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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 11 months ago
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The girls are plottinggggg
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#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wen chao#wang lingjiao#Realizing she was supposed to have an upper lip mole was a cold slap in the face. So sorry ma'am. I won't forget again.#They are evil dumbass 4 evil dumbass and I think we are all missing out on the sheer potential of the comedy between these two.#They have way too much power and are using it for the wrong reasons - which makes them truly great villains.#And when things don't go their way they become piles of whining sludge.#Wang Lingjiao is forever fascinating to me even though we only get crumbs about her.#She's a servant girl who's greatest asset is her beauty and her attractiveness.#Meaning she's had a life being in the gaze of people with significant positions of power over her.#I can't help but read her childishness and petty tantrums as someone who has finally been given the chance to not feel powerless.#If she was a more virtuous type we might 'like' her more but honestly...I don't think she would have survived to this point.#WLJ has only known power hierarchies her whole life. Probably accused of seduction before she even understood what that meant.#I love contrasting her with mianmian because they have similar(ish) backgrounds but different approaches to moving forwards#But WLJ's story is about flying too close to the sun and mianmian's is about going too close to the water.#Like the sea mist dragging her down into complacency - all the sect powerplays are mandatory to 'go along with' if she wants to climb-#-the social ladder. Yet she is the cautionary tale (and a foil to JGY as well) she leaves before sacrificing her own morals.#Mianmian flies away with her wings only slightly plucked while those who sacrificed everything to reach for the top crash and burn.
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savageboar · 28 days ago
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i don't know why everyone on reddit insists cleaning clogged filter media with tap is gonna INSTANTLY kill any bacteria and crash your tank cycle. if the water was THAT toxic/full of chemicals we wouldn't be able to use it.
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mariocki · 5 months ago
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A Bullet Is Waiting (1954)
"I hope you don't think that I'm taking your side against Mr. Munson. All those nice things that you did, like taking care of the lamb and getting supper ready, I saw through them easily. You're probably everything that Mr. Munson says you are."
"Oh, I'm a very bad character."
#a bullet is waiting#1954#american cinema#john farrow#thames williamson#casey robinson#jean simmons#rory calhoun#stephen mcnally#brian aherne#dimitri tiomkin#howard welsch#film noir#allegedly....#indicator included this on one of their columbia noir sets‚ and most online sources describe it as film noir‚ but honestly i just don't see#it... it's just a crime film from the 50s‚ that doesn't make it noir. actually in spirit this is closer to a western#or maybe a 50s style romantic comedy (only a decidedly unfunny one) (and with a messed up notion of romance)#this is a mess tbh. scrappy young Rory Calhoun is a prisoner being transported by sheriff McNally; their plane crashes in the wilderness#where farmer Simmons must take them in and shelter them. it's not a hugely original idea but it has the potential for an ok film#except that Calhoun soon tackles young Jean in an attempt to force a kiss on her; this obviously leads her to fall in love‚ how could she#not. he and McNally spend the rest of the film lecturing her on her foolish womanly ways‚ until her father finally returns to this cursed#triangle and... scolds his daughter for her idiotic feminine emotions. the whole film is a sexist sludge masquerading as some kind of love#story (and building to an ending so absurdly cheerful and improbable that it makes the brain spin). still‚ it does feature some very cute#animals (many lovely sheep including a sweet little lamb that sleeps in Simmons' bed with her‚ a good dog and some chickens)#and Jean is cute as a button with her short hair and big‚ mournful eyes turned up at Rory every time he acts an ass#not by any means a very good film‚ or even quite good‚ or maybe not good at all. but... yeah idk. it certainly had sheep
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shoechoe · 1 year ago
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man i am glad i didn't get the tumblr layout update
#not jojo related#i do not want tumblr to become like twitter... i was here instead for a reason tumblr#you know this reminds me of the whole coke vs. pepsi thing that happened a while ago in the 80s#pepsi did an experiment where they blindfolded people and gave them coke and pepsi to see which drink they preferred#and it turns out that people actually preferred pepsi by a large margin#so coke freaked out and decided that they would alter their recipe to taste more like pepsi#but it turned out that only resulted in a loss of sales#coke drinkers didn't like the recipe change and pepsi drinkers would just drink pepsi#that's what comes to mind every time these big social media websites further assimilate into one big sludge of the same thing#(personally i think coke and pepsi are both equally whatever-tasting but that's not the point)#like... the appeal of having more than 1 website is that they're different. there's a variety#yeah twitter is crashing and burning but that doesn't mean you should copy their layout...#the tumblr userbase chose tumblr because it was its own unique thing. trying to accomodate twitter users by making tumblr identical-#-to twitter is just going to alienate most of the userbase and probably won't do much for the twitter people either#and obviously every website adding a little shorts/tiktok copycat feature is just infuriating. nobody wants tumblr live#i have xkit though so if they do decide to make this layout permanent xkit will probably make a fix for it and i'll be fine lol#idk. just my thoughts
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juggalogojackerbox · 2 years ago
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I have two moms so I forgot it was even fathers day yesterday but I drew Onycraft with his kids a day late regardless, dad time %)
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andellaheartz · 2 years ago
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ill be the first to admit that weirdly enough, your socialstuck amino has helped with my own mental shit? like, somehow seeing this little thing thats gross and weird has helped me not hate my own grosser and weird depressive traits. i dunno! tldr love your wet cat its good :]
AWA OMG ⁉️ IM GLAD THAT THE MOIST THING HELPED U WITH UR STUFF /gen
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alfamangle · 2 years ago
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You've always had a guardian angel, a being who's sole purpose is to keep you out of harms way. A friend. A canary you keep in the cage of yourself to warn you of danger.
As a kid she's nudged you away from traffic, preventing you from falling into ditches, and from petting wild animals with saliva filled with diseases bound to kill. A benevolent force. A welcome one. Its glistening sword, light always reflecting off the metal of the blade to make it seem like it glowed with the light of the midday sun, always blocking any hazard from ever reaching you.
As you grew older, she stepped in more. After all the older you are the more hazards you would encounter. Her hair the color of golden hour spilled over her shoulder as she stepped in the way of your car.
"Oh, you know you can't do that, dear, you know the hazards of driving. What if you drive off the road, don't turn fast enough and crash headfirst into a tree at full speed, or miss a light and crash into another car killing you both? We can't have that, can we?" Her voice sang, like songbirds given human speech. Her wings blocked your view of the vehicle. You asked someone else to drive that day. And the day after. And the day after that. It has been so long since you touched the driver's wheel.
You try walking to a stranger to talk to them, before you're stopped. Sword placed between you and them. They don't notice her, of course. She's your angel, not theirs. She sings of the danger of strangers and how you might be harmed by them. If not that you might embarrass yourslef and they would remember, oh they would remember. Everyone would remember. You can't have that.
You like talking to strangers, it's always a nice experience. But she sings it repeatedly until you relent. Either way, you cannot walk through a sword. Talking from across a room is silly. You mustn't be seen as silly.
Her robe the color of sunsets sweeps the ground as you place foam on the edges of sharp tables in your house. She warned that you could trip and fall and break a tooth on the edges. She sang it til it was true and you prevented yourself from harm.
Its been ages since you truely went outside. You mustn't drive it's too dangerous turned into you mustn't be in a veihicle it's too dangerous turned into you mustn't walk on sidewalks it's too close to the road turned into you mustn't go outside there's too many things out there that could bring you to harm. Her twilight colored eyes stare into yours as she stands in your doorway, gripping her sword tightly. She still sings of things that could harm you, things you could do that you musnt or else your world, and by extension yourself, will come to harm, and anything else she could think of to make you 'safer'.
You haven't spoken to your friends in a very long time. Friends will remember embarassing moments and failures much better than strangers, she states the melody of her tune feeling ever so slightly off, you love your friends and they love you back you are sure of it. You cannot say no to a sword and a song repeated enough times you can hear it in your sleep so it rings true like a tocsin.
Your house is a shell of itself. You musnt have sharp edges or pointed things, as you could harm youself or some other object. You cant have scissors, as you might cut up some important document. You cannot allow that to happen. Your fireplace is always dormant and cold with is doors shut to keep out the wind that crawls down the chimney and to keep yourself from falling into it. You cannot have a knife sharper than a butter knife, as you may cut something or someone. Even items that once were 'safe' no longer are. Its a safe life yet not a good one.
"Its for your health, dear, you mustn't come to harm. That is my purpose, you know this." she crooned after you asked her what all of this was for. Soft feathers pet your head.
