#coming back from the hiatus to say
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toughest 4 minutes 36 seconds i've ever had to sit through
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oh smg4 fixation how far ive fallen for you ............ hhi smg4 fandom waving nervously
#GOING INSANE THEY ROTATE IN MY HEAD TWENTY FOUR SEVEN.....MARIO IS NEXT(SLASH THREATENING)#smg4 fanart#smg4#smg3#smg4 smg3#smg4 eggdog#smg4 beeg smg4#birdyfy art#i cant believe tjis. coming back from my (short) art hiatus and i bring forth MEN to my blog. shaking my head/huge jay/pos#smg34#smg3 fanart#edited#<- i forgot something crucial which i will NOT say because it had me hiding in embarrassment for HOURS
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bug doodles so i can say i drew something
#oc#original character#alien oc#artists on tumblr#art#aliens#sketch#nyx#having a rough month creatively. and mentally. like a really really rough month. but i'm tired of saying that too#i made like three things this year i was excited about and that's it. where did the fun go. im supposed to enjoy it right#if i dont enjoy it then what is the point !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! of anything !!!! i dont enjoy Anything anymore even !!!!!!!!!#why is it already august. almost september. i dont even remember most of 2023 let alone 2024.#i got no drive to draw let alone to push through a drawing when it gets challenging or doesn't turn out right. i barely drew this month#just kinda hated everything. nothing is fulfilling#IF IM NOT HAVING FUN !!! THEN WHAT IS THE POINT !!! WHAT AM I DOING IT FOR#more and more i consider taking a hiatus from art. but what the fuck else do i do with my time then. what if i never come back to it#i got a list of stuff i could draw but either i try and i dont like it or i sit there and wonder why even bother because i wont enjoy it#guys im tired. im so exhaustingly overwhelmingly depressingly fucking tired and i feel no joy in my art#or videogames. or anything.#i need to go to bed
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The fact that these greedy hacks are profiting by stealing from many always free creators specifically now... disgusting. No wonder the number of free creators is dwindling so much in this degraded shithole of a community. Simsulani you are a royal cunt!
#ceci speaks#nonsims#text#negative#simsulani#i hope u shit ur pants in public!#yes coming back from mostly hiatus just to say that#the paywall issue#hellosimsulani
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The unmistakable sound of footsteps approaching begins to fill the air. Whoever is coming seems to have brought some company along…
They are getting closer… and closer… and closer…
…and closer…
……until..................
"Goooooood evenin'!!" Comes the loud greeting from a certain blond man. A big smile on his face and all.
"We beg your pardon for our prolonged absence. It was completely beyond our control..." Then adds the gentleman standing by his side, apologizing on behalf of both, offering a genuine smile along with the apology.
"...BUT! We're back!" And hopefully for good this time…
#[HI HIIIIIII~~ HOW'S EVERYONE DOING?? 8)]#[IDK IF ANYONE REMEMBERS ME OR MY MUSES ANYMORE?? BUT HELLOOO]#[one million years later but we're backkkkkk]#[i'd like to start by apologizing for completely disappearing for months without any announcement]#[life has been far from kind all this year so far and this has greatly and negatively impacted me emotionally]#[like..very VERY badly (harmful stuff and etc)]#[all to a point where i've had to take some time off from most social media]#[and which is also why i haven't checked or replied to any messages anywhere in a while]#[not that i'm the most social and most active person ever but you get what i mean here ;v;]#[the original plan was to come back here like a month or so ago but as you can guess i was unable to due to the same irl issues]#[i'm not gonna lie i'm still not doing well]#[but i wanted to come back or at least try to]#[since writing for these two and the ogre street guys always brings me joy and i also missed everyone here!]#[i'm still unsure if dropping threads will be the way to go for now or not#because i have no idea if my partners are still interested in any threads we had prior my unannounced hiatus]#[or if anyone's still interested in interacting with me and my muses again ;v;]#[so if we have ongoing threads i'll likely be jumping into your IMs over the course of the days to ask about it]#[i just need to check my thread tracker first because i can't remember what i owed last time ;;;;;;]#[as always: we can start new stuff any time in case you're no longer feeling whatever threads we had]#[and we can also start from scratch if that's best too]#[so no worries there!]#[enough blablah from me for now]#[i missed you all so much!]#[and to the new followers this blog somehow earned in my absence: Hi!! Thank you for following and I hope we can interact soon!!]#[hope everyone has been doing great during my absence!! <3]#;speedwagon says (( ic ))#;jonathan says (( ic ))#;ic#(??#;speedwagon withdraws coolly
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gang I'm not sure I have the courage to come out to my boxing coach
#I need to do some sort of physical activity and that always felt good#but it has always been deadname and women's locker room#then big hiatus from my part#and now I'm back again. again with the deadname and women's locker room#but it feels so wrong#and today I felt like shit because there was people in the locker room#but what is the solution?#to come out ?#they'll laugh.#I don't pass#I never pass#I think people at university don't misgender me only because they're kind#but I don't pass#maybe they'll even nod solemnly and say ok we accept you#but we all know they'll never not see the hips the chest the face the high pitched voice#and I have been stuck here since forever#everyone I know. EVERYONE#is now either on t or can pass#even people who've idk started after I was already going to the therapist because of it#and yes everyone has their own oath and yadda yadda yadda#but why I'm stuck?#I don't understand why I can't go on.#I feel like shit#and mother is ok with it but I know she still hatesthis whole thing#I gave her time I swear#but I miss her#and I tried telling her this and she. she doesn't want to hear it#because in her mind “if you really want it you do it”#like I could pass by sheer willpower#personal
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"It's finally calm. Peaceful. Relaxed here if only it was like this last year..No one i hate no one that annoys me--And specially no seaweed hair colored so called king." Kaiba don't say this out loud you fool-you seeing this? he'll sass when those few are away..damnit
"As it should be."
