#completely normal RPG
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a garden of white triumphinator tulips for fun and profit
#lancer#lancer rpg#balor#mech#mecha#my art#having a completely normal one imagining how this thing moves in combat
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i finally finished bg3
and it only took me [looks at steam]
SIX HUNDRED HOURS
#merlin.txt#w/ the new computer the rest of act 3 went by super quickly#honestly i dont think my computer and my sanity would have survived all those cutscenes#ANYWAYS initial thoughts:#cried like a baby. ending credits songs really really good. i can't WAIT to start a new playthru. HOWEVER:#oh my god the ending felt so fucking rushed. i was expecting like a typical rpg ending slideshow at LEAST but nothing???#like you only get One cutscene with your romanced partner (a short one too) but i don't get to see what everyone else is doing??? hello??#gale is literally like 'lets celebrate' and we don't get to see the celebration??? or at the very least a chance to talk to everyone again#like in act 1 and 2????#imo i think the most satisfying one was lae'zels. god i love her#also act 3 is hella buggy especially towards the end. a lot of broken dialogue. but ah well#OK NOW SPOILER THOUGHTS SAMMIE DONT LOOK:#the game Really wants you to turn illithid but i ended up just letting karlach do it ... i felt bad .. but like#i found the arc of my tav like. getting So close to going full power hungry and martyr and hero only to finally be humbled like -#'you dont have to always play hero' was really interesting. like doing that and then hearing the post credits 'the power' song. gshldgksmal#guy who is soo miserable abt the fact that all their cool illithid powers are now gone. has to go back to being normal#ALSO. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THE ENDING AST SCENE. HELLO?#HIM RUNNING AWAY FROM THE SUN. IT BEING COMPLETELY PLAYED FOR LAUGHS. SO MEAN#any other time i may have laughed but the fact that you dont really get epilogues made that Really sting.#THE FACT THAT THE COMPANIONS ARE NOT EVEN NICE ABOUT IT??????
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you see, the joke is that the idea of a halfling being spooky is inherently absurd because small people of course are, themselves, inherently absurd, unlike actual people,
#hey probablybadrpgideas why is this completely normal character concept on your Bad RPG Ideas gimmick blog!!#well PEOPLE can have any of the possible traits a person might have but Little People are too silly to be fully realized creations#someone who's SHORT also being SPOOKY??? don't be RIDICULOUS#angery. angery about this one. lmao
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everything i've heard about the candela live show is solidifying the direct line i've seen since launch from sagas of sundry to where we are now and I'm just so 👐👐 excited about it
#there really was so much innovative ttrpg stuff happening w alpha in 2017/18 w things like we're alive and r&r building on some big swings#they took w sos and it was really like. they really made some of the best stuff ever and then got completely shut down#and so many people will never see that stuff (although a lot has been rescued at this point)#i'm so happy esp for marisha as cd to keep pushing in that direction cause she seemed so passionate about it at the time#(there are definitely shows out there that have built on this kind of theatrical approach too from what i know of hyper rpg et al#+ cr did undeadwood which was built on much of the same stuff but obviously no longer exists)#wrt to candela i will say the first season didn't super grab me just bc of how much it felt like...normal critical role#but with future chapters (which i haven't yet seen all of) and different gms they've been iterating well and making GREAT stuff#which the liveshow seems to thrive in as well :)#+ i love the game. and i love the setting. and casting matters so much#it speaks
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absolutely EATING THE DRYWALL over the act 2 resist!durge scene. it’s been three fucking days and im still like. you MEAN i have to Get Up and Go To Work and Function when ALL i can think about is this and it makes me go INSANE. like the absolute emotions of that are something i haven’t felt from anything less than actual tabletop and it’s just. here. in this goddamn video game. and fucking. we all know the scene. probably everyone knows the version of the scene i personally got, even if they didn’t get it themself. and yet. and YET. i cannot even put into WORDS exactly how all of that hit because it’s not even just the one goddamn scene it’s the 60+ hours of choices i have been making up to that point and 60+ hours of time i have put into the relationships i have built with the rest of my party and cutscenes before it that maybe only went the same way for like 0.1% of other people as they did for me or even happened At The Same Time as they did for me and i just. i just!!!!!!
