#critique and tips to improve

[itsawildsaltychip]

100 Epitaphs remix || @nopanamaman

(Copy and pasting the desc on here!!! 😋)

I spedran this remix yesterday for 3 hours at 5 AM and oh my god did I rush it. I did have fun working on this but in all honesty i deadass fell asleep after I finish it 💀💀 I kinda like how this song sounds but like,,, it's a bit barebones.... BUT i guess not REALLY since after learning how to properly use soundloops and sfx I think those things kinda made this a bit... Nicer sounding????

ALSO ALSO ALSO PLEASE PLEASEEEEE LISTEN TO FERRY'S MUSIC!!! IF YALL LIKE INDIE ROCK UHHHHH FL STUDIO MUSIC WITH VOCALOID STUFF THEN ID THINK YOU'D LIKE IT

[sugarplanet]

"Did I Draw That?" Critiquing Your Old Art and Tracking Your Growth

You’ve probably had that feeling before where nothing you’re drawing is quite up to snuff or you can’t seem to make anything you’re particularly proud of. Art blocks and creative ruts are a plague to most artists and sometimes it feels like you’ll be sick with them forever. As someone who can find it hard to draw or post when I’ve lost any sense of motivation because “my art isn’t good enough, I don’t have any followers,” I’ve made myself work harder on redirecting towards more productive means of self-critique and analysis to keep me from self-destructing over my craft. One way I go about self-analysis or finding inspiration again is by comparing myself to myself instead of to artists that are years ahead or behind me so I can see how I’ve been taking to the efforts I’ve made to improve while, where I want to improve more, and get reacquainted with my art in a more personal sense instead of looking at numbers of likes or views on post next to other people’s art.

I found an exercise I did back in 2021 where I was practicing some lighting and paint stoke techniques free hand, really experimenting with the most innocuous thing I could think of at the time; a lady holding a cat. I did the first piece on a whim, making things a little flat, and then actively revisited the piece a couple months later with some sharper brushes, a more expressive subject, and greater contrast in color and value. I even added a simple background to make things a little more interesting. I did like some things in both pieces (the color palate and understated texture I got in the first piece and the greater energy in the later piece) but I know there was plenty of room for improvement (mainly the anatomy and the blobbiness of the cats). Looking at the pieces, I tried to find the mindset I had when I worked on them and think about my approach; as flawed as they were, I liked them a little still and wanted to try one more time to see if I could make something out of it.

This piece feels more disciplined than the others with a background and stronger anatomy but does employ some of the spirit of the first two in the painterly approach.

It’s nice being able to look fondly back on your own art, but it can be a little worrying at times liking your old art while also combating feelings of dissatisfaction with your current output. There’s a belief that one mark of improvement is being able to look back on your own work and reflexively gag over how wonky the quality is. With that logic, you liking your old work at all must mean that you either haven��t improved at all or you can’t see how you’ve improved. To counteract that kind of downward spiral-inducing line of thought, understand that part of becoming a better (and happier) artist is being able to see your skill and improvement while also being able to spot your shortcomings and improving them without fixating them. I wasn’t always able to look at my own art objectively and redo an older concept or update a piece so easily but understanding the value in all of your work, even the super dated and wonky stuff, does a service to your craft (not to mention your self-esteem.)

If you feel like your work isn’t up to snuff or if the dredges of stagnation are biting at your toes, try sifting through your portfolio or sketches or psd files of over stuffed canvases with hundreds of layers (I’m not the only one that does that, right?) and see what you’ve found since before you first discovered that new brush set or around a time when you were last energetic in your work or even something from this time last year. It’s best to see if you have any files separate from social media like twitter or instagrams so you aren’t judging your work based on arbitrary popularity or clickability; look at it without bias and be fair to yourself. Is there something you found that you liked or really don’t like at all anymore? Could you see how to improve on it if you’re sure you can do better? I’d suggest a character design or portrait that you like in a way but can instantly think up a few ideas on how to make it a lot better. All the progress you’ve made is going to shine through each new detail and correction; you’ll take good care to treat something so important well!

[im-still-watching-anime]

just gave my first actual bad review of an instructor in the end of course evals and i have never felt so alive

[lnk-and-lnspiration]

The Value of Beta Readers: How to Find Them and Incorporate Their Feedback

Beta readers play a vital role in the writing process, offering valuable feedback and insights that can significantly enhance the quality of your work. These trusted individuals provide a fresh perspective, catching errors, identifying areas of improvement, and helping you polish your manuscript before it reaches a wider audience. In this article, we will explore the value of beta readers,…

[majestichyuk]

Sweet spot

Pairing :- Masseur!Jaemin x fem!reader

Summary :- After much convincing, maybe not at your own will, you finally agreed to get that much-needed massage, Thank you Seungkwan. 

Genre :- Smut (because I’m nice like that), fluff if you squint (you'll definitely see it), coworker Seungkwan, strangers to potential lovers. 

Wc :-  3.7K 

WARNING :- Reader has a nipple piercing (cause she, YOU are freaky like that.), teasing, dirty talk, Buff Jaemin, yes that is a warning, Jaemin loves the booty (you shouldn’t be surprised) so ass is being ATE just a lil lick is all, Jaemin is a pussy fiend. Female receiving, oral, cum eating, sexual tension. (I think that’s all ), sry for mistakes if there is any.

NOTES :- This here lady sluts and gentle whores is my first half smut that was in the making. I spent an hour and a half working on it, so I’ll check this off as the 4th story I’ve successfully completed 🎉 kudos to me. I hope you enjoy it and if you do comment and if you don't and think I could improve something still comment or message me anonymously, cause critique can lead to my improvement but being bitchy will get you nowhere, ANYWAYS, LIKE, REBLOG & FOLLOW. 

-------------------------------------------------------

“Why don’t you just come with me to the spa on Saturday, huh y/n?” Your best friend/coworker, begged you as he grabbed your arm, tugging you lightly.

“Do I look like I have time to go to a spa?” You licked the tip of your finger as you skimmed through the documents that your lazy boss rudely dropped on your desk, without uttering as much as a please.

“And plus, Saturdays are clean-up days, my cousin is a lazy fuck and I have to suffer from it,” You itch the crown of your head, slightly groaning realizing you might have to do an all-nighter once again on a Friday evening with the load of work in front of you. 

“Why don’t I take some of these with me,” Seungkwan lightly squeezed your hands as he took up about 60% of your work from your desk. 

“That way you can have a good night's sleep, while I plan our day out tomorrow,” Seungkwan squealed as he imagined finally getting to pamper you but you had to rain on his parade.

“No” You took the papers from him and placed them in your folder.

“No?” He looked at you in disbelief.

“I didn’t stutter, I won’t burden my work on you, it’s fine,” You reassured him.

“But you didn’t put your work on me, I volunteered,” He snatched your folder and took out the papers he had before, getting up from his seat and placing them in his briefcase.

“And I don’t want to hear any more nonsense about you doing all the work at the house when your cousin is a grown MAN,” Seungkwan picked up his suit jacket and swiftly put it on.

“Ah Kwannie, It’s really not a big deal– okay…” You stopped uttering a word when he hit you with that stare, a stare only a child of a strict and overprotective mother would understand, it was bone-chilling really.

“Good, I’ll text you the details so make sure you fix yourself up nice and be punctual,” Seungkwan placed his polyester scarf around his neck and ray-ban his glasses on (yes he wears ray-bans shut up). 

“Go home, finish off the work, do whatever you do at night, that ritual of yours whatever, and sleep well, sleep early,” Seungkwan pulled you up from your seat and pulled you into a hug.

“You sure you don’t like girls, I’m just saying if you’d allow me to slap on a strap I’d make a heck of a guy,” Seungkwan pushed you off and picked up his phone, giving you a side glance.

“Girl if you don’t go home, goodbye.” He laughed richly as he walked out, leaving the office. You followed the same routine minutes later and headed home. 

—-----------------------------------------------------------

Seungkwan ended up sending you the website for the Spa he had been rambling about for weeks on end as soon as you stepped into the door of your house. You decided to check it out after completing your office work and getting ready for bed.

After an hour and a half, you flopped into your bed, finally getting to relax. You checked the time, normally you’d finish work around late 11 but now it was around 8:35p.m, thanks to Seungkwan that was your earliest, EVER. You did a light prayer for him because he’s an angel.

You covered yourself with your sheet and opened your and Seungkwan's messages where he sent the link, you exchanged words with him before you clicked the link. 

He told you he already made the reservation on your behalf and because he was close friends with a guy named Wonwoo there, he was able to get a discount. He told you your first appointment would be a massage done by some woman named Na Jaemin, it should be an easy name to remember because before you started working in your current job you were a daycare teacher and there was the cute little girl whose name was IM Jaemin, oh was she a menace.

The website just showed all the available procedures, the cost, and the exaggerated descriptions of the long-lasting after-effects of the excellent experience. You turned your phone off, turned it over, and went to sleep.

—-----------------------------------------------------------

Loud, obnoxious snores were coming from your room, your cousin slowly opened your door, peeping inside to check to see if you were okay, living, and not choking to death.

He walked up to your bed and pinched your lips shut. “You need to change your settings on that noise that you’re making,” He looked at you in disgust, shaking his head, and watched as you stopped breathing and shot up from your sleep in a sitting position, knocking him on his ass on the floor. 