You can't keep living life like this, could you?
Reminder: Guardian angels must keep their human safe. They cannot do anything else. They cannot harm their human.
You confront her in your bedroom as she sings about how you really shouldn't keep the windows open, dear. You grab the sword out of her hand, its much longer than any sword a human is meant to hold, of course, but you weild it all the same.
You push the angel to the ground and turn the sword against its owner. She cannot do much against this but beg and plead and sing about how bringing her to harm would ultimately bring you to harm. Angels aren't prepared to be turned on, to have someone resent them. Twinking night pools on the brown carpet and is splattered on the silver of the blade, a foot holds down a thrashing wing. She continues to toll like a broken bell, a scratched record replaying the same segment of song over and over and over. You raise her sword once more as the morning sun's light spills out of the open window into your room.
You can't kill an angel. They aren't mortal in the same way you and I are. Their life is tied to the human they are assigned to. So there she lays in your bedroom since that day, still singing her songs of how to keep you safe. She has stopped singing for her safety, either no longer registering the fact she's now pinned to the floor or choosing to ignore it. You've stopped listening to her always now, she still convinces you to avoid some things that most people wouldn't, but its better now. You ride the bus to the locall arcade. You promised to meet your friend there afterall.
You’ve always had a literal guardian angel- but she’s currently bleeding out on your bedroom floor.
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nochepsicodelica · 1 month ago
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You and Toji are sitting at a table at a bar, talking about different things that went on throughout your days over some drinks. Toji tells you about how Shiu's been a real asshole lately, because his marriage is hanging on by a thread and he hasn't gotten laid in almost a month. He gives you a look that you interpret as him saying 'thank fuck that's not us' to which you respond with a little smirk.
When it's your turn, you tell him about how the new hire broke the copy machine, knocked over and broke the water gallon for the water dispenser, and crashed into someone, spilling hot coffee all over their shirt, all in the course of one day.
"That poor fucker's cursed," Toji says, amusement riddling his expression as he brings his glass of whiskey to his lips.
"He looked like he really needed a hug by the end of the day," you add, biting back a smile, before you take a sip of your own drink.
"Tell me you didn't," Toji says, taking in the seemingly telling look on your face. "Ma."
"I'm kidding. It's jokes, baby. I have no interest in hugging someone I haven't spoken a single word to."
Toji flicks your forehead, watching with a grin as you bring a hand up to rub the sting away. "Gotta piss, be right back, doll. Want another drink before I come back?"
"I'll wait for you to finish yours," you say, to which he nods before standing up from his seat.
"Be right back," Toji repeats, affectionately setting a heavy hand on your head, before he heads off in the direction of the restrooms.
You pull your phone out of your pocket and scroll through your socials while you wait. Altogether, Toji was gone for no longer than four minutes, and yet somehow, that was enough time for a rando to pull a chair up to your little table and start a conversation with you.
"Hey," he starts. "Why are you sitting here looking all lonely?"
You turn your head to face the person with the unfamiliar voice, slightly widening your eyes as if to question if he's talking to you. He looks at you with raised eyebrows, awaiting your response. "Oh, i'm not here alone. My boyfriend is in the bathroom," you respond, with a polite smile, before returning your attention to your phone.
"Ah. What kind of man leaves a pretty thing like you by herself in a place like this?" The stranger says, in a tone that almost seems pitiful towards you.
You look at him again and attempt to keep your expression neutral. "He'll be back any second now. He's just taking a piss, i'll be fine. Unless you're here to make things troubling for me."
The man chuckles, entertained by your quick shift in tone. "With a feisty attitude like that and a pretty mouth to keep up, it seems like you want me to get you in trouble."
You furrow your eyebrows, blatantly offended by his inappropriate insinuation. It's disturbing to see how he turned your warning into something sexual.
"I already told you, I have a boyfriend. Try someone else," you respond, no longer hiding your irritation.
Toji scans the room for the table you're sitting at, locating you and who-the-fuck in three seconds. This man looks awfully cozy with you, leaning in close every time he speaks to you, so he doesn't stand around any longer and quickly makes his way back to you and this new "friend".
"You sure you don't want another drink, doll?" Toji asks, sitting down in front of you, again, his gaze darting between you and this pocket square looking man. There's a difference between your demeanor from before he left and now. You clearly aren't comfortable, anymore.
"That's it? That is your supposed boyfriend?" The man asks, attempting to minimize Toji by referring to him as if he's nothing in comparison to himself. "Oh, princess. You see this watch?" He asks, raising the cuff of his sleeve to fully reveal his golden watch. "Four thousand dollars, and that's chump change."
You look at Toji and pull his hand into your shaky one, giving him a forced smile. Toji keeps his eyes on yours as the stranger continues spewing arrogant sludge about how much money he makes a year and how even the luxury car he has parked outside didn't put the smallest dent in his wallet.
"You would have it so good with me, baby," he continues blabbering. His hand goes to your wrist, a gesture that Toji quickly puts an end to by aggressively shoving the man's hand away, your empty glass clattering on the table from the force. Toji would have snapped the man's wrist and twisted his hand off, but he didn't want to scare you with the bloodshed. He feels like he's buzzing from the anger bubbling inside, and surely it won't be long before he acts out.
"Don't fucking touch her," Toji spits, glaring at the man with an expression that would have put him six feet under, if looks could kill.
Your heartbeat is in your ears and your blood is boiling. This man is disgusting for being persistent towards someone who doesn't want him. It's masochism, at this point, with the amount of times that you've made it clear that you're not interested.
The man snorts, snobbishly. "He brought you here, of all places. Even just glancing at him, you can tell this cheap ass place is all he can afford. He'll never be able to give you everything you want, so just come with me, doll face."
You rip your hand out of Toji's grasp and stand from your chair, delivering a resounding blow to the man's already hideous face. Tables and chairs wobble as he tries to keep his balance, but when you quickly strike him again, hard enough to increase the pain you felt in your knuckles with that first hit, you manage to knock him onto the ground.
"Fuck you, you fucking asshole. You don't know shit!" You grit out, dropping down to try and land another hit to the man's bleeding face. By now, Toji is behind you, restraining your arms and pulling you back as a small crowd begins to form to observe the commotion.
"Ma, come on. Let's just go."
"Let me dent his fucking face in, Toji," you mutter, writhing in his grip.
The vile man manages to sit up, dabbing his fingertips against his busted lip. Though there is red blossoming on his face, his lips still form an amused, twisted smile. He laughs as he watches you get reeled back by Toji, seething as you are dragged away like a child having a meltdown in the middle of a store.
"Hey-- Hey, I said let's go," Toji says, his tone sharper when you continue to try to break out of his hold to fight the idiotic sociopath.
You take a deep breath and stop, willingly letting Toji take you away from this chaos you created in his defense. His hand rests on the nape of your neck, as he guides you through the stuffy bar and leads you outside to the car.
"Stop pacing," Toji says, watching as you threaten to make the asphalt beneath your feet waste away with every step you take in your heated state.
"Fucking asshole, dickhead, motherfucker." You groan, loudly, furiously, before covering your face with your hands. "It's fine, it's fine," you mumble to yourself.
"Then, stop pacing," he repeats, watching on as you walk the same steps, over and over, as if you're on autopilot. "Ma, eyes. Eyes." His hands go to your shoulders, manually forcing you to halt your movement. "Listen to me. I said eyes."
"I'm so... I can't stand still," you say, weakly.
"Stop looking around. Right here," Toji instructs, lifting one hand from your shoulder and pointing two fingers at his eyes. You release a shaky puff of air and hold his gaze as best as you can.
"Talk when you're ready," he says, following your eyes whenever they derail from his.
You aren't ready soon enough. You feel like your heart is trying to burst out of your chest and the adrenaline coursing through you isn't helping at all. Your hand hurts. Your knuckles feel bruised and they're bloody. The night might be ruined, but you felt your reaction was the only way to release the pain you felt when that nothing started talking the way he did about Toji. All you can think to do is hug Toji to prevent yourself from crying about your cause for attacking the gross man. It's all so much. You've never felt so strongly for someone, to the point where you hit a stranger for insulting them. It's scary how Toji brings that defensive, yet, offensive side out of you.
Strong, heavy arms reciprocate your embrace, keeping your tense body close. You feel warm and safe, his scent and the pressure of his hold managing to slowly calm your unsteady heartbeat. After a few seconds of quietness, you turn your head and rest the side of your face on him, finally prepared to speak.
