#currently experiencing the Redemption emotion

[la-muerta]

[ENG SUB + Translation] Hou Minghao's farewell message to Zhao Yuanzhou, 16 Nov 2024

"There's always a breeze or two in the mortal world that can send me on beautiful dreams for 18,000 miles."

This trip in the mortal world is a journey that I, Zhao Yuanzhou, had to make.

A one-word spell: Dream. Now, let me tell you a story...

In the Great Wilderness, everyone knows me, and everyone sees me as the Great Demon that has committed every evil deed, deserving of death. But I made the unexpected choice to enter the fray with sworn enemies, old friends, and new acquaintances, embarking on a new path investigating cases and hunting demons together. To voluntarily sign a contract that decided my death date... most people would think that is an ill-omened beginning. But to me it was a relief, to finally be free of the prison that was of my own making...

Fate bound our demon hunting team together, and as we solved cases together, we got to know each other's true hearts. Some amongst us conquered might with gentleness, some amongst us were full of righteousness, some soft-hearted despite our tough exterior, some are lively troublemakers, some holding on to a true heart. Such a motley crew coming together and the only thing they seemed to be able to agree on was: that I wasn't to be trusted. They know me as Zhao Yuanzhou, but they can't forget all the evil I did as a Great Demon. But it didn't matter since I didn't hold much hope for myself as well, so all these other emotions didn't mean anything to me.

If you asked why I came here, I would tell you it's because I am the Great Demon Zhu Yan, forced to bear the burden of being born as a "vessel". I lost control and made an unredeemable mistake, and only death can eliminate the pain in my heart. Living is torture; Death is the gift of relief. However, I also wanted to give myself a chance at redemption, a boat rowing against the current.

Along the way, the demon hunting team encountered many complicated cases, but we worked hand in hand to solve them and the blades that we had pointed towards each other were turned towards the outside. Sworn enemies became comrades in arms, and as we took one step closer to saving the world, we also uncovered wounds that had already scarred over. As we saw each other's past wounds more clearly, we saw the past laughter that was used to hide the pain. Those who had a responsibility to protect found themselves unable to, those bearing the burdens of upholding the family's honour were just trapped in a dream, and those should have grown up with no worries found their world turned upside down overnight...

If you have a nightmare, someone might comfort you by saying don't worry, everything that happens in a dream is inverted. But what if it's a beautiful dream? Everything I'd experienced felt so real to me. As I journeyed on, I began to get lost in the dream. I started to wonder, what was I going to do if I was the one who lost everyone else in the end? I have to confess, I began to feel reluctant to part with everyone...

The lonely boat travels across the bitter seas, but friendship caused waves to rise in a heart that had died. Along the way, we mended each other bit by bit. What I have experienced is too beautiful for the other "me" to ever understand. The wish to enjoy the passing seasons and happiness of an ordinary life held great hidden strength, so that even though I already knew the ending, I did not give up the struggle. Because of all of you, I was driven not just by my thoughts of despair, but by my desire to protect all of you.

Be it the Great Wilderness or the mortal realm, everything must return to its original path. If you grieve over the fact that Zhu Yan did not get a chance to choose, then I will tell you that it was only a dream. If you are looking forward to embarking on a new journey with Zhao Yuanzhou's companions, then you have to wake up to hear the rest of the story. By the way, don't forget what I said – in the future, when it rains, that means I've come to accompany you. Turn the boat around and think of it as a big dream. On the other shore, someone is searching for me. A one-word spell: Wake.

The days I spent with Zhu Yan/Zhao Yuanzhou, confining myself to my shell and experiencing a life seeking an inevitable end, but I also felt the redemption in the countdown. For an actor, this was a very special creative process. The director's help, encouragement, and trust played a huge role in letting me experience this unique and meaningful role of Zhao Yuanzhou. He gave me a lot of room to interpret the one and only Zhao Yuanzhou, and with this support, I was able to accompany Zhao Yuanzhou through this journey, and finally entrust him to you, the audience, with peace of mind.

Also unforgettable were our companions who were with us every step of the way, and the process of everyone coming together in the creative process is very enjoyable, very satisfying, very worthwhile, and I will remember those scenes vividly. I will miss the Great Wilderness, the Demon Hunting Bureau, and the Kunlun Mountains... places where we left our joys and sorrows. Thanks to Wen Xiao, Xiao Zhuo-daren, Pei Sijing, Xiao Jiu, Ying Lei – because of our little demon hunting squad, Zhao Yuanzhou left knowing he was loved. Thank you to my ride-or-die Li Lun, we didn't forget our oath to protect the Great Wilderness. Thank you to my dear friend Zhao Wan'er, and Grandpa Yingzhao, who gave Yuanzhou the rare warmth of familial affection! Last but not least, I would like to thank all the crew behind the scenes for their hard work over the past few months. I have woken up from the dream, but my heart will always remember.

Signed, Zhu Yan/Zhao Yuanzhou, with remorse but no regrets

[blueberrypancakesworld]

hii a little bit ago I ask if you could write loc dead x fem reader who self harms and I loved the one you wrote but could you please write another one 💕

I will hold you

warning : hurt/comfort, self-harm, emotional, kissing, no use fo Y/n

Info : Yeah I remember your request hope you like this one and have fun reading even if it's a little short but regardless have fun reading ;)

masterlist

Disclaimer : I don't want to glorify anything it's about the actors who play a role, not the real events.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Pain

Pain is something that everyone feels at some point, whether it's when you hurt yourself cutting fruit, when you get a stomach ache from laughing or when you're just sad.

But there have also been days, weeks, months, years and decades when you can't get rid of pain. Something that gets stuck in you and hurts you with every passing day.

He knew it, the blond singer of the band knew this feeling, he experienced it every day and could only soften it slightly through the music with his heart by his side. But exactly this pain had captured him and his girlfriend, the one he loved, who was like the light at the end of the tunnel. But even this light can grow dimmer from time to time.

A light that is permeated by pain, a light that has been destroyed by fire, by ice, by metal and by his own body. He had tried it himself and had gone into this spiral abyss, but he had overcome it for a few days at a time and had now somewhat accepted it and survived.

But it was always painful for him when he caught his heart interrupting him and he went home to the room in the house they all shared. He didn't feel the smell of fire after a fire, it was different.

,,Darling! I'm back!" he called into the house, hearing something fall to the floor before he ran upstairs to her, the door to the room was torn open without a lock before he saw that she had thrown the lighter to the floor, the knife lying next to her, but the look of fear, rejection, pain he saw on her face was the most painful thing he had ever seen. That look he knew was a cry for help, a scream that only gave surface to her pain.

A pain they both knew, something they shared and yet hid prematurely. Sometimes, however, they bumped into each other and saw what was going on inside the other.

But the fire they both had not seen for a long time. ,,Wait, darling, just wait a moment," he said hastily, running out of the room and into the bathroom where he grabbed the first-aid kit, which was still more than half full, but it would do.

The crying he heard from her was sad and lonely in her current state. Something that bothered him she shouldn't suffer and yet this was easier said than done as he knew it was painful.

They both knew that this life was painful but life should never be like this. ,,Here I am," he said and knelt down in front of her, wordlessly yet gently taking her arm, the burns and cuts not too deep but the pain of this brief redemption was something she had felt without seeing the end.

,,I'm sorry," she murmured, tears flowing down her cheeks and hiding behind her hand as her friend touched her. She tried to soothe a little while he disinfected the wounds and cleaned the burn cream they had bought just for this.

,,It's not okay, I'm here…it could have been worse but my heart I'm here okay it's going to be okay" he talked to her as he sealed the bandages around her wounds with tape and pulled her into his arms.

Her sniffling mumbles of apology only caused him to hold her tighter. Just stay with me for today, we'll get through this," he reassured her, kissing her head softly, listening to her crying gradually become less and less.

Maybe she even had hope that she could now see the light at the end of the tunnel and not the other way around. He was her light in times when she knew how hard it was. But in the end they would make it, they had always made it somehow and they were making it today.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[jovialmoonprincess]

AU: Journey to Redemption (Part 3)

First Part. / The Winter Ball / Champagne Problems

Coriolanus Snow x Fem!reader 

Summary: Y/N, a young idealist in Panem, dreams of making a difference in a post-war society. As the winner of the prestigious Plinth Prize is about to be announced, a mysterious woman unveils a grim fate for Coriolanus Snow, Y/N's nemesis. Offered a chance to alter destiny, Y/N must navigate her conflicting emotions and intervene in pivotal moments to prevent Snow's descent into darkness. The story unfolds against the backdrop of complex relationships, past connections, and the challenges of a changing world, as Y/N grapples with the responsibility of shaping an unexpected destiny and challenging the very fabric of fate.

Warning(s): None, enemy to lovers, back in time, destiny, Snow being in love, Snow being Snow, possible grammar and spelling mistakes

A/N: First Fic EVER, dont be mean pls. Also Im not a english native speaker, sorry for any spelling errors. Feedback is appreciated! Follow or like (or both) for part 4!

