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the-everlasting-dream · 6 years ago
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The Revelation - Chapter 15, TRR AU
Summary: Olivia takes things into her own hands and thank goodness she does. 
A/N: Two chapters in three days, who even am I? We are FINALLY getting to the fluffy part and eeee i’m squealing, scrapping the original plot was the best decision I ever made lol
Word Count: 5300+
Warnings: language
MASTERLIST
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‘Tea Elizabeth?’ 
‘Yes please Hana.’ 
‘Sugar?’ 
‘One… please. Um.. could you.. could you pass the biscuits?’ 
‘Of course.’ 
’Thank you.’ ‘
You’re welcome.’ 
 ‘Enough!’ Olivia Nevrakis slammed her hands on the table top, finallly voicing her frustration. ‘I can’t take it anymore! How can you just prattle on like nothing’s happened?' 
‘Olivia I don’t…’ Hana tried to interject, but was silenced by a dismissive wave from the redhead who turned on Elizabeth. 
 ‘So..?’
She paused, eyes wide with a biscuit half way to her mouth. The three of them were seated in the gazebo in the main garden, taking tea at Hana’s suggestion that the fresh air would be good for Elizabeth. She’d been back in Cordonia for about a week and was still nervous about everything, only leaving her Atlantean mansion if necessary. Hana had offered to move in with her to keep her company and eventually Elizabeth had confessed what had happened at the hospital. Her best friend of course had been very understanding and accommodating to her reclusive wishes. Perhaps a little too accommodating, Olivia thought, one red eyebrow arched as she waited for an answer. 
Elizabeth set the biscuit back down on the table, obviously uncomfortable under her scrutinising gaze. ‘Olivia I don’t know what you want me to do.’ 
She heaved an exaggerated sigh. ‘You can drop the pathetic act. It doesn’t suit you. Get over yourself and stop playing princess in your ivory tower. I want you to do something, anything Elizabeth.’ 
‘I did,’ Elizabeth replied, voice soft but holding a slight edge to it. ‘I went to the hospital, I saw him, he obviously didn’t want to see me. Or did you miss the part where Savannah slapped me?’ 
‘And you’re just gonna let that little tart get away with that?’ Hana gasped in alarm. 
‘Olivia!’
The redhead ignored her raising both eyebrows now, glare trained on Elizabeth who stubbornly refused to respond. After a few seconds, Olivia lost her patience.  
‘If you insist on being difficult, I’m not going to sit by an watch the two of you go in circles.’ With that she stormed off back to the house. 
Though she didn’t say his name, Elizabeth knew what Olivia was getting at but she couldn’t get over the image of Drake’s accusatory gaze on her. If he really wanted to see her, he would have called right? A stab of regret shot through her which she immediately pushed down. Her feelings were a mess and lately it was just easier to push them down and pretend they didn’t exist. This was usually easier said than done especially now as she could feel tears welling in her eyes, hating herself for being reduced to a pathetic blubbering mess.
‘Elizabeth…’ Hana consoled gently, sliding over to comfort her. 
 ‘Its fine. I’m fine,’ she replied, dabbing away the moisture before taking a big gulp, steeling her shaking voice. ‘I think I’ve had enough tea for today Hana. Thank you for organising this. I’m going back to my room to rest.’ 
Turning her head to avoid her friend’s disappointed look, Elizabeth hurried into the house, feet carrying her to her room as if on autopilot while she struggled to keep her composure at least until she was in private and the tears could fall freely. Once the door slammed shut, Elizabeth sank onto the bed, extremely aware of the pounding headache that threatened to split her head open. Popping a couple of painkillers, she sank down onto the pillows and cried herself to sleep.
-
A sharp insistent knocking woke her from the thin sleep she’d fallen into and elizabeth frowned curiously, knowing everyone knew not to disturb her when her door was closed. Rubbing her eyes sleepily, she opened the door to find Olivia standing on the other side of the threshold. 
 ‘You look like hell,’ she pronounced upon seeing her. ‘Clean yourself up and get downstairs. Don’t even think of arguing.’ 
‘Wh-what’s happening?’ Elizabeth queried, taking in the redhead’s casual outfit. 
‘You’ll see.’
More out of curiosity than anything, Elizabeth obeyed, sliding into her old college hoodie and a pair of jeans only to come down to find voices coming from the parlour. Pushing the door open, she found the room set up with snacks, drinks and a huge stack of boardgames in the background music was playing softly. 
‘What’s all this?’ She asked, directing her question to Olivia and Hana who were adjusting a tray of small shot glasses filled with a substance that looked suspiciously like chocolate. 
 ‘I’ve planned a boardgames night,’ Olivia announced before her usual confident facade dropped a little. ‘I’ve never actually hosted one of these but apparently this is what commoners do for fun?’ 
‘That’s one way of putting it,’ Elizabeth mused, perusing the selection of boardgames on the coffee table. before the doorbell rang. ‘Are we expecting someone else?’ 
Hana opened her mouth to answer before the redhead cut her off. ‘That’s probably the pizza, Hana can get that.’ 
 Elizabeth watched her retreat before turning back to Olivia as she strolled around the room. ‘Wow Liv I’m… impressed. I wouldn’t have take you to be the type to organise something like this. Its more like the kind of thing you’d go out of your way to avoid.’ 
 ‘Hmph I needed to do something to pull you out of that bat cave of yours. Come help me get the rest of the snacks,’ she ordered in a tone that brooked no argument. 
 ‘LITTLE BLOSSOM!’
Maxwell’s cry of enthusiasm reverberated so loudly inside Elizabeth’s head that she almost dropped the bowl of marshmallows she’d been instructed to carry before she was enveloped in a bear hug, marshmallows and all. ‘I’ve missed you so much!’ He exclaimed before looking sheepish. ‘I would have brought Cooper too but Olivia said no.’ 
The redhead rolled her eyes and gestured behind him. ‘He did bring someone else..’ 
 Elizabeth followed her gaze, behind Maxwell and Hana, behind the couch stood… Drake. 
He gave her a small uncertain smile when her eyes landed on him. For a moment she was frozen still, taking in his dark eyes, usual denim shirt and jeans that she assumed was his uniform by now. She watched him wipe his hands nervously on his clothes as he let her take him in. A host of emotions bubbled up at the sigh of him and she balled her hands into fists, digging her nails into her palms to distract herself from crying and tore her gaze from his. 
 ‘Um.. Olivia can I talk to you for a minute?’ 
‘I’m sure whatever you need to say can be said in front of the entire group.’ 
Elizabeth gave her a pointed look, internally cursing her friend’s stubbornness while at the same time not wanting to create a scene, knowing Drake was still watching her. ‘I think this is more of a private thing.’ 
 ‘Nonsense, we’re all at least acquainted here right?’ She replied brashly. 
 ‘Ol-‘ 
‘It’s fine,’ Drake interrupted, heading towards the door, ‘I think I left something in the car anyway.’ 
Elizabeth winced at the look on his face and once he was out the door, she grabbed Olivia and yanked her into another room. ‘Olivia what the fuck?’ 
‘If you do not the your hands off my arm, I will not hesitate to hack. Them. Off.’ 
She hastily released her forearm, her fingernails having left little crescent shapes in her pale skin. 'Olivia… you… you ambushed me?’ 
 Olivia rolled her eyes. ‘Please that’s nothing compared to what I really wanted to do. Look,’ she stared Elizabeth in the eye. ‘You weren’t getting anywhere on your own. I had to step in.’ 
 ‘I was perfectly fine!’
‘You were miserable and you know it. You know I’m right. Now you’re going to go back in that and we’re going to have some actual… ugh… fun.’ The redhead rolled her eyes in disgust. ‘You guys need some closure and this could be it.’ 
She immediately turned on her heels and Elizabeth had no choice but to follow. ‘So what are we playing first?’ 
 ‘Maxwell has already set up Monopoly so I guess we’re playing that first,’ Hana chimed in as they settled back into their seats. Halfway through the game when Maxwell had unsurprisingly landed in jailer six times, the air was still tense between Drake and Elizabeth who had barely glanced at each other twice the entire game. 
‘I think we could all use a drink,’ Hana intervened wisely, making for the drinks cart. 
‘And a change of pace,’ Olivia put in. ‘At this rate I’d rather watch Drake attempt perfect fork placement. That would be much more entertaining.’ 
‘Ha ha,’ he replied sarcastically. 'How about Snakes & Ladders? can’t go wrong with a tried and true?' 
'Ooo dibs on lil green guy!’ Maxwell chimed in, grabbing the gamepiece. 
 'I’ll take red… obviously,’ Olivia grabbed the corresponding token. 
 Not realising it, both Drake and Elizabeth reached for the blue piece at the same time and their fingers brushed slightly before they simultaneously jumped back, making her inhale a little at the heat of their skin against each others. She hadn’t touched him since..   
‘Hang on we’re one person extra.’ Hana observed, yellow token in hand. 
‘Richmond and I can share,’ Drake put in abruptly before looking at her in askance. ‘If you’re okay with that?’ 
Elizabeth nodded, still not recovered from their brief touch and now that his dark eyes were on her, suddenly found herself unable to speak. 
 ‘Lets play!’ Maxwell announced, grabbing the die. An hour later, they were on their fourth round of the game with all of them having won once before except Olivia to her chagrin but the atmosphere was much more relaxed, the awkwardness having mostly worn off and Drake reached for the die and handing to the Elizabeth. 
 ‘I trust you,’ he declared knowing that they were very close to winning again, except for two long snakes that stood in their path. 
 ‘I’ll try to make you proud,’ she grinned back and rolled. All eyes were on the little white cube as it spun across the board to finally land on…
‘Six! That means we win!’ Elizabeth chirped, moving the blue token six places to the finish line. 
 ‘Awwww,’ Maxwell whined. 
 ‘Ugh I hate this game,’ Olivia groaned. 
 Drake’s eyes sparkled when he looked over at her. ‘Nice moves Richmond.’ 
‘I had a good teammate,’ she grinned back at him, feeling at ease for the first time in months. When their eyes met, there was a kind of magnetic attraction sparking in the air between them and she took a moment to really take him in. Despite her fragmented memory, there was something about him that was just so familiar and… comforting. Realising she’d been staring a little too long, Elizabeth turned away, hoping her hair covered her face enough to hide the blush. 
 ‘Anyway what do we win?’ 
 ‘I didn’t know we were playing for a prize,’ Hana observed turning to Olivia. 
‘Don’t look at me, I don’t do all… this,’ she gestured vaguely to the room. 
 Drake rose to his feet and grabbed a packet of graham crackers and the bowl of marshmallows from the table. ‘Maybe its a good time to break these out.’
Elizabeth watched over his shoulder as he carefully roasted the marshmallow over the fireplace until he deemed it perfectly cooked before trapping it between graham crackers and a piece of chocolate and presenting it to her. 
‘A s’more,’ she reasoned, looking up at him. 
‘The best you’ll ever eat.’ 
He gave her a reassuring smirk as she took a tentative bite. Elizabeth’s eyes widened at the explosion of sweetness in her mouth, the gooey texture of the marshmallow mixing perfectly with the chocolate, complimented by the crunchiness of the graham crackers. 
‘Told ya,’ Drake’s grin widened, turning back to make another for Maxwell who was already bouncing in anticipation. He looked questioningly towards Olivia who shook her head. 
‘Count me out. I’ve had enough peasantry for one night.’ 
Elizabeth took another bite just as the tingling sensation she’d come to associate with memory recall buzzed in the back of her head. Instead of the usual pain that she experienced, this time it seemed much more subdued and instead of fighting it like she usually did, she let it flow. 
-
She could feel the breeze of the night air brushing her hair as the warmth of a fire warmed her cheeks. Drake was there, sitting next to her, hands on hers to adjust the way she was holding the stick over the fire so that the marshmallow wouldn’t burn. 
‘That’s better.’ 
‘So you’re the s’mores expert?’
‘Damn right. i’ve made hundreds of these.’ 
The way his face softened in the firelight was fascinating as he recounted a story of going camping with his dad as a boy.Despite that, we loved it. He smiled shyly at her, a little embarrassed to be caught so tender. She watched him affectionately, he looked so happy talking about his family, she could tell it was important to him.
