#connect bts catharsis

[thepringlesofblood]

the vibe im getting from FHJY is that this is the season where they really lean into the high school aspect. that probably sounds bonkers since its called Fantasy High, but like. hear me out.

Freshman year, they come at high school from the "John Hughes" "80s teen movie trope" vibe, which is to say different from the real-world experience of high school.

it works great! operating in that frame of reference makes everything flow really well, and hits all the high-school-related-media notes in a very satisfying way while putting its own spin on it and not getting bogged down by the actual slog that is high school in reality.

there's still a lot of more modern inspo, but it stays in the kinda expectation-suspension-tropey area of how 80s movie high school works.

Sophomore year is spring break! I believe in you! They're not at school! They're on an adventure!

They lean into being a teenager and coming-of-age themes a lot (obvs), but the only big reference point to the institution of high school is that it'll be worth 60% of their grade.

A huge point, to be sure, and the exact kind of objectively unfair but somehow not against the rules shit that happens in high school, but not the main driving force of the season.

arthur aguefort also does a bunch of wack shit but it's more fantasy than it is high school although its a lot of both.

they lean into adventuring as a set career path much more, with the school giving money for hirelings and offering a basic incentive for other students to go, so that's a loose connection to the real-world career counseling high schools have, but again, not the main thing.

VERY Important though: we are now very much in the present. The viral shrimp party, livestreaming Kalina, online banking, the epic of Gorgug building a cell tower? this isn't john hughes 80s town anymore, this is now. (at least in Solace).

Junior year

almost everything in the trailer is about academia

we've got the cool doodles-in-the-margins style art and intro

in the interviews and BTS (so far), the cast have talked a lot about what they were like in high school (not the 80s)

and the precedent that The Seven set where the MacGuffin was getting their GED? It's time.

we're getting into what is actually hell about high school - the institution itself. the arbitrary standards that academia in the US holds, and how it leaves behind, punishes, and fails its students in its extremely important role of preparing them for life as an adult.

i could talk about this all day, but personally for me the quote from the trailer that shot me back to my junior year of high school was "You have perfect grades, and it still might not be enough for you to graduate"

riz's arc this season is shaping up to punch me in the academia trauma and personally i can't wait for the catharsis

Brennan has shown time and time again that he Gets and wants to tell stories about the ways in which the US education system affects, hurts, shapes, traumatizes, changes people, and how they survive and recover from it and make their own lives. I for one am so so ready to see that reflected with the bad kids.

[marblemoonstones]

🩵 catharsis ~ chapter four

main masterlist

series masterlist

pairing: bts ot7 x reader

genre: collegestudentreader!au 

warnings: ❗️any characters in the story have nothing to do with their real life counterparts❗️f reader, reader with glasses, reader gets yelled at briefly, use of word bitch

word count: ~4.4k

a/n: sorry everyone, it’s been a while! been busy, but i hope you enjoy reading 🤎

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………

The next couple weeks passed by in a blur, and before I knew it it was almost time for school to start up again. I’m going into my junior year at Seoul National University (sorry, super basic college) and am majoring in Education, as I want to be a teacher like Namjoon. But, unlike Namjoon, I don’t want to teach high schoolers. I want to be an elementary school teacher. (Sorry, I know it’s a pretty big time skip but I wanted to actually get to the college scenes lol)

The boys convinced me (more like begged me) to stay with them for school and said that “Your presence is payment enough!” (Minus Hoseok of course, as we’re still not on good terms for whatever reason) I finally relented after seeing the prices for dorms. Why were they so high for broke college students? Through these few weeks I have gotten to know the boys better.

Namjoon and I have gotten close because of our similarity in careers. We both are avid learners and want to help others learn and have bonded over many cups of tea. I know that I can go to him for any help with my schoolwork, and he says he will come to me for ideas because I am “younger and know what’s hip these days.” We also both love to read and have exchanged books frequently. He is more of a science fiction and fantasy type reader while I adore romance books (again, sorry if you don’t like these types of books). While I admit that his books are fascinating, I still prefer my cheesy, k-drama worthy books. There’s nothing better than us two sitting on my balcony reading all afternoon with some treats Jin or I baked.

Jin and I have become better friends through our cooking and baking. He is a master chef and much better than I will ever be, but it’s still fun to learn from him. It often makes me wonder why he is an actor and not a cook, but people can have more than one avid interest. My baking skills are modest at best, but I do still love to make different types of cookies as my mom taught me and to make cute mini lunchbox cakes for the boys to take to their work for a sweet treat. 

More often than not I catch Yoongi looking at my treats longingly so I make more and send them with him to work. He is especially fond of my coffee cookies as I found him secretly eating them as a midnight snack one night. Yoongi and I have a mutual understanding where if we both need to relax for second and just breathe, we’ll seek out each other. I sometimes sit in his studio, just zoning out and giving myself a minute. And he sometimes will come find me in my room and just lay down next to me as I continue watching my show. These moments make me feel content.

Times that I do not feel content are whenever I’m with Hoseok. I genuinely want to at least be acquaintances, but he seems to want to be enemies forever. I try to reach out but every time he ignores me. More often than not he finds some excuse to not be in the room with me. I know the boys have noticed, but they haven’t said anything to me about it. I can only hope that with time he and I will eventually be able to tolerate each other. 

With Jimin it has been a little harder to connect, but we eventually got to the point where we are now. While I’m not as close to him as the maknaes or even Yoongi, we still have a good bond. It all started when I asked if I could use the dance studio in the house (rich people, am I right?) for fun. I danced all through high school at a recreational studio and I enjoy it occasionally to keep me exercised. I was stretching when Jimin walked in and asked if he could watch. I was nervous at first but then once I got started I fell into my own world. Jimin applauded afterwards and I bowed, embarrassed. We both then danced together and that’s how our friendship started. 

