#controlling all your kind food leads to really messed up relationships with food

[dontlookatmytmntcollection]

Donatello (NSFW Alphabet)

Bayverse Donatello x F!Reader

Donatello is a giving, fast-paced, enthusiastic character that has tendencies to people-please; with a deep seated desire to belong. I see him being a submissive lover most of the time; needing the freedom from his busy brain and busy life. Donnie would give in to anything his lover would need from him. But you would also notice he struggles to indulge in taking what he wants, in fear of inconveniencing, pressuring, or disgusting you. Which makes those occasional moments when he takes over and give in to his dominant urges all the more delicious. 

Brief mentions of masochism, somnophilia, bondage, pegging and exhibitionalism. Word count: 2200. 

Enjoy!

A - Aftercare (What they’re like after sex) - After sex Donnie is a dumbass. Doesn’t matter what kind of sex. He’s fucked out and a bit of a goofball, so you will get cuddles and jokes and he will make you laugh. But until you ask, he’s not thinking about the mess at all. Or about water. Or food. Or anything really. It’s when you actually ask, “Babe, I can’t move, will you please grab-” He will first be horrified, then he will SCRAMBLE out of bed. He’ll wack his head against a light or something or trip over his underwear flat on his face- he’s so fucking cute. 

B - Body Part (Their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s) - If you compliment anything about his physical appearance or physic, he says stuff like “Naww.” “Staap.” “No you don’t.” But he loves the size difference. He loves how small you look against him and in his bed. Sometimes he stares at how big his hands and fingers are while fingering your little pussy and he goes brain dead. 

C- Cum (Anything to do with cum basically) - Donnie whimpers, shakes, and moves a lot during orgasm. He can’t help it. It’s one of those moments he is 100000% completely, utterly checked out. It’s so fucking hot. He also needs to be holding something. Always. He prefers to grab you into a tight, shakey hug. But if he can’t do that, he also grabs his own head and face. Donnie has also bent metal before, broken handcuffs and torn rope. He’s replaced your headboard twice now. Bit of a head pusher, so unless you are into that, tie him up or tell him to hang on to something.

D - Dirty Secret - He would love to be pegged. Already loves it when you finger and eat out his cloaca, so having you in control of his pleasure and body? It drives him insane. 

E - Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?) - Donnie’s nature is to research and to meet head-on. Between all the long term-relationship, healthy sex-life, deep-dive research (and his porn consumption); he is actually pretty prepared to have good sex. But what makes sex and his first-time terrifying is the turtle thing, his fear of you thinking he’s ugly and disgusting, and not being good for you.. His trauma and sensitive nature is completely exposed those first few times. So you taking the lead and being in charge was his saving grace. 

F - Favorite Position - Donnie does not have a favorite. He loves to change things up. But he does have a tendency to fall into a routine, and succums pleasure and intimacy. He’s not stopping a fuck to change up the position unless you tell him to do so. 

G - Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous) - Depends on how much stress he is under and how much sleep he has had. If he is well rested and life is being a little more on the good side, he is incredibly playful and cute. But if he hasn’t slept in two days, sex is overwhelming and intense and he needs that burst of good chemicals. If he is being cute and dorky while life is falling apart, its always before you start getting in his pants and directly after you’ve both finished. 

H - Hair - He doesn’t care

I - Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect) - Sex is one of the few ways you can easily pull him out of his head, so it does get intense for him. Donnie’s brain checks out once shit gets rolling, and he stays checked out when you take the lead; which is something he desperately needs. But those moments when he needs to take for once instead of give, you gotta be prepared for the most intense fucking of your life. 

J - Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon) - Donnie is the one who is a little more sloppy and risky when it comes to jerking off. Because when he needs it, he needs it, okay? He loses brain cells when he’s horney, so jerking off in his lab when one of his brothers is still awake in the kitchen over there starts feeling like a good idea. Post-nut clarity hits Donnie so hard when he’s by himself. It’s hilarious. 

K - Kink (One or more of their kinks) - Donnie is a kinky mother fucker, okay, and he is so shy about it. He will not put in requests. You will have to get it out of him, because he feels a bit of shame in that he wants to be on the receiving end of things, usually. He’s into sensory deprivation, bondage, exhibitionalism, toys, somnophilia, masochism, breeding, free-use, phone sex, all of it. 

L - Location (Favorite places to do the do) - Okay, so you gotta be careful because if you get Donnie horny enough, anywhere starts looking like ‘this will do’. It can get him in trouble, and you’re gonna have to call the shots on that one. But he does get pretty paranoid in the lair and lack of privacy, so a bedroom will be best for a while. Let him get more confident in his body and his relationship with you before y’all start getting crazy.

M - Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going) - In a scenario in which he is glued to the screens and you need lovin’s; praise. Pet names. Tracing his neck or arms. It will get his attention super fast. Everytime. He is also always horny waking up, but he is not a morning person, so you will have to do most of the work. But his noises and desperation are always worth it. 

N - NO (Something they wouldn't do, turn offs) - He doesn't like being hit, or in pain; and actually being restrained is horrifying to him. If he can’t actually snap the handcuffs or rope, and he’s being held down- things go from sexy to he doesn't want to be touched for three days. It’s a fine line, one that he didn’t know existed until it happened. Unaddressed trauma, you know?

O - Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc) - Donnie fucking loves head, okay? One of his longest fantasies was having a partner suck him off while he games. It’s a classic. And he loves giving you head, and takes massive pride in being the best there possibly is at giving it to him. 

P - Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual) - All of it. All of it. There are moments when he needs to take over, and he does get intense. But even in his most needy moments- it still doesn’t mean he’s rough. He definitely can be- but it all depends on the mood and the scenario and what you need. He’s all over. 

Q - Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often.) - He has some trouble initiating. The fear of inconveniencing you or being overly needy is prevalent in his heart. Especially at the beginning. So even if he is insanely, deliriously horny for you, he’s gonna struggle asking for relief. However, if you initiate- he’s all in. He will do whatever, whenever, however. Just keep touching him. Tell him what you need, what he should do. He will be there, please, baby. 

R - Risk (Are they game to experience, do they take risks.) - If you need him and your in charge, he gets a little pussy drunk. He will want to do whatever you want, whenever you want. He does have some fantasies of having you in semi-public areas (like his truck on a road trip). But not only does he secretly want to try everything in the book, but he is here to please you. He wants you and he wants to be yours. Ask him and he will be of service. 

S - Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last) - Donnie possesses athleticism on a level that is otherworldly. You are dating a superhero. So his stamina shows it. He can have sex all day, and be running around saving the world after. The question is, when does he find time to sleep. So sometimes, fucking him should be a seque to getting him to passing out, at last.  

T - Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves) - Donnie loves toys. Loves using them on you, loves it when you use them on him. He kinda likes the thought of building sophisticated ones for you to enjoy. He likes to watch you use toys on yourself, he likes you watching him use them- he adores it all. The introduction of toys in the bedroom was very quick, and he’d have a collection somewhere very, super hidden. 

U - Unfair (how much they like to tease) - He doesn’t like to tease you at all. He’s not the type. What you ask of him is exactly what he will give, so he struggles to deny you pleasure. However, he kinda loves when you tease him. Flirting with him, denying him, teasing him, edging him all get him feeling super hot. You become his whole world when you do, and that’s exactly how he likes it. 

V - Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make) - Donnie whimpers. He is the most gorgeous whimperer in the entire planet. He shakes and whines and moans, and he begs. His voice can get super low and then can get high and whispery- you have told him several times he could make audio porn and he doesn’t believe you. He gets a little insecure about it, because most of the time he doesn’t have a whole lot of brain power to control that. 

W - Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice) - He was fucking you hard in the back of the lab. On the old cot he kept there for emergency uses. He was getting so riled up that his brothers, just outside, were in danger of overhearing his whispers and whines. Your solution? You grabbed his face hard, yanking him close with your palm cupped over his mouth with your other hand cupping the nape of his neck. His eyes rolled into the back of his head, falling further into your shoulder and bracing under the new wave of arousal while his thrusts quickened with desperation. “That’s it, baby.” You whispered, struggling to keep quiet yourself. “That’s it, good boy, sweetheart…fuck-”

X -X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words) - Team cloaca. He has a cloaca just under the plates of his plastron. His dick is HUGE, and gorgeously dark purple, and there is a reason it needs to be packed away. It takes a lot of time and a lot of patience, even with the assist of his and your natural lubrication, it takes a while to get his huge size inside of you. 

Y - Yearning (How high is their sex drive) - In the beginning, you are all Donnie could think about. He wanted you so badly, and he wanted you to want him. He had trouble focusing on tasks he had never had a problem focusing on before. He wasn’t getting things done, he was messing up more during training, and he had troubles not talking about you to others. But after things have been official for a while, that fades to a much more healthy amount. But he does have an issue getting lost in his interests, projects and duties. His sex drive is high, but he has attention issues lol. 

Z - ZZZ (How quickly they fall asleep afterwards) - Donnie is a sleep deprived monster. While he can continue on after sex as if nothing happened (he does that a lot), sex is one of the only things that will actually put him to sleep quickly. So if that is your objective, after he orgasms…when he’s still shaky and out of breath- all you gotta do is rub his shoulders, kiss his face and pull him into a tight hug, prevent him from getting too goofy, and it’s over. If you are under him, he can fall asleep on top of you. If you two are curled up in the lab chair, he will pass out with his head on your shoulder. If you guys are on the couch, he will drop out, his mouth open and glasses skewed with you on his chest. He is always a hard sleeper, so getting him to wake up especially after a good fuck- is damn near impossible. But it’s also something that honestly, while you stare down at his cute face snoozing away, waking him up is the last thing that you want to do. 

[liquorishblack]

Inside the twisted mind of Hisoka Morow (part 2)

Relationship headcanon

Before you start reading, you should definitely check out part 1 , so you can understand my reasoning a little bit better.♡

Part 1 , Part 2

Synopsis: What a relationship with Hisoka Morow would look like, from sweet beginning to bitter end.

Genre: nsfw!, fluff, angst, headcanon, psychoanalysis, a little bit of everything

Reader: genderneutral

TW: nsfw!, mentions of: physical abuse, emotional abuse, manipulation, violence, murder, blood, sex, size kink, bdsm, praise, humiliation, cheating, trauma, mental illness ... basically everything, it's Hisoka after all

Wordcount: 5.066

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Part 1 already checked? Yes? Then let's get started...

Theoretical babble aside, now we´re getting on to the practice… so, what would a relationship with Hisoka Morow look like from sweet beginning to bitter end? Here we go…

Get to know him:

As for his prey pattern one might think that the only two things important to him are 1) at least one hole and 2) pulse. But that´s far from the truth! Hisoka has strong narcissistic traits, so it will be important for him to be able to decorate himself with his newest conquest, just like with an expensive accessory. So he´s quite superficial when it comes to picking his next target. 

If you manage to attract his attention, it will be quite easy to „get to know“ him in a sense of „he only shows you of his what he wants you to see“, but you wouldn´t even be able to notice since he´s an outstanding liar and manipulator. For you, it will seem as if you are talking to an open-minded gentleman. If you fall into his pattern, he will - after observing you for a while - approach you in polite and friendly manner and open the conversation... probably with a pick up line that makes you cringe, laugh and blush at the same time. Since Hisoka is a sweet talker, he´ll have no difficulties to convince you, to go out with him, but there are occasions when wine and dine seems like a big waste of time to him. He has better stuff to do after all. In this case he´ll straight up ask you to hop under the sheets with him, cause he doesn´t feel shame either. If your answer is "no", he will, without deterioration, fly on to the next little flower and since he's a good looking gent, sooner or later this strategy will lead to success. But if he is bored anyway and looking for entertainment, you´re in for a date with a gentleman par excellence. The path of doors being held open, food at his expense, and a bunch of compliments is the most straightforward right into your pants, after all. 

After a nice evening out he'll get down to business relatively quickly back at home - if you two even get there before he gets to the nitty gritty. He doesn´t shy away from PDA after all, since he is in fact completely shameless (neither has he empathy for you, nor for himself) and since he´s quite exhibitionistic, it might even turn him on.

When it comes to sex, it would be better, if you don't care about your physical integrity too much… since he has self control, he won´t hurt you seriously, but like I´ve mentioned before, this man needs strong stimuli to get *all excited*. But if you´re down for his messed up shenanigans, such as bdsm and bloodplay, you´ll enter an extatic world of domination and devotion, pleasure and pain, denial and overstimulation, humiliation and praise. And since promiscuity is quite a common trait of people who fall under the ASPD spectrum, he has plenty of experience and knows exactly what he´s doing and how to please you. For him sex is - besides the fun it is by itself - also a tool for boosting his ego. He just loves to see the impact his cock and his little tricks have on you and he will watch your facial expressions while fucking your brains out with great enthusiasm and pleasure. Only when you´re a total mess, he will allow himself to release and give you some rest. If he really likes you, you can expect at least some kind of aftercare, to make sure you´ll sleep with him again, just in case he decides wanting to do so. It´s an opportunity nice to have after all. If you´re just a random hookup, a towel is all you get… if you ask for it very nicely. He likes to see you suffer and he´s big on teasing and humiliating after all. 

Dating-Phase:

Honestly, when it comes to relationships of any kind, casually hooking up is as uncomplicated as an interaction with Hisoka can get - as long as you can keep up with his kinks to say the least. You two meet, he´ll fuck you senseless and afterwards you both go separate ways as nothing ever happened. That's probably how most of his „relationships“ will go. They serve their purpose and are uncomplicated … just according to his taste. 

But what if the thought of your sweaty skin against his, the sound of your greedy moans and the sensation of your nails, digging into his flesh, while you´re silky wet insides clench around his cock won´t leave his mind no matter what, even long after you´ve left?

Chances are high, that such a twist of events would happen with a s/o who is quite unaffectionate. See, Hisoka seems to like a good chase as he makes advances towards Machi over and over again and this would even match up with the theory I mentioned in part 1, that Hisoka was in fact a neglected child. When it comes to love relationships, it can be quite instructive to look at the earliest relationships we all had: Namely, those to our primary caregivers. Hisoka simps for a woman who doesn´t give a shit about him, because that´s probably the kind of ��love“ he experienced at an early age. So chances are, that he has infact mommy- or daddy-issues, probably both. As Alain de Botton once said: „We don´t fall in love first and foremost with those who care for us in ideal ways, we fall in love with those who care for us in familiar ways“ (Adaption Level Theory). Furthermore people who shy away from intimacy, because it means making oneself vulnerable, tend to chase after individuals, whose affection is unattainable (such as Hisoka does with Machi), since there is no danger from a relationship that will never come about. In these cases psychology talks about different attachment-styles and attachment-disorders. But back to topic: It's very unusual for Hisoka to have his bed-bunnies still haunting his mind after he have had his fun, so this keeps him guessing… 

Probably out of curiosity and ambition to get what he wants, since he´s an opportunist and at this stage might not think about the consequences (like he could fall in love, common, this is ridiculous), he´ll reach out to you again and observe… observe what it is, that you do to him and how he reacts to it, how it makes him feel, just to wrap his head around what is happening. His search for an answer can already take on obsessive traits, because in such an unfamiliar situation Hisoka is confronted with the old familiar feeling of loss of control once again. His ambition will be to regain control, but this endeavor will automatically lead to a conflict of interests: he has a crush on you, he wants to spent time with you, hold you and be near you, just as anyone would, when you grew quite fond of someone. But at the same time his danger-radar screams at the top of it´s lungs „JUST THE FUCK LEAVE, MAN“!, which he actually will do! Over and over again. 

In this early phase he will disappear on you often… ghost you for days, weeks, even months. And this, my friend, believe me, will get you hooked. Those push & pull or hot & cold tactics are even used by those dubious dating coaches and you know what? THEY WORK! The culprit in this case is in fact the dopaminergic system. Since we are human beings and therefore social creatures, attention makes us happy - especially if it´s given to us by a good-looking jester. But the moment Hisoka disappears on you, without any shitty excuse even, you´re lacking your daily dose of dopamine, which in fact can lead to withdrawal-like phenomena on a psychological level. Even if you were not so much into him from the beginning, now you´ll be craving your next hit like a junky in rehab. You´ll question yourself, why he got blank on you so sudden… did you do something wrong? Did he find someone better than you? Does he do this to you on purpose? Even a certain sense of ambition can be triggered by this whimsical behavior. With everything you do, you´ll try desperately, to get his attention back, just to get your ego at ease.

So, this bastard got you hooked, not even because this was his intention in first place (not that he would mind either), but because of his own insecurity, which he would never ever show to you, since it´s an admission of weakness and this would give you power over him. Power, he doesn´t want you to have, since he doesn´t trust anyone. You on the other hand will notice anything of that said insecurity. All you see is a fuckboy, who goes blanc on you and uses you like a toy. Your meetings are of fire and passion, while the dead end silence in between will evoke an excruciating sense of longing. Not so much for him, since he doesn´t have great access to his emotion, but you, my dear, are fucked at this point. And so it goes on for a while…

Feelings arise:

We value things, that make our everyday life easier and keep boredom at bay. If you manage to entertain Hisoka to a sufficient degree, he might decide to keep you. Spending time with you, feels always nice - no matter if you´re out on the streets, visiting an amusement park or just chilling on the couch. You have a great sense of dark humor that makes him laugh and he´s somewhat impressed by your high intellect. Sometimes he just sits their, watching you scrolling through your phone, admiring your beauty and wondering, what’s on your mind. Although he's good at reading people, you seem to be somewhat unconventional in your way of thinking - unpredictable even. You don't exactly make it easy for him to see right through you, but that´s what makes you so interesting to him. You are a challenge, which he doesn´t stumble upon often. And you give him sass! You´re not afraid of talking back and speak for yourself, traits he always appreciates. Your attitude somewhat humors him. Somehow Hisoka enjoys the danger radiating from your innocent face (again: Your behavior gives him a sense of insecurity, never knowing where he stands with you - a feeling he is familiar with from childhood days). 

Also the genuine acts of affection and kindness you show towards him, will leave him wondering: He isn´t used to being taken care of. Most people avoid him, so every time you snug up to him for a hug or say something nice to him (and he can sense that you mean it) it leaves him somewhat pleasantly surprised. 

You help him to fill the void inside of him, an ever-bleeding wound, that tears open again, as soon as you are not near him and he´s confronted with his inner emptiness again. This comforting feeling you give him, he no longer wants to miss and so it happens, that he develops some sense of care for you. He wants you to be happy, because when you´re in a good mood, you are most entertaining to him. He wants you to be safe, so many more shared nights are guaranteed. 

You might have noticed a slightly egoistic tinge to these motifs… this is, because they are. This is what Hisokas „love“ will be like. Don´t get me wrong, he will do everything to make you happy and more. He will help you become the best version of yourself you can be and he´s the wind beneath your wings, there is no doubt about that. But Hisokas love will always be conditionally. 

(If love is ever unconditional - mother love aside - is a topic for itself, I personally don´t think so and therefore wouldn´t mind, but anyway).  

In this phase he might consider to disappear on you and this time it would be final, but that would mean losing you, even risking, that you would move on easily and he can´t have that. So he stays. 

Hisoka would never ever be verbal about his feelings at an so early stage. He´ll show his affection for you with, of course, physical touch (believe me, you guys will always have physical contact in some way or another), gifts and quality time - acts of services not so much, but occasions might occur.

If he happens to really fall in love with you (not crushing on you like before, I mean truthful deep feelings), this is when things can potentially get dangerous. When stronger feelings arise, it means that Hisoka has lost control and as said before, he can´t have that. He will consider leaving you once again, but feelings are stronger than ratio at times, so again, he stays. 

Now remember why Hisoka doesn´t like the feeling of losing control in the first place: because it makes him vulnerable. It puts him into a position, he isn´t used to. You have the power to hurt him now, not physically (let´s be honest here, he wouldn´t mind that anyway, it would even turn him on), but emotionally, which is were his real weakness lies. As he´s afraid that you could abuse your power and actually hurt him, he will do everything he can, to avoid that from happening. Since he´s quite overwhelmed by this unfamiliar experience, cause he isn´t used to having someone he cares about, expect whimsical and impulsive behavior - but to an extent that goes far beyond what you are already used to from him by now. Just multiply those hisokaesque-traits with 10. His antics will align with his emotional state and therefore become even more unpredictable and uncontrollable. 

At times he might try to push you away, maybe by being nasty and saying such hurtful things, that make you consider leaving and never coming back. Without doing it on purpose, you´ll probably touch old wounds of him and make them bleed again. That´s just how relationships are… people who share a great deal of emotional intimacy, trigger and hurt each other from time to time, which in itself is not a big deal, if it weren´t for Hisoka we´re talking about. 

Sometimes he might even hate you for making him fall in love with you. For making him feel weak and therefore turning his world upside down, which he absolutely hates at times. If he´s feeling unsure about the relationship or - even worse - about your feelings towards him (not because of you doing something wrong, it can be external circumstances as well), this will throw him off. 

Giving him the cold shoulder, like you did in the dating phase, is only good as long he hasn´t invested much, but when feelings come up, that's a big no-no. Jealousy might be a problem as well and yet again, since it´s Hisoka we´re talking about, this might go hand in hand with stalking, obsessive and even possessive behavior, since he can´t find the ability to trust in himself. 

