#cracker eee

[brandonaguja]

Voting ends January 17th

[offda-rails-art]

Here it is! Hope you like Red ;) because this story is all about him. Also I’m not illustrating writing anymore it’s too much with how much dialogue I want to shove in there.

Old Red has done many years of service to the railway of Hennessy. As you could imagine the feisty old soul had built up a reputation of being a fierce and nasty engine who feared no man or beast. With this reputation, Old Red was given dangerous tasks to do. These tasks would be traveling to the outskirts of Hennessy (no mans land) where all kinds of outlaws roamed and robbed just about any living thing they came across. However any outlaw knew to not mess with Red, or they’d meet a terrible end. Old Red would bring important cargo across no mans land with ease. He’d carry precious and expensive valuables, and no outlaw would dare try and steal anything from his cars. A few tried but would always end up unlucky.

Something unexpected happened one day on the job for Old Red, as the engine puffed down the tracks and into no mans land a big new group of outlaws came charging up from a ditch nearby the tracks. Guns blazing, spurs jingling, and hollering left and right they caught right up to the big red engine. Old Red snorted and got ready to put up a good fight.

Old Red billowed out thick black smoke, he snarled and bared what was left of his sharp crooked teeth. His loud bell and whistle shrieked and rang horribly. Suddenly he gasped, he got short of steam and his whistle cut out. Old Red felt himself lock up almost instantly. A woman on a big white horse kept up right next to him. She stood up in her saddle while her pony galloped along, her gun pointed right at him she meant business. But he didn’t stop because of that, he stopped because he was absolutely taken away by her. This had to be the most beautiful regal woman he had ever laid his eyes on. He needed a closer look at her. Before he knew it while he had stopped to gawk at this lady, the outlaws had already broken into his cargo and raided just about what they could fit in their pockets and saddle bags. That was the first time Red had been robbed.

That night when Old Red crept back to the roundhouse everyone of course was surprised about what had happened to the ornery engine. Cracker Jack had overheard Red’s engineer explain what he thought had happened. The engineer spoke to Cracker Jack’s and a group of other men. They all found it odd that Red stopped so suddenly and acted so differently. As soon as Cracker Jack heard the mention of a female outlaw riding up along next to the ornery old engine he smirked. The little diesel teased Red to no end all night. Cracker Jack laughed and made kissy faces to Red, “I bet you’d like that! How funny! Old Reddie gawking at a pretty girl! The big old engines gone soft! For a human at that!” He sneered. Red huffed his cheeks blushed.

“You best sleep with one eye open tonight! No one interests me! Certainly not a no good criminal!” Red huffed but his face only glowed brighter with embarrassment. Cracker Jack laughed and laughed and didn’t stop with his teasing until morning.

A few weeks later it happened again. The same outlaw group caught up with Old Red when he carried expensive cargo across no mans land. The group seemed to notice that the big red devil took a liking to a certain group member. They sent their lady up and sure enough Red stopped immediately. This time she stayed there with him. Old Red looked closer at her and his face went as bright as his paint work. “Hello iron hoss” the lady smiled seeing him looking at her bashfully. Red couldn’t find words he stuttered but finally managed to get out,

“What’s... er... what’s your name?” He stuttered.

“I don’t tell anyone that, but because you’ve been such a peach I guess I’ll tell ya. It’s Faline.” She grinned seeing his one good eye glow. Old Red tripped over his words again trying to tell her it was such a beautiful name for a gorgeous woman. She laughed “oh your a real charmer iron hoss.” She blew him a kiss before galloping off with her band of fellow outlaws. Once again Red was robbed. But he could care less, he nearly fell on his side after she had blown him a kiss.

Weeks had passed and Red made more trips into no mans land, each time he anticipated seeing Faline but unfortunately he didn’t. He grew a bit depressed and his heart sank when he looked over to a field to see what he thought was her horse grazing by itself. Word had gotten around that a few outlaws from the band that stole from him had been caught and jailed. Old Reds engineer had told him the good news but Red didn’t find it good at all. The old engine stayed quiet most of the time and didn’t show off his ornery attitude. One night as if by a miracle, Old Red had to wait at one of Hennessy’s main stations. Red never went that way and didn’t usually stop at passenger stations anyways. It was late and night and hardly anyone was around, only a few passengers waited for their night train to arrive. Old Red watched curiously as a fancily dressed passenger approached him. He went red realizing who it was. She laughed “I didn’t forget about you iron hoss, you’ve been a real doll. I joined those men because I needed money and had no way of getting it. I know it’s wrong to rob and take but my family has no other way of getting the money. Because of you, my two sick boys can get what they need and I can’t thank you enough.” She leaned in and kissed his blushing cheeks, before hurrying away as her train arrived. Old Red sighed watching her disappear. She was certainly someone he’d never forget.

End.

[somescenecatholic]

I WENT TO THE ASIAN STORE AAAA

I GOT REGULAR DORAYAKI, DORAEMON DORAYAKI, CHOCOBI, DORAEMON CRACKERS, AND DANGO AAAAA

ME AND MY BROTHER ARE SO HAPPY RN EEE AHDBCJBFJCBCJCJCJC

THE DORAEMON DORAYAKI HAS A STICKER!!!! BANDNDNDJCNFNFJDJJD

EEEE X333333

*happy scene kid noizez*

[osc-confessions]

The fact that the two trans characters in EEE, Cracker and Headset, both feel like fortnite kids, is actually extremely funny to me

-🍅

fortnite is making all the kids trans these days

[fanficsandfluff]

A New Miracle - Chapter 12

A/N: The date has arrived!

Fandom: Encanto

Character(s): OC (Original Character) Alexa, Bruno Madrigal, Julieta Madrigal, Pepa Madrigal, Mirabel Madrigal, the rest of the Madrigal family

Being in the Madrigal house for a good amount of time by now, Alexa had learned some traditions and usual happenings within the house and with its denizens. One thing she still wasn't used to was that none of the women wore pants. Her own very limited clothing selection turned into her having to borrow clothing from Pepa or Julieta while Alexa and Mirabel were working on sewing her new clothes. And it turned out that Alexa started wearing more skirts and dresses than ever in her life. However, she just sewed her first pair of comfy pants with Mirabel and tried them on and loved how they felt and fit.

"Nice! This will be perfect for today," Alexa said happily as she slipped back out of them to make the remaining adjustments with Mirabel's help.

"Why? What's happening today?"

"Your uncle is going to show me his telenovelas."

"Oh," Mirabel said but then immediately laughed.

"Whahat?"

