HERE to join the giveaway and win these cool prizes:
International
❤ Amazon gift card worth $25
Philippines Only
Print books from some of the authors:
❤ My Dutch Billionaire by Marian Tee
❤ Kate, Finally by Yeyet Soriano
❤ Old Enemies Make the Best Lovers by Kate Sebastian
About #romanceclass ❤
#romanceclass is a community of authors who attended various writing workshops organized by Mina V. Esguerra, readers of books by those authors, and readers of English-language romance books by Filipino authors. Visit www.romanceclassbooks.com to see the full catalog of books!
BLOG TOUR + GIVEAWAY || Summer Feels Anthology by #romanceclass Surprise! There's a hot new release from #romanceclass! I know you've waited long enough for this so here's a treat for you.
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Marvel Contest of Champions is an innovative take on comics and fighting games. It blends the best of both worlds, putting your favorite Marvel heroes in a fighting arena for your entertainment. This mobile fighting game was developed for both iOS and Android mobile platforms as well. This game features the world’s most esteemed marvel characters, including Spider Man and the Incredible Hulk. It takes big screen characters, and condenses them to a game-oriented, engaging format, allowing you to voyage through missions and challenges with Captain America and for more: http://marvelcontestofchampionshack.onlinecheats4u.com
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youtube
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