It will be your task to show and teach him, how to trust and to convince him, that you can be trusted and for that I hope you have the patience of a saint. Even though from the outside Hisoka seems quite self-confident, remember that this might be a mask. This man has definitely an inflated ego, which is often based on feelings of inferiority. As he has narcissistic traits, he´s highly dependent on external confirmation. The chasing phase is over, so now he wants to be treated. You better look up to him and show him your love and respect as much as you can. Praise him, make sure that he knows that you´re feelings are genuine. Make him feel safe in your arms. Hold him, don´t push him away, even if he can be clingy and a bit much at times. 

At that early stage he needs to be your No.1 priority. Don´t dare to ignore him or hurt his ego. Don´t lie to him. This man will notice immediately and get back at you tenfold and he does not shy away from acting up, just to get your attention back, that´s sure as hell. Nothing feels worse to him then not being seen and feeling neglected, since this triggers his childhood trauma. Also, if he gets a reaction out you, that must mean, that you do still care about him, doesn´t it? The bigger your reaction, the better. In this early stage of you´re relationship it is most likely you, who gives the biggest investment, since out of the fear of being hurt, he´s still holding back. But if you´re able to deal with his antics for a distant span of time, this might change. In this early stage he feels best, when you are around him (where he can see and control you, making sure that you don´t dare to act irresponsible with the heart of his in your hands) and therefore he´ll try to have you near him as much as possible.

On a more positive note, I don´t see Hisoka as a physically violent man, unless you ask him nicely about it. He will push boundaries, that´s fore sure, but never to such an extend, that´ll make you leave, since that´s quite the opposite of what he wants. He wants to convince you of what he already knows: namely, that he is the best you´ll ever have. Hisoka is a passionate and sensual man after all, so you´re in for treatment as it would be worthy of a queen/king. Flowers, exciting dates, romantic dinners (hell, he would even cook for you), lots of childish shenanigans like dancing through the sleeping streets and pillow fights after hot and sweaty hours under the sheets. As trust growths, you´ll see more of his soft side and you´ll be surprised how gentle Hisoka can be during intimate hours. He´ll praise you as well, since he wants you to feel good around him. Many many compliments, passionate kisses all over your body, especially on your neck (he´ll definitely mark you as his property), soft caresses and cuddles on end, just holding you close to him for hours. Just for you. Just to make you happy. Just to make you his. At this time he´s more than willing to let troupe duties and even fights in heavens arena slide, just for a lovely and cozy night in, cuddling, giggling and playing cards with you.

Established Relationship:

If he would ever officially propose in case of verbalizing, that you two are in fact in a relationship, is questionable, but his wall is getting cracks already and therefore you´ll get to know his real self more and more over time. He´s no longer the outgoing jokester who teases you all the time (ok, lets be honest here, he´ll stiIl tease you every now and then, he always will, because that´s how he is), but you´ll see a more introverted side of his, which comes along with a certain softness. More often he´s more quiet than loud and he´ll just listen to you for hours, while his bedroomed gaze rests on you attentively. You got his full attention as well as his heart. He cares about you, so he is interested in what you have to say. 

But the longer you guys are in a relationship, the bigger of a challenge it will be, not to bore him. He´s volatile after all and it´s highly possible that he nostalgically remembers his times as a lone wolf sometimes. 

If bored, he might start arguments out of the blue, just to make things more exciting… and fighting with Hisoka is very unpleasant to say the least. He is bratty, arrogant, petty and has a hard time apologizing. He will only do so, if he wants something from you. He´ll gaslight and manipulate the shit out of you, just for you to feel sorry in the end, doesn´t matter, if you did something wrong or not. In addition your guilt will get him lots of make up sex and sloppy heads afterwards, which is always nice to have. However, these are just squabbles we are talking about… a real argument will look extremely different. 

Hisoka has the patience of a saint and nothing makes him fly off the handle so easily (which is quite unusual for people who suffer ASPD tbh). But one thing that will push him over the edge is you being reckless with your own physical well-being… or you flirting with Chrollo, which threatens his ego, cause this man might even be stronger and therefore more impressive to you than Hisoka himself (which he will obviously never ever admit, so he would find some other shitty reasons to justify his anger). When Hisoka snaps, bloodlust oozes from him and the possibility exists that he´ll put you into your place with harsh words spoken in a stern voice, maybe even screaming at you, which might scare you, since he´s quite intimidating in this emotional state. He does this, because by putting yourself in danger, you are endangering himself, too. He doesn´t want to lose you because of some unnecessary incident that could´ve been avoided easily after all, so he´s quite protective when it comes to you. 

Also frustration might push him over the edge. He´s not used to not getting what he wants and has his difficulties with terms like „no“. Since he respects you, he won´t cross any major lines, but he´ll push your boundaries and manipulate you into giving him, what he wants. Let's call it psychological warfare. If you somehow manage to hurt his feelings, he´ll go cold on you, pout and even ignore you for hours, days or weeks, depending of how much he´s hurting. Not because he´s so resentful, but because he wants you to feel sorry for what you´ve done to him. When he´s ready to talk to you again, you´ll have to apologize in very very sweet tounges to get back into his good grace.

So, to keep boredom and unnecessary quarrels at bay, it is important that you both find ways to spice things up a little. Now that he has a certain sense of security when it comes to you, you should also lead a more self-determined life again, at least to a certain degree. Don´t be to needy. Don´t run after him. Give him his space and try to find the trust that he´ll come back to you... even though there will never be a guarantee that he does. But give him the chance to miss you, to be longing for your touch, as he´s on his missions and you are mining your own business. 

Also you´ll need a high libido to keep up with his insatiable needs, not just during the honeymoon phase, also beyond. Otherwise you´re taking the risk, that he goes elsewhere to get what he needs. I don´t think that Hisoka is big in monogamy when your relationship has been going on for a while… at least when it comes to him. And that´s a problem: He might look after other (wo)men or even consider „cheating“ on you (unless you aren´t fine with an open relationship), but I think his ego might get in the way, when you express the desire to sleep with other (wo)men as well, which is quite unfair, but that´s how he ticks. Maybe consider visiting swingerclubs or participating in threesomes every now and then, as a compromise. It is important, however, that you only get your appetite elsewhere, but always always always eat at home! Don´t deflate this mans ego. This would be a thing you might regret later. If he catches you cheating, he´ll be furious and I don't know how you could, or if you ever could, make up for that. He will definitely kill the person you cheated on him with and I think this could be one of the rare occasions, where he might turn even violent against you. Just to make sure that you´ll never ever dare to do this again. If he decides to keep you despite the cheating, he will treat you like a good-for-nothing slave for the next few weeks, just to make you suffer and get back at you. As for building trust on his side, you can start from 0 again at this point, as you can imagine. Also I should mention, that if Hisoka ever cheats on you, that doesn´t mean that he does not love you. Sex and feelings are two completely different things to him. Therefore his anger in case of you cheating, isn´t based on severe heartbreak, it´s in fact his ego, that is hurting. As if he's not enough and all you need.

I´ve talked about Hisoka pushing boundaries before, but just to make clear what could come along with it: There might be occasions when he comes home after one of his fights, emotionally still heavily loaded and in the mood to celebrate his success, aka break someone. This energy needs to go somewhere and since you´re sleeping right over there so peacefully, you´re the perfect target. He will take what he craves and just destroy you in the most pleasant way possible.

So he comes home in the middle of the night, highly aroused, and will wake you up by indulging your crotch with fiery kisses, bloodlust dripping from his tongue, and greedy blood stained touches. He´ll bend you over and start thrusting into you merciless, without giving you the chance to come to your senses first. All you feel is his hard pulsating cock stretching your insides, his tight grip around your waist, sharp nails digging into your flesh and the cold blood of his enemies dripping onto your hot skin.

These are occasions when sex feels best to him. Every single thrust inside your clenching walls sends shocks right through his body, making him feel more and more extatic with every second. He is completely in charge, not just over you, but also over his opponent, who is most likely already dead by this time. His orgasms are intense in this state of mind and he´ll sure as hell not be satisfied by filling you up just once. After he has absolutely destroyed your downstairs, he´s finally satisfied and will just lay there, with you on his chest, admiring of how much a mess his cock made you become, and enjoy the soothing calmness that floods his body instead of bloodlust. He´ll listen to your soft and exhausted snores until he falls in a deep and dreamless sleep, just like you did, the moment he pulled out of you. 

And that is what I mean when saying, he´ll push boundaries. The longer the two of you are together and the more secure you make him feel, the less he needs to fear that you´ll leave by the moment, he shows his real self to you. For the first time in his life he feels accepted as he is… loved even. You stayed. No matter how much of his deviant personality traits he had shown to you and despite the many times he pushed you away. And therefore he´ll be forever grateful. 

Breakup:

Is „forever“ even a possibility with Hisoka? I´m not sure about that, to be honest. That would require that you both grow together, to support each other in the fight against the inner demons that I'm sure you both have, otherwise you wouldn't have played along with his games for so long. So always remember: „I´ll admit, I have my issues, but you are just as bad“. Even if the possibility exists, I find it hard to imagine that Hisoka would attend trauma-therapy and engage in inner child work. In addition to that, it would take him years, to put down his mask to such an extend, that he´ll open up about his past, if it ever happens. Also, even if he does, this could cause an initial deterioration of his condition, which could have disastrous consequences. For both of you. Therefore, some things might better stay untouched, otherwise they might break you.

Also, I don´t think that the chances of a consensual break up, without any drama or heartbreak, are very high. What ever the reasons might be, if Hisoka is the one being hurt, he might decide to kill you. Not because of hatred (unless you have treated him tremendously wrong), but because of safety reasons and therefore it´ll still hurt him like a bitch. It would be a scene as tragic as from a love drama. He would hold your lifeless bleeding body until it gets cold, kiss your soft lips as your last breath leaves your lungs and gently close those your/eyecolor eyes, he lost himself in so many times. He might even shed a solitary tear. Whatever happened between the two of you, you showed him, what love is, and therefore he´ll never forget you. But it just had to be. In the end, you two didn´t work and you just know too much, to keep wandering this planet. He has many enemies after all and with your connection, the trust in you, that you won´t use your power against him one day, is broken. Depending on the circumstances, he might decide to never love again.

༻✦༺

♠ „Farewell, my dear. Too bad, it didn´t work out. We just weren´t meant to be… and still, you´re the only one, I´ve ever loved and therefore I´ll never forget you.“, he says, plenting a last heartfelt kiss on your forehead, before he leaves. ♠

༻✦༺

The End.

TYSM for reading!🫶🏻 You made it till the end, so you deserve a flower.❀ If you enjoyed my writing, feel free to send me requests, I'm always grateful for some inspiration. - Yours truly, Ava 🤍

[heliads]

Hii! Here we go, a request for Kaz x reader based on the song "Later never comes" from Scrooge. I think it could go in so many ways and I'm really excited to see what you envision for this particular fic!! Your writing never ceases to amaze me Lisa! Once again, thank you for listening!!😌✨️ (little kaz gif for inspiration)

what a song for what a man

masterlist

Kaz Brekker is not the type for pretty sentiment nor glowing praise. It is notoriously difficult to be near him as anything more than an enemy, which is part of what makes the Dregs so deadly as a gang. If they can put up with Dirtyhands for months at a time without losing their minds or their will to live, well, they can do just about anything. So they do.

You, then, are a wholly different substance. Not only are you Kaz’s friend, you’re in a relationship with him. Every damned soul this side of the True Sea and half those on the foreign shores, too, know not to mess with Kaz’s girl. You convinced the coldest heart in the world to fall in love, that must count for something.

You’d like it to count for something, at least, and at the beginning, it did. You and Kaz were unstoppable. He had a goal to rise above the ranks of petty thugs and street criminals, to lead the best Barrel gang and crush the others while he was at it. You helped him with it, and swore to be by his side until the sky finally fell.

It was good back then. More simple than now, at least, although it didn’t feel that way. What you’ve learned since those early days is that money tends to bring more trouble than anyone expects. Sure, as someone who’ll be a canal rat from their first breath until their last, you appreciate being able to have food in your stomach and a warm roof to keep you dry more than anyone, but you also know what it did to Kaz, and that’s something terrible, too.

The problem with finally getting to the top is that you have to stay there as well. Kaz spends every waking moment scouting out his enemies, making sure they’re too weak to stand against him and fighting them off if they ever reach that point. He runs through his sums and profits until the numbers swim behind his eyes. Business is booming, he’s recruiting more loyal soldiers by the day, and through all of it, he makes less and less time for you by the hour.

You knew exactly what to expect when you fell in love with Kaz in the first place. Greed is his god, his servant, his lever, his only reason for existence. He likes to say that he controls it, but it controls him just as much. Remove gold from Kaz and his entire empire plummets. You share that too, you loved him just enough to keep making excuses for his wealth knowing it would fill your pockets too, but you’re reaching your limit.

You didn’t think you could feel lonely in a city like this. The Barrel is crawling with people of every kind, saints and sinners and criminals such as yourself. The Slat alone is filled to the brim with the other Dregs. You’ve befriended as many as you could stomach, using their teasing banter to fill the increasing gap between your ribs that Kaz had once filled.

Even stepping outside the door has you washed away in a flood of conversation. Dozens of languages spin from hundreds of windows. Walk two streets down and it’s as if you’ve crossed five national borders. Ketterdam is a thriving mess of rotten civilization, thousands of souls spilling between your fingers wherever you go. It has never been quiet, and when the silence threatens to tear you apart, constant noise is here whenever you need it.

Recently, you’ve relied on that ceaseless din more than ever before. You talk to your friends, you complete your jobs, you count your coin just like your boyfriend, but it doesn’t stop you from remembering how it had felt to have Kaz back with you. You used to spend hours with him in his study, both of you poring through documents or mapping out a future.

Now, you can hardly take a step into his study without him asking you to leave him be. You’re not the only one facing his wrath; Inej and Jesper have also shared similar stories, but it hits doubly hard when you remember that you’re supposed to be the one easing the pain from Kaz’s life. Every time you try to reach out, he cuts you off with a blow of business and profits. There’s just no getting through to him.

So, you start pulling yourself back as well. The separation doesn’t hurt nearly as much if you stop giving Kaz chances to reject you again and again. You stop taking the rickety steps up to Kaz’s office, he never visited you anyway, so why should you waste your time on something he clearly doesn’t want? Kaz never leaves his work for meals, so you stop inviting him to eat with you. Might as well save your breath for people who’ll listen to you.

Inej knows how you feel, of course she does. There has yet to be a secret in this world hidden from the Wraith, and yours are no exception. She picked up on your gloom in about half a second, even before you realized how much you were hurting from Kaz’s absence. 

She encouraged you to tell Kaz how you felt, insisting that Kaz was unaware of many human emotions, and he wasn’t likely to realize you were unhappy unless you told him. You tried many times and gave up after the ninth attempt. Each time you began that conversation, he dismissed you with a wave of his hand and a new excuse about work consuming his time yet again.

So you stopped trying. It’s funny, you’ve never had a problem with persistence in your life. The Barrel was not made for those who lay down and die after the smallest grievance. You clawed your way up to survive with bleeding palms, yet it is Kaz’s slights that hurt you like nothing else.

Every day feels like a fresh blow, knowing that he’s in the very same building as you yet refuses to see you for a second. After suffering death by a thousand cuts for the third month in a row, your broken heart slowly realizes what it has to do. If you want to live with the slimmest chance of happiness, you have to remove yourself from a situation in which you are not your lover’s priority.

There’s a train heading towards the rural, central parts of Kerch, closer to Belendt than Ketterdam. You’ve booked yourself passage there. A good opportunity awaits you:  there’s a small hospital that’s found itself frantically growing. In need of a new owner, it sent out ads that reached your ears. As someone with a deep knowledge of crime and danger, someone who isn’t likely to be intimidated by threats by rivals, you’re a top candidate. You applied and heard back almost immediately with a resounding yes.

Just before you accepted the job and left, you gave Kaz one more chance. This time, you aren’t going to swallow back your words, even when he tries to dismiss you at the door. You knock once at his office door, balling your hands into fists at your sides for some semblance of strength before letting yourself inside.

Kaz looks up briefly, but you don’t think his eyes even manage to make it all the way up to yours before they snap back to the mess of papers in front of him. “Now isn’t a good time, Y/N.”

You clear your throat. “It needs to be now. There’s something you need to know.”

He sighs, still staring at the addendums to this month’s sums. “Does it have to do with business?”

“Yes and no,” you begin, but Kaz cuts you off.

“If it’s not urgent, it’s going to be a problem for later. I don’t have time for lesser concerns.” He says.

You refuse to move. “Later isn’t really a thing for you, Kaz. We’ve been waiting on later for months.”

“Have we?” He asks. As you watch, his attention slips away from you like grains of sand down an hourglass. Before your very eyes, he’s almost forgotten you’re there.

You take a breath in and out, then force yourself to speak again. “There’s a hospital in central Kerch in need of an owner. I’m moving out to take the position. This is the first time I’ve ever left Ketterdam, but it’s going to be good. It’s a lovely place, and the patients are in need of help. It’s a very nice opportunity.”

“Yes,” Kaz mutters absently, “very nice.”

You blink at him in surprise, but realize that he’s just parroting your words back at you. Despite the fact that you just confessed to leaving him behind, Kaz hasn’t picked up on a single syllable out of line. This is the last sign you need to know that you need to go. This is not a place where you are the center of anyone’s attention, so you might as well find somewhere else where you are.

“Goodbye, Kaz,” you say at last.

He doesn’t even manage a cohesive phrase in farewell, just keeps his eyes studiously scanning the page until the door closes behind you. Inej is waiting in the hall outside, perched up on the railing of the staircase.

“Well?” She asks hopefully, legs swinging in the air, “how’d it go?”

You shake your head tersely. “He didn’t even listen. I told him I was finding a new job and nothing happened.”

Inej’s face falls. “No. I really thought he’d react to that, but he didn’t in the slightest?”

“Not at all,” you confirm, “and that’s it, I think. There’s a train headed out tomorrow, I already bought my ticket.”

Inej’s lips twist into a frown. “You knew he wouldn’t respond?”

You nod. “Of course he wouldn’t. Kaz is Kaz, he was never meant to love someone like me. I don’t know what I was thinking to believe I could be the exception, but I was wrong. Kaz doesn’t want someone like that, certainly not me.”

“That just means he’s blind,” Inej declares, “you’re better than he deserves, Y/N. I’m sorry he can’t see that.”

“I’m sorry too,” you exhale, “but it’s over now.”

And so it is. You wake up early to catch your train, and Inej insists on seeing you off. You think she’s doing it in some part to convince you to stay, but your mind is made up. This is not a home for you, not anymore. Not until the people you love come to love you back once again. Until then, you need to clear your head by leaving.

You give Inej your address, just in case. If there was anyone in this world you’d trust to keep your secret, it would be her. She waves goodbye until the train disappears around the corner and you can see her no longer. After that, you’re left to the great unknown. You can only hope that it will hold half the contentment you’ve been missing for so long.

…

Something is wrong, and Kaz knows it. The feeling has been itching at him for days now, this unsettling sensation telling him that all is not right in his world. Kaz does not like this feeling, he never has. Dirtyhands is always in control of his surroundings; Fate bows to him, that’s how it has always been. Even when he’s temporarily down, Kaz can conjure up a solution to fix whatever comes his way.

It would be nice, then, if he could figure out what the issue was. Kaz rarely has trouble immersing himself in anything but work, but he finds himself unable to focus now. Even the allure of more jobs and more kruge cease to luster in the same way.

After what is probably a shamefully long time, it occurs to Kaz that he hasn’t seen Y/N in quite a while. She usually drops by his office with a word of good news or a smile, bright spots in the midst of this gleefully dismal city, but Kaz doesn’t think he’s seen her in days. Since that feeling of trouble started, actually.

In a place like the Barrel, unsettling coincidences and strange absences usually mean someone has been murdered, so Kaz doesn’t think he’ll be able to rest until he has confirmation that Y/N is alright. Despite his best attempts at making sure he has no weakness, he can decisively say that Y/N would be just that. His traitorous heart has a way of skipping a beat when she’s around, a habit he tried to cure himself of at least a dozen times yet just made stronger by the day.

Yes, he needs her, and yes, her lack of visibility in his life is most certainly messing with his head. Kaz departs his office and heads down the stairs to her room in the Slat. He knocks once, waits, hears nothing, then knocks again. Of course, it is no trouble at all to assume that Y/N is merely busy or out on some other job, but for some reason Kaz gets the feeling this isn’t the case.

For one thing, there are no lights on inside, not even a small oil lamp left to heat the place. For another, Jesper accidentally upset an inkwell on this stairwell a while ago, and judging by the pool of black still undisturbed by her threshold, no one has entered or left this door in a couple of days.

Kaz is seriously starting to worry now. There’s one person who knows everything in this place, so he turns to track down Inej in the hopes of finding out if she’s seen anything. When he looks back towards the stairs, though, he realizes that she’s beat him to the punch. Inej has appeared out of the gloom to lean against the stairwell, eyes wide and expectant.

Kaz’s fingers harden around the crow’s head of his cane. “What do you know?” He asks, cutting to the chase.

Inej arches a brow. “About what?”

