#crowley is pure sass

[bipolargreen]

Crowley has mastered the art of being both subtly insulting and overtly insulting.

My favorite “You Need Some Ice For That Burn” a la Crowley:

“You idiots sent an idiot to lead a gang of idiots to attack a bookshop. Those idiots want their Archangel back so they can fire him.”

✨Pure poetry ✨

[gribok-art]

[ Arcane x Good Omens ] - A little demonic miracle

What do we say Viktor nation? Crowley nation?

Idk how it'd work in Arcane or their outfits/appearance but I can see them having common traits with Aziraphale and Crowley.

Like, how funny would it be to see Viktor go full sass like Crowley? Jayce also kinda has Aziraphale's innocence? Though Aziraphale looks like a cinnamon roll but could actually kill you.

Or like, he's going along with whatever the council decided, feels guilt, bad guy, ready to become a demon and a fallen angel (his suicide attempt), and here comes Viktor, all "eeh a bit egotistical don't you think", having stolen his notebook, initiating the break in into the lab, doing the "it's not my bedroom" joke while Jayce immediately tries to come clean.

Plus, Viktor has a disability (Crowley has snake eyes) and wears a brace + cane (Crowley has glasses), Viktor has a past in the undercity (Crowley has a past in Heaven), Viktor is sassy and smart and doesn't express his emotions and thinks he's imperfect (Crowley much ?).

Jayce wants to root out the corruption, he doesn't want violence, he has a hammer for a weapon (flaming sword), "They're animals!" vs "You're the bad guys!", him drawing Viktor's portrait (Aziraphale draws well).

They don't match perfectly but they certainly have common traits. It makes it funny to imagine them in some Good Omens scenes.

Mel : What is he, your boyfriend, husband, your bit on the side? Jayce : He's too pure of heart to be anyone's bit on the side, he's just... a partner I know...

Viktor after Jayce's place has blown up : You could stay at my place... if you'd like.

Viktor driving a car the undercity style, no speed limit, no following rules, full chaos, while Jayce is gripping onto his seat, "You're going too fast for me".

Jayce going to see every council member for something, Viktor following behind "Can I watch~?". Viktor coming up with a last name "Viktor... J. Anthony" Jayce : Anthony? Viktor : You don't like it?

Jayce being a crybaby because of his perfectly white jacket getting dirt on it and Viktor sighing as he miracles it away.

[missninapea]

🪽Crumpet The Cherub🪽

🤍A Good Omens fanfiction🖤 Summary:

The two Archangels, Gabriel and Michael had a meeting with God. She created a small baby angel. But Gabriel had an idea, he wants to send him to Crowley and Aziraphale to take care of him.

Chapter 1: The birth of a cherub☁️

Gabriel and Michael were in heaven with God. She called them for something very important.

God said, her voice echoed through the clouds. "I suppose you both know why I called you here."

Gabriel, straight and serious as usual, responded with a calm and professional tone. "Of course, we are at your service, My Lord."

Gabriel looked at Michael with a smug grin. Michael noticed his smug grin, she raised an eyebrow at him, and then she turned her attention back to God. As God spoke, he listened intently. A cherub being born was rare, and quite an occurrence. His interest was piqued. He listened intently to God's words, a mixture of respect and curiosity in his expression. The mention of a new cherub intrigued him, and he wondered how it would affect things in Heaven. He glanced over at Michael, who also looked attentive.

Curiosity getting the better of him, Gabriel spoke up. "Beg Your pardon, My Lord, but if I may ask... What does the arrival of this new cherub signify?" God smiled faintly, appreciating his curiosity. Her voice continued to echo throughout the clouds.

"The arrival of this cherub signifies a shift in the cosmic order. This cherub will play a crucial role in the Great Plan, just as your roles as archangels are equally important."

Gabriel's interest was piqued even further. A new cherub playing a crucial role in the Great Plan? How interesting. He shared a quick look with Michael, who seemed to be just as curious as him. He returned his gaze to God, his expression betraying no hint of his surprise or intrigue.

"We understand, My Lord. This is a pivotal moment, indeed." He said, grinning like a doofus. "Does this new cherub possess special abilities or powers that we should be aware of, My Lord?" Michael asked.

God smiled faintly again, clearly pleased with their interest.

"Indeed, this new cherub will have unique abilities that will be essential in the fulfillment of the Great Plan. However, it is crucial that the exact nature of these abilities remain undisclosed, even to you archangels, for now."

Gabriel listened intently, his expression betraying no hint of disappointment or frustration at the lack of details. But there was a hint of sass and cheekiness. He accepted the need for secrecy.

"Of course, My Lord. We understand the importance of discretion in these matters." He said. Then God spoke of the new cherub being created from pure holy light. Both the archangels expressions were once again serious and attentive. Michael spoke up. "If it is created from pure Holy light, this new cherub will be a being of immense power and grace."

Gabriel nodded, his eyes fixed on God, processing this new information. "Precisely, Michael. This new cherub will embody the purity and divinity of Heaven itself. Its existence will be a reflection of my own essence, and thus, it will possess extraordinary powers and abilities." Gabriel said with that annoying smug grin on his damn face.

God held the light with her hands, almost done creating the cherub. Gabriel watched intently, his eyes fixed on the flickering light in God's hands. It was an almost celestial moment—the creation of a new being.

"Almost... Almost..."

She whispered. She closed Her eyes, focusing all her energy and divine power. The light continued to flicker, and the air grew tense with anticipation. Gabriel held his breath, his heart almost seemed to stop for a moment, as he waited for the new cherub to be brought into existence. The light grew brighter and brighter, until..The cherub was finally born. Both Gabriel and Michael stood in awe, their faces betraying their wonder at witnessing the creation of a new cherub. The bright light faded, revealing the newly born cherub, its pure presence almost too radiant to behold.

The Little newborn cherub began to coo quietly as God held it in her hands. The sound of the cherub's coos filled the air, a soft and soothing melody that seemed to bring a sense of peace to the heavens. Gabriel glanced over at Michael again, their expressions mirroring each other's awe and amazement at the sight of the newborn cherub.

 "A perfect creation, just as I envisioned it..."

She looked at the cherub with a gentle and motherly smile, cradling it tenderly in her large hands. Cause.. y'know, she's God. God is huge lol.

Gabriel studied the cherub intently, intrigued by its small yet awe-inspiring presence. He glanced at Michael, then back at God, his mind swimming with questions but knowing better than to ask for details.

 "It truly is a work of divine beauty, My Lord." Said Michael, as she smiled up to God. "But..Who is going to look after it?" Of course, every new creation needs guidance and learning to be able to grow strong and healthy. Gabriel glanced at Michael, then at God. He had been wondering the same thing himself. The care and growth of the new cherub were crucial for its development and potential role in the Great Plan.

"Ahh, great question, Michael." Gabriel grinds. "The care and guidance of this cherub are of utmost importance. It needs to be properly looked after, taught the ways of Heaven, and nurtured to reach its full potential. Oh! Wait, actually.."

Gabriel thought of an idea of who should take care of the baby. He thought of the both specific angel and demon, Aziraphale and Crowley. He looked at God with a spark of mischief in his eyes, the corners of his mouth twitching into a small smirk.

"My Lord... May I make a suggestion?" He said, looking up at God.

Gabriel's stupid smirk widened, and he couldn't help but feel a sense of satisfaction as he proposed his idea to God and Michael.

 "What if, just an idea." He chuckles. "We assign Aziraphale and his little demon friend, Crowley to watch over the new cherub?" 

He paused, waiting for their reactions.

Michael's eyes widening, her expression a mix of surprise and disbelief. She glanced at God, then back at Gabriel.

"Aziraphale and.. Crowley? The bloody demon? Surely you can't be serious."

Gabriel chuckled once more, his smirk never leaving his face. He enjoyed the mild shock on Michael's face.

"Oh, I'm quite serious. Just think about it. It would be an... interesting arrangement, to say the least. An angel and a demon, watching over a cherub. And imagine the potential for... unforeseen events."

Michael shook her head, clearly not convinced.

"That sounds like a recipe for disaster, and you know it. These two have a complicated history and relationship. Putting them in charge of raising a cherub? It's an absolute recipe for chaos. And you know how Crowley is..He's.."

"Ohh, I'm sure they'll be fiiiiine" Said Gabriel. "Oh, uh.. What's the little ones gender, if I may ask?" He smiled like a goofy dad. "The cherub is boy." Said God. "A beautiful baby boy."

The two archangels smiled as God lowers her hands for them to pick up the new creation. He has small wings, soft, short white hair, light golden eyes, and plump rosy cheeks. He almost looks similar to a curtain Principality.

(Ahem Aziraphale haha) Gabriel held the cherub, cradling into his arms like a proud father. "You look awfully familiar.." He smiled cheekyly. The cherub yawned..and then he sneezed.

"Hahaha! Oh yeah, he's perfect for these two." Gabriel said, referring to Aziraphale and Crowley. God chuckled. And hands a little basket to Micheal. "Here. Take this." God said softly. There was a soft, cozy blanket in it for the baby angel.

"Alrighty, little guy. You ready?" Gabriel said with a smirk. He gently and carefully put the cherub in the basket. The cherub was naked lol. But at least he was wearing a little robe. He grew a little fussy, not sure what was going on. "Shhh.. It'll be alright, darling.." Michael whispered to the baby, calming him down a little. "Right. Shall we get goin'?" Gabriel pointed to the elevator. Michael nodded and smiled.