The last dance before the Plinth Award engulfed Y/N in a whirlwind of emotions that transported her to a distant past. She didn't expect to see Coryo at the party, as he had become a dedicated student and rarely attended social events. Nonetheless, she decided to seize the opportunity to approach him before the games, especially after glimpsing Snow's future in the hands of the mysterious woman.

Her gaze found Coryo on the other side of the room, and her heart raced. He looked different from the last time she saw him, unhinged while shooting birds in the forest. Y/N knew that if there was a chance to change the grim fate she foresaw, she would do everything in her power to save the boy. With determination, she headed towards him. Her dress, not as dazzling as four years ago, was a simple one, reflecting her current situation. Y/N no longer wanted to blend in with those people; she wanted to stand out. Her dress lacked sparkle, a simple white dress with loose sleeves. As she approached, she focused intensely on Coryo. "Y/N?" The sweetness of the sound of her name contrasted with the not-so-friendly expression in his eyes. He seemed surprised and perhaps confused by her presence.

"I thought you didn't like social situations," Y/N teased, initiating the typical banter between the two.

"I could say the same about you," Coryo retorted, displaying the familiar banter between them.

"Coryo, I wanted to wish you luck at the Plinth Award. I know how hard you fight for it." Y/N curtsied with her dress, trying to show sincerity. However, suspicion lingered in Coryo's eyes. The past few years had been marked by fights and tense interactions between the two.

It was at this moment that Clemensia Dovecote appeared next to Snow, intertwining her arm with his. An inconvenient presence that added more tension to the encounter.

"What are you doing here? Trying to win a crumb from your future president?"

"Clemensia, I don't remember addressing you," Y/N cut in, trying to maintain composure.

"Do you really think you look good today?" Clemensia mocked, laughing ironically. "You may have money, but wow, you need a stylist." Y/N, experienced in dealing with unpleasant criticisms, laughed, making it clear that such comments did not affect her.

"It seems like you're practicing to be a fashion critic now, Clemensia."

"Clemensia," Coriolanus was trying to prevent what would happen next.

"I'm just surprised that someone like you is trying to stand out. Usually, you're so... invisible," Clemensia continued, her voice dripping with superiority.

Y/N took a deep breath, trying to stay calm. "Well, it's good to change things up once in a while. And as for you, Clemensia, what brought you to the ball? Isn't it more fun spending your parents' money on ugly bags?" The provocation hit Clemensia, but she kept her composure. 

"Just enjoying what life in the Capital has to offer. Unlike some around here who seem not to fit into such luxury." Clemensia's words were sharp, and Y/N knew she was just trying to undermine her confidence. However, she wouldn't let it shake her. 

"Ah, I understand. Sometimes it's hard for some people to grasp that there's more to life than just appearances and superficialities."

Clemensia cast a disdainful look at Y/N before shrugging. "Each to their own, right? Good luck trying to get Coriolanus's attention." With that, the girl "accidentally" bumped into a waiter serving someone nearby. Three glasses of champagne landed on the white dress, leaving Y/N with a mix of feelings, from anger to the determination not to be shaken by empty provocations.

The brief interlude with Clemensia was not what Y/N expected for the night; now she was unsettled, wet, and smelling of alcohol.

It was then that Sejanus Plinth approached, interrupting the tense moment. Her plan to approach Snow that night was thwarted, but Sejanus's friendly presence brought unexpected relief.

"Y/N, you look beautiful," Sejanus complimented with a gentle smile and a small handkerchief that would at least help reduce the dress's dampness. She returned the smile, grateful for the friendly gesture.

"Dance with me?" Sejanus invited. Y/N silently agreed, accepting the offer, defeated. The awkward moment with Clemensia and the initial frustration were temporarily forgotten as she engaged in a relaxed dance among friends. 

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"It's impossible for you to be okay after what happened," Sejanus directed a compassionate look. "Who needs fashion designers when you can have an accidental stylist like Clemensia?" Y/N laughed. The echo, however, reverberated in Snow's thoughts, casting shadows over what once seemed like a complication-free night. The ball now became a complex piece of an enigma that only time would unravel.

"I don't want to ruin your outfit; it looks expensive." The girl sighed, trying to keep her distance.

"Yours does too, and Clemensia didn't think twice before trying to destroy it," Sejanus brought her closer during the dance. Y/N smiled; the altruism in the boy was evident. Even with a lot of money, he always tried to be fair and helpful to everyone around him.

While they danced, the shared glances and conspiratorial smiles between Sejanus and Y/N did not go unnoticed. Snow, watching from afar, felt an uncomfortable knot forming in his stomach. The sight of Y/N in Sejanus's arms, laughing freely, triggered a strange and unsettling sensation. In the midst of the dance, Sejanus guided Y/N with graceful skill. The lightness of the moment contrasted with the complexity of emotions unfolding in Snow's mind. He wondered if the smile Y/N shared with Sejanus was different from the one she offered him.

As the music came to an end, Sejanus and Y/N exchanged a thankful glance and bid farewell with a polite gesture. Snow, observing the friendly closeness between the two, felt a twinge of uncertainty and discomfort. 

Y/N returned to the secluded spot, and Sejanus stepped away to greet other guests. Snow, determined to overcome the uncomfortable feeling enveloping him, approached Y/N with a forced attempt at indifference.

"Apparently, you found an excellent dance partner," he commented, his eyes concealing a tension he himself tried to understand. Y/N looked at him, a playful smile playing on her lips.         

"Sejanus is a great friend. You should try dancing with him." Far from calming Snow, the response only heightened his uncertainty. The remainder of the night passed with a tense atmosphere between them, and while Y/N and Sejanus shared moments of friendship, Snow pondered the complexities of his own emotions and what the future held for him and for the girl who, even while dancing with another, remained at the center of his thoughts.

After the dance and greeting everyone, Y/N decided to leave the ballroom. She sat on a bench outside, taking off her tight shoes. She realized it was the same garden as four years ago, where her lips and Snow's touched for the first time.

"Thanks for what you said about the Plinth Award." Once again, Snow startled the girl.

"You're welcome."

"I'm sorry about the dress; it'll probably stain."

"Since when do you know about laundry?" Y/N teased.

"Tigris made me learn the hard way," Snow laughed.

"What Clemensia did wasn't cool; I'm sorry." The boy seemed sincere. A white rose on his chest drew attention in his black suit. "You look beautiful." Y/N was angry with him. Looking at him like this and knowing what would come next was driving her crazy. Coryo seemed lost; maybe there was no salvation for him despite everything.

"I know your trick," she teased, laughing. She knew, above all, that Coryo used his charm to persuade everyone. And he did it very well. "Why do you do that?"

"Do what?" Snow didn't understand where the girl was going.

"You're impossible to decipher, as if you don't want people to know what you really feel."

"Showing emotions is a sign of weakness." It was one of the things Coryo's father always said, and they repeated it to him as a child. "Feeling is a weakness. I don't allow myself to feel anything other than the feelings that keep me going." His gaze seemed somewhat dark.

Y/N looked at the starry mantle above them.

"Showing emotions makes you human, Coryo," Y/N said. "Humanity means understanding your own feelings. We need to cherish

the good emotions and keep the people who make us feel good close by, you know?" It was as if she wanted the boy to be shaped by her words. She knew it wouldn't be that easy. But it would be a good start.

"Do you have any dreams? Something you would like to make come true?"

"I'm not sure. I wish I could give a better life to the Snows. Clean our name, return to the prestige we had before the destruction of District 13. I also want to give a better future to Tigris and our Grandmother." At this point, the boy was already by her side, leaning on the railing that separated the area they were in from the small artificial stream below. "I also wish I could choose what and how much I eat." Coryo was sincere; Y/N could tell. The poverty of the Snows was not evident, Coryo disguised it well. But Tigris complained to the girl years before about how the Snow family was becoming increasingly impoverished. Whenever Y/N went to her friend's house, she brought something to eat as a silent gesture of sympathy, but she knew that she would make her friend very grateful. She couldn't and didn't want to seem sorry or supporting the friend's family. Because people would notice, and it would generate more problems than solutions. Y/N didn't know her own family's reaction either.

"It's a lot for someone who claims not to feel," Y/N teased, her eyes reflecting a playful challenge.

Coryo's lips curved into an ironic smile. "Maybe I just need the right inspiration."

Y/N laughed, feeling a surprisingly lightness in their conversation. "Inspiration, huh? If you had the chance to shape the future, how would it be?"

He stared at the starry sky, pondering her question. "Power is the answer, control over everything. But maybe... maybe a Panem where people don't have to fight for survival, where the Capitol doesn't dictate our lives." Y/N wondered if he was talking about his own survival or about the districts.

Y/N's eyes softened, witnessing a glimpse of vulnerability beneath Coryo's facade. "That sounds like a dream worth pursuing."

"And you? In this ideal Panem, what would be your role?" He asked curiously.

"I would be a storyteller," Y/N replied, laughing. "I would weave narratives of hope, resilience, and... love. I would show the world that compassion can be our greatest strength."

A genuine smile lit up Coryo's face, and for that brief moment, the differences between them dissipated. The distant music from the ballroom served as a backdrop for their conversation, a symphony accompanying the unspoken connection.

