#cos thats definitely what i want to do

[silhouettecrow]

365 Days of Writing Prompts: Day 153

Adjective: Shared

Noun: Vein

Definitions for those who need/want them:

Shared: distributed between members of a group; used, occupied, or enjoyed jointly with another or others; possessed in common with another or others; posted or reposted on a social media site or application

Vein: any of the tubes forming part of the blood circulation system of the body, carrying in most cases oxygen-depleted blood toward the heart; (in general and figurative use) a blood vessel; (in plants) a slender rib running through a leaf or bract, typically dividing or branching, and containing a vascular bundle; (in insects) a hardened branching rib that forms part of the supporting framework of a wing, consisting of an extension of the tracheal system, or a nervure; a fracture in rock containing a deposit of minerals or ore and typically having an extensive course underground; a streak or stripe of a different color in wood, marble, cheese, etc; a body of subsurface water, especially as considered a source or potential source of water for a well or wells and thought of as flowing in a channel; a source of a specified quality or other abstract resource; a distinctive quality, style, or tendency

[guinevereslancelot]

why do i feel weirdly guilty for taking a day off of work to have necessary surgery 🤡

[toytulini]

i made an oc thats at least nicknamed "Stupid" and im constantly thinking about what a power move that is tbh

[ham1lton]

omg i had a similar idea about how yn’s birthday would be what exposed lewisyn but i didn’t send it bc i didn’t think you’d like it 🫣🫣🫣 i was just thinking that he’d get her something REALLY nice and everyone’s like 🤨🤔 whose boss would get them this….(as a kpop girlie my headcanon was that he flies her to coachella to see blackpink vip LMAO but honestly your choice)

author’s note: LEWISYN LEWISYN *we all chant in unison*. this is a part of the dream girl universe but can be read as a stand alone! also i’m posting the oscaryn fic tomorrow! so keep an eye out for that :D

liked by bestie1, alexandrasaintmleux and 728,928 others.

yourusername: when your boss pays for an all inclusive holiday for you and your girls for your birthday, but you miss his dog so you force him to send you updates every day 😔

view all 47,982 comments

user1: happy bday girl but this isn’t normal 😭

-> user2: bye she’s so real for this because if i could get exclusive lewis hamilton selfies I WOULD 😭

user3: you posted a darry ring box on your story? who bought it for you?

-> yourusername: lewis! :)

-> user4: hey babe… that’s literally INSANE

-> user5: idgi? what’s a darry ring? why is it insane? it’s just jewellery 🤷🏾‍♀️

-> user4: you can only buy ONE darry ring per LIFETIME. they make you submit your id so you can never buy another. it’s meant to be for your soulmate 😭 and lewis bought one for his ASSISTANT 😭

-> user5: nah, they GOTTA be fucking.

-> user4: worse. they’re in love.

carmenmmundt: HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEET GIRL ♥️

-> yourusername: i can’t even believe it but thank you babe!!! mwah!! we’ll go out as soon as i come back!!! :D

-> user6: my fav wags :(( gonna miss yn when lewis goes to ferrari :((

bestie1: HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY BESTIE!!! SEXIEST GIRL EVER!!!!!!11!!!111

*liked by yourusername.*

user19: people talking about the darry ring like what about the HOLIDAY TO HER FAVOURITE PLACE??? like that is literally CRAZY???

-> user19: … you hiring? lewishamilton 👀

-> user21: fuck that, do you have an opening in your relationship? lewishamilton yourusername? 👀 bitch scooch over!! i want y’all 🤷🏻‍♀️

user20: what f1 driver wants to have a weird codependent relationship with a romantic subtext with me?

-> user21: i didn’t realise how much of a wattpad ass trope lewisyn is 😭 rich older famous hot boss and younger funny pretty employee who does whatever she wants while the boss is just fondly endeared.

-> user22: THAT SHOULD BE ME!!!!! 😔

-> user20: we can still do it oscarpiastri

-> oscarpiastri: no thank you! 🙂‍↔️

user28: yourusername are you and lewis dating be honest?

-> yourusername: NO 😭 i am definitely still single. lewis and i are just close friends that’s it!

-> user29: he said ‘happy birthday to my favourite girl, i want to spend all the rest of them with you’ in his post to you…. THATS A BOYFRIEND ASS QUOTE DONT LIE 😭

-> yourusername: that’s really normal??? like i’m sorry that you don’t have a decent relationship with your boss? 😭

user10: this whole bday thing is so funny cause why is yn trying to pass this as a normal employee and employer relationship 😭

-> user11: like you don’t see charles taking his assistant on romantic candlelit dinners do you 😭

-> user12: maybe if he does that, he’ll win a wdc. lewis does it, and he won eight, to ME!

user26: her insta stories are packed with all the gifts he bought her omg. someone tallied it all up and why did it amount to 1.7 million?!????

-> user27: IM SO JEALOUS

alexandrasaintmleux: next time brunch is on me ! 🥰 happy birthday honey 💕

-> yourusername: ily alex :(

-> user7: 1644 got the baddest bitches i know that’s right!

user13: lewisyn be normal challenge: FAILED!

-> user14: lewisyn be hopelessly in love with each other and co-parent lewis’ dog together challenge: COMPLETE!

user15: everyone talking about how weird it is that lewis spoils yn for her bday but why can’t we NORMALISE this?????? i want MY lazy ass boss to see shit like this and feel so ashamed that he books me on a cruise or some shit 😭

user17: LEWISYN CONFIRMED !!! WE CHEERED !!

-> user18: did you see his birthday post to her? babe it’s BEEN confirmed 😭

user24: im new to this. is yn lewis’ wag?

-> user25: no! she’s his assistant.

-> user24: don’t believe it. sorry.

user16: to everyone thinking this is weird, lewis’ team are like family to him. yn has been with him for almost a decade. like ofc he’s gonna reward loyalty? especially when she’s gotten offers from other celebs and brands. she could have pivoted to being an influencer but she likes working for lewis and it’s clearly mutual?

*liked by yourusername.*

landonorris: did you get my flowers?

-> yourusername: no?? :(

-> lewishamilton: roscoe ate them. my bad.

-> user8: MESSY ASS 😭 that dog did not eat those damn flowers.

-> user9: roscoe at home rn like … what he say fuck me for 🐶

-> yourusername: dw lando!! we’ll still have our weekly movie night when i come back!!