“CHENLE WHAT THE FUCK?!” If looks could kill you’d have a red dot aimed at your forehead right now. Chenle got up and dusted himself off.

“You do know I could hear you snoring all the way across the hall?” He used his thumb and pointed outside your door, You rolled your eyes and checked your phone.

“Oh fuck!” You jumped out of bed, shoving Chenle out of the way, he landed on your bed and flopped on the floor as you grabbed your towel and rushed into the bathroom. 

“YOU’RE WELCOME YOU MIX-BREED ASSHOLE!” Chenle shouted as he stormed behind you.

“CLEAN MY HOUSE YOU OBNOXIOUS PIECE OF SHIT!,” You replied as you slammed the bathroom door, minutes later you heard his bedroom slam as well, and you rolled your eyes.

—-----------------------------------------------------------

“Don’t look at me like that,” You sulk as you look away from Seughkwan. So you woke up late and got there late and when you arrived you were met with a disappointed Boo Seughkwan, arms crossed, legs over one another as he sat outside of the Spa company in the few seats placed outside, looking at you blankly.

“I have every right to jump you in this very moment–..but I’m not going to because I have a reputation to obtain here,” He got up and walked inside, with you following behind.

“Just know I would never go down without a fight, there’s only one of us who actually took boxing classes,” You raised your brow at him as he flicked your forehead and told you to keep quiet as he spoke to the receptionist.

You purse your lips as you look around the establishment, It has a cozy feel. The decor is so homely with some pictures of the employees that work here placed up on the wall, warm colors decorated the place as it was spotless you could almost see yourself on the tiled floors. 

The receptionist lady asked you about your information and told you to wait in the available room on the second floor. 

“Enjoy your massage babe,” Seungkwan says as he quickly places your hair in a bun (If you imagined your hair up, unimagine it, 💀 boo put it up for you). 

“I heard he’s amazing at his job AND he was highly recommended when I filled out the server on your behalf,” You froze after registering his words.

“He’s?Him?He?” You side glanced at him. “Why didn’t you feel the need to mention a dude is gonna be feeling me up Mr. Boo?” You forced a smile that didn’t reach your eyes.

“Get me a masseuse Seungkwan,” 

“Y/N-”

“Get me a masseuse Seungkw-,” Seungkwan used his index and thumb to pinch your lips together. (Justice for y/n’s lips in the chat)

“I love you Y/N, I do, but last time I checked I paid for this shit, and you are going to enjoy every last minute of it, Okay?” Seungkwan asked.

“Fine,” You say with a smile that transforms into a dirty look. “This better be the most mind-blowing and toe-curling experience I’ve ever had.”

“And it would be the only and first experience you ever had,” Seungkwan mumbled as he walked to the elevator after signing some papers. 

“What’d you say,” You questioned.

“Nothing,” He laughed as he pinched your cheeks while calling you all sorts of baby names.

—-----------------------------------------------------------

You entered the designated room on the second floor, wiped your palm on your shirt, and nervously opened the door. You see a little walk-in closet on the right side of the room with a curtain placed to divide the areas.  You see there are a couple of hangers and a table with some towels placed beside it. You took off your shirt and placed it on one of the hangers, you quickly took off your bra and put on the towel provided. Thirdly it was your pants until you heard the door open. 

“Good evening, Miss L/N, I’ll be your masseur for this session,” You froze as you peeped through the curtains to put a face to that alluring voice and you almost wished you had convinced your best friend a little more about switching. 

“Um Hi, I’ll be out in a minute,” You quickly responded as you disappeared behind the curtains again. 

“You can leave on your underwear if that would make you more comfortable,” Jaemin assured you as he went to set up the room. He started lighting some candles to set a relaxing mood. The whole room was filled with the soft scent of lavender and a hint of sweet orange that was rich in limonene. 

You folded your pants and kept on your panty as suggested by the masseur. You walked out of the room and set your eyes upon the gorgeous man in question. He was muscular-looking, even in the scrubs he wore. He looked up at you from his place on the floor when he was searching for the oil that happened to be at the bottom back part of the drawer.

“Well you requested a full body massage and I’ll try my best to fulfill your desired needs,” Jaemin softly grinned at you and motioned for you to take a seat on the massage table, you’ll remember to put salt in Seungkwan’s coffee on Monday. 

“Thank you,” You found it hard to really say anything, his stare was quite intimidating even though his smile gave you butterflies that just made your heart swell.

He turned his back to you so you took the opportunity to discard your towel and lay on the table. You laid on your back and placed the towel on top of you. Jaemin turned around with his oil in hand, smiling down at you.

“Well all you have to do for me is relax,” Jaemin said, the tone of his voice, giving you goosebumps.

“Okay,” You replied softly as you relaxed your body and closed your eyes, taking the aroma of the atmosphere and bringing your body to ease. 

Jaemin adjusted your towel to your mid-thigh, the tip of his fingers lightly brushing your skin, he then moved upwards and brought the top of your towel to the midsection of your breast. 

He began his work on your shoulders. He delicately kneaded the area, softly caressing all the knots you have in your neck, gently tracing under your jaw with his thumbs. It felt divine, no man had ever touched you with such thoughtfulness and you’re hoping he’s not the last.

Jaemin moved his hands slowly down your arms, gingerly squeezing the tight muscles as he steadily brought them back up, repeating the process as you felt sleep creeping up on you, Jaemin came back up to your cleavage.

“Would you mind if I removed the top of the towel?” Jaemin asked as he was still above you, looking up at him and seeing him upside down was a little odd but he still for some odd reason looked good.

“Is it mandatory for the massage?” You asked and that made Jaemin smile at you.

“Well, of course, I only deliver the best, and I may even give you a special massage,” Jaemin smiled down at you again, but the smile was different, his eyes seemed to be telling a whole other story, his hands brush the top of your chest, you mutter a quiet okay and closed your eyes once again, letting the cozy environment take over. 

“Good, it’s okay, I’ll take good care of you,” He said in such a deep tone, way different from the customer service one he used when he first greeted you, you wondered if it was because he was just comfortable as it’s his natural forte. 

He reached over you and moved the towel under your breast, now at the navel of your stomach, he placed it quite low but you didn’t mind. Jaemin released a slightly strained exhale as he pursed his lips and poured some of the oil into his brawny hands. His eyes fell on your nipples, customized in a barbell designed with a crystal, rhinestone, clear zircon, and a beautiful set of pink gems. 

He firmly positioned his hands at the side of your breast, gently caressing the fat. He cupped it and massaged under the flesh as he slowly brought his hand up and faintly grazed your nipple. You let out a surprised gasp not expecting to be so sensitive. Jaemin looked down at you, examining your face, and noticed your mouth was slightly ajar due to the sound you let out earlier. From this angle he had the perfect chance to just shove his twitching dick down your throat, he bet it’s warm like the way your body is heating up right now but he brushed it off and continued his work on your chest.

He squeezed the flesh and watched as you hurried to bite your bottom lip, Jaemin thought it was time he went to another part of your body. He made his way to your lower body, he noticed you had on your underwear.

“Would it be okay if I asked you to remove the towel completely? since you have on your undergarments,” Jaemin asked you as he clasped his hands behind his back, staring you down deeply with a sweet smile. You nodded your head, and you gazed down at yourself, seeing your nipples stand up tall and proud, you genuinely felt way more relaxed than when you first came here. 

“Wonderful, I enjoy giving pleasure to others who look like they haven’t had a good rest day,” Jaemin discarded the towel away from your body and placed it on the table beside him.

You smiled, you couldn’t conceal it, he was a sweet talker. You begin to shut your eyes and Jaemin starts to rub on your feet, you let out a soft groan, you are on your feet the majority of the time at work so this feels like heaven. He inches up your leg and starts kneading different areas, after some time he asks if you could turn over.

Jaemin has always been a man with excellent self-control but he guesses there’s a first for everything. You turned over on your stomach and Jaemin took that as a sign to take a breather, he looked down at himself and noticed his problem. At this point, he doesn’t know how long he’ll be able to hold it. He gripped himself and let out a soft sigh as he looked down at you, he furrowed his brows as he approached the table once again, contemplating if he should start with the top or lower half first.

Jaemin made up his mind as he poured some oil on your smooth back, you had laid your head on your forearm. Jaemin tenderly massaged your back, working out all sorts of sounds from you, because he’s just that good with his hands. 

He finished off with your back and moved to your legs, caressing your soft thighs, eyes settling on the slight jiggle of your plump ass. He looked up at you and delicately spread your legs apart a little as he moved his way to your inner thighs. He observes the way your pussy lips struggle to stay concealed in your baby blue panties, Jaemin bites down on his tongue and took a deep exhale, swallowing down thick as he sees some wetness forming on your underwear, Jaemin continues his task as he boldly inches closer to your prized possession. 

You started to squirm, feeling slightly bothered, needy even. You innocently lifted your hips off the table, trying to get some friction and squeeze your thighs together but Jaemin kept them open. 

“I thought I told you to relax, If you behave I can easily give you what you want,” Somehow you can hear Jaemin like he was right by your ears and he was, he stood beside you, roughly rubbing the fat muscle of your ass, spreading your cheeks apart and watching them jiggle back in their place. 

“Will you look at that,” Jaemin whispers as he takes the bottle of oils and pours some of it over your ass. Jaemin went back to the foot of the table and climbed between your legs.