#I JUST HAVE TO GO TO WORK AND PRETEND TO BE NORMAL MEANWHILE IM SITTING HERE EATING THE DRYWALL LIKE#THEY DONT KNOW I ALMOST KILLED MY VAMPIRE#WHO SPENT LITERALLY THE ENTIRITY OF ACT 1 BEING STANDOFFISH AT ME#WHO ONLY DECIDED HE TRUSTED ME LITERALLY THE NIGHT BEFORE#WHO FUCKING STOOD UP FOR ME TO THE REST OF THE CAMP AFTER THE FIRST TIME I KILLED SOMEONE EVEN THOUGH HE DIDN’T LIKE ME YET#THEY DON’T KNOW THAT I LET HIM KILL ME WAY BACK IN ACT 1. THEY DON’T KNOW ABOUT THE PARALLELS.#THEY DON’T EVEN KNOW THAT THE INCANTATION FOR THE LESSER RESTORATION HE HEALED ME WITH THE FOLLOWING MORNING MEANS *i absolve you*#SCREAMING AND CHEWING THE DRYWALL AND CRYING#god fucking. neil newbon put his WHOLE CHEST into voicing that scene!!!!!!!!!!!#COMPLETELY ripped and tore into my entire heart#unquestionably my favorite moment in a video game i have EVER experienced and like. i eat up rpgs constantly. i have a lot to compare to.#that was really something fucking *incredible*#and to think i have a good hundred hours left to go!!!!!! screams!!!!!!!!!#who even knows what will eviscerate me next!!!!!!!#bg3#the paranoid android speaks!
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sometimes i really wanna write about my favourite things about yiik and then i remember i cant put my thoughts into words correctly and i have the mental capacity of a toddler
#okay but if i could i would just write about all the insane meta shit going on below the surface level of the game's story liek#there is SO MUCH insane shit i could talk about it for hours ive never experienced a piece of media like this before#i genuinely cant wait for i.v to drop i need the new content NYEEEOOOWWW [ shakes the bars of my enclosure ]#anyways play yiik a postmodern rpg its genuinely such a good fucking game#(if youre extremely autistic like me and somehow able to completely ignore any gameplay flaws that is#idk i love the gameplay dude everyone complained abt the minigames and shit but theyre all so fun#tho alex's normal attack was the best change fuck that stupid record player#but yeah anyways um . go play gaem cery good 😊😊😊😊😊😊🙏🙏i love videogames!!!!!!!#text tag
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They mean so much to me..
#glitch.bat#glitch plays moon rpg#replaying and still so happy with how them being together is treated as completely normal?#nothing is said of it. it's far stranger that his partner has recently decided to take up a new life as a signpost#great stuff. love these wierdo boys.
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That previous reblog, actually something I think about a LOT, LOL. Everyday I’m sad fnv didnt get more development time because i think I could really love it… and while I consider it the best fallout game, its not my favorite. fo4 takes the cake there its just too much fun to play, regardless of the story… i SOOOOO desperately want to enjoy fnv more but the gameplay makes it REALLY hard for me. as a stupid bad gamer. dont come at me with “skill issue” i KNOW!!!! its a phenomenal game with awesome art direction and storytelling and characters. but the tiny amount of time they had to develop it Does show. You and i both know that.
fo1/2 are a close third place because i think theyre really strong basis :] and i love the art direction in them. Praying bethesda will one day stop making us be vault dwellers though. It could be so much more interesting. this is fo4 lovemail… ily fo4.
edit bc i should mention this YES they should put back the story-based gameplay elements that were in previous games. the karma system most notably. when i say better gameplay here i refer to Action gameplay and not Story gameplay. But they SHOULD bring back the story gameplay elements bc they rule and i miss them.
rant in tags dont argue abt it with me if you come across this by searching fo game names this is for my own BLAG!!!
TLDR; i like all the fallout main games. Dont hate on my girl 4 so much… I know shes the poster child of bethesda mainstreaming the games. its not her fault… its still SO much fun to play.
#ok personal gripe goes in the tags.#i understand that people are against fo4 due to it being an RPG where they feel their roleplaying is limited.#and like yeah i get it i guess but that has never been an issue for me )3$/)/6;&3#like if you are really so thrown off by the story invading how you want to play… ignore it. maybe im just too experienced ignoring canon.#but its fun easy & free to just turn off the main quest and do your own thing and imagine as you go along.. as opposed to feeling like you#HAVE to follow nate/nora’s story..#and even if your imagination isnt strong enough to completely block it out then theres mods for it#i would understand being angry abt it when the game first came out and there were no mods. but be serious… its been a long time.#IDK just . it gets on my nerves LOL. Im not saying it couldnt have been better. it absolutely couldve. bethesda is an enormous company.#dont ignore how fun it is to Play#RANT OVER#i love falout#gaeming#normally i keep this kind of thought to myself cause like whatever. nerd rage. but i like talking abt fo…#everyones allowed to hate fo4 im not going to try and stop u. but when this is the only argument i see against it its like YAAWWWNNNN!!!!!