My friendship with the youngest two grew during those couple of weeks. After the shopping trip they decided that we were now a ‘trio of trouble’ and that we were besties. I’ll admit, sometimes I did feel a bit like I was third-wheeling them but for the most part it was great to have genuine friends. Sure, I had friends but they were mostly college friends that I didn’t see outside of school. But with Tae and Kook I felt that I could truly be myself. Endless hours of binging movies, playing video games, and doing stupid challenges/dares kept me entertained until my first day back. 

Which is today. I’m not nervous, but I always get a small pit of dread in my stomach. I only have two classes today, Foundations of Education and Psychology (not me stealing these class names off a random college website haha). Foundations of Ed is in late morning, then I have a short break before Psych which is early afternoon. I have these classes three times a week, but they’re my only classes on those days. 

I roll out of bed and rub my eyes before grabbing my glasses groggily. I knock on Jungkook and I’s shared bathroom and don’t get a response so I turn the knob and no one’s in there. I know today is also Jungkook’s first day of senior year but I’m fairly certain that he has a class around the same time as me. I wonder why he’s not up yet? Knowing him he overslept. That boy needs to learn to get a better sleep schedule. I lock both connecting doors and then carefully place my glasses on the counter. After showering I hop out, put my glasses on (bad vision is a curse, and this author knows the struggle, trust me, but at least glasses/contacts exist) and after drying off I change. 

I put on jean shorts and a pink shirt, and after going into my bedroom I grab my backpack and double check that I have all of my supplies. A couple notebooks, binders, and of course a pencil pouch that’s all stocked up. Notebook paper as well as folders are also neatly lined up. I zip it up and then make my way downstairs. 

Namjoon, Hoseok, Jimin, and Yoongi are all at their respective jobs. Jin is taking a break from acting, so he’s mostly here and Taehyung has a shoot later in the afternoon so I know he is also around. 

Sure enough, Jin’s cooked me a ‘back to school breakfast,’ which is super sweet of him. 

“Thank you so much Jin! You really didn’t have to do this,” I say to him.

“Of course I did! It you and our maknae’s first day back so you deserve a special breakfast,” Jin replies. “Speaking of, where is the little brat? He shouldn’t be sleeping because he has to get ready and take you both to school!” 

“He’s still sleeping,” Taehyung says, walking down the stairs.

“Ugh, that kid will be the death of me. I’ll go get him. Eat up!” Jin goes upstairs, mumbling under his breath about how annoying Jungkook is.

I laugh, then sit down with Taehyung and start eating. Taehyung grins his boxy smile and says, “I wonder if Jungkookie will be late on his first day. If he is, I can take you to school.”

“I don’t think that Jin will let Kook be late,” I say, thinking of the father-like eldest.

“True. He’ll probably drag Jungkook by his hair if that means he gets up,” Taehyung says, laughing.

About ten minutes later a weary looking Jungkook and an irritated Jin come walking down the stairs.

“See, this is why you need to be more like y/n! She gets up on time and is actually prepared for school,” Jin scolds.

“Yeah yeah whatever hyung,” Jungkook says sleepily, sitting down at the table and eating a few bites of the now cold breakfast. 

“Don’t ‘whatever hyung’ me, you have to promise that whenever you have school you’ll actually be ready,” Jin says.

“Okay fine I promise. Y/n you ready to go?” Jungkook says, standing up from the table and going to get his shoes on.

“Yep,” I reply, going to put on my white converse.

“Bye! Have a good first day!” Jin and Taehyung say as we leave. 

Jungkook drives a nice sedan today instead of one of the rich luxurious cars they normally drive.

“Are you excited?” I ask Jungkook, “You’re almost done with school!”

“I’m excited to be done with it,” Jungkook agrees. We pull up and he parks then we get out and get ready to head to our respective classes. 

“Well have fun with your Foundations of Ed class. You don’t need a ride home after, right?” Jungkook asks me.

I shake my head. “Nope. I’m going to chill here through lunch until my Psych class then I’ll take the bus home.” 

“You know you can call any of us to take you home right? We wouldn’t mind,” Jungkook says. 

I know they wouldn’t care but I don’t want to bother them with me. 

“Oh, you’re all busy people so don’t worry about it! Here come some of your friends so I’d better go.” There are a couple guys and girls who are walking up to Jungkook. 

“Hey Jungkook!” 

“Good to see you bro!”

“How was your summer?” 

“Who’s this?”

The last question comes from a snobby looking girl. Her inky black hair is up in a high ponytail and she looks at me with disdain. 

“Oh, this is y/n. She’s the one who’s staying with me and the boys for a while,” Jungkook says, introducing me. 

“Hi y/n, I’m Felix.” He waves at me and I wave back.

“I’m Jackson,” says the next boy, grinning at me. 

“I’m Hwasa,” says the girl next to the snobby one. 

“And I’m Haneul,” says snobby girl. 

“Nice to me you all,” I say.

“So you’re the girl who’s too poor to stay at a dorm!” Haneul says sweetly.

“Haneul,” Felix says through gritted teeth, “That’s not true.”

“I’m sure it is though, Felix. Isn’t that right, y/n?” Haneul now has the biggest fake smile I’ve ever seen. 

“Oh, well I supposed so,” I say, deflated at the thought that the boys think I’m just a ‘girl who’s too poor to stay at a dorm.’