"You would do well in that role. Even though I think it would be a waste of potential since you're the SECOND-best student at the Academy," Coryo admitted, with a playful tone.

The white rose on his lapel seemed to capture the moonlight, its petals reflecting the vulnerability in his eyes. The tension that once filled the air now transformed into a shared understanding.

They were very close to each other; Y/N could smell the boy's perfume. She noticed every detail of his face to try to capture that moment in her memory. Her fingers stretched out and reached for the rose on his lapel. She detached it easily.

"Which one of us is going to steal some sweets for us to eat while we talk?"

"Do you have pockets in your dress?" The boy teased, enjoying the moment, as she placed the stolen rose on the strap of her white dress.

"No, exactly because of that, it will have to be you."

Coryo laughed as he nodded. Without saying anything else, he turned his back to the girl and disappeared into the darkness of the corridor.

Alone, Y/N wondered if the boy would come back. She was sure it was a perfect opening for him to return to the ball. She looked at the small fish swimming fast in the artificial stream below the railing. Even they were trapped. Even their freedom was controlled by the Capitol.

"Y/N."

"Coryo."

"Do you still like chocolate?" The boy asked, taking a plastic package with something like a small tart from his pocket.

"They make these especially for stealing, how can that be?" The girl amused herself while opening the small package.

As the night unfolded, the two found themselves immersed in a conversation that transcended the limitations of their tumultuous history. The garden, witness to their first kiss and now witness to their shared dreams, became a sanctuary of possibilities. And in the midst of the starry serenity, a connection, delicate but profound, began to blossom, challenging preconceived notions of their roles in a world on the brink of change. The night continued, filled with moments that defied expectations and revealed the complexity of their feelings. Y/N and Coryo's story was far from over, but in that moment, they chose to enjoy the dance under the stars, building together a new chapter of hope and possibility in a world about to change.

______________________________

Just wanted to drop a quick note to say a massive thank you for all the love, likes, comments, and follows on my story. <3

Taglist: @shari-berri @h-l-vlovesvintage @tea-bobba @daenerysqueenofhearts

Again: REQUESTS and TAGLIST ARE OPEN!!!!!

[nw39]

20 Questions Writing Edition

Tagged by @strixamans thank you for the tag, you're evil making me choose between my babies for some of these but thank you <3

How many works do you have on ao3?

12 thus far with more planned

What’s your total ao3 word count?

Long fics: 291, 919 plus probably another 50k or so in draft chapters yet to be released if not more

One shots: 36, 789

Total: 328, 708 plus the 50k or so in draft chapters

What are your top five fics by kudos?

Long fics

Bloody Soul Shadow Moons (9)

Foggy Shadows (7)

Storms, Black Velvet and Bloodied Lace (6)

Feral Soul (6)

Weeping Shadows to Bloody Wings (1)

One shots

Yuletide Mixings (13)

Harvest Time Shenanigans (9)

Grove Practice Turns Wild (5)

Mystical Love (3)

Rest of my one shots have 1 kudo

What fandoms do you write for?

BG3

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Definitely :D unless it is bots or scams, but I love getting a comment it makes my day to wake up to that email :D

What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I don't yet have a completed fic so in lieu of that my angstiest fic yet is going to be Broken Melody of Twisted Darkness however a close second would be Feral Soul. Theran goes through some shit but Kai is going to be one messed up person by the time 1492 rolls around.

Do you get hate on fics?

Haven't yet. Hopefully won't, but if I do I'll delete it and block as my fics are a safe space for people not a sounding board for the Lorrokans and the Gortashs of the world.

Do you write smut?

Oh yeah loads even in my slow burns there's eventual smut

Do you write crossovers?

No

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

No

Have you ever had a fic translated?

No

Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

No. I've done one exchange (Love in Faerûn 2025 done by the amazing @commander-krios) and one event (Kinkmas 2024 done by @shandoratheexplorer)

What’s your all time favourite ship?

This is a pre Minthara redemption arc cruel question and one I will not bloody indulge lmao

What’s the wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I plan to finish all my fics at the current moment but there are a few draft fics I'm unsure about seeing the light of AO3

What are your writing strengths?

Emotional wrecking scenes, descriptions of places or something happening like a special moment with the character(s) or event that they're experiencing or a bad one, and what's ongoing around the character etc

What are your writing weaknesses?

Sometimes I feel like I'm moving too fast in fics or that I don't always explain something well or I make typos and miss them.

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in a fic?

I do it once in a while mostly Elvish but the hardest part is making sure its as accurate as possible

First fandom you wrote for?

Baldur's Gate 3

Favourite fic you’ve ever written?

I can't choose lol

Now sharing the angst of this with @goodgirlgonebard @dramatiquechipmunk @deadly-diminuendo @verbenaa @dr-acula121 and @shandoratheexplorer

[durgesupremacy]

durge fic writing process thoughts: guilt versus shame

Write whatever you want! Headcanon your best life! And, I noticed a pattern in how I think about durge's character arc, especially because I'm currently writing an evil-to-the-end durge. No one asked for this (though asks are open!) but here it is, some rambling on how my durge(s) feeling guilt vs shame for their urges impacts whether they choose violence / stay evil.

(apparently the brand for this blog is Long Post Only)

I have a *lot* of oc durges. I'm writing Solace (they/them wood elf rogue / fighter) because they're the only one who fully pursues Gortash pre- and post-tadpole and I want to write durgetash rn. But in my weird personal multiverse of durges, the ones who were self-satisfied and confident pre-tadpole are the ones who become more "good" post-tadpole. The durges who were the most troubled pre-tadpole are more likely to do evil things, or at least be morally flexible.

Why? For me, a durge who experienced some kind of self-confidence, fulfillment, and/or pleasure during their time as a Bhaalist murder baby enters tadpole life with a seed of self-acceptance. Though they can't remember why, their amnesiac self has some preexisting inclination to like themselves for who they are and have more trust in their own judgment. They experience their urges for a second first time with enough security in themselves to reject them. They feel guilty, but they don't think this is who they are. (The internal conflict at this point is accepting their villainous past, which will be differently fun to write if I ever do it).

But a durge who moved through their Chosen of Bhaal phase with fear, insecurity, and/or low self-worth enters tadpole life with vestiges of self-loathing. Their broken brain leaned into traumatic rewiring, and when they re-encounter their urges they're predisposed towards self-hate and identify with the urges instead of challenging or rejecting them. Being Bad makes more intuitive sense to them than being, idk, Good with a Serious Problem. Something is wrong with them. They feel shame.

But without their memories, they don't really know why. Depending on party composition they can get praised and rewarded for the things they feel ashamed of. And in time, they realize they don't have to feel shame - after all, it's their reaction. They can react differently. If they stop fighting their "true nature" they can finally enjoy themselves. They'll even get rewarded for it and more or less have what they need to survive. (There's a whole other point of analysis here on companion interactions and community vs isolation, I can write that at some point if we're into it).

Ultimately, my post-tadpole self-loathing villain-arc durge is tempted not just by the urges, but by not feeling bad about themselves. Without their memories of who they were and why they should feel ashamed of that, they have the freedom to indulge in their worst traits. It might look like self-acceptance, but it's not. They just stopped caring about anything and followed the dopamine. And the more they give in to their "true self," the more inevitable it seems to them that their only path towards meaning and worth is through Bhaal. (At least it makes Solace go perfectly with Gortash. Misery doesn't love company so much as it hates being alone).

I guess this feels worth saying because I've seen nuanced discussion about durge's capacity for redemption, but the evil arc for durge seems mostly like them leaning into misc Bhaalist insanity and/or being very comfortable in their evil. I'm curious about (and enjoying) writing an evil durge that's less unhinged and is experiencing more relatable emotional arcs, even when we can't relate to their stabbing. Hopefully.

Stay tuned for more rambling

[designerairway0]

001 - the Other who does not belong to this world.

some blabla about henry creel and why I love him •́ . •̀

001 is neither understood nor does he understand the rules governing this world. He is a young deity, his own redemption. With a naive and straightforward cruelty, he softens gruesome and brutal scenes into poetry. He is beautiful, frighteningly enchanting. He is also bad, bad without needing a reason, like the lament of an angel strangled by the halo, struggling in its final moments before shattering into a wasteland. The fragmented scenes from episodes five to seven of Stranger Things subtly imply the pain that 001 has or is currently experiencing, unrecognized by others. From the frequent use of the word 'control' when he mentioned Papa to having his identity erased and becoming an experiment, to being stripped of power and turned into an orderly, then to being punished and electrocuted until he was dragged out of the control room unconscious... His vulnerability doesn't need an obvious explosive presentation; it just requires calmly and patiently narrating the story. Jamie's control and interpretation of emotions show us this slow tearing sensation.

Besides the fragmented scenes, the audience's understanding of 001 is also voyeuristic. When electrocuted, only a glimpse of his blonde hair is visible, so gentle yet so violent. He embodies too many contradictions, making you wonder whether breaking him and reshaping him makes him sexier or stripping away another layer of his disguise makes him sexier. When he talks with 11 about the 'memory that makes you sad and angry', when he transcends the human form, all these moments make you want to rediscover his vulnerability and you will continuously expect his more beautiful chaotic and surprising twists. This is why I love him so much.