They both walked towards the elevator along with the cherub in the basket. "Ciao!" Gabriel said to God lol. As the two took the elevator down to earth, the cherub grew fussy again. The busy street in Soho was a bit noisy for the poor little one. "Don't worry, little guy, we're almost there."

Gabriel said as he peaked in the basket and gave him a little small wave. They eventually arrived at the bookshop entrance. "Here we are! The old angel's bookcave." Gabriel chuckled. Michael then gently put down the basket. "See you, my lovely. Now be good to them." Michael smiled warmly. They both head off back to heaven, Gabriel was feeling pretty confident about the whole thing. "Are you sure this is a good idea, Gabriel?" Michael said, anxiously. "Of course! I'm sure they're great with kids!" Gabriel said with a sassy wink. Soon, the noisy streets of Soho began to subside a little and the cherub was still inside the basket, already fast asleep in front of the bookshop doors.

🤍To be continued in chapter 2🖤

[kajaono]

Still stuck here. So let me make yet another post about that scene

Crowley is always so loud, so full of energy, so "present". But this is the first we saw of him after Nina asked him: "Have you been together long?". He seems kinda... resigned? Nina forced him to face his one feelings and we all know it was a key moment for Crowley. And we all talk about Maggie saying: "You need to talk" is what makes him to confess his feelings. But honestly? I think he already knew earlier that he has to confess his feelings eventually. This is why he told Muriel:

This was BEFORE Maggie said: "You never really talk."

This is also why he seems to taken back during the french café scene. He already entered the stage of depression and accaptance at the same time. He accepts that he loves an angel but he is also depressed because he has no clue how to tell Azi who is so busy with other stuff... who is so pure (in Crowleys eyes).

And so Crowley sits in this café, and sends so much mixed signals. On the one hand everything about this scene feels like a romantic date: the red rose, the red wine, the little stars. On the other hand he is silent, isn't moving much, has a certain aura of sadness around him and has already started drinking on his own.

Because Nina was the first human being to look through his carefully build mask of sass and coolness. "Have you been together long"? shatters all his walls, and he knows he has to do something, but doesn't even know if Azi loves him as well... him, a fallen angel, and so he drinks wine on his own. Until he sees his angel and can not control himself and ask: "Do you want a glass?" Because he doesn't know what to do, but he knows he wants this angel in his life and he is not gonna go down without a fight. Hello season 3

[bipolargreen]

Nobody does “I couldn’t give less of a fuck” like Crowley 😂

[iwanttobepersephone]

Maybe it's just me, but I feel like Pritchard was the kinda guy to act with such pure sass that, if you didn't know he would routinely check up on people in private, it would feel inconsiderate. And then I imaged a little skit where Halt had pulled a usual joke of his, but in a very different manner than he did in Hibernia, and Pritchard just burst out laughing. Then, this happened:

Pritchard: "I'm sorry, I've just never heard Halt say that with a straight face before!" Halt, rolling his eyes: "Oh, shut up!" Pritchard, turning to look at him: "did you just tell me to shut up??" Halt, clearly regretting it but not wanting to back down: "Uh... yeah" Pritchard: "Well, you certainly got brave! Care to inform me of when you suddenly got this new attitude?" Halt: "Tough living, Pritchard" Pritchard: "Ohohohoh, is that true?" Pritchard: (turns to face Egon) "Can you believe this? Would you ever have expected an apprentice to talk to me like that?" Egon, in disbelief: "No, never" Pritchard: "I've heard him pull that joke thousands of times before, but never once so seriously!" Pritchard, turning to Halt: "And may I ask, dear, sweet apprentice of mine, if that was a genuine assessment of the group?" Halt: "No, it was sarcasm" Pritchard: "Ah, sarcasm, I should have guessed, huh?" Halt: "Can we get back on topic now?" Pritchard: "Oh, I don't know," (turns to the rest of the rangers), "can we?" Renegade Rangers: (a small chorus of "yeah"'s and "mhm"'s, along with multiple sources if barely contained laughter) Pritchard: "Ah, perfect! And, since it seems Halt is in need of a reminder on some manners, what do we say, Halt?"

Halt, under his breath: thanks

Pritchard: "Perfect! Now, back to the topic we were on. What were you saying, Crowley?"

[hootybal-lecter]

Showed my mom Good Omens and she giggled pretty much anytime Crowley walked because of the amount of pure ✨sass✨ he puts into each footstep

[ineffableandco]

✨Good Omens 2 Review✨

There’s so much to say I don’t really know where to start. After watching it I feel utterly and deeply satisfied. I expected this season to be great and I’m not disappointed. It goes beyond my wildest dreams. It’s just perfect. The cinematography, the music, the acting, the writing, everything is just top class. There’s drama, comedy, epic and it all blends in together very harmoniously to create a brilliant piece of television.

I remember being super excited when S2 was announced and when we got the first on set photos but it was nothing compared to the immense joy I felt when I saw my favourite angel and demon back on my screen. It was like meeting up with friends after a long time, it felt just right, like coming home.

I really love how vibrant the colours are this season, I find it extremely pleasing aesthetically speaking. I love that we get to see more of street where the bookshop is and simply more of the bookshop itself. And I’m sure there’s more to reveal. A round of applause for the people who worked hard to build all the various locations in a studio!

Regarding the story itself, I love how it is written and how it unfolds. It is very much about Crowley and Aziraphale but the other characters really have the opportunity to shine no matter the amount of screen time they have. One of my favourite things about S1 was the cold open in episode 3 so I’m thrilled that we get that in S2 with the minisodes. They were brilliant so a big shoutout to the talented people who wrote them!

Now about the characters, can we talk about how fucking amazing they are? I’ll start with Miranda Richardson’s Shax. I LOVE her, a perfect mix of comedy and badass. It’s in tune with Madame Tracy, her character from S1, despite them being two different characters.

In the “returning actor, different character” category Nina and Maggie are just fabulous, I just love them. I really love the wonderful dynamic the characters and actresses have.

As for the new characters, especially Mrs. Sandwich, Mr. Brown, and Pat, they may not have had that much screen time but they were just brilliant and really funny. Still in the new characters category, I am very fond of Muriel and Saraqael. Muriel because they’re the sweetest cupcake ever and Saraqael because the sass is incredible. So a big shoutout to these two wonderful actresses! And also a big shoutout to Shelley Conn for nailing the role of Beelzebub.

Now Crowley and Aziraphale, I didn’t think I could love those two idiots more than I already do but obviously I was wrong. And if anyone needed any more evidence that David Tennant and Michael Sheen are perfect for the roles then they should watch S2. I love how noticeable yet still subtle the changes in the characters and their relationship are. It’s just a natural progression. David and Michael already had incredible chemistry in S1 but in S2 it’s even more remarkable. Their off-screen friendship shines through and greatly contributes to making the connection between their characters even more genuine and believable. (I’ll write more about them/my theories later).

Now I’d like to quickly talk about two of my favourite things this season: the opening scene and episode 3.

That opening scene was everything. I didn’t expect to see Angel Crowley but what a delightful surprise! I cried because he’s just gorgeous and innocent. The pure delight and excitement he feels about creating stars is just so precious. I’m glad we got to see it and I really hope we’ll get to see more eventually.

Now episode 3 was just hilarious. The bits in Edinburgh had me in stitches. I’m beyond thrilled that David Tennant got to use his Scottish accent, it was music to my ears. And Crowley was just peak comedy. One of my favourite little details in that episode is the change in the telephone wallpaper, switching from the Union Jack to the Scottish flag. I see what you did there 👀🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

Overall, my mind is blown and my heart is half in pieces and half holding on as best as it can. This new season is a little gem. I laughed and I cried but overall my heart was filled with joy because I got to see my favourite characters again. I wasn’t worried about what this new season would be like but I’m still really pleased to see that it’s Good Omens at heart. And I’m sure Terry would love it. It is truly a labour of love. Made by people who love the story and characters for people who love them just as equally. But also people who love their craft and love to share it with people who are just as eager as them. There are so many details that are so meaningful. And the Easter eggs, I spotted a few of them and I know there are more for me to discover. I also want to give a big shoutout to the costume department who made the wonderful costumes they are truly marvellous. A round of applause to Peter Anderson Studios for their wonderful designs. And also a special mention to David Arnold and his team for the delightful music. The theme variation for the end titles of episode 3 have special place in my heart. Bless me bagpipes it was glorious!

And finally a heartfelt thank you from the bottom of my heart to the wonderful people who made it all happen. Lots of love and gratitude from me. ♥️

@goodomensonprime @neil-gaiman

[bipolargreen]

Crowley is absolutely saying “f*ck you” to Gabriel and Beelzebub without saying a word 😂 That attitude tho!

Oh lawrd

Good Omens as a book and as a show is gonna leave a permanent mark on my brain.

Rhetorically, a scorch mark, after David and Michael’s Aziracrow chemistry burned the old gender binary mindset to the ground.

Probably one of most glorious things I’ve ever experienced.

[awesomelyanxiouspanda]

A Fiercely Bleeding Heart (Lucifer/OFC): Chapter 7

Story summary: Emery (Our lovely OFC) owns a thriving coffee shop smack dab in the middle of Monroe City, Mo. She’s well known for her unique coffee drinks and her “coffee charity”. What happens when a woman with too much heart- and not nearly enough common sense- comes across the fallen archangel in his mostly human state? Will Lucifer behave, or will he bite the hand that (quite literally) feeds him?  

Warnings/Tags: NO SMUT IN THIS CHAPTER. PURELY STORY LINE ADDITION! 