"Nothing! You're gonna love them. Dolores was telling me about some of the plotlines she heard when Tío Bruno was in the walls and they sound very gripping."

"Oh okay. Mmhm... I think you're secretly telling me to be prepared," she nudged Mirabel's shoulder with her own before sliding aside to watch Mirabel clean up the hems of her new pants.

"Ooooh, you should bring some snacks," Mirabel added, "He likes hard candies."

"Like an old man?"

"He is an old man."

Alexa snorted at that, "Okahay. I'll bring some crackers and hard candies. A lovely snack."

Mirabel cleaned up Alexa's pants and finished officially just before lunchtime. Bruno wasn't at breakfast with them, which made Alexa worry that he was too nervous for their 'date.' Maybe she shouldn't have made it official like that and scared him off. Alexa grabbed some leftover pastries and fruits from breakfast to bring for him as well as those crackers and candies Mirabel mentioned. Then she waited outside Mirabel's room when it was after lunch. She skipped lunch because she herself was getting nervous... hypocrite maybe... but she also didn't think Bruno showed up for that meal either. He rarely seemed to eat with the family, now that she thought about it.

Alexa saw Bruno coming down the hallway towards her and she smiled, "Hi. Nice to see you," she greeted as if they literally don't live in the same home.

"Hey," Bruno said back and he skirted around her, continuing to move, "Let's get this show on the road."

Alexa smiled at the statement and followed him not in the direction of his room. He stopped at the painting on the hallway wall and pulled it open to reveal that same hole in the wall.

"We're going..."

"In the walls, yep. I didn't wanna say it yesterday because I thought you'd say no, so... it's safe, I promise."

"Mmhm. Okay, yeah. Why not?" Alexa followed him in.

When Bruno turned around to lead the way, he found himself smiling when Alexa wasn't looking. This was also part of his master plan to impress Alexa. Showing off his navigation skills within the walls as well as his tricks of jumping and leaping and running through the tight and sometimes dangerous spaces.

Alexa squinted in the darker areas of the walls and kept close behind Bruno. He started to pick up speed and she grew apprehensive, "Hey, sorry, slow down a little? I can't se-eee!" her foot caught on a loose floorboard and she lurched forward. Luckily Bruno sensed it and he spun around to catch her.

"S-Sorry," he apologized. Abort mission, abort plan. This is not working.

"It's fine. How the heck do you-- oh yeah, a decade back here. Yep, proceed," Alexa righted herself and gestured for Bruno to keep going. He did but at a slower pace.

"Watch your head," he'd warn when there was a hanging plank of wood in certain spots. Bruno would keep saying things like that as they walked, to make sure Alexa stayed safe. He jumped across large gaps in the wood, which Alexa found challenging to do herself, so she opted for skirting around the edges of the crevices. Bruno did move impressively well around the space, and it did not go unnoticed by Alexa.

At long last, they made it to a door. Bruno pushed it open, "Welcome to my home inside home."

Before Alexa could even look at the living space, she watched two rats run towards them from across the floor, making her scream in fright.

"Sorry! I told them not to spook you..."

"I-It's okay!" Alexa grabbed Bruno's arm, "I mean, this is their home too, right?" she couldn't believe she was saying this, "I don't... well, I can put up with them. They're part of your life, so I can figure it out."

Bruno shook his head, "Yeah, but you look terrified."

"Well, I wouldn't say terrified," Alexa took mild offense with that assessment.

"So... you're okay with them?"

Alexa nodded, biting the inside of her cheek so she wouldn't express any outward fear as a rat had scurried up Bruno's leg and ended up on his shoulder, staring at her.

"You wanna hold it?" Bruno asked and picked up the rat with ease. When he moved it in Alexa's direction she took a step back. The two of them giggled, Bruno moreso at the situation.

"Ihit's... let's get there when we get there," Alexa smiled and scratched the back of her neck, finally taking the time to look around the space. There was one big cushioned chair and a pedestal with a minuscule stage looking thing on it. There were already two rats sitting up there.

"Oh, I almost forgot. I brought you some snacks," she held out her bag full of goodies. Bruno took the bag and he smiled at her, "How'd you know? I'm starving."

"Well, you don't show up at mealtimes so that's kinda how I guessed. Or maybe I can see the future, too, who knows?"

"Heh," Bruno chuckled as he took a bite out of a pastry, "Go on and take a seat while I set up."

Set up? Alexa did as she was told, sitting down on the one throne-like chair in the space. She hoisted her feet up into the chair with her when she saw one of the rats moving across the floor. Yep, feet are staying up here for the remainder of this experience.

"C'mere, c'mere. That's right," Bruno was kneeling and beckoning to the rats, "Yeah, you guys get nice snacks today if we do good. You got this," and he placed a few of them up on the stage.

Bruno took off his poncho and this was the first time Alexa believed she's seen him without his baggy cloak. She could really see just how thin his frame underneath was. He rolled his sleeves up and glanced Alexa's way.

"Las Leyes de Pasión," Bruno began in a deep voice, really laying it on thick in an accent. Alexa sat up straighter, realizing this was going to be interesting. She was really picturing Bruno sitting beside her so they could cuddle while they watched shows on a moving picture screen, like the one he mentioned visioning.

Bruno slid a cardboard frame onto the stage that fit the two rats' heads. Alexa's eyes went wide and she snorted but quickly covered her mouth up with both hands, seeing Bruno was quite serious about doing a real show. She played the noise off as a cough and Bruno didn't seem to mind. This was so... silly! Putting aside her notions about how crazy this all was, Alexa tried adjusting her headspace. She was an audience member and she was going to watch a show. And she'd be a good audience member, darn it. She got to know the characters Bruno created and what they all did for a living and how everyone was related or not related. He used the same two or three rats but kept switching out the scene tiles.

After one episode was finished, Alexa clapped, "Bravo!" She couldn't believe they were really gonna spend a whole day like this...

Bruno smiled wide, "Thanks! Thank you," he bowed, "I was worried there were too many twists that you wouldn't be able to follow it, but... you liked it?"

Alexa nodded, "Yes, I did. I've never seen anything like it," and she was honest about that part.

Bruno fed the rats on stage some berries, "You ready for episode two? We could probably binge this whole season today."

"Heh," Alexa put on a smile, "Bruno, could you do the show from over here if you wanted?"

"Well, yeah, but it's a lot less exciting cuz now that I'm over here, I have the background swatches. You won't have that if I'm sitting over there."

"That's okay. I think it'll still work out," Alexa tried pressing him in that direction.