“What are you doing, Jaemin?” You softly questioned Jaemin as you felt the cushion on the massage table dip under you. 

“I’m just trying to get a better position so I can give you an amazing happy ending, love” That tone, he used again but this time it was more sultry and lust-filled, you could almost see the smirk on his face, you have a feeling you know where this is headed and you’re all on board with playing along, note to self buy Seungkwan dinner after you put salt in his coffee. 

“Okay, I hope this all was worth the hassle,” You replied knowing damn well it was.

Jaemin bit his lips as he kneaded your ass, he used his knees to spread your legs apart more. He laid on his stomach, inched closer, rubbed his nose on the line of your panty, bit the fat of your ass, and grazed his thumb over your asshole. He dipped his head and licked the outside of your underwear, softly biting your inner thigh.

Your moans began to increase the more he teased you, as if he could read minds he turned you over, wanting to see your face. 

“Would you like me to continue?” Jaemin lips started to rise on one side, giving you a teasing smile.

You blushed at his bluntness, “Eat me out Jaemin,”.

Jaemin leaned forward and pulled you by the back of your neck into a rough and sloppy kiss, honestly the best you’ve had. He gently sucked on your tongue and pulled at your hard nipple. 

“So fucking sexy,” Jaemin said as he gave you a once over before spreading your legs and giving them for you to hold, he run his hands on the back of your thigh as he examines every inch of you spread out in front of him. 

He hooked a finger under your panties and pulled them to the side. You let out a quiet moan as the cold air hit your wet pussy. He pushed your legs back even more so you hooked them behind your head.

“Look at this pretty pussy, so fucking wet,” Jaemin ran his finger around your lips and brought his finger to his mouth, humming about how sweet you tasted. He dipped his head and took a long swipe with his thick tongue.

“Oh fuck,” You let out a relief sign after finally getting some attention, you looked down at Jaemin sucking on your swollen clit that was painfully neglected in months. His head bobbed up and down as he took slow and sensual slurps, making your toes curl and breath hitch.

You started to rock your hip but Jaemin placed his heavy hands on your ass to hold you down, he dipped his head lower and poked his tongue on your asshole, fighting his way in. 

“Maybe I’ll have to prep you another time,” Jaemin smirks as makes his way to your gaping hole, sticking his long tongue, and forcing a strained moan out of you. He looked up at you, feeling himself grow even harder if that’s possible, absolutely falling in love with the way he has you a putty just from his tongue, the way you just look so sexy to him like this, pussy all red and angry, juices dripping from his chin, the way you bite your lips to conceal your sexy whimpers. 

He groped your breast and brought his attention back to your clit, switching between licking and sucking, completely abusing it. You reached your hand to his head to keep him in position.

“Oh don’t fuckin stop- oh my fucking– shit Jaemin..” You laid your head to the side, one eye clenching as your toe curled for dare life. Jaemin bore his face deeper into your soaking pussy, placing his tongue back inside as his nose rubbed your clit, sending you into cloud nine. He removed his face and quickly replaced it with his skilled hand, he placed his fingers on your clit and started swiping vigorously. 

You felt your stomach suck in as you started twitching, you felt like a bucket of water was thrown over you and you woke up from a dream you’d do anything to get back to. 

“Yes, look at that, wanna give me more,” Jaemin watched as you completely drenched his arm when you squirted, something you didn’t know you could do until today. He sucked up every last drop causing you overstimulation. 

You removed your legs and grabbed his face, bringing him into a passionate kiss. He placed his forehead on yours smiling embarrassingly.

“You definitely have to be my soulmate if you were able to make me come in my pants without touching me,” Jaemin said with a light chuckle. 

“I can do that, If you take me out on a date?, we can split the bill since I suggested,” You looked Jaemin deep into his eyes and he blushed slightly.

“I like that idea, but I’ll pay for the bill,” He kissed your lips before getting up from the table.

You both cleaned up and of course exchanged contacts, and it was history from there. 

Thank you Seungkwan.

[spiderforestcomics]

Make a webcomic? Want to join our lineup? SpiderForest is open for membership applications through June 30! Visit our Apply page when you're ready to send yours in, or read on for some highlights about what we offer, things to keep in mind, and how our application process works!

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If you're looking for a fast road to fame and fortune, sorry, that's not us!

If you're looking for a community of like-minded creators who care about the same things - especially the craft of comics; doing our best to be positive, supportive peers and human beings; and making cool/fun stuff together - that's what you'll find here.

It's not just about the comics! We aim to nurture a community with good vibes. So think about how you'd be a community member in your application!

In your application, remember to tell us what you yourself would bring, and how you envision participation with our members, not just the features of your comic. More tips in our FAQ!

🔥 2. This isn't a one-shot game.

Don't despair if you don't get in on the first try. We've got members who didn't get in till application 2, 3 or even more.

Everyone's journey is different. The ability to take and apply constructive critique and to demonstrate improvement over time is also something we've all experienced - and admire.

Make sure you're ready! Returning applicants MUST visit our Hub's Critique Section to ask for critique before February 1.

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Whether or not you get in, we're always here to provide actionable critique and feedback to help you improve. We have public spaces where we share and learn together!

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[tofupixel]

I'm not much of an artist but I've seen your work and I genuinely love the pixel art you make, I was wondering if you could give me some starting out tips, or even send me some of your earliest art as a reference to where you started out if you feel comfortable. Il attach a piece i did recently as a reference to where I am at currently and would really value your feedback!

Thank you!

i will show you some of my old stuff

at this time (pre 2020) i was really into watching mortmort tutorials and my art kind of reflects that, especially the lil guys sprites. i didn't really have any longterm goals or know what i really enjoyed doing so i was experimenting a lot.

what you could begin to do is break down the elements in the piece you sent me, like hunt out a tutorial for clouds, hair, faces etc. (here is a great collection by pedro). studying individual elements can help a lot in putting together a scene and i think you'll find that you improve very quickly

other than that, if you take a look at the '#pixel art tutorial' or '#tutorial' tags on my blog you will find quite a lot of info i have already put together

if you want direct critique i wouldn't mind helping, or you can join my server and post in the #feedback-and-wips channel where other ppl can help as well

hope that helps !! :--3

[daddypriceugh]

Age gap

*************************

So sorry for not updating earlier :(

This one isn't as good as I thought it would be but oh well.

Also if you have any ideas for future writings please dm me <3

Tw: little bit angst (fluff at the end)

***************************

You always knew that the age gap John and you had would make your relationship harder.

That's what everyone told you. They thought that he was too old for you -which he wasn't in your eyes- and that his job could get you into danger.

You never cared about these talks. Ignored them and John did too. At least you thought he did.

Today it turned out you were wrong. The argument had started earlier this morning. What it was about? You didn't remember but you did know that one of the two of you would say something that'll hurt the other.

This time it was John who did it.

"Can't you stop being so childish for one fuckin' day?!" He yelled into you face, some spit splashing on your cheek.

The room went quiet.

You stared into his eyes with a shocked expression, not expecting him to say that.

You saw the moment when he realised what he had said. His gaze softened and he reach out for your hand.

"Darlin'..."

You took a step back and whispered "Childish?" A slight laugh escaped your lips as your tone rose. "Childish! I'm being childish?! You were the one that started the whole argument!"

Anger swelled up inside you making your blood boil. John saw the change in your demeanour and pulled you into a hug swiftly, holding your body close to him.

"No love I didn't mean it like that."

"No you did. Don't fucking lie John!" You sighed. "Maybe the others were right about me being to young for you. Maybe this whole relationship was a mistake"

He tensed at your words and pulled you even closer to him. "Don't say that! No mistakes were made and never will. I love you (Y/N). And only you." He spoke softly while staring into your eyes. "You're perfect to me and I don't care if you're younger or not. You're my everything."

Tears started to slide down your face at the words. Nodding softly, you pulled his face down and kissed him.

The kiss was full of passion and love even tho it only lasted some seconds.

"I'm sorry..."

He sighed lovingly "no need to apologise my love. I'm the one that nearly fucked up." He smiled slightly at.

You looked at the kitchen watch, seeing that it was already 11pm. "Shall we go to bed?" He nodded in reply.

10 minutes later you two were laying in bed, your head on his bare chest while your hand drew circles on it.

"I love you John, please don't forget that"

"I love you too darling. And I would never."

You stayed in that position until both of you fell asleep while being curled up into each others presence.

***********************

Critique and tips for improvements are always welcome.

(English isn't my first language so please excuse grammar mistakes <3)

Have a nice day!!

************************

[guppydoll]

This Isn't Barbie Land: Chapter 1

Ken x Fem!Reader

You are working away as a waitress at a night club when the oddest man came up to you after your shift and accidentally swept you off your feet. Yet you don't know if you are ready for another relationship after the disaster that was your last one. You just hope everything goes nice and easy.

Ken is your doll and he wants you to teach him how to be human and help you through the pain you've been feeling.

This first chapter felt rushed to me a little but it's all the world building setting up the plot of the story and what's to come. Enjoy this little dabble and I promise I have a ton planned. It's also my first time writing in second person. Forgive me if there are some grammar errors and feel free to leave any critique on this story! I wanna always improve and I love feedback!