His eyes narrow. “Don’t feign ignorance, Inej, I know you have some hand in this. Where is Y/N?”

Inej folds her arms across her chest. “You know, I was wondering how long it would take you to notice.”

Kaz doesn’t remember walking over to her, only that he blinks and he’s looming over her, the slow cold of rage icing over his veins. “Wraith, I am not in the mood for games. Tell me where Y/N is or–”

Inej has rarely been frightened of him, and she certainly isn’t now. “Or what, Kaz, you’ll ignore her again? Do you know how long Y/N has been coming to me, distraught because you refuse to give her the time of day? She’s been trying for so long to convince you to love her, and she left because she realized that you never would.”

Kaz feels thunderstruck. “What do you mean she left? And why would she think that?”

Inej gives him one of her knowing looks. “Y/N wanted to find someplace she could live where the people around her wouldn’t push her away every time she spoke to them. And don’t glare at me like that, Brekker, because I tried to talk her out of it so many times. That’s more than you, by the way. She told you she was leaving straight to your face and you didn’t even notice.”

Kaz opens his mouth to say that’s not true, that he would absolutely have picked up on Y/N mentioning that, and then he remembers the last time she dropped by his office. He’d been distracted by reports that Pekka’s profits had been growing. She had something about— about— a hospital, yes, that was it, someplace nice. She was going someplace nice, and he hadn’t realized it in the slightest. 

Kaz raises a gloved hand to his temple. “She said goodbye and I acted like nothing happened. Kept telling her we’d talk later.”

Inej nods knowingly. “Later never comes, Kaz. None of us have time for such promises.”

He scowls at her. It’s always easier to hate someone else than himself, although he can’t quite manage it now.  “Alright, then, if I wanted to go about fixing things, how would I do it? Where is she?”

Inej refuses to divulge that information quite yet. “Do you really want to fix things? You spent all this time ignoring her. Why should you force your way back into her life just to do it again in a couple more months?”

Kaz sighs, the ghostly sound of his regrets leaving him in the same manner as a soul:  all yearning, all hopeless musing that nothing will ever be better. “Because now I know what it’s like to be without her, and I don’t ever want to do that again.”

“Even for kruge?” Inej asks, still suspicious. 

“Even for kruge,” Kaz answers, fighting a bitter taste in the back of his throat. Is he really so predictable that she’d have to ask?

Inej eyes him a moment longer, then sighs and relents. “Alright, then. What you’re going to want to do is take a train south, away from the city…”

Kaz hasn’t thought about leaving the Barrel in quite some time. He almost doubted he could leave, like the city has such a deep chokehold on him that his lungs would give out the second he passed the borders of Ketterdam. Forget the fact that he’s been as far as Fjerda, Ravka, and the like; abandoning the Barrel to some distant whiff of grime and penance behind him feels like some unnameable sin. 

The feeling lessens the further he gets into the country. The rolling hills and clear skies remind him of a different time in his life, a different last name. Rietveld, not Brekker. A simple schoolboy, not an immoral conman. If Kaz were to see the boy he’d once been on the streets today, he’d probably rob him blind without a second thought. That’s what had happened to him. It’s what happens to them all. Something is taken from you, you get your revenge by taking from someone else. So the cycle continues.

Out here, though, the relentless surge of predator and prey seems farther away. Its claws slack, its hold on Kaz grows thin and tenuous. Before he knows it, he’s blinking in the bright sunlight of a Kerch that has not been his in quite some time. He was never supposed to go back. Not alone, at least.

He isn’t alone, though. He’s here for somebody. Kaz managed to pry the name of the hospital out of Inej, and he asks for directions from a nearby locomotive worker. After that, it’s just a matter of hitching a ride and heading over.

The hospital is quite busy, but even amidst the hustle and bustle, Kaz spots Y/N immediately. She’s writing down notes on a book cradled in her arms, calling out directions to people as she passes them by. Kaz takes one hesitant step forward, then two, and she sees him at last.

He’d like to say that one look at her made the uproar around him die down. Instead, he thinks it doubled in volume. The shrieks of children with sprained ankles are amplified by the erratic beating of Kaz’s heart. Younger patients swarm around him, and maybe it’s just the threat that one of them will bump into him out of nowhere but Kaz swears he starts seeing ice water instead of warm air, and limp, plague-ridden bodies instead of groaning victims. 

One elderly man with a broken leg weakly closes his eyes to preserve strength and Kaz feels his entire system lock down. Suddenly, he’s no longer Kaz Brekker, man on a mission, but the younger Rietveld boy, doomed to drown with the rest of the corpses in a city on fire.

Just when he’s sure he’s going to implode, Y/N is in front of him, somehow clearing a path across the busy scene. She gestures for him to follow and Kaz does, not trusting himself to speak lest the bile in his blood finally come out. 

Only once they’re alone in a room with the door closed can Kaz finally begin to breathe. “I came for you,” he manages to gasp out.

Y/N nods, eyeing him hesitantly as if she expects him to run. “I didn’t know if you would.”

Kaz is not so far gone that he can’t feel a pang of hurt at her words. “I didn’t realize I had sunk so low in your opinion.”

Y/N purses her lips. “I always had a high opinion of you. Months of you ignoring me, though, that made it hard to stick around.”

Kaz nods once, a mechanical motion. “You’re certainly receiving a fair amount of attention here.”

He’s not sure if he means it as a jab or not. Y/N isn’t either. “Yes, well, there’s definitely no lack of activity here,” she says crisply, “I could use some personal space, though.”

“Is that why you came all the way out here?” Kaz asks plaintively, “or was it just me?”

Y/N looks away. “Both,” she decides at last, “I’d been wondering about exploring the world and I didn’t like living in a place where the person I loved couldn’t care less about me.”

He appreciates the truth, he always has. Still, it hurts, and more than Kaz thought mere words possibly could. “I always cared about you,” he whispers. 

Y/N glances carefully back at him. “Is that why your books have spent more time on your mind than me?”

Kaz can’t ignore the dig, especially not since it’s true. “I was wrong. I grew so used to having you around that I took you for granted. You were always there. It didn’t occur to me that you wouldn’t. I should have tried harder to make you stay.”

The words are hard to force out at first, but they get easier as time goes on. Y/N seems to accept this. “And you’ve changed in a few days? Seen the error in your ways and had a complete personality switch?”

“Well,” Kaz manages to croak, “I think that’s impossible. Even Inej’s Saints couldn’t do that.”

“Inej,” Y/N smiles, “what did you have to do to convince her to tell you where I was?”

“I told her the truth,” Kaz admits, “which is that I needed you more than anything. More than money. More than the jobs.”

Y/N’s eyes are wide. “And she believed you enough to tell you my address?”

Kaz inclines his head. “You have a job here. One you enjoy, if your activity level is any indication. I know how important that is. I won’t ask you to leave that for the Barrel if this is truly what you want.”

He hesitates, and Y/N picks up on it in a flash. “And the catch?”

Kaz levels his gaze at her. “I would, however, ask you to leave for me. If I promise you my time, would you come back?”

Y/N is silent for far too long for Kaz’s liking. At last, the faintest trace of a smile appears on her lips. “I already signed the job contract for my position at the hospital.”

Kaz feels his heart shatter on the ground. “Does that mean you can’t come back?”

Y/N shakes her head. “It means I’m glad I only signed on as a temporary measure while they look for a new candidate. I’ll tell them to hire the next in line.”

Kaz must have quite the expression, because Y/N breaks out into laughter. “Oh, don’t worry too much,” she says, “I don’t think I could ever leave Ketterdam. Not easily, at least. I knew that the second I boarded the train. Leaving has its merits, but I’ll always want to return more than I want to go.”

Kaz nods again, then steels himself and holds out his hand. “Shall we go, then?”

Y/N stares at his hand, then smiles and takes it. For once, the expected wave of revulsion upon physical contact doesn’t happen. All Kaz feels is calm, like a ship that’s been finally tied to an anchor.

“Yes,” she replies, “let’s go home.”

requested by @zaypay, i hope you enjoy!

grishaverse tag list: @rogueanschel, @deadreaderssociety, @cameronsails, @mxltifxnd0m, @story-scribbler, @retvenkos, @thatfangirl42, @amortensie, @gods-fools-heroes, @bl606dy, @auggie2000

[theprinceoffluff]

oh yes yes yes, more information about your OCs would be perfect!!

I'm trying to think of where to start lol.

Cain:

as i state in his ref sheet, he's kind of sarcastic and it often leads to him butting heads with Sun/Moon, but he does tend to get along with moon more. even though he is technically a serial killer(LMAO) unlike William afton, he tends to target parents/adults more often while being pretty gentle around kids. he also tends to treat people he finds interesting in a kind of demeaning or often times twisted 'playful' way where he likes to test limits and see how far he can take things enjoying scaring people. He definitely was the cause of several daycare staff quitting lmao.

he also tends to carry a basic knife which was handed down to him by his father, though for the most part he leaves it in the security desk when he's inside the daycare as to not accidentally get a child hurt, not that he hasn't used it as a threat before towards another employee. they literally cant fire him though, at this point he's there til he decides its not fun anymore. He doesn't have the best relationship with his father, his mother disappeared when he was a kid so he never really got to know her well. He gained an interest in robotics at an early age so he tends to mess around with the bots at the pizzaplex on his free time, it was a giving though since he spent most of his childhood visiting freddy's in general so when the pizzaplex opened he was already very interested in robotics and how the new animatronics operated. there's also a more dark side to that what with him finding old notes about remnants etc from his great grand papi William.

he literally has a secret stash of monty mix because its his favorite thing to drink at the pizzaplex so on his lunch breaks during the glitch he would often have to run like his life was on the line as chica chased him down. y aknow, just pizzaplex Shinanigans most of the time.

Honestly he's not as developed as Starbrite, but I find him fun in the context of my own headcannons/storyline I guess.

Starbrite:

A lot of his features were explained in the reference, but he also does have the ability to hook up to the wire system like sun and moon. he tends to go up gracefully with his arms outstretched like he's tightrope walking and do little tricks or shows for the kids when he's up to it or sees the mood has shifted a bit just to let sunny breathe for a moment when the kids get too much or when he's having trouble cleaning up.

he is a little bit sassy when he's on his last nerve, and for the most part, Cain gets on it a lot lmao. but he's very easy to appease by giving him objects like friendship bracelets, drawings, and even snacks!

He can eat/drink, and for the most part, his internal system runs on high sugar concentrated foods/drinks that are then converted into energy/power for him to run instead of needing to charge in a charging station during hours when sun/moon operate. he does however need to charge his backup power bank in a charging station, and that power bank typically is only active when he hasn't consumed enough sugar or is unable to have access to sugar for a few hours. typically at the end of the day all the extra solids from food after extraction of the sugar tend to come out of storage within his stomach area which opens up, they're compressed into small cubes and emptied once a day into a nearby trashcan.

Starbrite tends to get along with sun/moon/eclipse in general, and is programmed to love them unconditionally. a lot of this is due to my headcannon that after the glitch sun/moon developed a phobia of being unlovable and got anxious when thinking of that as well, so they needed someone who would be able to give them that reassurance when they needed it.

his cooling/heating system mainly serves to regulate sun/moons temperature when they do get out of control or get into a depressive state. Sun tends to run hot, almost burning up so starbrite cools him down, while Moon tends to literally go below freezing so starbrite warms him down. it makes for a soothing effect for both of them.

i also tend to headcannon that sun/moon/eclipse all have a coating of silicone on their bodies and are water proof to make it easier to deal with kids in general and make crafting a lot easier to do as well since they would be able to finger paint along with the kids etc so the same goes for starbrite.

His Tail acts as a star shaped nightlight however he has the ability to move his tail like a monkey would if he so chooses, hanging on the playset or monkey bars from it, or sitting mid-air while using it as a kind of balancing chair. makes for a fun trick.

i always will love the theory that sun/moon have bells on their wrists so that blind children can follow the sound. that they have 5 fingers in order to use sign language for deaf/mute children as well. So those are also things starbrite has/ is capable of doing.

he's 4'9" mainly because of my height ( he is low-key a self-insert on a minuscule level), but also I love the idea that originally when prototyping sun/moon Fazbear Entertainment made a much smaller test model which was then put into storage until they needed it for a much newer project.

uhhhh, i think that's it for now LOL That's all I could think of off the top of my head!

Sorry if this is a long read as well I tried to include as much as i could think about so that you'd have more info to go off of.

[petracozbi]

Dude, I’m living for this idea! Maybe chef would be using the trolls as a sort of mind-control weapon, like how Chaz hypnotized Poppy and Branch in twt with his smooth jazz.

I agree that Branch probably would have some issues; him going from basically living in isolation for 20 years, to suddenly being a part of a big family. Forming any kind of intimate bond so quickly, would probably pose a challenge; falling into a sudden family-dynamic with the other bros (who left him) definitely not being an exception, especially when, like you said, they’re basically strangers to him.

I imagine all the other bros having inside jokes and pleasant memories from their childhoods to reminisce on, while Branch is unable to understand or relate to any of it. Plus, he hadn’t really been living, just surviving, so there isn’t much to share with his brothers, unless he wants to make them extremely concerned for his well-being.

I think he learns this the hard way, probably when JD is sharing some survival stories from his time hiking Neverglade Trail, and Clay is geeking out about his knowledge on fire exits and boobytraps that he help build in the abandoned Bergen golf course; he tries to add on with his own stories, but instead he unknowingly just end up sharing super messed up and traumatic events from his life, like maybe him almost dying fighting off a giant critter, that was going to attack the troll village, or him sometimes going days without food when he was snowed in his bunker during winter (before he knew to make winter preparations), and the icing on the cake: him being gray for 20 years.

He tries to pass it off as funny memories (this boy does not have a shred of knowledge on social skills -or cues in his body), but the bros just stare at him, maybe they even scold him a little, saying stuff like that isn’t funny to joke about. It’s only when Poppy and some of the other trolls back up Branch’s stories that they start to believe it, but that just raises a whole lot of other questions.

Why was a kid allowed to live isolated, on his own in the forest?? Why weren’t anyone taking care of him?? I think they’d start to get angry with King Peppy, maybe even Poppy and the Snackpack, for letting Branch go through all that on his own, and then even ridicule him for being wary of the bergens. That is, before Branch intercepts, pointing out that they have no right to be angry, when they themselves left him. Maybe Branch won’t speak up when he himself is feeling uncomfortable, but he sure as hell won’t be having anyone, not even his brothers, yelling at his girlfriend and friends.

—

I really like your idea of Branch bottling up his feelings, and storming off after being confronted by his bros, and that would more likely be what could happen in the 4th movie, but this could be an alternative take on a fight Branch and the bros had before Branch stormed off and got captured by Chef.

Though I think mine is more fanfic-worthy than movie material

—

But one of the bros sacrificing themselves to save Branch akin to how Grandma Rosiepuff pushed Branch out of the way when he was about to be snatched up by Chef, is something I will genuinely be upset about, if they don’t put it into the next movie.

I also think it should be JD who does it, he was probably the one who was most at fault for splitting up the band, being obsessed with perfection, and he was also the first one to leave. But he was, and somewhat still is the leader in a way, so I could see him immediately taking charge when he learns Branch has been captured, and the others ready to follow his lead, like it’s the most natural thing in the world. And this time, John Dory knows to not be as bossy and critical.

It would be the perfect way to mend the bros relationships, not only with Branch, but with each other!

I’m so normal abt this headcanon

some little story ideas I thought up about Chef coming back in the next movie inspired by this other persons post.

so yeah I liked this other person's idea for a 4th film a lot so I thought up some extra details for a possible story where Branch is taken by Chef who gets revealed to still be alive.

I do really like this idea as the older Brothers coming together to save him from his greatest fear would be a satisfying story arc.

as the movie could maybe open with Poppy Peppy and Viva as well as all of Bro zone all just playing happy families getting along with each other and adjusting to the whole thing pretty easily.

meanwhile Branch Despite putting on a fake smile and hiding how he feels is still just feeling uneasy about the whole thing he could kinda be on a constant nervous edge where he's so afraid of doing or saying the wrong thing and causing tension that may cause them to fight and thus leave him again.

that he's pretty much a nervous wreck around his Brothers desperately trying to make sure everything is perfect all the time and never asking them for help or letting them know about any negative feelings he has from time to time Regarding them and also Grandma.

and he overall just doesn't feel like he has a family he can rely on anymore than he did During all those years that he had no family for.

in short he just still doesn't exactly trust them nor feel comfortable around them as their still somewhat strangers to him who he mostly knows from the past as being unreliable and quick to flee when the going gets tough.

which maybe causes some sorta argument where during an event JD gets frustrated with how he and the others can clearly tell he's been hiding something from them due to how weird and off he acts.

and he's tired of waiting for him to open up on his own and like I said this causes a big argument between Branch and JD Floyd and Clay try to calm things down but to no Avail.

Bruce steps in and agrees with JD tho he's less aggressive about it and more just calm and concerned.

but ultimately stuff is said on both ends ending with Branch finally letting out his true feelings and screaming at them about how they didn't care enough to stick around they didn't care enough to come back and they didn't care even when he was upset over them wanting to leave him again.

so why should he believe that they care now? and Branch runs away into the Forrest which could be when he's captured by Chef.

I'd think her motive is wanting revenge not just on all of Pop Village but also on Bergen Town given they Banished her twice but she somehow needs the magic that a Troll produces to achieve her plan hence why she takes Branch when he wonders off on his own.

maybe she does something similar to Velvet and Veneer where she drains the Troll magic out of him but this time she's using it to power a device that she's going to use to topple all of Bergen town and its people.

and then Pop Village just out of spite.

and it'd be just be nice as a emotional plot to have Bro zone rescuing Branch from their Grandma's killer maybe we even get some parallels where during the climax Chef in a last ditch effort out of spite goes to try and kill Branch only for one of the older Bros either JD or Bruce.

to push him out of the way sacrificing themselves in a scene mirroring when their Grandma was taken when Branch was a kid tho I'd have it just be a fake out death and they get saved soon afterwards.

but point is the sentiment is the same where they were willing to sacrifice themselves for him.

and early on in the film it'd be good to finally have Branch acknowledge that he is aware it was Chef from that fateful day and he angrily comments on it only for her to callously not Remember who or what he's talking about stating that she killed so many Trolls that his Grandma wasn't at all special and she doesn't even remember the day he's talking about.

obviously Hurting and angering Branch given that day pretty much shaped who he became afterwards for his whole life.

and maybe in another scene Branch states to Chef that knows that Poppy will come to save him but when he thinks about his brothers he just thinks back to how easily they've all broken up in the past at the first sign of trouble and he sadly thinks to himself that they likely wouldn't bother coming to save him.

and this leads to Bro zone actually stepping up and Risking their lives to save him from the source of his greatest Trauma aka their Grandmother's killer thus by the end actually showing Branch that he really can trust his family to be there for him this time.

and just Chef getting to face off with Bro zone would be neat since ya know she killed their Grandma and Honestly I've always found it weird from a writing perspective how her being the one who killed Branch's Grandmother was never actually acknowledged at any point in the first movie the only reason we the audience know is a super brief glimpse we see of her During Branch's flashback scene.

so even getting to see Branch himself have a proper face off with Chef over his Grandma would be nice since they never actually Directly interacted in the first film except for the scene where she tried to force feed him to Gristle Jr poor guy.

so yeah what do you think about the idea? the person behind the post did also say that the idea could still maybe work without the whole Chef being Revealed to be alive angle and it instead just being a new villain who kidnaps Branch.

but I feel the first idea where she is the main villain again would add a nice sense of personal stakes to the story for the main characters involved given it wraps up a nice little part of the Bro zone family's History.

sure we saw her get eaten at the end of the first film but that can easily be Retconned where she somehow survived and was able to escape from the creatures mouth.

plus it'd be satisfying to see The Brothers all work together to defeat her in the final battle and this time her Defeat could be Ironic for a whole different reason where due to some magic nonsense in the end Chef gets shrunken down to the point she's now smaller than the Trolls by a lot.

she's made so small that she's as Helpless as her past Troll victims were.

and she isn't actually capable of hurting them anymore we see her angrily charge at Branch and start swinging away and he's scared at first only for him to then awkwardly Realise she isn't actually Hurting him.

Despite her best efforts and he just kinda flicks her away

not to mention it'd be fun seeing Branch and his Bros just playfully toss her back and fourth like some sorta ball kids play with.

really showing how none of them are afraid of her anymore not even Branch which would be very satisfying imo.

and after some mocking by Bro zone towards Chef they pick her up and toss her in a tiny cage where she's most likely kept in prison either at Bergen town or at one of the other Trolls Tribes since they most likely wouldn't want to keep her at Pop Village.

anyway I just love this persons idea I think Chef coming back would work great as an emotional plot device to Develop Bro zone's Relationship with Branch Further.

and it could expand on all of the Bros's Relationship with their Grandma a little further as well which would be nice.

what do you think?

[palimpsessed]

Hey. You post a lot of great stuff about Carry On. Can you talk about the biting in AWTWB. The Baz/Simon scenes.Trying to wrap my head around it to understand why Simon did that. Why he bites Baz and keeps biting. Bites his fangs through his cheek. Is it because Simon wants to be bitten? That he wants Baz so much and Baz can't be harmed? I'm really trying to understand it but . . . what do you think?