"Well... I guess I did it that way on my own for this long, so... yeah, okay," Bruno set the single stage up and ran back over to Alexa. She was ready to scoot aside on the small chair to make room for him, but he opted for sitting on the floor at the foot of the chair. He faced forward. Alexa rolled her eyes but smiled, loving this clueless man.

Alexa would give him this: Bruno was a very dedicated performer. He did different voices for all the characters, even the narrator. She liked his narrator voice the most so far. With Alexa curled up in the chair, she eventually started to doze, listening to Bruno's story being more entertaining than watching the mostly motionless rats. In her head with her eyes closed, she could really picture these fictional characters and the settings they found themselves in. And Bruno didn't notice she was getting comfortable and sleepy since his eyes were also facing the stage.

She got through two more episodes just like that, able to open her eyes and look awake when Bruno would ask her questions in between episodes. He went straight into yet another one and Alexa continued her semi-resting as planned. Then he got to the end of this fourth episode and in a dramatic voice made an epic reveal.

Alexa sat up straight in her seat and stared at the rats on stage, mouth agape, "She had a husband this whole time!?"

"I know!" Bruno agreed emphatically, choosing now to take a snack break.

"How could she do that to him? And how could no one find out?" Alexa asked, more mad at the situation now.

"I guess we'll learn more in the next episode," Bruno shrugged his shoulders, as if he didn't already know the entire show's plots from beginning to end.

"Yes, please do more. I need to figure this all out because it makes no sense," Alexa nodded and she slid herself off the chair and sat on the floor with Bruno. He looked at her strangely but just accepted it.

As the new episode began, Alexa listened intently, gasping when Bruno elaborated the new character's backstory and how the whole hoax went down.

"So the gardener knew? This whole time?" she asked him, eyes wide.

Bruno hadn't really been interrupted during his shows before so he paused and nodded, not speaking back to her. He continued as planned, and Alexa continued to interject with her questions or thoughts. It started out as jarring and annoying to Bruno, but eventually he found it endearing.

"This is wild..." Alexa whispered at one point towards the end of the episode, and this was the comment that made Bruno crack. He hissed out a few giggles.

"No, finish it!" Alexa shoved him playfully.

"O-Okahay! Okay, just, shh," he nudged her in return and he was able to collect himself until the end of another episode.

"Crazy. Absolutely bonkers!" Alexa pointed out, staring at Bruno, "How did you come up with all this?"

"A lot of time," Bruno shrugged, scratching at his knee.

"Has the family heard these?"

Bruno shook his head, "No."

"Well, they should! Bring this out to all of them and have a watch party. It would be so much fun."

"Nn..." Bruno made a face, "Nah, I don't think that would go over well."

"You're embarrassed?"

"No--well, kinda."

"You shouldn't be," Alexa said truthfully, "This is really impressive."

"Thanks," Bruno mumbled and his right hand came around and scratched at his left arm, clearly feeling more anxious.

"Hey," she reached across him and moved his one hand off his arm, "Relax," she held his hand in hers and scooted around so she was now sitting cross-legged in front of him. Alexa took his other hand, too, and now she held both of them.

Bruno remained in silence and waited for something to happen.

"Do you have a practice or routine that calms you down when you're feeling anxious?" Alexa inquired, "I'm asking cuz I can see you're a nervous guy," she smiled sweetly, "And I know because I've had many, many nights in my life where I was so nervous that I could barely breathe."

"Well," Bruno spoke softly, not making eye contact, "I would take deep breaths a lot."

"And does that help?"

Bruno shrugged, "Yeah, I suppose it does."

"Have you ever tried meditating?"

Bruno made an apprehensive noise, "Ehh... I kind of get into that space right before I see a vision. So I don't think using that as a calming activity would be very helpful."

"Alright, okay," Alexa watched him as he talked, not once making eye contact with her, "Well how does this feel?"

"What?"

"Holding hands."

"It's..." really nice please never let go of my hands "good."

"Good," Alexa smiled, "Come here for a sec," she released his hands only to beckon him by patting her lap, "Put your head here."

"Are you sure?"

"Why would I be asking if I wasn't sure?" Alexa grinned, "Now, come over here."

Bruno adjusted himself so his head was resting in Alexa's lap and his legs were laid straight out in front of him. He folded his hands across his stomach. Now his big eyes were staring up at Alexa, "Okay. Now what?"

"Just relax," Alexa raised her hands and started to sift her fingers through Bruno's hair, giving soft massaging pulses to his scalp when she touched it. A shiver ran through the seer's body immediately, but she could feel him stop tensing after a few more passes with her hands.

"How does that feel?" Alexa asked in a whisper so as to not upset the mood.

"Mmm..." Bruno groaned in response. Alexa giggled, twirling and playing with the curls in Bruno's hair with one hand as her other massaged around his temple.

"Your head must hold a lot of tension since you're always seeing things," she speculated.

"Well..." Bruno cleared his throat, regaining some consciousness, "It's usually right behind my eyes. Like a bad migraine."

"Mm," Alexa hummed a response, moving her hands to the back of Bruno's neck.

"How do you know about all this?"

"I can assume where your pain stems from based on your gift. Which-I've-still-never-seen-so-I-think-it's-not-real-but-whatever," she talked quickly through her teeth for that last sentence before clearing her throat, "And I had to learn on myself what felt good when I'd be stressed."

Bruno chuckled at her dig at him, "Listen, I'd love to show you something, but I have to think hard on it for it to work. Something that definitely won't involve me-HEE!" he squeaked out and scrunched his shoulders up to his jaw like a turtle trying to sink its head into its shell.

Alexa burst out a laugh at that reaction, "Wohoah! What--?"

"You hit, like, a pressure point or something," Bruno brought a hand up to the area where Alexa's hands were resting.

"Oh, did I? Where? Like here?" and she dug in again just one little jab with her fingers. Bruno made the same noise and his hand stayed where it was, holding onto Alexa's wrist.

"Or did it feel more like...?" and Alexa used her short fingernails to trace the sides of Bruno's neck. The poor guy squeezed his eyes shut and a smile split his face, hissing out giggles, his whole body scrunching up at the touches, not just his neck.

"Neither! Stohoppit!" Bruno uttered through his giggling.

"Hm, maybe your nerves are also out of whack, then, since you say you aren't feeling anything," Alexa's hands darted away from Bruno's mildly defending ones and she latched onto the front of his neck, squeezing her fingers under his jaw in very specific spots. Spots that made Bruno jolt and a laugh come from his raspy throat. He kicked his sandaled feet in every direction. He could have just sat up and avoided the attack all together.

"So squirmy," Alexa teased, now sliding her fingers down his chest to rest on his ribs.

