#coming out tips

[solongstarbird]

pro tip: treat breaking the news of transition to ur extended family or coworkers like an announcement of marriage/pregnancy because even the most conservative types understand the social nuances related to changing how they refer to/treat someone and taking sudden bodily changes in stride if they related to marriage/childbirth. They just need a little push to make the realization that they've already known how to deal with a loved one's transition this whole time and it's just a little different this time around.

[itgetsbetterproject]

National Coming Out Day Round-up!

This is your reminder that you don't have to come out today.

If you don't feel ready, if you're not in a supportive environment, or you just plain don't want to, you don't have to come out.

We're fighting for a world where, in the future, we won't even have to HAVE National Coming Out Day because various sexual and romantic orientations and gender identity will just be expected and accepted.

^ Our 17-year-old Youth Voice Mia wrote this amazing piece for Teen Vogue: "Being a Black-American, Muslim, and LGBTQ+ teen in Texas has been incredibly hard."

^ And LGBTQ+ teacher Sarah wrote up some advice for when you can't be out at home: "Time you can spend in safe situations without hiding who you are will make the moments when you must protect yourself more bearable."

^ Don't forget we've got an entire Coming Out playlist on TikTok with lots of tips, stories, and advice here.

^ And an entire guide to the coming out process here!

[cepheusgalaxy]

Hello, I’m Ameera a 23 years old Muslim lesbian who is trying to come out, I’ve been in the closet with my girlfriend for way too long, because of how dangerous and hard it is to come out as a lesbian to a religious Muslim family, but me and my girlfriend have decided to do whatever it takes and risk it all to come out, do you mind supporting and encouraging us?, we have the plan to go away which is why I have my donation campaign pinned on my profile, if I raise at least that goal I can start the process with my savings, I can’t come out until I’d gotten my apartment and I’m away from family, so please support by donating if you can and help reblog though I know we all have what we dealing with, so I’m not imposing we just need all the support and encouragement we can get, check my pinned post for more information on how you can support, if you are a Muslim queer and you are out, please help with tips on how to make it less complicated, any word of advice is also really needed, we really wanna come out but we need y’all 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️ pride please come through for us, I believe pride is for all

Omg I'm so happy you and your girlfriend are coming out, I really hope everything goes okay

Unfortunately I can't colaborate much :( The coin in my country is at a very low price, and its worth, like, 5 usa dolars. I don't have the money to colaborate and my family is agnostic so I don't have any tips 😔 But I really really really wish everything goes alright and you get everything worked up for your coming out.

I wish you all good ❤

Pride be upon ya

[justkenz]

https://youtu.be/CVOhpfsbfPc

Check out our latest Vlog!

[latestageyouth]

hey.

so i recently came out to my mom. as a trans guy. she said she "respects and supports me" but still uses my deadname and the wrong pronouns. she claims its because its hard to get used to, which i understand, but she doesnt try. she doesnt address me as a guy when were alone. she doesnt use my right pronouns EVER.

we discussed some stuff (such as coming out to extended family, hormones, etc.) on the day that i came out, but shes been ignoring it ever since.

i want....advice. any kind of advice. i want advice on how to best explain non-binary genders to a pretty behind parent. i want advice on how to talk to her. i want advice on ANYTHING that might help.

extra points if youre speaking from experience, where your prents were transphobic at first and now accept you.

<3

[comingoutadvice]

Coming Out Tip #21

Timing is everything.

Location is very important, but timing is one of the more overlooked aspects of a successful coming out. Here are some things to consider.

Firstly, think about the day: sooner or later? Remember not to rush yourself, but it can sometimes be nice to plan ahead because this can sometimes relieve a little anxiety. Certain days may be more available than others, and you want to make sure it is a day where you both will have the time and space you need.

Time of day is also important. One of the most common times is lunchtime: it isn’t right after you wake up, but not in the afternoon or evening where people might be more stressed and tired. Nighttime is one of the worst times, because people’s emotions are more fragile and blown up at night. This can lead to more negative reactions, and you also don’t want to leave it with anyone (including yourself) right before you go to bed. You could also think of a time when you are not in the same place as the other person. 

Don’t be afraid to postpone if something comes up or if someone is in a negative mood! Coming out can bring a whole slew of emotions, so if either of you is feeling sad, angry, stressed, or another negative emotion you may want to wait until later.

Trust yourself; you will know when the timing is right!

[logichotline]

Reminder that waiting to come out until the pandemic is over is the safest option

This is the most dangerous situation to risk being kicked out in.

[buildarocketboys]

Anyone got good, jokey/funny ways to come out as nonbinary (specifically agender)? Would like to come out to some of my friends and I know they will be chill with it so I don't want to make it a big deal

[qu-incy]

pro tip: a way to come out to friends/associates!

i had difficulty coming out without making a big fuss, so here is my solution!

a while ago i decided to finally be honest with myself and my friends/acquaintances about pronouns, preferred names and sexual identity. i found this really hard since many of my associates grew up around a very conservative, more often than not homophobic environment in malaysia (we have garbage laws). since i moved to the uk, i had more freedom for self expression. but i didn't know how to tell my friends who had moved with me. asking them to change pronouns, having The Talk, seemed like i was inconveniencing them, trying to be special, or would set off my anxiety because of potential questions.

so i thought of an alternative way to do this: given that Graphic Design Is My Passion, i put together an infographic that explained basically everything i wanted people to know about me. i also added explanations for nonbinary/genderfluid identities, the use of gay as an umbrella term, etc., since many of my friends are unfamiliar with lgbt+ terms and identities (note i may have mixed up a few things, i just presented them based on how i felt about myself and my own experiences). i added things like exceptions, i.e. legal reasons and when in the presence of parents, since i'm not out to my parents, etc., as well as my attitudes toward certain things, like slurs and people trying to hook me up, as it were.