“Um, y/n that’s not what-“ Jungkook starts, sensing my change in mood.

“I’ve got to get to class! Bye everyone, it was nice meeting you.” I interrupt Jungkook. Turning on my heel, I swiftly walk away from the group, hearing Haneul whisper under her breath, “I told you she was poor.” 

I find my building and classroom and walk in. It’s a decently sized room with partner desks in neat rows. Some students are already sitting in desks chatting with each other.

I find a seat in the back right corner by the window so I can see outside. I can only hope no one will sit by me, but that seems to not be the case as a couple minutes later a tired looking boy asks if he can sit next to me. I say yes and he flops into the seat and lays his head on his arms. 

“Oh, by the way my name’s Seungmin,” he mumbles before closing his eyes.

I smile, amused at his tiredness and turn my attention to the professor as she walks in. 

“Good morning class and welcome to Foundations of Education. We will be learning the basics of education and teaching in this class. My name is Professor Shin. Now, let’s take roll.” As she starts calling names, I turn my attention to my sleeping deskmate. I wonder if I should wake him up? 

“Choi y/n?” 

“Here,” I say.

Eventually she gets to Seungmin. 

“Kim Seungmin?” 

I nudge his elbow but he doesn’t stir. Then I poke him. Hard. This makes his head shoot up and then sees everyone staring at him. 

“Oh, uh, here.” 

“Mr. Kim, if you could please refrain from sleeping in class that would be much appreciated,” Professor Shin says with an annoyed look on her face. She then continues on with attendance. 

“Hey, are you okay? You look super exhausted,” I say to Seungmin, seeing how his eyes are red and have dark circles underneath them. 

“I’m fine I just stayed up way too late last night,” he says.

I nod then turn back to the professor, who is now passing out a slyllabus. I take a deep breath then focus for the rest of the class.

After class I bid goodbye to a still sleepy Seungmin and head out to get lunch. There are picnic tables around campus so I grab something to eat then go sit at an empty one. I enjoy the breeze through my hair and the peacefulness of the trees. Until I see someone coming up to me out of the corner of my eye. I look and it’s Hwasa and Jackson. 

“Hey y/n, can we sit here?” She asks.

“Sure.” 

They sit and pull out their own lunches.

“We’re sorry about Haneul this morning,” Jackson says after chewing and swallowing, “She can be a bit…blunt sometimes.”

“Who’re we kidding Jackson, she’s blunt all of the time,” Hwasa says with an eye roll. 

I appreciate these two apologizing for their friend’s action and like them immediately. 

“You guys really don’t have to apologize. I mean, I am poor enough to not be able to afford a dorm,” I say.

“Even if it’s true, that doesn’t mean she needs to be so bitchy about it, and besides, dorms are expensive for anyone,” Hwasa points out.

“Can we not talk about Haneul now please? I’m trying to eat,” Jackson complains. Hwasa and I laugh and we change the subject to school and finish our lunches. 

“Thanks for letting us join you for lunch y/n,” Hwasa says as we clean up and throw away our trash. 

“Of course. It’s nice to meet some of Kook’s friends!” I say, genuinely glad to have made more friends.

“Aww, you called him Kook. Are you two super close? You can tell us. We’ve been his best friends for ages now,” Jackson says.

I want to trust them, so I reply “I guess you could say that. We definitely have gotten closer these past couple of weeks.” 

“Ooh, have you now?” I hear a horrible voice behind me. Of course it’s Haneul. 

“You see, you may have gotten closer to Jungkook but I’ve known him since he was little. No one knows him better than me,” Haneul says, trying to intimidate me. 

It’s true that I still know little about the boys’ background and upbringings, but I am still surprised that Jungkook would hang out with someone like Haneul. The boys also haven’t mentioned her at all.

“You only hung out because your parents were good friends with his,” Hwasa explains with yet another eye roll. 

“Are you jealous Haneul?” Jackson teases, enjoying the glare in Haneul’s eyes.

“No, of course not. Why would I be jealous of a stupid nobody like her?” 

Wow, straight to the point. I can try to ignore it, but I’m not sure if I can deal with another person hating me. Hoseok is more than enough.

“Excuse me, I need to get to my next class.” I leave as gracefully as I can but my body still reacts to her calling me stupid. I take a deep breath and try to calm my shaking hands and racing heart. Eventually I am calm enough to walk into my next class, but my hands still tremble. 

I step into my Psychology hall, a big airy room made for a lot of students. There’s only a couple people in there as I am early because I was escaping from Haneul. 

I take a seat near the middle because I want to be able to see the board. Soon the hall starts filling up with students. A girl sits to my left and eventually a guys sits on my right. Neither of them look at me and continue to talk to their friends around them. 

The professor comes in, a kind looking man. He introduces himself as Professor Kim (so many Kims) and starts to talk. The class goes by quickly and then I’m free. First day of school done. I make my way out of the crowded hall and back into the sunlight. I check my phone and see that I have a couple missed text from Jungkook.

I’m sorry that Haneul said those things. I know ur not poor and I apologize for her words.

Y/n? Ur probably in class, but I just wanted to remind u that any of us would be happy to take u home after ur last class.

I smile at his Haneul text, but text him back to tell him that no one has to take me home.

I’m a big girl Kook, I can take myself home. But thanks :) 

I am about to round the corner of the building when I hear Haneul talking. I stop when I hear that she’s talking about me. 

“Honestly y/n probably just wants the boys money. She’s just a gold digger that acted all pitiful and the boys are too sweet to say no to her. I feel bad for her because as soon as the boys figure this out she’s going to be kicked out of their house. Actually that’ll be super funny!” 