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i haven't posted anything on youtube in a hot minute
#i kinda wanna record like video accompaniment for the persona 2 walkthrough i wrote#or maybe i could record a normal final fantasy 10 LP now that i've actually beaten it#RPGs take much longer than the only completed LP i've posted though lmao (that being life is strange)#whateverrrrr
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sometimes I'll just be sitting here doing nothing and my brain will randomly remind me "god, Cyberpunk 2077 is such a bad RPG." and I'll be like yeah, facts. thanks for reminding me so I don't buy whatever half-baked sequel CDPR come up with
#for all of Starfield's flaws at least it has aftergame#and doesn't just freeze you in time pre-ending if you want to actually keep playing#and then all the cbp77 endings are circlejerking trash from dudes who think they're way smarter than they are#gaming#games#RPGs#like if I had to summarise the CBP77 exprience in two words#it would be#''dissapointing and pointless''#because that's how the story and all the RPG elements feel#you might as well have just given us the sandbox with no or little story#because the only time I had fun was when I was cruising around and ignoring the story completely#the more I'm forced to interact with the messy and stupid main story all I can think is how dumb it all is and how it dosn't make sense#yeah I'm dying in 5 weeks but I have time to hoard every apartment in night City#dk where that time came from but yknow#dk why I never feel a sense of urgency towards the fact I'm DYING#because the game can't actually give you a time limit and still be a sandbox RPG#from the very onset they fucked themselves and they refuse to fix it by letting V live normally as a merc again for some reason#just idiot gamers ig
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Dash: ass-in-ass creed Me: [takes a puff of my cigar as I look off my window with an ice-cold whiskey glass in hand] I know it well, Horatio.
#I am completely normal about that franchise. Completely. jsdfjsjdfs#tWO MONTHS TILL MIRAGE HOW WE FEELIN'#;ooc tag#me a cranky old man: let me tell you why the rpg creeds sUCK--#Ubisoft Bloat is a real thing lmao. also imo dialogue options do NOT work for ac games#shoutout to odyssey not giving kassandra a characterisation bc you could go from calm and collected to an absolute bloodthirsty maniac#in ONE dialogue tree#LIKE BRO HOW TF ARE YOU GOING TO MAKE PARKOUR A BORING CHORE IN AN AC GAME. HOW DO YOU DO THAT. HOW.
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backloggd reviews of miitopia are driving me insane you people dont understand you are not understanding.... this is Not a game where you use friendship mechanics to get better at combat. this is a game where you grind combat to increase your friendship so you can get better at combat. THIS IS A FRIENDSHIP SIM... DISGUISED AS AN RPG. getting mad at the unconventional combat is like getting mad at overcooked bc it isnt a cooking sim game like cooking mama LIKE.
#and saying how theres no difficulty but also saying how job switching is discouraged bc u need to grind since levels dont transfer over#almost like... there IS difficulty in the game#(also the game is designed to not make grinding unbearable there is literally a SAFE SPOT u can dump ur new job switched#character into and play the combat normally. and after one battle u can get a level 1 chara to level 5 bc of exp levelling#and if u fight a tougher character or boss u can immediately get them to level 10-ish. and if its too difficult then its completely optiona#i agree it can feel repetitive but i believe this is the case for any turn-based rpg game and this aspect is saved by#environment/storytelling/whatever. which miitopia delivers upon excellently#like obviously u can think whatever u want about anything but i WILL defend the game design of this title bc this shit is Very well done
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Leaving the meta bullshit aside, I think what I most appreciate about Final Fantasy VII Rebirth is how – even more Remake, if that's possible – it manages to present a world that's just intensely weird simply by taking the casual absurdity that was completely normal for 1990s console RPGs and playing it straight in a tonal context that usually studiously avoids that sort of thing. Remake is like "okay, the original game has you fighting a killer house – what would that look like in a less cartoony milieu?", and then Rebirth is like "hold my beer".
#gaming#video games#final fantasy vii rebirth#final fantasy vii remake#final fantasy vii#final fantasy#game design#worldbuilding#final fantasy vii rebirth spoilers#final fantasy vii remake spoilers#final fantasy vii spoilers#final fantasy spoilers#spoilers#violence mention#alcohol mention
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𝐏𝐈𝐂𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐄-𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐅𝐄𝐂𝐓
➸ PAIRING: Lieutenant Simon 'Ghost' Riley x gn!reader (aside from a single idiom whose origin uses masculine language/pronouns - every man for himself) ➸ SUMMARY: Against all odds, the Lieutenant accidentally falls asleep on your shoulder. Unfortunately, there are witnesses to the precarious situation (just your luck that it would be Gaz and Soap). ➸ WORD COUNT: 2k
𝐒𝐎𝐌𝐄 𝐒𝐀𝐆𝐄 𝐀𝐃𝐕𝐈𝐂𝐄: don't poke the bear.
Danger in your line of work typically consists of trying to walk away from a mission while still being left completely intact (i.e. the goal is to make it out alive, in one piece). You’ve survived a great number of ordeals: cornered into a shootout with a dwindling supply of ammo, tiptoed your way through a field of pressure-sensitive IEDs, dove towards probable death (with an awfully high probability of splattering onto hot, concrete hell like a bug on a windshield) because your helo was sent tail spinning courtesy of a perfectly-aimed RPG – and really, the list goes on.
It's been child’s play, in the grand scheme of things. An extensive catalogue of life-or-death scenarios accounts for your entire military career. And sure, this might be a bit of a stretch, but you'd wager that none of those instances thus far have been as high-stakes as the current predicament you’ve found yourself in.