[ota-division]

Chinami's Thoughts on Kumamoto Division

Aoba Yamamura

In the tranquil stillness of her home, Chinami prepares for the ritual of divination. Her son Jin plays quietly in the corner, his innocent laughter a gentle melody in the background. The room is dimly lit, save for the soft glow of candles that cast dancing shadows upon the walls. Chinami’s sisters, Kira and Taria, are elsewhere, their presence felt but not seen, allowing her the solitude necessary for her practice.

She sits at an aged wooden table, worn smooth by years of use. Before her rests the crystal ball, an orb of mysteries waiting to be unveiled. Chinami takes a deep breath, centering herself, her thoughts clearing like the sky after a storm. She reaches out, her fingers brushing against the cool surface of the crystal, a conduit to the lives of those she seeks to understand.

With a final glance at Jin, a silent promise of protection and love, Chinami takes a deep breathe and lets the visions come to her. The crystal ball becomes her window to the souls of the team known as Strange Magic, each member’s story ready to unfold beneath her perceptive gaze.

"Yamamura Aoba."

The Past: Chinami’s crystal ball reveals a childhood where the seeds of Aoba’s complex relationship with fire were sown. The burn marks from his mother, the nurturing guidance of his father, and the tragic loss that followed are all etched deeply into his being. His father’s death, a catalyst for Aoba’s descent into darkness, ignited a flame of vengeance that led him to exact retribution on those responsible. These events, coupled with the betrayal and manipulation he experienced in his youth, fractured his world, leaving him to seek solace in the destructive beauty of flames.

The Present: In the present, Aoba stands as a man of duality. By day, he is the custodian of knowledge, a librarian whose love for books is a fortress against the chaos of his emotions. By night, he dons the mantle of 'Bluefire,' where his pyromania becomes an outlet for the pain and instability that threaten to consume him. His acts of terrorism, though a cry for stability, are a dangerous dance with madness, a temporary balm for the wounds that time has yet to heal.

The Future: The future holds a precarious balance for Aoba. The crystal ball shimmers with the potential for healing or further descent into turmoil. His leadership within the Kumamoto Division offers a glimmer of hope, a chance to channel his tumultuous emotions into the art of rap. Yet, the threat of his mind’s complete fragmentation looms large. The path ahead is fraught with challenges, but also opportunities for redemption and the possibility of finding peace amidst the ashes of his past.

Kunio "Kurome" Chōten

"Chōten Kunio."

The Past: The crystal ball reveals a young Kunio, born into the opulence of Aoyama, yet feeling the suffocating grip of its expectations. His spirit rebels against the shallow values of the upper class, seeking authenticity among the streets and the arts. The ball shows the strain between Kunio and his brother Tomi, a bond tested and torn by the actions of their parents. His exile, though painful, becomes a liberation, leading him to the vibrant stages of Kumamoto and the companionship of Aoba and Natsume.

The Present: Chinami's crystal ball now focuses on Kunio's current life, where his vibrant persona as the 'smiling nobleman' captivates the hearts of Kumamoto. His love for the performing arts is not just a career but a declaration of his freedom from the shackles of Aoyama's elite. Yet, this same passion fuels his alter-ego 'Hollow,' a shadowy figure who seeks to dismantle the very foundations of the society he despises. His actions, though veiled in secrecy, are driven by a deep-seated need for retribution—a response to the betrayal and abandonment he felt at the hands of his family.

The Future: Peering into the future, the crystal ball reveals a path of both light and shadow for Kunio. His role in the Kumamoto Division alongside his closest allies, Aoba and Natsume, offers a chance for redemption and the creation of a legacy far removed from his birthright. Yet, the ball also shimmers with the darker hues of revenge, suggesting that his quest to settle scores with his family, especially his brother Tomi, may lead to a dramatic confrontation. The future is uncertain—will Kunio find solace in his art and companionship, or will the ghosts of his past compel him to a final act of defiance?

Natsume Kurome

"Kurome Natsume."

The Past: The crystal ball reveals a childhood marked by vivid dreams and premonitions, a gift that sets Natsume apart from an early age. His mother’s teachings of the tarot and his father’s encouragement of his artistic pursuits shape him into a multifaceted individual. Yet, this same gift becomes a burden when his mother succumbs to madness, an event that leaves a deep scar on Natsume’s heart. His journey through the world of art and his embrace of fashion and paganism are steps on a path to self-discovery, leading him to find solace in the expressive freedom of the performing arts.

The Present: In the present, Natsume stands as a beacon of beauty and mystery in Kumamoto, his store ‘The Pandora Box’ a haven for those seeking art and foresight. His flirtatious charm and enigmatic aura draw people to him, yet it’s his kindness and protective nature, especially towards Aoba and Kunio, that truly define him. His talent for reading people serves him well both as a fortune teller and an artist, his work reflecting the depth of his soul.

The Future: The future is a canvas awaiting Natsume's brush. The crystal ball shimmers with the promise of artistic triumphs and the deepening bonds of love and friendship. Yet, it also holds shadows of his past actions, the poisoner ‘Semiramis’ lurking within. His role in the Kumamoto Division, alongside Aoba and Kunio, is a chance for redemption and the creation of a legacy that transcends the pain of his history.

Strange Magic

As always, Chinami lays each of the 52 cards in her deck face down, preparing to let destiny decide which card will determine the true face of each member of this strange, yet intriguing division. Within a minute, three of the 52 cards are flipped face up, revealing them.

Aoba Yamamura - The Tower: For Aoba, ‘Bluefire,’ the card drawn is The Tower, symbolizing upheaval, the revelation of deeper truths, and the breaking down of existing structures. His life has been marked by dramatic changes and disruptions, much like the lightning that strikes The Tower. This card also represents a potential for enlightenment and liberation following a period of chaos, mirroring Aoba’s transformation through his trials.

Kunio Chōten - The Magician: The Magician is chosen for Kunio, representing resourcefulness, power, and the ability to manifest one’s desires. Kunio’s theatrical flair and his capacity to captivate audiences align with The Magician’s mastery over the elements. This card also signifies the convergence of the spiritual and material realms, reflecting Kunio’s journey from the constraints of his upbringing to the freedom of the stage.

Natsume Kurome - The Star: For Natsume, The Star is the perfect match, a symbol of hope, inspiration, and serenity. It reflects his role as a beacon of beauty and artistic talent in Kumamoto. The Star also represents healing and renewal, which resonates with Natsume’s recovery from his mother’s attack and his subsequent growth into a beloved fortune teller and artist.

The High Points: Chinami sees the good in each member’s life. For Aoba, the high point came after the darkest period of his life, when the loss of his father and the subsequent spiral into chaos nearly consumed him. His rebirth as ‘Bluefire’ marked a turning point, where he channeled his pain into a force for change, leading him to take the helm of Strange Magic and find a semblance of purpose amidst the turmoil.

Kunio’s moment of transformation occurred when he was exiled from Aoyama. This event, though initially a source of pain, became his liberation, freeing him from the constraints of his birthright. It allowed him to fully embrace his passion for the performing arts and eventually led him to find love and companionship with Natsume and Aoba, solidifying his role as a key member of Strange Magic.

And lastly, Natsume’s turning point was the tragic loss of his mother, which propelled him into a journey of self-discovery through art and fortune-telling. Opening ‘The Pandora Box’ and marrying Kunio were milestones that not only showcased his talents but also brought stability and love into his life, fortifying his place within Strange Magic.

The Team's Future: As a collective, Strange Magic’s destiny shifted when they came together to form their Division. Their individual high points converged, creating a synergy that amplified their talents and allowed them to support each other’s growth. The future holds the promise of their combined strengths leading them to new heights in the Division Rap Battle and beyond. Will their revolution come to fruition? Or is it doomed to be destroyed before it ever starts? Only time will tell...

[sareisnot]

Wall-E: The Best and Worst of Humanity on Display

For a children’s movie, Wall-E presents quite a dim prospect for humanity. Its two major settings, that being the ruined, trash filled earth, and the hyper-capitalist, hedonistic nightmare of the Axiom cruise ship, serve as quite blunt criticisms of modern society’s current trajectory. It anticipates a future in which our capitalistic systems propel towards our worst, most wasteful instincts, and reduce the planet to such a state that the best solution the corporatocratic government can come up with is, “just get out of dodge before it gets worse.” But old habits die hard, as the large-scale apathy, lethargy, and alienation seen on the Axiom proves. In WALL-E's very pointed opinion, our current practices, and the systems that foster those practices, only serve to further distance us from our humanity, preventing us from experiencing the true joys of life, and rejecting fulfillment for convenience.