most importantly i made it a point to talk about how i didnt want people who had misgendered me in the past to make a big deal of apologising: this was a big part of my anxieties and any excessive engagement would make me very uncomfortable. i explained the best way to recover from accidentally using the wrong name/pronoun, and that when receiving this infographic, not to engage with it (outside of any burning questions) so as to continue our relationship seamlessly.

i would basically text people this infographic, with no caption. if we were physically together at the time i would add "hey, i would love if you could fully read this but please don't respond to it irl :)" (this backfired once with a particularly hotheaded friend but otherwise, so far so good)

for the most part, i was really pleasantly surprised by how it worked out!! responses were understanding and nobody made a big deal of it, and the transition was actually very comfortable. i had a friend forward it to some other trans buddies, and i thought to post it here in case anyone felt like this would be a good way for them to come out to.

i attached my infographic--not sure if the quality is all that great--as a point of reference (a lot of stuff is just personal that i blanked out so please bear with that).

if you find this method useful, i'm glad! hopefully it can help out and folks who are struggling to come out in a more subtle/manageable way. plus! if you would like help making your own identity infographic and don't have the means/experience, i'm happy to lend a hand 💕

[profeminist]

If you’re thinking about coming out of the closet

Coming Out: What I'd tell my teen self | Rose and Rosie 

 “We asked lesbian, bisexual, asexual, gay and trans people what they wished they could tell their younger teenage selves. Steffan Zachiyah, lesbian and bisexual YouTubers Rose and Rosie, Abi McIntosh, Yasmin Benoit, and Robert Greene share their message to their teen selves and #LGBT #comingout experiences. #RoseandRosie 

Hayley Kiyoko's Advice On Coming Out And Loving Yourself

"Hayley Kiyoko sat down with us to share her coming out story, her path to self-acceptance, and the mantra she repeats to herself every morning. ❤️”

Also:

8 Tips for Coming Out as Non-Binary

What To Do If A Parent Doesn't Accept You Coming Out as Queer

Coming Out as Bi When You're Muslim and Married

How to come out to your parents, from moms and dads who regret their initial reactions

How To Handle Thanksgiving With Your Family After Coming Out

How to support your child when they come out as LGBT+ (share with parents after coming out)

Proud lesbian teacher explains how she 'comes out every year' to students 

A beautiful coming out story from Jenny Boylan’s Facebook page

If you’re not ready, that’s OK too 

Disclosure is a Spectrum

Coming out is important. Coming out on your own terms and timing = even more important.

More posts on Coming Out

[trans-n-enby-stuff]

I'm considering changing my name, but I'm worried about asking people to make the switch. My parents are homophobic. I'm already put as nb but I just don't know if people are going to make the change.

Hey love! If you’re already out as nonbinary to everyone then I think it’s worth it to try! Of course it’s important to consider first if you think your parents/other people are going to ignore/reject your new name choice and if you’re ready to handle that.

It can be really difficult to come out with something like that to begin with, and being rejected after can make it much more emotionally draining.

Either way, I wish you the best of luck, and you can do this either way!!

- Chris

[comingoutadvice]

Coming Out Tip #20

When someone comes out to you

When someone comes out to you, they have probably thought long and hard about it. They have considered the risks and chosen you specifically because they feel safe around you. What you need to do is make them feel safe and comfortable.

Firstly, make sure they know that you love and support them no matter what. People need to hear this a lot, especially if they have chosen to confide in you. Coming out can bring lots of different and unexpected reactions and for this reason people can get really nervous about coming out. Help them feel comfortable and safe

Additionally, remember that it isn’t about you. Do not make it about you, share your own feelings (except if you also come out to show you are safe for them), or react as if this is difficult for you. However hard it is for you, it is many times harder for them.

Ask what they need. You probably have many questions, but first you should ask if they want to talk now or would be open to having a conversation later. 

Always be loving and kind!

[hurricane-sarcastic]

Reminder that April Fools Day is a good day to come out, because if it backfires and they don't accept you, you can always back out and say, "April Fools!"

**don't come out as a prank if you know you're cis/straight because dude.... not ok

**i actually don't know why it's bad but that just seems... morally wrong... so... don't

[laurenathalasa]

Does anyone have any suggestions on how to start a “coming out” conversation with your parents when your parents don’t talk much?

[trans-n-enby-stuff]

Um... Hi! I'm an awkward demigirl who hasn't come out to anyone yet, but I want... I want someone to know.. and I was thinking my friends since I feel they'll be more supportive (My mom won't even use my NB friends correct pronouns so uh yeah-) but I'm scared too. ...Any advice?

Hey! We’ve answered quite a bit of coming out questions and concerns before, so if you want to take a look here at our coming out tag, then you might find some stuff that could be helpful for you. This post specifically I thought was quite good.

You’re always going to be a little nervous when you come out for the first time, no matter how ready you are, or how accepting you know the people will be. Remember that there are other options if you don’t think you’re capable of telling them face-to-face and that they’re totally acceptable and great. Your comfort is the most important thing here, but sometimes it does just feel better to get it all out there. Good luck!

~ Rhys 💜

[tackylesbian]

good luck to anyone planning to come out today! whether it's to a family member, a friend, or anyone else, i hope it goes just as you plan it to be. be ready to answer questions, and make sure you're in a good situation. don't worry if today isn't a good time, any other day is just as great!

if you need someone to come out to today, reply to this post or shoot me an ask! (if you'd like it to be public) we can all have an online coming out party.