‘That sounds so wonderful… and simple.’ 
‘The best things in life usually are, Richmond.’ 
A strong urge bloomed in her chest and she was overwhelmed with the urge to kiss him, to feel his lips on hers even for a moment. He must have seen it because he was leaning in too before checking himself and pulling away, though his eyes betrayed the front he struggled to put on, telling her he wanted this as much as she did. The memory seemed to skip forward a little and Elizabeth guess that Drake must have just told her about the scandal at the coronation that she’d read about in the newspapers but still had no memory of. 
‘I never knew you wanted to come after me.’
His face was bashful. ‘Oh well yeah.. I just wanted to make sure you were okay.’
‘You were worried about me..’
‘Honestly, I still am.’ His head dropped before he turned to look her so deep in the eyes she thought she might never escape his intense dark eyes. ‘I don’t know what I would do if something like that ever happened to you.’ 
‘Oh Drake..’
She was already leaning in again, his cautious glance over his shoulder warned her against giving in but she couldn’t contain her affection for him. He cares… 
‘A kiss would make me feel better.’ 
‘Richmond..’ War broke out on Drake's face as he debated between duty and passion. ‘We can’t..’ 
‘But I want you right now.’ The need to feel him against her burned hotly inside her so badly that if she didn’t have him she would have exploded right there and then. 
‘Dammit Richmond.’ 
The look on his face told her his resolve was breaking down. She couldn’t stop herself from leaning even closer and he responded immediately, closing the gap, his lips finding hers gently at first quickly giving into the heat and desperation that dwelled in both of them. His hand came around her waist to pull her closer as hers wound into his soft hair. This was all she wanted, all she ever wanted for the rest of her life. 
-
'Richmond, you okay there?’ Drake’s voice pulled her out of the memory. ‘Do I.. do I have something on my face?' 
 Elizabeth shook herself, realising she’d spaced out and was staring at him intently. ‘Yeah.. I’m fine,’ she mumbled before looking closer. ‘Actually you gotta little something..’
He used the back of his hand to brush at his mouth. ‘Gone?’
‘You completely missed it,’ she couldn’t help but giggle at his failed attempt to wipe away the large chocolate streak. 
Before she knew what was fully happening, Elizabeth raised her hand to his face and in gentle motions, swiped the chocolate away from his mouth. She heard Drake’s slight gasp as her thumb softly grazing the skin in an intimate gesture that sparked that feeling in both of them, like in her memory. 
She looked up into his eyes and found that the spark lead to a tiny lick of flame in her belly now was present in his. His eyes dropped to her lips and she wondered if he was thinking the same thing as she was. Like in her memory, Elizabeth found herself leaning forward a little, wondering how the feeling of his lips compared to what she remembered. Both of them drew closer and closer as if magnetised by an invisible force, movements slow and hesitant, lips inches awa-
CRASH!
The pair immediately pulled away from each other to find a very tipsy Maxwell bending down to pick up the bowl of popcorn he’d tipped onto the carpet. 
‘Sorry, sorry, sorry,’ he exclaimed, trying to help but knocking over more empty cups in his intoxicated state. 
Drake leapt to his feet. ‘Looks like someone’s ready to go home.’ 
‘Drake buddy.’ 
‘Don’t call me that,’ he grumbled, slipping Maxwell’s arm over his shoulder and looking apologetically towards Elizabeth. ‘I should get this one home. Can someone walk us out of this maze?’ 
 Receiving a meaningful prod from Olivia, Elizabeth stepped forward. ‘I’ll do it.’ 
When they’d found their way out the front door, Drake shifted a sleeping Maxwell on his shoulder before turning to her. ‘Thanks for tonight Richmond. It was… I had fun…’ 
‘Me too..’ 
 He paused as if he wanted to say something and thinking better of it turned away instead. Elizabeth’s stomach dropped as she watched him leave, emotions in a twist after her memory recall and the moment they’d shared in front of the fireplace. It  had left her breathless, hungry for more and overall confused about her feelings towards him. Whatever they were, they were certainly strong but he didn’t seem to thi- 
‘Richmond!’ 
She snapped her head towards Drake who was jogging back to her, having put Maxwell in the car. ‘I had fun tonight,’ he declared again, confusing her even more. ‘Would you… that is… do you… Um.. what I’m trying to say is… Would you like to go out with me?’ 
 Elizabeth felt her eyes widening. ‘Like on a date?' 
‘Yeah, like a date,’ Drake affirmed, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. ‘Only if you want to.’ 
 Doubt flicked for a second before she recalled her memory and the undeniable attraction between them earlier. ‘I’d love to.’ 
 Relief flooded his face as soon as the words left her mouth. ‘That’s… uh… wow. D-does tomorrow work for you?’ 
She nodded, speechless by the goofy grin on his face. 
 ‘Seven good?’ 
‘I’ll be waiting.’ 
 Drake’s grin widened. ‘Great. Tomorrow then.’ 
‘Tomorrow,’ Elizabeth promised, standing in the doorway until he’d gotten in the car and drive off before shutting it and leaning against the wall, unable to contain her smile.
-
‘So no indication of what activity he’s got planned?’ Hana called from where she was seated on the couch in the boudoir.
‘Nope, just that he’d pick me up at seven,’ Elizabeth’s voice was muffled as she wrestled herself through yet another outfit suggested by her friends. 
‘I don’t think this is the one.’ She emerged from behind the screen in a frilly pink dress with lace ruffles and immediately wrinkled her nose at the sight of herself in the mirror. ‘I look like a bakery threw up on me.' 
‘You’re right, you’re right,’ Maxwell chimed in, pacing the floor, past the numerous discarded outfits on the floor, waving his hands theatrically as he spoke. ‘We need something versatile, yet elegant. Functional yet fashionable. Simple but classy, understated but not too understated, just the right amount of uh... stated-ness.’ 
‘What about this one?’ Elizabeth asked, stepping out from behind the screen having grabbed another dress and changed into it during his external monologue. 
 Both of her friends lit up at the sight of her. 
 ‘Oh Elizabeth,’ Hana gasped. ‘…that’s perfect,’ Maxwell finished.
-
‘Okay, okay, okay,’ Elizabeth murmured to herself, smoothening her hands down the front of her dress to dry her sweaty palms. ‘He’ll be here any minute now.’ 
With her hair done in loose waves, braided to frame her face and a touch of makeup on, she tried not to pace in anxiety. She’d been on first dates before and this one was no different right? Still she couldn’t shake the feeling that this was important somehow, that it would either make or break their entire relationship or what was left of it. A couple minutes past seven, the doorbell rang and she gave herself a final glance in the mirror before heading to open the door for Drake. His eyes went wide when he saw her. 
‘Wow, you look…'
'Over dressed?’ She offered, smoothening down the front of her green dress again. Out of all the outfits they’d tried on, including her new selection of duchess clothing, her old green dress felt the most right. reaching far back in her memory, past the haziness, she could recall wearing it on that first night in New York when she’d taken Drake, Liam and their friends to the secluded beach. It had always served her well and she’d almost come to think of it as lucky. 
 ‘Stunning,’ Drake finally finished before handing her a bouquet of flowers. ’Not to be cliche but I got you these. I didn’t know which ones you liked..’   
‘They’re perfect,’ she assured him, lifting the lilies to smell their fragrant aroma. ‘You look nice too.’
‘Oh,’ a blush appeared on his cheeks before Drake smoothened down the navy button down he was wearing. ‘Thanks.’
‘So where are we going?’ She piped up, curiosity brimming since the day before once they were in the car. 
 ‘All in good time, Richmond.’ The smile he gave her from across the centre console was enough to warm her inside. 
-
'Watch your step now, it gets a bit finicky here,’ Drake warned. 
They’d only driven about twenty or so minutes before he’d parked the car and grabbed a picnic basket out of the back and gestured for her to come with him. Elizabeth glanced around warily at her surroundings, they were in a different part of the city now, more crowded and congested than she’d seen before, one of the poorer areas she guessed. 
 ‘Are you sure you know where you’re going?’ she asked suspiciously as Drake paused yet again to gather his bearings. 
‘I wouldn’t lead you astray Richmond,’ he assured her before indicating towards a set of stairs. ‘Watch your step now.’ 
 Doubt still sat in the pit of her belly as they picked their way up the narrow staircase that opened up to- 
‘Wow.’ 
Elizabeth took in the view from the spacious rooftop where she could see the entire capital in all her splendour, lights twinkling out like a carpet below her. She turned in a slow circle to take in the fairy lights casting their warm glow down from the canopy hanging over their heads to soft blankets and collection of pillows that was to be their setting tonight. 
 'Would you like a drink?’ 
 She glanced nervously at the green bottle he was holding. After her accident she’d stayed away from any and all forms of drinking and she wasn’t about to test her limits now.   
‘Don’t worry its non-alcoholic,’ Drake added to reassured her. 
 ‘Oh then yes please. This is amazing,’ she breathed accepting a glass. ‘How did you find this place?’ 
He shrugged from where he was kneeling, unpacking the picnic basket. ‘My mum used to buy her spices from the lady that lives downstairs and we used to play up here while waiting for her. It's got the best view of the whole city. Thought you’d like to see.' 
‘Its a phenomenal view,’ she repeated. 
‘Yeah it is,’ he replied and Elizabeth glanced over to see his eyes on her. She coughed nervously, nodding to the two plates of spaghetti carbonara he’d set up. 
 ‘You made that?’ 
'I do have some talents you know..’ 
 ‘You mean something other than hanging in the back of ballrooms and sulking?’ The quip was out of her mouth before she realised and Elizabeth watched an identical look of surprise bloom on Drake’s face before it morphed into a smile. 
 ‘Guess you’ll have to stick around long enough to find out.’ 
‘I guess I’ll be the judge of how good you claim to be,’ she nodded towards the plate, raising a mouthful and taking a bite. 
‘Well?’
‘Not bad, a little too heavy on the salt but I guess that’s to be expected,’ she replied cheekily, testing the waters between them again. 
‘Everyone’s a critic,’ he gestured in mock exasperation but his eyes gleamed back at her.
‘In all seriousness though, this is pretty good. You do good work Walker,’ Elizabeth replied, feeling much more at ease now, a thrill running through her as Drake winked. 
‘You can always count on me to find the right food.’The words rang a distant bell in her head as a strange sense of de ja vu hit her. Where had she heard that?‘
You okay?’ He asked, noting her changed expression. 
‘Yeah it just feels like I’ve heard that before..’
Drake was looking at her more carefully now. ‘That’s probably because I’ve said it before.’
‘Oh?’ Elizabeth leaned forward, ready to hear about this. 
He cleared his throat nervously, a habit she was beginning to recognise as one of his hallmarks. ‘See this one time we were in Italy-‘ 
‘We went to Italy?’ 
‘Yeah with the royal engagement tour,’ he informed her. ‘I’d invited you out to dinner, not unlike this but I didn’t want to call it a date for some reason, probably because...' 
A cool breeze floated through the air, ruffling her hair a little as Elizabeth listened to him recount the story of their first non-date, between bites of spaghetti. 
 ‘Wow,’ she replied when Drake was done. ‘That sounds like me alright… we.. I sound happy.’ She couldn’t help smiling faintly. 
‘Yeah happy that you caught me off my guard for once..’ 
‘Sounds like you didn’t mind too much.’ 
His eyes glittered as he took her in. ‘Yeah, I didn’t.’ 
He was just about to say something else when a string of shouts in Greek rang out from below them, the locals getting into a disagreement of sorts over produce. Drake’s ears went red as the profanities grew louder and louder. 
'Sorry.. not exactly the kind of atmosphere I wanted to have for a first date,’ he laughed nervously.   
'Its okay,' she giggled now that the shouts were dying down. They sat in silence until the sounds of a band playing filtered up to their vantage point. 
 'Would you like to dance?’ Drake asked suddenly. 
Elizabeth’s eyebrows lifted. 'You can dance?' 
'Uhh.. yeah I can,’ he mumbled. 'You taught me actually.'
'Oh I did?’ 