Loosely based around S.13 E. 13! Plus size OC, OC is gullible and a big softie, Lucifer in his nearly human form, Soft Lucifer, Dean and Sam cosplaying FBI agents again, Canon typical violence, Non-Canon compliant story line, Soulmate AU-ish?, canon typical cursing, NOT a slow burn, not beta’d we die like our king Crowley, smut, vaginal fingering, oral sex (male receiving), unprotected smut, commitments are made, soulmate bonds are formed, praise kink, Luci can dirty talk with the best of them (we all know his sass would be sinful in bed),  little bit of drama, some self-esteem issues, possessive Lucifer, breeding kink, dom/sub themes, pet names (such as princess, good girl, and little one), Castiel awkwardly and adorably cosplaying an FBI agent, Castiel is also scary af.

A/N: Draaammmaaa. Return of the Winchesters. Emery finally meets Cas! And, finally, reintroduction to the storyline of season 13, with creative liberties taken of course. Sorry this one took so long and it's a bit short, but it took forever to get the motivation and right head space to move on with! I hope you all enjoy!

“Have a good night!” 

I waved at Lucy as she backed out through the door and let out a happy sigh, nearly collapsing against the counter with a goofy smile. Today had gone better than expected. After two full weeks of the shop being closed so soon after my last break, I had no delusions of grandeur on what the first day back would be like, and yet still, it was nothing like the chaos I had pictured. I had expected angry customers, understocked sources, and cranky patrons of the coffee charity when in reality, it just seemed all my regulars had solely been concerned by my absence. It was heartwarming, to say the least.

“You good boss?” Amy asked cautiously. 

I couldn’t help but chuckle to myself. She’d been a mother hen since I’d gotten back. In fact, most of the staff had been texting me regularly since I’d fed them all the first little lie about being in recovery from an accident. To be fair, it wasn’t much of a lie the first time around. This time, though, was filled with much more fun activities.

Turning to face her, I flashed her a bigger smile and said, “Yeah, I’m great, actually. Today’s been nice, right?” 

That earned a grin from the young woman as she nodded emphatically. 

“We’re really glad to have you back and to be back. You had us all scared, Emery.”

Empathy bled through her tone and warmth every bone in my body. I truly was lucky to have her, to have each one of them, in my life. 

“Yeah, yeah, I was scared too,” I admitted quietly, eyes unfocusing as I was pulled deep into the recesses of the memories I tried to keep blocked out. 

I cleared my throat abruptly and shifted back to my feet, lips quirking into a half-smile. 

“I’m just lucky Nick was there to help.”

Her pixie-like features twisted between emotions before settling on something like contentment and she gave a little smile and a nod. 

“Anyway, enough jabbering. I’m going to grab the deposit and drop it off at the bank, you want anything while I’m out?” I asked as I popped up off the counter. 

“A million dollars?” she quipped back cheekily.

I couldn’t stop the roll of my eyes that followed my heavy groan. 

“Sttoooppp, you’re too young to make jokes like that. At least wait til you’re my age.”

Her laugh was interrupted by the ring of the bell over the door. 

“Hi! Welcome in!” she quickly recited.

I turned to echo the greeting but the words fell silent on my lips as I spotted the supposed customers walking through the lobby. My heart began to race as the acrid taste of fear coated my tongue. Two of them I recognized as the “FBI agents” that entered my shop weeks ago, whom I now knew to be Sam and Dean Winchester, thanks to Lucifer’s entail. The other was someone I’d never seen before, but he was no less gorgeous or terrifying. If anything, there was something about him that was worse… better? My brain was very confused. 

“Uhm, actually, could you do the bank run for me, Amy?” I asked gently, shooting the men a “one moment” signal.

I did my best to keep my worries hidden as I didn’t bother waiting for her reply, ducking beneath the counter and opening the safe to grab the drop bag from beneath. 

“You sure?” she asked, confusion obvious in her voice.

While Amy was essentially my second in command, I usually didn’t bother her with managerial duties, but, at this moment, I needed her out of the shop as soon as possible. 

“I’m sure. I need to talk to these lovely gentlemen and this is a good chance for you to get some fresh air while it’s nice,” I replied, forcing on a smile as I rose back to my feet and handed her the bag, “I’ll see you when you get back, okay?”

There was an obvious distrust in her narrowed eyes as she looked between the trio of men and I before she relented with a small nod. 

“Okay, I’ll have my phone on me. Be back in ten,” she said, loudly enough for the men in the lobby to hear.

Oh sweet Amy. So tiny yet to protective. If only she knew these men could kill us both. Well, I knew two of them could. I still wasn’t certain who the last one was, though I was sure if he was with the Winchesters… he couldn’t be any safer. 

The instant she was out the door, I placed on my most professional smile and skirted around the counter toward the “agents”.

“Agents, welcome back. I hope nothing’s happened again if you’re here?”

I did my best to hide anything other than courtesy and kindness but it was hard when three larger-than-life men were staring me down. 

Sam, as sweet as before, offered me a smile before reaching out a hand my way. 

“Emery, right?” he asked.

“Yes! I’m sorry, agents, but I don’t remember your names. My memory isn’t great in my old age of thirty,” I joked easily. 

Dean snorted with a little smirk and commented, “Just wait til you get to our age.” 

I saw the way Sam rolled his eyes minutely before that same patient smile covered his face once more. Before he could speak, I turned toward the third man and offered out my hand, determined to figure out who he was. He was a little shorter than Dean but still quite tall, with perfectly coifed dark brown hair, intense blue eyes, and strong masculine features defined by a light layer of stubble around his lower face. His tan trench coat was a little odd for a supposed FBI agent but it did give off a nice aura of detective. All in all, he was certainly a dream boat.

“I don’t think we met last time. Emery Pike,” I said. 

There was an obvious hesitation before he reached out and limply shook my hand, retreating as soon as possible as he cleared his throat. 

“Agent Beyonce.”

Oh. Oh, that voice. Had I not had Lucifer in my life, I had no doubt I would have fallen for him in that instant. 

“Beyonce?” I had to ask, caught off guard. 

“Yeah, like- like the singer, she-”

“Listen, Emery, we’re sorry to drop in like this,” Sam cut off the other agent sharply, “But there was something we needed to talk to you about.” 

“Uh, okay, sure.”

It felt hard to swallow as I gestured toward the counter. 

“Would you guys like some coffee or pastries while we talk?” I offered. 

Dean’s eyebrows lifted instantly at the word pastries and he asked, “What kind you got?” 

Gone was the stern agent, instantly replaced by something much softer and more genuine. I couldn’t hide the smile that slid across my lips as I made my way to the counter. 

“Nothing too crazy but I hand make everything three times a week. I’ll check what I have left.”

As I went into the back store room, I could hear the men arguing in hushed voices even over the pounding of my heart in my ears. I quickly shuffled through what was left and came out with almost a dozen options. For a moment, I debated praying for Lucifer but I also didn’t want to drag him into something possibly dangerous for him if they didn’t know about our relationship yet. Hopefully, it was something I could handle on my own. If I put him in harm’s way of those three just to save my own skin, well, what kind of soulmate would I be? 

“Here we go. I’ve got some muffins, blueberry and chocolate chip, a couple of apple and cherry danishes, and some plain bagels. Please, help yourself to whatever you’d like. I also have some coffee, freshly brewed.”

While I was no actress, I’d played the part of perfect hostess for so long that I was almost certain they wouldn’t see through to the panic beneath the mask. 

“Thanks, uh, I’ll take a coffee, black,” Sam said as he sat, seemingly giving up fighting Dean’s sweets craving. 

“Sure, if you decide you want cream or sugar, there’s some at the end there,” I replied, gesturing to the little turn wheel with the keep-cold creamer pot and sugar packets. 

“I’ll take some too,” Agent Beyonce added as I poured Sam’s cup, “Please.” 

Flashing him a genuine smile, I nodded and poured one for him as well. It was obvious he was either new to this, or was genuinely uncomfortable around other people. I almost felt bad for him being stuck with the Winchesters. I had to wonder if he knew what their ruse was, what they really were, or if he was just dragged along. 

Of course, in the grand scheme of things, I could determine that the Winchesters weren’t bad people- though, to Lucifer of cour,se, they were. It didn’t mean I had to like them either way, considering they wanted to kill the love of my life despite the fact he was becoming less and less “evil” to their standards. 

“Here we go.”

It was impossible to hide the grin that blossomed across my face at the way Dean nearly lit up with a groan when he took a bite of the apple danish. 

“YOU make these?” he asked in obvious disbelief. 

Sam gave a huff of a laugh, shaking his head, as I agreed softly. 

“Almost as good as pie, almost,” Dean muttered, shoving the rest of the danish in his mouth before pulling the last two in his direction. 

“Thank you, but if we might…?”

Sam trailed off and I quickly gave a little nod. 

“Of course. What brings you guys in again?” I asked.

I reached out and snagged the little pot of creamer as Agent Beyonce put it down, mimicking his actions and pouring in a good slosh before snagging some sugar packets to add in as well. 

“We know about you and L- Nick.”

His words made the world slow down instantly. My mouth went dry and my fingers froze in their actions, but I quickly kicked myself into gear with a little curse in my head, hazel eyes catching his soft green ones as he stared me down. 

“Okay, and? I know he wasn’t the one who killed that guy, so what does it matter who I share my love life with?” I asked, trying to keep my voice level. 

The guys exchanged looks and, much to my surprise, Agent Beyonce was the one to speak next. 

