#compromising information

[optogeneticist-nsfw]

i Uh.Well enjoy!!!!

link

[flagellant]

Overly familiar question about your merits

Polite yet firm reminder of boundaries

[cuties-in-codices]

taking a ride

in an illustrated copy of konrad von würzburgs "trojanerkrieg" (the trojan war), ca. 1441

the illustration depicts thetis and her servant riding dolphins, behind them achilles unconscious in a bag

source: Nürnberg, GNM, Hs. 998, fol. 31v

[boltlightning]

im planning on making will turner for my next baldur's gate multiplayer character, and that got me trying to figure out what the cast's class and stat array would look like if they were characters in a campaign. these are the fruits of my labor. i am open to changing my mind.

elizabeth swann: sorcerer. natural charisma and an innate sense of calculation and cunning. quick to consider a lot of options at once. later on she gets more close-range options and can control whole battlefields. (dump stat: strength, the classic spellcaster minmax choice)

will turner: fighter, potential multiclass into rogue (or even cleric, depending on how you read into the ferryman thing). he does one thing really really good and it's fight things. comes with a lot of great proficiencies and a background that seems mundane but is deeply tied in with the narrative. of course. (dump stat: intelligence. sorry. his wis is good though.)

jack sparrow: a classic thief rogue — though i think you could argue for arcane trickster too. stumbles into situations and skill checks himself out of them. hidden depths lie beneath a roguish exterior and many, many sessions of bullshittery that somehow always tie back into the main plot. (dump stat: constitution. he's gotten hit in the head so many goddamn times.)

barbossa: hear me out: warlock. they have a lot of variation that can make it hard to tell what class they are, and you could argue that the aztec gold and later calypso are patrons to which he owes his unlife and, subsequently, his powers. comes with a high charisma stat for chewing the scenery. (dump stat: he cheated his stat rolls and has none)

norrington: paladin. my god. a paragon of light until he breaks his oath in dmc through no fault of his own and destroys himself clawing his way back into favor. (dump stat: strength, so he can be a dex-based paladin but his wis is probably next lowest)

beckett: bard. no further explanation.

davy jones: has since surpassed the levels of the class-based system but was a cleric, back in the day, devoted to a goddess he believed abandoned him. no it hasn't defined his existence for centuries. no he's not bitter. why do you ask?

calypso: aforementioned goddess ex. you know how it is.

governor swann: npc the dm has to frantically make a statblock for when he's suddenly drawn into a fight. he has 6hp.

[iwonderwh0]

What happened and what exactly caused this shift in internet culture that caused new generation of users announcing in capital letters that they're minors instead of creating fake online identity

[shitpostingkats]

You know thinking about it now, Roboppi messes me up even more because Ai probably wanted to give one more ai a chance at the life he couldn’t have. One good thing he could do before he died. And someone he knew would take care of Yusaku when he was gone.

[medinaquirin]

I hate letting shitty people take up real estate in my brain, but sometimes the bastards refuse to leave.

[possession1981-moving]

just jacob gifs (10/?)

[mortuaryribbon]

annoyed at a certain community again. A lot of them are complicit in racism & microaggressions and it's like. I'll see some trying to kiss my or other black ppls asses and i just know it's just to make themselves appear as if they arent racist. But when you tell them that one of their friends was racist to you, they act all sympathetic but still are buddy-buddy with them. Its whatever, if you want to be that person's friend still, godspeed. But don't expect me to talk to you much or at all anymore, since you're obv ok with how they are as a person.

[ganondoodle]

what people need to know about me is that i am emotionally as strong as an old wet towel, when i seemingly yell about something, imagine that wet towel flopping pathetically back and forth and thats all it does

[musical-chick-13]

Today I realized TNotD, aka "You are always here to me" aka Kiss Scene of All Time is. More than 11 years old. It's been over a decade.

[kraviolis]

im glad belos got what he deserved and is actually fully gone for good and wont ever hurt anyone ever again, but its also really funny and fascinating to think about shoving luz and ghost-belos into a locked room together where neither of them can physically harm each other and just force them to have an actual honest conversation for once

[lfthinker]

The agony of being a Batman fic writer is being forced to acknowledge some really fucking stupid parts of DC lore in order for the character’s actions to make any sense. I am of course, referring to Identity Crisis. Self inflicted problem I realize, but I really wanted to play with Tim as an antagonist.

[referencees]

What the fuck is going on with fashion lately??? I feel like since covid clothing design has gone absolutely off the rails. I look at online retailers and see the ugliest pieces of clothing I’ve ever seen, made out of plasticity tissue paper-ass fabric, being sold for upwards of $70 and I’m just dumbfounded. Or they’re selling the most basic boring tshirt for like $50+.

Like why is it all so fucking ugly??? Who is buying this shit??? I don’t wanna shit on people with unique tastes in clothes at all, do your thing! But there’s a difference between unique style and poorly made, poorly constructed pieces with no coherent design.

I know the answer is probably fast fashion and ultimately capitalism and unsustainable business just like literally everything, but I’m just so sick and tired of all this. Y’all gonna stop giving these people money for absolute trash.

[unsen]

conspiracy theory trisha paytas is personally taking out every member of the royal family with bitcoin paid hitmen

[foldingfittedsheets]

The bed we’re staying on at my betrotheds dads house is. Quite bad. But the worst part is he put a new mattress on an old box spring and it’s so fucking squeaky. Every time we move at night there’s an unholy shrieking of tortured wood begging to be freed of its duty on this mortal coil.

I suggested to my betrothed that we just pick the mattress up and put it on the floor to sleep instead.

“Like, in secret? I don’t want them to know...”

“Of course in secret! Are you crazy? Yes!”

Time for plan: Secret Floor Mattress.