Jesus-fucking-Christ. Why’d Ghost have to fall asleep on you?
𝐀 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃 𝐎𝐅 𝐂𝐀𝐔𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍: avoid sitting next to him on the plane ride home. You've had to learn it the hard way.
And the kicker is that this whole thing could’ve been avoided; it didn’t have to be your problem. You could’ve sentenced any one of the other soldiers to your seat. Every man for himself, right? Get off scot-free, have a normal trip back to base with plenty of legroom so that you’re not cramped. Theoretically, it would've been beautiful – a passenger's paradise, the closest you could get to a first-class ticket.
But no.
Instead, play the Good Samaritan; extend your hand out with an act of benevolence. What’s the harm, right? So, you'd spared the poor guy, said you wouldn't mind switching places with him because he'd looked as white as a damn sheet at the idea of being crammed beside this behemoth of a lieutenant who's infamously every FNG's living nightmare.
Yeah, well hindsight is 20/20. Had you known what was going to happen, you would've had no reservations about throwing him under the bus. Sayonara, mate.
Law of the jungle, plain and simple.
To make matters worse, he is, in fact, exhibiting terrible flight etiquette. His head (which is dead weight and feels about as pleasant as a fucking bowling ball, mind you) has taken up every inch of real estate on your shoulder and is practically tucked into the curve of your neck; you’ll need to take a trip to the chiropractor’s after this – several, probably. The edge of his skull mask is digging into you. And, the cherry on top: get this – he’s man-spreading, so his left leg's trespassing into your own territory and brushing against your thigh. Utter lack of regard for personal space.
Incredible.
You’d still rather die than wake him up, though. You're not sure what'll happen if you do, but that's a risk you're not willing to take.
All things considered, an achy shoulder is a much better alternative than incurring the wrath of one angry Lieutenant. He's more subdued in this kind of context. To be completely honest, if you weren't already well-acquainted with him, you'd find it endearing.
From here, it's easy to see the simple rise and fall of his chest, steady and even. Slow inhale in, slow exhale out. He's at peace, a rhythmic lull that matches your own breathing. You can't quite put your finger on the exact moment he fell asleep. (He's got a habit of shutting his eyes and folding his arms over his chest when he isn't in the mood to converse with the other soldiers onboard. But God willing, he would never voluntarily loll his head onto your shoulder.) For what it's worth, he deserves the rest – never been one to do it this soundly as countless missions have taught you that he's usually a light sleeper. You remember him roughly prodding the toe of his boot at Soap's arm once when the Scot was conked out and his snores were a bit loud for Ghost's taste.
Rather odd then, that the Lieutenant even managed to allow himself to doze off like this. It’s too loud, too unsteady – the droning of the plane engine doesn't exactly make for good white noise and the turbulence outside is jostling the cabin around. Moreover, this puts him in a position of vulnerability, and he’s not the type to let his guard down so easily.
But somehow he did it with you beside him.
You try not to think about the implications of that.
𝐈𝐓 𝐆𝐄𝐓𝐒 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐒𝐄, 𝐎𝐅 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐒𝐄.
Because, Soap's just woken up from his nap, the first among the entire company of soldiers in the cabin still sleeping, excluding yourself. His seat's parallel to yours, straight across the walkway within direct line of sight, so he’s got an unobstructed view of you and Ghost. Soap sends a questioning glance in your direction, eyebrow quirked. A look that says, The hell's going on?
The level of your voice is down; it's at a conservative decibel to avoid rousing the others. Yet you convey your distress with the same amount of passion as if you were stuck in the middle of a losing firefight. "MacTavish, help."
Soap works with bombs for a living. Surely, he's capable of defusing situations too.
Alright the man’s a demolitions expert, but that’s semantics.
He blinks like he's trying to make sense of the situation. Though, it's pretty obvious what the problem is here. You're not sure why he’s got to take a moment and contemplate it. You need a solution, now. And he's moving at a snail's pace.
For a second, you think he might sympathize with your plight.
But then his mouth morphs into a shit-eating grin and when he nudges Gaz awake, you know right then and there that you're absolutely fucked.
More witnesses.
Great.
Because that’s just what you need, isn’t it?
Gaz drags a hand down his face. He pans over to his right to figure out why he’s been jolted awake so suddenly, and sees Soap who’s inexplicably, nauseatingly jovial before his eyes land on you.
Much like Soap’s original reaction, Gaz can’t help but offer a quizzical expression. The confusion is evident. His brows are drawn together because he knows that the L.t. wouldn't fall asleep on your shoulder.
Soap's shifting, sliding his hand into his pocket before pulling out his phone. He messes with it – a few taps here, a few swipes there. And then before you're registering what's happening, he's aiming it straight at you, like one of those mums getting a snapshot of their kids in matching jumpers during the holidays.
"Say cheese."