“Nick isn’t who you think he is, Emery. He’s lying to you. He’s done horrible things-”

“What he means to say is that we don’t think Nick is being completely honest with you,” Sam cut in quickly.

Agent Beyonce cast Sam a hilarious bitch face before looking out the window and sipping his coffee, obviously off-put by being stepped on once again. Man, if Sam only knew how much I knew about “Nick” and how I knew Agent Beyonce was right. 

“Whatever he’s done in the past, I don’t care about,” I spoke truthfully as I took a drink of my own coffee, “He’s a good person now. That’s what matters. He literally saved my life after an accident. He kept me safe and healthy while I recovered. As far as I’m concerned, what he does now is what is important. We all have a past. What matters is how we grow and change from it.”

Sam’s eyebrows pinched together in frustration and thought, obviously trying to decide how to get through to me, but Agent Beyonce was quicker. 

“Lucifer is a murderer. He’s killed millions of people, Emery! He’d kill you too if it benefited him!”

His words were harsh, filled with such anger that I now had no doubt he had been affected by Lucifer in some way personally. Dean cursed softly as Sam tried to scramble for some kind of cover, but it was all useless. 

I knew I was in over my head at this point. Resting my face in my hands, I silently sent out a prayer to Lucifer for help and made sure to let him know it was the Winchesters who were here and why. 

“Listen, Emery, we just-”

“No, no, I think I’m done listening,” I cut him off coldly, lifting my head to look at the trio once more, “You’re not going to poison me against the one good man in my life. I don’t care what you have to say, whether you call him the devil or not. Nothing is going to change. Understood? Now, agents, I would appreciate it if you would get out of my shop before I have to call the cops. And believe me, when I say, this wouldn’t be the first time they’ve had to come to save me from rowdy men who have tried to hurt me so they’re going to believe me over even you suited jackasses!”

Their surprise would have been more satisfying if I weren’t shaking with the need to vomit and sob at the same time. 

“What’s it going to be? Gonna be another addition to the “tried to rape Emery” list, or you going to use your brains and get the hell out of here?” I snapped. 

Dean and Sam instantly raised their hands in submission, slowly backing away. 

“Okay, fine, we’ll leave,” Sam said carefully, “But please, think over what we said.” 

I looked over at the last one to move, Agent Beyonce, and instantly knew I was in trouble with the heat in his stare.

“You’re coming with us, whether you want to or not.” 

“Cas, don’t-!”

Cas. Castiel. The seraphim, younger brother to Lucifer, and most dangerous ally to the Winchesters. I should have known! God, I was fucking stupid. 

Before Dean could finish his sentence, the angel was by my side, one arm wrapped around my back and the other to my forehead.

“I’m sorry, but we can’t lose this chance. Jack and Mary’s life depend on it.” 

Jack? Mary? Who was- 

Everything went black mid-thought and I was pulled into the easiest sleep of my life. 

[crowleyscleaninglady]

So I’ve seen it where Michael sheen was talking about how he was originally going to play Crowley. I so bad want to see it. Not Aziraphale Crowley body swap but just Michael sheen Crowley. Would I miss David tenants’ walk? Absolutely. But the pure sass and spite? 100% worth it

Please Neil let it happen. Even for a few minutes. *checks bank account* I have $7 and I’ll begging you

[jyuunohana]

I'm deceased.

This is why we follow the 3rd commandment

[howl-fantasies]

Politeness

A/N - Words, when well used can be as dangerous as a weapon. Here is a request from a friend who wanted to see Alfred and Y/N roasting each other verbally with awful politeness. A bit of Victor x reader too. Hope you’ll like it. 🥰

Gotham city - Wayne's Mansion - 1PM

Truth be told, she had absolutely no idea about what she was doing here. “Would you like some tea, Ms Y/N”, asked the butler of the brat who contacted her, and offered her a fortune if she accepted to hack Wayne’s data base with one of his current employees, Lucius Fox. 

She was quite intrigued by the heir’s call to be honest. And the fact that he stole her contact in Gordon’s phone amused her beyond limits. The future king of the city had some good old darkness inside of him after all, a pure Gotham’s product like them all, even Jimbo. 

So she indulged him, agreeing to meet him at his manor later that day, and told Victor she was going to have some fun with some handsome rich kid. The sinister glance she earned and the sound of a gun security being lifted made her grin like the psycho woman she knew she was. 

But it was too tempting. And the funny reaction had worth it, as well as the mini shooting contest they had before she managed to flee Carmine’s mansion. She was 100% sure to be scold by the old man this evening for the commotion she had created. 

“Miss?” Asked again the butler. She snickered, seeing he was losing his patience. He didn’t want to see her here, at all. “Well aren’t you awfully polite my good Sir? Your cute tea offer isn’t as tempting as a good whiskey though, Irish, if you please.” She mocked while mimicking a ridiculous British accent. He scoffed a bit then gave her his more friendly crisped smile. “Someone has to be at least in this room. Concerning the whiskey, maybe it’s a bit too early for a young decent lady to play drunkard ”

Perfectly getting his insult, She faked a shocked face and even pushed the joke with putting her right hand on her heart. “Goodness, what a feisty butler you are Mister...Ah, please excuse me, I didn’t care enough to remember your lovely name. Mind if I call you Mister Tea from now on?” She provoked. 

His jaws tensed a bit but he didn’t lose his polite smile. “You’re a bit young for it but maybe you should go to see a doctor in order to check for a possible degeneration. Again, Madam, my name is Alfred Pennyworth.” He sassed. She lifted a brow at his answer and felt a sudden urge to smash his face against the counter. “More plain than Mister Tea, that’s for sure. But quite fitting : old, boring and plain, the perfect British trinity.” She instead decided to answer on the same tone. 

He blinked and grab a towel to start cleaning the dishes of his master. “Don’t you have a lovely sharp tongue Madam? You would have made me think of Mary Crowley, if I didn’t hear your foul mouth from outside, fifteen minutes ago.” He fired. She laughed so hard she had to grab the counter to not fall from her seat. 

“You sure have some nerves Mr Carson. Don’t you have some valet to terrorized around Downtown instead of playing mind games with me here? By the way, where are your master and Mister Fox?” She sneered. 

“Well at least you know your classics, I can see. I am the only one working here, and master Bruce will come in a minute with Mister Fox. Just give them a moment please.” He said flatly. She sighed a bit. 

“So, I’ve heard from my master that you’re... qualified in technology and might help us to crack a difficult security system.” He continues. “I’m so glad to see that your ears are still working despite your old age, indeed I am.” She answered with a grin when he frowned at the mention of his age. But he ignored it and asked again: “Is that what you are doing for a living? Hacking companies and selling their datas?” 

She snorted loud. Bruce Wayne should have investigated a bit more before calling her. Impatience was dangerous sometimes. Fortunately for him, she wasn’t in a lethal mood right now. She was enjoying herself too much, politely insulting the Butler and vice versa. 

“Used to, when I was not much older than your young master. But technology was just at its debuts so I had to develop other skills too for a decent living. But don’t worry, I’m still a queen with a keyboard under my fingers.” She answered. 

Alfred stayed silent after her words. He seemed to think a solid minute, eying her regularly then sighed. “You remind me of a young girl my master is friend with. Selina Kyle. You’re much more polite then her, thought, even if it’s just a facade. Do you happen to know her?” He asked. 

Y/N blinked once and searched in her memories for a second. “Only heard of her here and there, never had the chance to meet her in person.” She simply said. 

Alfred didn’t had the time to speak again, a high-pitched “Oh no. God no! Run, run, run!” resonated from the entry of the kitchen. Y/N turned her head and saw a young pre-teen girl being kept in place by a young boy, and behind them a man in a suit and a reserved demeanor. 

She mockingly waved her hand, singing a “Hi”, before turning again to face a confused Alfred. “Looks like she heard of me too”, she laughed while pointing Selina with her index. 

“Look, Selina, please...”, tried Bruce, but he was cut by her friend. “No, you look! That woman is dangerous. Not like slightly or moderately dangerous, but utterly dangerous.”, She rushed. “How impolite of you, Selina, She’s also here so you should talk to her directly you know”, said Y/N in a low tone, piercing her with her gaze, her head resting lazily in her right hand. 

“I know what you are doing for Falcone and with who!”, said immediately the girl, trying her best to sound as confident as usual. “Now you’re the one being dangerous my sweet.” Y/N cut her, without losing her calm. Her message was pretty clear, and the girl got it perfectly since she shut her mouth and gulped. 

“What is she talking about?” Asked Bruce eying the two suspiciously. Y/N saw Alfred moving to grab a knife but was quicker, smashing her palm flat against the blade. “Now, now, we were having so much fun a minute ago, Mister Tea. Don’t spoil our fun with reckless actions.” She then lifted her hand and turned to look at Wayne. “You’re a cute kid, boy. But you don’t pay attention enough to details before doing something. That’s why you are in this situation right now.” 

Though, the woman didn’t seem to want to attack him, just watching everyone like an hawk perched on a branch. “Ok, let’s address the elephant miss Kyle so kindly brought in the room. Yes, I am working for Carmine Falcone. Most of the time, but not today. I am here because you”, she pointed at Bruce, “had more guts then many men in the city and called me to help you. Even if you didn’t knew about my identity at this moment, you caught my attention.” She said. 

He nodded warily and she felt Alfred still watching her as intensely as she did a minute ago. “I accepted to help you, young Mister Wayne. And I am many things but someone who doesn’t keep her promises. So now the only question that matters is do you still want my help, or not?” 