-> landonorris: :D

— dream girl taglist: @flowergirl1134 @laur20a23 @greantii @rafebun @sumlovesjude @papayadays

— all works taglist: @luvsforme @yelenasloverrrrr @donttouchthegnote @chelle1306 @bloodyymaryyy @aliciaablueprint @lennnooshh @km-23mr @stinkyjax @f1kenzzz @ctrlyomomma @theblueblub @lavisenri @marshmummy @23victoria @ourlifeforchaos @namgification @tallrock35 @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @ariellovelynn @shhhchriss @lifeless-firefly @xylinasdiary @evie-119 @itseightbeats @tsireyasgf @landososcar @yongi-lee @maxlarens @velentine @m1892 (if you were on more than one of the taglists, i’ve only tagged you once! :) also if you’re on the solo lewis taglist, i’ll tag you in the mentions as tumblr limits mentions at 50 per post!! :( and if you’d like to join either taglist, fill out this form! make sure you read the explanatory box, fill the form out correctly and allow your account to be tagged or i can’t tag you!)

[sunny-knight]

@forgettable-au FAN ANIMATION ! LOUD NOISE WARNING!

*What was it all for…?

Song: Vishnu <3 by Peter Cat Recording Co.

…okay.

The main inspiration for this…can be summed up with I LOVE HOW SAD THIS CONCEPT IS. BUT i also adore how WEIRD it is.

This whole thing must be pretty weird and creepy for the characters right??? Like- we dont know for certain what EXACTLY is gonna happen, but we know for a fact that Wingdings finds out hes in a game, then kills himself so he can be closer with god-

THATS PRETTY WEIRD 😭😭 also sad but we can ignore that for now

I also experimented a tad with this in working with silence, so timing things at my own pace! It was really hard! I HAD SO MUCH FUN!!!!!!!

But, time for my FAVORITE PART….ANALYSIS!!!

DISCLAIMER: some things stated as fact haven’t been said in the blog/arent canon to the au itself, just my animation/theories/interpretation, cause i’m silly and headcanoning :3

TITLE:

The proper title ive given this is “To You” which means 2 different and very vague things. What happened to you? and sending a message like “this is To You”.

In that case, “you” is whichever version of Papyrus/Wingdings/Gaster you want- Its not exactly clear which version of him means “you” which is kinda the point. The lines blur together sometimes…

But yeah, Gaster/crazy WD sends messages TOO himself so they’re “To You”

CONTEXT

Wingdings has JUST turned himself into Gaster. Ignore how impossible Sans interacting with him in this moment is, and just hear me out on the angst possibilities-

SCENE 1

As Sans approaches the mess- Gaster is encased in shadow, and looks at him. Expression not telling much- just looking blankly. Doesn’t even look like he’s alive… just… moving. Also the eye thats open, is just a slit. because- perspective. BUT I also had fun putting that there and going hehehehe it looks like WD/Papyrus’ eye

Sans approaches, and getting engulfed in the shadow, leaving the light.

His expression here was REALLY fun and REALLY hard to draw. Angry? maybe. stunned and terrified? DEFINITELY.

In this context (that doesn’t have a lot to go off of with the comics, YET) Sans knows that this was all very much intentional. He absolutely does not want to be angry, and is certainly only feeling it subconsciously.

But… he wanted so badly to understand, and enter his brother world. But now, Sans is just… Baffled. Hes like “what the fuck did you do???”

SCENE 2

Gaster continues to look blank. Looking up at Sans as he approaches, encasing him in even more shadow.

Sans’ hand reaches to Gasters face. From Sans’ perspective, his intentions are like checking for a pulse. Not literally ofc cause pulses arent on our face- but like, feeling for him. For a sign that something is there. (It’s also meant to be something motherly/comforting)

But then, Gaster leans into the touch, somewhat reciprocating this wordless “ive got you” gesture. That’s what makes Sans go from Terrified to just purely grief stricken. His brother is still alive. And he loves him.

But this form wont last for long…For universe fixing screw ups reasons :D 👍

SCENE 3

Gaster then opens his eyes, revealing hes even still got eye lights available for him. Thats what just SHATTERS the dam, and Sans embraces him suddenly.

SCENE(S) 4

Then, the “reset” happens, Gaster is gone, and Papyrus appears in place of Wingdings in his bed.

Nothing is boiling to add to a “frozen in terror” feeling!

Now- drawing all of the differences between the past and present rooms. DESTROYED ME. i HAD SO MUCH FUN BUT I ALSO CRIED 😭 There are no thank-you letters to santa, no racecar bed, no silly bone painting, no action figures, just BORING

I also wanted to keep everything monochromatic, so ofc we’ve got black and white for the void/Gaster, blue for Sans, red for Papyrus, and purple for Sans and Papyrus together.

The tape recorder and lab coat are still greyscale though cause Wingdings still has SOME of his stuff lying around. But the tapes are indecipherable, and Papyrus threw out that lab coat the first chance he got. It gave him the absolute worst feeling, worse than anything he’s ever experienced.

Something I also really enjoy is the fact that the dress shirts were still technically Wingdings’ but they’re red for Papyrus. The lab coat is the only real WINGDINGS thing that Papyrus wants absolutely no part in. Some things that were Wingdings’ are now Papyrus’ cause :D👍

in place of the bone painting are just family photos that I also have extra to say about. Someday I wanna make a comic of what happened to those/what I think would happen to em.

One day Papyrus is like “HEY UH- SANS! THESE PHOTOS! I DON’T LIKE LOOKING AT THEM! CAN WE NOT!?” Aka, he doesn’t remember these things happening/these photos being taken… BUT THEYRE PHOTOS OF HIM.

So he just feels really uncomfortable looking at memories he should reasonably remember, but doesn’t at all- and Sans gets that. But he keeps em in his drawer. Then! they hung up the bone thing in place of it cause SILLY!

But the family photos, I still had fun with. From left to right theyre a photo of Semi with the twins, the twins as baby bones, then as slightly older kids, then WDs graduation photo.

CONCLUSION!

This entire thing was so much fun, and I feel i’ve really grown as an artist over the process of experimenting and not being knocked down by annoying setbacks,

Also, as usual, Works In Progress’ plus extra behind the scenes stuff will be posted shortly after this!! YIPPEEE!!! HAPPY NIGHTMARES!!!!!

OHHHH ALSO EXTRA ART!!!

“AREN’T THEY BEAUTIFUL?”

That silly moment when your clone is really weirdly obsessed with stars and enthusiastically holds your eye sockets open to show you them

[mikgreo]

BLLK BOYS! + “tits, boobs, or thighs?”

18+ slight nsfw, fluff.

ft. isagi, sae, aiku, reo, nagi, shidou.

a/n: im having blue lock brainrot and i cant escape them. YES, i had to write each one individually😊 kinda biased on reo.. hes my fav<3

MIGHT DO A PT. 2!!

➩ YOICHI ISAGI thighs.

he likes to think of himself as a gentleman, so he fears that staring at your ass or tits would make you uncomfortable. but from past experiences and from what hes seen, hes picked up that girls love having hands on their thighs. he loves resting his hands on your thighs and giving them an occasional squeeze. he doesnt care if your skinny, chubby, or overweight, he loves them, as much as he loves you.