#dash commentary#ic#me: i could let my anxious mind take me away from a fun fandom#also me: or i could post sassy kaiba for fun-#.............................#i'm really fighting to come back sooner right now even tho i did say hiatus truth is#i don't want to completely leave the rpc here + everyone who does make me feel welcomed/happy-#rambling in tags but i do miss everyone and my muses...i was just getting anxious on my*take* but..that shouldnt force me to abandon muses#unless some dont enjoy my takes then that ok/valid bdnfgf#also Tes icon border returns..bc i love <3
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Mom come pick me up the voices are loud again (the image of the poster children of Creepypasta in. Slender's Mansion again. All as one big fuck ass family. Fucked up one with issues abroad. But also one of mutual understanding and what if I want them to heal and grow as people. Forever changed by the events or even what they are fundamentally but still being able to live in this world as who they are now with a support group of beings similar yet so distant from themselves. They can never go back or completely change who they are without damaging themselves or there's nothing else to go back to anymore, so all they can do is move forward. And kill people, that's always a bonus)
#nebula rambles#creepypasta#i like to think that the fucking. creepypasta found family is the beginning of me really#liking found family tropes#im gonna fucking lose it man#there's a whole comic i did back in october of jeff and slendy actually like. talking it out#bc in my mind for these fuckers it's less of 'this one's the brother figure this one's the sister'#and while it. still is there minorly#it's more of like#a bunch of fucked up people (mainly arriving/being found as kids/teens)#coming together under one household with all their problems#and like. are we not going to take advantage of how jeff isn't. exactly mentally sound post fire#like. that's the whole reason for killing his family (or just his parents if we really go ham with homicidal liu) aside from the moment he-#killed randy but that's besides the point#i need to catch up and finish the ben arg so i can't say too much on ben's side#but the general shit of how it is before the arg got put on hiatus. oughgh#do you fuckers have any idea how hard i think of them once the floodgates open#and thinking of them as like. a rowdy bunch just trying to get by with what they have#with the house they have with a fuck ass Thing that brought them here#and the house slowly becomes more like a home the longer theyre here#the older they get#im. oughgh#anyways hiii ask me my creepypasta headcanons /nsrs /j
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so this is prolly exposing Cy's Gacha Brainrot but i really fucking wish Brave Frontier was still around and the devs didnt devolve into NFTs and AI bullshit
it was genuinely one of the best mobile games at the time especially above other gachas cause it was one of the more no-pressure ones on the market and it was pretty f2p-friendly imo
the unit drop rate was also pretty generous, especially the longer the game went on and the more powerful units came out, free players could clear most content after like 3 10-pulls, which you got the resources for either by mail or just playing the main story where u got one for every sub-area clear
it also didnt have a huge reliance on the multiplayer aspects of the game; pvp, raids, and guilds were all entirely optional and the first 2 had rewards that were pretty easy to get for collection's sake, and that's what i really liked about it
on top of that, it had the best rpg combat of any mobile game i know of-- no game has been able to scratch the same itch that BF did-- not even FFBE, which was essentially "BF, but Final Fantasy" like it was essentially the same, but i feel it added TOO much to the combat and made it feel a lot slower as a result
#cyspeaks#hi im diseased#anyway i fucking hate gacha games dont get me wrong but i honestly really loved BF#it was fun and forgiving and very easy to get into#it was also very easy to come back to after i had had a hiatus from the game n all my units were outdated#something i cant say about other games... genshit.