"I didn't like how he was talking about you, Toji. He was talking shit even before you came back, and I hated it. I hated it so much, that I felt nauseous and if I hadn't done something, I would have been sick."
Toji sighs, not out of disappointment or feelings of that sort, but because you seeking out danger for his sake, was not something he ever wanted to see.
"Doll, you know how much I love you."
This sounds like a layer of sugar preceding a talking to. You're trying not to be nervous before the scolding even begins, but you feel the need to brace yourself, as well.
"I love you, too," you mumble.
Toji knows it. He's known it all along, and the events that transpired tonight were just another way of you proving your love and showing how much he matters to you.
"Want you to look at me," he says, lowering his arms on your back, allowing you to make the space necessary to give him your attention. He offers you a soft smile. "Don't get all fidgety on me after you just ripped a stranger's face open."
"I feel like you're about to yell at me," you say, lowly.
That makes him want to laugh, but he keeps his amusement to a minimum, since you're clearly anticipating something terrible.
"Nah. When have I ever raised my voice at you?"
"Never."
"Exactly. Never, and I won't start now, but I want you to get this through your pretty head... It's not your job to beat people up for me."
"I know, but-"
Toji shakes his head. "Hold on, mama. Let me finish talking, then it'll be your turn."
Your heart feels like it's in the depths of your stomach, but you nod, and allow him to continue talking.
"I'm not mad at you, i'm not gonna yell at you. Just wanna keep you safe, is all. That guy was already a fuckin' weirdo, harassing you like that and trying to get you to go with him while I was right there. I wouldn't be surprised if he was into hitting women, too, if he's so comfortable with making them uncomfortable."
It's quiet while you think of what to say. You don't want this to escalate into something that turns you against each other, when it started out as an act of love. You could argue about how you did this to defend him, but in the end, you know his own need to protect you, will stomp all over your arguments.
"I'm sorry we had to leave, but i'm not sorry for the reason behind it. I don't regret what I did."
"Ma..."
"No, Toji. He didn't even know you and yet he still said things that aren't fair." Your voice quiets down, the beginnings of stronger emotions threatening to outwardly reveal themselves. "He insulted you. He questioned your abilities as my boyfriend when he saw me alone— even after I told him you just went to the bathroom. He judged you superficially, he said you can't give me everything I want and--" you pause, interrupted by a shaky inhale and the painful lump in your throat. "Sorry," you mumble, when the first set of tears roll down your cheeks.
"No, you're alright," Toji says, in response, his warm hands coming up to cup your cheeks, thumbs wiping away your fleeing tears. There's a small pinch in his brows. Why are you crying? It's something he can't ask you, because he knows that if he makes a big spectacle out of it, you'll end up drowning in your tears and shutting down everything you have to say. He resorts to keeping your cheeks dry and encouraging you to keep talking.
"Go on, mama."
You sniff, before picking up where you left off. "I don't care about all that, Toji. I don't care where we go to spend time together, because we're together. I need you, not for you to buy me things or take me to fancy places. That's not what I'm with you for."
Your heart is beating fast, again, its rhythm no longer controlled by fear or nerves, but instead the focus that Toji has on you. He's good at holding eye contact with you, something that occasionally gets distracting if you become too aware of it. You notice that his expression is softer. Maybe it's your brief flash of tears or the way you are always subconsciously finding a way to indirectly recite some of the reasons for why you love him.
"I love you, Toji. That means I won't just sit around and let someone talk about you like you're worthless. And I know, I know you can handle things like this on your own and you don't need me, but it was hard to listen to that."
You pause, as if to give him a break from your bulldozing heart. Silence takes over the moment, both of you just looking at each other. Toji's speechlessness has you wondering if you spilled too much of your heart out to him. You know some things are better left to be figured out, such as the range of a person's love, and yet you just poured without measure. "You can call me crazy if you want to."
Toji's shit-eating grin is unexpected, but it's definitely a sight that lifts some of the heaviness you feel in your chest.
"You love me," Toji says, still smiling like a doofus. He knows your serious facade will crack if he looks at you like this for long enough. He can already see a shift in the expression of your eyes and the way your lips are pressing together just a little more. He tilts his head slightly, a gesture that pushes you even further towards that pretty smile he wants to see. When you finally crack and give into his charm, you do so with a mutter of 'you're so dumb.'
"I'm glad that's what you got out of my rambling," you say, wholeheartedly and in better spirits. Toji pulls you in, this time, his soothing warmth and familiar scent tangling around you, again. His chin rests on top of your head and his arms secure themselves around you, tightly.
"I'm not gonna call you crazy, ma. It's not what I think. Also, don't go saying things that aren't true. I do need you," Toji says, his voice level kept at an intimate volume, as if there are other people there in the parking lot with you. His words are solely meant for you to hear anyway and getting them to you in this manner ensures that you won't go home with your heart feeling heavy, after a talk that was meant to comfort you.
"You know, I don't care what other people think— and that's not to say I don't appreciate you throwing a few punches for my sake. You're a sweetheart and you care so much, but if it's a stranger saying some unimportant, dumb shit, it takes a lot for it to actually get to me. If it really bothered me, they'd be gone."
"Yeah... I know," you mumble, into his shirt, knowing you would do it again and again— countless times. You loosen your arms around Toji and he does the same, his hands dragging towards your waist after you separate.
"How's that hand?" Toji asks, picking your wrist up before you can even respond. He whistles at the sight of the slight swelling and the dry specks of crimson spotted over your knuckles.
"A little tender," you say, feeling a tinge of fear when his other hand lifts off your waist to feel the damage.
"Looks real good on your pretty hand," he says, dragging his index finger over the protruding bones of your hand.
"Does it?" You ask, your barely there smile falling when you wince at the little bit of pressure Toji applies.
"No," he responds, bringing it up to his lips and pressing a kiss to the sore area. You wince again when his thumb drags over your skin with slightly more pressure than before. "It doesn't. We'll ice it when we get home, alright?" He lets up on the torturous touching, but keeps your hand in his. The words aren't meant to hurt you. He doesn't mean them and he hopes he communicates that with the way he still opts to hold your hand. Your hands will always be pretty to him, he just can't say that to you, right now. Not if it serves as the smallest bit of encouragement for you to repeat what happened earlier, in the future.
"Okay." You nod.
"Gimme a kiss and we can go home or wherever, if you wanna stay out."
You tilt your head up and wait for his lips to meet yours. It's a gentle brush of lips, but the second Toji's hands start slipping under the back of your sweater and your shirt, you know it's going to be more than a single kiss. You can feel the night's cold wind nipping at your skin, as his hands go higher up, his fingertips reaching just below the hooks of your bra. To your surprise, he unhooks the garment, causing you to quickly press your hands to your chest when the cups loosen, to prevent them from fully sliding down.
"Toji," you manage to utter out during the wave of kisses. You turn your head, receiving a kiss that was meant for your lips, on your cheek.
"Yeah... I think we should go home," he murmurs, against your skin. "Maybe we can rock the car a little bit before we go, hm?" Toji smirks when you let out that flustered giggle he's so familiar with. He presses another kiss to your cheek before you turn to face him, again.
"Okay, but let's not blow it all here. We have a nice and comfortable bed at home. Let's add another good night to it."
You don't miss the way Toji's lustfully lidded, green eyes, keep glancing down at your hands on your chest, or how he's mindlessly caressing your bare waist, under your shirt.
"Alright, ma." He pulls out his car keys and with the press of a button, the car unlocks with a beep and the brief, dull sound of flipping locks. "Get inside."
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noddytheornithopod · 1 year ago
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someone start a campaign to get sludge into crash team rumble
if we can get iron checkpoint crate into nitro fueled, we can get sludge into rumble
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yeahivegotanaccount · 1 year ago
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You know, when no matter how hard you try each good thing you try to think about brings up harsh memories.
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puppyvenom · 2 years ago
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come to the conclusion i seen to only like 2 types of men
1: guys that like gorillaz too much. (my only two boyfriends)
2: bartenders. emo bartenders. (the last 2 guys i’ve had crushes on)
i think i need to be put down this is not okay
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heavenlyraindrops · 1 month ago
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The Devil Made Me Do It | Arcane | Silco x Reader | Chapter One
also on AO3 and Quotev | visit the first tag to find other chapters | warnings: pre- s1 (for now), profanity, mentions of death, addiction, and prostitution
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summary:
In the midst of an unfortunate run-in with the enforcers, you meet the young revolutionary Silco, and by extension, his friends Vander and Felicia. Growing close friends, you get through life in the undercity together, determined to make Zaun a better place. Until tragedy strikes, and betrayal and carelessness stabs hard enough to turn you bitter. Years later as time solidifies the scars, Silco proves to be a thorn in your side. You, in his. Hatred festers. And your world cracks further open.