An indignant gasp leaves your mouth. "If you so much as—
"Soap, no. Don't do that." Gaz says from beside him, plucking the phone out of his hands. He tsks him with a click of his tongue. Stern disapproval in spades. The meaning is clear: it’s a big thumbs down from the Brit. He’s not endorsing this type of behavior. “Gone mad now, have you?” he asks in admonishment.
You release a sigh of relief. Finally, some moral support. He's reliable. Your faith in him is unshakable. Always could count on Gaz to get you out of—
"Have to shoot with a wide angle, see? Or else it'll look wonky," he corrects, flipping the phone horizontally before handing it back to Soap.
"Aye, thanks mate.”
Gaz's smile isn't as excessive as Soap's but the smirk gracing his face tells you he's relishing in your misery all the same.
Fucking traitor.
"Knobheads—"
They’d risk their own hides to save you from certain death. You've seen it in Cairo, Valencia, and Seoul. Good men. Good hearts in the right place as well. However, they're also the type to embarrass you at every opportunity – public humiliation being somewhere on that roster as well. And for that, you want to strangle them.
"Rude,” Soap comments pointedly.
"Bite me, MacTavish."
"Just wake him up if it's bothering you," Gaz supplies unhelpfully.
"If you were in my shoes, would you do it?"
"'Course, not," he snorts. "I don’t have a death wish.”
“Well, I also prefer my head on my shoulders, thank you very much," you whisper furiously, nearly hissing at him.
And Soap is admiring his handiwork, when he coos, “Aw, the two o' you make quite the pair." He briefly twists the screen so that you can catch a glimpse of it, and even from this distance, you can confirm that he's captured the shot. Annoyingly well, to add insult to injury. Angle? Spot-on. Lighting? Brilliant. It's interesting, has character. Black and white photography. He's managed to make a stunning composition and your upper lip is curling up into a sneer of disgust at his artistic eye. How infuriating.
"I'll send this to the Cap. He’ll get a kick outta it."
"Sod off."
"He'll appreciate bein' included."
Gaz matches the energy with an equally gleeful smile, now delighted by the idea. “Hey, and the L.t. he looks—”
“—cute," Soap has the audacity to finish for him.
What.
There are many words that you’d use to describe Ghost.
Cutthroat, maybe. Imposing. Glacial. Taciturn. A stringent set of ideals that makes him the perfect soldier: disciplined, honed, fierce. Intimidating, if he's not fighting on your side – someone you'd much rather have on your team than against, unless you fancied death. He can be a stone-cold terror on occasion. The man’s been penned as a walking horror story by those in the military. Given his iron-hearted demeanor, you'd be hard-pressed to disagree with that statement; there's not much room to call his steel-encased resolve into question.
So, yeah. Above all else, he's certainly not cute.
Your eyes narrow at them. "Congratulations, the both of you have officially made the top of my shitlist."
Soap, indifferent to your crisis, asks, "Want a copy for your wallpaper?"
There's another heated remark waiting on the tip of your tongue, because there's no way in hell that you would and you're ready to tell him off, about to give him an earful.
But somebody else beats you to it.
“Wipe that picture, or I’ll wring your bloody necks.”
Ice surges through your veins. Goosebumps break out across your skin. Because that voice belongs to one person. Oh, Christ. Never in a million years would you want to be on the receiving end of it.
There's anxiety warping in your chest. You're scared stiff, paralyzed with fear in a way that implores you to remain stock-still. The coarse fabric of your trousers bunches underneath your palms as you try not to freak out. This isn't your fault. None of it is.
And here's the worst part: Ghost hasn't lifted his head from your shoulder yet.
But Soap's unfazed. He blinks a couple of times, seems like he's weighing his options – as if there's something else he could choose besides following his lieutenant's command – yeah, right. He wises up, settling for a simple answer in the end. "Alright, Ghost." His smile makes a reappearance, sweet and well-meaning. Troublemaker. "Any chance you'd like a copy before I do away with it?"
"What kind of fuckin' question is that, Johnny?" he grumbles. "Obviously."
𝐁𝐎𝐍𝐔𝐒 𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄:
"I take it you don't think I'm cute then. Have I got that right?"
"I'm sorry... mind repeating that again, sir?"
"You didn't have anything to say about Soap's comment."
"I have a feeling that whatever I answer will get my arse handed to me, L.t."
He's smiling in response – like sunshine trapped behind clouds. Despite it being obscured by the mask, you can see his eyes crinkling at the corners, which makes the black charcoal that's lining them begin to crease a bit. "Permission to speak freely, Sergeant. You have the floor."
Your mouth parts in surprise. Well, then. Maybe you stand corrected. And so, you appraise him momentarily, giving it some serious thought. There's more to Ghost than you give him credit for. He's terse and rough around the edges, but respected for a reason. Admirable. Someone you think highly of and has deserved your approval. The mask undeniably provides an air of intrigue. “I suppose you can be,” you start off, gradually warming up to him being more approachable. “When you’re not terrorizing the new recruits, that is.”