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goes into tags for one of my fandoms. watches that one fandom's wheel of fortune swing back around to 'why are m*rder hornets building nests on my blog?'
#the metaphor is thus: someone in fandom wants to create a hornet character. no one wants to interact with hornets.#bc they sting and hurt irl. some people in comm might even belong to cultures where hornets hurt their relatives or themselves.#the hornet fan gets mad. we're oppressing them! we're mean because we won't write with them! then they think they hit a hail mary:#'how can you be mad at me writing a hornet when you guys play dragons and 0wlbears? they're way more deadly.'#and so we all shut up sit back and watch the hornet fan begin to panic that actual irl stinging hornets start circling their content#and entrenching themselves in fandom after a long winter hiatus bc everyone else sprayed them with pesticide last time they rolled up.#the whole house is infested. the hornet fan has to run. abandon blog. they swear they're not an actual hornet and don't understand why#their hornet-aligned content attracted real life hornets.#they realize the difference between irl hornets and the fictional dragons and 0wlbears.#all a metaphor for an irl h*te group that for some reason people want to romanticize/make cool villains around...#in a fandom based around the dragons and 0wlbears killing and eating hornets.#fuckin wild it's happening again.#out of stories#SIPPING MY MILK AS I SHAKE UP A BIG CAN OF FASH-B-GONE BC THE EDGY COLLEGE KIDS DON'T REALIZE SOME CONTENT IS ALWAYS GONNA BE P0LITICAL#AN ACTUAL MEMBER OF THAT GROUP IS JUST GONNA SEE PROPAGANDA WHEN YOU DRAW YOUR KAWAII OC IN THE UNIFORM --#WE'RE NOT TRYING TO BE RUDE WE'VE DONE THIS DANCE TO DEATH WHENEVER THIS SHIT EMBOLDENS THE ACTUAL ASSHOLES.#WHEN WE SAY 'HEY DON'T DO THAT' IT'S NOT COMING FROM A PLACE OF CENSORSHIP IT'S 'HEY YOU'RE GONNA GET STUNG WE DON'T WANT THAT.'#vent //#tbd //
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😺
#i haven't addressed yoongi's situation yet because i'm honestly still not hit by it i guess. like it didnt gwt to me yet#i dont think ill ever love anyone the same as i love him you know what i mean#he has been the first reason of my self development. like he literally raised me??? i learned from him how to be the person i am today#and its like im saying goodbye to a family member. the thing is i have never griefed anyone's absence like this#its like a part of my soul will be missing until he comes back#but at the same time i know what he would want for me. to move on and to become my own reason#he would want me to be kind to myself. to focus on myself and not miss him that much.#he would want that for all of us right#but i have a very hard time processing things. do you guys remeber the festa last year? when we found out theyll be going on hiatus#the reality of it snd the fact that it will be happening hit me onky after around 3 months.#thats when i first cried because i realized what it meant. ofc i knew but it didnt occur to the emotional part of my brain at that time#and i feel like im truly gonna fall apart when THIS hits me in 3 months lol#my life has never been worse and thats honestly the time when i need the reassurance the most#when i need the people i love and find comfort in the most.#but its just me and thats technically just my problem. but since i am talking about my view on this then thats okay i guess hahah anyway#i just hope he knows there are milions of ppl who love him as much as i do. and thats like extra love like forever & beyond type of shit#i honestly dont think other people ever truly fully understand how we feel towards them. especially when you really love somebody#because they have their own opinions about themselves. they debate whether they deserve some kind of treatment or not. we all do that right#and i just know he does that too. i just reslly want him to feel completely loved and cherished and appreciated.#i want him to see himself through our eyes. to surround himself with people who see him exactly the way we do.#to fall in love with somebody who will see him like we see him#nobody deserves better life than this man. and i hope that after our reunion he will live that life to the fullest 💓 i can't wait to see it#anyway. if somebody needs to talk about it or wants to get sadness out of your system - im here 💓#please keep your heads up and lets wait for him 💓#we have esch other and we will be okay 💓#sorry for typos i can barely see its 1am 🤓
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#irl rambles#dunno if y'all remember but my work had been saying for months they were going to offer me a part time job#they just kept it back saying they have to work out the roster#anywho because I was so sure i was going to get it I told one of my friends who recently bought a house#he said that he can't rent out in the first year due to government requirements but he'd be more than happy to move in with him#but then work took back the contract and on top of that have cut my hours back#like theyve taken 2.5hrs off each of my shifts#that adds up!#so i told my friend i don't have secure work and how upset I was about it#he would prefer I have a stable job but if I can start saving now I could move in next June#the problem is saving until then#the bills are so high at my current house#my housemate owns the house and he works from home#and he has the air con on all the time#takes hour long showers#and leaves all the darn lights on!#so by the time I have a bit of savings the bills come and practically take what I've saved#legit the reason I was on hiatus for so long is because of money struggles#i don't feel stable rn#i don't have family to help out either#it got to the point I was strongly wondering why I'm atill living when I could barely afford it tbh#but at least i have a goal in life now#I'd rather cut back on food now so I can afford moving out#hopefully work won't screw me over further#or another job actually hires me#ahhh I hate capitalism