Chapter One:
The undercity was certainly something.
Especially at night, when shadows extended their smoky tendrils to allow those dabbling in unsavoury business to lurk, gloomy buildings hiding things you’d be safer off not knowing within. People milling about, going about their private, dangerous business.
Water splashed across the street as your foot landed in a puddle, ankle twisting the wrong way as you tore through the filthy streets, enforcers hot on your heels. All this for heckling an officer? You clutched your shawl around you as the wind almost buffered it away.
It was ridiculous.
After bumping into a large man, a mother and her child, and knocking over a crate of sludge-y creatures, shouts trailing after you, you found an alleyway to disappear into. You scrambled up some wooden beams, eventually emerging onto the flat roof of the low, squatting building. You watched the idiotic Pilties run straight ahead, missing your small detour entirely, and scoffed, stepping away from the edge.
You turned, and made your way across the rooftops of Zaun. 
You’d reached an impasse. Well, not really- nothing a simple jump couldn’t fix. You squinted down into the dusty darkness of the narrow alley below your feet. This part of the undercity was silent- but you could hear the lapping water, and knew you were close to the river.
Vaulting over a concrete bar and pushing off with your feet, you landed on the other side of the gap with a thud. The roof shook, and you yelped as a tile slid off the edge, and crashed into the darkness.
Holding your breath, you heard nothing. The water continued to rumble. You turned to leave.
Until- 
“Fuck.”
You froze in horror. 
Creeping back towards the piped edge of the roof, weight on the backs of your feet, you peered into the darkness. The glowing end of a cigarette burned orange. You gulped.
A man emerged, stepping into your view. His brow was furrowed. Your hands were shaking. “I-I’m sorry!” You called out, and he scowled. 
“You nearly hit me!” He almost-yelled back. But taking a look at your face his expression softened. Against better judgement, you slid down the pipe, feet landing on the ground with an oof.
He looked at you, eyebrows raised. Someone in the undercity coming down to personally apologise for something like that instead of laughing in one’s face and running away was rare. He looked at the apologetic look on your face, and watched as you opened your mouth to speak while also stretching out your hand.
“I’m sorry…”
He reached for your hand too, ready to dismissively accept your apology and move on with his night.
“…But can I have a cigarette?”
His expression dropped.
You lazily took the cigarette from his hands and took a long, deep drag, tendrils of smoke curling from your mouth. At his frown, you moved it from your lips to speak.
“What? You don’t have herpes, do you? I’m not going to get it, am I?”
Wordlessly, he shook his head. You studied his face. Strong features, blue-green eyes. He wasn’t half bad looking.
I wouldn’t mind getting an STD from him.
Without a single reaction to your rather graphic thought you took another drag on the cigarette, before handing it back to him. “Thanks. Not everyone here knows that sharing is caring.”
He laughs, guarded, and then stops himself, surprised such a sound even came out at your words. You smiled at him sweetly. “And sorry for almost hitting your head and bashing it in with a tile. Though it wasn’t my fault, was it?”
“I suppose it was an accident,” he said stiffly, a strand of hair falling in front of his face. He dropped the cigarette, crushing it under his heel. “Miss…”
“[name]. Janna, I really needed to calm my nerves.” You stretched, arching your back like a cat, feeling the bones pop and muscles stretch deliciously. The man wet his lips, looking out at the street through the alley.
“And why would that be?” His voice was smooth. You readjusted your shawl. 
“Some enforcers were chasing me. The usual.” You let out a slow sigh, going to leave the alley without as much as a goodbye. He didn’t say anything, just watched you leave.
You planted a foot out into the street.
“That’s her!” 
You whipped your head around, watching a gaggle enforcers charging towards you. A scream tore from your lips you rushed back into the alleyway. The man grabbed you as you almost crashed into his chest.
“Fucking run!”
Shimmying up the pipe, you were back on the roof. You didn’t spare a turn to look back as your heavy lunges rattled the roofs, leaping over bars and gaps. You turned and saw an enforcer slip through a gap in the roofs, crashing into the street below. The man from the alley was just at your shoulder. Without a sparing a second you turned and left.
Once you were certain you’d lost the enforcers you stopped, chest heaving, and slumped onto the ground- roof- beneath you. The man stayed standing, eyeing you with an unreadable expression.
“Okay,” you gasped, turning over. “Now I’m actually sorry.” Coughing while trying to catch your breath you extended a hand. “Do you have water or something? I’m sorry.”
He let out a heavy sigh, not knowing how to behave in this situation as he took out a flask, crouching down and holding it out to you as you continuously mumbled apologies. You gulped down the water inside. “It isn’t poisoned, is it?” You sighed, wiping your mouth as you handed it back. He sat down as he took it, joining you on the slanted roof. 
“You only think to ask that after you’ve downed half the thing?” His voice was filled with amusement. You ignored him.
“I’m sorry, mister…”
“Silco.”
You stared at him as he took out another cigarette, patting his pockets for a lighter. Without a word you took one out, flicking it open and pushing down to activate the flame. You held it in front of his face. “I’m sorry, Silco.”
The cigarette lit up. You studied his profile, mainly the line of his sharp nose as he inhaled deeply.
“It’s fine. Why do you keep apologizing?”
“I got you involved in a chase with enforcers after almost dropping a tile on your head and taking your cigarette.”
“You didn’t have to take the cigarette,” he muttered, miffed. You ignored him, the lighter snapping shut. “And my plans for the night have been ruined…”
“I’m sorry,” you repeated. He looked at you, chuckling. “I’ll make it up to you somehow, if you want.”
He raised an eyebrow. “Such generosity is rare.”
“Not generosity. Justice.”
He laughed again, at your dramatics this time as he rolled the cigarette in between his long fingers. “Right. Justice.”
“So, one favour.”
“That’s a dangerous offer, [name].” A thought struck him, and he furrowed his brow. “Don’t tell me you’re from topside.”
You stared at him for a minute, then scoffed. “Of course I’m not. What makes you think that?”
“Your naivety.” He blew smoke from his lungs, and you watched as it curled over the rooftops. “It’s not a good idea to go around offering favours to strangers.”
“I’m as much of a trencher as you are, Silco,” you scoffed.
At this, he suddenly grabbed your wrist. You stared at him in shock as his lip curled, expression furious. You blinked, unmoving. 
“Zaunite.”
“Wh-what?”
“Use Zaunite. Not the name they gave us.” His grip on your wrist loosened before falling away completely. You nodded.
“Right.”
It fell silent.
“And I’ll never cash in that favour.”
You tilted your head. “Why not?”
“Because, it’s a stupid idea. If anything, I’m doing you a favour.” Another drag. You turned over to look at the sky.
“Thanks… I guess?”
He chuckled again, smoke curling from in between his teeth. Your face felt warm. “You’re strange.”
“So I’ve been told. What exactly were the plans for your night that I so rudely ruined?”
He didn’t say anything.
“I hope you weren’t visiting a cathouse.”
He groaned, and you laughed, snatching the cigarette off of him. He didn’t stop you. “Certainly not. Not for the cats, at least.”
“The cats?”
“The women, [name].”
“Well, what else would you go there for?”
“You’d be surprised.”
You frown. “Right… so no prostitutes.”
“Definitely not. It’s an immoral practice.”
Your eyebrows shot up. “A trencher with morals. I see.”
“Zaunite,” he said through gritted teeth.
You shrugged, sucking on the cigarette. “Well, I don’t care. They’re just making a living.”
“And what would you consider immoral?”
You blew out a cloud of smoke, and for a moment you considered saying something that he’d agree with, racking your brains for an appropriate answer. He clearly hated topside…
“What those Pilties are doing. Their prejudice against us,” you said proudly. He gave a small laugh.
“Right. Everyone thinks that. Something unique, please.”
You stayed silent. “Well… I do believe capitalising on addiction is quite immoral.”
“Ironic, considering that cigarette you’re holding.”
“There are extremes.” Your voice was low, and it was clear there was a story behind the subject. He didn’t press you, simply watching you put out the cigarette on the tin roof, your appetite for nicotine crushed.