I also did a quick once through for editing cause buh, I hate editing and I just wanted to post it. Also I wanna say I got inspired from the heart beat part of this story from Nothing Natural by @interpolanticssuperfan . Their fanfic is super amazing please also check them out

This story is 18+ but I'll add in the warnings if there is any smut in the chapter.

Warnings: None for this one aside from mild swearing, alcohol consumption, and jokes about sex/mentions of sex. (Ken is virgin so get ready for Reader having to teach Ken about sex soon enough)

Words: 1893

You knew it was always a bad idea to stay for a drink after your shift ended, but after the night you had it had become a necessity. Another rough night of running around on your feet in heels that could qualify as an OSHA violation. You pulled your skirt down, trying to give yourself some modesty. Not that you disliked mini skirts, you loved them! You just hated the feeling of eyes burning into your skin and longing looks drunk men would give you as you brought them their drinks. At least the tips made it worth it.

You downed your cocktail quickly, scanning the crowd of partying people. You noticed a very tall blonde with women huddling around him until you would see their faces scrunch up after he spoke and they would walk away, only for another woman to try her shot at the blonde. He had a complete look of innocence and just the biggest smile, not seeming to understand when a girl would run her hand up his chest. It made you giggle, he was nothing like any of the regulars.

He was stunning, even though it was hard to see him in the dull light of the club. His big blue eyes danced all around the place. He would smile like a child as a waiter would walk past holding a tray filled with sparkling drinks. When he suddenly made eye contact with you, you felt a rush of chills. He was similar to a doll, staring back at you with a big bright smile and glossy eyes. You shifted nervously as he raised his hand to you and waved as if you were an old friend. Your hand twitched, wanting to wave back at him. He had to be waving to someone else as you glanced back to the bar you were sitting at and raised your hand for another drink.

“Seems blondie likes you.” The bartender brought your refill, just a plain vodka cranberry. Simple but it tasted good and you enjoyed the little buzz.

“I’ve never seen someone like him before.” You turned to your coworker. She was the other reason you stayed after. Claire was fiery and always soothed your nerves. She had been there for you when no one else was. “He’s got quite the crowd around him.”

“He’s had the crowd since he’s walked in here but no girl has seemed to have won him over.” Claire laughed, stealing a sip from your drink.

“Hey, people are allowed to be picky.” You swatted at your friend, taking back your glass. The chills hadn’t left. It was the feeling described as seeing your soulmate for the first time. The air knocked out of your lungs, goosebumps running over your skin but deep warmth flooded your entire body. It had to be the vodka.

Claire grinned like a cat and winked, pointing behind you. You gave a swift glance behind you, bringing the glass to your lips not expecting your view of the entire bar to be blocked by the chest of the blonde you had been staring at before. Fuck. He was hot from a distance but up close he was godly.

“Hi! I really love your dress! You look beautiful!” The blonde smiled brightly as compliments kept tumbling from his perfect mouth. “I’m Ken!”

“Hi…” You stared blankly at him, the blonde- um- Ken, who waited attentively for your name. “I’m y/n, and thank you. This is just my uniform, I work here.”

It was a tight pvc mini dress, uncomfortable to wear but it matched the theme of the night club. Every waiter and waitress was meant to be eye candy for the guests. 

“It’s something Barbie would wear!”

You cringed a little at his comment, he was right. This was like a cheap doll outfit, leaving little to the imagination.

“I love it y/n!” Ken beamed so brightly you thought you would go blind.

“What?”

“I love it!” The man took your free hand in his. “You’re the prettiest girl here! I don’t understand it, you just took my breath away. All of the Kens would be so jealous if I brought you back to Barbie Land but I made a bet with Ken that I wouldn’t come back to Barbie Land cause I could make it in the real world just has Barbie had.”

He was either insane or the drunkest person here, but he was stupid hot. You just nodded your head slightly, sipping more from your drink. Ken was still holding your hand and pulled you up quickly, your drink spilling over both of you. You could barely react as he pulled you through the crowd.

You shot a panicked look at Claire, only for her to give a toothy smile and a big thumbs up. She was gonna pay for this, she had been trying for you to get back into the dating scene ever since… he had left the city. You placed your cup on a tray of a passing waiter and you tugged Ken to a stop.

“Where are we going Ken?” Taking his other hand in yours, his hands were massive… the alcohol had definitely gotten to you. Images of his hand wrapped around your throat or holding your hips to his, danced in your brain.

“The beach, y/n! I’m way better on the beach! You’ll love me on the beach!”

Better on the beach? What did that even mean? If this had been any other man you would have started screaming bloody murder but something about Ken was enduring. You know it was stupid to trust some random stranger but you knew he didn’t have the ability to cause harm to even a fly. 

“What? For beach sex? I’d recommend taking me to dinner first.” You knew your inhibitions were lowered but that had slipped from your mouth without you even thinking.

“Sex?” Ken paused and looked down at you, still smiling dumbly. “What’s sex?”

“You don’t know what sex is?”

“Well, of course I know what it is.” Ken’s whole demeanor changed instantly and puffed out his chest. “Just seeing if you know what sex is.”

“Yes, I know what sex is.” You answered as he looked you up and down.

“Well good then yes that is what we are gonna do. Sex on the beach. I’m good at everything Beach.”

It was obvious he had no idea what he was talking about. You started to giggle. Who on earth was this man?

“Hey!” Ken had panic written all over his face, “Please don’t laugh at me! Y/n!”

His whining was adorable and you led him out of the club, feeling the humid air of the outside hit your skin. This was a first but you were the experienced one here even though he appeared far older than you. You didn’t get it but this odd man was pulling you in.

“It’s okay if you don’t know what sex is. I was kidding anyway.” You smirked. “Let's just go to the beach Ken.”

His blinding smile returned and began pulling you to the sandy shore. 

“That’s a relief! I have zero clue what that is. We don’t have that in Barbie Land.”

It was hard to walk in the soft sand in heels so you kicked them off and left them behind. You’d find them later, right now the very handsome and even stranger man in front of you was more important. 

Ken had started talking again, something about Barbies and plastic waves. It was absolute nonsense spilling from the blonde. You finally understood why all of the women that had approached him turned away absolutely appalled.

You plopped yourself on the warm sand, entranced by Ken’s bizarre story. He was waving his arms around, explaining about how once he tried to impress Barbie by surfing the waves but got thrown into the air. He didn’t break anything because he is super cool and super strong. Then he started about how after Barbie left Barbie Land some of the Kens started putting him down for being “Barbie-less”.

“But I’m Ken!” Ken huffed and placed his hands on his hips. “I’m enough! They just don’t understand it! Some do but Ken always has to one up me!”

“You are all named Ken?”

He paused and focused down on you, scrunching his brows. 

“Yes. It’s what Mattel named us.”

“Mattel?” You sober upped after hearing that. “The toy company?”

“Yeah! I’m a Ken! Or I was, now I’m Ken. Just Ken. Not a Ken.” The blonde gave you a million dollar smile. “I’m my own man, tiny baby.”

You just sat there, gaping at the weird man. He was telling you he was the boy doll that came along with the popular Barbie doll. You only had one Ken as a kid but you had at least 10 Barbies. The craziest part? You believed everything he was saying.

“You’re a doll.”

Ken flopped down right in front of you, nodding his head vigorously. He took your hand again and compared its size to his.

“Not just a doll.” Ken was entranced by how petite your hand was compared to his. “When I saw you, I had this feeling. I’ve never had this feeling before, but I know you Y/N. I think I'm your doll.”

“My doll?”

“Yes!” Ken laced his fingers with yours. “Weird Barbie told us that every Barbie and Ken have someone that's playing with them. Even Allan and Midge have someone playing with them.”

“I haven’t played with a doll in years. How does that even work?”

“I’m not sure how it works either. All I know is you’re my girl.”

You were thankful it was dark outside so Ken couldn’t see how flushed your face had gotten. This had to be a dream. You stared at your hand being held by Ken’s, you felt oddly complete.

“Can you help me, Y/N?” Ken’s voice was soft, timid almost. “I wanted to find you, the one who had been playing with me. It wasn’t because Ken dared me. I’ve been feeling lonely, unlovable. I thought it would be fixed after I realized I wasn’t just a Ken but it didn’t go away. I went to Weird Barbie and she told me it was the feelings of the girl who had played with me. You are feeling like this and I don't get it!”

Ken forced your hand to his chest, his skin was warm. You expected to feel a heartbeat but his chest was entirely still aside from the rise and fall of his chest from breathing. The lack of a thump in his rips killed the rest of your doubts.

“I want to become like you. I want to be human. Then I can help you.”

“You feel what I feel?”

“Not everything, just the feelings deep down.” He squeezed your hand like a vice. “Please, Y/N. There is so much I wanna learn about. Then I can help you not feel lonely and unlovable!”

“Okay, Ken. I’ll try to teach you.” You smiled gently and it startled you when you felt a beat in his chest. Ken was also alarmed by the new sensation he was feeling.

“You have a heartbeat Ken.”

“I have a heartbeat... you gave me a heartbeat.”

Next Chapter

Tag List! Lemme know if you wanna be added in the comments!

@stanfanfiction

[frostbite-merun]

Aquarium tips!

So if you're new to aquascaping, here's a very simple thing you can do to make your scape look better.

The S l o p e

Angling your substrate towards the back, be it steep or shallow, gives the whole thing depth, and it means that you'll see more of your scape from the front. Obviously don't do this if you want it to look good from all angles, but if it's meant to be seen from one angle, that's a non-issue.