I hear tittering laughter and turn around to go the other way, eyes slightly glassy. Is this what everyone thinks? That I’m a gold digger? If they think that, then I won’t accept anymore gifts from the boys. Them letting me stay is more than enough and I don’t want them to hear these rumors because it will impact their reputation. 

I blink the tears away and then continue to the bus stop. I check my phone to see that Jungkook has texted me again. 

Look, I know u can handle urself but I don’t want anything happening to u. Hobi-hyung is free now and I sent him to pick you up. Just this once bc it’s the first day ok? :) 

Great. I can’t let Hoseok see me like this. I sniff then blink and make sure I look okay before seeing a car pull up that has Hoseok in the driver’s seat. I text Jungkook back.

Ok just this once but no more after today Kook 

I go up to the car and open the passenger door, climbing in to a stoic Hoseok.

“Hi Hoseok. Thanks for picking me up. You don’t ever have to do this again. I told Jungkook I will be taking the bus for the rest of the year.”

“That kid didn’t even think that I have dance today, so I’m taking you to my studio. We can then go home together afterwards with Jimin,” Hoseok says with his usual coldness.

Oh boy. Going to his work? This is great. Just great.

The rest of the car ride is silent except for the light music of the radio. 

We pull up to a modern looking building that says Epiphany. I get out and follow Hoseok inside. The receptionist greets us and then Hoseok tells me to wait out here.

“My class ends in an hour and so does Jimin’s. We’ll leave after that so just wait here patiently.” He then leaves and I’m left to sit in the rather comfy chairs. The receptionist smiles at me and tells me to tell her if I need anything. 

There are two big glass windows and I can see into the studios. I see Jimin in one of them, leading stretches to younger looking children. I smile as they talk and laugh while doing their splits. I look to the other one and there’s Hoseok leading some college looking dancers in stretches too. 

The front door swings open and in walks none other than Hwasa and Haneul. 

“Oh my gosh, we’re late! Let’s go before Hobi kills us!” Hwasa says hurriedly, rushing to the studio with Hoseok in it. “Hi y/n!” She calls as she darts last me. 

Haneul is in less than a rush than Hwasa. “Oh hello y/n. What are you doing here? Surely you aren’t here for class? Only the best of the best come here.” 

“I’m just waiting for Hoseok and Jimin to finish their classes,” I say, trying to be polite even though I heard her hurtful words earlier. 

“Oh you can’t even drive? That’s rough. Or is it that you don’t have a car?” Haneul asks with a look of pity on her face.

“I can drive perfectly fine, but I don’t have a car as of right now. Anyways, aren’t you late to your class?” I ask as nicely as I can.

“Oh yeah, guess I’d better head there. Have fun sitting!” Haneul bounces away and I sigh. She’s everywhere, so I guess I better get used to her and her rude words. 

I turn my attention back to Jimin’s class. He’s leading the kids through the five ballet positions, walking around and fixing their legs and arms. His cheerful and encouraging smile makes me smile, and I can feel my heart flutter a bit. But, just as every time before, I push it away and remind myself that the boys are off limits. They all have each other and are happy. You’re just going after the first attractive people that you see y/n. And it just so happens to be your housemates. I can’t help that these are the kindest and most beautiful boys I’ve ever seen. They’re strictly friends to me and will stay that way. 

I look at Hoseok’s class, seeing that they’re now done warming up and move on to dancing hip-hop and free styling. While most of the class is good, my eye is drawn to Hoseok. This makes sense, as he is the teacher, but for some reason I can’t tear my eyes away. He looks up as he’s dancing and our eyes lock on each other. I quickly look away, my cheeks burning as he probably doesn’t like me staring at him. But then I see that his eyes are turned away too, and there is a hint of a blush on his cheeks. Or it could just be that he’s tired and sweaty from dancing. 

After both classes finish, I stand and stretch my arms from sitting for an hour. Hwasa comes out of the locker room and asks me, “What did you think? Were you impressed by my amazing dance skills?” 

I laugh and reply, “Yes of course. I didn’t know that you could dance like that!”

“Well, there’s a lot of things you don’t know,” Hwasa teases, “Like how you don’t know that Hobi was staring at you during class?” 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about!” I say, dropping my voice to a whisper-yell, “He wasn’t looking at me! He hates me! And he’s dating six other boys!”

“Whatever they all like girls too…Unfortunately I have to go now, but give me your number and text me if any updates happen!” Hwasa swiftly grabs my phone and types her number in it, winks, and then saunters out. 

That girl! Thinking Hoseok was staring at me…that’s ridiculous. She’s crazy. But I think that we’re starting a great friendship. And the boys also like girls? That’s new to me.

“Hi y/n! What did you think of our class?” That awful voice again. Haneul.

I force a smile before saying, “It was great! You all are so talented.” 

“Why, thank you. I like to think so. I’m sure you’re good at something, right? Even poor people have some��use in this world.” 

This girl. Honestly, if poor is the worst insult that she can come up with, it could be much worse.

“Look, Haneul-“

“Did you just call y/n poor?” A voice behind us asks. We both look to see Hoseok, standing with his arms crossed and a duffel bag slung over his shoulder. 

Haneul smirks, and I know that she is thinking that Hoseok is going to agree with her. She’s probably right.

“Yes, I did call y/n poor. I mean, come on Hobi, we all know that she’s just leeching off of the boys and your money and that-“

“Haneul, even if I don’t particularly like someone that doesn’t mean I talk bad about them and call them names to their face and behind the back. That’s just rude. Don’t be a bitch.” 

Haneul is shocked and storms out of the studio. 