After a quiet moment you spoke. “My sister was pregnant. Some… drug lord got her hooked onto something.” You rested your head down. “It was dangerous. They don’t make it anymore.” He hummed silently. “I lost both her and the baby. And she was all I had left, so…”
“The father?”
You scoffed, and that told him more than he needed to know.
“That… drug… business owner… whatever he was- he didn’t need money. He was filthy rich,” you spat. “A-“ your eyes slid to Silco- “A Zaunite, hoarding money, sucking life out of his own people, and not sharing a single drop. I hate that bastard.”
“What became of him?”
“Business crushed, killed by enforcers.” Your response was curt.
He hummed. “Well, in that case, I certainly won’t go down that path.”
“…I suppose I won’t work in a brothel either.”
“Or own one,” he added. You laughed.
“Or own one.”
You sighed gently, standing up. “Well, I hope whatever business you missed gets resolved. Goodbye, Silco.” You made to climb down to the street.
“Wait-“
You looked up.
“You said you don’t have anyone. If you’re ever… looking for company, go to the Last Drop. Tell the bartender you’re looking for Silco.”
Your eyes enlarged as you stowed the name in your memory. “The Last Drop,” you repeated, then nodded.
“Goodbye, [name].” 
You smiled again, and dropped down into the crowd.
When you looked back up to the sky, to the roof, he was gone.
-
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kizzer55555 · 1 year ago
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The power of hotdogs
Danny is running to Gotham to escape the GIW. As he’s running into an alleyway, he crashes into non other than condiment king who proceeds to attack and hits the GIW goons behind him. This absolutely terrifies them due to the fact that their prestigious white clothes will be stained. The fact that he has people running in terror gives Condiment king a giddy feeling so he proceeds to chase them around Gotham.
Thus starts Danny’s constant exploits of running to condiment king when he’s being chased and the rogue scarring the living daylights out of the GIW. They develop nightmares and Condiment king starts developing new concoctions that will specifically stain clothes and never come out. Mwa ha ha!
Eventually, Danny gets adopted by the rogue and becomes his sidekick. Now, when people learned that condiment king got a new sidekick, they laughed. Who in their right mind would want to mentor under him. They believed that this was some poor sob who was down on their luck and truly desperate. That or some weirdo like the ‘king’ himself.
But they didn’t understand.
They didn’t understand that they should never have let Danny Fenton (known as Phantom) become Condiment King’s sidekick.
Danny knows how to animate hotdogs and other foods to create an army. Danny knows intimately about the secret nasty burger sauce that is capable of powerful explosions of you heat it up. Danny has knowledge in the usage and how to build various weaponry designed to shoot or even be powered by green sludge (which can easily be replaced by ketchup, mustard, or relish).
And he hasn’t even shown Gotham his power-set yet. No one knows why he calls himself phantom. For all they know, he’s just a normal (terrifying) human.
Everyone blames the GIW for this mess.
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fortunxa · 6 months ago
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Blue hair, blue eyes, blue lights
Jinx x fem!reader / modern AU
summary: The chances of a blue-haired girl being chased by the cops and hopping in my car, simply yelling “Drive!” are low, but never zero.
author’s note: It’s my first time publishing a Jinx one-shot of mine, I hope you enjoy! This is a relatively new blog, so if anyone wants to become mutuals I’m definitely open to the idea! :)
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Fourteen days.
A mere two weeks stand between me and move-in day for my freshman year of college. In other words, summer break is slowly coming to an end, and I’ve done fuck all to make it memorable.
I can feel life passing me by as I watch like a bystander. Usually, the clock is my enemy—a constant reminder of my youth running out, and, shit, I’m too young to feel that way. This time, it serves as a way to free me from the shackles of the evening shift as a front desk worker at our local gym.
The clock strikes midnight, and, like a modern-day Cinderella, I jump up from my seat and make a beeline for the exit, hurriedly clocking out. I simultaneously greet and say goodbye to the night shift going in, already halfway through the small yet relatively empty parking lot. The smell of sweaty ‘gym bros’ is long forgotten as the breeze engulfs me, my dirty sneakers thudding on the concrete. The rust on my beat-up jeep shines in the moonlight as I approach—so seductive, I snicker to myself. I toss my duffel bag in the trunk, hop behind the wheel, and start the engine. I take this moment to commence my connect-phone-to-car-or-die-trying mission and thank the universe for its successful outcome. I browse a bit through the plethora of playlists before settling on the usual one, the sound of Arctic Monkeys filling the space as I leave the parking lot.
I don’t want to go home—not yet, at least—so I settle for a late-night drive. The cookie-cutter, upper-class houses pass me by as I mindlessly cruise through the clean streets—a stark contrast to my neighborhood, where you either learn to stick up for yourself or go home crying to your mama. A place where there is more sewage sludge than trees. A place where I grew up and one I learned to love.
In the midst of it all, I don’t notice the particularly nasty bump on the road that makes my song abruptly cut off. I take a right, pulling over in an alley with an annoyed groan as I resort to phase two, also known as connect-phone-back-to-car-before-I-impulsively-crash, of my initial mission. As I fiddle with the settings, showing my inner cheek no mercy as my teeth dig into their feast, a hissing and spritzing sound comes through my open window.
I think I’m imagining things at first, that post-shift fatigue surely getting the best of me, but I spot the source of the sound rather quickly: a figure, hidden almost out of sight between the fancy houses, switching between various colors of spray paint as she defaces the picture-perfect facade with her graffiti. The sheer speed of her actions makes it look like she’s juggling.
How do I know it’s a girl? Well, although she is wearing a hat to shield her face from any surveillance cameras, a neck warmer up to her nose, and a black, oversized tracksuit already covered in pink paint splotches, her disguise was blown the moment she decided to leave her blue, ankle-length, twin braids out. I twist my neck and reach over the dashboard to try and get a better look at her work. I can barely make out the shape of a green monkey’s face before moving on to the next element. ‘Get ji-’
My reading is interrupted by the sound of sirens piercing the air and blue lights illuminating the area. Instinctively, I turn my headlights off and duck, watching the girl as she hastily packs the cans into her backpack. I swear I can see her eyes twinkle with excitement as she takes one last glance at her—presumably—finished artwork and takes off running through the gardens. Her faint giggle reaches my ears, and a bewildered smile graces my features. I wanted fun, and now it’s right in front of me. I definitely couldn’t get a clearer sign than this.
I observe as one of the cops chases after her as the other drives away, seemingly trying to cut her off. Lightbulb moment. I put the car into gear and waste no time following them from the comfort of the dark alleys, reaching the mysterious girl first through the shortcuts. I catch her contemplating her next move and, without hesitation, quickly flash my high beams at her twice. This seems to grab her attention, and I signal for her to get in with a simple nod, tapping the car door as confirmation.
To my surprise, she actually runs over and hops in the backseat, her back lying flat as she takes a swift peek through the window, and holy shit, I didn’t think that she actually would.
“Drive!” she yells through her panting, and I do. I feel my heart beating wildly against my ribcage as the blue lights appear once again in my rearview mirror. Don’t fuck this up, I think before taking a sharp left. I hear her elated squeals as I visualize the district’s roads and plan the perfect getaway.
Right.
Right, once again.
Left.
Straight down the street.
Sharp right.
I can hear the sirens getting closer as I speed through the familiar routes. It doesn’t matter that I know this area like the back of my hand; the cops probably do, too. There is only one thing left to try, and, albeit risky, it should work. They hadn’t spotted my car yet, and we were quickly approaching a busy intersection—the perfect distraction.
The tires squeak as I harshly pull into an empty driveway, turning the engine off in hopes of blending in.
“What the hell are you doing?!” the blue-haired girl grumbles with brooding eyes. I don’t reply. Instead, I shush her as I grab her waist and roll her off the seat, pushing her into the legroom before ducking underneath the steering wheel. We fall silent, holding our breaths in as the police car passes us by. I watch as they get lost in the dense traffic, a sigh of relief escaping me as I throw my head back. I climb into my seat again and take a peek at the tagger in the back, confusion crossing my features as I watch her stuff her face with candy. My candy. “Hefty stash you got back there.” Her mouth twists at the sour taste of a Warhead she picked. She seems completely unfazed by this whole situation.
I notice that she had discarded her hat and neck warmer and take the opportunity to get a better look at her: blue eyes matching her hair, light freckles splattered across her straight nose and rosy cheeks, pouty lips, her dark and expressive brows… She truly is breathtaking. I feel a blush creep up my face as she climbs over the console, wiggling her way into the passenger seat. She takes her hoodie off, revealing her black tank top, and fuck me, she has tattoos.