The film’s thesis statement can be found in the words of the Axiom’s captain: “That’s all anyone on this blasted ship has ever done…I don’t want to survive! I wanna LIVE!” To simply pursue what best fosters your existence, the film says, is no way to move through life, at least not without sacrificing a bit of yourself on the way. Every character who helps WALL-E and EVE along, be they human or robot, has chosen to act on their emotional wants, rather than their objective drives. M-O and the other robots stray from their programming to help the couple, the Captain rejects Auto’s doctrine of survival, and even the gigantic WALL-A's stop collecting trash for a moment, to provide the heroes with some light. But in this universe, pursuing fulfillment is to fight against the tide. In this exaggerated version of our current capitalist, commercialized, proto-dystopia, there is no place for emotional drive, because it hinders practicality. At its core, WALL-E is a warning, that if we continue to chase this toxic instinct, then we will inevitably be relegated to a species of glorified dopamine receptors.

Despite this rather dreary warning, the film still maintains a boundless optimism. As a matter of fact, the film is bursting with hope, positivity, and most prominently, love. The film's emotional core, that being relationship between WALL-E and EVE, is also where one can find humanity's most redemptive quality: connection. The relationships that we forge, and the meaningful interactions that we have with others, are where the spirit of humanity is defined and fostered. All throughout the film, WALL-E and EVE, through their love, continuously bring humanity out of each other. At one point, EVE tosses away the plant, which had served as the film's primary motivator up to then, to communicate that she refuses to leave WALL-E behind. Their connection has inspired her to reject what is objectively best and choose love. This kind of choice is eventually what saves WALL-E, as EVE restores his unique personality in the end with a “kiss.” It is only through their love and connection that they find the motivation to finally return the plant and chart a course back to earth, saving humanity from slow decline. It is the culmination of the films several moments in which connection, compassion, and love are the motivators. “Define Dancing,” arguably the film’s most stunning scene, features WALL-E and EVE dancing with each other in space, for no other reason than to enjoy each other's company, and the life they have been granted. In turn, witnessing this scene is what causes John and Mary, the secondary human couple, to meet each other, and continue a dual arc of rediscovering their agency, which is initially sparked by WALL-E, but is maintained by their connection. WALL-E inspires EVE, who inspires The Captain, who inspires the rest of humanity, and eventually leads them back to their home. It is through this web of knock-on effects, the film states, that we can recover from even the direst of circumstances. We can never fully lose this aspect of humanity, even as we tread further into the seemingly inhuman future, because it is a quintessential, necessary part of our fundamental being. If connection is possible, the human spirit will endure, even if there are no more humans to carry it.

[brainlessandconfused]

The universe works in weird ways

I was rereading my last post and laughed at a few things I said. I was recalling a situationship that I had recently gotten out of, and now that it has officially been a full year since then, I feel as if my perspective has changed. This digital diary will be the perfect place to catch these changes and reflect the reality of human emotion.

Moving on: Graduate school kept me booked and busy, and I truly did start to separate myself from this individual. I removed them from my locations and stopped talking to them completely. I had prepared myself to never see this person again, as I truly believe the universe will stop letting you see someone once their role in your life is done. This concept felt real, as I would be in the same places as them, yet never run into them once. It was over in my head, but I knew my heart still craved a love that I never got. It hurt. When asked about my current state, I would always describe how much I have grown and how this person is no longer relevant, but deep inside, there was a tiny hole that I still could not repair, despite the whole year of no contact.

The Universe: I just graduated from grad school two weeks ago and decided to take a vacation. The vacation spot I chose was the same place I had gone with them last year, but my intention this time around was redemption. To have a better time than I did last time. No strings attached, just go have fun and not look back at this place with fear, but with fun. But as I said, the universe works in weird ways. Well and behold, I run into the very person I was trying to forget while I was on vacation. We had no idea that the other person would be there, yet our intentions were the same...forget and rewrite what happened.

We both were so shocked, I honestly could not believe my eyes. My heart was pounding, and my brain was trying to calculate how this coincidence was humanly possible. It was not like everything I had learned this past year went out the door, but my mind did go blank for a second. In the end, I felt that I was ready to be kind and gentle, regardless of the hurt I went through and experienced again just by seeing them. We ended up talking and catching up, and rehashing a much-needed conversation the next day. It was so fascinating the way they described our story. To me, they were always so uninvolved, uninterested, and had no respect for me or my time. But to them, they spoke of me with such adoration and described the pain that they felt having lost me for so long. They apologized for the hurt they caused and asked for a chance to reconnect again. I was confused. How could we both live the same things, yet have such different experiences?

I don't know why the universe sent them back to me. I felt there was a level of closure that I needed in how I wasn't crazy. I truly did feel that there was something there, but it also opened up a whole new can of worms. What are we now? Why did we need to see each other again? Was this a temporary meeting for a more permanent end? All I know for now is that I am taking it slow. The pain I live with causes me to live cautiously and to guard my heart, and there are still many things that need to be said. I hope that later I will see the true meaning and lesson of this encounter.

Signing off,

Brainless and Confused

[second-breakfast-fics]

The Flesh Is Weak

The introductions of my characters and content warnings for my story

Summary:

Set within the cold stone walls of a medieval monastery, this story traces the slow unraveling of three men bound by faith and fractured by desire. Father Wilhelm, once a beacon of sanctity, now bears the weight of secret sins and unrelenting guilt. Brother Aurelian, rigid in his devotion, lashes out in cruelty to smother the chaos within. And Brother Matthias, caught between innocence and longing, becomes the silent sacrifice in their holy tragedy. Through rituals, repression, and revelations, the sacred becomes grotesque—and salvation, a haunting impossibility.

Themes: Religious trauma, internalized homophobia, spiritual decay, and the blurred line between sanctity and suffering.

---

Trigger/Content Warnings:

Religious trauma and indoctrination

Homophobia and internalized shame

Graphic depictions of medieval torture and ritualized violence

Sexual repression and forbidden desire

Emotional and physical abuse within a religious setting

Themes of guilt, martyrdom, and psychological deterioration

Power dynamics and manipulation under the guise of faith

[TW: self harm]

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽OC☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

Quote:

"Forgive me, Father, for I have not ceased to sin—even in thought."

Name: Father Wilhelm

Nicknames: The Bleeding Priest, Wilhelm the Penitent

Age: 34

Gender: Male

Birthday: November 5

Pronouns: He/Him

Place of Origin: A remote monastic village in the Bavarian Alps

Current Residence: An isolated chapel nestled deep within a cursed forest

Accent: Germanic Latin-inflected

Sexuality: Repressed homosexual

Relationship Status: Celibate (by vow and torment)

Fandom: Original / Dark Medieval Fantasy of The Flesh Is Weak

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Hair Color: Jet black

Height: 6’1”

Eye Color: Ice blue

Scars: Numerous self-inflicted lash marks and blade cuts, mainly across his face, chest, and arms

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Physical Illnesses/Disabilities: Chronic pain from infection-prone wounds, nerve damage in hands

Mental Illnesses: Religious OCD (scrupulosity), PTSD, severe depression, masochistic delusions

Drugs: None

Smoke: Incense only

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Dislikes: His own flesh, lustful thoughts, laughter in holy places, fhe softness of silk and mirrors

Likes: Gregorian chants, the smell of blood and frankincense, rain against stained glass, quiet penance and he sound of bones breaking in martyrdom stories

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Food: Plain bread dipped in wine

Drink: Consecrated wine (only during mass)

Color: Ash grey

Animal: Crow

Number: 7 (for the deadly sins)

Holiday: All Souls' Day

Season: Late autumn

Type of Art: Gothic iconography depicting martyrdom and divine wrath

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Backstory:

Father Wilhelm was once a devoted scholar of theology, raised in the cold stone walls of a secluded monastery. As a child prodigy, he was adored by the clergy—until he began experiencing what they called "unclean temptations." Instead of support, Wilhelm was indoctrinated into self-punishment rituals to "cleanse his soul." This cycle of guilt and pain warped his view of faith, binding pleasure to suffering.

Now an ordained priest, Wilhelm serves in isolation, convinced that through self-inflicted torment, he can absorb the sins of others and earn redemption. He believes every wound he carves is a prayer, every drop of blood a psalm. Haunted by visions he believes are divine punishments, he walks the line between saint and sinner, never certain which side he truly serves.

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽OC☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

Quote:

"To cast out sin, one must carve it from the flesh."

Name: Brother Aurelian

Nicknames: The Warden, God's Flame

Age: 38

Gender: Male

Birthday: February 11

Pronouns: He/Him

Place of Origin: A monastic orphanage near Rouen, France

Current Residence: Saint Enoch's Abbey

Accent: Harsh and clipped Old Norman Latin

Sexuality: Repressed / Denial (latent desires buried under fanaticism)

Relationship Status: Celibate, though obsessed with Brother Matthias

Fandom: Original / Historical Dark Fiction

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Hair Color: Ash brown

Height: 6’2”

Eye Color: Steel blue

Scars: Flagellation wounds across his back; burns on hands from holding hot coals in "purification"

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Physical Illnesses: Chronic nerve damage

Mental Illnesses: Religious OCD, delusions of grandeur, sadomasochism

Drugs: None

Smoke: Occasionally as part of purification rites

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Dislikes: Joyful expressions, homosexuality (as he was taught to define it), kindness mistaken for weakness and dreams

Likes: The silence after a cry, cold stone under bare feet, fasting and control

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Food: Boiled lentils and water

Drink: Bitter herbal tinctures

Color: Blood red

Animal: Vulture

Number: 1 (for unity with God alone)

Holiday: Lent

Season: Winter

Type of Art: Manuscript marginalia depicting damnation

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Backstory:

Raised within rigid dogma, Aurelian rose through monastic ranks by strict adherence and discipline. He believes pain is the only path to divine closeness. When he discovered Brother Matthias’s secret desires, it awakened something buried within him—rage, obsession, and a mirrored temptation. Instead of confronting himself, he projects that sin onto Matthias, becoming his punisher, his confessor, his jailor in all but name.