“huh? honey, why are you asking me that, haha.” he scratches the back of his head, “if i had to be honest, i’d say your thighs, i love how squishy they are.”

he says as he kissed your cheek and hugged you tight, “i love you no matter what, baby <3.”

➩ ITOSHI SAE ass.

sae loves buying you expensive dresses, he likes bringing you to the fancy dinners or parties his co-workers invite him to. he loves the way the tight dresses he buys you complement your body and curves. he has you close by at all times and is very possessive of you, he finds himself holding you under his “wing” and putting his hands on your waist. he knows what he has and isnt scared to show it off, but he also knows youll be facing him the whole time, so he likes to show off his girl.

“hm. probably yer ass.” he said having the same nonchalant look on his face. “i like having those old geezers have something, they wish they could get, to look at. makes em reaal jealous. makes me the best for having such a beauty by my side.”

“i like showing off my trophies.”

➩ OLIVER AIKU tits.

aiku has a guilty pleasure of sucking on your boobs, he denies having a mommy kink, but he thinks it would be so fucking hot getting you pregnant and sucking milk out of your tits. hes not picky, but he prefers bigger boobs, he likes laying his head on them also, while fondling them.

“i hate to admit, but i fuckin’ love your tits, babe.” he looks up at you while he has his head on your chest.

“they’re jus so damn squishy and round, they sit so pretty, luv.”

➩ MIKAGE REO thighs.

growing up around money and wealthy people, the rich women he would encounter had always had some sort of plastic surgery/ procedure done, which he hated. he wanted a woman who had natural beauty, and a naturally beautiful personality to go with that. so when he met you, he fell in love, of course he couldn’t immediately act on it, not only fearing his parents disapprovement but he was scared that you would only like him for his money. but you guys hit it off just fine (a/n: i will prob write a fic ab this later, teehee.) present time, he is so inlove with you, he likes that you have natural features, of course paying no mind that you wear makeup or not, he loves you for you. he likes your thighs because its the only thing he knows a woman cant change about herself, he likes the naturalness that comes with them.

“Well, i love your thighs baby.. probably because i love laying on them, and i love how warm they are. so comfy too.” he kisses the top of your head.

“.. and cus i know thats the only thing you cant change about yourself so they’re mine forever<3.”

➩ SEISHIRO NAGI tits.

why? cus he likes the erocticness of them. (a/n: is that a word??) hes seen many video games with big busted women, so he’s always found them attractive, nagi also thinks its too much of a hassle to focus on anything else on the body, naturally boobs are the most prominent feature on a girls body, they easily stand out. so he just went with that. he personally likes to lay on them, alot. nagi would prefer smaller chested girls, mainly because he thinks theyre adorable, he would definitely belittle you because of it, since he is so used to seeing women with big boobs, he thinks small ones are less overwhelming, but cute.

“mm, probs yer boobs. i like the way they feel, like stress balls, i like that theyre not big, but not too small. theyre just right for me. theyre cute.”

he definitely was confused on why you were blushing but also mad at him. no girl wants her boyfriend to tell her she has a small chest!!!

➩ RYUSEI SHIDOU ass.

shidou loves slapping your ass. in public? hes gripping it. private? cupping it. around his friends? slapping it. there will never be a time where hes not doing something with your butt. this man is a sucker for doggy, and backshots, o how he loves them. he definitely makes u do reverse cowgirl as well. definitely unironically says “gyat” to you..

will eat ur butt. will do anal. hes that freaky..

“you seriously asking me dis? obviously yer fucking butt dude i love it, i could go onnn and on about how soft and jiggly it is. level 5 gyat mama.” he winked at you turning around, crouching down to get something from the fridge. you sprinted over to him just to slap his butt for revenge.. he did not like that. lets just say u wont he walking anytime soon!!

[monzterbatz]

thinking about the relationship between bot and mephone oh my god (analysis post)

so, it's known how it's heavily implied bot is mephone's favorite contestant in iii, right? there's quite a bit of evidence to back this up:

• "listen yinyang, you're great. possibly my second favorite contestant still here!" <- well, what's his first favorite?

• when bot gets eliminated: "any chance you'd... want to co-host?" mephone obviously wants them to stay and is upset when they DO leave:

• "that's what happens when two alliances get SO caught up in their own drama, that they force out the greatest player!" <- he thinks they were the greatest player out of everyone in iii

• + him standing up for them with the springtastic contract ofc ("i don't like how they treated you.")

well yeah, that's all nice and dandy, you may or may not have realised that already, but then you think about... why specifically is bot his favorite out of everyone? well...

what if it's because bot is the only contestant that mephone didn't make?

what if its because they werent restricted by his creativity and basic personality ideas/stereotypes like how the others were made, outside of the narrow mindset he inherited from watching just reality tv in his past? what if it's because bot is also a robot that was made for a specific purpose, just like him? what if he looks up to the fact bot found themself and CHOSE who they were, something that mephone always wanted to do but couldn't because of cobs?

mephone looks up to bot because they're something that he always strived to be; something unique. they might even have felt more alive to him subconsciously, which is ironic cause they're a literal robot, but that also makes them familiar to him in a sense; mephone grew up in solidarity next to a bunch of lifeless or barely sentient technology and no people from the outside world except for steve cobs (which is DEFINITELY not saying much) so to see another robot that's actually full of life must be something new to him, something special

oh yeah also the fact bot had actual good parental figures 😭 definitely something mephone wishes he has

it's honestly quite heartwrenching to see the parallels between the two, and the fact bot might be one of the only ones who survived after ii17 makes it hurt so much more considering both of them lost everyone else they cared about; they're both kinda in the same boat in some ways

but yeah thats abt it, thank you if u read this far lol 🙏 making analysis posts like these r rlly fun these two r silly

[star-sim]

shhh! ☆ jayhoon

☆ non-idol! jay x fem! reader, non-idol sunghoon x fem! reader ☆ summary: your secret relationship with him (& how you get caught!) ☆ genre: fluff, bullet points ☆ warning(s)? noooo

jay ☆

okay... hear me out

school au, where you and jay are the class co-presidents

and i'm not talkin goody two shoes dutiful co-presidents

IM SAYING TYRANNICAL CO-PRESIDENTS

you and jay were the class co-presidents, but you two were also the biggest most arrogant ASSHOLES

like somehow you guys have been put into office 3 years in a row

and even though people lowk hate you both, theyre more scared of ygs than anything

yk how in some animanga there's that corrupt student council trope... thats you and jay

threatening people, bribery, blackmailing, using lackeys....... nothing crazy but yall are NOT clean goody two shoes

im just saying... yall have SO MUCH power and influence

everyone is like legitimately afraid of ygs

on the outside you and jay seem to have an exclusively business relationship

to everyone, you're two power-hungry assholes who use each other to achieve their goals

at council meetings you and jay talk very cordially and formally, everytime you're seen together, you guys always whisper to each other briefly, before putting on your painfully fake smiles again and barely ever speaking to each other again

but behind closed doors....