She faces me with a curious look herself, seemingly analyzing me too. Her gaze is difficult to decipher as her eyes trail over my figure, and I stiffen. She shoots me a knowing smile before throwing her hands around my neck and placing a kiss on my cheek. “You’re a lifesaver, toots,” she muses into my ear. The pleasant smell of paint and bubble gum hits my nose making me lick my lips. “Name’s Jinx, by the way. Stands for Jinx,” she cackles to herself, drawing her lower lip between her teeth awaiting my introduction.
I blink a couple of times, realizing how silent I’ve been throughout this whole ordeal. I can get awkward, sure, but I’m not timid, so I muster up the courage and consciously relax, trying to project a nonchalant attitude. “I’m Y/N.” I shoot her a smile of my own.
“Y/N. Hmm…” Jinx gives an approving hum as she repeats after me, my name rolling off her tongue like honey. “What made you help little ol’ me?” New observation: she’s a teaser.
“I need some excitement in my life,” I answer truthfully and she perks up with a spark in her eyes.
“Toots, you’ve just made friends with the perfect candidate to help you with that.” Her giddy attitude returns as she beams at me.
“We’re friends, huh?” I tease at her choice of words, my eyebrows raised in a cocky manner.
“Sure we are! I feel like running from the cops together is the perfect bonding experience, don’t ya?” She gives me a once-over before her mouth curves into a smirk. “Unless you want to be more than friends. That could work, too.” She winks. Her straightforwardness should make me turn crimson, but instead, it makes my confidence grow. I give a low chuckle as I shake my head in disbelief.
“Tell you what,” I begin, starting the engine and trying to connect my phone back to the car for the third time already, “let me get you home safely, and we’ll see what tomorrow brings to our friendship. Deal?” I extend my hand toward her, and she ponders my proposition. I can practically see the cogs turning in her head, her facial expressions jumping from sour to doubtful, as if she were battling her thoughts before settling on a satisfied grin.
Her soft hand reaches mine in a princess handshake, and I try not to look at her manicured nails for too long. “Deal.” The blue-haired girl snatches the phone out of my hands, adding her number to my contact list and sending a quick text to herself. Just when I think she’s giving it back, she picks a song, and I hear Arabella playing through the speakers. How fitting.
As I leave the stranger’s driveway, I sense her shuffling in the passenger seat, throwing her legs out the window. She puts her head on my lap freely, toying with the colorful charms on my keychain. In the spur of the moment, I gingerly brush her bangs behind her ear, revealing her side profile. Her gaze catches mine, and I see her eyes soften before I turn mine on the road again.
Jinx tells me her address, and I realize how close to me she lives—the perfect circumstances. I feel her lightly bobbing her head to the music as her left cheek strokes my thigh, her fingers tracing mine as they sit on the gear stick. Her demeanor feels different from the badass tagger who willingly hopped in a stranger’s car. She looks peaceful and content now.
My shoulders slump in disappointment as I park outside her house. She clicks her tongue and lazily lifts her head from the comfort of my lap. She looks around the empty streets of her neighborhood and hums, her curious eyes now shifting to mine. As we take each other in, I can’t help but gravitate toward her—her presence feels almost intoxicating, and I don’t want to part ways just yet. To my surprise, she copies my actions. She’s so close I can feel her minty breath mingle with mine. Instinctively, my gaze drops to her lips as she tentatively licks them. I let out a faint sigh, and she slowly closes the distance. I can hear my heartbeat as I wait for our lips to meet.
But they never do. “I don’t kiss on a first date,” she murmurs in my ear, and my face flushes. Jinx pulls away as she flashes me a toothy grin, and before I can even react, she’s already skipping to her front door, slinging her backpack over her shoulder. Wha-? When did she grab her stuff? I stare in disbelief as she turns around, her braids flailing behind her. “Let’s see what tomorrow brings,” she teases and blows me a kiss before disappearing into the dark hallway of her home.
Fourteen days.
Give me two weeks to make her mine.
╰┈➤ sequel – ‘Fourteen days’
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vaaaaaiolet · 5 days ago
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Your seasonally available secret-agent roommate got too into the holiday punch this year, and he's bursting with a secret you're not too keen on coming to terms with.
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secret santa fic for @crsssie!! roommates + mistletoe + one serving of cuddling <3
HUGE thank you for setting up Leon Secret Santa 2024 and a HUGER apology for messing up the time 😭 i love you LOADS cressie and i hope this fic has banter that lives up to the wonderful dialogue in your fics <3 MERRY CHRISTMAS!!
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gn / m, romance, fluff, BANTER, leon is SO BAD at feelings, roommates au, angst / slight miscommunication trope + drunken confessions, close your eyes and ignore canon for me <3 no mention of pronouns but reader has bobby pins in their hair cw: alcohol / drunkenness
word count: 1.5k // read on ao3
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“Shit, I didn’t-”
“Open your eyes, Leon! You’re going to fall, just hold on to me, we’re almost-”
“...don’t need you to,” he slurs, “I got it!”
Leon, of course, has got nothing at all besides shitfaced drunk. Your key is currently deciding not to fit into the convoluted lock he’d decided was absolutely necessary for your shared apartment. It was something about you having the fighting talent of a bedbound sloth (completely subjective opinion, you’d argued) and him being out of the country every few weeks.
The snow must’ve frozen it over while you two were out tonight, and between shouldering 165 pounds of muscle mass while manifesting a bobby pin into existence from your now-bedraggled hairdo to work into the keyhole, the start of Christmas Day is starting to look like Mission Impossible. 
“Don’t make this harder for me,” you plead to both your problems. 
The lock seems to be the only one to listen. Please, please – yes! The mahogany door to the apartment swings open, and you shoulder in your precious cargo, tracking snow all over the floor that’s sure to melt into sludge come morning. Luckily, the chore chart’s on your side tomorrow: Leon’s due for mopping. 
Once he wakes up from his alcohol induced nap, that is. And then you’ll have your fun. 
You deposit him on the couch faster than your paycheck, and your lungs inflate three sizes once his back makes contact with the cushions. “God, you’re heavy,” you pant, wiping your forehead.
“‘Cause you don’t go to the gym with me. Gotta get stronger.”
“I’ll quit my job and get buff once you start paying more than a third of the rent, yeah?”
Leon snorts. “‘m only here a third of the time anyway,” he says under his breath. 
He’s right, of course. The rent split was your idea, fair and square. But you pretend he isn’t. Pretend that it doesn’t hurt, either, like his punches when he tries to teach you self-defense whenever he’s free.
A cherub ornament must’ve fallen from the Christmas tree in the kitchen and crashed on your couch. Frosty blue eyes flutter open to gaze up at you from the cushions. There’s roses in Leon’s pale cheeks, flushed from the outdoors combined with him drinking his head off tonight, and when a wistful, angelic expression spreads across his face, you wish the snowstorm outside would’ve frozen over your heart instead of the door lock. 
He crooks a finger at you. Whispers like it hurts him, “Got somethin’ to tell ya.”
Your breath hitches. “Yeah?”
“‘s goddamn freezing in here.”
Unbelievable. You throw a couch cushion at his chest and he has the nerve to giggle while you stomp away to shut the front door. “You shouldn’t have gotten so drunk, Leon, what were you thinking?” you scold the subzero air. 
“I can handle my drinks!” he shouts back.
“Then why are you passed out on my couch?”
And despite having your back to him almost ten feet away, you can practically hear his brow scrunch at your words. “Thought it was our couch.”
You wave a flippant hand. “You know what I mean.”
“But you’re right,” he barks out a laugh. “Should be yours. All of it, I…I shouldn’t be here.”
He might be the one drunk tonight, but you’re the one feeling that telltale nausea all of a sudden. Leon’s laugh never makes your stomach roil like this. Screw all the little catches and springs – you twist the biggest one on the door’s lock closed and power walk back to the living room, taking a kneel on the couch next to Leon’s head. He’s turned to the other side now, broad back facing you. Tit for tat. 
“What are you talking about?” Digging your fingers into his right delt, you pry him back to look him in the eye, barely keeping the alarm out of your voice. 
“Uh, coins. Lotsa coins in the couch.” Leon fishes out a dime, shoots you a plastic excuse of a smile like you were born yesterday, “Yours?”
You shake his shoulder. “Don’t play dumb with me, come on. What did you say about you not being here?” 