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽OC☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

Quote:

"I love Him. I love you. If that is sin, let me never be saved."

Name: Brother Matthias

Nicknames: The Lamb, The Quiet One

Age: 19

Gender: Male

Birthday: April 7

Pronouns: He/Him

Place of Origin: A poor village in northern England

Current Residence: Saint Enoch's Abbey

Accent: Gentle Northern English Latin

Sexuality: Gay

Relationship Status: Unrequited love toward Brother Aurelian

Fandom: Original / Historical Dark Fiction

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Hair Color: Dark brown

Height: 5’9”

Eye Color: golden hazel

Scars: Fingernail marks on his palms, lashes on his back, bruises on his ribs

✩.･:｡≻───── ⋆✞⋆ ─────.•:｡✩

Physical Illnesses: Malnutrition, anemia

Mental Illnesses: Depression, religious trauma, internalized homophobia

Drugs: None

Smoke: No

✩.･:｡≻───── ⋆✞⋆ ─────.•:｡✩

Dislikes: His reflection, the confessional, the cold after punishment and hope (but he still clings to it)

Likes: Illuminated texts, touch (even if it's painful), Aurelian’s voice when it's soft and humming hymns alone

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Food: Honeyed bread (a stolen memory from childhood)

Drink: Warm milk

Color: Pale gold

Animal: Dove

Number: 3 (for the trinity, which he recites like a spell for comfort)

Holiday: Easter (hope and resurrection)

Season: Spring

Type of Art: Frescoes of angels, flawed and cracked

✩.･:｡≻───── ⋆✞⋆ ─────.•:｡✩

Backstory:

A gentle soul drawn to faith for refuge, not power. He joined the abbey seeking peace but was marked early for his softness and beauty. Brother Aurelian, once a source of safety, became both tormentor and obsession. Matthias confesses daily—his desires, his thoughts, his dreams—all laid bare to the man who hurts him "for God."

Yet, through every wound and whispered prayer, Matthias still believes there is redemption—not just for himself, but for Aurelian too.

[maximuswolf]

What to play next after expedition 33

What to play next after expedition 33 Hi everyone below is the list of games i have played and i liked , i just now finished expedition 33 and loved it , can u guys recommend what game to play next ? 🟢 10/10 – Peak Experiences Days Gone – Loved the emotional journey, characters, and pacing. Resident Evil series (up to Village) – Horror-action perfection. Cyberpunk 2077 – Deep worldbuilding, immersive storytelling. Telltale’s The Walking Dead – Best emotional storytelling I’ve experienced. Clair Obscur Expedition 33 – Emotional ending and peak graphics made me tear up 🟢 9.5–9.9/10 – Almost Perfect Elden Ring – Incredible world, rewarding exploration. Detroit: Become Human – Branching narrative with emotional choices. 🟢 9/10 – Games I Loved The Last of Us Part I & II – Emotional, cinematic, unforgettable. God of War (2018) – Masterclass in storytelling and combat. God of War: Ragnarok – Deep, polished continuation. Call of Duty (up to Black Ops 2) – Strong campaigns, emotional moments. Uncharted series – Great balance of story, action, and humor. Ghost of Tsushima – Beautifully written with a powerful ending. A Plague Tale: Innocence – Powerful sibling bond and atmosphere. Until Dawn – Cinematic horror done right. The Quarry – Fun, immersive, and choice-driven. Outlast 1 – Pure tension and psychological horror. Outlast 2 – Dark, disturbing, but emotionally gripping. Silent Hill 2 – Didn’t like the puzzle-heavy gameplay, but still enjoyed it. 🟡 8.5–8.9/10 – Really Good Alan Wake 1 & 2 – Great atmosphere, mysterious and engaging. Hellblade: Senua’s Sacrifice – Psychological intensity, great sound design. Wukong – Visually stunning, satisfying combat. Expedition 33 (currently playing) – Getting emotional vibes, loving it so far. 🟡 8/10 – Good, Not Amazing Star Wars Jedi: Fallen Order – Solid, but the puzzles annoyed me. Marvel’s Spider-Man (both games) – Fun, but didn’t emotionally click. 🔴 0/10 – Not My Thing Horizon Zero Dawn – Couldn’t connect at all. Red Dead Redemption 2 – Too slow for my taste.  Submitted June 22, 2025 at 09:33AM by noobnotpronolser https://ift.tt/geEJt9M via /r/gaming

[foreclosuresolutions]

Loan Modification Services That Can Rescue Your Mortgage Just in Time

Introduction

In the increasingly volatile landscape of personal finance, homeownership — once a symbol of stability — has become vulnerable to economic headwinds. Unexpected hardships such as job loss, medical emergencies, or mounting debt can swiftly derail even the most well-structured mortgage repayment plans. When monthly payments begin to slip out of reach, panic sets in. But there’s hope. For homeowners standing at the precipice of foreclosure, loan modification services emerge as a beacon of relief, offering a structured path to redemption and housing security.

Understanding Loan Modification Services

A loan modification isn’t merely a refinancing plan or a temporary forbearance. It is a permanent restructuring of your existing mortgage terms. The objective? To make the loan more affordable and sustainable. By reducing the interest rate, extending the repayment term, or even rolling the delinquent payments into the loan balance, loan modification services allow struggling homeowners to reclaim financial equilibrium without sacrificing their home.

Unlike refinancing, which requires a new loan (often with stringent credit requirements), loan modification is an adjustment to the original contract. It’s crafted around the borrower’s current financial status — tailored, deliberate, and ideally, life-saving. The loan modification process begins with a thorough analysis of the borrower’s hardship, income, and the feasibility of repayment under altered conditions. Lenders are often more willing to entertain such adjustments than to plunge into the lengthy and expensive foreclosure proceedings.

The Impending Threat of Foreclosure

Foreclosure is more than a legal procedure — it’s an emotional upheaval. It tarnishes credit scores, disrupts families, and dismantles the very notion of stability. In New Jersey, where foreclosure activity has seen periodic surges, distressed homeowners are actively seeking options to stop foreclosure in NJ before irreversible damage is done.

The legal complexities and deadlines involved in foreclosure cases can be overwhelming. Delinquent borrowers often feel paralyzed, not knowing where to turn. Fortunately, solutions like loan modification services or Deed in Lieu of Foreclosure nj services offer structured, viable alternatives to losing one’s home.

How the Loan Modification Process Works

Navigating the loan modification process requires precision, documentation, and often, professional guidance. It typically unfolds in a few stages:

Hardship Letter Submission — The borrower submits a formal letter explaining the reasons for financial difficulty. Loss of income, illness, divorce, or unexpected expenses are among acceptable causes.

Financial Disclosure — Documentation of income, expenses, tax returns, bank statements, and debt obligations is critical. This forms the basis upon which the lender evaluates affordability.

Trial Period Plan — If initial assessments are favorable, lenders may offer a trial payment period, often lasting three months. The borrower must make these payments on time to demonstrate capability.

Final Agreement — Upon successful completion of the trial, a permanent modification is recorded, recalibrating the loan in terms of reduced interest, extended term, or re-amortization.

This meticulous process, when guided by experienced professionals, can serve as a lifeline, especially for those who aim to stop foreclosure NJ before legal escalation.

Deed in Lieu of Foreclosure: A Compassionate Exit

For some, despite best efforts, retaining the home may not be feasible. That’s when Deed in Lieu of Foreclosure services come into play. This alternative allows the homeowner to voluntarily transfer ownership of the property back to the lender in exchange for release from mortgage obligations. It’s less damaging to credit than foreclosure and halts all legal actions, including eviction.

The Deed in Lieu of Foreclosure process typically involves:

A formal application initiated by the borrower

A review of market value to ensure no significant second liens exist

Surrender of keys and documentation upon approval

Waiver of deficiency balances in many cases

While surrendering one’s home is never easy, this dignified solution can preserve financial standing and allow a fresh start, especially when other alternatives to foreclosure have been exhausted.

Alternatives to Foreclosure: Diversified Solutions for Diverse Needs

Foreclosure prevention is not a one-size-fits-all endeavor. There are numerous alternatives to foreclosure that cater to the unique contours of each borrower’s financial crisis. These include:

Repayment Plans: For short-term financial hiccups, lenders may allow you to catch up on missed payments over time without modifying the loan.

Forbearance Agreements: Temporary relief where the lender agrees to reduce or suspend payments for a specific period.

Short Sale: Selling the property for less than the outstanding mortgage balance, with lender approval.