#i got lazy again#simon riley x reader#simon riley x you#simon riley#simon ghost riley#simon ghost riley x reader#ghost x reader#ghost x you#cod fic#cod mw x reader#cod mw 2#cod modern warfare#call of duty fic#call of duty modern warfare#call of duty modern warfare 2#cod x reader#simon ghost riley x you#simon riley fluff
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bulletproof love (18+)
twitchstreamer!luke x reader
author’s note: omgg this oneshot took all my blood sweat and tears to produce. i am NOT a graphic designer. i do NOT normally write smut. but this idea had to come to fruition before i went insane. HOPE YOU ALL ENJOY!!!!
title is from bulletproof love by pierce the veil. lyrics have no correlation but it IS a certified banger.
tags/warnings: smut!! minors dni. oral (m receiving). use of y/n. not proofread. kinda long. teeheehee etc.
i.
You met Luke Castellan at the grocery store.
He looked like a completely normal (albeit, very attractive) guy in his twenties. His dark curls fell slightly over his warm, chocolate brown eyes. A mischievous smirk was plastered across his cheeks, showing off a small dimple on the left side. He wore a simple hoodie and sweats as he perused the pasta aisle, picking up different jars of sauce and reading the labels absentmindedly. He did, however, have an interesting scar sitting jagged over his cheekbone, but it was so faint that you hadn’t noticed it until way later on.
You would have never guessed he was a near millionaire with close to a million social media followers. You would have never guessed he spent the majority of his life not at the grocery store, but rather streaming FPS and RPG games for an average of fifty thousand views at a time.
You would have never guessed he’d take a liking to you.
You, who worked part time at this very grocery store. You, who didn’t really know the first thing about video games, except that they were confusing and it was insane that some people could build ridiculously complex structures at a mind-boggling speed on Fortnite whilst also shooting with godly precision.
He had backed into you accidentally whilst you were restocking a shelf, causing you to drop a couple glass jars that cracked open upon impact with the floor. You apologized, even though you’d really done nothing wrong. He obviously thought you attractive (or maybe he just didn’t leave the house much?) because his idea of an apology was taking you out to some lavishly expensive dinner the next night.
The dinner was okay but the conversation is what got you hooked. He was so sweet and told you so many wild stories that had you laughing until your chest ached. He paid for the meal and held your hand on the drive home. When he dropped you off, he casually told you his Instagram handle and told you to shoot him a follow. You blushed, smiled, and scurried inside.
You just about died when you saw his profile.
ii.
It’s been about a year since you had started dating Luke Castellan, otherwise known as his twitch handle “SonofHermes.”
(“Because he’s the messenger god, right? In, like, Greek Mythology? And I felt like a damned messenger god when I was a moderator for four different discord servers and a twitch chat—“)
Luke’s twitch streams occured mostly every night, from 8pm to about 3am. He always began his streams with some FPS game (Overwatch, Valorant, CS:GO, or something similar). After a few hours he would swap over to a different game for his variety segment. His chat was hilarious. They loved to tease Luke and joke around with him and donate silly messages. And, of course, because Luke was so very attractive, a decent chunk of his fan base was dedicated towards swooning over his every word and look and smile.
You, honestly, never really minded. Mostly because Luke was yours. You were sure the thirsting from chat would diminish once they knew you were dating. But… you really, truly, had no desire to be in the public eye. Having nearly a million people know your name and your face was daunting and scary. You also had enough common sense to realize that some of his fans were probably batshit crazy and would send you hate and death threats for dating Luke. You were a part time employee and a student; you did not need another reason on top of that to have poor mental health.
Luke loved you unconditionally and that was all that mattered. You were perfectly content spending most evenings to yourself. He was a good boyfriend, though, and did schedule days off to take you out and show you incredible amounts of love and support. You were both very happy and secure in your relationship.
One particular evening, you were staying over at Luke’s apartment. It was a Friday, and you had no work tomorrow, so he bought alcohol and weed and selected a list of movies to marathon. It was basically your most ideal way to spend the weekend.
That was, until, Luke’s gamer friends messaged him on discord, begging him to join their Rust server to defend their group base.
Luke had met these friends through Twitch events and game conventions. There was Percy, who streamed with his girlfriend Annabeth. They were one of the most adored couples in the gaming community. They all lived in the same state, so Luke hung out with them pretty often. There was also Grover, who was Percy’s roommate and would join his streams from time to time. As well, there was Thalia, who was a huge advocate for women in eSports, and played in a professional league. Luke had introduced them too you a few months ago, and they all swore to help keep your relationship a secret.
The five of them often played different games together, as most of their fanbases consisted of the same people, so it really raked in the views and made for good content. Plus, it was just really fun. You knew how much Luke loved his friends and cherished the times they got to play together.
The Rust server was a recent hyperfixation that you were positive would fade once a new MMO came out to grab their attention. But, you were also aware of how much time and effort Luke had spent constructing this base of his.
“Go,” you said, noticing his confliction. “You can have one hour to play. Stream, too, so I can watch out here. But after that, you’re mine for the rest of the night.”