yall are DATING dating

who knew that you, the condescending bitchy co-president, and jay, the most arrogant bastard of a co-president, were ALL FLUFF FOR EACH OTHER???

you and jay do such a good job of concealing your relationship that there's rumors that you and him actually secretly hate each other

heck, there's even a rumor that you'll stab him in the back later this term

after council meetings, you and jay stay back to "discuss private matters"

yall know damn well that's not what's happening

the moment that your snooty class treasurer shuts the door and leaves the two of you alone, jay's already pushing you against the wall

imagine.... makeout sessions in empty classrooms, and coming out with messed up uniform, swollen lips, and suspiciously timed breathlessness

jay would LOVE it if you grabbed onto his uniform tie and yanked him toward you, he gets the butterflies big time

whenever you pull jay aside to whisper something into his ear, everyone assumes that you're telling him about some confidential or urgent student council matter

nope!! 90% of the time it's you whispering "you look so handsome" "i love you" "let's go on a date later" "i want to kiss you so bad" good lord

and the best part??? whenever you do this, both you and jay keep the straightest, most solemn faces, even though jay is 100% screaming and giggling and kicking his feet inside

and let's be fr right now.... you guys DEFINITELY hold hands under the table

like there will be a meeting about whatever and you and jay are just playing with each other's hands under the table

i think you've almost been caught multiple times but no one necessarily suspects that there's something between you two

everyone genuinely thinks that yall are just some cold-hearted power freaks, too cold to love anyone LOL

the amount of times that you guys accidentally left the door unlocked and someone barged in....

to be clear just bc you and jay are head over heels in love with each other does NOT mean that you guys still aren't crazy assholes

sometimes you guys purposefully don't lock the door and play something that jay likes to call "kissing roulette"

basically, you and jay leave the door unlocked and make out on a busy day when there's a lot of people still roaming the halls, whoever pulls away first out of fear of being caught loses!

you always end up winning lol

i also think that some people are just stupid because there are actually SO many signs of you and him having something

like tell me why jay is out here pulling you close up against him, hands around your waist and all, to whisper something in your ear and the first thing that people think is "oh i think they hate each other"

now..... how ygs get caught: i think you and jay decided to keep your relationship private for the sake of preserving it, like ppl talk too much and they wanna get in the way or wtv

like business must go forward even if you and jay were on top of each other mere seconds ago

like i have emphasized earlier, you and jay were lowk tyrannical

you don't know how it happened but someone in the council leaked one of the being discussed

you and jay didn't really think it was that serious but apparently everyone else was

like.... some of your classmates got HEATED LMAOAO

anyways so you and jay are just having another one of your... ahem... after school sessions

and lets just say that this particular session was errr very passionate... you missed your boyfriend okay?

it was hard to act like jay pracitcally didn't exist when all you wanted to do was kiss him every second of the day

so here you were, between jay's legs with him pressed up against some bookshelf of an empty classroom

his shirt's collar is messed up, probably with lipstick stains all over it

you have his tie scrunched up in your fist, while his hands find the hem of your uniform skirt (😋)

completely unbeknownst to you there's a whole group of students in your year marching around school lookign for you two

apparently to "give the presidents a piece of their mind"

you and jay are LITERALLY about to go a step further (🤭) when the door FLIES OPEN

AND OH MY GOD

THERE'S JUST SO MANY OF THEM

like particular session you SWORE YOU LOCKED THE DOOR

like that little group of kids were about to start yelling at you to "reconsider your decisions" but they were rendered SPEECHLESS

GAGGED EVEN

because like..... THE TWO CO-PRESIDENTS WHO SUPPOSEDLY SEE EACH OTHER AS MERE TOOLS WERE........ MAKING OUT IN AN EMPTY CLASSROOM??????

you and jay are just standing there, still against each other against the bookshelf dissheveled and all, like 😧😧

"s-sorry!" it seems like the sight of you two getting all intimate scared the shit out of those little protestors BECAUSE THEY JUST RAN AWAY AFTER THAT

the next day you and jay are the talk of the school

jay is getting pats on his back from dudes who he literally does not know

"AYYYY YOU BAGGED THE HOT PRESIDENT!!!"

and hes like "? do i know you"

and suddenly all the girls are sitting you down with cups of tea to ask you about the story of you and jay

"please girl we want to know all the tea"

???? weren't they just gossiping about you yesterday

it seemed like everyone was weirdly supportive??

like over night everyone seemed to like you guys a little bit more??

somehow yall become the it couple

i dont think jay and you immediately get more affectionate

but jay definitely takes advantage of this

and randomly kisses you throughout the day

sunghoon ☆

you and sunghoon work in the same department, under the same supervisor, in the same office, at the same table, with the same tasks, with the same pay and same skills

yet only one of you is deemed the company's #1 loser and the other the company's sweetheart

guess who ☠️

well sunghoon is definitely NOT the company sweetheart

ding ding ding! if you guessed that he's the loser you are correct

sunghoon's quiet, and gets his job done efficiently with little trouble

he doesn't mean to make people uneasy with how quiet he is

but sunghoon genuinely does not like anyone enough to be talkative, nor does he want to try to make any friends

emo ass

on the other hand you're the company's joy

everyone wants to hang out with you after work

you're the first person invited to work parties, even when it's from different departments, every guy in that office has had a crush on you at some point

you know damn well the interns are obsessed with you

absolutely NO ONE would expect the residential hot girl to be going home with THE biggest loser every night

but alas look where we are

you and sunghoon were dating waaay before either of you got a job here

you guys decided to keep your relationship secret to avoid any HR complaints or snoopy people

and it was a bit of a struggle

do you have any idea how hard it was for sunghoon to watch every man try to shoot his shot with you and NOT start screaming?

sunghoon really tried to not let his personal life interfere with his professional life

but JINWOO FROM THE SALES DEPARTMENT WAS LITERALLY ASKING YOU OUT RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM

and it was hard for you, too

having people swarm you for after-work plans was a mess

each time, you said that you were going to stay late to finish some extra work, and if you had time you'd join them

you never did

all of your work friends tried to set you up on dates with their own friends

"cmon it will be fun! get out a little!"

and every time you had to politely tell them that you were not looking for a relationship for the time being (only for you and sunghoon to pass silly love notes at the water cooler)

oh sorry did you not hear that?