Bruno tried covering up, "Th-Thihis isn't helping anymore, I-I'm clearly not anxious in any way, so you cahahan-- Lexi!" he whined when she pushed all ten fingers into his boney ribs.

This felt so much more tickly since he didn't have his poncho on as an added layer of protection.

"Gimme those arms, squirmy worm," Alexa chuckled at his reactions to all of this. She grabbed Bruno's wrists and pulled them straight out so they formed a "T". She then extended her own legs and pinned Bruno's arms that way with her legs.

Bruno couldn't stop giggling and she hadn't even touched him this entire time she was shifting. It was making Alexa laugh with him, "Youhu're killing me, Bruno," she snorted. And her snort made Bruno laugh on its own.

"No! You're clearly killing me! If anyone is killing anyone else, it's you killing me--LEXI!" he screamed when she placed two fingers into one of his now exposed armpits. She wiggled them back and forth and in little circles and Bruno was quickly falling to pieces.

This brought back vivid memories of Pepa and Julieta going to town on him when they were kids after he would pester them. They'd pin him in various ways, one of those being the way Alexa had him now. And Alexa's tickling reminded him more of Julieta's: gentle but still teasing enough to make him laugh til his belly hurt. Pepa's tickling was... Bruno shivered at the thought. She was ruthless.

"The family is going to start wondering where all this laughter is coming from," Alexa pointed out, now using both hands to scratch a trail down Bruno's ribs to his sides, and then circle around until they were vibrating on his belly.

Bruno's laughter switched to very high-pitched almost immediately, and his legs curled up to try and be his only protection against Alexa's fingers.

"Noho, put those down," she pushed at his knees when they'd come up. Or if they got too in her way, she went after his ribs again.

Bruno's entire body was buzzing with some mix of adrenaline and electricity from all the laughter. These touches were still so foreign to him, not having any physical contact for a decade. And it lit through his body like someone was poking him with a cattle prod. His legs kicked so violently his sandals flew off, freeing his feet for his toes to curl.

Alexa removed her hands completely and placed them back on either side of Bruno's neck. She used her nails to trace shapes against the surprisingly vast amount of skin. Bruno had a long neck, she discovered. When Alexa made the switch from intense tickles to soft ones like these, Bruno emitted a string of snorts interlaced with childish giggles. And it made Alexa throw her head back and laugh, thoroughly enjoying herself.

Alexa lifted her legs now so Bruno could reclaim use of his arms and she fitted them back to the pretzel they had been before the tickling started. To her surprise, Bruno didn't move from her lap, when she honestly would've jumped up and gotten as far away from the tickler as she could if she were in Bruno's position. He just laid there, with a big smile on his face, tears brimming in the corners of his brown-- no, they were green-- eyes.

"You okay?" she asked him with a smile of her own, looking at his upside down face.

"More than okay," Bruno answered honestly.

Alexa thought that was so adorable. She brushed small strands of hair from Bruno's face and then cupped his cheeks. He reached a hand up and grazed his fingers on Alexa's cheek, as well. Alexa bent all the way down until her lips met Bruno's in a kiss.

And just because Alexa couldn't resist, she snuck her hand out and dug it into Bruno's exposed underarm from him extending it up to her face like that. He screamed in surprise and shot up so quickly he headbutted Alexa and she reeled back, holding her nose and forehead, where Bruno nailed her hardest.

Shocked at first and in slight pain, Alexa fell over onto her side in her own bout of breathless giggles.

"I'm sorry! I'm so sorry, are you okay?" Bruno crawled over to her, "No, you know what? Not sorry, you asked for it. Rude," he poked Alexa's side, making her jump and laugh again.

"I learned something," Alexa said when she let out the last of her remaining snickers.

"And what is that?"

"I have to tickle you a lot more often," Alexa smiled wide.

Bruno turned red and he smiled nervously. Alexa kept talking, "See, that is why I always have to do it. Your adorable face," she sat up and was able to pinch Bruno's cheek.

"Stop," Bruno kept blushing, "You sound like my sisters...."

"Oooh, I gotta get all the good details from them then on how to really getcha," Alexa grinned.

"Noho!" Bruno held her shoulders, "I'd actually die, don't even think about it."

Alexa laughed at his fear, "Thihis made my day, Bruno. Thank you."

"Heh," Bruno balled his hand into a fist and knocked it into Alexa's shoulder, "My pleasure."

"Can we watch a few more episodes now?" Alexa asked, rubbing her bare arms with her hands.

"Yeah," Bruno nodded and he stood up first to bring the snacks closer to where the two were sitting. He grabbed his poncho on the way and offered it to Alexa.

"You don't need it?"

"I've laughed hard enough to heat my body for days, thanks to you," he shook the clothing in front of her face. Alexa chuckled and she took the clothing and draped it over her shoulders. Bruno took his seat beside her on the floor. And before the new episode began, Alexa leaned in close to Bruno and rested her head on his shoulder, popping a cracker into her mouth.

Bruno sat there for an extra second to absorb the whole scene. Alexa, in his green poncho, snuggling up to him, her head resting on his shoulder. All because she felt so comfortable with him. And he felt loved in that moment; really, truly loved.

And Bruno sat with Alexa for a few more episodes, afternoon having turned into night, and now late night. Alexa's head grew heavy on Bruno's shoulder and he paused his acting to listen to her breathing and to see if she adjusted herself when he stopped the show. She was asleep, he was pretty sure. Her arm was entwined with his and their hands held each other. Bruno could feel Alexa's warm breath hitting his shoulder.

He quietly instructed the rats to knock the light off, which he knew they knew how by now. They'd done it when he'd fallen asleep many times in the walls, in the middle of a show. The inner walls of casita now grew dark, with some shreds of candlelight shining through the splits in the wall. Bruno leaned back and shut his own eyes. He was ready for sleep, too. And in the midst of him dozing off, his chin had fallen into place on top of Alexa's head. They were perfectly conjoined and cuddled up, asleep and content.

[hazbincalifornia]

Midnight Snack

Chapter 25: Blitzo gets peckish.

Warnings: As always, mpreg, and implied animal death. Also stuffing if that needs a tag I guess, and BABY VIOLENCE. (Violence committed by a baby, not against a baby.)

Likes, replies, and reblogs are all appreciated, both here and on ao3!

Ao3 link

Blitzo’s stomach gurgled, and his arms tightened around the pillow that he was hugging to his chest. A fussy, hungry stomach wouldn’t have necessarily been a problem, except for the fact that it had been doing it for the past hour, and he was just about ready to tear it right out of his skin and rip it in half. Acid sloshed around audibly in his empty gut- or maybe the freeloader wanted more room and was just squashing the organ down so much that it had resorted to griping as loudly as it could. Relatable fuckin’ content right there.