I turn to Hoseok to thank him. 

“Thanks Hoseok. I really appreciate it, and I’m sorry-“

“Stop apologizing. No one deserves to be bullied by others,” he says bluntly. 

“Look, can I just ask you one question? Why do you hate me?” I burst out, frustrated because he defended me but still is coldly talking to me.

“I don’t hate you. I just don’t like change,” Hoseok says, sighing. 

“Okay, well I just wish that you would’ve told me beforehand. I’m sorry for being change in your life and-“

“God y/n! Stop apologizing!” Hoseok shouts. I avert my eyes to the ground, as this is my usual tactic when someone yells at me. I try not to think of my ex. 

I hear Hoseok apologize, low and slow. 

Then he says, quieter, “Look, I don’t hate you and I wish that you would stop apologizing for things that aren’t your fault. Let’s get this out of the way; we may not like each other but let’s try to get along for the boys’ sake. Does that sound okay?” 

I take a deep breath and nod. 

“Sure, Hoseok.”

He does a small smile for the first time at me and holds out his hand. 

“Getting along?”

I shake it. 

“Getting along.”

a/n: i was going to write more, but i thought it was better to end here! looks like y/n and hobi are finally going to maybe get along! what do you think of haneul? and stray kids, hwasa, and jackson cameo! much love y’all. have an amazing day or night wherever you are 🫶🏼🩷

[fleet-off]

hi fleet!! for fic writer asks, 💫🎀💋💌

oh gosh! I'm not actually playing this ask game, I just reblogged one of Cookie @snickerdoodlles 's answers lol--but since you ask, anon, I will answer! Gonna take these mildly out of order.

💌 share something with us about an up-and-coming work (WIP) that has you excited!

I've been having a lot of thoughts lately about Vegas getting off to super mundane things re: Pete. The moment his body has the energy, this man is getting hard at the drop of a hat, you know? He's discovering kinks he didn't realize could be kinks. One morning he's in the closet rifling through Pete's checkered tops, all mixed in amongst his own silks and velvets—finds himself thinking about the ways they've blended, the mesh of their lives draping together to form one whole here in this home that belongs to both of them—and suddenly he's half-mast like a fucking teenager. Pete isn't even home. (It'd be embarrassing except it's Pete, and it would be weirder not to get chubbed up watching him gargle his mouthwash before bed. His cheeks are ballooned out and he's making funny shapes with his eyebrows and everything. Vegas wants to be the spit in his mouth.) Anyway. I've been funneling my feelings about Vegas's mundane obsessive obscene interests into my unusual dirty talk WIP, because the underlying desire in all of this is "can I weave my way into all the private quiet little pieces of you, can I be a part of you and you a part of me?" It's been a blast to write!

💫 what is your favorite kind of comment/feedback?

Truly any comment makes me very happy, but the comments that reflect moments of connection stick with me for a long time. When someone expresses how they related to an element of the story (e.g. "Death scares me, but this story didn't") or mentions rereading--I recognize what that means, and I feel so grateful to have intersected with another person's heart even in passing. Likewise, analysis and commentary are such expressions of connection and love for a work, with the bonus that I get to go feral in the response! If you come to me with parallels or symbolism, I will kiss you very tenderly on the mouth (and probably drop some BTS deets).

🎀give yourself a compliment about your own writing.

Ai...okay, I'll try. 😅 Most of my stories are about the whole "learning to live, learning to exist as people" thing, which means they're ultimately an exercise in catharsis. I think I make that catharsis feel earned and worthwhile.

💋when you leave comments on a fic, do you want to hear back from the writer?

I have no expectations there. I love the connections I've made through comment conversations, but there are so many reasons a writer might not respond to comments (and honestly, writers don't owe a reason at all). Why lay unnecessary extra pressure on someone's shoulders? she says, absolutely pressuring herself about taking too long to answer the comments on her own fics...

Thanks for the ask, anon! I wasn't playing the ask game, but I did have fun answering these. :)

[the-sooptudio]

Thoughts on the thematic narrative connections between Face and Layover:

I gave Face a good re-listen after Rainy Days dropped with so many allusions to pet names in the mv (Blue also has connotations) and there’s at least some merit to the two albums having a connecting thread.

Face begins with the end of a deceitful relationship, fueling feelings of depression and self-depreciation. This depression is exacerbated by a hectic work schedule which drives the artist to seek escape in drink (Interlude: Dive) The film Like Crazy is about an ambiguous relationship, and the lines included in the track have one character trying to cement a relationship while the other pulls away out of fear of losing everything. The song goes on to narrate how the artist decides to lose himself in clubs and liquor to numb himself and avoid having to face his reality. But after the club closes he finds himself alone again. The big closing number, Set Me Free pt. 2, finds the artist reaching a catharsis point where he no longer cares what outside forces think and he’s ready to face—if not the world then at least himself—with the truths he’s learned about himself and a renewed self-confidence.

Layover is a classic album of longing for something that has been lost and could be about anyone, but the artist here makes some very pointed allusions to publicly made pet names in the lyrics and mv for Rainy Days (the little prince, four-leaf clover, alien) which bring into question who this album is really about. [The title Blue also may hold some connotations as both one of Jimin’s favorite colors and the color both of them picked to represent their relationship in an interview questionnaire. Blue mold (penicillium) is also how Jimin is saved in Taehyung’s contacts.] The lyrics “Let me make up for all the time we lost/We can start again, open all the doors” may hint at an ambiguous relationship that the artist wishes to solidify with a new sense of honesty (and perhaps some publicity depending on if the hints he’s dropping are truly hints)

Overall, Layover is an album about someone reaching out to rebuild a relationship and ultimately waiting for the other person to work through their feelings (For Us). Face is about pulling away out of fear of losing everything and spiraling until one confronts themself with honesty (Set Me Free pt. 2).