Anon, thank you for this ask, and also for liking whatever I'm doing on my blog.

Can I talk about the biting? You bet I can!

Why does Simon bite Baz? Is it because he wants to be bitten? In a word, yes! But of course, there's a lot more to it than that. And this went off in another direction than I thought it would, so I hope you can stick with me on this journey! Under the cut because it’s a bit long.

There is a motif running throughout the trilogy of love being a consuming force. So much of Simon and Baz's identities are tied up in hunger very early on: Baz, as a vampire, constantly craving blood; Simon, as the Humdrum, constantly sucking up magic; both of them starved of love and intimacy. There's also a lot of fire imagery, going all the way back to when they first met, and fire is another consuming force.

Simon and Baz are obsessed with each other. The only thing they think about is each other. ("Trying not to think about you…S'like trying not to think about an elephant that's standing on my chest.") They are consumed and they want to consume, and, at least in Simon's case, they want to be consumed.

In WS, Simon reflects on misunderstanding his feelings for Baz prior to eighth year, and the way he does it has always stuck out to me: "I thought about him all the time. I missed him so much in the summer. (I thought I was just lonely. I thought I was hungry. I thought I was bored.)" The second item on that list is what catches my attention. Simon missed Baz and he thought he was hungry. I think it says a lot about how Simon's love for Baz feels if he mistakes it for actual hunger.

In the biting scene you mentioned, Simon says to Baz: "If it were me, if I were you…I'd drain you fuckin' dry, Baz, and it still wouldn't be enough." That's intense. And it's absolutely Simon. We know how much hunger he's capable of; his hunger was so potent, it became a whole other being! I've long maintained that his hunger for magic is a metaphor for his hunger for love. Because Simon is so full of love, and just utterly bereft of people to give it to, and once he has people to love, he doesn't know how to do it without also hurting them. He's never had good relationship modeling. (He thinks Baz should know he loves him because of how many things he's killed for him.—He thinks about teaching Baz how to break someone's neck like it's a fun couples' activity.—He gets turned on by killing things and watching Baz kill, too.—Date night is helping Baz hunt down rats.) Simon is a mess. He wants to love so badly, but he just doesn't know how to do it. ("Is this what people do?")

Simon loves Baz so much, he can't fathom ever getting enough of him. Ever being able to consume enough of him. He can't stop biting and smelling and grabbing because he wants more, more, more. He fits his teeth over Baz's old scars because he needs to claim him—make his own mark on Baz, possess him.

Part of this, as you said, is the fact that Baz is a vampire. Baz can take the roughness (which is not to say that he should just because he can). Simon's fixation on Baz's vampirism, which used to play out as paranoia, has changed into a desire to be bitten. Simon is thinking about Baz's vampirism, thinking about draining Baz dry if he were the vampire, and Baz, the human.

The other part of this is that Simon is unfettered, but really only in the aggressive, physical sense. He's long hidden his desires behind aggression without realizing that's what he was doing. (In CO: "I just want to run him down and knock him over and figure it all out." In AWTWB: "I wanted to jump on you, I didn't really think past that.") He doesn't know how to be unfettered in the vulnerable, emotional sense, and that's what keeps him from being able to be intimate with Baz. ("I don't know how, Baz…To get enough.")

Simon desperately wants to have sex with Baz. Which is what he's trying to do in the biting scene, but all of his desires are warring for control, and he can't sort out what he wants, and what he should be doing in that moment, with Baz.

What this is all leading me to may be a bit off topic, but I think it's all tied up in Simon's head.

Simon doesn't know how to be gentle.

His hunger and his desire for Baz have never been gentle. It's aggression, it's violence, it's possession; it's a forest fire, it's not a hidden waterfall.

Simon has never learned how to be at peace. In a recent interview with Vanity Fair, Rainbow said she made Simon "fight of flight"—literally, he has wings! There's a reason that Simon couldn't handle the inaction at the beginning of CO and before the events of WS. There's a reason that Penelope thought that they were "being lulled" because there was no war actively being waged. There's a reason Penelope tells us in WS: "Lesson learned: Relaxation is the most insidious humdrum." These are characters who are so traumatized by childhoods being foot soldiers in a war waged by the adults they trusted, they don't know how to live without fighting! They don't know how to live in peace.

We all have "I can touch you less gently, but I won't love you less kindly" burned into our eyeballs by now, but let's move earlier in that conversation to what sparks this: "What if I asked you to be less kind to me?" —What if I asked you to be less kind to me?— Simon doesn't feel comfortable with Baz's kindness or gentleness, because it "makes me feel like I'm being turned inside out. Like I need to get away." Let's sit with this for a bit. Baz's loving touches make Simon want to run because they're kind and gentle and he doesn't know what to do with kind and gentle. His mind isn't programmed for kind and gentle.

It makes complete sense that Simon would show Baz affection in a way that Simon understands, considering, as I said before, that he hasn't had anyone in his life to show him a healthy way to do this. What does Simon most want from Baz? Love. What does Simon understand love to be? Consumption. He wants roughness and aggression, he wants the inferno, because these are things he understands.

Simon wants Baz's teeth, so he gives Baz his teeth.

This is how Simon feels comfortable. I made this post while processing my feelings about AWTWB. It talks about Simon trying to love Baz the way he wants to be loved, and Baz trying to love Simon the way he wants to be loved. They want to give each other everything, but they haven't actually communicated their needs to one another, and that's what keeps them from being able to work through their problems. It isn't until they voice their needs that they're able to be intimate. This is what I'm really trying to get at here.

"Is this what people do?" Simon asks, over and over again. When Simon was in therapy, he learned a technique to break up "life into bites you can swallow". He tells us he's doing this again in AWTWB "because [the future] is too terrifying. Too uncertain. There are parts of it that are too bright." —There are parts of it that are too bright.— Simon doesn't know how to be happy. He doesn't know how to cope with happiness. "Is this what people do when they're in love? Do they just keep touching and talking? And then what? Like what is it all leading to? I don't mean sex, I mean… If I knew what I meant, it wouldn't be so frightening." When Simon is having all these overwhelming feelings about his future with Baz, they're on the Tube, and Simon sees a guy giving him and Baz "a dirty look". He interrupts his introspective on therapy to tell us that he wants the guy to cause trouble "because I would dearly love to punch something right now. That's a decision I could wrap my brain around." He can wrap his brain around punching someone, but not around a bright future with the man he loves.

Simon doesn't know how to be at peace. He doesn't know how to be in love. He doesn't know how to be happy. I think this is what we're seeing at play when he bites Baz. He wants something so badly, but he doesn't know what it is, can't articulate it, can't get at it. In a way, when he bites Baz, Simon is trying to ask for what he wants, without words, and without really knowing what it is that he does want.

He can't figure out how to let himself be happy and feel good while being happy. He can't stand gentleness, or softness. In his head, he can't give that to Baz, because he can't handle it himself.

So, yes, Simon bites Baz because he wants to be bitten. And he bites Baz because he knows Baz can handle it. And he bites Baz because there's an emptiness inside of him that he's still trying to fill, and he doesn't understand how to do that. Someday, he will fill it. He and Baz are going to figure that out together.

I hope this makes sense. With your indulgence, Anon, I'm going to tag in @theflyingpeach who is all around brilliant, and I know has their own thoughts about this scene (and demon Simon 👀👀👀) that I would like to see more of. 🥰

A follow up to this ask can be found here.

Further reading on the relationship between consumption, food, and love compiled here.

[criticallyacclaimedstranger]

Fic: The Instructor chapter 8, Lesson Two

Chapter 1: Lesson One | Chapter 2: A Rash Decision | Chapter 3: Good Intentions | Chapter 4: Chicken Soup | Chapter 5: Knotted Strings | Chapter 6: Crossed Blades | Chapter 7: Christmas Party | Chapter 8: Lesson Two | Chapter 9: Shopping Spree

Read on Ao3

Rating: Explicit

Fandom: We Can Be Heroes

Relationship: Marcus Moreno/Original Female Character (Kate)

Chapter summary: After the Christmas party incident, Kate is finally introduced to the kind of sex Marcus likes, with satisfying results.

Chapter tags: Talking and setting ground rules, kissing, basic spanking, praising, cunnilingus, rough PiV sex, safe sex, multiple orgasms, Marcus continues to be a soft dom, aftercare. Tell me if I missed anything!

A/N: Sorry this took forever. Enjoy!

They snuck sneaked out from the party after their hot session in the restroom. Kate’s lipstick was smeared, and a lot of it was on Marcus. Her panties were a mess.

Marcus, having had only one drink, drove her home. She could tell that he wanted her to ask him to come up, but she didn’t. She had to be by herself after this experience. He did, however, not let her go until he knew she was okay.

“We didn’t ruin anything now, did we?” he asked her as they sat in his car, parked by the sidewalk outside her apartment building. Kate smiled and shook her head.

“No,” she reassured him. “I... would like to see you again some night, Marcus.”

“We’ll figure something out.”

A few weeks later, when Kate parks her bike in the garage of her apartment building, she receives a text from Marcus: Can I see you this Saturday? Her heart starts to beat faster at once.

Yes.

Your place, at 8?

8 is perfect.

There it is again, that titillation growing deep in her belly from where it flutters up to her ribcage, where it makes her heart beat like it’s trying to escape. What’s going to happen?

Marcus steps into her apartment with the certainty of someone who has stalked their prey for a long while and has finally cornered it.

“You look so beautiful,” he murmurs as he eyes her with appreciation. Kate has made an effort: put on some makeup, a nice yet casual dress, and she’s prepared a light meal.

“You look nice, too,” she tells him. He’s poignantly casual yet handsome in jeans and a slightly better shirt. His facial hair has been trimmed to perfection and his hair looks like he has spent two hours at a salon where a hair artist very carefully disheveled it just right.

“Can I kiss you?” he asks and Kate doesn’t even bother to answer him with words but leans forward to press her lips to his. The kiss is brief but packed with promise and anticipation.

“That’s a very warm welcome,” he winks and to her chagrin, Kate blushes a little.

“I’m very curious about what’s going to happen tonight,” she admits.

“I think we’d better have a talk before we get to anything physical,” Marcus replies, gesturing to show Kate that he wants to go sit down.

“Now you sound like me,” she says lightly and leads the way into the kitchen. “Come, I made something to eat.”

She offers him wine and he accepts one glass, but no more.

“Alcohol must have no part of the things I like to do in bed,” he explains. “Control is everything and for you, being able to breathe properly is even more important.”

A shiver runs up Kate’s spine as she pours some wine for herself before indicating to Marcus that he can help himself to the Mediterrenean lentil salad.

“This looks good,” he says with appreciation as he spoons the dish up on his plate. “You always cook your own meals?”

“I try but sometimes I do takeout,” Kate shrugs and accepts the serving spoon from him. “Do you cook?”

“Have to, because of Missy, don’t I?” he smiles. “But I do all right. She doesn’t complain… much.”

He tastes the food and nods his appreciation.

“This is really good.”

“Thanks.”

“You have to give me the recipe.”

There’s something about the situation that makes Kate jittery.

“Is that what we’re doing here?” she asks him plainly. “Switching recipes?”

Marcus looks at her, eyes growing dark. He puts down his fork.

“No. That’s not what I had in mind at all.”

Kate puts down her fork as well, dinner forgotten. She’s not even hungry.

He measures her for a moment before nodding. “Okay. Ground rules and hard limits. I’m not into humiliation, knife or gun play. I won’t break your skin or make you feel like shit. I won’t string you up or restrict your movements too much. I won’t choke you until you lose consciousness. I don’t enjoy slapping women in the face.”

Kate’s heart starts to beat faster. She did a Google search of BDSM practices last night but was overwhelmed with everything, not knowing where she should start, and realizing she had no idea what she would enjoy, if anything. To have Marcus tick off turn-offs like they were foods he didn’t like, right after asking her for a recipe, almost makes her laugh if she wasn’t so intrigued – and nervous.

She realizes that he’s waiting for her to speak.

“Um… I don’t know what I like,” she confesses. “I like what we did at the Christmas party. When you took control and made me beg.”

“I could tell,” he says in a low voice accompanied by a predatory smirk that makes the hairs on Kate’s arms rise. “Have you ever been spanked, Kate?”

She shakes her head.

“Would you like me to spank you?”

“Not like… across your lap,” she tells him faintly. The idea is somehow off-putting. Marcus nods.

“There are many ways to go about it.”

“I’m sure.” Her arousal starts to seep into her panties, making her bold. “You wanna take this to the bedroom?”

Marcus glances down at the meal laid out on the table between them but Kate shakes her head. “I don’t care.”

Their chairs scrape against the floor simultaneously as they both get up and crash together in a hungry kiss that doesn’t stop until they’ve made their way to the bedroom. There, Marcus tears himself from Kate and takes a firm but gentle hold of her jawline.

“The first thing you need to learn are the three colors,” he tells her, now practical yet somehow still enthralling. “If you’re okay, you say green. If you need me to slow down, you say yellow. And if you want to stop, you say red. You got that? I won’t stop if you tell me to stop, I won’t listen to a no. Tell me red, and I’ll stop right away. Do you understand?”

She nods, eyes widening at how easily he takes the reins. Marcus shakes his head and pinches her ass through the dress, making her flinch.

“Use your words.”

“Yes, Marcus, I understand,” she breathes, a whole new brand of excitement flaring through her. This is unfamiliar terroritory and she finds herself aching to explore it.

Marcus’s stare, narrow and intense, bores into her eyes. His grip of her jaw is by no means hard but it is filled with authority and renders her immobile in wait for his next command.

“Good,” he nods, his hold slackening, fingers tracing along her jawline to her neck where they close softly, his thumb on her windpipe. “I can feel your pulse, baby. Your heart is beating so fast. Are you wet yet?”

The direct question takes her by surprise and when her answer is delayed, Marcus brings his other hand down on her ass in a sharp slap that makes her gasp.

“I asked you a question!”

“Yes,” Kate hurries to please him. “Yes, I’m wet.”

“How are we for color?” Marcus tilts his head slightly.

“Green,” she confirms. “Marcus, I…”

She falls quiet, bites her lower lip. Marcus caresses her cheek, draws his thumb over her lips, separating them before they slip back, her nude rose lipstick smeared.

“Yes?”

“May I speak?” Kate’s not sure this is how this works but the pleased hum she gets from Marcus lets her know she’s doing it just right.

“Such a quick learner. Yes, you may speak.”

“I like it when you talk dirty like that,” she confesses, cheeks flushing but voice firm.

“Duly noted. Now, turn around and bend over for me.”

The bed is behind her, and with slightly trembling legs, Kate does as Marcus says. Bending over, she puts her hands down on the soft duvet cover and waits without knowing what exactly will happen. Is he just going to start spanking her? Wouldn’t he give her a warning first? She has no idea but for the first time in years it doesn’t freak her out to not have control of the situation.

“You take orders so beautifully,” Marcus praises her in a voice which drips of a honeyed, fine Scotch. His hand brushes over her hip and Kate twitches in surprise before leaning into his touch. His palm is warm and surprisingly soft. She has seen his calluses, knows what kind of roughness handling swords for years brings the hands.

“Relax, baby.” His hand runs down her thigh to the edge of her dress, then up again on the inside of the fabric, pulling it up. The next second the skirt is hitched up to her waist and his hand lands on the side of her ass in a sharp slap that pulls a startled shriek from her.

“Talk to me,” Marcus tells her in that amber voice that is so soft and sweet yet potent and commanding. Kate draws a deep breath and realizes that the slap wasn’t bad at all.

“Green,” she acknowledges, her voice trembling only slightly.

“Good.” He caresses the curve of her ass, fingers sliding underneath the thin fabric of the panties to pinch the flesh.

“Spread your legs more.”

She obeys, feeling the wet in her panties turn cold as her thighs separate and the air hits her crotch. A shiver runs through her and she wets her lips.

“You’re shaking, beautiful. Are you nervous?” She can hear the smile in Marcus’s voice.

“No,” she shakes her head. “I’m… excited.”

“Horny and wet,” he corrects her and Kate draws a deep breath.

“I’m horny and wet. Marcus, please – “

“In due time. You have to be patient, baby. Like me.”

He crowds her against the bed, pushing himself against her. The rough denim is bulging stiffly in the front.

“Feel that? That’s what you do to me, Kate. Just you wait.”

Kate moans, pushing back against him, wanting to feel every inch of the hardness, rub her pussy on it, find some relief for her throbbing clit. But Marcus draws back.

“I told you to wait. You have to show me that you can handle it first.”

“Anything, Marcus,” she whimpers. “Please.”

Slowly, he hooks his thumbs over the waistband of her panties, and pull them down. When her ass is bare, he caresses the skin with one hand as he speaks.

“I will use an open palm, and alternate. You are not to make a sound, do you understand?”

“Yes.”

“Remember your colors, baby.” With that, he brings his hand down on her cheek and Kate presses her lips together as she starts to slow down her breathing to a conscious flow in and out through her nose. It’s a habit procured by three decades of learning how to control how the air flows into her. The bite of each slap subsides into an aching heat and she finds herself wishing Marcus would use a little more force.

After six strikes, he pauses with his hand on her glowing ass.

“Color?”

“Green.”

“You’re not letting go, baby. Just let go. Surrender.”

“I – “

“I said you need to let go.” He spanks her again, taking her by surprise. Kate almost chokes on her inhale as her glowing ass takes the sting of it.

“There you are,” Marcus murmurs with satisfaction, passing both his hands over her ass cheeks, digging his fingers into her tender flesh. “Take it, baby. Let me hear you.”

He spanks her again and she feels the adrenaline rush through her as she slowly lets go of the control and moans loud for each strike. The pain is tolerable but unlike any other she has ever experienced, and the whole situation so strange and titillating and exciting. She’s dripping wet, skin crawling with need, ass inflamed when Marcus brings down his big hand on her left cheek one last time.

“Just like that,” he murmurs, and Kate now hears the barely held back excitement in his voice as well. “You did so good.”

He shoves his crotch against her again, rubs the denim on her heated skin, making her moan again.

“Feel this? This is what you do to me, baby. I’m so hard for you. I’m going to fuck you very soon, I promise.”

His crotch is replaced by his lips as he bends down behind her.

“But first, I’ll reward you. You were so good, Kate, you deserve to cum. Do you want to cum?”

“Yes, Marcus!” she cries, legs trembling when she feels his breath on her, even hotter than the burn on her skin.

“Sweet girl.”

His tongue is in her the next moment and Kate hides her face in the bedspread, almost sobbing as her nerve endings crackle and spark. He licks long, stiff strokes from her pussy to her clit, ending in a generous swirl that makes her breath stutter as she launches into a pathetic, desperate plead of please, please, please. Marcus grabs her ass and makes her mewl by pressing his fingertips into the tender flesh, and his tongue starts to focus on her clit. The pleasure paired with pain throws Kate over the edge faster than she ever expected, her legs always buckling under her as she moans her release against the bedspread. She’s obscenely wet and as Marcus withdraws, he replaces his tongue with two fingers, slowly rubbing her slick opening, slipping them in before teasing her clit.

“Marcus…!” she keens, drawing her thighs together. He slaps her ass and pulls her legs back apart.

“Colors, Kate. Use them.”

She draws a deep breath and leans into the intensity.

“Green,” she decides, and Marcus pulls her up with a rough yank that sends her crashing into his broad frame. He grabs her by her neck and angles her head so that he can kiss her. She tasted her own earthy flavor on him and almost chokes on the rough kiss before Marcus pulls back. His brown eyes are hypnotic when he fixes his gaze on hers.

“Can I fuck you now?” he breathes. Kate’s pussy clenches and a chill runs through her. She wets her lips and nods.

“Words, baby.”

“Please, fuck me, Marcus,” she whispers, hands slowly coming to cover his. “I need you to fuck me.”

He releases a little moan before slotting his mouth over hers again. As he kisses her with a hunger that she has never experienced before, he gathers the fabric of her dress in his hands, and pulls the garment over her head. When their lips connect again, he flicks her bra open and shoves the straps down her shoulders, freeing her tits to be covered by his palms. He pinches her almost painfully stiff nipples, pulls them out, cups her tits, only to stop abruptly as he shoves her down on the bed.

“Lie down,” he tells her hoarsely, and Kate turns onto her back, legs apart to taunt him with her glistening pussy as he gets undressed and puts on a condom he pulled from his pocket.

“Do you have a good vibrator?” he asks, and it takes Kate a few moments to understand what he’s asking. She has an embarrassing feeling that he wouldn’t consider her cheap bullet vibrator good. She mostly just uses her hand.

“Uh… it’s okay? It’s not charged, though.”

Marcus makes a little displeased sound as he joins her on the bed and nudges her to lie on her side.

“That’s worse for you,” he tells her as he lifts her top leg and places the calf on his shoulder. Nocking the thick head of his cock at her slick opening, he slides his thumb through her lips and up to her clit, pressing down as he starts to inch in. Kate whimpers at the intrusion and stimulation, then cries out when he drives his entire length inside her with a rough thrust.

“There,” he groans, pressing down her clit. “Take it, baby, feel all of me. I got you now.”

He pulls out almost entirely before thrusting deeply again, pulling another loud moan from her. Grabbing her hand and directing it between her legs, he presses her fingers to her clit.