Dinner had been two burgers and fries smothered in hot sauce and mayo from the grease trap down the road, which was more than enough to coast through until breakfast. Besides, he’d be damned if the kid was going to make him deal with the grocery store any more than he had to in this condition. No, he was staying right where he was, especially considering he’d been denied any sleep last night. One day low on sleep was manageable with reduced caffeine, two would suck satan’s left tit.

“C���mon, that was enough and you know it, I don’t want you ruining my figure any more than you already have,” he grumbled as the muscles clenched around his stomach, wringing it out like a sponge and drawing a pitiful whine out of his throat. “I’m not gonna just- give in and give you whatever you want, daddy’s gotta do him sometimes and I’m not letting you empty out the fridge. I ate enough, siphon blood outta my system like a normal leech does. I’ve got plenty of that.”

The reply was another gurgling groan and a hard clench as Blitzo’s empty stomach demanded sustenance, this time loud enough to make his middle vibrate even through the pounds of baby. He stuffed the pillow over his mouth, drool leaking down the case and over his chin as he forced out a scream.

He had to take a few seconds to pant before setting a hand on the side of his stomach, fingers drumming. “This is a battle of wills, and I am not letting you win. Your baby-daddy already started all this shit, so I’m just going to treat you the same as him- by ignoring you as long as feasibly possible until you decide to pop up and make everything difficult. Sound good? Yeah, sounds perfect.” There was a nudge from inside and Blitzo nodded in satisfaction at the apparent agreement, settling back down on the bed. He’d gone to sleep hungry plenty of times before, the baby gut notwithstanding, he just had to muscle through this for the next few-

There was no time to muffle the next scream as a sudden pinching pain went from ‘noticeable’ to ‘holy shit who’s tearing up my guts with a chainsaw?’, and there was a thud and a shuffling of feet before Loona started pounding on the door.

“You having a heart attack in there or something?”

Blitzo clutched at his stomach, wheezing as he was clawed apart from the inside out. “N-no!”

“Look, if you die, I’m on the hook for the rent.” Still, there was a semi-worried vibrato to her voice, and he swallowed down the coppery taste flooding up with the saliva to his mouth.

“I’m- fINE-!” His voice pitched up at another pinch-turned-horrorshow and his claws dug all the way through the pillow, stuffing spilling out like viscera.

“What the fuck are you doing in there?” The doorknob jiggled. Where was a portable x-ray when you needed one? Or ultrasound, or whatever the fuck you used to look at a baby that was trying to kill him before it even got out yet. What kind of horrible mouth or claws must it have- oh, fucking hell, Stolas had said something about his kid having a razor-sharp beak from birth, hadn’t he?

“Okay, I’m coming in.” Loona eased the door open, already in her pajamas and clutching a package of opened peanut butter crackers tightly enough that crumbs were sticking to her fingers. “You look like shit.”

“I feel like shit, so good-” Sharp inhale for breath, let it out- “-To know that I’m all on the same page.”

She dropped down on the bed with a metallic creak. “What’d the kid do now?”

“It feels like they’re biting me again, but w-worse- fuck!” Another nip, this one dragging a line on the inside of the womb like they were drift racing in there. Wait, dragging? He swallowed down more coppery bile. “Okay, fine, fine, sheesh, I’ll fuckin’ eat something, happy you little shithead?”

Loona raised an eyebrow. “I didn’t say anything.”

Blitzo shoved himself up off the bed to wobbly knees. “Junior’s gotten real bold, and instead of just sucking up the meat I’m eating for them like a good little lump, they decided to put me on the menu- ow, fuck, I’m going, keep your baby-tits on!”

“Babies don’t have tits, Blitzo.”

“They do if I say they do, sweetie.” Blitzo ruffled Loona’s fur between her ears as he waddled across the room, pausing next to the TV to take a breath.

Loona raised an eyebrow. “Do you need me to bring you something? I don’t want you passing out in the middle of the apartment and tripping over you tomorrow morning.”  In response, Blitzo just waved a dismissive hand.

“I can handle walking across two rooms, Loonie.” The active chewing had paused for the moment, but whatever they’d shredded in there was still shredded, and he’d rather not make it any worse- he had work tomorrow, dammit.

The fridge bathed him in a sickly, hospital-like glow as he tugged it open, and drool immediately started leaking from his mouth as the smells of half-forgotten, time-ripened leftovers hit him. A small mouse with four red eyes leaped up from the floor when he opened the door, burrowing into a box of takeout on the bottom shelf that Loona must have gotten when he’d been at Stolas’s place. His tongue snapped out automatically, snatching its furry body up and slurping up the tail between his lips before swallowing, and it took a second for his brain to load enough to register- after it slid down his throat.

Holy shit, did he just…? It squirmed a little as it descended, little hairs stuck in his teeth, and his fingers tightened on the side of his stomach before he reached for the box it had been after to wash out the aftertaste.

Everything after that was a bit of a blur, although he did retain enough sense of mind to avoid the six-pack of cheap beer in the back that still had four cans on it. Better to not risk puking all of this up or ruining the kid any more than they already were. Carbs, meat, a few wilted veggies that Moxxie had pawned off on him, sweet, sour, cold chili and whole untoasted bagels- it didn’t really matter what it was as long as it was at least mostly edible (he was pretty sure he swallowed a wrapper at some point), he just needed it inside of him now. Smothering everything in hot sauce and salsa and mustard made it more palatable anyway, especially the ice cream. The kid didn’t start taking chunks out of him again, at least, so he must have been doing something right. More and more of the white fridge walls became visible as the floor around him littered with containers, and his stomach grew tighter before he finally slumped back against the nearby counter with a groan. His legs sprawled out on the cool tile, both hands now stained with a mixture of about five kinds of leftovers, and he cradled his stomach after muffling a burp.

“Are you happy now, you needy little shit?”

Blitzo didn’t really expect a reply and almost didn’t hear it over the churning gurgles of digestion, but a soft ‘eee’ of a hoot, more a whisper-screech than anything, murmured from his midsection. He stared down at it, the warmth of his full stomach counteracted by ice dripping down his back.

“Oh, of course you sound just like him.” His claws dragged along the sensitive, itchy-while-stretched skin before the protection spell sprung up and pushed the fingers away. It only let him touch his own stupid body when he laid his palm flat. “Sure, it’s cute now when it's all little and squeaky, but you’d better not be as entitled as he is, alright? Or as you are now, since I’ve gotta do everything for you until you’re born. Considering you just settled right down in there without even asking in the first place, I doubt it. Rude.”