The heir looked inside of her eyes a good solid minute before taking a step in her direction, ignoring Selina calling his name. Then he took another, and another until he was just in front of her and offered her his hand to shake. “If you are certain you are able to crack the system, extract the datas and give them to me without being caught, then I would appreciate your help very much.” He said. 

“Master Bruce!” Interjected Alfred, who joined his side and grab his shoulders to put some distance between him and Y/N. But before he could, the woman took the boy’s hand and pulled him to her with so much force he crashed again her plexus. “Let him go this instant!” Demanded the butler, grabbing the knife on the counter. 

“Relax, Mister Carson”, she deadpanned, then leaned until her mouth was just next to Bruce ear. “Again, you’re being too impatient, little boy. Think before acting.” She leaned back and saw his deep frown, he didn’t understand what she meant. 

“Miss Y/N, we need to be sure that the informations you’ll collect for us will stay inside of this house and never go anywhere else or reach any other ears.” Said for the first time since he entered in the room Lucius, who was watching her carefully. 

A light smile flourished on the corner of her mouth and she put her gaze on the boy who seemed to finally got it. “Why did you point it out?” He asked incredulously. Alfred nodded at his question, not understanding himself. Y/N shrugged one of her shoulder. 

“Eh, looks like you’ve got a strong charm here Mister Wayne and bewitched me, or maybe it was your lovely butler. You know I like my men like I like my tea, hot and British”, She mocked, earning a big scoff from Alfred. 

“Who are you kidding! Your man his a freaking homicidal maniac!” Screamed Selina from the door, making Bruce take an involuntary step back and Alfred lifting his knife. She sighed and leaned on the side to throw her a “really?!” glance. “Girl, be cute and hush until you learn how to stand for yourself and not hissing like an angry cat, 10 meters away from your mark.” Y/N said. 

“What is she talking about?” Demanded to know Alfred. Again, the woman shrugged one shoulder. “Nothing you have to worry about. For now”, she grinned. She didn’t let them lose anymore time and put one of her hand in the air in direction of the heir. “Now sweetheart, would you please be a dear and show me where I can start to work?” She mocked a bit. 

It took her five good hours and the help of Lucius to finally manage to crack the system and export all Wayne’s datas. “Do you even know what you are looking for my sweet boy?” She asked while unplugging Lucius’ hard drive. 

“I’m not sure, irregularities, financial and corporate malpractices...” He answered. She blinked and nodded, lifting from her chair and stretching like a cat. Speaking of one, Selina refused to approach her all along, pouting in a corner. 

“Well, young Wayne, I think I’ve done my part here, so out of respect for your time, I’ll take my leave.” She said with a small grin. Bruce nodded softly. “Thank you for your help, Ms Y/N. It was very kind of you.” He said. 

She laughed hard at his words. “Kid, you gave me a fortune for that, I did what you’ve paid me for. There is no place for kindness in this city or in business in general. Keep it for your butler or, in a certain measure, for your kitty cat, here”, she pointed. She then turned on her heels to walk to the door, but had to stop when Bruce spoke again. “Say what you want, it was kindness. And I thank you for that.” 

She didn’t turn nor made a move to acknowledge his words and get out of the room, letting Alfred guide her to the main doors. She had to raise a brow when he extended his hand between them. 

“You are more similar to Mary Crowley than I thought, Ms Y/N... I don’t really know if I appreciate you or not but my young master was right. What you did today was kind. You could have sold the information but you warned him, and for that I humbly want to thank you.” Said the man.

The woman watched his hand a long second before taking it and shaking it. “Don’t act so stiff and sound so dramatic Mister Carson. Know that I, for certain, liked our little chit chat very much, you’re a funny one. Try to stay alive and in shape with your small child-adult master, you two sure are quite the interesting duo.” She said, earning a little scoff.

-- 

“Where were you?” Asked a voice from behind her when she entered her room, after a good scolding from Falcone for the shooting between Victor and her in the morning. “Didn’t you stalk me dearest?” She asked mockingly. “Well Don Falcone didn’t want to risk me putting a bullet in your thigh, so he ordered me to let you be for the day.” He said. 

She hummed pensively while starting to undress under his heavy gaze. “I told you I was going to a fancy mansion to see a rich heir.” She finally answered, while clicking her tongue when her necklace wouldn’t opened. 

Two gloved hands replaced hers but she quickly sized them, before he could do anything. “Will you try to choke me to death like this viper of Liza?” She asked mockingly but with a tint of seriousness in her eyes. 

Victor lifted one of his brows and stared at her. “Would prefer to do it with bare hands. To feel your pulse against my palms and your life quitting your body slowly.” He said flatly, freeing his hands and helping her to take the jewel off. “Such a poet, dearest, you definitely know how to make me feel weak in the knees”, she sassed. 

Zsasz closed the tiny distance between them, snaking both of his arms around her waist, pressing her against his front and whispered against her ear: “Last time I ask gently, sweetness.” As on cue, she felt a cold blade against her bare skin, which makes her shivered. “Wayne’s manor.” She said, also snaking her arms but around his neck and pressing him even harder against her. 

“Oh.” He said. “What for?” The blade wasn’t as much threatening, but she felt it graze her skin softly. “Little hacking job, well paid, should be able to buy tons of fancy suits, jackets, accessories and guns to my lover, he has quite a pronounced taste for luxury, maybe I spoil him too much” She mocked, also grazing her sharp nails against his neck. 

She saw his infamous boyish grin before he brutally lifts her, and throw her on the bed, being on her in a second. “And what did you find?” He questioned. She trapped his hips between her thighs and crossed her ankles behind his back. “Nothing interesting for the family.” She simply said without mentioning the details, but it was the truth thought. “The heir and butler were quite endearing. Cute boy, funny and cute old man”, she provoked and had to leaned her head a bit on the right to dodge Victor’s blade which would have cut her left cheek a bit. She couldn’t help herself and chuckled. 

He didn’t move it though. In fact he was very still, as a warning sign for her: if what you’re saying next doesn’t please me, you may bleed. She put a hand on his right cheek then slide it behind his neck to guide him against her lips. “Don’t be jealous dearest, I’ll always fall for the bad guy”, She whispered before kissing him hungrily. 

--

Hope you liked it! 🥰     

[lucis-dove]

S.I.N - Soulmates in nature {1}

Series summary; The boys struck a deal with Lucifer, a deal that allows him to stay in the bunker. How will not only they, but you cope with an archangel, the devil nonetheless, roaming around the space? Especially as you seem to notice something no-one else does, his wings. You could see the devil’s wings.

Pairing: Lucifer x reader  

Rating: Mature

CHAPTER NO/ONESHOT: Chapter 1/23

Word; 4.600

Warnings; Swearing, Lucifer being Lucifer

Author; @the-goddess-of-mischief-writing

A/N: AHHH YES I am SO exited to post this new series for ma pretty boy Luci! This is a soulmate!au I’ve always wanted to write and seeing as I’m a sucker for both angel wings, enemies to lovers and sass, it was pretty clear who this series would be with. So hopefully you guys are as exited as I am, because... well you're getting this series wheatear you want it or not. PSA; if you wanna be tagged in the series send me and ask!

SERIES MASTERLIST

Usually knocking on the bunker door was enough to draw at least one of the three men's attention from inside. Thus you knew, essentially because it had woken you up from sleep more than once, that the metal echo resonated throughout the old men of letters residence. Although now it seemed everyone inside had become deaf, hence no-one came and met you.

Perhaps you could've guessed Dean wouldn't have come, especially if he had dozed off. The hunter slept like a log when he finally could rest. Sam and Cas, you were both surprised by hadn't heard, however. 

The younger Winchester usually worked late in the library, sometimes falling asleep while doing so, though he would most likely wake up, seeing as he was a light sleeper. The angel didn't even require sleep in the first place, so he usually roamed around the bunker if he was there. And as long as he hadn't gotten som distress call from heaven, he should still be there.

"Pure gentleman the lot. Here I go on a supply run and they can't even help their sorry asses to open the door", you muttered. 

Yes, you were annoyed by their behaviour, but not angry. Thus, you hadn't forgotten the key. You could still feel it in your back pocket where you put it when leaving the bunker earlier, so you weren't locked out. However, reaching it was the problem.

Your arms were full of grocery bags, brimming with whatever supplies that been written on the list you gotten before leaving the bunker. It was almost impossible to see the lock on the door over their rims, but even harder would it be to juggle the bags, trying not to drop anything, while fishing up the key and unlocking the door. Regardless, it seemed you would need to do just that, as none of the guys would come and help you.

Balancing on one leg, you raised your knee to place the bags you held in your right arm on it, letting them lean against your chest for support. Hurriedly you reached for the key before losing your balance and alarming probably half of Lebanon of your failure. By some miracle, you also succeeded without having to sacrifice Dean's pie or bears for the matter.

Huffing slightly, you pushed open the heavy door with your hip. You had prepared to call out for the guys as it glided open, yet something stopped you, the echo of multiple arguing voices. You recognised Sam, Dean and Cas's, yet there was one more.

Quickly closing the door behind you with your foot, you made a mental note to come back and lock it as soon as you'd figure out what caused the dispute downstairs.

Hurrying down, all while trying not to fall, you tried placing the foreign voice. It couldn't be Rowena because whoever speaking wasn't a woman. Though neither could it be Crowley because the demon owned a very distinctive British accent, something this person didn't. What snapped you out of trying to identify the voice, though, was a loud bang.