YOU AND SUNGHOON PASS SILLY LOVE NOTES AT THE WATER COOLER!!!!!

it’s always the most random ripped pieces of paper with the silliest love notes

like you will rip up a spare legal document nd write “if u were a fruit you’d be a fineapple”

sunghoon tho is the type up a whole document and print it out, it’s filled top to bottom in silliness and he hands it to you like it’s an official important document 😭

every morning he makes you coffee and brings it to your desk

lers be real ppl suspect things

NOT ON YOUR PART BUT ON YOUR BEHALF

like everyone thinks that sunghoon is this loser that’s in love with you ☠️

i mean cmon… weird quiet guy that talks to no one but makes coffee every morning for that One Hot Girl???

the workplace gossips have a field day w it

in their eyes, it’s really pathetic because sunghoon is this weirdo and ur this hot woman and he’s in love with you oh my gosh this is so embarrassing for him 😭🙏🙏

they keep telling you stuff too

“omg did you see the way sunghoon looked at you?”

“he’s so weird, it’s so obvious that he liked you”

"this is so embarrassing [name] you need to reject him before he gets too eager" FREE HIM

little do they know that when you and sunghoon stay a little bit later than everyone else sometimes, the office becomes really empty

kissing in empty offices… thats it, that’s the tweet

otherwise there's a lot of other small things that you do with/for each other 

when no one's around in the break room, you love to creep up on him and give him a back hug

it scares the shit out of him but the moment that he realizes that it's you he melts right away

idk how ppl didn't notice yet

one time your washing machine malfunctioned so both you and sunghoon's white dress shirts were dyed a subtle pink color

you came into work both wearing your dyed shirts and no one stopped to think "hm why do these people both have washing machine malfunctions that malfunctioned in the exact same way?"

tbh you and sunghoon are just vibing

other than sunghoon needing to conceal his wrath every time someone flirted with you and you having to hide your increasing irritation with the amount of party invitations you got

can i just say tho

being coworkers w sunghoon is a dream

imagine what happens when yall get home tho

i know the gossip goes CRAZY… you both hate your boss so every conversation you have about him rips him a new one

now... how you guys get caught

two words: work dinners

you and sunghoon never go to them

because like... why would you want to hang out with your coworkers when you have each other?

and when you do go to them, you never really have fun

other than eating and chatting a bit you never drink or really open up…. again, because you have sunghoon... why do u need anyone else

same for sunghoon, except he literally never looks like he wants to be there so people are already reluctant to invite him

but there's this one particular work dinner that you and sunghoon are both unable to get out of

it's been a long and tiring week, both of you want to go home and take a nap together but your team had other plans

sunghoon is annoyed, yes, but hes like whatever at least there's you with him

you? youre LIVID

youre barging into that work dinner with a storm cloud around you

you have to deal with coworkers who lack boundaries every day of the week and the one time you can escape them they march back in

youre not having it 😭

you ordered like 3 beers because you were so annoyed

and also bc sunghoon was there... if anything happened you knew that he would protect you

so here you were 3 beers down…. a liiiiittle bit tipsy

okay maybe a little bit MORE than tipsy… como se dice... drunk?

when jinwoo from the sales department comes up to you

sunghoon is sitting RIGHT next to you but jinwoo ignores him

"hi [name]"

you stare at him... thousand yard stare ahhh because your drunk ass does not have it in you to endure him ☠️

"what."

jinwoo DOES NOT TAKE THE HINT

"after this, i was thinking about going for karaoke. do you want to go with me?"

normally you'd be polite and decline

even if you were a little bit tipsy you'd normally just laugh and say no

but this time

with you boyfriend right next to you, with all your tiredness, with all your anger...

"fuck no," you say plainly

the way everyone gets quiet ☠️ ppl don't hear you swear that much

but the real thing that surprises them is when you pull sunghoon towards you, hugging his head to your chest

“i have a boyfriend and you’re shamelessly flirting with me”

while sunghoon is like “!!!!!”

everyone is staring liek WHAT???????

jinwoo from sales department is GAGGED BRUH

sunghoon immediately pulls away, all red in the faced

he grabs your hand and begins dragging you out the door

"sorry everyone she's drunk right now we'll be on our way!!" and yall leave

you don't remember anything so when sunghoon explains it to you, looking like a kicked dog, youre just like "okay and? whats the problem i put jinwoo in his place" #girlboss

you're the talk of the office

this still doesn't scare off your multiple suitors

but it does allow sunghoon is be a #hater fr

he's smug

[ghoulishfreak]

dude, are you grabbing my ass? you're so fucking gay dude.

what? i'm not hard, you're hard! bro are you seriously hard right now? no way, fucking prove it bro!

oh fuck... bro you're huge... and you're not even fully hard yet, what the fuck? you want to see mine? fucking... fine, i guess since you showed me yours....

dude no way, yours is definitely bigger. lets measure, im serious! mmmfuck.. dude its not gay, your dick just touched mine, thats all. i cant help that!

dude what are you doing! let go of my co- fuck, holy shit that... thats so good. no dude dont stop. fuck i had no idea it could feel so good.. fuck fuck fuck dude i think im going to cum. no fuck don't stop, don't you dare. yeah bro fucking cum too, cum on my cock. yes yes yes, FUCK mmmhhh....

dude... i think that was gay..

[xaphii]

Pretty sure this isn't an original thought but I head-canon that solas probably used sex and flirtation during the evanuris-war, so he knows how to be chrasmatic and flirtatious and he is used to using it as a weapon.

So in DA:I when he sees Inky blushing and he speaks about dominating her will/her muscles/her reflexes? (idk what the rogue one is) and he flirts with her, even though its honest, even though he legitimatley likes her there's a part of him the recoils and whinces. Because he honestly likes this woman, but all he's ever know is how to use attraction as a weapon, as a knife, so when he uses it, even unwitingly against this woman he respects and values, it kills him a little bit. Hence the constant 'we shouldn't it isn't right'. But by the gods does he want her.

And while I don't see all the CONSTANT sexual tension people are banging on about in DATV between Solas and Rook, I do see it in the switcheroo scene in act 3 where he swaps places with them (the hand thing with the knife), and to me thats just a natural part of the dread wolf persona he wears, sexuality as a weapon. Like oh yes this man whose cheekbones and sarcasm has been disarming you for the better part of the last 2.5 acts IS the bad guy. He doesn't care about you, he needs you to fulfill a purpose, he might not have seduced you romantically but he definitely seduced you into trusting him (doubly so if you were a solasmancer cos lets be real we were all too busy drooling along to Graeth David-Lloyd's voice to pay attention to anything else) he slipped into a role he knows how to play.