There was still so much she couldn’t remember and that reminder scared Elizabeth to her core. She’d liked all she’d heard and remembered so far but what if there was something she didn’t? What would she do then? 
'Yeah I mean if you don't want to,’ Drake’s ramblings brought her out of her introspection, his voice flat.’It's fine.' 
Elizabeth watched his face fall a little before she made a split second decision, taking a leap of faith. 'No Drake I'd love to.’ 
His head picked up and she nodded again to affirm him before he stood up and held a hand out to her. They made their way to the middle of the rooftop, where under the stars Drake gently positioned them into the starting position for a simple waltz. Elizabeth could not help but inhale sharply at the sensation of his hand in hers, skin warm as he guided her slowly across the floor. Her feet seemed to move of their own accord now, body reponse to his guidance and soon enough they were gliding across the floor in the traditional Cordonian Waltz, Drake’s eyes never leaving hers. 
 ‘I remember,’ she breathed softly, looking down at where their feet moved in perfect complimentary movements. 
 He nodded encouragingly. ‘Your brain may not remember but your muscles do.’ 
 Elizabeth allowed him to spin her into a delicate twirl, her hair and dress trailing behind after her as a sense of peace settled over her for the first time that entire night. Drake was tucking a lock of her hair out of her face from where it had come undone, a small gesture but strangely intimate, fingers gently grazing her ear before dropping back to her waist. Entwined so closely, the word and all her problems seemed to fade away and she took a moment to really take in how handsome he was, slightly fragile in his own way just like she was but handsome none the less. She couldn’t describe it but being right here, right now in this moment just felt inexplicably right..  
‘Have I told you how amazing you look tonight?’ He murmured softly. 
 ‘You have,’ she whispered back just as quietly, not wanting to break the spell they’d weaved together. ‘I think I’ve mentioned how nice you look too. I thought you said you only dress up if there’s someone you wanted to impress.' 
Drake’s eyes never left her as he turned her in another graceful turn before guiding her back to him. 'Yeah well... I guess I found someone worth impressing.' 
She cocked her head to the side. 'Wait why does that sound so familiar?'
He sighed deeply before answering. 'Because I said the exact same thing to you on the night of the Coronation.
'Tell me more?'
As Drake talked the memory took shape in her mind and suddenly she could see it all clearly, playing out in her head as if she was watching a movie. Elizabeth was suddenly hit with the realisation that it was that night that had changed everything for her. Even if he hadn’t been sure about them, she was. And even if Liam had proposed that night, she knew what her answer would be. It was standing right in front of her now. 
 Once again there was that magnetic pull rekindled between them as Elizabeth and Drake stood face to face, lost in each other’s eyes, barely swaying to to music that had long since ceased. If she’d made the choice once, what was stopping her from doing it again. Elizabeth thought to herself, taking him in for the tenth time that night. He was closer now, merely a couple of inches away, close enough for her to reach forward but unmoving, waiting for her to close the gap. Suddenly the prospect of them, of him seemed much too overwhelming as all her insecurities came crashing back in, causing Elizabeth to turn her head away. 
 ‘Sorry,’ she mumbled, ashamed and embarrassed. ‘This is too fast.’ 
 ‘It's okay,’ Drake’s chest rumbled form where it was pressed against hers as he gave her a small reassuring smile. ‘I’ll wait as long as you need to.’ 
‘Thank you for understanding,’ she murmured back, meaning every word. 
‘Besides its getting kinda late, I should be getting you home.’ 
She nodded and a short drive later they were back at the door to her duchy, both standing on the porch, unsure of what to do until Drake finally spoke up. 
'Can I…um… May I kiss you goodnight? On the cheek of course.'
'Oh! Sure,’  He drew in close, planting a chaste kiss on her face. 'Goodnight Richmond.’ He gave her a soft smile. 
 'Goodnight Drake,’ she replied, watching his broad backed figure climb back into his car and drive away before closing the front door and leaning against it. Elizabeth raised a hand to her cheek that radiated warmth from the spot where his lips brushed her face, smiling to herself as she made her way upstairs for the night. 
The smile remained on her face long after she was well asleep. 
-
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silma-words · 4 years ago
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14. “Just please be my best friend right now, not the guy I just confessed my love to.” for adrian x mc?
N/A: Thank you for the prompt @detectivedumortain 😊 I don’t know if this is what you had in mind, but I hope you will like it!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Pairing: Adrian Raines x MC (Ellie)
Rating: PG-13
Warning: Alcohol consumption
Category: Random fluff
Summary: Bloodbound AU (after book 1 – the events of book 2 never happened) – While Ellie is gone out with her friends, Adrian receives a much unexpected message from her after she has had one too many drinks…
Inspired by prompt #14 from Prompt List #1: “Just please be my best friend right now, not the guy I just confessed my love to.”
Words: 2450
**Disclaimer: Characters and background plot are the property of Pixelberry.**
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The hangover
Adrian was lying lazily on his couch, nose buried deep in the folds of an old worn-out book, when a sound made him jump out of his concentration, drawing his attention to the phone lying face down on the coffee table. He hesitated for a moment, his eyes darting between the device and the page he very much wanted to keep exploring. When the ping was immediately followed by another four, he smiled fondly and dropped the book onto his lap, knowing with certainty who these texts would be from.
*You don’t know what you’re missing*
*Drop your boring book and join us*
*I promise you won’t regret it*
*They have that fancy whiskey you love, Macallan Sherry Oak*
*And play decent music that even you would approve of*
Her texts made him chuckle, secretly filling him with warmth knowing that she was thinking about him on her night out with Lily and a few of their friends. As much as Adrian wanted to spend all of his time with her if he could, he was convinced that they both needed some time for themselves once in a while. Especially when Ellie and Lily were planning to meet with some of their common friends, with whom it was always a little tricky to keep up appearances to make sure they did not find out about the vampire world.
Adrian was not a huge fan of texting, but he couldn’t leave her hanging. That, and he also did appreciate the chance to interact a little with her despite the distance.
*Macallan Sherry Oak, hum? Consider me impressed*
The fact that she remembered which whiskey his favourite was made him smile. She did not lie during her interview: she did have a great memory.
*Sounds tempting, but maybe another time? I feel that I’d enjoy this new bar way more with you alone*
Once he read over his text again, he worried for a second that it might have been a tad too blunt. He really needed to get a hand around these ‘emoji’ thingies, and start using those. It took a few minutes until the phone pinged again with her response.
*Is that a date then, Mr Raines?*
The winking smiley face ending her message eased his worries instantly. Another proof that emojis did actually have a purpose.
*Sure it is, Miss Reed*
His answer was met with a flurry of pictograms, making him smile brightly, before he drifted back to his reading, confident that Ellie would be soon too distracted by her friends to continue their exchange. And he was right. His phone remained awfully quiet for hours, letting him indulge in his ‘boring book’ (her words) and slowly doze off on the sofa.
When he eventually woke up from his unexpected nap, his attention was captured by the flickering light of his phone, indicating that he had missed a few notifications while he was out. A couple of work emails, a few newsflash from his financial news app, and... eleven text messages, and five missed calls. All from Ellie.
He raised up quickly to sit properly and open the messages, a ball forming in his throat at the idea that maybe something had happened. It wouldn’t be the first time. This woman had a talent for trouble. But his worries faded instantly upon browsing quickly over her texts, which were... nothing but a succession of random pictures of her evening, accompanied by random sentences full of typos. The series of text ended with a bunch of random fruit and veg emoji that Adrian was not quite sure how to interpret.
Adrian chortled at this. Well, the girls were having a good night by the looks of it!
Checking the timing of her missed calls, he saw that these had been only a few minutes apart, but that she had eventually left a couple of voice messages. He could not repress a laughter upon hearing her inebriated voice as he started listening to the first recording, nearly able to picture from her pitch the blissful smile that must have adorned her lips as she spoke.
*Hey, handsome! I guess you’re probably asleep or something but... huumm, I just wanted to hear your voice... because I... hum, well... I guess ‘cause I’m missing you like crazy right now and I wish you were here... although tis’ probably best you’re not, you’d probably be embarrassed of my sorry drunk ass right now but... aaarh, I guess I just wanted you to know that I miss you, even if I see you aaaalll the tiiiime and... aaarrg I probably shouldn’t say that... you’re goin’ to freak out and think I’m like some kind of overly needy panda bear clinging to your leg... oh god, why the hell am I sayin’ t...* /end of message/
Adrian’s smile was nearly reaching his ears by the time that first message was cut by the robotic voice, the corner of his eyes crinkled with amusement, but his eyes gleaming with warmth at the sound of Ellie’s declaration. The seconds he had to wait for the next voice message to play nearly seemed interminable.
*Hum, well... sorry about that... hum… right, hum… nevermind! Well, I should probably get going now and leave you to whatever your old ass is doin’ right now but… aaarh I guess I’ll see you soon at work on Monday anyway… or before if you want, or… but if you don’t that’s fine… aaarh ok, that’s me hanging up now, before I get even weirder… byyyye!! I love you!.......... ooohhh sh…* /end of message/
Well. That was a hell of a message. Adrian was beaming, the sound of her voice still ringing in his ears, the sweetness and awkwardness of her ramble warming his body all over. And his heart was slowly restarting after it had jumped and landed with a thud when he had heard her last words.
He had definitely not been expecting that. Neither did she, by the sound of the muttered curse that seemed to have followed. Neither of them had spoken these words before. Neither of them had dared rushing things by voicing their feelings out loud. Although to Adrian, those feelings were as clear as day. Silently expressed in the way he looked at her, touched her, cared for her. But he did not want to presume that Ellie was feeling the same, although he had been desperately hoping so. Hearing her saying it out loud was a relief, an unexpected gift that he was not still entirely sure he deserved.
But what to do now? Should he say it back? Run to find her to tell her he felt the same? She might not even remember saying it, judging by the state of intoxication she seemed to have been under when she called. She might even regret it, or might not have even meant it. The conflicting thoughts now rushing through his head instantly washed down the smile from his lips. Oh God, it was like being a teenager all over again!
He had to go and see her. At least to check if she had made it home ok.
His mood swinging from elation to anxiety as he was replaying her messages in his head, he made his way to Lily’s and Ellie’s apartment, eager to see her but nervous about what he should say. That journey seemed to last forever. So did waiting at the door for someone to let him in, his ears trained on the slow and familiar heartbeat he could hear through the solid wood. Luckily, Lily was quick to answer the door, although she was clearly surprised.
“Hey A!” she greeted him with a smile, before furrowing her brows in concern. “Oh no, what kind of messages did she send you? Did she freak you out?! That was a bit of a struggle at some point to get her hands away from her stupid phone..!”
“No, no, don’t worry Lily”, he reassured her. “I… I just wanted to check up on her as the night seemed to have been quite… wild?”.
Lily sniggered at his choice of words.  “Oh yeah, that was a good night!”, she beamed, gesturing for him to come in, before adding with a grin, “… although I don’t know what Ellie would say right now… I had kind of forgotten the lovely after-effects that overly sweet and cheap cocktails can have on a human organism… and so did she, I reckon.”
Lily giggled a little at this, shooting an adorable apologetic grin at Adrian as if to prevent him from even thinking about blaming her for Ellie’s massive hangover. If she had reached that stage yet.
“Well, may I go and see the damage for myself?” he asked with a grin.
“Be my guest! But I hope you have learnt how to block your nostrils over the years, coz in there... yuk!”
They both shared a laugh at this, as Adrian dropped his coat and jacket on a chair before heading towards Ellie's room, bracing himself as he knocked softly at the door “Ellie? May I come in?”
His call was met by the sounds of ruffling sheets and by an intelligible grumble that he interpreted as a ‘yes'. Slowly pushing the door open, his eyes quickly adjusted to the darkness of the room to find Ellie’s form, surprisingly not tucked in the sheets, but instead awkwardly sat on the floor by her bed. Her cheek was resting on the edge of the mattress, her arms sprawled around her head lazily as if to prevent herself from slipping off to the floor.
Adrian quietly crossed the room to kneel by her side, laying a comforting hand between her shoulder blades while reaching over her arm to brush away the sticky strands of hair from her face, revealing a pale figure staring ahead into nothingness, her mouth slightly open as she was taking in shallow breaths.