You felt how your body reacted before your mind. Instantly you set the grocery bags on the table in the command centre, not caring if they fell and any of the stuff got harmed anymore.

Rushing forward, you unholstered the gun from your waistband as you swiftly climbed the two stair steps up to the threshold of the library in one. However, there you suddenly halted. Thus, instead of seeing one or more of your friends hurt, there was a whole other scene greeting you.

None of the brothers was injured, nor your angel friend. Nevertheless, everything didn't seem to be all right. Sam looked more than a little jittery, the thin line his lips had formed signifying a nervous fear. Cas had a deep frown etched between his brows, his hands clenched at his side, seemingly trying to restrain himself. Dean's fist rested upon the table, which you guessed probably remained there as a cause of slamming it down, something that would explain the sound you heard earlier. Along with this, his body was rigid enough that you could tell he was ready to murder someone. And when your eyes finally followed all of their gazes, you understood why.

There in all his might, stood none other than Lucifer.

Your eyes widened. Even though knowing about the archangel, you'd never met him, only heard about him from Sam, Dean and Cas. You'd never even seen a picture of the infamous devil. So how could you know it was him?

Quickly you declared yourself foolish for thinking it was because of the feeling in your stomach. Obviously, you must have missed the most apparent reasons, even though you didn't understand how you could've.

The sensation of celestial power surging in the room was more than noticeable. It reminded you of what you'd felt each time Cas had been in your presence during your early stay in the bunker, albeit much more powerful and thus, also more palpable. Then it was the essential clue showing it was nothing else than an angel standing before you.

You found your eyes unable to stay in one place, gaze flickering all over the archangel standing half a room away. Although not only him, but the entities outstretched from his sides. You would never call the bunker dim, if not the emergency protocol was activated that was. But the white, close to opalescent, wings seemed to illuminate the room with their soft white, no, pure light.

Your mouth opened and closed as you tried asking the people, still unknowing of your presence, what was going on. However, no sound escaped you, something you already knew why for. Your breath had been stolen the moment you started gazing at the devil's wings.

It was almost mesmerising, the way they shuffled and jerked as naturally as one's hands would do to emphasise whatever Lucifer said. You had no idea what it was, all of their voices an echo in the distance, yet you knew it couldn't have been a friendly topic. Hence, the feathers forming the appendages ruffled and gave the impression of increasing in size multiple times. You understood that it was a move to intimidate. However, you felt your eyes narrow because that wasn't the reaction it elicited from you.

Instead of paying attention to Lucifer growing more than twice his side when stretching his wings, you focused on how the violent shifting made an iridescent wave flicker over them. An odd calmness, closely followed by surprise, surged through your body. It was foreign, almost as if it wasn't your own feelings.

The sudden rush of emotions served as a reminder of who stood before you and most possibly also effected you with his powers, whatever they could be. It enabled you to find your voice once more and ask the question you had wordlessly wondered this whole time.

"What the fuck is the devil doing here?"

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

It had been weeks ago now. Firstly weeks since you had interrupted whatever discussion that had taken place between Sam, Dean, Cas and surprisingly Lucifer. Secondly, weeks since you got to know what the boys had argued about, though not only that but also done, they'd struck a deal with the devil. And finally, weeks since the unarguably most annoying, not only archangel but angel in existence had come to stay in the bunker.

It was out of your mind how the boys could've decided it would be wise letting Lucifer stay with all of you, something you weren't shy to remind them of either. You had used the argument 'you let him stay' on many occasions, which in turn had let you win many of said arguments. However, one thing you couldn't claim you'd won was alone time.

Since the archangel had come to stay with you and no one truly trusted him, it always meant someone was on devil watching duty. It wasn't so that one of you followed him around each and every step he took, but more kept an extra watchful eye on him when others were on a hunt. 

Up until now, thankfully, he hadn't tried murdering anyone, not inside or outside the bunker. Though, that didn't mean the want didn't exist, perhaps more from others than himself.

During the week's Lucifer resided along with you, you'd begun to understand why the Winchester's had warned you for speaking with him. Not only did he have an unarguable talent at twisting his words for his own gain, whatever that could be. But he also mastered the art of riling people up.

Sam and Dean's, in your opinion, generally short fuse, turned out to be even easier to ignite than you previously thought, much thanks to the constant taunting and snide remarks from Lucifer. 

You'd assumed they would've been partly used to it, hence having dealt with him numerous times before, yet so wasn't the case. It was only lucky you were used to breaking things up between the brothers, even Cas and them. Thus nowadays, you found yourself increasingly often pushing one of them away from the archangel.

It wasn't often it was the other way around, but even you 'with your infinite patience and snark' as Dean once said, had lost your head once or twice. How couldn't you? There was never a day you found Lucifer without a smirk and brow challengingly arched. 

Neither was there ever a day when he didn't try to pull a reaction from you or gain your attention for the matter. He was a pest, without using too kind words. But there was no discussion, compared to Sam and Dean, uncharacteristic enough also Cas, you were the most level headed around the devil.

Perhaps it was good that at least one of you weren't as quick to get mad around him, but it also was a curse. Ever since your first interaction with the archangel, it seemed he had taken it as his mission to frequently bother you. 

And it was something which he was given a substantial amount of time doing. Thus, regarding the bunker always was in the best shape when you'd stayed behind from a hunt to watch over him, you were often the first choice to babysit him, like now.

The boys had left early this morning to search for a supposed vampire nest in a nearby town. Usually, you thought it was nice having the bunker for yourself, as it meant you could have some alone time. Although now, with the devil on a visit, it was damn near impossible.

Knowing they were away, you'd chosen to skip breakfast purely to avoid bickering with the archangel. He was always more annoying when he knew none of the guys potentially could come to your rescue. 

Typically, you could hold your ground against the devil, perhaps the reason he found it so entertaining to bother you. But having been woken by Cas, who'd let you know they headed out, too early in the morning, you weren't clear enough in the head to be in Lucifer's presence.

It wasn't only due to your inability to form proper responses that close to waking up, you tried avoiding him, but also because your sleep-addled body wouldn't act as you wanted. Hence, you knew there was an increased chance you would expose your still kept secret. That you could see the archangel's wings.

Even though you now sat undisturbed, for the moment, in the library, cleaning your guns. You felt the same wave of confusion, even the tiniest hint of curiosity, enter your body when thinking about Lucifer's wings. 

Those emotions, the one's you never could explain, but always became near nauseous when feeling because it felt like every single emotion hit you at the same time. You noticed got more prominent when the angel was in your vicinity or mind for the matter, both of which you found present annoyingly often.

Still, no matter how much you wondered about it or saw it in person, you had no idea why you could see the iridescent entities and the glow-like illumination they perpetually emitted.

You knew you could ask Cas, who most definitely would have the answer to why the devil's wings were visible, but it was in your nature not to ask for help if not absolutely necessary. You were a hunter, who more times than not, pride yourself on your ability to figure out things on your own. It's what has kept you alive for this long, after all.

Therefore having a problem you couldn't solve, especially after searching through most books in the library the few times you didn't have a devil looming over your shoulder and even then finding nothing, bugged you considerably.

It was because of this you had learned yourself to grow used to it. That despite your curiosity and uncommonly desire to ask, refrain from staring at Lucifer's wings or ever bring up the matter. Nevertheless, you'd learned how to at least sate your wonder the slightest bit.

It was primarily during the first week of his stay it happened. That your gaze often had snapped up to follow him, fingers twitching to reach for an angel blade, every time you witnessed the devil roaming the halls of the bunker. 

While it was a reaction that always had made him smirk, it gave you an excuse to study him. Albeit given a chance to swiftly glide your gaze over his wings, your eyes never lingered more than what he could interpret as a hunter's vigilance to the number one evil being.

Nevertheless, even if you wanted it or not, you'd found that the small number of opportunities were too sparse to actually get to know something. Thus, you excused your action of sneakily glancing at the oddity that labelled Lucifer an angel each time his back was turned to you. 

It was something you still did, but with more and more caution, hence you feared he suddenly would catch on. But so far, he hadn't and thanks to this, you'd learned enough to know that keeping in mind how his wings moved or acted, you weren't sure how to word it, was a valuable indication of his emotions.

Despite your fixation on his wings these past weeks, you sometimes felt it was weird you paid as much attention to the matter as you did. Hence no-one else even cared about Lucifer's wings. It was as if only you could see them, something you not until the last few days understood also was the case.

The thought hit you from nowhere and without having to think twice about it, you also had known it was true. 'If either Sam or Dean would've seen them, they would've made a scene out of it'. What, or rather who, you had dwelled on more, however, was Cas. 

Your angel friend was harder to place in the realisation you had about the brothers, solely because you figured he must be used to seeing angel wings, so perhaps he wouldn't care as much. Although, a few days ago, you grasped the fact that not even he could see or sense them.

It was a memory you had replayed in your mind several times already. Twisted and turned to see if you could've perceived it wrong, but every time you looked back on the event, it always followed the same lines.

You and Cas had been sitting in the library, doing some research while Sam and Dean were away on a hunt when Lucifer had strolled in. You hadn't spared him more than a glance. On any other day, he wouldn't have been content with that. However, his aim wasn't on you now, but the angel in your company.

Albeit the bickering had begun one-sided, Lucifer more talking to himself than any of you, Cas soon became tired with his quips and started answering them. You knew it was a lost cause as soon as he did, but you didn't really pay it any thought, entirely immersed in the book before you. Yet, what caught your attention, in the end, was when the room had fallen completely silent.