So... yeah

[metalcowgirl]

☆ 𝐂𝐀𝐌𝐆𝐈𝐑𝐋 ☆

listen while you read

written 4 @bubbledtee !! i saw your concept and HAD to write about it

warnings: smut, age gaps, adult film, reader is female, degradation, manhandling

word count: 1,598

james was popular in the adult film industry. everyone always talked about how respectful he was to his co-stars and that he would always do his best to make sure you were comfortable.

 he was also rumored to make girls squirt with just his mouth alone. you were an amateur, scoring this job as sex was something you valued and considered yourself good at. you also thought doing adult film would help your confidence so you decided to give it a shot.

it was the first day you were meeting james, your partner for this scene. the fellow girls practically stared a hole through you as you walked through those doors, muttering and murmuring about what james would think of you.

it was a teacher / student scene and james had to fuck you in ways you’ve never been before. he had to be super rough with you so he decided to sit and talk to you to make you comfortable beforehand.

you saw the silver fox sitting on the sofa in the main room in the house you were shooting in. he was taking a drag from his cigar. he looked up and saw you, giving a bright smile, 

“y/n, right? i’m james, pleasure to meet you” 

he held out his hand and you gladly shook it. he was definitely super attractive for a guy his age, older guys had always been your sort of thing, and this was just adding fuel to the fire.

 “yeah.. i’m super nervous about this..” you nervously chuckled. 

“that’s understandable but i assure you, if you want me to stop at any point you have my word. promise” he gave a sweet smile.

you two talked for a few hours before you had to shoot your scene. you had already gotten so comfortable with him, and maybe even got a little flustered from his flirtatious comments about what a beautiful young woman you were. 

you went to change into what the producers/directors had given you. the casual skirt, thong and polo you usually saw in these types of pornos. you did your makeup and touched it up in the living room mirror. you noticed james in the reflection and couldn’t help but stare at him in that suit. it hugged his body just right, the shirt rolled up, showing his many tattoos and buff arms. 

you gulped nervously, flustered again as james complimented you once more.

 “5 minutes!” the cameraman yelled. 

you nervously took a deep breath, james taking notice, “remember what i said, tap me three times for me to stop doing whatever i’m doing, darlin.” you nodded in agreement, understanding him.

the scene began, and you two started off with the casual and cheesy “raise my grades” scenario. james grabbed you by the hips and started to kiss you, trailing down your neck kissing and sucking. you lightly moaned and whimpered at the sensation of his teeth against the skin of your neck. he suckled until he left hickies all over. the camera man moved to an angle so he could capture the both of you.

 james shoved you on the desk and slowly removed your panties with his teeth while on his knees. you bit your lip, staring down at the silver fox. you wanted nothing more than him to ravage you. ravage you on camera for the whole world to see. standing back up, he smacked you across your face,

 “you’ve always wanted this huh? you’re a little slut, always dressin’ like this for your teacher to see. what a gross girl you are.” 

he grabbed you by your face and told you to open wide, spitting in your mouth. he picked you up, putting you ontop his face whilst standing, eating you out. so thats how he stayed so buff at such an age.

tongue exploring your folds and your hard clit, you threw your head back in pleasure. legs already shaking from how sensitive you were, now you knew the rumors were true. this man ate you out like he was starved. the flicks of his tongue made you whimper.

animalistic growls emerging from the back of his throat, he swirled his tongue around your clit. you felt the knot begin to form in your lower half and with that, released all over his face. you began to squirt. it got all in his mouth but he didn’t care. he lapped it up like a dog. he was thirsty for you, like he needed you his entire life.

 he lifted you from his face, slamming you back down on the desk as he roughly put fingers to your clit, rubbing quickly, overstimulating you. your eyes widened and quickly rolled back, never feeling a sensation like this before. he was so rough but knew how to make it feel good. he gave your cunt a slap, sending a jolt through your body. you whimpered, earning a chuckle from him.

“get on your knees…”

 he groaned as he stroked his cock slowly. you abided, getting on your knees looking up at him with longing.

 “open that pretty mouth..”

 he chuckled as you did so, slowly pushing himself into your mouth

. “i’m gonna fuck this pretty face” he grunted,  make this makeup run..” 

you gagged in response, putting a hand to your pussy fingering yourself as he began to thrust into your mouth. he grabbed your head, holding it, thrusting in your mouth sloppily. the groans that came out of him were loud and deep. “rub that pussy for me, darlin” he thrusted a few more times before pulling out. he didn’t want to cum in your mouth—it had to be inside of you.

you got up off of your knees, getting shoved against the desk once again. he bent down to your height, whispering in your ear, “you want me to wreck this pretty little pussy, yeah?” he slowly rubbed at the spot he earlier hit, teasing your folds with his fingertips. you quickly nodded, whimpering a small “yes.”  

he roughly spread your legs, his calloused hands rubbing and running against your thighs sending a shiver down your spine. his hot breath hitching against your neck as he kissed down to your chest, grabbing one of your breasts and squeezing it. he rubbed the tip of his cock against your folds, slapping it on your clit a few times. 

you whimpered slightly earning a chuckle out of him. he slowly pushed himself into you. the adjusting to his size caused you to gasp, biting on your lip as you looked up to him with tears forming in your eyes. your makeup was already messed up from him fucking your face. once you confirmed with a smile that you adjusted to him, he wrapped a calloused hand around your throat and began squeezing as he pounded into your cunt. 

you could barely breathe from the feeling of ecstasy at this point. you needed more of him. you looked up at him with teary eyes, begging him to go harder. he smirked down at you, rubbing your clit with his thumb as he quickened his pace.

he was balls deep inside of you at this point and you enjoyed every minute of it. you could not wrap your head around how good it felt—he was the most skillful, experienced man you had ever been with. you hoped to have scenes with him in the future. no one has ever made you feel this good. 

your thoughts were interrupted by a slap across the face which made you giggle. you were practically a braindead slut at this point, the only thing being on your mind—his cock. his breathing got heavier and more intense. 

“gonna cum in this pretty pussy…you want this old man to cum inside you baby?” 

he chuckled as you whimpered in response and nodding your head. his thrusts got sloppy as he tightened his grip on your throat again. your eyes filled with tears once again. he bent down to your ear, whispering into it, 

“you’re the prettiest girl i’ve ever fucked…papa’s gonna fill you up nice and full”

your cheeks flushed pink, eyes rolling back just from his words. what he said made your cunt twitch and you loved every minute of it. you wanted nothing more than to see what it was like for him to cum inside of you. with a few more sloppy thrusts, he spilled inside of you. his cum felt warm, and this moment felt so right. cum spilling out of you and down your thighs, he placed a kiss on your lips. 

the cameras cut. james held you for a few minutes, whispering sweet nothings to you before you got yourselves washed up and showered. he stopped you on your way to your dressing room

“hope i wasnt too rough back there, you did damn good for your first time… never came that much before” he chuckled.

his words once again flustered you,  “oh really?”

he nodded in response, his hands in the pockets of his jeans, ���i meant what i said to you by the way..you really are the prettiest woman i ever fucked..”

“and you’re the most handsome man i ever fucked..” you both chuckled, just staring in eachothers eyes for a moment.

there was so much tension between the two of you. that was something you couldn’t ignore. 

you two kissed then and there. he held you close, wrapping arms around you. that moment could last forever. he was such a gentle person outside of sex and you only hoped to have him to yourself.