End note: I don’t consider myself to be a serious shipper, but I am a fan of lyric/mv analysis and especially queercoding, which bts is well known for in general. The members have always been very deliberate with their lyric choices and at this point in their careers likely have input into their mv concepts as well. The music videos for Like Crazy and Rainy Days seem to be telling two sides of the same story.

[bookishtheories]

Map of the Soul: 7 CONNECT, BTS Explored: LONDON (CATHARSIS by Jakob Kudsk Steensen)

[voxyldy]

This was my favorite in the Connect series.

Credit: Bangtan TV / Big Hit Entertainment

[itmightrain]

"These are the kind of enriching interactions and exchange of ideas BTS craves,to be asked about their enormously diverse and profound discography and to explore more interesting subjects.I wish the interviewers can step up their damn game and not ask the same old stupid questions" - riseot7addict

See Catharsis here

[mydonkeyfeet]

This is so beautiful, like virtual reality forest bathing. Read about it above, then go and view it at catharsis.live. (There’s no BTS music, don’t worry. It’s just one of the many artworks that they sponsored as part of their worldwide free art project, Connect, BTS, with artists and exhibitions that complement their own philosophy. It’s all amazing, but Catharsis was the first one and you can view it  online too.) 

I wish I could see it live, where it’s huge and also has augmented reality things too.

[themoonispurple7]

since i saw a few posts on your blog regarding jk showing "signs", i thought I'd throw in my own 2 cents based on my own experience as an introvert close to his age, from a place that's not very progressive in terms of lgbtq+ and having had realisations about my own sexuality in my late teens.

i apologise in advance for the length. also a disclaimer that I'm very well aware that this might be pure projection since no one other than jk can confirm any of the following.

i read and write a lot. books and writing have always been my outlet, my catharsis, the way i best connect with myself and the world. because of that, a big part of my coming out experience began with seeking out books that explored sexuality because i needed to relate, to feel seen.

i know plenty of people who identify as straight that like and listen to troye sivan or other gay artists from where i am now, but that was not the norm when blue neighborhood came out.

i was lucky enough to come across troye because I'd just gotten my own phone, and access to social media without much monitoring. seeking out books regarding sexuality turned into seeking out spaces with people who were actually part of the community, which included coming across youtubers like connor franta, tyler oakley and (you guessed it) troye sivan.

basically, it wasn't a coincidence that i came across troye sivan at the time (2014). he simply was not a popular figure where i was from or in any of my immediate irl circles. and when i was listening to one direction and justin bieber my youtube algorithm definitely showed no sign of him.

even then, i wouldn't have known about the blue neighborhood (2015) if i hadn't come across hailey kiyoko's girls like girls mv suggested somewhere and then seen troye sivan's blue neighborhood 3 part video series recommended under it.

now, i don't know how popular troye was in SK, i have no idea if he'd have popped up in their algorithm - at least on YouTube, since the video leaves nothing to the imagination as to what the song is about. i did see someone say on here that Bang PD said in reply to RM's tweet - where he was recommending 'fools' - that he was the one who suggested the song to him. it's still interesting, though, i think.

but this is why jk's love for troye sivan made me think, and why i do give it some weight even if other members have also expressed interest in queer media. it's very interesting to me considering his age, his being an introvert, and the situation he lived in then - primarily with people around his age and supportive of lgbtq+ community, with a boss who recommends queer media.

now this is why i talked about how books with lgbtq+ characters mattered to me. I'm an introvert myself, and there's a certain isolation you're going to experience as one, usually because you need the time to recharge but also because you take your time to feel out the people around you before opening up. when you add questioning your sexuality while living in a largely traditional society, you're more likely to look for support in art and other things that consume you first as opposed to, say, other people. no matter how close they are.

as humans in general we love the art that reflects an aspect of us and for the most part "relatability" is an important factor in media. this is why the she-ra reboot made me and several other people cry, and wonder how things would have been if it had existed when we were younger. yes, a lot of people consume queer media, but queer people consume it differently, and that will be the case until it's completely normalised.

since music is to jk (and more recently, photography and videography) what books are to me and movies and shows are to others - his catharsis, his way of connecting to the world, i think it's understandable that he'd seek comfort in it.

also, to see that he makes a point - consciously or not - to have gender neutral lyrics in the songs he works on, to recommend and cover songs with gender neutral lyrics, to using either gender neutral songs or songs with he/him pronouns in his gcfs, it affirmed something for me.

yes, these could just be the actions of an ally, a way of showing sensitivity to their sizable lgbtq+ audience (because bts's music in general has increasingly been more gender neutral and they've also been consistently collaborating with artists who are out) but there's a deliberation to it (i feel). and i think it means something that he decided to use troye's song as the music for his first ever gcf.

if you got this far, thanks for reading! hope i made sense in what i was trying to say 😅. i guess my whole point is that jk being a fan of troye in general doesn't mean anything, but i do think the timing of the start of his fanboying coupled with how important music as a medium is to him MAY mean something and that's all I'm trying to say here.

of course, we'll never know until he actually tells us but I'm tired of people acting as if straight is the default and that it's absolutely out of the realm of possibility for jk to not be that.

i just know I'll love him and support him no matter what and i hope others will too.

Thank you so much for sharing this. There’s so much I wish I could say, but I’m honestly speechless. I’m really glad you had books, music, and writing when your community wasn’t as supportive. I know I already sound like a broken record but I think it’s so important to find the right authors and musicians at the right time.