“Oh sweetheart…” he sighted softly, offering her a warming smile as her eyes finally seemed to have focused on him. Caressingly gently the burning skin of her temple, he offered: “Do you want to stay down here, or do you want me to move you to the bed?”
It took Ellie a while to answer, as if gathering her thoughts as well as her strength to voice them was beyond achievable for her. She finally nodded weakly, her lips finally moving to let her feeble voice out: “I tried but… couldn’t get back on the bed after I…”.
Nodding back at her to show her that she did not need to say any more, he pressed a quick peck on her forehead before gently moving around to collect her limp body in his arms and deposit her carefully onto the bed. Helping her out of her clothes was the next step, and Ellie did not complain whatsoever during the whole process, focused on keeping her eyes closed to try to ignore what this shuffling around was doing to her stomach. Once he was done, Adrian sat by her side on the edge of the bed, one hand holding hers onto his lap, the other on the side of her neck so he could brush his thumb over her cheek soothingly.  
“Sounded like you had a great night yesterday” Adrian teased, as Ellie looked at him with foggy eyes, attempting to raise a sceptical brow but failing miserably.
“Yes we had… but” she had to stop for a second, her stomach heaving dangerously, “not so much fun now”.
“Yes I can imagine”, he chuckled lightly, his eyes roaming over her features to check everything else was alright.
Lost in the peaceful silence that was filling in the room as she was gradually relaxing next to him, securely tucked in in the bedsheets, Adrian had nearly forgotten why he had initially rushed to her place. That was until he saw her eyes suddenly snap open and her brow furrow, as she broke the silence to ask: “Wait… what do you mean by ‘sounded like you had a great night’?”
Well, at least that answered his previous concern that she might not remember was she had said in her messages. He could just pretend that nothing out of the ordinary happened, and leave it at that, hoping that those words would grace her lips once more in the near future, under better circumstances. Hopefully. Except he did not want to pretend. Or could not.
“You don’t remember calling me last night?”, he asked softly, unable to hide the gleam of expectation in his eyes.
Her frown and confused gaze answered his question before her lips did. “No I….” she started, before suddenly widening her eyes in silent realisation, as glimpses of last night’s drunk endeavours resurfaced to hit her in the face. Eyes wide, she was starting to remember… bits after bits… and then all of it.
“Oh nooooo…”, she muttered, the blood somehow suddenly finding its way back to her cheeks despite the weakness of her body. If the flush of her skin and the thumping of her heart were not enough to ensure Adrian that she was now remembering everything she had said, the sheepish smile that adorned her face as she dropped her eyes to their joined hands was proof enough.
Squeezing her hand a little more tightly, he braced himself: “Ellie, I…”
But as he was about to speak, Ellie suddenly straightened up in the bed, covering her mouth with her hand and she heaved once more, her body violently reminding her that now was not the time for heart-to-heart conversations. No. Now was the time for her to pay the consequences for over indulging on G&Ts and margaritas a few hours before.
Clutching Adrian’s arm to keep herself up, she pleaded weakly, the corner of her mouth curled in a feeble smile that showed that she was admitting defeat: “Adrian, please… just… please, be my best friend right now, not the guy I just confessed my love to…. I’m gonna need you to carry me to the bathroom…”.
If Adrian was a little disappointed, he did not show it. Probably because he knew that now was clearly not the right time to discuss this. And probably because he could see the reassurance in her eyes that she was not going to take her words back. They would get to this part again eventually, there was no point in rushing things just because the alcohol had loosened her lips.
Smiling at her warmly, he simply nodded, pushing the bedsheets away to cradle her trembling body once more in his arms and carry her to the bathroom. She was right. Now was not the right time. He would tell her. Eventually. Just not right now.
 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Tag list: @adriansbiss, @itsjustwinter, @shanzay44, @purvishraick
If anyone wants to be added/removed from the tag list, let me know!
@choicesficwriterscreations​
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char-lotteral · 3 years ago
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Look I'm not one of those people who believe Kishimoto decided to have Hinata and Naruto end up in the middle part of Shippuden. I believe he decided in the very last arc but he wanted to sound smart so he said he decided earlier on. Otherwise, they obviously would have more scene together. In Shippuden, they have only three scenes together ; when Naruto came back, the pain attack and the neji death scene. That's it. In the original Naruto, they probably have less than ten canon scenes not including fillers.
So I'm sorry I'm one of those who wasn't convinced by The Last. They literally had a basic villain go after Hinata who was cringe btw (the villain). They gave Hinata op powers which she doesn't have in the novel 👀. Despite having op powers, they made her the damsel in distress. Very "The hero saves the princess" cliche. Again, to justify them being together. I mean Naruto can't differentiate his love for ramen and romantic love so how??? He was just being nice to Hinata just like he does to everyone. He stood up for her just like he does for everyone.
Don't get me started on the Sakura Sasuke relationship 🤣. Cringe. They never knew each other. The whole Sakura's love for Sasuke saved him doesn't make sense. They spent barely a year in their genin year before sasuke left. Sasuke tried to kill Naruto and Sakura multiple times. Then at the end of the war, Kishimoto tried to do the "oh they have such a deep understanding between each other" which comes off as cringey. He gets her pregnant then leaves for years. She's literally a single mom who's broke.
Every relationship in Naruto is so cringey and forced except shikatemari. Kishimoto should've focused on the main story and fixed his potholes and leave the ending open.
Naruto would not have been perfect but at least it would've been remembered for staying true to its vision but instead it's remembered for cringey relationships, dumbass villain (except pain and madara) and a story that lost its core which is a shame coz I used to love Naruto. I was inspired by its messages but now....
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OKAY LOL WAIT I ACTUALLY HAVE THIS LONG ASS RANT PREPARED XD
BUT FIRST Ive read what you said and I lowkey agree :p
HOWEVER
I DRAW THE LINE AT TONERI SLANDER. BECAUSE WHY
TONERI?? CRINGE?? THIS SEXY MOTHERFUCKER??
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LOOK AT HIS WHITE FLUFFY HAIR AND HIS CERULEAN BLUE ORBS STARING DEEPLY INTO YOUR SOUL
SAY SIKE RIGHT NOW?!#*@*#&@*
okay lol now for the juicy part click readmore and beware I shall be brutally honest so yea enjoy
I mean, Naruto in general is a mess, not just the ships if we're being realistic. Alot of plotholes, rushed endings, this and that, the w a r a r c, Kaguya, the way they rushed Boruto ehhh. Honestly, getting into Naruto is literally my biggest regret of 2020 :"DD
Im an NH shipper as you can tell by my hotmess of a blog but i fully respect your opinion and understand your point of view. I also know a bunch of nh stans who have their complaints with their development. I wish Kishi gave more attention to his female cast really, thats all I fucking ask. If he did that one single basic thing, then maybe the endgame relationships wouldnt have been an asspull and theyd be given propper screentime with their love interest, both Sakura and Hinata. The Last tbh i think the writers played it safe and stuck to the whole Naruto shounen vibe thingy, so im not surprised it was plotted that way. Typical cliché shounen movie.
But does that bother me? No! The Last was a mess, their development was shit, they definitely needed more screentime but hey at the end of the day theyre cute as fuck, we have that kiss scene, flirting scenes, a shit ton of official art, three kids, Seiki's gif :33 and a whole ass arc for their wedding all that for just a shounen anime so eh. Compensates for it i guess xD theyre not toxic, unhealthy or whatnot. Theyre wholesome, soft and vanilla as fuck and exactly what i need in my hectic life rn. No drama, just two kind souls who are adorable as heck and theyre dynamic means so much to me and I will love them until i shall leave this earth.
Anon, im not even gonna waste my time and defend their development because i think it sucked too xD but if you wanna know why i love them so so so soooo much, Id be more than willing to tell you :33
Sasuke and Sakura on the other hand eeeehhhh i can see why people like them. Sasuke's hot, he's your typical hot bad boy aad Sakura's hot and pretty too. Basic blue and pink trope. Aside from their canon interactions, fans have all the opportunity to play around with their dynamic but for me, its just sooo basic and so hetero and can easily appeal to any 16 yr old teenage girl, no wonder it has an active fanbase on twt and---- AM I MAKING ANY SENSE? AHDBAJJE LIKE ITS SO-- BASIC, your usual bad boy x pretty girl trope that you get to read in YA and coming of age novels. Not only that, but going back to canon, they have too many negative interactions for me to like them together :p The least Sakura can do is put down her own foot and yell at him for not contacting them for god knows how long. I also dont like how he always gets easily forgiven >=[[. I mean at least He's compensating as a dad good for him but ehhhh i still dont like him and Sakura together :v And im not falling for that "Sakura is the reason why Sasuke isnt lonely anymore" because thats NARUTO AHHH. Sasuke said that Multiple times. HE LIGHTS A FIRE INSIDE OF ME. HES MY SUN. MY ONE AND ONLY FRIEND. LIEK?? THATS NARUTOOO romantic or not, Naruto was the reason for his not so lonely existence anymore smh >=[[
Sasuke almost murdered her and Naruto and made their lives a living hell but hey its all good!! He's my best friend and Sakura loves him!! So set him freeee into the worldddd~~
Sasuke left his family without even simply contacting them but can easily contact Naruto through a hawk but hey thats fine! His and Sakura's feelings are connected afterall! Sasuke gave her a ring and said thank you! Who cares about leaving your family. She loves him and he loves her so yey!!! All is forgiven :D
DID I MENTION SASUKE ALMOST MUREDERED HIS OWN DAUGHTER AND HE WASNT CALLED OUT FOR THAT@*#&@??!?#,*@#,#
Sasuke gets too many life points this isnt fair >=[[ But tbh he's nerfed so bad in Boruto manga and anime power wise. Like in that time travel arc and the manga. The rinnegan kunai thing was still so funny to me even if it was Borushiki. I just idk its so funny to me lmaoo
OKAY WHAT ELSE. I dont even know any more. Im tired of complaining about Naruto and just when Ive finally gone a little bit away from Naruto, Hinata fucking pulls me in again 😩 she has me on chokehold pls send help. Watch castlevania!!! and one piece!!!! ten times better than this anime about a loud blonde boi who wants to be president. Trust me
overall, i dont fully agree but i lowkey agree i guess. I do respect your opinion tho :))
EXCEPT WHEN YOU CALLED TONERI CRINGE. HOW DARE YOU CALL THAT SEXY MF CRINGEY---
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exosmutfactory · 5 years ago
Text
For (Your) Entertainment
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 gif not mine 🌹
❥ Fuckk it’s 1am, I’m feeling hot all over and this damn smut is finally done but I;M FEELING ATTACKED
— Pairing: You & Baekhyun
— Genre/AU: smut,
— Word Count: 3k
— Rating: 18+ (M)
— [ Contains: The use of toys (and a bonus of blindfolds&ties coz why the fuck not) ]
❥ Let’s go
ღ♥ღ♥ღ♥ ღ♥ღ♥ღ♥ ღ♥ღ♥ღ♥
You hate to admit how easy it was for your friend to convince you to come out here tonight. A new club-club being the codename for what this place actually entails-has opened up on a quiet corner of your town. And her being ever the extrovert, she was quick to catch a whiff of the news. Seriously, it just flipped its entrance sign 2 days ago and she’s already tugging you over the threshold by the arm.
“Come on! We need to get good seats.”
Rolling your eyes you speed up the pace of your low-heeled clad feet. You being 167cm without any aid of heels being the perfect excuse for the black, 3-inch lifesavers.
The interior of the building switches from the pink neon sign packed entryway to a red velvet coated open area. The dim lights and sensual music alone has a shiver going down your spine.
Your friend smirks at you, “Nice right?” You nod and her smirk widens, “Things are just getting started.”
After a quick trip to the bar for a matching pair of explicitly-named drinks, you are led to a sitting area in front of a stage. Your eyes roam around as you take a seat on a comfortable red chair; noting how the stage reminds you of the one you’ve seen often in your favorite movie.
“Seems like they took inspiration from Burlesque,” You mumble.