Below the cut are some entries to AGA's 2022 aquascaping competition that demonstrate the S l o p e better than I can.

This is a very dramatic S l o p e for a more dramatic scape. Showing off all of those lovely rocks.

Here's a more subtle S l o p e. It gives the illusion that the path in the middle extends further back than it actually does.

Another path illusion here!

Here's one of the 1st place winners. You can learn a lot about aquascaping just looking at this bad boy, but as far as the S l o p e is concerned, it gives the illusion of extra depth, and it raises bits of hardscape higher up so that you can see them from a level, front angle.

In fact, just go look at AGAs aquascaping contest backlog if you want to improve. A lot of them also have judge's critiques which are very useful.

Also also! Keep in mind that these scapes have their picture taken when they look their best! For the rest of the year they ABSOLUTELY look more wild and frazzled. Plus hundreds of dollars go into them because the cash prizes for these kinds of contest are very, very high. So it's 100% okay if you aren't able to make a big, sexy tank that wins contests and looks good 24/7 365 days a year.

As long as you end up with something that you love, or learn a lot of new things making something that you hate, you're on the right path!

[family-on-6]

hello tumblr artists!! my little sister (12) loves to make art and was looking for some tips on how to improve, she's not allowed to have social media so I told her I'd ask you guys! honest critiques only please :)

she said it's the character twisting roads from the iterator logs!

[dwellordream]

about to sound like a turbo asshole but that’s okay. tens of thousands of aspiring writers on tumblr who freely admit they only read fanfic, fanfic adapted into original books, and webcomics/cartoons.

there is nothing wrong with engaging in fandom and reading tons of fanfic. I don’t actually have a moral or artistic issue with writers turning their fanfics into original works and trying to publish it. tale as old as time.

but the #1 thing that will improve your writing, more than any list of tumblr tips or youtube writing seminars or discord discussions, is reading a wide range of books.

read ‘popcorn lit’. read coming of age tales. read kids fantasy. read adult fantasy. read murder mysteries. read erotica. read nonfiction memoirs. read books of poetry. read historical fiction. read books by dead people and young people and translated works. read realistic dramas. read sci fi. read horror. read short story anthologies.

but you MUST read more than just fanfiction if you want to improve. and if you are an adult you SHOULD try to branch out and read beyond YA literature. even if’s uncomfortable and hard at first. hell, read books to disagree with them! read authors you object to! articulate why you disagree! critique! that’s part of maturing as a reader and writer.

[sxnniiwrites]

So, you want to write fanfics.

Here are my top fanfic writing tips!

You don't have to waste time on physical descriptions of characters, since your target audience already knows them, UNLESS: - their appearance is different in your fic in some way (timeskip, different verse, etc) - OR it's genuinely significant, like character A being struck by character B's beauty at first sight and having to swoon over their gorgeous features. Other than this, if it's not plot significant nor important to the readers' perception of the story, then don't worry about it if you aren't confident with physical descriptions!

Pay attention to character voice. What's that, you ask? Well, everyone's inner thoughts sound different, right? It matches your own personality and speech patterns. This is the same with characters. This is much easier if the franchise you're writing for is a book series, of course; you already have somewhere to go to reference the style this character's thoughts are written in. With shows and movies, it's a bit harder to find each character's voice, but important nonetheless. If you don't have distinct voices for each character's POV, the writing and characterization can fall flat. A good way to find character voice is to write a few diary entries for each character (even if your story isn't going to be in first person POV, do it for this exercise). This will help establish individual voices, and then your characters will really start feeling like their canon selves.

Cater to your audience. This is the nature of fanfic. But seriously, don't be afraid of cliches! If your fandom loves hurt/comfort for a certain pairing, write that in! If your fandom is obsessed with tooth rotting wholesome fluff for a pairing, try that too! You don't have to, of course, but this can help keep your target audience interested and attract more readers through tags.

USE BETA READERS. Oh my gosh I used to not use betas and would just "edit" my fics all on my own, which of course meant scanning it briefly for bad typos because my brain was so fried from writing it that I didn't want to thoroughly read the whole thing and look for in-depth edits. I know it's scary to have someone else pick through your work but trust me, they LOVE what you wrote, regardless of how many edit suggestions they leave. They'll also help you see things from a reader's perspective that you may not have caught before. Remember, critique is just opportunity for improvement.

Please don't stop because you're embarrassed. Trust me, I've been there. For a while I didn't write fic because I felt "cringey" and was scared of my irls finding my fandom works. But honestly? Screw that. Write for yourself. Write because you love it. Cringe culture is dead, so write the stories you want to tell, and to hell with anyone who thinks it's weird. Besides, there are probably more fandom "weirdos" around you than you think.

Don't be afraid of creation. Happy writing!

[hazbinfallinginaspiral]

Sneak peek to some Vox Mermay content. Yes I’m late. Look, I drew this at the start of the month, worked on a bunch of stuff so it got pushed to the side, and now I’m back to it. I think that’s a win.

Anyway, suggestions on what kind of tails he should have would be nice! I was thinking of doing a bunch of different shark tails, and then maybe an Eel? But anything is fine, I just wanna draw fish boi. Also he’s gonna have top surgery scars because trans Vox is amazing and relatable to me specifically and I love him.

And general critique is also welcome- that actually goes for everything on all my blogs! Critique is always welcome. I appreciate tips and pointers on how to improve my work.

[majestichyuk]

Kutabare (くたばれ)

Pairing :- Jeno lee x Fem!reader

Summary :- Just jeno in his simp era.

Genre :- college student!Jeno, college student!reader, kinda cute, flirting, never back down never what- 

Wc :- 876 words babe

WARNING :- cringy overload but that's just me 💀lmao. Nut groping because why not lol, A lil lick moment but nothing drastic CALM DOWN. 

NOTES :- No smut (unless you ask ofc 😀). This is my second story cause I couldn’t help myself honestly. Had to refrain from going overboard because ion got much of a big following and need to know what my ppl want, so I can deliver what they need ✊. I’m open to critique because I can improve by it and praise is always appreciated. LIKE, FOLLOW & REBLOG. 

⌛ ⌛⌛

“Why are you following me Lee?” you asked for the 20th time today but he still continued to be on your ass ever since you transferred to this school 2 weeks ago because of personal reasons.  

“Because I simply can?” stating like it’s so obvious and as if you’re supposed to magically be aware of his odd innuendos. Ignoring him you continued to search for your next class.

Jeno of course had the same class as you and started playing with the little charms you have attached to your bag. You tried to fan his hand away but he quickly moved to your right and roughly pulled you to his side, his left arm resting on your shoulder.

“You need to lighten up more, putting up this persona isn’t gonna make me any less attracted to you,” He tightened his grip on you, whispered into your ears, and sultrily licked the side of your neck.

“It makes me want you even mor-” Before he could utter the next word you quickly pushed him off.

“EW WHAT THE FUCK JENO?!” you wiped the side of your neck, looking at him in disgust. You fixed your bag strap and pasted away to your class but Jeno swiftly leaped forward and grabbed your arm.

“Oh come on, don’t act like you didn’t like it,” He placed his other hand on your next arm and positioned you in front of him. 

You suddenly felt a ting in your lower stomach. You’ve always had a thing for Jeno but never wanted to act out those intrusive, unruly thoughts. You’d have to repeatedly remind yourself why you transferred in the first place, 1. To get a better education at a school with more open opportunities, 2. Start over and actually focus on the work and not make the same mistake you did at your previous school because failing is a feeling you’ve become to not like and you weren’t about the let Lee fucking Jeno distract you and get in the way of that. You’ve studied too hard to get accepted here, and he’s not going to make this whole progress a fluke. 

Jeno began to walk backward, leading you to a nearby janitors closet. “I just want to get to know you better, y/n,” He sang your name as he placed his hand on the back of your waist while stopping in front the door of the closet.

You roll your eyes and pull him by the ears. “I’ll allow you to get the know me better when I’m ready Lee Jeno,”.

He smiles seductively at you as he hunches over the more you pull on his ear groaning lightly. 

“Eh!?,” he let out a cute noise, tilting his head and looking at you as if you killed his dog the more he processed your words.

“But I know you enough,” he cupped your cheek whilst he removed your hand from his ear, leaving you stunned. He leans in closer to you, tightly wrapping his arms snugly around your waist. You could feel his minty breath brushing the tip of your nose, his bulging bicep digging into your skin in the skin-tight shirt he decided to wear, and his stone-hard chest pressed firmly against yours, feeling his rapid heartbeat, it almost made you blush. He smirked as he inched closer, but somehow, you felt something and got a little bold, so you held his gaze intensely. 

“You excited little boy?” you cheekily smiled as you groped him through his jeans. Jeno let out a strained moan as he looked you in the eye pleadingly. 

“Well you excite me by just being here. Simply can’t seem to help myself,” Jeno turned the knob of the closet door and pulled you inside.

The fourth-period bell began to ring indicating that class had finished and the next lesson was to begin. You halted your steps and backed out of the closet, leaving Jeno stunned.

“You’re gonna leave me here, bricked up in broad daylight?” Jeno braced on the door frame with his arms crossed over his chest cocking his brow at you, waiting on your reply. 

“Well, yeah” you chuckled lightly at seeing his discomfort. 