There were no more noises other than his stomach grumbling about going from empty to full so quickly, and he stayed slumped against the cabinet for long enough to let some of it digest. He must have been more tired than he thought, because he swore that he already looked bigger than he’d been when he’d finished binging. Maybe it started swelling in a bad reaction from whatever fucked-up food cocktail he'd accidentally made.

When he didn’t feel quite so much like a boulder had gotten stuffed inside his guts, it took three tries to haul his ass off the tile and drag himself back to bed, huffing like a cop running for the last doughnut in the process.

The ice had crept from his spine to the rest of his bones and muscles as he tugged the blanket tight around himself, but at least the churning food kept his stomach warm, and he passed out as soon as his head hit the pillow.

[dumbdumbdetected]

“Once you get past the exoskeleton- thats a good cracker.” - Mark Eee Moo 2020

[riverdale-events]

Riverdale Reindeer Games filled this December with so much incredible content, it is sure to go down in history. From frozen noses to warm hearts, shining perfect Polaroid moments to awkward situations full of cute cringe—fandom content creators filled our heads with more than we could think to ask for. Our 8 themes and 2 mini games delivered more joy than a bag stuffed with presents, we accrued a total of 107 creations posted on Tumblr and 62 fics added to our AO3 collection.

Thank you so much to our participants for making the season bright! They all shined brighter than a room full of twinkling lights. Don’t forget to comment, direct message, like, reblog, flail—whatever your pleasure, but take a moment to show your appreciation for the talent and time spent by those who participated. Creators keep the fandom thriving! We raise our glasses to toast the new year and the fantastic content below!

Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree | varchie | edit, fic | @theeternalblue​

Bonding | bughead | fic | @findmeinpops​

The Perfect Tree | sweet pea x reader | fic | @worriestothewind​

A Christmas Emergency | swangs | fic | @findmeinpops​

Window Seat Snuggles | bughead | art | @orangenfrottee​

Deck the Halls With Boughs of Holly | bughead | edit, fic | @nothollywheeler​

New Traditions | bughead | edit, fic | @bettycooper​

a daydream (i never get to hold) | bughead | fic | @elizabethjonesiii​

Fool’s Holiday | bughead | fic | @ms-maj​

Kissing Beneath the 23rd Floor | bughead | fic | @sunshinebunnie​​​ (mini game)

Mistletoe Trap | bughead | fic | @sheriff-snikety-snake​​​ (mini game)

Bets and Broken Elevators | bughead | fic | @ms-maj​ (mini game)

all of the lights | bughead | fic | @imreallyloveleee​ (mini game)

8 Days of Christmas | varchie | edit, fic | @theeternalblue​

In Person This Year | sweet pea x oc | edit, fic | @worriestothewind​

Festive Bughead | bughead | art | @orangenfrottee​

comfort, joy, and sex | chughead | fic | @southsidestyle​

if only in my dreams | falice | fic | @deargrilledcheesusyouredelicious

in the mood | bughead | edit, fic | @rivernik​​

Radiant Beams | bughead | fic | @fishhoeksunrise​​

First Christmas | jughead x oc | fic | @theangriestpea​​

Secret Santas & Stairwells | bughead | fic | @secretsofthesky​​

Letter Exchange | bughead | fic | @ms-maj​ (mini game)

Community Service | bughead | fic | @crownsandponytails​​ (mini game)

Do You Hear What I Hear | bughead | edit, fic | @ms-maj​ (mini game)

First Christmas Gifts | sweet pea x oc | fic | @the-gargoyle-queen​​ (mini game)

Save Me | bughead | fic| @sweetbettycooper​

20 Seconds to Forever | bughead | edit, fic | @lovedinapastlife​​

Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas | varchie | edit, fic | @theeternalblue​

Christmas Market | bughead | fic | @findmeinpops​

baby, it’s cold outside | varchie | edit, fic | @tuesdayschildd​​

A Wish | bughead | fic | @bestpillowtalkever​​

It’s Christmas Eve (and they can see we’re in love) | bughead | edit, fic | @likemereckless​​

Secret Santa | sweet pea x reader | fic | @findmeinpops​

tried to reach beyond the emptiness (but neither one knew how) | falice | fic | @deargrilledcheesusyouredelicious​

All Because of Mistletoe | sweet pea x reader | fic | @worriestothewind​

Fake It (Til You Make It) | bughead | edit, fic | @themaddestofall​

A Very Ugly Invitation | archeryl | fic | @hbic-cherylblossom​​ (mini game)

Cuffing Season | bughead | edit, fic | @lilibetts​​

give a little, get a little | bughead | fic | @imreallyloveleee​

You. Me. Snowman. Now. | sweet pea x reader | fic | @findmeinpops​

Holiday Bughead Icons | bughead | edit | @theheavycrown​​

Going Sledding | bughead | fic | @findmeinpops​

Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas | varchie | edit, fic | @monicasposh​​

Naughty and Nice | bughead | fic | @findmeinpops​

Sleigh Ride | varchie | edit, fic | @theeternalblue​

(as long as you love me so) let it snow, let it snow, let it snow | fredsythe | fic | @fredsythe​​

Sweetie Snowpeople | bughead | art | @lovedinapastlife​

Mother Nature Plays Matchmaker | bughead | edit, fic | @strangenightsofdaydreams​​

Anastasia | bughead | gif | @obiwan​

in the arms of the angel | bughead | edit, fic | @mrscolesprouse​​ (mini game)

Fireplace Secrets | bughead | fic | @captain-kookabughead​​ (mini game)

Meet Cute | bughead | fic | @night-hawk94​​ (mini game)

Through the Snowfall | bughead | edit, fic | @noorakardemmomesaetre​​

You’ve Heard of Elf on the Shelf | cheryl x toni x veronica | fic | @at-cheryl-bombshell​​

A Cynic’s Christmas II | sweet pea x reader | fic | @findmeinpops​

After the Kids Have Gone to Sleep | bughead | fic | @findmeinpops​

coming to amerika | bughead | fic | @stirringsofconsciousness​​

west coast winter | bughead | edit, fic | @stonerbughead​​

Letters to Santa | bughead | edit, fic | @writeraquamarinara​​

Step Into Christmas | varchie | edit, fic | @theeternalblue​

New Traditions | bughead | edit, fic | @miss-eee​​

just one thing I need | bughead | edit, fic | @stillscape​​ (mini game)