Your friend–of course–with her super hearing catches your words, “Oh trust me.” She purrs crossing her legs with a lazily stir of her drink, “This is much better.”
You hum noncommittally, taking small sips of your own fruity beverage just as the lights dim further. Soon others join you; some taking the leftover front row seats (how your friend scored them, you don’t even want to know) while a rowdy bunch sits directly behind you. Seeming to enjoy talking loud directly in your ear until a tall man walks out on stage.
“Good evening everyone.” He greets grinning when the crowd swoons in response. You won’t deny that he’s handsome with his beautiful bronze skin and confident posture. His constant flirting with the crowd is a little much for your tastes though. You catch your friend watching him without blinking.
“Hey,” You whisper nudging her, “Careful. You’re drooling.”
“What!?” She yelps carefully dabbing at the corners of her red lips.
“Kidding!” You laugh loudly. Luckily the lights dim again before she can retaliate.
But oh is karma prepared to make you take back your words.
Another tall man walks out on stage; adoring a black near see-through shirt and tight leather pants with pearls lining from his hips to the inside of his matching boots. But that isn’t what catches your attention the most. No. It’s the sexily disheveled black hair dangling into piercing brown eyes. Dark orbs seemingly focused in your direction.
You curl your hand tight around your glass. And as the performance begins, you wish you had another three with you.
Slow rhythmic, booming bass fills the air; the aura in the room switching from curiosity and excited chatters to barely concealed gasps and hushed whispers.
You’d join in if your own mouth wasn’t running dry; eyes not wavering for a moment from his body. His every movement drowning you farther into the art of his seduction. He runs his hand over his body in the most hypnotizing of ways, maintaining eye contact with a few lucky women in the crowd. Until his eyes land on yours as he gets on the floor; grinding against the cane as if he was made for it.
You don’t even try to conceal your shock; it is written all over your face as he throws you a little smirk, turning around with the cane across his back just to roll his body in the most sinful of ways. And when you think he will be merciful once he gets off that floor, he’s confidently rolling his body in your direction; cupping his hand behind his ear as the room fills with more screams. Sounds you can barely hear over the racing of your heart and the vibrations of the music under your feet.
When the performance is nearing the end he struts over to the front of the stage; directing an aggressive two-finger kiss in your direction. One last devilish smirk is thrown your way before he’s exiting the stage.
“Well?” Your friend inquires turning to you.
You end up crossing your own legs as the lights come on; clearing your throat before downing the rest of your drink. “That was…” Hot. Sexy. Way too intense. “Good.” You settle on; glad that you decided to wear shorts under your wine skater dress tonight.
“Good?” She scoffs, “Yeah right. I saw how you were looking at him. And how he was eyeing you.” She smirks nudging me. “Think you were his favorite?”
“S-Shut up.” You near whine concealing your face with your long wavy hair.
“Fine fine.” She chuckles raising her hand to ruffle your hair before uncharacteristically pausing. Before you can ask what’s wrong she’s whispering, “Don’t look now but I think your dancer is coming this way.”
Giving her a panicked look you part your lips, “Wha-”
“Excuse me.” A warm, deep voice reaches your ears.
You take a deep breath, sharing one more look with your friend before looking over your shoulder.
It is, in fact, the very same man who displayed a hypnotizing performance mere minutes ago. Still in his all-black outfit with his hair just the tiniest bit damp and tousled as if hastily rubbed by a towel. The shine of sweat on his chest caught by the lightning with every breath he takes.
Hot. You can’t help thinking again, quickly reeling yourself back in, “Yes?” You inquire politely.
“May I have a bit of your time?” His eyes stay on yours; a flicker of something dark in his orbs until he blinks again.
“Oh um,” You could damn near die of nerves at that moment, looking to your friend for help, “Actually-”
“Oh! I forgot,” She exclaims; rummaging through her purse. “I am supposed to meet up with Sandra after this. You don’t mind if I leave right, love?” Her mischievous eyes land on you.
It takes everything in you not to simultaneously gape at her and wring her neck. “Um…” You hesitate, feeling a little fearful when she gives you a warning look. “No, that’s alright.” You reply in a high voice.
She smiles, “Good!” Taking her phone out she taps on it a few times before pressing it to her ear; standing up. “I’ll leave you to it then, have a good night!” With a wink she’s headed off towards the entrance, quickly getting lost in the crowd.
With a gulp, you turn back to the stunning man before you; patiently waiting on an answer, “Y-Yes.” You smile, “Sure.” Your eyes fall on the beautiful hand he holds out to you.
“May I take you somewhere?” He quirks a delicate brow, “I’d like to show you something a bit too…private out here.”
Oh. You gulp. That’s why she brought me here. Your heart races even more as he keeps his dark brown eyes steady on you; feeling a blush crawl up the back of your neck as his intentions set in. “Yes.” You breathe, placing your palm in his warm one.
He smiles stepping back, waiting on you to stand before leading you further into the club. “Oh,” He pauses, silently calling for your eyes to meet his as you stop taking in the velvety walls of the building. “I’m Baekhyun.” He says with the sweetest eye smile, a big contrast with his sexy appearance that does nothing but makes you flush further as you quietly utter your own name.
“Well then,” Your name rolls off his tongue is the prettiest way as he leans down to kiss the back of your hand; sending a jolt down your body when his eyes meet yours as he firmly sucks. “Pleasure to meet you.”
If he doesn’t stop being so sensual you are going to be a puddle on this damn floor before you even reach your destination.
Thankfully the raven whisks you even further into the place; hand securely holding onto yours as you venture down relatively dark hallways. After a few twists and turns, you start to wonder why the hell this club is so damn big until a barely audible but completely recognizable noise reaches your sensitive ears.
Baekhyun looks over his shoulder to check up on you; smiling apologetically at your flustered state even as amusement shines in his eyes, “Sorry bout that.”
Before you can reply, a certain red door at the end of the hallway catches your eye. It differentiates from all the black ones lined up to the left and right. You can’t help but gulp as Baekhyun leads you right to it; fishing a key out of his pocket.
“Pardon me if I’m rude,” He starts as he opens the door; holding it for you as you meekly cross the threshold, “But is this your first time?”
Too busy analyzing the dimly lit room covered in various shades of deep maroons and pitch-black furniture, you turn back to him with red cheeks, “No.”
Baekhyun walks over to you. “Then there must be something,” Gently grabbing your hand he starts kissing from your wrist to your shoulder; thoroughly leaving little sucks and swirls of his tongue over your heated skin that leave you trembling in need, “You haven’t done before?”
Taking a deep shaky breath you nod a little, wanting to slap yourself for how hot his kisses just made you. Since when did a man make you want to drop to your knees so damn much?? In a new club your friend just left you in?? Either you’re that crazy or that desperate.
Noticing the conflict in your eyes, Baekhyun smiles in a reassuring manner, “Tell me about it?”
With another deep breath, you agree; excitement running through your veins as he reaches back to lock the door; keeping his eyes on you while biting down on that tempting bottom lip of his, “Bed?”
Instead of a verbal response, you give in to your instincts; grabbing him by the collar of his shirt and smashing your lips to his. Thankfully Baekhyun is quick to return the gesture; expertly sucking and licking the seam of your lips as he walks you back to the bed. The moment your knees hit it, you carefully crawl back on the bed, Baekhyun following your lead until you reach the headboard.
Pulling back, Baekhyun rubs his cool hands up your heated legs; making you shiver as he parts your thighs. His eyes run over your form before they meet yours, “What do you want?” He leans down, nibbling on your ear and pulling a moan from you as he lightly brushes his hand over your inner thigh, “What’s your fantasy?”
“I…” Already feeling breathless at his teasing touches, you try your hardest to remember the thing you’ve been the most curious about for a while. Something that, arguably, is the most flustering yet arousing thing you could think of, “I’ve never used…toys before.”
Baekhyun pulls back with a look of surprise, “Never? Not even a vibrator?” A glint twinkles in his eyes as you shake his head; his lick of lips and another breathtaking kiss shooting another wave of heat between your legs.
“Stay here,” He demands before climbing off the bed.
You keep your gaze pointed towards the ceiling, asking yourself if you’re ready to experience this. Are you ready to melt at the hands of a very capable stranger?
Fuck yes you are.
You jolt a little as Baekhyun makes his way back onto the bed; eyeing the tie and blindfold in his hand and an average-sized red box at the foot of the bed. He runs a hand through his hair as he hovers over you again; meeting your eyes as he asks softly, “Do you trust me?”
Once again glancing at the items in his hand, you utter a quiet, “Yes,” Before he’s putting his lips back on yours.
Baekhyun takes his time in undressing you both; pulling off your dress that doesn’t allow a bra and unbuttoning his shirt at an appetizing but unbreakable pace with the building ache between your legs. You gasp a little at the sudden touch on your clothed folds, looking at him as he hums in approval.
“You’re soaked,” He mumbles with a smile, slowly pulling your last article of clothing down your legs. You can probably guess the sight he has when he parts your needy thighs, rubbing his thumbs on your hips as you drip even more at his stare.
Humming again his eyes meet yours, “May I?” He asks just as he’s rubbing his fingers over your drenched folds. Honestly, what does he think your answer will be? You can’t think straight with his touch so close yet so far to where you need it the most.
“Yes,” You breathe for what feels like the hundredth time tonight, laying still for him as he gently ties your wrists to the headboard and wraps the blindfold around you. The loss of both senses heightens the ones that you have left. And when his lips are suddenly wrapping around your nipple, you can do nothing but moan; arching into his touch and crying out when he bites down. Baekhyun hums deeply, soothing it with gentle licks that have your eyes rolling back; your back arching even more as his wet fingers play with the other one.
You jump a bit at the sudden buzz in the air, wondering what it is for a fleeting moment until vibrations are pressed against your clit.
“Good?” Baekhyun mumbles against your chest.
“Mmhm-” You can’t help lifting your hips as he presses the vibrator harder to your clit, moaning louder as he sucks hard and tugs on your sensitive nipples. Your arms twitch with want to tug on his hair. And you’re damn near losing your mind when he starts circling the vibrator around your nub, “F-Fuck.” Before you can even warn him, you’re cumming hard; thighs continuing to shake as he doesn’t let up.
“Good girl,” He presses a kiss to your nipple before pulling away entirely; only his bare thighs touching your trembling ones.
You take a few deep breaths to calm down, whimpering at the feeling of something sliding between your folds; rubbing your oversensitive clit and teasing over your entrance. Your lips part in a silent moan as it’s sliding inside of you.
Baekhyun moves it in and out at a moderate pace, letting you roll your hips as he starts kissing on your neck; finding your sensitive spot within seconds. You sigh in pleasure, keep up that movement until he tilts the dildo a bit; pulling a loud gasp from your lips and making your legs shut when it brushes your gspot.
Baekhyun tsks and parts your thighs, but keeps the dildo still. A few minutes go by as you pant and clench in vain around the toy nicely stretching your walls; growing concerned when he makes no noise or movement. And then, just as you are about to ask if he’s okay, he’s spreading your thighs wider and sucking harshly on your clit; slamming the dildo directly into your gspot.
You can’t help but cry out as you suddenly cum again; whole body shaking as Baekhyun slowly helps you ride it out. But when he’s sliding it out of you, your body still craves for something more. The vibrator and dildo felt amazing but you need more.
Swallowing hard you part your lips, “Baek-”
His lips crash to yours; catching your surprised scream as he slams into you, bottoming out just to do it again. “You look so-fuck-” He hisses, snapping his hips harder, “You look so good tied up like this.”
You can only moan in reply, imagining him over you; pounding into your walls and biting hard on his lip. Sweat dripping down his body in that sinfully hot way that you love. “B-Baekhyun.” You squint at the light suddenly coming back to your eyes, blinking to clear your vision until you see him just as you pictured.
Feeling your eyes on him, Baekhyun slows down; rolling his hips just as he did on stage. Loud uncontrollable moans fall from your lips as he finds your gspot again; another orgasm minutes away from unraveling in your trembling form when he slides a hand down his body and between your legs.
“Fuck.” You breathe, yanking on your restraints when he brushes his thumb over your clit. Your face feeling completely flushed as he looks at you with dark eyes; bangs slightly covering his brown orbs.