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Some stuff I've drawn semi recently
#keese draws#oc art#oc#ocs#furry#furry oc#furry art#Ive been going thru it recently but Ill survive#on the bright side the pet sitting job for my aunt is coming up soon#so Ill have a house to myself for a bit at least#Im probably still gonna be fairly offline for the foreseeable future unless I somehow manage to fix my sleep schedule anytime soon#not to say I will be on any sorta complete hiatus or anything just that Im not getting any more active most likely#not that I think anyone rly cares at this point since its been the norm for a while now but yknow#Ill still be around to answer asks and stuff just dont freak out if I take a lil bit to see it 👍#anyways enough of being a downer Im actually pretty happy with these even if theyre mostly just doodles#also I havent posted any art of these guys in a While but say hi to them while you can cause theyre back into the void of my brain now#first is keese (the oc™) second is toon and third is clyve#all from different stories but toon and clyve are both from the magic cat universe#their paths never meet tho the closest connection they have has to go through like 4 characters first#you can also tell theyre from different stories because one is anthro and the other isnt lol#generally speaking I consider anthro designs slightly more canon but both are canon depending on the story#not in a shapeshifting way just in a me being an inconsistent bitch sorta way#but yeah keese the oc is much older than either of those two I just dont talk abt them or their story ever#but hey if any of yall remember suckerz those two are besties#suckerz is sort of younger than the other two and sort of much older than all three#shes a sort of updated version of a reallyyyy old sona sort of character I had in like 6th grade I think#back during my lilo and stitch experiment oc era where I had one that was music themed#I also had a digimon variant of her she was called like beatramon or smth like that#she was basically a hypothetical music mascot and shes kind of still that tbh#if I ever get enough into making music that I start posting shit it will be my music mascot
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What I thought was gonna be a Noe flashback arc is turning out to be a Dham arc. Which is a win either way, so yay!
#dee p thoughts#vanitas no carte#I will say ngl this is nothing on mochijun herself but the recent releases is kind of taking the wind out of my sails for the series adbdal#its just feels so staggered now that the plot felt like it wasnt moving at all but even now with this feeling like the most movement we've#had it feels like. we've slowed to a snails pace. a half-step to anywhere-#very exciting to have a return from hiatus and I think to an extent she probably has to financially (dont know how any of that works) but I#prefer to have a long hiatus and chapters come back as they normally are than off and on and half chapters. oh well ah...
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#The funniest thing about trying to sift through an old/small fandom#That mostly exists in blogspot blogging format (not this one but for a game series from the 90s/00s I recently rediscovered)#is that nearly all of the blogs are dead and nothing but a decade's worth of posts of people going#'Sorry I haven't been posting much lately!'#'Thinking about going on hiatus!' 'Back from hiatus!'#'Sorry I haven't posted a lot!'#I'd say they make up a good like 40% of the total posts#Makes me realize it's probably best to just not post stuff like that every single time you take a break?#bc I get disappointed when I find a big inactive blog then realize almost all the content is those kinda posts#I know it's hard especially in an old fandom that has a nice/friendly community but not much/any new content coming out though#bc you don't want to just disappear or lose touch but also after many years sometimes it's just like. SoOo. What's there new to say?#That hasn't already been said or done to death 49483829 different ways#Also I guess that's why tumblr is easier by design to stay active on than something like a blogspot#because you can just reblog other people's stuff even when you have nothing much to contribute yourself#and this one never seems to totally run out of new fan made stuff to share which is great#p
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i can’t believe I haven’t explained to the general public how Bain is an alien. yeah there was that ONE thing I sent AC but that doesn’t count okay 😆
Payday 2 spoilers hahaa
So during the end cutscene, the couple seconds where jacket throws his tape… there’s a weird stone in the background.