“Yes, ma’am,” Luke said with his devilish grin. He kissed you hard, leaving a swarm of butterflies dancing in your stomach. He hurried off to his bedroom, where he kept his gaming setup, and shut the door.
You were fine with spending an hour alone. Flipping through Netflix, you cracked open a bottle of wine and relaxed into the sofa.
One hour went by fast. Luke didn’t return to the living room.
You picked up your phone and opened the Twitch app, clicking on Luke’s stream. He was currently in the middle of some intense adventure with Percy. Luke’s webcam was situated in the top left corner of the game feed, and he looked so cute and handsome under the glow of the monitor and the purple LED lights.
To be honest, the wine was getting to you. You felt such a strong desire to be near Luke and to feel him and be with him. He bit his lip on camera, deep in concentration, and that action alone had your heart rate increasing.
“Fuck it,” you said, turning off the TV and standing up from the couch. His hour was up, and it was time to take the matter into your own hands.
iii.
Luke enjoyed playing his games with the volume high in his headphones. It allowed him to feel like he was actually in the game, and unaware of the outside world. This also was an issue, because more often than not he would lose track of time and forget about his plans and scheduled events.
He just couldn’t help it — he loved video games. Currently, he was busy perfecting his base on Rust so it wouldn’t be broken into again. It took a lot of effort and concentration, and Percy and Grover dicking around and goofing off did nothing to help his focus.
So, it only made sense that he didn’t notice his bedroom door opening. The door wasn’t in frame on his camera, so he didn’t see it open, either. He didn’t notice it close. He didn’t notice you, getting down on all fours and crawling over to his desk setup.
He didn’t notice you, at all, until you put a hand on his leg.
Luke jumped a bit and glanced down, meeting your mischievous glance and the naughty smile on your cheeks.
“Uh, chat — sorry, gotta go to the bathroom, one sec —“ Luke rushed out. He shut off his camera and muted his mic, double checking that it was definitely muted by quickly scanning the latest messages in his chat:
He rolled his eyes at the messages, and pushed his chair back, glaring at you on the floor. “Baby, what the hell are you doing?!”
You smiled. “I was just missing you, is all.”
“So you snuck in — wait, shit, you said one hour. It’s been an hour hasn’t it?” Luke said, running a hand through his messy curls.
You nodded, and gave a weak shrug. “It’s okay, though. I think it would be fun if we also played a game of our own.”
Luke raised his eyebrows, feeling a blush form on his cheeks. “What’re .. what’re you suggesting?”
You unbuttoned your blouse and tossed to the floor, leaving you in a lacy black bra and your mini skirt. You let your fingers linger on the strap of your bra. “I’ll let you stream longer. But.. once you cum, you have to shut it off.”
“You want to blow me on stream?” Luke asked, incredulously. He could already feel himself start to harden at the thought of this ‘game’ of yours occurring.
“Like, secretly, though.” You said with a slight eye roll. “You can try to keep your composure for as long as you can, but you’ll be all mine for the rest of the night. Okay?”
Luke took a minute to ponder. If he somehow got caught… the consequences would be severe. His reputation would be tarnished. He’d lose his job and his income and the entire career he had worked so hard to build.
But on the other hand.. you looked really fucking sexy, staring at him with your doe-eyes, feigning innocence in the most seductive lingerie he’d ever seen you in.
“Fuck’s sake.” Luke pulled his chair back towards his desk. He tugged his sweatpants down to his ankles, giving you a face full of his half hard cock and his toned, muscular thighs. “You have to be quiet too, you little slut. I seriously cannot get caught.”
“Of course,” you replied, slightly moaning as you took his length into your hand. “You’re so incredibly attractive.”
“Shut up,” Luke said, adjusting his camera angle to absolutely ensure it cut off at his upper chest and nothing lower than that was visible. He took a deep breath and was about to rejoin his stream, when you began sucking him off. “Fuck!”
You pulled your lips off of him with a loud pop. “Come on, Lukey, you can last longer than that.”
“You’re mouth feels so fucking good though,” Luke groaned, threading his fingers through your hair. He took another deep breath and guided your head back to his cock, which was now fully hard and aching for your mouth. This time, when you licked up his shaft, he was more prepared and was able to maintain his chill composure. “Okay. Okay, baby, I’m turning my stuff back on. Be quiet, please.”
You nodded, slowly taking him back into your warm mouth.
Luke turned on his camera. He turned on his mic. He ran a hand through his hair and grabbed his mouse and keyboard. “Okay, I’m back. Chat, please tell me Percy and Thalia didn’t do anything stupid while I was gone.”
“Hey!” You heard, faintly from Luke’s headset. “We didn’t do anything, and if your chat says otherwise, they are lying!”
You giggled as quietly as you could, and clearly the vibrations from such movement felt good for Luke, because you heard him take a sharp intake of breath.
“Wh-whatever. Doesn’t matter. Let’s get back to work.” Luke said defensively.