You'd glanced up, only to see the two angel's standing face to face. You hadn't heard Cas get up from his chair, but that didn't matter now, you still knew something was up. It was when the palpable tension grew thick enough you could cut it, a tick entering Cas's jaw and Lucifer's wings flexed, that you shook your head and stood from your chair.

You hadn't hesitated when walking forward, neither when gripping Cas's shoulder and gently tugging it backwards. Not even when he didn't step back did you regret your action, though it had made you sigh. 

Repositioning yourself, so you stood partly in-between them, you'd put a hand on his chest. 'Cas, time to actually behave like an angel', you'd muttered while starting to push him backwards, but the movement ceased when you heard a chuckle from behind.

With a raised brow, you'd looked over your shoulder. There you saw a grinning Lucifer, seemingly enjoying he had succeeded with drawing Cas far enough from his place beside you that you needed to stop the angel from doing anything everyone would regret.

Rolling your eyes, you'd continued nudging Cas backwards, slowly starting to turn to face the dark-haired angel. However, as you saw something move in the corner of your eye and a sudden coldness followed by a flushed sensation surged through you, making you recoil from the feeling, your head moved faster than initially.

What you'd witnessed, or felt, was Lucifer's wing, or at least some of his feathers, brush along your and Cas's side. It seemed it hadn't been intentional, as the archangel's appendage quickly twitched away from the two of you. Yet, you didn't concentrate on his retreating wing, nor the want to keep following them with your gaze, but that Cas hadn't even acknowledged the touch. 

He hadn't flinched as you'd done. Hopefully, suppressed enough for none of them to notice, which you guess you had as they didn't pay any attention to you. Cas eyes had, in fact, never even left Lucifer over your shoulder.

"Seems like your head is somewhere else".

"And you're staring", the response to the comment which snapped you out of your memory came by instinct. Probably was it accurate as well, as it felt like someone had burned the mark of hell on your forehead. Raising your gaze to see if you were indeed correct, your eyes immediately found Lucifer's.

"I'm looking", he stated.

"Looking you do at someone when they speak. Staring you do when someone is silent and don't' pay attention to you", before answering, the archangel cocked his head.

"Don't act like that. You should be delighted that out of everyone living here, you're the one I would like to torture the least", it sounded like Lucifer told you a secret, the way he worded it, but you couldn't more than huff at his statement. Looking down on your gun, which you now noticed had been spotlessly cleaned while your mind wandered, you swiftly started to reassemble it.

"And you should be delighted, that when the day of killing you comes, it will be quick, so I get your annoying ass out of my life", you turned the metal weapon in your hand over, once, twice, before raising the reconstructed gun and aiming it his way. Though most would've been, at least, slightly intimidated by the action, you only saw Lucifer's smirk widen at the other end of the barrel.

"Oh, it got guts too. However, I have to break it to you. That won't do anything to me", you rolled your eyes at the arrogance in the archangel's voice as he gestured between your weapon and himself.

"I know, but hopefully, it will still hurt like a bitch", you closed an eye, gripping the gun with two hands while trailing it upwards, so it pointed at his head rather than his chest. Hooking of the safety, you quickly pressed the trigger.

You knew the deal the boys had done with the devil included him being able to stay in the bunker, away from whatever haunted him from hell, in exchange for a future favour. Therefore, it was never your intention to shoot him, even if you numerous times fantasised about it. Thus, you intentionally hadn't loaded the clip of the gun.

Even though you never would admit it, the reason you gave the archangel even the slightest bit of your attention, was because you, much like he, enjoyed picking at the counterpart. If someone asked why you wouldn't be able to tell. Because realistically, why would a human step up against an archangel, the devil nonetheless?

What you knew, though, was that thanks to regularly arguing with the archangel, it allowed you to discover the cracks in Lucifer's well-manufactured armour to knock him down a pedestal or two from his high horse. It wasn't often you succeeded, but sometimes you found the right words or actions to do it, something you did this time.

Even though your action was followed by an empty snap, rather than a bullet flying through the air, it brought a physical reaction from him, but one that wasn't of his usual dominant bearing but an unintentional one. One he, in reality, didn't want to show you.

The devil had flinched, his wings curling around him slightly.

His response made you bite back a smirk. Although the chuckle bubbled up in your throat, you couldn't stop. As soon as the sound reached Lucifer, he quickly returned to his former position, albeit it was different. In the edge of your vision, you saw his wings tense. He knew he'd slipped up.

"If I remember right, our deal meant that I could stay here safely".

"You mean the deal you didn't strike with me, but Sam and Dean?" You retorted while lowering the magnum. "If so, I remember that the deal would break if you didn't leave me alone. How's that going for you?" You saw how one of Lucifer's eyebrows raised and his head titled. However, compared to Cas, his take on the action wasn't one of confusion but rather a dare.

Now, instead of keep on lingering passively by the threshold of the library, Lucifer strode forward. Given more space, his wings stretched out. The movement made the iridescence covering them noticeable and much like all the other times, a calmness spread through you instead of intimidation.

"You know, with the snap of my fingers, I can make you disintegrate", his voice was low, although the real threat didn't lay in his words, but his moves. The archangel had raised his hand, fingers pressed tightly together. Merely slipping with his digits would make a snap echo powerfully.

"And why haven't you done it already then?" You questioned, immediately noticing how the edge in his display dissolved.

"I wouldn't want to break my favourite toy, now would I?" Though noticing the childlike pout that followed his words, you knew this wasn't the cause Lucifer lowered his hands for.

You saw it in his eyes, in his wings. You felt the cause of it. However, at the same time, it was so evident, you couldn't place it. It was a lingering knowledge, much like intuition, in the back of your mind.

Writing it off as your hunter instinct, you didn't ponder at the feeling for any longer, solely noting it was the same one that enabled you to spend a substantial more amount of time in his presence than others without going insane.

"Who said I was your toy?" You hummed, quirking a brow at him, knowing by now if he would've wanted the arguing to end, his threat wouldn't have been hallow. "Maybe you're mine?" 

You raised your hand, which all this time had clutched the gun resting on the table, thus making the weapon also join the movement. If it would've been loaded, your moves hadn't been as careless. But now, you beckoned the gleaming metal piece from him to you.

"Is that so?" There was a flash in his eyes as he said this before he commenced walking forward. His arms were now folded, his pointer finger tapping his lips each slow step he took. "It seemed to have passed your awareness that I bow to no one", his lips became decorated with a grin as he stopped his fingers from toying with his lips.

"Why are you on the run from hell then?" He stopped in his tracks, eyes narrowing. 

Before Lucifer could answer with what you knew would be a bite, rather than bark, the sound of the bunker door opened, closely followed by Sam, Dean and Cas's voices filling the air.

"Hey Y/N, you alive?" You heard Dean call as they started to descended the stairs. Smirking at the devil, you raised an eyebrow. It was your time to dare him to do anything.

Lucifer's face contorted into a scowl before he, in the blink of an eye, was gone. Nothing more than a sound of flapping wings inclined he'd been there at all. You momentarily gazed at the spot he had occupied before turning to look to the entry of the library.

"I'm as alive as I can be", you answered the older Winchester while spotting them walk through the commander central.

"Well, seeing as you babysit the devil, that counts as something", your lips tugged into a smile as you met the hunter's eyes, which like always, seemed more tired after than before a case.

"Perhaps, but I much rather prefer if he wasn't here in the first place", despite the game, if you even could call it that perhaps a better word would be survival tactic, you had with Lucifer, the archangel was a prick, with capital P. "How did the hunt go?" 

You switched the subject, however, didn't get the immediate joyful answer you thought you would. Instead, you were met by an annoyed gruff from the Dean as he threw his duffel bag on the table you sat at before swiftly taking a seat in the chair opposite you. Raising a questioning eyebrow at his actions, you switched from looking at him to Sam.

"Turns out, that nest we found wasn't vampires", he informed you, which made your eyebrows narrow.

"Werewolves?" You asked confused. Majorly because, from the looks of it, it had been a clear vamp case.

"Demons", Cas's answer would've made you choke on water if you had drunk any. Staring at the angel, he simply gave half a nod to clarify that you indeed had heard right.

"The black-eyed bastards were waiting for us when we came, ambushed us as soon as we stepped a foot in the place", Dean said, irritation evident in his voice.

"Since when do demons role-play as vampires?" Your question made Sam's lip tug into a smile, while his brother simply replayed with a continuous grumpy 'no idea'.

"That wasn't the weirdest thing...", seeing how the taller brother shuffled, you switched to look at him. Immediately you tilted your head at Sam, observing him as he started to rummage through his duffel bag. Not until he pulled out his demon blade, which was unusually clean from a demon hunt, did he continue. "We didn't even have to use these because they smoked out as soon as they saw it was only us".

"Only you? Usually, demons and every other supernatural creature are stalking you three specifically", you motioned to the men in front of you. "Who else could they want?" None of them gave you a clear answer, only shrugs.

Something felt wrong with the whole situation and formed an uneasy feeling in the pit of your stomach. It had been long since you encountered the spawns of hell, and while you weren't surprised the time eventually had come again, there was something about it happening this way that wasn't natural.