“Had you had a charged vibrator, this could’ve been simpler,” he explains with an impatient grimace, “but now you have to do all the work yourself. I’m going to fuck your tight, wet pussy now, Kate, and I want you to rub your clit until you cum on my cock. Can you do that for me?”

“Yes, Marcus,” is all Kate can say, because there really is nothing more to say or do or want at this point. She needs him so bad it almost hurts physically.

Marcus does not disappoint. He fucks her hard, holding onto her leg with one hand and using the other to fondle her tits. Whenever he tells her, with clenched teeth, how good she feels, her pussy clenches around him, pulling a moan from him and bringing her even closer to the edge. Her fingers are working her clit with a frantic desperation that finally pulls her apart and makes her throw her head back with a long moan.

“That’s it, just like that, you feel so good when you cum,” Marcus growls before pumping into her with a few jerky movements, holding onto her leg and waist. She feels him pulsate inside her sensitive pussy, and squeezes him with all the might she has left. The breathless curse, delivered in a moan bordering on a whine, tells her that Marcus is just as raw as she is.

He pulls out and gets rid of the condom before returning to bed. His hands are soft and careful when he gathers her into his arms and kisses her with soft lips brushing gently over hers. He’s sweaty and hot but Kate is slowly realizing that her skin is just as shiny with perspiration as his.

“Talk to me, Kate. How are you feeling?”

“Thoroughly fucked,” she whispers with an exhausted smile. Marcus smile back and kisses her forehead.

“How the ass? Are you in any pain?”

“No… it’s warm, but I’m good.”

“I’m glad to hear that.” He gently caresses a lock of hair from her face before kissing her again. “You were amazing. You did so well.”

“Thank you,” she blushes, a little self-conscious now that her heartbeat is slowing down to normal. “You gave very good directions. And took care of me very well.”

“I’m glad.” Another soft, brief kiss grazes her lips before he relinquishes her to the sheets and gets up.

“I saw you have a tub. Can I run you a bath?”

“Only if you join me.”

Marcus grins. “Your wish is my command, beautiful.”

He pulls the covers over her to keep her warm and disappears into the bathroom. A few moments later, Kate hears water running. Her eyelids feel heavy, her body uncooperative yet exhilarated, as if after a weekend training camp.

“Here.”

She startles, unaware of having dozed off. Marcus is next to her, offering a glass of cold water. Slowly, Kate sits up and accepts it, taking a little sip. The fresh chill of the water makes her realize just has parched her mouth is, and she drains the whole glass.

“Good girl,” Marcus nods as she hands it back to her. He then checks himself, and gives her an apologetic smile. “Sorry.”

“That’s okay.”

“The bath is ready.”

Soon, she’s reclined against Marcus’s broad chest, his thighs spread to accommodate her, the hot water smelling of her favorite bath oils, Marcus gently massaging her shoulders.

“Shouldn’t I be doing that to you?” she asks rhetorically, with no intention of letting him stop anytime soon. “You’re the one who did all the work.”

“This is aftercare, and it’s all about the sub,” Marcus explains. “I want you to relax, feel safe, and talk about the experience.”

“That sounds so formal.”

“It’s very important that nothing is left unsaid and that you feel comfortable to tell me what you want, if you want to do it again.”

Kate shifts so quickly in his arms that the water splashes over the edge of the tub. “I want to do it again!”

Marcus’s smile is all boyish teasing. “I’m glad to hear that.”

Kate leans back against his chest, finding his hands and bringing them around herself.

“Will you stay the night?” she asks him in a low voice, not really sure what to expect.

“I’d like that, if you want me to.”

“I want you to.”

“Then I’ll stay,” he promises in a husky whisper against her neck.

[justoneacatperson]

First Date

This is reupload from my old blog!

request by @therealpotatobish

TodoDeku x Fem! Reader

Date with Todoroki and Midoriya is, to put it mildly - chaos. Where do I start?

First we have Todoroki. Very handsome young man with two-tone hair and eyes. We all know that Shoto is not familiar with many things, his childhood was not very colorful and rosy, not at all.

He has not seen his parents take care of each other or behave like a couple, so he is not very familiar with how to treat a person he likes.

He didn’t even realize he liked Midoriya when he was still a student at U.A. It was good that there were his sister to explain to him what those feelings were.

We have already seen that he takes things seriously and does not understand jokes or metaphors, so it takes time to work with him.

Certainly his relationship with Izuku helped him a lot. He showed him what love, care and empathy are, but for him things are complicated again. He and Izuku will date a woman, a woman they have been in love with since their school years in the U.A. Shoto doesn’t know how to treat a woman and what they would like.

We also have the next one, namely Midoriya. Our broccoli boy has remained the same shy young man, despite his fame as the new No.1 hero, this part of him has not changed.

He would certainly do better than Todoroki, but his still shy nature worries him that he won’t be able to talk to you.

They are both worried about your reaction to everything. They have never heard that you like someone, nor have there been rumors that you are with someone, they didn’t even know if you like boys !? Nevertheless, you accepted their invitation to a date, at least they managed to make it clear that they were inviting you to a date, a DATE, and you were fine with that.

Now was the date where they would know if they had a chance with you, and here they were, sitting at the reserved table, waiting for you to come.

21:27p.m

Deku kept a close eye on his watch, looking at every minute. They had arrived about ten minutes ago and were sitting nervously at the table, well, Izuku was moving nervously, and Shoto was sitting meekly, staring at one dot, trying to keep his mind tidy and clear.

-“She will come, Midoriya, our dateis at 9:30p.m.” Todoroki exclaimed, grabbing his boyfriend’s hand under the table to reassure him.

-“Ah, I know, Shoto-san, but that doesn’t make me any less nervous.” the green-haired man replied, smiling at his partner. -“We have been waiting for a long time for the chance to invite her and the fact that she agreed and now we will have a date makes me feel surreal. It’s as if I’ve finally reached a goal that I thought was impossible. It’s very strange that happens, I still consider it unrealistic.”

The two-colored man looked at him with surprised heterochromic eyes. Despite their years together, the things they went through could not be compared to that. And the fact that Deku feels that way surprises him. He is also surprised that he was able to describe how he felt too.

It felt like he was 17 again in his 2nd year at U.A. When he shared his feelings to Midoriya. Confused, scared, excited. He never believed that he would fall in love or be able to be a partner, the love of someone else.

A small smile crept across his face. Todoroki leaned over to his partner, leaning his head on his shoulder. Their physique has changed and evolved over the years. Already in his mid-twenties, Deku had grown much taller than his school years. He was now towering over Shoto.

Midoriya smiled, leaning against Shoto, planting a kiss on his white and red hair.  The two parted, looking up at a door that could be heard opening and closing. 20:30, you arrived just in time.

You looked around the restaurant in confusion, looking for your table. Midoriya instinctively raised his hand, waving at you and shouting. -“(Y/n)-chan!” you looked up at them, a wide smile appeared on your face, bringing butterflies into the stomachs of both heroes.

-“Hey, Deku, Sho!” you replied, going to them.

Midoriya wanted to make a good impression by taking your jacket and pulling your chair backward to sit, but you came like a whirlwind, sitting hastily in the seat in front of them. Obviously there will be no good first impression.

-“Oh, I was in such a hurry so as not to be late.” you started, removing your jacket, leaving it on the back of the chair. - “I was nervous not to be late because there was a traffic jam on the road. After I managed to park it took me time to find the restaurant and…”

Deku waved his arms in front of him, trying to reassure you that you weren’t late, sharing his own worries about not being late. So you two became a muttering mess, and Todoroki rested his chin on his hand, happily watching the scene in front of him. Cute.

-“You are not late, you have nothing to worry about.” the two-colored man called out of nowhere, stopping you and Izuku.

-“It’s good to know.” you said calmly, leaving your hands on the table. -“Long time no see.”

-“Since our graduation in the U.A.” added the green-haired man, rubbing the back of his head.

-“What’s happen with you? I last heard you joined Selkie’s agency.” you nodded in agreement to Shoto.

-“Yes, my quirk would be very welcome in sea battles.”

-“Are you adapting fast?” Deku asked cheerfully.

-“Yes, the hero Manual is there too. We have some pretty similar quirks, so he was so kind to help me adapt.” you replied, controlling the water in your glass with your quirk, making it take the shape of a snake and move along the walls of your glass in a circle.

-“This is very good.” exclaimed the hero, tying his hands on the table.

They both felt a little awkward, not knowing how to continue the conversation, fortunately the waitress saved them by giving them the menus. You opened the menu of hard leather covers, looking at the variety of foods.

-“Oh, hey, Sho, they have a cold soba.” you said excitedly, showing him the menu on the first page.

-“So I’ll order a cold soba.” the two-colored man replied before receiving muttering from Midoriya.

-“But, Sho, we have a whole pot full of soba!” you laughed at their interaction, attracting their attention.

-“What?” they both asked at the same time.

-“Nothing, you just haven’t changed since we graduated from the U.A.” you said with a laugh. Deku giggled too, smiling at you.

-“What do you mean? We look the same way we did 7 years ago?” Todoroki asked confusedly, looking at himself and his boyfriend and again to himself. You and Izuku looked at each other and almost fell from your seats with your boisterous laughter. -“Ah?”

-“O-oh…. Sho!” tears formed in the corners of your eyes, wiping them with your hand. -“You’re still funny!”

-“Funny?”

-“Yes.” the green-haired man replied, leaning his head on his partner’s shoulder.

The three of you ordered a teishoku, receiving it in about 30 minutes. Everyone enjoy their food before Todoroki calls.

-“(Y/n), do you see our old class?” you swallowed your food before answering.

-“Yes, even with some very often.” you said, playing with your chopsticks, twisting them between your fingers and doing tricks with them. -“Most often I go out with Kaminari, by some chance it turned out that we work in the same agency.”

-“Kaminari-san?” Deku exclaimed, looking at you in astonishment. You nodded, uttering a little “Uhm.”

-“All right, that’s nice! We haven’t heard from Denki.”

-“Are you close to each other?” Shoto asked, taking another bite of his meal.

-“I’d say yes. We go out often, we message to each other, he’s very cute. He’s also grown a lot from UA, he’s become more responsible and he controls his quirk much better. We have a lot of fun together. We have dinners for us, in which we are on the couch at my or his home and eating popcorn while watching scary movies. "you said with a smile on your face.

-"Oh, I understand…” Todoroki replied, bowing his head over his food, hiding his face through his hair, which he had left to grow for reaching a length where he could tie it in a bun.

Izuku reached under the table, gripping his boyfriend’s thigh, rubbing it lightly to offer support. He knew his boyfriend’s lack of confidence in relationships. He has always worried about whether he is doing well as a partner and doing everything right.

Talking about a boy (and you’re not the person who talks a lot or often about people, especially boys), who is the opposite of his personality and sees that you’re really having fun with him, feels like someone hit him with wet rag across the face.

-“And you guys…” you called, bringing them both back to reality. -“How are you? The press is very interested in your relationship.” you smiled slyly.

-“So… After we graduated from UA, Shoto and I went to Endeavor’s agency, as his partners in catching villains. That was until we turned 22, All Might offered to take his agency… And I took it.” he replied, scratching the back of his head where his undercut was. -“The press found out about my relationship with Todoroki when I took the agency and there were hundreds of news stories that said, ‘Hero No.1 is in a relationship with Endeavor’s son’.”

-”O!?”

-“Yes, and still receives dozens of emails a day, invitations for interviews about our relationship.”

-“It’s too much for you. The press hasn’t learned for so many years that the heroes have a private life that they usually keep to themselves and don’t want to make it public. The personal space of the heroes must be respected.” you said and turned to Todoroki. -“And for so many years as a pro-hero, people have kept leading you the 'son of Endeavor,’ and that’s all you’re known for.”

-“It’s annoying.” Todoroki replied, making you and Deku giggle a little.

-“Well, those are just words from older people in Japan.” the green-haired man exclaimed, rubbing his boyfriend’s thigh. -“I am sure that the young generation will remember you with your name and your deeds.”

-“You’re right.” said his partner.

-“Ah, (Y/n)-san, do you happen to be in a relationship or dating someone?” Midoriya asked you. Shoto immediately ran one hand under the table, squeezing his thigh - too early, Midoriya.

-“O!?” you opened your eyes wide to them from the sudden question. -“No, I’m not in a relationship, I’m not dating anyone. Why do you ask?”

-“Uhhh…” and now was the scariest part of this meeting - to tell you. Shoto looked at Izuku out of the corner of his eye, looking for an answer as to what to do. -“With Shoto we wanted to ask you something…”

-“Yes…” you said under your breath.

-“Would you like to be with us?” Todoroki asked suddenly, leaning back in his chair.

You and Deku looked shocked at the two-colored man. You dropped your chopsticks as you watched Sho like you saw a ghost. Izuku immediately started waving his arms, trying to reassure you, saying that they were not forcing you to be in relationship with them, that they would not be in a hurry, that they would not be angry if you refused, and ect.

It just took you a moment to process Shoto’s question. They wanted to date you? Really? You were like close friends during your school years, but you didn’t think they had any other than platonic feelings about you. They were both open and comfortable, both shy and anxious around you or when talking to you. You wouldn’t be lying if you said you didn’t have feelings for them in the U.A., but once you found out they were in a relationship, it discouraged you a lot.

-“So?” Todoroki called again.

-“Sho, calm down, give her ti…”

-“Yes.” you replied, getting “Uh!?” from them. - “I accept, I would like to date you.”

-“Really?” Midoriya asked in surprise.

-“Yes…” you said, tying your hands on the table. -“I would just ask for time to get used to, as this will be my first relationship in my life, especially with more than one person.”

-“We’ll give you all the time you need.” Todoroki said, taking your hand in his. Where did you get this confidence? - Izuku wondered.

-”Thanks.”

-“So… should we continue our dinner to celebrate our relationship?” the green-haired man asked cheerfully.

-“Yes!” you and Shoto answered at the same time.

[nari-nim]

hongjoong as your boyfriend

nari note: ah yes, my bias wrecker :’) got requests for mingi and jongho, so they’re coming soon...but who else after them for this series? gif creds go to @hongjooong

Listen, his time is so precious so when he’s spending it with you? You’re precious. He doesn’t bother wasting his time with people who do not add value to his life, so when he’s paying extra attention to you and offering to buy you coffee on the way to work? Someone likes youuuu ;)

Likes to be friends first before dating

You definitely catch him staring at you a lot

He just thinks you’re so beautiful doing the most mundane tasks :((

Will make sure the relationship will work out before asking you out

Or ask him out and he’ll move mountains to make it work

Oh god he takes intimacy and closeness so seriously, so he will be careful about skinship when y’all first date

But he loves the feeling of you in his arms

Or when you back hug him at work

Speaking of work, absolutely the type to produce and sing love songs for you

Like a whole fucking album

But he won’t publish all of the songs for the public, some are simply just for your ears 

Not in the way where all the lyrics are all R-rated, although he will make some of those songs for sure

But like very much likes to pour his heart out into the lyrics and beats, so those songs especially are just for you

He’s so loyal. Will work anything and everything out. 

Love language is quality time (receiving) and acts of service (giving). This combination leads to a lot of romantic and sensual nights in! Think: making dinner together, eating candle lit dinner, warm baths, stuff that leads to more (expanded on later ;)), all those good cliches.

If it’s in the daytime, scenic drives while blasting music, taking photos on film cameras, chilling by the ocean, all of this fits so well with Hongjoong. 

Date where he teaches you how to reform clothes and you end up creating a matching set together. Couple outfit. Couple goals.

Also nap dates!! 

Cuddle him while he gets this well deserved and much needed rest! 

Remembers literally everything you tell him

Very attentive listener, most likely won’t accidentally fall asleep

This means he gives really thoughtful and sentimental gifts, remembers all the important dates, and absolutely will remember that random person in college that hit on you from one singular conversation about them

all or nothing. Just super devoted and loyal.

Will want to help you learn, grow, and pursue your goals. Not exactly a hype man, but will help you slowly and steadily in the background

For example, uses his connections to help point you to the right direction for this risky career choice but won’t take credit for it unless you press him about it

Hmm.. the type to mentally fixate on a problem or try to solve it on his own because he just wants to see you happy, so make sure you try to coax whatever might bother him out so y’all can face the issues together!

But, he’s extremely good at communicating and conflict resolution

After the first few months, arguments are super rare because y’all worked out the biggest issues by then

And if anything comes up, he is so good at actively listening to you, finding compromises, and voicing his needs in a super understanding way

Ugh someone cuff this mans

Speaking of communication, he’s the type to only talk about his deepest worries or insecurities with the closest loved ones in his life so get ready to see a whole new side of him when dating

Will be so vulnerable and open with you so treat him gently and with kindness!

Deep conversations until the late am

A great ear when it comes to listening to you

Always has great, heartfelt advice

He’s someone you can always lean on! He has your back, always

But also make sure to be there for him because we all know he goes through so much and the strongest people need the strongest support

He’s okay with PDA, but not too much in front of people in KQ

Sticks to hand holding and little else

But he is such a cuddle bug in private! He actually lay on top of you or trap you on his lap, not letting you leave unless it’s an emergency

His hugs feel so safe

When y’all cuddle, you always feel so secure, warm, and loved

Dating him is the equivalent of understanding what a deep sense of belonging feels like

Haha y’all should dare each other to try spicy foods 

Because if you like spice/take it well, watch him look at you in amazement and slight horror

And then proceed to sneak the spicy foods in his dish onto your plate whenever y’all eat out together

Even better, you eat the spicy looking food first as his personal taste tester and after a solemn nod, you just quietly take it off his plate for him/move the dish closer to you. You are his superhero.

Or if you can’t take it well like him, at least you both have fun chugging milk together

A true bonding experience either way

NSFW after this

Switch but with an extremely heavy dom lean

Eager to please. More than anything, likes to make sure you’re both pleasuring each other. 

Loves to hear details of your sexual experience and what you like in bed. Simply as a way of getting to know you more. So y’all could literally be talking about choking on his dick casually over lunch. Seonghwa almost spat his drink out while passing by

He is consent king wbk

When y’all first started dating, there were times he forced you to stop kissing him just so he could pressed his forehead against yours and take some ragged breaths, hands gripping at your shoulders tightly, as he pulled himself together and tried to calm down 

Because intense makeout sessions really turn him on

But once you experimentally rock your hips against his, watch his eyes shoot open and look at you with bated anticipation

The first time y’all get down and dirty he’s literally checking in with you before he does anything

Which is so cute, but you’re literally like “just fuck me” at one point

Once he knows your limits though, likes testing them little by little, but always checking in to see how you are doing

Definitely has hard dom potential, especially after both of you get super comfortable

But he still checks in, whether it be gruffly demand your color or pausing to look at you with a questioning look. Just depends on how fucked out you are.

Always coming up with ways to maximize your pleasure, will give everything you suggest a shot

He appreciates visuals. Likes seeing you in his clothes or in lingerie he bought you

Really into orgasm control

He loves loves loves hearing you whine for him

But also

He’s into breath he’s into breath play he’s into breath play he’s into breath play

Hm shamelessly bringing in astrology: so his scorpio ass can actually be quite freaky. But more than anything, he’s very intense during sex. 

But would fuck you as stress relief after a long day 

That… that gets really intense

You’ve used your safe word against him a few times before on those particular days

Also y’all have needy, desperate sex a lot 

Because he’s so busy and you have your own life so when you get to have your time together, it can be a little animalistic the first few rounds

Then it transitions to like love making…very sweet, slow, and sensual :)

OH he is so romantic on anniversaries! He absolutely loves making it special and will spend the night making you shake from pleasure

But on other days where he’s tired as fuck, this is your chance to take care of him! Not necessarily doming him, but being a service top and cuddling him so well afterwards? He honestly loves it so much more than he lets on

Honestly though, I do see him as someone who will let you dom him if you are both feeling it

Not always, but again, he wants to maximize your pleasure

One time he let you top and you started licking his nipples  #hongtiddies and it felt so good for him, you can tell from the way he starts squirming, rutting his hips up at you, and whimpering for you

Got shy before he hit subspace and you used it to mock him a little

Peg him. He'll take it. Like a mess. 

Cums so hard

Was so red after

Pillow talk hits so different

Y’all are both bathing in that post-sex glow, faces inches apart, him kissing your knuckles tenderly, looking deep into your eyes while you both talk about your future, dreams, and aspirations

Whispers his “I love you”s at this time with such sincerity

You can just see the love in his eyes and gentle smile 

</3

[kariachi]

So, I triggered a Very Big Post from Angelo and for some reason reading through it my brain kept going to a topic I’ve only hit on like once in a drabble I think but deserves it own post, regarding a Kevin Headcanon.

We all know he has an unhealthy everything. We’ve all seen the boy, he needs a safe place to rest, steady access to food, a nice long nap, and some serious fucking therapy. Well we’re hitting on a specific point here.

Kevin has a unhealthy relationship with his own anger.

Again, we’ve all seen him. Kevin is an angry person (which makes sense, look at his life) with a quick temper and violent impulses. At one point we see him ready and willing to turn another car and it’s occupants into a pile of burning rubble for going slow on an empty road. We know from that same scene that he’s taken anger management courses, though what kind and how effective they were we don’t know. He’s generally the first on the team to go the aggressive route, and repeatedly does so rashly.