[toytulini]

idk. picky eater rights. im coming to your events and turning my picky bitch nose up at your fancy ass desserts you spent a bajillion hours working over in the kitchen and asking if i can find like a basic ass brownie with no extra flairs or ingredients or steps or whatever the fuck. cry about it. stop trying to feed me

[year2000electronics]

Your fiddleford monster au design makes me have so many questions in a good way. Gnawing on the bars on my enclosure kind of way. Does the curse seemingly not affect him in his one year stay helping Ford, and so he does that all himself? Does The Curse, as vague as it is, count that; and drive people to modify themselves and draw away from humanity? Like its not just this magical effect that happens but an active thing in the back of your mind to turn away from what you were born as and embrace something else? Ogh. I'm suddenly a lot more invested in this au

VERY INTERESTING QUESTIONS TO BE CERTAIN so fiddleford is a bit of a unique case where his "monster" theming is tied directly to his decline yes!

full answer under the cut it got long

in my mind, monster falls' curse is tied directly to gravity falls' natural law of weirdness magnetism/"the barrier" keeping bill in. once youve stayed there long enough for the curse to even BEGIN, it becomes harder to leave the town. you just feel drawn to it, and a dull ache in your soul if you leave. so obviously, when ford gets turned into a mothman, he does fully accept that because hes always felt more cryptid than man. but when the time comes for him to ask fiddleford for help, he lays out that "hey, youd be doing me a BIG favour if you came to help with the portal, but this town curses you if you stay for too long so itll only be a few weeks, i promise"

fidds agrees, because hey, whats a few weeks with an old friend? besides, he'll have his wife and son as an anchor to go back to. but the more he thinks about it, the more he likes staying with ford, the more he's reminded of those old times, and the more the curse starts influencing those kinds of thoughts to get louder and louder (but its not ALL the curse you know. still some autonomy in the situation) and so he keeps postponing his return date, almost "tempting fate" about the curse, because he doesn't really feel any different! his friend sprouted wings and antennae! he'd know by now, so he won't check! and ford shrugs and is like "well, alright, it's your choice, we can surely get a little closer to the point of no return"

and yknow, fiddleford denying that the curse could possibly be affecting him is almost like him in canon struggling to reconcile with his two "lives"- his home life and his life with ford. he wants to have his cake and eat it too, because he's just too timid to ever say no.

anyways, one day he wakes up and realizing he's heard the sound of technology near him for a while, and looks around, and realizes it's following him from room to room-

the beeping IS him. it's definitely been a year, he's already been cursed. it's just that he's a robot that looks near-human, just near-human enough that he could turn a blind eye to it and pretend like it never happened and that everything was fine. which i think kinda suits how ford loves the supernatural to a very personal degree, meanwhile fidds got roped into the town by pure happenstance

but. yknow, being a robot that looks human means youre still a robot. and it's a lot harder to erase things from a robot's "brain" without causing some major problems. haven't you ever been programming something or filling out an html code, and then you accidentally delete one thing you thought was inconsequential and all of a sudden youre staring at just a wall of code that's busted because whatever you removed, you DEFINITELY SHOULD NOT HAVE removed?

parts of fiddleford just go kaput and start breaking because he's purposely taking out large chunks of code from his own brain that end up being collateral from the memory gun. because, yknow, the memory gun is imprecise! it was designed for human brains! cos thats what fidds was for years! so it's like if you tried to repair a computer by ripping out the motherboard with pliers

thats my take on it anyways. Ya

[danrifics]

you all pestered me for it and here it is. the closeness analysis/ theory.

now if you didn't see I basically had this theory that the closer to BIG and COTY we get in the DAPG timeline the closer dan and phil sit to each other. Dan made a comment about how them playing Heartthrob being like a gay soft launch and that got me thinking of some other ways they could have done it and one of those being the idea that as time goes on you get less and less strict and worrisome about what others think of you and so they end up gravitating closer and closer.

This post will be under a see more cos its probably gonna be long af.

I will be splitting it into stages.

2014 -15

2016 - 17

2018

revival

sorry the screenshots arent clickable to make bigger tumblr only allows for 30 on a post so i had to group them together!

(i will not be covering horror games apart from in the revival stage and i will also not be talking much about gamingmas 2023)

2014 - 15

now when i initially went to collect my evidence, i was suddenly worried maybe i kinda had things wrong because i feel like in Donkey Kong Country (the first dapg video, see screenshot below) they're sat pretty close but honestly when we get to how they sit a lot later on you'll see that this is actually pretty far apart

now here are some screenshots for the inital look at at the end of them we'll talk (this will be the layout for most of this post i think)

now of course this is only a selection of those year's videos if i screenshotted them all i fear this post would never end. now these first 2 years are a good mix of at desk videos on sofa videos. i noticed from some other videos not show here that in sofa videos they rend to sit a lot closer to each other than they do at the desk, this is kinda funny to me cos really they definitely have room for a wider frame on the couch if they wanted to sit like normal people.

2016 - 17

2016 and the start of 2017 feel like a mixed bag of how close together they are but i did notice that the more into 2017 we got the more they seemed to be shoulder to shoulder! these also started to wean out sofa sitting games (not 100% gone yet but almost). now if you're wondering why i've kept this screenshot apart its cos this is the last one in the first london apartment.

and honestly from here on out is where i believe the "soft launching" begins!

so lets finish 2017 and see if im right!

just had to single out this screenshot for a sec:

in case anyone wondered that is the face dan made during dream daddy when phil reads "we were roommates for a while too"

softlaunch?

anyway moving on

watching these videos definitely feels like something changed btw, while they still arent as close as we'll start seeing them sit, i definitely noticed more often they were shoulder to shoulder. but like a new room has definitely changed the vibe a little bit between them, and now we can move on to the next and final year of pre hiatus dapg, where things as you will see immediately start to change.

2018

like i said... immediately we are met with this, i would also like to let everyone know that 2018 is my favourite era of pre hiatus dapg

lets see what the rest of this year will bring

now i'm splitting 2018 up into parts because i need to do a whole talk about the tour situations so for now lets look at the above screenshots, now its very obvious that they are sitting so much closer to each other which i think is really funny considering how big that room is and often in this section of videos there is a lot of room either side of them so they literally do not need to be that close.

now lets talk about the tour bus. this is how close they're sitting

thats for sure a 1 person seat yet they've both forced themselves on even tho the sofa literally behind them would have been perfectly fine to sit on, and they cant give me "this is the only place to set up the camera" babe its really not theres a whole surface behind you.

okay thank you for listening to this, moving on to the final part of 2018!

(the last 2 screenshots are out of order oops)

idk about you but yeah i think they are definetly a lot closer than they were way back in 2014. i really dont have a lot to say other than that, and i have definetly proven my theory so now we've established that lets have a brief look at post hiatus dapg!