“I’ve got to get to my classes, and I’ve already missed one,” You brushed down your shirt. “AND you’re not gonna make me miss the rest,” you held onto your bag straps as you slowly took small steps backward.

“It’s not like we don’t have some classes together,” Jeno retorted.

“Keyword some and now you know why I sit away from you,” You place your arm in front of you when you realize Jeno walking closer to you, stopping him in his tracks.

“Take this as your first lesson in getting to know me better, I like the color blue,” you passed him and quickly left to get to your scheduled class. Jeno called out your name, and you turned your head in his direction.

“I can buy you a blue teddy bear, you know?!, THIS BIG” Jeno shouted, opening his long arms to dramatically show you the size of the imaginary bear, gaining some odd looks from the other students in the hallways. 

“Bye Jeno.” You playfully rolled your eyes and couldn’t help but smile and his cute gesture and went into your classroom. 

[lottesreads]

Why Me? - Part 6

Pairing: Bob Floyd x Mitchell! Female Reader (Callsign Mantis)

Warnings: Mentions of past abuse, bruises, (someone gets punched), details of panic attacks, swearing, one "daddy" joke, pining, big Rooster warning here, mommy issues, mentions of death, insecurities

Word Count: 5860

Summary: Going over flight maneuvers for the day doesn't go as everyone planned. Somethings from your past get revealed, and you grow a little closer to Bob.

A/N: PLEASE READ THE WARNINGS, this one is a little heavier and angstier, so I apologize for that. Things will get better though! Also, sorry for taking so long, I started a new job and had to take two tests so yay for me.

Masterlist

After what you are now calling the most awkward lunch ever, the day goes by… fine. The squad spends the remaining hours listening to feedback from your father, which surprisingly doesn’t ruffle anyone’s feathers too much. You pin it on the fact that it’s a Friday and everyone just wants to get out as soon as they can. You, of course, want to get out of there as well to spend time with Bob, and finally meet Sylvia. From all the pictures you’ve seen and how Bob describes her, she seems like the perfect dog.

But you’re also thinking about what Phoenix propositioned Bob with as well. It had sent you spiraling. All you can think about as Mav drones on about Payback and Fanboy’s practically perfect barrel roll, is how Bob is being set up with this woman. A woman, might you add, that he has never met or heard of before this day. You can’t help but stare straight in front of you, right at the back of Bob’s head. You’re able to see the tiniest bit of his profile, the wire frames peaking out atop his cheek. You’d like to believe you aren’t jealous. But history proves this wrong time and time again. This woman is just another thing you can add to the ever-growing list.

Bob turns his head ever so slightly, catching a glimpse of you staring out of his peripheral vision. You immediately look down at your papers, attempting to act as if you’re in deep thought about what Payback and Fanboy could have done better. Your eyes stay still on the paper as your brain moves a million miles a minute. God, Bob. Why did he have to be such an amazing person? You would have been able to move on if you had gotten to know him and realized he had a crappy personality, but unfortunately that is not the case. Now you’re stuck feeling jealous over some random woman who has no idea the implications of her attending Phoenix’s party next weekend. You chance a glance back up to Bob’s face and find that he’s already turned back to look at you.

“Mantis”, he whispers as he motions his head to the front of the room, right where your dad is staring you down.

“Sir”, you say, straightening up in your own seat. He raises his brow in a warning, as you shift your attention to the screen, seeing now that your own flights are up for critique.

“Thank you. Now that I have your attention, I have to say I am seeing noticeable room for improvement.” He turns back from the screen, pointing to where you took too sharp of a turn, or where you needed to slow down. You write down everything he says, even as the tips of your ears begin to burn in embarrassment. He is your captain, you know this. Everyone else knows this, but they also know what it feels like to get scolded by a dad. And you can’t help but see the similarities at this moment. He finally finishes after what feels like an eternity as he looks back at you, “Any questions?”

“No sir”, you respond bluntly. He was being nitpicky, for once in his life, and you weren’t sure what caused it at this moment. But you’re still a little confused at what you thought was a perfect run.

“Alright Rooster, you’re up.” You glance over to Rooster’s hard stare as he brings his gaze to the front of the room. You cannot wait to see your dad rip him a new one. It’s what he deserves, and honestly you could fly circles around this guy. “I have to say, I am thoroughly impressed with your work today.” Wait, what? Rooster’s face softens into a slight grin as your brow furrows in his direction. Folding your arms across your chest you sink back into your chair, watching as your dad gives Rooster a glowing review. An undeserved one in your opinion. And then Mav decides to tell you one of the worst ideas he’s ever had.

“Single-seaters, I’m gonna put you in groups and you’re going to go over the notes I gave you to hopefully help you execute these maneuvers better. Two-seaters, you’re going to do the same, but with your pilots and your WSO’s.” At this point, you’re just hoping you’re with Coyote or Fritz, hell, even Hangman. Mav looks down at his podium, going over the list before announcing them, “Fritz and Coyote, you’re a pair. And then we’ll have Rooster, Hangman, and Mantis as a group.”

“Jesus Christ”, you mumble under your breath. Was he trying to kill you? As the rest of the pairs move around to find places to talk, you very lazily turn your head in Rooster’s direction as he does the same to you. Hangman is standing in the aisle, looking back and forth at the both of you, very confused as to the standoff happening before him. You really don’t want to get up and walk over to Rooster. It may seem stupid, and childish, but you are not going to let him think you’re just going to waltz back over to him. Hangman breathes out a laugh, shaking his head at the two of you, ultimately taking the seat next to you. It makes you smile inside watching Rooster roll his eyes as he pulls up a spare chair.

“If any of you need me, I will be in a meeting with Cyclone and Warlock, so please direct any concerns to Hondo”, Mav announces as he points to Hondo giving a small wave in the back of the room.

“Well”, Hangman starts, “Since daddy-dearest gave Rooster a perfect score, I guess that just leaves you and me, Mantis.”

“No surprise there”, you mutter as you start looking through your notes. Rooster scoffs from the other side of Hangman, prompting you to look up at him. “What?”

“Nothing, just didn’t realize you’d be so bitter about someone on your team doing well. But then again I shouldn’t be surprised.” Adding a smile onto the end of his sentence he goes back to sorting through his notes.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I just think that when you have to rely on each other, you should be happy when someone does well. Especially when it’s our lives at stake here.”

“Well, I think giving someone confidence in their lack-luster abilities is dangerous, to everyone.” You say, folding your arms.

“And I completely agree”, Rooster nods, “that’s why Mav was honest with you. If he inflated that false confidence anymore than it already is, your head might have exploded.” Hangman raises his brows at the exchange before him. Why your dad thought it was a good idea to pair the three of you together, he’ll never know.

“Do you guys wanna get back to-”

“Oh, I have false confidence?”

“Or not”, Hangman finishes his sentence after being interrupted. Interrupted, not heard. It doesn’t really matter at this point while he tries to fade into his seat, waiting for this argument to be over and done with.

“He’s literally just blowing smoke up your ass, so you’ll ‘believe in yourself’”, you add in air-quotes,  “or whatever bullshit he made up. Or maybe he just wants to get on your good side to make up for lost time.” You’re vaguely aware of your own voice raising as everyone else’s conversations start dwindling and they turn to your group.

“Are you still on that? I thought we were past it already.” He responds, visibly agitated by your persistence.

“No, Rooster, you two got past that. I haven’t heard a goddamn word from you on the matter, or an apology. So no, I’m not past that.”

“Oh do you really wanna start this here?” Rooster asks, daring you.

“Oh I really do.” You respond just as sure. “So whenever you’re ready to apologize you know where to find me.”

“Everything alright over here?” Hondo has since made his way over to your group as he stands to your right. You obviously hadn’t noticed being too caught up in whatever this is.

“You think you deserve an apology?” Rooster’s voice raises, caught off guard.

“Yes! Why wouldn’t I? You just left, and even though I was twelve I still tried to get in contact with you for six years after the fact.”

“And you think I should be sorry for that? For the fact that I didn’t answer the phone when you tried to rub it in my face that he just let you go to the Academy?”

“You think after you he just let me go?!”

“Of course I do! That’s the only reason you’re sitting in this room with the rest of us!” Rooster stands right as you do, now physically looking down on you between the barrier that Hangman creates. He’s pushing on Rooster’s chest, while a hand comes to rest on your shoulder.

“Is that what you’re angry about? You’re jealous of me?” You ask incredulously, still not lowering your volume.

“Why the FUCK would I be jealous of you?”

“Rooster” Phoenix warns him. He continues anyway.

 “Jealous of the fact that your Navy connections bought you into the TopGun program in the first place, into the Academy? Huh?!” You almost flinch as he gets closer to your face, but you hold steady, chest heaving in anger still, but not backing down. “Or is it the fact that you think I’m jealous of your family, cause that sure as hell isn’t-”

“That is ENOUGH.” Hondo announces. “You are supposed to be professionals, how many of these meetings are going to end in fights?!” Your stony gaze falls from Rooster to the hand on your shoulder. You recognize the long fingers as Bob’s, he squeezes your shoulder lightly as if asking if you’re ok. You’re not, but the fact that he’s here and has your back has you taking a deep breath in, deeper than any you’ve been able to take since Rooster opened his big mouth.