But, we also see points where he would be within his rights to get angry and he simply doesn’t, or brushes it off. A big one being when Vulkanus uses him for materials, where he not only lets him walk away but also keep the taedonite he mined off him. Or after Gwen drops him from near the ceiling of a mine during an argument, only for him to later brush off her apology for not listening to him and not even mention the dropped from the ceiling portion of the altercation. Moments where he’s been done wrong and it would well within his rights to get reasonably pissed, but he doesn’t really.

The immediate assumption would be that this is proof the anger management course worked, except the shit with Vulkanus happens before we hear about any anger management, and we hear about it in tandem with, again, Kevin about to launch missiles at another car.

So, alternate theory- Kevin doesn’t so much curb the worst of his temper as he just shoves it into a little box.

It makes sense given his history (how many times do we see his temper serve him well? tends to be shown just fucking shit up), would explain why Kevin ‘I went to beat a kid up for messing with my car’ Levin would just let some objectively worse shit go, and why some of the times we see a real flare of his temper the response is so out of proportion. Such as, say, nearly blowing up another driver, or during the Ultimate Kevin arc when his rampage includes shit like putting a guy in traction over under $10.

Because anger tends to be viewed as a ‘bad’ emotion, but it’s just as neutral as any other and needs to be managed properly. Not having control of your anger is bad and can cause a lot of problems, but repressing it is also an issue. One that can lead to things like blowing up when you finally let loose. In Kevin’s case near literally. Eventually you’re going to hit a wall and that anger is going to go somewhere. Which is why proper anger management involves learning methods of acknowledging and releasing your anger in a healthy way, while shoddier ones can just worsen things like repression.

It also feeds nicely into my things involving Kevin’s very blatant self worth issues and how they make him an easy target for people looking to take advantage of him or who just aren’t treating him right. Because part of the use of anger is to protect yourself, and when you’ve got a history of your anger only making things worse (and it would just get worse as you try to repress and then blow up and form a whole nasty cycle) and issues with your self worth and whether you deserve whatever is done to you, well. Suddenly you can’t let yourself be angry, and when you do there’s a higher chance of you going overboard or hurting someone (including yourself).

Very not healthy, which really just fits with the boy.

[junova]

.˚✦ ๋࣭ˑ ִֶָ 𓂃 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐢𝐧 𝐡𝐢𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 | 𝐬. 𝐫𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐬

my universe

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

notes: this one has been in my drafts....forever. never really liked it too much but fuck it. maybe i can redeem it in a part 2??? this is more of a prologue if anything. idk we'll see. happy reading!

pairing: modern!steve rogers x reader, former!bucky barnes x reader, bucky barnes x natasha romanoff

concept: bucky was all you'd ever cared about, wanting him more than anyone. until he comes along, showing what it actually means to love someone. welcome to heaven in hiding.

warnings: 18+, sexual content, jealous!reader, bucky being a dick, soft!steve, heavy angst, steve is a funny lil shit at the end

wc: 3.9k

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

It felt unbearable to be here. Watching how fondly she still looked at him, after all this time, not missing a beat. It was suffocating, surrounding you by a sea of water and having no other option than to drown. Greedily, his love swallowing you up in your entirety.

He did really try to dodge her looks of longing but still, even now he felt the pull to her. It didn’t really matter how long they were absent from each others’ lives.

As you sat next to him, you could feel him slipping from your grasp. Far beyond your control, way out of your depth, he was falling. Deep down, you couldn’t really blame him. The pictures you’d seen of her did no justice, she was truly a vision. Much brighter than you would ever glow and it made you wonder if what he spoke just a few hours ago still held meaning.

Not to mention, she seemed to be as beautiful on the inside as she was on the outside. Making you grow even more envious of her.

Sure, she had broken his heart but it wasn’t beyond forgiveness. She had simply put herself before the relationship and if you had been in her shoes you could imagine yourself doing the same. All she wanted was a better future for herself, at least it’s what he had told you.

Now sitting here you couldn’t stop thinking about how she looked at him with admiration and love laced in her eyes. Truly, if she still wanted him in her arms there was nothing stopping her.

Surely, not you. You two seemed to live on two different planes of beauty and hers was the kind you dream of having but only have a very little probability of obtaining. With her ruby hair and glossy lips, tempting nearly everyone around her to the way she carried herself and spoke to you like you were the only person she was invested in.

It wasn’t difficult to see why he spoke of her so much. You would, too.

You tried to enjoy the wonderfully prepared meal Pepper and Tony had made, well mainly Pepper. It was delicious, but your senses had gone bitter and it had nothing to do with the food.

You weren’t sure when you started to drift off, maybe it was when Bucky began looking at Natasha like she hung each and every constellation in the sky. Or maybe it’s when you heard her melodic laugh when Bucky delivered the punchline.

It was like Steve, Wanda, and Thor didn’t exist. The lovely couple in their own little bubble, speaking in a language only the two of them understood. Utterly and completely unaware of any and all of their surroundings.

“You okay?” Steve questioned, placing his hand on top of your hand, giving it a small squeeze. Discreetly and under the table away from prying eyes.

“Yeah, I’m fine. I think I just need some air.” You weren’t sure what could remove the nothingness inside of you, but maybe some space would provide some comfort.

You felt like your heart had been ripped out right in front of you, again. He said he wouldn’t do it again, that he wanted to be with you, but all she had to do was come to town and he’d been chasing her just like he always did.

Excusing yourself you dipped out until you were out on the back patio. Alone to just think and mull over any little thing that should have tipped you off, but didn’t. You let it slide on, blinded by how much you thought you loved him.

You weren’t left in the peaceful night long, until Steve was joining you with two wine glasses in one hand and a bottle of red in the other.

“You looked like you could use a glass or two.” Steve gibed carefully. “I’m just using your sour mood as an excuse to escape from the party.” You were about to object when a full glass of wine was shoved into your grasp.

“I’m not in a sour mood. I’m just swell.” You spoke before taking a big swing of the drink, nearly emptying it’s contents, sending it barreling down your throat.

“Sure, honey. Just like the green monster isn’t oozing out of you.” You found yourself intentionally growling at him, just a little agitated of the truth he spoke.

The absolute audacity on this man seemed to never end. Whether it helped you or caused more misery than he intended.

“It certainly doesn’t help that she's so goddamn perfect. Was she fucking made in a lab? Jesus Christ.” You were jealous and if Steve already knew there was really no point in hiding it. It was written all over you, the longing look you were giving Bucky all night, desperately wanting to be the one he wanted.

“She’s not perfect, nobody is. Just better at hiding her faults than everybody else.” He said it like it was some known fact. Something you should’ve already known, but insecurities tended to eat you alive. Truthfully, it didn’t help that Bucky acted like Natasha walked on water in his hopeful, gleaming eyes. Stinging you like a bee piercing your soft, plush skin for the first time.

He really loved her. It didn’t matter how many times she messed up, what he felt was all the same — she was the one.

“Really? I don’t buy it. Name one.” Steve perched himself on his knees in front of you, his hands on the armrest of the chair you made yourself comfortable in. “Okay.”

“How about the fact that she loves Bucky just about more than anyone else but she’s too selfish to let him go? Then, for months she leads him on and promises she’ll come home but always leaves him heartbroken.” Steve let it flow all in one breath, as his body rested between your legs.

“Sounds gruesome.” You confessed because it hit a little close to home. “Yeah, it is and he has no right to do the same thing to an angel like you.”

You hated how he was right, truly hated it, but anyone with eyes could see how much Bucky dragged you through the mud. He had a good heart, but it just hadn’t been good to you.

Bucky’s intentions weren’t malicious and it didn’t seem like he was either but it didn’t take away from how much he continued to hurt you. All of the unintended consequences only affected you as he went on with his day.

Over and over, he continued to cause you pain and he didn’t even know it. Or he did and just neglected to acknowledge it. If he did, he’d actually have to deal with just how much he was actually hurting you.

It wasn’t like either one was particularly gunning for the latter, but Steve was. It wasn’t the first time Bucky had left you high and dry whenever the red head, beauty stepped foot into town. Although it was the first time you had a front row seat to the attention she commanded from him.

You both sat there in silence for the moment, taking in the starry night as he rested his cheek against your leg. He began running fingertips up and down your exposed calf, letting him soothe you.

“I’ll keep thinking I’ll be alright. That’ll get over him, but he just keeps pulling me back and jerking me around for his ride and I let him.” If anyone saw you besides Steve, you didn’t think you could handle it but you’re comfortable around him.

He’s continuously been there for you everytime Bucky pushed to the side for her. Always so sweet, so tender, comforting you in his warmth. Never once judging you, always taking the time time to just sit and listen to you.

“I don’t think it’s even about him anymore. I’m just chasing this unattainable moment, just so I fill this void in me. Maybe if he loves me I can love me, too.” Mumbling under your breath, hoping he didn’t hear you.

“Bubba.” You smiled for a second, as his voice dripped in concern. “You don’t need him or what little he can offer. Not when you can love yourself better than anyone else can.” He pulled himself up to his feet, picking you up from the chair until you were surrounded by just him.

“We love you. I love you, so stop listening to those nasty little thoughts, bubs. They’re far from the truth. You are truly amazing, incredibly beautiful, and deserve the absolute world.” With slight pressure from his index, he tilted your chin up, letting your eyes drown in his.

“Don’t expect anything less.” Steve breathed out, before testing the waters. He just held you there, caressing your back as you just sunk in his arms, allowing his warmth to ease your hurt. Just like he’d done so many times before.

Somehow, Steve seemed to know exactly what you need to hear. You didn’t know how he managed to be so wonderful all the time. Maybe you could just stay there forever with him shielding you from every single evil in the world out to get you.

“Can you take me somewhere? This is the last place I want to be.” Steve simply nodded before lacing your hand in his, before making your way back inside.

The moment the two of you stepped foot into the house, it was silent. Everyone looked at the two of you. Steve took notice of the Bucky’s bugged eyes at the joined hands of his two best friends, but knew better than to verbally acknowledge it.

It wasn’t something Steve and you hadn’t done, but never in the prying eyes of Bucky. Thor and Wanda had taken note of it a few times, but never spoke a word about it. Secretly, Wanda hoped it meant something for you, because she could see just how much Steve adored you.

He never spoke a word, so you remained clueless to a feeling he never felt like he had a right to speak on. No matter how strongly he felt, he knew if he confessed, it would do more damage than good.

You had become one of his closest friends in the past few years he’d known you and he wouldn’t jeopardize it for anything. Selfishly, he left you under Bucky’s radar because being your friend was far safer than risking the rejection he was sure would be sent his way.

He knew you were close to cutting Bucky off from your life completely, he just had to wait it out. Natasha being here tonight was the icing on the cake for Steve, because all he had to do was be here for in a way Bucky never could. Not when he was slicing through your heart every time his attention diverted from you to her.

Just because he was stuck in a past love instead of the future and Steve would fully take advantage of it — being there for you in any way you needed.

Regardless of everything, he wanted to — needed to. He couldn’t live with himself if he let you go through the hurt and heartache alone. Not when so many times you had seeked the comfort of him to lean on. Steve would never be one to say no to you.

“Are you leaving, doll?” The endearment Bucky intended to be sweet but left a sour taste in your mouth. More than that, you didn’t miss the way Natasha’s eyes widened slightly at the use of his pet name for you. The one she thought was only reserved for her.

Maybe if he held affection for you like he did earlier today, your heart would be filled to the brim, but he didn't. So, you weren’t. “Yeah, Steve’s going to take me home. I have an early morning tomorrow and I’ve already had a bit too much wine.” Bucky didn’t argue, nodding with a tight lipped smile.

Perhaps his indifference is what made you hurt even more. He didn’t care about anything, not even you with you so closely tangled with Steve. It didn’t have an effect on him because the woman sitting by his side, draped over him held more value than you ever could.

“You sure? I can make sure you get home safely.” Bucky pleaded, but before you could respond Steve did.

“I got it, Buck. I’ll make sure she gets home.” He looked like he wanted to say more but he decided to stay silent as he watched you walk out the door with Steve, hand and hand.

The drive home in the Uber was silent, Steve didn’t say a word, just the weight of his arm holding you close. He took note of how you refused to look at anything but the luminescence of the New York’s city lights captivating your vision.

Even if it hurt Bucky only chose you whenever Natasha wasn’t around you couldn’t help but focus on how hot and heated your body felt with Steve so close to you. Holding you so tightly like he was afraid you would let go.

Perhaps it was a bit shady of you to drape yourself over his childhood best friend whenever he rejected you, but now you were finding yourself finding solace in Steve in everything, like you used to with Bucky. He had become this safe place for you, where you wouldn’t be shamed for how you felt or what you were going through.

Even if he knew how much you were hurting from your own obliviousness to Bucky’s behavior, he always let you find solace in his strong, comforting arms. Always sturdy enough to hold the weight of your hurt and what he was carrying too. Just like tonight.

“He’s never going to love me the way I want him to — like the way he loves her.” It wasn’t a question any longer, it was a stone cold fact. Something you’d tried to ignore over the past year, especially.

Not wanting anything in this moment but him, you laid your head on his chest, his steady heartbeat giving you a sense of peace in the aftermath of your heartbreak. The crisp material of the white button up he was wearing shifted from the weight of you, he didn’t really mind.

“I think it’s time for me to let go of this image I have of him, one he can never live up to and accept him for who he is and where he’s at right now.” Steve nodded, still not saying a word, slipping farther and farther away from you as he let his thoughts consume him entirely.

It’d been happening a lot more lately. This. The close, excruciating intimacy between Steve and the woman he was in love with.

Over the past few months, anytime you were upset about something, you would show up at his doorsteps crashing into him as you wept. Always wanting to be close to him, snuggled up to his side, bleeding your heart out to him, something you hadn’t done with anyone.

Not even Bucky.

Then there was the one kiss on New Years’ Eve a few weeks ago which stayed imprinted on the forefront of his mind. He remembered when he woke up the following morning, he was holding you to his chest, the both of you bodies laced with one another.

He got up before you were there to consciously witness it, but it was all he thought about weeks after. Being that close awoke the need to be near you. It was already there, but now he knew how it felt to hold you in the comfort of his own bed.

It nearly killed him when you woke up, making your way down the stairs from his bedroom, wearing nothing but his boxers and the shirt he wore last night. Steve wasn’t drunk enough to completely forget the whole night, nothing had happened in his room last night. Seeing you, in here, in his apartment, made him think what his life could possibly be like with you here.

If he was ever to be so lucky.

As of yesterday, when you told him Bucky finally wanted to move forward with you, it broke him. Even if he kept his true feelings hidden, he felt you crush his heart with one fatale squeeze. Any particular hope he once had, was diminished into a fantasy far from reality.

The both of you were Steve’s best friends — he had to be happy for you.

Then, Natasha came to town. Storming through Bucky’s heart just like she’s always done. When Steve invited you to the dinner his best friend was trying to keep you from, he knew it could possibly be the last fatale blow to whatever string your relationship with Buck was. Maybe his, too.

Steve knew going after you could mean losing his really good friend, but he simply couldn’t stop himself. Not when you were a pure goddess ascending from above in all of your glory, capturing his heart in every single glance you threw his way. At this point, he didn’t care what it’d cost him.

As long as he had you, it would be worth it.

When the car pulled up to your street, you let your hand glide down his chest, resting on his lower abdomen. Not missing the way his body trembled under your touch, the thin material of his shirt doing nothing to protect him from you — not that he wanted to be anywhere but here.

As soon as those sinful words left your mouth, he knew he was done for.

Perhaps, if the both of you hadn’t been tipsy of the bottle of wine you shared, you wouldn’t feel the urge to invite him up, but he smelled too good and acted too perfect for any other consideration.

“Do you want to come inside, Stevie?” You purred watching the gears switch in his mind. Contemplating if he really should go through with it. Now that it was within his reach, he was becoming hesitant to grab it. You were drunk, he was drunk. Hence the uber and the both of your cars left behind in Tony and Pepper’s driveway.

“I don’t think it’s the best idea for me to go up there, bubs.” Instantly, you pouted. A deep frown etched on your beautiful face. “Why not? I think it would be a wonderful thing. Don’t you?” With one swift movement, you were cupping his crotch, making your intentions more than clear.

The grunt leaving Steve’s mouth was animalistic as he tried to exercise the very little restraint he was holding onto. It seemed to become increasingly difficult as you refused to move your hand away.

“I need you to take care of me and I’ll take care of you.” Finally releasing your grip on him, you exited out of the car and you didn’t have to look back to know he was falling you into the lobby of your apartment building.

After a silent elevator ride, with you tucked into his side you made the walk down the narrow hallway into your home, fidgeting to open the door with Steve’s hands caressing your sides. Carefully watching as you kicked off the painful heels, the bottom of your feet thankful, pulling you deeper into the apartment.

“We don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to.” You retreated, afraid someone else might turn you down, too. If Steve did, you wouldn’t be able to handle it. He’s been your person you can count on and now you couldn’t imagine your life without him.

Stopping your movement once you reached your bedroom, you were still waiting for his response. Meticulously, he reached for hand before twirling you around your back pressed against his front. Sighing, when his hand dragged up your spine, while the other hung on your waist with his hand pressed against your stomach.

Pushing the thin strap of your velvet dress, letting it fall off your shoulder. Soft, firm lips touching your soft skin, you couldn’t help but lean back into him. Tilting your head back, offering yourself up to him on a silver platter.

His touch felt like heaven and you didn’t think you’d ever want him to leave. Not when you always felt safe wrapped up in his large muscular arms. Never making you question if you felt wanted.

“Right now, my body wants you as badly as it ever has.” Steve confessed while his lips migrated towards your neck, giving you some much needed attention.

“Does it?” You questioned him, losing any other train of thought as let his other hand push the other strap off your shoulder, the slinky dress falling to floor pooling at your feet.

“It does, sweetheart, but it’ll have to wait.” Already pouting like the brat you were, ready to seduce him right into filling you up, just like you brought him here tonight for.

Dropping down to your level, Steve whispers in your ear, “Because when I fuck you just the way your pussy is aching for it won’t be when you’re drunk, princess.” Throwing gasoline on the fire he created, sharply he bit your earlobe, making you moan.

“I’ve thought about this so much, princess. At first, I thought I would take you from behind, but then I wouldn’t see those begging, doe-eyes itching for a release.” You were trembling for him. His filthy words flooding straight to your slick, crying for him already.

“Maybe you’d want to ride me, huh? Do you want to fuck yourself on my fat cock?” At this point, if it was anyone else, you’d be embarrassed if he found out just how wet you were. Your panties are completely ruined because of him.

“I want to ride you so bad, Stevie.” Maliciously, he laughed before giving your clothed pussy a rough slap, causing you to gasp out. Your nails digging themselves into his bicep as you reached for it.

“Well, if you had been a good girl, maybe I’d let you cum on my cock.” You turned around face to face, ready to bruise your knees for him in a heartbeat. In this space and time, you’ve never wanted anyone more.

Harshly, he gripped your chin as his thumb smoothed over your bottom lip, dragging it down so it plumped right back up. “Bucky will be here tomorrow morning, if not tonight. I took his precious little play thing home and he’s not gonna like that one bit.”

“He wants to have his cake and eat it, too. If you want to let him, by all means go right ahead. And if you don’t? You know where I live, princess.” Very much in contrast to the last few minutes, he sweetly kissed your cheek and headed out right back the door without so much as a second glance.

Leaving you with a hell of a lot to process.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

tagging: @tonystankschild | @andromedasstarship | @tinylumpiaa | @brattycherubwrites | @bval-1 | @kayteewritessteve |

[lady-of-lyon]

So, I made one post a while back about how awesomely feminist the show Wild Kratts was, with how its two main female characters were women of color in engineering and deserving roles of power, female villains who weren’t motivated by spite or quest for youth, etc, but today I wanted to talk about something slightly different, that I’ve wanted to cover for a while now, because I also think it’s very good - and that’s how the show portrays masculinity, in a way that’s really positive!