[phynali]

another post about the secret good supernatural that lives in my brain

where’s that interview or convention quote from mark sheppard about how he wishes Rowena had been Crowley’s ex-wife instead of mother?

i absolutely love Rowena and Ruth O’Connell did an incredible and fantastic job with bringing her to life, but i do feel like that’s the world’s most Valid critique. 

and i kind of get that the show’s later seasons really like to dabble in the parenthood narratives, with Rowena, with Mary, with the Jack storyline, with Lebanon. what does it mean to be a mother/father/parent, and how do we do the best by our kids? what happens when we fuck up? what happens when we’re selfish? how do experience being a person and a parent when those are in conflict?

but i don’t see how making rowena into crowley’s mother really added to any of those conversations, tbh. 

if anything, them as exes would give a lot more weight to her, y’know, killing her (other) son at the end of s10. obviously she’s got this “i hate that i can’t hate you i hate that i love you” maternal thing with crowley but what if she was killing her son and crowley was thinking about the kid crowley had all those years ago who also gets resurrected when rowena is around and who crowley has to let go of, right? i mean what if that was both their kid? what if they had to mutually watch him die? what if that’s why they hated each other in the first place? what if crowley made that stupid childish deal he did just to punish himself for rowena leaving him after their son died and he blamed himself and meanwhile rowena went and got herself invested in witchcraft in a vain and failed attempt to bring their kid back and everything about them went to shit - 

god, i want this so badly now?

and i see why they might not have wanted to reduce all their stories to siblings or lovers, why other dynamics keep things fresh, but i think exes who still get along but also can’t stand one another but also love one another but are never, ever getting back together and that’s for the best but also if you lay a finger on him i’ll kill you only i get to kill him - 

well i just think that’s a bit more interesting than what we got? especially with lucifer thrown in the mix and the obvious infidelity feelings. right now lucifer and rowena reads as abusive romance but they didn’t lean into any paternal dynamic between lucifer and crowley, like it’s just pure debasement on an equal level, and they obviously just did not know or were too afraid to tap the very disturbing familial parallels they could have setup there so why even paint themselves into that corner? 

why not setup lucifer and crowley as romantic rivals, neither of whom actually want rowena or a relationship but both of whom play tug-of-war with the loyalty and allegiance of women because they’re awful people (devils, literally) and why not have rowena’s narrative involve rejecting all of that bullshit and overcoming the inherent misogyny. not to say there’s not some of that in her maternal storyline as well but it’s - empty? in comparison (by which i mean delivery). and much better explored with mary in s12.

and the samwena vibes would be so fascinating!! if rowena was crowley’s ex the show might have actually dug into crowley and sam’s super interesting and massively under-explored dynamic because the weird jealousy and territorialness would be so goddamn fun!! 

“no i don’t want to be with her but no she is not allowed to flirt with you what the hell do you mean you’re the one destined to kill her oh fucking no you aren’t that is my job she broke my heart and i am the king of hell, not you mr boy-fucking-king-who-abdicated so you will pry the right to kill her from my cold dead demon hands i will save her life just so you don’t get to kill her you bastard - “

come on! 

right now samwena and crowley was super under-explored as it is, and at minimum we 150% deserved crowley being cheeky with sam for having chemistry with his mother and sam being a little flustered/unsure how to respond while inevitably sassing crowley back. please. it would be so weird. you cannot convince me that the crowley we know and love wouldn’t have deliberately flirted with mary just to see sam’s eye twitch and for dean to break a tooth by tensing his jaw too hard. i mean it wouldn’t work because mary hates demons almost as much as sam but it would be in character and it would delight me, personally.

anyway i also saw someone else comment that when rowena was introduced the witchcraft in the show went from super fucking dark (how it was introduced to the show in kripke era, then left mostly untouched in s6-9) to pretty purple sparkles and tbh that’s so true and also dull? like rowena was legit introduced in the process of reading a book and drinking tea (or wine?) while two guys bled out slowly on her ceiling held up by her dark af magic and by the end she’s just ...  doing spells that sam and dean have no moral compunctions about using? dabb do you know what horror is as a genre why did you change the genre of this show in its final 3 seasons? why did we not get to retain the dark and demonic aspects of witchcraft? 

i am so disappointed at how they watered down so many different things with rowena and final note she absolutely should have fucked sam literally any other character behind the bookstacks except gabriel omg.

[idreamofplaid]

Always with You

Summary: Sam is about to finish the last trial that will close the gates of hell. The reader has some very good reasons why he shouldn’t.

Characters: Sam x angel!Reader; Dean and Crowley mentioned

Word Count: 876

A/N: I found another fic in my docs. Still going through them to complete my Masterlist. There are spoilers for Season 8.

He was sitting in the back of the little abandoned church, shoulders bent, oblivious to your presence. Sam wasn’t aware of you, but you knew everything there was to know about him. You had watched over him from the moment Azazel first dropped the demon blood into his mouth. You’d been with him as he grew up feeling like a freak, saddened that you’d been unable to stop the events in his life that had hurt him so deeply.

Maybe you couldn’t stop them, but you could temper his grief, ease his despair and pull him back from the precipice when it was required. In his darkest times, you’d held him in the night invisible to his eyes; but his soul had felt you. His heart had found some peace at the touch of your unseen fingers combing through his hair. 

You had comforted him when Jessica died, whispering into his mind, telling him his pain would eventually pass. Sam had been terrified in the months leading up to the apocalypse, afraid of who he was and what he was meant to do, scared of going to hell. It was your connection to him that helped him survive being trapped in the cage with Lucifer. You knew everything he had endured there, things he pushed down even now and would not acknowledge.

Sam had always believed, needed to believe. He had thought angels were guardians and protectors. It his mind, they were pure and unselfish. Until, he found out most of them weren’t. You weren’t most, and it was time to reveal yourself to him. Your days as an angel were numbered. You were going to renounce your wings and become human for this man. You had seen your future with Sam, and now you were going to share it with him, give him a reason to live.

You walked to the pew where Sam sat and stood at the end of it watching him. These trials had taken a toll on him. He was tired, weak, and his bloodshot eyes leaked tears. Quietly, you materialized so he might see you. You stepped between the pews to get closer and knelt before him. Tentatively, you lay your hand on top of his. Sam jumped slightly at the unexpected touch. For the first time, he could physically feel you.

His exhausted eyes were still beautiful. You smiled and brushed your fingers lightly over his knuckles. “Hi, Sam.” His eyes held questions, but he wasn’t afraid. You raised your hand to his cheek cupped the side of his face. “My brave love.” 

“Wh...who are you? Are you real?” His brow furrowed, his mind almost as tired as his body.

“Yes, Sam. I’m real.” He closed his eyes and turned his face into your touch. He knew it, recognized it. “That’s it, my darling. I’m here.” You gave him a moment of peace listening to him breathe. “Sam, I need you to listen to me. Open your eyes.” You took both his hands in yours. “You can’t keep doing what you’re doing, Sam. You’ll die, and I need you to live. They need you to live.”

You touched your finger to his head so he could see what you already knew. He closed his eyes again, and after a brief look of confusion a smile crossed his face. “She’s...she’s...” His voice was quiet with emotion.

“She’s yours, Sam. Ours. Our first born.” When his eyes blinked open, he tilted his head studying you. “You know what I’m saying is true.” You wiped a tear from his cheek. “She’s your little girl. Your first little girl. She’s going to have a sister, and a brother too, but only if you stop. Please, Sam.”

Sam started crying again. “I have to close the gates of Hell.”

“No, sweetheart. There is still something more important for you to do.”

Sam turned his face from you. “I don’t. I don’t understand.”

You took his chin in your hand and turned him back to you. “Not now, but you will. Trust me. Dean will be here soon, and you need to listen to him. Let him help you. Whatever it takes, let him help you. You won’t see me again for many years, but I’ll be by your side as always. I’m always with you, Sam.”

The Impala’s engine rumbled outside announcing Dean’s arrival. Your time with Sam was running out. “You are a good man, Sam Winchester.” You lifted his bandaged arm to place his hand over his heart. “Carry that knowledge here.” You knew he wouldn’t consciously remember what had just happened between you, but you could visit him in his dreams and once again be with him in the nights until the time came you would meet again. 

You kissed him tenderly as Dean came bursting into the back of the church. “I love you, Sam.” Dean didn’t see you as you stood and once more disappeared, neither had the now partially human demon sitting in the front of the sanctuary seen what just transpired between you and Sam. You walked back down the aisle past Dean, taking one last look over your shoulder at the man who was the reason you had been made all those millennia ago.

Everything: @gambitwinchester @princessmisery666 @peridottea91 @logical-princey @beenlovingromansincedayoneish @fangirlxwritesx67 @waywardbaby @atc74 @tumbler-tidbits @fandom-princess-forevermore @terrarium-jpeg @crashdevlin @jules-1999 @cosicas-cuquis @sammyimpala-67 @queenoftheunderdark @dean-winchesters-bacon @timelordy-fangirl2 @sweetness47 @hobby27 @awesomesusiebstuff @kickingitwithkirk @sandlee44 @supernaturalgrandma @volleyballer519 @kdfrqqg @lizette50 @daisymoder72 @sorenmarie87 @lovealways-j @mrswhozeewhatsis @spnbaby-67 @wayward-and-worn @asthesunwentdown @vulgar-library @petitgateau911 @thinkinghardhardlythinking 

Sam/Jared: @girl-next-door-writes​ @stunudo​ @feelmyroarrrr​ @idabbleincrazy​ @evansrogerskitten​ @focusonspn​ @autumninavonlea​ @durinsbride​ @deansyahtzee​ @waywardnerd67​ @fullmooner​ @sams-sass​ @beskaradberoya​ @fromsamwtocordellw​