“Ya know”, Hangman starts, “back in the olden Navy days they would have handed you boxing gloves and let you fight it out from there.” His attempt to relieve the tension falls flat as the rest of the team gauges if the two of you are actually done fighting.

“Yeah well”, Rooster responds, “From what I remember Mantis does a better job taking a punch than throwing one. Just ask her mom.” And just like that your breaths grow shallow again as your stomach drops. An audible breath leaves your mouth as everyone’s eyes fall from Rooster to you, and as much as you try to remain stoic, your bottom lip begins to wobble as your mouth falls open slightly. There’s an immediate sense of remorse in Rooster’s eyes as he realizes what he just said. But much like everything else he’s done, it’s too late. The damage has already been done.

“ROOSTER”, Phoenix scolds him. You don’t even stay to hear the rest of it, turning on your heel you leave the room, not being able to stand the looks of pity from your teammates. Once in the hallway you make your way to the women’s locker room. Each footstep seems louder than the next. The closer you get, the heavier the tears start to form on your lash line, only falling once you slam the door open and swing the curtain closed in a shower stall. Sliding down the wall of the cubicle, you hug your knees to your chest, attempting to silence the cries that are only coming naturally with the tears. It’s getting harder to breathe, even as you attempt to take large breaths. 

“What the fuck is wrong with you?!” Phoenix yells as she pushes Rooster. No one dares to stop her as she continues to berate him. Bob is absolutely stunned at the information Rooster just dropped, but is shaken out of his thoughts as he looks at the door you just fled through. By the way you rushed out of here, he thinks you’d like to be alone, but on the off chance you need someone, he slips out of the room to go find you. He passes the men’s locker room and heads to the women’s hoping that’s where you escaped. Knocking on the door, he slowly opens it.

“Hello? Is anybody in here?” He doesn’t receive an answer, but he can hear someone crying who he can only assume is you. “Mantis, are you ok?” Still no answer. “Mantis, I’m coming in” With his eyes glued to the floor he follows the sounds of your sniffling and sobs until he reaches you. “Hey, I’m opening the curtain, ok?” He slowly slides back the curtain to find you in the corner of the stall, face tucked between your knees as you attempt to take in ragged breaths. He’s immediately on his knees in front of you and his heart breaks at the sight. He thinks you know he’s there, but he can’t be sure. It’s obvious you’re in the middle of a panic attack and he doesn’t want to scare you, so he gently rests a hand on your knee.

“Mantis, can you hear me?” You raise your head at his voice, revealing a very red and splotchy face as tears continue to fall out of your eyes. Your breathing is still very ragged as you grip his hand on your knee as if he would float away if you let go. He would never dream of doing such a thing, but he grips your hand right back.

“It’s ok, I just need you to breathe for me, alright?” You nod your head at his words as he demonstrates taking deep breaths in, holding, then letting them out. You’re attempting to follow them as your head continues to swim, taking note of this he moves your hand from your knee to over his heart, pressing it against his chest. “I’m right here”, he tells you as you continue to follow his breathing. The soothing nature of his heartbeat helps to bring you back down to earth. And little by little you start to feel the rest of your body come to its senses. It starts with your fingertips, feeling the pressure of Bob’s rough hand pressing it against his steadily beating chest, as the feeling crawls up your arms and legs. The tears begin to subside and all that’s left is the dried tracks they left as they swam down your cheeks.

Bob remains in front of you the entire time, even as you realize just how close the two of you are, he doesn’t falter. You’re now acutely aware that your hand is still sandwiched between his hand and chest, your fingers instinctively wiggle against his as you finger the material of his flight suit.

“Are you gonna be alright if I leave you here for a sec?” You nod, not daring to make eye contact. “Ok, I’ll be right back.” He places your hand back against your knee as you stare at the spot he once occupied, your head beginning to ache. There are still so many emotions going on, but your body is starting to feel the after effects.

Bob’s quite literally back in under a minute as he assumes his previous position, only now holding a bottle of water. He opens it for you as you graciously accept it, taking a couple small sips to start out with. You manage a small “Thank you” as you hand the bottle back to Bob. Embarrassment begins to overtake your system as you curl back in on yourself.

“Are you feeling any better?” You nod your head slightly, still avoiding his gaze.

“Yeah, thank you.”

“Any time”, and though other people would pass it off as a way of Bob trying to say you’re welcome, you know he genuinely would help you any time you needed him. You’re still not sure what to say, so you don’t say anything. Bob moves to sit next to you against the wall, not breaking the silence.

“You don’t have to stay here with me”, you manage to croak out.

“I know.” He says so sure. “I just need to make sure you’re gonna be ok.” You let a deep sigh out through your mouth as you lean your head back against the tile wall. At this moment you’re just feeling drained. That’s what panic attacks usually do. You were just so mad at him, and then he shared one of your deepest, darkest secrets in front of all of your coworkers. You had maybe thought you’d be able to patch up your relationship with him if he owned up to his mistakes, but now? You don’t think you’ll ever be able to get past this. If your dad wants to spend so much time with Rooster, let him. You don’t want to see his face ever again, which you know is a big ask, knowing that you have to work together. Maybe you should just put in a transfer, it’s not like you see your dad a lot outside of work anyway. You’d miss most of these people more than they’d miss you.

Your thoughts are interrupted by Bob gingerly grabbing your wrist and facing your palm upwards, and reaching into his pocket he retrieves something, laying it down in your hand. He lets it go and you miss his touch as he rests his hands on his knees. Looking down at your palm, you realize that he’s left a single penny behind.

“What’s this?”

“A penny”

“I can see that”, you smile slightly, “what’s it doing in my hand?”

“This may shock you, but when I was younger, I wasn’t much of a talker. Sometimes it was like pullin’ teeth to get me to talk-”

“I know the feeling”

“Yes, well, my Grandpa noticed how it didn’t come easy to me. So sometimes when he noticed I had a lot going on he would hand me a penny, and without having to ask, I would just start talkin’”

“A literal penny for your thoughts” you realize outloud. You grasp the penny, staring as you hold it between your fingers.

“It doesn’t mean you have to say anything”, Bob rushes out, “Just- if you want, you’re free to share your thoughts with me. No judgment” This is quite possibly one of the sweetest things anyone has ever shared with you, and staring at the penny you know you’re safe with Bob. Safe to share your feelings, safe from… anything really.

“I really want to tell Rooster to go fuck himself.” Bob gives you a small chuckle.

“Well, I think Phoenix may be doing that as we speak.” Good, you think to yourself. You shift the coin between your fingers and thumb before deciding to speak again.

“I was so sad, for so many years. And now I’m just starting to feel angry. Every time I see his face, I just can’t stop myself from laying into him.” It’s quiet for a moment as Bob waits to let you continue. “I don’t think I’m asking for too much, or that I went too far. And he just- God, he just laid it all out there for everyone.” Bob notices your fist beginning to clench and he slowly reaches over to grasp your hand in his.

“I’m sorry. And if it means anything, I don’t think you’re asking for too much.” You hadn’t even realized you started crying again until Bob’s thumb was swiping a stray tear away. Your breath catches in your throat and his hand moves away quickly, as if touching your face had hurt him. He clears his throat. “Were you going to wait for your dad, or did you want me to take you home?”

“Home? I thought I was supposed to meet Sylvia today?”

“Oh, yeah”, Bob chokes back, surprise coating his features, “We can go to… my place then?”

“If that’s alright with you?”

“Of course it is”, Bob says almost too quickly. “I mean”, he coughs, “Sylvia, she would love to meet ya”. And then he gives you a smile. You know the one, it’s closed mouth but it causes his cheeks to scrunch up beneath his eyes, taking over half his face. It’s almost enough to make you forget about this whole day.

He stands, offering you his hands to help you off the ground. He doesn’t leave you immediately at first, he just stands in front of you as if assessing the situation. Weighing his options. Glancing down at his watch, he looks at the door, “I think everyone should have gone home for the day. But if you want, you can wait in here while I grab my stuff?” You nod, taken aback at his thoughtfulness once again.

He leaves for a short bit while you grab your own bag from your locker. He knocks on the door once again, signaling his return as you make your way through the halls. The setting sun illuminates the parking lot and glares at you through the glass doors. Bob opens the door allowing you to go first as you spot his truck and make your way to it. The ache in your head is starting to come back and you can’t wait to take your hair out of the tight bun it’s in now.

“Mantis!”, you turn around as someone calls your name and immediate regret fills your system. You roll your eyes at the sight of Rooster walking toward you as you turn to keep walking, Bob right behind you.

“Mantis!”, he yells again as if you didn’t hear him the first time. “Come on Bug!” You stop in your tracks, rage once again emanating from your pores. Turning on your heel, you drop your bag onto the asphalt. This catches Rooster by surprise as he stops right before you.

“Do NOT call me that”, you grit through a clenched jaw as you point your finger at him. You can’t help the way your arm shakes in anger.

“Sorry”, he lets out dejectedly, placing his hands on his hips. Even if your brow wasn’t furrowed from squinting in the sun you have a feeling you’d still be staring at him with the same expression.

“Oh, so you do know that word”, you scoff. Rooster bites his tongue as he looks down at his feet. “And I’m not in the mood to talk, so save it for someone else who doesn’t want to hear it.” In the distance you’re aware of Bob throwing his bag in the back of his truck as he grabs yours and does the same. 