First, we have our two main characters, Chris and Martin Kratt. Keep in mind these two are basically self-inserts - and there are plenty of creators, especially males, who have used self-insert characters in really scummy ways - all I have to say is Powerpuff Girls reboot and you know exactly what I’m talking about. Even if they weren’t literal self-inserts, male characters, superheroes especially, oftentimes serve the male power fantasy, being just the strong, stoic, all-powerful person so many boys are told they’re supposed to be. I could get into a whole discussion about how the male power fantasy is present even when males are not (ever look through a fashion magazine and wonder why there are so few men? Sure, part of it is that the industry thrives off exploiting women’s insecurities, and men aren’t as concerned for their appearance, but another part of it is so that the guy, looking through it, can feel like he has no competition for these women - there’s a reason so many comedians have jokes about fashion magazines being their sexual awakening as kids. It’s really scummy) but that’s not what this is about. So, the bros had every opportunity to do just that - make themselves these traditional heroes who aren’t actually really good role models, like batman or what have you. It’s certainly not uncommon for celebrity cartoons to do stuff like that. But Martin and Chris chose a different approach. They’re pretty strong standouts for positive masculinity. They’re openly affectionate - both with eachother as brothers, and with their friends. They cry, sometimes over little things - most of the time when big superheroes cry, it’s ‘cause they lost the girl they loved or their mentor or something like that, only in the big, most agonizing moments do they shed a tear. But here, Chris or Martin will cry just because they’ve had a bad day, or because they’re overwhelmed and overjoyed that someone named a mantis after them! In a lot of shows or movies when a guy cries over something little, it’s usually played for laughs, or to emasculate him, but here it’s casual without being unreasonable or overdone. The brothers cry just ad much, maybe even more (haven’t gone back and counted or anything) as the girls do. Not to mention, it’s a very nice depiction of a loving, healthy sibling relationship. As the youngest sibling myself, it’s refreshing to see a pair who don’t abuse eachother with noogies or cruel and snarky remarks. When they do fight, it’s never a screaming match, and also because they had a conflict of interest or disagreed over a fact, not because, say, one of them stole the other’s shirt or is neglecting the other’s feelings. Kids, being very impressionable, get exposed to a lot of abusive sibling relationships played as normal in media, and start thinking this is how siblings are and should act. For instance, my sister (who is now my best friend and has gotten over all these bad habits over time) when she was younger watched a lot of Kim Possible, a show that is great, but has a bad family dynamic with Kim and her little siblings. The “tweebs” as she calls them are always irresponsible, destructive, and making Kim annoyed to no end. My older brother was one of the most polite, reserved, kind little kids, but she still treated him like he was a brat and a nuisance, because that’s what shows like Kim Possible taught her little brothers were. Additionally, I was always treated like a spoiled crybaby who just wanted attention and got away with everything - I was not any of those things, ever, but that’s what shows teach you little sisters are. Sure, Wild Kratts has a smidge of that, with Chris seemingly being the stereotype of the know-it-all little sibling, but instead of being constantly looked town upon for being too “perfect” like with Hailey Long in American Dragon, Martin often praises his brother for his abilities. Sure, Martin gets annoyed when Chris tries to correct him on things, like in the episode Wolf Hawks, but everyone else does too, so it feels more like a take-down of mansplaining than a sibling spat.

I talked too in the feminist post about how refreshing it is that Chris and Martin more or less willingly put themselves under the authority of Koki and Aviva, two women of color. I don’t think it’s possible to say any one character is the “leader,” they all work as a evenly balanced team, but it’s safe to say that Koki and Aviva make the more responsible decisions. The bros try to get out of their calls a few times, but the show plays it more like they’re being irresponsible, and less like they’re renegade cool dudes who don’t take nothing from nobody, especially not two girls. They are pretty much always punished via karma for their reckless choices, most especially in To Touch a Hummingbird, where their arrogant attitudes blow up in their faces rather spectacularly. We also never see the narrative most present in sitcoms, where the male leads mess up and go out of their way to cover it up and ultimately gets away with it - after all, you have to root for them, right, because sure they messed up and had no consequences, but aren’t they just so lovable? No, here Martin and Chris always have to fix their wrongdoing, and it’s always deserved when they get comeuppance. Another aspect of the show I like is that, many times, when the bros get captured or are in peril, they are saved by the women - and most refreshing of all, there’s never a moment of “wink wink nudge nudge wow I can’t believe I had to be rescued by a GIRL” or even “wow you saved me you’re pretty good honey guess I shouldn’t have underestimated you, you go girl!” No, when the girls save them, it’s just - you know, relief? Because they were saved? It’s never a scenario played as an exception, or any more dire than when the bros need to rescue eachother. The bros are genuinely happy to have them as teammates. The show even did the standard “boys vs girls” episode in the form of When Fish Fly - but instead of being actually girls vs. boys, it’s engineers vs. adventurers. There’s nothing really gendered about it - the girls happen to be engineers, and the boys happen to be adventurers. And the episode doesn’t end with the boys being “wow gosh darn I shouldn’t have doubted you girls are better at everything,” it’s a mutual agreement that both parties have hard jobs. Basically, the bros are very naturally respectful of women. That plays more into their feminist narrative too, but either way, it’s refreshing.

Then, we have Jimmy! Jimmy, the lovable gamerboy pizza man. At first glance Jimmy seems like the stereotypical cowardly, pathetic, emasculated loser. He’s frightened of most things, as of yet has no power suit, and he BAKES for crying out loud! But none of these things are framed as terribly bad traits. Sure, we laugh when he screams and runs from an animal, but though it happens over and over, the crew doesn’t get sick of it. They don’t berate him or belittle him because he’s so gosh darn cowardly. There’s a great scene in Rattlesnake Crystal where Jimmy has to deliver something to the bros alone, in the middle of a spooky desert. He is terrified the whole time, sprinting off after he delivers the goods. When Martin and Chris run into him, they don’t laugh at him for being spooked, they just greet and then bid fair well to their friend. To them, this is just Jimmy, and there’s nothing wrong with it. Jimmy isn’t coddled, but he is reassured many times that he’s a valuable member of the team. I love that little message, that you’re just as important of a person even if you can’t do as much or have greater limits. When his friends do try to get him over his fears, it’s not because they have to, that the day will somehow be ruined by Jimmy’s incompetence p, but because they’re his friends, and want him to experience fun and wonderful things that he would otherwise miss out on. But what Jimmy CAN do is just as important! Jimmy is a gamer, which in a lot of shows, is portrayed as a lazy, useless, mindless hobby. But here, because he plays video games, it makes him essential for piloting the ship and teleporting important items. There’s always the joke that video games improves your hand/eye coordination, but recent studies have shown it has much better effects. It can make you much better at keeping track of multiple moving objects and processing technical but variable information- two traits which, fittingly enough, are really really important for air traffic controllers and airplane pilots! He also demonstrates a lot more courage behind the wheel of the Tortuga, which makes sense - in an impersonal setting, he would have more sense of calm and control and courage, because it’s so similar to a video game world. It’s not all too different with how I feel more emboldened to pick fights with people on the internet, but get crazy anxious if a real person so much as looks at me. So Jimmy’s love of video games isn’t because he’s irresponsible, it has real benefits. A quick last point - Jimmy also eats a lot, but they thankfully don’t make him fat or greedy or anything like that. He never takes food from people, he actually bakes, and shares it with others! Having the baker be a boy is a lovely touch.

I might do another post about the toxic masculinity of the two villains, (or four villains, I guess, if I wanna discuss the minions) but I’ve got other work to do, and this post is long enough already, so I’ll get around to it later. I’ll sum it up with this - Wild Kratts is a show that teaches boys it’s not only ok to be kind, but essential. The brothers protect defenseless animals, advocate for things “icky” and “weird,” like bugs or snakes or worms - not because they’re boys, and boys like icky things, but because they genuinely see the beauty in all life, and are encouraging us to slow down and do the same. The Wild Kratts are heroes who save the world not by being the strongest or smartest or coolest, but by looking after those who are exploited and vulnerable, who are essential to the world, even if they can’t always do everything. In Wild Kratts the only weaknesses a man can have isn’t what he can’t do, but what he does do that he shouldn’t have. Sure, it’s a cute show about two funny guys who have cool powers, but it’s also a show about accountability, compassion, respect and trust. The show says “boys will be boys” in all the right ways - Martin is a lovable goof with a heart of gold, but he still has to get his act together when he messes up, and he’s still creative and smart and openly sensitive. Chris is a bit of a know-it-all show-off, but he can also mess up as much as his brother, and is still bold, brave, adventurous, and can put his money where his mouth is. Jimmy is a cowardly, napping, eating machine video-gamer, but he’s still a valued member of the team, has incredible skills and talents, and will always help his friends, even if he is really, really scared. It is so important to have role models like these, in a world dominated by unhealthy machismo. The Wild Kratts are heroes who save the world - both animated, and real.

All they need now is a canon queer character, and I’ll stan them forever! My money’s on Aviva!!

[byulsgrease]

if you arent too busy, can you write a idol!hwasa x idol!reader, wherein they both have to practice with each other for a special stage. However on the first meeting they become starstruck and cant believe somethings are real, but soon warm up to each other?

i'm not terribly busy but this still took a while anyway oops - sorry this took so long anon! here you go :D

if anyone has requests for the other members hmu cuz I've got 2 more hyejin reqs after this one (not that I'm complaining)

"who says we can't do something on our own?"

(hwasa x idol!reader, ~1.2k words)

cw: food + alcohol mention (y'all know how it is)

I named someone Minjeong - it's not Aespa's Winter, idk anything about 4th gen gg's - 민정 is my Korean name so it's just what came to mind

"Hey, wake up. You've gotta see this. GET UP," a voice piercing through the fog of your sleep.

What a rude awakening. Your shoulders being shaken vigorously by a pair of small hands meant they belonged to none other than Minjeong, your youngest group member. You rolled over to glare menacingly at her with one eye open, trying to pull your brain out of the slumber. All you could see was the bright light of her phone shining in your eyes - a video of some kind. But then you heard the audio:

"Have you seen the clip?" asked the interviewer.

"Yes, my members and many MooMoos made sure I saw it"— Moos? Oh, it's Hwasa. WAIT. Both your eyes flew open as you sat up and snatched Jeongie's phone out of her hand to stare at the video. Your mind immediately flashed back to the interview you did last week - they asked who you most wanted to collaborate with, if there were no limitations. Your ears started to heat up at the sheer thought of the flustered mess of an answer you gave - of course you said Hwasa. Both of you debuted relatively close to each other, within a year, but never interacted much over the years. Mamamoo as a group was a force to be reckoned with, but there was just something about Hwasa specifically. You mostly just admired her unique singing voice and undeniable stage presence, and her relentless drive to always be herself in an industry constantly trying to fit women into a box.

Finally snapping out of re-living that embarrassment, your attention turned back to the phone in your hand. The interviewer must've asked her to send a message in response to you, because you couldn't believe that she was waving and saying, "How haven't we gotten to know each other better over all these years? I'd love to work with you on something sometime," curtly dipping her head in a slight bow.

"SEE? You needed to see that," Minjeong rushed to say, full of energy. "And close your mouth, your jaw's on the floor," jokingly pointing.

You side-eyed her and shut your mouth. "Is this what Loco felt like when she called him during Hyena on the Keyboard?" you wondered aloud.

"At least she's not calling you while on camera," she commented, knowing full well that you'd probably embarrass yourself again if she did. "But hey, at least she noticed you! Can I have my phone back now?" It would be a dream come true to collaborate with her, but cross-company collabs... always a pain. that couldn't be helped. The fantasy abruptly ended with demands from your rumbling stomach. Done with your what-if's, you placed the phone back in your maknae's outstretched hand to get up and make breakfast.

~~~~

With award show season rolling around, the crazy scramble of rehearsing for special live stages without leaking sets and collabs began. Checking your email that morning showed a schedule to record the backing track for a special live stage, but that was it. With who? You texted your members a screenshot, but they all told you that block of time in their schedule was empty. A solo stage? The solo mini-album you released this cycle did relatively well, the title track got a music show win, but not a multi-week chart-topper by any means. Possibilities turning over in your mind, you stepped out from your place to head to the company, totally in the dark about what was in store.

The recording studio always smelled the same along with the couches, a comfort for all the insanely long nights and crack-of-dawn early mornings over the years. With a bit of time to kill, you plopped down on one and gingerly patted the worn cushions as some kind of symbolic thank-you for supporting you (literally).

A hesitant but loud knock sent your gaze directly to the door. Watching it slowly open, you leaned forward to see who it was. Needless to say, your jaw fell to the floor again as you clapped a hand over your gaping mouth, eyes widening. Like a soldier obeying a command, you immediately stood up as straight as possible and bowed profusely at Hwasa, sporting a very similar expression on her face (which you failed to notice, your mind running a million miles a minute).

After a series of frantic bows and miscellaneous utterances to each other, she spoke. "It's nice to finally meet you," she said with calm, surveying your frenzied state. "I guess we're granting that collab wish from your interview, huh?"

The red-hot embarrassment leapt to your face. "I...I definitely made a fool of myself answering that question. And our maknae showed me your interview clip too, which was cool, but never did I think it would actually happen," you stammered. I should probably stop talking.

"Well, here I am," she half-smiled coolly. "Let's get started, I'm really looking forward to finally work with you on this," a gleam in her eye and a hint of excitement in her voice.

The studio suddenly felt a lot smaller with her in it, despite there only being your managers, the producer, and the both of you - less people than you and your members alone. Both of you remained relatively quiet the whole time, rather unsure of what to say or talk about. You watched enough MMMTV to know that all the members on their own were shyer than together, and Hwasa knew the same was true for you. But the work basically took care of itself, seamlessly taking turns in the recording booth, witnessing each other's work style and process. The both of you knew your way in front of a mic, seasoned professionals by now. Upon wrapping up, you bowed politely to each other after a quick exchange of KaTalk info, a short and sweet goodbye.

That was... anticlimactic. I mean, it's finally happening - I can't believe it. But maybe I was too idealistic about maybe creating a meaningful relationship with her outside of work... What does she think of me?

~~~~

In the days leading up to the collab stage, you kept going back and forth on whether to reach out or not, despite now being in possession of her contact info. What would you even say? Thoughts of a witty one-liner or relatable meme came to mind, but maybe she'd assume the worst - that you were clout-chasing, or something. Anxieties abuzz, your phone vibrated in your pocket. The KaTalk notification sprawled across your screen. Speak of the devil, it's her.

"Hey, awards season has me stressed. I know you must pretty busy right now too, but I somehow get off early tomorrow if you wanna grab dinner after work?" You had to reread that one. Oh, what? She's inviting me?

Trying not to be weird about responding too quickly, you typed out, "Wow, yeah, that sounds great! ^^ wait, your company doesn't care about you going out to eat during award season?"

"nah, they stopped having that kind of control over us a while ago, we are the money-maker of the company, after all 😏"

"so I guess this means they don't check your phone either ㅋㅋㅋ"

"nope :)"

You proceeded to set a time and place to meet, someplace with meat.

In the process of feasting on an inordinate amount of gopchang imbued with a splash of beer, you learned a fair amount about each other. You talked career, professional aspirations, the weird habits of your members, and more. What surprised you most was the amount of things she already knew about you, having admitted to watching some of your behind-the-scenes content after seeing your interview clip.

"Ah... I'm sorry if I came across as distant during that first recording session," she confessed, pausing to sip her beer. "I honestly didn't know what to do with myself, I felt a little star-struck."

"Oh what?? I felt the exact same, so no worries - and sorry if I came off similarly distant," you rambled back. A bit of silence fell between you, acknowledging the mutual sentiment. You spoke up after a bit, "Thanks for inviting me out tonight, I didn't realize how much I needed this."