Art can truly inspire us, comfort us, and save us in so many ways. I’m with you on that! I agree, the choices you’ve mentioned are very telling. And what you said about BTS collabing with musicians who were out is also really interesting - I honestly never thought of it that way!

[bts-trans]

[ENG] 200507 [CONNECT, BTS] Secret Docents of 'Catharsis' by SUGA, V & Jin @ London

@bangtansubs

[casspurrjoybell-7]

BTS - CONNECT : LONDON - GB - 'Catharsis' - Jakob Kudsk - 2020 [BTS - Min Yoon-gi aka Suga]

[sugadaily]

[CONNECT, BTS] Secret Docents of 'Catharsis' by SUGA @ London

[bangtan]

[CONNECT, BTS] Secret Docents of 'Catharsis' by V @ London

[sparrowsabre7]

Used a guide, because life is short and this game is long. So I'm meant to talk to Fragile by selecting Fragile jump in my room. I guess that makes sense but given it's only ever been for fast travel not sure how I would have worked that out as a method of communicating, or that Fragile could put you into a beach.

It's quite a nice story beat, that Fragile can't jump to Amelie as previously explained, but she can jump to Sam and Sam can get to Amelie through the things that bind each of them like knots on a strand. It may be a little on the nose but it still works, as does perhaps the first moment of consensual touch Sam allows in the game, after Fragile quietly says "I'll have to touch you" and he silently accepts. For all his weird sexualisation of some scenarios and badly worded dialogue, Kojima can still sell emotional beats when he needs to.

On the beach at last; ok, Higgs is Darth Vader now and has force powers. He creates a BT spiderweb and sets Amelie at the centre before a fourth wall breaking monologue about stick vs rope and one last boss fight: no items, final destination, Fox only.

It's Strandin' Time!

Ok this kind of... blows. It's a stealth segment where he can find out where you are almost instantly. Why the fuck wouldn't you take any weapons Sam? It's really hard to break line of sight. I know I need to throw the boxes to distract him but it's not working. Did manage to yeet one right in his dumb fucking face though. Didn't see that coming Mr. God Particle.

Ah fuck this; LEEROOOOOY mmJENKINS!! Decked the shit out of him then pivoted to bind and then kick the shit out of him some more. God, that's satisfying.

After a few rounds of that, "I don't need a gun Sam". Brave of you to say half way through the fight dickwad. Come at me.

When you were partying, I studied the strand. When you were learning how to control BTs, I mastered the parry mechanic. While you wasted your days at the gym in pursuit of vanity, I cultivated inner strength. And now that the world is on fire and the barbarians are at the gate you have the audacity to come to me for a boss fight and expect victory. Welcome to dirt, punk.

Oh, and apparently you don't need a gun but do need grenades. You're a real honourable warrior, Higgs. Truly the last of the samurai.

Kicked out a Snake-like "Aaaaaah" from him and it's over.

No. Wait. Round 3. "We got DOOMS, Sam! This was only ever gonna end one way." Ok, I... I don't know what that means but now we're in Tekken apparently. Health bars above our heads and everything. Oh no, it's Mortal Kombat, with the slow mo jaw break.

This...

This is kind of a shitty end to a boss fight... I'm literally hammering attack and winning it's just so incongruous with the rest of the game, should have left it at stage 2.

It's got dramatic music like it's meant to be the Snake and Liquid fight in MGS4 but I have no emotional connection to Higgs, in-game or out. He's just kind of a shithead, there's no brotherly bond here and he's not been established enough.

Ah multiple headbutts finisher. It is literally trying to be that MGS4 fight.

I know this isn't the end since Cliff's thing is still unresolved, but it is definitely trying hard to feel that way.

Oh shut the fuck up Higgs, stop with your "you won but still lost" bullshit. Fragile, kill the fuck out of him, please. Ugh, don't repeat I'm not that Fragile like it's your catchphrase.

Ha! Fuck you Higgs! Run out of BT juice. Oh... was that it? One punch. Also, don't just repeat "You're damaged goods" back to him like you're in a Joss Whedon film and that's an adequate comeback. Wow after a strong start this not-finale has been super anti-climactic.

Oh nope,she is going to shoot him. But offscreen. Fragile managed to bring Lou over too, nice. "Where should I take you?" Fragile asks, before Amelie butts in with "He doesn't need you, he's got me." Alright, calm down. Jealous much. But Sam is like "yeah you should go." Glad Fragile at least calls them both out on it.

Ok, so now Amelie says she could have left at any time basically, but did it to force Sam to connect the Chiral network.

And now we're "Mario and Princess Beach" running back home.

And now everything has gone insane. Now Bridget is here but maybe she's also Amelie and Die-Hardman is here to kill Bridget for fucking the world up and now Cliff is here and he knows Die-Hardman (who's real name is John) and Bridget is sending him after Sam but now she's Amelie again and behind Sam and tells him to run by pushing him in the sea, causing him to repatriate but in the repatriation sequence it's not BB inside Sam but one of those horrid dolls.

What the FUCK.

Ok and now I'm back in my room and Deadman tells me Amelie ported me here and then checked out to "finish what Bridget started" which I'm guessing may still mean blow up the world or the beach or something. Christ it has got very dense very quickly.

"We've been operating on the assumption, Higgs was controlling Cliff"; have we? News to me, I always assumed they were two separate antagonists given the Battlefield was entirely separate from Higgs' brand of goopy nonsense. So now Cliff has Amelie AND Die-Hardman on the beach. Great so things have gotten worse. Now Fragile can't port me to the beach either because reasons.