“You’ll be a good girl for me, hmm?” Baekhyun slowly licks his lips, smirking at you in such a devilish manner, “Cum all over my cock as I fill you up with my cum?”
You hiss as you clench around him, lifting your hips to meet his every movement, “You sure you can make me cum again?” You daringly ask even as you feel your whole body quivering in anticipation.
The smirk falls off Baekhyun’s face as a darker look forms in his eyes; his hands pressing your hips to the bed. You look up at your lover with a gulp as he breaks out of character.
“We have all night baby girl.” He chuckles darkly, throwing your leg over his shoulder before thrusting so roughly into you the bed creaks and slammed against the wall, “Plenty of time to remind you who this pussy belongs to.”
————
I hope this turned out okay! I took a long ass time to get to the good stuff I know smh 🙈�� let me know in my ask box how you feel about this if you want dhdgfhdhgk I’m running back to sleep now 🌹🌹 BYE
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jezmmart · 5 years ago
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Chamomile Comic Trivia #8
#36 Magical
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I just really wanted to do a good christmassy-feeling comic, especially since this upload date was going to fall on Christmas Eve. I actually started with the aesthetics of the scene that I wanted to draw and remember spending an entire work shift figuring out what the scene (and eventual joke) for the comic was actually going to be beyond just “Brianna and Chamomile are on a bridge being kind of melancholic on christmas eve but it’ll be pretty and heartwarming somehow coz Christmas Special vibes!!!”
#37 Year
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Brianna’s outfit here comes from this pin-up that predates the comic. This concept that the two of them spend new years dressing up in fancy clothes and eating takeaway in front of the TV together was just a random idea (which later gets clarified as what they were doing here in next year’s New Years Eve comic). The joke gets a bit silly when Cammie starts mentioning the mundane events of comic #1 but I needed to phrase it in a way that would make sense for anyone reading without having access to the publication dates of the comics.
#38 Huff
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This remains one of my go-to sample comics and a personal favourite, I love to draw Cammie’s sportswear look (which originated from my sports bra pin-up series I did) and the joke is a really nice combination of verbal, visual, character-driven and potentially-audience-relatable that I’m really happy with.
#39 Yet
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A bunch to say about this one! Obviously it came from my frustrations with customers while working retail. It was tough to put Cammie in the role of said annoying customers, but it seemed like a simple opportunity to make her a bit more flawed as a character.  Her school uniform comes directly from this pin-up (though said pin-up depicts her as an adult wearing it as fancy dress).
Anyway, other than those bits, we have my childhood comic character Frogy making his first inevitable cameo in the comic on lil’ Cammie’s t-shirt:
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Cammie’s credit card number is the numbers you’d type on an old phone if you were typing the phrase THIS CARD ISNT REAL. I’m pretty sure the Sort Code and Account number are just random numbers though, I didn’t make a mental note of what they mean anyhow:
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In addition, her bank is “LA-BONK” which was the name of the very badly drawn bank in Episode 7 of my other comic, Phantasm Dyad, which ITSELF was a reference to the fact that my friends and I used to find the French for “the bank” - “la banque” funny sounding coz, yeah, it sounds like “bonk” which is a silly word in English:
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Cammie’s ID Card is very hard to read in the upload comic, but it reveals her birthday as 30th June (which is the date I first drew her and her canon birthday) and her last name as... McThighStrong?
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This is absolutely not canon - just an in-joke with my online friend Aina, who inspired me to name her Chamomile in a conversation once (this is back when I had only drawn her once as a random one-off girl with big hips who likes to drink tea):
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The joke names regarding waist, hip, thigh etc was based around the aforementioned large thighs she had (compared to my usual anatomy style and most of my existing OCs anyway).
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Of course, I have to take most of the credit for the name, she might have come up with Camomile but I came up with the brilliant idea to use the “Ch” spelling variant.
#40 Job
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Annnnd this is just a simple one trivia-wise. If I wanted Cammie to be a nice, relatable character I needed to finally answer the question of “does she even have a job or does she just walk around doing amusing things all day every day without any money concerns”.  The answer was the latter thanks to coasting on handouts from her parents, so it was time to shift her over to the former. Also... I wanted to make more retail work vent comics + write what you know, so her getting a retail job was kind of inevitable.
[More Chamomile Comic Trivia]
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problematic-camren · 7 years ago
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Thoughts on Down
This is a long-ass shit, and I’m not forcing you to read. Also, please be reminded that this is just MY opinion. We all have different opinions, and I’m here to simply share my thoughts, and not to convince you to change yours. So please don’t go to my ask pushing your opinion. I already heard yours. I woke up to a bunch of “asks” and I already know that some don’t like it, while some do.
My initial reaction:
• why is this so auto-tuned? Okay, Dinah’s voice sounds like smooth warm caramel on top of a sundae. Why is this so basic? Lauren’s adlibs tho! Why are the lyrics so generic? Oooh WFH melody… It’s gonna be a bop! Wait why is the chorus so blandly repetitive? But it’s not that bad. Why do they sound so alike?
• and picture me with my earphones on listening to the first verse, pre-hook, chorus and shit with a pensive look on my face, and disappointment running through my head like damn I wanted more…
But then Gucci Mane came in, (and I know I’m the minority in this one), but for me, the first authentic reaction the song elicited from me was his part.
Why? Because his part was so off and out of nowhere that it took me out of the rut I was in. Like imagine a flat line where the song was just monotonous, like a car cruising on a smooth freeway (not bad, but also kind of boring) but then you run into a pothole and you get jerked off your stupor…
That’s what gucci’s part was for me. A tiny spike on that flat line. A deviation that held my attention. I’m not saying it’s amazing. I’m saying that the grating sound of the bass and the randomness of it was what made me smile while listening to it. I’m not even exaggerating when I say that I was smiling the whole time I was listening to that weird bass with a tiny bit of goosebumps on my skin because I knew then that I COULD like Down without lying to myself. It was the only thing that caught my attention, aside from Lauren’s adlibs (which, girl, I wish she did more. I live for Lauren going offffff)
Don’t get me wrong though, I’m so done with these collabs with rappers, like I wanted to hear them alone, like they did with Boss (idc if you say that one is trash lmao, Boss is a bop for me. I fucking love that shit 😂), but if they really have to collab with rappers, I wish it wasn’t Gucci. Maybe Chance, or Migos damn…
But if it were up to me, I wish they would have collabed with female rappers. I still am salty that NTKG wasn’t utilized much. A missed opportunity with Missy Elliott like bitch you had to release TMG over NTKG? NTKG was at least more authentic with the sound it’s trying to project. It was old school and it owned it. Like Voicemail was reminiscent of 90’s bops and not lacing it with today’s trendy dancehall or tropical vibe. It has its own sound, and not a mix of everything generic we hear today where we hear a song and we automatically hear the edm producers more than the artist.
But OMG I digress, sorry.
So yeah, DOWN…
So after my initial reaction, I gave it a couple more listen, and then I watched the live performance, then I slept, then I woke up the next day and I listened to the audio a couple more times, watched the live several more, and here’s my conclusion:
• Down is that kind of a summer bop which grows on you. It’s not a bad song. It’s simplistic but also season-friendly. It’s probably what the label insisted on as their first release.
The reason why it probably feels lacking for me, aside from its repetitiveness, is that maybe it lacks another verse. It’s shorter than WI and WFH so it feels incomplete. There must be a reason for it. It could really be just a teaser.
• at this point in my 5h-stanning life, I’m not even expecting anything mind-blowing. All I want is for 5H to slay the charts, because this should be their era. They seem genuinely happy now and my god after everything they’ve been through (label shit and all), ALL FIVE OF THEM deserve our unwavering support.
• Sure, Down isn’t what I expected. Yes, I wanted more. I wanted more lyrics. I wanted a kickass sound. But, idk man, after several repeats, I think it’s a good enough bop.
• with regards to the vocals, I still hate the auto-tuned shit. I get that maybe they’re finally utilizing Lauren’s range, but I prefer that they don’t auto tune much because I could barely hear her rasp (which was still obvious in her live performance, despite the higher tone she’s using).
Maybe they’re doing it on purpose, making them sound the same as a symbol of their new sound’s “cohesiveness”, but I prefer old 5h where their voices are uniquely different.
• and I’m not even complaining that it sounds like WFH. I don’t have a problem with an artist using a tried and tested formula for ONE of their album’s single. It’s meant to hook the audience. It gives them that familiar sound which could make a NON-FAN recognize their older hits and draw them to the new one. Just because they said “NEW ERA” doesn’t mean that they should change their ENTIRE sound. There’s always that one or two singles that are meant to hook the general public. It’s a constant compromise a mainstream artist makes with their label.
(I mean, The Chainsmokers basically generate the same sound over and over and they’re charting as if they created music. And no, I’m not a big fan of the chainsmokers.
Point is, re-using WFH is not something unheard of. It’s a business move.)
You really can’t please everybody. Because when Lady Gaga released an album that felt authentic for her, some people criticized it and kept saying they wanted the old “Bad Romance” Gaga. When Lorde released her new single, Green Light, her hipster fanbase called her a sell-out and didn’t like that she’s deviated from her “sound” to be more mainstream and I was like bitch can’t an artist explore a different side of her artistry?
And on the flip side, can’t an artist use their old sound? My point is, Down was produced by the same people who made WFH for a reason. They are playing safe. They wanted a single that would generate enough attention like their previous ones did. Then maybe, just maybe, their next singles which probably showcase their authentic sound and lyrics will have as much impact since now people are paying attention. Because no matter how much we want them to be authentic, they’re still a girl group under a greedy ass label who needs them to maintain what their idea of a girl group music and image should be..
And while Down is not something I’m particularly excited about, it’s starting to get stuck in my head, and I don’t hate it. It’s a light summery chill song that’s good to play with your friends while sipping on your drinks by the pool. It is what it was supposed to be.
I get it, I was disappointed too. Down is a downer. But I’m not gonna judge the whole album with one single yet. I’m gonna wait.
This is why I wrote this one before Down was released:
https://problematic-camren.tumblr.com/post/161338803713/5h3
Because I knew that I wasn’t expecting much from their music. I sure hope for more, definitely, BUT stanning 5H isn’t always about their music.
And just because I don’t like a few of their songs, doesn’t mean they don’t deserve my support.
I’m supporting 5h because they represent girls who are not a standard definition of what society thinks a girl should look like or how they should act like. They symbolize us. They showed us that one can achieve their dreams through hard work, and while they have been mistreated before (by their label and by fans alike) they still kept their heads up high, with grace and maturity, and kept on spreading love and inspiration, and they kept on smiling even if their hearts were breaking. They kept striving to be the best they could be, and it’s inspiring. And to see genuine warmth from these pop stars, their love and appreciation for their fans, is something that makes me wanna stan them forever. That’s why even if i really don’t like their music, I’d still keep on stanning them, because what they shared to us, the representation they gave us, the beauty and poise they all showed us, man, even if they fucking screeched for an entire album, I’ll be fuucking putting that on loop and still support their asses.
And I know it’s blind support, but I knew what I was getting into when I started supporting 5h. I wasn’t a pop person before this, I knew I won’t love their music so much. I stan them because I like them, plain and simple.
And I know it’s different for everybody. It’s all just a matter of preferences. Some could unstan just coz they don’t like the song, and that’s totally okay. We’re free to stan or unstan whoever we want. But like I said, it’s just one song. Let’s wait for the other singles and the album.
Ideally, I would love for them to show us everything they have as artists. This is their chance to go big. They have so much potential and I would have liked to see it shine while they’re still in the group. I want the brand Fifth Harmony to leave a lasting mark in this industry. I want them to be on the same spot as TLC or SG or DC. I want them to legit deserve their title.
And Down is not it. But guess what? Down is just one single. I’m gonna wait patiently for the rest of their stuff. I ONLY NEED THAT ONE CLASSIC HIT I’VE BEEN CRAVING FOR SINCE I STARTED LISTENING TO THEM. ONE CLASSIC SONG THAT WOULD STILL BE PLAYED GENERATIONS LATER BECAUSE IT’S JUST SO DAMN RELATABLE AND HEARTFELT.