Santa Baby | bughead | fic | @likemereckless​

if the fates allow | bughead | edit, fic | @elizabethbettscooper​​

Under Your Spell | sweet pea x reader | edit, fic | @southsidewrites​​

A History of Love | bughead | edit, fic | @lilibetts​

Santa’s Coming For Us | varchie | edit, fic | @theeternalblue​

Hogwarts and the Holiday Murder Mystery | bughead | edit, fic | @bettycooper​

The Betty Clause | bughead | edit, fic | @bettycooper​

The Nutcracker | bughead | edit | @theheavycrown​

What Would You Know | bughead | edit, fic | @gellsbellshead​​ 

Betty’s Bells and Barista | bughead | edit, fic | @lovedinapastlife​

a christmas request | alice, jellybean | fic | @deargrilledcheesusyouredelicious​

A Gingerbread Gala | bughead | edit, fic | @akabombshell​

better every year | bughead | edit, fic | @bugggghead​​

Nothing & Everything | bughead | fic | @lilibug--xx​​

Just A Little Favor | bughead | fic | @lanadeljones​​

Christmas Time: A Que Sera Coda | bughead | fic | @omgbarbiegurl​​ (mini game)

Lucky Number Seven | bughead | fic | @lanadeljones​ (mini game)

Regalos and Carnitas | varchie | edit, fic | @sheriff-snikety-snake​

Holiday Varchie Icons | varchie | edit | @theheavycrown​

our first christmas | falice | edit | @deargrilledcheesusyouredelicious​

A Cynic’s Christmas I | sweet pea x reader | fic | @findmeinpops​

The Southside Grinch | sweet pea x reader | fic | @theangriestpea​

twas the night before | fp jones, jughead jones | fic | @deargrilledcheesusyouredelicious​

One Last Christmas Gift | cheryl x toni x veronica | fic | @at-cheryl-bombshell​

We need a little Christmas | riverdale | edit | @stillhidden​​

Christmas Crackers | swangs | fic | @findmeinpops​

Cold as Ice | bughead | edit, fic | @madsinwonderland​​

i think i’ll skip this one this year | halice, fredsythe, polly | edit, fic | @halcooper​​

I Promise I’ve Been a Good Boy | bughead | fic | @findmeinpops​

most wonderful time of the year | bughead | edit | @princesweetpea​​

Holiday Jughead Icons | jughead | edit | @theheavycrown​

So This Is Christmas | bughead | edit, fic | @mieteve-minijoma​​

Christmas Messages | bughead | art, fic | @satelliteinasupernova​​

A Fake Christmas | bughead | edit, fic | @lizzybuggie​​

a northsider for christmas | alice | edit | @deargrilledcheesusyouredelicious​

a lifetime of promises | bughead | edit, fic | @catthecoder​​

Red Lights | bughead | edit, fic | @paperlesscrown​​

in case I stand one little chance | bughead | edit, fic | @iconic-ponytail​​

Elf B | bughead | edit, fic | @ithoughtyoulikedmereckless​​

waiting in vain | varchie | fic | @monicaposh​

lets hope tomorrow find us | hermiram | edit, fic | @halcooper​

Lonely Together | bughead | edit, fic | @emily-rose34​​

There is a belief about New Year | bughead | edit, fic | @aam-loves​​

Bring the Festive Back | bughead | fic | @captain-kookabughead​ (mini game)

[tearwater-teas]

🍂Journal ~ May 26🍂

Weight ~ 118.6 lbs

Eee sorry I’ve been absent the past 2 days. Usually that means I’ve had a weird binge/purge day, which I had the last two days. I’m so glad though bc I maintained at 118!! Today i ate more than I wanted, but I’m not too worried since it was mostly fruit veggies. I had some crackers, lettuce, cucumber, carrots, with about 1/3 cup of hummus, and I had about 1 cup of pineapple, 1/2 cup of blueberries, 1/2 cup of granola, and a little pear. I think I’ll be ok though. I hope you’re all well <3

[thefanficfaerie]

May I please have. . . 10. Person A: What are you holding?       Person B: [Name] said you liked goldfish.       Person A: The crackers. The cheese things you eat at parties. With Steve? Thanks! 😊

EEE!!! That is one of my favorite CJ/Danny interactions. SO YES!!! 

West Wing Quote Challenge 

[aiweirdness]

A neural network invents some pies

(Pie -> cat courtesy of https://affinelayer.com/pixsrv/ )

I work with neural networks, which are a type of machine learning computer program that learn by looking at examples. They’re used for all sorts of serious applications, like facial recognition and ad targeting and language translation. I, however, give them silly datasets and ask them to do their best.

So, for my latest experiment, I collected the titles of 2237 sweet and savory pie recipes from a variety of sources including Wikipedia and David Shields. I simply gave them to a neural network with no explanation (I never give it an explanation) and asked it to try to generate more.

Its very first attempt left something to be desired, but it had figured out that "P”, “i”, and “e” were important somehow.

e Piee  i m t iee ic ic Pa ePeeetae  a   e eee  ema iPPeaia eieer   i   i i  ie e eciie Pe eaei a

Second checkpoint. Progress: Pie.

Pie Pee Pie Pimi Pie Pim Cue Pie Pie (er Wie Pae Pim Piu Pie Pim Piea Cre Pia Pie Pim Pim Pie Pie Piee Pie Piee

This is expected, since the word “pie” is both simple and by far the most common word in the dataset. It stays in the stage above for rather a while, able to spell only “Pie” and nothing else. It’s like evolution trying to get past the single-celled organism stage. After 4x more time has elapsed, it finally adds a few more words: “apple”, “cream”, and “tart”. Then, at the sixth checkpoint, “pecan”.

Seventh checkpoint: These are definitely pies. We are still working on spelling “strawberry”, however.

Boatin Batan Pie Shrawberry Pie With An Cream Pie Cream Pie Sweesh Pie Ipple Pie Wrasle Cream Pie Swrawberry Pie Cream Pie Sae Fart Tart Cheem Pie Sprawberry Cream Pie Cream Pie

10th checkpoint. Still working.

Coscard Pie Tluste Trenss Pie Wot Flustickann Fart Oag's Apple Pie Daush Flumberry O Cheesaliane Rutter Chocklnd Apple Rhupperry pie Flonberry Peran Pie Blumbberry Cream Pie Futters Whabarb Wottiry Rasty Pasty Kamphible Idponsible Swarlot Cream Cream Cront

16th checkpoint. Showing some signs of improvement? Maybe. It thinks Qtrupberscotch is a thing.