Bankruptcy: While a last resort, Chapter 13 can temporarily stop foreclosure in New Jersey, allowing a court-ordered repayment plan.

However, among all these strategies, loan modification services remain the most sustainable and long-term solution for those who still wish to retain ownership and avoid drastic financial consequences.

The Critical Role of Timing

In foreclosure cases, timing is paramount. Every day lost brings one closer to legal filings, sheriff sales, and displacement. That’s why acting promptly — before notices pile up — is crucial. Seeking professional help at the earliest hint of default can dramatically increase the likelihood of a successful loan modification process or a more favorable Deed in Lieu of Foreclosure process.

Too often, borrowers fall into the trap of denial. Hoping the situation will magically correct itself, they let weeks turn into months. But procrastination is foreclosure’s silent ally. Engaging in available loan modification services while your account is still in early delinquency stages can tilt the scales toward retention rather than repossession.

Why Loan Modification Services Matter

What sets loan modification services apart is their ability to balance the interests of both borrower and lender. They reflect an evolved understanding of the economic climate — one that accommodates human unpredictability. These services acknowledge that financial distress does not equate to irresponsibility. Instead, it opens a doorway for structured support, negotiation, and resolution.

They are also rooted in legal legitimacy. Under federal initiatives and state-specific laws, including protections to stop foreclosure in New Jersey, lenders are often required to consider modifications before initiating legal proceedings. This adds a layer of security for borrowers who act decisively.

The Emotional Toll and the Promise of Relief

Behind every mortgage is a family, a dream, and years of hard-earned investment. The looming threat of foreclosure casts a long, heavy shadow. Anxiety, sleepless nights, and the gnawing dread of losing one’s sanctuary can take a psychological toll that’s as devastating as the financial one.

By initiating the loan modification process, homeowners reclaim a measure of control. It’s not just about numbers — it’s about peace of mind, dignity, and survival. For those who can no longer viably hold on, turning to Deed in Lieu of Foreclosure services offers a way out without the stigma of foreclosure branding their credit history for years to come.

Looking Ahead: A Path to Resilience

The terrain of mortgage distress may be harrowing, but it is navigable. Whether through targeted loan modification services, an organized Deed in Lieu of Foreclosure process, or exploring other alternatives to foreclosure, there exists a roadmap out of financial despair. That path begins with awareness, action, and alignment with professionals who understand both the technical and human dimensions of foreclosure.

New Jersey homeowners, in particular, have a robust legal environment supporting efforts to stop foreclosure NJ. Leveraging these protections through proper channels can mark the difference between ruin and recovery.

Source URL - https://medium.com/@theforeclosuresolutionsnj/loan-modification-services-that-can-rescue-your-mortgage-just-in-time-3f4546a2c0f9

[lightcreators]

"My, fate has been awfully cruel to you, has it not?" - Oei / Lelouch

@diverse-hearts-ocs

He doesn’t even know where to start for answer back.

About how he gets his childhood destroyed by the moment his father caused his sister’s accident, removed her of sight during so many years? About how he has been pulled as a politic hostage inside another country, disgraced as the prince he was, in which his nice family decided to settled down inside say country, and oh, destroyed it, and turned it inside a dominated place when actual members of the society were turned into numbers, with their own culture considered as illegal ? How useless his life had sounded until he got the power to pull a difference? How tragic everything has been, since he merely been a piece of a game since the start?

It wasn’t a part he was speaking with someone else, not even since he started travelling around for the sake to proving his human perspective in front of a divinity, in front of the God of the Underworld … which caused actually, another dimension of that another fate. Coming from his own chessboard, as much dramatics has been for him, as much he ended up sacrificing his life in exchange of peace and generated an unseen miracle, damages he caused on his best friend cannot be forgotten. Because of him, he loses a love that could have blossomed on something majestic, an opportunity of his sister to raise a utopia, as inevitable temporary and dreamily it would have looked like, until he had to renounce to his own identity for the sake of his chessboard, the sake of a legacy, for twisting one last time circumstance who happened previously. It has been his redemption mark upon his chessboard, as much, no matter how large the sacrifice was, it wouldn’t never remove the blood he had on his hands coming from his own sister.

He even less wanted to talk about the kid without some kind of context. If he fucked up badly with Suzaku, with Alois Trancy, it has been another dimension. It has been the manipulator been manipulated the whole fucking time. It has been the pride facing real sincere parental emotions but embracing it too late.

❝ Fates never stopped to laugh at my face, I’m sure they currently doing exactly that. Cruelty came along one single word : irony. How ironic the situation can be, from distance, entire circumstance is truly laughable, and becoming entraining player of a game in which I have no control of … Whatever fragment of control I think I must have, eventually, I will learn that I was just another toy inside someone’s else hands, and whatever what could describe me as a human being didn’t matter in the long way. My feelings, how I might be different about impression I gave to myself --- ❞ He didn’t usually expressing so much truths, nevertheless, coming from another irony he experienced, he preferred spoke as he was talking with that witch, although there was consciousness they were just shared the same face … and coming from his experience with Hades, and temporary sensations around that kid, preferred avoiding himself the trouble to annoying an entity he shouldn’t have on her wrong side. ❝ I have been cruel, and have sown such seeds, for all my goodness, I could only hope that it would come back to haunt me, couldn't I ? To complain about the cruelty of existence when I myself have rejected a redemption that has been offered to me, I can only complain to myself. I am not hypocritical enough to pretend to be the innocent lamb when I could still act like a wolf if circumstances demanded it. ❞ An self-mocking laugh escaped his lips. ❝ Though, I appreciate your empathy. ❞

[redjadethewriter]

I'm Mourning Isha... Poor Jinx: Arcane Season 2 Act 2

I am truly fixated on Arcane this month. This coming Saturday marks the release of Act 3 of Season 2, and I am eagerly anticipating what will unfold. The beauty of it all lies in the uncertainty; I have no clue what to expect. The events of Act 2 with Isha caught me completely off guard. I mean, seriously, who saw that coming? It was a curveball unlike any other. However, amidst the surprising twists, there were several standout moments, particularly Jinx’s redemption arc. She has truly emerged as the hero of this season. Contrary to popular belief, she was technically the hero of the first season as well. Let’s not forget that Piltover has been oppressive towards Zaun for far too long. The economic inequality between the two cities has driven Zaun to its current state, and the council of Piltover has been corrupted to its core. I firmly stand by this allegation. Zaun’s people have suffered immensely at the hands of the elite, breathing in poison daily…literally. Because of the exploitation, they have been forced into criminal activities and violence just to survive, leaving innocent children like Vi and Powder to endure the consequences. Their current circumstances directly result from this toxic environment.

In season one, Powder aka Jinx blasted the Piltover Tower, which many considered being a fair act…meaning me. I was skipping with joy to that scene. Additionally, Jinx and Sevika’s actions of pushing the gray back up through the vents into Piltover marked the beautiful beginning of a revolution. You can’t get any better than painting the city in colors. This revolution was progressing in Act 2, as certain people started coloring their hair blue and dressing like Jinx. However, the missing piece of this revolution was Jinx herself, who cultivated a softer life by having fun with Isha and embracing her inner Powder. During episodes 4 through 6, I had the opportunity to witness a completely different side of Jinx. It seemed like she had overcome her attacks for a while, showing that the inner voices, including Silco, were no longer causing chaos in her mind.

Allow me to share with you my favorite scene, the one that I simply can’t get enough of.

In episode 4, when Isha was taken by the enforcers and Sevika went to inform Jinx while injured and without her toy arm, Jinx experienced a mental attack. I appreciated the minor details of Sevika, remaining on her knees, not saying anything more to fuel the situation, while Jinx struggled to regain control. Eventually, Jinx could ground herself and calm down. And together, they embarked on a mission to break into the prison and rescue Isha. As a result, not only were the Jinxers, the Firelights, and other Zaunites set free, but it was also heartwarming to see Isha cry and hug Jinx upon their reunion. Unfortunately, their emotional moment was interrupted by the enforcers barging into their location. However, Warwick, the beastly wolfman, arrived and began attacking the enforcers. I was deeply moved when Jinx glanced at Isha and then Sevika, instructing Sevika to “Get her out.”

Sevika swiftly lifted Isha with one arm, clasping the little girl, and rushed into the cell with her. Meanwhile, Jinx engaged in a fierce battle with Warwick, luring him towards the back of the section so that Sevika could escape with Isha. Witnessing Isha crying and reaching out as she watched the epic battle unfold was heart-wrenching. Wasting no time, Sevika ensured that the little girl was taken far away from the chaos, successfully escaping the prison island. I honestly believed it was the end for Jinx, but to my surprise, it wasn’t.

I remember mentioning that there would probably be two outcomes in that scene: Isha crying and reaching out while Sevika carries her away in the trailer. Now, we finally know what happened. However, I was not prepared for the ending of episode 6, and it still weighs heavily on my mind. The reason being, Isha sacrificed herself, which was essentially the central theme of the episode - sacrifice. With Isha’s sacrifice to save Jinx, it is highly likely that our manic pixie will now step up as the revolutionary leader. This presents an opportunity for her to rewrite her story and make it better. Or at least that’s what I hope.