“Mistletoe too, so much stuff in here…” 
You don’t even spare it a second glance, snatching the sprig out of his fingers. “What’s going on?” you ask, voice trembling. 
Because truth be told, security obsession and his pain-in-the-ass work schedule besides, you really can’t imagine living with anyone else. 
It’s been a year with Leon, your mysterious government agent roommate, the one who you’d spent nights hunched over the kitchen counter with corner store ramen. You’d gripe over your shitty coworkers, he’d threaten to tear them each a new one, and you’d half-pretend to beg him not to. And then you’d both couch surf until the sunrise, with you ending up cuddling into his chest and magically tucked into bed the next morning with your share of the chores done before Leon left for the day.
Leon’s shoulder was always there for you to cry on after failed first dates. It was the one favor you couldn’t pay back in kind; the man seemed to have zero interest in dating with a curious tendency to grow quiet whenever the question got brought up. But for him, you kept your first aid kit stocked. You’ve lost count of how many times you’d stayed up past two AM cleaning his cuts and icing his bruises upon his return home. 
It was a shared agreement. He kept his secrets, you got a built-in best friend. Or at least you thought you did before now.
Your throat stings. “Is this why you drank so much? You didn’t have the guts to tell me you hate living together?” You crumple the hem of his sweater in your fist.
The faraway look in Leon’s eyes clears instantaneously once he registers what’s starting to spill down your cheeks. 
Your next demand comes out riddled with cracks. “You have to be h-honest, Leon, promise me. Why don’t you want to stay?”
“Then you’ll stop crying?” 
Leon’s hands clumsily drift up to cup your cheeks, but the world’s gone full snowglobe through your haze of tears. You don’t pay them any mind, nodding fervently. 
“It’s you,” he breathes. 
You smell the mulled wine in his breath. Your holiday once-favorite, sweet and and now sickening. You’re a bruised peach, frostbitten and smashed under his Timberlands. Leon had it all wrong; it wasn’t the front door that needed to be padlocked, it was your stupid heart and the creeping realization that you’d tried to stave off with all those horrible dates and more excuses to fall asleep in his arms. 
The thing Leon did get right, though, was that you had no fighting chance. How could you let him break his way so completely into your life? He wasn’t even here half the time and here you are, fighting the clock to greet him home like he even wanted you there. 
You shake your head, interrupting the thumbs trying to wipe away your tears. “That’s fine. Yeah. Totally fine,” you sniffle, putting on your customer service brave face.
“No,” Leon frowns. 
“If I’m such a horrible roommate, we can sto-”
“No,” he repeats firmly. “Don’t…ugh,” he claps a hand to his forehead, the alcohol headache hot on his heels. 
“Don’t what?” you cry.
“Not helping,” Leon grits.
“Sorry for being sad that I’ll miss my best friend? I don’t know what you want me to-”
There’s a sharp pull on your wrist. With an exasperated sigh, Leon lifts the fist at your side with the sprig of mistletoe still in it above your head. You get one, maybe two seconds to wonder how he remembered it was there before his lips collide with yours, his calloused palm guiding your cheek towards his cherry-flavored mouth. The wind knocks out of you – more than that time you dared him to throw you over his shoulder.
The mistletoe falls out of your fingers. Leon’s thumb brushes the last tear out of the corner of your eye and mulled wine becomes your favorite again.
“Didn’t have the guts to say I liked ya,” he mumbles, and your heart skips. Leon’s smiling. 
“You’d rather move out than admit you like me?” you tease, breathless, arms circling around his neck the way they always do when he princess carries you. 
“Sweetheart, y’know me.”
And yeah, you do. Nobody else does quite like you.
“Stupid.” You let him kiss you a moment more before pulling away; you can’t help that his frowny face is your favorite expression on him when he’s drunk. “And you know what happens when you pull stupid stunts like that?”
Leon blinks at you, the consequences of bad backflipping flashing through his head. “Don’t want plunger duty!” he groans, flopping back onto the couch.
He’ll be wishing the toilet rats a Merry Christmas, poor guy. Your guy. You’ll just have to wait to cuddle him after he takes an hour-long shower.
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@leonsecretsanta MERRY CHRISTMAS Y'ALL!! link to my masterlist lol
dividers by @/strangergraphics!
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ameliathornromance · 14 days ago
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The house you had been living in had seriously dilapidated after your parents had died.
Since you had little to no help, living far out and away from the nearest village – which was just under five miles walk – there wasn’t a lot you could do in the first place.
So you’d let the broken tiles on your roof, be broken and when rain came, let the water leak into your room and drip, drip with the tone of a metronome. You’d let the walls foundations crack and climb up to the ceilings of your house and let the doors hinges to each room in the house rust and stiffen open so that you could no longer close nor open them.
While you had tried to fix the problems yourself initially, they proved a lot more difficult than you would have thought.
The door hinges would not budge from the wooden thresholds, no matter how hard you tried to unscrew them, when you tried to re-plaster the walls, the thick cement smelling sludge would either become watery and the cracks reappear, or the mixture was just too thick and would take whole chunks of the wall with it, as it crashed onto your now rotting wooden floorboards.
Needless to say, you were not in the best spot. The only room that didn’t seem to be effected by the house falling apart, was the kitchen. All the cabinets worked, the sink still delivered clean water and the fire pit for cooking hadn’t failed you once.
One day, a hankering for blueberry pie got the better of you. You hadn’t made one since your parents had died and figured it would do you some good to get out of the house and then come back to make a deliciously sweet treat.
And so you’d set out into the forest, wicker basket hanging off the crook of your arm and waiting to be filled.
Once you had found the blueberry bushes deep within the forest, you began to pick and completely forgot about your surroundings. You don’t know how long you must have been there, for all you knew it could have been hours.
It wasn’t until the trees became still and the birds twittering and chittering had been silenced that you were brought out of your meditative state. Living in the woods for a long time, you get used to the sound of wildlife.
It isn’t until that wildlife goes silent that you realize when you’re in danger.
Confirming your suspicions, a low grumbled reverberated in your chest, the hairs on your neck standing on end.
You turned from your spot by the blueberry bushes and watched as a pack of wolves surrounded you, their teeth bared, hackles raised, their backs dipped as they readied their attack.
Eyes darting around, you searched for an escape route. It’s not like you could dart between them, they’d rip you apart like a chew toy.
Jumping over the bushes was a no go as well, the moment you’re in the air, they would strike and then you’d really be in trouble.
With the wicker basket still squeezed between your elbow, you instinctively gripped it as you realised that this situation was as helpless as it looked.
This was it. You were going to die here.
Just as your thought had finished, the wolf central to your vision let out a bark and lunged, spring boarding off it’s back paws, jaws open and aiming straight for your neck.
You squeezed your eyes tightly closed, threw your arms up to protect yourself, braced yourself for the feeling of teeth ripping at your flesh, the feeling of your warm blood spilling down your front.
But instead, the wolf gave a yelp, followed by a whimper.
You squinted open your eyes, ready to shut them again at the first sign of danger.
A wall of green, thick muscle stood in front of you, the pack leader clasped in this monster’s hands.
“Back!” He snarled. And as if he were throwing a baseball, he threw the creature to the ground.
As soon as the wolf had hit the ground, it had scrambled up, still whimpering. It scuttled away, pack following after it with their tails between their legs.
Heart in your throat, chest thumping like a drum, you looked up at your saviour.
It was an Orc.
Exactly as described by your parents as a child: Tall, walls of muscle with green skin that pulled taught over the strong flesh of their body.
Long, yellow tusks that jutted out from its bottom jaws as it turned to face you. It’s long dark hair had been tied into a low pony tail that swayed with his massive figure as he grunted at you, “are you alright?”
Still reeling from the wolf encounter, you nodded, words escaping you.
“Do you live nearby?” He asked.
You nodded again. His steel cold eyes examined you for a moment, completely enrapturing you.
“Come, let me walk you home.” He placed a hand between your shoulder blades and began to guide you away from the scene of the battle from the wolves.
“Oh?” You said, surprised. “O-Okay.”
The pair of you walked back in silence as you processed what had just happened; Where had this Orc come from?
You hadn’t heard him when you were sat there picking the berries – which were surprisingly intact, despite your reaction to block the wolf.
Without even realising it, you had led him back to your house. Absently, you said, “thank you. For saving me from the wolves.”
The Orc whose steely scowl had not faded during your walk, gave a curt nod and then looked over his shoulder. “I should be getting back to the camp now.” He said. “The others will wonder where I have gone.”