“I just want to-”

“I told you, I’m not in the mood”, you move to turn to Bob’s truck as Rooster reaches out and grabs your wrist.

“Mantis, c’mon-” The grip on your wrist sends your senses into overdrive as anger takes over. As he tugs on your wrist, you turn and collide your free fist into his face. It’s funny really, you weren’t aiming for anything in particular but you land it right on his cheekbone. It was enough force and surprise to knock him backwards

“Jesus Christ!” he shouts, grasping his face in his hand. Tears begin to well up in your eyes for the second time today as you shake out your hand. “What the hell is your problem?” He yells at you.

“Carole would be so disappointed in you”, you rasp out, cradling your hand. You stare Rooster down as he looks up at you in shock, until he can’t stand to anymore and tears his eyes away. Bob’s standing right behind you as you turn and bump into his chest.

“Are you ok?” he asks, lightly resting his hands on your shoulders.

“No”, you whisper, “Let’s just get out of here.” You don’t dare to spare a look back at Rooster, but Bob does as he leads you to his truck. The man is standing at his full height now with his shoulders slumped. The skin just under his eye is already starting to swell as he watches you walk away this time.

The ride back to Bob’s is quiet as you stare out the window. The radio’s humming quietly in the background and he doesn’t dare disrupt the silence, so he takes a glance at your hand. The skin around your knuckles is slightly irritated from the force you punched Rooster with, but other than that it doesn’t look too bad. He knew you were tough, but he never thought he’d see you punch someone in the face. If it had to be someone, he was glad it was Rooster though. That guy had it coming, especially after what he said today. You’re still staring out the window with a look of indifference, and you still had the penny he gave to you earlier, but you hadn’t said anything about what Rooster had revealed. So, he wasn’t going to push it until you were ready or wanted to talk about it.

You’re pulled out of your trance once the truck stops in Bob’s driveway. He grabs both of your bags before you’re able to grab yours, but he stops as he’s about to open the door.

“Just a warning, it’s probably a mess in here, so I apologize.”

“I have a feeling that your definition of a mess is my definition of clean.” He gives you a slight smile as he opens the door.

“Only one way to find out.” Opening the door you find, just as you suspected, an immaculate house. There may be a couple dog toys lying around, but that’s about it. You’re startled a little bit as Bob whistles, “Syl! Come ‘ere girl!” You smile at the accent coming through, and then the thump of something on the second floor running down the stairs. Sylvia comes barreling down the hallway as fast as her claws against the hardwood allow her. Bob is immediately on his knees in front of her, scratching behind her ears and speaking in what you can only describe as baby-talk, “Oh Syl, I’m so sorry. Daddy was gone for such a long time today wasn’t he?” You’re attempting to hold back a laugh, eyebrows shooting up at his use of the word “daddy”.

Sylvia’s tail stops wagging as she notices you standing behind her dad. Bob looks back at you and then at the dog, “Now Sylvia, this is Mantis. Mantis is a very good friend of mine, and I know she has a funny name, but you’re just gonna have to get over that, ok?” You can’t help but chuckle at how talkative he is with her, and even as you stare at her enormous brown eyes you immediately crave her approval. You start to kneel down next to Bob, but before you’re able to get on your knees Sylvia is cowering away and running back upstairs. You huff out in frustration as you stare at her retreating form.

“Hey, it’s alright”, Bob explains, “Like I said, she’s kinda skittish, and it takes a little bit for her to warm up to new people.” You nod in understanding as Bob leads you to his living room. It’s fairly simple, and again very clean. Bob tells you to take a seat as he grabs you a glass of water from the kitchen directly behind the living area.

“So daddy, huh?” The glass just about slips out of Bob’s hand upon hearing your use of the word. He swallows, taking a moment to collect himself.

“Uhm”, he coughs, “Yeah, I don’t know. It just sort of happened.”

“It’s cute”, you smile to yourself. Bob returns with a glass of water and an ice-pack wrapped in a kitchen towel. He awkwardly offers it to you as you accept it.

“For your hand”

“Oh yeah, thanks.” You lift it in appreciation before placing it on your knuckles. Wincing at first at the sensitivity. Bob sits a little farther down on the couch and watches you fiddle with something in your pocket. You tentatively reach for the penny, turning it over before handing it over to Bob. He laughs through his nose, nodding as a smile plays on his face.

“Come on, it’s your turn now.” Bob begins to chew on his bottom lip, avoiding your eyes. “If you want to ask me about it, it’s ok”, you let out more solemnly. He glances over at you, huffing out a sigh.

“How’s your hand?” He decides on, making you laugh.

“Not what I meant, but it’s ok. A little stiff.” You get the sense that he wants to know, but is getting shy with you again. And even though he doesn’t ask, you get an overwhelming urge to tell him. Taking in a shaky breath, you start in the only place you know where to, “Do you know how I got my call-sign?” He shakes his head.

“Although, I do recall you telling Hangman you’d bite his fucking head off” The two of you laugh. Sylvia, just as sneaky as her dad, pops her head up out of nowhere, resting it on Bob’s thigh. His hand instinctively goes to pet her head as you try not to acknowledge her existence, hoping she’ll make her way over to you.

“That’s what I like to tell people. But, no. When I was a kid, I was deathly afraid of insects, still am if I’m being honest. But, there was one incident”, you smile at the memory, “Where I was at the park, and I turned to look behind me and there was a praying mantis, just sitting on my shoulder. I, of course, freaked out and was trying to get it off me, but it wasn’t until Carole- Bradley’s mom, calmed me down where she was able to carefully pick it up and take it off me.” You’re laughing a little at this point, and Bob can’t help but smile at your own.

“She got me to stop crying and explained that it was just a little bug”, you swallow, staring down at your iced hand, “like me.” Bob’s face softens as he remembers Rooster’s words. “That became her nickname for me, and when she died and Bradley left, nobody called me it again until-” You cut yourself off, choked up just talking about Carole, and remembering how Bradley used to be. Before he was Rooster.

“Anyway, I hadn’t had a run-in with a praying mantis until flight school. I was out on a hike with the rest of my class, and what do I see on my shoulder when I turn around? A damn praying mantis. I screamed again, just like the first time, and everyone thought it was hilarious. So, the name Mantis stuck. It just felt like…” you struggle to find the word.

“Fate”, Bob finishes the sentence for you. You look up and find his eyes trained on you. Giving him a slight smile, you nod your head.

“Yeah, exactly.” Your eyes remain on his, and your heart beats a little faster. “So I’m not exactly bug, but that’s ok, because I don’t think anyone but Carole can call me that. Even if Bradley used to-” You look away, only to find Sylvia standing between you and Bob. Having must inched her way closer while you spoke, “I don’t want him to anymore.”

“I think that makes a lot of sense, and I also think Mantis suits you.” You smile and dare to reach your hand out to Sylvia, who simply sniffs the approaching limb. She nudges her nose closer, sniffing your palm as you very gently scratch her ear, much like Bob did earlier. She leans into it, daring to walk closer to you. Taking in a deep breath, you let it out before you lose the courage.

“It wasn’t a regular thing”, Bob’s loving gaze at Sylvia falls as he looks up at you, “Just when she got really angry, or I reminded her too much of my dad I guess.” Your hand stops petting Sylvia as you stare at the glass of water on the coffee table, the condensation dripping down onto the coaster Bob thoughtfully placed underneath it. “Carole and my dad found bruises a couple different times, but I was too embarrassed to tell them how they got there. But she knew. I guess Bradley must have known, too, or he wouldn’t have brought it up today. I think they tried to do something about it, but they wouldn’t grant full custody to my dad because of his work, and… I don’t really know what happened after that.” Sylvia’s head now rests on your thigh, much like it did earlier with Bob. You grant her a small smile, moving your hand once again to give her some attention.

You don’t have to look up to know that Bob’s staring at you. Your nose starts to tingle, alerting you to the fact that tears were starting to form in your eyes. “It got better when she remarried, her focus wasn’t on me as much anymore. She was busy with her husband and his kids.” You scrunch your nose, attempting to rid yourself of the feeling, but it’s no use. The tears start to fall and you hastily wipe them away with your free hand. “Jesus, sorry”, you say as you give him a watery laugh.

“Don’t be sorry”, your tears continue to fall, “None of this is your fault.” Bob’s words hit you deep as you stare at the ceiling, willing these tears to stop, but they just won’t. “Can- Can I hug you?” You look over at Bob and give him a fast nod of your head.

“Yes please”, you whisper. He moves along the couch to get closer to you, and then wraps you up in both his arms as you do the same. Even through both of your flight suits, Bob is warm as you melt into him. Your eyes close as you breathe him in. He smells like sweat and jet fuel from being in a plane all day, and you’re sure you smell the same. It’s comforting nonetheless.

Bob just wants to pick you up and take you far away from here. Away from everyone that dares to make you hurt. He feels you sag against him and he pulls you just the tiniest bit closer as he breathes in the scent of your shampoo. He’s realizing now it’s been a while since he’s hugged someone like this, and maybe it’s the case for you, too. His hand goes to soothe along your back and your eyes flutter shut at the motion. He remembers you saying your mom wasn’t too happy when she found out about the Naval Academy, and he doesn’t want to think about what happened after the fact.

“I’m sorry you have to go through all that”, he whispers just above your ear.

“It’s alright, things are starting to look up”, you sniffle, pulling him just a little bit tighter.

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