[1-oc-atatime]

OC#2: Jack Adams Topp

Jack Topp – Character Overview

Basic Information and Appearance: Jack Topp, nicknamed “Jolly Jack” or “Birdy” (for being a pilot), is a 26-year-old fighter pilot born on January 11, 1998. Of mixed Mexican and Scottish heritage, Jack stands at 5'10", with a lean but powerful build and strong legs from never skipping leg day. His light brown hair is always messy due to his gear, and his wolf-cut hairstyle pairs with hooded almond eyes of the same shade. His dry skin results from constantly shifting altitudes, though he secretly keeps lotion nearby. Jack's most distinctive features are his scar from a teenage bike accident and big, calloused hands, the result of weightlifting and military life.

Personality and Traits: Jack is a blend of charm and carelessness. He’s witty and easy-going, but often struggles to take things seriously. While he jokes and laughs through awkward moments, he also exhibits a deep sense of responsibility, making him someone others feel safe around. Jack wants to be seen as dependable and approachable, though some might find him intimidating at first. He’s a hopeless romantic but has never experienced true love, relying on casual encounters during leave to cope with stress. His love language is touch and quality time, and he dreams of finding someone to share his life with.

Though outwardly humorous, Jack wrestles with creeping mental health challenges from his dangerous career and lost teammates. His pessimism grows with age, and his biggest fear is letting down his family. Despite a laid-back exterior, he’s fiercely competitive and quick to act, traits essential in his military role. Jack tends to bite his lips and pick at his skin—small habits that hint at his inner restlessness.

Family and Relationships: Family means everything to Jack. Raised in a working-class household, he was nurtured despite his parents’ busy schedules. His younger brother, Thomas, is four years his junior and studying to become a pediatric surgeon. Jack’s most cherished memories involve moments with his brother, including saving his life when he accidentally fell out of a treehouse. His best friend since childhood, Jacob West, remains a close ally, though military duties make it difficult to stay in touch. Jack dreams of having pets—a cat or even a tarantula—but his current lifestyle doesn’t allow for it.

Career and Hobbies: Jack serves as a fighter pilot for the U.S. Navy, flying both the A-10 Warthog and F-35 jets. He enjoys the thrill and purpose of his job but knows the emotional toll will leave scars. In his free time, he enjoys gaming, working out, and reading sci-fi. He also has a soft spot for stray cats on base, feeding them whenever he can. While not on missions, Jack attends college courses online to further his education.

Despite his dangerous work, Jack maintains a sense of humor. His favorite media include Skyrim and old country music, especially Marty Robbins’ “(Ghost) Riders in the Sky.” A tech enthusiast, he regrets not pursuing a career in computers or becoming a civilian pilot, but he tries not to dwell on it too much.

Values and Challenges: Jack believes freedom means ensuring others feel safe and able to live as they wish. He despises betrayal and is especially wary of people who misuse power. His idea of redemption is working to become better every day. Though he distrusts clowns and fears snakes and hippos, Jack bravely faces challenges and treats danger as part of the job. His worst childhood memory is the disappointment of his parents missing his first football game, but it only fueled his desire to make them proud.

Lifestyle and Aspirations: Jack enjoys life’s small pleasures—whether indulging in his favorite meal of breakfast casserole or relaxing on a Sunday afternoon with video games. While he lives modestly in his barracks room, he splurges on his prized possession: a jet-black 2024 Porsche 911 Carrera. His dream is to retire somewhere peaceful, ideally with a partner who can match his humor and make life feel complete. For now, Jack focuses on his mission—saving lives and making the world a bit safer while trying not to lose himself along the way.

[divyaastro-ashram]

Mangal Dosha and Past Life Karma

In the intricate tapestry of astrology, the phenomenon of Mangal Dosha and the concept of past life karma intertwine to shape our destinies, particularly in matters of marriage and relationships. Let's delve into the depths of this celestial confluence and unravel the mysteries that lie within.

Understanding Mangal Dosha

Mangal Dosha, often referred to as Kuja Dosha arises when the fiery planet Mars (Mangal) occupies certain pivotal houses in a person's natal chart. These houses include the 1st, 4th, 7th, 8th, or 12th houses. The presence of Mangal Dosha is believed by some to portend potential challenges and disruptions in marital harmony.

 

The Influence of Past Life Karma

● Unresolved Issues: Past life karma influences present circumstances, including relationship dynamics. Unresolved conflicts or challenges from previous incarnations may manifest as obstacles in current relationships, contributing to disharmony or discord. Understanding these past experiences can offer valuable insights into the root causes of present-day challenges, facilitating healing and growth.

● Karmic Debt: Actions and choices from past lives accrue karmic debts that individuals must address in their current existence. Positive actions yield positive karma, while negative actions result in karmic debts that require resolution. In the context of relationships, past life karma can manifest as patterns of behaviour or recurring themes that influence interpersonal dynamics and emotional connections.

● Lessons and Growth Opportunities: Past life karma presents individuals with opportunities for growth, healing, and spiritual evolution. Challenges and hardships experienced in past incarnations serve as lessons that shape our character, values, and relationships in the present. By recognizing and embracing these lessons, individuals can break free from karmic cycles, transcend limitations, and cultivate deeper levels of self-awareness and compassion.

● Karmic Connections: Souls often reincarnate in groups, forming karmic connections and soul contracts that span multiple lifetimes. These connections influence the dynamics of relationships, drawing individuals together to fulfil mutual karmic lessons and purposes. Past life karma can manifest as strong attractions or conflicts between individuals, reflecting the intricate web of interconnected destinies and shared experiences.

● Transformation and Redemption: Past life karma offers opportunities for redemption and transformation, allowing individuals to overcome past mistakes and evolve spiritually. Through self-reflection, forgiveness, and acts of compassion, individuals can release themselves from the grip of negative karma and align with higher vibrational energies. By embracing the principles of love, forgiveness, and self-awareness, individuals can transcend the limitations of past karma and create a future defined by harmony, abundance, and spiritual fulfilment.

 

The Interplay Between Mangal Dosha and Past Life Karma

 

1. Unresolved Issues: Mangal Dosha is thought to be associated with Mars' influence, governing traits like passion, aggression, and impulsiveness. Past life actions driven by these energies may have led to discord or unresolved conflicts in relationships, which could reverberate into the present life as challenges in marital dynamics. Understanding these past actions can illuminate the root causes of current relationship challenges, offering opportunities for growth and reconciliation.

 

2. Balancing Past Actions: The positioning of Mars in specific houses can signify areas where karmic lessons require attention and resolution. For instance, Mangal Dosha in the 7th house, representing partnerships, might indicate a need for improved communication and understanding to address past relationship imbalances. By acknowledging and addressing these karmic imprints, individuals can work towards restoring harmony and balance in their current relationships.

Key Considerations 

1. Divergent Views: It's essential to note that not all astrologers subscribe to the notion of Mangal Dosha and its association with past life karma. Some advocate for a comprehensive analysis of the entire birth chart, considering planetary aspects and other factors for a more nuanced understanding. This diversity of interpretations highlights the complexity of astrological principles and the importance of seeking guidance from experienced practitioners who align with your beliefs and values.

 

2. Focus on Solutions: Regardless of its origins, astrology emphasizes the pursuit of remedies and solutions to mitigate challenges. Instead of dwelling solely on past life influences, the focus lies on practical strategies and spiritual practices aimed at fostering harmony and resilience in relationships. By embracing these solutions, individuals can proactively address Mangal Dosha-related concerns and cultivate healthier, more fulfilling partnerships.

Seeking Guidance and Solutions

Navigating the complexities of Mangal Dosha and its purported karmic implications necessitates personalized insights and guidance from a knowledgeable astrologer.

1. Astrological Analysis: Consulting a proficient astrologer allows for a detailed examination of your birth chart, offering tailored insights into Mangal Dosha's influence and potential karmic connections. Experienced astrologers can provide nuanced interpretations and practical recommendations to help individuals navigate relationship challenges and harness the transformative power of astrological insights.

 

2. Remedial Measures: While Mangal Dosha may pose challenges, it doesn't signify inevitable doom for relationships. Astrological remedies, such as prayers, rituals, mangal dosh puja or gemstone recommendations, offer avenues for alleviating the Dosha's impact and fostering marital harmony. By incorporating these remedies into their spiritual practices, individuals can strengthen their bond with their partner and cultivate a supportive, nurturing environment for their relationship to thrive. 

The Bottom Line

In the realm of astrology, the interplay between Mangal Dosha and past life karma adds layers of complexity to our understanding of relationships and marital dynamics. As we navigate this intricate terrain, it's imperative to approach these concepts with humility, open-mindedness, and a willingness to explore diverse perspectives. Remember, while astrology provides valuable insights, our actions and choices ultimately shape our destiny, guiding us toward growth, resilience, and profound self-discovery. By embracing the wisdom of astrology and integrating its teachings into our lives, we can cultivate deeper connections, foster personal growth, and embark on a journey of spiritual evolution and fulfilment.