Revival

Now this is gonna be really brief its just a summary of where we are post BIG/COTY and post hiatus (things my brain still cant quite believe is real)

now here are the revival moments i wanna give a mention!

firstly sims season ep 3 when dan moves his chair away from phil and their wheels are literally locked together, pushing phil's chair too

heres dan looking into the monitor and then moving closer to phil <3

and finally

hand hold

thanks for reading all this and sorry if it didnt live up to the hype lmao

[nicole-2099]

Jakes the type of guy to . . .

✦•┈๑⋅⋯⋅⋯⋯⋯⋅๑┈•✦

(SJ. Sim Jake. X reader)

(Headcannons)

(Smut,fluff, all the good stuff >3<)

MDI.

Note: u already know I didn’t proof read shii🤘

✦•┈๑⋅⋯⋅⋯⋯⋯⋅๑┈•✦

Jakes the type of guy to start biting your thighs just cause he can, like you could be sitting on the couch watching your favorite show and then he just starts biting and messing with your thighs and like you look at him like “wtf..” and he just shrugs it off like “idk felt like it..”

Jakes also the type to pull you onto onto his lap and just play with your tits like squeezing them or cupping them and bouncing them around, maybe even playing with your nipples if you’d let him.

Jake would also like bug you and bother you if you don’t give him attention like he’s gonna whine and beg for your attention, he would like poke your shoulder or your cheek or kiss you until you pay attention to him.

He would also like kiss you in public places just for fun, like you could be at a party and he would just come up and kiss you out of the blue and then walk away like he didn’t just do that.

Jake would also get so jealous if he saw you talking to a guy friend like you could be talking to a co-worker or a friend and Jake would just watch from afar but eventually he would come up to you and pull you away into a hallway kissing you and showing you who you belong too.

Jake would be obsessed with eating you out like, it would probably be his fav hobby if anyone asked him, but like he would for sure beg and beg just to eat you out and make you feel god.

He’d do this if you were sad or feeling down about your appearance, like if you were embarrassed about your body or something he’d definitely fuck the shit out of you till you forgot why your were upset or down, Orr he’d talk to you and hold you close in his arms whispering sweet things to cheer you up, like “you shouldn’t care about how you look cuz no matter what in my eyes your still all I want in a Girl.”

I feel like if Jake was like in another room he would send Layla like a carrier pigeon with a little sticky note on her collar with cute little notes to you like, “I know your like LITERALLY in the other room but, I miss you”

I feel like if you and Layla were having a little bonding time Jake would definitely take a bunch of pictures secretly tho so he doesn’t disturb your time with Layla.

He would definitely try to play Fortnite with you and he would purposely target you for fun, and if you ever got upset or something he’d let you target him for the rest of the game.

He would definitely buy you food and sweets and pain killers if you were cramping really bad, like he would go out of his way to make sure your as comfortable as possible and if anything happened he would be up and ready to help you.

Jake’s the type to sneak pictures of you when you look like a mess, like hair all messy and everything he’d for sure sneak pictures and keep them, not telling you cuz he knows you’d get mad.

He would be obsessed with your hair, like he would play with it, even braid it or style it for you, he’d brush it out if it was tangled, he’d curl your hair at the hard to reach places, he’d run his fingers through your hair, he’d be your personal stylist.

Ohhhh he would definitely style you in HIS clothes and then he’d take thousands of photos and then spend the rest of the day picking out one to put as his wallpaper.

✦•┈๑⋅⋯⋅⋯⋯⋯⋅๑┈•✦

Thats all I got i didn’t know what to rlly write I Js figured I should since I haven’t in a while but 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️.

[a-killer-obsession]

Omg your last Hcs ❤️🙏. Would you do a masturbation Hc for the Kid Pirates too?

Yes yes yes 🙌

Now presenting:

☠️ Kid Pirates ☠️

Masturbation Headcannons 💦

🔞 Minors DNI 🔞

CW for somnophilia but in this context please assume it is consenting and pre discussed ✌️

Kid

Hes doing it all day, every day. In bed, in the shower, at his desk, in the crows nest, in his workshop. Walk in on him? He doesn't care, he's gonna keep going with a shit eating grin on his face

He'd rather be fucking you but his libido is so high he doesn't wanna always bother you or Killer, so he's got no problem dealing with it himself

Love love loves mutual masturbation, he wants to watch you watching him

Almost everyone has walked in on him at some point

Knows what he likes and gets straight to it, he can make himself cum quick but if hes bored he'll just keep going over and over

Pretty quiet when he does it though, just grunts and small groans

Doesn't usually use anything external like toys or porn, just his imagination and good ol' righty (lefty had enough of the abuse and left him)

If you're sleeping next to him you better believe you're waking up with cum on your back or stomach if he didn't already put it in you

Killer

As I mentioned in the HC about their dicks, Killer cums a LOT and its MESSY so masturbation is a whole fucking ordeal for him. He can't just do it where or when ever he wants

Only does it in bed or the shower cos of the cleanup, and you better believe that door is LOCKED cos he feels so ashamed doing it

Likes to run his extra hand all over his body and pretend its someone else. It's definitely a intimate thing for him, if he's gonna commit to the mess he may as well make it a whole experience

Really good at holding off, hardly ever just runs away to jerk off

Moans and talks to himself a lot throughout. Bites the pillow and his own hand a lot

Owns porn but doesn't really use it, would rather just touch himself to his own imagination. Doesn't often get horny randomly so if he's run off to jerk it then there's no doubt already something specific on his mind that set him off

The exception to this is when he watches someone else fuck his girl, then he's jerking it full force and unashamed

Heat

Does it almost as often as Kid but still a fair amount

Owns an absolute treasure trove of porn and toys. Definitely has a favourite fleshlight. Probably owns one of those full on torsos

Likes to play with his ass when he's doing it

Whimpers a lot 🤤

Will shamelessly do it somewhere he shouldn't be and then just go about his day with cum still in his pants, kinda likes the thrill of possibly getting caught

Definitely has secret photos of you, don't ask what the white stain on them is

Definitely has The Sock™ and its just as crusty and fucked up as you'd think. Teenage virgin energy

He'll do it while you're asleep and leave you to wake up with cum on your pussy, thanks Heat

Wire

Doesn't have as high of a libido as the others, so he doesn't usually jerk it, he'll just make someone get him off on the rare occasion that he's randomly horny. Usually you or Heat, whichever submissive is available

Hes seen it all so he doesn't just get randomly flustered, but he doesn't let himself get pent up either. He'll have someone deal with it for him if he thinks it's been too long

Aka this man isn't going to bother masturbating, he's just gonna jam it down someone's throat instead

On the very very rare occasion, he'll jerk off watching his submissive(s) playing with themselves or each other

Dead. Fucking. Silent. You get one grunt at the end at thats IT