He went to turn and walk away, but you grabbed his hand, “w-wait!”
The Orc looked over his shoulder at you, eyebrows furrowed in confusion.
“I can’t just let you go without thanking you properly.” You said. “I was going to make blueberry pie, if you’d like some.”
The Orc seemed sceptical for a moment, looking at you as if you might have been mad for asking him to come in.
“Are you certain?” He asked. “What of your family?”
Biting your lip, you shook your head. “Don’t worry about them. They won’t mind.”
After another sceptical look from you, the Orc shrugged. “Alright. Just a slice.”
Relief washed over you, before your face went scarlet.
Your hand shot away from the Orc’s hand, “s-sorry.”
The Orc gave another shrug and the pair of you made your way inside your home.
Upon stepping back into the place, your heart sank as you remembered the disrepair it was in. “I’m sorry about the mess.” You said, holding the front door open for him. “It’s not very easy for me to do all the repairs on my own and I don’t think anyone will come out to help me fix it. The kitchen is fine though!” You gave a nervous smile.
The Orc paid no mind to your hurried explanations as he looked around your front room, at the unlit fireplace, your sofa and lack of other decorations. “You live here?” He asked.
“Yeah…” you trailed off. Not wanting to make this anymore awkward than it already was, you rushed to the kitchen. “Do Orcs drink coffee? Or tea?”
The rest of the afternoon was spent in the kitchen, your rescuer sat at your comparably tiny table, with a smaller mug of coffee in hand, watching you as you went through the motions of making a pie.
A part of you couldn’t quite believe what you were doing. Making a pie for an Orc? A blood thirsty brute who would happily eat you whole?
When the pie was finally done, you placed a slice in front of the Orc who had taken to admiring some embroidery your mother had done while she was still alive.
Upon seeing the slice in front of him, he picked up your plate and scrutinised it from all angles, as if he was a star chef looking for mistakes in an amateurs work.
You watched with baited breath as the Orc picked up a fork and shovelled a portion of the pie into his mouth.
After a moment, he hmphed and downed the rest of the slice in a flash. “This is good!” He said, flashing you a wide grin. “Another slice!”
Taken aback – but nevertheless glad – you cut out another slice and gave it to the Orc. After five or six more slices, the Orc rested an elbow on the table and pointed at you, “how are you not working somewhere like a bakery, hm? You’d make a killing!”
You chuckled abashedly. “I don’t know… I’ve just had to keep an eye on this place, make sure it doesn’t fall apart.”
The Orc took one last glance around the kitchen and then back at you. “I’ll tell you what, blueberry lady.” He said, his thick calloused finger still pointed at you. “You keep making this kind of food and I will help fix up your awful house.”
Your eyes widened. Was this Orc really offering to help?
“But, what about your camp?” You asked, concerned. “Won’t they get worried about you?”
“Bah!” He waved you away, “they’ll be fine without me for a while.” And with that same, toothy grin, he stood and rubbed his hands together. “Now, show me the main problem first and we will tackle that tomorrow morning!”
And true to his word, he had. After sleeping on the sofa, you had shown him the problem on your roof, with the water dripping into your room and he had simply waved it off once again. “Easy problem.” He said, stepping outside into the front garden.
“I didn’t realise Orcs were so handy,” you told him as he walked around the back of your house.
“We are good problem solvers.” He said, smiling. “We have to be, as we are constantly on the road and being chased around by Humans. We think quick on our feet.”
After finding a ladder and some spare tiles hidden away in the back of your shed, the pair of you set to work. By the end of the day, the tile had been fixed and by the end of the next, the cracks in your walls had been properly plastered over.
You weren’t going to lie, you were growing fond of this Orc. His initial cold demeanour seemed to have fallen away and was replaced by this jovial energy that was just infectious.
Everyday, instead of waking up and dreading the day to come, you felt excited to see him and greet him with a cheerful smile, before the pair of you started working on your next DIY project for the day.
It was nice to have someone to talk to again, to eat the food you cooked and to laugh with.
You hadn’t realised how much you’d missed talking to someone.
Unfortunately, the day finally came where everything had been fixed and the house looked as if it had never been damaged in the first place.
It was then that you realised, that this would be the day you two would part. For the past couple of weeks, your new friend had been talking about returning to his camp, which he was sure had now moved far ahead of him now.
“It’s normal for them to leave some Orcs behind,” he had explained when you expressed concern for him, “they always leave signs that only other Orcs can see so we can catch up. They are not so heartless.”
The night before his departure, he had told you, “to thank you for the great food, let me take you to a Tavern I go to sometimes on this route. They do a good beer there.”
When you had tried to tell him that there was no need for something like that, that he had done more than enough, he had dismissed your words, “this will be the last night we see each other! Let it be a fun one!”
When he’d said that you had completely ceased all objections.
The next evening, the pair of you set off on the trek to the village. As you both laughed and chatted, you realised that when he left, there would be no one else to do this with.
After all, it’s not like you were friends with anyone in the village and most people would give you strange looks if you just decided to insert yourself into their conversations.
When you both reached the Tavern, your Orc friend ordered two pints of beer and set one in front of you with a massive thunk.
“I’m really going to miss you.” You said, as you watched your Orc down his whole pint in one go.
You decided to sit at a booth in the corner of the Tavern, hidden away from prying eyes.
“And I will miss you too,” the Orc replied, sad smile spreading across his lips. He ran an arm across his face, wiping away the foam and signalled the barman to get him another drink. “It’s rare that I get to enjoy the company of a woman like you. Normally, they run away from me rather than invite me into their home.”
“Well, you did save me from a pack of wolves. I had to do something to thank you.”
Soon, that second pint of beer was gone too, while you were still on your first. You sipped at your beer apprehensively as the Orc beside you finally got his hands on what was now his fifth pint.
“Um…” you pursed your lips nervously. The Orc’s face had began to turn slightly pink. “I think you’re going a bit over board there.”
“Nonsense!” The Orc next to you slurred, jousting his glass pint at you with a wobble. “Orcs can handle a hell of a lot more beer than any human can! I mean,” he pointed at the pint in your hands. “Look at you, you’re not even finished with your first one.”
Your Orc friend hiccupped and held a fist up to his mouth, as if he was going to belch. After a moment, he placed his forehead on the edge of the table in front of him and heaved a sigh.
“Maybe you’ve had one too many?” You asked. Carefully, you removed the Orcs thick calloused fingers from his pint glass and slid it across to the other side of the table. “You wouldn’t want to get a hangover tomorrow would you? You won’t be able to go back to your camp otherwise.”
The Orc grumbled something next to you, forehead still firmly planted on the table.
“Sorry?” You asked.
The Orc looked up, resting his chin on the table edge and repeated, “I don’t want to go,” his cheeks had gone from a slight pink to a dusting of red, “I like staying with you.”
Your heart caught in your throat as he continued, “you’re kind and sweet and pretty,” he smiled at you as a free hand reached out to your face and caught a lock of hair hanging from beside your face.
He twirled it around his finger, before replacing his forehead down on the wooden ledge. “And I don’t want to leave you alone, no woman should live alone in a world where wolves will attack you.”
Your eyebrows shot up. “I don’t want you to go either.” You said, quickly.
The Orc beside you looked up at you, eyes wide in surprise. “R-Really?”
“Yes! I don’t want to be alone again! Spending time with you has been the first time in a very long time that I’ve been happy!” You admitted. Tears welled up in your eyes as you continued, “I don’t want you to go because...” you swallowed the lump in your throat, “I really like you!”
The Orc stared at you for a moment, stunned by your words. “Y-You mean it?” He sat up straight, apparently completely sober since the fifth pint.
You wiped your tears and nodded.
The Orc fell silent for a moment as if in contemplation before he clapped his hands together. “I’ve got the perfect idea. You should come with me.”
“Go with you? But what about the house?” You asked.
“It was falling apart anyway!” He said, “And we did our best to repair it, so it’s not like it’s going to collapse any time soon. We can go back to it any time, it could be like a holiday home. My camp comes through here and when we need a pit stop, we can just put up in there for a little while!”
Hope soared in your chest, “you mean it? I can really go with you?”
“I wouldn’t have it any other way.” The Orc stood up from his seat, swaying slightly. “Come! We should head back home and pack your things! We will have a long journey tomorrow.”
And with that, the two of you made your way out of the Tavern and back to the house.
“I’m so glad you’re coming with me, I don’t know if I could bare being away from you, blueberry lady.”
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