That’s all I want. And I hope I’ll find that in 5H3.
Yes, Down is empty.
But I won’t unstan just because of one song. We can be disappointed (as I sure was), but I think that 5H is worth more than a few musical disappointments.
💁🏻
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newmonk · 5 years ago
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UK TRIP
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Day 1 // 18th July 2019
- Landed at London Gatwick —> Switched two trains to get to Waterloo —> Walked down Webber Street to figure out exactly where it is - 130, Webber Street: My home for the next two weeks! - Went to the supermarket, got basic supplies, beers & a local SIM - Walk around Union Street, found a chill park - Chose to have dinner at Bala Baya, instead of Gordon Ramsay’s Union Street, because I don’t do mainstream stuff. LOL, kidding. I found Bala Baya’s menu & aesthetic more attractive. - Shopped for more supplies from TESCO at Southwark - Walked back home - Didn’t do much, just trying to get a hang of the city & people
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Day 2 // 19th July 2019
- Train from Waterloo —> John Wood's - Starts raining as I walk towards the coveted Lord’s Cricket Ground - Met Dudeja outside Lord’s & started our Lord’s tour - Went to the great hall, merchandise store, the dressing rooms - the place where Ganguly took off & flung his jersey during the Natwest 2002 finals - Bus from Lord’s —> Oxford Circus - Walked around Oxford Street, its a shopping freak show. Since I’m averse to shopping, I didn’t like this street, but the kind of consumerism that exists in London is intense - Went for lunch to The Chipping Forecast: Fish & Chips, Avocado salad & Guinness stout was consumed - Followed by desert at Chin Chin - Met Deep in the evening & we went to Soho Theatre to watch comedy show, which I didn’t know would go on to inspire me to such an extent: DEMI LARDNER - Walked around Piccadilly Circle, China Town, Leicester Square, the popular places of London. Too much fan-fare around these places, very commercial, whereas I prefer the quiet, quaint lanes. Anyway, I couldn’t go to London for the first time & not visit these places, they’re too  iconic too skip! - Walked around the Soho again, had a very good beer while walking - Dinner at Japes Pizzeria with Simon, Dudeja & Deep. Their pizzas were amazing! - Train from Oxford Circus —> Waterloo —> Walked home
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Day 3 // 20th July 2019
- Walk from home —> BFI IMAX Waterloo —> Walk down to Tate Modern - MIND EXPLODE at Tate Modern, must’ve spent 5 hours easily, just absorbing - Bus to Nando’s —> Walk to BFI IMAX Waterloo - Watched Lion King at BFI (UK’s largest IMAX screen) - Tried a Ben & Jerry’s ice-cream for the first time. It was nice, normal - Walk back home from BFI - Reached home, then stepped out again - Spotted Andrew Scott outside the Old Vic Theatre! O.M.G. YES - Met Sumit, Sam & Dudeja & The London Eye around midnight, their keys fell into a gutter outside the London Eye & we struggled to get it, Sam & Sumit wrote a note on paper which had their name and contact number & put it through the grill - We went to a supermarket to get magnets since we thought we'll use that to pull out the keys from the gutter, but the shop-owner(from the subcontinent) warned us not to do such stuff, since it would come across as extremely suspicious. - Walked with Dudeja around Union Street - We saw hordes of people line up outside a train bridge, figured there was some underground boxing match happening there. - Walk back home.
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Day 4 // 21st July 2019
- Took a train to North Greenwhich, was sent back to Canary Wharf, cozy the observatory is closer from there - SRK’s 'Challa' was shot at Canary Wharf - Heron Qauy-DLR Walk - Got off at Cutty Stark - Walk in Greenwich was amazing, it's a beautiful area - Walked to the observatory, crossing Cafe Rouge, Greenwich theatre & the huge park - Touched and stood on the prime meridian line(EXACT vertical centre of the Earth) & walked around the observatory - Walked down to the National Maritime Museum and saw some cool naval stuff (I didn't know that museums would fascinate me so much!) - Walk through Cutty Stark, bought a couple of vinyl LPs for myself although I don't have a player -_- It's a long term plan, sometimes you get accessories for something that you don't have & that motivates you to get the actual product, right? *I hope it's not just me* - Walked the Thames underground tunnel, it was quite cold down there - Walked across multiple parks to reach Isle of Dogs, (the name of this area inspired Wes Anderson to create a fictional film) which was quite disappointing, since I was expecting some film references, alas, One shouldn't expect too much. I didn't even find a direction symbol or a milestone that read 'Isle of Dogs' - Train back to Canary Wharf --> Switch at Green Park --> Piccadilly Line --> Hyde Park Corner - Met Dudeja, Deep & Simon at Hyde Park - We had a couple of beers, spoke, played catch & frisbee'd - Took a bus to Original Lahore, we were joined by Upmanyu there for dinner - Mediocre food at Original Lahore - Upmanyu walked us around the area, it was the same area where he stayed during his previous visit - Walked to Baker Street & saw Sherlock Holmes house. 221B - Took the bus home.
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Day 5 // 22nd July 2019
- Started the day late. Did laundry, dishes, following up with clients regarding work back in Bombay. I was glad I didn’t carry my laptop along!  - Walk to Southwark - Train to Victoria Station - Oxford Tube bus from Victoria Coach - Chill bus ride, reached the majestic city of Oxford - Walked around Oxford University, Christ Church College, by the river that flows through the city - I think I ate the best burger that I've ever eaten at Oxford. It was a smoked beef burger at this restaurant 'Head to the River' - The bartender mocked me coz I said 'I want beer beer'. These two guys made a quick gag, and went on to ask me if I wanted any 'Food Food' 'Water Water' & later apologised for their behaviour by saying they're 'Sorry Sorry' and 'Immature Immature'. I liked the dry humor, that’s my thing too. - Long walk by the river - Slept under a tree at the park, saw ducks, kayaks - Walked around the city for about 2-3 hours - Gelato Ice cream at George & Co - Saw a man in a hat & suit entertaining a group of kids - The architecture here was different from London. - Went to Sainsbury, found lactose free milk - Caught the bus back home --> Oxford Tube --> Victoria Coach London --> Bus no #211 from Victoria to Waterloo - Walk home - Made a cheese sandwich & drank that lactose free milk - Spoke to Varun for long & slept.
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Day 6 // 23rd July 2019
- Walk to Southwark --> Train to King's Cross --> Walk across the street to St. Pancras - Train to Brighton with Dudeja - Walk to Brighton Beach through the lanes of the city - Chill at the Brighton Pier - Ate fish & Chips + Calamari on the pier. - Walk down the pebble beach - We’d planned for this, so I was carrying a sheet, we spread it and soaked in the sun for a couple of hours - Took a couple of dips in the water(English Channel) - Beer + Truffle Chips at the beach - Sid played an FKJ playlist & we slept on the beach - Walked ahead to the Naturist Beach Park, saw a beautiful lady there! - Shot 'Otherside' pilot with Dudeja - Started walking to get water & stumbled upon a bunch of boys playing cricket; they were from Afghanistan. We were elated and ended up playing cricket with them for over an hour, made friends with them. One of those boys aped Bumrah’s action to the T, he was a fan! - Walked back on the Brighton promenade, saw the axe throwing booth - Back at Brighton station, we took the train to London - Got off at Southwark & walked home
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Day 7 // 24th July 2019
- Walk to Borough Market - Ate pork wrap from Hobbs & gobbled an entire box of strawberries - Walk to London Bridge, walked the tower bridge - Bus to Potter Fields garden/park - Walk at Hay's Galleria (I think the architechture of Hiranandani in Powai is heavily inspired by this place) - London Bridge Underground station --> Train to Camden - Walked around the entirety of Camden - Found 'The World's End' pub and had their house beer 'The World's End Ale', one word: OUTSTANDING! The bartender & I spoke about Edgar Wright and his amazing films! - Bus to Shoreditch - Walked across the Grafiiti streets and reached a fine dine Burmese restaurant: Lahpet (with Dudeja - his reccomendation!) - Pork gravy + Rice with Prawn dim sums on the side - Walking beer from Shoreditch, walked around Shoreditch while sipping on the beer - Went to another restaurant 'Bird' and got Fried chicken parcelled - Bus to Tower Bridge - Walked tower bridge at night - Sat by the Thames and finished that fried chicken with blue cheese sauce! Blue Cheese FTW! - Walked back home through Borough Market.
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Day 8 // 25th July 2019
-  Saw a priesthood ceremony in a church - Walked to the Imperial War Museum, intensely intrigued by the history behind World War II & The Holocaust. What a museum, must visit! - Walk back home - Lunch at Borough Market (Pork Hot Dog) + Gelato (Pistachio) - Train to West Hampstead - Met Sumit Anand, Sam & Dudeja, we booked our tickets to Cardiff (Wales). I also booked my tickets to Edinburgh (Scotland) - Train back home - Chilled on the terrace, had a couple of drinks - Walked to Tower Bridge & by the Thames with Maitry - Chilling again on the terrace, even Dudeja joined, spoke about Indian politics, because... how could we not!
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Day 9 // 26th July 2019
- Leave for London Victoria with Dudeja in the morning - Missed the bus by 2 minutes, had to book the next bus which was after an hour :( - Walked to Victoria Street for breakfast - Beautiful breakfast at Granger & Co. Oh my god, the scrambled egg there is heavenly - Got on to our bus, headed to Cardiff - Checked in to our hostel the Riverside, one of the better ones, recommend it! - We headed out, but the city seemed a bit slow that day - Pizza & Beer at The Gatekeeper - Walked around the city, deserted, empty vibe, we thought we chose wrongly - Went to the Roald Dahl park - Took a bus back to the hotel, played mini pool in the courtyard & then slept like logs
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Day 10 // 27th July 2019 - Breakfast at the hostel, our locker with passports got locked, so we had to break the lock to get our stuff out! With the hostel’s permission of course, they only got us a bolt cutter - Checkout & walk to Bute Park - Experienced one of the fun-nest event ever, that too randomly, we stumbled upon it! The Homeless Football World Cup & loved the vibe of it! Saw the opening ceremony + 1st match Denmark beat Wales (Penalty Tie Breaker) The Homeless World Cup is a sporting event organised by Homeless World Cup Foundation, a social organization which advocates the end of homelessness through the sport of association football - Walk out to the castle short walk, went to Joke store, comic store, etc. - Walk through various arcades - Loved walking in the arcades - Cardiff Market - Local market walk. Had Cannabis lollipop, slightly buzzed - Walk in arcades, quick lunch at Gregs. - Very cool stores, vintage video game parlor, skateboarding shops, fun toy shops, our perception of Cardiff as compared to the previous day had completely changed, it was such a fun place! - Dinner + Red Beer at Corner House - Walk to Sophia Garden, board the bus to London Victoria
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Day 11 // 28th July 2019 - Reached home late at night, ate basic stuff - Morning, wasn't feeling too well (bunch of things mentally + homesick). - Chilled at home, cleaned everything, kitchen, laundry, etc. - Went to the park near Webber St. for a walk - Ate a fruit, video called Akshita, she looked cute, was watching Kapoor & Sons - I went back home, packed my stuff for Scotland, spoke to Akshita again, we had an emotional moment. - I took the bus to Victoria & left for Edinburgh, that was a tough ride, I was very uncomfortable through the journey, won't forget that night for sometime man! Phewww!
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Day 12 // 29th July 2019
- Reached Edinburgh early in the morning. Walked down to the hostel. - Crashed in the hostel's (Baxter's Hostel) cafeteria since my check-in was 6 hours later. The people running that place were v sweet! 10/10 would recommend. - Got to my bed at 2 PM. Slept immediately. - Woke up at 5 PM, met Nimesh (Indian connect ftw, he was from Canada), he was gracious enough to lend me his hop on/hop off bus ticket, that was valid for the next day as well - Walked around Waverley Mall, ate a quick Chinese meal. Booked my ghost tour for 9 PM the same night, but reached the incorrect meeting point - Walked around the city & went back to the hostel by 10:30 PM, not a lonely walk, since the fringe setup/arrangements were on, Edinburgh was buzzing!