It’s written in Kataru! Luckily I know the cipher… though I can’t be bothered to find a higher quality one so wfejvdjd
Okay okay hear me out
Kataru cipher is written from right to left, top to bottom.
BAIN/OURWATCHER/FALLEN
Because this is a tombstone :) if you’re wondering what a Watcher is, it’s explained. ovks had a limited dlc for payday 2 called the “completely overkill pack” and there happened to be a certain mask description for a particular one…
Watchers in the book of Enoch were angels who wanted to be with human women and were punished for that… however we’re not sure if the book of Enoch is canon to payday lore (even though it mentions Nephilim) so I say that Watchers are aliens. Generally. Something very not human.
It makes the meaning of that translation interesting. It gives depth to other weird details that are in the game.
Like in the contact database, Bain says something along the lines of “I am the gatekeeper, or the watchman, if you will.” and “whatever I tell you might be a lie to protect myself. If I told you the truth, you wouldn’t believe me” and if the truth is that Bain is actually the gang’s Watcher, it makes sense.
“I don’t see how it could’ve gone this way, but I’m only human.” I mean, mostly. It’s not technically a lie
Bain is partially human, since he was “born.” He also mentions him having a grandpa who went heisting (big bank stealth) so I would say that the alien stuff is somewhere in his lineage.
He’s very apologetic when a mission fails, by the way. I would speculate that he’s like that because of Hoxton’s arrest but he was like that since the first game. I wonder what he’s trying to make up for :)
All the jokes would have deeper meaning if Bain is an alien of some sort
In the Mega Watcher mask description, it says “they communicate using their minds.” It would fit into how you hear Bain’s voice clearly through even flash bangs, but nobody else’s. There’s actually no official content (that I know of) depicting Bain talking to his crew over earpieces. It’s not like ovks hadn’t modeled earpieces before, look at the guards in the train transport heist! Each time they talk to Bain it’s always over the phone (comic collaboration)
(official Locke and Load comic)
He’s also able to talk to his crew after the EMP bomb goes off in Boiling Point (which took out a whole facility PLUS superhumans)
in that last part he can somehow see what the player is doing as if he has cameras in their masks… except that couldn’t be. Because it shouldn’t be working. If you take the briefcase before Bain asks you to, he has a few different lines like “how did you know I needed that briefcase?” “You read my mind,” and “are you psychic or something?”
and if Bain is a Watcher, these quotes are hilarious. It was right there all along!
“(They) use their large eyes” take a look at the color of the Watcher mask.
Bain’s favorite color is blue. We know it’s true because Crimenet’s color scheme is blue… and Bain’s eyes are blue too. Coincidence? …Maybe. I’m not ruling it out. It would be messed up considering what happens to one of his eyes. My dude got nerfed. and was probably experimented on if what Locke says is anything to go by
“to witness, gather and share information” could they mean the way that the crew can somehow see through walls? How Bain can highlight objectives for you if you can’t find something? Nobody can hide from him.
Bain wears a fleur de lis ring on the pinkie of his right hand. Yes, like the guide of bain
(Something I want to point out, bain is terrible at lying to his team actually. Sooo the detection meter is just future Russian glasses? Yeaahhh sure Bain)
I guess this definitely isn’t mind control or any sort of skill *cough cough* joker *cough* There’s one last thing I want to put down here because it was never explained in canon.
HONESTLY NOT SURE WHAT THIS IS. Could it be the “Watcher of the Star?” is it Bain’s ancestor? or is Bain immortal somehow I don’t know but no normal guy would just have this laying around XD
Bottom line is that if Bain isn’t then he’s definitely SUSPICIOUS. Just putting that out there.
#payday 2#payday 2 spoilers#bain payday 2#fic inspiration#suing ovks for emotional damage#because Bain is trying to make up for something (what he is) and it’s because of how he’s lying to people he cares about#duke theorizes that Bain might’ve been in the middle of training to be the elephant’s watcher#I see that as unlikely by the way Bain talks behind the elephant’s back XD#Bain already had his King 🥲#in my fic series Bain makes a whole nanobot excuse as to why they can hear him all the time#it’s totally believable#I’m also rolling from the fact that Dallas just totally— CALLS bain on his IPHONE#who does that 😭#bro is an alien trust me#and it would fit in with payday canon because the dentist is immortal#akan is psychic. jacket is… SOMETHING… and that Dallas necromancy comic is canon. jimmy counts too I say#Bain is also proficient with all weapons AND canonically taught the gang all the skill sets#me: *comes back from hiatus*#*dabs on you*#*leaves for another month*
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