"Thank you for making the time, I had fun getting to know you better," she articulated with a smile. "Maybe it'll make the collab stage better," she added on jokingly. You responded with a nod and expression of mutual affirmation.

~~~~

After that, messaging each other became a regular occurrence, that gopchang outing having broken the ice. Honestly, you tried your best to talk about anything besides work, but the baseline of shared understanding connected you in a way that came more naturally than it did with your non idol friends.

You stood across the way from her at the sound check for the final stage, dressed in joggers and slides. Funny to think that you'd be recording this for real in a couple hours, making eyes with the blinking red light on the cameras surrounding you. It sucks that fans wouldn't get to experience the energy and atmosphere of the performance - Hyejin alone is one thing, but adding someone else into her stage presence? Unmatched. There's nothing quite like a live performance - and while you knew everyone in the industry dealt with the consequences of the pandemic, it certainly took a toll to perform and not feel the energy from fans. But realistically, nothing you could do about it. The sound check went over smooth like butter. The stage chemistry came flowing naturally between you both, even when bare-faced and dressed in just sweats.

And when the time came for the actual filming, you both absolutely killed it, an upbeat mash-up of TWIT and your title track. At the very end came a sliver of hesitation before throwing your arms around each other with a big smile for the ending fairy, proud of the work you accomplished together, and a mental fist-pump to yourself for making friends with one of the industry's finest.

Once again walking to a restaurant that served mostly meat to celebrate, you playfully proposed, "We... should do that again sometime." A little puff of air came out her nose in amusement.

"Yeah, we should. Too bad we're gonna have to wait a whole cycle before we can release anything else together again," she sighed longingly.

"Who says we can't do something on our own?"

[dinosaurtsukki]

bsd as their zodiac signs | the decay of angels

a/n: i love writing for these nerds in case you couldn’t tell however i haven’t written actual headcanons in a long time so pls forgive me if its not that good ;-;

fyodor dostoevsky | scorpio

i swear to fucking god i love astrology so much because it confirms my compatibility with my fave anime characters 

scorpios are known for being dark and edgy and while i think that’s kind of stereotypical, it does apply to our russian man

but what i think about most when it comes to scorpios is that they’re very intense when it comes to their convictions, kind of like fire signs 

also very secretive and mysterious, which we can really see in fyodor’s character. the only time he’ll tell the truth is when it actually benefits him

he can be very blunt though when speaking to people in a more casual setting. he just doesn’t see the benefit of beating around the bush and expects that people should be able to handle criticism (no matter how harsh it may be)

when it comes to relationships, he can definitely be obsessive and controlling

i adamantly believe that fyodor is the clingy type. like, he won’t show it in public and in front of other people and he hates when you bring it up, but he’s clingy

it’s part of him being obsessive and he loves being a dom in the relationship. the more you rely on him the more he loves it

i’m sorry i think i’m just straight-up simping here

a fucking expert at riling people up he doesn’t even need to try

scorpios have a better handle on their emotions compared to other water signs and fyodor is exactly that

nikolai gogol | aries

lmao no wonder him and fyodor get along so well (scorpio x aries is a pretty good dynamic)

nikolai’s excitable energy and also his stage presence is very aries, he loves drawing attention to himself

he can be more than a little impulsive and competitive though. he’s always looking for ways to spice up his boredom

LOVES playing games of any sort (lmao decay of angels board game night) but he hates it when he loses (and he always loses to fyodor)

he’ll sulk after losing but it’s only for like twenty seconds and then he’s asking to play another game

aries tend to have a bit of a problem with authority because they prefer having their own agenda and being the one to lead

and with nikolai we can see that even though he’s part of the decay of angels, he still ultimately has his own motives

also him valuing his own freedom and self is very aries

going into relationships, nikolai is definitely one who has a lot of surprises in store

would definitely take you traveling and make last-minute date plans

not shy with his affection at all but at the same time, he doesn’t quite have a filter so expect him to go ‘hey babe, you look like a mess’ during one of your dates 

upside though is that he’s’ very affectionate and loves to call you all the embarrassing nicknames that exist

if you compliment him he’d love that so much too

sigma | birthday not mentioned but i’m hc-ing him as a virgo

i feel like the kind of person who’d run a sky casino the way sigma does would be a virgo because they’re amazing at task management

he’s very meticulous and pays so much attention to detail that nothing escapes him

a lot of his identity is connected to his sense of responsibility towards other people 

definitely the mom friend around fyodor and nikolai even though he doesn’t know them that well (highkey judges them too but keeps it to himself)

actually he’s judging people 90% of the time and trying so hard to keep quiet about it but that’s nothing compared to how sigma judges himself

but if you ask him for an honest opinion please be prepared to have your feelings hurt cause he can be just too honest

also not the most emotionally affectionate and the most he’ll do when your sad is awkwardly pat your back and ask if you want food

but he’s amazing at remembering things. you could off-handedly mention this new dress you saw in a shop and a week later it’s wrapped in a nice box on your bed

also sigma never forgets date nights or birthdays or anniversaries. actually, he’ll be sprinting towards the restaurant five minutes before your date if he has a full day of work

he rarely ever asks for it either but sigma is terribly touch-starved, especially since he works so hard and has to keep up a certain composure the entire day

please just let him fall into your arms at the end of the day and promptly take a nap he’d love you so much for it

▸ 🎕 ┈┈┈┈ 🎕 ┈┈┈┈ 🎕 ┈┈┈┈ 🎕 ┈┈┈┈ 🎕 ◂

taglist (check out my post for details on being part of my taglist): @kiyoobi @atsumusdomain @laure-chan @goodfoodxoxoxo @guardianangelswings @ah-kaashi @loisuke @whootwhoot @liz-multifandom-hotel @kac-chowsballs @violentfarewll @fyoyacanruinmylifethanks @nightmare-light @rirk-ke @miyakiyo0mi @whorefordazai @rirk-ke @cross-crye @alohablue

[dreamkidddream]

Hello! Congrats!! Well deserved omg! Could you write the quote number 8 for Kunikida please? This man deserves so much more love! (but if it's already taken, then quote number 5) Take care! <3

Thank you!!! I hope you’re staying safe and doing well ☺️ Kunikida deserves so much more love than he gets and I will forever stand by that (there will be NO Kunikida slander here 😤😤) and this was so cute. Reader is gender neutral!

TW: small spicy/suggestive mention, but it’s nothing graphic or extreme (literally just one small mention of undressing, but nothing graphic)

Prompt: “Is that my shirt?” with Kunikida!

You cannot remember anything from last night.

Okay maybe you’re exaggerating just a bit, but you can’t remember the whole night. You remember celebrating a case well done at the agency, having more than just a few drinks, and then the night became blurry after that.

So waking up in a room that isn’t yours, in a bed that isn’t yours, just about gave you a heart attack. But, you didn’t wake up next to someone, and you still had your same clothes on, so you felt somewhat relieved. You weren’t handcuffed, and you still had all of your limbs intact, and the room wasn’t a dungeon or someone’s basement, so that was a plus sign.

The room looked rather plain, not much hanging on the walls and only having the bare necessities in there. You can see a nightstand, a decent sized TV, along with a bookcase filled with different sized novels and textbooks. When you did get up (really when your head stopped spinning) to take a closer look, you could also see...notebooks?

You picked one up, really focusing on it, and now that you’re up close, these look like the ones that Kunikida use-

Oh no.

Oh nonononono-

This is Kunkida’s room? You’re at his place?! Oh, you could just pass out right now, and you would have crawled back in bed and go back to sleep if it was your bed and not his! Oh, this is just mortifying-

A knock on the door resounded in the room

“(Y/N)? Are you awake yet?”

You choked on your spit, and dropped the notebook, the thud echoing in the room. Damnit!

You heard him sigh through the door, just picturing the irritation growing on his face. “I’m assuming that you are. Well make yourself decent and come out. We have some things that we need to discuss.”

You wanted to bang your head on the wall, but you know that it would just prolong confronting him (and make your headache worse). You couldn’t hide in there forever, but after catching a huge stain of whatever on your shirt, you would feel even more embarrassing going out there with it on (not to mention that you look and feel absolutely filthy, you wanted a shower more than anything!). So, you just so happened to fall upon a black dress shirt that was neatly folded on the nightstand next to you, you took the initiative and changed into it.

Did Kunikida purposely leave that out for you? You assumed so, you know how organized the man is, and it wouldn’t make sense why he would just leave it out if he didn’t. You won’t lie, the action made your heart flutter (even more than it already does when you’re around him), and you felt a little giddy knowing that you could wear one of his shirts, despite under the current circumstances.

You still had your bottoms on, which were left unscathed and clean somehow, and you took a breath.

You couldn’t hide forever, and with that, you opened the door.

—-

The first thing your eyes landed on was Kunikida already dressed, furiously writing in his notebook, glasses perched on top of his head, pacing back and forth while mumbling to himself. You took the time to scan his apartment, being just as plain as him room but still having a type of charm to it (a charm that only Kunikida can have). It wasn’t until you cleared your throat that he froze. He snapped his head up at you, and you just mentally prepared yourself for getting chewed out.

“Well, glad to see that you’re finally up. Have a seat”, he lead you to sit at his kitchen table, him pulling a chair out for you and taking a seat across. “How’s your head?”

“Oh it’s...fine?”

“Are you sure?”

Okay, he’s not fussing at you yet, which is a good sign. The tension that you felt in your body slowly started to ease away, your shoulders being relaxed again.

“Yeah. If anything, my throat’s a little dry-”

“Because I would think after acting like a reckless party animal with no self control would leave your head anything but fine.”

Oop, you spoke too soon.

“Do you have any idea to how you acted last night?! In front of the President no less!”

“Erm, uh-”

“I would expect this from morons like Dazai but not from you! Not to mention how much you could have been put in danger if I wasn’t there!”

While he’s disciplining you like a parent would to a young child, you just pretty much sit there and take it. You somewhat deserve it, you probably messed up his schedule that he meticulously wrote in his notebook. So you’ll listen, but at the same time, you could only take your stomach growling so much, and you wouldn’t mind having at least a glass of water-

“And another thing! What if you would have gotten alcohol poisoning?! You’re old enough to control- wait.” He leaned closer, his green-gray eyes glistening in the sun rays peeking through his blinds.

“Is-is that my shirt?”

“Huh? Oh...yeah?”

His eyes widened, then he went quiet. He promptly leaned back into his seat and coughed in his hand, which is conveniently trying to cover the red dying his face (and failing).

“Just-just be careful next time. I’ll get started on breakfast.”

Whatever thought he had stopped at the tip of his tongue, and he got up from the table, leaving you somewhat confused. Maybe you weren’t suppose to wear the shirt like you thought...

So you got up too, and starting making your way back into his room to your discarded shirt. “Hey, if it makes you uncomfortable, I’ll change back into my-”

“N-NO! I mean- don’t worry about it. I-I don’t mind. I know your clothes aren’t clean, and I’ll take you home after so that you can get properly changed.”

You didn’t believe him. He couldn’t even look you in the eyes, how can you? Even looking at him from over here, you can see how red his ears are. But, maybe he wasn’t used to this? Your heart would be racing too if the roles were reversed. While handling a drunk Kunikida made you chuckle, you really appreciated his efforts. He dealt with all your antics while you were drunk, gave you his own bed to sleep in while he bunked on his own couch, and now he’s even cooking you breakfast. And he didn’t have to do any of that!

This man is a keeper, you swear.

So you have to repay him back somehow, and you will. You hugged him from behind before he could say anything, and gave him a peck on his cheek (or that’s what you were aiming for, but ended up kissing behind his ear).

“Thank you, Kunikida”, your voice was muffled from hiding your face in his back, but the message still got across. “I really do mean it. Thanks.”

He practically short circuited, words jumbling together to form some type of “you’re welcome”. Stepping back, you gave him a smile and offered to help with breakfast, which lead him to sending you to the bathroom to clean up a little more (which you reasoned was to help get himself together and not look like a bumbling fool in front of you).

Kunikida watched you walk from the corner of his eyes, hiding his own smile from you.

Bonus:

“So, how come you didn’t just take me home? I can’t imagine how annoying I probably was last night. Scratch that, I can”, you chewed on pancakes, happy that your stomach and throat were finally satisfied.

“Well, I did, but you left your keys at the agency, and thought we were playing ‘I Spy’ when I kept asking you where the spare was when we got to your apartment.”

“Oh...yikes. Well, thanks for letting me crash here, and letting me borrow your shirt. It’s really comfy too!”

He cleared his throat, “It’s not a problem. Just be more responsible next time you’re drinking, I’m not your personal babysitter you know!”

You just laughed and nodded your head, cheeks full of food.

Kunikida didn’t lie, you really did leave your keys at the office, but he didn’t have it in him to tell you that he was fine with that. He didn’t feel okay leaving you by yourself at all last night. You didn’t stay in a bad part of town necessarily, but what if he left and you forgot to lock the door, and someone walked in behind him? Not to mention the killer hangover you would have to face when you woke up.

He remembers that you always say that you trust him with your life, so he took you to his place, fed you some food, washed your face, and laid you on his bed (all the while you acted like a clingy kid, refusing to let him go the whole time).

He took out his shirt with the intent to change, but decided against it. He didn’t want you to wake up and think you got taken advantage of, that he’s some kind of creep!

Plus, he only wanted to undress you when you two are actually together and reach that point in your relationship, not while you’re in this state, even if it’s to do something as innocent as changing your dirty shirt.

So he just tossed it aside, tucked you in, and admired you from the door once everything was done. Sleeping on the couch wasn’t very ideal, but he’s fine with it if it means that you’ll be safe and comfortable in his bed.

He would do anything for you, and while he may complain, if it means that you’re safe and happy, then he’ll make sure that it gets done.

[imgoingtohellsofuckit]

Not The One For You

Rodrick x Reader

Warning - Smut (don’t be too hard on it )

Summary - Rodrick’s parents don’t like you so you are having dinner with them to change their mind

Rodrick Heffley wasn't the brightest kid. It was pretty much universally known. So when you told your friends that you were dating the wannabe rock star. It's not like you two were that different. You liked the same music, both had an alternative style, both of you were older siblings, had families who only saw reasons to be disappointed in you. On the outside you two getting together seemed to make a lot a sense. However there were a lot of differences that your friends decided to focus on. Specifically that you were actually really smart and wanted a life that was normal. Well halfway normal. You were excited to keep the alt style but you wanted an actual job. Granted you were trying to be a mortician but still. You wanted the job, the house, the family and well Rodrick wanted the fame and the glory of being a musician.

"You guys are acting like me dating him now means I'm going to spend the rest of my life with him," You point out, "we are 17.... the only thing we know is that we like each other right now."

"Yeah but it's Rodrick," One of them points out, "he's incapable of taking care of himself. This is gonna be your life."

"Exactly! I mean what if you do end up getting like married?"

"Then I handle it then," You answer, "you are looking way too deep into this. We are just dating."

"Babe you ready?" Rodrick calls over.  You look back to see him a little bit down the hall from the circle of girls gathered around my locker.

"Of course Rod," You say as you shut the locker leaving your friends behind as you meet your boyfriend. He drapes his arm around you with a big smirk. Moving to plant a soft kiss on your forehead. My friends weren't the only ones who have problems with us. Rodrick's parents also found a lot to not like in our relationship. First of all Rodrick's mother is well- controlling to say the least. She saw another person in his life dressed in chains and all black, so she decided that I was just like the other people he hangs around with. Ignoring all the parts about me that aren't just my style. And whatever feelings about me his dad had all turned negative when Rodrick forgot to lock his bedroom door and his mom walked in.

"How was your day beautiful?" he asks as we head out to his van.

"It was slow- my calc teacher was riding my ass," You tell him, "deadass he wouldn't leave me alone. He sent me to the office for my outfit and they sent me back saying that it wasn't agaisnt dress code- because it isn't. And this mother fucker looks me dead in the eye and says- 'well if you didn't dress like a hooker I'd feel comfortable teaching you' which is like first off what the fuck."

"Thats gross- did you report him to the office?" Rodrick asks, "do I need to kick his ass?"

"I reported him and I called my mom- who by the way apparently is still on the phone with the principal," You say chuckling lightly, "and no you don't have to kick his ass- mostly because if you did.... you wouldn't win."

"Oh I totally could," He says, "I'm strong as hell."

"uH Rodrick babe I love you but he's the football coach and weighs 300 pounds," You say trying to explain it to him, "you'd get crushed. I still love you tho."

"I'm upset- I could kick his ass.... especially if he's being gross to you," Rodrick says. You nod unconvinced.

"How was your day?" You ask him.

"Boring - however I appreciated the pickup lines during history," He says, "it was cute..."

"I was gonna send my tittes but then I remembered your mom still reads your messages," You say smirking.

"Oh I missed out," He says, "think we can make a detour for a quicky in the car?"

"Your mom wants us there early," You remind him, "plus she's still on the fence about us being alone since she caught us in your room." He rolls his eyes lightly as we climb into his van.

"Yeah but let's say we make a detour to the store hookup in the back of the van and then grab some flowers or something for her to make it seem like we stopped for her," Rodrick suggests, "or maybe like a cake or something. To ya know show the peace..."

"Fine but you'd have to be quick," You tell him, "and you better tell me that your van is clean back there. Last time I got pizza in my hair."

"Clean... no it's not clean," He says, "but I brought a blanket and we can like spread it over the back... It'll be  fine..."

"Fine but the second I touch rotting food it's over," You say firmly. He smirks as he changes the course towards the store just up the street. He makes sure to get in the back line of the parking spots taking the furthest one from the store. He climbs in the back first shoving the trash around the back. The finally throws the blanket down across the back.

"Just like imagine rose petals and a bed and shit," He says. It's quite literally the opposite of the romance that I'd prefer but he's a giant punk dumbass so you have no idea why you would of thought this would be any different.  He sits down and looks at you with a goofy smile. "Malady would you like to join me?" You chuckle before climbing back to join him. The second you get back there he already starts yanking off his shirt. Way too excitedly for his own good. You smile as you move to pull off your layers. Finally as you both get to your underwear he looks at you excitedly. "You're so hot."

"Awe thanks cutie," You say as you climb on his lap moving to meet his lips. His hands fall to your waist. Holding on as you take full control of the situation. You can feel the excitement coursing through him. You chuckle lightly. You move to pull his member free from his boxers. The moving your own underwear to sink down onto his member. He lets out a loud moan as I set the slow pace.

"Mmm you're amazing," He says softly. You chuckle as you quicken the pace. Soft moans filling the car. You can tell you both are moving way more than you thought you would. Anyone on the outside would know automatically what was happening. All you can hope for is no one relaying the information back to Rodrick's mother. "Uhh baby," He moans loudly. You move pulling him into a deep kiss. Feeling the moans through the kiss. You can tell he's not gonna last much longer. You move laying back allowing him to take control. He smirks widely and starts at his assault. The moans filling the van. Echoing off the metal walls. Finally he pulls out. Spilling his load on your legs. "Did you?"

"No not yet," You say slightly annoyed at him finishing before you. He nods pulling your legs on his shoulders. Pulling you towards him. He latches his mouth on your clit trying his best to get you off. He's sloppy. But even the sloppiest technique when your this close could send you way over the edge. Your hand moves over your mouth as you come upon. Stifling the loud moans as you cum. He doesn't stop. He keeps going. Your body feels so good you could scream. He pulls away after a minute catching his breath.  "Come here," You demand. He complies clearly excited to see you like this. You move getting on your hands and knees. He looks like he's about to scream at the sight. He moves pushing himself in with out warning. Pounding into you as fast as he could.

"Mmmm I love you so much," He groans.

"I love you too Rod but please go faster," You moan. He complies. The van was filled with a pure moaning mess. "Oh Rod I'm gonna cum again." You can barely finish the words as you hit your second orgasm. He pulls out as you simply lay down on the blanket.

"Holy fuck," He says as he lays down beside you.

"Fuck Rodrick," You say softly, "we have to go see your parents after this."

"Yeah I guess we kinda went a little too hard," He says softly, "and we still have to actually get flowers or something."

"Ughh think you can manage that?" You ask, "I'm gonna go get cleaned up."

"Yeah what kind?" He asks.

"I don't care get something thats pretty but not a million dollars," You say as you sit up pulling your underwear back on. He nods as he follows suit in pulling on his own clothes. Once you both are fully dressed you climb out of the van. He takes your hand genteelly.

"You're beautiful you know that," He says smiling at you. You move pecking his cheek.

"Thanks Rod."

Once inside the store the two of you split up. You head to the bathroom to clean yourself up. Fixing you makeup and hair. Trying to make the whole thing less obvious. You meet him back at the entrance. He's holding two sets of flowers.

"Rodrick I know you're bad at math but I know you can at least count to thirty," You say chuckling.

"Actually I got these daisies for my mom," He says, "and these roses are for you." He hands the bouquet over to you. You take them with a big grateful smile. Moving in to pull him into a quick kiss. As you pull back he moves draping his arm around your shoulders. "Come on beautiful." As you both make your way to his van you can't help but smile. Sure he's not the most romantic boyfriend- he did just fuck you in the back of his disgusting van and instead of cleaning it to do so he threw a blanket over rotting food and old condoms. But the small gestures like the roses and the compliments. Really just prove that he's not as bad of a boyfriend as everyone thinks he is.

It doesn't take us long for you guys to reach his house. He holds your hand as he leads you both into the house.

"Rodrick is that you?" His mom calls.

"Yeah mom!" Rodrick yells back. His mom moves from the kitchen over to the doorway. She looks over us.

"Rodrick it is a 5 minute drive from the school to the house why did it take you almost an hour?" She asks him clearly not happy with you both. You smile nervously as you hand her the flowers. This dinner was my chance to fix the fact his parents didn't like me. And getting railed by their son right before this interaction was very much hurting my chances of this going well.

"We had to go to my mom's shop real quick then we picked up these flowers," You tell her, "sorry my fault. My mom wanted me to bring her a coffee." Her expression softens.

"Awe well thank you," She says, "how was your day Y/n?"

"Oh it was good," You tell her, "very productive."

"That's good! Here come with me I want you to taste this sauce for the pasta," She says brightly, "it's a new recipe." She starts moving off to the kitchen. Rodrick gives you a slightly impressed look before leading you both into the kitchen.

The rest of the dinner actually goes really well. Rodrick's mother despite her reserves after catching you and Rodrick seems to finally have forgiven you. Letting go of the stupid blame she had for you "corrupting her son" or whatever garbage she went on about.

"I hope Rodrick is being a gentleman," Mrs. Heffley says to you.

"Oh he is," You tell her, "he got me roses today. And he's always opening doors for me. Making sure to sent me good morning texts. He's actually a really good boyfriend." He smiles at you. You tighten your grip on his hand. She looks pleased with his answer. Greg starts to make a snarky comment but his brother kicks him from under the table.  

"That's good, I'm proud of you Rodrick," His mother says. His father looks between you and his son. Not completely convinced his son would act like anything other than the slob he knows.

"We are talking about this Rodrick right?" His father asks.

"Yeah actually," You say, "I know it might be hard to believe- I didn't believe it at first."

"What's so hard to believe about it?" Rodrick asks, "she's my girl and I want to make her happy-" The sweet words ending in a loud burp. Both of his parents sigh loudly. You simply chuckle. He looks over to you with a big smile. Then moves pecking your forehead.

"Yeah she's perfect for you Rodrick," Greg says, "anyone who can handle that- you better keep her around."

"Can it nerd," Rodrick says harshly.

"So what are you planning to do after school?" Mrs. Heffley asks you.

"I'm planning to go to school and studying mortuary science," You explain, "Mortician's are a job that's always gonna be there... And it helps that my grandmothers a mortician and is hiring me on her staff when I meet the requirements to join." She nods along to your words.

"Oh so you want a real job," His father says, "hmm Rodrick you could try that some time."

"No thanks old man," Rodrick says, "I'd rather stick something that actually matters. Like music... Not that I think your ambitions don't matter Y/n."

"No I understand," You tell him, "you have your dream and I have mine." You look to his parents. "Real jobs are relative... society is changing and becoming things like musicians and influencers is a lot easier than it was before." His mother chuckles nervously. You know that they have this thing against Rodrick's music. However you also know you want to support your boyfriend way more than you want his parents to like you. "I believe that Rodrick will do great in his music career...."

"Awe thanks babe-"

"If he works for it," You continue, "the music industry is hard and you have to stand out. I'm sure he'll get there but it'll take a lot of work."

"That's well put," His father says.

"She's very insightful," Rodrick says, "right babe?" You chuckle lightly. His mother looks back to you.

"So where is this school your looking at?" She asks you, "is it local? Or are you going away?"

"Oh it's local actually," You explain, "the next town over really but it's like a 20 minute drive." She nods. You give her a soft smile. "It's just a small college. I told Rodrick to check it out. They have a music production course which is apparently really nice."

"I've looked into it," Rodrick says, "and I don't know if school is for me... Considering I barely go when it's free I don't know if I want to pay to skip school all the time."

"You wouldn't be paying for all of it," His dad says, "if you actually go I might help... but you'd have to stay enrolled." Rodrick scoffs.

"School doesn't have to be for you Rod," You say to him, "but it's worth a look ya know. Maybe even a tour. You don't have to decide right now."

"Fine I'll tour it," He says, "we can tour together."

"Did she just get Rodrick to agree to tour a college?" His father asks in disbelief, "this isn't real?"

"Shhh don't say anything he might change his mind," His mother says quietly. Rodrick stabs at his pasta. He takes his last bite and then looks to his parents.

"I'm gonna drive her home," Rodrick says, "we'll probably stop to get something sweet on the way. That good?"

"Yeah of course," His mom says, "it was lovely seeing you Y/n."

"You as well Mrs. and Mr. Heffley, I hope I see you again soon," You say to them.

"Oh well how about you come to Grandpa Heffley's birthday party," Mrs. Heffley offers, "it'll be here and I'm sure the family would love to meet you... And you and Rodrick have been dating for a little bit now so I'm sure they'd love to see more than just the pictures you and Rodrick post online."

"Is that okay with you Rodrick?" You ask him.

"Sure it'll make it a lot less boring," Rodrick says, "can we head out now?"

"Yes Rodrick," His mother says clearly not loving his attitude. You wave to them as you stand. Rodrick leads you both out to his van.

"You sure that it's okay?" You ask, "If you don't want to then I don't have to go."

"It's literally fine," He says as you both get into his van, "honestly if you're there I'll actually have someone who likes me there." He gives you a smile. "I'd love it if you'd go."

"Then I'll go," You tell him, "it's nice that your parents seem to like me again."

"Yeah now I can have you over without my mom making us sit downstairs," Rodrick says, "and I don't have to hear the whole- 'are you sure about y/n?' speeches now." You chuckles.

"That's good," You say, "I love how your parents didn't like me but my mom adores you."

"Oh yeah I know," He says, "not the way I pictured that going honestly. I was afraid your mom would hate me."

"No she loves you!" You exclaim, "she thinks it's good that I'm with someone who likes to have fun... something about how I don't do that enough. And my grandma thinks you're funny."

"You're grandpa doesn't like me," Rodrick points out.

"Yeah well he doesn't really like me either," You add, "he's against anything that's different. I mean he's still harassing my mom about having two kids out of wedlock so there wasn't any hope for you babe."

"Didn't he want you to have like a chasty belt?"

"No he bought me a purity ring," You correct, "I gave it back to him saying that I don't believe in waiting til marriage and he called his priest on me... Ooo if I wear that would your mom like me more?"

"I think after she caught us having sex a thing about being a forever virgin won't really mean much," He says, "even if its a religious thing." You shrug in response.

"I tried," You say, "so whats this sweet thing you want to get on the way to mine?"

"You," He says with a smirk, "your mom home?"

"Not for another hour," You say brightly.

"Good because I think I've still got more in me."

"You're a dog Rodrick."

"And you love it," He says with a smirk.

“I really do.”