“What?” Percy asked. “You sound weird, man. Is something wrong?”
“Nothing’s wrong!” Luke replied, too quickly and at an octave higher than he normally speaks. You couldn’t help but get a little nervous. He was terrible at being subtle.
“Okay…” This was a girl’s voice, and sounded like Thalia. “My chat agrees that you’re being weird.”
“Same.” Percy agreed.
“Yeah, well,” Luke scanned his second monitor to check in on how his chat was reacting. He scoffed and rolled his eyes. “My chat is being dumb, as per usual.”
Below the desk, your nerves had subsided and instead you became preoccupied with the notion of possibly getting caught. It was kind of twisted but this caused your lower region to dampen. You lifted your short little skirt over your hips and moved your lacy underwear to the side, giving you access to finger yourself.
You moaned, with your mouth full of thick, heady cock, and brain slightly foggy from the wine consumption. You were close already.
“What?” Luke said, clearly reading something on his monitor. “Chat, that was my phone vibrating on my desk. I did not moan over that headshot Percy made. Be so for real”
“Rude,” Percy said. “I would’ve moaned. I’m like, the god of gaming.”
“Loser.” Luke responded, biting his lower lip and slightly bucking his hips into your mouth. He must’ve been getting close, too.
From that moment on, you were desperate to make Luke finish. You abandoned your slow and gentle place, and took his entire cock down your throat. You silently gagged, and bobbed your head up and down, making sure to suck a bit longer on his leaking tip. You grabbed his balls in your right hand and squeezed, keeping your left hand on his upper thigh.
“Fuck,” Luke murmured, just under his breath. You sucked harder in response. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”
“What is going on, dude?” Percy questioned. “You’re stressing me out.”
Luke glanced over at his chat again.
Luke flipped a middle finger to his camera, and gave a playful, “Chat, you all suck.” Obviously, he loved his fans and was eternally grateful for their support. It was just fun to mess around with them and feign a love hate relationship. It did make him a bit anxious, however, that everyone easily picked up on the fact that something was affecting Luke. It didn’t exactly help that he was really close to finishing and was starting to lose track of what was happening in the game. All he could feel was his cock going in and out and in and out of your soft lips, that were now coated in a mixture of salvia and his precum. It was just about driving him insane.
You, on the other hand, were knuckle deep inside your own cunt and sucking Luke off with so much fervour your jaw was starting to ache. But you loved the feeling. And you were determined to get him off. Now.
Suddenly, Luke felt the familiar feeling build inside himself. Before he realized it was happening, he was shooting thick ropes down your eager throat. “Fuck!” he screamed, legs shaking and eyes squeezing shut. He shuddered and gasped for air as you did not let up on your pace, sucking every last drop of cum from him.
He realized how fucking weird this whole ordeal must’ve looked to his many (many, many) viewers.
Instead of confronting what just happened, he slammed his mouse on the End Stream button and shut off his computer, without so much as a goodbye. He pushed his chair back and grabbed your shoulders, pulling you up to your feet.
You smiled at him sweetly, a sheen of sweat covering your entire body. Luke leaned down and kissed you hungrily.
“Y/n,” he said, once he was out of breath from such an intense kiss. “I.. Need. To be inside of you. And you can never, ever do that again.”
“Mhmm,” you hummed innocently. “Kinda seemed like you really liked it though.”
“Oh, shut up.” Luke said with a grin. “Bed. Now.”
You obliged, heading over to his comfy queen sized bed, unaware that you were about to have the most mind blowing sex of your entire life.
authors note: aaaaa ok. first of all i’d like to apologize. i have not proofread this at all and i wrote each chunk on separate days. i will proofread it eventually and fix the errors lmao.
also! now that all the ~lore~ to this AU is sorted, if you ever wanna send me twitchstreamer!luke specific prompts, i would ADORE THAT.
thank you all again for reading !!!!! <3
taglist: @notacluelessblonde00 @lilyirlevans
#luke castellan x reader#luke castellan x you#luke castellan#percy jackson#pjo#jemiswriting#why am i so embarassed to post this…#oh wait i know#it’s bc i cannot write smut to save my life LOL! :)
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while I think it's worthwhile to talk about the double standards around sex in games, I think it also bears pointing out that it's a good thing that BG3 is successful while just... having sex as a normal, advertised, present part of the game
it's forcing people in rpg circles to have actual conversations around their skittishness with the topic when much more abnormal things (like decapitation) don't carry nearly as much of a taboo
I don't mean that other games don't have sex, but that an rpg where sex isn't just a "complete the romance for a sex reward" exchange is absolutely abnormal. BG3 and D:OS3's written sex scenes are so explicit that I'm fairly sure both would have been considered eroge if larian were founded in japan
and I don't think the right way about it is to snidely point and ask why BG3 is okay (especially because you already know the answer), but to interrogate why everyone's fine with laughing at dismemberment only to go dead silent when two characters start having unspecial sex
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