Buttermitk Tlreed whonkie Pie Spiatake Bog Pastry Taco Custard Pie Apple Pie With Pharf Calamed apple Freech Fodge Cranberry Rars Farb Fart Feep-Lisf Pie With Qpecisn-3rnemerry Fluit Turd Turbyy Raisin Pie Forp Damelnut Pie Flazed Berry Pie Figi's Chicken Sugar Pie Sauce and Butterm's Spustacian Pie Fill Pie With Boubber Pie Bok Pie Booble Rurble Shepherd's Parfate Ner with Cocoatu Vnd Pie Iiakiay Coconate Meringue Pie With Spiced Qtrupberscotch Apple Pie Bustard Chiffon Pie

Finally we arrive at what, according to the neural network, is Peak Pie. It tracks its own progress by testing itself against the original dataset and scoring itself, and here is where it thinks it did the best.

It did in fact come up with some that might actually work, in a ridiculously-decadent sort of way.

Baked Cream Puff Cake Four Cream Pie Reese's Pecan Pie Fried Cream Pies Eggnog Peach Pie #2 Fried Pumpkin Pie Whopper pie Rice Krispie-Chiffon Pie Apple Pie With Fudge Treats Marshmallow Squash Pie Pumpkin Pie with Caramelized Pie Butter Pie

But these don’t sound very good actually.

Strawberry Ham Pie Vegetable Pecan Pie Turd Apple Pie Fillings  Pin Truffle Pie Fail Crunch Pie Crust Turf Crust Pot Beep Pies Crust Florid Pumpkin Pie Meat-de-Topping Parades Or Meat Pies Or Cake #1 Milk Harvest Apple Pie Ice Finger Sugar Pie Amazon Apple Pie Prize Wool Pie Snood Pie Turkey Cinnamon Almond-Pumpkin Pie With Fingermilk Pumpkin Pie With Cheddar Cookie Fish Strawberry Pie Butterscotch Bean Pie Impossible Maple Spinach Apple Pie Strawberry-Onions Marshmallow Cracker Pie Filling Caribou Meringue Pie

And I have no what these are:

Stramberiy Cheese Pie The pon Pie Dississippi Mish  Boopie Crust Liger Strudel Free pie Sneak Pie Tear pie Basic France Pie Baked Trance pie Shepherd's Finger Tart Buster's Fib Lemon Pie Worf Butterscotch Pie Scent Whoopie Grand Prize Winning I*iple Cromberry Yas Law-Ox Strudel Surf Pie, Blue Ulter Pie - Pitzon's Flangerson's Blusty Tart Fresh Pour Pie Mur's Tartless Tart

More of the neural network’s attempts to understand what humans like to eat:

Perhaps my favorite: Small Sandwiches

All my other neural network recipe experiments here.

Want more than that? I’ve got a bunch more recipes that I couldn’t fit in this post. Become a supporter of AI Weirdness to get more selected recipes as bonus content.

Want to help with neural network experiments? For NaNoWriMo I’m crowdsourcing a dataset of novel first lines, after the neural network had trouble with a too-small dataset. Go to this form (no email necessary) and enter the first line of your novel, or your favorite novel, or of every novel on your bookshelf. You can enter as many as you like. At the end of the month, I’ll hopefully have enough sentences to give this another try.

[hypercolored]

☆☆☆

eating log!!

♡ handful of goldfish crackers

♡ half a cherry coke

♡ 1 babybell gouda cheese

idk what my boyfriend is gonna make me eat but,,, i definitely know im gonna have to eat at least a full meal with him eee

[askthekuroshitsujiguys]

Hey giggle stitch! Last monday was my birthday! :3

Undertaker: ‘Eee hee hee, you should’ve said earlier and we would’ve ‘ad a nice party full of giggles and jokes from crackers!

Ciel: Crackers are for Christmas--I think YOU’VE gone crackers.

Undertaker: Wrong, mi’lord! Crackers are for every day, who can resist a cracker joke? Nobody!

[cest-la-vie7]

Unglams: A series 1- no, don’t steal my crackers 2- stahp ✋ 3- wa the horn pain sia 4- ‘if I kick her butt maybe she would notice me’ 5- day 45: I have gained the deers trust, they do not know that I’m not one of them 6- stop chasing meeee 7- eee the nose wet wet one 8- 😮 9- pls don’t whack me 10- the antlers look tasty (at Nara Park) https://www.instagram.com/p/ByxE-jHF5Pj/?igshid=101zpt10qdn5z

[lagustasluscious]

Ramen two weeks in a row you LUCKY DOG. Personally, I think it’s gonna be good. @wigglybug is kindly filling in for me the first lil bit bc because I may or may not have to throw myself on the mercy of the court re: a speeding ticket but I’ll be back soon hopefully to take over ladling up battered and fried marinated mushrooms, fried dulse, buttery corn and potatoes, scallions and parsley and avocado and rouille tare (say it: rue-eee tar-aye) and blackened old bay tomatoes: it’s CHOWDER RAMEN. No egg, @sunnoodles playing the part of oyster crackers. Slurp slurp vegan vegan #rammissary 5-7:30 tonight!! (at New Paltz, New York) https://www.instagram.com/p/BuEKqjTFXxm/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=16pzerrvm2lrw

[stranger-who-writes-fiction]

Does Kara ever bring Alex with her to work (her Daily Planet work, not her Supergirl work)? Because that would be hella adorable.

Oh yeah, absolutely. That is a Thing That Happens. 

Because there’s a ‘Take Your Kid to Work Day,’ and Kara bugs Perry, ‘Hey, hey. Does that include younger cousins?’ And Perry’s like ‘Whatever Kent get that copy to me by lunch and you can bring your damn dog for all I care.’

(Which is tempting, but. Krypto would be waaaay too distracting.)

But then Kara is SHOCKED and WOUNDED when Clark says he’s too old for that sort of thing.

‘But I thought you wanted to go into journalism?’

(And he does but right now he’s going through a phase--he’s going to write the next Great American Novel, he’s sure of it.)

So Kara’s all glum and Clark can’t stand it so he’s like ‘just take Alex.’

And thus, Alex Danvers gets to spend the afternoon in Kara’s cramped, cluttered office, eating animal crackers and asking a billion questions, only some of which are related to the newspaper business.

And Perry bustles by later, only to stop, poke his head in, and look confused.

‘...Is that your cousin?’

‘...Ye-eees...?’ Kara says with no degree of certainty. Alex pulls up the collar of her sweatshirt to hide her laughter.

‘But I thought--?’

‘What?’

‘...Never mind.’