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Day 13 // 30th July 2019 - Woke up late, fresh finally! Quick shower & out.  - Bright sunny day (Thank god for that!). - Grabbed a subway & took the hop on - hop off bus - Reached the entry point to Arthur's seat. Trekked Arthur's seat. Beautiful. Spent an hour there, ate fruits while I chilled with myself. - Went to the Scottish Parliament - Took rounds of the city on the bus, got to know about the significance of Edinburgh in J.K.Rowling's life & the world of Harry freaking Potter. (Trivia: Rowling incepted Harry Potter in Edinburgh. She wrote The Sorcerer's Stone at a cafe 'The Elephant House' & the Deathly Hallows in suite 501 @ The Balmoral (Bang opposite Baxter Hostel)) - Walked the lovely Victoria Street, ate a heavy meal @ Nando's - Finally went for my Murder & Mystery walk at Victoria Street, too much fun! - Walk to the hostel, slept.
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Day 14 // 31st July 2019 - Woke up late, breakfast @ McDonald's - Bus to Glasgow [ Wanted to visit another part of Scotland, since I hadn’t pre-booked my Highland’s tour :( ] - Wrote a couple of Thumb-stopper scripts on the way, kept me engaged & distracted - Reached Glasgow, walked around - Went to a Gurudwara, needed to visit an Indian place of worship, felt extreme comfort - Visited the Botanic Garden - Walked across the city, found the film+book+music store - Went to the riverside : Clyde River - Continued walking around the riverside, long walk, its a lonely city, it started drizzling, no one around - Didn't find anything interesting in Glasgow, quite low. Maybe I didn't go there on a good day, went back to Bus Station, phone got spoilt in the rain. Got a bus back to Edinburgh & bunked at the hostel
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Day 15 // 1st August 2019 - Woke up early, had to meet Aditi & film The Otherside episode with her! There was a kick in my walk finally, after the last couple of days of gloom and Aditi's energy was so positive & happy, it just pulled me out of where my mind was looming.  - Met & shot the episode with her at Assembly @ George Square, we ate some lovely crepes later. - Walked around Edinburgh, visited The Scottish Art Gallery, saw my favorite painter: Rembrandt’s original, authentic work!!! Saw his mentor Pieter Lastman’s work as well. Oh man! (I know I left Edinburgh the same day when the Fringe was beginning, it was mistimed... my trip there, didn’t plan it that way, so please don’t remind me that :( & anyway I had fun there) - Bus to airport ---> Flight to London Stansted ---> Train to Tottenham ---> Underground switch  - Reached Southwark, picked up basic groceries from the supermarket - Home: Started packing, cleaning up, laundry stuff
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Day 16 // 2nd August 2019
- It was a sunny day, had to do final packing, shopping & visit the places that were on the check list, all in the limited number of hours & considering that I wake up late, anyway, I think I managed to do a great job!  - Kept all my bags ready & headed out after cooking myself a quick meal at home - Went straight up to Green Park, chilled for a while - Walked around Buckingham Palace - Went to Harrod’s, that’s a mind-boggling shopping space. Crazy! - Had to visit the iconic Abbey Road and click a picture of that street. There’s too much artistic history in London! What to do. - And I cannot thank Kunal Rao enough for recommending Hampstead Heath, it is the BEST park ever. What diverse experience. Yoga, silent open air disco, writers sitting in isolation & writing, young couples chilling, boys playing football, people having wine, some men fishing, while some swam, it was all happening there. Perfect example of Mutual Co-existence. Spent a couple of hours there, ate fruit, absorbed the air, my trip was coming to an end, what a bummer :( - Ran to Oxford Street, had to do all the shopping, then & there. - I shopped from LUSH, Sports Direct, Primark, Adidas, Marks & Spencer. You’d want to spend all your money on that street, it’s peak capitalism, but too attractive to not spend. Such dilemma for an existential person yaar. (Notice the change in me from day 2 to day 16?) - Reached home late in the night, bid adieu to this beautiful house in the heart of London, very grateful! - Picked luggage & left for Harsha Di’s place, saw a film shoot happening on the street when I left, now the person I am, I found that symbolic like: chalo beta it’s time to go back to films (Bombay), haha! - Got on a train to Wembley, met Harsha Di & jiju, went to their place, she’d made fresh indian food! Tasted a roti after 17 days, oh man, that is unmatchable, the hype is true! - Chilled with the two of them & crashed, had an early morning flight.
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Day 17 // 3rd August 2019
- Woke up early, Harsha di & Alok jiju drove me to the Heathrow & the trip came to an end! What an experience man. Wow! I was amazed.
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SPECIAL THANKS TO HRISHIT, SIDDHARTH & HARSHITA DI FOR THE MAKING SURE I HAD THE BEST TIME! AND TO KUNAL, ASHISH, VASANI & AKHIL FOR THE RECOMMENDATIONS AND AS ALWAYS, MOM (FOR EVERYTHING)
I also realised that I quite enjoy my own company & thoughts, so was able to spend almost 20 days by myself, of course I met friends, comics & stuff, but for the most time, I was alone & I think I did well. Took care of everything, from food, travel, laundry, mopping, grocery shopping, managing expenses while on a budget trip along with having an absolutely kickass time and enormous learnings.
Special Mention & MUST HAVE: ‘Citymapper’ App (It sorted my life from day 1. No other App is required if you have this App)
OVERALL TRIP AFTERTHOUGHT:  I absolutely loved my time in U.K. It’s the culture, the architecture, the people who make the place, all of which were very good & the best part is that they have preserved and maintained their history, they hold it so dearly (even though most of the wealth is a result of imperialism & looted from other nations, they have cultivated a culture & market out of it) and that’s something that I think we lack as a nation. I recently read an article that said RK Studios in Chembur has been demolished since they were running losses and the land has been sold to a big real estate company for apartments to be made. All the memorabilia, the emotions, the films which were shot in that iconic studio gone! All at once. Somehow I feel, that in another country perhaps, it would have been valued more, art would be given much more respect.
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aquarianlights · 7 years ago
Text
Inspirational Message To My Future Self
I honestly cannot wait until I’m in Vet Med focused classes and my entire life is medicine and I can just fucking devote my entire days and nights to studying and being in school and stressing about tests and spend like at least 12 hours a day focusing on JUST MEDICINE and like not have to worry about ANYTHING ELSE. That’s what I want in life right now. . .to have such a busy school schedule that my entire 24 hours in a day is devoted to my major and nothing else. Like, no love interests or dating or bullshit like that. . .being completely single and owning dogs and living in a decent apartment with a friend or two and being on campus again and coming home borderline exhausted but having to stay up anyways because medicine never stops and maybe going to like one party a month and being on campus in a uni again (online classes have grown old tbh) and drinking to be social instead of to cheer myself up and having late night get togethers with other medical majors and being able to complain about stuff going on that is medicine related like BASICALLY I JUST WANT TO LIVE IN A GREY’S ANATOMY WORLD BUT WITHOUT ALL THE ROMANCE BULLSHIT. And then I want to be finishing up my degrees in my 40s and working on my Ph.D. by then and maybe have been working as a vet tech or assistant for my 30s and just having my entire life devoted to animals and medicine and no family bullshit or romance bullshit, just friends and animals and medicine and that’s it. I’m a completely school/career focused individual and from ALL MY BULLSHIT 14+ PAST PARTNERS AND GETTING ENGAGED ONCE AND LIVING WITH MY EX-FIANCE like. . .yo. I’m 25 now and I just don’t want to be with anyone anymore. The single life is where it’s at, tbh. Being with friends, being able to focus on things other than school, having mad crushes but not actually getting into the relationship part of it and just having fun and not even worrying about where my love life is going because who the fuck wants to be chained down in a marriage and have kids (ew coz kids are legit satan reincarnate and ruin your life, like, your personal life is basically over when you have a kid) like. . .I am poly and asexual and career driven for a reason. I’m a strong, independent, animal-loving, EXTREMELY focused transboy who knows what he wants and is determined to get it. 
I know exactly what I want: A Ph.D. in Vet Medicine, a decent sized house in the suburbs with friends from college (preferably other medicine majors) and assorted pets (pomeranians are a must), a small half hour+ commute to my university of choice on a train or ferry, to be able to drink and do drugs socially instead of as a need, to have such a busy schedule that I don’t have time to think about anything and come home exhausted, but satisfied, my own Vet Clinic when I’m MUCH MUCH older with a completely platonic partner from Med school, a bunch of irl platonic relationships where we meet up once a week and just hang out and catch up on the latest in our lives while watching netflix and eating good food, enough money to not have to worry about rent and bills and food and food/toys for my dogs and cats, to have the option to climb the career ladder and being able to climb it at will, to be in a fraternity at least once, to be able to go out and do things at will by myself without worrying about all these anxiety-related things that actually only exist in my mind, the ability to genuinely not care what other people think about me, to keep up with the youth(tm) while I grow older so I don’t get out of date with electronics, to be confident as all fuck, to be able to exude warmth, kindness, positivity, and love to everyone and anyone I meet, to live in Massachusetts within a few hours from Boston, to never EVER be in a psych ward again, to be able to manage in life without therapy, AND FINALLY to be able to afford HRT and top surgery and to go through with it completely with minimal problems from society and the complete support of every friend I have. Oh and y’know to see Bernie Sanders as president once in my lifetime. Tbh. HAH.
I want a lot of things and I have high af aspirations, but I feel like if I stay focused, driven, and my psych meds keep working like they have been, I’m going to be able to achieve absolutely everything I want. I want to have a NEAR neurotypical, normal, average life. . .I know I will never be entirely neurotypical and I will have to work hard af to get through all my psych problems. . .but I really feel like I can do this.
I long for other things, but these are the things I KNOW 100% that I absolutely want. It’s taken me 25 years to figure all this out and to be sure of what I want. I can’t even TELL YOU how many times I have switched majors, but now I have hit on something that really works for me. When I was asked what I wanted to do when I grew up as a kid, I always wrote down to be an author or a vet. And I strayed from the Vet bit coz I shadowed a vet for a while in middle school and they let me in on a surgery and the second the vet opened the golden retrievers stomach with a laser scalpel, I got EXTREMELY light headed and legit fainted. The vet and tech had to catch me and the dog. Like. I gave up on my dream instantly after that. But now I’ve done a bit of vet work and, although I have a pretty bad needle phobia, that is the really the only thing standing between me and my goal. I’m definitely book smart enough to get through it, I’m determined and driven enough, I’m focused enough, I can visualize the end goal VERY clearly, and I have practiced injecting animals enough by now (when my cats were very sick, they needed injections, among other things, and I forced myself to do the injections every day to get over my needle phobia) that I really think I can get through ANYTHING they throw at me. I want to focus on just general vet medicine, but I have an interest in exotic specialty. I don’t know enough to know if I want to go that route yet (and I won’t until I take a class on it), but I know I DEFINITELY want to work in general vet med, dogs and cats, etc. . .
I’m writing all this because there are days and nights where I feel like I need to give up and can’t do this. There are days and nights where it’s hard to visualize the end goal, but I can always see it, even if it’s hazy. There are days and nights where I’m sobbing, shaking, and holding a bottle of pills in my hands, ready to overdose and end it. But, there are also days and nights where I know FOR SURE that this is what I want and this is what I’m going to do. It’s normal to have doubts. It’s fucking NORMAL. And I need to remember that on those dark days/nights.
So I’m writing this as a kind of letter to myself that I can look back at on those days and nights where I have doubts and reaffirm my goals and the end result.
You can do this, Riley. You can get through whatever you’re going through, no matter how bad it may seem. You’re an amazing individual with a lot of intellect and you have a talent for school. You may not have much common sense or societal skills, but you can get through all of that for the end goal. What matters is that you end up happy. . .and you know true and well that all of this will make you happy and fulfilled and you can die knowing you did everything in your power to achieve these goals. Your life may be semi-stagnant right now, but it won’t be forever. You will eventually get off of disability and be able to work hard af to get through life and be a unique member of society. You can do this. Don’t give up. What matters is that you NEVER give up.
You can do this.
I can do this.
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