So I have to walk all the way back East all the fucking way because she transported all the secondary characters before me.

Thanks a fucking lot. This has been a real kick me while I'm down moment.

At least I don't need to carry anything there save protection and climbing gear. Hope I can at least drive some of it.

Ooh more flashback time. Looks like Bridget was intending to use BB as a sacrifice to build the UCA, unclear if by causing the Death Stranding or somehow starting the Chiral network.

Anyway now I'm walking these 6k or whatever back to Lake Knot. Some zipline help but one asshole put the zipline where the dismount is off a cliff. Sam echoes this though with a "nice zipline, asshole".

I also have no equipment, so stopping off at the paleontologist to gear up. Nice, a free bike too. Everything's coming up Bridges.

Oh fuck off Deadman, I don't want a Cliff notes session (pun intended), especially when you're just restating a bunch of theories. So Cliff wants BB to b whole, yep already gathered, the battlefield is tied to him due to his anger dragging his hellscape through with him. Sure, cool, can I get back to my drive now?

Oh come on... BTs can now spawn as catchers immediately, don't even need to grab you. Fuck this, I'm running. Sorry purple bike!

Jesus fucking christ Deadman, fuck OFF. Blah blah secret BB experiements were to make BT detectors but actually they were designed to make the Chiral network like I thought.

Oh.

They made the network by building all the cities with a BB integrated into each one.

Jesus Fucking Christ, I didn't see that coming...

That's some heavy shit man. This is that episode of Doctor Who with the space whale heavy.

While I ponder that horrific choice I'll inevitably have to make I am enjoying coming back and seeing how much bigger the highways have gotten in my absence. It's so fun to boost down them on a trike.

Another call from Deadman. Cliff put his BB in the care of the scientists but didn't know they were going to use the BB for the Chiral network, I assume he thought the experiments were benign per the lie told. Deadman says he's unsure how he was able to arrive on Bridget's beach and that there must be more to their connection so I'm going to go ahead and guess, he's Sam's father as well as the BB's, or he's a sibling of Bridget.

Fucking hell, another call from Deadman. Jesus give it a rest. No apparent connection between Die-Hardman and Bridget because his past has all been redacted, also suggested that Die-Hardman had no connection with Amelie/Bridget and that it's DH connection to Cliff that allowed him access to Bridget/Amelie's beach. God my head hurts.

Heartman's saying that the beaches are beginning to merge into a single seam, aside from the battlefield and Heartman's beaches. Amelie may have some kind of super bridge that controls all beaches which further my theory that she was BB patient zero.

Oh boy, big ol' Chiral storm, looks like it's battlefield time.

Flashback time, Cliff gives a sad speech about being a father and it looks like Die-Hardman killed Cliff under Bridget's orders.

Ok we're in Vietnam now and Cliff's wearing DH's mask. Comparatively this opener is less badass than the WWI and II battlefields but only in comparison. In any other games this would be a ridiculously cool moment. The arena itself excels as always, still not sure I could pick a favourite. Vietnam feels more linear but the mix of violent explosions, fire and oppressive silence and darkness work so well together.

Ok, I was wrong, actually reaching Cliff gives a supremely cool scene of Cliff and co marching through a lake of fire.

Another intense game of cat and mouse later and Cliff is finally down.

It's actually a really nice moment of emotional catharsis. Cliff begins to whistle a tune to BB and Sam completes it. It's not a big shock reveal, just a quiet mutual realisation that Cliff is Sam's father. They embrace and then a gunshot is heard and Cliff disappears, having first transitioned from combat gear to a suit, I hope implying his becoming whole and at peace. Despite minimal development until this past hour of exposition, Cliff has been a much more successful antagonist compared with Higgs.

Another flashback, DH is saying that Cliff should escape with his BB, but he will be forced to carry out any orders Bridget gives, hence the previous flashback. Seems DH was one of Cliff's soldiers. Still unclear if the woman lying on the bed, who is Cliff's wife, is the same person as Bridget. It's deliberately vague and when Bridget approached the BB in a previous scene her face was covered with DH'S mask.

Oh... Sam seems to think Cliff is Lou's father but that very much wasn't my take away from that scene. Deadman comes along with a recording of DH, says that Amelie left a message for him to get to the beach with one of Cliff's dolls. He knows it's a trap but plays along anyway and says Amelie also has no recorded past and made the point no one's ever met her in person. Seems to point to the fact that she may only exist on the beach.

DH says that her soul remained on the beach while her body deteriorated in the real world, but with high DOOMs abilities. She could then travel to the beach body and soul by the time she was 20 and the president said never contact Amelie except by hologram, but once the Chiral network was up and running DH checked the old records:

Bridget had uterine cancer in her 20s and never had children, yet Amelie is the spit of a younger Bridget, so... what's the connection?

Ok, now Fragile's here, and says Amelie was behind Higgs, she led the Demens and he abandoned Fragile when Amelie showed up, began the extinction initiative. She could control BTs and she was the one who turned Higgs into Homo Demens, able to command BTs at will. There was no BB in Higgs' chest pack either, only another of the dolls Cliff had.

But if that's all true, then why did she not just trigger the death stranding when Sam competed the network? Why did she need Sam to kill Higgs?

Another chapter closes but I feel we've still got a ways to go.

[fyeah-bangtan7]

[CONNECT, BTS] Secret Docents of 'Catharsis' by SUGA @ London

[voxyldy]

Credit: Bangtan Subs / Big Hit Labels

🐯🦊🐹💋💜💕